#there’s a second half to this I need to transcribe in full and I have a few other wrestler profiles to do

[razor-ramons-thighs]

Crush

Transcript under readmore to save space

Weight: 315 lbs

From: Kona Coast, HI

Birthday: January 31

Trademark finisher: Cranium Crunch

Known for: Being a nice guy away from the ring and tough in it 

Favorite quote: “Shakka, brahh!”

Titles held: None as of press time

Future ambition: “To crush the competition in the ring.”

[capslocked]

PARITY

male reader x sana & miyeon

21k words

Within some reasonable tolerance, the two are carbon copies. Six of one, half a dozen of the other.

Doppelganger, twin, deadringer - they always tell you, they don’t see it.

But when they stand together it always comes across like two shadows stitched into one silhouette; the slope of their noses, their mouths; the way their hair cascades down past their shoulders.

You’ve learned to recognize the twitch at the corner of their lips before a laugh - how they speak in the same inflection and pitch and tempo, the same cadence coloring all their syllables. Even in their figures there is something uncannily familiar: that petite stature, that grace; they both have perfect posture, an ingrained elegance, like something handed down generation to generation. And of course - the height. The hair. The eyes. The same-damned-smirk.

Here's a hypothetical: if Sana's DNA, then Miyeon's RNA. They're both two separate ways of reading the same thing, and they both have it in them to transcribe the same hot load of proteins over all their pretty faces.

"Oh, that's like a sex joke," Miyeon says to Sana, frowning slightly, "right?"

"I don't know." Sana hums. "Protein... like sperm?"

You sigh, rub your thumb at your temple. This is why, normally, you wouldn't take ditzy to bed, but there's all this history between you and Sana that proves otherwise. The dirty truth is: you’ve been taking ditzy to bed for years. And Miyeon’s right there. She’s all bright eyes, blonde hair, tiny little waist, the perfect height to get two fingers in her cunt and the rest of her in your lap without you even needing to shift your arm into something more uncomfortable. God forbid.

She pulls back the curtain of silk-glossed-hair spilling over her cheek and tucks it neatly behind her ear. Okay, fine. So maybe you really do have a type.

"Yeah," Miyeon decides. "I think that's a good pun. Cute."

She glances sideways at Sana; something flashes between them, imperceptible. They've been doing this sorta thing for a long time - long before they ended up in their current living arrangement. This machine of synchronized, unvoiced communication.

"Cute," echoes Sana, delighted, and she lets her eyes flick back to yours. "Baby, are you, like, gonna give us lots of protein?"

"First of all, we’re fast approaching the point of diminishing returns on the whole protein spermaestria," you muse, wryly. Sana beams. "And again, the point I’m trying to make, Sana: you two are identical."

"Not in spirit," says Miyeon, automatically. "Or intellect. Or appearance, either."

"You can't just claim that," says Sana, matter of fact. "He means physically. I have bigger tits and a better ass.”

There's no argument from your end. And not only because the cab driver hits a speed bump or a pothole or perhaps a small child way too quickly that sends you all lurching together into the seatbelts.

Miyeon finds a good hold in the handle over the door - it saves her - and you wind up steadying Sana. For a split second, it's both their shoulders leaning on yours: Sana, then Miyeon, then Sana. Back and forth. Back and forth. The three of you still end up sprawled halfway out of the seats and onto each other in the cramped cab, tangled all together.

"Please, explain it then," implores Sana, hushed slightly. "Go ahead, I'm sure Miyeon's dying to hear it."

"Look, it's not a perfect one to one mapping," you say, running your hand through your hair and putting on your patient professor-in-front-of-the-class face. "For example: Miyeon's cuter-"

"Thank you," chirps Miyeon, sweetly sardonic, before you can even append anything else to the statement. Sana’s already there with a noise of mild protest.

"I mean, I'm a full inch and a half taller than you."

"So?"

"That’s an unfair advantage. You've gotta be the dumbest person I know."

"Funny," chides Miyeon, swiveling her gaze onto Sana. "You could barely talk when we were fucking your brains out on your birthday. He's dating you, not me, remember? If anything, you're the one sporting an unfair advantage."

"Okay, well," Sana counters, reasonably, "when you can barely get a sentence out from choking on my boyfriend's cock, who the hell is supposed to call it?"

You ignore that. Miyeon is having more difficulty; her face has flushed cherry red and her hand's white-knuckle-gripping the side of the cab's passenger door. 

"For what it’s worth," you cut in, placidly, "I don’t think there’s any clear answer."

"Nonsense," they both reply, simultaneously and satisfied - like wind up toys. And that's the way the conversation tends to go when you get them alone like this. Identical, you pause to think again after spilling out from the back of the car and onto the curb outside the girls’ apartment.

All the things they say are word-for-word - they walk the same, eat the same, smile the same, tilt their heads the same. In those moments where you don't speak, it feels like watching some two-headed monster, an entity constructed from equal parts of both. And it isn't just the physicality at play. They've got that eerie ability to read each other, speak for each other. It's strange: their habits, the way their eyebrows arch, the set of their shoulders. It all syncs right up, matches seamlessly.

It's really fucking uncanny.

"Um." Sana twists one slim wrist back and forth until the key turns in the lock. "So, is it, like, wrong of me that I kinda just wanna skip the dinner part of this and watch my roommate get wrecked in the middle of our living room?"

"Depends," you answer, before you can let yourself dwell too much.

“Just a complete and utter carpet dive,” Sana says, shouldering the door open and flipping on the lights. “It’d serve her right. She’s being annoying.”

Miyeon scoffs, sticks out a bare, pale leg - it ends in a nail polished fire engine red, the strap of a stiletto sandal - and blocks your way inside. "Hey," she protests, lightly. You are not the only object in the equation - you are merely an item to be held against them; it's not about you, not in its most abstract shape. Miyeon and Sana are competing - vaguely for your affection, but more so just for affection in general. It's an ego thing, if nothing else.

"I'm an angel. I'm precious."

"Get your pretty feet out of his face," warns Sana.

"Ugh," says Miyeon. And then, "so short-tempered when you're not getting away with everything."

"Whatever, princess." Sana gestures, airy and flippant. "In any case: fuck off, or go get fucked."

This has become some kind of weird custom, admittedly. Miyeon does exactly as her best friend requests. She floats down the hallway and toward her room.

"Can't get good service around here anymore anyway," is what she tosses over her shoulder. Her fingers run up the door frame to her room and hang there, briefly, before she glances sideways back. You and Sana, now giving her your deservedly undivided attention. There is no split focus, no point of overlap. Her hair falls loose past her shoulders; her shirt clings a little to the muscles of her arms, her ribs. The point of contact between her skirt and her upper thighs. Those impossibly big eyes. She's gorgeous. You rarely ever let yourself forget that. There's something devastating about the set of her face, about how her body is absolutely fucking perfect, all curving lines and smooth planes - tits that fit right in your palm, the dip of her stomach, the pretty shape of her ass - she’s tiny, and in a way, that means you can do anything to her and manage to get away with it. She’ll let you. She’ll ask you to do it all again. 

"You two are more than welcome to follow along, if you feel so inclined,” Miyeon adds before she opens the door to her room, steps through, and lets it shut behind her.

"Yeah." Sana runs her tongue over her top lip, staring you straight in the eye. Her smile is slightly predatory, all sharp teeth. "If you’re so inclined."

-

(For anyone wondering about things like premise or backstory, here’s a useful memory:

Sana has a new roommate. They've been living together for two, three months. She's still not over the fact you didn’t ask her to move in, and you're still not ready for it. Your answer hasn’t changed. You like your apartment the way it is; the two of you need space; it's what the kids call cohabital parity and no, the ring's not in your wallet and it's not even bought yet; stop nagging me. It'll happen when it happens. 

Anyway,

It's one of those plainly beautiful evenings in early July or August - a weekend probably: the living room is bathed in the sort of low, radiant sunset that can go on forever, all of summer stretched out, leisure and sunshine. Sana had talked her way into getting you to take her somewhere highbrow and a little out of your budget. She can talk her way into just about anything; that's her brand, her bad habit, her good fortune.

"We're not going to be able to get our tickets," you're explaining into the loud blare of a hair dryer. And to paraphrase, "what the fuck is the point of making reservations if we’re going to be so reprehensively late?"

Sana's juggling the curling iron while fumbling with an eyelash curler and applying mascara and rearranging earrings all at the same time, and you think about reminding her, again, that it doesn't matter what she looks like if you never actually, you know, leave - but then the hair dryer switches off.

“Hey.” Sana ignores the concern and swivels to ask which earrings match which necklace - two pairs are laid across the countertop; they look exactly the same; you love her, desperately, but for the record, you've never been any good at telling jewelry apart. Neither the knowledge-set nor the motivation; she looks fucking gorgeous in everything regardless-

The front door clicks then, and Miyeon bursts through with the force of an entire hurricane - and promptly stops, dead. You forget what the hell she said, but the story was: she'd just gotten back from the worst date in her life. She's in tears, sobbing. It's a mess. She's a mess. You can't leave.

She falls right into Sana's arms. Then Sana throws a pointed, triumphant grin your way, and says to Miyeon - and you remember this, word for word, verbatim - "Aw, baby. Don't worry. Let us take care of you. We'll make you forget all about him, okay?"

This is the long and short of it: Miyeon arrives, in tears. You never make it to dinner and a show. And the night ends more or less how it started - with Miyeon still pretty much crying, but only because you two won't stop. With your fingers, your mouths. Sana knows what her tongue's doing; Miyeon is loud - and responsive. She's gorgeous too. She's so into it. She needs someone who is genuinely in love with her, who isn't going to try and push her around. You slip your cock into her and that's pretty much it, a different kind of curtain call; Miyeon gets Sana's thumb rolling at her clit and, yeah - she's fucking gone. She cums on your cock like she’s dying, like you’re killing her. It's as simple as that.

Now, there are several instances of which this is the case, in chronological order:

a.) The first time, in Sana's bed.

b.) The second time is in the back of Miyeon's hatchback. Tight fit for three people. It's a do-not-recommend.

c.) The third time, when they want to try blindfolding Miyeon while she rides your cock in the living room. The girl can't see shit, you break some IKEA furniture you can’t pronounce the name of, and the condom comes off during the whole process. There’s this unsettling, world-rocking possibility in which you get Miyeon fucking legitimately pregnant via oopsie-daisy. So, you and Sana wind up spooned up with Miyeon between you two and discuss the eventuality, should it arise - what you will all do in the future, the consequences, what Miyeon and Sana will say to Miyeon's and Sana's families - what the fuck you'll tell the rest of your friends, let alone the press - and then, deciding together: hey, well maybe this is actually a really bad idea.

d.) The fourth, fifth, sixth and every time after that where you realize that you're just gonna roll it all back and pretend like this is completely normal. Two's company, three's kind of a fever dream - but this is the platonic ideal of groupthink. It works. It just does; you know how to fit the pieces together now. How to read her body language: the one-two-one rhythm, Sana and Miyeon and then Miyeon-and-Sana; where their hands are, where they're moving; Miyeon's choked little sobs and the breathless gasps when your cock is deep inside her; all the unintelligible murmurs passing between the two of them that you can't understand - but none of them ever really matter. The important thing is that she's put her two front teeth in your left collarbone while you fuck into her slow and deliberate, in a way she can really feel. You cover Sana's mouth with your palm, your fingers pressed against the pulsing heat in her pussy, and you make them both cum over and over until they’re eyes are screwed shut and they’re counting stars.

That's about it. That's all the things.)

-

"I call it being spoiled for choice," Sana says, pausing only momentarily to decide in the mirror of Miyeon's makeup vanity whether or not to take off the bracelet on her wrist. 

The glint that strikes off the metal is gold in the bedroom lights, all warm yellow and sparkling silver. Sana narrows her fingers, pulls it off, on - like you've caught her trying on clothes, the latest fashion in a store front window. A stylistic consideration. It matches the rings on her third and fourth fingers. She decides that it suits her. 

"Lo and behold," Sana continues, "we have a real situation on our hands. In your hands. Whatever, you get my drift."

"Your cock," adds Miyeon, smiling like sunshine. She’s tracing you over your pants with her thumb, and she’s got her doe-eyed grin on, the one that promises something sugar-sweet, kneeling between your thighs at the edge of her bed - the slightest dishevel of her hair, kiss-swollen lips. God, what a picture. Her pupils flare when her fingers reach the top button of your pants. "And what's worse? I'm going to die if I can't have at least, you know. A couple minutes alone with it."

"You'd figure out a way to die either way," Sana muses. She leans backwards in Miyeon's desk chair, tugging idly at the hem of her skirt.

They're not usually dressed alike, and that's the weirdest part - Sana's never had Miyeon's particular taste for the tiny gauche dresses and white converse shoes and glossy nails, not unless it’s some matching outfit that she's being bullied into. Today's no different: the soft fabric of Miyeon's slip of dress barely stretches down to the line of her thigh. The hem starts just below the boundary of innocuous and everything else. She’d been hiking it up all evening. And the straps lay so thin across her shoulders that one little tug in the wrong spot would probably send it skidding all the way down to the floor.

That's the main thing on your mind when you get one in between your fingers.

Miyeon simply shoulders the other, rolling it down to hang loose, leaving the dress hanging off the gentle slope of her chest.

"Pretty," you say out loud.

"I know," she says, holding the grin.

She can make the world smile, it's infectious - and your gaze follows the path: from the blonde-shiny hair spilling over a collarbone, to the peeking line of her bra, to the flutter of the bottom of her dress at her hip. You catch the subtle lace trim, the little patterns embroidered into the waist, and decide her body's a gift - and wrapping it is something divine, something meant to be ripped right to shreds. If no one else is willing to volunteer, then it'll fall on you. Sure, sure, sure. You can be thanked later.

"Lose it," you request, quietly.

"Mr. Impatient," is what Sana sniffs out, scoffing. She's lounged back on the other side of Miyeon's makeup counter. Her heel taps away at empty air, bouncing off the end of her foot, that hot little fucking rhythm she's had going since her partner in crime got in your lap and kissed you right down into oblivion. "You want to get her naked and get inside of her, huh?"

"Is that not why you dragged me here?" you counter.

"Oh, don't put this on me." Her expression slides right into the mischievous smirk you're familiar with. Miyeon’s often sporting the same one.

"He wants to bend you over, princess," she tells Miyeon, and you hear the wistful sigh through her parted lips come out like permission. "Not that I can say I'd blame him. When's the last time you've taken cock again?"

"With him last week." She throws the response to Sana. They look, more than anyone, to be in sync in their one-upmanship.

"Hmm," says Sana, and she’s looking right at you. "Check how tight that dress fits over her hips, don't you just want to tear it right off of her?"

"He's not doing that," says Miyeon, but there's the lilting tease in her voice that signals precisely the opposite. She wants it: wants it like sugar and soda, salt water taffy; wants to be stripped like skin, bared to the bone. Her knees spread, just a little. "Not yet, anyway. Right now," she adds, hand fluttering towards the inside of her thigh, supplying touches right over the lace, "I want to suck his cock."

"Such a slut," Sana teases, tilting her head.

"You'll get yours," Miyeon insists, before pulling your cock out of your boxers with a small smile, curling her fingers around it, leaning forward. "God, this thing." She has the head under the palm of her other hand, and a wet-tipped promise on her lower lip.

You thread your hand into the hair aside Miyeon's temple, gentle and what will seem in a moment: paradoxically-tender. 

"Imagine what it'll do to your mascara when I fuck your mouth."

Miyeon licks her lips. You reckon she’s completely aware how it comes across - the wicked fantasy she is.

"I'm imagining what it'll do to you when she chokes," Sana retorts. 

“When he fills up my throat,” Miyeon says, hungry.

Sana sighs, sounding utterly wistful, and she fixes the same unrepentant look on you. "Poor Miyeon is just starved for cum tonight. Aww," she remarks, sweetly, "The poor thing. Do me a favor won't you? Fuck my pretty little friend in the face."

"Well," is all you get out before you look up at Sana. "Yours too, honey."

"Hardly, the same," Miyeon cuts in primly, glancing sideways at Sana. There is some snobbishness implied; there are ways Sana and Miyeon have always found to subtly measure themselves against one another, to best each other - all of these ridiculous acts and anecdotes. Like their voices aren’t replicas of one another - and in constant disagreement over whoever is currently claiming to be the original.

Miyeon prissily tilts her jaw up. "Your ego might actually be the worst part about you, Sana. That and your tits."

"Guess he just loves all the worst parts," Sana quips, rolling her eyes, "and every time you call it into question I fall in love with him a little more."

She's got one foot up now on the seat of the chair and she's running her fingers, delicate and teasing, around the press of her panties. It's not a voyeuristic thing, she's told you, it's less about watching Miyeon get fucked than it is about knowing exactly what it looks like when she herself gets spread out beneath you. She watches you and Miyeon, she watches her best friend and you, and she touches herself and it's perfect. There's a few seconds, long and warm, before she lifts her fingers away, then sucks them into her mouth with a grin. Just the slightest taste.

"But seriously," she says to Miyeon. "If you're gonna do something - then do it. Don't be a tease. We both know the answer, anyway."

Miyeon swallows. You hear her. You watch her lips wrap around the head of your cock and pop off, wet and shining, and her head rests in the curve of your palm.

"I’m working on it," Miyeon allows, lowly - she pumps her fist again around you, careful with the motion; this little twisting tug. "Fuck, it's not even the fact that it's fucking huge, or. Like, it’s not because I’m dying to get stuffed by this, or because I’m sitting here thinking: oh my fuck, I’m gonna feel so full with this thing inside me."

You have her hand under her chin, thumb stroking gently against her cheek. Her eyes return to yours when you put a little more pressure in your grip. She’s fantastically pretty, and the gleam of lust and want in her irises has you probably too eager to play along. 

“So then, what could it possibly be?”

"It's-" Her cheeks darken pink beneath her blush, stumbling through a mouthful of ums and uhs as her eyes make tiny departures back to your waist until she finally gives up and just stares again.

Sana sits up a little in her chair.

"Look, this is the prettiest cock I've ever seen.” 

You and Sana almost snort in unison.

“I’m serious.” Miyeon rubs a semi-circle over the head with her thumb, glancing up at you beneath her mascara, and then to the base, back up. It jerks, almost like reflex, in her grasp; she huffs in delight. "It’s, like, perfect in every way. And, god, everytime- I’d just about do anything to feel it inside me."

“You’d beg?” Sana asks, eyebrow raised.

“I’m about to get down on my knees and grovel, honey.”

"Should've just said," Sana laughs - Miyeon chews her lip, half-exasperated, and drops a kiss to the tip that makes Sana's expression simper - "you’re halfway there. Want him to cum in that sweet mouth?"

"Want him to tell me what he's going to do," says Miyeon, frilly. "Every last detail."

Lips stretching open, fingers splaying, curling around the weight - she dips her head to rest her cheek on your thigh and kisses the underside of your shaft. She’s practically like liquid. Flowing and easy and gorgeous, always gorgeous, too far gone to form a full thought. That much is obvious. And why shouldn't it be - your hand's already snagged up, your thumb's already wiping the hair out of her eyes. She turns to let it sit against the edge of her cheekbone. "You really need an incentive? Want you to fill me up so I can-"

"Swallow," you supply, simply. “Swallow everything.”

"Yeah," Miyeon presses into the curve of your cock. She doesn't wink, not really; she doesn’t need to. "I like you. You always know exactly what to say."

Her hair brushes a feather-light caress up the skin of your thigh, mouth a vision of sin and pretty red lipstick. "Open," you command, quietly, and she follows your orders exactly - mouth dropping, head tilting, eyes drifting closed - her lips glisten with saliva and you could shove your cock into that mouth, easy. Just push in and wreck the inside of her - spit on her chin, feel her throat clench up as she gags and struggles around your cock. God, if that isn't a thought that can do a number on the base of your spine.

"Easy," Sana supplies, like she can read your mind. That wouldn’t really surprise you. “Leave some of her make-up for me.”

There's the quick hiss of an inhale, Miyeon's mouth stretching open. Her jaw going slack. You feel the long, wet suck of skin and spit, and her eyelids flutter as she settles in. She slides her tongue and adjusts, makes soft, raspy, throaty noises while her lips slide down the first few inches of your cock. It’s funny - Sana had made the same sound earlier in the day - and it's really not like it's an awful comparison. They both let on gorgeous little noises when they're sucking cock and it makes sense because it's the same cock. Same skin. Same person.

You're not, however, about to do something so pedestrian as compare notes. Not on them. Not in the fucking slightest.

And Sana, god - Sana doesn't just watch. She knows better. She's not even the one taking your cock in her mouth but there's the insistent presence of her: a fingertip diving down past the crotch of her skirt, a quiet moan, her wrist jolting in a repetition of short, sharp strokes, the kind she likes to use on herself: precise. Deliberate.

"Miyeon," you whisper. "God, just - it's your fucking mouth, you-"

The hand on her face strokes the side of her head - a push-pull. A chance to break off - she doesn't - so she ends up with a rougher grip tangling through her hair and you guiding her head further down the length of your shaft.

Miyeon loves the pressure on her throat. You know that. And, yeah, she fucking hates choking on it but somehow in her mind, they're different. Opposites. Because with the way she's going, a little cough will burst free in a few seconds time. That’s your signal, you’ve learned, that she'll let you slide yourself to the hilt. Just keep the wet tip lodged there until she starts gasping around it. It'd only take a minute.

Two tops.

And well, that's the compromise: your patience for a throat fuck is infinite. She's staring up at you with upturned brows and that pretty-please pout on her slick-wet lips. She's making her best effort but, christ. Fuck.

Her eyelids flicker once.

Then close.

"There," you breathe down to her, your knuckles finding her cheek, smoothing over the sharp curve of bone there. Your cock is slotted right in her hot little mouth and you're starting to feel like maybe you really did hang the moon and stars in the sky after all. Her lips press around you. Sink, up, down. "Such a good girl, sucking my cock, looking up at me- god, all dolled up, it's not even fair, Miyeon."

Miyeon can be many things, and presently among them: a filthy, obedient angel.

She pulls up. "I try," Miyeon breathes right at the tip. Her tongue darts out. She swirls, and swirls, until it’s back under the tip of your cock again, soft.

You're too predictable, or you're too forthcoming, or here’s the thing about a woman's intuition; Miyeon wants to tell you something more, she wants to let you know how fucking unbelievably hard you are in her hands right now; she wants to laugh at you for getting caught up and dumb but she's not letting your cock slide free. This suckle of her lips, right at the crest where you're most sensitive and leaking precum right into her mouth - this press and pull is as close to conversation as she can get. So what. You love it. She loves it: the reward is in the ricochet. You look at her and her cheeks hollow and the flash of her pink tongue gets wet and warm under your head, the slit of her mouth stretching to take every ‘totally fucking perfect’ inch of your cock.

And then her lips tighten and she just-

"Christ, Miyeon-" You whimper it right down to her, your voice lost in the shiver of her throat, all tight and wet around your cock. It's like your vocal cords have been stolen right along with the air in your lungs and everything feels floaty, warped and red and blanketing you with Miyeon's hard-worked rhythm:

The scissoring flick of her tongue as she strokes the base with a firm fist. The other hand resting on your hip, feeling your hips jerk. She wants this, the part where you let go and stop thinking. The part where she opens her throat, lets her saliva flood to pool against her palm, and wet the tip of your cockhead before letting it slide right back in her throat. Your shaft flexing into her heat, the sound of those gags.

