#the woman wrote it once a month for 20 years give

[petit-papillion]

I'm not sending this message to be hateful or to criticize but I honestly think that we overrate Charles too much. I like him a lot but I find it exaggerated to put him on the same level as max. Maybe at one time Charles could have reached the same level as Max or really had a rivalry with him but now I think it's too late. he missed his chances. Charles is a very talented driver but not a generational driver. I think he made bad career choices, that he should have left Ferrari because even if the team makes progress, it will never regain its former glory. I think Charles is destined for 2nd place. Especially now that Lando is improving a lot, he is starting to surpass Charles in terms of skill just as his team is surpassing Ferrari. I think Lando will be the one to become Max's rival and win a title before Charles. It must be recognized that Ferrari will always make mistakes, and when she doesn't, it benefits Charles's teammate. I doubt that Charles will be the priority with the arrival of Lewis. Charles should have left Ferrari when it was time, now it's too late. I think that that's too bad. But Charles and Max are absolutely not in the same category, Max is too far ahead of Charles and has been for a very long time. I think it is too late for Charles and Ferrari, they missed their opportunity. I can't see Charles becoming champion in front of Lando or Max

Hello Anon. Not really sure what brought on these thoughts, but I respectfully disagree with several of your points.

Not a generational driver? To be honest, I think that term is overused and puts unnecessary expectations on a driver. So much also depends on having the right car, the right people pushing you forward, the right mindset, the right opportunities. Maybe THE generational driver is a woman who only drove karts for fun and never pursued a career in professional racing.

Should've left Ferrari? Where exactly do you suggest Charles should've gone in the last 5 years? Red Bull? Already have a number 1 driver in Max. Mercedes? Had a number 1 in Lewis, and then their car was shit for a long time. George only has 1 win under his belt. McLaren? Also shit for the longest time and Lando is their golden boy who only just this year got his first win. Ferrari may have fumbled some opportunities, but Charles is the only one with a Top 3 finish in the WDC in the past 5 years from a team that is not Red Bull or Mercedes. And besides that, he is a Ferrari man through and through, something I wrote about in early December - a couple of months before his new contract was announced:

Not number 1 priority at Ferrari once Lewis arrives? It's possible. Only time will tell. But Ferrari does not give long contracts like they've given to Charles to anyone else, so there's that.

Not in the same category? It's true that Max is far ahead, just like Red Bull has been ahead of Ferrari. At the same time, it's not like anyone else has been able to come close to Max and the RBR's car's superiority until recently. Fred is doing a fine job making improvements in the team, but it takes a while to turn the ship around.

Lando to become champion before Charles? Again, it's possible, because a lot depends on the car they drive. It takes a combination of a skilled driver and a fast car, as we have seen with Checo not being able to do what Max can with the same car, and Lando not winning any races in an inferior McLaren. The experience driving a fast car may need to be developed as well, and Charles certainly is not the only one who has made mistakes under pressure. I literally just finished watching a race where George and Lando both made mistakes that cost them the lead in a race either of them could've won.

By the way, here is Max this race weekend being asked if he had to bet on just one driver to become world champion, who he would pick:

🎥 archive33mv

Finally, just so there is no misunderstanding: I will always keep hoping that Charles achieves his dream of becoming WDC, just as I never gave up hope he could win in Monaco. I am not as delusional to think it will be easy. Or even if he manages to win it, that he is at the same level as Max is right now. But I would like him to get there...

[poomphuripan]

Do you have any show recommendations for this weekend? Or anything catches your attention for the next couple months? My stand in has been raising the bar so much, none of the currently aired shows are worth watching T.T 4 minutes seems alright but they have like 8 episodes only, I’m so afraid to get hopes up

hi nonnie (❁´◡`❁)

fridays are so dull without my stand-in i know, also saturday too when wandee gooday ends this week (┬┬﹏┬┬). but there are some very good series about to start soon and currently airing... perhaps you can give these a try?

Century Of Love - magical realism, action, romance, comedy

Synopsis: San is faithfully devoted to his love. He has spent his life waiting for his lost beloved, Wat, to reincarnate from her death a century ago. But when the darkness of the night looms, he will be forcibly afflicted by the power of the five shades stone. If he fails to find Wat within this century's time window, he will inevitably succumb to a tragic death for eternity. The final year of the century is about to end before the stone's power turns into his eternal curse. He meets Vee, a frivolous, charming adonis who seems connected to his life. San is appalled by Vee at first sight, but this unrelated boy is actually his beloved Wat, whom he has been anticipating for almost a century.

my thoughts so far: it's really fun, quite fast paced (understandably since there's only 10 eps and there are 2 eps airing each week), the chemistry is fantastic, as expected of daouoffroad.

Meet You At The Blossom - wuxia, romance

Synopsis: Jin Xiao Bao, the son of the wealthiest man in the Jiangnan region, falls in love with icy, white-clothed beauty Huai En due to an unexpected meeting. This young woman he sees as his future wife, however, seems to have aroused a lot of enmity. When he comes to the rescue of an injured Huai En, who's tainted by an aphrodisiac, the true identity of this beauty is revealed.

my thoughts so far: i haven't caught up with the latest ep but first two eps have been fun. it's adapted from the debut novel of shui qian cheng who wrote professional body double aka my stand in novel so you can see similar traits of her typical scum ml in huai en. the actors are probably rookie so the acting leaves much to be desired and a lot of room for improvement in that aspect but supporting it anyway since it's the first uncensored wuxia bl freed from censorship limbo.

Currently these two are the only "pure" BL series i'm watching because most of the time i just end up rewatching series i already know and love. I'm always on a casual Nadao/GDH rewatch, so if you haven't seen these before, I highly recommend them, not QL but they're fun nonetheless.

Great Men Academy - magical realism, unicorn hijinks, body transformation, queer

Synopsis: Love has always been a fan of the popular guy Vier of the famous Great Men Academy but has never had the chance to meet him. One day, she sees the mystical unicorn rumored to fulfill wishes and wished for her love for Vier to get a chance. Unfortunately the unicorn interpreted her wishes in a different way and Love wakes up to find herself… as a guy?

my thoughts: i have watched this series more than 20 times in full, and lost count of the times i've casually rewatched certain eps. it's just super wholesome and TANGMO BEST BOY! watch this for tangmo best boi, you shall not be let down by scene stealer tangmo and his 5 minutes screentime.

Bad Genius The Series - academic rivalry, heist, thriller, drama

Synopsis: Lin, a genius high school student who makes money by cheating tests, receives a new task that leads her to set foot on Sydney, Australia. In order to complete the millions-Baht task, Lin and her classmates have to finish the international STIC (SAT) exam and deliver the answers back to her friends in Thailand before the exam takes place once again in her home country.

my thoughts: if someone asked me what is the most perfect thai series i've ever watched, i would choose this series in a heart beat. bad genius the series is one of the rarest case where i genuinely believe a series remake has outdone its film predecessor (worth noting that one same studio produced both). it's got the perfect amount of angst and tension and cinematography style that i adore. if you want a breath of fresh air, i HIGHLY recommend this series for a change from all the other ql series airing.

ps: if you can't find official links to watch the two series above, don't feel bad about watching them in unofficial/grey websites because the original platform they were on shut down 2 years ago ಥ_ಥ they're literally my hidden gems but i don't want to gatekeep them any longer

for upcoming series, i'm thinking of starting The Trainee and I Saw You In My Dream and 4 Minutes. But I usually try to take breaks in-between series I have huge hyperfixation on like I Feel You Linger In The Air or My Stand-In like right now and I just rewatch low stake series I already love like Lovely Writer or some series I mentioned above.

i'm really sorry if this isn't much help because you're talking to someone who rarely watch new series unless they get a random urge and motivation to sit through a 30+ eps lakorn just for one actor. but i hope you found a motivation to watch one of the series i recommended above if you've been thinking about any of them (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

[steddie-island]

20 Questions for writers

I was tagged by @runninriot over 2 months ago Thank you friend 😘🥰

I've done one before but I like answering these types of questions so I'm doing it again.

No pressure tagging @wynnyfryd @stervrucht @wormdebut @mugloversonly @augustjustice

Pressure tagging @v3llichor who saw this over my shoulder and said "I wanna fill one out!" 😂😘😘

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

37, all but 1 of which were posted between October of last year and now. Which I'm really proud of. 🥹 The only other fic I'd written and posted was for Frasier back in 2020.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

63,421!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I write Stranger Things mostly, but I've written Good Omens, Frasier, and Destiel (I haven't written for them in a loooong time though.)

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Just Because We Get Around (Part 1 of my Fuck his dad series. Steve is Dustin's dad, Eddie is Dustin's college friend, they fuck nasty and then there are feelings. It's silly and cheesy and I still love it even if I think about renaming it at least once a week. 😂)

Mutually Beneficial (Written for this art by @2jihiir0 😌 There may be a part 2 coming if I can ever get Inspired to work on it again WE'LL SEE!)

With Extra Nuts (Eddie sees Steve in his Scoops uniform, they fuck nasty in the back room about it.)

Dustin's Dad (Has Got Me Down Bad (Part 2 of Fuck his dad, wherein Dustin finds out. 😌)

Vixen (Steve wears lingerie to a Christmas party. He and Eddie fuck nasty about it when they get home. There's a pattern here. 😂)

5. Do you respond to comments?

It definitely takes me some time sometimes but I try to! Even the ones that are just like, hearts or a laugh emoji. They took their time to not only read my fic but to leave a comment and I want them to know that I appreciate it. 🥹

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I had an answer here but I had completely forgotten about A rush kinda like the old times (I still cross your mind). It's Stommy, with Tommy reaching out to (fem) Steve after he gets engaged. There's lots of reminiscing but it's bittersweet because Tommy's clearly not happy, and Stevie isn't going to give him what he wants.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I have a transfem Steve series (Wallpaper, Long Haul, Candles) that gave me so much joy to write. I don't really write unhappy endings (IDK maybe that'll change but I kind of doubt it. to quote T Swift, "I'm just too soft for all of it.") but these three just. I'm really proud of them. Part one is Stevie coming out to Robin, part 2 is Eddie, and then part 3 is Stevie getting dicked down a happy ending to her birthday. I was nervous to write these, because I'm not trans. None of it is from Stevie's POV, it's from the POV of the people who love her. And that's what I wanted to show. A beautiful trans woman who had been through so much hell before life decided to throw gender stuff at her, getting to come out, getting to be herself, and getting so much love and support from the people around her. 🥹🥹🥹🥹

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully no (knock on wood)!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

All kinds? We have monster fucking and some good ol' sapphic steddie semi-hate fucking and some Steve playing Billy Loomis (with the softest fucking aftercare in the world, tbh). 15 of the fics I've posted are explicit (it feels like there should be more but I think that just means they're all in WIP purgatory, who knows when/ if they'll see the light of day).

10. Do you write crossovers?

I have one I've been working on for months that's a Marmalade/ Baron x Eddie fic but I also haven't touched it in months. 😅

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of (knock on wood again).

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so but that'd be cool!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic?

Not one that's been posted yet but I actually have two written with my spouse that we're going to upload eventually!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I love Steddie, I've found so much community here, but I would be remiss to not acknowledge the fact that Destiel had such a strong hold on me for years. I've made so many friends because of it, I literally met my spouse writing it.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I honestly don't know. I'm intending on finishing the ones I have started but my WIP folder is kind of daunting so. Who knows?

16. What are your writing strengths?

Even though I don't write it often I think my angst is pretty good. I've also been told that I make things feel very alive, and that's something I try hard to do, too (and am glad that I can do, I've only been writing for over half of my life even if I'm only just now posting it! 😅)

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Action scenes. I struggle SO HARD with action scenes. It's something I'm working on, something I've been working on for a while, but I feel like my pacing is way off and needs a lot of work.

I also can't write slow burn to save my fucking life. I just want them to get to smoochin' already!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I would do it but I would want to be so careful and not have a scenario where I translate it as one thing and someone comes along and says "she said he smells like dirty socks and liver" or something. 😂

19. First fandom you wrote for?

That I posted, Frasier. First fandom that I started writing for in general was Spn!

20. Favorite fic you've written?

This is the same answer I gave last time but I think it has to be Don't go where I can't follow, which was I think my 2nd Steddie fic? It's under 1,000 words but it's the one I've reread the most. There's lots of hurt/comfort packed into those 990 words. It was written as a kinktober prompt, written in an hour and posted in the middle of the night and IDK. I just really love it.

