#telling me that it's extremely unlikely that anyone would wanna touch me like that

[dairy-farmer]

You know how hormonal bullshittery like pregnancy and the monthly Fuck You, make people feel really REALLY horny? Even when they basicly can't act on it or are feeling gross?

......wanna bet that's what being a Beta is like?

Cause they ARE the same species. Why would THEY get to dodge the heats/rutts bullet entirely? They get clipped! They still have to suffer! Hell, I bet they still have the same organs regardless!

That Beta male can ABSOLUTELY give you a child.

It's just incredibly, INCREDIBLY unlikely. THE textbook definition of a high risk pregnancy. Oh, and incredibly tough on their body. Cause the organ is basicly vestigial. It WORKS but for fucks sake! If you're advising a Beta couple, just tell them to use the far more effective SECONDARY in the biologically female beta! Assuming there is one! Are you TRYING to people in the hospital?!

But of course, just cause it isn't likely to give you a baby (unless Extreme Situations blah dee blah dee you get the picture, historical contexts), doesn't mean it doesn't fuck with your hormones. Leave you feeling gross.

Because!

Beats? Get "seasons". Short for fertile seasons. It was this whole old myth, that they were more likely to get pregnant during their "seasons". When in reality, they are basicly either pseudo-heats or pseudo-rutts, depending on which trait (while recessive) is stronger.

Tim looked it up. He had time too.

Cause he feels GROSS and horny. No one touch him or he'll stab you but also cuddle him right now or he'll cry. He hates all of you. Your his best friends and he loves you. He'd burn Gotham down for a Specific Brand of those one pickles.

He can't find the drier sheets... he's a failure and the world is ending, time to sit down and cry.

Needless to say? Thank FUCK it only happens like 3 times a year. He's already a mess, he refuses to let anyone see him like this. He doesn't CARE that "studies" and "common sense" say that pack helps manage the symptoms! He can handle it! Fuck you! He'll bite!

.........he sowwy. Are you mad?

And see, normally? His squirrelly "I gotta drop off the map, don't follow me" routine wouldn't be a problem. God knows BRUCE has let it go on for WAY too long. But? Jason? Jason is suspicious. Been trying to do better. And more importantly?

Been keeping track of days in his head.

Been about three months since you last went dark, Timbers. Suspicious number of days to go silent too. Bout the same number of days as a season. Knock the fuck knock, Timby tock! Open the fucking door. You can do it, or I will.

Tim looks like a miserable drowned Racoon.

Sweaty.

So sexy.

He has the AUDACITY to GROWL at him with his Itty bitty lil crackle beta voice. Jason informs him he's lucky "sad and pathetic" is somehow still cute on him, picks him up like a sack of cheap take-out, and drags him back to his place.

Tells him to scrub the layer of sweaty misery of himself while he gets food ready.

It's... it's nice. Tim realizes. Having this walking tank of an Alpha just sort of casually take care of him. Flop down on him like a weighted blanket. The chatter of Jason's shows in the background, the smell of his nest pressed against Tim's face, pressure against his body, warm and heavy. The feeling of Jason's hand, absent-mindedly playing with his hair, as he reads or researchs.

Tim can... drift.

They don't do anything that first time. Or the second. Or third. But the thought creeps in to Tim's head and won't leave. He bet it'd feel nice. Bet Jason would take care of him. Jason is so GOOD at take care of people. He's so tired. No one ELSE takes care of him. Even when he's so good for them. Tries his best.

.....he wants to go back and nap in Jason's nest again.

That was nice.

And? Alpha senses are sharper then a Betas. Jason NOTICES Tim starting to glance at him more and more. Linger closer and closer. Get that little mournful, hopeful, look in his eyes. Notices him start to look HAPPIER as his season gets closer, instead of annoyed. Like his looking forward to it.

Oh ho~? Jason's a lot of things, but dumb? Not one of them.

Not all of those looks were strictly platonic longing. It gave Jason some things to think about. Too consider. Does he... want too?

.....yeah. Yeah he does.

Better buy some of the Good Shit then. His lube sucks.

So Timbers comes over. Jason's done some research. What helps horny, miserable Betas. He's also a Bat. He pulls the ol "oh look, I just so happen to be freshly showed and in criminally short bathrobe. Mmmm, I sure am CLOSE, aren't i?" gambit. It's not even remotely subtle.

Tim's too busy ogling to notice or care.

Oh LOOK! Jason's sprawling like a magnificent big cat! Legs splayed and muscles loose, draped back against your side like your his personal throne! Mmm, sure is distracted by this show! And not paying attention to you! Would be a perfect time to get... ideas(tm)~

And Tim IS. Because Jason's leaning back against his torso, warm and heavy, smelling so... so NICE. And... t-thighs. Long... legs long. Strong. W.. wanna touch. Lick everything. *desperately tries not to whine in Horny*

But then? Jason does his "absent-mindedly petting Tim" thing? And his self control is fuckin DYING here, man! (Yeah, Jason's knows. It should die faster.) A-and s.. surely it's okay if... if TIM pets back right? Purely platonic! He can control himself!

......that's a fuckin lie.

He's not even sure HOW, but Jason's cock ends up in mouth. And it's like his brain cuts out, leaving him limp and full of pleasant static. Curled up, a strong hand softly playing with his hair, occasionally rubbing his cheek. As his mouth is filled, his vision filled, as all he can smell is JASON. Glide, push, glide, push. Tounge and throat and careful with his teeth.

Like meditation.

He's not even desperately trying to get him off, just wants Jason to fill his mouth. Too pay attention to him. Keep running his hands across his skin. And Jason does.

And sure, he considers pulling Timbers into his lap. Filling him properly. But the lil guy look so RELAXED for once. So blissed out. So? Sure buddy... you can have Alphas cock. Go ahead and suck. That's It. You're doing a real good job.

Course, once he figures out how to turn Tim's brain off? He has to figure out if it's a "all the time" thing or a "season" thing. You know... for excuses reasons. And? As a very stressful serial killer case soon proves? It's an all the time thing.

Drag him back to HIS safe house, patch him up, and pull him down to rest in a nice lil defensible layered nest? Right between his knees as he "keeps watch"? And Timbers can't seem to help himself. And damn if it doesn't feel fantastic, not gonna lie. No one EVER gets that... that fuckin WORSHIPFUL of Jason. It's setting off all SORTS of instincts in his head.

Gonna make that fucked up trainwreck a lasagna. Force him to take a nap.

His his his his, good boy baby, his.

Thankfully, it's not so much Tim OPPOSED as Tim, once again, single mindedly focused. So Jason just has too, with GREAT sacrifice and strength of will, NOT let Tim get his magnificent lil mouth get ahold of his cock. But gently push him back and flop down on him. Run his hands down and down until he strikes gold.

Doesn't take him long to figure out what Tim likes. What days he doesn't want to think, needs to be fucked brainless. What days he can't stand touch, needs a good thick toy and some company. The days he wants Jason's fingers. Or a bead for his clit and a nice long relaxing Zone out suck on Jason's cock.

He's Jason's needy, prissy, demanding, god awful, pillow princess of a train wreck Beta and Jason adores him. They practically live together by now. Reak of each other. You would have to be WILLFULLY BLIND to not notice.

So of course... the others notice last.

Too late! You didn't take care of him, bruce! So I DID! I fed that bitch a lasagna! AND my coc-! *Horrified Bat noises*

Tim's never been happier.

-🐼

😍😍😍😍 jason turning hissy tim into a sweet, pliant beta that would just like to fuck him while looking like the spirtual equivalent of 🥺

[vsnotresponding]

1 for Ely! And anyone else you wanna talk about!

Also 14 I know you have aroace characters, but tell me more about how they perceive their aroaceness since it’s such a wide spectrum. Any character of your choosing for this one :)

questions from this pride ask game

hi lyn!!

1. What's your oc's gender identity? What's their relationship to their gender?

Ely uses they/them pronouns, but doesn't mind being addressed by male terms (they are called Death prince, for example) (in a modern au they'd use the non binary label). Their relationship with their gender is very tricky, and is part of the plot.

Since forever they've known they aren't a girl, or a boy, and were most content when addressed with gender-neutral terms like kid or child. being perceived as female made them extremely uncomfortable, which made them avoid contact with everyone if they could. in their head, they were always just Ely (i've made a note to only address them as such until they get to the point where they master Sorrow and truly become a *them*).

thing is, after they die, they both resent and try to forget the person they were. they hate that teen. they killed her. she can't be mourned because she was never there. but that's just not true (it's also the reason there's a plot lol). she might not be them, but she's a part of who they are.

everything's very gender with them, and mostly based on my own gender fuckery :]

14. Do you have ocs on the aro or ace spectrum?

oh boi do I:

ngl, i have a feeling all my pov and mc characters will have touches of the spectrum as i write them, , because i'm aroace and i *struggle* with writing these things.

there's tho, the Canon Ace/Aro ocs my beloveds

I Will Go In Depth About All Of Them. Because I Can

Púlsar:

Karma: demiace. very bad with touching other people in any way unless he really really trusts them (there's a bit of his autism in here too). struggles with aesthetic attraction (he really doesn't notice poor man). would like to be cuddled tho. is also very clueless about his identity. he knows he hasn't liked anyone like, ever, and it takes him literal years to realize he likes ira. so. again, poor man. i love him

Níniam: very ace. again, doesn't think much about these things so he's not very aware either (talking about an older Níniam btw)

Hamza: greyace, has only been attracted to The One Dude ever. again, very chill with it.

Bean: ace, but with a powerful aesthetic attraction. women pretty. (again talking about older Bean)

Ira: ace. is able to recognize when someone is aesthetically pretty but it doesn't do much for her. she's a very touchy person, but i don't think she'd be sex favorable. leaning towards neutral-negative, ngl.

she has a complicated relationship with love. she either hates you, dislikes you (most people), tolerates you, tolerates you but will call you friend because social conventions, or loves you. that's the only distinction she makes. she's aware she loves people in different ways, but they are unique for every person she does, so there's not like, a clear difference she can explain. i don't use the aro label for her, and i don't think she would either.

UP:

Hannah: aroace. incidentally, her colors are purple and green. yeah, she finds the people that approach her annoying and has no interest in romantic or sexual relationships. they are at peace with it, ngl. also she has enough with the messes lyric gets into and with patting akira on the back when lyric keeps not realizing his best friend is in love with him (she's very tired of the allos).

CV:

Médiel: aro. as a teen she realized she was never going to fall in love, and her immediate reaction was that it was another gadget in her arsenal to infiltrate la Corte. fake dating but the other party doesn't know it's fake. as for her sexuality, i'd say if you are hot she'd fuck you.

TFB:

Arion: aroace. also 7 years old in canon. but yeah, as a grown up he'd be that. he's also very autistic (i think his sexual identity is very tied to that, unlike with karma where i think it isn't as much).

Chimera: aro. no idea what his sexuality is ngl. he's just vibing, man, bringing his little brother into adventures with folk people in the forest.

[sungracd]

♡ + Adri & Kaeya 😌❄️

SEND ME ♡ + A SHIP AND I'LL TELL YOU...

who is the most affectionate ? adrian ! kaeya may be the most flirtatious but adri is the most affectionate .

who initiates the handholding ? adrian ! like before , they're v affectionate and more likely to initiate any physical contact . because kaeya doesn't seem averse to it they just assume he's shy and showers him in hugs , kisses , etc . until he's comfortable enough to initiate himself .

who worries more for the other ? adrian . kaeya is a knight after all , a khaenri'an , and the relationship with the only family he has is strained at best . there's a lot going on compared to adri's relatively simple life . plus i'm sure kaeya noticed at some point that adri keeps a dagger on their person so like , they can probably take care of themself lol .

who is more likely to ask for help ? if we're talking like emotionally then neither . they both put up walls for a reason . but because of that they'll probably recognize the signs that the other isn't doing so well and will bring up the topic for them .

who is the one always losing the keys ? neither , they both have their shit together too much lol .

who leaves little love notes for the other ? kaeya ! i feel like he'd be more comfy expressing his feelings via paper , plus he has really pretty handwriting for a reason hehe .

who can’t sleep unless the other is there ? kaeya . nevermind the fact adri doesn't really need it lol . but kae seems like he'd sleep a lot better with a warm body and even better if that body makes him feel safe and loved . ♥

who is more likely to propose to the other ? kaeya ? if only because adri doesn't really view marriage the same way humans do . but also they would feel much more inclined to share their uh . . . history if things got to that point , which they don't intend to share for a while tbh 👀

who introduced the other to their family first ? this is kind of a weird question cause of kaeya's relationship with his fam and adri doesn't technically have one . but they're prone to found families with the orphans of mondstadt and the random people they take in , so in that sense kaeya would definitely have met them first ??

who is more likely to play with the other’s hair ? i'm biased and say all of adri's partners play with their hair cause it's just so big and fluffy and there you can't help but reach out and touch or twirl it around your finger or smth hehe . but adri would also love brushing and braiding up kaeya's hair too .

who makes sure the other has meals / stays hydrated ? adri because they know kae can end up neglecting his health sometimes , especially when stressed . during these times they'll opt to make smaller or lighter meals so he'll be more inclined to eat them and offer a bunch of relaxing teas .

who is more likely to stand up to anyone for the other ? both ? i mean adri is always protective of people lol , they're just especially fierce when it comes to their partner . and as a knight kaeya is always standing up for others but especially the people he really cares for .

who is the most likely to prepare a surprise for the other ? kaeya ! he's really good with keeping his cool and his secrets and he's really thoughtful when he wants to be so he's awesome with surprises and adri is pretty easy to please .

who makes the other pinky promise not to do certain things ? adrian lol . they can both be pretty chaotic when they wanna be but unlike adri , kae doesn't mind playing the bad guy so he'll probably be ok with crossing a lot more lines . adri understands he (usually) has good intentions but if not they'd make him promise not to do anything too extreme .

who puts a blanket over the other when they fall asleep on the couch ? adrian ! kaeya seems like a light sleeper or just someone who has trouble falling asleep so if it happens adri would rather not disturb his rest for any reason . they'll adjust him a little if it looks like a bad position but other than that they'll just put a blanket over him wherever he is , give him a lil kiss on the cheek , and let him be . 🥰

[barsibatosbiggestfan]

Genshin characters with a sugar baby

Characters included: Diluc, Childe, Ningguang

Warnings: 18+ content, childe is just a menace

I’m really just writing this because i’m a broke simp lmao. I wanna get paid to be with someone as hot as these guys ;-;

Diluc

Diluc gets a sugar baby mostly because he wants companionship but doesn’t want to deal with dating lmao

he honestly would just pay you to sit with him by the fire and have a conversation while cuddling

or you’re cuddling in his room because he wants you in as little clothing as possible but doesn’t want anyone else to see

Diluc is extremely touch starved so the cuddles mean a lot to him

a lot of times when it’s in his room it will lead into you cockwarming him, it’s still very intimate and he also just likes to tease you

of course there are times when he’s not so soft and affectionate, when he’s had a bad day and is feeling angry he practically just uses you as a toy to take out his aggression

his favorite option is to fuck your mouth, seeing you totally at his will with tears in your eyes helps him relieve his anger

but if he doesn’t fuck your mouth he pounds into you from behind, slapping your ass and pulling your hair as he goes

when you’re done with these more intensive sessions he pampers you so hard because he’s a big believer in aftercare, sometimes it feels like he’s paying you so he can take care of you lol

Diluc is probably going to end up attached tbh. you might move from being sugar baby to being married but he will still buy you anything and you’ll live at the winery so i think its a pretty good deal

Childe

Childe has very different intentions than Diluc, he got a sugar baby purely because he’s bored and horny

if you’re around him you’re going to be naked so he can touch whatever parts of you he wants

or he’d buy you pretty lingerie and have you wear that around him but honestly, he’s probably going to tear them off of you so don’t get to attached

when he has days where he has to do paperwork and boring shit like that he has suck him off from under his desk

sometimes he’ll just have you play with yourself in the corner of the room so he can pause his work and watch you throughout the day

during those days he will also sometimes just attach a vibrator on you and overstimulate you for as long as he wants

when he’s tired from training or fighting all day he has you just ride him all night while he just lays there with a cocky smile on his face

he’s bought your entire wardrobe because he likes it when you wear what he wants

if your thing lasts long enough he’ll begin to have softer moments with you

but for the most part he just wants to fuck so try not to get attached

Ningguang

out of the three, Ningguang is the most formal about it all. she sees it as a business transaction

you guys have a contract with everything that is expected between the two of you and the exact payments you’ll receive for different things

Ningguang is a very busy woman so she doesn’t see you often but when she does see you, the two of you are going to be at it for hours

she mostly has you please her, she likes you down on your knees eating her out, but even when this is happening she’s in total control

yeah, she’s always in control during sex. she’s a total dom and she expects you to do whatever she asks you to

but of course you have a safe word in your contract

if you’re afab she loves to scissor you while telling you that you can’t touch her at all

she also enjoys using a strap on and taking you in any hole she pleases

you probably end up working in the jade chamber to help stop rumors from spreading. she knows she’s in the public eye and people love to gossip so she tries to keep things on the dl

honestly she’s the most unlikely to have it turn into anything else, she’s genuinely just too busy lmao

but if you’re like me you can still hope for something because she’s just amazing and beautiful and everything

[heliotism]

TWIZZLY GUMMY COOKIE GENERAL YANDERE HCS !

requested by: @wellcrapineedaname ! thank you for requesting ^^

warning! swearing, destroying universes, toxic/yandere behavior, yknow the usual stuff

wow?!?!?!?!?!!! is that twizzly gummy cookie?!!!!

yep. she's here.

okay so. imagine you're just a lil' regular cookie who does stuff and. yknow you're just living your life

and then all of a sudden?? for some reason there's a huge hole in the sky and some weird cookies coming out of it

one of them being twizzly gummy cookie,,

she's here because she wants to destroy this universe, as always!!

but then she sees you. her eyes lock with yours, and she decides that maybe, just maybe she won't destroy this universe. maybe.

she never saw a cookie like you, in any other universe. you're... unique.

can this be called love at first sight? probably.

so. after a lot of stuff happening, mainly twizzly gummy cookie possibly getting beaten up by the main gang, twiz' would definitely just. drag you with her.

you are not going anywhere without her. she's clingy as fuck. like. on a scale of 0 to 10 she'd be a 1000.

she threatens literally anyone that tries to approach you, even if it's her gang of hot ass punky villains

it's just you and her, nobody else.

you don't like it?? she doesn't give a fuck. you've lost the right of hanging out with other cookies the moment you looked into twizzly's eyes.

occasionally she'll tell you about all the other universes she went to, how she always manage to escape the tbd (time balance department), stuff like that yknow. her stories can get really violent sometimes, so be prepared.

at first, twizzly gummy cookie had a love-hate relationship with touching you (/nsx)

like it seemed cool and all but she would never try it bc. being lovey-dovey is weird.

therefore you have to make the first move!!

once you decide to hold her hand, twizzly certainly won't let you go. turns out holding your hand is actually pretty nice!!

if you're fine with holding hands and being physically close to her, twizzly gummy will be very happy!!

however, if you want to put some (physical) distance between you and her— even just one or two inches,, she'll probably yell at you to come back and to NOT leave her side.

just,, don't.

so, hum. being "friends" with twizzly cookie can be kinda draining. you can't talk to anyone else, you can't get too far from her, and she's always talking about violence.

if you wanna stop talking to her, and thus, ending this really terrible relationship, this time, she will threaten you.

