#statistically GREAT chances lmao

[rebrandedbard]

Neil Gaiman noticed me 🥺

[shirefantasies]

This is kind of dumb but I gotta ask could you write about the hobbits with a reader is quite a bit shorter than them? Like a bit below their shoulder kinda short? I know it’s and off request but I gotta ask. Thank you and I really love all your writing by the way. I start smiling and kicking my feet every time you post something lmao ❤️❤️❤️

Nah, it’s not dumb! I mean statistically it seems like female hobbits are shorter than guys just like in the other races so that makes sense! Reader is a beautiful hobbit lass :) posting again so soon because I woke up with some distressing stuff happening surgery wise & I need some fluff ok 😔

Little Things- The Hobbits x Shorter!F!Hobbit!Reader

Frodo

✧ When he invited you on one of Bilbo’s little out-of-town adventures, the first place he wanted to take you was the bookshop, and that was before he realized how adorable you looked standing on your tiptoes trying to reach the higher shelves, some of which Frodo could help you pluck from and others he needed a ladder for too.

✧ Never lets you lift a finger when your family hosts dinners, rising and insisting that you’ve done plenty in preparation, let him at least get down the dishes and serve you up. Besides, he remembers all your favorites and dishes you extra!

✧ The way his hands run through your hair upon every embrace.

✧ As winter draws near, he enlists members of his family to craft a pair of gloves perfectly in your size, presenting them to you before the first snow and gently aiding you in pulling the soft warmth on, eyes shining at your gratitude.

✧ Comfortingly rests his hand upon your shoulder, which he can't help but thinking is the perfect reach away, whenever he sees concern bloom across your beautiful features.

✧ Feels heat rush to your cheeks when your smaller hand rests upon his, not quite covering it but blanketing it in the greatest warmth nonetheless.

Sam

✧ Sam hasn’t a strong preference for height, so you won’t see so much of a difference in the way he’s attracted to you…

✧ …you will see it in how much he loves the way you make him feel needed! He gets the softest smile on his face when you ask him to help you reach things.

✧ One day he sees you carrying a sunflower that’s even taller than you and his heart bursts with the realization that you’re his sunshine, you’re all he wants.

✧ Jumps between you and danger any chance he can get- even things as small as an apple tumbling off a cart toward your head have him rushing forth to catch them, check if you are ok.

✧ Insists on helping you put your trellis up, a great arch marking the entrance to your beautiful little home, doing all the hardest parts for you and letting you focus on your flowers.

✧ Loves the way your hands reach up for his shoulders to take him up into hugs!

Merry

✧ Teases you just a bit, occasionally resting an arm gently stop your head just to enjoy your reaction.

✧ Always lends you a hand to help you climb up the farmers’ fences, making sure you’ve gone over before he does anything else.

✧ Pulls you a little extra close to his chest when he hugs you, a hand going around your waist and his head resting atop yours.

✧ One of his favorite memories is of the day you two passed a field a few days after a new lamb was born, her young shepherd letting you hold her in your arms. Your gentle smile and how big even such a small creature looks in your grasp just has him softer than anything. Merry can't help himself imagining the sight of an even smaller animal or maybe even a baby.

✧ Lifts you up with both hands around your middle after daring you to try and reach the highest-hanging delicacies of your favorite apple tree.

✧ Feeling bold, he'll take the opportunity to reach up beneath your chin, tilting your head up to meet his gaze.

Pippin

✧ “That’s quite a nice ring. Can I see if it fits me?” “I doubt it, but you can sure try.” Pippin finds it’s a bit too small for his ring finger. “Guess so. My hands aren’t so much bigger, are they? Let me see.” Holds up his hand palm-out just to feel the press of your slightly smaller one against him, smiling with the contact.

✧ Stops by randomly with treats in hand for you, especially things like tartlets from his cousins' house or little cupcakes because even if you don't realize it, those small sweet treats never fail to remind him of you!

✧ It flusters him that much more if he trips in your presence, bringing you, the smaller of your duo, to be the one catching him. At the feeling of your arms around him, though, he will never complain.

✧ He always stays by your side, even to the point of you two falling asleep next to each other. Your head droops to his shoulder, and his rests atop yours.

✧ Forgets himself in his typical habits, slinging an arm around your shoulders when he gets too focused on the topic at hand; when he comes to, he cannot help noticing what a perfect height you are for the pose!

✧ Lets his head fall down the little distance to connect your foreheads when you share an especially fond goodbye or comforting embrace.

Bilbo

✧ Becomes quite the guard dog around you! Will never tolerate a single slight to your character, which has shown to be the very highest thank him very much.

✧ Shyly walks by your hobbit hole when he knows you’ll be picking from your orange tree, hoping you’ll invite him to join you. Fetches the higher-up ones and only keeps them at your insistence. Marvels at the size difference of your hands as you hand him a jar of the marmalade you recently made.

✧ Loves playing up the heights of things in all his wild tales that much more, whether they are trolls or towering cliffs, because surely they are many times your size, right? He thinks with a grin as he spins his yarns.

✧ Gets pushed into a dance with you at some party or another; glancing down to meet your eyes, he cannot help darting a brief gaze to your lips, flushing at their proximity and the feeling of your hands in his.

✧ The first time you grab him into a hug, his hands freeze for a moment before he finally lets them settle at the small of your back, daring to rub a soothing circle there.

✧ "Here," he gets your attention quietly, reaching down, "let me get this for you." Gently his fingers brush your hair, removing the leaf that had gotten tangled in a curl.

Taglist: @lokilover476 @fuckyoumakeart @mossthebogwitch @kilibaggins @ibabblealot @joonies-word @stormchaser819 | Reply/Ask/Message to join!

[clare-with-no-i]

20 q's for fic writers

thank you sooo so much for tagging me @kay-elle-cee I unfortunately could not approach this in a completely earnest fashion due to who I am as a person, so everyone please take this slightly ersatz set of answers with all of the love I intend…which is a lot I swear…

AO3 Username: clarewithnoi (pronounced 'clare with no eye')

1. How many works do you have on A03? lol I keep orphaning stories when they annoy me but for now 37 (I think?)

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 403,419…what is this word city

3. What fandoms do you write for? Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, others which I have not published lol

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

not the statistics page!!!!!!! john mulaney voice that's the thing I'm sensitive about!!!!!!

one long day (all my love will make you shake) at 1,151 WOW my god I did not realize it had surpassed 1k!!! did I know that? holy shit!

I will carry you, always at 873 ok this is also shocking but I do know that my they-lived AUs tend to be more popular and they're older so they've had time to accumulate hits

foreigner's god at 701 still can't believe this <3

theogony at 682 (!!)

growing pains at 675 another they-lived AU! I really carved out a niche early on

5. Do you respond to comments? don't look at me…I always want to…I swear I just get overwhelmed…put the gun down please…

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? uhhhh jesus idk, probably the derelict art of letting go? I don't write a lot of angst but I guess that one is on the sadder side

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? foreigner's god! or I will carry you always! in one of them I contend with reincarnation and shared grief and second chances at life. in the other one they hook up in the DADA classroom. so it's a toss-up

8. Do you get hate on fics? not really, and given the number of public fights I've had on this account you'd think that people would take their dislike of me to ao3 more often, but everyone's been remarkably charitable in that regard. thanks guys <3

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? only if I can exorcise personal trauma through it. or if it's 2020 and I'm dissociating in my studio apartment.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? no and no one say theogony or I'm turning this bus around

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? yessiree and it was not pleasant!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? yes! a few! the ones with my permission were lovely. the ones without my permission not as much.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? naur…

14. What’s your all time favorite ship? it's like a three-way tie between jily, percabeth, and zelink tbh! but I've mainly read jily fic in the past few years I think. but this answer can change dependent on me developing a new hyperfixation lmao

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? the last time I answered this question I did it as a joke and then I wrote theogony about it so I'm going to choose peace and just plead the fifth here lest I commit to another wip that'll take three years

16. What are your writing strengths? I do a lot of (an excess of) research, I'm good at description, I am funny when I want to be, I've had some really good prose moments if I do say so myself (I do)

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I am structurally a very weak writer, I can't be succinct, I don't have a great literature background so I never really know what I'm in conversation with and have limited points of reference for writing, I am very bad at writing characters who are subtle about their emotions/romantic feelings, I submit to time pressure and rush myself, the list goes on

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I've always wanted to write a fic in Spanish omgggg

19. First fandom you wrote for? either Zelink or Percabeth when I was like 12 lol.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? theogony!

tagging @thequibblah yes I know you've been tagged already. cope <3 and @mipwrites go get 'em champ

[cartoonedin]

thanks for the like bestie here is all the horatio lore i can semi-coherently elucidate at this time. tl;dr the name is a pain in the ass and so is his unicorn

just a city boy born and raised in south detroit. except there is no south detroit so he was born and raised in north windsor or something lmao. knew nothing but asphalt, polluted air, and general metropolitan bustle until the invitation to unicorn academy made its way to his doorstep. many a dog pissed on the box while he was debating whether or not it was a bomb. 

parents were raised in a doomsday cult. this isn’t too relevant he just values the truth a lot because of it. which is exactly what you want in a student at the school of suspending one’s disbelief right

slightly more relevant he has a very strong fear of heights. palpitations if he’s more than a centimetre away from the emergency call button on any given elevator. he dropped a full dollar out his window at age five and has been traumatised ever since. which is exactly what you want in a student at the school of suspending one over various perilous landscapes right

back to being irrelevant he’s good at maths but only because he’s got a hundred spreadsheets open at any given time to minmax mmorpgs. consistent regional fourth placer in competitions and perfectly content with that.

but anyways! he did not enjoy the ride over and nearly fell out several times. nearly fell over seeing more than five trees in his periphery. actually fell into an infinite conga line of negative thoughts upon finding out that his unicorn had the power of flight. got into emerald dorm and half-jokes that it’s because the hue of the gem matches the ever-rising bile in his throat

hated the riding jacket because it made him look like a lawyer. he got one anyways because he is not a main character and has more positive feelings about the piss yellow tie.

