#that was for a psychology & religion class

[nando161mando]

[menlove]

One time I intentionally got a whole page of the exam wrong in "Healthcare Professions." The class was supposed to teach us about career paths, and instead it was two weeks of solid fatphobia, with very little emphasis on healthcare jobs. Anyway, they wanted me to describe "empty calories" and apparently, "a calorie is a unit of measurement and therefore, you cannot have an empty calorie any more than an empty inch."

They also forced us to watch "Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead." I left them a scathing review after the class.

SCREAM that's such a good answer though like. fuck them. I would've left them a bad review too that's so awful. and man I HATE fat sick and nearly dead. my mom used to watch it all the time and it's just so.... like the fact that they had you watch that in a healthcare professions class is insane

[vorareromantic]

i can't believe i almost minored in religious studies when i get legitimately nauseous if someone talks about god for longer than 5 minutes

[quotesfrommyreading]

The rich have always worked less than the poor, because they could afford to. The landed gentry of preindustrial Europe dined, danced, and gossiped, while serfs toiled without end. In the early 20th century, rich Americans used their ample downtime to buy weekly movie tickets and dabble in sports. Today’s rich American men can afford vastly more downtime. But they have used their wealth to buy the strangest of prizes: more work!

Perhaps long hours are part of an arms race for status and income among the moneyed elite. Or maybe the logic here isn’t economic at all. It’s emotional—even spiritual. The best-educated and highest-earning Americans, who can have whatever they want, have chosen the office for the same reason that devout Christians attend church on Sundays: It’s where they feel most themselves. “For many of today’s rich there is no such thing as ‘leisure’; in the classic sense—work is their play,” the economist Robert Frank wrote in The Wall Street Journal. “Building wealth to them is a creative process, and the closest thing they have to fun.”

  —  The Religion of Workism Is Making Americans Miserable

[crystallilytarot]

Your future partner's hobbies. Choose a cookie cutter!

Since it's a general reading, probably won't gonna resonate all of them.

Pile 1 - butterfly

Sorry but sex hehe, probably very sexual. Good clothes, shoes, fashion. Furniture or electronic devices or unique home decor stuff, but all of them are good quality, probably expensive. Probably likes to read about human nature, psychology. Philosophy. Spirituality or religion. Like to understand themself too, did inner work. Like to help others, their love language can be gift giving, like to surprise their loved ones. If you will have children or pets, they will be so silly with them, like to be playful. Laughing together with you. Some sport too, but probably not in a gym, like to try some unique stuff, fencing, horse riding, rock climbing.

Pile 2 - bunny

Traveling, even just learning about new cultures. Can be a local picnic too, hiking, being in nature. Like arts, painting, music. Creative, probably they make art or playing in an instrument too. Probably into some ancient culture, maybe Egypt, Greece, Rome. Like to participate in contest, very competitive. Like to argue, not because they want to fight, but like to exchange opinions, can have a job related to this too. Like to be in the spotlight, talking with people, talking in front of people. Being with friends, family, a little social butterfly. Sometimes need a little alone time, maybe a selfcare weekend, a spa, massage. Like to take a nap, staying in bed for long in the weekends.

Pile 3 - bear

Feels a succesful person and like to enjoy their money, especially going on nice trips. First class, good hotels, nice view. In sports, they choose something where they need to be persistent. If they go to the gym, they like to sweat. They like to work hard and see the progress. Chess or something where they need to use their brain. They like nice cars, racing or some other vehicles, motorbikes maybe, ships or yachts. Like to read about psychology, science, they need data. A leader type very much, and enjoy it. Probably like their culture's traditions, or their family's traditions and want to share with their partner and future children too. Massage, giving and receiving too. Actually a charming, nice person, like a wise teddy bear.

[talonabraxas]

The Archetypes and the Collective Unconscious (1968) Carl Jung

Why did primitive man go to such lengths to describe and interpret the happenings in the natural world, for example the rising and setting of the sun, the phases of the moon, the seasons? Carl Jung believed that the events of nature were not simply put into fairytales and myths as a way of explaining them physically. Rather, the outer world was used to make sense of the inner.

In our time, Jung noted, this rich well of symbols – art, religion, mythology – which for thousands of years helped people understand the mysteries of life, had been filled in and replaced by the science of psychology. What psychology lacked, ironically given its borrowing of the ancient Greek term, was an understanding of the psyche, or the self in its broadest terms.

For Jung, the goal of life was to see the 'individuation' of this self, a sort of uniting of a person's conscious and unconscious minds so that their original unique promise might be fulfilled. This larger conception of the self was also based on the idea that humans are expressions of a deeper layer of universal consciousness. To grasp the uniqueness of each person, paradoxically we had to go beyond the personal self to understand the workings of this deeper collective wisdom.

The collective unconscious

Jung admitted that the idea of the collective unconscious “belongs to the class of ideas that people at first find strange but soon come to possess and use as familiar conceptions.” He had to defend it against the charge of mysticism. Yet he also noted that the idea of the unconscious on its own was thought fanciful until Freud pointed to its existence, and it became part of our understanding of why people think and act the way as they do. Freud had assumed the unconscious to be a personal thing contained within an individual. Jung, on the other hand, saw the personal unconscious mind as sitting atop a much deeper universal layer of consciousness, the collective unconscious – the inherited part of the human psyche not developed from personal experience.

The collective unconscious was expressed through 'archetypes', universal thought-forms or mental images that influenced an individual's feelings and action. The experience of archetypes often paid little heed to tradition or cultural rules, which suggests that they are innate projections. A newborn baby is not a blank slate but comes wired ready to perceive certain archetypal patterns and symbols. This is why children fantasize so much, Jung believed: they have not experienced enough of reality to cancel out their mind's enjoyment of archetypal imagery.

Archetypes have been expressed as myths and fairytales, and at a personal level in dreams and visions. In mythology they are called 'motifs', in anthropology 'représentations collectives'. German ethnologist Adolf Bastian referred to them as 'elementary' or 'primordial' thoughts that he saw expressed again and again in the cultures of tribal and folk peoples. But they are not simply of anthropological interest; usually without knowing it, archetypes shape the relationships that matter in our lives.

Archetypes and complexes

Jung highlighted a number of archetypes, including the 'anima', the 'mother', the 'shadow', the 'child', the 'wise old man', the 'spirits' of fairytales, and the 'trickster' figure found in myths and history. We look at two below.

The Anima

Anima means soul with a female form. In mythology it is expressed as a siren, a mermaid, a wood-nymph, or any form which 'infatuates young men and sucks the life out of them'. In ancient times, the anima came represented either as a goddess or a witch – that is, aspects of the female which were out of men's control.

When a man 'projects' the feminine aspect within his psyche onto an actual woman, that woman takes on magnified importance. The archetype makes itself present in a man's life either by infatuation, idealization or fascination with women. The woman herself does not really justify these reactions, but acts as the target to which his anima is transferred. This is why the loss of a relationship can be so devastating to a man. It is the loss of a side of him that he has kept external.

Every time there is an extreme love or fantasy or entanglement, the anima is at work in both sexes. She does not care for an orderly life, but wants intensity of experience - life, in whatever form. The anima, like all archetypes, may come upon us like fate. She can enter our life either as something wonderful or as something terrible – either way her aim is to wake us up. To recognize the anima means throwing away our rational ideas of how life should be lived, and instead admitting, as Jung puts it, that “Life is crazy and meaningful at once”.

The anima is profoundly irrational – and yet she carries great wisdom. When she comes into your life it may seem like chaos, but it is only later that we are able to divine her purpose.

The Mother

The Mother archetype takes the form of personal mother, grandmother, stepmother, mother in law, nurse, governess. It can be fulfilled in figurative Mothers such as Mary Mother of God, Sophia, or the Mother who becomes a maiden again in the myth of Demeter and Kore. Other Mother symbols include the Church, country, the Earth, the woods, the sea, a garden, a ploughed field, a spring or well. The positive aspect of the archetype is Motherly love and warmth, so celebrated in art and poetry, which gives us our first identity in the world. Yet it can have negative meaning – the loving mother or the terrible mother or goddess of fate. Jung considered the Mother the most important archetype because it seemed to contain all else.

When there is an imbalance of the archetype in a person, we see the Mother 'complex'. In men, the complex may give rise to 'Don Juanism', which can make a man fixated on pleasing all women. Yet a man with a mother complex may also have a revolutionary spirit: tough, persevering, extremely ambitious.

In women, the complex can result in an exaggeration of the maternal instinct, with a woman living for her children, sacrificing her individuality. Her husband becomes just part of the furniture. Men may be initially attracted to women with a mother complex because they are the picture of femininity and innocence. Yet they are also screens onto which a man can project or externalize his anima, and he only later discovers the real woman he has married.

In other forms of the archetype, a woman will go to any lengths to not be like her biological mother. She may carve out a sphere of her own, for example becoming an intellectual to show up her mother's lack of education. A choice of marriage partner may be to antagonize and move away from the mother. Other women in the hold of the archetype may have an unconscious incestuous relationship with the biological father and jealousy of the mother. They may become interested in married men or having romantic adventures.

* * * *

Jung noted that in evolutionary terms the unconscious came well before the development conscious thought. Yet in its youthful enthusiasm the conscious mind feels it can defy or deny its deeper counterpart; it is all-powerful while the unconscious seems a murky irrelevance. Yet he believed that “Man's worst sin is unconsciousness”. We project everything we internally don't like or can't accept onto the world, so that we wage war instead of studying ourselves. It is a case of 'anything but self-knowledge' – but in the end we pay the price, whether as individuals or collectively.

