#there may not be a question in there! his companions may not know the true risks

[flowercrownsanddaggers]

YOU CALL HIM 'PRECIOUS'

Featuring: Diluc, Kaeya, Kazuha, Xiao, Albedo

You caresses his cheeks.

"You. You are precious. You deserve the world."

— — —

DILUC

He'd ask why you got in his face all of a sudden, clasping his face—

And then you spoke gently.

You think he's precious? Compared to what, you? No, you were the most precious thing ever! Not that he was able to say that. You see, you stood so close, and you held him so sweet, and your eyes—

He blushes. Probably clears his throat.

"Well... thank you. That was very kind of you to say."

KAEYA

"O-Oh...?"

Most may think that he'd just flirt back, laughing it off.

Most would be wrong.

Deep down, he's a shy guy. Yeah, he got game, but he's also a sweetheart who buries himself in dark secrets.

"Well, that certaibly makes my day," he smiled. To be important was... quite nice, he supposed. Then, his eyes glaze over. He seems to remember something. Something terrible.

"Say, it truly is an honor to have gained a new ally such as yourself, and all without a timely notice," he says, successfully diverting the conversation for less unpleasant thoughts.

XIAO

No one can know for sure what happened, as you were both alone, but you swore he blushed.

He'd deny the pink in his cheeks. Would tell you that he was simply surprised. Oh, if only you knew the turmoil it caused.

The main reason for being so socially isolated was for the protection of mortals, and yet here you are, breaking those walls. It wasn't easy, nor painless, to build something so sheltering to the soul. Depriving the bird from inside, starving it of sunlight as it sat in its golden cage, feathers falling—

No, he did not blush. He cannot afford to have you mixed up in his personal matters. You were too precious. So no, he didn't blush. Just... say his name if you ever need him again, okay...?

ALBEDO

...

Okay, but how are you measuring preciousness? When compared to others, what traits does it take to earn that attribute? Physical appearance may cause the phenomenon of 'cuteness' to be triggered, but he wouldn't say he has a cute face or body. Was it his hair? Soft things are quite nice to the touch.

You'd just sit there, listening to his questions and rambles. "Well, eyes do decieve, so appearance doesn't really matter, but yours—" and off you'd go, off on your own tangent.

You both would take turns listening. It's only in the middle of yet another hypothesis that he realized something.

You were precious, too.

KAZUHA

Ah, but the wind tells him a different story.

"It is you who is precious, love." Hey, he's just relaying its message. It's true, you see, because—

"...and your voice. Your voice is a form of music, one that only you have been able to play. Ah, and your eyes—"

"Kazuha, stop itttt!!!" You blush and smile, playfully hitting his shoulder. He lightheartedly gufaws at that.

He truly is grateful to have a companion like you by his side. Not even Beidou could imagine a life without you on the Crux.

(EDIT: I forgot I removed Ei and Wanderer; I left them in a McDonald's parking lot. You can find them there. ^_^)

[jaynahh]

# you confessed to kabukimono, scaramouche, and wanderer

(seperated)

# scaramouche

# kabukimono

"love?"

his doe eyes were blown wide at your confession, though it didn't take long for a smile to take over his expression.

"aw, you're so sweet. i wouldn't choose anyone else to be my companion!"

oblivious.

before you could explain yourself, he took your hand in his and lead you near a tree. he suddenly bent down and picked a flower. once he stood up, he held the flower with both hands, offering it to you.

"ah, i love you too..."

his mouth hung open, thinking of other words to say, but nothing came out. he clearly had no experience. after a moment, he spoke.

"i've heard that when two people love each other, they give each other flowers. oh, speaking of flowers, i've recently tried this one tea flavor made with this one flower–i should make it for you sometime."

um, he's quite innocent.

in conclusion, kabukimono does in fact love you too. he just doesn't have a full grasp of what love means yet.

(ooc, he is soft for u)

you did it. you finally admitted your feelings for him. not gonna lie, it was scary. in fact, you were borderline hyperventilating as you awaited his response, avoiding eye contact at all costs.

you two were next to each other. so close, yet so far. you couldn't see his expression from the way you stared at the ground in anticipation. the silence was eating you up inside, and you couldn't handle much longer.

"look at me."

his voice snapped you out of your thoughts, taking a moment to register his request.

"...just for a moment," he spoke.

though his voice was quieter than usual, it didn't help with your racing heartbeat and uneven breathing. you fidgeted with your hands, weighing your options, hesitating before lifting your gaze from the ground to his face. your body tenses subconsciously, preparing for his wrath and uncaring behavior.

his eyes widen upon seeing your expression. you were crying. why are you crying? he wants to ask, yet he stops himself. he notices you tense up. were you scared of him? he instead takes a different approach.

"keep looking, please."

he knew how you would always avoid eye contact. he hated it. it always irritated him how he'd never get to see your face, how you'd always hide when he wanted to see your expression the most.

"i'm not mad. i... i won't yell at you."

without much thought, his hand went up to your face–his heart broke at the sight of you flinching, regret filled his mind thinking of the times he'd been harsh towards you–his thumb brushing your tears away.

"i might," he stammered, "i might feel the same."

in conclusion, scaramouche never knew about his feelings towards you until he saw the tears on your face. he needs time to process his newfound feelings.

# wanderer

he wants to make sure that you know what you'd be getting yourself into. him, out of all people? are you out of your mind?

he pursed his lips, analyzing your expression and body language. inside, he really doesn't know how to respond. he doesn't really believe it.

"are you sure?" he asked.

"why wouldn't i be?" you respond.

his mind was racing with so many questions. "but, you know how i'm like." it's true, you two have hung out on multiple occasions. he had never put up a front with you–or with anyone, for that matter. you know his true self well. so, why?

deep, deep down, he may be a tad bit insecure. just a little. okay, he feels like he doesn't deserve love–he doesn't deserve you.

"do you really want to live with my annoying remarks for the rest of your life?" he crosses his arms and tilted his head, making him seem judgemental in a negative way–but he's worried. just a little worried about you.

he's not sure if he's able to trust someone to that extent, but with you... of course he loves you. he's just scared.

scared for one, that you'd get sick of him and hate his attitude, and two, you'd get taken away from him too.

he's warning you, but he's secretly hoping you'd ignore all his warnings. he needs a hug.

in conclusion, he always had an interest in you, though he hid it quite well. he never acted on those feelings in fear that you'd leave him.

[springtyme]

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick x afab!reader (18+ mdni!)

word count: 952 - smut under the cut!

Can’t stop thinking about how Kyle would be the perfect boyfriend when you’re on your period…

He will always have a hot water bottle ready for you, and on the rare occasion that he doesn’t, he’ll use his hands, gently pressing his big, warm palms against your abdomen as he tries to soothe your cramps. He’s so attentive, never leaving your side when you’re in pain. 

Whether it’s bringing you a cup of hot tea, a cosy blanket, or just holding your hand, he always knows exactly what you need. He’ll massage your back with gentle strokes, easing the tension and making you feel like the weight of the world is lifted off your shoulders.

He is a champ in the pad aisle, asking all the right questions about what you need. He won’t shy away from the “embarrassing” items and instead, he’ll confidently march through the aisle, picking up what you need, making sure you have everything you need to feel comfortable during your period. He genuinely finds men who are uncomfortable with the subject dumb and childish.

Back at home, he’ll surprise you with a thoughtful care package filled with all your favourite snacks, painkillers, and even a little assortment of pampering items like face masks and bath bombs. He knows that sometimes a little self-care goes a long way in soothing both physical and emotional discomfort.

He’ll give you all the cuddles you need, wrapping his arms around you and holding you close. He understands the power of physical touch to provide comfort and reassurance, and he never hesitates to give you all the affection you crave.

These little acts of thoughtfulness remind you just how lucky you are to have him by your side.

He’ll shower you with words of love and encouragement, reminding you that you’re strong and capable, even when your body feels anything but. In his arms, you feel safe, loved, and understood. He is not just a partner, but a true companion who goes above and beyond to make sure you feel loved and supported. With him, every period becomes just a little bit easier to bear.

And even when your period is over, he doesn’t forget about your needs. He continues to show love and care, always prioritising your well-being. He understands that menstruation can sometimes leave you feeling drained and emotionally exhausted, so he makes it a point to be patient and understanding during those post-period days.

//

And if period sex is something you’re into, then he is more than willing to accommodate your desires. He loves any way he can provide relief for you and alleviate your cramps. He sees it as a way to connect with you and provide comfort during a sensitive time. 

He approaches it with care and understanding, always checking in with you to make sure you’re comfortable and enjoying yourself. He is always attentive to your needs, but when you’re on your period he makes even more of an effort to make sure everything is perfect for you. He will make sure to take things slow and gentle (if that’s what you prefer). He’s understanding of any discomfort you may experience and never pushes you beyond your limits. 

He never rushes you or makes you feel guilty for not being in the mood, but when you are, he is more than eager to please you. He takes the time to set the mood, dimming the lights and playing soft, soothing music in the background. He wants you to feel relaxed and comfortable in every aspect.

“You’re doing so good for me, baby,” he will whisper softly in your ear as he kisses your neck, his hands gently exploring your body and finding all the right spots that bring you pleasure. 

He listens to your cues and always encourages you to communicate openly about what feels good and what doesn’t. His main focus is always your pleasure and satisfaction. As he moves inside you, he does so with care and tenderness, never forgetting that your body may need a more gentle touch during this time. He takes his time, savouring every moment, and constantly checks in with you to ensure that you are enjoying yourself. With each thrust, he showers you with praise and encouragement, reminding you of your beauty and strength. 

He knows that the release of endorphins during sex can actually help soothe cramps and elevate your mood, so he is determined to make this experience as pleasurable as possible for you. “You are so incredible, baby,” he will whisper in your ear, his voice filled with genuine love and admiration. 

Afterwards, he’ll hold you close, his arms wrapped tightly around you, as you bask in the afterglow. He strokes your skin lovingly, whispering sweet words of affection and gratitude. He wants you to feel loved and cared for, not just during your period, but always. 

He will be so thorough and gentle with aftercare, making sure you’re comfortable and well taken care of. He understands that your body may need some extra care and attention after sex, especially during your period. He’ll help you get dressed if you need it, and then snuggle up with you, providing a safe and comforting space for you to rest and recover. 

He never makes you feel ashamed or embarrassed about your period, but instead loves and embraces every part of you. He truly is your rock, your comfort, and your partner in every sense of the word. With him, every period becomes a time of deep connection and intimacy, reminding you that you are loved and cherished no matter what. He is a true gem, a partner who never fails to prioritise your pleasure and well-being.

Thank you for reading! Request for my 1k follower celebration is open ♡

[milksnake-tea]

Hi hi hii!

May I have 2, 4, and 7 with Aventurine for the ask game? Have a nice day!

This man has a strong chokehold on me-

- 🪽

nah bro i totally get you that damn blonde im telling you .... him and his little >:3 are permanently etched into my brain .... THANKS FOR THE ASK !!! <3

2. What do you think their love language is?

My first thought was initially words of affirmation or acts of service, but now that I'm thinking about it, I think Aventurine would be a sucker for physical touch. The thing is, I personally believe that Aventurine is heavily touched starved, and a huge part of it is self-inflicted. There have been many times where he wanted to hold your hand, or lean onto your shoulder, or just have his hair played with, but he holds himself back because 1.) it's unprofessional and 2.) does he really want to deal with the implications of his actions? Even with friends (or the closest things he has to friends), he wants to be physically close to them, but he doesn't let himself be. The first time you held his hand, he stiffened like a block of wood. When you hugged him, and held him in his arms, he didn't know how to react - but it wasn't long until he closed his eyes and let himself slump against you.

4. What's an unpopular opinion you have?

i cant believe i have to say this BUT HE IS NOT A WHORE !!!!! Can he be clingy? Yes !! Can he be intentionally irritating and annoying? Yes !!! Can he come across as flirty? ABSOLUTELY. But what he isn't is someone who gives himself away at the drop of a hat. Intimacy and companionship, whether platonic or romantic, is something he desires, absolutely. But that doesn't mean he'll give it to just anyone. He has to respect you, he has to like you, he has to know you inside and out to ensure that you won't take advantage of his vulnerability.

I acknowledge that Aventurine often invites people to stab him in the back, but he does it with the prior knowledge that they'd likely do it, so he isn't surprised about it. But when it comes to true companions, not the "friends" he collects like chips, he needs to be able to trust you in all of your entirety. Yes, he has a very low view of himself, but it's not to the degree where he'd willingly use his body in that way to get what he wants.

7. What kind of person do you think Aventurine wants in a relationship?

The real question is whether or not he'll allow himself the liberty of getting into a relationship in the first place. But if I'm going to be honest, I see Aventurine as someone who values honesty and self-reliance, and admires those who are true to themselves and their ideals despite it all (example: Topaz and Dr. Ratio, both of whom he respects and admires as colleagues). So when it comes to being in a relationship, he doesn't want to stress himself out with the mind games; banter, sure, but he doesn't need another person to tip toe around.

Aventurine would want someone who isn't afraid to ask for what they want, or tell him off when he needs to be, yet is genuine, kind and earnest. He also would want someone who could at least take care of themself - as harsh as it sounds, he can't always be there to protect you, and he needs to know that you'll be okay even if he isn't there (also because he finds strength, both intellectual and physical, to be pretty attractive).

