#their mistakes and work to fix them even if they’re imperfect

[libraincarnate]

astrology notes: 19 ☼𓂃𓃗𓂃

quick note: i'm absolutely not an astrologer. these are just a collection of some observations, thoughts, theories, and personal experiences based on astrology. with that being said, i'm still learning along the way & i may come back to edit this post to make corrections. above all this is just for fun. lastly, keep in mind that i’m not reading your birth chart and i know nothing about you. these are just some possibilities that may or may not apply to you. enjoy!

˚♡₊ pisces & them not knowing if something they remembered was from one of their day dreams or an actual dream they had.

˚♡₊ moon or chiron in the 2nd house can indicate an emotional eater. they can be someone who eats for comfort or just because they're bored.

˚♡₊ virgos are known to be judgmental towards other people & things but they’re judgmental towards themselves as well, being that they typically struggle with perfectionism. for this reason, they probably cringe at themselves and the things they’ve done quite often. they can be quite regretful and hard on themselves when they make a mistake. but virgo, you guys are imperfect just like everyone else who has lived and died. and although it may be easier said than done, breathe, live, and just be. try to view as your mistakes as an opportunity to learn & improve.

˚♡₊ asteroid juno (3) in 4th the house can make people think you’re the type to bring home to meet their mom/family. 

˚♡₊ uranus in the 2nd, 5th, 8th, and 11th house can cause the native to feel frustrated and experience disturbance in those areas of life that are represented by those aforementioned houses. that’s because uranus is a planet that represents constant change and unpredictability & those houses are fixed houses that represent exactly what the name suggests, it’s fixed, it desires stability and regularity.

˚♡₊ capricorns are known to be controlling/bossy but aquarius tends to have those characteristics too. i’ve often seen it happen with their friends, like they can be the leader of the group and tell people what to do or they make decisions for others. i guess it’s the saturn influence since we know that cap is ruled by saturn & aquarius is traditionally ruled by saturn too.

˚♡₊ those with gemini moon are the type to laugh at themselves while they’re crying. and if they’re not, then they’re definitely going through it because it’s often hard for them to take themselves seriously like gemini risings, but in this case it’s more focused on their emotions.

˚♡₊ those with their venus aspecting saturn could be the type that always has a loved one/former loved one, like an ex, coming back even if it’s 6 years later. the person that tries to come back may realize what they had a little too late, they may realize that the loyalty & love you gave them was one of a kind and it’s hard for them to find that same or similar level of stability and commitment elsewhere.

˚♡₊ scorpio risings are lowkey mad funny because of their gemini in the 8th house, but especially if they have planets like sun, mercury, or moon there. & because it’s in the 8th house, it’s not something that many people know about them except for those that are close to them or those they have 8th house synastry with.

^ but when it comes to those with a gem rising or gemini in the 10th house, everyone thinks/knows they’re funny. 

˚♡₊ uranus dominants or those with uranus in aspect to mercury/neptune may really enjoy reading/watching sci-fi & dystopian books/movies or tv shows.

˚♡₊ taurus moons are typically blessed with the ability to remain calm & grounded but their emotions can be a bit stubborn and linger for a while. it may take some time for them to get over a breakup or separation from someone they really love.

˚♡₊ those with chiron, pluto, or mercury retrograde in the 5th house or 10th house could have stage fright. they may dislike doing presentations in school or at work. if they have to do something in the presence of others they’d rather it be in a group. but even if they are in a group, like a small choir, they’d prefer to stand in the back or behind others.

˚♡₊ the house where aries or mars falls in your chart can show you the type of men you usually attract:

in the 1st house, if you’re a girl you may attract men who you’d describe as the male version of you, or men who are childish or younger than you.

in the 3rd house it could be your classmates, those in your neighborhood, or those that you see as more of a brother, even if they’re not related to you. for this reason, you may be quick to friend zone them.

in the 6th house it could be the men at your place of work who are always hitting on you or trying to flirt. or men that have an unexplainable desire to take care of you, they may see you as a damsel in distress.

in the 10th house it could be older men who are already established or successful. maybe you easily attract sugar daddies or men that just want to provide for you whether that be money, opportunities, or guidance.

in the 11th house your male friends may be the ones crushing on you or you attract men from all walks of life, meaning you might be "everyone's" type. even if you're not the type that some of these men may usually go for, they could be willing to ignore that when it comes to you.

in the 12th house you may have a lot of secret admirers and men that often day dream about you but won't tell you.

the attraction could be stronger or more noticeable with mars making aspects to planets/asteroids like venus or eros or with venus or eros also in aries. & due to the characteristics of mars, these men may find you intimidating and they could be a bit scared to approach you at first, or they could come on to you a bit aggressively, or they just try too hard to get your attention.

if you read this until the end i hope you enjoyed it & thank you so much for reading. ♥︎♥︎♥︎, those hearts are for you.

[saevus-brutalis]

last art this year

was supposed to be for pride month but— ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── 𝓉𝑜 𝓉𝒽𝑒 𝒷𝑒𝓉𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝒻𝓊𝓉𝓊𝓇𝑒.

some lore surrounding these two that is too long overdue but 🤷‍♂️

not as detailed and rambly as i’d like it to be, but i’m really burned out and i’m trying to get back to it🧍‍♂️

nevermind it’s pretty rambly lol

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

all the way back in 2038 Vincent and Ray, after dating for around two years, agreed to leave California together on august 21st — Ragan’s birthday; it was supposed to be his birthday gift of sorts, a start of a new chapter, new life;

buuut Vince, being a little shit teenager, got cold feet (in Ray’s eyes, Vince always justified that as being rational) and ditched him last minute, not showing up in their agreed spot, making Ragan leave on his own after hours of waiting.

this caused Ray to despite his own birthdate, it always reminding him of the heartbreak and betrayal. 🧍‍♂️

Vincent has felt guilty ever since, but firmly believed it was the right choice. he was never fit to live a nomadic lifestyle at such a young age.

four decades later their paths cross again and a long healing journey ensues.

so now this date is pretty bittersweet to both of them 🧍‍♂️ but it gets better overtime

basically right person, wrong time

although i think if they did ran away together then, it wouldn’t have ended good at all 🤷‍♂️ with Vince still being pretty immature emotionally, still struggling with some inner personal things (family stuff, internalized homophobia, etc.) and not familiar with the nomadic culture and ways of living. they’d probably get in bad fights more and more as the time would go on, and eventually split. Vince would’ve decided to go back to Night City probably (if he ever would make it back) and they’d never end up back together has they met in the future.

their separation allowed them to grow and mature on their own, in their own familiar environments, experience different things, and after they met again, after all those years, they put their feelings and mutual attraction to the test

and it turned out they still want each other even with all the imperfections 🧍‍♂️(i’m not crying you are) they could lie all they want but their brain chemistry couldn’t. Vincent never loved someone they way he loved Ragan, and Ray never quite felt the same way with anyone else like he felt with Vince. there was always something missing, something not quite right. and while they could tell each other they’re looking for something too far out of their reach, that they’re looking for a too perfect partner, in reality they always just wanted each other 🧍‍♂️

they still have a lot to work on together in their relationship, but now that they’re too old for teenage fights and too tired for heartbreaks, they make compromises and their fights make their bond and their understanding of one another stronger 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️

like we acknowledge that Vince did a shitty thing by ghosting Ray, going no contact and being a puss, too scared to man up, and tell him face to face ‘hey i can’t go, this type of thing ain’t for me’. he didn’t want to acknowledge that, saying that out loud, or even in his mind, would make that real and that scared him. he was definitely a teen who’d rather avoid doing something he wasn’t comfortable with to not experience the uncomfortable feelings altogether. the avoidant type we all know and love 🧍‍♂️

and yet Ray still chose to love him 🧍‍♂️ he’s definitely like ‘this man’s trash but he’s *my* trash’. Vince gets better eventually after Ray finally gets through his thick ass skull.

but also i’m not gonna sit here and say Ragan fixed Vince coz that wasn’t the case 🤷‍♂️ this is not a ‘i’m gonna fix him’ type of situation. Ragan wasn’t and isn’t perfect either, his perspective was kinda askew as well; can’t quite describe it as i haven’t psychoanalyzed him as much as Vincent but they’re both flawed, make mistakes left and right and learn from that (sooner or later) like human beings 🧍‍♂️

but in the end they’re just old men in love

[threewaywithdelusion]

I’ve been seeing the Jamie Forgiving His Dad debate and I think it’s really interesting.

A) we don’t know if he forgives his dad. All we know is that he visits him in rehab. Maybe they fight. Maybe Jamie decides he can’t be around his father because his dad finally making an effort is too little, too late. Maybe James Tartt falls off the wagon.

B) I don’t hate it as an ending because it feels true to the characters. If I were Jamie, would I forgive James Tartt? No. Do I think people should always forgive their abusive parents if they learn from their mistakes and try to be better? Also no. Do I think Jamie Tartt, as a character, is the type of person to give his dad a second chance even after everything his father put him through? Absolutely yes.

Do I think Ted Lasso is the type of person to tell Jamie to forgive his dad even though that’s arguably terrible advice? Also absolutely yes. Ted believes in second chances, even when people don’t deserve them.

Watching Ted Lasso, I was thinking about Buffy. (Haha yes, the day I don’t relate something to Buffy you will know I have been replaced by an alien lookalike).

Anyway.

