#that said i still think its so funny that people in-universe seem to think he's nicer/more normal than larry

[thatdammchickennugget]

Can you please write a little something for enzo to do with a soulmate au, i adore your writing, thank you <3

Something Special

pairing - lorenzo berkshire x gn!reader

warnings - fluff

a/n - thanks for requesting 💕

wordcount - 673

The city hummed with its usual cacophony of sounds as you navigated the crowded streets, lost in the rhythm of your own thoughts. The concept of soulmates had always seemed like a distant fairytaleto you, something reserved for the pages of romance novels. More and more of your friends had been running into their soulmate, but after waiting for so many years already, you had started to think it would never happen for you. But little did you know, destiny had other plans in store.

It was a serendipitous moment, amidst the hustle and bustle of the city, when you first laid eyes on him. He stood out from the crowd like a beacon of light. His presence was magnetic, drawing you in with an inexplicable force.

As you passed by, your eyes met his, and for a brief moment, time seemed to stand still. It was as if the universe had hit pause, allowing you to bask in the warmth of each other's gaze. In that moment, you felt a stirring deep within your soul, a feeling you couldn't quite put into words.

It wasn't until later, as you sat alone in your favorite cafe, that the realization dawned upon you like the first light of dawn. You had actually seen soulmate, the missing piece of your puzzle that you had been searching for all along. The thought sent shivers down your spine, filling you with a sense of awe and wonder.

The bell above the cafe door chimed, signaling the arrival of a new patron. Glancing up from your seat, your heart skipped a beat as you saw him once again, standing there with that same captivating presence that had drawn you in earlier.

Your breath caught in your throat, disbelief washing over you like a tidal wave. Twice in one day, it seemed almost too good to be true. Was this some sort of cosmic joke, or had fate truly smiled upon you?

His eyes scanned the room, and when they met yours, a smile tugged at the corners of his lips. It was as if he too couldn't believe the coincidence of crossing paths again so soon.

With trembling hands, you beckoned him over, unable to contain the rush of emotions coursing through you. As he approached, the air seemed to crackle with an electric energy, the universe itself conspiring to bring you closer together.

"Hey," you greeted him, your voice barely above a whisper, still awestruck by the sheer improbability of the moment. "What are the chances of running into you twice in one day?"

He chuckled softly, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "Seems like fate has a funny way of bringing people together," he remarked, taking a seat across from you.

His charming smile widened as he settled into the chair opposite you, his gaze warm and inviting. "I suppose fate works in mysterious ways," he replied, his voice smooth like velvet. "But I'm not one to question it when it leads me to such delightful company."

His words sent a flutter through your chest, a rush of warmth spreading from the pit of your stomach to the tips of your fingers. It was as if every nerve in your body was attuned to his presence, resonating with a harmony that transcended mere coincidence.

"I'm Enzo, by the way," he continued, extending a hand across the table. "Enzo Berkshire.”

Your heart skipped a beat as you reached out to shake his hand, the simple act sending sparks flying between you. Your voice was barely a whisper as you struggled told him your own name.

Enzo's eyes sparkled with curiosity as he studied you, as if trying to unravel the secrets hidden beneath the surface. "Well, it's a pleasure to meet you," he said, his smile never faltering. "Perhaps fate has something special in store for us today."

And as you sat there, lost in conversation with your soulmate, the world around you seemed to fade into the background, leaving only the two of you in its wake.

Enzo Taglist - @slytherinboysappreciation @urmomsgirlfriend1 @starsval @gillyweeds @sir-elian @harryslittlebitch @gayforyelena @whoreforfictionalmen18 @ravenclawprincess33 @sbrn0905 @helpimhopelesslyinlove @Yhiiil @themarauderswife7 @moonlightreader649 @ihatemyexs @chgrch @nat1221 @thestarlithideout @iamaslytherin0 @bath1lda @ohmaigwad @pinkposttragedy @allshitsangiggles @hoeforvinniehackerrr @mildly-delulu @h3artz4soph @sunasbbie @marsbars09 @vcosette @meepycheep @aglady13 @rinalouu @floswife @ariensversion @agent-tempest @s0urw00lf @thebiggestnaturaldisaster @pinkestfloyd @xlinxdax0704 @chulabeans @l0v3do11 @unstablereader @acourtoflostandwanderingstars @catiwinky @wolfstar-marvelsfan @captainstanksblog @istill-dream-ofyou @pinktreee @ceehance @lizhub @theadventuresofanartist @iamgayforyourmom1501 @feistyfox47 @nat1221 @i-think-you-are-gr8 @cas-planet @csmt_m @selyselyselyse @mrsriddles-blog @the-sylver-dragon @poppysrin @camille-1019 @laniirackssss @slvtfortheo @chosenoneslver @txzii @c0rnf1akessss @yourenogoodforme @opheliamalfoy236 @jeannie-beannie @starzioo @itsarajr @starsfortaylor

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[dirt-str1der]

Trans kiryu is a genuinely funny hc because like trans majima is like oohh angst ohh she has to fight to be accepted she has to deal with people making fun of her for being a man in a dress she has to take into account her position and social standing and kiryu is literally just kiryu forever because the universe loves him too much to ever force him into a situation unless its to go to prison in which case hes like yayyy i love jail yayy yayyy

[larrythefloridaman]

maybe J0hn for the character bingo? owo

love this man ive been attached to him since he first showed up <3 dont have too much new i can think of to say about him though

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

@gilbirda Ok, so you made a snippet of on of your AUs a while back (braindead rejected! soulmate i think) and I haven't been able to think of much else since. So my brain made a little thingy for you!

------------

1. Tim takes a risk one day by writing back to whoever was doodling on his body, with a glittery purple gel pen, asking them to stop trying to contacting him.

All the person asked was, "Why?"

Tim never answers.

2. Danny faces constant rejection from his peers, authority figures, his parents and sister neglect him and now his own soulmate doesn't want him. They hadn't even met before he was rejected. Jazz finds out about Dannys powers and tries to reach out but Danny rejects her pretty violently due to his own pain. Then the episode where Sam and Tucker ditch him for Gregor happens and he gives up.

The two people in his life that has had pretty much complete control over his life and trajectory just abandoned him and he does not take it well. He ripped the symbol off his chest, disappeared and never came back.

3. Danny zooms into a new dimension/universe/whatever to avoid his former friends and family from being able to track him only to land in a place called Central City and immediately getting roped into helping Captain Cold who gives him a normal domino mask and they end up working together for a while.

4. Danny somehow overhears one of the speedster talking on the phone about his friends brothers soulmate issue at some point and they perfectly describe the interaction that happened between Danny and his soulmate all those years ago, down to the glittery purple gel pen and the types of doodles Danny had made as a kid and the things he said.

Danny learned one of his soulmates belonged to a group of detective vigilantes in a place called Gotham. Unfortunately he was spotted by the speedster and Danny had to bounce.

5. The Flash made reports to the Justice League about a meta teen who hes been having trouble with for a while and can't seem to pin down. He only asked for tips though as he "could handle it himself."

6. Danny leaves for Gotham and learned about Catwoman and Batmans weird Master Thief and Greatest Detective dynamic and decided that's what he wants to do. He was going to make his soulmate chase after him one way or another. Someone was going to want him even if they were wanting him behind bars.

He begins robbing bank vaults and museums, leaving no trace or clue as to what happened until he starts leaving a calling card of sorts.

7. Jason, who's been on the outs with his family lately meets this spunky white haired meta kid running around with a sci-fi mask/visor thing and giving supplies to homeless encampments and keeping the less fortunate alive and befriends him. He learns that this is the guy everyone has been searching for and just...tells no one. Jason is all for a Robin Hood vigilante, and really, its kinda funny to see his family squirm.

8. Phantom and Catwoman rob the same museum at the same time but for different things. They stare at eachother from where they're both still crouched from thier respective landings until Danny breaks the tension with "I didn't see you if you didn't see me?"

Catwoman laughs, amused. "Sure."

9. Danny finally narrowed down which of the batfam is his soulmate and introduced himself to them as Phantom.

The first thing Danny did was hit on Tim. Tim is flustered but otherwise doesn't really respond to it and tries to fight Phantom into submission, so of course Danny ghosts him by disappearing through a roof mid fight. Danny made a big show of his intangibility in that fight and made it seem like it was the only power he had but he was very skilled with it and he wanted to impress him.

10. Phantom becomes well known to the underbelly of Gotham. Mostly the homeless and nightworkers. But Danny was open and friendly. Never judging and always ready to lend a helping hand. Even better. He never came to collect on favors.

Over time, they became loyal to him.

11. Danny gets framed for a series of murders and the whole gang (minus Hood) are trying to capture him, thus, motorcycle chase scene. They use the white of his tires to tell when he's gone intangible due to all the dirt falling off the wheels. Nightwing jumps onto the bike and shocks Danny with his encrizma sticks right before Danny grits out "bye bye birdy~" and makes a big show of taking in a deep breath and holding it.

Nightwing is forced to jump off the bike as Danny runs through the concrete abutment of the overpass and coming out the other side

12. Danny meets Tim and Duke in his civilian form while he was at a Wayne tech conference. Danny had been asked about one of his inventions and was trying to show off the blueprints and explain things and thats why he was there in the first place. Duke of course, was internally screaming because that's the guy thats the guy they've been hunting for nearly a year but can find nothing on.

Red Robin confronts Phantom that night on a rooftop and Phantom laughs at him, "Thats why I was avoiding Signal for so long. He'd see my magical girl form and know instantly."

RR holds out a pair of handcuffs and says "Its over Danny." Phantom smirks and says, "I don't think it is, Tim" before jumping off onto a different roof and disappearing into the night. Tim is shook.

13. Danny over hears Robin berating RR at an old clocktower and intervenes, "Little Wayne, you do realize you were the first person I figured out, right?"

Damian proceeds to lose his mind.

14. Tim accidentally finds a material that Phantom can't phase through and quickly gets to work making things he can use against Danny. What he doesn't know is that Danny can phase through it he just pretended he couldn't because he wanted to see what would happen/what Tim would do.

Danny can sense the material and it feels really wierd to him, but doesn't harm him at all.

15. RR manages to knock Phantoms visor off his face and realizing it was made of tech he swipes it and brings it back to the cave for study.

He wasn't ready for all the information on the computer. Not only was his nemesis(?) from another plain of reality (he thinks Danny is from the ghost zone) but he was once a superhero with his own Rogues Gallery and human city to protect. Which begs the question, why did he become a Phantom thief?

16. The Joker hears about Phantom giving the bats the run around and comes to a misunderstanding about which bat he's been messing with which ultimately ends with Joker saying that he is Batmans ultimate nemesis and Phantom asking what that had to do with him? The misunderstanding is cleared up when Phantom complained about Joker even thinking that he was flirting with Batman because "Ew! He's an old man!"

Joker still got a few shots in for the heck of it but so did our ghost boy but they were no longer enemies.

17. The whole batfam had been freaking out about finally capturing Phantom and celebrating and plotting on how they were gonna get him to keep his mouth shut about thier identities until Jason came in,

Jason: Need help?

Phantom: Please?

Jason: *escapes with Danny*

Batfam: What?! No!!! Why?!

18. The batfam have only a vague idea of the Robin Hood thing going on. They know he's doing it just not to the extent its gone to. They find out later on that Phantom had been working with RH and his gang to sell off the items and most of the profits go to helping people. Other times he strait up gives jewelry and whatnot to children and working girls because "Everyone deserves something pretty, and even if its not your style you can keep it for a rainy day"

Phantom quickly gains a following and Danny doesn't even know about it. Clueless indeed.

19. Dannys main motivation in this is essentially just playing Cops and Robbers with Red Robin. Nothing else really matters to him. Not the robberies, not the fact he's working with a crime lord, not even his own safety matters much to him anymore. Hes readily zooming down the path of self destruction and Hood starts telling his family stuff, but only because he was genuinely worried about "Casper" crashing and burning.

20. No one knows why Phantom is fixated on Red Robin. He refuses to tell them. Red thinks its just because he's the smartest of the bats and he's not entirely wrong.

21. Danny legit started scheduling his heists with Tim to ensure they're both free after one couldn't make it too many times which blew the birds mind. Phantom must have been just that confident that he would always win. The bats eventually think Danny will stop stealing if RR isn't in the city for a long period of time. Danny more or less followed him and stole stuff from whatever city Tim was in. If there wasn't any museums or banks then Danny would steal a local landmark. Tim still wasn't sure how Phantom stole an entire building that one time but it had never been seen since.

22. Hood grows to be very protective of our favorite ghost boy. They bond and are actually really close. Danny admits he always wanted an older brother.

23. Tim goes off world for a while to see how Danny would react and Danny just...drops off the radar. No one knows where he is and after a week or two they start getting worried.

Tim returns after three months and Danny reappears two weeks after him with a tan and keepsakes from the places he visited on his vacation. Tim later screams into his pillow.

24. Tim has made it his personal mission to figure out who Danny really is, why he's fixated on him, where he came from, ect. Hes trying so hard but can't find anything. Its almost like he didn't exist before. Tim suddenly got an idea after Phantom accidentally got hit in the face and got a nosebleed. Tim saw green blood and immediately realized Danny might not even be human. Fortunately for our little ghost, he thinks he's an alien. A Martian specifically. Tim manages to snag a good sample from treating Phantoms wounds. Ghostboy was so focus on his core thrumming and mentally comparing it to his heart racing that he didn't even notice.

25. Tim later freaks out because the meta is freaking made out of Lazarus water.

The entire batfam was not happy to discover this and decided to work together to pressure Phantom into telling them what he was and what exactly he wanted.

[viburnt]

PUPPY BOY! AU HEADCANONS PT.1

About this AU: Puppy boy! Au is your normal MHA universe with a slight twist. Men possess dog traits (ears, tails, and sometimes large canines), it's hereditary from father to son. Some reactions like tail wagging and perked ears happen, but they have normal lives like any other (mostly, if they like you enough they can give you an “owner” title.)

Still working on this AU please, give feedback 🙏

Kirishima + Pitbull

@angelshimaa come get your dog, bb

• Eijirou is a Pitbull puppy boy, he doesn't have his tail or ears cut like many of his kind, but he does have the eyes an attitude.

• Plenty of people fear him because pitbulls have a bad reputation, but he proves the myth is false by being super kind and loyal! Besides, it's difficult to be scared of him when he welcomes you with such a sweet smile.

