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thurio-edau · 5 months

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SBG GANG MENTAL ANALYSIS

yup, him for part two. funny thing despite Aiden being my favourite character I'm most excited for the other three posts I'll make, especially the last one. there's a lot to unpack here so

also im writing this with a migraine pls read it-

Part 2: Aiden Clark

ah, yes. the obviously-mentally-ill from the start fan favourite Aiden Clark. let's go.

first, I want to start with something I find really important about his character, what makes him heavily mischaracterized in the fandom. the 'psychopath' cliche.

the terms 'psychopath', 'insane' and 'unstable' are often confused with each other due to media stereotypes, such as Aiden here. one, he is not a psychopath. psychopath literally means a self-centered person who lacks sympathy, affection and care; making them far from most other characters in their franchise. their lack of sympathy/empathy often makes them criminalized, here

disturbing content warning, for an example of a psychopath.

let's take Gressil from Homesick for example since a lot of SBG readers also read Homesick. so, here, Gressil is a perfect example of an actual psychopath. his lack of empathy makes him torment others, he's very self-centered. and when asked why he's doing this? he says he was bored. let's look at Aiden here. what does Aiden do when bored? probably dumb ideas or annoy Tyler. not torturing people for fun. Aiden is just a boy who likes thrills, but he has a sense of empathy, care and justice.

you wanna see a psychopathic Aiden?? the canvas is it

(our local Logan hater is publishing the canvas eps go checc beachy out)

but that's him, not our Aiden. canvas does not equal originals y'all

alright, now since we got that cleared out!! firstly, ADHD.

I think everyone in the fandom is already aware that Aiden is ADHD but I'm still going to talk about it just like Ashlyn's autism. Red has also said that she wrote Aiden with ADHD in mind but hadn't canonically confirmed anyone as neurodivergent. let's start with the main symptoms of ADHD, also known as Attention Decifit and Hyperactivity Disorder.

I know about 5 different ADHD people myself and did some research, it probably won't be extremely accurate since I'm not ADHD myself, but I'll try to do whatever I can. first with the AD part, Attention Decifit.

now as seen, he doesn't exactly have any problems with theorizing itself. but the problem is that his attention just goes away easily.

i mean cmon bro was making memes on the job

he tries to do work, but can't. he has a low attention span which makes him not able to concentrate. he can't keep it up for long, he'll get distracted or bored too easily about things that doesn't interest in specially.

it's just distracting. what his attention is on constantly changes, there's more to that after the ADHD part but we're here for now.

the hyperactivity... it's a lot more apparent. but I should explain the insane-unstable thing before that.

insane means that someone's mental health is not in an okay situation, where it prevents the person from thinking normally, acting rationally, very often found together with delusions. the person is seriously mentally ill where it might count as a disability.

unstable, however, where someone is prone to psychiatric problems, has moodswings etc. they're not exactly the most sane person, but they aren't insane either. Aiden here, obviously falls on the unstable side. maybe just a little bit insane if you squint. this will be brought up later too, but it mixed well with his hyperactivity too.

and as we all know, our boy isn't exactly the most stable person. (sorry for the collages, but since there is a tumblr picture limit i have to keep on collaging. yes i learnt from the last time) his hyperactivity mixes with his unstable mindset which makes him incresingly vulnerable to danger- which he likes. from when the first shift happened, he's been really careless about stuff but it's been all about his love for thrill.

and it irritates Tyler, too.

the main subplot about his character is that he's a person of excitement. guess what? ADHD people like the excitement, they like new things, they like the adrenaline and thrill. now, Aiden's main characteristic of being unstable mixed with ADHD makes him an even more reckless person. another thing mixing with the hyperactivity, is boundaries.

this part will mostly be about Ashlyn since the boundary issue only happens with her.

I talked about this on Ashlyn's side on my Ashlyn analysis, now it's time for Aiden's side.

he's really annoying to her at first. Ashlyn is someone with lots of boundaries, like high walls. and who tries to climb them with his dumbass? Aiden of course.

she kept rejecting his efforts to befriend her for some time, until the night they stole the jeep. then she managed to actually bring the walls down, and accept them all into her life. but damn was she blunt.

felt that honestly

and Aiden understands her that night, too.

Ashlyn was hesistant to hug him, yes, he was aware. but she still did which made him realize she was also trying. i have to tell you, people with ADHD and people with autism either have trouble getting along, or go perfectly well. my ADHD sibling for example, I have to push them away for a lot and tell them to lower their voice. but once they remember my boundaries it actually becomes a normal, even pleasant hangout. which, Aiden realizes and tries to get along with. he tries.

seeing his efforts on her boundaries makes something click in her mind. and she starts to be a lot nicer when they hang out in the arcade.

Aiden eventually learns and remembers what she's like and what she loves to do. he already tried to watch her ballet sessions once -got slammed-, he's been to her room where he remembered the mat from and her fighting makes it obvious. I'm sure he knew he'd get cooked by betting that. but he still did,

because he knew it'd interest her. which he succeeded, he saw her smile again. the arcade day went great until Barron and his gang pulled up, but if we ignore that part it all went well. Aiden started to understand and respect her boundaries.

anyways then Tyler fucking dies

he knows that Ashlyn feels guilty. Aiden wants to comfort her through it, but also do it correctly. without going over any boundaries. which makes him really,

really,

really surprised when she responds.

also including this pannel cause its hilarious

here we see that he's still trying. hell, I'm sure he spent minutes thinking if he should come close physically to help her. that's probably why he just nudged her softly before anything else. he's not used to it, he has to conciously make an effort to not cross said boundaries. keeping his voice lower, try to not be so reckless, not doing anything physically close unless she reciprocates. wow how i wish another someone i knew irl tried that hard instead of blaming it on me cOUGH COUGH COUGH

also other small things to include

he's yapping a lot

he has a comically large amount of puzzles in his backpack for one single trip

and sticks his head into lamps for some reason

but that's just Aiden and his little neurodivergent brain for ya.

now the part I wanted to get to the most.

Borderline Personality Disorder.

first, what is Borderline Personality Disorder?

shortened as BPD, borderline is when someone's mood is inconsistent and swinging. think of it's name; the person's mental state is in the border, in the border line, switching up fastly. the most easily understood and common type is when the person goes from a depression to a happy state. but no matter which state they are in and/or go to, one thing stays the same: it is unstable.

one thing about borderline is that it is frequently mixed with bipolar. however bipolar is a neurodivengercy which means it is what someone is born with and cannot be changed. but borderline is obtained later in life. it usually happens with depression. bipolar is much more random and the episodes last longer in comparison. it may last up to hours, and the person's memory might have trouble remembering their episodes. borderline, on the other hand, is a short-lived mood swing.

now here. here's the catch; people with BPD during mood swings can have reckless behaviour, suicidal thoughts -in his case as far as we know, lowered sense of protecting himself- or a loss of understanding danger. sounds familiar?

borderline's recklessness and dangerousness, sometimes self-destructive acts combines with ADHD's love for thrill and excitement, combined with Aiden's own personality all make up for a great condition of instability.

Aiden's behaviour constantly goes crazy, I think his most frequent mood swing might be his normal self (at least, as normal as he could be) to this more maniac way of acting. I noticed it from his eyes, when he's in a more calm-ish normal state his pupils are a bit more dilated. in the pictures above, you can clearly see that he's still in the episode; filled with the adrenaline, the unstable way of thinking.

but, what causes that? surely a mental illness such as borderline doesn't happen on it's own.

right?

cause it didn't.

it never works that way.

but it can get better.

eventually.

but what happened to him?

personally, as much as a large amounnt of people seems to believe it's something like family abuse I don't think so. maybe neglect, maybe withdrawal, maybe maybe. but we've seen his parents. I don't think they would hurt him like that. I can't put any more pictures, but this is the last part anyway. his parents seem to be kind and gentle, despite that picture in his house. I'm thinking the picture was only for the dramatic effect. his parents said that he used to be really calm and quiet during Lily's birthday, and both Aiden and Ben seem comfortable around them. they were happy taking Ben in too, any kind of abusive parent wouldn't do that at least that's what I believe. also there is that Aiden got serious and concerned when he learnt that their parents were also in the facility, most likely worried for his own as you would have thought.

there was a post that I've been trying to find for like half an hour, I commented on it but I can't find the post now. the person talked about their own theory. if I remember correctly it was that when Aiden was depressive as a child, his parents took him to a thrilling activity like the ones he's been talking about (bungee-jumping, skydiving etc.) and the thrill made him actually get excited. which is why his parents allowed him to go even more reckless, because they are aware of how prone their son could be to the depression.

