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lantur · 4 years

Text

if you were mine - part three

summary: Riza has been working on the unit for close to a year when she starts to wonder whether Colonel Mustang’s interest in her is more than professional.

rated: t | words: 5852

part three of four

read on ao3

Thursday feels like it drags on at work. Riza’s eyes feel unusually heavy, her shoulders ache, and there’s a familiar, dull pain in her temples and behind her eyes.

One look at her desk calendar tells her why that is, and she breathes a small sigh. She’ll be in for an unpleasant weekend.

Riza stops by the corner store after work to buy her usual supplies. Chamomile tea, chocolate, cocoa powder and milk for making hot chocolate, stew meat, and lentils. For some reason, she always craves stew at this time of the month. At the last minute, she remembers that she needs some shampoo and conditioner as well, and tosses a bottle of each into her basket. She goes through it so much faster now that her hair is so long. She still hasn’t gotten used to that.

Roy comes over a few hours after she gets home, bearing a paper grocery bag with almost identical contents to hers. There’s no shampoo and conditioner, but there is a copy of The Best Shot at Success, the recently released autobiography of Ella Schultz, the first female officer in the Amestris military. Riza hugs him tight, and they spend a relaxing night curled up on her sofa, talking quietly.

She falls asleep in his arms, but wakes up alone in her bed, neatly tucked in. Hayate lies near her feet, loyally keeping watch over her.

That morning dawns without event - a surprise. The work day is busy, with more than enough to occupy her mind. Still, as the day wears on, she grows more uneasy.

“Is everything okay, Lieutenant?” Colonel Mustang asks her, at one point. “You seem a little preoccupied today.”

“I’m just concerned about the Abitz murder, sir,” Riza replies. That is part of the truth, after all. “About the possibility you raised that it might be connected to the Bangert incident in January.”

Everyone else is in the office with them, and Breda jumps in with a theory, which thankfully distracts the Colonel.

That evening, Riza walks Hayate in the park, lost in thought. She tries to relax for the rest of the night with the book Roy had bought her, but the attempt isn’t very successful. Half an hour from midnight, she’s pacing her apartment.

“Why hasn’t it started yet?” she asks Hayate. Her faithful friend tilts his head, whining softly in the back of his throat. It’s always started on Thursday afternoon or Thursday evening. Always.

She wants to call Roy or Rebecca, the two people on this earth she can go to with anything, but she can’t. Not yet. Saying all of this to another person will make her fears real, and she isn’t ready for that yet.

“Maybe it’s just stress,” Riza says, but she doesn’t believe it, even as she says it. Even during the year she had spent in Ishval, when she had been a hollow, traumatized shell of a human being, her cycle had been as regular as clockwork.

Riza sits on the sofa, trying to think through the situation with the calm logic that is second nature to her. She is twenty-seven; far too young for her cycle to stop or change. Rebecca once mentioned that her mother had gone through menopause early, in her late thirties, but that’s a decade away yet.

She’s heard that women can miss their periods if they’ve lost weight, or are very active. She’s no more or less active than she has always been, and her clothes fit the same as they always have - not any looser. But they’re not any tighter, either, which should rule out the fear she can’t even verbalize in the privacy of her own mind.

Still, it takes her hours to fall asleep.

Riza spends Saturday with Rebecca, and manages to act normally enough that Rebecca doesn’t seem suspicious of anything amiss.

She wakes up late on Sunday morning, a leaden feeling in her stomach. Even without having to go to the bathroom, she knows that her period hasn’t started yet.

“Fuck,” Riza says softly, staring at the ceiling.

She can’t bring herself to eat breakfast. Her stomach rebels at the thought - god, her stomach actually rebels at the thought. Riza sobs once, standing in front of the stove, and immediately presses her hand to her mouth, as if she could stuff the sound back inside her. Now isn’t the time for panic or for her emotions to take over. Now is the time for calm detachment and action.

She tilts her head back and breathes deeply, in and out, until her composure returns and she’s able to take Hayate for a walk.

After coming home to drop Hayate off, Riza sits on the sofa for several minutes, resting her palms against her knees, trying to ground herself. Then, she rises and walks to the pay phone on the far east side of Trettach Park. This particular pay phone and the area around it are almost always deserted.

She enters the booth, drops the coins in, picks up the phone, and dials a number with a Central area code.

The line is picked up after the fifth ring. “Hello?”

The gruff voice is immediately recognizable. “Hello, Madame Christmas,” Riza says. “It’s Elizabeth. How are you?”

“Ah, Elizabeth.” She can hear the smile in Chris Mustang’s voice. “How many times do I have to tell you that you should call me Chris?”

“At least one more, Madame.”

“Stubborn girl. Well, that’s why you suit Rhys so well. Birds of a feather.” Chris sighs. “How’s he doing? Staying out of trouble, I hope?”

The mention of Roy makes Riza swallow over her suddenly dry throat. “Yes, for now.”

“And you?”

Riza winds the cord of the phone around her finger. “Actually, that’s why I called,” she says. “I haven’t been feeling well lately.”

There’s a brief pause on the other end, and Riza knows that Chris has understood her meaning.

“I see,” Chris says carefully. “What’s wrong?”

“Headaches, back pain, fatigue. And I’m late, which never happens.” Riza looks down at the floor. “I had a little nausea this morning. Though that could have been from nerves.”

There’s another, longer pause. “Those are all early signs,” Chris says. Her voice is softer, sympathetic.

Her stomach plummets, and Riza rests her hand against the wall to steady herself. “But how?” she asks. “How could this have happened? I’ve been as reliable with my tea as I always have. I’ve never missed a day.”

Chris sighs. “There can be inconsistencies, from batch to batch,” she says. “Issues with quality control. Some of the people who source it will mix in powdered aster to add bulk. It’s indistinguishable from Queen Anne’s Lace in color, odor, and taste. And even pure Queen Anne’s grows stale, over time, and loses effectiveness. Some apothecaries aren’t reliable at taking older batches off the shelves when they should.”

Riza closes her eyes, fighting the wave of dizziness that washes over her, and the panic. “Chris,” she says hoarsely. She wants to sink to the ground. “What am I going to do? I can’t - we can’t--”

“Breathe, Elizabeth,” Chris instructs. “Take four deep breaths. Stay with me.”

Riza breathes in, out, in, out, shakily. Her hands are trembling so hard she can barely hold onto the phone. “Okay,” she says. She trusts Chris. Chris has guided probably a hundred other women through what she is going through now. “I’m here.”

“The one good thing about this is that you caught it early,” Chris says. “And that is a very good thing. There’s no need for any back alley operations that will put you in danger.”

Riza presses a hand to her mouth. “Really?”

“Yes. It’s a matter of two herbal tinctures, one of crocus sativus and one of mesua ferrea.”

“Hold on,” Riza says faintly, bending down and searching for the notebook that she always keeps in her shoulder bag. “I need to…”

“Don’t worry about writing these down,” Chris says at once. “After what happened with the Queen Anne’s, I’m not trusting any apothecary in East City to handle this. I’ll brew some myself and I’ll send one of my couriers over. She’ll bring my written instructions on how to take them, as well as detailed notes of exactly what you can expect after you do. She’ll arrive tomorrow morning by eight.”

“Thank you,” Riza whispers, her eyes stinging. “Thank you so much.”

“Don’t thank me. You’re family, and I look out for family.” Chris heaves a long sigh. “I’m sorry,” she says. “That it has to be this way.”

Riza thinks back to their last visit to Central, to Chris’s teasing Roy about when they would get married and give her a grandchild to spoil, because she wasn’t getting any younger, you know. She nods mutely, and then remembers Chris can’t see her. “I am, too,” she says, and her voice cracks.

“Have you told Rhys?”

“Not yet,” Riza says. The thought brings back the feeling of wanting to throw up.

“Tell him,” Chris advises. “I know how strong you are, but this is too much of a burden for even you to shoulder alone.”

“I will.” Riza wipes her eyes. “Thank you.”

“Stay strong, Elizabeth. Take care. I’ll call you to check in after a few days.”

Riza walks home, feeling dazed. Hayate greets her at the door, and she sinks to her knees and wraps her arms around his neck, burying her face in his fur.

She isn’t sure how long she stays like that. She doesn’t want it to - she wants to keep it at a safe distance, removed - but it sinks in, slowly, inexorably.

She is pregnant, and tomorrow, she won’t be.

The strain of the morning exhausts her. Riza sleeps on the sofa for an hour, wakes, forces herself to choke down some buttered toast. She makes the second of the three phone calls she has to make today, and manages to avoid breaking down into tears on the phone.

Then she makes the third call. She reaches Roy on his office line, because Sundays are his designated day to finish as much work as he needs to, while having the privacy of East City Command entirely to himself. On Sundays, there’s no need to maintain any of the farce of incompetence and lazy, lackadaisical attitude that has been his mainstay for so many years.

“Hello, Colonel,” Riza says, when he picks up. To her relief, her voice is calm and even. “I’m sorry to bother you at work.”

She hears the rustle of paperwork being set down. “It’s never a bother to hear from you, Lieutenant,” Roy says. “What’s going on?”

“I have an idea about the recent murders of former State Alchemists that I’d prefer not to share over the phone. Would you mind stopping by after you’re finished?”

“I’ll be there in an hour,” Roy says at once. “Would you like me to bring any of the evidence files?”

“That won’t be necessary, sir. Thank you. I’ll see you soon.”

Cleaning her guns has always been a calming ritual. Gathering the supplies - cleaning solvent, gun oil, bore brush, patch holder and patches, cleaning rod, flashlight, cleaning brush, soft cloths for polishing. Unloading, disassembling, scrubbing and lubricating the barrel and the action, putting it all back together again, polishing the metal until it gleams lovely, subtle gray and burnished silver.

Riza cleans three of her guns and she’s just finished with putting her supplies away when she hears the key turn in the lock. Roy steps inside, and his smile at seeing her almost instantly fades into an expression of concern. “Riza,” he says, crossing over to the sofa and taking her into his arms. “What’s wrong?”

She bites back the instinctive response, to deny that anything is wrong; to claim that everything is fine. It is her job to protect Roy, and for an instant, Riza debates lying, telling him that there’s nothing amiss or just that she’s sick, and sending him away. She can bear this burden on her own, and protect him from it. Why should both of them suffer?

But something inside her warns her that she’ll regret that if she does, and Riza takes a deep breath, trying to steady herself. She glances at him for a second, and her gaze slides away. She can’t look at him. She can’t. She stares at the potted plant on the coffee table instead. “I’m pregnant,” she says.

The words fall, heavy, between them.

Roy blinks, looking stunned, like she had just struck him. Riza sees the panic begin to dawn in his eyes, then, the horror, the realization of what this means for them. It makes her stomach turn. Nobody ever wants to see panic and horror in the person they love’s eyes, and know they are the cause of it.

“I’m not keeping it, of course,” she continues. Her voice is remote, calm, unrecognizable even to herself. “I called your aunt from a pay phone this morning. She’s sending a couple of tinctures for me to take, and they should get here by tomorrow morning. It’s early enough that there’s no need for a surgical procedure.”

