#supernatural could’ve been like 11 seasons shorter if they all stopped doing this

[crazygingerwitch]

The Curse of Magic Pt.1

Rating:PG-13 Language, Abuse, Inappropriate Relationships, Mentions of Death, Goriness

Word Count: 2,733

Pairings: None, just good old family bonding time.

Hello everyone! This is my first fic ever, so I hope you all enjoy it. This is supernatural themed, but there will be no pairings. It is set in season 11 between episodes 7 and 8. There should be at least three other parts to this. Feel free to like, comment, and re-blog everywhere!

-----------------------------------Third Person POV------------------------------------------

Boring.

That was the one word that could be used to describe the bunker lately. Ever since the case with Sheriff Donna, there had been absolutely nothing to do. All the cases Sam had found had been a few days away, and some other hunter was always closer than them, which of course meant more people saved, but it did not help with the cabin fever of Team Free Will. And there was still no headway on the Darkness, except for Sam’s ever increasing dreams. They had been like this for a week, until Sam came bounding into the kitchen.

“Hey Dean, so get this. In Sturgis, South Dakota there has been a few grizzly homicides, no broken entries, no suspects, and they are all young single men in their early twenties. Sounds like a case to me. Maybe a vengeful spirit, witch, or demon. What do you think?”

“I don’t care.” said Dean, with a  mouth full of bacon “It sounds like a case so I’m gonna take it.”

Sam shook his head, an amused grin on his face, “When should we head out?”

Dean jumped up, “Right effing now.”, he said, striding out of the room. Sam counted to five in his head before Dean came bounding back in “Almost forgot my bacon.” Dean shoved the rest in his mouth and grumbled out “Now we can go.”

The boys rolled into town around mid-afternoon, Dean’s eagerness for a case getting them there in a record eight hours. They walk into the Sheriff's office with their FBI suits. It takes a little extra persuading to let them look at the case files and bodies, but they get around to it. Each of the young men had their chests ripped open, and their hearts literally torn in half while it was still pumping.

“You mean that these kids were still alive when this happened?” Dean inquired.

The coroner nodded in agreement. “Whoever did this, really wanted them to hurt before dying. We found a lot less blood than normal outside of the actual bodies, implying that the killer kept the wounds closed up enough for them to keep living and hurting. These boys were awful, but no one deserves that much pain.”

“Awful?” Sam asked, “From what the police have told us, these boys have no known enemies.”

The coroner sighed, his shoulders showing the weight he carried. “Listen, this breaches my code of confidentiality, but with these guys dead, I think the rules need to be bent. With a town this size, it’s rather obvious that coroner is not my full time job. I also double as the high school counselor. I have had at least six girls this quarter come in and confide in me about their ‘secret relationships’. They would tell me about how they were in love with this older boy that their parents wouldn’t approve of, but in their words, these boys were sweet and made them feel special. As far as I could tell these boys weren’t hurting them, and they weren’t having sex, so nothing illegal was happening.”

Sam narrowed his eyes, “You said that they weren’t having sex or hurting them. Did that change?”

The coroner slumped in a nearby chair defeated. “These girls wouldn’t tell me anything. Eventually, they would come in with tears in their eyes, saying that these men broke their hearts. A few of these girls even said that they had given everything to them. When I asked them to elaborate, they would clam up and say some cheesy crap about how they had given their heart completely. A few of them spiraled down a dark path. One of them hung herself three weeks ago. Seeing her on my table was the worst thing I had to do in this job. Now, I’m not saying that these girls did this crime, nor that these boys deserved it, but I am looking forward to the day when the other two boys are put behind bars, or at the least,” he concluded, with a glare to the medical table, “on my table.”

Sam nodded, “I understand that these boys deserve some level of pain, but personally, I would rather have the suffer for years in jail, than for a few hours by a psychopath. I understand if you can’t give us the names of these girls, but if you could tell us who these other boys are, we could connect the dots, and stop anyone from ending up on your table again.”

The coroner rubbed, his eyes, and nodded reluctantly “I’ll give you all of their names so you can stop this as soon as possible. Just give me a moment.”