what happened? let's ignore the parents factor. someone can have a loving family and still be traumatized, someone can be taken care of and still feel abandoned, someone can never have confronted a situation they are terrified of.

one of my theories is that, the loneliness. it must get to a child heavily considering children need to not be left alone, but Aiden was. he didn't have any actual friends since they always moved from one place to another from his parents' business, and they might have not had enough time to make for him (which I believe is bullshitting, every child deserves to be taken some time out for. some people quit their jobs entirely for their child.) and be unaware, and that doesn't change that he was still depressed and alone. his depressive state was seemingly before Ben was taken in. now here one thing with borderline, at least from my experience, is faking actions. smiles, laughs, friendships, conversations... almost as if there's two different lives; one fake, and one real. you keep on switching, you keep on swinging between the sides where you're yourself and where you're just mimicking 'normal human behaviour'.

it starts from faking a happy state during their depression, and by time you're faking it it becomes an automatic adition to your personality. to your mind. once it furthers, it becomes the disorder. Aiden we see is always smiling. it becomes a habit that only breaks sometimes. now, I'm not saying his smile is fake- I think his face is literally just stuck like that. it breaks ever so slightly sometimes. fake it till ya make it yanno? that kind of thing. and when he swings from his calm mood to his borderline-d mood, his pupils get small and his smile gets worse. noticably worse. I'll be rereading the series (AGAIN) and this time look at all the small details since Red loves putting them and I love theorizing so

which, wraps up the Aiden thing! im actually really proud of how i could put my thoughts into text which i never could. i'd love any additions because i love other opinions as well.

and you know what? im glad Ash and Ai are out of the place because the rest are what I'm actually looking forward to >:)

...and i should sleep. really.

(wow sorry yall i finished this hours ago and said 'alright reread to make sure its good before sleep' and fell asleep through it lol sorry for 4 hour delay ig)

(leaving for school rn see yall 8 hours later 🫡)

#sbg #sbgblr #sbg (webtoon)#school bus graveyard #school bus graveyard webtoon #schoolbus graveyard #aiden clark #ashlyn banner #sbg aiden #sbg ashlyn

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anonymouspuzzler · 7 months

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you know what? fuck you (heartbreak gulch's my own guys)

(@heartbreakgulch courtesy of the inimitable @strangegutz & collaborators, also miscellaneous Thoughts under the cut bc it's my blog no one can stop me the doors have closed behind you)

HEARTBREAKER BULKHEAD:

Probably does not have superpowers anymore but still came from a family of considerable influence and was under pressure to inherit, pressure which he very much Broke Under.

Turned to a life of crime, definitely got in over his head with it, and essentially got rescued by Eddie, who he is Utterly Obsessed With And Heartsick For.

Has spent literal years as one of Eddie's attack dogs and generally jumping through hoops for him for Whatever Scraps Of Affection He Can Get, though he's still kind of squeamish around Literal Murder and thus tends to be assigned to supply runs and such most of the time.

Amateur mechanic and car enthusiast. Probably did a lot of McGyver-ass fixes around the Gulch-slash-generally assisted Ami til Davey was recruited.

Speaking of, was still the guy who recruited-slash-rescued Davey. They fell for each other hard and are in a committed relationship now, which has helped Buck take a little bit of a healthier step back with whatever the hell he and Eddie have going on (and helped him be a little less jealous and curmudgeonly about the Hot Young Things In Town, ie Zeki and Felix).

Absolutely not prepared to be a guardian to Minnie which has led his and Eddie's whole Relationship to enter a fun new stage of "hey man can I ask you for parenting advice nothing weird"

HEARTBREAKER DYNAMO:

Pretty similar backstory to the Villain-Coded version. Civilian turned criminal, lost his arm when he got in over his head on a job and Buck rescued him.

Has a bunch of different prosthetics he swaps out for different purposes, ie. one for combat, one to use for mechanic work, a kinda general use/everyday one, etc. That said, he goes without a lot to make sure he's prepared for a situation where he doesn't have access/one breaks or fails on a job/etc.

An alarmingly good recruit; I feel like originally Eddie kind of let him stick around as a kind of "gift" to Buck, but now that he's actually got him on jobs he's become a real rising star. Real good in a scrap and is a little more flexible with his moral lines in the sand compared to Buck. Outside of that he works with Ami a lot doing mechanics and repairs - probably interested in learning CompanDroid maintenance/repair but figures it'd be skeevy for him to push that point too much.

He and Eddie have a complicated relationship I think. They'd be kinda suspicious/distrusting of each other but also have a LOT of similarities and work really well together. To say nothing of their respective relationships with Buck.

I don't think he's Trying to Uncle the younger recruits in the Gulch but he definitely Does. He likes White a lot. He and Ami would also definitely get along really well. He is being The Bigger Man and Mature Adult and not giving Felix a wedgie no matter how badly he wants to

HEARTBREAKER(?) MINNIE:

From the same family of prominence as Buck and is currently very much on the run after a failed attempt to kill her own dad.

Extremely a city kid and is Not necessarily adapting well to Middle Of Nowhere Self Sustained Living.

Knew Of Buck but never met him before this so his whole Life and Little Criminal Commune featuring Multiple Guys He's Got SOMETHING Going On With is. it's a lot

Would like to do some crime actually but is A) still a little traumatized and adjusting to the whole Situation and B) 13 Whole Real Human Years Old.

Fascinated by Zeki's whole deal and his work but I think they would absolutely bring out the worst in each other they would fight so much. Autism to autism hostility

Having a very complicated response to White and Ami wherein she thinks they're SO cool but interacting with them at any length would make her realize Things About Herself that she's not consciously ready to confront so just like. Imagine being White and looking over your shoulder and that 13 year old is just Intensely Staring At You Unblinking from around a corner and as soon as she realizes you've seen her she turns around and runs off as fast as she can directly into a wall

Zarita absolutely hitting that Cool Just Slightly Older Kid niche for her.

#anonymous puzzler art #anonymous puzzler originals #villain coded comic #heartbreak gulch #strangegutz #long post #it's fun to put your Guys in a New Situation! love that!!!#fun and interesting to think ok what about you is inherent no matter the setting and what changes when your situation is different #(the funny thing being I don't think a lot would fundamentally have to change about the HBG gang in villain-coded)#(like sure why not we can have compandroids. we can have the criminal haven in the desert. that all makes sense.)

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gatorbites-imagines · 4 months

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Would it be too wild of me to ask for plastic man because my autism chose the silliest guy to be my favorite 💔💔

I dont think this is too insane but I'm literally desperate for any content I'm going to explode I don't even care if it's just headcanons sfw or not or anything I will implode into confetti

this would obviously be with male reader but I don't mind if it's ftm because I am trans so uhmm do whatever

Patrick “Eel” O’Brian

Sfw alphabet

Plastic man has a special place in my heart too, so I get it. have an alphabet.

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

It depends on who you are, but assuming that you are his romantic partner, then I could see him being very affectionate. Both physically and emotionally. Since he doesn’t age or has the ability to die, Patrick would hold onto you and love you as much as he could, since there will be a day where he is gonna lose you. Shows his affection mainly through physical affection, its not unusual for some part of him to be coiled around you whenever you guys are together.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Patrick would be a great best friend, he’s ready to square up with anybody who crosses you, always batting for your team as long as you aren’t extremely in the wrong. He has moments where he would be quite insightful as well, if that’s what you needed. The friendship probably starts because you are a hero, villain, etc, too. Or because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Pat loves to cuddle, he wraps himself around you like a blanket most nights. He will keep human shape if that’s what you prefer though, he just loves to be completely wrapped around you and just squeeze you close.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

I could imagine part of Pat wants to settle down and just live a normal life, but its hard when you have the powers he has. he would be willing to give it a try though, if that’s what you wanted too. I’m not sure I can imagine him as the greatest cook out there, but I also don’t see him as someone who’s against doing chores and manual labor.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

It depends on why you guys break up. If it was something like to keep you safe, then he might come up with some cover or excuse. But if it was for some more painful reason like cheating or something along those lines, then he would be a lot more blunt and just tell his partner to their face that its over and why its over.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Like settling down, I can imagine part of Pat really wants to get married. Hes loyal to a fault when it comes to the one he sees as his one and only, and it all depends on his partner how fast he wants to get married. I could see him as the kind to have dated for a short while and think “yup, I’m gonna marry them”, but he doesn’t want to rush you.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

