#spoiler: dean's not actually dead

[purpleelephantsocks]

I just find it so funny at the beginning of season 13, when Mary and Cas were both presumed dead we went from

Dean (without Cas): Everything sucks and nothing matters. The world has lost all meaning. Give me any excuse to die and I will take it.

To

Dean (with Cas): I am just a happy little guy. An optimistic little dude. Anything is possible with the right attitude *walking on sunshine playing in the background* :D :D :D

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

Leon Day

Summary: The reader makes Dean breakfast on Leon Day and explains what the day is. While she has some fun things planned, Dean shares some of his own future plans with her...

Pairing: Dean x reader

Word Count: 1,000ish

Warnings: language, 15x20 finale spoiler (fic takes place post 15x20 though)

A/N: Enjoy!

_______

“Y/N,” said Dean, scratching his head when he came into the kitchen for breakfast. “I haven’t been in a coma lately right?”

“No...why would you ask that?” you said. Dean pointed behind him to the string lights hanging in the hall, colorful lights twinkling along the wall. “Oh that? It’s Leon day.”

“Who’s Leon?” he asked, padding over to his usual stool, yawning and curling into himself. You ruffled his hair and slid a cup of coffee in front of him.

“It’s June 25th. Exactly six months from Christmas,” you said.

“Is it Leon’s birthday?” he asked. “Whoever he is?”

“No silly,” you said, returning your attention to making pancakes.

“Can I have chocolate chips?” he asked. “Please.”

“Uh we’re out of chips but blueberries instead?” you asked, holding up the package.

“That’s fine,” he said, spinning in his seat. “So...lights?”

“Well Leon is Noel backwards and since it’s six months from Christmas it’s kinda like a mini-Christmas day,” you said.

“Never heard of it.”

“Well most people have never heard of a devil’s trap but that’s a thing that exists too,” you said. He hummed and sipped on his coffee, crossing his legs on his seat. He looked younger like that and you smiled, hoping he was in a good mood this morning. “I only decorated a little bit.”

“So it’s like Christmas? I didn’t get you any presents,” he said.

“We don’t have to do presents. It’s more about, doing things together, making cookies, having a nice dinner together. Maybe take a day off from hunting,” you said. You put your back to him and finished with his pancakes, dropping some fresh blueberries on top for him when you were all done. You hummed and slid the plate in front of him, giving him a fork and knife along with a glass of water.

“I uh, actually wanted to talk to you about hunting. Sam and I saw something online,” he said. You sighed and poured more batter into the pan.

“A new case?” you asked, forcing a smile into your voice.

“This big house in Lawrence. Not obnoxiously big but it’s big, big enough for like eight people I’d say,” he said.

“Is it haunted?” you said, watching the batter bubble and begin cooking.

“It’s for sale. We were thinking of buying it. He was gonna talk to Eileen and I said I’d talk to you about it.”

“About…”

“Buying it,” said Dean. You turned and frowned at him, Dean shoveling his second pancake into his mouth. “What?”

“First off, chew. Second, why would you guys buy a house? You’re not suddenly going to become the Property Brothers are you?”

“No silly. The house would be for us. Obviously we’d ward the shit out of it but yeah, house. What do you think?” 

“Why would we get a house?” you asked. Dean rolled his eyes and you put the rest of the pancakes on a plate, bringing them over and taking a seat beside him. “Like, is there something wrong with the bunker?”

“Nothing wrong with her. But Jack and Cas are up working in heaven and the world’s not so scary...and I did have a house in heaven when I was there.”

“You still haven’t told me about whatever space time continuum crap you broke in order to be back from the dead.”

“Jack just said it was alright so I’m back and considering you weren’t up in Heaven like we all thought you were, we all decided on a do over. I missed you and I liked that house but I want you in that house with me.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying...let’s go live in a house and maybe I hunt every once in a while, maybe I run point for some other hunters, if we decide to go that route. Maybe I do something different for work. But I’m also saying, I like waking up and having pancakes and having random holidays and being happy and I can decide to do what I want, for me. I want a warm happy house with my family. You can decorate it for whatever holidays you want if I can have that.”

“We can have that,” you said quietly. You reached over and he already was meeting you there, hugging you with a happy sigh. “You’re really ready to leave all this behind?”

“We can always come visit this place. But I think our family should grow up the way we didn’t get to. We deserve that at the very least.”

“And you said you didn’t get any presents,” you said, holding him tight.

“I may have known you were planning this,” he teased. “I waited a little longer to share the news than I was hoping to but I figured you wouldn’t mind your Leon day present.”

“No, no I don’t,” you said. He kissed you and grinned before he hopped up. He dug around in the pantry and pulled out a bag of peppermint white chocolate chips. “Well now you’re just bragging.”

“I heard we were making cookies,” he said, dropping them on the counter. “Later though. After my yummy breakfast.”

“After your breakfast,” you said, kissing his cheek. “Love you. Best mini Christmas ever.”

“Love you too sweetheart. This Christmas you’ll have a whole house to decorate. Think you can handle that?”

“Absolutely. As long as I get some help?”

“Yeah I think you can swing that,” he said. He kissed your temple and hummed, throwing an arm over your shoulder. “So where’s my present in all this? I mean, I got a house and like a life changing decision for you and I got pancakes?”

“You fucking love pancakes,” you said.

“Guilty as charged,” he said. 

“I’ll make you them every single day if you want, how’s that sound?”

“Every single day?” he hummed.

“For the next week.” He chuckled and nodded. “Love you.”

“Love you back Dean.”

___________

[ziorite]

crying laughing (mostly just crying) over the long goodbye job rn because what the fuck guys. what the FUCK.

(spoilers for the last episode of leverage season 5)

i still had so much hope for them even after hardison fell and parker got shot. i was crossing my fingers because eliot will be there and they’ll get away because they always get away ?? right ?? but then they make it the van and eliot gets shot. right in the fucking chest.

THE VAN SCENE. I WAS DISTRAUGHT. DISTRAUGHT Y’ALL. AND THEN HARDISON’S LAST WORDS ARE TO WONDER IF ELIOT IS OKAY ??? “HERE I AM”??? WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT. AND THE THREE OF THEM FUCKING DIE HOLDING EACH OTHER’S HANDS WHAT DID THEY DO THAT TO US FOR. (something something parker dying alone when she’s finally learned what it means to have a family something something eliot dies first because to watch the people he’s dedicated his life to protecting die in front of him is to die a second and third time something something)

and then the cherry on top when nate and sophie look back and the three of them are dead and bleeding out and clutching on to each other in death what do they do ??? they don’t even consider giving themselves up they drive that van up the bridge and into the damn river.

nate’s enraged yelling at the agent had me wide eyed with my hand over my mouth. fucking STUNNED yall. nate is really no one’s favorite but my god the fucking pain in his voice. 10/10. BUT THEN of course that’s not all there is to it. the switch from grieving fury to composed nonchalance was both peak comedy and absolute whiplash.

AND HERE’S STERLING !! everyone’s favorite slime ball <3 and ho ho ? he’s mad at nate for killing the rest of the team ?? they grew on him didn’t they— like clumps of adorable mold that just keep coming back <3

and finally. the master plan is revealed. sterling did scare the living shit out of me shooting “hardison” like that but of course nate had a better plan than what they believed. crazy to think that the whole damn emotional rollercoaster was really just set up for the actual break in. (eliot’s exasperated eye roll and fall at nate’s “bang !” was everything.) starring sterling as the trojan horse! an amazing choice all around.

AND !! we have a proposal !! proposals plural actually because no way in fucking hell was that not a confession from eliot. that scene was the height of romance and i will be DAMNED if someone tries to tell me that was just normal best friend shit. OT3 IS REAL !!!

in conclusion: love leverage, they have the amazingest show to ever show and a finale better than any other out there. 200/10 would watch again and i am currently penning a love letter to john rogers and dean devlin.

[ninii-winchester]

Unveiled Sorrows (Part 5)

Pairings : Dean Winchester X Reader, Sam Winchester X Reader (platonic), Dean Winchester x Lisa Braden (mentioned)

Word count: 4.6k

Warnings: heavy angst, spoilers s1-s6, mentions of violence, foul language, brief mentions of pregnancy and childbirth.(no details).

A/n : This series follows canon plot line but some scenes might happen differently or be completely changed. Check the warnings for each part before continuing

A/n: For the purpose of this series, Sam came back with his soul. Gemma and Will Campbell are OCs.

I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION TO COPY MY WORK, TRANSLATE IT OR POST IT TO ANY OTHER PLATFORM. REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED.

Bobby watched Dean drive away. He never imagined he'd do something like that. He turned to see y/n on the ground.

"No...no Sammy. Come back." She dug her fingers into the ground. "Please." She sobbed as she continued digging as if the cage would still be under the ground. She hoped by some miracle it would open up and give her best friend back.

"Y/n let go." Bobby tried prying her hands off the ground. "Let go God dammit your fingers are bleeding." He jerked her body upwards and dragged her off to his truck. He made her sit inside and grabbed her stuff from her car. He got into the driver's seat, and took off. After an hour of driving she calmed down.

"Hey! How come you're walking again? I mean not that it's bad but I'm curious." Y/n asked Bobby.

"I sold my soul to Crowley to find Death. He said he could give me anything so he gave me my legs back too."

"Crowley the demon? Gave you your legs back?"

"Strange world we live in." Bobby shrugged. Y/n give him a look. "What?"

"Are you stupid?"

"Excuse me?"

"You sold your soul to a demon? You're gonna have your ass dragged to hell you know that?"

"He said he's borrowing it."

"Wow Bobby, he said and you believed. Thats a demon. You can't trust demons." Bobby didn't say anything after that. Halfway through the drive Y/n called out Bobby's name. He glanced at her urging her to go on.

"I'm pregnant." She said making Bobby hit the brakes abruptly.

"Come again?"

"I'm pregnant."

"What?" He was shocked to the core at the revelation. She only stared ahead not looking him in the eye. "What the hell were you thinking confronting Lucifer? Are you mad? Did you have no regard for your life or that child's?" Bobby yelled as he started to drive again.

"I'm sorry I just couldn't sit back and watch." She whispered.

"Did you three plan this scheme 'kill Bobby of a heart attack'." He sighed and then he paused. "Who's the father?" He asked.

"Dean." She looked out of the window as the scenery passed.

"Figures. Did you tell him?" She shook her head 'no'. "Will you tell him?"

"Do you really think he wants anything to do with me after the way he left?" She snapped. Bobby stayed silent.

"I'm taking you to a hospital, we need to get you checked." Y/n nodded.

The two of them made their way back home after a long drive and a pit stop at the doctors. She was fine and the baby was healthy too. They gave her some prescription and told her to rest. Bobby had told her she'd be staying with him from now on and he won't take no for an answer. He cared for the three of them like their own. Now with Sam being dead and Dean being God knows where he'd like to keep her here safe. Ever more now that she's pregnant.

"I'm telling you, you should tell Dean. He deserves to know."

"Dean didn't give two shits before walking away from us Bobby, we've known him for years. Do you think he'd care for a bastard child like that?" Y/n retorted.

"Watch your language, young lady. That's my grandchild you're talking about." Bobby scolded her. Ofcourse he thinks of Y/n as the daughter her never had.

"Well news flash Bobby this ain't no love child." Bobby rolled his eyes at her comment.

"I'm sure he'd-"

"You know what actually? I'm sure he would want to know but I don't want to tell him. Walking out was his decision and not telling him about this is my decision." Y/n said walking away.

It had been two months since Sam died and Dean left. Y/n still mourned Sam's death and she missed him dearly. She wondered how he'd react to the news of her being pregnant. She's at five months now. She was in the main room cleaning and refilling her guns. Just because she's not allowed to hunt for the time being doesn't mean she won't be cautious.

She heard a knock on the door and she knew Bobby wasn't supposed to be back until later. She grabbed her gun and stuffed it in the back of her jeans. She grabbed her shotgun and went to the door. When she opened the door, her jaw hit floor. She couldn't believe her eyes. There stood Sam Winchester in the flesh.

"Y/n." He breathed out and she pointed the shot gun at his chest. "It's me, Sam."

"Not you're not. Sam's dead."

"I know I died Y/n but I'm back."

"That's not possible. Who brought you back? Was it Dean?" It pained her to say his name but now's not the time to think about that.

"I don't know what or who brought me back but I'm willing to go to every test." He raised his hands in surrender.

"Alright." And with that she shot him.

"Ow son of a bitch. That hurt Y/n." He complained.

"It was just rock salt, don't be a bitch."

"Jerk." Sam replied and for second her guard dropped. Still pointing the gun at him she grabbed a silver knife from her back pocket and threw it at him. He caught it and sliced his arm, he showed her as the blood trickled down his arm. She then grabbed the holy water and threw it at his face.

"A little warning would've been appreciated." Sam sassed  as he wiped the water from his eyes. "Can I hug you now?"

She kept staring at his face. She grabbed his arm and dragged him to main room and made him stand under the devils trap. Sam looked up and then moved away from the trap. Before either of them could say anything Y/n jumped up and wrapped her arms around him. He hugged her back and he felt something different about Y/n as he hugged her.