Spiritual archetypes

Why is psychology as a science so young? Jung suggests it was because for most of human history it simply wasn't necessary. The wonderful imagery and mythology of religions was able to express the eternal archetypes perfectly. People feel a need to dwell upon ideas and images relating to rebirth and transformation, and religions supply these in abundance for every aspect of the psyche. The Catholic Church's strange ideas of the Virgin Birth and the Trinity are not fanciful images but packed with meaning, Jung wrote, archetypes of protection and healing that administered to any ruptures in the minds of the faithful.

The Protestant Reformation reacted against all this. The rich Catholic imagery and dogma became nothing but 'superstition', and in Jung's view this attitude made way for the barrenness of contemporary life. Genuine spirituality must engage both the unconscious and the conscious mind, the depths as well as the heights.

Jung observed the trend of people in the West flocking to Eastern spirituality, but felt this was hardly necessary given the depth of meaning embedded in the Christian tradition. Another result was that that people are attracted to political and social ideas that were “distinguished by their spiritual bleakness”.

Humans have a religious instinct, Jung believed, whether it is a belief in God or in some secular faith like communism or atheism. “No one can escape the prejudice of being human” he observed.

Individuation

'Individuation' was Jung's term for the point when a person is finally able to integrate the opposites within them - their conscious and unconscious minds. Individuation simply means to become what you always were in potentia, to fulfil your unique promise. The result is an individual in the real sense of the word, a whole and indestructible self that can no longer be hijacked by splintered aspects or complexes.

But this reintegration does not happen by thinking about it rationally. It is a journey with unexpected twists and turns. Many myths show how we need to follow a path that transcends reason in order to fulfill ourselves in life. Jung went to some length to define the self. He understood it to be something different from the ego; in fact the self incorporated the ego, “just as a large circle encloses a smaller one”. While the ego relates to the conscious mind, the self belongs to the personal and collective unconscious.

The healing mandala

Jung included in Archetypes and the Collective Unconscious many reproductions of mandalas, abstract patterned images whose name in Sanskrit means 'circle'. He believed that when a person draws or paints a mandala, unconscious leanings or wants are expressed in its patterns, symbols and shapes.

In his therapeutic practice, Jung found mandalas to have a 'magical' effect, reducing confusion in the psyche to order, and often affecting a person in ways that only became apparent later. They worked because the unconscious is allowed free reign; what has been swept under comes to the surface. Motifs such as egg shapes, a lotus flower, a star or sun, a snake, castles, cities, eyes, etc. are produced for no obvious reason, yet reflect or draw out processes that are going on deep below that person's conscious thinking. When a person became able to make a meaningful interpretation of the images, Jung observed that it was usually the beginning of psychological healing. It was one step taken in the individuation process.

Final comments

We think we are modern and civilized with all our technology and knowledge, but inside, Jung says, we are still 'primitives'. He once observed in Switzerland a Strudel, a local witch-doctor, remove a spell from a stable – in the shadow of a railway line on which several trans-European expresses roared by.

Modernity does not do away with the need for us to attend to our unconscious minds. If we do neglect this side of us, the archetypes simply look for new forms of expression, in the process derailing our carefully made plans. Usually the unconscious supports our conscious decisions, but when a gap appears the archetypes are expressed in strange and powerful ways; we can be ambushed by lack of self-knowledge.

The universe of ancient symbols we once used for deciphering life's changes and larger meaning has been replaced by a science – psychology - that was never designed to understand the soul and cater to it. Writing of the scientific mindset in general, Jung wrote: “Heaven has become for us the cosmic space of the physicists...But 'the heart glows,' and a secret unrest gnaws at the roots of our being.” Modern man or woman lives with a spiritual emptiness that was once easily filled by religion or mythology. Only a new type of psychology that actually recognized the depth of the psyche would be able to quell this secret unrest.

When it seems you are helpless in the face of problems, it should be remembered that this deeper mind carries the totality of human experience, a vast store of objective wisdom and perfect solutions. It only has to be recognized and accessed. The archetypal vortex. From the Journal of Borderland Research, Vol XLV. Super Quantum Speed in No Time

[hopplessilse]

Fetish II. Eyes don´t lie

Teacher!joel x f!student 18+ explicit minors dni

Serie masterlist

Summary: Mr. Miller gives you more attention than ever, you are his priority, you want to become his favorite student, so a visit to his office doesn't hurt anyone, you just want him to help you solve the topic of your thesis.

Word count: 9.5 k

Warnings: Teacher-student, age gab (reader in her early 20's, joel in his late 40's) pet names, sexual fantasies, flirtation, slow burn (not so slow), Feeling of guilt, Mention and consumption of alcohol, hangover, Mention on teacher/student relationship, Swallowing medicine pills, Mention of vomiting (nothing explicit), Professor Miller's Aftercare, they are both two consenting adults, fear of being found out.

Friday.

"Good day, students. Today we're going to talk about two branches of anthropology that are very important for understanding human nature: physiological anthropology and pragmatic anthropology," Joel said, walking in front of the class and writing the title on the board.

It was a fact that that crush was now an obsession, you didn't know how to get Joel out of your head, you couldn't help but romanticize every single thing he did or said, you beat yourself up mentally for sexualizing him, but it was kind of impossible to stop when the clothes he wore fit him ridiculously well, it was impossible for him to look attractive with everything. The vest he wore over his white shirt was ridiculously hot, you never imagined him with a vest and now, you can't get the image out of your head.

"First of all, physiological anthropology" He paused, looking at everyone in the room

"Physiological anthropology is the branch of anthropology that studies the biological dimension of the human being. It deals with the physical and psychological characteristics that are common to all human beings, regardless of their culture or era"

You could feel your body present, but your head was somewhere else, thinking about so many things that have nothing to do with matter

"Some of the topics that physiological anthropology studies are:

|Human Anatomy

|Human Physiology

|Human Psychology

|Human Evolution"

His gaze passed over your seat, several times, but you didn't realize it because you were so gone that you didn't know what he was talking about, you only saw his lips move, the pen around his fingers as he wrote on the blackboard what you assumed were subtopics, the truth is that you don't even know.

From Joel's perspective he assumed you were paying attention, as you saw him with furrowed brows and followed his steps, but the moment he stared at you, saw how your eyes were gone, he could perceive that you were not quite present in the class.

"Physiological anthropology helps us understand how the human body works, how we think and feel, and how we have evolved as a species" He finally says, adjusting his glasses on the bridge of his nose, arms crossed as he walks back in front of the class, looking at everyone as he continues to explain.

"Now Pragmatic Anthropology is the branch of anthropology that studies the cultural dimension of the human being. It deals with human characteristics that are a product of culture, such as values, beliefs, customs, and social norms.

Some of the topics that pragmatic anthropology studies are:

|Culture

|The Society

|Education

|Religion

|The Art

Pragmatic anthropology helps us understand how human society is constructed, how values and beliefs are transmitted, and how emotions and feelings are expressed" He paused, took a breath, and asked, looking at the whole class

"Could any of you tell me what's the difference between the two?" he look at the blackboard and look at them again, some whispered some answers but with the fear of making a mistake they said nothing.

"Miss" he said your last name 1 time, you didn't listen, you just saw that his eyes were glued to you, he named you for the second time and your friend nudged you. At that moment you felt your body for the first time since he entered the room, a shiver ran down your spine, while you saw your friend.

She just made a gesture to you with her eyes open, you know she scolded you mentally. You looked back at Joel and he was arms crossed 'shit in that pose yes he looks bigger and stronger, concentrate' looking at you over his glasses, his lips were sealed and his expression was serious as he watched you, you could feel all the eyes on you waiting for your answer.

"Sorry?" You apologized by looking down and looking at him again "I didn't hear the question" You interlaced your fingers in your lap nervously as you mentally begged him not to humiliate you.

"i ask who knows the difference between the two topics we just talked about" He looked at you as he got closer so he could get a better look at you since you were in the third row, a little out of reach.

"I… I don't know," you said nervously, shaking your head softly

You saw him duck his head as a sarcastic laugh came from his lips, shaking his head, walking up the stairs, walking down the hallway that left him in front of you and looking into your eyes, you could see disappointment in them.

"Of course you don't know, you didn't pay attention to a single word that was said" he said seriously, his words hurt you, and more because everyone listened while looking at you

"if you are in my class it is to learn, I don't stand here every day so that the words go in one ear and out the other" this time he said to everyone, his voice sounding deeper as he walked away from you and down the stairs returning to the center

A silence covered the room for a few seconds when a squeaky female voice made itself present, you shrugged your shoulders as you felt your ears bleed at the sound of that voice.

"Go ahead, Miss Vince," this time Joel's voice sounded calmer and softer

"The main difference between physiological anthropology and pragmatic anthropology is that the first deals with human characteristics that are common to all human beings, while the second deals with human characteristics that are a product of culture"

"That's right, as clear as water" He looked at you and you just looked down at your lap where your cold hands were hiding.

"Physiological anthropology is more objective, as it is based on observation and experimentation. Pragmatic anthropology, on the other hand, is more subjective, as it is based on the interpretation of cultural phenomena" He said, going back to the blackboard and writing the key words on it.

You felt so small, you felt a lump in your throat, you felt an anger inside you, you tried to control your heavy breathing. You looked at your hands and you could see and feel the waterline in your eyes fill with tears, you didn't want to cry, not in front of them, not in front of him, you didn't want him to see the power he had over you. You took a deep breath, wiping your eyes quickly, as you looked straight ahead and made a note in your notebook.

"In conclusion, physiological anthropology and pragmatic anthropology are two fundamental branches of anthropology since they help us to understand human nature in all its complexity, both in its biological dimension and in its cultural dimension"

The rest of the class went on normally, you just didn't look at him, you just listened and looked at the blackboard to make notes of what he wrote. You were quiet for the rest of the class, even when roll call you just raised your hand, at the end he just let them read a file that he would send them.