I think Pat would forget his own strength sometimes, resulting in too crushing hugs or you getting thrown around from he’s excited, but he always apologizes whenever it happens. Hes also gone through quite a lot in his life, so he would have a lot of insight in emotions, but I could imagine its hard for him to talk about at times.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Yes I think Pat doesn’t just like hugs. He loves hugs and he would hug his partner any chance he gets. Just being close to you is a blessing for him, especially if it’s after that time he was “dead” and putting himself back together for thousands of years.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It depends. Some might see Patrick as somebody who would drop the L-word immediately after you guys start dating, but hes also been through quite a lot and has lived a long life with a lot of experiences, so this is an area where I could imagine he takes his time since it’s a very serious word for him.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

I don’t think he gets jealous super easily, since hes sure in his relationship with you. That doesn’t mean he never gets jealous, just that he doesn’t get jealous by small or everyday things. He still get jealous if somebody else flirts with you, which ends up with him hooking an arm around you and butting in in some way.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Like hugging, Patrick would love to kiss. He kisses you all over, littering you in pecks all over your face, neck, hands, etc. but when it comes to kissing you on the lips, Pat would take his time to really put his love in it. he loves to kiss you pretty much anywhere, but he does prefer on the lips. Which is also why he likes being kissed on the lips the most. He comically melts every time you do, since he has the ability to do so.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

In the comics, Plastic Man has a kid or kids, but it all depends on you if you guys have any. I do imagine he’s great with kids though, taking his time with them and letting them feel safe and heard, especially since he grew up with an abusive father. He wouldn’t want kids to feel unsafe around him.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Pat is one of those people I can imagine wakes up refreshed and bright eyed, or is it goggled in his case? Hes always more refreshed than you, but he likes to just lay and admire you for a while. Being stereotypically romantic, Pat would probably also bring you breakfast in bed if you guys have time for that. Likes to wake you up with kisses before your alarm goes off.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

When he’s really tired, Pat will just start outright melting or deflating and collapsing on the floor or on top of you, sighing and complaining about how tired he is. Ends up with you dragging his deflated body to bed where you guys can cuddle, which is one of his favorite times of the day. Because of his powers, I don’t think Patrick needs much sleep, but he wants you to get a healthy amount of sleep.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He comes across as a very easygoing and bright guy, but I think it would actually take quite a while for Patrick to open up about himself and his past, like his childhood or how he used to be a criminal, unless you somehow already knew that, like if you were a hero too. Things would get told little by little over time as he starts to feel safer and deeper connected, most stuff you learn being from comments or things he does without thinking too much about it.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

When it comes to you and everyday things, I think Patrick would have quite a lot of patience. Why get angry about not being on the same page about dinner, or who needs to do which chore, especially when you can live and have lived as long as Patrick. He would get frustrated and angered if you put yourself in danger though.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

He shocks you by remembering quite a lot about you, remembering small details you have mentioned maybe once or twice. He tries to remember important days too, but he never feels bad if you don’t remember it in return.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

When you agreed to be his partner, or if you guys are married, when you said yes to marry him. Other than that, his favorite moments are the small everyday domestic things, like going shopping together, cooking together, or just sitting and watching a movie.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Being a superhero, there is a level of protectiveness in Patrick, especially with the kinds of baddies he fights and the kind of rivalry he has going on. He doesn’t joke about your safety, and would also make sure you teach you how to defend yourself, or get you in contact with other heroes that could keep you safe if he couldn’t.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Goes comically over the top, its honestly charming how much he cares. Like the type to set up a whole thing on the beach with balloons, roses, candlelight and the works. If you don’t like huge shows though, Pat would do something more lowkey but just as meaningful.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

I could see a bad habit of his being not telling his partner when he goes on missions, or dangerous missions. I don’t think he does it on purpose most times, it just slips his mind since its such a normal part of his life. He always makes sure to apologize and make up for it though, and he does try his best to remember.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Pat would act like he doesn’t care too much about his appearance. But I think after a while of dating you, he might start doubting himself, seeing as he has one outfit and one color scheme. Hes pretty good at hiding it, but you’ll figure it out at some point where you reassure him that it doesn’t bother you.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

He would. Those times he’s gone longer periods without his partner always left him feeling hollowed out and like something important was missing. This is also why he does his best to live life to the fullest with you, since he knows there is gonna be a day where its just gonna be him. He doesn’t want to think about it, but he lays awake at night sometimes thinking about it.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

A cat person. He doesn’t hate dogs, he just likes cats more. He always jokes that they’re long and loose like he is, and that like cats, he’s a liquid too.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

If you were a judgmental person, and didn’t believe that people could change if they truly wanted too. With his background and experiences, I couldn’t see Patrick dating somebody who looked down on others, especially if that other person was in a bad spot.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Clingy sleeper, like you don’t need a blanket because he just turns into the blanket and wraps around you like a burrito. Better get used to not being able to move too much at night, it’s like a sleeping bag, or like a bat with its wings wrapped around it.

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aspd-culture · 3 months

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Sorry ig in advance since you get questions a lot but got curious about a few things

1. Is it normal for pwASPD to view unbeneficial relationships as chores? I know I, a likely prosocial, when I don't see the benefit in a relationship, I have to view it as being a chore to continue it.

2. If a connection is established between harming others and being harmed, will a pwASPD, for lack of a better term, be able to mimic empathy or remorse?

3. Do you know if pwASPD and another comorbid disorder, if the other disorder causes already low or fragile self esteem (like another cluster B), can seem like they don't have ASPD?

These are mostly for project research but also out of curiosity because I can

Nothing to be sorry for!!/gen

1.) Oh yes. So very, very much yes. And honestly, it's even worse than a chore - more like if a dead-end job decided to stop paying you but you'd go to jail if you quit. If you've ever seen a kid stuck dress shopping with their mother on TV, that's the way I would like to act through every single interaction with an equal part useless and annoying but unavoidable prosocial irl. Every single non-Exception prosocial is that coworker you hate who won't leave you alone./hj Joking aside, not all prosocials are actually that annoying actually. So it kind of depends; sometimes it's fine at least for me.

2.) Yeah, I'd say so. This goes differently for all of us, but for the most part "connection formed" would probably go in the direction of an Exception, and that's where some symptoms of ASPD are lessened for those of us that have them. That includes often having some degree of effective empathy and/or a desire to work on cognitive empathy with them in particular (I use them as practice to make the necessary use of cognitive empathy less annoying with non-Exceptions). Ditto with remorse for some pwASPD, though for me in particular that depends on the Exception in question. Some still do not bring out remorse in me for whatever reason. This is a good place to note that actually, since I don't think I've mentioned this elsewhere. Exceptions do not all have to be the same even for the same pwASPD. Two friends may have different symptoms they alleviate vs don't affect vs worsen, and of course platonic vs sexual vs romantic Exceptions often vary in that as well. For me and a few other pwASPD I've met, this may also occur with some groups of people who aren't Exceptions but cause an Exception-esque response. For me, kids get that as most do other people struggling with mental health disorders beyond just depression and anxiety (nothing easy about those two it's just in our current world most people have those). If I hurt a kid's feelings, 25/10 times I am going to cry with them or force myself not to. And that will vary for each pwASPD based on how much social neurological development was completed before it was fundamentally changed and started developing antisocially too. Some of us have more empathy than others, or more remorse than others (and vice versa) in general, so that'll impact those situations too.

3.) So this depends on what you define as "seem like they don't have ASPD", though it won't be self-esteem that affects that. Generally I'd point that more in the direction of NPD. But yeah, looking at the symptoms of ASPD, there are a few specific disorders that cause someone who very much has ASPD to not be diagnosed and/or believed both professionally and personally. In personal relationships, it's honestly just not being a serial k*ller that will get most to think you don't have it. Professionally, you're looking at disorders that cause social problems (such as autism, SAD - social anxiety, and GAD - generalized anxiety), impulse control (ADHD mostly), emotional instability (bipolar disorder, IED - intermittent explosive, ODD - oppositional defiance, and yeah your other cluster b PDs). There are others that make a whole lot less sense imo to get in the way of an ASPD diagnosis too. Schizophrenia comes to mind, with some professionals thinking that it's just... so many episodes of psychosis that it starts to look like ASPD which, don't even get me started on how much of a medical failure it is that I have heard of that specific thing happening. But mostly, it's going to be the ones I listed previously. None of these are mutually exclusive with ASPD, but they have symptoms that overlap with or mimic ASPD's, and so you'll have genuinely good professionals who are trying to avoid over/misdiagnosis where it applies to a *very* stigmatized disorder, and you'll have lazy ones that don't care to try and pick out which it is if not both. That will all just depend on the pwASPD's presentation of symptoms. I had more than one professional refuse to believe I had ASPD, and my (very lovely and dilligent/gen) psychiatrist was also leaning to just diagnose autism until I said some line about the reason I try for social interaction not being because I want to but because everyone has to to be able to get what they need in life. Once she realized I see it as an irritating requirement to associate with other people - even ones I kind of like - she quickly turned on that and diagnosed both. That's why it's important to speak openly and with as much of the mask removed as possible without getting yourself in trouble. They will try and avoid labelling you with something like this unless they are 1000% sure because of its connotations and the social and professional implications of having ASPD. It is very possible to pick out which is which or if it's more than one with overlap in regards to any set of comorbidities even outside of ASPD, but it takes a lot of work for that to be done properly especially if you're still masking in front of them.

