#these guys are taking the snake theme very seriously

[intheshadowsbehindyou]

Hello! I was wondering if you could write about the Merc's with a gn! reader who loves baking?

Btw, I love your writing style! It all feels so accurate and it's helping to feed this new fixation of mine <3 <3

I see we have some food lovers in the askbox, chat. *crackles knuckles* you ask, and daddy delivers.

Mercs with somebody who gives them food

Scout:

- Depends on your current location. The gravel wars isn’t short of moving from place to place. If it’s somewhere like japan he’ll go full weeb mode and eat nothing but fish related dishes. You know speed racer? In the fucked up TF2 universe there’s a speed racer themed restaurant. Take him there. (On second thought maybe don’t go eating with him in Japan he might eat the Hiroshima rocks.)

- He swears he’s on a diet but it’s inconsistent as fuck. This is the same guy who canonically eats radiation we’re talking about here. You hand him some warm bread you baked and he’s ecstatic. You catch him sprinkling something on his slice. It’s grounded up like pepper. He’s like “This? This shit is fuckin’ perfect. The person who owns my gym back in boston recommended it for energy. Tastes great.” You read the label and you realize it’s grounded up uranium.

- If you make him homemade fried chicken he’ll nearly choke up. Seriously. nobody’s ever done that for him before. Giving him food in general is also his love language but chicken? He thinks you want to marry him forever and ever now.

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Soldier:

- You don’t really know what soldier likes.. He doesn’t make anything very evident and tries his hardest to make his one defining trait being that he’s a veteran. But you know that’s not true. You decide to make him some sandwiches and he’s confused. “Huh.. Well that’s some weird tasting MREs. Not complaining. It’s actually really good. Shame that civilians can’t get the same luxury right now.” He says. You have no idea how to explain that WW2 is virtually nonexistent anymore.

- Finally you settle with something. Honey with warm bread. Instead of eating slices like a normal person he just swallows the entire loaf like a snake. You are worried for this man’s intestines. He seems to be fine however.

- Gives you either a romantic or platonic kiss on the head. Your pick. His breath smells sugary and sweet and you nuzzle your head against his collarbone in response. This is his way of showing he appreciated the food.

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Demoman:

- I sure hope you’re capable of producing stew because that’s all he eats when he isn’t unhealthily suppressing his own hunger with scrumpy.

- You get him to eat a variety of food somehow. Although he’s picky, he isn’t impossible either. Due to growing up in an orphanage he was no stranger to having to cook for himself at times when the caretakers just really didn’t care. You exchange recipes. For some reason he has an entire Scottish cookbook under his bed. As well as a book on “Leonerdo Da Fuq’s Basic Guide To blowing Sentries Up. And making it look like an accident.”

- He’s very thankful. Demoman’s not much of a foodie. He eats to live rather than lives to eat. But your snacks hit different. They’re made with your love. That’s why they’re so much better than what he typically eats.

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Engineer:

- WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU THATS HIS JOB. HE’S THE OVERBEARING GRANDMOTHER THAT WONT STOP SHOVING FOOD INTO HER KIDS MOUTH!!! NOT YOU!!!

- He eats everything you give him. Even if it doesn’t particularly tickle his fancy. His belly is big and swollen afterwards and you want to squish him so bad. That’s a pillow waiting to be laid on. He then tells you fond memories of thanksgiving and when his mother would cook his family an entire turkey dinner.

- He responds twofold by making you something as well. You wake up one day to find an entire breakfast platter laid on your end table. There’s a little sticky note there and although it doesn’t have a name on it — the dash alongside the expertly drawn symbol of his class is evident enough. Only somebody with expertise in blueprints would draw something like that. Hint hint.

——————————————————————

Heavy:

- Heavy isn’t a dumbass by any means but this is a certified Heavy L situation. He thinks you’re trying to offend him at first because people call him fat on a regular basis. Medic explains from afar that actually it’s a gesture meant to express hospitality, and upon realizing you were just being nice he looks embarrassed and rubs the back of his neck.

- Lets you spoon feed him your food. He likes it for some reason. He likes any kind of meat, and protein. He eats that shit everyday. Not just that but dark chocolate and other bitter tasting foods as well. Despite his massive size he doesn’t actually eat large portions at a time.

- He knows how to make mostly deserts. Takes on a sort of mentor role and tries to teach you how to bake cakes and stuff like that. You’ve never seen Heavy in such a domesticated setting. Watching him go about cooking without breaking somebody’s skull in for once was actually kind of surreal.

————————————————————————-

Pyro:

- Cook / get them nothing but sweets. They won’t eat anything else. You begin to wonder if Pyro is even remotely human because of how much unhealthy food they eat. (But then again you’ve seen soldier survive losing both his arms and Medic sowing them back on. It’s probably fine.)

- They are unbelievably excited to see you walk into the room with plates and/or boxes. You’ve unintentionally pavloved them into associating it with your food. They clap and make grabby hands. Wanting to see what sweets you’ve brought them.

- It’s actually quite odd.. You see them retreat into their quarters to eat their food. It’s clear they’ve eaten it because they always take the plates back but you’re never allowed to see them eat directly. They don’t attend dinner with the other mercs or even breakfast.

- DO NOT LET THEM NEAR THE FUCKING OVEN. DO NOT LET THEM COOK. THE ADMINISTRATOR MADE IT AGAINST THE RULES TO LET PYRO NEAR THE STOVE.

————————————————————————-

Sniper:

- “Bloody hell.. This for me?” His voice hiked up a little. A little shocked that somebody would even consider making or buying him food in the first place, Only his parents ever did that for him. He takes it hesitantly but his expression doesn’t seem negative. Just incredibly dumbfounded. You had got him some donuts from a market in tuefort. You figured it would go well with his coffee.

- Immediately starts eating them. Sniper is both a meats sort of guy and a sweets sort of guy. Looks from side to side to make sure nobody saw him take your offer. That would be a embarrassing. He grabs the entire box and retreats into his camper van like a rat.

- He then slowly opens the door.. “Oh, right. Bugger. This is typically the moment I comfortably invite you in.” He cringes at the thought. Leaving the door open for you, and moving aside to let you in. He begins telling you the basics about how to hunt your food. For some reason it’s all incredibly dangerous aussie animals though. Some of the stuff doesn’t sound edible but he’s apparently eaten. He’s especially passionate about how to properly cook crocodiles.

———————————————————————-

Medic:

- Pretentiously nitpicks the fact you brought him cupcakes. Citing his knowledge about how too much sugar consumption can kill you… whilst simultaneously eating the cupcakes.

- “Even worse yet —- they ruin your dental health. Hoo, i’d hate to be on the receiving end of a tooth filling by an angry dentist.” He says, shoving more of your sweets into his face. You wonder if he’s even self aware of what he’s doing to be honest. “Although I do envy their sadism! It’s much worse than mine, actually — Das schmeckt gut.” He adds.

- He frowns. You knew Medic had loved cupcakes in particular so you were confused at first. Well it wasn’t that. In fact it was something more stupid. “Well then again the consumption of sugar is important for our bodies, I must add. With the wrong diet we could die from low blood sugar. I wonder if it is possible to extract all the sugar from a human body using a sort of giant homebrewed syringe. It is in theory possible for me to—“ The man is at his chalkboard writing down mathematical equations again.

———————————————————————-

Spy:

- When you give him food for the first time he’s unbelievably pouty. Couldn’t you have asked him his tastes first? He hesitantly eats what you give him anyway. As long as it isn’t fried, fast food, candy or anything that wasn’t expensive as fuck.

- Incredibly good table manners. Incredibly good at cooking his native cuisine. For some reason he’s intent on insisting that french food is superior than any other food. When you’re eating with him he straightens your posture, politely puts your napkin in your lap and schools you on the fact you’re not using your salad fork or whatever. There’s way too much pointless shit on his table. Who the fuck created all these weirdly specific rules?

- Eventually he’s so tired from trying to teach you he loses his temper and crosses his arms like a discontent toddler while you eat nonchalantly. “What?” You say. Using the wrong fork again. He’s still staring at you. “What?!” You repeat yourself. “I love you, Spy.” You say. Shoving more food into your mouth. He keeps glaring at you.

[katyspersonal]

Here’s a triple whammy, Midra, Messmer, Rellana for the character bingo pls?

( @izunias-meme-hole )

Ohh bitchin'

God I just.. I will have to try to not turn it into an essay for your SANITY (ba dum tss) but in simplest terms possible, this was THE peak DLC experience for me. The Abyssal Woods already were super interesting and atmospheric, as well as learning that Midra is a NERD with so many books all over his Manse. But like.. the battle already captivated me a lot. It was just.. so well-done in every aspect. The music, the movements and attacks... No boss ever deserved the staple "battle feels like a dance once you get into it" praise more than this guy. ;-; I already was not normal about Frenzied Flame in general, but this just dhfssdfg It was so well executed god. Remember being OBSESSED with his music theme, also the first character in a while to make me often check his character tag on Tumblr. @val-of-the-north won't let me lie, I was literally drooling thinking about him in the first few days after that fight and could not think of anyone else @_@

Also I really enjoyed digging further into his story and motivations, what happened here with the Three Fingers and Nanaya. Analysis of the whole SoTe for me. This brand of despair also appeals to me at all, especially when it is tied to you and your associates being hunted like heretics (only the old ones remember!!! XD). Funny enough, just the day before I've met him in the game I've had a very unique mental breakdown where I was ranting like a madman about how much I've tired of holding the horrors and pain inside and how I wanted to just give up and unleash it. I can't get into too much details, it was very personal, however the phrase "May chaos take the world" was stuck in my head all along! And Val mentioned that 'interestingly enough, a theme like this IS addressed in SoTE' + 'you kin one of the characters for sure' so... yeah, that was something. I needed a character like this quite a lot :')

Messmer is AWESOME!! I do not obsess actively but rather just reblog the fanart and stuff that gets on my dashboard, but there are SO many things I said as my thoughts about his and Marika's relationship. And now I have even more to say! You could tell I love Midra more, but Messmer offers infinitely more to talk about and explore! And, god, his charisma, having attracted so many intelligent people to join him and even accept his serpentine nature (apparently a big no for people in the setting for some reason fdjjfds). Also one of the best designs in the Soulsborne series EVER. Also it is his voice actor's DEBUT! Literally HOW????? sfhdjhsdhgfdshds

It IS, for sure, hard to talk about him and not touch upon MANY other characters as he is tied with them so much. Marika, Melina, Fire Knights (especially Queelign), closest Black Knights that ditched him, Rellana, Gaius, Winged Snakes, god knows who else... I love how many relationship he has, but also what interesting potential he opened for exploring the lore with Abyss, Base Serpent and potentially Fell God! He is so many things. And I think this is appropriate how hard it is to discuss him outside of his relationships and curses... It is just like the character himself: having his life and purpose in it basically predefined by a curse he had no control over and his mother, and being a scourge or an idol for others, but barely being a person on his own... Discussions about him are JUST like him, you see what I mean? This also makes me emotional.

I do not have that many headcanons about her, but I am proud of those that I have! x) There is always the room to create more of course! Ok naturally 'everyone else is wrong about them' is not meant to be taken seriously fdshfhds But a big cornerstone for understanding her was the description of her swords referring to Moon and Fire having always been together in Japanese original script, which is just the sentiment from Sword of Night and Flame! So I can no longer see her as huge Erdtree/Marika simp at all, but instead as someone who, although without any hard feelings for her sister's choice, believes Cosmic Sorcery and Fire should be together (again) which makes me look at other takes like:

Just the curse of getting brain hard-locked on your interpretation fdshfhds On another note, I fucking LOVE her design, I am NOT able to enjoy any other armour anymore and just want to wear hers all the time fhhfsd 'Silly' because Twin Moons IS a silly concept, as well as cosplaying Sulyvahn XD ...but also because I see her as silly and fun person, to contrast Messmer's emo vibe x) Smug about kicking asses too! She gives me this strange feeling too, like... I can accept most of the bosses having to die for the plot and narrative, but thinking about her getting killed actually upsets me! She is an optional boss and should STAY as such. #rellanaplslive

[kirua9]

Thoughts on the Arcana prologue

Well I absolutely love the art style, but it need more cut scenes...Also, when we're at the dining room in the Palace.....Why the Habanera is playing ? Why this exact theme? For me it sounds nothing like royal, maybe a but anxious, but I still have 0 ideas Why they chose this music for the palace. It sounds frivolous and bohemian, plus in Carmen it's sung by..fabric workers, no royal themes lol. So when I hear this at Nadia's place I'm like...Eh.?? Maybe for the creators this music sounds kinda arrogant? That's why you chose it?.. or simply liked if, bit for me I have no clue. Weird choice tbh (why not the variations on the dance of the Knights by Prokofiev then?.. at least it's more "royal")

Characters. Asra. Man is always going somewhere we don't know about, we're ruling the shop, we're still his student but he doesn't really care about us and um ahahahah I'd never chose his route for romance, only for the plot. He seems very shady, I still don't know what is he and how the MC and Asra met, and he has some weird relationships with Julian ig?.. He's pretty mysterious but as sneaky as the snake. No bad words abt Faust btw, Faust is fine.

