#stop assuming i dislike him because i call him manipulative

[heretherebedork]

The thing for me is, Mew isn't holding a gun to Top's head (yet). And Mew represents just as many people as these other characters, if not more. He has every right to need trust and require proof of trustworthiness on his own terms, just as Top has the power to walk away if he objects. But he agreed. So a lot of the takes and impressions I see about Mew just feel a bit overthought and projected. If he's ever going to consciously be manipulative, it'll be to break bad on Top and Boston after he finds out. He yells at Top in the trailer "Why do I have to find out all this shit on the day I already love you and give you everything?!" - and then smirks(?) as his back is turned while Top hugs him, who looks like all his life choices are flashing before his eyes. So maybe that's meant to be his and Nick's arc, for us to see how the world of love sex and relationships is not idealistic, and how it inevitably changes those within it that are.

That's fine.

Look, I just want to enjoy the idea of a virgin who's also allowed to be manipulative and to use sex and to use his attractiveness and to use his body without having sex. I love the idea. I want it to be true. I want it to happen.

Mew is also absolutely using Ray and his love for him. And that's great!

I want Mew to already know what he's doing and to be looking fire in the eyes with Top and enjoying it nonetheless, to be enjoying because he wants this to go exactly how he wants.

Is it true? Pffft, like I know.

All I know is that I want it and I love that idea.

I don't want Mew to truly be the innocent one who learns through this and only discovers this side of himself because of Top.

I want Mew to know. I want him to know what he values and what that is worth to him and what he wants and to get what he thought he could get and what he was sure he wanted and then to use to keep twisting, to keep twisting Top around his finger tighter and tighter.

Will it happen? Probably not.

But I love that idea of Mew. I love that image of Mew. I love a Mew who can and would use his sexuality without having sex because he wants this. He wants Top like the prize everyone else sees him as and he wants him all to himself but he is still using him the same as everyone else.

Yes, Mew and Nick are likely to be the ones to blow the whole thing open but, in my own way, I want Top and Ray to be the most hurt by the whole thing exploding. I want everyone to be hurt and I want pain but I don't want this to just be Mew's innocence being used against him.

[envy-of-the-apple]

Hey, is it alright if I put in a request for a yandere Connor, nines, and 60? Specifically, them falling over the same human? I'm not sure what the reader would do to get a frankly suspicious amount of connors into them. Maybe they can be.. An artist or something, that supports the revolution? (Also, if you could add some non-con in there, i'd die but like in a good way) thanks!

(Dark, manipulation, non con/rape, vaginal fingering, abuse of power, overstimulation, afab!reader)

(Yandere!Connor, Nines, Sixty x reader)

Biological

AU where Connor, Nines, and Sixty all work at the DPD. Connor gets adopted by hank and is now Officially Connor Anderson AND he's captain of the police force

Up until now, you always thought Officer Nines hated you.

You aren't a cop. And you consider yourself unqualified to hold anything above a water gun. Regardless, your work rehabilitating androids requires you to visit the precinct often: gathering evidence for abuse, and testimonials from victims. Anything you can get your hands on to ensure the client your boss takes on will get the help they need.

It'd make sense that you'd get recognized eventually. Officer Chen greeted you with a simple head nod these days. Detective Sixty was a little more crude, preferring you call you petty nicknames with a sarcastic lilt in his voice.

Captain Anderson ("Conner," he'd insisted on so many times, his LED spinning a pleasant blue, "Just Conner is fine") would be more friendly. The RK800 models may look the same but no one ever mistook one for the other. Captain Anderson was kind, the only one of the models to take on a more human name. Whenever you stayed at the precinct a bit longer than you were comfortable with, he often volunteered to walk you to your car.

But Officer Nines just stared. Eyes tracing your footsteps until you were out of his view and even then you would feel it. He had to dislike you, you always thought, there's no way he couldn't.

At least, that's what you assumed until his lips met yours in the darkness of a closet.

"Pay attention." Detective Sixty's harsh voice broke through your head. He was here too. Between all the chaos, your struggle, you'd stopped to notice two sets of hands had grabbed you into the tiny room, shutting the door as soon as you stumbled through.

"Humans can't see when the light is so low," Officer Nines mused. He had moved to your neck now, tasting your skin. A large hand was covering your mouth, most likely because you screamed too loudly for their taste.

"It's instinct to be scared," the way he spat out the word felt so condescending and spitful. As though he were looking down on you. In a way, it made sense. Who were you compared to metal and wires?

In the end, his argument helped you. The lights flickered on, letting you finally see them. Nines was at your front, his synthetic hair brushed against your jaw. Sixty's hands were gripped along your waist, traveling longer and longer.

You didn't want to think what this was.

"Officers?" your voice was a squeak, barely a sound, "Please what's going-"

Nines' teeth scrapping over your neck makes you snap your mouth shut, curling into yourself. He's the opposite of biology, but his tongue feels so animalistic on your skin, leaving a wet trail. You tremble in their hold. Sixty gives a mean laugh.

"Come on, you can't be that stupid, can you?" He huffs in your ear, nibbling on it, making you jolt, "The big guy here has always wanted a taste. You'll be nice enough to give him one, yes?"

Nines gives a noise of disapproval, pulling back to watch you. You've never seen his gaze so soft before. Hands wipe the tears on your face.

"As if you weren't more desperate," Nines hums, affectionately kissing the corner of your mouth when you start shivering, "You'd still be following around like a lovesick puppy."

Sixty huffs at that, muttering something you can't pick apart.

It's not quite a smile, but Nines' eyes look satisfied when he kisses you again, exploring your mouth with the same softness. It makes sense why. They're not human. You can't hurt them, no matter what they do to you.

Sixty proves it by catching both of your wrists, pinning them behind you as he continues to shuck off your pants, revealing your cotton panties.

Nines pulls away when you start begging again, more delirious, more desperate.

"Don't-don't-" you can barely spit them out, the terror sinking into your tone, "I-I don't-"

He hushes you. It's not quite a frown on his porcelain face, but it's enough to depict how unsatisfied he was with your behavior.

"Don't worry," he says, low, almost like he aims to comfort you, "it's simply biological for humans to enjoy sex."

He says it so flippantly, as though it was a fact. The sky is blue. Fire is hot. They were going to fuck you and you were going to like it.

You flinch when he goes to touch you again, a hand trailing down your neck.

"Looks like this one doesn't like you anymore," Sixty sniggers, palming your ass through your panties, "maybe you should step out. Let us have some alone time."

Nines gives a full frown that time. His disapproval bleeds into his actions.

Nines is a lot less gentle on your clothes. The button-up you were wearing is no match for his strength. You yelp when he rips it open, buttons fly and bounce away. You're pushed further into Sixty's hold, something the Detective readily accepts.

Lithe fingers delve underneath your panties, busying themselves with your pussy. You twitch under his hold. Already your body reacts, despite your disgust, your fear, your dignity.

It's simply biological for humans to enjoy sex.

They were wrong. You didn't enjoy this. You didn't fucking want this. You opened your mouth, fully intent on screaming. Were any of the officers still here? Captain Anderson often kept a late schedule, right?

A hand clamped down on your neck, causing your voice to stagger, stop. Despite your fear, common sense kicks in. Nines would have no problem snapping your neck if you provoked him.

A single look from him is all you need to curl in on yourself. Your will to fight leaves as soon as it arrives. You sink back into his hold.

"See?" Sixty croons in your ear, finding your clit, "Doesn't it feel better when you just give in?"

You sob, it's a pathetic whimper, barely getting out of your throat. Despite your clear struggle, your body gives up immediately. You can feel your pussy grow wet as Sixty continues his assault on your clit.

You gasp when he finds your pussy, one finger pushing into your sopping hole as his thumb rubs circles on your clit. There's a hint of pain, and then Nines kisses you again. It feels like a distraction. It feels like a punishment. Somehow, it ends up being both.

By now, his fingers have left your neck. He grasps your bra, pulling the cups down to squeeze your tits. There's a skillful push of Sixty's fingers, and then you're moaning into Nines' mouth.

"Such a pretty body," Nines sighs when he parts when your lips. He glances down, flicking at your nipple, watching as they harden under his attention. "So reactive as well."

You hiss, arching your back as Sixty delves a second finger, positioning them deep inside you.

"Oh, you're close, aren't you?" Sixty sneers. "I can feel it."

You shake your head, but it'd be nothing but a lie. You can feel yourself slowly tipping over the edge.

When you come, it's nothing but devasting. Smashing you on the ground, shattering you. The only reason you don't collapse is because Sixty hadn't stopped moving inside you, yet.

Your pleas change, begs for him to stop because it hurts now. Sixty pays you no mind. He's more focused on the android in front of you, the one who watched your orgasm with haunting blue eyes.

"Well, big guy?" He asks, pulling his fingers out, "You said you wanted a taste, right?"

He doesn't waste a second, dropping to his knees. Every part of Nines is inhuman, his mouth especially. You keen at the temperature when his tongue dives into your folds. So hot, almost burning.

Nines eats you out like a man starved. He's pulled the panties off of you, the scrap of fabric abandoned on the floor. It's wet, messy, but the overwhelming pleasure of it forces you to toss your head back against Sixty's shoulder, whispering out your pleas through stilted moans. He plays the good cop this time, humming praises and coos into your neck, until you're cumming for the second time.

Nines relents when your thighs are shaking, close to giving out entirely. When he lifts himself up, he's wiping his lips away with the back of his hand. He doesn't break eye-contact with you, not as he starts unbuckling his pants because why would you think they'd stop at just ruining you?

The door swings open, catching all three of you off guard. Nines reacts the quickest, covering your mouth before you can scream. You can only stare into the Captain's brown eyes.

He really does look like Sixty when he's frowning. So far, you've only seen him giving soft smiles.

He's out of his uniform. That should have been your first sign.

"Gentlemen," he says, eyeing both Sixty and Nines before his gaze lands on you. His LED spins yellow. You can't even imagine what he's thinking. That his two best officers could do this.

And yet, the evidence is right in front of him.

"Cap'," Sixty responds.

That should have been your second sign. How casual they were about being found out.

"You're late." Nines says and you suddenly have this horrible thought that you weren't about to be saved.

Captain Anderson lets out a laugh, shaking his head.

"You were always much more impatient than you let on," he chides, brown eyes raking over your heaving body, "some of us had work to do. Why do you think no one heard you despite the recuss you all made?"

Nines lowers his hand from your mouth. Sixty leans into your ear. "He means you." He whispers but you can only stare at the Captain, his soft face, unassuming features.

You flinch at the hand caressing your cheek, but Captain Anderson doesn't bother. He traces a finger across your face, gently collecting the tears.

"Have they been nice to you?" Connor asks as though he can't see himself, "I'm sorry I wasn't able to get here before. I'll stop them if they go to far again."

You can feel Sixty's grin slice into your neck. Above you, Nine's is muttering something. You can't focus on any of it. It's all mush, sludge as the Captain's face remains eerily soft.

You must have forgotten. These weren't deviant androids.

They were rotten men.

"Captain-"

"I keep telling you over and over again," he sighs. The door shuts behind him. He smiles.

You think the worst part is his LED: A circling, calm blue.

"Call me Connor."

[crownmemes]

Angry & Irritated Sentences, Vol. 15

(Angry and irritated sentences from various sources. Adjust phrasing where needed)

"Are you intentionally trying to get me to dislike you?"

"Can't we just agree that you're incredibly annoying?"

"Who I know and who I don't is no concern of yours."

"Why do you have to analyze things to death? Why can't you just let it be nice?"

"I can see what you're doing, and I'm not going to fall for it."

"What the devil have you been up to?"

"You know you're a nag? A very pretty one, but a nag."

"I can't just break into someone's house!"

"This is really stupid."

"Oh God, you don't dance as well, do you?"

"Why don't we just kill him?"

"Are there no depths you won't sink to?"

"I'm not going to get caught because of you or anyone else!"

"You know, I've got to tell you, there is bossy - which can be sexy - and then there's bitchy."

"Don't make assumptions about me!"

"Are you going to ignore me all day again?"

"Oh, I’m sorry, I thought we were having a state-the-obvious contest."

"You're an idiot! You nearly killed yourself!"

"I said no, so stop asking me!"

"Your very presence irritates me!"

"So somebody killed somebody. How is it my problem?"

"I'll talk to you any way I like!"

"Do you know your problem? You're insensitive."

"How far do you expect to get in life with an attitude like that?"

"You're behaving like a stubborn idiot!"

"You don't suppose you ought to be thinking about a proper job?"

"Are you thinking of doing something that has an outcome you can't live with?"

"Such a hero; always righting wrongs. Who cares who you have to manipulate?"

"You're not nearly as delightful as you think you are."

"That's an incredibly inappropriate question!"

"You know, when you're interested in something and nobody else is, the polite thing is to keep it to yourself."

"People think you have no inner censor. The fact is, you hold yourself back, because when you want to hurt, you know just where to poke a sharp stick. "

"Why are you so worked up over this?"

"I can’t believe you authorised this!"

"You know what's wrong - you're just too stubborn to admit it."

" 'I say what I think' is just another way of saying 'I'm an asshole'."

"So, when you say 'call me if you need anything', you mean 'don’t call me'?"

"Is the yelling designed to scare me? Because I'm not sure what it is I'm supposed to be scared of."

"I assume you have a reason beyond wanting to make me completely miserable?"

"You're sitting in my chair."

"You really think you can lie your way out of this?"

"You always were a terrible liar."

"Is that rhetorical?"

"Does your voice always get that high and annoying when you're angry?"

"I get that you’re not a big believer in the ‘catching flies with honey’ approach, but do you honestly think you’ll collect a jarful by cleverly taunting them?"

"I'm alive, and I want to remain with the living, understand?"

"What's it take to get you to fight like a man?"

"You always get your way, don't you?"