It's kind of sad, though. The kind of people Aventurine finds himself attracted to are often the type who end up disliking him.

2k follower event if you want to participate !!!

[meanbossart]

You know the Hag casts Vicious Mockery, right? Some of her lines are really fucking mean, lol. To Astarion, she says, "Deep down, you like to be leashed, don't you?" and there's another about the stink of rats on him. To a male drow player, she says something like, "On your knees, boy, just like the matriarchs taught you." She's got something for every race and class, and special stuff for companions.

Anyway. What is something personal and deeply hurtful that she might say to Drow to derail him?

What are his triggers in general, if any? Stuff that will anger him "randomly", in the sense that someone close to him might not understand why he was triggered (and perhaps he might not understand either)?

I had know no clue actually LOL since I found out you can cast silence on her and kill her in two turns I have never given that woman much time to get a word in 😂

DU drow is, unsurprisingly, pretty volatile. Earlier in the campaign when he's fresh off the nautiloid I could think of a few things that may set him off quickly (later, and in ANE, he's much more subdued though, and it depends more on who says it and the kind of day that he's having lol)

Some things that get particularly on his nerves:

-Belittling him, implying that his body and attitude are just a front for his weaknesses. The fastest way to buy a fight with him is to just laugh at everything he says and does and not take him seriously at all. -He's at times insecure about making his loved one's (Astarion & Shadowheart's) lives worse by being around them. Present him any example of how that may be true and you'll have a very sad/angry drow. -Treat him like a wounded animal that just needs a hug and a pet and he'll get all better, it will annoy him even if you have good intentions. -Insist on something after he says "no". Even a little bit. Even if it's silly. You can speedrun any of these by being a female drow. SO for the actual crux of the question, here's a few strong contenders for Vicious Mockery lines that Ethel could blast DU drow with (CONTENT WARNING: IT'S AUNTIE ETHEL.) :

-"Bark, bark, bark, little dog, It don't make you look any scarier"

-"You trying to kill me or fuck me? Or kill me to fuck me? Or fuck me to kill me, pork-chop? "

-(Imitating a crying baby) "That's what you sound like to everyone around you, little boy."

-"Daddy's gonna be so, so disappointed. I'd clench up my hole, if I were you."

-"Such big swings for a drooling, inbred lech."

[yuurei20]

Does Idia have any peeps that he can get along with, other than Ortho?

Hello hello! Thank you for this question!!

This may depend on your definition of "get along with"!

Idia himself has said that he has no friends at the school and that his "one and only trusted companion" is Muscle Red, so he personally does not seem to think so!

But it is common for characters in the game to say things that are not necessarily true, and it is possible that Idia is actually closer to Azul than even he himself is aware of.

We see Azul mention wanting to invite Idia to a celebration of their housewarden appointments in September, and during Glorious Masquerade Idia himself says that he wishes Azul were in his group (in order to balance out Rook with "some shadiness").

Idia also says that he knows Azul being friendly equates to him being "up to no good" and that what Azul wishes for during the Wish Upon a Star event is "a very Azul wish," so it seems he knows Azul decently well!

Idia is also not fooled by Azul's apparent self-sacrifice in the fight against Rollo.

For all Azul's channels of information, however, he did not know about Idia's family (while Leona did), and seems to sincerely suggest that Idia might release them after they have been kidnapped, so Idia may know Azul better than Azul knows Idia.

When Idia needs to change out a part inside of Ortho, Azul is who Idia goes to for help, and we have examples of both characters translating what the other says into layman's terms for other people.

While it is unlikely that either would call the other a friend (the characters slowly coming to terms with the word "friend" seems to be the underlying theme of the entire game), if I had to argue that there is a character besides Ortho that we have seen Idia get along with, I would say Azul! :>

(For a more detailed summary of Azul and Idia's various interactions, there is this video! ↓)f

[lincolndjarin]

Every Now and Then - ch. two

[ And if You Only Hold Me Tight ]

pairing : joel miller x f!reader, platonicsoulmate!tommy & f!reader

word count : 9.3k

summary : you spend some time tommy, you spent some time with joel.

tags/warnings : 18+ mdni, angst, canon typical violence, language, panic attacks, violence, injury, wounds, possessive behavior, toxic relationships, animal death, i probs missed some i never know how to tag so lmk if i misses anything !!

a/n : this took so long and i dont even know it its good so i'm deeply sorry about that.

ao3 .𖥔 ݁ ˖ series masterlist .𖥔 ݁ ˖ main masterlist .𖥔 ݁ ˖ kofi

Now - JACKSON, WYOMING : 2023

“It’s nice to meet you Ellie.” You hold your hand out across the table to her, offering your own name up in the process, noticing an incredulous look in her eyes as you say it. Of course she doesn’t shake it, you’ve worked with enough survivors her age to know how they think. 

She doesn’t trust any of this, and you can’t blame her. Every single thing she’s seen since arriving here is too good to be true, she’s waiting for the other shoe to drop. That’s okay, you can be patient. She just needs to learn how to be a kid again. When she makes no attempt to move you pull your hand back, your smile never wavering. You’ve met kids in much worse condition than this, you can work with this. 

“Why don’t you tell me a little bit about yourself, Ellie.” You set the notebook you’d been writing in back down onto the table, you don’t want this to feel like an interrogation for her, it needs to be a conversation or you won’t get any of the information you need.

“Like what?” She’s slouched down into the chair, her arms crossed across her chest. She has her defenses up, she has spent her entire life protecting herself, she isn’t going to stop just because a stranger offered her a mug of tea. A mug of tea that she has notably not touched. 

“Anything you want to, or I could ask some specifics if you’d like.” You take a sip of your own tea, hoping it might show her it’s safe. She only hums in response, you decide it might be for the best if you just ask her what you need to know. “Let’s start with a few easy ones, how old are you?” 

“Why do you need to know?” 

“We need to assess your health, what classes you’ll be put in, if you’ll be needing any feminine products. I promise, anything I ask is for your own good.” Seeing kids like Ellie is a painful reminder of just how lucky your own little ones are, it’s a wonder she made it this far. You can’t hold her skepticism against her, her distrust is why she’s still alive. “Would it help if we brought your father in? He’s just down the hall with Maria.” You aren’t sure why, you typically handle every stray but she had insisted on helping you out today. She’d spewed some sort of excuse about how Ellie might need some special attention but as far as you can tell she’s in the same state that most kids are in when they arrive. 

“He’s not my dad.” She’s quick to say it, as if it’s a sore subject. 

“May I ask his relation to you then?” Maria had told you she arrived with her father, you were told to expect one teenage girl and one man in his fifties.

“He’s… my friend?” She sounds unsure, unsure enough to ring alarm bells in your head. 

“Honey, are you in a safe situation? We can help you if you need-” She doesn’t even let you finish your question before sitting up straighter.

“No, no, no, gross, it’s not like that, he’s not like that.” The look of disgust on her face brings you immense relief, this world is full of enough horrors for a young woman to face. 

“Okay, I just wanted to make sure.” Even if she hasn’t been through that, she hasn’t had it easy, no one has. But there’s something distinct in her eyes. Loss. She’s seen more than enough of it, more than anyone her age should. Her eyes keep darting to the door, her head tilts in that direction every time someone walks by. She’s worried about her companion. She doesn’t want to lose him too. “I know none of this makes sense, and you have no reason to trust me but I need you to try Ellie. And if I ask you anything you aren’t comfortable with then you don’t have to answer but I need you to try, please. The faster we finish up here, the faster you can get back to your friend.” 

She takes a moment, you’re practically holding your breath when she finally nods.

Perfect, you can work with a nod. You love a nod, a nod is all you need to help this girl.

“Let’s start with your age again.” 

“Fourteen.” You’ll have to have a menstruation kit sent to whatever house they put her in, most people’s cycles start being regular once after a few months in Jackson.

“Thank you.” All you get is another nod yet you can’t help but smile. “Do you know where you were born?”

“No.” Her eyes are trained on your shoes, occasionally darting around the room but staying low for the most part. 

“Where did you grow up?” 

“The QZ.” The thought makes you sick for several reasons. The last place a child should grow up is the streets of a quarantine zone, even if she was in the FEDRA program it wouldn’t have been easy. The thought of any QZ still makes you queasy, even after this long. 

“Which one?” Anywhere but Boston. 

“Boston.” Of course. With your luck she would be. Someone’s far from home.  

“FEDRA program?” As terrible as they are, they always keep the kids' vaccinations up to date, one less thing for you to worry about. 

“Mhmm.” 

“How old were you when you left?”

“Fourteen.” How the hell did she make it to Jackson all the way from Boston in such a short period of time? Why come to Jackson at all? There’s certainly other QZ’s between here and there, there’s probably other settlements too. 

“Can I ask why you left?” It’s not a question you need to ask but your stomach is in knots at the mention of the Boston QZ and you can’t help yourself. 

“I’d rather you didn’t.” Something flashes across her face, she isn’t trying to be rude, she simply doesn’t want to talk about it. 

“That’s fine.” You don’t need to worry about it. She doesn’t know him. There’s no reason for her to know him. QZ’s house hundreds, if not thousands, of people. There’s no reason to spiral over nothing. “Do you have any allergies that you’re aware of?”

“Nope.” She makes a popping sound on the “P” as she leans back in the chair, trying to look relaxed despite how on edge she still is. You decide not to put anymore pressure on her, it won’t do you any good. 

“How are you feeling physically? Any symptoms of illness?”

“Like infection?” You have to stifle a laugh, if she was infected the two of you certainly wouldn’t be sitting here right now. 

“I’m not worried about that, I mean something more like a runny nose or a cough.”

“Oh. No.” 

“Any skills in particular you’d like to learn? Our school system is a little less traditional than what you probably had with FEDRA.”

“I like science.” She sits up a bit, good, you’ve found something that piques her interest. 

“Then I will make sure you’re enrolled in some science classes. But I meant skills like agriculture, construction, or veterinary care. Something you could learn about that interests you. You won’t be asked to help out around town until you’re sixteen but we like to let you explore different things to see what you like-”

“Could I learn how to shoot a gun?” She leans forward before you can finish your thought. 

“You could apprentice some of the hunters, we could also have you trained for patrol and scavenging which involves gun safety and training courses. You’re a bit young for those but I’m sure I could ”

“Really?” You can tell by the inflection in her voice that she still doesn’t trust you entirely, even if she’s excited.

“Of course, you’ll probably be the youngest student in the training class but I’m sure you can handle it.” She needs something good in her life. You want to protect everyone who finds their way to Jackson but this girl makes your heart ache. Most adults you’ve worked with aren’t able to hold themselves together this long, putting on a brave face despite everything. 

“Do you like burgers?” You almost cringe as you say it, hoping she’s had food outside of the synthetic shit FEDRA produces.

“I guess?”

“I’m having a little cookout tomorrow evening once everyone’s finished their work, it’ll be small, just me and some family but you’re welcome to join. You can bring your friend, I have two little ones you can play with. They might be a little younger than your usual friends but I promise they’re great company.” You swear she almost smiles, and suddenly you just want to make this poor kid smile. “You know, I’ve got a telescope in my garage, so if you stop by it’s all yours.”

“Seriously?”

“Absolutely, I’ve never even touched the thing so maybe you can put it to good use. Let me write down the house description for you, it isn’t too far from this building, you can stop in whenever you want tomorrow. There’s an empty house across the street as well, maybe I could show it to you, see if you like it.” You pencil it down, tearing the paper and handing it to her. This isn’t something you’d typically do but you can’t resist an opportunity to help her feel more at home here. 

“Yeah, I mean that would be great.”

“Perfect.” You lean back in your chair. “What sort of hobbies interest you?” You’ll be in charge of putting together a welcome basket for her since Maria has marked her down as a permanent occupant.

“Reading, I like comics. And I used to draw a lot in the QZ.” Perfect, books are easy to find since Jackson was built around a small library.

“Okay then, I think that’s all I need from you for now but I’ll be around soon once you get housing settled. You can go join Maria and your friend if you’d like, I have to figure out what house we’re going to put you two in but I’ll be stopping by later with a few things for you.” That actually isn’t all you need from her, there are more questions on your mind, one specific question. Ask her what his name is. 

“Thanks.” She stands, quickly heading towards the exit as you grab your notebook, you need to make a list of everything they’ll be needing. 

You shouldn’t. If by some stroke of misfortune you’re right this question will only serve to destroy everything you’ve worked so hard to push away. You shouldn’t.

But you do. 

Before she’s out the door you call out her name, you don’t want to know, but you have to.

“Ellie, what’s your friend's name?”

You found the treehouse two months after you found Jackson. 

With tears streaming down your face you had dropped the twins off at Maria’s, mumbling apologies before going to the edge of town, a large amount of Jackson was empty, and still is. They’re planning for the future. Someday, generations from now, the town will grow and they’ll use these houses to accommodate families. But for now it’s just an empty town, one that you realized had a treehouse. You had hidden yourself away there, curling up into a ball to become as small as possible.

Tommy had found you hours later, shivering, with no more tears left to cry. And he hadn’t chastised you or asked you why you’d done it, he’d just taken your hand and walked you home. It doesn’t take him hours this time, only about thirty minutes according to your watch. You hear the crunch of his boots, the walking pattern you recognize as his, and the creak of the boards as he pushes the hatch open before sliding up into the small space with you. 

