#the feeling of having that sort of power over jackie after decades of her being worlds out of reach was intoxicating

[stewblog]

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings more or less immediately became one of my favorite movies in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Some of this is due to it being one of the best American-made martial arts movies I’ve ever seen. Some of this is due to it delivering some incredibly cool moments and imagery, the likes of which we haven’t really seen much of in the MCU, much less in American filmmaking in general these days. But it’s due also in large part to the fact that the movie is consistently fun, funny, brimming with exhilarating action scenes and moves like a rocket. It’s just a genuinely great time at the movies and I found myself grinning from ear to ear for most of its (just over) two hour runtime. There are more than 20 MCU movies, and while I highly enjoy most of them, it definitely felt like it was time for Marvel to deliver something different than yet another costumed superhero outing. And that’s precisely what’s been done here with Shang-Chi giving audiences a straight-up kung fu adventure film.

In a way, the excellence of Shang-Chi as an action movie is bittersweet. The action scenes were designed and shot by Brad Allan, a brilliant martial artist who spent years as a member of Jackie Chan’s personal stunt team. He had truly come into his own as an action designer and choreographer but met an untimely death about a month before this film’s release. What he delivered here alongside director Destin Daniel Cretton is some of the most impressive hand-to-hand action I’ve seen in an American action film.

Marvel movies have had plenty of exciting and fun action scenes but, as is the case with so many Western films, the performers simply lack the training and capability to convincingly pull off what is shown off with aplomb in many Asian films. That is absolutely not the case here thanks to the exceptional skill shown off by the likes of Simu Liu, Tony Leung, Michelle Yeoh and nearly every other actor who throws hands (and feet). Allan may be gone, but he left a heck of a legacy on-screen here and it is absolutely exhilarating to watch. Capable, highly trained actors being filmed in wide shots without an excess of editing to cover up their inadequacies makes for exciting cinema. Who knew?!

Though it is brimming with excellent action, the heart of Shang-Chi is actually found in the familial drama driving the plot. Shaun (Liu) is a fairly typical 20-something in San Francisco. He’s mostly content to work his day job as a parking valet with his best friend, Katy (Awkwafina) before spending their nights carousing and doing karaoke. But after Shaun kicks the living tar out of a group of henchmen, including a guy with a literal sword for an arm, on a bus, Katy demands to know who her lifelong friend actually is. Turns out his real name is Shang-Chi and he’s actually the son of a history-defining warlord who’s been alive for thousands of years thanks to ten powerful, magical (possibly alien) rings who trained Shaun since childhood to be an assassin. Ya know, normal stuff.

Shang-Chi’s dad, Wenwu (Leung), thinks he’s found a way to enter the mystical, ancient city his wife hailed from. Though she died more than a decade ago, Wenwu is certain he’s heard her voice calling to him to set her free from captivity. Though he’s willing to fight and kill to do so, Wenwu mostly just wants to reunite his family, and he especially wants his son to take up the mantle of leading the Ten Rings, his millennia-old crime organization.

Shang-Chi is, as expected, not too hip to his abusive father’s plans, but there still clearly resides in him a desire to be loved and accepted by Wenwu. It’s that push and pull between the light and dark within him that drives Shang-Chi’s emotional journey as he slowly comes to realize he can’t ever fully run from or hide his lineage, try as he might.

Liu has been acting for the better part of a decade (I really need to check out Kim’s Convenience) but this is without question his breakout performance and he handles leading man duties well. He’s handsome and funny, and though his charisma is somewhat low-key, he’s able to project enough stoic gravitas that you can always get a sense of what he’s feeling. If nothing else, he’s primed for a string of action roles based on how superbly he pulls off each fight scene. It’s always thrilling to watch a performer pull off their own stunts and fight moves, but Liu brings a very visible energy to his combat.

The real treat here, though, is watching Tony Leung make his Big Hollywood Debut. Leung is one of China’s biggest movie stars and he’s given more than enough incredible performances in truly amazing films to cement his status as one of the all-time great actors. But there’s something uniquely fun seeing him not just let loose in a big budget blockbuster, but to do so and not water down his trademark intensity. Leung’s greatest skill has always been his ability to communicate so much with just his eyes, and that intensity and passion is on full display here. Whatever shortcomings the script might have barely matter because Leung tells you everything you need to know about Wenwu with just a look.

If there’s a major shortcoming here it’s that there are elements of the script that feel notably undercooked. In particular there’s a moment before the big finale where Shang-Chi is brooding over his father’s treatment of him as a child, questioning whether or not he’s still just the assassin he was raised to be. It feels like something from a different version of the script where that self-doubt played a much larger part than what made it to screen.

And, as seems contractually obligated in these movies, the climax culminates with a lot of Typical CGI Nonsense. Though at least here that Typical CGI Nonsense is delivering a look at some mythical beasties and imagery that we don’t often get in these sorts of movies.

None of those frustrating elements (not even the often horribly glaring use of green screen composite shots) detracts enough from the experience to make this anything less than a total blast to watch. I’ve come to accept that most Marvel movies are simply going to have frustrating or undercooked elements to them in one way or another. But even grading on that curve, Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings still manages to feel like a complete, thrilling package, one that I can’t wait to watch again.

Author’s Note: If you walk out of Shang-Chi jonesing for some more Tony Leung, check out The Grandmaster if you want more of him doing kung fu. Watch In the Mood for Love if you want one of his best, most internalized acting performances. And watch Hard Boiled if you want to see him co-star in one of the greatest, most over-the-top action movies ever made.

[schnitzelbutterfingers]

To Someone Special (Ethan Ramsey x f!MC)

notes: happy holidays! please take the time to celebrate with your family and friends. 2020 was an egregious year, but let’s thank god for letting us survive through the whole COVID pandemic. let’s pray for everyone to get through this. 

anyways, here is my christmas present to you all, wrapped with some angst and fluff! ethan’s ex-girlfriend from his med school days who cheated on him with another ‘friend’ (and no, it’s not tobias :)) makes an appearance hehe. forgive me if there are any spelling mistakes and grammar errors, and as always enjoy! (ɔ◔‿◔)ɔ ♥

(i felt like this was similar to @jamespotterthefirst ‘s fic ‘Fake Husband/Wife’, so i asked permission to write this, and she gave me it. shoutout to bree!)

summary: On Christmas, 10 years ago, he gave his heart to a girl. The very next day, she gave it away. This Christmas, to save him from tears, Ethan will give it to someone special.

pairing(s): dr. ethan ramsey x f!mc (dr. abigail ‘abby’ chacko) || mentions of past dr. ethan ramsey x dr. aubrie zavala

warning(s): angst (mentions of cheating) and fluff (mentions of proposal)

word count: 1999

** i suggest you listen to ‘last christmas’ by wham! :) **

_______________________________________________________________

‘The most wonderful time of the year.’

If it were years ago, Ethan would chuckle at the preposterousness of this statement. 

To everyone else, the Christmas season is full of jubilation, nostalgia and generosity. Giving and donating had become a peculiarity of the days neighboring the observed holiday, street-corners crowded with Santas ringing golden bells. 

Houses twinkled with multi-colored and pulsing lights, bouncing off the crystalline white snow. Inside the houses, trees glimmered with more colorful lights and various decorative ornaments. Christmas colors added sumptuousness. Classic poinsettias are tied, and candy canes add some idiosyncrasy, dangling from the mouths of exhilarated children. Joyful music and golden bells can be heard from everyone’s car.

To the senior doctor, it’s dissimilar. Christmas means more work to do at the hospital. Emergency rooms are filled with injured patients who were looking forward to blithesome moments with their friends and family. The roads are slick with shiny ice, vehicles slipping across the road to hit the one next to it or a broad tree. And the mistletoe. On one occasion, he had to escape an elderly grandmother with wrinkly skin and gray hair, who was convinced that he was Bob Dylan. Yet he wasn’t even an accurate replica and they didn’t sound the same.

Seeing other interns and derisory people kiss under the mistletoe makes him turn away with disgust. He cordially hated PDA. Well, that is, until he met her.

When Ethan met Abigail, however, he felt some sort of attraction to her, something he couldn’t escape from, no matter how hard he tried. Her compassion, her wit, her charm, her intelligence, her everything. 

It felt like some sort of grip she had, her usual chocolate aroma, big brown eyes, wavy hair, and her milky skin all holding on to him like a police officer would do to a criminal. And it’s addicting.

But now, looking at his Rookie from across their luxurious bedroom, getting ready for the Christmas Gala hosted by Bloom Edenbrook Hospital, he started to look forward to the breathless moments under the mistletoe. On second thought, why does he need to kiss Abby under the mistletoe when he can kiss her anywhere? They are officially dating, after all.

He wanted to satisfy her and hear her singing goofily along with the carols in their cars. He wanted to see her tastefully decorate their penthouse with stockings, ornaments, a garland. He wanted to see her making sticky toffee pudding and her longtime favorite gulab jamuns, even if he claims he doesn’t like sugar. She, in return, would constantly mock him, prompting him of the day when he focused his eyes on the delicious chocolate bar in the vending machine at the hospital. He wanted it all with her.

Abby was adorning a long sleeve crimson velvet dress, strikingly showing some cleavage. She wore a generous split from her right thigh down, parading her creamy legs. She looked divine. She looked like heaven. The red gown made her look scandalous. 

She cleared her throat, smirking at him staring at her. “Are you finished?”

“You look...” The more conventional doctor was at a loss of words, looking at her up and down. He started from her soiled velvet heels, moving up to her wavy cafe hair.

“...sinful.”

Abby flashed him a sly grin. “Why, thank you, Doctor. You don’t look too bad yourself.”

Indeed he doesn’t. Ethan sported a matching outfit, a suit with a red velvet coat black shirt and a crimson bowtie.

“I can’t wait to come back after this gala. You’re making me lose my patience.”

She chortled, lovely music to his ears. “Then what are you waiting for? Let’s go!”

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The gala invited all the hospitals in Boston, including Mass Kenmore. It was being held at The Seaport World Trade Center, one of the largest venues in the city. Ethan and Abby arrived at the front of the venue, walking towards the entrance. Inside, a waiter took them to the very front table, the one where their seats were reserved.

They were recognized as the ‘rich couple’ and the ‘power couple’ of Edenbrook. It was no surprise that some of the doctors decided to gossip about them, stating how they match and look excellent together. Some women were jealous, and Abby could feel covetous eyes burning behind her back. The male doctors were also envious of Ethan, that he got to be with the young graceful doctor. In return, Ethan winded his protecting arm tighter around her slim waist, a clear mark that she is his. Only his. 

The front table additionally included Naveen, Harper, Tanaka, and Tobias Carrick. When Ethan and Tobias faced encountered other at the front table, the Mass Kenmore doctor somehow took his hand out, waiting for the famous diagnostician to shake it. Ethan was stupefied at first, but then he remembered what Tobias did for them, saving his Rookie from the maitotoxin. After a rare moment Ethan shook it, sending the latter a faint smile, to which he returned. Abby beamed at their interaction, glad that they finally cleared the air that had been surrounding them for more than a decade.

Naveen greeted both of them with a hearty hug, and Harper sent both of them a pleasant smile. The Chacko looked around the decorated room to discover her friends, all relaxing at a table. When she spotted them, she gave them a huge wave, to which they imitated back. It relaxed her to have Ethan and her friends in the same room, forgetting about the upcoming discussions with the money-eating scumbags who only care about wealth and not for the wellbeing of their patients.

Tobias and Ethan sat between Abby, and all the seats were filled except for one.

As if interpreting her thoughts, Tobias sought a confused question. “Are we expecting someone else at our table?”

“I believe we are,” Naveen answered.

The young doctor wanted to talk to her friends for a little while. Otherwise, everyone was roaming around, mingling with people.

Ethan seemed to detect this because he leaned in to whisper to her ear. “If you want to hang out with your friends, you can go ahead. It’s understandable, if you’re bored, as am I. Besides, I’ll just talk to Tobias.”

Abby sent him a grateful smile, not only for excusing her, but because he wanted to talk to his old (former?) friend. She was genuinely happy that their relationship is getting better and better.

In return, she bestowed him a kiss on his cheek and went to the table across the room, where her colleagues are. 

Her friends said the usual. Bryce and Kyra are dating, and they adopted a puppy after moving in together. Sienna doesn’t think she will move on from Danny, and that her heart will always belong to him, but the enormous pain had subsided. Elijah and Phoebe went on another date which had gone really well. Jackie’s debt is under control, and she said that she felt at peace and tranquility. 

After she had finished socializing, she looked back to her reserved table, where she saw a woman, a rather charming one, probably in her 30s. She had raven hair and porcelain skin, and was assuming a royal blue dress with an elegant split across her left thigh, displaying her beautiful legs. Standing next to her boyfriend. Being too touchy with her man. Abby was ordinarily not the type to be jealous, but looking at the woman made herself feel ugly.

Her eyes went to Ethan, who had a horrified look on his face. They moved to Tobias who had a similar expression. Naveen and Harper both had uncomfortable looks.

The latter captured her eye and came up to her.

Abby was confused, so she decided to convey this confusion to Carrick. “Is everything alright at our table? Is that woman the last person to occupy the empty seat?”

Carrick sighed deeply. “She... is Dr. Aubrie Zavala. Another famous diagnostician... She is also Ethan’s ex-girlfriend.”

That’s when she glanced back at their table and saw both of them arguing.

Tobias must have noted this because he replied, “Ethan and Aubrie are both arguing now. Back in Hopkins, she cheated on with another med student named Dillan, I think. And it was at Christmas. Now Aubrie wants him back.”

The cacophonous racket heard in the auditorium drained away from the ears of the young doctor, and the sounds of warning bells replaced it. 

What the hell am I supposed to do to grab her butt off the table?

Suddenly, an idea popped into her head. She examined her bag and found a fake diamond ring. Her mother gave this to her; she saw this at the store and found it pretty. Abigail always kept it in her bag, a reminder that her mom loves her. It looks real, so this can work. The Chacko placed the ring on her left ring finger. Tobias, knowing what Abby was about to do, gave her a wink. She smiled back and walked over to their table.

“Babe? What’s wrong?” Abby asked innocently. Ethan’s oceanic eyes widened as he saw the mischievous gleam in her coffee eyes. 

The woman, who was now dubbed Aubrie, turned around to look at her with a grim expression. 

“Babe?” Aubrie threatened lowly, “Who the hell do you think you are, calling my Ethan ‘babe’?” Oh, this girl has it coming.

Abby offered her a fierce smile, showing off her properly ‘engagement’ ring. “Well, I’m pretty sure I called my fiancée babe, right Ethan?” 

Instantly, Ethan understood. She wanted to play as his wife-to-be now, did she? Well, that can be easily arranged, Ethan smirks, deciding to play along.

“Well, you see, Dr. Zavala, you do remember how I love hearing the opera, don’t you? I took Abby to one of my favorite operas named Carmen, and I proposed to her there. She cried happy tears and said ‘yes’.”

Aubrie’s furious face slowly drained of color, as she realized they are engaged. She now has to live with the regrets from the past. Her violent hands started to shake a little as she realized who she was arguing with the whole time.

“Wait, are you Dr. Abigail Chacko? One of the youngest doctors in America, Sister of the famous surgeon Sebastian Chacko, the youngest member of Edenbrook’s diagnostic team, and the person who cured Dr. Naveen Banerji?” Zavala asked slowly, her shrill voice starting to grow tense.

Abby, on the other hand, was having too much fun with this. “Bingo! You got it right!”

Right away, when she said that, Aubrie reluctantly left the whole table, stomping on the way like a teenager. Naveen and Harper both had amusing smiles on their faces, Tobias tried not to choke on his wine, and Ethan had the biggest smirk ever. 

Abby took off her fake ring and placed it in her bag. At once, Ethan gave her a sounding kiss on her plump lips, not minding anyone any attention. 

“How did you know I had a pretty rough time here?” Ethan asked curiously. 

She smiled triumphantly. “Well, I saw all of your uncomfortable faces at the table when Aubrie was here. Tobias saw me and gave me an explanation to what was happening. I’m so sorry you had to go through that during your med school days.”

Ramsey gently stroked her smooth and delicate cheek. “It’s fine. Besides, I got an even better woman right here.” 

Tobias cleared her throat. “I’m sorry, but can you please just continue this later at home? I’m tryna drink some good wine here.”

Everyone snorted, but Ethan’s mind went back to the actual engagement ring he bought for her at their penthouse, stored inside one of his worn-out shoes. He was actually planning to propose to her tomorrow, on Christmas Day. 

Taking her to one of my favorite operas named Carmen, proposing to her there.

Oh, he can’t wait for this chaotic day to be over.

_______________________________________________________________

notes: if you’ve made it this far, thank you!

 tags:@missmiimiie @aylamwrites @starrystarrytrouble @udishaman @caseyvalentineramsey @queencarb @choicesstan1 @newcolonies @arcticrivers @angela8756 @takemyopenheart @rookie-ramsey @ohchoices @ohvamsey @ohramsey @natureblooms24 @drariellevalentine @maurine07 @lucy-268 @thanialis @drakewalkerfantasy​ 

@openheartfanfics​

@choicesficwriterscreations​

[thesinglesjukebox]

SELENA GOMEZ - LOSE YOU TO LOVE ME

[6.17]

We like it like a lose song, maybe...

Alex Clifton: I'm fascinated by songs where singers air their grievances and fans all know which specific people they are calling out. It's one of the reasons I fell in love with Taylor Swift's music way back in the day; I love a good gossip. Over the past eight years, I've worried about Selena with relation to Justin Bieber constantly. Not my relationship, I know, but he seemed like an immature asswipe when Selena could do much better. She's avoided discussing Bieber in much of her previous music. Even the songs that were definitely about him ("Love Will Remember," "The Heart Wants What It Wants") were written in abstract terms so you'd only really know the subject if you spent time following the Selena/Justin drama. Cut to "Lose You to Love Me," where she goes for the kill: "in two months you replaced us," a clear reference to Justin suddenly moving onto his now-wife Hailey. Such a vulnerable and specific track is a strong statement from Selena, who in the past two years has stayed relatively out of the public eye and is now ready to share parts of her story. There's no red scarf here, not that level of minutiae, but frankly she doesn't need it when much of her toxic and turbulent relationship with Bieber played out in the tabloids. And god it's so cathartic. It's an acknowledgement of hurt and anger but a phoenix move for Selena; she's rising from the debris stronger than before, and she wants you to know it. I'm so pleased for her. In the immortal words of her friend Taylor, "she lost him but she found herself and somehow that was everything." [8]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: A decade into her career as one of the world's most popular artists, it's worth noting that Selena Gomez's ascent to fame was improbable. She didn't have the most powerful voice, dance skills, or even a number one hit -- but especially early in her career, she was able to leverage her very public personal life to fuel interest in her music: a Disney fan base, a feud with Demi Lovato which the media loved to cover, membership in Taylor Swift's entourage, and, of course, most significantly, an infamous on-and-off-again relationship. But over the past four years, Selena has developed an effective signature vocal style -- hushed, controlled whispers which burst into moments of pop brilliance -- which makes it clear that her music is more than capable of standing on her own. So it's all the more frustrating then, that after seeing how stellar her music can be removed from celebrity context, that the first song we get off her long awaited third solo album is yet another song about Justin Bieber. But while I initially rejected "Lose You to Love Me" as a regression into formulaic pop balladry, there's a surprising amount of depth. The song sounds like genuine healing, coming from an artist singing her truth. Her voice is soft but powerful, emotive but not overwrought, reflective but not nostalgic. A line like "now the chapter is closed and done" could land cliché and hollow, but Selena sings it like someone who finally took a breath of fresh air for the first time in years. This is all to say: if we have to listen to this one last song about Justin Bieber, at least it's the first genuinely compelling one, and a step in seeing her evolution as an artist and celebrity. [7]

Leah Isobel: When Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake broke up, he got to project his messy breakup feelings outward; he produced imagery about spying on her doppelganger and fantasizing about her death. But for Selena -- Timberlake's 2010s tabloid counterpart -- unrepentant sleaze is a much riskier proposition, at least on the charts. Instead, she sublimates her anger, returning to the baby-voiced Julia Michaels wheelhouse. The mass of vocal effects on the chorus is surprisingly effective, but for an artist who was briefly one of the more progressive voices on Top 40 radio, this defanged "Everytime" is a little disappointing. [4]

Katherine St Asaph: Piano ballads are to music what Joseph Campbell is to narratives. Not a song but a beat on a storyboard -- barely a storyboard, even, but tabloid kerfuffle. [1]

Michael Hong: Selena Gomez's career has long mirrored Demi Lovato's, from child acting stints on Barney & Friends to the release of their fifth studio albums within a week of each other in 2015. Here she goes for something similar to Lovato's "Sober," released last year as a sort of song-as-a-statement -- though Gomez's statement is more uplifting than heartbreaking. "Sober" was a rare instance where Lovato never pushed her voice too far, with its statement made more effective by the events that followed; her confession came across as authentically personal as it unfolded in real-time. "Lose You to Love Me," like "Sober," is stripped down to its bare bones for a more intimate feeling, but here, it's questionable whether the quiet dynamic is one of Gomez's stylistic choices or a symptom of her limited vocal range. There are interesting touches, like the echo-chamber effect on her voice for the line "in two months, you replaced us," which makes the following lines about being broken all the more devastating. But there are also moments like the choir vocals on the final chorus that are predictably overwrought. While "Lose You to Love Me" is a delicately gorgeous and uplifting track, its statement is diminished by how tiresome the Gomez-Bieber narrative feels. We're no longer watching her relationship end in the present, but instead seeing Selena Gomez finally claim closure on a relationship that has long since run its course (at least in the public eye). More interesting is the single released the following day, which features the offbeat personality she's carved out for herself over the past few years and is equally effective at demonstrating that Selena Gomez has moved on. [6]

Alfred Soto: In a tradition of self-reflexive love songs, she tells us she'll sing the chorus off-key (it sounds okay to me). Maybe this line represents one of Selena Gomez's contributions. If I see Julia Michaels, I think of phony uplift, of which the chorus has hints. Then Gomez counters with a slightly hoarse, un-melodramatic dropping of the line, "You promised the world and I fell for it. A performance with grandness in its bones, and it almost succeeds. [6]

Stephen Eisermann: I'm a sucker for big, cathartic choruses, but the verses really let me down here. Between Selena's weird vocal, the melodramatic strings, and the unintentionally funny lyrics (I'm not convinced that the whole singing off-key line isn't a bit that she's delivering with a wink), it's really hard to take the track seriously. But when that big booming chorus hits, backing vocals and all, you can almost feel Selena letting go of everything Bieber did to her. And that, that's lovely. It's also why the other track released after this is so much better. [5]

Joshua Copperman: A song that's perfectly in tune with 2019-type sad music yet unafraid to be huge. It doesn't have the stakes of "Praying" or the bounce of "It Ain't Me," but that's not a problem. The gang vocals that plagued so much of mid-to-late 2010s pop -- including Selena Gomez's own music -- blossom into a full choir, beautifully contrasting with her usual hushiness. It should be Real Music-y --even the lyrics are less playful and twee than Michaels and Tranter usually go, barring the "killing me softly" shoehorn and obvious title -- but because of how thin Gomez's voice sounds, it's not. (The most Michaels-y touch is the backing vocals going "to love, to love" instead of "to love me, love me" like I'd thought, as in "I needed to lose you to love again at all.") The pop most beloved non-mainstream artists are producing is proudly campy, and that's great! Gomez seems to be headed in that direction too with "Look at Her Now," but this unexpected pivot to pathos inexplicably works thanks to the strategic arrangement and lyricism. [9]

Kayla Beardslee: It's fascinatingly difficult to determine where Julia Michaels' style ends and Selena Gomez's begins, and the whispered melodies and "Issues" violins here don't help. Although Gomez's voice can sometimes be aggressively pleasant, she digs in enough to communicate real emotion here, and the choir backing vocals are surprisingly powerful. The song makes a poignant, if heavy-handed, statement about maturing and finding your identity, amplified by this being her comeback single: Ariana has "thank u, next," Miley has "Slide Away," and now Selena has "Lose You to Love Me." [7]

Jackie Powell: While Julia Michaels has commented that Selena Gomez is indeed a songwriter, I still don't believe that's the proper term to describe her contributions to music. Gomez is a storyteller first and foremost. That's the term: storyteller. Sometimes those can be interpreted as synonymous or givens of each other, but let's remember that Gomez has been telling stories since she was seven years old. Her art is most successful when she's in control of her narrative and knows exactly what story she's about to tell. When she has the opportunity to perform her stories, she goes all out and sells it exactly as someone who's been on stage since childhood can. That may sound like something Ariana Grande has done in the past year or so with "thank u, next," since both "Lose You to Love Me" and that highlight some of the most dramatic breakups in pop culture. But as Tatiana Cirisano pointed out for Billboard, Gomez's approach is the contrapositive to Grande's. Both cuts are relatable and have a commitment to empowerment and autonomy, but Gomez makes her track a moment without a teen movie pastiche. Her choice to emphasize and crescendo on the lyrics "In two months you replaced us" and "Made me think I deserved it" speak loudly. This track is all about its dynamics in its minimalistic glory. Imagine Gomez was performing a monologue. That's the type of choice a storyteller makes. Justin Tranter and Michaels provide the melody and the nuts and bolts, but the concept is clearly all Gomez. The backing vocals in each chorus from Tranter and Michaels are symbolic of what they've meant to Gomez over the years. They've been by her side every step of the way and have lifted her up. That's beautiful. What's also beautiful is if I ever wanted to learn more about Justin Bieber, the lyrics "Sang off-key in my chorus / 'Cause it wasn't yours" tell me all I need to know. [8]

Josh Buck: The Selena Gomez x Julia Michaels joints never miss. [6]

Abdullah Siddiqui: Selena Gomez's discography in the last four years has largely consisted of stylistic meandering and incomplete ideas. She hasn't quite been able to settle on a sound or a narrative. This feels like she's starting from scratch. It's a pretty solid place to start. [7]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[earwaxinggibbous]

Top 10 Best Hit Songs of 2018

As I geared up to make the list of hits for 2018, I was prepared for difficulty, and I wasn’t wrong. Hence why there are a few little cheats here and there. Really anything that even had the potential to be a hit got on this list because the Hot 100 was fucking barren and I figure I’d rather give some exposure to some good artists that didn’t get what they deserved.