You left the room without even looking at him and hurried out. It was 6:30 a.m., with Mr. Miller's class being the last. Even though you had an appointment with the student counselor, that's why you had to run since she was leaving early.

"Where are you going?" shouted your friend seeing you hurrying down the hallway

"I have to catch up with ava, I need to talk to her" you yelled back saying goodbye with your hand in the air and disappearing around the corner.

Being true you wanted to get out of that room as soon as possible, you couldn't stand the presence of everyone around you, let alone his presence, you really felt hurt, you knew he was right, you weren't paying attention, but it wasn't necessary for him to talk to you in that hurtful tone, it was the first time you saw him angry, And you're the reason.

Your high heels echoed off the shiny floor of the school as you walked down the stairs, walked a few doors along the hallway into one that said 'teachers' office'. Past the doors you could see a long corridor that led you into the offices, several Victorian-style windows and within the space were scattered the offices of each director of the school.

You walked to the right where the office of ava, the student counselor, a beautiful lady who had been working at the university for 10 years. You knocked a couple of times on the wooden door and from inside you heard 'come in'.

You walked in closing the door behind you and when you met her gaze you gave her a smile.

"Hello" she said your name "Good afternoon, how are you?" she said in an enthusiastic voice, whenever you saw her she looked happy, you didn't know how she could be in a good mood being locked in those 4 walls.

"hi, Well thank you, how are you?"

"Oh, I'm fine honey, tell me what brings you here," she said, adjusting her glasses and leaving some sheets beside her.

You sat in the chair in front of her desk and left your backpack on the floor

"Well… I wanted to talk to you about my thesis topic"

"Okay… How can I help you?"she crossed her hands in front of her at the desk.

"I thought maybe you could… Or well, I know you studied psychology, right?"

"That's right," she nodded, taking a sip of her coffee

"Well, my thesis talks about transpersonal anthropology, and I know there's a topic in psychology about that, and I wanted to know if you could give me some important points about that, or your knowledge in it," you said kindly giving her a smile

"Of course honey, it's just a long topic and I have to run home, so how about Monday you come and we talk about it."

"Sounds great"

"How about 2 p.m.?"

"Yes, I'm free at that time"

"Perfect" A knock interrupted your talk, Ava gave way and a head peeked out of the door

"I'm sorry to interrupt Ava, but Professor Miller came looking for you a while ago and asked me if you could stop by his office for a moment before you left"

"Of course, thank you for letting me know" they closed the door and you and Ava got up from their chairs "What subject does Professor Miller give you?" she said as she took her things and put them in her bag

"Mmh philosophical anthropology" you bent down taking your backpack and passing it over your shoulder

"It would be very good for you to talk to him about your thesis, He knows more than I do because he reads a lot about the different branches of anthropology."

"Amm I hadn't thought of it" you said showing a forced smile as you followed her to the door, she opened and gave you space to go after her, she locked the door and looked at you

"Come with me, we'll tell Professor Miller if he knows about it" she said as she walked past you, you stood with the word in your mouth

"Amm… No.. I don't think he have time" You couldn't help but get nervous as you walked down the hallway to his office, this being one of the last at the end of the hallway

"Of course he has time, he's gone until 8," she said as she greeted the teachers who passed by you. "I love his office, it has a beautiful view of the forest behind campus" she look at you over her shoulder before knocking twice on the wooden door that said in black letters on the glass 'Mr. Miller'

"Come in," a deep voice rang out, sounded from inside through the door.

Ava came in first greeting Joel kindly. You stayed outside, you took a deep breath before peeking out of the doorway, making Joel aware of your presence, making the smile on her face slowly disappear as you entered and closed the door behind you, staying leaning into it looking at both of them.

Your breathing quickened a little more as your eyes met, you didn't want to be there, you didn't want to see him and you guess he didn't want to see you either. You looked at Ava and smiled nervously at her, clasping your hands behind you.

"We hope we don't interrupt Professor Miller" said Ava standing in front of his desk

"Not at all Ava, Amm" he look at you and look back at her "I wanted to tell you about the student outing that will be done at the end of the month" he said playing with the pen he had in his hands

"Of course of course, we must change some details about that...amm I have the itinerary in digital, If you want, I can send it to you and talk about it on Monday."

"Of course that would be wonderful" he nodded quickly and took a deep breath seeing the two of you with a tight smile on his lips

"Oh it's true haha" she walked over to you and took you by the shoulder approaching you to the desk, making you being closer right in front of him, she said your name "wanted to ask you if you have any knowledge about transpersonal psychology, It's for her thesis on transpersonal anthropology"

God, she looks like your mom speaking for you.

"I have knowledge on both subjects," he said, looking at her and not you.

"Perfect, I told you he knew," she said smiling at you and you just smiled back "Can she stay so you can explain a little about the subject?"

Your eyes widened looking at her "I don't think Professor Miller has time for that" you said laughing nervously, shaking your head.

"Well… I'll stay a few more hours, so I have time," he said looking at you, this time his voice sounded deeper

You stared at him for a moment swallowing, felt your ears rumble.

"You see, Professor Miller is always there to attend to his students, see you on Monday Mr. Miller" Ava said goodbye as she made her way to the door, Joel said goodbye, and you only felt the air from the door blow behind you, feeling Joel's presence heavier than ever.

"Take a seat" he said, pointing with his hand to the chair in front of him

You sat down leaving your things aside, you breathed deeply. You watched the room as he got up and picked up some papers on the shelf in the corner.

His office really was big for a simple professor. There were two large windows behind his desk, the ceiling was twice as high as the rest of the school, there was a brown leather armchair at the other end of the room, a coffee table in front of it and a warm light lamp on one side of the armchair. Several bookshelves adorned the walls, some paintings and recognitions.

His desk was kept simple, a laptop, papers on one end and a few books on the other end, his glasses were kept on one side of his case while a coffee cup was kept empty on the other side of the laptop. His office was kept lit by a few warm lamps that he had around the office. The little light of the cloudy afternoon came in through the windows, which were kept open letting the cold breeze into the cozy cube.

Your teeth gnashed from the cold coming in, as the afternoon was cold at this time of year. You were dressed in jeans, your top being a white long-sleeved shirt but a little open at the chest, revealing your collarbones and your locket hanging from your neck.

Joel walked back to the desk, leaving some papers on the side of the laptop.

"Okay" sat down in front of you as he leaned back in the chair and let out a heavy exhale from his lips "Tell me you'd like to know" his lips moved as he rested his right arm on the armrest of his desk chair and rested his thumb under his jaw, index and middle finger on the hundred and the others rolled into his palm.

You couldn't breathe properly, it was hard to inhale and exhale slowly. It makes you feel strange to be in his office alone, like those old days, you were only in the same situation once, but it was for no seconds, now it was different, because it was you and only you who was with him, without people to take his attention away from you.

"Well…" You breathed as you watched as he swallowed and his Adam's apple went down and up, while his gaze stayed on you, serious. "I have an initial basis for my thesis, the introduction, which is transpersonal anthropology and psychological anthropology, but… I wanted to talk about both fields but it's a bit impossible since it's too much of both subjects"

"It's not impossible if you're talking about topics that are intertwined between the transpersonal and the psychological, you would have to investigate if any research of this type has already been done, so you can have some sustenance or support"

You were about to speak when he interrupted you

"And why don't you focus on a specific topic about transpersonal anthropology?

"Because I'm still interested in psychology, and I think it's something that can go hand in hand with the transpersonal in the social area" you said, clapping your palms in your lap, while smiling at him with sealed lips.

He smiled at you, nodding.

"Can I see your research preview? If it doesn't bother you"

"Sure," you took out your cell phone and opened the file. You held it out to him, he reached out and took it in his hands, making your phone look small in his hand.

He looked at the screen as his hand reached out to grab the glasses that were next to him and put them on, you looked at him and you could see the reflection of your cell phone in his glasses as he rested his elbows on the wood of the desk.

You watched as he wagged his finger up on the screen, you could see through his glasses as his eyes moved following the letters on the screen. You could hear his breathing, which honestly bothered you a little bit when people breathed too hard, ugh you couldn't stand that but… Being him was fine. You moved your foot impatiently and nervously, something Mr. Miller could notice.

"Do you want coffee?" he said as he looked at you through his glasses, and the fine lines on his forehead were present.

"n.. no, I'm fine," you let out a small nervous laugh. He only nodded, smiling slightly and looking back at the screen.

"Don't be nervous then" echoed in your ears along with his hoarse tone of voice, that tone you longed to hear close to your ear, that delirious.

"I'm not nervous, just impatient" you said looking at your heels while keeping your hands crossed in front of your chest.

You saw how he put his arm down and put your phone on the desk and slid it towards you. You watched your cell phone rest on the wood with the screen on, you saw the small black letters that were written on that screen, and you could see that he had read to the end of the document.

"I think it's okay," you looked up and saw that he had crossed his arms while he saw you still with his glasses on.

"Just okay?" you looked at him incredulously and frowned.

"What do you want me to say? It's only 3 leaves," he said seriously, without taking his eyes off you.

"Won't you tell me that I need to expand the introduction further? check my spelling mistakes, that I need to paraphrase the texts well"

He bit his lip and denied

"No, I think you have everything under control" You stared at him in silence "did you expect me to tell you something else?" he said raising an eyebrow

"A little yeah... you used to correct me only by the index of work" you said quietly, looking at your heels.

You heard how a little laugh sounded from his chest, you looked up and he smiled at you, you saw in his eyes such a beautiful sparkle.

"You're so cute" Your chest would explode if he told you that

"Well, if you put index inside it… It's very obvious that it's wrong, sweetheart"

Shit, did he… Did he actually call me sweetheart?

"Sorry..." you said in a whisper

"You don't have to say sorry, it's okay," he said, looking down at his arms.

