#they really created a character w so much potential and then immediately did nothing good w him. for six years.

[krytus]

i dont know what's funnier. if tdp brings back harrow or doesn't.

[knchins]

Bad Day - Shinsou H.

Summary: Shinsou can always sense when you're having a bad day. Good thing he knows exactly how to cheer you up.

Pairing: Shinsou Hitoshi x Fem!Reader

Rating: E

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings: AGED UP CHARACTERS, c*nnilingus/oral, v*ginal fingering/s3x, consensual quirk usage/mind control, squirting, comfort (w/o hurt), pet names, some praise k!nk, fluffy ending

Notes: This was for a request but I realize now the person is no longer following me. Probably should have checked that before writing this lmfao. Oh well, it happens and no hard feelings. I hope everyone enjoys this piece anyway.

 Hitoshi could always sense when you were having a bad day, even as he did surveillance around the beat that the agency had assigned him to that day. It was a nagging little voice in the back of his head telling him that something was wrong with his girl. Maybe you were stressed about work or got some bad news. Whatever it was, the profound bond between the two of you had him already knowing the best ways to cheer you up after he clocked out for the day.

 When he got home, he found you moping on the couch. He couldn’t help but smile at just how well he knew you. “Babe, what’s wrong?”

 You mumbled something inherently into the cushions of the couch, a mistake as he immediately used his quirk to have you sitting up. “You should really use your words, kitten.” He joked as he released you from his hold.

 You pouted at him softly, “Bad day.” You mumbled, “I just want to crawl into bed and sleep for the rest of the week.”

 He tutted as he kicked off his boots, “Can’t have you doing that now, can we?” His eyes locked in on you, looking like a wildcat that had just found his prey. “Want me to make you feel better?”

 The open invitation had you squirming already. You knew what he was asking for: further consent to give him control over your body. Of course sometimes things in the bedroom could be tricky when he used his quick. You couldn’t use a safe word or motion when he had control over your body, but that just meant that he had to keep your trust. Despite putting yourself in a situation that could potentially be dangerous with anyone else, a villain perhaps, you knew that you were completely safe in Shinsou’s care. Sometimes not having control over yourself was the best type of relief.

 “Yes, please,” You replied with a grateful look on your face as he once more overcame your mind with his quirk. Shinsou had you stand and walk into the bedroom as he followed with a satisfied smile on his face. He had you undress before laying down on your back.

 He peeled off his shirt and tugged down his pants so he was left in boxer briefs before settling between your legs. He looked up at you, again looking like a predator ready to pounce.

 He placed tender kisses on your inner left thigh as he forced you to watch him work. Your legs spread as far as they’d possibly go for him, putting your pussy on display for him. Despite all the things he could do with his quirk, making you aroused was not one of them. He had to do that naturally, which he didn’t mind at all. Warming you up was the best part of sex for him. It always had been.

 Now as he took two fingers to spread your labia apart, you could feel the subtle heat growing. The need for his touch, be it his fingers or his tongue. Anything against your clit right now would be heaven. Shinsou seemed to know this as he blew onto the nerve bundle to elicit a reaction.

 You only realized that he had released his hold on you when you were able to whine with need. Your hand went to the back of his head of unruly purple hair and forced his mouth to your lips, grinding on his face desperately as he chuckled into your folds.

 Of course, he could have easily punished you for doing such a dirty thing but he knew better than to be mean to you right now. Using his superior strength he lifted his head away from you, nose and chin dabbled with evidence of your arousal now. “And here I thought you could behave, Kitten. Are you ready to listen?”

 Another pout formed on your lips as you mumbled a response, “yes…” As soon as the words left your lips you were anchored to the bed again, but he did not have you move your hand. Instead he had you press his face back into you once more as he lapped at your neglected clit, rolling it with tongue and sucking on it hard enough to make tears spring to your eyes.

 Despite having control over you, he didn’t want you to simply just lay there. He enjoyed you being an active participant, even if he was the one making you do it. He had your hips rolling against him, nails digging into his scalp, and when he granted you the use of your mouth and vocal chords he had you moaning for him too.

 Shinsou easily slipped in two fingers into your hole, pumping them in and out at a feverish pace. He built a solid rhythm between the use of his body and yours. That tight coil of pleasure quickly wound itself in your lower belly, pressure building before finally releasing in one orgasmic rush of euphoria.

 He worked you through the high with kitten licks and gentle thrusts of his fingers until you were breathing at an even rate again. He pulled away from you long enough to take off his underwear and sit down on the bed with his back to the headboard. He then had you move to straddle him, hand on his shoulders for support as you hovered over his standing erection.

 His hands ran up and down your sides playfully, knowing fully well that you wanted nothing more than to be seated down on top of him with his cock bottomed out inside of you, but he held you there in place with a triumphant smirk on his face. “You still want me to have control, baby?” He asked, once again letting you go.

 Instead of answering you forced yourself downwards, allowing his tip to slip into your pussy at last. Shinsou was laughing at your impatience, giving a shallow thrust upwards as you sank down further. Your eyes rolled, head tilted back as your hips rocked slowly. “I’ll take that as a no.” He said, grabbing onto your hips to keep them steady as he began to pound up into you, knowing the exact pace that had you crying for more.

 “Hi-Hitoshi,” you moaned for him, the sound music to his ears. Your nails were digging into the flesh of his muscular shoulders, creating small half-moons. The small biting pain of your grip just spurring him on.

 “Look how good you’re taking my cock, kitten.” He cooed into your ear. “You’re just the perfect little cocksleeve, aren’t you? I’m gonna make you feel so fucking good.”

 He adjusted his position, pushing you back onto your back as he moved forward on top of you, never ceasing his rhythm as he forced your knees back onto the bed, forcing you into a mating press. The new angle allowed his cock to brush against that special spot inside of you, stimulating it relentlessly.

 You cried out for him, toes curling as in increased his pace. Shinsou grunted, driving into you even harder as he felt himself nearing his climax. He looked down at you, “Do you trust me, kitten?”

 “Y-yes,” You choked out, allowing him to wash over your mind as everything seemed to just go numb. Your body was like a rag-doll, moving without any sort of restraint. He pressed his thumb to your engorged clit, rubbing a few small tight circles as he forced an orgasm upon you through both his quirk and his ministrations.

 A clear stream of ejaculate sprayed both of you, coating your lower abdomens as you continued to come undone. Your second orgasm was much more powerful than your first, your walls tightening around Shinsou’s cock in a way that had him cumming as well. Your cunt milked him for all he was worth as he panted and released your mind once more.

 “Do you feel better now, princess?” He asked as he pulled out of you and rested your legs down on the now soaked bed. You nodded your head, mind still fuzzy from the afterglow of such a powerful orgasm. “I’m gonna run a bath for you before cleaning this up, okay? Just lay here and rest for a moment.”

 Shinsou got off of the bed and went into the bathroom, running a hot bath with bubbles before helping you inside the tub. You sank down into the inviting water, closing your eyes and letting out a sigh of relief. “Can you join me?”

 He looked taken aback, not expecting you to be so in need of his touch still. Sometimes you preferred to be left alone in the bath, but on the rare occasion you did want company. He grinned, “Let me take care of the sheets first.”

 You nodded and waited a few minutes as he gathered the soiled sheets and threw them into the washing machine. He then came back into the bathroom and slid in behind you, pulling you to his chest and resting his head on top of yours. “Are you going to tell me what had you so down earlier?” He asked one you were both finally settled.

 You told him about the awful day you had, where everything just seemed to go wrong. He listened thoughtfully, never interrupting. He simply let you vent out your frustrations until there was nothing left to say. “Well, tomorrow is a new day.” He said, kissing the crown of your head. “I’m sure it’ll turn out better. Just stay in the moment with me. We can watch a movie or something and pass out on the couch together.”

 “I love you, Hitoshi.” You mumbled appreciatively. He always knew how to cheer you up.

 He nuzzled his nose into your hair as he laughed softly, “I love you too, kitten.”

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[blownbybakugou]

I Am The Game

𝙿𝚊𝚒𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐(𝚜): 𝚃𝚘𝚖𝚞𝚛𝚊 𝚂𝚑𝚒𝚐𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚔𝚒 𝚡 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛

𝔾𝕖𝕟𝕣𝕖: Slight angst, Fluff

𝙳𝚎𝚜𝚌𝚛𝚒𝚙𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗: Shigaraki poisoned Toga, but you made a cure and saved her life. Toga snapped and praised you as her god, then lead you to the league of villains, where Tomura took an interest to your quirk...

Word Count: 2.7k

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: Blood, attempted murder, mention of actual murder, cussing, mind break (non-sexual), Yandere properties, tooth rotting fluff, aged up/down reader (22), slightly Ooc Toga.

The sound of a steaming kettle is what woke Himiko, her body jerking up from its placement and her eyes flashing across the room. She was startled from her surroundings, to say the least. She was not able to recognize anything around her, then her eyes land on you, a young woman in her early 20s pouring a cup of herbal tea into a mug and treading towards the bed Toga was seated on.

“W-Who are you?” Toga asks, scooting back until she was against the wall behind her. “My name is Y/n. You were betrayed by your leader, and I saved you from your demise.” You spoke strongly. “But why?” Toga softens, her muscles relaxing the slightest bit. “I have a proposal. You being loyal, agile and brave, makes you a worthy companion. And therefore, I would like to ask you if you would join me, be my partner in crime, or whatever you wish to call it”

Your voice was silky and pristine while your expression contradicted what she heard. Your eyes were dull, but she couldn’t exactly tell what they looked like exactly, since they were settled on your lap, and had no emotion in them whatsoever and the rest of your face was soft and glowing with beauty. “You barely know me, how do you know if I am as loyal as you think I am?” Himiko questions, giving a quick grin to show off her sharp canines.

“I have watched you for quite awhile. I knew what was going to come of you, and I felt that I should recruit you as my own, since they didn’t see the potential in you.” You hand her the mug of tea you had poured and look her in the eyes for the first time. Toga was instantly entranced, the color of your eyes flourishing and dancing in her own. “Drink this. It’ll get rid of the headache you have.”

She hadn’t even noticed the pounding in her head until when you mentioned it, but she takes the herbal mix quickly, eager to please you. She gulps it down as fast as she can and sets down the mug with a bright smile. “That was good tea Y/n-Chan! Thank you.” You are taken aback by the sudden change of mood, but make no mistake to question it. Instead, you get up to put the mug in the sink of your apartment.

“So, do you accept my offer?” You query, glancing back at a very giddy Himiko. “Yes! You saved my life, how could I say no?” Her enthusiasm was confusing to you. She is a villain whom found out her own boss backstabbed her, yet she is being so trusting of you. As if you were her mother, or sister.

“Wonderful. We will be moving a lot, and before we start the murderous sprees, I believe a talk with your former boss, is in order.” You state, walking over to her with a smug smile. “Oh my god yes! This is going to be so fun!” Toga beams.

You kicked down the door with a small smirk, looking at all of the people inside and giving them a mock wave. Himiko giggles and leaps over the now broken door sending a deadly glare at Shigaraki, whom was leaned back in a chair nearby. “Hello everyone. This, is a warning. Dishonor has plagued you all, and we’ve come to rip it down. If you do not change your ways of betrayal, I shall send you all to a nightmarish hell, where you all will perish in ways unimaginable. But anyway, this is my partner, Himiko Toga. You may know her?” You send a teasing laugh in the way of Tomura.