[thanatika]

people on that child support post are talking as if patho classic daniil is great with kids and it's pathologic 2 daniil that people are getting this negative idea of him from, which got me thinking...

daniil's main characterization of how he treats kids in patho 2 comes from artemy's POV of him, which is biased against daniil due to daniil making a really dickish first impression, and is also based off of unreliable narrator accounts:

first by some kids outside of rubin's house who lead artemy to believe that daniil refused to treat poisoned children when it was actually just dying dogs, which can be followed by artemy confronting daniil himself where he continues to misunderstand the situation and assumes daniil is calling children animals, until he finally visits the kids' warehouse and learns it was just the soul-and-a-halves' pets. which, obviously it would be a nice thing to save pets from dying, but he really ISN'T a veterinarian and there's a deadly plague starting. he's doing triage.

and then another early incident with the kid in the warehouse dying of sand pest, where notkin passes along a message telling artemy not to bother trying to save him that makes him sound very dismissive ("Don't waste your time on Patches, it's over for him"). reading between the lines though, it's pretty clear that he came to that conclusion not because he doesn't want to save people from the sand pest, but because this is a seemingly incurable disease with no medical cure, and at that point he probably hasn't had the chance to test the schmowders on himself so would have no reason to believe in their effectiveness, and assesses that loading patches up with drugs will just kill him. which, he's literally correct! whether you treat him with tinctures, pills, or a whole schmowder, patches dies that night. obviously trying to treat him or at least ease his suffering is a morally good dead, but you can also see the implied basis of daniil's actions, that every second is precious in the early stages of trying to prevent a widespread outbreak, so you shouldn't waste time on a patient who ultimately can't be saved. (which fits in really well not only with his arc in both games where he comes to the conclusion that the whole town is unsalvageable, but with the bigger emphasis on time management and manipulation that his remake has been described as having. hell, maybe from daniil's POV he knows for certain that patches will die due to whatever time manipulation that's going on with him, and that spending the time on that patient allows for a larger disaster to happen elsewhere). so, the situation is framed by notkin (understandably, because he's just a kid and that's his friend dying) and artemy (because he's honestly pretty petty about daniil) as just "the bachelor is an asshole and abandoned these kids" when it's more of a genuine ethical quandary.

he's also pretty rude and dismissive in how he talks about grace to artemy later on, but again, it's pretty clear that he's not just being a hater to a 15 year old for no reason, the point he's making is that she shouldn't be left in charge of a graveyard filled with potentially bio-hazardous corpses.

all that to say, the main canon info about how he treats children in patho 2 basically comes from the fact that a lot of kids end up disliking him, because he's extremely pragmatic to the point of being heartless, but still ultimately pretty understandable in what he's trying to do (stop a plague).

meanwhile when we do get to see his POV in the marble nest, i would say the way he treats children is pretty much consistent with how he talks to them in pathologic classic -- if anything, he's a bit nicer to them? he has some fed-up, yelling sort of dialogue options to the kids, but pretty much all of those are based on being upset that they're out breaking quarantine and putting themselves at risk of death. meanwhile other dialogue options make him come off very much willing to humor them and talk to them on their level. and when another adult is much harsher about the kids being irresponsible, he defends them, with no dialogue option to agree with corporal punishment:

meanwhile in pathologic classic, i do think that on the whole daniil is pretty nice to kids and willing to go out of his way to protect or help them (to the point of risking death, such as the late game sidequest where he can agree to go take on several soldiers to keep the father of two children from being wrongly executed). but he does also have some really unkind and spiteful dialogue options, like some of what he says to clara both in his own route and hers, and on the topic of corporal punishment...

[mxrtified777]

okay, i completely switched gears to somewhat coherent ideas, thoughts, and rambling instead of an essay. this doesn't really have anything new or groundbreaking, its more or less just me thinking out loud about nevin; so here, take what ive written in the last 2 hours

☆ I don’t believe that Nevin has the textbook-definition of a victim complex; he’s obviously going to be more complex than the first google result of a Victim Complex/Mentality, but he absolutely shares behaviors and tendencies with said textbook-definitions. He has been shown to deflect blame (“I’m sorry you feel…” / “I-I… It wasn’t a fight, I didn’t hit him, he…”), as well as (seemingly) having a tendency to catastrophize (“...No… but Nevin tends to assume the worst,...”). A key difference between him and a typical victim mentality is his optimism. He believes that things can and will get better and that he has control over elements in his own life. (“I wouldn’t say it’s too late.” / “The only way to go is forward. As someone who has lived in four different states, things aren’t going to stay the same forever.”) He’s hyper-vigilant about possible threats due to negative past experiences, particularly about people (loud coughing Edward). This is shown through Nevin complaining about Drew’s choice of friends, both being people that Nevin actively dislikes and doesn’t trust. (“Is that fucking Quinton?” … “Where the hell are you going with him? / “I said, I'll tell you later,” … “I can’t talk about this right now.” / “Have you been hanging around him behind my back?”)

☆ Nevin doesn’t actively use his trauma to elicit sympathy from others. The thing that separates Nevin from a victim complex the most is intention. He isn’t like “boohoo im so traumatized no one likes me let me do what i want im so damaged”. When he’s talking about his personal hardships and emotions (a rare occurrence) he’s not doing it to manipulate others into feeling sorry for him, he’s literally just sharing how he feels. So his feelings of being a victim are internal for the most part, but. I mean. Yeah, he was the victim

☆ Chris’s tendency to be blamed for things paired with Nevin’s tendency to deflect blame is. It's not going to be fun. Because yes, Chris is a pushover, but he didn’t hesitate to call out Nevin for being unreasonable in their bathroom screaming match. What I'm wondering is how/if this will alter as their relationship develops; will Chris become more tolerant of Nevin’s unjust behavior? Will Chris call him out for outbursts like this in the future, and will Nevin take offense to it?

☆ This is why you do your research, kids. So you don’t prepare for 5 hours for an essay and then you realize your topic makes no sense and can’t actually be proven

☆ Nevin lashing out when offered help by Drew (“What do you think you’re doing?... / “I’m healing you. What do you think?” / “You shouldn’t have. I did this to myself.”) is also considered to be a common behavior for people with a victim mentality. This scene also makes me wonder about how Nevin reacts to being helped/assisted, and a step further than that, being coddled/babied. He’s been the caregiver all his life. He’s been the protector; suddenly, having the tables being flipped on him where he’s the one being cared for is gonna be fun to watch. Like don’t get me wrong, Grandma Jovel is an awesome parent, nothing but unconditional love for her, but it’s obviously gonna be different coming from say Drew or Chris, and it’s also gonna be different between those two as well. We’ve already seen Drew be kind of that way with Nevin, at the end of their argument (“You’re not alone, Nevin. You have me,” … “Even so… I do need to be a part of this because I love you, and I don’t want you to feel alone.” / “Drew, stop that…” … “You’re going to make me cry, too.”)

thanks for coming to what i spent a collective 6 hours on today, im gonna return to being Silly with my boys now

[anyon-else]

They Lose Their Minds For Us (The Red Room pt.11) | Orochimaru had been waiting very patiently to get his hands on you. Now that he has, he sees no reason to delay his plans further than he already has. (Marvel AU) – spotify playlist | read on ao3

Pairings | Kakashi Hatake x Black Widow!Reader + Sakura Haruno, Sasuke Uchiha, Naruto Uzumaki, Orochimaru, Ino, Kabuto, Might Guy

Warnings | female!reader, ANGST, brainwashing, use of electrical shock (similar to scenes in captain america: the winter soldier), manipulation, violence, dissociation

Word count | 7.3k

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"I am the shape you made me. Filth teaches filth."

John Gardner, Grendel

Ino had known for a long time that Orochimaru wasn't the man he believed himself to be. The more she observed him, the more sure she was that his skills as a leader were lacking. To her, using primarily violence and manipulation to keep the Widows in check was a sign of weakness.

However, that didn't mean it had been easy to resist the urge to cower at his feet each time he approached her. At that point, she'd been trained to do so for so many years that it seemed easier to simply go through the motions. But she never followed orders out of fear—only habit and convenience.

When Ino looked at the man who had raised her, all she saw was a coward. A man so afraid to face failure that he refused to see reason.

And when HYDRA told him to stop his experimentation with mind control, his desperation grew into the delusion that eventually became his downfall. He held the belief that he was an irreplaceable asset to HYDRA despite—and maybe even because of—his dangerous ambition.

Ino first learned of Orochimaru's attempts at advanced mind control after his initial warning from HYDRA. At that point, their suggestion had been that he utilize the Winter Soldier program's memory suppression technology to make Widows more susceptible to suggestion and control rather than wasting so much on a string of failed experiments.

"Of course that method works for the brutes that they recruit as soldiers," she remembered him saying, "but your skills would not be served well by something so barbaric. Precision and caution is what will make this successful."

One month later, HYDRA followed through on their threat. The resources that had been given to the Red Room since its inception were no longer at his disposal, and his use of the minimal funds that he did receive were carefully monitored.

It was after that when he continued his experiments anyways that Ino last any semblance of respect that she had left for him. He started sending Widows on con-jobs like they were nothing more than petty thieves—all so he could get more money to fund his delusions. At the time, she would've called it pathetic. Now she knew that it was closer to insanity.

Soon after that, she met Sakura.

When they first met, the girl had been in the Red Room for long enough that she knew how to navigate it and avoid any necessary strain to her body and mind. The reason for that, according to Sakura herself, was because she'd met you. And for all that Ino disliked you, she was impressed when she heard that you'd helped Sakura as much as you did.

During the year that Ino spent with Sakura, she hadn't known about Orochimaru's refusal to inform HYDRA about Sakura's recruitment. He hadn't reported it, and he made it very clear to all of the Widows that she was to be kept a deeply-hidden secret within the circle that made up the Red Room. Her ties to SHIELD were even more carefully protected; Ino only knew about them because she'd heard it from Sakura herself.

Ino assumed that the secrecy was simply a precaution; it would be a disaster if SHIELD found out where Sakura was. It would expose the entirety of the Red Room and dismantle a vital branch of HYDRA. She learned later that Sakura was never supposed to be recruited. Orochimaru had simple been careless.

The day that you and Sakura escaped was the day that everything fell apart. The tightrope that Orochimaru had been walking for five years snapped, and Ino relished in seeing him fall.

Orochimaru had always given her more responsibility than the others. He took a liking to her early in her training for reasons that would probably always be a mystery to her—though, she did have her theories.

She often wondered if it was her refusal to treat him like a God that subconsciously drew him to her. Perhaps it made him believe that she was smarter than the others; that she somehow more advanced because she had seen through his manipulation. The thought almost made her sick.

His trust did, however, come with certain perks.

He had been angrier than she'd ever seen him on the day of your escape. It was unfortunately (and, if Ino had to guess, deliberately) timed. A representative from HYDRA's main branch had not even been in the Red Room for thirty minutes before Orochimaru was informed of your escape.

In the confusion that followed, Sakura's name was tossed around enough that HYDRA discovered the depth of Orochimaru's deception. Further investigation into Sakura's involvement revealed the unsanctioned experimentation that he had been conducting on top of his unauthorized kidnapping of a SHIELD trainee—an act that left HYDRA vulnerable.

Orochimaru was stripped of his title and position. The Red Room no longer belonged to him.

Ino remembered feeling the fruitless, fleeting hope that this failure would be the end of things. That Orochimaru would finally see reason.

But his delusions only became stronger as his anger grew. And now, that anger was directed towards you. You had stolen everything from him. You had created the chaos that led to his exposure, and it showed HYDRA the many flaws in Orochimaru's ability as a leader. Your actions went against everything that the Widows were taught to be. It completely dismantled the idea and purpose of the Red Room. Because of you, Orochimaru lost HYDRA's trust.

Ino knew an opportunity when she saw one. Next to Kabuto, Orochimaru trusted her more than anyone else in the program. But after he was removed, her loyalty was free-floating and subject to change. Orochimaru knew that, and his desperation became her advantage.

She never meant for you to become collateral damage—not that it changed what she knew had to be done.

Three months earlier

"Well?"

"They're sending me to kill her," Ino muttered, shielding the payphone with her body and attempting to look casual to the passers-by, "she finally left the SHIELD compound, so she won't be protected. It's the best opportunity to find her."

"Don't kill her," Orochimaru's crackled voice said through the paint-chipped phone. Ino couldn't help but roll her eyes. To her, you had always been something of a cockroach. Making it through the ranks of the Red Room by the skin of your teeth and surviving by pure coincidence, "I need her alive."

"Then what do you suggest I do instead?"

The silence on the other end of the line was far too telling. For how smart Orochimaru was, his current situation was creating too many intersecting roadblocks. Not even he had the capacity to sort through them all.

"Where is she?"

"The old archive bunker in Germany."

More silence. Ino didn't have time for this.

"If she was at the SHIELD compound, that means she's still with Haruno."

Ino felt anger flare within her at the mention of Sakura.

"She probably won't be alone."

"Just tell me what you want me to do."

Ino could practically hear Orochimaru's thoughts in the tense silence that followed her words. She was prone to challenge him—something that had gotten her into trouble a number of times in the past. But he didn't have that same power over her anymore. She grinned.

"I'll send a vial of saline with a syringe. The saline will contain a micro-chip that can track her location. Figure out some way to get her to inject it."

"Very helpful instructions."

Orochimaru paused. Ino waited patiently.

"Don't forget who you're speaking to."

Ino scowled at the phone and hoped that he could feel her contempt through the line.

"I'm the one who's going to get you back to the Red Room. One word, and I can turn my back on a failure like you."

Now Orochimaru's rage was almost tangible. She fought to hold back a delighted laugh when he heard a small huff come through the line. She knew of Widows who would've killed to have this kind of conversation with their tormentor. Coincidentally, you and Sakura were at the top of that list.

"I can still kill the girl whenever I want."

"And where would that leave you, hm? If you hurt her, you no longer have my loyalty. You already pushed your luck once when you took control of her after she escaped—and all for a failed attempt at petty revenge. Did you really think that killing Y/N would get you anywhere, or are you so susceptible to your impulses that you lack any self control?"

He probably wanted to throttle her. She reveled in the knowledge that he couldn't.

