#spacing out art posts being the best thing for me to do is the worst thing to ever happen to me i wanna post it all rn >:(

[dispotatorulzz]

I don't post wips enough anymore here's something of Viv and Vex, deciding if I want to put thier pony clothes on them or not . I feel like the coats look wacky in this one and I mean. What's a little bit of unsafe practices in the office (not like they gaf /lh)

Also I love seeing the comparisons between my original first sketch to get the idea down and my second "ok time to try and make this make sense" I draw faces alot better quickly than I do bodies and thats interesting to see I think !

[imsobadatnicknames2]

How can you consider yourself any sort of leftist when you defend AI art bullshit? You literally simp for AI techbros and have the gall to pretend you're against big corporations?? Get fucked

I don't "defend" AI art. I think a particular old post of mine that a lot of people tend to read in bad faith must be making the rounds again lmao.

Took me a good while to reply to this because you know what? I decided to make something positive out of this and use this as an opportunity to outline what I ACTUALLY believe about AI art. If anyone seeing this decides to read it in good or bad faith... Welp, your choice I guess.

I have several criticisms of the way the proliferation of AI art generators and LLMs is making a lot of things worse. Some of these are things I have voiced in the past, some of these are things I haven't until now:

Most image and text AI generators are fine-tuned to produce nothing but the most agreeable, generically pretty content slop, pretty much immediately squandering their potential to be used as genuinely interesting artistic tools with anything to offer in terms of a unique aesthetic experience (AI video still manages to look bizarre and interesting but it's getting there too)

In the entertainment industry and a lot of other fields, AI image generation is getting incorporated into production pipelines in ways that lead to the immiseration of working artists, being used to justify either lower wages or straight-up layoffs, and this is something that needs to be fought against. That's why I unconditionally supported the SAG-AFTRA strikes last year and will unconditionally support any collective action to address AI art as a concrete labor issue

In most fields where it's being integrated, AI art is vastly inferior to human artists in any use case where you need anything other than to make a superficially pretty picture really fast. If you need to do anything like ask for revisions or minor corrections, give very specific descriptions of how objects and people are interacting with each other, or just like. generate several pictures of the same thing and have them stay consistent with each other, you NEED human artists and it's preposterous to think they can be replaced by AI.

There is a lot of art on the internet that consists of the most generically pretty, cookie-cutter anime waifu-adjacent slop that has zero artistic or emotional value to either the people seeing it or the person churning it out, and while this certainly was A Thing before the advent of AI art generators, generative AI has made it extremely easy to become the kind of person who churns it out and floods online art spaces with it.

Similarly, LLMs make it extremely easy to generate massive volumes of texts, pages, articles, listicles and what have you that are generic vapid SEO-friendly pap at best and bizzarre nonsense misinformation at worst, drowning useful information in a sea of vapid noise and rendering internet searches increasingly useless.

The way LLMs are being incorporated into customer service and similar services not only, again, encourages further immiseration of customer service workers, but it's also completely useless for most customers.

A very annoyingly vocal part the population of AI art enthusiasts, fanatics and promoters do tend to talk about it in a way that directly or indirectly demeans the merit and skill of human artists and implies that they think of anyone who sees anything worthwile in the process of creation itself rather than the end product as stupid or deluded.

So you can probably tell by now that I don't hold AI art or writing in very high regard. However (and here's the part that'll get me called an AI techbro, or get people telling me that I'm just jealous of REAL artists because I lack the drive to create art of my own, or whatever else) I do have some criticisms of the way people have been responding to it, and have voiced such criticisms in the past.

I think a lot of the opposition to AI art has critstallized around unexamined gut reactions, whipping up a moral panic, and pressure to outwardly display an acceptable level of disdain for it. And in particular I think this climate has made a lot of people very prone to either uncritically entertain and adopt regressive ideas about Intellectual Propety, OR reveal previously held regressive ideas about Intellectual Property that are now suddenly more socially acceptable to express:

(I wanna preface this section by stating that I'm a staunch intellectual property abolitionist for the same reason I'm a private property abolitionist. If you think the existence of intellectual property is a good thing, a lot of my ideas about a lot of stuff are gonna be unpalatable to you. Not much I can do about it.)

A lot of people are suddenly throwing their support behind any proposal that promises stricter copyright regulations to combat AI art, when a lot of these also have the potential to severely udnermine fair use laws and fuck over a lot of independent artist for the benefit of big companies.

It was very worrying to see a lot of fanfic authors in particular clap for the George R R Martin OpenAI lawsuit because well... a lot of them don't realize that fanfic is a hobby that's in a position that's VERY legally precarious at best, that legally speaking using someone else's characters in your fanfic is as much of a violation of copyright law as straight up stealing entire passages, and that any regulation that can be used against the latter can be extended against the former.

Similarly, a lot of artists were cheering for the lawsuit against AI art models trained to mimic the style of specific artists. Which I agree is an extremely scummy thing to do (just like a human artist making a living from ripping off someone else's work is also extremely scummy), but I don't think every scummy act necessarily needs to be punishable by law, and some of them would in fact leave people worse off if they were. All this to say: If you are an artist, and ESPECIALLY a fan artist, trust me. You DON'T wanna live in a world where there's precedent for people's artstyles to be considered intellectual property in any legally enforceable way. I know you wanna hurt AI art people but this is one avenue that's not worth it.

Especially worrying to me as an indie musician has been to see people mention the strict copyright laws of the music industry as a positive thing that they wanna emulate. "this would never happen in the music industry because they value their artists copyright" idk maybe this is a the grass is greener type of situation but I'm telling you, you DON'T wanna live in a world where copyright law in the visual arts world works the way it does in the music industry. It's not worth it.

I've seen at least one person compare AI art model training to music sampling and say "there's a reason why they cracked down on sampling" as if the death of sampling due to stricter copyright laws was a good thing and not literally one of the worst things to happen in the history of music which nearly destroyed several primarily black music genres. Of course this is anecdotal because it's just One Guy I Saw Once, but you can see what I mean about how uncritical support for copyright law as a tool against AI can lead people to adopt increasingly regressive ideas about copyright.

Similarly, I've seen at least one person go "you know what? Collages should be considered art theft too, fuck you" over an argument where someone else compared AI art to collages. Again, same point as above.

Similarly, I take issue with the way a lot of people seem EXTREMELY personally invested in proving AI art is Not Real Art. I not only find this discussion unproductive, but also similarly dangerously prone to validating very reactionary ideas about The Nature Of Art that shouldn't really be entertained. Also it's a discussion rife with intellectual dishonesty and unevenly applied definition and standards.

When a lot of people present the argument of AI art not being art because the definition of art is this and that, they try to pretend that this is the definition of art the've always operated under and believed in, even when a lot of the time it's blatantly obvious that they're constructing their definition on the spot and deliberately trying to do so in such a way that it doesn't include AI art.

They never succeed at it, btw. I've seen several dozen different "AI art isn't art because art is [definition]". I've seen exactly zero of those where trying to seriously apply that definition in any context outside of trying to prove AI art isn't art doesn't end up in it accidentally excluding one or more non-AI artforms, usually reflecting the author's blindspots with regard to the different forms of artistic expression.

(However, this is moot because, again, these are rarely definitions that these people actually believe in or adhere to outside of trying to win "Is AI art real art?" discussions.)

Especially worrying when the definition they construct is built around stuff like Effort or Skill or Dedication or The Divine Human Spirit. You would not be happy about the kinds of art that have traditionally been excluded from Real Art using similar definitions.

Seriously when everyone was celebrating that the Catholic Church came out to say AI art isn't real art and sharing it as if it was validating and not Extremely Worrying that the arguments they'd been using against AI art sounded nearly identical to things TradCaths believe I was like. Well alright :T You can make all the "I never thought I'd die fighting side by side with a catholic" legolas and gimli memes you want, but it won't change the fact that the argument being made by the catholic church was a profoundly conservative one and nearly identical to arguments used to dismiss the artistic merit of certain forms of "degenerate" art and everyone was just uncritically sharing it, completely unconcerned with what kind of worldview they were lending validity to by sharing it.

Remember when the discourse about the Gay Sex cats pic was going on? One of the things I remember the most from that time was when someone went "Tell me a definition of art that excludes this picture without also excluding Fountain by Duchamp" and how just. Literally no one was able to do it. A LOT of people tried to argue some variation of "Well, Fountain is art and this image isn't because what turns fountain into art is Intent. Duchamp's choice to show a urinal at an art gallery as if it was art confers it an element of artistic intent that this image lacks" when like. Didn't by that same logic OP's choice to post the image on tumblr as if it was art also confer it artistic intent in the same way? Didn't that argument actually kinda end up accidentally validating the artistic status of every piece of AI art ever posted on social media? That moment it clicked for me that a lot of these definitions require applying certain concepts extremely selectively in order to make sense for the people using them.

A lot of people also try to argue it isn't Real Art based on the fact that most AI art is vapid but like. If being vapid definitionally excludes something from being art you're going to have to exclude a whooole lot of stuff along with it. AI art is vapid. A lot of art is too, I don't think this argument works either.

Like, look, I'm not really invested in trying to argue in favor of The Artistic Merits of AI art but I also find it extremely hard to ignore how trying to categorically define AI art as Not Real Art not only is unproductive but also requires either a) applying certain parts of your definition of art extremely selectively, b) constructing a definition of art so convoluted and full of weird caveats as to be functionally useless, or c) validating extremely reactionary conservative ideas about what Real Art is.

Some stray thoughts that don't fit any of the above sections.

I've occassionally seen people respond to AI art being used for shitposts like "A lot of people have affordable commissions, you could have paid someone like $30 to draw this for you instead of using the plagiarism algorithm and exploiting the work of real artists" and sorry but if you consider paying an artist a rate that amounts to like $5 for several hours of work a LESS exploitative alternative I think you've got something fucked up going on with your priorities.