• You decided to let him into your life after spending a lot of bonding time with him. It'd be a lie if you said you weren't nervous at first, his pointy teeth were reason enough to be wary. He managed to dissipate any fear, whatsoever, his tail wagging effusively whenever you spoke.

• Like many pitbulls, Kirishima is energetic and loves to exercise, so he constantly drags you to daily jogs and weight-lifting training.

• Did I mention he gives you scary dog privileges? Again, many people associate pitbulls with aggressive behavior, so they think twice before messing with you, specially if he is by your side.

• He is oblivious of his size and weight, and will try to be a lapdog even if his size is not the most practical. “Oh, you are sitting on the couch? Let me just crush you with my weight to cuddle.”

• Not very eager of the idea of being collared like some puppy boys are, but will accept to wear one if you really want him to. Just don't expect him to wear it for long periods.

• It's funny to introduce him with a scary and ominous nickname that contrasts with his kind and gentle personality. “This is my friend Bone crusher planet destroyer” *Kirishima waving his hand happily in the background* “A real menace!”

• Will not hesitate to smother you with PDA if another puppy boy tries to approach you.

“You're home, you're home!” Kirishima said, opening the door for you before you could even finish putting your key in the lock set. You'd only been away for a couple of hours, yet - in Kiri's mind- an eternity had passed. He had missed you so much!

“Hey, buddy, did anyone come while I was gone?” You asked, your hand finding its way to the soft black fur of his ears. It was easy to tell he liked it, specially when his tail wagged so rapidly. “No, no one came - Hey, I smell something on you.” Eijirou pointed out, sniffing your clothes a little. “You were with other men!” He pouted, crossing his arms across his chest.

“Well, it was a party. Of course, there were more people.” You giggled, leaving your bag on the kitchen counter.

Kiri was not having it, his strong arms locking you into a tight embrace. "Now I gotta cuddle you until my scent is there again!" He claimed, throwing you into the couch to cuddle for the rest of the evening. Oh, if only people knew how much of a baby your scary pitbull was!

Dabi + Dobberman

@dabislittlemouse your puppy bites!

• Even if this scary looking dog may seem like some sort of hell hound when your first meet him, he comes from a very selective bloodline after all! His breed would be a Dobberman, with his ears pointy and tail short from being cut at a young age. Also, albino dobbermans have blue eyes! And so you have Touya (white fur) before becoming Dabi (black fur).

• He knows people fears him just by looking at their reactions, and he enjoys it! Dabi wonders, however, why you didn't run away the first time you approached him. He thinks you are very dumb for not being careful around him, but doesn't mind your company at all.

• Hates the idea of an owner but can't help the tail wag whenever you compliment him or do something that he finds exciting. The first time you see that reaction is when you tell him how cool he was!

• Sometimes allows you to see his canines and smirks when he notices how much you like them. Dabi likes to tease by saying "Do you want me to bite you that bad?"

• Dabi IS the definition of scary dog privileges. Looks like he'll bite and WILL bite if someone tries to approach you.

• He also refers to you as "Lady" because, in his eyes, your dynamic with him is similar to the "Lady and the tramp" story... Except the tramp is more of a hurt dog that turned aggressive against everyone except you.

• Won't admit it but enjoys resting his head on your lap whenever you are sitting, this only happens in private though. Bonus points if you caress his hair and ears, you can see the stump of his tail wag!

"Dabi, why are you standing under the rain? You'll get sick!" You worried, watching the man waiting for you outside your workplace. His black spiky hair had turned slick and damp, but his ears remained perked up with attentiveness as he watched you step out of the building. "Just making sure you walk home safe, nothing else." He grunted with his hands inside the pockets of his coat. "There were some drunk fucks a few blocks down."

You pulled out your umbrella and shielded him, "Yeah? Will you put them in their place if they misbehave?" He heard you joke, but the dark smirk he had on his face was enough to tell you an answer. "Who says I didn't take care of them already?"

Your mouth gaped for a moment in both worry and amazement, "Well, as long as they still breath."

"Yeah, they do... I think." Dabi snorted, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and flashing you a grin. "Now, let's get you home."

Bakugo + Chihuahua

@shonen-brainrot Your man is a Chihuahua, can't convince me otherwise

• A lot of people think Chihuahuas are evil, crazy and aggressive rats. Most of the time, they'd be wrong, but in Katsuki's case, the stereotype applies... partially. Chihuahuas are very friendly and social under the right circumstances, but if they get too spoiled or babied, they can develop a rather snarky and corrosive personality! So, on one hand, he is very attentive at home and knows when and where to be cooperative; on the other, if you push his buttons, he won't hesitate to bite.

• He has big fluffy ears, always pointing towards the sky. The tail matches, coated in soft cream fur. Hates when people tries to pet him and will get easily annoyed with baby talk; he is supposed to be scary, not some sort of fashion accessory people could coddle!

• Anxious, but not in the "I will have a mental breakdown and cry" type. He is anxious as in, "I feel vulnerable or attacked in this situation and will maul anyone who tries to approach."

• Like many Chihuahuas, he likes to be treated as a "big dog". Stands all strong and stern, plays rough, and will pick up a fight with people twice his size if he somehow thinks he can win (happens often, no one knows how). Definition of delulu tiny dog, and sometimes needs a reality check.

• Won't use a collar! At least not in a visible way. If you end up being his significant other, he will wear a collar but very subtly.

• Doesn't handle extreme temperatures very well, specially considering his quirk. Give this pup a sweater for God's sake!

"Goddammit, stop touching my damn ears!" Bakugo barked, swatting your hand away from him as you giggled. "Sorry, they're just too cute! Look at them twitch when I poke them." You pointed out, earning a growl from the blond. In a swift movement, he pinned you down on the couch, frowning and baring his teeth to you.

"I'm not your pet!" He huffed but the smirk on your face made his eyes widen in realization: he still was wearing the collar you gave him, tucked underneath the shirt of his uniform. "Relax, I won't do it again, ok?" You assured.

With a flustered face Bakugo let go of you, ears dropping with embarrassment. "Shut up, dumbass..." The blond mumbled, hiding his adorned neck with his clothes. "Has anyone seen it?" You asked curious. "Of course not! And I would kill them if they do." Smiling, you giggled. He was such a grumpy puppy!

[infriga]

I convinced my mom to try the live action One Piece, because she's the type to like this style of show even though she isn't into animation and would never read manga, but I didn't think I'd be able to convince my dad because he's usually a stickler for more grounded and realistic stories (his favourite genre is war movies, his favourite movie is Saving Private Ryan, for reference). But, when I brought up with him how I figured it probably wouldn't be his thing because it was fantasy, he mentioned to me that he does enjoy some fantastical stuff if it has like an internal universe logic, like Star Wars, and the more I thought about it, the more I remembered that he also enjoys campy fun action adventure stuff that doesn't take itself too seriously like Indiana Jones or Pirates of the Carribean.

And One Piece has both that internal logic for why people can perform crazy feats (even if it isn't explained right away) which I mentioned to him (just that there is a reason why people can do crazy things in this world), as well as the campy fun action adventure thing going for it, especially in the Live Action (the fight against Morgan's base even has a major Indiana Jones vibes ngl). So I explained that to him and asked if he wanted to try it, and he agreed to watching the first episode with me to decide if he'd watch it with my mom and me.

AND HE ACTUALLY SAID IT WAS INTERESTING SO FAR!! Like, he is NOT the kinda guy to enjoy anime or manga or even western cartoons, always refuses to watch anything anime and doesn't show any interest when I talk about it (I've managed to convince him to watch a few movies like Sword of the Stranger but it's obvious that even when he's not bored or doesn't hate it, it still doesn't catch or keep his interest), and he's really picky about anything fantasy or SciFi, if it like sets off his bullshit meter too much he starts nitpicking the logic behind certain abilities, or decisions, or explanations, etc. I once tried to get him to try Gravity Falls and he wanted to stop after the first episode. He's THAT picky.

So the fact that he actually laughed several times while watching the first episode of OPLA with me, commented about Luffy's character positively several times (he seems to think Luffy is really funny which surprised me cause I thought he'd be the most entertained by Zoro but I mean I can't blame him it is Luffy after all), never cringed or criticised or said anything about how ridiculous it was, means a lot coming from him cause he's always really blunt and honest about his opinion on this sort of stuff (which is fine I don't want him to pretend to enjoy stuff when he doesn't). He actually watched the whole first episode without it losing his attention, and seemed to have fun! And he agreed to watch the rest with my mom and me!

This sort of thing is one of the reasons why I dislike when people just dismiss the idea of live action adaptations entirely. I get that people are jaded with past failures, and don't like when live action is treated like a replacement for or improvement from animation when it isn't. But it is a valid medium just as much as animation or comics or writing are, and can be used to produce some amazing things. And the fact is, there are people who have a hard time connecting with other mediums who will otherwise never engage with this media in its original forms. Live Action, when done well and done right, can reach new audiences and welcome them into the fold in ways the original formats never can.

One Piece didn't need the live action to be popular, obviously, and the live action cannot and will not replace the original, nor should it. But I love that we get to have it alongside the manga and anime. It's just more of what we love, it's the cherry on top of an already stellar multi-layered cake. It complements the original rather than taking anything away from it. And for the first time in over a decade I might be able to share One Piece with my parents, who would only ever have a chance of experiencing it and enjoying it in live action. There's just something so awesome about that for me personally. I just wish more live action adaptations would understand what the One Piece live action understood about the adaptation process, and that's how to keep the heart of the story in-tact, so more people from more fandoms could have a chance to share something they love with more people who it would otherwise not reach.

Anyway, thank you Oda and the OPLA cast and crew for doing live action right for once!

[orchidyoonkook]

To What We Were Before, And All The Things After | JJK | Ch. 2

Title: Unknown Numbers and Sharp Tongues

Pairing: Prince!College Student!JK x Fine Arts Major!(F)!Reader

Series Rating//Genre: (M) | College AU, Mild Royalty AU, Smut, Angst, Fluff, S2F2L, Indiffernce to lovers, sloooowwww ass burn

Summary: You get a text from an unknown number and it flips your day upside down.

Warnings: PG13, mild swearing, arguments

Word Count: 3065

Release Date: February 2, 2023, 1:40PM

A/N 1: She’s shorter but just as important

Series: Chapter One

It’s 12:07pm the Wednesday after the assembly. You're sitting on your bed sketching when a text vibration sounds from somewhere within the blankets crumpled beneath you. 

A pencil lead stained hand carefully snakes its way through the sheets to find your phone, and after locating it by your feet, you see a message from an unknown number waiting to be read.

Unknown Sender [12:07pm]: Hey, is this YN?

You raise a brow at the semi-suspicious text.

Normally when this happens, you just delete the message. You have everyone you're willing to speak with in your contacts already, so you know that it’s most likely spam. But the difference with this one?

They know your name. 

That being said, your guy friends back home have been known to, on occasion, pull shit because they know you can’t do anything about it. 

Though, that has never once stopped you from waiting to see them again in person and retaliating. Patience is a virtue and all that, but you think they’d of learned by now…

So you fire back, just in case.

You [12:08pm]: Hobi I s2g if this is you again I’m sending Nayeon that picture of you from 9th grade with shutter shades on and your ass stuck in a tuba 

Unknown Sender [12:08pm]: Oh wow, uhm…no, its not Unknown Sender [12:09pm]: But remind me never to get on your bad side.  Unknown Sender [12:10pm]: It’s Jungkook actually... I may have grabbed your number from Yuri’s phone. I hope it’s okay I messaged you 

Jungkook?

As in The Prince of the Western Shores, Jungkook?

Well...

This certainly isn’t how you thought your afternoon was going to go. 

You figured you'd never hear from him again after Monday’s assembly, like everyone else he’d greeted—Yuri aside apparently. Yet here you were, on your bed, in your university dorm room, having a midday text conversation with Prince Jeon Jungkook of all people.

You laugh to yourself and quickly change his name in your contacts, keeping it subtle. You don’t want someone to see his name pop on your screen and then suddenly have a legion of people harassing you about how you got the prince's number, and if they could get it from you. 

You [12:11pm]: yeah, it’s fine

And why wouldn't it be? You don’t dislike him, though he seemed to have thought so. Sure, you don’t particularly like the guy yet, but you're confident he feels the same about you—if he even thinks of you, that is.  

He probably just wants recommendations for things to do this weekend or to know where the cleanest washrooms on campus are. God forbid his royal bottom touch a less than sanitary toilet seat.

PJK [12:13pm]: Im afraid she had to explain to me who ‘blueballzbitch’ was when I accidentally saw your text to her the other day. Apparently my reaction after reading it was very funny

You [12:13pm]: I cant believe she still hasnt changed my name in her phone! That bitch!! she promised :( You [12:14pm]: Thats only my name because i told her she couldnt bring guys back to our dorm after 1 AM anymore! 

PJK [12:14pm]: can I ask why?

You [12:15pm]: there may have been an incident of a very drunk half naked man climbing into my bed at 4 am instead of hers….  You [12:15pm]: And needless to say, not the nicest way to wake up

PJK [12:16pm]: no I would think not. Though that explains her reaction a bit better

You didn’t even want to know. 

She did kick that guy out the second she heard your scream though, drunk as she was. But it didn’t stop her from moping for a week at your new rule.

Tough, you’d had a test the next day, so your decision was final. 

Your academics wouldn’t pay the price for someone else’s actions. On that you were and always have been, firm. You’ve even lost a few friends because of it.

But now your starting to wonder why he wanted to message you in the first place.

You [12:17pm]: i dont mean to be rude, but why did you save my number? To be honest i didnt think I’d hear from you again after monday

PJK [12:18pm]: well if we’re being honest…

There are a million different ways he could follow that sentence, and your mind is simultaneously running through all of them.

It takes him a few minutes, and a couple disappearance and reappearances of the texting in progress bubble, before a reply comes. Your pencil may or may not be a bit chewed on the end as a result.

PJK [12:21pm]: I was hoping that we could be friends, or acquaintances at least. I dont mean to come on too strong, its just that…. well you’re the only one whos really treated me like a regular guy, and i’d like to have at least one person to speak to who wont ‘glaze over the truth with pretty white lies’ just because of who I am. Its a surprisingly hard attribute to come by in people when you have words like “prince” and “your highness” attached to your name PJK [12:22pm]: Everyone either wants something from me or something I can do for them, and when we met? I could see you just…didn’t. It’s like you didnt even care I was there and that was incredibly refreshing for me PJK [12:23pm]: so um, yeah… that’s why

Oh… 

Oh. 

