#that's the one section that could include a lot of high-profile names

[clove-pinks]

I want to be an 1830s gentleman.

I will spell trousers as trowsers and use degrees farenheit. I will watch celebrated actors like Mr. Charles Mathews and Madame Vestris at the Olympic Theatre and the Royal Gardens Vauxhall. I'll have oysters and French dishes at an eating house and try not to die of cholera. I would go to grog shops every night and take the steam packet to Calais. I am also more likely to meet Washington Irving, George Cruikshank, Captain Marryat and William IV.

I wish I was an 1830s gentleman. :(

(the original)

[idk-i-want-mcl-content]

describing my MCL profile (with @mclmora's template :D)

hi! as you can guess I'm yet again thinking about MCL, as one does, and I thought filling this template could be fun :3 📸 user's profile + favorite outfits

💗 name: ?

💗 b-day: 08/12

💗 zodiac sign(s): Saggitarius Sun, Scorpio Moon.

💗 nationality: Salvadorian.

💗 favorite flirt(s): Lysander, Armin and Nathaniel.

💗 player since: 19/12/2015

🎮 Currently playing → Episode 32: Happy Life, Double Life! (Armin's route); Episode 29: The Love of Art (Lysander's route)

💘 lom meters (US server)

nathaniel, 95%

castiel, -52%

lysander, 95%

armin, 75% (💘)

kentin, 35%

❔answering questions: - which club did you pick? I picked the gardening club, because even though in real life I cannot take care of a plant for the life of me (i've tried) i'm even less... skilled, in sports lol. Don't get me wrong I think both things are fun but it's just not my thing.

headcanon time: My Candy signed up for the gardening club, befriended Jade (and had a crush on him at the start of the year) and because she was more a danger than anything in the garden (shenanigans ensue) , she ended up switching clubs, then became representative of her class (I imagine the high school has a lot of students, she's from a different section than the other characters on the first year.) and that's how she ended up befriending Melody and Nath. In the second year, Jade switches schools :c he was one of her best friends there.

-which is your favorite ep?

oh, don't ask me that :") I'll better give you a list in NO specific order because I really, REALLY can't choose: 17 (bye Debrah), 21 (the play!!!), 23 (nath's house), 31 and 32 (lysander's arc), 33 (iris party) and 40 the finale of course! - which non-datable character you like the most?

Priya wasn't datable in HSL so her lol, also Jade and Dajan are really cool in my mind, even thought they appear in only two episodes for some reason I always include them in my headcanons. Mmm, this is hard lol because I like a lot of characters from different reasons and it's hard to compare them to each other yk. Like, objectively we may feel more inclined to say Rosa or Alexy, but that's because we know them really well. But then there's Iris best girl for example, Leigh is also really nice. And then I have fanon versions of Melody and Karla that, in my mind, make me like them more...

It's tough man, but being honest, probably Amber because yes in HSL she was a BULLY I think, as a character, I really like her, she's compelling to me.

👩🏽‍🎓univerity life: to start

❔answering questions:

-what do you think of the removal of kentin, armin and lysandre?

because I have had a lot of time to reflect on this, and now we have alternative life and everything, I think it doesn't hit me as much as it did when I saw the news the first time. Of course it's still sad, because reading all the amazing headcanons people have for these three LIs for that season really makes me wish they did something different but hey! I think the new routes weren't as bad as people make them to be, because they constantly like to compare the new v.s. the old routes and that's not the point. The point is for people to have fun, and i've seen fanarts, fanfics and blogs dedicated to Hyun, Rayan and Priya :D also, adding Priya as a love interest IN MY OPINION was a really nice choice, a lot of people liked her before and now being able to date her??? queen, just give me the ring.

-which one is your favorite episode?

I haven't played this season myself, but i've watched the playthrough of it on YT (planetsucrette te adoro) and honestly? episode 15 "Emotional Rollercoaster" HAS to be at least in my top three for this season, yes i'm a nathaniel girlie but idk, all the drama and the build up and the illu!!! ugh it's so good, I really enjoyed watching it and I cannot imagine finishing that episode and have to WAIT for the continuation!!! the intrigue!!!

Also Rosa's story reaaally pulled my heart strings, i'm going to be honest with you, and there's a scene where Candy has this memory box and there's a bunch of photos from High School, and there's one with them and Alexy and the way they narrate that part is just- is fantastic, I loved it a lot. I think it's on ep 11.

-is there something you don't like about this season?

uh... well, for the longest time, I didn't even wanted to know what it was about, mainly because my interest remained in HSL and the fact that 2/3 of my boys weren't even there was not motivation, at all. There's nothing at the top of my head that I have to critique in general. Maybe if I gave it a little bit more thought, but eh, not in the mood.

💎 alternate life

lysander: (1st episode)

questions for you ♡

how do you feel about his new design?

i'm in love with his new design, not even going to lie to you. literal heart eyes every time i see him 💗💗💗💗💗

what do you think of his character development?

mmm... i think i said somewhere else in the SEA of post I have rambling about this game lol but, I agree with the sentiment that they could have took a different approach to his story in general. He's still charming, of course, but i'm completely biased in that.

non-datable characters that I love

yes the whole HSL cast. i don't care. they forever will live free in my mind.

general questions ♡

-how did you discover the game?

thanks to a friend who really liked anime :) she was my best friend at the time but I ended up falling in love with the game thanks to roleplaying with two of my best friends in the world + my new bestie because the other one switched schools lol. Now that I think about it, I don't know what her route was xd

Random fact: Those two friends I mentioned? They are both in love with Lysander and are always telling me they are going to steal him from me JAJAJAJA. All of us are head over heels for Armin though. One of them is Kentin's route and Castiel's route (yes, the complete opposites lol) and the other one loves Castiel TO DEATH. Also, my IRL bestie is also Castiel route and uh, quick question: Why does EVERYONE I know love Castiel while the dude literally hates ME? I'm saying like, in every damn account he always manages to be my LOWEST lom. Wanna know why? because I always befriend Nath.

-which one is your favorite special episode (ex: halloween 2011, easter 2012, ect)?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH NOOOOO DON'T DO THIS!!!!! but-

I have fond memories of playing the Valentine's 2018 event, it was the last one :"""") (i think). Why do I remember you ask? Because I did screamed when I saw this illu for the first time:

look at my boys. LOOK AT THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-have you played the spin-offs? if yes, which one was your favorite?

sadly no :c i'm short on AP yk, I'm a free to play girlie till the day I die.

💗 the end?

and that's the end :))) If you've read any part of this uh, thank u??? I started writing this tag as a fun silly activity but I ended up getting invested and thinking more about my silly AU. Also, you may have noticed I just call my candy "Candy" and that's not because they don't have names, but the reason is because they are my real names and I don't feel comfortable sharing them online!

I've tried to search for synonyms of my names to use for them, but they just don't feel like me and at the end of the day, My Candy Love is supposed to be played from your perspective and so, yes my candys have different personalities and dynamics with the characters but idk, they are based around me and so giving them other names doesn't really work for me??? it's a matter of preferences I guess.

i'm really fond of this game, but it's a part of me that i only get to talk openly about here on tumblr or with those 2-3 friends, so writing all of this was a sweet experience.

[catovyen]

I have uploaded this on twitter, but this has more explanation of their lore!

I have an idea to include more composers in the Rhythm Heaven universe! They already included Bach, why not make the others exist there too? I named this section of Rhythm Heaven: CLASSICAL

Bach is the father figure of the stepswitchers. His main outfit color is pink, he could change it to blue and green as he desires (usually to match with the stepswitchers wen they're performing). Bach hates it when someone was being out of time (being late or too fast).

His hobby is walking around Rhythm Heaven, playing the church organ, harpsichord or performing a music duel (mostly with Maestro Dvorak).

Maestro Dvorak is a music and train conductor, he is known as the Conductor by most Rhythm Heaven civilians. He's the father of Cosmic girl—Dvorak delivers Cosmic, her friends and crewmates (cosmic dancers) to their performance using his train.

Dvorak wishes that his music was well-known and a lot of people recognizes it—he likes fame but he rather have his life to be private. He is familiar with the legend of Q Maou—A person may ask one wish, but he will give a downside. Q Maou has granted his wish, with a downside: if he conducts his 9th Symphony the 2nd movement, he'll vanish from existence. He kept this event to himself and never has spoken about it to anyone.

He has a favorite instrument to play and listen to, which is the viola. He founds the viola to have the perfect sound of the pitch, not too high like the violin, and not too low like the cello.

He duels a lot with Bach for fun. But it would be too dangerous if they did it too often, their music is able destroy Rhythm Heaven itself.

He's known as Beethoven, but he prefers to be called as Ludwig. He used to study Bach's pieces. He keeps moving from one apartment to another when the room is too messy to tidy up—till he moved to Rhythm Heaven to tutor students. Ludwig is able to teach how to play the organ, piano, guitar, and the violin.

He started to lose his hearing due to an unknown reasoning. Due to this, he had to stop teaching students and start his new path on becoming a music composer. He then left Rhythm Heaven to find somewhere where others aren't able to bother him

Ludwig is JJ Rocker's former mentor—ever since he left Rhythm Heaven, he keeps on update with JJ's fame through the papers.

He was often being made fun of by the other composers due to his height, such as offering him to sit on a baby chair as a joke.

Peter lives in a village on the north part of Rhythm Heaven. He's a fond of Maestro Dvorak, both of them enjoys each other's music pieces.

Mushroom hunting was a part of his culture and he loves it. His serotonin rose through the roof whenever he sees a colony of mushroom.

He also loves gardening! His favorite flower is lilies of the valley. When he finished taking care of his plants, he would make himself a cup of chai tea to relax.

He's shy talking to new people, he also hates it when someone records his voice. He hates listening to his own voice because he thinks that his voice is bad.

Peter hated Brahms' pieces and envied him due to his success and popularity. He always receives sour criticism from Brahms, Peter even calls him a "giftless bastard". Brahms never cared for Peter's pieces, he fell asleep on one of his premieres. Occasionally, Pirate Captain Jackie borrowed Peter's cannons without his permission and uses it for fun. He is concerned about her behavior since she's just a kid, she shouldn't be using cannons and going on an adventure without a guardian.

--------------

Thank you for reading this far! Note that some of the information aren't accurate to their real profiles.

[crystalgood]

When it comes to special occasions, often the main course of a meal is the star of show. Beef is one crowd-pleasing favorite that everyone likes, but when you want the best cut of beef, two options may come to mind — beef tenderloin vs filet mignon. Both are classic red meat cuts that offer rich flavor and juicy texture. But which one should you choose for your next gathering? Read on as we compare these popular steak cuts side-by-side and explore which will make an better addition to your gourmet menu. Beef tenderloin and filet mignon are two of the most popular beef cuts. They are both considered a pricier cut of steak, making them ideal for special occasions.  These cuts are usually leaner than other steaks, and they can be cooked more quickly without sacrificing flavor. They can be roasted, pan-fried or grilled. [caption id="attachment_2178" align="aligncenter" width="1024"] Beef Tenderloin Vs Filet Mignon[/caption] What Is Tenderloin? Beef tenderloin is one of the most expensive cuts of beef that is also incredibly tender. It is a lean cut with comparatively little intramuscular fat, which is known in culinary terms as marbling. It’s a cut that comes from the loin of the cow near the backbone and stretches between the sirloin and top sirloin. The tenderloin is a long muscle that’s a lot less exercised than the larger round, rib, and chuck cuts of beef. The tenderloin is usually trimmed of excess fat and a layer of silver skin before it’s sold. This is a very important step, since it helps keep the meat tender and tasty. Tenderloin can be used for a variety of recipes, such as roasts or steaks. It can also be sliced into medallions for beef burgers or even used in barbecue sauce. There is a narrow end called the “tail,” and a thick end known as the “muscle on roast.” These two sections can be separated and trussed with butcher’s twine to make uniform roasts or thin slices for filet mignon, tenderloin steaks, and chateaubriand. A whole tenderloin will also have a chain attached to it, which is a muscle that runs along the length of the tenderloin. Tenderloin Nutrition Fact: When it comes to meaty steaks, tenderloin is the king of the hill. This beefy cut is also a good source of protein, which is crucial for your body’s cell and tissue maintenance. The nutritional facts of beef tenderloin include a plethora of vitamin B12, a well-rounded fatty acids profile and a solid dose of umami, the savory chemistry that creates that satisfying beefy taste you’ve been yearning for. It is no secret that red meat can increase your risk of heart disease, so it’s best to limit it. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the occasional piece of filet mignon in moderation. Despite its reputation for being a high-calorie food, a 4-ounce serving of filet mignon only has 136 calories, 0 grams of carbs and 23.3 grams of protein. Fortunately, there are plenty of lower-calorie ways to enjoy this meaty star in the kitchen. Pair a serving of this hefty cut with some veggies and you’ve got the makings for a meal that could help you shed a few pounds while keeping your heart healthy. What Is Filet Mignon? Filet mignon is a steak cut of beef taken from the small end of the tenderloin, or psoas major, which is found inside the rib cage of a cow. It has many names across Europe, including filet de boeuf (French), fillet steak (UK), solomillo in Spanish, and oxfile in Swedish. Filet is a very tender cut of meat. It’s one of the most coveted cuts of meat, and it’s also one of the easiest to cook. The psoas major muscle is not weight-bearing and thus does not get toughened by exercise, resulting in incredibly tender steaks. It’s a delicate, refined cut of meat that tastes milder and sweeter than other cuts of beef. It also has a soft texture, adding a buttery sensation to each bite. A standard filet mignon size is 8 ounces, and it’s usually between 1.5 and 2 inches thick. This thickness is ideal for cooking to medium rare without overcooking the interior.

It’s best cooked using a dry high-heat method, such as broiling or grilling. Once done, let the steak rest for a few minutes to allow the juices to redistribute. Filet Mignon Nutrition Fact: Filet mignon is one of the most popular steak cuts, and it has a variety of nutritional benefits. This cut contains plenty of protein, B vitamins and iron – all important for good health. It’s also low in fat, and it can be a great choice for people who are watching their calorie intake or following a diet that limits saturated fat. It’s also a good source of zinc, an essential mineral that promotes wound healing and immune system function. Another benefit of eating this cut is that it is high in iron, which is necessary for carrying oxygenated blood throughout the body. A deficiency can cause a wide range of symptoms, including weakness, fatigue and loss of appetite. Filet mignon is also a good source of vitamin B-12, which promotes red blood cell production and neurological functions. This nutrient helps maintain energy levels and is necessary for brain development and immunity. Difference Between Tenderloin & Filet Mignon: There are many people who get confused between the two terms tenderloin and filet mignon. The truth is that they are actually very different cuts of meat. While both are lean boneless cuts of beef, they are not the same. Tenderloin is a more economical cut that requires less trimming, while filet mignon is more expensive and has a delicate texture. Tenderloin can be cooked as a whole and then sliced into medallions, or it can be cut into small pieces and served as individual steaks. It is one of the pricier cuts on restaurant menus, but it is still quite affordable for most home cooks. Filet mignon is another expensive cut of beef that is considered one of the most delicious steaks available. It is more tender than tenderloin and goes well with various types of sauces. Both of these cuts of beef are lean, which means they have very low calories and a high protein content. They also pair well with simple sides like roasted potatoes or grilled vegetables. They are both great choices for anyone looking to lose weight and build muscle mass. Tenderloin vs Filet Mignon – Which Is Better? Beef tenderloin and filet mignon are both popular steak cuts that have a unique taste and texture. They are both high in protein and rich in essential vitamins and minerals like Iron, Zinc, B12, Phosphorus and Copper. Tenderloin is an incredibly tender cut of beef, made from the front (loin end) part of the cow’s tenderloin muscle. It is a lean cut with minimal marbling and connective tissue, which makes it an ideal choice for people who are looking for a low-fat meat option. The tenderloin can be cooked quickly over high heat to keep its juicy flavor and texture intact. Ideally, it should be roasted, grilled or pan-fried so that the exterior is nicely browned and the interior medium-rare. The tenderloin is one of the most popular cuts of beef, so you can find it at your local grocery store or butcher shop. It can be purchased as whole roasts or as individual filet mignon or T-bone steaks. You may also be able to find it at a specialty butcher or steakhouse. How To Choose Tenderloin vs Filet Mignon? Tenderloin and filet mignon are two of the most popular steak cuts on the market. They’re both tender and juicy, and they take well to many different sauces, seasonings, and marinades. They’re also great for entertaining, and they’re both delicious options for a special meal. Tenderloin is a large cut of beef that can be roasted whole, or sliced into steaks or cubes. It can also be sauteed, braised, grilled, or smoked. Its flavor and texture are excellent, and it’s a good choice for barbecues since it has less fat. However, it’s not the best choice for a high-quality steak, and it isn’t as tender as other cuts of beef. Filet mignon is another of the most popular steak cuts, and it’s an excellent choice for barbecues and upscale restaurants.

It’s tender, juicy, and has a very delicate beefy flavor that takes well to many different sauces, dressings, and marinades. Conclusion: Beef tenderloin and filet mignon are both tasty cuts of beef that make for perfect special occasion meals. However, there are some differences between these two cuts of meat that you should know before purchasing. The first important difference is that tenderloin is a lean cut of beef and filet mignon is a thicker cut. As a result, it tends to be a bit more expensive than tenderloin. Another key factor affecting filet mignon price is the quality of the cut itself. The USDA grades beef based on quality, and if you buy a lower-quality filet, you will be paying more for it. Buying beef is a very personal decision, and it's important to choose the best cuts of meat for your family. A good rule of thumb is to purchase the highest grade available, which the USDA labels as “prime.”

