#the biggest downside to being his fan

[mzannthropy]

Kindred spirits appear when you least expect them (geddit?).

Normally it wouldn't be a massive deal hating something popular, bc inevitably, everyone's gonna hate something popular at some point in their lives. But what do you do when you hate Me Before You and LOVE Sam Claflin, what do you do then? What do you do, when you see an article about him and get that dreaded feeling in your stomach as you click to open it, bc you know that film will be mentioned? (I want to hug every journalist who doesn't bring it up. Nicely done work, Men's Health.) What do you do when you see all the comments from people who love that film saying how much they cried? (Why? WHY???? What is there to cry about? How easily impressed people are by a cheap tearjerker?) What do you do when that film is sold as the best thing in romance, a True Love (how?), a "doomed love story" (how????? Romeo and Juliet is a doomed love story, not this trash). What do you do when you know there are much, much better, more quality films with Sam to watch, with better developed female characters AND love interests--but everyone ignores them? What do you do?

Will: You're the only thing that makes me wake up in the morning.

Also Will: kills himself.

How truly inspirational! /s

[chahnniesroom]

in sickness and in health

pairing: kim seungmin x female reader

summary: you're the most important thing in seungmin's life, of course his biggest fear would be losing you. it means that taking care of you when you're not feeling well comes naturally.

word count: 2.1k

warnings: a little bit of angst, sickness (fever, feeling nauseous, etc.)

a/n: partially inspired by me being ill at work and my amazing coworkers taking care of me and making sure i didn't faint lol.

till death do us part collection | read it on ao3 | masterlist

Seungmin loves being an idol. 

He loves to sing and performing in front of Stays always thrills him. He loves the other members and really, everyone else that he gets a chance to work with. At times it can be stressful, but for the most part, it’s fairly easy to manage the downsides of being famous.

But when he started dating you, he found out that there are parts of being an idol that he hates.

He always thought that he'd be different from a lot of idols and wouldn't be afraid to show his partner off. The second he met you though, he knew he'd do anything and everything in his power to keep you safe. You understand, of course, and do your part to make sure that only your closest friends and family are aware of who you're dating.

It pains Seungmin to do this, but he knows nothing good can come out of your identity being known.

The two of you are more than careful, sometimes Seungmin feels silly with how cautious he is about meeting up with you. Yet somehow his heart always feels like it will beat out of his chest whenever he sees articles that speculate about idol relationships.

You do your best to stop him from stressing, but it’s something that Seungmin can't quite shake. You're the most important thing in his life, of course his biggest fear would be losing you.

—

The first time his phone rings during a livestream with the whole group, Seungmin brushes it off. The caller ID says it's an unknown number and everyone he knows has been receiving a lot of spam calls and texts lately. 

He swipes away the notification and tries to focus on just reading comments when the same number calls back, a couple minutes later. He ignores it again, but on the third call, he nudges Chan’s knee beside him and subtly tilts his phone screen so that Chan can see. His phone is on silent so nobody watching the live should be able to tell that he's getting the calls, but the timing feels too coincidental for him not to be suspicious. 

"They keep calling," he says under his breath. 

"We'll get someone to look into the number later, just keep ignoring it," Chan advises quietly.

Seungmin takes a quick screenshot of the number, then tries to get back into the conversation to distract himself. The next time he looks down at his phone again, someone is once again calling him.

Seungmin almost reflexively rejects the call, until he realises it's your nickname flashing up on his screen.

You generally don’t call Seungmin without warning, especially not during the day when there’s a higher chance that Seungmin won’t be able to readily answer.

[sent - 3:12 pm]

sorry baby, working right now, can it wait?

His stomach drops when you just call again in response. He doesn’t want to alarm any of the members or the fans when he doesn’t know what’s going on, but he has a bad feeling about this. He once again flashes his phone to Chan briefly and leans in close.

“I want to take this, I don’t know why she’s calling, but something doesn’t seem right.”

Chan bites his lip, obviously torn for a second, before he seems to make up his mind.

“We’ve been live for almost 20 minutes, give me one second and we’ll end it so that you can talk to her, yeah?” Chan puts a hand on Seungmin’s shoulder and squeezes it tightly for a moment before clapping his hands together, effectively ending the conversation that the rest of the members were having.

Seungmin makes himself smile as they all say goodbye, but it's obvious that it's forced.

Even though the live ended as quickly as possible, Seungmin still has 2 new missed calls by the time he’s found himself an empty room to use.

"Hello?"

"Uhm hello, is this Min?" a man asks hesitantly. His voice is unfamiliar and it scares Seungmin. The only thing that brings a little bit of comfort is knowing that you’re careful to never call Seungmin by his full name when talking about him with friends or coworkers, you even have his contact information set as a nickname.

"Who is this?" he asks instead. “Where’s Y/n?”

"My name is Hyunwoo, I work with Y/n-ssi. I’m very sorry for interrupting you, but Y/n-ssi said that you were one of her emergency contacts. We tried to call with another number previously, but weren’t able to reach you."

“Sorry, I generally do not answer calls from unknown numbers. Is Y/n okay?” Seungmin swallows hard, his mouth suddenly dry. “Can I- can I please speak to her?”

“She’s just not feeling well and needs to go home. She’s resting in another room, but I can get her, one moment please.” 

There’s a bit of background noise, the sound of footsteps, murmuring, then finally, your voice.

“Minnie?” you ask, sounding groggy. “I’m sorry for bothering you, I know you were working today.”

“Hey baby, it’s okay. You don't have to worry about me. You know that you’re more important than work to me right? I’m glad you got them to call me. How are you doing?”

“I'm tired. I'm okay, just, I was feeling light-headed and have a headache so I can't work. Hyunwoo said he thinks I have a fever.”

“Okay, I’m going to pick you up and bring you home then. Just continue resting until I get there. I'll see you soon.”

Seungmin doesn’t know what he’d do without the other members. As soon as he finishes explaining the situation to them, they’re already calling a car and working out schedules so that there aren’t any problems.

—

Hyunwoo eyes Seungmin carefully when they first meet, likely due to the face mask and hat he's wearing. When Seungmin removes the mask and shakes Hyunwoo’s hand, he's relieved when he doesn't appear to recognise him. It's not exactly a surprise, men are generally less likely to follow k-pop groups and Seungmin hardly looks like an idol when he's barefaced and in the jeans and t-shirt that he wore for the live.

“Thank you for calling me, Hyunwoo-ssi,” Seungmin says. “Sorry I didn’t pick up at first.”

“It’s okay, Min-ssi. Y/n-ssi mentioned that your work might make you difficult to contact.” Seungmin appreciates that Hyunwoo doesn’t make any attempt to pry further.

“And thank you for taking care of Y/n.”

“It’s not a problem. Y/n-ssi is a pleasure to work with and we all want her to get better as quickly as possible. Come with me, I’ll bring you to her.”

You’re lying in a small meeting room that has all the lights off and blinds drawn. The table and chairs have all been shifted to the side to fit a yoga mat that has been laid out. You squint up at Seungmin from under a mis-match of jackets with your head resting on a pillow that matches the couches that were in the reception area of your office.

“Minnie?” Your voice is soft and a little bit confused.

“Yes, it’s me, Y/n. How’re you feeling?”

Seungmin rushes to your side, crouching on the carpet so that he can cup your cheek. Your skin is flushed and hot to the touch. You reach out a hand and he clasps it tightly with his free hand.

“Mm, I wanna go home.”

“Let’s go home then.”

The company car is still parked outside of your office building, close enough that you insist on walking yourself. Seungmin tries not to hover, but he makes sure to keep his arm looped around your waist so that you don’t stumble. The drive back to your place is fairly short, but when Seungmin glances over you’re looking unwell. Maybe it’s just the dim lighting from the backseat, but you look paler than usual and your eyes are closed.

“You feeling okay?” Seungmin asks, squeezing your hand.

“A bit nauseous,” you murmur.

“We’re almost there, just take a few deep breaths through your nose for me.”

Even though it's only a few minutes before they pull onto the street that you live on, it feels like forever. Seungmmin tries to keep you preoccupied by rubbing circles into your palm. Instead of trying to help you out of the car and into your apartment, Seungmin thanks the company driver and opts to just carry you all the way in. 

He helps to change you out of your work clothes and tucks you into your bed. You link your fingers together and protest when Seungmin attempts to leave your side.

“I promise I'll be back in a second, I just want to get some things to help you feel better, okay?” he says, pressing a kiss to your forehead. You agree, but reluctantly.

Seungmin tries to stay quiet as he rummages around your apartment, gathering some medicine, a thermometer, a glass of water, and some crackers. Next he dampens a face cloth and brings everything to your bedside table, folding up the cloth and laying it across your forehead. 

He supports you in sitting up slightly to take your temperature, brushing his fingers through your hair as you wait for enough time to pass. You lean into his touch slightly, humming in pleasure when Seungmin switches to giving you a light head massage. When the thermometer beeps, it confirms what Hyunwoo suspected, you have a low grade fever.

“You have a bit of a fever,” Seungmin tells you, keeping his voice low. “Do you feel up to having some water and medicine? It'll help you feel better, I think.”

“Okay,” you say, taking the pills that Seungmin hands you and swallowing them with a bit of water.

“Do you want to rest some more now? I want you to stay hydrated so I can make broth for you or get juice.”

“Do you have another schedule? You don't have to stay and take care of me.”

“I don't have to, I want to. And what did I say earlier? Don't worry about me. I'm not missing anything important.”

“So you are missing something,” you insist, your stubbornness making itself known. Seungmin can't help but find it endearing, especially the way that your bottom lip juts out to form a pout.

“Just vocal lessons. I already know how to sing, so it’s fine. Innie had his scheduled for tomorrow, the two of us are going to swap.”

“Oh,” you say, apparently satisfied by that.

“See, nothing to worry about. Now, what did you want? Broth or juice?”

“Broth,” you decide. “But that means you'll have to leave again. I don't want to be alone.”

Seungmin hesitates for a moment before reaching for something resting on the side of your bed.

“You won't be alone, Daengmo will keep you company, okay?”

Seungmin had gifted the stuffed dog to you the first time he had gone abroad after the two of you had started dating, even though it was only to Japan. You had insisted that he keep it at first, knowing how fond he was of the toy, but he had convinced you that it would prevent you from missing him whenever he was away.

“M'kay,” you say sleepily, wrapping your arms around Daengmo.

“You can close your eyes while I'm gone and I'll be back before you know it.”

“I'm not tired,” you say, although even in the dim lighting Seungmin can see that your eyes are starting to droop. “I'm going to stay awake until you come back.”

“Whatever you say,” Seungmin replies.

He leaves your room, closing the door behind him quietly, and heads towards the kitchen.

Seungmin prepares a couple of pots to make you soup. The first he prepares with some ingredients to make a simpler version of a ginseng chicken soup. He knows it'll take a while to cook though, so he adds water, powdered chicken broth, and ginger to the second. Within a few minutes, the clear broth is ready to serve.

Seungmin scoops a portion of it into a mug and slips an ice cube in so that you won't burn your mouth trying to drink it. He makes his way back to your room as quickly as he can, but careful to avoid the liquid sloshing over the sides.

When he eases the door open, he's greeted with the side of you with your eyes closed, clutching Daengmo tightly. Your breaths are deep and even, although you stir slightly when he sets the mug down on your nightstand.

“I'm here now," he reassures you quietly. “You just keep resting.”

“Thank you for taking care of me,” you say in a small voice.

“Of course, I’ll always be here for you.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

till death do us part collection | read it on ao3 | masterlist

[strawberry-cowmilk]

dinner date with the brothers (realistic)

-> brothers x mc

mc's gender is not mentioned, not proof read

content warnings: this is lowkey a shitpost, bad attempts at flirting

a/n: I don't know basic physics so forgive me if not every star can emit light ?? idk also I have no idea if I did something like this before at this point I don't even know what I did and did not already write

-----

Lucifer

your date was probably rescheduled at least 7 times because this man either forgot or arrived way too late the fancy restaurant couldn't give you a table after you missed your reservation (because of work)

hopefully your 30 grimm soup is perfect because he'd get mad at the waiter if the food is 'too cold', he's basically a karen

when he's done eating a meal but you're not he'd just stare at you with no expression on his face and when you're done or notice him he starts a conversation

Mammon

oh he has it all planned out, he's gonna take you to the best restaurant in the devildom and make you madly in love with him

but mammon ends up knocking over a glass of water, falling off of his chair and knocking three waiters down with him like dominoes when trying to flirt with you, it's like he just says your name and chaos unfolds (it's kind of cute)

also mammon wants to pay the bill but he forgot he bought a huge motorcycle the day before so hopefully you brought your card

Leviathan

listen to me, never let this guy plan date night because it will be akuber pizza at 3am in his room (unless you like that I guess) also levi is probably a picky eater so imagine you take him to a fancy place and all he orders is fries

if he likes you enough he will talk about tsl lore the whole time despite mentally swearing not to before the date

sometimes he reads romantic stuff from his phone under the table to you and then proceeds to be embarrassed

Satan

honestly nothing could really go wrong, he arrives on time, he's nice and direct with the waiters, the place has a very nice vibe and his attempts at flirting with you aren't horrible

he's just not the best at starting and keeping conversations alive so maybe there's an awkward silence here and there

the worst thing that could happen is a cat somehow making it into the restaurant and satan climbing over tables to get to it as fast as possible

Asmodeus

he can probably get you into exclusive places, since he's kind of famous

downside to being kind of famous: you might encounter an overly happy fan who isn't rude but just eats your time

asmo doesn't want to be mean and completely ignore his fan but cmon he's literally on a date

he looks at you with the biggest 'help me' eyes so you have to make up some fake emergency so you two can leave

Beelzebub

you know what happens

please book your dinner date 5 weeks in advance and tell them you're bringing beel so the staff can mentally, physically and culinary prepare

but beel is an actual sweetheart to you he lets you eat his curliest curly fries (meanwhile there are waiters crying in the background trying to bring the 100 steaks to your table)

if you tell him you like something he will order 20 more of said dish for you (please give the waiters a huge tip)

Belphegor

he was nervous honestly so he asked to burrow a fancy suit from one of his brothers (even if the date is at akudonald's)

but this man can say the most unhinged stuff with a straight face, followed by a cute compliment

'hey mc you know I wonder if the devildom would notice if I took away the stars one by one until nothing but darkness is left also your eyes look pretty :))'

you know that one song about blinking in morse code to get the waiter's attention? that

[ikigaisvt]

lucky

in which your boyfriend realizes how lucky he is to have you.

pairing: idol!jeonghan x gender neutral!reader words: 1.6k content: fluff, comfort warnings: jeonghan is exhausted/sad and he cries, petnames (for jeonghan: angel, babe, baby, love / for reader: precious), mention of food and eating. note 1.0: omg sammy posting smth?!?? thought we'd never see that again,,, felt like writing fluff lately since i feel there's a Lot of smut for seventeen so here i am feeding my own wishes note 2.0: this idea came after seeing the last inside seventeen where jeonghan looked tired at the end (and it's so unusual of him, to show how tough something is). also felt awful yesterday night, and instead of being comforted by him, i wished to comfort him. minors are allowed to interact but please don't follow. hope everyone likes it, please be nice i haven't wrote anything in month,, reblog/feedbacks are always appreciated!

Jeonghan has always felt lucky to be an idol. Of course, as any job does, it has its downsides – and this one has a lot, despite what he can say. He never once complained about his job, no matter what can happen. Being able to share his love for music to his fans, his brothers by his side is the biggest blessing of his life. That is well known to his family, his fans but mostly you, his partner, who hears him pours his heart out about his job until dawn.

However, there are days when it is harder than usual; days where practice or filming is so hard, he wishes to go home and sleep the worries away; days where he questions if he actually was made for that job. Today, that came in the form of a hard practice. What maybe Jeonghan hasn’t realized yet is how lucky he is to have you, especially at the end of a tough day.

