#the birbs with Tate and Molly

[thelastspeecher]

Phoenix Enchantment AU: Redux

@nour386, when I answered your ask yesterday, I said I had a writing in the works.  Well, I wrote it.  And here it is.  The Phoenix Enchantment AU, but with Ford and Fiddleford as the ones to be turned into phoenixes.  I have some additional ideas (bc I cannot control myself), but this is what I’ve got so far.  Hope ya like it.

              Crash!  The distinct sound of breaking glass startled Ford and Fiddleford out of their slumber.

              “What the hell was that?” Ford muttered.

              “Burglars, maybe?” Fiddleford said. “I mean, the house does look uninhabited.”  He sighed.  “Should we go handle it?”

              “I think-” Ford started.  He stopped.  Voices were carrying to the bedroom.  

              “Good Lord,” a distinct, southern female voice said.

              “Angie!” Fiddleford chirped excitedly.  He stood upright, suddenly full of energy.  “She’s here!”

              “What happened?” a second familiar voice asked.  Ford’s eyes widened.

              “Stan!” he squawked.

              “This place is a sty,” Stan continued.  “There’s no way Fidds has been here recently.  He wouldn’t let it get this messy.”

              “Agreed,” Angie said.  She took a shuddering breath.  “Where- where should we start lookin’ fer clues?”

              “I dunno.  The bedroom? I can smell whatever’s in the fridge from here, so the further you get from the kitchen, the better,” Stan answered. Angie sighed.

              “Don’t treat me like I’m made of glass, Stanley.”

              “Just bein’ careful,” Stan muttered.  Ford and Fiddleford could hear their siblings in the hallway now.  The door, which was slightly ajar, opened the rest of the way, revealing Stan and Angie.  Fiddleford let out a hum of greeting.  “What the- why are there two big-ass birds here?” Stan demanded.  He stormed towards the nest on the bed. “Get outta here!  Go on, shoo!”  Stan gestured wildly at Ford and Fiddleford.  Ford hissed instinctively.

              “Stanley, don’t be rude!” Fiddleford squawked.  Stan frowned.

              “Angie, I don’t want ya in here, there’s bird shit all over.”

              “Stan, cut it out!” Angie snapped.  “It’s fine!”  She joined Stan in front of the nest.  

              “Get away from the birds,” Stan said, putting an arm in front of her. She sighed.

              “If I have to tell ya one more time-”

              “Why is Stan bein’ so overprotective?” Fiddleford burbled curiously.  Angie froze.  She stared at Fiddleford.  Her eyes met his.  “…Angie?”

              “No way,” Angie breathed.  She pushed Stan’s arm away and sat on the edge of the bed, next to Fiddleford.  

              “Ang, I mean it, get away from ‘em,” Stan said.  “Who knows what sorta germs are-”

              “Stan.”

              “You’ve gotta be careful, the doctor said-”

              “Stan.”

              “You can’t even handle the lizards at work anymore-”

              “Stan!” Angie yelled.  Stan stopped. Angie gestured at Ford and Fiddleford. “I found our brothers.”

              “Do hormones make ya hallucinate?” Stan said.  “‘Cause those ‘re birds.”

              “Gravity Falls is weird, remember?  There’s magic ‘n mysterious forces what work here.  Is it really that difficult to think that this is Fiddleford ‘n that’s Stanford?”  There was a flash of light.  Angie yelped. Fiddleford rubbed his eyes, trying to clear his vision.  

              “Wait…” Fiddleford whispered.  He stared at his hands.  “I-”

              “No fuckin’ way,” Stan said in a low voice.  Fiddleford looked up.  Stan was carrying Angie, bridal-style, and both were staring at the bed slack-jawed.

              “We’re- we’re human again,” Ford croaked.  

              “And buck naked,” Stan added.  Angie turned red and immediately looked away.  

              “Stan, put me down,” Angie whispered.

              “Sorry, babe, instinct.”  Stan set Angie down.  “Uh, what happened?”

              “I’d like to revisit my earlier question,” Fiddleford said, covering himself with a thoroughly dirty sheet.  “Yer never this fussy over Angie.  Ya know full well she can handle herself.  Why are ya bein’ so careful with her?”

              “Maybe get dressed,” Angie suggested, still looking away determinedly. “We can have a nice long discussion after that.”

              “Great idea,” Stan said.  He turned around and ushered Angie out of the room.  “Meet us outside.  I don’t trust any surface in this house.”

              Angie was eating a banana and Stan was reading a book when Ford and Fiddleford joined them by the Stanleymobile.  Angie swallowed her mouthful of banana.

              “Ain’t ya a sight fer sore eyes?” she said with a smile.  Fiddleford beamed broadly at her.

              “I could say the same about you, sis.”  Fiddleford embraced her tightly.  Stan tossed his book inside the car and separated Fiddleford from Angie.

              “Okay, Fidds, it’s good to see you, but ya haven’t showered forever, and yer huggin’ too hard.  Take a step back.”

              “What?  Stanley, what has gotten into ya?” Fiddleford asked.  Angie sighed.