Then we meet Nadia. Oh she looks just like the dream the prettiest girl I've ever seen but I also was so concerned that the countess herself visited our shop like that... Tbh I also have 0 trust to her, just like to Asra, but if Asra is sneaky, this woman is a politician. Lololol. Sorry. And when the story started saying that Lucio was dead...I was like "hm could it be you?.. A smart woman who made a perfect usurpation? No? Okay." But from what I've heard she's considered to be "understanding" and "empathic". Fine

Ensuite, we have Portia. I...liked that she is simple to approach and simple to escape. Idk I'm not interested in her, tbh. Guess I'll do her route after other characters' stories. She's like... she seems a very sidekick function to the MC. Nothing but a companion for Nadia and sometimes (?) Julian. She looks like she's from Greece with that hair. She like fine but boring...Idk

Who was next?.. Muriel?.. I don't know. So gives off massive Beowolf vibes by his appearance. But he's also looks like the hottest from all the gang. I'm intrigued of his chains and ghostly (idk why but he looks like a vision, like a ghost, like also something very mysterious thing) vibe, and judging by his appearance and behavior he's someone's slave maybe?.. Or he's like a gladiator, like a slave fighter. Idk, but I liked his image

Julian. Well, guess I found the reason why people play this game ahagsh. The silly-horny-dramatic-bittersweet guy who's a doctor so he's empathic and kind, buy he had some troubles with Count's case, like... a good criminal? I'm still not sure since now I'm saving up coins to buy the book and to read his route like that. I just like him. Yes for him it's normal to be at our shop at night bc he screams that he's weird yk, it's low-key normal for his status (not Nadia's). Guess I'll read his route first of all.

Lucio. He...looks like Dio. Lol I can't take him seriously, but he looks like he'd be funny to play though his route. Lol what the hell is in his mind, seems like he summoned the devil(aka the goat) or so, he's a total red flag and fcking insane but... I'm interested....

So the order lď play the routes

Julian

Muriel

Lucio

Asra

Nadia

Portia

Maybe change Nadia with Asra idk honestly. But the girls don't look interesting

[atamascolily]

TBF S4 Speculation: We Could Be Immortal

Urobuchi has said in interviews that Thunderbolt Fantasy Season 4 is going to dig into Shang and Lin's backstories. I'm of two minds on this--on the one hand, I live for juicy details about my faves, gimme all ya got. On the other hand, one thing I genuinely like about TBF is how much remains mysterious and open into interpretation. Character backstories can be challenging, and up until this point, they haven't been necessary for the narrative--I think Urobuchi is a talented enough writer to pull off a satisfying reveal that ties into everything else, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous... and curious.

Because I love speculating, and because there's still a month and a half before S4 starts airing, I'm going to write out my thoughts for the hell of it.

I first came across the "Shang is a fallen god" theory from @jafndaegur's fic "Just A Guy With A Sword" and it's intrigued me ever since. A past history as a martial god of some sort would not only explain Shang's unique skill set, it would also explain why collecting magical swords and preventing misuse of them is so uniquely personal--as a way of atoning for the suffering and destruction he's undoubtedly been privy to in that kind of privileged position. Not to mention that Shang's decision to reject his destiny/role and do his own thing as a (mostly) ordinary human being feels so in-character for him.

I like this idea because it makes Shang, and his emphasis on appreciating everyday life becomes even more poignant and meaningful as a result. It fits into the series' larger themes of the responsible use of power and an emphasis on free will and choice over destiny and fate. Plus, it would delightfully recontextualize the entire series, from Lin Xue Ya's wry comment at their first meeting that Shang has no respect for the divine to Shang's conversation with Bai Lian, an ordinary person who was mistaken for an immortal. Not to mention a contrast with whatever Huo Shi Ming Huang has planned--unknown for now, but almost certainly related to acquiring cosmic power(s). Up to this point, we've only had humans and demons, but there's no reason why Urobuchi couldn't up the stakes even more by introducing beings with entirely new power levels, just like he did with the introduction of the Sorcerous Sword Index at the end of S1.

(Also, as a bonus, this would be a backstory for Shang that wouldn't involve fridging his family or anyone else he cared about; we've had quite enough of that already, thank you very much.)

On a meta level, becoming an all-powerful divinity has been a running theme throughout Urobuchi's prior works, so the idea of someone starting out as a god and then giving it up seems like a logical evolution of the idea, as well as a fun twist. I could totally see him doing it here.

I've suspected for a long time that Lin Xue Ya might not be fully human--his lack of canonical birthday (when even the immortal demons have them!), his incredible genre-savviness, etc, etc, all point to someone who isn't what he seems to be, on top of his general sketchiness. (Depending on how seriously you take the epilogue to Bewitching Melody of the West, it also seems like he has knowledge that he shouldn't otherwise have, again pointing to him as a meta-narrator and authorial stand-in.) As a trickster figure, he echoes the kitsune of Japanese legend (who can take on human form in many stories), and the main Pili series has a bunch of dragons with human forms. [A recent social media post for this year's Dragon Boat Festival also put Lin Xue Ya in the role of Bai Suzhen, the famous "White Snake" of legend who took on human form and fell in love, so, uh, there's that.] Lin Xue Ya's backstory also involves him giving up and turning away from the path of the sword, which in turn could mean that he also gave up on other things as well when he became a wandering thief and rogue whose sole purpose in life is his own personal amusement.

Previously, my one stumbling block with this theory was that Lin and Shang are both opposites and equals in every sense of the word. This is, for instance, the reason why Lin also has to be a Secret Sword Master at the end of Season 1, because Shang is one. In order for them to contrast each other most effectively, they have to be on the same level. Thus, if Lin Xue Ya isn't or wasn't human, then Shang also has to be the same level of being in order for this symmetry to be maintained. Having Shang be a fallen god would satisfy this requirement and then some.

Given that the ending of the series is most likely Shang and Lin walking off into the sunset together as their journey continues, this backstory would also mean they were and have always been timeless and archetypal, with no beginning or end, and the symmetry is also pleasing to me.

Is this where the story is actually going? I have no idea, but this is certainly plausible and I look forward to finding out!

[lifmera]

Hello there, can I get a romantic matchup for Hazbin, Helluva and Genshin Impact (I hope that's not too many)?

I'm bisexual (with a preference for men but I'm down for whatever) and I use she/her. I'm an ambivert. For those who don't know me very well, I may appear calm, collected and polite, but when I get close with someone, that's when my true personality comes out; I'm very sarcastic and sassy, especially if someone gets on my nerves. When I'm with my friends, I like to joke around, engage in playful banter with them, even often affectionately insult them (if that makes sense). I also love to tease and I don't mind being teased back. Even though I'm a bit goofy, I'm usually the rational, maybe even mom friend of the group; the type of friend who tries to stop the rest from doing dumb shit if I think it's too dumb or dangerous (but if it's pretty harmless, I'll gladly join in on the fun). I also tend to curse like a sailor lol. But my friends say that I'm also thoughtful, open and understanding. I can be very patient and gentle as well if I want too.

As for my style, I usually dress in all black (fun fact: I never wear skirts though, I despise them) and I love silver jewelry. I always have a silver ring on each finger or both hands (without them I feel almost naked) and usually snake or dragon-themed silver earrings.

My main hobbies and interests are: listening to music (I can't live without it), lately I've been listening mostly to any rock or metal type of music or similar (for example I love bands such as Ghost and Nickelback). Besides that, I also love to draw, read, and travel. Sometimes I also like to play or do some sports (I've been a horse rider since I was seven and I love swimming). But I also like to just sit on the couch and watch movies (preferably with friends).

Also, my main love languages are: psychical affection, quality time and gift giving.

I think that's it, thank you in advance!

Hi!! Of course 🩷

I’ve decided to pair you with…. LOONA, ADAM & XIAO!

I mean can you blame me? You guys would get along so well.

Honestly- her and octavia too would be drawn in by your sense of style.

Before she knew your personality, she probably thought you were just another person wither coming to work in the office or pay.

Once she got to know you though? BEST FRIENDS.

She would engage in playful banter with you, but at some point she’ll start to take it seriously. Similarly what she does to moxxie.

She thinks its hilarious when you join in on making fun of Moxxie or Blitz, or even joining in their adventures! Shes also glad theres someone other than her who’ll stop Them from getting into trouble per usual.

You and Loona would have the same Music taste honestly, i think you guys would head bang 24/7 if you could LOL

She’d love your jewelry honestly, and probably ask you to spare her some. She just wants to match :(

Not the biggest physical touch person, but she will hold your hand. She doesn’t trust anyone else around you. Other than Blitzo..

Time for ADAM!

Are we surprised x2?

He would TOTALLY ROCK OUT WITH YOUUUUUUU!!!!

He’s a jackass, but lets be real… (hes fine as fuck-) he would stop if you genuinely asked him, and he liked you!!!

If you joined in on the bullying? Or just teasing? Dream come TRUE !

He definitely would bully you for your style at first but listen.. its because he’s a loser and he cant flirt :(

If you are patient with Adam, it’ll mean the WORLD to him. He needs someone who will listen to him for once.

Definitely loves the music taste.

He probably steals ur rings when u dont notice, and then out of nowhere he’ll be like strumming his guitar n u just see ur rings… and be like “i thought u didnt like them..”

And he was like “ermmmm 🥹🥺🥺”

He def loves physical touch and quality time. They go hand in hand

OK XIAO TIME!!

I just gave you all the emo’s.

This is what you get!!!

Definitely when you first met, you both were silent as fuck.

Dont expect him to talk cus he wont.

So you finally talk, and honestly when he realizes your personality, i think he would enjoy being around you.

He might be put off at first, with the teasing but i think he would actually… enjoy it ?

He definitely would like people who are more mean to him.

He thought your outfit was honestly so bomb, and would take your shit too.

What is with these characters…

Unlike the other two, he’d probably ask for permission though!! Cus hes a sweetie at heart.

Quality time and gift giving are his love languages for you!!

~~

THEY WERE KINDA SHORT!! IM SORRY 😭😭

[onewomancitadel]

I have this personal issue with YA is that most of the time I feel like the genre is working at odds with itself. When I was around that age I felt like the idea of my exploration into adult storytelling (which began like most children around age 12) being compromised by something ostensibly aimed at me was patronising. It was telling me that 'this' was what I ought to be reading, which didn't feel right. More specifically I think the majority of the time it fails to tell the story of teenage transition into adult responsibility mostly because I think adult stories already do this well, and I think it's a disservice to young readers to imply otherwise. And even more specifically I don't think it has the established pedagogy behind it that children's storytelling does, by necessity, because the educational purpose of children's storytelling is essentially a civic responsibility.

I also think that the phenomenon of adult readers largely bolstering the YA genre is very telling about what it is good at, e.g. light entertainment, low emotional stakes, simple and straightforward tie between emotional development of the romance to the plot (often romance novels don't have genre plottiness).

I was thinking on this reading an interview with Suzanne Collins after I had recently reread The Hunger Games, where she discussed her intentions to write a war story for children/teenagers within the YA genre. And something that occurred to me reading both THG as well as the recent prequel backstory for the bad guy is that at every turn, her thematic intentions are compromised by recognisable YA tropes which just make it feel sticky and plastic. I cannot take it seriously as a book that adults can read. This is distinct from children's storytelling, because there is a discord between the adult themes and the childish portrayal.