sooooo adamant that his hair turned a dusky periwinkle. it’s grey just say it’s grey (because statistically speaking there’s no way all the kids get cool hair colours and streak placements) (but mostly because i think it’s funny)

also his unicorn is named sky and he spent the entire year trying to convince people it’s the other way around. probably would’ve done so even if his unicorn’s name was cirrocumulus cloud or bird poop

this should go without saying but he had so many life-and-death moments before the final test. like month three and he was still mistaking the winkle wash for pepto bismol. if sky jumped over anything higher than a twig he had a 50/50 chance of jumping into the nearest mud puddle to save himself from a concussion. sorry buddy there’s no b plot to jump start your education! 

had never seen a school library in his life prior to unicorn academy. honestly didn't see much of its library either he slept through 9/10 study halls

got the hang of things eventually. what things? well. let’s just say. things because i’m not googling any more horse photos jesus christ

at the very least he started treating his unicorn like a friend instead of a great scary beast moments away from feasting on his beautiful dusky periwinkle hair <3

it was the day before the final test. everything was going great. he had eaten real food for breakfast without tipping the dwerpins with the last of his birthday money. he hadn’t thought about how his league of legends ranking had to be dropping so hard in a full five minutes. he had, however, been standing behind sky when a bird somewhere in a five-kilometre vicinity made a sound loud enough to incite a strong kick. 

teachers called it a broken tailbone. classmates may or may not have called it a broken butt. horatio called it the best reason yet to drop out of school. sky could have another rider, and many more riders after that to abandoned boot, but he couldn’t have another tailbone. and even if he could, he wasn’t certain he could stomach the experience. especially seeing as he had an especially bruised stomach.

spent summer with a walker under the watchful eyes of his utterly befuddled parents. but he got his xbox back so everyone was happy! except his unicorn probably (she gave her next rider a 10x harder time out of guilt)

became an accountant after graduating from the tri-state’s most mediocre university and, in later adulthood, believed his time at unicorn academy was a really long lsd trip from some really bad halloween candy. he adopted a child after getting promoted to managerial accountant at some insurance firm, appeased her grandmother by naming her macbeth instead of bethany, and lived the rest of his life blissfully ignorant to the existence of unicorns as anything other than his daughter’s favourite piece of fantastical decor. when he’d gotten so good at making up stories about them was something of a mystery.

[sadistic-softie]

Ok, please don't fucking laugh at me but I only just now found out that a lot more people actually genuinely care what's "in" and what's "out" than I initially thought.

I'm gonna fucking combust...like...i thought only children, Disney characters, and confused advertisers cared, but no...it's actually way more than that. There are people of ALL ages desperately following trends like they *need* the...I fucking thought "trend" was just how people described what new generations are collectively talking about or exploring or behaving like...seriously...I thought it was just for pointing out behavioral trends in youth and media and such.

I never followed trends and "in" stuff in general just to "get with the times" growing up (I do fall into some things "naturally" unconsciously here and there but I don't seek it) because I saw no point in it and don't care, for one, but also because most people growing up around me in school and such didn't care either and if they did they were seen as "weird" and "annoying" because those kids had a reputation for being either boring or confusing because all they did was just flaunt their "in"ness (???lmao) all the time instead of talking or having fun so maybe that's why??

Idk how to explain it. I see (saw?) "trend" as a statistic of most common behavior and shared information that you may or may not "participate" in depending on personal taste and random chance that it was something up your alley or was fitting to you. This rather than like...a "goal" but...I did not realize just how much a lot of people really do hold themselves to these things and take them very very seriously.

Maybe seriously isn't the word because it's not a deadpan expression life or death type topic but they feel bound to it...like...to the point of getting actually genuinely *embarrassed* by the idea of themselves or someone else not following trends...like as if they didn't follow them, everyone would suddenly hate them and they would be carrying a great shame or something??? Idk. I'm just confused. Can anyone else relate to this??? I'm so weirded out by this rn I don't know what to think of it. It's common knowledge, I guess, but it kind of blew my mind today.

[windvexer]

lmao did that anom ask a pick-a-card question specifically for me?? i have been agonizing over the topic for months now, and have been discussing it today. let me take the chance to ask your opinion

first if all i know pacs work because ive seen them work, and some great readers do them! but on the other side of the coin i have also seen how toxic and unhealthy of an environment they can create. i feel like no method of divination breeds as much delusion and obession like pacs can. “take what resonates” ok people take what they like to hear “you might have messages in multiple piles” reader just want better yt statistics, people pick and choose in even worse of a way. how many times i have seen people pick and choose what they resonate with and come to the conclusion that their disgusting abusive ex is actually going through a spiritual awakening. like holy shit. not to mention the readings stop being accurate as quick as you start watching a lot of them.

all that said… i would love to do pick a card readings on youtube. im a talkative gemini tarot reader, it sounds do fun! i was thinking that a way to at least minimize these negative side of the craft would be to use an “empty” pile in each reading. „sorry, no message for you this time, not a punishment, not a bad thing, just no message. maybe the universe wants you to think about the previous reading you got? do you remember it or were you mindlessly binging (wouldnt put it like that lol) ? here! have a little journaling exercise, lets do it together.” ok basically idk how exactly it would look like but i hope you get it. does this sound solid for you? i would also like to provide people with a template for taking notes during a reading to discourage mindless binging and actually help people get something out of it. yeesh long message

If we were friends chatting over tea, I'd recommend that you explore creating PACs as a way to enjoy practicing your craft and gaining experience in developing your own reading frameworks - to do this project for yourself.

You've identified problems common to this activity, and you want to experiment with making your own channel that corrects those problems. I think that's a good thing.

But I think it's all got to come back to you, because you are never going to actually be able to control how people interact with your content. I think that as long as you are working on PAC content because it's fun, and you like doing it, then it's a good project for you. And I applaud your interest in seeking to limit negative side-effects.

But I think if you are going into this with a mindset of, "my PACs will be good because I will teach people to interact with them in the right way," you're going to end up having a bad time before all is said and done. I think your best bet is to do the readings in a way you feel comfortable with, in a way you feel is morally correct, and in a way that is fun for you. The rest is out of your hands.

For some years I have been providing "auxiliary" information alongside the main reading content that I hope encourages self-reflection, or provides suggestions for actionable steps, and so forth. I am not sure if that's the kind of thing you mean when you refer to journaling and note-taking, but if so I do think its a very useful thing to add to a reading. In my opinion it forces the reader to produce stronger readings that can actually support personal reflection.

[whatiwillsay]

this is sort of just a brain dump about the ticket situation?

i’ve reached out to everyone - relatives i haven’t spoken to since i came out, relatives who aren’t even relatives anymore due to nasty divorces, my own fucking boss - and no one has a fucking capital one card. it just feels so stressful bc this is a once in a lifetime event and i feel like this will also be the only moment in my life where i am financially able to indulge in a once in a lifetime thing like this since i’m probably going to have kids soon. and even if i do everything fucking right - even if i track down the elusive capital one card or sell my soul to the fucking devil - statistically i still probably won’t even have a chance of getting tickets.

my great aunt met john paul ii back when he was pope and it was a life changing experience for her. the way she described it to me as a kid - that’s what i feel like this concert is going to mean for me. taylor is my john paul ii

and like a proper catholic i feel horrible guilt at even wanting taylor tickets, bc who the fuck am i to feel like seeing her live would be uniquely special for me so i’m ‘extra deserving’ or whatever. i’m in the same boat as all the other fans, which i should be in. and i’m not mad at taylor or anything, bc i totally respect her decision to not be super busy with a ton of tour dates. so there’s nothing specific i’m complaining about here really lmao. it’s just. weird having all of these feelings in me about these tickets 😅

omg fuck jpii but you can apply for a card yourself! or just get preregistered i’m sure you’ll get through.

[specialagentsergio]

rationalizations

rationalizations: a defense mechanism in which one makes up a false but reassuring explanation to explain their behavior and/or feelings to both themselves and others, thus avoiding the reality of why they are really acting or feeling as they do.

summary: You’re the psych evaluation for Spencer. You think he’s full of shit, so you refuse to sign his clearance form until he actually tells the truth.

pairing: spencer reid x f!reader

category: angst (happy ending)

content warnings: spencer’s canonical trauma, flashbacks, mentions of suicide and suicidal ideation, swearing

a/n: i wrote this for @imagining-in-the-margins‘ enemies to lovers event. it’s not my favorite trope, but one of the prompts sparked inspiration for me. i also took a good amount of inspiration from meredith’s various therapy scenes in grey’s anatomy, so if some of it feels familiar, that’s why! i swear i intended to make this cute and funny, but, well… here we are lmao.

word count: 3.6k

masterlist

Spencer throws his bag onto his desk with a frustrated huff. It thumps loudly, startling JJ at her desk across from his. She gives him a sympathetic look regardless. “Still not cleared yet?”

“No!” Forgetting that it’s wheeled, he drops himself into his chair. It skids backwards and he has to scramble to grab something to keep from falling out of it.

“Careful there,” JJ says, trying valiantly to suppress a laugh. “That psychologist's got you really worked up, huh?”

“I don’t know what she wants from me!” he complains. “It’s been nearly a month! Hotch’s ex-wife was murdered by an unsub, but they cleared him. I was only shot in the neck.”

“I mean, that’s still kind of a big deal,” she says. “You could’ve died, from the gunshot, or from the nurse that tried to kill you afterwards.”

“Speaking of that nurse,” he starts, “Garcia is the one who shot him and she’s been a wreck over it. She insisted on going to the guy’s execution. But the therapist cleared her!”

“Penelope’s not in the field,” JJ points out.

He crosses his arms. “Still. This isn’t the first time I’ve been shot. That possibility is part of the job. It’s not like it came out of nowhere and I was completely unprepared for it.”

“I don’t know what to tell you, Spence,” she says. “Just keep all of your appointments and I’m sure you’ll be cleared soon.”

He pulls a stack of papers on his desk towards him. Paperwork—one of the things he’s actually allowed to do. “I better be,” he mutters.

---

“And it was really scary, you know?” Spencer wipes at his eyes with a tissue. “Not knowing if I was going to live or die.”

“Mm-hmm.”

He takes a deep breath. “But… it’s over now. The preacher who shot me died in the same shootout. Owen McGregor, the leader of the corrupt deputies, died later that night, in another shootout. And Greg Baylor, the one who posed as a nurse and tried to kill me, was sentenced to death row and he’s gone now, too.”

His psychologist makes a note on the paper in front of her, but doesn’t say anything, so he continues.

“I… I feel better now, just letting that out.” He takes a new tissue and dries his nose. “I feel ready now. Ready to go back to work.”