Also it's kinda funny when people comment on the aforementioned shitposts with some variation of "see, the usage of AI art robs it of all humor because the thing that makes shitposts funny is when you consider the fact that someone would spend so much time and effort in something so stupid" because like. Yeah that is part of the humor SOMETIMES but also people share and laugh at low effort shitposts all the time. Again you're constructing a definition that you don't actually believe in anywhere outside of this type of conversations. Just say you don't like that it's AI art because you think it's morally wrong and stop being disingenuous.

So yeah, this is pretty much everything I believe about the topic.

I don't "defend" AI art, but my opposition to it is firmly rooted in my principles, and that means I refuse to uncritically accept any anti-AI art argument that goes against those same principles.

If you think not accepting and parroting every Anti-AI art argument I encounter because some of them are ideologically rooted in things I disagree with makes me indistinguishable from "AI techbros" you're working under a fucked up dichotomy.

[pigdemonart]

Battle Subway Depot Agents (by pig-demon)

When I made designs for these guys last year I didn’t really think they needed colored references/master post, but since then I’ve drawn them a lot! Also people have added them to their fanfics and drawn fanart! So I figured it was time I made a post for easy ref. :]

These designs are obviously free to use, just give credit (and link me your work if you're comfortable, because it makes me happy to see!) All I request is to stay respectful to their pronouns and skin colors, ya knooow… 👍 note: The pokemon on their cards are all companions, not the ones they use on the Battle Subway. Except Jackie...the litwicks are just there to fill space/give them company.

More info under cut:

Edit: Important disclaimer:

These are again my designs/interpretations for the agents. Please don’t treat them as canon or as the only, quintessential designs for these literal background npcs. Many people have done takes on them before and after me, even back in 2010. It feels silly to ask, but due to past experience, I ask that you please DONT hunt down anyone that does a different take on the depot agents!! 👍

Tags:

I'm gonna start tagging them individually, but for now all Depot Agent comics and art on this blog are tagged under Depot Agents.

Height chart:

I’m not too strict about heights, so I don’t really care about actual measurements. Here’s an approximation of what I tend to visualize though:

Sexualities/Gender Identities: I don't have official labels for each and every agent because I like keeping things fluid for characters to develop these traits on their own. However, as a queer person, I enjoy designing characters who are also queer, therefore I can safely say none of these characters are straight. The ones who are set in stone are Ramses (gay man), Cloud (lesbian woman,) Jackie (non-binary.) Furze uses he/they pronouns but their gender is undetermined. I also welcome anyone giving the agents a different gender identity to suit them (as long as it's done respectfully.)

Notes about each agent...

Cameron:

- Cameron dyes parts of his hair blonde and keeps other parts in black. This is because he is a big fan of Elesa and her fashion choices.  - Though there have been a few occasions to meet his idol, he is always way too nervous to approach her, feeling deep down that he'll mess up somehow. - He practices modeling poses in secret. He loves flourishes and flare, but is simply too insecure to put it on display. - Of his coworkers, he gets along the best with Furze. He's the easiest to talk to because Furze will do most of the talking. - Cameron is easily intimidated — even mean Pokémon can make him nervous. Though, his two worst fears are being left in a room alone with Jackie, and being left alone in a room with Isadore. - He takes advantage of his height to sometimes hide behind some of his coworkers. - Cameron is much better at Pokémon battles than he gives himself credit for. Emmet and Ingo were pleasantly surprised by this, since Cameron was promoted to fit a temporary role on the Battle Subway. They happily made him a permanent member when he proved himself capable. - His Dwebble (Pebby) is secretly very strong, and rushes to protect Cameron when it can. Cam sometimes thinks Pebby helps him feel more confident in himself too.  - If he stumbled into any of his coworkers outside of work, he would simply explode of embarrassment. - He is the youngest child and only son of his family. He lives in his own apartment in Nimbasa.

Cloud:

- Cloud (like Ramses) knew the twins when they were very young. - She used to be an ace trainer in her youth, even going so far to compete in the Pokémon league. Winning and becoming the champ was the most important part of her journey, but something happened along the way that changed that outlook. - It seems with age, her competitiveness has mellowed out. However, she maintains an intense energy when battling.  - Her favorite types are Psychic and Flying types. Swoobat (Sweetie) is her ace.  - Her favorite hobby is baking, and she often bakes sweets for the crew. She knows all their favorite flavors by now! - She prioritizes keeping a friendly relationship with all her coworkers and thinks of them fondly. She considers Ramses family after all the years of working together!  - She is a big fan of Brycen's movies and can recite the lines. - She lives with her wife in Anville. - Cloud loves doing maintenance work both at home and in Gear Station. She enjoys bringing her own tools and industrial flashlight.

Furze:

- Furze only has one volume setting (mid loud,) but he finds himself feeling right at home when talking to either one of the twins. - Furze has ADHD, and this is reflected in some of his habits, most visibly is his fidgeting when sitting still for too long. - He rides a bike to work every day. When he is late, Cloud clocks in for him so he doesn't get in trouble. - This is a kind of a guy that sits crouched gargoyle style on chairs. Only outside of work, of course. Bad posture could get him in trouble. - While working on the Battle Subway, there will be times Furze feels sorry for his opponents and offers to quietly let them pass anyways. This...has also gotten him in trouble. :[ - He went to the same elementary school as Isadore in Castelia. Though Isadore seems to have forgotten their short-lived acquaintance, Furze has not. This is part of the reason Furze claims they are in fact good friends!!! - Furze is the middle child of a big family. He lives with his mom and takes care of her, along with his many Darumakas and Darmanitan. All of his Pokemon have famous trains names. - He collects model trains. Naturally.

Isadore

- Isadore had plans to become the station master the moment he was hired as a depot agent, but alas... (sad trumpet sound.) - As a youth, he was more interested in science and engineering over Pokemon battles. He enjoys the strategizing aspect, at most. Not so much the competitiveness. - In addition, his Pokemon are all rescues and not used for battling. He's had his Watchog (Winston) since he was in his late teens. - His Electrode (Gregor) and Voltorb (Leonard) were rescued from the likes of Team Plasma. - Isadore admits he understands Pokemon better than humans. This has been apparent his whole life. - In spite of acting like a sitcom villain, Isadore cares about the management of Gear Station and the safety of the passengers to an incredible degree. He sees it as a personal life goal to assist in the management of Gear Station, as well as the success of the Battle Subway. - Though it pained him to become a subordinate to the twins, he begrudgingly accepts it for the greater good. - His almost militant efficiency certainly made up for his years of antagonizing the twins before they became the bosses. Ingo and Emmet understand this better than anyone. - Isadore keeps tabs on all of the staff members. So he very well knows all their birthdays and makes it a point to celebrate it. This is by no means a -happy- or -festive- event. It's just customary. - Like Furze, he was originally from Castelia, but now resides in Nimbasa. Isadore's only family is his mom and she lives in his childhood home with their Stoutland. - Isadore would have probably been voiced by every glasses guy ever J. Michael Tatum had he not already been cast as dear Emmet lmao

Jackie

- Jackie is a mystery and they like keeping it that way. When they talk, it's practically impossible to determine what is a lie or truth, especially if the subject is themselves or their background. - They love scaring Cameron the most and will ask to be paired with him whenever possible. They claim Cameron is their "favorite coworker," while Isadore is the least favorite. - It's plain to see why -- Jackie is the only one that doesn't passively tolerate Isadore's tirades. - Though my comics sometimes may allude to Jackie being a ghost/supernatural, this is not confirmed nor canon. I just personally enjoy toying with the concept. : ) That being said...

- Item #: SCP 7453

- Object Class: Euclid

- Special Containment Procedures: The ████ ██████ is ██████ within ████-██████. - Ingo and Emmet choose to not question anything about Jackie, since it's clear they're one of the more efficient workers. However it can be a safety concern... - Cloud and Ramses have worked with Jackie for a long time, though they've forgotten somehow. They believe Jackie is a new hire since they appear to be young. - Anyone trying to make sense of Jackie's employee records simply can't bring themselves to any conclusions. It's better to ignore the inconsistencies. - Jackie has never been seen to leave Gear Station. Jackie has never been seen in anything but their uniform. Jackie has never been confirmed to eat, drink or blink. Jackie knows your secrets. Jackie thinks it's... amusing.

Ramses

- Ramses sometimes misses having a full head of hair, but he thinks his signs of age make him look distinguished. (he is correct.) - Ramses is sort of the "mom friend," making sure everyone's concerns are heard, as well as trying to keep the peace whenever a conflict might arise. - If another coworker is feeling low, Ramses will try to cheer them up with a lighthearted joke or offer advice if they'd like it. - When the twins were promoted to bosses of the Battle Subway, Ramses cried because he felt so proud. - In most circumstances, he is a very simple and logical man. He is quick to find solutions and tries not to fret over the little stuff. It's not good for his heart after all. - His ace is his Pikachu (Musa,) though the mouse is more of a lap pet now. At home, he also has an Audino (Sara) and a Manectric (Nubi) who keep Ramses' husband company. His Klinklang (Moli) is the only one of his personal pokemon that accompany him to work nowadays. - Ramses considers Cloud family. They are best friends and love having family gatherings outside of work. They also gossip a lot, and don't mind when Jackie decides to join. - Ramses jokes about looking forward to retirement, but really doesn't want to leave until he is physically incapable of working anymore. Gear Station is like a second home to him.