[hologramcowboy]

I’m not sure which PR fluff piece is worse- the new People article or the US Weekly relationship timeline one. I still can’t get over the fact that they called Danneel an activist, tried to do a section on it, and couldn’t come up with more than four examples. And what’s worse is they were terrible examples. Reposting a resource guide someone else made on Instagram, posting her children in target pride merch (at the end of pride month), a fundraiser the Ackles helped host in 2018, and the one time Jensen teamed up with Jared to talk about mental health. One example had nothing to do with her (Jared’s mental health advocacy efforts), another isn’t activism by any stretch of the imagination (her family pride merch photo), and the only truly charitable effort on the list happened four years ago. They just shouldn’t have included activism at all, it just made her look shallow and uninvolved.

What was really telling however is that they tried to pass off that Jensen and Danneel not only still live in Texas, but are still living in the house from their AD. The GA might buy that, but anyone who is already a fan of Jensen’s knows that they sold that house years ago. What an odd thing to lie about. Very sketchy, and another little tidbit to file under evidence that they’re no longer living together.

I’m just curious as to why they’re paying for these articles, if the CW is bankrolling them and not Danneel that is. At this point, they’ll have spent more on promoting the Ackles and The Winchesters than the show will make them. What a poor investment. If Danneel is the one bankrolling them in an attempt to get her name out in the public again, she’s going about it all wrong. No one is going to believe the story of high achieving husband and wife producer duo if the couple in question has only one project in the works that has been doomed from the start and the other half of the duo hadn’t worked in years and didn’t have a promising career when she was active. No one is going to believe that they’re in love when they’re never seen together in public and when they look like strangers at best and like they hate each other at worst in pictures together.

You make some excellent points, Anon. I wonder if maybe the Texas house bit was just another error of the writer or if it was purposeful. It seems to be purposeful since the article was trying to push them as a certain type of couple. I doubt the studios have any interest in promoting Danneel, they could make an attempt at gaining her some credibility but this is now the way to go about it. She's no activist and it's ridiculous people call her that when she does ZERO work, it's delusional, all she does is post from her couch and she has no intelect to back up any remotely intelligent ideas that would benefit the world. She's just a privileged white woman ego tripping, nothing more and it's sad that People magazine did no research into her 'activism' 'background'. Danneel herself is ridiculous for claiming such title. As if activism was just a fashion fad.

You're right, no one is going to buy into what her team is trying to sell because there is no credibility on any of it. GA might fall for some of it but with a little research they will get the truth.

Judging by the amateurish writing of these articles I am inclined to believe they were ordered by someone who has no clue what they are doing and just has a desire to get out there, so I am inclined to believe Danneel paid for those articles. Whatever the truth is, it's clear they were paid for to increase her profile so it's obvious the Ackles realize how shady her profile is and that she needs credibility to be sold as a producer successfully.

This feels a lot like she's trying to get some press in before TW fails. lol What a pathetic way to go about it.

[shemarmooresfedora]

Rebuilding Family

Summary: Y/N and Spencer were college sweethearts at Cal-Tech but once Spencer got accepted to the FBI Academy, he ended things deciding it was not fair to make Y/N wait for him. When they meet again years later, he discovers something unexpected.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

A/N: i hit 200 followers!! as celebration, i put out a list of 40 prompts and you can send me an ask with up to three and i will write a one-shot including them! i have already received one request and i’m already in the process of writing it but i would love to write more!

Masterlist

Chapter 23

You inhaled sharply as you sat up in the hospital bed. Spencer looked at you, concerned.

“The doctor gave you the option to stay here for one more night. Are you sure you want to be discharged today?” Spencer asked.

“I need to go home. It’s so boring here. I’ll heal quicker at home, I promise,” you whined.

“Scientifically, that’s not possible but fine. Don’t think for a second that I’m going against the doctor’s orders though. Bed rest for a week,” Spencer brushed the stray hairs off your face and placed a gentle kiss on your forehead.

“You’re no fun,” you pouted as he helped you into the wheelchair.

“I think Jo and Penelope have a little surprise for you waiting at home that will cheer you up,” Spencer smiled.

-

Spencer insisted on carrying you bridal-style through the front door because you couldn’t walk up the steps.

“We’re not officially married yet,” you teased.

“Oh hush, I’d keep you in my arms forever if I could,” he pulled you closer to his chest.

You snuggled into his cardigan that smelled like an old bookstore, “I guess I wouldn’t mind that either.”

Spencer slowly put you down and opened the door to your bedroom. Technically, it was you and Spencer’s shared bedroom now because he hardly ever used his bedroom now other than as storage for his things. Most of his clothes had already migrated to your closet and one of your bedside tables now had piles of books, a journal with chicken scratch, and his reading glasses atop it.

Inside, you saw Jo and Penelope holding heart balloons that said “Get Well Soon!” and a big teddy bear.

“Awww, thank you, my lovelies,” you smiled.

“I brought the mini fridge from my office so you are fully stocked with waters, juice, ice cream, fruit, whatever your little heart desires,” Penelope chirped.

“Thank you, Pen. You didn’t have to do that. I feel bad now. Where are you going to put your lunch?”

“Nonsense, my dear! There’s a fridge in the break room I can use. Don’t worry about me,” she assured you.

“And I made you drawings, Mommy,” Jo gestured to the walls of the room covered in colorful crayon sketches of animals, dinosaurs, trees, and people.

“Oh my god, these are so gorgeous, Jo! They are definitely going to help me get better, thank you.”

Jo hopped up on the bed to give you a hug.

“You’re welcome, Mommy,” she said as you planted a kiss on her head.

“Alright, I’m going to head out. Let me know if there’s anything I or anyone else at the BAU can do, literally anything, you just name it,” Penelope stated.

“Bye, Pen. Thank you so much,” you waved.

“Do you want soup? Spring rolls? Tea? What can I do for you, love?” Spencer eagerly asked.

“Could you please see if we have the ingredients for a cake for a special little 7 year-old?” you grinned.

“One cake, coming right up,” Spencer nodded, “Jo, do you want to help or stay with Mommy?”

“Stay with Mommy,” Jo grabbed the TV remote and curled into your side.

“Can you handle it?” you asked hesitantly, knowing baking wasn’t really Spencer’s forte.

“I will try my best,” he smiled, “And if not, I will go to the store.”

-

An hour later, Spencer opened the bedroom door, holding a chocolate cake with purple candles. He looked absolutely adorable, he was wearing your sunflower apron and he had flour residue on his nose.

“As promised,” he smiled, setting the cake down.

Jo was practically drooling as the cake was set in front of her.

“Hold on, I need to get plates and forks!” Spencer rushed out of the room and down the stairs.

“You better hurry. Jo looks like she is ready to just start eating it with her hands,” you laughed.

-

A week later, you woke up super early and jumped out of bed, dancing around a little in Spencer’s sweater, your PJ shorts, and fuzzy socks.

“Bed rest is over!” you cheered quietly to yourself, going downstairs to make banana bread.

Spencer came down fifteen minutes later as you were dancing around the kitchen to your music and whisking the batter.

“Bed rest is over,” you beamed as he came up behind you, tucking his chin into your neck and squeezing you softly, leaving a kiss as he pulled away.

“I love you,” he grinned.

“And I love you too...Spence, I was thinking…” you turned to face him after you put the pan in the oven.

“About what?” he asked, leaning against the kitchen counter with his mug of coffee.

“I don’t want to wait any longer. Can we please get married already?” you asked.

“Like now now?” he smiled softly.

“Like as soon as we can but still having a small ceremony so our friends and family don’t kill us for eloping,” you placed your hands on his chest.

“JJ and Will had their wedding in Rossi’s backyard,” Spencer suggested.

“Penelope did say if we needed anything, just ask,” you grinned.

Spencer already had his phone out of his pocket before you could say anything else. He dialed Rossi and put it on speaker.

“Reid, to what do I owe this pleasure on a lovely Tuesday morning,” Rossi spoke through the phone.

“Hey, Rossi. Y/N and I kind of have a big favor to ask,” Spencer began.

“Name it.”

-

Everything was a whirlwind after that. You decided Saturday evening would be best for the wedding so you and Spencer had exactly five days to coordinate your wedding.

Luckily, the team took care of most of the planning like the caterer and the set-up of Rossi’s backyard but you and Spencer’s opinions were still needed for everything from which flowers you wanted in your bouquet to what flavor of cake.

You and Spencer sat in bed one night criss-cross across from each other and you each had a little journal and pen in your hand. You both wrote your vows over the next hour. Spencer would occasionally look up at you, stare for a minute, silently smiling, and then continue jotting something down.

Spencer pushed up his glasses on the bridge of his nose and leaned over your journal.

“No peeking!” you rolled on your back, flailing your legs so he couldn’t get to your journal.

“Ugh fine, I surrender,” he laughed, grabbing on to your legs to stop your movements, “I guess I can wait 3 more days.”

He leaned down to kiss you.

“3 more days,” you repeated with a dreamy smile.

-

You and Jo met the BAU ladies at a boutique to get dresses for everyone. You had decided on a dusty blue for the bridesmaid dress color but you let them choose which style they wanted so everyone was matching but still got to decide which dress they liked best.

Jo was essentially given free rein in the children’s section of the store and chose a pale pink dress with a bow on the back that would serve as her flower girl dress.

After all that was settled, everyone gathered on the couch near the fitting room to watch you try on dresses, you had been saying from the start that you just wanted something simple. All the options in the store were overwhelming to you but the girls insisted you at least try on a little of everything to get a feel for it.

You came out in a huge poofy wedding dress courtesy of Penelope.

Jo burst out in giggles, “Mommy looks like a cupcake.”

“I think anything overly poofy is ruled out. I want to be able to pee without the help of 3 bridesmaids,” you walked back into the fitting room.

Next was a gown with lots of detailed beading and lace and a long train.

“I think it’s too much,” you sighed, “Plus, I don’t want to trip on this train while walking down the aisle,” you returned to the stall.

You walked out of the dressing room once more and everyone gasped.

“Oh my god,” Penelope was fanning her face to dry the fast-forming tears.

“Y/N, I don’t want to speak for you but I think this is the one,” JJ smiled.

The dress you were wearing was a white satin gown. It was a maxi dress with spaghetti straps and it hugged your hips but was loose around your legs so it was still comfortable.

“It’s perfect,” you smiled softly, looking in the mirror.

Jo hopped off of Emily’s lap and joined you on the little stage, still in her flower girl dress, doing a little twirl. You started to cry from all the happiness and pent-up excitement you were feeling.

-

“Hey, how’d it go?” Spencer asked when you got home.

You rounded the corner to the couch where he was laying.

“That good?” he asked.

“What?” you furrowed your brow, looking at him in confusion because you hadn’t said anything yet.

“You have remnants of mascara on your cheeks indicating that you were crying and that means you must have found the perfect dress because Jo is over there grinning like a fool,” Spencer smiled.

“You know you’re a retired profiler, right?” you teased.

“Mommy looked so pretty, Daddy! You wouldn’t even believe it!” Jo exclaimed.

“Oh, I believe it, Princess,” Spencer lifted Jo up on to his lap, “I know it’s against the rules for me to see Mommy’s dress but can you do a fashion show for me with yours?”

Jo nodded enthusiastically, running up to her room with the bag in her hand.

“Ready!” she called out a few minutes later.

“Now introducing your royal highness, Princess Josephine Y/L/N-Reid,” Spencer announced as Jo walked down the stairs, doing a fancy royal wave.

A/N: i absolutely can not wait to write the wedding chapter

[winterscaptain]

roots.

Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader a joyful future fic

a/n: another one from 2026! aaron retires from federal service this year, at 57. 

words: 2.4k warnings: kids!, missing haley hotchner hours, language

summary: “Every day the increasing weight of years admonishes me more and more, that the shade of retirement is as necessary to me as it will be welcome.” ― George Washington, Farewell Address. au!october 2026

masterlist | a joyful future masterlist | ajf faq | requests closed!

SSA Mallory Kagan asks you to outline your career with the FBI - purposefully using your first name instead of using your title. It keeps the students guessing and paying attention. 

Plus, the payoff when they figure out who you are is the best part of the whole lecture. 

“My career at the FBI is more like a big tree than a path or a journey.” 

You look out over the classroom - blue shirts abound - and take a deep breath to center yourself. 

You’re used to giving this lecture with Aaron, but this is your first fall without him, which also means that this is the first academy class who won’t know him in person. 

They’ll only hear tell of the legend SSA Aaron Hotchner was stabbed nine times, lost his wife to a serial killer, and kept going. You know they’ll hear stories about his severity, his general lack of sunniness, hear rumors about the way he laughs with his children, his wife, and nobody else. 

You know the older agents tell stories about you, too. They say you ‘tamed’ Hotch, made him a little nicer. They might even say they’ve seen him smile at you, or they’ve seen you give him hell in public. 

Aaron Hotchner is practically a myth, now, only supported by your reputation, tall tales from academy classes of yesteryear, and his own legacy.

That retired bastard currently sits in your house with your kids, right on his fine behind, very likely falling into boredom-addled insanity. 

“Everything that I am - a parent, a wife, a friend, and an agent - is because of my work with the Behavioral Analysis Unit over the past nineteen years. My unit is my family, and I can’t get rid of them. Just like our own families, we love to hate each other.” 

The room laughs, and you know you have them hooked. 

“Jokes aside, I would encourage you to get to know your colleagues. Each relationship I built within my unit put a root into the ground, made the proverbial tree stronger - to extend the metaphor. I work with very few of the same people I started with, but I feel as steady and supported as I did back when they called us ‘The Elite Eight.’” 

You chuckle a little, clicking through your introductory slide to showcase a photo of the BAU in 2012. You point to each of them as you speak. 

“SSA Emily Prentiss, current unit chief of the Behavior Analysis unit and former head of the Interpol London office, responsible for taking down one of the most prolific international arms dealers in modern history.” 

The room is quiet, a little awestruck, so you add, “She’s a bit of a big deal.” 

They laugh.

“SSA Derek Morgan - you’ll probably hear stories about how he survived the Boston bombing with SSA Gideon in 2005, but don’t worry. He wasn’t there. He was with his momma in Chicago, celebrating her birthday.”

Another laugh. 

You’ve honed this routine over the last five years, knowing what to add, when to pause, what to cut if the students lose interest. 

“That said, SSA Morgan is one of the best profilers I’ve had the pleasure of working with. Today, he’s a consultant for DC Metro SWAT and is otherwise retired.”

Continuing down the line, “SSA Jennifer Jareau - JJ. Former communications liaison for the BAU, State Department, and DoD. She currently serves with the BAU as a profiler. If any of you are interested in PR or media relations, find an opportunity to speak with her about her experience. Her husband, Will, is a detective with the DC Metro Police and has plenty of stories of his own.”

A student raises a hand, and you give her the go-ahead. 

“Sorry for interrupting -“

You stop her. “You didn’t interrupt. You raised your hand. Don’t apologize for taking up space.” 

She smiles a little. “Okay. Um, I’m curious. How many people in your unit are married and/or have children? My understanding is that the work-life balance can be difficult in heavy-travel positions like the BAU.”

“It can absolutely be a challenge.” You look back at the photo. “In the course of my career, six of my colleagues have been or were already married and all of them went on to have children.”

“And you?”

You laugh a little, forgetting you’re alone up here. “Right.” 

The class laughs, and you point yourself out on the slide. 

“I still had my maiden name when this photo was taken, but now I share five children and a last name with SSA Aaron Hotchner.” You throw your thumb at Aaron’s likeness on the screen again for good measure. 

You check in with SSA Kagan to make sure you can share everything you usually do with Aaron present - your marriage was often the punchline of your lectures, letting you toe the line of humor a little farther than you normally would. 

She nods, a little smile on her face. 

“While I wouldn’t necessarily recommend dating your unit chief or marrying your section chief -“ you pause, holding your hands up in surrender to the echo of laughter “- even if they are the same person - you can certainly find the best people without looking too hard.” 

Hands shoot up into the air, but that always happens. It’s around this time people start asking the good questions. The people from their course materials and the people in front of them start to link together. 

They also figure out that you’re Agent Hotchner. That Agent Hotchner - the one married to the Agent Hotchner. 

You look out over the crowd again. “I know you have lots of questions, and I’m happy to confirm or deny any rumors about myself or my family, but,” you pause for dramatic effect. “Hold them for now - you’ll want to know the players before you ask the questions.” 

Hands drop, but pens start moving. You continue down the line, skipping over Aaron. 

“SSA David Rossi, a founding member of the BAU in the late 1980’s. He worked closely with SSA Jason Gideon, developing a database that we use to this day - one that outlines signatures, modus operandi, and victimology of modern serial killers. SSA Rossi is also well-known for his books - ten of them, in fact, that cover what we do in a kind of…” 

You search for a word. 

“Conversational format. He retired a couple of years ago, and is a full-time grandpa to all 16 of the BAU offspring.”

A few scattered chuckles pass through the room. 

“And then we have Dr. Spencer Reid - I could enumerate his degrees, but we don’t have that kind of time. He’s the smartest person I’ve ever met, and remains an asset to the BAU in the field today.” 

You click to another slide - a photo of all of you taken a few weeks ago. 

“SSA Matthew Simmons - retired from the United States Army and former member of the FBI International Response Team, or IRT. He’s been with the BAU for ten years now. Like Dr. Reid and SSA Prentiss, he knows multiple languages - which comes in handy.” You look out and raise your eyebrows. “I hope all of you did well in your Spanish classes in high school - you might need it.” 

Another laugh. 