The expression of relief that flits across his face is gone in an instant, replaced by genuine concern, but it’s enough to gut her.

“Riza,” Roy says, reaching out to her, taking her hands. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

She doesn’t reply. She has no strength to speak.

Roy draws her into his arms, holds her close and so tightly it almost hurts, strokes her hair. Riza can feel his ragged breaths against her body, and she screws her eyes shut. She hasn’t wanted to break down so badly in years.

“It has to be done,” she says, her voice muffled by his shoulder, and she is proud that her voice remains steady. “Our careers - your ambition… We have to do this.”

Roy strokes her cheek. He is silent for a long while. It is a wild, ridiculous thought, but Riza imagines him saying Don’t, and her heart breaks.

“Thank you,” he whispers, at last. His voice cracks.

Riza bites the inside of her cheek and nods.

“If you wait to take the tinctures until tomorrow evening, I can be here with you,” Roy says, pulling back and looking into her eyes. “I don’t want you to be alone.”

“I won’t be.” Riza wraps her arms around herself. “I called Rebecca earlier. She’s taking the next train over from her parents’ place. And don’t worry - she doesn’t know anything except for the fact that my friend Elizabeth has fallen ill, but will make a full recovery after a course of some antibiotics.”

She hadn’t meant the words to sound bitter, genuinely wanting to assuage the question on his mind, but Roy slumps, rubbing the back of his neck. He takes it for a rebuke, and takes it without a word of denial. “Thank you,” he says again, quietly. “And I’m sorry.”

“It’s the right decision,” Riza repeats. “I know that.” And if she says it out loud enough, maybe that will lessen the knot in her chest, relieve the pit in her stomach and the weight pressing down on her shoulders.

Roy looks at her, concerned, and he opens his mouth to speak, but at that moment there’s nothing Riza wants more than to be alone. Far away from here. No, just far away from him. She’s never felt that way before.

“You should go,” she says, standing up.

He stays put. “I don’t want you to be by yourself,” he repeats.

There’s so much guilt written on him. She hasn’t seen him like this since Ishval. Even now, Riza worries for him, and makes herself smile a small smile. “I’m not alone,” she says, gesturing to Hayate, who rises from his spot near the window and trots to her side. “Besides, the last thing you want is for Rebecca to walk in on you here.”

“Oh. Right.” Roy finally stands, a little unsteady on his feet. “I’ll come over tomorrow after work, to check in.”

She doesn’t particularly want that; can’t imagine how she will face him, but Riza inclines her head anyway.

Roy steps close and cups her face in his hands, kisses her brow with such tenderness. Riza’s hand closes in the fabric of his shirt, holding on for a moment. There’s so much she wants to say, but she can’t.

She lets go, like she will tomorrow.

Roy leaves, looking back over his shoulder worriedly the whole time, as if he’s afraid she will combust.

Riza sinks back into her sofa and holds her arms out to Hayate. He bounds up beside her immediately, curling in her lap, and she strokes his soft, warm fur, numb.

She must have drifted off again, weary from this hellish day. When she wakes, she immediately realizes that she and Hayate aren’t alone on the sofa anymore. Rebecca is sitting beside her, a book open on her lap, two cups of tea on the coffee table in front of them. She smiles softly. “Hey, Ri.”

Riza leans into her, wrapping her arms around her friend in a rare moment of expressiveness. “Thanks for coming,” she murmurs. “I owe you.”

Rebecca strokes her hair, and then offers her the cup of tea. “You don’t. This is what friends are for.”

They pull back and look each other in the eye. “He’s not forcing you to do this, is he?” Rebecca asks at last, breaking the silence.

The bluntness of the question startles Riza, and she almost drops her tea. “What?”

“Come on, Riza,” Rebecca says softly. “He’s your commanding officer. Is he--”

She wants to deny it, she should, but she respects her friend too much to lie to her face. Rebecca deserves better than that. Riza shakes her head. “No,” she says. “I… I made the call before I even told him.”

“Are you sure this is what you want to do?”

“It’s what I have to do,” Riza repeats, for what feels like the hundredth time, out loud and in her mind, that day. “For both of us.”

Rebecca sighs. “You don’t think there’s a way to keep it, without revealing who the father is?”

“No.” Riza stares into her teacup. “People would talk, and they would assume it’s him. It would end my career, and jeopardize his as well. And I can’t do that.”

“Fuck his career," Rebecca mutters under her breath. "Adoption?” she suggests, though she sounds unconvinced.

“I admire women who can make that choice, but carrying this pregnancy and holding our…” - Riza chokes - “Our child in my arms, and giving it to someone else to love? I know I can get through this, but I don’t think I could survive that.”

Riza turns away, unable to face the sympathy on Rebecca’s face. “It’s for the best,” she repeats. “The pain will be temporary.” And she remembers her father tattooing the Flame Alchemy array onto her back, and the agony of Roy burning away parts of it.

The physical pain will be temporary. She has heard about the cramps, the bleeding, that can occur with abortifacients. But the rest of it, the grief, the emotional pain - she will carry that with her, just like Ishval.

Rebecca takes her hand. “I’ll be here for you,” she says bracingly, reading her mind. “You’ll get through this, just like you did the rest. Now, I’m going to go make us something to eat.”

Riza’s stomach rebels at the thought. “Thanks, but I’m not hungry right now.”

Rebecca holds a hand up. “Not up for discussion. Dinner, then sleep. You need to keep your strength up.”

Riza can’t argue with that.

Riza had thought that sleep would be difficult in coming, but she is so weary emotionally that she succumbs just after dinner with Rebecca. She dreams of Ishval, and wakes up with tears in her eyes. She wonders if this is penance.

The morning has a surreal, dreamlike quality to it. Rebecca receives Madame Christmas’s courier at eight, and the two of them open the paper bag and look over the tinctures inside, and the enclosed letter. Riza reads the letter twice, taking in the instructions and the warnings. The tinctures have to be drunk consecutively. There will be cramping, and the bleeding will start one to four hours after taking the second of the two tinctures. There might be blood clots that could be “up to the size of a lemon.”

Rebecca takes Riza’s arm, and she holds on to it, grateful for the stability and gravity of Rebecca on one side of her and Hayate sitting next to her.

“Come on,” Riza says, finally. Her throat aches. “Let’s do this.”

They sit on the bathroom floor together. Rebecca holds a glass of water, and Riza holds the two tinctures of amber liquid. They look so innocuous.

“It’s not too late,” Rebecca says. “If you change your mind, know that I will do anything to support you. I have family connections in the civilian sector that can help you find another job.”

Riza takes her hand and squeezes it. “I know. Thank you.”

She is scared. It hurts to admit it, and it’s stupid, because this is the natural consequence of their actions, but she is scared. And as much as she had wanted him far away last night, right now, she wishes Roy were by her side.

Both tinctures taste bitter on their way down.

Roy goes straight to the liquor store after leaving Riza’s apartment.

He pastes a bright smile on his face the moment before he steps inside, and greets the employees cheerfully. He chats with them as he grabs a bottle of vodka, then whiskey, and then rum. He is stocking up for a party tonight, a gathering of old friends from his academy days. He can’t wait. It’s been more than a year since they last got together.

The smile falls off Roy’s face as soon as he leaves the store. He wants nothing more than to break open one of the bottles on the walk to his house, but he stops himself. Public intoxication is conduct unbecoming of an officer. Just like carrying on a secret affair with one’s subordinate and forcing her to face the consequences on her own.

Roy opens the bottle of vodka as soon as he’s back in his dark, small apartment. He has three gulps down, burning his chest like fire, by the time he collapses on the sofa, head in his hands.

The next day is hell.

Drunk for most of the night, raging hangover and trying to hide it, three hours of sleep, painfully hot shower to attempt to wash the smell of liquor off of him before coming into work, hell.

“Where’s Hawkeye?” Havoc asks, as soon as they’re all (not all) in the office. Riza’s absence is conspicuous; Roy feels it like one of his senses had suddenly vanished.

Falman scratches his head. “Don’t think I’ve ever seen her miss a day before.”

Roy stares down at his paperwork and tries not to flinch.

“Out sick,” Fuery replies, looking up from his radio. “She left a message. Said she should be back by mid-week.”

“Must be a hell of a cold,” Breda says. “Let’s order a soup delivery from Harmann’s to her place over lunch.”

Roy spends the day staring at his paperwork and getting nothing significant done. His head pounds. Every other moment he finds himself thinking about how Riza is doing.

He knows more about medical abortions than the average person, from listening to his aunt and the ladies at the bar. He knows more than he wants to. The painful cramps, clots, nausea, dizziness. And he remembers hearing about the infection that had sent Vanessa to the hospital in the middle of the night and nearly killed her.

He was supposed to protect Riza. She is the most important person in his world. He was supposed to protect her, not put her in one of the worst positions of her life, to the point of putting her health in danger. He hasn’t failed so colosally since Ishval. The shame makes Roy’s throat close up and his face burn.

He let her down. Riza has shown him nothing but loyalty, devotion, compassion, empathy, and love, for all these years, and he has repaid it like this. With a secret abortion alone at home. He can’t even be by her side today, because then they’d be out of work at the same time. Then people would talk, rumors would spread, and that would sabotage their careers and his ambition.

Roy rubs his eyes and curses himself for selfish garbage. He asks himself, for the tenth time since the last evening, if his ambition is worth it.

At least Riza isn’t completely alone, he remembers belatedly. Rebecca is with her. That is a small comfort. And he can go see her as soon as he leaves work (but after night falls and the city streets begin to empty out, because nobody needs to see him visiting his adjutant’s apartment alone, because then people would talk, rumors would spread…)

The thought of seeing Riza makes Roy’s chest tighten with anxiety. He wants to see her, he needs to see her - your selfish wants and needs are what got Riza into this situation in the first place, he reminds himself brutally - and at the same time, something in him shrinks back from the thought. He remembers the way she had looked at him last night, removed and distant. Riza has never looked at him like that before.

What if she hates him now? What if she’ll never be able to look at him again without remembering the pain he has put her through?

His palms are sweating. Roy wipes them against his chair, trying to still the slight tremble to them.

He can’t remember the last time he felt so sickeningly, viscerally anxious. The rest of the hours drag by. One by one, the rest of the team leaves for the evening.

Roy locks up the office once they have all gone. Stops in the locker room, changes out of his uniform, washes his face, dry heaves over the sink a few times.

He goes to Bosque’s after leaving and picks up food for Riza. It’s blissfully dark by then. A blessing, considering how badly the lights and sunshine have made his head pound all day. He’s walking up the stairs, lost in thought, and almost runs into someone coming down.

She is short, dark-haired, and looks just as preoccupied as he had been. They recognize one another the instant they lock eyes.

“Catalina,” Roy manages, inclining his head, suppressing the immediate, instinctive reaction of fuck, this is bad.

Rebecca’s eyes narrow. “Scumbag,” she says, and shoulders past him, continuing down the stairs.

Roy stares, taken aback. Before she can get too far, he reaches out, grabbing her by the arm. “Wait,” he says, too loudly. “How is she?”

Rebecca shakes him off. “Like you ca--”

“Please,” Roy interrupts. In any other time, he would have been incensed, but now, all he feels is weariness and worry.

