#that a stranger chooses to give a negative opinion publically while also enjoying my work they do like

[charlieslowartsies]

Friendly reminder you curate your own internet...and that maybe leaving a negative comment on a piece you don't like and telling me to "stop drawing art you don't want to see...but I don't want to tell you how to life your life" (yet faving 10 plus other pieces but no feedback) isn't the best use of ones time 💀

[avinox]

My Good Thoughts List

I have a pretty long term, genetically influenced, type of depression. I also have anxiety. Both diagnosed. In fact, I’ve been in therapy for about a year and a half, but this year I haven’t been able to continue because we simply don’t have that kind of money due to a variety of circumstances. 

I told myself I would keep up the good work alone for as long as I could because I don’t like how things were when I didn’t try to get better. I’ve been close to suicide multiple times, but thankfully I’m too scared of what would come next. 

I made a list long ago of things to think when I was about to get into the irrational zone. Now I have updated it. It has stuff I’ve read on the internet, things I got from my therapist, and stuff I came up with on my own. I really hope this helps someone. 

This isn’t a one-time thing, though, you need to keep reminding yourself of this if you want to get somewhere. Good luck!

Stop the inner critic. Get a hobby, dude.

Remember the benefits of what you’re doing.

Practice self-appreciation. You do have good traits and you can be proud of them. You can say this out loud.

Perfection is not accomplishable.

Find the upside of the situation. It’s a learning opportunity.

You are your own best friend. You should treat yourself as such.

Act nicer towards other. Avoid petty and saltiness. It’s contagious.

Comparisons aren’t fair. Give yourself time to bloom.

Focus on learning, not studying.

Your health is more important than your grades.

Don’t overshare. Do not rely on others’ attention to prove you’re worth something. It comes as fast as it goes.

“Do no harm, but take no shit.” Don’t let people step on you. You can see when it happens.

Not every problem leads to a life-or-death argument. Both sides are able to learn. Don’t give up too quickly.

Yes, strangers will help you out if you have a problem, specially if you ask them personally. That has already been proven to be true in my case. I have lived it. They will help.

If you need to do it for your health, you need to do it for your health. Even if it’s in public. Even if it looks weird. You can very easily explain why it’s logical to those who stare. Keep a straight face and act calmly. They are the fools now.

“This happens” So what? “I’m ashamed” So what? Really, what you’re actually scared of are the opinions of strangers. Why?

Be the weird person everyone can see not giving a shit about your opinion on them. In public!

You have things to improve about yourself, and that’s not something to be ashamed of.

Only if you don’t react will your situation stay the same. If you became lost at a desert, wouldn’t you try to find your way out and survive?

Don’t focus on the negative side for too long. And most importantly, don’t write about your pains on places you check regularly. It’s the bad kind of nostalgia.

Just as you have to think before you speak, you also have to cry and calm down before attempting something irreversible.

As long as you’re not doing harm to anyone, directly or indirectly, you are allowed to enjoy that thing, silly as it is.

You can hurt people with your behavior, so you should keep yourself in check, take your time before making a decision in the wrong mood, and accept the fact that you can fuck up too. Apologize when that happens. You can have a long-term effect on others too.

Asking is the method by which you can learn something new and understand it. Are you a little behind everyone else? Perhaps; that’s why you’re asking, to keep up.

Cherish the time you have.

You actually do need to exercise. Sun and activity improves anyone’s mood. You can control this now, though, no need to push yourself like in high school. This shouldn’t be a chore.

We are connected to each other and our environment. When you leave, you will have left your mark here. There are people who will remember and care. You aren’t meaningless. You are important too.

Doing the right thing sometimes means swallowing your pride and talking about it. Apologizing. Sometimes it’s about stepping up and confronting a scary situation, even if it makes you cry afterwards. You can have pride and not be the wrong kind of prideful.

I want to be the person someone else aspires to be. And not just in a big scale. Small things matter too.

Give yourself some time. When you’re at your worst, you don’t want help, you want comfort. You will understand what this list is for later. Because you’ll be there to read it.

Appreciate good times and take pleasure in small things.

You don’t have to put anyone down to prove yourself. You can show what you’re worth by your actions. If you need to feel superior to others to feel good, you’re doing something wrong.

Needing and asking for help isn’t something to be ashamed of.

Hurting and starving yourself will not help. Keeping this mindset and reading this is a better option.

This won’t last forever.