“SSA Luke Alvez and Technical Analyst Penelope Garcia are another pair that come from, shall we say, nontraditional backgrounds. While Garcia is no longer with the BAU, SSA Alvez is also celebrating his tenth year with us this fall.” 

A student raises his hand, and you call on him. 

“Isn’t Penelope Garcia the hacker known as The Black Queen? I learned about her work when I was at MIT.” 

You snort. “Nice way to slip in you went to MIT, there, bud.” You pause, waiting for the ruckus to die down as the student in question turns bright red. “But yes. Her experience was invaluable to our team. Just to keep up, we stole an analyst from the NSA to replace her - nobody else could cut the mustard.” 

You look back, stepping forward and pacing as you speak.”And finally, Dr. Tara Lewis. Formerly working in the FBI Counsel’s office as a forensic psychologist, she joined our team on cases where specific pathologies were in play before becoming a full-fledged member of our team.

“So, as you can see, there are so many varied qualities we look for in profilers, and your own path will be informed by the skills you develop, your temperament, and your dedication to the work itself. There’s no right way to be an agent, and when you leave the academy in five weeks, the whole world of the bureau will be open to you.” 

Clicking back to your introductory slide, you turn to the front of the classroom. “I know all my colleagues well enough to take any questions you may have about their careers and paths through the bureau. For any questions I can’t answer, I am happy to direct you to them with the understanding they may not get back to you due to our caseload. I’ll take your questions now.” 

Hands shoot up into the air, and you specifically call on the student in the back - the one you know has a question about Aaron. 

“So, when you say SSA Aaron Hotchner, you mean the same one that worked the Boston Reaper case for ten years?”

SSA Kagan checks in with you, ready to shut him down, but you call her off. 

“That’s right. SSAs Jareau, Morgan, Prentiss, Rossi, Dr. Reid, Miss Garcia, and I worked that case in its final year as well.” 

“I have a follow-up if that’s okay.” 

You tacitly give him leave to continue. 

“How do you handle cases that get that… close? I know there were considerable...” He searches for the right word. “...challenges. How did you guys deal with that?”  

Good question. 

Returning to the podium, you lean heavily against it, lacing your fingers in front of you. “You’ve all read the Reaper case file, yes? It’s still included in the MCRT training courses?”

There are nods around the room, but you check in with Kagan anyway. 

“The declassified version is covered,” She says. “They’re familiar with the full scope of the case.” 

“Okay. So, as you all know…”

You remind them what happened, from 1998 to 2009, finally landing where the students want you. “And on November 23rd, 2009, Haley Reneé Hotchner was George Foyet’s 40th and final victim. She was thirty-nine years old. And she was my friend.” 

The room is dead silent, all eyes on you, somber and attentive. 

“The case was personal. It became personal because Foyet forced our hands. He attacked Agent Hotchner in his home and then targeted his family. So, the question is, how do we deal with that? Right?” 

Even Kagan’s watching you closely. It’s the first time you’ve covered this case without the rest of your team. In your joint lectures with Aaron, the case is off-limits for questions. She’s never heard you tell the story in your own words. 

You take a breath. “And the answer is… you don’t.” 

There are some confused faces, so you elaborate. “There isn’t anything you can do to push the case away from you - that’s how people get hurt. In the meantime, you make adjustments. Agent Hotchner placed Agent Morgan in an interim unit chief position until the case was over, for the sake of his health and sanity. We chased down every lead, understanding that the faster we caught Foyet, the faster Haley and Jack, Agent Hotchner’s son, could come home.” 

A young woman in front tentatively raises a hand, and you open a hand to her. “Yes?” 

“What happened, you know, after?” 

“We moved on as best we could. Going back to my original point -” 

You leave the podium and take your place in the center of the floor again. 

“- the trust you have in the people you work with can carry you through a great many things. And not all of you will see horror every day - but some of you will.” 

You pause for a moment, hoping this is the part that really sinks in for them. 

“Always have something to come home to. Always have something or someone that brings you peace, that can take you away from the work.” 

+++

You set your things down and walk through the door, immediately accosted by two almost-eight-year-olds and their over-eager little brother. 

“Momma!” 

You haul Elliot onto your hip and kiss Sophia’s head as Caroline burrows into your side. “Hi, darlings! Did you already have dinner?”

Sophia moves to answer, but Aaron’s voice shoots around the corner. “Yes!” 

With a smile, you seek him out, dragging the girls along with you. Lo and behold, Aaron’s at the sink, washing dishes. Isaac’s supervising - sitting on the counter, swinging his feet. 

Aaron gets a kiss on the cheek from you as you pass and he turns over his shoulder, chasing you until you peck him on the lips, Elliot squished between you. Your son squirms, and you set him on the ground to chase after his sisters. Isaac hops off the counter likely off to investigate the happenings before retreating to his room for the rest of the evening.

For once, you’re left alone. 

“How was your lecture?” 

Your arms free, you wrap around him and rest your full weight against his chest as he backs himself into the counter. “Went well. Missed you, though.” 

The corner of his mouth tips up. “Did they ask about Foyet?” 

“Mhmm. It was a good segue into trusting your team and building each other up, knowing when to step back, etcetera.” 

He nods. “Good way to bring it back around. How’s Kagan?” 

“She’s good, loving it, as always.” 

“Think she’s ever gonna retire?” He asks, tucking into your neck. 

You laugh as he presses kisses to the underside of your jaw. “Probably not.” 

Aaron leans back to look at you, bringing his hand to your face to brush over your cheekbone. “Are you ever gonna retire?” 

“Probably not.” 

“What if,” he says, his hands slipping into your back pockets, “you retired in…” He does the math in his head. “Thirteen-ish years and I make it worth your while.” 

“Oh yeah? Worth my while? And you’ll be, what, a hundred years old?” 

His eyes roll so hard you’re sure he could see his own brain. You pull him down for a kiss, but it doesn’t stop him from mumbling, “Give me a fuckin’ break,” against your mouth. 

“Never.” 

+++

tagging: @writefasttalkevenfaster @quillvine @stxrrywildflower @hurricanejjareau @ughitsbaby @rousethemouse @criminalsmarts @genevievedarcygranger @ssaic-jareau @hotchsflower @hotchslatte @risenfox @mrs-dr-reid @mrs-marcus-moreno @pan-pride-12 @sunshine-em @jdougl-love @dreila03 @forgottenword @aaronhotchnerr @ssa-morgan @tegggeeee @abschaffer2 @ssacandice-ray @ellyhotchner @lotties-journey-abroad @mrs-joel-pimentel-23-25 @mooneylupinblack @ssareidbby @qvid-pro-qvo @mandylove1000 @jeor @wakatoshislover @word-scribbless @bwbatta @capricorngf @missdowntonabbey @averyhotchner @joanofarkansass @popped-weasels @evee87 @nuvoleincielo @ssahotchnerr @this-broken-band-girl @winqhster @reidtomestyles @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @the-falling-in-the-danger @softbibxtch @iconicc @mangoberry43 @andreasworlsboring101 @kerrswriting @mac99martin @itsalwaysb33nyou @baumarvel @messyhairday-me @ssworldofsw @deagibs @crazyshannonigans @moonshinerbynight @jhiddles03 @teamhappyme @mendesmelodies @starsandasteroids @unicorn-bitch @ambicaos​ @itsmytimetoodream @pinkdiamond1016 

[duuhrayliegh]

social media

warnings: none? maybe a smidgen of language? fluffy bucky, bad description of dancing? idk, there really isn’t anything in this one to be warned about it just super wholesome

word count: 2437 

a/n: okay so this came out longer than i meant it to, but i’m not mad at it. there’s mention of he/they pronouns and gender identity, if i didn’t do the subject justice please let me know. also tiktok mentions and all creators are tagged accordingly so please go appreciate their wonderfulness :) 

p.s.: my requests and tag lists are open!! 

if you want to know where these characters are coming from, check out the other parts! you don’t have to read them in any particular order!

ray’s m.list

******************************

Being from the 1940’s, Bucky didn’t have much education in the world of smartphones and social media. When he came out of cryo in Wakanda, Shuri wasted no time showing him the ways of the iPhone. Honestly, he was stunned because there were so many things you could do with it. So much information was available at the touch of his fingers.

Shuri taught him the ins and outs of the phone. He had gotten pretty good at it, if he did say so himself. She had just begun to teach Bucky about social media when Steve pulled him back to the Big Apple. When he returned to New York, he was able to easily contact Steve, who was not as proficient as Bucky was. So when he met the fantastical group of four friends, they began to teach him. This was one of those things that they were incredibly excited to teach Bucky about.

“So you don’t have an account on anything?” Freddie held his hand out for Bucky’s phone.

“No, I have one on something. I think Instant Graham? My friend set it up for me, but she never taught me how to use it.” Freddie smiled and shook his head, dark curls bouncing back and forth.

“It’s Instagram, bubs and that’s a good jumping off point.” He opened the black iPhone and swiped through the pages on the homescreen. Coming across the sunset colored icon, he hovered his finger over it. The screen changed, opening to a white screen with the words, WELCOME to INSTAGRAM, whitewolf. Bucky smiled at the name displayed and Freddie scrunched his brows.

“What is a White Wolf?”

“I’m the White Wolf. It’s Wakandan. We can change it if we need to.” Freddie looked over at Bucky and saw the happiness on his face at the name.

“No, it’s good we can leave it.” He clicked on the profile button in the bottom right corner of the screen. “Okay, so this is your personal profile.” In the top left corner whitewolf was written with a little arrow next to it facing downward. Freddie opened the edit profile section.

“Do you have a favorite picture of yourself? You have to set a profile picture so people know that it’s you.” Bucky nodded in understanding, and then took his phone back to scroll through his pictures. He didn’t have many, just the ones that he took recently. There was hardly any of just him, but he eventually found one he deemed good enough.

“Alright, now what do you want to put in your bio?” Shrugging his shoulders, Bucky leaned back into Cassie’s plush couch.

“What does yours say?” Freddie pulled his own phone out of his pocket. The pale lilac color seemed to shine through the clear case that it wore. Opening his own Instagram, Freddie leaned the phone towards Bucky.

|| he/they || activist || va te faire voir ||

“What does ‘he slash they’ mean?”

“Oh, those are my pronouns.” Freddie received a head tilt from Bucky, so he decided to elaborate. “So, I identify as a non-binary who is comfortable with you using he/him pronouns or they/them pronouns. If you’re talking about me to someone else, you can say ‘he is at the store,’ or ‘they are at the store.’” Bucky nodded, still a bit confused on the subject.

“When do you use each one? Like is there a certain time that you say he and him and another time for they and them?” Bucky was trying to get some clarification on the topic.

“Not necessarily. Usually, when you’re first talking to someone, it’s common practice nowadays to use they/them pronouns so as to not misgender anyone. I know it probably sounds a bit excessive and a small bit over sensitive to you, but to a queer or non-binary person it makes a whole hell of a lot of difference when someone tries to be inclusive.”

“Okay, so like if I just meet someone on the street, I should use the they/them pronouns until told otherwise?”

“Yeah, absolutely. Do you want to include your pronouns in your bio?” Bucky smiled and nodded, happy with himself that he was able to understand that so well.

“So, what does it mean to be non-binary and still use the he/him pronouns? Don’t those two contradict each other?”

“Not really. Gender is a spectrum, as is sexuality, but for someone to identify as non-binary and use he/they pronouns, means that I feel that not everything about manhood accurately describes my truth. On that same hand, I still do identify as a male.”

“Right, right.” Throughout Freddie’s lesson about gender identity, he was able to finish Bucky’s profile and begin to follow the three girls. After clicking the blue follow button on all three of the girls profiles, the group chat between them started blowing up, that was a new phrase Bucky learned last week.

Evie: um, i just got the weirdest insta notif

Penny: me too???

Cassie: I did too.

Cassie: Wait, who is Bucky with right now?

Evie: DANG IT FREDERICK I WANTED TO HELP HIM SET IT UP

Bucky: My name isn’t Frederick, Evie

Incoming Call from Evie

“What do you want, spaz?” Freddie answered on speakerphone. An indignant scoff  came from the other end.

“I thought we were all going to help him with that, Frederick.”

“Um, I don’t remember us talking about that.” He laughed as the door to Cassie’s apartment opened, allowing Penny to walk in and smile at the two men on the couch. “Also, when were we going to have time to do that with you being at school and all?”

“We were going to wait until the weekend!”

“Eves, you’ve been saying that for the past like three weeks.”

“Oh my gosh, fine.” Her end of the phone got real quiet, “I’ll be home in like ten minutes. I call dibs on helping him set up a TikTok.” Three beeps signalled to the room that Evie had hung up the phone. Bucky turned to Penny and began to ask about her day.

“Ya know, the usual. Rude customers, bratty co-workers, life’s a dream at the bank.” She slipped out of her nude heels and made her way to the sofa. “What have you boys been up to?”

“We have been setting Buck up with some social media and learning about gender identity and respecting pronouns.” Freddie said proudly as he handed Bucky his phone back.

“Sick! Which ones did you do?”

“All the classics, Instagram, Twitter and Facebook just for PR though because hardly anyone uses it anymore.”

“Right, and can’t do TikTok until Evie gets here. Um, did you set up a Spotify for him?” Bucky recognized the name and the memories of Shuri helping him floated in his head.

“Oh, I have one of those. That was actually the first thing that Shuri helped me set up whenever I got this thing.” He opened the app quickly to prove what he was saying. Penny smiled and gave a small thumbs up. “I do have one question.” The two of them gave Bucky their undivided attention. “What is a TikTok?”

“Right, so it’s just short videos. It’s really pretty cool and a really good way to waste time.” Freddie answered while pulling up his own page on the app.

“Yeah, and the thing that shows you videos is curated to your tastes because it’s based on your likes and people you follow.”

“I’m almost positive that Evie is going to teach you a dance and do a TikTok with you, if you agree to it.” Penny laughed at the thought of Bucky doing one of the dances that she saw on her For You page. The door to the apartment swung open a second time, revealing a winded Evie.

She dropped her school bag on the floor, hunching over while gripping the side of the granite countertop. Evie held a finger up and the group on the couch waited for her to speak.

“I ran--” deep inhale, “I ran from the subway.” Another deep breath as she lifted her upper half, stretching out her back with her hands on the back of her hips. “You haven’t done TikTok yet right?”

“No, your Highness, we haven’t done TikTok.” She smiled big and then plopped herself on Bucky’s left side. She thrust her hand toward him, wiggling her fingers. Bucky cautiously placed his phone in the center of her palm.

“This is going to be good. Okay so since your name on Instagram is whitewolf, we can’t use that for TikTok. It’s gotta be something snappy.”

“I don’t know, I think you can use the same one for both, Eve.” Penny remarked as Evie downloaded TikTok onto Bucky’s phone.

“Well, of course you can, but we’re not going to.” She giggled as the app opened. She looked over at Bucky with wrinkled brows. “Do you have any nicknames?”

“Um, Bucky is my nickname.” He said in a duh tone.

“Well, obviously, but do you have any other ones? Like, what do your friends call you?”

“Bucky or Buck, I don’t really have nicknames.” Evie groaned and threw her head back.

“Okay, well let’s think. You’re a Sergeant. Your real name is James Buchanan Barnes. Superhero name is Winter Soldier or White Wolf. You have a metal arm.”

“You’re literally just stating facts, Evie.” Freddie said from the other side of Bucky, who was nodding along in confirmation to Evie’s statements.

“I know! I’m processing. What about vibraniumjames?”

“That’s disgusting.” “Mm, yeah that’s a no from me.” Penny and Freddie talked at the same time.

“metallicsergeant? jamesbby? Any of those tickle our fancy?”

“The first one isn’t terrible, but it’s not great. Why don’t you just use whitewolf like his Instagram? Or you could do iambuckybarnes.”

“Yeah, I’m with Freddie. I like whitewolf or iambuckybarnes, it’s simple. And I am the White Wolf, so yeah.” Bucky said to a disgruntled Evie.

“Oh my gosh, fine. We can always change it later, but this is fine for now.” She set up his profile, making it match the other ones that Freddie had made. Once she was finished with her work, she turned to Bucky and smiled big again. “Now, I can teach you a dance and if you’re cool with it we can post it on your profile.” Bucky shook his head and pulled himself off of the comfy couch beneath him.

“If we’re going to do this, we need to do it right, so don’t hold back on me.” He smiled as Evie squealed in excitement.

“You know, my school friends were just dying to see the day that you got social media.” This statement confused Bucky.

“And why would that be?” Evie laughed as she scrolled through her TikTok feed, searching for the right dance to do with Bucky.

“Well, for one, they think you’re hot and they’re thirsty hoes.” She clicked on the original dance video, showing the screen to Bucky. “And, for two, they love you. Everyone does.” Bucky shook his head at that. He did too many bad things for everyone to love him.

“Hey, remember what we talked about?” Penny said from across the room. “We don’t downgrade our progress. Most of the general public is more forgiving than we give them credit for.” Bucky nodded then focused his attention on the video.

“This is Cardi B’s song Up. People on TikTok have made a challenge of doing this dance to the song. I think it originated with a girl named Mya Nicole. Anyway! We’re going to do this one, if you’re up for it.” Bucky looked at Evie with one brow quirked. There was so much shaking in this. Nonetheless, he shrugged his shoulders., it clearly was making Evie happy so he wasn’t going to take that away.

“Sickening! Okay, let’s start learning it.” It took a good hour and a half to help Bucky move his body in the way that the dance required. By the time they were ready to start filming the actual video, Cassie had walked in.

“What is happening here?” A large smile spread across her face as she watched Bucky and Evie practice one last time. A breathless Evie turned to Cassie.

