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thesculptedflower · 1 year

Text

Hermosa

You work late nights at a diner that’s located in a not so safe part of Albaquerque. You have a very special regular, who ends up being your saving grace from this sad part of your life.

Content warnings: Attempted abuse, attempted sexual abuse, swearing, violence, +18, MDNI

Tropes: Age gap, denied feelings, forced proximity, ’’who did this to you?’’

Part 1/? I've been away for so long I don't know if this goes anywhere anymore. My life is so messed right now, that I just thought that maybe writing would ease it up a bit. We'll see. I missed this. Will proofread later, so sorry for any typos.

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You’re already handing the take-away cup over the counter, before your customer has even had a chance to order. He’s a regular, always comes fifteen minutes before closing, always orders a black coffee with a pinch of cinnamon. It suits him.

’’Am I that predictable?’’ He grins, his fingers brushing against yours as the cup leaves your hand.

You feel a soft blush creep up your cheeks. ’’Mhmm.’’ You hum in response, taking the few coins he’s offering you. ’’ Or maybe you’re just my favourite customer.’’ You continue almost teasingly.

He lets out a playful chuckle and slips a generous tip to the breast pocket of your t-shirt. ’’That would make me the luckiest man in Albaquerque, hermosa.’’

You keep your eyes fixed on his deep brown ones and give him the sweetest smile.

The flirting has been going on for months. You’ve patiently been waiting for an invite to a date, or at least a phone number, but to no avail. You suppose it’s your age that’s holding him back. You being in your mid-twenties, and him being over his forties. Not that you’d mind, Lalo Salamanca has aged like a fine wine.

He takes a seat at the bar, like he always does, and asks you about your day. Like he always does. The air is sweet from the cinnamon in his coffee.

’’Nothing out of the ordinary, a few drunks and family feuds.’’ You tell him, leaning your elbows on the counter. ’’Oh, and an attempted robbery. Haven’t had one of those in a while.’’

Lalo’s eyebrows rise slightly, urging you to keep going about this robbery.

’’A young man, probably my age, poor thing was out of his mind with drugs. Didn’t even have a gun. I mean thank god he didn’t, but it was just sad. Probably just wanted to get some cash to buy his next fix.’’ You recollect the events of the day.

’’You called the cops?’’ Lalo asks, stirring his coffee.

’’Didn’t need to, a few truck drivers managed to shoo him away. He did promise to come back with weapons and back up though, but I’m not putting much trust on that.’’

You begin to wipe down the counter, not feeling too worried about empty threats of young narcs. You’ve seen plenty in the years you’ve worked in this diner, and this one won’t be your last.

’’I’d take it seriously, you never know what’s going on inside their heads.’’

Lalo’s suddenly very serious tone catches your attention. You turn to look at him and to your surprise he’s almost angry. Worried even.

You place a hand on top of his and smile softly. A very brave move, one you’ve not tried before. He stares your hand for a quick moment before lifting his eyes back up to yours.

’’I’ll be fine. I do have a taser behind here.’’ You reassure him.

The diner clock rings as a sign of closing, pulling you out of the moment.

’’I’m going to have to kick you out now.’’ You tease, knowing full well that he’d rather stay in, even if just a moment longer.

’’Still won’t let me stay?’’ He tries to bargain, like he always does. Bit of the gleam has returned to his eyes.

You’re well aware of the cameras in here, and of the fact that my boss keeps a close eye on them. Can’t have any strange men in here alone with me.’’ You tell him, like you always do.

You walk with him to the door and open it for him. He stops to place his hand on the small of your back. The sudden closeness takes you by a surprise, yet you still lean into his touch, ever so slightly.

’’I’m no stranger to you hermosa.’’ He almost purrs. ’’Stay safe, I’ll see you tomorrow.’’

You say your goodbyes, already missing the warmth of his hand on you. You lock the door and watch him walk through the parking lot to his car. He turns to look back at you before getting in. Like he always does. Usually he’s all smiles and winks, but tonight his eyes are filled with worry.

A shiver goes down your spine, and you try to shake away the nervousness the conversation about the robbery gave you. You turn off a few lights and put on some music to get through of the last cleaning tasks of the evening.

You’re too far away from the entrance, and too immersed in your work and the music, that you don’t hear the window on the front door shatter. Or someone slowly cracking the door open and entering the diner. Only when they’re standing a few feet behind you, and you spot their reflection on the wet floor you were mopping, you realise the danger you’re in.

You have to think quickly. The bucket in front of you is full of extremely hot soapy water and your mop is in there. You swing the mop with everything you got, and hit the intruder in the face.

He screams in agony. ’’You fucking bitch!’’ The hot water burns the delicate skin on his face, leaving him confused and aimless. His gun goes off while he’s struggling to gain his sight back, but the bullet goes awry, and breaks one of the windows.

You try to seize the moment and run away from him, but he manages to grab you by your hair and yank you backwards to the slippery floor.

You let out a cry when your back hits the floor, but you cannot stop now. You try to crawl away, towards the register where the taser is. Just a little too far.

You hear angry footsteps nearing you, so you try to get up, but the floor is too slippery from the water and soap.

’’You’re going to wish you were dead before I’m done with you.’’

You recognise the voice from earlier. It’s the same young man who tried to rob you today. Of course it is. You try to turn to look at him, to plead with him, to tell him that he can take everything from the register, but he counters your movement by kicking you in the shoulder, keeping you on the floor. You let out a helpless sob, still trying to get to the counter. Your whole body is filled with panic and you can barely focus on anything else but to surviving.

’’Drop the gun cachorro.’’

Lalo.

You try to look up at him, but he motions you to stay down. He doesn’t even look at you, his eyes, and his gun, are fixed on the other man behind you.

’’This is none of your business grandpa.’’ The young man shouts, waving his gun between you and Lalo.

’’Oh this is very much my business. This is my favourite diner, would be a real shame if I had to paint the walls with your blood. And I’m not a very good painter.’’

You can hear the wicked grin in Lalo’s voice. And the anger in the young man’s breathing.

’’Be wise, and drop the gun. Nobody has to die tonight. You’ve already embarrassed yourself enough, leave with your life, while you still have the fucking chance.’’ Lalo barks it like an order.

’’This bitch owes me! She-’’

’’She doesn’t owe you shit! And I, am loosing my patience. If you’re not out of this building in five fucking seconds, you’re leaving in a bodybag.’’

Lalo emits dangerous energy around himself, and it finally feels like he got trough the man’s drugged haze. He scatters past you and Lalo, shouting profanities and promising revenge as he runs.

You flinch as Lalo lays a hand on your shoulder. ’’Está bien hermosa.’’ He speaks so softly.

You take a hold of both of his hands as he helps you up. His hands are all over you immediately, checking you for wounds. The initial shock is starting to wear off, and in it’s place you’re starting to feel anger. Disappointment. Towards yourself.

You back off from him, taking in all the damage around the diner. ’’Fuck this shit.’’ You whisper, pulling out your phone. Lalo leans against the counter, watching you as you dial your boss’s number and call him. He too can hear the amount of yelling that’s being raided on your ear.

’’Yeah, well maybe you should hire fucking men then, but they don’t get tips for you to steal!’’ You scream into the phone before hanging up on him. You’re about to storm out of the diner when Lalo stops you by your wrist. ’’What?!’’ You’re still shouting, but it doesn’t phase him.

’’Get in the car, I’m driving you home.’’ He says with a tone you cannot argue against. You let out a breath you didn’t realise you were holding. ’’Fine.’’

The drive to your apartment is quiet. You’re so angry at yourself, for being so weak, not being able to defend yourself from a junkie. How you had just boasted that you can take care of yourself, just to be proven very wrong in a matter of 30 fucking minutes.

Lalo parks the car on the visitor spot of your building complex and gets out before you to open your door for you. You try to walk past him to get home, but he stops you once again.

’’Enough with the attitude.’’

You cannot believe the audacity. You open your mouth to fight back but he speaks over you.

’’You’re in shock, but do not let the anger get to you. You did everything you could. And you survived.’’ He’s raising his voice just a little, trying to get through your anger. You know he’s just worried and that he just saved your life, but you can’t stop the words from spilling from your mouth.

’’What do you care, you’re not my fucking boyfriend.’’ Your words are like venom to him.

’’Don’t I fucking know that!’’

Once more you open your mouth to fight back, but are left with nothing to say when his words register to you. You’re now both just angrily staring at each other, waiting for the other to make the next move. Fuck it, you think, and rush your body against his, your hands pulling him by his neck down to kiss you. Lalo doesn’t waste time wrapping his huge arms around your waist, desperately trying to pull you even closer to him. You begin to lead him towards your apartment and to your surprise, he follows. His eyes are so dark he seems like a different person, and you think that perhaps he is. How he was ready to kill a man for you, just like that.

You open the door to your apartment and pull him inside by his belt. He’s grinning just barely. He closes the door behind him, and pulls you back to him, his lips taking claim of yours.

You’re trying to remove your shirt, when Lalo suddenly stops. He takes a deep breath and removes your hands from your shirt.

’’I cannot do this to you.’’ He lets out a sigh and rubs his temples with his hand.

You let out a sarcastic laughter. ’’What the fuck Lalo?’’ Your temper is rising all over again. The tension between the two of you is so tense it could be cut with a knife.

’’You flirt with me for months, and as much as I’ve enjoyed it, I’m starting to need a bit fucking more.’’ You begin to let out all those suppressed emotions you’ve been harbouring for him.

’’And now, you almost kill a man for me, and then you let me kiss you, and lead you to my place, and on the last fucking minute you back out. You’re a fucking pussy.’’ You’re trying to hurt him. Playing nice hasn’t gotten you anywhere with him, so maybe this does. Or at least it’ll destroy anything and everything you might have had with him, so you can start moving on.

Lalo closes the distance between you, and takes a hold of your chin. Not too tight, but firm enough to keep you looking at him.

’’You just don’t get it querida.’’ He growls. ’’I’ve had my eye on you from the first time you served me a coffee in that pitiful diner. From the first fucking smile you gave me, I have been hooked on you.’’

Your eyes are tearing up from the sheer passion that’s being let out to the air around you. Everything is happening all at once.

’’You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve laid my eyes on, and I’ll be damned if something happens to you because of me.’’

He really is a dangerous man, you think.

’’But dios mio, if I even think about you with anyone else, I feel like ending people.’’

You try to struggle against his grip, but he towers over you, holding you steady.

’’I work in the cartel, I’ve murdered and tortured, both deserving and undeserving poor souls. I am not the man for you.’’ His eyes are dark but conflicted.

’’But so ain’t any other hijo de puta.’’

You can feel his grip loosen on you just a bit. You push his hand away from you, and land a nasty slap to his cheek. He bites his lower lip, but holds back from saying anything. He’s said enough, and he can only hope it makes you see him as he really is. So he too, can start moving on.

’’Get the fuck out of my apartment, I have work tomorrow.’’ You spit out almost hatefully.

’’You’re not going back there.’’ He tries to command you.

’’Try to stop me, I fucking dare you.’’ You argue. Lalo holds his tongue.

’’Fine, but I’ll be taking you home every fucking night you’re closing.’’ He leaves and slams the door shut before you can argue back.

Only when you hear his car leave the parking lot, you dare to let yourself cry. You mourn the person you were just a few hours ago, and the ’’situationship’’ you had with your favourite late night regular. But you can’t ignore the burning feeling inside your chest that yearns for this newfound person. This criminal, who burns for you as much you burn for him. For the man who would kill for you, in a heartbeat.

Would you kill for him too, if it meant killing the old you, to let a new, different you, in?

#lalo salamanca #lalo salamanca x reader #lalo x reader #better call saul #bcs #breaking bad #tony dalton #fanfiction #lalo salamanca imagine #reader insert

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theroomofreq · 3 years

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can you give me muggle jily recs pleaaseeee <3 :D

HOW MANY HIGH-QUALITY MUGGLE JILY FICS ARE THERE?? TOO MANY TO COUNT. *cracks knuckles* BUT I am here for the challenge. Jily AUs are my JAM.

Again, shoutout to our amazing @jilyarchive friends who tag every wonderful muggle jily au they come across. here is the link that will take you to their tags page. You'll find links to specific tropes and AUs :')

I've searched through my own AO3 bookmarks and history tabs, and I present to you 28 jily muggle fics that I LOVE. I am THRILLED thinking about all the good things in store for those that read these wonderful stories. This list took me ages to make because I went through and reread most of these brilliant fics. Happy reading !! xx

properly improper by @lizardcookie

“Marry me,” Mr. Potter repeats, closing the distance between them by striding back up towards the sofa, only to stop and crouch to one knee right there at her feet, looking up at her. Burning. “Pick me,” he elaborates. “Pick me, choose me, love me instead.”

- this fic is the reason why I comment the way that I do (spoiler it's because it's amazing)

The Wedding Ring by @mppmaraudergirl

What is undeniably worse than attending your sister's wedding looking as desolate and forgotten as a wilted houseplant? Drunkenly ringing your ex-boyfriend and asking him to be your date.

- SOBS UNCONTROLLABLY AT THE PERFECTION

Oh my god, they were ROOMMATES by @magic-girl-in-a-muggle-world

Silly one-shot, Muggle AU with Fem!Jily as pining roommates and Marlene as their matchmaker.

- the fic that brought me back to jily and inspired my deep obsession of fem!jily

Swipe Right, Swing Left by @downn-in-flames

The unspoken rule of using dating apps in D.C. is that you always start with where you work.

James Potter, it seems, never picked up on that one.

- giddy just thinking about this gem

'Tis the Damn Season by @petalstofish

It doesn't feel like Christmas for Lily Evans, not after losing her parents to COVID before the Holiday season. She anticipates spending Christmas all alone until a boy from her past shows up and offers her a mutually benefiting deal that has her calling him 'babe' just for the weekend. 'Tis the damn season, after all.

- cries in respect for lyrical writing

Watch Me Unwind by @maraudersftw

Lily Evans hates her job, hates the bigoted customers she has to serve as a bartender at the richest club in the city. But the one person who makes bearing all of it worth it has someone else in his arms tonight. (Rated: M)

- obsessed with the way the plot jumps around the time line in this

oil be there for you by @abby10fanfic

Texting/Social Media AU: Lily and James haven't spoken for 2 years. But that's all about to change thanks to Peter and his involvement in an essential oil pyramid scheme. Featuring boss babes, toxin-free lifestyles, binding contracts, and a very oily journey.

- YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE HOW FAB THIS IS

a matchmaking mission by @downn-in-flames

James Potter has a mission: get Sirius Black and Remus Lupin to finally admit that they both fancy the pants off each other by Valentine's Day.

His partner in crime? Lily Evans, Remus' flatmate, who he also happens to be slightly in love with

- DOUBLE the amount of pining idiots in love :")

about time by @jilyss

'sure, yeah, I can accompany you to that black tie event for your work tonight. wait. why are we on a red carpet?'