Before he speaks you’re already reaching for him, desperate to cling to some kind of familiar safety. 

“Hey darlin’.” It’s a dance you two do, fluid and instinctual as he pulls you into his arms, you slot yourself between his bent legs as he wraps himself around you. You used to sit like this when you couldn’t find shelter on snowy nights, one of the many habits you had trouble breaking when you found Jackson. Maria would never ask you to change your relationship with him, it was a decision you had made with Tommy when he told you he wanted to marry her. A part of you just sort of knew she didn’t like it, so you stopped. And you’d never hold that against her, if the roles were reversed you certainly wouldn’t be as kind as she’s been. That’s why you’ve always loved Maria, since the first day you met her she has been like a sister, patient but blunt with you. 

Except in this one instance. 

She withheld some particularly important information.

“The twins?” You lay back against him as you mumble.

“Maria’s watching them. They’re helping her make dinner, you shoulda’ seen them in the kitchen. I swear she’s the only person they listen…” His voice trails off when he feels you tensing up all over again as you go back to fighting off tears.

A silence falls between you, familiar and reminiscent of your first few days together out in the woods. And just like back then, you’re the one to break it. 

“Have you seen him yet?” The words feel small and hoarse in your throat.

“No. Couldn’t bring myself to.” He rests his chin on your shoulder, you wish you could find comfort in any of this but there’s just too much dread. Too much unease fills your stomach to relax. 

“Does he know you’re here?” You wish your voice didn’t tremble so much.

“Maria didn’t tell him.” 

“Are we sure it’s even him?” 

“Not a lot of Joel Millers walking around during the apocalypse.” It’s like he can sense your skepticism as he quickly continues. “She said he looked like a Miller.”

“What does that even mean?”

“Like me but grayer.” Fair enough.

“Does he know I’m here?” There’s no way. He couldn’t. 

“No.” 

“Good.” 

“Can’t stay that way forever.” You know that. But you don’t have anything to say about it so you move on, and redirect the anger that mixes with your confusion and fear.

“Why didn’t she tell us?” He can’t take your side in this, as much as you want him to, he has to take her side because her’s is the rational one. Do you have a side? Can you be mad at her for this? Are there even sides?

“Probably because she knew we’d react like this.” His head tilts a bit to rest against your own. You’re thankful for this position so you don’t have to look him in the eye.

“She should have told us.” You’re trying to remain calm but your voice is pitching up higher by the minute. 

“She was going to, she just didn’t know how. She thought she had more time” 

You need to relax. It feels like your heart is going to burst from your chest and you’re certain Tommy feels it too. 

“How did he find us?” He wouldn’t have been looking for you specifically, unless he had a death wish. 

“On accident, I think. Maria said he was looking for me when they found him.” That makes sense. It’s just a coincidence that you’re also here. He has no way of knowing that you even know Tommy. How he managed to locate him is another matter. 

“We’re two thousand miles away from the QZ, how the fuck did he find you?”

“He always gets what he wants.” 

You can’t argue with that. Plain and simple, you don’t need much more than that. 

“I don’t want to see him.” An impossible request, but you make it anyway. 

“We both know that isn’t possible.” 

“Tell her to send him away.” Also unlikely. 

“You know she can’t do that, we don’t turn folks away from Jackson.” 

“Then I’ll leave.”

“Like hell you will.” There is no fight in his voice, just certainty as he holds you a little tighter. Not without me. The silent promise that lingers under his words, but it’s more complicated than that now, you have two toddlers and he has a wife, there is no running away from this. No running away from him

He’s inevitable. 

It doesn’t matter if the world ends, and you run halfway across the country, Joel Miller is inevitable.

“He’s got a kid.” You mumble as you reach for his hand, entwining your fingers with his. You hadn’t realized how cold you were until you felt the warmth of his skin against yours. 

He scoffs. “He’s got two.”

“Another kid, some girl. He brought her here all the way from Boston.”

He shifts a bit, clearly confused. “Why?”

“I was hoping you’d know, it isn’t exactly in his nature to help the needy.” 

He pauses for a moment. “Well, I mean, how old is she?”

“Fourteen.” 

“Well there’s your reason, Sarah was fourteen.”

Sarah.

A girl you know very little about other than the fact that she’s your daughter's namesake. Sarah Ruth Miller. It had been Tommy’s idea, you had only picked out a name for a boy and you owed Tommy everything for keeping you alive that long, so when he asked if he could pick his niece's middle name you’d been more than happy to oblige. 

It hadn’t been Joel who told you about Sarah, he never even told you he had a kid. 

Tommy had told you about it just before the twins were born. You’d been snowed into a cabin and he’d just returned from hunting with a grin on his face as he told you he had a surprise. You couldn’t sleep, between the cold and the pain in your lower back you were just too uncomfortable most nights. Tommy always insisted on staying up to keep you company even if he ended up falling asleep most of the time. 

That night he told you about how he lost his niece on outbreak day as he skinned the fox he’d caught in one of his traps as you sat beside him in front of the crumbling fireplace. When he finished the story he held up the pelt and told you he was going to make your babies first blanket with it. 

Of course at the time neither of you knew that he would have to make a second blanket, or that he would need to do it a month sooner than either of you had planned. 

“I invited him to dinner tomorrow.” No sense in hiding the fact from him, he’ll find out either way. 

“What?” His hand tightens around yours and it’s your turn to comfort him as your thumb rubs circles against the tense skin.

“Ellie- the kid, I invited her before I knew about Joel. Even told her she could bring him.” You almost laugh at how ridiculous it all sounds now. Of course you invited him to dinner completely by accident, sounds like something you would do. 

“Then why don’t we just get it over with?” Or you could leave, brave the Wyoming wilderness with your kids and his wife and make a run for it, far, far, away from Joel Miller. 

But you can’t do that. 

So you might as well get it over with. 

“Together?” You bring his hand up to your face to warm the icy skin of your cheek.

“Together.” 

He means it. He stays with you until the next day, walking you back into town and bringing you to his house. Maria starts apologizing the second the two of you walk through the door but you just hug her. She doesn’t owe you anything, any anger you thought you felt towards her was misplaced. 

And you all settle in for the night. 

On particularly bad nights you’ll spend the night at their house. It’s been happening less and less these last few months but it’s an unspoken decision tonight as Maria brings down sleeping bags from the attic for the kids. 

You tuck the kids in by the fireplace, hoping that they don’t catch the vacant look in your eyes as you kiss their foreheads. Thankfully they both seem to be too excited about having a living room campout to notice. You hear hushed whispers from the kitchen, it sounds like an argument so you just sit on the couch, wrapping a blanket around yourself as you stare out the window facing the street. 

What house did she put them in? There are a few options for temporary housing, but he could be anywhere. The thought makes you nauseous. Thankfully you’re distracted when you eventually hear Maria stomping up the stairs followed by a sigh from the kitchen before Tommy joins you on the couch. 

“Everything all right?” You mumble, hoping to not wake the kids as you offer up some of the blanket to him. 

“It will be.”

God you hope so.

“How do you wanna do this?” 

Good question. 

Preferably you wouldn’t be doing this at all, instead you would be enjoying what might be the last nice day before autumn sets in entirely. You, Arthur, Ruth, Tommy, and Maria. You’d still be happy if Ellie came over by herself but that’s so unlikely you don’t even consider it an option. Joel’s too protective and you confirmed with Maria that Ellie would be coming. He won’t let her go alone, you know that better than anyone. 

You rub the back of your neck with your freehand. “The kids stay inside with Maria.” Ruth is already there, helping her aunt with the salad as Arthur sits in your lap, playing with a few stones he’s set up on the picnic table. 

“Okay.” Tommy’s biting his nails, you’d spent weeks reprimanding him about that until he broke the habit.  

Your knee starts bouncing, a nervous habit of your own that you’ve had for as long you can remember. Thankfully Arthur simply hums to himself as you bounce him. As far as you can tell neither one of the twins knows something is wrong, you can only hope it stays that way. 

“We can wait for them out here, I can ask Ellie to go in and help Maria with the kids.”

“And then?”

You frown in contemplation. “I haven’t planned that far ahead.”

“So you didn’t plan for the most important part?”

“Did you?” 

His teeth shift when you ask, biting down hard enough to split his nail lower than he intended. You watch as blood blooms there while he curses under his breath.   

“Shit, go inside and grab a bandage, they’re in the cabinet above the sink.” He stands as you wave him towards the house, he brings his thumb to his mouth, his brow furrowed. “And bring Maria and Ruth out with you when you come back so we can go over everything with her.” He nods, humming in response before he disappears behind the screen door.

“Is Uncle Tommy okay?” When you look down you’re met with a worried look plastered on your son's face. You instinctively cup his face with your hand, using your thumb to smooth out the wrinkle between his brows. He looks too much like his father when he does that. 

“He’s okay, love. He’s just gotta go get your Aunt and Ruth.” You lean down, kissing his forehead before turning to set him down next to you. 

“Okay, Mama.” He seems satisfied with your response as he gives your leg a little pat before running off towards the edge of the yard. You’ve got a patch of rocks and gravel the kids like to dig through. You turn to watch him, with your back now leaning against the picnic table as he crouches down, examining the ground before finding a suitable stone. Clutching it in his hand he rushes back to you, holding it up for your approval.

“Very pretty, thank you.” You take it from him with a smile, setting it behind you on the table with the rest of them. He repeats the process several times, staring down at the ground, scrutinizing each rock before bringing the ones he deems good enough over to you. You give appropriate oo’s and ah’s to each one, grateful for the brief peace your son is able to give you. He carries on with this for sometime, until you have a sizable pile of rocks beside you. 

He leaves, and he returns, dozens of times until he decides not to return to the patch of gravel. 

You thank him for the speckled stone he hands you now but instead of running back across the yard he squints, staring up at your expression. 

“What’s wrong?” He hops up onto the bench next to you, grabbing the sleeve of your shirt and bunching it up in his little fist as you give him a soft smile.

“Nothing’s wrong, hon.” You ruffle his hair a bit but he doesn’t seem convinced. 

“Why’d you make a mad face then? Uncle Tommy too.” 

So much for the kids being clueless, they’ve always been too smart for their own good. 

Shit.

You sigh, looking up at the clouds briefly before looking back down at him.

No sense in lying to him. “You know how Uncle Tommy has a brother?” You wrap an arm around him, pulling him close.

His face scrunches up a bit as he thinks. “Yeah…” He doesn’t sound entirely convinced as you give him a reassuring smile. 

“Well, we don’t really- we don’t always get along with Uncle Tommy’s brother, and he’s gonna be visiting us soon.” 

“Why?” 

“He’s in Jackson for a little bit, and he came a long way to get here-”

“No Mama, why don’t you like him?”

This is a conversation you had hoped to have with your children when they’re older. Preferably it would be one you wouldn’t have to have at all, but it’s just another unavoidable part of Joel. They’re already old enough to ask questions, it started when kids in their class began asking if Tommy was their dad. Which of course led to the twins asking you one night just before bed the same question. 

“No love, he’s your uncle, who told you that?” You don’t want that rumor going around, people already talk about it, it doesn’t help that they both bear a resemblance to him.

“No one, Annie asked us.” Your daughter answers as you brush some of her hair behind her ear.  You recognize the name, it’s a girl in their daycare class. 

“And what did you tell her?”

“That we just got a mom.” Ruth answers but Arthur picks up the second she’s finished speaking. 

“Do we have a dad?” He tilts his head to the side as you swallow loudly. 

“Yes, you do.”

“Where?” Ruth asks. 

Last you’d heard he was in Boston. 

“I’m not sure.” They turn and look at each other before turning in unison towards you, you should have known they wouldn’t take that answer. “We lived together for a little while, in New York, and then we got separated.” None of that means anything to either of them but it’s an answer, which is better than nothing.

Arthurs tiny hand squeezes yours, pulling you back into reality. You often wonder if they know when you’re lost in a memory, he looks up at you curiously. What did you do to deserve such a patient child? 

You take a moment to think of a way to phrase it. “We… got into a fight. A long time ago.”

“About what?”

“Grown up stuff.” Your heartbeat quickens, you don’t want him to know about all that, he’s too little, you need to end this conversation.

“What kin-“ When he starts another line of questioning you poke at his sides, sliding him off the bench in a fit of giggles. 

“Time to go inside, nosy little man.” You follow after him as he rushes away, brown hair that’s just starting to curl at the ends falling into his eyes as he runs away from the house.

You catch up to him within a few steps, scooping him up and cradling him like a baby. He lets out a high pitched shriek until you squish your face into his cheek, kissing the rosy skin until he quiets down to a few small giggles. 

“Your aunt needs some help in the kitchen, you’re gonna go play with her and your sister now.” He nods as he squirms in your arms until he’s more comfortable, wrapping his arms around your neck and resting his chin on your shoulder as you walk him back towards the house. 

He’s gonna need a nap soon, which means Ruth is gonna need a nap soon. Maybe you should try and get them both down before everything else happens. 

Right on cue, Tommy pushes open the door with Ruth on his hip, Maria not far behind him. Based on the smiles they’re both sporting you can assume they’ve made up. They always do. 