Fifteen minutes later, the brothers walked out of the coroner’s office with a full page of names. “Sammy, this case is literally in the bottom ten for  most depressing. Although I have to wonder, why did you want that list? Isn’t it kind of obvious that the suicide girl is the one causing all of this? Her death works with the time frame.”

Sam rubbed his forehead, “I know. But if it isn’t her, then we at least have a list now so we can work ahead of the curve. What’s our next step? Do you think we should head up to the high school, interview some of the students?”

Before Dean could reply, someone tapped him on the shoulder. He whirled around and came chest-to-face with a 20-something year old woman, with big, curly red hair and eyes that were so blue they looked almost purple. She was dressed in a button down flannel, a smart grey jacket, and black skinny jeans. Her ears, neck and wrists were adorned with different kinds of charms. “I’m sorry to bother you, but I heard you were heading up to the high school, and my car broke down. I need to be there in the next fifteen minutes, or my sister will be kicked out of volleyball.”

Dean looked at her like she was crazy. “Do we know you?”

The lady shook her head. “No, but I heard there was FBI in town, and you guys look it. Besides, I know plenty of self defense, so I can handle myself. So please may I have a ride?”

Dean and Sam looked at each other, communicating through facial expressions before Dean turned back to her, and agreed. “Thanks!” She cried. Dean gestured toward the backseat, and she hopped in.

While the Impala roared down the roads, they had some idle chit chat. The boys figured they might as well get some info about what was going on at that high school.

“So I suppose you boys are in town about the heart breaker?” After the blank looks, the young woman said “The serial killer? The one who tore those boys’ hearts in half?”

“How did you hear about that?” Sam inquired. “From what we understand, the police are trying to keep the investigation as private as possible.”

She rolled her eyes, “Three gory murders in a town like this? Word gets around pretty fast Agent Smith.”

Dean glanced at her “When did we tell you our names again?”

“When I first got in the car amnesia man. And I take it you forgot my name as well?”

“Maybe.” Dean mumbled.

“Well it’s Minerva Heflin. But you can call me Minnie. Everybody does. How in the world did you forget my name so quickly?”

“Forgive my partner, MInnie,” Sam interrupted, “He’s a dunderhead. I was wondering, with your sister in the high school, could you tell us a bit more about the recent suicide. We think that someone is out looking for someone to blame, and is taking it out on these young men.”

Minnie shrugged, “My sister is seventeen years old. She doesn’t tell me much of anything. But you can ask her in a few seconds.”

“A few seconds? We’re at least a few min.......” Dean trailed off. There on their left was the high school. “Wow. I must have been going faster than I thought.”

Minnie hopped out of the car. “Just a minute gentleman. I’ll get my sister, and if she agrees, you can question her while you give us a ride back to my home.” She walked off in search of her sister.

Sam looked at Dean, “Think it’s worth it? Or is this just some dead end?”

Dean shrugged, “We can maybe learn something, and besides, might as well help these damsels in distress. Here they come now.”

It wasn’t hard to spot Minnie, with her fireball of hair. Next to her was a petite, tan brunette, about half an inch shorter than Minnie. They looked nothing alike at first glance, but taking a closer look, you could see the same facial structure, the shared crooked smiles and tiny dimples. And just like Sam and Dean, they had an undeniable bond between them that everyone could see.

“Hello Agents. This is my sister, Diane. She agreed to ask some questions as long as you don’t tell anyone else in town.”

“Hello.” the younger girl said, quiet where her sister was loud.

“Hop in the back ladies, and we’ll take you home.” Dean said, gesturing to the backseat.

Once Minnie gave some initial instructions, Sam started the questions. “So Diane, could you tell us a little bit about Taylor, the girl who hung herself?”

Diane thought, “We share an AP Lit class, and a lunch period, but we barely talked. She was a cheerleader, and she had some friends, but the few weeks before she died, everyone could tell she was changing. She started to sit alone, our teacher had to take her outside of class for mouthing off, and she quit the squad.”, she sighed obviously saddened, “A few days before she died, I walked on on her cutting herself and crying in the bathroom. She begged me not to tell anyone, and I agreed. She said that she was getting better and that she was talking to people about it. I guess I was wrong. When I heard the news, I wished there was something I could’ve done, but I don’t have any magic powers to make everything better. I’m just glad that those stupid jerks are getting what they deserve.” Venom began to fill the young girl’s voice.