In-Game Quotes

The most important reference of all are their in-game quotes, of course, so I'm adding it to the post. A lot of their personality traits can be extracted and interpreted from these few lines. And I personally love that about Pokemon NPCs -- there's a lot of room to explore and play with. Some appear very obvious. Cameron practically announces that he isn't ready for the battle that's about to ensue and seems genuinely surprised to win. Furze comes out the gate talking about the subject they actually care about, which is their job and their love for trains. The two of them are very easy to understand. Now, Ramses lines allude to a gentle and simple personality. He views himself with humility, and maybe even with a bit of humor comparing himself to a train and to his opponent to a station. If he loses he shows no signs of disappointment, he just accepts defeat with one last honest quip. It s also amusing to see the Depot Agents all use train metaphors to describe themselves since it falls in line with how Ingo and Emmet talk.

In comparison, Cloud does the same thing calling herself the terminal instead. Immediately, she is way more daring, though still keeping a sense of professionalism. To me, it's obvious she is competitive as she even admits she was expecting to win ("Ah...I didn't see it coming.") Jackie's lines are fun since it's up to interpretation if they are being literal or lying. It's almost like they are more interested in confusing/creeping out their opponent than actually beating them. To me, it gives off a mischievous vibe. Isadore's opener "There are only two roads in life." is a curious one because it almost feels like he is trying to be philosophical. Definitely a guy who views himself as an intellectual, regardless if that’s true or not. I like to think it's a saying he really believes in, and it applies to his life. The road he likes (long route) vs the road he hates (shortcut) -- fighting tooth and nail to become boss vs biting his tongue and accepting Ingo and Emmet as the Subway Masters.

Those are just my thoughts on how I write these characters. Please have fun playing with these lines too!

[simplydnp]

hey there!

I kind of consider you the resident dnp expert (at least in dnp culture) so I wanted your opinion on a question that's been building for a while now.

What are the boundaries for dnp now?

There are so many things that I feel have changed even in the last four years: writing smutty rpf was Gross and Weird, along with art along that line, speculating about their relationship was ABSOLUTELY a no-go, all things that I see happening on Tumblr now. And I'm not saying that's a bad thing!! I'm just acknowledging things have changed over time. They're different people now and so are we, and the "we know you know" era is lots of fun.

I was browsing reddit today (bad idea, do not recommend) and came across a post from a new Phannie asking if DnP were in a relationship. And while I agree that we cannot say for absolute certain that they are, the responses had a VERY different vibe than on here, emphasizing how bad the speculation was (true) and essentially saying "don't even think about that, just enjoy their content." (or something to that extent.)

Which... is very different from this here website in which we joke about them being horney for each other constantly lmao.

Being a very rules-driven person, I like expectations to be made abundantly clear for pretty much everything. So that's why I want to ask: Is there a line here? Are we crossing that line? How defined is that line? (All of this, of course, I recognize is your opinion and yours alone, and if this is posted I encourage anyone else to share their two-cents in a respectful way.)

Obviously, trying to find out where they live/things like that is very clearly crossing a boundary. But is there some sort of limit or boundary I (and tbh the rest of the phandom), in your opinion, should be keeping in mind?

thanks xx

hi!

'resident expert' is a hefty title, i'm just here trying my best!

'what are the boundaries for dnp now?' is really a great question. cause the thing is, we used to know. there used to be a fairly well-defined and mostly agreed upon line, and ever since the dapg revival in particular, the line keeps moving.

i'll be honest, i never really saw phanfic as rpf, even though it is. my stance on phanfic is the same as dnps: it's a beautiful expression of art and creativity and is so, so important. they've always been pro-fic (even though we subjected them to some absolutely horrific crack fics), so i don't think 'smutty' fic has ever been gross or too far. they've given their blessing, and, as the conversation has been in fandom communities the last few years, rpf isn't 'for' the people in them, it's for the fans. so i digress.

art is much the same way. they love art! they even included art of them kissing in a tumblr tag video back in the day, so to say that's not allowed especially after they're out is kind of crazy to me.

i think the line with stuff like that was showing it directly to dnp--tagging them in explicit stuff, that kind of thing. but creating it? go for it! it's always been a green light. (i think fans have previously overpoliced this and we lost a lot of great fic, art, and community members over it)

browsing reddit is always a Choice. i've never participated on dnp reddit before but i am aware that it is an entirely different space than here. something that's important, i think (and i think you think this too as you're asking about them), is to respect the fandom rules of the place you partcipate in. tumblr is generally one of the most phan-positive places on the internet, especially publicly facing. we make a lot of relationship jokes, particularly because we run on the assumption it's already true, based on what they've both said publicly (mostly dan).

i won't comment on reddit specifically just because i'm not a part of the community there, but the speculation about dnp online was a Lot for a long time. but the worst part of it was the stalking, the digging into personal lives, the contacting family members--that is what was bad. dnp have always had a connection--and, honestly, they kind of love flexing it and kind of always have. they absolutely play into things now, but they certainly did even way before coming out too. i think a certain level of speculation was to be expected, especially in that era of online fandom. but it wasn't just the 'teenage girls' who cared, the media did too, and so did many others.

i think one of the biggest differences now is 1 the awareness of 'our' past and trying to make up for it, and 2 the broader societal conversations about parasocial relationships.

you see this reflected on the snippets ive seen from dnp reddit and dnp twitter. they tend to be Very 'cautious' about the words they say, often undercutting perfectly reasonable statements with 'but whatever their relationship is'. on one hand, they don't want to cross a line, and i can respect that. on the other hand... it's 2024 babes. they just put out merch of them holding hands. dan's directly, intentionally, and explicitly called phil a bottom on dapg. they reacted to all of the pinofs, made jokes about 'theyre touching', and even joked about the tackle being 'wrestling 👀'. dan posted half-naked catboy pics and showed us phil was taking them. the 'watch your step babygirl' tweet & their reactions to it. phil is credited in WAD. they're making threesome jokes about themselves as a unit. i could go on and on.

to me, there's a few things that have 'moved the line' for us, so to speak.

1 - DAPG returning. for the last few years they specifically were not a duo (for projects) anymore. (and no, not because they hated each other). they just weren't. they wanted to focus on their goals and projects. they didn't have to resurrect dapg, but they chose to. marketing and money aside, they knew that if this went over well, it would well and truly revive the 'dan and phil' brand again. it would be specifically returning to being a duo in the public eye. (however they've also fully embraced this in all aspects, including merch, videos, and general attitude)

2 - pinof reacts. even though they'd been out since 2019, we hadn't had regular joint content from them since before that, therefore, while they had become more comfortable with themselves and their 'outness', we hadn't (in terms of them making explicit gay jokes together). so i really think dnp had to de-fang a lot of the 'theyre touching' of it all, because we didn't really know where we stood on it anymore. i think they succeeded, too. we couldn't be here, with the content of the last 3 months, without them tackling it head on (well, as head on as they're want to do).

3 - dapc. genuinely another big shift. they did this for the real fans. purely a passion project, and a specific choice in doing the handhold. they know what we're like. and this wasn't a brief, unplanned, unscripted moment. it's a specifically blocked out scene. they know it's opening a door, and they chose to. this is doubled by the fucking iconic merch selling, and furthered by phil's twitter likes of arguably romantic phanart, and then dan's full straddle like.

even throughout the current 6 months of revival, the line has moved. i don't know where it will settle. dnp keep moving it, in my opinion, and, genuinely, i don't think it's going to leave much to the imagination. as you say, obviously not the stalking or the contacting, but beyond that? especially here on tumblr? i wouldn't get too worried. obviously people will have their opinions, but as long as you're generally respectful and recognize that humans will see your posts and humans interact with them, i think you're good.

my rule of thumb is anything they intentionally put on the table, we can joke about or at the same level. but in terms of art/fic? go off, live your dreams. dan and phil would want you to.

[rorywritesjunk]

Master Post

Hullo! I am Rory. I write about Buggy from One Piece and One Piece Live Action. I decided to cobble a list of things. Unless otherwise specified, the fics can be read as either Anime Buggy or Live Action Buggy. Also I really like using song lyrics as titles so that's a thing. (Also my main account is @thehohwitch)

Requests are open as of 8/16/24!

Rules: No s-xual assault, *ncest, cheating, or age big age gaps (at least within a five year difference) things like that. I primarily write F reader with Buggy but I'm happy to write male as well, as well as nonbinary and trans. I don't do descriptions unless asked. I will also write for girl Buggy, just ask!

Also, if I am not vibing with a request, I will decline it, however I will also give it up to three attempts before deciding on it.

Also, please do not message me asking me to commission you for art. It is uncomfortable. I'm a friendly person but that is a boundary I don't want crossed. Works are under the cut! (Updated 6/17/24)

For Chapter Fics, please go here! *Fics in that link feature my OCs Sunny, Cupcake, and Birdie, as well as anything that is several chapters.

For one-shots, look below the cut!

Buggy is the Ultimate Girl Dad Headcanons Headcanons pt 1 Headcanons pt 2 (More indepth) Headcanons pt 3 (More!) Lil Buggy's Big Adventure (One-shot) One Shots "Pampering Buggy" PG-13 A fic of you pampering Buggy after he has a frustrating day.

"I won’t treat you like you’re oh so typical" Soft R Buggy wakes you up to help him with his makeup and he sometimes get grabby.

"All I dream of lately is how to get you underneath me" Soft R, sequel to "...oh so typical" It was Buggy’s turn to do your makeup.

"I will never ask you for anything, Except to dream sweet of me" PG-ish Look, everyone has some kind of secret. You just didn’t want Buggy to find this one out. "We’ll cry later or cry now, but baby, Heartbreak feels so good" PG-13ish Buggy messes up, there’s a fight, and he realizes how much you mean to him.

"So let’s set out to sea, love, ‘cause you are my medicine" PG-13ish Buggy has another frustrating day so you cook him some comfort food.

"I have seen no other Who compares with you" PG-13. Buggy decides you need your own ‘look’.