“Bucky agreed to do the Cardi B Up dance with me.” She then turned to Bucky, “You ready to do this for real?” The tall man beside her shook his head while laughing.

“Yeah, let’s do it.” From the safety of the couch, Freddie, Penny and Cassie were watching the scene before them unfold. Both Bucky and Evie jumped into frame, with their legs spread wide. Throwing their fists in front of them and then behind their legs in time with the music. Bringing their hands above their head to clap and then jumping again, throwing just one hand up at a time.

Shifting to the side, the pair brought the leg closest to the camera up to their waist while hitting it back down with their fist. They both remained facing sideways as they shook the leg they just hit and ran their hands down their torso. The pair did another vertical jump, bringing their knees up to their fists. Once their feet hit the floor, they folded at the waist, slamming their palms flat on the ground.

Smiles were plastered on both their faces as they finished out the dance, knees bent, bouncing their legs back and forth while tossing their hands above their heads. Loud laughter rang out from the three friends in the living room as Bucky and Evie dropped to their butts. The video ended with Bucky and Evie yelling at the other three in the room.

“You’re definitely going to go viral with that one, Buck!”

“Like an infection?” He asked with wide eyes of concern, more peels of laughter rang out.

“No, like famous, lots of people are going to see it.” That relieved and scared Bucky at the same time. He wasn’t quite sure how he felt about it, but he knows that his friends wouldn’t steer him wrong.

“Now we can caption it something cute!” Evie breathed out as she leaned over the couch next to Cassie, who was now curled up beneath a fluffy white blanket.

“Don’t forget to tag the original creator, I hate it when people don’t do that.”

The video was posted with the caption,

iambuckybarnes: am i doing the tiktok right realpokemonevie? dance cr: theemyanicole

And it wasn’t long after posting that Bucky got a call from Steve that he needed to come into the tower.

***************************

@mishaandthebrits

[empire-of-wildfire]

HOLIDAY SURPRISE

A @starseternalnighttriumphant X @empire-of-wildfire CHRISTMAS MINI-FIC COLLABORATION

a/n: here’s the first part guys!! We hope you guys enjoy it! Sorry for those of you that saw this yesterday, I’m not sure why tumblr decided to post it almost 24 hours early. Send me or Hannah @starseternalnighttriumphant an ask if you’d like to be added to the tag list!

Cassian Laskaris’s personal phone buzzed in his jacket pocket, causing him to frown. Almost no one bothered him on his phone while he was at work, so he fished it out of the deep pocket and looked at the name that flashed on the screen. A sigh followed by a small smirk, he answered the call and put the phone up to his ear.

“Yes, Your Highness?”

“Funny,” Rhys answered, voice full of amusement. “I was just checking for cold feet.”

“Are you sure you meant to call me and not Feyre?” Cassian drawled.

“Hers are warm and currently playing footsie with mine.” There was a shuffle and Feyre’s tinkling laugh in the background. “I just want to make sure you’re actually coming.”

Rhys’s worry was genuine, but it still grated Cassian’s nerves. He had promised his found brother he would be there for his wedding, and Cassian was many things, but he never broke his promises to the people he loved.

“Yes, bastard brother of mine,” Cassian sighed, spinning in his office chair. “I leave in the morning. I’ll see your ugly face tomorrow.”

His door opened, a beautiful dark haired, deeply tanned skin woman walking in, her hips swinging. Emerie smirked at him, holding a folder, and he took his time dragging his eyes over her. She looked extremely good in that tight black dress and he wanted to—

“Are you still there?”

“Sorry,” Cassian muttered, leashing his dirty thoughts. Now wasn’t the time. “Yes, Rhys, I’ll be there. I have everything set up, I’ll see you around one or two p.m.”

He hung up before Rhys could say anything else, turning his womanizing smile towards Emerie. She had started at the firm less than a year ago, and Cassian knew he shouldn’t have spent most of the time fooling around with her. But she was a good distraction, and she didn’t want anything from him besides friendship with benefits. She was also the only woman that had lasted this long in the past four years since he’d left Velaris. Most women only made it a few weeks, maybe a month or two.

“Dinner tonight before I leave?” he asked as she handed him the folder containing his next high profile law case.

“My pleasure,” she purred, winking as she left.

-

Despite Rhys’s protests, Cassian had decided to rent a car and stay at one of the two hotels in Velaris. He hadn’t been home once in four years; he felt awkward even being back in his old stomping grounds without the subtle tension his presence in Rhys and Feyre’s home would bring. He didn’t fit in anymore, and though his brother would never admit it, Cassian knew it was better to keep a distance. And he knew Rhys and Feyre would be busy with wedding planning, and his intrusion in their house would probably create more stress since he was staying through Christmas until the day after New Years, their wedding on the very first day of the year. Rhys and Feyre were disgustingly romantic like that.

After checking into the hotel and letting Rhys know he was on his way, Cassian decided last minute to take the scenic route to his brother’s home. He wasn’t sure what had pushed him to do it; curiosity, maybe. He hadn’t been home in four years.

Velaris hadn’t changed much in the years since he’d been gone. Honestly it was like looking into a time capsule— everything was almost identical to how it had been when he’d blown out of town to chase his dreams. Driving through the small town, he was immediately transported back in time to his high school and college days.

Ahead on his right was the park where he’d met Feyre, Nesta, and Elain not long after the Archeron family had moved to Velaris. He still remembered that night perfectly: he’d been having a normal conversation with Azriel when Feyre walked over, her sisters in tow, and his entire world had stopped the moment his eyes fell on Nesta. She was without a doubt the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen. Dressed simply in a gray t-shirt dress and sandals, her long golden brown hair was braided around her head. Cassian remembered marveling, knowing that something so intricate had to have taken quite a bit of time. Nesta hadn’t appreciated the staring, and made sure to tell him as much as soon as she walked up to him.

He abruptly shook himself out of the memory, trying to focus on driving so he didn’t get lost in his past and the girl who still haunted his dreams even four years later. But then just a bit further down the road, there was the restaurant where he’d taken her on their first date, almost a year after he’d met her. It had taken him so long to get her to go out with him, he honestly thought she’d just agreed to get him to leave her alone. But that night he’d walked her to the door and he’d said goodnight, not wanting to push her too far. He had moved to leave when she’d grabbed him by the shirt and kissed him. Nesta was the kind of girl who knew what she wanted, even back then, and that first kiss broke and remade him all at once.

The entire drive to Rhys’s house was a lot of the same. He passed their spot, a hidden trail leading back to a small lake that he’d taken Nesta to after six months of dating, which was where they had their first time. He still sometimes got embarrassed at how awkward he’d been then. He passed the Archeron’s old house, now occupied by a different family, which was where he told her he loved her for the first time. Everywhere he turned, memories of him and Nesta haunted him like a ghost. It left him unsettled, that despite years of silence and trying to forget and move on, Nesta was still so much a part of who he was.

He was glad when he finally pulled Rhys’s driveway, able to put the memories of the past to bed and focus on the present. His excitement at being home increased exponentially as he got out of the car; he’d missed his brothers, and despite how infrequently they communicated he still loved his family fiercely.

He knocked on the door twice and within seconds it was opening. He hadn’t expected it to be the tall and lithe woman his brother had been in love with nearly a decade, but his grin was genuine as Feyre laughed in delight and all but jumped into his arms, hugging him tight. He wrapped a strong arm around her, hefting her up as he pushed further into their house. He set her down and he ruffled her hair when she looked back at him.

She batted his hand away. “I was worried I wouldn’t recognize you.”

He raised a brow. “I’m hurt. It’s only been a few years.”

Feyre rolled her eyes and turned towards the staircase. “Rhys, my favorite brother is here!”

Cassian laughed as Rhys came down the stairs, shaking his head. “Gone four years and you’re already trying to steal my fiancée, brother.”

The two hugged firmly, and Cassian tried to ignore the tightness in his throat. He remembered the last time he’d seen Rhys in person. It had been a year after he left, and his brother had all but begged him to come home. But Cassian had been so entrenched in his work, climbing up the ladder at the law office he’d joined, and he’d refused. It had led to a huge argument, and though it had long since been resolved, Cassian still thought about it almost everyday.

“It’s good to see you,” Rhys told him, clapping him on the shoulder. “I hope you’re ready for some wedding planning because we have about five more seconds before Feyre darling sends you out on a task.”

Feyre’s slim hand smacked Rhys’s arm. “I was going to ease him into it.”

Cassian huffed a laugh, meeting his future sister-in-law’s eyes. “Tell me what you need.”

Feyre rattled off that she needed him to pick up all the stationary waiting at the printing shop, place cards and thank you notes and custom signs to scatter around the wedding venue. She gave him the receipt and told him where it was, even though it was unnecessary. It seemed that nothing had changed in this small town, and that included the local printing shop. He was willing to bet it was still owned by the same old woman that had printed their graduation announcements so many years ago.

The shop was near the town center, and he parked on the side of the road next to the library. He got out and looked at the towering structure, knowing that it used to be the town hall hundreds of years ago when Velaris used to only have a few hundred people. Now it was the library, and his mind drifted back to spending summers there, doing book reports on books he never actually read. He remembered finding Nesta there the next week after he’d met her and her sisters, nestled in a quiet corner with a book in her hands.

He’d been surprised; he’d only known her for a week but she had struck him as the reading type. He remembered he had come up to her to talk to her and she’d hid the book behind her back, a light blush staining her cheeks, taking his breath away which he had tried to hide with a laugh. He’d managed to grab the book from her hands and saw that it was one of the smutty romances that were in the adult section that he and his brothers had snickered at as young teens.

A slight smile turned his lips up as he remembered how embarrassed and angry she’d been, and how she’d gotten him back by “accidentally” spilling her drink all over his pants during lunch. He’d been mocked for weeks.

He blinked, pulling himself out of the memory, shaking his head slightly. Gods, he was going to go insane if he stayed in this town longer than he had to. It was bad enough he was here for over a week. He’d have to stay holed up in his hotel room as much as possible if he wanted to escape wave after wave of memories and nostalgia that seemed to crash into him without any warning.

Cassian headed down the street and grabbed all the wedding stationary from the printing shop. Sure enough, it was that same old lady. And she’d been delighted that he was back in town, patting his cheeks and telling him to come by before he left. He’d given her his charming grin, but he’d left feeling… off.

The drive back to Rhys and Feyre’s house was a blur, trying not to let his mind wander as he pulled into the driveway. Hefting the large paper bags that held everything Feyre had ordered, he walked up the steps and reached for the doorknob with his free hand.

The door opened before his fingers even brushed the cool metal, a figure he’d almost mistaken as Feyre standing in the doorway. She was dressed in dark blue scrubs, her golden brown hair braided in that all too familiar crown around her head. Her smooth, flawless face froze in an expression of pure shock, her full lips falling open as she stared at him.

He knew his own mouth was hanging open, his heart in his throat as he met the steel blue gaze of the woman he had known better than he’d known himself. A woman he’d loved fiercely for almost seven years, a face that haunted his dreams even when he tried so hard to forget her.

He hadn’t seen her, handn’t heard from her, hadn’t even heard her voice in four years but Nesta Archeron’s silky tone still managed to raise goosebumps along his skin as she blurted out, “What the fuck are you doing here?”

-

@werewolffprince

@schmlip-scribble

@justgiu12

@westofmoon

@legallyhermione

@love-is-a-contradiction

@shyvioletcat

@oversizedbats

@superspiritfestival

@ladywitchling

@highqueenofelfhame

@disgreisful

@empress-ofbloodshed

@lovemollywho

@rocky99

[ao3-sucks]

An Archive of Someone’s Own: my experiences being groomed in fandom circles on AO3

TW: Childhood sexual abuse, grooming, mentions of incest and rape.

I used to be a big writer of fanfiction. It was the logical choice for me. I loved to write and create bold and immersive worlds, and I craved an audience who would enjoy my work as much as I did. Since my writing wasn’t actually good, I needed a community of other amateurs who wouldn’t mind that, and by tweaking my characters and settings into ones from canonical media, I got the audience I so craved.

I started writing fanfiction online when I was 14, posting initially on FanFiction.net and then moving to AO3 a few months later. As I got back into writing original fiction towards the end of high school, I lost interest in this community, and it’s been a long time since I posted anything much on AO3.

I’ve always struggled with the fact I display a lot of symptoms of CSA, and for the longest time, I couldn’t figure out why. Throughout my teen years, I refused to get changed or bathe when anyone was even vaguely nearby, constantly paranoid about being spied on; I developed a severe touch phobia, and would have frequent panic attacks from something as small as brushing arms with a passerby; I resolutely identified as asexual and refused to get into anything resembling a relationship with others because the very concept disgusted and repulsed me.

Weird, considering I had grown up pretty normal and all of these symptoms had started around my early teens. It was only when I told my friends about my friendship with a 30 year old I had met online that the pieces started falling into place for me.

Child grooming is usually discussed in the context of one adult going out of their way to befriend a child with the goal of lowering their resistance to sexual abuse, through normalisation and friendliness. I’d like to talk about how that worked on the fanfiction website AO3. Since it’s an open website and most communication takes place between anonymous users or accounts in the comments section of a work, there is very little delineation between spaces for adults to discuss whatever dark topics they like and spaces for kids to do the same.

This frequently leads to pretty inappropriate conversations between people of widely varying ages and life experiences, which is how I ended up talking sex as a fourteen year old with people ranging from a couple of years older than me, who were generally okay, to more than twice my age. The 30 year old in question listed on her profile how many pedophilic ships she loved, and she knew my age but pushed me to keep discussing sexual topics with her. Sounds like a red flag, yeah? Well. I was 14, and very stupid.

This 30 year old woman, who I will call Aku (because it’s similar to her screen name and because it’s funny to name her after the bad guy from Samurai Jack) would start conversations with me whenever I posted anything to AO3 and would refuse to take no for an answer when I tried to back out of conversations with her, and since these conversations were public and occurring within comments, I didn’t want to be rude to her since this was taking place on content I was trying to promote.

I told her my age multiple times and she would either pretend she forgot from last time (saying her memory is super bad) or continue as though it was just trivia about me and not a sign she shouldn’t have been pushing me. My primary objection to what she would say to me (since most of it was just her being annoying) was her insistence on sexualising everything I wrote, and her determination to push me into writing pornographic content, which I eventually gave in to.

Yes, she was a terrible person. She emailed me using her personal email address, so I know her full name and place of residence, because she’s an idiot. These emails also contain sexually explicit materials. Nothing much ever happened between us except for these very creepy interactions and the fact we remained online friends for a few years. But here’s the thing: she wasn’t the only person pushing me into creating sexual content. Lots of people would comment on my writing demanding that I show explicit sexual content when I really didn’t want to.

After a while it felt like I couldn’t write a longer, romantic fanfiction without including explicit sexual content. Like my work wasn’t valid without it. Other, more popular writers were usually sexual in their content, and I wanted to be like them and bring in the views, right? So, when I look at my back catalog of works, I can see how my content moved from completely non-sexual to featuring sexual content over time, and the views usually came with. In this way, I was in an environment that was encouraging me on many levels to sexualise my own work, which impacted the way I thought about my creative process.

Here’s another example I remember. When I was a young sprout, I remember reading down someone’s list of fanfiction recommendations and seeing a work called Hug Therapy, which I promptly read. While the work is marked as explicit and containing the Loki/Thor pairing, the use of relationship and rating tags on AO3 is so poorly regulated that it didn’t really mean anything to me to see either of those. People tag hardcore material as non-explicit and tag friendships as relationships, because there’s no motivation to tag properly. Plus, someone I followed here on Tumblr had recommended it to me.

Now, you wouldn’t know from the listing, but while this piece starts out as comedy, it turns out in the end to include rape, incest, and BDSM in very explicit terms. The fact it was tagged as being explicit didn’t slow me down, because the liberal use of these tags could mean that an explicit tag was just there because sexual content was implied or mentioned, which I thought would be the case based on the rest of the listing. Out of curiosity, I recently tried to report this work to the moderators for containing no warnings about incest or rape, and I got this in response:

“Selecting “Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings” satisfies a creator’s obligation under the warnings policy. Users who wish to avoid specific elements entirely should not access fanworks marked with “Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings”. Our Terms of Service note: “You understand that using the Archive may expose you to material that is offensive, triggering, erroneous, sexually explicit, indecent, blasphemous, objectionable, grammatically incorrect, or badly spelled. ….. This decision is in accordance with our policy of maximum inclusiveness; we have therefore closed this case and will not be investigating further.”

Which, yeah, I guess. The frustration comes from how ‘Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings’ is an extremely commonly used tag, and most things that it’s used on are totally harmless.

This fanfiction, which I was recommended by a friend, is hugely popular, in the top 60 most read fanfictions in the entire fandom. You wanna hear the kicker? The author, Astolat, is one of the founders of AO3. They’re not just some random author who isn’t following the rules. They’re a creator of the whole website, and they made the rules. This is pretty telling about how seriously the website actually takes protecting their users.

My final example I want to give is one of fetish content. People in fetish communities generally (not always) say that fetishes are probably something one should work up to after the onset of sexual activity, especially potentially harmful stuff like BDSM. In the circles I was running in, if you weren’t sporting a fetish or two (no matter your age) you were a boring bitch.

Maybe this isn’t true of everywhere in the fanfiction community, but I used to feel that bizarre pressure until I got out. Bear in mind that my main time in this community was from ages 14 to 17. I never made my age a secret, either. I told people outright I was that age, I was in high school, I was playing hockey and studying The Great Gatsby when I wasn’t online.