You can tell me until you're blue in the face that the love triangle is a symbolic war for Katniss between war and peace, but that does not justify the material vehicle for this idea: a love triangle, with tropey entitlement, with clumsy execution, with delayed execution when the author is trying to tell you she's writing a serious story where Prim doesn't survive, and then Katniss/Peeta is kind of realised offhandedly afterwards. There is an inherent silliness to trying to marry this idea of a love triangle to a serious moral conflict. The serious moral conflict which girls face at that age is not something farcically realised through which boy they like. They have serious moral concerns about the world and it is actually facile to imply otherwise, and it is in no way redeemed through its metaphor. Worse, the definitive resolution of the love triangle lands with a dull thud, and I am still teased endlessly, with boring and hackneyed and gimmicky scenes between Katniss and Gale, that perhaps she might actually just choose this one (wink) - not at all reflective of the allure of violence, the call for vengeance - the painful consequences of violence, the spiritual wear of it - right through to the third book. She does not definitively reject Gale, with emphatic insistence - with fear or hatred or something thematically meaningful - and is essentially forced into that position via Prim's death. Yes, it's symbolic - yet symbolism is not self-justifying. Symbolism heightens and suggests material, not is materiality unto itself.

This is not least to get into my problems with the prequel story (A Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes), where the spiritual corruption of its protagonist is something straight out of Dostoyevsky yet is written like the twee YA story it is. It is constantly at war with itself because it is trying to write something 'for young people' with higher themes. What I think is truly condescending is the implication that for war stories to be accessible to teenagers, it must be simplified in a medium 'meant for kids'. Sure - the series is grossly popular and has had a massive reception, for the good in some ways, that makes people think about the spectacle of war (even if i do think this theme of spectacle is actually compromised by its own genre). But I do think that the aspirational intent of the THG series really is probably the perfect example of my bone to pick with the YA genre. It compromises itself. Had it not been YA, or had it not stuck to YA conventions, I think it would have been more artistically defensible. And I don't even think this is a matter of the simplicity of the prose, or even the presence of romance, or a young girl's perspective of war - none of those three, pointed to as traditional elements of YA, are the problem here. The identifiable structure of the three books (repeating three times) is probably not even the problem either. But it wants me to believe it has serious things to say, using silly vehicles for it.

I still think the fundamental existence of the YA genre is questionable. For whom is it truly aimed at? What does it mean to teach children to love reading? I think that we may potentially see here a product of that 'kidult' genre - the tension between the childlike medium and the desire for adult sensibility - mostly something I have discussed within fandom and children's shows which attract adult audiences (SU, Voltron, and so on). The ready defensiveness criticism of the genre incurs suggests that they want the ease of being an established publishing genre read by millions worldwide but they want the escape from criticism that other genres do not enjoy. More importantly at the heart of this is what it means to write fiction for children and teenagers in the transition to adulthood, and I think that the class of YA defenders online are actually morally and pedagogically irresponsible. Either you are or aren't a criticisable genre, and either you are or aren't 'YA' - Young Adult, traditionally aimed at teenagers - and either you are or aren't making money.

I used THG as a case study, and jumping off for this thought, because it is a sensation cross-readership - and continues to attract new readers, and readers return to it for nostalgia. The Katniss/Peeta dynamic remains a relative strength to the series, although I'd argue it is fatally compromised by the love triangle, and I think it has some interesting ideas about the theatre of war - particularly through a feminine lense. But equally the reality of war is entirely absent from it, reduced to spectacle to manifest its thematic statement about propaganda but also for the focus of violence to be on the arena (and its Minotaur allusion), and the relatively isolated perspective of the protagonist within a YA novel. Such is the source of my criticism. But to take it even further, I think that, because YA does not bear enough responsibility to its teenage readers, it is generally patronising with its depiction of these adult themes of the world they are entering. Then you enter the discourse which is 'are adult books appropriate for developing readers to read?' and in which case I would've thrown my Stephen King at you for daring to ask such a question.

These are just my feelings. I fear that a Tumblrina does not hold much sway over potentially the most profitable and booming book genre now around. They may develop further also - I think THG is the most redeemable of any YA, but for that very reason illuminates these problems the best.

[fazgoo-connoiseur-1987]

Okay! Since Eisoptrophobia is done I wanted to talk about it a little!

This is just gonna be me pointing out some things and the wacky symbolism that was in my head while making it, going page by page.

Title- The title page is an allusion to that one Candy Cadet story (with the kittens and the snake you know the one). The main idea behind the comic was that Henry was aware of what William was doing the whole time and this little story encaptulates that idea. The title itself is a reference to the UCN select screen music (as well as the idea that Will and Henry mirror each other).

Page 1: Not much to say about this other than one of my friends said it looks like Will is smoking a fat dart and it led to this image:

Page 2: I wanted to keep the horrid things that happened to these kids as ambiguous as possible (cus I think that's when FNaF's horror is at its best). Cass' whole deal is that her death was especially violent and cruel so I gave her the classic 'eyes and teeth poking out' treatment to make it up to her. Henry is grayed out in these flashback bits cus he's the fella from fnaf world (and also very sad).

Page 3: The more simplified Springy and child on the security footage was meant to evoke those weird minigames cus thats what they always felt like to me. Also you cant see his face but hello Clayton from the books.

Page 4: Those two streaks down the side with the rain are meant to look like the puppets tears :) I don't have to explain why will is purple, and smiling, and being the worst.

Page 5: I like this one lots :) Get compared, losers. Will and Henry are like the same guy to me.

Page 6: My favourite character the SCUPER. I really like the idea that Henry either aided in the creation of or fully constructed the funtimes. Just to add to that guilt. The pendulum is another FNaF World reference. Will is doing that thing where you hold your fingers over someones head to evoke rabbit ears.

Page 7: So this page is the scene in FNaF World where the guy at the desk uses Baby to try and take his own life. This is before she was possessed (hense the blue eyes) and related in my brain to Henry's insanity ending monolouge (where he compares what Will did to him as a wound that wouldn't stop bleeding). Now, I think Henry did die here, but got remnant revived like Mikey was. That's why his text goes red (he is fueled by rage).

Page 8: OLD MAN HAND (his fingers are purpled and his nails are yellow cus of the corpse thing).

Page 9: WAS THAT THE BITE OF '87?!?!?!? Also Phone Guy's death. The framing looks like tear streeks again. It's showing how Henry's actions have hurt people the same way Will's have.

Page 10: Henry gets to find a bit of humour in this, as a treat. His tie is puppet themed.

Page 11: He always comes back or whatever and Henry knows that. He's also pissed off. His eyes also have a little X in them :)

Page 12: They're a little gay I can't help myself. I've always liked Henry's use of religious language in regards to Will specifically. He's closing the door on him in that last pannel.

End: This one is double the length cus I wanted Will to have the space to manic laugh. Will also doesn't take Henry's threat very seriously (that's why he hangs around in FFPS and fucking dies). Is him calling Henry a friend mocking? Does he actually believe it? Does he mean it like 'friend'? It is all and non of these. It also mirrors the first page. We start with Will in the suit and we end with Will in the suit.

And that's it! This project has been a lot of work but very rewarding. I've been thinking about doing something like this since FFPS dropped so I'm glad to finaly get this out of my system. It's been very fun :)

[regularponyfan]

Thoughts on The Bad Guys: A Very Bad Holiday Part 2

“Christmas is officially back on!” And apparently, a city news reporter like yourself has the power to declare a holiday uncanceled. Why is Diane not in this again?

The others’ reactions to Snake getting all touchy-feely 🥹. OMG I WANNA HUG HIM SO BAD!!! (At the same time though, the close-ups on his face during this scene are so off-putting that it kinda ruins the moment for me.)

“That vortex is about to suck in the whole city, we don’t have time to be mad at me.” Sure, Wolf. Act like endangering your only friends isn’t worth getting angry over. You’ve really disappointed me this time. 😔

In all fairness though, at least he does apologize and admits how much the others mean to him. And I love how the other guys pretend to be disgusted but at the same time are moved to tears, while Snake is just like, “Yeah, whatever 😒.” (Even though we all know he’s bawling on the inside.)

The scene right after Shark is tossed out of the vortex without his shirt…the characters look like they’re literally floating off the ground…

That one random guy getting sucked into the vortex is actually pretty funny…in a “WTF is this animation?” kind of way.

“Are you seeing this?” No, Tiffany, all I see is your badly-animated face. Now please get it out of mine. XD

Aww, that’s adorable how the Bad Guys try to save each other from the vortex 😊…Now can we talk about the fact that the animators clearly just took still images of Piranha and Tarantula and moved them around?

How did Shark get his shirt back after all that?

Wolf’s motions as he’s falling out of the Santa bot…again, what is this, the Looney Tunes? Oh and nice dust effect when he lands by the way. I feel like this was made for a PlayStation 2 game, not Netflix.

Wait…so, the promo for this special clearly showed Shark in a Santa suit…but the closest we get to him cosplaying as Santa is him doing a voice. What. 😐

Oh, and since the Bad Guys were exposed to potentially-lethal, freezing temperatures, they all end up sick on Christmas. And Wolf has the gall to complain despite being the reason it happened. Just be thankful it’s only a cold and not frostbite, buddy.

In all seriousness though, I feel bad for them. Like, I wanna make them all better, but mostly Snake. He looks soooo miserable and I can only imagine how as a kid he must have had no one to take care of him when he was sick. That is so heartbreaking. And when he says “Bah humbug” in the middle of sneezing? Awww, poor baby! 🥺

Apparently, Santa really does exist in this universe and the Bad Guys are miffed that they ended up on his Nice List. Which…kinda seems out of character in all honesty. Like…wasn’t them being treated as something other than criminals the reason they turned good in the movie? They’re not disgusted by the concept of good (except maybe Snake); They just don’t understand it. Now I see why people had a problem with this being set before the movie.

And we end with the Bad Guys planning to heist the North Pole…which would have made a much better, much more interesting holiday special. If this does become a series, I hope they make an episode out of that.

And before we get to my final thoughts, let’s see which of my predictions for the special came true:

There will be at least one reference to the Grinch-✅ Yep! And a Die Hard reference, too, surprisingly.

The gang will have a Christmas tree with stolen jewels for ornaments-❌ Nope. I don’t think they had any decorations in their hideout or at least none I could see.

Wolf will get a good tingle from saving everyone’s Christmas-❌ Nope. The opposite happened. He apparently hates the idea of being seen as good now. 🤨

Shark will be a mall Santa-❌ We don’t see him in a mall and the only likeness to the man in red he gives is his voice, so I’m gonna say no.

Piranha will have a holiday-themed musical number-✅ Got that one!

Someone will call Snake a “Scrooge”-❌ Nope. He acts like him and even says “Bah humbug,” but no one outright calls him that.

Also, Snake will secretly hate Christmas because of some past trauma-❌ They don’t say or even imply it, but let’s be honest: we know he has some form of trauma from Christmas.

Diane will only have a cameo-❌ Sadly, no. They were determined to keep her out of this special, apparently.

Luggins and Tiffany will return-Well, this one is half right.

The Bad Guys will have a gift exchange with stolen goods-❌ Nope. Go to luonnonvalinnat for that one ‘cause you ain’t gonna find it here.

Final score: 2.5/10. Wow. Either I don’t know the Bad Guys as well as I thought, or the creators of this potential series don’t know how to write them. Eh. I’m going with the latter.

As for the special itself? It's a 5/10 for me.

Don't get me wrong, I'm glad we got to see the gang again and I'm even more glad we might get to see their shenanigans in a spinoff series some day. And even though it was kinda dumb and there was potential for it to be even better, I didn't mind the story that much. The voice acting is good enough, even if I don't recognize anyone's name except Grey DeLisle. It's the ANIMATION that really kills this thing for me. My god, what a trainwreck. Like, no joke, there were several times throughout this thing where I just wanted to look away because the characters were just...so ugly! I get that this is the result of a low budget, and they couldn't make it as fluid as the movie's animation. The problem, of course, is that the animation in the Bad Guys movie is SO beautifully fluid, even removing like 1% of its fluidity makes it look terrible. They probably should have done what Captain Underpants did and just made the whole thing 2D. At least then it would have looked somewhat appealing.

I don't know, if you haven't seen this special yet and are curious about it, I say just buy the novelization instead, because this alone is not worth a subscription to Netflix. Plus, the novelization includes a bonus chapter of the Bad Guys on New Year's, so there's that. And if you have seen the special, let me know what you guys thought about it. Did you agree with my points? Is there anything I didn't comment on? Let me know that, too.

