#thats enough real feelings for one day *salute*

[eventually--darling]

first date 5 billion this weekend

[ryescapades]

can i request Narumi x reader but the reader is similar to Dazai(not really but i forgot who else that i could make an example of) ? Very silly and people underastimate them because of that but when the situation calls for it they're scary as hell.

Maybe Narumi underastimate them at first, and then he saw how scary they actually are but instead of going 100% scared he's like "thats kinda hot"

Maybe the reader is a captain/vice-captain of another division or a platoon leader. Also, make the personality EXTRA silly(the reader is doing it on purpose) like airhead, silly, and very naive (the reader is faking it and people actually fell for that act)

caprice | narumi gen

— three times narumi noticed you during the joint training session between the first and third divisions, slowly getting to know you from afar and the one time he inadvertently decided to fall for you (literally).

genre/warning: gn platoon leader dazai!reader, fluff, inaccurate use of scientific conditions and processes, idk if reader is silly enough here... i tried my best ok TT

a/n: uh another long fic haha thank you for the request!! dazai is actually one of my top kinnies but i'm not sure if this is even good, anon i'm rly sorry if it's not up to your standards 🥲 also here's the menace :3

3.4k wc hoshina | extra

the first time narumi gen met you, a member he'd assumed was from the third division, the only thing that was on his mind was what the fuck?

no, literally.

because what the fuck were you doing being hung upside down in the first division's gym room, discussing about god knows what with his platoon leaders?

"wait, wait, i think i'm finally feeling it!" you squealed, arms expanding to the side to distance the others from your hanging body. "whoa! is it working, is it working?" tachibana inquires excitedly beside an entertained-looking shinonome. "are you really sure this method is even legit?" the latter added, amusement clear in her eyes.

"what the hell are you guys doing?" narumi couldn't help himself from intervening the scene, for the sheer incredulity had taken over him before he even had the time to think it over. the three of you turned to face him in surprise.

his own subordinates straightened up to give him a salute, while it took you a few minutes before you did too. "ara, if it isn't captain narumi himself," you mused. narumi only raised an eyebrow, not shocked in the slightest that you knew him as he waited for a reply to his earlier question. at that, your expression enlightened.

"oh, right! your platoon leaders here were meditating earlier and tachibana-san almost dozed off... so i suggested a method to feel less sleepy. being hung like this makes you feel the blood rushes to your head, you know? it's such an exhilarating feeling for real," you claimed, resulting in the captain to gaze at you questioningly as your thumb and pointer fingers perched below your chin almost proudly.

narumi blinked, thinking about how... odd this person— you— was. is the third division only consisted of weirdos? must be some random low-class officer meeting those two on accident, he thought, shaking his head slightly in disbelief.

it was not long after that when the first division's captain saw you again, this time in the mess hall where you were sitting with some familiar faces from the third division, which only reinforced his theory that you were indeed from the third.

"reno, have you watched the new movie i talked about before?" furuhashi asked, swallowing his food before looking at his fellow officer. "oh, the one with that famous actor from russia? no, i haven't. isn't that movie adult-rated though?" the silver-haired prodigy asked.

"whaaat? why are you children watching movies about people who play hide the salami, huh!?" kafka scolded, causing furuhashi to counter back, "who the heck even says 'hide the salami' these days, old man?!" by then you just arrived with your tray of food, hearing only one-fourth of the sentence when you took a seat beside the older man.

"oohh, are we pranking someone?" you butt in eagerly, joining in the conversation. the other three snapped their heads towards you in confusion. "prank? who said anything about a prank?" reno asked, head tilting to the side.

you smiled, blinking owlishly at his question. "hide the salami? why are we hiding food if not for a prank...?" your eyes bounced between the three men who were sharing awkward glances with each other.

narumi, who had been eavesdropping the whole time, nearly grimaced. so you're odd and... kind of an airhead, in a way. his brain concluded, simply observing when you abruptly pointed your finger at something far to the right, "captain ashiro, look! there's a cute cat over there!!" when ashiro snapped her head so fast, she realized a bit too late to catch your sneaky hand stealing a piece of food from her tray.

"hey, eat your own food!" kafka reprimanded as you happily nibbled on the stolen treasure but ashiro only waved it off, muttering about how she's gotten used to your antics by now, secretly fond of how your delighted expression itself comically resembled a feline creature.

"what are you staring at, baka shisho?" kikoru's jeer interrupted narumi's daze, causing his back to tense. "nothing. can't you go a day without being an annoying pest?" he sneers, which the girl only laughed mockingly at, though surprisingly she didn't notice that the captain was still snooping in to hear the conversation at your table, listening to the many obnoxious and bizarre (yet interestingly smart, he'd begrudgingly admit) ways you'd recommended to prank someone.

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

the third time narumi saw you, it was during a joint sparring session between his and the third division. he was initially supposed to be overseeing kikoru and her new numbers weapon suit but the commotion at the central area of the training venue had snatched his, and the other officers' interest instead.

it was you, preparing to spar with hoshina, his nemesis. in hand-to-hand combat, no less. not to add the two of you were going to use real swords, not the dummy ones.

"are they serious? why would they match up against hoshina?" "i know right... they're gonna lose for sure," "yikes, i'm sending early condolences to them right now,"

narumi had to agree with what he heard his division members were whispering about. sure, he sometimes thinks hoshina's skill level is below his own, but to spar with a regular officer? the swordsman is gonna pummel you straight to the ground, no doubt!

however, his chain of thought was eventually cut off when he later noticed that you were holding on your own, superbly at that. with every hit of hoshina's blade, you'd parried with your own and every small opening hoshina had unknowingly exposed, you had taken the advantage by striking just as hard.

the rapid sounds of metal clanging against each other were loud, echoing even. it was plainly and clearly visible to him that you're not just an officer.

narumi called for his disciple, "oi. who's that training with your vice-captain?" he asked, head nodding towards where you and hoshina were still exchanging blows. kikoru glanced at the direction he mentioned before she grinned wide and cheshire-like.

"oh, them. that's one of our newly appointed platoon leaders, y/n-san! such a spectacle to behold, i know! they're from the third, after all!" she boasted. a platoon leader? y/n, huh... narumi could finally put a name to that pretty face.

wait, what? who the hell said that?

the bicolor-haired man shook his head a bit before focusing back at the fight. "what are you gloating for, dumbass. it's not like—" his sentence died midway when suddenly a particular hard swing from hoshina had struck you straight in the face, causing you to stagger backward as your block was seen a little too late to cover the blow.

the atmosphere suddenly became silent and still, narumi's eyes widening in surprise at the same time as hoshina's in guilt when everyone noticed the few drops of blood through your fingers. "shit, sorry! i didn't mean to hit ya that hard! you okay there?"

narumi instinctively took a step towards your direction when your figure started swaying, his eyes unconsciously glaring at the violet-haired man as the latter reached out his palm so that you could show him the bruise but when you gave no reply, eyes downcast and body rigid, hoshina cursed under his breath. "fuck, y/n. i'm so sorry—"

"boo!"

the unexpected sight of your mischievous, uninjured face and only a faintly sliced skin on your palm greeted the crowd. an annoyed mark appeared at the side of hoshina's head. "you cheeky lil' brat! ya had me so worried there!" he scolded, his hands pulling on your cheeks so hard your eyes watered as you whined, "but it was hilarious watching you— ow, ow, vice-captain! that hurts!"

the others seemed to relax, and a few hushed murmurs entered narumi's ears.

"the heck? what a fluke." "right? there's no way they held off for that long. the vice-captain must have gone easy on them."

on the sidelines, narumi's mouth gaped open and then closed like a fish. was that actually a fluke, or are you actually...? he was slightly bewildered, not knowing whether to acknowledge the fact that you are, in fact, such a whimsical and unserious person he almost found it quite endearing (he didn’t bother acknowledging that thought), or that it was unnoticeable by almost everyone else, but he could see the scratches on hoshina's hands and face, the nicks his RT-0001 eyes had detected were done by your sword.

they were indistinct, hardly noticeable, and barely bleeding that it just proved how careful you were in handling your blade. what's more jarring, however, was that his kaiju eyes couldn't miss the deadly and almost murderous look in your eyes when you were exchanging blows with hoshina earlier.

narumi couldn't help but to smirk menacingly as he ran a hand through his locks, feeling enraptured by the sudden realization.

so it's not just hoshina he has to beat. there's you now.

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

it was another random tuesday night when the emergency kaiju alarm blared, signalling the entire headquarter of the incoming kaiju attack. in the meeting room together with the captains and other platoon leaders from the third and first divisions, you were briefly discussing strategies and plans for the neutralization process.

"so it's settled, then. two platoon leaders from each division in one sector. make sure to remember where your group is assigned and keep track of any yoju going in and out of your sector before alerting the other platoons of it. this one might get messy," ashiro summarised before everyone briskly moved out, preparing to head to the kaiju location.

narumi, who had been halfheartedly listening to the whole briefing in boredom, pushed away from the wall he was leaning against and headed towards the door, before noticing a lone figure standing by the desk in the middle of the room.

you were staring hard at the splayed out map in front you, hands shoved in your pockets and head tilted to the side in what narumi assumed to be deliberation. what else is there to think about when ashiro already summed up everything? the man thought before he shrugged, leaving you alone in the meeting room.

the mission was supposed to be simple. tedious, sure, but easy enough for the two divisions to handle. take down the honju, then finish off the remaining clusters of its accompanying yoju— it was said they'd go berserk when triggered by the death of the mother— that were scattered throughout the district.

well, until it's not so easy anymore.

once ashiro had shot down the honju using the explosive power of her cannon, all the yoju had indeed, gone ballistic. the battlefield was messy with all the kaiju corpses and rubbles from destroyed buildings.

appointed as one of the main firepower on land, narumi's earpiece dinged, and the voice of one of the operations officer filled his ears. "captain narumi! sector d requested for backup just a few minutes ago but we've recently lost contact with them!"

confusion took over the captain's expression. backup? these lots of yoju barely have a 4.0 fortitude, did a new high-leveled kaiju appear? oh well, another material to be used in increasing my kill count and popularity if that's the case. his mind pondered as he stepped off the dead body of the kaiju he'd just taken down, his bayonet slung over a shoulder.

"aite, on it," straight away on the move, he considered the possibilities of a bigger threat popping up, like another one of no 9's creation, for instance. narumi's expression darkened at the thought.

however, when he arrived at the site, there was no commotion at all. it was rather quiet. he would've thought that no battle had happened here, if not for the concrete debris and kaiju remains laying around. he decided to look around and survey the area, just in case the information he received was just a small miscalculation.

it was not until he realized he had walked for too long that he froze. sector d wasn't supposed to cover this much space, so why were there so many corpses outside of the neutralization area? narumi tried connecting his earpiece, only for it to let out a series of crackles. this is where they lost connection, huh? he thought.

a sudden movement to his left had him going stiff before he swiftly and sharply spun, bayonet ready in his hand. irritation took over his expression when he saw that it's just an officer. "hey, i almost took your head! be more mindful next time, will you?" he chastised, causing the officer to bow profusely, cowering away from his large weapon. "i apologise, captain narumi! i was just wondering what are you doing here... the neutralization is already finished in this part of the sector."

"haah?? operations said you guys needed backup. what's up with that?" he complained, glaring at the officer who he assumed was from the third division since he wasn't a familar face to narumi at all. "oh, that's already been dealt with! platoon leader y/n had it all planned out!" narumi halted at that, now intrigued so he told the officer to fill him in on what happened prior to the mission.

---

"psst, you two! come here for a sec," the men in question, toma and ryu turned when they had heard you calling for them a few feet away from the mixed group of first and third divisions soldiers in sector d. "yes! what is it, platoon leader?"

"mind helping me out for a bit?" as they immediately nodded their heads, you straight promptly explained what you wanted them to do. "so we just need to be on the lookout with you at the communication towers outside the sector?"

"ding, ding! that's correct! if you see a kaiju coming your way, just lure it back to your original post where everybody else is. i'll be staying back to tweak out some electricals at the radio masts." you stated.

with the yoju having a bat-like behavior, you'd theorized that they would use ultrasonic echolocation to create a radio wave disturbance that could badly affect the earpieces you're using. despite how low the kaiju's fortitude is, it's immense intellect make up for most of that small number.

that's why the yoju would've probably target the region with the densest wave energy, which is the telecommunication towers. with its echolocation and your communication devices pulsing simultaneously, they would interfere with each other and cause an overlap of frequencies. hence, communication lost between officers would highly likely happen.

"that's fine and all, but y/n-san... if the kaiju really is how you speculate it, what if there's a lot of them coming at once?" toma asked worriedly. "you'll die, of course." you simply answered, making the officers screech in horror, "WHAT??!!"

letting out a chuckle, you waved a hand in dismissal. "don't worry. if there are many of them appearing, just leave them be and return to your post,"

toma and ryu exchanged a look. "but then we'd be leaving you alone, y/n-san!" the latter wailed. at that, you hummed thoughtfully, "hm... i'll be the one dying then," you said matter of factly.

"Y/N-SAN!!!"

"how about we do rock-paper-scissors to decide who's fixing the comms?"

"this is not the time to joke around, platoon leader!"

you belted out a laugh at their unified shriek of despair. "it's fine, it's fine! put a little trust on me, yeah? if there's nothing else, i'll head on first. i'll be counting on you guys!"

---

"turned out the kaiju that emerged really did behave exactly like how platoon leader y/n had expected. i kind of felt bad for the first division officers that were assigned together with us because they weren't informed about the plan," toma, narumi had learned of his name, said.

narumi stood there, a tinge of amazement sitting in the far back of his mind at the thought of how meticulous you had been in planning your own strategies. although he was a bit annoyed that you didn't bother telling your fellow platoon leader or superiors— ashiro, hoshina, or him, even— about it. your officers were right; you could've died.

toma was about to add more when your sheepish voice in his earpiece caught his attention. "nee, nee, toma. are you free right now? or anybody, really. i've fixed the signals since it got altered again but uh, i kind of need some help with all these yoju around me," you said, not in the slightest worried about how dangerous the situation you were in right now.

in fact, you sounded like you were casually talking about fixing a broken lamp instead of trying to adjust the freaking junction boxes while being surrounded by a bunch of kaiju.

narumi zeroed in when toma cried out your name. "what? you said you already neutralized all of them, y/n-san! what do you mean there's more?!"

the first division captain immediately snatched the earpiece, completely unapologetic in his action. "your location, platoon leader?" he ordered. "i'm still at the comms towers— oya? is this captain narumi i hear?" he didn't bother answering before he was already running (not before tossing the earpiece back to its owner), leaving behind a flabbergasted toma.

when narumi eventually stepped past the metal fences enclosing the area where you were at, the rosiness of his irises detected not just the piles of dead monsters but also a horde of still-alive kaiju swarming around a radio mast. his eyes twitched, visibly annoyed now that he knew why his earpiece had been giving out static noises one too many times ever since he entered sector d.

he made a quick work of taking them down, slicing away and shooting at every kaiju that came his way. at one point, he heard a faint sound behind him. narumi was about to turn and finish off the kaiju that was ambushing him, but then there was a slight change in the air. it was heavy, and it was approaching fast.

suddenly, a figure dropped from above, plunging the kaiju straight in the core so swiftly narumi almost thought he saw a lightning strike right in front of his very eyes. with a power so dense it almost rivaled his own, the man could only stare as blood sprayed out from the dead monster, raining down on both him and you.

sweet lord, it was you.

with your personal weapon in hand, standing so gracefully on top of the corpse it had his breath stuttering in his chest.

fuck, that was so hot, narumi unconsciously thought.

you, with blood smeared everywhere on your face and suit, finally connected your eyes with his. "oh, captain narumi! i didn't think you'd actually come here," you exclaim. when he gave no reply, your eyebrows raised in curiosity. "did you get injured, captain? why are you on the ground?"

it was only then that he noticed that he was down on his knees (narumi? the narumi gen?? kneeling???), his own weapon laid at his side, neglected. what the hell? he refused to admit how powerful and magnificent you were that it had him forgetting about your little naivety, that it had him weak in the knees.

he shook himself out of his embarrassing stupor before quickly standing back up. "good... i'm good," narumi internally cursed at himself when he realized his voice quivered midway.

"anyway, what in the world was that?! your officer said you didn't inform my platoon of your little plan here!" he fussed.

"ah, that! it was a gamble actually. i didn't want to risk the lives of those who haven't worked with me enough to understand how i operate in this line of work. my subordinates knew what they were in here for," you explained, nonchalantly wiping away the red liquid from your face.

a gamble on your life, basically. narumi frowned at that. he was about to comment more when you turned away, though your face was still directed at him. "well, in any case, i think i should be thanking you, captain." you sent him a cheeky grin.

"huh, what for?"

"you said i was hot earlier. thanks!" with that, you dashed away to handle the remaining kaiju, leaving behind a flustered and rigid narumi gen as he watched you go on a killing spree.

in spite of your beauty and grace, in his eyes, you ain't no angel, no. you're a goddamn valkyrie, an ethereal being dancing with death in the middle of a bloody battlefield. and he— his heart, is a mere soldier ready and willing to be lead by you to the gates of heaven, he realised.

jp phrases used >> おや (oya), ねぇ ねぇ (nee nee)

©🅁🅈🄴🅂🄲🄰🄿🄰🄳🄴🅂. do not steal, translate or repost my work anywhere else !

[everynya]

when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers or moots (positivity is cool) 💖

HELLO NAT!!!! WAVES MY ARMS AROUND

SALUTATIONS ARSENE!! i’m so sorry i took forever to get to this i was in a very bad headspace, but ty for the ask! no one expect too much from me post wise these days i just felt bad i hadn’t answered this yet (imagine u are my 10 favorite followers and i send this to u 10 times cause ngl…i’m just gonna let whoever wants to do it do it, so oomfies if u see this u get my pass to do this cause i cannot have faves!)

hello and welcome to nat’s current top 5 radio hits. i shall share and explain each one like a maniac (i yoinked my top songs i heard these past weeks from my airbuds app)

⭐️ CamGirl >.<!!! - Villiano Antillano

⭐️ Oh Qué Sera? - Willie Colon

⭐️ In The End - Drake Bell

⭐️ Mr. Bass - A.C.E.