I have no issue with anyone asking just out of curiosity by the way. Seriously like I guess I see why some people feel weird about it, but genuine interest is the reason why disorders get looked into, researched, and potentially normalized and accepted. There is nothing wrong with being interested in any topic as long as you're respectful in your interactions with sensitive subjects, and this ask was completely respectful, so I'm happy to answer it./gen

Plain text below the cut:

Nothing to be sorry for!!/gen

There are others that make a whole lot less sense imo to get in the way of an ASPD diagnosis too. Schizophrenia comes to mind, with some professionals thinking that it's just... so many episodes of psychosis that it starts to look like ASPD which, don't even get me started on how much of a medical failure it is that I have heard of that specific thing happening. But mostly, it's going to be the ones I listed previously. None of these are mutually exclusive with ASPD, but they have symptoms that overlap with or mimic ASPD's, and so you'll have genuinely good professionals who are trying to avoid over/misdiagnosis where it applies to a very stigmatized disorder, and you'll have lazy ones that don't care to try and pick out which it is if not both. That will all just depend on the pwASPD's presentation of symptoms. I had more than one professional refuse to believe I had ASPD, and my (very lovely and dilligent/gen) psychiatrist was also leaning to just diagnose autism until I said some line about the reason I try for social interaction not being because I want to but because everyone has to to be able to get what they need in life. Once she realized I see it as an irritating requirement to associate with other people - even ones I kind of like - she quickly turned on that and diagnosed both. That's why it's important to speak openly and with as much of the mask removed as possible without getting yourself in trouble. They will try and avoid labelling you with something like this unless they are 1000% sure because of its connotations and the social and professional implications of having ASPD. It is very possible to pick out which is which or if it's more than one with overlap in regards to any set of comorbidities even outside of ASPD, but it takes a lot of work for that to be done properly especially if you're still masking in front of them.

#is the culture unmasked?#who knows?#tw sex mention #aspd-culture-is #aspd culture is #aspd culture #actually aspd #aspd #aspd awareness #actually antisocial #antisocial personality disorder #aspd traits #anons welcome

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thequietkid-moonie · 2 years

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The Forger with an autistic child

[ PLATONIC HEADCANONS ] [ Anya, Loid & Yor ] [ Spy x Family ]

I HAD to do this, I wouldn't be in peace with myself if I didn't do this, seriously is just that they are a really cute family 🥺🥺

You were in the same orphanage as Anya, you two were really close friends, for being consider weird for the other kids you two always stuck together (you were the only one Anya talk to)

Anya may not understand exactly your autism, but she understand that there are things that makes you uncomfortable or even hurt so she help you avoid them, also she doesn't see anything bad with your "strange behavior", she easily adapt to whatever you do/need

Whenever you go non-verbal or semi-verbal is not a problem, she can easily read your mind, that could make you find out about her power, at first she try to cover it, but at the end she will admit it but beg you to keep it as a secret, and you do

When Loid come to adopt a kid and get interested in Anya she makes sure he adopt you too, she wasn't planing to leave you behind, and thats how you became officialy a family

You had your own room, but if you had problems adapting to your new house Anya offer you to sleep together in her room (or yours), but if you decline she will let Chimera in your room to make you company (Anya give to Chimera the important mission of keep you company at night until you get fully adapted and comfortable in your new house)

It won't take long for Loid to notice your autism, but he won't say anything right away, first will try to find out if you know what is autism and that you have it, knowing it or not he will take time to explain it to you and try to discover how exactly affects you

Loid have an incredible power of adaptation, and if he need to adapt the house for you to be comfortable he will. He will make sure your room is decored at your liking and full of things of your comfort!

Also, Loid is really caring with both of you (even if he doesn't want to admit it), so he is going to be careful with how he treat you until he identificate all your needs, he will memorize them to take them always in consideration

If you have food sensory issues then he won't cook with whatever you don't like, and have no problem with cooking your comfort food whenever you want, but also will try to keep a healthy and balanced diet. Still, if there something you dont want to eat Anya will eat it for you if you eat her carrots

When he meets Yor and offer her the deal he makes sure to tell her about you, at first he just tell her that you have autism but when they get married and she move to the house thats when he give her more details about your condition and needs

To be honest Yor really wants to be your mother but is scare to do so, she is scare to do something wrong and upset you, specially if are having troubles to accept her (changes can be difficult to handle)

Yor will take the longest time to adapt, but that doesn't mean that she didn't likes you. She will try to remember all the things that triggered you or the things that help you to be able to take good care of you

For a while she probably were so nervous that even treat you like if you were made of glass, so Loid will have to reasure her that its fine, she didn't have to be so nervious or careful, he will teach her how to approach to you, even Anya will try to help! (and if you yourself approach her, maybe to apologize or to reasure her that she is fine Yor will be on the verge of tears)

They always try to avoid whatever triggered you, but in case you ended getting overwhelmed both are quickly to react and help you out. Anya too, since she can read your mind she could easily know when something is bothering you and she is ready to help you too

We know they are pretty protective parents, so in the case that you get overwhelmed or even start getting an anxiety attack by someone's fault they could take care of it rather easily (Yor is more direct while confronting the person), if it was an accident with an apologize it would be fine, but if that person did it in purpose then they won't be able to get away so easily

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drawnthejayys · 4 months

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Meet my BLU Team OCs !!

Info/Bios under cut!

Dr. Warin Kölher

• Born in Mannheim, Germany

• Team Leader, some refer to him as "Mother Hen" because of his protective motherly attitude

• Lost his medical degree early because he kept experiencing near death situations around his workplace, they thought it was becoming too dangerous even though nobody else was affected 💀

• Survived hell and back more than once (literally) before becoming a mercenary

• Happy face pin on his hat expresses his emotions somehow?¿

• Not a demon or anything, trust me!!!!!

• Likes crows, wants one as a pet

• Says he has a rare skin condition (is lying)

Jenny Thomas

• Sees Dr. Kölher as a parental figure

• "IF AUTISM DIDN'T EXIST, GOD WOULD NOT HAVE CREATED ME!" /ref /j

• Actually born in Canada, does not know

• Sent to Michigan (in a box) as a baby and grew up there

• Collector of many things (rocks, sticks, nuts n bolts)

• Can be very trigger happy especially on the battlefield

• Dr. Kölher gives her star stickers when he's good, he sticks them in his helmet (is tryin to collect 50 of them 🇺🇲)

• Owns chewelry because she has a biting problem but easily breaks through all of them in less than a week

Mason

• nickname: mason jar

• If Mundy listened to midwest emo (/hj)

• Look, we don't know how they escaped New Zealand when its currently at the bottom of the ocean but we don't ask

• Laid-back but lazy at times, takes a lot of naps

• Smokes more weed than Spy smoking cigarettes /hj

• Dumpster diver

• Their Jarate skills kinda go crazy

• Games with Junior, they love first-person shooters

Spy (alias: Rune)

• Get half filipino'd loser🇵🇭🇵🇭🇵🇭🇵🇭🇵🇭

• Backup strategist for when things go to shit but also the last resort for a lot of things unfortunately

• Anxiety ridden, visits the doc often

• Good at stabbing, not much with shooting

• Acknowledges Scout as his son but is a very awkward dad. He's trying at least

• A hopeless romantic and has been looking for a partner since the divorce(tm)

• Smokes but is trying to quit, often been seen with a toothpick instead of a cigarette

• Autistic just like me fr, stims with his butterfly knife

Dallas

• Tough cowboy, doesn't play around

• "Watch your piehole son or imma SLAP YOU SILLY."