"How did this happen, Sammy?" She asked as they pulled away.

"Uh i don't know." He replied looking at her oddly. Y/n was thankful that she was wearing one of Sam's shirts, it was huge on her so her body was completely covered. Not that she had huge bump but still whatever she had, it was covered.

"How long have you been back?"

"Two months?"

"TWO MONTHS? SAM WINCHESTER YOUVE BEEN BACK FOR TWO MONTHS???" She exclaimed loudly. "Where have you been for the past two months?"

"Yeah I've been researching, I needed to know how I came back and uh I went to see Dean." He explained.

"You met Dean? Why's he not here?" She shouldn't care but she did.

"I didn't meet him. I just saw him." Sam replied.

"What do you mean? Why didn't you meet him? Where is he?"

"He is living with Lisa and Ben. He uh... he looked normal, he's living the apple pie life he always wanted and I couldn't go up there and take it all away from him." Sam told her with a sad smile. They both knew Dean would drop anything for his brother.

Y/n knew Lisa, she's met her once when they helped her get her son, Ben, back. Lisa was in Dean's life way before Y/n was. That was his only serious long term relationship she's ever known of. Lisa is a wonderful woman and it made sense why he left Y/n for someone like her.

"Was he...did he seem happy?" She had to ask.

"The happiest I've ever seen him. I didn't have it in me to go ahead and ruin everything. He looked so happy but I knew if I went in there he'd leave all of it to be back in hunting. I couldn't do that to him." Sam told her honestly.

"I agree."

"Where's Bobby?" Sam asked and the man in question entered the house and gasped at the sight in front of him. He grabbed the shot gun by the stairs and aimed at Sam. "Aw dammit not again."

"It's alright Bobby i checked. I did all the tests." Y/n intervened. The older man lowered his gun.

"Tell me something only Sam Winchester would know!" He demanded.

"A month before I fell, you lost your years to a witch in poker and then Dean lost to get your years back which made him old. But then I won back Dean's years and he turned back to normal." Sam narrated.

"What? When did that happen?" Y/n giggled as Bobby pulled Sam in a hug.

"When Bobby came to help us with the witch. You stayed back when we last hit the road." Sam replied.

"Oh I remember that, but you didn't tell me Dean got old." She laughed.

"Dean told me not to." Sam replied.

"Did you tell him?" Bobby asked Y/n and her eyes widened.

"Tell me what?" Sam asked warily.

"Uh look at that would ya? It's time for lunch. Why don't you wash up Bobby I'll set the table. You must be hungry too Sam." She said walking into the kitchen as Bobby went to freshen up. Sam followed her into the kitchen and she brush past him.

"Tell me what Y/n?"

"Would you like a beer, Sammy?" She pulled out a bottle and passed it to him. He banged his hand against the table gaining her attention.

"Tell me what?"

"I'm pregnant. It's Dean's." Y/n said calmly. The beer bottle slipped from his hands onto floor and shattering into a million pieces.

"What?" He asked completely in shock. Y/n pulled her shirt up a bit and it showed her bump. Sam stared at in utter disbelief. "I had no idea you and him? You and Dean you...?" He stuttered.

"It happened one night. It was a mistake." She lied. Ofcourse it wasn't one night and it wasn't a mistake either. But what can she even tell him.

"Does he know? Did you tell him?"

"No." She replied as she continued to set the food on the table.

"Why? Why wouldn't you tell him? he wanted a family for as long as i can remember."

"And he has a family. With Lisa. And Ben. I'm a hunter Sam, he can't have that white picket fence life with me which has with them. Don't you think he should live with the woman he loves and not with some good lay and a bastard child?" She snapped.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to say that word?" Bobby glared at Y/n as he entered the kitchen.

"What? That's your summoning? I say bastard child and you appear out of thin air?" Y/n replied sarcastically.

"You watch how you speak to me." Bobby's glare deepened.

"You can't kick me out. I'm carrying your grandchild." She stuck her tongue out the man she's come to love, as her father, over the years.

"I can when it's born."

"You wouldn't." She rolled her eyes.

"Are you two done? Because i would like to rewind to the part where you called yourself 'some good lay'." Sam sighed.

"What? You want me to say I was bad?" She joked.

"How are you not affected by all this? Stop acting like it doesn't bother you." Sam bellowed. He knew it must've been killing her inside.

"It doesn't bother me Sam."

"You have to tell Dean." He pressed on.

"I will not and if you did, I will shoot you. Not with a shot gun filled with rock salt but I'll put an actual bullet through you. And this is not an empty threat."

"I know things weren't good the last time we were here, he said things, he was stressed -"

"No Sam. It has nothing to do with what happened the last time."

"What is it then?"

"He left." Bobby said. "After you fell, he drove off leaving me and her behind. He didn't look back and we haven't heard from him since." He said solemnly looking at Y/n.

"I won't tell him. I promise." Sam said to y/n and She nodded. Sam felt a pang of guilt hit him. He remembered the talk he had with hin on their drive to Detroit. If only he hadn't made Dean promise to not find Y/n and go back to Lisa, things would've been different. Dean would've been here with his child and Y/n wouldn't have to go through this all alone. If only he had known. But how could've he known.

"Sam? You zoned out.!" Y/n called out.

"Yeah uhm I'm fine just too much to take in." Y/n nodded in agreement and Sam filled the two of them about the past two months. How his grandfather Samuel is also back from the dead. And he's been staying with him distant maternal cousins for the past two months.

Sam introduced Y/n to Samuel and his family. They've been getting along fine and Sam's back to hunting with the Campbells.

Three months later Y/n gave birth to Adeline Mary Winchester. No-one other than Bobby and Sam knew who the was the father of Adeline. Adeline was the cutest baby Sam had ever seen and much to Y/n's dismay, she looked exactly like her father. She had bright green eyes and dirty blonde hair. She had freckles all over her cheeks and nose just like Dean's. She reminded her too much of Dean.

"She looks exactly like Dean, no offence y/n." Sam said as he cradled his niece.

"None taken, Sammy. I know she looks like him." He placed her in her arms gently. "Hi there sweetheart." Y/n cooed at her daughter. "Isn't she adorable?"

"She's lovely." Sam commented. "I wish Dean was here." She wished too.

"But he's not."

"Because he doesn't know." Sam replied.

"I'd like to keep it that way. And we're not having this conversation again."

Y/n missed hunting. She'd been staying put and helping with research at Bobby's but she missed hunting. Neither of the men allowed her to go on hunts even if it was a basic salt and burn. Adeline had turned four months old three days ago. She was currently in Bobby's arms as she slept and Sam's on a hunt with Samuel.

The phone rang and Y/n answered it before it rang too much and woke up Addy.

"It's Gemma." She's one of Sam's distant cousins. Barely eighteen but a good hunter. "Me and Will are on a hunt and seems like we might need backup." Y/n relayed the information to Bobby hoping he'd let her go since there's no one else. The old man rolled his eyes and nodded. Y/n squealed with happiness and kissed his cheek.

"Thank you. Addy darling mommy's gonna be back before you know it." She kissed her daughter's cheek. "Don't bother the old man okay? I love you."

Y/n packed her stuff and drove her car to the town Gemma told her they would be in. It was dark when she left Sioux Falls and she arrived at the town at 4:20am. She met up with Gemma and Will. They decided they'd get those ambush the nest first thing in the morning. The three stayed in a motel room where Gemma took one bed and Y/n slept on the other. William was kind enough to give up on a bed and opt for the pullout couch instead. It had been a while since Y/n had been in a motel room.

It reminded her of Dean, how he would pull her in for a kiss every time Sam went out. Or how he would make her feel good when they shared a room. How he would make sweet passionate love to her and how the two of them created Adeline in a motel room. Then she felt bitter. He didn't make love to her, he had sex with her. If only he loved her like her told her, he would've never hurt her this bad. Or leave her alone by herself.

The morning came earlier than she expected and the three of them drove to the warehouse which was the supposed Vampire nest. There were nine vampires in total. Y/n hadn't felt this thrill in the past few months and she was thriving on it. Pumped up with adrenaline, she went in for the kill and ended up killing five on her own. All her frustration washing away with vampires' blood . Gemma and Will finished off the other four. The two rookies were impressed by her skills. The sun had set when they were with cleaning and disposing off the bodies. The three skipped town as soon as they cleaned up because a few of Gemma and Will's guns were at the motel, out in the open, the cleaning maid saw them and called the police.

They stopped two towns over to grab a few drinks. It was around nine pm. It had been a long time since y/n had alcohol. They went inside the bar and grabbed a table. Gemma and Will ordered beers but Y/n went for whiskey. She downed it one go and asked for another.

"Hey don't look at me like that, it's been a while i hunted or even drank." The two smirked and cheers to her. She decided to give Bobby a call and let him know that she'd be home in a few hours and asked if Addy was doing okay. To which he told that Sam's back and Addy has been with him since. She sighed in relief when she heard that.

"How's Addy?" Gemma asked.

"She's good. Sammy is back and she's with him right now." Y/n smiled thinking about her little girl. Her Dean jr.

The bar door opened and two men walked inside, one of the them was chattering too loudly which made Y/n look up and she wished she hadn't. She saw Dean walking in with a man she didn't recognise. She watched as Dean heard his friend's chatter with a smile on his face. He looked...normal. Just some guy you'd find at a bar on the weekend. He didn't look like Dean Winchester. The one she knew. She hoped he doesn't see her but has luck ever been on her side? He looked at her and their eyes met.

Dean stopped dead in his tracks as soon as his eyes landed on her. His heart felt like it would burst out of his chest. It's almost been an year since he last saw her but the mere sight of her was enough to make him fold. She looked just a beautiful as the day he left her. The day he broke her heart but ripped his own into pieces. She looked like he had gained some weight, but it suited her. And then his gaze dropped to her lips, those same lips that he used to kiss sore, the same lips let out those sinful noises when he made her feel good. Those lips, he'd give anything to feel against his own.

"Dean, are you okay?" Sid asked as he noticed Dean stop.

"Yeah man, I'm good." He said still looking at her. He knows he shouldn't, but he couldn't help himself before he spoke, "i think I saw someone from my high school, let's go say hi." He said walking towards her table.

"Sure." Sid followed behind him.

Y/n's heart rate picked up as he got closer, why is he walking towards us. Is going to act like he knows me? The sheer audacity of this man. Hasn't he broken me enough why..

"Hey.! Gracie Henderson, right?" Dean spoke as he reached their table. Gemma and Will turned to look up at him.

Damn you Dean. Fuck you. He had to strike a nerve there. That was their alias when they had to go undercover as a couple. It was always Y/n and Dean since Sam couldn't like a couple with Y/n. He just had to make everything awkward, so it was always Dean and Y/n. Gracie Henderson and her husband Troy Henderson.

Ofcourse he couldn't miss the chance to hurt me again. Y/n thought to herself.

"Huh?" Y/n feigned ignorance.

"You're Gracie right? We went to high school together." Dean said looking right at her.

"Sorry? I think you have the wrong person." Y/n spoke the alcohol in her system giving her the courage to speak to him. "I never went to high school and its Adeline."

"Alright my bad." Dean said, his friend mumbling a sorry before they went to sit at the table beside theirs. His friend went to order for them and he sat there eavesdropping the conversation happening at the table beside him.

"He definitely knows you. That was one of your aliases." Gemma said as soon as Dean left. Y/n shrugged in response ordering another drink. "Cmon y/n tell us why did you act like you didn't know him?"

"Because he's Dean Winchester." She practically sneered his name. Dean flinched at the way she said name.

"What really ? He's Dean?" Will spoke for the first time in awhile. Y/n nodded.

"Why didn't you tell him to join us?" Gemma asked and Will added a "yeah why not?"

"Are you two dumb? What part of his appearance says he's a hunter? He's not in the business anymore. And the guy that came with him? He screams 9 to 5. So what did you two expect me to invite him to our table and reminisce the time we went to a fucking high school to burn the body of his brother's friend and his friend's bully?" Y/n spoke agitatedly and the two nodded in understanding. She downed her drink.

"I can't believe i came here out for this. You two needed backup for nine vampires? You know Bobby doesn't let me go on hunts. I came out to hunt after almost a year and its some stupid fucking vampires." She sighed dramatically.

Dean perked up when he heard her say she hadn't hunted in almost an year. Is she out of the business too? What does she mean Bobby doesn't let her hunt.

"You haven't hunted in almost a year and still you took down five vampires on your own." Will sat there in total awe. "You're my new role model."

Sid had already came back but Dean's attention was still on y/n. He smiled when he heard she took down five vampires on her own, that's my girl. He thought to himself.

"You two kiddos did good too. I'm sorry I snapped, I'm a bit stressed." Y/n said.

"It's alright." Gemma smiled.

"I'll head out." Y/n said grabbing her jacket and threw a few bills to for her bills.

"You're driving back to Sioux Falls?" Will asked and she nodded. "Aren't you drunk?"

"I've only had three drinks."

"Yeah of whiskey." Gemma added.

"Trust me kiddo. It takes a lot more than that to get me drunk." She replied and Dean noticed a lingering sadness in her voice.