Leaving the internet for a while to focus on yourself and your improvement is incredibly helpful.

Stay here just to look at the stars. There are so many things we don’t know yet, so many questions. Aren’t you curious about the answers?

Things you don’t have any power over aren’t worth worrying about. There’s stuff you simply could never have chosen about yourself.

I’m not an individual removed from the world, I am part of it.

Being upset is legal, and bottling things up could end up bad for anyone involved. Need to rant? At worst, you can write on a diary. Writing down your worries does help.

You know yourself better now. You know what things work with you.

You live in the present. The past is gone, and the future is just a concept.

Do the thing that’s better for yourself in the long run; don’t choose the momentary comfort if it could hinder your long-term goals.

Sometimes you need to look good for yourself. You can improve your mood doing this.

You have no means of knowing what others think of you if you don’t ask them. You can’t read minds. You shouldn’t assume anything.

You are exactly as important as everyone else, and you should never forget it.

You, not the criticizing voice in your head, are your best judge. You know exactly how you’re doing.

[unproduciblesmackdown]

primes And multiples of 8

oh Thank You this sure turned out to be a bunch of questions lol, what else is better for keeping occupied on go stupid sunday

2: Favorite book?

lbh i don’t have one 

3: Favorite fictional character?

oh god lmao i mean again when it comes to Favorite ___ i have no *real* answers but atm i keep just sitting here staring at the quant don’t i

5: What’s your favorite fictional ship? (Canon or otherwise)

even with the “i don’t have Favorite anything” factor even this is always like. my ass doesn’t know how to Not like, think up a good half dozen or more potential relationships or whatever and decide they’re all fun……im rarely like “wow even narrowed down to this one particular Media i live and die by this otp within it”…….boring answer but really like even if this was applied Just to some particular work where i’m [staring at a Fave] or whatever i still dunno if there’s anything where i’m not #about [multiple possible Relationships]

7: List 3 negative traits you have

ooh fantastic. let’s lump “Too: passive / avoidant / nonconfrontational” into one, rest in pieces u_u. #2 im a lil temperamental lmao like, bit too much sometimes. #3 despite number one there i also don’t have a world of restraint lmfao which is just like. how i be but can certainly be a downside sometimes

8: How does someone become important to you?

idk i virtually always meet ppl via Mutual Interest……my social sphere is mainly “friendly acquaintances” or whatever where it’s like i may or may not have talked to most of them in the past >[0.5 years]………just a process really of “we Keep Interacting” and “we like each other” lmao like. it’s both very not difficult and also. difficult lol

11: How do you decide when it’s time to cut someone out of your life for good?

uhh not like there’s a strict analytical methodology here but i guess it’s like “hmm this person makes me p miserable / i do not even actually like having them in my life” lmao

13: What are your favorite lyrics currently?

ooh the “currently” Might make a Favorite question easier but i don’t even have Favorite Lyrics Currently lmao. it’s lucky if i’m even paying attention well enough to stuff to absorb the lyrics the first like dozen times i listen to a song and also i’m rarely like “oo Resonant” when it comes to lyrics anyway?? does it count if more than survive gets stuck in my head….even then it’s like. i always like the “of all the characters at school i am not the one who the story’s about” while Blatantly Being The Protagonist lmao b/c like…..idk i never like story structures where the protagonist is just like clearly kinda elevated like Obviously The Hero B/c They’re Better Than Everyone Around Them or something like more important / deserving than other people and i definitely find it harder to care about / connect with Protagonists / ~main characters~ who are treated like that. and obviously bmc is really not about that either lmao i appreciate that a lot

16: What is something you really want?

i think we can all agree our lives could be improved with money. also….in these times of covid…….. :| would want literal immunity for people……..april 2020……

17: If you could make a wish, what would you wish for if you knew it would come true?

i mean damn see above like. got the Wish Tiers like “personal things re: myself in particular” and “for people i personally know / smaller stuff i care about” but like damn in this day and age especially it’d be like well, Humanity Not Being Destroyed is kinda a thing isn’t it. can’t have any slightly more fun wishes b/c these [systems] will be like [exists and affects everything horribly]

19: How do you handle heartbreak? Is it something that’s easy for you to get over, or something you struggle with?

is it easy for anyone to get over!! i don’t have to deal with romantic heartbreak though which i guess is what it means. galaxy braining that issue lmfao

23: What do you want your future to be like?