[conniescove444]

FROM THE FIRES

Chapter 3: Ripple

Pairing: Sam Kiszka × female!oc

Word Count (this chapter): 1534

Summary: Lana moved to the States a few months ago and has found herself in a small town in Michigan called Frankenmuth. After visiting a local bar on her first night, she begins talking to the bassist of the band that played and by the end of the night she's moved her things into his apartment. This was the last thing she was expecting to happen... but hey, what could go wrong?

(This story is set in 1971 rather than modern day so I've had to play around with some of the bands' story. I've been playing around with this concept for a while and thought it may be interesting considering their vibe is straight out of that era.)

WARNINGS: alcohol use, heavy drug use, tobacco use, sexual content (due to the themes this fic is 18+, please DNI if you are a minor- you will be blocked.)

Lana had been living with Sam for a couple weeks now and she'd been embraced by everyone. Danny would be over their place a lot of the time to see Sam and out of the girls she'd gotten the closest with Lori. She'd been helping her find her feet and showing her way around. Lana would have been completely lost if it wasn't for her help. Sam would be out of the apartment to practice with the band a few days a week and during that time Lana would usually be with the girls or just out exploring the town.

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When Sam was home, they of course spent some time to themselves but also spent a lot of time together. They'd began to get very comfortable in each other's company and were doing things that friends typically don't do together. Despite that, they were nothing more than just friends. They weren't exclusive in any way but if they went out together there wasn't much chance either of them would go after anyone else. However there were occasions they had gone out separately and one of them hadn't come home that night.

Lana was lying on the floor of the living room one afternoon with her toy, Darcie sat on her chest. Her arms and legs were sprawled out beside her and she had a cigarette between her lips. Sam walked in the door with a grocery bag and put it down on the kitchen counter before walking over and sitting on the sofa, looking down at Lana.

"You okay?" he leant down to brush a strand of hair off of her face and took the cigarette from her lips to take a drag himself,

"Yeah I've never been better." her eyes fluttered open, "Hey! I was smoking that." she looked at him with a frown as she saw him holding the cigarette.

"I think I've found somewhere you can get a job,"

She sat up and Darcie fell into her lap, she had a smile plastered on her face as she looked at him excitedly. She'd gotten bored just doing the same things everyday. "Do tell."

"So the record store that the guys and I always go to is short staffed and Josh managed to get you an interview when we visited today."

"Seriously? Oh my God that's great! A record store too, that's perfect." the words were tumbling out of her mouth faster than she could think.

"I'm glad you're excited, you've gotta go in on Monday morning, I can drive you there on the way to practice."

"Thank you thank you thank you!" she bent forward and rested her upper body on his lap, snaking her arms around him. He rubbed her back and smiled softly.

"Right now though, I want to go out."

She moved back so she could look at him while still resting on his lap. "Noooo I'm still tripping Sammy, Lori gave me some really good shrooms."

"But I know a really good place you can finish that trip... come on Lana I wanna go outside. Just us... we can go and sit by the lake."

"Ughhh fine." she sat back and he stood up, offering her his hand to pull her up. They walked to the door and she grabbed a suede brown coat before they stepped out and walked to his car.

They both stayed fairly quiet on the short drive there and once they arrived he lead her out to a spot she'd never seen before. There was a tree trunk positioned on the ground overlooking the lake perfectly and the way the sun had begun to set on the horizon made the water look orange. It was beautiful.

Sam lead her in front of the trunk and they took a seat on it. Lana looked out at the view, enamoured by it. "Whoa." was all she could muster. Her trip was beginning to slow down a bit now but what she was looking at was far more awe worthy than anything she had experienced all day.

"I wanna tell you something... the guys wanted to hold off from letting people know yet but I'm gonna be out more everyday so I want you to know." Sam spoke as he turned to face her.

Lana tilted her head waiting for him to finish.

"We got signed by a label... we're making an album."

A huge smile began to spread across her face as she heard him speak and she just leant over to engulf him in a big hug, "That's amazing! Oh my God Sammy I'm so happy for you!" she pulled away, holding his hands in her own, "when did you find out? When do you start? Are you gonna tell Lori and Janey?"

"Whoa okay, one thing at a time," he chuckled as he spoke, "I found out last week, we start recording next week and we'll tell the girls soon."

"Wait... where are you recording it? There aren't any studios here."

"There's one in the next town over, it's a forty minute drive."

She nodded and then rested her head on his shoulder, both staring out to the horizon that was growing darker by the second.

After a while Lana stood up and took her boots off, then her coat and made a few steps towards the lake. She then walked forward so she was up to her shins in the water. She pushed all her hair behind her shoulders and tilted her head back to bask in the early moonlight.

"What're you doing?" Sam said as he made his way closer to the water.

"Get in!" she turned her head to look at him before turning back.

He took his own shoes off and began to walk through the water to reach her. When he did he wrapped his arms around her stomach and pulled her back into him. He began placing small kisses on her neck, ear and jaw and she reached and arm up behind his neck. She turned around and placed her lips to his.

They stayed there in the water for a while, looking at the stars- Lana even swore she could see Saturn at one point but that was most likely just the drugs talking. Sam had been pointing out constellations and telling her things about the moon. Once they'd both gotten too cold to stay there for any longer, the pair returned home.

When they got in they both went to their rooms. Lana was looking through some of the stuff she'd brought with her when she found her old song writing notebook. She'd grown up in a music based household and her Dad had taught her how to play the guitar at a young age. Something about that made her want to play again and despite not having a guitar of her own with her, she knew someone that did. She walked down the short hallway to Sam's room and knocked on the door gently.

"Come in,"

She opened it enough to poke her head round the door, "Have you got a spare acoustic I could borrow? Just for a while, I'll bring it back later."

He was sat at his keyboard looking through what she assumed was sheet music that he had been working on.

"Yeah sure, I didn't know you played." he stood up and walked to the corner of his room, grabbing a guitar and giving it to her.

"There's a lot you don't know about me yet Kiszka." she smiled as she took it before walking back into her own room, sitting down crossed legged on the bed. She checked the tuning quickly before beginning to play 'Femme Fatale' by the Velvet Underground, singing the lyrics quietly to herself as she stared down at her hands in concentration.

Towards the end of the song she looked up to see Sam leaning in her doorway as she hadn't thought to close the door. She stopped playing, a bit nervous from the fact he was watching.

"Hey don't stop, that was really good." he smiled at her.

"Thanks, I haven't played in ages, not since London- I'm a bit out of practice."

"You're voice is really pretty, matches that face of yours." he walked into the room at sat on the bed next to her.

"Is that your way of calling me pretty?"

"I didn't explicitly say that." he teased, a smirk on his lips.

"Oh shut up." she blushed a little and looked back down at the guitar, "I tried tuning it but it still sounds a bit off."

"Give it to me." he took it from her and tied his hair back, strumming it and playing around with the tuners. A strand of his hair fell in front of his face as he did so and Lana reached over to tuck it behind his ear. When she moved back he looked up at her with his eyes and gave her a shy smile. Once he was satisfied he gave the guitar back, "try that."

She played the introduction to the song again and looked at him happily, "that's perfect, thank you."

"No problem. I'll let you get on. You can keep that in here if you want to, I have another one." he got up and walked back towards the door.

"Thanks Sammy." he turned around to smile at her when she spoke then walked back through the doorway, returning to what he was doing before.

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A/N: Hi! I kinda hate this chapter but it's just filler really and some fluff- I promise the next one will be more interesting tho, I hope anyone who's read this has been enjoying it <3

[randomestfandoms-ocs]

What about- What about talking more of The Band? I want to know everything 🥺

the band!!!!!!!!!!! so the band existing was totally @the-witching-ash's idea, they're sort of like a New Covey (and all of them are related to the Covey in some way)! They're Hollis' best friends and they've been a band since they were pretty young (before Hollis' dad died) — after Lucy's games, the Covey were forced to either assimilate or die, but between Jude's mom, Hollis' dad, and Maude Ivory herself, they still learned all of the old Covey songs, though they weren't told about the Covey just that they were songs from their childhoods!

They play throughout the district when they aren't at work, their instruments having once belonged to the Covey and needing to be fixed up. Hollis' talent after her games is singing, so the band is also involved in a few of her televised performances (5 so far, but I have at least three more songs to plan out that they're involved in)

They all survive the bombing of District 12, Danny is one of the guys from the mines that Gale talks about helping him get people out, so they all make it to District 13 and are not happy about the fact that Hollis isn't there! They spend months stirring shit up making people (especially from 12, but also from 13 when it comes to Heavensbee) not trust Coin or Heavensbee, but both of them see the band as just kind of dumb kids and don't take them seriously — they intentionally craft a very harmless image so that people let their guard down around them which helps them learn information that they shouldn't have and allows them to cause trouble

Danny and Suze get married instead of Finnick and Annie, but like with Annie, the band (and Katniss) go back to 12 to get one of Katniss' dresses for Suze and it's just a super cute scene that's entirely Ash's idea!

also!! So far my inspiration for each of their songs comes from Maiah Wynne's incredible covers of the Ballad Of Songbirds And Snakes songs they're all incredible go listen!

(also in the spirit of Covey name theming, all of them are named after folk songs — except Jude but he's still named after a song)

and a little bit of individual information on each of them!

Hollis Clementine Everdeen: we already know Hollis of course but she's the singer and also plays guitar, and the song that she's named after is Clementine (which she also sings in Catching Fire, and is referenced when Camden dies)

Babs Shefford: Babs plays fiddle in the band, she's from a merchant family (specifically dairy merchants), and she and Jude have been dating for about two years! Her song is Barbara Allen

Bo Lockwood: Bo plays cello for the band, he's also from a merchant family (butchers). He had a crush on Hollis when they were younger but has long since moved on, and his song is Mr Bojangles

Danny Colbeck — Danny plays percussion for the band, and he works with Gale in the mines, the two of them and Camden were pretty good friends, and throughout the Quell, Danny is one of the ones really leading the charge with Gale to have people preparing to make a run for it. He and Suze have been together since she was 12 and he was 13 (he's now 19 and she's 18), and he actually proposed to her before the Quell! His song is Danny Boy

Ramona Diggs: Ramona plays the mandolin for the band! She and Angeline are both still in school, they're younger members (Prim's age) who joined a few years after the band formed. Her grandmother was Jessum Diggs' twin sister, and her song is Ramona

Angeline Haynes: Angeline plays harmonica in the band and often takes on a similar role to Maude Ivory in introducing the band (a job she shares with Hollis), getting the audience engaged, and, when people are able, collecting the money that people give them. Her song is Angeline

Jude Abernathy: Jude Abernathy is Haymitch's son, a couple of years older than the others. He plays guitar for the band and works in the Justice Building. His mom (Matilda Jade Everdeen) died when he was young, shot for standing up to a Peacekeeper. He's Haymitch's entire world but their relationship can be tense; Jude will always put himself at risk to protect other people and Haymitch's fear comes out as yelling, so there's definitely no shortage of screaming matches in their house. Haymitch always expected him to get reaped so he's been training Jude since he was pretty young, which comes in handy during the revolution! Jude will also appear in my oc Willow Abernathy's fic (as her older brother, shipped with Madge) as well as in Lysa Undersee's fic (shipped with Lysa and Gale), and his song is Hey Jude

Suze Hatley: Suze plays the flute in the band, and she's a seamstress. She's dating Danny and they've been together for seven years; he proposed shortly before the Quell but knowing that Hollis was either going to be reaped or mentoring, they decided not to have the wedding until she got back (until, not if, they won't consider the possibility of her not coming back), which is how it ends up happening in 13. Her song is Oh Susanna

[thebigshotman]

It took a miracle for it to happen, but I finally caught up with everything!! Woo hoo 🥳🥳 Seriously I am so excited that I finally had time and the energy to get to everything. Thank you to everyone for your massive patience. I’d say now I’m here to stay, but with the summer who knows 😅 But hopefully there’s no more month long hiatuses!

Unfortunately I don’t have the time for any other shenanigans, as it is getting late here. But before I go for the night, I present to you something extremely confusing that somewhat involves the funny Big Shot guy that I saw a day or two ago that somehow gave me the energy to come back?? You may or may not see why

Ok, so I’m a fan of the Fate Stay Night series, problems and all. I think the overall concepts and story are really fun and engaging, and that the mobile game (which I play frequently) is very very good, it’s just that…what it chooses to do with those concepts can be…interesting lol. Anyway, on a forum called Beast’s Lair I discovered a Servant-the thing that protagonists in the series summon that are actually famous historical and fiction figures in disguise-creating contest thingie and immediately checked it out from the most recent stuff down.