“You are weak, especially without someone of her abilities, and you were a fool to try and kill her.” You say, moving up to his face, his scarred, oddly attractive face. He growls, and places his hand firmly on your cheek, waiting for the cries of mercy to begin. Only for you to punch him right in the nose. “What do you think you’re doing, you handsy bastard!” You yell, shaking your hand out.

Shigaraki takes a second to process the event that just played out. You didn’t decay. He touched you, with all 5 fingers, and you didn’t decay. “Who are you? And what the hell is your quirk?” His raspy voice sought out. “None of your damn business”

“Join us. You’re clearly very powerful, and we could use someone like you.” You snap you head to meet his daring orbs and glare him down. “You have nothing for me, therefore, I will not stay.” You try and shake free of his grasp, but his grip only tighten in determination to have you stay. You were the one he was meant to be with. The only one who he couldn’t kill with his deathly touch. He couldn’t lose you like this.

“Let go.” Himiko demands, clasping a knife closely behind her back. “What if I make you a deal? If the girl stays with you, you can both stay in the league. Sounds fair, right?” Shigaraki grins, pulling you into him. “That’s the boss’ choice, not mine. I follow her now.” Himiko snarls. “I shall not stay unless I hear an apology for Himiko.” You sneer, pushing yourself away from him and pulling your hand out of his.

His body jerked at the thought of admitting he was wrong. But you were worth it. You had to be worth it. “I’m sorry, Toga. I thought it would be better for the league, but I was wrong.” He grumbles begrudgingly. Your breath hitched, much like everyone else’s. You hadn’t expected him to actually apologize. You thought he would refuse you, and you and Toga could move on. But no, apparently this guy really didn’t want you to leave.

“Okay then, I suppose we can stay. Are you okay with that Himiko?” You question, looking back at your shocked friend. “Of course boss!” She cheers, giving you a loose hug around the waist. “I’m going to work on something. Toga, I need you with me.” You motion over to a booth with a table that was a bit dusty, but cleared off nonetheless.

The blonde female skipped over to the sitting area as you walked behind her, trying to ignore the scarlet eyes that followed your every movement.

You both sat on the red cushions of the booth seats, and you activate your quirk to begin the creating process. A cyber holographic screen projects out of your eyes and you let it float in the awaiting air as you reach into your backpack for your keyboard and controller.

You set them on the dust covered surface and watch as transparent green strings go to attach into each of the devices you had placed there. “Wow! Your quirk is so cool Y/n-Chan!” Himiko gushes, smiling widely and bouncing in her place.

“Thanks, I suppose. Stand and pose with your knives. Look frightening if you would.” You claim, fingers pressing against the hologram to move the surroundings inside.

Happily, Toga obliges. She puts on a face much like a yandere’s and hovers her knives with one behind her and one in front, seemingly about to strike. “Wonderful.” Your hand mindlessly reaches out to the side, scanning her body all while your other hand typed in code to enter her into your program.

Shigaraki’s vision trained intensely on your abilities, his gaze landing strictly on the translucent green display even when his eyes tried to wander further. What the fuck was your quirk? The question haunted him, he needed to know what power you held that stopped him from disintegrating your body, that let him touch you.

You could easily feel the many observations of the others around you, but you pay it no mind as you program Himiko into your game. Well, many have called it a game, but it is no game. It’s a nightmare no one would ever want to live in, let alone see. You were the one who made it into that, and you were also the one who trapped people inside of it.

You snap out of your thoughts of misery, and continue typing code while letting your scan sweep over every inch of Himiko’s form. She had done many poses for you, and you had implemented twice as many into your data base with only doing some slight editing and Himiko was evidently cheerful about it.

“You can sit back down. I have what I need now.” You say nonchalantly, your gaze not leaving your work. “Okay, got it boss!” She says, seating herself almost immediately. “Would you like to give it a try?” You ask, typing one last line of key into the system before starting and holding the controller out to Toga. “This is gonna be so fun!” She excites, throwing her arms in the air and squealing. If everyone wasn’t looking at you before, they definitely were now.

“Okay, there are 31 enemies in the area, all of which are horrendously terrifying. They plan to kill you in the most awful ways, and if you get trapped I’ll pull you out right away.” You speed through the explanation, trying to be vague about the outcomes and twists so that she could not easily defeat the monsters inside of your game. “Got it boss!” She beams, grabbing the controller and getting sucked into your algorithm.

Shiggy couldn’t believe his eyes. Did Toga just get sucked into a video game? This was his every dream, and he feels the itch to want to talk to you and claim you grow with every passing minute. “Stop being a pussy and go talk to her, Scarface.” He hears a deep voice scoff. “Whatever patchwork” Tomura retorts.

You watched Himiko pass each fictional horror character with flying colors, each one of her tactics more impressive than the last. You were implementing her fighting style into the game while also observing her movements to know when to pull her out of the fake environment.

You were snapped out of focus when you heard Shigaraki seat himself beside you and you lift your head lifting up to give him a daring glare, silently lettting him know to screw off. “I saw your quirk.” He says, pointing to the green panel before you.

“Yeah, And?” You snort, going back to typing away at your keyboard. “I want to play.” He deadpans. “Fuck no. Go away.” You retort, shooing him off. “Why the hell not?” He growls, clenching his fists tightly. “Because you’re a dick, and I don’t like you.” You exclaim.

“You sound like a fucking 5 year old! Just let me play damnit!” He demands, looking at your unaffected expression. “No.” You respond. With Tomura’s distractions, you had completely forgotten about Toga, who was finished with the main course of the levels, and was waiting to be let in.

You use your quirk to let the luscious blonde back into reality, and listen as she gushes over the details of your powerful quirk. Well, that didn’t last long due to her noticing her former boss’ presence. “What are you doing here Shigaraki?” She asks, suspicion lacing her voice.

“I want to play her game.” He states, voice raising ever so slightly. You laugh at his confidence in the matter. “Oh, honey,” You start. “I am the game. And you have to be really special if you want to play me.” You giggle, packing up your stuff and leaving him there with a heavy blush.

ᴀʟʟ ᴡᴏʀᴋ ʙᴇʟᴏɴɢs ᴛᴏ ʙʟᴏᴡɴʙʏʙᴀᴋᴜɢᴏᴜ ©

[queenlua]

hey, i started following you recently and ur bio says ur a hacker? any tips on where to start? hacking seems like a v cool/fun way to learn more abt coding and cybersecurity/infrastructure and i'd like to explore it but there's so much on the internet and like, i'm not trying to get into anything illegal. thanks!

huh, an interesting question, ty!

i can give more tailored advice if you hit me up on chat with more specifics on your background/interests.

given what you've written here, though, i'll just assume you don't have any immediate professional aspirations (e.g. you just want to learn some things, and you aren't necessarily trying to get A Cyber Security Job TM within the next three months or w/e), and that you don't know much about any specific programming/computering domain yet.

(stuff under cut because long)

first i'd probably just try to pick some interesting problem that you think you can solve with tech. this doesn't need to be a "hacking" project at first; i was just messing around with computers for ages before i did anything involving security/exploitation.

if you don't already know how to program, you should ideally pick a problem you can solve via programming. for instance: i learned a lot back in the 2000s, when play-by-post forum RPGs were in vogue.  see, i'd already been messing around, building my own personal sites, first just with HTML & CSS, and later on with Javascript and PHP.   and i knew the forum software everyone used (InvisionPowerBoard) was written in PHP.  so when one of the admins at my RPG complained that they'd like the ability to set multiple profile pictures, i was like, "hey i'm good at programming, want me to create a mod to do that," and then i just... did. so then they asked me to program more features, and i got all the sexy nerd cred for being Forum Mod Queen, and it was a good time, i learned a lot.

(i also got to be the person who was frantically IMed at 2am because wtf the forum is down and there's an inscrutable error, what do??? basically sysadmining! also, much less sexy! still, i learned a lot!)

the key thing is that it's gotta be a problem that's interesting to you: as much as i love making dorky sites in PHP, half the fun was seeing other people using my stuff, and i think the era of forum-based RPGs has passed. but maybe you can apply some programming talents to something that you are interested in—maybe you want to make a silly Chrome extension to make people laugh, a la Cloud to Butt, or maybe you'd like to make a program that converts pixel art into cross-stitching patterns, maybe you want to just make a cool adventure game on those annoying graphing calculators they make you use in class, or make a script for some online game you play, or make something silly with Arduino (i once made a trash can that rolled toward me when i clapped my hands; it was fun, and way easier than you'd think!), whatever.

i know a lot of hacker-types who got their start doing ROM hacking for video games—replacing the character art or animations or whatever in old NES games. that's probably more relevant than the PHP websites, at least, and is probably a solid place to get started; in my experience those communities tend to be reasonably friendly to questions. pick a small thing you want to do & ask how to do it.

also, a somewhat unconventional path, but—once i knew how to program a bit of Python, i started doing goofy junk, like, "hey can i implemented NamedTuple from scratch,” which tends to lead to Python metaprogramming, which leads to surprising shit like "oh, stack frames are literally just Python objects and you can manually edit them in the interpreter to do deliberately horrendous/silly things, my god this language allows too much reflection and i'm having too much fun"... since Python is a lot of folks' first language these days, i thought i'd point that out, since i think this is a pretty accessible start to thinking about How Programs Actually Work under the hood. allison kaptur has some specific recommendations on how to poke around, if you wanna go that route.

it's reasonably likely you'll end up doing something "hackery" in the natural course of just working on stuff. for instance, while i was working on the IPB forum software mods, i became distressed to learn that everyone was using an INSECURE version of the software! no one was patching their shit!! i yelled at the admins about it, and they were like "well we haven't been hacked yet so it's not a problem," so i uh, decided to demonstrate a proof of concept? i downloaded some sketchy perl script, kicked it until it worked, logged in as the admins, and shitposted a bit before i logged out, y'know, to prove my point.

(they responded by banning me for two weeks, and did not patch their software. which, y'know, rip to them; they got hacked by an unrelated Turkish group two months later, and those dudes just straight-up deleted the whole website. i was a merciful god by comparison!)

anyway, even though downloading a perl script and just pointing it at a website isn't really "hacking" (it's the literal definition of script kiddie, heh)—the point is i was just experimenting a lot and trying a lot of stuff, which meant i was getting comfortable with thinking of software as not just some immutable relic, but something you can touch and prod in unexpected ways.

this dovetails into the next thing, which is like, just learn a lot of stuff. a boring conventional computer science degree will teach you a lot (provided you take it seriously and actually try to learn shit); alternatively, just taking the same classes as a boring conventional computer science degree, via edX or whatever free online thingy, will also teach you a lot. ("contributing to open source" also teaches you a lot but... hngh... is a whole can of worms; send a follow-up ask if you want that rant.)

here's where i should note that "hacking" is an impossibly broad category: the kind of person who knows how to fuck with website authentication tokens is very different than someone who writes a fuzzer, who is often quite different than someone who looks at the bug a fuzzer produces and actually writes a program that can exploit that bug... so what you focus on depends on what you're interested in. i imagine classes with names like "compilers," "operating systems," and "networking" will teach you a lot. but, like, idk, all knowledge is god-breathed and good for teaching. hell, i hear some universities these days have actual computer security classes? that's probably a good thing to look at, just to get a sense of what's out there, if you already know how to program.

also be comfortable with not knowing everything, but also, learn as you go. the bulk of my security knowledge came when i got kinda airdropped into a work team that basically hired me entirely on "potential" (lmao), and uh, prior to joining i only had the faintest idea what a hypervisor was? or the whole protection ring concept? or ioctls or sandboxing or threat models or, fuck, anything? i mostly just pestered people with like 800 questions and slowly built up a knowledge base, and remember being surprised & delighted when i went to a security conference a year later and could follow most of the talks, and when i wound up at a bar with a guy on the xbox security team and we compared our security models a bunch, and so on.  there wasn't a magic moment when i "got it", i was just like, "okay huh this dude says he found a ring-0 exploit... what does that mean... okay i think i got that... why is that a big deal though... better ask somebody.." (also: reading an occasional dead tree book is a good idea. i owe my firstborn to Robert Love's Linux Kernel Development, as outdated as it is, and also O'Reilly's kookaburra book gave me a great overview of web programming back in the day, etc.  you can learn a lot by just clicking around random blogs, but you’ll often end up with a lot of random little facts and no good mental scaffolding for holding it together; often, a decent book will give you that scaffolding.)