“you think you can leave me?!!” [very evil laughter] “that's so fucking funny!! just try to do that and boom!! you'll have to say bye bye to this universe!! just like when i first came here!!” “you want that, right? right?! seeing all your friends vanish forever— just imagine all the chaos and havoc!! ”

unlike other yanderes, when twizzly gummy cookie threatens you, she actually means it. if you try to like, run away from her, you'll just have a few hours alone before she catches you, and then. everything you've always known is gone forever.

while you and twizzly go into another universe, probably way way different from this one, all your friends, the cookies you've always known— they're gone.

twiz' won't even take her very much evil gang with her. it's just you and her, now.

she'll probably try to find another place for you two, preferably an empty universe, void of anyone.

that pretty much counts as kidnapping i think.

good luck with the trauma, [y/n].

oh yeah and if you, like a dumbass, try to escape again, she'll have no problem destroying this universe too.

so in short, twizzly gummy cookie is an extremely dangerous yandere to have. she'll literally destroy an entire universe just so she can be with you. she doesn't really care about your feelings, as long as she has you with her, she's fine.

done!! man i love this post's layout, it's so cool <333 i hope you liked those hcs!!

[spectral-kitkat]

Miraculous Rant.

Where the hell do I begin…

Season 1:

The show was decent in season 1. Some episodes were just mindless filler and probably weren’t needed in the grand scheme of things but they helped us get introduced to the characters, we got to know the plot and the world our characters inhabit. It was good. The love story between Adrien and Marinette was cute and off to a touching and fluffy start.

Season 2:

This season was immediately better than season 1. It had character development, it went more into detail about the lore surrounding the Miraculous and we got to learn more about our characters and their families and the villian’s motives. (HM really went from “I wanna destroy the world” to “I wanna wake my wife from the coma she’s in”).

We got to see new heroes which was fun! We got new characters like Luka and Kagami.

The season finale was epic! The Miraculous team all taking down all the previous villains in the show was awesome. At the end we even got Mari kissing Adrien on the cheek. It was great! (Even though it clearly reset itself in season 3 cause it’s never mentioned again)

I really enjoyed season 2 and it’s probably my favourite out of the 4.

Season 3:

Season 3 was kinda good and kinda bad. We had some great episodes but this is where the show took the wrong turn.

Marinette lost some of her character in season 3. This was the start of her descent into being the Queen of Mary Sues. It’s also where she was crowned the Queen of Stalkers! Her character took a fucking nose dive in this season. We had so many moments that just creeped me the fuck out.

1. The ENTIRETY of Puppeteer 2 🤢🤢🤢 I could not stand that episode. When we reached the dreaded statue scene I physically had to pause it like 10 times. That scene takes about 3 minutes to watch… it took me about 20. I cringed so fucking hard because of the secondhand embarrassment I was feeling. That was not sweet, it wasn’t romantic, it wasn’t the least bit cute… it was a train wreck! It was creepy and stalkerish and it’s a wonder Adrien even spoke to her again after that atrocity!

2. LB delivering the present in Chat Blanc. Two words: STALKER BEHAVIOUR!!! I genuinely could not believe my eyes when I saw LB run her hand across everything in his room and then actually SNIFF Adrien’s pillow. Like WTF!!! 🤮 I’m pretty sure whoever was responsible for that scene clearly thought it was the equivalent of when someone gets their S/O’s jumper or something and it still smells like them. But this turned it up to the nth degree and way passed the line of sanity.

Adrien was extremely under-utilised in this season. He didn’t really do anything. The only episodes we got about him didn’t really focus on him. ‘Felix’ whilst focusing on Adrien’s family didn’t really feature him. ‘Party Crasher’ while a beautiful mess was more about Mari trying to get into the party than the party itself. ‘Chat Blanc’ again focused more on Mari trying to fix her mistake.

We got even more heroes in season 3, not in the right order but they were there. It was fun seeing everyone’s transformations.

Season 3 was also the season of destroying redemptions. The big one obviously being Chloe. Season 2 was setting up this amazing redemption for her and before it could go anywhere it was wiped off the face of the earth during the finale (and don’t worry we’ll get to that dumpster fire later). Gabriel also had any remaining sympathy ripped away from him. How did the guy who stopped Gorizilla from letting Adrien die when he only thought he was CN go from that to using his son like fucking baseball in Chat Blanc when he knew his son was CN. Like I knew you were a shit father but you still cared about Adrien in some way shape or form but after that episode I can see I was clearly mistaken!

Before we get to the finale I want to talk about probably my 2 least favourite episodes from this season: Desperada and Reflekdoll

Desperada:

I fucking hated this episode! The only good thing was Luka getting to be Viperion, other than that this episode was awful!

Marinette was a selfish cringey bitch. Completely ignoring Luka to gush about Adrien to Jagged. Brushing Luka off as soon as Adrien turns up. Immediately cuddling up to Aspik and flirting with him when she needed to focus on the akuma (something which she has told CN not to do many times before)

Adrien, I love you kid but Jesus Christ you were a dumbass in this episode! Aspik’s design was terrible! Aspik himself was awful. I know Adrien tried his best but dude you were given the Black Cat miraculous for a reason! He shouldn’t have tried to be Aspik but even when he did he should’ve called it quits after like 5 resets not 25,913 times.

The only person with a brain this episode was Luka. So well done guitar boy, gold star!

Reflekdoll:

This episode was annoying! It was basically the start of the Marinette can do no wrong streak! When they have to swap miraculous I was happy cause it meant we got to see new outfits and see how they each handle the different powers. It would also serve as a way to get LB and CN to see what their partners role is first hand. Until we actually get to it…

LadyNoire is of course amazing and needs no introduction to using this new miraculous that she’s never used before. She’s cocky and confident and basically just LB in Chat’s costume with his powers.

Mister Bug on the other hand is just useless. He struggles with this new miraculous (like anyone would!) and is stupid and goofy. He has to rely on LadyNoire to solve the lucky charm. They swapped miraculous so shouldn’t that mean that Mister Bug should get the lucky vision and the creative powers that the earrings give him.

Overall Reflekdoll is awful. It was shitty writing and the start of Adrien getting the short end of the stick.

And now the season 3 finale… Just what the fuck. That is my only reaction: what the fuck!

Chloe you poor fucking child! What did they do to you!!! So much potential SQUANDERED!!!!

What was the point in bringing in all these different superheros with unique skill sets, costumes and transformations if you were just going to immediately reveal them to the main villian so they can’t be used again. That’s stupid! If you wanted the shock value that is “Oh no HM knows some of the heroes identities!” Then keep it as only some. Have like Max, Kim and Kagami outside trying to find somewhere to hide but unfortunately they get hit. Or Nino and Alya are hiding but the windows open and they get hit. Have some of the heroes hide so they’re fine! Taking away every ally of LB and CN’s was a stupid move! (Even if they wanted Alya to become a spy have her as part of the like 4 that get revealed or something, it’s not that difficult)

Season 3 was 50/50 for me

Season 4:

So I know season 4 isn’t even halfway through yet but so much is wrong with this season already that I need to vent!

So my biggest problem with this season of Miraculous: Tales of Ladybitch and Rena Rouge, I mean Rena Furtive… shit, Chat Noir! Is that CN is basically pointless! Adrien has been flung over a rainbow and is only remembered when he’s needed as

1. Marinette’s love interest

2. Someone for LB to shout at

3. A plot device

He has basically been sidelined. Partners my ASS!!!

Adrien is being blown off by pretty much EVERYONE! It’s coming to a point where this poor sweet summer child is going to crack! And it is not gonna be pretty… I definitely feel like the writers are leading up to a big fight between CN and LB which will probably end with Chat Blanc 2.0.

I REALLY HATE MARINETTE/LADYBUG!!!! In Season 3 I said it was the beginning of her descent, well in season 4 she’s done it. She’s descended, she has hit rock fucking bottom. She is so unlikable I don’t actually care about her as a person. She has entered full blown stalker territory it’s only a matter of time before she starts killing people for even looking at Adrien! Not to mention that Miss Mary Sue here can’t do anything wrong! She never has to suffer the consequences of her actions, she is always perfect no matter what she does… it pisses me off!)

She’s the Guardian now big whoop. I know what it feels like to be stressed and under pressure so I do understand why she needed to tell someone about it all. I just don’t see why that person had to Alya! Especially considering she has someone by her side every akuma attack going through pretty much the exact same thing. I know she’s worried about CB happening again but as I said before the more she leaves him out the more she is actually pushing that to become a possibility! Plus it makes sense for them to reveal their identities now since LB is now the guardian it’s probably a good idea to know who holds the cat miraculous, she knows everyone else’s identities!

Even if she didn’t want to tell CN her identity she could still explain the situation to him. If she didn’t want to tell him anything (which she doesn’t anyway) then instead of Alya she should’ve talked to Luka! Her boyfriend for all of half an episode (thanks writers…). He’s so sweet and caring and clearly loves her so much! If she wanted someone to confide in then why not choose the person you clearly wanted to date but couldn’t because of that very reason! (Yeah I know it’s kinda a moot point now since Luka knows both identities but still). He wanted to try and comfort her so it would’ve been the perfect moment for it. That way you could still date him and he’d know why you had to suddenly leave dates halfway through! But no break the boys heart instead!

Adrien and Marinette were both such fucking idiots in the first 2 episodes. Like why would you start a relationship with someone when you know your heart isn’t in it! That’s called leading someone on and is a really shitty thing to do to someone! No wonder Kagami and Luka ended up akumatized!

Another aspect of season 4 I don’t like is Rena Furtive. Yes ok having a spy for your side is a good strategy but when said spy basically tells an important member of a duo that the 2 person job doesn’t involve them… it just really ticks me off! Alya you are the sidekick to LB and CN! Chat isn’t!

Miraculous specials:

The Miraculous World specials suck! Shanghai is better than NY but still has its problems. Both specials add nothing to the overall plot/lore of the show apart from trying to set up some weird cinematic universe…

NY special:

One of the worst things I’ve ever had to sit through! The plane scene alone I paused a few times. I want to say well done to Mari for trying to move on from Adrien (especially considering I’m pretty sure she’s dating Luka at this point) but I can’t help but think it’s just to give her character some pointless development that goes nowhere and doesn’t actually develop anything!

LB can pretty much fuck off at this point! I hate her! She put all this shit on CN (like she doesn’t know exactly how that feels). It’s like why does she get to go off on holiday but CN can’t. LB should’ve stayed in Paris for 3 reasons:

1. She’s recently become the guardian meaning it would probably be best that she stayed with the Mircle Box

2. She’s the only one who can purity the akumas

3. If she’s so sure about being the boss then she should take responsibility of Paris and the citizens.

What really pisses me off about her is what she says to CN during the big fight. “I can’t trust you”… surely you could have this conversation afterwards since you’re supposed to be focusing on taking down the villian! Plus everyone bashes Adrien for giving his miraculous up in this episode but look at it from his point of view: His partner and best friend just said she couldn’t trust him which in turn caused him to cataclysm someone and essentially kill them. That’s gonna take a toll on anyone, especially a 14 year old! He probably thought in that moment. “Ladybug needs a partner she can trust and someone who won’t mess up and kill someone. She needs a better partner.” It makes sense he renounces his miraculous! I’m just upset that in doing so he loses Plagg who is pretty much his only friend who actually understands what Adrien goes through at home.

When Uncanny gets CN to come back, LB acts like it’s not her fault in the first place that he feels inadequate! She didn’t even apologise for saying what she did! He apologised for lying about not being in Paris but nope LB wasn’t in the wrong at all and didn’t have anything to apologise for 🙄… (yes the LadyNoir hug was amazing but I just wish it was under different circumstances!)

Also are we not gonna mention Gabriel Agreste almost starting WW3??? He wanted to launch a fucking missile!!!

Shanghai:

As I said before, this special is way better for several reasons.

We got MariChat! (Best side to the love square imo). This special actually had some semblance on a plot. Fei, whilst a bit op, was a cool character. It was nice to see Wang Cheng again.

However once again there were many problems.

A big one being Marinette yet again! (What a shock! 😒 I’ll come back to this). Another was that once again HM’s motivation has changed. How is getting the Prodigious gonna help bring back Emilie??

Back to Marinette… The fact that the words “Huh?! There must be some kind of mistake! I always know what's up with Adrien! … His 5 first names and every corresponding name date, his yearly schedule, even his shoe size! If there were anything to know about him, I would know it!” come out of her mouth whilst she is flipping through his schedule that she keeps in her pocketbook is a hugh red flag!!! That is not cute or adorable! That’s messed up and Adrien needs to fucking run and maybe possibly go into witness protection… Marinette is a full blown stalker! Not to mention the GPS she has (that could just be the find my friends app on iphone but still).

It also is extremely rude of her to use not only her great uncle’s birthday but also a lie about wanting to know her Chinese heritage in order to go to Shanghai to stalk her obsession, I mean crush. This could’ve been avoided if the Dupain-Chengs were going to Shanghai for the purpose of celebrating Wang Cheng’s bday and then Adrien just so happened to be in Shanghai.

Also this means LB left Paris without telling CN! I know CN did the same but again he can’t purify the akumas. Plus he has a reason he couldn’t stay in Paris, Mari just went cause her crush did. Great guardianship there Marinette.

This was also the last time CN actually did something. Even if it was for a short while before LB and her female partner took over (the beginning of a theme…)

Other things:

There are 2 other things that I wanna say but felt they needed a separate bit.

In Furious Fu, Su-Han has a rule book that he uses to tell Marinette which rules she has broken. At the end of the episode he tells her that is she breaks 1 more rule that he will take the Miraculous and the Miracle Box off her, which fair enough but wouldn’t it be helpful to leave the rule book with her?! How can she be wary of not breaking anymore rules when she doesn’t even know what the rules are??

Now the big one: Master Fu…

Where do I even start with him. He is so fucking manipulative!! He is Asian Dumbledore!

He decides to leave these extremely powerful jewels in the hands of 13 year olds! Surely leaving the miraculous to someone in their 20s would’ve been better!

He clearly favours LB over CN even though the Ladybug and Black Cat are supposed to be partners! Wouldn’t it make sense for them both to be in contact with the guardian from the start?? He randomly started introducing rules such as if LB and CN find out each other’s identities they would lose their miraculous… what kind of bullshit rule is that? It also came out of fucking nowhere!

Final Thoughts:

But to summarise all of that: Miraculous is on quite a steep decline but I’m invested at this point and I am genuinely curious as to where the fuck this will go.

Marinette needs professional fucking help before the writers even consider canonising Adrienette cause at the moment she is not what Adrien needs!

Adrien needs to stand up for himself! He needs to pull LB to the side and tell her what he feels and what he’s going through cause he is on the precipice of a breakdown!

(Small point that’s more to do with the fandom: when searching for fanfics it’s really annoying that Adrien Agreste/Chat Noir Bashing is a tag but Marinette Dupain-Cheng/Ladybug Bashing isn’t. Why does everyone think Marinette can do no wrong???)

