#that's a bit of a fucking can of worms i am not fucking opening ok?

[the-acid-pear]

Deltarune Theory: Spamton, The Player & Freedom

As some of you might know by my occassional ramblings and the fact that i post 10 pics of the guy per day bc of my 100+ queue I've been a little unwell about Spamton and Deltarune as a whole lately, and recently while trying to ramble about a different topic I realized something:

I think we, the player, the soul, are a bigger part of this game that we are giving credit for.

After all, what are some of the main themes of Deltarune? Lack of freedom, lack of control, how your choices don't matter... And if we look on a smaller scale, if we look at characters like Kris and Spamton you can also add to the mix a certain level of disconnect with your own body, but maybe i'm going too off topic there... (maybe?)

This is to say, don't you think these things apply quite well to the soul, to us, too? Sure, we control Kris, but Kris is free of ripping us out temporarily and often adds their own input to the things we ask them to say (and even says things on their own), not to mention how they get around to avoid doing what we asked or avoid revealing certain information to us.

On top of that, there's our vessel. The body we were meant to have and freely use, that was, in theory, discarded. And i think this is very imporant because many pick up on Kris being trapped with us, but not as much on us being trapped with KRIS. What we have is an uneassy alliance, a sort of symbiotic relationship, we need one another to exist. But we still aren't free.

And this is where Spamton comes in, our EV3RY BUDDY 'S FAVORITE [[Number 1 Rated Salesman1997]] and number 1 freedom yearning puppet, who offers us the highly valued [Hyperlink Blocked] which he believes will carry one to freedom and such.

And it is true that freedom is something Kris might want, but don't forget Kris isn't the only one in control of their body. We too are the ones going straight back to that salesman and doing his little quest.

And this is even more true in the Weird Route, the route where we strip all control from Kris AND Noelle to the point she can only hear us talking, and it's the route where Spamton says at the end "IT’S YOU AND THAT [Hochi Mama]! YOU’VE BEEN [making], HAVEN’T YOU! YOU’VE BEEN MAKING [Hyperlink Blocked]!".

And if you, like me, believe the meaning of [Hyperlink Blocked] is LOVE, then this would make a lot of sense, after all, what were some of the biggest complaints people had about chapter 1 when it released?

Lack of multiple routes, namely a genocide one, and lack of control.

And Toby Fox, being the monkey paw ass guy he is, obligued to the fans request. You want control? You want murder? Okay, there you go.

Not only that, but the weird route is the only one where Spamton never learns Kris' name, only called them kid, making the fact that Kris has nothing to do with our insane rampage even more explicit.

And on top of everything, Spamton was right. We did in fact gain control and a certain level of freedom thanks to this, our choices, the player choices, now REALLY mattered. And the consequences were devastating, hell, even Spamton died here.

So, with all this said, I think my point has become clear. I think our role in the story is very significant, and it even perfectly ties with the themes and the existing characters.

Very excited to see this develop further as more chapters come out 😁

[lostonehero]

Tma x mechs

Jonny archivist baby

"Is there a reason you're in my office, Sasha?" Jonny looked up from the statement on his desk.

"I've figured it out." Sasha smirks.

Jonny raised a brow. "Figured out what?"

"Why you suddenly became a dick after the promotion." Sasha hums. "You've fallen hard for Tim and Martin and me, but I'm aromantic, so sorry about that, bud. You're trying to cover your tracks by being a dick and pretending you hate everyone."

Jonny scoffs. "Of course not. I'm perfectly being just here as me and.... have you noticed Martin has a spider collection above his desk?" Jonny sighs. It's only been a few decades. How has he gotten so shit at lying?

Sasha raised a brow. "Jon, come off it." She crosses her arms as Jon sighs. "I'm sure if you talked to them they would be on board."

You're mortal all of you. Is what Jonny wanted to shout, but he couldn't. Even with the metal heart, he was falling hard and fast, weird horror be damned. Maybe he could use the weird horrors to keep them around long. He groans. "You have to be included aromantic or not. You're going to be a part of it, even if it's just sex."

"I'm sure I could arrange something." Sasha finishes her text, and there's a shout from Tim outside Jon's office.

"BLOODY KNEW IT." Tim shouts.

Jonny covers his face. He was screwed.

......

It's only been three weeks since they tried out the dating thing. He can only recall one other time truly where he was in love, and that was with Tim, not Stoker, but Gunpowder. It didn't end well. They remained friends, but it hurt. Tim blamed him for his eyes, but Carmillia was already dead to their knowledge, and they didn't mean to find him. They tried again a few times, but it was never the same, and everything it just hurt him more. DTTM was the final straw that broke the camels back. He's happier now than he has been for a long time. His crew probably doesn't even care that he's gone.

"Jon?" Martin's soft voice broke him away from the self hatred. "Jon, are you ok?"

Tim hugged Jonny's arm. "What ya thinking about, boss man?"

"We are literally in bed together. Don't call me that." Jonny sighs. "My ex, his name was also Tim. We became friends after but it was never the same yaknow. We were a part of this group like a family. I had a really bad falling out with them. That's how I ended up here." He sighs. "I'm not good at being open."

Martin sighs and moves Jon to his chest. "You feel like with us, you're betraying what you once had."

Tim nods. "Well, I'll be a better Tim." He hums softly. "You still have your memories even if they aren't great."

Jonny tries to hide his face in Martin's chest. "Enough! You're making me soft."

"That's the only thing soft about you. You're way too thin." Tim chuckles.

Jonny whines as Martin traps him in a soft hug. "Stop. I am a vicious man."

Tim smiles, joining the hug. "Mmh, yes, you're so scary."

"Yes, you make the statements come alive. Even if toy think they're fake." Martin smiles.

Jonny was absolutely fucked. He had to figure out how to keep them alive, and he'll be damned if Carmillia got involved. That bitch better stay the fuck away from here. She better be dead.

.......

It took a year for everything to go to shit. A fucking year. Jonny sat in the empty archives. It started when Sasha got bit by a moth of all things. He didn't think moths had mouths. Then she got sick. Elias was being a dick about it, and soon she was coughing up worms and talking about music she could only hear. She disappeared after that, claiming she was sick and he hadn't heard anything.

Next was Tim. He started to get sick and pale, claimed the light hurt. He wore long sleeves and sunglasses inside, but he didn't change mentally he just... physically, he was changing, and he tried to help, but one day, they were walking, and a cars shadow passed by, and he vanished. He mourned with Martin.

Last was Martin he helped get to the bottom of things. These fear gods were changing his loves, but they were supposed to have a choice. He rubbed his burned hand. Martin went to hill top road and didn't come back.

He should have known better. He can't just play pretend like he was some mortal. He wasn't even human. He could feel something wet drip down his cheeks. He was crying so much lately he was fucking pathetic.

A soft knock on the door made Jonny rub his face and sit up. "What is it?"

"Sup boss man." It was Tim he had sharper teeth, and his eyes were pitch black, but it was him.

"T-Tim?" Jonny shot up out of his seat.

"Yeah, it's me." Tim rubs his arm. "I can promise you I didn't want this. I've become some sort of monster, and you deserve to -" he gasps as Jonny knocks him to the floor in a hug.

"Fuck that, monster or not I still love you." Jonny freezes he never spoke those words since....

Tim pulls Jonny into a kiss. "Are you sure?"

Jonny nods. "You have to help me find Martin and Sasha now. Im a monster, too, I think. I got this weird knowing thing. Elias won't tell me anything, but I know he knows more than he lets on. We I know about the fears, and you've become an avatar. So what? I don't care."

"Jon, I could kill you." Tim still wraps his arms around Jonny."

"And?" Jonny scoffs. "A lot can kill me. it doesn't mean it will stick."

"What?" Tim blinks.

"I'll explain later." Jonny gets up, grabbing Tim's hand. "We have to find Martin."

"Jo-Jon, wait." Tim can't really stop as he's pulled along.

It wasn't hard to find Sasha next her apartment complex was condemned due to infestation. It also took no effort to break into.

"Tell me again why you know how to pick locks?" Tim sighs.

"Immortal space pirate, Tim please keep up." Jonny smirks as the door opens.

"Just because you survived being dragged through the dark doesn't mean I believe you." Tim pinched his brow as worms splattered Jonny, and soon enough, he exploded in worms, leaving a metal heart on the floor and a half eaten corpse. "Jesus fucking christ."

"Don't you hear.... oh hi Tim." Sasha waves as she makes her way across the room. "Seems you've been busy following a different song."

"I didn't have a choice in the manner." Tim frowns, staring down at Jon. He pauses, and his eyes widen, and he jumps back.

Jonny suddenly sits up as his skin knits back together. He now has ears that flare out like a cow and horns. His teeth are sharp he has claws and a long tail. "Ok, the first time I died like that."

Sasha blinks, and the swarm pulls away from Jon. "I'm sorry my brood ate you, and you exploded. Not that I'm mad, but how?"

"Immortal space pirate." Tim and Jonny say at the same time.

Jonny brushes himself off. "Aw shit my disguise failed. Anyway, do you know where Martin is? I'm pretty sure you guys aren't fired, and I'm in love, and I'm not giving up just because you're weird horror creatures. I've fucked weirder."

"I have so many questions." Sasha pursed her lips. "Let me get dressed, and I'll help you look."

"I also have questions." Tim pauses for a moment. "I love you too."

.......

A woman answered the door at hill top road. "Archivist."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, where's Martin?" Jonny crossed his arms.

"Oh, dear archivist mother has plans for him."

"Ew." Jonny scoffs pushing past the woman. "Martin! I don't care what weird creature you've become. I'm not human, so it will be fine."

A confused response from Martin. "I.... what?"

"Martin!" Jonny runs towards the voice, getting caught in a web. "Fuck."

"Hello Annabelle." Sasha waves at the door she looks almost normal minus the moths fluttering around her.

"Mother doesn't want him dead." Annabelle pauses. "What is he hoping to accomplish?"

"True love." Tim dramatically swoons under his umbrella.

"We also warned him not to just run into here but as you can see." Sasha vaguely motions.

"FUCK!" Martin shouts. "WHAT THE FUCK JON?"

"What you act as if this is the first time I've knawed off a limb to get out of something. See, look, it's already growing back." Jonny motions to his newly reformed arm. "Also spider centaur is pretty hot."

Martin pulls Jonny up and kisses him roughly. "You are the weirdest man I've ever met."

"Technically, not a human man." Jonny snickers.

......

Elias was about to pull his hair out. He had no idea how his new archivist had gotten his assistants back after they turned into avatars. It's actually impressive, but since one of them is now the web, he can no longer spy on his archivist. The hats were new, but he couldn't understand why Jon insisted that it's his new thing. It's the middle of summer. He does not need to wear winter hats.

.......

Nastya had returned to the Aurora too much fanfare, and it only took a day for her to ask where Jonny was. She stared at Tim, who crossed his arms. "So?"

Tim sighs. "After we realized we're yaknow truly immortal. He took it the worst and didn't accept it like the rest of us, and he left. Stole a ship and a bunch of shit, but he's been gone for 100 years. Lyf took his position as lead singer, but we have been looking for him."

"We don't have a way to track him." Brian adds. His metal body has been changing to reflect how he looked before the mechanisms. He was very quiet about it, but it was extremely noticeable. His top hat covered his fox like ears. "We all want him back. We found you by accident looking for him."

Nastya frowns. "He's gone?"

Tim frowns and looks away. "He didn't even take the metal box he keeps under his bed."

"Bullshit." Nastya touches the wall. "Aurora, track the ship Jonny stole. I'm getting my brother back. You're going to apologize." She points to Tim. "He's our captain."

Tim nods. "I fucked up."

.....

"Man, you human holidays are fun." Jonny's tail flicked happily behind him. The Magnus Institute was throwing a massive festival for Halloween. Elias was taking statements he insisted on that. "Didn't have anything like this on my astroid."

Martin followed behind with normal legs but 8 eyes and three pairs of arms. "Well , we will remedy that."

Tim seems to have hair that floated like rising darkness. His eyes were pitch black, and his mouth was full of sharp teeth. He was wearing a shirt. Jonny made him say the better Tim. "Martin, I think he likes it for the amount of sweets he's able to get."

Jonny scoffs. "I like the costumes."

"You're not even dressed up." Sasha raised a brow. "You said that was your normal outfit in space."

"Well, yeah, but it's not normal here, and humans don't have ears teeth or a tail like mine." Jonny huffs.

"Point taken." Martin chuckles. "Oh, looks like Elias got a band to play for the festival."

"It's not a band it's an open mic. A feast of stage fright." Jonny hums. "I'll perform something."

"Spoiling us?" Tim purrs.

"Yes, always." Jonny gasps as Martin picks him up.

"You're a hopeless romantic for someone who has lived as long as you and claims to be just as bitter." Martin smiles.

"Only for you guys." Jonny kisses the right side of Martin's mandible. "We could just skip this and have fun in the bedroom."

"Horndog." Tim chuckles. "How about after we hear you sing song bird?"

"Tim's right." Martin's gaze darkens. "You have to both earn it."

Jonny shudders. "Yes, sir."

Tim nods eagerly.

.......

"Impressive costumes." A cheery soft voice came from a tall, muscular sailor captain.

Lyf blinks. "Um, hello."

"Costume?" TS tilts their head.

"I didn't think Nikola would change for Halloween." A man wrapped around the sailors arm.

"Um, right...." Lyf sighs. "Um, could you help us? We're looking for a man going by Jonathan Sims." He hopes Nastya was right in the fake name Jonny chose.

"You're looking for my archivist?" The man's eyes flash green.

Lyf's eyes flashed rainbow. "I'm sorry. Did you say archivist?"

"Correct. I'm Elias Bouchard. This is a nice Halloween festival for my insistute. Jon is with his partners traversing the festive scene." He gives a sinister smile. "I highly suggest the activities while you look."

"That Sounds Like Jolly Good Fun." TS drags Lyf into the festival grounds.

"W-wait, TS!" Lyf groans he had more questions to ask.

......

Inspector: At the Halloween festival with TS. It's being thrown by the Magnus Institute. TS has prevented me from asking more questions to the head of said institute. However, Jonny might be the head archivist.

Archivist: There is a 100% that's bullshit.

Fire Fire: that's a good joke kid

GP: there's a open mic here to perform.

TS: I Made A New Friend.

There's a picture of TS next to a mannequin who seemed nervous in clown makeup. There appears to be human skin stretched tightly around the plastic body.

TS: This Is Nikola.

Inspector: Tim why the fuck didn't you warn us about earth?

GP: What the fuck are you talking about

GP: TS what the fuck.

Drumbot: I am with Nastya. We have found a meat themed activity. I agree with Lyf. This doesn't seem very human. However my phone will be taken for this so I will talk later.

GP: meat?

GP: Brian?

Doctor: I am going to the mushroom tent! Lyf invitation open to join. I think they will enjoy the fact I am poisonous.

Inspector: Marius we still haven't figured out what you are.

Science officer: Not for a lack of trying. Anyway, I'm going to find that meat tent.

Fire Fire: there's a woman named Jude Perry and she's all about Fire I'm going to find her.

Nastya: They did not let me in with Brian. However, they did give me some sort of meat on a stick. Jonny would love this.

GP: ill play my song. If he's here, he'll come to watch right?

Nastya: I will join you.

.......

Brian stumbled out of the tent. His throat hurt from screaming. He stopped in his tracks and when he looked down at his hands and saw flesh. He blinks and continues to stare. He could feel more so than he did before. He could hear the heart in his chest. He can feel his fox ears twitch under his hat. He could feel his tail. When did he get a tail? He always had one before...