She just-

She just goes on like that, sucking your cock while the flat of her palm skates a little tighter. Up, up, down - up-

"Miyeon," Sana says, now on her feet and shadowing in closer, leaning. And that's it. Sana knows too. She kneels down next to her, gets a finger under her chin, and delivers in a uniquely cold tone: "hands behind your back, sweetheart. I want him to cum in your gorgeous little mouth."

You nearly choke, ironically. You're already grabbing so much of her hair: all those smooth silky strands threaded through your fingers.

You thrust and pull. She gags. She fucking chokes.

Spit collects, rolls down the corners of her mouth and gathers on her chin. You can see the mascara threaten to run tracks along her pretty cheeks, the way the makeup smudges so dangerously close to her bottom lid. "Yeah?" you say, so softly, but you can't - can't seem to look anywhere else, or take anything back - so, what, her jaw's just gonna go on being that perfect little shape, and she's gonna be a brat for it. Okay. That works. She looks good choking. You can see the slick glint of her pink mouth stretching taut on your cock, your cock jerking and bobbing on the pad of her tongue; it's not real - no, this is completely real. The ball of your foot slips along the floor.

It's instinct. You can't help yourself; a groan spills out of you, half-sighed

Sana's whispering right in her ear; not that you can make anything out of it over the noises from her mouth, her fist all wet, pumping. The tick-tock bob of her hair. Sana's hand is on the back of her head and then - pushing the last inch down, and down, her nose buries right into your skin.

“Mnnph.” Miyeon, gurgling: your cock pressed all the way down the line.

"Fuck," you spit, holding her jaw in place. "Fuck, Miyeon-"

She looks up at you, her eyebrows cinched, the graceful lines in her picture-perfect-face pulling around you - blissed out. She stutters in place while you dump a hot load of cum into her mouth.

And she adds a cough as you pump everything directly onto her fucking tongue. It’s more than she anticipated, judging by the leak. How your cum rolls down from the corner of her mouth.

Sana drops a kiss onto her temple as she takes you in and out of her mouth again, until she presses her lips firm and hollows her cheeks. Miyeon's fingers caress your balls like there's some part of you that isn't giving her fucking everything already.

"Come on, princess," says Sana, kissing her way along Miyeon's neck, the tops of her shoulders. There is not an angle to Miyeon's elegant features that she could take that could possibly be anything short of priceless. "Show him how you swallow."

The image is obscene, for one thing. The utter filth in that satiated hum; there’s another. 

It's your white-hot cum dribbling past her swollen, fucked mouth. Miyeon swallows like the good girl she is - takes a breath, stares, and then finishes, a gulp, an extra breath, her whole face now a shade more flushed. Sana kisses her on the cheek and suddenly it's perfect: they're both staring right at you. Your throat has to unclench, reboot and the air in the room just tastes so good and your chest is heaving; you just- fuck, you can't breathe-

"Shit," you exhale. It comes out like a small explosion. "Uh-"

The side of Sana's mouth slants and then Miyeon grins: it's her cheek, dimple; that crescent moon thing and oh, this is the point. Sana slides a hand over the gentle curve of her stomach, then sets her open mouth over Miyeon's still-lips, slipping in close and - kissing. Their mouths melt together like it's the most practiced thing, tongues a second later, and Sana is stroking your cock in her fingers; the expectations clear in every little coaxing flick of her slim wrist.

"Do you have any idea," Sana sighs against her lips. The two of them, blinking up at you, like good little things - sweet enough. "How fucking wet you both have me?"

And Miyeon, shameless as she is disastrously pretty, reads right between the lines. "Where do you want it?" Her mouth tilts up to the side. A wicked smile. "He can cum all over us, no? And I have this skirt with an awfully short, pretty lace. We don't even have to take our clothes off, really, I can just-"

Sana gets an eyeful - Miyeon - before cutting her off, silencing with the wet press of her mouth, and suddenly their kiss goes frantic and quick. They're rolling apart: hands tearing up their clothes. Off. Off. Off.

Your cock stirs. It throbs. Fuck. Sana’s barely intelligible in the space between their tongues. "I could lay flat,” she’s saying, “with my legs open, and-"

"-with him on top of you, pressing inside you - so he could hold me down, and then pull all the way back out, to leave a thick load on your clit-"

"-and when he has to pull out-"

"-probably cum all over you too, the best view-"

"-or all over the rest of me, while I touch myself-"

"-maybe-"

"-and you just have to imagine how good that'll feel, while my thighs shake and we ride it out, you and I-"

Their faces - both flushed and dampened with the strain, both breathtaking. Their eyes are hooded, lashes a-flutter. They'd made their own decision, didn't even bother with yours. A mutual vote of two-to-one: you're going to fuck them in turns. You’re going to fuck them together. You're going to edge yourself in one cunt and fill the other. They're both going to take it, and wear it, and then use each other to make you cum again. Good. Okay, any questions - and they want it rough? 

The answer’s a two-part chorus. Yes.

-

Not even an hour later, Miyeon is playing, of all fucking things, Candy Crush, legs draped lazily across Sana's lap, both of them kicked back on the couch, dressed again like the best girls you've ever seen. "The amount of money they make on this app-" Miyeon complains, waving a lazy hand. A long strand of blonde brushes against the corner of her mouth before she swipes it away again with an irritated sigh. She's just sitting there, knees folded, blithely bitching about a game of match three on her phone. "And they send these fucking blocks just to mess with me," - another swipe. Her hair sticks against the fresh gloss coating her lips. "It's literally just a waste of human-fucking-potential."

"It's a game for children," you offer.

"Then why is it marketed at adults, hm?" She's absolutely serious. "Sana plays it too."

"Mhmm," Sana agrees, not really agreeing at all. Her eyes are closed; you're sitting next to her, and she's taken up your leg as a makeshift pillow, lying down with her arm resting on her forehead, so casually disinterested in anything other than the quiet thrumming of your presence by her side.

It's insane that they're like this: like they're not constantly checking their phones for texts, like you don't all have lives. You're almost - dare you think - having a semi-regular conversation. Now If for a moment you could ignore how they both look like the human embodiment of sin-

"Miyeonie," Sana says.

"Sana," Miyeon returns, flat.

There's not even a movie playing on the living room TV - just the netflix menu; it's volume is at a sort of white noise. A subtle buzz clicks on in the air conditioner.

"You know how you're supposed to go out with that guy next weekend."

"You mean the date you set me up with." Miyeon pauses, tongue caught between her teeth. "Where I have to put on a pretty little dress. And smile. And laugh at all his jokes."

"You know the one."

Miyeon jumps on Sana's train of thought. "You want me to send you some pictures when it's over."

Sana turns it over in her head a few times. “Maybe,” she says, finally.

A genuine exchange perhaps. No fighting, no bullshit, no riptide of pure unbridled sexual frustration.

"Or," Sana adds, simply, "you skip the part where you sabotage the small talk and come back to our apartment." She blinks. "End up getting us both."

“You’re suggesting I’ve been ruining dates on purpose?” Miyeon, incredulous, runs her fingers through the hair at the top of her head, gentle, almost like an admission of guilt. "You're out of your mind. Why would I do that?"

The fragile peace never does last long. Sana looks at you again. Holds onto the eye roll. "Why, indeed."

"I don't follow," Miyeon says; something, a tic, a tell, causes the muscle in her brow to stutter.

"She's suggesting that you'd rather be in bed between us than on a date with some guy whose face we've only seen once," you cut in. Sana looks over. "It's come up a few times."

"Okay, so what?" Miyeon takes a breath. Her mouth a rictus twist. "You're trying to get me to admit it out loud? That I like to get fucked by my gorgeous bestfriend and her pinterest-board-of-a-boyfriend more than I'd like going to a mediocre concert downtown with some dipshit who just wants to see if I'll stick out this 'goddess' routine for a month or two and then bounce for someone else. Wow. Sherlock and Watson, coming through for the killshot. Take me straight to jail."

"We never got around to those cuffs," is what you make mention of. It's not particularly helpful.

"Don't pretend," Sana says instead, "you don’t like to play both sides. Or that the trad-wife fantasy of yours is somehow subtle."

“There's nothing shameful about knowing exactly who you are, or wanting something," Miyeon insists. She tilts her head towards the two of you. A different angle. Her words come out sharp and hot: "some of us have the decency to let our friends know exactly what they want."

“Okay.” You laugh out loud, half out of nervous habit. "Well obviously there’s some sort of rhythm here - I’m just not dumb enough to think I can put a finger on the pulse."

"Then this is, what, some sort of elaborate plot for my heart?" Miyeon's chuckling to herself, but in the space of a blink her voice is more tender. Her arms folding in close. "Is that the plan, finally catching me-"

"Next week." Sana sits up. "There's a trip coming up, something kind of international." She picks at the hem of her sweater, and looks at you.

“What the hell, exactly” - you card your hand through Sana’s hair - “does ‘kind of’ international entail?”

"Ms. Prada has a modeling campaign to attend," Miyeon intones. "She also needs someone to take care of the jetlag, is what I assume this is about."

Sana waves her hand in the air. "I'm saying we book you an extra ticket. Rent a room at a nice hotel. No work. No phones. Just us three, and the best sex you've ever had."

“I wasn’t even aware I was going to that,” you say - almost as an aside.

“You weren’t.” Sana leans more of herself into you. "You are now."

"Is this how you're going to woo me? The grand design?" Miyeon's hands are fiddling in her lap. Sana’s pressing in. Closer. "All the sex and leisure I could ever ask for?"

“It sounds ridiculous when you say out loud,” Sana answers, curling into her. “But, yeah, that’s pretty much it.”

Miyeon laughs like it’s a lost cause. Genuine, throaty - like music.

“Simplicity doesn’t have to be a bad thing, Miyeon.” Sana kisses her, slow. Quietly, "you could even pack a swimsuit," and there's this beat, the rise and fall of Miyeon's breathing that might lead anywhere: "though I doubt we touch the beach at all."

“You’re pulling on all my heartstrings, Sana.”

And there you are - etching your names onto the calendar. Reservations and bookings and promises of everything and anything and exactly where you all want to be.

It's Miyeon that finally admits, "you know part of me can’t resist the idea."

"Then, this weekend." Sana's fingertips trace circles on your hip, the tensing pull of muscle. You're aching and exhausted and content: drifting in the tide, a catch of the day, some soft, dreamy wave of consciousness, nothing specific, just the moment passing through all three of you.

But you do get it. There's this obvious snag in your heartbeat, too.

Because Sana is grinning; her fingertips, tapping. Your stomach's fluttering too. A little ghostly clutch of hope in your chest and it's such an embarrassing notion. You're getting swept away - pulled under - and it's Miyeon, splaying out beside Sana, her hand reaching out to you with her palm turned up. It's a promise, and the force of her can - and has - moved mountains.

"I pick the hotel," Miyeon's voice is deeply firm and sure. She’s got a fistful of Sana’s pajamas. "You two can sort out the lingerie."

Sana's mouth curves a perfect grin. She's kissing her again: wet. Heavy. It's not a no, if she was ever expecting one.

-

So that's your reality: what used to be two dalliances - separate but not distinct - now share one headspace, and there's enough rapport just in the group chat alone. You've all been messaging back-and-forth for weeks; Miyeon playing the game where she's the steady one in your life, the knot you're going to tie down when you can finally afford it (and in every way she can imagine). You find it entertaining. Sana seems mildly amused. And Miyeon will call you on the phone, sometimes. A chat-off. About nothing and everything. What you should bring on the trip. Where she's going to eat dinner before you meet her at the airport. Et cetera. Et cetera.

// Miyeon 1:21 AM > hey. I'm all finished packing. how's the bedroom looking?

// 1:26 AM > absolutely wrecked. no survivors

// Sana 1:27 AM > It’s fine. We stripped the sheets, got the box from the closet. Have the video you wanted as well. Call the laundry service in the morning and get the floor washed too. You know. So, nothing comes out of the security deposit.

// Miyeon 1:29 AM > a threesome that destroyed an apartment? say it isn't so

// Sana 1:34 AM > didn't hear you complain during.

// 1:38 AM > strict instructions, right?

And then sometimes, during those conversations, Miyeon will send an aside just for you:

// Miyeon 1:40 AM > strict? please. do whatever. I'm like so good at following instructions

That's Miyeon. The paradox of being submissive - you never, ever treat her gently. She never really wants you to. Sana's mid-reach over your chest to turn off the lights when she glances down at Miyeon's text, then promptly scoffs. The two of them don't always have the most conventional dialogue.

"She's one hundred percent serious by the way." Sana rolls on her side, away, but the nightlight beside the bed just manages to illuminate the slope of her ass - curved in the silk nightie she'd thrown on before bed. You want to crawl between the fabric.

"I never really doubted that. She's got a very specific... demeanor.”

“You’ve noticed.”

“Um,” you say. Sana’s turned over her shoulder to blink at you. “Kind of a dark streak. Like something in her is craving-"

"To be broken to pieces? Oh, it's fucking bliss for her when she's vulnerable and the tension cracks." 

“I was going to phrase it a little more indirectly than that, but yes, I suppose that’s the gist of it.”

Sana shrugs. 

"The girl lives to be chased is what it is.

It's just Sana and her perfect legs and smooth, creamy thighs right there, ready for you to touch, ready for you to fall apart over. They brush your calf, your thigh - so you are kind of distracted. 

“And she feels most wanted when she's choking, getting used, right at the point she can't decide if another inch is gonna kill her or drive her up the wall. No air in her lungs, nothing under her own control." Sana flops, presses against your side, one leg tossed on top, arms curled around your neck. "Pretty obvious, all things considered."

"Sounds a bit familiar, no?" you tease, and reach back to draw her against the front of your body. 

She curves, twists into your embrace. Her hair is half up, half down - wide eyed like a fantasy made manifest. You're always gonna give in, even when Sana doesn't deserve it. 

"You get me. It’s the best. Please, go nuts with the idea."

“Huh, birds of a feather.”

“Sure, whatever,” Sana brushes a kiss against your cheek, presses back into your hips to feel your hard length strain between your boxers and her ass, softening only because, god, she's a real human fucking treasure, "so maybe Miyeon and I have a certain… similar temperment to us, maybe that's true."

"Yeah," you breathe. Your arms wrap around her, the heat in her core now evident from the outside. "That's what I've been saying."

Sana doesn't respond to that, not directly; her palms drag, smooth, over your fingers. "Fuck me to sleep," she suggests instead. "We've got an early flight."

And so you do. You'd pulled your cock from your shorts the second she pressed her ass into your waist and claimed her place as your other half, the little spoon. There's a few beats, a few breaths, where you'd rocked against her clumsily, lining yourself up, and she'd braced the two of you:

She'd arched her back, got an arm over her head to tangle a hand into your hair and keep you right where you were - your lips against her neck. Until it's just this soft-rhythm, all easy thrusts; one arm underneath her, the other around her hip, finding and spreading and - easily - gliding into her cunt.

Sana sighs a lovely sound right next to your ear: your name, some hushed curse. Her hand is wrenched back into whatever group of muscles she can find. And you listen to the gorgeous little tritone of oh shit, oh god, oh fuck when you make her cum. The displays of indulgent affection in her throat, then the ruddy mess of you working her to a wreck of pleasured exhaustion until she collapses into a hot-faced, sleepy daze. All cozy between the sheets, the duvet - you’d fucked her from the outside in; made her relieved and relaxed, all loose and calm. Sana curls into you with her moans still staining the cool side of her pillow and the snugness of her cunt wrapped around your cock.

You drift off just like that, snug inside her. Sana is, as always, impossibly warm.

-

On your phone, there are some choice text messages:

// Miyeon 2:18 AM > jesus

// Miyeon 2:18 AM > can you guys like please

// Miyeon 2:18 AM > PLEASE

// Miyeon 2:18 AM > fuck any quieter

Okay, so it's not perfect. But you're about ninety-percent sure Miyeon had used every fiber of her willpower not to float across the hall and take her spot between the both of you. And it's probably for the best. You feel pretty rough when the alarm starts blaring as it is.

-

The room Miyeon picks out isn’t exactly small, nor was she minding the purse strings. There's a wide expanse of living area, a massive bed in the back; the ensuite and bath beyond that has a walk-in shower large enough for all three of you and room left over. On the walls is gentrification-colored paint, a gray laminate flooring to match; there is not one speck of dust. It feels every bit the palace it is on the outside - the gables and mansard roofs and the Juliette balconies - gothic, or neoclassical. Something vaguely European, with all its rich furnishings and pristine fixtures to boot.

Sana and Miyeon step into the space with all the familiarity of royalty.

"Warm in here," says Sana, appraising; her black chiffon, nearly translucent, fans about her hips with each tiny sway. In her white pumps, she's already a perfect tease and she hasn't even touched herself yet. "Smells good, though."

Miyeon's heels echo behind her like gunshots against the floor, and it's really not ever fair the way a skirt wears her. "The listing said something about a hospitality kit, and essential oils - there should be a basket of things. Do you want me to start the water?"

"Let's settle in a little first," Sana suggests, and without any fanfare, the first thing she does is draw the gauzy curtain closed.

There's an itinerary; it's an ongoing event. Technically it all started in the airport terminal when Sana slung her arm around Miyeon's waist and her hand went straight down to her ass. She just gave it a little squeeze. In the moment, nothing terribly remarkable, but then again, Miyeon didn't tell her not to. They walked through security like that and picked out drinks together from a terminal cafe before doing a circuit, fingers linked. The way Sana looks at her now - Miyeon sees - is how she's always looked at her. That is maybe, the whole point.

"Come here."

Sana's tone is smooth as silk, her mouth an inviting pucker, gloss-dewy and delicious. The bow is even tied at the back: Sana's collar is fitted snug. It sits tight at the base of her neck with the silvery cord loose across her shoulder, knotted down near the apex of her spine. It's simple, classic. All soft fabric and no frill, with an absence that invites eyes and wandering fingertips: she hasn't worn a bra. No strap lines. Her body has the sweetest outline and the warmest curves and god, the skin she's not showing is as good as what she is.

"So," you say out loud. It hits you: there's no cameras, no urgency. No obligations. "We came all the way here just so Sana could have sex, huh."

It's really always about the two of them.

"Good sex," Sana corrects. The table next to her catches the flat of her palm as she settles herself against the surface, one leg crossing in front. The slit in her dress rises in the movement: enough of a hint at the soft thigh underneath. You see her do this every once in a while and her body doesn't lie; this is an implicit act of seduction. But when she looks back up, her smile goes shy and her voice follows suit: "I promised our princess that we'd spoil her a little."

You say, "she's right there," at the same time Sana adds- "which is kind of impossible when she's still wearing her clothes."

Miyeon makes a big, showy production of crossing her arms in a huff. You could do anything; flip a switch; knock her flat against the wall, and Sana would hold her down with a hand at her throat and a kiss her like fire and gasoline on her tongue and no one would have a single word to say to complain.

You could have. Would have. But Miyeon finds her fingertips on the ridge of her clavicle, the barest swipe. She pulls at the top button of her shirt and the seam unlatches: a single reveal, a gradual, fluid movement in the dip and fall of a one inch gap. Just enough skin to make you and Sana swallow.

"Oh?" Miyeon grins. She stares at you with that coy smirk, biting her lip; an invitation for a kiss. For a fuck. You cross the gap, with every intention of making good on it; only, Sana slips in behind her - stops her midway in undoing the next button - and places a hand on the nape of Miyeon's neck, cool.

"She really can be a brat, can't she."

"Only because she gets rewarded for it," you admit, and as soon as Sana touches her, Miyeon is looking up with that same face she gives you when she gets on her knees, ready to be just your little pet, your desperate, whimpering thing.

Sana leans into her ear: "maybe because she knows she can't stop thinking about you bending her over, every chance she gets. Isn’t that right, pretty girl?"

They've always been like this, you think. Growing up with money and cars and ski vacations in the Alps: that sort of thing. It's been a long, slow, build-up and this was always the payoff. It is, without a doubt, just the slightest taste of luxury. Sana pushes, and Miyeon turns up to her mouth with a slow, dangerous whisper. "Isn't it kinder to say it as it is, instead of dancing around it for weeks-"

"For months," corrects Sana, and then sliding into a far more generous tone, "mouths, fingers- or his cock?"

"Maybe," Miyeon lifts her chin like she's readying to kiss, "all three."

Her voice drips - purses her lips, and you're there again: at that fateful exchange. Everything about Miyeon has the power to sink its claws deep. Those heels on her dainty little feet, the stockings climbing along her thighs. Everything.

"Miyeon." That comes out harsher than you'd have thought.

"What can I say? I'm not a patient person." She's got that wild, starry-eyed look to her. You could tame her. You could dominate her - your throat is so dry. The room has the faint scent of citrus, like lemon rind and verbena - a kind of lightheadedness settling over you all. "So, why don't you..." She's blushing, holding her arm up as she skims a finger down this slow path along your torso, finally hooking it into the top of your pants. And now, it's very, very clear she isn't wearing a bra either. "Make things a bit easier."

There's an entire lexicon of everything you'd like to do, so it's best, maybe, that you settle for: "Sana, be a doll."

"Anything," she says; she doesn't hesitate. You like the easy give.

And it's kind of amazing. All three of you together and, sure, the way her fingertips tighten, sliding under the curve of Miyeon's chin and then pulling the linen shirt down from the backs of her shoulders - this is a choice you can all agree on. One that pulls on the elastic band hugging the cut of Miyeon's waist, makes the material drag and ride up the front of her legs. Her belly. Sana has the gift of being able to kiss so perfectly on the back of someone's neck that you could easily forget she can get a little mean, too.

"What is it, baby." Sana asks; a challenge, not a question. "Come on, love. You know it's true. Why don't you let me show him how sweetly you moan with just a pair of fingers in your cunt."

"Please do."

"You're practically wet just saying it. You want it that much." Her voice goes thin, then deep again: a stark contrast. "Show him the mess you've made."

Miyeon's hand is in all the way in your pants; you feel hot. Like the room's air conditioning should've kicked on a lifetime ago - you're trying not to think too much on the way her slender fingers start to wrap themselves around the shape of your cock and your mouth falls open, because she can just - fuck - do that-

They turn to each other like mirror images over the slope of Miyeon’s shoulder, exchanging some secretive wordlessness in the privacy of their smiles and soft, muted laughter. Miyeon's on the toes of those pretty pumps to lean in, closer, further, and Sana lets her.

Which is exactly how it happens: Miyeon kissing you. And she really kisses you, sweet, delicate - and somehow all-consuming. It sets off this chain reaction, a wildfire of unbridled desire: that thread in Sana that can be almost violent, and one that Miyeon always manages to bring to the surface of her skin. Because now Miyeon's gripped and pinned, and Sana, bless her, pulls the fabric of her own dress up over her head until she's naked alongside her. Working towards a common goal. Here's two hands. Here's two more. They're helping you out of your shirt. It's pretty easy from there. You're all unraveling together, just falling apart - Sana and you, working in tandem to unclasp the pearl snap buttons trailing up and down the sides of Miyeon's sinfully short skirt, peeling back the cotton. Miyeon holds the swell of your cock tight in one hand, pumping, while Sana rakes her nails over Miyeon's breasts; both girls taking off the final scraps until every article of clothing is tossed to the floor.