The love of his life has been through hell and back and she's still kicking it. He wishes he could just grab her and disappear from the surface of the earth. To keep her from harms way and keep her protected from all the sadness and hurt. He wish he could love her the way she deserves to be loved. He watched as she left the bar before yelling a "get home safe kiddos."

The first thing y/n did as she reached home was to see Adeline. It was around five in the morning when she reached home. She saw Sam in the kitchen eating cereal and looking at his computer while he held Adeline on his lap.

"Good morning." She said as she entered the kitchen.

"Look Addy, mommy's back." Sam said holding her up. The baby giggled as she saw her mother approaching her.

"There's my baby." She picked up Adeline in her arms. "Did you miss mommy?" She asked in baby voice and the little girl flailed her arms, excitedly tapping her mother's cheeks.

"How was your 'first' hunt?" Sam joked earning an eye roll.

"It was good, vamps nest." She said sitting beside him, pulling her hair away from Adeline who was gripping it too tightly.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked noticing the stress lines on his best friend's face.

"I'm fine, why'd you ask?"

"You have that look on your face." Sam replied gesturing to her face.

"What look?"

"That look when something is bothering you but you're too prideful to say."

"I don't have such look on my face." Y/n said bouncing Addy on her lap.

"Y/n." Sam stared at her. He knows it's only a matter of seconds before she's spilling the truth.

"I met Dean okay? No big deal." She sighed.

"What? You met Dean? How?" Y/n filled in him with everything that happened after the hunt.

"He looked like a common man, it was weird seeing him. And the audacity to walk up to me and say hi? He was lucky he was with someone or I would've bashed his face in the table." Y/n growled her hold tightening on Adeline.

"Maybe he missed you and he thought after seeing you again he could talk to you." Sam said hoping he could get her hate him a little less.

"Well he thought wrong." She said angrily making her way out of the kitchen.

"Do you want me to watch Addy while you rest?" Sam called out from behind her.

"I am very much capable of taking care of my daughter on my own." She snapped, she didn't mean she didn't need Sam's help, she always appreciated his existence. But at the moment her words had a different meaning. She wanted Sam to know that just because she met Dean doesn't mean she will let him be in Adeline's life.

Sam sighed as he watched her walk away. He most definitely understood the meaning behind her words. Y/n went to her room and laid Adeline on the bed. She kneeled beside the bed and looked at her daughter. Adeline wiggled amd giggled staring at her mother. Y/n couldn't help but let a few tears run down her cheek. She never wanted this to be her daughter's life, she didn't need her innocent baby to grow up around monsters, without her father being there to protect her.

"How I wish I could hate your father, Addy. I resent him for what he did to us but I still love him. How could I not when he has given me you." She whispered, her daughter stared up the her with her bright green eyes that reminded her so much of her lost love. She placed soft kisses on her chubby cheeks before putting her in her crib. Y/n sighed as she got into bed. Little did she know this was the last time she had a good night's sleep in a long time.

Tags:

@spnfamily-j2 @queensilber @deangirl96 @galway-girlatwork @hobby27

[t0ast-ghost]

Hmmm mmmmmm I have so many boys thoughts and since I’m not sleeping tonight I guess I’ll write them down:

(Spoilers for the Boys season 4. Don’t cry over spoiled milk show! Go watch it for yourself)

- Truthfully I didn’t like Hughie in the second episode they just made him (super forcefully) bring up his mom. I did really like all his other bits though especially the stuff we’re getting into with a-train (really hope they actually go through with giving him plot, since he’s supposed to be the main character and all that or whatever)

- every time a character got close to another I legitimately asked if they were gonna kiss

- butcher is my wet cat sad puppy murdering babygirl, he’s slaying this season by actually communicating and I hope it stays that way

- This is the second time I’ve seen Jeffrey Dean Morgan play a horrible person willing to weaponize children for their cause… and he’s good at playing that part (I feel they gave his character a lot of what Butcher was in the comics)

- I really do like what they’re doing with A-Train

- I really do hate what they’re doing with Annie and Firecracker, I get they have to have personal conflict but this feels shallow and although it’s believable that this grudge would last I think there should have been more thought put into the stakes of their relationship (Curry and Moriaty’s acting was so good for the bit where Firecracker threatens her but the stakes are so low and the hatred in the writing doesn’t feel built up enough for her to have that big of a reaction to the threat)

- Going back to Hughie and his mom, I think Quaid’s acting for the bits with his mom were phenomenal, I could relate to his frustration and his sadness was palpable. I think a lot of their moments didn’t feel great and I couldn’t put my finger on it but the conversation about how her depression lead to her leaving felt like the truth finally came out and now it’s hopefully going to feel a bit more like things are moving forward for them

- I’m a little surprised they actually had a character like splinter. Simply because he felt straight out of the comics, and I know how much they’ve veered away from the comics. I really liked the scene where Butcher got to take out a bunch of them simply cause he got to be good ‘ol Billy Butcher

- Homelander has me on a roller coaster because I was going to write a post while watching about how they write him really well in a mindfuck kind of way because you slowly start realizing you’re relating to his character and you can understand his actions, and right before I wrote that post he told the deep to suck off a train and I stopped dead in my tracks. I was legitimately scared in that moment because that also felt like something out of the comics but the difference is that the tv show wouldn’t or at least didn’t go through with it

- Homelander this season is even more brilliantly acted, and seeing him with Sage is a new interesting experience. I was trying to figure out Sage’s motivations and I thought I knew but really I didn’t know because I was trying to say she was fighting for a cause. That is wrong. She is constantly manipulating the people around her but it is solely to benefit herself and her happiness. Yes, she helps Homelander and is honest with him because that is the best way to keep herself happy and alive. She’s smart enough to know that manipulating him or trying to agree with everything he says will be a dead end. She’s still trying to please him and is ultimately playing by his rules but she’s the smartest player because she knows being inauthentic will only end up losing you power, and if you’re on the end of two hot glowing red orbs anyway, why not at least have an actual say

- The gore is going well so far. I’ve appreciated it. Especially the beetlejuice-esque scene where Kimiko has her face torn off and you only see the back of her head and the reactions

- Ryan has so many good scenes. His scenes with Homelander are punctuated by quiet, you can hear every thought screaming through, but what would saying any of it actually accomplish? His scenes with Butcher are so heartfelt, I’m glad they’re finally able to talk. But Ryan still dealing with his grief and guilt is heartbreaking. And on top of that him thinking that the closest person to his mom seemingly hates him and would never want him adds so much to the emotional confusion that he’s experiencing. He obviously needs to leave Homelander, but he still doesn’t want to leave his dad which makes sense because this is currently the only source of love he has from anyone and it was promised unconditionally (even though it is very conditional)

- Frechie’s gotta tell that guy that he killed his family but I was really glad they gave him a boyfriend. I forgot that him and Kimiko weren’t a thing so I got really excited that Frenchie was getting to be awesome and polyamorous. I am glad that Kimiko has asserted that they are friends tho

- I am so intrigued by the brain worm

Thoughts upon second rewatch:

- Opening could’ve been bloodier or more horrific. They toned it down :( but the flesh and blood melting off that guys face was pretty good. And the Todd scene is pretty horrific.

- The way Ryan and Homelander speak in unison about people being ants is so telling, and makes sense with the later context of Homelander wanting Ryan to be an exact replica of himself

- The way that Ryan in this season is so focussed on fear, because he is scared but the people around him won’t admit to that, so when Butcher finally communicates with him and tells him that he’s most afraid of dying without making amends I think that finally gains Ryan’s trust back

- They really are changing Butcher’s character, he’s not just ‘do thing to get thing and it’s justified by the end result’ he’s finally thinking about the people around him and considering them even if the results aren’t fast. He doesn’t give the info to Vick, he doesn’t drug Ryan, and he’s really trying to help even if he is still being a shit about it

- The talk between Vick and Homelander in the opening is sooooo good cause of HL’s little voice crack, he’s losing it

- KIMIKO PAINTS HER NAILS!!! they’re blue :)

- I feel like Hughie’s hatred towards Vicky is forced upon him. Like I guess he hates that she lied to him (but if he thought about it he’d realize that it’s reasonable for her to want to hide her powers especially since she’s been shamed about them for most of her life) and I get they have very different views with her under vought’s thumb and all. But since they’re recruiting A-Train I’m wondering if there’ll ever be a bit of a redemption for her cause I feel like wanting supes to be allowed to live like normal people is not a bad thing, it’s just that she’s working with people who view supes as superior

- “He killed that poor cunt in broad daylight, and they fucking cheered.” Alongside Homelanders “I save people, they cheer. I fucking kill people, they cheer.” is like, they both understand this fact. Homelander will get what he wants no matter what and Billy wants to take him down a notch. Same as always and yet so many changes.

- I missed that the acid that Hughie threw on Vick was Frenchie’s creation the first time around. Also missed Hughie’s failed pep talk, I love that loser. I didn’t miss that no one else is able to understand Kimiko, which sucks

- I want Karl Urban and Simon Pegg to be in the same room again but that’s just my star trek fan talking

- Is that the first time Hughie and Butcher properly hug in the series?

- There’s a weird obsession with phones this season. Especially with hanging up on people. Also an obsession with “no/yes, sirs” which I think is them upping the show of power dynamics

- I thought that octopus sounded familiar. It’s Tilda Fucking Swinton.

- “He always knew he was destined for greatness, because he came from greatness.” Good job guys. I see your little joke

- I did not notice that all the guys setting up Firecracker’s stage were splinter who is played by Rob Benedict (Chuck in Supernatural)

- One of the background noises at the Truthcon mentions an “Alex Jones look alike contest”

- When Ryan throws Koi against the wall in other shows that would be his turning point. The point in which there’s no going back for him. So I’m really glad that it’s just the point in which he needs to talk to someone, that it really does upset him. Unfortunately he goes from one horribly emotionally repressed man to a slightly less emotionally repressed man who is dying

- I hope whoever that person that Kimiko knows turns into a new found family member

- M. M slowly realizing why Butcher was such a bitch to everyone on the team. And it’s because no one listens. Ever. Unless you’re actively threatening them in one way or another

- I don’t know what that bloody metal rod in Sage’s room means even after a rewatch. So I guess I’ll find out.

- Closing thoughts; bring in more A-Train and Hughie moments (also get people to call him Reggie so I don’t have to write A-Train every time)

Hughie has weed in his desk

If y’all wanna talk about this with me (especially after reading all that) feel free to do so

Uhhh more thoughts here

[loveinterestcastiel]

why the fuck do people keep working themselves into a veritable frenzy over jensen saying that when dean lost cas QUOTE “one of his closest- the closest people” to him he also lost a brother in arms? what part of that is a problem? what do y’all people think brothers in arms means?? quickly now. because it’s not actual Brothers babe achilles and patroclus are THE historical brothers arms and what are they? fucking gay. cas’s confession is a “testament” because it is his self-journey’s [resolved] highest TRUTH “a long time coming” and it doesn’t need to be resolved further because it’s not a problem!! cas is complete and evolved as a character for speaking his truth. dean already “processed and accepted” it while his ass was sat on that concrete floor letting sam think he was dead for hours!! none of this means it will not be ADDRESSED in future canon. in fact he said WHEN they reunite it will be “understood” for the not subtext but “CLEAR TEXT” that it is. he literally said that “when you find your people” that’s all that matters, and that means not only is cas dean’s person, the reverse is true too. they “found each other.” that’s understood. that’s the text. this is a GOOD ANSWER that leaves room for future plotlines and the evolution of their relationship without delving into spoiler territory. i get that jensen measures his words very carefully and that makes people nervous but there is zero malicious dismissal of the romantic nature of 15x18 or homophobic attitude towards the destiel relationship here at all. he literally said “it was beautiful and it was heartfelt and it was true and it was raw and it was real.”

like for fucks sake people. i’m sorry to have to be so harsh. i don’t normally get worked up about fandom illiteracy but what he said is being so wildly misinterpreted right now across all platforms that it makes me feel crazy. i welcome discussion in fact i like that we don’t have to have the same opinion all the time but this is too much

[musclesandhammering]

Spn Opinions That’ll Have Me Burned at the Stake Pt. 2: Electric Boogaloo

I’m back and bitchier than ever. For reference, here’s part 1.

• Season 5 wasn’t that great.

• D*stiel isn’t real, it’s a sucky ship, and that confession scene was just the writers pandering to the rabid deancas fans cause they knew they were the only ones still watching the show lol. And they left it ambiguous enough that they could still say it was meant platonically if they needed to.

• I hate how they watered down both angels and demons post-season 5ish.

• I liked Ruby 1.0 better than Ruby 2.0.

• I hate Honey!Cas. They just did that cause they didn’t know where to take his story from there, needed him out of the way, and thought it would be funny. It was insulting.

• Jack should’ve been played by an actual child so everyone’s abuse of him would resonate with the audience for what it was (casual fans are brain dead and need to be spoon fed).

• Victor Henrikson deserved more time on the show.

• I said it in the last post, but Alex is way more interesting than Claire and should’ve been given the lead role in the wayward sisters storyline instead.