(also, it's pretty useful if you can find a knowledgable someone to pepper with random questions as you go. finding someone who will actively mentor you is tricky, but most working computery folks are happy to tell you things like "what you're doing is actually impossible, here's why," or "here's a tutorial someone told me was good for learning how to write a linux kernel module," or "here's my vague understanding of this concept you know nothing about," or "here's how you automate something to click on a link on a webpage," which tends to be handier than just google on its own.)

if you're reading this and you're like "ok cool but where's the part where i'm handed a computer and i gotta break in while going all hacker typer”—that's not the bulk of the work, alas! like, for sure, we do have fun pranking each other by trying dumb ways of stealing each other's passwords or whatever (once i stuck a keylogger in a dude's keyboard, fun times). but a lot of my security jobs have involved stuff like, "stare at this disassembly a long fuckin' time to figure out how the program pointer got all fucked up," or, "write a fuzzer that feeds a lot of randomized input to some C++ program, watch the program crash because C++ is a horrible language for writing software, go fix all the bugs," or "think Really Hard TM about all the settings and doohickeys this OS/GPU/whatever has, think about all the awful things someone could do with it, threat model and sandbox accordingly." occasionally i have done cool proof-of-concept hacks but honestly writing exploits can kinda be tedious, lol, so like, i'm only doing that if it's the only way i can get people to believe that Yes This Is Actually A Problem, Fix Your Code

"lua that's cool and all but i wanted, like, actual links and recommendations and stuff" okay, fair. here's some ideas:

microcorruption: very fun embedded security CTF; teaches you everything you need to know as you're doing it.

cryptopals crypto challenges: very fun little programming exercises that teach you a lot of fundamental cryptography concepts as you're going along! you can do these even as a bit of a n00b; i did them in Python for the lulz

the binary bomb lab is hilariously copied by, like, so many CS programs, lol, but for good reason. it's accessible and fun and is the first time most people get to feel like a real hacker! (requires you know a bit of C beforehand)

ctftime is a good way to see when new CTFs ("capture the flag"s; security-focused competitions) are coming up. or, sometimes CTFs post their source code, so you can continue trying them after the CTF is over. i liked Stripe's CTFs when they were going, because they focused on "web stuff", and "web stuff" was all i really knew at the time. if you're more interested in staring at disassembly, there's CTFs focused on that sort of thing too.

azeria has good ARM assembly & exploitation tutorials

also, like, lots of good talks out there; just watching defcon/cansecwest/etc talks until something piques your interest is very fun. i'd die on a battlefield for any of Christopher Domas's talks, but he assumes a lot of specific x86/OS knowledge, lol, so maybe don’t start with that. oh, Julia Evans's blog is honestly probably pretty good for just learning a lot of stuff and really beginner-friendly?

oh and wrt legality... idk, i haven't addressed it here since it hasn't come up in my own work much, tbh. if you're just getting started you're kind of unlikely to Break The Law without, y'know, realizing maybe you're doing something a bit gray-area? and you can cross that bridge when you come to it? Real Hacking TM is way more of a pain-in-the-ass than doing CTFs and such, and you'll learn way more with the latter, so who cares lol just do the fun thing

[sparrowofsong]

The Water Damage After The Storm

What a Nightmare! - Prologue

Summary:  Ethan (Deceit) has been rather reclusive after recent events, the details of which are a mystery to the other sides. Worried for his well-being, Patton attempts to talk to him and find out what’s going on. He does get a few hints, but they’re really really not great.

Characters: Deceit and Patton. All sides are sympathetic for the whole story.

Warnings: Vague-ish flashbacks with mentions of violence, blood, abuse, and general Bad Things of that nature. Refusal to eat (lmk if i should tag as eating disorder, not sure). Let me know if there’s anything else I should add!

Word Count: 1k-ish

Author’s Note: GUYS. I DID IT. I FINALLY STARTED THE AU I’VE BEEN GOING ON ABOUT FOR  T W O  M O N T H S

For those who haven’t been putting up with my sporadic concept art and constant excited rambling – What a Nightmare! is an AU where Dealing With Intrusive Thoughts never happened. Deceit and Remus came up with a different plan that,,,, worked! Let’s see how this goes!

~

Ethan kept his eyes down as he begrudgingly followed Patton into his room, taking a seat at his table. He stared at the small plate of cookies in the center, able to watch Patton sit across from him in his peripheral vision, but refusing to look directly at him.  

Why couldn’t they just leave him be? He’d been just fine with spending the last week alone, savoring the silence he’d gone so long without. If he had it his way, he’d still be doing exactly that. It was better than having to face them. 

“Would you like one, kiddo?” Patton sounded tentatively hopeful. “I made them just for you.“ 

He gritted his teeth and forced himself to glance up at him for a second, hoping he could manage to scan his face for any signs of underhanded trickery without- 

please no fake evil not real not real beat stab push bruise blood break pain lies lies lies anger fear danger please dont hurt huRT HURT HURT 

-regretting it. 

Ethan squeezed his eyes shut, his heart racing as he tried to maintain his composure. He couldn’t stomach a cookie if he tried.

Eventually, he found it in him to respond.

“I’ll pass.“ 

There was a pause. Silence was more unnerving when he wasn’t alone. 

“You… you haven’t eaten in months, kiddo. Not even after you woke up. You didn’t touch anything we sent to your room this whole week.“  

Or rather, the spare room they’d created. Everyone had agreed to leave Ethan’s room be after they found him, and he didn’t exactly protest after coming to. 

“I understand that you don’t want to talk to us, or see us, and that’s okay. I’m sure you have a good reason.” He took a deep breath to steady his voice. “But I can’t just let you starve to death in there. You’ve gotta regain energy somehow.“ 

“Is that so?” Ethan scoffed, back to staring at the table. “Pray tell, Patton, when did you suddenly start caring?“ 

Taken aback by how easily his resentful words slipped out, there was a moment’s pause before his eyes widened in alarm. 

dont you fucking dare please youve done enough sorry sorry pain pain blood too much let me go please no no no sorry sorry ill be better ill be better please no please please nO HURT HURT HURT HURT 

He immediately snapped his head towards Patton, watching with learned vigilance for annoyance, anger, malice, spite – any potential sign of dangerous intentions.

Decidedly ignoring the sting of regret, Patton sat perfectly still as Ethan observed him. He didn’t dare risk heightening his fear, though he had no clue where it came from. That was why they were there, after all. No one knew what had happened, and with each day Ethan refused to see them, refused to eat, refused to do anything but sit alone in the spare room, their concern grew. Together, they came up with a plan that would, hopefully, get him to open up. Even if only a bit. They just needed something to work with so they could figure out what to do.

So, they brought him to Patton’s room and let the two chat for a bit. Among other things, his room caused them to think and talk about the past, and they’d hoped it would help Ethan do just that. It almost seemed to be working, too; that was the most in-character he’d sounded since the court hearing! However, as Patton watched his fear steadily increase, he was starting to wonder if this was such a good idea.

After a few tense minutes, Ethan realized that, at least for now, no harm would come to him. It wouldn’t have taken this long before. He didn’t completely let his guard down, of course, but he let himself relax a bit, dropping his gaze and continuing to watch Patton from the corner of his eye.

Just to be safe, Patton waited a few more minutes before he broke the silence, answering the question ever so softly.

“I started caring when you helped me remember that I should.”

no no no no knife dead body blood accident cant move get help my fault my fault weak useless murderer monster punish pain sORRY SORRY PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE NO HURT HURT HURT HURT HU RT

“Oh, by all means, let’s discuss exactly what I did to you that day.” Ethan gritted his teeth, trembling hands clenched into fists as he desperately tried to control his rapid, shallow breaths. “It isn’t like I’ve been forced to dwell on it every single day for… how long did you say it was? Seven months?“ 

Patton winced. This was the most he’d told them about the ordeal, sure, but it was obviously a sore subject. It looked like their plan had a few flaws. "Sorry, kiddo. We don’t have to talk about it. If nothing else, though, I do wanna make sure you know it wasn’t your fault. And I’m not angry, or upset, or anything like that. I know it was an accident.”

Ethan opened his mouth to protest, but stopped dead in his tracks once he fully processed the statement. “…How? How can you possibly be that sure? How much do you even… What do you think you know about any of this?" 

"If I’m being honest, not much. We know next to nothing about what happened after we’d forgotten. There’s a few scraps of information about before that, a few details we’d noticed, but…” Without thinking, he reached for the cookies in the center of the table, unintentionally extending his hand towards– 

danger danger grab shove beat stab trapped pain lies lies lies break sharp broken broken gold blood hELP PLEASE STOP STOP PLEASE SORRY SORRY SORRY HURT HURT HURT HURT HU RT H U R T

“NO!”

Ethan cried out in alarm, recoiling with enough force to fall out of his chair. Patton jerked his hand back as he rebuked himself for his carelessness, stubbornly gripping his chair to refrain from helping Ethan up. It was now abundantly clear that it would do more harm than good.

His broken facade of composure now thoroughly shattered, Ethan kept his eyes locked on Patton as he picked himself up and backed away. Every step of his retreat was agonizingly slow; despite knowing he could actually escape this time, he still refused to risk further aggravating the perceived threat.

Patton, however, was not aggravated in the slightest. He was horrified.

"I don’t think we’ve got the whole picture at all." 