In Buffy, Giles says “To forgive is an act of compassion, Buffy. It’s not done because people deserve it. It’s done because they need it.”

In some places, Ted Lasso executes that idea really well. It’s Ted forgiving Rebecca for sabotaging Richmond for a whole season because “divorce is hard.” It’s Ted telling the police that he gave Beard his car. It’s Ted never holding Nate’s betrayal against him, even though it hurt him deeply and personally, and welcoming him back with open arms.

It’s Ted, it’s Ted, it’s Ted.

Of course Ted told Jamie to forgive his father. He couldn’t ever have done anything else.

Also featured in Buffy is the idea that “redemption is a process, not an event” (to quote Mark Field in Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Myth, Metaphor, & Morality). This idea shows up again and again, but especially in the characters of Angel, Faith, Spike, and Willow.

One grand gesture is not redemption. Promises are not redemption. Redemption “is fighting. It’s hard and it’s painful and it’s everyday.” 3.10

So no, I don’t think James Tartt has been redeemed. I think he can be. If he tries really, really hard every single day for the rest of his life, then maybe he can be redeemed. He can’t know he will succeed and that’s part of the point: to struggle and fight to be good, not to win back Jamie’s affections or to be considered a good person, but because it’s the right thing to do.

(Doctor Who now: “Goodness is not goodness that seeks advantage. Good is good in the final hour, in the deepest pit, without hope, without witness, without reward.”)

Redemption is Jamie apologising to his teammates, not being a bully again, and actually passing the ball. A (much flimsier) redemption is Nate giving up the glory that he’s chased at everyone else’s expense and going back to being Richmond’s kit boy.

Redemption is not Isaac attacking a homophobic fan because that is an Event, not a Process. (If he wants redemption, he’s going to have to work harder and keep working, but I do have faith that Isaac will get there).

One of the things I like about Ted Lasso is that the characters are imperfect. Always. They work on themselves and try to be better people and they’re still imperfect. When the story ends, Roy is still the kind of guy to get into a fistfight over his ex-girlfriend. Jamie is still the kind of guy to use a leaked sex tape like a weapon when he feels threatened. Rebecca is still the kind of woman who shields herself against a relationship that could really hurt, because she's been burned before. Ted still hides his emotions behind humor and forgives people who don’t deserve it. Beard goes back to Jane.

Do the characters end up better than where they started? I’d say overall, yes. Have they fixed all their flaws and overcome all their struggles? Absolutely not.

All that to say, I like that Jamie went to see his father. Personally, I think that's going to go terribly and James is going to let him down again. I don't think James Tartt deserves forgiveness or a second chance. But Jamie has to be Jamie. And Jamie was always going to forgive his father the second James Tartt showed the slightest hint of trying to reform himself.

[enneagram-reblogs]

A few things to know about Type One.

From NineTypesCo by Steph Barron Hall.

Common Underlying Motivation: To be good

→ This motivation is not about being the best, and it’s often not even about perfection. Instead, 1s are aiming to find a deep sense that everything is good: all is well in the world and in themselves. The good they are seeking is about virtue, integrity, righteousness (but not self-righteousness), and fairness, and it contains warmth, balance, and the flourishing of all of humanity. For some 1s, pushing toward a standard of excellence and perfection feels like one way to get there, even though that’s not what they’re ultimately seeking.

Frequently Avoiding: Being "bad" or being the last to know when they're wrong

→ 1s often have a fear that they are somehow irredeemably corrupt or deficient, so they work incredibly hard to avoid this. They are also so keenly aware of things being imperfect that their inner critic might pop up and remind them of allllll the imperfections. Then, when someone else points out an error, they’re not the last to know they were wrong.

You might not know that…

→ Not all 1s feel like perfectionists, in the traditional sense of the word. Many 1s are more concerned with fairness, accuracy, ethics, and clarity than they are with “perfectionism,” but it can easily be labeled as perfectionism from the outside. 1s frequently feel a lot of pressure to make things right, to make things better, and to reach a standard that may or may not be possible.

→ Most of the time, 1s genuinely want your feedback, and they’d like to hear what you think, especially if you’re in a relationship with them. They want to be the best partner/friend/sibling/etc., but it can be difficult to hear feedback when their inner critic takes it and runs with it. Being extra gentle, while still being clear, is always appreciated.

→ Many 1s spend a lot of energy ensuring they are appropriate. The anger or rage they feel beneath the surface about all the things that are wrong in the world feels inappropriate, so they work to repress it, and it often leaks out as resentment and frustration. But anger isn’t necessarily a bad thing! Anger gives energy, helps set boundaries, and offers willpower to make the world a better place. When 1s become more able to feel and release their anger, they can use it for good.

→ We all think of 1s as industrious, idealistic improvers, but there’s more to them! They can also be fun, excitable, silly, and spontaneous.

→ Sometimes the pressures of life weigh on them, and they feel responsible to fix everything. In this mode, it’s really difficult for 1s to loosen up and have fun, but that fun side exists!

→ 1s can be very black-and-white about a lot of things in life. Often, this is a tool they’ve needed to keep themselves in line. If there are strict boundaries around right and wrong, they can move through life without too much angst, as long as they stay inside those boundaries. This helps them stay free of mistakes and ensures they won’t be harshly punished (by themselves or others). Most of the time, 1s who want to grow are working to step out of this rigidity, but it’s a long process to learn that while these skills have been necessary in the past, they might not be helpful for the future.

And BTW…

→ 1s have deep emotions, and even if they’re not always able to articulate them, they exist under the surface. It sometimes takes time to be able to express what they do feel rather than what they should feel.

See the image version of this post!

[showtoonzfan]

At this point, I think the major problem with Stolitz….or…just Stolas and Blitz as characters in general is just that they’re NOT “flawed characters”, like everyone keeps freaking saying, they’re honestly just horrible people and nothing else, and the fandom can’t see that. I of course know that in Viv’s world, characters like Stolas and Blitz……sigh…..were born in hell and were innocent uwu beans until something bad happened to MAKE them into the people they are now, but it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t excuse their actions in the present. I really believe though that the fandom doesn’t really know the difference between being “flawed” and just being a shitty person all around, at least in this scenario. For example, Stolas not learning how to love, or understand his daughter is his imperfections. He cares about his daughter, but doesn’t understand or is able to listen to the stuff she’s interested in, referring to how he thought she would be interested in going to Loo Loo Land, even though she’s a teenager now with other interests. This is something that would make him flawed, he’s not perfect, and he’ll make mistakes. What’s important is LEARNING from those mistakes and growing, and yet, neither him nor Blitz do any of that. Octavia and Loona seem to just be the tools for these two characters, something so the writers and fandom can go “B-BUT THEY’RE NICE TO THEM!”- yeah….and what else do they got going on for them? Nothing.

Stolas may care about Octavia, but he didn’t care enough to actually try to fix the relationship with his wife, or even his daughter for that matter. He also didn’t change anything regarding his scandal with Blitz, treating him like a plaything the entire time. He then just went right back to fucking him in episode 5 until he got called out for his bullshit, and even when he DID, he acted like victim. Blitz meanwhile treats his employees like utter shit, as well as his past partners, and when he comes to Loona he’s overprotective when she’s a grown woman. Still, the way Blitz and Stolas feel towards their daughters don’t excuse anything. They’re both horrible people in their own ways at the end of the day, and they need to stop pitying themselves and actually work to be better. I think the fandom doesn’t realize that you can have redeeming qualities as a person and still BE a horrible person, cough…Bojack Horsemen. But yeah I’m tired of the fandom and writers babying these two characters and excusing their actions, acting like they’re hopeless beans who don’t know how to love or communicate, therefor they’re just “good people deep down”- like….no.

[mejomonster]

i really do appreciate novels like silent reading. (i mean for a lot of reasons but like also) seeing an adult romance between flawed people, and those people managing to communicate and cooperate and have a happy relationship as flawed people is so important. there’s a lot of focus nowadays on ‘healthy’ relationships in media. and i do think it’s important, especially in teen and young adult media where communicating healthily and showing firm boundaries shows their audience what healthy relationships should look like. but also? 

seeing Heartstopper, and Charlie having anxiety that does make him doubt he’s lovable? that’s important. Real people don’t come into relationship perfect. Real people come into every relationship in life: family, friends, coworkers, lovers, as imperfect people who carry the baggage of every unhealthy coping mechanism they developed from childhood or past hurts to survive, of every injury they went through in life and survived and may not even be aware they still carry those hurts. Charlie could be aware he has self esteem issues, and self hate that’s undue. But he could never be fully aware of how much that might play out into him sabotaging his own relationship with Nick, into pushing Nick away and emotionally isolating, into blaming himself for imagined ‘bad things’ he’s done when really he’s not to blame. real people Are Imperfect, and seeing Charlie doing his best but still making some mistakes is realistic. Seeing him and Nick resolve it with support and communication is wonderful, is realistic, is how real people who are Always Somewhat flawed build healthy relationships and resolve issues when they inevitably crop up.