[contrivedcoincidences6]

mulder and scully 26 for the kiss prompt 👀

Thank you!!!!! Ngl I'm so excited you sent me this you know it's my intention to drag you into my current obsession 🤣 sorry for any errors I forwent a beta for such a short story and wrote it all in like 20 mins.

26. kissing to make sure others know they’re taken

---

Me: God I hate the Diana arc so much Also me: Writing yet another fic about it because I love how intense Scully gets

---

Her first reaction to seeing Diana holding Mulder’s hand was an immense sense of loss and jealousy. She could tell they had some sort of history but she hadn’t had the chance to talk to Mulder since the meeting that morning. The Scully of just a few months ago would have walked away, head bowed, tears in her eyes. But she knew her place in Mulder’s life and by his side.

She’d woken up just that morning with Mulder in her bed, his arms and legs wrapped around her like she was his source of life. It was just three months ago when Mulder had driven her home from the hospital after the incident at Ruskin dam and things changed. He’d been getting ready to leave after making sure she was comfortable but he’d stopped at the door and just stared at her before pulling her into an embrace that morphed into a kiss.

As they’d laid in her bed later that evening, Mulder held her close and told her he loved her and everything changed. Most nights Scully found herself asking Mulder to come home with her, on evenings when they were exhausted or injured from the day they would sleep huddled together.

The incident with the New Spartans had tested them but afterwards they’d grown even stronger so as Scully entered the room where Mulder and Diana stood talking closely she tamped down her insecurity.

Mulder smiled as she entered the room in a way that made it impossible not to smile back. He drops Diana’s hand casually and takes the folder Scully holds out to him. She can feel Diana’s eyes on them as Scully explains Gibson’s test results and the amazing developments there that could explain Gibson’s gift. After reading over the results and listening Mulder looks up at her in amazement.

“We will need to run more tests, of course, but if these results are correct this could be quantifiable scientific proof of all of our work,” Scully couldn’t keep the excitement from her voice. The way Mulder looked at her made her heart flutter and she suddenly wanted to be alone in their basement office more than anything.

“How do you quantify the spiritual? It can’t be done,” Diana said, breaking the spell.

Scully sized up the woman next to her, a woman who had once been Mulder’s partner in more than just the X Files.

“Nothing happens in contradiction to nature, only in contradiction to what we know of it,” Scully repeats the words she said to Mulder years before as they had stood before his mother’s hospital bed thinking all hope was lost.

Diana’s eyes narrowed but before she could say anything Mulder spoke up, “Scully’s right, this could be the key to everything in the X Files. We need to bring this to Skinner, this is leverage, let’s go.”

In true Mulder fashion he began to gather his things in a rush, ready to move onto the next thing but Diana reached forward to grab his hand.

“Fox, it’s unwise to use this information widely. You don’t want to draw too much attention to the X Files,” she said as she rubbed his hand with her thumb in a way that made Scully feel sick.

Mulder pursed his lips and shook his head. “We need to pursue this lead, it’s the answer to everything we’ve been searching for.”

Gently, Mulder pulled his hand from Diana’s and moved into Scully’s space, handing her back the folder containing the EEG results.

He squeezed her arm and smiled at her. “Ready?”

The admiration in his eyes and the ridiculous need to stake her claim gave Scully courage and she pushed up on her toes to give Mulder a quick, but more than friendly kiss.

Mulder seemed stunned but shot her a goofy grin before throwing his jacket over his arm and heading out the door.

Before leaving the room herself Scully turned to give Diana a long look. “See you back in the city Agent Fowley.”

[therottingrota]

Well she can’t really help germs when her kids are going to school

That farm shop video was a couple of months after her surgery and cancer does not prevent you from walking fast

1. A surgery does not need to be planned months in advance it could have literally been planned the week before

2. KP are private, they were never going to give you weekly updates! The significant update was Kate’s announcement and they didn’t do it sooner because themselves as a family needed to process it! Hearing the C word is terrifying

3. The Mother’s Day was a mistake and it’s not out of the ordinary to fix up photos

4. Well you will have to ask the photographer about that, and when have you ever seen several pap photos of Kate taken at once since being a royal??

5. Woman in the same car as her and her husband both go to London isn’t strange. They were coming out of their estate and I doubt they thought a pap would be there! Again our paparazzi laws are strict and they are completely different to Americans.

6. Not odd they just literally want privacy as Kate is ill

You need to separate them into groups megziters talk about Meghan constantly and have Kate as a profile picture! Wales fans just talk about waleses

I don’t see these jam spreadsheets because I don’t follow megziters or people who talk about Meghan and harry…

Kate’s been in the public eye for 20 years theres plenty to talk about and show support for

Judging and mocking the wales children’s appearances, making snide remarks and name calling towards and their parents is targeted harassment

Well why wouldn’t Kate be coming back? Let her recover then she will be back! Also, using words like ‘resurrect’ is sinister and that’s why she gave the announcement before Easter because people were waiting and she knew she would not be back🙄 no you are not curious just nosy

She doesn't have to further be around germs. That's something she can control. Plus you nor I have seen her with the kids.

Omg It's like you people completely choose to read over what I just wrote. Listen to me slowly I said she was still in ADOMINAL SURGERY recovery and she was practically speed walking through the parking lot. On top of chemo I'd think she'd feel even weaker

But they said specifically it was planned. Basically when she was in the hospital they had to rearrange their engagements. If the surgery was planned they could have planned the engagements around the surgery even weeks in advance.

KP then didn't need to lie. If KP are private then they have no business working in a public institution. If KP wants to be secretive and private then the royal should become private citizens. And I never asked for weekly update, I'm talking about significant updates like oh I don't know...the future queen has cancer. They shouldn't have said "we'll provide significant updates when they happen" if they're not going to stick by their word. They're (KP press relations)are a bunch of clowns.

It is out of the ordinary because the photos were botched so bad that AP and Reuters issued a kill notice and their integrity is place next to north korea. Again you're whining about simple mistakes like its a flubbed up highschool art project, not like they're the highest people in the land, soon to be heads of state. We except professionalism from them & they're well within their means to hire a professional or someone to at least over see their photos they release TO THE PUBLIC, remember they're not releasing these photo within their family or on a group chat, they're releasing them to the WHOLE WORLD. The excuse for these grown adults and other adults that help them is asinine.

I've seen lots of photos. Of her dropping the kids off at school, of her frolicking in a park with her kids and the other mount batten cousins, of her with her kids with Meghan (& baby Archie) at a polo match, her leaving a clothing store in london, ect....

Again oversimplify it. Woman & husband aren't just going for a simple joy ride. Why is woman riding with husband who is on the way to a Commonwealth Service that she is not attending??? If woman is going to a private appointment. Are we to assume that woman will wait at appointment until husband gets out of Commonwealth service? Why did pap have one photo of woman and husband and the photo is the burriest shit known to man when we have seen crystal clear photos of woman and husband doing simple stuff like drop their kids off at school, plus there has been more than one photo of them doing these activities.

Again what's the word "megitzer" derived from? I'd like to know all these new words that are created out of thin air. I've also seen bunches of so called "megitzers" that claim to be Wales fans, According to Taz & Megan's Mole being the most notorious. I don't think there is really a large distinction between Wales fans or Megitzers like you're trying to make out, they're usually all cut from the same cloth.

So if there's plenty to talk about with Kate, then what are you talking about?

When have I mocked the kids appearances? You're saying I'm judging and mocking them but you can't name one thing I've said. Stop lying. Is it because I mentioned that Louis' teeth haven't grown back in over a month? That's not mocking his appearance. I'm asking a simple question as to the chronological timeline of when that mothers day photo and his birthday photo were taken.

lmao calling Will lazy isn't harassment honey. What names have I called Kate too?You Wales fans are the softest lot I've seen. At least I don't call Kate a whore or an Instagram bitch loving wife like Wales fans do with Meghan. All the obscene things they've called Meghan doesn't come close to anything I've ever said about Will or Kate.

As far as why wouldn't Kate come back, that's a question you should ask her & the palace who've have done a list of weird stuff ever since she was admitted to hospital.

Again if that market run is any indication, I think she's recovering fine plus like I said how am I, who is taking notes of the weird stuff relating her illness, impeding her recovery process? Using a word like resurrect is a figure of speech. It can mean to simply come back from a long hiatus, you can even use the word to describe some whose woken up after taking along nap. Its not sinister. If she knew she would not come back why did she let the palace claim she'd be back? I and others are curious, (you can call it nosiness,doesn't matter because nosiness still involves curiosity💀), if you don't like it stay off my blog🤷

Be gone!!

[filcoco]

Lioness AU- Part 3 -Married Couple Stories.

Being parents is hard, being young parents is extremely hard, and being young parents to a Metamorphmagus baby is a nightmare mode.

Sebastian underestimates the whole situation.

Sebastian and Leon’s first child, Semeion, is a Metamorphmagus. His birth almost killed Leon and caused her to be bedridden for months. Leon’s parents can't help; Leon’s younger siblings are killing them. Sebastian doesn’t want to stress Anne and definitely does not want to live with Solomon again. So he learned how to handle the baby on his own and took care of his depressed wife.

Metamorphmagus baby can’t control their ability to shift change; sometimes they will show sickness but not actually have it, or they can disappear into thin air. Sebastian was worn out, but he gain so many experience as a father and he found a new job for himself.

After they graduated from Hogwarts, Sebastian worked at Daily Prophet as a reporter for a few months. He had to quit his job after Semeion was born. But he kept a good relationship with the editor. He proposed to open a column to share his home hacks and spells.

The editor agreed, and Sebastian has a column named: “Mrs. Sallow’s Serect Garden.” He shares some life hacks, his daily life(complaints) and answers questions from readers as Mrs. Sallow. Everyone thinks Mrs. Sallow is a wise old woman who makes cookies for her grandchildren.

Leon was depressed after giving birth to Semeion. She had a vision that so many horrible things would happen in this world, and she couldn't do anything about it. She felt powerless and had nightmares about disappointed Professor Fig. She was terrified, and mentally, she shut herself in.

After starting the column, Sebastian would read to Leon those silly things he wrote. Gradually, Leon responded to these things and started to laugh again.

Under Sebastian’s care and support, Leon recovered and got back on her feet.

Leon, Poppy and Natty got together and started an underground organization to save the world. They did a lot of things, like capturing a Nundu that was trafficked by poachers and was running loose.

Sebastian is not happy about it. His wife is putting herself in danger and not telling him. He wants to join the party but has been told it is a girl’s club. Then he discovered that it was a lie. Garreth is also a member.

Leon tries to reason this by saying Semeion needs his father, but Sebastian says Semeion is old enough and his mother-in-law is available for a helping hand.

Then Leon comes up with an idea, she will get herself knocked up with another kid, and Sebastian will have no choice but to stay home and take care of the new child.

She thought this was a genius idea. (She is dumb)

During this time, Sebastian finds out who is Semeion’s birth father. Semeion is a parselmouth. Sebastian already had the feeling that the father couldn't be him; he was taking birth control potion at that time.

He told Leon about this; he was scared that Leon would leave him to find Ominis, but he decided to give Leon this choice.

Leon never cared who is the father, but she was surprised by Sebastian’s love and devotion. She felt guilty about using the child to tie down Sebastian; she wanted to have a child with Sebastian out of love.

And they had another eight kids in the next 20 years.

Leon is still trying to save the world, and they will have some fights here or there. Once, they had a big fight, and Sebastian took a break for three months. But in the end, they get back together and grow strong as a family.

After Mrs.Sallow promoted birth control in “her” column, the column was shut down. Luckily, Leon is rich, super rich, so they don't worry about money. But Sebastian doesn't want to live on his wife’s money, so he finds another job as the Magic Theory Professor at Hogwarts.

He returned to his favourite place in the world, and living the best of his life with his growing large family.

He is happy, until Ominis’ return.

Part 4 will come, I guess…

[ellegreenawayslover]

20 Author Questions

I was tagged by @blackbird-brewster and @tedwinisconfused :) (This took me too long haha)

1. How many words do you have on AO3?

I have 12 works, two are not finished, and the rest are mostly one-shots. I also have like 4 or 5 other works in my docs that I really need to finish.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

74,082!!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mostly criminal minds.

I do have a few fics from other shows, but that is just because every time two women look at each other for a couple of seconds, I like to write them being in love. I haven't necessarily watched the show they are from. And most of them are just sitting in my docs and will probably will stay there forever.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Happy birthday!

Bedtime stories

Home

Paris is lonely in the mornings

Hope (is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

YES!! Every. Single. One.