Since I was in the Avengers fandom and I liked Loki and the Asgardians, I was frequently exposed to incestuous content between Loki and Thor, and a lot of it came out of nowhere or was poorly tagged. This was considered the norm, and while I at first felt completely horrified and repulsed, within a year or two I no longer gave a shit. It’s only in the last few years as I’ve begun to unpack everything that I’ve started to get that strong revulsion reaction to incestuous content.

In the circles I was in, it was relentlessly normal. Normal to the point that people who disliked it were usually shouted down. Even to this day, debate rages on in fandom spaces about whether or not content like this normalises this kind of abuse. In my own personal experience, which I don’t usually like to talk about, it absolutely does.

In real life, this normalisation started to have serious consequences for my mental health and interpersonal relationships. In fanfiction, any occasion when you are alone with someone could become sexual, any familial relationship is possibly sexual, and it doesn’t matter if you like it or not. I became incredibly anxious around male family members for fear of being sexually assaulted, and my OCD, which I had been developing since I was a child, turned from thoughts of physical violence to thoughts of graphically sexually assaulted by anyone and everyone around me.

My fear of being touched got to the point where I would have panic attacks if anyone came anywhere close to touching me. I quit sports, fucked up my romantic relationships, and didn’t hug anyone, not even members of my family, for years. All the while, I had bought my first laptop and was consuming more fanfiction than ever before. I struggled with my sexuality growing up, as I am bisexual, and while fanfiction provided LGBT content to help me, the content was frequently so disturbing that I viewed any expression of sexuality as something evil and predatory.

The community on AO3, whether you like it or not, is often sexual, and provides no barriers between the casual user looking for content and extremely intense fetish material. It’s sometimes called the Pornhub of fanfiction, but considering the wide range of people who use it, it’s more like if you opened Youtube and saw niche hardcore fetish videos just on the front page, recommended and trending.

Sure, you have to click a little button to confirm you’re 18 before you can actually read a story, but the tags and descriptions of readily available works can be extremely explicit. Fanfiction also brings you into close contact with fellow readers and the author, and encourages you to become a content creator, which in some ways makes it more dangerous.

I was affected much more strongly by what I saw than most people would be, because I was already treading shaky ground. But I’m also not the only person out there who has been hurt in this way. Most of my friends who grew up in fandom can report the impact that fanfiction culture had on them. One of my friends from high school knew a panoply of porn terms at age 14 or so due to reading fanfiction, and another of my other friends at high school almost exclusively read rape porn because it was her favourite. I didn’t have friends who watched porn; I had friends who read fanfiction. These are just as troubling to me as any other accounts of young people consuming visual porn from a very early age.

It’s frequently cited that fanfiction gives minority groups the opportunity for creative outlet. It was a great place for me to cut my teeth as a content creator, and a source of acceptance and kindness when times were tough. Fanfiction communities have historically been the domain of women and minorities, and create a space for these people to tell their own stories.

It’s largely because of this that fanfiction communities fear censorship and strict moderation, as they have been attacked in the past on homophobic or misogynistic grounds, resulting in mass deletions of works or the shutdown of websites. But there must be some middle ground between total censorship and the kind of free rein that puts vulnerable people in danger, and I strongly encourage the board of AO3 to seek this middle ground out.

But it’s the community itself that needs to shape up; AO3 is, after all, a community-led website built by fans for fans, so the fact that this website has such issues is a reflection of the issues that run deeply within the people who created it. Aku didn’t talk to me with the intention of doing me harm, or so I believe at this time, and she didn’t pursue me as a lone wolf or in isolation.

She was simply a particularly brazen member of a community that was used to having inappropriate conversations with young people and sexualising everything they did. Even people my own age were jokingly pushing me into discussing and consuming extremely sexual content. It was just normal. That’s what I want to say here. Inside the world of fandom on AO3, the grooming of children with sexual content is normal. And that’s scary.

- Mod Daft

[shoichee]

KNB OC

Name: Shirobi Arisu

School: Touou Academy

Zodiac: Pisces

Note: I gave it an attempt to draw her portraits in the Production I.G artstyle! Excuse the lazy anatomy and messy sketch lines, er... hope they don’t distract you too bad? Also EXTREMELY long profile, hence the cut! This is a 300-follower special, but perhaps I’ll do something with Shirobi in the future! (Shirobi is her surname, Arisu is her first name)

Appearances

Personality

she is very much described to be “fox-like” in demeanor, slipping in and out of conversations naturally and with ease, being able to show different aspects and sides of her to different types of people

her default persona in encountering new people is a noble, unassuming/demure one in order to gauge how they interact with her before adjusting accordingly // you can see what that looks like here

a very innate actress, but the most cynical description of her would be “two-faced,” though it’s important to note that her personas are not so drastic that they seem like different people (like Akashi’s situation); perhaps if someone was keenly observing her for a while, they would notice

she does subtle shifts in aspects of her personality’s repertoire because of: 1.) becoming more compatible with people, and thus, having the most efficient conversations without having “annoying, unnecessary” conflicts with them, and 2.) studying people in different social settings is interesting to her

as a result of her jumping around and exploring different sides of her to different people daily, she does wind up suffering from mini identity crises and mental exhaustion very frequently

after a whole dismantle of her *mostly harmless* mind schemes (particularly by a close friend or two later on), her “true self” would be a deflective “tsundere-like” character, since her visceral reaction is for her to always slip into a convenient persona for the situation rather than being initially honest with herself and the people around her, and without the security of a “persona,” she gets flustered and embarrassed very *very* easily

hobbies in her free time include either being alone to sleep and not worrying about how to present herself or reading various works of (non)fiction (of many genres)/psychology to study people and how they tick (bonus: became a recent internet junkie after finding greater convenience in just finding articles and blogs instantly with a simple click)

irony: she finds talking to people inconvenient and tiring but she finds it intriguing to study them in all aspects of behavioral, cultural, and social means (so she kind of has to talk with people)

certified ambivert

if she does approach to someone, it’s almost never for the reasons of “making friends;” if there is no intellectual gain nor tangible benefit from talking, then she won’t bother partaking in it

because of her recent upbringing, while she may not show it, she despises arguments and fights, so when situations escalate, she will attempt to either smoothly divert the subject elsewhere and/or trivialize the matter to a degree; if all else fails, she will simply disengage from the conversation (essentially avoiding confrontation) // note: see “background” section for context

Teiko-era Personality

pleasant and friendly, albeit shy

perfect example of a polite goody two-shoes and teachers’ pet but still respected among her classmates for her genuine cordiality

very reserved individual but at this time was slowly breaking out of her shell to try to befriend her classmates to distract her mind from thinking about her home life

post-divorce/3rd year of Teiko: see “background” section for context

               *while still maintaining her amiable grace, she slowly detached herself from her acquaintances and classmates, keeping to herself a lot more while critically studying them increasingly as months went by; she began to talk with others only when it was a necessity

                                   *(occurred during her 1st year of Touou) a few months after she graduated from Teiko, she stopped going to the gym after school to observe the first string’s practices and only went to their games for Kōzō’s sake (especially when he fell ill) // her observant skills quickly picked up, even from their games alone, that the Teiko team’s dynamics have completely changed (which she relates this revelation back to Kōzō in the hospital)

                                   *her current personality will hit full force once she enters high school after graduating from Teiko

“Last Game” Personality

reverted mostly back to her genuine, cordial self, but is still very spontaneous in showing different aspects of her personality in different situations, although most who know her can see right through her now (unless she really wanted to fool them, she probably could)

attempts to be more honest with herself and with others, especially in trying to unpack years of compartmentalization starting from her Teiko years

if she’s caught off guard, she will definitely become a flustered tsundere type of person

a happier person now that she’s made friends to rely on (•̀ᴗ•́)و (e.g. Momoi and Sakurai)

Background/Family

her multifaceted personality stemmed from her home life, where her parents became increasingly volatile and erratic when interacting with each other before they finally divorced her 2nd year of middle school

she constantly observed how her parents would initially act romantic on some days, but on many other days, they’d either tiptoe carefully around each other during conversations or they’d immediately fight

                    *rather than focusing on the discord of her home, she’d observe how they’d interact with each other in every situation and how despite being the two same individuals, they both act differently with each other every time they meet, thus feeding her intrigue on how individuals act in various social settings and cues

her parents would later on (shortly before divorcing) only meet up for motives of financial discussions, decisions on who she would live with for the week, etc. and they would no longer spend time together out of sentiment and love

                    *this imprinted into her belief that conversations that bring mutual benefit/reward are much better than other casual interactions, since she sees that they don’t provoke the unnecessary conflict/fights like other interactions do (e.g. seeing her parents fight when they talk about anything else)

Kōzō Shirogane (her great uncle, Teiko’s ex-coach) and Eiji Shirogane (a distant relative, Rakuzan’s current coach) are both from her father’s side of the family, hence she attended Teiko on behalf of Kōzō’s request in exchange for him paying for all of her school’s expenses (he wanted to spend more time with his great niece before he fell completely ill)

she and Kōzō would often be on the upper floor to observe practices together, and she would be immersed in studying how players would interact with each other on and off of courts; he was the one that got her into watching sports games (basketball in particular)

she graduated from Teiko a year before the GoMs did but would frequently visit their practices after school with Kōzō (until he fell ill)

she took after her mother’s surname after the divorce

Kōzō Shirogane fell ill shortly after her parents’ divorce

after graduating from middle school, she lives alone in an apartment under Shirogane’s name

she is not close with her parents but goes to visit each of them separately once in a while when Kōzō makes her go see them

she sees Kōzō as more of the father figure and cares deeply for him, and as for Eiji, she respects and admires him, but she isn’t close with him

ever since Kōzō fell ill, she would visit him in the hospital biweekly and update him on highlights from critical games from middle school and later on, inter-high and winter cup

Headcanons

she is the opposite of Kuroko in which she has a huge presence; it could be because of her hair color, hair pins, the many ways she carries herself throughout the day, or all of the above

why does she wear tons of hairpins? we don’t know, but she thinks they look nice and keeps the unruly hair out (for convenience)

sports games are fun for her to watch up close IRL because she can detect/study the mental games and simulations sparking across different players without having to talk to other people at all // televised games are useless because they cut a lot footage and cameras jump around too much for her to discern anything cohesive on the players

(if she ever got to speak with them) the most interesting people for her to converse with and study would be Midorima (because of his oha asa’s obsessions), Imayoshi, Hanamiya, Akashi, Teppei, Mitobe (she can actually understand him), and Momoi (when she doesn’t fawn over Kuroko)

no one knows what to genuinely get her for her birthday, let alone knowing her actual birthday; the closest thing they know is her zodiac sign

                     *throughout her deduced “birthday month,” different people will approach her with different gifts with what they thought she was interested in (because of her different personas she exhibited with each person): porn mags, antiques, shopping coupons, snacks, comic gags, etc.

                     *she keeps her birthday on the down low to prevent any chances of people being suspicious of her character when they try to throw a party for her and realizing she has these drastic “hobbies” and “interests” with each person // plus she doesn’t see a point of having a party because she knows how these familiar acquaintances would act in this particular situation

                     *she’s a fan of attending other people’s parties to observe them without being in the spotlight for once

she could be considered as part of the “uncrowned” generation considering her cognitive/mental skills and deduction (and she’s the same year as them)

                     *she and riko could be rivals as 2nd years in that sense, along with Momoi when she becomes a 1st year

Role/Skill

if she ever joined a sports club, her critical role would be monitoring and improving cognitive (mental) acuity especially in the following brain functions of: information processing, memory storage, attention, and situational judgement (and how they all respond and handle high pressure), since she’s so keen on studying people and how they act in different situations

she would also study opponents’ levels of acuity especially during huge pressure and high stakes

she will note environmental factors as well as lifestyles on every player; home players would get the according lists of tasks to work on to improve their acuity (which may include diet changes, mental exercises, adjusted sleep schedules, etc.) on their own and get tested on set dates

                 *will also initially ask home players to do a quick self-survey on possible genetic factors that would affect cognitive performance as well as any prescription/drug history

during club hours, she shows a very professional, polite side that purposefully distances herself from the rest of the team, and she is initially solely there to do her job and get compensations from the coach (until eventually she stays because she actually cares for the team)

Interactions

Kuroko: (Teiko + present)

polite with each other, although both will joke with each other in such a way that others can’t really tell if a joke just passed between them or if they’re being serious

she shifts her personality to be slightly more deadpan and delivers more dry humor when she’s around Kuroko

bonus: she addresses him with the nickname “Kurokuro” with the deadpan delivery, and others don’t know whether to laugh or be concerned

she doesn’t jump from his sudden appearances; while she doesn’t detect where he pops up most of the time, when he does, she just shrugs it off casually or does the dry “ahh i’m scared” or “wahhh you scared me” with surrendering hand motions whenever people around her get a genuine jumpscare from him

Kise: (Teiko + present)

with him she becomes more expressive and mildly snickers at their jokes together

the moment his fans come though, she’ll ditch him no questions asked; their constant interrogations and verbal grillings + fangirling are inconvenient to deal with // she’ll observe their behaviors from afar and take note on fan culture though, so she wouldn’t ditch him per say

she finds the fact that Kise can switch between a serious, determined persona and a flamboyant, energetic one so quickly really intriguing to witness every single time

Kise turns to her for mundane advice because “she’s just smart,” but she finds it really annoying and often gives him vague (but still valid) answers to shoo him away

Midorima: (Teiko + present)

she talks to him the most, mostly because his oha asa obsessions and meticulous rituals and schedules are ridiculously fascinating

she takes on a more serious persona (which is easy since she’s a pretty serious-like person to begin with) and subtly challenges Midorima, poking and prodding with very well-veiled questions to uncover the bottom of his obsessions

she does study up a bit of astrology and arcana books because of Midorima // one day he caught her with an astrology book on hand, and he immediately assumed she was into horoscopes as well, to which she did not deny a thing and let him convinced himself that she was (she’s gotta do what she’s gotta do)

after that ordeal, he gave her lucky items for her sign sometimes back in the Teiko days

just two smart brains having casual conversations about school

in the present day, if Takao was there, her persona switches to the one similar to what she’d use with Kise, and both would make snide remarks about Midorima

Midorima is slightly confused in seeing a subtly different side to her but he figured it was just Takao’s antics

Aomine: (Teiko + present)

when it was the days of “Puremine,” she was a supportive character, being slightly more blunt and more outspoken

she was extremely observant of his talent, and she was one of the first people to notice that he was going to bloom in talent before anyone else while also knowing its consequences // she subtly dropped hints for Aomine to slow down his pace in practicing, playing, etc. and to take a step back from basketball, but the blue-haired boy was an idiot so he didn’t pick them up one bit ((AKASHI DID THOUGH, UH))

with current Aomine, she’s presenting a more indifferent persona while further pushing a blunter side of herself when interacting with Aomine

like Imayoshi, she’s picked up on his dilemma and inner turmoil very quickly, but she wasn’t like Momoi who was actively trying to help him // she wasn’t enthusiastic in exerting effort when she knew that what he really needed to have his conflicts resolved was a definitive showdown on the courts

she doesn’t understand the appeal of porn mags at all, but feigns interest in them especially around Aomine (when they attend Touou Academy) to figure out why are people at her age so enthralled by them; Aomine definitely thinks she’s into them and gets her mags of half naked people for her and he’s extremely smug about it (“because we’re bros together” // “you’re welcome,” as he slaps her back way too hard)

she doesn’t really hang out with Aomine in Touou, maybe sometimes after school when she finds him up in the rooftop skipping practice when she’s in the mood to study how he ticks and annoy him for certain reactions to either prove/debunk her predictions

Momoi (Teiko + present)

she takes on a “girlier” and “cutesy” personality to be more compatible with Momoi to get along with her common interests

doesn’t really hang out with Momoi during the Teiko days unless Momoi approached her first with either data analyses, questions, or pleas to come with her to either: go shopping, drag Aomine, follow around Kuroko, etc.