man ties in with 16 and 17 but also like we sure exist under capitalism always don’t we, and it’s tricky when like “it would be nice to have a small personal apartment to live in wouldn’t it” is this fever dream for all of us. but it Would be nice. having the time and money for Making Food whenever you feel like, right. it’s always like “if i was in a situation where i could just bake something due to Feeling like it i’d probably be doing okay” lmao. love to have access to healthcare someday. it’s all like depressingly low standards that are also depressingly ~unrealistic~ lol like i do not Ponder the future much. i also don’t have like, longtime aspirations/dreams or even Not longtime ones so i can’t be like “would love to have a career in/doing ___” but also yknow im good with I Don’t Need A Dream Job, would just like jobs to be non-horrible and to have time to like, do shit on my own outside of that, b/c that’s what i like to do lol…..but then also it would be fun to like, one way or another, get to spend a lot of time putting effort into some kind of in-some-way-Collaborative Project / Endeavor and get to be really engaged. the idea of getting to be around multiple people who it’s fun to be around and it doesn’t feel super temporary is Wild like, intimidating to listen to “the bar song” b/c i’ll just cry after 3 seconds. also i just like to be around people like, used to think that being anxious and all i wouldn’t want to live in a city but probably the opposite’s true….yeah i like to have a space where i can be alone / unobserved but i also like to at any time be able to be Amongst ppl even if not interacting with them (and also im usually more relaxed interacting w/ strangers than ppl i know)…….but really i have no details i’m just fingers crossed that at any given time i’m more than a couple steps away from like the post about [body wearing the funniest hat you’ve ever seen] lmfao and like. would rather not die in a pandemic either

24: Have you ever met someone you never thought you’d become close to?

in an “and i was right” way, sure lol, but otherwise i don’t think so

29: Do you think zodiac signs can influence someone’s personality to an extent?

it’s like Not Really But How Would I Know and yet i’m gonna kill everybody doing the shit just treating it like alternate myer-briggs types like delete your tweets 

31: What does ‘self care’ look like for you? 

#selfcare idk. me passing out or making the effort of getting food? great to step outside and pet a cat i guess but also that’s just fun. i don’t have a real methodology or approach here either. is me reblogging ask memes to ask for attention / distraction self care? is Napping to reset the mood self care? you be the judge

32: If you could go back in time and re-live your life up to this point, knowing everything that you know now, would you make different decisions?

eh not really……tfw everything that is the way it is now including “knowing what you know now” is a result of everything having happened exactly the way it already did……..

37: Have you ever been surprised by someone staying in your life?

i’m like Only surprised by it

40: What makes you feel confident?

thinking abt the tweet(?) which is like “when ur walking around in public pretend crazy in love is playing”……being around the lgbtqs obviously…..feeling able to Be Funny b/c like. that depends on the people i’m around too lol.

41: How do you show you care?

love languages……..uh i will do Favors. acts of service or whatever lol. i also like to give gifts. compliments??? idk it’s hard to judge this lmao i will cheer someone on, usually figuratively lol…….Liking A Tweet idk. an attempt was made

43: Which of the seven deadly sins do you feel represents you the most?

we need better sins. am i vainglorious for being opinionated / stubborn. "being not cishet” probably would be considered lust, and that’s a pretty important thing lmao. lust for life….the illicit sexual desire of being An Lgbtq…… i feel like i can be impatient, so i supposed that’s wrathfulness……hard to choose just one and yet again also. the list bites

47: What are you passionate about?

easily a lot of stuff that i find Engaging b/c i’m just sort of like that but i mean. easy answer is just: [interests]

48: Have you ever started to try learning about a subject only to realize it’s not something you enjoy?

not really……if i’m trying to learn something myself i probably had some level of “already knowing i like it to some degree” to even have the motivation in the first place

[liasfinalportfolio]

The Learning Profile Draft #3

How Homeschooling Affects a Student’s Independence

People always seem to have an opinion about homeschooling. Whether it is believing homeschooling is the only way to teach your kids right, believing no kid should ever homeschool, or believing the parent should decide, everyone always says something. Whenever the topic of schools comes up, and it’s revealed that I’m homeschooled I normally hear one of two reactions: either they proclaim they wish they could be homeschooled too, or

they say they’d hate being homeschooled.

