#the bittersweet joy when he assures her he doesn’t expect anything more than what they already have & he actually means it

[lemony-snickers]

fellow writers, y’all ever have a scene you’ve written (or drafted in your head) so strongly associated with a song that you cant help but see it play like a movie in your mind when the song comes on?

what’s the song?

[phoebe-delia]

Deja Vu

Angst. MCD x2. Bittersweet ending though, trust me.

"Captirevero"

The spell settled over the Pensieve, causing it to glow for a moment before the light sank into the metal.

Hands shaking, Harry poured the vial into the basin, the cloudy substance stirring with the addition. Once it settled, he took a breath, closed his eyes, and let himself fall.

His younger body feels familiar, but a bit snug, like an old t-shirt that just barely fits but not the way it used to. His hands are in the pockets of his robes as he slowly paces around the Room, restless. He runs a hand through his hair before placing it back into his cavern of fabric, clenching both of his fists and grabbing at the cloth.

Finally, the door creaks open and Draco—he was still 'Malfoy' back then—steps into the room. Harry looks up with a start, forcing himself to stop walking.

He lets the other boy approach him, a wary look on his pale, aristocratic features. Draco swallows nervously.

"Thanks for meeting me," Harry said, hating the way his younger self's voice cracks.

Draco doesn't seem to catch it, or he does he doesn't comment; he just nods. "What did you want to talk about, Potter?"

"I'm sorry. For what happened today."

Draco's jaw clenches. "It's fine. You have to keep appearances, I understand."

Harry shakes his head. "No, Malfoy that's the thing. I didn't expect her to kiss me; I pushed her off a second after you turned away, really. It's my fault for not being clearer with Ginny earlier. It's over between her and me, for good this time, and I'm tired of keeping you a secret."

Something shifts in Draco's eyes; gods, they're just as grey as Harry remembers. "You don't have to do this, Potter," his voice is quiet, unsteady.

Harry feels himself smile softly. He reaches out and takes Draco's smooth hand in his own calloused one. "I know, Draco. I'm doing this because I want to."

And Draco's smile is as blinding as he remembers.

The scene shifts to him struggling to open the door to his flat while simultaneously balancing a large, heavy box in his arms. The aching soreness of his arms is familiar as he blindly reaches for the handle, only to meet resistance and a lock. He fumbles for the key but is unable to reach it properly in his back pocket without losing his grip on the box. Finally, he kicks at the door and calls Draco's name. Merlin, he knows he can't have lost it already. What is taking so long? Harry doesn't remember what's supposed to come next, but he's fairly certain that—

Draco opens the door and nearly runs into Harry, a look of surprise on his face falling into exasperation, laced with fondness. He steps back and lets Harry through, rolling his eyes.

"Harry, honestly, I told you to leave the door open when you got the next box. Why didn't you set it down first and get your key properly, at least?"

Harry puts the box down on the newly set up kitchen table and turns to Draco with a grin. He shrugs. "It was easier my way."

He revels in the familiarity of Draco's derisive, yet heatless scoff. "Merlin, you're impossible."

Harry smirks and walks up to Draco, taking him into his arms before he can protest.

"Mm, yes but I'm your impossible."

Draco gives him a strange look. "What does that even mean?"

Harry shrugs and nuzzles his face into Draco's neck, letting out a contented sigh as the ache in his muscles fades. "I dunno. Like you said, I'm impossible."

Draco huffs and strokes Harry's hair. "Yes, yes you are," he says softly. Harry smiles and closes his eyes.

With each new scene he enters, his nostalgia and joy become increasingly tainted by foreboding. He knows the irony of his smile when he and Draco promise to love one another in sickness and health. He watches the years of dinners and cuddles and bickering and fights. He is surprised by old forgotten jokes and can still recite every word of their favorite stories.

He recalls the terror when Draco is diagnosed and he is helpless to do anything other than hear himself repeat to Draco the same assurances of hope that he knows all too well are doomed. He is forced to watch as Draco lies in the hospital bed, unconscious and kept alive under a stasis spell, his outward self seeming anxious and sick with uncertainty while his inner self awaits the inevitable.

And anticipating the deep and intense sadness of watching Draco's casket get lowered into the ground doesn't make the experience any less painful.

The memory dissolves once again and Harry knows he's drunk.

He remembers this day as if it were yesterday: the dull ache of grief, that a hole had been ripped out of his heart through his chest, and how he'd tried to fill it with firewhiskey. He is sitting in the recliner in the living room and decides he is tired of living in the present.

He stumbles into the bedroom and opens the closet door, revealing the only thing that's been able to give him a reprieve from the pain over the last few months. The Pensieve sits, inviting and beckoning him to take a break from his mourning. And every time it's ended, he's always been more depressed than when he'd started, knowing the breath of air was over and the sensation of drowning would return.

But not this time. After this, he would be drowning no more.

He picks up his wand and casts.

Harry feels a sudden jolt, causing him to stumble back. He is still in his normal body, but this time he's at King's Cross. He waits for the eerie sense of dread to wash over him, but all he feels is peace, contentment. He sees a figure sitting on an otherwise empty bench, and the calm feeling dissolves and is replaced by anticipation twisting in his stomach. He clenches his fists and walks toward the figure, ready to have the confrontation with Albus Dumbledore he'd always craved, but his heart starts pounding as he starts to make out a lithe figure and white-blonde hair.

Despite his disbelief, he jogs toward the bench to confirm his hopes, his worries. His breath catches in his throat when the figure stands and turns piercing, stormy grey eyes at him.

"Hi Harry," Draco says. "Having a stroll down memory lane, are we?"

Harry nods. "Yeah, I...But usually it—wait, what are you doing here?"

"Love, do you know how long you've been here?"

Harry furrows his eyebrows. "Just a few minutes, right?"

Draco presses his lips together. "No, you've been here for the last ten years."

Harry's breathing grows shallow. "T-ten years? Am I...am I dead?"

"Harry, do you remember what happened?"

Harry shook his head. "I thought I was just watching our memories. I do that when I miss you."

Draco gave him a soft smile. "You've been reliving our memories over and over for ten years, love. You cast a spell on the Pensieve to pull all of you in here and to keep yourself in here until you caught up to where you left off. "

"So, I'm not dead, then," Harry knits his eyebrows.

Draco nods. "Correct."

"Then why am I here?"

"Because you have a choice. You see, you used a rare spell that allows the caster three options when the run of memories is over. You may return back to the real world and live out the rest of your life. You can stay in the loop of memories until the end of your natural life. Or you can come beyond the Veil."

Harry's breath catches. "You mean I can—I can go with you, now?"

A gentle smile settles on Draco's lips. "Yes, Harry, you can. If you want to, that is." Draco takes a deep breath, seeming to steel himself. "But you've got to decide."

Harry smiles. "I want to go with you."

Draco's mouth opens slightly in shock. "You don't have to do this for me, Harry, really."

Harry grins. He walks up to Draco and takes a smooth hand in his own. A sense of deja vu washes over him, the sensation welcome and warm.

"I know, Draco," he says. "I'm doing this because I want to."

And Draco's smile is as blinding as he remembers.

[thorne93]

Unforeseen Chasm (Part 66)

Prompt: Two sisters fall for men that are absolute enemies. The love they have could tear all of them apart, or it could bring them together.

Word Count:2518

Warnings: Language, Note: This is by far the longest thing I’ve ever written (including my novels). It’s a collaboration with the amazing @mrs-dragneel-stark-solo​​. It started as a funny “What if…?” and it evolved and got huge. This took two years to write. We are both proud and happy and we hope you enjoy it. It follows from Thor 1 to Endgame in the MCU. Some of the timelines may be off in order to fit certain people, and some characters may show up earlier or in different ways than they have in the movie. But for the most part, it follows the MCU. It also has a bit of crossover with some other Marvel characters throughout the story.

Masterlist for Unforeseen Chasm

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You and Remy were at the Avengers compound now, and as crazy as it seemed, it did feel like home. You’d been gone five years, and yet, this place was exactly the same. The same smells, sights, familiar faces. 

Every Avenger welcomed you with open arms. Something you weren’t used to. Typically at least one or more of them were cautious of you for one reason or another. Perhaps time and distance made the heart grow fonder. Or less people made them start to value your existence more. Whatever it was… it felt good to be here. 

You were wandering around when you saw Bruce, Scott, and Rhodey in a testing chamber of sorts. Tony and Rocket were in full swing getting the time travel platform working, while the rest of the team worked on the suits.

Scott just went through one small test run in a matter of half a second before he came back and said, “Alright. I’m not ready for this.” 

“I am,” you said immediately, speaking up. “I’ll do it.”

“Chere, are you sure?” Remy asked, concern in his voice. 

“Yeah. It’ll be fun. Take a trip and never leave the compound,” you said with a smile before nudging him. It was probably one of five smiles you’d given him in the last five years. 

He gave you a look that said he still wasn’t okay with the idea but Scott was already getting out of the suit and about to hand it to you. You walked off, changed, and returned to the chamber. 

“Now you're gonna feel a little discombobulated from the chronoshift. Don't worry about it,” Bruce explained and you nodded. 

Rhodey stepped up and asked, “Wai-Wait a second, let me ask you something. If we can do this, you know, go back in time, why don't we just find baby Thanos, you know, and…” He made a motion of strangling him.

“I like Rhodey’s idea,” you said, holding your hand up. “I’ll do it.” 

Bruce looked horrified. “First of all, that’s horrible…” 

“It’s Thanos,” Rhodey stated, as if it were obvious and you gave a gesture of agreement to him. 

“And secondly, time doesn't work that way. Changing the past doesn't change the future,” Bruce remarked and you frowned. 

“Look, we go back, we get the stones before Thanos gets them... Thanos doesn't have the stones. Problem solved,” Scott informed. 

“Boom,” you agreed, pointing to Scott with jest. 

“That’s not how it works,” Nebula retorted. 

“Oh, I’m sorry, Tony just invented it, so excuse me for not having the manual,” you said with an eye roll. “But everyone knows that’s how it works.”

“Really? Who says that’s how it works?” Bruce demanded. 

“Star Trek, Terminator, TimeCop, Time After Time --” Rhodey listed.

“Quantum Leap,” Scott added. 

“A Wrinkle in Time, Somewhere in Time,” Rhodey continued.

“Hot Tub Time Machine,” you stated.

“Hot Tub Time Machine. Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. Basically, any movie that deals with time travel,” Rhodey informed. 

“Die Hard? No, it's not one..” Scott said and you frowned at him, wondering where his mind went. 

“I don't know why everyone believes that, but that isn't true. Think about it: If you travel to the past, that past becomes your future. And your former present becomes the past. Which can't now be changed by your new future…” Bruce explained. 

“So you’re saying we just create a new alternate reality every time we time travel?” you asked.

“Exactly,” Nebula said. 

The group got you stepped into the platform that Rocket, Scott, Bruce, and Tony had built. 

“Alright, we’re going to send you to a random day in your past, so you know it’s the past,” Bruce said. 

“I think,” Shannon suddenly said as she entered the room, “she should pick a day. She is the one volunteering her life and time here.” She gave you a wistful smile, and you knew she knew what you wanted. She knew that beyond anything else, you’d want to pick a day with Loki. 

“Alright, Y/N, pick any day,” Bruce said as he looked up at you. 

You thought for a moment, unsure of a good day to go to. Of course you wanted to see Loki, but did you want to see Loki when you first met? When you were in prison? Post prison? And if it was post prison, what day would be good enough? Of course, any day or any second you got to see Loki would be an absolute blessing or miracle but… you didn’t want to waste it, per se. God forbid it was one of the rare days you two fought…

Then it dawned on you. 

“I’d like Christmas day, around 8:00 AM, 2014, please, my apartment,” you softly spoke as you looked to Bruce and then Shannon. She smiled and nodded from just a few feet away from Bruce.

“Got it. Morning of December 25th, 2014.” 

Nebula came up and keyed in something on your suit, checked with Bruce if it was right, and once everything was working, it was time. 

“Okay, Y/N/N, here we go. Going in 3...2...1!” 

Your heart was pounding so fast. From fear, from the expectation. You didn’t know if this would work or kill you. Either way, it would be a sweet gift. 

Suddenly you were falling through space though, small particles, colored webbing. This was insane. It felt like you were weightless, almost as if you were swimming. Then you landed in front of your window, outside your old Manhattan apartment on the balcony. 

It took a second for you to breathe, to get your bearings, and then the helmet went away. You stood up carefully, glancing into the window. 

There it was, the tree, the presents. Everything looked magical and wonderful. Then you came walking into your own living room. You ducked, for some reason nervous about yourself seeing yourself, then you remembered you needed to look. 

“Loki! Come here!” your old self called happily, the joy in your voice evident. Nothing but childlike innocence in your tone. 

“My love? What is it?” you heard in response a few seconds later. The voice of an angel. You stared in, and just behind the sound of the voice, Loki. He stepped into view in the living room. His gaze on your old self. 

“Merry Christmas!” you said loudly as you threw your arms around him. He hugged you back tightly, burrowing his face in the crook of your neck. Happy tears pricked your eyes. You two let go and you handed him a gift. You believed those were some gloves he’d been wanting, and he gave you a necklace you’d been eyeing. 

“Merry Christmas to you too, darling,” he said before kissing you. “This Midgardian custom is quite silly… but I like it,” he admitted with a smile. 

But then, your time machine bracelet began beeping and you were ripped back to present day, almost dry heaving on the platform from the sudden trip. 

Shannon, Scott, Tony, and Remy all came charging up the platform. Remy was by your side instantly.

“Breathe, chere, breathe. You alright?” he asked as he rubbed your back. 

You nodded, standing up. “I’m fine. I’m good.” You looked to Scott and Tony, bittersweet tears filling your eyes. “It worked, it worked.” You nodded vigorously, and they smiled. 

From there, it was just a matter of figuring out where to find the stones. Everyone knew the how worked. It was time to figure out where in space they each might be. Of course, they glanced to you for the mind stone and space stone since you had both.  

It was Natasha that realized three of the stones were in New York at one time. Everyone started volunteering for certain times and places, because they knew of the locations or other aspects. Tony, Steve, and Scott threw their hats in the ring for New York… New York 2012… When you and Loki were invading. Thor was going to Asgard with Rocket, and although you’d love to see your home planet again, when Thor would be there, you and Loki would be on Earth. 

You wanted to help, but you desperately needed to see Loki. In case this didn’t work, you needed every chance to get to him. 

As Steve, Tony, and Shannon were wrapping up their dinner, you went to them, standing in the dining room. It was only the three of them, and it appeared Tony had let the nastiness of what happened with Bucky be a thing of the past. They were all talking, smiling, and having what seemed like a genuine good time for the first time in what you would assume was years for a lot of them. A certain light started to return to their eyes. 

“I, um,” you started, clearing your throat, “I'd like to go with you... To New York.” 

Everyone stopped eating and looked at you. 

“You sure that’s a good idea?” Tony asked.

“I can do it,” you assured them. “I want to help.”

Shannon glanced at the two of them. “I think she can do it. She went back already once, and was fine.”

“I just don’t want her to get there and have a meltdown,” Tony tried to quietly say, but everyone heard him. Truthfully, you didn’t blame him.

You shook your head. “I won’t have a meltdown,” you assured softly. “I can keep it together.”

Steve eyed you up and down for a second. “I think that’d be a good idea. We can use your skill and may need you as a diversion in some cases.”

“If it’s good enough for Cap and the wifey, it’s good enough for me,” Tony said with a wide grin at you. 

“Thank you,” you said with a heavy tone. 

------------------------------------

It was the night before the mission. Everyone needed a good night’s rest and to make peace with what was about to happen. No one could guarantee that no one would be killed in the past, or stuck in the past, or that they’d even get the stone they were going after. 

With that in mind, you made sure to talk to a few people before tomorrow. 

You headed down the guy’s corridor of the tower. You passed Steve’s door, Rhodey’s door, Rocket’s door, until finally, you found Thor’s door. You took a deep breath and knocked. 

You two hadn’t spoken one word to each other since the snap. 

“Come in,” Thor bellowed. 

You pushed the door open and entered. 

“Oh, Y/N. Is everything alright?” 

You shook your head. “No, it’s not.” 

He frowned before patting the bed next to him. He was sitting on the side and you joined him in the dormitory style room. 

“What’s the matter?” he inquired. 

“Thor, I…” You closed your mouth again though. “I’m so sorry for--”

He held up his hand. “Ah, no need, we don’t need to talk about it--”

You took his hand gently, holding it down. “Yes, we do.” 

He stared at you, and you could see his eyes were glassy. “No, you see, we don’t because if we talk about it then--”

“Then we have to face it,” you finished. “I know full well where you’re coming from, Thor. I am so sorry for letting Thanos win the first time. It’s riddled me with regret and grief every day since it happened. You lost a brother, and I lost the love of my life, and between all that, we lost others we cared about. Loki and I couldn’t be there when Frigga died and that tore us both apart. If your mother had never sent me away, we’d have been friends, you and I. We would’ve grown up together. I still remember us playing when we were little.” A smile of fondness came onto your face. “But by some miracle, we found our way back to each other. If the world was perfect, and the snap never happened, you would be my brother in law and it would be an honor.” 

Thor was holding back tears, biting his lip to smile at you. 