• Probably the sanest in the team

• Grumpy-pants who needs a break

• Very "tough love" kind of father figure

• "MY TEAMMATES ARE ALL MORONS!!!!" /ref /j

• Homophobic homosexual (/j)

• Despite his name, he might not even be Texan

• Tolerates Dr. Kölher the most

Dymitry (Mitya)

• Here to do his job, nothing more

• Intimidating just like the OG Heavy

• Fond of animals and small creatures

• Actually quite calm, its hard to piss him off

• He has a soft spot for Jenny and Meeka and buys them snacks on the weekends

• Jenny calls him Mitts!

Junior

• Transmasc bastard

• He'll beat your ass (for fun!)

• Good friends with Sniper, they listen to music and play video games together!

• Knows Spy is his dad and is very nonchalant about it, much to Spy's dismay ("I am your fathe-" "Whatever, don't care, didn't ask")

• Has braces paid for by Spy but has to leave base monthly to go to an actual dentist because Dr. Kölher didn't wanna keep seeing him cry whenever he had to get his braces tightened

•Still has buck teeth :3

Meeka

• Your honour, they're just a little guy

• Hangs around Mitya to keep him company, theyre the best of friends!

• Goes on crazy killing sprees with Jenny during matches

• Ongoing beef/goof-off with the RED Team's Pyro

• Pinkie Pie energy!!

• Dallas is their (adoptive) dad!

Angus

• Superstitious about a lot of things but keeps it to himself

• For some reason is always very warm which is why he's shirtless 90% of the time

• Has some amazing tits ngl

• Will wear a dress to the function and be the hottest one there

• His fav food is burber 🍔

• Loves hard rum and scotch (its important to me that all my demo ocs have a fav alcoholic beverage)

------------------------

That's all of them! I hope you like them :3

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 fanart #tf2 oc art #tf2 ocs #tf2 blu team #jay arts things #i love my sillies

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anexperimentallife · 11 months

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Help a disabled, neurodivergent, interracial family get back to the US for medical treatment

After three bouts of COVID and other medical issues over the past six years here in the Philippines, my health has deteriorated to the point at which I'm worried I won't get to watch my little girl grow up unless I can get back to where I can use my Medicare and VA benefits for various surgeries and treatments.

Unfortunately, even with all y'all's help, @thesurestthing and I are still in debt from the two-year ordeal of fixing our daughter's stateless status, so we can't do this on our own. My little sister started a fundraiser for us, and there are a couple of other ways to help, as well. If you can't help, please reblog. Thank you! (The PayPal link takes the lowest fees, but whatever works for you is best!)

If you want more details, they're under the cut:

Six years ago, while still grieving the deaths of my adult sons and a painful breakup, I moved from the US to the Philippines with just what I could carry, in large part because it's actually possible to survive here on the pittance US disability pays. I had kind of given up on life and figured I would sort of drift off eventually. I wasn't going to kick my own bucket, mind you; I just wasn't going to try very hard to keep living. And I figured I'd just pass away someplace beautiful.

Soon after I got here, though, @thesurestthing (also American) started messaging me from the states, told me she was going to come to the Philippines and be my girlfriend (even though I told her no at first), and eventually joined me here. We had a baby under lockdown, and got married.

So now I had something to live for. (And most of y'all know the drama with the error on El's birth certificate that left her stateless and took almost two years and a lot of money to get fixed.)

But I have had health scare after health scare over the past few years, including three bouts of COVID (some of you remember the month I spent hooked up to an oxygen machine), two bouts of pneumonia, a persistent two-year foot infection that took surgery to clear up (and is going to require another surgery to keep cleared up), damage to my heart and scarring in my lungs from long covid, a literal hole in my throat that is growing bigger, a spine injury, joint injuries, osteo and rheumatoid arthritis, a traumatic brain injury that affects my memory and concentration, adhd, bipolar disorder, autism, and other issues.

(Not even getting into the dental stuff--Hope to be able to get that done before we go back, here where it's cheaper, because Medicare doesn't cover that.)

I'm terrified that I won't be alive to watch my little girl grow up unless I can get someplace where I can use my Medicare and VA health benefits.

An old friend of mine is a social worker and on the school board in a small Minnesota city with its own VA clinic, and has offered to help us get settled in there, but we still have to find a place to live (suitable for a couple that includes a physically disabled adult, and who have a toddler), some basic household goods, some cheap used transportation, and need to survive for a couple of months while Zoey looks for work.

Given our situation in general and the fact that right now my disability is our only income, we're probably looking at having to pay at least six months (or possibly an entire year) of rent up front in order to get anyplace to lease to us.

We can't stay with friends because every single stateside friend we have with a spare room also has a cat--and I have an anaphylactic allergic reaction to cats, meaning that I will literally die if I'm around a cat for too long. I've had to go to the ER because I slept in a room that had a blanket in the corner that a cat had momentarily lain on. The only way I can be around cats is if I'm on massive doses of immunosuppressive drugs, which, well... The whole issue here is that I keep getting deathly ill, so suppressing my immune system even more is a non-starter. Oh, and Fel D 1, the protein secreted in cat dander, saliva, and waste, can stay even on hard surface for up to two years, and even longer on porous surfaces.

Again, if we weren't still in so much debt from El's birth certificate debacle, we might be able to do this at least mostly on our own. But as things stand, we can't do it on our own. We need your help.

If you read all of this, thank you very much. And again, if you can't give, please reblog.

For more medical details, check my Rob Gets Medical tag. For more details about Eleanor's birth certificate saga, check my Baby El tag.

#uncle rob gets medical

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zishu-arts · 4 months

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1. What's ur fav avm ep? Or generally ava ep

2. What's ur fav short?

3. And favorite character? Why is that your favorite character?

4. Do u kin anyone? Why?

5. What are your thoughts on King Orange? Personally, I do love the character but I wanna see some controversy. He was forgiven too easily. Do you think that he's affected by immense guilt of his actions? Pls go in detail as much as you wish

6. What are your favorite (hc or not) relationships? Doesn't need to be romantic. Do you have thoughts on relationships between characters that haven't interacted? Or some hc on characters that did (example: I love the hc on Purple and Red hanging out so often that Red goes to visit Purple for advice on PRANKS out of all things)

If I think of something more, I'll send it through!!

1). i dont think i can pick a favorite since there's so many but i love rewatching Lush Caves, Ultimate Minecart Race, The Chef, The Ultimate Weapon (and honestly just the entire KO arc lmfao). For AVA its gotta be The Showdown it's just SOOO GOOD the animation, the concepts, the plot, ahhhh

2). hard once again, but Music Lesson is so goddamn funny

3). THE DARK LORD THE DARK LORD THE DARK LORD (red is my second favorite tho). okay so, honestly it's just the amount of potential and trauma i could give him. i love his character and lore like, the idea of the Mission Code. what does it mean that you've been created for the sole purpose to destroy, and what does it mean that the person you're made to destory become your best friend? like, the existance of that code brings up so much potential and you could literally take it in so many ways. and like, just the story of cho and dark being two people who were coded for a purpose and run away. what...happens to that purpose? what are you supposed to do now? it's very "what am i if not a weapon?" "yourself. isn't that a wonderful person to be?" (i also dont remember where this quote is from). and also, i look at this little bastard and i think ah yes, he is a goddamn maniac. absolutely insane. i can make him as unhinged as possible and i think that's amazing.

i also think it's great that it's so easy for me to just do whatever i want with him like he's some dress up doll. i've got a genderbent version of him. i've got him with ADHD. i've got him with autism. i've got him trans. he's depressd. he has anxiety. he's in love. there's no saving him.

i also like that like. he's dead. he might not be dead. who fucking knows? and he's such an interesting character, is he evil, is he nice, does he care, what does he like? i want to know everything about him and i want to squish him like a little ball

(i alos like that he's very easy to self project into)

4). hmmmm honestly? i only ever kinned like one character (yuki from horimiya) so im not too familiar with actually kinning. if i had to pick, probably red, mostly cause i see him as a hyper possibly ADHD guy who's always running head first into situations without a thought and think damn he's jus tlike me fr

5). KO/MANGO TALK LETS GO !! you're def right, he was forigven too soon, but i like to think or hope that they at least had a bit of bonding. okay well first off i want to start off with: i see a lot of content where we view mango as like around 20 years old which i want to immedately have on the table: what do you mean 20 years old. he's got a goddamn kid that seems to be maybe 8-10, he's got to be at least reaching 40 by the time we actually see him in AVM. and no, 40 is not too old, they can still do backflips and fight ppl (as long as mango maintained a healthy lifestyle with daily exercise, healthy diet, and good sleep).