But no matter the reaction, there are always a few questions that follow,  and some of the more frequent ones right after ‘How does it work’ are ‘But how do you make friends?’ ‘Don’t you get lonely?’ or worse ‘You seem normal for a homeschooler’.

People always seem to have an opinion on homeschooling; and sometimes that opinion comes from misconceptions. All of that brings us back  to our topic. How can homeschooling affect a student? Can homeschoolers be independent, both in social situations and in educational situations? Just how exactly does homeschooling affect the students, and how is it different from public or private school? Can homeschooling make students more independent?

One of the biggest hurdles for a percentage of homeschoolers (myself included) is focusing and procrastinating. Maintaining focus on what you are currently working at and stopping yourself from procrastination isn't as easy as it seems; especially with the freedom homeschooling gives you. There are a few ways to overcome this. Some students end up becoming more independent because of it, learning how to do school work by themselves without being forced.

In school there is always a teacher making sure the student is working, which is good for procrastinators but doesn’t really teach the students how to do it by themselves.  

However when homeschooling you only really have yourself and your parents to keep you in check.

It is hard to know how well homeschoolers fare after graduation, seeing as most of the information about it focus only on homeschoolers who attended college and university. Those who did seem to do well in their career of choice, oftentimes going for leadership positions.

Does homeschooling affect students socially? In a positive or negative way? People are always asking the same question; will homeschooling make my kid asocial? Will it affect them negatively in the social side of things? I have never been an independent person. I wouldn’t say I was independent before homeschooling, and I wouldn't really say I am now. However I can surely say I am far more independent than when I started.

The thing about public/private school is that while it tends to teach you how to socialize, it does not really teach you how to make friends. Students talk to each other because that’s the only option (or just not having friends).

Homeschooling on the other hand, it forces you to look for people to talk to outside. I, myself, used to be a somewhat shy person. Especially when talking to strangers, however I’ve been forced, in a way, to face that fear.  Homeschooling making you more likely to reach out instead of waiting for things to come. While on public/private school there’s after school classes and extracurriculars, if you really want to do something while homeschooling you need to look for it yourself.

Homeschooling can have various effects on students. Some parents have noticed it helped their kids with anxiety and depression others haven’t noticed a difference and others have noticed their child concentrates less.

The truth is, that homeschooling affects every person differently depending on personality, approach and guidance. However something that seems frequent in all the homeschoolers I’ve asked, is a boost in self-esteem and initiative, which leads us back to the path of independence.

To find more information about the experiences of homeschoolers, especially through the parents eyes I asked some mothers about their children. Oftentimes one does not notice changes one goes through, and looking at things from an outsider’s point of view is always a little enlightening.

1. Do you believe homeschooling can make a student more independent than public/private school?

2. What positive changes have you noticed on your child since they started homeschooling?

3. What negative changes have you noticed on your child since they have started homeschooling?

4. Do you think your child is more proactive after starting homeschooling than before?

5. Do you think homeschooling has given your child more confidence than public/private school?

6. Any other thoughts on the subject?

Farah Espinal Ramírez

Yes, because we understand that children, when not constantly surrounded by their peers are enriched by the people of different ages that surround them and this favours their independence.

They enjoy learning new things, went from memorizing to gaining/understanding knowledge, are now more capable of applying what they learn, has developed various interests, socialises with everyone, doesn’t matter whether they are an elderly or a baby.

Sometimes, because of the schedule flexibility we have, they want to postpone classes further than acceptable. They wake up and fall asleep later than desired. They change classes from morning to afternoon as convenient.

In general yes, they always do what they should do when they should do it and they are not limited by the time of the task requested. If they really enjoy and are interested in what they are studying, they keep working on it, even if the time for said homework is over and they have already finished their task. They keep looking, asking, practicing and learning until they feel they have the answers they were looking for.

Yes. The fact of developing in an environment with people of different ages has contributed to strengthening their confidence and that they are not embarrassed, for example, to speak in public, with older people, strangers, etc.

By not being exposed to the pressure to fit into a group, they have been free to express their personalities and be as they want to be, without fear of rejection. This has contributed to strong self-esteem at their young age.

Homeschooling is definitely not for everyone. Whoever is dedicated to the formation of children must generally sacrifice a lot on a personal level; professional career, hobbies, personal time, tastes, etc. but one receives one of the greatest gratifications in the world, which is to raise your children and watch them grow, participate in their lives, be a present father/mother in both body and soul, mold them, help them and instill good values… and that has no price.