- this is my emotional comfort fic, your honor

whiskey business by @elanev91

Sirius Black has a (bad?) habit of picking up hobbies that take over his and James' flat -- this most recent one? Homemade vodka that James now has to try and peddle to everyone in the building.

- hysterical! must read!

Fashion Disaster by @maraudersftw

James Potter is roped into an awful dare by his best-mate, which involves him wearing atrocious pieces of clothing for all days until Christmas as dictated by Sirius. If this wasn't terrible enough, he now has to contend with his maddening crush on the beautiful saleswoman at the clothing store.

- classic hijinks that I live for

it wasn't a pity invite by @elanev91

Part of the December "Winter Tropes" Jily challenge. Prompt: my family invites you to join our holiday meal as an obvious setup and omG i’m so sorry

- awkward Christmas date that owns my heart

spice and honey by @clare-with-no-i

tagging along with her food reporter sister to profile James Potter, London's hottest young chef, is not how Lily Evans pictured her Monday going - especially if he's anything like Petunia’s described.

needless to say, she's in for a whirlwind at Chez Maraudeur.

- I'm one re-read away from printing this out and putting it on my bookshelf.

Waffle Wars by @elanev91

There's only one waffle maker in the dining hall and it literally always breaks. So, naturally, the only reasonable course of action is to meticulously map out when it's working and, ultimately, do a heist.

- the witty narration in this fic can not be matched

You Can Hear It In The Silence by @alrightginger

Lily is non-verbal and deaf in a world where the things your soulmate says about you end up written on your skin. She has known about her soulmate since she was seven, but knows they don't have a clue she exists and possibly never will.

- exquisite, cue me sobbing forever

out the window by @displayheartcode

A new family moves to Ottery St Catchpole.

- everything I could ever want in a fic, forever in my mind rent free

The Christmas Guest by @thegodmachine

An Evans Family Christmas: Petunia is bringing her fiancé and Lily is bringing her…Friend…

- petunia pov that gives me WINGS

Football, Calculus, and Cappuccinos by @moonawrites

At eighteen years old, James Potter has a lot going on. He's a rising star navigating the politics of professional football, the pitfalls of sudden fame, the fallout from choosing his dream over his father's company... and a serious crush on the red headed new barista at his favourite coffee shop.

- I'm still working my way through this fic, but trust me when I say its a GEM

if u like pina coladas by @zephyrcove

Lily is desperate for a date to Petunia's wedding, James has been pining, and their friends meddle ;)

- explain to me how characters can be so perfect via texting fics?

Shelf Awareness by @ghostofbambifanfiction

It's too far out of her way and she's wasting so much money, but Lily can't help but return to the bookstore every weekend, where her passion for good literature has, perhaps, been unexpectedly reignited by the messy-haired, pun-making, rather handsome bloke who works there.

- you absolutely must know that I binge read this and then immediately REREAD it

How to win a witch in 10 days by @adenei

“She’s going to find some unsuspecting wizard, get him to fall for her, and then do all the things that turn men away to get him to break things off! Won’t it be the best way to see what witches do that drives men crazy?” But what happens when the man in question is a blast from Lily Evans's past? A Jily Magical AU based on the romantic comedy "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days."

- fic based off of a rom com? YES PLZ :’)

The Fight Before Christmas by @ghostofbambifanfiction

The heartwarming Christmas tale of Lily Evans and James Potter - two plucky kids who hated one other, until the day they really, really didn't.

- complete sucker for this one

All This Time by @thejilyship

James and Lily grew up next door to one another. Their bedroom windows giving them glimpses into the others life, and also offering prime opportunities to argue with each other over every little thing. They never figured out how to be friends when they were kids, but now that they've graduated from college and are home for the summer, they have a second chance to get things right.

- one of my favvvv tropes

Let Me Love You by @thejilyship

With only a month until she's set to take the throne of Gryffindor, Lily is informed that she'll have to get married or choose to give up her throne. She never thought she'd have to even entertain the idea of an arranged marriage. Enter, James Potter.

- cries in princess diares AU

The Fabulous Baker Brothers by @frustratedpoetwrites

Lily walks a different route home from work and stumbles upon a cute little Bakery with an even cuter baker in the window.

- yes yes yes to embarrassed pining.

Marigold Mornings by @mppmaraudergirl

This is a fun game she thinks, as she removes her hand from his side and reaches up to run it down his chest. He catches her hand in his own, takes a step forward so that her nose nearly brushes against his shirt. She can feel the heat radiating off of him—or maybe it’s from her. He licks his lips and her eyes are drawn to the motion. She knows it is a bad idea, absolutely knows it.

- incredible storytelling featuring dynamic characters :') a favvv

Welcome to Pettyville by@women-inthe-sequel @alrightginger

When Lily Evans accidentally sends a text to the wrong number, she isn’t expecting to find the right person behind it. She can’t stop talking to Prongs. The only thing is, Prongs can’t stop talking about the girl in his class. What could go wrong, other than the number?

- LOVE SQUARE ANYONE

The Kiss a Stranger Project by @alrightginger

“What’s your name, then?” she asks, realizing they haven’t even properly introduced themselves yet. She nervously crosses her arms.

You shouldn’t kiss a guy without knowing his name first.

Right?

- THIS ONE WILL LIVE IN MY MIND FOREVER

#ror reqs #jily fic #mugge fic recs #jily fic rec list

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gryffindordaughterofathena · 3 years

Text

Chapter 9 : DANCING WITH OUR HANDS TIED

Book : Open Heart 2 and 3

Pairing : Ethan Ramsey x Diana Ramirez

Word Count : 1404 words

Rating : General

Category : Fluff, WIP series

Trope : And there was a confession, there was a gala, And they realize they are in love.

Warning : None

Series Summary : A fix it series where I try to fix the inconsistencies through out books two and three, by omitting certain plots and adding a few others. (Somewhat AUish)

A/N : I agonized over this chapter for a month, but it's my most favorite chapter. There is Bryce and Di bonding, lots of E and D moments and revelations in this chapter. Also, this is my submission for @choicesnovchallenge2021 day 23 - dance, beloved.

✍︎ Series Masterlist

Read chapter 8(ii) here

Diana

“So what you are telling me is Ramsey hasn’t asked you to move in with him yet?” Bryce asked while holding up a patterned tie. “According to Si, you spend almost all your nights at his place”

“That tie is ridiculous.”, she snatches said tie from his hand and continues, “And yes he hasn’t asked yet. We are still keeping it quiet after all.”

“Start keeping your stuff in his place and then move yourself.” Bryce offered.

“That’s what Val said.”

“Ah well she’s right. She’s a clever woman.”

“But enough about me and Ethan, I didn’t bring you shopping for that. What do you even wear for a reopening gala organized by your boss to whom you returned a million dollar check?”

“Isn’t this something Sienna or Val would know?”

“Val is in Chicago and Sienna is with her parents. You are my only option.” She shrugged.

“So tell me one thing. Are you dressing up for Bloom or for Ethan?”

“Ethan obviously.”

“And do you give a fuck to what Bloom thinks?”

“When have I ever given a fuck to what anyone I don’t care about thought?” she laughed as she passed another tie to him, “try this, it will go well with the blue.”

“So what I am trying to say is Ethan is obviously in love with you-”

“I- what, that’s not true!” Di flustered.

“Di there’s no point denying it, I know you better than most and I know how happy he makes you and how he lights up every time he sees you, that man is in love with you even if he doesn’t say it yet.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Tell me do you love him?”

“Of course I do.”

“That’s all that matters and that’s what ever will.”

“Thanks B. You are the best.”

“Of course I am.” His grin was back in place as he engulfed her in one of his bear hugs.

“And that’s what brings me back to what I was saying, he loves you and anything that you wear, so wear your favourite colour. It will all end up in his floor anyway.”

“Bryce!”

“You know it’s true.”

Ethan

Picking her up from her apartment was surprisingly easy. No one seemed too surprised when they saw that he was Diana’s date and whatever awkwardness was there was washed away by Sienna beaming at them and Bryce’s obnoxious cheeriness.

To be honest the only person he was afraid of facing was Jackie. The younger doctor had always been one to say exactly what she meant and Ethan was sure she didn’t care that he was her senior, and no matter how much she denied it, she deeply cared about all her friends. But well, suggesting shots was enough to win the entire group’s approval.

Although his mind is far from all of it right now. All his thoughts culminating into the single gesture that is her hand curled around his in the back of the car, her absent minded humming, her hair cascading down her back and……

Her and just her.

And cocoon of bliss they have formed in the deck of their storm accosted ship.

He is surprised by the intensity of the single word that his heart shouts at him, the one word his heart had always shouted at him without him realising.

“What are you thinking?”, her hand tightens around his.

“Just something I should have realized a long time now.”

Diana

This Edenbrook didn’t look like her Edenbrook. The one where you would be enveloped with the smell of comforting antiseptic. Or the one which smelled like Mrs. Martinez’s chocolate pudding or Danny’s baked goods or Bobby’s coffee.

This wasn’t the Edenbrook she loved. It smelled like a rich man’s money thrown without a second thought.

This wouldn’t be the Edenbrook which promised safety and security. And this wouldn’t be the Edenbrook where her weary feet would carry her to him.

………..

Her eyes searched the crowd for him. Ethan had been silent all the way to the hospital. She couldn’t blame him, the magnanimousity of what he was going to do and the precarious stakes weighed heavy on both their minds.

“Something on your mind Rookie?”

“You startled me!”

“I heard that a certain Dr. Ramsey was the one who brooded at parties.”

“He must be rubbing off on me.”

“That’s a dangerous affliction I must say.”

“And what’s the cure?”

“Hmm…let’s see, Dancing with your date?”

“Are these the doctor's orders?”

“Yes.”

“Then who am I to defy those? Let me go and find my date.” She turned to leave only to be stopped when he tugged her towards him. “Just shut up and take my hand.”

Her laughter is like the trilling of a thousand wind chimes all at once.

………………

“Ethan”

“Hmm?”

“Don’t hand in your resignation please.”

“Rookie you know that’s the only way.” His blue eyes are pained as he twirls her around.

“I know I sound selfish but I can’t stay here without you, every turning reminds me of them and how I would have died and how…” In an instant his rough calloused palms tighten their hold around her.

“It’s not selfish. I still panic every time I can’t find you and I don’t know how I’ll work without you but this is the only way I know to protect us.”

‘us’ she liked that word. So simple yet so profound. “I like this you know. I like how we aren’t hiding anymore.”

“I think it’s fitting of a man who is doing something extremely stupid in the matter of seconds.”

“You think going to Bloom is stupid? I think it’s outright foolishness.”

“No, not that, I was talking of this.”

And then he kissed her.

He kissed her in the midst of hundreds of people without sparing a second glance to any of their audience, was it stupid? Yes. Did she join in his stupidity? Also yes.

Every other thought flew out of her head in the wake of his intoxicating kisses and his woodsy smell.

She could hear her friends cheering from somewhere far, people were starting to look at them but none of them cared.

“Ethan…”

“I love you.”

Three words, uttered so softly yet so meaningfully, three words that they both had screamed so many times in their head, finally put to words.

Three words reciprocated in the golden glow of the artificial lights overhead.

Three words resonating deep in the perpetuating embrace of the blue and brown.

“I love you too. Now and forever.”

Ethan

They walked towards Bloom’s office hand in hand. Bathing in the afterglow of the shared confession. No matter what happens no one would take that away from them.

“Congratulations Dr. Ramsey and Dr. Ramirez, I am glad that you two are not hiding anymore.” Leland Bloom says in form of greeting.

“We weren’t-”

“Leave those for the people who haven’t ever been in love. Caroline and I have shared those same looks for more than fifty years now. I only hope your relationship won’t affect your work.”

“It won’t, because I am resigning.”

Leland Bloom merely raised an eyebrow, “Care to elaborate?”

“No there won’t be any need to elaborate on my decision, Dr. Banerjee will rejoin the team as it’s head as soon as I resign.”

“Dr. Ramsey, I’d be frank with you, your team is the pride of Edenbrook and the reason I bought this hospital.”

“My team will still be here, they are competent enough to—”

“Please don’t interrupt me Dr. Ramsey. As I was saying this hospital is competent and so is a dozen other hospitals but what the other hospitals don’t have is the team of Dr. Ethan Ramsey and Dr. Diana Ramirez and no internal politics is going to stop me from getting the best for my wife.”

Ethan watched as Leland Bloom turned to leave, a hundred thoughts going on in his mind, “Oh and Doctor Ramsey, tell Doctor Hirata that this is non-negotiable, she can take her schemes elsewhere.”

A/N : We are nearing the end of book 2 folks, it's been so long now. I'll see you next week and I love you guys❤

Tags :

@genevievemd @jamespotterthefirst @drariellevalentine @rookie-ramsey @aleynareads @miss-smrxtiee @terrm9 @aestheticartsx @fireycookie @maurine07 @starrystarrytrouble @schnitzelbutterfingers @tsrookie @anntoldstories @iemcpbchoices @stygianflood @sophxwithers @actuallybored @iloveethanramsey @natureblooms24 @chemist-ana @mercury84choices @uneravine @mm2305 @mrsethanfreakingramsey @smilex1104 @missmiimiie @shanzay44 @sweetheartdetectivex @potionsprefect @headoverheelsforramsey @jerzwriter @mainstreetreader @coffeeheartaddict2 @adiehardfan @mia143 @kdjdhdvksojs @satrangee-ray @lawyerlies @kachrisberry @starfall-at-velaris @estellaelysian @crazy-loca-blog @barbean

@openheartfanfics @choicesficwriterscreations

#open heart #open heart second year #dri original post #dr. ethan ramsey x diana ramirez #dr. diana ramirez #bryce lahela #ethan ramsey #e and d #fix it series

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bare1ythere · 4 years

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Do you by chance have any good tma fic recs? I have yet to read any because I'm afraid I'll have to go through a lot of not so good ones before I can find a good one.

Ohh I have a few!! I’m very biased so they’re mostly jonmartin fics but they’re all really good!! (all of these are from AO3). This got a bit long so I’m putting them under a cut

The 14 Labours of Jonathan Sims by LotusFlair is one of the first TMA fics I ever read. It follows Jon and Martin as they try to reverse the apocalypse! This was during the 6 month hiatus, so it was a prediction of what the fearpocalypse might have been like that doesn’t match up with canon 100% anymore. Regardless, It has some really cool events for each of the fears and did make me cry at the end. I really suggest it!! Description:

Atonement comes in many forms. In order for Jon to free himself, he needs to perform 14 tasks. One for each Entity. Only then will he be able to rest. Only then will he be at peace.

Guess Who’s Coming for Dinner? by pantsoflobster is a really goofy jonmartin safehouse fic where Martin accidentally invites a couple from the Scottish village over to the safehouse for dinner and have to pretend to be married. It’s really cute and, what can I say, I’m a sucker for fanfic tropes! Description:

“Jon,” Martin said. “I have made a grave mistake.”

Jon whipped his head up, nearly tossing the elastic from his messy bun. “What? What’s wrong? What--what did you do?”