⭐️ Run Away To Mars - Khoi Dao, Geoff Bisentte

5. to start off, even if you dont know spanish i recommend her so much…Villiano is a puertorrican trans woman who has been revolutionizing rap for women and does so especially in her album this song is from called Miss Misogyny, let me say THE SONG IS GOODDDD its about sex work and the control and empowerment and the lack of shame and taboo around these things, its one of her many songs in the album that in an interview she says was made for female rappers to claim rap as their own by writing her own songs that dont put women down and are about the control they should have in their music…ive been listening to Villiano since one of the collab songs she did with a popular dj that blew her up years ago and ive enjoyed what shes done. its a trap song so maybe not everyones cup of tea but yeah

4. this song is really good, spanish song of the week i loop. thank fuck it wasnt a reggaeton song. but this song is by a puertorrican (though the song was originally by a brazilian artist, willie reinterpreted the song after a trip to brazil he had) thats generally about believing in things and finding in a sense a love for the unknown, its a really good song that uses a lot of metaphors

3. I can’t share why for this one, sorry, but anyway it’s a good song!

2. this one isnt in my airbuds top songs this week at all. but. anyway. ace. MR BASS NE MAMEUL ULLINEUN RIDEUM MR BASS DALKOMHAN NAUI SOKSAGIME JUNGDOKDOEGO MAL GEOL MR BAS CANNN YOUUU FEEEEL NE IPSURUI TTEOLLIM MR BASS AAAHH MR BASS AHHH

1. OKAY. OKAY. run away to mars but covered by khoi dao (voice actor) makes me all kinds of levels of crazy and every few days i loop it. first of all, this specific va is the voice claim for my oc f/o actually! khoi is such a great guy and ive always adored his voice and i cannot ever unhear the idea of the stupid idiot i made in my head sounding like him. its a very classic ���liking a song cause you imagine your f/o singing it’ AND ITS SO ON BRAND FOR HIM ANNNDDD MY SHIP. the song fits him and my insert stupidly well

the song underneath has very sad undertones, i feel i can rlly relate to it rn but ill talk abt it more on my ship. its really befitting of these two (esp emi aka the f/o) given the fact that the song not only has the kind of energy where if you dont listen deep enough you can miss its meaning and just enjoy its energy which is very on brand for him but also its so heavily focused on escapism and insecurity in a way where it KILLS ME. the part of ‘three two one i miss you, im sorry i got issues’ makes me sick cause he would truly apologize over the mere fact of having emotions because he tucks them so far away he doesnt believe theyre even real or his (in a way, hes the one who ‘runs away to mars’)…his escapism in a sense is nayla, in the idea that he becomes focused on her faded colors or more so her issues and so he loses what is home and ‘how long till im discovered’ by not just anyone else but himself, he doesnt find on his own that hes having a hard time with himself.

none of this made sense and theres way more to it, but the amount of times ive been unable to not associate these two w this song…. like sorry that my current obsession rn is a ship of two characters i made and makes no sense to anyone but me

[straycalamities]

no for real the onceler fandom when i was a huge part of it (2015/2016) was so fuckin toxic half the people left bc everyone was praising one or two blogs and acting like everyone else was dirt. it was super discouraging and i ran about 3 blogs and the only interactions i ever got was from people starting drama :(

im not sure what the askblog scene looks like today but im HOPING and PRAYING its better

eughh im sorry that sounds like absolute hell...i barely dipped my toes in because i was recovering from Stuff (stuff that took me to this year to get over enough to even make another personal blog) so i wasnt Too up-to-date with what was going on in the fandom from 2015 tooo 2019?ish? even if i popped in on entre's blog time to time, but i've heard stuff from others and friends

i think the askblog scene is A LOT more chill these days. a lot more lax and there's sooo much just...Less of everything that it makes things easier to like take in stride at least to me compared to 2012-2014 days where everything was so intense, extreme, and constant

there's still the like ghosts of the same issues that've been present since day one but its like...on a MUCH lesser scale. i honestly think it's pretty good all things considered :) the only thing that makes it rly hard for me compared to past eras is how split the fandom is uhhh app/site-wise (like its very much spread across tiktok, tumblr, twitter, discord, maybe more...idk) and so it feels like im missing out if i dont keep up everywhere LMAO and each location comes with its own issues either population-wise or site/app-wise

i miss how centralized it used to be to tumblr u_u and obviously having more content to look at back in the day, i got very spoiled on it so when i peruse the fandom content its like a lot less to look at but thats honestly GOOD FOR ME BC I HAVE NO TIME NOW LMAOOOO but its just like strange bc im like woah i dont have to scroll for an hour on entres dash anymore to catch up

well i do, but that's bc i have no time to check it on work days and so it piles up for when i do sit and take the time. cant imagine the hell i'd be in if it was 2012-era activity

ppl who had full-time jobs in the fandom in 2012 damn...i salute you.

unfortunately with a fandom as niche as this, it kinda cooks up the same issues over and over again and it makes me wish there was some sort of disclaimer that popped up as soon as you wanted to join the fandom to give you a rundown on how the culture is, who the people are, what the past drama was (so dont bring it up again), and all that LMFAO like a onceler fandom 101 that was just beamed into your device when you were like hmm what if i joined the onceler fandom LMAO

i kinda wanna do something like that specifically for askblogs? like a dos and donts. or "things i wish i knew when i started an askblog" type of thing but alas..no time. bc i see other mods go through the same obstacles/difficulties i went through and learned to either change my thinking on, or something else to either help me get past it/over it or at least cope better and id wanna pass that on if the fandoms gonna keep getting revived every two or so years and then cave in on itself from the same rehashed drama/problems it always has :sob emoji:

[lgcbk]

⸻ A REWRITE. ( Spring Boys Reflection )

'...You're early - '

Two taps at the dance studio's doorframe signals the trainee's arrival. Byeongkwan greets the coach with a two-finger salute, dropping his duffel bag off by the speakers. at the front of the room. He waits for the coach's usual greeting, something along the lines of a reprimand or an order of some sort of body weight exercise. But it never comes, instead the coach glances at his watch and back at the trainee with a blink. 'You're really early.'

"Yeah..." Byeongkwan mutters, giving a dismissive shrug. "You didn't have anyone on the schedule today so I figured we could get a head start on things. If you don't have anything planned for our lesson, I have some recordings from dress rehearsals and I wanted to get some..." he trails off, finally peering up at the older male from behind the cover of his hoodie. "...What?"

Slack-jawed and wide-eyed, the coach staggers backward dramatically, jutting out an arm to brace himself against the floor-length mirrors. 'Who are you and what have you done with Byeongkwan?' The trainee snorts. "Wow, you're so funny. Can we just get started? I really want to get back."

'So, I take it you're enjoying yourself?'

"I guess," he shrugs again, resisting the urge to grin as he drops down into a lunge to warm up. "Beats spending every other day in here with you, that's for sure." The dance coach saunters over, giving Byeongkwan's shoulder enough of a nudge to throw him off balance and onto his side. 'Work on your core' he snorts, shuffling over to the sound system. 'You must be sad it's almost over, though?'

"A little. It just feels... Bittersweet, yeah," he shrugs, jutting out his bottom lip a bit. "I'm glad everything's slowing down. The past few weeks just went by so quickly, it's like a blur almost..."

"You know," he starts, abandoning his stretches to take a seat in the middle of the floor. "I really didn't think I'd make it this far. To do something like this. I remember hopping from gig to gig for so long before I signed. I kind of felt like this was just another one of those... I don't know, I guess Spring Boys finally made things feel... real? Like I'm going somewhere, not just waiting for the other shoe to drop."

"I felt it a lot while we were filming too. I know we were mostly just goofing off and playing games but.. Thinking about people tuning in to watch and see us perform. It made me want to put on a really good show."

"And the live performances... The energy? I think thats what I'm going to remember the most. That rush... Made all those practices worth it. I liked being able to work with the other guys too. I'm not good with... I don't know, handling my stress sometimes. And having others to lean on and snap me out of my own deal... I think I really needed that. And I'm appreciative for all the help I got, whether it be with choreography and holding up on stage or just keeping my head on straight. I always thought it before, but now I'm sure that being on a good team is a make or break for me."

"I really liked the fresh concepts we had too... But after seeing the other performances I don't know if they were really me," he ponders with a click of his tongue. "Now that everyone knows what a heartthrob I am, I should try to show something different, huh? A cool vibe, you know. Something badass - " The coach purses his lips at the trainee's choice of language, but gives an amused nod. "I'm just saying... Outsider's stage was pretty cool, I could see myself in something like that. Or doing something rap focused... I've been writing more lyrics lately, I'd like to show them off one day..."

"Alright, I think I'm all sentimental'd out... Can we just practice now? I hate hearing myself talk this much - "

'You do? Since when?!'

"Since today," he snorts again, heading over to set up the track on the dance studio speakers.

[chattahoochiecoochie]

Rick Flag Is A Softie

Summary: Rick flag reminds Harley just how much he loves her, because who cares if he’s a little soft for a girl like her. 

Word Count: 650

Notes: Not exactly the request I got from @sheena-is-a-punk-rocker​ as she wanted something from Harley’s POV, but still soft and cute. If you like this, you can find the rest of my Rick Flag “Blank” series here. 

He wasn’t going to say anything. He knew better than that. Hell, everyone here knew better than that. Harley Quinn didn’t need reminding or scolding or coddling. And at first, when he watches her climb into the cargo plane, he decides against saying anything at all. But then, when she takes her seat and starts messing with her hair he realizes he has to tell her. He has to tell her so that if something happens next time he will have said it and she will have known he cared enough to let it out.

“Hey darlin’.” He slides into the seat next to hers, cornering them at the back of the plane. She’s gonna scold him for being soft, at least he can shield himself from the embarrassment of being heard by everyone else.

“Hiya doll,” She’s grinning, oblivious to the blood thats crusted from her nose to her top lip, bleeding into her smile. “Didja see me with that last guy? Real sucka for pain, just kept coming back for more.”

Yes. Of course he’d seen it. As if he could look anywhere else. She was all there was, ever. He watched her in awe, and then almost always with worry. She’d handled that last guy just fine, swinging and swinging until she’d bashed his face in, but what if she hadn’t? What if she’d missed?

“I saw. I liked the other one better, the one you choked out?” He smiles at her, trying to conceal the panic growing in his stomach. Its soothed by his lie, because its not a lie, not really. She’d clambered up a wall and come down onto a mans shoulders, wrenching her arms through a gate for leverage, and then, just to prove a point to the man in her grasp, she choked him to death with her thighs, grinning as she grit her teeth, because Harley Quinn can stick it to the man any day of the week.

“Yeah, betcha got all hot watchin’ me, isn’t that right doll.”

“Watch it Quinn.” He’s blushing, she’s right as always.

“I know, I know, only in private, mister Flag likes his secrets.”

“Harley.” He’s serious now.

“Flag.” She pouts, furrowing her brow as she looks up at him, her arms crossed tightly across a blood soaked t-shirt.

“You coulda been hurt today, you know that don’t you?”

“It’s the Suicide Squad.”

“I know, I just—”

“You ain’t gettin soft on me now are ya?”

“Just promise me that you’re being careful.”

“Pinky promise.” She gives him a little salute before offering him her pinky finger. He takes it in his own, pulling her by the hand so she’s closer to his chest.

“I love you Quinn.” She knows, she’s know since the beginning. “And I’ll kill you if you die out there.” He presses a kiss to the crown of her head, resting for a moment, taking in the smell he’s missed.

“Cool it, lovebirds!” Dubois yells from the other end of the plane and before Rick can chuckle or offer a retort, Harley’s got it covered. She’s pulled free from Rick’s grasp, but now has him in one of her own, her fists wrapped around his tac vest, forcing them to sit face to face.

“Jealous?” She leans to the side, taunting Dubois, before pressing a kiss to Ricks lips, the blood from her split lip slipping onto his tongue as she grins into him. It’s bitter, and he wishes he could taste her instead, but nothing beats the feeling. The feeling of the powerhouse in front of him, of the woman he doesn’t deserve, kissing him. Licking him and nipping at his bottom lip just to prove she’s all that and more, more than he can handle most of the time. Reminding him that even though she’s too much, she’s his, because every day she wakes up and wants to be.

If you want to send me a request, feel free! I don’t always interpret them exactly as written and I don’t write x reader, but I’ll do my best. Even if it takes me forever (sorry Sheena, this took me so long and I'm so sorry). 

[perriwinklesblog]

I know some people prefer consistent content but I like to take it as it comes and sometimes life happens and other projects need to take priority. 

So right now, I consider this to be a mid season break. Techno going into the prison was like the midseason finale for the Dream Prison Arc and Wilbur and Ranboo’s stuff was like their midseason finale and the Red Banquet where the egg was contained, was a midseason finale and alllllllll the mini episodes we’ve had since there are like specials etc. 

You know, like how in Dr Who you can go a few years without a solid season but get a special at Christmas and New Year? You know like that. 

So like all other programs, stories, videos I watch, I am coming up with ways in which the next bit could go. Some are a bit out there and definitely not happening, others I could see happening. 

This is long and pointless and full or errors both grammatically and spelling wise but I had fun thinking of what could happen next. Read if you want.

Dream escapes prison with Technoblades help. A server wide man hunt comes for Dream but unlike his videos he had stolen the spare armour in the prison and so is pretty OP making it easier for him to put distance between his enemies and himself. 

Technoblade returns to the artic and him, Phil and Will come to an in pass, a slight disagreement. Philza whilst having sided with Dream before, knows he’s not a good guy. Only used him to help destroy lmanburg for his own morals. It was not because he agreed with Dream. In his eyes, he was using Dream for his own goals. Plus, now he’s seen the aftermath of Dream’s terror on the citizens he realises the man perhaps shouldn’t be set to run entirely free. This slightly goes against Techno’s beliefs but the main issue of tension between them is Technoblade willingly placing himself in danger when he didn’t need too and helping release the man who tortured Tommy and clearly has something going on with Ranboo thats bad. 

Wilbur is angry because Techno won’t say where Dream has gone due to an agreement between the two and Technoblade is a man of his word. Wilbur wishes to thank and meet the man who saved him. This also worries Philza because he’s worried he’ll revert back to the man he saw the day he blew up L’Manburg. Over all tension between the three

Niki and Wilbur finally meet and it is as heartbreaking as it is beautifully tragic. Wilbur apologises but misses the mark, misses what hurt her which hurts her more. There’s an explosion with their argument that leaves a stunned silence. Niki asks Wilbur to leave. He does so. 

This leads to a Wilbur and Ranboo conversation where Ranboo tries to reason with Wilbur about Niki’s side. Wilbur brushes it off because much like the blue counterpart we all miss, he’s not a fan of the negative emotion. He tries to focus on the business etc and let’s slip that Dream has escaped somehow. Ranboo leaves. Wilbur is confused but distracted by a confrontation with Quackity.

Ranboo then starts his stream and he’s in the fucking panic room and he’s panicking because there are signs so many signs and they don’t make sense. Theres lesson rules, asking about the missing journal and it’s like every issue he’s ever faced is staring right back at him because Ranboo has never really resolved any issue, just pushed and moved on. He’s tried but that usually failed and for a while he’s ignored all the issues and here they are in front of him, all at one. A big volcanic eruption of anxiety and stress, and it ain’t sitting with him. 

Dream appears. But is it really him? We never know because after a conflict and a back and fourth about everyone in Ranboo’s life eventually landing on a threat about Michael and Tubbo, he blacks out and the stream ends. 

Quackity is livid with everything thats happening, the careful empire he’s building is falling apart and he’s shifting the blame around from person to person. He manipulates everyone around them into believing this is somehow their own fault and that they must make it up to him because he has been nothing but kind and loving to them. He gave them a place, a roof on their head when they had nothing. He misses out the parts where he insulted and or destroyed their homes, but it works and his employee “family” become the main bounty hunters for Dream, with Bad and Ant tagging along since they’re guards. 

Now the streams relating to the manhunt displays everyones wants. They’re all doing this wanting something, and whilst it’s to gain Quackity’s favour back they’re all doing that for different reasons. Their motivations are somewhat different even if on the surface they are the same and so on the man hunts, because there will be many, this is slowly picked apart and through that the manipulation of Quackity is revealed and then we see a parrallel between Quackity and previous people in power where they start to get desperate to keep control over the thing they’ve created. Because that’s been one of (not the only) issues with every leader on the server, the control and their feeling of lack of, even if thats not truly the case. But you get these moments between all the characters where they’re trying to outwit one another, trying to figure it out without blatantly saying it. Maybe Foolish does. He’s a bit of a himbo. 

Ponk always said he’d leave the door open for Sam and I truly think something happens, whether it be a look in the mirror with one of his guards going too far with someone or a conversation with Quackity where Quackity holds the mirror up to Sam maliciously, that causes him to hit the rock bottom and just break and I want that breakdown in front of Ponk. And I want Ponk not necessarily to give him the second chance off the bat but give him that peace offering, give him that hand to pull him up. I want him to take Sam to Niki and explain to Niki we’ve done bad things in the past, this is a safe haven and I believe Sam needs help and a place he can truly feel safe and for a moment Sam does and this begins his raid to redemption in gaining back the trust of the people in his lives. He becomes Tubbo 2.0 spying on Quackity like Tubbo did for Wilbur, but maybe less... bad.

But what of the Fiances? Wellllll,. With Dream escaping him and George meet in secret. George confesses he doesn’t believe it’s real and for a long time has been struggling with reality. He misses the early days, misses when they’d just have fun. Dream says he was having fun and George says I wasn’t. Dream shows true regret for George but says its too late now, can’t change the past. George agrees. Dream asks him what he’s going to do and he simply replies with “Sleep” Ending stream. 

Sapanps stream is a lot more WE ARE GOING ON A DREAM HUNT WE’RE GOING TO CATCH A BIG ONE, I’M NOT SCARED. vibes. He’s gearing up, he’s suiting up and he’s saluting pets on the way. He made a promise and with everything else going on in his life, he’s ready to throw himself into a distraction. He tries to convince George to help him but he waves him off saying, what’s the point? and mumbles something about divine powers and dreams which Sapnap just shakes off. He tries to find Karl in Kinoko but instead comes across Quackity. They have a blow up about how They abandoned each other, both did wrong but neither see the other side of things and eventually he tells him to leave. Quackity says okay, and the place blows up. Foolish cries in the corner. All that heard work but the boss said so. Sapnap ends the whole thing saying at least he’s there for Karl and Quackity pauses and is like why? And Sapnap is all like you care. Just go, you’ve done enough damage, I can’t have you damaging him too. And after a little more but but but between the two, Quackity goes. Sapnap leaves the place to burn, going to find Dream and hopefully Karl on the way. 