“In a way, we’re both at fault for Thanos, and we both aren’t. Besides the immense regret I feel for failing to stop Thanos, I feel regret for losing touch with you and not rebuilding our home, our Asgard. You and Valkyrie were left to pick up the pieces of what Thanos and Hela had done and that wasn’t fair of me, or kind of me, to just abandon you. For that, I am truly sorry. Besides losing Loki, I think losing you was the second hardest thing for me.”

He peered at you before throwing his arms around you in a tight hug, sobbing. 

“I’ve missed you so much,” he sobbed.

You held him back. “I’ve missed you too.” 

After holding each other for a little while more, he pulled away and you said, “Still family?” 

“Always. It’s just as much your fault as mine is for letting the silence happen between us. I just assumed you hated me, after not killing Thanos.”

“But I didn’t either.”

“Yes, but I was closest to him. You were busy saving the others. I had the best chance, and I ruined it.”

“Shh, we’re going to fix it now.” 

“I hope you’re right.” After a moment, in a lighter voice, you asked, “You get to see Frigga tomorrow, are you ready?”

“I’m not so sure. I’m looking forward to seeing her, but…” He couldn’t finish the sentence, but he didn’t need to. 

You squeezed his hand and nodded. “I know, honey. I know.” 

The two of you spoke for a little while longer about the years past, caught up a bit, even laughed a couple of times. When you were done talking to Thor, you headed back to your bedroom, where you Remy was lying in bed reading, waiting for you. 

“There’s my chere,” he greeted warmly. 

You sat on the side of the bed, your face sorrowful.

“What is it, darlin’?” he asked, putting his book on the nightstand. 

“I want you to know how thankful I am that you found me all those years ago. That you stuck by me through… God, everything,” you huffed out with a laugh, bittersweet tears coming to your eyes. “I hope you know I love you,” you said as you reached over and gripped his hand. 

“I know,” he assured with a smile. 

“You deserve so much better than me,” you said, your face falling. “Tomorrow, if something happens--”

“It won’t,” he said firmly.

“If it does,” you stressed, glaring at him, “I want you to know I couldn’t have survived these years without you. I love you so much, and you’re such a big part of my heart and my life. You’re the only thing that kept me sane, let alone alive.” 

“Happy to do it, mon cher,” he assured. “It is always a pleasure.”

He pulled your side of the covers down and patted the bed. You crawled up and curled around him. He kissed your head before softly bidding you goodnight. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tag List: @essie1876​ @magpiegirl80​ @letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked​ @iamwarrenspeace​ @marvel-imagines-yes-please​ @superwholocked527 @missinstantgratification​ @thejemersoninferno​ @rda1989​ @munlis​ @thefridgeismybestie​​ @bubblyanarocks3​​ @igiveupicantthinkofausername​​ @kaliforniacoastalteens​ @feelmyroarrrr​​ @kaelingoat-blog​ @friendlyneighbourhoodweirdo​​ @damalseer​​ @heyitscam99​​ @yknott81​​ @sorryimacrapwriter​​ @glitterquadricorn​​ @xxqueenofisolationxx @little-dis-kaalista-pythonissama @bittersweetunicorm​​ @alyssaj23​​ @sea040561​​ @princess76179​​ @thisismysecrethappyplace​​

@sarahp879​​ @malfoysqueen14​​ @ellallheart​​ @breezy1415​​ @marvelmayo​​ @random-fluffy-pink-unicorn @cocosierra94 @hardcollectionworldtrash @capsmuscles​ @marvelloushamilton @paintballkid711​

Loki: @lostinspace33​​ @ultrarebelheart​​ @lenawiinchester​​ @esoltis280​​ @tngrayson​​ @wangdeasang​​ @harrymewmew @jayfantasyatyourservice​​

UC: @lokis-high-priestess​

[patronihoe]

holy smokes so i uh. i actually wrote something. and finished writing it. hot damn.

Pact with the kobold ending. Patronio brings Hans’s mother a vast fortune and a missive from the new Count Lucanor. But he wasn’t expecting the emotional roller coaster that ensues.

Patronio was ecstatic! His curse was finally lifted and he was finally free! All he had to do was deliver a fortune and a missive to the new counts mother like he had promised.

Before he could leave, though, he had to gather the treasures he would bring. And to do that, Patronio would have to visit one of the few places he had been avoiding since the curse was enacted; the Count Lucanors tomb.

Patronio would have to admit that when the count died, he had grieved, though he looks back on his relationship with the count as a shaky one at best. The count was manipulative, strict, and powerful. But Patronio would be lying if he were to say he hadn’t admired the count to an extent. Despite his flaws he ran his kingdom well. Everyone within Tenebres walls were kept safe from invaders and pestilence, thanks to the counts attentiveness. No, the Count Lucanor was nothing like the fat, lazy kings Patronio had come across in other kingdoms.

And yet here he was. Dread pooling into his stomach as he teleports into the old counts tomb. Of course, after everything hes been through; everything that the count had put him through, at this time all he felt for the man was spite.

As quick as he could, and avoiding looking at the sarcophagus, Patronio formed a pile of treasures in the center of the room. He was a little nervous, because he was about to attempt something he hasn’t tried in a long, long time. Steeling his nerves, just as he was about to teleport with the treasures, he looked up to the large portrait of the Count Lucanor.

"I hope you’re happy, old man. Your legacy will continue, not that you have much of one left." And with that, Patronio and the treasures disappeared.

Where he ended up was a quaint little cottage within a lightly wooded area. Patronio took a moment to breath in the fresh air and admire the tranquility of the place. That is, until a small beast spotted him and started barking.

'This is... a dog right? gosh i don’t think i’ve seen one in hundreds of years! they’re much noisier than i remember!' Patronio mused to himself. 'Well, since my presence is known i might as well be done with this.'

Cautiously slipping past the barking dog, ('he looks friendly enough, its a good sign when their tails wag, right?') Patronio made his way over to the door and knocked three times, then took a few steps back. Not a few seconds passed before the door opened and a young woman stepped out, looking over to Patronio with a rather comically confused expression. Patronio cleared his throat a little to stop himself from laughing at the look she was giving him.

"Milady, please excuse my abrupt approach. The name is Patronio and i happen to bring a gift from the most illustrious Count Lucanor." the young woman approached.

"Count? I’ve never met any count."

"If you will allow me, i would like to deliver this missive myself." Patronio handed over the missive Hans had wrote for her soon after he had sat in the throne.

Hans's mom read the missive, a bittersweet smile on her face. When she had finished, she quietly slipped past Patronio and looked at all the treasure she was given. More than she could ever need.

Patronio figured she was just in shock or speechless with joy because of her newfound fortune, but then he heard her whisper hoarsely; "Hans... will i really never see him again...?"

Patronio whipped around to fully face her as she was crouched over a pile of gold and precious gems.

"Mam...?"

Hans's mother looked up to Patronio, and Patronio had to stop himself from flinching back at the look of grief on the woman's

face, a stream of tears gently running down and soaking into the front of her blouse.

Hans's mom turned back around and stared at the ground, silently grieving.

Patronio didn’t understand. She should be overjoyed! She was now lavishly rich! she could move into her own castle if she wanted to! And yet... Patronio gripped the front of his shirt, his chest filling with a dull ache.

She... misses her son. Her son, Hans, whose only ten years old, but never coming home. And she'll never see her son again... because of him, isn’t it? He was the one who convinced Hans to sit in the throne. He was so selfish... but after nearly a millennia, there was finally a glimmer of hope for him. A chance to finally be free. And so he took it, but at what cost? At the expense of a

young mother and her son. That was the cost.

Hans's mother looked back up to Patronio to thank him after collecting herself but she paused.

"Patronio? Are you okay sir? You look awful pale..."

Shocked out of his reverie Patronio looked back up to Hans's mother, who was now standing before him and looking at him in concern.

"Uh uh i no um milady i’m just fine!" Patronio spluttered then mentally kicked himself for losing his composure.

"Are you sure dear? you’re not looking so well. Maybe you should have a seat and i can get you something to eat."

'Oh, how... motherly...' Patronio thought. The ache in his chest now feeling worse. Before he could respond, Hans's mom practically dragged him inside the house with her and sat him at the kitchen table. Completely taken aback by this new development, all Patronio could do was follow along with it.

While Hans's mom went over to the pot boiling over a fire, Patronio rather awkwardly looked around.

The place was tiny. It was only a one room house, with only one bed. Patronio could hardly believe what he was seeing. When he brought Hans to Tenebre to tackle the trials, he figured he was just fooling another greedy traveler. But seeing Hans's old home... he could hardly blame him for seeking out fortune. It made Patronio feel a little better to consider that Hans's mother now has

her own fortune to do what she wants with. She doesn’t have to live in this sad little shack anymore.

Patronio was once again dragged out of his thoughts when a bowl of steaming soup was placed before him.

"I know its not much... but i hope it helps you feel better."

Patronio looked down to the soup he was offered, but he felt nauseous. Not because of the soup, no, the soup looked and smelled

delicious. But because of the sinking feeling in his gut. It was... guilt, wasn’t it?

Slowly, Patronio took a spoonful and brought it to his mouth. It was the best thing he ever tasted. Surpassing even the most lavish dishes Tenebre had to offer. And he informed Hans's mother of such.

"Aw gosh there’s no need to be so modest, really." She replied, her hand now placed on her cheek at a cute attempt to hide how happy she actually was at the compliment.

Patronio smiled bitterly to himself. This woman was so kind and selfless, and he’s the reason she will never see her son ever again...

Ignoring the pit in his stomach Patronio finished off the soup he was offered and got up from his seat. He bowed deeply towards Hans's mother, despite her protests, and thanked her for her kindness. He turned toward the door but before he could leave, Hans's mom called for him to wait, so he turned back to face her, despite being unable to bare lingering another moment.

"Patronio, thank you so much for everything." Patronio was about to protest but Hans's mom continued.

"If you ever see my son again... tell him i’m so very proud of him. I’m so happy he found what he sought out that night he left home...

i..." Hans's mom started tearing up again and Patronio had to swallow down the lump that was forming in his throat.

"When he left i was just so scared. So scared that he would be attacked by wild animals or, or highway men but-" Hans's mom took a shaky breath. "Thank you. Thank you so much for letting me know he’s safe. That hes not hurt, or scared. But that he got exactly what he wanted." With that, Hans's mother quite unexpectedly pulled Patronio into a hug. Shocked, all Patronio could do was stand stiffly in her embrace. But after a moment he awkwardly returned the hug, gently patting Hans's mom on the back and assuring her it was his pleasure to be of service.

Hans's mom pulled out of the hug but still lightly gripped Patronios shoulders, and gave him a teary, but genuinely happy smile.

"If there’s anything else i can do for you, Patronio, please let me know."

Suddenly Patronios face grew very hot, and his eyes burned with tears. Patronio took Hans's mothers hands from his shoulders and gripped them in his.

"I-i just.." Patronio shut his eyes tight, trying to keep the tears at bay. "I'm just so very sorry that you can’t see your son ever again. It’s... it’s all my fault." Patronio confessed.

Patronio braced himself, expecting some sort of retaliation, but looked back up in shock as he felt a soft hand gently caress his cheek.

"I- i don’t know all the details about... what has happened. but don’t blame yourself for anything, Patronio. As long as Hans is safe, and happy, so am I."

Patronio could not stop the tears that slipped past his eyes and poured down his cheeks. They weren’t the painful tears of guilt, though. They were light tears of relief. All at once the ache in his chest, and the pit in his stomach vanished. He gave Hans's mom a big, tearful smile then stepped back and teleported away. Hans's mom merely stood there in shock for a moment, but then let out an amused huff.

"Now, where ever am i going to put all that treasure?!"

[mrs-dragneel-stark-solo]

Unforseen Chasm (Part 66)

Part 66 of Unforseen Chasm

Prompt: Two sisters fall for men that are absolute enemies. The love they have could tear all of them apart, or it could bring them together. Word Count: 2518 Warnings: Language, Note: This is by far the longest thing I’ve ever written (including my other fic series). first major Collab with my best friend @thorne93​​ what was first a simple “what if” moment turned into a two year writing session and I’ve never been more prouder of myself than when i started my first series. goes through most of the MCU plots there are some changes to accommodate for what we wanted and there is a bit of a crossover between the MCU and other characters. I hope you guys enjoy reading this just as much as I enjoyed writing it.

You and Remy were at the Avengers compound now, and as crazy as it seemed, it did feel like home. You’d been gone five years, and yet, this place was exactly the same. The same smells, sights, familiar faces.

Every Avenger welcomed you with open arms. Something you weren’t used to. Typically at least one or more of them were cautious of you for one reason or another. Perhaps time and distance made the heart grow fonder. Or less people made them start to value your existence more. Whatever it was… it felt good to be here.

You were wandering around when you saw Bruce, Scott, and Rhodey in a testing chamber of sorts. Tony and Rocket were in full swing getting the time travel platform working, while the rest of the team worked on the suits.

Scott just went through one small test run in a matter of half a second before he came back and said, “Alright. I’m not ready for this.”

“I am,” you said immediately, speaking up. “I’ll do it.”

“Chere, are you sure?” Remy asked, concern in his voice.

“Yeah. It’ll be fun. Take a trip and never leave the compound,” you said with a smile before nudging him. It was probably one of five smiles you’d given him in the last five years.

He gave you a look that said he still wasn’t okay with the idea but Scott was already getting out of the suit and about to hand it to you. You walked off, changed, and returned to the chamber.

“Now you're gonna feel a little discombobulated from the chronoshift. Don't worry about it,” Bruce explained and you nodded.

Rhodey stepped up and asked, “Wai-Wait a second, let me ask you something. If we can do this, you know, go back in time, why don't we just find baby Thanos, you know, and…” He made a motion of strangling him.

“I like Rhodey’s idea,” you said, holding your hand up. “I’ll do it.”

Bruce looked horrified. “First of all, that’s horrible…”

“It’s Thanos,” Rhodey stated, as if it were obvious and you gave a gesture of agreement to him.

“And secondly, time doesn't work that way. Changing the past doesn't change the future,” Bruce remarked and you frowned.

“Look, we go back, we get the stones before Thanos gets them... Thanos doesn't have the stones. Problem solved,” Scott informed.

“Boom,” you agreed, pointing to Scott with jest.

“That’s not how it works,” Nebula retorted.

“Oh, I’m sorry, Tony just invented it, so excuse me for not having the manual,” you said with an eye roll. “But everyone knows that’s how it works.”

“Really? Who says that’s how it works?” Bruce demanded.

“Star Trek, Terminator, TimeCop, Time After Time --” Rhodey listed.

“Quantum Leap,” Scott added.

“A Wrinkle in Time, Somewhere in Time,” Rhodey continued.

“Hot Tub Time Machine,” you stated.

“Hot Tub Time Machine. Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. Basically, any movie that deals with time travel,” Rhodey informed.

“Die Hard? No, it's not one..” Scott said and you frowned at him, wondering where his mind went.

“I don't know why everyone believes that, but that isn't true. Think about it: If you travel to the past, that past becomes your future. And your former present becomes the past. Which can't now be changed by your new future…” Bruce explained.

“So you’re saying we just create a new alternate reality every time we time travel?” you asked.

“Exactly,” Nebula said.

The group got you stepped into the platform that Rocket, Scott, Bruce, and Tony had built.

“Alright, we’re going to send you to a random day in your past, so you know it’s the past,” Bruce said.

“I think,” Shannon suddenly said as she entered the room, “she should pick a day. She is the one volunteering her life and time here.” She gave you a wistful smile, and you knew she knew what you wanted. She knew that beyond anything else, you’d want to pick a day with Loki.

“Alright, Y/N, pick any day,” Bruce said as he looked up at you.

You thought for a moment, unsure of a good day to go to. Of course you wanted to see Loki, but did you want to see Loki when you first met? When you were in prison? Post prison? And if it was post prison, what day would be good enough? Of course, any day or any second you got to see Loki would be an absolute blessing or miracle but… you didn’t want to waste it, per se. God forbid it was one of the rare days you two fought…

Then it dawned on you.

“I’d like Christmas day, around 8:00 AM, 2014, please, my apartment,” you softly spoke as you looked to Bruce and then Shannon. She smiled and nodded from just a few feet away from Bruce.

“Got it. Morning of December 25th, 2014.”

Nebula came up and keyed in something on your suit, checked with Bruce if it was right, and once everything was working, it was time.

“Okay, Y/N/N, here we go. Going in 3...2...1!”

Your heart was pounding so fast. From fear, from the expectation. You didn’t know if this would work or kill you. Either way, it would be a sweet gift.

Suddenly you were falling through space though, small particles, colored webbing. This was insane. It felt like you were weightless, almost as if you were swimming. Then you landed in front of your window, outside your old Manhattan apartment on the balcony.

It took a second for you to breathe, to get your bearings, and then the helmet went away. You stood up carefully, glancing into the window.

There it was, the tree, the presents. Everything looked magical and wonderful. Then you came walking into your own living room. You ducked, for some reason nervous about yourself seeing yourself, then you remembered you needed to look.

“Loki! Come here!” your old self called happily, the joy in your voice evident. Nothing but childlike innocence in your tone.