“I... might have invited guests for dinner.”

Jon stared blankly. “What, here?”

“Seeing as this is where we live at the moment, yes.”

---

In which a week in the safehouse turns into a fake-married sitcom, because they deserve to worry about social ineptitude instead of the apocalypse for a minute

and some call us fools by Brightblack is another safehouse jonmartin fic where they do pub trivia!! Really cute and wholesome stuff!! Description:

There isn't much to do at the safe house, so what better than to go down to the village pub and play some trivia?

Or, Martin and Jon get to have a nice evening.

stranger, stranger by blueskiddoo is one of my absolute FAVOURITE fics!! This is a season 1 didn’t-know-they-were-dating jonmartin fic that genuinely has some really hilarious writing. Full of fun tropes and ongoing! If you only read one fic on this list let it be this one!! Description:

“Sure,” Georgie says, still laughing at him. At least someone is having fun. “Don’t you have assistants for that kind of thing?”

“Yes, but…” He huffs, scratching the back of his neck. “I wasn’t going to ask one of them to download an app called...Lover? Lov-rrr? I don’t know how you say it.” He flaps his hands dismissively. “There are--unions and such. It wouldn’t be appropriate.”

jon makes a fake account on a dating app to investigate a statement. tim sets martin up with fake account on a dating app to boost his self-confidence. it goes exactly how you might expect.

And Did You Know That You Were Always Like A Fantasy? by my friend @waitineedaname is a really cute and wholesome safehouse jonmartin fic!! Feat. the mechs as jon’s college band and DANCING!!! It’s wonderful! Description:

Even if the worst was yet to come, it was hard to care during mornings like this, when everything felt still and quiet. Not the still quietness of a world holding its breath, but the peace of Martin’s warm body brushing against his side as they went through the domestic motions of washing the dishes together.

No More Idle Hands, You’ll Destroy the Lamps by my friend @shootlngstxr is a really cool ongoing fic where instead of being just marked by the web as a child, Jon becomes a web avatar and now Annabelle, Agnes, and Oliver (plus other avatars) are working together to raise him. So much found family and Agnes and Annabelle’s relationship is really interesting!! Description:

Annabelle was there right from the beginning when he woke up. She was the one who brushed the webbed curls of hair from his face, pulled him from his tangle of slumber. When he merely stared at her, confused; she sighed, wrapped him up in her six arms, and carried him to the webbed den she tentatively called home. That definition would solidify in time.

There was, after all, a reason why children were not made into avatars. They did not yet know enough of the world to solidify their own fears, nightmares ever-shifting, changing, unstable. And he would need to be taught many things.

lastly: "Have You Tried Turning It Off And On Again?" - How the Magnus Institute learned to embrace the IT ticketing system, upgraded their antivirus, and still found the time to teach one old man how to copy and paste by shinyopals!! I read this fic last night at around 3am because I couldn’t sleep and it was genuinely so good!! The format is really fun and creative and really made me have to deal with the fact that throughout all of season 4 the magnus institute was an Actual Functioning workplace gdhskjfdhs Surprisingly a little heart wrenching at parts, but over all really funny!! Description:

I hope you find your new role as Head of the Institute as rewarding as captaining the Tundra, wrote Elias Bouchard, to Peter Lukas. There are so many people working there: all with their own interesting lives, and all desiring your attention and support. I'm sure you will relish the challenge it will bring and enjoy every moment spent with the fine men and women of the Institute. In time I'm confident they'll become like a family to you.

The Magnus Institute has a new boss. The Magnus Institute also has a new tech support technician. These two facts are unrelated, except they both happen at the same time.

Meanwhile Jon's woken up from being dead for six months and for once he's trying his best. He just wishes Martin would stop avoiding him and answer his messages...

#the magnus archives #tma #fic rec list #fic list #fic #asks #I checked through all my bookmarks for this ghdskjfds #hope you don't mind me reccing some fics by friends #they're really good i promise!!#also I have a jonmartin fic too on ao3 #if you look up grim_anatomist on AO3 you can find it #not including it in this list because that feels weird hgdskjhfds #Anonymous

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teenagecriminalmastermind · 3 years

Text

because I have a crushing need to call myself out in public

I posted 3,322 times in 2021

108 posts created (3%)

3214 posts reblogged (97%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 29.8 posts.

I added 670 tags in 2021

#tumblr - 93 posts

#loki - 83 posts

#euro 2020 - 77 posts

#fear street - 77 posts

#tfatws - 75 posts

#loki spoilers - 71 posts

#the lost symbol - 51 posts

#nick goode - 49 posts

#shang chi - 48 posts

#germany nt - 46 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#like sure you got a big house and popularity but you gave up your fucking soul and any chance to be a good person and be with ziggy trash

My Top Posts in 2021

you're laughing. Armie Hammer is a cannibal and you're laughing

407 notes • Posted 2021-01-11 00:35:42 GMT

colin and michael bullying elon musk on main is what we deserve

1186 notes • Posted 2021-05-09 04:27:26 GMT

LISTEN every ship in shang chi is top tier and valid

shang chi x katy? they're idiot best friends to lovers your honor

katy x xialing? Clueless bi and badass lesbian nation rise

xu wenwu x ying li? who on earth doesn't love the trope of man who immediately falls in love with a woman who kicks his ass, and star crossed lovers?? mob boss gives up life of crime for the woman he loves?? avenging your lost love and losing yourself in it?? tony leung gazing at you like that?? simply elite

xialing x jon jon? distinguished bi dating a clown of a pan, also accomplished boss woman dating her goofy right hand man slaps

ship and let ship AND GO WATCH SHANG CHI

1225 notes • Posted 2021-09-06 19:53:57 GMT

my favourite thing about the venom 2 trailer is that cletus kasady doesn't look like fucking ronald mcdonald anymore

1243 notes • Posted 2021-05-10 14:04:27 GMT

one big thing from Shang Chi that stuck with me was parental love, especially in Asian families. I'm from a non-chinese Asian family, but Wenwu being ready to give up his immortality for his son despite never giving him the support he needed hit close to home.

Like I hate how much the movie resonated with me in the "they may not show you love the way you need but they still love you, and that still doesn't make it okay that they treated you that way".

1767 notes • Posted 2021-09-06 04:38:29 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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sunarinluvr · 3 years

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Hey kaz

Hey hi it’s me empress the real g

And I’m a hottie and very clumsy

I kin Oikawa but I also think I may kin Kageyama but I just want to be an Oikawa Hmmm

My favourite three characters are Kuroo Kageyama Oikawa and iwaizumi

I’m 5’8 she/her and I’m a hottie :3 okay so basically yeah I am either way too loud or way to quiet depending on who I’m around. I have like SEVERE ANXIETY THO and I will cry a lot (Omd whenever I hear an anime theme song that I’ve watched I cry PTSD SHABSHSJSJNZ) I like making friends, like I wanna be POPULAR but then at the same I don’t like anybody and I just assume EVERYBODY HATES ME (because im a hottie ofc) but yes also I want to become a clicnal psychologist I would become a doctor if CHEMISTRY WASNT SO HARD and I would become an actress if I could sing. My best friend has been in love we me for 5 years but I just ignore it because I’m a terrible person and I’m very very lazy but set the highest standards for myself because I am crazy. I genuinely believe that I should’ve been born into the royal family and I like to compare myself to everyone I MEET LITERALLY EVERYONE and I get scared so easily like when the toaster pops up I jump and I just read this fic where Hinata was like a villain or sometning I got scareddddd 🤧 I hate everything I write like everything besides (when they make u insecure part 5) because I don’t think I’m a good writer HOWEVER IVE NEVER ACTUALLY READ ONE OF MY WORKS BECAUSE IT MAKES ME CRINGE. Also if I was a love trope it would be “falling in love with a mafia boss” or “the poor girl falls in love W her millionare boss” because I’m BASIC AND BROKE abdvahhsjsksks

A FANCY DINNER DATE!

song - get you by daniel caesar (ft. kali uchis)

THE DATE!

-> kuroo is a business man; of course he'd bring you out on a fancy dinner date. before he left for work he told you to get dressed by the time he came back because he's going to bring you somewhere special. he picked you up right after work and showered you with compliments, while giving you kisses. on the drive there he just smiled at all questions you asked regarding the place he was bringing you to. during dinner he asked you about your day and listened while staring at you with the most loving gaze.

SCENARIO :3

-> after getting a text from him telling you that he was outside, you looked at the mirror one more time before going out to meet him. opening the car he looks at you up and down and smirks "wow kitten, you look gorgeous tonight!" shaking your head you take a seat "so..i wasn't gorgeous this morning?" he takes your hand and gasps "how could you say that?! you look gorgeous every day!" laughing you buckle your seatbelt "thanks tetsu, you don't look too bad yourself." "what's that supposed to mean??" he said with a raised brow. "i mean you look handsome, tetsurou" you smile before giving him a kiss. the drive going there was filled with teasing and more compliments from your boyfriend, and the rest of your date went wonderful :)

a/n- HI EMPRESS!!! first of all i absolutely loved reading your little introduction there PLEASE I LAUGHED SO MUCH,,, also i chose kuroo so i hope that's alright with you! i had so much fun writing this, genuinely hoping you liked it hottie! I LOVE YOU AND THANK YOU SO MUCH MWA <3 btw ALL ur work is nice i promise >:D

#💌—it’s a date!#˗ˏˋ꒰ emp ✿ ꒱

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flower-of-the-desert · 4 years

Text

Thoughts on 2gether ep12

I knew last episode was a false sense of security and now there’s

(I love this gif so much, it works for all kinds of things that cause pain)

but seriously though, I am here for the drama like I loved how soft and fluffy it was so far but now gimme a little bit of angst for the climax please and thank you; but dont forget that happy ending ok? OK?????

I said last week and I’ll say it again, I really do love that Tine and Wat’s problems are coming from their own character flaws and issues and like yes, there’s Pam but she’s not... really the core of it you know? Like obviously the real problems here are Tine’s insecurities and overhinking and Sarawat’s not being very forthcoming with things he thinks will embarrass him in front of Tine which is kind of fascinating to me cause we saw the same thing last ep when Wat didnt want to admit the clip was for Tine at first because he was embarrassed/shy and now with the song I’m guessing it’s the same thing and/or it’s not ready yet and Wat doesnt want to tell Tine until he’s got it perfected

but it’s the combination of those two flaws of their that’s driving the drama right now - Pam being just the catalyst - and it’s all going to backfire spectacularly on Wat next episode

.... and I am here for it, this is character drama I can get behind

speaking of Pam, I wonder if that’s not another misunderstanding there when she said I love you? as in I love you romantically or I love you as a dear friend? And she also says she wants to go back to how things were before but before she wasnt dating Wat, they were just closer as friends than they are now

I hope that’s what they’re going for like she misses having Wat as a friend and wants to get their friendship back and not that she’s in love with him

I think it would work better thematically with Tine being insecure and seeing things through that lense rather than what they are in reality

but omg, my man Mil really pull through! I’m so happy he’s finally moving on from his feelings for Tine and by giving back the bracelet he’s basically telling Wat to not waste the chance he has to be with Tine now by not being careful

I read a comment after last episode that I really really liked saying that Mil doesnt really seem interested in Tine anymore but what he was doing in ep11 was mostly just to get on Wat’s nerves and trying to be friends with Tine at the very least (trying to explain himself about the attack because he didnt want Tine to be scared of him/to think he was that kind of a person) and I think this scene absolutely proves that and I love it

also the fact that he remembered that today was Phukong’s exam and sent him an encouraging message 💖💖💖

I love how Tine and Wat are walking with their hands around each other

and now we’re taking a shower together O_o

I’m not complaining

you know, I’m not getting any deeper into the kissing/sex debate because like I said last week, yes I agree that it makes sense for them to be touching more as in the show has set it up that they want to do it but this episode absolutely semented for me that the implications are there that they do do it off screen but we’re not gonna see that and usually I would be upset about it because 1) I am horny bird with a dirty dirty brain, 2) I loooooooove touchy-feely couples in general and 3) it makes sense for your couple to be physically intimate from a pure writing POV unless you’ve set up some reason for them not to be which is clearly not the case here

but... I dont know, with these two it just doesnt bother me as much as it normally would; I dont know why, maybe it’s that I adore how well developed their emotional intimacy is (and like you cant find THAT in most couples in TV either so that’s already a big plus) and that they’re clearly comfortable touching/being near each other/getting in each other’s space like a couple WOULD do, it’s the heavier stuff that is left off screen and that’s a writing choice they apparently decided to go with and well, it is what it is

the only complaint I have is that they really should have had a few more kisses, like not on FTTT’s level of making out like your life depends on it but at least little pecks here and there, I think that would have been perfect

ANYWAY, so those are my finale thoughts on that matter, MOVING ON phew

Tine’s so gone he’s smiling at a picture of Wat while being in the same room as him which is frankly #mood

Tine’s just like I do not vibe with this so I’m removing myself from the situation the moment Pam opened her mouth and he just TURNED THE FUCK AROUND AND WALKED AWAY

I thought Sarawat was the one to look out for when it comes to jealousy but Mr I’m gonna punish you all night long here is actually the real deal

Type and Man are EXACTLY that cat/dog meme and I’m living for it, this entire scene is just so funny and Type’s little “open it” at the end is just 🤣

I like how they’re building up Tine’s insecurities over Pam little by little by having Tine find similarities between them and then with the talk about first loves and letting us see how he comes to the conclusions he does so it makes sense how it all happens

holy shit I did not expect Man/Type to break my heart too but HERE WE ARE

that dinner scene was so hard to get through especially because what Man is going through realising he’s got nothing much to offer Type at the moment, financially speaking and that he’s still a first year and he’s got a lot of things left to do for his own future and life and just... that hits hard

unpopular opinion but I actually like that Type left with the asshole boss because 1) that’s gonna make him realise that he does miss Man when he stops coming to him next ep and 2) like from Type’s POV it makes sense? he barely knows this kid that’s been chasing him non-spot and annoying him and yeah, sure he’s helpful and seems genuine in his feelings and Type clearly is starting to melt a little but but he also wants to not lose his job and offend his boss (he might be a total jackass but he’s still Type’s boss) so he’s got no choice but to prevent the situation from escalating

also I like to think that maybe part of why he decided to leave was cause he was trying to protect Man by not letting him get in a fight with the guy

also did I say how much I am here for the drama next week when Man really does stop looking for him and Type realises oh shit I did NOT want that and yells at Man for disappearing on him after making him feel these things

which is basically like how Tine decided to go about confessing his feelings not like a normal Braincell-filled person but accusing Wat of not taking responsibility for making Tine fantasize about kissing him and OMG these two really are brothers, arent they?