She nods slowly, considering him. But she doesn’t even look towards her desk where the clearance form sits, frustrating him to no end. After five minutes of silence, he breaks.

“You can’t be serious.”

She raises an eyebrow. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I’ve been coming to these sessions for over a month, and I’m still not cleared to be in the field. I…” He musters up more tears and makes sure his voice wavers during his next words. “I just don’t know what you want? I’ve tried everything.”

“No, you haven’t,” she says plainly.

He blinks in surprise, sending some of the crocodile tears down his cheeks. “What?”

She crosses her legs. “You’re full of shit.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re not being honest with me, and I don’t think you’re being honest with yourself either,” she says. “You’re a great actor. I can see how you’ve gotten clearances easily before. But that stops with me.”

Spencer stares at her. “I don’t understand.”

She moves her notebook to the side. “What happened in Texas isn’t the first time your life’s been in danger. Why do you think that is?”

“Wh—that’s part of my job,” he argues, fake crying long since forgotten.

“Not to the extent that you take it. I’ve read your file,” she says. “You take unnecessary risks with regularity.”

The tissues crumple in his hand as he clenches it. “I do not.”

“Let’s go back to the beginning.”

“The beginning of what?”

“Of your career.” Yet she doesn’t take out his file, or look at her notes. She speaks from memory. “2005. The BAU is assisting with a hostage situation. You go into the train, posing as someone who is there to remove a microchip from the unsub, but the first thing you do? You take off your bulletproof vest.”

“Okay, clearly you don’t understand what the situation was,” Spencer cuts in. “Ted Bryar was suffering from a psychotic break. He was somewhat unpredictable, and he told me to take off the vest.”

“And you just listened?”

“He—he had a gun, and was threatening both me and the other passengers with it!” he says. “What was I supposed to do, not listen?”

“Uh, yeah,” she replies. “You easily played into his delusions just a few minutes later to distract him. Why not do that to keep yourself safe?”

“I was twenty-four and was running on adrenaline,” he says defensively. “And it was my first time doing something like that. You can’t expect me to think of everything.”

“You’re right, I can’t,” she agrees. “So let’s jump forward a few years. How about the time you approached a teenager who was wielding an assault rifle with no protection, not even your own firearm?” she challenges.

“You mean Owen Savage? That was a unique situation,” he protests. “I knew I could talk him down.”

“No, you didn’t. You thought you had a good chance, but there’s no way to be one hundred percent sure of that. He was volatile, and on a killing spree,” she counters. “You didn’t know if you’d succeed--”

“I did!” He startles himself by unconsciously raising his voice, but he doesn’t apologize. “I did, because….”

“Because you related to him,” she fills in. “And that’s fine. Having empathy for an unsub doesn’t suggest something’s wrong in and of itself. But you still put yourself, and the rest of your team, in danger, didn’t you?”

He crosses his arms. “I got that lecture from Hotch when it happened, okay?”

“So then why’d you confront an unsub alone a few years later in Miami?” she asks. “You didn’t even tell anyone where you were going. You left your vest behind and just ran off.”

“I was having a head—wait, how do you even know that happened?” he questions. “It wasn’t in the report.”

“Well, first of all, you just confirmed it,” she points out, and he wants to kick himself. “Secondly, I can read between the lines.”

“I was having a headache,” he repeats. “I wasn’t thinking all that clearly. I just knew Julio’s life was in immediate danger, so I went to help him.”

“Uh-huh. More recently,” she says, brushing past his excuse, “You confronted your girlfriend’s stalker without your vest or gun.”

Spencer’s getting angry now. “I was trying to save Maeve. She asked me to leave them behind.”

“And you simply listened. Do you see the pattern I’m drawing here, Dr. Reid?” she asks. “These are just a few of the instances that stand out. Time and time again, you put yourself in unnecessary danger. So I’ll ask you again. Why do you think that is?”

Spencer looks over her—really looks over her, trying to understand what she’s getting at. “Are… are you suggesting that I’m suicidal?” he asks quietly.

She looks him straight in the eye. “You don’t act like someone who wants to be alive.”

It’s like she set off a bomb in his brain. Memories, and the feelings attached to them, emerge—Elle handcuffed to a seat, a teenager with a rifle, a blinding headache, Maeve and blood on the warehouse floor.

“Here’s what I see,” she says. “I see a man who’s been through so, so much. Your mother is mentally ill, your father left--”

His father is packing a suitcase. Spencer doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do or say, so he falls back on what he knows.

“Statistically, children who grow up in two-parent households attain three more years of higher education than children from single-parent households.”

It doesn’t help. “We’re not statistics, Spencer.”

“Your file says she’s staying at an institution, and with your father out of the picture, I can only assume you were the one who had her admitted--”

“Spencer, please don’t do this to me!” she cries as she’s escorted out of the house by Bennington Sanitarium’s transport staff.

“A few years into your work here at the FBI, you were kidnapped, tortured and drugged--”

He’s tired and cold and his whole body aches. Tobias—the real Tobias—looms over him with a syringe.

“Please. I don’t want it,” he pleads of his captor. “I don’t want it, please.”

The needle punctures his skin regardless.

“—you were held hostage by a cult leader--”

Emily sits across from him on the plane with a black eye. “What Cyrus did to me is not your fault.”

He pretends to agree.

“—you went through the death and reappearance of Agent Prentiss--”

He’s tried to make it clear to Jennifer that he wants to be left alone, but she won’t stop trying to talk about it with him, and he’s had enough.

“I came to your house for ten weeks in a row crying over losing a friend, and not once did you have the decency to tell me the truth.”

“—and your girlfriend was shot in front of you.”

“Who’s Thomas Merton? Who is he?” Diane demands, gun pressed against Maeve’s head.

“He’s the one thing you can never take from us,” Maeve replies, and Spencer’s heart drops. Thomas Merton is Maeve’s way of saying goodbye—she’s giving up.

“Wait!” he cries out, but it’s too late.

“This is just some of the more traumatic stuff. And then there’s what happened last month, which is why you’re here. You present a face of not being bothered by all of this, because that’s what you’ve been doing all your life, but I think you are bothered. You really, really are. And you don’t want to admit to anyone just how much it all has affected you. Maybe you don’t even want yourself to know.” Her expression and tone of voice are certain.

Spencer can’t take it anymore. The whirlwind of emotions and memories is overwhelming.

“The number of times you’ve almost died is staggering--”

“Yeah, and sometimes I wish I had!” He glares at her, breathing heavily. “Is that what you wanted to hear?”

But she doesn’t seem intimidated or alarmed at all. She leans back in her armchair. “Now we’re getting somewhere.”

The response only serves to make him angrier. She questioned him relentlessly and made him admit something he swore in the dark hours of sleepless nights that he’d never think again, never voice, let alone admit to anyone. She forced it out of him, forced. She made him say it against his will.

So why does he feel a sense of relief?

“I…” Tears well up in his eyes—real ones this time. “I’m done,” he chokes out.

He pushes himself off of the couch and out the door, slamming it shut behind him.

---

He storms in Hotch’s office and demands to see a different psychologist. But she was one step ahead of him—a few hours before the appointment, she had emailed Hotch and told him that under no circumstances should Spencer be allowed to get a clearance from someone else.

“And you’re going to believe her?” he cries.

“She’s doing her job, Reid.”

“You barely know her! You’ve known me for a decade!”

“Yes, I have,” Hotch agrees. “And you’ve told me yourself that you’ve fooled psychologists and therapists before. So if this one is saying you’re not ready yet, I’m inclined to believe her.”

Spencer just stares at him, but as usual, Hotch doesn’t blink.

“Unbelievable,” Spencer eventually mutters.

“Take the rest of the day off,” Hotch replies, glancing down at fists Spencer hadn’t realized he was clenching.

“Fine.”

Too agitated to stand in the elevator, he takes the stairs. As he stomps down them, he swears he’ll never go back to her office, even if it means never going into the field again.

A week passes, then two, and he hasn’t seen the psychologist since. But he doesn’t feel any better—he actually feels worse. It’s like her words broke a dam in his mind, in his gut, and feelings of unease and uncertainty won’t pass. It keeps him up at night. Her words echo in his head. “You don’t act like someone who wants to be alive.”

Spencer’s had yet another sleepless night and is struggling not to doze off at his desk despite the coffee he’s drinking. He stands up with the intention of splashing some water from the bathroom sink on his face, but his feet take him somewhere else.

He stares at the nameplate on the door. He swore he’d never go back, yet he feels compelled to knock.

It only takes her a few moments to answer. “Dr. Reid. Can I help you?” she asks.

“I…” He sighs. “Are you busy?”

“No. Come on in.” She steps to the side, opening the door wider to let him pass. He sits down on the couch.

She waits patiently. She doesn’t rush him. She lets him speak first.

He wrings his hands in his lap, staring down at them. “Something you said is bothering me.”

“What was it?”

“About… living,” he admits quietly. “I… I think you might have been right.”

When he gets the courage to glance up at her, he finds a soft smile on her face. “Would you like to talk about it?”

Spencer hadn’t realized he was expecting judgment and disdain until it didn’t happen. His shoulders slump down in relief. “Yeah,” he says. “Yeah, I think I would.”

---

“You’re still thinking about her, aren’t you?”

Spencer looks up from his paperwork, slightly out of it, to find Derek watching him. His coworker had, indeed, caught him thinking about her again. His psychologist. Well, former psychologist. After his second session back with her, she’d handed over a clearance form and a referral to a therapist outside the bureau to see long-term.

“And you better follow up with that,” she’d told him, the corner of her mouth turning up despite her serious tone of voice. “I’ll know if you don’t.”

He’d promised that he would, and had followed through. But despite the progress he was making with the new therapist, he was feeling a little disappointed that he didn’t get to see her anymore. He only saw her in passing, sometimes in the elevator or walking down the hallways of the building. They would exchange hellos, she would ask how he was doing, then give him a little wave as she left. Each time his heart would skip a beat, and he’d feel an urge to follow her to wherever she was going.

Yet he hadn’t quite realized why he seemed to be preoccupied with her until a dream he had a few weeks ago—a dream in which he found himself kissing her. Despite being alone in his bedroom, he’d woken up feeling embarrassed. He promised himself that he would put her out of his mind. Having a crush on his psychologist? It was ridiculous.