“My love? What is it?” you heard in response a few seconds later. The voice of an angel. You stared in, and just behind the sound of the voice, Loki. He stepped into view in the living room. His gaze on your old self.

“Merry Christmas!” you said loudly as you threw your arms around him. He hugged you back tightly, burrowing his face in the crook of your neck. Happy tears pricked your eyes. You two let go and you handed him a gift. You believed those were some gloves he’d been wanting, and he gave you a necklace you’d been eyeing.

“Merry Christmas to you too, darling,” he said before kissing you. “This Midgardian custom is quite silly… but I like it,” he admitted with a smile.

But then, your time machine bracelet began beeping and you were ripped back to present day, almost dry heaving on the platform from the sudden trip.

Shannon, Scott, Tony, and Remy all came charging up the platform. Remy was by your side instantly.

“Breathe, chere, breathe. You alright?” he asked as he rubbed your back.

You nodded, standing up. “I’m fine. I’m good.” You looked to Scott and Tony, bittersweet tears filling your eyes. “It worked, it worked.” You nodded vigorously, and they smiled.

From there, it was just a matter of figuring out where to find the stones. Everyone knew the how worked. It was time to figure out where in space they each might be. Of course, they glanced to you for the mind stone and space stone since you had both.  

It was Natasha that realized three of the stones were in New York at one time. Everyone started volunteering for certain times and places, because they knew of the locations or other aspects. Tony, Steve, and Scott threw their hats in the ring for New York… New York 2012… When you and Loki were invading. Thor was going to Asgard with Rocket, and although you’d love to see your home planet again, when Thor would be there, you and Loki would be on Earth.

You wanted to help, but you desperately needed to see Loki. In case this didn’t work, you needed every chance to get to him.

As Steve, Tony, and Shannon were wrapping up their dinner, you went to them, standing in the dining room. It was only the three of them, and it appeared Tony had let the nastiness of what happened with Bucky be a thing of the past. They were all talking, smiling, and having what seemed like a genuine good time for the first time in what you would assume was years for a lot of them. A certain light started to return to their eyes.

“I, um,” you started, clearing your throat, “I'd like to go with you... To New York.”

Everyone stopped eating and looked at you.

“You sure that’s a good idea?” Tony asked.

“I can do it,” you assured them. “I want to help.”

Shannon glanced at the two of them. “I think she can do it. She went back already once, and was fine.”

“I just don’t want her to get there and have a meltdown,” Tony tried to quietly say, but everyone heard him. Truthfully, you didn’t blame him.

You shook your head. “I won’t have a meltdown,” you assured softly. “I can keep it together.”

Steve eyed you up and down for a second. “I think that’d be a good idea. We can use your skill and may need you as a diversion in some cases.”

“If it’s good enough for Cap and the wifey, it’s good enough for me,” Tony said with a wide grin at you.

“Thank you,” you said with a heavy tone.

------------------------------------

It was the night before the mission. Everyone needed a good night’s rest and to make peace with what was about to happen. No one could guarantee that no one would be killed in the past, or stuck in the past, or that they’d even get the stone they were going after.

With that in mind, you made sure to talk to a few people before tomorrow.

You headed down the guy’s corridor of the tower. You passed Steve’s door, Rhodey’s door, Rocket’s door, until finally, you found Thor’s door. You took a deep breath and knocked.

You two hadn’t spoken one word to each other since the snap.

“Come in,” Thor bellowed.

You pushed the door open and entered.

“Oh, Y/N. Is everything alright?”

You shook your head. “No, it’s not.”

He frowned before patting the bed next to him. He was sitting on the side and you joined him in the dormitory style room.

“What’s the matter?” he inquired.

“Thor, I…” You closed your mouth again though. “I’m so sorry for--”

He held up his hand. “Ah, no need, we don’t need to talk about it--”

You took his hand gently, holding it down. “Yes, we do.”

He stared at you, and you could see his eyes were glassy. “No, you see, we don’t because if we talk about it then--”

“Then we have to face it,” you finished. “I know full well where you’re coming from, Thor. I am so sorry for letting Thanos win the first time. It’s riddled me with regret and grief every day since it happened. You lost a brother, and I lost the love of my life, and between all that, we lost others we cared about. Loki and I couldn’t be there when Frigga died and that tore us both apart. If your mother had never sent me away, we’d have been friends, you and I. We would’ve grown up together. I still remember us playing when we were little.” A smile of fondness came onto your face. “But by some miracle, we found our way back to each other. If the world was perfect, and the snap never happened, you would be my brother in law and it would be an honor.”

Thor was holding back tears, biting his lip to smile at you.

“In a way, we’re both at fault for Thanos, and we both aren’t. Besides the immense regret I feel for failing to stop Thanos, I feel regret for losing touch with you and not rebuilding our home, our Asgard. You and Valkyrie were left to pick up the pieces of what Thanos and Hela had done and that wasn’t fair of me, or kind of me, to just abandon you. For that, I am truly sorry. Besides losing Loki, I think losing you was the second hardest thing for me.”

He peered at you before throwing his arms around you in a tight hug, sobbing.

“I’ve missed you so much,” he sobbed.

You held him back. “I’ve missed you too.”

After holding each other for a little while more, he pulled away and you said, “Still family?”

“Always. It’s just as much your fault as mine is for letting the silence happen between us. I just assumed you hated me, after not killing Thanos.”

“But I didn’t either.”

“Yes, but I was closest to him. You were busy saving the others. I had the best chance, and I ruined it.”

“Shh, we’re going to fix it now.”

“I hope you’re right.” After a moment, in a lighter voice, you asked, “You get to see Frigga tomorrow, are you ready?”

“I’m not so sure. I’m looking forward to seeing her, but…” He couldn’t finish the sentence, but he didn’t need to.

You squeezed his hand and nodded. “I know, honey. I know.”

The two of you spoke for a little while longer about the years past, caught up a bit, even laughed a couple of times. When you were done talking to Thor, you headed back to your bedroom, where you Remy was lying in bed reading, waiting for you.

“There’s my chere,” he greeted warmly.

You sat on the side of the bed, your face sorrowful.

“What is it, darlin’?” he asked, putting his book on the nightstand.

“I want you to know how thankful I am that you found me all those years ago. That you stuck by me through… God, everything,” you huffed out with a laugh, bittersweet tears coming to your eyes. “I hope you know I love you,” you said as you reached over and gripped his hand.

“I know,” he assured with a smile.

“You deserve so much better than me,” you said, your face falling. “Tomorrow, if something happens--”

“It won’t,” he said firmly.

“If it does,” you stressed, glaring at him, “I want you to know I couldn’t have survived these years without you. I love you so much, and you’re such a big part of my heart and my life. You’re the only thing that kept me sane, let alone alive.”

“Happy to do it, mon cher,” he assured. “It is always a pleasure.”

He pulled your side of the covers down and patted the bed. You crawled up and curled around him. He kissed your head before softly bidding you goodnight.

Unforseen Chasm Tag list- @reigningqueenofwords @oldfreakything @adefectivedetective @dontbetooobvious

Tag list- @cas-you-assbutt-dean-needs-you @winchester-writes @winchesterenthusiast @deansdirtylittlesecretsblog​   @sammysbuttcheek​ @misz-adrii​ @sandlee44​ @womanxofletters​ @natsuccs​ @childishhoebinoo​ @expecteddifferent​ @girl-next-door-writes​ @fanaticfanfiction​ @dakotapaigelove​ @sassy-spn-knight-of-hell​ @reigningqueenofwords​ @oldfreakything​

Marvel: @reigningqueenofwords​ @flowerbunbunny​ @zelda2248​ @misz-adrii​

[carmenlire]

Higher than the Big Trees Ch. 45

read chapter one

read on ao3

Sitting at the desk in front of the room, Magnus studies his students. The room is silent save for a cough here or there, the scuffle of shoes, the jittery click of a pen in the top corner.

His mouth turns up as he hears the first flipping of the page. Taking an idle glance at the clock, he raises a brow. The final for this class was a Blue Book exam and it’s only been five minutes-- either someone really knew their shit or they were bullshitting so hard that he’d need a second red pen when it came time to grade.

Leaning back in his chair, Magnus’s focus turns back to his phone. Alec had been infuriatingly tight-lipped the past couple of weeks about work. Magnus knows that his boyfriend is getting closer and closer to finishing the album but no matter how much he pries-- or what he offers in exchange for a sneak peak-- Alec refuses to let Magnus listen to it.

He’s got to admit that he’s curious. After hearing the single back in September, he’d never said anything to Alec. It seems silly, especially after Florence, but he didn’t want to jinx anything. He didn’t want to be presumptuous only to have Alec give him that blank eyed stare that infuriates him, always accompanied by a slow blink that lets the recipient know exactly how foolish Alec thinks they are.

So, he’d kept his mouth shut but he can’t help but hope. It’s a little heady, the possibility that Alec’s written a song-- several songs, even-- about him. About them.

They’re chatting about plans for tonight and Magnus worries his bottom lip as he reads over Alec’s latest text.

I was thinking we could go out for dinner? I have reservations at Momofuku Ko tonight

Magnus stares down at his phone, mildly appalled.

Darling, that place is expensive hell. It’s a Tuesday night, no need to be so extravagant.

Didn’t you say you wanted to try it? What, I can’t do something nice for my boyfriend?

Fingers flying over his screen, Magnus replies, That was idle conversation, Alexander! Plus, don’t you need reservations at least a month in advance?

He doesn’t even have to wait a minute for Alec’s response.

I might have made them the day after you mentioned wanting to try it.

Rolling his eyes, Magnus’s exasperation is sorely tempered with fondness.

You’re too good to me, Alec

……. So you’re okay with going there for dinner?

Huffing out a laugh that has half his students glancing up at him before turning back to their exams, Magnus grins as he types, As long as you’re okay going dutch.

He actually laughs out loud as he reads Alec’s short reply a few seconds later.

Not a chance in hell, babe.

Shaking his head, Magnus pockets his phone as he looks up at the few dozen students furiously writing in their Blue Books.

Life has settled into a routine that’s mostly what it was before. It’s just that now he has Alec to come home to more often than not.

He still wakes up early and sometimes he lets Alec persuade him to join him at Fuel for an early morning workout. Magnus comes to work and loves what he does and sometimes Alec joins him for lunch.

His day ends and he goes back to the loft where he’ll spend a couple of hours grading or planning or writing-- though not his book, Thank Christ, that’s off to the printer now-- before he meets Alec for a date.

Most nights they spend together and while they alternate between places, it’s usually Alec who comes over to the loft lately.

Magnus doesn’t quite understand it-- Alec’s penthouse is what dreams are made of-- but it’s nice to see Alec so comfortable in his space, among his things.

As his thoughts turn unforgivably sappy, Magnus figures he’s entitled.

It’s his birthday, after all.

Not that he’s told Alec that, of course. Magnus doesn’t know why he hasn’t told his boyfriend that his birthday was coming up, but it had just never seemed the right time.

In any case, he’s not too fond of the day anyway. For the past decade, it’s been little more than a reminder of a childhood he’d tried his damnedest to forget. Until his father was sent to jail, his birthday had always been a big, blowout affair. He’d always had birthday parties and cake and almost too many presents to handle.

His father always took the day off and he let Magnus skip school and they’d spend the day together doing whatever Magnus wanted. When he was very little, there had been mini-golfing and arcades and the zoo. As he’d gotten older, Asmodeus had taken him to the movies, to get his first piercing, and on his sixteenth birthday-- just a few months before his life imploded-- he’d been surprised with a trip to the dealer. Asmodeus had gifted him a brand new Mercedes SUV.

Damn but he’d loved that car, until it had been repossessed at any rate.

No, Magnus reflects. After everything had happened and his father had been sentenced, Magnus had spent a few years flat out not acknowledging his birthday. His foster families hadn’t cared, that was for damned sure, and Magnus hadn’t been close enough with anyone to celebrate.

For a few years, there hadn’t been anything to celebrate, not to him.

But then he’d gone to Yale and had been surprised as hell when Ragnor and Cat had casually left him presents one morning. He still doesn’t know how they figured it out but it had touched him far more than a paperback and an eight dollar bottle of wine should have. They had never made a thing out of it and for that, Magnus was exceedingly grateful.

Still, that doesn’t help matters much now. Magnus feels a little guilty for keeping something so innocuous from Alec, especially after he’d gone to such lengths for his birthday in September, but with a little shrug, Magnus idly thinks about taking Alec out for ice cream after dinner tonight and telling him.

Breaking out of his thoughts, Magnus smiles at the student standing in front of the desk. He’s expecting a question but doesn't say anything when the student merely tosses their exam on the desk between them and turns to leave without a word.

Amused, Magnus looks at the clock and sees that it’s only been half an hour. This exam block was three hours and this class in particular was an upperclass elective on the History of Modern India. Magnus had created the exam and by his estimate, it should take at least an hour and a half.

There are three sections: term identification where there are twenty definitions and students must choose ten to discuss-- people, places, events that were significant to the semester’s content. Then there are the mini-essays where students pick three out of five significant eras and explain why they were so impactful. Finally, they have to pick one out of two essay topics and write an analytical essay that should be comprehensive of the entire semester’s lectures.

The fact that it took this student half an hour makes Magnus wary to say the least.

Shrugging a little, Magnus takes out a few papers from his senior seminar class and starts grading. He’s here for the next two and a half hours so he might as well get some work done. Winter graduation was Saturday and he needs to have grades in for all seniors by Thursday at noon. He has a dozen thirty to forty page theses to grade, in addition to any exams from his other classes. The next few days are going to be round the clock grading and Magnus wryly thinks that finals week isn’t just for the students.

The time goes by quickly and Magnus manages to grade three of the term papers as students slowly turn in their Blue Books and leave, eager to study for their next exam or just collapse in their dorms and relish the end of another semester.

Looking up, Magnus sees that there’s just one student left and she’s on her second Blue Book. Knowing that she has a propensity to take her time and write for ages on each question, Magnus focuses back on grading, marking something in the margin to look up later.

The student takes almost the entire three hours to finish her exam and Magnus sympathizes as he puts his papers in his briefcase to return to later. Shaking out her hand, she places the exam on top of the pile.

“How’d it go,” Magnus asks, capping his pen.

Shrugging a little, Jasmine smiles. “I hope it went well but I guess I’ll just have to wait and see when you enter the grade in Blackboard.”

“Was this your last exam or are you finally free?”

Laughing, Jasmine tosses her hair back as she adjusts her backpack. “You were my last final. I’ve officially done everything I need to for graduation. Now all that’s left is to walk across that stage this weekend.”

Smiling warmly, Magnus reaches for the stack of exams. “I hope Saturday is everything you’ve been hoping for-- graduation is a big deal and you’ve worked hard to get here. What are your plans?”

“I’ve actually been accepted to Cambridge’s graduate program for literature.”

Raising a brow, Magnus offers, “I’m sure Ragnor was thrilled to hear that.”

“Yeah,” Jasmine laughs. “He wrote one of my letters of recommendation. I’m not sure what he said but when I had my interview, they mentioned how effusive Dr. Fell had been.”

“Well, rest assured that Ragnor would only write what he believed. If you’re as good a student in his classes as you are in mine, then that praise was definitely deserved. Congratulations dear and best wishes for the future.”

Grinning, Jasmine gives a silly little salute. “Thanks, Dr. Bane. You’re one of my favorite professors here and I’m glad that I got to take this last class with you before I graduated.”

“Thank you, Jasmine. If you ever need another reference or letter please don’t hesitate to reach out,” he offers and sits back as she turns and exits the room, leaving Magnus alone with his thoughts.

She’d been a great student and a joy to have in class over the past few years. It’s always bittersweet when a student that’s earned Magnus’s respect and fondness leaves for greener pastures but there’s always another one waiting to take their place. Magnus has known and liked dozens of students over the years and some still occasionally email him, updating him on their life and career.

Filing the exams away, Magnus stands. Reaching for his coat, he shrugs it on before swinging his bag on his shoulder. The next exam block is in half an hour and as he exits the room, he sees half a dozen students loitering in the silent hallway, eagerly reviewing notes in a last ditch effort.

It’s cold outside, snow just beginning to lightly fall. He feels his phone vibrate in his pocket and sidesteps away from the main path as he reaches for it. He reads Alec's confirmation of the time for dinner and sees that he has a few hours before they’re to meet at his place.

Walking across campus, the sky is a murky steel gray. Winter has come and with it perennial twilight even though it’s only four in the afternoon.

He finds Ragnor in his office and as he takes off his coat and hangs it up, Magnus sees the cupcake sitting on the desk in front of his usual chair. Arching a brow, Magnus slowly nears the desk.

Ragnor doesn’t look up as he waves a hand between the cupcake and where he’s standing. “It was buy one get one free and you know I like a good deal.”

“I know you’re appallingly thrifty if that’s what you mean,” Magnus retorts as he sits.

Picking the cupcake up, Magnus starts peeling the wax paper away. “Thank you, dear.”

Ruffling the magazine he’s seemingly engrossed in, Ragnor just mutters, “I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Magnus laughs a little, shaking his head as he takes the first bite of the dessert, smiling as he realizes it’s his favorite-- orange cranberry.

Neither one mentions the plastic umbrella in the middle of it, declaring Happy 30th Birthday in colorful, cheerful script. Magnus can just picture it now, his best friend’s long suffering sigh that had accompanied the purchase.