And Miyeon here is simply unbelievable. Your hands are all over her. Her razor-fine waist, her thighs. Her lips. Those soft tits, and that cute mole above her nipple. Because even her imperfections deserve the same lavish attention.

You kiss her, and kiss her, and you can't help thinking how filthy it feels. This wet mouth and tongue, everything you could want in the slide of her mouth - just, messy-perfect and a bit sloppy; how her whimpers leak out in soft, a tight inhale. You cup the side of her jaw as your hips grind into her and a low, uneven sound escapes you. Sana's small fingers wrap her ribs to grip a breast, knead the supple curve and supply her thumb to the indent. It's really, so soft, and warm, and then wet: your precum dribbling over her knuckles, rolling down. Miyeon has her head tilted to let her jaw lean into your palm - she smiles, and laughs like it's nothing - like you're not there, towering over her lithe little frame. Like the head of your cock isn't brushing into her bottom rib under all the twists and jerks of her wrist.

"Your cock is so hard," Miyeon threads into a sigh, in that throaty, almost melodic voice. And then she laughs because she knows exactly what it’ll fucking do to her. "And fucking heavy. I thought I was going to get a real good look earlier in the airport," she confesses.

"Let me guess." Sana presses a kiss to her temple from behind; a lull in the scene. You fuck yourself gently into the curl of her fist. "You've been thinking about it this whole time. About getting him inside you. With that naughty little mind of yours running at a million miles an hour. God, that must've been such a tease, getting stuck with just the thought while we sat through lunch, and the flight-"

"Don’t forget right now-" Miyeon presses in. Her breath is hot against your neck. "While we're talking."

"Princess," Sana says into her ear, and it makes her tip her head - until she’s revealing the pale skin of her neck. God, yeah; maybe she really is nobility. "I'd be hard-pressed to leave you wanting. Your body's all wound up for us."

"She's fucking soaked," you confirm, like you aren't pointing out the most obvious thing in the room.

Miyeon bites her lip; you're gripping your shaft, urging her wrist to go faster. "This is the part where you turn me inside-out, no?" Miyeon is a walking fucking cliche and she knows it, smiling all slyly with her teeth. She says it so damn casually: "so why isn’t my pussy getting any attention, really. I wonder, I wonder-"

"Trust me, neither of us are interested in teasing," Sana assures her. "We're going to fuck you until you can't remember your own name. And then we'll fuck you some more."

You push down hard on her collarbone, and in that same instant Sana drops her free hand below and runs the flats of her fingertips along the plane of Miyeon’s tummy - until Miyeon tilts her hips - everything else still, almost lazy. Her feet leave the floor and then come back down again. The momentum of the fall ends up being enough to jostle the three of you towards the nearest wall where Sana's back is kissing the cold drywall. And you're already there - pressed into both: Miyeon's palms flat against your chest as you haul her thighs around your waist.

Hoisted, lifted, cradled between you and your girlfriend - who by the way is inching two fingertips under the top of a lacy-banded thong, slipping beneath the white trim, to finally (oh, god) pull her hand away and slip it into Miyeon's parted mouth. "Look at you." A hum in her chest. "The most beautiful, perfect-"

(You push your cock into her, and hand to god, you swear Miyeon's voice breaks like a bottle over pavement.)

"And all for us- your slutty little pussy is already so wet- Miyeonie, we've barely even started.”

Just think. The code word system you've been employing for months - "We were actually thinking... if you're not doing anything else... what's the harm in the two of us getting more familiar with you." - has proved exceptionally reliable in getting Miyeon out of her clothes and into your lap, but here's where it all vanishes into thin air. Sana's mouth is hovering over Miyeon's shoulder; her body, caught between the two of you. And she's trading in on the implied permission to tell you more directly:

"She needs to cum all over that cock, babe. Fuck her pussy until she’s creaming, won't you."

"Right." You groan in tacit approval, hands holding firm onto the firm swell of her hips - that round little ass, the dimples you can feel the dip of, just under your thumbs. She's already thrown her arms up around the back of your neck when your cock slips inside her, to tug you in; this wordless begging: need, need, need.

It's not even a totally new sensation. Nor is it even the first you've ever been inside her, but god - Miyeon takes one deep breath, and on the second inhale, you sink another thick inch of your cock into her slippery slit: she's completely, gloriously bare, just this slick heat that only opens more and more and more. You draw back, thrust in, and there's this sopping sound, all wet press, into the soft muscle - you don't even remember pulling her panties to the side. But they're bunched into the crease of her thigh and that's rather convenient.

Her breath hitches as she slots down onto your shaft, again - in rhythm - like a total dream. "Fuck, that's so tight," she grates, her voice rough and gutted; something like, 'I cannot believe you feel this good.'

-and they groan in unison when you pick up speed. All of it. Together.

Because it's not just Miyeon's perfect cunt wrapping you up tight, squeezing and pulsing, even better on the backstroke - but it's the way Sana is catching your lips in the space over Miyeon’s shoulder. That you three can play each other with the promise that every last moan or gasp or the single, resounding thrill of pleasure will find a perfect partner: one for your mouth and one for Sana's fingers at Miyeon's collar bone, a tickle along her hip, pressing an insistent fingertip around and around in small circles, dipping into the give.

Her body's shaking so much through every push and pull. Fuck. She's so small - and you're the one filling her. Fucking her. Breaking her. Pressing two girls into the wall like you've earned the right. You're splitting Miyeon apart so that Sana can fill the spaces you leave empty and vice versa: and she's so, so desperate, the little noises she's making, "Please," like it hurts. "Fuck," like it's the best feeling. "Keep going, please, fuck- don't stop."

"See, baby? It feels better when you just give up, doesn't it?" Sana's got her fingers down further between Miyeon's thighs; you can see her swipe upwards. Hear the wet sound. She says, "there," into her ear. "Nice and slow, while he fucks that cunt, and I rub you like this, we want to keep making you feel good. So take what you need, hm. I don't hear you-"

"Oh my god," Miyeon moans. And she means it - feels herself dripping all over you. "I need it. I need it, I-"

"Come on, darling," Sana chuckles, soft and low in her ear.

"N-need," Miyeon chokes.

And what kind of idiot wouldn't take their palm off her breast, or undig their fingers from the round of her ass for even a second. It's having her in the palm of your hand. With one foot dangling against your thigh and the other tangled up above you, the stretch in Miyeon's body is entirely for the convenience of letting you fuck her to pieces.

"There it is," Sana is murmuring into your mouth again, and that’s a reward of its own, her wet, full kiss at the junction between Miyeon’s neck and shoulder as her thumb digs deeper into the curve of the girl’s thigh. You listen to Miyeon moan your own name, uttered like it was written by god and meant to form on her lips as it tumbles down through the ragged mess of pants and gasps.

“Fuck, baby-” You press harder. “Your pussy feels incredible- how you suck me right up like you're the good girl you love to pretend you are- like a perfect toy," you breathe, "-all nice and hot. Licking, swallowing around my cock, getting dicked out for my enjoyment-"

"Yeah, yes," she pants out, the total capitulation. "It feels so fucking good."

You feel the mindless, blissful roll. A rhythm in the give of her thighs as you slide home again and again. There's a clink from the bracelets on her wrists; her hair falling into her eyes; there's the sheer ecstasy written all over her pretty face when Sana reaches one hand to start drawing slow circles on her clit. 

"You're just fucking me so god-damn-good." She’s breathless; you’re taking everything from her. The poise, the finesse, the dignity.

"Of course we are," Sana supplies, and it's fitting. You're both holding her up. You'll be the ones tearing her down.

Miyeon's arms tighten around the back of your head, arching, squeezing, and there's that feeling that always accompanies Miyeon: like she's completely melting you to her core and turning your brains into fucking mush. Everything from her tight little pussy to her breathtakingly pretty eyes to the way her spine flexes to meet the pitch of her voice - it's fucking ridiculous, that she's even real in the first place - let alone that your cock is buried so deep in her cunt you think you can hear her sob. Or that all five-foot-two of her is making these tiny desperate noises as you use the width of her hips to bounce her harder onto your cock. 

Sana's long fingers slip and press - they're not touching anything except the swell of her pussy, just this ghostly brush of a light, almost chaste graze. It's enough: a touch like that, and fuck, another-

Miyeon cries out.

“I'm going to cum-"

"Say it again," Sana's whispering, "tell us what you need," and in a sort of coup-de-grace-style-of-climax, she bites at the skin over the top of Miyeon's jaw and slips a fingertip right onto her aching clit. Presses down. "You're such a fucking slut, Miyeon, such a gorgeous cocksleeve-"

"I-"

She's actually whimpering, the poor thing. Eyes squeezed shut, toes clenching; everything is trembling, tense with release. You’re fucking her into a puddle of a person, and she’s holding her lip between her teeth like it might do a goddamn thing. It makes sense; the tightness, and wet and heat is what she knows.

"Go on," Sana answers her, and it's like her words slice the voice in Miyeon’s throat to shreds, "cum all over his cock. So. Fucking. Good, baby," a hard push through every syllable as her teeth snag into the shell of her ear. She rides the boundary of degradation and downright debasement because she knows that’s how Miyeon will absolutely cum for her. For you, for both of you. "Do what you're fucking made for, and just take it, pretty, lovely, you can’t live a second without having his fat cock and my fingers in you, can you? You look like a filthy little angel like this, I swear."

You’re both on the same page, telling her over and over - shh, shh, you take that cock so well, feel that cock fuck you apart, baby, and all you have to do is cum - only, you’re paying homage to the title: you call her princess. Sana takes the opposite approach. Tells her, "you want everyone to know, don't you, what a goddamn fucking slut you are. You filthy, dirty little thing-"

It works. They both work, and so does everything else.

Your blood has gone totally hot. Like molten lava. Boiling over and about to spill.

The last thing Miyeon says: "Oh god - I'll be good, I'll do anything, I'll be your slut - Sana - anything-"

And it's one of the best lines to ever leave her mouth.

"-for this beautiful cock and these fucking perfect fingers, shit - fuck! Right there, right there, right-fucking-there-"

You fuck deeper, harder. The orgasm ripping through her muscles lets you leave marks and bruises you’ll be coming back to all weekend. Miyeon's face falls against the crook of your neck, mouth pressed there - you can feel every gasping inhale, the open-mouthed warmth of her body. It's you that whispers a shudder, half-voweled - "Miyeon," and she’s already there, so ready - it's kind of crazy how everything about this girl works so intricately and precise, like her very design was to take you to the hilt and melt all over your cock, because Miyeon's response comes as a mind-blanking:

"You can," a muffled whine in her throat. "Do it. Cum inside me. I want to-"

Sana’s eyes flare like she can feel that cable snapping, too. How your mind is all white noise. The torque of blood rushing through your head. You're thrusting deep into her well-fucked cunt with all the strength you can muster, your hips stuttering in the follow-through. When you catch the smile in her lips - the curl in her lips like she knows you’re about to spill everything, like the perfect siren’s call- you hear Sana over her shoulder: "fuck her. Use her. I think she wants to feel it in her fucking stomach - you know, the whole reason we’re here-"

You cum inside her - there’s no question - filling her tight hole up. Shit. You actually cum all over her too.

In fact, you manage to drag yourself all the way out from Miyeon, the wet quivers and hot aftershocks, all so Sana can get a good visual of how you’re fucking ruining her: the loose rope of white that streaks up her tummy, splaying out beneath her breasts. The absolute debauchery; it’s even more pornographic when your fist pumps another splatter of cum right onto the swollen lips of her pussy. Miyeon moaning on impact.

Sana supplies her own soft gasp, scraping the air past her teeth, tension hanging in the silence - and then you bury the rest of your load back inside her cunt.

And here's a feeling that's going to stick with you for a while. Beyond the fireworks in your pulse - the shake-ripple that leaves you with nothing, no muscles, no brain matter - you slide your cock through her cunt again, and again - just to feel how your cum pushes back out. And she's watching, she’s letting you watch: how messy she's become. Her tits. Her sweat-dewed thighs. How every second seems to bring its own unique ache. 

Really, you’re left only with a near mental blank. “God, Miyeon-”

You have just the barest capacity to consider the way Miyeon's trembling frame clings hard - pulling her ass cheeks down flush against your hips - your thick cock completely seated, stuffing her fucking cunt as she goes weak and submissive. You hold her there, suspended as your orgasm softens inside her and Sana hums along your lips, the soft coos spilling into Miyeon's ear: "what a messy, nasty girl. Princess needs to be full and leaking everywhere, doesn't she. How many creampies do you think you're going to ask for?” Sana laughs. “How many will ever be enough? I hope he gave you something worth begging for."

It's not really surprising how a feeling can hook its teeth into you when you're cumming like that. Subjugating the deepest reach of her sopping cunt to fulfill your own filthy fantasy. 

And look: Miyeon is soaked - soaked and wrecked and pliant. You kiss her and kiss her, and Sana kisses you, kisses her too, all of it muddled up - and your mouths are a mess. Your hands go into her hair, onto her ass; there's cum down her thighs and all over the floor. The smell of you three: her slicked arousal and your sweat and Sana's expensive perfume. 

Here, come come - Sana is a flurry of activity; she's helping Miyeon out of her second heel after you'd fucked the first one off her foot without bothering to get the strap unhooked. There's her careful proclamation of, "thank god the walls aren't paper," as you practically carry Miyeon to the edge of the sofa, this dreamy vision of messy hair and a royally-befit-blush. In the whole world, not once has Miyeon looked like anything less than nobility.

And now's no different, really.

You sink down onto the plush, tufted fabric - a chair whose shape might confuse you if Sana hadn’t told you earlier it was explicitly built for fucking, or whatever it is you're doing. She's smiling at you, settling her face right onto your shoulder and peering up.

"Sana," she says wistfully, but looks right at you. "My legs are still a noodly-mess. Could you turn on the jets in the tub?"

"And leave the two of you unsupervised?" She jokes. "Never."

Miyeon sticks out her lip. Pouts, almost: "it'd just be a second."

"She's only asking for a minute," you add in.

Sana rolls her eyes. "And since you've suddenly turned into two hopeless idiots, it can't be trusted. If I'm drawing a bath," a flick of the gaze, "the least you can do is join me. A chance to recover if nothing else."

Miyeon, being Miyeon, has already dropped her face down to your lap, curling up with your cock at her lips. When she gets her first, tantalizing, almost chaste little swipe at the tip, she smiles all impressed with herself. With those big brown eyes, her fingertips skating delicately along your stomach, and her dark lashes beating slow - all of Miyeon, right now, is on purpose, calculated. Precise. 

Her voice is even worse: "she wants her own go first, don't you think?"

Sana watches where your fingers thread into the ends of Miyeon's silky hair, just the gentlest twist and tug. How you have her mouth ready and open, waiting; how Miyeon glances over for approval.

"Well," Sana turns a cheek, "he's already so worked up." Her dark eyes look towards you - a mock frown. "I don't know if we can convince him otherwise."

Miyeon's throat clicks - she's not choking yet, but left to her own devices, she will be. Her expression melts into an almost-gasp as your cock fills the empty space in her mouth. There's that plush little gag as she opens, lips wet. You rock your hips, and then you get to watch her nose kiss the trail leading up the smooth plane of your belly.

"I could go for a soak," you admit, with Miyeon drooling on your cock.

Because Sana's doing that thing where she turns around, has the smug look over her shoulder. Makes a slow, teasing movement that leads your eyes from her pretty face all the way down the cut of her back, until finally she's pushing the soft waves of her hair into one hand so that her ass is perfectly presented-

And jesus, sure: the sloping hips, the inviting lines - the sharp points and soft edges, where she is and isn't; her cupped fingers come up to her own chest, just to show off the heft of her tits, hanging heavy. Everything is sensually posed. You're only a little bit mesmerized. Her figure has always had the cut of a pinup model. Curves like a siren. Her waist to hip ratio is - oh-fucking-kay, maybe you could do it right now - bend her in half - get her fucking sobbing until you kiss her quiet and cum so deep in her cunt it's all she can think about for days-

You realize then you're pulling too hard on Miyeon’s hair.

Not meaning to, or maybe too eager.

Hey, you have a pretty girl sucking life back into your cock and one more giving you bedroom eyes from across the room all ready to sit on it; you never said you weren't trying your best.

"Careful, honey. I'm getting impatient." Sana's hand traces the wallpaper trim in the hall, a sweeping path; a vague reminder as she disappears down and around the corner. You hear the squeak of the faucet and then the sound of her light footsteps. And then it's just an echoey and unapologetic, "one day I might not let you have all the fun," followed by, "my goodness-"

Sana, appraising her reflection in all likelihood. All bright smiles

You turn back to find a second set of eyes staring back, full of hunger, as a wet, messy heat wraps around the base of your shaft and follows to the top with the flutter of her tongue - and then all the way to the back of that tempting throat. Miyeon's moving at the tempo you'd put her at. You appreciate that. But you lift her jaw and hold the side of her face so she's looking straight at you - and as soon as you pop yourself out from between her lips, you say, "you'll let me taste Sana, too, won't you, baby?"

(Miyeon's never been good at saying no - to anything. That doesn't change here in the slightest.)

The way you laugh is easy and sweet. You kiss the space over her temple. "We've always been in this together, Miyeon," a soft tease. "Go ask her nicely, and I bet she lets you clean me up," before adding, "maybe, after you lick all the cum out of my girlfriend's tight ass."

And Miyeon simply grins. The promise of that sloppy fucking mess. She's ruined herself time and time again over far less.

"Oh," she says, "you know how good I look with cum dripping down my chin.”

It's kind of impressive how shameless she can be. So fucking blase - what are friends for, anyway.

“Shall we?"

You scoop Miyeon right up into your arms and, upon standing, swing her little body around in front of you. And she knows that's the sort of thing she shouldn't enjoy: being manhandled, told what to do, having someone lift the choice off her shoulders like that - but that doesn't stop her from tangling herself up around your neck and tilting her hips back into you in that playful-fake, overly innocent-cute mien - where she says in this tiny whisper, "are we, you think?"

Your mouth lands on her ear, nips the softness there, "behave yourself, sweetheart."

And then a low, breathless laugh escapes her: "when's the last time that was even an option."

-

(For the record, the answer is never, and you're probably actually so fucked - it's kind of hilarious to look back at it, and think, because how could any two people who have spent as many weeks (months) as you, putting all the right pieces into the right places, get all the stars align at once? The idea that the three of you are hooking up and nobody's getting hurt, murdered or hung out to dry is statistically improbable; and the likelihood that anyone in this presidential suite will survive the weekend without breaking at least four limbs in various places is rapidly dropping with each passing hour. You've been taking the old adage and clutching it against your chest - 

It can't be a sin, if it makes you happy.)

-

Past the door, the first thing you notice is that Sana's hair is all pinned up. Always pretty like that.

However it doesn't change the picture a whole lot. A few inches more bare skin isn't exactly a big difference when there's the whole, naked, porcelain expanse that spans the soft length of her shoulders, along her hips and waist, and runs to her feet. It's still kind of incredible. The hourglass shaped silhouette. All the natural curves finding relief in the right places. Model-esque, that sort of thing. And, yes: her tits, the absolute heaven-sent frame of her ass and those amazing legs.

It goes without saying.

She's there with her back arched, an arm perched on the granite of the counter. So relaxed. An elegance only afforded to the very lucky or the very rich. She lets her head fall back, the fine curve of her chin canting above a neck that you would've been biting kisses into just moments ago if she hadn't put herself in full profile to take your breath away.

"Show off," Miyeon mumbles, and then whispers to you, "sorry. My body can't do that, like-" she indicates - with a weird wobbly hand gesture, about the height of Sana's pelvis. "Whatever that is."

Sana tilts her head forward and meets the glance you give her reflection.

"Hmm," is her eloquent contribution to the airy room, woven into the pitter-patter of bathwater, lapping at the surface. "Now why am I left to wonder why there's no one making good on my requests, huh."

You cross the space; get close. And Miyeon stays curled up against you, doesn't let you slip away as you walk over, doesn't let go. She kisses the front of your shoulder, hums softly.

"My bad," You say. It's very believable. You sound a bit winded; kind of a wreck, but your sincerity shines through in that sort of 'I'll fuck it better' kind of way.

"Excuses, excuses." A dismissive shrug. "The water's perfect. But if you insist," and the sultry drop of Sana's eyelashes is deliberate, an invitation. Her breath is caught as your mouth finds the space between her neck and shoulder blade - the place where she's gone all pink, "I'd hardly pass up the chance for you both to eat my pussy first."

And look: it's not a lie, per se, but the natural instinct for Miyeon-logic is just to provide the justification, "the faster we get you a cumming, squirming, desperate mess-" her hand slips to cup the junction of her jaw and the crook of her throat. "-the sooner it'll be 'til he fucks me senseless again."

"We have a long way to go to get even, sweetie," argues Sana. "Last time, you were both pretty self-absorbed."

"We'd never ignore you on purpose," you whisper into the crook of her neck, and Sana turns to let you follow that deep, velvety mouth as the kiss flows across her lips. "You're absolutely necessary."

"Only by accident, then. That's a little bit worse," snarks Sana. The reprimand dies down into something soft as Miyeon lets her tongue trail flat over a nipple. She shudders.

"If I keep going, maybe you can forgive us?" You watch her eyelids flutter open, a haze of ecstasy passing behind her eyes. You keep an arm at her hip, wrap around and press flat until her whole flat tummy is pinned against your cock.

"Mmm," Sana hums. It's that sultry note she likes to let trail from the very end of her throat. "Ask me again after you get me off. But slowly: I want to savor every detail."

Miyeon traces kisses across Sana's rib until your girlfriend presses two wet fingers to her mouth. Easy.

"Then you should probably do something about her," you say, and - as if in agreement - Sana twists her hand into the cascades of her Miyeon's hair. You lean into her shoulder. She sighs; exhales, deeply, while her back is shimmying further backwards into the countertop.

"And you should help her make it up to me," Sana chimes, her voice clear and melodic, every inflection playing right at home in her vocal cords. "Two mouths are better than one, and I have so many other places you should be kissing."

Sana has a verifiable gravitas, for one, and when she's not hiding in plain sight behind the bubbly-bright act she likes to put on, it's nearly impossible not to fall in line behind her. This isn't to say you couldn't win her over either; it's a pretty small crowd here. But you choose one direction and watch her skin pink up and turn to red; you grab a wrist and it goes cold and white. Every last part of her is so damn expressive. The point is that she doesn't need you to make a fool out of yourself to know you're into her - or vice versa.

(Or. You're such a goddamn sucker, as Miyeon likes to remind you with a scoff, a little eye-roll, and then her hands on your belt. At least, before everything else: the knowing smirk, the dangerous suggestion).

You let your fingers find the backs of Sana's thighs as she spreads her knees apart, and there, you're reminded of the one thing. That of all the ways these two girls are identical, you've never found a comparison that really works. Not by any useful measure.