Momoi addresses to her as “senpai” or “chan”

(during Teiko and present) asks her questions about her “love life” with Kuroko in a way that makes Momoi think she’s someone who believes in romance and lovey dovey things (she’s quite neutral about it IRL)

when Momoi finds out they both ended up at Touou, Momoi pounces on her every chance they get and drags her around because “we’re best friends!” // she goes along with it just to see how things turn out

she ends up being Momoi’s listening ear as she rants about Aomine’s awful habits or her worries about the team

Momoi begs and pleads her to join the team and assist them in some way; she outright refused, but Momoi is also intelligent in which she comes up with new offers everyday to try to convince her

she finally agrees when Momoi asked the coach to pay her a weekly salary (poor guy, but then again he’s rich) for her work and take Momoi’s word that the addition of her would be nothing but beneficial for the team’s success

because they're both on the same team together, they both spend even more time together to do analyses on both their own team members and other schools’ players

attends Touou’s games and only watches from first row seats in the audience in order to conduct naturalistic observations on both teams; she will never be on the benches unless it’s the semi-finals onwards

Murasakibara: (Teiko + present)

there isn’t much to study on this guy; he’s as straightforward as a single-file line

she either acts more of a casual childlike persona (by calling him “Muramura” or “Sakisaki-san”) or exhibits more of a stern, serious side (e.g. the persona used with Midorima) depending on the situation/context

she definitely bribes him with snacks and food to do convenient favors (in addition to using childish nicknames), or she throws the snacks far, gives them to someone else, eats them in front of him, etc. to elicit reactions from the man-child

she knows it’s better for her own good to NOT purposely provoke the scary side of Murasakibara, but when that side does come out for other reasons, it’s showtime for her; she’s going to be observing him with hidden glee

she doesn’t talk with him after graduating from Teiko; the next time she’ll see him is during the winter cup, particularly with yosen vs. seirin // it’s another movie marathon for her just watching every players and how they interact with each other (a LITERAL showdown between Teppei and Murasakibara.... Kagami and Himuro.... Himuro and Murasakibara—yeah it’s a field day)

Akashi: (Teiko + present)

she and ore-Akashi get along swell; she is at her surface self the most when conversing with him, not having a need to adjust herself that much from her initial “polite” persona

lots of theoretical talks and hypotheses in studying people and the world; they both respect each other very much

boku-Akashi is a different story; she starts avoiding him tactfully after his other side awakens

the saying “it takes one to know one” is especially true in this case: Akashi is very much aware of her two-facedness, and she is uncomfortable at the fact of him knowing such an innermost secret about herself

at the same time, she knows about where his “other side” “disappeared” to, whereas no one else hadn’t had a clue

both know about each other’s gimmicks and personalities, and throughout the rest of their years at Teiko, it’s a bunch of mind games and careful maneuverings around each other

Akashi finds it thrilling because it’s reminiscent of shogi

she finds this stressful because what the hell please leave me alone i’m trying to avoid you

after she got over her initial anxiety of this newfound revelation of new Akashi, she carefully treads this game and takes the advantage to study how this new side of Akashi ticks

he DEFINITELY caught what she was trying to do with Aomine in dropping hints; in response, he used his role as captain to push Aomine to try harder in games

she DEFINITELY caught what he was trying to do in pushing Aomine in “motivating” him; problem was, she wasn’t going to sacrifice her effort, wellbeing, and life to go against Akashi

after graduating from Teiko, when she still used to observe their practices and games, she was still very much uneasy and tried to downplay her presence to avoid Akashi’s scrutiny (sadly, her presence is too significant) // she really wished she was a Kuroko

she was able to breathe easier once she finds out later that they’re both going to different high schools; she continues to watch more of Rakuzan’s games after finding out that’s where Akashi ended up attending to figure his dynamics with his team + basketball and then predict his current mannerisms off the courts

when ore-Akashi comes back, she’s suspicious at first, but after confirming his character in person, she’s relieved that the “old him” was back (but slightly disappointed that his other self is gone // she kind of found that side of him more interesting to observe)

he still knows how many personas she has under her disposal, but he isn’t going to snitch any time soon

GoMs together: (Teiko + present)

to not give away the fact that she shows different sides to everyone, when everyone gathers/is nearby, she (at least attempts to) becomes a wallflower to observe everyone and act appropriately in the situation if she’s ever addressed to in the group; her name will always come up in some shape or form so she’s prepared to present a neutral persona without throwing people off

since the GoMs all attend different schools, it’s easier for her to socially maneuver around, however she is still cautious when near crowds (before/after games) and groups of people (such as Touou’s team) because they tend to call her over (but she’ll smoothly pretend she didn’t hear/was preoccupied and she’ll slip away)

Haizaki: (Teiko + present)

dear god, she hoped not to ever directly interact with him

he was a morbidly interesting person to observe, from far away // she’s trying to comprehend how this one middle schooler is already so immoral and violent

he’s definitely tried to hit on her, but she smoothly slipped away before he did anything else

it was a never-ending game of weasel and snake; he fancied her because she was someone who was mysterious and “hard to get,” but she’s always slipping away because he was extremely annoying to converse with and she definitely doesn’t want to end up in a fist fight with this guy

this constant chasing was significantly quashed after Akashi ordered him to quit the team (who’s to say that Akashi hadn’t also noticed that Haizaki was trying to harass her? respect women juice)

Haizaki noticed her outside the stadium before his match with kaijo a year later; she was outside ready to enter in before he blocked her way, but after a lot of sugar coating and sidestepping to try to diffuse the situation (she fooled him by feigning interest in him using a slightly more flirtatious, sly persona), she escaped from his grasp once again // it agitated him and that’s why he continued to prowl around outside before he chanced upon Alex and Himuro

Imayoshi: (present)

this guy is an Akashi; he picked up on her multifaceted personality frighteningly fast

except that instead of being wary and observant of her like Akashi would, this guy openly makes passive-aggressive remarks referring to her personality; no one except her would understand his real intentions behind those comments (they inwardly scare and piss her off)

he also had the upperclassman advantages to openly talk to her very casually and harp on her (on the other hand, Akashi was a year younger than her), so he very much does every thing to get under her skin and rile her up

she employs a more sarcastic persona to match up with Imayoshi, but that just makes him more determine to break her facades; in the end, to keep her cool, she just settled for a default polite persona while still shooting occasional flippant responses at him

TLDR; this guy has the same hobby as she does in getting reactions out of people to study them, except Imayoshi is an actual psychic in deciphering people out; perhaps he’s even better at these things than her

Momoi unintentionally helps her out by always telling Imayoshi to “stop bothering her so much,” and all he does is a mock-surrender, replying cheerfully that it was all in good fun

he definitely makes her job harder by trying to be a smartass when she gives him instructions and lists in how to improve his mental acuity; she quickly shuts his attempts down, and he always calls her an “absolute killjoy”

while she knows it’s beneficial to observe an individual who has a similar hobby like herself to see and compare the similarities/differences, Imayoshi makes it really difficult because his keen senses plus her huge presence makes him able to pick her out most of the time

                     *she’s only able to safely observe him when he’s on the courts

                     *other times, she dutifully avoids him unless when she’s doing her job

are they friends? it’s hard to say; they act like they’re familiar with each other but it’s a love-hate relationship // she respects his intuition but she frowns on his personality (it’s the fact that he acts like he knows everything and she knows he also puts up a few “nice guy” facades of his own)

he’s probably the first guy to actually break through her personas completely and get her to snap and yell at him unabashedly one evening when they were walking to a nearby convenience store because he was tagging along (Momoi was with Aomine at the time)

                     *at that moment, she probably also gave Imayoshi a shock for his life for the first time outside of the games

                     *she coughed and went back to her polite persona like nothing happened and that just made him so much more amused

they’re frenemies and rivals, trying to outdo the other in poking each other mentally and out-acting the other

Sakurai: (present)

first impressions of this kid: she pities him a lot

sometimes, she says various things to see if he‘ll apologize just to see which trigger words get him in a sweat to say “sorry”

she’ll either be a *gentler* polite person or take on a more stern/serious side (used with Midorima and sometimes Murasakibara); the latter would be used to try to toughen the poor guy up mentally

increasing Sakurai’s cognitive acuity would be the most difficult considering the fact that (combined with Momoi’s data) there’s a direct relationship between his physical and mental stamina; if he’s extremely exhausted, his mental sharpness declines dramatically along with it

he’s not considered the sharpest tool in the shed, and his naiveté tends to show when he asks innocent questions about her and her life, and one day, this guy accidentally hit the nail on the head when he asked about her family out of curiosity, which was her touchiest subject

                     *she did have a moment of shock and took some time to recollect herself and deflect the subject elsewhere, but Sakurai picked her hesitance up as a sign of offense and spewed a plethora of apologies (to which she had to calm the boy down)

                     *from that point on, although still curious, he became a lot more observant and cautious of how she acts around other people (at first he was watching so he can learn how to not offend her and overstep his boundaries)

as time progresses (especially after their loss at the winter cup), and the more Sakurai just asks her about many things, she does loosen up around him; he does eventually bring up the topic of family (not necessarily hers, but his own) to try to encourage her to talk about her own

Sakurai would be the type of person to be uncharacteristically determined and blunt in particular situations with people whom he considers his friends: here, he would confront her and asked if she was alright and if things were going okay at home

                     *out of curiosity in where he got that confidence boost and respect for him being mentally stronger, she does open up slowly one topic/talk at a time spread out for the next few weeks

both of their different curiosities for each other would lead to them being close friends ´･ᴗ･` (she makes him a more self-assured person and he gives her time to be her true self [or at least develop one], and other than annoying her with his occasional sorry’s, he doesn’t overwhelm her with his presence)

[heavyarethecrowns]

As Kate re-emerges more tanned and confident, a new Middleton girl takes a bow - May 2007

Amid the clatter of small talk and social niceties, it was a well-meaning attempt to rally a young girl's spirits: "Keep your chin up. Don't let them get you down. You'll be fine."

But when Tara Palmer-Tompkinson delivered these words of wisdom to Kate Middleton at a fashionable book launch, what was striking was not the kindness of the older woman's words but how superfluous they appeared.

For, since splitting from Prince William, Kate Middleton seems to have had very little trouble in keeping either her chin, or her profile, high.

ndeed it has become a much remarked oddity of Kate and Prince William's break-up that, in the weeks since her apparent heartbreak, she has never looked better...or happier.

Far from appearing shattered by the very public end of a romance that many - including Kate herself - predicted would end in marriage, Kate sans William is cutting a frankly far sexier figure.

Her hair is shinier, her skin more tanned and her dress sense more youthful than during her tweedy William days.

Far too dignified to accept the vast sums on offer for a royal 'kiss and tell,' she has, The Mail on Sunday has learned, drawn on the support and advice of a trusted few.

And, in the process, one figure has emerged above all as key among the newly single Kate's loyal coterie: her younger sister Pippa.

At 22, Pippa is three years junior to - and 4in shorter than - her more famous sibling but she has had an enormous impact on the emergence of this increasingly sleek and confident Kate.

She is, according to those who know her best, more sassy than Kate, more direct and, tantalisingly, less discreet.

And though these days she may pass largely unrecognised she is unlikely to do so for long.

After all, it was Pippa who joined Kate at the launch of Simon Sebag Montefiore's book on Stalin at Asprey's, Pippa whose hand Kate held as she left trendy London nightclub Boujis at three in the morning four days later, Pippa who will be at Kate's side when the girls attend the Kuoni World Class Cup Polo at Hurtwood Park, West Sussex - a tournament at which both Prince Harry and Charles have played.

In the weeks since her split from William, Kate has gleaned style advice from an executive at Vogue, discussed strategies for dealing with the media from Tatler editor Geordie Greig and, fascinatingly, turned to Guy Pelly, one of William's best friends, for entrance to some of London's coolest clubs. But it is Pippa who has been her ever present consort.

For where Kate's entree into high society was as the prettier 'add-on' to a powerful partner, her staying power may owe much to establishing herself in another, formidable, double act.

And according to one well placed source: "Kate and Pippa have already been dubbed The Wisteria Sisters - they're highly decorative, terribly fragrant and have a ferocious ability to climb.

"Pippa has just graduated in English from Edinburgh University and while other students are taking advantage of the last weeks of term to lie around in the meadows, have late breakfasts and long lunches and generally do very little, Pippa couldn't wait to get down to Kate and to London.

"She'll go back for the graduation ball at the end of June but it's clear that Kate is the key to unlocking a new social life for Pippa and Pippa is there to support Kate.

"So many doors were opened to Kate when she was with William and she's certainly not going to let them close now."

Certainly Pippa seems more than up to the task of putting a well-shod foot in the way of any door that threatens to shut now that Kate and William are no longer together.

According to one university friend: "As soon as Pippa arrived at Edinburgh, she was assiduous about joining the right social circle.

"At Edinburgh, the aristo crowd are divided into two social sets - one crowd who go to London for the weekend and are really into partying and hard drinking and the other who are more staid and go off to each others' country houses for weekends.

"Pippa joined the country set. She was very charming about it but quite ruthless in cultivating the "right" friends.

"If she found out that someone had impressive social credentials - the right title, standing, connections - she would immediately pay them a lot of attention where before she wouldn't have shown the least interest.

"She would leave notes in the pigeonholes of people she coveted as friends, desperate to arrange a time or date to meet.

"She was always well turned out to the point of being prim, always conscious of projecting the "right" image and, if she heard of other girls' "naughty" behaviour - too much drinking or partying or risque behaviour - she'd pull a face like there was a bad taste in her mouth."

Like Kate, Pippa attended Marlborough and, like Kate, her university ascent into the social elite was rapid. By the end of her university days, she could count Ted Innes-Ker and George Percy as flatmates - the sons of the Dukes of Roxburghe and Northumberland respectively.

And her boyfriend, who graduated two years before her, is JJ Jardine Patterson, an Eton friend of Edward and George and scion of a highly successful Hong Kong banking family.

"She met JJ through the boys," a friend said. "It really wasn't the family millions that attracted her to him but the social cachet."

Someone else who has met Pippa on many occasions recalled her as: "A charming girl who hung out with absolute toffs, most of whom are named after counties.

"She is incredibly well mannered and well-brought up. At dinner she always makes sure to speak to the person seated to her left and right.

"She has a lovely figure, much better than Kate's really. She's a very keen and aggressive tennis player. A mother's dream, in many respects.

"But she makes no secret at all of being very socially ambitious - almost aggressively so. She wants power and money."

Which explains perhaps, in part, the mixed feelings that Pippa has expressed to friends since her big sister split from her famous boyfriend.

According to one: "Pippa absolutely loved the fact that Kate dated William because of the cachet it brought but she's also quite pleased Kate's single again.

"She sometimes felt that her mum and dad tended to put Kate first, above her and her brother James, when she was dating William simply because of the extra responsibilities and practical considerations that went with that.

"And she was a little bit jealous that her sister was dating the future King of England.

"It didn't help that James, who's also at Edinburgh, would go around saying, "My sister's going to be the Queen of England." He can be very indiscreet.

"Also, Pippa's glad to "get her sister back". The two are very close and she never got to spend much time with Kate when she dated William. Kate would always put William first."

Indeed, Kate put William before all other considerations - personal and professional.

It is worth noting that, since their split, she has been promoted from assistant accessories buyer to accessories buyer for High Street store Jigsaw.

Pippa is similarly bright, but she is yet to fall upon a career path of her own. She enjoys travel and writing and has expressed an interest in journalism.

However, such thoughts are not foremost in the girls' minds this summer.

Instead, Pippa has moved into the Chelsea home that the girls' parents Carole and Michael bought for Kate and, according to a friend: "The two of them are enjoying being quite girlie together.

They have a mobile tanner who comes round and does their spray-on tan. They love shopping on the Kings Road.

They get ballet pumps at French Sole and Pippa loves Chloe clothes and has her hair done in Richard Ward's VIP section just like Kate.

"Kate gets sent a lot of free clothes and gifts and Pippa is very keen to get in on the action as far as that's concerned. She's happy to go along to parties and events on Kate's coat-tails."

Certainly there has been no shortage of invitations. On Wednesday, the girls will be at Mahiki - a favourite haunt of Prince William and the site of his infamous I'm Free! 'celebration' following his split from Kate.

The marketing for the club is looked after by Guy Pelly and it is Guy who is believed to have invited Kate and Pippa to Wednesday's Johnny Cash-themed party.

Kate and Pippa have also been invited to Richard Branson's pre-Wimbledon party - and have received invitations to the members' enclosure for the tournament.

They are on the guest list for Royal Ascot - though whether or not they will venture towards the Royal Enclosure remains to be seen - and have been invited to the Cartier Polo at Windsor Great Park on the last Sunday of July.

Ahead of them both lies the tantalising prospect of a summer of sisterly fun - with a social agenda writ large.

One close friend says: "Obviously, Kate and William aren't together any more but they have an ongoing arrangement. They will go to a couple of things together - things that were planned before they split and which William will honour.

It seems a bit of a habit among that set not to entirely sever relationships. There's rarely a clean break."

As we reported last week, William will go to the wedding of Kate's cousin on July 21. It is understood that they will also spend a weekend together in William's cottage in Balmoral in August.

Being in such close proximity to the man she once hoped to marry - and being so as 'just friends' - must be a prospect that Kate regards with profoundly mixed feelings.

However glossy her image and admirable her poise, there are, in the weight she has shed and the cigarettes she has started smoking again, clues to the effort required in presenting a positive face to the world she knows is watching still.

The importance of Pippa's place at Kate's side right now cannot, friends say, be underestimated.

"Pippa and Kate really are very close," says one. "Sure, they have a very like-minded approach to life and if Kate is leaning on Pippa at the moment who can blame her?

"The whole Middleton family were thinking of holidaying in Scotland this year but Kate felt it was too much of a thorny reminder of the last time that they were all together in Scotland, earlier this year, when they rented a great big house in Perthshire and waited for William to show up for New Year and he never did.

"Instead, they're looking at renting some fabulous villa in Tuscany or Umbria for a few weeks in August at the end of the summer.

"And goodness, I'd have thought by the time they reach August, the girls will need a break."

[felassan]

After The Blight

A timeline of the Hero of Ferelden’s movements and notes about their activities after the end of the Fifth Blight

I just wanted to collect it together somewhere. Obviously it does not apply if the Hero performed the Ultimate Sacrifice, although sections of it will apply to Orlesian Warden-Commanders. This is a mixture of canon information, suppositions and headcanons (so it’s a mix of a reference post and personal notes about my own HoF). The latter two things are clearly marked as such. This post has been updated. (Tevinter Nights spoilers under cut)

9:30 Dragon - Fifth Blight begins.

9:31 - Fifth Blight ends, events of DAO end. The Fereldan reign or service to the crown of Queen, Prince-Consort and Chancellor HoFs begins. The HoF studies the Blight. There is an investigation effort into the darkspawns’ remaining secrets.

supposition: shortly after the coronation of Ferelden’s new monarch[s], the HoF answers the First Warden’s summons to Weisshaupt and travels there to report about the Blight. if the Dark Ritual was performed, they avoid mentioning it, despite the pertinent questions they are asked about why no Warden died killing the Archdemon. suspicions in the order abound 

supposition: if Avernus continued his research in some form, the HoF begins working with him around this time

personal headcanon: Dog never left HoF’s side after the Blight, because why would he? I know what it says about replenishing in the kennels, but that could easily be done during HoF’s many trips to Denerim

9:31, 4 months post Blight - Zevran has now begun his quest to dismantle the Crows, so romanced Zevran has most likely left HoF’s company by this point.