Silent Reading is also a case like this, although a more extreme adult version with of course murder and higher unrealistic stakes. But Fei Du? He is a man with ptsd, that causes him to rely deeply on unhealthy coping mechanisms and to delude himself to such an extent he is not even aware of the full scope of his trauma and is not doing concious work to fix it. He’s convinced himself it’s not there, he avoids it, he suppresses his emotions, he numbs himself to his own feelings. He’s functioning, to a large degree, from a place of trauma and heavily relying on coping mechanisms that are harming him to some degree and will Eventually over the course of his life need to be worked through. Now, this doesn’t make him irredeemable. He’s a young adult, and honestly a lot of young adults come into adulthood carrying a huge amount of childhood trauma or baggage from formative relationships and have no idea they’ve even got trauma affecting how they act. Then it’s a lifetime of work to realize that it’s negatively effecting them, and to work on making more conscious healthy choices for themselves, and healing. It’s a lifetime of work, and a young adult shouldn’t be expected to already know all the ways they’re hurt and may be carrying that baggage in their actions. Lots of young adults DO go into relationships, all kinds, at that age With all that baggage, and still things turn out fine. Sometimes they turn out bad, and the person learns and realizes they had some unhealthy coping mechanisms (like numbing to their emotions and unsure how they even feel, tolerating people violating their boundaries, lashing out at others when hurt, running when emotionally vulnerable, clinging and acting controlling when emotionally vulnerable, etc could be a million things). And the person recognizes X, Y, Z went wrong and they’ll improve that area for the next relationships they have. And again and again. Until one day they have a friendship or romance or whatever, and X problem comes up again (like say running when they feel too emotionally vulnerable) and this time they communicate what’s going on, or the other person says they feel abandoned when it happens, and the two talk and because they communicate they get through that temporary reaction fine. They stay together. And wooh, isn’t that the goal! Being able to work through issues as they arise, and keep our relationships where everyone involved has their concerns addressed and feels heard and understood to the best ppl can understand each other. And eventually, people get Better at doing this as issues crop up. Eventually, when its a solvable issue this is the norm. And when its a serious incompatibility issue or someone is harming another, things end, and that’s better for all involved too. 

So like. Fei Du? He’s an ordinary young adult with baggage he isn’t even aware of. And in real life, tons of people form all kinds of relationships while coming in at that level of awareness or less. And the thing is? For all that, in Silent Reading the relationship still goes okay. Because Luo Wenzhou is willing to ask questions and have conversations when he’s unsure of things. Because Fei Du does try to meet him halfway, does not leave (and he Does actually leave and run sometimes! and yeah, for some people that will end their relationship. That’s learning from one’s past actions to carry into the future. But Fei Du is lucky, and it doesn’t happen to end his relationship. And you know? some people in real life do get to keep their relationship after a few mistakes). My point is... its the trying. It all comes down to: are the people in the relationship trying? Are they trying their best to live up to the actions they promise, do they try to meet each other halfway, do they try to actively understand each other? When mistakes are made do they communicate and work on them. Real people aren’t perfect, they are always some degree of messes. That doesn’t mean good healthy relationships are impossible. That means people try and grow through their whole lives, and if a relationship works then both people are trying to do what’s healthy, trying to understand each other and trying to address their unhealthy coping mechanisms when they do crop up and affect things. And even with all that, sometimes things don’t work out. And that’s okay. You live and learn.

(And on a related note... I could definitely go in for ages on Tao Ran and his own unhealthy coping mechanisms and how interesting they are. How he can salvage a friendship but he self destructs any romantic relationships. How its a fear of dying on someone, abandoning someone, hurting someone, so he’d rather no one cared about him at all. How Silent Reading is very I think mature in how it shows the various kinds of people and how they Aren’t Perfect but they are trying... or not in Tao Ran’s case, and how people try and things turn out however they turn out. Like? Luo Wenzhou? Objectively he is probably Too Forgiving in a romantic relationship, and in all his relationships tbh as we see with Yang Xin. But he also sees Fei Du almost as a child to protect which makes his unconditional forgiveness come from a place we understand more, meanwhile for Fei Du... the level of his distancing means if it was anyone who Wasn’t so adamantly there for him, he’d let them go. And that’s not really healthy either, Fei Du’s frequent attempts to lash out and push Luo Wenzhou away to make him abandon Fei Du, to fulfill Fei Du’s own fears, another way to self sabotage good things in his own life and play out a reinforcement of his abandonment issues. My point is like... they do Some things i’d think could be dealbreakers in another relationship. I’d certainly run from a partner doing either Luo Wenzhou’s continuing to maintain a relationship even when boundaries crossed or communication refused or his partner pushes away and his controlling supervising nature, or Fei Du’s lashing out and pushing away. But in their world where one could be a killer, these extremes make sense for who they became, and in their specific dynamic you see why For Fei Du the controlling nature’s oddly a positive of Luo Wenzhou and makes LWZ appeal in an opposite way to what Fei Du fears, and why for Luo Wenzhou and his view of Fei Du as his responsibility like his own kid makes his unconditional forgiveness make sense for him. It’s this kind of nuanced exploration I like seeing. Real people aren’t always As messy as these two lol, but real people Are Imperfect and imperfect people can find ways to form good relationships. Because ultimately that’s what everyone alive is doing.)

[echoesfromafterlife]

My thoughts started to drift randomly through various subjects, past events, and so I found it interesting to come here and write. Not that anyone will read this, but just as a reminder. Usually, it’s not about me—my texts, poems, songs, or whatever it is I write—they’re often about others’ influences or love, feelings. Although, there’s a lot of me in it too, and maybe I’m just here rambling, killing time. Anyway. I think these past days, I’ve been reflecting a lot on how much my life has changed, often in negative ways, but also positively. I’ve been thinking about all my mistakes, my achievements, and how proud I am of who I’ve become, despite sometimes having setbacks. I also believe I still have a lot to learn—obviously—and that’s never going to stop, which is one of the things I admire most about life. I really find it beautiful how human connections and our relationship with nature teach us so much, how they influence me, and I’m happy about that.

Once again unable to sleep because of insomnia, I was browsing the internet and found a video of two fathers talking… man, it was one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen. I was really moved, and one of the things one of them said was that every time he looks at his child, he feels the urge to become a better person for that little one. And, of course, he’s made plenty of mistakes in life, but that wouldn’t stop him from moving forward and growing. Even though I don’t have a child and have no idea what that feels like, it touched me somehow—probably because I’ve never been great at dealing with my mistakes, big or small—and it made me see that it’s okay. A new beginning isn’t the end of the world.

I don’t know if any of this makes much sense, but what I’m trying to say is that this year has been so tough for everyone, you know? And throughout my life, I’ve carried this self-imposed pressure to always be perfect and say the right thing, and I’m definitely tired of it. I’m grateful to those two guys who will probably never know how deeply they touched me.

There’s something freeing in that realization, isn’t there? The idea that growth doesn’t mean perfection, that mistakes don’t mean failure. It’s almost like letting go of a weight I didn’t even realize I was carrying—this constant pressure to be flawless, to always have the right answer, to never falter. And maybe that’s what’s been holding me back the most: the fear of being wrong, of making mistakes that might define me. But, after seeing those two fathers speak, I felt something shift. I understood that it’s okay to not always know the path, to stumble sometimes. It doesn’t make me any less worthy or capable; it just makes me human.

I think I’ve spent so much time trying to live up to impossible standards I set for myself that I forgot to actually live. To embrace the messy, imperfect parts of life that, in reality, are what make it beautiful. So, from now on, I want to approach things differently. I want to let myself breathe, to make mistakes, to learn from them instead of being consumed by them. I want to be kinder to myself in the same way I try to be kind to others.

And maybe, that’s the most important lesson I’ve learned this year—that it’s not about being perfect. It’s about being present, about showing up for yourself and others, even when things get hard. It’s about allowing yourself the space to grow, to evolve, and to accept that it’s okay to be a work in progress. In fact, that’s what makes life so rich: the process of becoming. I still have so much to figure out, and I know there will be more sleepless nights, more moments of doubt.

And maybe that’s all I’ve ever needed—to let go of the idea that I have to be anything more than enough. There’s a quiet kind of peace that comes with that realization. It doesn’t mean I’ll stop striving to be better, but the urgency to fix every flaw, to chase perfection, it’s fading. I’m learning that being enough isn’t about settling; it’s about accepting where I am, knowing I can grow from here without losing myself in the process.

In a way, this acceptance feels like a form of freedom I’ve never allowed myself before. It’s giving myself permission to make room for joy amidst the chaos, to appreciate the little victories instead of always focusing on what I didn’t get right. It’s funny how we often forget to celebrate the small things—the quiet moments of progress that don’t scream for attention but deserve recognition all the same.

As I sit with these thoughts, I realize that life is never just one thing. It’s not only hardship or only joy; it’s both, mixed together in ways we can’t always understand. It’s the late nights where I can’t sleep because my mind won’t stop running in circles, and it’s the mornings when the sunlight peeks through the curtains, reminding me that a new day is always possible.

I guess, in the end, that’s what I want to hold onto—the belief in new beginnings, in the chance to keep growing without having to get everything right all the time. And maybe that’s what those two fathers were really talking about: not just being better for someone else, but being better for yourself. Allowing yourself to evolve, not out of guilt or pressure, but because you want to. Because you deserve it.

So here I am, writing this down, as a reminder to myself. Not to anyone else. A reminder that it’s okay to be in progress. It’s okay to not have it all figured out. And most importantly, it’s okay to be proud of how far I’ve come, even if the journey ahead is still uncertain.

05:31 a.m.

[riahchan]

Have you ever had to teach on Zoom?

IT’S SO HARD.

I try to go through things one on one with them, but I feel like I can’t teach this way. Do I just push through that and instruct with my knowledge?