"Do what I'm asking," he finally said, voice tight with the barely controlled urge to tear her apart, "and Haruno lives."

"Good," Ino nodded to herself, already going through the details of the mission she had in front of her—she now had two conflicting goals to complete. Wonderful, "and how do you expect me to explain my failure to kill her to HYDRA?"

This time, the silence that followed felt sinister. A chill went down her spine when Orochimaru's dark chuckle crackled across the line and into her ear. She hated that he had any sort of effect on her, but he was an easy man to fear.

"Be creative."

Sakura had never felt pure rage before.

She thought she had. She'd imagined it like a balloon filling up in her stomach, taking up all the space and not leaving room for any other emotion. She had felt that before. That all encompassing anger that she'd heard people describe. She'd thought she understood.

But the moment she came to in Naruto's arms, she felt something snap. Like the balloon taking up all that space suddenly popped, and her rage was free to be released from within her.

She couldn't explain why. She just knew that her instincts were screaming at her, telling her that everything had gone wrong since that morning.

Kakashi's face when he came back to the car told her all she needed to know.

"What is it?" she asked quickly. Kakashi wasn't looking at her. If she hadn't known better, she'd have assumed that he was lost in thought. But he'd heard her. His faint grimace was proof enough.

"Do you remember anything?"

She wanted to scream at him. She wanted to beat her fists against him until he told her what he knew she wanted him to tell her.

She felt your absence like a vacuum sucking all of the air from her lungs.

"No," she grit out, attempting to keep her voice as even and patient as possible. Judging by Naruto's wince, she hadn't done a very good job.

Kakashi finally looked at her, and she felt something in her deflate at the expression on his face. She had only seen it a few times. It was close to devastation, but not quite there. Like he hadn't finished processing what he had seen, and he was trying to rewind and fix things before they were set in stone.

"Orochimaru came for Y/N," Kakashi told her quietly, voice even and as steady as he could manage, "she went with him."

"No she didn't."

You wouldn't have done that. She knew just as well as you did that if you were recaptured by Orochimaru, death would be a mercy. He would not allow your betrayal to go unpunished, and he would make sure that he kept you alive as a message for the others.

"She's gone, Sakura," Sasuke muttered. She turned her glare to him, gaze hard enough to pin him to his seat and keep him from turning his guilty eyes towards her.

"She's not gone. She's alive, isn't she? So why aren't we going after them?"

"It's not that simple–"

"From what you've told me," Sakura rumbled, standing from where she had been leaning against Naruto and facing her mentor with rage lighting her eyes, "there's nothing complicated about it. A deranged psychopath just took someone we care about. You saw the direction they went, and we have a car. If I'm missing something, now would be a great time to enlighten me.

"We were wrong about his tech," Kakashi said carefully. "If we try to go after her, he'll kill you. Y/N went with him to keep you safe."

Sakura seethed. What right did any of them have to decide that your life meant less than hers. What right did you have to decide that?

"I never asked her to do that. Which way did they go?"

"She wants you to be safe-"

"Get in the car and start driving.

"Sakura, he was killing you-"

"I don't care!"

Naruto and Sasuke flinched, but Sakura couldn't find it in her to feel guilty about her words. Not even when she took in the wounded look on Kakashi's face. He covered it quickly, but she had seen it clear as day.

"You're a coward," she bit out, putting as much venom into the words as possible. Either Kakashi had seen the insult coming, or he had already steeled himself for anything she could throw at him. Either way, his expression didn't change. "I thought you cared about her. I thought you all did."

"Sakura, stop."

"No. You have no idea...none of you have any idea what you've done. You should've just let him kill me. It would've been a mercy compared to what he'll do to her–"

"So she was supposed to go on living knowing that she could've saved you?" Kakashi asked harshly.

He didn't want this.

Of course he didn't want this. But he hadn't seen any other option. Orochimaru had backed you into a corner, and you'd made the choice that you thought was best. "Do you think she would've been able to live with that guilt?"

There were tears streaming down Sakura's cheeks, and Kakashi hoped that his breaking resolve wasn't showing on his face.

"I don't know what to do. Kakashi-sensei, you...you don't understand. Orochimaru is heartless. He's sadistic. He'll do anything to maintain his position, and Y/N took that position away from him. He won't just want revenge. He'll make an example of her in any way he can."

She couldn't take this. She couldn't stomach the idea of you back in your tormentors hands. The idea of you willingly giving yourself up to the person you feared more than anything else in the world so that she would have a chance to live. The thought made her nauseous.

Sakura fell to her knees as broken, choked sobs left her lips. She tried to keep herself from completely falling apart at Kakashi's feet, but the attempts were fruitless. Kakashi watched her fall to her knees and fought the urge to crumple to the ground with her.

"I can't let this happen," she whispered, "I can't. She won't survive. Even if we get her out, we won't get her back. I don't know what he's going to do to her, but she won't be the same."

Kakashi tried to keep himself from imagining what that could mean, but the images flooded his mind anyways. Regret began pushing against the barrier that he was trying to keep up in his mind, but he forced the feeling down. Sakura was finally safe. Your sacrifice hadn't been for nothing.

"We can't move in now. Not until we make sure he can't hurt you."

Sakura scowled, though she didn't begin another argument about the importance of your rescue over her safety. Kakashi was grateful; it was one thing to hear her call him selfish for letting you leave. It was another for her to say that he should've allowed her to die.

"For now, we'll assess and plan our next move."

"He said we'd have to wait six months before interrogating Shizune," Sasuke muttered, glancing up at Kakashi and ignoring Sakura's wide-eyed gaze shifting to him, "is that how long Sakura will have that...thing inside of her?"

"I don't know..." Kakashi sighed, rubbing his hands over his face, "I don't know, but we'll find out one way or another. Even if we can't get answers until six months from now, the important thing is that we know we'll get answers eventually. And from what he said, as long as we stay away, he won't make a move on us."

"So where does that leave Y/N?"

Naruto sounded devastated. Sakura wondered if this was the same conversation they'd had when she was taken. All of them looked completely defeated.

No. This wasn't close to the same. They'd begun looking for her immediately. You weren't going to be afforded that same luxury.

"We'll figure it out," Kakashi muttered. Sakura had been silent, trying to control her anger before she lashed out as someone who didn't deserve it. She knew it wasn't their fault. And the only person who could justifiably take the brunt of her rage was out of her reach.

Kakashi felt helpless. Like he had been thrown into a deep pit and had to watch a rope be lowered at a snail's pace, knowing that it was there but unable to reach it.

Unlike when Sakura was taken, the only thing he could do was find Shizune and hope that she would slip up and give him something before Orochimaru's six month limit had run out. Then they could start their search for you earlier than planned. Maybe they could get you out before any real damage was done.

Even as he thought it, Kakashi knew it was wishful thinking. Orochimaru wasn't the type to waste his time—especially with what seemed to be at stake.

He was desperate. And desperation was dangerous in someone like Orochimaru.

Shizune, as expected, gave away nothing. She repeated the same thing that Orochimaru had told him: she would be perfectly compliant in six months. If any attempt to torture the information out of her was made before then, she had a way of signaling Orochimaru. Sakura would be dead in seconds.

The logic behind the six month mark was lost on Kakashi, but he assumed that Orochimaru would be vulnerable for that time. He must've been confident in his ability to fend off SHIELD after the deadline had run its course.

The thought made Kakashi more nervous than he wanted to admit.

His nightmares returned in full force, and he wasn't surprised to find that you were added to the list of people who frequented his dreams. He usually saw your face, defeated and accepting whatever horrifying fate Orochimaru had in store for you. He saw himself reaching out, and ultimately grasping on to nothing but cold, empty air.

And Sakura, who for the most part had been holed up in the conference room to go over their map of HYDRA's bases, didn't say much more than five words to him each time they talked. It was clear that she was hurting, and he knew that she was trying to protect him from her own impending feelings of wrath and rage. She wanted to save it for the man who truly deserved it, but an effect of that was self-isolation.

But he knew he couldn't criticize her for it. He saw himself doing the same thing.

He was spending more time staring at a computer screen than he was sleeping, and he suddenly understood how you'd felt when you were up for days on end decoding. At that point, there had been little for him to do aside from skim the documents that you'd translated. He was left with plenty of time to sleep, and plenty of time to watch you work yourself to exhaustion.

Now he felt like a hypocrite. He hadn't slept in nearly 36 hours.

"You need sleep."

Kakashi closed his dry eyes, finally giving them some relief after staring at the same screen for hours without rest. Sakura's voice wasn't hostile like it had been the first few days after you'd left, but it wasn't exactly friendly. She sounded too tired to be upset with him.

"I'm the one who's supposed to say that," he said quietly. Sakura didn't respond, and she didn't move for a long moment after he had spoken. He waited silently, holding his head in his hands and hoping that this wouldn't be the end of their conversation. He could wallow in his own depressive thoughts as much as he wanted, but Sakura was suffering as much—if not more—than he was. He hated that she wouldn't talk to him. He hated that he didn't know what she was thinking.

"It's not your fault."

An involuntary shock of anxiety and guilt hit him as soon as he processed her words, and he did his best to keep his reaction from showing on his face.

"Sakura..." he forced a smile as he turned in his chair, meeting her eyes and doing his best to hold her gaze despite how sad she looked, "It's alright, you don't need to be worrying about me. You've got enough to think about–"

Before he could brace himself for the impact, Sakura crashed into him, arms wrapping tight around his neck. She was practically in his lap by the time his shock wore off and he was able to lift his frozen arms and reciprocate the affection.

"It's not," she repeated, holding him tighter as if to force him to accept the words, "and I'm sorry I made you feel like it was. I just...I'm so angry. And I took it out on you."

He listened to his student cry into his shoulder numbly, stroking a hand down her pink hair like it was muscle memory and holding her close on the small chair that he'd been living in for the past week.

"I just want her back," Sakura sobbed, "I...I can't help but think that I could've done something more."

"Sakura," Kakashi shook his head, "I know that it won't mean much to hear it, but nothing that happened was your fault. Both you and Y/N were victims of Orochimaru's torture. You couldn't have done anything against him if you tried—not with the leverage he had."

He could feel his heart cracking each time a broken, choked sob left her lips. Anything more, and he thought it might shatter.

"Haven't we been through enough?" she whispered, calloused fingers gripping the tough fabric of his vest. "What else could he possibly take from her?"

Kakashi could only keep Sakura wrapped tight in his arms where he knew no one could get to her. He knew that seeing his face would only make her uneasy. He felt as if all of the rage that was draining from her as she broke down was soaking into him. He wanted to tear Orochimaru apart. He wanted to rip the Red Room down brick by brick until you were the only thing left standing. Then he could bring you back unharmed and without the Widow's shadow looming over you. Then you could finally heal.

"She wanted to be here," Sakura muttered, calming her breathing enough to speak steadily, "and I wasn't the only reason she decided to stay."

"Dont do this."

"You made her feel safe here. That's why she stayed."

He knew the feeling.

"Take care of them."

Tears burned behind his eyes.

He wanted to hold you again.

Wanting was a new emotion for him. But now, he wanted so much that it made his chest ache.

He wanted you back.

Orochimaru gave his Widows everything. That was a very simple fact of life that he never hesitated to remind them of. He needed to make sure that they knew how much of their lives they owed to him. It was something they would never be able to repay, so they gave their lives back to him as a form of eternal gratitude.

He had never wondered how he would feel if one of his girls threw all of that kindness back at him like an unwanted gift. He had never even thought it was possible for something like that to happen. But you'd proven him wrong. You'd left, taking one of his greatest achievements and most dangerous investments with you.

You, on the other hand, had no value over any other Widow. You were part of a larger purpose, doing your part within the machine that operated so smoothly thanks to Orochimaru's handling.

But you'd disrupted things the moment you left with the girl. You'd betrayed him without a second thought and left him to pay the price of your disloyalty.

His fury knew no bounds. His bloodlust was immeasurable, and many had paid the price for you.

You'd caused their hurt, and now you had them to answer to them as well. He would make sure that everyone knew of your treachery.

And once things stabilized, he'd ensure the stability of his machine. He would never allow another broken Widow like you to appear within his ranks.

The feeling of coming to on the cold, hard metal of a poorly designed observation table was nothing new. In fact, the familiarity of your current situation made you wonder if you'd just woken up from a long, peaceful dream. You wondered for the first time since you escaped with Sakura if Kakashi, Sasuke and Naruto were just hallucinations you'd conjured to help you cope.

You were too out of sorts to really care; most of your mental energy was being directed at staying conscious and somewhat alert.

Your shoulder blades were pressed hard against the metal, and it only took another moment for you to recognize the feeling of leather strapped over your chest, arms, and legs, holding you down and restricting your movements completely.

While waking up groggy and disoriented had become a luxury that Kakashi helped you discover, you knew that what you were feeling now was more dangerous than your usual drowsiness. It felt like weights were pinning your heavy limbs against the cold metal beneath you, and your head was swimming with an uncomfortable mixture of throbbing pain and confusion.

"She's awake," a familiar voice said next to you. Your head was strapped to the inclined half of the metal slab with a strap across your neck and forehead, so all you could do was strain your body to try and get enough of a glance at the speaker to identify them.

"Ino," you muttered. The name sounded broken coming from your cracked lips, but it did the trick. Ino leaned into your field of vision with a grim, calculating look on her face. She was studying you carefully, though the one place she never looked was at your eyes.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, though she sounded too distracted for the words to be genuine. She was watching something out of view now, following its movement cautiously, "if there had been a better option, I would've taken it. But I did this to protect Sakura."

"'S okay," you murmured; as long as this—whatever it was—was helping to keep Sakura safe, it was merely an inconvenience, "I understand."

The tense furrow of Ino's eyebrows deepened at your words, and the unfamiliar expression on her face made a small, almost unidentifiable bubble of fear bloom in your chest.

"I really am sorry," she muttered after a long moment. Before you could say anything else, she was pushed aside and replaced by Kabuto. His eyes locked onto yours immediately, and his gaze was far less forgiving.