Francis Vargas

1-In his social life, then, obviously that does not make him more independent, since in a classroom school he can have more contact and relate daily with more classmates; he can choose with whom and not develop an interaction, now in his personal performance of the classes, because he learns to take care of his education, creating awareness of his own development and rhythm of learning. At this point they acquire greater responsibility.

2-Well in my particular case, it is a process in development to be able to see consistent positive changes. We are in our first year and honestly the process of adaptation brings more cons than pros. there is a whole remnant of situations of emotions and feelings and habits found, such as: that they miss their friends, recreation and games in groups, sharing their things in conversations, doing group tasks, walks and the same dynamics of the beginning of classes with the purchases of all the tools and things like that. In some positive changes, now they share more among them, they talk more, they spend more time in family, they are oriented in their subjects biblically and that is a great thing, besides they feel more confident to ask, of course, that will depend on as we answer them, if with reproaches, or encourage them. Surely better things will come in the future, God willing.

3-For sometimes they become disenchanted by the study due to the change of system, you have to live motivating them. They get a little lazy and you have to be on top of them so that you do not lose time in a single subject. There are times that you have to wake them up, if not, imagine. It can also happen that they get anxious to spend so much time in the house, that's why we try not to spend two weekends without taking them out to eat, visit, etc.

4-So far, there are seasons that yes, others that you have to put them to that.

5-The smallest one is usually stuck with things that we think should have already been learned, basic things, is insecure; and we have come to the conclusion that it has gaps brought from the previous system. The older one does better in that aspect.

6-Well, we have to keep working hard with them until they assimilate all this new teaching model. Usually one sometimes makes the mistake of letting go after giving some explanation, but that often does not work because they are destabilized with time and the assimilation of the content. You have to be present as long as possible with them to monitor them properly.

The Reflective Essay Draft #1

Reading Narrative.

I can’t actually remember a time I was tasked to think for myself. I can remember times where I was perhaps tasked to think, and I can remember times when I thought to myself but never the two combined.

I feel like one can get by without really thinking. It won’t be as fulfilling as it could be, but it’s feasible. One can live without thinking too deeply, without finding the meaning to things. I think the only times I’ve really been introspective have been out of my own volition, never really ‘tasked’.

Perhaps a reason for this is that I sometimes shut down at certain situations. I’m physically present but I try to ignore any type of non-superficial thinking. I try to keep my thoughts as basic as they can be, maybe even unconsciously attempt dissociating.

The reason I do this is because -here’s something almost no one know- I’m a real cry baby. I keep my thoughts clean and nice as to not give away to the guilt and hate inside myself (and woah does that sound dramatic, I’m such a teenager) and break down crying.

Obviously bottling feelings is good for no one in the long term, however I try to cry whenever I’m alone. I’m not saying however I cry myself to sleep each night or anything like that, crying is surprisingly hard whenever I’m actually trying to, I just mean I try to keep the crying to some place private.

Back to the thinking to myself bit however, I’ve addressed why I personally try to avoid situations like that but still, shouldn’t they have come anyways?

Well, I actually don’t know if a situation like that has happened to me, but as far as I know it hasn’t. Most situations in life can be resolved like acting like you think you should act, by acting like someone else, whether that person is real or a perfect person you’ve made in your head* you can live without actually thinking for yourself.

*and wow I meant that just as a comment but I’ve just realized I do tend to imagine what if those perfectionists characters were with me, what would Raito Yagami, Lelouch vi Britannia, young Tom Riddle would do? Because if those evil geniuses were able to get outta any situation shouldn’t I too? Also does it say something of me that all my fictional  ‘role models’ per se are dead?

So as I was writing this my parents asked me what I was doing and turns out I was probably thinking of a different type of ‘thinking for yourself’. They gave a couple of examples that weren’t at all what I was thinking of but I shall use. Mayhaps to avoid thinking for examples myself. (That was a joke)

So one example they told me of was back when I was around 10 or 12 and there was a talent show in my school. I was very excited to do something, and my friends decided to do a dance with the song ‘Limbo’ from Daddy Yankee (a song I didn’t like back then, and only like now because of nostalgia). They invited me to join them after part of the dance was already choreographed and I was probably the most excited little girl ever.