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #356

“i’m just a painting that’s still wet: if you touch me, i’ll be smeared, you’ll be stained, stained for the rest of your life”

Have you ever used emotional blackmail to get your own way? WOW, no. What a starter. Has anybody ever used emotional blackmail on you? Not to my memory. Who did you last worry about and why? Honestly? Myself. My physical health just isn't very good right now. When are you next at work? Do you enjoy your work? N/A When was the last time you ate/drank something gross just to be polite? I'm not sure; I'm honestly very, very bad at this. I struggle big time hiding if I don't like something. Last time you heard a growl, who or what did it come from? My stomach. When did you last make up a baby’s bottle? Never. Do you have a mouse for your laptop? (Assuming you have a laptop) I use a mouse. I'm not a big trackpad fan. Do you have the right time set on your microwave? Yeah. What is your most expensive bill? I don't have any bills that I pay myself, because I can't. Do you have a big yard? No. Is there someone you would love to punch right now? Myself lol. Does the water in your shower take a long time to get warm? Yeah, it does. Song playing? I have "Leave A Scar" by Marilyn Manson on. Are you tired? I'm always tired. If you had the power to instantly transform someone’s life (for the better), who would you choose to use this on? My mom. Her entire life has been so fucking unfair, and she doesn't deserve it whatsoever. Just one day of her being perfectly happy would make my entire life. You wake up to a ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE. Your family is safe, but most of your city is zombified. You need weapons and various other supplies. What is your first general course of action? I seriously cannot even begin to imagine what I would do besides panic and be one of the first to die, honestly. If a family member (or boyfriend/girlfriend, if you have one) happened to be infected by one of these undead creatures, how would you go about dealing with that situation? It would tear me to shreds, but shoot them in the head to hopefully prevent them from turning. I couldn't let them suffer. Does someone’s view on homosexuality affect how you feel about them in any way? Sure as hell does. How about someone’s view on religion? This one depends on what their beliefs entail and to what intensity. If you were paralyzed from the neck down, would you still want to continue living? Why or why not? NO. NO. NO. This is seriously one of my biggest fears. Just fucking kill me. That sounds like very legitimate torture to me. Has any medication you’ve taken ever made you sick? How so? Three, to my memory. When I started Latuda, it made me throw up semi-frequently, BUT its effectiveness made me stay on it. My body eventually adjusted. The same thing happened with my current mood stabilizer, Vraylar. I was also on another, Trintellix I think, and that one did nothing but consistently make me puke, so I stopped it. Would you ever consider being a foster parent? No. Would you rather drink alone or with friends? With friends. Do you have too much time on your hands? WAY too much time. And yet I do nothing productive with it. Have you ever thought about hurting someone? Not seriously, no. Do you thank people for helping you? Always. Have you ever seen a zebra up close? Yeah, a few. Do you freak out if you see blood? Nah, it doesn't bother me. Have you ever complained to a manager about anything? What was it? No. Are there any songs that make you feel angry inside when you hear them? "Eternally Yours" by Motionless In White makes me feel that, among a thousand other emotions that are way too strong for me to handle, so I just don't listen to it. Have you ever been in a building that was on fire? YIKES, no. Are you in an argument with anyone right now? No. Have you ever written a poem for someone? Numerous times. Who’s the last person who cussed you out in anger? I think only my grandmother has done that. Who is the person you are closest to that you’ve meet online? Sara. (: Have you friended your parents on FB? I have my mom on there, but Dad doesn't have a FB. Where do you go out to eat for a special occasion? It depends on what we're in the mood for and what the occasion is. When someone sneezes, do you say “Bless you,” or “God Bless you?” Just "bless you." Have you ever seen the movie A Walk to Remember? Cliche or worth watching? Yeah, it's a wonderful movie. Do you live in a house, apartment, or another type of arrangement? House. Are you one of those people who like to spell out numbers? Grammatically speaking, any number below ten should be spelled out. I obviously spell out "ten," but w/e. Did you or do you still have a Furby? Was/is it annoying? I did as a kid. It didn't annoy me then, but as an adult I know they're creepy as shit lol. What's one event your town has that you don’t like to participate in? I don’t participate in any town events. Are any of your siblings married? What are their spouse’s names? Yeah. There's Nick, Josh, and Franky. Do you know how to sew? What's your favorite thing to sew? No. Have you ever owned a turtle? Did it ever bite you when you owned it? It's so awful looking back on, but my sisters and I kept a box turtle that wondered into our yard once as kids. No proper husbandry or anything; it was just in the kiddie pool. Thankfully, we were smart enough to not actually keep it forever (or rather, until it probably died from improper care); we wound up releasing it into the pond near our house, from which we assume it came from. Do you have Photoshop? If so, how often a day do you use it? I do; it comes with the Adobe photography bundle I have. I definitely don't use it daily, or even weekly. Has your school ever had a lockdown? If so, for what reason exactly? No, only drills. Do you enjoy it when your school has drills? (ex/fire or tornado drill?) I didn't, no, because I didn't like imagining the real situation. Do you watch any shows that you know your parents wouldn’t approve of? I'm an adult, for one. But anyway, I've never watched shows they'd have a problem with. If you have any pets, how would you describe their personalities? The cat, Roman: very, very affectionate, boisterous, demanding, playful, smart as fuck, and shy when it comes to strangers. The snake, Venus: curious, chill, and a bit timid. Do you have any friends that own a private lake? Not to my knowledge. Do you have a drone? No. Who is your favorite comedian? It was John Pinette, but following his death, probably Gabriel Iglesias. Where were you the last time you stayed in a hotel? I think at a dance competition? Do you know anyone with Crohn’s disease? Yeah. Out of all of the shows, movies, and books you love, who is your OTP (one true pairing)? Probably Spyro and Cynder from The Legend of Spyro trilogy. I love them. But I honestly don't have like, intense OTP feelings for any fictional characters? No real reasons, I just don't. Rhett and Link are my *true* OTP haha, but I didn't know if they counted since they're obviously real. Have you ever written a fanfiction? Did people actually like it? Nah. Have you ever liked playing dollmakers or online dress-up games? OH MY GOD my little sister and I would do that together ALL the time. Have you ever sent any celeb fan mail? No. Have you ever gotten a serious injury at school? What happened? No. Do your pets follow you when you walk around the house? Oh yes, he's my shadow. What was the very first social media site you signed up for? Myspace. Are you the type of person who knows exactly what they want in life? I mean, I know what I want, I just don't know if it's achievable for me. Do you have commitment issues? Nope. If you were to start a business, what kind would it be? I'd love to have like my own facility for boudoir photography. I've only shot boudoir once, but it immediately became a passion because of how empowering it was for my then-friend. I could go on a real ramble as to why I love it. What’s something you’ve done that sounds too crazy to be true? Been to psychiatric hospitals like six times. I honestly did lose count. Are there any flowers planted outside your house? No. What was the last thing you drank? Water. Truly incredible, I know. What’s the weirdest decoration you’ve seen in someone else’s home? *shrug* Did you have your own bathroom when you were growing up? No. Does anyone in your family smoke? My dad and his wife. What’s an opinion you find impossible to take seriously? That dinosaurs never existed. What was the very first election you voted in? This past one, actually. Do you feel positive and optimistic about your future? I don't want to think about this. What exes do you still associate with? Just Sara and Girt. Who told you they loved you last? My mom. Your worst enemy? I don't say I have any enemies. People who don't like me or I don't like them, but "enemy" isn't the proper word. What was your last dream about? Ugh. What a fucking question to ask, considering what I dreamt last night. I had both a nightmare and a normal dream; in the nightmare, I was sucked up into a tornado and carried away, and it felt so, so real. I was terrified. The dream is more vague in my memory, but I know I was at Jason's house (which wasn't actually his house) and his mom was still alive. I was hanging out with her and just chatting. It made me wake up in a really somber mood. Have you ever been admitted to the hospital? Psych hospitals, yes. Have you ever built a snowman? Yeah. What is your favorite milkshake flavor? Chocolate. Do you have any scars? I have a lot, but most are from negligible instances that just won't go away for some reason. If you could breed two animals together to defy the laws of nature, what new animal would you create? Putting all impossibilities aside as well as any potential health repercussions, maybe a meerkat and an opossum? Just in general a meerkat with a marsupial tail would be SO cute. Plus imagine the pattern. What is the most unusual conversation you’ve ever had? Oh I don't know. Can you do any accents other than your own? I can pull off a really convincing British one. Do you sing in the shower? Or do anything unusual in the shower? Explain. No. I just get clean, get out. I've always hated showering (the process anyway, I obviously enjoy feeling clean), so I get my business done adequately and then I'm done. Do you believe in aliens? Eh, maybe. It does seem pretty questionable to believe NOTHING else can exist in an infinite space. I doubt they're little green men, though. What do you think about babies? WAY too much work and WAY too much responsibility. Keeping another life safe, healthy, happy... the idea alone is terrifying. No thanks.

[yeojaa]

SUGAR HIGH, chapter x. (w. JJK)

You're not entirely sure when it happened, though you'd come to terms with it. You'd counted the days, waiting for the inevitable. You'd truly thought you'd be okay, but by the broken, half-beating thing in your chest - you knew you'd never really been prepared.

alt summary.  You thought you’d known real love and maybe you had - it just wasn’t with who you thought.

pairing.  jeon jungkook.  mentions/involvement of ot7.

tags.  angst, break up, post-break up, comfort, OT7, slow burn, friendship, moving on, hurt/comfort, emotional hurt/comfort, emotional baggage, fluff, canon compliant, jeon jungkook is bad at feelings, jeon jungkook is a good friend, jeon jungkook is a sweetheart.

rating.  general (for now?)

word count.  ~2000

chapter 10.  Nothing Like Us

"What if I'm not good enough?  What if this happens again and there's nothing I can do to stop it because it's not what I'm doing but what I'm not?  I can fix my mistakes but I can't change who I am."

"You redecorated," you muse once you've stepped into his studio, still speaking in English.  It's nice to practice even if you never use it anymore.  You never really found the need to after your few years abroad.  The most often was with Jungkook when he'd time to call you and practice, but now those days were few and far between.

Slipping the door shut behind you, you scrutinise the room curiously.  It's shades of white and cream, beige upholstery and inviting grey cushions that beckon you to sink your aching bones into them.  A little plant is nestled beside the door, planted neatly in a little black pot.  Two sweaters are folded on a seat, tags displaying exorbitant prices still attached.  There's a row of shelves against the closest wall that houses various books and figures, including a particular Bearbrick that catches your attention.  It's about six inches tall, as big as your palm, and decorated in a mosaic of orange.

"You still have it!"

The look Namjoon gives you is as if you'd grown a second head, sprouted the the appendage right from the base of your neck.  Why were you so surprised?  "Of course.  You designed it."  Reason enough because he's a sentimentalist as much as you are, holding onto knickknacks he's had for far too long.

You study the figurine closely, admiring your handiwork.  The swirls of colour form pieces of fruit, tiny oranges and peaches painted across the surface  joined by scrawled characters.  They were the lyrics to one of your favourite songs of theirs - Outro: Tear.  You'd cried the first time you'd heard it, brought to tears by words you hadn't expected.  The rap line always surprised you.

"Thank you, oppa."  You wonder if all of your gratitude could ever be conveyed in three simple words.  

He doesn't answer, simply dropping into his chair.  It's high-backed and black - you imagine one of the best money can be, considering how much time he must spend in it.  

"So, let's talk."  The words float over his head and back to you as he taps out his credentials, fingers flying across the sleek keyboard with ease.  Long fingers guide his mouse and he's scouring his library for something to put on the background.  He knows how music soothes you.  That's why you were so close.  Since the beginning, you'd spent hours listening to his demos, lending your voice to the symphony in his head. 

You both found reprieve in the melodies, drowning your sorrows in heavy beats.  Whereas music was his passion, his lifeblood, it guided yours - helped the creativity flow from your finger tips like water from a well. Music couldn't hurt you.  You could get lost in it for hours.

"Where do I start?"  You say derisively, without laughter or mirth.  You don't like how the question rolls of your tongue, acidic and frustrated.  You know it's your own emotions, ones that stir from their slumber at the first sound of piano keys.  You meet his open stare when he turns back to face you, hands clasped in his lap and expression intent.  He's like a doctor studying his patient.  "Really, Joonie?  Fools?"

The chuckle is indication enough that you don't get a say in songs tonight.  He wants you to feel something when Jungkook's dulcet tones join the harmony.