A man bumped into him. "Oh shit sorry man." The man paused, tilting his head. "You ok?"

Brian stared at the man, and it was Jonny. He had glasses on and his normal outfit. "I uh...." He could feel everything, and he was getting overwhelmed. "I think... I." He felt Jonny grab his arm.

"Come on, you look like you're about to pass out." Jonny says softly, leading him to a table where three other people are already sitting down. "Hey, I know promised snacks, but we'll he looks like he's about to panic." He sits the man down who stares down at his hands.

Brian blinks as a bottle of water is put in his hands. He can't eat or drink. Why was this... he unscrewed the cap and drained the contents. Something wet dripped down his cheeks. A soft warm had patted his back, and Jonny sat to his left.

"Hey, are you ok?" A soft voice came from Brian's right. A man with eight eyes and a spider mandible gives a soft smile. He hands over half of a sandwich. "I know the tents can be much for anyone."

"Because avatars run them." The man with shadow like hair sighs. He hands Brian a few tissues. "It's impossible to stop others from being dragged inside."

Brian nibbled on the sandwich. It's been millions of years since he ate anything since he could taste. He couldn't even feel the metal in him, but he knew it was still there. It was changed and he couldn't understand, but this was the best meal he had ever had.

"So what's your costume? It seems very realistic." Jonny smiles.

Brian swallows and wipes his face. It was still so overwhelming, but he could handle it. He pulls off his hat to reveal two fluffy fox ears.

"Oh, let me guess! A foxy magician!" The woman chuckles as moths flutter around her.

"No, he's obviously an animal tamer turned animal." The man nudged her and they both giggle.

"He could just be a furry." Jonny wiggles his brows and the table erupts into laughter.

Brian can't help but laugh along.

"Wait, I have one he's a musician." The spider man smiles.

Brian giggles and nods. "Correct!"

"I'm an ex musician." Jonny smirks.

"No, you're not. You take every chance to perform." The man throws a crumple piece of paper at him.

"Ok, fine, I'm a part-time musician and full-time archivist." Jonny smiles. "Ah, right, let me introduce everyone. The man in the better Tim shirt is Tim, the lovely lady with the various moths is Sasha, and the spider guy is Martin. I'm Jon, the archivist of this insistute, currently dating the two handsome gentlemen, and fucking Sasha because she's happily aromantic."

Sasha salutes.

Martin waves, and Brian notices he has three pairs of arms.

Tim throws finger guns. "You're free to join us. Jon's got a sweet tooth, and double boss man got some American sweets for a few booths."

Jonny nods and gets up. "He's an honorary assistant for the day then."

"You probably shouldn't say that, Elias might actually hire him." Martin chuckles.

"To be fair, he hired you." Sasha winks getting up.

Martin chuckles, holding one hand out to Brian. "Come on, we'll help you navigate this place."

Brian realizes Jonny doesn't recognize him. Which makes sense if he wasn't metal anymore. He also left before his body started to change to reflect what he looked like before mechanisms. He sighs and nods. Might as well see what has happened to Jonny.

"I'll lead the way!" Jonny hops up.

"Eye eye boss man." Tim chuckles.

Jonny rolls his eyes. "We are literally together. Don't call me that."

"Fine, sorry, cowboy." Tim smirks as Jonny blushes.

"... go back to boss man." Jonny says with a deep blush on his features.

.......

Drumbot has changed his name to Brian

Brian sent a photo

It's a picture of Jonny between two men looking happy. Both men are kissing either cheek, and he has a sign that says little cowboy and his partners.

Brian: Jonny doesn't recognize me, but I also don't recognize me.

GP: I'm sorry, but Jonny got hitched!

Nastya: He's wearing wedding bands? Isn't that a human custom?

GP: Brian, what switch are you on

Brian: None

Archivist: impossible

Brian sends another picture

It seems to be a selfie. He has grayish goldish skin, soft, long hair, and big fox ears. He doesn't appear to be made of metal anymore.

Brian: The meat tent was actually a guise for a Flesh god.

GP: this literally can't be earth

Doctor: I think I accidently poisoned the nice mushroom man.

Lyf: I need to bleach my eyes.

Fire Fire: I think I believe Brian becoming flesh again over Jonny getting hitched

Archivist: this is all highly unlikely scenarios

Science officer: I am grabbing you Brian.

TS: My New Friend Stole My Arm Then Screamed When It Reattached

Lyf: I'll get TS from causing a panic.

Doctor: Wait let me come with you my love.

Lyf: not until you bathe in a bath of bleach

Doctor: only for you.

GP: I'm going to rip my eyes out.

........

"Brian!" A woman swoops down mechanical wings spread out as she grabs Brian's shoulder. "It even feels like flesh."

"Ah." Martin pauses. "So, is this a former crew member?"

"Yup." Jonny hums and sips on his bright orange drink.

"So how many are there, like 9?" Tim raised a brow.

"Well, Nastya left, but Lyf joined, and Aurora can be considered a mech as well." Jonny shrugs.

"Isn't Brian supposed to be metal?" Sasha nudges Jonny.

"You know that explains what he looks so familair and yeah he is supposed to be metal." Jonny shrugs again, watching Raphaella poke and prode Brian.

"No wonder why he had a panic attack." Tim hums. "I probably would too if I went from metal to flesh."

"Jonny...?" A Russian accent caught Jonny's attention.

"Nastya?" Jonny smiles. "It's been a while and it's nice to see you."

"What happened to you?" Nastya stops right in front of Jonny.

"Therapy mostly, got hitched, and git a degree, became archivist, and just enjoying life with weird horror gods. What's up with you? It's pretty fucked up that you broke up with Aurora because she changed physically but not mentally."

Nastya blinks and opens her mouth, but Jonny cuts her off.

"Yaknow, I spent decades helping her through the breakup and losing my sister." Jonny sips his drink obnoxiously. "Eh, I'm mostly over it, Marius was right. Therapy does help. Anyway, congrats on rejoining the mechs or whatever you're doing."

Raphealla and Brian have both stopped and stared at Jonny.

Brian takes a breath. "I think my ears are malfunctioning."

"No, I heard that too." Raphaella blinks.

Nastya stared stunned at Jonny.

"Have a fun time and stay away from the tents, you'll get pretty fucked up in you go into them, and not in the fun way." Jonny gets scooped up by Martin.

"I think that was very emotionally grown of you." Martin smiles.

"Does this mean the other Tim is here? Oh fuck yeah I'm going to fuck with him." Tim runs off and jumps into a shadow.

"Follow him!" Jonny climbs to Martin's shoulders. "This is going to fucking confuse Elias to no end."

Martin chuckles. "With pleasure."

[prettyyoungandbored]

The Test - Johnny Knoxville

Pairing: Johnny Knoxville x Fem!Reader (goes by “Babydoll”)

Author’s Note: I needed to get this one out because the next story I’ve had in my drafts for MONTHS and she needs to be seen!

NOT MY GIF

Y/N paced around her office when she heard the door open. Whitney entered, closing the door behind her with one hand while the other held onto a plastic bag.

“Special delivery,” Whitney beamed, handing over the bag.

“You’re an angel,” Y/N sighed, reaching into the bag. She paused for a moment, and then pulled out a bag of gummies.

“Those are mine,” Whitney said, grabbing the bag. “The rest is yours.”

Y/N grabbed the can of Arizona tea and began chugging it.

“Are you really that dehydrated?” Whitney remarked.

Y/N shot her a look. “Well I need to be able to pee, Whit.”

“Ok, but you don’t have water to - you know what? Not my problem. Drink up.”

Y/N continued chugging as her best friend watched while lying on the couch.

“So you’re doing this life changing event while your husband is at a meeting?” Whitney asked, putting a gummy worm in her mouth.

���Honestly, I just got the idea this morning,” Y/N admitted. “Like, I got it and then I called you and here we are.”

Whitney nodded her head. “I love that even though you’re married, you still go to me first for all your impromptu decisions.”

“Oh you always knew you would be my go-to regardless.”

Whitney hummed in delight as she threw another gummy worm in her mouth. “So what do we do now?”

“We wait until I have to pee,” Y/N said, leaning back against her desk.

“Ok, so while we’re waiting, you wanna tell me what you’re feeling right now?”

Y/N sighed. “I have, like, million thoughts going through my mind right now.”

“Want to talk about one-.”

“I’m fucking terrified.”

“Ok good. Let’s focus on that one.” Whitney sat up straight. “It’s ok to be scared-.”

“I said ‘terrified’ not scared.”

“Terrified, scared. Potato, pohtatoh.”

“No, scared is liked I don’t want anything to do with it, period,” Y/N said. “Terrified is like the idea of it makes my skin crawl.”

“That’s not-ok,” Whitney gave up. “Look, what are. You terrified of? Do you not want kids or-?”

Just then, the door opened and Johnny strolled in.

“Hey Whitney!” he greeted with a big smile.

“Hey! Look who it is!” Whitney said. “I’m gonna leave you two kids alone for a bit and make a phone call.”

She grabbed her purse and patted Johnny on the shoulder.

He turned to Y/N and placed his hands on her hips. “Everything ok, Babydoll?”

Y/N sighed, leaning her forehead against his. “Please don’t be mad.”

Johnny pouted. “What’s up?”

“Ok, so you know I haven’t been feeling well, right?”Y/N began.

Johnny nodded when his eyes widened. “Are you…?”

“I don’t know, but I’m taking a test. How do you feel about that?”

Johnny thought for a moment before asking, “Can I come in the bathroom with you?”

==================================

“Now, we wait,” she said, setting the test on the counter top.

Y/N and Johnny sat in the bathroom, their backs against the wall. Johnny rubbed his wife’s bare thigh, giving it an occasional squeeze.

“I chose a good day to wear a dress,” she spoke up.

Johnny cracked a smile. “I do like when you wear them. Easy access for me.”

She shot him a look, pulling back her lips. “You would.”

“You don’t fight me on it, Cutie.”

She sighed, leaning her head against his shoulder. “How are you feeling about possibly being a dad?”

“I would love to have kids,” he said. “And having kids with you? Dream come true. Technically, we’re parents to the Jackass gang. Although, I’m more of the mother and you take on the dad role.”

She chuckled as Johnny turned to her. “At the end of the day, kids is a partnership thing. If you’re not ready, we can wait until you are.”

“I am,” she said, feeling the weight of the situation lift off her body. “I’m just scared, you know? I mean, what if I’m a terrible mom?”

“You? Not a chance.”

“You don’t know that.”

“I do. You would be the best mother in the whole goddamn world.”

She opened her mouth to respond when she remembered something. She threw her head back against the wall. “Shit!”

“What? What is it?” Johnny asked, turning his body to face her.

“The meeting today. You got the role in ‘Dukes of Hazzard’, didn’t you?”

“Yeah but-.”

“But I’ll be pregnant while you’re filming.”

He shrugged. “So you come with me.”

“Come with you? It’s not filming in LA?”

“Nope. Louisiana. Two months beginning in February.”

Two months didn’t sound terrible. “But still, what about appointments? What am I gonna do while you’re filming? I don’t want to burden you, babe. You should be having fun.”

“I won’t be if I’m constantly worrying about you being thousands of miles away from me,” he said. “Look, if you end up getting pregnant, you can come with me. You can work from the trailer or from the hotel. We’ll get a temporary doctor to check in on you. We’ll…”

As he listed out all the things he would do, Y/N realized how lucky she was to have Johnny as a partner. When she saw obstacles, he saw ways to overcome them together.

Parenting would be hard, but with Johnny it would be worth it. That kid would have two parents doing everything and anything for them.

“All I know this that I don’t want to miss a single moment of you growing our kid,” he concluded. “I want to be there for everything.”

“Ok,” she said, taking his hand. “I’ll go with you.”

His eyes lit up. “Yeah?”

“As long as you can handle the good and the bad that comes with pregnancy,” she said.

“Babydoll, you know I can handle anything,” he said.

He gave her a kiss when his watch went off. “It’s time to check. You ready?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

Johnny helped her off the ground and Y/N grabbed the stick from the bathroom counter. She stared down at it as Johnny watched on bated breath.

“PJ…”

Her lack of a reaction made him sick to his stomach. “What? What’d it say?”

He looked at the stick and then back at her, tears streaming down.

=================================

Whitney laid on the office couch when Y/N and Johnny walked in. The red head shot up, smoothing out her jeans.

“What’s the verdict?” Whitney asked.

The couple exchanged a look, smiled growing on their faces.

“I’m pregnant,” Y/N said with a small laugh.

Whitney screamed before throwing her arms around Y/N. “I’m so happy for you two!” she exclaimed, squeezing her best friend.

She then moved to Johnny, giving him a big hug. When she pulled back, Y/N noticed tears pouring down her best friend’s face.

“Are you…Whitney you’re…” Y/N couldn’t believe it.

“I never thought it was possible,” Johnny remarked, shaking his head.

“Shut up, this is a special day,” she sniffled. “My best friend is having a baby.”

She grabbed a tissue off of Y/N’s desk and blew her nose.

Y/N and Johnny exchanged smiles. Not only did they get the best news ever, but they made Whitney cry.

[teenage-mutant-ninja-freak]

Tarot readings with the lads!

Leo

You've somehow convinced him to let you do a tarot reading for him

you're still not sure how, maybe the mixture of puppy dog eyes and veiled threats combined?

anyways, you ask him what question he has

"I want to know how to be a better leader"

but that isn't *fun* so you pick a different one for him

you shuffle the cards with your intention of "What is Leo lacking that he should focus on more right now?"

you pull out the 6 of cups

Leo looks at you like "Is that good?"

you explain the card

"You see the way they're handing the cup to a child? This card is all about revisiting the past, childhood memories and innocence. It's about simple joys and pleasures also cups represents the element of water, to be free flowing and not so confined"

"And this helps me be a better leader how...?"

you smile and tell him that's not what you asked

"Leo, the cards are telling you to relax a little, spend some time with yourself and not so much worrying about the fate of the world. Be present, find that child in you who wants to do dumb, fun shit!"

he doesn't say anything but he thinks on it

"Anyway the next card was temperance so that's basically saying if you don't listen to me you're never gonna find balance...."

Raph

Yeah there was no way he was going to let you do a reading

you had to trick him into sitting down but once he saw the cards he tried to leave

you swayed him and his only request was "Just don't ask when I'm gonna die or some shit, ok?"

instead you do a reality check for him and you pull out 3 cards

The star, 4 of swords and 5 of wands reversed

"oh, baby.." you start

he's so worried

frantically asking what any of that means, so you break it down for him

"the star's message is: have faith. Hope, faith and purpose basically. You need to understand that you're doing alright, no matter how much you beat yourself up. 4 of swords is about rest and relaxation, taking a break. You work yourself too hard out on patrol, then come back here and hit the gym, then you barely sleep and do it all over again. You;re burning yourself out. Finally, 5 of wands. Reversed it talks about inner conflict, self doubt and tension. Whatever you're battling with, you need to face it and let it out"

"well shit, I didn't expect your cards to fucking call me out like that..."

you're just like "It's what they do..."

he opens up to you a little more after that and takes a bit more time for himself.

Who would have though Raph's healing journey woulod begin with a witch telling him to get his shit together?

Mikey

He's been begging you for weeks to pull some cards for him

and he wants to know everything!

like everything, even the scary stuff

you finally give in and he can barely sit still he's so pumped when you pull the cards out

you ask what energy he brings into other's lives

the lovers, page of wands and 6 of swords

"what does it mean?!"