Do kids think they’re dumb when I correct them? I don’t want them to think that. I encourage. I do it nicely and reassure them, but some kids make a lot of mistakes, and I don’t think it helps them by being too nice and not correcting them?????? Help!

it is so hard! it's hard to keep kids engaged and participating and to connect sometimes!

I think, as long as you are encouraging and positive, the kids won't feel bad if you have to correct them... especially if you model how to make a mistake and correct it!

(you don't even have to make a purposeful mistake if you are anything like me, I make them often enough... but sometimes it is fun for the kids to "catch" you in one so you can fix it)

it's also important to model being flexible and able to change plans... things don't work all the time, especially when you have to depend on everyone's computers and programs and websites to work, so modeling flexibility explicitly can help

it's most important for the students to know that you, an imperfect human, cares! building the relationship of trust goes such a long way to smoothing over things like having to correct them or making them do a non-preferred task!

good luck! teaching is soooooo difficult but can be soooooo wonderful!

[paintingdublin]

Kitchen Cabinet Painting Mistakes Dublin Homeowners Should Avoid

Painting cabinets is a project that homeowners can do themselves, but it requires more attention to detail than painting a wall. The key to getting great results is understanding how the process works and ensuring you prepare the cabinets correctly beforehand. If you choose to do it yourself, you might make some mistakes that can be costly, especially if you don’t have ample experience.

Here are some of the common mistakes you should avoid when it comes to kitchen cabinet painting:

Painting Without Priming

Priming is a necessary step when painting cabinets. Primer helps the paint stick to the surface and provides a smooth finish that will make your cabinet drawer pulls pop. You’ll want to prime all surfaces where there is wood or metal touching another surface (such as drawers). You should also prime if you plan on applying a high gloss or low-lustre finish coat over top of your basecoat.

If you have time before painting, let the primer dry for 24 hours before applying the first layer of paint. This gives it time to dry thoroughly and makes sure that your new paint job lasts longer by avoiding any issues with bubbling up due to trapped moisture under layers of paint.

Not Cleaning the Cabinets First

In order to avoid this, you’ll need to ensure that your cabinets are clean and free of dirt, grease and grime. It is also important that you use a good quality cleaner so as not to damage the finish on the cabinets.

Remove all handles, knobs and doors before cleaning them with a soft cloth in order to avoid scratching them or damaging any of their surfaces.

Failing to Fix Any Imperfections Before Kitchen Cabinet Painting

Failing to fix any imperfections in the cabinets first is a common mistake that homeowners make when painting their kitchen cabinets. If you don’t address these imperfections before painting, the paint will show up those flaws and make them even more visible. It’s much easier to fix these imperfections before painting than after—and it might save you from having to repaint entirely!

A few examples of things that could ruin your perfect cabinet colour scheme:

Cracks in the wood or other dings and dents on doors or drawers

Water marks, which are very noticeable once painted over

Coat of Paint is Too Thick

When applying paint, it’s best to apply multiple thin coats rather than one thick coat. A good rule of thumb is to allow each coat to dry completely before applying the next one, which may take several hours or even an entire day depending on the humidity in your home. Applying too heavy of a coat will leave you with drips and sags that make it look like you’re trying to cover up some kind of bad workmanship; but if you apply two or three thin layers, this won’t happen!

Thin coats are easier to apply because they don’t drip as much when being brushed on; plus they dry faster so you can get back out there sooner! And finally, thin coats give you the smoothest finish possible which makes for a much nicer looking surface!

Not Using Painter’s Tape

Use painter’s tape to protect surfaces that will be damaged by paint. Painter’s tape is not a substitute for a brush, but it can prevent small drips from happening and save you hours of cleanup work later on. Make sure to place the tape in a way that makes it easy to remove after painting is finished; if you just slap the tape down, it will be very difficult—or even impossible—to get off without damaging the surface below.

Painting cabinets is a bit different than painting walls. The main difference is that they’re made of wood, which means they’re porous and can absorb paint. Because of this, you’ll have to be careful not to apply your paint too thickly or it will drip down the sides of your cabinets (and make you look like a messy amateur). You also need to make sure that your cabinets are completely dry before applying any kind of topcoat or sealant, otherwise it won’t stick properly and could peel off later on down the road.

In conclusion, painting cabinets can be a huge time-saver if you use the right products, clean everything well beforehand and make sure you don’t skip any steps. It’s also important that you choose paint specifically formulated for kitchen surfaces so that your cabinets will stay in good shape over time. If possible, get an experienced professional to do this job for you so they can ensure their work will last as long as possible.

Are you planning to have your kitchen cabinets painted? Our experienced professional painters can address your queries and concerns. Call us today at 086 608 1817

[when-all-hope-feels-lost]

i love all of the kotlc crew and the deuteragonist boys but can we remember that sophie foster is our main character, the leading lady, and honestly one of the better female protagonists in the middle grade/ya fantasy genre

[dikanamai]

There're many things in Encanto that means A LOT to me, in a very personal level, but something very, very important (perhaps the most important aspect of the whole story) is something I've seen a lot of fans refuse to understand or even acknowledge: an essential part of the nuance that surrounds the Madrigal family is no one wants to leave.

Leaving is something that never crossed Mirabel's mind. Bruno left without leaving because he didn't want to leave. This family holds itself together because all of them love the family and want to stick together, even if things aren't perfect, even if they have problems and struggles. And they love each other not because all of them are brainwashed; it's because life is a complex thing, relationships are a complex thing, people are a complex thing, LOVE is a complex thing, and the movie made an awesome work portraying it.

I'm not here to defend toxic environments that harm people, but what many people here need to understand is having problems is not the same as being a super abusive family that destroys its members just by the mere act of being together. Sometimes things can be fixed, and people have the right to decide if they want to stay and fight to fix them. Going away and sending everyone to hell is not always the answer. If you hate the concept of "family" for whatever personal experience you have, it's ok, your experience is valid, but please, please, at least acknowledge it is YOUR experience, and for many of us staying is important when we know things can be fixed. Mirabel's and Bruno's decisions to stay are important, because they represent a kind of family love we rarely see in fiction: the love we share even when we're hurt and imperfect, and our desire not to leave everyone behind, but to work together to make things better, with all the nuance real life presents.

Encanto doesn't have the "you must forgive your family for everything just because it's your family" kind of toxic message we use to see in "family movies". Encanto's message is "even if we're broken, we can heal together if we love each other", and the movie works precisely because of this: they really love each other and care about each other, despite all their mistakes.

I'm sick of people projecting their issues in this movie to talk shit about the characters, or try to "fix" them inserting in them that kind of individualistic mindset they DON'T HAVE canonically or making them extremely miserable to the point the movie loses its sense, just because they can't wrap their heads around this revolutionary concept of "family members that really love each other". Erasing this very essential aspect of the characters is also part of that tendency to erase the movie's Colombian spirit, since family is a very important thing for Hispanic people, is a SUPER IMPORTANT thing for Colombian people, and they have been saying it for months. The Madrigal family was built in a very specific way to make things "fixable". Take that away, and you shit on the very point of the whole movie.

Being part of this fandom since November is a quite disturbing thing, like being trapped in a time loop, because every day you wake up to the same bad takes, the same bashing, the same hate, and you wonder "holy shit, aren't we over this yet?". No, it seems we're not. There's always room for another post like GUYS GUYS ALMA IS A FUCKING ABUSER BITCH HELL I HATE HER WHY DIDN'T THEY DROWN HER IN THE RIVER AND LEAVE FOREVER?? I WOULD'VE LEFT IN A BLINK THEY'RE TOXIC!!

No one cares about what would've you done, José Antonio. What frigging movie did you watch?

Some days ago, I watched Nicque Marina's vid ranting about the hate Alma receives and, though I'm talking in a more general way, she made an important point: Encanto is not your space to play out your therapy fantasies. You don't agree with the positive message of the movie about healing and reconciliation? You don't agree with the obvious fact that neither Alma was SO HORRIBLE nor Bruno/Mirabel/the whole family was SO MISERABLE? Perfect, but at least ask yourself if there's something good you can learn from it, instead of twisting it to fit your idea of what should have been.

[sparkbeast20]

An Angel doesn’t belong here!

Warning: Swearing, dark stuff and angst

Lucifer

Lucifer was walking back to his room, to finally have some alone time with his beloved after a long day of filling up paper work and dealing with his brothers’ shenanigans.

Once opening the door, he stops dead on his track when he saw you packing a luggage with your things and a familiar face helping you.

“What’s the meaning of this Michael!”

Michael stops and look at Lucifer with a sad and unpleased look on his face, he walks closer to Lucifer with one hand in his pocket and the other using to gesture, and he begins to speak.

“Lucifer, Father ordered me to escort Y/n back home”

“Y/n home is here, with my brothers and I, they decided to stay here after becoming my mate” he said it stern tone as he slowly crushes the door knob that he still holding.

Michael let out a sigh and look Lucifer directly in the eye and say with a serious tone.

“I didn’t mean the Human world”

Lucifer let go the door knob, his eyes widen and turn to look at you and notice that you’re dress in white but with an emotionless face and eyes hazy.

He tries to approach you, when Michael step right in front of him with arms cross on his chest.

“I need to talk to them” but Michael just shake head.

“I sorry Lucifer, but you can’t near them”

“Why not!”

“Because their an Angel, I can’t let you corrupt them and ruining their chance of ascend above” he sighs and pinch the bridge of his nose.