• Dean is canonically straight and for Christ sake if you guys wanted bi rep, there’s about a thousand other characters that are strongly coded or implied to be bisexual (including Sam!) but y’all didn’t focus on them because it wasn’t actually about representation, it was about making it more plausible for your dumb fetishised gay ship to actually happen (spoiler: it didn’t).

• Season 3 and Season 6 were some of the best ones, you guys just don’t have any taste.

• Claire is not Castiel’s daughter and saying she is erases Jimmy and insults her, and even Cas himself acknowledged that on the show.

• Castiel is canonically NOT gay and Misha constantly saying he is is annoying and airheaded. He’s been attracted to women IN THE SHOW and he’s not even really male, so calling him a Gay Man is reductive and just plain wrong. Also, it’s veeery sus that- given how bi/pan folks are even more underrepresented than gay people- that one of the rare times where the bi/pan label actually fits a character BETTER in CANON……. the allies and monosexuals adamantly reject it. Hm.

• “Curing” vampires or werewolves or demons shouldn’t have been a thing.

• The Winchesters cause most of the bad shit that happens and then they just force supernatural beings to fix it for them- tell me again how they’re Super Special Heroes.

• It shouldn’t be possible to make angels human by removing their grace, because (unlike demons, werewolves, etc) they were never human to start with. If you drained me of all my blood, I wouldn’t magically transform into another species, I’d fucking die.

• Making Billie go crazy was dumb.

• Rowena was one of the most interesting and charismatic characters on the whole show- they just didn’t know what to do with her character.

• The archangels, Lilith, and Azazel should’ve been the biggest threats on the show. No other knights of hell, no god and his sister, no Cain, nothing like that. Having every villain just get progressively more overpowered made the show unbelievable and repetitive and annoying.

• The kernel sanders king of hell guy was hot.

• Dean is misogynistic as HELL, homophobic, likes racist porn, is a narcissist, pervs on teen girls, & thinks all non-human people should be exterminated… and that is all CANON.

• Most of John Winchester’s abuse is fanon.

• Fans portraying Cas as a smol bby who colours in colouring books and has a bee plushie is so fucking annoying.

• Instead of having so many gigantic cosmic storylines with god and his sister and alternate dimensions and even the angel and demon tablets, they should’ve just scrapped those and made the stein family and the bmol and the alpha vampire storylines way bigger than they were. Less cosmic stuff, more earth-based stuff.

• They ruined Lucifer’s character post-season 5. Before that, he was more sympathetic and reasonable than Michael. After, he was a spoiled child hurting people for fun.

• Everything from season 7 on is garbage. All of it. There’s bits of goodness here and there but overall seasons 7-15 are trash.

• How the fuck are there actual people who are deangirls and hate Sam?? The space where your brain should be is empty, I swear to god.

• If there was gonna be any lgbt rep in the Wayward Sisters group, it should’ve been Jody and Donna instead of Claire and Kaia. Those two were boring as hell and had zero chemistry or build-up, but Jody/Donna had plenty of chemistry and was very believable.

• Meg has the best and most realistic redemption arc of anyone on the show.

• Chuck was not likeable or charismatic enough to carry off as big of a villain arc as they gave him. Also that whole thing was stupid and WAY too Out There.

• All the angels should’ve been aroace. All the demons should’ve been pan.

• I stanned Cole so hard up until he changed his mind about hating Dean. That was disappointing.

• Sam went through the same shitty childhood Dean did (plus Bonus Abuse on top of it) and he didn’t turn out Like That.

• I cannot think of a single person that was asking for a spin-off about the Winchester family, like that has to be the most boring thing.

[rabbitholeee]

*SPOILERS FOR SUPERNATURAL SEASON 5*

WHAT THE FUCK?? jo and ellen are dead??? i actually can't. the way dean kissed jo on the forehead while closing his eyes tight, like he couldn't bear losing her, AND THEN ACTUALLY KISSED HER???

i'm ill. i can't do this. sobbing rn.

[mackeydoodledoo]

Chapter 1: A Good Impression

Pairing: Lamina x (Fem!Mentor)Reader

Summary: Besides Sejanus, you had a heart among the 24 students to act as mentors. People made fun of you for getting paired with the girl who never stopped crying. But, you were going to do whatever it took to get her home.

Warnings: TBOSAS Spoilers, Injuries, Social Anxiety, Swearing

Key: Italics = Thoughts, +*+ = Time Skip

Theme: Softcore - The Neighborhood

A/n: Welcome to my first Lamina x Reader series! Idk how long I'm going to make this series :)

Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7

-------------------------------------------------

"Seven. Boy, Vipsania Sickle. Girl. Y/n Y/l/n," Dean Highbottom reads off the list

You look up to your female tribute... She huffs her shoulder upward. She was crying... You heard a few snickers. You really wanted to punch them in the face. But your heart was broken when you watched her cry.

"Looks like Y/n got the crybaby," Arachne snickers to you

You dead stare at her: she had always made remarks towards you but then look back up at the screen, catching one last glimpse of your tribute before it switches to the next district.

After the assigning ceremony, you find a spot outside of the area to just have time to think.

How am I going to make her a victor?...

"Looks like Y/n is having second thoughts about being assigned the crybaby of the tributes," Arachne says, coming up to you

"Lamina is not a crybaby," You say, looking up at her

You too never got along. But, since the both of you were in the same class, you were forced to tolerate her.

"Then, what is she to you? Don't tell me you are actually growing fond of your tribute now," She continues to belittle you

"Me? Fond of her? Please..." You say, "Unlike you, I have a heart. I'm going to make my tribute the best one out of all of you."

"I'd like to see you try, Y/l/n," Arachne stares you down

+*+

Both you and Coriolanus Snow waited at the train station. You look up at him: white rose in his hand and an anxious look on his face.

"With the stunt your tribute pulled at her reaping, she's already captured the capital's eyes," You tell him

"I just don't know how to get her to trust me," He says

Before you could offer some kind of advice that most likely wouldn't help his case in the slightest, traincars came to a hazardous stop. Both you and Snow make yourselves presentable.

As the peacekeepers forcefully grab the tributes out of the cars, both you and Snow look for your respective tributes.

Going off from your photographic memory: Lamina donned shoulder length red hair being tied back with a hair bandana.

Suddenly you see a girl with a matching description pass you by.

"L-Lamina," You anxiously call out to her

The girl stops and turns to you. Putting on your best smile, you reach into your pocket and present a small gift box.

"I-I know everything must be very frightening for you. But, i just wanted to Welcome you to the capitol," You try to keep a smile on

Despite you probably already fucked up your self-introduction.

But, Lamina doesn't answer. She doesn't even meet your gaze.

"I-uhhh," You begin to scramble your sentences, figuring out how to make her talk, "Made this myself."

You frantically tug at the ribbon, and open the lid.

"I... I never made anything of the sort in my life and. And. And-" You attempt to find the right words to even just speak

You gently take her hand, placing the shitty-made gift into her hand. She turns away from you, still not meeting your gaze.

Both you and Snow wistfully hop into the car just before any peacekeeper noticed two Academy students were in it.

An awkward silence sits upon the 24 tributes, you and Snow.

"What's the matter Capitol?" The boy from 11: Reaper asks, "You're in the wrong car."

"We should just kill them," The girl from 4: Coral suggests

Your eyes widen as the boy who was hovering around Lamina comes walking up to you. He presses his arm along your collar bones, pinning you to the back of the wall.

"Treech don't... She's my mentor," Lamina speaks for the first time

Treech's arm eases away from your collar bone. You are really going to have an interesting time...

"I reckon anything happen to them, something would happen to our loved ones back home," Lucy Gray states

"Then how come none of our mentors showed up?" Coral asks, "Why do you and the little crybaby get special treatment?"

"Because they don't know how to make a good first impression," You immediately answer, cocking a half smile, "That and... Most of them don't... Care like we do."

You werent actually sure if Snow cared about Lucy Gray. But, you knew you cared. Unlike your capitol classmates, except Sejanus, you never grew fond of the games... Having to be a mentor to a tribute who could die...

That's the real kicker to the gut.

Your eyes drift to Lamina. A slight smile appears on her face before she looks down at the floor.

The car came to an abrupt stop. You hear the sounds of the backup noise on a vehicle. All of you begin to waver from the car tilting. All of you begin to fall out of the truck, entering an exhibit.

As you begin to become aware of your surroundings, you recognize the place...

The Capitol zoo.... The hell?

A lot of the citizens on the other sidenof the cage began to murmur. You look over to see Snow absolutely terrified out of his mind.

I'll show him how it's done...

You stand onto your feet and strife towards the camera.

"Ahhh, Y/n Y/l/n," Lucky Flickerman makes his way toward you, "Now tell me, Was it required for you two to be in here with the other tributes?"

"Not exactly. For starters, they didn's tell us not to. Second, Snow and I wanted to leave a good first impression on our tributes," You say, "Let me introduce you all.. To my girl, Lamina."

You outstretched your hand and turn to look at her. She nervously stands to her feet. You walk over to her and gently grab her hand.

"I got you," You whisper, reassuring her

She nods as her hand closes around yours and follows close behind you. For once, she finally gazes up and sees the camera in her face.

"Tell us Lamina, what finally got you to stop crying once you got here?" Lucky asks

She let's go of your hand and reaches into her pocket and shows the half-assed gift you made.

"My mentor made it for me," She looks at you, "Didn't know someone like her could be talented."

"Is that so?" Lucky looks at you

"Like I said, I wanted to leave a good first impression," You smile

You conclude your small interview with Lucky and watch him walk over to Snow. You sigh in relief as you falter in the slightest.

"Do you have any food?" She asks, hiding into your chest

You reach into your skirt pockets and pull out some cookies.

"This is all I have for now," You say

As you place it into her hands, you felt an arm curl under yours and begin to pull you away.

"W-wait hold on!" You tell the peacekeeper

"Please...." Lamina sighs into your arm

She looks up at you, "Handful of us haven't eaten since our reaping..."

"I'll do what I can," You answer

Lamina let's go of your arm as she watches you get dragged out of the cage.

+*+

"Sejanus, got a second?" You ask him

He gets up from the table and you pull him aside.

"I need you to do me a favor," You say

"Yeah, of course," He says

You and Sejanus were close, not as close as he is with Corio. But, since the both of you share the dislike of the hunger games, was how you two grew close. You pull out a few sandwiches and other snacks.

"I need you to bring these to Lamina," You say

"Why don't you?" He asks

"I have a different idea," You say, "But this should tide her over for now."

He nods as he places them in his backpack.

"Done," He says

"You're the best," You smile, patting him on the shoulder

You hastily walk into the kitchen.

"Y/n honey?" Your mother looks up from her work, "Shouldn't you be at lunch right now?"

Your family were cooks for the academy. Not the most glamorous job in the capitol since the dark days, but it got your family around since. Your family taught you, so the academy allowed you to enter the kitchen at anytime you want.

"Kindof, but I want to cook a meal for my tribute," You say, "Enough to last her until the games."

"I know the perfect meal," Your mother goes into the recipie archive

+*+

You take a step back from your creation. Your mom giving you a congratulatory pat on the back.

"I'll wrap it up for you," Your mom tells you

"Thanks mom," You say, continuing to gaze at your masterpiece

+*+

"Psst, Lamina," You quietly call her

The redhead sits up and rubs her eyes. But seemed to fully awaken once she realized it was you.

"Y/n," Lamina sighs, slightly smiling, "Wait how did you get in here?"

"Perks of having a decent amount of money to keep us on our feet," You say, "But enough of that, I brought you something."

You place your backpack down and carefully take out a wrapped meal.

"Y/n," She sighs

Before you even handed her your personal cooked meal, you noticed in her eyes of how shaken up she was.

"Hey, what happened?" You asked

"The girl from 10... She killed her mentor, in which the peacekeepers shot her..." She explains

"Holy shit...." You mutter

You saw that she could smell the food. As you hand it to her, she nearly tears right into the wrapping.

"It's enough to last you until the games," You say

*Lamina's POV* The smell of the food overwhelmed you. You look up at her, waiting for her. But, she nods. You immediately indulge yourself into the meal.

"Oh my- how did you?-"

"Perks of having cooks for parents," Y/n says, "They teach you everything you need to know about cooking."

"Ahh, that must really be nice," You say, "Back home my parents really just taught me how to chop wood for our essential use while they were working at our log factories."

"Do you... Have siblings back home?" She asks

"Got a younger brother," You answer, "But, he's a mere baby. He won't remember me when I die."

"Hey," She coos, reaching out for your hand, "Don't say that. He deserves to have an older sister to look up to."

"I can't guarantee that I'm going to win," You look down at your joined hands

"I'm going to get you home," She says, "I have to go but... Eat up."

She gives your hand a gentle, but firm squeeze as she stands. She takes one last look at you before she makes her leave.

*Y/n's POV* You honestly didn't really want to leave her. You would stay at her side all night if you could. But, you didn't want to upset your family as to why you hadn't returned home.

+*+

You walk into class the next morning...

"You and Snow made quite the impression on the viewers yesterday Y/l/n," Dean Highbottom says

"I only wanted to leave a good impression on my tribute," You say

"I wouldn't recommend getting too close," He suggests

"Trust me Dean, I won't," You say, taking a seat at your usual spot in the class

"I find that hard to believe," He says, "I'm very fond of you, because of your hard work Y/l/n. I only wish you the best."