“Those boys are bastard heart-breakers, and I think they have earned every punishment they have received. I just hope the other two suffer just as much.”

“Diane!” snapped Minerva, “You take that back right now.”

“No!” cried Diane, “Those boys hurt at least half of the senior girls, and I know for a fact that Taylor wasn’t the only one to start cutting because of their cruelty. I’m just glad justice is finally being served.”

Sam cleared his throat, “You do realize that you’re not helping yourself here? I don’t think you committed these murders, but other people will think differently. So please, can you tell us if anyone at the school would have acted on Taylor’s suicide? It would really help the investigation.”

Diane huffed, “Fine. I don’t think any of the people at school would have done anything like this, but I know that everyone single one of the girls at school are happy that this is happening. They deserve it after what they did to me!”

Diane stopped short as if realizing what she just said. “I don’t mean me, I mean, uh,..Well look at that we’re home. Have a nice day agents!” With that, she ran out of the car and into the run down apartment building.

Minerva was still in the car shell-shocked. “My sister...she was hurt by those bastards?” She started to shake, and hurriedly unbuckled, “I’m sorry gentlemen, but if you wish to speak with us again, you’ll need a warrant. Good luck with your investigation.” She left quickly, her hair bouncing as she ran after her distressed sister.

After much deliberation, the brothers decided to salt and burn Taylor’s body. If the information from Diane was correct, nobody from the school would actually have the guts to do these grizzly murders. The next day, they learned that they had gotten muddy for nothing. One of the last two boys had gotten the same treatment as the others.

“I just don’t know man”, said Dean, “I really don’t think any of the girls would have the guts or means to do this. And if they did, it probably wasn’t a demon or witch, since they don’t think they exist.”

Sam rubbed his eyes, “I know that these guys are jerks, but the police aren’t going to catch the killer, even if they are human. I think our best bet is to check out this Diane person. She wasn’t on the coroner’s list, and she said that at least half the girls in the senior class were hurt by these boys. I think we should check her apartment for any demon or witch activity, and see if we can’t find out more about these girls.”

And so they did. That night, the brothers sneaked into the apartment after the lights were out, around 2 AM. It was going pretty well, until Dean walked into the kitchen and stumbled into a kid.

The little girl was looked to be about ten years old, with dirty blonde hair, sky blue eyes, and a chubby face. There were a few seconds of silence before she opened her mouth and screamed louder than a siren.

A loud crash was heard in a couple of places, which was soon accompanied by Minerva and Diane running through one door, and Sam by the other. When their siblings appeared, they both retreated to their respective family.

Minnie stepped in front of the two younger girls protectively, “Listen, I swear we don’t have anything valuable here. Just leave before we call the real police okay?”

“Shut up witch!” cried Sam, “I saw your supplies in the living room, don’t pretend.”

Minnie straightened, obviously startled. “Gosh, I knew you weren’t real FBI, but hunters!”, she shook her head, “This is bad. My warning stays the same, leave before I charge you with breaking and entering.”

“Yeah right”, said Dean. “We’ve dealt with too many witches to leave you alone. Now if you burn all your supplies and turn yourself in, we’ll leave your sisters alone.”

“No!” cried the little blonde. She began to run straight at Dean, fists raised in anger. “Leave my sister alone! She’s a nice witch!”

“Sammy, NO!” Minnie threw her hands forward, sending Sam and Dean crashing against the wall, breaking a few chairs on the way. She grabbed her little sister and handed her to Diane. “Leave my sisters alone! I don’t know what you think I did, but I only use my magic for protection. I swear. Please just leave us alone.”

Tears were streaming down the blonde’s face. “You are mean, mean men. Leave us alone. She’s a nice witch!”

Sam stood up on shaky legs. Something about these girls made him think of his brother, and he knew that Minerva would do anything to protect her sisters. It would be best to act nice for now. “We won’t turn you in okay. I believe you, but that doesn’t mean we trust you.”