I really was hoping Wat would say Tine was his first love but THEN he proceeded to snatch my wig with saying that what he felt for Pam was nothing like what he felt for Tine that day at the concert and being so ridiculously OFFENDED when Tine said he and Pam were alike he was like wHAt?? you are like her??? PLEASE YOU ARE THE WEIRDEST PERSON I’VE EVER MET AND I LOVE YOU PLS NEVER LEAVE ME

AND THEN TINE BREAKS DOWN COMPLETELY AT THE END THINKING HE’S LOST WAT LIKE FULL ON SOBBING AND HITTING THE WALL AND SHAKING HIS HEAD IN DENIAL AND I AM NOT OK

WHO LET ME WATCH THAT

I NEED A HUG

TINE NEEDS A HUG

anyway, I am fine

next episode looks like it’s gonna be choked full of some of my favourite tropes and honestly I canNOT wait

but dont forget that happy ending though OK??????

#bl drama #2gether the series

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heyimtavia · 5 years

Text

THE POST FINALE HENRY DANGER OPINIONS TAG:

Hey party people! Sorry I’ve been a bit out of the loop. Due to what’s going on in the world, adulting sorta got in the way and I have to DVR the final episode. No one tagged me, but I just wanted to add my two cents since this is officially the end and this is a really cute tag.

1. Who was your overall favorite member of Team Danger and why?

Charlotte hands down. She was brilliant, sassy and just a great friend to Henry no matter what. She’s one of the main reasons why I decided to tune into the show. I saw a lot of myself in her. I was once that little smart black girl that no one listened too. But it’s okay though, but that GLOW UP is real! I know from experience lol.

2. Who was your favorite non-team danger character and why?

Y'all know I love Fran the security guard. She should’ve gotten more air time. I just think she’s hilarious! I’d loved to see her try to wrestle a dolphin any day!

3. Who was your favorite villain and why?

Dr. Minyak & Nurse Cohort. I just gotta respect his hustle. Other than Rex and Rick Twitler, I feel like he’s the only everyday villain who always came close to defeating Captain Man & Kid Danger. He always had unique plans; from capturing and brain-altering Charlotte to taking Piper and the man fan hostage, he was always creative. Plus I love his little temper tantrums he sometimes throws.

4. What were your top five favorite Henry Danger episodes of all time and why?

1) All time Fav would go to The Great Cactus Con. From the dopeyness of how everyone can do a backflip instead of Ray. How Charlotte gets to show off her fashion design skills. How Piper unofficially works with Team Danger. Plus I love the cute romantic bit between Jasper and Patina. 2) Rumblr- That whole episode was just comedy gold for me. They should’ve brought Kyle back for the finale and had him show up at kid danger’s funeral 3) I dream of Danger - Its Char’s episode. I like how it alluded to Charlotte’s dream might come true but it doesn’t. However, I don’t like how they just moved on like the episode never happened even when Jasper thinks that char likes him. 4) Flabber Gassed- I love that char got to show off her fighting skills and how happy Jasper was to be a superhero. 5) Holey Moley- I straight up die for laughter every time I see that episode. I love how Henry kept saying, “oh look, a downside.” I feel like that episode would have been a sketch on All That or the Amanda Show. It just felt like good ole Nickelodeon comedy.

5. What were your top five least favorite Henry Danger episodes of all time and why?

1) Henry’s Birthday- Call me a diva, but if anyone treated me like that on my birthday, the party is OVER! 2) Captain Makini (I think that's what it’s called). Sorry, I'm not really a fan of Frankie Grande and though he was great for the musical, I really don’t think he needed a second episode. 3) Meet Cute Crush- I’m sorry, anything involving Piper is just physical and emotionally draining. All that girl does is yell. Thank u, next. 4) Sick & Wired- Because I got sick and tired of Ray’s shenanigans. 5) JAM Session- Now Piper isn’t my favorite character, but how that girl was manipulated all over a bet was just stupid and disrespectful.

6. What was your favorite running gag and why?

1) Fran’s line, “There’s only one in the whole world, and we got it!” Swellview must be a fun, mysterious place that always gets amazing things lol. 2) When everyone says “Click” before hanging up their phone. I find it funny because I’m pretty sure the kids had never owned a flip phone in their lives.

7. What was your favorite one-off throw away gag and why?

When shwoz referenced his song from the musical when he said, “Science, science, science, I’ve said this already.” I think he said this in Theranos boot. And also the grammar fights and how grammar rules don’t apply to Charlotte lol.

8. What episode, which character and which duo made you laugh the most?

I think Holey Moley & Rumblr both made me laugh the most. Those were great episodes. Jasper would have to be the funniest. That boy says the darndest things lol. Hensper. Because of how Henry loved Jasper’s mustache and wanted to get one too. And when Jasper and Henry were both “Dude. Bro. Dude. Bro. DUDE!” Over the Patina situation and Charlotte had to break them up.

9. What episode, which character and which duo made you the most emotional?

I think it was Second episode of the finale episodes, when Henry was freaking out at the end because he was alone and Rex had sent Ray A Million and one years into the past. The fact that he literally had to think like all of his friends because obviously that’s what he was used to, everyone being there to help figure out a plan and keep swellview safe. And the fact that for that moment he was kid danger and all alone was really scary for him.

10. How would you rank each season from 1 to 5, one being the best and five being the worst?

I would rank season 5 as 1. It overall had great episodes and delved into different genres and fun tv and movie tropes. It made it a joy to watch, though some episodes leading towards the end didn’t quite catch me. Season 4 would be like a high 4 but not exactly a 5. Season 3 was sorta Meh to me. So maybe a #. Season 2 would be a 4 and season 1 would be like a 4 because it was a the beginning to a great show and was still working out the kinks a bit.

11. Who was your favorite duo in the show (romantic or non-romantic)?

Chenry 100%. The friendship that those two have is great! Now I must say, I hate that Nick was still posting about them on their youtube page for clout knowing that it wasn’t gonna happen. I felt like they did that just so people would watch the final episodes. I was gonna watch regardless, but really Nick? Really?

12. What was your favorite Henry and Ray moment/episode?

The bro song! Plus I love that it kept getting referenced after the musical as well.

13. What was your favorite Chenry moment/episode?

When Char was controlling Henry in flabber gassed, she made him jump up and down while clapping! I love that even shwoz joined in too lol. And when Henry was concerned about her after she ate bad meat from the auto snacker.

14. What was your favorite Hensper moment/episode?

The mustache scene from Grand Theft Otto, “dude if I had one, I’d be Man Danger!”

15. What was your favorite Chensper moment/episode?

This also kinda includes Ray but when they were all stealing Joss Ross’s gift from her birthday party and they were just casually leaving. And how Jasper kept saying, “It’s not stealing if it’s from a criminal.” Plus I like the episode when Hen and Char have to pretend to date just to see if Jasper would keep their secret. The boy poured a whole bowl of pees down his shirt lmaoooo!!

16. If you could go back and change one element of the show, what would it be?

Have Ray grow up and stop fawning over Henry’s mom. It was just plain creepy! Oh and put some respect on my girl Charlotte’s name.

17. If you could say one thing to each main character in the pilot, what would it be?

Life isn’t always about one day getting a statue, (I’m looking at YOU Captain Man). Crime-fighting is fun and being a sidekick could literally every kid’s dream. But don’t forget to be a kid. Hangout with your friends, go to school, go on dates. Do the whole growing up thing. But at the end of the day, you have to do what’s best for you.

18. If you could say one thing to each main character in the finale, what would it be?

Thank you for sharing your lives with me and I am so so sooo proud of you all!

19. Were you satisfied with the finale? What part was your favorite and what part was your least favorite?

Honestly, I think it was okay for what it was. My fav part was when Jasper literally had to carry Char out of the mancave because she refused to leave Henry behind. I love that they decided to stick together. They did leave a lot of storylines open. I thought Joss Moss would be revealed as the real Mob boss. I thought Rick Twitler would regain his memory. Where the heck is Gooch? Caitlin? Chenry (for obvious reasons). I'm just spitballing here. Was it good? Yes. could it have been better? Hell yes.

20. What would your ideal Henry danger spin off look like?

Charlotte and Henry have powers and Jasper can fight! Dystopia. That was the spin-off that I wanted! I don’t really care about the new kids as much. They’re college-aged too? Just imagine the shenanigans they would get into! But we need to kick the Charlotte hating writer off the staff though. Can The CW pick this show up?

21. Where do you personally see the characters 10 years from now? What are they doing, who are they with, where are they in their lives - what do you think happened to them? Most importantly, are they happy?

I honestly haven’t thought about it. But I believe no matter what they do or where they may end up, they will be happy. They’ll probably always be a team.

22. What was your favorite part of the show and why did it initially draw you in?

It became an escape from my normal adult life. (I’m saying like I’m old. I’m only 23.) I randomly flipped it on one day, I can't remember what episode it was, but from then on, I was hooked. I used to watch it a while back, but I fell off, but at that moment on time, it was easy for me to fall right back into it.

23. What was your favourite part of the fandom and why did it initially draw you in?

The friends I’ve made, the people have met! They are the best out of all the fandoms I’m a part of. I’ve been on tumblr for years and never had I have a group of people be so nice, supportive and just incorporate me into things. I love you guys so much!

24. Describe your overall emotions/feelings regarding the show being over and the show in general, looking back on it as a whole, with one quote from the show.

It’s a bittersweet feeling. I hate to see it go. But all good things must come to an end. But I guess there’s nothing better to say than, “Feels Good.”

25. If you were able to add one scene in the finale, what would you add?

I don’t know honestly. Maybe we could have seen him reunite with his friends and family. Especially Charlotte and Jasper, Afterall, they probably thought that their best friend was dead for all they knew.

26. Favorite outfit/hair style?

Charlotte’s Date outfit with Jack Swagger. Sis was rockin that romper. Also when Jasper and Charlotte were helper bunnies! Those outfits were hilarious and cute.

27.Least favorite character?

I'm sorry but Piper. She was worse than the whole annoying little sister trope. I swear all ash did was yell through most of the seasons and then they gave this chick a driver’s license, I mean what?? Plus i think her reaction to finding out Henry was kid danger was better in Broken Armed and Dangerous, than in twisted sister.

28. What is question you would like to ask the writers/ producers?

Im tagging @adorkable-blackgirl @chenoahchantel

#henry danger #hd spoliers #hd tag game #hd

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journalisticdreams · 4 years

Text

The false binary of ambition vs love that plagues female protagonists

As an avid viewer of the Rom-com genre (and of movies in general) I thoroughly enjoy watching movies that feature a headstrong, feminist protagonist navigating her way through high school or her career alongside dealing with potential friendship, familial or relationship issues... and absolutely crushing it. However, too many of these movies start off with a tough, career woman and end with her being ��tamed’ after finding a man – resulting in her losing her tenacity and essentially becoming more ‘palatable’.

So how is the ambition vs love binary used in movies, and why is it so toxic?

According to theorist Steve Neale’s Repetition and Difference theory, all genres contain examples of repetition and difference – the differences being essential to the economy of the genre. Movies must conform to the genre’s conventions in order to be identified as part of that genre, but they must also subvert these conventions to be considered unique. Therefore according to this theory, individual genres must have similar themes and tropes which allow the audience to determine whether they will enjoy a certain movie. An easy example to identify is in superhero movies, which all contain the genre’s stereotypical dichotomy of good vs evil.

You may be asking: why is this relevant? This is relevant as most Rom-coms tend to conform to the same toxic stereotype which often undermines any feminist messages that they try to put out; the ambition vs love dichotomy.

The ‘ambition vs love dichotomy’ (well, false dichotomy) refers to the opposition of being successful and determined and being or falling in love, that we see many female protagonists battle with in Rom-coms. According to the genre, being ‘tough’ or ambitious in your career and being in love is mutually exclusive; you’ve got as much chance seeing Ironman and Tony Stark in a room together (get it? Because they’re the same person it’s impossible…)

A prime example of this is the movie ‘The Proposal’. The movie stars Sandra Bullock playing the ‘ruthless’ boss Margaret Tate firing people left, right and centre and taking any and every step to advance in her career. However, the movie portrays this as downright unacceptable (how could a woman possibly act just as her male counterparts do in order to become successful) and proceeds to make finding Margaret’s ‘dream man’ a priority in order to domesticate this harsh woman. Yes, it’s as outdated and misogynistic as that synopsis sounds.

Not only does it promote the convention that women can only have a man or be successful / strong willed and tough, this is one of the many movies that falls into the medieval ideology of ‘the taming of the shrew’. This ideology is based of the Shakespearean play of the same name, which concludes that in the end the unrelenting, stubborn woman needs a man to domesticate her so she can become more accepted by society – now do you see why this dichotomy in mainstream media is harmful?

On the other hand, there are examples out there that debase this false binary successfully, and try to maintain the female empowerment that many Rom-coms lack. An example of this is ‘10 Things I Hate About You’ – which was actually ironically inspired by ‘The Taming Of The Shrew’. Kat Stratford (played by Julia Stiles) is an outspoken, blunt feminist who isn’t afraid to go against social norms and defy what is expected of her. Though some may deem her and the love interest Patrick Verona’s love story as ‘anti-feminist’ (as he originally only dates her as he is being paid to do so; and despite Kat finding this information out, she proceeds to date him after he confesses that he’s fallen for her) by the end of the movie in the ‘new equilibrium’, despite being ‘loved up’ with her man, Kat is still as tenacious and outspoken as she was to begin with – falling in love hasn’t been succeeded in her becoming more docile and demure. As a result, Kat Stratford subverts this ‘ambition vs love’ dichotomy and remains to this day one of my favourite feminist protagonists.

So to conclude, mainstream media has produced some examples which undermine these outdated and sexist ideals that women cannot be strong willed and maintain a healthy relationship (if desired) yet needs to do more to promote more modern, realistic plots that feature tough, feminist protagonists – similar to the other movie and societal stereotype that women need to be married with children to feel fulfilled. Why is it acceptable for men to be portrayed as harsh and career orientated, yet the women who are in the same situations are ‘broken’ because they don’t have a man to pacify them? All I ask is that movies do more to reverse these gender roles, and stop limiting women to either being the complicit, innocent ‘girl next door’ or the overly sexualised ‘object’.

Have you got any other examples of movies which either conform or subvert these stereotypes? Feel free to share your opinions in the comments!

#movies #movie commentary #media #mainstream media #feminism #10 things i hate about you #the proposal #false binary #dichotomy #ambition vs love #misogyny

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klaineccfanficlibrary · 6 years

Note

that fake-dating fic u just posted looks so good - do you have any other fav fics like that where they pretend to date ??

Hey Nonnie, oh yes, I do. It’s my favourite trope, so I know lots of pretend relationship fics :-) Please find a list below. Hugs, Marjan

01 Attachment by @caramelcoffeeaddict/CoffeeAddict80

Blaine’s co-workers are constantly trying to set him up on blind dates. To get them off his back, he tells them he already has a boyfriend. They insist he brings the boyfriend to the office Holiday party.

A Little Confession by @sheepassisted/Fyrmaiden

Blaine suggests that he and Kurt could earn some easy money by taking part in a psychology study that he found the flyer for. Kurt isn’t sure, and it doesn’t go quite as planned.

All I Need by @blainesdevon/hwespn

“I think you should kiss me,” Kurt spoke softly but with a bit of teasing in his voice, “y'know, just in case that guy is watching."