“I think it might be time for these two to head inside.” Tommy gives you a soft smile and for a single second you get to pretend that everything’s fine. Maria takes a lighter towards the grill, trying to light it as you go to stand next to Tommy, the twins both grinning at each other. 

In your own little bubble, everything is completely fine, and you’re with your family. 

And at the end of your single perfect second the bubble is popped. It all happens before you’re ready, although you doubt you could ever really be ready for this. 

Maria pockets her lighter, mumbling something about going inside to look for matches after a few unsuccessful attempts. You set Arthur down, nudging him in her direction, he quickly runs towards her, taking her hand as she begins to make her way back towards the house. Tommy wraps his free hand around your shoulder. Giving you a reassuring squeeze as you rest your head against him to stare at your little girl. 

“We’ve got this.” He gives you another squeeze but you’re struggling to find safety in it. He’s always been the strong one, the confrontational one. He’s got this. You don’t. You tilt your head to stare at him when Ruth’s gaze goes from your face to his but your head snaps to the side when you hear your name called. 

Everyone looks up. The twins, Maria, Tommy, and you, as Ellie walks around the side of the house and waves at you. The sound of your name makes the man walking behind her look as well, his all too familiar scowl scanning the yard, softening into a look of disbelief when his eyes settle on you.

Then - NEW YORK CITY, QUARANTINE ZONE : 2019

“I don’t like havin’ you out there on your own. I worry too much.” He mumbles the words against the back of your neck as he tightens his hold around your waist. At some point the two of you had stopped pretending you’d wake up any other way and just went to bed like this. “Stay here, angel.” 

You’re so comfortable you almost consider it, but you ran out of cards last week and you’re cleared for work as of today. “I have to go if I want to sign up for any of the well paying shifts, Joel.” You peel his arms off of you, sitting up as he matches your movements. 

“Don’t sign up for that shit, it’s always somethin’ stupid or dangerous.” His voice is low and thick with sleep as he wraps his arms back around you. “If you need somethin’ I’ll get it for you.” He hasn’t shaved in a few weeks, his coarse facial hair rubs against your shoulder as he murmurs. 

Who knew big, scary Joel Miller could be so clingy. 

The most surprising part of your relationship, if you could even call it that, with Joel is just how needy he is. You don’t have any problems with it, it’s just a bit of a shock. Although maybe needy isn’t the right word. 

Protective. 

You’ve left the apartment two times in total since moving in with Joel, both times you insisted on needing air much to his dismay. He accompanied you around the block without a word the first time. The second time was the same, the only difference was that you stopped to buy a small bag of buttons, Joel had frowned as you made small talk with the older man sitting behind the table before rushing you home. 

“You could have just told me you needed buttons.” He grumbles as he holds the door open for you as you make your way to the kitchen table, taking a seat as you take his flannel off of you, the sight of your tattered sports bra serves as a reminder of how badly you need to get back to work once you’re cleared. 

“I don’t need buttons, you do. Every shirt you own is missing at least one.” You laid the shirt down on the table, pointing to the drawer next to the sink. “Get me the sewing kit.” His frown deepens but he does as you say before sitting down across from you.

Reaching across the table he sets the box down beside you, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “Still, you should have just asked me.” 

You open the small tin, unspooling a bit of thread. “I needed to go outside for a few minutes, it’s stuffy in here.” 

“We could have opened a window.” He grumbles under his breath as you grin, holding the thread between your teeth while sliding the other end through the needle.

“It’s not the same and you know it.” You mumble through your teeth before releasing the thread and setting the needle down. You pour the buttons out onto the table, searching for one that best matches the beige of the buttons on the flannel. Eventually his hand encompasses your own as he guides you to one that’s a slightly different shape but matches the color perfectly. “Thank you.” You give him a teasing smile as you place it over the frayed threads where its predecessor once was. 

That was a week ago and you haven’t been outside since but when Joel went to get the mail from downstairs he brought you a notice from the doctor that you were cleared to return to work today. Despite his protests you start to push the blanket off of you but he’s quick to pull it right back up into place.

“Stay, please.” He continues to hum against your skin. 

“I need the money, Joel.” You turn to look at him, his usual morning sulky look seems doubled today.

“How much do you need?” He raises an eyebrow at you as he lets his face fall forward, his forehead resting on yours. 

“It’s not like that.” You swear, if you asked him to, he'd find a way to give you the moon and stars, but you hate relying on him for everything, especially after such a long time of being dependent on him. “I just need to work.”

“You don’t need to. You want to.” His breath still smells like whiskey from last night as he gives you an exasperated glare. 

“Fine, I want to work. My leg’s fine now, you can barely tell anything was wrong with it. I’ll be okay.” You lean just a bit more towards him, kissing his cheek before sliding out of bed. 

You aren’t exactly dating Joel. 

Dating seems so trivial during an apocalypse, and you haven’t had any conversations about it. It just sort of happened. You woke up one day and neither one of you wanted to pull away from the other, and it progressed from there. He came home from a job one night and climbed into bed next to you, wrapping himself around you and he kissed your forehead before falling asleep. You still don’t know if he knew you were awake. The next night you’d taken his face in your hands and kissed him, just to see what he’d do, thankfully after a moment of shock he’d kissed you back. And it just became another unspoken part of your life with Joel. He kissed you goodbye when he left to go do the things he refused to tell you about in any detail, and you always greeted him with a kiss when he returned. 

But you don’t have sex. 

You want to ask him why but you hold your tongue, it’s possible you’re just being impatient or maybe he just wants to wait. So you don’t push it or bring it up because you like how things are with him. 

The word boyfriend is not a word that suits Joel. 

He isn’t your boyfriend, he’s just sort of, yours. 

“Angel, please.” He continues his griping as he pinches the bridge of his nose. 

“Joel, please.” You repeat back at him, trying to mimic his low tone.  

“I’m bein’ serious. Things have gotten bad out there recently, too much FEDRA bullshit.” 

“It’s always been bad and I’ve always managed, I’ll be fine.” You pull one of his shirts out of the closet, slipping it on, starting to button it as he makes his way to the end of the bed. 

“Can we at least talk about this?” He rests his elbows on his knees as he hunches over. The morning haze on his face is gone and is replaced by the stern scowl you’re used to. 

“There isn’t anything to talk about. I’ll be careful, there’s nothing to worry about, I’ll see you tonight.” After digging through the dresser drawers you eventually find your only pair of jeans. Once your boots are laced you walk back over to him, standing between his legs and taking his face in your hands. 

Staring down into his surprisingly gentle eyes, so dark that in the dim morning light they look pitch black. 

God he’s pretty. 

Even with that stupid pout of his. 

“I’ll see you tonight.” You lean down, placing a kiss on his forehead before pulling away only to be stopped when his grip on your waist tightens. 

“Just- wait.” You’re about to push him away with a laugh but his voice cracks just enough to make your smile drop. 

You start to speak in a soft tone but you only get one word out. “Joel…” 

“Please- I just- I can’t let you go out there and sign up for that shit. There’s jobs that aren’t dangerous, simple stuff.”

“Those jobs pay a few cards at best, hon. I can’t wear your clothes forever, I need new underwear, socks, all sorts of things. And I want to contribute around here, I’ll be okay, I promise.” You push the mess of hair falling across his forehead back as you stare down at him. 

He looks so genuinely upset already and you haven’t even left yet, he’s making this far more difficult than you thought it’d be. “I won’t be able to do anything if I don’t know you’re safe. It’s dangerous for both of us, I can’t be distracted like that.” You sigh, long and loud as you drop your hands to your sides. 

The more you think about it the more it makes sense. He really does worry too much, and even if you don’t know exactly what he does for work, you know it’s dangerous. 

Maybe it won’t be so bad. 

“Okay.” You groan. 

“You’ll stay?” The corners of his mouth start to raise a bit. 

“I’ll do the safer jobs.” The hint of a smile that had been on his face dissipates. “It’s a compromise. You can’t always get everything you want.” 

“Fine, come right home after.”

“I will.” With one more kiss he finally lets you go. 

So, at Joel’s request, you sign up for the easy jobs. 

They’re boring, and generally sort of terrible, and they pay the least, but Joel doesn’t make any further arguments about it. So you keep signing up for them. Typically it’s childcare, or filing documents for FEDRA, or working in the entry level food processing jobs. 

Boring, boring, jobs that involve standing around and doing nothing or wrangling kids who don’t deserve to grow up in a place like this. You hate the look on their little faces, they always look too grown up for their ages. 

But you put up with it, because at the end of the day you get to go home to Joel, Joel who seems to be in significantly higher spirits ever since you’ve agreed to those specific jobs. So you make it work. He makes it worth the banality of it all, at the end of your first week back to work he surprised you with a large paper bag, grinning like you’d never seen him before. When you unfolded the crumpled bag you were greeted with a mess of fabric, different colors and textures. You poured the contents onto the bed and immediately realized what he’d gotten you. Bras, panties, socks, and two pairs of jeans. It must’ve cost him a fortune and your eyes began to water immediately. You had wrapped your arms around him, barely letting go of him for the rest of the night. 

After that it got even easier, eventually you got used to it. 

You learned to live with the terrible jobs, and if you wanted anything you couldn’t afford with your meager savings Joel always managed to get it for you, even if you hadn’t told him you’d wanted it in the first place. 

You probably would have stayed like that forever if you hadn’t started taking the long way home. Weeks had passed before it happened, you had grown comfortable, vulnerable. Joel always made sure you felt safe and you let your guard down just long enough for something to happen. 

Joel had left early that morning, telling you that he was gonna be late, before he kissed you, he was out the door before the sun came up. 

Whenever Joel told you he would be late you took the long way home. Winding back alleys that were mostly empty that always led back to the apartment building. It was just a treat for yourself, something to do to fill time that would be spent at home, waiting for him. 

You never had any issues or alterations. 

Until that afternoon. 

Joel will be late. 

So the second your shift is over you take the handful of cards and make your way through the city. And just like you’ve done every other time, you look behind you every once and a while but not nearly as much as you should. Because of this, you don’t see him until it’s too late. 

It’s a younger man, probably a year or two older than you at most peering around the last corner you turned. Once he knows he’s been seen his pace quickens and instinctively you do the same. 

“On the ground!” The second you hear it you pray it’s for someone else, it has to be, you’ve done nothing wrong. You walk faster, hoping to avoid what could be a messy confrontation when the sound of boots slamming on the pavement rushes towards you and you’re forced up against the wall of the alley. 

In your peripheral you catch the white text against the black of his uniform. 

FEDRA. 

Your knees are kicked from under you as he pins your arms behind your back, the force at which your head hits the stone has you dizzy as you try to catch your breath. Too much is happening too quickly, when you finally feel like you can use your voice the wind is knocked out of you as you feel him hit you in the side, hard enough to have you wondering if he broke a rib. The force of the hit makes your knees crumble completely as the officer lets you fall, only giving you enough time to get to your hands and knees before his boot slams into your stomach knocking you onto your side. 

Finally, when you roll over onto your back you get a clear look at him. He looks like your average FEDRA officer, the only thing out of place is the unsure look on his face. Your ears are ringing so you barely make out what he says, all you catch is something about thinking you were someone else, before he turns and leaves as if it never happened.

Leaving you alone to clutch your stomach and wonder what just happened, and what you did to deserve that. 

You’d never heard of random attacks from FEDRA before. Maybe in other zones, but the city has always been calm as far as that goes. Maybe things really did get worse while your leg was healing. 

Joel was right. 

That’s all you can think about as you stumble to get to your feet, everything hurts but now is not the time to assess your wounds, you need to get home before something else happens. You manage to hobble up the stairs of the building, nearly collapsing by the time you opened the door. 

You feel so stupid. 

Joel was right. 

It isn’t safe out there, at least not for you. No one fucks with Joel, no one attacks him on the street because they’re afraid of him. No ones afraid of you. 

It’s a long couple of hours after that. 

Mostly a lot of berating yourself as you try to take in the extent of the damage. 

Surprisingly it seems to mostly be surface level. Sure, you’re going to bruise pretty bad and your face got scraped up on the stones but nothing permanent seems to have been inflicted. 

Once you’ve showered and slipped into an old shirt of his and a pair of panties you climb into bed, wanting this day to just be over, but you know it isn’t. Right on schedule you hear the lock click as Joel steps through the front door, you hide your face in your pillow. 

“What are you still doin’ up? It’s almost midnight.” His voice is a low whisper as you hear the familiar sounds of him kicking off his boots and setting down his things. You hear the outer layer of his clothing hit the floor, you told him a while ago you thought it was gross that he slept in the clothes he wore all day. He started sleeping in his undershirt and boxers after that. “You okay, Darlin’?” The bed shifts as he sits beside you and the second you turn and look at him his jaw twitches. “Christ… what the hell happened? Who did this to you?” He’s managing to stay mostly calm but you’re already worried he’s going to blow. 

“It’s nothing, I just had an issue with an officer on my way-“

“This is not nothing.” He’s already fussing with your face as you take his hands and move them away from you. 

“Joel-“

“Tell me what happened.” It’s a command and you’re too tired to fabricate something, and for the first time in a while, you’re afraid. 

So you tell him exactly how it happened. And before you realize it’s happening you’re sniffling, a part of you feels like you’re about to be scolded for this but he only nods, never interrupting you until you’ve finished. 