"best be prepared to get all that you bargained for" PG to PG-13. Buggy isn’t used to the gentle touch you give him since you joined his crew three months ago.

"there’ll be space for you always in my harmony" PG. Buggy finds out you have a hidden talent. "Home is wherever I’m with you" PG-13ish. You wanted to keep your relationship a secret but Buggy just wants you to join his crew.

"And all of my wildest dreams They just end up with you and me" PG. Richie is a pretty boy, yes he is, but so is Buggy. "I know it’s just a number but you’re the eighth wonder" R-ish. Buggy loves that you have a pair of glasses for every day of the week. "breathe the freezing crystal air, watch my baby crack a smile" G-PGish. You and Buggy agreed on exchanging just one gift for the Winter Solstice, but he’s a pirate and doesn’t follow the rules.

"Suppose I never ever let you Kiss me so sweet" PG-13ish Your healing powers are limited to one person a day but that doesn’t keep Buggy from demanding you heal him. "Dancing kisses on my cheek, it’s the wonders that I seek" PG-13 Buggy just wanted your birthday to go smoothly.

"So hold my hand, I’ll walk with you my dear" PG-13ish It’s the three year anniversary since everything changed in Buggy’s life for the worst.

"Yours are the sweetest eyes I’ve ever seen" PG-13 You decide to ask Buggy an important question but he has major doubts. "Close my eyes for a while Force from the world a patient smile" PG Buggy says something he regrets to his older sister.

"I don’t blame you for being you But you can’t blame me for hating it". PG. A prank goes wrong, punishment laid out, and an accidental first kiss all in one day for Buggy. (pt 1)

"And I’m just the boy who’s had too many chances" PG. You and Buggy are finding out that becoming a teenager is absolutely terrible. (pt 2, sequel to "I don't blame you")

NSFW One Shots MDNI!

"I’m aiming for full control of this love" NC-17. Buggy has a fantasy that you decide to try involving Mihawk and Sir Crocodile.

"Like lighting when I’m swimming in the sea" R. Buggy never made time for sex until he met you well into his 30’s.

"You’re the only thing I wanna touch" NC-17. Buggy only comes up for air every so often and it’s a beautiful sight.

"You’ve got to promise not to stop when I say when" NC-17. Buggy’s been a bit of a brat today and you’ve had enough. "The stroke of your fingers The scent of your lingers" NC-17. You meet Alvida and get a bit of a crush, and Buggy is a rather supportive boyfriend with that. "If my velocity starts to make you sweat Then just don’t let go" NC-17. Buggy asks to try something new and you’re onboard with it.

[genericpuff]

saw a post criticizing lore rekindled a while back, and one of the points made was "it's unfair to rachel that someone else can profit off and make money off her work"

do you profit off lore rekindled??? i don't remember if you ever said that you were monetizing lore rekindled, so i'm unsure where this piece of information came from

I literally do NOT profit off Rekindled in any way shape or form, it's a Tumblr comic that's free to read, zero subscriptions, paywalls, or ads.

I did just recently open a Patreon and apply my Twitch channel to become affiliate, but 1. my Patreon doesn't have any paid members yet , 2. my Patreon won't be offering rewards that limit the reading experience of Rekindled (it's gonna be like random doodles n junk), and 3. I haven't even streamed since I applied for Affiliate and people are watching the streams for art and lo-fi, not for any sort of exclusive reading experiences that wouldn't also be accessible on Tumblr (you just get to watch me slowly work on Rekindled while playing FF XIV LMAOO) All of these restrictions I have in place is to prevent exactly what folks assume or accuse me - profiting off Rachel's IP. At the end of the day I just wanna create an AU fanfic project, even if it's created out of disappointment for what could have been.

I *do* spend a few hundred a month though for my assistant. So I'm working on Rekindled completely at a loss, out of my own pocket. So in that regard, even if I were to monetize any part of Rekindled... it wouldn't be for my own profitable gain, I'd maybe be able to cover some of my assistant fees 🤣 (but that's just hypothetical food for thought, because as I said above, I don't want to monetize Rekindled because of the potentially legal and ethical issues in doing so. Making money is also just not why I'm making Rekindled because it's something I wanna just do for fun! Money complicates things, turns shit into a job :'0) And let's be real, in that hypothetical scenario, I don't think any money I could generate on my free to read Tumblr project would come anywhere close to threatening Rachel's bottom line 🤣

And this isn't to throw anyone under the bus but when people get suspicious of Rekindled profiting off LO, I can't help but think of the actual fans of LO selling handmade LO merch on Etsy and LO-style adoptables and other arts and crafts dedicated to their favorite comic. And I'm not gonna judge them for that, more power to 'em if people wanna buy their cool stuff (and some of it is really REALLY cool, like I wanna buy their stuff too LOL), I just think it's ironic that people separate the two because... I'm not a diehard fan? Or because Rekindled has gotten popular here. Beats me. All that "popularity" is still just a niche remake of a niche comic in a niche medium. It's not Spiderman Lotus levels of big 🤣 but I know it probably feels that big to people who are engaged with this fandom and spend a lot of time in it.

There's an opposite side of being a yes man that perpetuates similar behavior on the other side - when you come up with reasons to rag on someone just for the sake of it because you can't rationalize them NOT being the all 100% pulp of evil LMAO (and I see people do this even to Rachel and it's not fair imo, like people who use the Lolita thing as a way to accuse Rachel of being a legitimate pedophile? Like no, I don't think we should be normalizing serious accusations like that. I think she's just misinformed in a lot of ways at worst and suffering from dark romantasy porn brainrot at best LOL).

Like, as an example, I've also seen people claim stuff like I'm in the fan spaces telling people not to read LO and to read LR instead? Which like... why would I do that, LR isn't for the fans anyways and I don't gain anything by being a dick in their space 🤣 If my own readers are doing that, that's out of my hands (but respectfully don't do this please!!! there's a reason I don't use the standard LO hashtags and only stick to the anti ones!!!!) but again (and this is a big assumption so take with grains of salt) I think people just like to claim these things because they feel it's just naturally the right thing to do when someone who has opinions they don't like actually puts them into action. Because now they can't say shit like "well if you think you're so much smarter than Rachel why don't YOU write the story!" and "you don't know what it's like to manage a comic!" so they grapple onto whatever other argument they can even if it's misconstrued or entirely pulled out of thin air and not backed up with any legitimate evidence.

Their perspectives make sense to them. My perspective makes sense to me. I don't blame people for being suspicious when they see someone like me pour this much time and effort and money into a project like Rekindled, they assume it HAS to do with something they can rationalize from their own point of view, like wanting to "steal" Rachel's work or profit off it or take it for myself out of "jealousy".

Sorry to disappoint y'all with a boring answer, but I'm just someone who was once a huge fan of LO and couldn't let it go. I'm just someone who's way too hyperfixated, with a lot of passion for making comics and experience to match. I'd still be making it even if I didn't have an assistant. I'd still be making it even if I was stuck working with nothing but paper and pencil. Because I love making it and I love what it means to me, and I love that it makes other people feel the same way I do about it.

And that's really all I have to say on that.

[cios-correct-opinions]

@evilkaeya @aaabatteryy @starrynightarchive

see my other post about this here

to tl;dr this: when it comes to fandom and content creators, ppl tend to make content of the characters they already love and thus think about most often, which leads to, at times, male characters getting genderbent into women either thru cis or trans hcs, bc they are both genderbending, thats the definition of the term bc youre changing their gender, and getting mad at people for not, in your opinion, "appreciating" the female characters enough, is not doing anything except making people feel bad for not having the "correct" feelings about a character at best, or making them actively angry and thus fueling them to create more of that thing you hate out of spite at worst (for you anyway, not for the people who like it).

this doesnt mean they dont give a shit abt the other characters who arent their faves, but to create a work of art, you need to be able to like. care enough to do it. and that requires more care than just a general enjoyment or appreciation of a character, especially if the work in question is time intensive/would be time intensive, like writing a chapter fic/thousands of words long oneshot, or making a fully rendered piece of art, etc. obvi this will depend on the skill and energy levels of the artist we're talking about but yknow, on a general scale

op of this post blocked me so i cant respond directly on it but, for context

first of all: i'm not illiterate but i'm beginning to think some people on this post might be, given this response, because it is so clearly Not what i was talking about it's a little wild, actually!

also i hate to tell yall this, but the reason you don't often see people genderbending female characters to male anymore is bc of the spread of radfem ideology thru fandom spaces like wildfire. ppl genuinely lose their shit when ppl even have transmasc or trans man headcanons for characters assumedly cis female in the source material (which is genderbending btw. them being trans doesnt mean it isnt genderbending anymore you are still changing their gender thus it is genderbending thats the definition fellas) bc they fucking hate men and the idea of men existing

sorry not sorry but if you get mad at ppl who genderbend female characters into transmascs/trans men (transmascs aren't always genderbends, bc you can be transmasc and also a woman, but i digress/for the sake of brevity...) and go "you're TAKING AWAY a GOOD FEMALE CHARACTER!" i need you to stop for a second and consider why these people - most of whom are trans men/transmascs themselves - might be doing that to a character they like.