"I'm sorry to expect a lot from you always"

He looked up in eye contact, and you saw his face turn into surprise and confusion at your confession.

"What do you mean?" This time he lower his arms so he can get closer to the desk and be close to you, with the wood being the only thing separating you both.

You sighed as you saw his confused expression. You should be honest with him, let him know how you feel about him as your teacher.

"Honestly…"You paused to breathe "You are my favorite teacher, from the first day you taught us I saw the passion you had, how much you like to help your students… and I.. I just want to be as good as you."

You looked at him in silence as he processed what you said

"You are very smart and you know about everything, I wish I was good at everything and that it was easy, that I could know the subject easily" you sighed heavily "I know you expect a lot from me, and I'm sorry I didn't pay attention in class today, I know you put effort into your work and I know you want us to learn as much as possible, I really shouldn't have lost focus"

He didn't need to know all that, but you were frustrated by his class, and you felt like he wasn't evaluating you properly because of your attitude. He was silent for a few more seconds, maybe you had sounded pathetic when you said all that… Was it too much to say?

"Sorry, I didn't mean to sound pathetic"

"Don't apologize please" You looked at him and he was already looking at you. "It's nice that you tell me that I'm your role model, I know you're an amazing student, i can see that you're determined to get what you want, you're responsible, you have ethics, that says a lot about the person you are" he smiled at you "and the class… Don't worry, I know I'm not always going to get 100% attention, and I shouldn't have talked to you like that in front of everyone, I apologize for that." You could see the regret in his eyes

"Thank you" you nodded and gave him a half-smile, he smiled back nodding

"and just to be clear… You're also my favorite student" a mischievous smile appeared on his lips as his eyes narrowed.

You gawked at him as you watched as he stood up, grabbed his cup, and walked to the coffee maker behind him, with his back to you, a perfect view of his back.

"Really?" you couldn't help but sound happy and confused at the same time

"Yes," he said, still with his back turned

"Since when?" he was going to speak but you interrupted him "Is it because I said you're my favorite teacher?"

You heard him laugh and look at you over his shoulder. He fell silent looking at you and you just frowned, waiting for his answer eagerly.

He turned around and replied

"since the first time I saw you, last semester"

Your smile faded, your mouth dried up, you felt your hands turn cold.

Was it true? Or was he screwing you? For a moment you thought about that day… And was it impossible for you to remember everything, what he had seen in you that day? As far as you can remember, you were quiet the whole class, you only participated by telling him your name and some of your hobbies, but other than that… You don't remember saying anything interesting about the class. You wouldn't let curiosity kill you, so you bravely decided to ask him

"what did you see in me that day?" You leaned your elbow on the desk and your fist held your jaw as you stared at him.

He turned around with a blue mug in his hand walking to the desk, putting the cup in front of you. You looked at him confused.

"I didn't ask you for one"

while he went to the coffee maker taking his cup he replied

"take it, I don't accept a no"

You smiled, you looked at the coffee and saw that it was black.

"Amm I don't like black coffee"

He finished filling his cup. He walked silently to the side of the coffee maker and took a small piece of cardboard, walked with both hands full, left his cup in front of his chair and held out the cardboard, you took it and looked at the letters, 'vanilla flavored milk' it said on the front.

You smiled at him in appreciation. It was a bit odd that he had this in his office, as you always saw him drinking black coffee all over school, he didn't look like someone who drank lattes, and less vanilla flavored.

You filled your cup a little with the milk, closed it, and set it aside. While Joel was looking at the furniture full of books that sat at the other end of his desk, in front of these two pieces of furniture was a dark olive-green three-seater armchair, it was spacious.

You don't know how many times you'd admired how good he looked, it was ridiculous the space it has in your mind, the number of times you think how fine it looks.

You took the coffee, and left it on the desk when you saw Joel approaching you. Joel came back to you but this time with a book in hand, left it on the desk and sat down in his chair.

"This book could be useful for your research, and for you to learn a little more about anthropology"

You brought it closer to you' Transpersonal Anthropology. Society, Culture, Reality and Consciousness, DIEGO R. VIEGAS ́ you read on the cover of the book.

"You've given me a book before, remember?" you said, double-tapping the book.

"And?" he take from his coffee looking at you through his glasses

"Why do you give me another one?"

before answering you he taste the taste of coffee in his mouth, lick his lips and look at you.

"It's for my favorite student to learn and I don't go around scolding her in class"

You felt your cheeks burn, you looked down, but not before seeing how he smiled and crossed his arms.

Heck, he knows the effect that had on you.

You laughed, trying not to sound nervous. Was he making you nervous on purpose? Even though it was somewhat innocent the way he did it, but why call you his favorite student and give you 2 books from his bookshelf, you would never do that, your books are sacred to you, you would only recommend them and that's it, but give it to someone? You should appreciate that person so much to do such an act, even love him too much.

"You didn't answer my question," you said as you sipped from the cup, looking at him over the blue pottery

You saw how he smiled and shook his head. He scratched his beard, which was adorned by some gray hair on both sides of his jaw.

"I remember … You were at the front of the class, I thought you would be one of the ones who talked all the time, but you never participated, you just nodded to what your classmates were saying, and I thought 'what a weird girl, why being at the front when you don't participate' only heard your voice when you introduced yourself, and knowing what you liked to read… I liked you immediately, It made me tender to see you nod and take note, you are very calm, and you have a lot of knowledge, even if it is hard for you to believe it"

You didn't know that he had noticed you that way from the first day, he took the time to study you between classes, that he would be interested in you because of your taste in reading. It felt strange in any way that he would tell you that, it felt very… private, very personal. Some teachers would just say that because you were responsible and paying attention, they were satisfied with that, but not Joel, he saw something in you that you weren't sure was visible to you, it's like what you see in him.

You remembered the way he treated you, the warm, soft tone of voice in which he addressed you. The smile that appeared on his face when you approached his desk, how his eyes sought you when he asked them to participate, the attention he paid when you presented a topic in class. All the attention you felt you had at the beginning became less and less as the months went by, but whenever you sought him he was there for you. And now… You felt all the pressure on you.

"Well… I wasn't the only one who knew" you shook your head grimacing, you lowered your gaze and looked at your red nails "there were other colleagues who were more diligent"

"No one like you" you looked up shy to see a different reaction in their eyes. You swallowed and just denied it.

You had exactly one name on the tip of your tongue, a name that had been on your mind the previous semester, you were afraid to say it, to say it in front of it, but it's a perfect opportunity that you wouldn't pass up.

"Melissa" you finally said, you tried to sound as normal as possible.

You looked up and as you had imagined. His face changed, his eyes turned dark and his features hardened, he tried to disguise it with his tone when answering.

"What about her?" he leaned over the desk and intertwined his fingers on the desk.

"She was just like me… passionate about the same topics, but she did participate" you smiled nodding, pretending you liked her.

"Well," he paused and took a moment to think and blink as he looked at you, "I think… She was different from you… From what I saw in class, I don't think you should compare yourself to her"

You held his gaze when he finished speaking. You didn't know how he did it, but if you knew what really happened, you'd say he's good at lying.

"I'm not comparing myself, I'm just saying she could have been your favorite student too" You shrugged and took one last sip of the coffee in front of you.

"I don't usually go around thinking about who my next star student will be, but you'd be surprised to know that you're the first favorite student I have"

You laughed, shaking your head and covering your mouth with your palm as you laughed. On the move you caught him directing his eyes at your body, but it was in the blink of an eye.

"I must be special, I guess"

"You must be," he smiled at you, showing his teeth as he looked at you with a twinkle in his eye.

Sunday.

The smell of the night after it rained was something different, the breeze whipping through the curtains of your room, the sky full of gray clouds too big to cover the sky in its entirety. The street outside your house was silent, you could only hear the heavy air squealing out your window breaking through. You were lying on your bed, while it was being kept tidy you only had an old blanket on top of you, in fact it was from one of your favorite childhood movies, high school musical.

You had two pillows behind your head for extra support. Your eyes stayed focused on the show you were watching. For you, Sundays meant resting and not talking to anyone, there was something about Sundays that felt different from the other days of the week. Normally you didn't go out, you weren't a person who liked to go out all the time, your social battery drained very quickly if there were too many people.

As you ran your hand over the locket hanging from your neck, you remembered that first week of the previous semester, the way Joel noticed that you had changed your necklace.

"What happened to the previous one?" he said, his arms crossed as he leaned his hips against your desk.

"I put it away, don't you like this one?"

"It's very nice, you must keep something very precious inside"

"I don't put anything in it yet" you laughed slightly

"Well, when you do I want to know"

It was part of you, of your personality, it was attached to you by some invisible rope that you didn't know how to detect, the feeling, the power that made that necklace so special to you. It's like with Joel, you didn't know what force brought you closer to him, you didn't know what contained that human being who made your thoughts his, maybe you maintained a closeness that no teacher/student would have, but for you it was something innocent and vague, he was just doing his job helping you with your work.

The comment your friend had made to you ran through your mind over and over again 'no teacher would express himself like that about a student, let alone tell her that she is his favorite student, I doubt that any teacher in his life has had one'. You didn't want to think that he might have a little interest in you, because if you look at it from his point of view… What the hell could he see in you? You weren't mature or attractive enough to be with him, plus it's impossible to have any kind of relationship with him.

Things after Friday had been different, despite not seeing him for 1 day, you couldn't stop thinking about his gaze, how he smiled when he looked at you, the seriousness on his face when you named melisa. You really wanted it all to be a lie, you begged it wasn't the kind of teacher who sexually harasses his students until they get what they want. If you ever had a chance to be with him, you wanted to be the only one, you wanted to be special to him.