Miyeon has all the softer features: a bit dainty, the doe eyes and the lone dimple, like a doll with an aw-so-cute factor, whereas Sana is all sharp, clean angles; the sculpted muscle in her calves and thighs, the firmness and muscle underneath - which, yeah, definitely not the worst trade off. Don't get it confused, both girls crave your approval; both prefer when things get rough and sloppy. Describing either as anything but the most submissive holy-shit-take-me-now-I-need-you type, when put under the slightest pressure is laughable.

Not when Miyeon lets you use her like a toy. Or when Sana tells you exactly what you need to do to fuck a baby into her (hypothetically speaking; she gets a little silly and dumb around the edges whenever she's about to cum and her brain starts tripping over her tongue). Neither will hesitate when given the option of having your hand on the side of their throat, pinning their wrists to the headboard or the shower wall, fucking them until they go liquid and collapse in your arms, shivering, whimpering and begging, their pussies pulsing around your cock. In fact, there's really no hard or fast rule at all. But here, you recognize, is a great point of difference -

"Baby," you murmur into the inside of Sana's thigh. You leave a mark with your lips that you’ll come back to. "So. Fucking. Gorgeous-" right as Miyeon starts pressing her mouth against her cunt. "Aren't you, baby? The most beautiful girl. And all of this is just mine?"

Listen - the praise kink your girl has is actually pretty textbook: Sana wants to be called sweet, she wants to be complimented, rewarded, and all that good stuff; she wants you to talk to her the way everyone who sees a flash of her skin or a sway of her hips wants to - the best parts of adulation, arousal, love, without any of the side-eye of it being totally obscured in a crowded venue.

Direct.

To the point. 

She wants to hear each and every you're sexy, you look hot, your ass drives me crazy. She wants it on the gruff in your voice, how it gets a little rough at the edges. Tell me you're mine. You make me so hard. This is just the very essence of who Sana is, and you have learned that you need to give as well as take: feed her a tiny ego boosting here and there, and she will completely throw herself at you in return.

Miyeon watches you run your tongue over her cunt like she’s taking notes, and it’s clear you’re more than prepared to give it all up to her. There's always been this veneration, this reverence for every inch of her, a pull towards her - her eyes, her mouth, her wrists, her long beautiful legs, the place where the skin of her thighs meets - you've always had this insane fascination with Sana, this need to know what she'd taste like or sound like. At any given moment.

"Oh," Sana pushes Miyeon closer, moaning. "Yours. So yours, baby."

The moment you both have your tongues working at her - tasting, the sweetness of her dripping down onto both of your faces, making you lick your lips and kiss each other so Sana gets to watch - Miyeon hums approvingly. Lets out this very performative, "isn't she just the best?"

And it isn’t that you can't find the right word - divine, wonderful, heaven, incredible, without any flaw - there just isn't much room to read into the fact that you and Miyeon are both sunk to your knees on the bathmat, kneeling in worship, in adoration - sucking on Sana's clit. The imagery sells itself.

"We'd never forget the important things," Miyeon continues, dreamily.

She's trading with you the folds of Sana's dripping pussy and the outline of her lips for her thigh. You pick up where she leaves off, and that earns you Sana's hand raking through the back of your hair, pressing you so close you can hear her heartbeat in her pulse; her blood burning through the very spot.

“That's how you make me feel, baby: so fucking good. Amazing." You taste it. You chase it. There is nothing like her cum filling your mouth. "Pretty. Mine. All mine."

“Yeah, okay - sure - that feels really fucking good.” 

Sana's orgasms always start slow; a slight adjustment of her hips, the rub of one calf against the other, she's never been the quiet type but there's not quite the screaming or yelling just yet. Her jaw is set.

"You're, uh-," she adds, failing at anything else.

Miyeon tries for it. That edge of danger; not in pain or frustration, but, "there you go, sweetie: you sound so fucking pretty when you're worked up. Just tell us - the words, we need the words to make it good, baby."

"Fine," says Sana, tilting her head down, breathing deeply, and she makes a sound that's neither a whimper nor a laugh, but a crossroads of both. "Right there, oh my god, you are so fucking dangerous, holy shit. Oh, please. Please. You two- just, please, don't you dare- just a little bit - mmm. Why do you have to be so good at that?"

"Right?" Miyeon laughs out loud - like you're the one missing a vital point, like it's your fault your face is buried in her folds. “I used to think guys just didn’t like doing it. And then, well-"

And you drag your tongue flat and up over her pussy, right through that whole slicked up slit, your fingers still pumping in and out, and then you flick it just hard enough to-

"-yeah," she huffs, panting.

Miyeon presses her thumb into the mess of Sana's cunt, and it causes Sana's whole body to shudder apart - you lift your face to breathe, or to promise, "we can go for hours if you want, taking turns making you cum," before pressing into her again, and Sana's only got so much patience and stamina when you're two steps ahead of the curve, because her legs are practically going to wobble off her body.

"Poor, pretty baby," Miyeon murmurs against her, and she's talking like she’s taken all the control now. Operating in that cycle of push and pull.

And to her point: Sana is whining, gasping - every bit as hot and bothered and needy. She's whispering please and not giving up her requests.

"Fuck. Okay, sorry-” she apologizes. For some reason.

Your nose keeps getting bumped, her cunt is grinding down into your chin. That is fine. If it keeps on like this, your whole face will be soaking wet.

"I'm going to just- going to go ahead and cum, I think- so fucking. Yeah, keep on going just like, shit, please: my pussy is fucking throbbing."

This is the easy part, if you've read the rest right. If the hours and the minutes, and all the passing days: you know which direction the pieces are about to fall.

Sana arches her spine, rolls her hips into your face, and when you swirl your tongue all over the wet heat at her core, the sound she makes is music: low, throaty and delicate. Your mouth is attached to her clit still when you look up over the hand you have steadying each tremble in her diaphragm. And possibly as a sort of vengeful maneuver, Miyeon is shoving two fingers under your jaw and far enough into Sana's pussy that each curl of a knuckle is all that’s left to find Sana cumming right onto your mouth, your chin. 

She wants to scream, to cry out, but her mouth joins her face, in that frozen expression of anguish, of an absolute that perfect pleasure.

"Shh, shh, it's okay," Miyeon consoles, standing up, leaning in - close, really, impossibly close; she presses their foreheads together, murmuring against Sana's ear, whispering what-do-you-need, there you go. Baby, that was perfect. They each know the song and dance. They can shamelessly recite each other's lines. Miyeon slides an arm to the small of Sana's back, one across her shoulders, and Sana leans against her with this gorgeous look of a perfect, mind-numbing orgasm on her face, her eyes bright, her lashes fluttering - a sheen of sweat across her forehead; your stomach falls and bottoms out; you can't not be fucking attracted to these two. Miyeon smooths down her hair, reassuring her. Her hand reaches lower, wraps around her, pulls.

The bath is well filled at this point, water near overflowing, and Sana is equally fucking soaked. This storm of wet and hot beneath your lips. You clean her off with the broad stroke of your tongue and don't spill a drop, because the noise she's making - it sounds like rapture, ecstasy. She's half-delirious, panting, with her hands gripping the sides of your head.

"Where," she gasps, trying her damnedest. You have the best girls in the world, you really fucking do. Miyeon rubs the heel of her palm against the soaked, red hood of her cunt. Sana lets out a sound halfway between a gasp and a groan; the arch of her hips chasing Miyeon's touch; "you, are you two - god damn, if I hadn't already-"

"Shhh. My poor girl. You're not thinking about his cock just yet," and those are Miyeon's slender fingers coaxing your jaw free from Sana's cunt, prying her free from you so she can sit alone at her throne. "They always keep lube in these kind of places," Miyeon reaches into a drawer, fumbling about. It takes a moment for it to register that she's actually talking to you. "It usually looks like some body oil, you know the nice massage kind, in these tiny bottles. Help me look, will you?"

It does not take long - hotel management understands what these rooms are for. The scandal and the romance and everything in between. Because Miyeon finds what she’s looking for in the next drawer down: a sample-sized container of massage oil, something slippery and organic. It smells vaguely of lavender.

"Look at me," Miyeon tells you, and Sana is absolutely listening along too. It's all very seamless: Sana and then Miyeon. All the synchronized parts. Their signals have some sort of feedback even if you're not always actively aware of the things they pass back and forth.

Miyeon guides Sana onto her shaky legs, turns her toward you - So you swallow, hard, and run your thumbs into the crease of her ass - you're kneeling, still, still totally naked and wet all around the jaw. "Eat her ass, and I'll keep her cumming until she can't feel anything else."

You shift your weight and run a kiss along the tender skin at the back of Sana’s thigh. The contact has her bracing a hand on the counter for support.

“And then-” Miyeon says, with a gleam in her eyes like she knows what the fuck she wants. She slides back down to the floor until Sana is pinned between a rock and a hard place. Her two favorite people in the world: namely, your hands gripping Sana's hips, and Miyeon's tongue all over the aching little clit you'd just had your mouth wrapped around moments ago.

"And then?" you provide, hovering a kiss onto the beautiful round of Sana's ass. Her fucking cheek. You have to slap it. Just a little. And when you watch it ripple back and forth with your handprint there, a spot of pink already blooming, well, she has to be giving you a sultry look that demands to know when it is exactly that you are going to stick your cock inside of her, and it is absolutely just impossible to look anywhere else.

"And then," Miyeon supplies, "we're going get that beautiful cock in her ass so you can fuck her brains to mush."

"Thanks I guess, for the explicit permission," you scoff, and here you drop your lips, trail them into the crack of Sana's ass, up and down, teasing the taut stretch of her hole with the tip of your tongue.

"Someone has to take responsibility for-," she pulls on Sana's leg and stretches it forward, repositions her ever so slightly. She sucks Sana's clit into her mouth with an exaggerated sort of satisfaction.

You wait for Miyeon to continue, and then realize with the unshakeable notion: she isn't going to, because it's too damn much trouble. There is no reason to pull apart the premise and not the girl straddled between your faces. The only option is to follow her lead, and to worship Sana. To trace every crevice of her, lick between her ass and the sensitive, clenching heat of her pussy.

"Can we, like, take a timeout-" Sana's mouth is slurring into the skin of her forearm. Her upper thighs are quaking, quivering as you sink your teeth in. Her head's gone all heavy as a slutty little moan rings out and straight down her lungs.

And maybe the realization is setting in. You and Miyeon are going to fuck her until you all can't think - until you're nothing but primal urges, nothing but bodies with beating, pounding hearts; and every thought in Sana's head will be to the two of you; to Miyeon, whose hand finds the front of Sana's stomach and guides her pelvis into rolling forward and grinding into her mouth, to you, with your tongue lathering and lapping at her asshole, and running your hands around her hips until her whole body's shaking, "oh fuck, my god-" 

(The writing is on the wall. You and Miyeon are going to fuck her until none of you know where you end, where the other begins.)

Sana tries again, and the question ends in a deep, rumbling, "don't you want, Miyeon, wouldn't you rather just really, fucking love, having his thick cock stretch you apart," - she swallows - and when she glances behind her back and finds you watching her, there is just pure, unadulterated arousal burning through her eyelashes, over the flare of her ass.

You catch the fucking bow of her lower lip wobbling as she adds, a little more pointed and a lot more determined, "when you're, fuck, begging and screaming for his load? To be his cumdump, his little bitch," it's like she's got her heart set, and her mouth can't stop moving fast enough, and "to do whatever he wants just because it makes you look and feel so damn hot?"

You can hear Miyeon's mouth smacking with the way it works, the way she is swallowing, gasping. You can hear the sound she makes when her mouth goes loose, and says, agreeing, "you're going to love it Sana, every god-damn-inch, you always do" and Sana is falling apart again into your grip, moaning, and then "it's so much better. All the stretch, that tightness. But she needs your fingers first.

You can hear Sana gasping too, dripping a mess into the place where her pussy and ass meet. Miyeon licks a wide strip from her core all the way up and kisses it. Lick. Kiss, lick - her hands pulling Sana closer by the hip - kiss, kiss, lick - pulling her mouth around your girl's clit. So close to the place in Sana's bubbly cheeks, where your mouth supplies long sucks and soft kisses - so close you can practically taste the scented flavor in Miyeon's lip gloss.

"I can't- shit. Hold on, guys," Sana whispers. It's her nails scraping against the granite. "You need to-" and then the loud, dull thwap of her knee knocking into the cabinet. 

She's cumming again - this time, loud and guttural, but another really beautiful sound - her cunt pulsing hard into nothing while the air hangs in limbo, Miyeon's tongue circling her clit, your palms around Sana's beautiful, round ass. You're half convinced they'd be fine with being locked away in some tower. Forget the world and its obligations. Or, rather: let the world stop spinning; leave only this.

There is not much talking from then on. 

Mostly whining, whimpers and pleas to: not stop, yes, there, yes, please, fuck, and Miyeon wraps her fingers around you - almost the same thing she did when you were pumping your cum into her quivering cunt earlier, asking, please, may I-?

Sana bends herself over the counter, like something instinctual. The perfect bend and arch in her spine, the bow of her knees and the press of her thighs. Inviting, pleading. You can feel the tingle, the stiff tension in the muscles, when you reach out and lift her ass; it gives so easily to your touch. Your palm, her cheeks. There's a beautiful flush as the pink starts to run, fade, and reappear along her back, and - fuck, okay, seriously-

Miyeon's there, kneeling next to you: stroking her fingers up your length. She’s kissing you too. It’s hard to think.

But the sound of the cap coming off the bottle comes like an alarm clock, pulling you out of a dream.

Miyeon sits on her heels, smiling into the press of your lips as the bottle she procured tips out. Clear, viscous and smooth into her palm. When it becomes a lot of dripping; she swirls it against your cock - her knuckles wrapped around you, running and twisting into every curve, sliding her whole grip with long, calculated strokes.

"I don't think she's in any condition to keep a tally," Miyeon announces, "so, why don't you decide?"

"Meaning?" you're panting; your brain keeps working to formulate complete thoughts.

"Meaning," she slips her tongue against yours, slides her teeth and draws into your lower lip, "you should totally pound her gorgeously tight little ass" - another kiss, mostly on your lower lip; almost a bite - "and then you should dump that massive load of yours" - a shudder rolls through her shoulder and leaves a whisper in her wake - "right inside mine."

There are about eight thousand words in the English language but what you say is, "fuck."

Because she's right: Sana is blathering the moment you stand up and let your hands reach around, grab hold of her full, rounded hips. She’s not in any state to protest or complain about matters of equality or correspondence. Her lips and tongue are barely even fit to say anything but yes-yes-please-anything, oh god.

Which, okay, whatever: of course, whatever the fuck she needs - whatever they need - you pull at her hips until it's there, your cock sandwiched between those full, warm ass-cheeks, the perfect amount of pressure to get you so fucking hot, and Sana's not shy about rolling her hips to keep you pressed to the surface, rocking into your balls until her cunt's making slick, wet, hungry noises and she's just one endless, groaning moan.

"Love feeling your cock," Sana mutters; and there is a, "please, fuck me, baby- please?" thrown in for good measure.

"Please do, you're like - you're like ridiculously gifted," Miyeon adds, always the right touch of caustic.

"-please."

Sana's eloquence is short lived, because the second you give her ass a squeeze and Miyeon presses her thumb against Sana's cunt, her voice catches on her throat.

She sounds perfectly winded, completely out of breath, a tiny, sexed-up growl running through the notes as she speaks to her reflection in the mirror. Miyeon laughs. She can hardly get her own shit together when you lean up and grab a breast in hand, or start leaving slow-but-steady bite marks along the back of her shoulder blades; like it's all-too funny when you pin Sana to the counter until she starts to beg in that please, please, please tone: when every syllable and gasp is hitched and short.

"She doesn't want gentle," Miyeon tuts, finding her place next to Sana, holding her chin in her hands and catching the expression on her face. She presses a thumb into Sana's mouth for no reason other than: they're so soft. Wet. Pink and full, parted around her fingertip. "Isn't that right, baby?"

Your gaze follows their hips, swaying. And from this angle: identical. The hair, the jawline, the arch of the throat and shoulders, the elegant twist and fold of their limbs, the eyes, the blush, the smile, and the legs. They don't have to look exactly the same: their presence is near identical - Miyeon's the cuter one, sure. It's been established, but fuck, the look on Sana's face as you spread her asshole with just a finger is fucking dangerous. You're going to lose your mind. Both the flat tummies and the beautiful breasts and their matching hard nipples - and the fucking two best asses the world has ever seen. A line up over the counter: Miyeon and Sana, side by side; their reflections looking at you in tandem, wearing these same expressions. The eyes begging, asking and insisting, the pouting lower-lip and the glassy sheen of their eyelashes.

You tell them: "how am I supposed to" - you run the thick-glistening head of your cock along the pucker of Sana’s tight ass, grind your hips into the friction - "focus when you two look at me like that?”

"Um, just give up," says Miyeon, grinning; and then, when your jaw snaps closed and there's the obvious shift of your hips as your length strains through your body's need and pulls you closer to that incredible, tight, dark hole: "god, there you go. That is so fucking hot."

So, it's just like this:

They watch each other. The mirror is right there; every want, every motion. 

And then, yeah, a low and throaty, "is that it?" - Sana nods into Miyeon's hand and smiles, with just the slightest hint of something that could resemble a blush - "why we always come back to him? Because, really-"

"Mmm." Sana hums agreement, dazed and drunk in her words, the slow breath of air you push out of her chest as your cock starts to sink in; the deeper the intrusion, the lower your names become - just murmurs and sighs and sounds: "god, yes, god-"

Her pussy starts to drip onto the tiles, her slick collecting at Miyeon's knees as Sana takes you all the way: and you hold, once you're all the way in; once that gorgeous little puckered rim has stretched around your entire width; there's just the smell of the room; lavender and rose and citrus - Sana's endless arousal - and you hold, and hold on tight - and your muscles shiver as Sana draws the first rocking motion of her hips.

The smallest, lightest grind.

"Jesus fucking christ," you curse, because the heat around your cock is excruciatingly tight. A slow-burning, tingling-aching pleasure as the flesh inside Sana's ass moves up and down the length, drawing out inch by inch of skin - until your entire cock is nearly pulled out.

You're the one that drives all the way back in.

Sana gasps. She runs her hand through her hair. She tries her damndest to remember what words are, clearly coming up empty.

"Baby." Miyeon is kissing her forehead, her nose, her lips, and coos praises in her ear. She sinks her fingers into the curve of Sana's immaculate ass, pulling on the soft cheek, showing-

You are speechless. It's just: that next stroke. And another. Your cock slipping in and out with each pass, so easy once Sana sighs, licks her lips and leans into your rhythm, there, all at once and then faster. And she looks in the mirror, because of course; of course she watches Miyeon run her hand all over her front, the perfect tits and a pretty stomach - your thrusting keeps up until every thrust has her hips rolling forward and snapping back, chasing her own momentum; chasing that thick, hard, stretch of cock and that beautiful pleasure-pain as the force and pace rocks her, pounds her so her entire body has to curl against Miyeon's chest for support, so that she's going a little weak in the knees.

"How is he?" Miyeon's tone gets wicked in these situations, a lot less innocent. She gets excited, giddy. "Pretty, handsome, stupidly attractive," her voice picks up a playful lilt, and she gets you grinning - it's only the start. "And he's all yours. But how's the cock, huh? He's gaping your ass so pretty. Your hole is so fucking open around him. It looks incredible, doesn't it?"

Sana reaches for the side of her ass, presses her fingertips to her skin: pulls and splits a fingernail into the tender flesh where her ass and thigh meet - right above her cunt. You snap your hips into hers and watch your cock disappear. Every motion gives, slurps and sucks until you're hilted inside her.

"Feels, mmmm - fuck." Her chest is fluttering, every part of her so fucking flushed, her blood running beneath the surface so every single inch of her skin is saturated with her own need, her want.

"Feels so good," you growl, your vision gone dark around the edges. Miyeon's there, vaguely, smirking into Sana's jaw, licking at the sweat, scraping her teeth along the skin to bite down, pull- "she's so fucking tight. Gripping the hell out of my cock. Like, it feels unbelievable, you know."

"Babe," she cries, though you give her no respite - you use that little sliver of slack and pull out far enough that she'll know it when your cock is hammering into her ass, a little more aggressive, and you start with quick, hard pumps that echo throughout the room - not for your pleasure or hers: just to hear it, listen, you're driving up so far into that perfect, gorgeous ass that it sends her tits rocking and rolling with every bounce of her chest; her moans, her babbling incoherence, are, again - it's like a drug - and Miyeon's smiling. And also, getting herself off.

"So pretty," Miyeon says into her temple, "with his cock fucking open your ass." And she has her fingers swirling, swirling, in little patterns around her cunt, grazing over a wet clit, like the way you're pounding Sana's ass and dismantling her whole consciousness is absolutely the most arousing thing ever, like Miyeon could stay and watch forever, like Sana's the most beautiful person in the world, and Miyeon would be right here with her every second - whispering praise in her ears - "god, babe, if I could, I would never pull his cock out. You take him so well, don't you? You're just made for it. He could stretch you out over and over and we could, you know - be fucked silly - no thinking - for, like, forever. All day long."

Sana's fingers claw, gripping at the bowl of the sink, while Miyeon has her hand glued to her clit, playing herself.

Miyeon doesn't wait - but she asks anyway - and of course: she's leaning up, in, nuzzling Sana and saying: "yes?"

"So," is all Sana gets out before gasping, because the sight, it's too much to not let yourself feel a little power drunk, and there is a sudden thrust that practically turns the poor girl's voice into a croak. "Yes. Fuck - fuck-"

You don't really have any clue where this is coming from but: "Miyeon, here, take this cock. Come get what's yours you fucking cocktease," and, whatever - who needs thoughts? Your girlfriend's already bent over the bathroom counter, your fingers holding the smooth curves of her ass apart, her beautiful body opened all up and pink.

Miyeon ruffles her hair as she finds the perfect angle, knees knocked up against the drawers, and she's got more oil spread onto her own puckered rim.

You know your girls: Sana is desperate for your cock, Miyeon lives to be used.

"I love how fucking cock-drunk she gets," Miyeon laughs, and then - the moment you've shifted from one gorgeous hole to the other - her mouth slackens, her eyelashes flutter: "shit. Holy - didn't really realize- oh wow."

"Kinda distracting?" you tease, knowing full well you're just going to lose your own words; watching a gorgeous ass swallow your cock; being told to keep giving and take, just as much: the warmth in your own core, your cunt, clenching hard - an aching pulse - the excitement coursing through your veins and this, this whole sensation of being connected: your bodies, all-encompassing and present, three whole units, joining at the hips, being forced back together-

"-you feel fucking, so tight. That's how the fucking joke goes, right?" Miyeon manages: to talk, still, even with a cock in her ass and your teeth and tongue painting pretty marks up the ridges of her spine.

Sana is catching her breath, brushing her fingers through her hair staring wistfully.

"Gives you two so much to talk about."

"Now don't even start- I really like it, alright."