              “He’s been like this ever since we found out…” she trailed off.

              “Ever since ya found out…” Fiddleford prompted.  Angie waved a hand airily.

              “Never mind that, Fidds.  We’ll get to it.  First, what happened to the two of ya?” she asked.  She took another bite of her banana.

              “We fell victim to an enchantment,” Ford said.  Angie raised an eyebrow.

              “Oh?”

              “There’s an enchantment in place in Gravity Falls, that turns a couple into phoenixes, if there are not currently any phoenixes in the area,” Ford continued.  “I’m not sure why we specifically were targeted, however.”

              “Huh.  That sucks,” Stan said.  He grinned. “But at least now yer back to normal, eh?  Humans.”

              “That…ain’t quite right,” Fiddleford said quietly.  He looked at Ford.  “Go on, tell ‘em.”

              “While we were looking for clothes to put on,” Ford said, “I came across an ancient bestiary I had hidden in the back of the closet.  It detailed some of the specifics of this particular phoenix enchantment.”

              “That’s lucky,” Stan remarked.  Ford nodded.

              “It is.  Now we won’t be surprised when- when we revert back to phoenixes tomorrow.”  Stan and Angie’s jaws dropped.  “Apparently, the enchantment is sort of a riff on a classic were curse.  We can only take a human form during the full moon, but for the rest of the month, we are stuck as phoenixes.”

              “But you two were missin’ fer months,” Angie pointed out.  “Did ya really turn human durin’ that time?”

              “Not once.  The ability to turn human was effectively unlocked after you recognized us, Angie.” Ford smiled weakly at her.  “Thank you for that, by the way.”

              “No problem,” Angie mumbled.  Ford put his hands behind his back.

              “We actually would like to request a favor from the two of you,” Ford said.  “Clearly, we owe you for coming to check on us and allowing us to resume a human form. So we understand if you’re unwilling to do this for us.”               “Yer our brothers,” Stan said.  “If the two of ya need some help, we can handle it.”

              “Thank you,” Ford said.  “While we’re working on getting the house back in order and trying to set things up to accommodate for our…new lives, we would greatly appreciate it if you could stay here to help.”  Stan and Angie exchanged a concerned look.  “What?”

              “Stan should’ve known better ‘n to offer to do it ‘fore ya said what it was,” Angie mumbled.  “We- I’ve got a doctor’s appointment next week.”

              “That’s fine, you can come up after it.”

              “And then I have another one next month,” Angie continued.

              “We can’t just drop everything to move up here,” Stan said.  “We’ve got jobs, and our house and-”  He looked at Angie.  “Should we tell ‘em?”

              “Tell us what?” Fiddleford asked.  He frowned, worried.  “Is somethin’ wrong?”

              “No, not at all,” Angie said.  She squeezed Stan’s hand warmly and smiled at her boyfriend.  “Somethin’s very right.”

              “Did you crazy kids fin’ly get engaged?” Fiddleford said eagerly.

              “Yes, but that’s not what we’re referrin’ to,” Angie said.  

              “Then what could-” Fiddleford started.

              “Stanley, why are you reading a book called Baby Incoming?” Ford asked, peering into the Stanleymobile.

              “Take a wild guess,” Stan said snippily.  

              “Yer expectin’!” Fiddleford squealed.  Stan nodded.  “That explains the doctor’s visits, ‘n bein’ so careful with Angie, ‘n- Angie, ya shouldn’t approach wild animals in yer state!”  Angie threw her hands up in the air.

              “Great, now there’s two of ya to fuss over me like I don’t know how to take care of m’self.”

              “Fiddleford has a point,” Ford said.  “As I understand it, pregnancy reduces the function of the immune system. Wild animals can carry any number of diseases.  It’s irresponsible to risk-”

              “You too, Ford?” Angie said, aghast.  She shook her head.  “I expected better of ya.”

              “But, given the situation, I understand why you’re reluctant to move here,” Ford conceded.

              “What if you moved in with us?” Stan said.  “We can send Lute and Harper up here to clean up the house, get things in order, and in the meantime, you crash at our place.”

              “That’s a good idea,” Angie jumped in.  “I think Stan agrees that it ain’t wise fer ya to be on yer own, and it’d take a while fer Lute and Harper to get here.  Not to mention, they can fix things up faster without keepin’ an eye on you.”

              “Angie, if you ‘n Stan are expectin’, we don’t want to be a bother,” Fiddleford said.

              “Oh, please.  It’ll be no bother.  Maybe you’ll even be able to help around the house, once I start gettin’ big.”

              “They’ll be birds, babe,” Stan said.  Angie shrugged.

              “Birds can pick things up.  I’ll figure somethin’ out.”

[thelastspeecher]

agent-jaselin replied to your post: What would bird Fidds think of tiny baby Molly?...

Stan would be so annoyed. Fidds won’t let Stan in the same room as the egg unsupervised but than will idly kidnap Stan’s baby daughter near constantly. I can’t help but picture Ford having to run interference between the two because they start arguing about it. Molly just wanders off to Ford’s study.

Yesss I love it