“She’s okay,” Rebecca says at last, refusing to make eye contact with him. “It went as well as can be expected. No sign of fever or complications.”

Roy closes his eyes, and all the breath leaves his body in a long sigh. “Thank you,” he says. “For being there when I couldn’t.”

Rebecca glares at him and then whirls around, leaving without another word.

Roy proceeds upstairs, unlocking the door with some trepidation. “Riza?” he calls, stepping inside.

Hayate yips, but doesn’t rise from his spot on the sofa, next to Riza. She sits there, wrapped in a blanket, the book he had given her on her lap, cup of tea in her hand. She looks at him, and her grasp on the teacup seems to tighten. “Hey,” she says quietly.

Her face is pale, and there are dark circles under her eyes. She looks drawn, exhausted.

Roy drops the bag of food on the floor and walks over to her, enfolding her in his arms without a word. There is so much he wants to say, so much that he had planned to say during those hours of work, and now, he can’t bring himself to speak.

“How are you feeling?” he manages, at last.

“I’m okay,” Riza says, drawing away from him, resting her hands on Hayate again. His fur warms her hands so well. She’s felt cold most of the day. “Still a bit...sore. But the worst of it has been over for hours.”

“I’m glad,” Roy says, pulling in a ragged breath, and Riza looks at him out of the corner of her eye, through her bangs. Even now, the sight makes her aching shoulders tighten a little further out of worry. He looks as awful as she’s ever seen him, and he smells faintly of alcohol. He had made the effort to shave, but there’s a fresh cut on his cheek.

It’s clear that he hasn’t taken this well. Or in stride. She never likes to see him agitated, let alone deeply disturbed like this, but it gives Riza a sense of perverse reassurance. That at least she isn’t the only one suffering. The thought makes her feel guilty a heartbeat after she has it.

“I’m so sorry,” Roy whispers. He takes her hand, holds it tightly, stares at the coffee table.

“Don’t be,” Riza makes herself say, because that is the right response. “This wasn’t your fault. It was both of us.”

Roy turns and looks at her with that intense, penetrating stare she knows so well, the one that can root anyone to the floor and cause any thought of untruths to wither and die. “Are you all right?” he asks, and that look on his face prevents her from her first, instinctive response. “I’ve always counted on you to be honest with me. Please don’t stop now. Don’t feel that you have to hold back in order to spare me anything.”

That sincerity, the plea, cuts deep. Riza meets his gaze. “I know this is what I had to do,” she says carefully, willing herself to keep her voice steady. “What we had to do. I kept - keep - telling myself that. And you. And Rebecca. I kept thinking that, but…”

She trails off, suddenly unable to say another word.

“Oh, Riza,” Roy whispers, sounding anguished, and he puts his hand on her shoulder.

Riza folds into herself, wrapping her arms around her stomach, and breaks down sobbing. Roy pulls her into him, holding her tightly as she weeps, curling against him, painful, gasping for air, gut-wrenching sobs, like she hasn’t since her mother died and then Ishval. As hard as she tries, she can’t stop. “I wanted it,” she cries. “I know it’s stupid, but I wanted it, so badly, and...and--”

“It’s not stupid,” Roy says hoarsely. She can feel the moisture in her hair and knows that he is crying too.

She hadn’t cried when the cramps had wracked her body, and hadn’t cried when the bleeding had started. She had put herself into a stoic daze, like she had so many times before. Now, it’s like a dam has broken. Riza cries for what feels like hours, until her ribs and eyes ache and she can barely breathe.

Roy holds her the entire time, stroking her hair, wiping her face with the corners of her blanket. When her tears finally subside, he tilts her face up to his with a gentle pressure of fingers on his chin, and Riza looks up into his reddened eyes.

“Next time, it will be different,” Roy says quietly. “I promise you that.”

His voice is deadly serious, the way it had been when he had vowed to become Fuhrer. The words take a moment to sink in, and they make her eyes burn all over again. Riza nods wordlessly.

Roy reaches out and tucks a lock of stray hair behind her ear. Then he looks at her, a searching, tentative gaze. He leans forward, slowly, like he’s never done before, clearly telegraphing the movement, and kisses her softly on the lips.

Riza kisses him back, like she has a thousand times before. But this time, instead of feeling like coming home, like comfort, it hurts. As viscerally as it had when he had burned the skin on her back so long ago.

She jerks away instinctively, automatically. Roy blinks at her, startled, and then turns red. “I’m sorry,” he says hastily. He reaches toward her, and then hesitates, pulling his hands back, as if remembering himself. “I shouldn’t have just--”

Riza touches his knee, feeling his leg twitch beneath her hand. “It’s not you,” she says, with feeling. “It just feels too...raw...right now.” She pauses, struggling with the words. “It might be a while until everything feels...right. I just need time.”

“Of course,” Roy says, running a hand through his hair, making it stand on end.

He looks like he is going to say something, and Riza forestalls him. “You don’t have to wait for me,” she says. “If all of this has become too much of a complication in your life, a distraction from your goal. Or if you’d rather be with a woman you can actually take out in public. Someone without all of this--” she tries not to choke on the word, and gestures between them. “Baggage.”

Roy grabs her hand, giving her another one of those intense looks. “Riza,” he says. “There is nobody else I would rather be with. I don’t care how long I have to wait for you. Whether it’s weeks, or months, or years. I’ll wait, without question.”

“Roy--”

“I’m a patient man,” he says, squeezing her hand. “And I won’t be deterred from my goals. You should know that.”

“I do,” Riza whispers, relenting at last. “I do. And thank you, for understanding.”

“Always.”

Roy stays over that night, though, just to make sure that she is all right. They eat dinner together and Roy takes Hayate out for a short walk. Afterward, he tucks her into bed and settles into the reading chair in the corner of her room, near the window. Riza falls into a deep, dreamless sleep.

She wakes up briefly at sunrise, to Roy moving around the room, getting ready to leave for work. The other side of her bed is still tucked neatly, and it looks like he had slept in the armchair.

“Try to get some paperwork done today, Colonel,” she says, turning toward him, half-getting up in bed. “I’m sure you have a lot to catch up on.”

His back is to her, and she sees him stiffen at the formality of the words. He turns to face her, and Riza smiles.

Roy visibly relaxes at the look on her face, and salutes her. “I’ll do my best, Lieutenant.”

He leaves, and Riza settles back into bed, feeling simultaneously melancholy and more at ease than she has in days.

#royai #royai fanfiction #royai fanfic #roy mustang x riza hawkeye #fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood #fma:b #roy mustang #riza hawkeye

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josephbruggles-blog · 5 years

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WHY AM I ALWAYS HUNGRY? 11 Reasons You Are Constantly Starving

WHY AM I ALWAYS HUNGRY? 11 Reasons that You Are Frequently Hungry Reasons You're Constantly Starving Your body relies upon food for energy, so it's regular to feel starving if you do not consume for a few hrs. If your tummy has a constant rumble, even after a meal, something can be going on with your wellness. The clinical term for severe appetite is polyphagia. If you really feel hungry regularly, see your doctor. Numerous things can trigger appetite. Diabetes Your body transforms the sugar in food right into gas called glucose. But when you have diabetes mellitus, glucose can not reach your cells. Your body pees it out instead and also informs you to consume more. Individuals that have kind 1 diabetes mellitus, particularly, might eat big amounts of food and also still drop weight. In enhancement to a spike in your hunger, signs of diabetic issues may include: Severe thirst The demand to pee regularly Weight reduction you can't describe Blurry vision Cuts as well as swellings that take a very long time to heal Tingling or pain in your hands or feet Fatigue Low Blood Sugar Level Hypoglycemia is what you have when the glucose in your body drops to really low levels. It's a common problem for individuals with diabetes mellitus, however various other wellness issues can trigger it, also. They include liver disease, kidney conditions, neuroendocrine growths in your pancreatic (insulinomas), and also troubles with your adrenal or pituitary glands. In severe situations, individuals with hypoglycemia may seem drunk. They may slur their words and have problem walking. Other signs can consist of: Anxiety Feeling like your heart is skipping a beat Pale skin Trembling Sweating Tingling around the mouth Absence of Rest Not obtaining adequate rest can impact the hormonal agents in your body that control appetite. Individuals who are sleep-deprived have a bigger cravings as well as find it harder to really feel full. You're likewise extra most likely to long for high-fat, high-calorie foods when you're tired. Other results of sleep deprival consist of: A tough time staying alert Modification in mood Clumsiness A lot more accidents Difficulty staying awake throughout the day Weight gain Tension When you're anxious or stressful, your body releases a hormonal agent called cortisol. This amps up your sensation of cravings. Several people under stress and anxiety additionally crave foods high in sugar, fat, or both. It may be your body's attempt to "close off" the part of your brain that triggers you to worry. Other signs include: Angry outbursts Tiredness Headache Sleep troubles Indigestion Diet plan Not all foods load you up similarly. The ones that curb appetite finest are high in protein-- like lean meats, fish, or milk items-- or high in fiber. Excellent resources of fiber are fruits, vegetables, entire grains, and also beans. Healthy and balanced fats like those located in nuts, fish, and also sunflower oil can reduce your cholesterol degrees. They're key to a well balanced diet plan and can assist you feel pleased after you consume. Pastries, white bread, many packaged meals, as well as quick foods lack these nutrients however are high in fat and harmful carbohydrates. If you consume a great deal of these, you can locate yourself hungry again not long after a meal. You may consume greater than you should. You may feel fuller after a meal if you take even more time to eat and also enjoy your food, rather than consuming it promptly. It can also aid to focus on what gets on your plate rather of the TV or your phone. Medicine Some drugs can make you intend to eat greater than typical. Antihistamines, which deal with allergic reactions, are known for this, as are antidepressants called SSRIs, steroids, some diabetes medications, as well as antipsychotic medicines. If you've gotten weight since you started a drug, the medicine might be making you really feel hungry. Talk with you doctor to figure out what various other drugs may work for you. Maternity Many moms-to-be notification a massive leap in hunger. This is your body's means of making sure the infant obtains sufficient nutrients to expand. Many women gain between 4 as well as 6 extra pounds throughout the first 3 months (your doctor will call this the initial trimester) and after that 1 pound a week during the 2nd and 3rd. Various other indications that you may be expectant are: A missed out on period The demand to pee commonly Upset tummy Sore breasts or breasts that obtain larger Thyroid Troubles The thyroid is a butterfly-shaped gland in your neck. It makes hormones that control the rate at which every body organ in your body works. If your thyroid is working too hard, you might have hyperthyroidism. Besides an enlarged thyroid gland, other indications of the problem are: Quick pulse Feeling anxious Even more sweat than normal Muscular tissue weak point Thirst even after alcohol consumption Diet plan Soft drink Lots of individuals consume sugar-free soda to reduce on calories or reduce weight. The phony sugar in these drinks tells your brain to expect calories it can utilize for fuel. When your body does not obtain any type of, it switches on your "cravings switch" and also informs you to get calories from food instead. If diet plan soft drink is making you hungry, you might additionally notice: Frustrations Sugar yearnings Weight gain Dehydration Are you hungry or just thirsty? You can't constantly inform the difference in the signals you obtain from your body. Various other signs of dehydration consist of: Dizziness Feeling worn out Peeing much less typically or having dark-colored pee Some research study shows that if you have a glass of water prior to or during a dish, you could really feel complete on fewer calories. Just How Much You Exercise Your body burns calories for gas when you exercise. This brings about an increase in your metabolic process, the procedure through which your body uses energy. In some individuals, that can trigger a boost in hunger. It is vital that you learn to consume correctly, so that your metabolic process can adjust correctly. Take a Look at this Video Clip at Youtube, and find out more aboutHealthy Consuming as well as Weight management.

https://youtu.be/wcp86bsdjkM

#constantly hungry #why am i always hungry #always hungry #hungry #why am i so hungry #Why Hungry #why am i so hungry all the time #i am hungry #how to reduce hunger #reasons why youre hungry #why am i constantly hungry #what causes hunger after eating #always hungry cheat day

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taevren-blog · 6 years

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Intermission

“You glance at the lit up screen, visibly wincing at the sight of Jungkook’s triple chin behind a contact name littered with a bunch of emojis. JGAY, it says, with an unsettling number of pink hearts next to it.”