You were expecting anything else. Like literally anything else. He could’ve messaged you saying he wanted to give up being prince to join a traveling circus and was wondering if you knew the quickest train route into town and you would’ve been less surprised than you are right now.

But…Friends? He just wanted to be friends?

You guess you played your part a little too well on Monday. A part you didn't even realize you were performing. 

Was it really so difficult for people to treat him normally that the only person who had done so in three days, was you? And it was so noticeable that he sought you out because of it? His professors, at least, would have treated him like any other student…right?

You sit up, sketch long discarded on your bedside table. 

What would Yuri think about this? What would Nel think? Jungkook isn't just some guy from your Advanced Colour Theory class, he's the prince of your kingdom. 

You know your boyfriend wouldn't care if Jungkook kissed your hand in a passing greeting, that’s the standard greeting for every woman. 

But friends? 

Regular contact? 

Potentially being seen in public with him? 

Even a high ranking societal man would feel threatened, let alone Nel; the highschool boy you fell in love with from your tiny hometown.

Biting your lip, you think. 

You’re not an idiot. You know if people see you—a girl—hanging out with Jungkook—the prince, but more importantly, a boy—publicly, they will start talking. You know how the media make grand stories from two anonymously sourced, out of context quotes and a grainy picture from 100 feet away. 

What you don’t know is if you would or even could handle the public speculation that came with that. 

You don't want the media to come between you and your education. You don’t want to be at the center of attention. You worked way too hard to get where you are to have it washed away with a shitty ‘Prince Jungkook's college fling’ article that holds headlines for less than a week before the news cycle changes. 

Your credibility would be gone in an instant. And you’d only ever be remembered as ‘that girl the prince probably slept with in college.’

You should say no.

You’re going to say no.

—Wait.

Are you even allowed to say no?

Your phone pings again.

PJK [12:24pm]: i really just want my university experience to be as normal as possible before having to trade it all in for a crown and kingdom. It’s my last shot to experience life as a person before becoming a symbol and im hoping youll be kind enough to help me with that  PJK [12:24pm]: but i understand if you dont want to. Like i said in my speech, im not unaware of the repercussions of my celebrity, and its effects on others, both positive and negative. So please by all means, whatever answer you give, i’ll understand

Shit.

Shit!

Now you’ll feel like an ass if you say no, and you know that wasn’t his intention with the message, but you can't help it. He just wants to be as ordinary as he can be for a while. That isn’t a lot to ask—of anybody. 

After re-reading his messages about a dozen more times, you find your entire view of Jungkook shifting in an instant. 

Maybe he was the spoiled, rich, and plate delivered opportunities prince you expected him to be, but funnily enough, somewhere along the way it was you who forgot that he was an regular person. Just like you had told Yuri such a short time ago, and just like you now had to remind yourself. 

Jungkook’s really not much different than someone without all the special features his title brings him.

And with that in mind, you know your reply.

You [12:30pm]: can i think about it?

And not seconds later.

PJK [12:30pm]: absolutely.

A breath you didn’t know you were holding releases.

PJK [12:31pm]: that’s already further than i thought i’d get—if we’re still being honest. 

You [12:33pm]: im always honest, you dont have to worry about that. And same goes for you, dont worry about being truthful with me. Lies only create problems, and i dont have the time for them

PJK [12:35]: glad to hear it. I look forward to your answer, whenever and whatever you decide

Gently tossing your phone back onto your bed, you leave the conversation at that. You know you wouldn’t be able to make your mind up without going through all possible outcomes in your head first. And Yuri is usually a good enough listener to pipe in with decent advice now and then. 

So, for now, you pick up your pencil and sketch pad, and wait for Yuri to return from her afternoon class. 

A few hours later, and a decent way through your third life study, Yuri bursts through the front entryway. Your bedroom door’s open, and you’ve got a clear view of her shucking off her shoes and outer layers after casting her books onto the dining room table. 

So much for your focus. 

But you're glad she’s back, your conversation with Jungkook from earlier is still wracking your brain.

“YN, Sweets! You are NEVER going to believe the day I’ve had!” Yuri makes her way over to your bed, inhaling deeply enough you know a monologue is about to follow.

“Me too! But you first,” you slip in before the floodgates burst, knowing all her focus will be solely centered on you the second you mention Jungkook reaching out. 

“Jungkook invited me to lunch!” 

Or maybe not.

“Well sort of, that’s why I’m late getting back. He asked if there was a more secluded place to eat on campus,” she says the word like it’s a secret. Like she thinks he asked for seclusion to have it be a more intimate setting with her, versus a more private space for him. 

“So I showed him that little cafe behind the greenhouse that no one ever goes to cuz it’s too far away from central campus—you know the one that might as well just be a part of the greenhouse cuz of how close it is?” 

You nod. You were very familiar with that cafe, frequently going there to paint the flowers in the windows, and also, to think. But she doesn’t know that. It was sort of a safe haven for you, because like she said, it wasn’t a very popular place on campus, so it was quiet. 

You didn’t know Yuri even knew about it. 

Now sitting criss-crossed on the end of your bed, she continues, “Yeah, so I brought him there and we both got coffee, then I got a croissant and he got a sandwich. But YN, get this: we take. our coffee. the. same. way. Try and tell me we’re not made for one another now! Same major, same coffee, next thing you know we’ll be finding out we’d picked out the same baby names.” 

She stops to take a breath and you take your cue. “Woah there, Yurls, slow down a bit on that last one,” she makes a face at you. You ignore it. “But I think it’s great you're making a new friend that you have common interests with and are excited about,” you say, putting extra emphasis on ‘friend,’ thinking back to your conversation with Jungkook about people only ever wanting things he could give them. Surely you could subtly help your friend this way. “Just try to remember you have to be friends first before anything else happens.”

She doesn’t miss a beat. “Friends? YN please! We’re practically already dating, that’s three times in as many days he’s asked to hang out,” she closes her eyes, hugging herself. “I can almost hear the wedding bells.”

You look at her plainly and try your best not to sigh. 

She must know that this is just Jungkook taking her up on her offer, right? The one she made after seeing him off to the cafe by the biz-admin building the other day?

Before they parted ways, Yuri’d mentioned to him that if he wanted more inside knowledge or help getting around the campus he could ask her. And it made sense, having all their classes in the same area, when he said, ‘I’ll take you up on that.’

You know, because not unlike this conversation, she’d rushed home right after to tell you. 

Jungkook’s just trying to get his bearings in what is clearly still a very new experience for him and Yuri’s reading into it all wrong. 

You look at your friend who’s staring dreamily at nothing, more than likely caught up in whatever wedding scenarios of herself and Jungkook her brain is creating. 

Waving a fruitless hand in front of her face before snapping your fingers, you break her trance. “Helloooo? Earth to Yuri, come back down here please so I can talk some sense into youuuuu.” 

“I’m here,” she says, smacking your hand away playfully, gaze snapping to your less than amused one. Her smile falters at the sight. “What’s that look for?”

“Oh nothing, just that you sound like a delusional teenager instead of a functional adult at university pursuing a degree. You just met the guy three days ago and you’re already picturing your wedding together? Because you hung out over coffee twice and showed him where his classes are? He’s still a stranger, Yuri. Can’t you hear yourself?”

Her expression quickly changes to one of offense, and maybe even hurt. 

Perhaps you’d been a little too honest, but it’s not like this was new for you two. Sometimes she needed a swift blow to knock her down and she knows this, she knows you’d never intend to hurt her feelings. You always wanted what was best for her, and you know she feels the exact same way for you. 

So you’re shocked when she says, “You know you don’t have to be such a bitch about it if you’re going to be jealous,” crossing her arms defensively.

Jealous? You are anything but jealous, and you wonder why that’s where her mind jumps to first, brows scrunching in confusion.

“I’m not jealous. Have you forgotten about Nel? Boyfriend of five years, highschool sweetheart, ringing a bell?”

“Nel’s not a prince YN,” she counters in a tone so even, it’s unsettling. “And it wouldn’t be so unheard of for a woman in a relationship to be jealous of her friend who’s in one with a prince she wants for herself.” 

Oh, so that’s where she wants to go with this. She thinks that Jungkook will somehow make you forget about the five wonderful years with Nel. Like half a decade measures up to nothing if it means getting someone with a better name and a bigger paycheck. 

Fine.

If she wants to get bitchy about it, so will you. 

“Yeah, well it’s a good thing you’re not dating one then, isn’t it? Don’t get so defensive when all I’m doing is trying to help you see that.”

Yuri stands dramatically from the bed, clearly pissed, and storms out of your room, grabbing her things from the dining room table.

“I’m going to my macroeconomics class. By the time I get back, either have your door closed, or don’t be here.”

She leaves as rushed as she came, and you try not to flinch at the front door slamming shut, but do anyway. 

You shove your work off to the side, bringing your knees up to rest your elbows on while the palms of your hands cover your eyes, giving yourself a moment to breathe and process. 

This isn’t the first time this has happened and it certainly won't be the last. It was a downside between your personalities. You were the anchor who kept her from soaring too high in the clouds, just like she was the helium that kept you from drowning. 

But sometimes she wanted to see the stars, and sometimes you were scared of the surface. 

Releasing a deep breath, you decide to head out, having finished school for the day anyway. You only had morning classes on Wednesdays—an intentional scheduling on your behalf to have somewhat of a break midweek. You work hard but also know that burnout can kill.

Switching out your pencils for watercolour paint trays, and your sketchpad for your watercolour paper, you decide that the greenhouse sounded great right about now, especially now that you knew Yuri wouldn’t be there. 

There isn’t a better place for you to go and blow off some steam. 

Tossing your brushes, materials, travel water and wallet in a tote, you slide on your shoes and leave the dorm. The door closes much quieter this time. 

Chapter Three: Greenhouse Muses and Surprise Guests

A/N 2: I’m pretty sure this is the shortest chapter in the series (so far) but as you’ve read it’s an important step so I hope that’s okay!

<- Back

[holewithinahole]

The Spirit’s in It | Egon Spengler x nb!reader [3/3]

Summary: “I didn’t know psychology doctors also specialized in particle physics, is all.”

What you meant as a light joke to relax him did quite the opposite. He straightens, righting up his glasses one more pointless time. “I have a degree in nuclear engineering,” he states before walking out, leaving you confused and feeling like you’ve spent the entire time offending him unintentionally.

Warnings: angst, non-native writer, non-beta’d

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

And here’s the end. I apologise in advance. It's funny despite how aromantic I am how I'm the best at romanticising relationships lmao. I wanted to explore how romantic relationsips are inherently different for neurodivergent people, especially ppl on the autism spectrum. Yeah...

The end is pretty cliché and I kinda hate it but hey, I live for the tropes. I'm gone, bye! Thank for reading this to its end!

At first, you haven’t been able to swing by the Ghostbusters headquarters as much as you would’ve liked, too busy assisting students for future exams. As Egon predicted, psychokinetic energy has kept rising in New York, meaning the three of them were called all the time to assist here and there. Their secretary – Janine Melnitz you learned when Egon introduced you, has been looking more and more like a ghost herself, and you were sincerely impressed by how much energy she still managed to conjure to send people away. All of that resulted in the hiring of a new member of the team, Winston Zeddmore, a gentle soul of a man who took the place of Egon on the field. It’s often easy to read: ‘I didn’t sign up for this bullshit’ on his face, but he’s resilient and hardworking which is everything the Ghostbusters could have needed and more.

A week after your fresh new meeting, you ended up telling Egon and Dr. Stantz about their research papers stored at your place. The latter had been delighted and thanked you profusely. The retrieval had gone without any incident, although you did notice the baffled look that passed between the two of them when they saw the several towers of boxes. (There had been a discreet comment from Egon questioning humans’ propensity to stack things.)  

Why you ended up at Egon’s place you have no idea. Well, you do know how – most of the files were his after all and you couldn’t let Dr. Stantz handle the walking up five flights of stairs on his own. Plus, Egon wanted to look back at some old papers of his; something about a new plan of approach concerning the storage facility issue. So, there you stood, looking around awkwardly as Dr. Stantz retrieved the last box downstairs. It was a simple apartment, messy and not intended to be anything more than an occasional place to sleep – or, surprisingly, a fungus breeding farm.

Your questioning gaze certainly didn’t go unnoticed. “I collect spores and fungi,” he explained.

“Neat.” You didn’t really think before you carried on, “Is that why you studied microbiology?”

“…amongst other things,” Egon said, looking slightly surprised. “I didn’t realize you knew.”

“Uh,” you trailed off. “I’ve read your papers.”

“All of them?”

Can it get any more embarrassing than that? “…might have.”

He didn’t answer and you thanked him internally for it. The visit was short and to the point, Egon clearly looking uncomfortable having other people trespass into his space. That’s what you kept telling yourself anyway, not especially fond of diving back into the whole ‘I’m an embarrassment to myself, him, and society’ spiral.

In itself, routine didn’t change much. You kept doing most of your research at the university, exchanging with the different professors of the lab, giving your opinions on the students’ ongoing thesis and avoiding Dean Yaeger. Then, you’d meet with the doctors after work to discuss the improvements of the containment facility. But the more the days went by, the more Egon’s temper seemed to flare. Not in the usual, explosive or passive-aggressive nature but in the dwindling of words, and the psychosomatic tremor of his eyelid. You hadn’t been truly able to understand why, when, or how.

Which led you to your actual predicament.

“I don’t think it’ll work, Egon.”

Sitting at a desk, you scratch an equation, staring dejectedly at the example of ‘ionization radiation decay meter’ Egon sketched. The man himself has taken his glasses off and pressed his eyes to alleviate his migraine. “We’ll have to include the system later,” he concedes, looking crossed. “I have to analyze today’s samples.”

After downing the cup of cold coffee you forgot on the desk with a disgusted grimace, you slouch on your chair. You watch Egon from the corner of your eye, busy staring and typing on his computer. He lets out an uncharacteristic annoyed noise.

“Not good?” you ask.

“Like I thought, it’s exponential.” He sighs. “Two days ago, PKE was three times less important than today.”

“Something big on the horizon.”

“Yes,” he says.

This tense atmosphere has you overly cautious as if one wrong word could make this artificial veil of normalcy shatter. It makes your skin crawl, inadequately feeling like your mere presence is making things worse. Leaving his computer behind to sit on the couch, he browses through the results he printed. His tiredness is noticeable even from where you are. You’re about to say something when Venkman comes waltzing in, his energy clashing with the general atmosphere of the room, which he notices immediately.