But then he saw her in the elevator a few days later and he couldn’t help but analyze her body language. It was open, and she twirled her hair around a finger while she looked at him to ask him how he was. A few other people entered the elevator on the next floor, but her attention remained on him. They were subtle signs, but signs that he recognized nonetheless—signs of attraction. And once he started seeing them, he couldn’t stop.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Spencer tells Derek, picking back up the pen he hadn’t noticed he dropped.

“You can’t pull that on me, kid,” he replies. “It’s your psychologist. You can’t stop thinking about her, can you?”

Spencer sighs. “So what if I can’t?”

“So go ask her out already!” Derek says like it’s obvious.

“You don’t think that’s just a little inappropriate?”

“You’re not seeing her as a client anymore, are you?” he points out. “Go for it, kid. You’ll regret it if you don’t.”

Spencer takes the advice—as soon as Derek said it, he knew he was right. He would regret not taking a chance on her and the connection he felt. Sure, she’d helped him with therapy, but it went deeper than that. It feels like she knows him.

He leaves the bullpen ten minutes early that evening, hoping to catch her before she leaves for the day. On her doorstep, he feels just as nervous as he did on the day he admitted that she was right, but it’s a different kind of nervous. An excited nervous. He knocks on the door.

She’s surprised when she seems him. He watches as her pupils dilate, and it boosts his confidence. “Dr. Reid. Can I help you?”

“You can. I’d like to talk,” he says.

“Oh. Well, I guess I could do that,” she says. “I thought things were going well with the therapist I referred you to, though.”

He shakes his head. “No, I don’t mean I want an appointment.”

Her eyebrows come together in confusion. “Okay, then, what do you want?”

Spencer doesn’t hesitate. “I want to take you out to dinner.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“I really like you, and I think we’re meant to be together,” he replies, voice softening a bit.

She pauses before answering. When she does, her voice is gentle. “Dr. Reid, sometimes a medical professional’s care can start to feel like affection over a period of time, but--”

“No one has ever listened to me like you do,” he interrupts.

“That’s my job,” she points out.

“I’ve seen therapists before, but none of them have been like you,” he counters. “You understand me.”

She sighs. “Well, I’m glad I was a good fit and was able to help you. But that doesn’t mean that I see you as anything more than a client.”

“You’re lying.”

“Excuse me?”

“You do feel something more for me,” he says firmly, but then backtracks a little. “Well, I know you’re attracted to me at least.”

She blinks and shakes her head slightly, take aback. “Dr. Reid, this is not appropriate--”

“Please call me Spencer,” he says, then jumps into his explanation. “See, when we’re attracted to someone, our bodies display involuntary signals, and I’ve seen you do some of them when you’re around me. Whenever we run into each other here, your body will turn a little towards me and you’ll play with your hair. Your attention is almost entirely focused on me. And, when you see me, your pupils dilate. They did it when you opened the door just a few minutes ago. Oh, and I’m attracted to you, by the way,” he adds as he realizes how one-sided he’s been. “I imagine my pupils probably dilate when I see you, too.”

Her mouth opens and closes a few times, like she wants to speak but doesn’t know what to say. She looks flustered, and he wonders if maybe he’s pushed it too far or said too much, but he can’t turn back now. “So, please, let me take you out,” he says quietly. “Just… just give it a chance.”

She bites her lip and looks at the ground. There’s a crease between her eyebrows, which he’s come to learn means she’s thinking. She speaks seriously when she looks back up. “If I go out with you, I can’t treat you anymore. If you ever need another evaluation or session, you’d have to get it from someone else.”

“I know,” he says. “I get along well with the therapist you referred me to, though. And having to get clearance from a different psychologist at the bureau is something I’m willing to give up in favor of getting to know you better.”

She considers him. “You’re serious about this,” she states.

It’s not a question, but he answers it anyways. “I am.”

She tilts her head to the side, eyes unfocusing as she ponders the situation. Eventually, she says, “Let me think about it.”

It’s not exactly the answer he was hoping for, but he’ll take it.

---

It’s only six PM, but Spencer is already exhausted. He unlocks his apartment door, fully intending to collapse onto his bed, but instead receives a pleasant surprise in the form of his girlfriend waiting for him on the couch. He can’t help but smile.

“Sweetie, what are you doing here?” he asks, then adds, “Not that I’m complaining.”

“Penelope told me it was a bit of a rough case,” she replies. “And I missed you.”

She holds out her arms and he takes the invitation, joining her on the couch and laying down between her legs, placing his head on her chest. “I missed you, too.”

Her next words are overly familiar. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Hey, we agreed to no therapy,” he says. “Something about I can’t be your client anymore?”

She huffs. “This isn’t therapy. This is being a good partner.”

Spencer smiles into the fabric of her shirt, snuggling in closer. “I know, I’m just teasing you. I don’t need to talk about the case,” he says, finally answering her original question. “I feel fine now that I’m here with you.”

She lets out a pleased hum and starts running her fingers through his hair. “I ordered take-out for dinner, by the way.”

“Where from?”

“You know where.”

A wide grin spreads across his face. She must have ordered take-out from the restaurant he took her to on their first date. He lifts his head to look her in the eye. “Aren’t you glad you said yes to me all those months ago?”

“Oh, I suppose,” she says with pretend annoyance, rolling her eyes.

Then she kisses him.

Spencer’s never been so happy to be alive.

---------------

tell me what you thought here!

please note that i DO NOT ENDORSE asking out your therapist/former therapist. this is fanfiction. thank you.

general taglist: @calm-and-doctor​ , @spencerreid9​

[lauras-collection]

i’ll find you | p.p. teaser

peter parker x fem!reader best friends to lovers soulmate au

|| Masterlist ||

Summary: This was not how you imagined finding out who your soulmate is. 

Words: 571 (idk how long the whole thing will end up being)

Warnings: none in the teaser but the whole fic will definitely have No Way Home Spoilers!!

A/N: I saw this soulmate system (?? is that what it’s called?) In another fic once but I don’t remember which it was and by whom :( but I def wanna say that it wasn’t my idea!! also the summary sucks because I don’t wanna put nwh spoilers in it lmao Feedback is always appreciated ❤️ 

“You know, statistically speaking most people meet their soulmate at college.” Ned says as he scrolls through his phone. “Are you excited to meet your soulmates? I definitely am.”

You glance at Peter while you rub your forearm. With great power comes great responsibility. Those are the words tattooed on your skin. They have been since you were thirteen. You don’t exactly know what they mean. Only that they mean a lot to your soulmate. Whoever they are. You don’t even know if you’ve met them yet. There’s a chance your soulmate doesn’t even know the words that will have significant meaning to them. Heck, you don’t even know what your soulmate could possibly have written on their arm.

Sometimes you find yourself daydreaming about Peter being your soulmate. He’s your favourite person in the world, and you can’t imagine anyone ever meaning more to you. But if he really was your soulmate, wouldn’t you feel it? Wouldn’t you just know? 

You’ve tried to make the words on his arms make sense to you. Tried to give them meaning for you. But it never worked. I’ll find you. Those are his words. Or rather the words of his soulmate. 

You blink rapidly when Peter runs his hand over his tattoo. You hadn’t even realised you’d been staring at it.

“Yeah,” Peter chuckles “I’m pretty excited. But who knows when I’ll find them. I just know that I will.” He smiles, and while it makes you happy —seeing him smile always does— it also stings a little, knowing he’ll someday meet someone who’s gonna be his world. But so will you, you have to keep reminding yourself.

“I still think your words are creepy.” Ned tilts his head, “What if your soulmate is actually a part of the mob?”

“Ohh a proper enemies to lovers story, with you being Spider-Man and stuff.” You give Peter a playful nudge. “Love me some good tropes.” You force a smile. Peter is about to say something when Ned’s phone gives off a high pitched alert. 

“What the-?” Ned’s eyebrows vanish under his hair. “Dude, that’s not good.” He turns the phone around so both of you can read. 

Spider-Man’s identity revealed!

And right below it is a picture of Peter. You reach out for him without taking your eyes off Ned’s phone. “Please tell me this isn’t real.” 

“Oh it’s very real.” Peter gets up quickly, his suit wrapping around his body within seconds. “Ned, are you okay getting home alone? I’ll take Y/N home.” 

“Yeah, sure. No problem.” 

You don’t even have time to question Peter before he sweeps you off your feet and swings the two of you off the school’s roof. 

“Peter, what the fuck?” You cling onto him as tightly as you can. Peter has never swung with you before. He’s scared of anyone seeing a connection between Spider-Man and the people he cares about. And being swung around town on a regular basis would definitely count as that. 

You get dizzy and feel a little nauseous, so you decide to close your eyes. This was definitely worse than any roller coaster you’ve ever been on. 

It’s only when you hear the sound of helicopters that you carefully open one eye. “Peter?” 

“What is it?” 

“I think we’re being chased.” 

Peter curses when he notices the helicopters. “Change of plans.” And then your body is jolted in a different direction.

let me know if you want to be tagged in this one!! :)

besties tag: @spidermanlondon​ ☆ @duskholland​ ☆ @heyhihellowhatsup0​ ☆ @annathesillyfriend​ ☆ @hazofmyheart​ ☆ @emilykjh ☆ @alinastarkrovs​ ☆ @sinisterspidey​ ☆ @lovebittenbyevans​ ☆ @miraclesoflove​ ☆ @seasidetom​ ☆ @selfcarecap​ ☆ @missevrythingg​ ☆ @screamholland​ ☆ @softholand​​ ☆ @hotforharrison​ ☆ @osterfield-holland-andcompany​ 

[xmoonlitxdreamx]

Galar Star Fanbook Notes (cover, p. 2)

I randomly remembered I bought this SWSH magazine special back when I was living in Japan in 2021... it looks like this:

I skimmed it when I got it (mainly for this section called "Raihan's 15 Secrets"), but I thought I'd give a go at trying to read it more thoroughly. :V It has things like character blurbs, fan opinions, and popularity poll results. I'm hoping to share my rough translations over a series of different posts since it's pretty long and I'm really slow at reading;;

DISCLAIMER: I'm not a professional translator and my Japanese is honestly not that good (I'm like N3-ish I guess, never took the JLPT tbh). I only lived in Japan for around 2 years before moving back to the US. I'm definitely going to be missing a lot of nuance in my translations & there's a good chance I may translate some things incorrectly. I'll do my best tho. ^^;

Anyway, this is only the first 2 pages, but feel free to continue under the cut for the translation/summary if you're interested!