Sana gives her ass the worst slap but your balls hit her cunt on the following thrust. Miyeon's so fucking tight you can barely breath. And her laughter tinkers off into a very pretty string of obscene moans from the way your cock spears into her, all at once: the flat, wet, throbbing sounds of a tight ass taking a thick cock without stopping, stretching and sliding with an increasing ease the longer it goes on for, until you're snapping your hips so far forward they're slapping Miyeon's ass and gripping, squeezing the round shape of her waist; until the movements are just you, the heavy weight of your balls against the hot wet skin between her legs.

And god damn it, she's got to start with:

"Forgot how much you stretch me, Jesus - baby, it is a really gorgeous cock you've got," - and that is when it hits, and her hands fist up, trying to grab at something, anything: "oh my god."

"You are such a whore," Sana laughs, but not unkind, because Miyeon can only grin in response, with your cock pounding out into the red-hot, clenched walls of her asshole. And then: a nice, hearty sigh.

You find yourself asking, almost by impulse, "isn't she, uh, tight. God."

And, fuck: you were thinking how insane it is you two ever managed without the third party. How now, not fucking Sana and Miyeon's glorious, matching asses side-by-side would drive you fucking crazy, and maybe that's why it's really the best news. How when your cock slips out of one ass, and slowly nuzzles into the other - how when you all three watch the pretty faces in the mirror twist and turn into a look of such pure fucking bliss - you just sort of-

"Oh."

That's Sana: with Miyeon pressed chest-first over the marble counter, Miyeon's cheek and nose flush against her face, their arms twisted, bodies crossed at the wrist and wrist - their skin shiny-red with exertion. They're the closest possible position: mirror images of the other, and - with the slightest push -

And it's pretty. It's fucking, you know.

"Perfect," you groan. "This is it. Look at you, the both of you - god - it's like. It's not normal to be as beautiful as the two of you are. Right. So, you know-"

"Hey," Sana is a little faster on the uptake when you're fucking Miyeon and her ass within an inch of dying, "your face. You look like you're close, are you close baby?"

The blood's starting to sing in your ears. Miyeon's forehead keeps bouncing into Sana's - their sweat, mixing, her skin peppered and blotchy pink from where she's gotten a little bit lost in her own head, her hips moving of their own accord, her body tensing, relaxing. You can read all of her movements, recognize her signals: the way she moans louder than usual, the way her cunt trembles against you, the way her ass squeezes, holds, lets go-

You pull out. Just to keep yourself from blowing, just to pull on your balls, to look and watch the perfect view. And Sana reaches back - a warm hand wrapped around you.

You feel her palm wrap around your cock, coaxing another serving of oil - like she knows just how rough it's going to be to start again.

"Just," she pants, leaning into Miyeon so you have to rut around to find your way back, "until the end."

There's something so pleasantly mind-numbing about the moment when you ease your cock into the sweet-soft ring of muscles again and she's just stretching and pulsing and grabbing all around you. The way you keep going: she's holding herself, giving her asshole a squeeze, a stretch - her lips kiss a sound onto the side of Miyeon's shoulder and she nods, gasps, breathes out heavy and pained, like the rest: a total fucking rush.

You watch Miyeon lean further, a beautiful shift of balance between the two. Her hands clamp around the sides of Sana's thighs for support, and the longer you pound into her, the deeper your cock sinks, the closer the pressure becomes as their heads turn in, looking to the same place, their foreheads knocking, and-

"Knees," you growl. You're holding your cock in your first - demanding: "Get on your fucking knees."

Sana smiles first. Then Miyeon. And when the lipstick smears against their cheeks, you don't have it in you anymore to think clearly. The line between your imagination and your fantasy is so blurred: you want their mouths moaning into eachother. You want Miyeon to clean the taste from Sana's lips. You want those cunts grinding, their clits making contact, and for one of them - fuck-

So: "I need the both of you."

And it's your name falling off of Sana's tongue when the tops of her shins hit the tile floor - she's kneeling, she's pulling Miyeon by her waist until the three of you have converged into this beautiful, glistening, open-mouthed trio. Sana kisses Miyeon hard while you cum all over the image: the contrast of their soft, wet, hot tongues against one another while your harsh grip pumps along your slick, throbbing length. It feels like a knot unraveling, a tension snapping loose, your cum landing on their cheekbones, their temples, between their lips - It's a long, slow roll through the valley of your abs - Miyeon licking into Sana's panting mouth and swiping through the streak of white you just pumped out into her fucking hair; the messy collision of lips, swallows, tongues; the faint, slow sounds, the slickness-

"Look," she breathes. You can hear the way their words hitch when their fingers hook eachother, guiding through the mess across their skin, dipping through the sticky cum, circling the plush pout of their bottom lips; and it's Sana that grabs Miyeon by the wrist, bringing her hand forward; sucking, running her mouth in a lazy path all across the width, "that's all, fuck, I need to. Wanna taste all of it."

You just groan.

Miyeon is slumped into the lacework of Sana's limbs, swapping the tastes between her tongue and the space of their breath; while her own thumb caresses the raw, stretched opening of her ass. Sana whispers things, incoherencies, into Miyeon's hair: kisses at her temple, strokes the muscles of Miyeon's back. Feeling how they shiver, they heave, they fall - exhausted and flushed in the heat of one-another's embrace. She licks the words across Miyeon's cheek and follows with her nose trailing Miyeon's jaw, and your cum's smearing a streak onto Miyeon's bottom lip, before their tongues have tangled themselves into another messy, well-fucked kind of collision.

"Good girls," you mumble, kissing Miyeon's knuckles, and helping Sana to her feet.

Your legs are a lot less shaky than either the two of theirs, but it's okay, you pick Miyeon up and set her on the sink; and then turn on the tap for the both of them, since they'd need a wash and some salve.

"Now, what?" says Sana. She's smiling; a washcloth at the ready; some dribble of soap from the bottle.

Miyeon gives her a smirk from over her shoulder, turning away just enough to flip her hair; the ends brush across her jaw. It's a cute little quirk of the eyebrow; the upward twinge to the corner of the lip; it's a motion that knows every muscle, every detail.

"Depends," says Miyeon, sharpening up her tone just the littlest bit, "the bath looks like a tight fit for all three of us but," and there it is - the mischievous glint; the curve in her hips, her mouth, and, of course - you notice the way her eyes drop to the stiffness of your cock. The way her voice purrs, all light, but a lot more intent: "Did you see the shower? It's absolutely gigantic."

"I saw the detachable head," Sana throws out. A teasing little comment, one you remember - that sends a pretty deep shudder down your stomach and thighs. Your cock twitches, hard and - okay, good thing Miyeon booked the room for a week and then some. The view is pretty great: watching your cock get rock-solid in under five seconds. Watching them kiss the same knowing look, sharing the private joke. Watching their hips swing, watching them slide the glass door: Miyeon in front and Sana from behind.

It's in unison that they both turn over their shoulder and ask, "won't you help us test it out?"

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be right there." You shake your head, "so thirsty," even though, you know you're equally to blame.

-

It's that tiny whisper of "don't look at me like you don't have cum in weird places either, hm?" that Sana gives you, while Miyeon is washing her hair, rubbing and sliding along the locks. "I'll help you with the spots that are hard to reach, come here."

It's that little, meaningful, mischievous curl in Miyeon's lip when the water's pouring, and your breath falls across her skin. The way her hands reach out for you, even when Sana takes her chin and plants a firm, messy kiss across her mouth. It's the same gesture Miyeon's making, using Sana's forearm for support. How she runs the palm of her other hand along the back of Sana's thighs, slipping and pressing forward to guide, nudge. She pulls Sana onto her toes, aligning their bodies. It's in the little laughs they share, the wet smacks of lips, the soft little hums they make when tongues slip over, into the open.

It's here too, that you first ever get them confused, just a momentary slip up of "Sana, could you grab the towel-" or some equivalent, when you glance away at the perfect wrong moment and you're left just a little puzzled, still mostly entranced by the sight of the steam on the glass and their fingertips drawing patterns into it as they lean in for another kiss, or a moan-

"Oh," Miyeon says, delighted, "I'm supposed to be her, right?"

They're fucking-

Sana is less enthused. "Stop. I do not. Am not."

- identical.

"Look, I didn't mean-"

Miyeon laughs to cut you off and skips the argument. She winks, and somehow that makes it worse.

It's there too, the look of regret when your fingertips curl into the skin of her breast, your thumbs a tease against the rigid nubs of her nipples and the texture of her pretty stomach. They don't realize how much you really love their matching expressions. So, they don't mind the mixup, and besides: you just follow Sana's guiding hands and let your lips ghost-kiss, so gently across Miyeon's thigh. It's impossible to imagine a version that isn't one and the other, the two of them, here, with you: sharing kisses, offering the gentlest, slowest exploration, teasing and tugging a gasp of a response.

"Hey," Miyeon muses, "does that mean you'll keep your cock warm in me once we go to bed and feed me a steady stream of ice cubes between all the sessions, mm?"

Sana raises her head in faux offense and drops back into the comfort of Miyeon's thighs. "Jeez-us christ," Sana huffs; "one day with him and she thinks she's me. Have mercy."

"She isn't?" you ask.

Sana sighs. "Um. Not even close."

Miyeon beams at the both of you. She even runs her fingers through Sana's hair, doting - affectionate. "She'll come around to the idea eventually, don't worry. Until then I'm more than happy to take on the role. It can't be that hard, yeah? Just to be all - naughty-sexy-sweet-oh, look, a surprise, i’m actually ready to get fucked six ways to sunday-"

-you get an eyeful of whatever they are doing, this time just, fucking-

Sana only says, "it'll have to take an exceptional amount of patience on both your parts."

-gorgeous, lewd, completely fucking filthy.

"I got a lot, babe."

The second Sana opens her mouth, it's followed with: "pfffht."

It's just, who wouldn't give them whatever they want? Whatever they ask? There's a list out there: no doubt the both of them, gagging. Throat-deep. In their little skirts. Panties. Naked and straddled, just, across their hands. One, maybe. Or both all the same, or still a different preference. One behind the other and taking turns. Something - and this is important, here:

"Look," they say, eyes wide up at you and blinking - on the same fucking beat no less, "you can trust us, okay?"

(Gentleman and distinguished scholars: the list, by the way, only ever gets longer.)

[butchsophiewalten]

FINDJACKWALTEN 6/29/23 UPDATE #2 WALKTHOUGH

Findjackwalten updated last night! To properly understand the content of this update, you'll probably wanna check out these other posts on the 6/27/23 update: [HERE] and the 6/29/23 update #1: [HERE] if you haven't seen them already.

This one's a fucking Doozy. The main page has updated to a full on Jack Walten Takeover.

Most of the existing page has been put under a red filter, and images of Jack and Rosemary (cut off in this screenshot) Walten have appeared. The 'page under construction!' text has changed to read "CLOSED PERMANENTLY. (effect:072074)", the second half of that being the date Bon's Burgers shut down. The play button present in the site's previous incarnation is still here, but now plays various Christmas carols, rather than Battle Hymn of The Republic, starting with Silent Night.

The "CONTACT & INFORMATION" button that became clickable earlier in the day still leads to an unchanged /0714-74 page.

The "MEET BON!" button that also became clickable earlier in the day leads to a /mynameis-bon but with Bon himself now missing.

The most significant update has been to /caretakerlibrary, which now contains four new audios from Richie.

Our first new Richie audio, Richie 3, is titled "AUD06-27-74opnn-nights" meaning it's dated for the 27th of June, 1974. The "opnn-nights" referring to it being the night before Bon's Burgers opening day. I've roughly transcribed this audio as follows:

Another day, another dollar, as they always say! Sorry- sorry, dude- just ignore that, I don't know- I don't know what I was doing, okay, uh, forget it. Yeah- yeah! Uh, tomorrow's the big day! You excited? Uh, Boss gave me some instructions to give you for today. So, uh- get those in a second. Uhm, I needed to- wanted to say I uhm, I put the chairs down. That, y'know, next to the tables, so uh, just- save you the hassle of having to do tha- having to do that tomorrow morning, so you're welcome. Uhm, uh, if you can, keep an eye on the uhh, the- whatchamacallit, Poker maze? It's, uh, pretty easy for kids to get lost in there. So, y'know, just, don't want anything to- anything like that happening. Just, uh, y'know, pop in like every minute or so, just make sure there's no kids crying, screaming, y'know. Actually, don't get lost in there yourself, either. You're still a teen, right? How old are you again? That's- doesn't matter, whatever, you'll be fine. Uh, don't worry about it. Unlock the generator room, uh, clean the bathrooms- especially the men's bathroom, more on that later. Uhh, right, right, right! Uh, keep the main stage curtains closed. Uh, for the time being, we uh, we transferred Sha to the secondary stage for this week, so she'll be next to Boozoo. The uh, Bon animatronic won't be performing this week, uh, he's uh- they- they gotta do an extra week of maintenance on him. So, that's a shame, but nothing we can't fix. Uh, luckily we do have a- uh, a costume! A, uh, Bon costume! Uhm, the uh, sister company gave it to us a while ago. So, y'know, if you wanna earn some, uh, extra bucks, you might wanna pop in that thing. Dance around, tell some jokes, whatever. Uh, Felix will probably tell you what to do, they're kids, they're stupid anyway, they won't notice. Uhm, just- try ignore the smell. Right, uh, that, uh- that reminds me. Uhm, uh- apparently, uhm, apparently some employee might've, uh, might've been, uh. Smoking pot. In the men's bathroom. Uh, so, uhm, just, just- um. Y'know, don't mind the smell, if you, uh, keep the windows open, just try and freshen up the place. Uh, make sure Felix doesn't notice. Uh- I- uh, wouldn't want whoever that was to, y'know, get in trouble. If, uh, if they did smoke pot in there, which I doubt. But, y'know, just in case. So, uh, yeah! That's it, goodnight.

The next audio, Richie 4, is titled "AUD07-01-74BCKSTG-DAY", meaning it was recorded on the 1st of July, 1974. I've transcribed it as follows:

Hey man! Okay, so, uh, we got some good news, and some bad news. So I'll start with the good news! So, uh, Boss is happy! He said we did good work- said we did good work on the first week. You did a good job with the Bon costume actually, I was surprised. I actually got it all recorded on film, so, uh, if you want, I can show that to you next week. Or, I could use it to blackmail you at some point in the future? Kidding, kidding, kidding. Uh, nah, I wouldn't do that. Uh, um, oh yeah, uh! I bet you're happy to hear: Bon will be back on stage by tomorrow! Yeah, uh, Felix set it up himself, so uh, maybe they worked out their differences after all! Sorry, just, trying to make a joke. Um, right, ah, okay onto the, uh, the not so good news. Uh, so, um, we- uh, we have a- um. We have a associate. I- uh, I believe she does the, uh, art for the restaurant. Um, she's been coming in a lot lately, she keeps going on about like, her, uh, husband or something. She's not well. Um, to put it lightly, I- I don't wanna sound mean, but. She, uh, there's something wrong with her. And, and uh, I- I believe you know her? Uhm, like, um, you've been talking to her whenever she comes in, um. I- I appreciate it, I appreciate it, right? Um, and I'm glad you are, y'know, helping her. Uh, but, mmn. How do I say this? Um, she's been- uh, she's been, uh, let go out of the company yesterday, and uh, so, it's now a company policy that if a former employee makes any sort of drama inside the restaurant, uhm, they'll be permanently banned from entering, so. Uh, if- if you see her again, tell her to keep quiet. It's, um, Boss' orders. Uhm, I'm sorry if that- I'm sorry if that's insensitive, um. Okay. Okay, uh, lighter note: nobody got lost in the maze! So, good job! Uh, you're a natural! Or whatever. Uhm, uh, okay, on with the, uh, bad news, I guess. More bad news, uhm. The backstage is now locked for the week. Um, I asked staff for explanations and they refused to elaborate, so um. Ba- uhm, Banny will be off the stage for a few days, uh, so, keep the curtain on Banny's stage closed. Uhm, what else? Oh, uhm, all of the, uh, animatronics must be sent to the men's bathroom at night, instead of backstage. So, uh, yeah! Uh, let me know how you've been. Um, I had a blast last week. I will say, uh, you make a really good cook! I'll tell you that. So um, yeah, see you tomorrow then. Goodnight!

The next audio, Richie 5, is titled "AUD07-12-74LLY-NIGHTS", meaning it was recorded on the 12th of July, 1974. The second part of this title likely is "Lily nights" and refers to Lily's birthday party. I have transcribed the audio as follows:

Uh, hola amigo! Is that how you s- is that how you say it? Agh, I never knew how to say it. Uh, yeah! Uh, good things are happening, my friend. Uh, the- the backstage is still locked. Uh, but! The, uh, the generator room is where we sh- should be, uh- should be keeping the robots for now. Right- uh, we actually, uh, we actually have a new one. Uh, agh, what's the name, what's the name? Bob- uh, Bobby the clown! Buh- buh- Billy the clown! Billy- ah- yeah, Billy. He, uh, just arrived yesterday, actually. Um, top of the line technology, man, I'll tell you. I- I was messing with their, uh, little radio thing all day. Uh, Bon seems to be working fine now. Uh, his- his, uh- his gloves keep falling off? Like, uhm- not gloves, uh, what- what're they called? Uhm, blue hand thing- y'know, the suit, uhm. And it's revealing the mech underneath. Uh, so just, uh, be careful with like, the hands and stuff. Okay, whatever, uhm. The, uh, oh yeah, we have a birthday party coming up! A birthday party on the, uh, the tw- no, uh, fourteenth? Yeah, the fourteenth. Uh, we're going to be using the, uh, Billy robot. It's actually, um, the daughter of one of our associates, uhm. Augh, what was the name? Forgot the name, doesn't matter. So yeah, uh, we gotta m-make it look extra good, okay? Uh, I might even come over, y'know, show up in the Bon costume myself. I dunno, we'll see how it goes. Uh, well, if you show up, actually, we could, y'know, stay smokin' in the arcade area? You smoke, right? Ah, whatever. Um, yeah! Look forward to seeing you there. Take care, man!

The last audio, Richie 6, is titled "AUD07-20-74CLSD-MRNING", meaning it was recorded on the 20th of July, 1974, the day Bon's Burgers shut down. Transcribed, it reads as follows:

C'mon, man, where the hell have you been? Some big shit happened, alright!? Whuh- we're- we're sh'down! It's fucking bad, dude, we are SHUTTING DOWN! We're DONE! We're fucking DONE, Alright? Augh, god, I- I- I clocked in last night, right? Some staff were still in the restaurant, right? It's all good, it's all okay. FOUR IN THE MORNING, I get a call from NORMAN, right, telling me the cops BROKE INTO THE PLACE, right? Some call about, like, SCREAMING inside the fucking restaurant? Whole neighborhood was freaked out. They- uh- they checked the place, most doors were locked so they just shrugged it off, anyway. There- there's nobody inside. But, uh, Norman's shutting us down! He said the- the- the scene it caused is humiliating. Alright, everyone's outside the fucking restaurant, claiming that somebody got killed! It's fucking BAD, man. Agh, he gave us, uh, THREE DAYS, we have three days to shut everything down. Ugh, sorry, oh god. Sorry, it's been a fucking crazy night. Uh, there is, uh, the bo- sorry. Uh, the Boss came up with a new plan, alright? He hasn't shared it with CyberFun yet. But, uh, long story short, we gotta take all the fucking items from this place and put them in a truck and take 'em to the storage place somewhere. Tha- he didn't say where. It- uh- it's BIG fucking money, dude, alright? It'll only take a few days. Uh, you in? Also, uh, just for the record, don't- don't tell this to anyone, okay? See you tomorrow, then. See you tomorrow, man. I'll be there at six, Bon's.

Revisiting the main page, the new Silent Night audio contains a peculiarity that might go unnoticed.

If you listen for long enough (a little more than four minutes), you can hear backwards text-to-speech audio overlaid on top of the end of The First Noel. When reversed, this speech can be heard as such:

Transcribed, this audio reads as follows:

"[We] here at BSI apologize for the confusion regarding the shocking scene from last night. Apparently, screams for help were heard inside our installations. Thanks to the help of the Brighton police department, this has been confirmed as a hoax and that nobody has been harmed inside our restaurant. Nevertheless, for budget reasons, we are shutting our doors until further notice. Thanks for joining us on this small adventure. Kindly, the Bunny Smiles family."

[johnnylandslide]

Day 5: Stamp

“Dear Cid Garlond, thank you for the refined adamantite, and for your help with the Ragnarok’s engines,” Aurora said as she etched her quill across the letter in front of him. “How’s that?”

Alphinaud leaned over. “It’s the right sentiment, certainly, but it’s a bit direct. When writing thank-you notes, it’s better to not be excessively brief. How about I would like to extend my heartfelt thanks for the aid rendered to us from Garland Ironworks during the recent crisis?”

Aurora nodded, picked out a new blank piece of paper, and did her best to transcribe the words Alphinaud had just spoken. About halfway through, she forgot exactly how the second half had gone, and turned back to him for advice.

“How did you do that?”

“Do what, sorry?”

“Come up with a line like that just off the top of your head,” Aurora said. She hadn’t learned to read Eorzean script until she was at least Alphinaud’s age, and she hadn’t read many books since then regardless. Flowery language and epistolary communication had always been Alphinaud’s wheelhouse, but they’d never been Aurora’s.

“Oh, that,” Alphinaud said with a short laugh. “In truth, it’s just practice. I first started writing like that when I wanted to curry favors from the instructors at the Studium, but it was also a skill I used regularly while working as a Scion.”

Putting the thank-you cards on hold for a few years until she could write like Alphinaud seemed like a bad idea, so she didn’t mention it. She wasn’t sure what the next step should be, though.

“How should I come up with them myself, then? I’m not sure if I’m up to the task,” she said.

“That’s nonsense!” Alphinaud said. “I find it hard to believe there’s any task you’re not up to, to be quite honest.”

“I’m up to tasks that involve fighting, and I’m good at finding things, but it’s always other people writing the letters and doing diplomacy,” Aurora sighed.

Alphinaud had a sly smile in the corner of his mouth as he thought of his objection. “What about the Dragonsong War? I seem to remember you doing just as much of the talking with Vidofnir as anyone else. It was much the same with the Mol when we were at the Azim Steppe.”

Her apprehension began to fade as she considered the examples he’d brought up, and as her expression softened, Alphinaud’s smile only grew wider. “That’s true, I guess… What about letters, though?”

“I don’t believe you would think so lowly of your letters if you knew just how much my mother treasures the ones you’ve sent her,” Alphinaud said, staying on the offensive. “Many of the letters we’re writing today will likely receive similar treatment, as well. You have a lot of friends who would doubtless be overjoyed to have your words written down in a note they can reread whenever they like!”

“Well, when you put it that way…” Aurora said, slightly embarrassed.  The number of people she’d identified as helping with the Ragnarok and thus needing thank-you notes suddenly seemed intimidating. She picked the quill back up, staring down at her still-blank paper. “I’ll give it another try.”

“Full glad am I to hear that,” Alphinaud said. “And don’t hesitate if you want me to read any part of the ones you’re writing. I can check for spelling, and add any of that ‘flowery language’ if you’d like!”

