#that's what makes this funnier 💀

[xanyiaz]

guys i found myself /j 💀💀

[chloesimaginationthings]

Yall ever think about how Nightmare bb is canon in FNAF

[lanshappycorner]

when lance becomes a divine visionary, i think it would be cute if he came back from work and just quietly sits there and stares at dot (he's healing his soul by looking at his cute boyfriend)

[kadextra]

Poor q!Cellbit 😭 this is the second time he’s gotten jumpscared

[dixidin]

Jumping up and down in the air after I saw the new tommyinnit video I support this man's call out era

[bredforloyalty]

"cal's not even that much of an alcoholic like i won't liken it to an illness that runs in the family if it's not that bad in the first place c'mon now" me before remembering the insane drunk driving and gay bar shenanigans

[mukuharakazui]

bg3 is crazy for being a massive $70 larian + wotc collab game whose accessibility menu features subtitles that are present for less than half of all idle character dialogue and almost zero battle dialogue

[anders-hawke]

i think tim finally peaked 💀

[twistedappletree]

absolutely losing my shit remembering that person who tried to rp as jin ling with the lan sizhui chat bot and the first thing LSZ did was go over to JL and kiss him on the forehead

[crispycreambacon]

Gobo Fraggle you and your family are so Filipino to me

[kuragesoda]

Just imagine your mother going "aww sweetheart are you okay ? You've barely touched your hypmic rice" and then she tries to cheer you up by playing Drops by ramuda amemura from the hit rice making company hypnosis mic

HIT RICE MAKING COMPANYDJGJF 💀💀💀💀

[princekirijo]

OK I get all the Ginza line memes now that was so unnecessarily hard to get to 💀

[woulddieforloki]

new favorite fake celeb account tactic: "my management stole my phone so I had to make a new account because I don't have my phone but I do have insta access somehow but for some reason I don't have access to my main"

[athforskz]

How To Ruin Designer - Hwang Hyunjin

Masterlist

pairing: idol Versace prince Hyunjin x afab reader

wc: 1.7k

type: requested. Smut with little plot.

warnings: mention of alcohol consumption, fingering (f. rec), unprotected, anal play, foot play, anal penetration (f. rec), squirting. MDNI! I think that’s it?

not proof-read

a/n: This was inspired by when Hyunjin admitted he was drunk at the Versace after party. Rewatching those clips were so much funnier after finding that out 💀

Enjoy lovelies!

There was a feather light tickle on the crown of your head that made your eyes flutter open. It was Hyunjin peacefully sleeping, his chest pressed against your back and his face buried in your hair. The sun made your vision a little blurred as you came to, the memories from last night flooding back. You were still in last night’s dress, it being tight and uncomfortable to sleep in, but you looked stunning according to everyone else at the event. The after party left you and Hyunjin more than a little buzzed which explains being mostly clothed and barely making it to the bed last night. You rubbed the heel of your palms to your eyes as if wiping the remaining sleep from your face.

You went to move, but halted once Hyunjin groaned and pulled you closer. As tempting as it sounds to stay in bed with your beloved all day, you felt an overwhelming need to get out of last night’s dress and shower. If you were uncomfy, you could only imagine how restricted Hyunjin felt in his tight leather pants.

You went to move again then froze instantly, your butt pressed against something hard. Oh, that’s right… he didn’t feel all that restricted because his pants were halfway down his thighs. Your dress was halfway above your butt, and you could feel the tip of his hardened cock peek through the waistband of his boxers. No wonder you felt like your panties were out of place. You both may have been drunk last night but that definitely didn’t stop either of you from getting in a quick session before passing out.

With your cheeks thoroughly blushing, you tried once more to untangle yourself from your boyfriend’s form, “no leaving.” You startled at his gravely morning voice. When did he even wake up? “Hyune, I just want to get out of these clothes. I feel gross.” You immediately felt his hands slip along your back to reach the zipper of the dress, “what are you doing?” you inquired.

“What does it look like? You want it off so we’re getting it off.” He said matter-of-factly. You could practically hear the side-eye in his voice. “Well I wanted to take a shower too,” you murmured while scooting your way off the bed. His hands grabbed either side of your hips and pulled you back so forcefully that your upper back was flush with his toned chest. “I told you, no leaving. We can shower later, my love.” He mumbled with his lips kissing along your exposed back.

You couldn’t help the little moan that escaped once his lips made contact with your exposed skin. Your body was always more sensitive the morning after a night out. Maybe it was because of all the adrenaline previously rushing through your veins? Nevermind that, Hyunjin was making himself busy rubbing his hands down your hips to the front of your thighs, then snaking them up under your hiked dress.