A Real Keeper by @whatstheproblembaby

Prompt: kurt and blaine are just friends but to go to a family reunion one of them (doesnt matter which) needs to have a date.

A Thanksgiving Arrangement by @alilactree

Afraid to admit he was just dumped, Kurt hires an actor to play his lawyer boyfriend during the Thanksgiving holiday at his parents’ house.

Collapse by @somethingfishyfan/morethanwords

Coffee in hand, Kurt virtually collapsed into his chair at his local coffee shop. He’d lied to his father about having a boyfriend.. and now his whole world was about to come crashing in around him. He was in trouble. Unless Blaine would agree to help him out?

Delusions of Grandeur by portmanteaux

AU where Blaine and Kurt didn’t meet until after college in New York. Rachel unexpectedly sees Jesse at work and gets herself into a sticky situation. She needs a fake boyfriend, and Blaine is too nice to say no. Kurt and Blaine (and Jesse) manage to get a little jealous in the process. Nothing too explicit or heavy, largely tongue-in-cheek. Originally written as part of a longer story, but I think it works better as a standalone.

Fake Relationship by @nineofhearts4

movie stars!Kurt and Blaine

False Marriage; True Love by @gleekforkurt

Blaine Anderson is a hot shot music producer who was discovered at a young age. Now he runs his music comopany in New York City; his office building right across the hallway from Vogue’s. Blaine has a problem, he is about to be deported back to Italy. One day Blaine and his team come up with an idea to have Blaine get married in order to save his citizenship. Blaine isn’t excited about the idea, but that soon changes when he bumps into a chestnut haired boy after work one day.

Father Knows Best by @nadiacreek

To avoid being forced into arranged marriages, best friends Blaine and Kurt decide to pretend they’re already married — to each other.

Finally Found the Boy by @whatstheproblembaby

Based off my tags on this Tumblr post: #okay but combine all four: person a works at a coffeeshop #person b works at a flowershop #they start fake dating to cover for person a who’s lied to their parents about meeting their soulmate #but then they do whatever thing reveals soulmates while fake dating and start REAL DATING #THE END

Instant Boyfriend by @scrapmom2112

One minute Kurt is having coffee and minding his own business and the next he has a boyfriend…what? AU. Just another way for Kurt and Blaine to meet, and it’s at the Lima Bean, of course.

Klaine Advent 2016 by @slayediest/notarelationship (just practising)

A collection of Klaine Romance drabbles for the 2016 Klaine Advent.

Kurt and Blaine Wake Up Married by @seeroftodayandtomorrow

A drunk marriage in Vegas, a divorce temporarily out of the question and his new husband someone he’s been a fan of forever: Blaine Anderson’s week just got a lot more exciting. If only he wasn’t still so hung up on his ex…

life is a song (i want you to sing to me) by @luthien82

AU-ish - Kurt and Blaine have been best friends since college. They would do anything for each other, which Blaine proves when Kurt confesses he has to go home for a wedding - a wedding where everyone expects him to bring his long time boyfriend. The thing is: Kurt doesn’t have one. But he has a Blaine, who is willing to help. Enter one group of crazy, well meaning friends, a week full of wedding preparations, and lots of sexual tension and you’ve got yourself a mix that’s just bound to blow up in their faces…

Loving Arms by @heartsmadeofbooks/LauGS

Desperate times call for desperate measures. When Blaine’s heart gets broken again just before he was supposed to introduce his boyfriend to his entire family, he is too humiliated to show up alone at the Andersons’ doorstep. Cue Kurt Hummel, a beautiful prostitute with nothing left to lose and a farce that will change their lives.

Lucky by @antarcticbird

Blaine needs a little help and Kurt is there. That’s how it all starts.

Make the Yuletide Gay by @razorsharpquill (WIP, Klaine Advent 2018)

When the invitation comes, Blaine Anderson is delighted – he can’t think of a better way to usher in the holidays than an impromptu Warbler reunion to celebrate one of their own getting married. Unfortunately that includes ALL of the Warblers, including his ex-boyfriend Sebastian. Avoiding the ex might just call for drastic measures – and Blaine knows just the man for the job. [Written for Klaine Advent 2018.]

Marriage in Dignity by Verseau_87

Kurt and Blaine grew up in rich families. Both from a long line of rich family names, they decided to marry each other when they were teenagers, to further themselves. Their marriage is a sham, they aren’t in love…but when tragedy strikes, it throws them together in a strange way, then suddenly their marriage seems to be working…hmm

Mystery Man by @alexwhitney

Kurt’s date to his boss’ Christmas party, who he’s been telling everyone about, doesn’t show up. Blaine decides to act like he and Kurt were supposed to be each other’s date, so Kurt won’t be embarrassed in front of his boss and coworkers.

Only Pretending (Or Not At All) by @little-escapist

Kurt gets an invitation to a New Directions reunion, but he’s not sure he wants to go: he’s the only one not in a relationship. His roommate Blaine gets an idea - he can pretend to be Kurt’s boyfriend for a week!

Kurt is doubtful, because he happens to be in love with his roommate, but he agrees. He can have this one last thing, maybe he’ll get to kiss Blaine, and then he will move on from Blaine for good.

Play Pretend by @nineofhearts4

Kurt has spent the better part of the last five years half in love with his best friend Blaine. What will happen when Blaine has to get married in order to inherit his grandparents money?

Portraits by @ungoodpirate

“I need you to be my pretend boyfriend.”

Blaine nearly chokes. “You need me to be your pretend boyfriend.” What the hell kind of request was that? And how ready Blaine would be to say yes if only the word ‘pretend’ was struck out.

Kurt sighs in understanding of how ridiculous and rom-com the request sounds. With a chagrined smile he replies, “Yes.”

The Band by @crownofsilverstars

Kurt, Blaine, Brittany, and Santana were born years earlier. It wasn’t acceptable to be gay, so they made a pact with one another. They would use each other to hide who they really loved. Oh, and they also formed a band, got famous, and had kids.

The Endless Tango of Love and Money by @seeroftodayandtomorrow

When Kurt Hummel hires escort Blaine Anderson to play his boyfriend at a family gathering, he sets in motion a chain of events that ends up with them living together for a year, posing as boyfriends, and struggling with jealous relatives, dancing, money, and love.

Once again inspired by, and very loosely based on a German novel I read a long time ago.

The Right Man for the Job by @trickydeepforest

There is no way that Kurt is going to Tina’s wedding still single. He doesn’t want to give Adam the chance to say ‘I told you so’. He thought about hiring someone from one of those services, but there’s a fellow student at NYADA that might fill the role better.

They’re to remind you I love you by @kloffee

After Kurt and Blaine break up, they pretend to be a couple at Rachel and Finn’s Christmas party.

They say the key to a happy marriage is to marry your best friend by SinceWhenDoIWriteFanfic

Blaine Anderson realizes that, in order to access his trust fund, he needs to be married for an entire year. Luckily, his best friend is always willing to play along with whatever plans he thinks of. Based off of a GKM prompt.

Those Summer Nights by @thelilacfield

Kurt Hummel and Rachel Berry are the power couple of Hollywood, madly in love and smiling for the cameras. But in private, their marriage is one of convenience and friendship. Until Rachel decides to hire a young and gorgeous pool boy and Kurt starts to wonder if he wants this for the rest of his life.

Through the good time and the bad, you’re the best I never had by @daydreamerlily

Kurt gets invited at his high school reunion and he doesn’t have a date. Fortunately for him Blaine has a solution: he’ll be his plus one. The fact that he’s had a crush on his long time best friend could mess everything up… or maybe not.

Truth Time by @antarcticbird

luckyjak prompted: Klaine, pretending to be dating before actually dating. :)

Walking on Sunshine by @somethingfishyfan/morethanwords

It’s Burt and Carole’s wedding anniversary party and Kurt needs to find a boyfriend to take home with him, fast… oh, and preferably one who’s called Blaine Anderson.

What Is This Feeling? by @whatstheproblembaby

Fake dating AU. Kurt needs a date to his work party, and Blaine volunteers. This turns out pretty danged well for him.

#klaine fanfiction #fake relationship #fic finder #klaine #Klaine fanfic

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scripttorture · 7 years

Text

Torture in Fiction: Captain America, The Winter Soldier

With its superb fight scenes and stand out performances by a talented cast, this movie is a fan favourite and cornerstone of the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

I don’t think you’re going to like what I have to say about it.

So I’m going to start with the little disclaimer I have for this series as a quick reminder.

Once again I’m rating the depiction and use of torture, not the movie itself. I’m trying to take into account realism (regardless of fantasy or sci fi elements), presence of any apologist arguments, stereotypes and the narrative treatment of victims and torturers.

If you are in any way upset by my analysis of this movie or its characters I advise you to consider both the impact fictional depictions of torture have in real life and Rule 6 before you respond.

On to the movie-

The relevant plot details are, well, most of the film. I’ll try to be as brief as I can.

Steve Roger’s (aka Captain America) boss at SHIELD (Nick Fury) is assassinated by a mysterious man known as ‘The Winter Soldier’. Before dying Nick tells Steve that SHIELD itself has been compromised and gives him a usb.

On refusing to hand over the usb Steve is attacked by a large group of his former colleges in a lift.

He escapes and teams up with Natasha Romanov aka the Black Widow. Together they discover that SHIELD has been infiltrated by Hydra, a Nazi organisation who are particularly interested in SHIELD’s latest weapons project which they could use to kill millions.

The Winter Soldier, a character who is heavily coded as mentally ill, is ordered to assassinate them by Hydra.

Steve and Natasha track down a SHIELD/Hydra agent and threaten him with death or grievous bodily harm unless he gives them information. They get the information they want.

They clash with the Winter Soldier and during the scuffle he is unmasked and revealed as Steve’s long lost wartime friend Bucky Barnes. Steve, Natasha and their friend Sam are all captured by Hydra.

The audience is told that Bucky, apparently now a super-soldier, was captured by Hydra, tortured and brainwashed. He has been their best assassin for decades. A scene of his memory being ‘wiped’ follows with props that are heavily reminiscent of ECT machines.

Steve, Natasha and Sam stage an assault on SHIELD HQ in an effort to stop the launch of the new weapons. In the process Steve takes over the comm system and announces Hydra’s plan to the entire base.

Two sympathetic characters are shown resisting Hydra demands when threatened with death. One of them dies for his trouble.

Steve and Bucky fight until the last weapon is disarmed. With the threat of civilian casualties gone Steve refuses to fight Bucky and tries instead to appeal to his humanity, asking him to remember their friendship. Bucky beats him unconscious but stops short of killing him.

I’m giving it 0/10

The Good

And well that really is the problem: with regards to torture I cannot think of more than one good thing about this film. Usually I’d throw the movie at least one point for a single good scene, but in this case I think the scene is part of a larger entirely negative trend in the narrative.

1) The scene I’m thinking of is the attack on Steve in the lift. About eight or nine people, all armed in various ways, attack Steve at once. His arms are pinned by several people each while he’s repeatedly shocked with a device a bit like a cattle prod. This basic set up is extremely true to life for many cases of police brutality, although a Taser would have been a more likely weapon.

The Bad

Where to begin?

1) Every major ‘good’ character in this movie engages in torture.

Our heroes Steve, Sam and Natasha torture a Hydra agent for information by threatening to kill him, then throwing him off a building (Sam catches him before he falls to his death).

This is not just portrayed as good and reasonable but it is played for laughs. The scene is used to extend a joke about Steve’s dating life.

2) The ‘good guys’ obtain accurate, timely, relevant information through torture. This never happens in real life. Torture cannot force someone to give accurate, timely or relevant information. And it’s a stereotype in fiction that I particularly despise because it has been linked to the justification of and practice of torture in real life.

3) The ‘bad guy’ they torture does not resist once they have tortured him. This is extremely unlikely. The data we have at the moment suggests that torture makes people far more likely to resist.

4) This stands in contrast to the way ‘good’ characters act when threatened with death or torture. The film consistently shows ‘good’ people resisting torture and ‘bad’ (or in Bucky’s case mentally ill) people complying under torture. This is not only wrong; it’s frankly sickening and perpetuates extremely harmful stereotypes about victims and torture.

5) Brainwashing does not work and is a central, important plot device in the film. The story simply does not work unless violence, torture and pain can ‘force’ a victim to change sides.

6) Torture cannot change hearts and minds. It cannot force someone to support or work for a cause they are strongly against.

7) Memory really does not work in the way the film suggests. Anything that could remove old, strongly held memories, such as those of childhood or the victim’s name, would also have removed their memory of how to drive a car, fight hand to hand, use a gun or virtually anything else Bucky does in the film.

8) Even accounting for the sci-fi idea of removing specific memories, torture and pain would not force a victim to comply with their captors. In fact it makes resistance more likely. A Bucky Barnes without the memory of his friends or the war would still almost certainly resist Hydra simply because they caused him pain.

9) There has never been a recorded case of ECT machines being used to torture. They have been used as a form of abuse in some hospitals but they have never been used by military or terrorist organisations such as Hydra. This is another inaccurate stereotype: the idea that torture is ‘scientific’ or ‘high-tech’.

10) The film assumes that a victim of systematic abuse over decades would be physically and mentally capable of complex assassinations. Instead the sort of damage to both physical and mental health this would inflict means that Bucky and Natasha should both be noticeably less capable than their colleagues. Instead they are more capable than their colleagues, implying that abuse made them ‘better’ at committing wanton acts of violence.

11) Both this film and other Marvel films state that Natasha has both suffered and committed abuse, yet she shows no severe symptoms. This seems to be narratively linked to the idea that she is ‘strong’. And I detest the notion that a basic, bodily reaction to trauma makes victims weak.

Overview

I think the word for this movie’s use of torture is ‘dire’.

It’s not just consistently wrong.

It’s not just based around an impossible, trope laden premise.

It’s not just running through a check list of every harmful stereotype that regularly turns up in fiction.

The movie supports the notion that the torture of ‘bad people’ does not ‘count’.

It shows ‘heroes’, particularly individuals that the audience is supposed to think are morally above reproach, engaging in torture and the plot supports and justifies their doing so. It tells us that really ‘good’, ‘pure’ characters, such as the titular hero, threaten ‘bad guys’ with torture and then stand back to watch their friends do the torturing.

It shows victims (ie Bucky) as dangerous and violent and without other symptoms. It shows torturers like Natasha as without symptoms. It shows torture as a successful interrogation tactic and shows torture fundamentally changing hearts and minds.

Even accounting for sci-fi elements, the movie’s attitude to and treatment of torture is consistently false, dangerous and fundamentally against the basic principles of human rights.

Human rights are not for ‘good people’. They are for everyone. Whatever their race, gender, creed, politics, or crime. Torture is never justified.

And for that reason this movie’s treatment of torture is quite possibly the worst I’ve ever seen. It is a shining example of how much torture apologia pervades popular culture.

This, readers, is how not to write torture.