Cover page

Galar Star Fanbook

Features a reader-decided popularity poll for Galar trainers!

Fanbook contents:

Questionnaire summary and results (p.2)

Raihan's 15 secrets (p.5)

Major character compilation/ranking (p.6)

Trainer class compilation/ranking (p. 10)

Pokemon TCG Sword and Shield trainer card publication at a glance

Page 2

Nintendo Dream Reader Poll Results: Most Popular Galar Trainers! (TN: "Nintendo Dream" is the magazine this fanbook was featured in)

Poll Rules & Overview:

In December 2020, the official Nintendo Dream twitter page (@/nindori) began accepting votes for a poll to determine the most popular characters in Pokemon: Sword and Shield. The poll was conducted using Google Forms, with one submission per voter. The poll was divided into two sections: major characters and trainer classes. Voters included their top 3 favorite major characters and their top 2 favorite trainer classes in their submission.

28 Total Characters for the Major Character Popularity Poll

The "Major Character" results come from the various characters you meet in Galar, such as gym leaders and rivals to the protagonist. The "approval rating" score next to each character represents what percent of voters included that character in their submission.

(TN: idk it's kind of a confusing metric since the results are based on voters submitting their top 3 favs instead of just submitting one character vote per person... if someone can explain the statistics behind this better than me, that'd be great LMAO;;)

From 6th place and onward, the approval rating scores were considerably close!

1st Place: Raihan (approval rating: 48%)

He's Galar's top gym leader and Leon's strongest rival. He's never not smiling and his normal demeanor is one that's somewhat relaxed and unserious. He also shows a complete change of expression in battle, where he has a more fierce demeanor. This personality gap leaves quite an impression. He's in first place and earned a noticeably high approval rating score!

(TN: I'm pretty sure the approval rating means 48% of voters included Raihan in their top 3 when they voted. So almost half of the participants included him in their vote.)

2nd Place: Leon (approval rating: 40.1%)

For the main character, Raihan, Hop, and many other people in Galar, Leon is seen as the main goal to surpass. He's been the strongest champion for a considerable amount of time, and his strength in battle, of course, lives up to his champion title. His dedication to accomplishing his duties as well as his straightforward nature certainly make him admirable.

3rd Place: Hop (approval rating: 33.1%)

Hop is the rival who knows the protagonist the best. He's also a close friend of the protagonist's, and the two of them go on an array of adventures together. Even though he becomes worried about the difference in strength between himself and his surrounding competitors, his growth makes him quite sympathetic.

4th Place: Piers (approval rating: 27.5%)

His tone of voice is simultaneously polite and blunt. His outward appearance truly gives off "dark type" vibes, yet he's good at taking care of others... he shows many sides of himself--in particular, his brotherly nature leaves a strong impression.

(TN: I think the first part about Piers being polite is referring to the fact that Piers uses polite forms (です/ます) in the Japanese version of the game, iirc. It's kinda weird/dissonant to be rude and blunt when using polite forms, which is probably the point. I guess imagine like... a rude, blunt person trying to use customer service voice, idk (??))

5th Place: Kabu (approval rating: 17.2%)

On the one hand, he leads the youthful trainers as their elder. At the same time, he never forgets to respect those younger than him and always seeks to challenge himself. He's a hot-blooded gym leader with a spirit full of vigor. His surprisingly playful side is also what makes him popular.

---

OK that's all of the cover and page 2! The next page has the 6th place ~ 10th place characters + some additional demographic information. I'll try to translate that one next sometime. Thanks for reading!

(9/17/2022: changed "regular trainer" to "trainer class")

page 3: [x]

[like-that-one-weird-dog-thing]

ok ok i havent been like. Active in this fandom for a while but i jus

red shoe theory!!!

okok listen alr i do Not believe this as an actual canonical thing, and i can totally see why a lot of people are frustrated with it, but i just??? love it a lot??

so im gonna jus. talk about it lmao

so for anyone not aware of the red shoe theory, its just the theory that the reason izuku wears his red shoes(and why we see baby am with them) is because quirkless people need special shoes to. yk. Walk Comfortably. now personally again i dont this is canon but i like it a lot!! as someone with wider feet than the average person, i’d like to say Shoes Are A Fucking Nightmare

here’s the thing, my entire family has this issue, and for all of us, shoes hurt. i live for the day i can finally actually afford Good Fucking Shoes that Fit ok. it does not matter how many sizes i go up, it has also hurt to wear shoes. and i know that Yeah maybe losing that pinky toe joint would change much, but i feel like itd change enough, yk?

see, my feet are most wide at my toes- and as a kid this was wonderful! it actually gave me a lot better balance than most other kids, and was great for climbing places i wasnt meant to be able to climb.

now? owowowow pain i hate my feet

i cannot easily find shoes that fit me comfortably, and in the end my shoes will always begin to break open at the sides of my toes.

my feet arent extreme, its not super noticeable, but its enough. and its why i like the red shoe theory- because honestly if i could afford it id scrounge up all my fucking money to get shoes made for my type of feet. and the idea that quirkless people having that toe joint make their feet that might wider, requiring them to have specific shoes, is something i can rlly rlly relate to

and i know another issue people have with the shoe theory is that ‘why is it only those shoes??? wtf’ but i’d also like to say that, despite the 20% statistic we’re given, i feel like its more than a bit misleading? im a firm believer that quirkless people are either a smaller percentage of that, or that the percentages shrink drastically depending on where you are. specifically, i wouldnt be surprised if japan had an incredibly low quirkless population

and the thing is, yeah maybe a lot of companies might cater to my feet, but practically none are affordable for me where im at, and i feel like that could be the reason for the shoes- in japan, maybe with the dwindling quirkless population all the wider shoe companies just. stopped yk? because it stopped being profitable. so at a point, it became incredibly hard to get those shoes, and eventually they had to be imported to you to get them in japan. and yeah, thered absolutely be other designs for the shoes, but consider: the red shoes are the cheapest. its simple, yk? with how quirkless people are shown to be treated, they seem unlikely to be able to get a rlly high paying job, and when you dont make enough money you just go with the cheapest option, yk?

but still, obv some quirkless people Wouldnt Do That, whether to avoid the off chance of someone recognizing their shoes or they just cant afford it, people would absolutely go a size up or smth! hell, thats what im doing! but still, that kills you feet, which in turn hurts your knees, then your hips, and finally your back. it fucking hurts man

so idk i find the concept rlly interesting personally

[kae-karo]

OOOOOOOH W FOR THE FIC ASK!!

ahhhh hi hello red!!! tyty!!

send me fic writing asks from this list!

W: What is your favorite pairing to write?  Favorite pairing to read?

i think my favorite pairing to write just deadass varies based on what idea i'm obsessed with at the moment? based solely on statistics, kaeluc is my most written pairing, although i will say that i really enjoy the more enemies-to-lovers dynamics when it comes to writing? so i actually really like writing chiluc lmao when i have a good idea for them at least. i think ultimately the more i enjoy writing a specific character, the more i enjoy writing a pairing with them in it? so most any kaeya or childe ships i have a great time writing lmao

as for reading, i can usually be persuaded to enjoy any pairing tbh? i am so so picky when it comes to reading fic which is like. not great lmao so i tend to rely on recs for fics but every now and then i'll give a random fic a chance if the premise interests me? but tbh that usually still falls within the 'i really like at least one of the characters' lmao so i'm most likely to pick up a fic if it's got kaeya or childe in it lmao

send me fic writing asks from this list!

[clustxr]

actually. dream is a fuckin sore loser when it comes to competitions LMAO i would hate to win against him in mcc only for him to whine about how it’s unfair and “disproportionate […] statistically”

this got longer than expected so tl,dr: dream should suck it up and admit that he just isn’t very good at buildmart instead of bitching about it every time it gets played just because he isn’t guaranteed a spot on the leaderboard

this is about buildmart btw. like he’s all ”oh i can‘t focus it’s too hard to remember all of the stuff“ MEMORY IS JUST AS MUCH A SKILL AS PVP… and you have chat + teammates to help you out??? just bc pete (and specifically *pete only* and in just that one event) doesn’t always use those resources doesn’t mean that using them makes you automatically suck. fuckin complain about “but PETE doesn’t use them so i shouldnt need to!!“ sometimes people are better than you idk what to say. and sometimes you don’t always need to compare yourself to other people and use the most individually focused strategies possible in every game.

the REASON why dream thinks that buildmart sucks as a team communication game is because he doesn’t see it as one. he treats it like an individual game, so he gets its experience as an individual game, and then complains when it’s not working as an individual game. when it is very much a team communication game unless you are incredibly aware of the builds & needs of others without needing that verbal communication and have a good memory & rapid response time. when people like grian play buildmart, a large part of their success is reliant on teammates discussing needs, communicating priorities, and checking in with each other frequently in order to get builds done. this is highly effective, as seen in grian‘s teams’ consistent good placements in buildmart. however when you look at dream‘s efforts, he’s more focused on doing his own thing. i think if he instead learned how to direct his team in buildmart like he does in pvp oriented games (and take a leaf out of grian’s book strategy-wise) he could make a great leader and get a better score.

of course, buildmart doesn’t force teamwork like grid runners does, which is probably a source of frustration for dream (& others, no doubt) but honestly? yeah maybe it’s not strictly necessary but it certainly *helps* if you’re not fuckin insane at the game.

part of his rant which sort of confused me is the “i’m not bad at buildmart but i don’t like it, except i’ve never placed above grian and even with my best efforts i still haven’t won“ like no offense but maybe you ARE bad at it lol just admit that non-forced teamwork isn’t your strongest suit and go. there’s no shame in admitting that you just aren’t good at something! but insisting that you are, when you’re clearly *not*, is not going to help.