Now, most people will go for completely original concepts with this thing, with only the FCs being anime references or references to specific characters usually. However, occasionally a figure’s entire personality and skillset is themed around an already existing fictional character that has been molded over them. A good example is someone taking the Norse God Thys, molding him into Columbo, just Columbo, and somehow making it work.

…But then, holy crap I am not making this up. One time a few months back the theme was biblical figures, which is already a touchy subject to make anime characters out of. Some mad lad/cursed dude who probably did not think before posting…made Spamton out of the serpent that tempted Adam and Eve. Just…what??? No disrespect towards the creator of the sheet, but…what????

The justification is this is the form and voice he is taking for “misleading humanity into eternal torment”, so says the sheet, y’know as punishment. And when I take a step back, molding THE serpent that tempted Adam and Eve into a sleazy salesman type is not a bad idea. But why specifically Spamton…? Why not Saul Goodman or someone else? He could be a literal snake oil salesman but nope! Gotta stuff the funny meme man in there.

The best part is NO ONE acknowledged the sheet. Not discussions, not in the voting. It was like it never existed. The contest was happening not even half a year after Chapter 2 came out, too, so it’s not like people wouldn’t recognize the gimmick. People just…thought it was cursed 🤣 And I for one agree lol

So what does this have to do with bringing Spaul back? The moral of the story, guys gals and non binary pals, is that sometimes people’s bad ideas based around a character inspire you to try and do better. No matter how weird my Spamton is at least he’s not that. So! One cursed serpent thing later I am back and am hopefully not going to disappear for a month again.

Anyway on that note 😅 I am signing off for the night! Not sure if I’ll be around tomorrow cause it’s Father’s Day, but we’ll see! Hope you enjoyed story time haha. Have a good night and I’ll see you all soon!

Edit: Someone else also did a thingie for Pinnochio and made Spamton his FC but at least that’s that extent of it

[eeclare]

Bob’s Burgers Character Bedrooms pt. 2

Starting off with our hot gurl Tammy :)

Tammy fell for the 2019/2020 Tik tok trend of the LED lights

She def made her dad build her some sort of canopy for her bed

And ofc he agreed because she is his little princess

She also fell into the vine decor trend so that’s there

She wants to become an influencer BAD

Like currently, that is her number one goal in life

Hence the ring light and the very bare and “aesthetically pleasing” walls

Let’s pretend that those records are Harry Styles vinyls

She really really thinks pink is her colour so most things in her room coordinate with that general colour scheme

She has her own “walk in” closet (walk in is in quotations because it’s prettttyyy tiny, she just wants people to think it’s a full walk in closet)

That’s why she doesn’t have a dresser

Our girly Tammy is not a clean lady

Like, she doesn’t have garbage all over her room but she just throws her clothes and everything on the floor

But she thinks it’s okay because her parents hire a house cleaner once a week

She has one of those cool vanities with the Hollywood lights

Because she BEGGED for one for her 12th birthday

she wants to become the internet’s next favourite beauty guru so she hopped right on the “healthy water trend”

So there’s a lil tumbler on her nightstand

She films grwm vlogs and films days in her life

I fully believe that she is one of those girls that cover themselves in perfume instead of deodorant because she’s convinced it makes her smell amazing

Jocelyn :D

Her room’s kinda small but she and her mum decorated it rlly nicely to make up for it

Jocelyn says she made most of the design choices, but it was mostly her mum’s doing when it comes to the vanity and wall colour lol

She Fr loves her room tho so it doesn’t even matter

She isn’t as much of a makeup girl as Tammy is, but she dabbles in natural eyeshadow shades and she takes her skin care seriously

At her mum’s suggestion, naturally

Honestly, her mum gives her pretty good advice

Tammy convinced her to do the healthy water trend too

We love our healthy queens

Tammy doesn’t have a full length mirror anymore so whenever they’re hanging out at Jocelyn’s house they HAVE to take a billion OOTD selfies in her mirror

Jocelyn too fell into the vine decor rabbit hole, except she switched it up a bit with the pop of floral by her bed

J-Ju!

Jimmy Jr. has two rooms

This one is the bedroom he has when he’s with Jimmy Sr.

The thing is though, he really hates this room

His dad has always wanted him to be into sports, so his room is basketball themed

Jimmy Pesto knew his son would be tall as he grew up, so he always pushed him HARD to be a basketball player

But J-Ju HATES it

He’s just not into it

But he really does like baseball!

So Jimmy Sr. is at least a little bit happy with the choices his kid makes

The room though, it just isn’t him

The colours just don’t suit him (that’s what Zeke says) and the vibe is off

J-Ju still sleeps with his childhood stuffed animal

It’s piglet from Winnie the Pooh

He’s also kinda a messy kid

Clothes and garbage and Gatorade bottles EVERYWHERE

Jimmy Sr. doesnt really give a fuck though

Just kinda lets J-Ju clean as he pleases

Don’t worry guys, Jimmy Jr. still has bits and pieces of himself around the room

His fav. Comic book characters are on his walls, and he even convinced his dad to get him a figurine of his number one character!

The sloth snake is only really there because Zeke got it for him

Don’t get him wrong, he likes sloth snake, it just isn’t his favourite thing really

But it’s just one more thing he can use to bond with Zeke, so he’ll put the poster up if he has to

(but there is a reason he put it up in the room he spends the least amount of time in)

Because of their custody agreement, J-Ju and Andy and Ollie are only at Jimmy Sr.’s every two weeks

J-Ju pt. 2!

This is his room at his mum’s house!

His mum moved into a house in suburbia and it has a very clean white kind of aesthetic

And she isn’t a neat freak or anything, but his mum does like to keep the house clean

So she’ll go in during the week that he’s with his dad and just organize things again

She doesn’t want to be one of those snoopy type mothers

But she did put a plant in Jimmy Jr.’s room so that she would have an excuse to go in there and “notice that his rooms a mess” so she can clean it

He does bring piglet with him from home to home, just don’t tell anyone that

J-Ju has read exactly three books and he displays them very proudly on his bookshelf

They’re the first Harry Potter book (he likes the movies better), The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe, and the book Wonder (he cried when he finished reading it, he was just so emotional)

His mum also bought him figurines of his fav. Comic book characters

Except he didn’t even have to ask her for them, she just knows what he likes and wants lol

Even though she completely supports Jimmy’s passion for the art of dance, she secretly wishes he was more into sports like basketball (she is a big b-ball fan lmfao)

So she did frame a jersey and put it above his bed

Just in hopes that maybe it will inspire him

It doesn’t though, obviously

Peep the lil heart-shaped pillow Jimmy Jr. Is failing really hard at hiding

It’s from Tina, for Valentine’s Day

He keeps it because he really likes her, he’s just not sure if it’s in THAT way, you know?

His mum makes sure he always has a glass of water on his nightstand

“He has to keep hydrated”, she says

The only things she doesn’t clean up is his baseball equipment

She just isn’t sure where to put it all

The lion is from some soccer camp he did once as a kid

Its the first award type thing he’s ever won and he’s still pretty proud of it

Also hope you caught a glance of the cologne that J-Ju stole from his dad on the dresser

Iykyk

And ofc peep the LED light strips lmao

The death grip they had on teenagers

Andy and Ollie’s turn

Ollie is on the left, Andy’s on the right

Ollie has a weird lol shrimp stuffed toy that he just LOVES and Andy has a sheepdog looking toy, mostly because he doesn’t want to be left out

This is their room in Jimmy Sr.’s house btw

When Jimmy Pesto moved into his apartment after his divorce, he let the twins pick out their own wallpaper

He regrets it every day

They also picked out the bunny bookcase

As if Jimmy Sr. Didn’t have enough problems

They both got some of those glow in the dark stars

They love them

They also have cat and dog themed beds

It just makes sense for their characters, okay?

I don’t have a headcannon for why

The sleep in the same bed btw (Andy’s)

No matter how much their dad complains, they will keep sleeping together forever

This room is kinda Baren

They like their room at their dad’s house but all the toys and stuff Jimmy has for them are from when they were toddlers

He always complains that their mum babies them and is making them soft and while that may be true, he kinda babies them even more

He just doesn’t really know what they like anymore

But they still love him and their bedroom

The boys are avid colour-ers

You can see the evidence on their floor

But the pictures aren’t there because Jimmy Sr. Put their art on his fridge Awwh

And and Ollie pt. 2

Their room at their mum’s house!

She mostly decorated it

She knew better than to let them choose their own wallpaper

Their mum gives them more interactive toys

The dollhouse is one of their favs

Even if their dad says it’s “girly” whatever that means

Their bunk bed is very them

Just colourful and happy

They got to pick out their bed decor since it’s kinda like their own individual little spaces

They’re still very similar though

And they still sleep together, just so you know

But this time it’s in Ollie’s bed (the bottom bunk) because the twins (mostly Ollie) are afraid of heights

Their mum didn’t want to clutter their walls or anything, so she figured the flower painting was enough

Just a lil pop of colour

The flowers are again, for her own gain lmao

The boys have pillows that they sit on while they’re colouring

And their mum would but their artwork up on her fridge, really, she WOULD

It’s just that her fridge is already decked out in not only their art but also pics of them and J-Ju

She just cannot fit anything more

Zeke :3

Zeke’s bedroom is a lil different

He lives in a trailer with his dad and stepmom, so because of limited space he has to share his room with his new baby brother

Zeke loves his little brother with his whole heart (he would die for him) but dang he just wants his own space

Every time he looks at his lil bro though, he changes his mind

He is just so gash darn cute

When he was decorating the baby’s side of the room with Cheryl, he made SURE to tape a Bulko poster next to his brother’s crib

Gotta have something there to inspire him

Zeke is convinced his baby brother is going to become the world greatest wrestler (well, second after himself, of course)

His room gets hot as all he’ll at night so naturally he has a fan in there

The only issue now is that he has to share the cool air in the coming summertime

His favourite show ever is Sloth Snake

And he was lucky enough to snag TWO posters so that J-Ju could have a matching one!

I am personally convinced that Zeke is a Jess-style reader from Gilmore girls

Like, personality-wise he is NOT Jess

But hell does he sure read like him

Just the most pretentious books/novels

Not that he’ll ever admit it to anyone

I absolutely HAD to give him a sports water bottle

It kinda reminds me of those green Gatorade ones that every athlete and their mother has

And YES CHERYL he KNOWS he has to move the weight off the floor when the baby starts crawling -_-

Regular-Sized Rudy

This is Rudy’s room when he’s staying with his dad

He doesn’t keep a TON of stuff here, mostly just because he spends most of his time at his mums house

And plus, there’s not much he can do to alter his room since his dad’s just leasing the condo

He has his flounder plushie. He’s obsessed with that thing

Tissues next to his bed because he has allergies all of the time

His favourite comic book series makes posters and he HAD to have the fish guy

His dad kinda uses his room to put random stuff in

Like the bonsai trees

Rudy won’t say it to his face, but he does not care about those plants in the slightest

He also has never played baseball and neither has his dad? So where did that ball come from??

The car is vintage, it’s his dads old toy

He loves to bring it in for show and tell

Rudy also likes aliens and outer space

But it’s not one of his main interests at all so he keeps it on the downlow

He and his dad play competitive ping pong together

It’s one of the few sports that he can play as long as he has a puff of his inhaler between each set(?)

Needless to say, he does NOT miss this room when he’s with his mum, that’s for sure

Regular-sized Rudy pt. 2

This is his room at his mum’s now house

This used to be where he and his mum AND dad lived before the divorce

Which is why it’s a little more personalized

He loves to read and his mum loves it when he reads so she keeps his bookshelf stocked

The fish guy figurine was bought for him by his dad, he just prefers to keep it in this room

His dad understands (at least, Rudy thinks he does)

I’m going to pretend that green toy is a borobu plush lol

Louise is mega jealous because it’s an official licensed one

But now he knows what to get her for her birthday, so..

His mum keeps medicated ointment and sunscreen on his bookcase for easy access

She is a teeny bit of a helicopter mommy

His flounder plush comes with him back and forth

He really likes music (obviously, he spends his free time playing in his school’s orchestra)

So when he was little his dad bought him his own radio

He listens to it every night before bed and every morning when he’s getting ready for school

Again, he likes outer space, so he absolutely had to have those glow in the dark wall stars

His mum has a humidifier in his room because it helps him breathe at night

Or at least that’s what she says, and who is he to disagree with her?