[rebeccccccaaa]

𝕭ʟᴜᴇ 𝕳ʏᴅʀᴀɴɢᴇᴀ

_________________________

sᴜɢᴀʀ ᴅᴀᴅᴅʏ!sᴛᴇᴠᴇ ʀᴏɢᴇʀs x sᴜɢᴀʀ ʙᴀʙʏ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

sᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: you come home from california after a year back to your old man

(Heavily inspired by Heroin by Lana Del Rey + Lightly by Old Money by Lana Del Rey)

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢs:: major angsttt, smut 18+ minors dni plz, bit of fluff, age gap

TW/CW: past drug use [reader], post-rehab

ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ’s ɴᴏᴛᴇs: lana del rey’s music gives me major sugar daddy!steve vibes idky lol

(also brief description of ‘reader’ written to have hair that can moved from the face is like one sentence sorry but ur giving daddy steve a bj)

___________________________

You grabbed your bags and walked to the pick up spot at the JFK airport. It’s been a year since you’ve been in New York and you missed the city terribly. You especially missed your old man.

You stood for a minute scanning the bodies that littered across the floor until your eyes met those beautiful cerulean blue eyes you spent so many hours looking into. Instantly tears brimmed your eyes watching him move swiftly past the people dressed so casually unlike his usual stature sporting that incredible all black suit he always wore.

He looked tired and drained. Like he hadn’t slept in days.

“Y/n,” he came up to you, cupping your face before pressing his lips to yours passionately, desperately.

“Fuck, Stevie. I missed you so much,” you cried.

“I missed you too. I thought about you all the time; everyday, every hour, every second,” he hugged you tightly.

“Stevie, I wanna go home,” you whispered against his lips.

“Let’s go home,” he told you.

Home.

It’s been so long since you’ve been home.

You got to the car and Steve told you to just wait in the car as he put your bags in the trunk. You smiled softly at him before slipping in the passenger's seat waiting to go home like you’ve been dreaming about since the day you left. Steve quickly slipped into the driver’s seat himself and drove off eager to go home and finally hold you close again.

The car ride was quiet. You watch the blurry lights through the wet glass window of the car and your mind could help but wander back to the day Steve saved your life.

One Year Ago

You stumbled your way through the elevator doors with a lazy smile on your face.

“Stevie!!” you screamed when you saw him sitting at the counter with a whiskey in hand.

“You’re late,” he said quietly.

“Sorry,” you said.

“Why were you out so late? I gave you a curfew,” she said sternly.

You weren’t giving him much time, your body was on fire. You unzip your dress, not so gracefully, strippping out of your clothes. You pranced around in your panties and a bra giggling and running around asking Steve to catch you but he was having none of your shit.

“Get your ass over here right now!” his voice boomed startling you.

He pressed the back of his hand against your forehead and roamed his hands along your body anyway but sexually. Your skin was extremely overheated and flushed. He was pissed. You had promised him the reckless behavior was over, but you couldn’t.

You were an addict.

“What the hell are you on?” he said firmly.

“Guess?” you were absolutely not taking this seriously.

“I’m not gonna ask twice; tell me!”

“Molly,” you whispered shamefully.

“God fucking dam-” he rubbed his face in frustration.

"Why do you even care so much you're- I- I'm nothing but a stupid sugar baby, anyway, " you slurred your words.

“You're more than that, and I know you fucking know it. You promised me you were going to stop! I’m done, I'm done” he breathed out. His chest felt like it was tightening, he couldn’t breathe anymore. He felt nauseous.

“No! No, no, baby; please!” you cling onto him like a child.

“You could’ve been hurt! What would happen if that shit was laced with something that could have killed you, hell taking it alone in the first place could have been the last straw! I’m doing this shit with you anymore.”

You cried, no you sobbed hysterically. You need Steve, he was your everything, your rock, your hope, your love. You knew you were a huge mess but you couldn’t stop. You didn’t know how. Didn’t know where to begin, who to go to. You felt alone.

You grew surrounded by money but when you moved to New York, you succumbed to the temptations and your parents were done with your shit. Meeting Steve, agreeing to this sugar baby thing was simply to use his money for drugs and alcohol, that’s all you lived for. Your life was over, might as well fuck yourself over while you're at it.

But you fell in love.

Goddamn, the man was perfect. He was treated with so much love and gentleness and compassion. You hadn’t felt so loved since you cut your ties with your parents and it hurt so good. You wanted to quit for him. The first night he found you disheveled and fucked, you were so embarrassed. You promised him it would stop that you were gonna be clean; but that only lasted twelve hours.

He should’ve ended it. He should’ve stopped whatever this relationship was. He told himself it was one time thing but once turned into twice, then four times until you went out every night getting high off your ass with anything that was available.

Steve couldn’t take it anymore. But like you, he fell in love too. He loved you. He really loved you. He couldn’t imagine his life without anyone else and the thought of losing you made him terrified.

“I’m done! I can’t sit here waiting for you every night wondering if you went too far! Staring at my fucking goddman phone waiting for the day they call and tell me you killed yourself! I can’t do it! You promised me you were done with this shit but here you are high off your ass again with molly,” he cried. Tears streamed down his face, his heart pained at the sight you breaking down.

“I need help, please,” you whimpered.

“Are you going to let me help you?” he sniffled.

“Yes! Please, help me,” you sobbed.

“Pack your things. You’re leaving for California tomorrow,” he said.

“What?”

“There is a rehabilitation center in California and I want you to go there,” he whispered.

“No-”

“Please, Y/n. it’s only for a year-”

“A year! No, I can't be away from you that long, please no!” you sobbed even more.

“It’s for the best,” he tightly holds you down.

“Why not here-”

“It’s for the best. I promise I’ll be waiting right here for you when you get back. I swear,” he looked into your eyes.

“Stevie,” you cupped his face, “I don’t wanna leave you.”

“I know; I don;t want you to leave but I promise you’re gonna get on that airplane and you’re gonna come back and tell me everything’s ok, yeah?” he pressed his forehead.

“Ok. You make me feel I can change. I’m gonna come back and tell you that I have really changed,” you promised.

“I believe it,” he smiled.’

“Maybe California is good. Something about this city makes my head go crazy. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t sick of it,” you told him.

“I love you; so much,” he whispered those words for the first time.

“I love you too,” you cried.

“You ok?” Steve pulled you from your thoughts.

“Hm? Yeah, I’m just- I’m really happy to be home,” you choked out.

Steve grabbed your hand and brought it to his lips kissing you softly. His eyes stayed on the road every now and then glancing at you like a dream come true. You pulled up to the building where you two lived and Steve asked the entourage to take your things up for you. He lifted you in his arms with a beautiful hopeful smile and carried you to the apartment.

When the elevator door opened he practically ran to the bedroom nuzzling his face in your neck kissing lightly. You somewhat took in the familiar surrounding noticing no change since you’d last been there. It was bittersweet. He hadn’t changed a thing since you left.

“I missed you so fucking much, baby,” he whispered.

“Steve,” you sighed, combing your fingers through his hair.

“I’m never gonna let you go again.”

“You won’t have to. It’s all over; no more clubs, no drinking, no drugs, none of it. That girl, you used to call the queen of New York City, she’s gone. ”

“You’re still my queen,” he smirked, making you chuckle.

“I’m so fucking proud of you. You are so strong,” he praised.

You grabbed his neck and pulled him forward crashing your lips against his. You molded perfectly against like you were made for him. Like everything had led up to this moment. It felt different this time; his hands touching you delicately.

You two have had sex many of times but this time it was different.

He peeled your shirt off your body pressing kisses all over your chest. His tongue flicking over your nipple making you gasp softly. His hands gripped at your waist as he brushed his nose between the valley of your breasts.

You craved his skin on yours, practically clawing his shirt off his body. He got the memo and briefly sat up ripping his shirt off his body before falling back on top of you. His hips settled between yours and you could feel his growing erection poking through the material of his flimsy sweats.

You pushed him off your body, flipping him so you could straddle his waist; smiling devilishly as you brought your hands up to your breasts to massage them. Steve growled at the angelic sight above him pulling your hands away to replace them.

He twisted your nipples as you slowly grind your hips over his for a moment. That moment quickly died as you snaked down his body curling your finger over his pants. You languidly pulled them down his legs letting his erected cock spring free. You moaned at the sight, haven’t been able to see it since you left that fateful morning.

You wrapped your hands around the base of his cock and stroked his dick slowly pulling wanton moans from him that were music to your ears. You leaned forward and licked teasingly along the tip before swirling your tongue around it making him groan. His hand went to your head combing your hair from your face gathering it in a messy ponytail.

Your lips wrapped around his cock perfectly just that way he likes it; like you’ve a thousand times before. He looked to the ceiling and sighed at the pleasure you were giving to him. He was never one to make much noise during sex but he was craving your mouth wrapped around him; he couldn’t contain the moans and grunts that wanted to come out. He couldn’t wait until he’s buried between your thighs.

You cheeks hollowed around his dick sucking hard before you take him all at once repeating over and over again. Steve’s hold on your hair tightened with every bob of your head thrusting his hip in time with your rhythm. Hitting the back of your throat, Steve’s hip stuttered and his legs shook approaching his orgasm fast.

“No, I wanna come in you, baby girl,” he panted, pulling you off of his dick. You quickly discarded your panties before climbing back on top of him to straddle him, knees on either side on his hips. You cupped his face kissing him senselessly; passion and lust and most importantly love enveloping you two.

You lifted your hips briefly as Steve lined his cock with your soaking entrance and slowly sunk down allowing him to stretch you impeccably. You moaned in sync, like you were becoming one again after so long being unable to hold each other.

His arms wrapped around holding close as you waited a bit to adjust to his size again. He peppered faint kisses along your neck and collar bone, nipping playfully at your skin too. You felt so full and incredible basking in his attention and the feeling of your walls wrapped around him again.

You moved your hips back and forward, your clit grinding against his pelvis making you shiver in pleasure. You face tucked tightly in the crook of Steve neck, your thrusts getting faster and faster. Steve’s hands moved to your hips lifting you slightly before slamming you back down on his cock harshly. This made you throw your head with a cry of pleasure, strings of curse words flowing from your mouth.

“Fuck, Stevie. I missed your cock so much,” you whined.

“I missed you too baby,” he grunted.

You looked at his face watching it contort with pleasure, his eyes completely screwed shut overwhelmingly. Sweat lined his forehead, the shorter pieces of hair sticking to it. You brought your hand to it brushing his hairs back so you could see his face in it’s fullest beauty.

He peeled his eyes open, staring directly into eyes and breathed heavily in time with you. For a single moment between you both, time stopped. It felt as if the world was gone and all that mattered was right now; you being back in your old man’s arms again, the love of your life.

You couldn’t help the quick glance at his red swollen lips, desire to kiss them again overcoming you. You leaned forward capturing his lips for what felt like the hundredth time tonight, but it's something you’ve ever got tired of. The way slightly chapped lips molded perfectly with yours.

“I love you, baby,” he moaned.

“I- fuck!” you couldn’t even speak anymore when Steve’s thrusts became harder and faster desperate to chase both your’s and his orgasms.

“Look at me baby,” he growled, “You were fucking made for me. No one can ever fuck you like I can. No is ever gonna take care of you like I do. And no one, absolutely fucking no one, is ever gonna love you as much I do.”

Tears streamed down your face; overwhelmed with love and desire and lust. Steve saved your life and you owe him everything. You loved him evermore; he is everything. Steve kissed you again, addicted to your lips, tasting the salty tears that came from your hopeful and loving eyes. He wiped the tears away with his thumb.

“Stevie, I’m gonna come,” you whimpered.

“Come all over my cock baby girl. You deserve it,” he whispered.

Your body shook as you reached your high. Chanting Steve's name like prayer, like it was the only word you knew to say. Steve’s rutted his hips into one last time spilling his seed inside you, hot cum coated your velvety walls. You collapsed forward onto him and he held you tightly.

Your fragile body trembled against him and Steve's heart ached a bit. He knew you were overwhelmed, hell so was he. But he was so utterly happy to have you back. There were so many nights where Steve lied awake at night, unable to sleep without you, day-dreaming of a future with you when you’d come home. He knew you were a strong woman and he knew you were going to come back to him healthy and stronger than before.

He remembers the day he came back to New York after leaving you in California. He was with his old pal Bucky at a local bar in Manhattan. He’s always really known inside that he’d fallen in love with you, he’d proven already that he’d do anything for you. But that night is when he finally admitted it out loud to himself and to others. Steve can’t imagine his future with anyone else but you and he’ll be damned if something happened to you.

“Sweet girl, I love you with all my heart,” he whispered, stroking your back softly.

“Even when I’m old; when I shine from words and not from beauty?” you whispered.

“I will love you evermore,” he said.

He whispered more sweet things as you cried holding him tightly spending your first night back together in his arms. Before, you didn’t know where life was gonna take you; either to the moon or six feet under. But Steve swept you away to a promiseland and you’ll follow him blindly. It didn’t matter where life was going to take you next as long as you were with your old man, you were happy.

Completely and utterly happy.

=====================

ᴛᴀɢʟɪsᴛ: (For all my work)

@mathletemadison​

@buckybarnes101​

@l-sofiamia-l

@pluto-grl

@partr1dge

@stefans-wife

@cordeliaswhore

@fleurlovesbucky

@wandanatasha0720

[angelyuji]

first dates with my faves 😁 : nanami, loki, mammon, arvin, peter maximoff, and 707: yandere edition

cw // forced kissing, guys having a weird thing for innocence, stalking, breaking in and stealing personal items, society, awkward dates, kidnapping, mild to extreme yanderes, shoplifting, unconsensual touching, implied murder, religion is used wrongly to control

nanami: expensive restaurant - is on edge after being forced to go (by gojo). he’ll be watching your every move: the way you talk, the way you sit, the way you excuse yourself. he’ll size you up: your dress, your shoes, your jewelry. god, youre so polite and so friendly, his heart warms at your smile. your mannerisms make him wanna grab you and just hold you close. you’d get your menus and he’d order, then he’ll look at you and you’ll only be able to open your mouth before he just orders for you. you’ll be surprised, but you won’t say anything. giving him enough information to know that you’re perfect for him. he’s not the type to kiss or take you home on the first date, nanami is a gentleman, but you...you’re an exception. he’ll take you to your front door before watching your eyes. he sees such an innocent shine and he wants to protect that innocence for himself. he’ll lean in, holding the back of your head, and he’ll force bring you into a kiss. you’ll warm up to him eventually.

“my tie would look beautiful around your neck, darling”

loki: reallly expensive restaurant - like nanami, he’d be watching your every move. he’ll treat you like you’re inferior to him. he does not wanna be on this date, so he’s not gonna treat you that well. he’s watching you in absolute distaste, hoping you’ll slip up so he can tear you down. watching the way your outfit hugs you, the way you pick up you utensils, the way you laugh every time he sneers at each course. halfway through the dinner, he’ll realize that he’s paying more attention to you than his own dinner. loki won’t wait for you to pick something to eat, not because he wants to see if you’re his type, but because he doesn’t care about what you want. you’ll eat what he orders, no exceptions. the more you go along with everything he says, the more he’ll start looking at you as more of a pet than inferior to him. at the end, if ur not absolutely done with the bs, he’ll drive to your place and look you up and down. as you squirm, he’ll smirk before pulling you into a kiss. you wont be able to fight the kiss, his grip on you strong. then, he’ll reach over, open the door, and tell you to get out. he’ll come back for later though when you’re least prepared.

“get your clothes, pet. you’re coming with me”

peter maximoff: shoplifting - he's all casual, looking to have fun. you walk in to the mall thinking you're going to go shopping as a first date, and he's gonna be late. he'll be watching you from afar to see if he likes you, first. he'll look at your outfit, the stores you go in, what kind of clothes you browse through. he'll speed in, grab your phone, and scroll through that. 30 minutes into your date time, he'll show up in front of you, dragging you off into one of the designer stores. its a test when he grabs the first shirt off the rack, he wants to see how you’d react. are you a prude or are you the one he's been waiting for? are you gonna get angry or just let him do his thing. he'll watch your face as he grabs more and more, seeing you react makes him chuckle. your face twisting in worry, glancing back behind your shoulder every time an employee walks over. he starts to enjoy getting you all riled up and anxious. he laughs every time you ask him to stop and tells you to just relax, he knows what he's doing. by the end of the night, your nerves are shot and you feel like throwing up every time you glance towards the bag of stolen goods. peter doesn't kiss you, but tells you he'll call you before speeding away and leaving you in the mall parking lot.

"don't worry, no one will find out what we're doing"

mammon: watching the stars - mammon will text you to meet him in the planetarium. he’ll have everything ready: a blanket, some snakes, and music. he knows you and he knows you love him already, this "first" date is just confirming to him that you're his. he'll be so sweet for the first time (and the last). he'll be complimenting you so much, calling you his sweet angel, his love, his lovely human. it'll be the little things though, that leave you on edge. the soft touches, the hand on the thigh, the hand too low on your back, the way he moves you to his lap. small things that leave you feeling gross. mammon would be so happy you choose him. he'd never show it, of course, but you'll see it with every hidden smile and the clammy hands. he'd tell you to lay down next to him and he'd force you to lay your head on his arm. every couple moments mammon would inch closer and closer, and soon you'll be a tangled mess of limbs. by the end of your date, mammon would be nuzzling into your neck and you're more rigid than a new pair of shoes. there is no walking back to your room with mammon, he'll keep you next to him till the next morning or take you to his room.