Though you only try your best to be in the good graces of people. Though that often makes you a pushover to a lot of the capitol students who want to make it to the top. It was like you unintentionally try, and somehow you do the best.

+*+

A peacekeeper shackles Lamina's wrists to the table.

"You all have thirty minutes to discuss strategy for the interviews," Highbottom announces, "You may begin."

You sit down, Lamina doesn't look at you.

"Frankly it's so unnecessary to be shackling all of you like this," You say, "How are you holding up?"

Her lip begins to quiver...

Oh boy...

Immediately she brings her hands up to her face and begin to silently cry to herself.

"Hey," You coo to her

You gently grasp her shackled hands, and slowly bring them down onto the table.

"Lamina, look at me," You calmly tell her

*Lamina's POV* Trying to pull yourself together, and slowly raise your head to look at Y/n. Suddenly, you felt no fear... You no longer felt like crying. You nearly twitch back when you saw Y/n's hand being to rise towards your cheek.

"Sorry," She says, nearly drawing her hand back

However, still feeling calm in her presence, you allow her to gently wipe your face from any tears.

*Y/n's POV* "These interviews are important for you all," You begin to explain, "This will help you get donations from sponsors for the games. However, it'll help me too so that I can send you items that you may need while you're in the arena..."

Lamina begins to cry again...

"Hey hey shhhhh," You calm her, "Do you remember what you told me last night?"

She nods.

"We need to get people to empathize with you, make them feel like they can relate to you," You suggest

"You want them to pity me?" She asks, "Hell no..."

"Lamina," You sigh, clasping your hands over hers, "I don't care about winning for me. I care about winning for you. Winning for you would mean that you'd survive in that arena and you'd get to go home."

"I still don't want them to pity me," Lamina sighs

"Not pity, empathize with you," You say, "Make them feel like they are able to connect with you."

Your fingers brush against her cheek, brushing hair away from her head.

"I'll... I'll try," Lamina says

"Atta girl," You smile

"Time's up," Highbottom says

The peacekeepers begin to forcefully take the tributes back.

"H-hey! Easy with her!" You try to tell the peacekeepers handling her

You were about to reach up to them to escort her back yourself. However, Highbottom grabs your arm and shakes his head.

+*+

You decided to pay Lamina another visit.

"Hey Lamina," You whisper

She turns over; her face lighting up.

"How are you holding up?" You ask, "Those peacekeepers earlier were really man-handling you guys... I was about to sock one in the jaw and escort you back myself..."

"You're too kind," She smiles

"I only want to leave you with a good impression of me," You sigh

"You've already done that," She confesses

"Really? Since when?" You ask

"Since the day you were at the train station," She says

"Now you're too kind," You chuckle, "You know... Even though they taught us to think lowly of the districts, and that you all were monsters. But, getting to know you... It taught me that the capitol was wrong... You.. Proved them wrong."

Lamina doesn't answer you. It caused you to look at her, worrying that you said something wrong.

"I-uhh," You immediately bolt to your feet, "I have to go but- but I'll see you tomorrow for the tour of the arena."

You reluctantly turn your back to her and begin making your way to the entrance, where your mother awaited for your return.

+*+

You meet with Lamina for the tour of the arena. Lamina clung to your arm. From the corner of your eye, a peacekeeper was about to pull Lamina away from you.

"It's fine," You tell them, not allowing them to touch her

Enjoy the Show

Lamina jumps at the saying once the both of you pass the turnstile gate.

"Hey, camera on Coral," Festus Creed gets the camera crew to focus on her

You roll your eyes.

Try-hard...

The lights illuminate the concrete arena. To think people would actually sit in the arena and watch children murder each other was an outrageous concept to you.

"Mentors and Tributes, you have one hour to walk around the Arena and devise a strategy," An announcement echoes

Chapter 2

[lavenderdreams205]

spn thoughts as requested

tw & spoiler warning

they should have kept the grungy filter and aesthetics from the early seasons

bring back the southern / midwest gothic vibes

dean would've listened to and loved 90's & 2000s grunge - I know that the whole "there's no good music past '79" is a key part of his personality but pre series/early seasons dean is soo nirvana / Weezer / smashing pumpkins coded

there is too much flannel in the later seasons - I miss the carhartt and leather jackets so bad

BRING BACK DEANS JEWELRY

there's so much about cas that we don't know. there's all the episodes where he just isn't there and they never tell the viewers what he's doing or where he went

on the same note, cas's personality isn't nearly as flushed out as sam's or dean's are. who is his favorite musician? what's his favorite place to travel to? why does he like the pimpmobile so much? does he actually like the trench coat or does he wear it just because it's there?

so many people characterize cas as a little guy, and while he is cute, it's important to remember that he's also an incredibly powerful eldritch horror who leads angelic armies and brands Michaels vessel just because

dean is bisexual and in love with cas - I won't take the time to list all of the reasons here, but you can definitely find those reasons somewhere

i would've loved for them to use the handprint as a physical manifestation of their bond instead of having it be just a scar that fades with time

i'm actually really ok with the way cas dies, I think it makes sense for his character and provides closure (for him, at least, not for dean)

the parallels of cas and dean meeting in a barn and then dean dying in a barn

cassie is deans first love, cas is his last

the imagery of the empty as cas's wings in 15x18

why do the subtitles spell cas as cass, its awful

there's a few lines in the early seasons that seemingly reference dean getting roofied / sa'd and are subsequently played for laughs, Jensen Ackles confirmed that dean would've done underage sw when John didn't leave them with enough money. I believe that this trauma is a major reason that dean never accepted his sexuality

the way deans alcoholism is overlooked and joked about is actually insane

having dean be completely ok after 15x18 is also insane, especially after the widower arc where the show specifically shows it's viewers how deeply dean grieves cas when he dies

deans death is literally so stupid. I get that the show is trying to make a really meta point about the characters not having plot armor anymore because chuck is gone, but dean deserved to find peace. if the events of the show had never happened and pre series dean had never gotten pre series Sam back into hunting it would've ended the exact same way - dean dead on a hunt and Sam dying from old age

dean spends as much time on earth as he did in hell, and while he would never be the same, I like to believe that if he had been allowed by the narrative to live longer he would've gotten back a little of the twinkle in his eyes that he had before hell

in 15x20 Bobby says that cas helped rebuild heaven but if he was there he would've gone to see dean. additionally, there's no way cas should have been able to escape the empty. this is such a glaringly obvious plot hole and it drives me nuts

I would've liked to see cas's wings in the show - not just the shadow of them

the only time I tolerate serious discussion of wincest is in the context of ethel cain

i am a Sam disliker - while he does have many positive qualities, I have a really hard time getting past him not looking for dean when he was in purgatory and him joking about deans alcoholism and other traumas

i like Sam the best when he's with Eileen, I think they're adorable together and I'm mad they killed her off

I am a chronic jack defender, that boy has done nothing wrong

it would be interesting to explore cas and jacks relationships with their respective genders

there's no way being forced to murder the dean clones didn't affect cas, we only saw him kill the last one but the first few he had to kill had to have been devastating

i'm really disappointed by 14x13 Lebanon, we get the scene with John and Sam but I would argue that dean has significantly more reasons to be upset with John and it's unfortunate that the episode just glossed over this - I believe a screaming match between the two would have cleared the air a bit and been at the very least cathartic for dean

i'm fairly sure that it's canonical that John sent dean away on his 17th birthday to kill lesbian ghosts. my personal hc is that John suspected that dean was bi and sent him to teach him a lesson

i saw a post on here comparing hunting culture to biker and cowboy culture and viewing those things through a queer lens and I thought it was fascinating - there's so much spn could've done if it cared about the show more than money and losing viewers

every time cas and dean beat the shit out of each other, it serves as further proof of their relationship rather than discrediting their relationship - ie demon dean and cas fighting in the library is used to parallel Cain and Collette. it could even be assumed that their love is stronger because Cain killed Collette but dean left cas alive

The purgatory love triangle was so silly

once dean worked through all of his trauma and toxic masculinity he would've been a swiftie

all of the main characters have old / vintage cars but in like season 13/14 dean sam and cas just collectively own and use this really ugly silver truck from the 2010s. its such a small detail but it absolutely ruins my viewing experience every time I see it

dean is actually really smart but most of the fandom overlooks it because Sam is characterized as the smart one. if you know anything about cars you know it takes an insane amount of brains to build a car from scratch (he did this with baby multiple times throughout the show) also he just makes an emf meter using basically nothing. if dean had been given the same opportunities he gave Sam, he would've been an engineer or something

i will always be a John hater, if this man has 0 haters, I am dead

[softedwin]

if spn, but especially destiel (and/or cas and/or dean) ever meant anything to you, please for the love of god go watch dead boy detectives. it is everything that spn never gave us and so much more and so much better and so much gayer

(spoiler: they actually go to hell to save the gay repressed twink and he gets to confess his love to his best mate!!)

[farenmaddox]

SPN wild theory time

I will just go ahead and start with my thesis statement: I don't think that Jack killed Mary.

With that out of the way, let's get into my warnings for this post: 1. There will be spoilers for Seasons 11-15 of Supernatural 2. I wasn't in this fandom 5-6 years ago when these episodes were coming out; maybe you guys already talked this all out and your entire response is going to be "we already went through this, dude." 3. This post is actually like 3-4 posts in a trenchcoat. I may have gone slightly overboard.

All that said, buckle up, here we go.

Chuck's "omniscience" is questionable. He has been surprised by Dean's decision-making and been upset about it, and has admitted that Castiel is someone whose actions often contradict Chuck's narrative. So, by his own admission, he doesn't/can't know everything.

However, he always thinks ahead and always has multiple ideas on how to solve a situation, and he always has a contingency plan.

First, let's look at how he handled the Amara situation. I would characterize Chuck's behavior in Season 11 as writing a self-insert fic. Chuck is a writer, after all. He knew that Dean taking the Mark of Cain would either lead to Dean's destruction or to Amara being released, so he would have been ready for Amara to appear well before she actually did. But it's only in episode 11x20 that he chooses to do anything about it, ostensibly because Metatron talks him into it. We already see signs that he's kind of "done" with the prime world and the Winchesters here, but then Metratron convinces him to give it another go, and that's when it becomes self-insert fic.

He displays the ability to absorb Amara into himself in episode 15x17, so I think this was always the contingency plan if all else failed. But he wanted to be in the story. He wanted to be on the team and be a hero, so he joins up to do the big assault on Amara plan that is carried out in 11x22. I truly do not think he foresaw that Amara would win that fight. And with how badly wounded he is, the contingency plan is no longer viable. So he has to go with the Dean-as-a-bomb plan. He was already thinking about letting it all go to shit, so this is fine. But then Dean wants to save the day with his faith in familial love, which Chuck definitely didn't see coming. I think Chuck lets it happen despite the fact that he doesn't actually give two shits about Amara just because Dean is his favorite and has managed to surprise him so maybe the world should go on a little longer.

All of this is just establishing a baseline of Chuck-ness. Now we're going to talk about Jack.

See, I don't think Chuck ever planned on Jack actually being carried to term and surviving. The wild card, as always, is Cas. Who, when he had a chance to kill a nephilim (a thing he has done before! a thing he has assisted in doing in the past! it's a sure bet for Chuck!)...doesn't do that. But that's okay (Chuck thinks)! The Winchesters will probably kill the kid! And if they don't, and Lucifer wins, then Chuck can swoop in and be like "my beautiful son and my beautiful grandson, oh my me, this is delightful, we should be a family" and then kill them both.

Dean hating Jack was absolutely Chuck's first choice of potential plots for how to take care of the Jack problem when it turns out that there is going to be a Jack. He likes that story. It surely fills him with glee that Sam doesn't hate Jack and Dean does. But then... fuck, it's Castiel, again! Chuck had no involvement in Cas being resurrected, for once. No way to predict that one. And Cas being back means that Dean doesn't hate Jack and isn't going to kill him, especially since Jack helps them get Mary back, which sucks for Chuck, who is now very committed to this storyline of Dean killing Jack. Don't forget, Chuck can kill Jack whenever he wants. But he wants Dean to do it. He's bored and done with Dean and is ready for Dean to be dead.

So, how do we get Dean to kill Jack? Well, obviously Cas's death doesn't goad him to do it because the fucker just can't stay dead, so it has to be Sam or Mary. And it can't be Sam, because Sam has to watch Dean kill Jack and himself. That's the story. So it has to be Mary, right?

Chuck just has to wait for the right moment.

Jack has a strong sense of fear about hurting people by the time of Mary's death. 13x06 and 14x16 are some critical episodes where we see how he feels and reacts to hurting innocent people. And he seems to have pretty good control over his powers as well. He had just recently had a conversation with Donatello (in 14x15) about how easy it is to continue doing the right thing without a soul. His decision to kill Felix the snake was very much on purpose and very controlled, and honestly can everyone shut up about the snake. Jack fucking loved that snake. It was sick and nobody else knew how to help Felix either. He euthanized a sick pet.