9/10 times when i see a cis genderbend of a male character to be female, the person doing it is a cis woman. when i see genderbends, of any kind, of a female character to be male or masc? it's almost always done by a trans man and/or a transmasc. and inevitably, they are almost always dogpiled for it with disgusting levels of hate. i've seen it happen so many times i stopped attempting to count a long time ago

don't come up here saying "you NEVER see-" because actually i see all of those things happen all the time. ppl love genderbending men characters into women, or emasculating/demasculinizing/feminizing them in order to make them personally more appealing, or saying "[mlm ship] would be better if it was two girls/wlw/two fem-aligned/etc" all the fucking time. and while i realize this is often a way for the people who say this to like, try to lash out at common misogynistic/lesbiphobic/transmisogynistic/etc sentiment irl, in doing so, they are not doing it in a way that allows for a nuanced understanding of their fellow fandom-goers. they make blanket sweeping statements and then dogpile people who disagree

the moment you start treating entire demographics of people as if they are a hivemind or a single identity, the moment you decide that something "never" happens bc you personally have not seen it? youve already lost any possible chance you mightve had at making a good point

[ciearcab]

I've been curious for a while now how you draw poses. How do you use references? Everything you make looks so natural but still lively it's so gorgeous

ghghfghn thankyou! i definitely feel like the worst person to ask for advice on this from, but i'll try and explain some of my thought process when working with character-focused art (and posing them!)

(rambling below the cut)

i think that understanding human form in general is probably the best way to feel confident in posing even if that sounds like what everyone says. when you feel familiar with the shapes of a body it's far easier to understand the rules in which they will move/interact with, and then composition in general tends to come a little easier.

When i start a pose (or just. character art in general) i like to try and work with the most bare-bones type sketch possible. I dont visualize things in my head very clearly, so when i do try and copy a reference or detailed sketch 1 to 1, it usually ends up incredibly stiff and boring because i get stuck following all the details. the way i break down shapes is a little off as well, i think in very angular and long lines, so i like to use the chest, knees, and shoulders as my "anchor points" for my figures - they're what i personally consider the most prominent points to focus on visually and i usually will build my pose around their placements. i think it’s good to come up with something like this to help ground your pose early on.

when i draw multiple characters interacting or in the same scene, i like to try and think of poses that feel in-character or natural to them. these two in my recent piece started out kinda cutesy but they argue a lot, so you can see the change as i readjusted the posing to make it feel more aggressive as i went along.

redoing a portion of a character midway through for whatever reason is pretty standard in my process, so i dont stress if i cant quite figure out a limb or perspective at first (this is when i will look for reference if i dont have one or take my own photos).

I dont really enjoy drawing characters just standing around, so doing something that feels more like a "scene" or moment of interaction like this (being scolded at for an injury, chatting, reading a book, catching a falling object, etc etc) is a nice way to try and come up with something at least a little more compelling to draw, and a way to work some body language into the poses too. legs and arms can make great space-fillers while still adding to the mood!

i dont really know how to wrap this up but as a general rule of thumb i try to think of poses that will fill the space of the canvas/image im drawing on, just like any other composition, while still considering the feeling or moment i want to convey. if i’m unhappy with the final full piece, i usually will just crop for a closer image (posting on other platforms usually makes me do this anyways, so i consider it part of the process at this point ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

[zee-has-commitment-issues]

Young Royals Characters as Short 'n' Sweet Songs

this post came to me in a dream but I can't not do it now, so buckle up. No audios for Please Please Please or Espresso because you know exactly which songs those are and you do not need the sample lol.

Taste - Simon

oh I leave quite an impression - In fact he does. you're wondering why half his clothes went missing, my body's where they're at - shout out Simon wearing Wilhelm's blue/green sweater in season 3, shout out the stolen orange sweater in season 2. you'll just have to taste me when he's kissing you - that whole thing where Wilhelm literally told Felice he kissed her to see if it was like kissing Simon. I've been there, done that once or twice - he in fact broke up and got back together with Wilhelm five times.

Please, Please, Please - Sara

Whatever devil's inside you, don't let him out tonight - she in fact dated the worst person on the planet. And please, pleasе, please, Don't bring me to tеars when I just did my makeup so nice - it's giving the valentines dance, it's giving the shooting range scene, it's giving the third year's dinner. I beg you, don't embarrass me, motherfucker - Sara, I'm gonna hold your hand when I say this... And we could live so happily if no one knows that you're with me - they kept their relationship a secret for a reason and she had the common sense to think twice about going public at the valentines ball.

Good Graces - Wilhelm

I won't give a fuck about you - Wilhelm doesn't give a fuck about anyone but Simon When I love you, I'm sweet like an angel - he is in fact the most bashful little guy around his boyfriend. Boy, it's not that complicated, you should stay in my good graces - we have many examples of why that is a good idea, see the difference between how he treats Felice and how he treats August 'Cause no one's more amazin' at turnin' lovin' into hatred - every single member of his family feels this line on a personal level.

Sharpest Tool - Felice

I know you're not the sharpest tool in the shed, we had sex, I met your best friends then a bird flies by and you forget - remember that brief relationship with August? Yeah... that. we were goin' right, then you took a left, left me with a lot of shit to second-guess - she thinks about Sara when she hears this line. You know it, I know it, her friends know it, the bus driver knows it. Everyone knows. Seems like overnight, I'm just the bitch you hate now - literally how everyone treated her after those Wilhelm rumors went around. Or when the school got shut down and for some reason everyone blamed her? Fuck everyone else leave Felice alone.

Coincidence - Marcus (stop booing I'm right)

Now her name comes up once, then it comes up twice -Marcus was in fact the one to bring up Wilhelm's name both once and twice. Last week, you didn't have any doubts, this week, you're holdin' space for her tongue in your mouth - Did someone say Valentines Ball? No? Just me? What a surprise, your phone just died, your car drove itself from L.A. to [his] thighs - lmao Simon claimed his phone died multiple times in order to dodge Marcus. To the point that Marcus went to Rosh and Ayub who then had to pretend they didn't know Simon was going to hook up with his ex. Oh wow, you just broke up again - oh I just know Marcus felt vindicated when Wilmon kept being on again off again after that 💀

Bed Chem - Wilmon (need I explain? No, but I'm going to anyway)

got me scrollin' like out of breath - Wilhelm stalking Simon's instagram... How you pick me up, pull 'em down, turn me 'round oh, it just makes sense - Simon in the hallway scene fr How you talk so sweet when you're doin' bad things - throwback to when Wilhelm dropped like a whole poem full of metaphors over the phone to Simon while high out of his mind. Where art thou? Why not uponeth me? - literally Simon at any given time. that boy is feral.

Espresso - Fredrika (could be Simon too but I'm trying not to repeat)

I can't relate to desperation - Season 2 Fredrika for sure. Season 3 Fredrika took that statement back. And I got this one boy and he won't stop calling - that "one boy" is actually Stella and her poem. he looks so cute wrapped 'round my finger - again, "he" is just Stella staring at her from across the room. My twisted humor make him laugh so often - throwback to when she stated she would be the surrogate for wilmon's royal baby.

Dumb and Poetic - Wilmon (I know I just said I wasn't going to repeat but this is my blog so sue me)

You're so dumb and poetic, it's just what I fall for, I like the aesthetic - Wilhelm and Simon are in fact both dumb and poetic. Both of them. Shoutout football field scene, shoutout Simon's song, shout out the Jubilee speech, shoutout Wille's song. You're so sad there's no communication, but, baby, you put us in this situation - every single music room scene in which they fight about something that could have been avoided by a singular conversation. Just 'cause you act like one doesn't make you a man - because they're not men. They're teenage boys and literally everyone in their lives just decided to forget that for some reason.

Slim Pickins - Nils (also Felice but I'm trying not to repeat)

Guess I'll end this life alone, I am not dramatic, these are just the thoughts that pass right through me - Nils is actually very dramatic, but he also probably thought this many times while he was in the closet. All the douchebags in my phone - in his grindr era Oh, it's slim pickings, if I can't have the one I love I guess it's you that I'll be kissin' - .... *cough* Vincent *cough* I'll just keep on moanin' and bitchin' - Nils 24/7 is bitching about something. He can't not complain about something. "Good job on coming out but it was dumb" BITCH JUST SAY YOU'RE PROUD FOR ONCE.

Juno - Stella

You make me wanna make you fall in love - good old fashioned pop love song seems fitting for Stella. Especially this line, because she is absolutely trying her damnedest to make Fredrika fall in love. late at night, I'm thinking 'bout you - "I scream your name every day, I whisper your name every night" - a real, canonical thing Stella wrote about Fredrika. Can't help mysеlf, hormones are high - that time she danced with Rosh and then pulled a 180 like a month later?

Lie To Girls - literally any girl in this entire fucking show

I'll go for lyrical examples to, but literally every girl in this show was treated so bad. The moms, the main girls, the side girls, the extra girls. Like, some of them were bad people, but they were still treated so bad.

No, don't say it was just an isolated incident that happened once - Felice when August tried to get back at her by kissing her best friend, then going on to date that best friend, and take that best friend's virginity. I've never seen an ugly truth that I can't bend - Sara looking at August. We love to read the cold, hard facts and swear they're incorrect - Linda. We love to mistake butterflies for cardiac arrest - Kristina. Girls will cry and girls will lie and girls will do it 'til they die for you - Stella, Fredrika, Madison, the background older girls, Sara, Felice, August's mom, Felice's mom, Kristina and Linda, the Headmistress, the replacement headmistress. I could go on. I won't, but I could.

Don't Smile - August

Don't smile because it happened, baby, cry because it's over - he cried a lot when he realized it was over with Sara. I think I counted him crying like six times in season three alone. My heart is heavy now, it's like a hundred pounds - and now he also has the weight of the monarchy on his shoulders.

__

So.... that was that. Let me know if you want me to do other albums like this lmao. I don't know why I thought of this.

[princesstarfire1234]

I saw your RMA Post but before i ask, first i love your artstyle its so beautiful and each time i see it, it makes my day :] and second what are your thoughts of S2 part 1 and 2? And if you can rewrite it what will it be?

Aha hello!! I didn't think that RMA post would actually catch any eyes but I'm it did!!