"well, the lovers is obvious. You bring a lot of love to the people in your life. You're the heart of your brother's. That's self explanatory"

"Awh, your cards like me" he's getting cocky now

"the page of wands is about being a free spirit, inspiration, ideas and limitless potential. Basically you keep everyone entertained with your never stopping pin balls machine of a brain"

"I am the ideas man of my brothers"

you let that one slide, no need to remind him of the time his "idea" to defeat the foot clan involved gummy worms....he was thinking with his stomach.

"And the 6 of swords is about transition and change, a right of passage, release like releasing baggage. I think this one's saying you haven't met your full potential of how you can help people yet, but you are destined to help people"

"wow. Really? Damn you're good"

you take the compliment, you are good at this.

Donnie

it's not that Donnie doesn't want a reading or find it interesting

it's that he just doesn't believe you can tell him anything new...

so you pull out a few cards on his behalf anyways

just to tell him a little more about himself that he doesn't realise

10 of wands reversed, strength and 3 of swords reversed

you follow him around for like 10 minutes after explaining the cards

while he's doing the dishes you're all "so the 10 of wands reversed is about doing it all and carrying a burden that you need to release it can also be defined as stubbornness!Come on, Donnie, that's so you. When you aren't working on whatever Leo gave you in the lab you;re spotting Raph in the gym or you're indulging Mikey is one of his fantasies, you need to stop carrying your brothers wants with you and live for you!"

He's trying to get his bunsen burner to work and you talk about "strength is basically the message believe in yourself.but it's also about compassion. You have so much of that that you never give to yourself!"

finally he turns to face you "And the last card?"

"3 of swords reversed is the most important. It's about negative self talk and releasing pain and forgiving yourself. I know you think you hide it well, but I can tell you beat yourself up over every little thing. You need to stop that"

He takes a minute to think

"Ok, maybe there is something to these cards, or maybe you're just interpreting them that way because you know me. Either way...Thank you. This was helpful"

[cairavende]

Worm Arc 15 thoughts without interludes (interludes need their own post):

EVERYTHING IS FIIIIIIIINE

My daughters boss didn't actually try to assassinate her, her just planned to do it and then did it in one reality but kept the reality where he didn't! So it's ok! I'm fine. Not worried at all that Coil knows Skitter was planning on double crossing him and that he found a way to screw with Tattletales powers.

It's fiiiine (eye twitches)

I want to say I'm glad she got her full team on board, but given that there is a chance someone on her team ratted on her it might not be good.

Skitter goes a little bit far at the end with Triumph. Just a tiny itty bitty bit far. Child you almost KILLED HIM! And then you let him sit there dying when the threat isn't that he'll die now, but that you will come back if needed (mayor ain't going to say what you want him to say if you kill his son, the point is if he doesn't say it you'll come back)! I'm worried about you.

Brian I understand why you like my daughter and she seems to like you and I'm glad having someone you feel safe with is helping you process your very valid trauma (important note, you could have done the same with your sister, she was trying to help you but you wouldn't open up to her, you should open up to her). But please don't get in the way of her relationships with her girlfriends. Just understand in terms of long term stuff Chatterbug and Wolfspider 100% trump . . . Darkbug? Fuck what are you guys called?

(I've been informed Shadeswarm, Nightcrawler, Night Biter, Creepy Crawlies, or Carapace. I think Creepy Crawlies might be my preference among that.)

MOAR DOLL LESBIAN CONTENT!!!!!

Parian is one of my absolute favorite characters! Flechette is pretty cool as well. Being a hero hurts her. Stabbing my daughter also didn't build good marks with me, but I understand why she did it. Cause GAAAAAAAAAAAY. I have a hard time being too mad at a lesbian stabbing someone to protect her girlfriend.

I'm glad Parian isn't joining Coil full hog at least, she's too pure to be a villain (or a "hero"). I kinda wish she could just move to New York and be a fashion designer and live her best life, but I do enjoy the idea of getting to see her more.

And to be honest, I don't think anyone on Earth Bet is really going to be living their best life in the long run. Sorry guys.

The fucking shutdown the team gives to the Nazis is AMAZING! Like ya no Hookwolf or Purity this time, that obviously would have made it harder. But still, comparing the previous fight to this just really shows how much the team has increased in power. They didn't even bring Grue.

Skitter and Tattletale being able to work together to find all the people in a few block radius and figure out which groups are Nazis, all while just standing in the middle of the street, is so fucking cool. I fucking love watching them work.

I don't love the girlfriends fighting with the whole "Skitter wasn't told about the plan to have Regent yoink a Nazi". But they seemed to make up pretty quickly.

Skitter fucking running multiple bug clones, with cameras and microphones, all across her territory, and using them to talk to people and check in on things, WHILE getting surgery on her shoulder??! FUCKING HELL. Like ok yes, please love yourself child and let yourself take it easy sometimes. But also holy shit that is so god damn amazing. I am 100% convinced (I mean, I have been since like Arc 4 TBH) that she uses her bugs to basically offload her pain. Or offloads her mind to her bugs so she can ignore the pain in her body. Same idea. Like even if it's never confirmed it is true to me. And the multitasking! Give Taylor a Thinker classification!!

Just fucking attacking the mayor's family to intimidate him into telling people in Washington to not condemn Brockton Bay huh? I mean sure it kinda worked at the end (assuming he does what he said he would) but it really seems like a terrible plan. Like, the people in Washington are gonna hear about the attack and wonder about everything the mayor says. But fine, that's the plan.

Skitter making the bug clones complex enough that Trickster and Genesis don't even notice she's a clone at first is super cool! Also it does drive home that she is always just covered with so many bugs and using swarm speech so much that when a version of her shows up that is completely covered in bugs and speaks fully with swarm speech it doesn't throw anyone off.

Coil had to know that Triumph was the mayor's kid. The fact that he's the one who pushed to have them attack during family dinner.

I'm really proud of Skitter for figuring it out though! I pegged him as a cape pretty much right away and was able to figure out it was Triumph not long after, but she was in the heat of the moment. Also she got the girlfriend pegged as a either Prism or Ursa while I was still uncertain if she was a cape.

Holy shit that fight was so fucking cinematic! Perfectly built for Triumph to look cool by exploding bug clones with his shouts. And with Prism splitting and combining constantly. Just fuck. I'd love to see an animation of that fight. It was super cool.

And again, Skitter got dark there. And sadly I'm worried she's gonna get darker.

[theseushasfallen]

Ok. So.

Currently, I find myself watching the 2011 remake of The Thing. And, because i’m a bitch with a hyperfixation, i’m thinking of how I could squish this and Trigun together to make a delightful mashup soup. Y’know, like mashing two ken dolls together to make them kiss.

So of COURSE i’m thinking of Cryptid/Uncanny/Monstrous Vash. He is always on my mind, any time any place, my babygorl who has Witnessed the horrors, and IS the Horrors.

And i’ve been thinking of this shit chronically, i’ve been planning a fic like this ever since i’ve begun to fully muse on how inhuman Vash is (COUGH, literal years). 

And one of my inspirations, is the fic Monster Boy by DeuBatty on AO3. And lemme tell you it’s put a fucken worm in my brain, its AWESOME I highly recommend going to check it out, its hella underrated and it gives the kinda energy I desperately wish to replicate.

So, here I am, trying to fit these pieces of crack infused bullshit together into a cohesive plotline, and this is how.

So, logically, I start with the Thing bit. Mmm. Aliens. (Mild spoilers for the Thing but it doesn’t go how you’d think lmao)

So currently, I’m stuck between only Vash being the alien in question, or both twins being aliens and Rem picking them up from the antarctic like ‘OOO FREE BABIES’

The second one is a bit self-explanatory, but the first is really, really funny, and I wanna explain to you why.

So. Lemme set the scene for you:

Science runs in the Saverem family. Rem’s a botanist who dabbles in archeo-botany, and her (adopted) son Nai is also quite taken with the pursuit of Archaeology. So when he’s called out on some,,,vague new trip to an outpost in the boonies of Antarctica to find some ancient, buried Structure, he’s elated.

So, he gets there, they dig up a frozen hunk of Something and leave it in the room like normal,,, but Nai thinks that something might not be right with the alien they dug up. So, still painfully sober and more than a bit paranoid, he goes to stare at a hunk of ice instead of socializing. 

And, well, whoop-dee-doo, he was right.

But instead of the ice bursting outward and the alien escaping though the roof like it does in the movie, Nai hears a pitiful scratching from within the ice. And then there are fissures, cracks. They multiply softly, as if the creature inside is unsure about its movements, intil the whole block is a veritable spiderweb of cracks.

Nai watches, frozen to the spot with something like horror as something pushes chunks of fractured ice out of the block, and reach out something that looks like what Nai can only describe as an appendage. 

Its something that looks closer to any crustacean or invertebrate, something with too many joints and a hard, shiny exoskeleton that gleamed iridesent black in lantern light. Things that could vaguely be called fingers (if one would squint) poked and prodded at the concrete floor curiously, examining the space with gentle caution.

And then more ice falls.  And more is revealed.

And Nai, only about a foot or so away from this thing, looks it in one glossy, black eye.

He screams. because of course he does, how could he not? The fucking alien he just dug out of the ice is ALIVE with questionable intention, how the hell is he supposed to cope with this shit when he could barely interact with his coworkers???

And in the process of screaming he ALSO freaks out the Alien, who screams back in much the same way that a canyon would- with Nai’s own voice.

So Nai, with his lightning quick reflexes, punches the thing. And slices his knuckles on its exoskeleton in the process.

Then he fucking books it back to the Rec Room, panicked screaming ensues about how “ITS ALIVE ITS ALIVE ITS ALIVE I CUT MY HAND ON IT I SCREAMED AND IT SCREAMED BACK-” 

And they’re all like. ‘what the hell. the serious stick-up-the-ass prissy Dr.Saverem wouldn’t josh about this shit.’ and they follow him back, and when Nai opens the door again they see that the ice?? is broken?? and with a glaring lack of alien??

Oh, and there’s a guy huddled in the corner. And when the door, yknow, slams open, he whips around (mans is butt-ass naked but he aint got no junk, just fucken ken doll smooth down there) and suddenly Nai is looking directly into his reflection.

The thing’s eyes widen, and it makes a strangled hurt-sound that sounds like the cry of a hawk more than anything human. And then it darts foreward towards Nai, everybody screaming around him as they scramble, but Nai himself is frozen as the thing takes his hand with the gentleness of family...

And then RIPS THROUGH THE SKIN OF ITS OWN NEW FINGERTIPS WITH ITS TEETH, and lets its blood out on Nai’s broken skin. It soaks into his open flesh as if he were a sponge, the throbbing overtaking his nervous system momentarily before the pain is gone and he watches his own skin knit back together seamlessly.

The alien chitters, something that sounds apologetic, and tries to smile at Nai, but it’s too wide and too sharp, teeth too large and lips too thin, and eyes too bright. But, strangely, it makes Nai feel better. He’s hit with a wave of attentative apology, the feeling not his own.

He chokes on his tongue, then slowly looks back at his coworkers, who had all watched the exchange with guns trained on either of them.

“Fuck.” Nai curses.

“F-uck.” The Alien echoes back with a tilted head, and stilted words.

Nobody knows what the hell to do with the sudden twin that Dr. Saverem had... acquired. So they just. Keep him around? Idk dude he picks up card games quickly, words even quicker, although they never sound right. Like a foreign accent, but something otherworldly and stilted. 

Nai and him, once they figured out the whole mind-link thing, could communicate pretty well, quickly gaining a bond. He serves as reluctant translator, resident alien babysitter, and knife-weilding peace-keeper. He doesn’t feel bothered by how his new brother seemed too tall, too gangly, too sharp. He doesn’t mind the way the alien cuddles up to him sometimes, winding circles around him like a particularly fleshy quilt that purred and clicked. Everyone else gets used to it too, although they mind his physical contact way less. 

Except for one of the investigative journalists that were hired, one Roberto De Niro, who just pats the alien’s head tiredly and throws him his cigarette-reeking coat whenever the little shit is looking particularly pathetic.

Eventually, they take him back to the states. They don’t talk about how four people came to the Arctic, and five came back.

Rem LOVES Nai’s new brother, smothers him and his human twin in blankets and kisses when they get home. She questions them, later, about it, and Nai could never keep a secret from his momma.

Eventually, they name him- something old and lovely, the name that Rem would’ve named her own son- Vash.

Something something shenanigans with meryl and milly and nicholas eventually, probably, idk i’m tired rn lmao and  this is LONG

[anachronistic-falsehood]

oh my godddd dude holy shit fuck okay taking a break from worm reading to send u an ask about william wight because goddamn i need 2 talk abt him. hello!!!!!!! feeling SO unwell about the clarences cape but red thing. awesome.

OKAY U HAVE LIKE. THE MOST PERFECT TIMING IN THE WORLDDD because literally on . tuesday this week my freak week art got a random note out of nowhere and made me start thinking about the villains again and thinking about william wight specifically because i love him a lot. ok. so its always ALWAYS been my assumption that. this is the version of william who mal got his greasy little claws in.

william fell off the cliff and died. the wisps chose him, and he came back. mal, who has been obsessively watching the wisps since clarence's death, sensed them choosing the next whisperer and swooped in before william could even stand back up. hes disoriented, hes scared, everything hurts, hes at a bottom of a cliff and he honestly doesnt even know if hes alive or not anymore, and this stranger walks out of the forest and offers a chance to explain everything. wiwi mystery brain! he knows this is weird but he also knows like.... i dont know whats happening maybe i AM dead and this is just... waht the afterlife is like. so he goes with mal. william wisp the 16 yr old from deadwood is. well. dead. he went missing, nobody ever found his body, his family mourned him.

meanwhile the whole time mallard conway was taking william wight under his wing and training him to be a replacement. mal calls him whisperer, william is in his rebellious teen phase and wants to be called something cooler which is why he named himself Wight (a type of vengeful spirit. specifically one who was once alive and then was brought back from the dead. lol) william is still! technically half alive. so being in the spirit world for extended amounts of time (which is NOT something mortals are supposed to do, planeswalker or not,) kind of broke his brain a little bit? which is why Wight is LIke That.

williams whole thing when he was alive was solving mysteries and chasing down monsters, so that became (and forgive my use of dp fanon here, i have to) his Obsession. (obsession with a capital O because its.. ghost logic. whatever a ghost died doing becomes their core motivation in the afterlife etc etc dp fanon not sorryyyyy) so he has this. uncanny obsession for tracking down monsters when hes out of the spirit world. being separated from the spirit world for any amount of time kind of drives him nuts, hes so used to being around the dead that being around the living for extended periods of time is unsettling. hes super paranoid. he inherits mal's need for total control over a situation, which is why hes so lax about possessing people with the wisps to get them to do what he wants.

perfect that his best friend turns out to be the absolutely diehard loyal guard dog. (side note here i think he also has williams super high pain tolerance from dead nerves so he lets kota gnaw on his arms and shit) . virion is a mystery to him and he LOVES it, he cant figure this guy out, hes like an endlessly fascinating puzzle to crack open. studying him like a lab rat on a dissection table.

i think about him a normal amount. as you can tell.