 You haven’t seen your boyfriend a lot lately as he was busier than usual; preparing for his new comeback as well as going overseas to film content. However, as he has been back from Hungary a few days ago, you knew you’d be able to see him again today. You spent hours cleaning your apartment, cooking his favorite meals and stocking up on his favorite drinks, picking shows and music to listen to so you could spend the night talking, catching up together and laughing at the new memories he made. You were looking forward to it, but most importantly, you were looking forward to seeing him again. To feel his presence, to hear his voice and laugh and to be able to touch him. Oh, how much you missed him.

As you finished preparing everything for him, you were lounging on your couch, the TV playing quietly in the background. Looking at the hour on your phone, you realized it was almost 11pm – which meant you were only minutes away from seeing your boyfriend. Getting up from the couch, you went to the kitchen to warm up his meal. You started pulling out different plates – jajagmyeon, tangsuyuk, kimchi pancakes and tteokbokki. "Okay, maybe I made too much this time, but I just want him to eat well," you think out loud. While you were filling smaller plates with side dishes, you heard the door opening, signaling that your boyfriend was finally home. Leaving the food behind, you left the kitchen to find your boyfriend – disheveled, hair picking out in all ways and tiredness showing on his face, struggling to get his shoes off.

“Jeonghan,” you call out to him softly, his head lifting up to find your eyes. And that’s when you realize how tired he really is. His smile is meekly showing up, his hair looks like he ran his hand through it multiple times – which is something he does when he is frustrated, dark circles are showing under his eyes but mostly, his eyes look sad, the usual playful lightness in them gone. “Are you okay?” you ask, your hand reaching out to him to let him know he is not alone.

“I-” he starts, his voice breaking a little bit, before clearing his throat, “I’m okay, I just can’t seem to get my shoes off.” he says, bending once again to work on the shoelaces.

You watch him for only a few seconds before sitting on the little step in your entryway, “Here, let me help you,” you say, gently tapping the floor in front of you, silently telling him to put his feet forward as you chase his fingers away.

“Babe, no-” he starts protesting, his fingers brushing with yours, trying to untie the knot faster.

“Shh,” you say calmly, getting a hold of his fingers, squeezing and letting go to work on the knots again, his feet slightly moving towards you, “You really tightened those well. That’s good, don’t want you falling down on your shoelaces during practice.” You say lightly, trying to make your boyfriend lighten up. You get his first shoe off, placing it gently next to yours, before working on the second one. As you were almost done with the second knot, you feel something wet falling on your hand, and you look up to see Jeonghan looking down at you, eyes filled with tears.

“Hey, hey, hey,” you say, getting a hold of his hand, “You’re okay, it’s fine,” you reassure him, squeezing his fingers tighter as he looks away from you, ears slightly red from the embarrassment of crying in front of you, his girlfriend. That’s such a Jeonghan thing, you tell yourself, “Let me get this one off and then we’ll get you to the couch, okay?” you tell him, earning a little nod as an answer. You get his second shoe off in record time and gently get up from the ground as you reach out for his hand, pulling him behind you as you lead him to the living room.

Reaching the couch, you make him sit down first before sitting down next to him, pulling your linked hands on your lap, your thumb slightly caressing his hand, “Are you okay?” you ask gently, trying to find his eyes but all he does is look down at his lap.

“I’m okay- Sorry about all this, practice was hard and I know you were excited about having a good time but stuffs happened and yeah-” he starts ranting as you listen intently to whatever he has to say, “Ah, sorry again. I’m rambling. I’m okay,” he says again, almost as he tries to convince himself, too, “Really.” He confirms as he meets your eyes, his smile not even reaching his cheeks.

“Love, you may be able to lie to your members but this doesn’t work with me,” you chuckle slightly, “What can I do?”

“I-” he starts, blush creeping on his neck again, his eyes looking around the room, “Will you hold me?” he whispers, hoping you heard him right as he finds your eyes again.

“Of course, angel,” you say as you lean back on the couch, opening your arms for him, his head finding a place to rest on your chest, “Let’s just stay like that for a little while, hm?” you whisper as you start running your fingers through his hair, “You can tell me anything, in case you need to pour it out.”

A few minutes passes by where you can only hear his soft breath – and little sniffles, his body slightly relaxing into yours as if it realizes it’s now finally home. “Practice was so hard today,” he says softly, his arm squeezing your waist a little more, your shirt getting wet with more tears, “That new choreography requires so much attention to details and we need to keep our energy up throughout all of it. I guess I wasn’t prepared to put that much work in it today.” He sighs as you let him know you’re still listening through little hums, “And we’ve just been back from Hungary, my body is still used to that time zone so I have a hard time sleeping. Also, I’ve missed you so I haven’t been able to recharge my batteries at all.” He admits, knowing he would have felt better if he saw you more in the past month.

“I’ve missed you too,” you tell him, leaving a little kiss on the top of his head.

“I’m sorry,” he apologizes again, “For my mood and for ruining tonight.” He says softly, as more tears fall down.

“Baby, angel,” you say, your voice almost breaking to seeing your boyfriend like this, “Please don’t ever be sorry. Your job is not easy, you’re doing so much at all times and you do it well. It’s only normal for you to break down from time to time,” you whisper, running your fingers down his back, “I am so glad you decided to still come to me. It means the world. Please always come to me,” you tell him as he looks up at you, “Anytime you break down, I’ll help you build yourself up stronger, okay? You didn’t ruin anything, you’ll never do so. Your presence is always welcomed, no matter your mood. I love you so much.”

“I love you too, precious.” He says, as he gets up a little to meet your lips. You can taste the sadness – and the saltiness of his tears – on his lips as you take it away from him, take everything bad away from him, lodging it deep in your own body. So it can never hurt him again. You kiss once, you kiss twice, you kiss thrice; you kiss until there is no more sadness within him. You kiss until he can feel how you will always be here for him.

“Feeling better?” you question as you pull away from his lips, brushing hair out of his face and meeting his now shining eyes.

“Very much so,” he chuckles lightly, his forehead resting on yours, “Thank you,” he says, leaving a kiss on your forehead before finding rest on your shoulder.

“Wanna eat now?” you ask, still running your fingers along his back.

“Yes actually,” he says, looking up at you, “I’m so hungry,” he says in a whisper, still making no attempt to move away from you.

 “I made so much, I hope you’ll love it,” you answer him, still not getting up either.

“Let’s just- Let’s just stay like this for a little longer, hm?” he tells you, wrapping his arms around your middle, cuddling even closer – if that’s even possible, “Food can wait.”

Jeonghan truly feels lucky to be an idol – on most days, at least. But if he had to mention one thing, he feels the luckiest about – it’s to be your boyfriend.

aaaaa thank you so much for reading! i forgot how nervewracking it was to post something- please like, reblog, comment and i'll love you forever!!

[jerryterry]

There was one inevitable downside (/upside for Tumblr Drama fans?) to all of these poll tournaments coming to Tumblr, and that's "fandom polls being run by people with a massive bias/opinion that they can't help from plastering all over the posts". Like, there's this one New Vegas poll currently running where the OP has a seething hatred for Cass, among others - badmouthing characters in their poll posts, getting into ranting arguments about it. It's inconsequential and funny, and situations like this are a dime a dozen on this site, but seeing this made me want to take a look at this one a lil closer. Because it brushes into something small I've always found interesting about New Vegas: the rumor of homosexuality in the Legion, as well as a wider factor about the writing of companions in general (Under a read-more for length).

OP literally says "If you tell her you're a gay man, she calls you a nazi", so lets take a look at the line they cite for this:

There's multiple points where characters joke about the Legion having similar prominent homosexuality to the actual Romans (which was notable enough that there's straight-up a "Homosexuality in ancient Rome" Wikipedia page). For example:

- Veronica

- Major Knight

What's interesting is that the one character who talks about his direct experience with this subject, Jimmy (a former Legion slave), actually says something that contradicts that last quote:

This opens up the likely possibility that it's NCR propaganda - a homophobic lie to emasculate the enemy. Even if maybe it IS something common in the Legion, it's something frowned upon and is at best a rampant open secret. Either case makes Major Knight's quote provably false.

Regardless, it's a wide non-Legion belief that homosexuality is common and accepted in the Legion. If the source of that rumor IS cooked-up homophobic propaganda, it's interesting that it hasn't worked on the only characters who talk about it. All three of those quotes not only have no ill will toward the idea (Cass immediately states it's not an issue AND notes how common it is behind closed doors), but two of them are mentioned in a context of longing: Veronica's quote is immediately followed by her being angry that only men are allowed to be gay, wishing the same for lesbians. Major Knight's quote is in the context of him having to hide his homosexuality at work -- which sadly makes it clear that the propaganda was likely more effective in general than on the one straight character who mentions it.

I'd say it's funny that OP has a hatred of Cass for being homophobic despite being one of the few characters in-game who makes an explicit statement of not having a problem with homosexuality (I for one would've loved to see Boone - the biggest NCR bootlicker around - make his stance clear on the matter). But admittedly it IS tactless and clumsy to make a backhanded comparison of gayness to the Legion (that statement's obvious expository purpose aside). They also read "there's a lot more of that in the Mojave" to mean "ew, it's not this bad where I come from!", but Major Knight makes it clear that where she comes from is actually MORE supportive. As well as another comment she makes about having slept with women while drunk, which OP construes as likening homosexuality to a drunken mistake.

Like, relax. Yes, "I have no problem with it" isn't the most heartfelt statement of support. But the most Cass' words betray about her is ignorance. I think it's clear she's well-meaning but ignorant, and for the most part intentionally written that way. Most of the companions have intentional personality flaws - Cass is crass, tactless, and stubborn. Arcade is an idealist to a fault (in the game's opinion). Boone is blinded by loyalty to a flawed system despite enacting the worst parts of it. Veronica talks like every line was written by Joss Whedon. The others' flaws are a little more external, but ALL of the companions are intended to be flawed and have pros and cons (while not entirely equal), and all are still intended to be well-meaning people despite this.

It reflects a realism in the nuance of human beings. In general, the writing often tends to rely on this "no black or white, ALWAYS nuance" approach to an almost frustrating degree - like I WISH you could get a better ending for the Followers in a "did everything right" Yes Man ending, even though I know the phrase "did everything right" itself goes against the core philosophy of NV. The poll thing was intended as more of a jumping-off point to talk about some stuff in New Vegas I find interesting rather than a response to that post, but honestly - I know Tumblr has a bit of a problem with seeing nuance, but have a little faith in the writers, will you?

Oh. They... think the game itself pushes the idea that "all fascists are gay"??? How can you be a fan of this game yet have such a low opinion of its writing? Such a lack of critical understanding? This person says "According to my academically trained eye..." and then goes on a series of reaches that critically misunderstand the text in a really unfavorable way, just because they were (understandably) offended by a clumsy offhand statement a character makes and immediately clarifies. And they chose to run a poll despite their open hatred for some of the characters involved (they also seem to hate Boone, for obviously more understandable reasons). Interesting choice.

What's funnier is that OP's open disdain for this character makes it more likely for Cass to win the poll on account of spite votes. Cass would've absolutely been buried by Arcade and Veronica in any other scenario.

Anyway, here's a YouTube comment I found while grabbing these quotes that I found funny:

[Transcripts of screenshotted quotes are available in the alt text]

[pensat-i-fet]

An unbearable fan (Rúben Dias x Reader)

**So I was requested this the other day and it's kind of funny huh? Me writing from the POV of a Madrid fan. Just in case you didn't know it was fiction, this is the definitive proof 😅 anyways, it’s just banter and a bit of angst and fluff for all of you to hopefully enjoy! ❤️**

Word count: 1238

Masterlist

Wattpad

There were downsides to any relationship and that included a relationship with a football player. All the travelling, all the emotions that went up and down depending on the result of that specific day…it could be a lot. But when the player didn't play for the team you loved with all your heart, things could get a bit messier.

Luckily for you, Rúben played in England. Your team played in the Spanish League. So the chances of him playing against Madrid were so small…but there still was a chance.

And so when Madrid beat Chelsea and City beat Bayern, it was time for a second semifinal in a row between your team and your boyfriend's. And you hated it.

For the first leg, the teams played at the Bernabéu. Being back there was special for you. And it helped you daydream about Rúben playing there in the future…but for the home team. A girl can dream.

The match ended in a draw and Rúben should have been given MOTM because he drove your attacking players insane. They don't call him "the wall" for nothing.

"Just 1-0 at home, and we're in the final".

"Yeah, good luck with that", you said, rolling your eyes. "My boys were just warming up yesterday. They saved all the magic for the Etihad".

"You lot are really into saving the magic for the last minute. It gets annoying, you know?"

"Not to us!", you shrugged.

The banter continued during the next week but what changed was the nerves you felt. Rúben being in the final was great but you couldn't just root against your team. They had already been in a similar position the previous season and it broke your heart. But also, you were happy he lost and that made you feel like a horrible person. You tried not to show it in front of him but he wasn't dumb.

"Are you wearing that?", he asked, pointing at your outfit.

"Yes. What's wrong with it?"

"You always wear my shirt to matches. But I guess you're just making it clear again you want me to lose".

"It's not that but, it's my team…imagine Madrid and Benfica played each other! You'd want Benfica to win and I wouldn't blame you".

"You don't play for any of the teams. That makes the difference. I get you want them to always win but you should make an exception when they play against me!"

"I'd be happy if you win…".

"I doubt it".

You didn't want to say more because it'd only make things harder to fix later. But driving in silence was going to make you go insane.

"Good luck".

"It almost sounded like you meant it".

"Rúben, I do mean it".

"You mean you want me to do well while my team is destroyed. But it's a team sport. What I do means nothing".

"Tell that to Benzema".

He ignored your comment and left to join the rest of the team without saying goodbye.

Why couldn't they draw another team instead of yours???

Rúben wasn't completely wrong. Whatever happened, you wanted him to be the best player on the pitch. It could be someone else who messed up when your team scored.

And he was one of the best…but then again, so was Bernardo who scored a brace. And Julián only needed a few minutes on the pitch to seal their pass to the final. 4-0, how did that happen?

Apart from Rúben doing well, you wanted just a simple 0-1. No team needed to be humiliated this time. But yours was and it was against one of your biggest enemies. Pep.

When you saw Rúben waiting for you by the car, you noticed his smile and that pissed you off. So you couldn't want your team to win but he could laugh after humiliating you? Bit unfair, that.

"You feeling ok after that?"

Your response was to look inside his trousers' pockets, which confused him. "Did you take Karim out already? Nice, he needs the fresh air".

"You're joking?"

"It's that or telling you to go to hell. I'm trying to be diplomatic".

The day after the match, you were off work so sleeping in sounded like the best way to start your day. By the time you woke up, Rúben was long gone and so you made it to the kitchen expecting it to be empty.

And there was no Rúben there but it looks like he had time to buy, and print, all the newspaper articles about the match before leaving to train. He even checked the Barcelona press to find the most insulting headlines.

But two could play that game.

"Did you read the news today?", he asked when he got back home.

"I've never been a newspaper person. I prefer to get my news from Twitter".

"From Madrid fan accounts? I bet they are real objective".

"Are you a comedian now?"

"Come on…", he said, hugging you. "Forgive me for annihilating your team".

"Should we talk about last season, Dias? Stop it!"

"Such a sore loser", he laughed.

"Well, I'm not used to losing unlike others".

                                      **

The weeks that passed between the semifinals and the final had helped you two forget your little fight. But you were still petty and had a surprise saved for Rúben.

"It's so tiring to pack for just a couple of days. I've checked the weather so many times to bring the right clothes".

"You can always use that as an excuse to go shopping there".

"You're right. But…can you help me? I don't know if this outfit is right for the match?"

When he got there, his smile disappeared.

"I can't stand you".

"Is it good or not?"

"When did you buy an Inter shirt?"