Disclaimer

#tw torture #torture in fiction #Captain America The Winter Soldier #Marvel #Marvel Cinematic Universe #brainwashing does not work #memory #electrical torture #torturers #behaviour of torturers #psychological effects of torture #apologist arguments #torture apologia #justification of torture in pop culture

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coffeeandcas · 7 years

Text

So @loudenswainfangirl gave me this prompt for my tropes series: “how about a Benny/Dean pairing in a cop/detective story? Could lead to a hurt/comfort. Just a thought.”

And, almost 10k words later, this is what I came up with... (Warnings: Dom/Sub play, bondage, sub drop.) AO3 link right here.

Dean Winchester’s sassy, arrogant, over-confident swagger lasts the entire way from the front door to the water cooler: all of ten feet. As he reaches for a plastic cup, parched and dying for a drink thanks to the mid-July Louisiana sun, a voice booms out across the room and his hand freezes in midair. Shit. Oh, shit. What has he done now?

“Winchester? Winchester! Where the hell is he? There you are, boy, where the hell have you been? Don't you know to come when you hear ya damn name?” The Deputy has a low, smooth, rumbling type of voice which is normally cool and charming, just the right side of pleasant. But now? Now it's loaded with ire an directed right at Dean. “Get here, boy. Now.”

Everyone is staring. Absolutely everyone. Every pair of eyes is on him, and Dean gets the feeling they all know something he doesn't. He turns to see Deputy Lafitte standing in the door to his office, glowering in his direction and looking thunderous. The whine he was building up to of ‘but Sir, I'm about to clock off’ dies in his throat as he sees the man’s normally calm demeanour has vanished and, instead, he radiates fury. Oh crap. Seriously, what has he done this time? This is only his third week and already he's had two ass-whoopings. A third ain't going to look so good on his record. He hangs his head and walks like a man condemned, feeling the gaze of every other officer, detective and technician on him like spotlights. The Deputy waits until he's safely inside the confines of the small, sparsely decorated office before closing the door firmly and crossing the room to take his place at his desk. Dean stands, nervous but trying valiantly to keep his mask of confidence in place, and goes for a smile.

“You wanted to see me, boss?”

“Sit yourself down, Winchester. Now. And drop the charm, I ain't bitin’.” The Deputy’s voice is slow and drawling, and he's leaning back in his chair to watch every move Dean makes as he sits down in the chair indicated to him.

“Have I… done something? Boss?” It's a failed attempt at sweetening the mood, and Deputy Benny Lafitte sees straight through it. Lord knows this isn't the first impudent, freshly-graduated kid he's had stroll through his doors thinking he knows it all. Dean has heard plenty of stories from the other guys about new kids on the block only lasting a week or two. He so very badly doesn't want to be another name to add to that list. He sits up a little straighter and tries to tidy himself up; polite, slightly nervous smile plastered on, hands together in his lap… he's pulling every trick he knows. And by the narrowed eyes and raised brow of his Deputy, Lafitte isn't falling for it, not for a single second.

“Where's your report on the Collins case?” Benny asks him quietly, almost casually, and Dean’s stomach drops into his boots. Oh fuck. The Collins case is high-profile and he had been over the moon to be allowed to tag along with it. Two senior officers, Detectives Mills and Bradbury had been in charge of the homicide investigation and had grudgingly allowed Dean to write up part of their report. The report that was due an hour ago. And where has he left it?

“Um. It's on my desk at home, boss. But I can go get it right now, I'll only be a half hour-”

“Stop.” Deputy Lafitte raises a hand, palm facing Dean, and shakes his head in apparent despair. “Why is it on your desk at home and not on my desk in front of my nose?”

“Because… I… um…” Dean doesn't have an answer. He stares down at his hands, feeling his cheeks flush, humiliated. He's angry and disappointed in himself for forgetting something so elementary, and the Deputy is now angry and disappointed in him, too. Great.

Deputy Lafitte sighs and pushes his chair back from the desk. “Stand up, Dean.” He does, nervously. The look in Benny’s eyes is familiar, and it sends a spark of excitement pulsing through him, tangling up with his disappointment in himself and nervousness over what might happen to him.

The Deputy moves behind him and Dean tenses, heart in his throat. A warm hand comes to the back of his neck then moves down, fingers light along his spine.

“What am I gonna do with you, Dean?” Warm breath caresses his ear and Dean shivers. “You gotta learn, boy, to get yourself organised. I ain't chasin’ ya, and neither is anyone else. Got it?”

Dean nods, and a second later Benny’s hand comes down sharply on his ass and he lets a yelp slip out. “Sorry, boss. Yes, boss. I got it.”

“Good. You fuck up again, and I hear about it? I'll beat your ass until you can't sit down, you get me?” Dean nods frantically, trying valiantly to ignore the pulse of heat that goes straight to his groin at the suggestion. “Now, when will I see that report?”

“First thing tomorrow, boss.” Dean is staring straight ahead, body a firm line of tension as Benny steps in closer, right up into his personal space. Then his arm is taken and he's spun around to face the Deputy, and the look in his eyes is very different now.

“Good. Now, I got a question for you, cher.” Benny backs Dean up against the wall, raising one arm to rest by Dean’s head, effectively boxing him in with his body. “I'll give you a choice. When you leave my office, this conversation is over. You've been slapped on the wrist: it needn't go further than that, and hopefully you've learned your lesson about turnin’ in your reports on time. I clock off in fifteen, you clock off in thirty: I can either take you out for dinner and you can tell me about your third week working here over a bottle of wine, then we can go back to your place for… dessert.” Dean’s breathing accelerates as Benny’s voice lowers, and he feels his body respond to the Deputy’s suggestion. Yes, that sounds incredible. “Or…” Oh. He likes the sound of or. “You come over to my place as soon as your shift ends, and I can… drive today’s lesson home, so to speak. Punish you for your mishap, and make sure you don't commit a repeat offence.” Benny leans in close, pressing his whole body up against Dean, and the heat between them is building rapidly. Dean’s heart is pounding in his ears. “I wanna scene with you, boy. Remind you who you belong to and what's expected of you.” He kisses Dean then, on the mouth, firm but sweet. “But it's up to you, cher. I want whatever you want. You know that.”

Old words float to the forefront of Dean’s mind: The sub holds the power, sugar. One word from you, and everythin’ stops. You're in control here, not me. He swallows, hard, allowing Benny to kiss him again as his body responds in excitement.

“Would you just be happy with just dinner, though?” Dinner and dessert, of course. He murmurs into the Deputy’s mouth and Benny sighs, pulling back.

“Don't insult me, sugar. You know I want you for more than your body.”

Dean nods; he does know. He just forgets sometimes. I want whatever you want. It's true, Benny would be happy with either choice Dean makes. It's up to him. Does he want romance? Or punishment…? He's about to answer when Benny presses a gentle finger to his lips to quiet him.

“Don't decide now. Go back to your desk, and think about it.” He leans in again; Benny’s mouth brushes Dean’s ear, and a full-body shiver runs down his spine. His next words make Dean’s mouth run dry and his brain short-circuits.

“All I need to know is whether you want me in a dinner jacket tonight… Or in leather…”

He doesn't have a clue what to expect tonight as he pulls up outside Benny’s sprawling two-storey house on the outskirts of town. Sometimes when he goes there, the scene starts as soon as he steps through the door, while other times they will chat and discuss what Benny has planned and Dean will add or subtract anything he has an opinion on. Today? Today he has no idea what awaits him inside the comfort of Benny’s home.

They've been seeing each other for months. They met while Dean was still at the Academy, and had hooked up a few days later. A week after that they started dating and in the months that followed Benny introduced him more and more to the world of BDSM, something Dean had little familiarity with. His trust in Benny is implicit, because they're more than just Deputy and Officer. More than just fuck buddies. There are feelings between them, usually unspoken and left to burn gently under the heat of their passion, but they both know they're there. Dean feels it in Benny’s kisses, in the way he's so gentle with him after a scene, and in the way he holds his hand while they walk together into the precinct some mornings. He hopes he conveys it right back to Benny in soft smiles and even softer embraces, things he isn't familiar with and hasn't done before. Well, that was before Benny.

He gets out of the car and locks it, heading for the door and attempting to keep his nerves at bay. Although he trusts Benny with his life, he’s always anxious before a scene. Nervous that he won't be good enough or that he’ll fuck up. Worried that this is the time Benny will decide he doesn't want him any more and ask him to leave. But that's part of why they scene: when Dean is lost to pleasure and submission, he forgets all about the self-doubt and anxiety that plagues him on the daily, and just lets himself feel. He can be himself in those moments, can enjoy what he used to think was forbidden, and knows he's safe in Benny’s care. Benny knows too, knows that Dean is insecure and vulnerable and hides it all under a mask of bravado, which probably explains why he goes out of his way afterwards to take care of him, and make him feel cherished and valued. Dean can't lie: the aftercare is sometimes his favourite part. Lying quietly in Benny’s strong arms while his mind is calm and still, while it's dark outside and it feels like they're the only people awake in the world, is one of his favourite things. He wishes he knew how to have it that way always.

He doesn't have to knock. The door opens before he can raise his fist, and Benny takes his hand to draw him inside and then they're kissing against the closed door. The kisses are slow, deep, languid, and Benny’s hands gently explore his waistline and caress up his back. His shirt is damp with sweat, the Louisiana heat still high at the end of the day, and he's sure he could do with a shower. He's also sure that the Deputy doesn't give a damn.

“Mmm, I've been looking forward to this, mon cher,” Benny breathes into his mouth. “I've missed tasting your mouth.”

“I'm sure I spent the night on Monday,” Dean’s mouth is released as Benny goes for his neck, and he clutches at the other man to hold him close. This is what he wants. Benny, near him and all over him, wanting him and desiring him. But this isn't quite what he deserves right now. He deserves to be punished for what he did. Almost as though he can read his thoughts, Benny pulls back and laughs low in his threat.

“Don't worry, sugar, we’ll get you there. Have a drink first. It's too hot out, don't want you dehydrated and passin’ out on me.”

They sip water out on the decking and Benny’s hand eventually comes to the small of Dean’s back, rubbing in gentle circles: a prelude to what's coming. One thing Dean craves during a scene is contact. Constantly being touched in one way or another, and if he's left alone too long without it he always starts to struggle. Benny knows this, and ever since a couple of bad incidents back when they first started scening and Dean hadn't known his own body and mind quite well enough, the man hasn't let him down once. You're too important to me, Dean, Benny had whispered to him once when they were lying on the edge of sleep in each other's arms. I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy. To keep you safe. I… He hadn't finished his sentence and Dean hadn't asked him to, but they both knew it was the closest Benny had come to saying the big L word. Neither of them have come close to it since then, but Dean is starting to want to. One day, he tells himself. One day, one day soon…

“How are you feelin’, Dean?” Benny continues to rub his back soothingly, his voice low and liquid, like melting honey. He only ever asks that if he's got an intense scene in mind, or if he's concerned Dean is going into it in the wrong headspace. Or, more often than not, both.

“I'm fine, sir.”

“No.” Benny’s other hand comes up and he taps Dean on the chin. “I'm not sir, not yet. This is just us, cher. You and me. I'll let you know when it's time.”

And he will, Dean knows it. He shouldn't have made that slip-up to begin with; Benny is still in his cop uniform from work, and he smiling gently at Dean and stroking his back. This isn't a scene, he's right, and it was stupid of him to say that. Another gentle tap on his chin shocks him, and he twists to see Benny watching him with a carefully schooled neutral expression.

“You sure you're fine? I won't do this if you're not.”

“I am.” Dean finishes his water and hands the bottle to Benny; it vanishes somewhere, somehow, and the warm hand never leaves his back. It's comforting, and he leans into the touch. “I promise. I want this.”

“And why are you here, Dean?” The Deputy’s voice is still gentle, probing. Seeking honesty. Honesty, right, Dean can do this. This question is easy.

“I'm here to be punished. For what I did, for forgetting the report. I'm here to learn my lesson.” Benny is quiet for a heartbeat too long, and Dean realises he's screwed up. That it was the wrong answer. He realises quickly what the right one is; his voice shakes a little as he supplies it. “I'm here because I chose it.”

“You did.” Benny leans in and presses a kiss to his cheek. “And I hope you know I would have been happy goin’ for dinner, cher.”

“I know,” Dean whispers, leaning over hopefully for a kiss on the mouth; Benny obliges willingly. “But I wanted this. I wanted to play.”

“Did ya now?” Benny’s voice drops an octave and Dean’s whole body tingles. He's ready for them to start now, for their scene to begin. Thankfully, Benny seems to be on the same wavelength.

“Any new limits I should know about?” The hand on his back is insistent now, pulling him closer somehow even though Benny is right at his side. Dean smiles in spite of himself. Benny always asks him this, even if their last scene was only a few days ago. He once queried why, trying to tell the other man that he would let him know if anything changed, but had received a smile and a shake of the head in response. So he had changed tack, asking how long they need to be together before Benny stops asking, and the response had been, ‘when I've married you, sugar, and even then I'll probably still ask you’. The answer had shut Dean up then, and moments later Benny had shut him up properly for at least an hour by pushing him to his knees and pressing his cock past his lips and instructing him to practice his deep-throating skills. Dean had obliged, willingly. The memory makes him shift awkwardly, his dick perking up in interest.

“No. Nothing.” He allows himself to look up at Benny through dark lashes, hoping he looks sultry and desirable. “I want this. I need this; I need you to show me who's boss, and who I belong to.”

“Damn, boy, how did you get to be so perfect?” Benny’s hand comes to the back of his neck and he steps in, starting to kiss a gentle trail up the side of Dean’s neck. “Do you know your safe word?”

“Yes. Kansas.

“Good boy.” Benny kisses his temple. “Why did you choose that one, out of interest?”

“I don't know…” He closes his eyes and tilts his head, giving more access and enjoying the attention. But it's too much, too gentle. He doesn't want gentle right now, he wants…

“‘I don't know…’?”

“I don't know, sir.” And that's his cue. His command. Suddenly the air in the room changes and Dean's filled with a nervous thrill of excitement. Benny steps away and slaps his ass, hard.

“You were late, boy. By seven minutes. What's your excuse?”

“I left late, sir, and I…” No, wait, back up. That's not the right answer. Immediately contrite, he takes a deep breath and hangs his head. “I'm sorry, sir. I don't have an excuse.”

“So how should I handle this? Just ignore your tardiness, pretend it never happened? When I'm already punishing you for your lack of organisation?”

“No, sir. You should punish me. Please.” Dean feels his body respond to his own words; his jeans feel tighter at his groin and his temperature spikes along with his heart rate. Damn, he needs this so bad. Benny thinks for a moment before answering.

“What's seven multiplied by five?”

“Uhm…” Shit. Math isn't his strong point. “Thirty seven?”

“No.” Benny slaps his ass through his jeans again and Dean jerks at the impact. “It's thirty five. But we’ll go with your number: think you can take my hand thirty seven times?”