“there are ways for people who are worse to do good, but there’s not in buildmart”… the same could be said about other team based games like sot and grid runners imo. if you’re a good team there’s a chance that you might fuck it up with a game like buildmart but if you don’t have that teamwork then you won’t do well. that‘s the whole point of the game. and let’s be real here even with the occasional pop-off of a ”worse” team in another game it’s pretty much guaranteed to be the same outcome either way. and again buildmart is supposed to be something that challenges a pvp-oriented team (i.e. a standard dream mcc team) and forces them out of their comfort zone and puts them i an environment where the “worse” teams will almost certainly do better than them, or at least have a chance. in other words, buildmart is the pop-off *game* rather than a pop-off *moment*. it could actually make an impact on the leaderboard compared to the moments that a team would have in another game.

even way back in aug 2020 he had a tendency to whine about minor inconveniences. remember when 1.16 dropped and he tried to petition mojang to revert changes to fortress generation instead of a) continuing to speedrun in older versions, b) trying out 1.16 and getting used to the high amounts of resets/etc, c) figuring out new speedrunning strats or digging deeper into world generation to find a workaround to this problem, or d) waiting for someone else to do all of the work until new speedrunning strats were figured out that would revolutionize 1.16+ speedrunning and make a sub10 rsg igt wr possible? yeah. (i guarantee that if this happened nowadays, dream stans would be bitching about it too and dream antis would fucking hate it lmao.) at this point the tantrums just come with the guy i guess lol hell if i know what to do about it at the end of the day

[ready-to-obeyme]

[OM!] (American) College!AU Demon Brothers

Scenario: Headcanons on the demon brothers as college students (specifically in the US because I don’t know how college works elsewhere), their possible majors, career goals, extracurriculars, ~GPA~ and whatever else I could think of + how meet you in college

Note: I’m hoping to do a Part 2 with the Undateables but honestly… we’ll see lol. This is based off something ~A~ and I thought of for our specific university but we’ve made it broad enough to share HAHA this turned out VERY long

- 

Lucifer

Majoring in Political Sciences with a minor in Psychology

Pre-Law-- most likely immigration law or child custody (there’s definitely a backstory here)

Initially went to community college for the first two years to save up money to take care of his younger siblings

Rejected an offer to go to an Ivy League because it was too expensive; if his siblings ever found out they’d be furious that he’d give up on that chance, but he knows he can succeed wherever he goes (and besides, family is first) 

Transferred into a 4-year university his junior year 

Very high GPA-- VERY

In a professional fraternity with Diavolo and Barbatos 

He didn’t think he’d join one either but Diavolo was the vice chair when he transferred in and the president the year after so… ~nepotism?~ and also Lucifer is charming as heck so no surprise he’d get in

Also rooms with Diavolo and Barbatos

Goes to the gym regularly just to keep fit; gets goaded by Diavolo and Satan into joining an IM team with his frat brothers and actual brothers-- probably basketball or flag football

Probably meets you at a interclub council meeting and mutters under his breath how useless the board members are and you overhear 

“Never have I met more incompetent people.”

“Lmao mood”

“!!!”

Keeps sitting next to you at every interclub meeting then after because at least there’s someone that can keep his mind stimulated (thinks you’re hot if you’re competent btw)

If you somehow meet him on campus, he’s the type of guy to put his hand up and pretend he didn’t see you (just kidding, he always ends up saying hi anyways) 

Will Absolutely Lecture You if you are procrastinating on studying especially if your midterm is, like, TOMORROW

Always ends up studying with him because he’s actually focused on studying and glares at you if you get distracted (but hey you get good scores in the end)

Mammon

Majoring in Business Econ/Economics, Minoring in Statistics

(always ends up in the middle of the “is econ a humanities or a STEM major” debate that leaves him left for dead) 

Planning to work in Business as Finance -- probably has been treasurer or finance director for a club; can even see him being a banker if it suits his plans better

Goes to a four-year university

Decent GPA (or Lucifer would absolutely destroy him), and does REALLY well in mathematics classes

Would room with Lucifer and his posse if they all go to the same school 

Probably in a Business Frat as well because he’s pretty charismatic when it comes down to it but  was an RA for some of his years for the free rooming and dining hall privileges 

Is a very chill and understanding RA (as in he smokes weed with you when he’s off-duty) but is surprisingly well-versed in dealing with roommate issues

Works part-time (gasp) to buy stuff off of Amazon and go out to places 

Spends a lot of time exploring places with his friends, going hiking, rock-climbing, clubbing-- which is expensive, as it turns out, so he needed to be able to afford it somehow

Meets you when you’re eating your lunch outside somewhere and he asks you if you have a dollar he could borrow for a vending machine snack

You exchange numbers with him so he can pay it back (even though you honestly don’t really need it, but why not) and turns out he’s in your GE class

“Heyyy wassup! So glad I have a friend in this class” 

“Oh by the way, did you finish the homework? Haha, I forgot it.” 

Mammon always repays you for your help in food though so you aren’t complaining

Leviathan

Majoring in Computer Sciences

And honestly that’s too much for me already-- the man is doing computer programming, coding-- WHEW-- and they do NOT rest

Goes to a community college but honestly has no problems cinching internships. The computer is his domain-- online applications are EASY, doing projects NOT as easy, interviews? HARD-- REALLY HARD (someone help him)

Probably intends to work with a big company like Google if only to help supply his income so he can live his life going to AX and buying merch 

Most likely moved out of his house mid-college with his online friends (who are luckily compatible with him living-space wise) and visits home once a week 

There’s two potential sides you can meet first: 

Either you meet him at a convention and you both gush about the same character and anime and somehow find each other online (not college related) 

Or his favorite Ruri-chan keychain gets broken off in the computer lab, and you’re the one running after him to give it him

He may or may not owe you his life after that (and if you enjoy anime, well that’s a bonus)

Both of these meetings can happen if he doesn’t recognize you in class because you were in cosplay-- imagine the surprise

The two of you as friends are MASTER PROCRASTINATORS at every assignment the two of you have-- so low-key not a great influence-- but you have fun together watching animes, playing games, talking about life-- anything but actual work 

Always ends up scrambling to finish things-- but he keeps doing it because it’s been working for him so far

You help him prepare for interviews because he’s always nervous before each one regardless of how well his application looks

Satan

Majoring in Comparative Literature AND Anthropology (ya boy is doing the whole nine yards)

Planning to get his Master’s and then a PhD in one of his majors (whichever proves to be more engaging for him)-- visibly excited to become a Professor

College was meant for Satan-- like REALLY; the man is in LOVE with learning; most likely to go and be accepted to an Ivy-League after Lucifer but... truly believes you can get a good education anywhere so it depends on his financial standing (and how much scholarship he gets)

Does get a little disgruntled when his classes aren’t available but doesn’t mind learning something new-- if the professor bores him to death, he’ll read the book

Really good at tutoring people; someone suggests that he works as a peer-learning facilitator/writing tutor and he does-- might as well make bank doing something you always do anyways   

Joins a writing/journal club as an extracurricular and a club that provides tutoring services to the underserved community-- surprisingly good with kids!

He knows friends in high places, so if he wanted to, could get into any party without batting an eye and his favorite professors love him

Spends a lot of his time going out to the city and exploring places, similarly to Mammon, rock-climbing, hiking, paragliding-- anything

He is VERY well-rounded as you can see; competes with Lucifer to see whose GPA is better though

You probably meet him during office hours, and you can only stare in awe as he asks questions that you had in mind, but better; if you’re visibly confused about something, he’ll take his time to help you too (it’s habit at this point)

Ask him for his contact info and you’ll get it, and maybe repay him in coffee? (You always see him at the cafe on campus.) 

Most likely to have a specific spot in a cafe that he is always at that the workers actually save a spot for him or give him his usual order before he even arrives-- may or may not have helped them edit their essays or with their homework as a thank-you so you KNOW they’ll love him forever

The type of person to help you make flashcards and cram if you need it

Asmodeus

Majoring in Dance and Fine Arts (I HC going to NYU specifically)

Considering going for an Master of Fine Arts degree but he might just move to New York and go for being a Broadway Star

College is mainly just training for him and hoping to land gigs in local theater-- and the university theater if there is one-- and building his resume for his big break 

Has SO many extracurriculars, all pertaining to his career choice, but also because he enjoys what he does: drama, competitive dance team, acapella, fashion design

Makes an unbelievable amount of friends, incredibly good at networking

The first time you saw him was when he was performing for a local theater and you were in love with his performance, and the next time you saw him in the hallway of a classroom building, you told him how much you enjoyed it

Always accepts compliments about his looks with grace, but there’s something about truly being admired for his acting and singing that has him preening

Invites you to come out to his next performance, and if not his, then to another play-- and it can be a date, but up to you ;) 

The man is the KING of Multiple Talents and has big dreams to match 

Always finds a way to hang out with you and drag you to every club that he can use his fake-id for (and when he’s actually 21 and above, gets a little offended that he doesn’t get ID’d) 

A night in the town with you is always a good night! 

Sometimes when he has practical exams coming up, he asks you to watch him perform-- and he likes your compliments but actually takes getting all the moves seriously so you better pay attention!

Most likely to move far away to reach his dreams, but he would take you with him if he could-- his little star

Beelzebub

Majoring in Physiological Sciences

Pre-Nursing or Pre-Sports Medicine 

He’s a little undecided, but he’s definitely going to go into the health field because he likes the idea of being able to use his strength to help others

Gets a scholarship from the university because he’s part of the football team, which is actually pretty hard on him because Fall Semester/Quarter he has to keep skipping classes for games  

Always brings a snack to eat with him during lecture-- and is not afraid to bring his entire lunch and make it right in the front row, though he tends to stick to the back because they tend to have electrical plugs 

You most likely meet him during lecture: he offers you an entire sandwich (not a chip bag, not fruit snacks, an entire LUNCH) because he heard your stomach growl during class 

From then on, you collect notes for him when he’s gone from games and even go to games if you aren’t usually the type to just to see how he’s doing; it’s hard trying to find you among the huge bleachers, but he always asks you where you’re sitting anyways 

Really appreciate it if you help him study into late at night because it IS hard balancing sports and academics 

He most likely doesn’t really have any time for anything else so he usually makes up for it during the rest of the year when training is less to volunteer in the hospital or at the gym as a personal trainer 

If you ask him to teach you how to properly lift weights, he’ll definitely help out and the both of you can work out together-- though you feel bad when he has to add four extra weights to each side after you finish your reps

Belphegor

Majoring in Computer Graphics/Animation

Intending to go into making animation or game design-- is one of the brothers who doesn’t really know exactly what he wants to do yet because he’s afraid that doing what he loves as a job will ruin it for him

His family reassures him that they’ll support him whether or not he continues with his path in life, but he’s considering art school and then taking internships in places so he has a better idea on what he wants