Even if you thought you were deluded because let's face it, he is an adult man, older by almost 26 years, he has a life made, he has stability, he is a mature person full of experiences, he is single, attractive, he can have any woman with him if he wants, so why settle for a 21-year-old girl who on top off that is his student who has damn mental and commitment problems, and in need of attention all the damn time.

Hell, you were so dam hard to yourself at times but you had to keep your feet on the ground. You were damn smart that you knew that if you got into the game it was going to be easy to get out of it, you shouldn't take it so seriously, you'd let everything flow in its wake.

You know he needs a woman, but you could give him what no one has done for him, you wanted to be his weakness so badly, you wanted him to beg you to be his… and you wanted to beg him to make you his again and again.

Your thoughts tormented you when you were alone, you couldn't help but think about different things at once, for you there was no such thing as the phrase "one crisis at a time" you worried about something that didn't happen yet or you didn't know if it was going to happen, and to top it all off, you thought if there was a solution when the only damn solution is to stop thinking about it.

Your brain was talking to you too much and that's why you overthought things. You were halfway through the series when your cell phone vibrated against the wooden surface of your desk next to your bed.

It was your friend who had sent a message. You grabbed your phone and lay back down. The screen of your phone lit up your face making your eyes narrow from the flash, you smiled as you read your friend's message.

You better be dressed up, I'll pick you up in 10 minutes, I don't take no for an answer

Does being in my pajamas work for you?

Don't fuck with me, let's go to a karaoke bar, I'll give you another 5 more minutes

You sighed when you read the last message.

You didn't know what to wear, you were thinking about a dress and a jacket but the day was very cool and you would probably freeze to death when you left your house. Your best bet was jeans that fit beautifully, black heeled boots that reached below the knee, and a black backless t-shirt and denim jacket.

As your friend promised, I'll arrive at the time she agreed for you. They arrived at the karaoke bar, which you had never been to, it was a good atmosphere, a central place with a lot of people. Inside was a place with blue, purple, yellow, and pink lights illuminating the place, and some warm lights so as not to overwhelm the view so much.

They were round tables, each one separate from the other, the stage was at the back of the place, it wasn't that deep, you could see the people from the entrance perfectly.There were 2 sections as one was karaoke and the other was a bar, but they were connected by the bar where you could turn around and see everyone on the other side.

Since the place was very popular, they had to enlarge the place, and some people who didn't enjoy being among the hustle and bustle so much went to the other end. There were people of all ages around. You walked inside the place and Katy Perry's roar song was playing all over the place.

Even if you didn't know how to sing well, people had fun, no one was judging, it was all laughter and shouting encouraging people to sing and dance.

They approached a table that was relatively in the center, and other girls they knew from college from another major were at the table. When you saw them you greeted each other happily, you took off your jacket and left it on the back of the chair, sat down and chatted for a moment before others got up to sing. You and your friend decided to go to the bar for drinks for all four of you.

"This place is sick" you said, looking around the place as you waited for drinks.

"I know, how come you've never come" she tapped her fingers on the dark wood

"You know I don't usually come this way"

"I'll have to get you out, you can find someone to have fun with"

"So you get them from here?" You said laughing mockingly

"Yes, but I get them from the other section"

They both turned to the front and saw a few men between 35 and forty-something, up to 50. You could see them coming in and out of the bar, many of them were looking at karaoke.

"So you're going to that section just for that?" You looked at her and she laughed slightly

"I use the bathroom too" you both laughed.

They returned to the table with the drinks. Time passed slowly, the atmosphere was so good that the four of them got carried away and drank a little more, but since you were not used to drinking your friends held it better than you without a doubt. You laughed, sang and danced like everyone else in the room.

You were so gone that you didn't know that one of your friends had put them on the list to go up and sing.

"It's going to be our turn" the redhead said, drinking from her glass.

"What for?" you said, wiping the drink residue from your lips.

"we´re gonna sing buddy!" the blonde said screaming as she got up from her seat.

If you had been in your 5 senses you would be nervous, dying of anxiety, resisting but since you were under the influence of alcohol, you stood up dancing. You didn't think of anything, you didn't rush for a moment, you decided it was your time, you felt good, it was in the air so, why not?

They were passing by the tables when they were called.

"The next group will sing, a round of applause for these beautiful ladies" Applause and some whistles were present when they took the stage.

..............................

"You guys said it would be a bar, not this place," Joel said as he wrinkled his nose.

"Come on men, this place is amazing"

"and let's not forget that you can find beauties here"

Joel had gone to the same karaoke/bar with his friends, they had been to that place many times, Joel let´s say he was not a fan of karaoke.

They came in and heard applause and whistles from the people. The place was a little more crowded when he arrived, they went to the bar next to the karaoke and sat on the closest stools they could find.

"We have a good view tonight," said one of his friends who, like him, was a teacher, only he was a medical teacher.

They ordered their drinks, and before they could start talking, the melody of a song began to play.

"It's not the one they dedicated to you, doctor," he said with a laugh as Joel joined in.

"At least I had a reaction from a woman, tell me what you got?" he laughed

"Two beautiful children" he looked into his eyes

"crikey" Joel said, drinking from the bottle

You and your friends started singing, and Joel still didn't realize that two girls on stage were his students.

"I told them I wouldn't have as much time in class since I'd be doing work somewhere else" the doctor said, sipping from his beer bottle.

"Then you won't teach at the university anymore?" said Joel as he held the spout of the bottle.

"I think I have better opportunities in the other place, honestly it's overwhelming"

"overwhelming?" said the other "It's overwhelming to have kids, and a shitty job that pays the minimum monthly, plus you get the best, you can see beautiful and young girls without commitment"

The doctor and Joel looked at each other, shaking their heads, smiling.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you friend but… I don't work in that place for the girls" he said, shaking his head as he looked up at the stage,

"Joel?"

"No, I'm sorry, I don't either" he rub both palms into his jeans.

"you´re both idiots, you could be with whoever you wanted" he grabbed his beer and pointed to the singing girls.

"¡Carve my name into his leather seats!" the redhead sang at the top of her lungs.

"Just an example, imagine that those girls are your students, wouldn't you notice them?"

Both men turned to the stage, the doctor made a face and turned to look at him, while Joel cocked his head, observed and recognized one, your friend who did the chorus and danced, he laughed, and of the other 3 he was amazed when he saw you, he focused his eyes thinking if it was really you or was he hallucinating.

'is that…'

"Why do you keep thinking that?" said the doctor, tapping his friend's shoulder.

"I'm just saying, it's hypothetical" he looked at Joel and laughed "I think Joel did like the idea"

They both looked at Joel and he pointed his finger at both of you

"those two are my students" the two of them turned to see who he was referring to and made a surprised face, more than anything when they saw how one of them, I mean you, had your eyes narrowed trying to read the lyrics but without losing your style.

"Slash a hole in all four tires, maybe next time, he'll think before he cheats" You sang while hugging your friend.

"Are they your students? On a Sunday night, they'll be with a good hangover"

"da bomb" said the doctor raising his bottle in the direction of you toasting

"they won't be my problem tomorrow" said Joel laughing without taking his eyes off you when he saw your funny expressions and trying to concentrate on the lyrics.

When they finished singing, the audience applauded and whistled. They came down from the stage smiling and cheering each other on.

For your part, it had been an ecstasy of emotions, you were sweating from your forehead from so much dancing. They walked to their table and they all fell tired while laughing.

"That was incredible" shouted the blonde

"it was" said your friend drinking from her glass

"Shit, I'm sorry girls but I have to go to the bathroom" you said standing up, your friend got up too

"I'll go with you"

You both walked to the bathrooms on the side of the bar, a few glances turned to you. When I came out already refreshed, they were going through the bar when you got dizzy and stopped.

"Dizziness" you laughed lightly, leaning back on a bench that was alone.

"You've had a lot to drink, let me ask you for a water" your friend said as she asked for the bottle.

"Damn, that man is so cute" you murmured, taking the bottle that your friend held out already opened.

Your friend turned to see who you were referring to and her eyes almost popped out at who it was.

"Is that your boyfriend" she elbowed you and you frowned, confused,

"boyfriend?" you wrinkled your nose looking at her.

"Mr. Miller," she turned to look at you while smiling

"Shit" you muttered while squinting to get a better look

"It certainly looks good in casual clothes" your friend mentioned, looking at it the same way.

You got up and walked over to where he was, slowly approached with your friend behind you and raised your hand greeting him from afar, he smiled nervously at you.

"Mr. Miller!" you said excitedly, smiling at him.

"Hey you" he laughed when he saw you

"what a coincidence, professor" your friend said as she looked at the other two men.

"Shouldn't you be in bed at this hour?" said Joel, wanting to sound serious but failed to see you looking him up and down.

"Oh my God, I just found my father" your friend said sarcastically and you couldn't help but laugh.

"We just wanted to get closer and say…" You took a breath and looked at him "you look great tonight, Mr. Miller" You smiled, cocking your head and blinking. "You look very lonely, do you need company?"

Joel took a big breath and exhaled while laughing

"thanks for the compliment...and I'm not alone" he looked at his friends with a closed-lip smile and they just held back their laughter.

"Well… They're not going to know how to beg for it so..." you bit your lip.

"Okay, see you at the college Mr. Miller" your friend pulled you by the arm. You left laughing on the way to the table and your friend did the same.

"You're crazy" she said as you both sat down.

"Who's crazy?" said the blonde.

"She" pointed at you with her eyes "She dared to hint to our professor"

"Is your teacher here?" The blonde narrowed her eyes

"Wow, she's drunk" said the redhead, eating from the tortilla chips

They all laughed, you told them a little about your little crush, you pointed them out from afar, he was still at the bar with his friends, while you watched him talk animatedly.