➤ The producer in charge of mixing the track for your team in the upcoming dance competition turns out to be Hot Stranger who saved you in a dingy bathroom. No thanks to your sorry excuse for best friends and Jimin’s intolerable dependence on alcohol.

• pairing: yoongi / reader

• genre: teeth rotting fluff, eventual smut, 80% crack

• count: 3.5K

• tags: dancer!reader, producer!yoongi, established jikook, pining taejin

• note: this is my first ever attempt at writing so do let me know if this is your cup of tea

prologue >

There is a familiar sense of dread and an inkling of impending doom that settles in the pit of your stomach when you hear and physically feel the kitchen counter shake with the vibrations of your phone.

You glance at the lit up screen, visibly wincing at the sight of Jungkook’s triple chin behind a contact name littered with a bunch of emojis. JGAY, it says, with an unsettling number of pink hearts next to it.

It takes the shrill beeping of your digital kitchen timer for you to press on the glaring red button to reject the call, and you press it with a lot more pressure than required. No one is going to ruin your one day off. Not when you just purchased the most expensive – and pretentious – of ingredients to satisfy your cravings for a nice dinner and some alone time.

You move to unwrap the steak you bought, letting out a satisfied sigh as you place it on the cutting board. The R&B playlist you put on shuffles to play one of your all-time favourites, and you’re just about to break out into a horrible rendition of the first verse when the front door swings open.

“I LOVE THIS FUCKING SONG!”

Jungkook comes barrelling into the apartment, skidding to a halt to kick his shoes off to the side before resuming his Naruto run to the kitchen. A dissatisfied groan leaves your lips when you see that he has company.

“Wow.” Taehyung rounds the counter, peering at the boiling pot of vegetables. “Having an expensive dinner all by yourself and you didn’t even think about inviting us?”

You’re about to tell him to screw off when Jimin nudges you aside with his hip, opening the freezer and pulling out a tub of ice cream. Your tub of chocolate cookie dough ice cream.

“May I ask who invited the three of you?” There is a loud bang as you shut the overhead cupboard. “Last time I checked, I rejected the call.”

“Aw, don’t be so grumpy, we know you secretly want us here,” Jimin coos with a gentle pinch of your cheek before shoving a spoon into the tub of untouched ice cream.

Jungkook pokes at the piece of steak you were about to attend to.

“We’re like… Your best friends.”

“Don’t fucking touch the meat with your filthy hands!”

“I swear I washed them before I touched it-“

You whirl around and menacingly point the kitchen tool at him. “Before I swing this meat tenderiser mallet into your disgustingly proportionate face, you better get the hell out of my kitchen, Jeon.”

He raises both hands up in an act of surrender before darting behind a chuckling Jimin, who is now almost half done with your ice cream thanks to the help of Taehyung.

It’s not as if you didn’t enjoy their company. The thing is that you rarely give yourself day offs, and the last time you invited them over to one, it was an absolute nightmare.

“I know you’re thinking about the disaster that was movie night but I swear we’ll behave this time,” Jungkook promises, waving his pinky finger in the air.

You send him a pointed glare before turning to look at a gigantic hole in the wall where your clock is hung, the ever so present piece of evidence that reminds you of what went down that night.

An iron blade gets ripped out of its former place in the armour – the distinctive sound of metal slicing through the room – before stabbing into flesh at the same time clammy hands grip the leather of your jacket.

“You have my respect, Stark.”

There is a dramatic gasp and a ‘no! not iron man!’ to your right as you slam the glass of wine in your hand onto the coffee table. You then squirm in your seat, a hand raised up to push a sobbing Jimin away from your shoulder. It works for a wondrous two seconds before he lets out a loud sniffle and plops his head back down on it again.

“Fuck this.” You lean forward in your seat and shove a hand in the popcorn bucket sitting on the floor, still filled with the caramel coated treats abandoned halfway through the movie. Carelessly picking up a handful of what is left, you aim the popcorn in the direction of Jimin’s useless boyfriend and let them fly. “Can you please, for the love of God, get Jimin off my damn shoulder.”

Jungkook’s eyes are trained on the screen and he is so deeply engrossed in the movie that he doesn’t even look away when he pulls on Jimin’s arm to get the older man lying against him instead.

You stretch your neck towards the left to relieve yourself of the strain that came with holding it at an uncomfortable angle for so long before settling back into your seat. It is then, however, that the peace is shattered again by the last of three idiots.

“Don’t hate me,” a voice on your left mumbles, “but can you please hold my hand?”

An exasperated sigh leaves your lips and you turn to look at Taehyung, whose lips are pulled down in a pout, eyes glistening with unshed tears. You then lightly pat his head in an act of comfort before reaching down to take his hand in yours.

You grumble under your breath just as the final scene starts to play, “Never watching a movie with any of you idiots again.”

“That was too much, I need a drink,” Jimin sniffles, shifting from his compromising position on Jungkook’s lap to grab the cheap vodka Taehyung bought at the nearby mart, downing it in one shot.

Needless to say, that was the start of what became a gigantic hole in your wall and one of many noise complaint letters found at your doorstep the next day.

“Alright, so maybe we are a mess,” Taehyung begins, but you’re already turned away from the three of them and rubbing kosher salt into your steak that should have been seared and plated half an hour ago, “but we came here to take you out!”

“Do you not see the kitchen apron that I am wearing and the uncooked meal that I am supposed to be having before the three of you so rudely interrupted me?”

A pregnant pause.

“Well, we just want to have a night out,” Jimin tries. He seals the empty tub now devoid of ice cream with the lid and slides it to the side. “You haven’t been out in weeks, Y/N. You’re always in the studio doing the same routines over and over again. It’s time to take a break, don’t you think?”

Jungkook takes the opportunity to chip in with a meaningless comment, “Yeah, and you seriously need to get laid- Oof!”

He almost slides off his seat after Jimin elbows him in the ribs but quickly grips onto the edge of the counter to pull himself back, a petulant pout on his lips.

“Kook’s not wrong-“ Taehyung laughs only to be cut off by thunderous bangs as you hammer the meat with your tenderiser mallet.

“Come out with us, please-“

Bang! Bang! Bang!

Jungkook pulls off one of his socks and throws them in your direction, aiming for the back of your head.

He misses.

A look of sheer terror and unmitigated fear takes over his face and he’s out of his seat in an instant the moment he sees his iron man sock land onto the stove.

“Oh my fucking- Kook!” Jimin yells, when he sees the sock catch fire.

You’re still aggressively pounding the meat, meat that now looks way too deformed to even look mildly palatable.

“Y/N, there’s a problem!”

“Maybe the three of you are the- OH MY GOD!”

You pause mid-whirl, almost dropping the metal hammer in your hands when you see the still burning sock get waved around in the air by a screaming Taehyung. He tries to hit it against the side of the table and panics when the fire still doesn’t go out.

“Sink!” Jimin grabs Taehyung’s arm and shoves it towards the tap. Water rushes out and Jungkook makes himself useful by manically smacking the sock with your dishwashing sponge.

It takes a full minute for everyone to register the fact that the sock is no longer on fire, and another thirty seconds before you rip your apron off and pounce for the muscled pig, who squeaks in surprise and takes off in the opposite direction.

Jimin plops down on the couch in exhaustion.

“At least dinner can no longer be used as an excuse?”

“I guess.” Taehyung reaches up to wipe at his forehead. “We’re still getting our asses beat but it’ll be worth it. What else can go wrong?”

Apparently everything else can.

This is a bad idea, you repeat to yourself each time you down a shot, every single one a different colour of the rainbow, and every single time you slam the empty glass on the bar counter, a chorus of cheers erupt around you.

To be fair, it’s not as if you wanted to come, but Jungkook promised to pay for two weeks’ worth of lunches and you can never say no to free food. Not to mention Jimin repeatedly whined about how he wanted to get so drunk he forgets the burning sock saga. Which is what brought the four of you to Trick Shots, the new bar that opened ten minutes away from your apartment.

“I can’t believe you made alcohol your go-to coping mechanism,” Taehyung laughs, slapping Jimin on the back.

The smaller man swats his hand away, turning to Jungkook with reddened cheeks and crescent moon eyes. “This is why I only love you,” he sings, cupping the younger man’s cheeks and squishing them, before whisking him away from the counter and you assume, the dance floor.

You shut your eyes to get away from the coloured lights flashing every second, leaving you feeling not only disoriented, but also contributing to the dizzying headache that came with the endless shots of alcohol.

“Here.” A hand on your shoulder gently shakes you. “Drink some water. You look like you need it.”

With an eye half open to slowly get used to the obnoxiously glaring neon lights, you thank Taehyung with a smile and a raise of your glass before downing it like someone who hasn’t had a sip of water in days.

As you slowly begin to sober up, you glance around the bar in search of Jimin and Jungkook, slightly panicking when they are nowhere to be found. That is, until you hear a familiar screech from the other side of the room, and you whip your head around to spot a wobbly Jimin on one of the pool tables with an incredibly frustrated Jungkook helplessly grabbing at his sleeves to get him to come down.

Your eyes widen and you slide the now empty glass you were holding across the counter, muttering a quick thank you to the bartender before pushing past the crowd in order to save your best friends from any more trouble – also to prevent severe second hand embarrassment on your end.

With a speed you never knew you possessed, you reach the pool table in no time, of which a small crowd has started to form around it. Random requests are shouted at an intoxicated Jimin, who is now body rolling to a remixed song you can’t remember the title of, and you can see the visible plea for help in Jungkook’s eyes as he gets pushed against the side of the table by everyone else.

“Alright! Show’s over!” You squeeze through the gaps between sticky and relentless human beings, climbing onto the pool table and grabbing Jimin by the collar of his shirt.

He giggles and a stream of unidentified words leave his mouth but you smack him on the back of his head, voice taking on a murderous tone, “One more word from you and I will personally toss you into a pit of flames and then you will disintegrate into ashes, you hear me?”