“Look it was a mistake letting them stay here this long, Y/n is too pure to be here in hell.” Michael continues to talk, and walks over to you, all the while Lucifer standing near the door frame stunned.

“So, Father solution is to take them somewhere safe and as far away from demonic influences, you do understand do you Lucifer, An Angel doesn’t belong here”

In a moment, you tug on Michael sleeve “Done?” you just nod as if you were a puppet, seeing how you move and respond broke Lucifer, in his mind was thinking what did Michael did to you,

The two of you start walking out of Lucifer’s room.

“Oh!” Michael stops and places on hand on a stunned Lucifer, then says “don’t worry, I’ll take good care of them”

Mammon

Proud on his winning, Mammon walks down an empty and quiet hall towards his room, ready to show off all the grimms he won, once he got to the door, barge in with the sack of grimms held up high.

“Oi, Babe look what I got we’re going out to night so get dress” eyes close and voice loud.

“Mammon, are you always this impulsive and loud”

His arms drop on his side, eyes open from the top of the stairs of his room, he saw you all in white staring at the mirror, then he looks around to see Azrael sitting in his couch, looking through his magazine with stern look on his face.

“Azrael, W-what are you d-doing here” Mammon hardly can talk, knowing what Azrael’s role is, send shiver down his spine.

Azrael let out sigh, close the magazine, then stood up and start walking over to you.

“Look, I won’t be here long, I’m just following orders” he said it nonchalantly.

“Orders! What damn orders?” Mammon leap over the railing and rush over to Azrael, grab his shoulder the ladder, is visibly irritated of Mammon’s rude. He shrugs off Mammon hand and try to compose himself.

“I’m escorting y/n back to the Celestial Realm where they belong”

The moment of silent was broke by the bag of grimms drop on the floor, shock Mammon look over Azrael’s shoulder to see you, your emotionless face and lifeless eyes broke his heart.

He pushes Azrael out of the way and rush over to you, but stop when Azrael grab the scarf of his jacket and throw him, causing Mammon to fall on his tail bone.

Mammon was about to retaliate, when Azrael towering over him, with a darken face, he begins to speak.

“Mammon, I had enough of your rudeness, this is the reason why y/n has to go with me, from keeping their soul tainted by you and brothers demonic plague, their too good to be here” he took a deep breath and compose himself and continues “An Angel doesn’t belong here”

Azrael turn his back on Mammon, grab your bags and your hand, and start walking out the room with you.

Mammon watch you walk out with the angel; broken tears start falling from his eyes.

Once Azrael got you out of the room, he stops not even looking at Mammon and speaks

“Don’t worry Mammon, I’ll protect them”

Leviathan

Levi rush down the dark and quiet hall way with a new game in hand, exited to show you.

He got to the door of his room, he was about to turn the door knob, when a familiar laughter was coming from inside the room, he stiff then opens the door, both eyes and mouth was widened open, when he saw you in white and Uriel sitting on his tub with one of his figurines in his hand, examining the thing.

“U-Uriel why are y-you in my r-room” Levi studder, then Uriel turn look at Levi, he smiles and throw the figurine away and hop off the tub, walk closer to Levi and start talking.

“Leviathan, long time no see how’s it been, me I doing great, after you and your brothers fall, the Celestial Realm is now perfect as it should be.” the spiteful complement sting Levi, causing him to clinch his game in his hand.

Piss off at Uriel pompons attitude, Levi took in a deep breather and stand up for himself.

“If your just here insult me and my brothers, I suggest that you FUCK OFF and never talk to me”

Uriel pouts and huffs and turn his back at Levi. “Fine!” and he start walking closer to a bag and pick it up.

“Y/n lets go, this no place for Angels”

“What?” all his confined just when down the drain out of his body.

“Well, it seems that angels aren’t welcome in your room so, I guess that we should be leaving”

“they’re not an Angel, they’re human” Levi clarifies Uriel, but he just dramatically gasps with one hand over his mouth.

“How dare you call lovely y/n a human, and not an Angel, honestly I should have taken them with me back to Celestial Realm sooner, so they can have a perfect life and not be influences by you and imperfect life style.”

Levi’s face is pale as a ghost, hearing what Uriel is implying, he dots his eyes to you to see if respond to all of this, but all he saw was lifeless expression, he was terrified to see you like this.

“Please…...please don’t take them away” Levi is on his knees begging Uriel to not take you from him, but Uriel click his tongue, disgusted at Levi’s action.

“Oh, get up Leviathan, have some self-respect for yourself, begging won’t stop anything, and for once think about their wellbeing, this isn’t place for them. An Angel doesn’t belong here”

Uriel grab your hand and start walking, while Levi looks up to you with tears falling from his eyes.

“Oh, Levi!” he looks at Uriel, who has a menacing smirk on is face “Don’t worry, I’ll give them a Perfect Life”

Satan

A book in hand Satan heads towards his room, for a good reading before bed.

“Be careful, we don’t want to make a mess in here” Satan drop his book, to see that the door is open and an Angel helping you pack.

“WHO THE HELL ARE YOU! AND WHY ARE TOUCH MY MATE!” the angel quickly turns around to see Satan, he got up and stood in front of Satan, blocking you from his direction.

“Satan, am Zadkiel I came here to escort y/n back to the Celestial Realm, as order of my Father” he said it with a stern tone in his voice.

Satan march over to Zadkiel and grab the angel by the collar of his uniform and raise him up.

“you’re not taking them anywhere; you don’t decide for them and I don’t care what you father tell you, their staying here with me and my brothers” Satan growls at the Angel, but Zadkiel is not phase by the threat.

“Thank you, Satan for showing me what my father and my brothers are warning me about and the reason that y/n really need to come with me” Satan’s eyes widen and drop Zadkiel then took a step back.

“What do you mean by that?” Satan asks and turns to you, his heart shuttered when he saw your lifeless eyes.

“If they stay here, they won’t be able to ascend” Zadkiel walks over to you and fixes your hair and continue “If you care for their well-being, you need to let them go, Satan” he looks over to Satan with a genuine look of concern.

Satan knows that some part of his statement was true, but he wants to know one thing.

“But, why the Celestial Realm, should they be escorted to the human world?”

But Zadkiel shook his head and answer Satan’s question.

“My father sees them as an Angel, heist fort they belong with us in Celestial Realm, not at the human world or here, an angel doesn’t belong here in Devildom”

Zadkiel grab your hand and lead you out of the room, while Satan watch unable to move.

“I do apologies Satan” Zadkiel look back at Satan “but don’t worry about them, they’re in good hands”

Asmodeus

Cheerful Asmo, skip down the dark and quiet halls, with two bags in each hand making his way to his room, exited to show you all the cute things he bought.

He walks in with his eyes close and heads toward the nearest drawer, and start greeting you.

“Oh Darling, I can wait for you to see the dress I bought”

“Asmodeus, you’re still the same pompous and narcissist, well it’s a good thing you became a Demon”

The bags drop on the floor, Asmo was shaking as he turns around, to see the where the familiar voice came.

“R-Raphael” Asmo clinch his jacket in fear and shock, his heart shuttered in a million of pieces to what his saw.

You awake but lifeless, sitting on Raphael while he was cuddling you with one arm.

“RAPHAEL! WHAT HAVE YOU DO TO THEM” Asmo rush over, when Raphael raises his hand, then brought it near his lips making a quiet gesture to Asmo.

“Their tired, so I let them rest in my arms” he said it while fix your hair, and Asmo watches.

“Raphael please let them go” Asmo voices crack bagging for Raphael to let you go, but he just ignores as see looks at you with deep concern and happiness.

“Look at them, so precious and innocent like an Angel” Raphael kisses the top of your head, then turn to Asmo, with a darken face “An Angel doesn’t belong here, right Asmo”

“No! They do belong here; I’ll make sure that their soul~”

“Enough!”

Asmo covered his mouth, in fear he drops down on his knee’s tears building up.

Raphael regains his Compose sure, and looks at you with an apologist look on his face.

“I sorry for yelling, you final get to see him so now, we really should be leave, Love” once you nod lightly, Raphael stood up with you in his arm and your bag on one of his shoulders, and start walking out of the room.

Asmo, just look on in horror seeing you being carried away by Raphael.

“Asmodeus!” Raphael turns his head and says “Don’t worry, I’ll give all the love they need”

Beelzebub

Beel walks down the empty hallway with snack in his arms heading to his and Belphie’s room, for some alone time with you.

Once the door open, he saw you standing in the middle of the room, dress all in white and holding a luggage.

“y/n?” concern beel walks over to you, when he saw your eyes, he drops everything stop dead at his track.

“Beelzebub, look what you did, you made a mess” Beel look up at the swirl stair case to see Ramiel leaning on railing with a smile on his face.

“Ramiel, what are you doing?” Beel asks in a confuse tone, while Ramiel went down the stair and start talking.

“I was just supposed to bring y/n back to Celestial Realm but, I miss my favorite twins, I couldn’t find Belphegor anywhere, so I waited for you”

“What do mean bring y/n back to Celestial Realm?”

“Oops, my bad I didn’t send you a message, well since I’m here. Father send me personal to bring y/n back to Celestial Realm to? How those he puts it. “Save their soul from damned nation” something along that line” he said nonchalantly, Beel’s eyes widen, and rush over to you hugging, but Ramiel grab your arms and pull you in a protective hug before Beel manage to grab you.