Mac i am TOO FUCKING DRUNK to peroperly respond to this but oh my god. oh my godddd yehah. the obsession thing???????? Hello??????? putting that in my pocket!!!!!! ohhgh he’s paranoid being around living people he’s a control freak he’s sooo fucjed up <33333333 he absolutely lets kota chew on him like a chew toy <3 and he can’t get a proper read on virion so he’s obsessed w trying to peel back his layers and learn as much as he can!!! throwing ashe into the mix is like. doubly fascinating for him. bc i think villain ashe would b secretive enough about his civilian identity to intrigue william(<<wants to disguise that he could possibly have any connection to wavelength the hero) and wiwi is INVESTED in trying to figure out him and virion!! what r their secrets!!! he NEDSS TO KNOW!!!!!!! to me his vibes r kinda like the weylin twins. u feel me

[pluto-murphy-writes]

hey guys! I'm watching Lisa Frankenstein so here are my notes!

I already love the black and white opening credits/prologue

nice match cut to...not the modern day but you know, when the story is taking place

oooooh pretty animated title

GREAT soundtrack already

god i love the fashion

the WORK it takes to make Kathryn Newton even mildly unattractive

ngl I wish there was somewhere outside I could go to be alone. like a cemetary

I love Lisa so much

oh ok Taffy is stepsis

jfc what a backstory

lol the growing audience to Taffy's story

honey nooooooo don't chug the party beer

haha smooching teens

thank you Zelda Williams for not showing puke

Murder. Murrrrrrder Doug

this feels like a stage production and I'm so here for it

oh I am loving the style change

haha! Man in the moon!

AAAAAAH IT'S CARLA GUGINO

tf is up with Lisa's boss lol

"we have to spend more time together" then don't be a bit-

hahaha such an accurate depiction of how I walk around when I'm home alone

"the ✨other girl✨"

aww he lost a hand

just chilling with a zombie it's cool

"are you going to talk?" *horrible groaning* "copy that"

I love that she's 1000% chill with a zombie as long as he isn't killing her

Dale is just. 100% just wants to get out of here

noooooot at all worrying about what she's gonna DO with the zombie in her closet

I am enjoying Manic Pixie Dream Zombie tho

please kill Janet

awww piano. oh his poor fingies

that was such a great long take

oh my god I think she actually ate a worm

Oscar Wilde vs Oscar the Grouch lol

Dammit Janet (100% why her name is Janet)

not the grippy socks! 😱

side note: love the peach ring rings

I love an unapologetic angry teen girl

oooooh he gets upgrades with the tanning bed, that's clever

"...crimper accident ☺️"

ngl Lisa and The Creature are both my type

i love that he gets slowly more alive-looking

oh they're so cute together

i have legit only heard this song from Horton Hears a Who

they had so much fun with this movie I'm cackling

ohhhhhh no they're figuring out the lieeee

pffft the vibe-back-massager

pffffft "other places" I can never watch this with my in-laws

"time is the wound" ....damn

i could kill for those eyebrows on Cole tbh

lisa do you know how to drive

"dress code violation" bitch how

of cooourse that's who her sister was sleeping with

ooohoohoho flying peen

I feel so bad for Taffy tbh

HE JUST DUMPED A COP IN A GRAVE acab

aww return of the peach ring ring

this is so cute fuuuuuuck

i wanna fuck cole sprouse Who said that?

I am crying. about a tanning bed

this whole fucking movie is practical effects and I love that

oh good they did find Janet

he can TALK! And his hair looks so nice!

okay, final verdict: it was a bit violent, but that's not really a bad thing. some of the dialogue felt a bit stiff but all the actors seemed to enjoy being there! Super funny, too!

[xaiviah-sinnmoimoi-moi]

Gday. I want to open your whole world to possibilities where the impossible is very real and the person you know now will be no longer just seeker but believer.. my name is Cindy Isabelle Schulter and I now go by The Sinn of His Erotic Pleasure...I have had many names and many roles in life..come on I dare Open your Mind and off the Hay Ride and watch how my insanity my trauma my embarrassing moments my loves in life have helped me to beat death and taxes ..To one creator and the jealous god who retarded ways of making us blind to the pain we feel because they cut your balls through men abd suck dry of our emotions our orgasms abd they die but live on through through powerful through false idealism and why not see how i do that "the other" will always be the death you. the older the person who spits spire and might at you the more powerful you will become..one day you are happy with yoirself then like deja Vu you meet the opposite one the Holy thsn thou too good true..the best eho fuvkover the saughter sonvnever knew you had..the nausea of rejection ..the jealoys father abd mother...don't hide behind the words of bsd manners avd lscknredpect remorse of the guilty ones.. i habe to start one day explainimg my own truth abd what thise who dreams of us and the heros in our lives had to show...i am woman all that want towards the end of middle years was great sex a chance explsin my side of the story a d redemption retribution plus the full karms of what was not just to me or my kids or the Voice of pain whobusevthe voice of reason iny life ...bury head snd stop reading now if you think that tsking msn manhood and suffer ainful sex or being blamed fir other avtions or someone you pive tyrninv aeay ftomabd rdgusing to see that the torturer the cock chopchop orthe woman who jides behind a mask flasehood will never punished like before..I once said I habe harmed or wsnted be involved witb that hortibke way i was taught ti learn to like well dont abd prepared to literally jump thtohh ethers abd strike with vemom she gave me...bare with..lets breathe lets release the binds og a bitch wjo dlrsmt respect snyone jot even herself and me i am in love but i am letting go simce horny fucked i want bitch to disolves and rewch heihht she with using ke as her foothold ..so i challenge tbode eho taught the worse things abd who became with myigtbfor all those in plight. You can dish it but .#......# can you take it without being a pus pus pum pum or the tits of yuk on a person who never gave you the authority nor approval you had my heart and my kids but now after your verysny attempts of murder torture extra I say hahaha I have nothing to be guilty about I have nothing to stone myself too I am allowed to think your scum disgusting and shut fuck but I also coward .so get your purid worming s lf off me tits miss bits....and show me what got as your basic original no humanitarian or human eating persona of professional Hollywood and whoa dude cops robbers batman and shebang..charmed temptation neglect regret and absolution if you didn't want their approval what exactly is your point... you say no..I say yes..you say tomato is yellow belly low...

anyway to all else hold who knows what come next but welcome to second blog on Tumblr I had another one called only-belief...there I had my role I. life somewhat robotic but I now have to say yo you I have to regret or be ashamed until.i get undressedsee what rot of you is in the reflections of eyes..I don't get to nurture with kinds and I guess goodness I have a person who I have major issues with but that ok I didn't chose it's not my bad miss ....hmmm

pum pum

I fell in love so many times twice with born children two men capture my adoring eye and those who hurt me I could find something nice to say even in a rain day

....I wonder when will wake and not be embarrassed by how someone makes me feel like a rotten jealousy old woman and man ..I always when I was what mum is problem with me..well now u have no choice but kudos for ferl so rotren eitb svts and his i wdnted due first for me i sudng care if the ehile blew up..inelove won't firesaje abd you will ve jist memory good day be bless

to all innocent's and those who enter my little Omniverse of dreams are made these and boats below with me and navy ..

loving life despite my inflicted disabilities I tend to find myself evolving a d want yo succeed I. areas I never thought I would ever want to enter..what they I can't do.i will butoy if reasonates abd you nothjbv me get it get it get it..upward dog..pray mantis tic tac toe...chest shot..shut shut shut little retard in a tutu a Broadway play a mascot and a sinking society of more than inhumane acts of ignorance or ommitance or well this far might as well shit the hostage abd myself the foot..

think about i want to be free of beautiful ugly woman who hurt our youngem a d start wars that Argentina can't cry for and Casablanca who say whatever the future will will be we won't see ..oh ah he ha he ho yet someone le says Cindy or Sinn Moi I can see ..more than you..I can rwsvg frk. my place miles even 3500 miles away and touch you in way you deserve my enemies my pet peeves of rapists tortures and those who give the world owes them more the Almighty does..I remember thing why happening to me..then a day so I thoughtwhynot I mean just the rot of the other and my not willing to fuel a fire of shit or. aca or asshole and cads and instead see both or every angle I can and I have listen you with your attitude I just well I won't but today the day I send out what ever fish to.me or anyone since tren till now to further is coming back more than just in threes oflr fds you will if you hit might succeed but the force of it will be a jolly lol on you that why I ask you can dish all you cuts burns and punchs and rape and tortured on me who doesn't really even gave you a home or advice which I could shut or got some to hsrm you fir whst did i could hsbe go more proactively yo couet abiut you guts but no i didn't

so please I going to do it

countdown 19.13 ..by19.25 pm on 31st July 2024 I literally throw all back at you and even though you are hiding in me I will be rid you when I able to see what is still hidden from me..but you s lf now have many options but one that you cling beside k

mine jolly jolly joy joy and gang of boags mors and spilt in-between privacy and evasion you have shock a nation and including

you dishes now it turns abd clings yo you every thing I see right threatening me

..

1, 2 ,3.33= postman sent parcel that wasn't for I didn't even open but now I wish I knew if he really love just even for one day before you fucked it over with your hatred your ugly bloody manners your putrid ony own ugliness when I think of and the men I use care about and my children I hope for till this day but now I am not broken but really say it's coming right for ...#......#

hold on hold on to those orgasms which I love giving me but now hurts for you you lying fucking bitch

I will forget the nor my beautiful now dead me wonderful kid you use

I will remember I am a bit person infected by a putrid other who thought I owed her when I regret to say I don't think so

so now return your favours your so call love for me your nightmarish wonders you give my children and the world will be my witness and I encourage myself to evolve but basically still ok not yet throwing towel but no sweetie I never will marry nor commit to anyone in fear thee hurtingied than have and yes even I was surprised that I am such a stupid bitch yet you always steal thunder my powers my academic achievement my flowering youthfulness yet here I not myself to be awaken to your unholy glory

so be brave those who ga more than the stupid selfish Cindy Schulter we ho is me me me me not you yut for fuck your our of luck lady or not

doiad you took that love from me for obviously he never cared about me but was allowing myself to make a point of you

so I bow I courtesy and I saw oh unholy I am not done with you...

karma is activated in your soul and I move on from you and watch even though even look my chest sc how when being fucked you steal the thunder the fum and give a rjt view if your pint of you but as said to get yourself yih had be me lol I don't think tkoughyou do.rit my to the ping I think.i won't even hate myself unless I remindedysekf or you say I a. like thee no no no

noti moioi I. evil now not good for I am goj g to enjoy despite you killjoy pum pum and uc you be your rwl self and nut takeaway what I have always had and naturaxbless nigyoyagsi you do itagsi. snddtg because face your fucki g esdtiny

well donedhyf gofguck htei now in my whole space of what I want and I patient just fucking fucking stupid murder selfish cunt who hurt my and br er ever looks herself honestly

so I ofcto been at I want and you can hurt me always by hurt children. or what not but at least bi cam say it's not my bad and I glad I was your victim for at least iwad that rude to anyone but hut mys kf

And yeah I hated myself but guess I despise and hope you not only get yourrevking but your karma and I bet only one who feels sorry and pickthe oyeve that shedoff you in shame your acts so please don't be fool IAm not your enemy you are mine

The father thevson and the holy Spirit

Pleaenore people many typos in here I call it the typoslut

.where someone or even your fear or lack of knowledge not necessarily interferseithyour abilitytoexpress yourself eordly on a screen rather than penned down until presentable and neaten

I will state this the first draft and I will update this withahringe or or a laugh

I wish I could literally forget certain but they determined to be presence in my life despite complaining earte utos isn't right mum

..bye for now have great time and I will reite better intro so

But with anything there is no set plan or plot just need to touch base with myself without the social rot I used to think I cpuld you care about and they hopefully stop harming everyone including me...but nah they further and sometimes literally throw at lowest act I see and feel

I wrote more but I was obviously not allowed according to Rotten personi made into by looking at her ridiculous head popping out of my cheek while the man I fell in love with fucked her so what lucky you I am stupid then but hopefully one day I willoce on well and you be satisfied a d I akreafykniwdtipid me can you leave now please says me Sinn

Kudosmym glad ilearnt not be like you at all says your ex daughter Cindy Isabelle Schulter

[eunchancorner]

Ok this might be a bit out of the ordinary, but bear with me pls. Ler Bob and Lee Kevin. Hear me out! The candy teases and methods Bob could use

‘You taste sweeter than candy’ while nibbling

I guess this could take place where Bob isn’t a murderous cannibal?(This popped in my head and I found it cute I’m sorry)

Feel free to take this as a request if you want. If not, have a good day :D

BIG BRAIN- Oki oki so yea I saw this AU floating around where Bob is more like an uncle or babysitter to Skid and Pump so let’s just say this is that. And he’s also friends with Kevin (and, ofc, Streber) bc yes

Ler Bob, Lee Kevin (Also a bit of Ler Streber and Lee Bob)

Warning: A lot of cussing lmao

Word count: 1092

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kevin stood from the couch with a slight groan as he heard a knock at the door, leaving the movie he had been watching playing in the background. He walked over to the door of his small apartment, opening it and being scooped into a big, warm hug before he knew what was happening.

Of course, it didn’t take much for him to understand. Him, Bob and Streber had been planning a movie night for some time now and tonight was the fateful night. The movies Kevin had been watching were far less realistic horror movies to help him prepare himself (he seemed to be the only one in this damn town who struggled with watching horror movies) and Streber had gone out to get more candy, knowing how much it’d be appreciated. Kevin would have been working but thankfully he had a day off today, so Streber had gone to the grocery store and wouldn’t be back for a while. And, of course, Bob had offered to make dinner for the night, stopping by the grocery store himself and picking up some steak on the way to Kevin’s place.

Bob had apparently decided to hug him before saying a single word, which was pretty typical for him. After the hug, he set Kevin back on his feet, a grocery bag dangling from his hand that no doubt contained their dinner for the night.

“Kevin, nice to see you again. Where’s your lil’ boyfriend?” he asked, his height allowing him to easily see over his friend and into the otherwise empty apartment.

“He’s out buying candy for us, since we figured with you around, we’d probably need more,” Kevin explained, stepping aside so Bob could come in.

“Aw, c’mon, I don’t eat that much candy!”

“Last year you ate me, Streber’s AND your candy!”

“Can ya blame me? You two weren’t gonna finish it anyway,” he argued as he put the steak in the fridge, before he sat down on the couch, Kevin sitting beside him. He snorted a little at the movie he had put on.

“Is this really what you’re watchin?” he asked, smirking a bit at the small blush he saw rising on his friend’s cheeks.

“Listen, horror movies aren’t my thing, so I’m trying to mentally prepare myself.”

“For what? Shitty CGI and the most fake-lookin props? Trust me, you’re gonna wanna try some real horror movies to steel yourself. This ain’t gonna cut it,” he told him, poking the much shorter man in the forehead. Kevin swatted his hand away, growling slightly.

“If I can’t prepare myself with bad horror movies, how am I gonna prepare at all?” he countered, both nervous and a little fed-up.

“What, you can’t take a little horror? Poor Kevin, are you gonna scream at a little monster?~” Bob teased his tiny (in comparison) friend, making him huff.

“No but… grrr, you’re such an ass,” he complained, attempting (without much success) to shove at the far taller man. Of course, a false offended gasp was the first sign to Kevin that he had fucked up.

“Did you just try to shove me?”

“W-waitwaitwait, Bob, I-I know what you’re thinking, but hear me out!” Kevin panicked, a small smile worming onto his face as he backed into the corner of his couch, already well aware of what his friend had in mind.

“One chance.”

Ok Kevin, don’t fuck this up. DON’T tell him he’s an ass AGAIN out loud. Don’t do it, don’t do it!

“You’re an ass.”

GODDAMMIT.