Aurora nodded to psyche herself up, and once again put pen to paper. “Dear Cid Garlond, thank you for you and your company’s help during the Final Days…”

[romanceandshenanigans]

Regency Romance Update: September 20th, 2023

Why does life stuff always happen all at once? Here I go and start to finally have some momentum on this thing and I spend the next several weeks spending my days off dealing family obligations and a root canal. I need a vacation in the woods for at least a week where I'm not expected to see anyone or do anything.

Anyway, exhausted rant about living under capitalism out of the way, the WIP.

I have gotten some more scenes half written in my notebook, but haven't had real time to transcribe and edit, so no telling how many new words I've got. Mostly I've just been jotting down ideas for scenes to go into the second act and draw out Finn and Juliana rebuilding their relationship.

So far I've got a scene where Juliana confront an Anti-Stradfordian and Finn basically has to pull her out of the room before she tears the man's throat out. The use of dance to reflect the state of Juliana and Finn's relationship. A scene where Juliana dresses as a man for a play and Finn clocks how much more comfortable she is in men's clothing. Need at least one scene with Finn coming out of a lake. And plenty of back and forth between them fixing the play together.

I've also decided Finn is working on a drama, which he is not having a good time with since most of the stuff he writes are comedies with a guaranteed happy ending. Queue discussions on Finn's pessimism towards happy endings in real life vs. Juliana's fundamental belief that at the end of the day the universe will look after her.

In general I've got a better sense of the internal progression of both characters. In any given scene Juliana is running the gambit of human emotion meanwhile Finn is so consistent in his pining he's reached a state of zen.

Oh, and I'm finally starting on some spicy scenes, as a treat.

Thanks for your patience y'all. Here's a snippet for your troubles.

He turned his head to find Jules engaged in some conversation with Robert.

She was in costume, full men's attire from her well worn boots to the working man's cap on her head. The sleeves of her loose fitted linen shirt were rolled up the elbows while the dark green vest hung confidently undone. Her hair was hidden from view, buried under the cap so not a stray curl escaped. These were simple tricks he had seen countless times on a number of actresses, but never had the image rendered him so in awe.

More than the clothes themselves, she held herself differently. He knew her to be naturally athletic, something she often hid with careful movement and the compulsion to make herself smaller. Now she allowed herself to stand tall. Her weight wasn't being pulled up by some invisible string but allowed to sit on her bones be be part of her. The curves of her body were strategically hidden while her lips and eyes allowed just the peak of her femininity. He was left with the impression of an androgynous youth ready to lead him to the nearest glen and never be seen again. He'd follow her gladly.

taglist below the cut

@clairelsonao3, @auroramagpie, @janec23, @steh-lar-uh-nuhs

[seishun-emergency]

on tsukasa and don quixote, (transcribed from my insane discord rambles so apologies if it isn't coherent yet. i plan on writing a full essay about leo + tsukasa + don quixote allegories once i'm done rereading checkmate). under a readmore bc this got longer than i expected and . no one wants 3 paragraphs of don quixote analysis

tsukasa compares himself to don quixote and the windmills. screenshot not found bc i'm . so past that point now and i was reading at 1 am last night that's why i didnt write it then. basically, the windmills is one of don quixote's first (+ most iconic) 'quests' on his journey to become a knight wherein he thinks these giant windmills are many-armed giants, tries to fight them, and gets. horrifically injured because these are windmills and not actually mythical beasts. also he's an old man that kind of sucks at being a knight. the point of the windmills is that don quixote's warped perception of reality due to his archaic values causes him to act foolishly and get physically harmed as a result with nothing to show for it

it's a good use of that allegory in context!! like REALLY good i need to think about it more but. it's a good way to represent what tsukasa is talking about in that passage, which is how he clings to the archaic values of high society in a way that makes tori pity him. not entirely a 1:1 because tsukasa IS approved by the society around him but its within a bubble and i think the point is that the way tori chooses to live in transgressing those norms and values calls to attention how tsukasa can be foolish and blind to a version of reality + his own desires in the quest to adhere to these archaic values and get the apprival of the people around him. it's a good use of it. approved from your local guy who likes don quixote a bit too much

the other thing that i liked about it (and this is why i said i need to reread checkmate) is that it also positions tsukasa similarly to leo, the person who gets allegorized as don quixote in checkmate. considering this is in requiem (aka . The knights succession story and where tsukasa shows proof of his maturity and growth as well as literally takes over the position of king that used to belong to leo) it's . smartly done. really smartly done. i really want to review my old thoughts on checkmate + don quixote and how they stack up now because the. second book of don quixote as it relates to leo could be interestingly applied to tsukasa as well (especially with the running theme of maturing/realism/growing up that surrounds the repayfes stories and the disenchantment/disillusionment/"maturing" that don quixote goes through in the second half of the book) but i don't have enough to say from that lens as of right now. tune back in for an essay in like two months i guess

anyways. if you read all this i hope u had fun. i regrettably care a lot about don quixote

[kaylakat2]

sharing some old (done a little over a year ago) doodles of my boys from my personal sketchbooks that have never been shown off. But I might as well since I still like them. (some of these are cropped by the placement, but I didn't want to make this longer than it's already gonna be so click each if you'd really like to see this old art properly.)

so, time to do what I always do, introduce what each thing is and dump as much info as I can about these guys (because my brain is full of minimum 15 years of their stories and I need to put it somewhere)

First two sketches are still some of my favorite moments with these two actually, because I am very soft for their dynamic before the big bad of the (to put it in basic terms) zombie virus outbreak happens. This whole scene occurs while the two are still working at the live in facility where the virus was created. Feel free to read the dialogue if you can (it's not well organized at all) but I won't be transcribing it as it's not really something I feel compelled to share about these sketches. Basic gist is Marcus hates to wake Chase up, since neither of them wants to get out of bed, so he does it as gently as he can; with a whisper in the ear and a soft kiss on the cheek. Work calls though, so they both need to get up before someone comes looking for them. (and y'know, catches them fraternizing in the workplace)

Second two were from a beach trip sketch page where Marcus visits a beach for the first time in years. Chase lived near the cost growing up and would visit the beach every time he visited home (which mostly meant in between usually years long research jobs) so, forgetting how special it can be, he's a bit charmed by seeing Marcus so excited. They do all the traditional beach things and eventually do the thing I always remember doing at the beach (even though it happened pretty rarely), and sit down for a sandwich and some relax time in the shade. Chase is also doing what I really need to do more often; wearing contacts and sunglasses and a rash guard, to keep from doing what I do every beach trip, getting severely sunburnt.

Both sketches take place pre-marriage on their timeline, which I often forget to explore in my more polished art since a good year and a half of it takes place during times when Chase was closeted and they were stuck at work, or during a virus outbreak which Chase is ruining himself trying to fix. Both cases, not the stuff I usually like depicting for these guys. I also explored a lot of the outbreak itself in the roughly 40 thousand words I wrote of their story, so a lot of it is territory I've already covered.

[ID: four pencil sketches of the same two characters, a short man with glasses and a tall man with curly hair and a beard. The first two sketches show the two men on a bed, the shorter one laying under a blanket with one arm over his head, a content expression on his face. The other leans over him looking at him with a kind expression. He leans in and gives the other man a kiss, with the other man smiling, eyes closed. The other two sketches depict the men in beach wear, one where they're walking together and talking, holding bags and a phone. In the other they're sitting under an umbrella on a towel happily eating sandwiches wrapped in paper. End ID]

[mangacat201]

WIP WEDNESDAY

Coming back with a new snippet of the Eddie vs. bondage fic, since I managed to transcribe most of what I've written so far and add some today in a truly unprecedented amount of daily words (for me) rn. This is a bit later than the Teaser Tidbit, but introduces my OFC whom I'm very excited to get to know better. Tagged is who interacted with my first post, which I've pinned now, so if you'd like to be added to and updated, interact with that one, I guess. OK, here goes nothing:

Upon closer inspection, it reads “The Sphere” in a gorgeous cursive neon-light script, but there is no bass hammering from inside the walls that would point towards a run of the mill dance club. His feet make the decision for him before his head catches up. The entrance opens into a short stairwell that goes down in near darkness and then leads into an open space bar that has Eddie stopping dead for the second time tonight if for vastly different reasons.

This… is definitely not his scene.

It’s all read and burnt orange indirect lighting, exposed bulbs and retro shades that give it the vibe of a prohibition speakeasy with a modern twist. The centrepiece is a gorgeous mahogany bar and the booths set back into the walls are decked out with velvet of such a dark shade of burgundy, it looks black in the shadows. There’s a reasonable number of patrons around, but it’s not terribly busy. In his ordinary jeans, t-shirt and khaki jacket combo Eddie feels… not underdressed precisely, but just slightly to the left of what seems to be the norm here. It’s almost enough to make him turn on his heel again, but the few eyes that glance his way sweep over him without judgement and a stubborn little voice in the back of his head tells him to <i>stop fucking running already, it’s embarrassing.</i>.

It’s a bar, they serve alcohol, presumably, which is what he’s looking for right now – that, and a little quiet. So he makes his body move, sits down on a barstool at the far side and orders a shot of top-shelf tequila just because he can and after having thrown it back, tells the bartender to make the next one a double, which he plans to stretch out into a good couple of hours of wallowing.

Eddie has been slowly sipping at his glass, shoulders a little hunched and vaguely people watching through the mirror behind the shelves of alcohol for maybe not quite an hour as the bar has filled up around him. Still, his fuck-off-vibes have been strong enough that nobody has approached him so far.

“That drink looks like it’s got a long story attached to it.”

The voice drifts in over his shoulder and Eddie feels himself involuntarily snap to attention – the impulse still not trained out of him by almost a decade of civilian life – as a body slides onto the barstool next to his. The woman isn’t touching him, not even leaning in. Still, her unbidden presence is somehow too close for comfort. Eddie debates ducking lower over his drink, pretending he hasn’t heard, but at the same time, the sudden attention creates an itch to be present somewhere that is not the inside his own head at the same time.

He turns his head just enough so he can take in his new companion – gorgeous, full auburn hair, (which has kind of become like a red rag to a bull for him, but hers is darker, shot through with flecks of brown, like fall leaves), laugh lines settled around her eyes and graved into her cheeks that put her maybe a decade and half ahead of him. Not the usual kind of LA beauty, but with a spark in her expression that draws you in. She looks at him curiously, clearly aware he’s just as likely to turn down her offer of conversation than take her up on it, but also telegraphing that she wouldn’t judge him either way.

Maybe it’s that kind patience, maybe it’s the need to tell <i>someone something</i> of what a shit show his life is right now underneath it all, but that he’s trying, god, he’s trying so damn hard to keep it together, and…

“Have you ever done the right thing, but it sucked so much going down that it feels like it’s coming back all the way around to being the wrong thing again?”

The woman leans onto the bar, half turned towards him, lifts her eyebrow and snorts:

“Oh boy. One of those ones, huh?”

Eddie sinks down over his glass, momentary impulse to share already depleting.

“I’m sorry, you’re definitely not interested in wading into my mess, trust me.”

“Oh, I beg to differ. I’m definitely interested. See, I love to delve into people’s stories. Pull on each thread until the knot slowly unravels and you get a sense of what the whole tapestry might look like. Or put it together into a completely new picture, who knows… And you”, she circles the finger of her free hand at him, “look like a particularly interesting knot.”

@911onabc, @monsterrae1, @rewritetheending, @giddyupbuck, @bahorell, @pirate-hunter, @spn20freak

[dzpenumbra]

2/5/23

I'm a bit behind schedule tonight. What a weird day. My sense of time just... doesn't exist right now. Maybe it's a grief thing. Time is just... so odd. Like today somehow feels like the longest day ever, but super short at the same time. Just massive distortions. The vet visit feels like just yesterday, but like... a week ago. All at the same time. Really hard to describe, very disorienting.

This morning was a bit tough. I spent a lot of it in bed. I kept waiting for my cat to poke her head around the corner, or to hear her meowing from downstairs. That was really fucking hard. I watched a VoD from a streamer I've been watching for ages now, since like... 2016. He's a storyteller, I'm watching his playthrough of Subnautica: Below Zero. I'm interested to see what he thinks of it. I played it in beta, so I don't even know the full ending, the story wasn't complete then.

I did yoga. I struggled with keeping my thoughts clear a lot. Some days it's like... basically just my breath and the poses, occasional random thoughts passing through and detaching. But today it was just a torrent of thoughts. Very chaotic, and a lot of tough grief ones too. It was a challenge, for sure.

After, I noticed the kitchen was a fucking warzone. So I cleaned and sorted the recycling and did a load of dishes. Which, for me, is a really big thing. Especially at a time like this. I'm very proud of myself for that. I took the opportunity to put away some of Max's food, medicines and her old dish. It's hard. I want to leave them out, because like... they're hers. I don't know. Like... it's really soon or something. But at the same time, I'm afraid having them out is just upsetting me. I'm trying to pace myself with that. It takes me a titanic amount of time to process loss, any loss, and I have to do it at a very gradual pace. I get very overwhelmed with those feelings very easily. Trust me, I am no stranger to loss, I know my way around this feeling pretty well.

I went and filled out the doctor's forms, luckily I got a head start on that like a month and a half ago.

I spent a good chunk of the day transcribing drums, and learning and recording guitar parts. I'm doing a cover of Stare Into The Abyss by Between the Buried and Me. It's fun, it's not too complicated (by their standards) and I absolutely love the hook. It's a really powerful song that... I felt compelled to cover when I heard it while driving back from the vet. I don't really know how I'm going to do the vocals, to be honest. I haven't really gotten that far. I can sing quietly, I'm sure, but like... I think screaming is off the menu. XD I guess that's an opportunity for creative interpretation, yeah?

Covers can be tricky, you want to do the original justice, but I kinda want to add more flair to it, put my own spin on stuff, more than just swapping out some instruments or whatever.

I have about half the guitars recorded and learned the second half, I should wrap that up tomorrow. Then I need to figure out what to do with bass. I have a 5 string, I have had it for ages, but I don't know shit about like... intonation on a bass. If I just ignore that and just tune it, all I'd need to do is transcribe/learn the song, set up a digital bass amp and hit record. Honestly, it's pretty doable.

I haven't really recorded music, at least analog instruments in this way, in like... god... close to 10 years. It's so fucking crazy how quickly the time just... vaporizes. Like, I remember trying to get my ex to learn bass, teaching her Chlorine & Wine by Baroness so we could play it together, hoping to record it. I did a weird experimental hip-hop album with my brother in one month in... spring 2019? Maybe? Before that it was like... scattered orchestral pieces I was making with VSTs. Before that it was... vocal covers? In like... 2014? When you "take a few years off" more than once... a decade racks up real quick.

I cannot even put into words how... at home it feels to be recording music again. Like... all I want to do is make more now. So I need to make sure I see this one through as far as I'm intending to take it. VST strings, guitars, drums, bass, clean vocals and then... let it sit until I can figure out what to do with the dirty vocals.

But what's really grabbing my attention with this music stuff is the idea of doing a song that isn't a cover, doing an original. I have never in my life had recording equipment this functional. Software has always been pirated, thrown together piecemeal, scavenged. The mixer was always broken as shit and had a buzz to it, the mics were always beaten to shit, the amps were all from like 2003. Now? Now I have a legit copy of Cubase. I have a Focusrite Scarlett which isn't like... studio-grade, but works perfectly for what I need it to do. I have a nice condenser mic from streaming. I can line-in my guitar straight into the box, no older-than-highschool-graduates amp needed. I pop open Cubase, I load in a digital amp, and... it works. And I play, and it sounds fucking good. These are legit the best recordings I've ever gotten with guitar, ever. By leaps and bounds. And the digital amps are free. Crazy shit.

Unfortunately, I really can't play drums here. The noise would be unbearable for my downstairs neighbors, I guarantee it. So I'm programming drums, but I got a MIDI controller - a little 2 octave keyboard with knobs and whatnot - so I can actually play string VSTs and stuff, instead of doing it all with the mouse.

I'm excited to see what kind of music I can make when the process of making music is this streamlined. It used to be really janky because not only was the setup shit, but my recordings would all be off by X amount of time because of latency or some shit I didn't understand back then. So I'd have to align all the recording takes individually by hand. It was tedious and laborious. This? This, I just record and play it back. I can switch between instruments seamlessly. I just... I have a good feeling that some pretty cool music is coming down the pipeline pretty soon.

I made some dinner and talked to my mom. It was good. She's burnt out. I'm a little worried that her taking on a supportive role for me is... a bit much, especially in addition to her other obligations. I've been a little worried about hitting her with secondary trauma. I'm new to the concept of it, and I understand it very well from first-hand perspective now. It's just tough to be on the other side, and be actively grieving, and have to like... watch out for the other person potentially re-traumatizing themselves by taking on your trauma. But sorry, that is not my responsibility.

I urged her to - very gently, compassionately and... delicately, but still truthfully - seek out dog training. Her dogs are lovely, and I don't just say that. The female is a bit of a depression case and the male is... basically a very very very big puppy - in good and bad ways. She has always been concerned (read: deathly paranoid) about running into other dogs in the woods, and I was raised with that mentality, which was very hard to get rid of. I just grew up in a home where dogs aren't allowed to play with each other, they just retrieve balls, do obedience exercises, chew bones and sleep. Because we always had one dog in the house, and no friends who had dogs, I guess. You can't blame people for not being aware that there is a world outside of their known paradigm, you know? And I broke those shackles in 2018, and I'm so grateful that I freed myself from that restrictive mentality before my dog died, so she had an opportunity to meet other dogs and play before she passed. My mom is still stuck in it, which isn't surprising, because she taught me. But my way of paying it forward - try to gently help her learn what took me years to develop from scratch. Get over your military police-dog style training and teach your dog how to be a dog. Teach your dog how to socialize with other dogs.

I likened it to me. The hermit coming out of extreme isolation, going up to a complete stranger and going, "HI YOU ARE MY BEST FRIEND NOW DO YOU WANT TO HEAR MY LIFE STORY?!" That's what a dog who doesn't know how to interact with other dogs does, in my experience. And you never know what another dog's overwhelm reaction to that is going to be, how they're going to interpret it. They don't necessarily have bad intentions, in fact... I'd honestly say they rarely have bad or defensive intentions, in my personal encounters. They just don't know how to express themselves, because they never get a chance to practice. So I really urged her on that, because she lives right at the base of some really nice hiking trails and she avoids them like the plague because people bring their dogs up there a lot. That would make her life so much more active, full of nature, and would bring so much joy and social stimulation to those lovely dogs. Whether she follows through with it is her path to walk.

Then I just played some Risk of Rain 2, which is fun. And here I am. Nearly midnight, and need to be up at like... 7. Fuck. K, time to try to sleep. If I pull this off, I might come out of tomorrow with an appointment for my ADHD screening, which has been 20 years in the making. But, at bare minimum, I should at least be set up with a GP for the first time in a decade. Yay!

[notesanddreams]

Gaster’s Motif Throughout Chapter 2

I’ve been long overdue for some Deltarune musical analysis, and I’m pleased to present my findings for Gaster’s motif and its appearances in chapter 2. If you haven’t read my analysis on chapter 1, you can find that right here if you’re interested. Before we get started, I would just like to remind everyone to not take these things too seriously; music is filled with silly little coincidences all the time, and the presence of a similar melody doesn’t always mean that a character/scene is connected to our favorite mystery man. I am a simple music nerd presenting his findings. With that said, let’s jump right back into it!

What is Gaster’s Motif?

If you haven’t read my chapter 1 analysis or simply need a refresher, Gaster’s motif is derived from the music file “mus_st_him.ogg”, otherwise known as Gaster’s Theme. The transcription reads as follows:

If you’ll remember from last time, we decided to define Gaster’s motif as simply “starting tone” -> up a minor second (half step) -> up a perfect fifth. 

In chapter 1 this motif appears all over the place, from the starting track of Another Him, to the ending track of Don’t Forget. I find it very suspicious. But I’m pleased to report that chapter 2′s OST is STILL chock-full of this mysterious motif.

The Noelle Connection?

This was the first time I noticed the motif making a comeback. In the track “Girl Next Door” we’re introduced to what we would probably consider Noelle’s theme for the first time. It’s an adorably cute track, but what’s this I hear? A mere 17 seconds into the track you can hear the bass come in with same sequence as described above: up minor second -> up perfect fifth. D Eb Bb.

(I’ve marked the notes in question in red to make it easier for you)

We can hear it once again on the second phrase at the 0:28 mark.

If that wasn’t enough for one track, Toby introduces it AGAIN in the main melody on the synth bells at the 0:38 mark.

So now we have a strange situation here that we didn’t necessarily encounter in chapter 1, right? The Gaster’s sequence is... INSIDE another character’s motif. And the above melody is DEFINITELY one of her motifs, because we encounter it in (almost) every track associated with her.

The opening bars of Lost Girl? Check.

Ferris wheel at the 0:19 mark? Check.

I say this complicates things a bit because, well...

It’s in Queen’s motif as well.

The Queen Connection?

The sequence appears right off the bat in the track named Queen, in the harpsichord melody.

Welly well well. This puts pressure on me because Queen’s motif appears in at least NINE tracks that I counted. You guys aren’t gonna make me do all that transcribing that’s essentially the same melody, right? No, sorry, I’ll just list the songs and the timecodes that the motif appears.

Queen: 0:00, 0:09

A Simple Diversion: 0:00, 0:14

Smart Race: 0:01, 0:07

Cool Mixtape: 0:00

Elegant Entrance: 0:00, 0:19 

Pandora Palace: 0:20, 0:30

Attack of the Killer Queen: 0:00, 0:13

Giga Size: 0:30, 0:46

Knock You Down (Kinda): 0:09, 0:59 (It’s Queen’s motif but it uses a major 2nd and major 6th instead of a minor 2nd major 5th)

The Secret Bosses Connection

If you’ll remember from my chapter 1 post, we discovered that Jevil’s theme(s) also contains Gaster’s motif. A lot. Upon hearing some of the tracks associated with Spamton, however, I find myself coming to the conclusion that this is instead a motif dedicated to secret bosses. At the 0:54 mark in Big Shot, it’s pretty undeniable that this is the same melody used in The World Revolving.

Dialtone also bears resemblance to the bridge section of The World Revolving, and once again utilizes Gaster’s motif.

(Please bear in mind that the keyboard in Dialtone is detuned roughly a quarter step)

Knowing this now, we may be able to assume that every future secret boss will use this theme, which also strangely uses Gaster’s motif. Won’t be able to confirm this until the next release, however.

Lastly, the City

As the city of Cyber World looms in the distance, we’re greeted with an upbeat track named “A Cyber’s World?” But did you hear anything in the melody at the 0:32 mark? 

The melody returns in Welcome to the City at the 0:12 mark.

And Just a Small Bonus

I thought this was kinda cool, but not really mega noteworthy. The sound effect that plays when you enter the castle town each time? It’s called snd_him_quick. What’s cool is it’s the same chord heard in the choir part of Another Him.

^ snd_him_quick

^ Choir part from Another Him.

They are simply chordioids made up of root, minor 6th, octave.

Interesting. Very interesting.

Conclusions

Gaster’s motif can be part of OTHER CHARACTER’S motifs. A Queen and Noelle connection could be very possible. There’s almost DEFINITELY a connection between the secret bosses and Gaster’s motif. Maybe a connection between Gaster and Cyber World? Who knows. And finally, the chord from Another Him could be something to look out for in future OSTs. Do with this information what you will. Have fun!