i love the fact that he went evil because he lost his son, and that he got lost in his anger and started hurting everyone around him. although i do think his and purple's relationship could do with A LOTT of work. their trust was broken over and over again (mostly on purple's end) and im not sure mango particularily remembers how to treat a child well. and did mango ever like,,,yk,,,properly grieve for his son? for all we know, he went home the same day he lost gold, punched his wall a lot, then went straight to working on the staff. now that he doesn't have that drive anymore, i think that's all going to catch up to him. he really needs to properly grieve and mourn and recover before he goes about doing anything else.

he can, in fact however, be a good person/father as long as he's got that under the belt. (which you could def see that he was pretty swag when he still had gold). i personally see him as a raspy and gruff guy so he's also a man of very few words. that also means he probably has a buttload of communcation issues that is gonna affect his relationship with other people. he has got A LOT to work on

i also want to mention how i don't particulary enjoy the "overprotective father that trails their child everywhere". i don't think a lot of people view mano this way either, but i just want it on the table that even though mango would definitely be protective of purple, he won't be weird about it

6). ohhhh okay okay if you've read my fics you know i am in love with the "siblings victim & dark" as well as "siblings chosen and second". i feel like vic and dark are both insane and enable the worst, unhinged parts of each other. and then chosen and second are pretty much polar opposites with "doesn't say a word + yapper"

i also love it when CC treat red as like the youngest hyper sibling bc he really does give off that energy. also I AGREE WITH YOU purple and red together were so cute it was so unexpected but i love that

i also really really really want to see dark and purple interact with each other. mostly because they're probably the two most least likely characters to ever see each other. but i like the idea of dark terrorizing purple and it works because purple the whole time is like 'holy fuck this is that terrorist holy fuck shit oml'

i also want to see purple and mango interact with alan. im not sure if they ever did? but id like to imagine one day alan logs onto his computer and sees these two random sticks on his screen and is like who the fuck are you guys

(my guy desperately needs a VPN)

i ADORE blue + yellow. both in a platonic and romantic sense. they're like skater girl + nerd girl to me. they're so goddamn adorable and i'm very obsessed with seeing them. they hold hands. they're polar opposites. they're always together. they're the duo that if you just see one of them it seems wrong. if one of them is missing, you automatically ask the other one where they are, because they no doubt would know. gods they're so entwined with each other

thanks for the ask !!

#zishu speaks #animator vs animation #ava #animator vs minecraft #avm #i apologize in advance if i clog the fandom tag

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batman-dc-imagines · 5 months

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"I ship you with..."+2004 The Batman!

"'M Chantal, ENTP. I'm a pansexual girl slightly inclined towards liking men. I'm shorter than average for my age, and a huge sweet tooth. I see myself as confident, unconventional, carefree but lazy devil-may-care. As much as I crave social interaction, I struggle to find a common topic to converse with others. With friends I'm open, dramatic, a bit of a rambler and love to prank/scare them. I'm not very fond of physical touch and flinch at contact from even someone as close as my mother. I am really patient and understanding. I hate confrontation, but won't hesitate to rebuke even if my ideas are most likely wrong.I fall on the autism spectrum and have ADHD symptoms; I takes pride in my strange little interests, but have a short attention span and often fail to read the room, as well as struggling with basic etiquette, especially saying sorry. I love making art, and also am a writer. I'm a huge advocate for animal welfare, and find myself especially fond of dogs."

I ship you with...

Joker!

He absofuckinglutely adores you.

He adores everything about you for that matter.

Will rest his arm on top of your head just to get a small rise out of you.

Which may I add he also adores how cute but also sexy you look when angry.

If you show any signs of discomfort or flinch at his touch, he'll respect it.

Sometimes he might forget but will apologize profusely afterword's.

If you don't accept his apology in words, he'll try win back your affections with sweets.

Accept his apology before he starts going more insane please-

I think what really sets off the spark between the both of you is just how polar opposites attract.

While yes you both come off as confident, unconventional, and even a little carefree, you both still even one another out.

If you're ever interacting with the other rogues and you start struggling with communication, he'll gladly step in and take the heat off you so you can get your bearings back.

Same with confrontation.

Your both like good villain, bad villain.

He's the walking definition of, "They asked for no pickles."

Dude loves to gossip with you.

Especially hearing you talk.

The dramatics is a specialty of his so he loves how you gossip and talk to him about things.

Thrilled when you tell him about how much you enjoy playing a few harmless pranks.

Defiantly goes overboard at times when asking you to assist him in a most recent prank he wants to pull on the batman but as long as you have fun and laugh about it, it's worth it in his eyes.

He will listen to your interests when you talk and share them to him.

He's keeping a mental note of everything you say about yourself.

Silly guy loves you more than anything.

Might take him a couple days but once he realizes he loves you, he's telling you almost immediately.

If you happen to slip up during some serious moment or don't read the room, he'll try and make it less embarrassing by adding onto whatever it was you said.

He struggles with basic etiquette as well somedays but I think you too could both work it out before the day is over.

Very supportive of your little hobbies in art and writing.

Probably has attempted once of twice in making you some art work or a love poem.

Key word being attempted.

Don't be surprised if one day he just hands you a random puppy and then walks away without a word.

Don't ask how or where he got the dog.

#joker x reader #joker #the joker #the joker x reader #the joker x gn reader #joker x gn reader #2004 joker #the batman 2004 #2004 joker x reader #x reader #dc x reader #dc #batman rogues #dcu #batman villains #batman rogues x reader #batman villians x reader

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my-autism-adhd-blog · 1 year

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Do you know any good methods of calming oneself down before and/or after a meltdown?

Thank you.

Hi there,

I couldn’t really find much about calming yourself down, most information was for kids or teens, and how parents can help. I did find one source that listed some ways to calm yourself down. It’s quite long, I’ll leave excerpts:

1. Identify triggers.

I have written before about considering emotional regulation as a timeline. Autistic adults are advised to develop strategies to notice where they are on that timeline in order to get a sense of how easily triggered they might be at a particular moment. They should pay attention to their mood, as well as notice how tired or stressed they already are.

2, Get the right support.

No one likes losing control. If our actions have affected someone else, we’re probably going to feel bad about it. However, it’s important for autistic adults to explain to those people close to them what’s happening when a meltdown occurs to ensure they’re supportive and understanding

3. Let go of shame.

The shame that follows a meltdown can be devastating. Another client, Shona, told me, “Getting over the meltdown is worse than actually having it. I feel so ashamed that I’ve ended up crying or yelling in public. I hate that I’m this way.”

Having meltdowns is, for many, part of having autism. Although someone can make an effort to avoid triggers and manage emotional regulation, they should also recognize that it’s not their fault that a relatively slight upset, or simply being in a place where their senses are overloaded, can lead to a meltdown.

4. Deal with the comedown.

Meltdowns are exhausting and troubling. Some people deal with them best by simply being alone. Adults with autism benefit by recognising in advance what makes it easiest for them to recover from a meltdown and having a strategy in place for the next time they have one.

5. Have coping strategies in place.

Sometimes, it's not possible to avoid being in situations that are potentially going to trigger a meltdown. Perhaps someone has to deal with a barrage of emails, or be in a busy city centre, even though they're already feeling burnt out. Instead of continuing to push themselves and hope for the best, it's important to have strategies on hand for coping with sensory overload or emotional overwhelm.

Another client, Sarah, described how she used headphones whenever she was in crowded places. “If I listen to music, I can shut off better from what’s happening around me. It gives me something to focus on.”

Personally, most of my meltdowns come on when I have too much information to deal with. I’ve become very good at telling people that I simply cannot deal with whatever it is they want me to sort out at this current time. I also write lists and flow charts to help me prioritise what needs to be prioritised, so I’m less likely to lose control.

Having a plan in place isn’t going to stop the meltdowns, but it can help mitigate the fallout and help autistic adults, and others, normalise those meltdowns that are a part of their autistic experience.

I hope this helps. Thank you for the inbox. I hope you have a wonderful day/night. ♥️

#inbox #inbox reply #inbox is open

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heisenberg-simp257 · 1 year

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First let me say I love your work!! You write everyone so well and I love it lots. Second off I was wondering if you’d be comfortable doing some hcs for the four lords with an autistic reader? I’m still coming to terms with my diagnosis and what my support needs are, and sometimes I worry that characters wouldn’t like me if they found out I was autistic (even if that sounds silly,,). How do they deal with/interact with the echolalia, the sensory seeking, the meltdowns, the overstimulation, eye contact issues - the whole nine yards?? I’m so sorry if I got carried away I’m really excited to see this !!