“Ohohoho, you just fucked up,” Bob stated as though Kevin didn’t already know, grabbing his arm and yanking him closer, pinning him to his chest before using his free hand to claw at his ribs, making the much smaller squeal.

“NAAHAHAHOHOHOHO BOHOHOB! LEHEMME GOHOHO! LEMME GO!” the small ravenette kicked and cackled, pounding his free hand into the chest that entrapped him on one side. He almost hated the way the warmth of his friend’s sweater made him wanna just melt and take it. But at the same time, it tickled so badly and he couldn’t help the instinct to squirm and kick.

“Aw, poor lil candy kid, can’t even take a few tickles?~” the much bigger ravenette teased softly, delighting in the flustered squeal Kevin let out. “Streber must love doin this~”

“SHUHUHUHUT!” said ‘candy kid’ demanded, slamming his hand into Bob’s stomach a little harder than he should have, enough to get him to stop with an “Oof!”

As it slowly loaded into Kevin’s mind what just happened, he looked up at his friend.

Oh fuck.

“Alright that’s fucken IT!”

Before he knew what was happening, the world was moving fast around him and suddenly he was staring at the ceiling, his shirt pulled up past his belly and a certain huge friend playfully nibbling at the exposed tum. He squealed and kicked and pushed at his friend’s head, cackles once again flowing from his lips at just how much it tickled, and Bob’s slight little beard and stupidly fluffy hair only made his situation worse!

“BAHAHAHAB! AHAHA I’M SAHAHAHAREEHEHEHEHE!! PLEHEHEHEASE!” he begged fruitlessly.

“Mmmm” Bob rumbled against his belly, making him squeal brightly yet again, “I might not need that candy, you’re even sweeter~”

“PLEHEHEHEASE!! IHIT TIHIHICKLES SOHOHO BAHAHAD!!”

“Promise to stop callin me an ass and then hurtin me?”

“YEHEHEHES! I PROHOHOHOMIHIHISE!!”

“You sure?~”

“BOHOHOHOHOB!!”

“Fine, fine,” the taller finally let up, laying the smol candy store worker on the couch and getting up to make dinner. Kevin tried his best to regain composure, wiping away tears of mirth, trying to quiet his giggles and will away blush, and letting the tingles in his belly subside. Only a few seconds after Bob left, he heard the door open and that familiar voice.

“Baby, I’m hooome! I got pl- uhh… Did Bob do this?” Streber asked as he saw what had become of his poor, ticklish boyfriend, who nodded tiredly.

“Of course he did. Stay here, guard this, I’ll be back in a few seconds!” he instructed him as he handed him the candy and kissed his forehead before he went into the kitchen.

“Bob! What have I told you about tickling my boyfriend!?” a falsely enraged yell came from the kitchen, one that definitely belonged to Kevin’s dear lover.

“What- wait- S-Streber, I’m cookin STREBER NOHOHO!!” Of course, Kev was never gonna warn Bob of exactly how much revenge he was gonna get. That was for him and him alone to find out.

Though it was fun to listen to.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ah, beautiful bois. Also dw about Kevin, they ended up watching action comedies.

[noitsbecky127]

rebecca watches ds9: emissary

ok I decided to just not liveblog tng but I’m gonna give it a shot again for ds9! I am told this is the best one so I’m excited

ah yes, borg picard

rip to all these fucking starships

rip jennifer too

quite a beginning!

healthy father-son relationship!!! gotta love it

and there’s deep space nine!!!!

gonna be weird not to hear the “space, the final frontier” monologue

damn this place is a DUMP

oh the ferengi! clearly they won’t be leaving

oh god kira is Intense lmao

odo! the goo man!

I’m not sure the Prime Directive applies here lmao

why DOES sisko want quark to stay

ah ok, for the economy

kira arms,,,,,,

well let’s hope the govt doesn’t fall! civil war sucks

do bajorans have a thing for ears or

ah yes, time travel

so what exactly ARE the orbs then

why does no one in star trek ever specify what the thing someone is gonna want to see is?

i guess quark opened up shop again!

jadzia is so hot oh my god

ok bashir seems like a dick but the fandom likes him so i look forward to seeing how that happens

two hours. slow computers indeed

ah a worm flashback

gross

gul dukat showed up and my dad, who has never seen a cardassian, went “yuck”

the what belt

sisko wanted quark to stay here, why would he close the place suddenly

of course odo was the bag. somehow i’m not surprised

ok they have a vehicle, so they can boldly go places if they so desire

oh is that the wormhole i’ve heard about?

yep! gamma quadrant!

hm. all narrative evidence suggests that this is the celestial temple. it does not look terribly celestial

jadzia’s perspective seems to disagree!

wonder why they’re seeing it differently

we lost dax!

“what is this time?” ah so these are EXTREMELY different creatures

how tf do you create a wormhole??? (i say, with no idea how wormholes work)

“it’ll take two months” “we need it there tomorrow” kira do you understand how time works

none of this plan makes any sense. that’s how trek works ig

odo said he has no idea if there are any others like him and dad was like “i sure hope not!”

bashir expects people to be quite a bit smarter than they are

these creatures don’t even BELIEVE linear time exists

baseball still exists in the 24th century. great news for my dad

that cardassian is really close to the screen!

no shields????

NO ONE understands the passage of time here

bashir’s about to get hit HARD by reality

why is jennifer a perfect pristine corpse? she should be all fucked up. i’m not even sure what the cause of death is

(i know why she’s a perfect pristine corpse)

but the “i see her like this” would hit harder if she was all fucked up

and there goes all your photon torpedos! hope you don’t wind up needing those

dad asked me “how are they fooling them into thinking they’ve got five thousand photons?” and i would like to know the same thing

episode 1 and the station’s already in peril. classic

wonder what’s IN the gamma quadrant, aside from those weird guys

oh I like Kira

alright that was the pilot!!! i’m a fan

[schrodingers-hoarding-problem]

Jae's Asian Drama Masterlist

a list of all the asian shows I've ever watched (competed, we don't talk about the ones I've been meaning to finish for the past two years), not including any animation

all of them have some form of romance because at my heart I am a slut for a good romance, colored ones are those that changed my brain chemistry

Korean:

Romance is a Bonus Book (my first ever Kdrama and the first one I saw on this list, will always hold a special place in my heart)

Hotel Del Luna (iu my beloved, it did make me very sad at some points, but the dynamic between the main characters so so so good, jealous jang manwol is the best thing)

Light On Me

The Tasty Florida

To My Star

You Make Me Dance

Mr. Heart

Color Rush

Doom at Your Service (I say this is my favorite Kdrama, but honestly it has some really heavy competition. I am not above saying im a little bit attracted to whenever doom fucks someone up ok)

Wish You: Your Melody From My Heart

Kiss Goblin

Where Your Eyes Linger

Run On (its just so sweet y'all, one of the most refreshing shows I've ever seen in my life, the characters feel so real and the relationships are amazing)

Semantic Error (this is where the heavy competition is, both the movie and series versions are insanely good, I just can't recommend it enough)

Tinted With You

A-Teen (currently rewatching it with my best friend, is the essential hs Kdrama, explores so many of the problems that teens face without minimizing them, really embraces that lonely/scary feeling of being in such a turbulent time in your life)

Roommates of Poongduck 304

Business Proposal (the romcom of all time, if you are someone who enjoys a good trope or a well done cliche this is the place for you, it will make you laugh so hard and feel so much)

Our Dating Sim (aljslkasjfkd so so cute, very much Semantic Error vibes and I love that, loved the dynamic and characters so much)

The Eighth Sense (yes give me the good mental health representation, women friends, and cute relationships)

Dream (movie, watched it just for IU tbh)

Thai:

Love in the Air

Kinnporsche (this gave me indescribable brainworms but I could never explain it)

The Eclipse (the series really benefited from how comfortable first&khaotung are with each other, honestly they are friendship goals, but the show itself really tackles some great issues in the schooling system and how they relate to oppression overall)

Until We Meet Again

Between Us (yeah Tumblr really won with this one, I saw one too many winteam posts and had no choice, I do love a relationship driven show and the way the show pulled in discussions about trauma and family struggles was wonderful, I have never seen more of a middle child than win)

Bad Buddy (what can I say, once again the actors have insane chemistry and their comfort with each other really shows on screen, also nanon really is just a powerhouse actor, its sort of a modern Romeo and Juliet but has the most open & honest communication in any media I've ever seen)

Cutie Pie

Cutie Pie 2 You

My School President (may have changed me as a person? I don't even know how to describe how important this show has become to me)

Bed Friend (loved the characters, idk if it gave me worms yet tho)

Only Friends (at my heart i am a sucker for anything First & Khao are in)

Japanese:

Takara-kun & Amagi-kun

My Love Mix-up! (Keita Hatsukoi)

My Beautiful Man (Utsukushii Kare)

My Beautiful Man 2

Taiwanese:

Be Loved in House: I Do

HIStory 3: Trapped

Because of You 2020

Chinese:

The Untamed (I don't even know how to explain the brainworms this show and the novel it's based on has given me, but we do love a fun period piece)

[ankhisms]

ok i didnt take a lot of screenshots while i watched but i did write down some thoughts as i was watching so heres episode 41-44 thoughts

ep 41

really fucked up that ZECT has a like gas bomb that makes worms lose their mimic abilities and then they go in and kill them like honestly in that scene it seemed like the worms were like hiyori and rich boy and reina like just living normal lives not harming anyone. frankly im on the worms side here that was fucked up

tendou really climbed an entire mountain just to be dramatic on the top because of course he did

theres a new goth guy in town with a trench coat that hes got the hood pulled up on so you know he means evil business

"what does it mean that i am the top of zects son" kagami how have you gone this long without knowing that your dad is the boss of zect. like i know youre estranged. but you work for zect.

aw rich boy is so worried about his besties being hurt

kagami has admitted that it was a lavender marriage

tosses glitter and falls over, dead

KAGAMI HAS BEEN TACKLED AND HANDCUFFED FOR TRYING TO SEE HIS DAD. I HATE HIS DAD..kagami we need to kill your dad

renge voice how did you get an entire huge bed with a canopy over it inside our tiny ass cafe. did you really have to sleep here. tendou voice who cares. have breakfast. dont question anything that happens anymore

POURING SUGAR ALL OVER THE TOFU WHATRE YOU DOING

"the end is close" ok thats not ominous at all. normal things your dad says to you

"father why was i born" kagami..... kagami my friend kagami )): i havent seen anything about the end of kabuto but i do genuinely have a bad gut feeling about how everything might end for kagami like im concerned about him

the hoppers looking at rich boy and going god i wish someone would call me young master and spoil me and rich boy going hahaha so true. who the fuck are you guys again is so funny. and then theynjust start fighting for no reason like ok yeah sure

"please dont hold a grudge against my son" "i dont hold any grudges against kagami" dont worry mr zect president tendou is holding something else entirely against your son. as in hes holding him in his arms and um

"im not doing this for zect im doing it for someone i trust" aw kagami. i still think its a bad fucking plan

OK SURE HE WAS A WORM THE WHOLE TIME. SURE. WHY NOT.

"i wont trust anyone anymore" GOD. KAGAMI. IM VERY WORRIED ABOUT HIM LIKE WOW. HIS LIFE SUCKS CURRENTLY

THEYRE PUNCHING KAGAMI REALLY FAST HASNT HE GONE THRU ENOUGH

i get kagami might be a bit shocked that the guy hes been working with at zect and really trusted is a worm but like. i dont understand him having such a violent and like disgusted angry response to him like kagami knows that hiyori is a worm and knows that tsurugi is a worm and he has no issues with them?? and like his team mate guy was trying to protect him and help him and rushed over to see if he was ok and tried to help him up so its just kind of like. kagami i get you might be shocked but this is still the same guy youve always known and respected and trusted its just like. cmon now

ep 42

"time only flows for me" ok sure! whatever the fuck! i just am accepting every single thing that happens now because like yeah why not. this might as well happen enough bizarre unexplainable shit has happened already we might as well through something else in

watching a hostage tape ransom message on a projector

ok the zect counsel is like hooded mysterious figures. makes sense

TOFU DUEL......... TWO!!!!!!!!

i can not believe i forgot about kagami having a brother which was a whole thing in the beginning which was very tragic and sad it feels like the whole direction and feeling of the show has changed so much since then

baseball with feelings

"i kept seeing my sister in her" UM. DONT SAY THAT

i love kagami pushing open his jacket and touching the gattack belt in the same kind of movement an old wild west cowboy would do to reach for his gun holster in a shootout its very fun

misaki why did you say yes to going out with him suddenly. misaki please

it feels meaningful to me that tadokoro comes to save kagami and fight the other worm in his human form.... and then him reaching out to help kagami up and kagami taking his hand vs how kagami reacted when he first found out. cries

you may be able to stop time but consider this: im the fucking sun

not gorou chan is so mad about not being able to launch a missile attack. typical government behavior

TENDOU DITCHED THEIR TOFU DUEL

uh oh the other tendou is here

ep 43

other tendou skips into the cafe and is like lalalaaa im going to kill tendou. okay byeeeeeeee and skips out

"hiyori doesnt want to see you any more" DONT SAY THAAAAT HES HER BIG BROTHERRRRR

i do enjoy tendou two as a character so far hes fun

"how did you come here from the edge of time and space" "lol not telling you"

help this really is like this universe isnt big enough for two tendous

tendou two, while beating tendou up: whyre you hitting yourself stop hitting yourself

why must we fight the goth evil worm guy why cant we kiss him

cant visit your boyfriend in the emergency care ward of the hospital unless you look hot

the evil goth worm guy being able to copy any attack he gets hit with is a fun twist

IM NOT MISAKINU. IM MISAKI. YOU TELL HIM GO

"when my mimic defeats me" tendou. dont fucking say that. but also it makes sense. hes the kind of big brother who would sacrifice himself to save his little sisters. but like tendou. tendou your sisters need you alive. kagami needs you alive

"keep it all a secret from kagami" STOP!+!!!!!!! NO. YOU KNOW THIS IS GOING TO BREAK HIS HEART YOU KNOW HE WOILD DO ANYTHING TO STOP YOU FROM SACRIFICING YOURSELF

crying and sobbing about tendou teaching jyuka to cook. he loves both his little sisters so much but also he misses hiyori and cooking with hiyori was their sibling bonding activity

aw tendou two loves hiyori in his own way and doesnt want hiyori to be sad ):

the scene with tendou saying i have to die to save hiyori and kagami trembling and yelling AND I HAVE TO WATCH AND DO NOTHING WHILE YOU DIE?? they were in love there

yknow what i cant even blame hiyori for saying shes not returning to the world ever again. its her choice she should be allowed to make that choice. but also. sad

ep 44

i kind of wonder if hiyori was written out of the show because her actress was needing to do something else but i could always be wrong it just is kind of what the whole deal felt like

NOT MY RICH BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!

did not at all expect kageyama to stop his hopper-isms and put on a suit and be THA BEE again but im proud of him

oh he fucking got his ass kicked. well he tried

LETS GO HOME.... WAAAAAA... I LOVE YOU SIBLINGS...

i do feel bad for tendou two like it kind of seems like his entire existence was made to revolve around pretending to be tendou to keep hiyori there or whatever but also they had him fucking chained up and locked away tortured and now hes all alone. that sucks so bad for that guy

oop kageyama took off his suit hes back on the path of hell

OK TENDOU TWO IS GOING CRAZY. OK. DID HE JUST FUVKING KILL HIYORI. HOLY SHIT

[latte-fairytaekwoon]

Noona, Do You Not Like Younger Men? (Choi San+Jung Wooyoung)

Pairing: Choi San× Milf! Reader (Female)× Jung Wooyoung

Genre: Smut, Fluff, Idol AU.