"you smell really nice. why're you moving away, come closer to me"

arvin russel: drive-in theater - arvin will come to your house to pick you up. he'll be jittery and the moment you climb into his car, he'll be heads over heels in love. your gorgeous smile, the way your outfit shines in the setting sun, the way your shoes sound on the dirt. he lives for the simple things that you do. he's seen you for 5 seconds and he's obsessed with you. he'll be a gentleman, getting out of the car to open your door, keeping his hands to himself the entire drive to the theater. you're so pure to him, so innocent, so clean unlike him. he'll be listening to you talk about your family and your life with so much attention. you'll blush when you finally feel his stare, but he'll just tell you to continue, saying that he likes hearing your voice as he drives. if you confess about someone that has hurt you, he'll store that information away, and reach for you hand. he'd glow if you accept. once you reach the theater, he'll go and get snacks, locking the doors just in case. by the time he's back, the movie would have started and you're engrossed in the movie, he'd watch you for a little while. the way your eyebrows furrow, the slight bit of your bottom lip, and he'd smile when you tense at the sound of him opening the door. you'll lean on him, sending his heart into a fit. he'll hid his smile with his hand as your grip on his other hand tightens. when the movie ends, he'll drive you back and you'll both talk about the movie. he'll walk you to your door. you'll stare at each other, blushing, before he leans in and you follow suit. to arvin, you both fit together perfectly. once he leaves you, he'll go take care of anyone that can stand in his way.

"you hurt her. you hurt my girl... you're gonna have to pay for that."

707: picnic in the woods - the both of you were on house arrest to stay away from the agency’s radar, so when seven saw the chance to finally take you on a proper first date…he took it. he wants to treat you like the princess you are, even if you weren’t that willing to be with him. he’d set everything up before the date and make saeran drop u off. he’ll meet you at the start with a trail of roses. he’ll have a hand on your arm the entire time to make sure that you don’t stray from the path, and once you get there, fairy lights strung up on the trees, a red and white plaid blanket laid carefully in the middle, cute cat plates, and a picnic basket overflowing with food. as much as you hated being around your obsessive lover, you couldn’t help but be in awe of his hard work. he brought food that you’d enjoy and different games to play as you guys talk. saeyoung would make your date the most aesthetically pleasing. from the cute summer dress he forced you to wear to the cakes in wine glasses, he’d make it a date fit for a princess. he’ll watch as you eat, taking note of the way you cover your mouth to hide your smile. he’ll watch you the entire time in awe of your beauty. no matter what you’re doing, saeyoung will file it away as beautiful. seven would notice how you watch him carefully as well, it seems like you’re planning your next move, but as you get up, he’ll pull you flat on the ground. his arms would wrap around your waist and you’ll hug him back. he kisses you with a passion, pressing against you, trying to show you how he feels without words. your knight… your savior… your god wants a kiss in return for protecting you. how can you refuse?

“i am your god, mc. i’ll always protect you.”

-

[amazingmaeve]

Green Eyed Monster - Stefan Salvatore

TVD Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Summary: You were always going to be Elenas younger sister. You have always had a crush on Stefan but didn’t act on that since Elena was in love with him. You were only one year younger than Elena her being 18 and you being 17 and Jeremy being 16. You couldn’t believe that vampires witches and witches were real. When Damon and Elena get together you and Stefan form an unlikely bond.

Request: Hi hun please can I request a jealous amut with stefan salvatore where I Elena and Jeremy's younger sister and i make him jealous at a party with numbers 33,21,25,26,36,48,54,70,93,99,143 thanks so much xx

Requested by: @beth-winchester21

Pairing: Stefan Salvatore x Female!Reader

Warnings: Sex, jealousy, underage drinking, 18+

AN: I made her a year younger than Elena I hope that’s ok. And I didn’t put one number in because it didn’t fit I hope that’s ok with you. Also I blushed so hard writing this.

You’ve always like Stefan. From the day you met him when Elena brought him over. But you never did anything about it since they were in love.

Or so you thought.

You couldn’t believe when Elena got with Damon. To you Stefan was the better brother. He seemed like the better choice. You’ve met Damon he’s never really talked to you. You guess he didn’t care for Elenas younger sister.

That’s what you assumed Stefan thought of you as well.

You’ve had a few boyfriends in the past but they broke your heart. That’s why you kind of gave up on love.

But Stefan was acting really weird. He was flirting with you. He’s never done that.

But you flirted back. Since he wasn’t dating anyone you thought what’s the harm.

You always thought Elena and Stefan would be the perfect couple.

Now today me and Caroline were going to a party. You’ve been feeling a bit down the past few days so you thought a party might help you lift up your spirits.

It was the Salvatore mansion the party was at and you didn’t mind that you just hoped you didn’t run into Elena.

And here you were talking to a guy who just started talking to you. You didn’t want to be rude so you talked back.

You felt someone tap on your shoulder you turned around to see Stefan standing there.

“Oh hey Stefan,” You waves at him. He looked mad and you didn’t know why. You hoped you hadn’t upset him in any way. “What’s wrong are you ok,” You asked him in worry tone.

“Can I talk to you,” Stefan asked you in a deep tone. He looked over your shoulder to see the guys standing there, “Alone.”

“Oh yeah sure,” You accepted and walked further away from the guys you were talking to. “So whatcha need,” You asked wringing your hands together.

“Just wanted to make sure you were ok,” Stefan asked.

“Yeah I’m fine,” You answered while furrowing you’re brows. “Just that guy over there was pretty boring,” You state rocking on your heels.

“Yeah you looked pretty bored talking to him,” Stefan smiled down at you.

“Were you jealous,” You ask with a teasing smirk on your face. You took a sip of the alcohol wondering what he was going to say.

“Nope just worried about,” He casually said.

“Oh,” You surprised you didn’t know he was telling the truth. “I’m surprised I thought you liked me,” You muttered.

“I do like you,” He admitted with a smile on his face.

“Sure,” You sarcastically replied while rolling her eyes.

“Y/N,” Stefan snapped.

“What,” You snapped back.

“Just listen to me,” He asked in a harsh tone.

“Oh bite me,” You scoffed. You knew you were being dramatic but that’s how you always were. That was your flaw you were over dramatic about things.

“If you insist,” Stefan smirked as he brought his hands to your waist and his lips to yours.

You were shocked at first but kissed back your lips moving with his. You brought your hands to his neck and played with his hair.

His lips left yours and traveled to your neck where he kept kissing and sucking on your skin. You let out a tiny moan, luckily the music was so loud nobody could hear you. You could feel yourself getting more turned on by the minute

“We should uh take this to your room,” You let out a breathy moan after that. You didn’t want to have sex in the middle of a lot of people.

“Before we get carried away,” You whispered as he looked up at you with dark eyes.

“I agree,” Stefan whispered.

He grabbed your hand and walked up the stairs while you followed behind him. You were feeling a tad nervous you’ve only had sex with one guy. But you really wanted to do this. He made you feel things that other guys couldn’t.

The both of you stopped in front of his bed room door.

You walked up to his window and saw people on the front yard either passed out or dancing.

You felt Stefan walk up behind you and put his hands on your waist. You could feel his breath in your neck which made you feel even more turned on.

He began to pepper your neck with kisses which turned to him sucking the skin right besides your ear which made you moan. You felt your self to start to get wet which made you silently curse your self. He’s barely even touched you and you were already feeling like this.

“I wanna fuck you right against the glass so everyone can see how good you take it,” Stefan whispered which made you gasp. From any times you’ve had sex you have never experienced dirty talk at least not to this extreme.

“Well you wouldn’t want them to see what’s yours right,” You whispered already knowing he wouldn’t do what he said.

“You’re mine,” Stefan growled in your ear which made your whole body tingle.

“All yours,” You whispered turning around bringing your hand to his neck bringing him down to kiss you.

“Strip and get on the bed,” He whispered after the both of your pulled apart. His voice was deep.

You nodded and removed your shirt and skirt in front of him. You were going to take off your panties and bra but he stopped you before you could.

You laid down on his bed and on your back. You let out a sigh feeling the comfort of his sheets.

A few minutes later you were getting tired of the teasing you brought your hand to your pussy and started to rub your clit thought you panties. You felt him come on the bend and lay halfway on top of you and tapped your hand to make you move it.

“Don’t fucking touch what is not yours.” Stefan growled. You opened your eyes he had removed his shirt and that’s about it.

You let out a tiny smirk removing your hand from your underwear.

“Good girl,” He praises you with a smirk on his face. “Don’t forget who you belong too,” He whispered while giving you a look in his dark eyes.

Stefan leaned down to your stomach and began to kiss your stomach and every few seconds began to move lower.

When he got the edge of your panties you closed your legs feeling your self getting even wetter.

“Be a good girl and spread your legs,” He drawled out when he notice you closed your legs.

You didn’t compile at first which made him roll his eye before he squeezed your thought. “Oh kitten don’t make tell you twice.”

You compiled spreading your legs letting him slip between them. He pulled your panties down and threw them across the room, leaving your lower half completely undressed.

He smirked at how wet he made you feel. You were squirming from under his gaze.

He kept kissing right about right where you wanted him. He kept kiss around your pussy which made you let out breathy whimpers.

He put his hand right above your pussy and began to draw a figure eights on your clit. That action made you whine, he was doing it incredibly slow.

“I’m going to fuck you so hard you’re going to forget that guys name,” Stefan growled as he felt how wet you were. You whimpered as he started to go faster.

He dragged his finger to your entrance and thrusted his finger into your pussy. You let out a loud moan and arched your back as his fingers curled to your g spot. It seemed that everyone must of left because you couldn’t hear anyone. Damon probably kicked them out.

Stefan let out an amused chuckle at your reaction.

He brought his face closer to your pussy and started to lick at your clit which made you let out a strangled moan. Somehow you got your bra undone to leave you completely naked.

You put your hand on your belly to stop yourself from tugging on his hair.

He used his other hand to put your hand in his hair jestering for you to tug.

He eventually wrapped his lips around your clit which made you tug on his hair and let out many moans out of your mouth.

You could feel a tightness in your stomach and you could feel it about to snap.

He kept fingering while adding a second finger while keeping his lips around clit and only came up for breath.

As you were about to cum Stefan removed his hands and his mouth from your pussy.

You looked up at him with a surprised look on your face. “What the fuck,” You blurted out.

“Don’t worry princess you’ll get to cum soon enough,” Stefan promised with a smile. “Bend over and spread your legs,” He ordered you basically.

“What if I don’t want to,” You decided to tease him.

“Well if you want to cum you better get on your hands and knees now,” He replied calmly which surprised. He was so calm and demanding at the same time.

You decided not to push him any further and got on your hands and knees. You leant your arms in his pillow trying to get more comfortable.

You heard Stefan unbuckle his jeans and pulled his pants and boxers down. Stefan than came behind you and started to kiss your neck. You could feel how hard and big he was for you.

“Do you want to cum,” He asked you a question while moving his dick up and down your pussy coating his tip with you juices. He was trying really hard to not just to point into you.

“Yes please,” You whimpered as you felt his tip circle your sensitive clit.

“Don’t worry soon you will,” Stefan promised you.

He pushed his dick into you and you let out a moan at the size of him. He began to thrust slowly trying to get you used to it.

“Faster,” You moan feeling yourself build up slowly.

He let out a small chuckle before thrusting into you faster than before.

You could feel him touch your g spot which made you moan loud. You didn’t really want to be loud just in case Damon was here but you didn’t care about Damon in this moment.

He wrapped his arm around your waist and started to rub your clit in hard and slow circles. While you were moaning loud, Stefan was letting out tiny grunts in your ear feeling his climax approaching as well.

“Stefan I’m about to cum,” You whined tightening yourself around more than before which made him groan in your ear. He started to go faster on your clit.

“Cum now,” Stefan demanded and then you let go. The rope in your stomach snapped and you let out moans while you cummed around him. You felt him let his load into you. You were thankful he was a vampire since you didn’t want to get pregnant.

He removed himself from on top of you while you laid in your back. You came closer to him and laid your head in your chest.

He pulled his blanket over the both of you, “Are you alright I didn’t go to hard on you did I.”

“Nope it felt amazing,” You purred looking up at with a smirk.

“That’s good to hear,” He smiled down at you while kissing your forehead.

“You don’t want me to leave do you,” You ask looking up at him.

“No I want you to stay.”

[nohoney]

Hi hi! I love your Us series so much! It’s been a while since I came across it and I remembered how much I love it! 💕

2 questions I wanna ask about something’s I’m wondering about and your take on them.

Do you think there will come a time where MC comes to their senses and decides to leave? It doesn’t seem realistic for the series because they are so rooted there, I think it would be extremely hard to leave. They don’t treat them bad but they’re also not healthy for them.

What would happen or more like what would Keigo and Touya do if MC ever decides to leave?

Anyway, thank you for updating and taking the time to write. I really appreciate it 💕

Aw I’m glad you love it, it always gets me all flustered when the us series get appreciation 😖

So to answer...

1. the reader definitely has the sense in her that what she’s in is not exactly something completely ‘healthy’ and she knows when she’s in a particular situation it’s because of touya but then Keigo kinda swoops in to cover everything up until everything feels like it’s calmed down. as much as Touya is the source of her love & devotion, he is definitely the main stressor sometimes when she worries more about his reaction to things rather than her own well-being. And touya knows that he can only do so much to make her stay so having Keigo around offsets the chances of her leaving since he’s more sensitive & gentle with the reader. I think the chances of the reader leaving are very very low...

2. But on the off chance she reaches that small fraction where she does try to put her foot down to leave... i think we all know there’d probably be no way for the boys to accept the reader leaving. She hopes it could go down a peaceful way. So maybe... an honest face to face break up?

Scenario below the cut!

Warning: drug use/drugging, unhealthy relationship, codependence, manipulation, slight dubcon

You just have to be uncomfortable just for a moment while Keigo goes to fetch drinks from the kitchen. Touya keeps a straight face while you speak across from at the dining table, trying to reassure him that you don’t want to part on bad terms and that you just need to do what’s best for yourself, you’re talking about wanting to find your independence again and needing to figure things out on your own and all that stupid crap. Words of conviction that neither of them are going to accept from you, that you don’t know what you’re talking about and you need them.

They could tell immediately when you had started to try to pull away, could see that glazed off look in your eye as your mind wanders. Your smiles more reluctant, your affection waning, that sad look you had looking off into the distance, they thought it was depression at first. Keigo counts himself fortunate to have found you sitting with a friend a week ago on the patio dining of a restaurant, hiding himself just in time before you or your companion could see him. He had leaned in a little closer and his heart broke upon hearing you tell your friend, “I think I need to get away from them... Dabi and Keigo.”

Oh how Touya threw a fit when Keigo reported back to him, having the good sense to take him to an abandoned lot to tell him what he heard. Touya yelled, saying that he’s giving you everything he could give and you have the audacity, the motherfuckin’ audacity to think you could leave. His sanity is all on you and you leaving would make him lose his fucking mind. But Keigo was calm, he hushed Touya who damn near breaks down and is about to punch through the window of his car and tells him that he’s got it figured out.

“She’s ours, she just needs to be reminded.”

Your tolerance had gotten better with what you’re willing to take but that doesn’t mean that being careful is thrown out the window.

You’re banned from mixing ever since that first party where you locked yourself in a room with half a gram of coke and an ecstasy tablet, but Keigo is careful with you because he cares about you, he loves you. Just a sprinkle, like a pinch of salt, added to your drink and Keigo gives you a little extra pour of sweet syrup in your drink.

Ketamine which makes you trip and MDMA which makes you roll, and a trip plus a roll makes a flip. Your first flip ever was molly and coke and you don’t even know that you’re about to get your second; you’re about to have your first kitty flip.

Touya could have been mean and just gave you rohypnol but as angry as he was at you for wanting to break up, he still wanted you to feel good.

You finish half the drink when your eyes get the tranced over look and your voice drifts off, Touya reaching for your cup so that you don’t drink anymore. He drinks from his own cup, just the virgin version of what Keigo served you and he asks, “What were you talking about doll?”

“I uh... I don’t know what I...” you sway a little in your seat and you try to recall what was the subject you were speaking of a few minutes ago. “Touya... I don’t...”

They wait patiently as you struggle for your words.

And Keigo knows exactly what to do, gently cupping your cheek to direct you to look at him. You’re a helpless little doe at this moment and out there are the wolves wanting to feast on you, but not them, not Keigo or Touya... they’re not your predators.

They’re your protector.

“Pretty dove, do you love us?” Keigo asks you, watching carefully how you try to process his question.

“C-Course I do... never said tha’ I stopped, I just’ want...” you slur out as you reach one hand out to touch his cheek, trying to make sure he’s real. He wonders what you’re seeing right now and how he looks in your eyes. “Can I lie down?”

You collapse in Keigo’s arms, whining about some dress you should have bought at a boutique you visited not too long ago and then you stare at your own hands when Keigo lays you down on the floor, though you don’t bother to describe what exactly you’re seeing as you stare into your palms.

And Touya kisses you tenderly, just barely skims the tips of his fingers over your arm and you purr in pleasure. Unlike your first hallucinogenic trip which left you in an extremely anxious state, you seem to be perfectly balanced this time. Keigo is grateful that he mixed the right amount and you consumed not too much and not too little. You crawl to different areas of the room, muttering to yourself and can barely keep a conversation with either of the boys while they keep watch. But it’s not necessary for any conversation to be had, there’s no need for any talking because there’s nothing to talk about.