I do discuss alcohol/drug use briefly in my number 9 + 6 and abuse in my number 4. Let’s get this shit on the road.

10. Mine - Bazzi

This song is dumb. And I love it.

Mine by Bazzi, who no doubt will not show up on the charts next year, is a song that all of you know even if you think you don’t, because it’s the one with the memes.

You so! Fuckin! Precious! When you! Smiiiiile!

Yeah, it’s that one.

There’s not much to say about this one. It’s a quick and easy listen at only a little over 2 minutes. Bazzi has a nice enough voice, and the production manages to stand on its own. Honestly the reason it’s here is because the lyrics are adorable.

It feels very teenage, but not in the obnoxious way that Lucid Dreams is. It’s just very innocent despite the second line being about hitting it from the back. It’s a kind of innocence I can enjoy mostly unironically.

Like, whatever man. Just enjoy life.

9. Betrayed - Lil Xan

So I wasn’t actually sure when this song charted. I believe it was either late 2017 or early 2018, possibly with some crossover, but I’m counting it because I love this song so much.

Betrayed actually shares a lot of similarities with Juice WRLD’s Lucid Dreams. They were both towards the bottom on each respective list, they both have videos made by Cole Bennet, and they both have a sneaky anti-drug message.

Ironic considering his name is Lil Xan. Also I lied it’s not very sneaky at all. Which is good, if you’re gonna be anti-drug then just fucking do it. The beat is chill, the bars are chill, it’s all super chill. That’s probably in part due to the fact that Lil Xan has a super calming voice. This is weed music. Like Car Seat Headrest. And good weed music can be enjoyed when you’re sober, which Betrayed can be because it just sounds nice.

A good chunk of Betrayed is about the pitfalls of the rap game, and how suddenly everyone turns on you and wants your money, which is kind of neurotic but not entirely inaccurate.

This was actually the plot of a Jay-Z and Justin Timberlake song called Holy Grail from a few years back. And I hate to say it but this song does it way better, because it’s not trying to make fame out to be some horrible demon priestess who’s sucking your soul out of your ass, but rather, more of a lifestyle with very different complications.

Which is what it is.

So Jay-Z got outdone by a 12-year-old with face tats named Lil Xan, and if I heard about that my ego would be deeply, deeply bruised.

The only reason it isn’t higher is because, uh.

Oof, Lil Xan. Come on now.

8. King’s Dead - Jay Rock ft. Kendrick Lamar, Future and James Blake

So a lot of people actually didn’t like this song. Which... I kind of get.

Also apparently this was on the Black Panther soundtrack. I never saw that movie, but a lot of the lyrics on this, at least according to lyric genius, relate to that movie. Which I guess is why I have no clue what it’s about other than the average rap music cliches. The only thing I knew about King’s Dead for god knows how long was this gif of Kendrick eating corn in a palm tree.

I feel like the best argument against this song (other than Future’s high-pitched sampling of Slob On My Knob that made me lose my shit) is that there’s nothing really special about it. I mean yeah, Kendrick has a voice that’s smooth like butter, but King’s Dead has a generic beat and bars that just don’t stand out.

But I don’t know. I just love it.

This is just a nice fun song to chill out to. I can put it on, throw myself into bed, and let the cares of the day shloff off of my body as Kendrick whispers to me in the language of the ancient ones. This is nowhere near his best work, not even remotely close to it. All it is is nice and small and easy to listen to without being completely boring.

Maybe I also just like it because it’s been forever since a rap song really sounded like one. This is partially the fault of Future, who is on this song, and doing the same shit he usually does, but at least the rest of the song sounds like words. It feels like it’s been a whole decade since rap music wasn’t just an autotuned jumble, and while I’m easier on mumble-rap than most, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss good old fashioned regular rap.

Regardless of whether it’s blind nostalgia or some level of actual quality, I enjoy King’s Dead for what it is. It may just be a rock and not a diamond, but it’s my rock and I love it.

7. In My Blood - Shawn Mendes

So like, what the fuck happened with Shawn Mendes? He just kind of got really good all of a sudden. Like when every genre, every artist, every newcomer and every single is shitting the bed, it’s Shawn Mendes of all people to bring it home. That’s like if Charlie Puth turned out to be the savior of music. It’s like if Chingy developed into a rap legend. And this song, In My Blood, is about something we all wanna do! Giving up.

Okay, so that’s not exactly what it’s about. It’s about the feeling of wanting to give up, but refusing to, in a very chronological way. With the verses representing the low points and the chorus representing the swell of energy that forces one to get back on their feet. It’s an incredibly well put-together song where Shawn’s voice is actually put to good use instead of him gargling pus like he did on Treat You Better. I’d be lying if I said he didn’t emote wonderfully on this.

I haven’t heard any of the other singles he’s released around this song, but I’m definitely interested in doing so because In My Blood is an experience, kind of in the same way that like, a really good Panic! at the Disco song is. It just punches you repeatedly. You ever been punched by a song? It feels great. I wish more songs would punch me.

In a lot of ways In My Blood is also nostalgic for me, since it brings me back to an era where I actually got excited about pop music because it was important to me some-fucking-how. And I don’t mean like, I was interested in pop like I am right now. When I was littler my parents basically raised me on old alternative music and jazz, and while I definitely enjoyed it I had literally no idea what other kids at school listened to. The first pop song I remember hearing was Pokerface by Lady GaGa, I was on the school bus, and it sounded like nothing I’d ever heard before. Over time my sister began playing the radio so that her friends at her new school would stop goofing on her for not knowing any pop artists, and hearing all this new music was kind of an experience. Of course after awhile we both moved into individualized tastes and neither of us really listen to the radio unless it’s during the holidays, but hearing In My Blood somehow reminds me of a time when being a hit actually meant something.

It’s a song where you put it on and it just owns the room despite its minimalism, and with tons of easy listening alt-crap hitting the stations nowadays, it’s nice, albeit surreal, to know that Shawn Mendes is the one who gives a shit.

6. Genius - LSD

In case you didn’t know, LSD is the combined efforts of rapper Labrinth, singer Sia and producer Diplo. I hadn’t actually heard of this group until pretty recently, and I wish I had because if you know me, you know about my wretched obsession with Sia. Maybe I’m too forgiving, but I can’t remember a single bad track she’s put out. And Genius is no exception.

Lyrically this song’s a bit lacking, despite the title. But soundwise it sticks like gum, with a layered production. I always say that they should have Sia work with one of these sing-rappers, so having it finally happen is proof that god might be listening to me.

It’s like bubblegum for your brain, it’s sweet, it tastes good, it’s fun and it sticks. Even after only one listen I couldn’t get the tune out of my head. And god knows I just want the charts to be fun for once. No, I don’t think this song charted, which is an absolute shame. LSD should absolutely have the star power to hit the top 100, but I guess this just wasn’t a good year for them.

Regardless, I have heard that LSD plans to do a full project, and after listening to the rest of their short album I am more than excited. The only reason this isn’t higher up is that, judging by the group name I was expecting it to be way more of an acid trip soundwise. It’s definitely hard to compare LSD’s Genius to any other type of pop in recent years, but I feel like that’s moreso because Diplo and company have taken all sorts of elements from all sorts of pop music and sneakily fused them together.

Regardless, Genius is a highly enjoyable listen. Sia’s at top performance as per usual, Labrinth sounds really nice beside her and Diplo’s production is solid. Also I seriously recommend the music video. It’s super weird. I wish animated music videos were more common with pop, to be honest.

5. Better Now - Post Malone

I almost feel like I’ve sinned putting a Post Malone song above a Kendrick Lamar song, but god do I love Better Now.

The Post Malone conversation is still very much underway, with a lot of people saying they hated Psycho because it was boring (which I can get even though I don’t agree) and that they hated Jackie Chan because it was just really really stupid. But, much like Candy Paint, I have yet to hear anyone say they dislike Better Now. And I do honestly believe that he hit it out of the park on this one.

This one’s sort of the reverse of Genius. It has pretty basic trap production, but really nice lyrics. Possibly building on the story from I Fall Apart, though with a slightly more mature outlook, Post talks about an ex-girlfriend who he misses, trying to drown his feelings in alcohol, drugs and expensive stuff in the wake of the relationship.

A total bummer, but Post sells it pretty well.

Like damn. That’s a detail right there.

I mean, I could argue that nobody has a specific drawer for socks they don’t like, but who cares really.

Anyway, unlike I Fall Apart, which was a turn-off for a lot of people because it felt spiteful and juvenile, Better Now doesn’t really place the blame on Post or his ex, which is a much more realistic scenario. Because really, his ex isn’t at fault for no longer being in love with him, but Post isn’t at fault for pining. He’s only human. Judging by the lyrics, the story is that Post was dumped for being a druggie in this song.

Though Lyric Genius also argues this is a reference to the death of Lil Peep, who was close personal friends with Post Malone in real life. If this song is somehow in a weird roundabout way an ode to Lil Peep, honestly it does feel like it’s a good send-up to him from another rapper. Like yeah, a love song might seem weird as a tribute to a dead friend, but it definitely does feel like a mournful, sad song about longing for a close person who’s gone for the long run.

Whether this is a tribute to Lil Peep or just a breakup song, it definitely carries the weight of the emotions, partly since Post just generally sounds sad all the time. And in a year full of pissy break-up songs, this is the one that hits home more than any other for me. If Post is going off of past experience, it shows, and if he isn’t he’s just a really good actor I guess.

4. Freaky Friday - Lil Dicky ft. Chris Brown

This song is the bane of my fucking existence.

Why do I laugh at this? Why do I laugh at jokes about Lil Dicky having a small penis still? Why am I losing my shit at the idea that a white guy in a black guy’s body would immediately wonder if he can say the n-word? Why am I, a grown man with presumably mature tastes, going ‘hee hee hoo hoo’ over the phrase “I’m DJ Khaled! Why am I yelling?” And why the fuck, in the year 2018, am I actively enjoying a Chris Brown song?

Lil Dicky I have a soft spot for. We’re both Jews, we’re both stupid, we both look dead inside in every photograph taken of us. We’re basically like long lost twin brothers. Plus I do think he’s a skilled rapper, with his greatest track easily being Professional Rapper featuring Snoop Dogg, and if it had been my choice, that song would’ve been his first big hit. But no, it had to be Freaky Friday. A song that, for all accounts and purposes, is about as funny as an early Your Favorite Martian song, and yet still makes me roll into a screaming fit laughing my ass off.

I’m not gonna sit here and pretend I’m over the Chris Brown drama just because there’s plenty of worse artists charting right now. Forgetting it would be an offense to everyone involved. Do I think he’s probably matured since? Maybe. But that doesn’t excuse or explain away what he did. But for me to pretend I don’t enjoy this song would be disingenuous, and it breaks my heart to actually enjoy a Chris Brown song. In 20-fucking-18.

Everyone hates this song. And they’re valid, honestly. I just like the chorus, maybe? I don’t know. It’s hardly Lil Dicky’s best work, but fuck me. Of course I had to be the one suffering with the curse of enjoying Lil Dicky’s Freaky Friday to the point that I put it above a ton of songs that are probably objectively better, all because I laugh at dick jokes and love a catchy chorus.

But I will give it credit, this is the first popular comedy song in a long time I’ve been able to get down to. Selfie and What Does The Fox Say made me wanna scoop my eyes out with a melon baller, but of course the fucking Chris Brown comedy song makes me shriek in body-wracking laughter as if I’ve never heard a joke before.

It’s been at LEAST a year since I felt this shitty for enjoying a song, but that’s life I guess. Just enjoying bad music by bad people for bad reasons.

3. High Hopes - Panic! at the Disco

How is it that we’re having a Panic! at the Disco hit in 2018? Whatever, I’m not mad.

I mean, come on. A swelling Brendon Urie anthem about finally being able to achieve your dreams and shit? That’s really all I need on a bad day, isn’t it. Thanks 2018.

I don’t even remember if this song has good production or not. It’s really loud. Everything is loud. Do you think I care if it sounds good? I mean, Brendon sounds good, but like. Biz Markie’s Just A Friend fills me with emotion and it sounds like it’s being sung by a donkey. My standards are not high. Maybe I’d need higher standards to not like this song.

Frankly, I don’t care if the production is bad. Because this song is just good mood music, and I like that it’s loud. I want Brendon to scream in my ear about having high hopes. Do you think I care how it sounds?

No but really. It’s a perfectly well-built song, Brendon performs well on it. Bless this shit though. If there’s anything that represents hope in my mind, it’s Brendon Urie skittering up the side of a building while singing about having high hopes and his mama and whatever whatever. In a year full of dour break-up songs and people dying and abusers getting famous, all you can really have is high hopes. And that’s all there is to it.

2. Neva Lavd Yah! - Dusty Ray Bottoms

Can we all agree RuPaul’s Drag Race is kind of a hack show at this point? I mean, Season 10 was a disaster and so far AS4 has been a disaster too. I’m not even sure why I still watch it at this point.

Anyway, this is kind of a cheat. Neva Lavd Yah! charted on Billboard LGBT, and actually charted pretty high. Not the actual Hot 100, but do you think I care anymore?

So we’re all mad that rock music is dead, and that the only remnants we have of it is Imagine Dragons and other similar garbage. But don’t fret (unless it’s on a guitar) because Dusty Ray Bottoms, queen of my heart, is here to solve that problem. Full electric guitar and drums. No autotune. Just pure Dusty Ray on the track here to kick ass.

I guess Neva Lavd Yah! is a generic “fuck the haters” anthem, but for once I actually believe it. Maybe it’s because it’s being sung by a 50-foot-tall gay man with dots all over his face. Maybe it’s just because, with every drag queen doing techno music, Dusty Ray has done something completely different. God knows I was sick of every drag queen doing overproduced electronica about nothing at all.

Neva Lavd Yah! isn’t polished or clean. It’s screaming and loud and full of passion. Sometimes you’re just a 50-foot gay who wants to yell, sometimes you’re a 5-foot gay who wants to yell. Maybe you don’t feel like yelling right now, but you’ve probably been in that mood before. Neva Lavd Yah! is for when you wanna chill in a garage with an electric guitar and write songs and then scream with your shitty garage band and it’s the 90′s and you’re gay.

Damn right.

And before we move forward,

let’s hit those honorable mentions.

I Like It - Cardi B ft. Bad Bunny and J Balvin

This song really did almost get on the list, and I mean it was like a baby dick’s length away. I almost feel bad that I let Mine on instead. Cardi I am so sorry.

Nice For What - Drake

This was the only good song Drake released this year, and while Drake talking about “strong women” on the same album as I’m Upset seems like bullshit, I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t at least kind of a banger.

Now or Never - Blair St. Clair

This was the only other big drag queen hit I remember this year. It was released in the wake of Blair St. Clair coming out about a sexual assault, and while I do think it’s an empowering song, I don’t like the way it sounds that much.

Pray For Me - The Weeknd ft. Kendrick Lamar

How I liked King’s Dead more than this I can’t even explain to you. The beat on Pray For Me rocks my tight ass though. Plus let’s be honest, The Weeknd and Kendrick are a fucking dream team.

I Love It - Kanye West ft. Lil Pump

I can’t hate this. Fucking look at it. They’re in roblox costumes!

Famous Prophets (Stars) - Car Seat Headrest

Not a hit, which is the only thing that kept it off of here. Consider Song of the Summer by Remo Drive, Humanity by Gorillaz and When You Die by MGMT also in this spot.

On to number one, and if you know me you probably know it already.

1. Kamikaze - Eminem

Listen. I don’t care if this didn’t chart. I don’t care if it didn’t get close. I don’t give two fifths of a fuck if Eminem isn’t as good as he used to be. I don’t give a single rat’s ass.

Because I fucking love Kamikaze.

(The song.)

The album was fine, I wasn’t huge on the whole “call out everyone” angle it took. Sure sometimes it landed, but other times, like with the Tyler the Creator diss, it was completely pointless and kind of petty.

But the title song? It bangs.

The lyrics are good, obviously, it’s an Eminem song and he hasn’t been struggling with lyrics since... Revival I guess. The production on Kamikaze is interesting, the chorus is catchy. I just love it. It puts me in a good mood for reasons I cannot explain using words of the English language.

Maybe I just love Eminem too much. But in a year of stolid depression like 2018, all I wanted was for my favorite rapper Eminem to say “fuck” and yell a lot and just be kind of motivational in his weird way. And he did it. And I understand if people don’t enjoy Kamikaze (the song or the album) but I just can’t not love it, it makes me so excited every time I hear that intro. I feel like a child almost.

I saw Eminem live for the first time this year at Governor’s Ball. It was an experience. My feet were killing me because to get good spots, my sister and I had to sit through Chvrches. (Didn’t like them very much.) It was loud and crowded. It started raining, I was cold as shit and tired and this enormous drunk guy in a wifebeater nearly elbowed my head clean off of my shoulders just due to a lack of spacial awareness. And I didn’t even give a shit until it was over.

The music ended, and I realized I was freezing my ass off. And that’s what good music does to a guy I guess. And being able to download a new, really good Eminem song was like capturing that moment in a bottle. A bottle of white boy spite, but a good bottle nonetheless.

Of course I’m biased. God knows if this song is actually better than something like In My Blood or Genius, but I love this song too much to put it any lower than number one.

Whenever I need motivation or I’m just really pissed, this song is here for me to listen to, so I can lose my shit by the side of a man who I’ve literally begun referring to as my dad at this point. And that’s just what I want. A song that I can feel next to. A song that can feel with me. And as good as some of these other songs are, I don’t feel with them like I do with Kamikaze.

See you next year, I guess.

[safyresky]

Fusion AU Part I: The History

Part I: The History | Part II: When Elle Met Berline | Part III: The Bernelle Bit | Part IV: The Triumphant Return of Jackie Frost

I finally sat down and decided to begin writing this 3 4 part AU series! Part 1 establishes the history of fusion in the Crystal Springs universe, and lays the groundwork for Fusion AU Part II >:D. It starts with history, briefly goes through the pre-CS timeline (including the Ultimate Jackie Frost), and ends with Berline, which is about everything I need to establish before starting the second part. I hope you all enjoy it!! I’ve been enjoying it immensely ;)

Fusion.

It was whispered of outside of the fae community; a special magic that only the fae could perform. When two or more fae combined their forms to create an even bigger fae.

That’s how the other magical folk saw it, of course; the fae themselves however had a very different view of it, being the ones who could fuse.

And each fraction of the fae had very differing views to fusion, of course.

Faeries were of the mind that fusion was above them; they would only fuse with other faeries and refused to even fathom the thought of fusing with their cousins. They turned their noses up to it.

Pixies were neutral. Yes, they could fuse. Sure, they would fuse if they felt like it or felt the need to arise--the latter of which happened very rarely, according to history. A history the Pixies were eventually lost to.

The original Elves viewed fusion as a tactic in battle; a very important tactic used to strengthen themselves in battle. Outside of battle, they very rarely fused, though it was not frowned upon. When the Warrior Elves changed their society and their descendants became the Christmas Elves, “a very important tactic” became “something we do if there is an emergency” which, considering Christmas, happened incredibly rarely. Dangerous errands happened once every so often and normally, Santa’s Head Elf could handle it just fine on his own, thank you very much.

Last of the fae we have the Sprites. The Sprites have always been the odd fae out; powerful in their own right, they have one downfall: Sprites are incredibly sensitive to emotions. Naturally with this disposition, Sprites shared the view amongst themselves that fusion was something special. It was the physical manifestation of the bond between two or more Sprites and thus, Sprites were always fairly relaxed about it, some choosing to stay fused permanently.

The differing views on fusion amongst the fae perhaps had something to do with what came to be known as the Fae War. A War that went too far, resulting in the extinction of the pixies, the change in Elven society, and what is known now as The Call--the call that ended the war. All of the fae involved in the war were removed to Rosehaven, a different plane which would house the magical folk who later would choose to retire or be injured enough to result in a “death”. This was mostly composed of Sprites, with a few fae scattered here and there and may be where the Warrior Elves disappeared to as well, though to this day it’s unknown.

The Call came and went. And Fusion became something of myth; of lore.

Or so it was thought. Years after The Call, decades after Mother Nature found the Seasons and brought them together, she found out in quite an interesting way that these new sprites were still very capable of fusion.

She didn’t think she would have to talk to the girls about fusion, but when she walked into the main garden one evening she was met with two adult-sized sprites fighting right in front of her.

“What is going on here?” she demanded, in a voice she hoped would snap the two fusions in front of her out of their fight.

Sure enough, they both turned around and stared at her. Judging by the looks, Mother Nature assumed that Spring and Summer had fused and were having it out with a fusion that must have been Winter and Autumn.

“Spring and Summer started making fun of us for being colder!” Winter and Autumn shouted. Wintumn? No, Autumnter. It sounded better to Mother Nature. 

“They’ve been encroaching on our territory!” Spring and Summer said. Spummer? Sprimmer? Mother Nature couldn’t figure out their name. Perhaps they wouldn’t mind the name Sunny; that seemed to encompass their fusion well enough--she was very tall and very, very warm.

“The four of you know full well that the Centre of the Garden is neutral territory, for starters. There should be no fighting here, especially not fighting using fusion! What are you four, elves?”

“Evles?” Sunny asked.

“Fusion?” Autumnter said. “Is that what this is?”

“Yes.”

“But that’s just a story,” Autumn’s voice said.

“We fused?” Winter’s voice said, confused.

A bright light, and suddenly Autumn and Winter sat on the floor, looking at each other in awe.

“Wait, what?” Sunny shouted. She backed up a step, disappearing in an even brighter light and leaving Spring and Summer standing beside each other, equally as in awe.

“It looks like I’ll have to have the fusion talk with the four of you today. I never thought this would happen,” she mumbled the last bit to herself. “Come on girls, let’s have lunch, a lesson, and then resolve this territory issue.

Mother Nature’s fusion talk proved to teach the Seasons something very, very important. After that day, the girls respected each other a lot more, and not once fused to fight with each other.

Though nowadays, she often saw all six of their fusions at any time. War had once again befallen Crystal Springs; a Civil War, between the two twin heirs to the throne.

Pyros had grown into believing that he was the one who would rule; but his nature was unfortunately evil. Once Mother Nature would have said it was perhaps a bit aggressive, but this war that had stretched on for nearly one thousand years now and Pyros had started it.

Blaise, of course, hadn’t thought it would happen until it happened. And even then, he still tried to talk to his brother; to reason with him.

But Pyros was beyond reasoning now. The Millennium War had stretched on and now Mother Nature was very, very angry. She loved seeing her daughters fused with each other, getting along--it’s exactly what Mother Gaia had intended when she exhumed the old system of balance and prepared this new one for Mother Nature to head. She did not like seeing them fused and forced to fight a War that had gone on for too long.

And when Pyros captured the four of them, it had been the last straw.

She felt no remorse for what was happening to Pyros now. She stood silently with the bulk of Blaise’s army, watching as what Mother Nature could only assume was the fusion of Blaise and Winter froze him solid.

The War ended, the years passed, and Blaise and Winter appeared to be spending a lot of time together. It wasn’t uncommon to see whom the girls began to call Blinter sitting in the garden, silently smiling. 

It was hard to believe that this was the same fusion that had ended Pyros’ war so mercilessly. 

And it did Mother Nature’s heart good to see two sprites fused they way fusion was suppose to be. Not to fight, but to be together. 

It was good. They were good.