Summary: Maybe going over to pester their favorite manager during her vacation wasn't such a bad idea, especially if it ends up with them getting what they always fantasized about every night.

Word Count: 4.2+K

Warnings: Age differences (still within legal boundaries), breast play including titty fucking (yeah I'm aware some of us don't have huge tits, I'm part of that squad but we can dream ok?) fingering, m+f+m threesome, ass grinding, spanking, degradation.

Taglist: @little-precious-baby @galaxteez @multidreams-and-desires @yunhofingers @yunhoiseyecandy @deja-vux @daniblogs164 @brie02 @couchpotatoaniki @a-soft-hornytiny

▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄

Y/N's eyes squinted at the two younger males who casually showed up at her home, uninvited and already letting themselves in as if they owned the place.

"Hi Noona. Did you miss us?" The older one of the two squished her cheeks together, earning him a slap on his wrist, which he did not appreciate.

"Aww Noona, now look what you've done. You made him sad." The other male pointed to the other's pout.

"Choi San and Jung Wooyoung, just what the hell do you think you're doing here?" She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Isn't it obvious? We came to keep you company!" San cheerfully exclaimed.

"We know you missed us so we decided to come over and spend time with our favorite manager." Wooyoung added as he went over to try and cling an arm around the older woman, but she brushed his hand away.

"Ok, in case you guys didn't know, I'm on vacation, a well needed vacation from my manager duties. Specifically from you two! You little brats who constantly give me migraines and high blood pressure. I got this vacation to get away from you both!"

The boys were taken aback by her outburst, looking back and forth between each other and then returned their faces back to her. Their somber and disappointed expressionism soon bursted out in laughter, confusing the woman in front of them.

"Oh Noona! You're so funny." San giggled.

"We know you love and adore us so much. And you're happy that we came to keep you company!" Against her will, and more since she was outnumbered, she let Wooyoung and San each take one of her arm and drag her over to the living room where they sat her down and started arranging the space so they could have a small movie day. Y/N let out slow and deep breaths as she tried not to lose her patience and just let the boys run around her house as they started putting the snacks they brought with them into bowls. She could hear them muttering angrily to each other from the kitchen, no doubt telling each other to be careful less they accidentally broke one of her plates. In less than 10 minutes, they had about  7 or 8 different bowls full of different snacks, ranging from crispy chips, to sour gummy worms and even different types of sweet chocolates.

"We even got mochi ice cream! Would you like some?" Wooyoung enthusiastically shoved the case that contained assorted flavors of the icy dessert.

Knowing she might as well enjoy the gluttonous snacks while she could, Y/N skimmed her hand over them and picked out one of the mint chocolate mochis and stuffed it in her mouth. Unbeknownst to her, the man on her right was staring at her with a wide smile as she ate the ice cream. When she noticed, she gave him a puzzled look and scooted further away from him.

"You chose the mint chocolate flavor." He giddily stated.

"Yes....any problem with that?" She questioned.

San emitted happy squeals at that.

"I love mint chocolate flavor too! Don't you see Noona? This further proves that were soulmates and destined to be together!"

Without even asking or warning, he snuggled himself against her, an arm around her waist as he used her chest as a makeshift pillow. Coming back from the kitchen, Wooyoung glared at San when he saw how close he was with their manager.

"Hey! No fair. Don't hog Noona up for yourself. We promised to share!" He quickly jumped on the other side and tried to tangle himself around her, proving to be difficult when San was pushing him away. Y/N ended up being pulled and tugged from both sides as the boys fought amongst themselves for her. Fed up with their antics, she reached her hands over and smacked both of their thighs sharply, making them retreat away from her less they suffered more physical pain from her.

"I want both of you to stay at least an arm's length away from me if you're planning to stay here and watch a movie. And absolutely under no circumstances do I want either of your mouths opening to sputter nonsense and annoy me further...Got it?!"

Both of the idols scooted to either ends of the couch, each grabbing a nearby cushion to keep them company and to protect them in case they furthered irritated their off duty manager. Y/N took a deep breath as she rubbed the side of her temples, letting the boys pick out which movie they wanted to watch. She probably wouldn't even enjoy the movie with the two rascals nearby, she thought to herself. Wooyoung and San settled for a cute looking movie, both of them hoping that the fluffy contents would soften up Y/N so they could cuddle up next to her once more. The woman however cringed when she saw the title.

"Ugh. Wake me up when whatever chick flick you chose is over." She settled back onto the couch, her eyes already closing.

"Aww come on Noona, give it a try. You might even like it." San suggested.

"Romantic movies have never been my type." She mumbled out, her hand reaching out to take some of the popcorn on the table to stuff in her mouth.

The movie played out exactly as she expected it to. Nothing short of all the typical cliches and stereotypes portrayed on every single romantic comedy made in existence. The boys would often look back at her every few minutes, their faces getting more and more discouraged when their manager didn't seem to be enjoying their company. It seemed that their plan to get close to her backfired as she was currently resting her chin on her palms, dozing off slowly while not paying one bit of attention on the screen in front of her.

"Told you to pick a scary movie." San complained to his friend.

"Your chicken ass can't even handle them." Wooyoung side eyed him.

"Yeah, but jump scares serve as an excuse to hug the person next to you." He tilted his head over to Y/N.

"Nice move, saying your plan out loud for her to hear. You dumbass."

Taking the pillow he had, San chucked it at Wooyoung, knocking the snacks he was currently eating onto the floor. Grabbing the pillow, he made move to throw it once more, but Y/N held a hand up.

"Throw that cushion and I will choke you Jung Wooyoung."

The warned boy immediately sat the cushion back down, setting his hands down on his lap.

"Please do...."

Y/N's half lidded eyes sprung wide open when she heard his whisper. Slowly she turned her head at him, of course Wooyoung noticed out of the corner of his eye and swallowed harshly. He didn't think she was paying attention enough to hear him, but she was. Wooyoung soon felt flushed as she eyed him with an indiscernible stare, trying desperately to focus his attention on the movie in front of him but the heavy weight of her stare kept burning through him. Seeing as he wasn't going to say or do anything else, Y/N decided it would be fun to tease him like he'd often tease her. Sliding on top of him, to the surprise of not only Wooyoung but his friend on the other side, Y/N hummed softly as her fingers ran up his chest.

"Please do what Wooyoung? Choke you? Is that what you want? Want my hand wrapped around that pretty of neck of yours?"

The flustered male shuddered when her fingers encapsulated over the front of his neck, lightly applying pressure against his Adam's apple with her palm.

"Oh someone likes this a little too much." She chuckled as she subtly rolled her hips on his tent that formed as soon as she touched him.

"Please Noona.." Wooyoung squirmed underneath her body, hips trying to grind up against hers.

"I barely did anything and you're already begging for me. You're an even bigger whore than I thought you were." She let out an annoyed 'tsk' as she slowly began to get off his lap.

When Wooyoung felt her detaching herself, his hands came out to clasp her waist, keeping her firmly planted on his lap.

"Yes I am, I'm such a whore for you Noona. But please don't leave me here like this." He whined at her, looking completely pitiful as his hands desperately tried to keep her from moving. Y/N reached a hand out to toss some of the hair away from his forehead, her mind already working on ways to play around with the young male. Noticing that his eyes kept falling towards her chest, she suddenly got an idea.

"You like my breasts Wooyoungie?"

Her question caught him off guard, eyes widening, looking like a deer caught in headlights, especially after she called him by his nickname. He was beyond flustered, unable to look up at his manager anymore.

"I asked you a question Wooyoungie and I expect an answer or else I'll leave you hanging there and make you watch as I play with Sannie instead."

The forgotten male beside them became excited at hearing her words, his hand rubbing against his inner thigh, slowly creeping up to the bulge in his pants. Tilting his chin up to look at her, Y/N repeated her question once more, expecting him to reply as it was his last chance.

"Y-yes. I like your breasts very much Noona." He finally admitted.

Satisfied at getting an answer, Y/N pulled away from Wooyoung so she could start removing her shirt, both boys watching her without batting an eyelash. When her bra dropped on the floor, they both stared in awe at her voluptuous chest, mouths agape and nearly drooling at the sight.

"Fuck, they're just-wow." San chimed in, tongue wetting the center of his lips.

"You like them too Sannie? I always thought you were more of an ass guy." She commented with a knowing smile, recalling all the times he'd come up behind her and greet her with a pat on her bum.

"Oh hell yeah I am, but I'd never say no to an opportunity to suck on a pretty pair of tits." He acknowledged with no hesitation.

"Is that so? Well then."

Prying Wooyoung's hands off her, Y/N sat herself back in between the boys, hands cupping both of her breasts to gently massage them in her palms, fingers tweaking at her nipples which were slowly getting fully erect. The two men at her sides watched with hungry eyes, only imagining how soft and tender her breasts must feel, both wanting to replace her hands with their own. Unbeknownst to them, they were about to get a better offer.

"There's one for each of you my loves, so go ahead. Put your pretty mouths on them and suck on them. And maybe if you do good enough, I'll play more with you guys."

Wooyoung and San simultaneously looked at one another, both wondering if they heard her correctly or it was another perverted thought their mind played on them. Realizing it was not, San was the first one to be bold as he cupped the breast nearest to him and brought it up to his lips, where he proceeded to coat the areola with spit before he latching onto it.

"So you're more of a dirty boy, aren't you Sannie?" She mused at him, fingers brushing some of the bangs on his face.

San only responded by lifting his eyes momentarily to shoot a wink her way before indulging back in his task of suckling on her tit. Y/N turned her attention to Wooyoung, who was still nervously sitting there in a pliant manner. She beckoned for him to come closer.

"Wooyoungie, my other breast feels lonely."

Getting the hint, Wooyoung lowered himself and practically squished his face into her fleshy mound. As expected, he was very vocal, spewing out lewd sounds as he harshly sucked on her nipple, bringing in as much of her as he could possibly put in his mouth. Y/N laid her head back on the top of the couch, mouth drawing out heavy breaths and pants as she relaxed and enjoyed the sensation of the the younger male's mouths on her breasts, their tongues and teeth eagerly swirling and nibbling on her sensitive flesh. She noticed how both of them had completely different patterns. Whereas San's suckling was less intense, it was definitely more sloppy, spit dribbling down his chin and down her chest from all the insane movements his tongue worked on her nipple, each of them clearly focused on bringing her as much pleasure as possible. Wooyoung was definitely more intense and full of eagerness, but each swirl of his tongue or nibbling on her skin was less meditated and more like he was simply enjoying to taste the older woman, playing around with her breast as if it was a toy for him to fondle and tease as he pleased. Not that she minded, she loved being used as a toy by them both.

She became so lost in the feeling of their mouths on her body that she didn't notice the hands that had traveled in between her thighs until she felt them prying them open in an effort to slide her shorts and underwear down. She became somewhat self conscious when they managed to tear the rest of her clothing off, her legs closing tightly. Tapping a finger on her knee, San pulled off her nipple to say:

"Spread your legs for us and let us see that soaking cunt of yours."

Wooyoung was just as shocked as she was at his informal and vulgar words, but it certainly served to arouse her even more. Getting talked down to by someone younger than her..... it was definitely something. Giving him what he, and probably also his friend, wanted, she opened up her legs. Putting aside her gorgeous breasts for the meantime, the 2 pairs of eyes peered down at the sight below them, their Noona's folds glistening just for them and because of them, her tiny bud aching to be touched by their fingers. Signaling to his friend, San dipped his fingers down, swirling them around her clit before pressing down on it.

"Oh she's needy Wooyoung, I can feel it throbbing against my finger." San smirked as he lightly rubbed against her clit.

"Is our pretty Noona in need of our fingers? Does she want to get stuffed with them?" Wooyoung muttered against her ear, lips quick to muffle the moan that responded to his question. It was a sweet and tender kiss that was interrupted by San who tilted her chin towards him so that he could kiss her as well.

"Don't worry Noona. We'll make sure you're full and satisfied."

Y/N gasped as she felt both of their fingers slowly insert themselves into her slick and wet walls. Nudging to each other, their fingers started moving to and fro, eyes watching closely each facial expression that took over her features, reveling in the blissful sighs that were spilling out of her lips. Y/N couldn't keep herself from clenching tightly around their fingers, mesmerized by the sight of both of them fingering her tight little hole.

"Are you enjoying this Noona? Like having your tight pussy fucked by Sannie's finger and mine?" Wooyoung giggled, pushing his finger deeper into her, knuckles pressing against her mound which had her shuddering.

"Yes she is Wooyoungie, look at how much tighter she's becoming."

With a mischievous twinkle in his eye, he looked at Wooyoung.

"Maybe we should stretch her out even further. Don't you think?" He suggested, to which Wooyoung agreed to with a grin.

With a sharp inhale, Y/N released a whimper when 2 extra fingers intruded into her intimate region, stretching her further. The pace with which they were thrusting their fingers into her increased, each of the boys jamming their fingers at different timings, making sure that their tips touched the hood of her sex, grazing that sweet spot of hers. Y/N was a whining and moaning mess. The boys were not giving her any chance to relax, when one set of fingers was pulling out of her, the other set was pushing back in, continuing its abuse on her g-spot. She felt her thighs starting to trembling, her lower stomach building up her climax by the second. Even with the 4 fingers parting her wide open, she was starting to squeeze around them, wrapping them up in a blanket of heat that would soon coat them with her release.

"Are you gonna cum Noona? Cum on Sannie's and my fingers?" Wooyoung cooed as he drove his fingers faster into her to help her reach her orgasm faster.

Y/N could only manage to nod slightly, eyes shutting tight, unable to register anything else save for the slippery and squealching sounds that came from between her thighs. She didn't feel San press his lips against her ear until his low voice spoke in that sexy satoori accent of his.

"Cum for us Noona. Cum all over us."

With his encouragement, she tipped over the edge, crying out loudly as her release started streaming down her body and onto their hands, dripping even down to their wrists. The boys were kind enough to continue filling her hole with their fingers, helping her ride out her orgasm until she came down from her high.

"Shit. Look at all the mess you made on us. Such a dirty dirty Noona." San taunted as he forced her to look down at their cum covered hands, which they both brought up to lick clean right in front of her.

"And you taste so delicious." Wooyoung added with star struck eyes.

Cupping both of their chins, she placed a peck on each of their lips.

"Thank you for that my darling boys, you made Noona feel amazing. It's only right Noona makes you both feel just as good."

Not forgetting about the throbbing needs in their pants, she ordered them to strip in front of her, an order they were eager to comply with. Through clumsy fumbling, a pile of clothes was added to the previously discarded garments from the woman in front of them. Y/N couldn't hide the satisfaction on her face as she gazed at their erect cocks, standing proudly, waiting to be touched and played with.

"Well I suspected my boys were big, but even the reality is nothing like what I imagined." The men flushed at her words, flattered by the knowledge that she had indeed thought about them in that way before.

"Wooyoungie, lie down right here." She patted the space next to her.

Following her instructions, Wooyoung placed himself where she wanted him, displaying himself out to her. Hovering above him, Y/N kissed along his defined abs, getting dangerously close to the tip of his cock, exciting him while the member behind them envied their close proximity. Y/N pulled her face away right before her lips could touch his head.

"As much as I'd love to suck your pretty little cock, I think there's something you'll enjoy even more babyboy."