You tug him down towards Taehyung and Jungkook, both looking stressed beyond belief. Everything goes perfectly fine until Jimin steps into one of the holes at the corner of the pool table and falls forward, sending him flying straight into the two men.

Jungkook grabs him by the waist just in time to prevent him from falling right onto the floor but he stumbles backwards due to the impact and bumps into a neighbouring table. You watch as beer gets spilled onto a group of men and if you thought it was chaotic before, this whole new situation makes you want to crawl into a hole and bury yourself alive.

“What the fuck!” One of them slams his hand on the table, the growling face of a tattooed tiger head staring right at you, and before you can even try to make amends, the man punches Jungkook across the face.

He crashes to the floor with Jimin being additional weight, and the latter starts to yell at the man. “You fucking – ngh – buffoon! How dare you!”

You rush forward and wedge yourself between them, Taehyung pulling your two other friends to their feet. Apology after apology tumbles out of your mouth and you nudge Jungkook once he gains his footing, using your head to gesture at an unplanned escape route.

“Sorry,’ you nervously glance around the table, “kind gentlemen! I’m sure you’re all very nice people, but my friend here is both drunk and extremely stupid because we all collectively share one brain cell so please accept my sincere apologies and spare us from your wrath?” The last part of your sentence comes out as a question, the whole thing rushed out in one breath.

The man snarls and you squeak out a quick ‘bye’ before scrambling away from the table, anxiously pushing all of your friends away from it. You vaguely register the angry shouts behind you over the ridiculously loud music but you steer your friends into the direction of what looks like a narrow hallway.

A neon pink toilet sign hammered into a wall catches your attention and you don’t even bother to check which one you’re going into before you’re running into the safety of the bathroom.

When you successfully slip inside, you turn to close the door after your friends only to realise that they’re nowhere to be found. You’re just about to head out to look for them until the voices of the men after the four of you increase in volume, sounding like they’re just around the corner.

Immediately slamming the bathroom door shut, you spin around before an unidentifiable noise of surprise tears from your throat and you slap a hand across your mouth to silence it.

The bathroom is empty save for the man standing in front of you, donning a loose, midnight dress shirt half tucked into a pair of jeans ripped at the knees. If this was any other situation and you were as intoxicated as before, you’d be making mental notes of how his collar bones peak out from behind the almost sheer fabric and how soft his hair looks, but you are an escapee about to be slaughtered by angry men.

A muffled shout to check the bathroom immediately snaps you back to reality and a stream of muttered apologies leave your mouth as you dart into the only empty stall. You barely get the door shut and you’re still fumbling with the lock when the door to the bathroom swings open, revealing the worst of the lot; tiger tattoo guy.

“Did you see anyone come in?” He gruffly asks, and you’re clambering onto the toilet seat with your heart pounding against your chest at an alarming rate.

There’s a slight crack in the door due to your previous failure to lock it and you have your head in your hands when Hot Stranger you caught mid-piss responds.

“I just came in so I wouldn’t know.”

You physically give yourself a good pinch when you find yourself thinking about how nice his voice sounds.

“Fucking twats ruined my night. I’ll be damned if I let them leave unscathed.”

A part of you tells yourself that the best thing to do now is to attempt to shut the door even though it might risk catching Tiger Guy’s attention, but the fearful part of you keeps you squatting on the toilet seat mouthing prayers to yourself.

“I’ll leave you to it, man. Sounds rough.” Hot Stranger clears his throat. “You can check the bathroom stalls if you want, I need to take a shit.”

You’re angrily deducting points from your imaginary scoreboard when the door to your cubicle opens slightly, and then Hot Stranger slips in. He turns to lock the door and puts a finger to his lips before shuffling closer to you.

The creaking coming from the cubicle next to yours signalling the opening of its door and Tiger Guy grunting in acknowledgement keeps the both of you silent for a short while. You think about shooting him a thumbs up but decide against it, nervously running a hand through your hair instead.

“You know, this is the men’s bathroom,” Hot Stranger whispers, lips pulling into a mind-blowingly attractive smile as he shuffles closer to you.

With a roll of your eyes, you whisper back, “I am aware. Thank you for your pointless input, Hot Stranger.”

This earns you a raise of his brow and he tilts his head to the side in interest. You watch as his tongue darts out to wet his lips before he’s leaning in close to you.

“Giving pet names to someone you just met… Interesting.” He fingers the collar of his shirt, and you purposefully look down to stare at your shoes in an attempt to not think about how perfect his hands are and how they would feel on you.

“Then what the fuck am I supposed to call you, oh kind sir,” you snap back as best as you can in a whispered voice, hoping you look a lot more menacing than you actually sound.

His eyes light up in amusement. “Got quite a mouth on you, huh.”

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” you respond, a hint of a smile threatening to pull at your lips.

There’s a few seconds of the both of you just staring at each other. You’re trying to keep up the unwavering gaze but your eyes betray you and they flicker down to his lips. He seems to notice that, and takes another step into your space, shaking his head in faux disapproval.

It’s when he tucks a stray hair behind your ear and you unconsciously lean into his touch that you hear a familiar voice calling out your name in the bathroom.

“Y/N? Are you here?” Jimin’s voice is easily recognisable.

A throat clears and Hot Stranger steps aside so you can hop down from the toilet seat.

You cautiously swing the door open. “Hey Chim, glad to see that you’re… Alive.”

“Christ, I’m glad you’re not dead. I almost- Who’s that?”

Shoes scuffle against the floor and you’re about to answer with ‘hot stranger’ when the man in question shrugs and goes, “Yoongi.”

Jimin’s eyes narrow in suspicion before they widen to the size of saucers.

“Did you seriously get some in this… This dingy toilet in a shady bar? I thought you had standards! Not that this,” he gestures at Yoongi, “guy isn’t hot but what the fuck? We almost died and you went to hop on a dick?”

The only reason why you took so long to cut Jimin off is because your mind is a constant repeat of the name you just learnt. Yoongi, Yoongi, Yoongi, playing like a broken record in your head.

“Chim, for God’s sake. He saved my ass from that demonic, tiger tattoo bearing, meathead.” You settle for that explanation, mind still reeling from the events that happened just minutes ago. “That you are to blame for, by the way. Now that you’re sober, I hope you’re ready for the ass whooping of a lifetime.”

“Kinky,” Yoongi chuckles next to you.

You feel heat rise up to your cheeks and ears at his close proximity and immediately step away so you can formulate a proper sentence.

“Thanks for helping me out back there, I really owe you one,” you tell him, hands smoothing down the sides of your shorts. A nervous habit.

He hums in acknowledgement and moves to exit the bathroom, but not before patting the top of your head and ruffling your hair. “Guess this is a debt you’ll have to repay someday.”

Jimin elbows you when you just stand there, frozen in place, so you recover as best as you can and try to emulate the face of a confident individual who did not just reach a whole new level of embarrassment in front of a ridiculously attractive man.

“We’ll see.” You give him a playful salute. “Thanks again, Yoongi.”

He’s one foot out of the door when he turns back, gummy smile back on that beautiful, beautiful face.

“The pleasure is mine, sweetheart.”

#bts #bts scenarios #bts reactions #yoongi scenarios #bts smut

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littlewalken · 6 years

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Missed signs I have iron deficient anemia

If you’re experiencing any of the things I mention and don’t feel like you’re getting better for fu#ks sake get tested for anemia. I’m not going to say that knowing I had it for all these years would have changed my life in any significant way but it might have helped me feel a bit less like shit.

I have had blood tests over the years for health and job related reasons, anemia was never brought up in the results for what ever American health care for poor people sucks reasons.

First off I’m very pale. Aside from my genetic predisposition to having a fair skin tone I’ve also stayed away from getting a tan because of bad burns in my teen years and having a questionable mole removed around the same time, and cold sores. I go out in the daylight so I get some sun.

My blood pressure is always low, my hands and feet get cold. Other family members have Raynaud's and I have ridges on my nails so I thought it was that.

I am always tired. Diet doesn’t affect it. Exercise, like taking a walk the average mobile person would find invigorating or refreshing, exhausts me. The more I walked the more my legs hurt. I thought it was because I was out of shape and side effects of a broken tail bone. As I child I was in dance classes and my legs were killing me.

My sense of balance would go from fine to stumbling. The longer I walked the worse my balance could be to the point I looked like I was drunk. I passed it off as being my brain injury.

Between hay fever, sinus infections, family history, and the brain injury I thought dizzy spells were just a part of life. I also take precautions to prevent heat stroke which I thought was another part of my life. It was normal for me to be going about my life feeling a bit light headed. I thought having confusing thoughts was the brain injury and something to work through with the neuroplasticity of TBI recovery.

Changing my diet and taking supplements didn’t change my energy levels. Like other family members my digestive system disagreed with some foods and I felt worse on certain eating plans. I love hamburgers. I like liver. I also like lemon. Beef/red meat, and lemon are among cravings people on anemia can have. When I was younger and had less fillings I ate more ice. I’ll chose a savory flavor over sweet. One of my favorite meals when younger was meat cooked in an iron skillet.

I am diagnosed bi-polar but I also have a traumatic brain injury to my right frontal lobe. My moods and anxiety I’ve attributed to the injury, a family history of mental disorders, and having an anxious childhood. That will take time to detangle what’s TBI and what’s anemia. When I was on mood medication and having regular counseling I was still having sudden unexplainable mood shifts. Recently I began to think those were connected to the brain injury and a form of epilepsy. I also had reasons to believe I was having stress induced seizures. The medication wasn’t affecting what I thought were anxiety attacks.

I get nasty headaches I was attributing to migraines and stress. OTC relief was hit and miss. I discovered a sensitivity to a class of prescriptions that make it so I can’t take them. Sometimes a single beer would do enough to relax me and let me rest but if it didn’t I wouldn’t have a second. I always drank at home to be safe. My next step was going to be marijuana because it’s legal where I live. Now I’m going to let the anemia treatment run its course to see what happens.

My monthly cycle always exhausted me. Some days it would be so heavy I wouldn’t leave the house for worries of leaking. It’s common for it to be like that and I was more worried about endometriosis which my mother had. Some times it’s light. As I’m approaching menopause I thought that was a sign it was ending.

Day to day, even getting up from a nap I could never predict how I would feel, what kind of mood I was in, and how clear my thoughts would be. Again I thought it was the brain injury. Some of it might still be but being treated for iron deficient anemia should help clear that out.

So here’s to the next few weeks where I take iron supplements to see how much it helps and wondering WTF previous blood work was looking for instead of the answer to most of my health problems?

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supplementsmegamart · 5 years

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Keto Pure Australia Reviews - Is This Diet Pills Scam or Legit?

Keto Pure to help you lose weight! Does it work? Can this exogenous Ketone supplement make your Keto diet more efficient so you will lose weight faster? Do you need this type of supplement at all, just because I want to do the Keto diet? And is it dangerous? People are having a lot of questions regarding using supplements like Keto Pure Diet along with the Keto or Ketosis as well as other diets. In our Keto Pure review, we are going to answer some of these questions and clear any doubts you might have. We are also going to review Pure Keto, so you will know exactly how it works at the end of this article.