"When I saw the newspapers you left for me".

"It was a joke", he said, annoyed.

"This is a joke too".

"A joke is supposed to be funny".

"Really, Rúben? So you thought I would laugh at what you did to me?"

And it was back to square one. But at least this time you travelled separately. And, even if he pissed you off so much since he beat Madrid, you still wore his shirt to the match. You didn't even wear a Madrid one to the semis and he really thought you'd wear an Inter one now? Silly boy.

But all the jokes and digs meant nothing when you saw him lifting the trophy. Your eyes watered immediately and you couldn't wait to hug him.

"You…you won", you said, sobbing and hiding your face in his neck.

"Yeah, sorry about that".

You both laughed and he held you tighter while you cried.

"I'm really proud of you, you know?"

"Even if I beat your team to win the trophies?"

"Yeah", you said, looking up at him. "Even then. Seeing you after you won just…I didn't expect it to mean so much".

"It means a lot to me that it means a lot to you".

You hugged in the middle of the pitch, forgetting about everyone else.

"Besides, you still have a long way to go to catch us so…we like doing charity work and letting others win every once in a while".

Rúben laughed and shook his head. "You are the most unbearable fanbase in the world, you know?"

"I know. But at least you managed to get one of us to be happy you won today".

[darkleysgarden]

Asmodeus Facts!

As a lore person and Asmo lover, I present this.

I am willing to add more as I think of them or as they are suggested (with proof).

13+

1. As most people know: Asmo has canonically given Solomon hickeys before.

2. His favorite animal is a resplendent quetzal. (A bird)

3. Asmo unintentionally was a huge factor in the Trojan War starting.

4. Raphael used to scold Asmo a lot, causing him to dislike Raphael. He doesn't feel this way anymore.

5. He sleeps naked.

6. Asmo's biggest fear is turning ugly and essentially loosing all of his worth.

7. He can smell if people are romantically interested in each other.

8. He has had a face lift before.

9. A lot of fan mail is sent to the RAD suggestion box for him.

10. He is *surprisingly* not very flexible.

11. Has referred to Mc as his 'Bestie'. He and Lucifer have also said that he was madly in love with them. So... why not both?

×

12. *TRIGGER WARNING: EATING DISORDER*

He panics over gaining the slightest amount, down to a kilogram of weight or a millimeter more onto his waist. He also goes on diets and refuses to eat frequently. Satan has also stated that he's seen Asmo sneak snacks in the middle of the night. All of this implies that he struggles with an eating disorder.

×

13. Mammon once found a 'crazy provocative' outfit in his room that was 'FULL of holes!' (Turns out it was one of his favorite outfits chewed up by moths!)

14. In the Celestial Realm he was known as the 'Jewel of the Heavens'. Simeon states that Asmo is still constantly trying to live up to that standard.

15. Y'know how some people can tie a knot in a cherry stem? Well Asmo can tie a butterfly knot!

16. Asmo's dyed his hair pink before and presumably still does on occasions.

17. Asmo is the one who paints all the brother's nails. And this is typically done with a paint brush, not the average nail polish brush.

18. He always puts on a face mask right before he goes to bed.

19. Asmo prefers smooth red bean paste over chunky.

20. He hates being cold and the downsides of winter, like dry skin. Yet, he does love the aesthetic of winter.

21. He doesn't like carrying people as he believes it will cause him to gain muscle. He believes he's more desirable thin.

22. When he first met Solomon, he was in the middle of crying alone at a bar. Solomon came up to him to ask if he was okay. This, and the rest of their conversations that night, eventually led to their current relationship.

23. He enjoys gossiping with Satan.

24. While most demons dislike uses of pacts, Asmo finds them heavily thrilling.

25. He admits to admiring Lucifer the most.

26. Asmo believes that he can always rely on Satan.

27. Asmo enjoys hanging out with Mammon and becomes proud of him for his accomplishments. Though, he likes teasing him because it keeps him on his toes and he believes that Mammon acts the most foolish out of all of them.

28. Demon's have to give their human pact mate something to allow summonings. Asmo gifted Solomon a gigantic oil painting of himself. It was notably his favorite 'selfie' at the time.

29. He is a dog person. He prefers big dogs to little ones.

30. He's never read the student handbook despite being on the student council.

31. Is actually pretty good at juggling a ball with his feet. Good enough to score 5th place out of the 15 characters.

32. Satan has allowed him to copy off of his homework before.

33. His birthday is May 15th, making him a Taurus.

34. He put together Levi's human world outfit.

35. He hates his true demon form, something Mammon often jokes about.

36. Asmo is the weakest brother in terms of strength. He gets worn out incredibly easily. (Maybe because of fact 12 and your refusal to gain muscle or weight. What am I going to do with you, love?)

37. A large amount of his fan base calls him 'daddy'.

38. He frequently teases Levi about having no friends.

39. Really good at rock-papper-scissors.

40. Doesn't really care what happens to him as long as he looks cute during. Even if it's a terrible curse.

41. He is an extremely emotional drunk. He will start sobbing when intoxicated in the slightest.

42. He is not ashamed about his own dirty mind. He even calls out Mammon for having one too.

43. Ass or Tits? Asmo chooses ass.

44. Doodles in textbooks. He even left a kiss mark in Solomon's once when borrowing it.

45. Lucifer practically goes, "Keep the door open" Whenever he catches Solomon, Mc, or anyone else hanging out with Asmo.

46. Isn't good at silly faces. He ends up looking gorgeous instead of silly.

47. Can be horrifying when angry. Beel is more scared of an angry Asmo than an angry Lucifer.

48. Mc is practically the first ever person to like him romantically and not sexually. He has said that no one before Mc has ever complimented his personality before, only his looks.

49. Loves bonding with his brothers even if they're completely opposite of him. He remembers more about Ruri-chan than any of the other brothers (hinted at) just because he actually cares to listen to Levi and bond with him.

50. What part of his body does he wash first when bathing? Well, you'll have to bathe with him to find out~

51. He held his first Asmofest/Asmo gathering 7 days after his birth. These are now held several times a month. He spends time with people he likes, usually drinking. Lucifer is present at most of them.

52. Asmo once wished to have 8 heads. His brother's made him give up on this dream.

53. Asmo requested that Levi write him a novel. This novel was called Space Pajama Party: The Great Beauty War. The hero of the stories name was 'The Hero'. The Hero is based off of MC and the character Atan is based off Levi.

54. According to Asmo, he looks best shot from the left at about a 40 degree angle.

55. It's highly likely that Asmo was the main designer for the guest/Mc's room. Comparing his room to the room, his influence is obvious.

56. He owns an absurd amount of clothes, beauty products, and bathing products.

57. He is terrible at remembering stuff about other people. He even failed a quiz about Solomon, who he considers himself to be insanely close to (This, presumably, does not apply to MC).

58. He works as an influencer on DevilTube and Devilgram. He also does designing. He designs products, clothes, etc. These designs are most notably shown at Majolish but can be seen all around the Devildom. He usually doesn't get paid in grimm for designing, receiving products, and samples instead. He says he prefers that in all honesty (He'd just buy the stuff with grimm anyway).

59. He used to be close to Belphie back in the Celestial Realm. Beel even said that Belphie was practically glued to Asmo's hip.

60. Asmo is the one who came up with the name 'Team Solomon'. Barbatos wasn't a big fan of the name.

61. He was implied to have fucked Santa Claus

62. Even though he is the shortest brother, he often looks taller because he wears heels.

63. Asmodeus knew of Solomon's horrible cooking skills before any of the others. When Solomon tried to serve everybody at the Demon Lord's castle, he purposefully didn't eat any of Solomon's cooking.

64. Asmo is really sensitive about his brother's compliments. One compliment from any of them could bring him to tears easily.

65. During the retreat to the Demon Lord's castle, Asmo becomes heavily affectionate for MC. One of the things he first does is inspect them head to toe, checking their ears, teeth, fingers, etc. This supports him saying that he wishes to know EVERYTHING about MC and potentially any other lover.

66. He doesn't like washing the dishes because it makes his skin rough.

67. To some peoples surprise, he is really good with kids. He even worked with them in the human world. Though, Satan commented that he wouldn't trust his kid with Asmo. He also often makes inappropriate jokes in front of Luke. But, he just shrugs them off and tells Luke that he'll understand when he's older.

68. Asmo enjoys "healing music"

69. (😏) He's a switch. He's quoted to have said, "I'll make you squeal for me!" As well as, "You wanna try some other spots too? Go ahead, I'm all yours." These are two of many lines that help imply this.

70. Despite what many think, he does have standards. He also is not appreciative of randomly being used as an object of beauty or sex. Though he's admitted that he can easily see the good in everyone and finds everyone a little bit attractive in their own way. He also says that he flirts with people so often because his happiness spreads to others and ends up making more people happy. So many people like him, because he likes so many people. Simple as that. But, this doesn't mean he will appreciate just anybody.

71. He didn't have an Asmo gathering for an entire year after the fall. His first one was held with MC as an honorary guest. Solomon couldn't make it.

72. He's implied to like fortune and horoscopes.

73. He doesn't like shopping with 'drab' shopping bags.

74. Asmo tends to photobomb and photo taken around him because he believes he is the most photo-worthy person/thing in the area.

75. He's seen to be unapologetic to any exes he has. He may even flirt with them despite them being annoyed with him.

76. Asmo is seen to heavily miss the Celestial Realm after falling. He repressed most of the feelings for awhile, but they overwhelmed him the first time he saw Simeon and Luke after everything happened.

77. He listed his pronouns on his FabSnap account as Fab/ulous

78. Asmo had trouble calling him and his brothers 'demons' instead of 'angels' for a while after falling.

79. He frequently calls Solomon 'his'.

80. He has a pair of flower earrings that he wears all the time.

81. Asmo, along with his brothers, have all experienced hate for being angels, ex-angels, and demons in different contexts.

82. He has an entire photo album dedicated to photos of himself as an angel.

83. Asmo is not only lustful, but has shown many signs of bloodlust. He even brings up ripping out MC's heart and tearing it open to see if they were telling the truth.

84. He openly admits to being turned on at random.

85. While his brothers fight over bathing order, Asmo likes to go have a nice long bath in his own bathroom just to taunt them.

86. Asmo is pansexual. Good for him.

87. He gets insecure if he doesn't get reassured of MC's love constantly. He texts demanding 'I love yous' and demands compliments.

88. Asmo likes to wear what Mammon calls 'skimpy underwear'.. (And more lingerie!)

89. He very rarely gets more than annoyed. Very rarely even gets annoyed. He isn't seen transforming into his demon form at all during the main story out of anger (And so far from what I've played in Nightbringer). Though, I have seen him transform once in a Devilgram, but he quickly calmed down in seconds.

90. Asmo thinks that drool is unattractive on a man (probably any other gender too, he didn't clarify). He often tells Beel this as a life lesson. (This also presumably does not apply to sex.)

New On May 15th:

91. Solomon has a very hard time saying no to Asmo

92. When giving out gifts, they frequently feature his face. If you're lucky, you may even find yourself with a nice new set of lingerie.

93. Asmo is good at singing, writing, and composing songs. Anywhere from a ballad to hard metal. He even sings live!

94. Solomon once gifted him bath salts made by an incubus. The affect of the charm was SO STRONG that Asmo had to drink an antidote made by Solomon. (It tasted surprisingly good)

95. Asmo is insecure about the fact that he is unable to use his charm ability on MC.

96. In Nightbringer, Satan says that Asmo is the brother he hates the least.

97. Asmo's favorite way to spend his birthday is with people close to him, not with big parties.

98. Asmo really dislikes bugs.

99. Asmo has gathered so many products that he can find something in his collection that works for people with completely different hair and skin from him.

100. He loves flowers, candles, soaps, whatever smell-filled things he can find. (Me who takes allergy medicine on the daily: bro you're gonna murder me the second I step foot in your room.)

[shadamyheadcanons]

I saw a while back you were asked what your favorite interpretations of Shadow and Amy were.

While I don’t disagree (haven’t played heroes so can’t comment there, but have beat SA2) I was curious on your views over Sonic 06 version of Shadow? Ignoring the heavy problems with the game itself, I’m personally a heavy fan of the VA and how he acts.

It may be selfish of me… but I kinda wish Amy got more interactions with Shadow instead of Silver. I get WHY they did it, but I feel like it could of been nice to have them reunite and maybe even contrast the end of SA2 y’know?

First post about my favorite Shadow & Amy portrayals, SA2 and Heroes

Follow-up about Sonic Battle and Sonic Chronicles

I love both Shadow AND Amy in that game!

06 Shadow in particular has been getting a ton of interest in the past few years, and it’s wonderful to see. I considered including it in that first post about my favorites. 06 being such a failure gameplay-wise really screwed things up for the series for a long time. Sega learned all the wrong lessons. No more humans apart from Eggman. No more dark, serious plotlines. One-dimensional characters. No playable characters apart from Sonic in mainline games. None of the others can talk to anyone but Sonic. Obviously there were exceptions to this, but the series lost so much. Sonic 06 is older than most Sonic fans, but we’re only just now getting all of that back with Frontiers, IDW, etc.

This would have been bad enough on its own, but coming off the heels of Sonic 06, it hurt that much more. Sega decided Team Dark weren’t friends directly after their most poignant interactions. Shadow knew who he was. He knew what was important. And he knew he could trust the best friends by his side. When’s the last time he was so self-assured? That’s the downside of the 06 timeline being erased in the end. We know Shadow and Team Dark’s potential, but he doesn’t remember any of it.

That said, I’m ultimately still glad it’s erased. I’d hate for Shadow to go through life knowing the humans would reprogram his own best friend to hunt him down and lock him up forever. It says great things about Shadow, but it makes me like the humans a lot less.

It’s thanks to 06 that I consider Shadow to be the biggest hero in the franchise. This clip encompasses everything that makes his heroism unique:

“If the world chooses to become my enemy...I will fight like I always have.”

Iconic. Badass. I love the way he drops his inhibitors as he talks. This is Jason Griffith’s delivery at its best.

Sonic fights to protect his friends and the planet he calls home, along with the humans and Mobians who all love him, but there are SO MANY people who’ve treated Shadow like filth, and he still protects them. There’s no one else in canon who’s that selfless, and I also like that 06 doesn’t lean on Maria as the reason he does all this. Shadow himself is a good person and does good things for his own reasons, not just because she told him to.

Heroes proved this, too. Shadow didn’t even remember Maria in that game, but he still made the right call. Maria’s important, but she’s not the only reason he’s a good person.

Jason Griffith does a very good job as Shadow here and elsewhere, but David Humphrey is and always will be my favorite Shadow VA. If Jason is an A-rank, David is S-ranked. I’d be thrilled to have either of them back.

You’ll never see me judge anyone for wanting more Shadow/Amy interactions. I’ve thought the same thing with 06, and I love the Silver/Amy bits, too. She has an adorable scene with him AND starts him on the path to redemption. It’s the Amy Rose Special. I also like how she and Shadow inadvertently worked together to turn him around. Amy raised a question Silver hadn’t thought to ask, and Shadow showed him the answer.

But what this demonstrates to me is that this didn’t have to be an either/or situation.

It would’ve been nice for Amy to reunite with Silver and see how he turned things around. They were both there for the final battle, but they didn’t speak to each other. What if they’d had a scene with all three of them together? I hypothesized about that possibility in headcanon #99.

Side note: I just want to say that I think Amy is great in 06. She has the same cute accidental hug/elevator speech combo she used to turn Shadow around in SA2, but people sleep on it in 06 for some reason. On top of that, a lot of fans willfully misinterpret one particular line of hers. And anyone who knows Sonic 06 knows which one that is.

“If I had to choose between the world and Sonic, I would choose Sonic!”