“No-no, Beelzebub, no touchy the angel, my job is keeping them from touching you and your brothers”

“LET THEM GO!” Beel threating Ramiel, but the angel reaches down to grab your bag and stood right in front of you.

“Beelzebub, I understand that your angry, but think this clearly you love them, right?” Beel nod in response “So, you’ll do what ever it takes to keep them safe even it hurts you, yes?”

“Yes!”

“Then let them ascend, if they stay here, they’ll suffer the same way you and your brothers”

Beel froze in place after hear that, Ramiel grab your hands and slowly walk around Beel, while he just watches you go.

“I so sorry, Beelzebub, truly I am. But make sure they a wonderful life” the two walks out leaving Beel with one final word “An angel doesn’t belong here”

Belphegor

Belphie feeling strange, got up from bed turn to look at you, but you weren’t in bed he looked around to see you all in white with a bag in your hands, when he calls to you someone came out behind you.

It was Sariel, with a smug look on his face.

“Sariel, what the hell are you doing, and what with the look on your face?”

But all Sariel can do is chuckle, he wraps his arms around your shoulder, place one hand on you lower jaw and use it to talk to Belphie.

“Oh! Sorry my beloved, his here to take me away from you and your crazy family” he said it in a high pitch voice, and you look dead inside.

Belphie beyond piss at Sariel, using you like a puppet, and turn to his demon form and march towards the two of you, but Sariel grab both of your wrist and use your arms to shield the two of you.

“FUCKING, LET THEM GO SARIEL THIS IT’S FUNNY AT ALL” threating Sariel, but the angel keeps using you as a puppet.

“Beloved, you’re scaring him, his just doing his job, aren’t you happy for me. He told me that am angel and his taking me to meet your Father”

“What?” Belphie took a step back, shaking he clinch his fist, and trying to hold back the tears.

“Yep, I’m going to stay with the other angels. Sariel said that if I stay here any longer, I might get kill again or worst suffer the same way as you, an angel doesn’t belong here, Belphegor”

“Sariel stop it, they’re not your puppet, please!” Belphie is grabbing his chest in pain seeing you like this.

Sariel let go of your jaw, he leans forward over your shoulder, his entire demeanor change, he start talking in his real voice deep and unnerving “Belphegor, take one final look at them, and say your good bye, because I’m going to make sure they’ll never get kill again”

A whimper stirs him awake

[porgthespacepenguin]

Thoughts about episode 2.8 (2/3)

Turns out there's way too much to talk about for only two posts, so there'll be a third one later this weekend to cover -- let's face it -- all the non-Q related things. Including, err, the plot. I have PRIORITIES, people, and they're named Q and Picard.

(Spoilers under the cut, as always.)

Note: the first version of this post got eaten by Tumblr, because I'm an idiot who forgot to save her drafts. Don't be like me or Picard, folks. Save what you love, before it's too late.

Soong vs. Q

Now we get to the reason I need a third post at all: there's just so much mirroring, so many parallels between Soong and Q to deserve at least an entire post.

In episode 2.5, the show ostensibly paralleled the two of them as powerful and desperate men willing to do anything to save the ones they love.

Spoiler alert: Q and Soong in fact absolute opposites of each other.

No god of mine

Long ago, I theorized that Soong and Q were meant to highlight the difference between a god complex and an actual omnipotent being.

You can read the post if you like, it still partly holds up, but the jist of it is: Soong's power over his daughters is a grim parody of Q's powers.

Initially, we were led to think that Soong had lost a daughter, and been trying, however darkly, to fix his mistake through multiple iterations of a replacement he could finally save.

But no: there was no original daughter -- just an original sin. Like any would-be god, Soong wants to create life.

No matter the cost.

In fact, he's been trying and failing for years: before Kore, all the other "daughters of Zeus" died before their fourth birthday, sometimes much earlier. Until Kore, who against all odds managed to survive.

Soong even tells Kore outright:

"You exist because I willed it."

Will made manifest: in other words, God.

But Soong, despite his scientific genius and his delusions, is no god. His attempts at creating life are doomed to fail. He is an inverted reflection of Q, who not only has the power to create and destroy, but the wisdom to know how to use it.

It's not a coincidence that Q is the one to cure Kore: only Q can complete what Soong has started, taking the clay of Soong's imperfect work and burning it clean of weakness, firing Soong's flawed creation into living perfection.

Soong is a human pretending to be a god; Q is the real deal.

Through a mirror darkly, indeed.

Tales of a mother

The mirroring continues with the theme of truth.

Unlike Q, who's been unfailingly honest with Picard, Soong's relationship to the truth is flawed, to say the least:

"Reality is a construct of simple-minded fools who can't function in the absence of boundaries!"

In fact, we learn that Soong has been feeding Kore stories about a fake mother:

Yet more mirroring: Q, however, has been trying to get Picard to tell his own story, the real story, to confront what happened to his mother.

Unsurprisingly, Soong doesn't even understand why it matters that he's been lying to Kore, since:

"It made you happy!"

And perhaps it did, for a time, but that's not the issue.

Soong's lies to Kore, and Picard's lies to himself, are both comforting fantasies meant to keep them trapped in their respective basements, unable and unwilling to free themselves:

Soong has been lying to Kore to serve his own selfish purposes: to keep her complicit in her own imprisonment.

Q, on the other hand, wants Picard to stop lying to himself, stop hiding from himself, and finally accept the real Jean-Luc, imperfect yet worthy of love.

Love and sacrifice

In 2.6, Soong calls Kore his "life's work", and in 2.8 it's clear that he doesn't see himself as her father so much as her owner:

"You don't get to walk away from me. You don't exist without me."

If I had more time, there would be beautiful parenthood parallels to draw about Raffi and Elnor, or Picard's relationship to Agnes and Rios:

(Perhaps in the next post. Or two, at this rate.)

Regardless, while Picard may struggle with being a father figure, Soong certainly doesn't. Father, creator, tormentor -- it's all the same to him.

He has no problem justifying everything he's done, all the suffering and death he's wrought upon his dozen of innocent "daughters". He doesn't feel an ounce of guilt. Worse, he expect gratitude in return:

"I did everything, sacrified everything for you."

But he didn't. Everything he's done, he's done for himself and his legacy. Kore doesn't owe him anything. She didn't ask to be created, to be born, not even to survive where her sisters didn't.

As she turns away, Kore tells him, smiling sadly,

"Maybe it's you who doesn't exist without me."

She's right. Soong has built his life around his work, refusing to see the suffering it was causing, all in the name of his legacy.

He loves Kore, but only as a reflection of himself, and the selfishness of his love is what ultimately causes him to lose her.

The contrast with Q is astonishing.

Picard's very existence brings meaning to Q's life, and so Q is risking everything to save him, no matter the cost to himself.

Q is literally ceasing to exist, fading into nothing, out of love.

His love for Picard, selfless and true, is the driving force behind all of his actions. And that's why Q will succeed where Soong failed.

The way they love mirrors their duality: Soong's love, twisted and possessive, seeks to control and imprison; Q's love, redemptive and transcendent, seeks to save and set free.

If you love someone, let them go

Not only has Soong has been lying to Kore her whole life, but his hubris has made her a prisoner of her own sick body, unable to go outside or socialize with others.

Worse, Kore suspects that even if Soong ever found a way to cure her, he would never let her go:

"No matter what, I was never going to leave this house, was I?"

Q, on the other hand, gives Kore the means to free herself:

(Love that smug little label, by the way. What a legend.)

Importantly, by giving her the cure, Q also gives Kore a choice:

She stands in front of a white door, but the door is open, because the trap is immaterial. All she has to do is step through it.

And she does, facing her fear, choosing to trust Q and ultimately freeing herself from Soong. Take note, Picard.

Q is the key

Soong has been keeping Kore locked up all her life, dependent on him for her survival, until Q gives her the metaphorical key to her freedom.

Remember the intro? Q is symbolized by a keyhole:

While Q's been trying to give Picard the key to his freedom, only Picard can decide to use it, open the door and choose to live -- like Kore.

Q-card mirrors

Yes, I know. Strictly speaking, I was supposed to leave Q-card aside for this post, but I can't resist and you'll soon see why. The parallels between 2.6 and 2.8 are absolutely unhinged.

We've long established that Q is the sun, and a dying sun at that. In a recent meta, I noted that this line in 2.6 implicitely describes Q:

“Sometimes those who shine the brightest (...)"

Well, what do you know, in 2.8 the show makes the comparison explicit, in case we hadn't yet connected the dots:

"Dying stars burn brighter as they spin toward extinction (...)"

Through Guinan, we learn that the rest of the quote also applies to Q:

Q is dying. He's hurt. He is suffering "in ways that others can never understand".

Remember how Picard told Rene that even in the darkness, there is always light?

The choice of words is not a coincidence.

Q is all alone in the darkness: now more than ever, Q desperately needs the light of Picard's love to save him.

Both of them are each other's guiding lights. All they need is to trust each other -- like Kore trusted Q -- and they will find their way home.

Trop mignon!

Let's wrap up this post with a touch of sweetness:

Q and Picard, speaking French! How freaking adorable is that? 😍 And they're mirroring each other, naturally: Q speaks French at the start of the episode, and Picard at the end of it.

Leaving aside the cuteness, Picard rarely speaks French in canon, so the symbolism is pretty obvious: Jean-Luc and Q speak the same language, a language only they understand.

The plot, where's the plot?