From Joel's perspective, he found the way you expressed yourself very funny, you didn't hesitate to say what you thought, he liked it, you seemed like a totally different person from the girl he is used to seeing, quiet, reserved, shy, respectful and above all introverted, with a gentle and sweet look. The girl he saw through his eyes was someone else, but he didn't dislike it, he saw in you a girl who knows how to have fun, without care, flowing with the environment, being herself and not afraid to express whatever is on the tip of her tongue.

....................

Monday.

You cursed the moment you thought it would be a great idea to drink alcohol, until you were knocked unconscious in your friend's car. You'd beat yourself mentally while you were in the bathroom complaining about the migraine you had, while wiping your mouth with water.

"Shit, I can't stand it" You held your forehead with the palm of your hand as you came out of the bathroom.

You didn't want to go to the first hour, your head was exploding and you hadn't found any pills in your entire house, and on top of all that, you had an empty stomach.

You stared at the classroom door, debating whether or not to enter.

"Mmh" you stood in the hallway.

You thought about your options, and you thought it would be a good excuse to go to Ava and ask her for a migraine pill. You walked into the teachers' offices, visualized Ava's door but knocked and got no answer, and remembered that she was arriving a little later, after 8.

You saw the doors of some teachers and administrators open, but you didn't know any of them, you had no choice but to walk to the end of the hallway. You saw the door open and peeked out. He had his back to the door, as you would suppose he was pouring himself his coffee. You knocked twice on the door to get his attention. He turned around and was surprised.

"Good morning," he said hoarsely as he looked at you with a frown.

"Good morning" you said, poking out your whole body and standing at the door.

"Come in, tell me how I can help you" he put the cup down from under the coffee maker and rubbed his palms on his pants.

"Sorry for bothering so early," you winced.

God can't stand even my own voice.

"You're not a nuisance, tell me," he walked over to the coffee pot, looking at the cup.

"I wanted to know if you didn't have a migraine pill" The way you said it was so soft and silent that he turn to look at you with concern.

"Are you okay?" he walked over to a drawer of his desk and looked inside as he put on his glasses and looked at you on them.

"No, I feel like my head is exploding.

They were silent as he rummaged through the drawer. You saw how he picked up a box, opened it, and pulled a pill out of the wrapper.

"Here, it's Dexketoprofen, it'll help you better than an aspirin" You held out the palm of your hand and he placed it in it.

Without saying anything, he handed you a bottle of water.

"Thank you"

You were about to put it in your mouth when its voice interrupted you.

"Have you eaten anything yet?" he looked at you with a worried countenance.

"amm… No" you said sadly, watching as his left hand rummaged through his back pocket, he pulled out his wallet and spoke.

"I'll go get you something, sit down, you must have something in your stomach before you take it."

You sat in the olive green armchair waiting for him. It wasn't long before he walked in the door, you looked at him and his hands left some crackers and an orange on the table. You gawked at things.

"I'll make you a green tea, okay" his voice sounded calmer and softer.

You saw how he went straight to the hot water that he kept in a different coffee pot and poured the water into a cup, took the sack out of the wrapper and plunged it into the water.

You were too tired and sore to say anything. A little attention doesn't hurt.

You didn't know why he was being so helpful, you weren't his responsibility after all. You saw him worried about you, maybe he felt sorry that you were so bad, you felt that you smelled sick and that disgusted you. You felt embarrassed that he saw you like that, you felt so horrible that you didn't want anyone to see you, but he was helping you, being so helpful, you didn't know how that made him twice as attractive.

You saw him come to your side with a cup in his hand. You drank, ate, and took the pill he gave you to relieve the pain in your head.

You felt powerless, you felt weak. It was anything but funny, being locked up with him in his office, smelling of perfume, soap fresh out of the shower, and the essence of coffee, while you smelled of medicine, tea, sick person and vomit for sure.

While he was looking at you with those big brown eyes of his. Her lips parted trying to find words to make you feel better. He was as presentable as ever, his hair fresh and slicked back. The shower hadn't helped you much, it just gave you the power to come to school but you couldn't stand being in it anymore… Not even having set foot in the classroom.

"You need to be careful with alcohol," you looked at him and sighed heavily, "if you can't handle it, don't drink," this time it sounded more demanding.

"Well… You're no one to tell me how much to drink" you looked at him with crooked eyebrows "it's my responsibility"

He nodded, "I know you can be responsible, you're a big girl after all, aren't you?"

You just rolled your eyes back and snorted, drinking the last of the tea. You put the cup down on the coffee table and looked at it.

"Thank you for… This," you pointed to the leftovers in front of you.

"Anything for my favorite student" You looked at him a mocking smile appeared on his face, which made you let out a small laugh mocking sarcastically.

It was a challenge to be around him, he made you feel so small at times, so vulnerable, so loved and damn needy. And sometimes stupid.

You smiled shyly at him as you said goodbye. You got up and in doing so you got dizzy. He reflexively grabbed you by the waist and by your arm, you grabbed his shoulders for support. You closed your eyes and breathed trying to get back to your posture, when you opened them you saw him in front of you, close to you.

He looked at you worriedly, you're sure he asked you if you were okay, but you were gone, it was the closest you'd ever been. He looked at your face to see if you gave any signs, while your thoughts desired something else.

You thought this was your chance, maybe this was the right moment, maybe finding yourself sick in his office was meant to be. You could have thought twice but you didn't, it was now or never.

You looked him in the eye and looked at his lips. He was looking at you confused, maybe you were about to faint and he was still holding you up without doing anything else.

You felt so close to the moment when you felt a hot liquid from the back of your throat rise, burning your windpipe, vocal cords and reaching your roof of your mouth in a matter of seconds. You felt like it was an explosion that came out of your mouth, you didn't want to open your eyes, your gaze was down. Whatever came out of your mouth, it was all over him, his clothes, shoes… You could even feel it on your face, you could feel traces of it on the edges of your lips. But you prayed he wouldn't have a trace on his face. You swallowed hard and heard his voice.

"I think… You must take the pill again."

Fucking hell. Swallow me.

Thanks to Bard's artificial intelligence for giving me insight into the topics of physiological anthropology. we love imagining Joel teaching and being damn smart. Thank you for your support, it means a lot to me. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it, tell me what you thought and what you would like to see in this controversial "relationship".

[antifainternational]

Since youre antifascist, how about you give us a definition of fascism? What exactly makes someone a fascist? (and in case you use terms such as left-wing or right-wing be sure to define them too)

Guess it's been a while since a clever Anon challenged us to define fascism, huh? Right, let's get into it: Via the United States Holocaust Memorial Museum:

Yale professor Jason Stanley:

“Fascism is a creation of race hatred and its politically organized expression.” - Willhelm Reich, The Mass Psychology of Fascism (1933).

“Fascism is capitalism plus murder.” - Upton Sinclair

“Repression by brute force is always a confession of the inability to make use of the better weapons of the intellect — better because they alone give promise of final success. This is the fundamental error from which Fascism suffers and which will ultimately cause its downfall…that its foreign policy, based as it is on the avowed principle of force in international relations, cannot fail to give rise to an endless series of wars that must destroy all of modern civilization requires no further discussion. To maintain and further raise our present level of economic development, peace among nations must be assured. But they cannot live together in peace if the basic tenet of the ideology by which they are governed is the belief that one’s own nation can secure its place in the community of nations by force alone. ” - Ludwig von Mises,  Liberalism: A Socio-Economic Exposition (1927).

“Spent most of the day reading fascisti leaflets. They certainly have turned the whole country into an army. From cradle to grave one is cast in the mould of fascismo and there can be no escape … It is certainly a socialist experiment in that it destroys individuality. It destroys liberty.” -  Harold Nicolson, The Harold Nicolson Diaries : 1919-1964 (2004).

“The liberty of a democracy is not safe if the people tolerated the growth of private power to a point where it becomes stronger than the democratic state itself. That in its essence is fascism: ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or any controlling private power.” - Franklin D. Roosevelt

“A fascist is one whose lust for money or power is combined with such an intensity of intolerance toward those of other races, parties, classes, religions, cultures, regions or nations as to make him ruthless in his use of deceit or violence to attain his ends….If we define an American fascist as one who in case of conflict puts money and power ahead of human beings, then there are undoubtedly several million fascists in the United States.” - Henry A. Wallace

“Fascism is the cult of organised murder, invented by the arch-enemies of society. It tends to destroy civilization and revert man to his most barbarous state. Mussolini and Hitler might well be called the devils of an age, for they are playing hell with civilization.” - Marcus Garvey,  Authors take Sides on the Spanish War, 1937 Philosophy Tube's breakdown of the elements of fascism is very thorough and recommended if you're not the reading type. But do you read books? We hope so if you're looking to engage in political discussion about anything. Here are some books that tackle the definition of fascism, in whole or in part, that we would recommend to you (check/order from your local library!) Mark Bray's highly-accessible Antifa: The Anti-Fascist Handbook is a great starting point for this topic.

Columbia history professor Robert O. Paxton's excellent book The Anatomy of Fascism goes into this in great detail.

There's also Umberto Eco's The Eternal Fascist

or his "practical list for identifying fascists" as well as Hannah Arendt's seminal The Origins of Totalitarianism

We hope you weren't looking for a simple answer to the complex question of "what is fascism?" Anon, just as we hope you're up to taking our challenge of checking out all of the above so you're curiosity is satisfied and you're well-versed on the topic.