I’ve seen so many people say she’s a dumb, ridiculous fangirl for this, and I can’t stand it. She’s not saying the rest of the world doesn’t matter, she’s saying that she has so much faith in Sonic as a person that she’d take his side even if the rest of the world said he was wrong. And, uh...she has good reason to! It’s not the first time he’s been falsely accused of something. It’s like these fans conveniently forgot what happened in SA2 the second they saw an opportunity to hurl insults at Amy.

You know what Amy’s line reminds me of most?

“Even if you believe everyone in the world will be against you, know that I’ll always remain by your side. Remember that.”

Yeah. That line everyone loves about ultimate loyalty for someone you care about. The line that many consider to be Rouge’s best. The only difference is that Rouge is a calm young adult talking about a friend, while Amy was an upset young girl whose feelings were too big for careful phrasing and restraint. Combine that with how much hate there was for her at the time, and you have a great, dedicated line absolutely drowned in ice-cold, bad faith takes from the fandom. And Silver needed that fervor to make him question Mephiles, too! It had to be her! It was because he saw how strongly she felt about Sonic that he started having second thoughts. You think a calm statement like Rouge’s could have made him back down from attempted murder?

Much like with Shadow in SA2, it had to be Amy. 06 did a great job with her. Some fans still need to wise up about it. They’ve been recognizing how awesome 06 Shadow is, so maybe, just maybe, they’ll do the same for Amy someday.

[be-with-me-so-happily]

To Make A Girl Blush

*header created by @hstylesicons

ONE SHOT

Summary: Harry Styles is performing at the BBC Radio 1 Live Lounge, where y/n works as a studio assistant. She tries to keep her cool while being around her celebrity crush, but he isn't making it easy on her.

A/N: I'm obsessed with his Wet Dreams cover and couldn't get this little story out of my head. Sorry, I'm a major tease...

>> Warnings: 18+ only - Flirting, male self-pleasure

~~~~~

"He's so hot. I don't know how I'm going to keep my cool."

"He's probably used to having that effect on women." You chuckle.

"How are you not freaking out? You're like, the biggest Harry Styles fan I know."

"Oh I'm internally squealing. Trust me. I'm just super aware that he's Harry Styles. Like, the Harry Styles."

"Yeah, Y/N, that's the point. Harry Styles is going to be here!"

Harry is coming to the BBC Radio 1 studio to do a live lounge performance. You and Christine are station assistants, so you get to help him and his band with whatever they may need.

"And I'm just… me. I'm trying really hard not to want to throw myself at him." You laugh.

"I can feel the sweat coming already." Christine jokes. You both fan yourselves.

"Geez, look at us, how old are we?"

"Fourteen." Christine giggles. "I think today we are going back to being fourteen year old fangirls."

"Oh god, please, no."

~~~~~

The morning was full of prep work, which involved lots of running around. You and Christine will basically be at their beck and call, which definitely isn't a downside to your job today.

Your boss instructs you to meet the singer as soon as he arrives to his dressing room, to immediately check if he is in need of anything.

You knock on the door with his name boldly printed on a taped up piece of paper.

"Come in."

"Hi, Mr. Styles. I'm Y/N. I'm an assistant here, so if you or your crew need anything, just let me know."

"Alright." You see him try to subtly look you up and down.

Don't activate your inner fangirl in front of him

"Umm... a bottle of room temperature water would be nice, actually."

You are slightly confused. "Room temperature?"

He nods. "It's actually better for your vocal chords than cold or hot water." He strokes down his gorgeous neck, as if to demonstrate how the water flows down his throat.

"Okay, I'll go grab that now. Anything else before I go, Mr. Styles?"

"Umm… yeah, please just call me Harry." He grins widely, showing off those deep dimples that everyone is obsessed with.

"Sure. I'll be right back with that water... Harry." You nod and notice a small smirk on his face before you turn around and exit the room.

Once out the door, a loud exhale leaves your lips, as if you hadn't taken an actual breath that entire interaction.

Christine shuffles up to you. "Oh man! I'm so jealous! What's he like?"

You roll your eyes. "I don't know. Like every other famous singer that comes in here…"

"Really?" She asks, looking a little disappointed.

"No, are you kidding? He's beautiful! But we didn't really talk much so I don't have much to tell you."

She puts her hands on her hips and frowns.

"Y/N, I don't think you're appreciating this enough. You were in the same room as Harry Styles!" She scolds, still with a smile on her face.

You definitely appreciate the sight of him

"Geez, do you want to take his room temperature water to him?" You offer.

She grins and nods her head. You hand her the water and head off to see if anyone in the band needs something.

You find them all in one of the bigger rooms, sitting around on couches, doing some vocal warmups.

"Hi there! Sounds great." You chuckle. "I'm Y/N, an assistant here. Do any of you need anything? I'm happy to help! And don't be shy about asking."

You bring them some water as well, and chat with them for a few minutes before you head back out to hunt for Christine.

You find her, beaming with joy, as she rushes over to you and grabs your shoulders.

"Thank you for that Y/N! He is so nice, and so sexy. He let me take a selfie with him and everything!" She squeals.

"How old are you again?" You joke.

"I'm fourteen. Apparently today I'm fourteen." She jokes back, skipping off to do whatever is next on her list.

You decide to do the rounds again, and check in on Harry.

"Hi, uh, Harry. Just wanted to check back in with you."

He quickly turns around, apparently caught guard, and that's when you realize he is wearing a pair of flared blue pants... and nothing else.

That's just plain rude

"I'm sorry, I'll come back." You cover your eyes, and then turn around to walk out.

"Y/N!" He laughs. "S'alright. I could use your help. You mind?"

"Oh! Um, no, not at all."

"I just accidentally knocked two of my rings off the table, and I can't see 'em anywhere." He states, searching the ground with his eyes. "I'm going to sound like a diva, but I just put my pants on and I don't want to wrinkle them."

Well, just take them off… oh god, just stop

"Okay. Where should I look?"

He has one hand on his hip, and the other one up to his lip, still looking at the ground. He points under the table. "Maybe there?"

You get down on your hands and knees to look, and quickly find them laying near where he had pointed. As you stand and stretch out your hand to give them back, he slides his body closer to you so you are only about one foot apart from each other. You think you see him start to bite his lower lip before correcting himself, and his hand is lingering on yours a little longer than would be normal as he takes his rings back.

"Thank you so much." He utters, winking when you meet his gaze.

What a flirt, but who could resist those gorgeous eyes? And that toned, tattooed chest…

You clear your throat, as you snap your eyes up from his chest. Your cheeks get red with embarrassment, and you are really hoping he can't see that.

He smirks slightly. You feel yourself getting more flustered, so you finally take a step back.

"So, uh, I'll head out, unless you need anything else?"

He smirks again, and this time you know for sure that he looks you up and down.

"Not unless you want to help me finish getting dressed…" He chuckles.

How many girls would say yes? All of them

You chuckle and walk out the door, commenting before you're out of view. "I'll be somewhere out here if you need me."

He flirts with everyone right? Not a womanizer, but a big flirt… right?

~~~~~

Everyone is set up in the studio and ready to go. You and Christine go around to each band member, checking in one more time with everyone before they start. Christine, of course, checks in with Harry. He smiles politely and shakes his head, assuring her that he doesn't need anything. He looks at you and smiles when you fully meet his gaze. You smile back and look down, trying not to blush again.

Calm down, he's been with super models, he's just being a big flirt, or at least you want him to be

You and Christine get off the set and stand right across from Harry.

The introduction plays and the band starts the opening chords for 'As It Was'. You are watching Harry Styles play his new songs right in front of you and your skin is itching with excitement.

You sing along. The song is so catchy, how could you not? He dances around a little and you find yourself matching his movements.

Thank god his eyes are closed, or you'd be completely embarrassed

The song ends and you subtly make sure everyone has what they need.

'Late Night Talking' is the next song and once again you find yourself unable to hold back from dancing. This time Harry does open his eyes a bit more, especially during the second chorus, and he dances more after looking at you.

He's a performer, has nothing to do with you

The more he sings, the more flustered you feel. The more he looks at you and smirks, the more heated you get.

Might need a cold shower later

Once again, you double check that everyone is comfortable, as Harry talks to the radio dj.

They change it up and start to play 'Boyfriends'. The mood turns emotional. You've definitely had your share of bad breakups, and you realize there's a couple tears trickling down your cheek. Just as you wipe them away he quickly glances in your direction, and you turn your head away.

The song finishes and he motions to you for some water. Luckily, you brought a few bottles with you and place one down by his mic.

"You alright, love?" He whispers.

You look up at him, a little surprised he noticed your reaction to the song, and that he cares.

"It's a really good song." You quickly reply. He smiles as you stand back up to meet his gaze. You're a couple feet away and unintentionally look at his lips, down to his neck, admiring his upper body in his tight T-shirt, and making your way down to view the flared blue pants you saw earlier.

Your eyes shoot back up as you realize that you literally just checked out Harry Styles right in front of him. You feel like you could just die of embarrassment right then and there.

He giggles under his breath and you clear your throat to ask, "need anything else?" He shakes his head, smiling widely and showing off those deep dimples.

You feel sensation between your legs and you quickly head back to the spot you were standing, opening a bottle of water for yourself and gulping about half of it down.

The DJ announces that he will be covering a song by Wet Leg called 'Wet Dream'. You almost squeal, knowing and loving this song too.

Ironic song considering what you're feeling at the moment.

This time, you don't care if Harry sees you dancing around, and he definitely does.

is no one else around you

He opens his eyes to see you and starts moving around, touching his body and putting his hands up.

If only he knew what was going on in your head right now…

You continue to sing the lyrics and dance around. He squints his eyes open again, singing the next line.

baby, do you want to come home with me

You gulp down some more water.

You almost lose it completely when he starts the second verse and seems really into singing the next line of the song.

what makes you think you're good enough to think about me when you're touching yourself…

Well, you don't feel you are good enough, but you are definitely heating up enough to want to.

Absolutely going to take a cold shower later

The heat is just rising in your body as he sings about blushing. He ever so slightly moans with the lyrics and bounces up and down as he sings about it being enough.

You're getting so uneasy at this point that you think you may have to leave the room. Thankfully the song ends shortly after, but not before you see him look straight at you while singing the last two words.

let's begin

As soon as it all ends, Harry thanks everyone and actually excuses himself quickly. You're a little relieved, being able to calm yourself down and breathe now that he's out of the room. You check in with the band to see what they need. You help them tidy up a little and carry some of their stuff to the big room they had been in.

You decide to check on Harry too and make your way to his dressing room. As you get to the door, you grab the handle and you hear him say your name, so you open the door.

"Oh my god! I'm so, so sorry!" You exclaim, covering your eyes from the sight of him sitting in the chair, pants unzipped, pumping his hand up and down his length.

"Shit!" He blurts out, covering himself up with a pillow, then proceeds to laugh. "Thought I locked the door."

"I should've knocked. I'm so embarrassed!" You state.

"You're the embarrassed one? I was saying your name while touching myself, and you just saw it."

"Wait, what??" You ask, jaw dropping in disbelief.

"M'sorry." He smirks as he bites his lower lip. He is squirming under that pillow, probably still aroused and needing some relief. "I just couldn't stop watching you dancing to the Wet Leg song, and, well…" he looks down at the pillow covering himself.

"I… uh…" you stutter.

"Could you shut the door, love?" He begs.

You do, locking it and keeping yourself in the room. He laughs.

"So you want to stay?"

You blink a few times, realizing that he was probably asking you to leave.

"I'm sorry." You frown, feeling so stupid.

"S'alright." He smirks, yet again. "Could… umm… could use some help here…"

"I'm pretty sure there's twenty hot girls around here that you could call on." You blurt out.

"Maybe, but…" He frowns. "I'm in this predicament because of you…"

You lick your lips and then bite your bottom one.

What do you do? What do you do?... Go for it!

Confidence surprisingly kicks in, so you walk over to where he is sitting and kneel down.

"Well, it is my job to get you anything you need." You giggle.

"Yes, please, I definitely need this."