“Sam!” snapped Dean, “What the hell? She’s a witch. The less of them on this planet, the better.”

“Shut up Dean.” hissed Sam. “Listen lady, how about we put our weapons down, and you can tell us what’s going on here, okay?”

Minnie slowly lowered her hands. “Fine, but Diane gets one of your guns, and Sammy goes upstairs. Okay?”

Dean looked puzzled “Why in the world would my brother go upstairs?”

Diane rolled her eyes, “Our sister dummkopf. Her name is Samantha, but we call her Sammy.”

Samantha added, “And I don’t like it”

Sam snorted, “That makes two of us kid. And we accept you deal.”

After exchanging guns and dragging the little girl to bed, it was time to get down to business. They all stood there, waiting for the other to do something first, the silence thickening like a dense fog.

Finally Minerva broke the silence, “So, are we gonna get this party started or what? Have a seat boys.” With a wave of her hand, the chairs that broke on the Winchester’s landing repaired themselves. “We have a long night ahead of us.”

Continued in Part 2. Don’t forget to re-blog and like!

P.S. Dummkopf means stupid-head in German.

[mittensmorgul]

Between the promo and the interview with Dabb. It's important to see the love professed between persons they are not blood family but they are Family. I will only say that love is different but not least. I love that Dean says "Cas is my best friend" because a friend can be a brother, confidant, ally, encompasses a lot of things. And I Iike Dabb to say "Everybody looking for their place" Because they are all important. Castiel is one of a kind and he has to find his own place in the universe.

Yeah.

(And just for the record, Mr. Mittens is my best friend.)

(we’ve been married for almost 20 years)

(but he’s definitely my best friend)

And really, the whole “Everybody looking for their place” thing is something we’ve been flailing over FOR YEARS. ACTUAL MULTIPLE YEARS.

*note to say that I would provide ALL the quotes, but the superwiki’s been down all day, so this is literally entirely off the top of my head. All receipts can be found buried in my blog, but for the purposes of answering this in a timely fashion, *boom* you get the stuff I can remember without looking it up… :D*

*second note to say I’m putting this under a cut because damn… I wrote over 3k on the subject and whoa it’s long*

Let’s start with Dean (because really this show, for me, starts and ends with Dean)

Dean, in 10.16, with his whole confessional scene. Thinking about the things… people he wants to experience differently. Maybe even for the first time.

But this isn’t even really a new notion for Dean. At the beginning of the series we were first introduced to this cocky dude who had this whole loner/rebel thing going on… but that image got turned on its head by the end of the second episode (the third episode drowned that perception of Dean in a lake). He spent most of s2 feeling like he wasn’t even supposed to be ALIVE, let alone deserve anything more than he already had.

By s3, he’d sold his soul for Sam’s, and he was content with the trade… until near the end of the season when his time was running out and he was forced to confront his fate… (I don’t deserve it! FINALLY! at the end of 3.10 confronting the dream-demon-dean)

Resurrected in 4.01, Cas points out that Dean doesn’t believe he deserved to be saved… and he’s forced to confront this fate apparently laid on him by God– who he didn’t even believe existed, and certainly didn’t care about. Heaven was conspiring against Dean to make him into their pawn, all the while he fought against that fate. At that point in the story, back during the Apocalypse, he didn’t really get much time to stop and think about what “place” he’d choose for himself, he just knew he wasn’t gonna let destiny choose for him. Back then, he was fighting for the right to choose at all.

Apocalypse dusted, he trudged off to look for a white picket fence and a little peace and quiet. As far as he knew, the world wasn’t trying to end anymore, and without any sort of direction for himself, for the first time in his life he was sort of free to explore something different for himself. For reasons I’ve talked about plenty of times before, it didn’t work out for him. He tried to find a balance there, but it was too much, and suddenly he was adrift again.

He’d lost his faith again. Cas was gone, Sam was broken, and the world was definitely falling apart again. S7 stripped away everything that Dean had ever known. Forget about having choices, by the end of the season he was even running out of last-ditch refuges. Then he and Cas ended up in the last-ditch refuge to beat all other last-ditch refuges: Purgatory.