“Jinnie, we can’t.. I’m still sore,” you weakly protested. Thighs snapping closed to shut out his hand, the action making him groan. “C’mon doll, ya know I can make you feel better. Wouldn’t you like that baby? I promise I’ll be gentle.” His voice was like velvet, so deep yet so smooth in the mornings. You’d do anything he says when he talks to you in that voice; well you would do anything for him regardless, but that’s beside the point. “Open up for me… that’s it,” he praised as you barely spread your legs for him to allow access for his slender fingers to reach that sweet cunt of yours.

Hyunjin’s touch was feather light as he ran his fingertips through your slick folds. Some of his cum from last night had leaked out of your entrance allowing his movements to be even more slippery than usual. “Fuck- Hyune,” you gasped once his middle and ring finger breached inside your walls. “Mmh?” He groaned as if asking a silent question while kissing along the curve of your waist, his tongue poking out of his mouth to trace your form. Hyunjin’s fingers repeatedly delved into your fluttering pussy in time with the languid strokes he circled onto your clit with his thumb. “T-too sensitive,” it came out as a whine. “I know baby, I know.” He marked each word with a kiss.

The hand that wasn’t working your core was free to push up your dress even further. The pesky piece of clothing getting in the way of your lover's next goal: your ass. Once exposed, Hyunjin sunk his teeth into the supple flesh causing your back to arch and your legs to kick. You took the opportunity to place the sole of your foot directly on his hard leaky tip. He hissed as he grinded his hardened length into your heel, the friction making his eyes roll back temporarily.

Even during his humping of your foot his hands never stopped their mission in pleasuring your body. He curved his fingers that were in your heat to massage that spongey spot that drove you wild and pushing you closer to the edge, “ah g’na cum p-please~” you bit your lip to keep from screaming. “Yeah? Go on, doll. Cum on my fingers,” Hyunjin pistoned his digits at a steady pace, but what sent you over the edge was the feeling of his warm wet tongue pressing against your tight rim. Your orgasm washed over you thoroughly causing a scream to rip from your throat and juices to gush into his palm.

“So fucking good, love.” He said with his tongue still lapping at your puckered hole, but you didn’t quite hear him because your head was in the clouds and your body seemed to turn into putty in Hyunjin’s hands. You hadn’t even noticed when he stopped and moved your body down so your butt pressed along his solid cock. The humping he did on your foot earlier had caused his boxers to fall further off his hips, now he had full access to you. Hyunjin’s heavy breath mirrored your own as he ran his member through your still gushing pussy. Every few strokes the tip would catch on your entrance causing your breath to hitch. You thought he’d eventually push in to your clenching heat, but he had other ideas.

Once his cock was thoroughly wetted he lined himself up, “babe, no please.. it’s still sore,” you pleaded half-heartedly. Hyunjin let out a snort, “won’t be the only thing that’s sore, baby.” You could hear the smirk in his voice and before you could grasp what he meant, it was too late. The end of his cock breached your other hole, making the both of you moan in unison. It’s not like this was the first time you and Hyunjin had done anal, but it was the first time you had done it with little to no prep. Regardless, you were very accustomed to Hyunjin’s dick and he knew your body would be able to adjust fine; that’s just the kind of trust you had in each other. Plus, you had an established safe word if it was actually too much.

“So damn tight, doll- fuck,” he groaned while sinking ever so slowly into your second entrance. You squealed as his cock filled you so well, anytime he was fully seated inside you your brain and body felt nothing but burning pleasure. Hyunjin was such a romantic that every time you both got intimate with each other the passion would be off the charts. He grabbed your chin, turning you back to connect your lips. Once adjusted to his full length you began circling your hips, Hyunjin swallowed every moan you let out.

Hyunjin lifted your top leg placing it back on his hip then used the same fingers that previously pumped your pussy to rub at your bundle of nerves. He started pulling his pelvis back to pump into your tightness and match your pace. Wet skin smacking echoed throughout the room along with his grunts, the sounds of sloppily making out, and your muffled moans. Each time you’d fully connect he could feel your ass jiggle on his lower abdomen and somehow that’s what drove him feral.

Hyunjin picked up the pace chasing his high while still drawing messy circles on your clit. You pulled away slightly from his mouth, still close enough to breathe each other’s air while whining louder at his assault on your tight hole. “H-hyune, baby slow d-down,” you whimpered. You reached a hand back to lightly push at his lower abdominals to tell him to ease up but really you didn’t want him to slow down. He knew you didn’t because you were so close and he could tell. “But you’re taking me so well. I know you wanna cum, baby. You always cum so hard when I fuck your sweet tight ass.” He stated with a rough smack to your butt then gripped it firmly. His other hand that was circling your clit slapped your wet pussy over and over again making your body ever closer to snapping.