My heart melts every time I see that someone commented on one of my fics. I would love to hug every person who takes the time to comment on one of my fics and give them a little kiss on their forehead, but I can't. The only thing I can do is reply to those comments and let them know how much it meant to me! :)

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I haven't written much angst that I like enough to post. And I usually write more hurt/comfort than angst, but I have a few of them.

The angstiest I have written so far is Paris is lonely in the mornings or (and if I didn't know better) I'd think you were still around. But I think once I finish the jemily fic I'm writing based on Is it over now? they won't be the angstiest anymore :).

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Like I said, I usually write hurt/comfort or just fluff, so I don't which one has the happiest ending, but here are the softest fics I have written: Personal prayer, Home, Happy birthday! and When Elle falls in love.

Not the happiest ending as such because it isn't finished yet, but my Elle fic Hope (is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have) is on its happy Elle face, and it will have a happy ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I haven't (and I'm really grateful because I wouldn't know how to react, to be honest).

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I have written a few fics with smut, but I haven't written enough to know what I like to write if that makes sense.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I have. But in the sense of taking a character from another show/movie and making them appear in a fic of another one. Most of the time, I make them into a sort of original character and keep their name.

11. Have you ever had a fiction stolen?

Nope.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

(Unless you count me translating them into Spanish and keep that somewhere in my docs and forgetting they exist until months later and then delete them. I don't know why I do this because even though Spanish is my first language, I haven't really written in Spanish for years.)

13. Have you ever co-writtten a fic before?

Nope. I don't think I'd be able to because I write the ideas that have been stuck in my mind, but I can't explain them until they are finished (I don't know if it makes sense).

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Jemily!! I love them so much!

I also love Elle with any other female character, and lately, I've been writing more of Elle/JJ and Elle/Emily.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have too many WIPs in my docs, and I hope to finish all of them, but I don't know if I will or when I will.

One I don't know if I will finish, and it breaks my heart because I really loved it at first, is one about Emily in Paris when she is "dead," and although I wanted it to have a happy ending, it is pretty angsty, and I don't have the energy to go back to it.

16. What are your writing strengths?

If I am writing a fic about a little idea I had, I have all the details of what I want to write in my head and in a little notebook I take everywhere. I think I'm pretty good at describing the emotions the characters are feeling. So that, I guess.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

It usually takes me so long to write, but in the I can write 70% of something in 4/5 hours but spend twice the time for the other 30% way. I always have too many things in my brain, so focusing on just one to write is the most difficult thing sometimes, and my dyslexia won't let me write the things I want to write in a way that makes sense.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I love it, but when it is a language I don't know, I'm too scared to do it haha.

I do love to write some parts in Spanish in my fics.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

It was for a Spanish show about doctors that my best friend and I were obsessed with back when I was 11/12. After that, I would say a few other Spanish shows.

Criminal Minds was the first fandom I wrote that wasn't just for my best friend and me

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

I have an immense amount of love for Hope (is a dangerous thing for a woman like me to have). That fic is my baby.

I also have a special love for The first step toward healing and Happy birthday! They are the first fics I wrote that I let other people read, and they are so special to me.

Tagging: @introverted-author @scorpsik @prentiss-theorem @5ivebyfive @alexblakeisgay (no pressure though)

[myfriendofmiseryyy]

Frankie's girl: a Frankie Morales x plus sized oc story.

MINORS DNI. PART ONE MENTONS OF PTSD.PAST ABUSE. PAST SMUT (she is Frankie's old best friend) war, insecurities. suggestive convos. drug abuse, Frankie deserving better

summery: Frankie has just returned from his 10 year deployment in Iraq, he left behind his old high school friend Daisy who he had always secretly liked, could he make it work with them?

Daisys pov

Daisy waits at the airport for Frankie and Santi, her two oldest friends, they have been gone on and off for around 10 years now in the delta force. they have been based all over the Middle East but most recently Iraq. Frankie has always been her best friend, they even hooked up in their early 20s, Frankie being the person to take her virginity when she was 21.

she is snapped out of her daydream by a tired looking Frankie and Santi coming through arrivals. "Frankie,santi!!" she calls out.

Frankie's pov:

He could tell that voice from anywhere,his Daisy,his oldest friend apart from Santi, his "hermosa" as he always called her a teenager.

he quickly walks though arrivals and finds her, he could spot her in a sea of a million people. she was always so beautiful. her chestnut brown hair which always had ringlocks, her curvaceous body which she always hated but Frankie found the most attrative thing ever, her smile that lit up any room she went into.

Frankies immediately wraps daisy In the biggest hug. "I've missed you so much" he says trying to hold back tears. "I've missed you too Frankie" she says sofly.

DAISYS r pov: as soon as Frankie comes into view it's like you are 15 again, he is still just as handsome as before, if not even more handsome. his angler nose and deep brown eyes are now joined by a slightly Aged face with a look of sadness, you always hated seeing Frankie sad but now you are just happy to see him alive and well. when he hugs you its like all the wieght and sadness of the past ten years had disappeared you had your Frankie back.

TWO WEEKS LATER.

DAISYS POV...

You are watching tv after a long day when there is a sudden knock on the door, “it’s 10pm who is knocking at my door at 10pm” you honestly feel anxious and your guard is completely up,the reality of being a woman in society. You look through the peephole to see a very sad and possibly drunk Frankie,you last saw him yesterday and he seemed very on edge but didn’t speak about it. You open the door and he nearly falls through it,he is most definitely drunk. “Hermosa” he slurs “Frankie,you’re freezing” it’s around 5 degrees outside and is out there in a tshirt. “Wtf” you hiss at him. “I’m sorry cari��o,your place was the only place I thought of” “of course” you think to yourself.

“Stay here,I’ll go get you some clean clothes.” Frankie slumps down on the sofa and groans,he didn’t want you to see him like this. Weak,drunk,and sad. He is a shell of the man he once was,his brain constantly replaying the horrors that he been through the last 8 years. He puts his hands over his face and sighs.

“Here” you say softly, “bathroom is on the right”

Frankie stumbles to his feet and you help him to the bathroom where you wait outside for him,not fully trusting him alone. “You ok in there ciso?” You use the nickname you always called him as kids,you met in 7th grade and were best friends for 10 years and then Frankie wrote to you every single month. “Uh huh” Frankie says quietly. When he returns from the bathroom you’ve already got a blanket and pillow from your bedroom “I’ve got the sofa ok? You’ve got the bed,you need it” you softly say and smile at him. “Hermosa,you don’t have to give up your bed for me. I come into your house drunk and soaking wet and you give me clean clothes,medicine and then give up your own bed for me... I'm a junkie daisy the last two years ive been abusing coke" Frankie chokes back tears. “Look at me frankie,you have been my best friend since I was 12 years old,you always took care of me through everything. Now it’s my turn to take care of you ok,I can see how much you are struggling right now sweetheart, I know about the drugs, Santi told me its not your fault I am going to get you into rehab as soon as you feel strong enough until then ,just let me take care of you ok?” He pulls you into a hug,although he smells like cheap beer there is still an element of your Frankie,a musky smell that has always been Frankie. You rub his back softly and kiss his forehead. “We will talk tomorrow I promise” Frankie says sleeply”

“Get some sleep cariño” you say.

Frankie’s pov:

“I can’t do this anymore” Frankie thinks to himself after his forth beer he takes one big swig of water then stumbles outside to walk to her place. His mind is a minefield (quite literally) and his breathing is laboured. He stops for a moment to look at the mess he had become,the beer,the coke no wonder no one wants him. Its become a coping mechanism,the drugs the alcohol,now he’s back home,this isn’t training camp anymore this isn’t the trenches either,or a empty helicopter bay he can drown himself in coke in. He’s home,in his hometown. You’re here and he wants to make things right again…”like turning up at her house unannounced at 10pm high of my tits will help” he mutters to himself as he comes to your street. He meant to knock on your door quietly but he ends up being very heavy handed with it, and nearly falling through the door when you open it. he is soaking wet and freezing "mi hermosa" Frankie slurs, "wtf" you hiss at him as he stumbles into your house "I'm sorry carino your place was the only place I could think of." he can see right through you, he can see that you are confused and angry and he doesnt blame you, he would be too. "ill get you some clean clothes,you stay here ok" you say softly, Frankie slumps on to the sofa and puts his head in his hands, "I've really fucked up" he says to himself.

'here" you say handing him the soft warm clothes, "bathroom is on the right, ill be here if you need anything"

Frankie sleepily gets up and goes to the bathroom to put the fresh clothes on, the smell like you, the soft linen smell mixed with the faint smell of your perfume the you haven't had the heart to change since you were a teenager. Frankie inhales it as he puts the sweater over his head, he loves the fact your clothes are oversized on him, you were always so embarrassed as a teenager saying it should be the other way around but Frankie had none of it, he insisted that you were beautiful and shouldn't change for anyone. he is snapped out of his daydream by you shouting if he was ok, you used his nickname "Cisco" which gave him goosebumps, no one has ever called him that apart from you, he is either "catfish" or "Francisco" to everyone else

"uh huh" he says back quietly before opening the door to see you've made a make shift bed for him on the couch which he smiles at. "here, have some water and medicine, it shoukd make you sober up quicker. also you take the bed ill take the couch, you need it."

"hermosa you don't have to give up your own bed for me, I've turned up to your house unannounced and you give me clean clothes medicine and a bed? I don't deserve any of this, the last two years have been hell, I'm addicted to coke daisy, I don't deserve a friend like you"

" look Frankie you have been my best friend since I was 12, you've helped me through such tough times now its my turn to take care of you, I know about the coke, Santi told me. I am going to be there every single step of the way I promise, I will get you into rehab when you are ready but until then I'm taking care of you ok?

Frankie is overwhemed with emotion and the only thing he can do is pull you into the tightest hug. he feels you rub his back softly, he wants to break down there and then but he knows he cant. " we will talk tomorrow I promise" he says into your hair.

[k-kkaren]

EX FACTOR

LOL sighs ..anddddddd action. When I tell you all this is probably one of my most anticipated blogs ever. I’ve seriously wrote this blog so many times (I’m talking all the way probably back to around when I first started writing blogs) and every time I get ready to publish it, I always back out. For one I know the emotions that come with this song for me. Once a young girl stealing my sisters Miseducation of Lauryn Hill cd to a woman in my late 20s now feeling exactly each word she wrote. Every time I hear the melodic chimes and piano in the beginning it creates such an emotion for me. Then to precede and say “It could all be so simple, but you’d rather make it hard. Loving you is like a battle, and we both end up with scars. Tell me who do I have to be to gain some reciprocity.(S/o to her for truly teaching us what that word means) See no one loves you more than me and no one ever will.”

As a woman, I truly understand how simple love could be. Relationships too. We didn’t say easy because nothings ever easy, we just said simple. But (whatever your preference may be) realistically they make it so hard. A lack of so to say. Lack of communication. Lack of accountability. Ego. Wounds in the way aka trauma. And. Straight up unwillingness. (Sidenote, I know I have a couple of guys who sometimes read these and the same things go for women.. i too have lacked in these areas as well and I’m woman enough to admit that)

“No matter how I think we grow you always seem to let me know,it ain't working…And when I try to walk away you'd hurt yourself to make me stay. This is crazy…I keep letting you back in. How can I explain myself? (I don't understand why) As painful as this thing has been. .. ” i don’t even sing that last part because I know I truly am capable of moving on. I’ve done it quite a time or two. It just takes me a min. But I get it who wants to in some cases.

Being very transparent with you all I don’t think I’ve ever been with someone but not with someone so much in my entire 14 years of being a dater. It’s like I would always be drawn in to stay somewhere where I know didn’t serve me purpose. But I also didn’t want to give up on it bc I always felt like we could grow. I once believed in wrong timing. I felt like too much time had been invested. I felt comfortable. I always tried to find the good(Bc in all honesty when it was good, it was good. My friends never saw that side so I get the stares and all the questions lol. I really do y’all.)

“See I know what we've got to do. You let go and I'll let go too. 'Cause no one's hurt me more than you. And no one ever will..” The hardest part but the part that warms my heart the most. We hate to let things go that mean so much to us, things that were once near and dear to our heart but it’s essential for progressing. I look at hurt like all the lessons of a lifetime that potentially made me into a better woman. A more guarded woman. A more cautious woman for sure, but never the less still a woman, phenomenally. And I try to pride myself on that.

Ex Factor - a tale of three different stages that I’m sure every single one of us have been through or may be currently experiencing.