“Well, well,” he says in a singsong tone. “Who are we burying today?”

Egon doesn’t grace him with an answer, only with a glare before looking back at his results.

“It’s been a long day, I guess,” you answer truthfully to loosen the tension.

Venkman, always in theatrics, opens his arms wide. “Look who we’ve got here! Hello there.” He has his usual smirk on. “You’ve been hanging ‘round here more often.”

“Hello, Dr. Venkman.” You smile. “Just trying to help Egon.”

“And why aren’t we on a first-name basis?”

You certainly don’t voice aloud that you don’t want to give him any ideas, which he gets well enough on his own. Egon, for its part, is frowning so hard his eyebrows have merged with the frame of his glasses. You can almost imagine a big molten hole where his eyes are boring through the paper.

“Egon kindly proposed,” you explain.

“Wow, you guys,” Venkman exclaims. You frown at him, confused. “Congrats, Spengie! Don’t forget the invitation.”

This snaps Egon out of his sulking trance, face hardening at Venkman’s inappropriate comment.

“He kindly offered,” you interject, trying your best to look unfazed at the innuendo and to avoid an act of crime against humanity. “You, however, take everything for granted.”

Venkman whistles – which makes you want to strangle him – but at least Egon doesn’t look like he’s going to jump at his throat from across the room anymore.

“Damn, snarky today, uh? Let’s start over then.” Despite his mocking tone, he walks near you and extends a hand that you look at dubiously. “Hi, the name’s Peter.”

A small part of you doesn’t want to shake his hand, just to rile him up but you still do. Strangely enough, there’s an endearing quality to his man, when he wants to.

“Nice to meet you, Peter.”

The man lets out a pleased chuckle. “Now, now, I’m not trying to get you two to leave but this man–” He tugs at his collar. “–has a date tonight and he will be singing in the shower. So, if you want some peace and quiet, now would be a good time to go play in the basement.”

You scoff. “You’ve got a date.”

Venkman seems either completely oblivious or completely disinterested in your tone. “With a sweet creature called Dana Barrett.”

“Don’t forget to ask her about Zuul, Peter,” Egon says, snapping out of his good ten minutes of selective mutism.

Venkman disappears into their common room. “Did I say date?” he shouts. “I meant work meeting.”

True to his words, he starts singing a bad rendition of Queen of Hearts, making sure to annoy the whole building. Even if it grates on your nerves, it’s fascinating to witness this clutter of a place, with such different personas stacked on top of each other. You’ve never heard the story of how the three of them ended up being best buddies and judging by Egon’s closed-up face, today wouldn’t be the day you ask.

After five minutes of excruciating vocalizations, he puts down his results, standing up from the couch. You eye him curiously. “Where’ you going?”

“The basement.”

You frown, standing up. “You know; I don’t think he was serious.”

“I have readings to do downstairs,” he answers shortly.

He walks towards the stairs but stops, pivoting slightly towards you without meeting your eyes. The prickling sensation at the back of your brain is back. You can’t wrap your head around the contrast between his high-strung demeanor and his unspoken invitation to follow him. The confusion suddenly feels too heavy.

“Egon.” He looks up and you’re not expecting the flatness of his expression, how detached he’s looking. “Are you angry?”

It sounds stupid in your own ears, a ridiculous childish question but it’s out of your mouth before you can think about it. Words are wonderful incentives, you think, but sometimes, they just end up pushing people away.

Egon frowns, still not entirely facing you. “No.”

“Then–”

Venkman comes back into the room, whistling loudly. “Still there, lovebirds?”

You turn to answer him but you’re cut off by the loud steps of Egon hurtling down the stairs, leaving you staring dumbly at the invisible trail he left behind. There’s an uncomfortable silence as you frown, heart beating loudly for a reason you can’t really pinpoint. Venkman stands there, undoubtedly conscious of having said the wrong thing.

“Don’t worry, he’s cranky when he doesn’t have his nap.”

You decide to simply gather your belongings and leave. “I’ll come back in a few days.”

Even if Venkman offers to buy you a taxi, you decide to use the subway and as you stare without seeing at the dirty walls of New York’s underground tunnels, you realize that perhaps you’re starting to care a little too much.

Just a tad too much.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Awakening of Gozer

Perhaps you shouldn’t have gone home that day.

For when you heard that in less than twenty-four hours, the Ghostbusters headquarters exploded and that a cloud of psychokinetic energy appeared above Manhattan, you felt that ‘are you angry’ were stupid words to say to somehow you might never see again.

You stand in front of your TV as journalists follow the Ghostbusters’ car through the streets of New York, crowd in a standing ovation. You feel restless as you look through your window, watching the sky turning dark and the full-blown light show the ghosts seem to be throwing downtown. Even when the black clouds dissipate – reminding everyone that it was barely three in the afternoon, you stare, left leg bouncy, at the screen for the final cry of the crowd, hoping, praying, that it’d be of joy.

You’re not truly sure of the feelings rushing through you when they leave this building, dirtied but alive. As soon as you see their proud faces, you turn off the TV, and lay down on the couch, breathing deeply. You close your eyes and contemplate the labyrinth of paths life could have taken in the last two hours. When ten p.m. rolls out, you stand up, driven by some unknown force out of your apartment. Somehow, the sky still holds the purple hues of the paranormal manifestation that plagued New York this evening, ribbons of ghost energy glowing like winter lights and casting discreet colors on the buildings. Tomorrow, you’ll look back at the usual grayish streaks of pollution and everything will feel like a long fever dream.

It’s silly the way the heart and the brain latch on to these human connections like they’re starving. It’s unfortunate, truly. Unfortunate how walking through the chill of the busy streets leads you to his place; a sanctum at the top of a dirty building. And it’s scary how unable you are to stay away, – now and every day – especially when emotions are all over the place; fear in your stomach, anxiety in your loins, need – this unshakable need — in your heart: terrible, voracious, heavy in your limbs as you drag your exhausted body up the stairs. Knocking on the door is, weirdly enough, more nerve-wracking than having witnessed their improbable excursion on television. Egon opens the door, all intrigued eyes and furrowed brows; dressed so casually it seems unreal.

“I know it’s not the time, and that you don’t like people in your space,” you mumble. “But I was— “

Egon steps away from the doorway, inviting you in silently, and it’s almost reluctantly that you step inside. It’s dimly lit but you notice opened notebooks on his table next to three empty mugs.

“Was I interrupting?” you ask, already knowing the answer.

“No,” Egon answers to your surprise. “I was only writing down what happened tonight.”

You hum. “I saw it on TV.”

He gestures to you to take a seat. From your chair, you can see Egon busying himself with his small fungus farm, touching the caps of his mushrooms with the tips of his fingers. “You know; I think you deserve a rest, after saving the city and all.”

“I believe we saved the world.”

The emphasis doesn’t go unnoticed. You chuckle nervously, having found a deep interest in a stain on the floor. “I wonder if your Sumerian God would have been able to conquer the world as a hundred-foot-tall marshmallow man.”

“Gozer is a powerful entity,” he says. “They would have brought the apocalypse on our world.”

“But now it’s gone, eh?” The unusual silence makes you look up at him.  

“We’ve only destroyed a vessel and a portal. There might be more somewhere.”

“Well…” You try to rationalize. “Good thing the Ghostbusters will always be there.”

Egon stills, staring without looking as if he’s debating inside: is it true? Will it be true? Will I do anything to honor this promise? You decide to drop the subject.

“So, how does one destroy the portal of a God? ’Sounds like a lot of molecular bounds to break.”

“We crossed the streams.”

You freeze.

“…I thought you shouldn’t do that, like ever.” It’s easier to fake some lightheartedness in your tone than to face how a simple slip of fate could have made this improvised late-night meeting impossible.

“It did work.”

It’s harder to swallow as if he could suddenly vanish in front of your very eyes, taken away by some dark entity; as if every single particle of his being could disappear forever as they annihilate their counterpart. A total protonic reversal, that’s what Dr. Stantz had said. You unwillingly explore this possibility: how you, safely at home, wouldn’t have known about their utter and complete destruction until the ridiculous vessel of a Sumerian God turned on the city and brought the apocalypse upon the world. Perhaps after a few hours, perhaps after a day, you would have accepted the fact that they had lost. Or you’d have watched an explosion of unimaginable scale, staring blindly at the death of thousands of people and the loss of what became a constant in your life.

You stand up, trying to get rid of the restless energy that has been buzzing underneath your skin for two days now.

“Oh yes, proton-antiproton collisions are usually effective at killing everything around.” You sigh, trying to squash down the trembling in your voice, leaning against his desk. “Even if you weren’t already dead by the annihilation of your own molecules, the explosion would have finished the job.”

But it’s pointless to remind him of what he already knows. Egon still faces his farm but his mechanical movements have stopped. You say, “You’re more of a jackass than I thought.”

“The chances of surviving were low, I’ll admit.”

“No shit,” you mutter lowly. “Bless the uncertainty principle.”

His small cocky smile is an unexpected but welcomed sight. “Quantum theory has never been truly challenging for me.”

It startles a laugh out of you. “You might want to revise your judgment, then.”

Putting down whatever kind of instrument he has been using, he walks closer and leans on the spot next to you; an unusual decision, perhaps even an unspoken attempt at consolation. It’s funny because you’ve never stood this close, ever. There’s always been something between you: a room, a desk, Venkman, your apprehension, his awkwardness… As his shoulder brushes against yours, your heart soars with uneasiness but as soon as you let your bubble of comfort merge with his, it becomes the most natural thing in the world. Only then, at this very instant, does your heartbeat finally slow down, does the gnawing sensation at the pit of your stomach dissipate… leaving you to wonder when it’ll all pop.

“You haven’t told me the purpose of your visit,” Egon says after some time, always traveling the universe at the speed of light.

“Ah yes.” There it is. “I was restless.” He looks at you intently. “It just occurred to me that our last meeting hasn’t been entirely— agreeable.”

You stare at the ground. “I would have preferred not to have left on bad terms.”

“You were worried I wouldn’t come back.” It sounds like an epiphany.

He says ‘I’ and not ‘we’, and you would have liked for his social ineptitude to take a step forward for once, and not his ridiculously sharp sense of observation.

“Well… It’s normal, isn’t it?”

He doesn’t answer. You wish for the world to be ‘normal’ again, or at least the isolated system of your mental landscape. The disruption in the former entity of your thoughts morphs your behaviors, your habits, making you a slave to the random bursts of emotions you’d like to see buried. This energy stays right there, bound by thermodynamics and your fixations. Perhaps this PKE, this conscience energy is the reason for it all.

“I’m afraid that all of this–” You make a half-hearted movement of the arm. “–will disappear.”

“The world?” He asks.

“No. Yes. I mean…“ You swallow. “Here, right now. I’m afraid I’ll wake up in the morning to realize that it’s all gone.”

“I don’t think reality will end during the night.”

You don’t feel like expanding on those uncomfortable feelings so you entertain the idea. “We were about to be wiped out by a God from distant times. If ghosts are proof of anything, it’s that time is meaningless. It could very well end in a few hours.”

Egon doesn’t answer. You let out a sigh. “It’s irrational.”

“Perhaps,” he says after some time. “But fears usually are.”

“People usually fear tangible things, like, I don’t know, ghosts.”

“Ghosts aren’t material per se–”

You chuckle, looking at him. “I knew you’d say that.”

It’s complicated, this situation; how his literal words comfort you in unsuspected ways. It should be annoying, saddening even, to harbor such feelings for someone who lives miles away in his own head of equations, schematics and paranormal theories. You question your behavior, wondering if, in the end, he’s not just another new thing to fixate upon, if he’s not just another unanswered question on your long list of interrogations about life, the universe and everything. If that’s the case then, you can just move on.

“It’s late,” he states.

Perhaps, you can move on. “Yes, I’m gonna go.”

You gather your bag, breaking the fallacy of closeness you had. If the painful torpor your heart is in is any indication, is that it – whatever it is – goes beyond a fixation, but you don't want to confront any of this...

“Goodbye, Egon.”

…unless it’s to run away.

It’s a goodbye, you convince yourself, pushed closer by a disillusioned thought and a hint of desperation. On his face, you can read a plethora of interrogations, each for one flicker of a lid, for one shift of an eye; unique movements as his body stays right in place. It spurs you on, makes you cross the remaining distance between you. And as you place your hand on his arm to not buckle under the pressure, you give a single kiss; a furtive indulgence at the corner of his lips. Something that could be more, something that could be nothing.

You haven’t meant to meet his eyes, but it all seemed inescapable when he didn’t even close them in the first place while you hid safely behind the opaque screen of your lids. It’s confusion, likely a little bit of recoil… You burn brighter from a single kiss, a torch shining a little light on him too, but as adrenaline slips away, you’re faced with darkness again. There’s nothing you can fault him for as it’s your own two legs that took you there in the first place. It’s your own weak heart that pushed you up those stairs as everything else was dragged down by gravity.

You’re out of his apartment as quickly as you can. You know that if you abuse this kindness, your wider smile and warmer face will be the devil’s work; the consequence of pillaging of benevolence you wouldn’t be able to bring yourself to stop. Even with genuine motions, his telltale beat will never follow yours, and even the strongest, wildest embers won’t alienate it faster. You will be a parched man facing a mirage, a moth to an ephemeral flame that will love everything until it’s consumed. But a flame doesn’t love back and love is a sin for the ones that feel it the most.

The next day, the sky is back to its usual color.

[mekkatoniks]

Alright y'all, first Sunnyblr post but this one is real important to me because it includes both something that is threatening TO ME as a writer and also something I see as mischaracterization which is something I despise. My apologies if I can't put this together in a better way, I feel real anxious right now lmao. You may have seen the clip, maybe two, of Glenn talking about AI. This has caused a major reaction, originally down on Twitter (bcs. of course) and I guess I'm here to provide the whole thing, in writing.

First thing's first I wanna reassure you that Glenn did not use AI in the writers room. He views AI as a threat.