To nobody’s surprise, Blaise and Winter got married and Mother Nature saw one of her children leave the sort of proverbial nest. It was bittersweet; she was happy to see them happy, happy to see Winter thawed again, a merry blush on her face as she and Blaise had danced together the night of their wedding. She was also very sad to see one of her children move out. Mother Nature never would have expected that to happen. (It did prepare her for when her other daughters decided to move out, though).

Blaise and Winter lived together happily, eventually having a child. They named him Jack, and Winter was pleased to learn that he took after her own elemental alignment; Blaise’s pride was only a little wounded.

They didn’t fuse much once Jack was born. He proved to be quite the handful growing up. It wasn’t long before he entered his late thousands and both Blaise and Winter noticed that he had a bit of a concerning bad streak going. It didn’t stop them from being proud when he became Legendary, and secured a seat for himself on the Council of Legendary Figures.

But it was concerning.

Both recalled a curse Pyros had uttered as the two of them, as Blinter, had defeated him finally. Blaise chalked it up to a coincidence; Winter was sure it was coming true but tried not to show it.

Things were tense; but then, along came Jacqueline. Jack had been so shocked to have a younger sibling that his bad streak had frozen (pun intended) for the time being. He made sure to always be there for his sister, proclaiming loudly to his parents that he would gladly take her under his wing and teach her everything he knew, power wise.

“If she takes after you and your Mother,” Blaise had said.

“Hmm,” Winter said, a small smile on her face because she could feel it--Jacqueline was a winter sprite as well.

She was right, of course; Blaise’s pride was once again only a little wounded.

Jacqueline was a handful herself, but not in the same way her brother had been. She was always giggles and running about. It wouldn’t have been a normal day if one of the three Frosts hadn’t tripped over her once or twice. 

When she was about two hundred or so, Winter decided it was time to teach Jacqueline how to use her powers properly when she walked into the house one day and found the foyer frozen solid, with a giggly Jacqueline sliding around on her belly and Blaise’s feet frozen in place as he tried to gently thaw the ice around him.

Jack was ecstatic when he returned home later that day to hear Winter’s decision (and have a temporary ice rink in the front of the house). He immediately began teaching Jacqueline and both parents were pleased with how it was going. Jack proved to be a good mentor and Jacqueline seemed to be doing wonders to Jack’s bad streak.

It wasn’t long before Jacqueline was making flurries all over the yard; she was progressing fast and Jack was very excited. It was nice to have someone show him appreciation and believe in him. Every time Jacqueline said he was a good teacher, he grinned. More so when his parents expressed their joy at it too. 

One evening, Jack was showing Jacqueline how to make icicles. And that’s when it happened.

“Look Jacqueline, it’s very easy. Watch me closely this time, okay?”

Jacqueline nodded, staring intently at Jack’s hands. She took note of every movement he made, and watched how he formed the icicle.

“Okay! I got it this time!” she said. Looking down at her hands, she willed the icicle to appear, and grinned as her hands turned blue. The tube of ice formed and Jacqueline carefully grabbed it with her free hand. She screamed. “I did it!” she said, showing Jack the very small icicle.

“You did! You did it!” Jack said, also excited. Jacqueline danced around laughing throwing her very tiny (and fairly dull) icicles around the backyard. Jack laughed as well, picking up his sister and swinging her around, both of them laughing when suddenly, they were gone.

“What?” Jack said. “Jacqueline! where are you?” 

“Where are you?” Jacqueline asked, fearful.

“Where are we?” A new voice said. They looked down at their hands. And their feet. They stood up. “What?”

A part of this new person waved their hand, a piece of reflective ice appearing in front of them. Carefully, they crawled towards it, peaking at the mirror.

One face looked back, with crazy hair, four eyes, and a much smaller nose than usual. Or bigger? I guess that depends on which part of me is looking, they thought.

“Jack, Jacqueline? Everything alright out here--oh my.” 

“Mom! What happened to us?”

Winter stood on the porch, looking up at what she presumed was the fusion of her two children. “I believe you two have fused.”

“Fused? Like in the stories Dad tells?”

Winter put a finger in front of her lips, staring at her kids. Or rather, kid, currently.

“But that doesn’t make sense,” they said. “Fusion is a story, it’s lore. Isn’t it?”

“Not quite. What’s your name?”

“Jackie Frost,” the fusion replied right away. Then they grinned. “The ultimate Jackie Frost!” they started laughing, then briefly stopped. “How do I know that?”

“When you fuse with someone, you become a new person. And that new person usually knows their name. Usually. Hmm,” Winter said, watching as Jackie Frost laughed and began running around. “I think it’s time I had a talk with you. Let’s have some cocoa, dear,” Winter said, walking inside.

The Ultimate Jackie Frost laughed again, rushing inside behind their Mother.

Jackie Frost stuck around for a few days. They were more or less harmless, though the backyard appeared to be semi-permanently covered in a few feet of snow. They spent most of the time jumping in the snow piles and running around, occasionally stopping to learn something new.

Three days later Jack walked in, carrying a passed out and snoring Jacqueline.

“She passed out while fused. That was...an experience. Have you seen my shoes Mom? I was wearing some before Jackie appeared.”

They didn’t find the shoes until the snow melted in the Spring.

It wasn’t odd to see Jackie Frost bouncing around the backyard for the next century. But they began to appear less and less as the century went on.

When asked why Jackie wasn’t around as much, Jack shrugged. “I dunno,” he’d say. Then disappear for days on end.

When asked the same question, Jacqueline, now in her 400s, looked sad. “I don’t like hearing Jack’s thoughts,” she would simply say.

The Legate Law was passed, and Jacqueline became an official Legate to Legendary Figure Jack Frost.

That was the last time Blaise and Winter saw Jackie Frost.

Twenty-six years later, Jack left the family, leaving his parents injured, the continent trapped in an endless ice storm, and his sister bleeding at the front gate.

Jackie Frost was never seen again.

And Jacqueline never used icicles again.

Sometime in the 17th century, Bernard found himself sneaking through a hunting lodge on the hunt for something very, very important for Santa.

This Santa’s younger brother had taken possession of the deed to the house that Santa’s wife and children lived in. He was holding it over Santa’s head, using it to attempt to get him to step down. So Santa had sent Bernard out to Clifton Manor to retrieve the deed.

“How will that stop your brother, Santa?” Bernard had asked. “Wouldn’t it be better to just bring your family here?”

“They don’t like living here permanently Bernard, and I would much rather they be happy, even if it means they are not with me all the time.”

“Right,” Bernard had said, disagreeing still. How could someone not be happy in Elfsburg? The place was constantly cheerful.

Nonetheless, Bernard had agreed to go and find the deed. While there, Bernard had also decided to find as much proof as he could to prove to the authorities that James Clifton was endangering the family. Santa may be happy with just the deed, but Bernard wouldn’t be happy until he knew that this jerk was behind bars.

So he had done his research and tracked the guy to a hunting lodge he called Clifton Manor, seeing as how he was now the person who held all of the estates of the Clifton family.

Bernard had hoped this would be smooth sailing but when he poofed in and began looking around, he realized that the wall guns were, in fact, fully functioning muskets and he was very, very concerned.

Thankfully for the time, James Clifton seemed to be occupied in a parlour with a group of men. This left the office free for him to pick through for a decent amount of time, he guessed.

As long as he remained quiet.

A sudden chill engulfed him and he shivered as Jacqueline Frost appeared at his side, looking incredibly angry.

“Bernard, holy frost,” she almost shouted. “He did that!”

“Shh!”

“Oh, sorry,” the sprite whispered. “Where are we?”

“We’re in a hunting lodge. Santa’s brother has taken the deed to his family’s house and is threatening his wife and kids with it. I need to find it and bring it back to Santa.”

“Okay, so why are we quiet? Place looks pretty deserted to me.”

“The walls are full of functional rifles and a group of men who I presume know how to use those rifles are two rooms away and we are trespassing.”

“Right, quiet it is then,” Jacqueline said, still steamed.

“Look, I don’t mind the company really. Especially since it’s been a while since I’ve seen you. If you can keep it down, I’ll gladly listen to what’s got your snow in a drift. Can you promise me you’ll keep it down?”

Jacqueline nodded. “Absolutely.”

“Good. Now who did what?”

“Jack! He did that!”

“You’ll have to be more specific, Jacqueline.”

“He left us, Bernard. And he stabbed me! And I don’t even know if it was intentional or not!!”

“Okay,” Bernard said, quietly pulling out the chair and sitting in the desk. “I think you may have to be a bit more specific, kid.”

Jacqueline made a low sound in her throat and sat in the seat across from Bernard. “All this time I’ve been away from my family because I thought it was my fault that Dad was mad. That Mom is so sad. That she looks at me like she’s afraid, or disappointed. I’ve been trying to find myself and make myself my own person, y’know?”

Bernard nodded. 

“But I realized today that it wasn’t my fault! It’s Jack’s fault!” she got up angrily, her petticoat swishing quietly. “He hurt Mom and Dad, nearly killed me, and left the family! It’s his fault this all happened!”

“Volume, Jacqueline,” Bernard said, skimming through some documents. 

“Sorry,” she said, running her hands through her her. Pins went flying as the brown hair turned white and lay loose over her shoulders. “Goddess, these pins are a nightmare. I’m getting really tired of all these layers. And corsets, man they are tight,” she grumbled.

“So what made you come to this realization tonight?” Bernard asked. “And you could always not wear a corset.”

“You know me, I’m fond of the aristocracy. Their endless drama is hilarious. They’ll notice if I’m not wearing a corset. I try to have it done up fairly loose though, but it really hurts the sides either way.”

“I can imagine.”

“As for the latter question, I was at a ball listening to one of the ladies who was also having brother trouble. And while listening I realized that he was the reason everything is the way it is! Not me! And I’m so mad at myself for not realizing this sooner and I’m angry at everyone else for not realizing the exact same thing!”

“Volume, Jacqueline.”

“Right, sorry,” she said. She took a deep breath in and sat back down on her chair. Her pacing was bound to irritate the elf soon enough. “I swear to God Bernard, the next time I see Jack, if I ever see him again, I’m going to kick his arse.”

Bernard snorted. “I look forward to it.”

She sighed, anger aside for the time being. “Have you found what you’re looking for yet?”

“Not the deed, no. These are just ledgers. It’s just...the math is off. Something is missing. I think he might be skimming from the estates.”

“Dear lord,” Jacqueline said, standing up and moving to the back of the desk, looking over Bernard’s shoulder. “That’s more than enough to get him incarcerated.”

Bernard grinned. “Exactly what I was thinking. Now I just need to find the Deed, take it, and commit these ledgers to memory.”

“Why not just take them?”

“We’re trying to be stealthy, Jacqueline.”

“Right you are, my apologies.”

“Your manner of speaking is...interesting. How long have you been running around here in London?”

Jacqueline squinted. “Twenty years perhaps? I’ve lost count.” she cleared her throat. “I’ll try to refrain from talking like the ton.”

Bernard bit back a sarcastic you’re doing a great job. “Alright,” he said. “Now we just have to find that Deed.”

“Maybe he has it in a safe somewhere? Hidden behind a bookshelf? or per--I mean, maybe a portrait?”

“You may be on to something,” Bernard said. With a thoughtful frown, he brought his hands together and a large, golden light appeared. He tossed it upwards, illuminating the whole room. “What’ve we got here,” he said getting up and looking around.

“He is very full of himself,” Jacqueline stated, looking around. “Look at all these portraits! I bet a safe is behind one of those.”

“Now is it the obvious big one of him on that horse up there? Or is it the small family portrait there?”

“My money’s on the big one,” Jacqueline said. “From what you’ve told me, family seems to be the last thing on this guy’s mind.”

“Well, let’s give it a try.”

They approached the large portrait, which was probably twice the size of the two of them. They both grabbed one side of the portrait, ready to lift it.

“On three, okay?”

Jacqueline nodded.

“One...two...three.” They heaved and the portrait moved, revealing an indent in the wall where a small metal box sat, padlocked tight. 

“Yes!” Jacqueline shouted.

“Volume!” Bernard snapped.

“Sorry!” Jacqueline said, throwing her hands up which was, in fact, a very bad idea. As her hands went up, Bernard lost his grip on his side of the painting. It rattled, falling right off the wall and landing on the floor, the tip of the frame hitting the desk and resulting in a large bang.

Both the sprite and the elf paled and glanced at each other. Their heightened hearing picked up exactly what was happening down the hall.

“What on Earth was that?”

“Intruders!”

“It came from your office, Lord Clifton.”

“Grab the firearms men!!”

“Gingersnaps!” Bernard voiced.

“I am so sorry,” Jacqueline squeaked.

“It’s okay, it wasn’t your fault entirely. We should’ve levitated the picture, this thing is huge. I’m surprised we didn’t loose our grip on it earlier.” Bernard lifted his hand, the painting shifting off of the desk and to the side. “Now we just gotta pick the lock--”

“Freeze right there!” A voice said. A group of men had arrived at the door, muskets aimed.

“What? Those are children!”

“Hey! I have berets older than you!”

“Look at their ears!”

Lord Clifton narrowed his eyes. “They’re elves.”

“Not this nonsense again.”

“My brother sent you for the deed, didn’t he?”

“Maybe,” Jacqueline said. “And who are you calling an elf? I am a sprite. My ears have a rounded point, not a pointed point!”

“Can you handle these guys?” Bernard asked. Jacqueline nodded. “Good, I’ll take care of this.”

“Step away from there!” Lord Clifton shouted.

“I’ll pass,” Bernard said dryly.

“Then you have chosen your fate,” Another man said.

“I’m afraid we’ll have to decline, gentlemen,” Jacqueline said, smoothing out her dress and shoving her hands forwards.

A barrage of ice shot out from under her, shielding herself and Bernard as the men fired. Jacqueline frosted the ice over and over, doing her best to keep the bullets at bay.

Bernard meanwhile, was having a hard time. The loudness of the shots was distracting him from trying to magic the lock open. While he had full faith in Jacqueline to defend them well enough, he kept involuntarily flinching and ducking, shielding his face. This was not going well.

“Maybe we should just teleport out and call it a day,” he said.

“But the deed!” Jacqueline replied.

“I know! I know. But I can’t concentrate on the lock. There’s too much going on.”

“Bernard, look out!” Jacqueline shouted. A bullet had made it through her ice walls and was headed towards Bernard. Thinking fast, Jacqueline pushed him down, the bullet flying over them.

“I’ve had enough of these guys,” Bernard said, starting to get angry.

“I find myself fairly like minded,” Jacqueline said, as an icy dome began to sprout around them, Jacqueline’s hand a dark blue. “Let’s finish this,” she finished, offering him her other hand. He grabbed it and pulled himself up with Jacqueline’s help--

And suddenly, there was a flash of light and he wasn’t there anymore. Nor was Jacqueline, in fact.

“What?” They both said, in a voice that was not Bernard’s and not Jacqueline’s.

“We fused,” a part of them realized.

“Well this is a dangerous situation,” they replied to...themselves. They ran a hand through their hair; it was very long, and very curly. Another hand pushed themselves up to their knees, while two more hands held their head and picked up what seemed to be Bernard’s beret. Placing it on their head, they looked into the ice and saw their reflection.

“Four arms. Wow. I’ve never had this many arms before. Wait. We can get twice as much done now! We can grab the deed and put these guys on ice.” Their eyes widened. “I can do all that.”

Grinning, Berline waited until the gunshots stopped.

“Did we get them?” one of the men asked.

“I can’t tell,” Lord Clifton replied. “There’s too much damned ice!”

“And there’s about to be a lot more, gents,” Berline said. The ice cracked and out sprung Berline. The men backed away in confusion; the...thing in front of them had two eyes, one brown, one blue...and four arms. They towered over the men, a mischievous grin on their face.

Instantly they began to fire once more, terrified.

“Ah ah ah,” Berline said. Waving one hand, the ice around them flew into the air, hovering. They pushed the hand forward and the ice coated the guns. Another hand pushed back while the third hand grabbed the chest, the fourth hand freezing it. 

“See this?” Berline asked, gesturing to the guns that were now frozen solid and high above their heads. “This is how you get on the naughty list.” They balled their hand into a fist, and the muskets were crushed, thrown into a corner.

They stepped over the portrait, pushing it back up against the wall. It was much easier to manoeuvre now that they were fused. Berline lifted one hand lazily, and the men were blown back by a ferocious north wind, flying into the adjacent room. The doors slammed shut behind them, a click signifying that they had been magically locked.

Berline snorted, bringing the chest up to their eyes and squinting at the lock. “This will be much easier now that it’s quiet.” 

They blew on the lock, their face turning blue as a layer of frost grew around the lock. Hearing the inner mechanisms freezing and shattering, Berline crushed the padlock like it was an old piece of paper, and threw it in the trash pile. The lid popped open and inside Berline found, right on top of a few other files, the Deed to Clifton Manor, where Santa’s family happily resided and would continue to do so, now that Berline had gotten their hands on it.

“You put that back,” said a menacing voice.

“Ah,” Berline said. “Clifton. You know,” Berline walked forward, squatting down to better intimidate the guy. “I was gonna freeze the chest and crush it but honestly, it would be a shame to get rid of such a lovely safe.” They placed it down on the desk, still staring at Clifton.

“You will not get away with this vandalism.”

“Ha!” Berline said, grinning. “I think I will, Lord Clifton,” they said his name mockingly, one set of arms making quotations around the word ‘Lord’. “You wanna know why? Don’t answer, that’s rhetorical and I’m gonna tell you anyway.” they paused, looking Clifton up and down. “You tell the authorities that an Elf and a Sprite broke into your house, fused, and stole what you stole from your own brother? They’ll throw you right into an asylum, pal.”

Lord Clifton was speechless, staring at the fusion, fearful.

“Oh!” Berline said, one finger up. “I almost forgot!” the arm below that arm with the finger up grabbed some documents off of his desk. “I’ll be taking these as well.” They stood up and winked, stretching. “I’ll see you where you belong, Lord Clif-ton. In prison.”

And with that, Berline disappeared in a flurry of gold sparks and snowflakes.

Explaining what had happened to Santa had been interesting, especially since Berline had stuck around for the explanation.

Santa had been overjoyed that they had gotten him the deed, and was even more impressed with the ledgers they had found. He was able to bring his brother to justice and keep the family safe.

From then on, Jacqueline tagged along on Bernard’s errands for Santa. Just in case things took a turn for the worse.

Which happened quite sooner than Bernard had thought.

(HA! FINISHED! I’m so excited with this though it did get lengthy! I hope you guys love Berline bc I love them. And Jackie Frost! Thus we have the introduction to the fusion AU. up next: Fusion AU Part II: The Bernelle Bit ;D

Also I accidentally wrote the canon Clifton Manor Incident. Now you guys know what that was about! ;P)

[uncannedmusic]

||| 21 of 2016 ||| Our Favorite Albums of Last Year

"Well never mind, we are ugly but we have the music," goes one of Leonard Cohen’s lovers in “Chelsea Hotel #2.” That may be about as hopeful as we can muster in a 2016 retrospect. Maybe we got our hopes up and forgot for a minute that doom is still eventual, inevitable. Great progressions, great setbacks, the same remote smudge on the universe. But we have the music.

It was another reassuring, optimistic year in recorded sound. The continued hybridization of musical traditions is an interior method with adventuresome, exterior motives and we’ve bound bravely into a new era of music-making. In that regard, it really isn’t such a bad time to be alive. Here's the proof: a list of 2016 standouts that receive the highest recommendation from your dear friends at Uncanned Music.

21) Mary Lattimore - At The Dam (Ghostly International, March 04 2016)

The harp has long been known as the most “heavenly” instrument. But as played by Mary Lattimore--in long, looping, droning, aimlessly explorative passages--it seems more suited to a sort of purgatory than the commonly-accepted concept of heaven. Please don’t mistake--this is no charge of a lack of beauty. At The Dam is suspended in a state of all-encompassing bliss that is true paradise for the non-progressive spiritualist, a static instrumental meditation in fully-present grace. It simply never feels like it exists at any sort of end or is even working its way towards any sort of end. It lacks the finality and intentionality required for passage into “heaven.” It is simply a collection of singular, infinite dazes that start and stop within themselves constantly and at indeterminate points, totally devoid of time concept, relinquishing its blessed listeners from the tyranny of destiny. -SM

20) Wei Zhongle - Nice Mask Over An Ugly Face (Pretty Purgatory, August 15 2016)

“Hungry freaks, daddy!” Outlandish Chicago four-piece’s latest mini-album is a substantial swerve to the left incorporating a deranged funk stent in their avant-folk primitivisms. The result is early Liars dipped in Hawaiian Tropic tanning oil or maybe a mescaline-rationed Brandon Boyd trapped in Bollywood Park. The finest outcome, though, is that Wei Zhongle’s wry outsider sensibility invites this kind of indulgent miasma of reactions. Nice Mask Over An Ugly Face is a 19-minute-clocking deviant wail of euphoria. -JD

19) Battle Trance - Blade of Love (NNA Tapes, August 26 2016)

Blade of Love is a striking force that evokes the power of nature--primal, elemental, raw, traversing extremes of delicate beauty and chaotic dissonance. Through seamless and inventive use of extended techniques, a quartet of tenor saxophonists (!!) perform lone takes that cut straight to the heart. How this album succeeds at touching on a very human and emotional level is a testament to the strength of composer Travis Laplante’s vision. -DA

18) Savoy Motel - Savoy Motel (What’s Yr Rupture?, October 21 2016)

Savoy Motel’s debut release has the choogle of T Rex’s Electric Warrior but slimmed down, teeth bare and extremely high. Fronted by Cheap Time’s Jeffrey Novak, this young supergroup of new-Nashville scene veterans refreshingly lacks the clearly inflated ego of most current Nashville bands. Taut funky rhythm guitar from Mimi Galbierz (Heavy Cream) is topped by pleasurably decadent wet-noodle fuzz leads by Dillon Watson (D. Watusi) and, while chunky drumming from Jessica McFarland (Meemaw/Heavy Cream) keeps it all moving, her vocal contributions threaten to upstage the whole show. Novak’s songwriting is as strong as ever and he coos with the sleazy charisma of a cult leader. It turns out, however, that the charming boogie of his newly recruited band is what makes Savoy Motel his most interesting project to date. -DA

17) Anderson .Paak - Malibu (OBE, January 22 2016)

Here is another hard-working veteran getting their due. However from the perspective of an uninitiated mainstream music listener, it seemed like Anderson .Paak was everywhere, out of nowhere, in 2016. The premiere voice on both of NxWorries’s fantastic Stones Throw 2016 releases, as well as a featured guest on The Blank Face LP by Schoolboy Q and the (probably-should-have-made-this-list) new album from A Tribe Called Quest, .Paak gets his propers from us for his sophomore effort as a lead artist, Malibu. A highly-enjoyable listen, Malibu showcases .Paak’s talents as a singer, songwriter, producer AND drummer across a catchy collage contextually themed (in the spirit of his 2014 debut, Venice Beach) around the beauties and tragedies of his Southern Californian lifestyle. -SM

16) Huerco S. - For Those of You Who Have Never (And Also Those Who Have) (Proibito, April 26 2016)

Recent Brooklyn-by-way-of-Kansas City transplant Brian Leeds is the experimental electronic producer known as Huerco S. A few years of vacillating between ambient strictures and a sturdy leftfield techno preoccupation led to April’s For Those of You Who Have Never (And Also Those Who Have), one of 2016’s finest experimental pursuits. A monument to headphone meditation therapy, on For Those of You…, Huerco S. discovers the personality of compounded textures and their vibrant and natural ability to express rhythm independently of traditional percussion. For Those of You… is a sonic immensity elegantly fashioned from the frailest but most voluminous strands. -JD

15) The Avalanches - Wildflower (Astralwerks, July 08 2016)

All of the mixed reactions over The Avalanches’ return after a 16-year gap between records caused Wildflower to get a bit lost in the shuffle last year. Though there seems to be a faint pulse of Big Beat resurgence in the air, Wildflower barely seemed to raise an eyebrow. Perhaps we didn’t have enough time to digest the extensive 21 tracks or we couldn’t humor the romping joviality amid the looming sociopolitical fears. Context aside, Wildflower wields some of the best electronic pop tracks of the year. The symphonic collages are buoyant, sunny, beach blanket sensations strung together by chutes and ladders of soul samples. The hope is that our outlook will improve enough at some point for us all to appreciate them. Or, as The Avalanches might suggest, it may require a move to Australia. -JD

14) Jackie Lynn - Jackie Lynn (Thrill Jockey, June 10 2016)

Haley Fohr/Circuit Des Yeux’s outlaw alter-ego Jackie Lynn is confident and smooth; a futuristic cowgirl crooner who’s almost nostalgic yet clearly malcontent and on the move. Playful synthetic beats and softly twanging guitar creating a welcoming world crowned by Fohr’s distinctive voice and rich storytelling. With the expert assistance of the Bitchin’ Bajas bizarro Wrecking Crew, this album is Circuit Des Yeux’s most finely produced work. Jackie Lynn is steely cool but something dark is off here. She has the aura of David Bowie’s character in The Man Who Fell To Earth. Before you can unravel the secrets of her story, she is gone. Hopefully, though, we will hear from her again. -DA