Before you begin, your legs are drawing to your chest, socked feet joining you on the couch.  It's like you're creating a physical wall when your arms wrap around your knees.  Your chin drops, bone digging into the soft muscle of your forearm.  You hum once or three times and exhale a sigh.  It's a stalling tactic but your companion isn't in a rush, your little movements only earning him a subtle shake of his head.

"You know we broke up."  There's no point clarifying who he is, because everyone knows.  And truthfully, you don't think you can speak his name, the mere thought of it a sinking stone in the pit of your stomach.  "I'm sad.  I'm really, really sad."  You don't realize you've transitioned back into Korean before you're spilling the entirety of your lovesick heart into your proverbial hands - or in this case, the cavern of your arms.  "And I'm scared, too.  Because I don't know what I did wrong or what I can do to keep the next person I fall in love with."  There's emotion welling behind your eyes before you can stop it.

It's such a silly thing.  Love. 

And yet it has you breaking beneath its weight, sobbing quietly for what seems like the hundredth time in not very long at all.

"What if I'm not good enough?  What if this happens again and there's nothing I can do to stop it because it's not what I'm doing but what I'm not?  I can fix my mistakes but I can't change who I am."  You're not entirely sure your words are intelligible due to the way they're streaming into your skin, caught in the current of your tears.  "I'm so scared I'll let him down."

"Who's 'him'?" 

The question catches you off guard, head whipping up with such speed that you grimace.  

"What?"  Leave it to Kim Namjoon to pick up on something you hadn't even meant to say.  Why couldn't he just be pretending to pay attention, like most people would?  Why did he have to be such a good person?

"You said you don't want to let him down.  Soomi-ya, who's 'him'?"  There's no demand for an answer, no intolerance or force in his reiterated words.  He's genuinely curious because he wants to work through this with you, no matter how awkward you suddenly feel.  He knows, if the roles were reversed, you'd be doing the same.  That's just who he was - a leader.

You're chewing on the inside of your cheek again, twisting your fingers until your knuckles are stark white and straining. 

Did you tell him? Would he tell Jungkook? 

If you were to stop and really think about it, you know the answer would be no.  Namjoon was like a vault - any secret you swore him to would go with him to his grave.  He'd have rather died before he betrayed the trust of someone who cared about.  But in the moment, you're second guessing, the silence stretching on longer than either of you expected.

He relents first, though only in part.  "You don't have to tell me," he begins, carefully, choosing his words like the fate of the world rests with him.  "But if he's a good guy, if he's anything like Jungkook--"  

What?

"--then it won't matter.  You'll be everything and more to him, I promise you that."  A hand has breached the divide, smooth warm palm resting heavily over yours.  It's a surprising act of skinship that has you leaning in, wholly focused on the words spilling from his lips.  "He'll always pick you.  You'll never have a doubt in your mind."

You're not sure whether he means your potential future soulmate or your best friend.  You don't dare ask for fear of breaking the illusion.  Because right now, it feels like Namjoon's speaking on the maknae's behalf. 

You know it isn't true but god, you wish it were.

"Okay," you finally breathe. 

"Where'd Soomi go?" 

The realization you aren't there comes like a freight train, catching him off-guard once he's dropped his headset onto the chair.  Had you left when he'd been engulfed in the high stress fantasy world?  He was sure you would've said goodbye.

Had he done something to mess up?

"I think she and Namjoon-hyung went to talk."  Jungkook's surprised by Taehyung's response.  They'd been playing together, lost in the chaos of Overwatch - or so he'd thought.  Why did it bother him that his hyung knew where you'd gone but he didn't?  Was that something he wanted to think about or would it have him locked in his own head, thinking about things he shouldn't be?

"I'll go get her," he states, about to move down the hall and only stopping when a hand catches his arm, fingers locking around the bones of his wrist and gently urging him back.  

"I think they need time."

Time?  For what?

He's frowning almost immediately, brows knitting together just as his hands do, socking together within the pouch of his hoodie.  With a huff, Jungkook drops unceremoniously into the nearest seat, nearly knocking the mouse from Taehyung's hand with the force of his movement.  He's suddenly uncharacteristically pouty - despite the fact that he'd just wrecked some strangers for the third time in a row.  The discontent radiates off him in waves, manifesting itself in the bouncing of his leg and the fisting of his tongue against his cheek. 

It's only when his foot kicks the other's chair for the third time that Taehyung reacts, tearing his headset off in annoyance.  He'd been thisclose to winning the last match, all his hopes going up in smoke when the younger's incessant movement had nudged his Mei into the line of fire.  

"Stop."  A command more than anything, baritone carrying with it reproach and disapproval.  He knew how complicated things were between you two but hell if it wasn't frustrating.  Truthfully, it had been nice when you'd been in a relationship, because there were no what-ifs, no potential for tension.  Things were normal, if not a little melancholy.

(Though, if they weren't like brothers and he was into smackdowns, Taehyung would've already asked you out - if only to force Jungkook into action.)

Displeasure simmers just before the surface, reflected in the depths of his stare, and the younger makes a concentrated effort not to scoff.  "I'm not doing anything," he grumbles as if he believes it, shoulders squaring beneath his baggy clothes.  Fingers flex against the swell of his biceps, digging into the muscle there as if that'll  sooth the resentment that courses through his veins.  He doesn't like this any more than Taehyung does - he's just bad at controlling his emotions.

"When are you going to tell her?"  Taehyung's settled back into his chair, back to the other as he speaks, already queueing up for another match without his DPS partner.  "The sooner you do it, the less time you'll spend feeling like this." 

The words are not unkind, but Jungkook bristles, pointedly turning his attention to his phone.  "I know that."  

"Then what are you waiting for?"  

"She just got out of a relationship."  It isn't the entire truth but it's close enough that he can speak the words without hesitation.  And I don't even know if she feels the same way. 

"So what?  You've known each other forever.  You don't think that trumps the ex-boyfriend thing?"

Jungkook hates the points that are being made, because they're the same ones he's pondered himself, in the quiet of his bedroom where he's safe from your infectious smile and intoxicating laughter.  He's mulled the possibility over time and time again, having nearly taken the plunge at least half a dozen times.  He could just never push himself off that ledge.  

If he lost you, he wasn't sure what he'd do.  It just wasn't worth it.  (Or so he'd say, before winding back up in this exact same spot.)

"Risk it for the biscuit."  The phrase sounds awkward coming from Taehyung, the strange English idiom having been stuck in his head since he'd heard it a few nights ago in-game.  He'd asked Namjoon about it, playing with the sound of the consonants and vowels before deciding it was his new favourite phrase.  "You can't be scared forever."

"I'm not scared!"  Now, Jungkook's just offended.  He'd weather storms with you - for you.  He wasn't a coward.  There were just so many variables to consider.  It didn't help he was, as his hyungs would put it, a sore loser.  Would he able to swallow his pride if you rejected him, whether kindly or without regard?  Would he resent you? 

God, he couldn't imagine that.  He'd hated your fights enough growing up, the spats stemming from two kids that grew up too fast and thought they knew everything.  When you'd had your first big blowout, he'd nearly driven himself sick with sadness.  You hadn't talked for nearly six weeks - the worst silence he'd ever experienced, so hollow it felt like his heart had been torn clean out of his chest by some sort of super massive blackhole.

"Then tell her."  And as if to bring the conversation to an end, Taehyung drags his headset over his ears, effectively blocking out the groan he knows is coming.  

notes.  i'm trying to expand my chapters a bit more by giving more detail where it's needed and painting clearer pictures.  please let me know what you think (or don't).  if you're reading this, I love you anyways.  <3

[mrsmess]

Faves and fails of SPN (season 15, finally):

Favorite episodes (in chronological order):

15:4 Atomic Monsters - Demon!Sam flashbacks! Dean in a beard! Some old fashioned banter! Meatman! Beaverdale! Love how Sam starts arguing w the parents in the parking lot - Me too, Sam, me too. Loving the self-aware monster. I know Becky is problematique™, but I dig her, so, all kinds of fuck Chuck. He must die, and when he does this is the episode I’ll think about.

15:6 Golden Time - Badass protection spells. Dean in a robe and a hot dog pyjamas. Cas going by Clarence. Jogging Sam. Eileen! God I ship her and Sam, and I’d like to take this opportunity to remind you that I don’t ship him w anyone. Liking this ep a lot, every little side plot. Nice. And Eileen is back and I know it won’t last but like, that was awesome.

15:10 The Heroes’ Journey - Pretty neat intro. Monster on monster violence to the sound of Clair the Lune. Oh, and excellent casting of Garth’s kids. Regular people trouble... Awesome! Brilliant! This is the kind of meta storylines this show should deal in, exclusively. Oh my Garth! Explosives! Why isn’t every episode like this?

15:11 The Gamblers - Oh, is this another lucky coin episode? In that case yes please! More inconsequential bullshit kindly! Loving Sam staying in touch w Eileen. Hey guys, remember when you did the gambling thing w your years? And the rabbit’s foot? Good times. Will this be an equally good time? I hope so. A god! Excellent. ”Lady, I’m Tolstoy.” Yeah ya are, and i’m dead. The guys and Fortuna bashing god. And I'm equally delighted and distraught over the lore that god created man, man imagined gods and god decided to create the other gods to play into man’s ideas, or as a distraction.

15:13 Destiny’s Child - Omg the intro! Savage garden! I’m dead. Jack w the sandwich, why is that so funny? Cas is a gem this episode! ”’Sexually intimate’?” Lol. That’s what you get for trying to speak plainly, Cas! Hunter Corp. I’m dead, again. Keep the different Deans and Sams coming! I’m digging this! Why would they send ‘em to Rio? They could be your buffy-bots!

15:14 Last Holiday - Weird people popping up in the hq is awesome. And Dean’s immediate instinct to yell for Sam reminds me of me calling mr mess for everything! ”Shouldnt you be in the woods? Nymfing?” Monster radar? Oh, oh this is excellent. So mrs Butters is capable of murder when home and family are threatened, good for her. They better not kill her. I can accept them returning her to the wild. Yes! Did I call it or did I call it? Good Supernatural, good boy! And Dean making a cake for Jack! My heart.

Fail episodes (in chronological order):

15:2 Raising Hell - Rowena! Instant win. Ketch. Instant lose. Ketch undressing Rowena with his eyes = rating plummeting. Jeez. A bit dangerous even joking about the GoT finale, don’t you think? Rowena and Ketch full on flirting... this is hell, I'm being punished.

15:3 The Rupture - Don’t call him god! His name is Sucky-Chucky. The shock of Cas! “You’ve been playing us the whole time!” This is how it works Cas, where have you been? They're always solving problems like Jason Mendoza. In-Dean-angry-voice: “Anytime I had a problem and I threw a Molotov cocktail, boom! Right away, I had a different problem.” Rowena! And Sam! No!

15:5 Proverbs 17:3 - Listen, spn, it’s your last season and if you like just wanna stop writing and casting women completely rn i won't stop you or hold it against you (also why are these ladies identical?). We’ve had a terrible run but lets just let bygones be bygones.

15:8 Our father, who aren’t in heaven - Gosh, having Eileen in the show is painful, I’m just constantly expecting a piano to fall on her head. *Ugh* Sucky-yucky-Chucky. But hey, at least everybody else looks better alongside him. Case and point: I never rly cared that much for Donatello, but it’s great to see him, and Michael’s back, sure is nice to see him too.