The two of them chat for a little while, talking about syllabi for next semester and plans for the holidays. It’s hard to believe that it’s already December, yet another term under their belts.

Eventually, afternoon gives way to early evening and they leave campus, each going their separate ways. Burying his nose a little deeper into his scarf, Magnus rounds the corner and grins as he looks up and sees a figure walking towards him that he’d recognize anywhere.

Alec places a quick kiss on his forehead and Magnus hears him mutter under his breath, “It’s the only place not covered.”

Unlooping his scarf in the elevator, Magnus pulls him close. He places a kiss under his jaw before moving to his mouth. “Hello, darling,” he murmurs as they pull apart.

“Hey, you,” Alec replies easily and follows him into the loft.

Magnus changes while Alec falls onto the couch, immediately taking out his phone.

“Important business,” he calls out as he walks toward the bedroom.

“Not really,” is Alec’s answer and Magnus enters his closet, running a hand over a dozen blazers, trying to decide on what to wear tonight. He glances over at the end of the closet where a few of Alec’s things are hung. It makes him smile every time he sees the few outfits hanging next to his own clothes and he grins as he looks back at his section, refocusing.

“Is there a dress code,” he yells and hopes Alec can hear him from the living room. He hears a muffled no but he still decides to dress up a little, opting for a crimson button up that he leaves mostly undone, tucking them into black slim cut pants.

Heading towards his vanity, Magnus grabs a makeup wipe, taking off the bit of eyeliner he’d put on that morning. He works on his eyeshadow-- a shimmery gold-- and relines his eyes, opting for something a little more dramatic than he’d worn to work. Dusting highlighter over his cheeks, his hands hover over his jewelry, considering a dozen choices before reaching for the necklace Alec had bought him a few months ago. The pendant rests against his chest, perfectly framed.

Biting his lip, thinking, Magnus reaches for another piece that he hasn’t worn for awhile, slipping it in as he looks at the open door.

Ready, he gives himself a final once over before stepping into a pair of chelsea boots.

When he walks into the living room, Alec’s frowning, rolling his eyes.

“Everything okay?”

Eyes darting up to meet his, Alec hastily shoves his phone into his back pocket, lifting his hips to do so. “Yeah,” he answers. “Just my label being a pain in my ass.”

“So nothing new,” Magnus laughs quietly.

“Nope,” Alec replies, standing up. His eyes darken as he sees Magnus’s outfit.

Magnus stays where he is as Alec comes closer, as he wraps arms around his middle before ducking close and nosing along his throat. “I like this outfit,” Alec whispers.

“Thank you, darling.”

Smile widening, Magnus steadies them both as Alec pulls back to look at his face. “Ready for dinner?”

Nodding, they throw their coats back on and this time it’s Alec who’s leading them downstairs to where a car’s waiting.

Settling in the backseat, Magnus looks out his window as they pull away from the curb, letting his hand rest on Alec’s thigh.

“Have you been to Momofuku Ko before?”

“No,” Alec answers, letting his leg lean against Magnus’s a little more. “I didn’t even know about it until you mentioned seeing a review in the New Yorker.”

Turning his head to look at his boyfriend, Magnus smiles. “Well, then, thank you for making reservations. I hope you like it.”

“It’s, like, fifteen courses, babe. I’m sure I’ll love it. If not we’ll just swing by McDonald’s on the way home.”

Magnus is already looking away when Alec finishes his sentence. Watching the street outside, he does his best not to react. Alec had just just called the loft home. The word wraps around Magnus, warm and happy, and he bites back a grin. It’s silent in the car and Magnus resolutely doesn’t acknowledge Alec’s slip and Alec doesn’t say anything either.

There’s a tension to the silence, like Alec’s waiting for a reprimand, a sharp rebuttal, but Magnus is damned if he’ll give him one.

He does sweep his hand over Alec’s thigh, though, and breathes a little easier when Alec flips his hand over to that he can interlace their fingers.

They stay like that until they get to the restaurant. It’s a small place, only enough seating for a dozen people, and they’re shown to their sets right away.

The next few hours are easy and Magnus enjoys himself immensely. Each course is fantastic with fresh, inventive ingredients and the drinks just keep on coming. He’s pleasantly buzzed by the end of the meal.

The light is low in the restaurant and as he looks over at Alec, his heart squeezes a little painfully in his chest. He’s thirty years old and sharing a wonderful meal-- a lovely night-- with someone he loves.

It’s more than he had last year and more than he figured he’d have this year.

He’s so focused on Alec-- on the way his boyfriend grins over at him before he takes a long drink of wine, the way his hair is a little messy so that his fingers itch to bury themselves in the dark locks, at how thoughtful Alec was to treat him to a dinner he’d wanted to try for ages-- that he doesn’t immediately notice the waiter standing at his side.

When he does, Magnus looks up only to do a double take.

Confusion gives way almost immediately to understanding as a small cake with a lone candle is placed in front of him.

The waiter acknowledges Magnus’s thanks and leaves without another word, leaving Alec and Magnus alone.

Magnus’s gaze is torn between the cake and Alec who’s smiling softly over at him.

“How did you know,” he asks, clearing his throat.

Shrugging, Alec merely offers, “When you found out about my birthday but didn’t tell me yours, I asked Cat. I didn’t want to accidentally miss it. I figured that since you didn’t tell me, you might not want a big deal made so I thought dinner would be a good compromise between too much and at least doing something.”

Reaching over the table, Magnus cups Alec’s cheek, bringing him close for a lingering kiss. “Thank you, Alexander.”

“Happy birthday, Magnus,” is the equally quiet reply and Magnus leans back in his seat as he looks at the cute little cake.

He closes his eyes and for the first time in over ten years, he makes a wish.

When he opens them a few seconds later, it’s to see Alec hastily lowering his phone.

Laughing, Magnus chastises him. “Really,” he asks wryly.

Unrepentant, Alec just says, “It’s your birthday. I’m entitled.”

“You’re entitled--” Magnus starts, mockingly indignant and he feels Alec’s foot nudge his own.

“Eat your cake, babe.”

The first bite is delicious and Magnus hums a little. It’s dark chocolate with a raspberry coulis and he eats almost half before he gives in to Alec’s pleading looks.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” he says brightly. “Did you want a taste, darling?”

He feels heat slink up his spine at the look Alec gives him. “Yeah,” he hears him say and then Alec’s reaching over the table and pulling him close. He kisses him, licking into his mouth, sucking the chocolate off his goddamn tongue.

Magnus might make a noise, he’s not entirely sure, and he brings his free hand up to rest against Alec’s chest, stroking upward until he can curl his fingers into the hair at his nape, pulling him imperceptibly closer.

Alec takes his time, not in any rush to pull away and when he does Magnus whines faintly in protest.

He’s sufficiently distracted and he doesn’t react right away when Alec grabs the spoon from his limp hand and takes a frankly appallingly large bite from his cake.

“This is so good,” Alec mutters and Magnus just stares at him.

“Alexander.”

Alec hums a little as he reaches over and Magnus gives up, pushing the plate towards his boyfriend.

“Don’t you think it’s time we asked for the check.”

With a grin that’s a little too cheeky, Alec looks up from his dessert. “Why,” he asks idly. “Have you got something to do?”

Magnus just sends him an arch look and Alec laughs before getting the waiter’s attention.

Once the bill’s paid, they walk out, holding hands. Alec pulls him close to his side, arm over his shoulders, and Magnus turns his head so that he can kiss the sliver of his wrist that’s exposed to the chilly air.

“I’m sorry I didn’t get you a present,” Alec says, apropos of nothing. “Everything’s been so hectic that--”

Magnus stops him, raising a finger until it hovers over his mouth. “Please, don’t worry about getting me a present. This dinner was more than enough. You’re more than enough on a daily basis, darling.”

“Still,” Alec says, apologetic. “Nothing seemed quite right and I’ve just been so busy--”

Stopping by the car, Magnus pulls him close, cutting him off with a kiss that lingers far too long in the street. When he pulls back, Magnus is pleased to see that Alec doesn’t look capable of arguing with him any longer.

The drive home goes by quickly. Magnus is a little preoccupied as Alec leans into him, spending the ride paying special attention to his neck until Magnus can’t see straight, leaning against his side, head tilted up so that moonlight spills over his face.

The two of them make it to the loft eventually and Alec leads them to the bedroom. Magnus relaxes into red sheets as Alec takes his time undressing him. The whisper of clothing being removed the only sound in the room.

Alec kisses down his chest as he unbuttons the rest of his shirt and when he stops suddenly, it takes Magnus a moment to figure out what must’ve grabbed his attention.

“Like it,” he asks with a lazy grin, widening the space between his legs to make more room for his boyfriend.

“Fuck,” Alec breathes and then Magnus feels Alec continue his path, kissing down his stomach, nibbling across a jutting hipbone before he closes gentle teeth over the piercing at his navel, giving it a slight tug.

Magnus groans, fisting a hand in Alec’s hair, urging him closer, as he lets his hips roll up to where Alec’s stupidly close but still too far away.

Unbuckling his belt, Alec helps Magnus tug off his pants along with his underwear and then Magnus is naked with Alec still fully clothed over him.

He feels the scratch of stubble over the sensitive skin of his inner thigh and he shivers a little as Alec bites down on the muscle there.

He pulls away for a moment and Magnus hears a drawer sliding open before Alec tosses lube and a condom on the bed.

Alec leans close and Magnus wraps a leg over his as they kiss. It’s strange to be so exposed while Alec hasn’t taken anything off but it feels so damned good. When Alec pulls back and urges him to his stomach, Magnus can’t stop the little grin comes over his face.

Wiggling his hips a little, finally getting some friction, Magnus’s breath catches as he hears Alec finally taking his clothes off.

And then there’s a long line of heat over him, pressing Magnus into the mattress. Closing his mouth on the juncture between his neck and shoulder, Alec lets his hands wander down to his ass. Magnus has no idea when Alec managed to coat his fingers with the lube but a slick finger eases inside and Magnus’s hips arch up to Alec as his boyfriend starts opening him with slow, incredibly thorough fingers.

A broken moan spills out of Magnus as Alec pulls his three fingers out, what seems like ages later. Everything’s gone a little hazy at the edges and Magnus rolls his hips up, trying to encourage Alec to keep going as he feels his building orgasm creep out of reach.

“C’mon, darling. You know it’s not fun to tease,” he mutters into his pillow, sagging into the bed when Alec, the sadist, does nothing but laugh.

Magnus tenses up a moment later, though, when he feels Alec’s breath ghost over the small of his back. “But it’s so much fun to tease you,” he replies with a quick nip on his ass.

Alec spreads him, exposing him to cool air and Magnus groans, something low and utterly desperate. “Oh God, Alec.”

He feels the rough pad of a thumb over his hole before Alec’s asking, “This okay?”

“More than,” Magnus gasps, answering almost before Alec’s finished talking. “Please.”

Without wasting any more time, Alec licks across the tight ring of muscle and Magnus swears he goes half blind at the first stroke of his tongue. Alec doesn’t seem in any particular hurry as he eats Magnus out and if Magnus had it in him to care, he’d probably try to tamp down on the noises that wrench out of him as Alec works his tongue into his ass, as he hears the little hungry sounds that escape his boyfriend as he closes his mouth over Magnus’s hole and sucks, as Magnus hears what must be the sounds of Alec working his own cock over, hips rolling into his fist.

Almost without warning, Magnus tips over the edge, hot and sudden. Alec licks him through it, easing up until Magnus collapses into the bed, feeling remarkably like jelly.

Alec kisses a trail up his back, nudging his legs wider apart, and Magnus feels the blunt head of his cock over his sensitive hole. A full body shudder wracks Magnus and his hips jerk up. He moans at the pressure and Alec’s teeth close over his shoulder as he guides himself in, working into Magnus inch by inch.

Sparks shoot up his spine and Magnus gasps a little as he squeezes around Alec’s cock, enjoying the feeling of being so fucking full.

Urging him onto his knees, Alec grips his hips as he pulls back slowly, almost until he’s out, before thrusting back in, in one smooth stroke.

Bracing his hands on the mattress, Magnus meets Alec’s thrusts and before he quite knows it, his second orgasm is hovering at the edges.

Alec drapes himself over his back and Magnus hears his sharp breaths in his ear as Alec hoarsely mutters, “So good, you’re so good. Shit, babe, it’s like you were made for me. Made to take my cock, made to love me.”

“Yes,” Magnus breathes. “Fuck yes, Alexander. I love you so much darling.”

Alec reaches around, wrapping a hand around his cock, moving over him in perfect counterpoint to his thrusts. Magnus comes for a second time as his rhythm falters and then he feels Alec tense against him before he’s groaning long and low in his ear as he comes too.

It takes them awhile to get their breath and distantly Magnus wonders if he’ll ever be able to stand again.

Eventually, though, they do get out of bed. Taking a quick shower before climbing into pajamas and settling on the couch, Magnus turns the tv on to an old movie as they relax in the living room.

Alec’s a comforting weight on top of him and Magnus runs absent fingers through his hair as they watch tv. All around, this is one of the best birthdays he can remember and he knows he owes it all to Alec.

Alec takes out his phone before Magnus hears him scoff.

Stilling his fingers, he asks, “Something wrong?”

“Isabelle just texted me that she’s staying over at Maia’s tonight. Honestly,” Alec continues, “Jace has moved in with Clary and now Isabelle all but told me she’d be moving in with Maia soon.”

“What,” Magnus asks. “Maia and Isabelle are moving in together?”

Lifting up from him a little, Alec leans over him so that he can look at him properly. “Yeah? She told me last week that they’ve been looking up apartments together.”

Magnus’s mind goes into overtime as he considers what Alec’s just told him. He can’t quiet the thought that persists, though, knocking on his head a little too insistently.

“So,” he starts. “It’s just you now? That penthouse must feel pretty empty these days,” he teases.

Alec laughs a little, relaxing until he can brush his nose against Magnus’s throat. “Yeah, you could say that. We’ve lived together so long that it’s definitely going to be an adjustment not to have them there any longer. But they’re both happy and I’m happy for them. It’s definitely for the best.”

It’s quiet for a little while after that. Alec’s presumably focused on the tv, drawing little patters on Magnus’s side with a wandering hand, but Magnus can’t help but think about possibilities.

“Hey, Alec,” he says, breaking the silence.

“Yeah, babe?”

“I think I know what I want for my birthday.”

Straightening, Alec doesn’t stop moving until they’re sitting, facing each other.

“Yeah? Anything,” he promises, grinning.

Clearing his throat, Magnus reaches for Alec’s hand, sweeping a thumb over his knuckles in a little anxious gesture that he doesn’t even realize he’s doing.

“Well, it occurs to me that it might be lonely at your place now that your siblings are moving out. It also occurs to me that we spend almost every night together. If you put those two things together plus the fact that I’m hopelessly in love with you and I hope the conclusion--”

“Is perfect,” Alec says, eyes crinkling at the corners since he’s smiling so big.

“Yeah,” Magnus asks, gaze searching Alec’s. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to or like I’m expecting anything. It’s an offer, nothing more.”

“Magnus, are you kidding me? I love you and you’re right-- for the past few months, I’ve been here more than I’ve been to my own apartment.”

Magnus lets hope catch in his chest as he smiles a little, just a gentle curve of his mouth. “I don’t want you to feel like you’d be giving up anything. I know you love your penthouse and it’s so much nicer than my place. If you wanted to--”

This time Alec pulls him closer for searing kiss that makes his toes curl against the carpet. Magnus’s breathing is a little unsteady when they break apart a few moments later.

Resting his forehead against Magnus’s, Alec speaks in the space between their lips. “I’d love to move in with you, babe. While I like my apartment, it’s just a place. Especially now that Jace and Iz won’t be there, it doesn’t really hold anything important. Here, though? This is a home.”

“Our home,” Magnus whispers, looking up to meet Alec’s eyes. “If you want.”

“I love you, Magnus. I can’t think of anything I’d love more than moving in together. As long as you’re sure.”

“I’m sure,” Magnus says, no hesitation. He laughs a little, nosing along Alec’s wrist. “Half your shit’s already here anyway.”

Alec laughs too before he leans forward. Magnus lets himself fall back on the couch. They spend the rest of the evening talking about plans and Magnus can’t remember ever feeling so sure of a decision.

Magnus reaches out, frowning when his hand hits something. Blinking open bleary eyes, he lifts up to an elbow looking at where Alec should be.

Instead, he finds a note taped to something. Sighing a little, Magnus sits up and reaches for whatever it is.

Pulling the note from where it’s taped to what Magnus now sees is a CD in a plain, clear case, he reads the note.

Magnus,

Happy birthday. Did you really think I didn’t get you anything?

P.S. You’re the only person outside of the production team that’s heard this. Management tried their damnedest to talk me out of this but I want you to have first access. You deserve to know the truth and know that I mean every word.

P.P.S. I love you, so much. I hope these songs remind you of that every time you listen to them.

--Alec

Suddenly wide awake, Magnus picks up the innocuous cd. He turns it over but the only thing that’s scrawled on the cover is Album 7-- Feel Something.

He throws the covers off and spends ten minutes running around his apartment looking for a goddamned cd player before he remembers that it’s 2018 and he hasn’t had one of those in a damn decade.