9:31, 6 months post Blight - Queen HoF marries Alistair in lavish ceremony. If Alistair was romanced, they then tour Ferelden. Prince-Consort HoF marries Anora in lavish ceremony.

note - The timings of the events in the expansion, DLCs and DA2 Act 1 are a bit squashed and inconsistent, which is why things in the upcoming segment get a bit janky

17th of Ferventis, 9:31, 6 months post Blight, post royal wedding - The Darkspawn Civil War/Amaranthine Conflict and the events of Awakening begin. The HoF had been promoted to Commander of the Grey, Ferelden’s Warden-Commander. They travel to Vigil’s Keep having been tasked by the order with rebuilding the Wardens’ presence in Ferelden and dealing with the remaining darkspawn plaguing the nation. Romanced Warden Alistair could not join them as he had been assigned to the Warden parties in charge of the Thaw Hunt (a hunt for remnant darkspawn pockets). Romanced Zevran could not join them as he was away hunting and being hunted by the Crows. Romanced Leliana could not join as she was summoned for an audience by the Grand Cleric.

supposition: HoF’s promotion was given to them during their time at Weisshaupt. it’s both a reward for their service during the Blight and a maneuver by the First Warden to capitalize on the HoF’s reputation and the post-Blight state of Ferelden (which was weakened and freshly appreciative of Wardens). the goal was to leverage the Wardens back into prominence and power in Ferelden

9:31, 12 months post Blight - This basically brings things into ~9:32. The Darkspawn Civil War/Amaranthine Conflict and events of Awakening end. If the Architect was spared, other Wardens in other nations are appalled, but the Wardens think the ensuing conflict between groups of darkspawn might make the Deep Roads safer. If the Architect was spared, HoF begins work of some kind with the intelligent darkspawn and has interactions with them in the coming years (in 9:37, Warden Nathaniel calls these darkspawn “The Warden’s allies” and mentions information these allies provided the Wardens with). Soon after what happened with the Architect, if Avernus continued his research in some form, HoF sends him information about the Architect.

personal headcanon: HoF names Nathaniel Howe their second-in-command. Nathaniel becomes Constable of the Grey, Warden-Constable of Ferelden

favored headcanon: HoF names romanced or befriended Warden Alistair their second-in-command. Alistair becomes Constable of the Grey, Warden-Constable of Ferelden

9:31 - If Avernus continued his research in some form, Hawke finds a very important set of Warden letters and documents from the HoF intended for the First Warden, on a dead body on the Wounded Coast in the Free Marches. HoF dispatched the messenger from Ferelden via Amaranthine to go to Weisshaupt by way of Kirkwall, possibly with the aid of an agent in Kirkwall. The courier was most likely dispatched from Vigil’s Keep. Something had happened that the HoF is concerned about and wanted to inform the First Warden of ASAP. Enclosed was a message from Avernus to the HoF. This message indicates that the HoF has been working and corresponding with Avernus to aid his research, including sending him shipments of supplies. Avernus’ research has made progress but also revealed some alarming implications, and he urged the HoF to inform the FW at once. 

supposition: “supplies” includes live subjects, as in sentient beings (Ghilan’nain would be proud)

supposition: due to everything with Avernus if he continued his research, it’s around now that seeds begin to be sown in HoF’s mind of finding a way to escape the Calling 

personal headcanon: the agent in Kirkwall is Varric Tethras, or one of his people. after all, he is an information broker, spymaster and someone who knows everyone

~9:31 - The events of The Golems of Amgarrak take place. HoF investigates Amgarrak Thaig after being invited to Orzammar by Jerrik Dace, on a search mission to find a lost expedition. Most likely takes place after Awakening because Jerrik sent a letter requesting aid to Vigil’s Keep.

personal headcanon: the HoF has contact here with House Tethras, who canonically funded Jerrik’s search mission

9:32, nearly 1 year after the Archdemon’s death - The events of Witch Hunt take place. HoF searches for Morrigan through the Korcari Wilds, Cadash Thaig, Kinloch Hold and the Dragonbone Wastes. If HoF romanced Morrigan, they may vanish with her through the eluvian. In some universes Kieran has now been born. For some HoFs, they now meet their son for the first time.

supposition: it’s now that Morrigan tells some HoFs about the leads she found that point to the western lands as a place where a cure for the Calling might be found. if HoF didn’t leave through the mirror, some HoFs may now find that the “gift” Morrigan left them along with the stolen Dalish book is information about these leads. do note that some HoFs are implied to have come into the knowledge without Morrigan’s involvement

supposition: 9:32, post Witch Hunt - It’s now that HoFs who romanced Zevan travel to Antiva to reunite with him for a time, their expansion and DLC-business being concluded. they do what they can to help him in his Crow quest

9:32 on, for a time - HoFs who romanced Morrigan, fathered Kieran and left through the mirror help Morrigan raise Kieran for a while. This goes on for a long enough time that the roughly ~10 year old Kieran clearly remembers his father in 9:41.

supposition: much of this family life took place in hidden, secret places, some of which are in Thedas ‘proper’ itself and some of which are in the Crossroads and places reached via the Crossroads

supposition [?]: 9:32 on, til leaving / ‘mysteriously vanishing’ in ~9:40 - HoF most likely based out of Denerim Royal Palace and/or Vigil’s Keep, being largely occupied in this period with the duties involved in being Queen, Prince-Consort, Chancellor and/or Warden-Commander of Ferelden. The former would involve such things as advising, often being seen at court, helping to rebuild Ferelden in the wake of the Blight, and resisting the influence/incursions Orlais attempt around this time. The latter would involve such things as recruitment, training, establishing bases, sending annual reports to Weisshaupt, scouting, clearing remnant darkspawn activity, rebuilding Vigil’s Keep and/or Amaranthine, overseeing the arling etc. It’s also likely that Warden business would take them to other parts of Thedas at times. Romanced Zevran and romanced Leliana both assist when they can with rebuilding the Wardens, without officially joining. Depending on HoF’s actions during the Darkspawn Civil War/Amaranthine Conflict, potential events such as a riot of common folk at Vigil’s Keep can occur here. HoF continuing to actively serve in the Wardens during this time probably isn’t just supposition due to how they and Warden Alistair can refer to their duties in 9:41. Still, there’s lots of space and flexibility in this period for headcanon, for example to include things from the ‘rumors’ and such listed at the end of this post.

supposition: HoFs who romanced Zevan are involved on and off as they are able in this time period with his Crow quest, helping when they can. “on and off” refers to their involvement in his quest, not their relationship. canonically around this period Zevran is known for high profile kills of Guildmasters and having some of the others in his pocket. by 9:34 he has 2 out of 7 Guildmasters in his pocket and has killed at least one other along with Eoman, 2 Grandmasters, and 4 other members of House Arainai

personal headcanon: HoF establishes Soldier’s Peak as a secondary and proper functioning Warden base in Ferelden, and it comes to rival Vigil’s Keep

personal headcanon: HoF grows increasingly dissatisfied with the actions and attitudes of the Wardens (primarily the First Warden and other leadership in the Anderfels) during this period, and in the later years begins to consider making a play for power and seizing the First Warden’s seat

~9:33, 1 year after Darkspawn Civil War/Amaranthine Conflict ends - If HoF saved the city of Amaranthine, it is finished being rebuilt. Relevant because it is part of the arling goings-on, which is currently in HoF’s hands.

personal headcanon: 9:34 - HoF visits their clan near Kirkwall, having sent word ahead to Merrill. HoF is able to see Merrill and Marethari again prior to Marethari’s death in Act 3. this ties in handily with the timeframe when Warden Stroud/Alistair passes through Kirkwall on a mysterious important Warden mission. HoF, in the company of this Warden party (which includes Warden Carver), meets Hawke and is reunited with Anders/Justice and Isabela. HoF meets their contact Varric in person for the first time

~9:36, 5 years after Darkspawn Civil War/Amaranthine Conflict ends - If HoF saved the city of Amaranthine, Vigil’s Keep is finally finished being rebuilt.

supposition: ~9:37 (dependent on when Hawke did MoTA) - Not long after Hawke kills Corpheus, HoF begins digging for information about him much like the DAI Warden contact. HoF is investigating rumors they had heard and found about him, being concerned that he would be able to jump host bodies on death like an Archdemon. This happens in romanced Warden Alistair worlds in tandem with Alistair, and I don’t see why it would be exclusive to those. This can technically occur anytime between 31 and 37, but 37 makes the most sense for this to happen, as I can’t see HoF sitting on Corypheus knowledge for almost a decade before he rose

9:37 - Queen HoF is at home in the Royal Palace in Denerim when King Alistair meets Hawke in Act 3.

supposition: Prince-Consort HoFs, Chancellor HoFs, HoFs who remained King Alistair’s paramour, HoFs who were friends with King Alistair and potentially some others are also at court in Denerim at this time, either visiting or in a less temporary manner, depending

9:37 - Hawke meets Warden Nathaniel and possibly their Warden sibling in the Deep Roads. The First Warden had ordered an investigation along Hawke’s Deep Road expedition route, as Hawke went further into the Roads than anyone believed possible and the Wardens are interested in the primeval thaig. The Wardens obtained directions from Bartrand and were prepared to do extensive excavations around the thaig using explosives.

supposition: HoF had some involvement in the above, for example overseeing, organizing and decision-making on a level more local than the First Warden’s initial order

personal headcanon: Hawke’s Warden sibling has been under HoF’s command in recent years

personal headcanon: 9:38 - HoF accompanies Alistair during the events of The Silent Grove, Those Who Speak, and Until We Sleep. these events canonically take longer than 3 weeks, probably ~2 months. their travels take them to Antiva City, the Tellari Swamps, Ventus, Seheron and the Fade. HoF is reunited with Sten and Isabela, and meets Maevaris

~9:40, before Cassandra interrogates Varric - HoF departs on their long-ass quest to the west to find a cure for the Calling. Romanced Zevran accompanies them. Their journey takes them far out of the areas where Corypheus is operating, to lands untouched by Blight. Cassandra initially seeks HoF now, but cannot find them, most likely because they’ve left. Romanced Leliana couldn’t go because Justinia called on her for help. Romanced Warden Alistair stays behind to investigate the mounting concerns in the Wardens with corruption in the ranks, Corypheus, Wardens disappearing and the false Calling.

supposition [?]: Awakening Warden companions that we’ve not heard from again - so Velanna, Sigrun and Oghren - accompany HoF on their quest, explaining why they haven’t resurfaced

personal headcanon: in the months prior, HoF began to grow concerned about stirrings of strange behavior in Warden ranks, much like the DAI Warden contact

9:41 - A letter arrives to Weisshaupt from the new Warden-Commander of Vigil’s Keep. Around this time Clarel is noted to have stopped writing to Weisshaupt.

supposition: there is a new Warden-Commander because HoF has now departed on their quest. the new one could be temporary in the interim or a permanent replacement. the new one is possibly whoever HoF promoted to Constable of the Grey / Warden-Constable of Ferelden, as Wardens of this rank are second-in-commands who step in when the Warden-Commander is away. [headcanon note here: if HoF had elevated Alistair to the position, it’s possibly now occupied by someone else given Warden Alistair soon goes into hiding after becoming concerned]

9:41, mid-Inquisition - It proves difficult, but Morrigan, Alistair or Leliana facilitate Inquisition contact with the HoF and an exchange of letters between HoF and the Inquisitor. HoF signs their letter “Warden-Commander”.

supposition: given how they sign the letter, it doesn’t seem that they have officially stepped down from the role yet. alternatively, a Warden can continue to use the title after stepping down, or this is an inconsistency. I think it’s most likely the new Warden-Commander in the Weisshaupt letter above is acting-WC at this time point

~9:44, post-Trespasser - HoF has returned from their quest to find a cure. If they romanced Leliana, they rejoin her. If Leliana is Divine, HoF is often seen at her side. If not, their respective responsibilities often keep them apart, but whenever they can they spend time together at a villa on the Waking Sea.

supposition: HoF didn’t come back until now, as they are not mentioned in the base game epilogue. their quest really took years

supposition: All HoFs return now, because why would only Lelimancers make it back?

supposition: HoF found a cure, given the fairly light tone in the romanced Leliana epilogues. if so, they probably step down from being a Warden, as Fiona was not allowed to remain in the Wardens after being cured

supposition: If HoF romanced Morrigan or Alistair or married Anora, they instead rejoin their respective LI, or LI and child in the case of Morrigan sometimes. Leliana, Morrigan and Warden Alistair as LIs in DAI all express the same sentiment of what amounts to “this time, when we rejoin one another, we intend to stay together”. romanced Zevran here was already with them, having gone on the quest

supposition: At this time point HoF clearly still has some continuing responsibilities of some form. work with the Wardens in an advisory capacity? ongoing service to the Fereldan crown? there’s lots of space and flexibility now for headcanon, for example to include things from the ‘rumors’ and such listed at the end of this post

supposition: It appears Leliana tells romanced HoF of the troubles to come (’for both saw the troubles that were to come’). presumably this is a reference to the Dread Wolf and related threats. I assume she would tell this to any HoF that she was good friends with

personal headcanon: the cure for the Calling is distributed to Anders and Carver. whether it’s distributed to all Wardens or made common knowledge to all Wardens is debatable

personal headcanon: HoF ‘takes care of’ some of befriended Divine Leliana’s enemies. I especially favor this headcanon with romanced Leliana

~9:44, post-Trespasser, probably into 9:45 - ‘The Bard’ reports a sighting of an unspecified Warden-Commander in an auctionhouse in Llomerryn, talking to disguised Divine Victoria. This Warden-Commander’s identity is left unstated, and this story of the Bard’s, or this part of the story, seems like it was made up.

supposition: this was made up and never happened, given the context. I do love the allusion to the apparent contact and scheming between HoF and romanced or befriended Divine Leliana, though

----------

There are also lots of things that the HoF was rumored or can be suggested to do post-game in the DAO and expansion epilogues. If desired, these could easily be woven into headcanons and stories to help fill the periods where there are large timegaps. You could also headcanon in HoF appearing with romanced Zevran and romanced Leliana at various timepoints when they resurface in the narrative, for example.

continue to have unspecified adventures and travels

travel with Sten to Par Vollen

travel with Wynne and Shale

dwarves: return to Orzammar, potentially Paragon duties

Mahariel: return to their clan

Tabris: potentially Bann of the Alienage duties

Cousland: return to Highever, help Fergus rebuild

and so forth

[watusichris]

Betty Davis: They Say She’s Different

It appears that everything anyone has written for the old Music Aficionado site has now disappeared from the web. A random Facebook post has prompted me to re-purpose this story, written in 2016, about my favorite funketress. **********

To this day, the name Betty Davis – Betty with a “y,” that is – remains best known to connoisseurs of Miles Davis minutiae and ‘70s funk obsessives. While it’s true that Betty played an important off-stage role in the career of the jazz trumpeter, to whom she was married for just a year, and she undoubtedly made some of the best hardcore funk records of her era, she deserves to be recognized beyond the relatively narrow provinces of the jazzbo and the crate-digger.

Uncompromising, intelligent, brazen, aggressive, and not incidentally gorgeous, sexually provocative, and a fashion plate always ahead of the curve, Betty was a prophetic figure. Spawned by the explosion of music, fashion, and alternative culture of the late ‘60s, and by concurrent leaps in black consciousness and feminism, she was a take-no-prisoners singer and writer who presented herself as something new, rich, and strange with her self-titled debut album in 1973.

There were some badass contemporaries working the soul and funk trenches– gutter-tongued diva Millie Jackson and one-time James Brown paramour Yvonne Fair leap to mind immediately – but they seemed to be adapting tropes previously worked by male singers in the genres. Betty still sounds like something new: a tough, smart, demanding woman who reveled in pleasure and insisted on satisfaction, unafraid to claim what she wanted.

Despite the fact that she was associated with some high-profile male musician friends and lovers – beyond Davis, the roll call included Hugh Masekela, Jimi Hendrix, Sly Stone, Mike Carabello, Eric Clapton, and Robert Palmer – she was no groupie or bed-hopping climber. Possessed of her own self-defining vision, she was producing her own records and leading a tight, flexible little band by the end of her brief run.

In 1976, after completing four splendid albums (only three of which were released at the time), she disappeared, not only from the music business but from the public eye entirely. What happened? It’s an old story that many women in the industry will recognize: Her record company didn’t know what to do with her, and wanted her to tone down her act. Betty Davis wasn’t having any of that, thank you, and she hit the damn road.

She was born Betty Mabry in Durham, NC, in 1945. She grew up country, and was exposed to down-home, get-down music early. On the title track of her second album, They Say I’m Different, she runs down the artists who served as inspirations: Big Mama Thornton, John Lee Hooker, Lightnin’ Hopkins, Howlin’ Wolf, Albert King, Chuck Berry. The blues, in one form or another, is the backbone of her style.

Her family relocated to Pittsburgh when she was young, but at 16 she left home for the Fashion Institute of Technology in New York. There she was hurtled into the roiling cultural vortex of the Village. She took up modeling, working for the toney Wilhelmina agency, and began running with a posse of similarly disposed, equally beautiful women who called themselves the “Electric Ladies.” Sound familiar? One of her closest cohorts was Devon Wilson, for many years a notorious consort of Jimi Hendrix known for her freewheeling, outré sex- and drug-saturated lifestyle.