I can try! I hope I get this right and you enjoy it!😁💖 I know very little about autism, so thanks for giving some examples to use XD

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The Four Lords with an Autistic S/O Headcanons

Alcina Dimitrescu

-I feel like Alcina would try her very hardest to accommodate your needs but also getting things wrong a lot of the time. She just doesn't understand and hasn't ever been around someone with autism, so she struggles.

-She's probably best when it comes to you avoiding eye contact because it really doesn't affect anything in either of your lives. It makes you uncomfortable, she understands and respects it.

-Alcina has her three daughters comfort you during any meltdown or overstimulation because they have the minds of therapy dogs. She tends to avoid those moments because she doesn't want to lose her temper. You wouldn't deserve that because you can't always help it.

-However, she will always defend your honor and needs.

-If you want something, she will find some way to get it no matter how ridiculous it is. After all, getting what she wants is her specialty. It may be hard for her to deal with some of your symptoms, but she tries to make you comfortable.

-Will get you the biggest stuffed bear if you ask for it.

-And if Heisenberg or anyone dares make fun of you, she will go claws out to protect you and keep you as happy as possible, even if she struggles on how sometimes.

Donna Beneviento (and Angie)

-Donna is probably the most understanding out of the four lords because she herself has behaviors that some consider odd. Sure, she isn't an expert on autism, but she doesn't need to be. She just gets you and flows with whatever happens.

-Nothing really bothers her. She could care less about eye contact because she herself struggles with it. In fact, who knows, Donna herself could be a little bit autistic as well.

-Donna handles any meltdowns you have like a champ. She gets anything you need, comforts you, leaves you alone, whatever you need, and she doesn't get flustered or overwhelmed doing it. Angie might but Donna doesn't.

-But any overstimulation you have is where she shines.

-Too bright? You'll get darkness. Too loud or too quiet? Donna will fix that as well. Her estate is the perfect location to deal with it because she can make it dark and serene in an instance. Or the opposite. There isn't much ever going on at her place.

-And who knows, perhaps her hallucinogenic flower garden might make you feel a bit better.

-The other lords know better than to say anything about you. Because an attack at you is an attack at Donna, and they don't dare take that risk.

Salvatore Moreau

-Right next to Donna when it comes to respecting your condition and loving you regardless of anything. Hell, he wouldn't have any right to be judgmental of anything because he's been bullied more times than he count. Perhaps that's why he wears his heart on his sleeve.

-Like most of the other lords, he knows next to nothing about autism. Sure, he was a doctor, but not in that department. Perhaps that makes him such a good person because he doesn't have any preconceptions about it. Moreau just knows you have some quirks and learns to deal with them.

-To be honest though, while he's not judgmental or adverse to you, it takes him a while to learn and understand. If you have a meltdown, Moreau probably will as well. It's just his reaction or maybe his way of expressing sympathy.

-Unlike the others though, he goes above and beyond to push himself to learn and take good care of you.

-He knows his accommodations aren't rightly suited for your health, so he tries to DIY an area that would make you most comfortable. This is all due to the extensive reading he did.

-Moreau still has that doctor mentality to care for you no matter how much work it would require.

-In the end, he actually becomes the most knowledgeable out of his fellow lords. Moreau is probably the most caring and understanding out of everyone, and you know you are going to be loved and just fine by his side.

Karl Heisenberg

-So, if Moreau is the most caring out of the four lords, Heisenberg has to be the least caring. It's less of a preconceived notion and more of a "I don't have time for this" notion. He knows what autism is, but you require more attention than he can give.

-There has been times when he's raised his voice or yelled over things that you can't control, like a meltdown of some sort. He has to distance himself from you after that because he truly does feel bad, but he doesn't know how to say it.

-Heisenberg has anger issues, we all know this. This is why he distances himself from you while trying to figure out how to care for you at the same time. He really just doesn't know how.

-Sometimes, he wonders if this is the right situation for you to be in. You need care that he just can't give you.

-But overtime, he realizes that he needs to sure as hell try because while you have meltdowns, overstimulation, and struggle to talk to him at some points, there's a part of you that brings positive energy to his life. Call him selfish, but he needs that.

-Maybe that's why he gets angry sometimes. It has nothing to do with you, but rather at the situation. He wants you, but knows you need better.

-Despite all the stress you guys are both under, you know he cares because he gets so protective. He keeps you in the safe serene living space of his factory and will kill the others if they bring up anything about you to him. At the end of the day, he's here for you.

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noblebs · 3 months

Text

oc cuddle scale tag

Rules: Rate your OCs based on how they handle cuddling/being cuddled on a scale of 0-10

tagged by @writernopal and @ink-flavored, thank you both 🖤 this is almost too cute and wholesome a game for me lol

Orion: 7/10. she can be reserved with physical affection, but once she was in the midst of it he'd realize how touch-starved he is. it will take a crowbar to pry him off. he's not shy about bodies so any arrangement of limbs etc is fine, lots of soft clothes+blankets, whatever happens happens ;)

Madrigal: 1/10. she has very complicated feelings about being touched and avoids it as much as possible. she's also very angular/bony lmao.

Devilant: 8/10 when it's cold out. skin might be stone but he's fat and comfy enough. will definitely be awkward and self-conscious about it at first. his internal body temp is very high, so you're basically cuddling a depressed furnace that just wants to feel loved.

Harley: 9/10. big platonic cuddler, they would be so happy to curl up together and watch movies or listen to music. very soft, comfy body, as long as a bit of a smell won't be a problem.

Marrow: 5/10 but not for lack of enthusiasm. they're big and gentle and might have good spots to cuddle, but overall kinda lumpy and there will be bones poking where bones should not be at all. will probably break their skin by accident and leave stains.

Lysander: 3/10. will tolerate cuddling for a while if she likes you, but is too restless to do it for long.

LETS MAKE A CUDDLE PILE OF OCS @fortunatetragedy @coarsely @revenantlore @saturnine-saturneight @autism-purgatory

@ashfordlabs @calicohyde @spideronthesun

#oc orion murphy #oc madrigal baptiste #oc devilant #oc harley fontenot #oc marrow #oc lysander quinn

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chameleonspell · 1 month

Text

HTDC commentary - 3: breathe

[Looking back at HTDC after nearly ten years: comments on lore, character notes, influences, art, whatever. May contain spoilers for later chapters.]

chapter text: 3: breathe

In this bit, I get explicit about some of the stuff implied by Ire's behaviour, last chapter. Which I have mixed feelings about now, because it reads very blunt and tell-not-show and whatever, but... oh, well. At other times I'm maybe not obvious enough with character's internal processes, and the reader should at least understand the terms Ire uses for his own issues. This is all stuff Ire is self-aware about and he's currently reflecting on it, so fine, let's set out Iriel's psychological stall.

only distantly registering the wet ground soaking through his pants.

Wait, no, let's talk about his pants, because alexgaretti dragged me about this later, and I deserve it - why did I convert everything else about the narration into my native British English spellings, but then keep saying "pants" instead of "trousers"? I DON'T KNOW, OKAY, IT JUST FELT WRONG. Pants are how leg-things are labelled in the Morrowind game! Common pants, extravagant pants, it's all pants! People wear pants, that's just how it is. I felt weird enough spelling "bonemould" with a U, leave me alone.

Imprisonment, he knew, was part of it. Of course it had affected him, he had been foolish to expect otherwise. Ridiculous to think he could simply pick up his life where he had left off.

There are obvious reasons why Bethesda games never do anything further with their habitual gambit of starting your character as a prisoner - the player should get to decide who their character is, and how they react! The game isn't going to force you to consider that a character who has been in jail for any length of time (especially delicate, cruelly-framed prisoner characters) may have been wildly traumatised by this experience, and may have difficulty adjusting to being suddenly given their freedom.

Fanfic is the trauma-processing place, though, so naturally we all love having carte blanche to let our characters be really messed up by it.

He offended someone by staring at them? Why? How many seconds were you allowed to look at someone? Wait, not looking at them could be rude too? How could anyone figure out this stuff? If they couldn’t even explain to him how to do it right, why tell him he was doing it wrong?

This chapter is where people started asking me if Iriel has autism. Which I still don't have a concrete answer for! Partly because I'm not sure a fictional character benefits from that kind of word-of-god authorial specificity, when you could just let readers decide, and relate to him however they want to. But also because if Ire's autistic, then probably I'm autistic, and it's not like I'm against the concept, but I really don't know! When I was writing HTDC, I labelled a lot of my behaviours as social anxiety, because they primarily manifested when I was under stress. It blew my mind slightly when someone said to me, "what if it's just that being under stress removes your ability to mask?". I'm still thinking about that one, to be honest, but I'll spare you my non-conclusions, here.