The Ex Factor - a product of someone or something mattering but not so much anymore. And I’ll drink to that. With another month concluding, into the year that’s moving ever so rapidly so much of me knows that it’s a dire need to go ahead and get this out the way because all in all it has held me back in many ways. It’s crazy like I noted earlier I’ve seriously wrote this blog, tweaked it, deleted stuff from it since about 2020 and each time I felt something new. Today 4/30/2023 is the best I’ve felt about it in all these years. I say all of that to say, “it’s” awaiting.

As always, in all ways — Love and Light 💗

Twitter : _kforkaren

Instagram : kforkarenn

[theredtours]

Jingle Belle

With her hit album Red making her holidays bright, superstar Taylor Swift is looking at love--and fame--from both sides now By Shawna Malcom | Parade Magazine | November 25, 2012

"Need a shirt with my face on it? Taylor Swift is doing some Saturday afternoon shopping when she spots the tee, a cherry-red number that immediately takes her back to a much simpler time. "That's from, like, my 2006 tour," she says, running her fingers over its gently worn cotton. "That's... awesome."

The 22-year-old superstar loves pretty much everything about this particular Nashville shop, which sells vintage clothing, musical instruments, and a quirky curated selection of knickknacks out of a house with a wraparound porch where customers can take a break from browsing to sit for a spell. And with Christmas approaching, it seems like a promising place to start looking for presents. "I like to give gifts that remind people I know them," she says. "[Things] that I have a specific reason for giving them. I start thinking about it really far in advance."

In the back room, two men's sweaters catch her eye. "This would be baggy," Swift says, holding up a cream, cable-knit V-neck--but she doesn't seem to be shopping for a guy. "I'd wear it kind of off the shoulder."

Who says a girl can't holiday-gift herself? She certainly deserves it. Swift's fourth album, Red, is a blockbuster that moved more than 1 million copies in its first week, just as her 2010 album, Speak Now, did, making her the first female artist in Nielsen SoundScan history to hit that staggering mark more than once. Released last month, the boldly personal Red earned the six-time Grammy winner some of her best reviews yet, thanks to its lyrical maturity and ambitious forays into everything from earworm pop ("We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together") to U2-esque arena rock ("State of Grace"). Swift is no longer the wide-eyed country cutie pictured on that 2006 tour T-shirt; she's a savvy young woman who sees no reason to be boxed into any genre. "You have to force yourself," she says, "to evolve."

And how. The onetime outsider--a songwriting savant bullied by mean girls in junior high and overlooked by the guys she crushed on--has evolved into the ultimate insider, an entertainer Forbes ranks as the highest-paid celeb under 30 this year, with earnings of $57 million. She has more than 20 million Twitter followers, CoverGirl endorsed beauty, A-list BFFs (Emma Stone and Selena Gomez), and a couple hit movies (Valentine's Day and Dr. Seuss' The Lorax), and a growing list of high-profile ex boyfriends (including actors Taylor Lautner and Jake Gyllenhaal, musicians Joe Jonas and John Mayer, and, as breathlessly documented in the tabloids earlier this year, Robert F. Kennedy Jr.'s 18-year-old son, Conor). A performer who takes pride in being a role model, she will be honored next month by the Robert F. Kennedy Center for Justice & Human Rights for her commitment to social change, including advocacy against bullying and support for arts education and disaster relief.

So why can't Swift shake the fear that she'll somehow mess it all up? "I'm scared of this whole thing backfiring," she says. "Or chewing me up and spitting me out, and all of a sudden, I don't love it anymore."

She worries so much that, naturally, she wrote a song about it. "The Lucky One," a track from Red, tells the story of a performer that decides to walk away from stardom ("Chose the Rose Garden over Madison Square"). If someday it all gets to be too much, could Swift do the same? She doesn't have an answer for that, but she does know she puts "a crazy amount of pressure" on herself to keep topping her achievements. "My head's never really quiet," she says. "The only time I can get it to turn off is if I watch CSI or Law & Order, where I have to follow the crime. If I can't turn my head off during that, I know I've really got a problem."

"Nobody puts more pressure on Taylor than Taylor herself--in a good way," says Liz Rose, who has cowritten a number of songs with Swift, including the Grammy-winning "White Horse" and "All Too Well" from Red. "As amazing as she is now, she was that amazing at 14," Rose adds. "She's just a force. There are emotions you don't feel at 14 that you feel at 22, and her lyrics have grown with her."

Despite writing about it so prolifically, Swift claims not to know much about love. "I tend to think things are love and then look back and reevaluate," she says. How many times has she been in love? "I know how many people I've said 'I love you' to," she says. "I could probably count it up, but I don't feel like it.

"Part of me feels you can't say you were truly in love if it didn't last," she adds. "If I end up getting married and having kids, that's when I'll know it's real--because it lasted."

Trying to figure out which of Swift's songs are about which of her relationships has become a pop culture pastime. "When the guessing game starts, it's really funny," says the star, who always declines to name names (although Gyllenhaal is widely believed to be Red's central, fiery inspiration). "It's like, off to the races! I sit back and laugh and think, 'They'll never know.'"

Speculation aside, Swift's songs confirm that she has repeatedly felt burned. Blame it on the bad boys she often seems drawn to. "There's a really interesting charisma involved," she says of the allure. "They usually have a lot to say, and even if they don't, they know how to look at you and say it all. I think every girl's dream is to find a bad boy at the right time, when he wants to not be bad anymore."

She's the first to admit that her romances tend to develop--and end--rather swiftly. "I don't think there's an option for me to fall in love slowly, or at a medium speed. I either do or I don't," says the chart topper, who calculates that her longest relationship to date lasted six months. "I don't think it through, really, which is a good thing and a bad thing. You don't look before you leap, which is like, 'Yay, this is awesome! Let's not think twice!' And then you're like, 'We used to be flying. Now we're falling. What's happening?'" It comes with the territory when life moves as fast as it does for her, she adds. "I'm never in the same place for more than, like, three days at a time. Things can change from one minute to the next."

Not everything happens at warp speed though: "I don't get over people fast," she says. Nor does she expect to settle down anytime soon. "People think I want to get married really young--I don't know why. I'm a romantic person, but that doesn't mean I want to miss out on being in my 20s."

That includes making time for fun and snacks while writing songs. According to British musician Ed Sheeran, who cowrote Red's "Everything Has Changed" with Swift, a trampoline was central to the creative process. "We would take breaks in between lines of the song to bounce around and think of more ideas," he recalls. "Afterward she baked an apple pie. It was wicked."

For the most part, Swift has handled her first six years in the spotlight with a preternatural grace. In August, though, she hit a rare public relations speed bump--that Kennedy wedding incident, which she won't discuss ("It's been talked about enough")--and while she claims she doesn't read gossip about herself, she's now all too aware that everyone else does. "I don't know necessarily how much privacy I'm entitled to," she says when asked about the difficulty of living in the public eye, "but I know I don't get much of it. At the same time, I asked for this. I could be playing in a coffeehouse--I'd be happy doing that, [but] not as happy, probably. Knowing that people are going to hear the music I make is the most amazing feeling. Knowing that there are dudes waiting outside my house with cameras, hiding in bushes, is a less awesome feeling."

No one would accuse Swift, whose parents moved the family from Wyomissing, Pa., to Nashville when she was 14 so she could pursue a music career, of being ungrateful for her success. The loss of privacy, she notes, is "a small price to pay for getting to play stadiums." Still, there are days when she'd rather not deal with all that being Taylor Swift now entails. She travels with one or two security guards at all times because, as she puts it, "I have some crazies that are after me." As a result, she can't remember the last time she went anywhere by herself.

"I have some days where I get frustrated," she admits. "I kind of give myself this pep talk, like, 'Are you in the mood for lots of social situations and pictures? If the answer's no, stay inside.'"

Sometimes, just hanging at home with a little Chinese food and some crime-solving TV is exactly what she needs. "It's just like this sense of"--she exhales deeply--"no one is watching me, no one is asking me anything. It's calming."

Maybe one of these days Swift will get around to taking an extended break--although the mere thought turns the volume in her head up to 11. "If I took a break, would I stop writing songs so much?" she wonders.

Or maybe she'd wind up having even more to write about. Who knows? She doesn't--not yet. "I have so much to learn about life," she says. "I know nothing compared to what I'm going to know someday."

[heartoferebor]

18 and 20

18. Do you typically post multi-chapters as you write, or finish it all and then start posting? Would you like to change your posting method? 

I used to post them as I wrote, but in recent years I've actually started doing something in between - meaning I usually write them and once I am a few chapters in and have the rest of the fic mapped out I start posting! With most of my longer multi-chapter fics I like to adhere to a very regular posting schedule (the first day of the month, every two weeks etc) and having stuff written in advance gives me some breathing room with writing which I like. Especially this year where my private life is bound to be uhhhhh eventful. Currently I have only one big multi-chapter fic for this year planned where I'll probably use the same approach (the first chapter will hopefully go live on April 27th for a fandom event :)).

20. Any plans to work on original fiction this year?

I HAVE PLANS TO WORK ON ORIGINAL FICTION EVERY YEAR I have like three half-written novels on my laptop that are all screaming for my attention 😭😭. I'm not sure I will have any time to do much work on them though, unfortunately. I really wish I did. I would love for you all to meet all the funky creatures from my brain (there's the lil being who eats dreams and accidentally gets swooped up by a group of dysfunctional guardians of a forgotten goddess. there's blood-cursed ragtag group of people who keep getting randomly reborn until someone starts killing them all. there's the ultimate wlw-mlm solidarity royal couple who love and adore each other even when the perhaps-a-clone-perhaps-not returned-from-the-dead love of the king's life stumbles back into their life, grappling with his identity. And then there's Saetha, the OC I've had for 20 years who is literal fire and also a bisexual disaster woman in love with the gentlest man on earth). But yeah whilst I can conk out 100k of fic in less than 2 months I am apparently incapable of writing more than 20k in a novel. SIGH.

Ask me about future writing things!

[poetressj]

The Hurt I Feel (7.27.24)

after continuing on with this relationship because of the feelings that I had for him for over a decade only to find out that he was still playing in my face. Him & I had had a conversation about how we could better our relationship after all the things that we had done to each other throughout the years. & just when I thought we were getting it right; I found out that he has another woman in his life that is taking care of him because I am unable to do so at the moment. In the midst of our friendship up until this point, we agreed that we could move how we wanted to move despite the feelings that we had for each other (his physical actions always showed how he felt about me regardless of what came out of that man's mouth) . Because his thing was always, "what's understood does not need to be explained". Which I still think is a crock of bullshxt! Because if I am truly important to you, you will do right by me. Now, don't get it twisted, we both done did our fair share of bullshxt, but I got to a point in my life where I decided that I wanted peace & I wanted to do right for myself, because I was tired of going through the same shxt. I thought for sure that I would get that sense of peace with my best friend, but clearly I was delusional in that moment. (I am only writing here,because I no longer have room in my journal & won't get my new one until tomorrow!) I thought that because we were at our BIG AGE now, we would finally get this shxt right & do right by each other. He asked me to prioritize him, to sit my ssa down && when I do that he chooses to have me out here looking stupid once again. So how did I find out? My intuition told me to go on his facebook page; now I don't ever go on this man's page for nothing, but I listened to my intuition because it never lies to me. I seen that he had posted on his Facebook the beginning of this month. (the times that I did go on his Facebook page his post would be very sporadic). Under one of the post, there was a woman that wrote a comment saying, "that's all mine". & he LIKED THE COMMENT! I immediately saw RED! Because I'm sick of this man playing in my face when it comes to these women. At first, I tried to psych myself into believing that he only has a relationship with this woman to get what it is he needs out of her, but then I came right back to reality & asked myself what kind of conversations are they having with each other for this woman to feel comfortable enough to claim him as her man. I done been through so many females with this man & I was ALWAYS the LAST ONE STANDING because I truly gave a fxxk no matter what it is that he went through. Hell! even my own momma, couldn't try to convince me that he won't shxt!!! I was there when he was with women that he didn't give a fxxk about, chewed them up & spat them out!!! Dished out hella money on this man because I loved him, fxxked up relationships with men & women to be with him. & even though I never gaf what I momma thought about him (because she always felt that I was too good for him), I stood 10 TOES DOWN! I'm sick of him playing in my fxxkin' face! I made that man the godfather to my daughter: 1. because he asked to be & 2. because of all the time that I invested into him----he was pissed when he found out I was pregnant with my babygirl, but we over came that & we were just on the tip of starting a relationship together . I already owned my part on that. babygirl is my 1 & only kid (that was planned as only being cared for by me because I knew that her father was not going to play a role in her life---so it worked out how I wanted it to; I have no problem being a single mother because I don't have a good relationship with men anyways, hence this situation), while he has 3 kids w/ 3 different BM's. & he had them in his 20's knowing how I felt about him. I had my daughter LAST YEAR!