So it is hard to believe that Jack just randomly lost control of his powers and killed someone whom he had no reason to kill. That's not really consistent with Jack's behavior. Even when he's in a complete rage in 14x20 after what Sam and Dean did to him, he doesn't kill them. At his most angry and while experiencing a huge surge in power, he somehow doesn't kill Sam and Dean. But we're expected to believe that in 14x17, he just "accidentally" flies off the handle and kills Mary.

The thing that is genuinely so crucial is that we do not see Mary's death in 14x17. It does not happen on screen. Deaths in this show always happen on screen, and it's not on screen. All we see is her face near Jack's, and the next episode all we see is the blast site. I think that the reason we don't get to see it is because it didn't actually happen the way we're told it did.

The fact that Mary can't be resurrected? That's weird, and new. That literally never happens. Everyone can be resurrected. People who were turned into paste by archangels can be resurrected. People who have been cremated can be resurrected. But Mary can't be? That's got Chuck's smell all over it.

Jack thinks he killed Mary, but he fucking didn't. Chuck did it. Chuck smote the shit out of that woman and Jack doesn't have any other explanation for what happened. I don't even think he is actually hallucinating Lucifer. Soulless guy who "doesn't feel guilt" and doesn't want Lucifer in his subconscious but somehow can't get rid of him? It's Chuck. It's Chuck dressed up as Lucifer to keep Jack on the edge and convince him it was his fault so he can lead everybody to the grand finale.

And then stupid Dean ruins the story and doesn't kill Jack. Which Chuck should have seen coming, because this is what happened with Amara! But he didn't, because sometimes Chuck actually doesn't know things! It's okay though (Chuck thinks), because Chuck always has a contingency plan. He has always been able to kill Jack whenever he wanted, and if Dean's not going to do it, Chuck might as well. So he does.

I'm telling you. Chuck killed Mary. Jack didn't do it.

[tidbit-fanfic]

A/N: Finally finished this based off of a dream I had once upon a time. As always I do not own any named characters in this, except for the “reader”. Set in season 11, although Reader and Dean’s relationship has been well established before that. 

TW: no HEA, cannon level violence, swearing/language, kinda OOC!Dean, unhealthy coping mechanisms, implied smut (not explicit), blood (mentioned), spoilers for season 11, one use of y/n

I met the Winchesters after my college roommate passed away under unnatural circumstances. To make a long story short, a demon had decided that a college campus was the best place to set up shop, and nearly half of my dorm was harmed in the process. I did my best to help, despite having very little knowledge of such creatures, but I was willing to help. From that point on, I became a powerful ally to the brothers, and a formidable foe to the supernatural.

After Bobby’s death I stepped up full-time, becoming their go-to researcher for anything they were facing. Life was going fine, helping with research the best I could, working in the background against the Leviathan. 

Time blurred together, from helping the boys with the trials,fighting Metatron alongside Castiel, and along the way, something bloomed in between me and the eldest Winchester. What started as friendly teasing and taunting, morphed into actual flirting and soon enough, physical touch was involved. We were great, always backing the other when needed, even when the Mark of Cain became a third wheel in our relationship. Throughout it all, I stood beside him, forever and always. 

I waited for the boys at the hospital, standing on the steps as they helped Jenna out of the Impala. After helping them get her into a wheelchair, I checked them over, finding that there was no visible damage done to the brothers; the sheriff, however, was holding onto her side, her shirt covered in fresh blood. She tensed upon seeing me, her free hand inching toward her gun. I held my hands up in a defensive manner, intending to show no harm.“Normally, I’m the one grabbing the gun when approached.”

“Show us your neck.”

I furrow my brows, looking from her to the boys. Dean nods, and I reach down, pulling the collar of the turtle neck down. “Satisfied? Or do I need to conjure up a hickey or two?”

  Jenna relaxed, trying to look past me into the hospital. Dean grabbed my arm, dragging me just out of earshot of the other two. “I thought I told you not to worry about it.”

“Right, right, because that’s what you would do.”

“No, it’s just,” he ran his hand through his hair, huffing out air. “You know how I feel about you searching for trouble.” 

I snorted. “Honey, you’re all the trouble I need. But, I get it. My big, scary boyfriend is worried about me. Even though he knows how I can handle myself perfectly fine.” 

Dean opened his mouth, just as Sam interrupted. “What’s the state of the hospital? Where is everyone?”

“Dead. No pulse whatsoever.” Sam’s eyes took on a saddened glaze. I cocked my head towards the door, searching for an exit from the conversation. “Let’s get Sheriff Callie fixed-up then, shall we?”

All of us cautiously made our way into the hospital, wary of the chance of a rabid attacking at any point. The halls seemed way too quiet, the sounds of our beating hearts the only noise our ears intercepted. When we reached the exam room, Sam dismissed himself, searching for antibiotics for Jenna. Meanwhile, I stood to the side as Dean stitched the sheriff’s wound closed, watching the meticulous way he tended to her. Dean finished with his work, helping her down from the table, turning to me after. I crossed my arms, watching as he unrolled his sleeves. I looked to the sheriff, nodding to the room behind me. “There’s a comfortable chair in there, you should probably take a little break.”

“I’m fine.”

“You lost a lot of blood, I’m guessing?” I raised a brow as she looked away. “There’s some juice in the mini fridge and a couple granola bars in the lower drawer. Eat up, we don't need you passing out on us.”

She sighed, following my instructions and shuffled into the office. I shut the door behind her, regaining my composure before turning back to Dean. He busied himself with cleaning the area, avoiding eye contact with me.

“Are we going to talk about it?”

“About what?”

“You know what.” I huffed, hoisting myself up onto the table next to him. “About you running away, and then suddenly there’s a code red in the area you distinctly were in? Oh, and how about the fact that you told your brother to take care of me? The girl you are in a relationship with?”

“Are we going to address you going against my specific orders to stay put?”

“God damnit, I was worried about you! You went to get yourself killed and didn’t even think to tell me goodbye in person!” I slammed my hand down onto the table, leaning into his face. “I swear sometimes I don’t recognize you anymore. Mark or not.”

He glared at me, irritated with the invasion of his personal space. “Maybe that’s because I’m not who I was.”

“Yeah, go figure.”

“No, you don’t get it. The Mark—”

“Fuck the Mark. You’re Dean Winchester. The Dean Winchester. Even Hell trembles in the mention of your name. A stupid ass curse is the last thing I would expect to break you down.”

His jaw ticks as he looks to the ceiling, probably sending off a prayer to Cas for some sort of strength, to deal with me. “I am not the person I was before.”

“No, you're not. And you know what? That’s fine. We’ve been through worse than a fucking personality change. Shit, I ran from a demon you with a goddamn hammer in your hand. I’m sure if that didn’t turn me off from you, then nothing can.” I pushed the bag to the side, sliding over so I was in front of him. I reached my hand out, cupping his face as I looked deep into those emerald green eyes. “I’m in this till the end, you hear me? Forever and always.”

“Forever and always.” He sighs, pushing his face into my palm, before pulling me into an embrace. I wrap my arms around him, breathing in the scent that is so distinctly Dean, when Sam enters with a man holding a child. I pull away, eying the new editions to the room. 

“Sorry for interrupting, but we have company. I found them hiding from one of the infected.” Sam rushes out, nodding to the father. 

Jenna opens the door, joining us again, looking much better with the nutrients in her system. A look of recognition crossing her features. “Mike? Where’s…”

“She’s gone.” The father, Mike, looked down to the child, an expression of grief taking over his features. I slide off the table, pushing Dean back, crossing to him. The sheriff joins us, murmuring her condolences to Mike, who rocks his baby slightly. I step back, allowing the friends space as I check in with the brothers. Sam nods towards the father, the black veins creeping from the man's neck. Dean clears his throat, returning our attention. “We need to kill him.” 

“No, we don’t.” Sam states, exasperated with his blood.

“What are our other options then, because I don’t see many.” 

“There has to be some other way,” I reason, “he has a newborn, we shouldn’t even consider that.”

Sam backs me. “That’s true. This infection seems to have a time frame, the rabid in the hall, just died after some time. Maybe we have to wait it out.”

“Wait it out so he can attack us like the rest of us? No Sam, I can't let that happen.” 

I turn back to our company, not wanting to continue with this argument.  

Noticing the child fussing, I walk over, directly to the father. “May I?”

He nods, handing me the baby and I look down at her, cooing and rocking her in an attempt to calm her. Mike watches closely, ensuring his child's safety, and an ache rises in my chest at the action. Sam joins us, ignoring the child held in my arms. “We have a plan.”

“You have a plan, my plan was to kill him.”

“Dean.” I shoot him a glare, reminding him he is in the presence of the very person he wants to kill. He throws his hands up as Mike chimes in. 

“No, he’s right, it’s only a matter of time before I attack you all. I’ll leave, distance myself from you and wait out the time period.”

“What? No. What is she going to do without you, her father?” I hold her tighter to my chest, the ache returning. 

“Jenna? Will you take care of her for me? I’ll go wait out the infection and…” He rubs the baby's head, turning to the sheriff. Jenna nods, and holds her arms out for the child. I transfer the child to her arms, going to tuck myself into Dean’s side, his arm looping around my waist. 

“What’s the plan?”

We were stopped at a gas station, Dean calling Sam while Jenna took Amara in to change her. I sat in the backseat, the door open as Dean stood nearby, Sam on speaker. “Everything is going fine here. Really.” 

“Are you sure, because we can come back in a heartbeat.”

“No, you guys make sure Jenna and the baby make it to her grandmother’s, don’t worry about me, I can handle myself.” 

Dean hands me the phone as he heads inside, leaving me with Sam. “You’re one hundred percent sure that you don’t need us?’

A sigh echoes from the other end. “Honestly, no. I caught it, the infection.”

“Sam.” My throat swells. “We’re coming back, right after—”

“No! Just, don’t tell Dean.”

“Fine. I’m not going to lie to him though. And Sam?”

“Yeah?”

“You better use that big brain of yours to find a cure, I’m not looking forward to Dean trying to sell his soul again.”

“Promise me you’ll stop him from doing anything stupid. No matter the outcome.” 

“You know I can’t promise that.”

“Promise.”

I sigh, closing my eyes as the worry begins to creep in. “I promise.”

“Good. Now get Jenna to her grandmother’s, and I’ll see you both later.”

“Right. Bye Sammy.” 

He hangs up just as Dean returns, leaning against Baby. “Did he say anything to you?” 

I shook my head, picking at my nails. “Nothing he didn’t tell you.”

He scrubs his hand in his hair, looking up to the sky. “I hate leaving him behind in a hotspot.”

“I know you do, but this was his idea, he wouldn’t have said anything if he wasn’t confident in his abilities.” 

“You’re right, but I still can’t not worry about him.”

I stood up in front of him, tucking my hands into the pockets of his jacket. “I didn’t want to leave him either, but we have to respect his decisions. Right?”

He lets out a sigh, his hands slipping into the back pockets of my jeans as our foreheads meet. “You’re right. I still hate it though.”

“That’s fair. For now, we need to get those two to somewhere safe, then we can speed back to him, okay?”

He lets out a sound of affirmation before pulling away from me, just as Jenna returns. We all climb back into Baby, heading off to the safe house. 

“Do you think they’ll be fine?” 

Dean’s eyes flicker over to me, returning to the road before answering. “I think so. Might be hard to explain a few years down the road, but that’s not our problem.” 

I nod, watching the fields pass the window as we make out way back to the hospital. Suddenly, Dean’s cell rings, flashing Jenna’s name across the caller ID. He answers it as usual, muttering some responses before whipping the Impala around. “Change of plans sweetheart, we’ve got some other things to attend to.”

We get out at Jenna’s grandmother’s, meeting her at the end of the driveway. “I’m sorry for calling, it’s just, this is crazy. Also, I apologize ahead of time, my grandmother’s a big religious person.”

We enter the house, coming face first with the king of hell dressed as a priest. “Crowley?”

“Hello dears. About time you joined us.”

“So what the hell is happening here, Father?”

“Well, the same thing you were called for apparently, I have some connections, so when an exorcism is called in, I get called in.” Crowley shrugs, as if this isn’t the biggest news.

“Still doesn’t explain why you’re here.”

“I was called in about some sort of demon possession. But, whatever thing is in there, it isn’t mine…it’s darker, more powerful.”

“What do you think it is?”

“If I knew, I would have told you wouldn’t I?” He scoffs, watching as I turn back to the house, going to approach it, before a scream rips through the air. I whip my head to the two of them, eyes widening before we all rush inside, guns drawn. 

Inside, we find the grandmother lying in a pool of her own blood, Jenna nowhere to be found. I shoot a glare at Crowley, who stands to the side, thoroughly unimpressed. The two go upstairs,checking the rest of the house while leaving me with the corpse. “Sorry grandma, but we have to figure this out.”

I check the first floor, finding a sheet, which I lay over her body, out of pure respect. A smash sounds from the second floor, and soon enough Dean comes rushing down the stairs. “They're gone.” 

A few weeks later, I stand at the end of a table, looking in disbelief at the brothers. “Cas is Lucifer, Sam died again, but not really, so you overdosed in hopes of saving him?” 