[ninak803]

Letters (XV)

I'm soooo sorry, this took me so long. So sorry. But it's here now! There are already two more, that only need transcribing and editing, so hopefully that won't take me weeks again.

@whataboutmyfries I love you. Thank you.

Characters by @lumosinlove, except Inés, she's miiine. And I love her, haha.

Dear Kasey,

You didn’t know. And how could you’ve known? Don’t worry, I really don’t blame you for being angry with me. If it was the other way around, I would’ve been furious, so please stop worrying.

Finn is okay. He keeps telling me that he’s perfectly fine and that the concussion didn’t affect him, but I know better. I went to one of his games last week, and he was different on the ice. More careful, less reckless. I know he’s going to be okay. He just needs some time to be his usual self again. But who am I telling this? You know how it is after an injury. I keep telling him that he should take it slow and that he shouldn’t push himself too much. He told me I sound like our mom. Idiot. I don’t. But I swear I could hear him rolling his eyes at me yesterday when I talked to him on the phone. He can be so annoying, but, man, I love this little dumbshit. But as it seems, I’m not the only one telling him to slow down. I told you about his teammate, Logan, didn’t I? I knew I could trust him. He’s watching Finn for me, and I’m really glad he does. (Finn isn’t)

But that’s enough about my little brother.

So! I had my date with Inés. (Mind the little accent on the e, I didn’t know how to write her name in the last letter. I learned that she’s half Mexican and her name’s the Spanish version, so it has that cute, little accent. The more you know.) Turns out, she’s incredibly smart and hardworking. She studies chemistry in New York and when she talked about her research, I had absolutely no clue what she was saying. She figured out pretty fast that STEM isn’t exactly my topic and broke it down, so I could grasp what she was talking about. If you’re curious about her research, you have to ask her yourself, because there’s no way I can tell you about it that does her work justice. So, sorry Kase.

We went out and met for a coffee at a lovely café she knew. Afterwards we went to Strand (You know, the book store where I took you several times) and… I lost her in it. I swear she was next to me and the next moment she was gone. It took me almost ten minutes to find her again, with a stack of books under her arm. But she looked so happy when she told me about her new “treasures” (her word, not mine). I have to remind myself not to take her there any time soon. She spent money she didn’t have on freaking books. (She’s a full time student, working as a part-time bartender, and our educational system is so fucked up that she has so much debt already, I hate it). Inés had to go back to class afterwards, but she agreed on meeting again soon. So I think I have a second date!

To be honest, the second date maybe should be a bit more romantic than this one, shouldn’t it? I’m not exactly the romantic type, so I’m open for any advice here. We had a good time though, at least I did, and I think she did too.

Wow, I’ve talked a lot about her now. Sorry about that. It’s probably not very interesting for you to hear about my dating life. But then you asked, so deal with the details now.

You want to go for a run with me when I visit you, huh? Sounds good to me, you know I love a good run. It’ll be like in the “good, old times” again, except that we won’t be running through NYC.

I’ll call you when I’m booking my flight, so we can coordinate everything a bit.

I’m excited to meet Natalie. I have high expectations  now, you’ve been saying so many good things about her, and I’m really curious. But she can’t be too bad if you like her. (You know I’m just teasing you.)

Have to go now,

Alex

[pinkandgreenarepurpleandyellow]

Semi-coherent ramble on Skull leadership

Ok so retroactively I take back my 'Kevin is an og' hc, the way they talk about him in Silent Night just doesn't add up with that.

To start with, there's this bit.

Now, notice the following details: a) there's no proper confirmation that he'd "been blooded" (whatever the hell that means, I'm assuming some more official type of fight), and he's sent three kids the infirmary (I suppose four, given the guy they're currently beating up at that point in the story). Why is this relevant?

It's established that pretty much everyone long-term has a decent record with fights. Now, it's also mentioned that Donovan has a few scraps under his belt with the Leopards

but there's also this very specific bit that stands out to me. Donovan is a self-described "nobody" in the prison because he's not affiliated with any gangs. At the same time, it's established that the gangs are frequently fighting until the cave-in, so it makes sense that after five years, Donovan still has significantly fewer fights than the average gang kids would. (Background it's established that one of the newest Leopard recruits already has several knife wounds on his face, despite being new enough that Donovan has no recognition of the kid).

So why does Kevin, so frequently described as a psychopath, and also the guy who is second in command at the main gang, have such a low kill/maim count? Two options:

He's a coward. Not impossible, but pretty unlikely, especially given how Ambrose backs his violence most of the time and it's canon that even the Skull leader himself fears Kevin's bloodlust.

He's relatively new.

Given the combination of rumors and position, I'd pin his arrival sometime in between a month and half a year ago. The low kill count would suggest more recent arrival, but position and the fact that there could be plenty of non/semi-lethal fights also factor in and probably give at least a few months. This may also explain some of their interactions.

Why does Kevin join the Skulls then, if he's new and extremely violent? Why not just kill whoever he wants?

Probably because of the above bit. Most of the tough kids join the Skulls because as tough as one guy can be, he can't really hold against a whole gang (Solitary gives us that 50 or so inmates went for the break and most of them were Skulls, so factoring in the ones who were there in Death Sentence the gang's numbers are ballpark low-mid 30s minimum). Kevin would probably have joined from both that and the fact that as a Skull, he gets to unleash that violence on other inmates.

Now I turn to Death Sentence for pining down a second Skull's rep. Specifically, Bodie. (Note: For this part, I do have the book with me and open to the pages, but I'm too lazy to type out the full quote and low-key I'm not sure I am even gonna be able to transcribe word for word bc I have not been sleeping "healthy" amounts.)

Bodie is established right off the bat in book 3 as a respected inmate when he manages to kill the entire prison riot's urge to off Alex and Simon with exactly one shot. The fact that he's "standing between [Alex] and the crowd" (174) to do so puts him directly into the line of fire (including from his own) and establishes his stance quickly. All of the inmates stop immediately and back off when he says they'll answer to him for killing the two.

The very next thing we learn is that Bodie speaks with "a lazy drawl that nevertheless carried an icy authority," (174). Silent Night had established that Kevin has a notoriously short temper and frequently targets the new fish.

(Brief tangent, but this for me adds to the theory that Kevin himself is fairly new here. He hasn't been around long enough to be respected properly by the old-time inmates but he can intimidate them with violence and cow the new fish into submission early on so they think he's always been here and always will be.)

Bodie does not do that. He doesn't need his lieutenants to grab anyone, or to yell directly in someone's face, to get attention. His phrasing is also decently important here, cause he establishes he understands what the others are feeling but that Alex and Simon are not to be hurt.

The fact that over a hundred inmates, many of whom are down there for legitimate crimes (Silent Night's epilogue establishes the framing of the newest inmates is a contrast to their usual intake) are all listening to Bodie almost instantly is a sign of actual respect and not fear. Fear would have been them ignoring the shotgun or simply killing Bodie and continuing their destruction.

Past that, there's the thing he says right after Alex misses on the first hit.

"You want another shot or you wanna let the professionals do it?" (183). Now that's not a great time-gauger, but Alex was in gen pop for I believe six weeks minimum (approx 1 week pre-first blood watch, about a week between that and the 'a month at most, if we're lucky' line, and then the month of prep) so I'm guessing 'professionals' means several months to years worth of experience, probably at least a year given that it's primarily gang kids working at the door in the moment.

The other big time marker I have so far is the unofficial funeral Bodie gives to the dead Skull and Fifty-Niner. "Knew them both from the street, soldiers then and always," (195). The odds of Bodie having known two different guys from two different gangs on the surface, and recognizing them if they were sent down at different times are low, as are the odds of the three of them ending up in the Furnace around the same time for any reason other than a gang war. When was the biggest gang war, you ask? The Summer of Slaughter, aka five years ago. At a minimum, this gives the knowledge that Bodie knew both of the inmates for a while, long enough to consider them men instead of kids and to remember them on the street, so it makes the most sense to think he's an og.

During his speech, there's the iconic bit we all remember about the them that say being the ones who get ended by them that play. But right before that we get " 'Yous all know the rules of the street,' Bodie went on. 'Well, those of yous who're in here 'cause of the game, that is," (211) which seems a helluva lot more like a line from someone who was involved in the game than an audience member.

Now with all that in mind, why did Ambrose choose Kevin as a lieutenant?

I'd say there's a handful of factors but the two biggest ones I can think of are dynamic and bloodlust.

Typically the best way to balance out leadership is actually contrasting personality. If one person is reasonable and the other is barely restraining their bloodlust, it's surprisingly effective as both an intimidation tactic and as enforcement. I have no doubt that if Donovan had pissed off Ambrose, he would have sent in Kevin.

Bodie and Ambrose are a bit too similar in the sense that they're relatively laid back, although from the descriptions we get of both (admittedly rather lacking) put Ambrose as a long-time fighter and violent person. But he's still more laid back than Kevin and putting the most insane kid available as his second-in-command adds to Ambrose's power more than Bodie would have.

(There's also the possibility that Ambrose didn't trust Bodie not to plan a coup or try to manipulate him, and thought that he'd be safe from that with Kevin but we never see them interact so this is complete speculation based solely on the line about how Bodie's been waiting to use his ability to persuade people of shit in the Furnace.)

But with all that being said, there is the possibility that Kevin joining wasn't just protection for him, but for Ambrose as well. From the way the events in the kitchen and the chipping room go down, Ambrose's offer to Donovan is based on both Donovan's potential use for the Skulls and the potential danger he could bring to the gang. Even if the kid standing up to the Skulls dies, it still sends a message to the other inmates of weakness.

Now instead of Donovan, who usually keeps to himself and avoids trouble with the Skulls when he can, substitute Kevin. There's a decent chance that he would have killed at least some of the Skulls, with Ambrose especially at risk as his cellmate. Inviting him in is a power play, placing Kevin under Ambrose on the hierarchy but still giving him a high position and relative authority. The intended outcome was most likely that Kevin's bloodlust would be redirected and Ambrose's position would be safe.

I suspect it's the conversations Ambrose has with Donovan in front of Kevin that changes this outcome.

Why would Kevin not want Donovan in the gang? There's a handful of reasons.

To start with, Donovan's an old-timer who already has an established reputation, even as a "nobody". Add in that it was his "idea" to off the Leopards via cave-in. Multiply by Adam and Ambrose having a certain level of passing familiarity (best guess would probably be they got along well enough in juvie but the slaughter crossed a moral line) and Donovan being big enough and strong enough to put up a good fight, even if he's overall a pacifist.

Kevin's thoughts are probably that Donovan joining shifts the dynamic. Ambrose would trust a prisoner who's been here longer more than he would Kevin, and Donovan has no bloodlust to speak of and prefers to avoid fights. This could mean loss of both power and violent outlets for Kevin.

Factor in the atmosphere of the Furnace. No one trusts anyone else properly. Friendships don't really exist most of the time. Everyone puts up a constant front to hide weakness.

The tree in Adam and Donovan's cell isn't just a little holiday thing, it's them pulling down the front and being vulnerable. Ambrose being even a little swayed by the tree is a sign of weakness. A sign that Kevin doesn't particularly like either way, and probably doesn't appreciate that it came from the same guy that Ambrose is already offering a place in the Skulls to, more than once. This could mean some major shifts in dynamic but more importantly, this weakens Ambrose's image in Kevin's eyes and therefore also weakens the respect and fear.

Clearly, the simplest way for Kevin to get things going his way are to kill Ambrose and take over the Skulls, who are unlikely to want revenge for that because of Furnace's rules about strengths and weaknesses. (The same reason they don't bother getting revenge for Kevin when Gary takes over). People who were here longer than him still know he's not above murdering all of them and new fish can easily be bullied into fear and obedience. (Separately, the way Ambrose and Kevin's beatdown of the new kid is described suggests that the usual hazing happens more naturally in the first few days, not with a welcome party the way Kevin did it, but that's also me really reaching so take that with some salt).

Then, why bring Bodie on as his lieutenant?

Probably because Bodie now balances the loose-canon and sanity dynamic. Bodie can handle messages, negotiations, and general maintenance and Kevin is free to keep up his reign of terror. Plus, Bodie's been in the Furnace for a long time and probably was an og Skull, so him obeying Kevin as leader (and not just as Ambrose's lieutenant) cements Kevin's new status.

Then, after Kevin is gone and Gary is gone and a decent chunk of the Skulls went off into Room Two and bit the bullet, who do the remaining Skulls turn to? The guy who's been here the longest, has some experience with being in charge under his belt, and isn't about to repeat Kevin's torture bits or Gary's full on psycho routine, ie Bodie.

This got really away from me but to sum up the concepts of my theory (tldr):

Kevin gets put as Ambrose's lieutenant despite being relatively new because a) it makes Ambrose look more powerful and b) puts Kevin firmly on the Skull's side.

Kevin obeys Ambrose while Ambrose is still sufficiently "strong" and the things he does/lets Kevin do are agreeable to Kevin.

Between the offer made to Donovan and the softening up around the tree, Kevin now thinks of Ambrose as sufficiently weak. It's easiest to kill Ambrose in his sleep, so Kevin does that.

With all of the lunatics gone, Bodie is now in charge in no small part because at this point everyone just wants relative normality and Bodie isn't constantly torturing people or insisting on killing for no reason, but can still maintain authority as an og inmate.

Two other bits of Silent Night I ended up using for references (aside from the ones above):

But yeah, this is my new lame-ass overthought concept and I have put waaaayyyyy too much faith in my ability to comprehend throwaway lines accurately

[wigglesforsquiggles]

@hecksee you asked and enabled this thank you

also sorry i'm on mobile so i can't add read more feel free to scroll past quickly

so basically 2 days ago i was like: hm ive been wanting to see how insane lewis hamilton's career has actually been,, but i'll need to compare it to others

however, this is more complicated than it looks, due to the point scoring system in formula one changing drastically over the years, from a 10,8,6 system to a 25,18,15 system, causing drivers in later seasons to seemingly do much better than all time greats.

so i decided to use the wikipedia articles from each season to see hamilton's result from each race from 2007 (his debut) till 2021 (last complete season), and recording the points he scored using the 2021 point system

this took like 45 minutes bc manually transcribing 17-22 races worth of points over 15 seasons, having to check which place gets which points takes some time. luckily i got quicker overtime, and can now see 4th place and go 12 points instantly

i then did some fancy excel calculations to work our the adjusted points total for each season, and the average points he scored per race in a season.

then as a bonus, because i was wondering what effect the summer break had on drivers, i calculated the average points scored from each race in a season (i.e. 1st race average X points, 2nd race average Y points, etc)

I then repeated this with Sebastian Vettel and Max Verstappen (all three world champions), to see the similarities and differences with them.

This took around another hour, as Verstappen has only been in 7 seasons compared with Hamilton and Vettel's 15

Then I decided to see how many DNFs (did not finish) each driver got per season and overall - again harder than it sounds as i recorded both dnfs and no point placements as 0 on the spreadsheet. I had to go back with wikipedia and manually check which entries were no points, which were dnfs, and which were dns or saw (did not start and disqualified).

Now i've decided to really go all in, and add other drivers like Rosberg and Button (similarly both wdcs) and further compare stats. I used the same methods as stated above, which took only around half an hour - a combination of speed from practice, copy-pasting my template, and Rosberg only being in 10 seasons.

during this, I started to create a seperate sheet full of ideas, so i can come back to them later. One of these was creating on of these for Micheal Schumacher (seen as the goat of f1), comparing his different eras (defined by me)

Once again, i used the same methods as above, this time splitting his stats into 1991-1999, 2000-2006, and 2010-2012, adjusting the points scored and finding averages and totals.

Ive stayed up till 4am consecutively doing this, purely bc my brain enjoys doing this. I'm not listening to any music or watching anything, i'm just sitting there typing numbers onto my computer enjoying every second of it

[marshmallow-phd]

Nine Little Letters

Genre: College AU, Fake Dating AU, To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before AU

Inspired By: This graphic made by @rcse-tvler​

Pairing: EXO x Reader

Summary: Just when you thought life was done shoving you down, it got much, much worse. After finding out that your latest crush was already in a relationship, you did what you always did when emotions ran high: you wrote a letter. Signed and sealed, you put it away with the eight other letters you’d written to past one-sided loves, never to be seen again. That is, until a mix up accidentally sends those letters out to their respective recipients and you find yourself in the middle of one confusing web of love. With fake relationships, insecurities, and revelations swirling around, things are bound to get a little messy.

Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I 11

This was the worst kind of humiliation. Standing there on the sidewalk staring open-mouthed at the one person you were excited to see today, you were crumbling into a million pieces. And no one even noticed. That was what made this humiliation so bad; there was no one to witness it. You were breaking and no one cared.

You should have known better, really. This morning was going too well. You had woken up on time, had a delicious, filling breakfast, and had managed to put an outfit together worthy of any Pinterest board. Your confidence was through the roof and you were going to do the one thing in your life you swore you would never do.

You were going to confess to your crush.

Signing up for math tutoring was the last thing you wanted to do. Who in the world wanted to spend their valuable free time learning more about equations and algorithms? But you needed to pass this class. It was the second time you’d taken college algebra and the thought of taking it a third time made you want to crawl under your bed. So, you buckled down and took the walk of shame into the math lab. (Yes, that was an exaggeration. Everyone knows there is no shame in getting help. Didn’t mean you had to like it.) When you got the call from your assigned tutor, you ignored it. You didn’t like talking on the phone to anyone let alone a number you didn’t recognize. No voicemail was left. Then a text came through.

Hi, (y/n)! This Kim Junmyeon! I’ve been assigned as your math tutor. When you get a chance, let me know when you’re free so we can create a schedule that works for you. Have a great day!

You waited an appropriate amount of time before replying. So, an hour and half later, you texted him your schedule and made a plan to meet up in the library the following Thursday. You marked that day on your calendar with exactly zero enthusiasm. In your head, this Kim Junmyeon was the cliché nerd from movies: dorky glasses, snort-like laugh, and clothes that looked better on a grandfather. Oh, boy were you so happy to be wrong.

Sitting down at one of the tables by the large, ceiling high windows, Junmyeon was nothing like you’d imagined. He had a sophisticated aura about him. He dressed nicely, a thin long-sleeved shirt over a patterned button down, the collar laid nicely over the top of the shirt, and was blessed with sharp, handsome features. You knew you were in trouble. But you didn’t care. You sat down at that table eagerly, ready to… learn.

For the past month and a half, you’d met Junmyeon twice a week to go over the lessons and work on the assignments. By some miracle, your grade was actually going up in the class. Somehow you were able to better comprehend the material and secretly fawn over your tutor simultaneously. At this point, you were sort of feigning how much you weren’t understanding to keep the tutoring sessions going. The nice thing about algebra, once you understood the basics, everything else built on top of it.

But today – today you had decided that you were going to step over the line from tutor and student into the realm of perhaps something more.

You liked Junmyeon. You liked his math puns and the way he scrunched his face when he thought hard about something. His lips would pucker whenever he lifted the sheet of paper to check over your work. Each time you met up with him your heart acted like it was in the middle of a NASCAR race and it was determined to win. You had it bad. This wasn’t the first time you’d had a crush like this, but you had set your mind on making this one different. This time, you wouldn’t hold it inside. You were going to be the brave one, the bold one. The fact that birds were tweeting as you rode your bike onto campus should have been a sign that things would only be downhill from there. Unfortunately, like the optimistic idiot, you took it as a positive instead.

After locking your bike up, you headed straight for the courtyard near the pond. Junmyeon had told you that he often spent his mornings there to finish up homework or to read a book (the fact that he read so much was another factor in your liking of him). In your head, he was all alone, flipping through a novel as he leaned against the trunk of a tree, looking like a prince taking a rest in the shade on a warm summer’s day. The water would be glistening in the background as a lovely, lighthearted melody played softly through the air. He would see you approach and smile that wide, brilliant smile. Your heart would skip as you sat down in the grass next to him and poured out your feelings. The daydream turned into a nightmare the second he came into view.

Junmyeon was not alone nor was he sitting under a tree with a book. He was on one of the benches, splayed out on the wooden beams with his head resting in the lap of a very pretty, more his league type of girl. She laughed as Junmyeon told a story. A delicate hand ran through his soft brown hair. Your heart fell to the ground, forming a crater at your feet.

Shoulders slumped and day ruined, you turned and headed for the student union. If today was going to suck like this, then you were going to sprinkle it with an overly sugary coffee drink. Preferably with extra chocolate drizzle. It helped - a little bit.

Your morning classes went by in a blur. You were certain you took notes, but none of the information sank in. Later you would have to transcribe your quick scribbles to a word document to help you study. You would learn the information then. By lunch, you were starting to peel yourself off the sidewalk of humiliation. Especially when the one person you could always rely on joined you for lunch.

“How did it go?”

You remained silent, continuously munching on the sandwich in your hands as your best friend sat down across from you at the small, two-person table near the middle of the cafeteria.

Baekhyun laughed his signature, SpongeBob-like laugh. “That bad, huh? I told you not to do it.”

“Technically, I didn’t do it,” you corrected. “He already has a girlfriend.”

“Ouch.”

You nodded. How could you not see this before? Did he mention having a girlfriend and you just blocked it out? Junmyeon and you talked casually between math problems, about your friends and fun things you liked to do on the weekends. He’d failed to mention one very important detail.

“Well,” Baekhyun reached over and plucked a potato chip off your plate and plopped it in his mouth, “at least you found out before you said something. I told you he wasn’t worth it.”

“Just because he has a girlfriend doesn’t mean he isn’t worth crushing on.”

“Okay. Whatever you say.”

You rolled your eyes at him. “You’re so much help.”

Ignoring your quip, Baekhyun snatched another chip. You smacked his hand, but all that managed to do was break off a few pieces, the crumbs falling to the table. Smiling proudly, Baekhyun popped the half-chip into his mouth. “So, are you just going to go home and write a letter?”

“Are you just going to go home and write a letter?” you mocked with a scrunched face.

Byun Baekhyun had been your best friend since the two of you had met in the first grade. He’d stolen your popsicle that your mother had packed as a special treat for your first full day of school. When he saw you start to cry, he broke off the piece he’d been sucking on and handed the rest back to you. There was a bit of a disagreement on the level of nice-ness that act achieved since it was your popsicle to begin with, but somehow it caused the two of you to be inseparable ever since. Being your best friend meant that he was privy to the more private parts of your life.

Like the letters.

Starting as young as ten years old, you’d developed a bit of a tradition when it came to your crushes. Emotions were hard to process, but you found them easier to work through if you thought about them and translated them into words. Those words would fly across the paper, transferring the feelings that made you both laugh and cry into the graphite that formed them. Not to mention, the act made you feel like the heroine in a rom-com. Certainly it was something that Meg Ryan or Rachel McAdams would do once they realized how they felt about the male lead.

The first letter you ever wrote was during your final year of ballet class. Dancing had been a part of your life since you were three, but a new passion had been discovered so you’d decided to quit after this last cluster of classes. A terrible decision, really. Because right after your mind was already made up, a new boy had joined the class.

Kim Jongin.