Kabuto gripped your chin in one hand and lifted a small flashlight above you. You winced against the bright beam that was shining in each of your eyes, but Kabuto's hand and the straps holding you down kept you completely stationary and at his mercy.

"She's lucid enough," he finally said, moving out of your field of vision and behind you where you heard the distinct sound of pacing, "is everything ready?"

The question wasn't directed at you, but rather behind you where the sound of pacing suddenly stopped. You felt the lump in your throat grow, blocking any air from entering or exiting through your mouth. Your breath hitched, and Kabuto spared an irritated glance in your direction before the third person in the room spoke.

"Yes. Let's get this over with."

Let's get this over with. Start the fight. Keep her still. End it. Hold her down. Don't move. The sooner you listen, the sooner we'll be done.

It was Orochimaru's familiar words that finally washed away the muck of your thoughts and gave you a clear memory of what had happened. Sakura's pain. Orochimaru standing over you once again. Kakashi asking you to stay.

Agreeing to leave anyways.

You opened your mouth, but your need for air overcame your desire to speak, and a flood of oxygen into your mouth interrupted any words from escaping your lips. You let out a weak cough and tried to ignore Kabuto's judgmental glare.

"Aren't you at least going to tell her what you're doing?" Ino asked venomously as Kabuto settled a metal headset on either side of your face. You saw the sharp edges of each side in your peripheral and tried to sink back to keep the dangerous-looking probes on the inside from touching you.

"What's the point?" Kabuto muttered, "it'll just make her panic. And she won't remember anything we say anyways."

"What does that mean?' you mumbled, focusing your tired eyes on Kabuto. He ignored you, though his continuous glances at Ino told you that he wasn't completely unaffected by her intensity. You could practically feel her glare from the opposite side of the room.

"If it's really that important to you, then you tell her."

When Ino reappeared in front of you, you tried not to let the sympathetic expression on her face sway your resolve not to panic. The last thing you needed to do was show Kabuto and Orochimaru the effect that they had on you.

"This is a machine that's been used on HYDRA agents for decades. It hasn't caused any fatalities, so you'll be...you'll survive," Ino grimaced, expression grim. "It's a memory suppressing machine."

You jolted against the restraints, unable to hold back a panicked string of words that sounded more like a pathetic whine. Ino winced, but you didn't have the mental space now to ponder on her uncharacteristic worry over you. Before you could think better of it and stay silent in the face of so much hostility, Kabuto stepped around Ino and stuffed a cloth in your mouth.

"Just try not to resist it, okay? I know it'll be hard, but the sooner they can wipe you, the faster it'll be over," Ino rushed out, "I've seen this before. If you start to remember things, they'll just start over again."

Your desperate "why?" came out muffled and barely audible through the thick cloth, but Ino had likely expected the question. Her answer was immediate.

"HYDRA would've allowed Orochimaru to keep experimenting with mind control if this was the method he'd used. This is how he'll regain his position, and you're the only Widow he had access to. All of the others belong to HYDRA."

"Please," you whispered, pressing your tongue hard against the fabric to try and speak clearer, "don't...I can't lose them..."

"You're fixing a mess that you created," Orochimaru finally spoke again, voice closer than you realized but still out of view. You flinched, eyes moving frantically over the space that you could see until Orochimaru finally stepped into your field of vision. "So, even though this machine will not do your physical talents any favors, I no longer care what happens to broken parts. I'll give you to them as a peace offering. After that, they can throw you away for all I care."

You stared at him, chest rising and falling and pushing painfully into the strap holding you down.

This man raised you. He held you when you were an infant. An attempt at his name was your first word.

"Three."

But he had never shown any real care towards you. He'd raised you with a certain set of expectations. You were obligated to him.

"Two."

This was only one in a long list of his demands for you.

"One."

Real care was different. It was kind. It was what Kakashi gave to his students. It was something you hadn't known existed, but something you now wanted more than anything. To feel cared for. To feel wanted for something more than just your ability to kill and lie and—

—

My ears. My ears hurt.

The screaming was so loud. It was disrupting any thoughts that might have persisted through the pounding of your head. You wanted it to stop. You wanted it all to stop.

Your fingers extended and clenched over and over, grasping for something that wasn't there. For anything that you could hold onto to keep yourself grounded. Something to keep your heart from beating out of your chest and bursting through your ribs.

My head...my throat hurts.

The screaming was close.

The pain was delayed. By the time it hit you, you'd realized that the screams you were hearing were your own.

Am I dying?

You head was splitting in half—it was ripping itself apart and then reforming just to tear in two all over again. Any thoughts you tried to conjure to keep yourself grounded slipped away each time that stabbing pain returned. Trying to hold onto anything real felt like it was just causing more torment.

Maybe letting go would be easier.

When the pain stopped, the roaring in your ears faded into high-pitched ringing. The aftershocks left you helpless and limp on the table, and you barely registered the hands on your face until another light was burning into your eyes. You squinted and flinched away from the fingers that reached towards you and held your eyes open.

"Dilated pupils," you heard a muffled voice say. You felt something touch your hand, then your wrist. After a moment, they located your racing pulse, "some low-intensity tremors."

Someone tapped your cheek, and you opened your eyes to see a blurry Orochimaru hovering above you.

"Do you know my name?"

You didn't even consider fighting against the answer that left your lips automatically. It seemed easier to just comply.

"Y-yes. Orochimaru."

"And your name?"

"Y/N Y/L/N."

"Are you still loyal to the Red Room?"

"I..."

Orochimaru slowly came into view, his eyes boring into yours and drawing a response from you. The pain from before still lingered, and you let the first answer that came to mind slip out without a second thought.

"I don't know..."

"Wrong answer."

—

"Who am I?"

"Orochimaru," you panted.

"That's right. How long have I taken care of you?"

"My whole life."

"Who are you loyal to?"

"I don' know. I'm sorry, I don't–"

—

"Who are you loyal to? Hatake?"

"Please stop..."

—

"It hurts..."

"It won't once you answer me correctly."

"I...I will. I'm loyal to you."

"Hm..." Orochimaru leaned over you, hand on your chin despite the straps already immobilising you, "what a shame. I don't believe you."

—

Hands were on you. It was distinctly different from the sensation you'd been feeling to this point. They were cupping your cheeks, patting them again and again until you forced your eyes open. Blond hair took up most of your vision, but you saw wide eyes and moving lips.

"Just let go," she was saying, head moving back and forth so that her blond hair fell onto your chest and shoulders, "submit to him, and I promise this will be over. It won't hurt anymore."

Her hair...blond hair...pink...

"Sa...kura?"

—

"You're loyal to me, correct?"

"Yes."

"Who else are you loyal to?"

"No one...no one else."

The restraints on your arms were released, but you didn't have the energy to move them now. They felt hundreds of pounds heavier than before.

"Open your eyes."

"Can't..."

—

"Open your eyes."

Your eyelids slowly cracked open, but you closed them against the glaring lights above you immediately. When you opened them again, you saw Orochimaru blocking the light. Blocking the pain.

"Who is that?"

He gripped your chin and turned your head to the side, giving you a clear view of another blurry figure standing in front of you.

The silver hair alone was enough to send a shock through your body. Relief filled you; if anyone's presence meant safety, it was his.

He stepped closer, and you saw the black outline of his mask, but something felt...off. He was colder than you remembered. His presence felt more dangerous.

"...Kakashi?"

—

"This is why the memory suppressing method is flawed. It ruins them. She'll never be on the same level as before. Soldiers can afford to be mindless brutes. Spies need to be able to think on their feet. She's losing that."

"It doesn't matter what you think. The only thing that matters is the result. Besides, didn't you say she's already a lost cause?"

"Of course she is. That doesn't mean I wasn't hoping for better results despite my reservations."

Cold fingers held your cheek, stroking over the skin in a soothing motion. You felt yourself relaxing against the cold metal table at the break from the pain, almost leaning into the cold touch. A touch that wasn't hurting...maybe that meant you were doing what you were supposed to. Maybe you wouldn't hurt anymore so long as that touch kept you grounded.

"It's a shame. So much time and effort spent on something so useless."

No more. Anything else would feel better. No more pain.

"We're done for the day. She's at her limit. We'll start over tomorrow."

The fingers stroking your cheek lifted, replaced with a palm pressed against the same spot.

"It's over. You don't have to do anymore today."

You saw the black hair and pale skin through your cracked eyelids. The face was blurry and barely recognizable, but you always knew when he was near. You didn't need to be looking at him to know when he was with you.

"You can rest tonight."

He stopped the pain. He made it better.

"Thank you."

One year later

“Naruto, do you copy?”

“I copy, sensei! Believe it!”

“Focus, Naruto.”

As far as his intel had told him, the HYDRA base that Kakashi found had been abandoned years ago. There was nothing in his research of the area that set off any red flags, so he decided that this would be a good opportunity for Naruto to practice some work in the field. At the time of Sakura's capture, Naruto had watched as Sasuke improved with alarming speed. Kakashi knew that he had begun to resent the other, but he had been surprised when Naruto swallowed his pride and asked Kakashi to take him on a solo mission. It had been a long time since Kakashi had gone on a training mission without Sasuke, and he almost forgot how energetic Naruto became without his friend to scold him. 

“Confirm your position.” 

“I’m in the building. It doesn’t really look all that abandoned, sensei.” 

“What do you mean?” Kakashi paused, pressing a finger against the comm in his ear.

“Well, don’t abandoned buildings usually have...I don’t know, cobwebs? There are no cobwebs at all.” 

Kakashi had sent Naruto to the South side of the building where the archives would be. This was one of the oldest HYDRA compounds that was still standing. From the information that Kakashi was able to find on it, there had been an accident in the lab, and most of the agents had either died or evacuated. It was unlikely that anything important had been left behind, but it was field work all the same.

“Does anything else seem off?” 

There was a pause, and then: “I guess not.” 

Something edged into the back of his mind. He had a bad feeling about this place.

“I’m coming to you, Naruto,” he spoke sharply in a tone that he rarely used. "Don't move–"

"Sensei, I don't wanna be dramatic or anything, but I don't think your intel was right."

"Naruto, keep your guard up, alright? I'm almost at your location–"

The cut-off scream that came through the comms made Kakashi's blood run cold.

He couldn't lose anyone else. He didn't think his heart would be able to take it.

"Sensei, wait!" he heard Naruto'd desperate voice as he turned into a dark corrider. On the opposite end, he saw the silhouette of his student along with another shadow just behind him, "it's hermmph–"

Automatically, he reached for the gun resting against his thigh and clicked the safety off before he had even analyzed the situation that Naruto was in. He slowed his approach and took in his student's struggling form. The enemy's leg was wrapped around Naruto's waist, keeping him from moving more than was manageable. One of their hands was covering the boy's mouth, and all Kakashi could see was naruto's wide and uncharacteristically terrified eyes. That and the gun pressed hard against the side of his head.

The face of his attacker was covered by a mask not dissimilar from his own, and the eyes above them were cold.

He also saw that they were almost more terrified than Naruto's in an expression that looked eerily familiar.

Naruto was screaming at him, but the enemy behind him was holding something in his mouth. Kakashi couldn't make out anything that his student was saying, but the look in his eyes wasn't just fear.

"If you hurt him, I promise that it will be the last thing you do."

Naruto began shaking his head furiously, but he went silent when his attacker pressed the gun harder against his head in warning. They sent him a glare with a clear message: any move he made would end with both him and Naruto dead.

Kakashi took a tentative step forward, meeting their glare with one equally as threatening, but he was surprised to see that their hand was trembling around the gun.

"Stop. Don't take another step."

Kakashi froze, paralyzed where he stood.

That voice...

Naruto was staring at him with wide eyes, willing him to put the pieces together. Kakashi shook his head despite himself, and Naruto answered his suspicion with a nod. The grip on his mouth tightened, and he stilled.

That was your voice. Those were your eyes. The fear in them looked the same as it did the first time he met you.

"Y/N?"

Your glare hardened, eyes icier than he'd ever seen them. He'd pictured this moment so many times—he'd seen it in dreams and in his nightmares. Images of you coming back unharmed, and terrifying scenes of you dead at Orochimaru's hand.

This was an entirely foreign fear that he had never thought to consider, though he supposed that was rather ignorant of him.

Orochimaru had given Sakura up for reasons that, until now, had been completely lost on Kakashi. He was beginning to understand that you'd simply been a convenient stand in.

I don't want you getting attached to another lost cause.

Something in him had cracked when you gave yourself up for Sakura. For him. To make sure that the family you'd been welcomed into could live peacefully rather than constantly fearing Orochimaru's influence over Sakura's life.

Now, after so long of looking and praying that he'd find you safe, he felt it shatter.

"Let him go," Kakashi muttered, still holding firm to the gun despite the shakiness of his voice, "please."

He couldn't lose Naruto too. He didn't think he'd be able to bear it.

"You're lucky I don't kill you both."

I'll teach you how to be human.

He would save Naruto. At any cost, even if it broke him to do what needed to be done. He knew that you would never forgive yourself if you were of your right mind.

He wondered if the person he remembered was even there at all. Maybe you were hiding away in the broken body that had been used and torn apart far too many times, safe and out of anyone's reach.

Naruto winced, and Kakashi saw the moment that you braced yourself to pull the trigger. He saw the confusion that took over your expression, and he read your thoughts like words on a page.

He wondered if Sakura would forgive him for this. He doubted it—he already hated himself for it.

Take care of them.

He pulled the trigger.

(previous chapter) | (next chapter) | (series masterlist)

Author's note | this chapter gave me trouble like y'all wouldn't believe. it went through a lot of changes, but i'm happy with how it came out. i added a lot in compared to when i initially started this series (i originally planned for nine chapters, but added so much in between the mission and this chapter that it ended up being much longer than anticipated). that being said, this chapter has been planned out since the beginning. the trick was getting it organized and making the exposition interesting.

i hope i did the big twist justice! i know i've hyped it up a lot, and i'm nervous that it didn't live up to expectations, so please let me know what y'all think!

i hope y'all don't mind too much that the chapters are coming out slower. i've been struggling with this part of the series and i really want it to come out well, so it goes through a lot of proofs before i post it.

anyways, thanks for reading this far if you have, and i hope you stay tuned for the next chapter! don't forget to leave some love if you enjoyed; getting comments from y'all is truly so so motivating, and it definitely makes for faster updates if i know that people are enjoying what i write.

title is from "Glory and Gore" by Lorde

[woodsfae]

Babylon 5 s02e16: In the Shadow of Z'ha'dum s02 ToC • previous episode

Dislike that they're turning the Narn refugees back unless they're injured. At least they're taking the injured, but damn, Earth won't take any refugees, even temporarily? That's awful.