13) Moor Mother - Fetish Bones (Don Giovanni, September 30 2016)

Camae Ayewa, aka Moor Mother Goddess, aka Moor Mother on her 2016 breakout Fetish Bones, beats around no bushes with her poetry. She decries police brutality, systemic racism and the centuries-deep plight of black people over dense bouts of percussive noise. At times, the sonic qualities recall art-punk and Bauhaus-inspired noise-rap outfits like Dalek and Death Grips, at other times the harshest industrial pulses of My Life With The Thrill Kill Cult and Pigface. A hard-working organizer and leading voice in Philadelphia’s underground/DIY scene for some time, Ayewa’s partnership with Don Giovanni Records combined with the cultural climate of 2016 generated a massive audience for her far-from-easy-to-digest music, earning Fetish Bones highlights in major publications like Rolling Stone and Pitchfork. No argument here; certainly one of the most important documents of the year. -SM

12) Solange - A Seat at the Table (Columbia, September 30 2016)

If 2016 was the year the icon died, it was also the birth of a new class of artistic leadership. A Seat at the Table is Solange’s graduation from pop chanteuse to soul royalty. With the humble empowerment of the opening lines, “fall in your ways so you can wake up and rise,” Solange identifies the timeliness of spiritual and emotional guidance. Her melancholy on “Cranes in the Sky” is material and her romantic navigations on “Borderline (An Ode to Self Care)” are erudite and virtuous. Solange’s register, moreover, is one of calm contemplation. It, in combination with A Seat at the Table’s delicate pulse of piano-led modern R&B is a gracious statement of purpose and a firm plea for empathy. -JD

11) Africans With Mainframes - K.M.T. (Soul Jazz, May 06 2016)

Longtime Chicago orbiters Noleian Reusse and Jamal Moss (aka Hieroglyphic Being) blast into the Soul Jazz universe with a relentless acid house hardware assault. As driving and exploding as it is mesmerizing and entrancing. K.M.T. is a cybernetic machine gun suite that shoots both bullets of love and bullets of fire. -SM

10) Badbadnotgood - IV (Innovative Leisure, July 08 2016)

On IV, these jazz-school outcasts turned breakbeat superstars have reigned in their act to achieve a more refined cohesion of groove and style, a tasty mellow piece of modern mood-jazz. This record sounds dope--like a 21st century remodel of Morricone’s finest 70’s lounge themes. The juicy production would make David Axelrod smile. After their illustrious collab w/ Ghostface Killah (2015’s SOUR SOUL), BBNG sound like they have less to prove. More comfortable in their own skin and playing host to memorable guest features including Kaytranada & Future Islands’ Samuel T. Herring, IV is their best album yet. -DA

9) Jamire Williams - ///// EFFECTUAL (Leaving Records, December 02 2016)

Heard from the front as the lead artist of ERIMAJ, and from the side as a drummer for the likes of Christian Scott, Robert Glasper, Jeff Parker, and many more, Jamire Williams’s distinctively colorful, minimal and textural percussion has always projected a more finely artistic vibe than the average modern jazz drummer. His elegant rhythmic expressions are distinctively present in all the aforementioned, often swaying over swinging, sounding like a bastard child of Thelonious Monk on traps. For his first eponymous release, Jamire worked with producer Carlos Niño to channel the spirit of Jack DeJohnette’s solo percussion recordings of the 1970s. ///// EFFECTUAL is a collection of purely focused portraits, along the lines of DeJohnette’s Pictures, but utilizes an updated palette (beatboxes, hard-compression, hovering synths) to paint more contemporarily communicable abstract sound canvases. -SM

8) Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds - Skeleton Tree (Bad Seeds Ltd, September 09 2016)

Dismissal is a common response to late career offerings from prolific artists. Expectations of softer treads on well-worn territory are safe, simple ways to disengage as a listener. In the case of Nick Cave’s #16 studio album with the Bad Seeds, however, dismissal is a certain mistake. Skeleton Tree is exemplary of Cave’s brittle and transcendent songcraft. Cave as balladeer hasn’t struck so emotionally rife and raw as he does on “Rings of Saturn” and “I Need You” in over a decade (see: Abattoir Blues / Lyre of Orpheus). He has, once again, improved brilliantly on the form. Madman balladry may be well-worn but the difference is that Cave’s treads press deeper with contour and detail and illuminate the lively oeuvre of one of our dearest masters. -JD

7) Rob Mazurek & Jeff Parker - Some Jellyfish Live Forever (Rogue Art, February 19 2016)

The first duo recording from these longtime collaborators is a masterwork of strange and sublime beauty. Curious melodies are set to explore and delight a minimally textured Eno-esque palette of guitar, cornet and electronics with effortless command of tone and space. The alien movement of jellyfish is an apt image here; the rhythmic pulse seems infinitely repetitive yet changes occur subtly and/or suddenly over time. Placid and hypnotic, tension looms in tacit danger and dissonance. A fitting soundtrack for eternity in a submerged world. -DA

6) Jay Daniel - Broken Knowz (Technicolour, November 25 2016)

House music’s relentless mechanized beat is a polarizing force which often alienates instrumentalists and perhaps drummers in particular. Jay Daniel’s November debut is a history in reverse--the electronic producer retreats to the drum kit for rejuvenation and thusly lights the way forward. The acoustical warmth of Daniel’s loops and his rigid minimization of layers casts the spotlight onto the elements of the beat and makes Broken Knowz one of the most generous gateways into dance music to date. -JD

5) Carlos Niño & Friends - Flutes, Echoes, It’s All Happening! (Leaving Records, April 22 2016)

The majestic mellow of Venice Beach scene sage Carlos Niño has been steadily seeping into the experimental electronic, jazz and future soul sounds of Los Angeles, and the vision of its omni-present aura is nowhere more materialized than on Flutes, Echoes, It’s All Happening! Niño’s opus takes a more spiritually guided approach to blissed out orchestration in the veins of Martin Denny and Yanni, or Enya and Esquivel. But it’s most like the way Alice Coltrane & Pharaoh Sanders would interpret those purveyors of New Age and Exotica. -SM

4) Kendrick Lamar - untitled unmastered. (Aftermath, March 04 2016)

We chose not to include To Pimp A Butterfly in our 2015 list. What was immediately clear as the album of a generation did not need mention on our humble year-end recap. The addendum and expansion that is untitled unmastered. was dropped so quickly on its heels and with so little fanfare it was almost shocking--needless proof of the deep talent Kendrick & Co. have to offer. This record is just badass and so fun to listen to. Its unfiltered quality feels authentic and immediate. We are living in a trying time that calls for action and, in guiding form, Kendrick wastes no time overthinking it. He just delivers. -DA

3) Elza Soares - A Mulher Do Fim Do Mundo (Mais Um, June 10 2016)

Bygone Brazilian pop icon Elza Soares embodies A Mulher Do Fim Do Mundo (“The Woman At The End Of The World”)--extraterrestrially fashioned and coming in ablaze at seventy-something-years-old, a raging backdraft of feminine fire. She cuts no slack, unapologetically rallying and railing against oppressive patriarchal norms and the slew of imminent social issues accompanying 2016’s troubling influx of Brazilian neo-fascism. Elza’s pertinent messages are delivered passionately over brooding avant-garde dirty samba grooves, a perfect pairing. For tonal and textural fans of Toms Ze and Waits.      -SM

2) Mica Levi & Oliver Coates - Remain Calm (Slip, November 25 2016)

Though the 13 Neo-classical passages of Remain Calm may have been suited as a film score like Mica Levi’s other recent work (namely Jackie and Under the Skin), there’s a deliberate singularity to the article as a whole. Composing looped electronics and vocal samples next to Oliver Coates’ bellowing cello drones is placidly hair-raising. On Remain Calm, Levi and Coates finesse tonally grim noirs with lush acoustics signalling a prevailing existentialism within a cold and malevolent landscape. The linguistics of track titles (“Bless Our Toes,” “Dolphins Climb Onto the Shore for the First Time”) and the clipped vocal utterances reveal a resoluteness of human spirit while the network of influences reveal a lucidity of musical history and social consciousness. Remain Calm is remarkable, transcendent and unveils two collaborators working at the peak of their creative powers. -JD

1) Horse Lords - Interventions (Northern Spy, April 29 2016)

This Baltimore quartet have been revising the ‘rock band’ format since 2012, escaping the genre’s binds and mashing up a selection of 20th/21st century avant-gardeisms with faraway folk styles in their just-intonated Sahara Desert cruising machine.

Interventions is a blazing technicolor display of the ideas they’ve laid out in black & white before, a building and stripping of polyrhythmic layers tightly woven into their unique brand of groove. Mesmerizing left field jammers are broken up by could-be snippets of the members’ minimalist solo works; explorative ‘interventions’ that critically punctuate the album. Horse Lords distill challenging and diverse elements down into music that is incredibly palpable. All of that to say, the record is still fun. There is a head-nodding booty-shaking catchiness throughout. A refreshing reboot of rock music, Interventions is a hypnotically immersive listen. -DA

::: FURTHER READING :::

Uncanned Music’s BEST OF 2015 (new albums)

Uncanned Music’s BEST OF 2014 (new albums, reissues, compilations)

Uncanned Music's BEST OF 2013 (new albums)

Uncanned Music's BEST OF 2013 (reissues/compilations)

Uncanned Music's BEST OF 2012 (new albums)

[brentrogers]

Podcast: BoJack Horseman and Celebrity Mental Health Advocacy

 

Rich celebrity on TV: “Have you ever been sad? You might have depression.” If scenarios like this make you want to throw a rock at a window, you aren’t alone. In today’s episode, Gabe expresses his distaste for celebrities posing as the “face” of mental illness. He feels further validated after watching a satirical episode of BoJack Horseman, in which Mr. Peanutbutter, a cheerful canine celebrity, becomes the new face of depression — first as a “sad dog” meme and then as a depression spokesperson.

What do you think? Tune in to hear Jackie and Gabe get into a thoughtful discussion on whether celebrities acting as the “face” of mental illness is a good or bad thing.

(Transcript Available Below)

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About The Not Crazy Podcast Hosts

Gabe Howard is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations, available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from Gabe Howard. To learn more, please visit his website, gabehoward.com.

        Jackie Zimmerman has been in the patient advocacy game for over a decade and has established herself as an authority on chronic illness, patient-centric healthcare, and patient community building. She lives with multiple sclerosis, ulcerative colitis, and depression.

You can find her online at JackieZimmerman.co, Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

    Computer Generated Transcript for “B0Jack- Mental Health” Episode

Editor’s Note: Please be mindful that this transcript has been computer-generated and therefore may contain inaccuracies and grammar errors. Thank you.

Announcer: You’re listening to Not Crazy, a Psych Central podcast. And here are your hosts, Jackie Zimmerman and Gabe Howard.

Gabe: Hey, everyone, and welcome to Not Crazy. I’m here with my co-host, Jackie, who lives with major depression.

Jackie: And you know my co-host, Gabe, who lives with bipolar disorder.

Gabe: And today we are going to talk about BoJack Horseman. The show is ending. The show’s on Netflix. Most people have heard of it, but it did something exciting. Longtime fans of the show know that there’s this thing that I dislike and they sort of did it on BoJack, which validated me in ways that I cannot explain. It just made me so happy, Jackie.

Jackie: So much so that you sent me a text that said, have you seen this? And I was like, no. And then you said, I feel so heard and validated. We must talk about this. And I said, OK, fine.

Gabe: And you agreed to watch three episodes of a show that you’d never watched before. What did you think of it? Did you like the show?

Jackie: I hated it.

Gabe: Hate is a strong word.

Jackie: I literally hated it.

Gabe: Ok. But Adam liked it.

Jackie: Adam and I watched it together and Adam cursed Gabe a few times, like, why the fuck did Gabe tell us to watch this show? The general consensus over here, it’s pretty awful.

Gabe: It is a very popular show and people are sad that it is being canceled after hearing Jackie’s scathingly mean review. I kind of wish BoJack was real because he’d be like, Not Crazy podcast. I hated it. It was awful. And then he’d drink and pass out drunk, which if you’re a fan of the show, is hilarious, but just a meaningless aside that makes Gabe very, very happy.

Jackie: Well, you asked me to watch three episodes. I fell asleep through two of them. But I will say that the moment that I saw what you were talking about, I recognized it and I was like, OK, I see you. So do you want to tell everybody what happened?

Gabe: To back up just a little bit, BoJack Horseman, it’s a cartoon and all of the characters are very one dimensional. BoJack, he used to be famous. He’s narcissistic. He’s an alcoholic. And he has depression. And that’s just who he is. The character that we’re gonna be talking about for the remainder of the show is a character called Mr. Peanutbutter. Mr. Peanutbutter is also famous. He’s also an actor. He’s a yellow golden retriever. And he’s very happy. He’s basically my wife as a cartoon character. He’s just eternal sunshine. He’s Pollyanna. No matter what happens in the world, he can find the good in it. And that’s his one dimensional character.

Jackie: This character’s so happy and positive that in the show they’re trying to find ways to keep him in the public eye or something. I don’t know, I fell asleep. But his assistant maybe, I don’t know, somebody was like, we’ll make these memes with your face on them. And the memes were sad dog memes. And he was like, I’m not a sad dog. I don’t like these. I can’t relate to them because I’m not sad. Like his whole point on the show is to be like a peppy dog.

Gabe: Yeah, he is an extraordinarily happy dog and he’s famous. That’s all you need to know. They do find a picture. Just a single picture of him looking sad. And they make their memes. They’re called the sad dog memes and social media being what it is, it takes off like gangbusters. The sad dog meme is everywhere. People love it. And that gives him a small amount, just a tiny amount, of notoriety as a sad dog. And sadness is a quick jump over to depression. Mr. Peanutbutter has depression. So the powers that be decide that they want to make him in the face of depression and they pay him to go on tour and to make PSA’s and to do all of this stuff to advance the cause of mental health advocacy, of getting checked for depression. For this guy who doesn’t have it.

Jackie: And Gabe is so furious that they’ve given a cartoon dog, this stance where he is the face of depression, which is ridiculous. This is where I was like, OK, I see what Gabe is talking about. Where somebody who probably is not clinically depressed

Gabe: No, there’s no probably. He doesn’t. He does not have it.

Jackie: Well, I meant like in like real life. Like transferring to real life, not cartoon world now, the face of mental illness slash depression in huge mental illness advocacy spaces, celebrities who may or may not live with an actual mental illness, who are now speaking on behalf of us, for us, to the whole world for lots and lots of money. So I see your point. But – no, that’s it. I just I see your point.

Gabe: In the show, Mr. Peanutbutter actually has a conversation where he says, look, I don’t have depression, and the person who is trying to encourage him to take this cash grab says, well, that’s one of the hallmarks of depression, not thinking that you have depression. So I should point out that in the show, he’s sort of tricked into being the face of depression. But I want to be clear, he doesn’t have depression. He’s not depressed. He’s never been mentally ill. None of these things are true. But he becomes the face of depression and people start listening to him on what he thinks they should do and the world should do to be better. And suddenly he becomes the expert. This dog who has no mental illness, who’s never suffered from depression, who’s never researched depression, who is not a doctor, a therapist. He’s never even been a mental health advocate. All of the sudden becomes who people are listening to to get their information and to make their mental health decisions. I see this happening in the real world all the time and it drives me crazy. In fairness, for two reasons. One, because I want all that money not going to lie. I want the money. It should be me. But two, because this is dangerous. We’re following people who don’t understand our lives, who don’t understand what they’re doing or talking about. And we’re listening to them as if their opinions or information is accurate and valid. I believe that hurts people.

Jackie: Ok, questions. First question. Let’s say these spokespeople don’t live with mental illness. But what if they just really support the cause? They have a loved one with mental illness?

Gabe: Then say that. We see this in the case of Bring Change to Mind and Glenn Close. Glenn Close supports her sister and her nephew, who live with severe and persistent mental illness. Glenn Close says that. She founded an organization. She gives a stage to people like her sister, who lives with bipolar disorder, and her nephew, who lives with schizoaffective disorder, and helps them get their message out there. I think that that is a very positive use of celebrity and yeah, I’m a fan of Glenn Close.

Jackie: Well, mee, too. Who isn’t, right? But next question, even if they are not somebody who lives with, but they are somebody with a lot of clout. They’re well known. They are super famous and they’re bringing attention to the cause and or organization. Maybe fundraising for a lot of money, is it really so bad?

Gabe: So yes and no, right? In your example, you’re like they have a lot of clout. They’re bringing a lot of attention and they’re raising a lot of money. Is that bad? No. If you consider those four things then no, of course not. Where would that be bad? But that’s generally not what’s happening. Because if that was happening, you probably wouldn’t know they were behind it. The number of people that don’t realize that Glenn Close started Bring Change to Mind is staggering because she’s not front and center. The organization is I’m talking about the people that are charging $25,000 for speeches, who are travelling the circuit, who are doing PSA’s. But, I almost question who wrote these things. They don’t even look accurate. Are you feeling sad? You might have depression. Why are we equating sadness and depression? This is like saying, are you feeling wet? You might be drowning. There’s a world of difference between having water on your skin and drowning. But this is the kind of misinformation that gets perpetuated by, I’m gonna say, well-meaning people. But just because you’re a celebrity, that makes you a good celebrity. It doesn’t make you a good spokesperson for an illness. And I don’t think people have an understanding of this because celebrities aren’t used to being told no and they can afford to run their own campaigns.

Jackie: So in this scenario, what should they be doing? Right? Mental health organization needs a spokesperson. What should they be doing?

Gabe: In your example, if they want to lend their names, celebrity and money to a mental health organization, I think that is very appropriate because what they would say is, hi, my name is Joe Celebrity and I want you to support Mental Health United States of America Nonprofit with your time and energy. They have the correct information. They have vetted it, and I am using my celebrity to raise attention for it. And also, here’s a whole bunch of money so they can offer their programs, their information, etc. for free. I think that’s extraordinarily appropriate. But that’s not what a lot of these folks are doing. They’re showing up on late night TV saying I have depression and anxiety and it was so awful for me and the stigma was great. And you should hire me to tell you my story. How is paying you $25,000 to tell me what it’s like to be a multi-millionaire with an anxiety helping people with schizophrenia? And I’m being serious. If you can tell me how that is helping, I will back off immediately.

Jackie: I see your point here, and I could probably argue it either way. Right. I can say yes. Clearly, celebrities with all of their money and assistance and whatever their stories are not as relatable as, let’s say, you or I. However, does it make their stories any less true or meaningful?

Gabe: This is where life is hard, right? Because there’s a real human element here. I don’t want to tell Joe Celebrity that his story isn’t relevant because he is famous and rich. But I do want Joe Celebrity to understand that his story is not typical and we get into this, I’m going to call it a problem, with all forms of advocacy. It’s like white privilege or male privilege. You know, women are like, look, you’re getting extra because you’re a man. And then the man says, well, that’s not fair. I worked hard. Nobody’s saying that you didn’t work hard. We’re just saying that you didn’t have to overcome your gender. If you are wealthy and you have access to money and resources. Your situation is not the same as the average Joe non-celebrity who is being diagnosed with these things. And I would just like to see one of these people stand up and say, you know, I’m a multimillionaire. I’m a millionaire. I have been world famous for a decade. And I just now came out because that’s how terrified I was of admitting that I had a mental illness. So I don’t know what hope the rest of you have that aren’t multi-millionaires, that aren’t world famous, because I was terrified to do it with all of my resources. And you’re just a regular person who may or may not have health insurance, but that’s never the message, is it? The messages is that they’re so brave that they’re so brave and we must embrace them by hiring them to speak and tell us how they’re exactly like us, except they’re not exactly like us at all. I want some acknowledgement that they’re not exactly like us.

Jackie: They’re not. I don’t want to defend celebrities here, but I could argue, if I was going to argue this point, I don’t know if I am. But hypothetically, if I were to argue this point, they have a lot more to lose than your average person, let’s say their career. Yes, you or I could lose our career as well. But my career doesn’t mean losing millions of dollars. It is worse because then I would probably for sure be homeless. They probably wouldn’t be homeless. I don’t know. Maybe I’m not arguing this appropriately because I am talking myself out of the argument as we’re doing it right now. I don’t know. On the show, somebody who is not depressed acts as a depression advocate. That is not OK. Right? If you don’t have it, don’t pretend you have it. No good. We can both agree on that.

Gabe: And it’s important to recognize that the reason that a show that is watched by millions of people is lampooning this is because it’s relatable. It’s because it happens. It’s because it’s occurring. I always said that I want to be so famous that The Simpsons make fun of me on The Simpsons because The Simpsons only make fun of you on The Simpsons after you’ve made it. They’re not making fun of people you’ve never heard of. The reason that BoJack Horseman, the television show, was making fun of this is because it is so consistent in our culture that they made fun of it and they knew that it would get laughs and people would relate to it. They’re not making this up out of thin air. This happens constantly, constantly. Our top advocates in the space are suddenly people that what? What did they do?

Jackie: Well, first of all, excellent use of lampooning, just saying,

Gabe: I’ve been using big words.

Jackie: Well, that was a good one.

Gabe: We’ll be right back after these messages.

Announcer: Interested in learning about psychology and mental health from experts in the field? Give a listen to the Psych Central Podcast, hosted by Gabe Howard. Visit PsychCentral.com/Show or subscribe to The Psych Central Podcast on your favorite podcast player.

Announcer: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.com. Secure, convenient, and affordable online counseling. Our counselors are licensed, accredited professionals. Anything you share is confidential. Schedule secure video or phone sessions, plus chat and text with your therapist whenever you feel it’s needed. A month of online therapy often costs less than a single traditional face to face session. Go to BetterHelp.com/PsychCentral and experience seven days of free therapy to see if online counseling is right for you. BetterHelp.com/PsychCentral.

Gabe: We’re back discussing the role celebrities play in mental health advocacy.

Jackie: Can we stop beating around the bush here? Who are you talking about?

Gabe: I mean, I don’t need a bunch of famous people pissed off at me. I don’t know that I want to name people because I cannot possibly have an exhaustive list. And one of the reasons that I can’t have an exhaustive list is because, you have like, who I consider probably the most dangerous mental health advocate, and that’s Kanye West. He’s extraordinarily dangerous. And what he’s saying, and his message, and he’s extremely popular right now. But then you have sort of the less offensive people. And I’m not going to name them because they’re not necessarily charging even for speeches. They just bring it up. They’re just minding their own business one day. And they’re like, hey, by the way, I have depression, too. And then there’s a whole article about how, I’m going to say his name, and I feel bad because I love this guy. And I just saw his movie, Dwayne Johnson. And all of a sudden there’s an article about how The Rock has depression. Now, that’s not necessarily his fault because he’s not offering himself up as a mental health advocate. He didn’t give a press release. He just said it in an interview. And now it’s everywhere. So he’s become a de-facto depression advocate, even though he never asked for it and isn’t trying to be. And that’s why I use him as an example. This is really rough. If you’re somebody suffering from depression, right? Because after all, The Rock did it, why can’t you? And is his information correct? But it’s not his information, it’s the media’s information that’s twisting it. Then we’d have to do a show on how the media fucks everything up.

Jackie: Which we totally could. But here’s the thing. There’s no winning, everybody loses because.

Gabe: Right.

Jackie: Either The Rock in this example, which first of all you said Dwayne Johnson, I was like, who is that? Because.

Gabe: He’s always going to be The Rock.

Jackie: He’d, just say The Rock. Everybody just knows him.

Gabe: The Rock.

Jackie: Because he says, hey, I’m depressed, which is what we want everybody to do. We want it to be normalized, we want to talk about it and then the media runs with it, which they will. He’s a celebrity and you’re like, that’s annoying. I hate that. But if they wouldn’t have done that, you wouldn’t have known he was depressed. It wouldn’t have been more normalized. He’s just a normal dude living with depression. It feels like a celebrity cannot come out in your perspective here as living with mental illness unless they are saying now I’m going to be a top advocate because I actually live with this. If they’re just casually telling the world I have mental illness, it’s not OK with you.

Gabe: See, and that sounds really awful to me,

Jackie: It is.

Gabe: Like I want to beat Gabe up.

Jackie: Yeah.

Gabe: This is what I struggle with, I am really, really, really upset when I think about all of the mental health advocates that have literally lost everything. A long time ago, people were like, Gabe, will you volunteer to do X, Y, and Z at my conference, my nonprofit, my event, my drop in center? And I would always point out that they’re not asking me to work for free. They’re asking me to work for negative money. I’m losing money because websites and gas and podcasts and microphones and studio time, all this shit costs money. So I’m taking my own money and dumping in thousands upon thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours. And I don’t have the clout as a casual mention by The Rock. Now, that’s not his fault. That’s just our celebrity-obsessed culture. But it does get to me. It does. I’m not going to lie. It bothers me that celebrities casually mention that they suffered from depression 10 years ago for 20 minutes and they immediately have a platform one hundred million times the size of people like me who have been paying my own way, doing my own research, and talking to thousands of people for a decade. And nobody wants to listen to me because, hey, I wasn’t in Jumanji.