~~~~~

Taglist: @watermelonsugacry @tw1nflamebruis3 @slut4lilyrose @pinktakeaway @hopefulwastelandcreation @tenaciousperfectionunknown @his-only-angel-1989 @queenmadi2 @runway-to-my-aid @theekyliepage @be-yourss

~~~~~

You can send some extra support here if you feel inclined -Bee xx

[obitohno]

stay

fushiguro toji x reader

synopsis ⤸

you know that loving toji is forbidden, but you just can’t help yourself.

themes ⤸

fem! reader, 18+, student-teacher relationship, age gap, angst, forbidden relationship, unrequited love, love confessions, make up sex, creampies, spooning, cowgirl, missionary, reader is twenty-three, toji is in his early forties, professor fushiguro

word count ⤸

7.1k (semi-edited)

a/n ⤸

i have to confess that i’m not the biggest fan of jjk, but i like the characters, n atm, i have major toji brain rot, it’s literally taking over my mind. i think that the forbidden love suits him, so this is the result of me not being able to stop thinking about ‘professor fushiguro’, hhh. this is my first jjk au, so i hope that you enjoy it :)

reblogs are appreciated ~

it’s long past nightfall, and morally, you know that you’re not supposed to be sneaking around the university campus in the middle of the night, but alas, here you are, skirt riding up the length of your thighs as you hoist yourself up and over the iron-welded gate that is supposed to keep you locked out of the building that you’re currently aiming for. you land on the other side of the gate with a soft grunt, hands breaking your fall onto the tarmac, barely avoiding scraping your knees in the process. rushing your way over to the side door of the age-old building of the staff quarters is harder work as you have to duck behind the bike shed, and weave under a particularly leafy shrub-like tree, to avoid alerting the security camera that glares red from the upper wall.

once you reach the door, you make quick work of picking the lock with a hairpin, the corners of your mouth tugging into a small smile when you hear the tell-tale click that announces your success. the door swings shut behind you, and once you stand inside the main hallway, the thrill of potentially being caught makes your pulse race so harshly that you actually feel your neck throb with each beat. you swallow down the anxiety that belatedly rears it’s ugly head, and you quietly make the short journey to your destination. 

professor fushiguro’s quarters are, luckily for you, the only ones that are located on the ground floor. it not only makes your mission easier to achieve, but it also lessens the unlikely chance of other members of staff loitering nearby when their quarters are on the upper floors. the only downside is that the kitchens and lounging areas are also located on the ground floor, but you’ve made this trek countless of times, and so far, you’re yet to encounter anyone other than the very man that you’re here to visit. 

all too soon, your fist is raising to gently tap the wooden frame that you’re well accustomed to, once, twice, thrice, before your hand limply falls to your side. although quiet, the sound of your knock masks any noise that may come from inside, and you fail to hear the soft laughter coming from somewhere behind the door. when there’s no immediate answer, you frown, and your hand raises to repeat the action, only to freeze when the door is suddenly yanked open to reveal a familiar shot of dark hair and a pair of forest coloured eyes that stare down at you, rounded with bewilderment. 

he blocks the doorway, obnoxiously tall frame towering above you, and his expression is anything but welcoming. ‘what are you doin’ here?’ he hisses down at you, dark brows pinching together. 

‘uh, it’s wednesday?’ you remind him, taken aback by his odd behaviour. ‘we always—’

‘you didn’t get my text?’ he interrupts you, glancing over his shoulder. at this exact second, you hear something, or rather, someone, moving around in the apartment behind him, and your eyes widen upon realising that he’s not alone. his head whips back toward you, and he whispers furiously, ‘you can’t be here.’ he then tries to pull the door shut behind him, but it’s too late. 

‘toji? darling?’ 

it’s a woman’s voice, you recognise, stomach twisting with nausea when you catch the brief look of embarrassment that passes over toji’s features. understanding the situation, you back away from the doorway—away from him—and you thickly swallow the lump that has formed at the back of your throat. 

he has the audacity to whisper your name, but when his hand reaches for you, you flinch out of reach. ‘it’s not what it looks—’ 

you don’t stick around to listen to the rest of his lie. 

you’re already halfway down the hall when you hear him mumbling behind you, ‘—s’just a student askin’ ‘bout test papers.’ 

‘this late?’ the woman’s voice questions. 

‘she’s… dedicated,’ comes toji’s delayed reply, and you listen to his lady friend laughing as if the prospect of a student dedicated to their studies is somehow particularly amusing to her. her soft titter is cut short by the door slamming shut behind them. 

it isn’t until you’ve made your way out of the building and jumped back over the gate that it hits you properly. 

jujutsu academy is home to a student body of exactly fifteen thousand, two hundred and fifty-seven students, with majority of those students living in halls because the location is quite literally the middle of bloody nowhere as itadori yuuji had described it on the very first day that you’d met him. he’d helped you when you’d gotten lost in the library, and at first, you’d assumed that he was a fellow student, only to be taken by surprise when he’d revealed that he’s actually a member of the coaching staff in the sports department. it had turned out that the two of you are actually around the same age—give or take a few months here and there—and the two of you had bonded quickly. you told him that you were majoring in english literature, and that’s when he revealed, with a scowl plastered between his brows, that the head tutor of the english department is actually his best friend’s dad. yuuji’s depiction of professor fushiguro didn’t paint the man in a very good light, so when you attended your very first lecture, you’d been nervous about meeting the ugly old man with a constant stick up his ass. 

only, professor fushiguro was neither old or ugly, and he definitely didn’t walk around like he had a stick up his ass. in fact, you had been pleasantly surprised when you’d met a very fairly attractive man who had barely breached his forties, and the moment he’d smirked down at you, you instantly knew that you would be in for a world of trouble. 

because campus is a good three hour’s drive from the rest of civilisation, most of the staff also reside here during term time. and among them, there are one or two members that stay behind during the holidays when everyone has gone back home. and professor fushiguro is one of them, you’d discovered after quite literally bumping into him after exiting the library after a study session during the easter break. he’d seemed surprised to realise that you’d also chosen to stay on campus instead of returning home, and it had been evident that he was curious as to why, but he’d allowed you your privacy, as you had him. 

after that, he’d offered extra study lessons, but after just a few months, you realised that fuck, you liked him. at first, you’d passed it off as a simple crush on a man whom you clearly respected as your senior. but, that admiration had quickly burned into something more, and soon, he was all you thought about. one night, after consuming alcohol stolen from the kitchens in your classmate’s dorm, you had most definitely been drunk when you had eventually stumbled your way back to your own dorm. 

it is for this reason that when you’d passed by professor fushiguro in the hallway, you’d been filled with a false sense of confidence and had boldly pushed him against the wall and crushed your mouth to his. 

this confidence had faltered when he’d stood frozen for a few seconds too long. but when you’d moved your lips away from his, he’d chased after you, and had proceeded to kiss you until your knees were weak. 

that was two years ago. 

despite having recently celebrated your twenty-third birthday, you know that whilst he maintains the position of your tutor, your bond with toji isn’t one that can be shared in pubic, and so, the comfort of his quarters has become a private space that the two of you have made your haven, together, hidden from the eyes of everyone around you. and at some point during the last two years, your admiration for him has morphed into a love that is forbidden by both society and of the subject of your affections, himself. when you’d first started sleeping together, he’d made it perfectly clear that that was as far as things would ever go. you had both agreed to go exclusive, but there would be no relationship, and there would certainly be no feelings involved. you’ve clearly broken that promise, but as long as he never found out, then you thought that you’d be okay with any semblance of affection that he showed you. 

however, you’d failed to think of the possibility that he’d eventually find someone. someone that he doesn’t have to hide his relationship with—someone he genuinely loved. 

maybe it’s because you know that he is it for you, but the notion of him wanting someone else just hadn’t occurred to you. although he’d never voiced anything aloud, you had thought that you’d meant something to him. 

the realisation that you’ve been wrong this entire time makes you feel sick. you’re unable to stop the first tear that slides down the curve of your cheek, and it is quickly followed by many others. you choke on a sob that threatens to escape out of your mouth, and instead, you gnaw your teeth into your bottom lip and quicken your pace as the bottoms of your shoes scuff the ground with each footstep. the journey back to your dorm is a blur, mainly because of the tears that won’t stop pissing down your face, but you somehow manage to lock the door shut behind you, kick off your shoes and make your way to your bedroom, collapsing to the bed just as the first gut-wrenching wail heaves out from the pit of your stomach. you’re unsure of how much time passes as you lay there crying, but at some point, you must fall asleep because when your eyes open next, your throat is sore and there are dry track-marks that have crusted to the surface of your cheeks. a squint toward your bedside table shows that the digital clock now reads 03:51 and you exhale a long breath from your nostrils. 

your fingers blindly reach for your mobile phone and a quick glance at the screen shows that he had, in fact, messaged you, warning you that he had plans tonight. 

plans. 

enraged—at him or yourself, you haven’t decided yet—you scoff, and without reading the new message that he sent just an hour or so ago, your thumb and index finger press to power off the device. it lands with a clunky thud when you drop it onto the bedside table. you roll over, eyelids closing, and with this, you attempt to sleep. 

๑ 

three days later, and you’re yet to leave your dorm. you spend majority of these three days laying horizontal apart from when you have to use the bathroom. you’ve barely slept, you’ve not eaten either, and you’ve also missed several lectures, so you know that it’s only a matter of time before someone (yuuji) comes looking for you. it’s only with the guilt of potentially worrying the pinkette that you are convinced to finally venture from your dorm on the fourth day. 

you have an english lecture in less than an hour, but you figure that you should have enough time to find something to fill your empty stomach for the first time in ninety-six hours. you’re just about to enter the campus cafe when a loud, boisterous voice bellows your name and you turn just in time to see yuuji making a beeline for you just before his arms curl tight around your shoulders, squeezing. he collides with you so suddenly that it makes you dizzy, and aided by the fact that you’ve not eaten for days, you suffer a sickening bout of visual static. to your embarrassment—and yuuji’s horror—you sway, and your fingers clutch at his hoodie in an attempt to keep yourself upright. 

‘oh my god,’ yuuji exclaims, spluttering an apology as he guides you to sit on a nearby wall. he crouches before you, his hands enveloping yours, blurting several questions, one after the other, ‘where have you been? why didn’t you call me back? i’ve been calling you for days. are you sick? you look sick. can i do anything to—?’ 

‘food,’ you blurt, eyes squeezed shut in an attempt to ease the ache that’s settling deep into your temples. ‘please.’

‘i’ll be straight back,’ he promises, and with a little hesitation, he leaves your side. blowing a puff of air from between your lips, you don’t have to wait long for yuuji to return to your side. he sits next to you, shoving a cinnamon bun and a bottle of coke under your nose. ‘you need sugar,’ he explains when you raise an eyebrow at his choice. he (im)patiently waits for you to devour the cinnamon bun and half of the bottle of coke before he says, ‘no offence, but you look…’ he grimaces, evidently unsure of how to finish his sentence without offending you. 

you don’t have to look into a mirror to know that bags have formed under your eyes, your hair disheveled because you didn’t bother combing it before you left out this morning, and your clothes are crumpled because you’d picked out the first outfit you’d found in the pile dumped on the floor by the foot of your bed. 

you know that you look like shit.

‘sorry,’ you mumble. ‘i’ve not been sleeping well.’ 

or, at all. 

yuuji is frowning, ‘has something—?’ 

you’re not ready for this conversation. mostly because you honestly don’t know how to explain that you’ve been having an affair with your professor for the past two years, nor admit out loud that you’re in love with said professor, or accept that you’ve spent the last three days wallowing in your own misery because said professor sees you as nothing more than a body to warm his bed. 

your frown deepens, ‘i really don’t want to talk about it… please. i-i’ll be fine, i’m just… i’m tired.’ 

he relents, but you can see that he wishes to argue otherwise. the fact that he doesn’t fills you with gratitude that you show by leaning to bump the side of your head against his shoulder. he leans into your weight, sighing. the minutes tick by, and eventually, you decide it’s time to make your way over to your morning lecture, despite how much you wish to go back to your dorm and sleep. yuuji offers to accompany you to the lecture hall, and with each step, your stomach anxiously twists with nerves. luckily, when you arrive, there are already people inside, and so you wave your goodbyes to your pink haired friend and quietly enter the hall. 

heart in your mouth, you pointedly refuse to look toward the desk at the front of the hall, where, from the corner of your eye, you see him sitting there, busying himself with fiddling with the projector. with his back to the room, he doesn’t seem to notice you, and instead of taking your normal seat at the front, you hide yourself at the back of the hall, sinking low in your seat in a bid to make yourself look smaller. 

it seems to work, the task made easier when the hall starts to fill with more people as the clock ticks closer to nine am. through heavily lidded eyes, you’re mindlessly following the scribble of your biro dragging across your notebook, so immersed in your drawing that you flinch when a calloused hand slaps this morning’s lecture notes onto your desk. your pen stills, and as quickly as the hand appeared, it leaves again, already moving on to hand out the rest of the sheets to his other students. only when he’s finished his task and starting the lecture, do you dare to look up from the note that is scrawled in the corner of your handout. 

he looks as rough as you feel. 

there’s a faint shadow tracing the sharp edges of his jaw from where a stubble is beginning to grow, the strands of his hair even messier than usual, and his skin is pale when illuminated by the beam of the projector. he doesn’t seem to have slept much either, the skin under his eyes appearing darker than usual. you stare, your chest heavy with the hope that maybe he’s just as affected by your separation as you have been. but that hope is quickly smothered by the ugly feeling of doubt, and your eyes reluctantly drag from his face, dropping back to the familiar haphazard scrawl of his handwriting. 

see me after class. 

๑ 

you do not see him after class. 

as soon as the bell tolls, you can’t hightail it out of there fast enough, merging with the crowd of your fellow classmates as you rush out of the room. but, because of your increasingly bad luck, you end up loitering at the back of the group as the lack of energy has you slowing your pace in an effort to not overexert yourself. they easily overtake you, some of them glancing at your unkempt state, and you’re left to wander down the hall by yourself. 

only, you don’t make it very far. 

just as you’re about to turn the corner, a warm, large hand wraps around your wrist and yanks. startled, your shriek is muffled by another hand slapping over your mouth, and then you’re dragged backwards, through an open door that leads to what looks like a storage cupboard. the door is kicked shut, and then you’re spun around, your back pressed against it by the hand on your shoulder. 

toji towers above you, arms caging you in with no room to escape. you have no choice but to peer up at that beautiful face of his, the corners of your mouth pulling downward when your eyes meet his. 

‘i called,’ he says, tone dry. 

you force what you hope to be a neutral expression, shrugging one shoulder. 

‘and?’ 

he doesn’t speak in favour of staring down at you, his jaw clenching. 

it hurts to look at him, you decide, and you tear your eyes from his face to glance at the unnecessary pile of brooms that are stacked in one corner of the very small room. he’s standing so close that you can feel his breath fanning across the side of your face, the sensation one that you’re familiar with. the corners of your eyes sting, and after a few moments of tense silence, your hand blindly searches for the door handle behind you. 

‘well, if that’s all—’

you pull on the handle, and the door inches open by a few centimetres, before his palm slaps down onto the wood, slamming it shut again. the noise makes you jump, eyes wide as your head turns to meet his glare. 

‘’s’that it, then?’ he hisses down at you, neck bending to lean closer. ‘you just gonna keep runnin’ from me?’ 

‘i’ve got class,’ you deadpan, head thumping back against the door. as if to prove your point, the next bell tolls, signalling the start of the next hour.  

‘don’t give a shit,’ he spits, eyes narrowed down at you. 

‘well i do,’ you retort, yanking on the handle so harshly that he has no choice but to step back when you elbow him out of your way. his hand grabs at your bicep, but the back of your hand slaps him away, irritation making your cheeks burn. ‘don’t touch me.’ 

he retracts his hand, but he’s staring down at you, hard. then, his façade crumbles, and you baulk when his expression falls, fingers shaking as he drags them through his messy hair. 

‘look,’ he says, voice thick with exhaustion as he looks down at you with as equally tired eyes. ‘just… come over? today?’ 

‘it’s not wednesday,’ you remind him. 

he frowns down at you, ‘i know.’ 

‘it’s monday,’ you reiterate, looking at him pointedly. 

‘i know,’ he stresses, uncharacteristically exasperated. ‘i’ll be free after six.’ 

he looks weary—an expression that you’re not accustomed to seeing on him—and you can already feel your body begin to deflate with defeat. your lips part, but your answer is cut off by the second warning bell. 