You ask for kisses, you ask to be touched, you ask if you’re loved, all requests that they’re willing to fulfill but on one condition: “You gonna stay with us (Name)?”

“Y-yeah, wanna stay with... be with ya, just c’mere... ‘M lonely.”

“Oh now you’re lonely? What happened to all that independent talk?”

“I don’t... Not s-sure, jus’ come here now.”

Needy little moans fall from your lips as they touch you, kisses to your neck and further down, despite your glazed eyes your fingers reach for one of the boys’ belts but they stop you. “You’re not getting fucked baby.”

“I want it!” You whine, almost ready to throw a tantrum but all it takes is just a hand in your hair, grabbing at the roots and slowly it clenches into a fist and tugs at the roots. A pleasant pull that makes your eyes roll to the back of your head and your back arches. Just a little hair pull and you’re so compliant. Your reaction is tempting but they know better than to fuck you when you won’t remember it the next day.

They would never.

All they want is for you to stay right where you are.

And you wake the next day in between Touya and Keigo, recognizing the symptoms of a come down but with no memory of the day before and you know that your memory loss has something to do with them. “What happened?”

Your body is exhausted, your brain is fried, you remember sitting down with the boys yesterday and talking about breaking up and then... nothing.

When you try to get out the bed, Touya’s hand reaches out to grab your arm and you’re pulled back down on the bed. He’s awake and making you lie back with them, his hand gentle as the pad of his thumb strokes your cheek so lovingly. Keigo nuzzles right next to you, a soft mumble of, “Stay baby bird...”

“You guys... what did you give-” you start to speak but Touya cuts you off.

“If it were anyone else, you probably would have woken up behind a dumpster ya know.”

Be grateful to us, we treat you better than anyone ever could.

You should be angry at them, furious that they’d violate your trust and lace your drink or food with whatever they gave you, that they gave you the ultimate reason to leave because if you love someone you don’t fucking drug them. And yet you know that whatever they gave you yesterday is a warning, probably the kindest warning you’ll ever get from them.

“Still love us?”

You play it over in your mind, that any other person probably would have taken advantage of your vulnerability but not them. Not Touya and Keigo who love you most ardently and have always looked out for you no matter what. There’s no talks of breaking up, there will be no talks of breaking up, they know you’re smart enough to understand the meaning behind their actions.

So you accept the cage they’ve put you in.

“Yeah... I love you.”

“We love you too.”

[iwa1zumis]

“i love you and i like you”: passion and burnout in Haikyuu!! 

tw: discussions of self harm, anxiety, burnout and breakdowns. 

spoilers for the whole manga!! 

okay this is probably gnna be jflkafjdklfj all over the place, but i’ve been thinking a lot lately about the difference between loving and liking something, and how haikyuu emphasises the importance of both those feelings being present when pursuing a passion. 

a quick look at google (and i KNOW my college professors are cringing away in horror victor frankenstein-style @ my use of google definitions but jflajfsdk bear with me!!) demonstrates how often the concepts of love and like are conflated, with love her being framed as a sort of deeper or more intense like: “to like or enjoy very much” to be specific. but personally i’ve always thought there’s something a bit misleading about that kind of definition, since its absolutely possible to love something or someone without necessarily liking them. to take a personal example: i love debate. i debated through middle and high school, made captain of the debate team, and was constantly travelling to and fro for different tournaments. even before i started to debate formally i’d jump at the chance to do mini-debates in class, argue with and rebut parents and friends over meals and causal conversation.... you get the idea. i loved debate, and still love it dearly, but i honestly don’t think i particularly liked it much. tournaments would always fill me with the most INSANE kind of stress, i’d barely eat or sleep in the days leading up to a meet, and i’ve had more muffled bathroom breakdowns in between rebuttals than i can count. after my final year of high school, i decided against joining the debate at university. i knew that if i were to retain ANY love for the activity going into the future, i had to force myself to take a break. 

so what does this solipsistic tangent have to do with haikyuu, you ask? well i have no doubt that a vast majority of the players in the series love volleyball. they’re dedicated and passionate about it. they hunger for the chance to be put on the court. but do they like to play? 

1. oikawa: “i forgot that volleyball can be fun” 

ofc i wouldn’t be an oikawa stan worth my salt if i didn’t start this off with the (grand) king himself!! imo one of the reasons why oikawa is such a popular and well-loved character is his constant determination to keep moving forward and playing, even in the face of seemingly insurmountable opponents and adversities (”never forget my worthless pride”, anyone?). inevitably, all the hard work and practise he put into his craft has left him with a very carefully constructed, put together playstyle-- he’s the kind of player who knows how to bring the best out of each and every teammate on the court because of the amount of time he spends observing them and playing with them. it’s an outlook and playstyle best encapsulated in his now iconic line during the second karasuno v seijoh match: 

“Talent is something you make bloom, instinct is something you polish!” 

in my opinion the word “polish” it super significant here-- it explicitly singles out the years and years of hard work that set a foundation for his talent and instinct to shine. 

but what happens when they don’t shine? there’s no denying that oikawa is an incredibly skilled and intuitive player (something that hinata’s acknowledgment of him as the “great king” to kageyama’s “king” immediately sets out) but oikawa himself is acutely aware of the fact that he can never quite measure up to his long-time rival ushijima or his immensely talented protege kageyama. oikawa’s self described strategy to deal with opponents is to: 

“Hit it until it breaks” 

but what happens when hitting something again and again with your carefully honed, “polished” skills yields no results? imo there’s a very clear binary mentality drawn here-- either you hit it and it breaks, asserting your superiority; or you hit it and it doesn’t break, enforcing your inferiority. with each perceived loss against ushijima and kageyama, oikawa’s internalized logic holds his own weakness up to his own face, shaking his faith in himself as a player. if you’ll pardon the on-the-nose-metaphor: the whole “hitting it till it breaks” strategy is a two-way street, and oikawa has been hitting himself, metaphorically speaking, for a very long time. i have no doubt that he loved volleyball, passionately, through middle and high school. but with his inferiority complex growing in the face of constantly refuted results, i think he slowly began to like it less and less. 

so how does oikawa get his groove back? to answer that, we’ll have to turn to the post-timeskip chapters, particularly the two chapters that deal with oikawa and hinata’s unexpected meeting in Rio (372 and 373 for anyone curious!). while reminiscing with hinata over dinner, oikawa finally reveals the event that made him want to play volleyball (as a setter, to be exact)-- as a child, he watched veteran setter jose blanco step into a game and

“... inconspicuously help[ed] the ace get his bearings again... and then simply left the court.” 

oikawa’s reaction to blanco’s playstyle might just be one of my favourite panels in the chapter for how it conveys so much with such little space: 

the stammer of “i-i--”, which suggests a sense of resolve and determination forming in real time, finally coalesces into the determined declaration of “i wanna be a setter too!” what i took from this is that oikawa’s admiration for-- and liking of-- blanco expresses itself in the agency with which he makes his choice, in this case, actively deciding to be a setter so that he can support players on the court like blanco did. the liking that oikawa has here is therefore inherently linked to the agency and freedom he feels here-- freedom to choose his position, and how he wants his volleyball career to develop. 

this recollection of his childhood memories, and the subsequent game of beach volleyball that oikawa and hinata play afterwards, essentially push oikawa back into the mental and physical space of a child or beginner, as the manga demonstrates with panels of oikawa being forced to ditch his usual carefully developed, polished playstyle to learn the ropes of beach volleyball: 

ultimately concluding with the beautiful panel transition of oikawa, as a child AND adult, celebrating after a successful play: 

“It reminds me that-- I forgot that-- volleyball is fun.”

in a different country, playing a familiar game by slightly different rules and led back into the mentality and freedom of a novice after years of careful development, oikawa rediscovers his liking for the game. 

2. kageyama: “when you get strong, someone stronger will rise to meet you” 

moving on to the king of the court himself!! i’d argue that kageyama’s childhood memories and experiences of volleyball function almost oppositely to oikawa’s-- while oikawa has to re-access the sensation of being a beginner again to like the game along with loving it, kageyama’s process of coming to like and love volleyball come from moving away from his early experiences and into a new phase of playing-- specifically, his partnership with hinata. 

one of kageyama’s defining features is his individualism-- he’s both skilled and solitary enough to prefer to, as he puts it, “play every single position on the court”. notably, he wants to become a setter because: 

“[it’s] the one that touches the ball the most.”

in fact, i’d argue that kageyama’s “king of the court” attitude that he was known for in middle school is an extension of this individualistic mindset: he holds himself to extremely high standards, and expects his team-mates (as extensions of himself) to meet those very same standards. the similarities between his internal monologue and his commands to kindaichi in these two panels, for example, are strikingly, visibly similar: 

there’s that near-identical intonation of “move faster, jump higher!” that implies that the way he treats his teammates is just an extension of how he treats himself-- a deeply self-critical, miserable way, as it turns out. it’s telling that for the first few chapters of a manga in which characters’ eyes literally light up when they’re happy, passionate or excited, kageyama’s eyes are drawn as pitch black, even while he’s playing. 

imo the reason why hinata’s appearance, and their later partnership, is so significant for kageyama’s personal development is because he can’t treat hinata like an extension of himself. hinata challenges him and his preconcieved notions of the sport at every turn: first with his lightning-fast reflexes and raw intuition, and then with his determination to hit kageyama’s toss no matter what. in fact, the first time that kageyama’s eyes light up in the manga is, you guessed it, when he and hinata first pull off a successful “freak quick”: 

during the post-timeskip chapters we’re introduced to kageyama’s backstory in much greater detail: the way in which his grandfather fostered his passion for volleyball and the timing with which his grandfather’s illness and later death left kageyama increasingly alienated, thus further enforcing his individualist mentality. but what the chapter also gave us was an explicit confirmation of a theme that had been built up from the very beginning of the story, when kageyama’s grandfather tells him: 

“when you get really strong, i promise someone stronger will rise to meet you”

i’ve seen translations of the line that use both “meet” and “challenge”, and personally i’d have to say that i prefer “challenge” for what it implies-- even before hinata got strong enough to actually meet kageyama halfway he challenged him to move away from his pre-established mindset of doing everything himself, and into one where he actually comes to enjoy-- and like-- volleyball. 

3. hirugami: “maybe you’ve just had your fill”

hirugami’s case is kind of a strange one-- unlike oikawa and kageyama he’s not a major character, and his relationship with volleyball only gets a single backstory chapter as opposed to a series-long arc. but i personally ADORE his mini-arc for the things it has to say about burnout, passion and moving on. 

hirugami is introduced as the youngest member of a volleyball family-- his parents, older brother and older sister all play the sport. when explaining how he began to play himself, hirugami says: 

“... naturally, i started to play too. because i was good at it, and it was fun.” 

imo there are a lot of really interesting things to pick apart with this phrasing: the “naturally” implies a foregone conclusion but also a degree of passivity, like he himself recognises that he was swept up in his family’s influence. the “it was fun” coming AFTER “because i was good for it” also implies a degree of correlation, as though if he didn’t have the aptitude, he wouldn’t enjoy the game (a mindset markedly different to both oikawa and kageyama). as hirugami gets older, this correlation of being good ----> having fun ----> being able to play begins to reverse, and therefore manifest in increasingly self destructive ways: 

the main impetus for hirugami has now become not wanting to lose, which therefore requires a degree of heightened practise and self discipline in order to achieve. notably, having fun has been reduced to an afterthought, a state that might be achieved if he wins. 

the correlation of “winning” and “being good” is a slipperly slope to go down, though, something that becomes especially apparent after hirugami’s team lose a game. the frustration of being unable to reach his goal of winning manifests itself as not being “good enough”-- acting on this, hirugami seeks to punish himself for “messing up”: 

the close up panel of hirugami’s “confession” after hoshiumi confronts him hits particularly hard because it taps into a feeling that i’m sure almost all of us have felt at one point or another-- the realisation that something you once both loved AND liked is now only bringing you misery: 

ironically, it’s actually this acknowledgement of “not really liking volleyball that much” that acts as a catalyst for hirugami’s recovery from burnout. hoshiumi’s acknowledgement of, and reply to, hirugami’s state is seemingly simple but deeply freeing: 

and honestly, why not just quit? there’s nothing tethering hirugami to volleyball, certainly nothing as serious as life or death. personally my favourite part of this panel is hoshiumi’s description of volleyball as food from which hoshiumi has “eaten his fill”-- a lovely metaphor that re-contextualizes what could be seen as “time wasted” into something productive and indeed nourishing. 

when we check up on hirugami post time-skip, we find out that he has indeed quit playing volleyball in favour of going to veterinary school, but he’s seen watching the game between the jackals and adlers on his phone with an eager, fond smile on his face, implying that it was the act of moving away from the table (so to speak) after eating his fill that let him still hold on to a love and passion for the game, even though he is now interacting with it as a spectator instead of a player. and indeed that might just be why i love hirugami’s arc so much-- with it, haikyuu tells us that sometimes passion’s don’t need to be re-ignited in the same way. while oikawa and kageyama rediscover their love for, and liking of, the game through a return to childhood and the arrival of a new partner respectively, hirugami’s journey away from burnout comes from recognizing that he can step away from the volleyball court, and that the love and like will still remain. 

[ace-in-a-shopping-cart]

Love on Open Waters: Chapter 1: The Capture

Prologue

Word Count: 1,419

Five Years Later

Patton smiled at Roman. “Alright, kiddo, time for bed.”

Roman looked up at him from his position on the bed. “Do you think Virgil will come back soon?”

Patton patted his head, dipping down to place a brief kiss on his forehead. “I don’t know, young prince. Maybe one day.” He walked to the door, leaving it open just a crack but turning the light out as he went.

Patton walked down the corridor, checking to make sure the other castle residents didn’t need anything. He went up a floor and did the same thing there, checking in on the king in his study and informing him of the time. He was thanked and sent on his way. He stepped through the main spaces, checking the other studies and the main living areas to make sure that everything was in place and that the maids had done their jobs to the best of their ability.

When that was done, he made his way over to the servants’ quarters and checked in on everyone. He sped up when he got to the maids’ quarters, not wanting to be caught in conversation with a certain person. He walked at a slightly faster pace, exhausted and wanting to get to bed before much else happened that night. His mind ran through all the projects he still had to do, the mending he wanted to do on his favorite suit jacket but also the new skirt he was planning on making.

His distracted thoughts had him slowing down until he almost ran into the one person he was trying to avoid. She stepped back but blocked his path in the narrow corridor. “Where are you off to, Patton?” Gaelle’s voice was higher than it was when talking to anyone else as she tried to put on an accent she thought he liked. Gaelle was someone that was under the impression that Patton was anything but exclusively gay. She seemed to have some sort of obsessive crush on him despite him wanting nothing to do with her.

Patton sighed. “Gaelle, I’m tired. I just wanna go to bed. Maybe do a bit of sewing first.”

She frowned and he knew he’d said something to displease her. “You know, sewing isn’t a very manly thing to do.”

Patton closed his eyes and nodded. “You tell me this every time you see me. And every time, I could not possibly care less about your opinion. I must, once again, inform you that I am not romantically inclined toward you. If I am to be blunt, I’m not even platonically inclined to like you. So, if you don’t stop harassing me every night and let me pass, you won’t have a job in the morning.” His voice had changed from tired to a honey smooth tone that meant he was extremely upset but wouldn’t show it.

She scoffed, not hearing the danger in his voice. “You can’t do that.”

He dropped the ‘customer service’ smile he’d been maintaining and gave her a look that was deadly. “Not only do I have the ear of the king, I’m still your boss. Either leave me alone, or pack your bags.”

She scoffed again but moved to the side. Patton gave her a tight lipped smile and passed, going on to his room. He stretched when he finally closed the door behind him, reveling in the feeling of dropping his mental burdens at the door. 

He moved away from his bedroom door and toward the small balcony that overlooked the ocean a few miles away. He leaned against the railing, trying to get lost in thought as he stared at the shifting water. Just as he was relaxing, an arm wrapped around his waist, a hand coming up to cover his mouth with a cloth. He tried to shout but made the mistake of breathing in. His vision faded as he clawed at his attacker, who simply held him until he passed out.

⚓⚓⚓

Patton woke with a headache. The ground shifted under him, constantly in a rocking motion. He raised a hand to his temple only to find that he wasn't bound. He stood and looked around the small room. There was a bed that he’d woken up on that was tucked into a nook of the wall, a desk that was attached to the wall with a chair which was attached to that by leather straps for arms, and an empty shelf above the desk. Looking around the small wall, Patton found a trunk sitting at the base and a hook for a coat on the wall.

He took a few steps forward, the cabin wasn’t very wide, and tried the door, only to find it locked. Sitting on the bed, he wondered what was happening to him.

He didn’t have long to wait before the sound of a key in the lock reached his ears and a man entered. The first thing Patton noticed about him was how tall he was, barely fitting through the door. He had on a long dark green coat that went down to his knees, a grey shirt that was open to halfway down his chest and revealed his chest hair, and loose fitting black pants with a sword on his hip. When he came into the light, Patton noticed that he wasn’t as tall as he’d thought, having a large and dirty green hat with a feather in it on. His boots were simple work boots, the kind that Patton had often seen on the hired help that came to the castle for a quick paycheck.

When the man came into the room and shut the door behind him, it took Patton a minute for his vision to adjust again as the green-clad man took a seat in the desk chair, taking off the hat as he did so. Patton noticed his hair was a bleached brown, his skin tan from the sun, he wore a mustache darker than the rest of his hair, and his right iris was almost white compared to his dark green left eye.