Jackie: But Gabe, this is advocacy, right? Like I see what you’re saying. It’s valid, but one, there there’s a space for every advocate in advocacy. Even if The Rock doesn’t want to be an advocate, the people he’s reaching by admitting being depressed are probably not the same people we’re reaching. Let’s be real. Our audiences, I think, are maybe a little bit different. Also, I don’t know, maybe I have this grandiose opinion of the advocacy that we do, and it’s not nearly as impressive as I think it is. But I look at it like look at the work people did in the LGBTQ space 30 years ago. Right? They did so much work. They were protesting. They were rioting. They were doing all this bananas stuff. They put their lives at risk. They were arrested. All this bananas shit, so people today can just live their lives. And while the example is not lateral, I feel like you’re doing all this work. You’re spending your money, your time, your energy, all of these things for not a ton of clout. But the whole point is to make this easier for people in the future. Right? We want them to feel like there’s less stigma. We want them to feel supported. We want them to get help. That’s why I do this.

Gabe: Yeah, I’m doing it for the money and the fame.

Jackie: You’re in the wrong business.

Gabe: No. No, I’m not doing it for the money and the fame.

Jackie: But a little bit of money and fame would be nice.

Gabe: I do need to eat. I would just like to pay my bills. I want to break even a little bit. Nobody should feel sorry for Gabe Howard and I’m genuinely and honestly not advocating for that. I don’t want a bunch of emails saying, you know, Gabe, you know, we’re sorry that you can’t eat. I’m a fat guy. I can eat just fine. I’m good. But this is hard work. And sometimes it gets to me as a patient because it. Mental health advocates in general don’t have a lot of clout and patients have even less clout than that. And I know it’s a lot to be said, and I’m probably picking on celebrities. They’re an easy target, but it’s hard to watch a multimillionaire cry about living with anxiety. When I go down to the prisons and the jails and I watch them live with severe and persistent mental illness. When I’ve gone to funerals of people who have died by suicide. When I look at all the states that can’t pass Medicaid expansion. So even though we have people ready, willing, and able to get treated for their mental illness, they can’t see a doctor because they don’t have insurance. When I see homeless camps get raided by the police because they’re a blight on the community and I watch people die in winter because they can’t find shelter. And I’m supposed to shed a tear for a multi millionaire? And then I see all of these groups paying them tens of thousands of dollars to come speak at their events, knowing the horror show that people with severe and persistent mental illness are going through. I’m sorry. I just want to call bullshit and walk out of the room. I do. I can’t help it. I’m sure they’re fine people and their mothers love them. And I want to hug them. I do. I’m sorry they went through this, but my initial response is, please, you’ve gotta be kidding me.

Jackie: I think it’s fine if that’s your initial response. One of my favorite things I learned in therapy is that your first initial response is basically what you were conditioned to think throughout your whole life. Right? So if your first response is something that’s arguably negative or racist or sexist or something terrible, it’s kind of that deep rooted thing that you’ve learned from society, your family, whatever. The second thought that comes a split second later, that’s really what you think. And that has been really helpful for me in therapy. And I think, I’m assuming, I am putting words in your mouth, one hundred percent. The first thought is this is bullshit. That’s not fair. They have all the resources in the world. They are not recognizing their privilege. And the second thought is they’re still people. It’s all relative. And if they’re feeling anxious because of whatever’s happening in their life, that’s still valid.

Gabe: That’s my third response. My second response is, use your privilege, use your celebrity. Use your money to help the people that I just mentioned and the celebrities who are doing that, my hats are off to them. And Lady Gaga is one. She is using her position to raise money for the National Council to offer Mental Health Youth First Aid to teachers and coaches and help stem suicide. Hats off to her. Hats off to her and Carrie Fisher. She’s gone now, but she really did a lot of great work. But I’m not seeing a lot of that. I’m not.

Jackie: How do you know that that won’t be like what The Rock does? You have to sort of come out, right? This is him saying, hey, I have depression. If he was to be a mental illness advocate and just came on the scene and was like, hey, everybody, I’m depressed, let’s do this together, you’d be like, what the hell? Since when is The Rock depressed? This is bullshit. He’s not even really depressed. They all do. They have to establish a baseline of like, hey, I have this. A lot of celebrities do this where they sort of come out to the media of like whatever health ailment they have. A lot of them then take that as a stepping stone to doing advocacy. But I think that if he just came out and was working with whoever as their new spokesperson, you would have exactly the same issue that you had with BoJack Horseman. You’d be like, this is bullshit. That guy does not have that thing.

Gabe: So you’re right. When The Rock, and I don’t know why we’re picking on The Rock. That guy is so strong. Couldn’t I have picked on a weaker guy and one that I liked a lot less? I just love The Rock. Please, don’t body slam me if you’re listening. But right now, he’s got a lot of words. You’re right. I will respect him more when he has a lot of actions. But to the most pressing point, he doesn’t have to and he didn’t do anything wrong. I’m kind of a little bit sad that we’re using him as an example because all he said was I suffer from depression. He didn’t charge anybody $25,000 to talk about it. He just said it out loud. So actually, my hat’s off to people like him. I’m really focusing on the people that are making money, being famous and having mental illness.

Jackie: I think we’re saying the same thing in a different way. So maybe we should just agree to agree with a slight side of disagreement.

Gabe: Oohh, a side of disagreement, I like it. And of course, I’m a hypocrite. The biggest hypocrite in the room. I don’t want anybody to charge for a mental health speech except me. It’s kind of hard to get around that, right? I mean, if you want me to come speak at your venue right now, I’m going to send you a contract and you got to give me a stack of money. And I justify that by saying, well, hey, I’m not a multi-millionaire because I don’t have my own TV show. I think that there is some some justification in that. But where does it end? Like, how many speeches should I give for free versus how many are charged for? Because I do speak for free. I do volunteer. And the answer is, I don’t know. I don’t know. But it does rub me the wrong way. And when I saw BoJack Horseman talk about it on the show, it validated that because it shows that other people are seeing it that way, too. And this is cause for concern. And maybe we should make some changes. Maybe. Or maybe not. I don’t run the world.

Jackie: Gabe, if you’ve been listening to this, if you’ve listened to your speech, we know you’re not a bad guy. We just know you got bills to pay. Right?

Gabe: And these are hard conversations, right? I don’t get to decide. And that is one of the things that I do like about the world, that Gabe and Jackie don’t get to decide. But we do get to share our opinions, and I’d be interested in hearing what your opinions are. Jackie, what’s the e-mail? So people can tell me how wrong I am?

Jackie: Show@PsychCentral.com. Send hate mail with subject line to Gabe.

Gabe: Should we send like positive mail with subject line to Jackie?

Jackie: Absolutely.

Gabe: Thank you, everybody, for tuning in. Remember, wherever you download this podcast, rank it however you feel is appropriate and use your words, tell people why you like it. We would also love to come to your next event. Not Crazy travels well. Hit us up at show@PsychCentral.com and book us to do this live. Gabe and Jackie in person are a lot more fun than we are in your ears. We’ll see everybody next week.

Jackie: Have a good one.

Announcer: You’ve been listening to Not Crazy from Psych Central. For free mental health resources and online support groups, visit PsychCentral.com. Not Crazy’s official website is PsychCentral.com/NotCrazy. To work with Gabe, go to gabehoward.com. To work with Jackie, go to JackieZimmerman.co. Not Crazy travels well. Have Gabe and Jackie record an episode live at your next event. E-mail show@psychcentral.com for details. 

  Podcast: BoJack Horseman and Celebrity Mental Health Advocacy syndicated from

[biofunmy]

What Does Being Best Dressed Mean?

This weekend, the International Best-Dressed List was released — its 79th iteration, but the first under its new caretaker, Airmail, the Graydon Carter newsletter/zine. Did you notice?

Once upon a time the crowning of a new set of style royalty was so newsworthy that reporters from The Rocky Mountain News to The Daily Mail in England would vie for the scoop. And yet this year, the announcement that Cate Blanchett and Roger Federer had taken top honors, that Janelle Monáe, Zoë Kravitz, LeBron James and Zac Posen (among others — 30 in all, from 16 countries) had also been recognized, feels more anticlimactic than edge-of-the-seat anticipatory.

Despite our seeming unending appetite for “best of” lists (which this year has taken an even more extreme turn thanks to the end of the decade), all of them apparently read and pored over and shared until they trend on a variety of metrics, are we, actually, over the best-dressed list? The one that was among the first of them all?

I am beginning to think the answer is yes.

In our fractured world, where the individual has become ascendant and the digital sphere has elevated the obscure to the influential, where trends have devolved into everything you want all the time, and formality has become a choice rather than a professional diktat, the idea of an unnamed group of people ruling on who is “best dressed” seems increasingly as anachronistic as “no white after Labor Day.” (Tell that to Nancy Pelosi.)

“Best dressed” has become an empty term. This is a time of “viral dress” and “influential dress,” ideas that often have little do with the subjective value judgment attached to the word “best,” and which are measurable in some objective way.

But “best,” with all its implications of a certain elite and ineffable — what? style, good taste, elegance? — seems tied to another era, one in which a small group acted as gatekeepers of power, not to mention of social and cultural capital.

It is an era chronicled extensively in a book by Amy Fine Collins, a journalist who is herself in the Best-Dressed Hall of Fame, published earlier this fall by Rizzoli (and who is part of the governing body of the current International Best-Dressed List).

Though it is not the first book about the list — in 2004, Eleanor Lambert, the founder of the list, was a co-author of “Ultimate Style: The Best of the Best-Dressed List” — it is the most comprehensive.

“The International Best Dressed List: The Official Story” is filled with swanning, swooning pictures from the 1940s to today: of Babe Paley, Jackie Kennedy and Bianca Jagger; Sidney Poitier, Rihanna and Lady Gaga.

It also includes gossipy tidbits about how the list was made, how it evolved to reflect the society it chronicled, and a relatively convincing case for why, though it has been debated and dismissed and decried almost since its inception (in 1999 The New York Times called the list “absurdly quaint”), it is still going.

Founded in 1940 by Ms. Lambert, a publicist, as a scheme to draw attention to the American fashion industry, the best-dressed list aimed to celebrate both individual style and those who invested in a more classic elegance: the looks of singularities like Diana Vreeland and China Chow, as well as famous designer champions like C.Z. Guest and the Duchess of Windsor.

They were women (and latterly men) who went to the sort of events that were often photographed, thus putting them in a position to influence other people’s choices.

It has changed with the times, no question. Attempted to stay current. Diversified. Youthquaked. Celebrated celebrities who became style setters when, as Ms. Fine Collins said in an interview over tea at the Carlyle, “the fashion and entertainment industries began to converge.”

As you go through the decades, you see figures emerge on the list as they emerged on the pop culture scene: Mary Tyler Moore, Diahann Carroll, Rudolf Nureyev.

The list tried to fight against some of the worst evolutions in fashion. In 2003, after Ms. Lambert retired and “bequeathed” her invention to four editors — Mr. Carter, Ms. Fine Collins, Reinaldo Herrera and Aimée Bell — it moved, with some fanfare, to Vanity Fair.

At the time, Ms. Bell told The Times, “Those who are dressed by stylists are banned from the list.” (That notion obviously didn’t last long, since it would have taken every celeb off the table, which was not a tenable proposition for the magazine.)

But as much as it has changed and been, as Ms. Fine Collins said, “elastic and flexible and able to adapt to what is happening in the zeitgeist,” it has also relied largely on certain commonalities: access, privilege, the ability to go out a lot.

Even as it became more diverse, it became more diverse within certain very limited paradigms, chief among them fame and money.

And it has spawned an entire sector.

We can thank the International Best-Dressed List for Mr. Blackwell’s Worst-Dressed list, founded in 1964. For the fact that almost every magazine now has its own best-dressed list, including People (Best-Dressed Stars), GQ (Best-Dressed Men) and Sports Illustrated (Best-Dressed Athletes). For Vogue one-upping them all with Best-Dressed of the Week and for Vanity Fair further clouding the issue by continuing to curate its own best-dressed list even after Mr. Carter, Ms. Fine Collins and Ms. Bell left in 2017, Ms. Lambert’s list in hand.

For the Oscars and the Met gala getting their own best- and worst-dressed lists — multiple versions. For Roger Stone, the clotheshorse and political operative convicted of witness tampering and lying to Congress, creating his own: Mr. Stone’s Best and Worst Dressed List (presumably not anymore). For the fact that there is now a best-dressed list for pretty much anyone’s liking.

Indeed, if I were making a list, it would include, say, the women in white at the State of the Union. The woman in Sudan (also in white). The yellow vests. Billy Porter in a dress at the Oscars. Lizzo with her little bag. In other words, the moments in fashion this year when dress became a symbol of social and political change. But that’s me. You try! (It’s both a fun and difficult exercise.)

And though the caretakers of the International List claim theirs is the only true list, since it was the first, there’s nothing that says primogeniture equals ownership in this particular case.

Which is why, though the book was conceived in part as an argument that said list — the original one, with past and pedigree — can be seen as a mirror held up to society, a history in chiffon and silk, it functions less as a case for the list’s continued relevance than as a very well-accessorized memorial.

That’s why the unveiling of the latest iteration of the list seems like the echo of a coda to a symphony heard long ago.

After all, if there is one truism of today it is that everyone can take pictures of themselves in their bedrooms (or on the street or outside a space they may not actually have access to) and have their photos reach a million people — thus, potentially, changing how others dress.

And those people don’t need the approval of the insiders to do it. In fact, the lack of approval of insiders is part of their appeal.

“The International Best-Dressed List: The Official Story” By Amy Fine Collins

So if the International Best-Dressed List really is a reflection of the times, perhaps the only way for it to truly represent where we are now is for it to acknowledge its own natural, gorgeously appointed, demise.

Sahred From Source link Fashion and Style

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Podcast: Haunted Asylums – Stigmatizing or Just Entertainment?

Each Halloween we encounter the same debate: are haunted asylums stigmatizing or are they simply entertainment? While some may think haunted asylums are tasteless at worst, they don’t feel like they’re an actual detriment to the mental illness community. In this episode, we look at this argument from both sides and really dig into what happens when we use mental illness as a theme for entertainment.  While Jackie and Gabe both make great arguments, we toss this question back to you. 

Are you offended by haunted asylums or do you see them as harmless entertainment — or something in between? Listen now and decide for yourself.

(Transcript Available Below)

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About The Not Crazy Podcast Hosts

Gabe Howard is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations, available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from Gabe Howard. To learn more, please visit his website, gabehoward.com.

        Jackie Zimmerman has been in the patient advocacy game for over a decade and has established herself as an authority on chronic illness, patient-centric healthcare, and patient community building. She lives with multiple sclerosis, ulcerative colitis, and depression.

You can find her online at JackieZimmerman.co, Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

    Computer Generated Transcript for ‘Haunted Asylums’ Episode

Editor’s Note: Please be mindful that this transcript has been computer generated and therefore may contain inaccuracies and grammar errors. Thank you.

Announcer: You’re listening to Not Crazy, a Psych Central podcast. And here are your hosts, Jackie Zimmerman and Gabe Howard.

Jackie: Hello and welcome to Not Crazy. I’m here with my co-host, who is Gabe Howard. And this year for Halloween, he’s going as your friendly neighborhood bipolar beanstalk.

Gabe: I like being a bipolar beanstalk, and I am here with Jackie Zimmerman, who not only lives with depression, but when I invited her to my Halloween party, she said, “Oh, hell no, they’ll be kids there.”

Jackie: I don’t like kids. It’s not my thing. I hate kids.

Gabe: You are not required to like children. Now, as the audience has probably figured out, we’re doing a Halloween episode and we decided to take the most serious mental health advocacy point, one that always makes national headlines, big, massive organizations take this on to fight it. It’s a real serious thing in mental health advocacy.

Jackie: Is it that serious? I know we’re doing an episode on this, but is this really a thing that happens every year that people care about that much?

Gabe: Every year it makes national news, every year it makes the local news, the national news. It makes the paper. I read about this issue constantly.

Jackie: Whoa, whoa. You read the paper?

Gabe: I mean, online. I read the online paper.

Jackie: The digital?

Gabe: Google’s a paper, right?

Jackie: I read the digital paper.

Gabe: I read the digital paper.

Jackie: We’re talking about haunted asylums. And I have feelings.

Gabe: You have feelings on everything, and in a previous episode, you said that the best part about being a young blonde white woman is that you can be offended by everything. And it’s OK. Like, I genuinely and honestly feel like this is one of those things that is just not that big of a deal. It’s just not that offensive. I’m sorry. It’s not.

Jackie: You know, Gabe, first of all, I am offended by everything and I’m allowed to do that based on all the things that you said, but also because I have this lovely platform where I can tell people how offended I am and win them over. So in this scenario, I do think that haunted asylums are offensive, like the portrayal of mental illness in them. These subconscious things that they are giving to the people who attend them. I just don’t feel like they’re helping anything. What’s the point? What’s the point?

Gabe: I love that you said what’s the point? Because the point is not mental health advocacy. The point is to scare people. It’s a Halloween attraction. You plop down your 5, 10, 15, 20, 25 dollars because some of these things are just really elaborate and you go in to get scared. It’s fun. It’s a holiday. I just I understand that there’s a nuance. There’s a nuanced debate to be had here. And we’re not going to have it. But I’m sorry. I really just have a hard time believing that any rational or reasonable person thinks that a haunted asylum or haunted house with crazy psychos is an actual representation of mental illness. I’m sorry. I think that it is so over the top that it is obviously not anything except for a Halloween fun thing.

Jackie: I read a lot of articles about this because, of course, I did. And in those articles, there are various people who have attended these things and walked in and been massively triggered, first of all, by what was happening. There was one where this woman took her two small sons. She lives with mental illness. She’d been hospitalized. And they left and her sons asked her, “Is that what happened when you went into the hospital?” and she had to sort of undo what they just saw and teach them the correct things about her hospitalization. It’s not so much that I think people walk in and they go, oh, this is what happens to people with mental illness or this is what happens in the hospital. It’s more or less that what people are walking away with is that people with mental illness are dangerous. Right. And when they go to the hospital, all these dangerous things happen. If they take over or they become in control, they’ll chase me with chainsaws and they’ll come after you. And it’s like a subconscious thought process. I don’t think anybody leaves feeling in danger. I think it’s one more thing that society crams into our brains subconsciously that tells us to be afraid of people with mental illness.

Gabe: That is probably true. I honestly can’t think of anything that is untrue in that statement, except that it’s not society’s responsibility to make sure that every single person is not triggered or bothered or offended or I mean, sincerely, where does that end? I am from Ohio. You are from Michigan. I am offended by Michigan because of a football rivalry that started before my grandfather was born. I am offended. Listen, you don’t have to not be from Michigan or mention Michigan around me. And frankly, if I sincerely believe this, which I don’t, I’m not a crazy football person, although Michigan sucks, it is important to understand that if I actually treated you poorly, your response to that is not to make sure that you never mentioned your home state around me. It’s my response to like find a way to deal with this. And in your example, you actually said she took her children to a haunted house with violence and murder and had to explain to her young child. Really? Where is the responsibility on her? So murder is okay. Violence is okay. Haunted thing’s killing you and scaring you were okay. But she didn’t like the tie-in to mental health issues. Wow. Okay. Yeah. All right. Next.

Jackie: Ok. Fair point. I can’t argue with that point. I still think that there is some onus on the people who are setting up these haunted houses, haunted asylums, Cedar Fair, which is a company that owns like Cedar Point or some of these other really large amusement parks that do haunted things in October have started changing the names of them. It’s not so much what they are doing in them. It’s the names that they’re giving them a words matter, right. So calling it a haunted asylum or even like a haunted mental institution, some of these things have horrible names. They’re changing them to just haunted hospitals or hospitals. I don’t know other names that I don’t remember, but it’s taking away this part of it that is directed specifically at the mental illness community. And I think that’s really important because not only are they showing these really awful things that people are going mental illness. We’re talking about society here again, where society doesn’t know a lot about inpatient treatment. They know what they learn in movies and they know what they learn on television shows. This is one more thing that society sees in conjunction with inpatient treatment. And they just chug that in the back of their head and go, OK, well, this is what happens in inpatient facilities.

Gabe: You’re not wrong. 

Jackie: I know.

Gabe: There is misinformation everywhere. For example, on television, we see cars routinely driven off of the third floor parking garage, you land on the ground and keep going. That’s utter nonsense. We see movies where people get into fights and just get punched in the face like full power 20, 30 times. No problem. People get shot and they’re OK. It’s a flesh wound. Pop culture is not a good place to get information. It just isn’t. And this is an example of that. This is not a good place to get information. Why is that not the talking point? Why is the talking point not Americans are stupid and keep relying on fiction to get their facts?

Jackie: That is a talking point, I mean, again, you’re not wrong, but people are doing this, they are going to pop culture for information. How many times have people said, oh, I know about that, I saw it in Grey’s Anatomy or on House? People are learning from these shows. And again, it’s not so much the violence, which that’s like a whole other thing. It’s the representation of the mental illness community. This would never fly in cancer if you walked into a haunted house and there was an osteosarcoma patient on a table and somebody with a chainsaw was cutting their leg off. And then that person chased you around and was like, I’m going to cut your leg off because you have cancer. That wouldn’t happen. That doesn’t happen for any other illness other than mental illness.

Gabe: I’m going to disagree with you there because we’ve all seen the crazy surgeon. Huh, I guess crazy is in there. You’re right. I guess I guess mental illness is there

Gabe: Where they remove your brain.

Jackie: Point my team.

Gabe: Look what you did.

Jackie: And don’t you think to some extent that these representations of mental hospitals in these haunted asylums are scaring people away if they actually need treatment?

Gabe: There is where you’re going to win another point because yes, yes, I do. But let me ask you this, Jackie, on the side of mental asylums are offensive. Which do you think keeps more people away from treatment, haunted mental asylums or severe lack of funding and resources for people with mental illness?

Jackie: Well, obviously, I’m going to pick the resources, but that’s not the topic of this show, Gabe. 

Gabe: Of course not.

Jackie: We’re talking about haunted asylums.

Gabe: But I think that is the point, because haunted asylums make national news every single year, every single year, they become an advocacy point. But every single day in this country, every single day, somebody with mental illness will die because they don’t have resources. And it’s not. Oh, no, no, no, they are staying at home because the haunted asylums scared them. No, they are trying. Their families are trying. They are working desperately to get well, but they can’t get any single resources. And yet, strangely, hello, national media. Why aren’t we covering these people? We’re not.

ackie: I don’t know. Maybe it’s because the conversations we give people around mental illness have to do with things that they’ve learned in pop culture, in haunted asylums, where we don’t think that they deserve funding, they don’t deserve help because they’re all crazy and dangerous. They’re going to hurt everybody anyway.

Gabe: Let’s talk about that for a moment. I love that you walked right into that trap. So you believe this? Society believes that every single person with mental illness is dangerous and violent and a threat to us. And the response to that is to completely decimate the mental health safety net and just let them all walk around homeless, untracked, and consequence free. Now listen, I’m not saying that all people with mental illness are homeless. But I am saying that if society really believes, I mean, if society really believes that people with mental illness are responsible for all the violence, why are we doing so little to help them? You think maybe they don’t believe that? You think maybe that society doesn’t actually believe that?

Jackie: No, I think society doesn’t think about it. I don’t think that they care. There’s not a season for mental illness, right? There’s a season for Halloween. That’s why it makes the news, because it’s relevant and current. It also is a good headline. Mental illness as a whole. Lack of resources. Homelessness. All of these things happen all the time, year round. We’re completely desensitized to it. It’s not newsworthy anymore.

Gabe: I completely agree with that. I don’t know what that has to do with whether or not haunted asylums are offensive, but I can tell you that that is incredibly offensive to me. We have so many people who are in harm’s way that it’s not newsworthy anymore. But you’re right, haunted asylums are the problem. Let’s talk about that some more.

Jackie: I’m not saying haunted asylums are the entire problem. But you mentioned why is this not in the news more? Why are we talking about haunted asylums in the news? And this is why I’m not saying it’s right that we’re desensitized to it. In fact, I think it’s absolutely fucking terrible that we are desensitized to it. But we are. That’s why we’re here. That’s why nobody cares anymore about these terrible things that are happening to even people like veterans. Right. We’re supposed to really care about our veterans and we just don’t we don’t give a shit. But when something happens,

Gabe: Hey, hey, hey. That is not true. Every sporting event that I go to, we always stand for the veterans. Now we cut all their funding in the V.A. Hospitals have maggots in a bit, but no, every single sporting event, we always have a moment of silence. So don’t tell me that we don’t do enough for our veterans.