Karls in space. That’s where his latest travels have taken him and where the other side decided was his time to visit. Here I see a Wizard in Oz scenario where solutions to some issues will be revealed for Karl in relation to the other side. When it comes to his Dream SMP stuff, he starts confusing names and people more and Sapnap is worried about him, considering keeping him in a safe place. The only place that survived was the library with Karls books. Karl says he’ll stay there. Thats where the answers are anyway. Sapnap is unsure and gets bad vibes but is distracted by a lead on Dream and agrees, he tells him he’ll be back soon. 

They don’t see each other for a long ass time 

I’m not sure on the egg stuff but I do feel Niki and Puffy should have a conversation about all the shit thats happened and Puffy trying to help Niki and vice versa. I feel like Puffy should reach out to Foolish and try and comprehend what the fuck is he doing with Quackity. They have a little argument but it comes to a point where Puffy realises she cannot shield Foolish from harm and that her son ,just make his own decisions. All she can do is guide him where she can and hope that when it comes down to it he will make the right choice. She hopes she didn’t fail this dependant like she did with Dream her duckling. Though only she sees it as failure. 

Jack and Niki finally talk. She goes searching for some things and comes to his new place, he tells her to fuck off and that he doesn’t need anyone. They all abandon him. Niki pretty much does the verbal equivalent of slap some sense into him as she and him discuss how he is not the centre of everything, how he is not the sun. She was hurting, and he didn’t bother, no instead they just fed off each others anger and once he couldn’t feed of her or anyone else he isolated himself. She tries to convince him there are better things in life, there are better ways to place your energy etc. A lot of healing talk with Jack being stubborn. Eventually Jack finds himself at the door of Quackity after sticking to stubbornness, not quite ready to heal and he becomes the next member of Las Nevadas. A big blow to Wilbur too. 

They finally destroy the egg with magic. I dunno how but either destroy or hatch. Either or would be great. Red comes out the thing and I want a gay ass villain please. Bring it Red. Let’s go. Invite him to the server, bring the fire, bring the plant power Red. He can be the villain that unites everyone in a begrudging way. Like they all hate each other but fine i guess we’ll team to stop Red and Ant. 

Skeppy’s dead. 

Tubbo and Ranboo have a fight but Ranboo says “Weren’t we enough?” and it’s in relation to him and Michael (this happens before panic room). Thats when Tubbo realises where the wires got crossed and he immediately rectifies it but explaining he’s happy with the two of them but he wanted a job, something to work towards. Family wise he’s got it all, he’s content with it all but he wanted a project and one that didn’t incite violence. Fun rivalry sure, but he’s done with violence, he’s doesn’t want to add to the nightmares he already has. He wants competition but not one that will put all he loves in danger. So they talk it out and Ranboo feels more confident and Tubbo asks him to tell him if he ever takes anything too far because he can get a little carried away sometimes. Ranboo agrees and then they have a cute playdate with Michael. Then Ranboo does the thing with Wilbur and ends up in panic room.

Tommy and Tubbo discuss everything and lay it all out on the table because Tommy doesn’t want to be on the other side again with Tubbo. Tubbo doesn’t understand why everyone is making such a big deal about his burger business and Tommy tries to explain the issues with Quackity and the level of intensity he’s seen with Wilbur but Tubbo just laughs it off. They eventually talk about Ranboo and Tommy relents saying he likes Ranboo although he does sometimes get jealous of how Tubbo seems to have it all. Tubbo tells Tommy of his nightmares and so does Tommy to Tubbo. They come to an understanding with each other and understand that no matter how long they go apart, there is always a space shaped to fit them perfectly in their lives for them. Tubbo and Tommy then go play some pranks. 

Wilbur is unhappy with the pranks and gives a lecture and they get into a fight. This leads to Wilbur talking man to man to Quackity. Theres some weird sexual tension. Once again they’re trying to outwit one another. That when we get to the crazy stuff. 

And here’s where I get crazy with my stuff. 

Ponk is digging in his lil cave when he accidentally breaks through to a random room buried deep underground. Tommy’s there trying to scam him out of something he has. Tubbo and Ranboo too. When they get to this room Ranboo thinking it’s the panic one and freaks out, but the others calm him down. Ponk thinking theres diamonds in the room storms ahead setting off some traps but surviving. Tubbo opens one of the chests and just says theres a bucket in there. Ponk pulls it out and says it has a named fish in it. 

You see where I’m going. 

They empty the bucket whilst asking what the fish is called. They are interrupted by a voice. It’s Sally. 

Dream had captured her and bound her to a bucket and put her in the chest and hid her from Wilbur. 

She has been released. She freaks out over how much time has past because for her nothing has changed at all. She thought it might have been a couple of hours or something since Dream pulled that prank on her but clearly not. 

They all catch up and the season ends with Sally and Wilbur meeting in front of Quackity, Dream in the shadows and Sally and Wilbur turning to see Fundy who just freaks the fuck out. 

Oh and just a side, Callahan is the last member of the syndicate and God of the server and is having fun playing with the mortals. 

And then I have the next season planned out and how I’d end the whole thing but like until then. This is it. Mid Season to finale. How I picture things happening. 

None of this will happen but isn’t it fun to imagine? 

[that-blue-vault-dweller]

well that was depressing xD lets combine superhero and grieving sole! companions react to sole thats kinda like a medium? maybe they can draw out the souls of the dead so people can say goodbye?

Gosh, I hope this came out okay, lol! 😂💙💛 Sorry it took so long! I was trying to get each of their reactions just right 🥰 I hope you enjoy!

Cait - When she figures this out, she is tempted to speak to her parents one last time. However, she knows that she has nothing left to say to them. At least, nothing that would not haunt her more than she already finds herself as a result of her past actions. Ultimately, she chooses not to ask F!Sole for that and decides to just leave the past as it is.

Piper - As soon as she finds out, she has someone in mind that she'd like to speak to--- her dad. When she finally asks F!Sole, she summons the man for Piper and Nat. When Piper sees him, she immediately tries to hug him. Unfortunately, due to the fact that he is just a soul, she cannot actually touch him and instead feels cold chills wash over her as she goes through his form. She almost cries at that fact alone. However, she starts to speak to him and tells him how much she misses him every day and that she avenged him. She saved those people in their old settlement and Mayburn is taken care of. He tells her how proud he is of her and how far she's come. He tells her that he knows his baby will keep doing great things. He tells Nat how much she's grown and how he's very proud of her, too, and that they should keep watching after one another. Piper tells him that now it's not just the two of them and that they have F!Sole, too. She also explains that F!Sole is her best friend and keeps them both very safe. He thanks F!Sole for her efforts and he tells her how happy he is that his kids has someone like F!Sole in their life. Piper and Nat are a blubbering mess when the time finally comes to say goodbye to him permanently, and they both tell him how much they loves him before he disappears. Piper then hugs Nat tightly, comforting her baby sister as they both cry. F!Sole stands nearby sadly. However, Piper soon extends her hand, and F!Sole takes it carefully. Before she knows it, she is yanked into the embrace with Piper and Nat, and the three of them just hug it out.

Curie - When she discovers this supernatural ability, she requests that F!Sole bring back Doctor Burrow so that she can tell him of her progress. When F!Sole brings him to this world, he does not recognize Curie at first. She proceeds to explain and reintroduce herself quickly. He soon recognizes her, and she explains that she is so, so happy to see him and that she successfully finished the antidote to every molerat disease. She also tells him that she has successfully created upgraded stimpaks and explains the science behind it with eyes practically glowing with excitement. He tells her that he is very proud of her and that she has done excellent work. Just before he goes, he wishes her luck in her scientific career and she starts to get quite emotional, expressing that she misses their camaraderie and that she will always remember him. When he is gone, she starts to cry, and F!Sole heads over, enveloping her in a tight embrace.

MacCready - After he realizes, he hesitantly asks her if she could bring Lucy back. When she brings her back, he reaches out, somehow knowing he cannot touch her, but still wanting to try. His hand goes through her face and cold washes over his skin rather than the warmth of another being. He proceeds to talk to her about Duncan and tells her all about his sickness and how F!Sole had helped him to save the boy. Lucy thanks her for helping to take care of Duncan, and MacCready and she talk for a little while more about their life together, recalling the good times they had. When it is time to go, he tells her how much he loves her and how he will miss her always. She tells him that she loves him and that she wishes she could stay forever. But it is not meant to be. As she disappears, he silently eyes where she had been, tears in his eyes. He asks for a bit of time alone after that, working to pull himself back together.

Deacon - When he finds out, he is hesitant to take advantage of it. He wants to see Barbara, but he is worried that if she truly was a synth, what if she does not have a soul to bring back? Plus, what if she did not recognize him after the amount of facial changes he underwent. That would likely be more crushing than even her possible lacking of a soul. He ends up resolving to just leave it alone, although it terribly bothers him and nags at him for a while until he eventually lets it go as best he can.

Codsworth - When he finds out, he is surprised by her ability, but soon enough asks to see sir. When she grants his wish, it is for the both of them. As soon as he appears, F!Sole wants to hug him more than anything. Codsworth practically has a meltdown, telling him how wonderful it is to see him and how he has tried his best to maintain the house during the whole time he has been gone. He just chuckles and tells him that he has done a great job with the place considering that it has been through a nuclear fallout. Codsworth then wastes no time in explaining how wonderful F!Sole has been and how she has become a hero to the whole Commonwealth. It is then that her husband directs his attention to her, almost as if he just realized that she is there. He approaches her and tells her that he loves her and he is so sorry that he did not protect Shaun well enough. She assures him that everything's okay now and that he did the best he could. Codsworth and F!Sole both tell him that they miss him so, so much, and he reciprocates. When it is time to say goodbye, F!Sole tells him she loves him and he tells her that he loves her, too. When he disappears, both Codsworth and F!Sole are a complete mess and they turn to one another for comfort.

Hancock - When he figures this out, he wants to speak to his real brother-- the one that was replaced by the Institute phony. When he sees him again, he does not reach out to him, despite the fact that he wants to. Somewhere in him, he knows that he can't actually touch the man before him. His brother proceeds to explain that a copy of him, no doubt from the Institute, killed him, and Hancock agrees, knowing that is the truth after the entire ordeal in Diamond City. McDonough tells him that he misses him and honestly wishes he could still be with him. Hancock expresses the same thing, feeling his heart clench a little in his chest. When it is time to say goodbye, McDonough tells his brother he loves him and to keep protecting the people's rights. Hancock reciprocates, and tells him that he will remember him every time someone shoves a tato down his shirt and slaps his back. When he disappears, Hancock excuses himself, needing a minute to recollect his composure.

Danse - When he realizes she has this power, it takes him a while to muster the courage to ask her to bring him Cutler. When his soul arrives, it is as a super mutant. Danse steels himself, truly not wanting to talk to his old best friend in this form. Cutler tells him that he is happy to see him. Danse is quiet for a moment before explaining that he is not a human, he is no longer part of the Brotherhood, and everything was a lie. Cutler informs him that he does not care and that he knows no matter what Danse is that Danse has always been there for him and has been nothing but a great friend. Danse sorrowfully tells him that he wishes things could have been different and that Cutler had not been turned into a super mutant. Cutler tells him that he did the right thing at the time and that the Brotherhood would have likely forsaken him that very moment if Danse refused to kill Cutler. When a final goodbye inevitably comes, they both clap their fists over their chests as a final send-off. Danse deflates as soon as the man disappears, and F!Sole approaches him, hugging him gently.

Preston - When he finds out, he asks to speak to Colonel Hollis. She quickly complies, and when he appears, Preston offers him a salute before greeting him and telling him all about what happened to the group of settlers that he managed to save after the Quincy Massacre. He explains how F!Sole came in and saved them all and has proved herself to be the next General of the Minutemen. He tells him also how the Minutemen are rebuilding considerably, and how much better things are now that she has joined. Colonel Hollis turns to her and congratulates her on a job well done and tells her how pleased he is that she has dedicated her time to such a wonderful cause. When the time comes, all three share a salute, and he disappears before them. Preston and F!Sole then head off for a walk, talking about Hollis and his accomplishments.

Valentine - When he figures out about her powers, he feels himself having quite a few conflicting feelings. There is not really any people in his own life that he would like to see, but there are so many that he remembers as a result of the old Nick Valentine and the people that he loved. Ultimately, Valentine does not ask her to bring anyone back. No one in the old Nick Valentine's memories are going to know this person, and there is no use in it. However, it does still hurt him even though he knows it's best.

X6-88 - Assuming that this is after blowing up the Institute (if F!Sole chose that route), he would like to speak to Father.  When she grants his wish, she tries to keep her face turned away from him. After all, it was not her request and he was not brought back for her to speak to. X6-88 wastes no time in explaining that he is continuing to keep an eye on F!Sole and is trying to persuade her to see their vision despite the fact that she continually refuse. Father looks at F!Sole, but does not say anything to her before commending X6-88 for his efforts. When the time comes, they both share a stiff goodbye and it is finished.

Dogmeat - Does not understand, but would never want to see anyone except for F!Sole. He loves her so much, and she is his person. In his eyes, there is no one else in the world but her.

Strong - Is very confused. How can tiny human bring back dead people or super mutants? When dead, you dead. It ends up angering him and confusing him completely. Puny humans are just so weird.

[publickoccurances]

Hi! remember me? the guy who asked for the minutemen military, Maybe you could do a part two if (you can) where it’s kind of like an alternative good ending for the minutemen where they don’t turn into an imperialistic authoritarian military dictatorship.

I don’t mean to sound ungrateful, you did an amazing job writing I just kind of want a good guys ending and bad guys ending for the minutemen

I can certainly give it a try friend! Due to personal beliefs on military agenda I’m not going to have as much to write on the good guys side of things. But I’ll try my best!

2297. Ten years since the Minutemen took back the Castle and started their full integration into the commonwealth. Approximately 87% of Commonwealth settlements were within the ranks. DC was at 63%, resistance from the BoS was making things more complicated. 70% of Mojave settlements were within the ranks. 48% of New California, the NCR still had a strong hold on the majority of this area. The Wasteland was slowly but surely integrating into the ranks. Ten years of progress. Who knew where they would be in a further ten.

Cait: Ten long years later and here Cait was. Doing something she never even dreamed she would end up doing. She was out here helping people. A lot of people. A lot of helping.

Perhaps the years had softened her. There had been a time where she had once been so selfish. Hated the idea of giving her all to help people she didn’t even know. Sometimes these feelings did take over. Sometimes she did believe she was giving too much of herself. But it was her job now. And she kind of enjoyed it.

She was second to the General of the Minutemen. Sole always came to her for advice on how to proceed with certainly policies, to double check their decision making. God knows why they decided Cait would be the best for that position. Maybe it was her brutal honesty that made her seem to be the ideal candidate. She was more than happy to voice her opinion. As she had always been.

It was another one of those days where she had been called into the Generals office early in the morning. This was something you didn’t enjoy so much. A night of drinking at the bases bar lead to bad hangovers. One of which she was experiencing this morning.

“Mornin’ Sole.” Cait grumbled as she closed the office door behind her. “I’m telling ye’ now, this best be important cause I’m nursin’ one hell of a hangover.”

Sole rolled their eyes, arms crossed over their chest. “That’s General to you.” They joked lightly before standing up, hands behind their back.

“Yeah yeah.” Cait slumped down on the chair. “C’mon, what is it this time.”

Sole laughed slightly, pacing around the room slightly. “So I’m heading to Diamond City today, the Mayor had agreed to sign the agreement pact with us. We’re going to be joining their Miliita with our own forces.”

“I already knew this.” Cait groaned, tipping her head back.

“Yes. But. We’ve also made a break through with Goodneighbour.” There was an excited tone in Soles voice.

Cait sat up slightly, looking more intrigued in the conversation. Her eyebrow raised slightly. “Really? I know the Ghoul Bastard said he could win them over but I didn’t believe him.”

Sole clapped their hands togethers. “Well. He’s made a breakthrough. The people have agreed to attend a town meeting with one of our representatives. But I’ve got to be in the city so-.’

“No!” Cait stood up, arms crossed against their chest. “Sole I have told you this more than a hundred times. I am not doing ye’ political speeches for ye’.”

“Cait... you know I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t need you to.” Sole gave her that look. The ‘we’ve been friends for ten years’ look.

“Yer manipulating me.” Cait huffed as she looked down at the floor for a few moment. “God damn it... fine. But I wsnt next week off.”

Curie: Curie hummed softly as she walked through the Castle ground. There was a spring in her step today. And she was going to discuss the reason why with her General, with her friend, Sole.

“Morning Monsieur’s.” She waved at the security guards standing outside Soles office.

They saluted Curie, she was well respected within the ranks of the Minutemen. She had saved a large percentage of their lives on the field of course.

“Mornin’ Ma’am.” They responded in unison.

Curie stepped through the doors, giving her dear friend a nod of the head. “Morning General. I hope you ave’ had a good day so far.”

Sole grinned and stood, a big smile spread across their lips. “Morning Curie. I have had a brilliant morning.” They assured. “How has yours been?”

“Well Madame/Monsieur... I do not wish to get ahead of myself but...” She placed some paper work in Soles hands. “But look at zhe progress I ave’ made with my current research.”

Sole took a few moments to look over the paper work their friend had just passed to them. They skimmed over it quickly, humming softly. It took a few moments for it to click but suddenly they were grinning excitedly. “You- optimisation of stimpack application and effects... this- Curie this is going to save so many lives!”

Curie couldn’t help but clap her hands together excitedly. “Yes! It most certainly is!”

Curie had been working on this research for the better half of ten years. It had been her way of furthering science. If she could figure out a way to optimise the effects of the current most advanced form of healing the body, she could save a lot more lives.

“I ave’ managed to cut down the time it takes for pain relief to be felt by more than alf’... and Stimpacks can now elp’ give the heart a jump start of administered directly to zhe chest!”