Remembering his laptop, Magnus hurries to his study, wearing just his boxers, as he slides the cd in.

Almost immediately the first song starts playing-- he's a little surprised to see that there are nineteen tracks in all-- and Magnus lets the notes drift over him, turning the volume up to its maximum.

He sits in his chair, closing his eyes as Alec’s voice comes through the speakers. It’s presumably the title track, the single he’d heard back in September. It’s familiar and it makes him smile, emotion clinging to him now that he has irrevocable knowledge that this song was about them.

It wraps around his heart. It fills him with love and he wonders how the hell he got so lucky.

There are songs that make him a little hot under his collar like Black Magic and Crazy in Love and I’ve Never Loved This Hard This Fast Before. There are a few songs that make Magnus wonder at the Alec whose on tour like Better Man and Life of the Party and The Way I Am. He makes them both a silent promise that he won’t let tour come between them whenever the time comes.

There’s a song or two that makes tears threaten to well up like Worship or I Like Me Better or Wanna Be Missed.

He listens to the album once through and then another. He lets the music sink into him and he knows he’s smiling too much, a stupid grin on his face, but he can’t help it.

Most of him that can’t believe that Alec trusted him enough to give him unfettered access to his album. He can’t believe Alec bared his heart to him. Magnus knows Alec’s music is so incredibly personal to him and he doesn’t take this privilege for granted.

God, he loves this man.

After listening through it twice, Magnus puts it on shuffle as he leaves his study. He goes back to the bedroom and picks up his phone from where it’d been charging overnight.

Unlocking it, he swipes over Alec’s contact information and brings it up to his ear. It only rings twice before he hears Alec’s voice, warm in his ear.

“So? What’s the verdict?”

Laughing, Magnus wanders over to his window, idly watching the people down below.

“You have to know I loved it, Alexander. Thank you,” he says quietly. “I never expected you to let me have early access to the album.”

“It’s only fair since the whole damned thing is about you,” Alec replies wryly. There’s a beat of silence before he tentatively asks, “It’s okay? It’s not too much?”

Shaking his head even though Alec can’t see him, Magnus’s answer is honest as he says, “It’s perfect.”

Alec laughs a little. “Even track 8?”

Narrowing his eyes a little, Magnus goes back to his office, moving his mouse hurriedly to wake the screen up as he scans the track list. When he realizes what song Alec’s talking about, he barks out a laugh.

“Don’t get me wrong, it is explicit,” Magnus eventually says. His voice is low as he adds, “But by all means, darling, if that’s how I make you feel.”

Alec clears his throat. “Every word,” he murmurs.

Running a hand through his hair, Magnus tugs on the strands a little, trying to clear his head.

Conversation drifts to other things after a few more minutes, though Magnus knows that they’ll be talking about this tonight. He has a hundred and one questions he wants to ask-- when did Alec start writing about him? How is it possible that he can make Alec Lightwood feel so much?-- but he wants to do it in person.

Hanging up after their routine I Love Yous, Magnus heads to the shower.

Work stops for no man, no matter how much he might just want to sit and listen to his boyfriend’s album that’s all about him. Magnus spends most of the day on cloud nine as he works through papers and exams and entering grades online, all the while thinking about how to show Alec just how appreciative he is of his artistic talents.

For some reason, he thinks with a smile, grading isn’t quite as tedious as it usually is, not when he has Alec in his ears and in his head.

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

CSUARAGC PRT 11 START

Keith breathed a sigh of relief when Christmas Day was finally over. Krolia had integrated herself in to Lance's family almost seamlessly, spending most of dinner talking with Miriam over the dishes served for dinner. Even before that she'd joined in on the games the kids of Lance's relatives were playing, causing bittersweet feelings to blossom over what he could have had and never had with her. Lance was smiling and laughing, he seemed so much happier then when Keith had left for the afternoon with Krolia as their little group picked into the lunch leftovers, still somewhat stuffed from lunch. She even passed the tick of approval from Lance's grandparents. They'd both liked Keith well enough, giving him a 10 pesos note and a wink like his husband had said they would. Keith even got a pinch on the arse from Lance's grandmother. It'd been years since they'd visited his father's grave, only one since Earth had been liberated and that had been in the early days. Despite the downfall of the Galra, time had slipped through their fingers and they'd wound up leaving his father resting there all alone for far too long. Krolia knew what Christmases had been like due to their time on the space whale, but this was only their second time celebrating the holiday since being reunited. As much as he'd been hurt by Lance insisting that he went off with his mother, he'd needed time with her more than he knew. Maybe it was because it was Christmas that he needed her in a whole other way. Sitting at his father's grave, he felt a little stupid talking to the headstone about Lance and all Lance had done for him... yet, he still promised his father he'd bring his husband to visit soon.

  When they finally climbed into bed for the night, Lance was shy as he inched towards him, Keith quick to give the Cuban the reassurance he needed. He had so many questions and no idea where to start, his fingers running along the thin gold chain around his husband's neck. He'd bought it so Lance had somewhere to keep his "wedding ring", that wasn't where his little finger had been. Keith had intended to find hid something more fitting of his lover, yet nothing screamed Lance at him and he wasn't about to settle for second best. He wasn't like Lance. He wasn't sure on his gifts. He didn't know exactly what to buy everything one. Lance had brought joy to their whole family unit with his gifts, Keith had brought rolled eyes with weapon related gifts. He'd bought his husband enough clothes and blankets to last until he was compelled into his next spoil session. He'd picked up various face creams for his husband, but had no idea if Lance liked them already had them. Lance had access to more technology and weaponry than he did. All the really cool things... Leaving him behind all over again.

  "I can hear you thinking"

Nuzzling his cheek against Keith's chest, Lance's hand gripping his hip fractionally tighter. He'd seemed so scared in front of Krolia. Lance was trying to hide his emotions but his scent had said it all. The Cuban was shaken and pushing him away, throwing the walls up that Keith had thought they'd broken through

"Who did you call?"

That wasn't the question he was going to ask... It was the question he'd wanted to ask, yet intended to ease into once he figured out what he wanted to say

"My therapist"

That wasn't what he expected. He'd been angry that Lance had chosen to make the phone call rather than come with him and Krolia... those feelings might have passed, but for Lance to call his therapist on Christmas Day

"It's my fault isn't it? Because I left? I didn't..."

"Babe, no"

"You called your therapist..."

He was happy Lance seemed to have found someone... but again, Christmas Day. For Lance it was a special day, for him it brought back the memories of being locked away hungry, or hit for asking for something as small as a glass of water or new pens for school

"I called my therapist because I needed help"

Lance had talked to his therapist maybe twice? Yet he'd turned to them instead of him

"I should have..."

"No"

"You don't even know what I was going to say"

"You were going to say you should have helped. Shiro explained things to me... I thought... I wanted to give you new memories. I know you I can't take your pain away, but I wanted to give you good memories. It was also why I was going to suggest you go out with Shiro for a bit... Seeing your mum made me feel guilty. About me and my past... because your mum like knows. So I called my therapist. Erathus kind of has Christmas, it's not holiday though... I managed to get through, well I had to wait for them to return my call. I wanted to call them when my head was so messed up because I'm still trying to be better. I didn't mean to be rude to your mum"

  Lance's honest answer tugged hard on his heart. His husband was trying so hard and he'd dared to be mad. Rubbing his back, he resisted the urge to kiss the top of Lance's head

"I'm really proud of you. Today was... all over the place. I can't believe it was only 24 hours long"

"Christmas is a mission of its own. For the record, I do like your mum. My head went stupid places because I was confused. I shouldn't have acted like that"

"You're fine. I was mad... I didn't get why you didn't come with us, until after we were at dad's grave"

"Christmas is... Christmas isn't always good for people... sometimes it's just another day. I thought you needed your mum, like I needed my mum today. I don't know if that makes sense. I'm really sleepy"

  They were all really sleepy. Keith and Lance had both been leaning heavily on each other as they stumbled back to their bedroom. Once again going to kiss Lance's hair, he forced himself to stop all over again

"It was our second Christmas together that I can remember. We didn't do anything on Daibazaal. I think we were both working and didn't realise until after"

"I remember. We had a group call. I missed it, then called you back on Boxing Day so you wouldn't think anything was wrong. I know it's probably awful to say, but I'm glad Hunk and Pidge didn't come today"

Talking of Pidge, he was reminded that she'd sent a present care of Veronica

"Pidge sent a gift. Hunk said he and Shay would be dropping by when they could"

"Do you know what was in that box? It was that damn finger she mentioned... I don't know how to tell her I don't want it"

Lance's mottled left hand didn't bother him. He hated that he'd been hurt the way he had, yet was grateful that they hadn't taken the whole hand. While he didn't hate it, he knew his husband felt differently. That's why it was constantly hidden

"You don't?"

"My hand looks like a freak show as it is, it doesn't need a creepy alien finger attached"

"It doesn't look like a freak show. You don't have to use the finger if you don't want. I love you, either way. You know that, don't you?"

"Yeah... I love you too. Let's just go to sleep?"

"Sounds good babe"

"I feel like I could sleep for a phoeb"

"You're not the only on, but I promised dad we'd visit soon"

"I'd like that... mmm, sorry, I'm falling asleep"

"You just sleep. I'm not going anywhere"

"I apologise now for any nightmares"

"Babe, you don't need to apologise"

"Want to... now go to sleep. I'm drooling"

Keith wasn't sure what Lance's drooling had to do with anything, yet with Lance already nearly asleep he didn't ask. They had tomorrow to talk. They had the rest of their lives to talk. Tonight he was going to sleep like the absolute dead.

      *

Keith had no idea how time had passed so fast between Christmas and New Year's Eve. Two days after Christmas their teams had come for a fly out to his old shack, then he and Lance had visited his father's grave from there, yet with that being pretty much they only thing they'd done, somehow the week had vanished before he knew it. There'd been chores to do, Lance proving to be more help than he was as they worked on Jorge's tractor. A new group of aliens came in to work as farmhands for the fruiting junipers, and Kalternecker had escaped her pen, but that was seriously all that happened.

  It was alarming how fast he'd grown used to doing next to nothing around the farm. Sure, he pitched in where he could, but it wasn't the same as flying all over the place on missions. All of them were brimming with extra energy. His team taking on training Daehra and Lucteal in protective hand to hand moves. Lance wasn't allowed to join given he had a seizure out of nowhere in the middle of the night, then another the following morning. His husband assured him he was fine, if not sleepy, Daehra forced awake in the middle of the night to run scans on the stubborn Cuban. Her best guess was it was the release of stress now that Christmas had passed, coupled with Lance messing with his medication schedule. All Keith could be grateful for was that neither seizure had happened at the house, and that they hadn't been caused by Lance overdosing. Christmas had been shaky in the middle, but looking back on it, he'd never felt as happy, loved or content as he had on the day itself. Lance had a slightly different view though, thanks to his anxieties, which was hard on both of them as his husband took all of Boxing Day to truly bounce back from the previous day. He hadn't wanted to leave their bed, tearfully apologising for his depression. He loved his husband and loved the fact he'd tried so hard for the sake of everyone there, so they'd spent the day tangled up in their blankets together, Keith placing his game while Lance alternated between napping and simply watching him play, occasionally throwing in a suggestion when Keith got stuck, but for the most part he let the half-Galra work things out for himself.

  With the Garrison's New Year's party looming, and Shiro's smaller New Year's part looming, Keith wasn't looking forward to either. He didn't want to make an appearance at the Garrison, he'd said so as much, yet the invitations had already promised that the Voltron Paladins would be present... yet Lance hadn't mentioned the party at all. Out of fear that his husband hadn't been invited, Keith didn't mention it either. If Lance wasn't going, then he wasn't going, and if they'd forgotten to invite his husband it was safe for everyone that he didn't. He wasn't above blowing up some smaller unstaffed storage areas of the complex in retaliation for hurting Lance's feelings by forgetting him. His husband was the most gentle and loving person known to mankind when he wasn't being a dick, and although they'd agreed that they'd spend the next deca-phoeb transitioning jobs, Keith didn't want to go back to work and leave his husband to wake up alone. Waking up with Lance was special. The times he's woke before his husband even more so as it allowed him time to study his husband without being self conscious. He loved the way Lance's eyelashes were stupidly long, and the way his lips would twitch then form a smile when Keith would whisper how much he loved him. He loved that Lance felt secure and safe enough to remain sleeping in his hold, trusting him to keep him safe. He loved the way Lance's collarbone would peek out from under their blankets... He was stupidly in love with Lance, and with their impending separation, he loved all these small moments even more. His husband might not be perfect to everyone else, but to him, he was his everything.

   With Veronica and Acxa doing the chores, they were allowed the luxury of sleeping in on New Year's Eve. They'd stayed up the previous night playing card games, where Lance had shown he was amazing when it came to basic card tricks and sleight of hand. Actually, Rachel, Marco, Lance and Veronica had all been. There was some kind of sibling rivalry at play where they took particular delight in destroying each other, so Keith, Tobias, Acxa, Zethrid and Ezor had formed a team against them. Tobias dealing the crushing blow that had taken Veronica out of the game. For a man who he'd never really interacted with, it was refreshing to see Tobias opening up to them. He'd been so sure the man was an Altean in disguse, yet it seemed like Tobias simply enjoyed the antics of Lance's team and remained because of that. Next to fall to him was Lance, then Marco and Rachel had ganged up against them. It all came to a draw when Rachel spilt her drink, in a move Keith was sure was deliberate, all over the kitchen table. Calling it a night there, they realised it was already well into the Early hours of the morning. Waking a little after 9, Lance slept through until 9:30, his husband nosing at his chest until Keith finally paid attention to him. Spending the next half hour sharing small kisses and checking their comms, Lance sent him off to shower first. They'd stopped showering together for the moment, due to Keith accidentally picking up on Lance's discomfort through his scent. He loved the physical intimacy of touching Lance as they showered, but it wasn't what kept him in the relationship. He didn't need the physical stuff. His heart belonged to Lance and that was all he needed to know. When he'd returned from showering he found Lance had been busy. A bag packed and sitting by the edge of their bed. Board shorts, a black singlet, cap and sunnies and sunscreen sat on his side of their bed. He knew going to the beach had been on the plans, except he thought it would be later. Kissing him on the cheek Lance disappeared to shower, returning wearing a long sleeve rashy and boardies. His gloves didn't look quite so weird against the dark blue and black of rash shirt... though Keith was sure that someone was bound to point out that people didn't usually wear gloves to the beach. In an act of silent support, Keith donned his fingerless gloves. It was only by some miracle that they'd survived as long as they had, though with his constant want to touch Lance skin to skin, they hadn't been warm a lot lately.

   Grouping at the house, the next problem was that Deahra, Zethrid and Ezor all needed swimwear. Zak was refusing to leave the Telula since he was on a roll with his coding, while Lucteal had borrowed a pair of boardshorts and a shirt from Lance, and Tobias was gifted the same in an old set of Luis's. Not being a girl, Keith didn't understand why the girls couldn't borrow a swim suit or two from Veronica and Rachel. Daehra seemed to be around the same dimensions as Rachel, though she always had most of her body covered... Then again, he wasn't sure he wanted to share any of his underwear... maybe with Lance? If they were clean then what was the problem?... but girl's bodies did other things, and Acxa was wearing one of Veronica's bikinis... Did that make it a couple thing? Or did the others simply want their own swimsuits? Girls would always be a mystery to him... Keith continued to mull through the problem, even as Miriam refused to let them out the house without applying sunscreen, leaving him forces to endure Marco squirting far too much on his pale skin. He couldn't help having fair skin, and in his defence, Zak was the palest of all of them, but without the man there his argument only drew laughter from Lance who was allowed to go ahead and load up the old truck because he'd had the foresight to apply it. There'd be no exaggeration to say that Keith had a few choice words he wanted to say to his husband about not prewarning them in the safety of their bedroom. When they finally got out of the house, Rachel declared she was taking the others shopping so Lance needed to drop them off first, and that they didn't need to worry about paying because Miriam had given her money for the swimsuits. Being Lance, he scolded his sister, then promptly made them all wait while he transferred GAC over into his sister's account and took the cash she had on her, muttering something about how Rachel couldn't be trusted not to blow it all at once or to not waste their families money. Keith already knew Lance was sending GAC home to support the farm, with Christmas and now New Years, it hurt to think that maybe Lance's family were in financial trouble with all the presents they'd gifted this year. Miriam's gift to him had been a black jacket Lance had told his mother to buy him and a copy of the photo the woman had taken where Lance was sleeping on him in the living room, placed in a nice gold coloured frame. He'd also found that his own photo had made it up on the family wall of photographs, in addition to photos of their teams from Christmas. The half-Galra had to give the woman credit, she worked fast. He didn't even know she'd gone out, let alone gone out, had the photos printed, then framed and hung all within the last week.

[katdvs]

Lucas Friar moved back to Texas at 17, now he’s running for Mayor of Rosewood Springs so best friend Zay and little sister Gigi decide he needs a little help from a political consultant.

Riley Matthews found her calling, she found a fiancé, but she never expected to find herself here, of all places.