Yes, God yes. He loves being spanked by Benny, though he will never admit it out loud. There's something intensely erotic about being spread over the other man’s lap or being on his knees on the bed and having his ass spanked until it's cherry-red and throbbing. He loves feeling the low ache the following day. A good spanking can catapult him into subspace faster than anything else, and that's what he craves right now. The glorious sensation of letting go of his thoughts and worries and concerns, and just feeling. Letting Benny work his body over and give him exactly what he needs. He nods, then remembers the first rule Benny ever gave him: verbal answers, always, unless he's gagged - which they don't do often.

“Yes, sir. I can.”

“Good.” Benny squeezes the back of his neck gently and steps away. “Go upstairs, take your clothes off, lie on the bed on your stomach, and wait for me. Now, boy.”

Dean hadn't even realised he’d hesitated; he was too caught up in the look in Benny’s eyes, but now he moves quickly towards the stairs, heart pounding in anticipation and want, and he follows Benny’s instructions to the letter. He folds his clothes neatly, knowing he will likely be reprimanded if he just throws them anywhere, and lies down on his belly, head pillowed on his folded arms and legs just slightly spread. Just the way Benny likes him.

“Three rules tonight, boy.” Benny’s voice makes him jump; he had been drifting already, lost in the fantasies of what his dom plans to do to him. “One: verbal answers to everything. If you forget, I'll remind you once before ending the scene. Two: no swearin’. No curse words. Keep it PG, got it?” ‘Keep it PG’ - Dean almost laughs at how ironic that statement is, given what they're about to do. “Three: you get one orgasm tonight, and that's it. You can choose when you come, but if you go off the second I touch you don't expect me to give you another. You'll have to wait until the mornin’. Do you understand?”

“Yes, sir.” Dean has to try valiantly not to sound too eager. He still wants to at least pretend he isn't utterly desperate for all of this; that pretence lasts all of thirty seconds until he turns to look at Benny and his mouth goes dry. He's not Deputy Lafitte any more nor is he Benny, Dean’s sort-of boyfriend. He's Dean’s dom, and Dean feels his body respond instantly to the sight of him standing at the foot of the bed, arms folded and an appraising expression on his face. Benny has on tight leather pants that he knows feel as soft as they look, coupled with a heavy leather belt. Dean’s cock, currently pinned beneath him, twitches and thickens at the possibility of being whipped with that belt. Benny also has on a harness that crossed his broad chest and accentuates his muscles, and the finishing touch is a pair of black leather gloves that Dean knows feel exquisite during a spanking. Fuck. Tonight is going to be one to remember, he can already feel it.

Benny approaches him slowly and runs a soothing hand up his spine; Dean arches into the touch and is pushed back down, firmly. “No, boy. You wait until you’re given a command. Until then, you don’t move.”

Chastised, Dean relaxes back onto the bed and closes his eyes, allowing Benny to slowly explore his body. His gloved hand touches him everywhere: from the nape of his neck down his back to the curve of his ass, caresses his thighs and runs feather-light down his calves to his feet. Then Benny takes hold of his hips with both hands and tugs gently. It’s an instruction, and Dean complies immediately, pushing himself up onto his hands and knees and keeping his head hanging down between his shoulders. Benny whispers to him to close his eyes, then a soft strip of fabric comes to cover them and is tied snugly behind his head, blindfolding him. He’s asked for his colour and he gives it, green, so easily. He’s relaxed and so, so ready for more. Then his left hand is taken and moved out to the side, and he gets it. He’s supposed to mimic the movement with his right hand and he does, until his shoulders are pressing into the mattress and his face is buried in the pillow, arms stretched out to the side and ass up in the air, the perfect submissive pose for his dom. He hears Benny exhale in satisfaction, and his hands return to Dean’s skin, stroking and caressing and slowly working him into a pleasant haze of arousal.

“Do you need me to bind you, Dean?” The hand on his lower back is reassuring, stroking his skin lightly, and Benny leans down to whisper quietly to him. “Whatever you decide is the right answer.”

After a brief hesitation, Dean nods slowly into the sheets. “Yes, sir, please.”

“Why?” It's an affirmation and a question all in one, and it takes Dean a moment to answer.

“Because I want to be good for you… and stay still. And I don't know if I can without your help…” It's an honest answer, almost too honest. Both Dean and Benny are fully aware that if Dean wasn't blindfolded that his answer would likely have been very different; he struggles with honest over his wants and needs unless he's under Benny’s command, and even then his dom still checks in periodically. It's always been done this way, for as long as Dean can remember. It isn't that Benny doesn't trust Dean; he doesn't trust that Dean trusts himself.

“Alright. Your wish is my command.” The fingers on his back flatten to a whole, warm hand for just a moment. “I'll be right back. Sixty seconds, maximum.”

And he is. This time, he's back with a length of rope and Dean sighs as he feels it drag over his naked skin. Benny takes both his arms gently and pulls them behind his back, forcing his chest and face further into the mattress.

“Turn your head to the side, sugar. I don't want you suffocatin’ on me. That's right.”

Slowly, with gentle yet firm movements, Benny binds Dean’s arms together at his back, elbow to wrist, in a complex shibari knot. Dean loves it when Benny ties him like this and can already feel himself sinking into subspace as he kneels and waits; ten minutes later, when his bindings are complete, he relaxes into them and can't hold in a sigh of relief at the way they cradle his arms. It's almost like being held, in a way, the ropes tight on his skin but not cutting in. He's aware of Benny’s eyes on him, watching him as he adjusts to the bondage, and a moment later gentle hands press on the inside of his thighs, pushing them wider. He obliges, sinking lower into the position, his ass up and his shoulders and chest now firmly on the bed.

“Beautiful, cher. So good for me. So well-behaved.” Benny strokes the tender skin right where Dean’s thigh meets the curve of his ass, then moves up agonisingly slowly. A dry thumb comes to circle his hole gently, the palm spreading his cheek wider and exposing him. “You're goin’ to take all I can give you tonight, ain't that right?” Dean nods, and gets a slap to the ass for his efforts. “Verbal answers, boy, or this ends now.”

“Yes, sir. I am. I want whatever you want,” He throws Benny’s words from earlier back at him and is rewarded with the low rumble of laughter.

“Cheeky. I think I'll add another three to your total for that. You like the sounda that? Think you can take forty?”

It's almost impossible to muffle his groan. “Yes, sir. I know I can.”

“Good.”

And Benny makes sure he does. When it comes to spanking, Dean never knows what to expect. It could be rough and quick, a real punishment that has Dean howling and sobbing and promising the earth, or it could be slow and almost gentle, working him up into an aroused, desperate frenzy where he begs to come or be fucked or both. Tonight could be either of those things or a heady mixture of the two: and he's nervously excited to find out. Benny settles himself on his knees behind Dean, his hip pressing into the back of Dean’s already-trembling thigh, and a warm hand strokes his lower back. He’s never felt so exposed, bound and spread out for his man, ass in the air waiting for his punishment and he knows Benny’s eyes are on his most intimate area. Then, with no warning, Benny’s hand comes down hard onto the tender skin of his ass and he yelps in shock.

“Count ‘em off for me, boy.” Benny instructs then slaps him again, this time not as hard but the blow hits the tender skin of his upper thigh and Dean cries out and manages to grit out ‘two, thank you sir’ then another comes in quick succession. By the time Dean reaches ten he’s shaking from anticipation, tension, discomfort and heady arousal. His cock hangs between his thighs, full and hard, and he’s panting shallowly. Benny pauses for a moment to allow him to catch his breath before continuing. Each blow is delicious agony, a heady mix of light slaps and deeper, heavier blows and they come at random times and speeds so Dean can’t adequately prepare himself for the impact. He’s moaning constantly by the time they reach twenty-five, barely able to count thanks to the arousal pulsing through his veins, and his ass feels like its on fire. Benny spreads his cheeks with one hand and the next blow, light but still intense thanks to the leather fabric of the glove, falls right over his hole and he shouts out in blissful agony. Another falls in the same place, then another, and soon Dean is aware on some level that his entrance is reddened and puffy and sore, but he’s desperate for Benny to keep going. This is what he wanted, this is the punishment he needed.

“Ah! God!” That one hurt and he groans, biting down into the sheets to stop himself shouting out a colour he doesn’t mean. He only has five left to go, and they come in quick succession as Benny spanks him hard and fast, making Dean’s whole body rock on the bed with each slap. Then it’s all over and he’s panting and trying to catch his breath while Benny strokes his aching, reddened skin soothingly while he murmurs praise to him. A moment later his hand disappears then returns, wet with lube which he rubs gently over Dean’s aching, exposed hole and they both let out a sigh of pleasure.

Benny’s gloved hand trails slowly down Dean’s crack, over his hole and lower, smearing lube everywhere, until its caressing his balls and stimulating him beautifully. The warm, rough leather, slick with gel feels incredible against his skin, and he can't stop his low moans of pleasure. Is this allowed? I'm being punished… surely Benny would tell me if I had to be quiet… Then his hand dips further, to wrap gently around his cock which hangs heavy and full between his thighs, and pulls it back towards him.

“You look beautiful like this, cher.” Benny’s voice is low and intoxicating as he starts to stroke Dean, playing gently with him and bringing a sheen of sweat to his skin as Dean pants helplessly. “All spread out and ready for me. Why don't you tell me what you think I should do next?”

It's a trick question, it has to be, but if it is then Dean doesn't realise it in time. “Finger me, sir. Open me up.”

“Oh, you think you're ready for that? Already?” There’s amusement in Benny’s voice. “That sounds like something you’d enjoy, not something you’ll learn from. This is supposed to be a punishment, boy, not pleasure.”

“I… I’m sorry, sir.” Dean hides his face in the mattress. “Whatever you do to me is what I deserve.”

“Hmm. Better.” The sound of lube being uncapped reaches Dean’s ears and he barely has time to consider what’s coming when two wet fingers start to circle his hole agonisingly slowly, and he moans softly into the sheets. The tip of one finger enters him and his cock pulses as he gasps - it hurts, burns thanks to the spanking, but the stretch is bliss. Then a second finger pushes in too and sinks in deep and he relaxes into the mattress, trying to hold in his sounds of pleasure. Benny fingers him slowly then the sensation of a warm, wet tongue joins in and his spine arches as he’s rimmed deliciously by his dom.

“Sir… that feels incredible… thank you, thank you, sir… please, more…”

Benny licks and laps and sucks at his rim as he fingers him nice and deep, adding a third finger and finding his prostate easily, circling it and pressing down firmly. Dean’s whole body jerks and the tip of his cock pulses out a pearl of wet precome. He groans and pushes back onto Benny’s mouth, and is rewarded by a sharp slap to his sore ass, but Benny doesn’t stop. He eats him out for what feels like forever, fingering him open and stretching him until he can feel his rim loose and wet and ready. Then Benny really gets to work: two fingers circle and massage his prostate and Dean moans, gasping and trying to hold back the pleasure rising within him. He doesn’t want to come yet; he wants to come on his dom’s cock, impaled and fucked open and screaming in pleasured agony. He wants Benny’s hands on him, wants to feel himself stretched open on Benny’s thick, slick shaft, and oh God this line of thought is going to push him over the edge too soon… Benny’s fingers twist inside him and circle his prostate again; Dean’s cock is now dripping a steady stream of precome and throbbing pleasantly between his open thighs. Benny mouths at him for a moment more then pulls back, and he swears he can feel him grin. His skin is chafed from the other man’s beard and he loves the burn. He tests the bonds on his arms by pulling gently; they hold fast. He’s going nowhere.

“You ready for me, sugar?” Benny is at Dean's side now, the tips of two fingers resting just inside his hole and the back of his other hand brushing Dean’s cheek gently. The leather feels fantastic on his cheek and Dean sighs. A full-body tremor pulses through him and he wants. It's taking every ounce of self-control he possesses not to wriggle back onto Benny’s hand. He's over-sensitive and over-stimulated after being so deeply fingered and having his prostate massaged for so long, and he's desperate for more, whining needily.

“Yes! Please, please fuck me, sir. Please.” The hand at his face slaps him gently.

“What did I tell you about cursin’? If you can't hold your tongue…”

“No! I can, sir, I promise. I'm sorry. I'll behave. Just take me, please.”

Benny makes a noise of confirmation and moves behind him again, the fingers pressing back inside his hole then pulling out - four fingers push back in, stretching and spreading him once more but before Dean can get too into it Benny’s hand is gone. There's the sound of lube being uncapped, and Dean really has to fight not to demand his dom to hurry up. Between his legs, his cock is hanging neglected, and he can feel how much he's dripping with need. A gloved hand returns to the swell of his asscheek, spreading him again, and he inhales in anticipation, waiting for the hot press of Benny’s cock against his wet, stretched hole.

“What's your colour, Dean?” Benny’s voice is dark with arousal and Dean can barely get the words out fast enough as a wave of need crashes through him.

“Green! Green, sir, please. I'm so ready for you… oh…”

Something blunt and slick presses against his rim, but it isn't his dom’s cock. It's tapered and cooler and firm - a toy, and Dean is certain he knows exactly which one. Fuck. He should have known Benny wasn't finished with him yet…

“Colour, Dean?” The head of the toy pushes into him, stretching him wide, and Dean groans in pleasure as his cock pulses between his legs. Benny has chosen his favourite toy, he's sure of it, and he can only hazard a guess at what will be in store for him. When he doesn't respond quickly enough to the question, Benny slaps his ass hard with his gloved hand: the impact on his already-tender skin makes him cry out and jerk, and the toy sinks in another inch. “Colour, now Dean, or I'm ending this scene.”

“Green… oh fu- oh, God!” He corrects himself mindlessly, barely holding on to the memory of being told not to curse. Benny murmurs praise, and pleasure and pride swell simultaneously within him.

Another inch of the toy slides in, wider now, stretching his slick rim even more and he groans at the intrusion. He wonders what he looks like, spread out on this toy, helpless under Benny’s control, bound and blindfolded. His cock pulses again, leaking more precome onto the sheets as the toy sinks even deeper inside him. He spreads his legs more, helplessly, and Benny smacks him again for doing it, but he can't help it. “Sir! Please, oh please!” He doesn't know what he's begging for, but as Benny pulls the you out a couple of inches he finds himself pleading again and - yes, fuck, he's rewarded by it being pushed deeply back into him and another inch presses inside. His knees slip on the sheets and he's spread so wide the tip of his cock, wet and pulsing and desperate, brushes against the fabric; he moans lewdly at the contact and Benny pulls the toy out again, this time almost all the way so the head of it tugs at his rim, before pushing it slowly back in. “Sir! Oh, God!” It's wide, thick, splitting him open and he groans at the intrusion; Benny takes his response as a cue and pulls it out again then, settling himself on the bed behind Dean and steadying his hips with a firm hand, begins to thrust it in and out of his sub’s tight body. Dean keens, gasping, and if he wasn’t bound so perfectly he would be holding onto the sheets for dear life as Benny starts to fuck him harder, plunging the dildo as deep as it will go then drawing it out so far that the very tip leaves Dean’s body and penetrates him perfectly as it goes back in.