Sole took a deep breath as they placed the papers down on their desk. “Curie I can’t believe it.. this is amazing.”

“Madame/Monsieur... I could not have completed this research without the elp’ of the Minutemen. The past ten years ave’ given me the time and resources I need to complete this.” Curie gushed. She had always strived to further science, it was her primary objective. And she seemed to have completed a part of that objective.

“Curie. Without you the Minutemen would not be at the level we are.” Sole rested their hand on their dear friends shoulder. “Each settlement working with us now has the best health care the Wasteland has ever seen. And thats thanks to you.”

Piper: Headline of the week: Minutemen in the City. No that was week. How about ‘Cities New Militia.’ No. That was worse.

Piper groaned as she looked around her office. Her office. Wow, she had a real office. In a building that wasn’t her home. Wow. Ten years ago she would have never had imagined this.

Going from a little paper sold around the city to a paper that was distributed across the country. It was crazy. Every settlement working with the Minutemen distributed it. It was so big now that she had to take Nat on as a another writer. She didn’t have enough time to write weekly papers herself.

The reporter sighed when she heard a knock on her office door. “Unless you’re bringing me reports from the settlements don’t come in!” She called.

When the door opened she turned around with a glare, expecting a security guard, but when she saw Blue her glare turned to a smile.

“Hey Blue- I mean General? No I mean Blue.” She nodded with a decisive look before smiling again. “You need something?”

Sole took a seat in Pipers office, smiling back at their friend. “You don’t remember? You asked me in for an interview?” They raised an eyebrow.

“I didn’t, did I?” She mumbled as she checked the calender on her computer. “Oh god I did didn’t I.” She rubbed her temples.

Sole chuckled softly, shaking their head slightly. “Don’t worry about it Pipes. You’ve been busy, the papers been a hit. Everyone’s anxious for the new issue.”

“Oh god tell me about it!” Piper slapped her hand down on her thigh. Even though she seemed irritated in that moment she cracked out in a smile. “I can’t believe it Blue. My paper... my stupid paper Thats got me in trouble more times than I can count. People out there are reading it... anxious for the next issue.”

Sole grinned and nodded their head. “I actually have some exciting news regarding that.”

Piper raised an eyebrow, watching her friend closely. “Oh yeah?”

“Well...” Sole tapped their finger against the desk. “With Diamond City joining up... we’re going to see an influx on donations and income.” They explained.

Piper was too impatient for the explanation. Even ten years later she was still a ‘get to the point’ kind of gal. “C’mon Blue, don’t leave me hanging here. If you’ve got a new story you’ve got to tell me!” She reached for her notepad.

“Piper it’s not a story.” Sole laughed softly, taking the notepad from her. “What Im trying to say is... I’m increasing the funding to the paper.” They murmured, watching their friend closely. “By a lot. I mean a lot. Enough that you can hire staff to help. Get more papers out there.”

[damagedsmile]

//Hullo hullo everyone, just flying in here with an update & I apologise for taking so long about it.

So its been a tough time for everyone with C-19. Ireland is going into another lock down. I hope yall are taking care & regardless of your opinion on the matter, I hope yall are being respectful & safe.

Life has been abit topsy-turvy for me. Im learning that grief is just a series of moments where, when you least expect it, you spontaneously combust with tears. Ive had good days but a lot of days where it do be just hanging on by your nails & wondering when the rabbithole ends. So basically I'm at a point where I really don't know how I'm going to feel the next hour, the next day... yanno. I've had moments where I feel ready to return here & do something small but that feeling always changes to the opposite; I'm being careful with discerning what is a manic whim & what is real. I think that's a very important skill for anyone in this position or with mental health issues to learn, so im learning something new this past while.

I have not been able to write anything or draw for months now. Its very frustrating & depressing in itself as I am a creative person & often feel smothered when unable to create. I just have no energy or ideas & am very resentful of myself for feeling things that disrupt my hobbies. But I know i need to feel & go through this so am not pressuring myself. I'm focusing on keeping myself clean & fed & practicing good sleep hygiene; once I can master these three fundamentals, I can focus on other things.

Its funny, I think, that life experiences can alter you so much that you forget how to be human in that you find yourself forgetting to eat & unable to perform daily self-care routines & unable to show love towards those you know you love dearly. To sum it up, I think its fair to say this is the lowest point of my life & its been both horrible & eye-opening. I feel like a burn victim, without skin, everything hurting & tiresome & feeling seperate from myself & my former life. In that same perverse way, that part of me is abit thankful for c-19 because it means I don't have people coming close to me & hugging me & generally being sympathetic: I find im loathing that behaviour now. I don't want to be the person whom suffered a great loss that everyone needs to comfort, I just want to be a person that people treat like normal.

I opened the door the other day to a Traveller woman trying to sell me bedsheets & she said "ah take that, it'd be a grand present for your ma" to which I said, "my ma's dead". It was easier to say than I thought it would be & it was actually a relief to say it & receive a fumbling apology, "I'm sorry, my ma's dead too." I appreciated that more than receiving a hug or a pat on the back. Not that a stranger would do such things, but yanno. We had a moment like saluting each other & I bought pillows off her, the end.

I hope I'm making sense. I hope no one takes offence to this. This is just my feelings, my journey. I've been calling myself a child of grief, making this journey to a port in a storm where i can start a new life on that port & begin anew once I've shed this old skin thats dried out from salty tears.

I've been playing TS4. I started the Asylum Challenge on medium difficulty. I have Joker there ofc with 6 others. I did have 8 Sims but Jared Leto died in the pool (he went for a swim instead of sleeping ffs). We've had 1 Asylum baby that was adopted away for obvious reasons. Currently Enoby Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way is trying to get with Rob Zombie's creepy twin, Bob Zombie. Joker is hitting it off with my Sim whose aesthetic is inspired by Emilie Autumn. I called her Kathryn Wheel cuz of the torture device/HIM song.

I got two rat kittens for Valentines Day (not sure if I've told you before). They're Fancy Rats but with blue colouring, which I've never seen before in breeds. I called them MizPah & BoBoBetty. The Precious got a new snake, a BEL he calls Helvita but i call her Boo.

I got my hands tattooed a wee while ago which wasn't as painful as my neck but painful enough that I'm relieved theyre done & healed up. I'll try remember to post pics whenever. My memorys been a bit scatty with meds. Im also working on losing weight again so I've been very tired & grumpy when I'm not huddling in a nest of blankets growling at The Precious when he enters my space. The only way he earns my trust each eve is to give me coffee & tell me im being very good. Is this a joke? YOU be the judge...

Anyway. Im alive & still working on myself. I thank yall for your patience & support, it means a lot to me knowing my friends on here are rooting for me. I'm toasting yall rn with my iced coffee (still trying to perfect the recipe but im getting there). I hope yall are doing well & are happy, safe, & healthy. Remember I love yall & wish you all the very best, even if I'm not present or feeling sociable. We'll all get through this, i promise you. Remember that you only really see light when things are very dark 💜

[terribluh]

i wrote this for me

ive got this zadr au in my head ill never do anything with and its not particularly special bc every iz fan comes to this inevitable zadr au lmao

this got very long and probably ooc lmao rip dont worry u dont have to read it in fact please dont read this i did not format this at all and i did not proofread 

basically dib and zim are dating and dibs home situation has deteriorated, and in light of irkens managing to escape the florpus hole, they kinda go, “lets be young and free and run away together” and so they go to space!!! i feel like these self serving jackasses probably wouldn’t join the resisty straight up?? theyre too dumb for that, like yea dib has a hero complex and zim would probably love to be incharge of people but alas, dibs actually an asshole and zim probably wont hurry to align himself with irken enemies despite kind of being one himself.

so they float through space. things r kinda bad kinda good, but theyre surviving. the irken armada isnt exactly after them, but i imagine they probably have a run in with irkens who just start trying to kill zim and realize avoiding irkens is something they should do. the idea that zim terrifies the tallest is hilarious bc then they operate on a, ill avoid u if u avoid me basis and thats such a concept bc im thinking dib and zim become space pirates. will be honest, got a lot of inspiration from ravagers in gotg bc thats an aesthetic and i was way into kragdu at some point in my life. also im a slut for space operas.

they r in space, kinda keeping to themselves and stealing things. they become space cryptids. i love the idea that they become space cryptids lmao. zim is just such a small irken and dib is this tall gangly human and no one knows what the fuck a human is. lots of humans are fucking weird to other aliens stuff. also i love the idea of them in a fight with space bounty hunters or something, and dib gets shot and just keeps going. this strange lanky figure in a dark coat with blood spilling from his injured shoulder just not going down. and zim as an irken is functionally immortal anyway so theyre like an unstoppable team. i love battle couples! 

i like the dynamic they could of had in canon, someone made a post once, where zim wouldve been the one to fight and dib wouldve been mission control, but i think in this au, it would be the other way around? or more equal idk. zim has to learn to do the talking bc dib dont speak alien, and dib has to protect zim a lot. and then over time they just pick up each others slack lol. i just like the idea of dib being kinda intimidating looking, which when paired with zims shit eating grin is such a combo. 

theres probably a scene where an alien is like ooh scary bounty hunter that even the fucking irken armada avoids and is scared shitless but its just dib. and dib, never having seen this kind of alien before, starts asking a million questions and is just kinda offputting/adorable lmao and then zim has to drag him out. 

anyway things keep like this, they hash out a living on stealing and trading. their number 1 priority is avoiding the massive and any irkens out there. maybe dib misses earth. maybe zim misses… something. the ship they have is kind of scrap and very much homebrewed, all stolen parts and mishmashed pieces and it was originally zims voot lmao, but zim is a genius and dib is a membrane and it still works. zims house computer is in the ship now and minimoose lives in the vents.

and then theres gir. i love gir but also i feel like theres a lot of untapped gir related angst like, gir is essentially scrap??? shit breaks 

they shut him down a lot for his own good bc he malfunctions sometimes and its awful bc zim loves gir. 

and then one day, zim and dib making a run for it, dib scooping zim up and hoofing it with the alien in his arms shooting over his shoulder and yelling at dib at the same time. and someone or something hits gir hard enough he shuts down, eyes dimming into black and collapsing mid giggle and zim loses it, destroying the attacker while dib grabs for gir and checks his internals and has no idea how to fix him because nothing seems wrong. 

and this is something like the breaking point. things were ok, but now things arent. maybe zims pak is broken, has never worked properly, is dying, and they get by with scraps and parts but its very borderline. and the ships basically scrap and supplies are always tight but they make do. 

but then gir shuts down, and suddenly they cant keep living on scraps and avoiding the armada. bc they need to fix gir no matter what  

maybe theyre like theres no parts enough to fix him oh no, but look theyre right around the corner from the massive and it just so happens the resisty are attacking so zim and dib are like. “were really doing this arent we” and the computers like sigh ok 

they really intend to grab a random sir unit and cannibalize it for gir and jet but zim cant keep his mouth shut and suddenly theyre arguing, fighting their way through some irkens that are really just doing their jobs and had the misfortune of running into zim and dib making their escape and its really strangely easy. zims kind of an op destructive force and dibs so used to fighting zim at this point these irkens are like ants and theyve been in space for like a decade at this point, and theyre always in danger anyway, and its easy to get into the swing of it. shoot shoot stab kick yell at zim blast an irken. 

and next thing they know theyve busted through the door to the bridge where a showdown is happening between the tallest and the resisty leader and everyone deer in the head lights. 

both parties yell “ZIM????” like the beyonce meme and zim instinctively goes “yes it is i ZIIIIM” and dib facepalms behind him the tallest are like panicking and the irkens milling around start gunning for zim and the resisty in equal amounts and theyre severely outnumbered and zim and dib start fighting for their lives foreal this time 

and zim yells, “computer! bring the ship around!!!” and dib is like “zim if i die like this-”, “you won’t zim guarantees it.” and its kind of romantic but theres plasma beams everywhere and a deactivated sir unit in zims arms and theyre both hurt but thats what its like, thats what its always like for them and honestly they wouldnt change it for anything. 

maybe dib gets zim to go on ahead and escape without him with the sir unit, or zim goes on ahead himself all i have a plan. and dib is mistaken for a resisty agent bc he obviously isn’t irken and unwittingly teams up with then and then all hope seems lost and dibs like “we’re screwed- “

and gir blast through the glass of the ships bridge all, “Maaaryyy i missed you!!!!”

“gir youre ok!”

and then gir barrels into dibs arms, dib jolting back from the impact with an oof 

“i died but im ok now!” gir screams as he cuddles into dibs neck  

and its v cute but dib is kinda preoccupied with not dying and hes just like “thank fucking god get us out of here” and girs eyes flash red and he salutes “yes sir!” and jets off by grabbing onto dibs back with his tiny hands and thats when the ship pulls up. zim is in the drivers seat and everyone fucking sees him because hes screaming, why is he screaming? hes zim, of course hes screaming. they get away all well and good but lmao their interference was enough that the resisty was able to escape with far less casualties than they wouldve had. 

bc they were losing, real bad lmao zim and dib saved them but they dont even care because that wasnt what they were going for but to the resisty theyre heroes and to the irken armada theyve declared war. and dib and zim are just like “our actions will not have any negative reprecussions no siree.” bc theyre idiots!! 

their actions have negative reprecussions. 

and then they join the resisty. 

and at some point dib goes home and reconciles with his family and gaz kicks his ass 

anyway i just love the idea that zim and dib dont do nothing on purpose but every damn thing they do affects something big. like some kinda cosmic karma, i amn jus standing herr kinda thing lmao a lot of coincidences and pure luck shenanigans. 

an overarching theme of “everything in zim and dibs lives suck except for how much they love each other” 

[headfullofstories]

Truly Monstrous Luck - part 4

After half an hour or so of sitting alone in the dark, I decide to go out and explore some more. I put my journal in my backpack and fish out my binder, taking off my shirt quickly to slip it on over my head before throwing the shirt back on. I decide to leave my bag here, lock my room behind me and walk as quietly as I can down the hall of rooms. There are a few other people milling about, most walking the opposite direction, most of them giving me odd looks as I pass by. I keep my head down and let my feet carry me through the winding corridors. 

Eventually I find myself back in the greenhouse, moonlight spilling in through the glass ceiling, shifting and shimmering through a layer of water blocking this place from the rest of the world - is this Turtle Pond? Or some other body of water?

The butterflies are all asleep, but now lightning bugs populate the air. They hover in the air effortlessly, tiny stars filling the great big space of the greenhouse. They start to float around me as I walk in and take a spot over by a pond full of lily pads and lotus blossoms. I sit there for a few minutes, examining the greenery floating on the water, when I hear a voice behind me say, “Damn, I’m usually the only one in here this early.”

I jump several feet to the side, turning to see who just spoke. A girl with moss in her hair and piercing orange eyes stands in the doorway. She walks over to me, and I see that her feet are bare and covered in vines and greenery, decked out in dirt covered overalls and a light blue t-shirt. She studies my face for a moment, crouching down so we’re eye to eye. My breathing is shaky and erratic as I try my best to calm myself down and slow my heart rate down. Her eyes narrow as she takes in all of the details of my face. I chew on my lower lip nervously, hoping to ground myself a little more. After looking at my face for about 10 seconds, her eyes wander down towards my neck and land on the bite mark imprinted in my skin. As soon as I register this, my hand flies up to cover the mark as her eyes widen. 

“You’re a new vampire.” She remarks. “Been almost a year since we’ve had one of you here.”

I give a shaky nod and slowly uncover the bite mark again, sitting up straight as she backs away. “I’ve had a really bad 24 hours.” I mutter as I begin to fidget, hitting the heels of my hands together. “Being in here has made me feel a lot better. I was in here earlier and I ended up getting covered in butterflies.”

She gives a slow nod. “Well, if the insects all like you this much, I guess I can trust you.” She reaches out a hand, “my name is Calla. Resident dryad.”

I grab her hand, which is rough and covered in calluses. “I’m Victor.”

“Well, Victor, do you have any interest in magic?”

“Magic?” I echo, and all of the air is suddenly pulled from my lungs. “What… what kind?”

“Depends on where you get your magic from.” She responds. “You seem to have a real affinity for nature, have you ever had any interest in druidic magics?”

“C-can I even… channel nature magic? I’m not… alive anymore.” I ask, fidgeting getting slowly worse. “Do you need to be alive to use life magic?”

She thinks about it for a moment, shifting to a sitting position. “I don’t think so. I’ve never met a druidic vampire, but you seem to have a strong connection with this place.”

I manage to largely control the fidgeting, but my eyes wander to the lightning bugs floating in the air. “I think… I’d like that.”

“Great!” She smiles, “You probably have stuff going on today, being new and all, but I’m here most nights if you want to talk.”

I give her a thumbs up, then get up and start to walk around looking at all of the different planter boxes. 

As morning light starts creeping through the glass ceiling, an hour or so after the lightning bugs have settled back into their hiding places, and Calla has located herself up at the top of a cherry tree and is currently browsing her phone, Arthur ducks his head in through the doorway. 

“Hey Victor, you free?” He inquires, “Yvonne said you were probably in here.”

I nod and pull myself to my feet. I turn and wave good-bye to Calla, who gives me a 2 finger salute in return, then run over to where Arthur is waiting in the doorway.

“No backpack?” He asks, and I shake my head.

“No, I came down here at 3AM. Didn’t think I’d need it.”

“Jesus kid, did you even sleep last night? You still need to sleep, yknow.”

“Yeah, I fell asleep at like, 7:30 or something yesterday.” I assure him. “I woke up at 2:30 and got restless after a little bit.”

“Thats… actually more sleep than I usually get. Good job, kid.” He remarks, lightly patting me on the head a couple of times. I smile at that.

We set off down a new set of hallways, away from where I’ve mainly been until now. There are more people down this way, and most of them don’t even bat an eye when they see me. I’m glad that they’re not staring like everyone else I’ve met so far, but the number of people in the enclosed space of the hallway makes me a little nervous. Most of the people are a lot taller than me, too, and some of them look like they could snap me in half like a twig. I stay close behind Arthur, trying to take up as little space as possible. 

We walk for a few minutes, the floor slowly sloping upward, before stopping in front of a room labelled “Office.” We walk in and Arthur gestures for me to stay put by the door as he goes up to talk to a man with ram’s horns and lavender eyes sitting at a messy wooden desk. They talk for a moment before Arthur turns, waves me over, and starts down a short hallway going deeper into the office. The layout of this area reminds me of the offices at all of my old schools, and I don’t know if I like that… at all.