WHY USE KETO PURE DIET – THE BENEFITS

Let’s have a quick look at some of the benefits you will get using Keto Pure Diet together with your Ketosis diet.

Make it easier to lose weight overall

Get a faster fat burn that will target your problem areas better

Make it easier for your body to reach ketosis state

Make it easier for your body to burn fat

Help you to avoid the Keto flu

Raise your levels of energy

Improve your brain and cognitive function

Can be used both with High-fat and protein diets

WHAT IS THE KETO DIET?

To be able to understand better how a supplement like Keto Pure can help you lose weight, it is essential to get a deeper understanding of what the Keto diet is all about. The Keto diet is a high-fat diet that will push your body into a ketosis state where you will be burning ketones as your primary source of fuel instead of glucose coming from carbohydrates. Making that switch will make it easier to finally get rid of body fat located on those difficult areas of yours, like on hips, buttocks, and thighs.

WHAT ARE KETONES?

For your body to be able to burn fat instead of glucose, it must first break down the fat coming from your diet and your body, into smaller parts that it can burn as caloric energy. The ketones are made in your liver and will be ready to be used as energy when there is no more glucose available.

YOU ARE WHAT YOU EAT

With the Keto diet, you are going to make dramatic changes to your diet and the way you eat. The nutrition ratio for a regular healthy diet is around 10 to 15% proteins, 55 to 60% carbohydrates, and approximately 20 to 25% fat. With the Keto diet, you are going to turn these numbers upside down. It is necessary else you will keep burning glucose instead of ketones. To be able to do burn ketones you will have to increase your fat intake to between 65 and 75%. Most people will also have to raise their protein intake to around 20 to 25%. The rest of the 5 to 10% are carbohydrates. To become successful with the keto diet, you will have to eliminate almost all your carbohydrates from your diet.

SAYING GOOD-BYE TO CARBOHYDRATES

Just the thought of having to eliminate almost all carbohydrates from your diet is the hardest to swallow for most people. Ideas of saying goodbye to sugars, bread, rice, and others starches, feels like saying goodbye to an old friend. And it doesn’t make it easier that you cannot have any of them on cheat days. Carbohydrates are off limit when using the Keto diet.

THE TRUTH ABOUT CARBOHYDRATES – YOU REALLY DON’T NEED THEM

The truth about carbohydrates is that it is not a nutrient that is necessary for your body, in fact, you are much better off burning fat as fuel than carbohydrates. On top of that, it is healthier too when you first have finished the transition phase. Also, keep in mind, that our ancestors the caveman and woman, barely had any carbohydrates in their diet. It was limited to berries and perhaps fruits they could plug from the trees. And, they did just fine. Obesity was not a problem back then as it is now because we combine carbohydrates with fat.

CARBOHYDRATES ARE TOO POWERFUL

The problem of having carbohydrates in our diet is mere that they are too powerful. It is thanks to the glucose which is the most natural molecule for your body to convert into pure energy. It is so compelling that you don’t need a lot of it before it begins to end up as body fat that is too dense that it is challenging to get rid of.

INSULIN LEVELS

On top of that, you are also facing another issue here; your insulin levels will go sky high because it is needed for the conversion of glucose into body fat.

THINK ABOUT IT

I know it sounds difficult saying goodbye to all your favorite carbohydrates. Also, because you cannot have cheat days on Sundays having your ideal carbohydrates. It will simply push you out of Ketosis, so you will have to stick to the plan all the way.

CREATING NEW HABITS

Saying goodbye to carbohydrates and become successful using the Keto diet is all about creating new habits. When you first have gotten used to it, no longer will it be difficult not to have sugar, bread, or rice? Remember a new world of food will open up to you! After all the Keto diet is not all about eating bacon all the time either.

WHAT IS KETO PURE DIET?

Keto Pure is an exogenous Ketone weight loss supplement that you with great benefits can use not only to make the Keto diet easier to maintain, but also to make it more efficient so you will lose weight faster. You can use the Keto Pure supplement either with high-fat or high-protein diets. But here we will mainly focus on using Pure Keto together with the Keto Diet.

KETO PURE DIET AND BHB SALTS

One of the reasons why Keto Pure Diet can be so useful for your weight loss diet is because of the BHB salts it delivers. BHB stands for Beta-hydroxybutyrate and is the most crucial energy molecule your body has available when you are in ketosis. Since you are adding Beta-hydroxybutyrate instead of waiting for your liver to produce it, it means that Keto Pure and its BHB salts are going to give your body a shortcut into ketosis. On top of that, because you are adding BHB, it will also become more comfortable for your body to stay in ketosis. You will not be cycling in and out which often happens for unexperienced Keto dieters. There are a lot more benefits combining Keto Pure Diet and BHB salts with your Ketosis diet; we will get back to them shortly.

BHB SALTS – BETA-HYDROXYBUTYRATE

So what exactly are BHB salts in Pure Keto Diet and what makes them so useful when combining them with the Keto Diet? Beta-hydroxybutyrate makes up around 78% of the total amount of ketones in your blood. It is the most important one when you want to convert fat into an energy molecule your body can use. The other molecules are Acetoacetate (AcAc) which is around 20% and then Acetone which is tiny, only 2%.

SIDE EFFECTS – IS KETO PURE DIET DANGEROUS TO USE?

If you are a normal healthy and sound person, the Pure Keto Diet will not cause any serious side effects. However, in rare cases when you are starting out, you might feel some of these issues

Being dizzy

Fatigue

A headache

Irritability

Brain fog

Craving sugar

Nausea

Muscle cramps

Normally these issues will go away after a day or two. If you have any health conditions or doubts, it is highly recommended that you consult your doctor.

HOW KETO PURE WILL HELP YOU LOSE WEIGHT?

The Keto Diet is a highly effective diet, but it can be somewhat complicated to get efficient enough to promote a weight loss. It is why you need a supplement like Keto Pure Diet, that simply will make all the issues and processes of the Keto diet a lot easier to handle. Let’s have a closer look at the different phases of the Keto diet and take a look at how Keto Pure will help you out.

THE TRANSITION PHASE

Before your body can burn fat and ketones and use them as the primary source of fuel, you will have to do a transition. You will have to eliminate almost all carbohydrates from your diet and exchange them with high-fat foods. Remember, it is not really about getting started eating bacon or layers of fat 24/7. Instead, you maintain a healthy diet containing fatty fish, ground meat, avocados, and other high-fat vegetables. In the transition phase, it is also about switching your carbohydrate digesting enzymes to the ones that digest fat instead.

KETO PURE AND THE TRANSITION PHASE

Usually, this period will take a few days, but you can often make the transition faster by using Keto Pure Diet. Overall here, Pure Keto will make the transition phase a lot easier. It will add the BHB salts so you will be making the ketones a lot faster than average.

AVOID THE KETO FLU

The Keto Flu is a condition that may last several days where people are struggling with headaches, fatigues, low energy, and flu-like symptoms. It happens because you are between two stages and it is hard for your body to do the makeover. The biggest problem with the Keto flu is that it may destroy your motivation for doing the Keto diet, thinking that it is not for you. However, when you use the Keto Pure, you will make the transition a lot easier, and it will help you to avoid the Keto flu overall. If you do feel some flu-like symptoms, you will get over them faster when using Keto Pure Diet.

NO LONGER CYCLE IN AND OUT OF KETOSIS

As you probably already know, the Keto diet is not the easiest diet to do. Having too many carbs and you may end up cycling in and out of Ketosis making your weight loss diet inefficient. When using Pure Keto Diet, you will have a little more space for these minor errors meaning you will not end up cycling in and out of Keto all the time. Therefore using Keto Pure will make your weight loss diet more efficient.

USING KETO PURE TO GET BACK INTO KETO

Let’s say you went to a birthday party or a wedding, and you ended up having a piece of the cake and a lot of carbs because you had a good time. At this point you will be out of ketosis, Glucose will be back in power, and you will have to fight your way back into ketosis. What you can do if these things happen on your diet, is just to take an extra capsule or two of Keto Pure. It will make it easier to get your body back into ketosis. Overall, you will have much more control over your diet when using Keto Pure along with your Keto diet.

LIMIT ALL YOUR TRIAL AND ERRORS

If this is your first or second time on the Keto diet, then using an exogenous Ketone supplement will merely help you to avoid some of the many pitfalls, trials, and errors you may run into. If you are an experienced user already, you are probably aware of them already. Here Keto Pure Diet can be the supplement making it easier to overcome these issues.

OTHER WAYS KETO PURE DIET WILL MAKE IT EASIER FOR YOU

Keto Ultra Diet and Muscle Building Until now we have put our focus on using Keto Pure together with your Keto diet. However, there are a couple of more benefits you will get from using Keto Pure with any diet. Let’s have a quick look at them.

BUILDING LEAN MUSCLES AND STRENGTH

If you like to workout hard in the gym, Keto Pure Diet can be a great help to optimize your fat burn, improve your protein synthesis and by making sure you get plenty of energy to train hard. It is the perfect supplement to use during periods of cutting, where you want to get rid of body fat and get some more definition. When using the Keto Diet for muscle building you just have to make sure to keep your protein intake a little higher than usual. Still, limit your carbohydrate intake and ramp up your fat intake.

WHAT ABOUT PROTEIN POWDERS?

For sure you can use protein supplements together with Keto Pure Diet. You just have to make sure it is a Keto friendly protein powder with no carbohydrates.

IMPROVE YOUR ENERGY LEVELS

When you first have eliminated glucose from your body and switched into fat burning enzymes, you will be able to increase your energy levels using pure Keto. The ketones it provides is an excellent source of energy, that often will last longer, during a workout session.

IMPROVE YOUR FOCUS AND LEVELS OF CONCENTRATION

The problem using glucose as a source of energy for your brain is that it often creates a big spike in your blood sugar levels. The conversion will be too fast, and that will cause your brain to crash. It shows by you having issues maintaining a high level of concentration and feel like a nap. Keto Pure Diet, on the other hand, will provide you with a constant flow of fuel for your brain. It will make it possible to stay focused and concentrated longer.

OUR KETO PURE REVIEW SUMMARY

For sure you can go on the Keto diet without using supplements like Keto Pure Diet. But if you don’t know what you are doing, you may risk doing a lot of trials and errors, especially if it is your first time. With the Keto diet trial and errors means you will be cycling in and out of Keto and will have to do it all over, every time. Using an exogenous Ketone weight loss supplement like Pure Keto Diet and the BHB salts will make your whole experience a lot easier. No longer will you be cycling in and out of Keto in such a degree that it becomes a waste of your time. Keto Pure Diet is also a great supplement to use if you feel you want to have better control over your diet. It is nice to have something to use if you’re going to get back into ketosis as fast as possible.

DO WE APPROVE OR DISAPPROVE USING KETO PURE DIET FOR WEIGHT LOSS?

Keto Pure Diet is a little expensive if you only buy one bottle, but you will get a reasonable bottle price when buying more, which you likely are going to need anyway. The most significant advantage of using Keto Pure is the security it gives you, making it easier for your body to stay in ketosis burning fat. Remember, to make pure Keto help you lose weight; you must follow a high-fat or high-protein diet. It will not cause you to lose weight alone.