Yes, I know! Two posts in, and I've not even written a word about the plot, or team Picard. But can you blame me? There's just so much Q and Picard goodness, I couldn't resist.

Part 3 will be coming sometime this weekend, with on the menu:

Rios/Teresa mirroring Q-card (it's insane, and it's killing me)

Queen Agnes prepares for war

Raffi/Picard mirroring

And maybe more

In the meantime, hope you enjoyed the post, and thank you for reading! ❤️

Read more:

[Back to part 1] [Forward to part 3]

[dreamersdreamloud]

Coming Home To You (Part 2)

AN: Kara is not Supergirl. She’s human and a reporter :) 

Many of you have requested a part two so here you go! This is part of a book that I’m working on so enjoy this sneak peek 

“This was a mistake.” Lena paces around inside her penthouse. 

Kara stands awkwardly in the middle of Lena’s living room. She watches her lover in distress, her mind running into a million thoughts. What would Alex say when she finds out? What would Eliza think of her when she finds out? 

She betrayed her oldest sister. It looks bad but most importantly she feels terrible. Kara let her temptations get the best of her. She shouldn’t have gotten so close to Lena when (Y/N) was away. She shouldn’t have comforted her most of the time when they heard the news that (Y/N) went missing during a mission. 

They shouldn’t have assumed that the person they care and love for was dead without any hard evidence. 

“Did you know?! Did you know that she was alive this whole time?!” Lena yells at the blonde Danvers. 

Kara was taken by surprise that Lena is yelling at her. She never yells at her. She never experienced her anger toward her. 

“What? No! Of course not!” Kara quickly replies. 

“How could you not know?! You literally write about international news, war stories, political topics, Kara!” 

“I’m just a reporter, Lena! I’m not a damn government spy! When I heard about my sister going missing. . . I tried to find leads, Lena! I TRIED! Nothing came out. No trace. No witnesses. No clues of what happened to my sister and her team!” 

Lena shakes her head in silence. Her tears were starting to form again. The young CEO thinks about the decisions she has made that have come to this very moment. She shouldn’t have accepted the youngest Danvers’ help and comfort when (Y/N) wasn’t around. She was a fool for falling for Kara’s touch and caring words. 

She tragically replaced (Y/N)’s kisses with Kara’s. 

“I need to find her. . . I need to find (Y/N).” Lena frantically says. “I just need to explain to her that this was a mistake. None of this was serious.” 

Kara looks into the floor and shakes her head in disapproval. 

“Lena . . .” 

“I’m sure she’ll understand. She has always been reasonable, right? God where could she be. A local bar! I just need to look up the local bars. She can’t be far. I-” 

“LENA!” Kara interrupted. 

The raven haired stops rambling and looks at Kara with frustration. 

“WHAT KARA?! I need to find your sister! I need to fix my relationship with her!” 

“What about us?” Kara questions her actions, her reasoning. 

Lena huffs out a laugh, “Us? There’s no us, Kara! This was a mistake. I MADE A MISTAKE. I love your sister, Kara. You know that!” 

It pains Kara to hear those words coming out of Lena’s mouth. Kara fell in love with Lena. In all truth, she fell in love with her while you were dating Lena. She kept it to herself. The youngest Danvers didn’t want to ruin the relationship you have with Lena. She thought that you being “dead” was an opportunity for her to have a chance being with the young CEO. 

Lena sobs, her knees falling to the ground. The stress and frustrations are getting to her. Kara didn’t hesitate to be by her side, comforting her the best she could without making the situation worse. Lena cries against Kara’s shoulder. 

“It’s not ideal to go out and find my sister, Lena. We should probably wait until tomorrow. Let her cool off. I’ll find her first thing in the morning and make this right.” 

“Okay.” Lena mumbles. 

**** 

It’s been three whole days that you haven’t stepped out of your hotel room. You have cried endlessly. Scream multiple times. You even broke a couple of items in the room. You drank until you blackout and woke up repeating the same thing you did yesterday. 

You have decided that you need to put your hurt feelings aside. You need to reunite with your family and friends. You mentally think about how you’re going to pretend that you didn’t see Kara and Lena a few days ago. You will keep your distance. You will maintain your cover. 

Your captain has already arranged your new deployment. You will be leaving at the end of the month and have a new assignment to take over. Your plan is to just get away from here. 

You've been in the bathroom for a while. Looking at yourself in the mirror. It’s obvious that it looks like you have gotten no sleep. You can just pass it off and just say that your military position doesn't give you enough sleep

You fix the imperfections of your new set of uniform before heading out. You take a deep breath and hope that no one catches you acting differently. 

*** 

Location: Lena’s Office 

“I can’t find her, Lena.” Kara desperately says. 

Lena looks out to the window, standing straight as possible. She was keeping her distance from the youngest Danvers. She can’t trust herself being near the reporter. 

“HOPE can’t find her too. The face recognition hasn’t picked up her face anywhere. . .” 

Kara’s phone rings out loud. The reporter sighs because it’s her sister, Alex. She hasn’t talked to her since you confronted your youngest sister. Kara hopes that Alex hasn’t found out, she can’t bear to handle Alex’s lecture and disappointment. 

Kara answers the call and puts it on speaker for Lena to hear as well. 

Kara: “Hello?” 

Alex: “Kara! Where are you?!” She said cheerfully. 

Kara: “I’m following a lead for my article. Why what’s up?” 

Alex: “(Y/N) is back! She’s alive, Kara! She’s alive!” 

Kara fumbles her words, not knowing how to react or say. She didn’t want to ruin her sister’s excitement. 

Alex: “Get over here at the DEO. J’onn have already picked up Eliza. They’re on their way back here. Bring Lena!” 

The call ended without Kara saying another word. Alex was too happy and excited to see you again. She’s happy that she gets to see you “first.” 

*** 

*A few hours earlier*

You didn’t head straight to the DEO to surprise your sister, Alex. You made a quick stop despite the situation you were in. The Uber car pulls up to the two story house that you were looking for. There’s physical changes to the house last time you came here. The grass was looking more green and the roses were more full. By looking at the driveway, the two people you wanted to see are still home. 

You rang the doorbell once and you can tell that someone is on their way to answer the door. You mentally ready yourself before they open the door. 

A woman gasped as they answered the door and saw you standing firmly in the middle. 

“(Y/N)?” Eve can’t believe her eyes. 

“Eve, who’s at the door?” Lex calls out in the background. 

Eve was speechless that she couldn’t answer her husband. Lex was a tad worried that Eve wasn’t answering him right away. The man makes her way to the door and gives the same shocking reaction as his wife. 

“(Y/N)! You bastard! You’re alive!” He shouts with joy. 

You smiled at both of them. You step in to give Eve a hug and then give Lex the same affection. Immediately, Lex can tell that there’s something wrong. He just knows. The man has always been like a brother to you and he feels the same way too. 

The married couple lead you to the living room to have a more comfortable environment to catch up. They didn’t have to worry about being late to their work since they’re technically the bosses of their own department at L-Corp. Eve comes in with some tea and mini sandwiches for everyone. The three made small talk, giving them the truth about what really happened in the months you were missing. 

Lex and Eve felt sorry for you how much pain and recovery you have to go through alone after that accident happened. You assure them that it wasn’t a big deal and that you’re very happy to live another day. 

After the good catch up, Lex thought it was time to find out what was bothering you. 

“(Y/N). . Why exactly are you here? Aren’t you supposed to see your sisters first? Or perhaps Lena?” 

You looked to the side, took a deep breath and sighed loudly. Your mind goes back to Lena. 

“Did you know?” You vaguely ask your ex-girlfriend’s brother. 

“Know what?” Lex replies, Eve looks equally confused. This confirms that no one knows, especially your mother and Alex. 

“About Kara and Lena. . .” Lex thinks for a moment before he replies. 

“All I know is that they’re close. When you were away, Kara had been keeping Lena company.” 

You nodded. He’s telling the truth. Small anger was inside you but you’re mad at Lex. You start to get mad at yourself for not being around much. 

“I caught them. . . I found your sister with my sister. It was clear that the love bites and the flushed redden cheeks on Lena were from Kara. . .” 

Lex suddenly feels stupid for not seeing this. He thinks about how he didn’t see the little hints that his sister was having a lover, becoming a cheater. Eve looks at you with sad eyes, she gets up and wraps you in a hug. 

“(Y/N) I don’t know what to say . . . I just - I really didn’t know. If only I have seen it sooner I would have prevented Lena from making those-” 

“Lex no.” You interrupted him. “Your sister is her own person. She can decide what she wants to do. You couldn’t have prevented her feelings for someone else. I’m not mad at you Lex. You’re always like a brother to me. You have helped me so much and I will continue to do the same. Despite the situation. This is between Lena and I.” 

Lex sucks in his lips and nods, “Did the two of you officially break up or talk about it?” 

“No. I left right when I found out. My heart is really fragile at the moment but I promise you like I promised to Lillian years ago that I will not harm Lena in any way. I have never physically abused her and I will not let this dictate my actions.” 

“You’re a good person, (Y/N). I’m sorry that it had to come out like this. I was desperately waiting for the two of you to get married someday. Getting the chance to call you my sister-in-law.”

You sadly laugh. You almost forgot about the ring that was attached to your military dog tags. You reveal your necklace to Lex and Eve. Eve was the first to react fast. 

“(Y/N)! That ring looks so beautiful!” Eve focused on the diamond on the ring. It wasn’t too small nor too big. It was the perfect size. 