[quotesfrommyreading]

During a practice just three months into that initial semester, though, a teammate fell on Hardrick's right leg, eliciting a pop loud enough for the whole gymnasium to hear. He felt like he'd been struck with a sledgehammer and collapsed on the hardwood floor in pain.

Team doctors said X-rays didn't show a tear. They estimated Hardrick would only miss the first few games. But he didn't end up playing once the whole season. Or at the start of the next season. During practices, Hardrick felt shooting pains whenever he tried to run or jump. He says when he told his coaches about the discomfort, they said he wasn't trying hard enough. "I was in pain," Hardrick says. "I had to fight just to get though warm-ups."

That January, a year and four months after the injury, the phone rang at Valerie Hardrick's house. It was a woman from a medical clinic, saying the family owed money for an MRI their son had undergone the previous fall. Valerie said they must be mistaken—her son had never gone for an MRI. And she would know if he had. The administrator persisted, going on to say that the film showed a torn meniscus.

The family says that when they confronted the school, the staff disputed the results of the MRI and continued to maintain Hardrick had only pulled a groin muscle. Meanwhile, Hardrick says, officials began pushing him out. He recalls that the athletic director told him to start thinking about other options, saying maybe this wasn't the best place for him. He was no longer told about team meetings, he says, and then one day when Hardrick went to the gym, he discovered his keycard had been deactivated.

Spring break of his sophomore year, Hardrick used his dad's military insurance to get surgery on his own. The surgeon who did the operation told him the tear was so severe he had to remove 10 percent of the tissue, which had been flapped behind the knee, making it painful to bend or run on. When Hardrick, still determined to get back on the court, asked Oklahoma for a medical redshirt waiver, which gives injured players an extra year of eligibility, the family said the athletic director continued to deny the injury and, therefore, the waiver request. By summer, Hardrick resigned himself to transferring, and signed up for one last set of summer-school classes. Then in July, he received a bill for $3,500 and a letter informing him that the university had canceled his scholarship—effective at the close of the previous semester.

Since Hardrick had a decent grade-point average, many other Division I schools were interested. All he needed was for Oklahoma to give him a medical hardship waiver (NCAA rules say players must sit out a year if they transfer, unless they didn't play the previous year because of an injury). Although Capel was no longer coaching at Oklahoma when Hardrick lobbied for the needed paperwork, he wrote a letter to the conference officials supporting his claims that he was unable to play because of his injury. The athletic director, though, would only grant a medical hardship waiver if the Hardricks signed a release saying there was never an injury and they would never sue (records of the correspondence confirm this). The family declined.

So the 20-year-old ended up transferring to a junior college. He's since had two more surgeries on his knee and has moved up to a Division II college, Southern Nazarene University, where he hopes to continue his recovery and finish his education (Southern Nazarene is paying for his rehab). Hardrick still believes that if his injury had been addressed immediately, he might be playing in the NBA right now. "I don't love basketball anymore," Hardrick says. "Not after everything that's happened."

  —  'I Trusted 'Em': When NCAA Schools Abandon Their Injured Athletes

[gdevezacapstone]

To Make the Best of a Bad Bargain

Everytime I get asked the question “Why do you want to be in healthcare?”, I struggle to come up with an answer that can easily be understood by other people. Many factors influence people's decision to pursue healthcare. Some are following their parents’ footsteps, some are forced to enter this field, while some are genuinely interested in it. One thing that I know is that the common factor will always be the want to help and care for other people. Even as young as 10 years old, healthcare and medicine fascinated me. I dreamed of becoming one of the heroes you can find in the hospital hallways.

Dr. Jose Rizal decided to become an ophthalmologist because he cherished his mother very much. Just like him, my desire to be a doctor was also driven primarily by love.

To help people understand my answer, I would have to tell them the story of one of the most special women in my life, my mommy Emee. My grandmother was the most elegant and strongest person I knew growing up. She was classy, yet feisty. She knew who she was, and as a kid, I practically looked up to her. My parents both just got out of college when they had me. Fresh to the real world and in their early 20s, they needed help in order to give me everything that I could possibly need. I stayed with mommy and my lolo so my parents could go to work. She taught me, spoiled me, and gave me the emotional support a child away from her parents could ever need. I believe that having strong women influences in my life made me the strong woman I am today.

There came a time in which my parents were stable enough to be able to get a nanny for me. I moved from San Pablo, Laguna to Calamba, to fully live with my parents. At 7, my world revolved on school, making friends, and being on my computer. I wasn’t allowed to go outside and play with kids on the street, however, I had a computer in which an application called Encarta was downloaded. I can say it deepened my love for Science.

The 1 hour distance between mommy and I made it complicated for me as a kid to visit her. Summer breaks excited me because it meant spending time with her at San Pablo. The summer of 2010 would be the last summer I get to happily spend with her. 

She was diagnosed with Stage 2 Colon Cancer, early of 2011. I remember staying with her at several hospitals. She got transferred a lot - Laguna to Manila. The once powerful and radiant mommy I knew has gone unrecognizable. Though she physically looked weak and different, her mindset remained as strong as ever. The hospital visits to mommy piqued my interest in healthcare. The nurses and the doctors showed the most optimistic attitude in the darkest of times. The hospital room was depressing, but they entered it with glee - like there was nothing to frown and be sad about. They made the best of a bad bargain and took care of her until she was cancer-free.

Mommy was cancer-free for a few months until her cancer came back, stage 4, and aggressive. When you’re young, you don’t really know the depth of things. I assumed a woman like mommy would live forever. I told her I was going to be a doctor and help her be cancer-free again, like how her doctors have managed to do. A promise I never got to fulfill, as she was taken early of 2012 from this Earth. She wanted to spend her last days at home, not at the hospital and refused to undergo further treatment. Even at her deathbed, she remained the bravest woman.

I may never get the chance to fulfill my promise, but I can, in a way, still keep my words.

My heart was then set for healthcare. Fast forward to a decade after, a grown and more mature Gillan have actually read several articles about how doctors should avoid treating family members, including Rizal’s letter to his family back in 1894, in which he wrote: “I have operated on Mother with much success and she could see with much clearness immediately after. The postoperative course went well for three days, but encouraged by this, she did not follow my instructions and she got up and lay down alone, removed and put back the eye pad, always telling me that nothing was going to happen until her eyes became so inflamed (she suspected that during the night she received a blow)... The operative wound gaped, the iris prolapsed, and now there is violent inflammation. Nothing can quiet her and she reads and goes to bright lights and rubs her eyes. Now I can understand why it is prohibited for one to treat members of his family.” 

Either way, maybe I wasn't meant to help her. Maybe she was only meant to direct me to a path where I am needed. She already lived a very meaningful life and it was time for her to go that day.

I am now in my last year with my chosen pre-med course, Nursing. Nursing is undeniably a physically, emotionally, and mentally draining course but I always keep in mind the number of people I could help in the future. Much more, if I make it and finish medical school. I know I can if I persevere. Mommy’s powerful energy stays in this world, through me. 

Dr. Jose Rizal, our national hero, was a brilliant medical student, and I could only hope to be even a fraction of what he was as a student. He did well as an ophthalmologist and has managed to help even the most unprivileged people. I recently learned that he made sure to treat his patients and get paid depending on their income. It made me admire our national hero more. Even up to this day, the healthcare system is undeniably still flawed. Poor people consider healthcare as a privilege, not a necessity. When in reality, healthcare is a human right. I hope to be able to help and aid the unprivileged someday.

References:

Padilla, M. D. B. (2019, July 24). Yes, dr. Jose Rizal was a real ophthalmologist. Philippine Journal Of Ophthalmology. Retrieved November 9, 2022, from https://paojournal.com/article/yes-dr-jose-rizal-was-a-real-ophthalmologist/ 

[seekfirst-community]

"The King of the world will raise us up to live for ever." (Cf 2 Maccabees 7: 9-14).

"Some Sadducees, those who deny that there is a resurrection, came forward [and put this question to Jesus, saying, “Teacher, Moses wrote for us, If someone’s brother dies leaving a wife but no child, his brother must take the wife and raise up descendants for his brother.

"Now there were seven brothers; the first married a woman but died childless. Then the second and the third married her, and likewise all the seven died childless. Finally the woman also died.

"Now at the resurrection whose wife will that woman be? For all seven had been married to her.”

"Jesus said to them, “The children of this age marry and remarry; but those who are deemed worthy to attain to the coming age and to the resurrection of the dead neither marry nor are given in marriage.

"They can no longer die, for they are like angels; and they are the children of God because they are the ones who will rise.

"That the dead will rise even Moses made known in the passage about the bush, when he called out ‘Lord,’ the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob; and he is not God of the dead, but of the living, for to him all are alive.” (Luke 20: 27 - 38).

Sunday November 6th 2022 of the 32nd week of Ordinary Time.

Do you know that November is the month the Church prays especially for the poor souls in purgatory? The Church prays for the souls in Purgatory because the Church believes in the Resurrection of the dead.

Do you consider yourself one of "those who are deemed worthy to attain to the coming age and to the resurrection of the dead?"

It is Jesus' Resurrection from the dead that established the Church and raised it above all pagan religions in the Roman Empire in the first few centuries after the Ascension of Jesus and the Pentecost.

Therefore do not scoff at the idea of the Resurrection of the dead, eternal life, heaven and hell. Here is how Jesus responds to the Saduccees who scoffed at the truth of the Resurrection:

Jesus answered: "You are completely wrong! You don't know what the Scriptures teach. And you don't know anything about the power of God." (Matthew 22: 29 CEV)

A Baptist friend of mine asked me once: "Why do you Catholics pray to dead 'saints' and for dead people?" I answered him by pointing to our Scripture verse for today. God Himself says that "He is not God of the dead, but of the living, for to him all are alive.” Jesus silenced the Sadducees through this Scripture. My friend had no answer.

We profess this faith:

"I believe in the Holy Spirit,

the holy catholic Church,

the communion of the saints,

the forgiveness of sins,

the resurrection of the body,

and the life everlasting. Amen."

If you believe in the Resurrection and life everlasting, live as you believe. Live full of faith, hope and love like the Seven Brothers in our first Reading: “It is my choice to die at the hands of men with the hope God gives of being raised up by him; but for you, there will be no resurrection to life.” (Maccabees 7: 9 - 14).

In instructing the neophytes (new Christians), St Cyril of Jerusalem urged them to trust only in teachings of the Catholic Church:

“In learning and professing the faith, you must accept and retain only the Church’s present tradition, confirmed as it is by the Scriptures…. Now I order you to retain this creed for your nourishment throughout life and never to accept any alternative, not even if I myself were to change and say something contrary to what I am now teaching, not even if some angel of contradiction, changed into an angel of light, tried to lead you astray. For even if we, or an angel from heaven, should preach to you a gospel contrary to that which you have now received, let him be accursed in your sight.” (St Cyril of Jerusalem, Father of the Church).

If there is no Resurrection of the dead, then the Church has deceived billions of people for over 2000 years. St John Henry Newman said that what so many people have believed for so many centuries cannot be wrong.

"The King of the world will raise us up to live for ever." (Cf 2 Maccabees 7: 9-14).

Daily Bible Verse @ SeekFirstcommunity.com

[starbuckie]

𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠

pairing(s): college!peter parker x reader, dark!steve rogers x reader, dark!sam wilson x reader, dark!bucky barnes x reader

words: 8.1k words

warnings: DARK!FIC, SMUT 18+ (unprotected sex, foursome turned fivesome, gangbang, non-con/dub-con, daddy kink, oral M and F-receiving, spit kink, degredation kink, praise kink, creampie), age-gap (reader is in her early 20s), cheating, angst, there’s like zero fluff

summary: peter should’ve made it back to the tower for date night on time, or maybe just before he found his girlfriend being fucked by three other superheroes.

a/n: eee my first dark fic! im so so happy with the way this turned out, and even though it was a pain in my ass for nearly three months, im so hapy to share it with y’all. this idea was brought up by an anon from @mypoisonedvine’s saturday sleepover a few months back, but i switched up tony and sam bc i didn’t like the tony and peter stuff. hopefully my smut has improved from the first time i wrote it in january, and just a reminder that in no way, shape, or form do i condone rape of any kind. there’s a large difference from the page and the real world. i try to put all tw’s in the tags and warnings, but if there was something i missed please tell me. thank you to my lovely bestie @mermaidxatxheart for beta-reading(i have no fucking clue what i’d do without your help). feel free to leave a comment or two and reblog, but don’t repost anywhere or i will hunt down your ass. thank you again and please please enjoy <3

main masterlist || mcu masterlist || sebastian stan characters masterlist

Bucky wasn’t planning to fuck Y/N as soon as he saw her.