Vir: Stop asking me things with uncomfortable answers. It makes me uncomfortable.

Not a great time to be a Centauri with a shred of a conscience, but a political position. Especially gross to be anyone dealing with fuckhead the asshole. Mor something?

Great hate speech by Vir, he's come a long way in expressing himself. It would be nice to see Shadow-lackey die a terrible death.

I, personally, would not name any kind of ship or vessel which I wished to remain in one piece, the Icarus. I'm not superstitious superstitious but I am a little superstitious. Don't wanna get on a submersible boat named Titan Titanic, either. Just seems like tempting fate. Or if not fate, then getting mocked in memes by teenagers after your ironic death.

Dun dun dun!! Shadow asshat was supposed to have died on the Icarus with Anna! Is she dead? Is any of that crew dead?

Morden. And he's on the station!

I reflexively distrust and dislike every single person who comes onto the station specifically to see Talia. Matt Stoner. Every PsiCorps episode. That time Kosh and the Guy With The Good Hat indulged in a little, light, mental torture to evaluate her. People just fuck with Talia and she deserves a break and a nice episode where she kisses Susan and relaxes a little.

This security guard taking Morden aside looks a lot like Willem Dafoe. But I don't think he is. Probably?

Morden's playing it slick, but Sheridan is in a bad bad mood. He's got a good explanation. He's a damned liar and he's AWOL. Just because he was assumed KIA doesn't mean he isn't still obligated to report back to duty.

But of course, Sheridan prefers to threaten him with making his legal status become his actual physical status (dead).

It makes sense that someone who's seen as much trauma and been traumatized as much as Stephen Franklin would need to talk it out. And it makes sense that he would have lowered inhibitions and feel compelled to talk about it when he's in the middle of another traumatic scenario. But the religious musings spoken through the characters' mouths is pretty tedious and not my favorite aspect.

Gross earthforce spy network setup.

Garibaldi being the voice of reason and urging adherence to moral guidelines is hilarious. Maybe that's what he needs: someone who's more of a loose cannon than he is, to keep in line.

This dichotomy is dumb. Message earthforce and be like "May I detain this AWOL member of earthforce that, surprise, isn't dead!" They're so suspicious and fascist right now, of course they'll support detaining him!

Idk if Talia going to help violate Morden's rights or not. And idk what Vir is going to disclose! Exciting!

The Centauri must go through so much hairspray. Vir's hair hardly even wobbles as he bobbles.

Literally it seems like all of thise would be resolved by calling Earthforce and telling them Morden's alive. I really don't understand why Sheridan isn't using the might of Earthforce to do all this with full military backing and support.

Two creepy shadow being accompanying Morden! I don't like that at all!

People really need to stop using Talia's abilities against her and to manipulate her into using telepathy against her better judgement and against the literal law. Super dickish. Sheridan's making a lot of indefensible calls in this one.

They need a therapist or twenty on board.

The Vorlon are so funny. All of the lesser races are as bugs to us….the Minbari are the best bugs and we prefer the best bugs to any of you annoying ones.

Deep Lore Dump.

The Ancients (who haven't "walked among us" in ten thousand years) fought the First Ones and (?) the Shadows over the millennia. They haven't been around since the last Great War. The Minbari were a space-going civilization at the time! Damn! No wonder they're so elitist! They've Seen It All.

So…Vorlons are some of the Ancients? Or at least they sheltered Kosh, an Ancient among their ranks? Wild that "everyone" will recognize him if he's out of his encounter suit. Or perhaps Kosh's idea of everyone is "everyone who knew me ten thousand years ago," lol.

Very grim outcome for the crew of the Icarus, but it does make me think that Anna will be back.

Anytime there's a debate about allowing mass death and atrocities for some future greater good, I don't care. Save the people in front of you. This WWII story is grim af. iirc, Britain was great at catching German spies. I should think they could totally have evacuated Coventry secretly. Really grim.

"What did you see?" "Nothing. Shadows."

Ewwww gross, Zach the security guard is going to be an earthforce informer. I really, really do not like the implications of a group of people with armbands being spread around to intimidate the populace.

This is a good decision by Sheridan. He's good at war, and it will be better for him to turn his energy into beating an ancient evil than to spin his wheels at B5.

Kosh saying he will die if he goes to Z'ha'dum doesn't mean he'll die if he fights the Shadows, imo. Many things in this show seem to revolve around loopholes, semantics, and pedantry. What if the Shadow leaves Z'ha'dum and is defeated in another place? That's a Sheridan-worthy escape clause from Prophecy of Doom.

next episode

[imaginefan]

You Don't Like Witches

Klaus Mikaelson X Fem!Reader Lucien Castle X Fem!Reader (mentioned.)

Word Count: 840

Requested: Anon

Request: Having a thing for Lucien but Klaus doesn't want you to be with him because he likes you but he doesn't want to admit it but his brother's and sister's know it cause it's obvious but reader witch doesn't see it. One shot the originals. :)

You had known the Mikaelsons for a long time now, you had helped each of them with some kind of problem and when they found out about Hope, they called you to New Orleans to help confirm the pregnancy and then protect the baby.

You had been in New Orleans for months now and that was when Lucien showed up. Klaus had always been an interest of yours but he never seemed to be interested in you and due to his deep mistrust and dislike of witches you figured the best that you could get was friends and Lucien, he was offering you something more than friends.

Klaus seemed to pick up your attitude toward Lucien and decided to confront you about it “what is going on with you and Lucien?” He asked. “What are you talking about, there's nothing going on.” You answered “sorry there’s no relationship for you to manipulate.” “What are you talking about?” Klaus asked “that’s not why I’m asking but he is the enemy.” “You were an enemy once…” You reminded him and he narrowed his eyes on you. “And yet you didn’t try to jump into my bed.” Klaus sneered. “‘M not trying to jump into his bed.” You said through gritted teeth as you finally turned to look at him, his arms were crossed over his chest and you decided that this conversation was going to get you nowhere so instead you walked towards the courtyard where the others had been waiting and likely listening in.

Klaus watched you walk away and go straight to Lucien “nicely handled brother.” Elijah said as he walked up to him. “Enough.” Klaus warned him. “If you want to keep her then you have to tell her otherwise he’ll get her.” Elijah said. “He’s right, you know… She really likes you, otherwise she wouldn’t still be here, no witch has put up with you for this long.” Kol reminded him and he glared at the both of them before looking back down at you, you were walking over to greet Hayley who was holding Hope, the little girl leaned over immediately to fall into your arms and you accepted the affection readily. “Plus she’s good with your daughter, surely that’s worth something.” Kol added as he walked away from his clueless older brother to see his niece.

“Why is your brother burning a hole into the back of my head?” You asked as Kol came to stand next to you. “He’s working something out.” Kol answered. “Does it involve the 100 different ways that he could kill me?” You asked. “Actually quite the opposite.” Kol assured you as he glanced behind you at Klaus, you assumed though you would never turn to look at him. “He’s really staring, did you do something?” Hayley asked. “Apparently he doesn’t like it when I talk to other people.” You answered. “That’s not surprising, he is territorial.” Hayley shrugged “I think it’s the wolf part.” “Stop that.” You ordered “he’s not territorial, he just doesn’t want me talking to the enemy.” “The enemy he lets in his house? Not much of a threat.” She smirked and you narrowed your eyes at her. “Both of you stop, both of them can hear you.” You reminded them and they both looked at you. “I know.” They both said at the same time.

You were putting Hope down for the night after getting her to go to sleep while Klaus dealt with the clean up for the day. “She’s asleep?” Klaus asked as he appeared at the door. “Yeah she’s just fallen asleep.” You answered as you pulled the covers up over her and made sure that her favourite teddy was within reach. “Can I have a word?” He asked and you looked at him and nodded. “Sure.” You answered “as long as you're going to talk to me and reprimand me for the company I keep.” “I wanted to apologise, I should not have told you what friends you can have.” He said and you raised an eyebrow. “You never apologise are you sick or something? Can hybrids even get sick?” You asked walking forward until you were close enough to put your hand on his forehead. Klaus rolled his eyes and caught your wrist pulling you closer while directing your hand away from his head. “Just accept the apology.” He ordered. “Or..?” You asked. “Or I’ll have to try something a little more convincing, little witch.” He answered moving closer. “More convincing?” You asked, he smirked as he leaned forward pressing a kiss to your lips, it was quick, you assumed he was teasing but you followed his lips all the same. “Give me a chance to prove that I can give you everything that you want and more.” He pleaded. “You actually want to do that?” You asked. “Why wouldn’t I?” He asked. “You don’t like witches.” You frowned. “I like some of them, you are one of them.” He smiled, pressing a kiss to your temple as you hugged him.

Requests and general question!

[tyetknot]

King of the Witches - A Review |  Chapter Four – Call Down The Spirits

King of the Witches Chapter Four – Call Down The Spirits

Introduction | 1 - The Young Initiate | 2 - A Magic Childhood | 3 - The Haunted Hill | 4 - Call Down The Spirits | 5 - Bewitched

When last we met we looked over Chapter Three, The Haunted Hill, (unrelated to Elvira’s Haunted Hills) where Sanders experiences visions of the Pendle Witches and also gets initiated to the Third Degree by having ritual sex with his grandmother. Why someone would make that story up about themselves and then willingly tell it to other people, I cannot say. Fortunately this chapter is way less fucked up and contains 100% less geriatric incest.

The year is 1943, Alex Sanders is 17, and starts attending Spiritualist meetings, probably because there was a girl there he fancied, and also to see if it had anything in common with witchcraft. I expect that the connection here is the visions he allegedly had on Pendle Hill.  He started training under them to be a medium but was covertly using witchcraft to obtain visions and perform healings through laying-on of hands. His talents in this area bring more people in to the Spiritualist church, which becomes quite large. One issue was communication with the dead: he was apparently uncomfortable with this because it was too close to necromancy “to which witches object”, although precisely how this is different from his earlier attempts to raise his grandmother’s shade I cannot say.

At work he met a young lady, Doreen (no, not St. Doreen, a different one),  and they got married on July 17, 1948. He was 22, she was 19. According to the book the marriage was basically doomed from the start, with Sanders feeling trapped and worried about his lack of advancement prospects, low wages and a baby on the way. He can’t work magic to advance in his field because witches cannot work alone (there’s that idea again) and Doreen has no idea he is a witch anyway. This point is contradicted by other Sanders material, such as interviews where he comments that she disliked his unusual religious practices, especially that of working in the nude. Confusingly he has visions of himself being wealthy and successful, wearing fine clothes amid glamourous friends in a splendid ballroom, but once again visions of death as well – this time of a woman.

His medical lab work gives him the opportunity to compare industrial formulae with those of witchcraft recipes which sometimes leaves the industrial items wanting, and is unaware that his marriage is falling apart, with his wife spending much time at her mother’s. Along comes baby Paul, and three years later baby Janice who was born with a twisted foot. The doctor says this can be corrected but it would be best to wait until she was 13 or 14, but Sanders works some magic to find out what to do, and is told to rub olive oil into the joint, which he then manipulates back into place. Good as new!

Sadly this miraculous recovery does nothing to help the failing marriage, until one day when he was 26 (1952 or 1953) he comes home and finds that Doreen has packed up and left, with the children. Soon afterward his workplace burns down, so now he has no family, no job, and no prospects. His sister Joan spends a lot of time with him consoling him, and one day suggests they re-decorate the kitchen. They stay up all night painting, and realize it is Shrove Tuesday (assuming this happened in 1953 it would have been Feb 17th). They make pancakes and Sanders confesses to Joan that he practices witchcraft, telling her what I hope is a sanitized version of what happened with his grandmother. She disbelieves him, mockingly telling him to conjure up a demon.

Apparently Sanders kept his witchcraft tools just lying about (did he stop trying to hide things after Doreen left?), because he grabs his athame and starts conjuring up a demon, “someone they both knew” (where did he get this conjuration from?). This presumably works, because someone actually does come and knocks at the door – a family friend in need of a place to stay at three in the morning. Joan refuses to let him in the house.

Frightened, Joan tells him he has to stop playing with magic, but the embittered Sanders just goes off on a tear about all the ways life has let him down (in this modern age I wonder if he would have become one of those blackpilled incel Redditor types) and has no wealth, money, or prospects, and that he will start using magic to get it – wealth, luxury, leisure. Nevermind that he had just told Joan magic shouldn’t be sued for selfish ends! He sets up a magic Circle and gets ready to work.

“By the light of candles he described a magic circle with his sword, excluding Joan. When she made as if to speak he told her to keep quiet, or get out. The air became heavy with incense as he worked the spells and recited the words that would lead him from white witchcraft to black. ‘By all the powers I command the demons to bring me wealth, riches, power…’ Joan sobbed quietly, not understanding all that was going on but realizing that her beloved brother was bargaining for his soul with the devil and that, in the end, someone would have to pay.”

OK, so this is the part I have some major questions about, namely: where did he get this ritual from? At this point in his story he hadn’t had contact with any other witches or magicians, he hadn’t read anything on the subject anywhere, so…..was this ritual in his grandmother’s Book of Shadows and then copied by him into his own? Why did she have this? Where did she get it from? What spells was he working? Was this some fancy Ars Goetia-style conjuration kind of deal, or what? And which particular demons? All of them? To the best of my knowledge this sort of demonic material isn’t exactly, uh, common in traditional Wiccan material (unless those Third Degrees are keeping it all to themselves, the greedy buggers), and I can’t see how Sanders would have come across any of this kind of thing.