Millie

Millie’s room is essentially a replica of Louise’s room, just with a few personalized touches here and there

She demanded a Kitty for her birthday so she got one

It’s name is Princess Sparkle Rainbow Muffin

Or at least, that’s what she tells Louise (his real name is Keith)

She doesn’t have Louise’s most current bed

Her parents had to draw the line somewhere, I guess

Her mum also wouldn’t let her get any of those LED light strips even though “Louise has them mom! I NEED THEM”

She read some article about the adhesive attracting bugs and noped the fuck out of that

So they compromised and she got string lights that she literally never turns on

Millie isn’t a huge fan of Kuchi Kopi

So she doesn’t sleep with him

But she still has one

Just cuz

The only other mentionable thing is her cactus

Idk, I wanted to give her some sort of carnivorous plant but they didn’t have any so I had to make do with what I had

Millie would totally have a Venus fly trap and she would keep that thing alive and FED

Lowkey I think that she got into the same comic series as the other boys I’ve made rooms for, so she has a poster of the crystal ball thing

[stepswowdsen]

【KagePro】 KuroEne AU: Final Route Ideas

KagePro Anime: Mekakucity Actors (MCA) Spoilers

I swear I had more rambles about this but I can't find the Notion doc where I wrote it so I'll have to look for it later

I'm aware that I have a lot of moots following me for other fandoms, so I'll put a bit of context first.

Mekakucity Actors (MCA) is KagePro's Anime Route that depicts the Final Route of KagePro where the Snake of Clearing Eyes is finally put to a stop and defeated, and loses his sentience, and the cast finally has their happy ending, putting an end to the Tragedy.

I thought of an alternative to the Final Route of MCA so that Kuroha can still live in the Final Route of KagePro (opposed to him dying a stupid death in MCA)

Like, instead of him getting defeated and dying in some stupid ass way, I was moreso thinking of a scenario where Kuroha/Saeru has to do "good deeds" in return/exchange for his continued existence, out of repentance for his piled up sins/karma.

Like, in the first place, he had been doing all of this in the first place for the sake of his original Master, Azami, (and also, Marry, his current Master), and also so that he could continue to prolong his life through the time loop resets. He can continue to serve them, but this time, as an existence that has to do "good deeds." He has a repurposed role now.

Either that, or he gets offered the option to live and keep his sentience, but gets stripped of his powers in exchange.

Ik that it's unfair for this guy to get to live (or even receive a form of mercy), especially when he constantly robbed the cast of a future, but have you considered that he's interesting and funny, so I want him to live /lh

Also doing this for the sake of my KuroEne ship.

I can't work with my ship if he's DEAD, y'all, I'd very much prefer for him to be alive!!! 👍

I'm surprised I managed to find a "Happy End" for my KuroEne AU since I honestly thought that in the context of my KuroEne AU, that canon verse Kuroha and Ene would be such a "Doomed by the narrative" ship and inevitably doomed to tragedy.

Like I thought that KuroEne AU Routes would just be angst fuel and tragedy up the wazoo (cuz even if the beginning of a KuroEne AU Route starts in a more fluffy and lighthearted way, it eventually leads to the "Tragedy" on August 15th)

Or, that the "Final Route" of a KuroEne AU would require him to finally die for the "Tragedy" to finally stop, like in MCA. But no, he doesn't have to die actually.

So even canon-verse KuroEne can still be together 🖤💙

But Ig it's not exactly hard to come up with a better end than what MCA chose LOL

Like it's not exactly hard to come up with something better than what MCA went with DSJDJSJDSJ

But even outside of a shipping lenses, it would just be cooler if he lived tbh

Like it's just… sm more interesting??? Kuroha/Saeru finally gets judged for the weight of his sins across timelines and has to live with that.

Like his evil deeds finally end up catching up to him.

And thinking of how KuroEne will react to the fallout of his actions and "his new purpose" is interesting to think about as well.

Put the rest under the cut

Ofc the fact that Snake of Clearing Eyes would eventually be put to a stop and defeated, makes sense to me cuz KagePro has always kept the theme of hope despite tragedy (especially since when Kuroha kills the Dan, the timeline gets reset anyways), but the way it happens is just… Nah. It's just so silly LOL

Me @ Kuroha's death in MCA when I first watched it while it was airing as a ~12 y/o: (.) 🧍 Aight so I'm just gonna ignore that!

But really, Kuroha's death in MCA is just so laughably bad it's hard for me to even take seriously WHDSHSDHHS

Like even as a kid I got secondhand embarrassment watching it back then

THE EPITOME OF THAT "CAT AT DESK" MEME

F: THIS IS WHAT I'VE BEEN THINKING ‼️‼️‼️ Because if the scenario plays out like this, I can just easily trail it off to my Domestic Married Life AU (I'm a sucker for Married Life AUs)

Me: Exactly like Kuroha agrees to be "good" in exchange for keeping his sentience and life and continues serving Azami/Marry's family -> Basically a neutralized threat who runs around like a gremlin

They can still have a happy married life 😚🖤💙

...

Was inspired by my other faves with this.

Like I keep thinking about my other fave charas from other series who still keep their core traits/nature and essence of who they are once they finally start to become more amicable to the protags.

Was inspired from Judar (Magi) and Douman (FGO) with this 💞

After Douman gets defeated by Ritsuka and co., and killed in LB5.5, he gets summoned at Chaldea, just as a Servant now, and serves Ritsuka, but still very much keeps the very core of who he is. Even though he's an ally now, Ritsuka has still invited in a monster <3 He is passionately devoted to them, but is still 100% evil! <3

Judar (Magi) was one of the major antagonists who'd oppose the protag cast, for most of the series, but once they're not enemies anymore, he just becomes a neutralized threat who runs around like a gremlin <3

[kittsyspaw]

⌇Hajun (Joker) x F!Reader x Wooin (1)

Push me down, hold me down. Spit in my mouth while you turn me on I wanna take your light inside. Dim me down, snuff me out. Hands on my neck while you push it out and I'm screaming out „Give me tough love” ୨୧

╰┈➤ One of the Girls- The Weeknd

WARNINGS !! : Best friends to possible lovers, love triangle, mature themes, cringey jokes and fights, Wooin possible yandere behavior, angst kinda, Y/n rejection phobia (AGAIN, IM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT YOU READ) and this isn't edited.

Your ears were deafening the screams and cheers of the people surrounding the chained ring, uninterested, you sat on a couch that was placed a bit far, some feet away from the huge bar that also collected some buyers.

They were betting again.

The screen of your phone reflected in your eyes – you were playing your game peacefully, ignoring whoever was getting punched or who was punching.

The person next to you, your childhood best friend, who was also the one who convinced you to join the 'Sabbath crew' had his legs wide open, scaring any boy who wanted to make a small talk with you with those snake-like eyes of his, sucking on a lemon flavored lollipop.

"I know exactly you're not playing Roblox right now, are you?"

"...no, I'm not."

Wooin raised an eyebrow at you, scooting closer to look at the screen, scoffing when you quickly backed away, hiding your phone from exposure.

"You're playing Royale high!?"

"So what?! You wanna play with me or what? The only reason why I'm here is to wait for Joker."

The boy with piercings crossed rolled his eyes, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you towards his body.

You tsked when hearing the loud announcers voice boom in your ears, a ringing beating in your ears after a victory tune played off.

„Flawless knockout!! What else did we expect from The JOKER”

"Can he like hurry up??"

"He can't, he's a turtle."

"He's faster than you??"

"No??"

"Yes??"

Putting a leg over the other, you leaned your head back, regretting that decision immediately when the lights of the ceiling blinded you.

"I'm here."

"Thank god! I was losing braincells with this dude."

Wooin flinched at your sudden outburst, oh, Joker was already here, he was grinning, until he realized what you just said.

"Wow! What an amazing friend you are, Y/n."

A vein popped on his forehead as you turned around to look at your best friend, almost cracking your neck up at him.

He had baby blue colored hair, a scar running down from his bottom lip to his jaw and a tattoo under his eye, right, you loved getting lost in them for hours.

"Don't come here again, its too dangerous for you."

Joker took your chin between his thumb and index finger when you looked away, you were used to it, but it still made your heart skip a beat, panicking.

"But I wanted to see you."

"Don't I always visit you after?"

"..."

Wooins existence was completely ignored and he hated that, pinching your waist to make you turn your attention back on him–only to be met with a harsh slap on his shoulder.

It wasn't very effective but it made him laugh.

"Whatever, let's go before I pinch your ass next Y/n."

You were rethinking all of your decisions back then of befriending this motherfucker, seriously, he's so weird. The atmosphere didn't lighten one bit, oh yeah, Joker was still behind you guys, with his expressionless face.

"Are you finished Joker?"

"Maybe not him but I'm about to–"

A death stare made him smirk like crazy, Wooin loved that face of yours, it made him excited.

Why couldn't there be a black hole that just swallows Wooin forever and shuts him up? You are 100% sure that the world would come to its peace if he, for once held his mouth.

You liked Wooin more when he's on mute. Jk

"I'm done. come here Y/n"

"Yessir!"

Wrapping your arm around a more muscular one, Wooins face of jealousy was quickly replaced when you grabbed him by the hand so he tagged along.

୨୧

Joker was munching on his red apple, the juice of the fruit exploding in his oral cavity with each bite he took, his eyes were draped on your figure, gossiping with Wooin in the front seat.

"Damn...she had prove too?"

"I know right?"

He swallowed– startled when you turned your head to look at him, at the fruit in his hand specifically, gasping. "Share some!"

"This was my last."

"Give me a bite."

He held up his tattooed arm, the apple in his hand and you wrapped your smaller hand around his wrist, taking a huge bite out of the red fruit.

Flabbergasted, Jokers lips but no words came out so he finished his snack off.

"Y/n. He allowed a bite. A bite. Half of the apple is gone. Please elaborate."

"Iwm hhgungry."

Wooin sighed, starting the engine of the car so he could go buy something for the three of you. "What do you guys want?"

"I love you so much I could literally smooch you right now. Get me a double Cheese burger and a large milkshake."

"Burgers."

Wow, its the personality switch for Wooin. Whatever, you were allowed to do that. "I expect my kiss." He left the car, getting inside the place.

"Joker."

"Hm?"

The male waited for you to turn around and lock eye contact with him. "You know what im thinking?" he stopped himself from smiling.

"Yeah."

"You drive."

He shook his head and you gave him a big, sad frown. "Let's wait for him to get us the food first, then we can leave without him."

Your face beamed, the boy still held no expression, maybe its the small things that you didnt notice... The way his eyes softened.

His large hand was placed ontop of your head, automatically matching the smirk on your own face. Partners in crime.

"He's back."

You looked in the direction Joker was gesturing to with his a simple glance of his eyes, it was none other than the black haired Wooin, holding plastics bags with one hand and a cup with the other.

"My Milkshake!"

You took it from him as he handed the bags over to the other person in the backseat. You sipped on your drink, moving your legs up and down happily.

"Let me try."

Was this Jokers revenge? You handed him the Milkshake receiving the food you told Wooin to bring you.

"Say aah."

The driver complied and you fed him some fries and Jokers eyes lit up. "Me too, I want fries."

୨୧

You all went to your apartment when tho you had no plan if letting them in, you allowed it just for today. "Touch anything and I'll kill you."

This was meant specifically for Wooin who had a habit of snooping and sniffing around your stuff like a damn dog.

The place wasn't too small or too big, it was perfect. You were met with a corridor that led to your living room where a punch bag sat from the ceiling.

It was for Joker but he set it up in your house because he wanted to teach you how to defend youself.

Joker made his was to the fridge, putting in the rest overs of the food and taking out three red-bulls, giving one to Wooin and the other for you.

"Here."

"Thanks babe"

You blew him a kiss, walking inside your room to change, not noticing the way his eyes lingered on you for too long until you shut the door of your room.

Wooin soon exited the bathroom just as you left your room. "So are you two sleeping over?" One agreed in he speed of light, cutting the other one off.

Guess who was who. "Then go fetch your clothes from my wardrobe, Wooin I'm warning you. Joker, baby, can you help me?"

This wasn't the first time they slept over, they've been doing it since years so you had collected some of their clothes on that journey.

"Oh and, Joker don't forget to text your brothers that you'll be staying here."