Cross-posted to FF.net | Soundtrack

-the moon that moves your tides- | -basics of you and me- | -rather hurt than feel nothing at all- | -taste of love oh bittersweet- | -time to face my weakness- | -you do what you do- | -a place you belong- | -the one I want for life- | -find a reason-

Author Note: I meant to get this done yesterday, but stuff happened and I ended up taking my laptop apart to fix it, but hey it seems to be working now so yay! Tonight (Saturday) is your last chance to enter the fanfic giveaway on tumblr, so if you do that would be awesome. You guys rock, xoxo.

-show me the way-

“Yee-haw” Lucas hooted when he entered the barn where Zay had just ended a phone call.

Zay stared at his best friend, “Not the reaction I was expecting. Actually, I don’t know what to expect.”

Lucas grabbed Zay by the shoulders, “Riley is going to stay until at least after the election.”

“At least?” Zay noted the way his green eyes seemed brighter than they had in a very long time. “After the election if you win or lose she’s gone, she goes back to New York where she’ll plan her wedding to Dave after giving him hell for getting her that cheap as shit ring.”

“No” Lucas pointed to Zay as he backed away practically skipping, the smile on his face growing, “No, she is not going to marry Corn Chip Dave. He doesn’t deserve her, no she’s not pulled to him.”

Zay rubbed his eyes with his fingers before pinching the bridge of his nose, “Okay, I’m missing something so spill.”

“If Riley and I aren’t together by the end of this, then we don’t belong together, maybe I’m meant to be a piece of shit guy just getting blowjobs from random women and the occasional one night stand.” Lucas looked around the bar, “But no; I am meant to be with Riley Matthews, she was brought back into my life for a fucking reason Zay.”

“Yeah to get you elected mayor.” Zay shook his head, “I called Smackle to arrange this.”

“Of course, you did, but still, this is all happening for a reason Zay.” Lucas ran his hand through his hair, “After all this time seeing her again, it’ still there Zay, it’s even more intense now, God last night I could’ve kissed her.”

“She’s engaged.”

“For now,” Lucas shrugged, “you didn’t feel the way she claimed me in front of Dixie, that’s what she did Zay. That wasn’t some political move Zay, she was telling Dixie that I’m hers.”

“Follow her lead” Zay warned, “Don’t make a move on her first, don’t scare her away. She is engaged and its Riley, even if she was claiming you in front of Dixie. Don’t break her heart again.”

“I would never break Riley’s heart.” Lucas reminded his best friend, of course he meant it, not realizing that he had in the past.

“Seriously Lucas, I will beat the living life out of you if you break her heart, if you do anything that would hurt her. This isn’t a game, this is her heart and yours.” Zay warned him, “This isn’t about fulfilling some sex fantasy you have. If it’s possible that you and Riley have a future this is about the two of you loving each other, building a life together, possibly having children together. You need to find out if that’s even something the both of you want. But hey you’ve got until November.”

Lucas nodded knowing that Zay was right, he couldn’t push it, that this was so much more than anything he was used to now. Things with Riley always had been, they were more, in ways he wasn’t sure he could ever describe.

Maya had just gotten off the phone with Zay and was sitting down on her couch when her phone sang with Riley’s ring gone, “Hey Honey, what’s up.”

“I did something really stupid Maya, like really stupid. I can’t even believe I did it.”

Maya looked around even though she knew Charlie wasn’t home she still felt the need to check, “Did you have sex with Lucas?”

“No” Riley breathed, “I um, I kind of went and staked my claim on him.”

“What did you do?” Maya stood up pacing around, knowing her husband was due home any minute and he might just have Dave with him.

“We were at church, it was after the service. Lucas was mingling and talking to Dixie Carmichael, one of those girls in those pictures all those years ago, oh you should’ve seen the way she looked at Lucas. She looked as if given the chance she would strip him naked, dip him in chocolate and lick every inch of him.”

“And you of course have never thought about doing that.” Maya smirked to herself as she moved to the kitchen raking out a few items from the fridge to make a sandwich.

“Maya,” Riley ignored the comment, “I moved across the social hall, slid right up to Lucas, put my arm around him and said I was his girlfriend and sticking around. Then I kissed him.”

“It was good, wasn’t it?” She couldn’t believe after all these years these two were still such fools.

“Yes, and it was brief, part of me just wants to walk up to him and kiss him again, let whatever happens, happen.”

Maya shook her head, “Have you told Dave what you’re up to?”

“Not exactly, there’s more Maya.”

“What else could there be?”

“Well I kind of have to stick around and be his girlfriend publicly since you know it wouldn’t look good if he makes his run for mayor and I run back off to New York.”

Maya quickly pumped her fist in the air in joy, “So you have to stay until after the election huh, okay I’ll um go by your place later today get you some more Texas friendly clothes, anything else you want me to get for you?”

Riley sighed, “I don’t know, anything you see in my room you think I might need over the next few months. For sure though, please send me some of my cotton tank tops, it’s getting hotter here each day.”

“I will, so crazy question, what are you going to tell Dave?”

“I don’t know, just that this is a complicated small town situation, that I need to be here, be hands on, and if I can get away for a weekend or a couple of days I’ll come back to New York, but right now I need to be in Texas.”

Maya was smirking as she finished making a sandwich, “Okay, sounds like a plan, just text me the address to send your stuff to and I’ll have it sent as quickly as possible.”

“Thank you, I should go see if Gigi needs help with lunch and then help Lucas with his wardrobe.”

“Riley, you’re playing with fire, don’t get burned.”

“I know what I��m doing.” Riley assured her friend, “Thank you and bye.”

“Bye” Maya watched as the call ended on her screen, “Yeah you’ll be crying out yee-haw before you know it.”

The door opened, Charlie came in with their two children following behind, but quickly running to their own room, “Maya guess who is officially going to be Dave’s best man when he and Riley get married in November.”

“They haven’t set a date yet.” Maya reminded her husband, “And she’s currently busy working on a new campaign.”

“Dave set a date, he talked to a wedding planner.” Charlie tried to grab the sandwich and Maya swatted his hand.

“He’s counting his chickens before they hatch, Riley is going to want to plan her own wedding.”

“He’s doing this to help her.” Charlie grabbed an apple from the counter, “He knows how busy she is, and that sometimes she can’t get back to New York to make the plans she needs to.”

“Great he can get her a wedding band she’s allergic to as well.” Maya muttered.

Charlie either didn’t hear her or decided to ignore it for whatever reason, “Oh, you should see his new boat Maya, it’s more like a mini yacht. It’s sick, it’s beautiful, and it has bedrooms, so one weekend we can leave the kids with my Mom and go sailing with Dave and Riley for an overnight.”

Maya stopped what she was doing, “He bought a new boat?” huh probably where the money he was going to spend on a ring went, “What did he name it?”

Charlie chuckled, “Tostitos, he thinks its good luck to name it after his favorite chips.”

“I have to run an errand, actually it’s for Riley.” She grabbed half the sandwich, “I’ll be back in a few hours.”

“What does Riley need you to do?” Charlie picked up the half she left behind.

Maya grabbed her purse and was already at the door when she looked back to her husband, “She wanted me to send her a few things since she doesn’t know when she’ll be back in the city.”

“Where the hell is she?” He took a bite of the sandwich as he watched his wife at the door.

“Riley is exactly where she needs to be.” She left the apartment, wondering more and more why her best friend had ever accepted Dave’s proposal in the first place, and what she could do to help her friend make the right decision about her future.

If what Zay had told her was true, right now it was possible that the only thing really holding Riley and Lucas back, was Dave being her fiancé.

An idea hit, Maya knew she would probably get yelled at for what she was about to do, but Riley needed a push, and maybe if she was lucky it would give Lucas the push as well.

“Gigi is a great cook.” Riley told Lucas as they stood outside his bedroom, the air thick with nervous energy, as if she would cross the threshold and all semblance of self-control would be gone.

Lucas nodded, “She is, she’s actually been pretty helpful to have around.” He opened the door, “So where should we start?”

“Um, well what’s an average day like for you, like what do you wear?” She stayed near the door afraid to really enter his room.

“Jeans, a t-shirt and a plaid button up over it. I usually do some work here at the ranch with our animals, and then I go check my schedule, make house calls in the morning before going to the office to see the smaller animals.” He looked to her with a soft smile, “Riley, you can come in here.”

“And you wore almost a full suit for church.” She took a couple of steps in, his room, his sanctuary, his bed.

“Well we’re not fancy like in the city.” He watched her, “I have suits of course, mostly for conferences, weddings, the bachelor auction.”

“If they have a good fit, you should be fine. Um ties, are they in this drawer?” Riley started to pull his sock drawer open.

“No” Lucas dashed across the room, “That’s um socks.”

“Oh sorry” she tried to read him, but she was sure she saw a panic wash over him, that couldn’t be possible.

“Ties are in the closet, sorry if I scared you.”

Riley reached up, her thumb rubbing over his chin, “You have never scared me in that way.”

“In what way then have I scared you?”

She’d opened the door to this, she had to be honest with him, “The intensity of my feelings for you when we were younger, it terrified me.”

“Do you love Dave with that same kind of intensity?” She couldn’t, could she?

Riley was sure for a moment he was pleading, begging to know something, “Dave is different, Dave is, well Dave.”

“So, you don’t feel an intensity with Dave, that you feel with me?”

“You were my first Lucas, that kind of intensity doesn’t exist with anyone else.” She moved away feeling herself getting drawn into him as she went through the door into his bathroom. She paused for a moment when she saw the giant tub in the corner with a bay window that looked out at the property, the walk-in shower right next to the closet which she forced herself to walk into, and ignore the fantasies that were already filling her mind.

Lucas watched as she took in his bathroom, he knew it was a bit much for just him, but he would never tell a living soul this, when he had it redone a few years before he’d thought about what she might like. He hadn’t thought he’d never see her again, and yet now she was in his closet studying his ties.

“These should be your go to ties for now.”

“Great, wonderful.” He watched her, “So about your clothes, what have you got that’s appropriate for hanging out on a ranch in Texas?”

“I guess it depends on what kind of work you’re going to put me to.” She teased, feeling her cheeks flush.

“Well City Girl, I think if you really want to help out we could find something for you here and there. I mean you’re going to have to be helping me with the campaign right, girlfriend?” He’d moved closer to her, wishing her could touch her—really touch her.

“True, but I can still cook, take some of the burden off of Gigi for a while, maybe do some laundry.” She caught herself getting lost in his eyes, sure she was seeing smoldering fire of desire before she blinked, knowing how easy it would be to reach up, unbutton his shirt, expose his chest, “You know, whatever I can do to help out.”

Lucas could think of a million things she could do to help, and none of them had to do with cooking, laundry, and everything with being naked in his bed, calling out his name. “You don’t just have those short skirts, do you?”

“Maya is sending me some more stuff, I never had a chance to pack for Texas, I was packed for Hollywood.” She licked her lips, feeling as if the closet was growing ten degrees. “What’s wrong with my skirts?”

“Nothing” His voice was thick, needy as his fingers ran through her hair, tangling with her soft curls as his lips crashed down on hers and her body clung to him, feeling him lift her up, carrying her to the bed.

“Riley, Riley?” Lucas snapped her fingers “You okay?”

“Yeah I um, spaced out, it’s really hot in this closet.” She pushed past him sure she audibly gasped at how hard his chest, “Um the stuff Maya is sending me actually should be here tomorrow afternoon if she uses the service I asked her to.”

“That will be good, if she um doesn’t send you what you need Austin really isn’t that far for some real shopping, I doubt you’d want to hit up the Wal-Mart.”

“The Wal-Mart would be fine Lucas” She smiled, “I don’t need labels, just something that fits, that I’m comfortable wearing. The only thing I’m really picky about is jewelry and only because of my allergy.”

Lucas nodded, “Good to know Ri, good to know.”

“That’s my phone.” She could hear the ringtone from down the hall, “We can finish or whatever later.”

“Of course,” Lucas watched her leave, he hung on the door, part of him wanting to bash his head between it and the frame.

It was great that she was staying, but what exactly was he going to do now? What could he do to show her that he was the man for her, that she was the woman for him?

Dates! He’d have to take her out to dinner one in a while, or to the movies, all sorts of things they used to do when they were really dating. People wouldn’t believe they were a couple if they didn’t see them together. Hell, maybe he would even take her to a scary movie so she would grab his hand, maybe that action, that touch would unlock something, anything, everything.

He pulled his phone out from his back pocket looking up movie times at the theater, he saw one he knew she would enjoy, well unless she was over her crush on Chris Evans. He went down the hall knocking gently on the door.

“Hey, what’s up?” She was just putting the phone down.

“I um realized this whole people thinking you’re my girlfriend thing probably works best if people see us on dates, right?”

“I guess, I mean we really can’t stay here all the time, people would think we were just having sex all the time or something.” Had she just said that? She wished she could understand what was coming out of her mouth around him.

Lucas had to remind himself to breathe, “Um yeah, so the new Chris Evans is playing at the Rialto tonight, and I thought we could go see it, and really be seen together.”

“Not fair Lucas, you know I can’t say no to a Chris Evans movie.” She smiled, amazed he remembered that, he seemed to remember almost everything, except their night together. But why?

“Great, it starts at seven-twenty, so we should leave here at six-thirty.”

“That’s great, casual attire, jeans and t-shirts kind of thing.”

“Yeah, oh a hoodie, the theatre tends to blast the AC, so I remember you get cold easily.”

“That would be something I don’t have with me.” She shrugged.

Lucas smiled, “I’ve got an extra one, don’t worry. We’ll go after dinner, it’s just you and me again tonight, Zay and Gigi are working again.”

“Okay, I’m going to get some stuff done, we can make dinner in a little bit.”

“Great, I’ll see you in a couple of hours.” He backed away, returning to his room and going into his closet.

It wasn’t full, barely half way filled. Which made what he was looking for easy to find. Over the years, he’d never been able to get rid of it. He’d worn it the first few weeks he was back in Texas until his mother washed it, with it she washed away the last hint of Riley’s scent, sweet and fruity. It had spent a lot of time deep in his closet, it probably didn’t even fit him now.

Abigail Adams Baseball adorned the front of the hoodie in block letters. He remembered her wearing it when she would get cold on a summer night as they sat on her roof top looking for a hint of stars. She probably didn’t remember it, but he did. He remembered so much that she’d probably forgotten, let first to the back of her mind as new boyfriends took over.

He gripped the hoodie in his hands, maybe she would start to remember, start to fall in love with him again.

He grabbed the one he usually wore, his old Texas A&M one that had seen better days, and he should probably replace it.

As he looked at the two of them, he wondered if she could ever love him again. If she could ever open herself up to him. No matter what happened Lucas Friar wasn’t going down without a fight for Riley’s heart, and he was going to prove to her that he was worth it, that he would always be worth it.

[josephkitchen0]