I came home, told my family all about it and slept happily. The next day at school however I was severely disappointed. I really wanted to join the dance, however some of the moves where very vulgar for my age (I don’t actually remember what they where, just that it went against my moral code back then. It probably wasn’t as bad as I remember. Also it’s to be noted I’m not against all dance moves or whatever, it’s just stuff like twerking and thrusting at a girl’s behind I find somewhat distasteful) and I just couldn’t do it. After a while I just gave up on my dream of joining the talent show (I was too shy for an solo act).

After a couple days however, I decided to try and convince the to change the move. They didn’t want to so me, being the cunning little tyke I was (how was I popular??) I convinced them to ask a teacher if the move would be too much.

It was.

Eventually we decided to take the move out and I was the happiest little bugger there was.

And I know my mother meant that I ‘thought for myself’ by sticking to my morals and giving up on my dream (at that moments, kids dreams change all the time) but all I can think of is me manipulating those girls, what the heck young me?

Also the mood definitely lifted with that story there. Humour is also something I use, makes people laugh (which feels nice), makes me more likable and keeps them from noticing I’m not really as put together as I seem.

I feel like I strayed from what I was supposed to write but I hope one of those answers where right.

[kyeshanelsonfmp-blog]

Am I a victim of my own concept?

Circular line in the photograph 1.1

From my final photos gathered from my test shoot and final shoot, the image above has been the most popular due to the composition; which has then made the context clearer for people to read, allowing them to relate and/ or understand creating a stronger interest. At a first glance of the image you see two girls, and one mirroring the other. When looking closer, you realise the elder girl is also mirroring Kim Kardashian on the screen, then we conclude with a domino effect from the influencer, to the teenager then down to the child.

For some this could be a harmless image but once understanding the reflection it has to the real world, perhaps it is something not to be taken so lightly. Kim Kardashian is a TV personality and socialite who gained media attention once her father won the O.J. Simpson trial. She then started socializing with popular famous peers which help her gain popularity, but what catapulted her to the top was her sex tape with another famous body. Since then it seems that she hasn’t been able to escape this heavy mistake... So has learnt how to manipulate peoples negative views of her, by building herself an empire on “self love”. By doing so she spends her public days looking like a beauty queen, and exploits her own body through fashion and encourages everyday people through social media to do the same. For Kim’s ever growing profitable fans, the majority of people using social media are between the ages of 15 and 25... Even more so between the ages 15 and 20. Unfortunately the majority of people are most impressionable bellow the age of 25 and look up to Kim. Many copying her fashion, the language she uses and how she displays her body.

All things fine until you become obsessed with looking this way and being this way. A persons own self confidence fades away while trying to keep up with celebrities promoting to ‘love yourself’, reaching impossible aesthetics with a 24/7 team of professionals to ensure they maintain this image. Without noticing, young people kill their own self-esteem and put their own physical health at risk to copy the way how celebrities of today look. Influence starts small, but then can grow into an obsession. Although celebrities are only human, and they must have influences too. Being influenced isn’t an issue, but what people are influencing others to do can be detrimental depending on the content and direction.

Since my Mum was a child, my Nana owned and orchestrated a dance school. Once a year like final exams in schools, there was a 2 hour long dance show. In this dance show everyone no matter what age or gender was dressed to dance the roll, and tell the story of the the music. In dance, typically women are made to look elegant or sexy and men to be strong and fierce. As a child who enjoyed dancing and looked up to their Mum and Nana, dance became my passion for a very long time throughout my child and teen life, so did the whole production. When a competition or show was coming up the environment became strict, like it was all or nothing. Rehearsing the same choreography again and again into the night, after a full day dancing. During lessons, rehearsals, competitions and shows the uniform/costumes were always tight fitting, especially for the girls. Leotards and tights for girls and a polo neck top and shorts for boys. As much as I enjoyed everything about dancing, I couldn’t help but find it unfair that I couldn’t wear the same as the boys and still be as 'pretty’ as the girls. I was partly conditioned to believe that the stereotypes in traditional dance, was the way I had to be or I felt slightly out of place. Of course I was not purposely made to feel this way, it was simply the way my Nana wanted to run her dance school. Most probably because she was raised for females to be beautiful and feminine, and for males to be strong and masculine with their dress code.