I watched the whole interview when it came out and here's the summary: He says he was personally surprised by the quality of the AI at writing jokes, some time after Matt expresses that he doesn't view ChatGPT/AI to be "good enough" to really interfere with writers (may have to check up on this wording). They did not use this material in the show. Charlie and Glenn did this only to test it. This follows by him saying he thinks we're gonna get to a point where eventually we'll have to accept the way things are going (at the point we're at already I think we can't really fight AI here, but put protections in place for writers against AI and its improper usage, so using it to solely generate ideas, using it as a replacement for writers as a whole, etc), that it's a tool people will have to learn to use, but that ultimately there'd still need to be at least one human in the room to curate it all because there's never really going to be a fully finished product (which isn't an endorsement of that type of heavy AI usage, seems more like an observation and that AI will always still have limits).

Jay continues from this saying that even if it does create a fully finished product, there'll still be the appetite for people to tell stories to other people, and that for every big shift it stays the same. Jay is also in agreement that it'd be a tool but that it isn't something to be scared of, just more aware of; he doesn't view it as a threat. Glenn replies that he does view it as a threat and continues to talk cynically about it, saying we could be close to having just one guy and then your writers room is entirely chatbots (this is not spoken as a good thing obviously. It's kinda comedic but there's truth in it especially for cynical people I suppose). Matt makes a joke about that being Glenn's dream and Glenn laughs about it (it was pretty fucking funny) and is like "i'm a bit misanthropic ur right lol". When Matt begins speaking again Glenn jumps in to say that he is not saying that it's a good thing, which is more likely to be in reference to AI as well. At the end of the question Jay says he stands with the WGA and Glenn agrees. That is all that is said in that portion of the interview. So I suppose the end point is... he doesn't support AI, certainly not to the extent some are making it seem.

I get major anxiety when it comes to things like this - as in, people reacting to something in a way that indicates they have misinterpreted or don't have the full thing or anything like this, it legitimately makes me feel sick. I can understand people's reactions at least because AI is a threat! That's why the WGA wants protections for writers from the improper usage of AI, because they've drawn similar conclusions and want to prevent it. Fuck, I'm a writer. I of all people would understand how this affects anything. But this specific situation is not one that really calls for the type of reaction it has received? It's gotten to a point where people have started attacking him for real petty reasons like appearance because of it. It's immature, unnecessary, and really just low.

If I've had the most uncritical thinking moment in the whole universe and you think there's something really wrong with the way I have viewed the situation, that I've been the one to misinterpret it, then please be civil about it. Or even if there's a point you want to just bring up. Due to issues I have, I avoid posting about a lot of things because I'm always focused on getting things right and the idea that I may be getting it wrong, in a space where people can see (and let's be honest there's always a chance of seeing the most vile shit in response and I feel anxious over it for days which is unhealthy), is distressing to me. But I'm slowly putting myself out there lol, I mostly just came here to give comfort to anyone or assuage much of their anxiety as possible. I do not at any point want to look like I'm dickriding but this is something I feel has truly been perceived wrong by a lot of people! I think the timing of everything, being asked that question and answering it during the strike, has definitely contributed to a lot of this and tension is high for a lot but I genuinely think Glenn's answer as well as Jay's were nuanced for the time they had to answer it (they can't go on too long) and I appreciate that. Thank you for reading!

[skulduggery-pleasant-bp9]

Playing with a Coroner and a Detective is not wise - Skulduggery x Male!Reader Universe

Part 9 – The Vault

As they were outside, Ghastly and Skulduggery had their disguises back on and stared at something. M/n looked around quickly, but in a way, no one noticed, while his Sister started to panic. Then he saw the man and he pointed at him for Stephanie.

The man came to them, like he had all the time in the world. Stephanie came closer to her Brother’s side, who, was very close to Skulduggery. He looked at his Sister and gave her a calming smile. She didn’t return it.

“Mr. Pleasant, Mr. Bespoke..”, greeted the man as he reached them.

“Mr. Bliss”, they greeted back.

Stephanie inspected the man. He radiated out power. His pale blue eyes looked at her and M/n seemed to stiffen up slightly. Then his eyes went to M/n.

“And you two must be the siblings, which all the people are suddenly interested in.”

Stephanie couldn’t make a sound. She didn’t know, what she should have said, but she knew, her voice would have sounded high and thin, if she would have tried to speak. This Mr. Bliss had something on him, that awakened in her the wish, to get very small and cry.

M/n felt her unease and stepped in between her and Bliss, shielding her from him.

“Hey, whatever you are doing, stop it, yeah ? My Sister is at unease and that is not funny. If you use some stupid spell like this China, then stop it.”, M/n growled out slightly.

Mr. Bliss chuckled and looked at him.

“It don’t work on me, Sir.”, M/n deadpanned.

“Interesting...”

“I haven’t seen you in a while. I’ve heard, you have withdrawn from business.”, Skulduggery said, distracting all three of them.

M/n hated Mr. Bliss’ eyes. They seemed as empty as a void. No emotion left in them. He looked at Skulduggery.

“The Elders asked me to come back. We live in a time, full of restlessness.”

“Really ?”, Ghastly asked.

“The two men, that were watching Serpine, were reported missing two days ago. He is up to something, that the Elders aren’t supposed to know of.”

Skulduggery thought about that.

“Why didn’t Meritorius tell me anything ?”

“The truce is a card house, Mr. Pleasant. One little disruption, and everything falls into itself. And you are well known to make disruptions. The Elders hoped, that my interference would be enough of a scare, but I fear, they underestimated Serpine’s determination. They refuse to believe, that someone else could benefit from another war. And of course,, do they still believe, the Sceptre of Ancients, as a Fairytale.”

M/n looked at Bliss in confusion and wonder.

“So, you think the Scepter is real too ?”, he asked.

He looked at M/n.

“Oh, I know that it exists. If it can do all the things, that were told in the Legends, I don’t know, but as an object does the Sceptre very well exist. It was discovered in the youngest past, by archaeological excavations. As much as I know, did Gordon Edgley pay a high amount of cash, to get it into his possession, because it was a part of his researches for a book about the Faceless Ones. I think, he was determined to prove its sincerity, and after he succeeded, did he realize, that he can’t keep it, nor give it away. Gordon Edgley was with all his mistakes a good man, and if he had to assume, that the Sceptre had the destructible abilities, from which we’ve heard of, he surely had the feeling, that no one should own it, because it was too powerful.”

Stephanie found her voice now.

“Do you know, what he did with it ?”, she asked.

“No.”

“But you believe that Serpine is ready, to risk another war ?”, Skulduggery asked.

Mr. Bliss nodded.

“I think, in his eyes the truce did serve its purpose, yes. I can only imagine, that he waited for this moment for a while now, to seize the power, to uncover all secrets and get the Faceless Ones back here.”

“YOU believe in the Faceless Ones ?”, Stephanie asked.

“Oh yes. I grew up with that knowledge and I kept my belief in them since. Some of us just abandon the Stories, which are told about the Faceless Ones, others see them as educating fables and again others see them as bedtime stories for children. But I believe in them. I believe, that we were ruled by other entities once, which were so unbelievably evil, that even their shadows fled from them. And I believe, that they waited very long for their return, so they can punish our infraction.”

Skulduggery crooked his head.

“The Elders would listen to you.”

“You have to play by their rules. I found out, what I could, and gave all my knowledge to the only person, that knows, what to do with it. Everything else is up to you.”, Bliss replied.

“With you on our side, everything would be way easier.”, said Ghastly.

A small smile ran over Bliss’ face.

“When I have to step in, I will.”, he replied.

Without a ‘Good day’ he turned around and left. They stayed rooted there for a while until Stephanie spoke.

“He somehow was scary.”

“That’s what happens, when you barely smile. Mr. Bliss is, purely physically speaking, the strongest man on this planet. His strength tops everything.”

“So he is actually really scary ?”, she asked.

“Oh yes, very.”, Skulduggery confirmed.

They went to their cars.

“What do you think ?”, she asked Ghastly and Skulduggery as they arrived at the cars.

Skulduggery shrugged his shoulders, while Ghastly looked in deep thought.

“A lot of smart things.”, the Skeleton answered.

“Do you also think, the Sceptre is real ?”

“It seems so.”, Skulduggery said.

“If Mr. Bliss said it exists and that it was recently found too, then I do believe him. Bliss wouldn’t lie about that.”, Ghastly replied.

“So we have to get going and take a look at your collectibles now, right ?”, M/n asked.

Ghastly nodded.

“Why ?”, Stephanie asked her Brother.

M/n turned to her.

“Get your phone out and call me. We will drive to wherever Ghastly’s collectibles are and I will explain.”

She nodded and they got in. Then his Sister called him and he accepted, then turned on the speaker.

“Turn on the speaker.”

“Already done.”

“Okay, Skul, you drive first, so I just have to follow. Now listen, Sister. As this Bliss guy said, the Elders deny that there is anything wrong. They are too scared to do anything from assumptions and accusations only. They want evidence. We know now that Uncle G had the Sceptre last and that was most definitely the reason he was murdered. We need proof that it exists, so we need to find it and get our hands on it first, for that we need to find the key, which we still don’t know its location of. Last, but not least, we have to destroy it. We have to make the Sceptre nonexistent, and for that to happen, we need to go to Ghastly’s family’s collectibles, look through everything and try and find answers. There must be something that can tell us how to destroy it.”, M/n explained while they drove on the road.

“Okay...why do I have a feeling you are keeping something from me ?”, she asked suspiciously.

“Because I am thinking. Bliss said that two spies, which were on Serpine’s ass, went missing two days ago, just like that. I think I have to pay a visit to my workplace and ask my Boss about recently found corpses. I want to find out, if they accidently came into our hands. I will also have to re – inspect Uncle G’s body. I want to make sure that he was murdered and if yes, what I have to look for and if I can draw the same murderer to all three corpses, if the spies are there. That counts as evidence too, doesn’t it ? But I will need other people as my Team. I can’t work with my old Team on that. If they see anything suspicious, they will report it and I can’t make up so many lies that I will lose sight of my own truths.”

“But wasn’t Uncle embalmed ? That means everything is out, right ? Blood and everything.”, his Sister asked.

“Sis, I forbid them to do that, for this exact reason. The blood and everything is still there, which also means I will have to work with the stench the body will emit, but I have no other choice and it wouldn’t be my first time dealing with that either. Trust me, I know what I am doing.”

“God, Uncle hopefully won’t haunt you as a ghost.”

M/n sighed heavily.

“Like I said, if he decides to curse me, for disturbing him, so be it. I HAVE to figure this out.”

“Do you really think you have to do that, Corrupted ?”, Skulduggery asked.

“Yes, I do. We need all the evidence we can get, to wake those old people up from slumber land, so let me do, what I can. I didn’t study Autopsy for nothing.”

“Very well then.”, Skulduggery gave in.

Then there was a short moment of silence.

“How many people do you need ?”, Skulduggery asked M/n.

“At least three. Why ?”, M/n asked.

“I have someone in mind...”

“Who ?”

“Kenspeckle Grouse. He is a doctor and very smart. He might be able to help you. I would like to join too.”, Skulduggery answered.

“Maybe I should join too then.”, Ghastly mixed in.

“If you all go there, then I will too.”, Stephanie said.

“Sister, you won’t come along. You are twelve years old, for fucks sake. You don’t want to see cut open bodies and how I take out organs and run tests on everything. God, Mom would KILL me if she finds out that I let you even WATCH a series about such things ! You would get nightmares. Forget it.”

“I want to come along, if you won’t let me, I will tell Mom your actual job !”, Stephanie threatened.

M/n froze at that and glared at the road.

“IF you come along, you WILL listen to me, understand ? You disobey me and I will ground you for a long while. You got that ?”, he said darkly.

“Yep !”, she chirped.

“Good.”

“But how are Skulduggery and Ghastly going to hide their faces ?”, she asked.

“Let that be my worry. I have an idea.”, M/n replied with a smile.

Then he hung up and they continued to drive.

“What have you planned ?”, Ghastly asked.

M/n smiled.

“I never tested them on Mages before, so don’t expect it to work without flaws. Maybe I need to adjust a few things, but...I made something that project illusions over your body. The device is small and has a good battery. It can stay alive for over 12 hours, before you have to charge it again. I am unsure of what to call them yet. Maybe ‘cover up devices’ or something. You’ll love them, if they work.”

“Alright...but they won’t explode, right ?”

“They won’t.”, M/n replied, laughing.

“Then I am willing to try them out.”

“Good. Oh ! And please don’t tell my Sister that I am tinkering on stuff like this. It is bad enough that she knows that I am a Coroner. She doesn’t need to know that I am crafting stuff too...”, M/n muttered.

“Because she will blackmail you ?”

“Yep, one of the many things. The other would be her constantly asking me, to make her something she can gloat about... No thank you. As much as I love her, she can’t always expect ME to do everything.”

“Tough love, eh ?”, Ghastly asked with a chuckle.

M/n chuckled too.

“Very tough love.”, he confirmed jokingly.

“What else can you do ? You studied Autopsy, what else ?”, Ghastly asked.

“You will keep it a secret from everyone ?”, M/n asked back.

“Sure will. Now spill the tea.”

M/n chuckled.

“Officially I had three scholarships. One was Autopsy, the other was Mechanic and the last one was Robotics. I wanted to test myself, I suppose. I did all three of them at once and Uncle Gordon supported me. He was the ONLY one who knew. He arranged everything and all my scholarships were scheduled in one day. After I came home late at evening, I studied all three things at once, let Gordon test me and then I got, if I was lucky, at least two hours of sleep. I never really felt stressed or tired, even though I should have. At weekends I studied hard and slept longer, catching up on my sleep, but still, it should have been terrible, yet, it was entirely relaxing to me.”

Ghastly looked at M/n in awe.

“Wow, respect, Corrupted.”, Ghastly complimented.

M/n chuckled.

“What else did you do ? You said these three were ‘Official’. Was there anything that was unofficial ?”

“I mean, my driving license was. I learned sewing a bit too. I learned first aid and how to help in absolute emergencies, like, someone is bleeding out, I know how to slow it down properly. I studied a bit of medicine, I studied chemicals and liquids. I studied a lot in books, used rarely the Internet, and put my knowledge to tests. All of this, Gordon was aware of. He got me the books, he explained things I didn’t fully understand and he helped in a few things. Heck, he even taught me how to fight, stuffed me into boxing classes and another fighting sport, so I can defend myself. I guess, I learned a little bit of everything at this point. Even how to cook and clean properly.”, M/n explained, shrugging his shoulders.

To him it was no big deal, it never stressed him out. He could be put under immense pressure and he wouldn’t feel stressed. Ghastly though, was in utter shock and concern.

“Don’t you think, your Family made you do too much ?”, the tailor asked.

“Not really. Why ?”