Coming back from Purgatory seemed to give Dean a new lease on life. ESPECIALLY after Cas came back… at least for a little while. Even after Cas came back to him, he still ditched him again…

(yes it was because he was being controlled by Naomi, no neither dean nor cas knew that at the time, yes it left everyone feeling terrible)

Then they discovered the Bunker. Things really began to change for him. He had a place that he felt was actually THEIRS. A solid, steady home base that grounded him in the world like nothing had since he’d been 4 years old and had a family home. It was his heritage, a part of his personal history that had been stolen from him long before he was even born. And that was HUGE for Dean.

The thing he was best at, the thing he took most pride in– his abilities as a hunter– was validated by this creepy old vault in a hillside.

Suddenly he had a home, a sense of legitimacy, a sense that he wasn’t some outcast on the fringes of society. Granted, living in a secret underground bunker still technically puts one on the fringes of society, but more in a Batman sort of way instead of in a Spiders Georg sort of way…

Right from the start, Dean had this sense of BELONGING there. He felt at home. He LIKES living there. He has privacy and comfort and his own room and a cozy robe and slippers, not to mention all the tools and resources he could ever hope to have to do the job he’s always loved (well, for the most part he’s loved it…).

But there’s always been that responsibility his father instilled in him from the moment he told him to carry Sam outside as fast as he can. His one real job, even above the hunting, has been to watch out for Sam. He still feels responsible for Sam, even though they’re both in their 30′s (and Dean’s pushing 40 now…). Is that REALLY his primary responsibility in life? I mean, of course he loves his brother, but should he forever put Sam’s needs and wishes BEFORE his own? Or, conversely, override Sam’s own wishes in service to that old “watch out for Sammy, you have to save him” mantra that John burdened him with in 2.01? That’s something he’s beginning to learn, beginning back in s11, and continuing into s12.

I think Dean realizes that hunting is where he belongs. Going back to 11.04, Sam asking him if he ever thought about settling down with someone in the life. Like, finding a romantic partner to share the life with. I.e., hunting with someone other than Sam. Implying that SAM had thought about this, too, for himself.

Conveniently, Sam meets a really lovely female hunter who he has a lot of instant chemistry with just seven episodes later (hello, Eileen!). But at the time in 11.04, Dean denies having considered it a real possibility for him. Despite having said something along those exact same lines in 10.16.

How much have I written about 11.11 and Dean’s heart-to-heart with Mildred about sunsets, and pining for someone, and… right. Okay. (there’s nearly 200 posts in that episode tag fyi. I’m not even gonna CONSIDER diving in there to pull references, or I’ll be there all night :P).

In 11.17 he gets the lesson hammered home that he can’t just throw away his own life in exchange for Sam’s. For the first time in his life, he’s confronted with the absolute fact that Sam’s life is not cosmically more important than his own. He doesn’t want Sam to suffer or die or to have to carry undue burdens on his soul (like the Mark of Cain… >.>), but that’s a reasonable thing to feel. It’s NOT reasonable to try to spend the rest of his life standing as that human shield between Sam and the rest of the world either, though, and he’s finally starting to understand that.

Then in 11.19 Dean makes a real breakthrough and FINALLY admits out loud and in front of Sam that he’s curious about what it’s like settling down with another hunter. He asks this of two men who are married to each other. Again, in front of Sam.

The s11 finale was ALL ABOUT CHUCK AND AMARA FINDING THEIR PLACE in a strange way. Not Chuck hiding out on Earth pretending to be something he’s not (a Dean mirror…), not Amara locked away somewhere like a prisoner, nor destroying all of creation in retaliation. It was all about balance, brought about by Dean Winchester.

So, that leaves us in Dean’s current situation. Mary’s suddenly alive again after all these years, Sam’s been hurt and taken by ??? and Cas was true to his word and stuck around.

Not only that, but Cas seems just as fierce and determined as Dean to get Sam back. Aah, brotherly feelings! Because THAT’S how Cas has learned (from Dean) that you take care of your brother. And really, I think that’s how Cas does see Sam. As a brother. It’s been a long time since he’s referred to Sam as the Boy with the Demon Blood, or “an abomination.” And Cas’s journey since borrowing Jimmy’s body and popping into that barn to say hi to Dean has also been about his friendship (and kinship) with Sam.