“You good?” Arthur asks, turning around to face me. I shift in place for a moment, before looking at him and giving him an uneasy shrug. 

“This place has the same layout as my old school offices.” I mutter. “It’s making me a little nervous.”

He nods sympathetically. “This place is a lot better than a school office. They actually care about you here, and the lady who schedules all of the gender confirmation surgeries has her office in here.”

My eyes go wide. “We-we’re already scheduling that?” I gasp, starting to hit the heels of my hands together excitedly. 

“Well, why would we put it off if we could schedule it now?” He smiles. “Besides, the faster we get this scheduled, the earlier your appointment will be, and the less likely you’ll be to fuck up your ribs by binding too long.”

I might actually start crying right now. My vision goes out of focus for a moment, and I start bouncing on the balls of my feet. 

“Uh, kid?” He asks, a nervous lilt to his voice. 

I look straight into his eyes, smile creeping across my face. “I’m just… so fucking excited about this.”

His expression softens, and he gives me a nod. “Being a vampire kinda sucks ass. Dysphoria sucks even more ass. There’s no cure for vampirism, but if you get rid of the parts of you that make you dysphoric, it makes immortality a little more bearable.” 

We stand out in the hallway for a few minutes before a woman pokes her head out of the office in front of us. Her eyes are the color of fire and her ears are long and pointed. She has long white hair and pale skin - not vampire pale, but pale enough to be odd.

“Arthur, good to see you.” She says in an unnervingly calm voice, then looks over to me and smiles. “Who is this young man?”

“This is Victor. He’s new.” He sighs. “We’re looking at getting him in with the top surgeon over at Moonlight.”

“Excellent!” She exclaims, “Why don’t you come in and sit down?”

Arthur heads in first and I follow close behind him, nervous of this new person; she gives me really bad vibes. 

The office is clean and smells like rubbing alcohol; it makes my head hurt a little. There’s a pair of cushioned wooden chairs on one side and a spinning desk chair on the other. Everything is organized - the macbook, paperclip box, and pencil container sitting on the desk look like they were aligned with the edge of the desk with a right-angle ruler, and the mesh waste paper bin is empty. The entire energy of the room makes me deeply uncomfortable.

 As soon as I sit down I pull my legs up into a criss-cross, and the woman grimaces a little, though she says nothing. I start tapping my fingers against my legs, and I have a hard time focusing on any one thing in the room.

The woman clears her throat as she begins to talk, "So, Victor, you're interested in top surgery?"

My focus snaps to her immediately and I nod my head vigorously. "Very much so. The… thought alone of people seeing my chest makes me nauseous and just… having them makes me really uncomfortable."

She nods, and opens up her laptop. "And… how old are you?"

"Twenty."

"Do you have any legal documents? An ID?"

I shake my head. "My wallet got stolen yesterday, and I didn't have a driver's license or a social security or health insurance card or anything like that anyways."

"And that answers my third question." She mutters as she types. "And… you are a vampire, correct? When were you turned?"

"Yesterday." I mutter, "at 10:30AM or so, I think."

She continues to type for a few more moments, then starts to mutter under her breath before speaking again. 

"Okay, Victor, the soonest appointment I see here is September 15th. Does that work for you?"

My eyes go wide. "That's… that's only 3 months away."

She nods, and repeats the question. "Does that day work for you?"

I nod vigorously again. "I don't have any prior obligations anymore."

"Excellent!" She smiles, types a little more, and closes her laptop again. "Victor, you are all sorted. It was good to see you again, Arthur. Make sure you're remembering to take care of yourself."

"I will." He sighs, and stands up. "Well, if that's all, Victor, you were going to see your brother today if I remember correctly."

I nod, and quickly get up to follow him as he heads out the door. 

"That was Eleanor." He says once we leave. "She takes care of all of the medical expenses and legal stuff around that.”

“I don’t really like her.” I remark. “She reminds me of the therapist my parents sent me to when I was 14. She said I was a crazy little girl and that I’d never be able to function at a normal capacity, but refused to give me any diagnoses.”

He gives a sympathetic nod. “Well, Eleanor’s really nice - she takes a little while to warm up to new people, but she’s a good person.”

“That’s nice to know.” I mutter. “I just hope I don’t end up being an exception to that niceness. That happens to me a lot.”

He lets out a deep sigh at that. “Some people just attract misfortune. And it fucking sucks when you’re one of those people.”

“There are people that have it a lot worse than me.” I argue. “I had a perfectly fine life and the access, money, and ability to take testosterone and wear a binder.”

“Kid, yesterday you were unemployed, homeless, and had no money, not to mention that you were effectively murdered.” He points out. “That sounds fucking horrible, and your suffering shouldn’t be discounted because other people ‘have it worse’ than you.”

“I wasn’t homeless. I got evicted, but I could’ve just stayed with my brother. And I called my bank to cancel the card that got stolen, so technically I’m not broke, I just… don’t have access to my money right now.”

“I don’t care how much you try to belittle your struggles, Victor, I’m not changing my mind.”

“I… well, you’re not changing my mind, either.” I grumble.

“We’ll see.” He mutters. “I can be very persuasive.”

[peacekeeper-xiv]

The Second Shard

Ikara had spent the night arguing, and then making up with Beta, but the next morning she was determined to contact as many people as she could think of that Lloire might want to fight. First at the top of the list was Helene. She just hoped the linkpearl frequency was still the same. Testing it out a bit she called over the pearl, "Helene, its Ikara... you there?"

There was silence on her hand for a few beats before the line came through crystal clear. In the distance came the heavy rumble of a giant waterfall along with the usual sound of her armor shifting against itself. "Ikara! Long time no see, yeah?"

Ikara breathed a sigh of relief that the linkpearl connected and was beaming on the other end, "Hey! I'm glad you didn't change linkpearls. It’s been too long! How are you?"

Steels slid into the sheath at her side and she let out a long exhale. "Ahh, ya know. Keepin' busy! Wouldn't change lines unless I lost it, yeah? Gotta keep up with people." She could hear Helene dusting off her gloves together. "Oh! Got married. That uh, yeah sorry I didn't invite ya. Was kinda sudden. But hey! You sound like you are doing well, yeah?"

Ikara blinked at the news and squealed happily on the other end of the line, "Oh my goodness!! I am so happy for you! I mean... you should have invited me... but Uh.. I have kind of been out in the burn for moons anyways, so it’s not like you could have reached me. Man... I really want to catch up, but you know how things go. I've got some good news and bad news, and I'm guessing you want the bad first."

Chance had been looking over the ledgers with the quartermaster and growling over some of the expenses when he looked over his shoulder as Helene went from a smile to her more serious expression. Work almost never made her wear that look, so he could safely bet it was something more personal. A heavy sigh left the wolf but he'd let her finish her call before pressing for details. Besides, there was still plenty he needed to work out on the books.

Helene Ashton had pressed her hand against her ear as if it would help make the call as crystal clear as possible. "Figured ya had some reason aside from catching up. Hit me with it. You need help? You okay?" Her footing shifted into a balanced stance out of habit.

Ikara laughed a little, "One of these days I am going to call just to shoot the shit... but really I always feel bad doing that. With the way folks I know are, they are likely to be in the middle of a battlefield." She sighed a little and considered, "Well, on the plus side I have good and bad news. Good news is me, I'm actually excellent, but we'll get to that. I don't even really know how to easily explain the bad. Its magey bullshit that Niisan... I mean Lloire, Lion... well shit... no wonder... too many names, Anyways, Lloire did some dumbass magic crap to himself. He is... okay, ish. It’s like his aether is a big old mirror and he put his fist through it, and now he has a bunch of different personalities and is intent on fighting all his friends to prove to himself they can protect themselves or some bullshit. So, he will likely try to find you and pick a fight with you with one of his... now many facets. I already fought one of them. They are entirely made up of his aether, but it didn't seem to physically hurt his real body when I kicked his aether butt."

Chance frowned. If her words weren't enough to put him on edge, her sudden statuesque nature certainly was. A low growl left his throat, rumbling enough to put the quartermaster on edge.

Helene Ashton had fallen silent and let her statuesque form scream for her. A deep breath was pulled, and she looked down to the ground. “Okay…ish?” Her lips pressed together, tensing her muscles through her neck. “Aye, aye I see. You’re okay though, yeah? He didn’t hurt ya too bad, did he? I’ll sock him one extra If he did. He would want me to.”

Ikara waited on the other end for Helene to say -something-, and when she finally did Ikara breathed a little easier. Helene was so used to weird shit from the Order, she just needed the important stuff to know how to win. "He is okay, I think. Its, like he only has a certain amount of control over it. I mean, looking at his aether is disturbing, and I offered to try to fix it, but I mean, I'm not sure I could have. I'm fine, promise! I won! I mean, I almost didn't, Niisan is a pain in the ass when it comes to his magical talents and now I have to figure out what the hell that last spell he used was, but no, I'm fine. I realized at the end of the fight that his .. facet is made of Aether.. and well, that is my specialty... manipulating aether.. so I just kinda... disrupted the whole facet. I may have had my eyebrows singed off though, but thats okay... they'll grow back."

Chance spun around at her last words looking furious. He wasn't fool enough to react without the full story, but this had begun to sound domestic and if Lloire had put his hands on Velestine, there was going to be blood.

Helene Ashton heard him shift behind her and she cast her bright emerald hues over her shoulder to him. It wasn't going to help the fire, she was 'Shield' more than 'Hells' in that moment. if protective had a facial expression, she was the poster child of it. Helene Ashton then muttered a bunch of incoherent colorful commentary low enough that only a word or two could be made out. Stubborn and Fool, respectively and clearly not meant for her Wolf.

The quartermaster had tried to regain Chance's attention, but with the look Helene wore, there was little chance of that. He simply growled a dismissal and the man gave a hurried salute before beating a hasty exit.

Helene Ashton noted the poor quartermaster and couldn't help her smirk. She continued the conversation, though. "Glad you are okay. Eyebrows or not, I’m bettin' you're still cute so don't worry about it, yeah? Said you didn't hurt him, right? Nothin' you did had any affect?"

The merc was now both angry and confused. He paced slowly back and forth, waiting for an explanation.

Ikara huffed a laugh, "Like I said, they'll grow back." Thinking on how to explain it she finally settled on an answer, "Well, the real Lloire, like his physical body collapsed. This ... second Lloire, appeared. It was entirely made of aether, but a physical thing. Like, if I cast spells at it, it bled, I burned its arm off. But the damage I did to the facet didn't appear on the real Lloire. I'm not a hundred percent sure what killing it would do to his main aether to be honest, but he claims that it should actual mend what’s wrong. Though, again, I don't know. I basically disrupted it and reshaped it into a staff instead so he could always still have access to that part of himself, without taking the risk of breaking it. I don't know how it would go in a physical fight to be honest. I know you -can- win, and you -can- hurt it, but these facets are how he sees those parts of himself, so they are a hard fight."

Helene Ashton cast her features up to the heavens and let out a hard exhale. "Aye, well, I can't shape aether or even cast any of it so I am gonna have to do it the old fashioned way an' hope. Thanks for the heads up, Ikara. You call Vele--no, wait, it's Lion. He wouldn't give ya that info. I'll call his girlfriend and give her a heads up, yeah?"

Chance was even more confused now, but his hackles went down ever so slightly. Her words about doing it the old fashioned way seemed to annoy him more though.

Ikara perked up a bit, "Oh! I did headbutt it in the face and crack his nose, so physical hits work. I um.. he mentioned this new girlfriend of his. I told him he didn't need to fight folks, he needed a therapist, he said he tried that and ended up dating her and that he'd introduce me later, but yea if you can get a hold of her all the better, cause I don't know how."

Helene Ashton then laughed. "Oh, aye, he is dating his therapist alright. Wait 'till ya meet this one, Ikara. He has tried so hard to run from her. Anyroad, once this is done, we should have dinner at Lion's place an' you can meet her and my Husband, yeah? He owes us after this."

Her 'Husband' huffed as the conversation seemed to derail and stopped pacing. Whatever the news was, obviously Helene didn't see it as terribly threatening.

Ikara laughed and had a big grin that could be heard in her tone, "That sounds like a really good plan. We'll make him cook for all of us as contrition for being a dummy and I can meet people. Just, I wanted to warn you cause I don't think he will go with a surprise attack, but I didn't want you to be unprepared. Also, tell your new Husband that I am asking very nicely for him to please not kill my big brother for being a dumbass. I would really appreciate it. I imagine anyone that you marry would be perfectly willing to put him in the ground for hurting you, so yea.. speaking of... so that good news.. something good to leave off on anyways, Beta proposed annnnd after I stared at him like he had grown a second head, I said yes. Sooo eventually I'll get to invite you to -my- wedding. Not anytime soon though. We aren't in a hurry."

Helene Ashton still was holding her balanced stance and tightened frame but given her armor, that wasn't showcased as easily. Her tone was still 'forced' in a way he may pick up on. Helene Ashton then turned some to look at Chance. Now he could see that it was on purpose. "Ayyy!!! 'Bout time!! Congrats girly, I will be there front row and center for your big day. We will talk more on that and get back to easy conversations soon, yeah? I should talk to Wolf before he pounces on me here. He's givin' me the look of death since this is one sided convo, yeah? Thanks for the warning, though. I'll update ya if he shows."

Chance was unsure who she was speaking with and took the tone at face value at first. He rose a brow as she continued though and shook his head at her 'look of death comment' but held his tongue since it was clear the conversation was wrapping up now.

Ikara giggled across the line, "Oh yea, I didn't realize he was there, oops! I should have. Yea we will catch up soon. Kick my brother's ass yea, but don't go killing him or he can't cook us all dinner. Go and I'll talk to you soon."

Helene Ashton gave a curt nod. "Aye, aye. Miss ya, kid. See you soon."

"Miss you too. See you."

With that, she took her hand down from the pearl and twitched her nose enough to shift her wrinkles about on her cheeks. “Oi..”

The merc crossed his arms, his expression not changing one ilm. "So... who needs to die, and who are we congratulating on something?"

Helene Ashton cleared her throat. “Ikara is Lloire’s little sister in the fact he ‘adopted’ her into his care. She’s the one that called. She’s marrying his ‘son’ Beta. So, there’s the good news, yeah?” She then shifted her footing to dig her heel in as if waiting for the heavy blow. “Lloire’s gone and gotten his aether all shattered or something into different manifestations of his personalities and is off fighting his friends to prove a point. Ikara fought him, burned off his arm and headbutt him and it hurt the ‘form’ of him, but not….his real form. It’s confusin’, yeah? Anyway he ended up burning off her eyebrows in the fight but otherwise, she’s fine. Not shockin’ to me as she is the strongest aether user I ever heard of. But, I’m not. I don’t even have any and he is likely headin’ this way at some point and likely lookin’ to take me on.”

Lloire Peace, sort of, stepped into the doorway and lifted his visor. "Not you, actually, Shield sister." The spear was drawn from his back and pointed at Chance. "Him. He's your other half... I would know that he can defend you as easily as you can defend him." Chance took a step to the side, not even having had an opportunity to ask about the insanity Helene had just explained. "Are you crazy?" The wolf asked angrily. "Who the hell are you to think we owe you some test of our might?" Lloire lowered the spear. "I am Warrenson. A son of Peace. Accept my challenge, or do not... I will accept a forfeit."

Helene Ashton had moved on instinct at hearing Lloire. Given the context of the call from Ikara, her immediate response was to pivot and put herself between her brother-in-arms and her husband. “Oi!” Auburn locks were tied back but had grown long enough now that they collected to the opposite shoulder with the fluidity of her motions. “Lion. Let’s just talk this out, yeah? What’s got you doin’ this anyway?”

Lloire Peace shook his head slightly. "Not Lion... He'll be here for you later. Warrenson." He frowned as he looked between them. "I was listening... did the girl not explain it properly?" The spear rose again at a movement from Chance and his brow rose. "I hope you are not without honor mercenary... Your wife has asked a question... Do not engage me before I have answered her." Chance sneered but stopped moving. "The hell, Hels... I say I just kick his ass and we can ask him what the hell his issue is after this part's been beaten and broken..."

Helene Ashton huffed and looked over her shoulder to Chance but not enough to take Lloire out of her peripherals. “Don’t kill Lloire. Not sure what these… aether things do to him if they die but don’t attack him directly.” She then set her sharp gaze on ‘Warrenson.’ “Where is he?”

Warrenson grinned at her words and motioned behind him, outside. "The vessel is quite fine. He's resting. He'd thought to come explain it all to you himself, but when I heard you speaking with the girl... well, no sense explaining what's already been said, is there?" He gave her a simple nod. "You can check on him if that's your desire." His spear arm stiffened. "But I would have an answer to my challenge first." Chance growled and moved to Helene's side, placing his hand on her shoulder. "Idiot's gone and gotten broken as fuck in the head... but I doubt that makes him less dangerous... Your call, wife... He's your brother... Shall I oblige the ass, and kick it?"

Helene Ashton had always been the type not to swing too far off into the emotional spectrum of life. When it came to those she cared for, she would shift into her ‘Shield’ persona that she earned the name for. But in that moment, the way he spoke about Lloire and challenged Chance, questioning his ability? Hells hath no fury. “The ‘vessel’?” Chance coming to her side and setting a hand to her pauldron was enough to let the fire out of her veins. Her glare upon the apparition was heated and steady, her palm resting tightly to the pommel of the steel at her side, but she flicked her gaze away to lock it to her Wolf’s own hues. “Fuck him up, yeah?” And oh, how she grinned.

Warrenson smiled at the answer he'd been given. He turned without another word and stepped outside. Chance put down pressure on the pauldron beneath his fingers and nodded as he moved around her. "I love it when you talk sexy like that." His own spear was shook at his side as he moved to follow the false-Lloire and swapped it between hands as though to loosen up his grip. When he was out in the sunlight there was a clear divide between the two. Chance, the golden wolf. Lloire, the silver Lion. "Any rules to this duel of ours, False Lloire?" The other glared at Chance. "You will address me as Warrenson, or Son of Peace. Do not trifle with me, mercenary..." The merc simply grinned. "Shouldn't let me get under your skin so easily False Lloire..."