The pet name followed by the image of her breasts enveloping his shaft between them was enough to drive Wooyoung wild as he realized what she had in mind.

"Oh fuck Noona- yes please." He was anxious about having her warm tits hug around his length and fuck him until they were coated in his cum.

"I knew you'd love the idea."

Glancing back at the neglected male, Y/N motioned for him to come over.

"And I have an idea for you too my precious Sannie. Since you seem to like my ass so much, how about you stuff that cock of yours in my cheeks and fuck yourself on them?"

San's eyes bulged out, his dick twitching when he heard those words. It was such an erotic, kinky and naughty idea and he was all up for it.

"Shit- fuck yeah." He wasted no time as he straddled Y/N's behind, slapping his cock on each of her asscheeks before prying them apart and laying his shaft in between them.

"Fuck yourself as you want Sannie and try to keep up with Wooyoung and I." She challenged him, which he was more than willing to take up.

Spitting down on Wooyoung's cock and her tits to properly lubricate them, she sandwiched his shaft in her pillowy and soft flesh before rubbing her tits up and down on him. Wooyoung was releasing gasp after gasp the more he felt and saw his member disappear and reappear from his Noona's glorious valley. Meanwhile behind her, San busied himself as he started rutting his cock against the firm but tender skin of her ass, groaning and grunting as he took advantage of the green light she gave him to go as hard as he wanted. Each time he slammed his hips up into her, he basked in the visual of her plump ass cheeks rippling with each of his thrusts.

"Oh God." San exclaimed, one hand coming down to strike one of Y/N's cheeks, causing her to jolt forward in surprise, her stiff nipples rubbing against Wooyoung's shaft.

"Shit! San- be gentle with Noona." He whined, his eyes still focused on the silky sensation of Y/N's boobs hugging him.

"It's ok Wooyoung. I know Noona liked it. She likes it rough. Watch."

Raising his hand once more, it came back down to spank the same spot he had previously hit, a light pink hue starting to appear on her skin. Y/N tried and failed to contain a whimpered moan from her lips, spit dripping out and falling on Wooyoung's tip.

"Shit Noona, are you really into freaky shit?" He asked in astonishment.

"She's literally letting two younger guys fuck her tits and ass, how much more reassurance do you need?" San pointed out as he squeezed at her ass, riding her backside with more intensity.

"She's just a dirty kinky whore, allowing us to use her body this way. And then she's gonna let us cover her in our cum cause she's that slutty."

Y/N groaned at his words, her tongue poking out to lick at Wooyoung's slit each time it peeked out through the valley of her enormous tits.

"Fuck to paint Noona's tits with my cum-" Wooyoung hissed, teeth tugging at his bottom lip.

"You wanna do that for me? Cum on my big boobs baby boy?" She chuckled when she felt Wooyoung's cock twitch against her skin.

He couldn't answer her as another one of San's slaps along with his frenzied grinding thrusted her forward, making her and the boy below her exclaim in surprise.

"You're not cumming without me. You better hold it." San warned through gritted teeth, nails digging into her flesh as he violently rammed his cock between her fleshy and plump folds.

Y/N looked down at poor Wooyoung's face, looking so distraught as he fought hard not to cum right then and there. Leaning down, Y/N gave his tip a few kitten licks before resuming to squish her breasts on his length.

"It's ok Wooyoungie. San forgets his not in charge here. I am. So cum for me baby boy. Cum all over your Noona's tits." She softly said to him.

With shuddering whines and whimpers, Wooyoung threw his head back, eyebrows furrowed as thick streams of cum erupt from his tip, his orgasmic bliss so overwhelming, lasting longer due to Y/N continuing to rapidly push up and down his cock, milking him out of the last drop of cum he had left in his body.

"That's it. That's my good little boy, keep cumming just like that." She praised him, watching with excitement as his seed plastered itself on the top of her cleavage, some of it even splashing onto her cheeks and chin.

"That's so fucking hot- Oh my God-"

After watching the scene play out in front of him, San felt a familiar tightness in his balls, his tip starting to swell up. Before he could even register it, he was already pumping his own cum all over Y/N's ass and lower back, sputtering out incoherent words as he did so. He ended up collapsing on the couch, energy completed drained after all that, same as his friend who was still laying still on the other side. Meanwhile Y/N grabbed the box of tissues that was on the coffee table and pulled a few of them out so she could clean herself and the boys up. Starting with Wooyoung, she wiped in between his thighs, picking up the remainder of whatever was left of his cum before turning to San and cleaning up his body as well. Once both of the boys were cleaned up, she grabbed a couple more tissues to use on herself. She was distracted when she heard both of them start giggling out of nowhere.

"What's so funny?" She asked them, looking at San and then at Wooyoung, both of them donning a suspicious smile.

"So Noona does like younger men..."

[arcyrus]

HI cyrus or colress please if you like ... for quastions 1 9 10 18 maybe <3

oh MAN [cracks knuckles] i am literally going to do answer all of these now i hope you know what can of worms you opened here. putting it under a readmore in case it gets too long LOL

anyways starting with cyrus.

favorite things about the character: genuinely my favorite aspect of him is how much of a fucking hypocrite he is. "get rid of human spirit and denounce emotion" my ass, when he's out here being the most spirited and emotional character in the whole game. the kind of person who thinks he's emotionless or can trick people into thinking that but in actuality feels way too much and Hates it. i want to drown him in lake verity specifically. also i love the entire galaxy / sun / etc aesthetic with him and team galactic (<- biased astrophysicist moment)

9. favorite headcanon: i'm going to use this as an opportunity to talk about why i gave cyrus a volcarona in my au stuff LOL. his parents gave him a larvesta as his first pokemon (quite uncommon and hard to train) and it goes with their high expectations of him... he holds his larvesta to the same standards that he does himself, and pushed it very hard to live up to his parents' expectations - and it ended up evolving quite quickly relative to most volcarona....

10. who do i ship with this character: i crossed the event horizon of accretionshipping too long ago to seriously consider anything else honestly. i have chosen this rarepair as my hill to die on and it is entirely worth it. who cares if cyrus and colress have never interacted in canon and likely never will, it's my city now and i make the rules!!

that being said i do respect cyrus / cynthia as a ship, i like the dichotomy and whatnot but personally i just like them as a very complicated (former) friendship than romantically.

18. what i associate this character with: hooooo boy this is a loaded question. some of it is a bit more towards my particular story stuff that sits in my head but here's some of it:

the sun - easy answer, but true. center of the solar system, incredibly important, yet scorching and unforgiving. there's an icarus / moth too close to the flame parallel i can make here wrt the legendary stuff he gets involved with too

a black hole - this is just an upgrade to the sun theme really and is also because i am biased towards them in the astrophysical sense. but still similar to the sun stuff ultimately just on a bigger scale... a supermassive black hole is at the galactic center and influences the entire galaxy around it even if it's not "active". they do weird things to time and space that are honestly just ridiculous

various pokemon types - dark and flying obviously (seems like the kind of person to wish he could fly), but also fire and dragon. the former tying in with the sun thing, passion, etc, and dragon because legendaries lol

i'm going to stop now for the sake of how long this is getting but let it be known i think about this way too much.

ok colress time

favorite things about the character: somehow colress is genuinely the only fictional character ever to make me experience cuteness aggression. sometimes i draw him and it makes me want to strangle him. anyways my actual favorite thing about him is his complete lack of care for like, anything other than the pursuit of knowledge? to the point of possible apocalypse? i love that he really is gray and is open to all possibilities as answers to whatever questions he has. i don't know he's just really great and i like him.

9. favorite headcanon: colress cynthia lusamine family truther. colress and cynthia are about the same age while lusamine is decently older, so he's actually somewhat closer to his cousin cynthia than his sister lusamine. i like to think that cynthia also has an interest in his primary research question of "how to bring out the power of pokemon" so they bond over strategies for this and whatnot. i've had this headcanon for so long that i've honestly forgotten it's not canon LMAO

10. who do i ship with this character: see above!!! i cant say how much i think about these two honestly its a problem LOL. i'll take this question as an opportunity to say that like with the previous one i understand why people ship antigrav in this case but personally it's not my thing. i like ghetsis but i am too rarepairpilled to ever consider it myself ahaha

18. what do i associate this character with: here we go again!

mercury: this one is entirely based on my own au but i don't care. mercury as both the planet closest to the sun (simultaneously scorched and freezing), and as the liquid element that was used for all sorts of things and poisoned people before they knew what they were dealing with

various pokemon types: steel of course, but also psychic very heavily bc he gets up to more stuff related to this in my au than canon HAHA. ice as well, both because of the kyurem stuff and to contrast cyrus :P

i honestly would have put some more but i need to go leave for a thing now hahaha. i am absolutely always willing to elaborate on any of this at any time

[safertokiss]

Lost in Translation

A/N: Heyyyyy guys...remember when I used to post like every two weeks? Yeesh that’s awkward...but I’m backkkkk woooooooo party time! I was so excited that my discord buddies organized another fic swap because it was so much fun the first time. This time around I was chosen to write a doozy for the wonderful @writing-in-april and I have decided to bless you all with a beautiful subby boy. Sub Spencer lives in my head rent free, no cap. So sit back, relax and pretend it's you getting fricken railed. Peace out girl scouts;)

Pairing: SPENCER x READER

Category: SMUT hehe oh yeah and fluff

Word Count: 4.8k

ENJOY:)

~~~

MASTERLIST

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For as long as she could remember, Y/n had always wanted to learn Russian.

So, naturally, when she found out that their newest case involved two lovers who also happened to be Russian criminals trying to escape the United States government, she simply couldn’t help but jump at the opportunity to become more involved in the investigation. 

It’s not that she’d never been on a stakeout for the Bureau before, in fact she’d probably been on so many at this point that she’d lost count. The only difference that this specific stakeout brought to her life was the fact that it was her first one to have ever been shared with Spencer Reid.

Her and the young doctor had lived in the same apartment building since her first day at the BAU, but their relationship pretty much began and ended at that. Of course they greeted each other whenever they passed in the halls of their building and ricocheted off of each other’s theories whenever necessary during their meetings in the round table room, but it would be a lie to label their relationship as anything other than casual acquaintances as well as amicable coworkers. 

She had never been able to fully get a grasp on the elusive Dr. Reid. The fact that he was already such an integral member of the F.B.I. at the ripe age of 25 astounded and, well to be honest, perplexed her. Not that she doubted his abilities or intelligence in any way, quite the opposite really. She admired how utterly brilliant he proved to be day in and day out, even with the shy exterior he presented himself with to the world. Well, shy was definitely more of an understatement. 

She had never met someone more socially awkward in her entire life, but with that being said, she couldn’t help but find it endearing and pretty dang adorable. Y/n constantly found herself enjoying his pathetic attempts at human interaction on a daily basis. From the nervous stutters to the out of this world hand gestures, there was much for her to dissect about the young doctor. And while she could openly admit that he was quite easy on the eyes, in a boyish-innocent kind of way, she had never really been able to see him in that sort of light.

If she thought his normal social interaction skills were entertaining to witness, his reactions to any of the conversations that took a more raunchy turn were to die for. The speed at which his features would ripen red like a tomato whenever anything of a sexual nature was brought up during cases was truly amazing, impressive even. However, unlike the rest of their team, she knew he wasn’t completely innocent. The walls in their apartment were as good as paper when it came to thickness, so it wasn’t that big surprise that the sounds created within them carried fairly well. 

Or at least that was what she had discovered after the first night she heard him touching himself just through her bedroom wall. 

Yes, it was less than ideal that their bedroom walls just happened to be adjacent to each other, but what could she do about it? It wasn’t as though she never sought out her own pleasure while alone in her apartment...although she would bet money that she was much better at withholding her noises. Instead, she learned to adapt to the sounds from next door and continue on with her life, having accepted that guys will in fact be dudes, no matter how innocent and meek they may appear.

When her boss had explained the nature of the assignment to them, there wasn’t anything of significance that had jumped out at her. It was all pretty standard instruction. They would wait, parked, in a government issued SUV overnight at a location close to the whereabouts of the criminals and simply translate their conversations using the mics that were planted prior. While Hotch knew that Y/n herself couldn’t understand Russian, it was common knowledge that the resident genius easily could transcribe the language.

And that was how she found herself cramped next to Spencer Reid in the stagnant vehicle, pen and paper in hand, patiently waiting for the translations to begin. 

It was almost completely silent inside the car, apart from the quiet whirring of the heat coming through the vents, and she could basically feel the nerves coming off of the man next to her in waves. That’s why she was completely thrown off her game when his timid voice was the first to break through the silence that had encompassed the space they inhabited together.

“So um Y/n..h-how have you been recently?”

She did her best to hide the small smirk that started to form on her face from the stuttering mess that spilled out of his mouth. She definitely didn’t want to make him feel even worse about himself so she decided to humour his adorable attempt at conversation with her...well...sort of.

“Oh ya know Reid, just counting the days until I get some action. How about you?” If she  thought he was sputtering nervously before, that was nothing compared to this treasure.

“Oh um well uh I-I mean...I don-I don’t...uh...w-what was the question a-again?”

This time she couldn’t stop the airy chuckle that escaped her lips as she leaned over and patted him gently on his thigh.

“Relax Reid, I’m just fucking around with you. Well for the most part...I certainly wouldn’t be opposed to some action, but that’s a whole can of worms I am not about to open during a stakeout”, Y/n laughed, not at all missing the steadily spreading blush that coated his sharp features.

“Yeah...no..yeah right of course...I t-totally knew you were just um fu-messing with me! Uh we should probably um r-review our assignment...you know just so we’re all s-set before we start.” How adorable.

“Aye-aye captain Reid. Ok so..”, she muttered while fiddling with the listening device to secure the right frequency. “...we just have to wait until they get back so we’re in range of their conversations. That’s when you’ll have your time to shine and prove yourself as the resident genius once again. And I’m sure that you’re aware that I don’t know a lick of the Russian language so I will be the best damn transcriber for you that the world has ever seen”, she finished with a smirk. 

Even Reid chuckled a bit at her words, the ever-present blush slowly creeping back upon his face and neck. 

“I’ll uh-I’ll hold you to that then.” Y/n had to admit she particularly liked to see the boy smiling, especially when it was the result of her own words. His innocence seemed to call out to her like a siren and she didn’t know how to feel about it.

“Oh-oh there they are! Ok get the pen and paper ready because as soon as they’re in range I’ll start translating.”

Getting themselves situated, they waited the few seconds it took for the couple to get close enough to the vicinity of the SUV for their conversations to begin to be broadcasted through their system.

“Как вы думаете, они идут по нашему следу?”

“Do you think they’re on our trail?”, Spencer easily understands, leaning slightly closer to her so his words were clearly heard.

“Ни за что. У этих глупых американцев нет шансов поймать нас.”

“No way. Those stupid Americans don’t stand a chance at catching us.”

At this point, the couple had already disappeared behind the door at the entrance of their current base, leaving only their words to give the closely listening agents much needed context clues.

“Я когда-нибудь говорил тебе, как сильно мне нравится твоя уверенность?”

“Have I ever told you how much I love your confidence?” 

Even Spencer let himself smile at the chuckle that left Y/n’s lips. “Awww how cute...they’re flirting with each other over mass murder. I strive for that kind of intimacy.”

“Да у тебя есть. Но почему бы тебе не показать мне, насколько тебе это нравится.”

“Yes, you have. But why don’t you show me just how much you love it.”

Uh oh, Y/n thought to herself. Not a second after the untimely thought permeated her brain, the sounds of wet lips sloppily colliding against each other filled the otherwise silent vehicle. After the few seconds of shock wore off, their heads whipped to face each other, eyes wide and mouths wide open. “Huh...well this was certainly an unexpected turn.”

“I uh um-uh well w-what do we do now?”, Tomato Boy nervously sputtered out over the chorus of moans and groans that were currently bouncing off the SUV’s walls. As unexpected as the present situation was, she was absolutely eating up his reaction to the crude sounds.

“Well, Hotch did say he wanted us to take down every single word that was shared between them so...I guess we’re just gonna have to keep moving forward with the translations. You can do that, can’t you Reid?”, she explained, not even attempting to hide the growing smirk on her face.

“Yeah! Yes! Mhmm I can do that, I c-can definitely do t-that.”, he gushed, trying to subtly clear his throat to clear the steadily growing tension in his body.

“Good to hear, Doc.”, she cheekily replied just as the raunchy sounds echoing through the system transitioned to different methods of communication, more legible ones.

“Ты была для меня такой хорошей девочкой. Я думаю, ты заслуживаешь награды.”

Quickly clearing his throat once more, he jumped back into action, with what Y/n noticed was considerably less confidence than before. “You’ve b-been such a good g-girl for me. I think you deserve a r-reward.” Spencer’s voice had noticeably dropped to a whisper by the end of the sentence, forcing Y/n to lean closer to be able to hear his translations, only magnifying the already present tension in the air. 

“Пожалуйста, папа, я сделаю что угодно.”

“P-please daddy.” His voice broke at the end igniting something deep inside Y/n’s being. “I’ll do anything.” In that moment she truly believed he would do anything, his own words or not, based on the obvious strain in his pants that her eyes glanced over, and also by the way his skin completely succumbed to goosebumps as her warm breath caressed the shell of his ear. She didn’t really know what the hell was happening, why her body was absolutely loving the way he gradually leaned into her’s, submitting all of his vulnerabilities into her hands. 

“Тебе это нравится, не так ли, маленькая шлюшка. Как член папы глубоко внутри тебя?”

She watched the way he inhaled a deep breath and released a high-pitched sigh before continuing on, subtly pressing her legs together to control the excitement thrumming through her body at his pathetic tone and mannerisms. 

“You like t-that don’t you, you little-uh-you little s-slut?” From their close proximity, she could clearly make out the speedy heartbeat clambering against his chest as he spoke. And if that was the case, he must’ve been able to feel hers as well. “Like daddy’s c-cock deep inside of y-you?” She could’ve sworn she saw his dick twitch slightly in his pants.

“Маленькая шлюшка уже придет за мной? Тогда умоляйте об этом. Бля, умоляю позволить тебе кончить.”

Y/n certainly did not miss the airy sigh that escaped his lips, watching as a bead of sweat dripped down his temple, confidently guessing it was not from the heat that had been coming through the vents.

“Is the little-little s-slut gonna come for me already? B-beg for it then. Fucking beg f-for me to let you c-come.” Spencer was speedily falling apart at the seams and she was loving it. More than loving it. She was craving it. Craving the little noises that he was trying to stop from escaping his lips. Craving the way he slightly bounced his leg in an attempt to control his arousal, which was futile because it had obviously already reached its full potential in the confines of his khaki slacks. 

“Пожалуйста, папа. Пожалуйста, позволь мне прийти. Мне это надо. Пожалуйста.”

Without even hearing the words translated back to her, she could hear the utter desperation in the girl’s voice. She no longer needed to understand the Russian language to be able to finish the translation, and as she sat there with her thighs tightly pressed together, she knew exactly what it meant.

“Please!” The utter need that was present in the original audio was somehow mirrored perfectly by the young doctor’s breathy voice, his eyes squeezed tightly shut, a prominent vein popping through the skin of his smooth forehead. “Please, p-please, please let me come. I n-need it. Please!”

“Приди за мной, детка.”

Deciding that she could regret her actions in the morning, Y/n quickly grabbed his face before he could translate, angling his head so she could whisper directly into his ear at the same time he spoke the last line of the night.

“Come for me baby.”, they both spoke at the exact same time.

Pulling away as fast as possible, she watched his clamped eyes shoot open as the most obnoxiously loud moan she had ever heard escaped the poor kid, his whole body spasming as a result. And using the large stain on the crotch of his pants as a guide, she was pretty certain she knew what had happened.

For the next few minutes there was silence in the SUV, apart from Spencer’s heavy breathing as he came down of course, leading them to believe the couple had fallen asleep after their...activities. Of course she wanted nothing more than to tease the trembling mess next to her, but she could already tell he was mortified beyond belief because of what happened so she didn’t want to make it any worse for him than it already was. 

After waiting a few extra minutes just to make sure that they had actually gone to sleep, the pair drove away from the stakeout location, Spencer not having said a word since his...big finish. As much as she loved watching him fall apart in front of her, she really didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable around her. 

“Well that was certainly an unexpected turn of events for the night, huh?”, she said, lightly chuckling with the intent of lightening his mood. She was very glad to see it had the intended effect.

“Uh y-yeah...you could definitely say that again.”, he mumbled with the ghost of a smile on his plump lips, though she could still clearly make out the blush coating his features.

“So hey, I know that you usually take the metro, but I’d be more than happy to give you a ride home after we drop the SUV off at the office if you want.”, she warmly smiled in his direction without taking her eyes completely off the road.

“Oh um..yeah that would be perfect. Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it Reid.”