Over time since my Nana’s generation were teenagers, fashion has changed in such a way that it has become more freeing for designers to design more extravagant clothing - more colourful, stranger shapes, use of experimental materials and more revealing. Even more so in today’s society, sexy sells, especially when celebrities are promoting it and being paid millions to do so. They exploit their bodies through fashion and encourages everyday people through social media to do the same. Like I said earlier, the majority of people are most impressionable bellow the age of 25 and look up to Celebrities. Many copying their fashion, language they use and how they displays their body, until they become obsessed with looking a particular unrealistic way. 

3.2

While writing this post and reviewing my previous work, I have come to a realisation that to be influenced is something that someone can not avoid unless they are aware that they are influenced, and then choose to follow or abandon it. Although, why are people so influenced by those around them? It is so that they can make a gain socially or personally, no one ever follows an influence with the idea that the outcome will not benefit them as they wish. Thousands of people globally conform to the influence of celebrities in hope that one day they can too benefit in one of the ways they do, whether they end up more attractive, richer, happier... In hope to make some sort of gain. My FMP and I are prime examples of this trend. I started my artist research and decided that I wanted to produce an FMP that the public could personally connect with. I did this by creating a survey incorporating my interest, to enable myself to produce a final idea for my FMP that I can be sure that the public will enjoy, but at the same time, I also have an interest in/ can relate to. My thought process was, if the public can connect with my work in a stronger way, my work would be successful, and I wanted it to be personal so that it would be even more successful, granting me my desired grade. Even when choosing my best images from my test and final shoots, I knew which photos I liked the most; but I chose to ask my teachers a peers for their opinions as well as my own to give myself the validation that I was still on the right track, because if people like my work it means I am more likely to receive a better grade.

Lastly my final realisation is that I believe I am a much more impressionable person than I would like other people believe. I have been put in the position of having five younger sisters who I have to influence in the right ways. Unfortunately, for them to have me as one of their biggest influences during the most impressionable years, a huge part of me fears that if I demonstrate ill manors and wrong doings due to my own influences, they may not grow up to be as great as they could be due to my own influence. Therefore with my photos I have taken advantage of being the photographer and not the subject, and am deflecting the issue away from myself.

[themomsandthecity]

Should I Send My Kid to Preschool?