(I mean, just look at 9.11, THEY BOND OVER HOW SIMILAR THEY ARE! THEY TALK ABOUT HOW BOTH ANGELS AND WINCHESTERS CAN GROW AND CHANGE!)

I know this has largely been about Dean to this point, but when I started writing, I had no idea how much I really had to say on the subject. I was going to do a similar “this is your life” sort of segment for Sam, but It’s almost impossible to talk about Dean without pulling in relevant tidbits about Sam. So I’m gonna spend a (hopefully!) shorter amount of time talking about Sam here, specifically.

When Sam first met Cas, he was in awe of angels. Unlike Dean, he’d always had faith in a higher power. (He’d also always had Dean as a human shield against some of the worst of their young lives, which probably contributed to his ability to maintain that faith in what otherwise could’ve been a completely faith-destroying life… I mean, see Dean himself for the obvious compare/contrast here).

Sam had always felt “other.” The freak. Not even really all human. Living on the fringes of society yet wanting desperately to fit in and just be normal. He hated his life, hated hunting, hated not being normal. And then his powers kicked online and amped that feeling up to 11.

Poor Sam has spent so much of the series being the object of the supernatural that the only times he ever even tried to run away from the life he just got pulled right back in. He tried to run once during the Apocalypse, but that didn’t even last more than a few days before he was forced back in (in 5.03/5.04). The closest he got to escaping into normalcy was during early s8 while Dean was in Purgatory.

Nothing says family like the whole family being dead.

He drifted around the country aimlessly until he hit a dog.

He seemed to settle in for a brief time, but then suddenly Dean was back, reminding him that he had a duty to protect Kevin, and he’d failed. He’d never told Amelia ANYTHING about his life before he’d met her. Well, nothing REAL, anyway. Not the truth. Nothing about hunting or monsters or anything. So when his history finally caught up with him, his choice was an either/or. He couldn’t have both (not even like Dean had tried to do with Lisa, since she did know the truth about him. Sam wouldn’t burden Amelia with it, despite having demanded as his dying wish that Dean burden Lisa with it all…)

So Sam was adrift again, even though he had Dean by his side. Even though he had the bunker as a home base. It WASN’T a proper home by his standards. It wasn’t enough.

Enter the trials, enter Gadreel, enter the fight against the Mark, enter the Darkness… and finally Enter God.

(also enter Dean spending a month or so pining away and driving himself bonkers trying to save Cas from Lucifer)

And then… God couldn’t just snap his fingers and make this better. In fact, God was kind of a jerk. Or, at least, God was really freaking limited in his own ability to change. That’s one of the drawbacks of being absolute.

Free will is not included in the kit.

But Sam? Sam’s got it. And he chooses to exercise it LIKE A BOSS. SAM FUCKING WINCHESTER. CAN I GET AN AMEN!

Sam’s chosen all through s12 to stand up and defend what he believes in. Even in 12.01/12.02 when he felt like he had really nothing left to lose (with Dean gone, Cas banished, the Darkness vanquished), he still didn’t give in to his captors. He kept fighting for himself.

Because he does see the bunker as his home now. He’s also got this weird second chance to get to know his mother in a blank slate sort of way. He’s accepted her terms for how their relationship will proceed, because getting to know her AT ALL had never even been a possibility for him.

And we know he’s spent some time thinking about his future (his little retirement brochure and his box of memories). He’s spent time wondering what it might be like settling down with a hunter. He’s begun archiving the MoL records to make them accessible. He’s got a way to keep one foot in hunting and still have a relatively settled life. And he finally got Lucifer locked back up in the cage. He’s got hope for the future.

(well, he did until they got arrested by the secret service and tossed into some sort of black site)

Now on to Cas.

Castiel, Angel of the Lord. Arguably the most fascinating character progression in the history of television. He began as a completely alien being who was just rebellious enough and empathetic enough and curious enough to be swayed by humanity. Yes, he had a history of defying orders going back millennia, but he’s also been labeled as having “too much heart.” What a wonderful problem for an angel to have.