“Can you guess why you’re here?” The man’s gruff voice brought Patton’s attention back to the situation at hand.

Patton sighed. “Sir, I don’t even know where here is, let alone what I’ve done to deserve this.” He tried to put his usual authority into his voice to hide how badly it was shaking.

The man nodded. “You’re being held for ransom. You’ve harbored a person I have interest in for too long and I intend to have them back. Thus, you are going to write home and tell them that until they hand over the mer or a sum of money to his equivalent to make up for the loss of revenue, you are staying with me.”

Patton furrowed his brow. “The mer?” He thought for a moment but soon realized there was only one new addition to the household recently that would constitute such actions from someone. “Virgil,” he said under his breath.

“So you do know who I’m talking about,” the man said, a note of triumph in his voice.

Patton nodded. “Unfortunately, I don’t know where he is.”

The man narrowed his eyes. “Explain.”

Patton shrugged, not breaking eye contact. “Virgil did indeed stay with us for four months. However, he disappeared a day or so before my capture and, as far as I know, has yet to return. I can’t give up a location I don’t know.”

The man nodded and slapped his thighs before standing and putting his hat back on. “In that case, I’ll be back with food in a few minutes.”

Patton reached out a hand but didn’t touch him. “Wait! Am I at least allowed to know the name of the man keeping me prisoner?”

The man didn’t turn around but did speak. “Remus Cadoc, Captain Remus Cadoc.” He left without waiting for a response.

Patton sat in the locked room for what felt like a half hour before the door opened again. This time, it was someone else bearing a tray of food. Unlike Captain Cadoc, this sailor didn’t seem to have any weapons on his person. The man put the tray on the desk and doffed an imaginary hat at Patton. “Cap’n got caught up in work and couldn’t bring this to ya but told me to do it.”

Patton thanked him and stood. “May I know your name?”

He smiled. “The name’s Apollo Aiman. What’s yours?”

“Patton Hope.”

Chapter 2

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[baecvlt]

First Love

Pairing: Sougami (Byakuya Togami x Kazuichi Soda)

Warnings: Smut (all wholesome tho bc they barely met in this one)

A/N: Decided to write this up for the bestie (komaedanovio on TikTok; follow them). Azul would die for them and there are 0 fics abt them sooo. Yeah.

“So you’re part of the Future Foundation, huh?”

Byakuya pushes his glasses back as they were falling off his nose, then turning around to see the person who spoke. “Uh, yes,” he answered the pink haired man behind him, he stuck out his hand that he’d covered with a handkerchief,“Byakuya Togami”. They shook hands.

“Name’s Kazuichi Soda”

“I know. The ‘Ultimate Mechanic’, is it not?”

“Yeah! You look really rich. Valentino Couture?”

“Yeah—,” Byakuya answered, then looked down at his suit,“How did you know?”. “My mom was somewhat a tailor. She’d help fix and sew up suits such as yours, so I obviously had to recognize Italian threads,” he explained,“Made sure I washed my hands before approaching you, can’t stain a fine suit like that”. Byakuya was somewhat impressed. No one has ever appreciated his attire, he looked like a snob to most people.

Then again, Kazuichi isn’t most people.

“She taught me to sew, never let me handle suits,” Kazuichi added,“But I’d always see them in the closet hung up nicely”. He had a warm smile on his face, reminiscing tends to bring a little joy to him. “I think that’s just honorable,” Byakuya said warmly. “You think so?”. Byakuya nodded, the smile on Kazuichi’s face spreading. “Thanks,” he mumbled, but spoke up,“We should keep in touch, y’know?”. Byakuya began to think. He wasn’t really one for friends, Kazuichi was extremely beneath him. On the other hand, he was interesting to talk to and didn’t seem like a pest, right?

“That’s fine”

“Alright! How about we meet up during the island celebration? Tonight?”

Byakuya nodded, he didn’t know why, but he nodded. “Cool! See you later, Togami”. Kazuichi ran off, going to see if he can help with cleanup someway. As he ran, Byakuya had just realized he agreed to hang out with someone who he had just met. There wasn’t anything wrong with that, but it was just weird to him. I guess, he just seemed nice enough. Whatever. Now that the Tragedy is over, it’d be nice to return things to normal. Byakuya was ready to make new partnerships and if his first besides his classmates was to be Kazuichi, so be it.

Later that evening, Byakuya made sure to attend. He got there early, making it easier to spot Kazuichi. He was around Gundham and Sonia, who had begun warming up to him. Their eyes locked, Byakuya waved. Kazuichi waved back as he called for him,“Togami! Wait up—”. He ran from his two classmates and to Byakuya. Everyone had gotten dressed up, Kazuichi in a nice little suit that complimented his hair. He had glasses on this time. “What a surprise!,” he cheered,“I thought you would’ve bailed!”. That was sad to say the least. “How could I do such a thing? I had to come anyway,” Byakuya explained,“Makoto can’t drive...he’s also in the Future Foundation”.

“So I’ve heard. Can I offer you a drink?”

“Why not?”

Byakuya was a pessimist, this we know. He was as pessimistic as they come. Hanging out with Kazuichi was something he told himself wouldn’t be worth his time, but he agreed, so he had to suck it up. To his surprise, hanging out with him wasn’t so bad. In fact, he’ll never admit it, but Byakuya actually enjoyed Kazuichi’s company. They went for a glass of punch, enjoyed the feast, danced with friends till dawn. Around 4am (because damn, this party was just never gonna end), they took it upon themselves to walk along the beach. As they walked, conversations took place. Byakuya went off on a rant about his limousine life, riding in one everyday and how he feared for his life when doing so. His limo made a sound that sounded as if it were going to fall apart any time soon.

“It was a scratching noise against the asphalt and absolutely terrorized me as a child. To this day, I won’t enter a limousine. I just can’t”

“Scratching? Gee, only thing that comes to mind is the exhaust coming down. Wish I could’ve seen it and told you for sure”

“I still have it in a hidden garage. It’s that valuable”

“Oh, nice! Maybe, I can stop by and see what’s wrong. You’ll have to drive it though”

Byakuya raised a brow. “You’re the mechanic, are you not?,” he asked. Kazuichi laughed nervously, nodding. “See, thing is...I get terribly carsick”. Well, that was new. It was confusing to Byakuya, just as the confusion hit, Kazuichi added:

“Isn’t that funny? The rich guy who’s scared of limos and the mechanic with carsickness”

Byakuya snickered,“Yeah, I guess that’s unheard of”.

They laughed, finding a perfect place to sit down. It was late. Dark and late, the sand was cool against their hands. They took off their shoes, setting them aside. The waves crashes on the shore, “So, what next?,” Kazuichi asked. His voice was softer, Byakuya took notice. “What do you mean?,” he asked. Kazuichi pushed back his hair and shrugged. “I mean, now that we’re all free”. Byakuya took time to give a proper answer, he had a plan.

“Well, for starters, after we finish cleanup, do the very best to rebuild homes. Slowly as we become civilized again, I rebuild the Togami Conglomerate. It’s what my family would’ve wanted and for them, I’d do just about anything” “Wow” “And yourself?”

Kazuichi smiled, facing him. “I’ve been working on blueprints here and there to, get this, introduce new transportation for us all!”. Byakuya shrugged. “You haven’t heard the best part, though,” he added,“You’ll never guess what it is!”.

“Flying car?

“That sounds awesome— No! That’s not it at all!”

“What is it?”

Kazuichi bit back his smile and answered,“A monorail! One that goes super fast! I just know it’s possible! Average monorail? 70 miles per hour, but if I get it right, It could go 200 miles per hour...ore more!”. Now, Byakuya was smiling. “Impressive,” he responded,“It’d be very convenient for people to get around”.

“I’m glad you think so”

Kazuichi faced the ocean, sighing deeply. “I’ve just always wanted to build transportation, really fast ones,” he said,“My old man doubted me, though. He didn’t think it was realistic. He said cars I can do, but never anything past that. Something about cars is all the family knows, I dunno”.

“I think you can do it”

“You’re just saying things—”

“No, I know you can. You have something other geniuses lack. You have the heart. Where there’s heart, there is will”

“That means a lot coming from you”

“Why from me?”

Kazuichi explained that he knows about Byakuya’s family and they didn’t sound any easier, either. “We didn’t have good upbringings,” he said,“But you, you had it so hard. Yet, you overcame all of that shit. If you survived that and all of this, I know you can rebuild your conga line”

“Conglomerate?”

“Yeah, that”

They smiled. “Man to man,” Kazuichi added,“Is settling down in that plan?”. Byakuya hadn’t thought of that at all. Would he even want to settle down? Jesus. That was the last thing he expected to think about. “I’m going to be completely honest with you,” Byakuya answered,“I have no idea. That isn’t something that’s come to mind. While I’d like to have someone to continue my legacy, I just don’t know. Tell me about your plan?”. Kazuichi was confused now, he didn’t think Byakuya was gonna return the question. “I would like to, but who’d love me?,” he muttered. He continued.

“I never had the best luck with women, but then sometimes, I sit and wonder,’Do I really feel this way about women?’ I try to be such a people pleaser, I sometimes don’t even know if I genuinely like something or if I say I do because that’s what’s expected of me and I’ve never told anyone else that, wow”

Byakuya sucked at being comforting, we also know this, but he really wanted to be there for Kazuichi. “I think I’m gay,” Kazuichi blurted, covering his mouth. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that”. Byakuya shook his head,“First of all, congratulations”. Kazuichi couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Second of all, don’t apologize for being truthful to yourself,” he said,“I’m not exactly of heterosexual persuasion either”.

“Oh, thank god. I though I was going to be killed and thrown into the ocean”

“Nah, because who on this island is straight? Absolutely no one”

“You might be right...wow. I’m gay. I’m gay. I’m gaaaayyy”

Byakuya laughed,“Let it out, I guess”. “I’ve just never said that out loud! It feels so freeing!”. Kazuichi stood up and ran to the ocean. At the top of his lungs, he professed his attraction to men. He ran back, only for them to hear someone say. “You love who you love, man, more power to ya!”. They laughed at that moment, laughed so hard their stomach cramped. “Who even was that?,” Kazuichi sobbed.

“I think that might’ve been Yasuhiro”

“O-Oh, at least you know him”

They calmed down, enjoying their time on the sand. “This was fun,” Kazuichi mumbled. “I agree”. He scoot closer to Byakuya, who unknowingly wrapped his arm around his waist. He caressed his sides, softly. Kazuichi lay his head on Byakuya’s shoulder, which he didn’t mind. There was just something really comforting about this. “What’s most important to you in a relationship?,” Kazuichi asked. His voice was still soft, but unlike before, it wasn’t stern or blue. “For both of us to have ambition and goals set,” he answered,“What’s important to you?”.

“I just wanna trust someone. It’s hard for me to trust anyone, really. So as long as I can trust them and they’re kind, that’s all I want”

“Well, I’m a brutally honest cunt”

“I love brutally honest cunts”

He laughed as he continued to rub down his sides. As the saying goes, you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. Plus, tonight was going just great. “Look at me,” Byakuya said. “Hm?”. Kazuichi faced him, only to be grabbed and pulled to Byakuya’s lips. He gasped, a blush coming across his face as Byakuya kissed him ever so tenderly. They pulled away slowly. Kazuichi covered his face, Byakuya reaching for his shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he muttered. “No! Its okay!,” he blurted,“It was more than okay! I-I’ve just never kissed another dude before. Okay, I’ve never actually kissed anyone else”.

“Oh?”

“Well, I have, but not like this”

“I can tell. Your lips, they were so soft and inexperienced. Untouched, I’d say”

As Byakuya said this, he placed his thumb gently on Kazuichi’s lips, sliding it down soft and slowly; he shuddered before he spoke. “I want you to kiss me again,” he muttered against his sliding thumb. “Good”. Kazuichi’s breath hitched as Byakuya grabbed his jaw, gently kissed him. He kissed back now with more readiness, his hand digging into the sand. Byakuya’s hand moved from his jaw to his throat, gripping softly. A sweet moan escaped Kazuichi’s lips, making him bite Byakuya’s bottom lip. He winced, pulling away momentarily. “Sorry,” he whispered. Byakuya reassured him it was okay, but Kazuichi shook his head. “Let me kiss it better,” he cooed, pushing Togami on his back. Soda straddled him, pecking his lower lip.

Now, Byakuya was blushing.

“Ah, don’t hate me, but I kinda drew blood”

“You? Withdraw blood? With those teeth? Also unheard of”

“Hey! Shut up about my teeth”

“I like your teeth”

“I like you”

“Really? Prove yourself truthful”

“Say less”

“WHAT THE FUCK”

Soda quickly got off of Togami, who sat up just as fast. There stood Hiyoko, Mahiru, Ibuki, and Mikan. “Hey girls!,” Kazuichi waved,“Togami was just helping me find my glasses. We found them know, so there’s no need to worry”. “Oh don’t worry, we were just on our way to the cabins,” Mahiru explained. “What goes on in the cabins stays in the cabins! Wooho- ouch!”. Hiyoko acting as if she didn’t just nudge the fuck out of Ibuki. “Y-You know, if you two are going to, uhm, continue what you were d-doing here,” Mikan began to suggest,“Maybe you c-could go get a cabin too. The others are headed over here”. Kazuichi looked at Byakuya, who nodded. “Okay then! Let’s go!”.

So there they were, following the girls to the cabins. “I say we go to mine, just to be safe,” Kazuichi explained,“Besides, I got to clean up. It looks greats now”. Byakuya just nodded, he couldn’t utter a word. For some reason, his heart was pounding out of his chest. The girl’s split from them, giggling as they entered their room. “Home sweet home,” Kazuichi said as he opened the door. They stepped in, Kazuichi locking it. He had turned the lights on, but once he jumped on his bed, Byakuya turned them off. “Oh, you’re straight to the point, aren’t you?,” Kazuichi teased as he held his arms open for Byakuya to crawl in. He did just that, kissing him all over. He focused on his lips for about 30 seconds, before moving on to his neck, and finally he unbuttoned his shirt a little to kiss along his chest. Feeling his shirt unbutton, Kazuichi took it upon himself to do the same to Byakuya, except unbuttoning it all.

“Togami..

“Yeah?”

“Lay down”

“Alright”

Byakuya lay down as Kazuichi got between his legs, hands on his belt buckle. “Can I...?”. Byakuya nodded, giving Kazuichi permission to take it off. Carefully, he slid off his jeans and briefs, exposing his pale cock. At that point, it was quite obvious that Kazuichi had no idea as to what he was doing and supposed to do. He began by grabbing his cock, licking at his tip a little, stroking him. Byakuya snickered as Kazuichi’s eyes met his, but breathed deeply. He put his mouth over it, bobbing his head, accidentally hitting his throat. He gagged, but not loudly. Byakuya played with his hair, not yet grabbing it. “Take your time,” he comforted,“I want you to enjoy this as much as I am...Fuck~ you’re doing so well”.

Kazuichi was really, really struggling. He had to think back to the most realistic porno he’s ever seen. What were these people doing that he hasn’t? Try being sloppy maybe? Cursing himself for his lack of education in gay sex (well, actually, just sex in general), he worked with what he knew. The last thing he wanted was to embarrass himself. Little did he know, he was actually putting Byakuya on edge. Byakuya hardly cursed and when he did, it was for good reason. Like right now, Kazuichi was giving him the sloppiest head in that moment. He was doing so well, Byakuya became fixated his mouth. Something about his mouth drove him insane.

And then there was Kazuichi, still believing he was doing terrible. His thoughts were racing.

I know I’m doing something wrong...

Is he even enjoying it?

God, I’m so out of his league...

Maybe if I just spit...

What would my dad think of this? Wait, my dad’s dead—

Kazuichi allowed himself to drool all over his cock. Byakuya moaned, pushing his head back. “No more, I’m so close...,” he gasped,“I’d prefer to finish elsewhere...”. Kazuichi’s stomach sank. “O-Oh,” he stuttered,“Okay, I guess I’ll just lay down”. Byakuya got in between his legs now, removing his jeans amd boxers, examining him, realizing he’d look better completely nude. Kazuichi shivered, which he also took note of. “Let me pull a bedsheet over us,” he said,“You look cold”. “Thank you,” Kazuichi muttered as Byakuya fumbled for the covers.

“Better?”

“Still a little chilly”

“Okay, Uhm- how about now?”

Byakuya held Kazuichi with his arms wrapped around him, bare chests making contact. “Feels so nice,” he mumbled. Byakuya placed a kiss on his chest before warning him about prep.

“Please be gentle”

“I will be, just relax. Breathe”

Kazuichi was shaking at this point, he was so nervous and didn’t know why. Byakuya held him tightly, stopping himself from entering even a finger in the guy. “You’re shaking,” he noted,“Is everything okay?”. Kazuichi nodded, explaining,“This is my first time, I just want you to be gentle”. Byakuya helped him work on his breathing. He placed a warm hand on his chest, making sure his heart rate slows down. “There,” he whispered,“I’m gonna go slow”. Kazuichi nodded, bracing himself.

Prep wasn’t actually bad?