>> CLICK HERE TO BUY KETO PURE DIET <<

HOW TO BUY KETO PURE DIET?

Keto Pure Diet is not available in GNC, at Walmart or any brick and mortar store. You will not be able to find it at Amazon, or eBay either. To get started you will have to go to the Official Keto Pure Diet website and buy it from there. The good news about buying directly from the manufacturer itself is that it entitles you to get some significant savings when buying in bulk, currently up to $150 on the most significant package. On top of that, you will get free shipping on all packages.

KETO PURE DIET PRICE

The regular price for one bottle of Keto Pure Diet is $79.94, but currently, you can save $20 and get one bottle for $59.94 including free shipping. If you decide to by in bulk, you can get one bottle of Keto Pure for as low as $29.60. Remember to click at the right package that suits your needs, when you check out.

GETTING STARTED BUYING KETO PURE

To learn a lot more about pure Keto Diet and how it can help you to make your Keto diet a huge success or get started to buy Keto Pure Diet, just click on the link below. It will take you to a particular page a Keto Pure Diet.

>> CLICK HERE TO BUY KETO PURE DIET TODAY <<

How to buy Keto Ultra Diet and get started?

ALSO, CHECK OUT THESE GREAT ARTICLES AND SUPPLEMENTS

There are a lot more tips and tweaks to learn when you want to make your keto success a successful one. For instance, check out this article How To Become Successful With The Keto Diet If You Just Love Carbs! It will give you a couple of tips on how you can learn to curb your cravings for carbohydrates while doing the Keto diet. One of the greatest difficulties when going on a Keto diet is to get your body in Ketosis! The truth you can actually do it in 24 hours or less. To see how to check out this article How To Get In Ketosis In 24 Hours And Start Your Weight Loss Journey. You can also check out more reviews regarding Keto Pure and how it will make you lose weight. Finally, if you from reading this article just have figured out that the Keto diet is not you for, then I highly recommend you to check out our latest PhenQ review. It is a powerful supplement that can help you lose weight with a unique 5 in 1 approach.

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earlypregnancysymptom-blog1 · 5 years

Text

First Trimester Pregnancy Symptoms

First Trimester Pregnancy Symptoms In pregnancy, some women experience many symptoms and signs while others experience few. Nevertheless, a lot of the symptoms are especially common, and nearly all women that are pregnant will experience more than one of those symptoms and signs of pregnancy. The symptoms and signs of early pregnancy are simple to recognize, particularly if this isn’t your first pregnancy. Irrespective of how often you get pregnant, the symptoms and signs of early pregnancy are the same. Check the signs and the best thing is to read throughout the article. The more you have the more likely you’re to be pregnant.

The blastocyst will implant in the uterus lining and start stage first TrimesterSomewhere from the sixth to twelfth day after conception. Cessation of your period is a clear sign you might be pregnant. The confusion sets in as a period might be due to sickness, stress, and fluctuations. Cessation of a polycystic ovary syndrome and contraceptives can result in a period. In case your period happens missing a period can be an indication. You could experience signs and symptoms such as mood changes, food cravings, headache, fatigue, constipation, incontinence, aversions, dizziness and breast tenderness. Nearly all women say that the next trimester if much easier compared to the first trimester. You will likely notice that symptoms such as extreme and dizziness fatigue are going away. Nevertheless, there are new symptoms and signs developing. Your pregnancy belly will expand and the most wonderful thing is you’ll feel your baby beginning to move. You could also present common symptoms such as body aches, stomach itching, swelling of the ankles, fingers, and face, stretch marks on some parts of the body such as the stomach, upper thighs, and etc. Congratulations. You’ve reached this far. You Need to know that usually, other discomforts you’d in your second trimester continue. The most typical problems here are the difficulty breathing, heartburn, hemorrhoids, insomnia, contractions or breast tenderness, which might show also a watery pre-milk also known as colostrum.

The child begins to gain weight along with his length would be now somewhere between 16 to 18 inches. The baby’s organ became fully developed, especially the lungs continue maturing until birth date. At this point, the mother is providing the unborn kid with antibodies. Antibodies help protect the infant against certain diseases. The most typical foods to trigger nausea throughout the first weeks of pregnancy are coffee, spicy foods, meat products, and milk. Nevertheless, you ought to know that literally anything can trigger morning illness during pregnancy. It’s also essential to realize that all pregnancies aren’t the same and, therefore, pregnancy symptoms aren’t the same for all women.

First Trimester Pregnancy Symptoms

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24hourchampagnediet-blog1 · 5 years

Text

‘I followed Halle Berry’s keto diet for a week, and the results surprised me’

New Post has been published on https://bestrawfoodrecipes.com/i-followed-halle-berrys-keto-diet-for-a-week-and-the-results-surprised-me/

‘I followed Halle Berry’s keto diet for a week, and the results surprised me’

At almost 53 years of age, Halle Berry looks better than most 30-year-olds. She’s one of those unicorns (like J.Lo and Pharrell Williams) who have somehow managed to press pause on the ageing process and sail through middle age with nary a frown line.

Beautiful jerks.

And although it might seem like witchcraft at work, there are very specific lifestyle choices that have helped Ms Berry achieve her age-defying looks.

Lucky for us, the actress is a giver. She’s very open about her health routine, regularly sharing skincare, diet and fitness tips to Instagram.

As one of the many 30-year-olds who look no-where near as good as this former Bond girl, I thought I’d give part of her health routine a whirl. Namely: her diet.

If you’re wondering why I didn’t take on her entire fitness routine, the reason is that she works out with a trainer five days a week and on her days off, hikes. If I were to hire my PT five days a week, I’d need to take out a loan. And I live in New York, which means hiking trails are limited. Unless walks in the park count?

Anyway.

Long story, short: I skipped the training and adopted Berry’s keto diet for a week.

If you’re unfamiliar with ketogenic or “keto” eating plans, allow me to introduce you to the diet of the moment. It’s basically the silk leopard print skirt of the diet world.

The goal with keto is to drive your body to run off fuel produced from stored fat, instead of using glucose from carbohydrates. This state is called ketosis.

Many swear by this style of eating for weight loss, but like most diets, it has also been widely criticised.

“A diet like this is lacking the body’s main and preferred source of energy: carbohydrates,” Accredited Practising Dietitian, Emily Hardman told me.

“…common side effects seen with following a diet low in carbohydrates include low energy levels, headaches, weakness, irritability and poor digestion.”

On the other hand, Keto Nutritionist Christine Cronau says part of the diet’s negative rap comes from quitting too early:

“It takes about 4 weeks to become fat-adapted,” she said.

“In the meantime, as the body runs low on glucose – before it switches to fat – you may feel quite ordinary and may even experience keto flu: headaches, dizziness, fatigue and more.”

It’s worth pointing out here that a recent article published by Harvard Medical School stated that only short-term weight loss results from keto diets have been studied.

Suffice it to say that I went into the challenge feeling a little unsure. But into it I dove.

Here’s what I found:

My diet became repetitive, but not impossible

Using a combination of Berry’s Instagram account and interviews with her trainer, I formed an idea of the actress’ food plan and ran with it.

I drank coffee in the morning with a teaspoon of MCT oil and unsweetened almond milk. MCT is derived from coconut oil and is believed to assist with energy levels, fat-burning and cravings.

My meals were usually made with eggs or a meat protein along with vegetables, avocado and cheese. Occasionally I used tofu noodles or shredded zucchini instead of grains. The tofu wasn’t bad, but zucchini is not even a close substitute for pasta.

I felt sick at first

One of the things Cronau warned me about was increasing my fat intake too quickly. I’m assuming I did precisely that because I felt nauseated for the first two days. I also experienced headaches and fatigue.

Eating out wasn’t as terrible as I expected

While restaurants and their complimentary bread baskets tested my resolve, eating out wasn’t the *worst*. I’d just order fish and veggies or a grilled chicken sandwich, of which I’d only eat the fillings. It was mildly depressing, but doable.

I drank alcohol but only ever one glass of dry wine (and half a beer that I gave in to one time – sorry Halle!).

By the end of the week, I looked slimmer

When I got to day five, I felt less tired, and my nausea was gone. I also saw a clear difference in my figure; I looked more defined and less bloated.

But would I stick to this diet? Nah.

It might work for Berry, but cutting out an entire food group is just not sustainable for me. Yes, there are substitutes, but I don’t want to spend my time baking low-carb ‘bread’ or telling myself zucchini noodles are spaghetti.

I guess we all can’t be ageless unicorns like Halle Berry. But I might order one of the anti-ageing face masks she uses, just in case…

Source link Keto Diet Definition

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fuckyeahtattoogirls-blog1 · 5 years

Text

‘I followed Halle Berry’s keto diet for a week, and the results surprised me’

New Post has been published on https://bestrawfoodrecipes.com/i-followed-halle-berrys-keto-diet-for-a-week-and-the-results-surprised-me/

‘I followed Halle Berry’s keto diet for a week, and the results surprised me’

Beautiful jerks.

And although it might seem like witchcraft at work, there are very specific lifestyle choices that have helped Ms Berry achieve her age-defying looks.

Lucky for us, the actress is a giver. She’s very open about her health routine, regularly sharing skincare, diet and fitness tips to Instagram.

As one of the many 30-year-olds who look no-where near as good as this former Bond girl, I thought I’d give part of her health routine a whirl. Namely: her diet.

Anyway.

Long story, short: I skipped the training and adopted Berry’s keto diet for a week.

If you’re unfamiliar with ketogenic or “keto” eating plans, allow me to introduce you to the diet of the moment. It’s basically the silk leopard print skirt of the diet world.

The goal with keto is to drive your body to run off fuel produced from stored fat, instead of using glucose from carbohydrates. This state is called ketosis.

Many swear by this style of eating for weight loss, but like most diets, it has also been widely criticised.

“A diet like this is lacking the body’s main and preferred source of energy: carbohydrates,” Accredited Practising Dietitian, Emily Hardman told me.

“…common side effects seen with following a diet low in carbohydrates include low energy levels, headaches, weakness, irritability and poor digestion.”

On the other hand, Keto Nutritionist Christine Cronau says part of the diet’s negative rap comes from quitting too early:

“It takes about 4 weeks to become fat-adapted,” she said.

“In the meantime, as the body runs low on glucose – before it switches to fat – you may feel quite ordinary and may even experience keto flu: headaches, dizziness, fatigue and more.”

It’s worth pointing out here that a recent article published by Harvard Medical School stated that only short-term weight loss results from keto diets have been studied.

Suffice it to say that I went into the challenge feeling a little unsure. But into it I dove.

Here’s what I found:

My diet became repetitive, but not impossible

Using a combination of Berry’s Instagram account and interviews with her trainer, I formed an idea of the actress’ food plan and ran with it.

I drank coffee in the morning with a teaspoon of MCT oil and unsweetened almond milk. MCT is derived from coconut oil and is believed to assist with energy levels, fat-burning and cravings.

I felt sick at first

Eating out wasn’t as terrible as I expected

I drank alcohol but only ever one glass of dry wine (and half a beer that I gave in to one time – sorry Halle!).