‘i have to go,’ you sigh, tiredly. you tug the door open and after checking that the coast is clear, you step out into the hall, glancing at him from over your shoulder. he simply stands there, watching, dark brows pinching to the middle of his forehead. 

that is the last you see of him before the door swings shut behind you. 

๑ 

after changing your mind several times throughout the day, it is well past six pm when you arrive outside toji’s quarters. 

outside, the sun is beginning to set, casting an orange glow across the carpeted floor through the window in the hallway. you haven’t knocked on the door yet, despite having arrived some minutes ago, your eyelids heavy as you stare at the grain in the wood. 

you don’t know what you’re doing here. 

there’s a niggle of hope that can’t help but grow with each second that passes as you loiter by the door. you try to quash it down, because, really, what are the chances of this conversation going in the direction that you want it to? you have higher chances of him having called you over to formally end things for good. 

that thought makes your heart hurt. 

but, before you can hesitate any longer, there’s the clicking of the door unlocking before it swings open. 

as usual, he towers over you. 

there’s a tense moment where the both of you simply stare at one another, but the moment breaks when he shifts to the side, creating enough room for you to slip past him. inside, you’re greeted by the familiarity of his apartment, the heating turned up to the exact temperature that you like. you kick your shoes off and place them next to the shoe rack, stepping further inside as you listen to him lock the door behind you. he steps past you, leading the way toward the lounge, and you follow, only to loiter by the doorway, watching him drop his weight onto the settee. 

you’ve never seen him look so haggard before, and worry gnaws at you when a pair of forest green eyes blink to meet yours. 

‘you gonna stand there all night?’ he asks, already beckoning you over with a tap of his fingers on the seat next to him. you reluctantly make your way over, sitting with your back pressed to the opposite arm of the settee so that you can face him. 

‘so?’ 

he frowns at you, repeating, ‘so?’

‘what’d you ask me over for?’ 

his eyes flash with something you can’t decipher, and then he’s running a hand through his hair again, tugging the ends between his fingers. ‘look, i meant what i said the other night; it wasn’t what it looked like.’ when you don’t offer a response, he continues, ‘she’s a family friend, i’ve not seen her for a long time—for years.’ at this revelation, you start to feel a tad silly for your reaction, but there’s also a part of you that nags that he’s not telling you the whole truth. and as if he can read your thoughts, he adds, ‘we had… a thing… when we were young—very young—but that shit is long over. we’re friends, nothin’ more.’ 

you chew at the inside of your cheek as you mull his words over. eventually, you settle on scoffing, nose curling as you reply, ‘dunno what you’re telling me for. what you do is none of my business.’ 

at this, his spine straightens, and the look in his eyes hardens, ‘what’s that s’posed to mean?’ 

a large of you is hopeful that what he’s told you is the truth, but another part of you is still bitter about the situation. ‘it means that i don’t know why you told me to come over just to talk about this shit—’

‘’cause you’re pissed at me?’ he interrupts, looking more and more perplexed by your words. ‘i’ve been tryna call you for days, but you don’t pick up. you wouldn’t even look at me in class, ‘n’ then you tried to fuckin’ hide like i wouldn’t notice.’ he looks more upset than you’d anticipated. ‘i didn’t want to send you off like that, but—’

‘but what?’ it’s you who interrupts him this time, anger boiling at your blood. ‘but it’s okay because i’m just some dirty little secret of yours?’

‘is that what you’re pissed at?’ 

he looks even more weary than he had five minutes ago. 

‘look, it’s not easy for me either, alright? you think i want to keep sneakin’ ’round like some fuckin’ teenager? ‘m too old to be stressin’ over this shit. i don’t want—’

‘this shit?’ you snap, his words cutting deeper than you thought they would. ‘is that all i am? just some shit?’ 

‘what? you know that’s not what i meant—’ 

you scoff. ‘of course you didn’t.’ 

he snaps back at you, ‘will you just fuckin’ let me explain?’ 

‘really, it’s fine,’ despite your words, you feel the tell-tale prickle of tears burning the corners of your eyes. ‘it was just sex, anyway, right?’ 

he recoils, flinching as if you’ve just slapped him. 

‘what.’

it’s not a question. the word is said so quietly that you barely hear it, tone so flat that you think that you’ve actually offended him. 

‘is that…?’ he clears his throat, nostrils flaring as he inhales a deep breath. ‘is that what this is to you? just sex?’ 

he has the gall to look pained, and you almost fall for it. 

almost. 

you stand from the settee, his eyes following your every movement. ‘that was what you told me, remember? those words literally came out of your mouth.’ 

he mimics you, standing up to his full height, eyes glowering down at you. ‘that was two years ago! of course it was just sex—i barely fuckin’ knew you!’ 

‘well, it’s not like anything’s changed!’ you raise your voice back at him, eyes wet. ‘it’s always me crawling to you. it’s always me sneaking around. it’s always me who is never enough!’ your voice breaks around a sob, your head lowering as you furiously wipe at your tears. 

‘don’t—’ he starts, voice suddenly hoarse. ‘don’t cry.’ he reaches for you, and despite yourself, you collapse against his chest, your cries muffled into the fabric of his shirt. his scent envelopes you, and the heat of him makes your head spin, and yet, you cling to him when his fingers bury into the tresses of your hair. his lips are at your temple when he murmurs, ‘everythin’s changed.’ 

you stiffen, but he holds tight when you try to pull yourself free. 

‘’s’been a long time since i was with someone. last time was when my boy was born, ‘n’ he’s ‘bout your age now.’ you hear him inhale sharply, nose pressed to your hair. his voice muffled, he continues, ‘then i saw you, an’ i thought you were real fuckin’ pretty. was pissed as hell when i found out you were one of my students.’ his arms tighten around you, ‘then, when you fuckin’ jumped me in the hallway, i thought my old ass was dreamin’.’ 

‘not old,’ you mumble into his chest, which, in response, vibrates with a low chuckle that echoes down your ear. 

‘older,’ he corrects, mirth lacing his tone. he then exhales, ‘it was just sex. ‘cause it was the only way i could think to keep you interested.’ you remain quiet, teeth biting into your bottom lip. ‘but d’ya really think i’d be lettin’ us risk everythin’ for this long if that’s all i really wanted? if you weren’t worth every second of it?’

you don’t know how to answer that. 

he sighs, his breath fanning across the top of your head. for a long moment, you remain enveloped in his arms, and then, in the tiniest voice you’ve ever heard him muster, he admits, ‘really fuckin’ love you, idiot.’ 

your heart is jackhammering away in the depth of your chest, and for a second, you dread that you’ve misheard him. but then you feel the thump, thump, thump of his own heart racing underneath your ear, and he’s yet to let you free from his embrace. your arms, previously pressed to his chest, move to slowly curl around his waist, holding him just as tightly as he’s got you. 

‘love you too.’ 

the words are whispered into the collar of his shirt, but he clearly hears you because his fingers are now guiding your chin to angle your face toward his. his nose bumps along yours, lips pressing to the corner of your mouth. you chase him, moulding your lips together, his tongue making quick work of caressing its way into your mouth. he groans, and then his kisses are fever-like, and he’s tasting every inch of your mouth as if he hasn’t done so a hundred times before. 

you’re kissing him just as eagerly, your hands snaking under his shirt just to feel his skin. he guides you backwards, edging you to the direction of the bedroom, and you allow him to do so with your tongue curling up the length of his. he pants into your mouth, hands leaving your body to fumble with the door handle. he kicks the door open, then shut again after you enter the room, and he pushes at your shoulders until you’re lying on the plush mattress of his bed. you peer up at him, watching as he crawls over you, his hair tickling your forehead when he leans to claim your mouth once again. 

in between kisses, you both slowly work your way through removing each other’s clothes and when naked, he finally presses in on top of you, pinning you beneath him. there’s a clear size difference between the two of you, and you like just how much bigger he is, your fingers tracing over the curves of his biceps as he shifts above you. the length of his cock drags between your folds, the blunt tip catching on your clit at just the right angle, and you whimper for him. he responds with a low rumble that makes his chest vibrate against where it is pressed to yours, his teeth gently scraping along where he’s mouthing at your pulse. your fingers tangle between the strands of his hair, and you welcome his hot breath fluttering across the surface of your neck, eyes closing and lips parting around the shape of another moan. 

he moves, hips bumping into yours, and your breath catches as his cock drags with a delicious friction that coaxes his name from between your lips. he repeats the action at the same time his teeth nip at your collarbone, tongue darting out to soothe the sharp pain that erupts, leaving a mark on your skin. you encourage the grinding by curling your legs up and around his waist, your ankles locking tight. the action pushes him closer, and your clit throbs along with your pulse each time it is abused by his bulbous tip which has swollen to a size that is more than impressive. initially, the width of him had been more than daunting, and it had taken a little getting used to the feeling of it stretching you wide, but by now, you’ve taken him more times than you can count, and your hole has learned to flutter at the promise of being filled soon. 

and fill you, he does. 

you’re not at all prepared for when he angles his hips and aims a tad lower, but he’s soon drilling into you, your cunt quickly moulding into the shape of him. your walls burn with the stretch, but each thrust punches a choked moan from the back of your throat, causing your fingertips to make their home in the sharp lines of his shoulders. you feel his nose nudging its way up to the shell of your ear, a smile curving the shape of his mouth when he moans, ‘feel so fuckin’ good f’me, pretty girl.’ 

the praise encourages the clenching of your walls, vice-like grip greedily forcing his cock further inside with each forward cant of his hips. he grunts with effort, pelvis snapping backward and forwards so quickly that you can hear the continuous creaking of the bed-frame as he has his way for you. his fingers buried in the tresses of your hair, he angles his mouth to yours once more, his tongue merging with yours in a messy battle that makes your clit throb, throb, throb for him.

‘fuckin’—fuck,’ he groans loudly, before he’s jerking his cock away from the safe cavern of your heat, a weak moan of protest escaping you before it dies on the tip of your tongue when his hands grab at you and easily lift you from the mattress. ‘’gainst the wall, pretty,’ he orders, guiding you until your palms are pressed flat to the wall, his stomach warm on your back as he traps you against the head of the bed.

once more, his cock is enveloped by your heat, and he quickly sets a pace that makes you dizzy with need. nuzzling into the curve of your neck, he sucks a fresh mark, and subconsciously, your walls flutter around him again. sweat is quickly forming on the surface of your skin, but it doesn’t stop you from snaking a hand between your legs, fingers quickly circling your forgotten clit. 

‘hng, fuck, baby, that’s it,’ he groans, pelvis clapping against yours. ‘touch yourself f’me—yes, just like that.’ he sucks in a hiss, the noise morphing into a growl, his balls slapping tight onto your folds as he roughly pistons into you. your gooey walls welcome the assault, your slick suctioning him back inside each time his length retreats from your pussy. 

‘h-a—ah!’ you cry out, toes curling when your first orgasm hits you so suddenly that even he chokes out a surprised chuckle, lips pressed to the back of your neck. you can’t help the slacking of your jaw as his name is loudly expelled from your mouth, your fingers reaching up to pull at his hair. the throbbing of your walls has him gripping your hips so tight that you’re certain to wake with bruises tomorrow, but he continues to fuck you through it, prolonging the tingling that pounds at your clit. arousal drips, creaming a white foam around the base of his cock, and soon, the wet sound of your connection can be heard loud and clear, which, in turn, encourages his cock to twitch inside you. it takes a short while for you to recover, and through every second of it, his girth continues to stretch you in the best possible way. 

‘t-toji,’ you gasp, his lips pressed to your temple. a particularly harsh thrust almost has you toppling over and you desperately cling to the headboard in order to steady your balance. ‘toji, i—’

‘love you.’ 

he beats you to it, the words gruffly echoed down the canal of your ear and settling deep in the centre of your chest, where it spreads warmth across the entirety of your body. you can’t help it—a tear slips from the corner of your eye, and he’s quick to kiss it away. 

‘should’ve—hng, shit, baby—should’ve… should’ve told you b’fore.’ 

yes, he should have, but you don’t voice this opinion aloud, as you’re now distracted by the fact that he’s now manhandling you into another position. 

his back pressed to the headboard, you’re now straddling his lap, the tip of his cock kissing your cervix when you accidentally slide down a little too far. you jerk up again, and he moans quietly, neck stretching slightly as the back of his head rests on the headboard. through heavily lidded eyes, he watches you bend and bow above him, the greens of his eyes now glittering emeralds at you. outside, the setting sun dances a golden glow across his face and down his neck and it warms the emeralds until they are molten. his full lips are parted, low groans of encouragement panted through them as he allows you to take what you need from him. there are minuscule lines that are gently etched into the corners of his eyes, probably caused by lack of sleep. your thumbs reach out to stroke over the curves of his cheeks, and your lips form a soft smile when he presses his face into the palms of your hands. your hips stilling in favour of focusing on your index finger that is currently tracing his bottom lip, his eyelids dropping further when he kisses the pad of your finger. you know that he’d only scrunch his nose in disagreement if you’d ever voice it aloud, but like this, he looks beautiful. you grin at him, leaning to brush your nose against his, your lips ghosting over the scar on the corner of his mouth. it’s rare for you to show your appreciation for the old wound, but it makes his breath hitch every time that you do, and you wait to hear the sound before your lips press to his. 

slowly, you roll your hips, and he responds by moaning into the cavern of your mouth. 

It isn’t long before your thighs begin to shake with exertion, and his hands clutch to your ass, helping you along as he guides you to slide your pussy up the length of his girth, before dropping you back down with a wet squelch that makes your ears burn. your slick coats him, pooling into the tangle of pubic hair that is nestled between his legs. your clit rubs at the texture of it, and with each roll of your pelvis, it brings you closer and closer to your second orgasm. 

all too soon, your thighs are shaking, and your nails scratch into the skin of his abdominal muscles, which tense beneath you. he huffs a laugh at you, but before you reach your peak, he pulls you from him, gravity dropping the heavy weight of his cock to thump onto his abdomen as you cry out from the loss. he shushes you with a short kiss, before shifting the two of you into the spooning position. 

for the second time tonight, his chest is pressed flush to your back, and his arms wrap tight around you, his long frame tucking in behind you, and his fingers stretch to tangle with yours. this time, he fucks into you slowly, and with his head lowered to yours, he kisses the back of your neck. the silence is tender, and he’s twitching more often now, and you suspect that he’s just as ready to fill you with his cum as you are to receive it. and just a few more thrusts drive you both to the completion that you seek. 

his whole body coils tight before it shudders, a long, drawn out sigh of your name whispered into your hair. the familiar gush of his seed claims your inner walls as his own, and your weak mewl of his own name as you come undone has him thrusting one last time before he stills. 

it takes a long time for your body to settle afterwards, your skin clammy and your eyelids drooping so low that you feel as if you’re going to fall asleep. 

fingers are brushed through your hair, a kiss warming the back of your ear, and then all of a sudden, a stream of thick, white liquid oozes all over your thigh as his cock unplugs itself from its home inside your cunt. 

you are already dozing when his weight shifts from the bed, only to return to press a damp flannel between your legs. the rough material catches on your stimulated clit, and you protest weakly, despite the fact that your eyes refuse to open. this routine isn’t one that you’re a stranger to, and so when he kisses the crook of your knee, you laugh tiredly, but lack the energy to tell him that it tickles. your brain is foggy, just teetering on the edge of sleep, when you mumble your affections very quietly. the three words still somehow reach his ears, even though your voice is muffled because your cheek is smushed into the pillow. a breath is kissed to the inside of your wrist, long, strong fingers making their home between yours. 

you don’t hear his response. 

when you wake later, it is after dark. 

there’s a familiar weight at your back, and you’re pleased to realise that at some point whilst you were asleep, he’s tugged the covers up and over you. for a while, you lay there, listening to the sound of him breathing, before you decide that it’s probably well after the time of which you should be making your way back to your dorm. however, when you make to sneak from the bed, the weight of his arm around your middle tightens. 

‘where you goin’?’ 

his voice is several octaves deeper than usual, tone groggily thickened with sleep.  

‘stay.’ 

you feel just as tired as he sounds, but you know that you have to leave. this part is always the hardest, and it usually leaves you feeling a little sick each time. but today, it hurts just that bit more than usual, and you really don’t want to leave. it doesn’t help that he’s also not aiding the situation as he cages you underneath his arm. 

‘i have to go,’ you croak, your own voice heavily laced with exhaustion. ‘have class in the morning.’ 

‘i’ll sort it,’ he promises, nudging his head closer to yours. his fingers search for yours in the dark, trapping them between his own again. 

‘toji, i—’

your protest is interrupted when his chest heaves with a very dramatic sigh that puffs across the back of your head. ‘said i’ll sort it. promise.’ 