[astrosky33]

HOUSE MEANINGS IN ASTROLOGY

[READ] People often question why there’s so many meanings for each planet/house and the reason is so that you can learn more than just one thing about yourself through each placement. Otherwise astrology would be very vague and boring. These are all meanings that I’ve learned from my astrology classes at Kepler College

1ST HOUSE: identity/self, outward personality traits, outlook on life/approach to life, appearance, physical body, beauty, confidence, beginnings, how you initiate/ambition, your mannerisms, your outward behavior, physical fights, your presence, individuality, and passion

2ND HOUSE: money/finances (how we spend it, store it, and manage it), work, short term jobs, your work ethic, material possessions, self worth, values, emotional security, stability, financial security, how you meet financial obligations, your singing voice, giving/receiving, and resources (both material and non material)

3RD HOUSE: communication, your speaking voice/the way you talk, your mind, the way you think/your thinking skills, your perceptions, your opinions, your conscious mind, neighbors, siblings, interests, gossip, ideas/information, mathematics, literature, transportation (only ground not flying/air), local media, social media, cell phones, phone calls, visits, social activity, publishing, early education (before college), short trips, and short journeys

4TH HOUSE: homes/houses, family/family roots, your parents (particularly the mother/motherly figure), your inner child, emotions, foundations, your childhood, heredity, tradition, self-care, places of residence, real estate, properties, femininity, and conditions in early life

5TH HOUSE: children, childlike spirit, talent, creativity, drama, risk-taking, spotlight, romance (shows short term relationships, flings, hookups, and if long term relationships then only puppy love), hobbies, pleasures, objects of affection, vacations, games, speculation, fertility, concerts, festivals, and joy

6TH HOUSE: daily routine/day to day life/daily tasks, your health/fitness/the work you do on your body, your duties, self improvement, consistency, step-siblings, your hygiene, innocence, systems, service to others, co-workers, analytical nature, diets, animals, and your pets

7TH HOUSE: long term relationships, marriage, concern for others, attraction/attractiveness, charm, conflicts, partnerships, business partners, contracts, love affairs, open enemies, close associates, lower courts, negotiations, peers, agents, equality, harmony, and sharing

8TH HOUSE: major transformation, sex, death, longevity, changes, joint/shared finances, investments, stock market, your partners resources, taxes, inheritance, reproduction, seduction, intimacy (in general not only sexual), rebirth, merging, taboos, resurrection, loans, assets, secrets, mystery, businesses, spiritual transformation, magic (especially black magic), psychology, surgery/operations, trauma, periods, and the occult

9TH HOUSE: wisdom, law/laws, beliefs, religion, philosophy, higher education (college/university), viewpoints, languages, foreign environments, in-laws (your relatives through marriage), ethics, long journeys, travel, ideologies, higher courts, media, television, interviews, cross-cultural relations, grandparents, and learning

10TH HOUSE: your legacy, your career, your public image, your status, your reputation, fame, long-term goals, worldly attainment, sense of mission, responsibilities, recognition, authority, father/fatherly figure, experts, bosses, achievements, and professional aspirations

11TH HOUSE: friends, friend groups, gains, money made from career, desires, step/half parents, step/half children, uniqueness, inventions, technology, film, social awareness, influence, manifestations, hopes and wishes for the future, ideals, humanitarianism, associates (not just close ones), groups (in general), politics, social networking, where you make your debut into society, companions, allies, science, socialization/social interaction, clubs, organizations, and parties

12TH HOUSE: healing, the hidden, karma, karmic debts, old age, sleep, mental health, solitude/isolation, dreams (the ones you have when you sleep), hidden enemies, hidden causes, illusions, secret bed pleasures, spirituality, fears, losses, endings, escapism, impersonations, closure, need for withdrawal/privacy, afterlife, limiting beliefs, subsconcious memory, subconscious mind, hypnotism, self-undoing, hidden desires, the past, delay, and restrictions

MASTERLIST

MORE BEGINNER ASTROLOGY

PLANET MEANINGS

© 𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐬𝐤𝐲 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟑 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝

[kalinq0]

In honor of school starting again and me realising how much I actually fucked my life by enrolling in a gymnasium instead of a normal highschool, here is what subjects i think the yugos would teach if they worked in a gymnasium:

1. Serbia- Sports: Its in his blood to make future athlets and champions, good at every sport exept soccer and still preffers the kids playing it over any other. He pretends to be good at it and to like it, but he is terrible at it and hates the fact he is worse then croatia. Those kids will need to pay for therapy after each class from all of the verball abuse, also will break a couple of bones from Serbia forcing them to do the same practices he did in the military

2. Slovenia- Logistics: This subject apears in the last year and thats mostly why I picked it, he doesnt like most of the kids and finds them annoying, tho here he will change students every year so theres no need to pretend he likes them when he doesnt even remember them. He is the only somewhat mentaly stable in the balkans, and needs a break from constant fighting and wars

3. Macedonia- Sociology: This subject is only in the 3rd and 4th year, here the students learn about different cultures, social groups and social roles. Macedonia is the only country that peacefully left Yugoslavia and it has every possible ethnic group in the balkans. The only problem is economics is a verry important part of this class and she cant even teach it to herself let alone other kids

4. Montenegro- Religion(orthodoxy): Doesnt teach anything, either lets them go outside or goes to the church right next to the school. Doesnt even know whats he doing there, but he has several prayer ropes(brojanice) and a cross necklace so in his mind he is as religious as he can be. Most likely drinks/smokes the same second the class is over. He falls asleep while "teaching" regulary. Most likely in church aswell but somehow hid it.

5. Bosnia and Herzegovina- Ethics: Yes I think both of them would teach this. Here almost like in sociology, social dillemas, issues of identity and community and cultular customs are taught. They are the only merried couple in the balkans, would be a great example especially with Srpska living with them also

6. Croatia- Music arts: Croatia has some of the best musicians in the balkans, he listens to everything when it comes to music, likes to sing and plays the piano. Would teach them war criminal and nationalistic songs

7. Srpska- History: Emagine telling your students you are the reason ww1 happened, aswell as many other balkan wars. Would get fired the next day for multiple reasons. At first I wanted to give him geography but he would just fight with the kids the hole class

8. Vojvodina- Psychology: She is so underrated omg, shes the one that needs therapy after living with vuk, tho instead of that she teaches it to other kids to both try to heal them and herself. The kids love her tho, shes chill and would let them do anything if they dont want to listen

[menlove]

have to do a paper focusing on modern religion instead of religious/cultural history i have suffered more than jesus

[raptorladylover6969]

VERY passionate rant under the cut

“The Handler has dino DNA‼️” “The Handler is a robot‼️” “The Handler is a Brooklynn clone‼️” GET OUTTTTTTT GET TF OUTTTTTT I AM SO SICK OF THE SAME. GOD DAMN. DOG SHIT THEORIES. IM TIREDDDD OF IT. ITS THE SAME THING EVERY TIMEEEEEEEE AND I HATEEEEE IT. I WANT NEW THEORIES. ONES THAT ACTUALLY MAKE SENSE. ONES THAT ARENT THE SAME FUCKING THEME ALL OVER AGAIN UGHHHHH.

One thing I hate about Jurassic World youtube channels is when it comes to theorizing abt characters, THEY DONT KNOW HOW TO ACTUALLY AND PROPERLY ANALYZE. It’s like they never payed attention in english class 😭 esp when it comes to The Handler, because yes offence, just saying, their “character analysis” videos are absolute shit. I was yapping abt this early with @koi-fish-boy

What I mean is, instead of coming up with new theories, these “theorists” just take already existing theories, slap it into a video, add some other info that is not even considered a character analysis but just info thats RIGHT IN FRONT OF OUR FACES. The other worst part is, they never show any evidence to support their theories, they don’t make connections. They just go like “Oh The Handler blah blah creepy lady blah blah whats her deal? Blah oh shes probably part raptor or a clone blah blah blah k like and subscribe” GET OUT- 🗣️🗣️💥💥‼️‼️

I could debunk some of these theories right now even I am feeling THAT petty. “Brooklynn clone?” They don’t have the same facial structure, The Handler is 10x more paler, Brooklynn has a button nose while The Handler’s is straight, and have you taken into consideration that other blue eyed white ppl with freckles exist????? Brooklynn isnt the only white chick that exists 💀 “Dino x human hybrid?” this idea for a plot has been scrapped long ago. And even if she was a dino hybrid, she HAS to retain dino like features, like scales, vertical pupils, dino vocals, sharp teeth. NO, her having big eyes and pale skin DOES NOT = DINOSAUR FEATURES. Theres millions of people with big eyes and who are also sickly pale. “But she doesnt blink!” Yes tf she does I have the timestamps to prove it, she actually blinks A LOT considering the little screentime she has. “Robot??” We see her display humane emotions such as empathy in the final episode (I mean this theory itself has already been scrapped by countless ppl so 😼)

The problem here is that ppl dont reeeeealllllyyyy ANALYZE a character, they just observe the surface, find a couple of things here and there, and call it a day. They don’t use all of their senses when looking into a character, they only document what the naked eye can see. That is NOT what analyzation is about. Character analyzation is about digging DEEPER into the character, putting yourself in their POV, in their shoes, reading their facial expressions, their body language, spending hours playing back the same clips over and over again just to find new info, taking note of the dramatic lighting changes, the ambience, making connections, USING CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS TO UNBOX THE MYSTERYS OF SAID CHARACTER. Cmon guys did we learn nothing from Brooklynn??🤨🤨 like no joke me and @koi-fish-boy spent hours rewatching scenes with The Handler and found a BUNCH OF COOL NEW SHIT THAT NO ONE HASNT EVEN TALKED ABT YET.

People dont also seem to have enough balls to connect neuroscience to their theories, which is strange because incorporating psychology and the human brain, or any kind of science to a character analysis can rlly help with coming up with new theories. Why do you think MatPat’s theories were so good and interesting? It’s because he makes CONNECTIONS. He incorporates math, history, folklore, religion, and science into ALL OF HIS THEORIES. HE PUTS WORK INTO THEM. HE THINKS CRITICALLY.