Most likely to sell his own original work and become a full-time artist regardless

I think you already know how you meet him-- he’s sleeping in a lecture hall-- either against the wall or on the small piece of wood they call a desk when class ends and he’s still sleeping; and you wake him up 

Sleepily thanks you and continues to sleep through every class that you wake him up to; when you ask him why he doesn’t just go home and sleep, he tells you he’s too lazy to walk back and forth from his dorm/apartment to campus (mood) 

When you add each other on Snapchat or something, he sends you pics of ‘places to nap’ on campus

You always end up studying together because he’s actually pretty good at understanding lecture stuff despite not being awake for most of it-- apparently he’s used to teaching himself 

Will make you art for your birthday and will vehemently refuse payment so he just tells you to take him out for dinner instead 

If you talk about how you’re not sure on what you want to do in life too, he’ll probably say ‘mood’ but is most likely to encourage you to do whatever you want to do in life too 

[vxlkyrie]

bittersweet - i

pairing: spencer reid x reader, jay halstead x reader, sonny carisi x reader

genre: angst, fluff

warning: cursing, violence, graphic crime details, mentions of rape, mentions of death, mentions of alcohol

word count: 3.7k

summary: a huge case calls for the bau, intelligence, and special victims, causing you to cross paths with your ex – that no one in your team knew about

other parts: two, three

a/n: holy shit it’s crossover time! this is my first series, so i hope you guys enjoy this first part. i also want to point out that the members of each squad don’t line up (we have the current svu and chicago pd squads with the bau team from like season 7) so bare with me lmao

you were sitting at your desk, twisting the ring on your left hand that sparkled under the office lights.

you and the bau were having dinner at rossi’s house celebrating your five-year anniversary dating spencer. everyone was in their own little world, conversing with one another.

“happy anniversary babe,” you smiled at the love of your life, planting a kiss on his lips. “i love you.”

“i love you too.” he smiled back, admiring your features. spencer took his wine glass and stood up.

“spence, what are you doing?” you whispered as he clinked his glass with a fork, turning everyone’s attention towards him.

“i would like to make a toast,” he started. “as you all know, today is a very special day for me and y/n.” he turned to you.

oh god. you thought to yourself as you felt your face heating up.

“i remember the first time we met. you walked - well, stumbled, into the bullpen, and almost dropped the box you were carrying.” spencer said, causing the others to laugh. “i turned around and ran over to help you. as you thanked me, our eyes met. and in that moment, i knew that i was going to be a sucker for you.” he continued, making you smile wide. “after a couple of months of pining over you, you made the first move of asking me out – you weren’t one for tradition anyways. and ever since then, you have continued to make me into the man that i am today.”

you could feel tears building up.

“i was the most awkward guy in the office that annoyed everyone with statistics, but you never interrupted me. you listened to the many thoughts and facts that run through my mind every second of every day. you’ve helped me come out of my shell, taught me how to love, and i will forever be grateful to you. to five years.” he finished, taking a sip of wine before setting down the glass.

“to five years.” you and the rest of the room said, raising their glasses.

“and to five more years. and many more.” spencer said, getting down on one knee and revealing a small velvet box that contained a simple, yet beautiful ring. “y/n l/n, will you marry me?”

you slapped a hand over your mouth as tears started falling. everyone screamed in shock, with derek cheering at how bold his best friend had become.

“yes! oh my god spence, yes!” you nodded furiously, wiping the tears off your face as you let your other half slip the ring on your finger. spencer held your face as he pulled you in for a passionate kiss, cheers echoing throughout the dining room.

you were smiling to yourself, before a familiar voice catches your attention.

“y/n?” you turned to see spencer giving you a small smile. he bent down to give you a kiss on the forehead.

“hey, what’s up?”

“hotch just said we got a case.” he chuckled, knowing that you weren’t paying attention to anything but the little ring that adorned your finger.

“oh right,” you said softly, feeling like you were a kid who was caught stealing cookies from the tin. “let’s go.” you grabbed spencer’s hand and walked towards the conference room, sitting down with the rest of the team.

“glad you two could join us.” hotch teased, earning giggles from emily and derek.

“now that the lovebirds are here, let’s get started,” penelope said. “we got a call directly from captain olivia benson from special victims in new york.”

“y/n’s old boss?” spencer asked, earning a nod from you and penelope.

“anyways, there has been nine victims from new york, chicago, and richmond. most recent one was a few days ago. all women were raped and murdered.” she continued.

“none of the victims look alike, do you know if any of them are connected in any way?” jj asked. 

“not as of right now, but i’m still digging.” penelope shook her head.

“if there’s no victimology, why do they need us?” derek asked.

“maybe they were victims of opportunity.” you chirped in.

“could be. but we also need to help build a profile of the unsub. maybe predict what he’s gonna do next.” rossi added.

“and we know he’s not gonna stop anytime soon. wheels up in 30.” hotch announced, cueing the rest of the team to grab their go-bags.

-

you felt anxious as you and the bau head up to the special victims office. it’s been years since you’ve seen anyone from your old squad.

“hey liv, you wanted to see me?” you said as you stepped into your boss’s office, taking the seat in front of her desk.

“yes. you’re going to be transferring to the behavioral analysis unit in quantico.” olivia stated. your eyes widened.

“fbi? there must’ve been a mistake.” you furrowed your eyebrows in confusion.

“oh there is indeed no mistake. i put in a recommendation for you myself, and they had just approved it. i think you’ll make a wonderful addition to the team.”

“but,” you paused. “i love it here. i don’t see myself in any other unit other than this.” you explained as you tried to keep tears from falling.

“y/n. i know that you love it here. you are great at your job. but i see the potential that you have. you were meant for so much more. working for the fbi is an amazing opportunity for you to grow. you’ve already proved to me that you are a great detective. now prove to the rest of the world that you’ll make an even greater agent.” olivia said, ignoring that tears that ran down both of your faces.

“y/n!” a female voice called out as soon as you walked through the opened door. your eyes locked with olivia’s as you practically run into her arms, giving her a tight hug. “how’s my baby been?”

“i’ve been great.” you said as you pulled away from her. you see amanda and fin walk up to you, greeting them with hugs, as well as briefly introducing yourself to kat.

“it’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” you smiled at her.

“you too, i’ve heard you left quite a legacy in special victims.” she complimented you.

“thank you. where’s sonny?” you asked, looking around to see if he was around.

“he’s on his way from the a.d.a.’s office.” amanda smirked.

“what? no way!” your jaw dropped. you smiled, feeling proud that your former partner’s late nights at fordham paid off.

“hey, whatchu doing?” you asked sonny as he opened a big textbook on his coffee table.

you decided to crash as your best friend’s apartment after a long case.

“studying. i’m taking the bar exam pretty soon.” he answered as you took the seat next to him on the couch, leaning your head on his shoulder.

“it’s already late,” you whined. “and besides, you have plenty of time until the exam. we’ve had a long day, don’t stress yourself even more.”

“i would like to sleep too, but this exam is really important to me. i’m sleeping on the couch anyways.”

“no you’re not. this is your place, you should be sleeping in your own bed. i’ll sleep here.” you pouted.

“not a chance y/n. go to sleep already.” sonny said.

“not until you go to sleep.” you squinted at him as you stayed on the couch. sonny chuckled at you, returning to his textbook.

you played with your phone on the couch for what seemed like forever. you felt your eyes slowly take over as you slipped into unconsciousness.

sonny turned to your sleeping figure with your phone laying next to your head.

“dork.” he chuckled, picking you up bridal style and laying you on his bed, placing the comforter over your body.

“sleep well, doll.”

“no way. is that y/n l/n?!” a loud voice echoed through the squad room.

speak of the devil.

you turned around to see sonny standing tall and proud with open arms. you walked towards him, wrapping your arms around his torso.

“i’ve missed you so much, doll.” he laughed. “how’s everything?”

the rest of the team laughed as they watched your little reunion with your old friends. spencer couldn’t help but smile, remembering the times you told him about your days as a special victims detective in new york.

“this is my boss, olivia benson. the sweetest woman ever – she’s basically my second mom. her son, noah, he’s the absolute cutest. she told me he started taking ballet lessons,” you said as you pointed at a picture of you and the squad eating dinner. “this is fin tutuola. he’s like my second dad. he helped me when i first started in special victims. helped me with being more tough.” you continued, flexing your arms.

“well, you are pretty tough.” spencer chuckled as he hugged his pillow closer to him.

“right here, that’s amanda rollins. she’s a total badass. she’s like jj and emily combined,” you said, earning a surprised look from your boyfriend. “she has two girls – jesse, total sweetheart, and billie, who she had recently given birth to. and this guy,” you pointed towards a taller man. “is dominick carisi jr., but we call him sonny. amazing detective. even passed his bar exam. he was my partner before i left. he was there for me when i felt like giving up, but he never gave up on me.” you smiled sadly.

“he sounds like a great man.” spencer said, running his fingers through your hair.

“he is,” you nodded. you looked up at spencer. “you okay baby?” you asked, noticing his demeanor had slightly changed.

“yeah, everything’s alright.” he gulped.

“you know i love you and only you, right?” you said, lacing your hand with his. spencer nodded. “you have nothing to worry about. sonny is my best friend. he sees me as a little sister. nothing to worry about.”

“i know.” he smiled at you. you weren’t convinced.

“hey,” you gently placed your hands on each side of his face. “seriously, you have nothing to worry about.” you practically whispered.

“and i believe you,” spencer said, placing his hands over yours. “i’m sorry if i get jealous when the love of my life talks about another man.” he confessed.

“don’t be sorry,” you sighed. “i’d be jealous too.”

“can i ask you something?” spencer asked as you took his hands into yours. you nodded at him. “did you, uh, ever had feelings for him?”

you inhaled deeply. you knew you had to be honest with him. you love him enough to trust that he wouldn’t be hurt by what you’re about to confess to him.

“for sonny? to be honest, yeah, when we first became partners,” you started, your grip on his hands getting a bit tighter. “we were just so close to each other and he protected me, and i couldn’t help but fall for him.”

“what changed?”

“i guess he only saw me as family. he told me about his little crush on amanda, and i knew that he would never see me like that. i got over it quickly, especially because i never told him how i felt. i knew that i can’t let my feelings affect my work.” you sniffed.

“thank you for telling me this y/n.” spencer said.