Your vision’s blurry with tears when you look up at him, the weight of being attacked starts to weigh heavy as you realize just how lucky you were that that was all that happened. And then you say the words he’s been waiting to hear.

“You were right, Joel.” 

“I’m sorry, angel. I should have been there to protect you.” He holds his arms open and you don’t hesitate as you lean forward into him. You do your best to hold it together as he lays you down before clicking off the lamp and pulling you back against him. He softly scratches your back, kissing the top of your head as he does. It’s silent for a few more minutes until he suddenly whispers into the darkness. “Tell me you’ll stay here from now on.”

“Joel, I-“

“No more going out there without me. You’ll stay safe right here, no one can hurt you here, not while I’m around.” You open your mouth to argue again but stop yourself. 

He’s right. 

Now that you’ve calmed down you know that you’re lucky to even be alive. You don’t know why you were attacked but you know it could happen again, and there are worse things than being beaten. 

No one would hurt you here, not with Joel around. 

“Stay here, angel.” He murmurs, softer this time. 

Joel is right.

“Okay.”

He isn’t beside you when you wake up, your hands searching through the cold sheets seeking his warmth. He had mentioned something as you were falling asleep about an early morning supply run but you had hoped to say goodbye before he left, you wanted to make him breakfast. As you get ready to roll back over and sleep a bit more you’re startled into an upright position. 

“You should watch where you’re flying, angel.” You bite back a shriek as Tess’s voice comes from the direction of the kitchen. 

“Christ, you scared the hell out of me!” Your heart skips a beat as you reach over to the nightstand, pulling on the little chain that turns the lamp on. “Joel’s not even here, what are you doing?” You don’t like the idea of being alone with her, she doesn’t come around much anymore, you used to see her in the hall on her way here constantly, but after you moved in she stopped. 

You do your best not to flinch as she makes her way over to you, standing at the foot of the bed.

“I’m not here to hurt you, there’s no need for theatrics.” You hadn’t realized you were shaking so badly until she said it, it takes a conscious effort but you manage to stop it for the most part. “I’m just here to talk.”

“About what?” 

“About you and Joel.”

You don’t want to talk about that with Tess. You don’t want to talk to Tess at all, she frightens you and she knows it. 

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Don’t talk to me like I’m stupid.” This time when you flinch she hesitates. For a brief moment the facade of a woman who fears nothing drops, and you swear you see sympathy in her eyes. “Joel is dangerous, you need to be careful with him or you’re going to get hurt.”

Is that why she’s here? To try and break you up? 

“He won’t hurt me, he cares about me.” You wish you sounded more sure of yourself. 

“You’re right, at least for now.” She flips her pocket knife open, ever so carefully running the blade along the underside of her nails, scraping away any dirt or grime she so happens to find, you fight the urge to flinch again. When she finally looks back up at you she takes a moment, examining your expression as if this was an interrogation. “Being loved by him is the worst thing that could possibly happen to a girl like you.”

You can’t help but scoff, now look who’s being theatrical. “A girl like me?”

“Good, too good. And fragile.” She points at you with the blade before returning to her nails. “He’ll do anything to keep you safe, even if it means breaking you into tiny little pieces, just so you’ll fit in a box he can lock.” 

You’re about to call her a liar but you hesitate. “Why are you telling me this?”

“You deserve to know.”

“Okay, but why? You don’t even like me.”

“You wouldn’t be here if I didn’t like you.” 

Fair enough.

“I think you should go.” You don’t want to hear anything else. You don’t believe anything she’s saying and the entire conversation makes you feel sick. She doesn’t know anything about your relationship with him, and she clearly doesn’t know anything about Joel. He’d do anything for you, you don’t think you’ve ever been taken care of before you met him.  

“What do you know about glue traps?” She doesn’t make any effort to leave so you decide to just answer her with a sigh. 

“Like the ones you use to catch mice? I don’t know, Joel buys them sometimes.”

She points her knife in the direction of the corner of the room, it takes a moment for your eyes to adjust. Sure enough, in the corner of the room, peeking out from under his dresser, is the faint outline of something on the floor, you’d never noticed it before. 

“It’s the worst kind of way to catch a mouse.” She stands, walking across the room and peeling up the trap with the edge of her blade before snapping it shut and taking the edge of the trap between her fingers, dragging it across the floor to the middle of the room so you had a clear view of it. “They’ll do anything to get out.” The tip of her boot nudges the corner of the trap, now that it’s been dragged into the lamp light you can see exactly what she wanted to show you. Two things are in the bloody trap. A mouse, barely alive, based on the way its chest rises and falls, and something else. A caterpillar maybe? 

No. 

A leg. A bloody mouse leg, on the edge of the trap. 

“They’ll chew off their limbs, and peel off their own skin just to get out, the ones that manage to are lucky enough to bleed out somewhere else. The ones stuck in the trap though?” She nods down at the creature you now refuse to look at. “They’ve got it the worst. Suffocation, dehydration, the ones who try to peel off and can’t, bleed out, stuck in place.”   

With a sudden crunch, her boot slams down on the trap. You watch, slack jawed, as she peels it off the sole before tossing it in the bin in the corner. 

“I’d take a quick death over either of those.”

“I think you should leave. Now.” You try to sound authoritative but your voice trembles too much to sound anything but afraid. 

“I heard you got caught up in some FEDRA business yesterday.” She starts again but you’ve had enough.

“Tess.” You manage to have a bit of sterness this time in your tone but it doesn’t seem to affect her much. 

“Fine. I’ll leave. But don’t say I didn’t warn you.” You catch that sympathetic look one more time before she unlocks the door chain, twisting the doorknob before speaking one last time. “I noticed some of our inventory is missing, this is the only warning you’re gonna get about that. If you want shit like that just ask, I’m sure Joel would be more than happy to have another way to control you.” She doesn’t turn around when she says it, simply slamming the door and leaving. You have no clue what she’s talking about, but that isn’t the part of the conversation that sticks with you. All you can think about is that crunching sound. 

So you avoided her after that, writing off her words as an act of jealousy. 

Joel would never do anything to hurt you.

Of course you know better now. She was just like you, she had been in the glue trap herself when she tried to keep you from joining her, but you hadn’t listened, instead you’d fallen face first into Joel. And he wouldn't let you go without keeping some of you for himself.

i don't have a taglist anymore !! follow @lincolndjarinnotifs for updates on all fics !!

[darkmajesty-xo]

Ready Player 1 ? - Shigaraki x reader

18+ MDNI | masturbation, praise , video chats, crack-humor

most would consider it unwise for a girl like you to be in these chat rooms due to the questionable discourse and rather infamous patrons, but girls just wanna have fun right ?

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: saw an old couple today, could be me and shig but he’s playing ☹️

user2345: i think you mean planning* as in planning world domination and torment of quirkless losers like you.

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: oh sweetheart you’ll never get any pussy if you keep acting like one

user3333: damn bro, you gonna take that ?

user2345: who gives a shit about some villain groupie ?

user2345: she keeps her mouth so full of cum that it’s starting to affect her whore brain.

user2345: do you really think the true leader of the new world would make time for some dumb cunt like you ?

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: there’s probably a higher chance of tomura shigaraki and i living happily ever after than there is of ANY woman even looking in your direction.

this was a normal friday night, you simping over shigaraki in the forums and clapping back at the misogynistic incels that hid behind their keyboards in their mothers’ basements. but there was one guy that always stood up for you whenever the idiots got too out of hand. he was also a moderator so he had no problems blocking them.

the two of you would dm off and on about life , thoughts on hero society, hobbies , etc. from your chats you gathered that he didn’t walk that straight and narrow but that didn’t mean much to you. he would sometimes tease your about your crush on shigaraki and your general taste in men.

finalboss: honestly, what kind of girl likes a criminal?; who knows what kind of twisted shit the guys into— you’re not even a villain.

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: you know nothing jon snow

finalboss: that reference just confirmed btw

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: i’ll have you know that my beloved is a certified otaku fantasy nerd.

finalboss: oh yeah ? and how’d you obtain such info ?

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: i run 3 stan accounts on twitter and i belong to a shiggy fan club 🥹

finalboss: 😃

finalboss: seek help

finalboss: 😃

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: you wound me ☹️

finalboss: i’ll just leave that too your Prince Charming lol

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: oh lord , did you see the footage of his latest attack ?

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: he was dressed like a whoreee 😩😩

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: tits just out for my viewing pleasure

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: shigaraki is my shepherd, he know what i want.

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: wanna suck on those sugar nips and call him mommy

finalboss: you get weirder and weirder every time we chat

xoxo_|hisMC ✮: that means we’re becoming besties ㅤ♡ ︎

finalboss: ♡ ︎

it was nice having someone to talk to about your secret obsession, it’s not like your “real life” friends would understand. the two of you had carved out your own little piece of the internet to goof around in. he never disclosed much information about himself and typically kept the conversations focused on you, but you still felt an undeniable bond to this faceless stranger.

then he ghosted you.

weeks went by without a word from your friend. he no longer defended you in the forums and he didn’t respond to any of your dms. you’d started to get worried that he may have been arrested or worse. and at the three month mark you’d finally given up hope that you’d ever hear from your friend again. but then the unexpected happened.

finalboss is requesting to video chat.

this was completely out of character but after months with no word, you were desperate to hear from your friend.

you were prepared to chew him him out for abandoning you. thinking of all the ways you could insult him while simultaneously expressing your need for his comfort and company. but your mind went blank when the grainy screen loaded into the pixelated image of your companion.

whispy tendrils fell from his bun, framing the sculpted planes of his handsome face. his lips were dry, slightly chapped, with the only lubrication being the sheen of saliva left by the slow drag of his tongue. bloodied eyes bore into your own leaving you breathless and dazed.

“hey bestie”

his voice was low and raspy, almost like a whisper. a deep rumbling that echoed in your ear drums. it was oddly hypnotic. he was absolutely mesmerizing.

tomura chuckled into the camera, showing flashes of perfectly white teeth. he leans back into the chair, a hand on the back of his neck showcasing a broad chest and toned abs.

“didn’t expect you to be this quiet, bestie. is my outfit not slutty enough for you ? i could always take these off…” his hand fell from his neck to rest and the waistband of his black jeans.

you remained speechless, eyes glued to the light dusting of hair below his belly button.

more laughter and shifting. now you were met with the glorious girth of shigaraki’s cock clenched tightly in his fist. the darkened tip oozed a sparkling trail of pre that spilled down his length. his thumb swiped the fluid to spread over his veiny member.

“c’mon , doll. don’t leave me hanging” he teased, squeezing his fist upwards to produce more pre. “i thought you wanted to be my ‘mc’ ? seems more like an npc if you ask me”.

“y-you’re him” you stammered, eyes following the slow drag of his fist. “you’re tomura shigaraki”.

“in the flesh” he teased, shooting a wink that went directly between your legs. “well kinda, but we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. sorry i’ve been away so long, but you’d wait forever for me won’t you , perfect girl ?”

your nod was automatic. robotic even. you’d moved closer to the screen, completely engrossed by his ministrations.

“anything for you beyon—shiggy”

you both laughed at that. he appreciated your humor, especially with all the drama in his day to day. even in def con simp mode and being ghosted didn’t stop you from being undeniably you. that’s probably why he was as obsessed with you as you were with him.

“i know we probably have alot to discuss but todays been kind of shitty and i’d really like to explore our final fantasies”.

you snorted, “that was really bad , shig”.

he shrugged, “i’m a villain, not a comedian, beloved. “now show me that perfect little pussy”.

[nightylantern]

Gallagher x Reader; The Devil in Disguise

Pairings; Reader x Gallagher

Warnings; HUGE SPOILERS FOR THE 2.1 QUEST, also this isn’t canon, in other words the way they implied stuff at the end may be there to throw us off, this is a “what if”, if what was implied is true. Death mention, secrets, suspicions, already established relationship between the two

Creek

You glanced up to see a slightly tired Gallagher enter the room, noticing he looked slightly disheveled, on top of that he was a bit late.

“Gallagher? Are you okay, why are you so messy, didn’t you say you were having a meeting in regards to your job?” You headed over to him to help remove his vest and accessories, suddenly he grabbed your hand a bit frantically but nonetheless gave you a smile,

“I’m fine hon, just a bit of trouble on the way here, some hooligans on the streets were a bit to drunk,” he chuckled, and once again smiled, except it didn’t reach his eyes.

You knew something was up for a few days now, despite the fact that he kept his calm demeanour and relaxed behaviour, you knew something was up, and well it made sense. He explained to you that “Death” was among the dreamers and that a stowaway and the famous singer Robin, had been killed, thus he asked if you could simply stay inside. You knew he was working off the clock to figure out who could be behind it, but even so there was something…off…

You have known him for years now. How he approached you on the streets complementing you and serving you a drink, he wasn’t a bartender then, but he was exceptionally good. You eventually figured out his ties to the bloodhound family, which you didn’t mind but you found it odd how many of his coworkers never recognised him, to which he told you he simply did most of the work in the shadows.

Even with your suspicions you chalked it up to him being exhausted and him trying to prevent “Death” from taking any more people, so you simply kissed his cheek and told him you would prepare dinner, as well as the fact that he should go shower, to which he said he would as he headed for the bathroom.