He nodded and stood up at your request, entering your room so he could get the mattresses for him and Wooin who was getting their clothes.

"Why didn't you ask me for help?"

"Wooin. You have the build of a 5 year old, you're barely 5'10ft tall."

"Because that length went somewhere else."

You clapped your hands one time. "Alright! Thats enough bullshit for today, see you–" a pillow thrown at your face cut you off.

"Oh now you're getting it you midget."

The pillow was thrown right back at Wooin who caught it while sitting. And it went on like that between you two until you had enough, storming towards him to smash it against his head.

Joker sat on his phone, texting his younger brother–Shutting the device to be met with a scene of Wooin laying on top of you, his head on your chest.

But wooins slender arms wrapped around your torso, tackling you to the ground. "Get off me! You're heavy!!!" You whined, hitting his back with small fists.

"But I thought I was small?"

He was acting so arrogant!! Your legs were kicking up and down beside his body were squashed you to the floor.

A loud scream made the dull Joker purse his lips, you bit Wooin, his hand to be exact and it made him sit up so you took it as a chance to crawl away but fingers wrapped around your ankle.

"No!!! Joker help me!"

A evil giggle left your lips when a strong force almost made your attacker fly, it was just a cushion that hit his face.

You hurried to Jokers embrace from your childhood friend, sitting on top of his lap so his arms naturally wrapped around your body.

Wooins gaze burned blank before he returned his signature feature, his smirk which was awfully forced. "Let's watch a movie!"

The pool of jealousy that he swallowed down started to take action inside him when you didnt move, only turning around, still with Joker, big arms locking locked together beneath your chest.

His fists clenched but he kept his cool, why wouldn't you realize that it bothered him to way you flirted with Joker? Maybe it was taking him time to realize it himself?

Wooin was trying his best with you but you only saw him as a player, it wasn't like this when you two were kids, you loved him back then, attached to him at the hip while peppering him with kisses.

Everything he went through, you stood by side. His fragile heart that was protected by a cage that he build up only beat for you.

"–Wooin?"

No matter how many women tried, he only saw you.

"Wooin!!"

He looked up at you, now realizing that you were standing in front of him. "You wanted to watch a movie, right? Get changed I'll go get some snacks!"

Joker had already changed, when did he even get the chance?

୨୧

School was calling your name, two days had passed since your two friends slept over, the day after that you three hung out at random parks and you just let them doing their own things.

You hated that deal that they were upon, about the race and everything, they were giving out some drops that could increase your ability when racing.

They were just dogs for that white haired weirdo who made them test them on people, you didnt say anything and stood far away when they did.

Sanghoe, he tried to lure threaten you into also giving out these dopes but you didnt listen to single word he said, slamming the door in his face that night.

There was once a time where you spoke to Wooin about it but he wasn't even trying to listen!! So you just cut it out, knowing that his stubborn ass wouldn't take your advice.

Just the thought made you angry, you hated it when someone took a blind eye to something that could be and IS dangerous.

You pat Jays back, he has been stressing ever since Shellys friend from England came to visit her or whatever was going on.

His name was Owen. Most of the girls were swept of their feet when they saw him, you couldn't say he wasn't handsome, because he was.

But he just...wasn't your type.

Shelly stomped in the classroom, running over to your arms. "Y/n please keep me from exploding like a Volcano!!" You smiled weakly, your eyes landing on her friend who entered after her.

Oh. Owen had a big thing for Shelly but she didn't like him, being together with Jay and all but for some reason he never understood that.

You also hated people like him. Was there something fogging their brains or what?

To best honest, you thought they were siblings or twins at first...

୨୧

You had duty to clean up today so you texted Joker that you were gonna go home by yourself but he insisted to pick you up after even though you told him not to.

It was so hot so you untied your tie, opening the first few buttons of your white shirt that was beneath the blazer of the school, the tattoo above your heart peeking out a bit.

You, Wooin and Joker had the same tattoo done at the same day.

Exhausted, you opened the windows so air could refresh the disgusting classroom, cleaning the desks one by one before moving to the board that was whitened up with the chalk.

"Hey"

Your heart almost flew out of its place, you turned to the direction of the sound and there he stood, the Blondie who was head over heels for Shelly.

"What? "

Embarrassed at your accent while speaking English, you continued to wipe the gigantic board, not paying attention to him.

"You're close to Shelly, right? "

"Yeah, why? "

The male looked sorrowful, sitting on one of the desks as he watched your form as you jumped a few times to reach the highest part of the board.

"Just wondering..."

"Wait, can you wipe the top part? "

A figure towered over you, the eraser being taken from your hands as Owen helped you, taking the job because he reached the last part.

"...what does Shelly see in Jay? I'm much more handsome than him! "

He backed away and you seeked for a joking look in his face, but he wasn't. "Your attitude, its good to be confident, but fix it."

Owen looked at you like you just murdered someone. "What's wrong with my attitude?! Its perfect! I'm perfect! "

"Right, then how about you grow some balls and ask her yourself? Can't you see that she's dating him! Obviously she doesn't want you."

You scolded, placed your hands on your hips, glaring up at the male whos gaze was now on your opened shirt, noticing the tattoo.

"Bye."

Was the last thing you said before disappearing, leaving Owen behind. His hand brushed back his air, anger showing on his features.

୨୧

Joker leaned against the wall, waiting for you to get out of the school. The moment you did, he fixed his posture, taking a few steps towards you.

His eyes slid down to your exposed skin, his eyebrows knitting. Joker tugged on the red fabric, pulling you closer so he could work his way to close your shirt, with you wailing.

"No, its too hot..."

A glare was send your way and you put your warm hand over his cold one, showing him that you weren't freezing at all.

"Its cold. Now get on."

Jabbing his thumb in direction of his motorcycle, you took the helmet, wearing it then got on behind Joker, holding onto him.

It was like a needle that landed on your skin, an icy one, followed by many after it and soon it was pouring. The rain didnt stop as the sky got darker, the only source of light being other cars, the motorcycle, some lamps and signs that were discarded for people to reach a shop.

You rested your head on Jokers back, fluttering your lashes shut as you enjoyed the nice breeze, the constant droplets ringing into the music of cars beeping and tires screeching against the road.

You guys came to a stop and you were convincing Joker to come in with you because he could catch the flu by the way both of you were drenched in water.

He gave up eventually, allowing you to drag him inside and listing to your instructions as you told him to take off his clothes at the do step, not wanting to wet the carpet. You took off your uniform, wearing your leggings beneath.

Joker looked away, stealing some glances only to focuses on the floor again as you guided him to your room, leaving the boy at your bed with clothes as you changed in the bathroom, coming back with towels.

"Let me dry your hair."

As the cloth absorbed the rain water from his fluffy hair, the doorbell rang for you to go and open it. "Wooin? get inside, you'll get sick!"

You took the boy in, his hair was sticking against his forehead as hard breathes left his lungs, checking you out under those fogged glasses of his.

Wooins shirt stuck to his body, leaving an imprint of his abs visible for the eye, his gaze was hazy and you shivered at the contact of grasp on your face.

"Get me something to wear, will you?"

You nodded, Joker exiting your room to see a wet Wooin, freeing his body from the now tight shirt as he replaced his friends place in your room.

Wooins muscles flexed as he dried up his own hair, his glasses long discarded on the table next to your bed. "Y/n you're a life saver."

"What did I do?"

"Live close by, that's what. I was about to become a block of ice!!"

Your lips curled up in a smile that had Wooin linger his eyes on, wondering how his heart hasn't just cut through his flesh and seated itself on your palm already.

You were about to walk away but a strong grip kept your place, your childhood friend made you close the gap between your bodies, hugging you as if you would vanish like a ghost the next second.

Fuck...the way you ran your sweet hands through his damp hair made Wooin clench his jaw, why couldn't you be like you were back then?

It hurt him. It was ripping apart the strings that his most important organ was attached on.

Taking your bottom lip between your teeth, you kept stroking his head, two strong arms slithering around your neck made you gasp.

Jokers body heat collided on your back as he hugged you, face buried in your shoulder, blue hairs tickling your face.

You were sandwiched between the two, heart pumping like crazy, there was Wooin who's skin was like snow when touching with yours and Jokers whos was the polar opposite, scorching like a erupted volcano.

Wooin was trapped in a white bubble, a train of thoughts kept him intact of reality. You stopped getting close with him after he started going and 'sleeping' around with girls.

But oh he could swear he never kissed any of them, he was seeing you whenever he went out with someone. They were simply a cheap placement of you to play out his imaginations on, to feel the love that you weren't allowing him to take from you.

He could die, he wanted you to touch him. He was desperate to feel you, but you acted so oblivious to it, it made Wooin angry.

However, Joker kept his feelings to himself, locking them inside his chest, using the concrete wall he built, denying any of the admiration he had for you.

Maybe he was overdoing it, but you saved him, Joker felt free when he was with you. And he prayed that that would last forever.

He tried keeping his cool but you never failed to make butterflies flutter in his chest, your smile made him drown, choking every time you flashed him one.

It was hard for Joker too, trying his best not to just cage you against the wall and decorate you with kisses and marks to prove others that you were his and his only.

You were perfect for him, worrying and reminding him about his brothers, sometimes going over to his to cook for them and help around, even when he didn't ask that from you.

Joker wanted you for himself.

But that wouldn't work. No, he wasn't stupid, he noticed the way Wooin treated you in comparison to all the other girls and boys (even Joker himself got a different treatment) he toyed around with.

The way Wooins cunning personality just withered away, the way he showed his true colors when he was with you.

Joker knew that him and Wooin only felt safe in your arms.

And yours only.

Nobody else could make these two turn into putty in mere seconds other than you.

You want something? The next day it was in front if your door. Someone bothering you? They were dealt with personally. Feeling sad? Two warm hugs + cuddles, snacks and movies on their way.

It wasn't just you who got this treatment, but you returned every action they gave you. Your door was always the only one who was open for them.

Joker and Wooin could always tell you anything without feeling suffocated or regretting it.

You just understood them, and they understood you.

You were like the middle puzzle piece that held them together. The three of you were always matching, no matter what.

Now...It was scary, none of you able to speak about your true intentions.

These two were idiots if they believed that you didnt like them. You didn't what to hurt anyone. There was a decision to be made.

But you didnt want to decide, can't you have them both?

You loved Wooin, not because he's your childhood friend but because of how he treats you like you were worth more than a gem.

He was so gentle with you and you physically and mentally felt it. And Joker of the way he is, caring, always thinking of you.

Joker wasn't the richest and you know that, you didn't even give a fuck about those things but the fact that he tried made you melt.

He looks like he could murder (and would) but he was one of the sweetest people you knew, he didnt show it but his actions did.

There wasn't a time where you were left out when with these two. Joker and Wooin always made sure there was a space between the two for you, whether in a cinema, restaurant or a simple walk.

The familiar taste of metal made you swallow hard, blood seeped out of the rip of flesh while you bit down on your lips, licking it away with your tongue but it kept appearing to the surface.

The hug was broken apart by the boy sitting on the bed, the one behind you following after. You didnt know why you felt so empty, like a shell with no insides. The sad feeling made it hard to breathe.

You plopped down on your bed, hiding your face in the pillow, you were scared, you didn't want to ruin the relationship you had with them.

Scared of rejection.

They probably didn't like you, seeing you as a friend only. You hated this need of dragging yourself down to a standard, keep your delusions to yourself.

You felt a small shatter in your weak heart, did they love you or not? Because you think you're an idiot for liking them both.

But how could you not? Affection from others didn't work either...it was only like this with Wooin and Joker.

Closing your eyes, you felt the bed dip, an arm around your shoulder and a body laying next to yours.

Another person laid next to you on the other side, you could hear their heartbeats from here...it made you relax, stimulating your overworked brain into deep slumber.

"She's asleep."

"Hm."

"Joker?"

The boxer made a humming noise, he never took his eyes off you, your back moved along with the movement of your lungs, exhaling...inhaling sluggishly.

"I think I love her."

Well, he wasn't expecting a confession right here, right now. "She's my childhood friend. I don't care if a billion people also do,"

wooin sat up, looking Joker dead in the eye, the usual, scary glint that swirled in his eyes making the baby-blue haired male zip his lips, "Im gonna make her mine. I hate sharing but... If that's– never mind, forget it."

Now Joker was left perplexed as Wooin reconsidered his words then went to sleep, maybe this was a sign for Joker to allow his body to rest...eyeing you until his brain also shut off.