you hesitate. you’ve never been risky enough to stay the night, having always been gone long before the sun starts to rise. but he’s relaxed, unworried, and despite your worries, you trust him. as if sensing your apprehension, he tightens his embrace, enveloping your frame with the heat and scent of him. your eyes blink shut, and you’re so tired that you’re almost falling asleep again. he murmurs your name into the dark. 

‘stay,’ he breathes. 

and so, you do. 

© obitohno. all rights reserved. do not repost my works.

[simplyender]

More Spot headcanons please! His favourite season? Biggest pet peeve? His least favourite chore?

Aaaaaa thank you for asking!!

1. Fall, since it's not too cold, not too hot. Wearing multiple layers is still socially acceptable without the catch of him risking freezing to death(being dramatic here), and stuff like pumpkin spice lattes are in season. <- pre-collider reasoning ofc. He doesn't normally bother with clothes anymore, and drinking is no longer an easy task for him. :/

He's not a huge fan of winter (Johns always had poor circulation, although the alterations to his anatomy have...Sort of changed that? He feels temperature differently now, and his outwards body heat is not the same of a normal humans, I imagine it like half a degree warmer than room temperature) nor summer (his apartment gets hot enough as is with all the running tech, hes running out of space for fans and keeps forgetting to buy an air conditioner). Springs pretty ok too, but he's not too thrilled about the heightened chance of getting rained on or the odd lightning-induced-blackout ruining all of his progress.

One downside of fall for him is when leaves get blown in to his face. Somehow this has happened to him both pre-collider (got slapped in the face by big leaf) and post-collider (big leaf went through his face). Still loves stepping on the crunchy ones though.

2. I'd say the big one is getting cut off or ignored when he's talking about something, especially if it's important to him. But since we're already here, here's another two- People misspelling his name. It happens ALL. THE. TIME. It's J-o-h-n-a-t-h-o-n. Yes- With another 'o', not an 'a'. And then there's that occasional brow raise he gets followed by people asking him "...So your name is John Ohnn?" because of the rhyme. Just plain groan-and-eyeroll-worthy. As far as he's concerned anybody that still laughs at his name has the sense of humor of a middle-schooler. If you're gonna make fun of him, at least say something new.

3. Doing the dishes. He always forgets to or pushes it off, it's just such a drag(not as bad once he gets around to it and does it tbh.). Especially because he's also got to gather all the stuff he leaves around beforehand. And somehow he always finds more after he's done, and the cycle just keeps going. Even WORSE now that he's got literal holes in his arms, so if he's not careful and his wrist goes under the faucet while there's a spot on there, he risks leaking on the floor, or if he puts a spoon under it at just the right angle and it sprays at him, there's a pretty high chance that it'll get in to one or more of his holes, and then out of multiple others, and it's just...So annoying to clean up. And so bad with all the electronics around his place.

[burningvelvet]

Quickly and poorly reviewing and ranking adaptations of Jane Eyre (1996, 1997, 2006, 2011) by their pros and cons:

1996 pros:

Best fire scene, easily. It actually gave me that excited feeling that good cinema gives a person. Much of the cinematic art was enjoyable altogether, including the costumes.

This film probably has ond of the best Bertha's in my opinion. She's truly sympathetic, beautiful, and fierce. probably tied for my favorite Bertha actress with 2006. She and Poole are given little time in the story, however.

Most adaptations shit on St. John. Here, that isn't the case. What little time he has is spent in making him much more appealing than I've ever seen him, both physically and characteristically. I like this, because many forget that Jane did love him in her way, and he is supposed to be attractive and nice despite his zealotism.

1996 has the best Adèle, which is amazing for me as a big Adèle fan. There is more focus on her and her relationships with Jane/Rochester. I particularly love the scene where J draws R and Adèle tries to play cupid a little, and when Adèle is offended when the ladies insult Jane.

Best Lowood plot by far. This is the first time I've been able to stand the Young Jane scenes, and little time was devoted to her early life with the Reeds, just enough to let us know she was abused. I like this choice. The young actresses playing Jane and Helen were the best and most rebelious I've seen yet. Their hair cutting scene brought tears to my eyes, which rarely ever happens for me.

Good Blanche plotline. I absolutely love the cinematography/aesthetic & set design.

1996 cons:

the actors are individually endearing in some ways (the scene of Jane and the mirror is particularly touching, as is their reunion). However, The biggest downside to this adaptation is that the chemistry between Jane and Rochester was lacking in my opinion. this is particularly notable in their meeting scene and first proposal scene.

William Hurt is a fantastic actor, and he's likeable, but he's not my favorite Rochester ever. He's alright. On a rewatch I could see myself warming to him more.

I love Charlotte Gainsbourg more for her music than her acting. Granted, she was young here like Jane is supposed to be, so I do not blame her. Visually, aside from her height, I can absolutely see her as Jane. As the film went on I warmed to her acting style; Jane Eyre is a hard role to perform due to her inwardness. I don't think she was horrible, but Anna Paquin (of later True Blood fame) as Young Jane Eyre somewhat outshined Gainsbourg.

I was disappointed in Adèle being sent away to school before the disaster and her not coming back in the end (why couldn't they have had her running with Pilot in the landscape shot!!!).

1997 pros:

Maybe the most accurate Jane and Rochester. I wasn't expecting to like him at all but he blew me away. excellent chemistry between the actors. The dancing scene was very captivating, as was the scene with him jumping from the walkway, their outdoor talks, him chasing her down the stairs — really, I was impressed, because I thought I'd hate this film. Like in the novel and in 96, both actors are a bit conventionally unattractive (well, compared to 11 and to some extent 06) - and like them, the characters grow on you.

BEST ST. JOHN (although 2006 has the best Rivers sisters) - St. John is described as being nice though serious, and looking like a statue of a Greek God with all the coldness AND beauty - and this movie is the only one who relatively understood that assignment (96 came close emphasizing his niceness). Most adaptations adapt his coldness but not his conventional Eurocentric good looks, which not only symbolize his colonizer attribute but also his appeal to Jane and the others. It's also important to have a conventionally handsome actor play St. John just as it's important to have a conventionally less attractive Jane Eyre because one theme of the novel is the critique of Victorian physiognomy & beauty; Jane/Rochester being unconventionally attractive is a contrast to Bertha, St. John, Blanche, Georgiana being attractive, so I think this element is not inconsequential. The difficult part is that beauty is highly subjective, so relying on conventional standards is key, as is the reminder that Victorian standards were a bit different from our own.

good Lowood plotline, good Gateshead plotline, fantastic Adèle with lots of adorableness & miraculous though OOC bonding between her and Rochester, fantastic costuming (though I don't know about accuracy), good Blanche plotline overall. Probably my favorite Bertha plotline for being sufficiently creepy.

1997 cons:

this isn't really a con for me but many people may dislike 97 Rochester for being passionate to the point of coming off crazy, and physical domineering as when he grabs Jane when she tries to leave — however, this does kind of fit for canonical Rochester & I don't mind it since he's supposed to be that way, but this is still arguably a con nevertheless. he does come off as too forward but i get they were trying to capture the whole overpassionate thing. it does come off as a little more toxic than other depictions perhaps!

I have very few complaints overall. I don't think the chemistry is as appealing as 2006, but it is accurate. I wish there was more Adèle, but you can't have everything.

The posters are bad and make the actors look worse than they are which subsequently turns people away. I think 1996 was marketed a bit better but that 2006 also suffers from bad poster syndrome which had an effect on me also. Presentation is important; marketing and advertising are also important in cinema. The aesthetic isn't as good as 1996 although I don't think the visuals are bad overall.

Jane is a little dissociative seeming, which can be off-putting for myself and other viewers I assume, but to be fair she is described as being like a weird little elf creature in the book, and the actress plays this very well, actually looking quite ill when Rochester asks if she is.

2006 pros:

Best chemistry between Jane/Rochester by far and for this reason will always be my favorite because it actually made me fall in love with Rochester in the end though I didn't like his portrayal at all at first (that's power! — and my love for this Rochester should arguably be a con for the sake of my sanity and pride). best Rochester imo and a fantastic Jane. I love love love the way they did the Rochester storytime flashbacks and fleshed out his character as a result.

Best and most enjoyable Blanche Ingram plotline by far (although no one likes the lack of Rochester-in-drag, the party scenes & insertion of the twin flame theory was delightful).

some of the best dialogue, fantastic Adèle plotline, good Bertha plotline, best Pilot, best Rosamond, good costuming, good sets/locations (the fairytale ambience of Jane walking outside before meeting Rochester! Rochester's weird study!), I like the extra focus placed on themes such as nature/genetics/science, religion, travel, sexuality, etc.

2006 cons:

I dislike the way they did the Lowood and Gateshead plots, and although the Rivers sisters were good, I resent their St. John plotline for the most part. I disliked the lack of mystery surrounding Bertha; I think they made it way too obvious & not creepy enough, especially in showing her perspective from the window and giving her lines (one line, calling Jane a whore in Spanish) which no other adaptation does. I was sorely bored before and after Thornfield and only really revived when she got back to Ferndean (although Jane's flashbacks and some of the St. John plotline [the references to love, reminding us of her inner thoughts of Rochester] kept me alive). I suppose there were prices to pay for the excellence of the Jane and Rochester moments. - in comparison these seem like small prices, but still!

2011 pros:

deciding to go with a non-linear structure was a fantastic choice though I was skeptical of it at first, good St. John plotline for the most part & which they put emphasis on, really fantastic Jane with a lot of good fierce moments & lines, maybe the best Gateshead plotline including Mrs. Reed & the Red Room scene (although the lack of red was disappointing, and the lack of explanation for the chimney monster is conflicting – was it all in her head?), good young Jane, one of the best Richard Masons, star-studded cast, good dialogue, maybe the best costuming, Aesthetic™️

2011 cons:

least favorite adele (not insulting the child actress, this is the fault of the writers/directors)

— this is where i call security to protect me from an onslaught of jane eyre 2011 fans here on tumblr. alright, maybe i should watch it again — but i was expecting a lot more. particularly from michael fassbender as mr. rochester. probably my least favorite rochester by far & the least sympathetic. this rochester captures the dark and dangerous part of him but imo not so much the higher feelings that define him. the lack of humour & lack of unrepressed passion/drama/rage is noticeable - rochester isn't supposed to be quiet; as toby stephens (2006) said in an interview, rochester never shuts up in the book, he's really too eccentric to even be adapted accurately; he has to be toned down to be realistic, but here he's muted too far. - i felt like mia was carrying all of their scenes on her back & that the chemistry really rested on her primarily.

Cinematography-wise, there are some gems in the stills (famous hand holding gif), but I dislike the overall muted palette of the film; many will think this suits the tone and in some ways I agree, however, I will always prefer color and dislike the epidemic of desaturation we've seen so often in 21st century cinema. For this reason, 96, 97, 06 all triumph against 2011 aesthetically for me personally, although I still recognize some of the artistry of 2011, it is not my preference.

My overall ranking: 2006 (primarily for Jane/Rochester), 1997 (excellent overall), 1996 (good but flawed), 2011 (I tried but overall did not enjoy it).

[intoloopin]

♯ ° ؂ A LOOK INTO iNSYNC CITY: LOOPiN INDIVIDUAL FANDOMS RANKED FROM THE TAMEST TO THE WORSE.

♯ ° 10 ؂ (🏆) DRUMPICKS / DRUMDANS (for HANJAE)

Recently named by Hanjae himself -- who was visibly emotional when he realized he had grown a big enough fanbase to demand distinction --, the title Drumpick comes from a mixture of 'drumsticks' and 'guitar picks', the two things multi instrumentalist Hanjae always carries with him. It's also the lovely abbreviation of 'the drummers picks'; as much as they have picked Hanjae, Hanjae, LOOPiN's designated drummer by sport, has picked them as well. In their vast majority Drumdans, as they often go by online, seek almost no trouble and cause no harm in iNSYNC spaces, since Hanjae has next to none anti sentiment in fandom; to everyone these days, is undeniable that his talent in dancing, rapping, acting and even producing at times makes him a precious hidden threat.

The biggest bickering happens amongst Drumpicks themselves, with fans of Hanjae, the Idol and Hanjae, the Actor, constantly disagreeing on who truly supports Hanjae the most -- with his recent acting fanbase being quite loud about their beliefs of being stronger Drumdans.

♯ ° 09 ؂ (☁️) ELMOS (for DYLAN)

To first explain why Elmos was Chihoon's name of choice, is necessary to explain that Dylan has been on a running gag with Sesame Street characters since his debut, specially Big Bird, who was his Halloween costume for The Loop Halloween Party of 2019, his icon on every single social media, and the most referenced character by him out of any piece of media -- even in songs. Naturally, the Chihoon enthusiastics got in on the joke too and started to deem themselves 'Elmos', which to him was hilarious. From then on, they got his blessing to consider that the name of his personal fandom, to the point yellow and red are now often associated with his solo stans.

As it's easy to assume, Dylan is the members who takes his solo fanbase the least seriously, running under the assumption that every LOOPiN fan with him as a bias is in on the joke too. He much rather prefers to acknowledge everyone as an iNSYNC, even if they tell him they're only rooting for him -- which is something some chronically online Elmos can get pretty defensive and dragged about by OT10 stans.

♯ ° 08 ؂ (🌻) SONGSYNCS (for TAESONG)

Songsyncs, an abbreviation for 'iNSYNCs for Taesong', is the only fandom that still keeps the oldschool LOOPiN stan nomenclature the solo fandoms used to adopt back in their early years; and now that Taesong has started to recognize and address them as such, they don't feel a need to change. Taesong attracts fans much like himself, meaning that to outsiders or baby iNSYNCs they can appear to be much calmer then they actually are.

But if you go deeper into the Songsync rabbit hole, you'll see they get extremely protective of Taesong over anything, and even have a code of their own for shading other members and their fanbases; although you will very rarely find them starting a fight, you for sure will see them quietly liking and vague tweeting about any iNSYNC drama, no exceptions.

♯ ° 07 ؂ (🦎) GYUGENIES (for GYUJIN)

Coming into the group years after debut, one of the first questions Gyujin ever got on fan meetings was what should his fans be called -- a heated topic at the time given his polemic addition to LOOPiN, two mere weeks after Beomseok's official departure, that parted the fanbase into his supporters and people who were not thrilled to have him around. He almost immediately picked Gyugenies, 'Gyujin's genies', as they are the people who made his wish of debuting come true. To many, it's by now a consensus that they have become the funniest and most entertaining sub fandom.

On their downside, Gyugenies sometimes have an exclusionist tendency towards some of the members or full group activities -- that sort of 'Gyujin is the only reason LOOPiN finally looked interesting to me, anyway' or 'All the others have too many fans already, let's just focus on him' mentality that OT10s don't appreciate, and has spread a littleto even iNSYNCs with a Gyujin ult or bias. It's clear that if Gyujin isn't involved, don't even bother trying to recuit them for anything regarding LOOPiN; they won't tune in, and won't hesitate to bringing up how long it took for groups fans to like him either.

♯ ° 06 ؂ (🎧) AMWOOS (for MINWOO)

Taking direct inspirations from Minwoo's producer allias BANGMFM, AMWoos -- pronounced A-M-Woos, like the radio frequency that came before FM and served as its base -- have had their bloodthirsty days; if the ranking took place back in 2020 or 2021, they would have been on the Top3 at the very least. But ever since Minwoo stepped up from honorary leader back when Taesong went on his 2021 hiatus, to official leader in 2022 and onwards, the fanbase has in its majority calmed down; although their air of superiority still remains, and it runs strong.

AMWoos have made a point loud and clear from their early days that they believe Minwoo is in a whole lane above any other LOOPiN member, and Minwoo's lack of recognition of them by name isn't even drag worthy to them; on the contrary, they think Minwoo's fanservice towards iNSYNCs, something so unnatural of him, is way less sincere than the quiet appreciation they receive by him in clues. The fandom operates much more quietly these days and, seeming to have fought all fights already years back, are left alone by anyone who's smart enough to not poke the beehive.

♯ ° 05 ؂ (🦔) HOJEOGONS (for HAEGON)

Placed right in the middle comes Hojeogons, Haegon's solo stans and the most 'sink or swim' out of them all; they're either the calmest or the most intense, no in-between. The Hojeo in their name comes from the romanization of the korean word for 'porcupine', Haegon's representative emoji and favorite animal, while the 'gon' is obviously taken from his name -- less obviously from the romanization of 'bear', which correlates to past LOOPiN member Beomseok's old fandom name, Gonbeoklies, as both used to be considered a package deal.

Haegon is an open and emotional book in all senses, which tends to get him in hot waters, and Hojeogons are always the first in line to defend him from being misunderstood. Their growing eagerness to see the youngest of the team interact with Idols other than his bandmates has been a currently sensitive topic, specially after Beomseok left LOOPiN; Beomseok as a whole is a whole can of worm's for Hojeogons, who have grown to pretend he never existed as they understand that's what Haegon would want, something older iNSYNCs find absurd to even consider.

♯ ° 04 ؂ (💎) RARERUKIS (for HARUKI)