Once he was in he closed the door and sighed. “Almost got caught,” he thought as he looked down at the inside of his vest and gloves, covered in the goo. He used them to cover up the remains of Sunday but he was also careful you wouldn’t find any of it on him and question him. He sighed again upon thinking of the events that had occurred before.

So what if he killed two prominent members of the family? The family, the supposed family that was open to peace and harmony, the family that had took away so much from many, the family that outed Mikhail as a traitor…Mikhail.

He would be lying to say he was doing all of this solely for Mikhail, but that didn’t mean that wasn’t one of his motives. Guilt eventually came at him for betraying his old companion, and then anger seeped in when figuring out that the family wasn’t all so innocent either. Naturally before he could strike he needed a good alias, and that’s where you came in.

He knew once a killer was a front, people would be less likely to suspect someone who not only was high in terms of security but also someone who had a lover, after all why risk their lover’s security when he planned to kill right? He knew you were the right one when meeting you, he complimented your looks to start small talk, not that he didn’t think you weren’t pretty, you were gorgeous. Then he kept meeting up with you and eventually you agreed to be his lover. At first everything was going according to plan, at least that’s what he thought.

He was using you from the beginning and yet, he grew fond of you, he truly cared about you and knew what he was doing could put you at risk, yet he was to far in deep to turn around and prioritised his plan above all. He wanted to break things off to protect you but at the same time, he couldn’t do it, and he didn’t know why.

He knew he wasn’t a good person, and knew you would be better off if you both were not together, but still. He didn’t know if it was love or simply respect, or anything in between but he truly did want to stay with you.

But it’s fine, all he has to do is to carry out the remaining tasks and finish his plan while also protecting you, and continue being a “minion”, of the enigmata without you knowing. All he has to do was continue to keep up his facade without any suspicion, all he ha-

“Gallagher, honey?” Your voice interrupted his inner monologue, wow he was actually getting into this anti hero role wasn’t he? “Are you okay? Do you need me to come in? You’ve been in there for a while and I didn’t hear any shower, just some mumbling…”

“Don’t worry! I was just zoning out, I’ll be out in a moment love, just give me some time,” he replied almost immediately. After hearing your footsteps leave he cleaned what he could of his clothing and took a nice shower before changing and coming outside to you setting the food on the table. “It’s fine, it will be over soon,�� he thought as he headed to the table. Even if it ends with deception, he just needs to be secretive just a tad bit longer and everything will be okay.

Once again nothing is canon, just my personal interpretation of him and his lover at the end of the quests, I hope you enjoyed this fic!

[fruitsoxs]

Secrets

pairing(s); Gale x (GN)reader/tav summary; After a night of spilling secrets, you open up about never having your first kiss. Gale offers to fix that. warning(s); mentions of drinking alcohol! reader/tav is a bard wordcount; 1.6k notes; a short and sweet fic as a treat

The atmosphere is lively as you strum the strings of your lute, playing a soft tune as your companions drink and talk. It’s been a rather heinous couple of days traveling through the wilderness. Although there is still some tension lurking between the members of the party, the fighting has died down. There even seems to be friendship growing between the seven of you. 

After all the hard work you deserve a little time to relax. You pause the music, and reach down to grab the bottle of wine sitting below you. You bring it to your lips and take a long sip. After emptying the bottle, you go back to strumming. Your playing has become rather clumsy as the alcohol settles in your system, but the others don’t seem to notice. You play a song about some great heroes, which seems to fit your situation perfectly. 

As the song nears the end, you look around the fire to others. Karlach and Shadowheart are having some deep discussion. Lae’zel is off to the side, cleaning blood off of her blade. Wyll is trying to talk to Astarion, a conversation that seems to be going nowhere. You tilt your head as you notice one of you is missing. 

You can’t seem to spot Gale anywhere. 

You set your lute down to the side and stand up slowly, careful not to fall back over. You twist your head to the left, then right. Looking for any sign of his purple robe. A small twinge of worry courses through you as you begin to walk around, looking in between the leaves of the trees. You’ve made it across the camp by the time you start hearing a voice muttering words you can't quite make out.

You find yourself walking towards the soft curses, stopping when you see your magic companion holding out his hand with a small ball of light in his palm. He’s sitting on a log, hunched over with his long brown hair hanging in front of his face. Resting by his side is a half empty bottle of wine. You can’t quite hear what he’s saying- so you take a step forward. A  branch snaps below you, causing Gale to turn around and face you. The light in his palm disappears, but you can still see the fear on his face. “Oh!” he exclaims, the fear falling away when he sees it’s you. “I wasn’t expecting anyone to be awake at this time.” he says, scooting over so you may join him on the log.

You wobble over, using the trunks of passing trees to keep yourself from falling over. He lets out a little chuckle as he watches you stumble closer. “How much have you had to drink, my friend?” he asks as you sit down next to him. You let out a small laugh. “Not too much, honestly.” He shoots you a questioning gaze before letting out a defeated sigh. “I suppose I can’t judge.” 

“You left the party.” You point out, tilting your head to the side. “Ah, yes. Don’t get me wrong, your playing was amazing- I just needed a moment to myself.” he tells you, his smile dropping. “Is everything all right?” You ask, worried about your favorite companion. 

He opens his mouth to tell you, but quickly shuts it again. It seems he’s unsure whether he wants to open up. “It’s… hard to talk about.” he finally says. He then goes quiet again, angling his body away. “That’s okay.” you reassure him, unsure how to help. He doesn’t answer. His face is unreadable, but you can tell that something is holding him down. The tension begins to get unbearable. So, in true drunk fashion, you elbow him in the arm with a sly smile. “Do you wanna know a secret?” 

His face contorts with confusion, before a small smile rests across his lips as he remembers you’ve had quite a lot to drink. “Are you sure we should be sharing secrets right now?” he asks, although his curiosity is piqued. 

“What’s the harm?” you answer, now grinning. 

“Alright. What’s the secret?” 

You look around dramatically, as if you’re making sure nobody else is there. You then lean in close and whisper. “I have horrible stage fright.” You then lean back, still smiling. “All of my confidence is fake.” 

He stares at you for a moment before bursting out in laughter. “You’re pulling my leg, surely. I haven’t seen an ounce of nervousness in you since I met you.”

“No, It’s true!” you exclaim. “Before every performance I’m practically shaking in my boots.” You tilt your head up to the sky. "Before you set foot on stage- it's all so terrifying. However, once you strum that first note- all that fear seems to melt away."

Gale nods in understanding, though his amusement doesn't fade. "So it's that split second before you begin your performance that gets to you? Before the music has even started and your mind still has time to get tangled up in a thousand different worries?" he asks. You nod. "Exactly. I get so caught up in the 'what ifs.' What if I mess up a note? What if they don't like my song?" You sigh a bit before continuing. "I'm afraid I'm not as confident as I seem."

A comfortable silence looms over the two of you as he takes in your words. His smile begins to fade as he reaches down to grab the bottle by his side. He takes a drink. “I suppose it’s my turn to share a secret.”  After a moment of hesitation he continues. “Sometimes…the weight of what I did holds me down. It makes me feel as though I am unable to breathe.” He tells you, his breath shaky. “Sometimes I find it hard to forgive myself.” 

You reach out and put your hand on his arm in a comforting manner. “We all make mistakes Gale-” 

He looks down at your hand, a painful smile stretching across his features. “I know.” He then lets out a soft chuckle.  “Perhaps I am being too hard on myself. I was young, and over confident in my abilities.” Still smiling, he looks back up at you. “When it comes to love, we don't always act in the most rational manner… It’s only later, when everything is all over, that we regret it. I’m sure you understand.” 

You grimace a bit and shake your head. “I.. actually wouldn’t know.” you mumble, heat spreading across your cheeks in shame. “I’ve never been in a relationship.” 

Gale’s eyes widen. “No relationship?” he asks, seemingly surprised. "With a charming and beautiful face like yours, I would have thought that romance would be coming your way left and right." Your cheeks grow warmer at the compliment. He tilts his head back slightly with a curious look "I won't pry if you don't want me to, but I am curious as to why you have never been in a relationship before."

You bite your lip nervously before saying. "I...suppose my music has always been my main concern. I always thought that I had to master my craft, and love would come later. I never gave myself time for relationships- but I regret it all now." you admit with a solemn expression. "I have never even kissed someone."

Gale stares at you in surprise. “Ah, I see.” 

He clears his throat, an  encouraging smile spreading across his lips. “Well, there’s no need to panic. I'm certain that there’s someone out there that would give up the stars and moon just to kiss you” he tells you leaning in a bit closer.

“You think so?”

“I know so.” 

His reassurance, although kind, doesn’t seem to ease your sour mood. He leans a bit closer, his cheeks rosy from the wine. “If it’s really bothering you that much, maybe…maybe I could give you your first kiss.” He offers, his voice barely above a whisper. 

Your expression morphs into one of surprise, cheeks now on fire. “You would do that?” You ask, your heart beating faster than it ever has before (somehow faster than it does in the heat of battle even). He smiles. A sweet, comforting smile. 

“It would be an honor.” He’s so close you can feel his breath on your face. 

You think it over for a second. Perhaps swayed by the alcohol, or the moonlight shining down on his face, you find yourself wanting this more than anything else. You turn your body completely towards him. “Alright…I…I’m going to kiss you then.” you stumble over your words. Gale smiles, waiting for you to take the first step. Nervous, and a little insecure  you purse your lips and move closer. Finally, you softly press your lips against his. 

Gale’s lips meet yours, warm and gentle. His hand rests on your waist, softly urging you to move closer. Your body complies, and the kiss deepens. It’s a rather clumsy moment, and you are completely unsure of what to do. Still, it’s electrifying.  

You pull away, letting out a nervous exhale. “Was that okay?” 

Gale smiles tenderly at you. “It was wonderful,” he says. “Perfect in fact.” He presses his lips against your forehead, before pulling away. “Now, you’ve had your first kiss. There’s no need to worry anymore.” he mumbles, an unreadable emotion in his eyes. 

“Thank you.”

He nods and pushes himself off the log. “Alright. How about we go join everyone else again?” he holds his hand out to you and helps you to your feet. You stay standing there for a moment, hand in his, staring up at him. He squeezes your hand, then lets it drop. Turning around to make his way back to the camp.

You stay frozen. Happy that you waited for this moment to have your first kiss, and scared about what this means for the future. 

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Unexpected 48

Warnings: non/dubcon, pregnancy, pegging, Lloyd being the worst, post partum, csection, suicidial ideation, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

You calm the baby as your own tears dry up. She doesn’t deserve misery even if you’re cursed with it. Maybe that’s what you should try, to save her from the same. If you can.

You get her to sleep at last and fall back onto the bed, weak with cheeks like crepe paper from crying. You stare at the ceiling as the window darkens as the night approaches. You knew deep down Lloyd wouldn’t be gone forever but that eventuality could never prepare you for his return.

Your eyes drift closed as you lay sideways on the mattress, too lazy to drag yourself up to the pillows. How pathetic are you. Feeling sorry for yourself because the obvious happened. Because that scum ran off like the cowardly dog he is. You knew from the moment you met him who he was so you can't pretend to be surprised.

There’s a tap on the door. You tense but your sense keeps you from panicking. It’s too gentle to be that jackass. You know he doesn’t have much in that thick skull of his but you hope he knows better than to try anything tonight.

“Sweetheart,” Harlan’s voice seeps through the door like molasses, “if you’re asleep, don’t worry, I just wanted to check in.”

You swallow and sit up. You prefer him to his wife or son. There’s a twinge in your chest as you realise you missed him. Of anyone, he’s been your only true companion. Not some erstwhile comfort or momentary escape.

You get up and open the door. The tall man stoops just below the lintel, his thick white facial hair catching your attention. Everything happened so fast, you hadn’t noticed it. His usually clean shaven face is slightly haggard with his exhaustion.

“Hey,” you greet him in a half-whisper, the quiet of the house makes even that seem loud, “wanna come in?”

“Sure,” he accepts and ducks inside as you hold the door. You shut it behind him as he smooths his grown out locks and peers around with a bashful posture. 

You come around him and stop by the bassinet, looking in at the dozing infant. You put your hand on the canopy and lift your chin, “you wanna see her?”

He hesitates, reaching to rub his neck, “I came to see to you first,” he intones, “I can’t imagine it’s been easy.”

“Me?” You scoff, “you don’t have to lie. You can hold her, she’ll just fall back asleep,” you move to reach into the bassinet and he nears, putting his hand out but not touching you.

“No, I mean it, I’m not gonna ask how you are ‘cause I know. But you’re my daughter and I wasn’t out there for just that bastard. I didn’t run halfway across the god– across the world for that moron,” he sniffs, “come on, let her sleep.” He pauses and glances down, lips curling slightly at the sight of his granddaughter, “she’s even more beautiful than I recall.”

He waves you away from her and you sit on the edge of the bed. You sit in silence as you watch his lingering gaze on the baby. Maybe, if he can look at her with that much love…

“You got questions, I’ll answer them,” he moves away from the bassinet as he sits beside you, “and if you don’t wanna talk about him, fair enough.”

You nod and look at the floor. You don’t know what you want. It doesn't really matter where he was. It matters that he left and that he stayed away. He confirmed every doubt you carried for nine months.