Sam flinches, avoiding looking at me, while Dean shrugs. “I did what I needed to.”

“By killing yourself?! What if it didn’t work?! What if you actually died? Did you forget you have a vengeful reaper dying to sink her teeth into you?!” 

Dean shrugs, continuing to sip at his beer. 

“And he shrugs. What the fuck has gotten into you? Ever since the church case you've been acting like a total ass.”

Sam looks at his brother, then to me, before excusing himself from the room. I sit in the spot he left, directly across from Dean. “What’s wrong? You’ve been distant since this whole Amara thing began. Is it something with her? Cas?”

He scoffs, peeling at the label on the bottle in front of him, avoiding eye contact. I grab the bottle, reaching for his hand. He pulls it away, glaring at me. “Maybe it’s you.”

“I’m sorry?”

“Maybe it’s you. Maybe you're the issue.”

“Me? How the hell am I the issue? I haven't seen you since dropping off Amara and Jenna. You’re acting like a total ass to me, and yet I’m the problem?”

He stands up, his palms pressing flat to the table, turning to leave for his room.

“Fine, how do I fix this?”

“You don’t.”

“Huh?”

“You don’t fix it.”

“Whatever it is we can fix—”

“We cannot fix anything. There’s nothing to fix between us, not anymore.” He pushes off the table, running a hand through his hair.

My voice begins to tremble, a lump forming in my throat. “What? What do you mean there’s nothing? We’re—”

“There is no we anymore!” He whirls around towards me, a look of pure annoyance painted over his features.

“I’m sorry, but it sounds like you’re trying to break up with me? Which can’t be true.” I stand up, the chair screeching against the floor in my urgency. “Unless it is.”

“It is.”

“No, it’s not.”

“I kissed her. And I liked it. She’s been on my mind anytime I’m with you. Shit, I had to force Sam to promise he wouldn’t tell you. But us? This is done.”

“Wait, who are we talking about? There’s another girl?!” I shouted, tears forming in my eyes.

“Amara.”

“The baby?! The fucking one-month old?! You’re leaving me for her?!”

“Yes!”

“This is why you've been distant. God I’m so stupid. Forever and always my ass.” I wrap my arms around myself. “You know what, fuck this.”

Dean stood there, his back turned to me. I reached up, snapping the chain that once laid delicately around my neck. The silver pendant dangled gently from the ruined piece. I threw it on the table. “Fuck you. And fuck your girl toy. Don’t you dare come asking for my forgiveness when she destroys everything you love. If you are even capable of that.” 

I pivoted, heading to my room, locking the door behind me, not bothering to glance at him again. I rip the photos of us off the wall, tossing them in the trash bin. I hesitate with the first one, the one Sam took of us leaning into one another, passed out in the front seat of Baby. The day we first said the words. A single tear landed on it as I pulled my lighter out of my pocket, lighting the corner on fire before dropping it into the bin with the rest.

I hauled my bag over my shoulder, walking into the garage where my 1977 Chevy Camaro sat, unused since I began running with the brothers. Specifically since Dean. I threw my bag in the backseat, starting the engine and leaving behind what once was my home. Where my heart could no longer stay.  

Sam’s call lit up the darkened hotel room for the fifth time tonight. Not to mention Cas’s numerous calls and voicemails sitting in the inbox waiting to be opened. Yet not a single one from him. I turned my phone over, standing on shaky legs as I made my way to the en suite. I flicked on the fluorescent light, coming face to face with a ghastly image. My eyes were rimmed in red, the deep purple bags making the red so much brighter. Tear stains lined my cheeks, my hair thrown up in a knot, curled in on itself in a mirror image of my stomach. And the irises that one shone bright with life, were fogged over, dull. Dean’s ring sat on the ledge of the sink, mocking me. The ring he gave me that first hunt they went on without me. The promise echoing in my ears. 

“Wear this. It’s my guarantee to return to you, always.”

“For forever.”

“For forever and always.” His lips brushed my forehead, settling the ring on my forefinger, it wouldn't fit on the rest. “Forever and always, princess.”

He returned from that hunt with a nasty cut on his cheek, and a funny limp in his right leg, but he returned. And he always did from that point on, forever. 

“Fuck forever and always.”

I wake up with hair in my mouth, a raging headache thriving between my ears. I groan, moving to sit up, but held back by a heavily muscled arm around my waist. I look over my shoulder, coming face to face with a dark haired man. His deep breaths indicate he’s still sleeping, and the sticky feeling between my thighs reveals exactly what happened after the alcohol hit my system. My phone buzzes on the nightstand beside me, an unknown number calling me. I pick it up, grumbling choice words as I answer.“Who the hell is this?”

“Hello darling. Didya have a nice night?”

“Crowley,” I throw the stranger’s arm off me, getting out of bed and search for my clothes. “to what do I owe the honor?”

“Your man and his sibling have called me in, we have a lead on how to get rid of Amara.” 

“No.”

“I know you and him had a fallout, darling, we can’t do this on our own. So I suggest you get your freshly screwed buttocks to the bunker, asap.” The dead tone rang through my ear, and then through the air as my phone crashed into the wall. I yanked on my converse, mumbling towards my companion. 

“Goddamn Winchesters and their goddamn saving the earth. Look, I have to leave, just return the key to the desk when you leave, and thanks for last night…” I shrugged on my jacket, grabbing my keys and reaching for the door knob. The mystery man goes to speak, having been woken up by our conversation, but I ignore him, closing the door behind me. 

Crowley meets me the second I pull up to the building, a knowing smile displayed on his face. “So, where’s the lucky man now?”

I flip him off, walking inside. I’m greeted by Sam pulling me into a hug, a muddled kiss place in my hair. He pulled away, checking me for any signs of distress. “Are you okay?” 

I nod, glancing around the room, finding Cas, well, Lucifer, Rowena, an individual I didn’t recognize, plus Metatron. I scan the room, looking for the person I least want to see. The door opened behind me, and in walks Dean Winchester, looking like hell warmed over. My breath caught and I swayed into Sam, going lightheaded. He wrapped his arm around me protectively as Dean approached us. “Y/n. Look I’m—”

“Don’t.” Sam growls towards his brother. “They’re here to help us, not for an apology from you.”

“I’m just trying—”

“No, Dean. You don’t get to try anything. They will decide when you get to talk to them. Got it?” 

The unknown individual cleared his throat, directing our attention to the plan. I felt Dean’s eyes burning into my side, and then they snapped to Sam, when the announcement of who Mark would go to. I turned to look up at him, fear clinging to my ribs.“Sam? You can’t.”

“We didn’t talk about this. You can’t, it’s mine to bear.”

“I didn’t tell you because I knew you would freak out like this.”

I grabbed Sam’s bicep, dragging his attention to me. “Do you know what you are agreeing to?” 

He nods, dragging me closer to him. “I have to do it, you know I do.”

I let him go, looking at Dean, our eyes locking. I can see the pain he’s trying to hide, the anger, the worry, all for his brother. I return my gaze to the big man, resisting the urge to comfort him. “Well then, let’s get this show on the road, shall we.” 

The door opens, a beaten woman dragging herself in. Her dark eyes flicker around the room, landing on me, front and center. My breath catches in my throat, her beauty striking me. I swallow visibly, my eyes dragging down her body, before returning to hers. She straightens up, a smirk crossing her face. “Who are you?”

“I’m, I’m no one important.” 

Lucifer impales her from behind, as Chuck steps around me, looking down at his sister. They exchange words, before Amara stands up, throwing the rest of us every which way. My head slams against concrete, the world dissolving behind my eyelids. 

When my eyelids flutter open, I’m in a smokey void, with only Amara in front of me. I step forward, reaching for my knife hidden away in my jacket, only to find it missing. She lets out a laugh. “So you were the one who once owned the heart of my Winchester?”

“Your Winchester?” I let out a laugh. 

She tilts her head, smiling at me. “Right, you both are dating, aren’t you? I might just have to steal him from you. Oh wait, I already have.” She leans in closer, running her nose up my neck, stopping when her breath tickles my ear. “Or I could make you watch as I bind our souls together for eternity. What was the phrase you used? Forever and always.”

“You—”

“Careful what you say to me. I could end your life with the snap of my fingers.” Her smile drops, her hand wrapping around my neck. I grit my teeth together, hissing out my next words. “Do it then, you bitch.”

My body gets thrown backwards, hitting an invisible wall. She tsks at me, her face holding no emotion. “No, no. I’d rather keep you alive. Force you to watch Dean leave you over and over again until the universe ends. Keep you in a little glass cage, as a pet.” 

“You’re sick.” Amara throws her head back, letting out a laugh. 

“Perhaps I am, but are you much better?” 

I glare at her, silently cussing out Chuck for letting this happen. She takes my head into her hands, her eyes locked on my lips. “Nothing? I thought so.” She twists my head violently to the side, and the void disappears. 

My eyes snap open, lungs panting for air as green floods my vision. I sit up, pushing Dean back from me, as Cas stands up. Sam is crouching next to Chuck, helping him sit up, his complexion pale. Cas speaks up, his monotonous voice returned. “You were out for a while. I couldn’t find your soul.”

“Thank you Cas. It’s great to have you back.”

Dean opens his mouth, going to say something when Rowena bursts through the doors.

“You all need to come see this. We have a wee bit of a problem.”

A month had passed since then, and I was thrown into saving the world yet again. Collecting souls to build a spirit bomb, Dean gave up on attempting to talk to me, his brother my guard dog. Saying goodbye to the only man I’ve loved, just for him to remain alive, returning with his mother. Saving Sam from the crazy Brits, and so much more. I moved back into the bunker, much to Mary’s insistence: “The boys need you, as much as they don’t want to admit it.” 

I hid in my room, only coming out for the necessities, to share research I found, basically avoiding Dean. Unfortunately, he eventually caught up during one of my necessity runs. I felt confined as he barred my escape route. 

“We need to talk.”

“We are, aren't we?” I shook his hand off my arm, eyes darting to the exit he left unguarded. 

“No, we aren’t, and it’s killing me.” 

I snorted, “Well, apparently I’m the problem, so distancing myself seems to be the only way to remedy that.”

Dean flinched back, tucking his hands into his pocket as he looked to the floor. “About that, I—”

“No.”

“No?” “No, you don't get to apologize. I’m done Dean. Something in me shattered that day, the day I realized I’m not what you wanted. That I was just convenient for you. And now that there's not another woman pining after you, you want me back. It doesn’t work like that. My answer is no, you do not get a second chance, divine interference or not.” I turned on my heel, rushing back to my room, leaving him

standing there with tears in his eyes matching mine. But, if there's one thing I know about Dean Winchester, it’s that he’ll get over it. 

[starplusfourletters]

I read vision of the future (hand of thrawn book 2 aka Who Scams the Scammers)

(spoilers) and once again it turned into a liveblog, apologies

Hold up are we doing Warrior Cats? Is this Warrior Cats Planet??

What base is “arm around your waist to serve as a psychic translator conduit”

Omigod I WISH my Warrior Cat name were “Jaded of Mara”

Everything I know about Soontir Fel I learned from x wing but I would not have guessed his primary motivation to be "dirt"

@ luke and mara: the girls are talkingggggg

North Barris Spaceport has me twitching

Ghent not remembering who the president is and just assuming it’s probably Leia. I mean fair

What base is "holding hands to brace yourselves over a swarm of flesh eating insects"

So we’re finally asking why Mara ISN’T actually dark side and the answer is… shrug emoji?

Man Zahn really is stuck on “character bonding hike” as a device huh. But consider I eat that shit up

Oh No Lando is racist

LMAO at “so oblivious you need a child pterodactyl to tell you to just kiss already” to “besides I don’t want my life to be like spiderman three I hated that movie” to “kissing with dubious consent” ALL ON THE SAME PAGE like Zahn finally realized he really needed to get this show on the road

LMAO at Ghent getting a free pass from Pellaeon to hack the empire. Like you’re just going to get the thing you need and not steal all of our military and political secrets right? Riiiight? Even more LMAO at the fact that that would probably not even occur to Ghent

When everyone assumes they're the protagonist so finding this one macguffin is their job personally. Like guys I like the energy but maybe we've got enough different plans to do the same thing (the exception, hilariously, being Luke) (and Oh No it turns out Luke is the one to find the macguffin because You Have to Follow Your Heart and Let the MacGuffin Come to You. I eat that shit up also)

Mara’s just... So great.