~~~

The rest of the ride back to the office was pretty much spent in silence, but it was much more comfortable than it had been before, which was a huge relief. After dropping the keys to the SUV in the lock box inside, the two agents piled into Y/n’s car to go back home to their shared building. On their way back she considered just asking him if he wanted to ride with her everyday just to make his life a little easier in the long run.

Once they got to the parking lot and exited the vehicle, they began walking towards the entrance together, the awkward tension from before creeping back into the air around them. Soon enough, they found themselves standing in front of their respective doors, both unsure of how they were supposed to end the night’s interactions. After a few moments of painful silence and eye contact, Y/n was the first one to rip off the band-aid.

“So...I guess I’ll see you tomorrow Reid?” He seemed to be broken out of his trance by the sound of her voice, snapping back to attention.

“Huh? Oh yeah uh yes of course. S-see you tomorrow Y/n. Goodnight.” He scampered into his apartment before she could even get a chance to respond to his bidding.

“Goodnight.”, she whispered to no one other than herself as she unlocked her door and headed inside to shower quickly before diving into her soft sheets.

She was sitting up in her bed, book in hand, with only the small glow of her reading lamp illuminating her room when she heard it. Of course she knew immediately what they were, a talent that had developed and strengthened from living adjacent to a pretty much pubescent boy.

The tell-tale sound of moans and groans vibrating right through her wall.

She knew she probably shouldn’t be listening, something about a violation of privacy or whatever, but she just couldn’t help it. He sounded so desperate it was driving her insane. So much in fact that she was in the process of skimming her own hand downwards when she was interrupted by a certain something from the Doc’s room.

“Y/n! Oh god, please. Please.”

Oh. Oh.

Not even giving herself a second to consider her actions, she was up on her feet basically sprinting to his door, pajamas and all. Not even bothering with knocking, she noticed it was unlocked and let herself in, beelining for what she assumed was his bedroom by the increasing volume as she approached it. Standing in his doorframe, she was utterly mesmerized. There he was, sprawled across his sheets, completely bare with sweat coating his hair as he rapidly pumped his angry, red cock, her name tumbling from his lips like a chant.

“You’re so beautiful like this.” She smirked as she watched his head shoot up to where she was standing, his hand immediately stilling it’s rapid movements. Watching the panic spread on his face was intoxicating to her as she slowly approached his bed.

“Y/n! Oh my god, I’m so sorry! I uh-I didn’t um...” His words trailed off and his eyes widened as he watched her slowly begin removing her clothes as she moved closer to him. 

“Shhhhhh.” She managed to remove both her shirt and pajama pants in the short trip over to his bed and she had no intention of stopping there. Now standing directly in front of him, she let her eyes wander over his still frame completely, soaking in the amazement in his dark eyes and the slight tremble that was periodically rippling through his body. Maintaining eye contact with him the whole time, she reached behind her back and unclasped her bra, letting it pool on the floor next to her.

It was honestly shocking his eyes didn’t actually fall onto the floor with how far they bulged out of their sockets, a small moan leaving his mouth. 

She giggled at his enthusiasm before bringing her soft hands up to caress his face gently, his body shuddering at the contact. “Do you want me to keep going baby boy?” Taking a second to process the question that had left her lips, he slowly nodded while looking her in the eyes, his own full of awe. 

Happy with his answer, she reached for the edge of her panties before pushing them down to join the other pieces of clothing already inhabiting his floor. Spencer couldn’t speak. He could barely even breathe. Five minutes ago he had been jerking off to his neighbor, who also happened to be his coworker, and now said neighbor was crawling onto his bed, completely naked, with a wicked smirk on her face.

Straddling his lap, but making sure that there was no actual contact, she reached up to cup his face again, slowly rubbing circles into his defined cheekbone. “Is this ok baby boy? Is this what you want?”, she cooed. 

Spencer looked like he honestly might cry from the pure compassion laced within her words, but still found a way to nervously nod his head in affirmation of her questions. With a warm smile on her face, she leaned forward and placed a feather-light kiss on his lower jaw before continuing up the side of his face, basking in the small whimpers that fell from his pretty lips. Finally reaching his ear, she let her warm breath tease him before proceeding. 

“Do you want me to take control of you? Is that what you want sweet boy?” While the whine that immediately escaped him was answer enough, she pulled back searching for a more concrete answer to her question. “Hmmmm, you’d like that?” 

“Yes.”, he whispered, nodding his head anxiously. 

While he was answering she had leaned back towards his face, placing soft kisses all over. “As you wish baby boy.”, she whispered, changing course to attack his neck with her eager lips as soon the words left her mouth. Spencer gasped instantly and she couldn’t help but smirk against his pale flesh, increasing the pressure in which she was assaulting his neck.

Through the groans that spilled past his lips, she was able to make out his pathetic attempt at words, not slowing down her lips at all. “J-just make sure not to leave any m-marks. We’ll g-get in trouble at w-work.” Of course Spencer would be the only person on the planet to remember their office guidelines while getting his neck sucked like a vampire.

“No marks...that’ll be difficult. I want everyone to know just how thoroughly I fucked you.”

Feeling extremely satisfied by his enthusiastic response to her vulgar words, she slowly lowered herself down his body, pausing with her mouth right above his groin. Somehow the poor kid already looked completely fucked out and she hadn’t even done anything yet. Hearing him wince as she gently grasped and started stroking his cock, she knew this was gonna be fun.

Staring directly into her eyes, he watched the string of spit leave her mouth and drip directly onto his dick, eyes bulging at her bold actions, still in shock that any of this was actually happening. 

Entranced by the way his chest expanded rapidly as he watched her curiously, she leaned forward and licked the tip, his head falling back onto the pillow behind him. “I’m gonna suck your cock...but only because I want to see if you can not be a spaz about getting head from me.” Her words made Spencer whimper and she smirked as she took him fully into her mouth, soaking in his pretty noises. 

Y/n had only been going for a minute or two when she heard his groans get louder and felt him twitch in her mouth. Pulling off of him with a pop, she hummed at the sight of the completely wrecked boy in front of her, panting and shaking adorably. It wasn’t long before the perfect idea infiltrated her head, her body thrumming with anticipation and excitement.

“You’ve been such a good boy for me. I think you deserve a reward.”, she smirked, reciting the words that they had heard verbatim. Seemingly catching on to what she was pushing for, he responded accordingly.

“Please Y/n. I’ll do anything.”

She quirked her eyebrow in his direction questioningly, slowly grinding her dripping core against his achingly hard cock. “Anything, baby boy?”

Snapping his heated stare directly to her eyes, he cracked a beautiful smile. “Anything.”

She couldn’t control the grin that overtook her lips as she lowered herself down onto his erection, writhing in pleasure at the feel of him inside of her and the sound of his wanton moans. “Good boy.” 

Wanting to give Spencer time to fully adjust and control himself, she started her movements out slow, lifting herself up until only his tip remained inside before dropping down completely into his lap repeatedly. He was a moaning mess on the sheets below her, sweat coating his body along with goosebumps covering every visible expanse of his skin as he panted like a dog. He was so fucking pretty like this. 

Deciding enough was enough, she picked up the pace considerably, bouncing like a mad woman on his dick, while her sharp nails scratched down his creamy, pale chest in front of her, leaving angry, red streaks in their wake. Spencer had devolved into a blubbering mess underneath her and that lit her soul on fire.

“You like that don’t you, you little slut? Like your cock deep inside of me? Huh?” 

Y/n was pretty sure that he was short circuiting below her, his brain cutting off all control over his body as he spasmed uncontrollably and moaned for the entire fucking building to hear. Good, she thought. Let them hear how whipped he was for her. Even though it had only been a few minutes since she increased her speed, she could feel his cock starting to twitch violently inside of her and she knew he was close, really close.

“Is the little slut gonna come for me already?” All he could do was whimper in response, having to nod his head emphatically due to his loss of speech.

“Beg for it then. Fucking beg for me to let you come!” She was on fucking cloud nine right now, floating through the motions, as his whimpers increased in volume and speed. Mustering up all the strength he could, he spit out as many audible words as possible.

“Please! Please, please, please let me come! I need it! Please!” He was crying now, tears rapidly pouring from his eyes and spilling down his cheeks out of sheer desperation and need to release the tension built up within his body.

She was in awe of him. As she watched the tears pour down his face, she couldn’t help but whimper too. Desperately needing to finish, herself, she brought one hand down to make circles around her clit, while the other she brought up to wrap gently around his flushed throat, leaning over to whisper in his ear like she had earlier that night.

“Come for me, baby.”

She once again pulled back to witness his reactions to her hushed words, the outcome only more amazing than before. She watched as his eyes rolled back as far they could possibly go into his head as his mouth dropped open in pure ecstasy, high-pitched whines escaping his lips, his release shooting up into her like it had always belonged there. Maybe it had.

Watching him come undone below her, combined with her hand speedily rubbing circles on her clit, she was catapulted into the most amazing climax of her entire life, her body buzzing with excitement as she tightened around him and collapsed on his chest, weak as could be after that activity.

The pair laid silently, apart from the heaving breaths whirring through the room, still in shock over what had just transpired minutes before. Slowly shifting her eyes to the shivering boy below her, she saw he was caught in a trance, his eyes dazed, a soft grin on his lips. 

Breaking him from his stupor, she gently cupped his cheek with one hand as the other drew lazy circles on his blotchy chest. Rubbing the skin on his face lightly, she leaned forward and kissed his nose, making him scrunch it up and giggle as a result. “Such a sweet boy for me. Such a sweet, sweet boy.” Her words made him melt inside and words tumbled out of his own mouth before he could even think about stopping them.

“Вы красивы внутри и снаружи.”

She looked up at him in shock, before breaking out in giggles. “Did you just serenade me in Russian? How romantic.”, she giggled, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

He couldn’t seem to control his giggles either, a fact that warmed her heart. “Yes, I suppose I did.”

Smiling up at the adorable boy she just had to ask. “What does it mean?”

Y/n watched as his signature blush quickly coated his features once again as he looked down at her with a shy smile. “You are beautiful, inside and out.”

With the warmest grin she could muster, she leaned up and kissed his jaw once more before snuggling up against the young doctor who had melted her heart.

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