As if on queue your body shivered and white hot pleasure enveloped your senses causing both of your holes to flutter and clench. The spanks to your clit making you squirt. You heard Hyunjin groaning behind you as he released, flooding your ass with his cum. Hyunjin hid his face in your neck to catch his breath before moving. Your body was still shaking with the aftershocks of your orgasm. Both of you are covered in sweat.

A few minutes pass and his cock softens enough to pull out without causing much fuss. Hyunjin looks at where you two were previously connected and takes in the mess you two have made. “I don’t think Versace is going to want these pants back,” he chuckled and you were mortified once you saw that your juices had not only soaked the bed but also the designer pants your boyfriend was half wearing. “Why didn’t you take him off?!” He shrugged, “not my fault I get hypnotized by my incredibly attractive muse.” You facepalmed as your blush gave away your utter embarrassment.

How were you two supposed to explain this? Oops sorry, we got kinda carried away this morning and got cum all over your super expensive designer clothes. Yeah, right.

During your inner turmoil you didn’t notice Hyunjin get out of bed. He was now standing in front of you with his hand outstretched.

“How ‘bout that shower now, hm?”

Taglist: @doitforbangchan @jehhskz

[corpseidol]

I saw you said requests are open and thought I’d send one! (Can I be 🦙anon?? If that isn’t taken by someone else!)

Imagine being Aiden’s sibling (and Ben’s cousin) and dating Tyler. Like just what that’d be like? And also had a thought like I could just see happening with being Aiden’s sibling and dating Tyler 💀.

But like Aiden always unintentionally stopping them from kissing?? Even just a simple kiss on the cheek because he keeps unintentionally interrupting/making it awkward every time. Even funnier if they have yet to have a first kiss and Aiden keeps unintentionally stopping it from happening without realizing?? 😭💀

SO FAR, SO CLOSE

author's note : you can be llama anon (i love ur brain)

concept : being aiden’s sibling AND tyler’s gf? genre : headcanons content : curse words, you’re involved with the phantom world stuff

⠀ › ⠀being aiden’s sibling meant handling annoying situations ⠀ › ⠀growing up, aiden was unintentionally your “patience trainer” ⠀ › ⠀unless you have the same personality as him (which would be way worse than the phantom world, you guys would be the cause of world destruction) ⠀ › ⠀dating tyler at the same time meant dealing with both their bullshit ⠀ › ⠀tyler does try to keep it cool, he doesn’t wanna bother you by shit talking your own brother ⠀ › ⠀tyler gets all “aiden was such a… rascal! he was being so!” he would pause to use the right words ⠀ › ⠀gets irritated when aiden interrupts your kisses to the point he literally accuses aiden of doing it on purpose ⠀ › ⠀”i swear you’re trying to start a fight!” tyler complained ⠀ › ⠀“what happened?” aiden scratched his cheek with a dumb smile ⠀ › ⠀tyler would sometimes blurt out cursewords at aiden “you dumb #### i will #### you! i swear to god!” ⠀ › ⠀at some point tyler would have actually yelled at aiden “i can’t even kiss my own girlfriend because of your lemon-headed ass always having to be everywhere!” ⠀ › ⠀like the twins, it was some unspoken rule to aiden that you wouldn't leave his sight unless you're just in your room chilling.

bonus:

⠀ › ⠀absolute chaos in the phantom world honestly. ⠀ › ⠀tyler would check on his sister and you first, obviously ⠀ › ⠀when tyler would save you from a phantom, he would heavily breathe and ask “you okay?” with his weapon up (blushing n kicking my feet) ⠀ › ⠀aiden would smile at this and kill the next phantom before tyler could and ask you “you okay?” before giggling ⠀ › ⠀tyler’s eye would literally be twitching and the others would have to remind them about the serious situation ⠀ › ⠀so many situations where they exchange “that’s my sibling!” and “that’s my girlfriend!” ⠀ › ⠀whenever you are going out on a date with tyler, aiden would come with you to “drop you off” ⠀ › ⠀you could feel the tension when aiden says goodbye with that eat-shitting grin on his face

[bones4thecats]

Which ror characters do you think would have this dynamic:

*reader being drunk as hell* *character trying to get her up to help her make it to bed* reader:"get the hell away from me i have a partner."