Jackie: Ok. Well, you know, you win that one, Gabe.

Gabe: But it is analogous, right? We have veterans that we are not giving enough resources to. That’s not making the news, but somebody kneels in front of a flag. Oh, my God. The veterans. The veterans. And again, I’m not trying to open up that debate. Please don’t. Just the things that we’re getting upset about. I don’t think are the root cause of the problem. I cannot get around the idea that haunted asylums have offensive parts to them and that they’re based on stereotypes and myths and things that aren’t true. I will give you that. You win. I just don’t think that this is a big advocacy point at all. Frankly, I can’t wait until I do, because as soon as I think that this is worth my time, it means everything else is resolved. All of this other stuff has been fixed and Gabe is thinking, well, shit, I have put a lot of time into becoming a mental health advocate. I don’t want to end my career, so. Yeah. Asylum’s, I guess.

Jackie: We’ll be right back after this message from our sponsor.

Announcer: Interested in learning about psychology and mental health from experts in the field? Give a listen to the Psych Central Podcast, hosted by Gabe Howard. Visit PsychCentral.com/Show or subscribe to The Psych Central Podcast on your favorite podcast player.

Announcer: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp.com. Secure, convenient, and affordable online counseling. Our counselors are licensed, accredited professionals. Anything you share is confidential. Schedule secure video or phone sessions, plus chat and text with your therapist whenever you feel it’s needed. A month of online therapy often costs less than a single traditional face to face session. Go to BetterHelp.com/PsychCentral and experience seven days of free therapy to see if online counseling is right for you. BetterHelp.com/PsychCentral.

Gabe: And we’re back debating haunted asylums.

Jackie: But doesn’t it bother you ever when people think about mental health, mental illness, treatment, the history of all of these things that some people think? Some of this stuff is still real when people talk to you about your treatment. Doesn’t it bother you that they think that lobotomies are still regularly practiced and all of these stereotypes that are perpetuated in the news, in the media, in haunted asylums?

Gabe: You know, it’s an interesting thing that you said, you said. Doesn’t it bother you that people think that it’s still true? Doesn’t it bother you that people think that this is still being done in hospitals? You recognize that? What you said is that at one point in American history, all of the stuff that’s currently happening in haunted asylums actually happened. They’re not based on false. They’re based on fact. They’re based on facts from the past. But they’re still based on facts. We lobotomized people with mental illness. You’re right. Now it is an attraction. And you know that’s kind of weird feeling, but

Jackie: Weird?

Gabe: I feel weird about a lot of things.

Jackie: Weird? It’s a weird feeling? Isn’t that like a terrible gut punch that people are using lobotomies and shock treatments for entertainment value?

Gabe: Yeah, but I don’t feel that way when I read a true crime novel or I watch Snapped or Forensic Files. I don’t feel that way when I watch Law & Order. And, you know, there’s two versions of that. One where they follow murderers around for our amusement. One where they follow rapists around for our amusement. Doesn’t that bother you, Jackie? Isn’t that just a big gut punch, that rape and murder is used for our entertainment? Oh, my God. So what, is mental illness special? Everything is exploited. Everything. Why is mental illness so special? What about all of these other awful things that happen? Listen, for real. Nothing that you said is wrong, but nothing that I have said is wrong. And I don’t know where the middle ground on that is. I am telling you, as a person who lives with severe and persistent mental illness, as a person who has been blamed for violence, as a person who has been fired from his job, as a person who has been discriminated against and stigmatized against and frankly just treated like shit because of an illness that I didn’t ask for. It’s a God awful, misunderstood illness. But I want to be very, very clear. Haunted asylums and haunted houses. Yeah, they didn’t factor in one iota to my suffering and spending any time trying to eradicate the haunted asylum problem. Yeah, it’s not gonna help Gabe Howard in any way. And truthfully, I don’t think it’s gonna help anybody in any way.

Jackie: I don’t know about that, Gabe. It might not help you personally, but what is the harm in erasing just the verbiage “haunted asylum” and turning it into “haunted hospital,” right? You’re right. We’re never going to erase the attraction to violence. We’re never going to have society go, this is all appalling. Let’s stop paying to go watch people get cut up on a table. It’s not going to happen. But what we can do, a very simple quick fix is removing the tie to mental illness and then walking away from it. You can choose whether or not you go in there, but they’re gonna advertise it on billboards. They’re gonna put it everywhere. They’re going to continue to subconsciously shove that information into your brain, whether you like it or not. And that goes for everybody else who sees that information..

Gabe: Why? Why is that reasonable? In general, when we see things in pop culture, we think, oh, that’s not going to happen. We all know that cars can’t do that. We all know that people can’t get shot and call it a flesh wound. We understand that there’s some differences there,

Jackie: Do we?

Gabe: But I really do think we do sincerely. I mean, honestly,

Jackie: I don’t.

Gabe: I just.

Jackie: I don’t know that I agree with you on that one. I think society as a whole are idiots and a lot of what we see in pop culture, in just general entertainment. Not that we look at and go, that’s real, Grand Theft Auto totally happens. But we have takeaways where they get, like I said, they get implanted in your brain and you just think that is a thing or that is reasonable or things like that could potentially happen.

Gabe: That’s probably true. And if we had a pop culture podcast, we would do a hell of an episode on it. Focusing in on using haunted asylums, the outrage about haunted asylums, to further our message, I just want to discuss why people believe this. Why can’t any of the articles go with, you know, in the not too distant past, this haunted asylum would have just been an asylum? We did do lobotomies. We did give people medication against their will. There is a lot of psychiatric trauma in the past of people with mental illness that we have to acknowledge. When I was first diagnosed, I honestly thought that the government was going to put me in a group home or store me away. I thought I was a disposable person, all because I heard the phrase, Sir, you have bipolar disorder. 

Jackie: I almost feel like you’re fighting on my side of this argument a little bit in your discussion about the past and what happened and how we need to talk about that. Those are the things that people are afraid of. They’re afraid of what happened in those hospitals. That’s why they’re using it as the basis for these haunted asylums. It’s scary. People go there to be scared. Yes, it’s dressed up now. And it’s almost comical how bad the costuming is. But the root of it is that these hospitals were scary. Mental illness is scary. We are gonna go there to see people who are going to scare us and we’re gonna leave going, man, that guy who is getting electroshock therapy, that was scary. And then we’re gonna move on with our lives. Nobody looks at it and goes, well, this is an unrealistic portrayal of what happened. And we know that this was a real history and we know that it was really terrible what we did to those people who had no say in their treatment plans. That doesn’t happen. All they leave with is that’s a scary thing. And what are we gonna have for dinner now?

Gabe: I don’t know what people actually leave with when they say, but let’s talk about another talking point that could come out of this. You’re buying a ticket to the Haunted Asylum because it scares you and it is a game for you. And you know that you’re free to leave. And the reason that you’re scared is because psychiatric care and mental illness is scary. If we can connect all those things together in the minds of every single person that buys a ticket, maybe they’ll have more compassion and understanding for people battling mental illness. Today, tomorrow and the next day, because you bought the ticket, because you’re scared of mental illness and you don’t live with it. You’re just a tourist. I live with it. That’s why I’m scared. And that’s why telling me to do yoga or go for a walk or commune with nature isn’t gonna work. Because at the end of the hour, I’m not done. I don’t get my picture taken. I don’t get a high. I survived bipolar. Anything. It’s not fake blood and fake tears and acting. It’s my life. And, yeah. It’s not done. As soon as November hits and I can, you know, celebrate Thanksgiving, that’s what I have all year round. I want there to be a better understanding of that or I want people to acknowledge that as complete and utter nonsense. And it’s just a way to have fun. And society exploits everything, to have fun and to make money. And in this way, they’re treating me like an equal. It’s very complex. And people don’t do well with nuance because I think even as people are listening to me like I don’t understand. Am I on Gabe’s side or Jackie’s side? There is no clear winner here. That is honestly how I see it.

Jackie: Some of what you just said, I don’t understand. I can’t fathom how you can say that and still think that it doesn’t matter that these things exist. Everything you just said about your experience, about the take away that is perpetuated by these terrible freakin’ places and it just makes me want to like choke you a little bit, like shake you. Gabe, you just proved my point in your sentence and then you unproved it two sentences later.

Gabe: I get that a lot. Yeah. I just don’t think we’re gonna make it go away. I don’t even think that’s a worthwhile goal worth trying.

Jackie: But it’s not unreasonable. There are stories about these haunted asylums and the other silly names that they use. The proprietors of these things, changing the names or removing scenes from them that perpetuate these terrible things. It’s not like this is an unattainable goal. This is a relatively simple thing that may or may not have a large impact. It may not change your daily life or my daily life, but it could change the lives of one or two people who maybe are too afraid to get treatment now, who have to explain this to their families. You wanted to change the conversation. I think removing these things helps us to change the conversation, because the conversation right now is this is what happens in mental hospitals.

Gabe: Yeah, Jackie, I don’t disagree. If all of the names were changed tomorrow, I don’t think that would be a bad thing. But I also don’t think it would be a good thing. I think it would be an irrelevant thing. I think it would just be a thing that happened. And that’s where I really get stuck on when I’m having this conversation year after year after year after year. You know what I’d actually like? I would like all of these haunted asylums to put up a sign. And I would like that sign to say this is fiction. This is a stereotypical portrayal designed to scare you. And the reason that it’s scary is because mental illness is a frightening disorder. And while we are providing this as entertainment only, you should take a moment to consider that people that live with these illnesses need resources and support that society may not be providing them. Please visit your local and then boom. Get a mental health charity to not sponsor but be there to hand out information or just have the brochure or the website or something. Hand out a little card when everybody leaves. I think that there is an opportunity to educate people with the correct information after they see the misinformation and places aren’t doing that. But instead we’re trying to erase our history. We’re trying to erase the part where we abused psychiatric patients. We’re trying to erase the part where we’re still abusing psychiatric patients. And these are just the things that I think about every October when all of these things make national news as if it’s, I don’t know, new.

Jackie: Gabe, that feels like a mic drop moment. I don’t think you won this. I don’t think I won this. But I am curious to see what the listeners think.

Gabe: And the listeners can e-mail us at show@PsychCentral.com and give us their opinions. Disagree with me. Disagree with Jackie. It’s okay. We want the conversation to continue. We also want you to stick around after the credits and listen to our hilarious outtake that’s put together by Lisa, our tortured editor, that does a great job putting these shows together. And also share us on social media, like us wherever you can find us. Tell all of your friends about us, wherever you download his podcast, give us a five star review and use your words. It helps raise us in the rankings and we will see everybody next week.

Jackie: See ya.

Announcer: You’ve been listening to Not Crazy from Psych Central. For free mental health resources and online support groups, visit PsychCentral.com. Not Crazy’s official website is PsychCentral.com/NotCrazy. To work with Gabe, go to GabeHoward.com. To work with Jackie, go to JackieZimmerman.co. Not Crazy travels well. Have Gabe and Jackie record an episode live at your next event. E-mail show@psychcentral.com for details. 

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College of DuPage Helps Juveniles in Detention at Illinois Youth Center Warrenville Earn College Credit

Glen Ellyn, Ill., Sept. 12, 2019 (GLOBE NEWSWIRE) — Six youth in secured care at IYC Warrenville began college this fall at College of DuPage. Through a longstanding partnership with COD, the youths are enrolled in five credit hours of courses this semester with additional offerings available in the spring.Access to education has the ability to change lives, Heidi Mueller, Director of the Department of Juvenile Justice, said.“Youth in the juvenile justice system need to believe that they have a future and the adults around them need to nurture that belief and see their potential as well. The faculty at COD dedicate their time to not only teaching these kids but to showing them they are worthy humans with exponential potential,” she said.The courses were piloted last year with a hybrid schedule of IYC Warrenville youth attending classes at their facility and on COD’s Glen Ellyn campus. Given the success of the pilot, this year students are taking all available courses—College Success Skills, Career Development, Short Stories and Speech—on the COD campus. Courses are taught by COD Manager of Student Life Chuck Steele, English Professor Jackie McGrath and Criminal Justice Professor Stacie Haen-Darden.Prior to the establishment of the program, the Illinois Department of Juvenile Justice (DJJ) did not have a post-secondary collegiate opportunity for the youth at IYC Warrenville, making it the only youth center in Illinois to not have an affiliation with a local college.Mueller said that through its partnership with COD, the DJJ is able to fulfill its vision of creating a prison-to-college pipeline for all youth centers under their jurisdiction.“At DJJ, we found ourselves with this sort of positive problem of increasing the number of youth graduating from high school while in our care—seeing that light and motivation turn on in them as they start to realize their potential—but not having a lot of post-secondary options for them. College of DuPage has provided them with the opportunity to continue on with education and has given them the confidence to reach for their hopes and dreams,” she said.COD Criminal Justice Professors Theo Darden and Stacie Haen-Darden were instrumental in forging the longstanding partnership between COD and IYC Warrenville that began more than a decade ago when former IYC Warrenville Superintendent Judy Davis sat on the College’s Criminal Justice Advisory Board.After years of COD criminal justice students volunteering at the youth center to gain professional experience, the idea of the college credit partnership program developed. Haen-Darden secured a Resource for Excellence Grant, funded by the COD Foundation to launch the pilot.Haen-Darden’s passion for this educational initiative stems from her belief that many kids who commit crimes come from broken backgrounds, but they can have a promising future if offered the right support.“Many times, kids commit crimes because of physical, sexual or emotional abuse they have encountered in their lives,” she said. “They haven’t come from a background rich with opportunities or resources to succeed. When incarcerated, they often don’t have the same access as everyone else to education—and the sad part is, many of them never did. When we look at rehabilitation, you can’t question that the more education you have, be it youth or adults, the less likely you are to re-offend.”The partnership between COD and IYC Warrenville is one of many efforts implemented by the DJJ to effectively reverse the school-to-prison pipeline. DJJ youth who participate in post-secondary education options have a statistically lower chance of re-offending and re-entering the system, Mueller said.“What’s so important about this particular program at COD is that it provides the youth not only with the educational instruction but with this normative experience of actually being able to go on campus and experience what college life is like,” she said. “Once our youth start to realize they are smart and that this path can be real for them, they become so incredibly focused and motivated.”One student who participated in the pilot called her experience at COD life changing.“These classes have taught me to love myself more and to understand the kind of person I am,” she said. “When something bad happens to you, or if you have been through a traumatic experience, this doesn’t mean that you get left behind. Just because we are or were in the system does not have to mean that we’re stuck in it. We have to make the decision to change paths and realize we’re important and we just need a guiding hand to lead the way. Sometimes I feel like I’m not college material, almost like I’m not smart enough, but now I know if I work hard enough, I can do it. I can do anything.”COD student Julia Rigney saw firsthand how important this opportunity was to the youth. Through her internship in COD’s Criminal Justice program, Rigney ran weekly study halls where she helped students with their homework and guided them through weekly journaling exercises. What she thought would simply be a resume builder turned out to be a life-formative experience, she said.“One of the most rewarding experiences that I had was watching the students excel and go from not believing they could go to college to wanting to pursue a college career,” she said. “Many of the students just need someone to believe in them and their ability to succeed. The most important lesson this experience has taught me is that we as a society cannot put a high enough value on human life.”The potential for this program is vast, IYC Warrenville Superintendent Tajudeen Ibrahim said.“We had a youth leave our care while school was in session, and they still participated in the college program from home—despite a long commute,” he said. “They wanted more knowledge and skills and, more importantly, they wanted to finish. We have kids who get a taste of college and continue in their pursuit of it after being released. That’s how powerful education is.”To prepare for the fall semester, Ibrahim and his staff took participating students to the COD Admissions office to tour the college campus before classes started.“We wanted to excite and motivate them,” he said. “We also wanted them to see the entire picture to help calm their fears. They were so excited to explore the connections and participate in on-campus activities. COD has been incredible to work with and we have to keep at this and keep the program going. The future of our youth is worth it.”Haen-Darden and her colleagues plan to seek more funding to expand the program.“In the future, nothing is off limits,” she said. “Starting small and slow was crucial because when you are really thinking about building a foundation, that’s what you need to do. We will build on this momentum so we have a rock-solid foundation to reach even more kids in need.”And while this program is still small and in its starting stages, Haen-Darden said it’s already making a positive impact on its students. After leaving the care of IYC Warrenville, two students who participated in the pilot are enrolled in traditional college this fall.“I plan on running with the opportunity,” one student said. “I have dreams and goals geared towards public policy and law. I want to help people less fortunate and give back to my disenfranchised community. I finally see the potential in myself that had been missing for so long. I feel transformed by this opportunity, and my family and my future family will be impacted by the COD Foundation’s generosity.”College of DuPage is regionally accredited by the Higher Learning Commission. Serving approximately 25,000 students each term, College of DuPage is the largest public community college in the state of Illinois. The College grants seven associate degrees and offers more than 170 career and technical certificates in over 50 areas of study. Attachmentiycwarrenville_newsJennifer Duda College of DuPage (630) 942-3097 dudajen@cod.edu

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Diet Doctor Podcast #3 – Dr. Jeffry Gerber and Ivor Cummins

Ivor Cummins: Great to be here, Bret.

Dr. Jeffry Gerber: Thanks, Bret.

Bret: The first thing I want to talk to you about is I learned from you guys you have to be very careful who you choose to write a book with. Because then you’re sort of stuck with that person, right? You guys are doing so much together, probably so many joint interviews, you are scheduled to talk together at the conference today and now we even have you sharing one microphone.

So maybe I want to ask you if you’re happy with your choice, but I don’t know if we want to talk about that right away, so instead talk to me a little bit about of what led up to your book “Eat rich, live long, the power of low-carb and keto for weight loss and great health”. Give me a little bit of the background. What inspired you to write this book and what led to it?

Ivor: Well, Jeff your history with low-carb goes back a lot longer, so maybe give your history first?

Jeffry: Yes, Brett, it actually ties into your original question. So I’ve been interested in nutrition for over 20 years. As you know, I am a family physician having done this for now 30 years almost and about 20 years ago I started to teach myself about nutrition after patients had approached me, family members approached me, I had some experience with losing 40 pounds on my own and just realized we didn’t learn much about nutrition in medical school.

You know we maybe had two hours or less and so like all of us we taught ourselves. And so it was about four or five years ago that I had met Ivor. I had a particular interest not only in nutrition but cardiovascular disease. And I always joke if it wasn’t for cholesterol we’d probably all be on a low-carb diet.

So at any rate, four years and a half years ago this chemical engineer out of nowhere puts up this video, “The cholesterol conundrum” and I immediately contacted this guy and I realized how connected we were that the engineer from one walk of life and the doctor from the other walk of life, our paths crossed at this opportune time and realizing that we were both focused on diet and cardiovascular risk and I had said back then to Ivor, we had done a little private video Skype and I said to the guy, “I think we need to collaborate”.

And you know he said, “What’s the happening?” and then he said to his wife, “Who is this crazy doctor from Colorado that wants to collaborate?” And so essentially this is what it’s turned into.

Bret: That’s fantastic.

Ivor: And the genesis of the cholesterol conundrum was around 2012 I got some very poor blood tests. I won’t go into details, but multiple doctors I consulted couldn’t really explain the two key things about any challenge.

You know, what’s the implication for mortality/morbidity and what are the root causes that would drive those blood metrics. And basically not getting any answers I began to research intensively on… within weeks I was on carbohydrate metabolism as the cause.

Bret: Yeah, we see it time and time again, someone has this personal experience that sends them on this is path of discovery and they end up with a low-carb diet as being such a powerful treatment for what they’re looking for and yet we were taught nothing of that. We were taught nothing of that in medical school and residency, so I’m amazed that you had been practicing this way for more than a decade.

And at that time these conferences like Low-Carb USA or Low-Carb Breckinridge didn’t exist. So how do you feel now when you come to a conference like this and they ask you or ask the crowd, “How many people are physicians?” and so many hands go up? I mean you must feel a little bit of pride in that.

Jeffry: Yeah, when I first got involved with it in the year 2000 I was on my own. And interestingly it wasn’t until I think 2005. Still on my own I had done my own research, reading medical journals, fascinated with the metabolic syndrome, understanding how that was a root cause, but in 2005 the first person I reached out to on social media was Jackie Eberstein, who was the nurse of Dr. Atkins.

And my hands were shaking, I somehow found her website, found her email and I thought that this person would never reply. And she replied right back and she was lovely, she was warm, she answered all my questions, so that was kind of the beginning. And, you know, the Internet social media was nothing back then, but slowly but surely it grew.

I connected with Jimmy Moore and we really have to give him credit, because if it wasn’t for him, I really don’t think this community would be as connected as we are. So to his credit as well I became a member of an obesity Society.

And it was funny back then, there were a lot of physicians and myself and Dr. Eric Westman would walk around the room and real quietly say to the other doctor, “I’m low-carb. Are you low-carb, doctor?” And you had to really like…

Bret: Keep it on the down low.

Jeffry: Keep it on the down low and slowly but surely it’s grown, Dr. Westman became the president of the society and that’s really helped to make, I think, physicians aware and, you know, we’ve just watched this blossom ever since. And Ivor and I both attended the summit in Cape Town South Africa from Tim Noakes. This was back in 2015. And we thought it would be a great idea to bring conferences to the United States.

So with my co-organizer Rod Taylor we have conferences in Colorado, we have one coming up next year in 2019 in March in Denver, and like you said it is just rewarding to see healthcare professionals attending these things, because honestly they are the guys, they’re the gatekeepers that need to learn this first. But we also love having the general public and these events that we’re at today really helped to bring everybody together and advance nutritional science.

Bret: Yeah, that’s so true and it seems like the doctors are catching on, but Ivor engineers are leading the way and that’s the fascinating part. And what I really like about most engineers, I can’t group you all into one, but in general the problem-solving skills in the way of thinking things as problem solvers is unique to the world of medicine unfortunately, but that’s sort of what we need and you talk a lot about the Pareto principle and you talk about sort of problem-solving metrics. So give us a little overview of how you think your approach to problems differ than the average physicians approach to health problems.

Ivor: Right, Bret. Well, essentially we use a lot of tools, systematic tools. So there is the Pareto principle, which is a rack and stack of the most important factors based on the evidence and that’s really important. Those comparative analysis, a tool called Kepner Tragoe, where you prosecute all of the distinctions between what the problem is and is not and then you record the inferences.

So it’s kind of like a little epidemiological. It’s looking at all the differences and what might cause them and that can become a very long list. And then there’s hypothesis for against charts, where you look at many hypothesis for a single problem. And we split up many, many hypothesis and they are constantly judged against each other based on the evidence for each individual one and against.

And there’s never any clarity early in a complex problem, especially a multifactor. So you have many, many hypotheses and they are pitched against each other. And that’s an enormously important discipline, which doesn’t really happen in medicine. Usually a hypothesis gains ground, becomes established, the orthodoxy get behind it and it kind of transcends into dogma. So there’s a huge difference.

And then statistical inference and design of experiments to test hypotheses is an automatic part of our life. An autopsy, so intense autopsy with electron microscopes and other tools to dig in and scrutinize the problem at a physical level. And again you don’t have so much of that medicine.

Bret: When I hear you go through this checklist and then I think in my mind how we write guidelines in medicine and they’re so polar opposite. I mean the guidelines are… you get a group of people together that do a sort of a cursory evaluation of the evidence, they come up with their best case scenario and their opinions of what the guidelines should be. That is a far cry from what you just described.

Ivor: And one crucial thing I’ll just add, there are many more tools, but also the experience of decades of using these tools… you less and less make mistakes or jump to conclusions through sheer experience. But a crucial one is to always look for black swans, for contradictory evidence against your hypothesis.

So that’s an enormous part of the time to resolution and success in engineering is you look for negative data that conflicts with your hypothesis and you rapidly kill incorrect hypotheses or you rewrite them to accommodate the conflicting data. And that’s just so central but I must say in nutritional medicine that’s the most extraordinary difference.

Confirmatory data is always looked for to build up more and more evidence to support a hypothesis, whereas one or two conflicting pieces of data could reset the whole team and get you back on the correct path doesn’t happen.

Jeffry: So we do have criteria in medicine that prove or disprove hypotheses. And that’s the Bradford Hill criteria, but we’ve set the bar so low that we don’t look at it like a scientist or an engineer looks at it.

Bret: Right and I wonder how many doctors are even aware of the Bradford Hill criteria. And when you’re interpreting an observational study that shows a relative risk of 1.18 and that makes it as causative, which, you know, that doesn’t even scratch the Bradford Hill criteria, I think it’s just an underused tool for sure.

Ivor: And actually another example of Bradford Hill that just springs to mind, there has to be directionality of dose-response. So cause X supposedly driving Y, as X increases, why should increase? But we have many examples including cholesterol and other things, whether is not a dose-response. Yes so Bradford Hill is excellent actually in principle, but it’s utilization is almost zero from what I’ve seen.