15:9 The trap - Ugh. Main plot shit and Sucky-yucky-fucking-Chucky. Fail. Although the flashforward to jan 6th 2021 was a hoot (but probably not meant like one, huh?) Dean’s monologue in purgatory though... gosh. This show would be nothing w/o Jensen Ackles. Omg the kiss! Nice. However, the show at this point has lost the ability to offer any sort of pleasure. Because like Sam, we know which way this will go. They used to have some hedonism working for the characters but now they don’t even have that.

15:20 Carry on - You know what? I’m not gonna make this post longer than it already is talking about the last episode of Supernatural, that has been done better by people w real grievances w the show. The kindest thing you can say about the finale is that it just as well could’ve been jammed into a few extra minutes added to the previous episode.

Mediocre mentions:

Drag me away (from you) - what is this ugly cell interface? The opposite of product placement. Yay! Retro episode! And they got the same actor to play Dean, neato! Dean admitting he had a hard time handling hunting, that always gets me. Woah! That scream effect without reverb was kinda startling. And the camera zooming in on the little porcelain clown even though Sam is nowhere n- oh shit. This was an interesting episode

Inherit the earth - Goooood I hate Chucky. Barefoot Sam is okay though. Digging this soundtrack too. Very un-Supernatural. Nice to meet ya Betty, but I wouldn’t pull up a chair if I were you. Always a fan of the shiteating grin. Jack, stripping god of his power, that’s so hot. And again: kudos to the soundtrack! The Youngbloods and then Jackson freakin’ Browne! And you know, it’s clichéd and kinda vacant, but also kinda nice. I’m cool with the story ending like this. Why did they have to do another one? Supernatural has never known when to quit, and this is the very real backside of this.

Honorable mentions:

I don’t know who this Ardat chick is but killing Ketch puts her instantly in my win column.

Winchester-dumb, new household term.

”Feels like were taking a big, probably stupid risk. Feels good.” That made me feel good too.

I’m vastly enjoying this dark-art hippie couple in Unity and Jack’s interaction w them.

Cas launching straight into his dramatic I-will-not-let-you-end-your-own-life-speech when Sam casually mentions he’d like to talk to death in Unity, that angel has seen some things, and he has learned.

Those are some pretty pretty death effects on Jack in Despair/The Truth.

Obviously Misha Collins

Things that makes you go hmm:

Which of the clowns is this supposed to be in Back and to the Future? Because the one from season 2 was a monster, right? So he would’ve gone to purgatory. You know what? I’m not an expert. I try to not pay too much attention ’cause it makes me funny in the head. But just, y’know, a general objection.

Here’s my deal w death as a looming threat in this show: it holds no weight. And even if it did it has been painted as the ultimate relief, unless you go to hell, these characters know for a fact that there’s a potentially blissful afterlife, so their attitude towards death should be, what? More pragmatic, I think. And it’s partly why Ackles is wasted on this show; That man can deliver a death monologue like it’s nobody’s business, too bad all those words have been rendered meaningless after 15 seasons of this shit!

Summing up:

So, I did not go into or leave this season happy, I knew how it would end and I was sad for everyone the show screwed over (more than it already had). Which really meant that I always had to force myself to watch another episode, knowing what was coming. But I had to see it through. I did, so I’ll give myself a pat on the back and get to work on my own personal selection of episodes that will henceforth represent spn to me. A selection I’ll enjoy all the way through. All in all I think the most frustrating thing about the show is how it insists on taking itself so freakin’ seriously. It has always done horror *and* humor best and this whole heaven and hell aspect has never sat right w me, and in any case they should’ve leaned more on “supernatural” narrative tropes (if you will) getting out of their plot problems, gambled some more and thought a bit more outside genre conventions *especially* in their main arcs, they opened up so many opportunities that they never even used. They could’ve been more like Buffy, or Doctor Who. That said, I’ll always get that spn-itch, and when I do, I’ll be happy to have seen all the episodes so I’ll know which ones to avoid.

[ratspberry]

many naruto thoughts head overloading

ok im only like 20 episodes into shippuden and i skipped a Lot of filler in original naruto bc i do not have the patience </3 (i will come back to the filler one day though) and while i love this anime theres so much i wish... was not written how it is

first of all sakura... i love her sm and i just wish her character was given some more care like at this point in shippuden im actually really enjoying the direction shes taken but i heard a lot of her growth is sidelined when sasuke comes back into the picture and thats my biggest issue. im sorry but if youre going to introduce a TRIO of main characters i want to see that main group equally fleshed out. first going all the way back to the beginning i wish that sakura was allowed to fight??? like we KNOW shes super smart and has powerful chakra so even when at that time she wasnt the most skilled fighter (as far as we KNOW at least. given that we barely got to see her fight who knows!) she couldve in the very least played a similar role to that of shikamaru as far as leadership and strategizing. and ok her crush on sasuke should have dissipated a lot more after the chunin exams. even though i do hate to see her spend so much time fawning over sasuke when hes not even particularly kind to her i think a crush in the beginning could still work IF the moment of her cutting her hair (“sasuke likes girls with long hair”) and her battle w ino during the chunin exams were like an eye-opening moment for her when she was like “wtf am i doing i am going to work hard as a ninja to prove that i can do this to MYSELF and MY RIVAL first” (which. ok she does get to this point later and again i love her learning chakra and getting strong as HELL during her training w tsunade but again. i want to see that REMAIN parallel to the enormous power level leaps that sasuke and naruto make. also let sakura and ino have a fun friendship rivalry that has nothing to do w sasuke) . i think it would be better if she naruto and sasuke were just friends who ALL help and motivate each other. and so when sasuke leaves sakura is STILL super fucked up over it and maybe even has a hard time trusting naruto again after he comes back? (but ofc she eventually does bc power of friendship) like IDK loss of one best friend, then almost immediately after your other best friend (who u just learned secretly is sealed w the nine tails and the akatsuki is after him just like orochimaru was after sasuke) leaves you for THREE YEARS??? kind of a salt in the wound moment! also im simply not even going to touch on all the comphet marriages in the end

next im going to talk about rock lee my friend rock lee who i adore. anyways he either should not have foregone the surgery from tsunade or died from it. HEAR ME OUT! this surgery was good in showing how powerful tsunade is as a healer but like? was it necessary? after she brought naruto back to life??? as far as lees characterization his whole thing is that he may not have special jutsu or the same prodigal abilities as his peers but he can still be as powerful or more powerful! and idk i hate when characters have serious life changing stuff done to them and not seeing it fully explored in the story. like ok so we’ve got tsunade telling lee (who cant be older than 12? 13?) theres a 50/50 chance he’ll die in the surgery to heal him. and then guy ENCOURAGES HIM, HIS FAVORITE STUDENT, to go through with the surgery so he could then go on to be a ninja and continue risking his life?????? so i thought that was pretty screwed up. which leads me to the two paths that i think would be interesting to see play out: 1. lee doesnt get the surgery, but continues to train as a ninja. his injuries still exist but lee learns to fight WITH the injuries and creates a really cool badass unique fighting style and goes on to be a great ninja like he dreamed 2. lee dies in surgery. id hate it i would and i dont WANT lee to die but it might be a fuckin wakeup call to all these adult ninjas urging kids into warfare. lee is beloved by all so it would be a good moment of pause for everyone to think like “ummm so the systems that be are kind of majorly fucked up.”

those are the two main ideas i had but heres a few misc things:

-jiraiya can be the author of as many trashy romance novels as he wants but him hitting on younger women and being like a peeping tom and UGH the way he was introduced w narutos ‘sexy jutsu’ is just. not good. take it out.

-let tsunade look her age. like the whole “she uses her chakra to make herself look young”? i dont buy it. i dont care that you just didnt feel like drawing a woman who looks over 20. you will do it anyways bc i said so.

-i dont dislike n/ruhina as much as i dislike s/susaku bc at least its clear theres a mutual respect and admiration there but hinata, like sakura, has so much more potential to be explored. idk if its looked at in filler or later in shippuden (id sure hope so) but i think her parallel to sasuke is kind of interesting? both have intimidating, extremely powerful older brothers (i know neji is technically hinatas cousin or smth but whatever older brother figures. also i know hinatas sister is also supposed to be super powerful but idk her yet) who are held in high esteem by their families and have all this pressure on their shoulders to want to surpass them? given that neji didnt um. do the things itachi did clearly its not the SAME between hinata and sasuke but i feel like examining the hyuga family dynamics would be SO interesting in comparison to sasukes arc. i didnt mind seeing hinata motivated by naruto the first few times but like. there is SO MUCH MORE THERE than JUST hinatas relationship to naruto.

-all of these kids need therapy but ESPECIALLY sasuke like the signs were there. halfway thru the bell test thing SUPER early on sasuke went into a full-fledged “i am an avenger.. i have to kill a certain someone” monologue and given the fact that everyone knows his entire clan was killed and that sasuke is likely VERY traumatized... who thought it was a good idea to let him become a ninja before addressing any of that. my god. like i love kakashi and i know he has his own devestating backstory and that hes a product of the system but why the Fuck would he let sasuke take the chunin exams. give team 7 a year more of training and getting to know each other and give sasuke some time to create bonds and maybe even open up emotionally and begin to heal and then MAYBE we can THINK ab chunin exams.

-asuma and ino apologize to choji for telling him not to eat as much challenge? did asuma not know that chojis clan uses food to replenish their chakra? it would make sense if ino didnt know but chojis teacher?? either way still p fucked, leave choji alone

-speaking of ino i want more of her character tok. why was she not included in that mission to save sasuke that shikamaru, her TEAMMATE, led?? was there an explanation for that?? i feel like her not being there was a missed opportunity for some real growth/bonding between team 10.

-speaking of the last bullet point shikamaru being like “ugh women 🙄” is tired and boring. very misogynistic “i hate my wife” facebook dad humor. cut that shit out

-orochimarus coding and his whole um. intent as a villain is just very. Hm. i dont think i like that very much but im not going to go into it bc im sure its been touched upon a million times

[tfw-needs-baby]

sam winchester | internet personas

based on my own experience. 

read on ao3? 

Sam Winchester and his brother stumbled upon fanfiction and the fandom a while ago. He swore to himself that he would never, ever go back and visit the crazy people that existed there. 

Well, sitting in his room in the bunker, he was bored and had nothing much to do because the supernatural had been pretty quiet for the past month or so and he was scrolling aimlessly through new articles and finding nothing. He doesn’t know how or why the idea popped into his head, but it came and he was curious at the time, so why not? 

‘Best places to’ Nope, delete that. 

‘Where to join a fandom’ Delete that too. That just sounded stupid. 

‘Fandom friendly sites.’ Yeah, that sounded about right. He clicked onto the first link, and it immediately brought him to a site called ‘Fandom.’ 

How ironic. Although it didn’t exactly help him much, it was just an explanation guide to their platform and what it had to offer. The rest of the links weren’t much help either, and he sighed. Alright, how to find the fans...wasn’t there something called livejournal? 

According to a couple of articles, old and inactive journals had been purged, but were still doing pretty well. And then, the Winchester searched up ‘best places to read fanfiction.’ 

A couple of suggestions appeared underneath ‘Popular on the web.’ 

‘Wattpad - tumblr - kindle words - deviantart - archive of our own - asianfanfics’ 

Huh. Visiting a couple of sites, Wattpad and Fanfiction.net and Archive Of Our Own popped up frequently, so he decided to visit Wattpad first. He went to browse works and choose fanfiction, and it brought him to a selection of hot and trendy stories with millions of views on them. Woah. It ranged from k-pop to a selection of animes to CBS shows and weird crossovers. The ‘x reader’ tag seemed very popular and he shivered, reminding him of Becky. 