First off, thank you so much! It's the best feeling ever knowing my art can make people happy just like that :]]

As for your question, I recently just rewatched a good chunk of S2 Part 2 but some of the details around the later bits are still fuzzy (rewatching em is quite hard for me as the english dubs aren't exactly that easy to find out there unfortunately)

I will say though, rewatching it really opened my eyes to just how much of a downgrade Part2 is compared to S1 and even just S2 Part1 itself, not just in story but in like the voice acting and animation. The voice direction is a bit off, characters sound flat, and the animation just feels... weirder, if that makes sense. It's not the worst thing in the world though, it's just an unfortunate thing I happen to notice. They also changed some of the VAs I think (liek Rema's) which was a strange decision but alright ig... There's also the reusing of so many games instead of new ones but oh well... Despite all my problems with it though, I like the inclusion of the new characters (Manus and all the other Leos Valiants). The Leos are all such silly guys :]] I do wish the DV7s got more screentime and played a bigger role though, the first episode for part2 really fooled me into thinking they would lmaoo

S2 Part1 still holds up, certainly not as good as S1 but still, it's got charm! I love the setting actually, Old City is such a bright and colorful place with like all these abstract and messed up winding pathways, it's so weird and funkyy, I dig it a lot!

So pretty!! God... just like how funky the cities look with all of them being like giant floating islands, it will always be cool af to me

Ik most of my followers don't care about runningman much but in the off chance some non-rma fan sees this, look at Tree City (pic below), I love it so much

Although... sometimes it really does feel like Season 2 is where the studio decided to lean more into it being a children's show. It's a lot less "dark" compared to S1 which is a tad disappointing. Like just compare Akong's battle (where the dude literally uses a bunch of the old guys to power up his thingy 😭) compared to CG's big mech fight. Still, I liked it! I like the neat guardians (the lil pullulu spirits who guard the gate, Vivace and Ensemble twins my beloved <3).

ALSO ALSO THE IRON BEAST, I can always appreciate a big robot guy aha

That's all I really got for the ramble aha, I'd say more stuff about S2 and maybe my views on it will change overtime but as of now, I haven't even really gotten around to properly finishing it yet. I remember watching it waaayyy back but it was all in korean with zero subtitles 😭 luckily, I am in a server with people sharing english versions so I'll probably watch those when I get more free time!

I really just miss talking about this show really and I feel like I've largely outgrown the fandom in old spaces where I used to talk in (like Facebook groups and Amino lmfaoo), so it's absolutely awesome to find RMA fans over here on tumblr!

[twotimeracewinnerlandonorris]

here are all twelve fics and one art that the wonderful participants of the winter break fic exchange in the carlando server made and posted.

i want to thank @boohowdy and @ruffboisebvettel for helping me with the planning and execution of this, for the cheerleading and for always being available for anyone who had any questions.

huge thanks to everyone who participated. thank you for putting your hearts and souls into your work; thank you for always being there for each other, and thank you for allowing us to share in your multitude of talents and creativity. you are all amazing people, and the carlando server is lucky to have you all.

*

watch this space, I'm open to falling from grace by tiredtiredsharl (@wolfiemcwolferson)

Summary: Lando is used to not seeing the people who live in the building. He comes and goes at odd hours and he uses the laundry room on his days off in the middle of the day and he checks his mail at 3:30 in the morning, so it’s more weird to him that he runs into Carlos twice in a five day period. He had started to think that he maybe made it up - got dosed at the bar or had a vivid dream about a man who was every single fantasy he’s ever had - tall and broad and hair and hands and lips.

Someone new moves into 4B and nothing is as it seems.

*

are you a future or a fairytale – am i naive or is this real by Missha (Mishtique) (@mish-tique)

Summary: It takes Lando a few semesters before he finally settles for studying photography at an international university. He hopes that this is the time when he finally settles and turns out to be happy studying – his parents just pray that he won’t change his mind again. They want him to settle down, find a nice person and become stable.

He just wants to be happy and live his own life without having people trying to micromanage it.

His sudden decision to also rent a room on campus comes with a surprise in the form of a Spanish, older, and-blessed-with-visuals-shaped-by-the-gods Alpha.

Carlos Sainz Jr is both the best and the worst thing that could happen to him during his first year in uni. Especially when the alpha keeps walking in on him wearing his, his – pretty clothes.

Or: 5 times Carlos catches Lando with something special + 1 time Lando wears something special for Carlos.

*

i love you forever, not maybe (you’re my one true love) by csjr (@boohowdy)

Summary: Lando is starting to suspect that off-camera, he’s quite the soft and gentle guy. What did he say once in an interview? He protects love? I’d love to be protected, Lando thinks.

or: the one where Lando is a student, Carlos is a F1 driver, and they go through a lot before they get their happy ending

*

Twin Flame by Phebes (@phebess)

Summary: 98% of people know exactly when they've met their soulmate. 2% do not.

or: the soulmate slow burn that nobody asked for

*

All The World Wondered 🔒 by biscuitydenim

Summary: Crimean War AU

*

Pull Everything to Pieces by kolyarostov (@landinrris)

Summary: Daniel’s here because he left classified documents on a train for someone to find (and find them they did). Max is here because he was in charge of tailing a suspect who was dealing illegal firearms and lost track of them (and thus the guns that were eventually found at the scenes of various crimes). Pierre’s here because he royally fucked up a diplomatic meeting with the French ambassador (Carlos thinks it was probably accidental nudes). Carlos is pretty sure Nico’s here because no one actually likes him. What he doesn’t truly know is why Lando’s here— but it can’t be good.

Or: Carlos gets sent to the bottom of the MI5 ladder after a training fiasco, and he'll do anything to make up for it.

*

That’s what happens in the movies, anyways 🔒 by Belzebubcat (@waddlingpenguin)

Summary: Lando isn’t sure what he expects. Maybe he thought Carlos would kiss him or- or say it back. That’s what happens in the movies, anyways. He leans in, eyes on Carlos and presses a kiss to the corner of his mouth.

Carlos doesn't respond.

There are no fireworks.

No string quartet playing in the background.

It’s nothing like what happens in the movies.

*

Those Lazy-Hazy-Crazy Days of Summer (With You) 🔒 by Toasted_Teacake (@the-toasted-teacake)

Summary: Carlos invites Lando to spend a few days at the Sainz villa under the guise of golf. Lando thinks he might finally be ready to fall.

*

it's the heart that really matters in the end 🔒 by LucysFault (@ruffboisebvettel)

Summary: So here Lando is, completing one step of the journey alongside his son, and a family somewhere out there are on the same path but just starting out. It’s like Candyland in his mind. They’re moving over the finish line while the other family have just had their piece placed on the board.

Or, Lando and Carlos meet in a hospital cafe, Daniel and Charles are their kids, and some springs are worth waiting for.

*

Impractical Magic by goldenboygate (@goldenboygate)

Summary: Charles and Lando were born into a family where falling in love means you end up dead. They take different paths in life, Charles wanting nothing more in life than to feel the exhilaration love brings, and Lando too afraid to ever put himself out there.

When Charles gets into trouble with one of his boyfriends, Lando must figure out how to help him while trying his best not to fall in love with the one man who can take his life apart, Detective Carlos Sainz.

*

Take My Breath Away by kabutocat (@foo1ishheart554)

Summary: Art. Lando and Carlos as Maverick and Iceman from the original Top Gun.

*

take my sweater with the loose threads by sadcornyfuck (@enjoythebutterflies)

Summary: Carlos is a patient man, waiting his entire life for a moment like this.

*

Te amo - I love you 🔒 by NamarieCarlando (@jolandax13)

Summary: Carlos and Lando are roommates. And in love. They just don’t know the other feels the same. But when Landos suppressants run out and he goes into heat, their feelings are finally revealed.

[ask-afoxesshadow]

you know what an ask blog is, why else are you here.

I wont be starting with character fluff, ill put that at the end, so read it if you want a visual understanding of who your talking to and how they will talking.

Warnings

I am an adult [by definition], and since i have little knowledge on who is on the other side of the screen, this space will be treated as an adult area. posts are subject to include the following:

suggestive descriptions and intimate innuendos

descriptions of violent acts or bloodshed

blunt and brutal honesty, because patience and kindness is a resource i spend at my discretion

scariest of all, many posts will contain the horror that is "roleplay"

excessive sarcasm

"Rules"

asks that are directly nsfw in any form [sexual, graphic or otherwise] will be ignored, so don't even bother

generally speaking, if you are blatantly disrespectful to any particular group of people, you will be ignored at best, blocked at worst.

asks that attempt to get the character to enter a relationship with any other reoccurring character will similarly be ignored

new "rules" will be added at mod discretion, if and when i see fit.

Notes

the person who runs this blog, me, has almost no idea how to properly format tumblr posts, neither do i care to learn, so everything will be done on a whim

additionally i have a total of 0 (zero) art skills, so the only picture that will be shown, unless someone else with free time and an interest in this character and decides to make art [which would be awesome], is the picture used as the blogs icon, the mask seen in which is from here.

all of this is done for fun and to entertain the person behind the screen, do note take anything here too seriously, because i sure am not

i have decided I'll go by "tome" as how you talk to the mod directly. why? because like a tome, i have an ungodly amount of knowledge regarding what is happening in this group of ask blogs, so it felt fitting

Character/roleplay information

the shadow will speak with basic text, while occasionally having changes to their text to show things such as emphasis, or acts such as whispering/speaking under their breath, and to indirectly refer to another person through the use of color and emboldening.

-the characters actions are depicted through use of text surrounded by hyphens, shown here-

[mod talk, from i, the guy who made this blog, is contained within square brackets]

(context, narration, and important notices are contained within parenthesis)

reoccurring characters can be found in the 'following' section, please treat their mods with respect.

The "residence" of the shadow is similar in nature to that of Clauneck or Chemach's, allowing them to hide in plain sight, or let those they wish find them with ease. the area itself is decorated in a style foreign to the area. [think the decorations found in the pilgrim pack]

can, and will, do things anonymously, a man's got to keep their image straight you know?