“Yes…yes…oh, God, oh sir, oh please, fuck me harder…” He’s close now, the tip of the toy hitting his prostate with every thrust, and Benny seems to get it because he slowly his thrusts but instead starts to grind the toy into Dean’s body. The pressure on his sweet spot changes and becomes constant as the toy is worked deeply inside him, and the pleasure starts to build and build, his muscles tightening and his hands clenching into fists. He’s going to come, there’s no way he can fight it with Benny fucking him so perfectly, and he can’t stop his groans and gasps as his orgasm approaches with fierce momentum. He feels his ass clench around the toy, drawing it deeper into his body, his balls start to draw up and his cock pulses… then Benny’s hand comes between his thighs to circle the base of his dick firmly, and he howls.

“You close, sugar?” Benny’s voice is thick with mirth, barely cutting into Dean’s haze; he knows Dean is right on the edge, and also knows that with his hand now creating a perfect, tight cockring around him that orgasm will be impossible until he lets go. The toy hasn’t stopped grinding within him, and Dean arches and whimpers and starts to beg helplessly, unaware of what he’s actually saying but desperate to come. He feels like he might burn up entirely if Benny doesn’t let him reach climax. His balls are tight up to his body and he can’t stop himself shaking as his dom strokes them gently with a leather-clad thumb. “So beautiful like this, cher. Right on the edge, waiting for my command. You like this toy, don’t you? You love it moving inside you, teasing you, pushing you right to that point where all you wanna do is come.” Benny leans down closer, and Dean groans as his thumb presses just a little harder on his balls; the toy is still inside him now, but not for long. Benny pulls it out halfway then drives it back in, his grip on the base of Dean’s cock tightening, and he cries out helplessly into the sheets, his cock throbbing and pulsing between his thighs with the desperation to spill his load all over his dom’s hand. “

If it weren’t for my hand, pretty, you’d be coming right now wouldn’t you? You’d be riding that beautiful wave, soaking my hand with your spend. Is that what you want?”

The toy pumps in and out again as Dean’s whole body shakes. His knees slip again on the sweat-soaked sheets and the head of his cock pushes into the fabric, sending sparks of pleasure through him and he starts to sob quietly. Every muscle is wound tight, his arms and shoulders are spasming with the need to reach between his own legs, and his thighs are trembling under the strain of keeping himself up on his knees to please his dom. Benny won’t be happy if he collapses onto his stomach; somehow, from his place deep in subspace, he knows he needs to hold on a little more. That Benny will give him what he needs. He’s slipping, sensations slowly blending together to form one cresting wave of agonised pleasure, and the toy pumps in and out of his clenching ass again. He sobs quietly, his vision whiting out behind the blindfold, and Benny’s thumb moves to caress the tender space behind his balls as the toy slips from him and he’s left wet, gaping, and empty, his hole clenching and desperate for more.

Dean can do nothing at all but pant into the sheets, the blindfold wet with tears, and wait until his body stops shaking quite as badly and the wave of pleasure recedes to low burn once more. He can hear Benny speaking but can’t discern words, and only hopes he’s doing as he’s asked - whatever that may be. His hopes are confirmed when Benny releases his cock and he moans in relief and distress - he’s throbbing and leaking and desperate for an orgasm, and he’s getting close to his limit. A hand rests on his cheek and Benny’s voice sounds from somewhere close by.

“Colour, Dean? Answer me, now, boy.” His voice is soft, commanding but gentle, and Dean chokes out green with a low sob. It’s almost yellow. Almost. Then Benny moves behind him and grips his hips with both hands, now bare and free of his gloves, and Dean’s breath catches on a relieved moan as the tip of his dom’s uncovered cock touches to his overstimulated rim and presses in slowly.

Benny fucks him fast and hard, avoiding his prostate, and grips the binding holding Dean’s arms for leverage, yanking on them with every pump of his hips and jerking his sub’s body back onto his cock, bringing beautiful cries from Dean’s lips with every thrust. Through his haze of ecstasy and need, Dean hears the two words that catapult him over the edge into orgasm with not even a touch to his dripping cock: Come, boy.

And he does. He spills onto the sheets below him, pumping load after load all over the bed with wrung-out cries as Benny focusses his thrusts on his prostate and fucks him hard through his orgasm, drawing it out so it goes on and on. He’s sure Benny comes too, certain that the tightening of his over-worked body brings his dom to the edge and over, but his vision goes white as he collapses onto the bed, then dark as blissful unconsciousness takes him and drags him under.

The next morning comes way too soon. Dean could stay wrapped up in Benny’s arms for an eternity and it still wouldn't be long enough. But gentle kisses to the back of his neck combined with caresses up and down his sides finally draw him awake, and he whines in displeasure at being conscious. It's early, neither of them have to be at work for a couple of hours, and he just want to cuddle. That's exactly what they do for a while until Dean’s stomach growls demandingly and Benny laughs.

“I'll make you breakfast. Anythin’ you like, cher. What sounds good?”

It goes against every fibre in Dean to allow someone to take care of him like this, but he and Benny have had more than one frank discussion about aftercare following a scene, so Dean no longer argues. Last night when he came to, he found that Benny had untied him and cleaned him up with a warm cloth, that he was wearing soft sweatpants and a cosy t-shirt belonging to his dom, and that he was cradled in Benny’s arms feeling safe and secure despite his aching body. Benny had kissed him over and over, had rubbed his arms and massaged lotion into the chafes from the rope, and had told him how perfect he had been, how gorgeous, how obedient and much Benny loves being with him. The bed had been stripped somehow and new sheets thrown on, and Benny had sat him up and fed him chocolate and helped him sip water until sleep tugged demandingly at the edge of his consciousness. He had fallen asleep on the other man’s chest and sunk into pleasant, romance-filled dreams. He stretches in bed and watches the Deputy get up and throw on some sweats.

“Bacon. Coffee. Juice. Eggs over easy.” He grins up at Benny who just smiles back at him.

“Oh, you wanna be spoiled, that it?” He takes a seat on the edge of the bed, leans down and kisses Dean deeply. “I'm sure I can manage that. You're havin’ sugar in your coffee - no, don't argue with me - and water, too.”

Dean frowns, but nods his acquiescence. He hates sugary morning coffee but Benny is right; he expended a lot of energy during their scene last night - one of their most intense yet - and he needs to replace it.

“OK. That sounds good.”

“Stay here, sugar.” Benny runs a hand lovingly through Dean’s hair. “Stay in bed and relax, I'll go make us something to eat. Only get up if you need the bathroom, alright?”

Sleepy, Dean nods. His world still feels fuzzy around the edges from sleep and he's aching pleasantly in multiple places. Wrists, thighs, throat and ass, to name a few. He watches Benny go, hears him descend the stairs with his familiar, heavy footsteps, and he snuggles down into the blankets to doze for a few minutes. But he does need the bathroom, so he throws the sheets off himself and gets up to go. Immediately, the tender skin of his ass and thighs smarts, exposed to the air, and he hisses in discomfort. He's barely three steps across the room when a chill hits him; the feel of the cool wood under his feet, the air in the room now that he isn't swathed in blankets and comfort, and the exposure of being nude and alone in someone else’s bedroom after what they've done hits him like a sledgehammer. Followed quickly by the memory of why they did what they did: because he fucked up. Week three of his new job, and error number three on his record already. Benny must be so disappointed in him, and this was his way of showing it.

All the sweet, gentle, caring words the other man has showered on him melt away, and Dean can only hear himself being reprimanded, being talked down to, and being humiliated while he lay naked and bound and unable to speak to defend himself. But that isn't what happened, the rational part of his mind tries to speak up. That isn't how it was! But Dean isn't feeling particularly rational right now: familiar feelings of disappointment, self-loathing, disgust and humiliation are washing over him and he stumbles to the bathroom on shaky legs. He tries to lock the door but his hands are trembling too much, so instead he gives in and curls up against the bathtub, arms around his knees and head resting on them, attempting to calm himself. His thighs ache as he moves, reminding him of the things they did together, and the welts on his ass sting more than a little.

You let him down, Dean. And look what he had to do to get the message home. You fucked up, again. Why can't you just do as you're asked? Why can't you manage basic tasks without him having to intervene? You don't deserve the job you have, and you don't deserve him.

A noise outside the door draws his attention but only for a second. He's cold, starting to shiver, and he hugs his knees even tighter.

Get it together. If Benny sees you this way he'll be disgusted. Pull yourself together, Dean!

“I'll be out in a minute…” His voice sounds relatively normal to his own ears, albeit muffled into his forearms. Dimly he hears someone knocking at the door and tightens his grip on his knees. He doesn't get a chance to say anything more: the door opens and suddenly Benny is on his knees at his side and a hand is in his hair. The other comes to stroke his shoulder then, as Benny seems to realise that Dean is shaking almost violently, he sighs sadly and wraps an arm around him, pulling him close to his chest.

“Darlin’, what is it? Dean, talk to me, please, cher. What's going on in that head of yours?”

“I'm sorry, sir.” Dean can't lift his head, can't let Benny see how close he is to tears. “I fucked up, and I'm sorry. I promise, I promise I won't do it again.”

“Dean,” Benny sounds pained, and holds him a little tighter, starting to rub circles into the skin of his back, tracing his spine and drawing slow patterns with his fingers. “Don't call me that any more, the scene is over, you know that. Look at me.” Dean shakes his head, face still buried in his arms. “Sugar, please look at me. Please trust me.”

He raises his head slowly, and Benny moves in front of him to cup his jaw and look deeply into his eyes, his own expression unhappy and worried. He sighs, resting his forehead against Dean’s, then pulls away to reach over and turn the shower on. Steam slowly starts to swirl up and thicken the air as Benny rubs Dean’s shoulders to try and bring the feeling back into them.

“I thought you were alright,” he murmurs, running his hands through his hair and stroking his cheeks. “I'm sorry, Dean, really, I am. Lets get you in the shower-”

“No, Benny,” Dean grabs for his lover, eyes wide and scared as fear crashes through him. “It's me, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I fucked up, I didn't mean it. It won't happen again, I swear…”

“Baby. I know.” Benny gently loops Dean’s arms around his own neck and stands, holding him upright with a strong arm around his waist and manoeuvres him into the shower. After stripping off his sweat pants, he joins him a second later. His hands are warm and soothing, and stroke over Dean’s sore ass and thighs and he leans into the touch, closing his eyes and fighting a swell of emotion. Benny is his dom, his lover, the man he defers to both at work and in private. He shouldn't have to care for Dean like this, he needs to be stronger. Needs to not fall apart at the drop of a hat. Needs to get it right.

Benny takes both his hands and places them on the wall in front of him, his chest pressing up against Dean’s back. For the first time in their relationship, he feels a stab of fear: he isn't ready for another round. He's too sore, feels too raw and too low, but he doesn't know how to say no. He hopes Benny asks for his colour, because he's sure he could be honest and say yellow, but instead lips press against the back of his neck and he shivers in trepidation.

“Benny… I don't think… I'm…” It hurts. “I don't think I can…”

“Darlin’. I would never.” Benny’s hands come to his hips; the water cascades down on them both, streaming over their skin and it's cleansing. Refreshing. Dean's eyes fall closed. “Stay right there. I'll take care ‘o you.”

And he does. He massages Dean’s shoulders, following the movements of his hands with gentle kisses all the way down his spine, then kneels behind him and repeats the caresses on his calves, thighs and ass, firm fingers working the tension out of sore muscles. There's nothing sexual about it at all, just a deep desire to make Dean feel better, to work the tension from his body and to relax him. Benny stands up and gathers up shower gel and shampoo, and insists Dean stays still while he washes the remnants of sweat and come from his body, then massages shampoo into his scalp until Dean’s head falls back to land on his shoulder. And that's when Dean can no longer hold back the tears: it feels so good, to be held and caressed and cherished like this, and he doesn't deserve any of it. A swell of emotion comes crashing down on him and he chokes on a sob, tears starting to flow freely and Benny holds him as he cries. He's turned around in the Deputy’s arms and held close, the warmth of the steam and water cocooning them and making him feel safe, secure within Benny’s embrace. He doesn't know how long he cries for, face buried in his hands against Benny’s chest, but when he finally comes back to himself they're curled up in bed together and gentle hands are stroking through his hair. They lie together quietly for a while until his sobs subside to gentle sniffles and the feeling has returned properly to his limbs.

Benny sits him up and helps him drink juice, then coffee, then hand-feeds him pieces of bacon and toast, which Dean takes silently, gratefully. He's too worn-out and exhausted to contemplate even basic tasks himself, and having Benny’s solid arm wrapped around him while he's fed is grounding and comforting. When he's done, they lie back down again Anna Benny resumes stroking his hair.

“Let’s talk about it, cher.” It's not a question. “I haven't seen you drop like that in a long time. Talk to me.”

“I just…” Dean's voice is raw from crying and he coughs once or twice to clear his throat. “I don't want to disappoint you. Ever. And I guess I felt like I had.”

“Why?”

“Because…” Because you had to punish me. Because I screwed up. “I felt like I had.”

“You could never disappoint me, Dean.” Benny’s voice is low and serious. “Ever. The only thing you could do to disappoint me is to not be honest with me. You know that.”

“I do.” He toys with his fingers, feeling his cheeks redden. He's so tired, all he wants to do is sleep. He feels hungover, or like he's run a marathon. “And I know I didn't, not really. I just…”

“Just what?”

“I just want to be enough,” he says it so quietly he knows Benny has to strain to hear him.

“Enough for what?” The surprise is thick in the other man’s voice.

“For you. At work, at home… For my colleagues.” For myself. “I don't want to be a failure.” And shit, that was hard to admit. He feels his hands tremble and he presses his lips tightly closed, waiting for the response. Waiting, hoping, to be told he isn't a failure. That he won't be if he works hard enough. That Benny can help him to not be.

“Cher. Look at me.” He does, tilting his head to look up into dark eyes that are now soft with compassion. Benny kisses him, his stubble rough against Dean’s skin. “You've always been enough for me. And you always will be, no matter what you do. It's a privilege bein’ with you, Dean. Every day’s a charm, and I mean that. I…”

He goes quiet, and Dean feels panic bubble up in his throat. Is Benny going to say… no, surely not… The older man kisses him again, cupping his jaw and exploring his mouth gently for a minute or two. Then, against Dean’s lips, he whispers words that go straight to Dean’s heart and curl up there, making a home for themselves.

“I love you, Dean Winchester. You are enough. You'll always be enough.”

Half an hour later, when Dean is able to speak again, he says it back. And a moment after that, he says, “I don't feel like I'm enough for you right now, Benny.” The other man starts to protest but he hushes him, not finished yet. He can't look at Benny when he speaks again, because he feels like he'll cry, but when he's done a soft kiss is pressed to his forehead and he's held close for hours and hours as Benny cares for him and cherishes him and tells him he's loved over and over again.

“I don't feel like I'm enough for you right now. But I feel like someday soon, I'll know I am.”

#dean winchester x benny lafitte #dean and benny

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