By the end of the week, I looked slimmer

When I got to day five, I felt less tired, and my nausea was gone. I also saw a clear difference in my figure; I looked more defined and less bloated.

But would I stick to this diet? Nah.

I guess we all can’t be ageless unicorns like Halle Berry. But I might order one of the anti-ageing face masks she uses, just in case…

Source link Keto Diet Definition

0 notes

chelseyroseblog · 6 years

Text

THE KETOGENIC DIET: IS IT HEALTHY? BENEFITS? DOWNSIDES? RESULTS?

Hi ladies!

Okay - it's time. There has been non stop talk about this diet. I've kinda tried it, I've had friends who have tried it, and almost all of my clients have asked me about it at some point so I figured now would be a good time to go over it and give everyone the low down on it's benefits, it's downfalls, it's results and etc.

WHAT IS THE KETOGENIC DIET?

I mean every celeb from Halle Berry, Adriana Lima, Megan Fox, Gweneth Paltrow and the Kardashians have been fans of the ketogenic diet (AKA THE KETO DIET) yet a lot of us are still like, wtf is it...? And how does it realllly work?

But when we go on a low carb (100 grams of carbs or less) or very low carb diet (50 grams of carbs or less) our brain sort of goes into a brain starvation and needs fuel. The liver gets to work and starts making keytones (chemically known as keytone bodies) as a back up source of fuel for the brain.

Ketosis is the name of the metabolic state that your body goes into when you drastically reduce carbs which typically looks like anything from 20 - 50 g of carbs a day or less. To put that into perspective, the average American consumes 225 - 325 grams of carbs A DAY. Which obviously isn't recommended for the standard sedentary American considering approximately 71% of the population in the United States is overweight. (ARTICLE)

To break the keto down a little it further, it's also good to know that there are 3 different kinds of keto diets:

Standard Keto Diet (SKD) - Suggests Low carb (5%), Moderate Protein (20%), High Fat (75%)

Cyclical Keto Diet (CKD) - This one involves periods of higher carb days so it would look like 5 days of keto with 2 high carb days.

Targeted Keto Diet (TKD) - For this keto diet you just add carbs around workouts.

Then there's also something called high protein keto where people will do 60% fat, 35% protein and 5% carbs.

So basically when you're on a keto diet you are dramatically reducing your carb intake and going on a diet that is very high in fat.

But like...my question is...how are we supposed to know when we're actually IN ketosis? Like if I don't eat carbs all day am I in ketosis by the end of it? I dove in on this info as well and this is what I rounded up.

Apparently it's possible for someone to enter ketosis after only 2 days but it could take up to a week. It depends on your activity level, lifestyle, body type and carbohydrate intake. After a few days you can see if you're really in ketosis by checking the amount of keytones in your blood. This is done by blood work or you can get what are called "keytone strips" and test through your urine at home.

What Do You Eat On A Keto Diet?

Low carb veggies - greens, tomatoes, bell peppers, onions.

Avocados - whole or as a guac if you'd like.

Healthy Oils - Extra Virgin Olive Oil, Coconut, Avocado.

Nuts/Seeds - Chia Seeds, Pumpkin Seeds, Flax Seeds, Walnuts, Almonds.

Cheese - Unprocessed Cheese (goat, mozzarella, cheddar).

Butter and Cream - Go for grass fed.

Eggs - Get pasteurized or Omega -3 Whole eggs

Fatty Fish - Mackerel, tuna, trout, salmon.

Meat - Red Meat, Steak, Ham, Sausage, Bacon, Chicken, Turkey.

What You Can't Eat On A Keto Diet

Sugary Foods - Cake, Candy, Pastries, Soda, Fruit Juice.

Grains or Starches - Wheat Products, Cereal, Rice, Pasta.

Fruit - Small portions of berries are the only fruit allowed.

Beans/Legumes - Peas, Kidney Beans, Lentils, Chic Peas.

Root/Starchy Vegetables - Carrots, Potatoes, Sweet Potatoes.

Low Fat Products - Often are higher in sugar/carbs to replace the fats.

Unhealthy Fats - Processed Vegetable Oils, Mayo.

Alcohol - Due to it's carb content, most alcohol will throw you out of ketosis.

Sugar Free Diet Foods - These tend to be highly processed and are often high in sugar alcohols.

KETO DIET RESULTS

So this high fat diet was originally created in the 1920's to help children with epilepsy but at this point there are over 20 studies that show that this type of diet can not only improve your health but it can help people lose weight.

These studies also shows that following a keto diet may help battle diabetes, cancer, and Alzheimer's but the more general results include:

Increased Mental Clarity

More Energy

Weight Loss - how much and how fast depends on; Sleep and stress. People will generally lose 3-10 pounds in the first week which is typically a lot of water weight. Carbs are made of water so this is what most people see first, not necessarily fat being burned off. After the first couple of weeks we can expect 1-2 pounds a week.

A reduced carbohydrate diet will help reduce your blood sugars and increase your blood ketone levels. (According to this article).

IS A KETOGENIC DIET HEALTHY?

There are a ton of articles that go back and forth on whether or not it is healthy but it seems like for the most part - it is. Some of the initial short term side effects include:

Headache

Fatigue

Constipation

Bad Breath

These are some of the initial temporary side effects that usually disappear in a few days or a few weeks.

Keto Flu - Having a drastic reduction in carbs can sort of shock the body and bring on withdrawl type symptoms so some people may experience:

Stomach Pain

Muscle Soreness

Poor Concentration

Dizziness

Muscle Cramps

Weakness

Irritability

Headache

Diarrhea

Constipation

Vomiting

Nausea

Sugar Cravings

Difficulty Sleeping

These things can typically be avoided by drinking more water, avoiding very intense exercise, and replacing electrolytes. When insulin levels decrease, the kidneys release excess sodium so replenish that by having salty, potassium filled, keto friendly foods like leafy green veggies and avocados. Also make sure that you get adequate sleep.

Other but less common side effects include:

Keoacidosis - A condition that occurs in uncontrolled diabetes. This has been reported in women who are breast feeding but it is very uncommon.

Kidney Stones - Also uncommon but there have been cases of epileptic children who have developed kidney stones on a keto diet.

Raised Cholesterol Levels - The "bad" or LDL Cholesterol levels have been known to rise as well as the overall cholesterol on a keto diet due to a higher consumption of saturated fats. This increases your blood pressure and puts you at much greater risk for heart failure.

Do I Recommend A Keto Diet?

So personally, I wouldn't recommend a keto diet to someone but if they wanted to do it, I don't think I would discourage them. What I like about a Keto diet is that it removes one of the biggest food groups that most Americans over consume which is carbohydrates. Carbs are NOT bad though. How much we need to consume depends on our activity levels and I understand that this is where people get confused. We think we need so much more of a carb intake than we really do when in reality, even people that are lifting weights at the gym 5 times a week can get by on a small amount of carbs.

We eat way too many carb sources, and are more sedentary than ever. So when we start a new diet or a new gym membership, there's motivation to get fit and healthy already in place so that's step one. Then there's a sense of structure with what foods you can have and what foods you can't have so what starts happening is you find new foods to eat, you find new things to do, and you exercise more because you're feeling good about yourself.

So if going on the Keto diet HELPS you put those things into place for the long term then I'm all for it. I think where a lot of people go wrong is they hear that because of things like the Keto diet...coconut oil, avocados, chia seeds, flax seeds, butter, bacon, and loads of red meat are now the healthiest things to have.

I'm not saying they're healthy or unhealthy but what I'm saying is that there still isn't a sense of CONTROL and discipline. This causes many people to eat a multiple avocados in a day, on top of a ton of bacon, on top of a few bullet proof coffees and then they don't have the discipline to go on a low carb diet the way the need to in order to be in ketosis, so they over consume even more calories, and think they're being "healthy" while they're at it because the food choices are primarily healthy.

Is this making sense?

I think the best choice would be to get a health coach (I'm right here!) and spend some time addressing you're unhealthy patterns and build in a strong foundation of new healthy habits that will allow you to make good choices and be knowledgable on how much food your specific body really needs!

Keto Recipes

With all of that said - I tend to learn towards a diet that is primarily protein, then fats, then I usually get 50-90g total carbs a day so I'm obviously not in Ketosis but I am cautious of my carb intake and have always created recipes to align with that. Here's some ideas on my blog for you to check out!

MORNING POWER UP SMOOTHIE

BBQ TURKEY BOWL

KALE SALAD WITH A HOMEMADE DRESSING

HOMEMADE CEVICHE WITH FARMERS MARKET INGREDIENTS

What Experts Are Saying About The Keto Diet:

If you want some more info, here is a list of some people I've come across who wither support the keto diet or feel like it's not ideal. I got lost reading about so many different opinions and then I go MEGA lost once I started watching all of the videos on YouTube surrounding the "fad" diet. (Especially on Joe Rogan's page).

1. ABBEY SHARP - RD - BLOG - "First of all, I can’t deny the fact that people will lose weight on a keto diet. Here’s why. First of all, you’re eliminating a major food group. When you do that, you limit your food options and most likely your food intake, so it’s not rocket science that you’ll likely lose weight. Second, most people on a low carb diet tend to increase their protein intake in the absence of carbs and there is some evidence that consuming higher amounts of protein may have some weight loss benefits. "

2. MCKEL HILL - MS - RDN - LDN - BLOG - "There are many success stories out there and people who swear that ketogenic diets have worked for them and make them feel incredible, which is amazing! On that same note, the opposite story is true for those who it didn’t work for — it’s like this with diets across the board, there are no one-size fits all. I encourage you to think deeply about the motivation whenever you embark or entertain trying out a diet — is it for health, to make you feel your best, is it sustainable, will it allow you to socialize and enjoy the other beautiful moments of life, or will it cause you stress micromanaging your diet?"

3. KELLY LEVEQUE ON LAURENCONRAD.COM - HOLISTIC NUTRITIONIST - WELLNESS EXPERT - CELEBRITY HEALTH COACH - BLOG - "Kelly recommends first trying keto as a 6-week reset. It is perfectly fine to do keto long term, as it provides great brain fuel and it’s anti-cancer, and anti-inflammatory. However, you will just want to make sure that if you are making it your lifestyle diet, you’ll never want to skimp on leafy greens and veggies or start replacing your healthy fats like coconut oil and avocado with unhealthy fats like lots of processed cheese and cured meats like pepperoni (which are high in fat, but not the good kind). It’s also a good idea to add a little more sodium into your diet when trying keto. Having a glass of pink salt water when you feel tired or dehydrated on keto can work wonders."

4. TANYA ZUCKERBOT - MS - RD - ON THE POPSUGARFITNESS - BLOG- "Sounds like a diet with benefits, right? Sure, this way of eating can be spot-on for certain individuals, and it may even be easy to sustain, but there's no way to avoid the shaky transition, which can result in some unsettling side effects, often called the "keto flu,""

5. THE BALANCED BLONDE has a great podcast also that you can listen to here, where she chats with Kelly Leveque and "total keto expert" Wes Okerson about the Keto diet. EPISODE #14!

Have you guys tried the keto diet? If so what are your thoughts?!

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