All theories are valid, even the far-fetched ones, thats the whole point of a theory, its supposed to be crazy, but actually putting in the work to find evidence to support your theory WILL STRENGTHEN IT, and make it 100x more interesting. You can’t just introduce a theory without evidence to back it up, there needs to be at least 1 reason to even consider your theory plausible. Like the clone theory, I’m not entirely against it cuz cloning IS a thing in the JW universe, like that theory makes the most sense cuz its happened before, so why not again? I still think its absolutely crap, but I’ll admit, it makes sense. Why? Cause theres evidence to back it up.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk 🤗

[walkergirlsposts]

https://www.tumblr.com/walkergirlsposts/762623114300506112/the-way-misha-cant-ignore-criticism-what-a?source=share

Let's take a look at his work and school studies (if this site is accurate): https://spn-castiel.livejournal.com/321780.html

NPR Misha learned how to act in a wide variety of roles by taking a diverse group of jobs after high school. He landed a valuable internship with NPR.

An internship? So, he ran errands.

Misha was an intern with the Office of Presidential Personnel under President Bill Clinton.... While there, Misha spent most of his time writing letters to interns in governors’ offices.

Ah yes, writing letters to other interns is so important. Also, isn't this the same job someone mentioned Misha kept trying to reduce his hours because he was bored?

College Misha studied Social Theory at the University of Chicago. According to the departmental website, the program is concerned with subjects including "the theory of action, investigating theories of modernity, recovering classical theories of culture, exploring the role of time in social theory, theorizing the nature of religion, and articulating a dialogical approach to theory work." 

Doesn't seem like studying politics to me. Of course, it could be like those hellers who take Psych 101 and proclaim that they're studying Psychology. Let me guess, Misha took one political science class for his generals.

But of course, this is Misha so he'll say anything he can to claim he's this big political icon, when really, he's just in it for the attention and whatever fame it can bring.

Anyone who's not a heller knows he's only in it for the attention. This is all he has right now. His acting days are done.

[jessaerys]

i love thinking about death note rammys like the L backstory one-shot tells us he was a little feral demon that required constant enrichment to keep him from mayhem and destruction and violence and at age like seven he asked for a computer (asked for it, allegedly nobody planted the idea in him. we dont even have time to unpack that) and then fucking. cracked the stock market and thats why the wammy, uh, foundation, is so wealthy

and then when that gets boring he becomes a detective because solving crimes was better enrichment. like it's about that deep. and listen im not an L specialist i'm sure a lot more depth can be read into his character idk. i just got here. but regardless that's the reason he gives watari which poses the questions --

why, then, would he need a successor? who built the L legend, and what was the purpose? was it watari? did he want legacy? generational wealth? power? glory? why not stick with one weirdo golden ticket orphan and call it a day ?

why were they running this unbelievably unethical indoctrination program where they psychologically tortured orphans for years into believing being L's successor was the height of human achievement and the only meaning to their lives?

L looms so large and transcendental and godlike over mello's and near's entire existence (and we can extrapolate other children at wammys) to the point that it costs them both their life. mello's dead, near has been devoured by the role of L. and he was just some guy. literally some guy they heard a lot of stories about. they were basically raised to have intense chronic second child syndrome

anyway i know the reason is because death note was written basically by the seat of ohba's pants and none of this was considered (my favourite tidbit of information is that mello wouldnt have died if the artist had told him he was fun to draw) but i'm gonna steal it and run with it and elevate the text because that's some the secret history julien + the greek class shit. this is how religions get invented

[sophieinwonderland]

The word "tulpa" is used first by Alexandra-David Néel (Belgian-French buddhist anarchist) and phoneticized from "sprul-pa" (also rendered as "trulpa"). You can also trace the term back to sanskrit as "Nirmita".

The concept of an apparition is Buddhism can be attributed to aṣṭamāyopamā (sanskrit) or the 8 similes of illusion, which are basically metaphors for explaining how something can be perceived without it actually existing in the physical world. Apparitions (Nirmita) is the 8th simile.

She visited Lhasa in Tibet, a place which was inaccessible to foreigners at the time, and wrote the books "My Journey to Lhasa" and "Magic and Mystery in Tibet", where she explains what she learned in het journey. She then coined the term "tulpa", which spread to westerners of New Age practices as a type of thought-form.

Thought-forms in mysticism are attested by the book "Thought-Forms: A Record of Clairvoyant Investigation", which explains how many theosophists believe that thoughts are not simply a subjective thing that is confined in the human mind, but that they are "things" which have intrinsic properties. These thought-forms have principles (colour, form and clearness are determined by the type of thought) and classes (thought-forms can have certain forms which express the thought's inherent properties).

Tulpamancy today is not related to thought-forms.

Tulpamancy as it is today started, funnily enough, on 4chan - specifically in the paranormal board /x/ and subsequently the My Little Pony board /mlp/. Before that, the process of creating a tulpa was not known to people, and it generally involved ritualistic or metaphysical practices.

In /x/, some people began (in my opinion kind of haphazardly) making tulpas, and they reported their success. They then began writing guides which were freely shared in the community.

The real "explosion" in popularity started in the /mlp/ board, where topics of tulpamancy started popping up, which interested a lot of users. This snowballed into the creation of a forum ane a subreddit for the community (which were founded only after a Tulpamancy IRC was created, mostly made up of /x/ board users).

The approach to tulpamancy at this time was mostly psychological, instead of the previously metaphysical view of the practice.

The practice of tulpamancy and the practice of creating emanations are very different from each other, with the only similarity being the name (with "tulpa" only being a phoneticization of the tibetan term).

With the argument of cultural appropriation in the tulpamancy community, we need to first define what cultural appropriation is in the context of word usage.

Cultural appropriation in the context of word usage refers to the adoption or use of words from another culture without understanding or respecting their cultural significance, often resulting in the trivialization, misrepresentation, or exploitation of the originating culture.

Is the usage of the word "tulpa" mocking the original practice? Not really I don't think. The word "tulpa", while it was coined by a buddhist is generally not used when referring to emanations. (What I am about to say is personal experience, keep that in mind) Most buddhists I have spoken to at most will have a fear of non-buddhist practices and ideas being wrongfully thought of as being buddhist, which may have been a problem in the past when tulpamancy was indeed though of as a buddhist practice, but now the community fully separates itself from any religion or spiritual practice.

Here's a link to a post on /r/Tulpas on reddit from a Tibetan Buddhist with an emanation:

https://www.reddit.com/r/Tulpas/comments/unt6h7/i_am_a_tibetan_buddhist_with_an_emanation_tulpa/

---

What do you think about this, Sophie? I found it as a kind of copypasta to explain how tulpamancy is not cultural appropriation.

It's a pretty good overview! 😁

Appropriation topics are always tricky, but to me this conversation comes down to two question. The first is if the original tulpa from Alexandra David-Neel was appropriative. In my opinion, while it may have veered away from the Tibetan sprul-pa in some ways, it was created by a Buddhist convert with the aid of Tibetan translators like Lama Kazi Dawa Samdup. For this reason, the original ADN tulpa is generally considered more a result of cultural exchange.

I do think treating the ADN tulpa as an authentic Buddhist practice might be harmful, but it would be unfair to say it was made without regard to the original culture. (I would also say that it's hard to judge how much of this was indeed an authentic Tibetan Buddhist practice or not. Most people who have said it isn't are looking at current Buddhist practices 100 years later after an invasion by China destroyed many religious texts and records and heavily suppressed the religion.)

The second question is if modern versions of the tulpa are appropriative. And I don't consider this to be the case. Modern tulpamancy, while born from ADN tulpa, mostly just uses the words and general concept. As you say, the big problem within Buddhist circles is certain practices being falsely presented as Buddhist, muddying the waters. Over the last decade, the tulpamancy community has made a strong effort in distancing themselves from Tibetan Buddhism and tulpa's etymology.

...

Here's the direct link to the Reddit post from the Tibetan Buddhist with the emanation:

[pleaseeeimjustagirl]

🎀30 Day Glow Up Challenge 🎀 - day four

♡ Mindset : I got a 69 on my math test which I am very happy about lol as someone who has always been terribleee at math. I almost got a 70!!! My goal for my third exam is to try and get a 80 or higher. In my reading today I chose to read “The Power Of One More” the author talks about self confidence and how it coincides with self trust and how when we don’t trust ourselves to stay committed and we constantly break our promises to ourselves it can affect our self confidence. He says that self confidence has nothing to do with doing away with shyness it’s about moving forwards with plans regardless because of the promise you made with yourself. I loved this chapter so much I agree with this. I have struggled with discipline and when I did it messed with my self confidence.

♡ Health : Today I had Playa Bowl for the first time it was so goodddd. I will be going back for more. I got the Mucho Mango Bowl I def recommend I wanted to get the Nutella option but I didn’t next time I go I will get that bowl. Today I walked around a lot I went on my step tracking app and found out that for the past two days I've been so close to achieving 5K steps.

♡ Self Care : Today I treated myself to Playa Bowl because I passed my exam and I booked my spa day for next week I'm super exciteddd for that. I have been really kind with myself treating myself like a baby and pampering myself. My period is coming and I know that my emotions will be all over the place soon so I am being a little more gentle with myself and what thoughts I allow to sit my in my mind when negative thoughts come I immediately push them away with two or more positive thoughts.

♡ Experience : I’ve interacted with two people in my class it was very nice we talked about religion and spirituality a couple of days ago and it was very nice conversation even though we all come from different beliefs. Today I spoke to one of them about my opinion on my Psychology paper topic and theirs. I have seen a big shift in my confidence, mental health, and social life this semester and it is so beautiful its all the work I have been doing on myself and I'm proud of myself honestly.

Tell me how you’re doing babes I would love to know my inbox and requests are open<33333