Signing up wasn’t hard either. It had only taken him a couple of minutes. But when he was reading a selected few from the hot section, they didn’t exactly grab his attention. A lot of them seemed to be written by younger ten to fifteen year olds. They did have a large amount of potential and amazing storylines, he’ll give them that. 

Then he wandered over to Fanfiction.net. The sign up process was easy, but the site was a bit more historical and a bit more him. There were multiple forums, and he scrolled down and viewed a couple of them. Oh. They were similar to roleplay, but just - more building along a storyline with it, if that made any sense. The sign up was pretty easy here too, and he smiled as two notifications popped up in his gmail for both sites. 

Backtracking now, he went off to ‘archive of our own,’ nicknamed ‘ao3’ for short and a paragraph popped up and he skimmed through it quickly. It was just a warning that everything could be viewed by whoever and whatnot. The writing here definitely seems way more advanced, way more complex and interesting, with canon divergences going all out and unheard au’s. And the cliche plots we’re simply adorable. 

He went over to sign up, and raised an eyebrow when it stated that you needed to get an invitation, and all you had to do was enter in an email. And wait a day for an invitation. 

Hopping onto tumblr, he made an account quickly and started scrolling through it, and everything seemed different somehow. Like, more modern day than the last time he came to the page. The fandom had definitely become smaller due to a ‘nsfw ban’ and he couldn’t decide whether that was a good or bad thing. They had gifsets of memories that had happened about three years ago, with their final stand against Chuck, and he smiled as he went through year’s old blogs that never updated anymore, reblogging everything ‘Supernatural’ underneath the username ‘babytrenchcoatnougat’ and he started to tear up when he stumbled upon a post where they had created a small art of playing the rainbow slinky with Dean based on a gifset of a memory. He still remembers how happy Dean had been when he got it just for him, he played with it for the next week. 

A couple of week’s later, Sam want’s to do more than reblog and comment on content. Sam does have artistic potential, and he could definitely look into that. Although, writing seems easier at the moment, and he scrolls through an endless amount of fanfiction on archive of our own - ranging from major character death to general fanfiction - from his brother and best friend sleeping together to him turning into the boyking to high school universes to Apocalyptic worlds where they have failed.

He wants to write his own world, where they’re all happy and care-free and able to actually live happily, where no one he’s loved has died. Making a post on tumblr he states: By any chance, is there anyone on this platform that can help me with a non-romantic general Supernatural fanfiction?

He places a couple of normal tags that fit into the category, then presses post. About an hour later, he gets a reblog from someone called @ misha-moose-dean-burger-lover [and wow, that sounds like a handful] offering to help. 

I’m available if you need me to, @ babytrenchcoatnougat ; what’s the plot? We can discuss more in DM’s if you’d like! Besides, I’m free for the week, but if you need a beta reader I can offer a couple of people that I know. 

Sam sends her a message. 

babytrenchcoatnougat: can you give me some advice or writing tips if you have any? i'm not looking to make any implied romantic pairings in the fic

misha-moose-dean-burger-lover: well, that depends, what’s the fic going to be about? 

babytrenchcoatnougat: i don't know yet, maybe team free will 2.0 just taking a roadtrip to nowhere without a destination in sight after defeating chuck?

misha-moose-dean-burger-lover: eeeeee

misha-moose-dean-burger-lover: that sounds like a awesome idea misha-moose-dean-burger-lover: you're definitely going to want to have specific destinations in mind, and only a hint of angst, and what they’re going to do at these locations 

misha-moose-dean-burger-lover: use transition words and make sure it doesn’t repeat often, descriptive details but don’t use it in every scene, and make sure there are frequent movements in the characters so they don’t sound so stiff, and make sure to slowly transition into the next scene, as time skipping to every scene will make the story seem boring. misha-moose-dean-burger-lover: make sure the characters aren’t ooc either! 

And so, Sam writes. He writes until his eyes hurt and he definitely needs some sleep, so he sends a quick message to a beta to read it over for him and they do, gushing about how the plot was wonderful and badly needed after all the terrible angst that occurred this season. He smiles, giving his thanks before uploading the first chapter out of 15, 13k words, onto ao3. 

[He checks over the grammar and tags over fifteen times.]

He can hardly contain his excitement, jumping around happily all day, even baking Dean a pie which makes him get sprayed with holy water and go through every test just to make sure he isn’t some supernatural creature. 

Later that afternoon, he checks his ao3 underneath the same username and finds out it’s gotten about 150 hits, and 38 kudos, which makes his heart swell. He’s also gotten a comment, and he presses comments eagerly. 

‘Kill yourself, psycho virgin fag.’ 

He re-reads the comment a couple of times, eyes tearing up and dropping his phone onto the kitchen table recklessly. What the fuck. Was his story really that bad? Did those people who didn’t leave a kudo really hate his story that much? Did the fans think his story was too child-like? Badly written? OOC? Do they really hate him that bad that he actually should commit- 

Sam breaks down right then and there, pushing his computer aside, placing his head down and crying softly. Castiel and Dean don’t find him until an hour later, and he’s still softly crying. They rush over to him, Dean quickly sitting to the right while Castiel sits to the left. “Sammy? What happened?” Dean asks, and the younger Winchester shakes his head. 

“N’thing.” He mumbles, and the older Winchester sighs. He’s just being stubborn, when he doesn’t want other people to worry about him, afraid that he’ll give them his problems. “Sam, please, if you talk to us, then we may fix the problem together. Remember, we made that promise two years ago, to be more open with each other.” The former-angel now archangel says, pushing Sam’s hair out of his face. Sam takes a shaky breath, pushing himself off the desk and grabs the laptop, opening it up to the recent fanfiction he had written, and Castiel and Dean both skim through it before Dean snatches the laptop. “Is this a fanfiction?” He looks at him as if he’s crazy, and Sam slowly shakes his head in agreement. Castiel walks over to Dean, both of them reading the first chapter silently, and everytime he glances over to see their reactions it seems unchanged. His brother probably thinks he’s weird, and Castiel is going to find him crazy-

“Damn, Sammy, you’ve got talent.” Dean says, and he actually sounds impressed. “W- what?” 

“That is incredibly written and a wonderful idea, I think we should go on a roadtrip ourselves,” Dean nodded in agreement. “Is this why you’re crying? I think this is perfect.” 

“Wait - you two do find it weird or anything?” 

Castiel and Dean look confused. “Why would you think that Sammy? I like it.” 

“You should uh - read the comment.” He says, and it takes the angel and older hunter a moment to find the comment section at the bottom, Castiel pointing at the button. Their faces turn into pure fury. 

“I’m going to smite them.” Castiel all but growls out, and Dean shuts the laptop closed. “Don’t listen to ‘em, this is fucking amazing, got it? I want the second chapter. Don’t listen to what anyone else says, they're probably jealous that we’ve got a New York bestseller writer and all they can do is write the abc’s.” Dean hugs his brother, Castiel immediately joining right in and Sam sighs happily. They stay there for a bit, muttering out a ‘thank you’ before jumping up slightly, seeing that he’s gotten two more comments on his fanfiction, and nervously opens up the comment section to see that a user called ‘quicksilvermalec’ writing on how much they enjoyed the fic and can’t wait to read the second chapter while an anonymous user has attacked the one that insulted him, throwing a whole truckload of insults and Castiel smiles. “They got what they deserved.” The archangel says, and Dean shouts ‘damn straight’ joyfully. “Would the two of you want to write fanfiction with me, then?” Sam asks while writing the second chapter about an hour later, and the unison ‘yes’ gives him a warm feeling in his chest. 

[itsclydebitches]

Let me start by saying that I love all of your meta and analysis soooo much especially the ones about Ozpin. I was curious to hear what what do you think are some legit motally grey things/mistakes he did, not the garbage the haters love to throw around. The only things I can think of are either in an impossible situation with only shitty options (where I don't really consider the decisions as immoral since morality needs agency and the chance of a better choice) like with Pyrrha and Oscar (1/2)

Thank you, anon! And honestly? I couldn’t agree more. I often say that Ozpin has made mistakes partly so that people don’t blow off the points I’m trying to make with, “Oh an Ozpin stan. Ignore her, she thinks he can do no wrong and thus can’t provide an objective opinion.” But honestly? Not all mistakes are created equal. There are mistakes one makes because they’re selfish, foolish, didn’t bother to take precautions---things that are preventable and therefore invite heavy criticism and an acknowledgment of responsibility. However, there are also mistakes that, as you say, are simply outside of your control. You don’t have the information available to make an informed and therefore better choice, or you simply just have bad choices from the get-go. For me, the vast majority of Ozpin’s mistakes are the latter. 

Overall, I think the largest mistake he bears responsibility for is prioritizing his love for Salem over basic ethics. AKA, choosing to become a wannabe god with her and encouraging this mentality that they are intrinsically superior to everyone else in Remnant. Granted, there are many other factors involved in this, including Salem’s status as a creature now consumed by darkness (she was heading down this road no matter what Ozpin may have done differently) as well as her abuse towards Ozpin, her manipulation, and the sheer overwhelming terror of the goal Light set him. Which just reinforces that all Ozpin’s mistakes are understandable to one extent or another. He’s human and his mistakes resonate because, if people are honest with themselves, they’d probably admit, “Yeah. If I found the love of my life again I’d be tempted to ignore Light’s warning about her too. If I was offered a life of luxury and power under the guise of protecting the people, I might cave and go along with that as well...” We get how Ozpin got to that point, we may admit we couldn’t have done better, but we likewise understand that the man he became, regardless of how he got there---from natural human desires to abuse---isn’t okay. As Oz and his host ask themselves, “What are we doing?” And we see how he comes back from that edge. How he rejects that sort of power later when it’s offered to him after the Kingdoms were reunited. Ozpin learned from his mistakes. 

Which adds further complications to his choices in the present day. Just as Ozpin learned that the world doesn’t need him as an all-powerful figurehead, he likewise learned that sharing secrets leads to nothing but the worst kind of consequences. The first time he reveals what he’s hiding? His wife announces that she’s going to take over the world, then murders their children, then him. A more recent time he reveals information? A very close friend betrays him to said wife. Tries to kill him. Nearly kills his allies. Is eventually killed himself. The latest time he was forced to reveal information? People are shouting, grieving, he’s punched into a tree, the one friend still at his side completely rejects him. 

The fandom points to Ozpin’s lies and secret keeping among the group as his greatest mistakes and yes, objectively I agree. Without context I can say no, he shouldn’t have made a promise if he didn’t intend to keep it. He should have just told them that there were questions left, or that the relic attracted grimm. But the thing is that context is there and it always matters. I’ve spoken before about how I think Ozpin made that promise with precisely zero expectation that he’d ever be put into a situation where he might conceivably break it, that I’d also hesitate to tell a group that there were invaluable questions left when they were clearly eager to use them recklessly (which they then did), and that keeping the grimm aspect secret was the only logical course of action because telling them would just attract more. But even ignoring all of the potential justifications attached to each choice, I simply don’t believe we can ignore Ozpin’s trauma. I might not have lied to people like that, but I haven’t been horrifically traumatized for a thousand years whenever I do tell someone information. Ozpin has been conditioned not to tell people and though yes, everyone technically has free will, trauma like that will “force” you to take what you perceive as the only safe option. It fucks with your perception and your understanding of what even is an option in this situation. Ozpin simply no longer has the ability to go, “I’ll trust them!” like the others around him do and their reactions certainly didn’t help teach him otherwise. Imagine that for a thousand years you’re punched every time someone lifts their hand. Then someone you’ve just met demands that you stop flinching whenever they raise theirs. No matter how much you may want to stop, you can’t. Not immediately on someone else’s order. The human experience doesn’t work that way. 