Bret: Let’s get into some of the specifics. So you talked about the dose-response, Ivor. And you spoke about that in your talk yesterday, specifically about coronary calcium score. So I know you’re a big proponent of the coronary calcium score. And one of the things you said was there are 17 studies I think you quoted where LDL does not correlate with the degree of coronary calcium score.

Ivor: Yeah, actually there’s a 2009 paper and a book publication I think in 15, can’t recall the author, but I think it’s closer to 20 and even includes familial hypercholesterolemia studies. And across the board with one exception in 19 studies, there’s a very slight correlation between prospective LDL and coronary calcium. Now coronary calcium is far and away the best metric of atherosclerosis extent and future risk. It beats all the risk factors together.

And it’s because it sees the actual disease process, the calcification that’s the response to injury for this inflammatory vascular disease. But it is interesting there’s almost no correlation with cholesterol metrics. Interest needed do highlight that insulin pops up several times, but not cholesterol.

So I think to engineers working on cholesterol, that and myriads other kind of negative pieces of evidence would’ve caused us to totally retool the cholesterol hypothesis very early in the prosecution of the problem-solving effort. And we have 50 years now where the negative evidence is essentially almost suppressed, but certainly ignored.

Jeffry: So it’s interesting… mainstream, half of the cardiologists think that the calcium score has a benefit, half of them don’t, but it’s interesting when you look at guidelines, they try to tack on calcium score with your AHA risk markers, and what we’re suggesting is that that’s not the right way to use the tools that use… just simply look at calcium score by itself, independent of cholesterol and what I can add is just clinically we see that LDL cholesterol LDL-P is all over the board and it doesn’t correlate with the calcium score.

And this is especially… so we see lots of patients who have been doing low-carb paleo diets and I had many over years where there are these cholesterol hyperresponders where they tend to high LDL-C, high LDL P and many of them have calcium scores of zero, a perfect score of zero, which gives you a 15 year warranty.

Bret: Let’s talk about that 15 year warranty for a second, because I have to be honest, I have a little bit of trouble with that term, because it almost implies the risk is zero. So I think we have to admit if you have a calcium score of zero, your risk of a cardiac event in the next 10 years is not zero. It’s very low, it’s between 1% and 2%, but it’s not zero. So I think that’s important to sort of clarifying the warranty.

Ivor: It’s really important to clarify and anyone that infers from the word warranty it’s zero is mistaking obviously. And the warranty I think there were two papers were warranty was used in the title of the publication and it probably is unfortunate. So one of the largest study showed just from memory that zero scoring middle-age people I think 12 years later at 99.6% were still alive. And high-scoring people 75.6 were still alive.

Now that’s an enormous difference in mortality. So although enormous, there’s no zero, and I think Jeff you probably agree that if you’re zero calcium, there are exceptions. On one end there are people with zero who have rapid progression of atherosclerosis and a soft plaque does rupture before there’s significant calcification to show up in the scan. I mean later you could look and probably find diffuse calcification, but not enough to register.

Interestingly on the other end of the scale there’s a small maybe 1% of people who have huge calcification and who don’t seem to have events and they appear to be the people where the protective effect of calcification, which is to protect the arteries when they’re inflamed, is so advanced and rapidly progressing that they actually end up with massive calcification but relatively stable arteries, they almost have a full metal jacket.

So I think those two corner cases around 1% at each end illustrate the protective nature of calcium, it’s a fantastic evolutionary process, it’s actually bone matrix, it’s identical to bone matrix formation, but of course people rapidly progressing may have their event before the calcification establishes. So around 1% events in the following 10 years for zero versus in your recent paper, Jeff, around 37% for high scores close to 1,000. People just need to see it’s not 100% perfect.

Bret: And that’s a great point to bring up though because I think we can fall into a trap of being sort of overly reassured with a score of zero. It’s not, “Your score is zero, see you later, you don’t have to worry about anything.” It’s, “Your score is zero, but now you’re on our radar screen to follow again to make sure there’s no progression.”

Jeffry: So one other point is criticism of the test is that it doesn’t visualize soft plaque. And when you look at the data first of all, so when your score goes from zero to 1,000, this is independent of whether you see soft plaque or not. If you have a zero score you still have a small chance of having an event.

Now the question is if you can visualize soft plaque, would that change your ability to predict risk for these people that have a low calcium score? So you can do a CTMR, you could do a CT angiogram and then you get to see the soft plaque. But in our experience it doesn’t change the data looking at a CT calcium by itself.

Bret: So Jeff, what do you think about the carotid intima media thickness as a surrogate for that? Obviously again we’re not talking about the specific site we’re concerned about and we’re not even talking about plaque so much. It’s just the thickness of the intima of the carotid artery, but something you can measure quickly without radiation that might be a decent surrogate marker for the soft plaque as well.

Jeffry: Yeah, so again you describe that nice… Well, the intima is just the lining of the wall of the artery and so I don’t know who created the technology, but what he tried to do was to age the blood vessel based on the thickness of the intima. And on literature review it really does not correlate with events and mortality. So it’s interesting, in our office we actually do the CIMT, because it comes along with a limited Doppler.

So the limited Doppler, we’re actually looking for plaque buildup within the lumen itself. And that perhaps is a surrogate test for say a coronary calcium score. It’s not quantifiable quite like a coronary calcium score. The idea is if you could image all the blood vessels in the body and look at the plaque burden, that would give you a great idea about overall risk. But we do like the calcium score, because it’s looking at those tiny little coronary arteries that, you know, you are at risk for heart attack and stroke. So CIMT doesn’t really correlate.

Bret: I’d like to see the rate of change study sort of like with the coronary calcium score that has a fast change or slow change, same for CIMT, and correlate that. I don’t know if the rate of change studies have been done quite as well.

Ivor: No not really. In fact there’s not much really linking CIMT impressively to future risk prediction. I mean it’s a useful tool to quantify and track, but it’s just very weak compared to calcium. Because as you say it’s surrogate in different vessel, there is operator variation, quite large, they have to pick the region, you know, with to mouse clicks.

And you can’t have people who have quite a large intimal thickening, but really have very stable arteries with no real vulnerable plaque and vice versa. It���s just the calcium is vastly better. You did mention an interesting point, the radiation, and I researched that myself out of interest because I often hear this, but machines nowadays are around 1 mSv, which is around the same as a bilateral mammogram. And if you look back at research in the past decades, Chernobyl and even Hiroshima and the nuclear accident in Brazil, the biggest civilian nuclear accident, they tracked the people who had much, much higher exposures than this. I mean much higher. And generally over decades no signal between them and controls. So I think the expert Douglas Boyd who invented the calcium scanner, I interviewed him the other day, he said that that risk is maybe one in 10,000 of some possibility, it’s theoretical for 41 mSv, it’s tiny and it really is a distraction from the topic of how powerful the scan is.

Bret: Yeah, that’s a great point about how we interpret the risk of radiation, because in medicine there’s this concept of ALARA, as low as reasonably acceptable, and it almost teaches us to think of it as a way… it doesn’t matters how high the radiation exposure is. What matters is how much is the test going to contribute to the care. And is it worth it for any amount of radiation exposure?

Certainly a one-time calcium score or following every five years or so. Where I get a little concerned is if someone wants to follow a calcium score every six months or everyone year, because we don’t have data to say that short-term of a progression on happens or what it means, but more of the longer term following. Would you agree with that statement?

Jeffry: Yeah. So interestingly I’ve been working with my hospital next-door, that they’ve had a 64 slice GE machine for quite some time, GE Optima, and last year they purchased the cardiac package. And I’ve been bugging them right next door, I said, “Hey, we got to get this thing set up for calcium scans.”

And I’ve learned a lot because I’ve sat in there with their radiologist, the radiology technician over lunch, we just sit down and just… fascinating stuff. And first of all there’s much less user input error when you do this calcium score. You know, they calibrate the machine and the machine does the calculation to measure the calcium.

And I actually have been looking at the studies. So the radiating dosage, so the effective radiation dosage… So the device puts out a certain amount of radiation, so it’ll measure in DLP units, and I think our machine is about 165 DLP.

So that is what the machine puts out and then you have to do a fudge factor calculation for the effective dosage. So there’s a chest factor. And when we do the calculation, our calcium score is… the millisieverts is about 1.2.

And so you know I’m watching that really carefully and there’s things that the technicians can do so they can make a smaller window and the idea is that really is a small dosage. And if you have a zero score you could probably say that you don’t need any more, but it is okay to track… you can track every 3 to 5 years, maybe sooner if people are concerned.

Bret: Yeah, especially if someone’s changed their lifestyle significantly and you want to see what impact that has. So yeah, I think that’s a pretty good summary of calcium score. Let’s transition to a second about… transition to weight loss.

Jeff, you talked about weight loss in your talk today and what is so interesting is a lot of people come to a low-carb diet for the purpose of weight loss. But would you say weight loss is the most important metric to follow?

Jeffry: No, not at all. So again as I mentioned earlier, my understanding of cardiovascular disease led me to the metabolic syndrome. And so I think why we’re here as engineers and doctors is we’re trying to understand how do treat and prevent chronic disease. And weight loss is just kind of a consequence of doing all this.

Bret: And so, Ivor, when we talk about the mechanisms of weight loss or the mechanisms of improving metabolic health, there’s the debate of the calories in calories out versus the carbohydrate insulin model or some combination thereof when you factor in psychological factors… How do you break down and say what is the reason why a low-carb diet works?

Ivor: Yeah, that’s the million-dollar question. So I will take a shot at it. I think that calories… there is a place for calories, there’s no question. It’s not like the CI-CO, that is simply eat less, move more, because the body is far more complex than that, with myriad hormonal control feedback loops. So I think the primary benefit of a low-carb diet actually is appetite control and management. It’s a really big factor.

So when I went on a low-carb diet, and I’m not speaking N=1, but it’s seen in studies and all over the place, ad lib. low-carb diets have beaten calorie controlled low-fat diets. And we see again and again that when you switch over from a glucose based metabolism to a more fat burning metabolism, appetite comes under your control. In my case it was striking. I was actually shocked within weeks of how I could blithely not have to eat when I didn’t want to.

So I think that’s one of the big factors. Now when your insulin is high and you are hyperinsulinemic, like probably the majority of American adults today, that will tend towards trapping fat and tend against the burning of your body fat, so that is another factor.

But I would say appetite control is the central linchpin with the metabolic advantage that’s being discussed and the lowering of insulin being another strong element, but it’s not fully quantified, I think that’s fair to say. What would you say, Jeff?

Jeffry: Yes, so there’s a lot of factor to consider that it’s not necessarily all insulin. There’s many hormones and signals such as leptin, the gut incretins, we have to all consider that when we are thinking about regulating appetite, but of course insulin is probably the master hormone involved. And when you consider that perhaps two thirds of the US population adults over age 45 are currently diabetic and prediabetic that when you treat them with carbohydrate restriction, you’re going to have most success.

Bret: And I think that’s a very good answer because we like to simplify things and almost to a fault, because we want to know, “Is it the calories in, calories out? Is it the carbohydrate insulin?” And the truth is it’s far more complex than that. That’s basically how I would summarize your answer, so I thank you for that. The next question though Jeff is I’m sure you see these patients all the time in your office that they come in with a stall.

And you can define the stall on different ways, but basically whatever metric they are following, whether it’s their weight loss, whether it’s their insulin sensitivity, it just plateaus and they get frustrated. What kind of advice can you give to people about your general approach? When you see a stall what do you think about… what are your sort of go to top two or three things to ask them to do?

Jeffry: Right, so if you’re insulin resistant you just respond rapidly, your appetite is controlled, you correct insulin resistance and the fat that is trapped in a damper behind insulin… it opens these insulin floodgates and energy just pours out from fat tissue. But what often happens and I mean I’m just thinking of a patient I saw last week… they never lost weight from the beginning even though they were markedly insulin resistant when we measured all the parameters.

This particular person was told by a trainer, “You have to eat 180 g of fat a day. No matter if you’re hungry or not hungry.” And she was heeding the advice and pumping in the fat. And nothing happened. I mean that’s just an extreme example, but the point is that what you are eating at the beginning is not going to be the same when you hit this plateau. And so guess what? Controlling appetite becomes most important. This is what I think about, the quantity of food that you consume, the calories the activity and then it trickles downhill. But we have to make people understand that the quantity of food is really important once you become more insulin sensitive.

Bret: Yeah, very good point. And now to tag onto that a little bit more, to go a little bit deeper into the specifics of the diet… Ivor, this one’s for you as a good Irishman… How does alcohol fit into the low-carb diet and the low-carb lifestyle?

Ivor: Rather well. No, actually alcohol, I think a glass or two of red wine a day is fine. You know, the beers are generally carby. I’ve heard beer described as liquid bread, which is a pretty good.

Bret: A good description.

Ivor: Yeah so I think generally alcohol… interestingly there are studies done in the 60s on humans and calorie controlled, calorie for calorie alcohol replacing carbohydrate led to a slight drop in weight. And then replacing carbohydrate back in instead of alcohol iso-calorific increased the weight again. So well alcohol is the fourth food group.

So we know the protein has the thermogenesis effect, so over 100 calories of protein you eat maybe 75 will fully get into your system and there’ll be losses for heat and fat and carbohydrate around 10% or 15% of losses. It appears alcohol as the fourth food group has losses also because of its metabolism.

But that’s just an amusing aside. I think the advice is, you know, moderate alcohol, particularly something like dry red wine is low in carbs, low in sugar and it’s a pleasurable social thing. But anyone who has any hint of an overindulgence nature, you know, maybe it’s best to avoid alcohol altogether. And drinking excessively will knock people out of ketosis and will lead to many other issues including their work performance and other things also.

Bret: I see it sort of the same way as trying to decide what’s the mechanism of weight loss. Well, you also have to factor in the psychological components of what you eat. So with alcohol how it affects your liver, how it affects your ketone production, but also the psychological aspects of alcohol. Because let’s be honest, we don’t make the best decisions once we’ve had a couple of drinks so we have to factor that in as well, beyond the physiological effects.

Ivor: That’s a really, really important point… I wish I’d remembered to mention. Absolutely, when under the effects of alcohol that’s often where you will do your cheats. You will recharge your hands, you will eat things you would never eat without being slightly affected by alcohol. So that indirect way can certainly lead to failures.

Bret: Let’s talk about your book for a second. It’s a fantastic book, very detailed with great recipes, great scientific descriptions of why this works and how this works and some very practical tips. Can you share with us maybe one of the stories in this book that really jumped out at you, that’s a motivating story for you and your patients?

Jeffry: One particular female who was here last year at the conference had come in to see us… It’s actually a typical story. She was… Actually I’d say it’s not a typical story, it’s an atypical story… So this patient had been going to the diabetes Center in Denver for many, many years and her weight kept going up and up, diabetes was out-of-control, taking more and more insulin.

And it was her partner that had brought to her attention the low-carb diet. So she was very frustrated at this point. And so on their own as a couple they pursued low-carb diet.

Bret: On their own, not recommended by the Diabetes Center, not recommended by any physician.

Jeffry: Absolutely on their own. And by the time they had come to see me she was already losing some weight. And to make the long story short, her A1c was in the range of 12 to 13.

Bret: Wow, that’s high!

Jeffry: She got off insulin, she got off all medication and presently… And it was funny because as we were writing the book, she kept losing more and more weight so we had to update… We had to keep updating the book.

Bret: What a great story!

Jeffry: Yeah. So as of today, and this is probably maybe two years now, she lost over 100 pounds, I believe it’s almost half her body weight. And her A1c is 5 or 5.2.

Bret: From 12 to 5.2 getting off her medications.

Jeffry: Yes.

Bret: That’s a great story.

Jeffry: And you know she went to the elite diabetes center in town and they couldn’t help her.

Bret: Wow! So not your average case, not your standard case, but certainly shows the power that this can manifest in the frustration, that it wouldn’t be discussed in an elite diabetes center. Now do you see that trend changing with the evidence from Virta health in a peer-reviewed journal that we can get people off their medications? You know, it’s not doctors around town or N=1 stories telling their experience. Now it’s a published article. So do you see the tide changing for that?

Jeffry: Again I’ve been at it for almost 20 years and it’s much slower than I would like, but again we can do it one-on-one, but that’s not going to give us that global message that we’re looking for. So you know hopefully we can infiltrate the ADA meetings, the American Heart Association meetings and bring the evidence to the table in that way and change the tide.

Bret: So what’s next for you guys? Ivor, what’s next on your plate?

Ivor: Well for me it’s mostly conferences in the next few months where we’ll be obviously sharing the book and circulating that. I’m in Glasgow for a British cardiovascular society, I’m in Majorca for Low-Carb Majorca, Low-Carb Houston is on, Estonia has popped up for September, just a kind of health conference there and possibly Cuba in December, a diabetes conference, not low-carb but diabetes and health. And actually quite a few more heading into next year.

Bret: That’s great to hear that it’s a diabetes conference in there, cardiovascular conference in there, so not just low-carb conferences.

Ivor: Well, actually my supporter, and I kind of report to David Bobbitt now of Irish Heart Disease Awareness and we certainly share the focus on getting the message out to wider communities because I think within the low-carb community our obsession is giving people the chance to discover their heart disease with the calcium scan and giving them the solutions which include low-carb, but obviously low-carb is only one part of the multifactor solution.

But the challenges that people within the low-carb community have a good idea for a lot of the science and they are quite ahead of the game and they are even now learning a lot about the calcification scan through our efforts and others. But the huge majority of people are outside the low-carb community.

So it’s really vital for us to get to ordinary people, I mean those people at 52 or 53 of age that are going to drop dead of a heart attack and leave children behind and they are not obese and they don’t smoke, but they have hyperinsulinemia unknown, undiagnosed, they have huge vascular disease that’s going to kill them, but no one gave them a scan to wake them up. So our fixation is to get to those people. So I agree any conferences that are not just low-carb are our primary target.

Bret: That’s a very good point. I love how you brought up that the low-carb is one part of the solution and is so important to emphasize. And in your book you do put a strong emphasis on sun exposure and sleep and stress and physical activities and you have your list of 10 factors and I think that’s really important to fall back on, that we focus so much on diet because it’s something we’re involved in every day and we have such an intimate relationship with food and it’s so complex. But it’s one piece of the puzzle so I’m glad you brought that up.

Ivor: Yeah absolutely, Bret, and again just thinking back to the Pareto principle, people say that heart disease has 300 factors now. It’s apparently 300 that are listed. But obviously by the Pareto principle the top 5 or 10 will account for a huge amount of the disease on mortality and people can’t focus on everything.

So it’s very confusing to tell people too many factors including many lesser ones. And cholesterol can suffer from this problem as well, that is not a primary central factor, it’s an interacting factor. But we like to focus on the top ones, the Big Bang for the book that will save most people.

Bret: Good point. And Dr. Gerber, what’s next for you?

Jeffry: Yes, so I don’t go to as many conferences as Ivor, because I still have my day job as a family doctor and that takes up most of my time. And I have to say, you know, almost 30 years doing it I still enjoy it. There’s passion and helping to take people off medication and giving them tools where they can really make changes is really helpful.

But just a backup in terms of conferences, Ivor and I did attend a really important and interesting conference in Zürich. It was put on by the BMJ and Swiss RE. And the purpose of that conference was consensus. So we actually had the two sides come together and I’m a person of moderation and so trying to find consensus and this was just wonderful. And we hope that we could see more conferences like that into the future. So I pick and choose the conferences that I attend, I’m busy with our Denver conference that is coming up in March 2019 and we’re always looking for interesting topics, keeping it fresh.

We have some of the returned regular speakers and then to find new speakers. And so our mantra for our conferences is that these are for doctors put on by doctors, so we offer educational credit and everyone else is invited.

Bret: That’s great, very good. Dr. Jeffry Gerber, Denver’s Diet Doctor, thank you so much for joining me. Ivor Cummins, fatemperor.com, thank you so much for joining me.

Ivor: Thanks a lot, Bret.

Jeffry: Thanks.

Transcript pdf

Source: https://www.dietdoctor.com/diet-doctor-podcast-with-dr-jeffry-gerber-and-ivor-cummins

[yasbxxgie]

Spike Lee’s Malcolm X is one of the towering cinematic achievements of the 1990s. The dramatic retelling of the life and history of Malcolm X is Lee’s crown jewel and one of the most acclaimed performances of actor Denzel Washington’s career. Twenty-five years later, its subject matter is just as timely as ever. And the story of its making is particularly resonant in a time when black stories are being rolled out on the big and small screens at a rate that we haven’t seen since, well…25 years ago.

The film’s history is famously complicated. There had been talk of a film about the life of Malcolm X since the late 1960s, when producer Marvin Worth secured the movie rights to his autobiography from Malcolm’s widow Betty Shabazz and author Alex Haley. Worth recruited James Baldwin to pen a screenplay. The experience proved ultimately fruitless and frustrating for Baldwin. Malcolm’s associates were pressuring Baldwin to deliver their version of Malcolm’s story, while the movie producers wanted to see their version on the page. Struggling with his own emotional burnout in the wake of the assassination of Martin Luther King, Jr., Baldwin was finding it hard to get this script going.

Blacklisted screenwriter Arnold Perl was brought in to assist with the screenplay, which was overlong and lacked a clear ending—largely due to Baldwin’s concerns about the Nation of Islam. But Baldwin was chiefly frustrated by Columbia Pictures’ machinations; he felt the white filmmakers were all-too-eager to levy blame at the Nation of Islam for Malcolm’s death as a way of softening the racism he’d suffered at the hands of whites. Vowing to never repeat the experience, Baldwin ultimately departed the film in the early 1970s. He would release his version of the script as the book One Day When I Was Lost in 1972.

For almost twenty years, Warner Bros (who’d gotten the rights after Columbia dumped the project) attempted to revisit the Malcolm X screenplay. David Bradley, Charles Fuller and David Mamet were considered for revisions to the script. There was talk of Sidney Lumet directing, and Eddie Murphy and Richard Pryor were considered for principle roles. But nothing really materialized until Norman Jewison (In the Heat of the Night) was named as a likely director for the revamped project in the late 1980s. Spike Lee, a critical darling following acclaimed films like She’s Gotta Have It and School Daze, was particularly vocal in his criticism of a white director helming a film about the life of Malcolm X. A letter-writing campaign ensued against Jewison directing (Lee denied that he had anything to do with it.)

“I had problems with a white director directing this film,” Lee told the Los Angeles Times in 1992. “Unless you are black, you do not know what it means to be a black person in this country.”

The backlash against Jewison galvanized Lee’s campaign to direct the movie himself, noting that many affiliated with Malcolm wouldn’t have been comfortable sharing stories with white filmmakers.

“These people are very leery of opening up to white directors,” Lee also stated at the time. “Most black people are suspicious of white people and their motives. That's just reality.”

Lee’s bravado had become something of a hallmark for the director; he was now fully centered in the pop culture conversation following the success of 1989’s Do the Right Thing, and was being lauded as leader of a vanguard of new black filmmakers looking to stake their claim in cinema. Lee would be named director of the forthcoming film, but it wasn’t hailed as a victory for black filmmakers at the time. Quite the contrary, many elder civil rights leaders had a problem with Hollywood’s trendy new Negro filmmaker taking over the movie. One of the most vocal critics was Amiri Baraka, who felt that Spike would exploit the story of Malcolm X.

“We will not let Malcolm X’s life be trashed to make middle-class Negroes sleep easier,” Baraka famously said, criticizing Lee’s previous work as stereotypical. “People ask me, ‘Why you messing with Spike?’ Spike Lee is part of a retrograde movement in this country.”

Betty Shabazz served as a consultant to Lee on the movie and voiced her support for the director and expressed understanding of his critics. “Just because Spike Lee is doing a film, don’t mean he owns Malcolm,” Shabazz pointed out in the months prior to its release.

The pervading idea was that Spike Lee was going to make the Malcolm X movie that Hollywood wanted him to make. The apprehension was understandable, and after learning that Oscar-winner Denzel Washington would be playing the lead (he’d been cast by Jewison while he was still affiliated with the film), there seemed to be further evidence of Malcolm’s mainstreaming.

But the skepticism proved to be somewhat unfounded once the cameras started rolling. Lee brought a devotion and fervor to the project that led to clashes with Warner Bros. Most notably, his demand of a $33 million budget was reduced to $25 million as the studio balked at the idea of flying Washington and a crew to Mecca and Cairo to film scenes depicting Malcolm’s hajj. The studio wanted the scenes to be filmed in Arizona to cut costs; Lee stood his ground and the crew was able to film in The Holy City, becoming the first-ever non-documentary (and American film) to do so.

“What we really want to put out is what we feel is the true image of Malcolm because there have been so many misconceptions of what he stood for—Malcolm X hated white people, Malcolm X promoted violence, Malcolm X this, Malcolm X that.”