My son turned 3 in June, and I've already had a few people ask me where I will be sending him to preschool. "It will get him socialized before kindergarten, and you don't want him to be behind," they said. I shrugged it off; it sounded like a glorified day care to me. But then I started to worry. What if my son does get behind and I could have prevented it? What if he gets to kindergarten and starts to pull other kids' hair or scratch them or, even worse, bite them? I was a biter. Then reality set in, and I panicked. "If I don't send him to preschool, he could get kicked out of kindergarten and it will be my fault." I couldn't let that idea escape me and it really made me wonder. Should I send my kid to preschool? Until this point, I've been fortunate enough to avoid the high sticker price of day care. I primarily work from home and I have a lot of family that lives close by. So the idea of paying a stranger to teach my son while I do laundry or mow the lawn seems absurd. I started asking my mommy friends what the going rate was for preschool, and I was shocked! Related 3 Reasons to Send Your Child to Preschool One of my friends has a baby under the age of 1 and a 3-year-old. She pays close to $900 dollars a month for her two sons, and that's after her 15 percent discount. Another friend of mine spends $600 dollars a month on preschool for her 3-year-old daughter. Yet another friend spends $400 a month for her daughter, and she gets an employee discount for working at the school because she's a teacher. These numbers made my head spin! How am I going to afford preschool and college? I started thinking about items in my home I could sell, or side jobs I could do. "Do they take credit cards?" I was ready to vomit when, out of the blue, I heard some healing news. My friend Kristi's 4-year-old son just started pre-K at a public school, and she told me it was a free program. "It's free?" I said. I didn't realize that Florida (where I live) has state-funded pre-K. This means I can take my son to a public preschool after he turns 4 and not pay a single dime. I took a couple of deep breaths, had a glass of Pinot, and dove headfirst into Google. I needed more statistics and some info. After reading numerous articles and multiple studies, I had a good understanding of preschool and how it could benefit my child. But I wasn't quite convinced. I wanted to speak to an actual person, someone who could give me a personal account of how impactful preschool could be. So I phoned Charlsie McElroy, my cousin who teaches first grade, and her mother (my aunt), Dr. Jobeth Bird. Dr. Bird is a retired elementary school principal with a 32-year-career in the field of education. They both gave me their professional opinions on how beneficial preschool can be and why I should strongly consider it for my son. Here are some of the major pros and cons when considering preschool for your child. Pro: They will learn to socialize better and share. I take my son on a lot of playdates. We regularly attend the library for story time, the waterpark (during season), Chik-fil-A's playground, and even Gymnastics Plus for the preschool jam. But he only engages with one or two kids a day. In preschool, they spend four hours a day with 10-20 other kids their age. They will be forced to share that one teddy bear or Lego set and have no choice other than to work with (rather than against) other children. Opposition: Lots of siblings and/or friends. If they already have two or three siblings in their life 24/7, socialization and learning to share might not be a major priority. They may already be getting the social skills they need from their siblings, cousins, and even neighborhood friends. Con: Preschool is expensive. There are still six states remaining in the US that have a zero budget for state-funded preschool. Your only option may be to fund it yourself, and we've already covered how expensive it can be. Opposition: It could be free. The good news is there are 44 states with state-funded preschool. If you live in one of these states, then just be thankful and take the cost of preschool out of your cons list. There are also a lot of churches that do preschool, and some are nonprofit. It's worth looking into. Pro: Routine and attention span. In preschool, they are introduced to a routine, and in kindergarten, they are forced into it. Kids who are used to a routine can focus more on academics. Less temper tantrums, a lot more learning. Dr Bird said she witnessed a major difference in the kids who skipped out on pre-K."They did not have the routine down or the attention span that the other kids did," she said. "And they really struggled because of it." Con: Transportation might be a challenge. Now that you've signed them up, how will they get there? Riding the bus to school isn't recommended until kindergarten, and preschool isn't full-time like K-12. It will be your responsibility to drop them off and rush back a few hours later to pick them up. If you don't have a car or the time to make all the necessary trips, this might be a problem. Possible solution: Try carpooling with a fellow mom or asking grandma for help every now and then. Pro: They will learn to problem-solve. Wouldn't life be great without any math problems or social problems or emotional problems? Problems are what make the world go round, and we love to hate them. "Most preschools will teach kids to count with blocks and actually learn what letters are," Charlsie McElroy said. In most preschools, the focus is on learning in a fun environment; no major math or reading will be introduced until grade school. Related What a 25-Year Veteran Teacher Wants Parents to Realize About Kindergarten Con: Some preschools are glorified day cares. Be aware of what preschool you decide to take your little one to. There are plenty of day cares out there with a preschool label slapped on the title. I'm not slamming all day care, but some are there to take your money and provide you with very little return on your investment. Make sure you choose a place with a trained professional and avoid an establishment that will simply stick your kid in front of a TV all day. You can do that yourself for free. Pro: They will build motor skills. My son seems to be focused on scissors a lot lately, and that terrifies me. In preschool, they will be taught how to cut and color, thread beads, climb, and glue. I have already begun to incorporate these things into my son's routine now, but it will help him to be around other children who are also learning these skills for the first time. Con: Early schooling might have a negative effect on your child's development. This is an age-old argument that is never going away. Experts say a child's brain reaches 90 percent capacity by age 5 and that maximizing their ability to learn is essential. But others argue that we are overschooling our children and we shouldn't be teaching them any academics until they are 6 or even 7 years old. Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but that seems a little absurd. That is the beauty of perspective and why we all must find our own. Do a little research. Knowledge is power. Being well-informed before you make your decision is key. Pro: It can increase their self-esteem. Having high self-esteem is going to be very important for your child over the course of their school journey. Children who attend preschool have higher self-esteem by kindergarten than ones who didn't. "The biggest difference was self-esteem and how much they liked school," Dr. Bird said. "The ones who had high self-esteem were willing to try more." Con: They might be better off with the person who loves them the most. This is the only reason that I am still not quite convinced. I know how much time I spend teaching my son right from wrong. I do daily activities with him. I read with him. I have playdates with him. I even take him outside when he wants to swing or swim (even when it's 100 degrees). I nurture and love him every single day. A stranger can't give him the personal attention that I can when they are responsible for 20 other kids. Related Mom Photographs Her Daughter Before and After Her First Day of Preschool and the Results Are Hilarious Middle ground: It's a personal choice. Every child has a different home life. Some have parents who must both work 40+ hours a week to pay the bills. Staying home with your child and creating that fun daytime environment might not be an option for you. That's OK because you are doing the best you can. Be proud of that. Take full advantage of the benefits that preschool can offer and enjoy watching your kid grow stronger and smarter every day. http://bit.ly/2vFZj3v