It started with a faint mention, something Tony had thrown around along the lines of, “Parker’s bringing his girl down here tomorrow, don’t be an asshole”. He didn’t give a damn what Tony said or how he acted around Peter’s girl. Years of being thrown between gruesome mind-wiping and being half-dead, asleep in a freezer would do that to a man.

So the next day when Peter brought his girlfriend in, he was scratching his ass like a fucking ape and downing a beer with a messy bun at the nape of his neck, until he actually saw her. Neat hair, even neater laces with a sweet smile but a body that could kill. Didn’t matter that she was bundled under Parker’s hoodie and a pair of jeans- he could always admire a pretty dame, but Bucky could see that she was beyond that. It was as if God had intentionally made the one being, the one ethereal creature beautiful and angelic enough to be a sin away from him, so that he couldn’t touch her. Because she was young, and in her twenties, and that shouldn’t have even been the first two things that popped up in his mind because she was also Peter’s girlfriend.

But then she had the audacity to stick her hand out, a shy grin and twinkle in her eyes as she gave her name. It sounded so pretty rolling off of her tongue, and he wondered what it would sound like while he groaned it into her cunt.

Y/N. 

So, yeah, maybe Bucky wasn’t planning to fuck her as soon as he met her, but it was pretty damn close after.

-

Steve Rogers was one of very few men who said they had the pleasure of banging nearly every woman on the north side of Manhattan. Bucky indulged in the fact that the man who had once been too shy to do so much as meet a gal’s gaze was now “a dollar whore”, but he was more than happy to keep that title if it meant he could continue to get off in the nearest woman’s mouth everyday. 

Every time he walked down the streets of New York with just a simple ball cap and jeans, he could feel stares on his back from what seemed like miles away, girls on every street corner just waiting for him to take her into the nearest public bathroom and fuck them dirty. CEOs, baristas, girls fresh out of getting master’s degrees with stars in their eyes and big dreams, until he shattered them by making them gag on his cock and scream his name into bedsheets. Or tile floors. He didn’t care as long as they were screaming. The girls of this century were just too delectable to turn down. He didn’t discriminate. His dick had been in women of every height, stature, hair color, and he had quite the variety throwing themselves at him as well.

And then Tony ruined it all and sat him down with a simple explanation that the image of Captain America was being tainted with disturbing stories of girls being fucked in the ass and thrown on their knees in dirty bathroom stalls. The blond was beyond pissed when the billionaire told him to stop dicking around, but he couldn’t do anything else if he wanted to keep his title and job. In a new century, even if he’d had a few years to adjust, he was still absolutely oblivious when it came to anything outside of aliens and sex. There was nothing left for him outside of being an Avenger, so reluctantly he agreed to keep his number of conquests to a minimum, and most definitely inside of the tower rather than out on the street.

However, inside of the tower seemed to be no problem at all when Peter brought his girlfriend over, all smiles and straight A’s, and that’s when Steve realized that he’d yet to fuck a bright, little college student. He could see himself stripping her from the innocence in her eyes, loosening up her pussy with his thick cock against the wall in his room.

Surely Tony couldn’t reprimand him for spending a little time trying to bond with Peter’s new girl, right?

-

Sam Wilson was a simple man. He had a job, a well-paid one at that, somewhere to live, a girlfriend, or a woman to keep him company, that’s for sure- but for once in his life he was seeking out something other than missions, something that would keep him busy when he was feeling bored, something like-

Pleasure, and he knew that he’d finally found what he was looking for the moment Peter brought his girlfriend through the elevator doors on the fifty-sixth level of the Avengers tower. She’d shaken his hand so daintily and spoke so politely that if he were to see her without any backstory, he’d think she was another innocent, dim-witted college student, breaking her bank account every Saturday morning and naively believing that her relationship would last longer than a few months. But by the things Parker had told him, she was much more than that.

Was it shitty of Peter to tell his teammates, the people he worked with, how Y/N was in bed? By the majority’s vote, probably, and by Sam’s strict conduct of his own morals, definitely, but when Peter’s girl looked like that and he was so incredibly bored with his routine? 

Well, fuck, Sam had never been happier that the Spider-kid had told everyone how his girl gave head.

Peter brought his girlfriend in daily after that, and every one of her visits, she grew less shy and more friendly, and the Falcon saw each of his friends gape at her growing comfortability with a wolfish demeanor. It started with the water incident with Steve in the kitchen, where he so clearly spilled water on her already thin, white camisole with intention. Sam couldn’t say he was upset though, after all Steve had offered him and the rest of the Avengers quite a show when he tried to clean up her shirt, taking his sweet, sweet time to fondle her tits as subtly as he could, his eyes staring at her pebbled nipples poking through the material. He could see Bucky hiding his boner under his cereal bowl on the couch that day. 

Then of course, he’d been no better than America’s sweetheart himself when he greeted Y/N with a hug that in hindsight, was a little too enthusiastic. His large hands squeezed into the pockets of her back pocket, and if the college student found anything weird with it, she didn’t say so, but Sam graciously palmed the round globes of her ass in his hands, feeling the muscle clench under his fingers. Oh, how he’d never hugged someone that tight ever before in his life. Maybe he would’ve gotten a bit further than squeezing her ass had it not been for his own girlfriend standing behind him, ready to introduce herself to Y/N.

Bucky, well, Sam could admit that Bucky had the most guts out of all of them. Though the super-soldier was normally well-reserved and polite, the dark glint in his eyes the day he met Y/N let him in on the secret that he had a much dirtier mind than most thought. It had been movie night that time, and he barely even tried to cover up how much he wanted the girl, his hands resting all over her as they watched Inception. Hardly a movie to get so riled up over, yet Bucky’s hand still inched its way up her thigh, his rough fingers gently carressing the flesh until they started to lightly trace the apex of her thighs. 

If she noticed anything then, she didn’t comment on it, doe-like eyes just marvelling at the screen in great intrigue. It was only when Peter’s arms wrapped around her a bit tighter did she scooch away from Bucky’s touch, with a small apology and shy grin. 

That only made his dick harder.

On the other side of Bucky, his super-soldier counterpart tapped his knee gently, forcing their blue eyes to meet each other. No words had to be said between the two, three men when they looked over to Sam, because they all recognized that look they saw in each other's eyes; predatory, dark, nearly voracious in the way they all wanted to be balls deep inside of Y/N.

And they would get there. No matter how long it took, they knew that the ultimate prize of tearing their prey apart would be more than worth the wait.

-

“Hey, babe, I’m gonna be a little late. Ned and I got stuck back in the lab, so we’re gonna need to stay until eight or nine. Can you make it to the tower by yourself alright?”

Peter’s concerned voice made Y/N smile gently as she trudged along the rainy streets of New York. He always loved to worry about her, especially when it was dark and gloomy out, but she could handle herself pretty okay. By pretty okay, of course meant she could kick ass like no other twenty-something year-old, but she wasn’t one to brag. Y/N readjusted the Kate Spade purse on her shoulder with her right hand, attempting to keep her umbrella over her head with the other. “I’ll be fine, Pete, just go finish up and get back to me. I’m gonna be waiting in your room at the tower before you go off on that mission this weekend.”

A small sigh came through the speaker, “Okay, I’ll try to get back to you soon. I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Pete.” 

“Oh,” she could hear the shy but no less mischievous smile that was taking over his face, “I left you a little present on the bed, make sure you open it before I get back.”

Y/N’s face heated at the implication. “Peter Parker, you dirty little-” He ended the call with a laugh, and she huffed out a small chuckle at his childish antics.

The walk to the Avengers tower would have been nice, had it not been for the downfall of rain, making everything mushy, socks being absolutely soaked through her sneakers by the time she arrived. The receptionist at the front desk, Jenny, if Y/N remembered correctly, stared at her a little oddly, probably not expecting to see the young college girl in such a state of disorder, but it didn’t affect her at all. She confidently strutted up to the elevator, pressing in the floor number where all the rooms were located. Y/N scrolled through her Twitter feed on her phone while classic rock blared through the elevator with the constant shuffling of people moving in and out. Seven minutes and thirty-two seconds later she was sprinting down the halls with soggy shoes and damp hair, her cold body screaming for warmth.

Peter’s room was the farthest down the hall, and the room was fairly empty. He rarely stayed at his room in the tower, preferring to stay with his Aunt May or keep Y/N company in Brooklyn. When she entered the room, she saw a plain white shirt and a pair of socks strewn upon the carpeted floor, but what really caught her eye was the red box wrapped in a pink bow on the bed. Deciding it would add more suspense if she opened it later, she quickly hopped in the shower, letting the hot water warm her freezing, rigid muscles under the spray. 

Peter didn’t have all the products she’d usually use before she knew they were going to have sex, so she had to make do with the half-used bar of Irish Spring and his small travel-sized bottles of shampoo and conditioner, promising the fresh, breezy smell of citrus and mint. It was a quick process; two squeezes of shampoo, shaving with the green soap as best as she could without cutting herself, one squeeze of conditioner. A fuzzy towel sat waiting for Y/N on the rack, with the Spiderman symbol as a prank gift from her to her lovely boyfriend, and without a second to let the heat leave her damp skin, she wrapped herself in it, quickly hopping out to the bedroom again.

The lingerie she set out on the bed was a deep set burgundy color, with lace decorating the delicate corset and the trim of the satin panties. The packaging really did not do it justice. Y/N grinned at the new set, one that she knew would happily be torn from her body later. A shiver ran through her as she let the cold air fall over her skin, carefully slipping the lingerie on. It was a damn shame, really; the set was quite nice, and she reminded herself to buy more of the nicely suiting color for their nights together. 

Click.

Y/N’s heart thumped with anticipation as she heard the door open and she took a quick moment to ready herself. Hair in perfect style, legs stretched along the length of the bed to make herself look as seductive as possible, a small smirk thrown on her pouty lips.

But in the darkened room, it wasn’t Peter’s shadow that appeared. Three men, three tall, bulkier men’s shadows appeared at the foot of the bed, and horror washed over her as she realized who they were. “Goddamn, dolly, I’ve imagined what you would’ve looked like under those sweaters, but this is much sweeter than I expected.”

The sinister face of Bucky Barnes came into her view, just a sliver of moonlight lighting up his pale skin. His eyes raked over Y/N’s uncovered skin, and goosebumps appeared as she tried to cover herself up under his predatory gaze.

“W-what are you doing here?” She whispered worriedly. Sam and Steve flanked the bed on either side of her, plastered sickly sweet smiles on their faces, providing her with a false sense of security that made her heart scream in fear. Though she wasn't making any noise, her lungs felt like they were going to give out, her throat closing up like an allergic reaction. 

Her head whipped every which way in robotic movement, her brain seeming to fail her as she scanned the room for an exit. Several moments of shortened breaths, cold air chilling her body, before she came out of her freezing shock to realization.

“Why are you here? Please, get out, just g-get out!”

A calloused hand pushed away Y/N’s left arm that covered her tits, and Steve groaned at the sight of her pebbled nipples. “God, baby, they’re as pretty as I thought they’d be. Been trying to feel them up all week, but you knew that, didn’t you?”

Saturday the week before at lunch when he’d spilled water over chest and tried to clean her up. Sam’s friendly hug that became a bit less friendly when his hands slipped into the back pockets of her jeans. The movie night on Monday when Bucky’s hand caressed her thigh a little too close to her core. All of their touches began to make more sense, and her eyes filled with tears at the realization. 

“Please,” she begged, tears blocking her vision, “I promise I won’t tell anyone, not even Pete, but please just go.”

“You just don’t get it, do you?” Steve asked. He grasped her chin roughly, his face close enough to hers so that she could feel his fiery breath on her lips. “We’re not leaving, sweetheart. You’re gonna let all three of us play with your pretty little body, and you’re gonna make the prettiest sounds for us, alright?”

Y/N shook her head violently, too afraid to make noise, but also bold enough to make one last attempt at freedom. The hand that held her chin quickly moved to slap her cheek, and she hated the way the sting made heat stir in her lower belly. She tried to shy away from their touch again, but Bucky’s face simply held the same smirk as he trailed his vibranium fingers up and down her leg. 