Character description

the shadow is a creature who's form is crafted from a pitch black substance that seems to hover around the sublimation point, often times acting more akin to a gas than a solid, seemingly at the will of the shadow itself.

standing around 6'1", they have no obvious gender, with all features being vague and hard to identify, or exceptionally androgynous, additionally having a pair of pointed canid ears sprouting from the top of their head, and several large fox tails trailing out behind them. [for visual aid, think any media depiction of a nine tailed kitsune.]

their attire is made mostly of muted colors and dark tones, similarly to their shadowed form. covering their face, they don a handcrafted mask made to resemble a red fox, despite their other canid features suggesting them to be one. covering their upper body is a large and baggy grey shirt with torn hems, a deep blue cloak further covering their form, with a light grey scruff, held in place by a broach depicting a red flower with five petals, white semi circles between the petals of the flower, all encircled by a ring of gold. their arms seem to have a bright red string wrapped around them, looking very out of place among the rest of their muted clothes. the attire for their lower body is rough and simple, consisting of a pair of baggy red pants, with several roughly sewn patches made from fabrics of various materials and colors, and a simple pair of black boots.

Final notes

this character exists for the soul purpose of interacting with ask blogs revolving around the game "cult of the lamb" [but if your here you probably already knew that], so while some of the statements of the character might break the fourth wall in the context of the game, that wall has already been removed by the other blogs, so i care not about its existence

the flower depicted on the brooch is not a Camellia, neither is the character a follower of any of the bishops.

[shiniganja]

Tw/cw for death and mentions of suicide

Hey guys, it is with a heavy heart and unlike my usual gushing and happy disposition that I say that I'm going to be stepping away from the Internet for a while. I've always been a bright and happy person but this will be open, raw, and visceral. Feel free to scroll past if this bothers you.

It is officially June. Michael would've been 31 years old this month and July will be one whole year after I got the worst news of my life. Not going to lie, I had this all rehearsed and planned out- what I would say to billions of strangers and whoever the fuck sees this post, but the truth is I genuinely don't know what to say other than I am severely hurting and I need to be alone. I've been thinking about this for a while and I think it's for the best. I know this probably seems like it's coming out of no where considering how I just reblogged some cute art of my comfort character and then I turn around and post this but please understand that Mike's suicide has actively retraumatized me and led to a diagnosis of bpd. What I'm trying to say here is that my mental state is incredibly fragile and unpredictable and will sometimes go from "wow! I love this character" to sitting in silence and asking "God" why my soulmate had to shoot himself. Basically - I am actively falling apart. This year has been a literal hell. I've struggled to pay bills, I'm grateful my job hasn't fired me due to my horrible attendance, and I've (unintentionally) distanced myself from my friends just because, if I'm being brutally honest, I am not mentally equipped to cope with something like this; and that is the reality of suicide, it changes people. It has been a year. I don't even feel like myself anymore. The person in the mirror doesn't look like me anymore - they're just a husk. I am not happy with nor do I like myself because my grief is actively destroying me and I'm trying to keep it together the best I can. And that's another thing: coping. The spaces and fandoms I used to find comfort in have been feeling me with stress and paranoia lately and causing more harm than good, so I think distancing myself from these spaces until I can see things that damage me personally and are heartbreaking (it isn't anyone's fault and is extremely difficult to explain without getting into the trauma of Mike's death) without going into a full-on manic borderline personality disorder episode.

Do not worry about me, please. I understand what I've said above can be concerning but I am in no danger of hurting myself, I promise. I will be safe and living my life with my daki and if you ever are concerned you can always reach out to me on here or discord.

TLDR: Someone I loved shot themself around this time and I have been struggling this year and am not handling the anniversary of it well. I need to just be alone with my comfort character for a while because he is my main coping mechanism. I am safe.

Be kind to others. Respect yourselves and nature.

- shini

[kataraslove]

are we allowed to submit/suggest old kataang fanart for the archive?

you definitely can if it’s on tumblr. i’ll just reblog the post. please make sure to include a link if you’re sending it as an ask.

if it’s on a different website, like Instagram or twitter, i’ll have to ask the artist first and/or see what their reposting policies are.

deviantart, reddit, pixiv (or any other site besides tumblr, twitter, and instagram) will be extremely tricky for me to ask for artist permission because i don’t have accounts on there (reddit is just for personal use) and don’t intend on making any new accounts. same thing applies for works of inactive artists. i’ll try my best to do some investigating to find their new accounts, if there aren’t any clear reposting policies.

in the event that i absolutely cannot get a hold of an artist, worst case scenario, i’ll just post a link to their fanart. if you guys want to contact the artist and ask for permission for the archive to repost, that would be awesome. please also dm a ss of your conversation with the artist so i can know for sure.

i also think this would be a great time to highlight some ground zero rules when suggesting fanart:

no whitewashed art: what does whitewashed art look like? any art where katara is the same exact shade as aang (both light as hell) and/or she looks like katherine in shyamalan’s movie.

no art depicting katara and aang as racist caricatures or tropes: luckily i haven’t seen any of that tomfoolery in kataang spaces (but i have in fandom spaces involving another very popular ship of katara’s) but i’m sure it exists somewhere out there.

no art involving zutara: who the hell wants to see zutara art in a kataang fanart archive? i know i don’t. if zutaraang is your thing there’s other spaces out there besides this one. with that being said, you can of course submit art from zutara artists who draw kataang. other ships that don’t include katara and aang - like korrasami, rangshi, zukka, sukka, maiko, kainora, etc - are all completely fine and will be tagged, so long as kataang is in the fanart (doesn’t have to be the main focus, can be the background).

no live action fanart: no hate to the actors involved - i’m just really not a fan of anyone’s live action casting, especially some of the water tribe characters. plus i hate the concept of a live action to begin with.

sorry for the long-winded answer! you can absolutely submit anything via a link, but whether it gets posted will really determine on my ability to access the artist and on whether the art follows those rules above. i’d love to post as much fanart as possible, but as everything else, there also definitely needs to be a process in place.

[a-wilson-collector]

I LIVED BITCH

(cw: noncon/rape, guns, disregard for gun safety, family abuse, forced isolation, medical neglect)

wanted to save this post for until i got to a safe place, but now that i am, i can give y'all a reason why i didn't post much if at all.

its mostly because of my family.

on a scale from 1-10 (10 being the worst, 1 being the best) my mom and dad are 10, most of my dad's side of the family is like, 9.5 outside of grandma n pa. they are like an 8 or 7 depending on how pissy/petty i feel about them. my brother is like, 4. and my sister is the only one whose normal about everything so she's a 1.

the reason my mom n dad are so highly rated is because my mom would lowkey ghost me for the entire summer when school stopped, and my dad is, well, according to mom- "he never takes no as an answer."

makes me think about why i always gravitated towards noncon fanfics for wilson/maxwell. Im still working on that.

grandma n pa are 8 because my grandma defends my dad (and pretty much any violent male member of the family) and my grandpa WAVED A FUCKING LOADED GUN IN MY FACE on the day of the move. if his hand was NOT on the trigger, he could've shot me in any part of my body including my head

my brother is a 4 because he hasn't apologized for beating the shit out of me almost every day until i was 16, but he's gotten a lot better at controlling his anger.

my sister was the only one who realized that the only way she was going to stay in my life was being cautious, but also realizing why i wanted out so bad, since she went through most of this herself.

outside of that, i hid most of my art from my family because i could NOT handle the disappointment that my family would show if that their "adorable daughter" drew a guy ripping his face off, or drawing porn (tho that wasnt until years later, obviously.) thats why most of my art is violent or violent in nature. its what i grew up in. constant fights all the time. cps was called a few times but they didnt do anything outside of adding to the trauma pile

im tired and finally in a safe environment where i wont be threatened to be shipped off my dad's place, which, if that was to happen... I'd lose all of my support network, including doctors and psychiatrists. I'd be completely shut off from the outside world, including my boyfriend and friends on discord. in his mind, the internet is the reason i have such high needs, instead of, y'know, THE 'TISM.

as for my past, i have gone by "noonfish" or some variation of that on tumblr, but that was while i was stuck somewhere in the alt-right rabbit hole on yt since most of my family loves trump, which is why i nuked all of them. I am deeply ashamed of my past and i'm still working on it, i know i can be better tomorrow than i was today. If i had a nickel for every time my grandma defended a rapist, I'd have three nickels, which isnt a lot but its weird it happened with three people.

i understand if people also stop following for my previous "ties" to the alt right (i was pretty surface level, mainly memes), however i was like, what, 16? and extremely isolated to boot. Thank fuck i got anti-psychotics. i was losing my mind for YEARS due to undiagnosed schizo-affective disorder, which was in play since i was 8. I still remember the time i missed my bus going home from school in elementary school, and when my mom had me in the car, she drove into a parking space and proceeded to yell at me to stop telling the teachers because "i was scaring them" because i kept seeing shadow people in the hallways. all the doctors just assumed I was being racist or something? im not sure about that but the only thing that came out of that was me getting glasses (which, tbh i did in fact, need)

after that, it went lowkey until middle/high school, where it resurfaced again and will continue until i fucking die, so thats fun. if I didn't have schizo-affective disorder, i probably still would've fallen for the alt-right pipeline on yt when i was a child (because of unsupervised access to the internet), but at least i'd be able to make a coherent statement about it. i still hate all those people that helped make my mental illness worse to the point i thought only ohio existed for like, 6 months. shit was awful.

so yeah, thats why i've been so on n off. hope to get some art soon since its about time i should do a full render. maybe it will be two girls kissing.

[nokingsonlyfooles]

Dear Academia, I guess you can die mad about the curtains, if it bothers you that much...?

Wow, I just watched... Wow.