He took Byakuya’s first two fingers well, but then the third one made him whine (and cry a little). Nonetheless, he just wanted to get it over with. The pain had gone away once Byakuya had curled his fingers a few times. Kazuichi made small noises as he took his fingers, whining when pulled out. With his other hand, he cupped Kazuichi’s jaw, but slowly slit it down to his throat. Kazuichi gasped as he felt Byakuya’s grip tighten. “I’m going to ruin you ever so softly,” he whispered,“Understood?”.

“Yes...”

“Good”

Byakuya took his cock out, placing Kazuichi’s legs on his shoulders. Still tight, he groaned as he pushed in. “Ah! Fuck...”. Along with being filled by Byakuya’s cock, the grip on his throat remained, sending a wave of pleasure through him. Byakuya kept his thrusts slow, just like be promised. “I-Is this okay?,” Byakuya managed.

“Harder”

“I just started. D-Don’t you want to ease into it first”

“No, just— please. Also...”

Kazuichi moved his hand to Byakuya’s choking hand, pressing it down harder against him. “What you’re asking for could hurt you, um...Are you sure?,” Byakuya asked. Kazuichi nodded, fisting Byakuya’s hair and pulling him in for a heated kiss. In response, Byakuya only thrust harder into him. He knew he wouldn’t last long, seeing Kazuichi’s already fucked out face. Each thrust only made his blush deepen and his stomach acids find new ways to make him feel sick. Byakuya came to the realization that his cock already had the guy in shambles and in a trance, almost. He was making him feel good, but he knew that he wasn’t exactly fucking him the way he should be fucked, deserves to be fucked. He wasn’t hitting his sweet spot just right, Byakuya taking it upon himself to experiment with his thrusts.

“Ngh! Hey, why’d you stop doing that? It felt— Ah!”

Found it.

Byakuya tried thrusting with his cock in that angle, but realized it was harder in this position. “Ass up,” he sighed, slightly out of breath. Kazuichi didn’t hesitate whatsoever, immediately laying on his stomach with his ass in the air. Sure, he already felt weak in his knees, but that wouldn’t stop him from letting Byakuya do him the way he was about to.

It didn’t take long for Byakuya to rediscover this new spot, hitting it repeatedly. Kazuichi dug his face into the soft, white pillows; practically screaming as he was unraveling underneath Byakuya. His whines were perpetual and if you listened closely, you could hear exactly what he was saying in a quiet breath.

“Yesyesyes, oh! Please don’t stop now pleasepleaseplease I can’t take it anymore, Ah! I love you, I love you so much, I really love you, o-oh thank you..”

Byakuya smiled at his low, yet raspy words. I love you? “How cute,” he muttered, pulling his messy pink hair back. Kazuichi’s hand shook as he moved it too his leaking cock. “I’m close, Togami, please don’t stop”. Byakuya snickered,“I don’t plan on it”. Gently, he shoved his head back down onto the pillow, also nearing his high. Without warning, Byakuya came after a few thrusts. Feeling his warmth, Kazuichi came right after. He collapsed onto the mattress, head in the pillows and trying his very best to catch his breath. As he took deep breaths, Byakuya smiled as his fingers walked up the blushing boy’s back, tracing small circles and figure eights.

“You’re too kind”

“You deserve it,” Byakuya whispered, placing a hand on Kazuichi’s hip and kissing up and down his back (and to his neck). Kazuichi turned around, Byakuya getting to kiss his stomach a few times before being pulled up by Kazuichi. “Ah!”. He laughed as he held Byakuya tighter, nuzzling him. Byakuya may have been taller, but Kazuichi was definitely stronger.

“Gotcha”

Byakuya would be annoyed, but not when Kazuichi has the goofiest and most smug look on his face. Eventually he let him go, laying by him. Kazuichi’s hair was ruined by their little night Basically, he ended up with his tiny braid undone. Kazuichi twirled his excess hair in between his fingers. “Oh- Allow me,” Byakuya said, finding the rubber band used to fasten the hair, braiding. Kazuichi’s eyes stared at him lovingly, watching Byakuya put his glasses back on just to redo his braid. “Annnnnd...done”. Byakuya rubbed his chest before reaching for the the ground and picking up his briefs, putting them back on. He tossed Kazuichi his boxers.

“Thanks”

“Of course”

They lay next to each other, Kazuichi playing with Byakuya’s hair. “I’m so glad I met you,” Byakuya admitted. “Ditto”. Byakuya grabbed his chin, pulling him in for a slow, passionate kiss. Suddenly, the door creaked open, but two girls rush in, already fondling each other.

“Excited, aren’t you?”

“Why wouldn’t I be when you look so—”

Kazuichi and Byakuya stared at the two women, who awkwardly stared back.

“Togami?”

“Fukawa?...WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH NAEGI’S SISTER?”

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THE MECHANIC?”

“I won’t say anything if you don’t”

“Sounds good to me! Come on, Komaru”

The girls ran out, thus allowing Kazuichi and Byakuya to finish their little makeout session. Eventually, it tired them out, sleeping in each other’s arms. Before sleep, Byakuya wondered something, but decided it could wait. The next morning, Kazuichi woke up first, planting a small kiss on Byakuya’s lips. As his eyes fluttered open, Kazuichi gasped. “My prince has finally awoken”.

“Silly”

“I know”

Byakuya kissed him properly, getting up to bathe. Upon entering the shower, he heard the door open. “Can I join?!”. Byakuya invited him in, closing the shower door. “Did you want something before we go?,” Byakuya asked, making Kazuichi blush. “Uh, no, um...did you?”. Byakuya shook his head.

“I just wanted to shower with you”

“I see. Help me with my hair, I’ll help you with yours”

Kazuichi nodded, grabbing the shampoo and lathering it into his hair. It didn’t take long to add in the conditioner in too since his hair was short. Now, Byakuya got to Kazuichi’s hair. He took care of Kazuichi, being less awkward about washing him up. It’s not that Kazuichi wasn’t into helping him, he was insecure about touching him. He wanted to do it right, sometimes doubting himself and what he was doing. Byakuya on the other hand, was confident in what he was doing as he massaged Kazuichi’s scalp whilst washing him. “Did you mean it?”.

“Mean what?”

“Last night while I was destroying you from the inside out—”

“Of course”

“—you said you loved me....well, did you mean it? I know people say things they don’t mean in a state of bliss, but-”

“Togami, I meant every word”

Byakuya’s heart skipped a beat as Kazuichi spoke. “If you mean it, tell me right now that you love me,” he ordered. “I love you, Togami. Do you love me?”. Byakuya held onto him, hugging him tightly. “Well, I guess this is my answer,” Kazuichi laughed,“Hey— Are you crying?”. Obviously crying, (because he was emotional for some reason) Byakuya backed away.

“Of course not! Me? Crying? No, never!”

“I love you”

“I love you too”

“Was this too fast?”

“What? You’re telling me you don’t believe in love at first sight?”

“I guess I do”

They finished up their shower and got dressed, heading out. Everyone had already met up at the dock. “Jesus, where the hell were you two?!,” Makoto asked, genuinely concerned. “Yeah, we were about to go search,” Hajime added. “I was helping Kazuichi pack something. I saw him struggle in his room with it,” Byakuya said, calmly. Kazuichi just went along with it. “Yeah, my tools wouldn’t pack well,” he explained,“Togami was just helping me stuff everything into my toolbox”. A low mutter was heard, but you’d have to be close enough to understand it.

“Yeah, right. That toolbox wasn’t the only thing Byakuya was stuffing...—”

“FUKAWA!”

“Alright! That does it for the headcount!,” Makoto announced,“Let’s get going. We have a rebuilt city to settle into!”. As everyone cheered on boarded the boat with their own individual classes, Byakuya rushed closer to Kazuichi. “Will I see you again?,” Kazuichi asked.

“Soon. May I kiss you goodbye, or would that be too much a cliche?”

“Yeah, but I love cliches. All the best movies have ‘em”

“So do I”

They kissed tenderly, Byakuya holding his waist. They pulled away, smiling. “See ya around,” Kazuichi mumbled. “Goodbye, Souda”.

[just2bubbly]

Longings and Comm

Masterlist

Summary

"I swear if I could come, I would have been near you in a heartbeat."

Absence always seems to make the heart grow fonder and Cinder and Kai are no different in this vast expanse. After a busy day at work with Lunars, Cinder relies on Kai to make her smile but what happens when unexpected inquiries are made and feelings are slipped off.

Ship: Kaider

Words: 1502 words

__

Cinder's Perspective

She was so done with everyone. Every single one of them and this headache was killing her and unlike her usual headaches caused as a result of grief. This one was a real fucking headache caused because of annoyance and extreme anger.

She did something very un-queenly, like shouting in her chambers with a colourful string of swear words going in her mind.

1.2.3.4

Like every meeting that had ever happened, this was nothing different. Well, except for the appearances of lunar aristocrats. As if the stars surrounding her knew exactly what she wanted, Kai commed with such perfect timings that she wondered if Iko was behind this. If she was, may God bless her best friend, her only true companion on this entire dreary planet.

"Thank Goodness you commed. I am so angry-"

He chuckled at her loud outburst, mildly interrupting her. She would have glared if it was anyone else but Kai. However, the voice of his chuckle was enough to calm her down.

"Welcome to Royalty Queen Selene!"

"Stop saying it as if I have won a lottery ticket to visit Earth"

"So is that what you are missing? Earth?" he asked with a smirk tugging at his lips.

"You would know," she said, awaiting him to smile one of those shy smiles reserved for her.

"Kai! I miss Earth and people who can't perform bio-electric manipulation. Heck, you don't know how lucky you are! "

"Why?" he asked, his eyebrows quirking as his curiosity peeked in.

"Well, there are many reasons..." she was going to narrate each one of it to him unless he said otherwise.

Noting her long pause for permission, he granted, "Start Cinder, I'm all ears for you today."

'Ah! This guy was too good for his own self' she seemed to exclaim inside her head.

"Let's start then. I would say sit down as there is a long list of reasons. Firstly, these obnoxious Lunars- they are obsessed with fashion and by fashion, I mean an eerie sense of fashion. My eyes are hurt by just looking at them and that's not my individual statement, even Iko agrees. Plus, my cybernetics and the device goes haywire on me trying to pinpoint their true looks every time I glance at them; making it extremely difficult to focus. Secondly, their love to change appearances, like someone might be having blonde hair today and tomorrow they might turn out bald or something like that. I have a hard time remembering people, providing that I have cybernetics it is saying something. I can look through their glamour and see their true appearances but even then I have a hard time recalling them like hell, Luna needs some form of a database so that I or the computer in my brain can memorize all of them. At least earthen leaders have the decency to come dressed up in proper attire. Lunars, one man showed up in pyjamas to the cabinet meetings." She huffed and stopped to catch her breath.

Seeing that she was somewhat done with her ramble for the day, she groaned for what felt like the umpteenth time in the day.

"You have it bad, Cin, I absolutely agree but c'mon you have me and other people to complain to. Besides, how are you?"

"Yeah, I'm good. Sorry to waste your time with my problems. I should not rant like this but my aristocrat citizens are chaotic and useless who loathe agreeing with me." She grumbled.

"You are not alone actually. Vargas and Camilla gave me a headache today but thanks to you I at least have one thing less to worry about"

"And that is?" she inquired.

"Letumosis and Levana, Cinder. How do you seem to forget that you are the revolutionary?" he teasingly asked. It was not like she was fetching compliments just because she was the one who killed Levana. The fact that she was the revolutionary often slipped from her mind if not for Thorne's remarks and a few graceful acknowledgements here and there.

"My court tells me otherwise!"

"Don't listen to those lunar fools, Cinder. You are THE revolutionary. Hero of the entire universe-"

"Stop praising me like some goddess" she cut off him shortly before he decided to go into a full-blown speech about how wonderful she was. Believe her; he had done that at the last annual Peace ball before everyone.

"Besides Emperor how could you call lunars fools before the Queen of Luna? You have lost your fine touch of diplomacy Kaito."

"Well just the way you called them and I quote 'obnoxious Lunars' before a few moments. And don't you worry I'm not losing my fine diplomatic touch anytime sooner. "He joked along.

"Good, it would be a shame if you did." She exclaimed adding to their playful banter.

Soon they fell into a comfortable silence. She had forgotten about her worries, for the time being, thanks to Kai and his very charismatic personality.

"How are you?"

"Uh?" he looked confused because of her out of the blue question.

"I meant how you are doing, like not the meetings and world leaders but just you!" she clarified. It was not likely of Cinder to generally indulge in talking about emotions with anyone. However, Kai had patiently listened to her ramble so she could hear his inner turmoil if any as well.

"Oh," He said for having nothing else to say. Taking his time to answer, he sighed, "I am good, maybe. I dunno, I have never been asked about just myself like this before. I am satisfied with my lot but responsibilities make me jittery. Even then I have Torin who assists me, I am so thankful for having him. Other than that I have a sickening feeling every time I have to attend meetings with world leaders. Yet I am happier in my place than ever before. I know this sounds weird and unintelligible- " He inhaled sharply, stopping in his track, bitting onto his lips.

"Don't worry, Kai. I completely understand the feeling." She assured him. He had completely moved into pessimism within few seconds. Behind the glorious facade of being royalty, sadness and despair are what remains hidden for a long time. Cinder completely understood how it felt to have everything yet feel unhappy about something that you could never have.

She had missed his moist copper-brown eyes but his swiftly moving to rub away the moisture from them did not go unnoticed.

"Hey, it's okay, Kai," she consoled.

She said in a comforting voice, wishing to be near him and just hug him tightly while he cries his heart out.

"No, no. I'm sorry I just feel like crap for a few days and I miss you." He mumbled, his voice becoming husky,

"I miss you too, Kai. I swear if I could come, I would have been near you in a heartbeat." She said, as her synthetic heart continued to long to touch him.

There was some commotion on his end.

"Your Majesty" someone called for him.

"Cinder, I'm sorry to end on a sad note but I have to go. I am fine, don't worry, I will call you tomorrow or maybe tonight, what time is it?" he asked.

"It's 2200 here."

"Okay, so I will call you tomorrow without fail, but sorry now that I have to leave. I am sorry to sadden you with all my feelings-"

"Stop apologizing, Kai. It's completely fine. Besides, it's okay to let it out from time to time."

He was called urgently by someone in the background; making him quicken his pace as he mumbled incoherent words to her.

"I miss you, call you back later. Love-" he said as the comm was ended by him. He had failed to complete his sentence and she contemplated if she should comm him again just to hear him finish his words. However, that would be a foolish thing to do when he seemed to be in so much hurry.

"Love you too, Kai." She said for the ears who would not hear it.

__

A/N: This was supposed to be fluff, but things took a new turn and I could not undo it. To be honest, I can't imagine Kai and Cinder going through their two years apart relationship without slipping 'I miss you' in  any and every conversations.

Your views will be very much appreciated! Be sure to like, reblog and comment if you like it! Tell me if you wanna be tagged!

[clumsyclifford]

“I got my ass kicked but you held the ice” jalex?

sure thing, anon. i've been watching a lot of bones lately so maybe that explains...i dunno. the vibe here.

tw for minor blood & injuries, mentions of alcohol

read here on ao3

-

There’s blood on Jack’s face.

“Jesus Christ, what happened to you?” feels like the right first question.

Jack staggers into the open seat across from Alex. “Got slugged.”

“You sound proud.”

“I am.”

“But you’re bleeding,” Alex says, aghast. He’s out of his seat and sliding in beside Jack before he can even really think. “Why— why are you bleeding? From getting punched?”

Jack shrugs and winces. Alex looks closer, hesitant to touch him. “Dude had rings or something. Hurt like a bitch.”

“You got scratched,” Alex says. Even he can hear the concern seeping into his voice, but if Jack notices he doesn’t seem to care. “Jack, you should clean this. We— you should let me clean this.”

“No, it’s cool.”

“Uh, I actually wasn’t giving you the option,” Alex says. He wraps an arm around Jack’s forearm and pulls him out of the booth. The seating area is far enough from the bar that Alex can justify somehow missing whatever scuffle Jack got into when he was supposedly getting them both drinks, but he wishes he hadn’t. Trust Jack to get into a fight the moment he’s left to his own devices.

“This isn’t necessary,” Jack says once they’ve reached the bathroom, though he’s letting Alex manhandle him anyway, which Alex appreciates. On account of the fact that it feels extremely necessary.

“You’re fucking bleeding from your face, I’m pretty sure you’re not supposed to do that,” says Alex, casting a glance around for anything to wash Jack’s face off with.

“And I’m supposed to bleed from other places?”

“No! No places.” Alex hits him on the arm. “No bleeding at all. Wanna tell me what happened? You were gone for like five minutes. I thought you were getting another round.”

“I was.”

Alex raises his eyebrows expectantly. “Well you obviously didn’t succeed, so what the fuck gives?”

“Got into a fight,” Jack says.

“That’s unlike you.”

“Do not use your fucking shirt to clean my bloody face,” Jack says, ignoring Alex, and Alex stalls in his motion lifting the hem of his shirt.

“Why not?”

“Oh my God, think rationally? You’ll ruin your shirt?”

“You got into a bar fight and you’re telling me to think rationally?”

“It hardly counts as a bar fight,” Jack says, and then sighs heavily. “Use mine. It’s black, it won’t show up, and I’m pretty sure there’s blood on it already anyway.”

Alex presses his lips together and frowns. The blood on Jack’s face isn’t really dripping. “How could there be blood on your shirt?”

Jack lifts his shoulders, shrugging off his leather jacket into Alex’s outstretched hand. “Dude pushed me.”

