#the guy haaas basically been the cause of my room being taken away from me + me having overloads in class

[snifferz]

myyy history teacher pulled me aside today and made a few unnecessary comments abt the fact that i need headphones in lesson (i am... REALLY. noise sensitive.)

i need a lot of accomodations for my autism and stuff. mooooost of which my college keeps either taking away from me or just flat out being rude to me abt it.

how the fuck do i react to more college ableism???? this hasnt been this explicitly bad since i started asking for accomodations in school.

[thetenacioustiger]

[Durga/Garuda] Happy Birthday to You

Original fanfic by 御田出汁春/おでんだしはる Translated by Cuppy

I’m not sure when we promised each other. I’m not sure it could even be called a promise; it was my partner’s one-sided wish. “When I die, there’s something I want you to do.” All I did was listen to my friend’s request. By chance, I happened to remember it.

The rain seemed to erase everything as it fell. Until just a few hours ago, comrades from that small Asian country had fought here on this soil. Blood and mud smeared the dead bodies piled there. They were run over with a tank, friend and foe alike were crushed and tampered with. Identifying any specific person would be pretty difficult. ‘Gruesome’ would be the right word; not one spark of life remained. 

Then, a single soldier appeared. In the midst of the muddled scenery, a man’s white, spiky hair and his body’s robotic parts belatedly shone. The man’s right eye gleamed ominously as he walked. Occasionally, he would come to a complete stop, kicking away the small piles underfoot. From beneath some of that flesh, the man’s friend was revealed. Completely annihilated. “Dumbass. You really messed up, idiot.” He stomped on his face with his combat boots. He rubbed his muddy boots on his hair and scalp, slowly pushing his head into the soft earth. Of course, there was no reaction. The scene was merely reflected in the man’s pupil. “You’re wasting my time! I shoulda left you. Everyone else have aaaall already evacuated.” The man lifted his foot, crouching down and roughly wiping his friend’s face with his sleeve, making him look like he was when he was alive. “You reeeaaally are stupid.” He began to reach for his cold left hand, but his eyes fixated on the black face of a watch. Through the sound of rain, he could clearly hear the ticking. Just like a heart, the man thought. Then, he thought that if he ever lost his own watch, he could replace it with his friend’s. Mechanical fingers skillfully wound around his belt. His dead friend’s heart beat in the man’s right hand. “...Well, I guess I owe that bastard one.” At this, he struck his solid right thigh with his mechanical right hand, emitting a clang. He pinched the part of his friend that appeared to be the nose, giving his fingers a flick. The flesh that flew off at the moment he snapped his fingers did not seem to bother the man at all. “Hehehe, not so handsome anymore, huh. Ohh nooo, what you should really worry about is what your mug’ll look like when you’re brought back to life!” Switching from his formerly calm composure, his throat shook with a huge laugh. He seemed to go mad with the belief that incredibly interesting things will happen from here on out, or maybe he was laughing from sheer joy. He held his stomach as the sound of his guffaws echoed.

The man, with his wet fingertips, traced the ripped open skin and exposed bone on the back of his friend’s neck. “Ahhh… I somehow remembered it, so I guess I’ll keep it. That promise we made.” He took the knife from the belt on his waist, and it glittered through the screen of rain.