(I didn't really just watch it. I saved this and sat on it to see if I cooled off and decided I was being too mean. Since then, I've tripped over another essay where someone ripped into a work because they didn't understand it well enough to see the curtains at all, and I didn't like that either. I've decided to post this, so later I can post my reaction to the other one like a matching bookend!)

I made you a graphic about it!

So, I just watched my High School AP English teacher transcend time and space, possess the body of an a YouTuber, and try to drag me for quitting my English major due to being sick of dissecting the work of other writers until it dies.

Also, they put text up on the screen that I was supposed to read, over a decorative text background, and if I could pull money out of their Patreon, much like Mark Twain with the collection plate, I would've taken a nickel. For spite.

So, I guess I'm gonna talk about the blue curtains?

First of all, don't go looking for the video to drag this person. At worst, they are a little self-important and over-emotional. At best, their brain got shredded by the same process mine rejected and they are recovering. Be kind. I don't wanna hurt them, I'm trying to fire over their head. And take this with a grain of silly.

This is the meme. I couldn't find the original, uncensored version, and I don't care all that much, so here ya go.

One of YTer's friends referenced this meme, and it offended their intelligence and ability to critique art. Instead of having a more typical reaction, like thinking, "Ah, yes, you are only expressing your frustration with the school system's unreasonable expectations. As a fellow sufferer, I shall express my solidarity, and henceforth we shall share a sensible chuckle," and then chuckling sensibly, they telegraphed their offence to a slur on Art itself and wrote an essay. Of course, it is Capitalism's fault.

Now, Capitalism is most definitely tearing up the school system and inflicting lasting trauma on everyone involved and hurting Art. There is a lot of meat to be had on this bone. I would've left money in the collection plate for an engaging essay on that!

What I got was: "Art exists for you to tear it to pieces and squeeze every last instance of poetic meaning out of it, like you're hucking an orange into a juicer, and if you don't do that, you're dumb. Capitalism has made you dumb, because your dumbness is more profitable. I, on the other hand, huck Art into the juicer that is my brain, as one should, because I'm smart. The curtains are never blue. Fight the Power."

And right away, I thought: Oh, Mrs. Hillburn, I know this is how you enjoy Art. I know you really love it. You full-body crashed into a filing cabinet while explaining the Canterbury Tales to us, so I know you really do love "close reading" and want to share your joy. You're allowed to do that! God love you! But sometimes the curtains are blue.

And that wouldn't be a problem - except your job is to judge everyone on their ability, not only to interpret the curtains as something other than blue, but also to cough up a "valid" interpretation. And your judgment will affect whether they can get a job that pays them enough money to live. Now, you are free to do that. When I write things, I give them to the world! But, I'm not doing that to help you sort the children into an appropriate pay grade by demanding that they enjoy my work in the same way you do. Why would I do that? That makes no fucking sense.

I am saying this as someone writing a long-ass story that has a lot to do with objects being a certain colour and numbers adding up to a certain sum. That's there for you if you want it! Pink things are safe, orange things are hazardous, yellow means despair, and green-and-orange together is something unpleasant, because Erik doesn't like carrots and the whole world revolves around him. (Don't tell him, he'll be very upset. The world is terrible.) Do I need you to get that in order to understand my work and be "smart"? Fuck no. It's an Easter Egg. Also, it amuses me. Sometimes you need to know the number or the colour for your immersion, so I generate one in a way that has meaning for me.

There is shit in that story that I know you'll never get, because I based it off shit I wrote as a teenager that you'll never read. (It was terrible. I fixed it. I think.) This is my own personal "Glass Onion" (the song, not so much the movie). I am not obliged to imbue everything with a meaning for you to find. I'm not secretly trying to tell you Paul is dead! I'm just a human being with a sense of humour who gets bored - and sloppy and confused too.

So maybe the curtains are blue because I'm cribbing the setting off this motel room I stayed at one time and the curtains were blue. Maybe I'm saying "Hi" to my dog. Or the Blue's Clues dog. Maybe, god help us, there were actual blue curtains at the time and place I set my story and you'd see them if you found a photo. But I'm not gonna tell you if it doesn't matter. And it's not your job to make it matter if you don't get it. You can still pick up what I'm laying down. And, dammit, if you spend too much time wrapped up in the curtains, you might miss the rest of it.

There seems to be some idea that Art is hard and artists (at least #Real_Artists) must be something more than human to do it. Oh. My. God. Literally! You created this thing? Everything is there because you put it there? Everything that exists here is a thought-child you birthed from your brain like Athena? With intent? I enjoy it so much! It feels so real! How do you DO that? And, for fuck's sake, it's the same way you make a yummy sandwich or pick out a ripe melon or trim the cat's nails without getting a wound that needs stitches. You decide you want to, and you keep at it until you get good at it. You don't need to ask permission or pay a fee. The world is a classroom. Go learn. Keep trying until you figure out a way that works for you, or you decide you'd rather learn something else - and then go learn that instead.

The pedestal is very flattering, but nobody belongs up here. The very idea of a pedestal is preventing people from picking up a tool and making a thing. Can you, a mere mortal, really create a new reality from scratch, where everything is intentional and full of meaning? FUCK no! Nobody can do that! Sometimes I am lovingly imbuing every facet of my creation with meaning, and sometimes I go, "I need something there. Huh. That looks good." This is where platypuses come from! And I love them! If you don't love a platypus, WTF is wrong with you?

See??

Look, Creationism has no place in our schools. Natural selection is a thing. If I'm drawing on a real experience that involved blue or blue curtains, you may get some blue curtains. That is a real thing that happens all the time. It's not fair to torpedo someone's earning potential because, wherever you're coming from, blue makes you feel sad. You shouldn't be in a position to do that, that is not a job that needs doing.

*sigh* And, I will let you in on a dirty little secret. Sometimes I drop a stitch when I'm working, and I notice it later, and I realize I can hook that thing and make something look really cool and intentional. But it wasn't. It's there because I needed something there and it looked good. Ah, but as I've been writing, I've generated a reason for it to be there, and I now I have an opportunity to grab that sucker. I have picked up some amazing dropped stitches. I'm thinking of one in particular, a long series of dropped stitches, and when I was able to pick them all up in one swoop, I pretty much leapt up and screamed, "THE UNIVERSE IS A HOLOGRAM! I LIVE IN THE MATRIX! SOMEBODY PUT THIS HERE AND I KNOW IT WASN'T ME!" (I haven't published it yet, it's gonna be a while.) Be that as it may, you live in the Matrix with me, and the Architect might leave something like that for you too. It's not 'cos I'm doing it on purpose.

If everything must have a purpose and you're not allowed to enjoy the work unless you find every last one like it's Wally/Waldo, you may find that you've lost some of the gestalt, and the virtuosity, and the feeling. That's what started happening to me when I went to college to "learn about literature." There was value in that. Comp. Lit. was fantastic! But, they are trying to sort you into an appropriate pay grade (mine is "Institutionalized and/or Housewife") , and they must judge something. The amount of Waldos you've found is quantifiable! And so, the academic need to huck Art into a juicer also has a basis in Capitalism. Man, that shit gets everywhere.

If you love it, like Mrs. Hillburn, go for it. We see you, and we leave things for you to find, like the dev team hides gag gifts in Dracula's castle for the completionists. But if it sucks all the life out of the work and makes it a joyless slog, like it did for me - stop. Please. Or go rip up some other artist's work that's already been sacrificed for the purpose and analyzed to death. It's almost impossible to read The Great Gatsby for its own sake anymore. Even if you're out of school, you're still gonna remember finding the Waldos and tick all the boxes every time. I hope like hell going into the Public Domain can fix that.

I will finish with a tortured metaphor, because that's what I do. That's fun for me. Let's say I'm God. (Because I am. Did I say "simile"? Right. I'm God and your prayers are keeping Me up at night. Cut that out.) I've made this frog*!

I made him because I love making things - and because I love making things, I made a lot of things, and I think I'm pretty good at that. But it's no fun for Me if I don't get to share him with someone who can love him just as much as I do - for whatever reasons of their own. Adam! Look! Look at the frog I made!

Yes, Adam, you can play with him however you like! Isn't it neat how everything about him fits together? See his little toesies? If you rub his tummy, his little legs kick. Ha. Uh, you might be stressing him out a little, there, Adam. But that's okay! I made him for you to LOVE and...

Adam, what are you doing with the scissors?

Ah. Well, yes. Yes. The insides of things are very interesting. Yes, everything about him fits together. Yes, if you hook him up to a battery, his little legs kick. Ah, but he's dead. You do know that you've killed him, right? OK. Well, look, if you really want to understand how frogs work that badly, I don't mind if you cut one up...

Or two...

ADAM, THAT IS NOT WHAT FROGS ARE FOR! I want them to LIVE, I...

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No, if that's how you want to play with the frogs, I guess...

ADAM. WHY ARE YOU CREATING AN INSTITUTION THAT TEACHES ALL YOUR CHILDREN THAT'S WHAT FROGS ARE FOR?

What? No! Don't... Don't PUNISH them for refusing to cut up the frogs, WTF is WRONG with you? No, no, of course they must engage with the frogs to understand them - I DO want all of you to understand them! Please don't ever think I don't! - but there's a LIMIT to... No, of course I still love you, but you don't have to...

If you do that to every frog you see, there will not be any more frogs, are you hearing me? I WILL STOP MAKING THEM OUT OF SPITE.

*sigh* No. Of course I won't actually stop making frogs, but... Can we at least come to an understanding that sometimes the curtains are blue?

*I know it's a toad. I needed a Public Domain image of a frog cupped lovingly in human hands, and the best image on the first page happened to involve a toad. Paul lives (as of this writing), and the platypus exists because I thought it looked cool. Now put down the onion and go analyze something else.