Helene Ashton winked as he moved around her, but she wasn’t far behind. Stepping out with them, she noted their positions, armor, weapons, the field on with they would play, everything. Both arms crossed upon her chest as she then took the moment to look for her brother.

Warrenson lay unconscious on the ground behind 'Warrenson' near the water. From where Helene stood, he seemed hale and whole, though completely unmoving aside from the steady rise and fall of his chest. Warrenson took a moment to adjust his gauntlets and shook his head. "Outside of the fact that this battle is between you and I, no. No other conditions or handicaps." Chance rolled his shoulders, letting his neck crack several times before nodding. "Alright... Let's get on with this then. I win how?" Warrenson pulled down the visor on his helm and smirked. "Despite the requests of the ladies... You only win if I am completely defeated. Slay me and win... fail to do so and I win... proving you don't have what it takes..."

Helene Ashton tucked her tongue into the curve of her cheek as she listened to the rule set. But again, that grin showed on her features and made her freckles rise. “Never said he couldn’t put you in your place. I said he can’t touch my brother.” She pointed to Lloire by the water. “Far as I’m concerned, he can hand you your teeth one by one, yeah? But if my brother starts feelin’ the pain, I’m gonna take issue.”

Warrenson scoffed. "The vessel will remain whole. Do not worry." The spear was rose aloft and he spun it once before settling into a stance. "Ready yourself mercenary!" With that, the battle began in earnest. Warrenson struck first. He leapt into the air and came down, getting the jump on Chance with speed that the mercenary had not expected from a mage. It was a glancing blow, but it stung all the same. Especially that Lloire had drawn first blood. "Remind me again Hels, what all is this asshole trained in?"

Helene Ashton shifted her footing as Chance took the hit first, but she kept her features neutral for the moment. “…Everything.” Arms tightened upon her chest as she adjusted them to get comfortable. “He spent a lot of time with every weapon he could get his hands on.”

Warrenson took a step back, letting the weapon in his hand twist around to his side again, 'allowing' Chance a moment to recuperate from the attack. The mercenary frowned at his wife's answer. "Well that's just -great-... Fuckin' Gillionaires... too much damn time on their hands, not enough real work to do." Chance shifted his left shoulder again, adjusting his grip on his own spear. "Well, there's something to be said about specializing." He charged Lloire, forcing the Hyur to lift his lance defensively. The mercenary feinted though, slamming his own spear into the dirt and using it to launch dirt and sand up and into the other's eyes. Warrenson stumbled back wiping at his eyes angrily as Chance rushed forward with the followup attack.

Helene Ashton winced at Chance’s response to the information but smirked as Warrenson was faked out. Memories. “He an’ I have that whole ‘hero’ complex in common, yeah? I know my way ‘round a few weapons so I can be ready. Same for him.” Holding conversation as if Warrenson was nothing more than a trainee being tested, she kept it casual now and glanced around the area, but Wolf would know her best. Her footing gave away everything.

The wolf was many things... but a hero, was never among them. Prideful, conceitful, no. He was practical. His enemy was blinded. His enemy was agitated. Pride was a weakness to exploit. His spear found its mark. Between scales, center mass, he buried it so far into the other Hyur that even Helen could see the other end from her position. Warrenson gasped out as the weapon rammed through him, blood splattering Chance in the face as they were now but a breath apart. The merc remained stoic and calm. "Something wrong? Looks like you might've broken a few... vessels there..."

Helene Ashton unfolded her arms the minute she watched the spear tip explode out the back of Warrenson. Pride may have been his weakness, but the sin shown clear as day all over her form for the man who claimed her. A few steps carried her down the makeshift ramp as she looked from her Wolf, to her Brother laying by the water. Little care was given to their enemy in that moment as she was focused on the rise and fall of Lloire’s chest; looking for blood.

Lloire Peace, even now seemed the perfect picture of health. A unique look for him all things considered. Chance watched the enemy carefully as he pulled in ragged breaths and Helene passed. When she reached Lloire his eyes fell to her. "He alright?" He asked with concern tinting his voice.

"I... told... <coughs blood> you.... he was... fine." Chance's pupils immediately dilated as he turned his attention to the enemy whose free hand now gripped tightly to the others spear. Warrenson leaned back for a fraction of a heartbeat before he slammed his head forward, helm crashing into Chance's unprotected face, blood splattering all around it from the impact. Chance fell back, losing his grip on the spear as he stumbled back from the blow, holding his face. "You thought this..." He motioned to the spear jutting through him now, "...would kill me? You know NOTHING about me!"

Helene Ashton had lowered down into a crouch to check on Lloire’s pulse, his breathing, and set a hand over his chest where the spear had hit its mark. All clear. She let out a slow breath before touching his cheek briefly. That was cut short as she heard the collide behind her and quickly rose to look back on the fight. That glare leveled on Warrenson as Chance stumbled back and she took a few steps closer, keeping her hand off her sword so as not to provoke intent.

Warrenson ripped Chance's spear from his gut, now holding both his own and Chance's crimson stained weapon. He was quickly bleeding out now, but seemed in no hurry to fetch a healer nor to slow down. Instead, Chance's weapon was lifted over his head and directed at the merc. "You should have ended it... now your wife has to watch you die... Even if I fall... slaying you will prove the vessel's fears true... I will lay down my life to ensure that Peace survives!"

Helene Ashton dug her feet to the ground and launched herself forward with speed. Despite the armor, despite the weight of her shield, she moved as if neither had been upon her in that moment. Sunlight glinted off the broad surface as she ducked down, leapt, and planted her feet suddenly, swinging her arm wide with enough force behind it to hopefully send Warrenson careening into the pillar close by.

Warrenson hadn't expected the rules to be ignored. He went flying, staggering towards the pillar and crashing into it. Stunned, he collapsed to the ground, shaking his head. "Foul!" He cried and he and Chance forced themselves to their feet. "That was outside the rules! This was between he and I!"

Helene Ashton slowly pulled steel from its home at her hip, letting the song ring out for his ears. Emerald hues were locked dead to his features as she righted herself and rolled the shoulder of the arm that held tight to that shield. Her tone had dipped into a serious edge, yet she smirked. “Like you said…” The sword swung this way and that as she warmed up her hold. “…you know nothing about me, yeah? Lloire wouldn’t kill the man I loved nor would I allow him, to kill Lloire.” Her steps brought her between Chance and Warrenson once more. “Hero.” She shrugged.

Warrenson staggered to his feet. "Very well hero... when the vessel remains broken... we will be sure that he knows it was your interfe--" Before the last word could leave his lips his head jutted backwards with the impact of something slamming into his face. The body that had been Warrenson slid down the stone column until it then fell over to the side, an expertly thrown knife jutting from one of his eyes.

Helene Ashton widened her gaze as the man fell over with a new addition for his trouble. A step or two brought her closer but she didn’t let it keep her attention. Instead, she looked back to Chance.

The merc was wiping blood from his nose with one hand, the other still pointed in the direct of his throw. "Live through that, asshole..." Chance staggered a moment in place before the arm dropped to his side and he frowned. "Thanks, Hels..." He remarked, gratefully. Before she could respond though, the being that had called itself Warrenson began to break apart into the base blocks of aether it had been formed of. They lingered in the air for several heartbeats before then moving back to Lloire and coalescing around him. There was a soft glow there for several moments but soon it faded and Lloire seemed to become restless in his slumber.

Helene Ashton softened at the fact he was standing upright. “Never need to thank me. Wasn’t sure you’d have enough time to throw it.” She then turned back to watch the figure break apart. “We didn’t shake on the rules anyway. Lloire knows our shake.” Her own defenses were up as she continued to watch her brother until he moved. Helene exhaled. “Good. He’s comin’ to.” The sword and shield were tucked away as she approached Chance to check on him. “How’s the nose?”

Chance reached up, growled beforehand, and pushed it back into place, causing a bit more blood to rush. "I'll live." He commented as he tore at a sleeve and used it to stanch the bleeding. "Fucker's pretty tough to take down, even broken as shit like this... I see why you two get 'long..." He moved to her side as Lloire began to move more. "Should we get him inside?"

Helene Ashton scoffed. “Should’ve seen him with an axe, yeah? Downright frightening.” Once she was sure he was alright, she turned and looked to Lloire once more. “Aye. He is likely feelin’ like a truck hit him by now. Also, remind me never to take you on and mean it.” Once more, pride shown in her features as she smiled to him before moving over to where Lloire lay. “Oi, you ‘wake?”

Lloire Peace seemed as though he were working on regaining consciousness but wasn't there quite yet. Chance followed her and shrugged. "I'd hope our vows prevented that all the same..." He wasn't quite clear on the aether and magic aspects of all that had occurred. Warrenson had felt plenty real to him afterall. "Let's get him inside then. He moved to help her carry the Hyur inside. "Maybe he'll be able to tell us something helpful... I don't recommend we just let him go out and try to kill people."

Helene Ashton lowered down and scooped Lloire up under one arm, helping get him up to move. “I didn’t think he’d go as far as trying to outright kill you, yeah?” Concern etched at the corners of her features as she looked to Lloire and then Chance. “I can’t let him leave if he is heading out to kill his friends, yeah?”

Chance Ashton helped Helene with the weight of the Hyur and nodded. "Though, I'm gonna guess with all his magic and fuck all crazy, talkin' him outta it or keeping him pinned down are gonna be tough. But we gotta try, I guess. Maybe find out who is next at least."

Helene Ashton shook her head. “Aye, who knows what his magic can do now. But maybe he’ll talk. Startin’ to think I need to get everyone in the same room and help protect them.” As they entered the barracks, she pushed the door open with her foot and helped take Lloire inside. She then nodded to one of the beds. “There or the bench?”

Chance Ashton shrugged and motioned towards the closest bunk. "There's fine. Not like he's bleedin'. Benedict won't mind." A heavy sigh rattled from him. "I swear... this Lion better not be gunning to fight right away..."

Helene Ashton helped haul her brother to the bed and get him situated upon it. She then dusted off her hands and took a step back. “He said he would be comin’ for me later. Not sure what that meant but if Lion is ‘Lion’, like the nickname I gave him? It’s not goin’ to be a pretty fight, Chance. He is full blood berserk mode in that moment, yeah?”

Chance Ashton's brow furrowed as she explained. "Well, I see no reason I can't give you a hand with him. Doesn't seem these 'rules' of theirs mean shit." A groan alerted the couple to Lloire regaining consciousness and the Hyur reached up and rubbed his forehead gingerly. "Lion'll wait... He's not ready to fight. Wants the other sides to lose before he bothers to rouse..." He shook his head as his eyes adjusted to the light. "Well fought, both of you..."

Helene Ashton turned as Lloire came to. She waited for a beat to be sure he really was alright before slamming her gauntleted, mhigan fist into his gut to take the wind from him if possible. “That was for trying to kill Ikara. An’ you should be -real- fuckin’ apologetic for tryin’ to kill Chance because I am this close...” she pinched her fingers together for him “…to givin’ you a throttling.”

Lloire Peace took the hit with a loud "Umphh!" as she got her wish and the air was robbed from him. He took several moments to regain his breath and moved to a sitting position. "Yeah, I likely deserve that..." He said sheepishly as his other hand reached up to rub the back of his head idly. "I'm glad you're both okay..." He let out a sharp breath and shook his head. "You and Ikara both... Look, Hels, Chance... Let's say I go against this plan... and I decide I don't trust you all to win... Then what's gonna stop Shade or Lion from deciding to just surprise attack and kill the people I care about when they are in control. Right now there's an uneasy truce in my head. They all get a shot to prove they are the side that’s too dangerous to be part of me... that I can't have companions... If I go against that... They are just gonna take control when they damn well please and do what they want like they have been.”

Helene Ashton set her hands on her hips as she listened to the explanation and she was kind enough to at least do that. “Lion…no, droppin’ nicknames for now, Lloire! How is -killin- your companions any fuckin’ better, yeah? You an’ I both know that if you had killed Ikara, Chance, Me, or even Velestine, you would come out of it worse than before. Stop bein’ an’ idiot and let us help. You aren’t alone.”

Chance Ashton nodded, agreeing with Helene, for lack of a better option. This all sounded utterly insane to him. Lloire frowned. "Don't you understand Shield? This -is- me letting you help. This -is- me trusting you all. Maybe Ikara could fix my aether, but the underlying trauma would still be there. It'd shatter anew..." He frowned deeper. "They killed Claudettea... The Galreans know who Velestine is now... That says nothing about you or Ikara... add that to the fact that another one beside Balmora's taken an interest in me... do you really think they'll afford any of us the chance to put me through years of aethereal and psychological therapy? Do you think Shade would...? I trust you all to take out these shadows of mine... To prove to my subconscious that I really don't have to worry that I'll be the death of everyone -else- I hold dear. That not everyone is Aliya or Claudettea..."

Helene Ashton lofted her brows at the mention of Claudettea and her shoulders sunk a little. “I’m sorry ‘bout Claudettea, Lloire. I liked her.” A sigh. “Always have to mess with ya, don’t they?” She could have spit if she wanted to but sucked air through teeth instead. “Why not just gather all your companions and take out Balmora 2.0, yeah? Wouldn’t that prove we could handle it? The Warrior of Light doesn’t even work alone half the time and he has had his own shit to deal with.” A beat was given as she shifted her footing once more. “Look, I get it, yeah? But now that I know you are out tryin’ to -kill- us, I’m havin’ a hard time not packing up and following you.”

Chance Ashton nodded. "Or knock your ass out and go handle the Imperials ourselves, yea?" Lloire shook his head. "I was unconscious the last time I fought someone Chance... It wouldn't really do much good if I can manifest elsewhere..." He returned his attention to Helene. "I get your side... but if you tried, most of the shards would just refuse to fight and I'll stay... fragmented. Is this an elegant solution, even a wise or practical one... hell no. But it's better than slamming a dagger in my heart or turning myself over to the Garleans like I nearly did... so..." He huffed. "You're gonna have to trust me. And I have to trust all of you. And hopefully nobody gets killed in all this and I can be thoroughly proven wrong."

Helene Ashton turned and looked at Chance as if asking permission to beat the snot out of him in some respects. Though she didn’t move to do such, she stood there staring at her husband, taking his presence as a form of strength. She then looked to Lloire. “Couple things, yeah? You try to kill yourself again, and I will find someone to drag your ass back from the void. If anything, you fighting all of us should fuckin’ prove how loved you are by many even when you are as ‘broken’ as you are. Two, when you put yourself together again, you are marching your scrawny ass back here and planning an attack on that Garlean trash that messed with you, yeah? Three, you are makin’ everyone dinner.”

Chance Ashton nearly laughed as his Wife laid out her conditions and simply crossed his arms as though to show there was no arguing these conditions. Lloire listened and nodded, without a word. "You got it. When this is said and done... We'll put together a damned Company of Heroes and go bring the fucker to justice and then I'll hold a victory feast."

Helene Ashton stared at him for a few moments again and lifted an eyebrow. “You don’t think you’re comin’ out of this, do ya?”

Lloire stared up at her with a soft expression and shook his head. "On the contrary... I believe with all my heart that I will. I just need all of you to believe it too."

Helene Ashton wrinkled her nose as those freckles danced with the motion. “That was the fastest you ever agreed to somethin’ I said. So, you either must believe that you will, or you are staying positive so we will.” Both hands lifted to rub her temples then. “But I know you are too stubborn so I’m goin’ to trust ya on this one this time.”

Chance Ashton placed a hand on her shoulder and turned to Lloire. "My conditions now brother-in-law... Since this was my fight in theory... One... You don't have to stay here... you are too stubborn to do so... but you will rest before you go seeking anyone else out... Two... You tell us now who is next... Three... know that if my Wife comes back with even a single digit less than she has now... I'll carve from you anything she loses..." Lloire looked between the two and shook his head with a laugh. "I'll rest before the next fight, don't worry. I have to so my aether reabsorbs properly... I'm close to where my old friend Tyranie lives now... so she is likely next... Anything I take should be taken from me. I accept that... But I suspect she will do fine." He turned to Helene and smirked. "You really did need a Sword... He's exactly what I expected for you."

Helene Ashton glanced to Chance and smirked at his list. The last one made her look to Lloire with a grin. “Good. Glad ya agree, yeah?” His comment on ‘Sword’ made her roll her eyes. “Us stubborn types need someone that enables as well as puts us in check. He’s perfect at both.” Leaning down to get to eye level with him now, a mischievous hold took over her grin. “Sound familiar? How’s that Lion tamer of yours?”

Chance Ashton had to hold back from barking a laugh at her comments. Lloire however looked impassive at the taunting. "We'll have to see. You all have been through more of my..." Chance interrupted, "Insanity?" Lloire continued, "...life than she's had to so far, but she's seen enough to maybe have second thoughts by now. I'll let you know at the victory feast." The blue-haired Hyur made to stand. "I need to be on my way Shield, Sword. Thank you both... Continue to take care of one another..."

Helene Ashton took a step back to let him stand. “Let -her- make that choice this time, yeah? Since you’re keen on us proving ourselves.” She let it drop then and switched gears by coming in to wrap him up in a hug this time. Normally tensing at such a motion, she was rigid for a moment in the start, then settled, giving him one good squeeze. “I believe in you an’ all of us. I will see ya at dinner.” She then let go and stepped back like nothing happened, clearing her throat.

Lloire had been surprised by the hug but returned it with a smile before nodding at her and then Chance. "Aye. That's the plan." He stepped past them both, offering Chance another brief nod of respect before heading to the door. He paused as his hand wrapped around the handle. "Just make sure... you don't hold back when the time comes to face Lion, okay? You have to be at your best." With that, he was out the door and heading away.

Helene Ashton nodded to the comment. “I am back on training regimen first thing in the morning.” As he left, she gave a short wave and looked to Chance. “I’m going to need the best gear we can afford.” Despite her cockiness at the best of times, there was a small hint of fear in her gaze.

Chance Ashton took both of her shoulders into his hands and nodded. "Alright. We'll get it figured out." He smiled, his reluctant rare smile. "And you and I will spare between exercises. You'll be more than prepared for him."