Obviously this is all complaining on my part because Sanders didn’t actually have any contact with witches of any sort until he saw the Crowthers on TV in 1961, but it’s the lack of internal consistency in the narrative of his life that he is presenting here that bothers me. I don’t think of myself as being extremely intelligent, I’m a college drop-out for God’s sake, but even I, being a simple Canadian of humble means, am able to see massive plot-holes in the story presented here, and it’s bugging the shit out of me.

Join us next time for Chapter 5 - Bewitched, in which things Get Weird again.

[ravenclaw-alum]

i don't understand why so many fans ignore the fact that tyler was manipulating wednesday. either they like or dislike him, they ignore the fact that tyler was acting in 90% of the entire show. i just roll my eyes at some fans saying he is a better love interest because he's the nice guy who always accepts wednesday and doesn't understand why the show made him a monster. completing ignoring the fact that tyler "accepts" wednesday to keep her close. my red flag was when even Enid rightfully got mad at her, he didn't. instead he prepared the whole date. it was a red flag because i didn't see him as a doormat. also tyler was xavier's bully and we're never 100% sure if he actually regrets that when it's revealed he ended up enjoying killing while being the monster. then there are some fans who dislike tyler because of how he sometimes treated wednesday. the famous signals quote is always mentioned but often without the acknowledgment that it was tyler's manipulative tactics to keep her close. they assume that those are tyler's genuine actions, but it's not. it was 100% clear that it was all an act. the moment he decided he's done with the acting, he mocked wednesday in the police station. when she was going to be used for the rite, he showed no guilt. he didn't hesitate when he tried to kill her. the show was absolutely clear about showing tyler not having any inkling feeling for her. honestly, season 1 was just a detective show from wednesday's point of view and both love interests were used as suspects, therefore the show never gave us clear understanding of both. is xavier a monster or not? well, he's not. you think tyler is a nice guy? we're at the end of the show, and we're going to reveal he's the bad guy completely throwing out his whole nice guy characterization into the window. if he appears in season 2, we'll actually get to see the real tyler in more details.

We have no indication any of his interactions, outside of maybe the first one in the coffee shop, were genuine. Or any indication he changed from being a bully because he wanted to stop being one, instead of pressure from his dad and possibly Thornhill not wanting him to draw attention for himself. If I'm remembering correctly, he wasn't in therapy by choice, but rather by force.

Additionally, when Enid, Tyler, and Wednesday are investigating the old Gates residence, Tyler seems to be in full control of the Hyde when he attacks them, because he's able to call out to them in the middle of the attack and pretend he was attacked by the creature. To me, that shows control, malice, and forethought. Even though when he saved her as the Hyde at the beginning of the show, he did it because she needed to stay alive until a certain point. We can't even be sure how much of him helping Thornhill was her control. Considered how he bullied Xavier and others in the past, it seems like he didn't like outcasts before. Maybe he still doesn't like them and part of him wanted Crackstone to succeed.

I also can't help but think of he helped her find evidence at different points on purpose, so that when she reported it and it was gone, it would harm her credibility.

With what we learn by the end of the season, the relationship between Wednesday and Tyler in the show isn't healthy. He's lying and manipulating her the entire time, and that's made worse by the fact that I believe he's two years older than her (the two years between 16 and 18 are much bigger than the two years at other points in life, like 19 and 21).

[crescentnebulalala]

Backup

My ex and his best friend have been close for more than a decade, they grew up in the same neighborhood. Let's call them A and B. We both graduated from the same high school, but I didn't know either of them at that time. A and I attended the same university, where we built our relationship. B is exceptionally smart; he attended one of the best universities in the world. They're such good friends that they chat every day. I even thought they might be gay before getting to know A!

Back to the topic. B and I met less than 10 times. On holidays when I went on dates with A in our hometown, sometimes B would came along. He was just there, walking, eating, or silently watching A and I flirt. He seldom talked, but the three of us played video games together from time to time. I assumed he might just really like A and cherished every moment they could spend together. I even thought he might dislike me because I took too much time with his best friend.

Two years ago, A created a group chat containing the three of us for the convenience of exchanging game information. One day, B was sad, saying he might be alone all his life and would never find a girlfriend because none of the girls would like a bald guy. I casually said something like being bald is not a big deal, Prince William is bald too (B is a little bald but not ugly).

After almost four years together, A and I couldn't work it out. We didn't share many hobbies, and our conversations became like a chore. I couldn't bear his bad temper (he accidentally broke my wrist because I wouldn't go somewhere with him). I was hurt so much that I decided it was time to end it all. I wrote a list of reasons to break up, texted him that we were over, and completely blocked him.

A apologized a lot and sought(I'm not sure now) help from B and my best friend to convince me to accept his apology and add him back. My best friend told me B added her friend and asked if she thought A and I were truly over. I guess B was just curious at that time. Then B himself asked me why I broke up with A; he thought we were so sweet together. I confided in him a lot about disputes and arguments between me and A, and he said he found A was good at manipulation. This was the only long conversation we had during the four years we knew each other.

Then A changed his number, kept calling and texting me for three months. I ignored him. Half a year ago, he sent me a message telling me he still loved me. I still ignored him. After that, A stopped bothering me. One month later, he got a new girlfriend. During the following months, B texted me two or three times for small talk, which I also ignored, thinking it was A trying to send him to fix our relationship.

In January, B wished me a happy new year, and I responded politely. On the winter holiday, we both returned to our hometown. B asked me if I had time to hang out, mentioning there was a really good movie we could watch together if I hadn't seen it.

I thought it was fine; A had a new girlfriend, and they just wanted to meet some old schoolmates. I could go and show that we both moved on, no need to be enemies after the breakup. With B's presence, it wouldn't be a big deal for old schoolmates to watch a movie together.

I was shocked to find B was alone.

Me: You're alone? I thought A and you would come together! B: Do you want him to come? Next time I can bring him too if you want to see him! Me: No, never mind. I still hate him. B: You still hate him? He still wants to add you back. Me: Nope, not a chance. Did he know you asked me to hang out? B: Of course not! How dare I let him know!

We then had some casual normal talk, watched the movie, and ate dinner. After dinner, he suggested he walk me to my home. I refused, but he insisted. While walking through the crossroad, he tentatively put an arm around my shoulder. I swiped him away, asking what he was doing. He didn't answer, just said, "Let's stay here a little while," and pulled me into his arms firmly from behind, suddenly kissing me.

Why didn't I resist? Because I was totally shocked! My mind was empty! I thought it was a fake world! This scenario wouldn't happen in my wildest dreams! There is no way for someone with minimal dating experience to have the courage to kiss a girl he actually talked to fewer than three times! I was numb. I could feel his heartbeat and passion. I didn't know how to move.

When I recovered a little bit from the shock, I pushed him away and said the only thing that came to my mind was, "Are you drunk?"

B: How can I get drunk with just bubble tea? Me: Don't you think this is extremely strange? B: Nope, how? Me: I'm the ex of your best friend! B: I know. Me: Oh, you know? I thought you forgot! What if he kills you? B: Are you still caring that much about him? Me: No... but... He kissed me again, and this time with tongue!

Then he said something vague like he had missed a lot of things and not wanting to miss this time. He found I was a unique girl and didn't expect me to agree to go out with him. He was afraid of being refused. I was so innocent of agreeing to go out with a guy in a private place like the cinema.

To my knowledge, he only dated twice, but neither relationship lasted more than three months. He is shy and doesn't know how to talk to a girl. But I am still afraid. I am not sure I know him anymore. How the hell did the timid boy I had known for years suddenly hug and kiss me when I had no idea I was dating? We haven't seen each other in person for two years! And my ex and I didn't share a kiss until we were in a relationship for the second month!

I admit I have a thing for smart guys; I think he is a good guy as a friend, but I'm really afraid of being used and getting hurt again. I'm afraid he kissing me not because he likes me, but just because he wants to use naive me to practice his technique with girls. Especially when he is not so enthusiastic in responding to my messages after he went home. And I haven't heard anything from him for two days (for now).

Lots of questions flew across my mind. Is he a nerd with not much EQ not good at starting a relationship, or is he just playing with my feelings? Or maybe he's desperate to find a girlfriend so he tries asking every girl out he has known? Or is this some kind of malicious joke my ex and he are playing on me together? He said I am not like other girls. Other girls would refuse to go out with him at the beginning. Oh my, What should I do now?

[campbluelake]

WE’LL BE ABLE TO FLY | MM Inves Start (4/4)

Maybe this development is expected, or maybe it isn’t, given the discussion that was going on just before this. Even if you’re not surprised, to see one of your number now twice returned from the dead (or three times, given his own admission?) and a demon to boot is undoubtedly a lot to take in. Whether you liked or disliked Niko– an easy stance to hold, given his harsh personality, which perhaps now makes a bit more sense– who would have expected this from a man so weak and unassuming that he was the first killed here?

Seeming uncomfortable with giving people time to scrutinize him or voice any thoughts, Niko plows on. 

“…Surprise. If you hadn’t figured it out by now, I’m the one you’ve all been calling the Interloper. I didn’t come up with the title, for what it’s worth. I’m just a reaper, not that I assume the one who gave me that fancy name was aware of that. And I’ve been holding onto your souls. Stopping them from passing on for– well.”

He sighs, tail lashing once. 

“It looks like you assholes got into my office, so you probably know some things– without any context, I’m guessing, just my luck. I don’t know how much I can actually explain, is the thing–” A grimace crosses his face. “…I have to be careful about what I say. This is someone else’s realm, if you hadn’t guessed from the, uh… goop. The power here has my throat burning if I even try. I’d probably spontaneously combust if I went too far. But–”

After a brief grimace, apparently remembering the last time he’d tried to speak about what was going on here, Niko runs his hand through his hair and glances around the group. 

“That’s fine! You all don’t have the same limitations, and I’ve been doing what I can so you can stop this. That is, uh…”

If anything, looking at him… you might think he’s a bit embarrassed.

“…Well, since Max laid down his ultimatum, I started, uh– trying to manipulate some things in this place, just a bit, in minor ways. To get you the information you need. But, uh. It made me pretty tired to do it without being detected, and I, err. I think I tripped over something? And fell? A lot? …And then you guys thought I fucking died?!”

So it seems that the theories that the “murder” the dead had been trying to solve was nothing but a comical accident were right. Go figure. 

“I just woke up to someone fucking yelling at me…”

…A suspicious gaze is turned onto Max for a moment.

“…I’m not sure what happened with the cabins either, actually. I don’t have the power to make changes that extreme, so, uh… huh. Well, maybe there’s something for you there, too. I’ll keep an eye out in case it’s dangerous, don’t worry. And Max can watch out for you guys, too, since he doesn’t have the same kind of restrictions I do.”

He hefts the scythe he’s holding, twirling it to rest on his shoulder, and gestures his free hand towards the group. You all!

“That’s right– like I said, because of a bunch of bullshit regulations and shit on top of the fact that I don’t have much power to begin with, I can’t really do anything but be a pain in the ass– my specialty! But you all can do more. Everyone underestimates humans, y’know. There’s no regulations in place stopping you from doing shit. They’re using all their power to keep reins on me and Max, but that leaves the door open for you. They’re so focused on stopping this realm from collapsing that they can’t stop you. We’ll keep you safe until you catch them.

And after you find them, we’ll get rid of them. You’ll stop them. And then–”

His hand clenches around the handle of the scythe, and it dissolves into shadowy mist. Niko’s gaze, having ranged between bored and irritated, suddenly fills with determination. Several times he’s claimed to be annoyingly stubborn, and this shows through now. 

“Everyone is going to escape this hellhole. Living and dead. You’ll–” There’s a brief, stuttering pause. “We’ll all escape. …I can’t say more until this is over, or they might try to change things to stop me. But… we will.”

He takes a deep breath, slightly shaky, and then sweeps his hand out again at the group, living and dead. 

“You all have to do this. Aren’t you mad? Aren’t you fucking pissed about what you’ve been through here? Then put an end to it with your own hands! You have the most power here, now– more than any of our magical bullshit. Put it to good use, and take control over your fates now that you finally can.”

[yandere-toons]

Really??? Great! Sooo I’ve been having a crush recently on the famous “ Sun Wukong the monkey king “ and there was a cool movie called “ the monkey king reborn “ and it’s a great film! I was hoping to make requests on it ⭐️

Yandere Sun Wukong the Monkey King (Platonic & Romantic Headcanons)

Warnings: references to violence + death, psychological manipulation, toxic mindset.

A.N. – Thank you for introducing me to this visually stunning film. I'd like to write about it again.

Platonic:

When Sun Wukong deems someone an enemy and strikes them in defence of his friend, it often becomes Tang Sanzang's job to coach him back to a peaceful state of mind. Sanzang repeats to him that monks are creatures of temperance and should not be so desperately invested in any one relationship. Wukong struggles with the idea of, in his opinion, giving up a person who sees him as he deserves to be seen when such respect is in short supply.

Regardless of the truth, Wukong views his friend as one of the few who gives him the appreciation he is owed. This favour is repaid by way of inspecting anyone who approaches them and stopping the conversation with demands for the individual to take their disrespectful carcass out of his sight if Wukong gets the impression that they are being disingenuous or are insulting his friend. He is sensitive to rudeness because he has endured so much of it, and watching his friend endure the same is among the fastest ways to provoke him into a fight.

In addition to acting as a protector, Wukong has looser morals than Sanzang would prefer to admit and is inclined to steal anything that his friend wants or needs. His status as a trickster god and the past instances of deities shaming him for existing and wishing to be included have made him indifferent to most rules. Wukong sees no gain from obeying people who dislike him for reasons out of his control, and he instead finds pleasure in sharing material desires with his friend in exchange for praise.