From wrathful soldier of heaven to homeless human struggling to survive, he’s experienced so much. And he’s been open to every last experience. He’s let humanity touch him and change him, all the while fighting to do the right thing for Heaven and Earth. He’s made some catastrophic mistakes along the way, and the weight of that guilt has affected him even more.

I saw a post earlier today about the line from the See Evil promo, where Dean says Cas is his best friend. Below that is an image of the “Friends to Lovers” tag from AO3. Because yeah, I mean, isn’t that the next logical step here? Their entire story has been a Strangers to Associates to Enemies to Associates to Friends to Associates to Enemies to Associates to Friends to whateverthefuck they were in Purgatory to Friends to Close Really Close Friends to Awkwardly Asking Out And Getting Rejected But Staying Heartbroken Friends to Bitter Exes to Friends to Brothers to “everyone you love will be long dead except for me” to ~Brothers~ to Old Married People Having A Spat Over How Much Cas Travels For Work With Dean’s Ex.

It’s ridiculous.

*glances up at this ridiculous post trying to determine if I’ve addressed your question even a little bit and realizes this is gonna have to go under a cut. WTF, self?*

Cas’s ENTIRE HISTORY ON THE SERIES, ALL OF IT, HAS BEEN A JOURNEY OF “FINDING HIS PLACE.”

I just watched 4.20 yesterday. That’s where I am in my current rewatch. He’s been struggling with what’s right, with what he should do, with where he should entrust his loyalty. Heaven’s orders don’t feel right. There’s something fishy going on up there, and his loyalty was wavering. After getting pulled back to Boot Camp for reprogramming, he tells Dean that he serves Heaven, not humanity, and CERTAINLY not Dean…

Well, it only takes him two more episodes to turn that around and tear up the script. For Dean.

THIS HAS ALWAYS BEEN CAS’S JOURNEY.

As much as Sam has been manipulated by the universe, Cas has too. (remember what I said about Sam and Cas in 9.11? Yeah, that.)

Well as much as Sam and Cas have in common, the relationship between Cas and Dean has NEVER looked like that. There’s always been a distinct difference between how Cas and Sam relate to one another, and how Cas and Dean relate to one another.

But Dean being Dean, who doesn’t feel like he deserved to be saved, doesn’t have any clue what to do with an Angel of the Lord who put his faith in Dean. And Cas doesn’t have any clue what to do with this man who has called him brother and best friend, both of which taste a little bit like a lie, or at least not entirely like the truth.

(see previous comment about Old Married Couple, yet with neither of them realizing it)

I realized a few minutes ago that I’ve already written something about Cas’s entire journey (as it stood over the summer hiatus after s11), and how he’s always been headed toward this huge choice: Do you want to live as an angel, or as a man? I’d go digging for it, but *scrolls up through this entirely too long already post* I think I’ve spent enough time on this.

Cas has struggled with these HUGE questions. He’s tried to do what was right. He’s tried to reconcile his duty to heaven with the original mission God set for the angels to protect humanity. He’s met God himself and seen the entire story of creation resolve itself. And now? Now where does he belong? His story’s been paralleled to Mary’s this season. Mary who feels out of place and time and disconnected from the world, yet is tied to it by blood and family and humanity. Cas feels out of place because of WHAT he is, because he’s not human or blood (even if he is family… or whatever he reads into Dean’s assertions that he has a place with them, in their home, with the Winchesters).

It’s all about family, what makes family, and finding out how they all fit into each others’ lives. If given the choice, what would each of them decide to do?

TL/DR? Basically my point is this is nothing new. This has always been the story, no matter what the “bigger problems” they’ve faced over the years have been. It’s just become a much more tangible and dynamic part of the story in the last season or so. Meaning it’s become more important, if anything. For Dean, for Sam, and for Cas.

Take any of those three out of the story, and the whole structure collapses. They’re all equally important here. I don’t think anyone who says different has a leg to stand on. I don’t know what the fuck show they’re watching, but it’s definitely not Supernatural.

Not sure if I even really addressed the original message here, but I’ve been typing this for a couple of hours now, so I guess I’ve officially typed myself out. :P