Some Pretty Things Happened

December 6 Reminded that life can change in an instant, I feel particularly keen to take pictures of what I see and love, and enjoy, and it helps me, now, to look at pictures (before and after)... to remember, to appreciate anew, to let go, but quietly, with a thankful heart. So, I look at Maria in her Witch Thursday hat, the one her friend painted for her for her birthday, and though it is bittersweet, because I love every happy memory of Jet Puff, our family car, and I am sad it's gone, I am glad I have this photograph, this normal, happy moment. And after the hospital, and the tests, and all of the scary and surreal events of the night, I finally did go upstairs to my dear, familiar bed, and Cairo came and did what a sweet pet will... he stayed close beside me, warm, and comforting, and I felt at home, which meant the beginning of healing. All of these pictures are moments in December when I saw something beautiful, wanted to hold on to scenes when I felt something joyful. I was a quiet observer, or was aware of what I could not do, or how much of what was happening was an altered, or interrupted event... I don't know how to explain it, but even the good in these moments makes me recall what was also difficult, or disappointing, painful, or muddled. Still, I am glad that we took as much of our time and intentions as we could, and made the very best of it we could. (I am not convinced that was a good sentence, but...) December 9 The first Monday morning when Maria would go into school, and Max, too. When the day should have been routine, and I might have baked treats for her to share with classmates, or helped her choose a fun holiday outfit. I walked into her quiet room and sat on her bed, and felt the most profound relief and thankfulness... just to be there, to see her sleeping, to wake her, and do all I could to give her a nice start to her day. I really am so lucky, I thought. I really do love to be here, to be a mother, to have this home, and family, and to have a community to support me, us. I wanted to keep her home, to slip into family time and all of the happiness of the holidays, but I was thankful, too, that she would have her school and friends, the classes she loves, and all that she needs in her own abilities, and confidence to get through her day. I think this is one of the prettiest Christmas trees we have ever had. The first week we left it alone, and just adored its plain, piney boughs. Then William and Alex put lights on it... white lights, this year, because I wanted their calm, and soft glow. And that's as far as we got. Just the lights, then an ornament from Kim, then tiny gifts, but we never brought out our ornaments, or an angel or star. And while it wasn't a disappointment, I was aware that we were just a bit overwhelmed, and simple suited us better. December 10 These pictures... this was the first really happy laughing, I had. And so silly. Cairo was after my tiny tree I put on that cupboard, and he was biting it and knocking it over. So! I sprayed it with an essential oil mosquito repellent, because I read "mint" on the bottle and he hates mint. Well, after I sprayed, he was worse! He tore the tree down, and went for the things on the wall, and then! Then he started chewing the carpeting! I was aghast. Alex, asked about the spray and I told him, and he laughed, reminding me that the natural repellent, so effective at discouraging mosquitos, was mostly catmint! Poor Cairo was high as kite! Muddled, muddled me. This was such a beautiful sunrise, and I was happily awake, having had my first night of sleep since the accident. It was a visit from friend and therapist, Mahshid, that relieved some of my pain, emotional and physical. Her wisdom is still serving me well. December 11 December 12 My Mom came all the way from Oregon, the very next day after the thing. And Hans, my brother, drove her from the airport. By the end of her first week, we had a bit of a routine, that I miss. We would take Maria to school, then walk. Walking was not much more than making an errand, the market, or pharmacy, or a shop, and we would stop for soup, or tea, to take pictures. Our outings perked me up, and tired me, in a good way. I felt quiet and slow, and she kept pace with me. At home she was wrestling with laundry, and getting hot meals on the table, matching socks, answering Chango's requests. She bought me a heating pad, one of Mahshid's brilliant prescriptions. Everyone should have a heating pad. Cairo is a heating pad, too. And I appreciated his warm company. Finally, I had to give up on the little tree, but chamomile came back at Trader Joe's and I could have cried from happiness! And Jennifer sent gifts, which she suggested I open early... a brilliant suggestion! December 14 Every year I am full of best intentions and plans for Christmas, for gifts, cards, gestures, thanks, decorating, and playing. I never quite achieve the height of perfection I imagine and hope for... this year was nearly a bust, on my part. Thankfully, I had the sense to let mail order and shipping help me, and I relied heavily on assurances that 'no one expected me to do everything, or anything, this year,' which was kind. But I missed feeling capable of doing better. I was sad not to have a chance to do a better version of my best. I know I sent someone a heating pad, because everyone should have a heating pad. Sometimes I took pictures of... of maybe kind of odd scenes, but they seemed so precious to me, so poignant. It's difficult not to find beauty in odd places when you are lucky to be alive, or simply concussed. December 16 They never complained. It doesn't surprise me. They are happy, easy, content with simple pleasures. But still. They missed a lot. We had plans. And besides the very special things we missed, our regular routines and peace of home were derailed, and disrupted, and I wouldn't have blamed them or thought any less of them if they made a little protest, or whine. But they were all comfort and joy, gratitude, and resilience. I am not boasting or wearing rose-tinted glasses. I sometimes feel I say too little about what a joy our children are, and in this instance I want to really acknowledge how much easier they made things for me, how thankful I am for them. December 17 December 18 December 19 When this box of homemade cookies from Laura and Gary came in the post, it was a moment that felt like Now, it's really Christmas! Their cookies, so prettily decorated, so delicious, too, are a welcome tradition. Last year, we wished we could have been in Wisconsin. We wished for a last Christmas in the house on Park Street, with Grandma Nancy. And this year... this year we simply missed everything and everyone we love in Wisconsin. December 20 When I was showing signs of rallying, when the government was about to shut down... my Mom had to make a choice about getting home. I wish we had taken more pictures. Yeah, see... this seems like a lot of pictures, for some, I suppose. But I was keenly aware that I was not taking as many as I usually do, that I didn't have the mental vigor to organize family pictures, or more... what are those called? Natural? Spontaneous? Darn word... Anyway, suddenly my Mom was flying home, which was good, because she was going to be with Dad, and could hopefully recover. And I just wish I had more pictures. What is that word? Candid. Ugh. Is this concussion, or just being 52 years old? Let's call it concussion. Because I am not in the mood to imagine that I am mentally doddering, yet. I had to analyze many things that were on the calendar or planned for, and consider what I was up for, capable of managing, or consider how we could make them manageable. Like school. My last day of school was the very next morning after the thing, and missing my final was way sadder to me, more unbearable, than I could stand, so with Alex's company and assistance I went to school. I was slow and felt strange and... no matter, I felt empowered, and triumphant and glad to have made it. But then shock wore off and pain crept up and up, and things made me very tired, or simply run out of anything like energy or sense... and we started crossing things off the to-do list. Of all the big and fun happy holiday events, my favorite tradition is probably celebrating Solstice. I always feel as though it's our gift to our friends, our thank you to them, and such fun to gather and observe the fortune of friends, light, merriment. But I wasn't sure it was such a good idea this year, which was too depressing to accept. Finally, William, Alex, Maria and Max, looked me in the eye, assuredly and calmly, and said, Don't worry. We will get everything ready, and it will be an easy and happy party, that you will love, and will not want to miss. And it was. They rallied. They cleaned, cooked, prepped, and hosted. Ruth came early, to bring apple crisp, and yellow roses. I had made the theme about our heritage, everyone's heritages, the recipes and traditions we have from our immigrant or Native ancestors, and it was a potluck. Everyone shared food, recipes, snacks, anything that comes from family, from love. I loved the stories. I loved the whole night. Maria and Amira... last day of school, first night of winter break! Kay and Max~ With Swedish snacks, like Wasa crackers and herring! Avram, Sanjana, Coram, and Cathan, with Indian spicy snacks! Spencer and Ido... Leslie, Simon, and Bex, too. They brought Turkish delight, and Hummus! And robots! December 21 I wish I had taken more pictures. It was a full house, and spread out into the front yard, too. I went to bed late, and happily tired. December 22 Next time I will blog about Christmas Eve and Day, and a birthday... and more memories, more moments that make me smile, thankful, heartened. I know I mixed in mention of that event, the accident, but that's how it's been. It's part of the story, sadly, but I mean to deal with it by speaking of it, and acknowledging that it happened and it caused things. It helps me feel some power over what happened... I've noticed that other hard things that I've kept to myself, or tried to cope with by hiding, suppressing or minimizing don't go away, or get better, but just kind of linger, ache, resurface in unexpected or mixed up ways. So... new approach is to talk, speak, voice, express, write, cry, laugh, deal with it. And then look at all of the good, and celebrate, and triumph! And heating pads. Everyone should have a heating pad. Some Pretty Things Happened was originally posted by All About Chickens

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

I’m having serious issues

Keith breathed a sigh of relief when Christmas Day was finally over. Krolia had integrated herself in to Lance's family almost seamlessly, spending most of dinner talking with Miriam over the dishes served for dinner. Even before that she'd joined in on the games the kids of Lance's relatives were playing, causing bittersweet feelings to blossom over what he could have had and never had with her. Lance was smiling and laughing, he seemed so much happier then when Keith had left for the afternoon with Krolia as their little group picked into the lunch leftovers, still somewhat stuffed from lunch. She even passed the tick of approval from Lance's grandparents. They'd both liked Keith well enough, giving him a 10 pesos note and a wink like his husband had said they would. Keith even got a pinch on the arse from Lance's grandmother. It'd been years since they'd visited his father's grave, only one since Earth had been liberated and that had been in the early days. Despite the downfall of the Galra, time had slipped through their fingers and they'd wound up leaving his father resting there all alone for far too long. Krolia knew what Christmases had been like due to their time on the space whale, but this was only their second time celebrating the holiday since being reunited. As much as he'd been hurt by Lance insisting that he went off with his mother, he'd needed time with her more than he knew. Maybe it was because it was Christmas that he needed her in a whole other way. Sitting at his father's grave, he felt a little stupid talking to the headstone about Lance and all Lance had done for him... yet, he still promised his father he'd bring his husband to visit soon.

  When they finally climbed into bed for the night, Lance was shy as he inched towards him, Keith quick to give the Cuban the reassurance he needed. He had so many questions and no idea where to start, his fingers running along the thin gold chain around his husband's neck. He'd bought it so Lance had somewhere to keep his "wedding ring", that wasn't where his little finger had been. Keith had intended to find hid something more fitting of his lover, yet nothing screamed Lance at him and he wasn't about to settle for second best. He wasn't like Lance. He wasn't sure on his gifts. He didn't know exactly what to buy everything one. Lance had brought joy to their whole family unit with his gifts, Keith had brought rolled eyes with weapon related gifts. He'd bought his husband enough clothes and blankets to last until he was compelled into his next spoil session. He'd picked up various face creams for his husband, but had no idea if Lance liked them already had them. Lance had access to more technology and weaponry than he did. All the really cool things... Leaving him behind all over again.

  "I can hear you thinking"

Nuzzling his cheek against Keith's chest, Lance's hand gripping his hip fractionally tighter. He'd seemed so scared in front of Krolia. Lance was trying to hide his emotions but his scent had said it all. The Cuban was shaken and pushing him away, throwing the walls up that Keith had thought they'd broken through

"Who did you call?"

That wasn't the question he was going to ask... It was the question he'd wanted to ask, yet intended to ease into once he figured out what he wanted to say

"My therapist"

That wasn't what he expected. He'd been angry that Lance had chosen to make the phone call rather than come with him and Krolia... those feelings might have passed, but for Lance to call his therapist on Christmas Day

"It's my fault isn't it? Because I left? I didn't..."

"Babe, no"

"You called your therapist..."

He was happy Lance seemed to have found someone... but again, Christmas Day. For Lance it was a special day, for him it brought back the memories of being locked away hungry, or hit for asking for something as small as a glass of water or new pens for school

"I called my therapist because I needed help"

Lance had talked to his therapist maybe twice? Yet he'd turned to them instead of him

"I should have..."

"No"

"You don't even know what I was going to say"

"You were going to say you should have helped. Shiro explained things to me... I thought... I wanted to give you new memories. I know you I can't take your pain away, but I wanted to give you good memories. It was also why I was going to suggest you go out with Shiro for a bit... Seeing your mum made me feel guilty. About me and my past... because your mum like knows. So I called my therapist. Erathus kind of has Christmas, it's not holiday though... I managed to get through, well I had to wait for them to return my call. I wanted to call them when my head was so messed up because I'm still trying to be better. I didn't mean to be rude to your mum"

  Lance's honest answer tugged hard on his heart. His husband was trying so hard and he'd dared to be mad. Rubbing his back, he resisted the urge to kiss the top of Lance's head

"I'm really proud of you. Today was... all over the place. I can't believe it was only 24 hours long"

"Christmas is a mission of its own. For the record, I do like your mum. My head went stupid places because I was confused. I shouldn't have acted like that"

"You're fine. I was mad... I didn't get why you didn't come with us, until after we were at dad's grave"

"Christmas is... Christmas isn't always good for people... sometimes it's just another day. I thought you needed your mum, like I needed my mum today. I don't know if that makes sense. I'm really sleepy"

  They were all really sleepy. Keith and Lance had both been leaning heavily on each other as they stumbled back to their bedroom. Once again going to kiss Lance's hair, he forced himself to stop all over again

"It was our second Christmas together that I can remember. We didn't do anything on Daibazaal. I think we were both working and didn't realise until after"

"I remember. We had a group call. I missed it, then called you back on Boxing Day so you wouldn't think anything was wrong. I know it's probably awful to say, but I'm glad Hunk and Pidge didn't come today"

Talking of Pidge, he was reminded that she'd sent a present care of Veronica

"Pidge sent a gift. Hunk said he and Shay would be dropping by when they could"

"Do you know what was in that box? It was that damn finger she mentioned... I don't know how to tell her I don't want it"

Lance's mottled left hand didn't bother him. He hated that he'd been hurt the way he had, yet was grateful that they hadn't taken the whole hand. While he didn't hate it, he knew his husband felt differently. That's why it was constantly hidden

"You don't?"

"My hand looks like a freak show as it is, it doesn't need a creepy alien finger attached"

"It doesn't look like a freak show. You don't have to use the finger if you don't want. I love you, either way. You know that, don't you?"

"Yeah... I love you too. Let's just go to sleep?"

"Sounds good babe"

"I feel like I could sleep for a phoeb"

"You're not the only on, but I promised dad we'd visit soon"

"I'd like that... mmm, sorry, I'm falling asleep"

"You just sleep. I'm not going anywhere"

"I apologise now for any nightmares"

"Babe, you don't need to apologise"

"Want to... now go to sleep. I'm drooling"

Keith wasn't sure what Lance's drooling had to do with anything, yet with Lance already nearly asleep he didn't ask. They had tomorrow to talk. They had the rest of their lives to talk. Tonight he was going to sleep like the absolute dead.

      *

Keith had no idea how time had passed so fast between Christmas and New Year's Eve. Two days after Christmas their teams had come for a fly out to his old shack, then he and Lance had visited his father's grave from there, yet with that being pretty much they only thing they'd done, somehow the week had vanished before he knew it. There'd been chores to do, Lance proving to be more help than he was as they worked on Jorge's tractor. A new group of aliens came in to work as farmhands for the fruiting junipers, and Kalternecker had escaped her pen, but that was seriously all that happened.

  It was alarming how fast he'd grown used to doing next to nothing around the farm. Sure, he pitched in where he could, but it wasn't the same as flying all over the place on missions. All of them were brimming with extra energy. His team taking on training Daehra and Lucteal in protective hand to hand moves. Lance wasn't allowed to join given he had a seizure out of nowhere in the middle of the night, then another the following morning, so spent the time sitting between Keith's legs under the shade of some fruiting tree where Keith could monitor his condition and temperature. His husband assured him he was fine, only a little sleepy, Daehra had been forced awake in the middle of the night to run scans on the stubborn Cuban. Her best guess was it was the release of stress now that Christmas had passed, coupled with Lance messing with his medication schedule. All Keith could be grateful for was that neither seizure had happened at the house, and that they hadn't been caused by Lance overdosing. Christmas had been shaky in the middle, but looking back on it, he'd never felt as happy, loved or content as he had on the day itself. Lance had a slightly different view though, thanks to his anxieties, which was hard on both of them as his husband took all of Boxing Day to truly bounce back from the previous day. He hadn't wanted to leave their bed, tearfully apologising for his depression. He loved his husband and loved the fact he'd tried so hard for the sake of everyone there, so they'd spent the day tangled up in their blankets together, Keith placing his game while Lance alternated between napping and simply watching him play, occasionally throwing in a suggestion when Keith got stuck, but for the most part he let the half-Galra work things out for himself.

  With the Garrison's New Year's party looming, and Shiro's smaller New Year's part looming, Keith wasn't looking forward to either. He didn't want to make an appearance at the Garrison, he'd said so as much, yet the invitations had already promised that the Voltron Paladins would be present... yet Lance hadn't mentioned the party at all. Out of fear that his husband hadn't been invited, Keith didn't mention it either. If Lance wasn't going, then he wasn't going, and if they'd forgotten to invite his husband it was safe for everyone that he didn't. He wasn't above blowing up some smaller unstaffed storage areas of the complex in retaliation for hurting Lance's feelings by forgetting him. His husband was the most gentle and loving person known to mankind when he wasn't being a dick, and although they'd agreed that they'd spend the next deca-phoeb transitioning jobs, Keith didn't want to go back to work and leave his husband to wake up alone. Waking up with Lance was special. The times he's woke before his husband even more so as it allowed him time to study his husband without being self conscious. He loved the way Lance's eyelashes were stupidly long, and the way his lips would twitch then form a smile when Keith would whisper how much he loved him. He loved that Lance felt secure and safe enough to remain sleeping in his hold, trusting him to keep him safe. He loved the way Lance's collarbone would peek out from under their blankets... He was stupidly in love with Lance, and with their impending separation, he loved all these small moments even more. His husband might not be perfect to everyone else, but to him, he was his everything.

   With Veronica and Acxa doing the chores, they were allowed the luxury of sleeping in on New Year's Eve. They'd stayed up the previous night playing card games, where Lance had shown he was amazing when it came to basic card tricks and sleight of hand. Actually, Rachel, Marco, Lance and Veronica had all been. There was some kind of sibling rivalry at play where they took particular delight in destroying each other, so Keith, Tobias, Acxa, Zethrid and Ezor had formed a team against them. Tobias dealing the crushing blow that had taken Veronica out of the game. For a man who he'd never really interacted with, it was refreshing to see Tobias opening up to them. He'd been so sure the man was an Altean in disguse, yet it seemed like Tobias simply enjoyed the antics of Lance's team and remained because of that. Next to fall to him was Lance, then Marco and Rachel had ganged up against them. It all came to a draw when Rachel spilt her drink, in a move Keith was sure was deliberate, all over the kitchen table. Calling it a night there, they realised it was already well into the Early hours of the morning. Waking a little after 9, Lance slept through until 9:30, his husband nosing at his chest until Keith finally paid attention to him. Spending the next half hour sharing small kisses and checking their comms, Lance sent him off to shower first. They'd stopped showering together for the moment, due to Keith accidentally picking up on Lance's discomfort through his scent. He loved the physical intimacy of touching Lance as they showered, but it wasn't what kept him in the relationship. He didn't need the physical stuff. His heart belonged to Lance and that was all he needed to know. When he'd returned from showering he found Lance had been busy. A bag packed and sitting by the edge of their bed. Board shorts, a black singlet, cap and sunnies and sunscreen sat on his side of their bed. He knew going to the beach had been on the plans, except he thought it would be later. Kissing him on the cheek Lance disappeared to shower, returning wearing a long sleeve rashy and boardies. His gloves didn't look quite so weird against the dark blue and black of rash shirt... though Keith was sure that someone was bound to point out that people didn't usually wear gloves to the beach. In an act of silent support, Keith donned his fingerless gloves. It was only by some miracle that they'd survived as long as they had, though with his constant want to touch Lance skin to skin, they hadn't been warm a lot lately.