“...You said he punched you.”

“He did. And then pushed me, you know, with his fists, you know.”

“So he punched you again.”

“No, no, he—” Jack frowns. “I don’t know, who cares?”

“Me! I care! Who the fuck did you fight with? And why? And can I kill him?”

“No, it was stupid, and it doesn’t matter,” Jack says. “Answered your questions in reverse order.” He crosses his arms across his chest and tugs his shirt up over his head, offering it up to Alex inside-out.

“Well, at least you recognize that it was stupid,” Alex mutters. He steers Jack towards the sink counter. “Sit.”

“Come on,” Jack complains. “This is ridiculous. It’s just blood.”

“Everything you say makes me more worried about your well-being. Do you have no sense of self-preservation? Can I never actually leave you alone again?”

“It’s blood, I’ve bled a million times,” Jack says, exasperated. “And for the record, it was noble.”

“Really? Or was it stupid?”

“Can’t it have been both?” Jack sighs, and tilts his head back to look at the ceiling.

Alex grabs his chin and pulls his head back down. “Maybe. Can’t make a judgement until I know what you got into a fight about. And you have to look at me so I can clean your fucking face, which is bleeding, which is generally regarded as bad.”

“Sorry, mom.”

Alex runs Jack’s shirt under the faucet until it’s soaked through. He wrings out the excess water. “Sit still.”

“Okay, mom.”

Alex rolls his eyes. If it gets Jack to listen, Alex will accept being called mom. He’d like to think that cleaning a friend’s injuries is a thing that any decent human being would do, not just a mother. Not that it really matters. The point is it’s an Alex thing that he’s now doing for Jack.

It’s not something he’d ever anticipated doing. Jack’s not the type to get into fights. He’s a little bit of a thrill-seeker, sure, but he’s not an idiot. Which is why Alex really does kind of believe the fight may have been noble. Jack wouldn’t pick a fight for a stupid reason, but for a noble reason? Sure. Why not.

Jack hisses as Alex starts dabbing the wet t-shirt at his bloody face. His jaw tenses under Alex’s fingertips until finally he mutters, “Okay, ow, stop, stop it, that really hurts, can’t I do it myself?”

Alex’s hand drops from Jack’s face. “I’ll be more careful.”

“You’re not the problem. It’s— I got fucking decked. Everything hurts.” Jack casts a sidelong glance at Alex and exhales loudly. “Give me your hand, I’ll just do the squeeze-when-it-hurts thing.”

Alex offers up his left hand. “You sure?”

Their fingers interlace. Jack nods slowly. “Yeah. Go. I did this to myself.”

“Technically speaking, that dude you fought with did this to you,” Alex mumbles absently as he resumes his task. Jack groans and his grip on Alex’s hand becomes viselike. Alex does what he can, but it’s hard without another hand to keep Jack’s head stable. It’s also hard when his hand is being literally crushed.

“Ow,” Alex says, snatching his hand away. “Jesus, JB, you’ve got a fucking grip.”

“Sorry.”

“I need this hand,” Alex says, semi-apologetically. He’d be more apologetic if Jack hadn’t just been liquifying the bones in his hand. “You keep moving.”

“I’m not trying to.”

“No, I know that. I just—”

“Okay, it’s fine,” Jack mutters. “It’s fine.���

As delicately as he can manage it, Alex settles his fingers along Jack’s jaw, tilting his head in the most convenient direction. Jack continues bemoaning how painful this is, and Alex tunes it out. If it gets desperate, he’s sure Jack will hit him or something.

No assault occurs. Alex gets all of the blood off Jack’s face without further incident. “Okay,” he finally breathes. The sigh of relief that escapes Jack makes his posture fall. Slumped over with his elbows on his knees, he looks suddenly exhausted.

“I think that hurt more than being punched.”

“I doubt it,” Alex says. He rubs a sympathetic hand over Jack’s shoulders. They’re secluded, as much as they can be in the bathroom of a bar. Underwater by the way the walls muffle the music and chatter. Dim light washes over Jack. “Let’s go home.”

“No, we don’t have to.”

“I’m ready to leave and I think you are too.”

“Sorry,” Jack says quietly. “I wasn’t trying to ruin the night.”

“You didn’t.”

“We were just supposed to be getting a drink.”

“I have to say, I think I’m more impressed that you got into a fight while mostly sober.”

“I think I regret it.” Jack winces and curls further into himself. “And now I’m also cold.”

“Here,” Alex says, tugging his arms out of his flannel. “We can go back to my place. Watch a movie. Throw your bloody shirt into the laundry.”

“I’m sorry,” Jack says again.

Alex shakes his head. “I’m sure you had your reasons.”

“It was stupid.”

“You know, I want to believe that, but I just don’t,” Alex says, sighing deeply. “I actually believe it was infuriatingly noble, because you are just that kind of person.”

Jack glances at Alex as he begins buttoning up the flannel. Looks back at the floor. “I don’t know if it was noble. I could have left it alone. That would’ve been the smart thing to do.”

“Hey, I didn’t say it was smart. I’m sure it wasn’t.” Alex squeezes Jack’s knee and Jack looks up at him, surprised at the gesture. A small, almost indiscernible smile tugs at his lips.

“Some creep at the bar hitting on the bartender,” he admits. “Being really gross, really loud. Clearly making her uncomfortable. I said I was her boyfriend. Told him to back off. Guy didn’t like that.” He shrugs. “I pushed him, he punched me. Guess that was cause enough to get him kicked out. I mean, they should probably have kicked me out, too, but…the bartender seemed grateful.”

A soft smile crosses Alex’s face despite himself. “So I was right. It was noble.”

“Worth it,” Jack mumbles. “I hate creepy guys in bars. Ruining the experience for all of us. And look, I get hitting on a bartender, but don’t push it when she says no, you know? Anyway. I’d do it again.”

Alex reaches up and flips the collar of the flannel down, and his eyes meet Jack’s. “Did you get her number?”

Jack looks confused. “I didn’t want it. I was just being decent, you know.”

“Oh.” That’s new. Jack loves to collect phone numbers. Feeds his ego or something.

“‘Oh,’ what?”

“No, nothing, I’m just surprised,” Alex says, adjusting the collar. Jack shifts his shoulders. “You’re usually all over that shit.”

“Yeah, well. I’m…otherwise preoccupied. Not interested in a random hookup.”

“What?” Alex fakes a gasp, pretends to be positively scandalized. “What have you done with Jack Barakat?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“Well? Preoccupied with who? I won’t tell.”

“That’s true, you won’t,” Jack says. “Because I’m not telling you.”

“What? Jack! I swear.”

“It’s not that I think you’re going to tell anyone,” Jack says, rolling his eyes and his sleeves. “What are we, eleven? I just don’t want to say. It’s complicated. I’m still thinking about it.”

Alex squints. “Someone I know?”

“Declining to answer any of your questions starting now.”

“Sure, sure. But is it someone I know?”

“Alex.”

“Okay, fine,” Alex says. “Don’t tell me.”

“Same page,” Jack says dryly, gesturing between them. Alex steps away and gives Jack a critical once-over.

“Let’s go home,” he says. “You should put ice on that.”

Jack slides off the sink counter. “Yeah. Okay. Let’s go.”

They’d anticipated being drunk on the way home, so they have to catch a cab. Jack winces when he thinks Alex isn’t looking, and Alex does him the courtesy of pretending not to see. It’s not until they’re back at Alex’s apartment, under the bright living room lights, that the bruise on Jack’s face becomes apparent.

Even Alex winces. “Oh, shit,” he says. He reaches for Jack without thinking and only stops himself just before his fingers graze Jack’s face. “That’s…damn. That’s a shiner.”

“Thank you,” Jack says. “People find this kind of thing hot, right?”

“Uh, damaged people, I guess,” Alex says. Like he’s not, at that exact moment, trying to suppress the thought that it is hot. So is Jack in his flannel. Alex already knows he’s damaged.

“Cool,” Jack says.

Alex wraps an ice pack from the freezer in a dish towel — not that anyone’s counting, but he’s fairly certain it belongs to Rian — and brings it back to the couch. The TV is on. Jack is flicking through titles on Netflix.

“Here,” says Alex. He sits next to Jack and Jack makes as if to take the ice pack, but Alex shakes his head. “I’ve got it.”

“You don’t have to. I’m a big boy. I can hold my own ice pack.”

“I know,” Alex says. He can’t quite figure out why he’s so dead set on doing it anyway, but Jack must read it in his tone, because he turns back to the TV without arguing.

“What are we watching?”

“Dunno, what’s on?”

“The entire Netflix library.”

“A constantly-changing selection,” says Alex, and braces the back of Jack’s head with his free hand. Jack leans into the touch. “Criminal Minds?”

“Great choice,” Jack says. He flinches when Alex holds the ice to his face, but only for a second. Alex is steady and then Jack is too. The Criminal Minds cover fills the TV screen. “Not a movie, but arguably better.”

“I don’t think that’s arguable,” Alex says quietly. Even with the dish towel, the ice is starting to make Alex’s hand cold. He doesn’t mention it.

Jack hits play on whatever episode of the show has come up. They’ve both watched this show all the way through, but it’s nice to have a show like that to share. On the one hand, neither of them ever tire of it. On the other, they’ve seen it all before, which means they don’t have to become invested or pay close attention.

Jack leans into Alex as the episode starts. Alex’s arm wraps around Jack’s shoulders. They stay that way until the episode ends, and Alex would call it convenient for holding the ice pack, but he sets the ice pack down about six minutes in, whispering that he can’t feel his fingers.

In response, Jack sandwiches Alex’s hand between his own without a word. Alex doesn’t say anything.

He sort of doesn’t think he needs to.

[grandinventor]

At the risk of sounding like a Jindosh apologist here (I am.) I will preface that Jindosh is a bad guy, he has either killed people personally or got them killed for experiment purposes by his Clockworks and has dissected the dead so he is not good, he is a villain, I acknowledge that.

Now with that out of the way I wanna criticize the narrative surrounding him and his mansion and how it sometimes falls flat on it’s face trying to demonize them thanks to a lot of points my friend @divaythfyr​ brought up. I’ll put all of that below the cut:

Yesterday I was told this line and I won’t lie it is...bad. Line in question: 

Billie: "His home is supposed to be full of marvels. Locals go in as a test of courage, or because they're desperate for a meal. Kids, even. People say you can hear them at night, pounding on the windows, calling for help."

But because I couldn’t live with the idea that he kills children you know the simplest villain demonization tactic in writing history (kick the puppy, kick the child whatever) and I think it’s pretty cheap to try and make him worse than Sokolov, I talked to the Jindosh apologist committee and thot about it so I’ll go over this line by line. 

1. "His home is supposed to be full of marvels.“ - Okay but isn’t his home also supposed to be scary? Isn’t the whole “Why would anyone build a scary mansion like this?” line from Emily/Corvo as they enter supposed to tell us that this is a scary place? Which is funny because in reality the mansion itself isn’t scary at all, in fact it’s extremely logical in the way it unfolds and exposes the rooms. It’s perfectly functional and as someone with a major in architecture, I can say it’s the best designed house in terms of organization in the game. There is no way to die in the mansion unless the Clockwork Soldiers and the guards get you - which goes for literally any important/rich person’s house? You walk in someone’s house uninvited and their guards get you. You can die if you get behind the walls but it’s extremely difficult to do so especially in the places where you can get squished. The house itself is completely harmless. So the whole idea from Jindosh’s end that it’s a maze is stupid on it’s own too, the house is perfectly logical and Stilton’s manor is an actual maze because I got lost 10 times in there. 

2. “Locals go in as a test of courage, or because they're desperate for a meal.“ - okay first part is correct people go in his house to either steal, test their skills or kill him. He says as much himself. He says fabled thieves and assassins died there. Again probably from his guards and Clockworks since you can’t die from the house in any rational way. And then he dragged them half dead or dead in his lab to dissect them. He has a fascination with watching people die because he is like evil and a villain like that. Which brings me to the next point which is:

There are only two ways to get in his mansion without powers. There is the bridge below which is broken and the railway which is guarded and has a Wall of Light on the other end. So how will anyone that is not prepared with a grappling hook or some kind of way to close this gap gonna get in? How is your random average person gonna go in? And most importantly why? Do people just walk in aristocrat’s houses and expect not to get out in a body bag or? 

Besides he has a) a lot of free food and drinks in the lobby which is his threshold as to how far you are allowed to go so if someone wanted food they can just walk in and take it and leave (after you know, scaling a mountain for whatever reason because there aren’t easier houses to steal from) and b) he has an audiograph, because I am sure he assumes people can’t read, which tells you “Do not enter or you will die and I will dissect your remains and this is a promise.” Like why add a warning if you wanna lure people in? Unless those people think they can outsmart him so they come with intent and not just because they need food/shelter. Also he has food right next to that audio. 

3. “Kids, even.“ - okay this one, the scary line. I won’t lie this made me uncomfortable. So like if we assume that normal people can enter by normal means (which in point 2 is clear they can’t unless further elaborated by the game on How? and Why?), a child going in as a dare and dying is possible. Billie after this line goes on to say that she saw a child dare his brother to touch the wall of light which vaporized the child, so the implication is possible. It’s possible a child went in his mansion as a dare and bad things unfolded. It’s also equally possible that it didn’t. We know of adult men dying because we see the bodies. For this one is just a rumor. You can take it either way depending on how you feel about Jindosh. It’s very unlikely a child would get this far though, unless this was some kind of Disney movie. Also Jindosh wouldn’t personally have a reason to kill a child you know, like I know it’s the easiest “this villain is super evil!!!!” writing tactic, but he had a pretty shitty childhood, he felt hated by his mother and probably wasn’t treated so nicely by his (bastard) brother. He likes to exercise his lack of control during his younger years by having control over other people through his house and toying with them. He is very childish in a sense too (with his toy house and toy soldiers), and because of all of this I truly don’t think he would kill a child. He wants a real challenge and to test out his machines and his house against the best and smartest Karnaca can offer, not children. Though my opinion here can be highly biased. 

Also many children can casually pull 6ft tall levers I’m sure--

4.  “People say you can hear them at night, pounding on the windows, calling for help." - we know people have died in the mansion and they have been crying for release, as he says so himself. But again the above points kind of challenge as to who these people that died inside were. However because you know I’ve been playing with his mansion for four years cause I am a dumb hoe, I can say that there are very little windows. In fact the majority of windows that aren’t blocked off by the cliff or the mechanisms are around his laboratory.

 Now yes people could go there and bang on them sure. But they literally...face the lab and chances are no one is gonna hear you bang on that side. The other windows not facing the lab are in the foyer where...you are allowed to be and nothing is gonna happen to you. 

And the windows that actually face a side where let’s say someone could hear if someone was banging are the windows on the front of the house. Only the thing is, there are no windows on the front of the house except in the foyer. 

Here are the buildings from across his mansion which I guess can maybe hear if someone was banging on the windows. But again no windows on the front of the house. 

The fake windows is where the mechanism for the ceiling over the gallery in the upper hall is. The one that kinda extends and unfolds from there. So isn’t entirely possible that the banging and screaming or whatever people heard is just...the mechanisms of his house? The scary evil child killing house? Which is actually moving and making a lot of noise at all times?

So in conclusion? Yes, Jindosh is bad, he has no regard to human life, he divides society as innocent bystanders and criminals. He does dream of an army of Clockwork Soldiers to eradicate all crime. Be, he isn’t a senseless killer, it’s his neutrality and fascination with death as well as his black and white thinking that makes him dangerous. He doesn’t see people as human. In the majority of cases we know of (except one for some reason? That cursed baker who got his brain fried why did you have to do that Jindosh!?) he experiments on people who he deems criminals without sympathy. Also in situations where he thinks it’s justified - breaking in to steal from him or hurt him, the Blade Verbena, prisoners that can actually provide a learning experience for his Clockworks and Sokolov. He doesn’t go kidnapping people off the streets to experiment on them. 

And despite his evilness being completely logical, the whole game tries to paint his mansion as this big puzzle and trap when in reality it’s...really just a house. The level design is beautiful and amazing but I think it doesn’t really carry the point as strongly simply because it’s not any more dangerous than any other mission and it’s just more fun when it comes to gameplay. The design is great but it never gave me the feeling of it being a horror house. So I think that demonizing Jindosh through hearsay instead of through his actual mission is a bit of a weird choice. A lot of things don’t reflect how evil he is, but not in the good way of “The Grand Inventor doesn’t seem evil but he is.” and instead you get it hammered how evil he is from the start without actually ever experiencing a climax of his evilness you wouldn’t expect. It’s not that every story should have a twist, but usually when you say someone is evil, you either make them good at the end or even more evil. Jindosh never has that climax, he is the same start to finish and that is... mildly annoying and slightly threatening. Like his level is pretty but not scary and they keep trying to convince you it’s scary which makes it weird which I guess is because if you listen to a lot of his unused lines and old concept art, he was supposed to be this stereotypical mad scientist but in the end they changed his visual design and lines so much he comes off as lukewarm. I understand what they tried to do with Jindosh but I feel like they failed to do it and had to rely on everyone saying he is super irredeemably evil to justify lobotomizing him.

Anyway this post is too long, sorry if the read more doesn’t go through somewhere and please feel free to counter my points I am open to different and non biased views (or even information I might not know because I haven’t read the books or found everything).