“Damnit Lena.” Lex says under his breath while his wife talks to (Y/N) about the ring. “You better realize that you threw out the best Danvers sister. This one was going to marry you.” 

[liquidstar]

done with another set of ocs ^_^ these two took a bit longer because i had other projects in-between, but im so glad to finally have them ready! i included a close-up of their faces too because they’re hard to see so zoomed out and i wanted people to see their eyes! anyway as usual more info about them as individuals under the cut! 

First up is Baiduri, named after an exoplanet with a beautiful iridescent surface, which is why it’s own namesake literally means “Opal.” Something that’s very much reflected in her design! She has crystals scattered about all over her outfit, and especially her weapon, a double-sided hammer. Of course, it all stems from her power, Crystalis, which allows her to encase things in a beautiful crystal coating. She’s a lady of elegance and grace, after all, aesthetic perfection and beauty are what she strives for! Naturally they come easy to her, but it can be a bit frustrating to others when she insists on everything being just-so. Like an interior designer critiquing your living room, she can be quite particular and even a little pompous at times. Don’t mistake this for shallowness though, especially when it comes to judging other people, and especially especially when it comes to her very imperfect guildmates, who she still cherishes.

And to contrast her is Nix, named for a moon of Pluto whose own namesake came from a Goddess of the night. So, as you’d expect, they themselves are a total night owl, they literally do not come out during the day and you can see it in their very pale skin. Their power, Midnight, is an ability that gives them incredible strength in moonlight, but it often leaves them with a terrible fatigue by the time the moon sets. Of course, they could avoid this fallout if they used their ability more moderately, but the rush of exhilaration that comes with the power is just too tempting to them, like many other things. They lack self-control, plain and simple, and it’s not just impulsivity but the fact that they have a very addictive personality, anything for that dopamine rush, really. Luckily they also have their guildmates around to help when needed too, but how much they’re willing to accept is a different story all together.

Though despite they’re obvious differences and respective dysfunctionalities on the offset, these two have actually been partners for a while- I mean that both in the sense of teaming up for guild missions and actually being in a relationship. They’re a bit of an odd pair, very “highschool cheerleader dating the weird kid for some reason” so it may get Baiduri some questions about her taste, but it’s nothing at all like an “i can fix them” situation. She doesn’t see Nix as a project, nor do they expect Baiduri to fix them. In fact, it’s the opposite- They both become better because they individually want to work on themselves for the sake of their partner. Baiduri is actually seeing perfection can exist within something imperfect too, and that sometimes things that seem odd or quirky can be a lot of fun. Meanwhile Nix more or less spent their entire life not really caring much about anything aside from having fun, but to them Baiduri is someone they truly want to care for, their relationship is something to put effort into to strive for something better. They’re both not perfect, but they somehow help each other. However they still very much have to learn to extend these behaviors towards other people too, but it takes baby steps.

[butdidmarlenacomebackhome]

✨hcs for the courtiers reacting to their s/o wearing their trademark outfits✨

i think i did a pretty decent job at keeping this gender-neutral, let me know if there is any mistake/room for improvement. i'd love to hear your feedback 👉🏻👈🏻

🍷consul valerius

• blushes hard

• "what a presumptious lack of decorum" said while still blushing, therfore only half-hearted

• desperately tries to hide how much he likes it but his eyes permanently glued on you kind of betray him

• the only thing he loves more than himself & his status is you, so imagine how utterly smug would he be about seeing you in his attire (not that he'd ever openly show it!!! it wouldn't be proper of him 👀👀👀)

• if you follow him around/he catches sight of you while going about his day, any hope to get things done is thrown out the window

• he's definitely not staring at you during the courtiers' meeting, his eyes just happened to focus on the general area where you're standing/sitting

• at the end of the day will literally leave you a note on your bed saying you can keep the clothes, you're welcome ("my wardrobe can afford to lose a spare, while yours could definitely use something fashionable for a change")

• spoiler it's just a roundabout way to say he wants to see you wearing his clothes again & more often 👀

• from that day on, will go out of his way to gift you jewelry, clothes, accessories matching to his own and fully expects you to always wear them

🍖procurator volta

• blushes like crazy & her eyes literally fill with stars & sparkles,, almost cries bc of what she perceives to be a clear display of affection

• "mc!!! you look!!! absolutely!!! gorgeous!!!" in modern!au would definitely tell you you look like a snackkk but to be fair she thinks you're gorgeous on any normal day

• follows you around the whole day & shily holds your hand, she loves the idea of the two of you making your way through the palace in matching outfits

• normally she'd be pretty quaint but with you by her side reassuring her of your love so openly,,, she's just over the moon my friends 🚀🚀🚀

• thinks her clothes suit you better than they'd ever do on her, but on a side note she also probably thinks anything would look good on you (the precious baby ಥ_ಥ)

• she's also pretty honored to have you dress like her, it's like a public love declaration & it makes her all fuzzy to know you're not embarrassed of her

• she'll literally convince you to stop for snacks every 15 minutes tho & no matter what you're doing or what business you're attending to, you just can't resist her puss in boots eyes & decide to join her every single time

• at the end of the day, she hugs you (I hc her loving pda but rarely initiating it bc she's too shy, so it's a bit of a shock to suddenly receive a hug from her in the middle of the castle hallway) & thanks you for the wonderful day. snuggle with her in bed. do it.

tw. for slight nsfw-ish in next one but it's literally just an allusion that's barely even there + like 1 swear word

🐞pontifex vulgora

• does a double take, like they probably were just storming the hallways going off on a tangent about how tHERE'S NOT BEEN A SINGLE FIGHT IN DECADES AND THEY'RE SO WILLING TO START ONE WITH THE FIRST ONE THEIR EYES LAND ON- and then their eyes land on you and they have to check again to see if they'd actually seen what they think they've seen

• and holy shit do you look hot

• the gauntlets on you? the armor attire? yes ma'am please and thank you

• 100% will tease you at first

• "WHAT IS THIS? HAVE YOU FINALLY FALLEN OFF THE COUNTESS' GRACES NOT TO BE ABLE TO AFFORD YOUR OWN CLOTHES ANYMORE, MAGICIAN?"

• when you scoff & tell them you'd go get changed, they phisically S T O P you

• "I DIDN'T SAY YOU COULD GO, MAGICIAN. ARE YOU BACKING OUT OF YOUR OWN DECISION? IF YOU'RE NOT A COWARD YOU HAVE TO STICK TO IT, PET"

• proceeds to drag you wherever they go to show you off & always finds a way to keep their hands on you (they prolly also start carrying you on their shoulder at some point)

• will probably try to convince you to fight because you "have to look the part", your call if you want to humor the smol anger issues gremlin or not

• at the end of the day, they'd unabashedly ask you to keep the gauntlets on for later 👀

💉quaestor valdemar

• “oh what do we have here?”

• dr uwu is already more or less accustomed to seeing you in medical gear given the amount time you spend together in the dungeons (loveliest place for play dates mind you) but seeing you in their clothes is indeed something new

• a little confused at first but they got the spirit

• might tilt their head when they see you at first, then circle around you with that little cute smug smirk on their face to inspect you throughly and take you in from all angles [ I'm looking: respectfully 😌 ] just like a cat

• MOST IMPORTANTLY!! you know how they got those two cute bandaged silly cones on their head right??? there's no way you could get those to stand upright so you just kinda bandaged your head & gave up on trying to replicate the exact look but,, dr uwu notices & they're like ay no capt'n this ain't gonna fly here

• “now, now little magician we simply can't have that. a job half done is only half the fun after all” and they actually!!! make you sit down!!! reach out behind you!!! and start working on the bandages!!! braiding your hair!!! tucking them in!!! giving you their trademark cape!!!! yes i'm melting as i write this

• they too would appreciate having you around just to observe everyone's reactions to you both casually walking through the palace (shockingly) or in the dungeons while wearing matching clothes

• power couple tbh you'd have fun intimidating & unsettling every poor soul unlucky enough to encounter you on their path

• “are you having fun, my little magician? you seem to amuse yourself quite easily”

• at the end of the day if you ask nicely they may accept to lend them to you some other time you can tell they actually had quite a bit of fun too even if they don't say so out loud

🐛praetor vlastomil

• “s/o! what a lovely sight for sore eyes!”

• one word: e c s t a t i c

• def appreciates the gesture and gets quite vocal about it,, this worm baby will shower you with compliments and attention all day

• prepare yourself to be paraded around all day while vlastomil stops random servants just to say things along the lines of “look at my gorgeous s/o, aren't they just lovely?” cue love struck gaze towards you

• he ignores whatever response random servant #143 comes up with & quickly moves on

• you know what time is it??? time to visit your babies!!! the wormies would be so happy to see you!! I hope you're not squeamish he will prompt them to show you some love too

• probably urges you to keep your head high and be confident as you walk arm in arm to remind the peasants where they stand (beneath the soles of your shoes) together <3

• probably takes you for a carriage ride to show you off some more & stare flippantly at peasants

• will fix any slight imperfection every 2 seconds, like tilting your cape so that it doesn't hang too low nor too on the side & if he's close enough he'll give you a smooch or two too istg this man has no chill

• at the end of the day he whines sm because he doesn't want you to take off his clothes,, if you manage to convince him you actually have to get changed be prepared to be BOMBARDED with requests for you to do it again for the rest of your life