He had just moved into town after his father was promoted to a new position and had to transfer to headquarters. You’d never seen him at the park or the grocery store before. He was completely new. And beautiful.

He was blessed golden skin that glistened, shining brighter the longer he danced. And, oh, the way he danced. It was well beyond what anyone else could do. His movements were fluid, water-like, as if the very beat of the music were pulling and manipulating his limbs to convey what the notes had to say. Each move was a word and when he formed them together, they could make you smile or cry. And when he smiled… oh, his smile was like starlight. The kind of brightness that stayed in the sky even as the city lights flickered on. To this day, you’d never found one that could rival it. He was a dream that every composer coveted. So, what was your young heart to do?

Well, the movies told you to confess. But there was no way you could find the courage to do so, especially since you only saw him in class and you couldn’t confess in front of everyone. The only other option was to write it out; to write it out like Jane Austen pouring her heart out for Tom Lefroy.

 Dear Jongin,

I’m not sure how to start this. Do I compliment you on your dancing? It’s nothing like I’ve seen before. Prima Donnas in the Russian Ballet would be jealous of you! But you probably hear that all the time. And about how handsome you are, even under all that hair. I can’t help but watch when you pull it back for class so you can see yourself in the mirror. Why can’t I look like that? I somehow ended up looking like a frizzy wet cat that just climbed out of the tub.

I guess what I’m trying to avoid saying is that… I like you. A lot. I like your laugh and your wide smile. I like how much you love music and how you interpret the melody with your moves. No one can freestyle like you! My heart does a dance of its own whenever I see you. I hope you don’t have anyone that you like, just so I can stand a chance. Would you ever think of me like that? If not, it’s okay. I just needed to tell you. Someday, you’ll be on stage dancing to an audience of thousands and I’ll be right there in the front row, cheering you on! Until then, I hope you always find happiness in what you love.

Love,

(y/n).

 That sentence about watching him on stage made you cringe in hindsight. Cute for a ten-year-old, but a bit stalkerish. Luckily, though, you never gave it to him. You chickened out every time up until the last class. The idea of him opening it and reading right there in front of you was mortifying. So, then, you decided to mail it. The teacher gave you his address after you told her you wanted to invite him to your birthday party (it should be a little worrisome that a teacher was willing to pass on private information like that… perhaps it was because you were a kid). Three times you went to the mailbox to send the letter out and three times you ran back inside to hide it under your mattress.

That was the beginning of your weird little tradition. Though you never sent the letter to Jongin, you felt better having somewhat confessed your feelings and worked through them without the humiliation of actually… doing it. So, the next time you had a crush so overwhelming that you needed to get the feelings out, you wrote a letter. You even went all the way each time to address the envelope, giving the confession a sense of finality. There was no fear in them ever going out. Baekhyun was the only other one in the world who knew of their existence. At the current moment, eight were hidden in a drawer in your vanity. The way your fingers were itching, a ninth one was on the way.

“I might,” you finally replied.

Baekhyun leaned forward eagerly. “Can I read it when you’re done?”

“No!”

He snapped his fingers as he sat back in his chair. “Darn.”

“Why am I even friends with you?”

“Because I’m charming.”

There was no question in his voice. He one-hundred percent believed it. And… to be honest, he did have his moments. But that was all in the past. “Like a plank of wood.”

Shaking his head, Baekhyun rapped his hands on the table before standing up. “Alright, I’m going to class. Have fun with your pencil and imagination.” For emphasis on his stupid remark, he stole one last chip before walking off.

You finished off your sandwich in a bit of a rage. By the time you were finished, your mouth muscles were aching as if you’d spent several hours at the gym and it was jaw day.

You only had one class left for the afternoon. But it was algebra. How were you supposed to concentrate on functions when your sad attempt at getting into a relationship with your tutor failed so epically? Somehow you managed, though, and you packed up at the end of class with a new sort of determination. As you hopped on your bike and rode home, you thought over what you were going to write. You were so lost in your head that you hadn’t notice the car pulling out of your neighbor’s driveway, nearly hitting you before the driver hit their brakes.

“Shoot!”

You back peddled to break. Your heart thumped in your chest. No life memories flashed before your eyes, but you were sure you almost died. Slowly, you moved forward to get out of the way of the car. 

“I’m sorry!” you yelled over your shoulder.

The driver leaned out the window.

Oh, great.

It was your neighbor. Or, at least, your neighbor’s son. Do Kyungsoo. He stared at you with an expression that could be blank but could also be a glare. It was hard to tell with him. Shaking his head, he pulled back inside the car and drove away.

Fighting off embarrassment for the second time this day - albeit this situation was much lower on the scale and it happened a bit more often than you’d like to admit - you put your bike up in the backyard and headed up to your room. Your mother, a literary history professor, and your father, a doctor at the local hospital, were both at work and wouldn’t be home until well after dinner. You were used to it. Besides, you were an adult and you liked being able to decide to have pizza for dinner and not worry about what other people wanted for toppings. Once you put your order in, you sat down at your vanity and got to work.

 Dear Junmyeon,

Has anyone told you how your hair looks in the sunlight? The dark brown hues seem so warm and inviting, like an ebony chair that was warmed by the unfiltered rays. I’ve always wondered what it would be like to run my finger through it. Would the strands be as soft as they look? Would you wear the same smile on your face that you do during our sessions? But I guess I might not be meant to feel them. Today, I intended to tell you how I felt. I woke up with a determination, a goal to say how much I like you to your face. I was so nervous riding my bike to the university, but it was the good kind of nervous; the kind that makes you keep going. It seemed, however, that I was too late. Or maybe I simply never had a chance at all. I’d missed any signs that said you were already someone else’s.

I hope she knows how lucky she is. I hope she makes you laugh and listens to you when you’re having a bad day. Your laugh is like a symphony. Does she tell you how light and lovely it is? Or how infectious it is? When you laugh, I can’t help but laugh along. It’ll be sad not to hear it anymore. Or have our talks filled with random subject changes. But I think I’ll miss your smile most of all. The way it crinkles your eyes yet still lets them shine. The way it spreads across your face and the way your cheeks grow. It is truly a sight to behold. I hope wherever you go, you are always smiling. You always let your light shine even on the cloudiest of days. That’s what’s so special about you and what made me fall for you. Even when I was frustrated or couldn’t understand, you were patient, taking my mind off of the negative and turning me so I could face the positive. That’s a rare kind of person. You are a rare kind of person. Please always be happy, Kim Junmyeon.

Love,

(y/n)

 With a sigh you sat back in your chair. The letter had done its job. Though you were still sad about the way things turned out, you no longer felt defeated. The words you needed to say were now out there without being “out there”. Okay, so he had a girlfriend. Big deal. It wasn’t the end of the world. There were more potential love interests out there that you could find. He was only one and obviously wasn’t the one.

Beginning to smile again, you folded the letter and put it in an envelope. You didn’t have Junmyeon’s address, so you wrote out the address for the math lab. Opening the top drawer of the vanity, you placed the latest addition to your collection under the first envelope. The doorbell rang right as you closed it up again. Oh, thank goodness. Food.

Practically skipping down the steps, you hurried to the front door.

“Hi-” You stopped as soon as you’d opened it. The person waiting on the other side was not the pizza delivery guy - it was Baekhyun. The boxes holding the pizza and cheese sticks you’d order for no one but yourself were in his hands. Over his shoulder, you barely caught sight of the delivery man driving away. “Really?”

“What? I was bored. And hungry.” He flipped open the lid to show you the hot, melted cheese of the appetizer. “Cheese stick?”

Rolling your eyes, you stepped aside so he could come inside.

Baekhyun had been to your home plenty of times in the past so it was easy for him to make himself at home. He didn’t wait for you before pulling plates out of the cabinet and pouring a drink. He even went as far as getting you glass as well. “Thirsty?”

“Yeah, thanks.”

The two of you ate at the kitchen table as your mother had a “no meals in the living room” policy. Small snacks like nuts and popcorn were okay, as long as you didn’t spill any on the couches.

“So… how did the writing go?” Baekhyun asked cheekily between bites.

You shrugged. “Fine. I’m deciding that I’m getting over it.”

Now it was Baekhyun’s turn to roll his eyes. “You always get over them fast.”

“What’s the point of dwelling on the things you can’t change?”

That was always your answer. Yes, the hurt was immediate and painful, but Baekhyun was right, you tended to push it aside rather quickly. That was the whole point of your letters, anyway. Get the feelings out of the way so you could move on. What was the point of clinging on to something like that? You would only end up worse if you stayed in that spot. So, you pushed yourself to move on. And eight times out of nine, it had worked. There was only that one nagging letter that failed to do its job. That particular set of feelings refused to go away even as you looked to other crushes, as you found other boys to like. It was the one you would always wonder about, the one that was completely off limits. The dull ache still crept up every once in a while. If moving on was what you had to do, you would do it. Because you would prefer if you never had to go through something like that ever again.

[gwydionmisha]

Personal: The Family Cooking Bible

When Head Millennial was over last Wednesday I did the thing I often do where I offer two things they could make for my dinner and let him pick which one.  Usually it's one simple thing for if they have worn themself out and a more complicated or labor intensive option for if they're up to that after they've done the other stuff on the list for the day.  In this case, I've been having the kind of cravings that suggest low grade deficiency, so the easy option was a protein thing and the other option was high in vitamin C and good for depleted electrolytes.  I mentioned why it needed to be one of the two nutritionally.  They insisted on making both, which is fine since I could eat the bocas while they started the sauerkraut and sweet biscuits and I could just reheat that sucker later for second meal, which I totally did.  (They also prepped a salad with vegetarian friendly protein in it, knowing I would finish it with artichoke heats fore electrolytes.  head Millennial is a super star.)

I mentioned before that the big cooking bible is full of handwritten notes and glosses from various of my family members including me, and that we generally translate the recipes with certain standard substitutions we generally don't bother to write in.  This is why I am still using the stained, battered, and falling apart original and not the replacement I bought over half a decade ago.  I really need to sit down and transfer all the glosses across, but...  Anyway, the glosses and corrections that aren't mine were written by dead family members, which is another reason I've been slow to transcribe it all across.

So Head Millennial grabs the recipe book, finds the recipe that the real recipe is based on, but keeps double checking the changes since neither my grandmother, mother, nor I ever bothered to write the glosses in because it was obvious to us what to change or add.  But of course it isn't for the Millennial who's never seen, heard, or smelled this before the night he made it the first time.  So I answer the questions, but after I'm like, "It's totally fine if you want to check with me every time, but you are also welcome to write in the recipe changes in pencil.  Everybody does it."  So the Millennial asked for the pencil, and started writing in the changes, and I'm like, you know you can write in the sauerkraut and water proportions too if you like.  Which they eagerly did.

It was a huge relief to them.  They can confidently do it themself if they needs to, which is very much how they likes to work.  They are very bright and independent, and like me back when I was working like to know all the things.  It wasn't until Thursday evening that it dawned on me, Oh!  They were having extra emotions about it because they were writing in my family book.  It didn't occur to me that it would be odd, as really, my relationship with them is very much like Gran's relationship with me was, only in this instance, I am Gran.  (Gran was my Mother's Maternal Grandmother who lived to be a hundred.  she was one of the many gender nonconforming family members on that side of my family tree.  I was very close to her.  She died at the end of my first year at College).  Of course Head Millennial can gloss away all they like in the cooking bible: they are family.  (One of the older Millennials often reminds me of how my Mother and Grammy were together, with me being Grammy, my Mother's Mother, in this instance).

It is so strange to me still after all this time.  I never expected to survive this long.  I almost didn't because of Herberton, the tumor colony we removed in my mid thirties.  I never expected to survive to be a queer elder at all.  I very deliberately never had or adopted kids.  (Skye and I thought seriously about fostering older queer kids, but it didn't work out for a bunch of reasons).  still, here I am replicating the extended family multi generational dynamics of my mother's side of the family, the mutual aid and care and fundamental warmth of it, only from the other side of the mirror.

[zeldasayer]

I transcribed and translated Pedro’s interview from GQ Germany for all of us. I tried translating as good as possible but bear with me, English is not my mother tongue. By @sixties-loser

Pedro Pascal, the star from “Game of Thrones”, “Wonder Woman” and “The Mandalorian” talks about becoming an adult, film, fashion, corona – and a painful surgery in the exclusive GQ interview.

It seems almost eerie how empty the streets of LA are in the sunshine. Meanwhile a new normality seems to be coming to Europe, most people in L.A. are still cutting their own hair. Many have not seen their friends for half a year. The pandemic is out of control. The reaction towards it too. Inviting someone into their garden for a “distance drink” can cause the same distress as suggesting to switch spouses.

Therefore, it was particularly surprising that Pedro Pascal immediately accepted. He accepted the drink, not to switch spouses. He is one of the rising stars and newcomers this year – if it wasn’t for corona sending the whole film industry into a forced vacation, there would most likely not have been time for said drink. After having his skull crushed in “Game of Thrones” followed the lead role as a DEA agent hunting Pablo Escobar in “Narcos” in 2015 and now he is stepping towards big Hollywood films. From the 1st of October onwards the Chilean-born actor will be starring in the blockbuster “Wonder Woman 1984”. Moreover, the second season of the “Star Wars”-series “The Mandalorian” on Disney+ starring him as the lead is going to air in October this year – but he will be underneath a helmet. Well, we all are under a helmet in 2020 in one way or another. We want to meet the man who a few years ago still worked as a waiter in New York, whose parents were political refugees who found asylum in Denmark and settled in Texas and whose son one day signed up for a theatre group in High School.

Then, the cancellation! While we were in the middle of fixing up the house and the garden for the drink with Pedro and organizing the fashion shoot, which was not easy considering the safety measures in L.A., his management called with an unfortunate message: Pedro – no, not sick with corona – had to get emergency surgery because of a damaged tooth and was lying in bed with a swollen face that was hindering him from speaking and taking pictures. The sun is shining onto empty streets. And our empty garden.

A few days later he nonetheless arrived at our front door without a swollen face but still with threads in his mouth. He was not chauffeured by a limo-service but he came with his own car – he even picked up his make-up artist. He is helping her carrying all of her utensils into the house and declares: “I’ve got time today!”. What a celebrity! It seemed like we did not want to ask him how he made it to the A-List of Hollywood but he wanted to ask us how we made it to the A-list. Pedro Pascal! Yes, what kind of a celebrity?

Pedro Pascal: Sorry for messing with your plans. The surgery was an emergency.

GQ: Really? We were wondering whether the swelling wasn’t the product of a secret visit to the plastic-surgeon. Apparently, they are drowning in work because of the quarantine in Hollywood.

PP: I have to disappoint you. A few days before our appointment I was rushing to the hospital with a fractured tooth and the worst pain in my entire life – a hospital in which treats people with severe cases of corona. I was unable to reach any dentist! Right in front of the parking lot a specialist called me back. The pain was hell despite the ten injections I got. The doctor said I was not an exception because a lot of people are grinding their teeth because of all the stress.

GQ: What are you most afraid of at the moment?

PP: How the government is handling the pandemic is worrying me more than the virus itself. This shortage of intelligent management of the crisis is a moral shame. The leadership crisis in this country is turning us all into orphans – destitute and abandoned.

GQ: How did you spend your time over the last few months?

PP: I spent it with frozen pizza and sweatpants in Venice Beach. I live in a rear house that’s in a family’s garden. Actually, there are a lot of good takeout places nearby but for some reason I just love pepperoni pizza from the supermarket.

GQ: That does not really sound like movie star-lifestyle. What does it feel like being suddenly stopped from top speed to zero?

PP: Regarding what is going on around the world one should hold back one’s own mental turmoil. I would be lying if I was saying that I am not disappointed. The whole team put a lot of heart and work into the production of “Wonder Woman 1984”. We had a lot of fun on set. I wished to travel around the world and introduce the film with the same lively energy.

GQ: You come from a politically engaged, socialist family that fled from the Pinochet-regime in Chile. What do you remember from that time?

PP: My sister and I were born in Chile but I was only nine months old when we first found asylum in Denmark. From there we quickly came to San Antonio in Texas where my dad started working as a doctor at the university clinic.

GQ: Texas is not known as a socialist utopia. How did you assimilate?

PP: San Antonio is not a Cowboy-town but very diverse with big Asian, black and Latino communities. I remember it as a romantic place, culturally open. The culture shock only came as we later moved to range county in California. There the atmosphere was suddenly white, preppy and conservative.

GQ: How were you received in California?

PP: I’m still ashamed of the fact that I did not correct my classmates when they kept on calling me Peter. I am Pedro. Even if I didn’t grow up in Chile the country and the language are still a part of me. I was very unhappy in that environment. However, I was fortunately able to go to another school close to Long Beach where I felt more comfortable. Through the theater group at that school I found my way.

GQ: Were you able to visit Chile as a child?

PP: Yes, when my parents made it to the list of expatriates that were able to travel to Chile without consequences. First, there was a big family reunion and then my sister and I stayed there for a few months with relatives while my parents went back to Texas. They likely needed a break from us. They got us when they were very young, had a buzzing social life and my mother was obtaining a PhD in psychology.

GQ: Was your mother a typical young psychologist who wanted to apply her theoretical knowledge at home?

PP: You mean, whether I was her guinea pig? For sure! I remember strange tests and sittings that were disguised as games where someone was watching me react to different toys. I cannot have been older than six but I was already aware of the dynamic. My favourite thing was being questioned about my dreams. That was a wonderful opportunity to come up with fantastic stories.

GQ: Was that your first performance?

PP: Of course! My mother worried about my strong imagination because I was living in my own fantasy world rather than reality. I hated going to school. I was always categorized as the troublemaker. At one point, the topics at school became more interesting and my grades also went up. There are so many kids that are unnecessarily diagnosed with learning disabilities without considering that school can be abhorrent. Why is it so accepted to be bored in class when there are so many stimulating ways to convey knowledge?

GQ: Considering al that has happened this summer around the world: Do you believe that we can seriously demand social change now?

PP: I Hope so. After lockdown, the first time I went out was to protest for “Black Lives Matter” on the streets. The energy was peaceful and hopeful until the police provoked severe conflicts. Nevertheless, we cannot run from problems like we used to this time and we cannot distract ourselves from them either. It seems like the pressure of the pandemic led to a new clarity: We cannot go on this way.

GQ: The “Wonder Woman 1984” Trailer revives the optimism of the 1980’s. From today’s point of view, it seems almost nostalgic.

PP: That’s right. You really are happy for two hours. The director Patty Jenkins created a film full of positive messages. We shot in Washington D.C., then in London and Spain – this sounds like I am talking of a past time.

GQ: Do you miss traveling?

PP: I’m just now realizing the privilege of just packing up one’s stuff and being able to fly anywhere. An American passport used to guarantee unlimited travel. And that’s why it the small radius of our lives is actually unimaginable. Over the last years I often retreated for a break after shootings because I was constantly on the move and overstimulated. My friends were already complaining I had become too comfortable. We all took social contact for granted and are only realizing now how dependent we actually are on human contact. Over the last weeks I often longingly thought about all the parties and dinner invitations I declined.

GQ: In L.A. people spend more time at home or nature than in other metropolises that are more geared towards public life. Could this city become your second home after New York?

PP: My Real Home are my friends. I have been a nomad since I was little and I do not have a place where I have put down roots. Up until not long ago my physical home was a place in between departure and arrival. Therefore, it was something I did not want to complicate through the accumulation of stuff. On the contrary: Without having read Marie Kondo’s book I have freed myself from excess baggage over the last few years and I lived relatively minimally.

GQ: Is there nothing you collect or something you just can’t throw away?

PP: Books! I even still have the literature I read when I was a teenager and when I was in college. Recently, I stumbled upon a box full of old theatre manuscripts and materials from my time at the New York University. I also cannot part from art easily, just like I cannot part from lamps or old photos. On the other hand, I can easily get rid of furniture and clothes.

GQ: Do you remember roles that were really only completely defined through the costume?

PP: Yes, I am particularly thinking about “Game of Thrones”. At that time I understood for the first time what it meant to be supported by a look. This is thanks to the costume designer Michele Clapton. She created very feminine robes and brocade coats for my character that nevertheless looked masculine when worn and I felt very sexy in them. Of course, Lindy Hemmings power-suits and Jan Swells bleached hairstyle for the tycoon-villain in “Wonder Woman 1984” were very important as well. At first I did not really see myself in the role because the cuts and colors of the 80s do not really fit my body. I’m more the 70s type.

GQ: Do you incorporate those inspirations into your personal wardrobe?

PP: In my free time I choose comfort over a cool look these days. Sometimes I miss the times when I expressed myself through a certain style. It is hard to imagine that I went to Raves as a teenage in the 90s; I was a real club kid with ridiculous outfits: overalls, balloon pants, football shirts and a top hat, like in Dr.Seuss’s “Cat in a Hat”. Later in New York I was hanging out with a group of people that felt it was very important to have a certain style. The fact that I am basically only wearing sweatpants everyday is actually tragic.

GQ: whoever plays roles in comic book adaptations becomes a bodybuilder and eats ten chicken breasts a day. You don’t?

PP:My body would not agree with that. It is hard enough to stay in shape normally. When you’re in your mid-forties you have to live with a lot more discipline. Up until before my tooth-incident I worked out with a trainer in my garden multiple times a week to keep the quarantine body in check.

GQ: Apart from the personal trainer, are you in a steady relationship?

PP: I am not ready for that yet. Maybe at some point I will be but until then I’ll let it be. I can’t even offer you absurd corona dating stories.

GQ: What would annoy you the most if you were your own roommate?

PP: I can be quite controlling. I have to conjure all my humanity to prevent myself from going through my entire film collection. When I don’t want something I cannot keep it to myself or be passive-aggressive, I always have to take it to the frontlines. Other than that, I tend to have tunnel view: when I am not feeling well I cannot imagine to ever feel better again. I have trouble relativizing my emotions or to wave off problems. Method-acting would really not be for me. This is why I try to only work on projects that feel good, where there is mutual support and encouragement.

GQ: When we were trying on the clothes earlier you spoke of a lack of self-confidence. How does that get along with a career like yours?

PP: Isn’t it interesting how these characteristics and circumstamces relate? Self-worth comes from inside but it is also influenced by what society values because we often internalise the public gaze. I have lived in New York for 20 years, I studied there and made a living by working as a waiter until my mid-thirties because the theatre and film jobs I got did not pay the bills. There were so many times I was almost there. The disappointment of having missed the perfect role or opportunity by a hair’s width can be crushing. When should you give up and what is plan B? That is a question that is not only on many actors‘s minds but also on many others minds who struggle for a living – no matter how much potential they have or how close they seem to be to the top. We are seeing now how our narrow definition of success destroys society. At the same time, we are realizing that where we come from and the color of our skin still decide whether we can exist with dignity.

GQ: What are the positive aspects of a relatively late success as leading-man?

PP: I feel like I can decide over my own life without the pressure of having to accept projects or to have to present a certain identity on social media. This is for sure also because I am a man. Regardless of age, Women have to try harder to stand out.

GQ: Life always consists of risk management – now more than usual. For what would you risk losing something?

PP: Generally, when you never risk something you might never get ahead. That is for friendship, love, work and creativity. I have to be ready to take risks for the things that really matter to you.