   Grouping at the house, the next problem was that Deahra, Zethrid and Ezor all needed swimwear. Zak was refusing to leave the Telula since he was on a roll with his coding, while Lucteal had borrowed a pair of board shorts and a shirt from Lance, and Tobias was gifted the same in an old set of Luis's. Not being a girl, Keith didn't understand why the girls couldn't borrow a swim suit or two from Veronica and Rachel. Daehra seemed to be around the same dimensions as Rachel, though she always had most of her body covered... Rachel however was already in a pink bikini with short white shorts. Then again, he wasn't sure he wanted to share any of his underwear... maybe with Lance? If they were clean then what was the problem?... but girl's bodies did other things, and Acxa was wearing one of Veronica's bikinis under a see through cotton dress, matching her girlfriend... Did that make it a couple thing? Or did the others simply want their own swimsuits? Girls would always be a mystery to him... Keith continued to mull through the problem, even as Miriam refused to let them out the house without applying sunscreen, leaving him forces to endure Marco squirting far too much on his pale skin. He couldn't help having fair skin, and in his defence, Zak was the palest of all of them, but without the man there his argument only drew laughter from Lance who was allowed to go ahead and load up the old truck because he'd had the foresight to apply it. There'd be no exaggeration to say that Keith had a few choice words he wanted to say to his husband about not prewarning them in the safety of their bedroom. When they finally got out of the house, Rachel declared she was taking the others shopping so Lance needed to drop them off first, and that they didn't need to worry about paying because Miriam had given her money for the swimsuits. Being Lance, he scolded his sister, then promptly made them all wait while he transferred GAC over into his sister's account and took the cash she had on her, muttering something about how Rachel couldn't be trusted not to blow it all at once or to not waste their families money.

  Keith already knew Lance was sending GAC home to support the farm, with Christmas and now New Years, it hurt to think that maybe Lance's family were in financial trouble with all the presents they'd gifted this year. Miriam's gift to him had been a black jacket Lance had told his mother to buy him and a copy of the photo the woman had taken where Lance was sleeping on him in the living room, placed in a nice gold coloured frame. He'd also found that his own photo had made it up on the family wall of photographs, in addition to photos of their teams from Christmas. The half-Galra had to give the woman credit, she worked fast. He didn't even know she'd gone out, let alone gone out, had the photos printed, then framed and hung all within the last week. Even Krolia had made it up onto the family wall. After years of neglect and abuse, Keith was scared by how welcome and how fast he'd been accepted into Lance's family. He was terrified that one day all of this would ripped from him, that one day Lance would grow tired of him... What would happen to their photos then? He didn't want to be bounced to another home. Another family. He didn't want Shiro to be stuck picking up the pieces. Lance had shown him so much love that he didn't know how to go back to being "just Keith".

      *

Varadero Beach was breath taking. Everyone seemed to have the same idea as towel after towel lay on the white sand. Knowing one of the bar owners close to the beach that also sold surfboards, Lance parked right up near the building, enjoying the way his husband stared out the windscreen. Leaving the keys in the ignition, Lance climbed out the old family truck, walking the few steps over to the backdoor of the bar and sticking his head in

"Ernesto! You in?"

  Ernesto was Lisa's uncle's brother's something or other. The older man had pretty much watched them all grow up down on the beach. As far as Lance knew he'd never seen the man outside of his precious bar. His marriage had failed and he'd never had children, doting on him and his siblings as they'd come up to annoy him by traipsing sand all over the front decking. Smiling as Ernesto groaned, the man was wiping his hands as he walked into the backroom

"I heard you were back"

The annoyance in his voice was all an act. Many an hour had been spent here after losing Allura. The man didn't have the heart to kick him out as he drank his pain away

"Yep. Had to drop in and give you the heads up. We took your staff parking bay"

"What's to say I don't have staff that needs it?"

Rolling his eyes, Ernesto was too stubborn in his ways for staff to last long, now he managed mostly alone

"Because I know you saved it for me. Hey, I've got someone I want you to meet"

"This that husband of yours?"

Lance poked his tongue out

"Possibly. I'll bring him up soon. Just wanted to give you the heads up that we've come to terrorise you"

"You could have done so at the bar"

"I was scared you'd deny me service"

"Estupido. Get out of here and bring him in properly. That sister of yours better not be here"

"Which one? Veronica's back"

"Dios help us. She's banned from the tequila. You make sure she knows"

"Nope, that's your job!"

Giving Ernesto a wave, Lance darted back out the door as the old man grumbled. Veronica had had a slightly misplaced youth. They'd snuck off with a bottle of tequila when they were kids, only for Veronica to throw up all over Ernesto's new board stock. The memory was comforting, and something she was yet to live down.

  Smiling to himself Lance walked to the back to the truck where Marco was passing out their gear. Taking his old board from his brother, he didn't know Marco had bothered packing it. He didn't really feel like surfing. He wanted to lay in the sun and watch everyone else making fools of himself

"What did the old man say?"

"V's still banned"

Getting smacked in the back of the head by his sister's flying towel, Lance snorted. She and Acxa could have gone with the others. Nothing was stopping them

"Don't go telling everyone that!"

"Blame Ernesto. Nothing gets by him"

"You've thrown up here far more times than I have!"

"Ahhh, but sister, I didn't throw up on his new boards"

"No, you just threw up everywhere else"

  Carrying the picnic basket his mother had packed, Keith wore a deep frown as he came to his side

"Something I should know?"

If Keith really thought it through, two and two would eventually equal four

"Nope. You already know enough. Anyway, Ernesto wants to meet this famous husband of mine. We'll meet you guys down there"

"Slacker!"

"Don't blame me because everyone wants a piece of this"

Shooting Marco finger guns, his brother flipped him off

"Keith's the only one who'd ever want a piece of that. Keith, bro, you do know that you are wasted on our brother"

Nudging him with his shoulder, Keith's expression softened. Lance blushing slightly

"I don't know about that. He has his moments..."

"When you figure out what they are, let us know. We've been trying to figure them out for years"

"He's great in bed..."

Marco dropped the surfboard he'd been picking up, while Lance choked on his own embarrassing squeak

"...He sleeps like the dead. He's great to cuddle into. He's not as much of blanket hog as you'd think. You two are both as bad as each other"

"We just got played by your husband, didn't we?"

Lance nodded up at Marco, Marco sighing

"Fine. Go on already. I want to get down to the water and wash those mental images of my little brother having sex from my mind. No one wants to see that... Keith..."

Shaking his head at Keith, Marco picked the surfboard back up. The fact that Keith had rendered Marco silent was kind of a miracle.

  Leaving the board and the picnic basket by the front steps up to the deck area, Lance pulled Keith along with him. Above them the fans of the bar turned lazily, rocking almost ominously from how long they'd been hanging. Ignoring the tourists staring at the pair of them, Lance was just about to step into the darkened interior of the bar when Keith yanked him back

"Babe?"

"You used to come here to forget Allura, didn't you?"

"Yeah... after Red left it was like the whole world tilted left and I had no idea what to do. You know, half this place was destroyed when the Galra attacked. Instead of building a new bar, Ernesto went about patching it all up so everything looked exactly how it used to. It was a shame these fans survived. They used to scare the quiznak out of me when I was a kid. Marco told me if I was too loud it'd fall on my head"

"Babe... are you sure it's alright? I mean..."

What did that even mean? Allura wasn't going to be sitting right there, waiting to disapprove of their whole relationship or steal him away from Keith

"You're over thinking things. Yeah. I was in a bad place when I used to come down here, but Ernesto never turned me away. He probably should have kicked my drunk arse to the curb"

"I don't know. It feels weird"

Because his anxieties hadn't been annoying enough over the last week

"Don't go saying things like that. He told me to bring you 'round front. Now, that means walking through this doorway and a massive 6 steps to the bar"

"Ok..."

  Smiling at the two beers sitting on the bar, and the creak of the wood under their feet, Ernesto gave Keith the once over as Lance walked right over to his waiting beer. Sliding up onto the barstool, he waited for his slower husband to catch up

"Is there something wrong with him?"

Narrowly avoiding snorting beer out his nose on his first sip, Lance shook his head. If Ernesto wanted to meet Keith, then Lance was simply their for the ride

"There must be. He looked just as he does on the television"

"Uh. Hi, I'm Keith"

Extending his hand towards Ernesto, Ernesto raised his eyebrow as he took Keith's hand in his. Lance could almost see his internal laughter. No one shook hands with Ernesto, or at least no one around here did

"Ernesto. I expect that husband of yours told you as much"

"Yeah. He said you... were there for him"

"He damn near paid for half the rebuild on this place. Gotta take care of my best customer"

Being socially awkward, Keith's scent shifted to match his unsurety

"It was more like buying the bar top. Keith's awkward, but he's a pretty funny drunk. As for throwing up on a surfboard, he's never surfed before in his life"

"What kind of man have you brought home?"

"The good kind"

"I suppose you're going to be teaching him then? Be sure to let me know, I could use the laugh"

Shaking his head, Lance wasn't even sure he was getting in the water yet

"Marco"

 Letting out a hearty laugh, Ernesto leaned heavily on the dark wood bar

"Bah. He's goofy footed and you know it"

"True. But Keith has to learn how to paddle first. You can't run without walking"

"There's some good breaks out there. ' suppose I'll be seeing you out there?"

"Beer and swimming? It's almost like you want to see me drown"

"There's worse ways to go. You boys staying for the bonfire?"

"Ernesto, please. Like I'm going to miss that. Keith's got plans though. He's off to the Garrison"

  Scrunching up his face, Lance was pretty much done with the Garrison. He'd had enough of them when they'd first returned, and they'd definitely had enough of him. They'd invited him to their new year's party, and he'd promptly tossed the invite in the bin. They already considered the MFE pilots better than the Paladins, so he didn't see what he had to offer them. Plus, when they'd asked him to talk to the Garrison students all they'd wanted was for him to promote the Garrison and not Allura's wish for peace.

  "Ah, I see. Make sure you keep an eye on him, with skin like that"

Making an exploding motion with his hand, Ernesto explained it with a "whoosh"

"Mami made sure he's sunscreened up. She and papi said they'll be down about sunset"

"In time for the barbecue... we'll I wanted to meet this husband of yours. Can't believe our little Lance is all grown up and married. He used to talk about you an awful lot. How much he admired you. How he was never worthy of representing Cuba as a Paladin. Keith, you hurt him and I'll turn you into you taquitos"

"I don't intend to hurt him"

"No one ever does. Take your beers and enjoy the sun"

"Thank you..."

  Leaving Ernesto's bar, Keith kept glancing back over his shoulder as they collected the surfboard and the picnic basket from where it'd been left. He knew Ernesto had rubbed Keith up the wrong way, but he couldn't always smooth things out for his husband. Cuba was loud and fun, but what made it that way was the people you knew, with the location coming a distant second. If Keith wanted to fit in, he needed to let himself be knocked around a little his rough edges were worn away. That wasn't to say he would tolerate anyone insulting his husband. If Ernesto had done something horribly insulting, Lance was sure he wouldn't have been able to stop himself from throwing his beer in the man's face. No. All Ernesto had been doing was testing the waters in his own way. Keith needed to work that out on his own. Leading his husband over to where Veronica and Acxa were setting up the second of three huge beach umbrellas, Lance stood his surf board in the sand with a smile

"See, you guys totally didn't need us"

  Snatching the beer from his hand, Veronica rolled her eyes

"Right. That's why most of its still packed. Now it's my turn to enjoy this beer, while you unpack"

If his sister thought she was getting away with snagging his beer, she had another thing coming

"Are you sure you want to drink from that? You don't know where my mouth's been"

Raising her eyebrow, Veronica bit back

"You don't know where mines been..."

"When's the last time you sucked dick?"

Wrinkling her nose, Lance grabbed his beer back from his sister

"I don't need to think about that!"

Shrugging, Lance took the victory

"I know. My mouth is perfectly safe, but I don't know if I've picked up any weird space diseases. Gotta be careful when it comes to the woman who keeps the Atlas running"

"I'm not that bad"

"V. You're my sister and I love you, but you are totally that bad. Keith and I will set up the last umbrella. Shiro's going to pick him up about 5"

"I know dummy. I was supposed to go too"

"But you stayed for Acxa. It's so romantic..."

Stomping on his foot, Lance yelped as he jumped back from his sister

"Rude! I was saying it's nice you're spending it with Acxa..."

"I don't need dating tips from someone who got married by accident"

"You should try it. Plus, it was a "union" ceremony. Sheesh. If you're going to mock our wedding, at least get the name right. Come on, babe. Let's get set up. Then Marco can start teaching you all about surfing"

"Has Keith even said he wants to learn how to surf?"

Keith hadn't. Lance was pretty sure he didn't actually want to try. But with the board there, if he said Keith was going to learn, then he didn't have to explain why didn't want to get into the water

"That's between Keith and the water. It's not every day you get personal lessons for free"

"I don't see you volunteering to teach him"

"I'm drinking and watching. My afternoon is fully booked with all the relaxing I'm intending to do"

   Setting their umbrella and towels up away from the rest of the family, Lance smoothed out the invisible wrinkles before finally dropping down and flopping back with a satisfied sigh. With much more grace, Keith sat beside him, his hand brushing Lance's fringe back as he leaned in to steal a kiss. Poking his tongue out at his husband, Keith kissed the tip of it. Lance spluttering as he propped himself up

"That's not playing fair"

"Neither is dobbing me in for surf lessons"

Oops...

"Well... there's a perfectly good board right here"

"Lance, I grew up in the desert, how do you expect me to surf?"

Discarding the whole purpose for laying on a towel, Keith shifted to lay between them so he could wrap his arm around his waist and rest his chin on Lance's chest. Dios... Keith looked like an angel with the glow of the sun behind him

"Are you scared?"

"Pffft. No. It's just a bit of water"

"Then what's the problem? You've got good enough reflexes, you'll be fine"

"But you don't want to go in the water, and I want to spend the day with you"

  Lance's heart gave a funny beat. He was touched that Keith was thinking of him, but he was also frustrated with himself for it wanting to get in the water. The two seizures out of nowhere had scared him, and what was to say he wouldn't have yet another one in the water. He'd rather not drown to death and prove his uselessness to everyone on the beach

"The day's not over yet..."

"Babe... I can't read your mind, only your expression. Is it the fear of water? Because I'm happy to stay with you, like on the Atlas?"

Reaching up, Lance ran his fingers through Keith's hair. His husband nuzzling into his hair with a smile

"We shagged on the Atlas... and its... I need to work up to it, ok?"

"Ok, but do I really need to learn how to surf?"

"Yep. You'll like it. I don't know how explain the rush, but it's like... flying in water"

"Until a shark comes out of nowhere and eats you"

Snorting at Keith, Lance was sure if a shark did try to mess with his husband, the shark would come off second best

"The beach wasn't even open for swimming last time I was here. Too much debris and leaky stuff... you should enjoy it while there's a beach here to enjoy. Besides, we've already lost Kosmo and we've only been here like 15 minutes. Shouldn't you be chasing him down?"

Keith sighed, trying to scowl and fail

"You're not getting off that easily"

"We'll see how the day goes. Now I have a beer and some tanning to do"

"And what about me? What am I supposed to do while you're doing all this relaxing?"

They had a whole beach, and Keith didn't know what to do. The outdoors was wasted on his husband. Absolutely wasted

"You could, you know, learn how to relax with me? Or take Marco up on the surfing lessons? Or play volleyball with the others? Or save people's picnics from a rampaging Kosmo? The opportunities are endless"

"Don't go giving Kosmo ideas"

"I don't give him ideas, he does that all for himself"

"He's a menace"

"A menace you love. I was so jealous when you came back with him. I only ever met things that wanted to kill me"

Pouting at Keith, Keith stole another kiss

"What about me? I'm part alien and I don't want to kill you"

"But you're not a pet... you might like head pats and scratches... and taking all space in bed... wait a tick..."

  Slapping his stomach with his hand, Keith's smile was still dazzling. Sliding his arms up, he wrestled his husband over to he was laying along top him properly

"Fine. The next space wolf I find, they're all yours"

"Ours. You just said Kosmo was mine too. Do you think he likes cats? Should we bring him home a friend?"

"I think Kosmo and cat would only lead to chaos"

"I was thinking of bringing a couple of chickens out to the outpost, but I have no idea how chickens would go in space"

For some reason Lance's mind went to chickens with space helmets on. He liked to think that was why Keith laughed too

"Let's not take chickens into space... what else do you want for the outpost? I've been thinking we need to plan this out"

"I want you... and... yep. That's all I've got"

"Babe... I need..."

  Keith and Lance both screeched as cold water hit their faces. Staring down at them, Marco was grinning. Lance's heart was racing, the inside of his cheek bitten so hard he tasted blood

"Right you two, time to cool off"

Growling at him, Keith looked pissed

"What the hell, Marco!? We weren't even doing anything"

"Nothing yet. Come on, Keith. Veronica says she's going to teach Acxa, and I'm not coming second best to her teaching methods. She's betting 500 GAC that you'll wipe out. So up and at 'em. My baby bro's still going to be here when we're done"

"Can't I just pay you 500 GAC to leave us alone?"