“Oh, come on, Y/N, don’t act all shy now. Peter has been telling us how good you’ve been to him and don’t think he hasn’t told us about your little childhood crush on little ol’ me. Been wanting to fuck you ever since.” Bucky’s hand quickly left her body, instead moving to palm over the bulge in his pants. “Fuck, sweetheart, got me real hard just thinking ‘bout your pussy swallowing my cock. Bet you’re gonna be a sweet, obedient girl for me, right?”

Fire started to course through Y/N’s veins, and with all the power she tried to dampen it down with, it seemed to push through her body that much more dangerously. She despised the fact that she could feel herself growing wet for the three older men, but God, she had never felt the need to be filled up as badly as she did in that moment.

“You’re a bit of a slut, don’t you think?” Sam mocked. He kneeled on her right, his eyes fixated on her panty-clad pussy, a wet patch already forming on the soft satin. It really didn’t help that three of her teen celebrity crushes were eyeing her nearly naked body like a piece of meat. “I mean, look at you, already growing wet and needy for three cocks. Is that what you want, honey? Parker not treating you good enough?”

She hesitated. Goosebumps rose across her skin at the sinister tone of his voice, like he already knew it was true. And it was true and she hated that Sam was right, but as amazing as Peter was a boyfriend, it was clear from the vibrator hiding in his apartment’s bathroom that he was not amazing in the sheets. Every time, she held hope that it would be better, that she would finally get to stop faking an orgasm before he rolled out of the bed with a filled up condom, but she knew deep down inside of her that it wasn’t happening anytime soon. Y/N forced herself to nod weakly at Sam’s questions, and Bucky chuckled. “Oh, you poor dolly, we’re gonna have so much fun with you. Treat you better than that little boy ever could.”

All it took was a whimper, a nearly audible, deadly silent whimper that managed to squeak its way past Y/N’s throat, and the three men took it as permission to ravage her body however they pleased.

Steve made quick work of his pants as Sam lifted her chin to kiss him, his tongue hot and heavy against her mouth, coaxing her lips open. The sound of belt buckles hitting the floor shamefully turned on Y/N even more. Panic coursed through her senses, her mind wanting to scream for them to stop, but her body knew her too well as she felt a wave of slick run down her thighs. Cold metal digits slipped under the waistband of her panties, moving to her wet folds, and she whimpered into Sam’s mouth at the touch. 

“You look so nice, baby, so pretty all laid out for us like this.” Bucky’s hands pulled down her panties as Steve pinched her peaked nipple through the lace, laying lavish, open-mouthed kisses down her torso. The cool air hit her pussy when Bucky’s hands pulled her legs wide open, fully exposed to the three men ready to use her against her will. “Knew you’d be so wet for us, sweetheart, just look at you. Dripping all for your daddies,” Steve murmured against her skin.

Hot breath fanned over her cunt before they rolled her over on her stomach, someone’s hands forcing her up onto her knees with her face smashed into the cotton pillows. She could feel two rough human hands pulling her ass cheeks apart, spreading her ever wider for their view. “Would you look at that, boys, look how fucking hot she is for us.”

Sam’s thick finger ran through her folds, the calloused pad of his finger just teasing her clit before landing a harsh smack to the inside of her thigh. Her moan was muffled through the mattress and she prayed they wouldn’t hear how being treated like whore made her wet like nothing else. 

Hot slick dripped down her thighs, a pool of it staining the pristine sheets by each knee. It was quite a sight, Steve, kneeled by the bed as his face hovered next to her ear, whispering filthy things into her ear as Bucky stroked his hard, leaking cock right next to him. Sam’s lips were making their way up the inside of her right thigh, cracked skin gliding across her sticky flesh. “Oh, baby,” he purred, “you smell so good. Bet you taste even better, don’t you, little girl?”

His tongue reached the apex of her thighs, finally licking a stipe up her center with no warning. Y/N sobbed into the comforter below her, mascara stained tears marking up her face. Two fingers edged their way between the bed and her face, forcing her head upwards and arching her back. Steve’s face was caught in a dirty smirk above hers, lip pulled taut between his teeth, until he saw the tears trailing down her face. “Oh, sweetheart, you look so desperate like this.” His fingers traced her smeared lip gloss around her lips, before opening her lips harshly. “Open up, you dumb baby.”

Y/N forced her jaw open wider, just enough to watch a string of Steve’s saliva drip into her mouth. The thick spit pooled on her tongue and she tried hard not to grimace in front of him, in hopes that he wouldn’t make her- 

“Swallow it, sweetheart.” He saw the hesitation in her eyes, how her lower lip trembled at his words, but he just laughed at her. “Now.”

The warm saliva slid down her tongue and more black tears ran down her face as she obliged his orders, finally gulping it and cringing at the taste. Steve loved the way her face screwed up in displeasure, how she still had the audacity to pretend she hated what they were doing though she was moaning and whimpering with Sam’s tongue attacking her entrance.

“What do you want, sweetheart? We might give it to you as long as you use your words.” Bucky taunted lightly.

Y/N stared up at the brunette, staring menacingly down at her with his cock in hand. “Please,” she whimpered.

The three found it woeful, the way she could barely get a full sentence out as Sam went to town with his skilled tongue, but even with that onslaught, a simple please wasn’t enough for them.

“Please what, honey,” Sam moaned from between her legs, “you gotta use your big words or we’ll never know what you want from us.”

Steve and Bucky nodded in fake-agreement even though they all knew exactly what she wanted and where. 

“I don’t-” her widened eyes glanced into Steve’s, blown-out and teary. “I don’t want anything, not from you.” She lied through her teeth harshly.

Sam removed his head from between her thighs and Y/N immediately whined at the loss of contact almost hilariously. “You don’t want anything, little girl?” 

The air felt static, every hair on her neck rising in the pressured silence. The angel and the devil clawed at her heart, each trying to show her what was right. And she wanted to sin, God knew that she would love nothing more than to let that little greedy part of her take over, but she’d already cheated on Peter and that damn good part of her conscience stole the wheels of her brain.

Slowly and shamefully, she shook her head, though the downright dirty monster inside of her wanted the men to ignore her words and keep assaulting her body. 

“That’s a shame, baby, I thought we were having fun.” Sam sighed. He met Bucky’s gaze on the side, and though they seemed to be in resignation with her wishes, their eyes twinkled devilishly. He positioned his body over Y/N’s kneeled over form, his bare chest glued to her sweating back as his hands ran up the sides of her ribcage and to her front, just barely grazing over her sensitive nipples. “You mean, you don’t want me to touch you here?”

He pinched the darkened buds and she had to use every ounce of self-restraint to not collapse at the sensation. His calloused hands moved back even further, tracing down to the stretch of skin just above her mound, swiping a finger across the skin delicately. “How about here? Or even,” he brought three fingers around her body, over her ass, and into her glistening cunt again, just rubbing along her entrance, not daring to go further in. Y/N couldn’t hold in her reaction to his prodding anymore, his teasing chipping away all of her dignity and pride in a few simple touches. 

“Yes, please, please, use your fingers,” she blurted against her will. Where shame should have washed over her, there was only lust, raging red and coursing through her body so forcefully that she felt braindead. “Put your fingers in me, daddy, please.”

The pet name rolled off of her tongue so easily and she was barely ashamed of how it made her feel. The name especially shocked the three men, who smiled even wider with their cocks harder than before at the little slip up. “That was all you had to say, dolly, gonna have your daddies make you feel real good,” Bucky laughed.

Sam finally plunged his thick fingers knuckle-deep into her cunt as Steve’s mouth captured hers, effectively swallowing her scream with ferocity. The long digits scissored and swirled inside of her, pressing against new unexplored areas that she’d never even gotten to with her own fingers. White dots danced along the front line of her vision as teeth clashed against hers and though it’d been mere minutes she already knew she was close and the men did as well.

“I can feel you clamping around my fingers, honey,” Sam taunted. His lips were moving sinfully around her ass, planting sloppy kisses and drooling all over her skin while he fingered her deep. “Are you gonna come soon, baby?”

“Yes, daddy, I’m so- fuck,” Y/N panted into Steve’s mouth, “m’ so c-close.” The blond bit her tongue hard enough for her to taste blood and she yelped as she heard Sam and Bucky laugh. 

“Watch your language, dolly,” Bucky sneered from the side of the bed. His hand was rapidly moving around his cock, corkscrew motions edging him towards the brink of pleasure. 

“Little girls like you don’t get to use big swear words,” Sam’s face was still buried between her legs, his soaked fingers pulling out of her cunt only to rub at her little pearl of nerves in circles. His tongue still lapped at her dripping entrance and he could feel her tight hole start to pulse as her breathing picked up. “Oh, baby, you’re getting close, aren’t you?”

Y/N was hesitant to answer at first, the sweat on her body seeming to cool immediately in fear of what would happen if she messed up. But after five seconds Steve stopped kissing her, gripping her chin and staring into her eyes deeply. He looked as debauched as she felt, with his rosy lips swollen with spit and cheeks tinged with pink. “Are you gonna answer daddy, sweetheart?”

That knocked her into shape real fast.

“Yes, daddy, I’m so close. P-please let me come,” she whimpered. The whine in her voice pleased the two men, and Steve went back to exploring her mouth before she felt something poking against her asshole.

“Gonna let daddy put his cock in you, little girl?” Sam asked gently. His words had panic coursing through her system, a chilling realization like water being poured on her head and she began to wiggle around, trying to free Sam’s hand from her hip. Her arms weakly pushed at Steve’s chest, trying to push him as far away as he could, but the men only laughed at her flailing limbs. Y/N wanted to scream no to them, and despite her contrasting love-hate relationship with Sam’s fingers inside her cunt she knew it was time to go. It was laughable how much she would continue to say that to herself for the rest of the night. 

But Sam managed to sense her panic, knowing exactly what the issue was before harshly spanking her and effectively stopping her struggle. “Don’t worry, baby, I won’t come inside of you. I’m not risking knocking up a whore with my kids, I’ve got more dignity than that.”

He led the leaking tip of his dick down her crack, rubbing it along her slick entrance before pushing in with a groan. “Oh my fucking God, that is so hot.” Bucky admonished from the side. “Gotta get in on that soon.”

Steve chuckled against Y/N’s lips, pulling away with a strand of saliva connecting them. He adjusted himself up so his dick was centimeters from her face, a knee propped up on the bed for balance. “Gotta wait your turn, Buck, we all want a piece of her.” He noticed the way Y/N’s eyes were transfixed on his cock, the red mushroom head smeared with precome along the slit, nearly purplish veins standing out prominently on his shaft. Yeah, he couldn’t even deny that he was big because he already knew how many girls had dropped down on their knees for him. “Go ahead, sweetheart, open up those pretty lips for me.”

Almost too excitedly, she dropped her jaw, allowing him to slide his cock into the silky warmth of her mouth. As his hips started to thrust into her mouth, Sam’s started to do the same into her cunt. Both men moaned in tandem with their movements as Y/N’s worries faded away to the back of her mind as they stuffed her to the brim.

“You can come now, baby,” Sam nearly ordered, “go and cream on daddy’s cock- fuck, I know you’ve been waiting.”

It was a harsh bump of his head against her G-spot that sent her over the edge, walls clamping down with ferocity and milking him for all she was worth. Y/N reeled in the sunlight infested warmth that coursed through her body as she finally let go, whining around Steve’s dick as he continued to abuse her throat with long, deep thrusts. 

Bucky was still holding his orgasm off, fondling with his tight, heavy sac while his dick remained a painfully hard mess, glistening with precome. “I’m so glad I got to see you come, dolly, look so fucking pretty when you do.”

She couldn’t deny the little skip of her heart at the praise, just a few simple words that made her feel like a good little girl. But no, God-fucking no, she wasn’t supposed to let them make her feel this way. Guilt washed away that warmth in her chest just as quickly, knowing that her boyfriend was just waiting to come back to see her, finishing up his studies so that they could live their lives out together after college while she was getting her pussy and mouth absolutely wrecked by his co-workers. 

As soon as Y/N got her brain thinking straight again, Sam started moving inside of her again and she garbled out a strangled cry. “If you thought we were done here, baby,” Sam laughed, “you’ve got a lot left ahead of you.”

“We’re not leaving until all of us have come, brat.” Steve’s palm gripped the back of her skull roughly, pushing her head so far down on his dick that her nose was squished against his abdomen. “Greedy little bitch.”

Both men started to thrust into her again, and just like that she was back to being absolutely lost in desire and lust like the bitch in heat she was until there was a sudden shift in the air. So much that the sweat on her body began to cool her skin, Sam’s hands still gripping her hips so tightly she knew they’d leave marks that she would have to hide when she wore her favorite low-cut shorts. 