Then he hit adolescence, and it turned out that everything prior had just been the warm-up act for being a queer teenager completely unequipped to conceal this fact from his incomprehending parents and conservative town.

While I'm still vaguely irritated by this chapter, at least we didn't get all this backstory as actual written chapters, right? Gotta start in media res. Gotta skip to the bits that matter for this story.

Also, we don't need to have the boring argument about whether it's more radical/regressive to write fantasy queer utopias, or to recreate systems of oppression in fantasy worlds, right? Of course people can do either, do both, do whatever suits their purpose and is interesting.

I've read some amazing fic* set in Summerset, where homosexuality was an accepted and valued part of society. That approach is totally valid! It just didn't fit what I wanted to do, here, so my headcanons are different.

Based on what I'd inferred about Altmer values (I don't know ESO, don't talk to me about ESO), homophobia as a default in that society does seem very plausible to me. Summerset is a culture where bloodlines (and so heterosexual procreative pairings) are obsessively cultivated. Your blood is who you are, it’s fixed and unalterable, and if you’re acting (or fucking) against the overall societal interest, there must be something wrong with you and your blood.

According to a first-era emissary to the Altmer isles: "Breeding outside the pure line is a terrible, unthinkable crime, and taken as prima facia evidence of the tainted blood of the individual in question- if they were, they wouldn't have the impulse to do it. Exile to the mainland is regarded as equivalent to a death sentence, since there is no purpose in living outside their ideal society."

Now, we have to take this with a heavy pinch of salt. He goes on to write: "They have no real names of their own, only combinations of numbers that, when spoken aloud, sound to human ears as such. They feel no real tenderness for one another and have no concept of compassion." So, as with any TES text: biased source. But I think it's reasonable to assume that the Altmer do care a lot about purity of bloodlines, since this theme reoccurs elsewhere.

* Exhibit A: In Pedo Impedimenta, which is hands-down the best Summerset fic around, and in terms of wildly imaginative headcanons, one of the best TES fics, full stop. It's... a lot. It's unfinished, but you should read it anyway.

He had a plan: the Crystal Tower. Get there, he told himself, and everything will be all right. And then he did… and it wasn’t.

The fic I linked above, In Pedo Impedimenta, is set in the 4th era, and has a scene in which an Imperial tries to make a politely regretful remark about the tragic destruction of the Crystal Tower during the Oblivion Crisis. He is blindsided by how even the slightest mention sucks the air out of the room, sending half the Altmer into tearful, traumatised paroxysms of shock, while others barely restrain themselves from murdering him. The level of social faux pas is off the charts, basically. Altmer grief for the Tower is fathomless, because the Crystal Tower represented the Altmer people, was their heart, soul, ancestral memory, you name it. A symbol of Altmeri perfection.

Iriel revered the Tower from childhood, grew up struggling to prove himself worthy. Getting accepted there was a validation of his entire being, evidence that whatever anyone else thought, he was capable of touching, representing and embodying that perfection. Getting expelled, therefore, was equally personal.

Intellectually, Iriel knows there were petty, down-to-earth reasons for his expulsion, but that sort of symbolism is hard to shake.

Speaking of symbolism, according to ESO, the Crystal Tower looks like this. Yes, I know. I hate it, I had not seen this when I wrote about it, and I honestly refuse to accept it. I wanted it to be a symbol of Iriel's pure desire for knowledge and intellectual advancement, but SOME PEOPLE want to make everything he does into a sex joke. I hate it, and I don't care that it's got a nice safe flared base.

Invisibility potions require diamonds - too expensive to make a habit of. Ire began to practice invisibility cantrips obsessively. [...] Gradually, he discovered that more subtle and specialised effects were possible with illusion, allowing him to adjust his “dosage” according to the situation.

Illusion magic! Already, it's being framed as a sort of drug, with dosages and expensive dependency. Iriel makes this framing himself, and later mutters sarcastically about his addictive personality. But what is he trying to medicate away? Short answer: himself. Physically or mentally can vary. I told people from the start: the title of the fic was never metaphorical.

Depending on the alchemical properties of the bog, corpses could either remain perfectly preserved indefinitely, or decompose to skeletons in mere hours. He suspected that he was not the former.

Iriel has a terrible phobia of skeletons and bones, though I don't think I knew that yet, when I wrote this line. But this is the crux of it: bones are what's left, when everything else has been taken away, all the soft, pretty, fleshy nonsense that buffers our inmost selves from the outside world. Bones have nowhere to hide. And, to Iriel at least, they are fucking horrid.

But Iriel, we could say, what's the alternative? That corpses don't decompose? That dead people stay the same forever, and never really leave? Isn't that differently horrid? I got really obsessed with this theme, later, something Morrowind's burial customs makes easy.

Sinilakki drew Iriel being all translucent in the swamp.

Perhaps I shouldn't have said Iriel had a psychological stall. Stalls don't move, and the entire point of a character-driven narrative is to move a character, right? How are we moving them? On rails, like a train? Self-driven, or carried passenger? That has to change, too, right?

Around half-way through writing HTDC, I made a notes document, trying to clarify to myself what kind of story I was trying to tell. I did it by defining the sort of story I wasn't trying to tell, and I'm just gonna copy-paste it all here, stream-of-consciousness non-capitalisation and all:

not a coming of age story

ire knows who he is (that's kinda the problem), he's an adult now, whatever the fuck that means.

it's about what happens next, how he can fit this adult self of his into the world (can he? does he want to? what kind of world? there are many.) what does it mean to be normal, does he want that? why/why not?

if he fits in, what will that cost him? if he walks away from everything, what will that cost him? what does he value most? could he still change? should he? what would that cost? are these cost estimates of his accurate?? how is even mental accounting???

how mutable is his identity, his self-image, the image he projects? which one is real, are any of them real? is he a trick of the light, reflecting false images with nothing behind it at all? smoke and mirrors.

not a coming out story

ire's out to his family (he's never had much choice about it) and he's past all that terrified self-realisation, first love/lust bit, past the initial horror of it. the worst already happened, in terms of his family and his old life, it's dead and gone, and he survived. and he's bored now. bored and bitter. because it ought to get easier, and it doesn't. "it gets better" got him through his teens. but he's still waiting, and nothing fucking changes, or rather, it got worse. where is his community? is that a thing? and while plenty of this is beyond his control, part of it is internal. Ire maintains, on a logical, rational, principled level, that there's nothing wrong with his sexuality, and that what happened wasn't his fault, that he was badly treated, that he deserves the same right to love and be happy as anyone. HOWEVER. it's not as simple as that. he's been deeply psychologically damaged by homophobia, it has claws in his self esteem that he can't seem to shift. he worries he can't maintain a healthy relationship because of it. worries he can't have a healthy relationship with himself.

not a romance

it's not about iriel falling in love with someone truly, madly, deeply, permanently happy ever after. it's certainly not about a relationship fixing his problems, if anything it gives him more.

it is about relationships, in particular his changing relationship with julan, and the ways it makes him examine himself and how he interacts, and what he wants from another person. What he did wrong in the past, and what he needs to stop blaming himself for. And what his partners need from him, and how he can learn to meet those needs, should he choose to do so. about that negotiation. about failing at it, about screwing things up really badly, on both sides, and where that ends up. about trying to fix things. about what you can/should forgive, what you can't, and what forgiveness means. about recognising when to hold on to someone and when to let go.

what is preventing iriel from building healthy relationships? from feeling, expressing and receiving love? how does this change? what kinds of relationships/people are good for him?

not a tragedy

ire's been through enough shit, and doesn't really believe happiness is likely. this is not about proving him right. it's not about giving him a happy ending on a plate either, his is not a journey of one step, and this story is limited in scope. but it's about managing loss & moving forward.

ok so what is it?

it is about survival and growth. how ire is paralysed by his trauma, and resists change, and the ways he struggles to get past this. to take control of himself & be more than a product of his past & his conditions. to make choices, not be swept along/reacting. to find ways of being in the world and engaging with it.

its about ire's coping mechanisms. what they are, why he has them, how they help him, how some of them damage or restrict him. whether he needs them, or can replace them, reconfigure them, drop them entirely. the things you do to survive are not the things you do to get free. how can ire move from survival to getting free?

it's about surviving, and then about surviving/outgrowing the person you had to become in order to survive.

All aboard, guarfuckers! We've got 197 miles of bad road!

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