Helene Ashton looked down between them and exhaled slowly from puffed cheeks. “It’s mostly the blows from the axe I’m worried about. He isn’t goin’ to tire in that state and that is how you get at that weapon. You tire the user.” She then looked back up at him and shifted her footing into a relaxed state. “But we’ve got time. First, let’s get ya to Benny so he can heal that nose, yeah?”

Chance Ashton nodded quietly. "Yea, let's go poke the bear." He smirked. "I think his new look will surprise you..." With that he took her hand into his and started for the door.

[juliankinney]

━━ ( alex fitzalan + cis male + twenty-two ) oi , have you seen julian kinney around ? he lives in flat 14 in bedroom 4 ? i was meant to meet them this morning at bean me up before our lecture but he didn’t show . no ? well , shit . if you do see them , can you tell them i’m looking for them ? they’re a 4th year computer science student from madrid , spain & you’ll know it’s them because they might just remind you of a stack of unread books , the sound of keyboard typing at three in the morning , coffee creamer in every flavor , & unprescribed pills if that helps at all . just be careful , he can be a little distant , critical , & compulsive sometimes . —- oh don’t look like that , they’re usually ingenious , reliable , & confident most of the time . ✏ y! , 22 , she/her , cst

alright whats up guys, as jd once said, greetings and salutations!! im y and this here is julian, who i’ve known for two hours but adore already anyway. i usually play dumbass boys and he’s no exception, but i like to think he might just be a little less dumb than the rest of them. so lets jump into it!!! ♡

for starters here is his messy pinterest board that i made.. like i said... it is a mess, and still a work in progress but y’all can have it anyway!! (fun fact: was gonna make him texan but pepper called him country boy and i was triggered!!!!!!!!!!)

backstory:

 julian was the conception of two teenagers in love during the 90′s in spain; a local and a tourist. the pair were just seventeen when they became parents but it was a whole ordeal at the time because his father’s side of the family did not want anything to do with this impregnated nobody. it wasn’t his grandfather’s vision!!! his son was supposed to go into adulthood unscathed by his mistakes!!! as you can guess julian’s mom side of the family were your blue-collared society while his father’s side was more white-collared. at the time his mother was a student and helped her own mom with the family tailor shop while her father worked as a cook in a restaurant. on the other end of the spectrum, the kinney’s were in the film industry and of old money. needless to say, the two families had little in common.

the kinney’s tried to pay this girl off but her family was 100% not having it and after many arguments and empty threats they came to an agreement. said agreement was that julian would have his rightful surname and would stay in spain and the family would receive a weekly stipend for his expenses. in return no one would say a thing to the press— which, honestly was only ever a threat because the kinney’s wanted to pretend like nothing had happened. 

and so julian grew up in madrid with a single mother and the help of his grandparents. as far as he knew his father had died shortly after he had been born and had been madly in love with his mother (that part was true). the only reason he didn’t share a name with the rest of his family was because the pair had never married, which, would have been the truth regardless. everything was fine; he grew up working at the family shop, attended school, skipped school, maintained amazing grades while simultaneously spending 1/3rd of the time in detention, lost his virginity to marisol cordova in her lilac colored room, etc. he had the most basic upbringing a kid could have.

then his father died. his real father. and suddenly, on paper, he was well off. it wasn’t easy for his mother to tell him the truth when his grandfather stepped foot into the one story home like he had seventeen years ago with that sour look on his face, but she was forced to. she had no other choice. devastated as she was (and she was truly heartbroken), she told him the story of how one day during the summer of 96′ she met james kinney, and how the next year he came back. then, his grandfather informed him of his father’s will and how he’d have access to his inheritance once he turned eighteen.

it was... a lot to process, and as julian does when he feels overwhelmed, he got angry. he was very upset with his mother and even more so with this old man he was meeting for the first time who kept calling him shit like ‘his only grandson’ and ‘a kinney by blood’. it was infuriating for julian, and his mother further telling him about their weekly allowance among other expenses over the years did not help. at all.

that is how julian found out his father was a successful actor turned director, generally known for an action packed franchise released in the 2000′s. it was mind boggling— he’d turn on the tv only to see a picture of his now dead father on screen, news coverage of the deadly car accident that occurred during en route to manchester on every channel. it just didn’t make any sense and was very hard to feel sad for. besides, his mother had enough sadness for the both of them. at his funeral, the two had to stay in the back while the family tried to come up with a game plan of how things were going to move forward; james’ widow was not happy to see her husbands former lover and child at the scene. 

anyways in spite the fact that julian wanted nothing to do with the kinney’s, his grandfather had other plans. a vision of his own for the only grandchild his son had brought into the world, and that started with schooling. julian graduated and had no plans for college until his grandfather threatened to contest the will if he chose to stray from the path, and they needed the money; so college it was. a college of his grandfather’s choice of course, and what better place than somewhere closed off enough to distance julian from the outer world but elite in its own right? 

his grandfather’s plan basically is to make him successful, and being that julian has no interest in their world, he’s had to compromise and just live with the fact that julian is just going to be your regular everyday man. he’s only really doing all of this because he feels guilt over the years but not guilty enough to tell the world that there’s an extra kinney lying around (last names are so common right!?!??!) . however, he still wants him to be in the family. as in everyone in the direct family knows of him and he gets to be involved in all family affairs, etc, but julian just does not give a fuck about them fksdhjfs specially because of how they fucked over his mom and how james’ widow is so fucking bitter about the will.

ANYWAYS he’s been at the school for four years now, gets his schooling paid by his grandfather but still has a job because pride or whatever, and will hack into your shit!

personality/hc’s

i love him, he’s sweet but also not annoyingly sweet. as in yeah he’s nice and polite but has no problem squaring up due to his short temper. kind of blunt sometimes though, and either is dumb or acts dumb if he says something that might hurt someones feelings. like oh.. sorry you feel that way ksjfsdkln

super smart???? has amazing grades and constantly does his work; knows how to multitask and balance his life out (for the most part... at least until he burns himself out). an intellectual™ . not an eboy but i guess u could say a little bit of a gamer,, has tik tok downloaded on his phone, the dad friend i guess

is either in one end of the spectrum or the other when it comes to socializing. most of the time though he finds it exhausting,, talking is hard but once he does start talking it’s like shut up dude no one cares about javascript 

has a small pill problem,, he’s got to be successful somehow right !! also drinks lots of coffee and is a fan of coffee creamer, does not like the strawberry shortcake creamer though because ew. only tea he will drink is matcha green tea, anything else can suck it. 

has also developed some ~anxious~ feelings , why ? idk, light trauma i guess. his pill usage sure doesn’t help though! loser! ... tbh maybe his anxiousness has grown over the years because he doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do after school like he has money (that he tries not to use if i’m being honest, would rather use the money he gains from his job which i haven’t decided what should be. leave me alone), and will have a degree, but he’s still just questioning everything?? things have just been weird

sometime during middle school years (idk whats the equivalent of this in spain, shut up) he got into computers and... i’m not proud of this but his first hack was into this girls account that he liked and bro all he wanted to do was see some titties man thats it i promise. that crush did not work out, obvs.

anyways yes he continued down this computer path and made an app during high school!!! it wasn’t successful at all and he eventually deleted it but good for him coding and shit!!! 

would hack into school systems to help out his buds and their grades. yeah they could have just copied off of him but... where is the fun in that lads 

sometime he be just looking up ‘james kinney interviews’ on youtube just to see who this dude was dshjkg poor lad

can speak english and spanish ,, has that lisp thingy spaniards have i hate it but i guess whatever 

kind of messy honestly, can someone clean his desk 

connections

literally anything just hmu i can’t come up with these things tbh

[writingforloki]

Sparks Fly

Chapter 3: Hit me with your best shock.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader.

Chapter summary: Your first combat training session with Bucky goes just how you’d expected it, shockingly.

A/N: I’m back!!! sorry for the mini hiatus, I had some ~personal~ stuff going on.

However, I’ll be way more on top of my writing from now on!!! Hope u enjoy this chapter, as always pls feel free to comment, ask questions and give me some constructive criticism in the comments.

Ao3 link. 

Chapter 1

Chapter 2 

You went to bed feeling a bit more relaxed about your place in the compound, you had chatted with the group and started to feel more chill around them. However when your alarm woke you at 7.30 for your training session at 8am, chill was not how you were feeling. The annoying pinging shocked your eyes open and you grumbled patting your bed to try and find the source of the noise to make it stop. You hadn’t slept terribly to say it was your first night in a new bed, although it definitely helped that the bed was massive and extremely comfortable.

Pushing the covers off your body and letting the cool air do its thing and wake you up a little, you tried not to let the anxiety of a new day in a new place scare you too much, you had half an hour until your first training session and although it seemed counter productive to shower before your workout, you decided the water would wake you up, so you pulled yourself out of bed, grabbed your towel and headed to the bathroom.

You hopped in the shower and let the water run down your body tipping your face gently into the spray to try and wake yourself up. You started to think about what your first session would entail, how hard would it be? Would you embarrass yourself? Would the Winter soldier crack a smile? Were a few of the questions swimming around your brain. Knowing you couldn’t hide in the shower for ever, you made your way back to your room.

You opened your wardrobe to find something to wear to see that it had been decked out with an impressive amount of workout gear, you decided on a pair of black high waisted leggings with pale blue piping at the seam, along with the matching sports bra, you felt bougie as hell, you’d never been so coordinated before, so you pulled on an oversized white tee and tied it at the bottom, feeling better slightly more covered up.

It was 7.57am when you checked your watch and decided it was best if you headed to the training area of the compound, and although you had a vague idea of where it was, it was easy to get lost when all the halls all had the same uniform, slick, chrome finish to them. That’s how you found yourself at 8.05 starting to panic and none the wiser about your whereabouts in the massive compound. You had wanted to make a good impression, and being late didn’t strike you as the best way to do it, you had started to lose all hope until you saw a familiar figure walk through one of the slick doors in the hallway.

“Clint!” you sighed in relief as he spotted you and walked towards you, fiddling with something in his ear.

“Hey newbie, what you doing down here.” He asked head cocked to the side comically. He looked like a confused puppy.

“I’m supposed to have training with Bucky at eight but I got lost and now I’m late and I don’t want him to think I’m a slacker, it’s just these halls you know? All the doors look the same and I feel there should be signs up in this place!” You babble, unsure of whether you’re coherent or not at this point.

“Woah that was not easy for a semi-deaf dude to comprehend but I got the bit where you said you were lost, come on sparky follow me, I’ll deliver you to the grumpy soldier.” He laughed as he took you in the opposite you would’ve headed next.

However you didn’t manage to make it all the way to the gym before bumping into someone else, it was Bucky and he did seemed to fit the grumpy soldier profile pretty well as his face was the blank expression you’d come to expect from him, his mouth set in a straight line and his eyes looking impassive.

“I come bearing your dutiful student.” Clint extended his arm to you and you looked up at Bucky guiltily.

“I got lost, I’m sorry! You guys really should have signs in this place.” You mumbled repeating your earlier statement.

Buckys expression softened and it was only then that you relaxed enough to notice that he had his hair pulled back into a low bun. It was cute, you thought. Wait, since when was the kinda intimidating winter soldier cute? It was only Buckys voice in your ears that alerted you out of your inner man bun related turmoil.

“No worries, I was just coming to see if you were awake, C’mon the gyms this way.” He turned, you guessed he expected you to follow.

“Thanks Clint!” you turned on your heel and gave him a cheery wave as you embarked down the hallway, and he saluted you in response.

You followed Bucky into what you assumed was the gym, and judging by the vast amounts of workout equipment you were in the right place.

“Right, like Steve said yesterday we’re gonna start out light, a bit of boxing and some very light hand to hand combat lessons.” Bucky said as he turned to look at you, his eyes were a steel blue and deadly serious.

“Okay, sure sounds good.” You say and put your fists up doing a few small air punches in his direction before immediately feeling embarrassed and questioning what went through your mind when you decided to do that.

However to your relief the winter soldiers lips quirked into a smirk similar to the one you’d seen yesterday, it was small and it didn’t quite meet his eyes, but it made your embarrassment ebb a little, so you’d take it for now.

“C’mon then Muhammad Ali, time to warm up, you don’t wanna pull anything.” he said softly and led you to the centre of the room, encouraging you to copy what he was doing.

After your stretching was done and you were apparently warmed up, it was time for you to actually start training, to say you were apprehensive about it was an understatement.

“Just to warn you” you said throwing a sheepish look in Buckys direction “I’m gonna be terrible at this, I’m really clumsy, so I’d stand at least 5 feet away in case I sock you in the face, I don’t wanna hurt you.”

He laughed quietly, that smirk back on his face, “I don’t think a punch from you could do much damage sweetheart.” He drawled, coming to stand in front of you.

You flushed at the term of affection, although it seemed more patronising than affectionate, you still hadn’t expected it.

“So first we’re gonna start off with basic self defense, I know you have your abilities but you can’t depend on them all the time, sometimes you may be put in situations where your powers have been suppressed and you’ll have to rely on your fists to get yourself out alive.” His face was serious again and you tried your best to listen and concentrate on what he was saying but it was difficult when his body was getting closer to yours.

“We’re gonna start off simple, basic self defense remember, we’ll get to the combat stuff later okay, so a lot of things can happen when you’re on a mission that you don’t expect, people can come out of know where and surprise you, grabbing you from behind is common if they’ve been waiting for you to turn your back.” He positioned himself behind you, not close enough to be intrusive, but close enough to make you shift uncomfortably.

“You’re gonna wanna think of your attackers pressure points, so if someone came up behind you and grabbed you, like this -” His arms wrapped around you from behind, encasing you in his vice like grip.

“Your arms are pinned down, so there’s not much you can grab from my upper body, so you’ve gotta be thinking lower body, unless you just wanna head butt them of course but that might hurt you a little as well. So your gonna grab just above the knee and I want you to squeeze real hard, you should get the sciatic nerve which’ll distract them enough to let their arms down.” he broke his hold on you and suddenly you felt rather cold as his arms were taken off your body.

You turned to face him nodding slowly, taking in everything he had just said.

“Right so squeeze the leg real hard, possible backwards headbutt if that fails, then what?” you ask, eager to learn.

“You wanna take advantage of me dropping my hold on you, at this point you should be able to twist your body ‘round, so go for the chin.” he says gesturing his chin in the air as if you’d just swung for him.

“Like this?” you ask, fake punching his jaw with your fist punched up.

He smirked as he looked at your hand, grabbing it and gently unfurling your fingers. “No Doll, didn’t anyone ever teach you to throw a punch before? Don’t tuck your thumb into your hand, that’s an easy way to break it. Also for this you wanna be using the bottom of you palm, that way you can get the most force behind your blow.”

He straightened out your hand and demonstrated, pushing your hand against his jaw. You could feel his stubble scrape against your skin. You’d always had a thing for guys with a bit of scruff.

“Right, that, that makes sense.” You mumble as he releases your hand. “And to answer your question, why would anyone need to teach me how to punch when I can just give anyone who bothers me a shock.” you smirk and look up at him.

He smiles back and raises his hands in mock defense. “Thats fair, but let’s practice this again but put it faster into motion.”

Suddenly his arms are back around you in his vice like grip, you can feel his body pressed against your back, and your not used to having any men pressed up against you, never mind super buff super soldiers. You tell yourself that’s what makes you do it, it was the unfamiliarity of the situation which makes you press your hand and force an electric current his leg instead of squeezing his nerve.

He goes down straight away, grabbing his leg and releasing you, while the shock of the situation hits you and you realise what you just did.

“Oh my god, Sargent Barnes- I mean Bucky, shit I’m so sorry I just panicked when you boxed me in, I knew I wasn’t in control enough to be with you guys, i-i are you okay?” You ask, close to tears and frantic as you crouch to match his doubled over position.

“Hnnng yep, I’m okay, it’s fine, you just caught me off guard Doll.” He says between gritted teeth, straightening himself up again and shaking his leg a little.

“I’m so sorry, I- I just can’t always control it.” your voice was shakey and you could feel the tell tale signs of your eyes starting to prickle. God this was embarrassing.

“Hey don’t worry about it, super soldier, remember?” he said trying to catch your eye and failing when you dipped your head and stared at the floor. “Listen, I don’t know how much you know about me, but I’m an expert in knowing how it feels when you’re not in control of your own body.”

You look up at him, his gaze is soft and not at all what you had expected from the steely eyed winter soldier.

“So you’re okay?” you ask “You’re not hurt?”

“Nah Doll I’m fine, c’mon why don’t we leave the one on one combat stuff for a bit and i’ll talk you through basic pressure points, maybe I’ll even teach you how to throw a punch without breaking your hand.” He smiled gently.

What you had been expecting from Bucky Barnes, you weren’t sure, but it certainly wasn’t the level of kindness and understanding that he’d shown you today. It was nice knowing that someone else had experienced the struggle of not being in total control of their body, and knowing he’d managed to change it and take control.

“Hey Bucky” you mumble softly.

“Yeah Doll?” he asks, head tilted to one side.

“I know Steve said he usually trains the beginners but, would it be okay if you trained me, even when Steve comes back from his mission?” you asked shyly meeting his eyes as he looked back at you, his face a picture of shock before he plastered on a neutral expression.

“Of course.” he answered.

It wouldn’t be easy, but maybe with Buckys understanding, you could get better at all this, and maybe finally gain control over your abilities.

Tag list:

@latsyrc85x @jsmith509 @yourwonderbelle @mywinterwolf

[badmousestuff-blog]

The problem with Free Speech (Script)

One day I was helping out with the Free Palestine stall on Church Street. About an hour in a young dude came up to me, and gave us the usual conservative drivel.

He told me that he couldn’t support the left, because to him we were against free speech. Right below me were flyers detailing the extent of Israeli war crimes against Palestinians, and how little the world still hears about their plight. He stated that he wasn’t interested in our campaign, and bid me farewell. For, of course we must have our standards.

(Rowan Atkinson speech)

There’s never been a more unshakeable dogma in my lifetime than that of Freedom of Speech.

The real test of a country’s standards is if it allows people to criticise one another, especially the regime. The foundation of Liberty and Freedom and Friberty, is the story of free expression, after all, if you want to know who has the power, just look at which group you’re not allowed to criticise. Right?

Well no, I’m here to say that Free Speech isn’t just some base, flatline, monolith from which all societies are to be judged like an angelical truth, its a political concept, thought up by human beings, subject to critique, and frankly is in great need of one.