“well, you asked. and i trusted that you wouldn’t get mad.”

“thank you for trusting me.” he smiled, pecking your lips before you both fell asleep.

“it’s great to meet you captain benson.” hotch said, shaking hands with your former boss.

“it’s great to have you all here.” she grinned.

“this is ssa emily prentiss, derek morgan, david rossi, jennifer jareau, technical analyst penelope garcia,” hotch said, pointing everyone out as he introduced them to the special victims team. they all shook each other’s hand (with spencer waving his hand from the back of the group). “and this is doctor spencer reid.” he finished. the rest of special victims turned their heads towards the tall man that stood out from the rest of the bau.

your phone rang, notifying you that you were getting a facetime call from your old partner. you pressed the accept button, seeing the screen fill up with sonny as well as the rest of your old team.

they must be having dinner together.

“hey everyone!” you beamed at them.

“hi y/n!” sonny said first, followed by the rest. 

“it’s been so long since you’ve called.” olivia said.

“i know! i’m sorry! i’ve been flying everywhere for the past few weeks.” you apologized.

“don’t worry doll, we’ve all been busy trying to save the world.” he teased.

“so, how’s that boyfriend of yours?” fin chimed in from the background.

“yeah, what’s his name? sean?” amanda asked.

“spencer.” you laughed as you corrected her. “and he’s great! he actually fell asleep earlier.”

“damn, and just when i thought we were gonna see his face today.” amanda sighed.

“well, i think you guys are gonna meet him real soon.” you smiled.

“i know that look on your face. what do you mean by real soon?” sonny squinted at you. you smiled even wider as you held your left hand towards the camera, ring on full display, laughing as screams came from your phone.

“congratulations!”

“so this is spencer?” olivia quirked an eyebrow at you and smirked, making you and spencer blush. everyone else giggled. “come on, i’ll get you guys a room so you can set up. hotch, y/n, can we talk in my office real quick?”

the detectives led the agents into a big conference room. you glanced at spencer, giving him a look to tell you that it’s probably nothing and he shouldn’t worry about it. derek and penelope looked at you like you just got called into the principal’s office. you rolled your eyes as you stepped into olivia’s office.

“what’s up liv?” you asked as olivia closed the door.

“well, i’m sure you know that the murders took place here, virginia, and illinois.”

“that’s correct.” hotch affirmed.

“i wanted to let you guys know that i’m having chicago pd come in as well to show us what they’ve been gathering.” she said, looking at you.

“it’s a full house today.” you quipped. olivia took in a deep breath.

“specifically their intelligence unit.” she finished. your eyes immediately widened as your shoulders tensed up. your actions don’t go unnoticed by your current boss.

“are you okay y/n?” he asked, earning a nod from you. “is there something about intelligence that i should know?” he raised an eyebrow.

did someone turn up the temperature?

“i, uh, i used to date someone from intelligence.” you confessed.

“and you didn’t bother to inform me?” hotch sighed. “who?” he asked curiously, raising his other eyebrow.

“hey babe.” a male voice greeted through your phone as you held it up by your ear.

“hey jay.” you answered back as you laid in your bed.

“when’s the next time you’ll be in chicago? i heard this new japanese restaurant just opened up. we should definitely check it out when you fly over here.” he said excitedly. you smiled bitterly to yourself.

“as good as that sounds, i don’t think i’ll have time to be visiting chicago.”

“well, yeah. i mean we’re both busy, but i’m sure olivia would let you have some time off.” jay chuckled.

“i don’t think she will.”

“what do you mean?”

just spit it out already damn it.

“i-i, uh, i’m transferring units. i’ll be working behavioral analysis – in quantico.” you said, basically ripping the band-aid off.

“you’re gonna be an fbi agent? babe, that’s great! congratulations!”

“thank you. but it means i’m gonna be even more busy with work. i’ll be called in more, flying everywhere. i don’t even know if i can get a day off.” you explained.

“we can still work something out. and besides, you can come visit me when you have cases in chicago.”

“and what happens when the second i see you, i have another case in another state and have to leave?” you said, getting a little annoyed.

“y/n, it’s okay. i’ll understand.”

“jay, i don’t want you to keep waiting for me. you deserve to be with someone who will be there for you.” you felt tears building up.

“you’re there for me, even if it’s just by phone.”

“you need someone who will be there for you, physically.”

“that doesn’t matter to me, i just want you!” he exclaimed. you gulped, trying not to choke on your tears.

“you say that now. and then later you’ll be pissed that i had to cancel another flight because of another case coming in. you’ll be hurt, and i don’t want you to go through any of that. please, this is the best for the both of us.” your heart raced as jay stayed silent. “jay, please say something.”

“so, we’re just gonna break up like that?”

“jay,” you sighed. “you know i love you, and i always will, but you deserve someone who will make you happy, both emotionally and physically. and i hate that i can’t be that someone. we can’t do this anymore. don’t fight me on this one.”

“well, you can be stubborn sometimes.” jay laughed bitterly.

i can’t believe he’s trying to make me laugh while i’m covered in tears and breaking both of our hearts.

“i guess this is it then, y/n.”

“i’m sorry.” you simply said.

“yeah, me too. i won’t forget about you, you know that?”

“yeah, i know.” you softly exhaled through your nose.

“if you need anything, and i mean anything, i’m one phone call away.”

“thanks jay.” you sniffed, wiping your face clean of any remaining stray tears.

“have a good night.”

“you too.” you said, letting him hang up.

“jay. jay halstead. we broke up after my transfer got approved. but it’s not like we’re on bad terms or anything.”

you two weren’t on any terms at all. you haven’t spoken to him since the breakup. it’s as if you never knew him.

whenever the team had cases in chicago, you never mentioned to anyone about your history in that city.

“does spencer know?”

“n-no,” you said quietly, earning a look from hotch. “he never asked. look, what i had with jay was years ago, and you know i love spencer – no matter what. my past relationship will not affect our work, sir.” you explained. hotch nodded at you.

“i’ll see you in the conference room.” he said, leaving the room. you turned to olivia.

“it’s good to see you again, in person.” she said, giving you a small smile.

“you too.” you said as you got up.

“so you really love him, don’t you?” olivia suddenly asked. a smile instantly painted your face as you touched your ring.

“i do.”

-

you and hotch walked into the conference where your team was setting up, files laid out on the table as well as pictures and maps being hung on several white boards.

“you didn’t tell us you were dating an actual genius.” amanda smirked as she, kat, and carisi stood near the door, watching spencer mark the maps.

“i didn’t know shaking hands was dangerously unhygienic. should’ve introduced myself to reid with a kiss.” carisi joked, making you chuckle. you could hear derek, emily, and jj giggling at their comments.

“i like this one.” rossi said, pointing to the other italian man in the room.

“so what did benson talk to you guys about?” derek asked out loudly.

“the intelligence unit from chicago will be joining us on this case.” hotch announced, causing your old team to snap their heads at you. you remained quiet as you pressed your lips together, walking towards your fiance.

“you okay? you seemed very flushed.” spencer said as he rested a hand on your cheek.

“yeah. what do we have so far?” you changed the subject, looking at the different boards that seem to have been separated by state.

“three victims from each state.” emily said, sighing as she hung up photos from the crime scene.

“at first, we thought there were no connections between the victims, but garcia found out that one woman from each state was an alumnae of the same sororities.” spencer said as he added pictures the victims in each of their greek letters.

“these three,” you started, looking at one victim from chicago, one from new york, and one from virginia. “were in kappa alpha delta. these three,” you looked at the next set of victims. “were in sigma phi kappa. and these three were in delta xi.” you said, turning around to see derek with a surprised expression. “i was in a sorority.” you clarified.

“in all the years i’ve known you, i didn’t know you were a sorority girl.” he smirked.

“you should see her apartment. she has letters everywhere.” spencer laughed.

“anyways,” you shook your head. “are we looking at an unsub who was probably rejected by someone in each of these chapters?”

“a man whose sexual advances were rejected?” amanda asked.

“probably. it could also be a woman who wanted to join a sorority and was rejected by all of these houses.” you said.

“those three chapters have been said to be top houses.” penelope added.

“house rankings are bullshit.” you muttered to yourself. but apparently your fiance heard you, quietly chuckling over your comment.

“that doesn’t explain the rapes.” carisi quirked an eyebrow.

“what did the autopsy report say?” jj asked.

“cause of death was a clean slit to the throat. each woman was sodomized before they were killed – wait a minute.” kat said as she read off the file.

“what is it?” emily asked.

“blood report found traces of rohypnol and brodifacoum.”

“brodifacoum?” derek asked.

“rat poison.” you answered. “we’re looking for a female unsub.”

“why female?” carisi asked.

“poison is usually associated with female killers,” spencer answered. “also, the m.e. wrote down that each woman was sodomized with what could possibly be a blunt object.” he explained, carisi nodding at him.

“damn, they’re good.” fin said.

a knock caused everyone to turn their heads towards the door that quickly opened, revealing olivia.

“hey liv, what’s going on?” fin asked.

“intelligence just arrived.” she said. you gulped the lump that suddenly appeared in your throat.

shit.

[alicedrawslesmis]

@feuillygood replied: I picked JVJ for the first one and didnt get the bishops expenses so maybe its fixed now? :) great quiz!

lmao ok I decided to explain what happened

this is kinda hard to explain in a brief way, but when you make a uquiz with 11 questions and 10 possible results it's very unlikely that someone will choose more than 2 or 3 answers that lead to the same result, right? like, the result you get is going to be almost more by chance than any pattern I create (specially since this is a joke quiz and the answers don't seem to have any rhyme or reason) (although I did take this 100% seriously when creating the quiz and there IS an actual pattern that only I know and would be very hard to explain)

and the fact that Jean Valjean is the most common answer in general for who the protagonist of les mis is, and the fact that it's the first question and people haven't all realised it's a joke quiz yet, means answers will skew to whatever result I linked to that answer. Like, I think if I'm not mistaken (I'm terrible at statistics and uQuiz doesn't give me an overview breakdown for each question) this means people will have an almost 1/10 higher chance of getting the bishop's expenses than any other answer (which is a lot)

there must be another question that's skewing the results to that because 1 every 5 people who took the quiz got that result. also why is no one getting 'every time Javert is a furry'? probably because that one question about supporting characters has madame victurnien in it and that's ruining everything