Bucky’s eyes seemed to drift from her tits moving with each movement of her hips, checking behind the door as if there were something lurking there, but she was too afraid to see for herself. If she stopped she would get spanked, and they’d probably prolong her second orgasm even further, and her pussy couldn’t handle any more subtle teasing.  

“Hey there, Parker, why don’t come on out here?”

But that, that was what made the hairs on Y/N’s neck rose, dread filling her to the fullest as she realized the implications of Sam’s words.

Peter had seen everything. Peter, her boyfriend, had seen three of his co-workers, three men who she barely knew, fuck her deep into his mattress. Peter, her boyfriend, had watched her get fucked into his mattress, without trying to stop them whatsoever.

She couldn’t tell if it was the guilt of cheating on her boyfriend or the freezing realization that he hadn’t done anything to stop the three men that hurt more. 

Yet Peter still walked from behind the door, dressed in a NYU hoodie and a pair of khakis slung low on his hips, just drawing attention to the sizable bulge that stretched out his zipper. His umber eyes, normally full of so much joy and love, were possessed by the same lust and darkness as the three men, as much as he tried to hide it behind a shyer facade. 

His eyes were trained on the tightness of how Y/N’s pussy was gripping Sam, her lips glossed over with come and spit wrapped around Steve’s dick. The girl stopped in her movements, her eyes no longer full of tears for just being gagged, but as soon as her mouth came to a halt around the base of his cock, the blond slapped her across the face. A sharp crack echoed around the room and though she couldn’t see him, she heard Bucky’s feral growl of pleasure at the whorish treatment she was receiving. 

“Didn’t say you could fucking stop, sweetheart, keep working on daddy’s cock.” No more words needed to be said as Steve gripped her hair once more, forcing himself farther back into her throat to the point where she couldn’t breathe. Sam’s thrusts were quickening, closer and closer to release as the sounds of the girl struggling to breath made his balls tighten. 

“Fucking shit, baby, you feel yourself squeezing my dick? I bet you like teasing daddy like that, don’t you?” One of his hands were brought down on her ass in a quick smack that resonated with Bucky, who was staving off his orgasm for something much sweeter than his hand. She was moaning raucously around the dick stuffed in her mouth, the vibrations sending jolts of pleasure up every nerve in Steve’s body as he came with the tip of his dick nearly being swallowed by Y/N’s throat. There was barely any time for her to fully down the thick come in her mouth before Sam was threatening to orgasm. “I’m gonna come so soon but you better fucking not, little girl, you hear me? Gotta let your daddy come before you, you ungrateful little bitch- oh.”

It was a really fucking close call, Sam’s dick pulling out of her with one quick movement before spilling pearly ropes of come onto Y/N’s spine. A high whine escaped her mouth, clit throbbing as she was so, so close to coming, and she was too far into her crazed pleasure to realize that she was letting three older men, men who fought to defend the universe from evil, use her as an over-glorified fleshlight. 

She couldn’t really blame them for calling her a cockdrunk whore. 

Bucky sauntered over to the bed, eyes trained on the pool of come centered around the base of her spine before flipping her over onto her back with his large hands and shoving three vibranium fingers back into her hole. She gasped and held onto his forearm as he continued to fingerfuck her to her second orgasm, eyes screwed shut in a delirious haze of contentment for being filled with at least something again. 

“Bucky, Bucky, Bucky, please-” Steve slapped her along the face, correcting her words immediately. “Daddy, daddy, please let me come.”

Bucky chuckled, tweaking one of her nipples with his flesh hand as he hovered over her face. “I don’t know, dolly, you’ve been a little naughty, callin’ me the wrong name, not listening to Stevie’s orders- don’t think you deserve to get what you want.”

A muffled whimper escaped her swollen lips, and he sighed in surrender. “Okay, dollface, go ahead and come on my fingers. Let me see how you wet ‘em up real good.”

Y/N’s hips bucked into his metal digits with finality, come leaking out of her cunt and soaking the sheets below her. Her sweat-glazed skin shone even against the darkening sky, and all Bucky could do was chuckle at how her chest rose quickly as she tried to catch her breath. He thought about teasing her clit again, just circling around the little bud of nerves to get a rise out of her, but he decided against it. Sam probably had better plans for her anyway. 

On the other hand, Y/N’s orgasm was starting to wear off as she noticed the hardened stare from the edge of the room. Her boyfriend.

“Peter, I…” Y/N made eye contact with him, suddenly noticing how mousy he looked in his own bedroom. 

“I nearly forgot you were here, Parker,” Sam smirked darkly. “Why don’t you come over here and fuck your little whore. I’m feeling a little generous today.”

Steve and Bucky nodded with the same infuriating smugness as Sam. The brunette boy opened his mouth to object to the degrading statement, but when he met his girlfriend’s eyes nothing needed to be said. There was no escaping this. Nothing he said mattered to the three older men, because really they had already gotten everything they wanted right in front of their disgusting, perverted eyes. 

He unbuckled his belt, letting the weight of it drop his khakis to the floor. Maybe if he’d known he would be forced into join a fivesome later that night he’d have picked any other boxers but the Ducktales one, but no one seemed to say a word about them, rather focusing on what they were failing to conceal. 

Peter’s cock had always been admirable to Y/N by its length and God, definitely its thickness. Curved upwards towards his abdomen with a vein running along the left side up to the bulbous head, it was definitely more than average. It was really just a shame he didn’t know how to use it well enough.

His shirt was pulled over his head just as quickly, and if Y/N knew any better she would say that he was excited to get to fuck her in front of the three men. He placed himself in between Y/N’s parted legs, standing in the same position as he had so many times before.

But when Y/N cried out in pain and pleasure as he slid into her, Peter knew that this time, it was different. This time three men, men that he used to trust with his life, stood on either side of him and his girlfriend and jerked their hands up and down their cocks as they watched her get fucked relentlessly. It wasn’t sweet, it wasn’t romantic, but he couldn’t really think when his thick cock was stuffed inside of her stimulated pussy, juices and come leaking out of her abused sex. 

“Go faster, Parker,” Steve instructed, his face contorted in pure pleasure. The pace of Peter’s thrusts sped up, and he threw Y/N’s ankles over his shoulders, hitting deeper inside of her, with the sound of her sobs only turning them all on more. “Oh, right there, shit, shit, shit-”

Steve came first, a low groan escaping his lips as streams of come landed on her tits, still bouncing with every movement of Peter’s hips. 

“Open up,” Sam gritted through his teeth, and Y/N obediently opened her mouth to let his bitter come coat the inside of her throat, some of it landing on her face and neck. The string of curses he let out made Peter thrust even faster into her, and he hated, absolutely despised the way it turned him on to see the three men use his girlfriend to their pleasure. But soon enough a hand pushed against his chest away from Y/N and he reluctantly pulled out.

“Move aside, kid,” Bucky instructed, “Wanna come inside of her.”

As he lined his gigantic cock up with her entrance, her eyes widened with fear. “No, please, I didn’t take my pills, I can’t- I won’t, please not inside-”

“Shut the fuck up, you slut.” Bucky’s fingers came to slap her clit harshly, and she cried out in pain. “You’re gonna be quiet and let me come wherever I damn want, right?”

He punctuated his last word as he thrust inside her, filling her up to the hilt with his girth. She was too drunk on the feeling of her cunt being filled up to argue again. It was painful, extremely so, even though two different cocks had been inside her overstimulated pussy already and Bucky stretched her out wide, his cock thicker with veins to hit every pleasure point. With her legs tossed around his tapered torso, he slid out until his very tip was left in her, then slammed back in with a small moan. The head of his cock relentlessly pounded into her cervix in a nearly soundless tempo and all Y/N could hear were her own gasps of pleasure, jaw-dropping moans that made drool slide back down her throat in her laid down position.

She turned her head to the side, and though her vision was bleary through the tears, she could see Sam and Steve watching Bucky fuck her while Peter, her boyfriend, her sweet, sweet boyfriend, was caught up fucking his hand to the sound of Bucky’s balls slapping against her ass. 

“Fuck, ‘m not gonna last much longer, dollface.” Bucky gasped. “You gonna come soon? You’re gonna come for daddy one more time. I think you’ve got a third one in you, you little fucking slut.”

“Shit, shit, daddy, please ‘m almost there,” Y/N wailed absentmindedly. A thumb came down to circle her clit quickly and she felt the coil in her stomach grow tighter and tighter, until she finally let out a high whine, finding her release as Bucky’s cock pulsed inside of her, ready to come just as easily as her. Her pussy clenched around his cock as she rode out her orgasm, fingers grasping at the sheets in order to find some sort of grounding. His come painted her walls white, and Bucky could’ve sworn there was no better feeling than feeling his blood warm in every vein as he finally let go. With stunted groans, his hips slowed its rhythm, lost in watching how his cock disappear into Y/N’s pussy, her slick juices coating his dick each time he pulled out. 

“Ah, fuck, dolly, you did so good for me. Pussy tight as a fuckin’ vice.” Bucky hugged her limp body close to his sweaty chest, letting his dick soften inside of her for a good few moments before pulling out. He tossed Y/N back onto the bed below him, barely even caring to clean the come dripping down her ribcage and out of her cunt before grabbing his boxers from the cabinet next to the bed. 

Steve was already buttoning his jeans up, checking the notifications on his phone before shoving it back into his pocket. The blond seemed to have better things to do so soon after, rushing his way to the door before pausing where Y/N laid to watch come drip out of her pussy. One more time he pushed Bucky’s come inside of her abused entrance, watching as it oozed out from behind his digits. “Look at you, fucking full of of his come. Such a goddamn whore,” he muttered under his breath.

Those were the last words he said to her before patting Bucky on the shoulder and leading him out of the opened door. 

Maybe Sam was a bit more kind, or affectionate at least. He was already dressed but visibly hard again beneath the thick denim of his pants, and he made sure Y/N knew it, taking her left hand and placing it over his dick. “You still got that effect on me, honey, even when you’re all fucked out like this.” He dragged his fingers through the thick ribbons of come that coated her chest, bringing them up to her mouth so she could taste. Even though she was more than exhausted, she wrapped her tongue around the two fingers that were pushed past her swollen lips, sucking them clean with a tired vengeance. Satisfied with her work, he kissed her chin one more time before leaving without so much as another word, slamming the door shut on his way out.

Click.

It ended exactly the way it started, the lock jostling into the doorknob just as easily as the high of Y/N’s final orgasm slipped away.

Stifling silence suffocated the room around them. Peter refused to meet her eyes, just as much as hers did his. She laid motionless on the bed with him standing at the foot, his dick soft and if she narrowed her bleary eyes just a bit, she could see how his knees were shaking. Neither of them were able to say anything, losing the ability to converse as soon as the three men left the room.

“Peter,” her voice was throaty after the rough fucking she took, “C-can you please get me a drink?”

The brown-haired boy looked down to meet her face, and she could finally see the reason that he had hid it from her. His eyes were red and bloodshot, snot running from his nose with tears running down his cheeks. She’d been so caught up in the after haze of the sex that she didn’t even notice how his bare chest was heaving so deeply, nearing hyperventalation. 

But still, he grabbed his boxers, pulling them over his weakened legs clumsily. “Y-yeah, what kind do you want, Mr. Stark has a ton-”

“I don’t care.” She cut him off firmly, a sharp tone in her voice as she rolled over on her side. Y/N tucked her knees to her chin, fingers running over the side of her neck which was marked with bruises and scratches. “I don’t fucking care.”

Without another word Peter slipped out of the room quietly, knowing better than to try to talk to her about what they had been forced to participate in. It wasn’t as if there was much to say anyways.

Rain pattered against the window. It was only six o’clock in the evening. Cars honked and beeped and Natasha’s Igor Stavinsky record played for its fiftieth round of the day, and to anyone else in the tower it was a normal night. Normal, just like the ones spent sitting on the couch with Bucky’s hand creeping up her leg or Sam’s hands groping her ass, but this time they’d made a move. 

The silence was far too much to handle, the unspoken truth of what she’d done with Bucky, Steve, Sam, and Peter finally hitting her, knocking the air out of her lungs as she suddenly struggled to breathe. Gripping her face, clawing at it like a goddamn wolf, Y/N began to cry. Silently at first, gradually growing into heartbroken sobs, she let her trodden pride carry her voice wherever it wanted to go. 

The men’s whispered words haunted her mere moments after they’d left the room, but most audibly she could hear a faint husk of a voice, Sam’s low moan in her ear looming in the dreadful silence of the room:

Thanks for sharing with us, baby.