Let’s start with something simple.

Your concept that Free Speech is good, is only possible if your opponent also agrees with you, i.e. they’re not going to kill you if you disagree.

So therefore if your opponent doesn’t ?? and will use aggression against you, then you can’t really argue for free speech can you?

The conditions around you need to be such that nobody is going to die.

Right, whats next, oh I gotta do the Hitler bit, right…

Y’know the story, Weiner Republic, Full suffrage, large democracy, massive instability and debt caused from the prior war, enter the Nazis, and the German Communist party. Yes everyone seems to forget that the Commies were there too, headed by Ernst Thalmann, and at their peak gained 16% of the vote in 1932. Whilst Ernst was forward in his Anti-Fascism, the Social Democrats, and their newspapers, didn’t seem to understand the concept of a united front, they refused to confront the Fascists in an effective manner and simultaneously denounced the KDP as being a bunch of Muscovites, sporting the famous Iron Front symbol, The third arrow originally meant Anti-Communism, mind.

The SPD’s failure to effectively confront Fascism aided Hitler’s rise to power, sent the KDP underground, and Ernst to 11 years in the hole, followed by a firing squad.

So don’t tell me free-speech exists in vacuum, it doesn’t. In this video we’ll ask the necessary further questions.

Who dictates the media, who controls which advertisements we see, which views are more profitable? Does the removal of speech in given scenarios serve a common good? And if the enlightenment was correct why did Liberalism fail in its mission?

(Rowan Atkinson)

This clip was one of the first main intro points for me as well as many others into the realm of Super Free Speech, and it’s strange looking back just how dated it is. It’s not like we didn’t have the arguments back then, but moreso that nobody really cared, we were all swept up in the dogma, to challenge free speech would be on the same level as strangling a baby.

Anybody can go around today and talk about the joy of free speech, but it means nothing to a person who has no power with that speech, Freedom to Beg? That's not a freedom; that’s institutionalised sadism.

I’m not a believer in Maslow’s hierarchy but hypothetically, this really wouldn’t go number 2, it’d be right down at number… 27. Why do I say this? Well in the words of some philosophy guy people say I look like, “No rights matter if you’re dead”.

Food, Water, Healthcare, and Housing. These are all things you need in order to survive, in other words fulfil the other things that we consider ‘rights’ - rights that are worth struggling for. And despite the fact that the millions end up dying from the lack of these rights, even when they’re universally agreed upon, ever notice how this struggle goes very very quiet… Suspiciously quiet.

Sargon on the Socialists

I wonder…??? I wonder why the left seems to be largely committed to these causes, it’s something you find scantly addressed in the middle and right spheres with the exception of private individual charity (OSCAR WILDE), and Carl may find himself wondering why it is that these ideologies can barely create a solid solidarity towards these topics.

You might be a Liberal and say “Yeah yeah, I support that too though” but fact remains there’s no confidence here.

I see no outpouring of condemnation coming from you when Politicians like Bolsonaro press forward their restrictive measures, unlike what you have to say about this powerless Redhead. Why is that?

Count Dankula, who interestingly I had a couple scuffles with a while back without realising it, last year taught his dog to do a Hitler Salute, and he got fined £800. Now that’s probably one of the most petty excuses for a sentencing I’ll admit, but again this isn’t about whether it was justified, it’s about people’s standards.

Dankula received enormous support from, well, everyone, and he’s now more famous than he ever previously was, enough to be at the forefront of the free-speech festival later that year, and even use his fame to help push the emergence of UKIP. This is attention that people would pay top dollar for, way more than £800. He should be proud that he got a court hearing.

Frankly, me and my colleagues didn’t really care about this whole thing too much, just ask my IWW friend who I was with when this all went down. What happened around the same time that did catch some of our attention though was the plight of the J20 protesters who got arrested back during Trump’s inauguration.

Some of these people are on the butchers list to serve 60 year sentences for standing against a president who’s, a real dick, like I get the whole Liberal opposition is fucking corny but still he’s a dick, they’ve all been dicks, he’s just continuing what every dick who ever stood on centre stage ever started, this is America, you think Bernie’s going to save you? You think reforming the democrats can change the number one imperialist power?

Apologies. If you’re at all concerned that I didn’t give a toss about Dankula’s pug joke, if you’ve ever had friends like him this stuff isn’t too surprising, I know these are highly political times but a guy who votes UKIP is really not our number one concern right now.

I didn’t give a toss, but I know somebody who did, Mike Stuchbury, who you’ll remember from his childish twitter ramblings and dealings with Watson. Who proclaimed that the left needs to stand with Free Speech, A free-speech that is largely in the teat of Right-leaning discourse.

Sargon who was there with him, earlier that year got de-platformed by lefty-liberals in his debate with Muke.

The dogma is enforcing itself here, the left is all supposed to throw up our hands in swich liquor, of which vertu engendered is the flour, and decide Whether we should allow freedom of speech to our enemies, or not allow it, when the actual thing we should be doing, is taking hold of the narrative and putting forward our own ideas as the new talking point of discussion, instead of fucking Nazi Pug.

“Hey, you, what gives you the right to determine the narrative?”

Thats a good question, the hegemonic propaganda of our status quo is already setting the narrative, Noam Chomsky “I’m bored bye”

How can I make this more interesting… Ah ha…

IT’S TIME FOR FILM THEORY!!1 WOOOO

-

The Pursuit of Happiness.

In 2006 Will Smith told the story of Chris Gardner, a black man who struggled through poverty, separation, and fatherhood whilst living in San Francisco.

He gets an internship with a sales company and despite having to put up with a lot, by the end of the film he passes and at this point, we’re supposed to feel happy and redeemed, but to those who’ve watched it (surely I’m not alone) was it really a happy ending?

I’ll say that I walked out of the viewing feeling very uncomfortable and sour, but why is that?

Well for starters, that Internship he got was a 6 month unpaid one, in the most expensive US city might have something to do with it.

Then he’s got to deal with his wife leaving him, then he’s got to take care of his son, then he loses his source of income, then he’s got to deal with eviction, sleeping rough, not sleeping at all, by the end of the movie sure he gets his redemption but the message of ‘when life gives you lemons, just keep getting pummelled with those lemons and don’t ask why’ ultimately seems hollow.

Contrast that a more traditionally Anti-establishment film which was made by a literal Communist, where the exploiters are treated as they should be and thats what comes across on screen, with surprise horse-dick, and while Happiness doesn’t treat them like saints, they sure don’t come across as devils either.

6 months of free labour he and 19 other people who did not make the cut that they are effectively giving away for free.

What about those other 19 people, who ever tells their story?

The way his superiors always act like total dicks pushing him around and getting him to be their lobby boy, they lost nothing. And now he’s going to work for them.

Is the message here supposed to be “Well if this guy can survive the moon falling on him, what the hell are you complaining about?” Actually yeah, I think that consciously or not, this is what’s being said… Don’t worry we’re getting to the point of all this.

The extent of exploitation is naked, yet in the way the movie is presented I’m inclined to agree to this, and take it into my home, and sleep with it.

Now name me as many pieces of media that regurgitate this same old theme of rags to riches through adversity, to look at the man on centre stage, yet pay no attention to the millions locked in a cage.

Sure, say it how you will, Art is merely what you make of it and there’s not necessarily any devious agenda being pursued at any time. That’s one perspective I guess, another might be that there’s no such thing as Art for Arts sake, it all gears itself to differing political lines.

In a society based on private, individual enterprise, it's no surprise that Art would also foster themes that would support society as the normal and natural, even if they appear on the surface as radical.

Case in point, well the entire Hollywood Catalog.

On the Waterfront is literally Mccarthyism on celluloid, The People vs Larry Flynt guises pornification and billionairedom with a story of libel and freedom of speech.

And ironically enough probably the worst offender is, well I’m gonna lose some of you now, Billy Elliot, the Movie.

In which 2/3rds of the way through Billy’s dad strike breaks as a way to pay for his son to go to a prestigious arts school, y’know rather than maybe having him stay and use his skills to improve, embolden and enliven the downtrodden community, rather than leaving it to die.

Jackie’s very sympathetic in his devotion towards his son, except Striking is caring for your family, you’re fighting for a better future, together, as one, and it’s thrown away in favour of a much more individualistic get out of your circumstances, go and live your dream.

Now I’ve read Lee Hall, I know he didn’t intend for this to come through, but he is also no more aloof than any of us, we’re all susceptible to this ‘Common Culture’.

Just see the way our ‘Common Culture’ infiltrates into how Communism is talked about, in 2015’s Trumbo. The Hollywood screenwriter who was blacklisted for 2 decades for being a member of Communist Party.

Could make for some groundbreaking stuff right?...

Well no, instead we’re left with a film that focuses entirely on freedom of expression, which is ironic because if they represented him truthfully it would’ve resulted in a much more nuanced movie.

All we get is a 2 minute scene talking about Communist ethics and god its done in the most sanitised, unradical, storybook tale way possible, that doesn’t in any possible regard represent who the actual Dalton Trumbo was.

“If a book or play or film is produced which is harmful to the best interests of the working class, that work and its author should and must be attacked in the sharpest possible terms.”

I think I have a case that profit incentives are steering the way in which media is presented…

We have no problem pointing out the subtle propaganda messages in Soviet children’s cartoons (Cheburashka) but reverse that onto our society, prepare for some awkward stares.

You may argue that none of what I’ve just spoken about here has anything to do with censorship of free expression but this is the problem, our notions of censorship are stuck firmly behind the Berlin wall, and thats far too simplistic not to mention outdated.

Undoubtably Coca-cola has a far greater reach of expression than I ever will be able to ascertain, what says who can speak on a public forum, decide the content of a documentary, of a publication, of a movie, or a political campaign?

If a book is blacklisted by all publishers for political reasons, what difference does it make having 1 publishing house or 100?

If 90% of the movie market alone is controlled by just 7 companies, what kind of advice is “Just start your own business”.

If we want to talk about the free flow of expression and information, what little are these flyers (Free Palestine) when Zionism has a whole nation, and 2 continents supporting it?

This is the kind of expression we’re dealing with today, not the voices of individuals, but of multinationals. The fact that we had in any way an outpouring of sympathies towards one of these companies, Sony, for having their movie The Interview possibly censored by DPRK agents is a testament to how lost in the plot we have become.

And if by chance the media cannot direct the status quo by monopoly, it brings out its tried and tested method.

Commodify it.

I present to you Guerrillero Heroico, this photograph was allowed such free spread not simply because its bloody badass, but because there was no IP designated upon it, by Korda’s intention as a Communist himself he agreed with the free-flow of art. And what did this result in at the behest of Capitalist Corporations? The pastiche of revolution, to be bought and sold many times over.

Take any form of media, word, an expression, it will be hoisted away, slapped on a shirt, and sold back to you at a handsome price. You cannot escape this.

The moment that this (my tattoo) becomes the new Che it loses all its power, resistance is reduced to at worst LARPing, at best Nerd Fandom, and the winners are the profiteers.

If profit is the aim of the game, the speech that is supported will inevitably favour that which nurtures the economy, not destroys it, unless in farce. Speech ain’t a level base of which a country is determined by, its an apparatus held by those that dictate the game.

This is why there is a necessity for us to control the narrative, control the message, because if we don’t, they’re still going to.

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Obligations:

When armies with unequal numbers go into battle, a draw is a defeat for the lesser side.

Make believe it or not Radical Centrist politics have their political leanings as well, even if just by effect.

Look I like free speech, I love it, I’m a goddamn youtuber, but I’m not stupid, I know what’s coming, I know that groups would try and silence me if they could. That’s politics.

You might go “All we’re talking about is the legal sphere”. Firstly the legal is the political, pure ideology to say otherwise, but second it’s difficult for you to call yourself a fighter for free speech when as I’ve explained there’s sooo much more to it than simply the judicial.

Many proponents will even side-step the judicial boundaries anyway when monopoly becomes involved, and if I have to explain how Monopoly is not an externality of our system but an inherent part of accumulation then… sigh.

Strange how we’re usually all skeptical of an Economic Free Market but the Free marketplace of ideas unlocks your inner Libertarian.

Its when I see stuff like this that I begin wondering if this is all just a trend that will eventually die off when people realise the complexities of their circumstances. I remember just a few years ago how many Libertarians were speaking the merits of free speech until they discovered that methodological individualism wasn’t actually achieving their goals. I count down the days when Lauren Southern finally calls for limits on speech just like her limits on borders. After all freedom is not free it must be defended right?

And btw folks usually aren’t as brave to actively advocate limits so they’ll always present justifications, such as that these views are mental disorders, or they’ll destroy civilisation, or these people are Degenerates.

This is a historic moment in political discourse, at this point ultimately we’re interested in picking sides, and you’ll do this just as much as anyone will.

On the left we like to talk a lot about Left Unity. I’m not necessarily against the idea, but a lot of the time people make a religion out of it, glossing over the fact that many aspects of various factions (???) contradict. It might not be immediately obvious, but when push comes to shove these conflicts become very apparent. There are some principles in which each side certainly doesn’t see eye to eye.

“Politics is pervasive, everything is political and the choice to remain apolitical is usually just an endorsement of the status quo”

If it wasn’t obvious, I’m a Communist, yeah yeah say what you want, I believe in the liberation of those who do all the work through armed struggle based upon material conditions. I’m going to therefore be in favour of real mass culture, the stuff that gets people focused on achieving liberating aims instead of just appealing to markets. Its for this reason that I’m not interested in defending the views of right-wing nationalists, fascists, reactionaries… my enemies in other words, the ideas largely speaking which regress the people and they’re not interested in defending me either, wouldn’t expect them to.

If all you’re talking about is the centre, you’re gonna get flanked, sorry.

You might bump in when I denounce Dankula stating “His punishment showcases the system is at fault” and I would agree. This system is at fault, its been at fault since before our constitution was written, and it’ll never stop being at fault until you solve the contradictions.

Liberalism did fail, its ideals never came to fruition and that’s the reason why Socialists bring forth the praxis to achieve it, sometimes that’ll involve using words, sometimes it’ll involve lots and lots of guns, but let me tell you, you can’t always fight a war by playing nice, sometimes you have to use a diversity of tactics to achieve it.

Maybe we need 11 of them? (Shows book)

But thats more of a material answer and I know that most you don’t give a crap about some dead Chinese guy., but getting back to the original idea about responsibilities behind our speech, well, here’s something to think about.

So… here goes nothing.

If you’re a straight white male aged 11-16 in the UK and weren’t brought up to fit into the standard male dynamic, chances are you got picked on, sometimes a lot, sometimes that’s every day, not necessarily violence but words from numerous mouths are highly unnerving.

I did not have a particularly fun time adolescence. Every day was horrible, I never had a feeling going in that this would be exciting or, this would be a day where things would be different, everyday was a total black smudge with no end in sight.

Unlike other people, I never got to have a group that I fit into, so I had no escape, nothing to take my mind off things.

Looking back I don’t know why I bothered going in, I wasn’t getting amazing grades anyway.

When I went to Drama school and other clubs on the weekends and after school, I would also get picked on, but it wasn’t in spite, it was just general, friendly teasing. But there wasn’t a difference in my mind, because when you’ve had to deal with so much constant abuse, and paranoia, and humiliation 30 hours a week, it fucks you up.

So when Id say to the weekend buds “I dont like this” theyd go “Oh come on man its just a bit of fun, its okay, dont worry about it, its just a joke, its all okay”

Back then I didn’t have the nerve, I just put up with it, but if I could go back, Id say. No, actually its not Okay, because you don’t know for the life of me how much I have had to deal with this shit, to me that doesn’t come across like you’re being funny, like your laughing with me, it comes across like you’re a psychopath who wants to get pleasure out of my misfortune.

Of course the response to this would be obvious “Well what am I supposed to do? Just talk to you like a robot. You should just get over it, leave it in the past. Your making it harder for everyone” or some other faux-victimised response.

And sometimes y’know they might be right, maybe I should’ve not made worse a bad situation, but fact remains I still bleed.

To you, this is just having fun and games, to you and your other friends its normal, but to me its a threat.

Now today you can call me what you want I don’t care, I’m out of that place now and I’m all the better for it,

But even though some 7 or 8 years since then I’ve been able to recover, I still carry a hangover of it all, and it affected my decisions later on in life sometimes to a dire extent,

Its had the effect of making me feel both distrustful of people, and also like Im a burden to be around other people,

I never feel I should hang around for too long, I never want to take chances in friendship for fear I’ll embarrass myself, I say one thing out of tempo and suddenly flashbacks and an enormous shadow of mordor conjures over me. And I think most of all its been very difficult for me to express my emotions because I used to do it a hell of a lot.

Those 5 years were the single handed worst years of my life. And if you were at any point responsible for adding to that devastation and humiliation, then a large part of me wants to lash your goddamn skull inside out.

Because as trivial and generic as my story may be, that part of my life has been stolen from me, and those 5 years I will never get back.

So what’s the point of all this?

“Ossidents are sometimes surprised that, instead of buying a dress for their wife, the colonized buy a transistor radio. They shouldn't be, the colonized are convinced their fate is in the balance. They live in a doomsday atmosphere and nothing must elude them”

I want you to place the relatively minor experiences I received as a child, and translate those into other groups, victims of domestic abuse, victims of colonialism, racism, sexism, queer phobia. Like I said I’m out of that place now, but others aren’t, for many people they still live day to day in this ever pressing struggle, trying to just tell people “Please, just don’t do this”.

It’s not okay. But maybe together you’ll help me out with solving these problems?

My conclusion to this is simple,

Free Speech is not just something you can fling around to score political points, it doesn’t materialise simply because we all decide it should. If we want free-speech we need to break a few eggs to make an omelette.

We need to be sure that the conditions in society don’t proliferate toxic ideas that might even lead to the downfall of said society.

This very Tattoo that 90 years ago would’ve been Anti-Communist as hell has become a Pan-Left symbol against Fascism. Its living proof that with the correct methods the conditions of words, symbols, ideas can be resolved.

When class struggle subsides, when our social divides have been solved, when the conflict doesn’t oppose the existence of certain folks, then maybe, we can well and truly say that we can have free speech, and we’ll stand at a comedy show and yell “Yes, lets talk about those BEEP BEEEEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP” and be met with cheering applause from all sides. But until then, Don’t be a dick.