“A lot of people's perceptions [about Malcolm X)] came about by the media,” Lee said, adding that, “Malcolm X scared not only white people but many blacks of his generation as well.”

But the ballooning cost led to a clash between Lee and Completion Bond Company, which had assumed costs midway through production. The bond company declared that the movie would not be longer than 2 hours 15 minutes and explained that Warner Bros. would not provide any additional funding. Lee famously fought to finish the movie as he saw it; and money was donated by luminaries such as Prince, Oprah Winfrey, Michael Jordan, Magic Johnson, Janet Jackson, Duke Ellington School of the Arts founder Peggy Cooper Cafritz, and Lee himself.

The film would be released on Nov. 18, 1992. Spike Lee’s Malcolm X is a cinematic tour-de-force; a layered, gorgeous examination of a man’s complex and powerful life—with a towering performance from Denzel Washington, as well as Angela Bassett as Betty Shabazz and Delroy Lindo as Malcolm’s mentor in crime from his early days in Harlem. Lee’s typical heavy-handedness is decidedly muted in X; there’s a grace that belies his reverence for the material, even while opening the film with footage from the then-current and still-relevant Rodney King beating of 1991.

Lee famously urged students to skip school to see the movie upon its release; and drew heavy criticism when he said he only wanted to be interviewed by black media. Lee’s audaciousness has always been a gift and a curse, but in the tense aftermath of the L.A. riots and with an election year swirling, his approach seemed to amplify an ongoing conversation about race and racism that American still wrestles with 25 years later. And it definitely rankled people in high places.

The movie was famously snubbed at the 1993 Academy Awards. Washington received a nomination for Best Actor, but the film was not nominated for Best Picture nor was Lee for Best Director. Washington would lose Best Actor to Al Pacino for Scent of A Woman.

In fighting to make the film that he wanted to make—from his anti-Jewison campaign to his move to land outside funding—Lee upended the standard operating procedure Hollywood tended to exercise when making black films. Even when looking at some of the movies that have come in the years since X, it’s obvious that black period pieces are given limited room to be fully realized. Major studio biopics like Get on Up (about the life and career of James Brown) and 42 (about baseball legend Jackie Robinson) are rarely given the kind of funding that is granted to films such as Lincoln or Walk the Line. For X to be made the right way, it needed someone willing to fight against that. And in the end, the film was stronger for it—as was black filmmaking.

Even today, Malcolm X feels like the crescendo of sorts for the wave of black filmmaking that had come to the fore in the late 1980s/early 1990s. Beginning with Lee’s She’s Gotta Have It in 1986, a generation of rebel filmmakers that also included Keenan Ivory Wayans, John Singleton, Julie Dash, Reginald Hudlin, Robert Townsend, Matty Rich and the Hughes Brothers had redefined what it meant to tell black stories onscreen. Ambitious films like Jungle Fever and more modest successes like The Five Heartbeats had become standard-bearers of black cinema—some with mainstream co-signs and some without.

In Lee’s sprawling, ambitious biopic, filmgoers were given a black cinematic epic; it covers decades in the man’s life while also highlighting the black American experience from the ‘40s to the ‘60s. The great cultural awakening of black people over that same period of time is embodied in Malcolm’s life experiences—from rural and impoverished, to urban and disenfranchised, imprisonment and enlightenment. In the story of one man finding his purpose, Spike Lee gave us the story of a people finding their voice.

[brentrogers]

Podcast: Sex Addiction, Hypersexuality, and Mental Illness

  Sex addict. Nympho. You’ve likely heard these words used for a person with hypersexuality, but what exactly is this condition? Is hypersexuality really a symptom of a mental disorder or is it just a super high libido? Where does one draw the line between liking (or loving) sex and being hypersexual? Is it similar to a drug addiction? Or a binge eating disorder? 

Join Gabe and Jackie as they tackle this often misunderstood topic and hear Gabe’s own personal experiences with hypersexuality as a debilitating symptom of his bipolar disorder.

(Transcript Available Below)

SUBSCRIBE & REVIEW

About The Not Crazy Podcast Hosts

Gabe Howard is an award-winning writer and speaker who lives with bipolar disorder. He is the author of the popular book, Mental Illness is an Asshole and other Observations, available from Amazon; signed copies are also available directly from Gabe Howard. To learn more, please visit his website, gabehoward.com.

        Jackie Zimmerman has been in the patient advocacy game for over a decade and has established herself as an authority on chronic illness, patient-centric healthcare, and patient community building. She lives with multiple sclerosis, ulcerative colitis, and depression.

You can find her online at JackieZimmerman.co, Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn.

    Computer Generated Transcript for “Sex Addiction” Episode

Editor’s Note: Please be mindful that this transcript has been computer-generated and therefore may contain inaccuracies and grammar errors. Thank you.

Announcer: You’re listening to Not Crazy, a Psych Central podcast. And here are your hosts, Jackie Zimmerman and Gabe Howard.

Jackie: Hello and welcome to this week’s Not Crazy. I would like to introduce my co-host, Gabe, who you may not know also twilights as a Santa Claus.

Gabe: And I would like to introduce my co-host, Jackie Zimmerman, who I just realized had multiple sclerosis. She always said that she had M.S. and I just assumed that it stood for Microsoft by the way she described it as horrible.

Jackie: Oh, that was terrible.

Gabe: I think it’s like a “dad joke.”

Jackie: Terrible. 

Gabe: Right. No,

Jackie: Well.

Gabe: No, you don’t like it.

Jackie: Well,

Gabe: I mean, it’s a little bit funny.

Jackie: It’s really not that funny. But you know what? We’ll go with it. And both of us forgot to say, you are bipolar. I have depression. So we’ll just throw that one out there as well.

Gabe: Yeah. Yeah. And to be fair, I am bipolar and you are depression.

Jackie: I am depression. I am. I am a little rain cloud with eyeballs wandering around, raining on people

Gabe: I love it.

Jackie: This week. Gabe, we’re talking about sex.

Gabe: Let’s talk about sex, baby. Let’s talk about you

Jackie: That was my first concert.

Gabe: And me.

Jackie: For the record, I was eight.

Gabe: Really? Salt-N-Pepa?

Jackie: That is not Salt-N-Pepa.

Gabe: Yeah, it is.

Jackie: I’m thinking of somebody else.

Gabe: Wow. Wow.

Jackie: We probably should cut that.

Gabe: No, no, no, we’re leaving it. We’re leaving it in.

Jackie: Damn.

Gabe: That’s in hard. Actually, that just became the outtake.

Jackie: I was thinking of I Want To Sex You Up, Color Me Badd.

Gabe: Oh, my God. You went from a group of strong, powerful black women to an awful group that nobody remembers.

Jackie: I remember them.

Gabe: You’re pushing it. You’re pushing it good.

Jackie: Ah, push it. Anyway. OK. This week we are talking about sex.

Gabe: And specifically hypersexuality. And there is this notion that sex and hypersexuality are the same thing and they are. I mean, they have things in common, but it’s a little bit like describing like a late spring rain and a hurricane as the same thing. There’s a world of difference and I don’t think people really understand that.

Jackie: I think that I don’t understand that. I will be candid that this is not a thing that I have experienced, and honestly, all that I know is these celebrities in the news who get caught cheating on their wives and they claim hypersexuality. And I don’t know. Is that true? Like, at what point do you claim, like, I’m a terrible person who’s cheating on my wife and or I have this actual addiction to sex?

Gabe: So there’s a couple of things that I want to point out there. First, this is where it gets really tough, right, to say to somebody, I don’t believe you. When they say that they have an addiction or a mental illness, like that’s dangerous, right? It’s just dangerous. I don’t know that I want to live in a world where when somebody says I’m having a mental health crisis or I’m addicted and I need help, we want to say, oh, bullshit, you just got caught and now you’re trying to weasel out of it.

Jackie: Ok, so let’s talk about this, let’s help me understand this, but also maybe help some people out there who are feeling maybe that they are living in the hypersexuality realm, but don’t know it or don’t know what to do about it. How do you know you have like an addiction to sex and you’re not just somebody who really enjoys sex?

Gabe: So full disclosure, I’ve had hypersexuality, I had hypersexuality for a long period of time. I’m also somebody with a high sex drive who enjoys having a lot of sex. And let me tell you what the biggest difference is between those two things. Wanting to have a lot of sex is very enjoyable. Sex is nice. We should just say it like it is. Sex is nice. I like having sex. People like having sex. Hypersexuality is not nice. It’s horrific. It’s an addiction. It’s a compulsion. You have to do it. There is no choice. It has to be done. It has to be done. Enjoying it is not even a factor in hypersexuality. It’s all about completing the act. The end.

Jackie: That is a sincere move because it sounds like it takes this really fun thing and makes it really un-fun, and I would imagine that can have some pretty negative effects on your life.

Gabe: It can have very negative effects on everything around you, right? Let’s go back to your celebrity example. One of the things that we noticed, like in the celebrities who get caught and then they have the addiction or they’ve had hypersexuality is one, they’re always men. We’ve never heard about females having hypersexuality or addiction in the public space. And that’s not realistic. Women do, in fact, suffer from hypersexuality. That’s like thing number one, right. Thing number two, after they get caught, you look back at their pattern and it’s always like high end scotch. Right. It’s a little bit difficult to be addicted to alcohol when somebody offers you a beer and you’re like, no, no, no, no. Oh, wait. I’m going to wait for the high end scotch. And then when you get caught drinking the high end scotch, like, oh, my God, I’m an addict. Well, but you went days at a time without drinking while pursuing high end scotch. And then when you found high end scotch, yeah, you locked yourself in the bar for the weekend, but then you were cool for another couple of weeks. Like this is a pattern that like doesn’t jive in addiction circles, but we’re kind of accepting it as the examples of hypersexuality. And these are some things that we have to be careful of. Right. Because if we tend to think of hypersexuality as having a lot of like really good sex. This is where I’m going to burst your bubble and freak everybody out. Hypersexuality often looks like chronic masturbation.

Jackie: Wow, I’m learning so much about you, Gabe.

Gabe: It’s a thing. It’s uncomfortable, right? But, Jackie, be honest and I’m not trying to put you on the spot until this moment. Did you honestly believe that I didn’t masturbate? Is that something that you think about the world when you look out at the world? Are you so naive that you’re like, no, nobody masturbates? We only make love to our partners and dedicated? No, nobody believes this. Nobody believes this yet, for whatever reason. Everybody thinks this is true, even though they know that it’s not true. And that’s sort of where hypersexuality causes a lot of problems. It butts up against what we actually know and what we’ve convinced ourselves is true. What we actually know is that people like sex. People have a lot of sex, that people desire sex. What we want to believe is that sex is only done in a committed and loving relationship and only for the purposes of procreation and putting another beautiful child into the world. It’s nonsense. It’s all nonsense. But it persists and it makes people who suffer from hypersexuality feel awful.

Jackie: So as someone who has not experienced this, I find this all to be fascinating and I have so many questions about it and what it means in your life, in your relationship and all of these things. So can I just like rapid fire questions at you?

Gabe: Hit me, hit me. We have a podcast, you know that right?

Jackie: Ok, so someone who is experiencing hypersexuality, are we talking like daily, hourly? What would quench the hypersexuality thirst?

Gabe: Nothing. Nothing. It’s going to be a little bit different for everybody. So for me at 27 times in one day didn’t do it. And those 27 times were comprised of partners, sex workers and masturbation. And at the end of the day, I did sleep like I was able to fall asleep. But when I woke up the next day, some, you know, 12, 13, 14 hours later, I don’t quite remember how long I slept. Yeah, I was right back at it.

Jackie: But is this like other addictions, whether it be to like drugs or food, even where it is all you think about you’re planning the day you’re having a fix, you’re planning your next one. Like you were saying, it is all encompassing, consuming all of your thoughts.

Gabe: Yes. Yes. It is the reason that you are alive and you are willing to do anything to meet the need. While I was in the act of satisfying hypersexuality, I was thinking about how I was gonna do it again while I was having sex. I was trying to figure out who I was going to have sex with next. I would masturbate on the way to having sex with somebody. It was uncontrollable. I’ve quit jobs. I’ve spent ridiculous amounts of money. My wife left me because I had a symptom of an illness. And that’s something that’s worthy of talking about too, like, isn’t it? You know, in sickness and in health. Like, could you imagine if I had cancer and she left me because of a cancer symptom? But back to the celebrities. People think that it’s bullshit and there’s no test. I can’t prove it. I can’t be like, no, no, no. I cheated on you because I had hypersexuality. Look, here’s the bloodwork. It sounds like an excuse. And I want to be very clear. I don’t blame my first wife for leaving me at all. I’d have left me, too. It’s that misunderstood. But I do want to focus the audience on it is a symptom. It’s an addiction. It’s a compulsion. It’s this horrible thing that’s happening to you. And as soon as it becomes public, the response from everybody around you is to call you a bad person and leave. Which means they’re probably not showing up with any help.

Jackie: Well, I would argue that’s the general response to any addiction. Honestly, I mean, not many people handle those situations very well. So in this scenario, with your first wife or with anybody, anybody in your life, really, how do you explain this to people?

Gabe: It’s very difficult to explain something that you don’t fully understand in the throes of hypersexuality. I didn’t know I completely agreed with my wife. I was a bad person who cheated on her. The end.

Jackie: Is this something that you talked to like a therapist about or is this self-diagnosed?

Gabe: I think that all illnesses are originally self diagnosed, right? There’s a reason that you go to the doctor. You think something is wrong and then you ask the doctor to fix it. You know, when we’re talking about like physical things, it’s a little easier. I’m having a headache. I’m too tired. I have this rash. I want to go away in mental health. We’re trained by society to deal with it ourselves. I’m sad. Man up. I’m anxious. Don’t be a wuss. I’m manic. Calm down. Why are you acting this way? When I was having all of this sex. This is my favorite line in this whole podcast. I’m telling you right now, I wasn’t just having a lot of sex. No, no, no, no, no. I was sowing my wild oats.

Jackie: Oh, barf.

Gabe: And that’s what I believed too. I believed that eventually I would get my shit together and stop. Also, not for nothing, young, manic Gabe, who felt like he was king of the world, having a lot of sex, especially with a lot of different women. Yeah. It made me feel powerful and mania made me feel powerful. It’s weird. Even me who knows the horrors of hypersexuality still thinks man, I wish I could get a fraction of that back. Middle age blows and this is where it’s uncomfortable, right? Because some of it seems like a talent that I like want to be a man and brag up. But most of it is is a horror show. It’s exactly like addiction where you feel so awful until you feed that addiction and then you momentarily feel better until you feel awful again. That’s what hypersexuality is like.

Jackie: You’re bipolar, we’ve talked about being manic and these things kind of going hand-in-hand. Is this a common symptom? Is it a symptom of being bipolar?

Gabe: Hypersexuality is a symptom of bipolar disorder. It’s also something that’s not uncommon in mania. Mental illness is all about something normal taken to an extreme right. Sadness is normal. Depression and feeling like you want to die. That’s an extreme and it’s an offshoot of sadness. But it also comes with garbled thoughts. Right? Like defining depression is just sadness is not really fair because sadness is normal. Mania is an offshoot of happiness. Like we want people to feel joy and elation and happiness. But obviously thinking that you are invincible and that you’re a God and that you can’t be hurt and king of the world, all of that is way too far. And, now think of sex. Wanting to have a lot of sex that could just be libido and everybody’s got a different libido. You know, some people want to have sex a couple of times a day. Some people want to have sex a couple of times a month. There’s no reason to put a label on or to declare who is right or who is wrong. You know, when you’re horny, have sex, have consensual sex or pleasure yourself, that is all really, really normal. Where it becomes dangerous is when you’re doing it for the wrong reasons. I wasn’t having sex to experience the pleasures of sex. I was having sex to feed the beast. I was having sex because if I didn’t, I couldn’t concentrate or focus on anything else. It was the only thing that I cared about. I would have ran a bus load of nuns off the road to get to that fix. And that’s not okay. That is not okay. And it’s incredibly dangerous. It’s incredibly dangerous.

Jackie: We’ll be right back after these messages.

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Gabe: And we’re back discussing hypersexuality.

Jackie: So is this like when you talk about times where you’ve been manic and you’re sort of just running full speed ahead? And then when it’s over, you realize you have to deal with the things that you did? Right. Like you have to maybe apologize or return a bunch of things you bought or whatever happens, you have to kind of rectify those situations. I would imagine in this situation, you probably have people in your life you need to talk to. But also, I’m assuming you’re not practicing like safe sex when this is happening. So what about the aftermath of those kinds of things?

Gabe: So there’s a few good discussion points. The thing that you said is I imagine you’re not practicing safe sex when you’re doing these things. For me personally, I was I was absolutely, unequivocally practicing safe sex because I was terrified of getting somebody pregnant and I was terrified of catching a venereal disease. Like apparently these don’t get anybody pregnant and don’t get an STD were lessons that were really pushed hard into me. And the example that I use is just because you experience psychosis doesn’t mean that you lose all of the talents that you have. People with bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, people in psychosis, people in major depression episodes. If you’re a scientist and you have major depression, you still have all of that science knowledge. So even though I was hypersexual, the risks that I took, Gabe Howard, personally were minimized.

Jackie: Right. But equating it to like, let’s say somebody who is on the streets and doing heroin or something, at some point the risk of what happens if you share a needle goes out the window and you’re like, doesn’t matter, I just need to do this. So I didn’t know if at some point the risk all goes out the window based on the compulsion or if you can rationalize through it.

Gabe: That’s a really difficult question to answer. And I want to be like really, really fair here. As a man, I have a lot of control in that I can use a condom right where, you know, sometimes women don’t have as much control because it it’s tougher for women. I don’t want to speak on behalf of all women, but it’s you know, you can take birth control pills, but that doesn’t do anything for STDs. So a lot of the women that I’ve spoken to that have had hypersexuality, they’ve been so desperate that they’ll show up somewhere, the dude won’t have a condom and they’ll think, well, hell with it, I’m on the pill. But that’s only half of the equation, right, that, you know, women who want to have a lot of sex need to carry condoms because dudes suck. They just absolutely suck. But then we push up against the whole sexual debate in our country. Well, a woman who carries around condoms is a slut. That’s just wholly unfair and unreasonable. But these are the things that adds all of these layers to hypersexuality. For me, I always made sure that I had protection and this helped me a lot. There is also, again, the masturbation aspect. Fifty percent of this is not with a partner. It’s just not. And then finally, we can’t ignore the fact that I had privilege. I had money. I did hire sex workers, but they were high end sex workers. And I hate to say that I do. I’m not trying to discriminate against anybody, but I hired sex workers who owned cars, had agencies, drove their cars to my house. It’s that that’s just it is different and it’s not fair, but it’s different.

Jackie: Ok, so going back in time, you are in this spell of hypersexuality, will say, two questions. How does it end and how do you prevent it from happening again? Or do you want to prevent it from happening again?

Gabe: Those are two really, really good questions. I’m going to answer the second one first. Yes, you absolutely want to prevent it from happening again, because when you’re having regular sex, sex with an engaged partner, sex that you want to have it. It’s so good. Sex is good. I can’t be more clear that sex is a wonderful thing. I’m trying desperately not to say that sex is a beautiful act between two people who love each other because it conjures up

Jackie: But it is. It is.

Gabe: But, I don’t want people to think that I’m talking about lights off missionary sex. No, you can have any kind of sex you want with a consenting adult. And what you and your partner like, especially when you’ve discussed it and you’re sexually compatible, like that’s amazing. And it’s one of the best parts of the world. This is not the kind of sex that people with hypersexuality get, just like in binge eating disorder. Binge eating disorder for most people is not going to a five star French restaurant with all of the servers who wear the tuxedos. No, it’s going to the buffet. The low quality buffet, all you can eat for five dollars and shoveling as much food as humanly possible into your mouth until you vomit. That’s what binge eating disorder looks like. So anybody that said, well, isn’t binge eating disorder great? You get to have all the food that you want? Yeah, we would all acknowledge that that person’s a moron. So anybody that says, well, isn’t hypersexuality great? You get to have all of the sex that you want. Yeah. Yeah. It’s the $5 buffet. It’s not quality. It’s

Jackie: Well,

Gabe: Not good. And it doesn’t make you feel good. And eventually you probably throw up.

Jackie: Too much of anything is bad. Literally across the board. I would argue too much of anything is bad.

Gabe: This applies to almost anything, and the first question is how does it end, like so many things with mental illness and especially with bipolar disorder? It ends because you cycle out of it like everything with mental illness and bipolar disorder on that spectrum, you just end up in a different place and you look back and you’re just like, oh, my God, how did this happen? Who do I have to call? What ex-girlfriend did I call up? How much money did I spend? And when I say how much money did I spend? There’s all kinds of ways to spend money surrounding sex, going to bars and buying drinks, buying people drugs is a real popular way to get laid. It’s the underbelly of bipolar, I guess. But I had money and resources, so I kept a group of basically sycophants around me who were willing to mooch off of me and occasionally have sex with me. That all makes you feel really awful. It’s just not good. It’s not what you want. It’s not the type of reflection on your weekend that you want to have. It’s just not. And in some cases, I’ve lost jobs over this. I’ve lost friendships because, you know, if my buddy’s girlfriend consents, I’m not going to talk her out of its end. These are real realities and problems. And I think that anybody who’s dated a lot has people in their lives that they really just need to cut off because they’re toxic and calling that person because you know, that they’re a quote unquote, sure thing. That’s a way to bring that toxicity back into your life and to remove all of the boundaries that you’ve created. And finally, it just feels awful. It’s awful. It takes a good thing and destroys it. And it has real ramifications for the rest of your life. My first wife left because of hypersexuality, and I don’t begrudge her for it at all. But I lost an entire marriage due to this symptom and other symptoms. But this symptom was a big one.

Jackie: Gabe, you mentioned anyone who can consent as somebody who is a candidate when you were hypersexual. Is there some aspect of people who are not consenting, who are sort of victims of people who are using hypersexuality as the causation of what happened?

Gabe: This is another one of those areas where it’s really, really tough, right? Because if you look at legal defenses, sometimes the perpetrator will say it’s not my fault. I was hypersexual and that’s what led to the inappropriate sexual behavior or the sexual assault. One, this is another one of those areas where data is hard to find. There doesn’t seem to be a lot of sexual assaults. And when I say sexual assault, I’m talking rape that occurs because of hyper sexuality. You don’t lose your morals because you’re hypersexual. I can’t say unequivocally that hypersexuality has never led to a sexual assault. I can’t. And I’m not trying to say that. But what I can say is that Gabe Howard unequivocally never had issues with this with hypersexuality in all of the years that I had it, because again, even though I was hypersexual, I still understood consent. I looked for strong yeses. I was very, very careful that I didn’t abuse anybody because that is a value of mine and that is important to me.

Jackie: Gabe, can you give any tips or advice for somebody who may be experiencing hypersexuality right now, like what can they do to make this better, make this go away or just get through it or lock themselves in the room and board up the windows? Like, how do you make it through this safely, but also without blowing up your whole life?

Gabe: Go to a doctor, go to the emergency room if you have to, go to your general practitioner, tell somebody immediately. You kept using the example of other addictions. Yeah, that that’s how it works, right? If you are addicted to drugs and alcohol, if you are addicted to food, if you are addicted to sex, you have to get help. This whole mind over matter idea is not going to work. I know that there are, you know, sex addicts anonymous groups and I’ve heard good things about them. Therapy is something that can help. For me, getting diagnosed and treated for bipolar disorder helped tremendously. Now that I have a solid, solid supports and treatment for bipolar disorder, hypersexuality is completely gone. It is a thing of the complete past. It is just a symptom that I watch out for. And now I can enjoy sex like a regular person. That’s like the pay rate. But yeah, you’d need to tell somebody. We have to get over this idea that every medical thing that happens to us we can solve on our own. Stop it. Stop it. Ask for help. Period. Ask for help now before you do real damage to your life.

Jackie: If this episode has spoken to you, if you are experiencing this, know, that one, you’re not alone in this. Obviously, Gabe can relate to this, can give you some good advice. But take that first step. Talk to a doctor or seek treatment. Get this out of your system in a healthy way and continue to work through this. To get to a point in your life where maybe this is no longer something you have to worry about.

Gabe: And the bonus is you get to enjoy sex again. I cannot be more clear how much this has changed my life getting treated for this symptom, and I cannot be more clear that while it was going on, I didn’t know it was going on. So if you suspect it. Get it checked out.

Jackie: Thanks, everybody, for tuning in, here’s what I’d like you to do. Subscribe to the podcast. Like the podcast. Share the podcast. Rate the podcast. Review the podcast. Do all the things that tell us that you like what we’re doing. And don’t forget to stick around to the end of this whole shindig because there is an outtake. I’m just gonna say this week’s probably gonna be a good one.

Gabe: See ya.

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Podcast: Sex Addiction, Hypersexuality, and Mental Illness syndicated from