He was getting intoxicated with the smell of flowery shampoo that come from you, overtaking his senses and Joker was waiting for you to appear in his dreams tonight again.

Grrr should I continue this? I want to make a smut part but like...idk

Anyway, I hope you liked this and sorry for any mistakes!!

[joytraveler]

15. FastBreak!

aroseahorseboy: now taking bets on it being like Burgertime but with breakfast biscuits Syrupentine: Seriously, three games with a breakfast theme on one page? And the page has a breakfast theme too?? DueyDecimal: Well, each one is only PART of a complete breakfast.

This one turns out to be a stealth action game, as you play as an egg attempting to escape from a breakfast themed prison! Avoid the silverware guards and traps, and escape before you go in the fryer!

Klickitat_Street: Breakfast. Prison. I couldn’t come up with something this weird for Ludum Dare on 36 hours without sleep and a pound of Mike & Ike’s. Syrupentine: This is where you and I belong, Bacon Baconnaise: They all said I would fry for what I did burd_snerglar: what do you even go to breakfast jail for Syrupentine: the most important crime of the day!

"The Shaw Shank Redumpty. Well ya better get busy livin' or get busy fryin'.. I actually don't know what to do here, this seems hard.." Says Bea. One mechanic involves hatching into different things- a bird, a snake, or a bunny(??) are all options! Leaving your shell behind temporarily to solve puzzles.

There’s not much fighting to be done in this game, it’s more about solving puzzles! Bea finds that the rabbit form is good for dashing past the guards and making messes for them to clean up, and that the snake can slither in and out of jail cells to let guards pass unwittingly by. The stage ends when you escape a wing of the prison, but you don’t get a “perfect” unless you let all the other eggs, sausages, and waffles go free too!

"I think I must be the good guy here, right? What could a waffle do to deserve jail time, did their squares come out uneven? I mean everything else I can totally see committing a crime"

burd_snerglar: a sausage shot my parents in an alley way. thats why i fight crime now DueyDecimal: Yes, father. I shall become a burd.

Wing 2 is a whole lot larger, and introduces new prisoners, including very delicate bowls of cereal who can’t run too fast or they’ll spill, and can’t fall too far or they’ll break! Babysitting them is very difficult without the bird form to fly them across gaps.

"I got it, these are prisoners of the great Brunch War and we're here to free them and lead the resistance!"

HNV: The Brunch Revolution! Sharpen your cheese knife for the beheading of Marie Omelette

This game increases in difficulty sharply almost with every passing minute, Bea’s skills and patience being tested as she’s forced to invent new techniques and learn things on the fly! Great gameplay, but tends to make for a sort of quiet Let’s Play, apart from occasional grunts and sputters.

Baconnaise: Gotta get the old gang back together once more before lunchtime HNV: The band, Underwood, the BAND!

[astaroth1357]

Demon Brothers as Roommates

Intro:

So, the MC has left the Devildom and, of course, everybody is quite sad… But this time around, they have a little trick up their sleeve. With just a bit of magic (and training thanks to Solomon) the MC can now summon one of their favorite demon boys up to the human world with them! There's just, uh, one problem though… After being summoned to their side, their beloved demon now refuses to leave it.

Alright MC, enjoy your new demonic roommate!!

Lucifer

Apparently Lucifer is on sabbatical… And yes, he does appreciate that irony in that.

Lucifer actually has a surprising amount of human world money stashed away in alias accounts (because this man renting a cheap motel on business trips? Let's be real) so he uses that wealth to get them a place befitting his standards… which are high.

Spacious apartments in nice areas that would make even the upper middle-class shit their pants? Congrats, MC, that's where you're staying now!

Even with all that money, though, Lucifer CANNOT sit idle for a second. The guy is used to working all his life and just sitting around would drive him insane!

Expect him to still be running some Devildom affairs long-distance style while doing something else on the side, probably stock market stuff tbh.

Is going to want to pay for and provide everything himself but will respect the MC if they still want to work and split the bills (not to a ridiculous degree, though, like half-and-half because that would mean getting three jobs at least).

A lot of trips and vacations too, especially if the MC likes to travel. It’s a good excuse to relax while also technically doing something so he doesn’t lose his mind doing nothing in particular.

He is going to be that strict roommate who expects you not to be a slob and isn't afraid to say so. Regularly scheduled cleaning/organization days are mandatory because hygiene is important. Take some pride in yourself and wash up, MC. That kind of thing.

Also going to have short-fuse for… antics. If you want to prank him, do so at your own risk because he may prank back (and that’s not nearly as fun as it sounds, trust me.)

Mammon

Yeah so, living with Mammon is like the inverse of Lucifer. Prepare to be poooor.

Man has no human money, are you kidding me? Even if he did, he wouldn’t keep it for very long. Couples budgeting is a MUST if you’re looking to survive.

The apartment is going to be whatever the MC can more or less afford on their own with Mammon shoved in somewhere like a cheap lamp… Don’t expect a lot of room.

However, Mammon is great at the hustle. Man can work multiple jobs and actually be pretty dang good at them. For the most part, anyway. He may occasionally trip up and get himself fired, but he bounces back quick.

If the MC isn’t so moral he can also uh… “find” some extra money lying around too. Just be careful when playing with fire, right?

Even if they’re poor as shit, Mammon is still a blast to be around. The guy knows how to have fun on and off of a budget. Lots of “window shopping” (getting kicked out of stores for goofing off), nightclubs, amusement parks, and cheap fun. They’ll never be without a story to tell or a smile on their face!

He IS pretty slobbish though. He’s not going to remember to clean up after himself unless told, but he’s also not going to be bothered if they don’t do the same thing. A weekly cleaning day is going to be ideal unless they don’t mind living in a pigsty...

Prank waaaaars!! The kind of guy to get them both water guns and have a war in the middle of the apartment complex. Good luck getting any rest with Mammon around.

Leviathan 

Whelp, your room is now his room, quite literally MC. You had to pick the shut-in…

The guy isn’t exactly poor but what human money he does have is all wrapped up in his many interests… Merch interests specifically. 

Thankfully, he won’t take up too much space. Put him in a room with a desk, bed (or bathtub), TV, and computer and he’s good to go! 

He’s not going to be a complete bum, thankfully. There’s no way that they can get him to leave the apartment, but he can run small online stores (usually anime themed) or become a streamer. Probably enough to help pay the bills, but not much more.

If they don’t mind having a literally permanent housemate, then being with Levi has its own kind fun. Lots of anime marathons, movie nights, and game nights. Really, it’s just like how he was in the House, but now transported to the human world.

Is probably going to want a pet goldfish, snake ,or lizard so prepare to house Henry 3.0.

When he does leave the apartment, it’s to take the MC to conventions, concerts, or anime stores. He always manages to get just enough money for these trips, but never says where the money comes from… Best not to ask. Could be black market for they know...

… He’s a shut-in. He’s a shut-in roommate. Hygiene isn’t exactly his main concern. If they ask him to, he’ll make sure to clean up after himself, but he may need a reminder.

Can have a fun side, but just don’t mess with his stuff too much. He doesn’t need a Mammon 2.0 around too...

Satan

He's either hatching a plan for world domination or adopting 10 cats… One or the other.

About as poor as Mammon at first, but threat not. He won’t be for very long. Satan is intelligent beyond his years (or equivalent his years maybe?) so he’ll probably net himself several degrees within a couple semesters like a certified prodigy.

At that point, there really isn’t much to worry about (aside from student loans, join our pain Satan) but he can sell himself just fine and probably get some high paying job like a lawyer or doctor or whatever… I’m not jealous…

They’ll start out in a pretty modest place, but there will be upgrades fairly quickly when he starts racking it in so Satan’s a fairly decent choice as a roommate.

He does still have that nasty habit of breaking things when he’s pissed off, but that can be subverted by getting a pet! Just hold up whatever cat you own when he’s about to rampage then declare that he’s scaring/upsetting them and he’ll stop in his tracks. Works every time!

Probably going to be the most domestic out of the brothers. He enjoys cooking (and ain’t half bad at it either), shopping is a practical necessity, he’ll take care your pets like they were his own flesh and blood, etc.

There will even to be points where he’s in bed reading in the middle of the night with tea and reading glasses like some kind of grandma so take that image for what you will.

Satan is the prankster of the household, but he does his pranks more as a way to give grief to his enemies rather than for funsies. Be warned, if you poke this bear he will retaliate for sweet, sweet revenge and he has centuries worth of pranks behind him. Good luck.

Asmodeus 

It's a new party every night, sweetie, get used to it!

Asmo is the only other brother who has some amount of money to offer from his own trips to the human world, but it's just a modest amount.

Is totally willing to work to help pay for a nice place. He wants a building nice enough to host parties!

Would go back to modeling and maybe dip his toe into acting from time to time… He gets a lot of gigs (this IS the Avatar of Lust after all) so they won't be strapped for cash. Which is good, because Asmo is a very "business by day, but party every night" kind of person. 

Do know that his shopping is NOT going to slow down either. Keep an eye on the budget.

He’s also going to make friends wherever he goes so he’s going to want for them all to hang out at least somewhat regularly.

That being said, he can tone it down some if the MC so desires, just know that they can’t keep him cooped up in the apartment for too long or he’ll start getting antsy. You can’t keep this stallion locked up, MC, he needs to run free!!

Being with Asmo is going to be like having a free pass to whatever gathering the MC wants to go to, at least. He could even get them into red carpet events with just his sheer charisma, charm, and er-… “charms.” Who doesn’t want to meet their favorite actress or singer, eh?

But oh, sweetie, please don’t prank him! Life is too short to waste on silly games (he also just genuinely just doesn’t enjoy being messed with so best not do it).

Beelzebub 

Brave choice, MC, but quick question. How in the world are you going to pay your food bills???

Beel is a real sweetheart through and through but his stomach is NOT. That thing will eat them out of house and home! (Maybe even literally!!) Both of them are going to have to work and probably some pretty looong hours (cause he’s got no money either).

Honestly, Beel would be best as a personal trainer in the human world. He’s a pretty decent combination of tough but genuinely kind and motivating. (The fact that he’s pretty easy on the eyes would help out a lot too).

But the MC won’t have to worry about Beel sneaking off with someone just looking for some “quality time.” He’d take his job seriously, though he’s not particularly versed in what the human body can’t handle so only the really dedicated (or masochistic) would stick with him anyway.

“Good work last week, April! You did so well that we’re going to go from 500 pushups to a thousand! … I can see you’re worried, but I believe in you.”

But hey, he can deadlift well over 2,000 pounds without breaking a sweat so who has the balls to argue with him, anyway?

Trying out every restaurant in town would be a must. He’d even plan out vacations for them with the sole purpose of travelling the globe and tasting the different flavors. Food trips!!

He's neat enough since he used to tidy up a lot for Belphie so no need to worry about him picking up after himself (except for the occasional pile of wrappers. Toss those out unless you want ants)

I mean, you can prank Beel if you want. He'll be pretty good-natured about it as long as it stays harmless. Just don't ruin any of his food, got it?

Belphegor 

So… Belphie makes for some excellent décor! Really he is great at laying around and looking fantastic just… he’s not that great at much else...

Realistically, choosing Belphie as a roommate is kind like having a high maintenance pet. He’s good for love and cuddles, but he’s not going to be helping with the bills or anything unless they whine incessantly about it.

If the MC can make enough for the both of them, then it should be fine. They won’t get upset and he won’t be crabby but if not… Oh boy.

Regular job Belphie is a needy Belphie. He’ll come back from whatever job he’s working, likely a night shift, and demand attention or cuddles right then and there. He needs to recharge those batteries, after all...

If he isn’t working then he's at his happiest. He can even pull off being a “househusband” of sorts. He’s not going to go above and beyond the call of duty, but he can keep the place clean, get a basic meal on the table (provided someone teaches him some human recipes), and get groceries if he needs to… You know, basic domestic shit.

They’re going to have to come to terms with the fact that, at some level, Belphie just doesn’t believe in “common curtesy” or “human decency.” If some neighbors are being too noisy for his liking, he will troll them to oblivion and beyond. He may even get sued for it if he takes it too far, so the MC will have to keep an eye on him…

He’s the House’s #2 prankster, but unlike Satan he doesn’t need any malice to be a little shit. The MC will be pranked and it will be at the most unexpected times. Be warned...

Check out my Masterlist for more!