Since his time in the forests of Mount Huaguo, immortality has been a great source of curiosity for Wukong. This desire to prolong his life extends to his friend, whom he wants to accompany him through the journey no matter what laws of nature he must break. Because Wukong enjoys eternal life, he assumes they will, too, or at least will come to appreciate it over time. Wukong jokes about making his friend immortal to gauge their willingness, but if they are ever in danger of imminent death, he pursues the Peaches of Immortality and Grass-returning Cinnabar with a degree of ruthlessness that ignores all complaints and exterminates all obstacles.

Romantic:

Even though his physical abilities surpass those of almost every other being in existence, Wukong is a frequent victim of envy. He strongly believes that he is not given his dues both by his fellow deities and the general population. Zhū Bājiè and Sh�� Wùjìng are initially quite interested in meeting his partner, but they come to learn that Wukong grows moody and a bit hostile when his partner's time and attention are occupied by someone else.

It takes a long time for Wukong to let his guard down with the world, but before this changes, he is convinced that his partner is under constant threat from demons, humans, and deities alike. He is quick to defend them in arguments and take the blame for whatever caused the disagreement, resorting to threats and his shapeshifting staff Ruyi Jingu Bang to ward off the aggressor. Once Wukong is riled enough to engage someone in combat, he tends not to stop until his opponent is either buried in the ground or begging for forgiveness.

Wukong comes close to treating his partner as an equal. He does hold them in higher regard than he holds all others except his master, but due to his short temper, this is often expressed in less than charitable ways. A recurring method is to attack those who Wukong suspects of meaning his partner harm without offering his partner an explanation until the person, who he claims is possessed by a demon, is beaten or even dead.

Sanzang worries for the health of his disciple and encourages Wukong to restrain his darker impulses. These teachings are more effective when his master is around to chastise him, for Wukong is eager to avenge any perceived wrongs done to himself and his partner. The instructions to control his emotions only push him to act in the shadows and play innocent near Sanzang, which is tested every time Bājiè has the urge to report Wukong's attacks and widespread antagonism to their master.

[innocentimouto]

Jet is not worse than Iroh

Defending Jet feels weird sometimes because I don’t condone what he did but I also really understand how it happened and still consider him a good person.

People can like or dislike any character, but something has always pissed me off with how people talk about Jet and I finally found a coherent way to express it.

Let’s look at Iroh. He fought in the war and killed many people to the point he made himself known across the Earth Kingdom. He was once friends with the Rough Rhinos who were the cause of Jet’s loss. He breached the walls of Ba Sing Se and the only reason why the Fire Nation didn’t succeed then was because Iroh lost his son.

Iroh was an adult. Iroh was a powerful firebender. Iroh had strong political power. Iroh had an army. Iroh could go anywhere he wanted. Iroh lost his son at war as an adult.

Yet the fandom:

 praises him

says he’s a great person

even wants him to be Zuko’s father

feels horrible he lost his son

says he felt sorry

doesn’t see a reason why any character should hate him

and will argue it was the propaganda he was fed

Now Jet manipulated the Gaang into flooding a village. We don’t know much about Gaipan beyond that there were soldiers there, but the show didn’t color in the scene of Sokka warning them (wonder why). I think we could assume there were EK civilians there. The only reason why no one died was because the Gaang interfered.

Jet was a child. Jet wasn’t a bender. Jet had other children fighting with him. Jet had nothing to his name. Anywhere Jet did go there were Fire Nation soldiers. Jet lost his parents as a child. Jet lost his home.

Yet the fandom:

demonizes him

calls him a monster

compares him to the Fire Nation

barely acknowledges his trauma

only considers him remotely likeable because he tried to change

or still doesn’t think that’s enough

believes there’s no way Katara could ever forgive him

and will argue he should have seen past his prejudice and trauma

If people look at Jet and condemn him, Iroh should be treated even worse because he was in a much better situation and did worse. He had wealth, he had a nation supporting him, he was an adult.

What did Jet have? Trauma, a home where soldiers are constantly passing through, a bunch of other orphans to take care of, a nation that’s losing more and more, a nation that doesn’t care about orphans, and a mind and body not old enough to deal with it (if you could be old enough to deal with it).

Jet didn’t even kill anyone. Iroh killed hundreds if his title is anything to go by  and would have probably won the war had his son not died. Meaning he didn’t stop because he wanted to. He stopped because he was forced to.

Which is the same thing as Jet except every other disadvantage Jet had.

What about Jet is worse than Iroh? What about Jet makes people say he should have seen passed his anger and trauma, but Iroh is excused as a functioning adult? Even people who like Jet act like he’s worse than Iroh or that it will require a lot for him to be accepted by the Gaang.

Oh Iroh was fed propaganda his whole life.

Yeah and Jet was fed death and killing and homelessness and cruelty at least half of his life. I wonder what that does to a person.

Jet didn’t get the opportunity to see the Fire Nation living as regular people, but Iroh sure did with the Earth Kingdom and he still killed them.

Also Jet actually cared about the war and what happened to his people. Iroh did nothing until the very end. He didn’t fight in the Invasion, and he never confronted Ozai.

Jet would never

[marvelslut16]

The one with two Pietro’s

Pairing: Pietro x reader, Wandavision!Pietro (Peter Maximoff) x reader FORCED 

Synopsis: you find yourself in Westview living with Wanda, Vision, the boys, and your boyfriend Pietro. But happens when you start to remember your Pietro and figure out what Wanda’s doing to you and everyone else? 

Word count: 1.4k+

Warnings: Swearing I think. Angst. Fluff if you squint. Mind control. Forced relationship. Briefly mentions the idea of a forced magical pregnancy. Bullet wounds. Death. Grief I suppose. Mentions pmsing. The over use of italics. Kinda feel like I make Wanda a psychotic asshole. SPOILERS FOR WANDAVISION!

A/N: This was so much fun to write! Probably the darkest thing I’ve ever written, if you can really call it dark. Writing for Wandavision was a fun little challenge. Takes place in the 90′s so my title is a reference to friends, and so is a tv show character I use in the one shot. Pretend Evan Peters’ hair isn’t that blonde cause I will always see him with the silver he has in xmen and wrote him as such. 

"Vision, that's not my Pietro," you mutter in horror to your friend as the two of you stand in the kitchen. 

You’re not quite sure what makes you say it, but you’re glad you do when you glance at the new Pietro in the living room, he's been playing video games with Tommy and Billy for close to an hour now. He's sweet and funny, but he's just not your Pietro.

"I'm afraid not, (Y/N)," Vision's voice is sullen, but he's glad you're not in on Wanda's mind games. Unless you are, and this is just another way for Wanda to mess with him. He’s not quite sure what’s happening, but he knows from what you’ve reminisced in passing to him about Pietro on nights when Wanda isn’t in the room, that that’s not the Pietro you know and love. 

"Oh my god," you murmur, hand coming to your mouth as little bits and pieces of memories race through your head. The genuine pain, horror, and sadness that cross your face make it obvious to Vision you're being manipulated like everyone else, even if you are Wanda's oldest friend. "My Pietro, he had an accent."

Your knees buckle when you hear his native accent saying his catchphrase in your head, 'you didn't see that coming.' Vision rushes to your side to help you stand more firmly.

"His face was longer, hair a white blonde not silver, his body more toned, and he had gorgeous blue eyes- bluest eyes I've ever seen," you grip onto Vision's arms as you imagine moments with your Pietro.

You grew up in the cell beside his and Wanda's, immediately forming a sisterly connection with her at a young age while Pietro hated you. He would tease you, pull on your pigtails, and steal some of your food on the off chance you three were eating outside of your cells. Over the years the teasing turned to flirting, and your dislike for him turned into a huge crush.

One night-a night you can normally remember with full clarity- after Hydra fell and before Ultron, the two of you were out on a walk, much to Pietro's chagrin. You were telling him about this new book that you were reading and how the characters annoyed you so because they were obviously in love but wouldn't admit it. Pietro zoomed in front of you, causing you to smack into his chest and almost fall to the ground, you would have if not for Pietro's arms wrapping around your waist and bringing you close to his toned chest.

The wind was blowing his hair into his eyes ever so slightly, so without thinking you reached up to move it out of his face and away from his eye. The small act of tenderness that you had displayed caused Pietro to give into his desires, he leaned in and his wind chapped lips descended onto yours. You melted into the kiss, clinging tightly to his biceps to ground you. One of his hands slipped down from your waist to squeeze your ass, the other wrapped more tightly around your waist and kept you anchored to him.

"I love you, Printesa, I have since we were kids," he admits when you pull apart for air, leaning his forehead on yours.

"I love you too, Quicksilver," you use the superhero nickname he gave himself when you were twelve. He grins before attaching his lips to yours once more, it was an unforgettable kiss that filled you with warmth and hope for your future.

"(Y/N), are you okay?" Vision's voice brings you back to reality, or whatever this is.

"No," your voice cracks as you remember the last kiss Pietro planted on your lips, right before he protected Clint. The memory that still haunts your dreams, seeing him with all those bullet holes and knowing there was nothing you could do to save him. "What kind of person forgets the love of their life? I'm a terrible person Vis!"

"No you aren't (Y/N)," the sincerity in Vision's voice makes you really believe him. "Wanda's doing this, she didn't want you to remember."

You gasp as another memory floods your mind. You had agreed to go on a road trip with Wanda after being resurrected from Bruce's snap and defeating Thanos. You both wanted a break, or so you thought.

Wanda had stopped right when you had passed the entrance into Westview, she claimed to be checking her directions when you asked why she had stopped in the middle of nowhere. And no matter how weird it was that she chose to stop at the border to the town and not at a gas station, you believed your best friend and sister in law because she had no reason to lie to you.

A moment later her eyes and hands were glowing red as she touched your temple. She pushed all your memories behind a wall in your brain, then filled your head with memories of a happy life with her and Vision in Westview.

She did it again when 'Pietro' showed up on your guy’s doorstep, this time filling your head with memories of him. Memories of a different first kiss, but an eerily similar first date to the one you and your Pietro had. It makes sense to you now, you and Pietro had never told Wanda the real story of your first kiss, instead telling her you had it weeks later on your first date. You had tried to keep your relationship a secret for a little because you didn't want to make it awkward for Wanda if it didn't work out.

Another thing she didn't add was your engagement and subsequent marriage to her brother. In this reality you and 'Pietro' are just dating. You have to assume that it's because it happened weeks before the battle against Ultron and she doesn't want to remember anything that close to her brother's death.

The thing about the new Pietro is that he seems to rub Wanda the wrong way, something your Pietro never did. He makes comments that you know yours would never, and Wanda always tenses up near him. This Pietro likes to show you off more than yours did, which is saying a lot because your’s used to cling to your side, praise you, and show you off in town when girls would flirt with him. Every time this Pietro kisses you it doesn’t feel right, it’s nowhere near the earth shattering kisses that you had somehow managed to remember from the deep parts of your brain. 

"My ring," you shudder in horror when you realize the diamond ring that your Pietro stole from the jeweler in Sokovia is no longer sitting delicately on your left ring finger like it was before entering Westview. You hastily search your body for your most prized possession, sighing in relief when you find it hanging from a simple silver chain around your neck.

"(Y/N)," Vision says gently, resting a hand on your shoulder, it’s one of the few times he doesn’t know what to say. 

"He's dead," you cry, knees buckling under your weight again. This time you catch yourself on the kitchen table, before sinking in the seat to your right.

"Who's dead?" Wanda appears in the doorway out of nowhere. She has an innocent, concerned expression on her face, but the tilt of her head tells you she'll come take your memories away again if you slip up in the slightest.

"Dr. Drake Ramoray on Days Of Our Lives, the soap opera I was watching this afternoon when you and the boys were out. He fell down the elevator shaft, and I'm apparently taking it harder than I thought I would. I must be pmsing or something."

"Or maybe you're pregnant," there's a red glint in her eyes that scares you to no end.

"Oh," you swallow the lump in your throat, and hold back the bile rising up your throat from anxiety. "I don't think so, I'm not ready to be a mother yet."

"It would be so fun though," 'Pietro' zooms behind your seat, leaning down to place a kiss on your cheek. "Little mini me's and you's running around the house with Billy and Tommy."

"I think two super human children are enough for the house right now," you let out an uncomfortable giggle. You and Vision side eye each other, both very aware that you'll probably be as pregnant as Wanda was a few days ago within the week.

[tooruluv]

Katsuki Bakugou x F!Reader ( part 1 )

❝ ...and then there’s you. ❞

description: you and bakugou have hated each other since childhood. through the constant bickering, fighting, and actual fist fights... you had no idea that you had been writing to him.

genre: angst, soulmate au where you have a notebook that you can write to your soulmate in

word count: 3.8k

warnings/notes: strong language, lots of angst, aged up characters, bakugou being bakugou, reader has an air manipulation quirk created as part 1 of 3 for my winner of my tooruluv2kparty contest @katsulovee​ <33

teaser | part 2

| masterlist

“ ‘cause when the sun goes down, someone’s talking back ” - talking to the moon, bruno mars

┏━━━━━⋇⋆⋆⋇❦⋇⋆⋆⋇━━━━━┓

The storm only escalated, casting the sky in deep blues and greys. Loud rain clattered against the roof of your apartment building, the ceiling of your top floor apartment being the only thing that separated you from the pour. 

The rain may be cold, but you were on fire.

You had been livid all day, positively outraged by the man who seemed to always be in your way. He was the most arrogant, most opinionated, and most… loud-mouthed person you ever met. You were screaming from the inside out, burning with rage.

Groaning, you sprawled out on your bed.

Katsuki Bakugou was the biggest fucking issue on the planet. His absurd need to be the best at everything he did, his cold demeanor and venom that spews from his mouth -- you wanted nothing more than to punch him directly in the throat. 

With a deep breath, you flipped open your Soulmate Journal. 

The world was such a strange place, full of quirks and criminals and heroes and villains. To add on top of that, when you turn thirteen a journal just… appears. And whoever is your soulmate can read everything you write. Once they read it, they can reply or talk to you that way and the ink disappears. There are plenty of rules that go along with it, like if you turn thirteen before your soulmate does, the ink is red until they receive their own journal. Or how the journal itself is indestructible. Or the biggest rule: you cannot write any given name. 