Rarerukis, much like AMWoos, have been much bigger menaces in the past -- namely the period in which Haruki began his modeling career and fell into the good graces of Knets back in 2020, when they braced his merits as if they were their own and won the animosity of iNSYNCs with their big ego --, but they're still very much loud. Taking Haruki's diamond stan emoji extremely seriously, they know they have found a rare jewel to stan in him; the 'ruki' being often spoken as 'ruby', the crystal that has one of Haruki's favorite color.

With Haruki taking a quieter, less commercial approach to his career, as well as his more constant reminders of how much he enjoys unity and dislikes any of his bandmates exclusionists, has began a quiet change in Rarerukis pattern of behavior; after all, if there is one thing that's true to them almost universally, is the want to not cause him trouble or tarnish his fleeting reputation. Still, don't you dare say any other member is an IT Boy of any sort -- unless you want to see multiple 'Haruki Being The Ultimate Face Of LOOPiN' threads to invade your timeline for two days, at the very least.

♯ ° 03 ؂ (🤓) WIZZARDOS / WIZZARS (for O.Z)

Given his stage name, the connection drawn between O.z and The Wizard Of Oz was inevitable and surprisingly well received by Zhiming himself, who's added the 🧙‍♂️ emoji to his online sign-offs. Wizzardos are the first ones that come to mind when iNSYNCs think of a pretentious crowd. Good luck trying to express even the tiniest criticism of Zhiming's music or Idol demeanor to a Wizzar -- even the pacifist ones won't let it slide without a lecture. Since O.z also works outside of LOOPiN in a duo with soloist sensation NICO, his fanbase is almost a perfect half and half of iNSYNCS and people with no real interest in the group, a mix that tends to attract tension. They're also credit for popularizing calling LOOPiN stans Insects in petty fanwars.

But even the most hardcore iNSYNCS recognize they are the easiest of the solo fandoms to join, given O.z's polarizing history and the old jokes that are still being made about and towards him even by a percentage of OT10s -- to the point that any vocal Zhiming ult is often presumed to be an Wizzar akgae or at least an akgae sympathizer (because most truly are.) They're also regarded as the easiest people to offend and hardest ones to please.

♯ ° 02 ؂ (🗣️) SOOSOULS / SONNYSIDES (for SEUNGSOO)

Seungsoo has a quite notorious solo fanbase, with a reputation that grows more intense by the year. They're in between names at the moment, with many Soosouls, as they've been deemed since 2019, growing pretty found of Sonnysides, named after Seungsoo's recently updated producer tag, NASONNY. On a study on their crazy loyalty and how hard they regard and promote him as a person and an artist, most point Seungsoo's tendency to 'vent' to fans too openly as the main reason for the parasocial relationships between him and Soosouls growing a little out of control, as they take it as 'fresh' and 'real'.

What iNSYNCs agree is the factor that keeps them at bay and prevents them from being crowned the most annoying bunch of LOOPiN solo stans you can find these days, is how Seungsoo has most times eventually come forward to tell them to cut their antics out when they go overboard; be it by asking them to not trend tags pushing him to go solo or to not pick fights with other people over his 'deserved group positions'. He's clearly not a fan of the Soopremacist corner of his stans, as most call them, but doesn't seem too displeased to have an army ready to defend him.

♯ ° 01 ؂ (🌟) J.J.B.BS (for J.J)

To be a J.J.B.B -- J.J's Babies and Besties, as he baptized them himself in a fancall that's now considered both iconic and cursed LOOPiN media --, tick skin has been a must from day one; after all, Jiahang debuted with the 'filler' title firmly attached to him from LOOPiN's first ever stage. They were the very first solo fandom to be acknowledge, with Jiahang pushing the name himself early in his debut day and onwards as something private, a practice that was frowned upon and backlashed by iNSYNCs strongly, and only helped push the 'it's us against the world' mentality that keeps J.J.B.Bs so united and focused on J.J alone, no exceptions.

As a point of merit, you really can't find a more tight run ship: from the chinese bars to international fans, J.J.B.Bs are regarded as 'the final bosses' of individual events and stream parties, and won't ever let anything involving Jiahang fail. Calling yourself a J.J.B.B in the first place is already admitting you're not too far from being an only stan. The most extreme side of his fandom has been not so kindly nicknamed by iNSYNCs as BBitches, and are in a way or another always at the center of the hurricanes -- provoking other fandoms, making fun of other members and overall being the most frustrating people to encounter when they're on Xu Jiahang defense mode, which is next to always.

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Last one from ISWM for now dhjshssh

what if Captain was like know for not really liking/celebrating Valentine's day or it was just a rumor or something (totally not my aro-ass projecting * cough cough* i have no idea what you're talking about) so Mark is really touched when at the end of the day there's a very beautiful valentine from them in his cryo machine (or whatever the thing was, ya know sleep box) - List Anon

You were known for not being the biggest fan of Valentine’s Day.

Nobody knew why, but you didn’t seem particularly eager to tell them if you had a date with anyone this year. You just carried on like it was any ordinary day, debriefing with crewmembers and making sure things were running smoothly.

Unfortunately, this also included ensuring no couples were too distracted from their duties. But you didn’t demerit them for smooching or cooing at each other every second.

Nah, you’re not that cruel.

Throughout the day you’ve gotten cute valentine E-cards from your crew. While mostly platonic, you could tell some of them had a die-hard crush on you and aimed to make it as obvious as possible.

You just chuckled and switched off the tablet, focusing on the project before you with a proud smile. It was finally finished. And just in the nick of time, too.

The ship was currently on-course for a sector populated by a friendly alien colony who said they can provide fuel and food (actual food besides sandwiches).

The downside? It was a 3-week journey. 

You overheard Mark whining about it and thus permitted half the crew to go into hypersleep if they desired to at the end of today.

Knowing he’d be the first to jump into his cryopod, you quickly went to the bridge to check it, discreetly carrying your “project” the whole way. After making sure all the systems were properly running, you placed it on the floor, leaving a note on the front and shutting the door tight.

You hoped he’ll like it.

........

With a yawn, Mark shuffled towards his cryopod, looking forward to a nice long nap on the way to the alien colony. 

He deserved it, because he loved himself.

Lately his engineering team was being a pain in his ass as they, once again, questioned his blueprints and complained about everything he suggested. He definitely didn’t wanna spend the next three weeks dealing with them.

It didn’t help that most of them were dating somebody, leaving him as the only single engineer on the Invincible II.

Sad.

This put him in a slightly sour mood as he opened his pod door and stepped inside-

Only for his boot to kick something over.

“What the..” Blinking in confusion, he looked down and realized it was a piece of a meteorite you were studying. But there was something unique about this, as it was carved into the shape of a heart.

Was it for him? Did he actually have a secret admirer aboard this ship??

The only person he could think of was-

Wait..hold the damn phone.

You? The captain who didn’t fancy Valentine’s Day?? Gave him a valentine???

Mark’s heart was skipping beats as he picked up the rock, holding it in front of his face with a radiant smile. It was beautiful, and just for him and him alone, which the note stuck to it confirmed.

‘Looks like today didn’t suck after all.’ He couldn’t stop grinning as he held it to his chest, shutting the pod door and leaning back against the wall.

As much as he wanted to sprint back to your cabin and thank you personally, he was far too exhausted and just wanted to sleep.

Oh well.

At least he had something nice to dream about along the way.

[venjamin-kingdomhearts]

Ventus and Vanitas for the character asks!! 3, 8, 21, 22, and 23! Sorry if that's too many? You don't gotta do all of em!

HELLO thank you for the ask!! this is a lotta questions but i'm excited to answer them!! Warning, there's a little negativity since some of the questions ask for dislikes about the characters. I love both Ven and Vanitas, I'm just saying my personal thoughts on them! + If you don't agree with these thoughts that's not a huge deal to me, we just agree to disagree LOL

3. Least favorite canon thing about this character?

Ventus - The "You're awful, Aqua" scene. Please Ventus I know you're upset but APOLOGIZE TO AQUA she didn't deserve that. I wish his and Aqua's relationship had more focus in general, because they're really cute when they're together. I genuinely hope Ventus apologizes to her for being a brat in BBS though

Vanitas - To be honest, anything I dislike about Vanitas comes from fanon, since I feel Vanitas does his role as antagonist really well.

8. What's something the fandom does when it comes to this character that you despise?

Ventus - Two big things.

One: Portraying him as a coldblooded killer when in comes to the KHUX/Strelitzia stuff. I think it's a lot more fun that Ventus didn't mean to hurt anyone, but ended up being responsible for so much pain. It's really tragic, and I think it makes KHUX more interesting as opposed to "Ventus killed Strelitzia out of malice". Also, it's genuinely just funnier like that. I know it's dark but nothing makes me laugh more than the mental image of 10 year old Ventus covered in blood just going "wow is this strawberry jam?? lol how'd this end up here?"

Two: Not the biggest fan of people like. Boiling Ventus' personality to just "oh he's baby". I think Ventus being childish is a really important character flaw, but he's got a lot more to him than just that, and his youthful nature has upsides and downsides. On this note I 100% think Ventus knows what sex is and that that's how babies are made. I know it's a weirdly popular portrayal to just have him not know what sex is at 17 years old. It's also a lot funnier if Ventus just has a different vocabulary from the other characters his age when it comes to adult topics and doesn't understand slang because Master Eraqus taught him that it's impolite to use term XYZ or whatever. Vanitas - Okay this is rough because there's a lot in the KH fandom's portrayals of Vanitas that I really don't like and other things that I really love. But to match Ven I'll boil it down to two big things: One: This one is kinda hard to explain but. I know that Ventus and the Wayfinder Trio DO NOT have to be present in every "Vanitas Redemption Fanfiction" but it really grinds my gears when they're treated as, like, 'close-minded' and completely left out of Vanitas' life. The idea that Vanitas is secretly a good guy and it's just his relationship with the Wayfinders/the Wayfinders themselves are the problem is just such a boring take. They don't have to be on good terms but have Vanitas earn their tolerance, have them settle things, man! It's SO JUICY when they have to work things out or Vanitas feels actual regret and isn't just handed the "you're a good guy now and we trust you" stuff on a silver platter. Ventus, Sora, and Vanitas are a trio...I think that if Sora takes in Vanitas as a friend, he should at least try to understand Ventus' fears about the whole thing.

Two: I think its a BILLION times funnier if Vanitas is shorter than Ventus but SO MANY PEOPLE MAKE HIM TALLER IT PISSES ME OFF. Vanitas and Ventus are either the same size OR Vanitas is shorter. No more tall Vanitas. I am on my hands and knees begging you all. Short King Vanitas. SHORT. KING. VANITAS. As a short person I need this. DO IT FOR ME.

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like?

Ventus - Hardest thing for me to write when it comes to Ventus are. Sassy remarks/comebacks, and times I'd KNOW he'd be a brat but I can't bring myself to write him saying anything too harsh. But my favorite things to do? I love giving Ventus issues/fears that he would reasonably develop after his 12 year nap. I don't care if canon says he doesn't have horrible insomnia after KH3. He SHOULD have horrible insomnia and I WILL write him crying in frustration when he's struggling with sleep.

Vanitas - I actually don't write Vanitas much. I feel like I can't do him justice, but it's fun to have him just be a douche-bag sometimes. I think I'm not great at his dialogue, but writing about his feelings towards Ventus is fun.

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to ths character? Something you don't like?

Ventus - I LOVE fics where Ventus is forced to take a more responsible role, or has to balance his childish nature with a growing sense of maturity. This is one of the reasons I'm SUCH a huge fan of fanfics where Ventus is like a big brother figure to Sora. I also LOVE LOVE LOVE fics where Ventus' anger is explored like. Oh he is FULL of anger, man. As much love and kindness that's in his heart. There is Hatred there too. AND ANY FIC THAT REVOLVES AROUND HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH SORA AND HOW BEING IN SORA'S HEART AFFECTS HIM. Fic recs that have some of the above tropes!

Hurricane Heartbeat by Dorked

Sleeping hearts often wander by Bommie20

How Long Have You Known Sora, Exactly? by 13thSyndicate

Three Quarters by angeltheatre For Ventus stuff I don't like, see question 8's answer

Vanitas - I love when he's kinda. Forcibly made to form a "truce" with Ventus but keeps testing him. I love fics where Ven's just minding his own business and Vanitas is like "I'm gonna start shit >:)" and they both get called out for being idiots when they fight each other. But OH MAN. MORE THAN THAT. I love love love when fics have Vanitas adapt the attitude of "No one can hurt Ventus BUT ME." it's my favorite flavor of protective Vanitas. For stuff I don't like, see question 8's answer

23. Favorite picture of this character?

[fatalism-and-villainy]

top five Hannibal episodes, maybe?

This is an ever-fluctuating list, but:

Mizumono - best episode of the show, point blank, in my opinion. It's so full of suspense but doesn't feel rushed or like it's cramming too much in. Everything has time to breathe and let you feel its weight. Things like Alana's feeling of violation from Hannibal's deception aren't just remarked upon, we stop and watch her get slowly submerged in black water, her nightmare come to life. Will's struggle with himself is fully internal, but so perfectly conveyed through visual storytelling - the parallel conversations with Jack and Hannibal, each representing one side of him, and then the two halves of Will's face coming together as if they're both a mask, with no one, least of all Will himself, knowing which one is "real." Will being visited by GJH, the spectre of his own darkness, right before the destruction of the family that Hannibal stole from Hobbs. The callbacks in the visual motifs in the final sequence to the first episode, but this time Hannibal isn't helping Will keep Abigail alive. The way their confrontation isn't really a fight, it's just emotionally raw and desperate, with Will's veneer of detached confidence cracking for the first time in this arc. The most perfect encapsulation of how gentle all the violence between them is. Its only structural flaw is that the Abigail reveal isn't well handled, but I'd chalk that up to structural problems with the whole season. The rest of it is perfectly set up by the rest of the arc, like meat falling off the bone.

Coquilles - the first season 1 episode that's really, really good. All the moving parts seem to come together, with the case of the week smoothly establishing resonances with Will's issues and Bella's. Aesthetically, the murders capture the true essence of the show - grotesque yet sacred, committed with complete and utter earnestness on the part of the killer. The vigilantism and obsession with salvation for his victims has significant parallels to how I imagine Will might function post-canon, and it's telling that this is the first time we get foreshadowing for his potential transformation. And I love the inexplicable magic realism of killer's visions of his victims heads' on fire, and how that strangeness gets folded in on itself even more with the symbolism of Will's head on fire, within his own hallucination. Wonderful bizarro arthouse feel with beautifully human performances from Laurence Fishburne and Gina Torres to ground the whole thing.

Su-zakana - One of the best episodes for balancing complete absurdity with pure poetry. The woman inside a horse with a live bird inside her chest, as a symbolic rebirth, is totally insane and yet! It works! It's beautiful! It's macabre humour married to sweeping romanticism! It's Will's love for Hannibal that can't die no matter how much it's buried! Peter and the social worker act out an absurd, deliberately-credulity-straining pantomime of Will and Hannibal's dynamic - completely with the absolutely ludicrous, fantastic imagery of the social worker crawling out of that horse - and yet in its absurdity it paints such an effective contrast, really shows that Hannibal cares for Will, in his own twisted beautiful way, in a way that Ingram never cared about Peter. "I envy you your hate" hits so hard. Also it introduces Margot and features heavy-handed fishing metaphors, which is fun. Only downside is we have to watch Hannibal and Alana have sex, which is not my idea of fun.

Yakimono - I'm so attached to this one, despite not being the biggest 2A fan. Really the centerpiece of this one is the framing of Chilton, which yields some of the most superb black comedy of the entire show. The OTT shock and horror on Chilton’s face when he looks up and sees Hannibal standing over him all murder-suited up. Hannibal saying “one moment, please” to the federal officers knocking on the door while he is chloroforming Chilton unconscious. The whole hilarious sequence of Chilton wandering around the carnage in his house with that pitch-perfect music. The chase at the end with him running ineffectively from Jack. Absolute masterful comedy work from Raúl Esparza. Also throw in that gorgeous flower tree tableau empathy sequence with Will carrying the heart to the sculpture and making it beat and Miriam Lass’ weirdly kinky summation of her time in captivity… it’s just so high up on my list for enjoyment.

Antipasto - I’m not sure whether this is strictly top 5 for me BUT I do feel like I need some 3A representation on this list given how much I love that arc as a whole, especially episodes 1-3, and how much space it takes up in my imagination. Of those first three episodes, this is really the best one, imo - I love the way it captures a dreamlike, fantasy version of Italy, with all these dark fairytale undertones (especially with scenes like Bedelia in the bath - the sense of getting pulled into this fantasy as frightening and yet compelling, like being on the edge of the sublime). I love its subtlety in engaging with Will’s absence - it’s not over-the-top in establishing Hannibal’s loneliness, and Will’s absence is only mentioned once, in flashback at that, but it so neatly ties together all the subtextual threads woven through most of the episode that his usual shenanigans aren’t satisfying anymore without an equal partner, and that Bedelia isn’t filling that role. And the final shots of Hannibal folding origami on the train are soooo good.