“Well, most kids, like you, enjoy their free time a lot and don’t cope well under pressure and tasks all day.”

“Ghastly, I grew up way faster than other kids. And while it is true, that I rarely had free time, I was always asked if I was okay with everything they wanted me to do. I could have denied any time, but refused to. It’s not like they forced me. I always want to put myself under immense pressure, learn more and more interesting things and I want to find out where my limit is. Until now, I haven’t found it.”

Ghastly looked at M/n in worry, but didn’t want to poke around any further. He knew Gordon Edgley and he knew that he would never have put a child under immense pressure, if the child wouldn’t have asked for it.

Soon enough they arrived and M/n parked his car next to Skulduggery’s. They got out and M/n raised an eyebrow.

“It is hidden in the Museum ?”

“Yes, it is.”, Ghastly replied.

“How clever.”, M/n said dryly.

The two men chuckled, while the siblings were not that amused. Then Ghastly led them inside, with Skulduggery. They paid for it and then Ghastly led them away to a certain door. It was opened by Skulduggery and Ghastly entered first, then M/n and Stephanie.

Ghastly let a flame appear in his hand and together they all went down the stairs. Stephanie started to shiver, which M/n noticed. He put his left hand on her back and rubbed it. She looked at him and smiled a thankful smile.

Soon they entered a hallway, with heavy doors on both sides and they continued to walk, until they reached a door with a shield and a bear on it. Ghastly stood there and searched around in his pockets, after he found, what he was looking for, he fumbled around on the door. Soon it made a soft click and the door opened.

“Come on in.”, Ghastly said.

The three of them entered and Ghastly entered lastly. Skulduggery clicked his fingers and suddenly candles were burning on the walls in the chamber.

“Does all of this have something to do with the Sceptre ?”, Stephanie asked.

M/n looked around with wide eyes of awe. The chamber was filled with high stapled, heavy, thick books, artifacts, statues, paintings and wood carvings. He even spotted an armor of a knight on one of the walls, it was leaning on it.

“It all has something to do with the Ancients.”, Skulduggery told Stephanie.

Ghastly only nodded.

“That’s why there has to be something about the Sceptre too. That the chamber was so full, I didn’t expect though.”, Skulduggery added.

M/n snorted, while Ghastly gave Skulduggery a triumphant smirk.

“I had a very studious Family.”, Ghastly said jokingly.

“Won’t anyone hear us down here ?”, Stephanie asked worried.

“No one will. These Chambers are sealed. The sound seal is one of them. The other one is a very complex lock.”, Ghastly answered her.

“In other words, you could even scream bloody murder and no one would hear us.”, M/n deadpanned to his Sister.

“Oh, I knew that !”, she yelled at her Brother.

“You didn’t. You were confused as fuck, what a sound seal was. Even I could see it. And it’s fine, not many know what that is, I mean-”, he got interrupted.

“Well, sorry that I am not as fucking smart as you, asshole !”, she yelled slightly angry.

M/n looked taken aback at that. Ghastly and Skulduggery looked at them and Ghastly seemed worried. M/n’s shock and hurt only flashed for a second in his eyes, then he seemed cold and unbothered again, yet all three of them saw the short show of emotion. Stephanie covered her mouth in shock and regret.

“M...M/n, I’m sorry... I didn’t mean it. You know I didn’t, right ?”, she asked softly, reaching out to touch his arm.

He jerked it away and took a few steps away from her. He looked at the floor.

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”, he muttered and pulled his hood up.

He hid his face under it and then turned away from her.

“It’s not ! I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have snapped at you. I know you just want me to understand things properly. You just wanted to help.”

“I said it’s fine ! Leave me alone !”, he said violently.

She shut up and took a step back from him. She hurt him badly with her insult. She never snapped at him before, she knew how sensitive he was to insults from Family. God, Stephanie wished she could wash her mouth out with soap right now.

“Let’s start looking around. The faster we are done, the faster we can get back to my home, figure out if the corpses are there, inspect them and then I can mind my own business.”, M/n said with a very soured mood.

Ghastly was worried for him. That was a low blow from his Sister and it hit him right in the heart.

M/n was silent the whole time, they have been down there. They discussed a painting and solved a little puzzle box, in which M/n was very interested in, but as soon as he saw his Sister looking, he looked away and ignored them. In the Puzzle box was an echo stone. Skulduggery activated it and there appeared an older man, they asked him questions, while he also talked a lot about other things.

He answered them their questions. Who made the Sceptre, who made the Crystal in it, if the Sceptre can be destroyed, if the crystal can be destroyed and where it may be now. As he said that if Gordon was a wise man, he would have brought it back to where he found it, or placed it to someplace similar to it, in Skulduggery’s head went up a light bulb and he knew where it was.

The Echo stone then lost all powers and the man, called Oisin, disappeared again. Ghastly was in shock. So the Sceptre really existed and Gordon really had it last.

They left the Vault and then the Museum. M/n just jumped into his car, turned on the engine and waited for Ghastly to get his ass inside the car. He was not bothering to talk with his Sister.

“I think you hit a very sensitive spot.”, Ghastly muttered to Stephanie.

She lowered her head.

“I know that I did so. He...Corrupted doesn’t care if someone calls him bad names outside of Family and friend circles, but if it was someone from inside that...if it was used as an actual insult, he gets really hurt. I was just...I HATE that he is so smart and I am so stupid. He has to explain the simplest things to me, yet...he never gets irritated to do so. I just...I was angry with myself that I can’t catch up as fast as he can and understand everything as well as he does. I snapped and accidently let it out on him...”, she muttered.

“He will be silent with you for a while, if I remember what Gordon told me about him.”, Skulduggery said softly.

“He will be. I might be ignored for a few days...”, she admitted in guilt.

“We’ll see about that. Maybe I can get him to listen to me and then we will see. He likes talking to me.”, Ghastly said with a small smile.

She looked at the tailor.

“You can try your best...”, she muttered and then got into the Bentley.

“See you at Gordon’s.”, Ghastly told Skulduggery.

The Skeleton nodded and then jumped into his car. Ghastly got into M/n’s Firebird and softly closed the door, then put on the seatbelt.

“Are you okay, Corrupted ?”, Ghastly asked calmly, as M/n started to drive.

“Just dandy.”, he said with a sour mood.

“Be honest with me, please.”

“She didn’t mean to. It happens, I also snap like that sometimes. I just need time to sort my emotions out. I’m fine, Ghastly.”, M/n insisted.

“Are they a rollercoaster right now ?”

“They are. I am sad, hurt, angry, and all I want to do, is hide away, right now. I need a bit time and then I am back to normal, no worries.”

Ghastly looked at him with concern and then looked at the radio.

“May I turn on the radio ?”, he asked.

“You won’t like the music. I have a disc inside with my own music. I don’t like the news, nor the music from there. They interrupt it always way before it is done playing.”, M/n answered.

“I think I won’t hate it.”, Ghastly assured.

“Do what you want, I don’t mind.”, M/n said, shrugging his shoulders.

Ghastly turned on the radio and almost instantly did a song play, Ghastly wasn’t familiar with. M/n knew it though.

“NCS and the song is called Ricochet.”, he said.

“NCS ?”

“No Copyrighted Sounds. They make Music that are not copyrighted, helps YouTube content creators to use it as background music or even memes, without getting in trouble.”, M/n shortly explained.

“Huh. But it ain’t bad. I thought you were into heavy Metal.”

“Hah, those times are over. I was into that as I was nine to eleven years of age.”, M/n said with a small smile. Ghastly smiled. At least M/n wasn’t all too soured anymore.

[orionsangel86]

What do you think sex means for an entity like Morpheus? Even between us humans it means different things for different people

Thats an interesting question. Probably not one anyone but Morpheus himself could answer. As you said it means different things for different people. Sometimes sex is just a primal desire for carnal pleasure, sometimes its about developing a deeper connection, sometimes its about "love making" with someone you are intimately connected to, sometimes its simply an act for reproductive purposes.

From a human perspective it is very difficult to imagine sex and sexual intimacy from the view point of different beings. We are still only in the very early stages of understanding the importance of sex among other animals on Earth outside of just reproduction, and we know that some animals also have sex for pleasure or for intimacy bonding.

Morpheus, like all of the Endless, is a creature that exist so far outside of anything that we can truly understand. They are anthropomorphic personifications of concepts. What is sex to a dream? When a dream is such a loose concept in itself - dreams and wishes, and midnight sleeping hallucinations created by the unconscious mind... that sex is often a part of, sometimes in insanely bizarre and disturbing ways. Dreams and sex kinda go hand in hand, and Morpheus IS Dream, sooooo... sex is probably quite important to him in lots of ways...

Okay maybe I went a bit too deep there for a moment lol. Lets tackle this on a smaller scale. We know from the comics that Morpheus, as a human shaped creature, has sex. We know he has taken many lovers, only some of which we ever actually learn about. We know he has the ability to reproduce, since he has a son. We know he has human genitals (thank you Sandman: Overture for the full frontal nudity) and that as a male shaped being he prefers to take lovers of a female shape (though juries still out on what exactly happened between him and Lucifer with his smooth Ken-doll groin).

We know from Calliope's rather inappropiate speech at the Wake that not only did they have plenty of sex, that he was very very good at it, enough for Calliope to feel completely consumed by their passion. We know he enjoyed sex with Nada so much that he projected their love making to the entire collective unconscious at the time (one hell of a leaked sex tape there!) so not only is he an excellent lover who is very good at sex, he also clearly enjoys it himself if he can lose control that much from it.

I am hesitant to say that he only has sex with people he loves, though it does seem rather consistent, other than perhaps the situation with Titania which we never learn anything more about - the Audible audiobook briefly elaborates and has Morpheus and Titania very briefly mention that they slept together and it appears to be something they both think of fondly but certainly aren't in love so I wonder if Titania was just a casual fling? Otherwise I doubt they'd still be on good terms! (It's funny how fandom jokes that he commissioned a Midsummer Nights Dream as a way to insult Titania but in the actual comic this totally is not the case, he commissioned it to honour her and her people. Whatever happened between Titania and Morpheus, it did not end on bad terms.) So because of that, I can't really say that he only ever has sex with people he is deeply in love with.

Honestly I reckon that since he was created by a cishet allosexual man he was written with the sexual appetite of a cishet allosexual man. He probably isn't demi or ace and he probably isn't meant to be queer (though arguably a creature such as he could never be shoved into such a limited box as "heterosexual").

Note: I don't even want to attempt to get into the various "aspects" of Dream where there is a version of Dream for every living thing that dreams in the universe and therefore have to contemplate whether Dream has also had love affairs with creatures of all different types outside of regular human shaped female creatures though I am very curious to see if the King of Cats ever took a female cat lover (i mean honestly if regular Dream was totally cool flirting with Lady Bast...) in which case we can also argue that fem!Dream takes lovers, weird robot alien Dream takes lovers, Martian flaming head Dream takes lovers and so on and so forth.

There is also the interesting dynamic between Dream and his sibling Desire, because sex is what Desire is all about, and sex technically falls under their remit - hence the many many falling outs and tensions between them where Desire appears to be the principle instigator of Dreams romantic woes. I think that for this reason, Dream probably represses his desires for sex (and love) as much as possible, and if he were on better terms with his sibling, would probably seek out sex and romance more often than he does - Thessaly being an outlier because I fully believe he pursued her as an attempt at self sabotage as an awful rebound affair following the situation where he had to face his romantic failings with Nada, Calliope, and Alianora in short succession.

In some attempt at a conclusion: what does sex mean for Morpheus? Well, its something he likes, is good at, and if given the choice would probably like to have more of it, preferably with someone he is in love with who loves him in return, given his romantic inclinations. At the same time, bearing in mind who and what he is, there is probably nothing that even the absolutely filthiest of kinksters could come up with that would surprise him, nothing that he hasn't seen or used in some way to create the most bizarre sex dreams possible, and nothing that would shock or disturb him (it's not like he ever blinked an eye even on his trips to Hell). Though whether or not that means he is into kinky shit well, the only indication of his preferences we can conclude is that he likes strong confident women who can talk back to him, and impress him and treat him as equals rather than the powerful creature he is. So maybe he's secretly a sub? :P

[nerves-nebula]

ok i finished Lolita, here's my rambling notes which are really more about me & my reactions than the book. I stopped taking as many notes the further in I went.

the forward for this is so funny. we got someone in universe telling us that the things this guy says are absurd and you should NOT fall for his bullshit, because he is NOT a gentleman.

Approx 24 minutes in he proposes the idea of the nymphette. 9-14

its fascinating the way he constructs this other sect of being, this third sex, this nymphet. the way he calls them demons, as if it's their fault, as if it could never be a problem with him.

gets mad that some guys entire fuckin house burns down so he cant ogle his daughters. what an asshole.

Negro/Negress Count (i updated this every time the word negro is used. i just think its funny, its like a drinking game for me. at least black people exist in this world lmao): 7

(about quote #6) the way he talks about Mrs Haze (and in fact most women and girls) as though he is so handsome that he literally cannot stop them from entangling him in an affair is fascinating. Man cannot hold himself responsible for anything.

ok so he's just met dolores and this isnt really a product of the book, but the narrator does a REALLY god job with HH. genuinely just a really good performance. he reads the cadence of HH's flowery writing so well, he emotes so well. its great.

of course this overwritten little creep would write down all his thoughts in a little book. just like he's doing now. at least he's consistent?

so much damn interpretation huh. he's always like "I know she wanted me to kiss her i could tell she was waiting for it" MY GUY.

wait when does this take place was it really normal to marry your first cousin in the midwest in the 1950s?

the way he describes her being not entirely innocent as a warning sign, as some great evil that would trap him, is fascinating. because she is not what he thought an innocent little girl should be, he pushes a bit of the responsibility off of himself and onto her. she's not a child, she's a dangerous nymphet who pulls him in and traps him in her impropriety. despite him literally (thinking he was) drugging her (in an attempt to keep her from knowing what hes doing) he STILL blames her for enticing him. still considers her a fae creature. i hate him. i love this book.

it is truly kind of fascinating how he makes it sound like their trip wasn't all that bad and just offhandedly mentions horrific stuff like the rate at which she sexually abused her, or how Dolores cried herself to sleep every night when she thought he was asleep, and how she almost never seemed to actually be happy. and yet he'll go on and on about all the things they got to see, and how much money this whole kidnapping roadtrip cost him.

the fact that he now has to just straight up pay her, and she's clearly not enjoying anything is so !!! and then he has the NERVE to steal her money back while she's away !! the money she's probably trying to save up to get away from him !! do you guys know what thats like?? when the money youve carefully saved just.. disappears?? good god.

oh ok so he KNOWS she might try to run away if she has too much money. cool cool normal.

i do like this school parent teacher meeting thing thats basically laying out that it's very clear dolores has issues around sex. like this is somehow so clearly an issue that they called him in about it. Ough.

love his indigence at Lo saying that he tried to molest her back before he married her mother (more or less true, and i would even say he succeeded that one time) and that he murdered her mother (a reasonable assumption on her part)

Mans just said he can shed torrents of tears thru his dick. He’s unnecessarily crude for someone so poetic and I love that part of his character tbh.