“Not about him,” you shake your head, feeling the sting return to the brim of your eyes, “but… did you mean it?”

“Did I mean what?”

“You called me your daughter,” you look at him meekly, “is that really what you believe?”

“'Course,” he snorts, “Dottie may’ve never given me a girl but the world did and they did a good job.”

Your cheek pinch and you fight back tears, “I don’t think you’d want me to be your daughter if you knew.”

“If I knew what?” He watches you, no judgment, no expectation. If you don’t tell him, you know he won’t ask again.

You hang your head and cross your arms. You close your eyes as you pick out the words, “I… found someone else. Just… just to waste the time. I wasn’t going to wait any longer for him.”

He hums and takes a long breath, “well, I know now and I don’t feel any different.”

You clamp your lips together and you glance at the bassinet. You hear the baby babble. You shudder and let your hands fall into your lap.

“There’s something else.”

“There is.”

You sniff and cover your face. You don’t know if you can say it out loud. It keeps you awake at night, it eats you alive, and it wakes you every day with a wail.

“The baby…” you slide your hands away from your face, “I’m trying… so hard.”

“She’s healthy, you’re doing good, sweetheart,” he says.

“No, no, you don’t–” you nearly choke as a lump rises to your throat, “I can’t love her. I try and I try and I can’t. I can’t even say her name.”

He nods and chews on your confession. You won’t look at him. You can’t face his disappointment. You can’t bear to see in him the same hatred you feel for yourself.

He startles you as he reaches over and puts his large hand over yours. He pulls it away from your lap and sidles closer on the bed. He holds your hand tight and leans his arm against yours.

“The only thing that upsets me about that is you lying,” he says, “because if you didn’t love that little girl, you wouldn’t be so worried about not.”

Your lip temples as you stare at the wall. No, he doesn’t understand. He can’t.

“I don’t… I can’t feel it–”

“You’ve been surviving and you done that for her as much as yourself,” he lets go of your hand and lifts his arm up onto your shoulders, “you ain’t got the chance to feel. Now you do, sweetheart.” He draws you into an embrace, “you don’t gotta take care of no one but you. I’ll deal with that brat I raised.”

You sniffle as your tears well over. You can’t stymie the flow once it starts. Harlan rests his chin lightly on your head as you curl into his shoulder and sob quietly, clinging to the front of his shirt. As your knuckles press against his ribs, he winces and lets out a wheeze.

You flinch but he doesn’t let you go, keeping you close.

“Harlan,” you croak, “you’re hurt?”

“I’m just fine,” he assures you as he rubs your back, “let me tell you, I dealt Marion a worse blow.”

You laugh through your tears at the thought of it, “did you really?”

“A nice one square in the chops just for you,” he avows, “another across his big dumb nose for baby Luna, too.” 

Your lips tug at the image playing in your head and the snipe about Lloyd’s nose, the most defining feature he shares with his father. You don’t know if Harlan meant to be funny but you it eases the weight in your chest. You gently pull away and look up at your father.

“Will you hold Luna?” You ask as you wipe your nose with the back of your hand, “she’s missed you so much.”

[jinghengology]

something i find really interesting about the hcq companion quest is that, because its framed from dan heng’s pov, the player gets to essentially “act out” his inner turmoil concerning his feelings about dan feng’s past. with almost every other character and at most points of dialogue, you have the option to choose whether he has a connection to the fragmented memories that still leaves him torn, or you can choose to feel little at all and gravitate towards moving forward.

the only times the player doesn’t get a choice revolve around jing yuan.

at the beginning of the quest, dh decides to solely seek out jy for information about the stellaron hunters (and refuses to talk to anyone else depending on the dialogue chosen by the player) when he likely could have spoken to fu xuan as well. but what’s even more interesting is the ending, in which dan heng asks him “should i be responsible for dan feng’s actions?” with no other options.

it’s a really vulnerable moment as this is the focal question of the entire quest; it’s not the type of question you could ask to just anyone. this makes it clear that dan heng implicitly trusts jing yuan, is slowly opening up to being able to rely on him, and really values his opinion in this whole ordeal due to how consistently jy has shown that he accepts and desires to protect dan heng’s autonomy AS dan heng, one of the very few people in canon with true knowledge of the sedition who’s done so.

and it’s even more interesting because, at this point, jing yuan has been very clear where he stands on dan heng’s situation; dh knows that jy doesn’t consider him to be the same person as dan feng, and that jy is literally the very reason why he’s no longer legally banished from the luofu. dan heng is also implied to be the only reason jing yuan agreed to jingliu’s request in the first place. so dan heng knows that jing yuan is supportive, so it’s likely that he really just wanted reassurance from someone that the path he chooses (whatever that may be) is the right choice. and jing yuan gives him just that by once again affirming his autonomy as a person and reminding him that his life is his own choice and that he can (and should) do what he wants with it, while even working behind the scenes to help clear his name on the luofu with little regard to his own reputation.

to finally be able to ask something like this after 700 years of holding his past close to his chest and never letting anyone in, never having anyone he COULD let in from not feeling safe enough, must have been such a cathartic experience despite all the conflicting emotions dan heng likely felt after everything.

there’s just so much TRUST between these two it makes me ill and nauseous and ill

[tired-and-ticklish]

The Dangers Of Bows

Disclaimer: This is a tickle fic, so if that isn’t your thing, then just ignore this. 

Summary: Angel Dust likes pulling pranks. He really should have thought about his plan to prank Alastor a bit more thoroughly.

TW: Tickling (maybe a bit intense?), Restraints, Swearing, Mentions of Cannibalism, Angel Dust being Angel Dust.

Inspiration: This video

In Angel Dust’s defense, he thought it wouldn’t work.

In Angel’s defense, he thought someone would have stopped him.

In Angel’s defense, he thought Alastor would have noticed sooner.

In his defense, he had not expected the Overlord to be that distracted when talking with Rosie. The Cannibal Overlord had come to the hotel to get a good look at the new ‘business venture’ the Radio Demon had taken interest in. Apparently, talking to her put Alastor in such a good mood, he almost forgot where he was for a moment, and thus, didn’t feel the spider demon tie a bow around his tail.

Angel hadn’t even been aware Alastor even had a tail, until Niffty mentioned it off-handedly one day. That gave the spider an idea for a small prank, just a small one. Alastor also liked pranks, sure, but Angel didn’t want to end up double dead. Despite what people may think, he isn’t that stupid.

Or maybe he is, considering he went through with the prank, even though most of his instincts told him it was a terrible idea. He had waited until one of the rare days Alastor wasn’t wearing his trademark coat, and thus, his little deer tail was on full display. The Radio Demon only did this in the presence of Rosie, considering they had been friends for who knows how long.

“Certainly not as long as me and Al’!” Mimzy had said once.

The spider demon had honestly thought Alastor would have noticed his presence sooner, or caught onto Angel’s plans quicker. Hell, he was pretty sure Rosie had even seen him sneaking up on the deer, and yet, she didn’t say anything. Maybe she was curious as to how this would all turn out.

What Angel failed to remember was Alastor’s own shadow, which was almost like having a second Radio Demon. As soon as the bow was tied on, the spider let out a startled noise as Alastor’s shadow grabbed him, pulling him down and restraining Angel to the floor.

“My, you must have a double-death wish.” Alastor said calmly, looking over to the pinned pornstar. “Sneaking up on me while I’m having a conversation with an old friend?”

Angel let out a nervous chuckle. “Alright, you caught me Al.” He said, holding his hands up placatingly. “Dumbass move on my part, I know-”

“He tied a bow to your tail.” Rosie interrupted, casually sipping the tea Charlie had made.

Slowly, Alastor turned his head around to check if what his companion was saying was true. Angel had forgotten that the Radio Demon could turn his head like an owl, it being completely turned as he looked at his own tail. Sure enough, there was a bright pink, sparkly bow tied to the deer tail. Alastor’s head snapped back toward Angel’s direction, the pornstar instantly filled with dread.

“And you didn’t think to warn me beforehand?” He asked Rosie, incredulous.

“I think it’s cute~” She teased.

“A-Al, we can talk about this, r-right?” Angel pleaded, trying to crawl away. “I-It’s just a little joke, you know?”

Alastor seemed to consider this, scratching his chin in thought. “Well, my arachnid acquaintance, if you desired a laugh, you simply needed to ask.”

Before Angel could question what the Radio Demon meant, he saw it. The mischievous glint in Alastor’s eyes as he kneeled by the trapped spider. His shadow yoinked Angel’s arms upward, giving the deer easy access to his worst spots. Angel’s eyes widened, shaking his head frantically.

“W-Wait wait wait! Y-You don’t have to do this Al!” The nervous smile was already starting to form on his face.

“Do what~?” Alastor asked, before poking the spider’s sides. “I’m not doing anything.”

Angel bit his lip, trying to twist and turn away from the Radio Demon’s hands. It was useless, of course, as Alastor’s shadow held the spider firmly in place. The deer poked and prodded at Angel’s sides, his claws slowly, torturously tracing over the spot.

“Ah ah ah.” Alastor tutted when he noticed the spider biting his lip. “Why are you resisting now? You wanted a laugh, so I’m giving you one!”

“A-Ahahahal Ahahal I’m sohhohohorry! I-Ihihihih’ll lehehheeave yoohohohu aloohohohone!” Angel pleaded.

“You should have thought about that before, Angel.” Alastor chuckled.

Rather than go right for the spider’s worst spot, the Radio Demon decided to go for his own personal favorite spot: the ribs. He started at the top, just close enough to Angel’s armpits to get him nervous, before slowly dragging his claws down, tickling each rib with feather-like touches that made Angel lose it.

“S-Smihihihihles plehehehehease!”

“Sorry Angel.” Alastor said, not at all apologetic. “I am a cannibal, I just have to go for your ribs!”

Angel was about to let out another protest or plea, when he squealed as he felt a second set of hands tickling his stomach. He was regretting his decision to wear a crop top that day. Alastor raised an eyebrow, looking over and spying Rosie, who had her own grin.

“Oh Alastor, don’t you know the best part is the stomach?” Rosie asked, digging her nails into the spider’s fluffy belly.

“Really? Again with this discussion, Rosie?” Alastor asked, amused. “Ribs are the far superior meal.”

“Oh please, just look at how soft and tender the stomach is!”

Angel was losing his mind! Both Overlords were tickling him and acting like he wasn’t even there! He sputtered as he felt the Cannibal Overlord drag a finger slowly up the pink streak on his stomach.

“See? This one even comes with his own outline for where we could cut! Just open up this sensitive little belly~”

“Please, he’s so thin, I highly doubt his stomach would be of any value.”

Honestly, most people would be panicking from two cannibals talking about eating them or cutting open their stomach, but Angel knew that if Alastor really wanted to eat him, he wouldn’t bother with tickling him first. That just wasn’t who Al was, he wasn’t someone to give his victims comfort before eating them.

What Angel was panicking about was how close Rosie’s finger was getting to where his belly button would be. Before he could even attempt to beg, she dug right in.

“SHHIHIHIHIT SHIHIHIHIT!”

“See, Alastor? Listen to those little squeals!” Rosie teased.

Alastor let out his own amused chuckle. “Surely you’re joking. I think he’ll scream louder if I do this~”

Without warning, Alastor’s claws dig right into the top of the spider’s ribs, making him howl with laughter. Angel tried to squirm away, pull his arms down, anything to try to block out the sensations, but the Radio Demon’s shadow held firm. All the spider could do was kick his legs out, the only part of him not restrained currently.

“P-PLEHEHEHEASE PLHEHEHEASE IHIHIHIH’M SOHOHOHOHOHRRY!”

“You know, Angel, it’s rather rude to interrupt a conversation.” Alastor hummed. “Did no one teach you any manners?”

“Guess we’ll have to help him with that~” Rosie teased.

She ceased her tickling, allowing Angel to slightly catch his breath, still laughing as Alastor’s hands stayed at his ribs. The pornstar then felt Rosie hold onto his waist, his eyes widening as he realized what she was about to do. He pleaded, shaking his head as Rosie lowered her own toward his stomach.

“W-Wahahahit wahhahait dohohoohn’t!”

Angel’s pleas fell on deaf ears as Rosie blew a raspberry right into his stomach, making him squeal so loud, Alastor thought the whole hotel might hear. The Radio Demon hummed, deciding to show a little bit of mercy and cease tickling Angel’s ribs, allowing the pornstar to only focus on Rosie’s torment.

“I wonder if Husker knows about this little weakness of yours, Angel?” Alastor teased, humming a bit. “A few little raspberries and you’re practically a mess!”

Angel couldn’t help but blush as Alastor said that. The idea of Husk finding out how well raspberries worked on him making the spider both terrified and excited. He kind of hoped Alastor would tell the bartender, it’d save Angel the embarrassment of telling Husk himself. He was pulled out of those thoughts by another raspberry, and a few nibbles to his stomach.

As both Overlords noticed Angel’s laughter start to sound desperate, Rosie stopped her onslaught. Alastor snapped his fingers, his shadow releasing it’s hold, allowing the spider to curl up on himself, rubbing the spots where a few phantom tickles lingered.

“I do hope this goes without saying.” Alastor said, leaning near Angel’s face. “But I trust Rosie’s visit won’t be interrupted anymore?”