Mabry began to try her hand at singing, and cut a few self-penned singles. They were in an old-school mold in terms of structure, but her very first 45 hints at things to come. “Get Ready For Betty,” a 1964 track released by Don Costa (discoverer of Paul Anka and Trini Lopez and a key arranger for Frank Sinatra), is stodgy early-‘60s NYC R&B to its core, but its message is pointed: “Get out my way, girl, ‘cause I’m comin’ to take your man.”

She also made a stolid romantic duet ballad with singer Roy Arlington and, produced by cult soul man Lou Courtney, a homage to the Cellar, the New York club where she DJed. But she didn’t start reaching the upper echelon of the music biz until one of her songs, a hymn to Harlem called “Uptown,” was cut by the Chambers Brothers for their smash 1968 album The Time Has Come, which also included the psychedelic soul workout “Time Has Come Today.”

The Chambers association probably secured a singles deal for her at Columbia Records, and her first session for the major label was produced by her former live-in boyfriend, South African trumpeter Masekela, in October 1968. By that time, she had split with him: A month earlier, she had married a far more famous horn player, Miles Davis, whom she had met in 1967. Davis and his regular producer Teo Macero would head her second session for Columbia in May 1969.

Those two dates were released for the first time as The Columbia Years 1968-1969 earlier this month by Light in the Attic, the independent label that has restored Betty’s entire catalog to print over the last decade. While devoted fans can be grateful that the work is finally seeing the light of day, it does not make for easy listening, for it was clearly made by people groping in the dark.

Betty’s artistic persona was at that point completely unformed, and so her male Svengalis did their best to mold the clay in their hands, with feeble results. Masekela evidently completed just three tracks, two of which, “It’s My Life” and “Live, Love, Learn,” were issued as a flop single. The homiletic song titles give the game away; the music, straight-up commercial soul backed by a large group (which included Wilton Felder and Wayne Henderson of the Jazz Crusaders and Masekela), has nothing original to say.

The date with Miles is a bigger waste, if a more spectacular one. The personnel couldn’t have been more glittering: Hendrix sidemen Billy Cox and Mitch Mitchell; ex-Detroit Wheels guitarist Jim McCarty; bassist Harvey Brooks, studio familiar of Bob Dylan and former member of the Electric Flag; and Davis’ then-current or future band mates Herbie Hancock, Wayne Shorter, John McLaughlin, and Larry Young.

But nothing jells. The material is either weak (Betty’s directionless original “Hangin’ Out” is the best of a bad lot) or incongruous (lumbering covers of Cream’s “Politician” and Creedence’s “Born On the Bayou”). Worse, the jazzers are unable to lay down anything resembling a solid soul-rock foundation, and even reliable timekeeper Mitchell blows the groove on more than one occasion. Miles gets impatient with his spouse at one point, rasping over the talk-back, “Sing it just like that, with the gum in your mouth and all, bitch.”

Apparently intended as demos, the failed tracks were consigned to the tape library. By late ’69, Miles and Betty’s marriage was history. She left her mark on his music: She appeared on the cover of his cover of his 1968 album Filles de Kilimanjaro and inspired its extended track “Mademoiselle Mabry” (based on the chords that opens Hendrix’s “The Wind Cries Mary”) and “Back Seat Betty” from his 1981 comeback album The Man With the Horn.

Moreover, she moved him toward the flash style that would dominate his music through the mid-‘70s, by exposing him to the slamming music of Hendrix and Sly and exchanging his continental suits for psychedelic pimp togs. Would we know Bitches Brew, On the Corner, and Agharta without Betty Davis? Maybe, maybe not.

For her part, Betty remained in the wings for a while. She collaborated on demos for the Commodores; in London, she modeled, worked on songs for Marc Bolan of T. Rex, and declined a production offer from her then-paramour Clapton. Drifting back to New York, she met Santana percussionist Carabello. They became involved romantically, and in 1972 she relocated to the San Francisco Bay area, where Carabello’s local connections led to the formation of a stellar band to back her on a debut album.

One reads the credits for Betty Davis in awe. The rhythm section was the Family Stone’s dissident, puissant rhythm section, bassist Larry Graham and drummer Greg Errico (who also produced). Original Santana guitarist Neal Schon, future Mandrill axe man Doug Rodrigues, founding Graham Central Station organist Hershall Kennedy, and keyboardist and ace Jerry Garcia collaborator Merl Saunders filled out the instrumentation. The Pointer Sisters, Sylvester, and Kathi McDonald were among a large platoon of backup vocalists.

Issued in 1973 by Just Sunshine Records, an independent label owned by Woodstock Festival promoter Michael Lang (who also released a set by another unique woman, folk singer-guitarist Karen Dalton), Betty Davis was one hell of a coming-out party. Since her abortive Columbia dates, she had developed a unique vocal attack that could leap from a velvety croon to a Tina Turner-like shriek in a nanosecond. The stomping funk of the studio band backed her up to the hilt.

Like Turner, she was one Bold Soul Sister. The lust-filled opening invitation “If I’m in Luck I Might Get Picked Up” announces that a new game was afoot. The statement of romantic/sexual independence “Anti Love Song,” the lovers’ chess match “Your Man My Man,” and the self-explanatory “Game is My Middle Name” offer up a startling, hard-edged new model of a hard-funking female vocalist.

The album’s most affecting track may be “Steppin in Her I. Miller Shoes,” Davis’ level-headed elegy for her sybaritic friend Devon Wilson, who sailed out a window at the Chelsea Hotel in 1971. “She coulda been anything that she wanted…Instead she chose to be nothing,” Davis sings, implying that route wouldn’t be one she would take herself.

“If I’m in Luck” grazed the lower reaches of the R&B singles chart and the album failed to reach the LP rolls at all, but Davis was undaunted. For 1974’s They Say I’m Different, she took the producer’s reins, which she would hold for the rest of her career. While the backup lineup is less glitzy (though Saunders, Pete Escovedo, and Buddy Miles, on guitar no less, appear), the support is still sizzling; crackling drums and burbling clavinet put over a set of songs that may have been even stronger than those heard on her debut.

No one who hears “He Was a Big Freak” is likely to ever forget it; it’s a startling dissection of a masochistic relationship -- inspired by Jimi Hendrix, and not, as many have assumed, by Miles Davis (“Everyone knows that Miles is a sadist,” Betty remarked later). Almost as notable are “Don’t Call Her No Tramp,” a prescient condemnation of what we now call slut-shaming, and the autobiographical title track, with slicing slide guitar work by Cordell Dudley.

Different and its attendant singles tanked, but Betty managed to maintain her profile with live gigs noteworthy for their uninhibited bawdiness, on-stage abandon, and the star’s Egyptian-princess-from-outer-space wardrobe sense. By early 1974 she had assembled a hot, lean road band that included her cousins Nickey Neal and Larry Johnson on drums and bass, respectively, plus keyboardist Fred Mills and guitarist Carlos Morales. This lineup would back her on her last two albums.

The end of Just Sunshine’s distribution deal liberated Davis, who, at the suggestion of then-boyfriend Robert Palmer, inked with Palmer’s label Island Records. The company released Nasty Gal in 1975, and it may be Davis’ best-executed work. The pared-down backing lets the songs shine, and there are good ones here: The shameless title song, the vituperative blast at the critics “Dedicated to the Press,” and the out-front ultimatum for sexual satisfaction “Feelins” get right up in the listener’s face. The most surprising track is the ballad “You and I,” an unexpected songwriting reunion with Miles, orchestrated by the trumpeter’s famed arranger Gil Evans.

It’s a tremendous album, and Betty supported it with live shows that ate the funk competition alive. A bootleg of an especially out-there set recorded at a festival on the French Riviera in 1976 literally climaxes with Nasty Gal’s “The Lone Ranger,” an in-the-saddle heavy breather that Davis wraps up by feigning a loud orgasm.

One should remember that at this particular juncture, Madonna was studying dance at the University of Michigan.

But Nasty Gal faded with hardly a trace, and Davis’ relationship with Island swiftly became fractious. It’s easy to see why the label declined to issue her final album, originally called Crashin’ From Passion and ultimately released, after years as a bootleg, by Light in the Attic in 2009 as Is It Love or Desire. The collection, which leans heavily on songs about sex, doping, and heavy drinking, includes “Stars Starve, You Know,” an outright condemnation of the games record companies play:

They said if I wanted to make some money

I’d have to change my style

Put a paper bag over my face

Sing soft and wear tight fitting gowns

 They don’t like the way I’m lookin’

So it’s hard for my agent to get me bookin’s

Unless I cover up my legs and drop my pen

And commit one of those commercial sins…

 Oh hey hey Island

And that was all she wrote. Until writers began to seek her out in the new millennium as her records became available again, Betty Davis was an invisible woman, one who had blazed a trail that other talents, such as Prince and Madonna, would blaze more profitably after her. She was definitively ahead of her time.

Asked by one writer what she had done since leaving music, Davis, who turns 71 on July 26, responded with the most tragic thing one can imagine any artist saying: “Nothing really.”

[casualcreationgentlemen]

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Saw something in the further reading section of Michael Kulikowski’s Imperial Tragedy (Profile, 2019) today:

There are countless books on the fall of the western Roman empire, and more appear annually, with variable scholarly trappings but nearly all quite conventional. Still, ripping yarns and neo-Victorian analyses can be found in any bookshop. So, for those so inclined, can thinly disguised nativist tracts on how immigration (and ‘immigrant violence’) brought down the empire. To name names would be invidious.

I thought this was a dig at Peter Heather, Professor of Medieval History at King’s College London and author of The Fall of the Roman Empire (Oxford, 2005) and Empires and Barbarians (Oxford, 2009), so I looked it up and discovered that not only was I right, but Kulikowski has serious beef with the guy:

Peter Heather has been fiercely criticized by members of the so-called Toronto School of History. Michael Kulikowski, who belongs to this group, has accused Heather of neo-romanticism and of wishing "to revive a biological approach to ethnicity". Kulikowski claims that Heather "manifests a clear methodological affinity" to the 19th-century writer of the Goths Henry Bradley.

But Kulikowki’s beef is nothing next to the righteous fury of Guy Halsall, Professor of History at the University of York:

Guy Halsall has identified Peter Heather as the leader of a "counter-revisionist offensive against more subtle ways of thinking" about the Migration Period. Halsall accuses this group, which is strongly associated with University of Oxford, of "bizarre reasoning" and of purveying a "deeply irresponsible history". Halsall writes that Heather and the Oxford historians have been responsible for "an academic counter-revolution" of wide importance, and accuses them of deliberately contributing to the rise of "far-right extremists".

Halsall got so mad at Heather, first at the 2011 Leeds International Medieval Conference and then online, at his blog, that he threatened to leave academia entirely:

Well, it's more or less a year since I started doing this blogging lark 'seriously' (the inverted commas are obviously necessary).  And, as they say, what a roller-coaster of a year it's been.  I've shut down the blog twice, brought it back twice, come to the verge of formal complaints being sent to my university twice (once justifiably, once most certainly not), lost at least one friend, lost 99% of the respect I had for someone I had hitherto held in high esteem, quite possibly lost the chance of a job I wanted because of this blog, taken some pretty visceral abuse, and so on.  All good fun!

On the other hand I have learnt some lessons.  One is that even bastards have feelings.  Another is that if you have twenty-odd followers and maybe 100 hits a day, that (allowing for hits from people looking for something else, like Elizabeth Kostova's novel The Historian or ever-popular balding guitarist The Edge) does not mean that  only twenty or thirty people in the whole wide world read your blog.   Thus you need to be a bit more careful about what you say and how you say it.  I've also learnt that eminent historians don't always read what you write very carefully, and just how deeply-ingrained the elitist culture of the British historical profession is, as well as just how few principles are actually held by the overwhelming majority of the practitioners of said profession.  And this in response to something that I actually thought long and hard about how I wrote.

And as a result of all this I have realised that no good is going to come of me continuing to smack my head against the glass ceiling that those of us not from 'a particular socio-educational background' (you know the one) eventually run up against.  I have instead come to the decision, essentially, to give up on it and 'seek my fortune' elsewhere than in the confines of the academic career-path, as it is now constructed in the UK at any rate.*  I'm actually quite excited about this as I think it offers a lot of possibilities, creatively and ethically.  It's been a liberating decision.  Those of you who know that I set most store by the writings of those co-opted into the canon of the existentialists (almost none of whom ever called themselves by that name) will appreciate exactly why I am proud of this decision.

To some extent it makes up for the bad faith I showed in backing down and removing my post on why it matters to get angry about the lazy and irresponsible (indeed, yes, just downright knuckle-headed) way in which some historians in and/or produced by our most prestigious Thames Valley-based university write about politically and socially sensitive topics like migrations.

Halsall ultimately sanitized the 2011 IMC paper that started the war with Heather --  the neutered version is still up on his blog -- but the original was apparently quite something:

Perhaps unsurprisingly for those who’ve heard him speak or read him on the Internet, this was the one that really started the war. [Edit: and, indeed, some changes have been made to these paragraphs by request of one of those involved.] The consequences, if not of this actual speech, at least of its subsequent display on the Internet, have been various, unpleasant and generally regrettable, and I don’t want any of them myself.

Thankfully, the purged parts of the original were reproduced by some noble soul on the Civilization Fanatics forums before they were lost to the ages:

Thus we can have Ward-Perkins’ sneering parody of late antiquity studies and Peter Heather’s distortions of counter-arguments. In many people’s minds the choices before us are evidently, either, that nothing happened, or, that there was a huge catastrophe caused entirely by invading barbarians. Obviously this is not the case. Plenty of people other than me -- most famously, Walter Pohl -- have written about serious, dramatic change happening in the fifth century without blaming it on the barbarians and without denying that there were migrations in the fifth century. Yet this -- if I dare call it such -- third way seems nevertheless to be very much a minority position.

But I am not convinced that a simple lack of exposure to sensible alternatives really explains the continuing, fanatical devotion to the idea of the barbarian migrations, especially outside the academy.

I have recently said that:

“When a British historian places an argument that the Roman Empire fell because of the immigration of large numbers of barbarians next to arguments that the end of Rome was the end of civilisation and that we need to take care to preserve our own civilisation, when another British historian writes sentences saying “the connection between immigrant violence and the collapse of the western Empire could not be more direct” [a direct quote from Peter Heather’s Empires and Barbarians (Oxford, 2009)], and especially when the arguments of both involve considerable distortions of the evidence to fit their theories, one cannot help but wonder whether these authors are wicked, irresponsible or merely stupid.”

Obviously, these are not mutually exclusive alternatives.

Are these writers setting themselves up as ideologues of the xenophobic Right or have they simply not realised the uses to which such careless thinking and phrasing can be put? You can draw your own conclusions, although it is worth noting that Ward-Perkins has been happy enough to write on this subject for the neo-liberal magazine Standpoint, which regularly publishes pieces attacking multiculturalism. There comes a point when one has to admit that actually the most charitable explanation for all this really is that these writers are simply a bit dim.

Outside academic circles, it is certainly the case that the adhesion to the idea of barbarian invasion has a heavily right-wing political dimension. Apart from the barbarians’ role as metaphor, already discussed, it is worth, very briefly, thinking about the other reasons why people are so ready to pin the blame on the barbarians. Slavoj Zizek’s Lacanian analysis of antisemitism provides some valuable ways forward. Essentially, the barbarian, like the figure of the Jew, acts as a screen between the subject and a confrontation with the Real, which Zizek sees, slightly differently from Lacan, as the pre-symbolised; things that haven’t been or can’t or won’t be encompassed in a world view. Zizek showed that arguments that “the Jews aren’t like that” are almost never effective against anti-Semites because what real Jews (or actual immigrants, one might say) are like is not the point. Similarly, arguments about the empirical reality of the fifth-century cut little weight with those wedded to the idea of Barbarian Invasion. Just as the anti-Semite takes factual evidence as more proof of the existence of the international Zionist conspiracy, the right-wing devotee of the Barbarian Invasions sees factual counter-arguments as manifestations of the liberal, left-wing academy peddling its dangerous multicultural political correctness. I have read a great deal of this on internet discussion lists -- including a review of my own book, and one of James O’Donnell’s! Michael Kulikowski received a similarly-phrased review from a right-wing academic ancient historian.

The barbarian is the classic “subject presumed to”. The barbarian can change the world; he can bring down empires; he can create kingdoms. The barbarian dominates history. “He” is not like “us”, enmeshed in our laws, our little lives and petty responsibilities. The barbarians -- and you only need to read Peter Heather to see this -- are peoples with “coherent aims” (a quote), which they set out single-mindedly to achieve. No people in the whole of recorded human history have ever had single coherent sets of aims. Well -- none other than the barbarians anyway.

Halsall has never resiled from his belief that Heather was essentially a fascist, nor backed away from his commitment to resign from his post in righteous indignation -- maybe not in 2011, or 2019, but certainly by 2023 at the very latest:

My anger about all this is justly infamous but has been badly misrepresented.  I do think that some things are worth getting angry about, and the misuse of the Barbarian Migrations and the End of the Roman Empire to fuel xenophobia and racism, and the way some modern authors pander to this, is one such.  However, to look at the origins of this ire and animus, I invite you to compare my engagement with Peter Heather’s work in Barbarian Migrations, and its tone, with Heather’s engagement – if you can call it that – with my work, and its tone, in Empires and Barbarians.  I never expect to be agreed with; I do expect basic academic courtesy to be reciprocated.  If people see fit to treat me intellectually as a second-class citizen, the gloves will come off.  That may stem from my own biography as (unlike so many) a first-generation academic not educated at the 'right' schools and universities, but there we are.  I will be leaving the profession within the next four years (well done, guys) so I have nothing to lose by not apologising for that.

Kulikowski might have gotten in a good dig, but Halsall will always be a true master of the art of Being Mad Online.