So he just slapped her and it’s fascinating how clearly abusive he is even from his own softened retelling. Like he doesn’t phrase it like this, but every action he takes is to isolate and control her.

i know he sucks shit but him leaving Rita is especially cruel to me. there was no need to leave her behind with only a note. no amount of calling a woman "sweet" or his "poor little thing" makes up for how absolutely disposable they all are to him. he admits that he needed her, that her company kept him from having breakdowns that would send him to a hospital, and he still just leaves her behind forever. when he knows thats what she was scared of most.

i aint even know about Clare Quilty. huh!

i am enjoying his sad walk through his "smothered memories" like yeah man. you suck and you fucked up everything and you do deserve to feel bad about your active ignorance (i like that he brought up the memory of rescinding that one promise because that was one instance i was really stuck on. like she has nothing man, and it's silly to you but it's everything to her)

y'know im still not entirely sure what Pentapod Monster means

Quotes:

he is not a gentleman

But how his heart beat when, among the innocent throng,he espied a demon child, "enfant charmante et fourbe," dim eyes, bright lips, ten years in jail if you only show her you are looking at her.

I was naive as only a pervert can be (lol)

nymphets do not occur in polar regions (oh my god shut upp)

the reader will regret to learn that soon after my return to civilization I had another bout with insanity (I absolutely do not regret it my wonderful narrator <3)

I was perfectly aware that if by any wild chance I became her lodger, she would methodically proceed to do in regard to me what taking a lodger probably meant to her all along, and I would again be enmeshed in one of those tedious affairs I knew so well.

To keep her happy, I had to present her with an illustrated catalogue of them, all nicely differentiated, according to the rules of those American ads where schoolchildren are pictured in a subtle ratio of races, with one--only one, but as cute as they make them--chocolate-colored round-eyed little lad, almost in the very middle of the front row.(I just find this quote interesting because it makes a point that there would only ever be at most one black kid. not sure what to make of it but i did enjoy that)

It was she who seduced me. (SHUT UP)

the body of some immortal demon disguised as a female child. (SHUT UPPPPP!!)

Used French only when she was a very good little girl. (I’m attacking you with my teeth and claws. I love this book.)

[wowbright]

Fic: Home for Christmas

Fandom/pairing: Glee, Kurt/Blaine

Event: December Klaine Fanworks Challenge 2023

Prompt: I'll Be Home For Christmas

Words: ~650 words                                  

Rating: Teen and up

Summary: On Blaine’s second Christmas as a missionary, he calls the Anderson clan. But first, he calls Kurt.

Notes: This is part of my Mormon!Klaine universe. It takes place after Out of Eden, which I am still in the process of posting to AO3. It’s among the likely possibilities for their future.

* * *

Christmas was as perfect as it could get on a mission. Blaine spent the day at the refugee center, playing with kids and chatting with the adults who didn't know German, but knew English. He and his companion came here at least twice a week now; President Steele had increased their service hours to ten a week so they could help out with the church’s refugee efforts. And because it was Christmas, they were allowed to spend even more time volunteering.

This was the kind of missionary work Blaine loved—sharing Christ's love not by preaching, but by helping to put smiles on the faces of people who had every reason to frown.

Unfortunately, they couldn't spend forever there. In the evening, they returned to their apartment to make their twice-a-year phone calls home. Blaine’s companion went into the bedroom for his call, shutting the door behind him. Blaine stayed in the kitchen and removed his contraband phone from its hiding place in his bag. He would call Arizona in a few minutes, but first he had someone else to talk to.

“Blaine! I'm so glad you got a chance to call! Merry Christmas!” Kurt’s voice was effervescent. It made Blaine feel light and bubbly inside. He was so grateful to Elder Nixon for convincing him to buy this phone.

“Me too. My companion is in the bedroom now calling his folks, and the door is closed. I love Christmas!” Blaine was already smiling so hard, he could feel a pleasant ache in his cheeks.

"Have you already called your folks?”

“No, he thinks that's what I'm doing now. And I will call them, but I had to hear your voice first. So tell me all about your Christmas!”

“Well—” Kurt launched into a warm and funny story about a candy cane incident involving his dad and aunt. “And yesterday’s caroling at the senior center with the old members of the glee club was fun. Most of our audience really seemed to enjoy it, but my favorite was the old lady who hated us. They had a big table of craft supplies for making decorations, and she kept taking the pipe cleaners and folding them up in suggestive designs and then throwing them at us. And she had the most creative insults! Really spunky! I can only aspire to be so charismatic in my old age.”

Blaine chuckled. Kurt was one of a kind.

“Now, tell me about your day,” Kurt said. “What did you do? I hope you didn't have to sit through an uncomfortable Christmas dinner with a family you hardly know. I hated those. I always felt like I was imposing.”

"It was great!” Blaine told Kurt all about it. They texted regularly, so Kurt was familiar with many of the names and personalities. But talking was special. Blaine didn't get many chances where he was alone enough that he could carry on a conversation out loud on his verboten phone.

“I'm so glad you're getting to volunteer more,” Kurt said. “You sound really happy.”

“I am, when I'm working with them. Some of the other stuff is still hard, but whenever I can help people, everything gets better,” Blaine said. “I still miss you, though. A lot.”

“I know. I miss you, too. I don't say it much, because I don't want to do anything that would pull you back home before you’re ready. But I’ll be really, really happy to see you and hold you and kiss you and … Well, my dad’s in the next room. I can't get too graphic. But I'm looking forward to all that when you get back, Blaine.”

Blaine felt himself blushing—out of delight more than modesty. “Me, too. And I can't wait to be home with you next Christmas.”

“Oh?” Kurt’s tone was flirtatious. “Whose home? Yours or mine?”

“It doesn't matter. Anywhere you are is home to me, Kurt.”

[thebunniesgrim]

helluva boss’ humor really trips me up sometimes  

(long post like really long post i go off)

Because sometimes it plays with hell's society and makes funny jokes like the HR joke in Spring Broken. One thing that sticks out like a sore thumb is when it makes jokes or points fun at prudes in the universe. Which btw I don’t think this bad or anything it’s just something that pulled me personally out of the show. It’s still funny at the end of the day but!  

Like the normalcy of death, swearing, sex, innuendos and all that. like jokes that would make you or me pause for a second wouldn’t be such a deal to them and vice versa is funny. Honestly the M&M’s being in a loving relationship in hell as a joke is funny  

But the thing that trips me up is the way some demons in universe react to the jokes doesn’t make any since. I understand their reaction is a joke, but why did they have that reaction anyway? for example  

In the LooLoo Land episode a good joke was when Octavia said she was going to be sick then Moxxie panics going through different medications and pulls out a bunch of syringes full of morphine just to casually throw them into a baby stroller when Octavia says she wasn’t really sick. Hilarious and it shows the human and demon side of moxxie love it. Although in the same episode Blizto says he isn't a day hooker and the lady walking by judges him and he calls her a prude. Funny yes! But why does she care like girl he has a whole gun and that’s what you choose to be concerned about? Ok. I understand her being shocked is the joke but why is she? In a place where being a hooker is possibly the most normal thing to them as being lawyer is to you or me. Why such a strong reaction?  

(Stolas has green screen arms lol)

Even the newest Mammon ep in Fizz’s “two weeks' notice or whatever it's called” song when he say “spending life bent over with your fist in my ‘A’” and the crowed is like shocked or put off by it like sure maybe they just weren't expecting it but he literally says bent over and even shakes his little imp ass at them while setting up the joke. It could have also been that they were surprised he censored himself. I don’t know, do you know?  

Also, I must say hell born demons don’t have to be always ok with sex jokes. A little verity never hurts anybody. just Like Moxxie not very violent or having his limits is fine and also Striker being uncomfortable or not liking that everyone makes sex jokes at his expense is kind of funny it's of the same caliber of funny that the M&M’s gimmick has. I also think he doesn’t like the sex jokes because he doesn’t have control of the situation (or Stolas, Moxxie, and Fizz just aren't his type who knows lol) he was more than ready to diddle Biltzo’s holes if it meant he’d join Striker. Also, he didn’t seem to mind the other imps fawning over him even if he did kick that one girl in the face. Kind of like a you can look but don’t touch kind of thing. He likes or deals with the jokes until he can't control the situation and it's like come one dude, I'm trying to kill you cower before me plz :( you feel me? Like that makes since because it can be explained away with, their character but seeing as it’s not a social norm so when others who we don’t know and are supposed to show the status quo do it, it’s a little bit weird you know?  

This also applies to Helluva Boss in general not just jokes. It’s honestly hard to tell what's allowed in hell and what isn't sometimes even for jokes because you know how a lot of people were weirded out at the kid being at the clown pageant and everyone is like “dude its hell they don’t have the same type of morals as we do” but also have people in the show react to sex or taboo stuff like it's weird you know? Like yes, I expect hypocrisy in the world of hell like a whole “rules for thee but for me” kind of thing. It is hard to stay true to that when the rules aren’t enforced?  because one second, you’ll have Loona and Blizto making fun of Moxxie for being “fat”, but you also want me to care when Mammon calls Fizz fat. I'm supposed to take Loona beating up Blizto as a joke but once Stella raises a hand to Stolas, I'm supposed to be like oh no abuse! 

Speaking of abuse. Mammon is just Blitzo cranked up to eleven. They are practically the same character given what the show tells us. What Blitzo does to Moxxie is the same thing Mammon does to fizz only cranked up to nine. Mammon says things that make Fizz worry I.e. “ready to reclaim your win another year... I saw your competition and it's pretty stiff, right? You are going to have try extra hard” remember in “The Harvest Moon Festival” ep where Blizto says “now just remember your rep with the in laws is on the line here so, no pressure at all you totally will not make an ass of yourself in front of everyone important in your life” he totally did that on purpose. How about when Mammon calls Fizz a “a bit chungo”? blitzo in seeing stars “you know it wouldn’t kill ya to put a salad in your body every now and then” and he says it meaner. He even encourages Loona to also call moxxie fat so while it’s still Loona doing it Blizto not telling her to chill out or something and there by condoning it, but he has the nerve to clutch his stupid little pearls (also blitzo isn't Wareing his mom little necklace thing in ep) when Mammon does the same thing.

The fuck is that face for you slimy little bitch?  

Mammon says sexually charged stuff to Fizz that is very obviously making him uncomfortable but disregards it like its nothing? “The more they’ll want a piece of you they can home and fuck! Don’t you want that Fizzy? to be fucked?” Then Fizz said no, and he disregarded it. Blizto in Murder Family, Harvest Moon, Truth seekers, Ex's and Ohs when he makes a big deal about someone having sex with both Moxxie and Millie and then making a big deal at the fact that he, Moxxie and Millie have had sex with the same person also maybe Ozzie's when he says he watches the M&M get it on but it's hard to gaze if Moxxie’s reaction was surprise, disgust or both. Mammon calls Fizz a “a stupid little [HONK]” Blizto calls Moxxie “a fucking disgrace” in Unhappy Campers but to be fair I make it an active effort to forget that ep is canon so. Mammon puts Fizz in a situation he can't handle, which leads to a panic attack. Blizo in the first ep Murder Family where Moxxie doesn’t want to kill Martha because he doesn’t want to kill a mother and ruin a family and is openly hesitant and uncomfortable about it causing him to have a small panic and mess up the mission at first. Mammon tells fizz to get his shit together with the underlying threat of firing, terminating, or worse. Murder family Blitzo says “But if you ever pull a stunt like this again, I will fuck you and your wife”. Both BLizto and Mammon treat Fizz and Moxxie all buddy buddy when they do stuff, they want but when they don’t comply or might not do something they don’t like they get mean or aggressive. They only main differences is that Moxxie can talk back to Blizto in a way and fizz can't. Also, Fizz actually quits, and escapes his horrible boss.  

I know that the pilot isn't cannon but it’s the blueprint of the characters and Blizto being abusive to moxxie sexually and verbally being a constant throughout the pilot and the canonized show is just... icky 

The show will tell me that imps and hellhounds are at the bottom of society but also have them stand up to the deadly sins like it no big deal. Loona tried to fight Beelzebub, Crimson tried to bribe and blackmail Asmodeus, Fizz stands up Mammon (as he should but Mammon could have literally tuned him into a smoothie) like the deadly sins are the next things to gods and these low-level nobodies are trying to square up. Not only does it make the deadly sins look like total wusses, but it also makes hellhounds and imps look more powerful than they are. Striker saying royals' step all over imps and treat them horribly and other than stella literally throwing Pringles and referring to him as “this one”

but Stolas literally uses Pringles as like a phone stand in Seeing Stars so.... 

The only ones who we’ve seem treat the imps like that on a regular basis are other non-royal hell born demons like the twins in Mammons ep. The lady and her kid in the doctor's office in western energy, the hellhound bodyguards in The Circus and even other imps like how Millies family treat Moxxie because he’s traditionally strong, or how striker thinks that he and blizto are far better then they’re own kind. Sure, the imps are butlers, purse accessories, and work on farms to feed the other rings. Other than the farm thing other demons do too from what we’ve seen. Also, from what we have seen, the royals are so detached from imps it seems like Strikers’ biggest problem is other demons themselves. The only royal we see talk down to imps is Stolas. Stella, Andrealphus, Paimon, never says much about them or even addresses them in any kind of way that’s outright negative, it’s more or less just plain indifference. I mean even the 7 deadly sins (that we’ve met so far) don’t say anything about imps in a derogatory way mammon doesn’t, Bee calls Blitzo “Imp boy” but not in a mean way, and Asmodeus call Moxxie “little imp” which seems more teasing than mean.  