Character:...i AM your partner

Reader,smiling dumbly: "hi luv"

(if it's too bothersome feel free to skip)

A/N: OMG, this was so much fun to write for!! I love this dynamic in couples, my friend actually has this dynamic and I tease her for it all the time! This is the Gods edition, I’ll make a Humans one later. Anyways, enjoy~~

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💀 He may seem like he wants a regal and mature S/O, but let's be honest, he needs a chaotic one to balance him out

💀 So when you got drunk, holy hell, it was funnier than shit

💀 Hades came home and walked through the bedroom doors and saw as you laid on your back, allowing your top half to dangle off the edge and your bottom to hang on the bed top

💀 He chuckled and asked what you were doing in which you replied with;

“ Layin’ down. “

💀 You were slurring as you spoke, and with that, your body language, and the empty wine bottle that laid on the bedside table top led him to realize, you were drunk

💀 He bent his knees and began to lift you up before coaxing you into bed, and when he was about to lay beside you, you pushed him back up, and said;

“ Get the Helheim away from me, I have a husband. “

💀 Hades started to cry from holding back his laughter, answering with;

“ My Queen, I am your husband. “ “ Hi love. “

💀 He was not letting you gain access to his wine anytime soon

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💪 Like Hades, he seems like he wants a fairly mature S/O, but he does enjoy the amounts of randomness and seeming chaos you bring everywhere you turn

💪 He had been training with Ares’ army, since the God was busy with other work, and all he wanted was to lay down and take a well-deserved sleep with you by his side

💪 Heracles expected you to be sitting on the couch waiting for him, but seeing you sprawled out, snoring with an empty beer bottle on the ground, he chuckled, picked you up and laid you on the bed while he took a quick shower

💪 He knew you hated him laying in bed all sweaty and sticky

💪 When he finished his shower and got ready to lay down with you, you laid a hand on his chest while gently, yet firmly, pushing him away

“ Don’t come near me, I have a husband, and he would kick your butt for touching me. “

💪 He wanted to laugh so badly, and unlike Hades, he did, though he kept it at a low volume

“ Sweetheart, I am your husband. “ “ Hi love. “

💪 Seeing you smile made him chuckle, and lay down next to you as you relaxed

💪 He’s have to tell the others not to give you any alcohol anytime soon

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🌩️ He adores the chaos you bring around most of the time, but he doesn’t like it if it gets to be super extreme, so if Loki is involved, nope

🌩️ Thor and you seem to balance each other out well, he’s calm and quiet while you’re loud and oblivious

🌩️ He has seen your drunk before, but that time you just passed out after hugging him and making him carry you home from the meeting

🌩️ But he had never seen you this drunk

🌩️ Thor came home from his training and noticed a broken bottle on the ground with slight blood, and it made him ready himself, preparing to see something horrid

🌩️ He strode deeper inside your living room and saw you laying on the ground with a blanket lazily draped over your midsection, halfway off and halfway on

🌩️ Slight blood was dripping onto the ground and blanket from your hand, you must have dropped the bottle and tried cleaning it up

🌩️ Thor picked you up and laid you on the bed and motioned for the maids to clean the mess up while he took you to bed

🌩 Once he laid you down and tried to clean up your hard injury, you woke up and pushed him away from you with a pout

“ Get away from me… I have a husband, thank you. “ “ My bolt, I am your husband… ” “ Hi love… ”

🌩️ Sigh, this is why he doesn’t let Loki and you hang out

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📨 He didn’t keep that much alcohol inside the house, knowing you’d do something stupid with it

📨 The only stuff he kept was things like wines given to him on his birthdays and whatnot, but he made sure to keep it hidden very well from you

📨 When Hermes came home early that day, he had decided to break open a bottle of red wine with you, but when he went to go grab some, it was gone, and he froze

📨 Hearing stumbling come through the house made him grab a pair of scissors just in case and walk towards it, carefully not making much noise

📨 Hermes looked inside your room and saw you with a bottle in your hands, it was nearly fully empty, and by the way three more rested besides you, you were drunk off your ass

📨 He just chuckled at both your actions and his own

“ My dear, are you alright? “

📨 He grabbed the bottle and kneeled down to kiss your forehead before you stood up and caused him to headbutt you on accident, thankfully, you didn’t seem to feel it

“ I have a husband, and he can run circles around you, now, leave! “ “ Dear, I am your husband, but I thank you for the compliment. “ “ Hi love. “

📨 It took a while, but when he finally got you to sleep it was fun, especially when you woke up and remembered what you did, he was gonna use that against you for a while