“It’s an emergency! Hurry up and get ready.” The man had taken his friend back with him to the army hospital. With the knife and the man’s own strength, decapitating him had been no trouble at all. Taking him straight back to the hospital, he grabbed the first technician to catch his eye and proposed a transplant surgery. The skinny, bald man caught the freshly severed head reflexively as it was thrown down, replying detachedly. “He’s already dead, so there’s nothing we can do.” “Who said anything about reviving him? Transplant the contents into a Gargoyle chip. It’s not that unusual, right.” “Precedence isn’t the problem, but doing it without confirming the person’s intentions…” “He begged me to do it while he was alive.” “I can’t just do a memory transplant operation that easily. I need permission from my superiors, I don’t want them getting mad at me.” No sooner than he had finished speaking his refusal, the bald man found himself in a vice grip, the muzzle of a gun appearing from the man’s knee and firing three shots. In an instant, it became as silent as a graveyard. The man’s uniform pants were soaked in rainwater, mud, and blood, dripping to the ground and making a puddle. He tore them off, the bullet shells making scattered noises as they tumbled to the ground. The turning of his thigh revolver made a harsh mechanical sound, filling the room. Every person in the room had their heart gripped by that man. Everyone understood. That man is insane, and no words could get through to him. If that man decided to kill the technicians at that moment, he wouldn’t be able to escape his execution. But that, as far as the man was concerned, had no relation at all at the moment. Perform the operation without permission, or be killed. The engineers had 2 choices. One of the technicians licked his dry lips. He stared at the bald one, and then his gaze shifted to the man. From between the man’s dark lips, his white teeth shone through in a complacent smile. Almost like a shiver, he twitched in laughter. “No one is refusing, right? Weeeelll then, doctors…”

That final memory was of bathing in a hail of bullets and falling to the ground. Mouth filled with the taste of blood and mud, the face of that eccentric friend that I would never meet again was brought to mind. The feeling of dying. That’s right, I was dead. So then… what exactly is happening right now? The inside of my head made a strange sound, just like the sound of a computer starting up----the inside of my head? I have no skull... …. In a dark space, green and blue letters were suspended, a yellow radar, many people in front of my eyes, white labcoats, code; it seems like this is a hospital… I’m really seeing this, right? How did this happen to me? It couldn’t be that I lived despite taking a direct hit from an explosion? ….Perhaps, possibly, that guy really-- “Hey, old man, he’s OK, right? If you messed up, I’ll fucking kill you.” “He’s fine, more or less.” As he looked up at the giant, unmanned, mass-produced, and considerably larger than himself weapon, the man nodded. His tail cut through the air with a whoosh.

Suddenly, the Gargoyle’s eyes flashed red. The head shook bit by bit. The vibration slowly spread downward, the code randomly reaching out and causing him to shake. It seems that somehow or another, his life’s data was installed successfully, and the startup had commenced. “Haaa, did ya wake up, ya big pig? It’s a beautiful day! Hyaaaahaha!” “Stop kicking this army-owned equipment, it would be better if you at least direct your kicks at his actual living body.” “No no no, he’s already dead, with no way to revive him… basically.” With that, the man narrowed his eyes into slits at the strange and unavoidable state of affairs, opening his mouth wide like a yawning cat. “Wahh!! Happy Birthday! Right? Hyaahahaaha...Hehehehee, ….hyaahaahaa, haahahahahaaaaa. Since you ended up in that kind of body, you have all these new skills you can make use of! Guess it was a good thing you died, huh? Yeah, hey. Why don’t you give yours truly some thanks!” The bald man was still, not listening to the “clang, clang” as he kicked the Gargoyle. The brand new weapon already had a scar. Grind, grind, the Gargoyle’s body began to move little by little. It’s awkward, but his determination can be sensed through his movements. “Ohh, you can already move...Well, I guess you’ve grasped the current situation. Gargoyle QG01028j, if you can hear me, raise your right hand. How’s your field of vision? If it’s OK, then lower your hand… Mm, the transplant was a success. I haven’t run all the checks yet, but I’d say your past data is 98% problem-free. Ah, I guess you would know that already.” “Old man, of course there’s no way he would’ve forgotten me…” The mechanical arm reached out towards the man. At that moment, his head crashed into the Gargoyle’s armored chest. The man’s large frame was held in a hug by the steel arm. “Uh!? ...Gah…! ...Stop, this… Gaaaah” “Ah, looks like he remembers you, great, isn’t that great.” The bald-headed man spoke in monotone as he took down notes at a high speed. No matter how he beat at his blue head, the man was only released when he was on the verge of being crushed to death. From his split forehead, blood flowed, polluting his artificial eye, but he looked at his friend without wiping it away. Both eyes seemed responsive, flickering, and the man let his teeth show just a little. And then, he silently laughed.