“Y-Yeah, yeah, no more interruptions.” Angel said, catching his breath.

“Delightful!” Alastor said, before getting up and dusting himself off. He held out a hand to help Rosie up.

“Aww, don’t be too upset Alastor.” Rosie hummed, taking Alastor’s hand. “He’s such a cute little thing! No wonder Husker likes him~” She teased, leaning down and pinching Angel’s cheek slightly.

‘Little thing’ was ironic, considering Angel was the tallest person in the hotel. The way Rosie complimented/teased him was… weird, but nice. Like a mother or aunt teasing you about your crush. While Angel pushed himself up, Alastor snapped his fingers, the bow the spider tied around his tail now on said spider’s head.

“Pink isn’t really my color.” Alastor hummed.

“Were you more mad about the color than anything?” Angel asked, not putting it past the Radio Demon.

Alastor chuckled. “Not particularly. If it was blue like a certain Television, then, well, I wouldn’t have been as kind.” He said with a threatening grin.

Message heard, loud and clear. Don’t put anything blue on Alastor.

“Now then!” The Radio Demon said, turning to the Cannibal Overlord, holding out his arm for her “All of this has left me famished, shall we head out for a bite?”

“Oooh, you read my mind.” Rosie said, her smile full of teeth as she hooked her arm around Alastor’s, allowing the deer to lead her out of the hotel.

Alastor snapped his fingers one more time, his coat materializing onto him and covering his tail once more.

[karniss-bg3]

I figured you’d be the right person to ask this question, why is Kar’niss’ skin super pale when he was originally a drow? 🖤

I had the same question myself and I did some digging a bit ago. All of the official drider concept art I've seen has depicted driders with dark skin, so it stands to reason that the transformation alone wouldn't be enough to alter his appearance. This leaves one interesting theory at play; Kar'niss was a Szarkai.

Szarkai, which translates to "ghost spiders", are albino drow. This is a very rare mutation that affects only 0.1% of the drow population. Their skin tones are so light in fact that they are able to pass as surface elves with little trouble. Some would think that this would make them outcasts but in fact Szarkai were viewed as a blessing of Lolth, hence their namesake.

There are some interesting crossover traits between Kar'niss and Szarkai that lean me more toward this theory, such as: -Szarkai look almost identical to drow outside of the skin tone. However, they have also been known to have minor deformities. The most notable is "gnarled and claw-like hands" which we know Kar'niss to possess. Originally I thought this was due to the transformation, but now I think he may have had it prior to the change.

-They are very adverse toward combat, preferring to let others do the dirty work so to speak. When the player engages Kar'niss in a fight one of the first things he does after his multi-attack is cast sanctuary on himself, protecting himself from harm and forcing his companions to take the hits. I also saw a video where someone cast banish on Kar'niss and when he returned he disengaged, healed himself, and ran from the fight. Now this was likely a bug, but it'd be on brand for Szarkai's desire to escape a fight rather than engage in it.

-They were mostly used as spies and gathering information since they could easily blend into surface societies. While there isn't much evidence that Kar'niss has much training in this field, what stuck out to me was the professions Szarkai favored. One of them is bard, and we have at least some notion that Kar'niss is linked to one musical instrument by way of the spider's lyre. I recall someone commenting asking if the lyre may have belonged to Kar'niss at one point and while I can't say with certainty, if it was and Minthara was merely holding on to it then it'd lend credence to him being a bard formerly. That and he's super pissed if you play it poorly!

-I haven't done a playthrough with Minthara in my party so I am not familiar with all of her dialogue lines. However, she does know Kar'niss in some capacity and the lyre is used to call him. Her last name is Baenre which is one of the most notable drow houses in all of Menzoberranzan, famous for Jarlaxle the leader of Bregan D'aerthe. I say this because Szarkai seemed to be far more common in noble houses, which Baenre would be. This could, even if loosely, establish a link between them.

IF this is true, that puts a very intense spin on Kar'niss' potential history. Szarkai were protected, considered valuable, and their existence kept secret. They were removed from drow life, and even kept in far safer conditions than others. This didn't mean they were shielded from the cruelty drow are known for but it was a different kind of cruelty. Often trained from a very young age to be spies and saboteurs, and subsequently being shipped to human cities to do as ordered. It makes me wonder what Kar'niss could've done to incur Lolth's wrath to the extent she warped him into a drider. Betrayal? Failure? Weakness? Or perhaps Lolth just really wanted an alabaster pet, it's hard to say.

Thanks for the ask!

[amica-aenigmata-naboo]

I See You

Astarion x Y/N - drabble - 1K WC

Masterlist

Warnings: gorgon reader, self doubt, Astarion being a soft boi

---------------------------

You always had your cowl on. It covered your eyes and all of your hair, it was one of the first things Astarion noticed about you when you started traveling together. You had rejected all of his physical advantages and when he confessed he actually felt something for you, you were honestly quite shocked. You had tried your best to keep your new companions at arm's length. They were sweet people, you wanted to protect them. You liked Astarion too, and begrudgingly you admitted that to him. He was elated, as were you. You liked that he was slow to touch. He only ever touched your hands. He tried to hold your face once, but when he saw you move away from him he only smiled understandingly. He never pushed you. But as of late you could sense a question building up inside him. You became a bit reserved, fearing the worst. 

“Darling…” Astarion called into your tent.

You scrambled to flip your hood up “Yes?” you said as you slipped your glasses on. 

He slipped inside, the soft orange glow of candles tinting his skin. “I… Can we talk?” 

You nodded, the lump in your throat would give you away if you spoke. 

He sat on the floor with you, random pillows and blankets strewn about creating a comfortable environment. “I just wanted to ask you a few questions… and please know I am not trying to be rude when I ask them…” his voice was gentle, you could feel his sincerity.

Your tense muscles eased a bit, “Alright.” you said kindly.

“Your hood… it hides a lot of you… May I inquire as to why?” he said as he rubbed his thumb over your knuckles, holding your hand. 

You froze for a moment. In all honesty, you knew you could only live in blissful denial for so long. You knew this day would come and you would have to reveal your true self to him. You let out a shaky sigh before answering “It’s because of what I am.” you said flatly.

“What do you mean?” he questioned, you could hear his confusion. 

“I’m… I’m a gorgon.” you whispered.

“Pardon?” he asked, a bit of disbelief in his tone. 

You slowly pulled your hood off. Snakes of all shapes and sizes tousled about, finally free of their cage. You kept your sunglasses on but your eyes remained glued to the floor. The tent was so quiet, all you could hear was the wriggle and hisses of your snakes. 

You felt his finger tilt your chin upwards. “My sweet, is that all? Were you afraid I would think differently of you?” 

“Do you know what gorgons can do?” you asked, and eyebrow raising.

“If I’m honest, I’m not extraordinarily well versed in the creatures of the far realms. I’ve heard of gorgons but nothing specific comes to mind.” his cheeks would have tinged with blush if they could.

“We aren’t creatures… we are monsters. Hideous and… cursed.” you curled into yourself, pulling your knees to your chest. 

“How so?” he asked with a slight scoff. You were amazing, a monster is the last thing you could be. 

“Our eyes… they turn the living to stone. Statues frozen in fear for eternity.” a tear slipped down your face. 

Astarion moved his hand up to your face slowly. Your mind screamed at you to move back but you didn’t. He held your face, wiping the tears away. He took your glasses off in a swift motion. You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to feel for your glasses with your hand. 

“Sneak a peek…” his lips whispered next to your ear.

“I can’t…” you responded, a shiver running down your spine from his comment.

“Trust me.” he kissed over your jaw before nipping your lip and kissing you.  

“Astarion please…” you whimpered out.

“Trust me.” he repeated as he kissed just below your eyes.

You cracked them open ever so carefully, just barely letting light hit your eyes. You caught a glimpse of him before you squeezed them shut. “I don’t want to scare you…” 

A soft chuckle seeped out of Astarion, “Little love, there is nothing to be afraid of.” he assured you. 

He held you close, you felt safe. You wanted nothing more than to relent but how could you? If he became stone you could never forgive yourself. He was your first friend, your first lover. You can’t, and yet you feel yourself open your eyes. Tears slipped down your cheeks as your snake-like eyes adjusted to the sudden light. You focused on Astarion. Wow. He was beautiful; time stood still as you two gazed at each other. Every detail of him burned into your brain. This was the first time you two could truly see each other. The air between you was thick with tension. He moved first, crashing his lips onto yours. The kiss softened immediately, a delicate waltz between the two of you. Every fiber of your being was consumed by him. You pulled away, gasping for air while you held his face in your hands. 

“I see you…” he whispered against your lips.

“You’re not afraid? Not… disgusted?” you asked, your voice wobbled. 

Astarion tiled your chin up, your eyes met his. Red like garnet. Sharp, yet soft. “Never.” he said as he kissed your cheek.

You cracked a small smile “Why aren’t you stone?” you wondered aloud as you caressed his face, kissing his neck lovingly. 

“You turn the living to stone.” he repeated what you had told him.

It clicked suddenly, “You’re… undead.” you said aloud, piecing things together.

“Can’t get anything past you.” Astarion teased.

You chuckled at him, one of your smaller snakes landing a playful nip on the arch of his cheek. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner…” you whispered, looking away from him.

“You weren’t ready, I can understand that better than most darling.” He said pulling you close to lay against him. 

You hummed in agreement, “We should sleep…” you yawned as you snuggled into him further, pulling a blanket over you both. 

“Goodnight my love…” he whispered against your forehead, long after he felt your breaths even out and your body relax completely with his.

“Love… you..” you mumbled almost inaudibly as you adjusted your position half asleep. 

Astarion’s heart flipped at your words, he kissed your head before finally slipping into slumber himself.

--------------------

Naboo's Note:

Hello everyone! So sorry this took forever to get out. Life and work and mental health have all been pretty overwhelming lately. I'm gonna try to write more soon, but I hope this is good until then. As always, thank you for the likes, comments, reblogs, and requests. TTYLXOXO ILYSM <3

[sapphicrow]

The choices for the side enemies in each section of resident evil was very deliberate, and shows off both what Mother Miranda thought the lords deserved and what suits their characters. This may have been for difficulty purposes for each area, but still. I think it is a nice tidbit of flavor to our characters even if it’s indirect. Also I have brain rot.

Moreau doesn’t have any mobs. His reservoir is uniquely isolated. It’s evident from the way the other lords treat him that this is how they feel towards him as well. He isn’t a popular fella. As such, Mother Miranda granted him no special protection or privileges. Besides, I’m sure his bile would repel any creature, even a zombie or moroaica.

Lady Dimitrescu has many creatures within her castle because she interacts with more people on the regular. It’s canon that she had a whole service of female servants who were regularly harvested and experimented on. These subjects are later turned into one of two things: moroaica (the on ground creepy crawlies), or samca (the harpy looking things on the roof). Though we know Alcina isn’t Miranda’s favorite, she’s still pretty high up there. She had to make these critters herself still. Plus, her castle is huge and it only makes sense to have scattered security. I’d say Alcina’s daughters count as a high honor and another reflection of the characterization of Castle Dimitrescu.

As for Lady Beneviento, her situation is an interesting one. Angie doesn’t quite count as a mob, since she is technically an extension of Donna’s consciousness. This is obviously part of her as a person. Disregarding Angie, Donna has no major creatures. I say this because I don’t believe her dolls count as beasts bestowed upon her by Miranda. They’re handmade. She had to harness the skills of cadou experimentation, combined with the craftsmanship of doll making. This reflects Donna because she is isolated, but skillful enough to combat it unlike Moreau. She’s delusional, but evidently not to the same degree as Sal. She copes in her own fucked up, crafty way.

Last but not least, Heisenberg. Now, Heisenberg is Mother Miranda’s established favorite. The golden child. The sun of her sons. It’s also established that Mother’s fondness is by no means requited. Heisenberg loathes her. But nonetheless, even with his absolutely meh loyalty, he has a fair deal of power bestowed upon him. Disregarding his cadou abilities, he has the entirety of the lycan pack. That is no small force. Miranda practically trusts the most dangerous lord with an army. I’d like to believe she isn’t stupid enough not to realize his faulty loyalty, but I feel as if she treats him like a second true child. He’s the son that could’ve been Eva’s big brother should everything have worked out. Love is blind, and Miranda’s too busy to question cutie Karl. Karl also has the Soldats that he’s made himself. This is an intriguing view of him in my opinion. Karl lets Ethan slaughter Miranda’s creation because the entire time he’s been using the powers she gave him to oppose her. Silly guy moment.

Mother Miranda herself has no side mob which is very purposeful as well. She works alone. Her sidekick is the cadou, which we see in the form of all those root looking appendages bursting forth from the ground later in the game. Unlike Moreau who’s isolated due to his insufferable and odorous nature, Miranda is alone by choice. By grief, more accurately. Why bother with companions when Eva isn’t back yet? For her shattered mindset, I’m sure the thought of her daughter is companionship enough. Even with the mold making an appearance, Ethan only has to engage in combat with her herself. This is because even with the mold present, she’s still the vessel. It’s illogical and unnecessary for the megamycete to risk itself when Miranda is right there and so willing to take the blunt of the force.

The megamycete’s side mob is every single thing infected with the mold.

Thank you for reading :) hope it was coherent