Ok look if I'm to take the hell hierarchy seriously then please play by your rules. I-ok so like are the sins a force to be reckoned with or not? Because they just seem like regular demons but bigger. You're telling me the second blizto get nabbed by the DORK agents Stolas is out here cracking necks and summoning himself in blood to save him 

But nothing was done to save fizz?  

“It was hostage situation” ok and? Asmodeus is a sin he could have pulled a Stolas and posseted one of Crimsons goons and shot or incomposite striker and crimson. You have almost infante power and you can't save your boyfriend and work colleague? And if demons can't be possessed then send Stolas in exchange for the crystal. Crimson doesn’t know about Stolas, and it would surprise him stolas can turn into his big bird form in hell and did in Seeing Stars. ALSO why is everyone just standing up to and trying to pick fights with the Sins? Like guys I get it I really do but please realistically you're going to get smooshed like bug 

I'm constantly being told that Stolas and Blitzo can't be together while Beelzebub and Asmodeus can be with Vortex and Fizz. With no real in show reason as to why? You can address its hypocrisy all you want but you still never gave a reason as to why one is ok and other isn't. Stolas is Royality and can't date outside his rank? And the 7 deadly sins are of a different rank than him so it's different. How so? Why does Asmodeus need it to keep him and fizz a secret? if a god was dating a regular person, what could you possibly do about it? Also, if Asmodeus needs to keep his relationship a secret, then why doesn’t Beelzebub? If it because Beelzebub’s relationship corresponds to her sin how so? How is dating someone not of your rank gluttonous or indulgent? Unless Bee is a serial dater, and I don’t think she is how so? Also, Asmodeus dating Fizz does correspond to his sin he’s the over seer of lust and lust doesn’t stop at rank or class. If them being romantic is the problem, then they could lie and tell everyone that him and fizz are just fuck buddies or they're in an open relationship where they are ok with each other sleeping around but they don’t do it. They’re already business partners; it wouldn’t be a stretch if the literal ruler of lust would want to sleep with someone regardless of their rank and whether or not they work for them. Plus, they do openly say they are fucking each other while Ozzie's workers are near so them having sex isn't the problem.  

Ok so like ya’ll know the live action Grinch movie? And you know that one part where the grinch is the holiday chair mister and the who's are giving him a bunch of food even after he's full and his face is full of food, but they keep shoving more in his mouth? Yeah, that is what watching helluva boss is like sometimes you know?   

It's like a barrage of information or nothing 

Anyways  

this show is ride and then some lol granted this doesn’t really make or break the show for me honestly, it's just that the more the show tells me one thing it’ll go through hell (heh) to make it, so it doesn’t matter anymore, and it only brings up more questions. Like if something isn't allowed then make it so don’t just tell me oh that’s not allowed but is but it’s a problem but I'm not going to tell you why or what the problem is just trust me look at the cute couples don’t look anywhere else don’t worry about it  

I know you’re probably asking yo why are you questioning it I'm just a confused fan and I want the show I like to make since is that such a tall order? 

[mrs-luigi-vargas]

Lowish-effort Aro Mario and Aro Bowser icons for @arospecfanworksweek! They're very simple but I like making them I should do it more often :D

Anyway there's whole lot of rambling about the headcanons under the cut if you're curious, haha. I guess it makes this entry technically match Day 1's prompt but honestly I wasn't intentionally trying to follow said prompts at all, lmao

~~~

OK, so I've headcanoned Mario as aro for a while, now. Part of it is me projecting, of course. But also I think it would be interesting if he was, mainly because of how it would affect his dynamic with Peach. Because, you know, the hero and the princess; the knight and the damsel; he was a boy, she was a girl - at least a lot of the Toads seem to think that it couldn’t be any more obvious. But Mario wouldn’t think it was obvious. And any suggestions otherwise would just be mostly awkward and off-putting for reasons that are difficult to get across to the romance-minded. He and Peach were already close, as friends. That's all they needed to be, right?

But anyway what I'm trying to say is a major appeal of this headcanon for me is the like…inherent defiantness of it. Standing in step with so many normally romance-coded things and doing them platonically despite what everyone wants or expects. And then also me projecting, like I said before 😊. Wrote a couple of fics about it even, if you wanna read them~ 😁

As for aro!Bowser, though, it's only something I've vaguely been thinking about recently. 'Cause I read a whole bunch of Bowuigi fic last year, and in almost all of those they gotta wave away/retcon/reconcile Bowser's attraction to/kidnapping of Peach, right? So one way I've seen of doing that is something to the effect of Bowser kidnapping Peach because Junior needs a mom. Which is such an interesting rationale to give him, haha. But to be fair its usually not by itself; there's usually a sense of 'well, Peach is very kind and beautiful, so marriage is definitely the way to go on this (or so I thought'. But sometimes it isn't and that's very funny to me. The things shippers do to pull their stories off are something to behold sometimes 🤭

But still! It got me thinking. What if Bowser's crush on Peach was completely manufactured? Unknowingly, of course; in the sense that Peach is very kind and beautiful and powerful and the monarch of a nearby kingdom in his age range so that's how these thinks are supposed to go, yeah? He wasn’t totally sure; becoming King didn’t really leave any room to know otherwise, with how much work there was to be done every day. At least Kamek had seemed to think so, though, talking about alliances and heirs and a bunch of other things Bowser hadn't been really listening to. Though Kamek was hardly wrong about anything important, would it kill him to be a lot less boring about it?

But even still, Bowser's proud and headstrong and stubborn, so when the marriage-alliance with Peach doesn’t work out then he decides to make it work out. And then the kidnappings start. And then continue. Because "it'll totally work this time, this plan is perfect!".

Like trying to jam a square peg into a round box over and over with no clue that there's anything wrong. Or maybe an inkling of a clue that we've decided to ignore because, you know, "I'll kidnap Peach for good, this time, you'll see!"

Also I remember seeing discussion somewhere about how Bowser could be interpreted as someone with abandonment issues, which could play into this too; people will stay if you keep them by force, after all, whether by kidnapping, marriage, or both.

So yeah. Not the greatest outlook on things, obviously.

Regardless, I think that in this universe where Mario and Bowser are both aromantic they both get on track to consciously realizing it post-Super Mario Odyssey.

Mario because as he and Peach are flying home Peach obviously wants to know why he snap-proposed to her like that. To which Mario has to sheepishly explain how his inner competitiveness had flared up when Bowser had tried to propose to her again. To which Peach sighs because yeah, of course it was that. And then Mario gets around to asking if Peach is okay, to which Peach describes the nightmare of a past while she'd had because of this wedding business, to which the conversation pivots to weddings in general, and then romance in general.

And Mario contributes to the conversation as best he can, but… he knows from watching Luigi's romance-related ups and downs over the years that the way he himself thought about the concept wasn’t…correct.

But Peach won't stand for Mario thinking that there was something wrong with him; it takes an overnight stint or three in the castle library (to Toadsworth's chagrin) before she finally finds an answer for him. So she invites him to the castle for tea, and for a vocabulary lesson that'll change his life.

Meanwhile Bowser sits on the moon,. Reflecting on his utter defeat that must have been more crushing than he'd thought for him to not even remember how he got out of that cave, thinking about how even aside from Mario being on his tail the entire time this whole wedding planning business was more of a stress-filled ordeal than he'd initially thought it would be, considering the fact that the post-wedding future that he'd figured he'd figure out as it came had stubbornly remained an amorphous blob of ambiguity instead of snapping into place during those final hours, despite the Broodals' assurances to the contrary. He'd indulge in a rare bout of self-reflection, maybe, about these inconsistencies.

And then he would shrug, get up, and make his way home. Because while he wasn’t particularly sure about marrying Peach anymore, he knew he would still be kidnapping her. Because of the engaging process of making and executing perfectly laid plans, because of the adrenaline rush of a good fight, because of the future bonding experiences with his kids, because the rest of his minions needed something to do, ha.

Because of the fact that he was Bowser, King of the Koopas, and he's absolutely not the sort of person to just give up, even if his core motivations have shifted slightly! And just as Mario would always show up to ruin his plans and take Peach back home Bowser would just make new plans, and he was going to successfully pull a kidnapping off and beat Mario once and for all, he just knew it!

[hold-me-witcher]

Daydrinking to Drown Out the Pain

Read on ao3!

Special thank you to @elder-flower for beta-ing <3

The lad in the loud Hawaiian shirt tapped his chin thoughtfully while looking at the drinks menu behind the bar. Then his big blue gaze switched so that it was directed at Geralt, who took that as his cue to ask, “What can I get you?” like any good bartender would. 

Despite all the time he’d spent pondering the menu, the boy did not order. Instead he let out a long sigh. “My ex got engaged today,” he said. “To my other ex. Give me something that’ll fuck me up.” 

Geralt did a double take. The customer didn’t even look old enough to be drinking, much less to have more than one ex who he’d been broken up with long enough that they’d moved on so thoroughly. 

“High school sweethearts?” he asked doubtfully, his hands automatically pulling a glass from behind the counter.

The man chuckled. “Oh no, university actually. Here, let me help you out.” He presented his ID with a flourish under Geralt’s raised eyebrows. “I know,” his tone was self-deprecating, “babyface.” 

“Hm.” Geralt looked the ID over. It certainly seemed legit, facing horizontally and everything. Apparently the man’s name was Julian and he was twenty-three. He handed the ID back to its owner and very carefully did not react when their fingers brushed. “How's a Long Island iced tea?”

Normally Geralt wouldn’t give two shits past getting a customer their drink but well, Julian was dressed nicely enough that he would probably give a healthy tip to a listening ear. He reeked of that very special “willing to toss money at whatever makes me feel better” air. And it was late afternoon, before the evening rush so it’s not like he had much else to do. At least that’s what Geralt told himself, when he sidled down the bar to give the man his drink and then stayed. He had no idea how to start the conversation but luckily Julian needed no prodding.

“It’s just like, I don’t even care that much!” he burst out, before taking a dejected sip of his drink.

“But you’re drinking about it,” Geralt pointed out. Shit, maybe that wasn’t sympathetic enough. 

Luckily Julian didn’t seem to mind his bluntness. He gave a bitter smile. “Yes well, it makes for a compelling narrative, don’t you think?” He took another long sip, the drink already half gone. “It’s not about the people- I mean, it’s a little about the people. Valdo and Virginia are both awful and they deserve each other. I hope they’ll be absolutely miserable together.”

Geralt wasn’t quite sure what to respond. He settled on, “Sounds like you need to stop getting involved with people whose names start with V.” 

Julian gave a surprised laugh like he’d actually found that funny. “I do, don’t I? Anyways yeah, it’s not like I’m jealous or hung up on either of them, it’s just- just-”

“They have someone and you don’t?” Geralt guessed. 

“Yes!” Julian exclaimed. Angry sip. “I cannot fucking believe two such miserable bats have gone and decided to get hitched when neither of them could bear to commit to me after a year long relationship each. I mean I dodged a bullet there obviously. Me, married at twenty three? What a laugh. But still, they’re together and they had the gall to invite me to their engagement party and I’m here . . .”

“Drinking alone in a bar,” Geralt finished. 

“Precisely.” Julian drained the rest of his drink. “I’m sorry, you must think me quite pathetic. I swear I usually drink with friends, it's just that they’re all at an engagement party this evening.”

Geralt frowned. “Doesn’t seem like they’re very good friends.”

Julian gave a choked laugh. “Oh no it’s me, I’m the problem. I act absolutely cordial with Valdo and Virginia so no one suspects a thing. Didn’t want to wreck the group. They’re not bad people, just very bad partners, you know? My friends wouldn’t let me daydrink alone if they knew, but I took the coward's way out, claimed I had prior plans.”

Geralt knew a thing or two about fudging the truth to get out of unwanted interactions. He’d done it countless times to get out of Yen’s fancy dinner parties. 

“You still deserve support,” Geralt said, as gently as he could. 

“Of course I do!” Julian exclaimed. “And luckily I have you- oh shit I’m so sorry I’ve been prattling on and on and I haven’t even asked your name, so rude of me, sorry-”

“Geralt,” Geralt interrupted. “My name’s Geralt.”

“Yes good, Geralt, the world's kindest hottest bartender.” Julian swayed on the barstool. “Oh bollocks, I drank that rather quickly didn’t I? I’m afraid it’s all hitting at once.” 

Geralt grunted, hoping his blush wasn’t too noticeable as he poured Julian a glass of ice water. “Here, should help.”

Endearingly, Julian pressed the cool mason jar to his forehead before taking a drink. “Geralt,” he said thoughtfully, tracing his fingers through the condensation along the sides of the glass, “doesn’t start with a V.” 

Geralt wished he knew how to respond. Instead he found himself considering Julian’s flushed cheeks and slightly glazed eyes. It was a pretty face really, with some stubble would probably even be considered handsome. Pretty-handsome people with bright eyes were just Geralt’s type, godsdamnit. 

“Say,” a sly smile quirked Julian’s lips, “You wouldn’t happen to be single and into men, would you?”

Well that was much more forward than Geralt was used to. His lips parted. Nothing came out. He tried again. “Um. I.”

Julian groaned before Geralt could actually say anything of substance. “Gods! I am so sorry that was insanely inappropriate, please forget I said anything. I swear I don’t usually harass people in their workplaces. Or at all!”

“It’s fine,” Geralt finally managed. “I. Hm. My brothers will be here to take over my shift in an hour. You can stay here, sober up ‘til I’m finished. Can’t take you home if you’re intoxicated. If you’re still interested by then,” he added. “Or if you just wanted to talk more, we can . . . talk.” 

The way Julian was beaming at him made Geralt want to hide, but also stare until his eyes dried out. “Only if you’re sure.” 

Geralt shrugged. “Would’ve told you to fuck off if I wanted to.” 

Julian’s smile grew wider. “Of that I have no doubt! Anyways, let me close out my tab. Water only while I wait! I can still sit up here and complain to you in between customers though, right? Because darling I have so much to say.” 

Julian did in fact tip very well, but even if he hadn’t Geralt would have been utterly content to listen to him prattle on about idiots getting married young these days and why did people even still do marriage? Honestly no one had the right to sound so good while endlessly complaining. 

By the time Eskel and Lambert came in for the always busy evening shift, Geralt was entirely familiar with the cadence of Julian’s voice. It wasn’t grating like most over-talkative people, in fact it was rather soothing. As he approached Julian around the other side of the bar, finally ready to leave, it was gratifying to see him slide off his barstool with an eager smile. Geralt found himself quite looking forward to hearing what kinds of things Julian had to say to him once they were alone.