Not to make everything about my blorbo but absolutely to make everything about my blorbo I do wonder to what extent Ahsoka’s characterization post-Rebels doesn’t click for me is because a lot of the more obvious directions for Oldsoka overlap with Mara, and the powers that be didn’t want to reinvent the Mara Jade wheel. Not to say they have similar characterization – Mara has terminal sam coded dean girl syndrome – but idk, in dynamic range maybe? Calling out bullshit, weaponizing her own abrasiveness, covering insecurity with humor, being Kind of a Lot with a side of trust issues at any given moment – there are modes Mara and Youngsoka share that didn’t pass to Oldsoka apparently. Idk possibly all this is just me wanting them to TALK

Establishing that you can do evil things for selfless reasons without necessarily being in any danger of falling to the dark side is... Philosophically interesting

We interrupt this tale of political espionage to bring you Jedi Relationship Counseling (spoiler alert: communication is key)

"That part of her life [Mara’s time with Palpatine] had died unmourned" I mean mourned a little bit. Mourned for at least a book and a half

I've been willing to suspend my disbelief on everything in this book until "both Luke and Mara forget that ysalamiri exist"

I will never not be a sucker for The Movements and Transferred Ownership of Emotionally Significant Weapons

Oh No thrawn made a second foundation

The Aing-Tii seem OP but whatever

Oh No the second foundation forgot to close the garage doors

(Re: The Jade’s Fire) I know Mara’s having a Moment, and I promise I’m taking it seriously, but when the warrior cat asked “What is it you want, Mara Jade” my WHOLE BRAIN responded with "I want Hermione Granger! And a rocket ship!"

Moranda has real Kevin from home alone energy and I'm living for it

Is it bad that I’m actually kinda happy the Imperials’ Bothawui shield plan worked? Like, they had a really interesting plan and I’m happy for them. They earned it

WAIT IS MORANDA DEAD FR?

What base is “full mind meld while you’re fighting for your lives”

Who would win: ~1.5 Jedi, 2 sentinel droids droidekas, or Artoo with a sauntering gun

If I had a nickel for every time this duology explicitly established Jedi can’t go completely without oxygen, even when in a trance, I’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot but which makes me feel like the Ahsoka show had a weirdly specific axe to grind with the source material

Luke’s proposal to Mara is Just. The. Funniest. Thing. That’s some Anakin-level cringe and the prequels aren’t even out yet. He truly is his father’s son.

I mean POV there’s this guy and for a couple years you want to kill him, and then you realize that’s more of a You Problem, so then you’re friendquaitances for a decade mostly because you don’t approve of the shit he’s getting into, and then you have one (1) honest conversation and get caught in a death trap and he’s like “so I think the next step for us is marriage”

LEIAAAAAA! Full Jedi Knight Leia is both terrifying and hot. I would run.

“So it is treason” – Some random guy

Lando needs to be on the New Republic payroll simply for being willing to speak to any of the other characters and also he needs a raise. This poor guy getting called on to command the entire New Republic fleet mid-battle and he’s like “I’ve been a civilian for 15 years and also I knew you would pull some horse piss like this steve”

Mara Jade, Imperial protege. Skills include: Identifying load-bearing walls. (Now all I want is Property Brothers: Sith Edition)

Mara please. Luke please. These absolute idiots. This is some pear scene shit. I hope nothing bad happens to them ever

The whole back half of this book has been an emotional rollercoaster for me specifically because I wanted Flim to be Thrawn FR soooooo baddddd. And now I’m sad. His name literally means scam don’t do this to me Zahn

I’ve been amused by all the Star Wars universe idioms but I gotta take a moment to specifically showcase “burned your sky-arches.” Karrde is a delight to have in class

Having an independent intelligence agency that’s supposed to work for both the New Republic and the Empire seems absolutely unhinged but go off I guess

When the New Republic and Empire sign peace accords and Luke can’t even be bothered to show up

Mara is great and her arc is fuckin hilarious to me. The narrative has identified her as The Damaged One and I’m like???? She came to terms with her troubled past, drew her own boundaries regarding the Dark Side, recognized that there are people who care about her instead of pre-emptively pushing them away, and resolved to form deeper emotional connections. Smash cut to ROTS Anakin whose physical and psychic damage has literally turned his brain into oatmeal

Again I know this was before the prequels Mad points for explicitly saying Mara needed to form attachments to become a Jedi. Zahn being pretty gangsta there

OH NO THEMB

[winchesterfanatic1967]

The L Word

Pairings: Dean x Reader

Word Count: 1,273 

Warnings- Season 5 spoilers

You awoke with a deep gasp, your heart pounding and eyes wide. Sitting up and looking around the room you realize that you’re ok. Sam was asleep on the motel bed next to you, while Dean slept peacefully beside you. His chest rose and fell steadily, and you were more than grateful that you didn’t wake either of the boys up. 

This hunt had been particularly difficult, and you knew the boys were exhausted and they needed their sleep. You were also exhausted, but the nightmares that usually occurred stopped you from being able to sleep. 

The truth is, you were defeated. You and the Winchester brothers were working non stop and it was beginning to be one hunt after the other without a break and casualty after casualty with more lives lost than saved. It was kind of Sam’s fault that the world was coming to an end, but he received so much backlash from everyone you figured he’s been punished enough. 

You couldn’t help but sigh softly and buried your face into your hands, then running your fingers through your scalp in frustration. Tears pricked at your eyes and you tried desperately to hold them back. All you wanted to do was sleep and get some well needed rest. 

“Y/n? S’matter?” 

You looked to your right to see Dean looking at you with squinty and sleepy eyes. Guilt coursed through you. “M’sorry De. Go back to sleep I’m alright.”

“What happened? Another nightmare?”

You look at him confused but he knew you better than you knew yourself. “We share a bed at every motel we stay in, and when we aren’t staying in a motel we’re living in the car. If you think I don’t know you by now or picked up on the fact that you’re not alright, you’re crazy.”

You quietly sigh, and look to your arms that were holding onto your legs. “You’re right. M’not alright. I haven’t been for some time.”

“I know.” He says teasingly with a smile playing onto his lips and yours did the same. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,-” You shook your head. “But..I really should.”

“I know I’m not the best person to talk to or get advice from. Hell, I bottle everything up and explode when I can’t take it anymore, but take it from me. Talking about your issues is way better than letting your mental health go down the drain…”

“I just…I feel like a failure. We’ve lost so many people in the last few years and with everything going on with the apocalypse… I feel like were losing more casualites than actually saving lives..”

The way he was looking at you was making your heart melt. His complete attention was on you, no distractions and every word you spoke you felt more and more comfortable expressing your feelings to him. You should’ve talked to him more, but you were stubborn just like him. 

The truth is, your heart belonged to Dean and it always will. You’ve had your fair share of hookups with him and you knew that’s all you would ever get. Let’s face it, hunters don’t get a happy ending and he made it perfectly clear that it was a friends with benefits relationship. 

Everytime he got close to someone it ended up in hurt and death. It’s the reason why he and Cassie never worked out, or why he had to walk away from Lisa. He knew he would never be able to get anything real and that’s why it was easy with you. No feelings or strings attached and you knew about the Supernatural so you understood the life. 

Everything went well except you broke the number one rule of your friends with benefits relationship. You grew real feelings. Of course you wouldn’t say anything to Dean, because having him as a friend was better than not having him as anything at all. 

“I just… I don’t know how to move forward. Trying so hard to save the world everyday and knowing it’s all on our shoulders is putting so much pressure on me. The clock is ticking and we’re running out of time. Jo and Ellen are dead because of us, Bobby can’t walk because of us…at his point I feel as if the world would be a better place without me” Your eyes welled up with tears and you were desperately trying to push them down. 

“Hey hey hey, c’mere…” He cooed gently and pulled you into him. You turned to face him and wrapped your arms around his torso while burying your face into the crock of his neck. 

He felt the tears sliding against his skin and his heart broke at the silent sobs that racked your body. He was so in love with you and it terrified him. He fell in love with you at the first hello. His past relationships never worked out but he couldn’t hide his adoration for you. He didn’t want to see you get hurt or to lose you so he figured innocent flirting and hooking up would do no harm. 

You meant way more to him than just a hookup. He was scared as fuck to tell you especially now. If he told you how he really felt knowing his luck you would die on him tomorrow. 

“Sweetheart, you have no idea how wrong you are..” He says softly. “The world would be a worse place without you in it. It would most likely already be destroyed if you weren’t here. No, this isn’t easy and it takes a toll on me too every single day. But I know for a damn fact without you, me, Sam and Bobby..it.. It wouldn’t be half the world it is. No, things aren’t the best with Bobby but unfortunately in our line of work it’s unpredictable and anything can happen at anytime. I really thought I would be dead by now and here I am at 30 alive and kicking. We’re doing our best and I can’t promise that any of us are going to make it through it, but I know for a fact we’re going to stop the apocalypse. If we go down, then we’re going to go down together and swinging…”

Your silent cries turned into tears, which eventually turned into occasional sniffles as he spoke softly. He always knew the right things to say to make you feel better. “Thank you…” You sniffle quietly and he wraps his arms around you tighter. 

“I wish our lives were different sweetheart, because I would love to be normal with you…white picket fence with a dog and some kids..”

You look up at him and the amount of vulnerability in his features made your heart flutter. “I want that more than anything too De…I have strong feelings for you and it scares the shit out of me…”

“I, I feel the same way. I want to use the L word so much…because you deserve nothing more than to hear it every day…but I can’t. M’ scared to shit that if I tell you you’ll be taken from me and I can’t…” He took a deep breath. 

“It’s okay De. I understand.” 

“C’mere.”

You snuggled deep into him as much as you could while burying your face into his neck once more. He placed a kiss to the top of your head while wrapping his arms around you snugly. 

“If somehow we do make it out of this…things will be different. I promise.” He spoke and now you had a reason to want to make it through this and live.

[finisnihil]

So. I think. I may have figured out the significance of the red text in Penacony’s quest line and it’s relation to Acheron. Spoilers ahead for Penacony

First, let’s establish the connections and contexts in which red text is used in Penacony. The first time we experience it is when we meet Acheron.

During this initial conversation, Acheron tells us something extremely important.

Acheron easily forgets things UNLESS they are tied to emotional response.

When we see the red text used going forward it’s typically through emotional recollection.

Acheron asks if we have met before because it feels like we have. When she talks about her interactions Black Swan and her old friend she never recalls details like their facial features, their names, nothing like that, she only remembers the atmosphere of the interaction and how it made her feel.

When we see the red text pop up again it’s during exploration of the Dreamscape Reverie

In both these instances the red text is denoting emotion, experience.

This tape we find, it's extremely important.

When you turn it in to a member of the Bloodhound Family he informs you that the tapes are associated withe the assault of Sweet Dreams Troupe and a corruption of their "consciousness". He then gives an interesting description of their effect

.

The use of the term "tapes" is not a coincidence and I think I have the anwser.

It's the Stone Tapes Theory.

For those unaware, the Stone Tapes Theory is the belief that "ghosts" as we know them are actually recorded memories. During traumatic or emotional events, the mental impression seeps into objects like the stones of a house and the memories of the events get "recorded" in the object like a tape, and it's believed it can be "replayed" if interacted with in a certain way (it's the premise of a movie called Last Night in Soho which is an excellent watch if you want to look into the concept more).

The objects attacked were ones typically in a state of being inanimate and the attacks disrupted the impressions they already carried. They disrupt the mental state and emotions of the living because the living get sucked into the "replay" of the event. The term "phantasmagoria" in relation to the Dreamscape is used in the letter with the tape, which is a term for dream-like visions or illusions, typically seen in a half-concious or sleeping state.

How does Acheron connect to all of this?

In a previous analysis of mine, I talk about Acheron's connections to death and her possible role as a psychopomp. Death and Sleep are connected in many folklores across many cultures as Sleep is seen as a temporary stae of Death.

The Dreamscape has many allusions to being an afterlife or place of death beyond having the "Death" nightmare creature.

Souls are gathered in the Dreamscape and when you talk to many NPCs it's a shock to realize they're actually dead and their memory is being stored in the Dreamscape like the Stone Tape Theory. Chadwick, Lesley Dean, etc. And these are the quests that are shown in the Fate's Atlas. They're important. We access their memories connected to their fate using an inanimate object that holds significance to their specific situation.

Sparkle is used to reiterate that death isn't permanent in the Dreamscape but I don't think it's just because you can wake up, it's also because the "tape" can be rewound and replayed from the start.

Acheron was picked out from the start by Black Swan as interesting. She was her first dance. Acheron also shows to be able to navigate the Dreamscape very well on her own. The mingling of memory and death is significant because I think Acheron is serving as a psychopomp leading souls out of their Stone Tapes. Stopping them from being rewound. Her sword has a red eye and she sees the world in black, white, and red. The living, the dead, and Stone Tapes. This comes into conflict with Black Swan, who as a Memokeeper, would be striving to preserve those Stone Tapes. Sam burning entities in the Stone Tapes could be bad because he's destroying the tapes with those still inside them while Acheron is trying to guide the souls out.

Penacony has a big clock theme with an area of the Reverie even commenting that the clock doesn't work because time stands still in a dream. The different areas of the Dreamscape are called Moments. These "Moments" are just Stone Tapes.

Do you know what witness marks are? They've been symbolic in horror media like Mike Flanagan's adaptation of The Haunting of Hill House. They're scratches or dents in antique clocks left behind where pieces may have moved or been stationed and are used by clockmakers to help restore or wind antique clocks. The founder of Penacony as it is now is the Watchmaker. Acheron is a witness mark. All the special guests are. The Watchmaker's legacy is whoever can use the witness marks to fix the big clock of the Reverie and smooth out the disruptions in the harmony of life and death, these Stone Tapes.

Feel free to add your thoughts, mwah!