When you’re thirteen, your life is full of hope and wishful thinking. Almost everyone at that age is excited to start writing to their Person, the one who they were supposed to be created to be with. You were surprised when you opened yours to find nothing written.

You assumed that you were a bit older than your soulmate, but that was quickly shut down as you wrote in black ink. Your soulmate hadn’t written anything. 

It took two months for him to write back. Two months of your excessive writing and nearly diary-like entries. Two months of you wondering if they would ever write back. Until he did.

Today sucked.

That was all you wrote, your past two months of writing still ever present and glaring at you with smudges and hinted annoyance. The ink started to fade like Harry talking to Tom Riddle, reappearing with new handwriting.

It was scrawled across the page with terrible handwriting, very much one of a middle school boy. 

Life sucks. Deal with it.

You were now twenty two, an adult and that once hope and love has turned into pessimism and indifference. And life still sucked. 

You were pretty famous, your air manipulation quirk one that catches a lot of attention. That, alongside your rivalry with the second most famous hero Bakugou, brought an abundance of recognition. Bakugou completely steals your thunder every chance he has, stealing your light and victories. 

You hated him. With the utmost disrespect, you hated him. Since your days in the hero academy, the two of you were at each other’s throats. He would even stop in the middle of antagonizing Deku to make some horrendous comment towards you instead. 

You ended up scribbling along the Soulmate Pages, heated rage boiling with each word.

Hey Honey! I need to vent if that’s okay.

Of course.

You would not believe the shit I have to endure in real life. I wish I could describe the hatred I have for this man I work with, he’s a real piece of shit. Anyway, how was your day?

My day was about the same as yours, living with the idiots of real life. If we could write names I would because there’s this bitch I work with that I fucking hate.

Maybe we need new jobs (insert laughing face even though I’m livid right now)

Yeah. Maybe. But we’ll get through it.

It took years for your soulmate to warm up to you. The first interactions were hesitant, slow, and barely considered conversations. But now you can discuss your day as if you were texting a friend, talk about your likes and dislikes. 

He was your soulmate after all.

You learned that he was a boy and an only kid, he had a strong quirk, and that he liked ramen. He was a rule follower and his handwriting always used proper punctuation. You told him all about your life and how you wanted to travel away from everything.

You wanted to know who he was, more than anything. 

You wished you could tell him your name and quirk, where you lived and who you were. You wished he could do the same. 

You’ve tried, of course, to write out your name and location. But the second the words were written onto the page, they turned into a random assortment of letters. Gibberish. Never to be written, never to be known.

“Dude, fucking relax!” You rubbed your temple at your desk, voice spitting venom against Bakugou’s loud vocals. “Not everything is about you, just sit down and wait to be sent on a mission.”

“What did you say to me?”

Katsuki Bakugou had been going on and on about how Deku got assigned to a mission in upper Japan, sent to work with a separate force for a bit to expand his horizon. He was outraged, yelling and standing tall and broad to pretend to be bigger than he was. 

You were doing paperwork, trying to concentrate despite his yelling and complaining and bitching. You were hovering above your seat with your legs crossed, papers scattered (it was a habit of yours, to just kind of hover a couple of inches off the surface of things; air manipulation and all that). 

“I said,” You turned to look into his ablaze eyes. “Sit down and wait. Not everything is about you.”

You only threw fuel into his fire, you could hear the sparking between his fingers. You turned back to your paperwork. 

“You don’t get to tell me what to do, you’re not even in the top five heroes.” Bakugou barked in your direction. You could feel his heat as he approached your desk. “You can sit and do your own paperwork all you want! I need to be put on serious cases, just like stupid Deku is always placed on.”

“You can argue with me all you want.” You moved to continue your work, pretending to be unbothered. You could feel the anger boil in your chest. “But you still are and will always be measly little number two. Now shut the fuck up, you’re interrupting those who are actually working.”

He was going to hit you, you knew he was. You two ended up fist fighting all the time, oxygen and explosions ending in destruction. Before he could, your boss walked in with a bellowing, “Bakugou! Get over here, I have something for your loud ass!”

You decided to give him a bored middle finger as he walked away.

They say that words are the way of life. You could say an infinite amount of words and sentences in your lifespan, you could say a word and only ever say it one time. Each assortment of words are different each time, something new every day. 

You figured that’s why you hated the soulmate thing. 

Finding your soulmate should be one of chance, of pure coincidence and meeting of strangers. With the journal, you are starting something you only hope to find. You could go your whole life without finding your soulmate.

And that is terrifying.

There are horror stories of writing to an endless notebook, sad movies created where the lettering turns back to red before they’ve found each other. You wanted nothing more than to meet and just… be with the man you’ve been writing to since you were thirteen.

It seemed to be some sick joke, a tease in the palm of your hands.

When you were young, you attended UA High. It was meant to be the best school for heroes, grooming them into the best of the best. Both of your parents had been heroes themselves, your mom with a cloud quirk and your dad with wings. You took after a bit of both, no wings and no clouds but could create air currents and manipulate the air surrounding you within a certain radius. It has something to do with your breath and lungs, but you never looked too much into the actual DNA aspect. 

When you arrived in the hero program, you passed the tests with ease. You tried to focus mainly on yourself and gaining your own points, alongside a couple of students with the same idea. 

You were pissed when you were placed in 1-B instead of 1-A. It was the start of your rivalry with the explosion boy. 

Luckily, you quickly gained friends. You actually seemed to have a soft spot for Hitoshi Shinsou, and you and Itsuka Kendou seemed to be the only two with brains (this led to many conversations resulting in shit talking and giggling). So in the end, you weren’t too upset to be placed in the second best class. 

And you did get to fight with Bakugou a lot more without punishment, your professor wanting to be number one as much as anyone else. 

One particular day that you remember to this day, one that really labeled your hatred for Bakuogu, was just a normal day at first. You were finished with your normal morning classes and just beginning the hero portion of the day, the training and fighting. 

Your class was working with Class 1-A for the day, teaming up with one of their students and seeing how your quirks would act both against and with each other.

You were, of course, teamed with Bakugou.

The fucker was already set in his ways, loud and in need of attention at all times. You were well aware of his… loud personality… at that point, being beside Shinsou when he called your class “extras”. He was already someone you wanted nothing to do with. 

“Good luck.” Kendou muttered to you when your names were announced as partners. “See ya.”

The second you headed to him, you could feel his apprehension. He wanted nothing to do with you. And you wanted nothing to do with him. In fact, you were hoping for Uraraka as your partner, wanting to see how your air manipulation would work with her gravity. 

Apparently the professors wanted to see the oxygen working with the burst of flames. Which, honestly, is cool yes — but it was the person behind the explosions that you did not want to be a part of.

Bakugou was not one to mumble under his breath. 

“Why am I paired with you?” He rolled his eyes, crossing his arms across his chest. “I could at least be with someone interesting like Mind Control over there.”

You already wanted to punch him. “You’ve obviously never seen my quirk.”

“Clearly it hasn’t been interesting enough to be worth my attention.”

“Say that again when I remove the oxygen straight from your lungs.” You threatened, knowing damn well you didn’t know how to do that yet. “Let’s just get this over with.”

He let out a long exhale, moving into position. You were already flying by the time he let off his first explosion.

His utter disrespect for you and your quirk not only irritated you, but only was the start of a long term competition on Who Can Be Better Than Who that lasted the rest of your time at UA.

Through the constant loud arguments, the yelling in the cafeteria and the comments just loud enough for the other to hear, the fist fights and the swearing that was reserved only for each other, you found comfort in talking to your soulmate. It was relaxing after a long day of pure annoyance and shit talking to finally just get to have normal conversations with someone you enjoy. 

Are we allowed to ask about school in this thing?

I don’t think so.

I’m sighing. Pretend that you could hear my sigh.

Wow, that was a loud sigh.

YOU’RE FUNNY! Anyway, I really want to know if we go to school together :(((

I don’t even think we can talk about JRTPD or BO::SOMD. See, they turn into gibberish.

 I mean… we can say school. So we can ask ABOUT school just not… specific schools. 

That’s true. I go to a special school and am the best in my class. You’re getting lucky by having me as a soulmate.

Well I would only hope so. Need a smart soulmate for fun facts.

Fun fact: you’re pretty cool. I guess.

Ah, the admission of your love for me.

Not love. I don’t hate talking to you if that does anything for you.

The one person you don’t hate. I’ll take it, Soulmate.

Don’t push it.

We should give each other nicknames. Since we can’t call each other by our real names.

Does the book allow it?

My parents did it before they found each other.

Okay. Like what?

I can call you Hot Head, because you’re hot and because you are always writing about how mad you are.

No.

I can always go with something cute like Honey.

This is gross. I was thinking like gamer tag nicknames.

Okay, Honey.

I take back what I said, asshole.

Honey and Asshole. The perfect pair. We could solve crimes!

I’m going to bed now.

Goodnight Honey ♡ I know that you aren’t reading these but you will in the morning. Dork.

“Do you know who your soulmate is?” You asked.

You were hanging out with Kendou, Monoma, and Shinsou in Kendou’s bedroom. The dorm rooms were all set up the exact same way, but for some reason Kendou’s always seemed to be bigger. 

“No idea.” Monoma shrugged. “I don’t think I want to know until I’m older, we’re too young and I want to focus on graduating first.”

“He’s right.” Kendou twisted in her position on her bed. “Why? Do you want to know who yours is?”

“I want to know more than anything.” You sighed. Your head was laid across Shinsou’s lap on the floor. “We get along so well and I try to talk to him every day.”

“How do you know it’s a he?”

“He told me.” You laughed. “We tried really hard to narrow it down as much as possible.”

“It sounds like he wants to know you too.” Kendou said. She giggled. “I should ask my soulmate their gender.”

“What about you, Shinsou?”

“I barely write to mine.” He shrugged, making your head tilt a little. “I’m sure they understand.”

“I’m sure they do, they were made to be yours.” You looked up at him with a smile. “Of everyone, I thought you would write the most.”

“And why’s that?”

“Because most people are scared to talk to you in real life.”

He flicked your forehead. “You aren’t scared to talk to me.”

“I’m not scared to talk to anyone.”

“I’ve noticed.”

You sighed and closed your Soulmate Journal, the rain now casting a dark shadow across the entirety of the sky. Your face was flushed in red, hair disheveled and you were still in your hero uniform, dirty and kind of burnt. 

Katsuki Bakugou had not only interrupted your victory, but he had claimed it as his own. His desperation to be the number one hero hadn’t stopped. It’s been years, you’ve grown past his stupid desire and he simply… hasn’t.

You fought the villain yourself, using your quirk to it’s full capabilities and trapping them in a circle of air. You fought for over an hour by yourself, taking up the mission while out and witnessing it first hand. Your freshly bought coffee was long forgotten as you raced after the thief.

The second you landed the thief, the ball of air dissipating as you grew tired, Bakugou arrived in a fiery feat and handcuffed the villain. Of course, the main photos were of him with the handcuffs, standing proud as if he hadn’t stolen your fight. 

His argument was that he did help. Yeah, he did ‒ for three seconds.

Katsuki Bakugou was a piss stain upon himself, truly the worst of the worst who’s own personal interest outweighs anything else in his life. He will never be anything but second best because he never thinks of anyone but himself. 

If only he could read thoughts instead of turning his sweat to ignition. Then you wouldn’t have to put your harsh thoughts into tone.

Your Soulmate was one of two people you genuinely enjoyed talking to, he always seemed to be on the same page as you. The other is Shinsou, from your high school. He was the only one you really kept in contact with.

Sometimes you like to convince yourself that Shinsou is your soulmate, since he hasn’t found his either. But you compared the handwriting and it didn’t match at all. Shinsou’s handwriting was much smaller and neater than the man you would eventually call yours.

“This is so fucking stupid!” You screamed, your rage reaching its max.

You threw your journal across your bedroom, the storm masking the sound of it banging against the wall by your bed. You were pissed, you wanted nothing more than to see Bakugou’s downfall. It’s been years. You were over it.

You were over it all. You were over him, you were over not knowing your soulmate, you were over being alone in your stupid apartment. It all reached it’s apex. Maybe you needed a shower, or maybe you needed to move from your job.

Your fit was interrupted by a loud crash on the roof of your apartment building. You nearly jumped at the sound, the sound not even close to the crashes of thunder. 

You rushed to the roof, your hero senses kicking in more than your regular carefulness. Once you were outside, you were almost instantly drenched in the rain. Only a couple of yards ahead of you was a man crumbled to the ground; they must’ve hit the roof harder than you thought.

When they turned, clutching their side, you knew instantly who it was.

“Deku?” You rushed towards him. “I thought you were in Hirosaki for some serious villain.”

He moved to stand, much taller and broad than he was back in high school. Yet still with the fluffy green hair and bright eyes with hope always seemingly sewed in. 

“I was. I just… I need your help.”

“Why do you need my help?” You helped him stand fully, taking his hand from his side to check for an injury. He wasn’t bleeding. “Doesn’t Uraraka live around here?”

“I don’t… want to involve her in this.” He stood straight. His healing must’ve started. “I… this is something I need you for.”

“Okay…” You crossed your arms. “What do you need?”

“I know what you’re going to say.” Deku started, and you didn’t move. “But it’s Bakugou.”

“No.”

“C’mon, Aero, I know that you two…”

“No.”

“Please, I…”

“Deku, you know more than anyone how and who he is. Whatever it is, he can deal with it himself.” You started back towards the stairs. “I appreciate you coming to me, for whatever reason, but this is something that you have to find someone else for.”

“Don’t think of this as us doing something for him.” Deku rushed to stand in front of you. “Think of it as a favor for me. You owe me one.”

“Don’t do this now.” 

“I’m officially cashing in my favor.”

You sighed, “Fine. Can you at least tell me what we need to do for the asshole?”

“I’ll tell you on the way.” He nearly jumped in joy. “But you cannot tell anyone. Not Shinsou, not the police, and not our boss. This is under the radar.”

“Oh, shit.” You followed him as you flew next to him. “What are you getting me into?”

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