(As a side note, the reason why I emphasize a thousand years so much is because I believe the extent of the trauma and its implied consistency is really relevant here. As is the close tie between that trauma and Ozpin’s choices. There are many other characters out there who I don’t believe “But they had a hard life!” excuses their actions: Snape, Bakugo, recently what I’ve read of Yennefer---among others. It’s notable to me that Ozpin didn’t endure traumatic events by revealing information and then, say, go abuse his students for years. Or tell someone to kill themselves. Or take over someone else’s mind. Not only is his trauma more extensive than the vast majority of characters we meet, but he hasn’t used that trauma as an excuse to get away with horrific---and unrelated---choices. The love of my life rejected me and then died... so I’m going to abuse eleven-year olds under my care. My mom is demanding and people cater to me too much... so I’m going to gleefully beat up my weakest classmate. I dealt with being ugly for a good chunk of my life and now can’t have kids... so I’m going to take away someone’s autonomy and endanger a whole town. Unlike most other characters with tragic backstories, Ozpin has a one-to-one correlation between that hard life and the mistakes he’s made: people hurt me when I tell them things... so I just won’t tell them things. By keeping that strong connection it eliminates the possibility that Ozpin is just using his trauma as an excuse (knowingly or otherwise) and he is, notably, still a good person beyond those very specific choices. We see his horror at the decisions he has to make. We see his endless attempts to be as kind towards others as possible. We see how much he’s fought not to allow his trauma to warp him into a person he’d despise. A person like Salem. Just like not all mistakes are created equal, for me not all people making mistakes are equal either. I’m less likely to forgive your mistakes if you’re an all around horrible person. You’re clearly a good person trying your best? Your mistakes are easier to stomach and, as discussed above, I’m more inclined to assume that these mistakes stem from things outside of your control. If someone who has been nothing but cruel to me lied I’d automatically be pissed. If someone who has been nothing but kind to me lied, I’m inclined to ask them why they did that, expecting that there’s a good reason attached to that decision.) 

So did Ozpin make mistakes? Technically yes, but I think they were mistakes largely outside of his control. Either he only had shit options available to him or he was in a position where the group demanded something of him that his mental health simply wouldn’t allow. People have to remember that we’re not Ozpin (insert obligatory, “He’s fictional” here). We have more options available to us when it comes to our choices, simply by means of not having gone through what he has. His choices are always limited, both by outside factors and his own experiences, and they likewise always have inevitable downsides. Ozpin doesn’t get the luxury of choosing anything that turns out well. 

As a final note, with Volume 7 underway I’d say that another potential mistake has been introduced: making Pyrrha the Fall Maiden. Meaning, unless the story reveals that Winter actually can’t become the next Winter Maiden due to her age (unlikely given that others have said the non-canonical age limit is 30), it raises the question of why he’d choose a 17 year old over a 20-some graduate. However, to me this is pretty clearly a writing issue. The creators were more concerned with keeping the story revolved around RWBYJNR than they were the implications of having Ozpin choose Pyrrha over a more suitable adult. So though yes, I’d technically consider that another mistake.... obviously not much Ozpin could do against his own creators lol. 

Which finally leads to me saying that although Rooster Teeth seems to want us to believe that Ozpin is a morally gray character, they haven’t succeeded in writing one well. That characterization requires a fair balance between what most would consider “good” and “bad” traits. Not a good person presented with only bad choices. Or a character so horrifically conditioned that his ability to make a better decision is almost impossible. We wouldn’t call a person who was manipulated or forced into doing bad things a morally gray character, nor would we use that term if, somehow, they were sick and that led to those choices. That’s how I view Ozpin, mentally as opposed to physically sick. After a thousand years he needs evidence that trusting people and giving them his secrets won’t result in him being hurt. Until he’s shown that, expecting him to trust people just because they insist they are trustworthy is like asking someone with a broken leg to run you a race. They can try, but good look expecting them to succeed. 

[jq37]

The Report Card -- Fantasy High Sophomore Year Ep 1

Sophomores and Spring Break 

Note: Hey guys! I decided to try something a little bit different and slightly more structured than my usual recaps for FH: Sophomore Year. I’m hoping this will be a little easier for me and a more useful tool for keeping up to date since there will be a lot more eps to keep track of and they’ll be easier to miss. Lemme know what you think and if you want raw, unfiltered opinions on anything specific, feel free to send me an ask. I’m always down to go off about literally whatever. 

We’re back, baby! It is Sophomore Year at Aguefort and the gang is on Spring Break. A lot is going down so lemme break it down. The Bad Kids, having defeated Kalvaxus last year, are all entitled to a share of his hoard and all the red tape is finally cleared so they all get 20k gold each (which is an insane amount of money converted to USD if you use the WOTC conversion rate of a gold coin being around $145 (circa 2006 when they answered the question)--which would be close to $330 with inflation). Jawbone and Sandra-Lynn are moving in after less than a year into a profoundly haunted house and it’s kind of a Full House situation because Adaine, Fig, Kristen, and Tracker all officially live there (plus it seems that Zayn has also anchored himself to Adaine’s tower--btw, Adaine took the tower that the haunted house obviously has) and you know all the other Bad Kids are gonna be there on the regular. 

More importantly, Aguefort gives the gang their big project for the year--finding the crown of the Nightmare King which was stolen at the end of last season--which is worth 60% of their grade (Adaine does a full Hermione at this information). Each of the gang has info about the NK but the trail has mostly gone cold. Luckily, Fabian just got a hot tip about where Falinel is keeping Aelwyn and she seems like a pretty good lead to start with since she was super tied up in the bad side of all the messiness of last year. Adaine is displeased to say the least. 

Going off to find the crown is super exciting story-wise for two reasons. First of all, it means the gang gets to hire, well, hirelings to help them and temporarily join the party! They ping basically every cool NPC they can think of (except for Tracker for some reason which is BONKERS because (1) she probably would have done it for free and cutting her in would still be keeping the money in the family, (2) she’s dope as hell, (3) she’s a cleric and the party can always use more healers, (4) she’s a werewolf so presumably she has skills that would help in the woods, and (5) they’re t r a c k i n g down a crown and the girl’s name is literally T R A C K E R, but I will not backseat D&D) and eventually end up with Ragh (who has been without an adventuring party all year, poor guy), Sandra-Lynn (swayed by a nat 20 rolled by Fig), Cathilda (!?) ,and, for some reason, Gilear (which Fabian is happy about, mainly for the opportunity to maybe bump him off on the way). Second of all, if you recall, Elmville is a pretty modern town but the rest of the continent is less fantasy high, more high fantasy. Horses and lanterns and all that pseudo-medieval goodness. They are gonna stick out like a sore thumb. I am very here for it. 

Everyone goes home to rest up but, after some ominous dreams, only four of them wake up. Riz and Fig are left asleep and then Brennan mic drops and ends the episode which is a power move and I am extremely upset about it but also, respect. Right for the jugular immediately. I heard Murph and Emily are on tour in the UK next week which probably has something to do with this but, in the moment, I did not know that and I really felt the hammer drop in my heart. It was wild. Cannot wait to see where we go from here. Plus, who doesn’t love watching characters freak out because their friends are in danger?

Random Thoughts

I have no idea what the title of this episode is or if it’ll even have one and not a number but I gave it a placeholder one for now. I also don’t have access to the stream yet so I didn’t get to include some info I wanted to (like a record of nat 20s, and nat 1s so I can track their stats for the school year) and I probably missed some stuff because my brain can only hold so much info guys. I’m not Brennan. 

I mentioned this yesterday during the stream, but there will never be anything better than the pure D&D joy of everyone, in character, talking over each other to clown on each other. They get the friend-group banter that’s a hair breadth’s away from bullying so true to life and it’s so fun to watch. On the flip side, the opening scene with everyone introducing themselves and affirmatively claiming each other as their best friends was also peak D&D. Found family= best trope. 

Fig and Adaine burn spell-slots at basically the same time to try and beat each other to the best room in the (Scooby-Doo ass) house--which is exactly the kind of thing that would happen in this world. It’s such an intuitive setting. I love it so much. (BTW, Fig ends up staying in the false space under the revolving grand piano because, of course).

Fabian and Gorgug went to recruit Ragh, who assumed they were propositioning him for a three-way. In his defense, they did do it in a super proposition-y way and they were in the middle of the LGBTQ student union.

Also, Gorgug gives Ragh an inspiring speech about thinking you’re your own dad which makes him burst into tears. 

Speaking of, Jawbone offhandedly says he’s poly but, like, based on some of the stuff he’s said, I feel like that’s not really a reveal. He also gets along well with Gorthalax and would be down w/ a three-way if Sandra-Lynn wanted to which, again, totally checks out. 

Arthur Aguefort uses Chronomancy to rewind time and catch a snide comment Adaine made under her breath, which is exactly the kind of frivolous use of God-like power I’d expect from him.  

I really love Adaine’s energy coming into this season. She’s in therapy. She’s in a good home environment. She’s comfortable enough with her friend group to do stuff like prank Fig (love that they’re gonna be living together now). And she’s good friends with Zayn now which I want to see more of based on their one interaction in this ep which was very cute. I am already on record as saying I would be down with her getting a ghost boyfriend--I mean, for the aesthetic alone--but I’d be happy with just more friendship. 

Fabian is also hilarious this season because you can tell he’s gone a bit soft from having friends and leaning into that (the friendship necklace with Riz) but also he’s fully aware that it’s happening so he’s, like, ping-ponging back and forth like, “These are my friends,” and, “What am I saying? I used to be cool,” and it’s very funny. Very happy the Aelwyn storyline is happening right out of the gate, both because I think Aelwyn is a very interesting character with a lot of potential for nuance but also because Fabian reacting to her and Adaine reacting to Fabian reacting to her is always gold. 

Prompted by an offhand conversation from Fig about rock and roll, Brennan--earning another feather for his Cap of God Tier DMing--goes on an impromptu five minute long improved diatribe about a bard who played such a good concert that it instantly impregnated everyone in attendance (dudes too) who gave birth to kids with sick rocker hair and denim jackets and ascended to Rock Heaven on their 18th Birthday. You truly have to watch it to believe it. At a certain point I thought he was gonna drop it but that was the moment he doubled down and kept going. Amazing. 

Watching Murph, in real time, make up a girl/boy/whateverfriend in Fantasy Canada was a gift. 

I don’t have access to the stream yet but best quote of the night that I can remember is Kristen choosing her room: This is triggering and I’ll take it. (Her line about her lesbian starter kit and the one about wanting a horse were also bangers). 

The group talks about what they’re going to do for transportation outside of Elmsville since they don’t really use cars out there and they somehow get from “disguise Fig’s tour bus” to “commission Aguefort to create a brand new animal that can hold six people plus hirelings, one of which is Fabian who is also riding his motorbike”.

I love that Sandra-Lynn’s Mom Powers work on Tracker. 

Basrar doesn’t accept the invitation to come with on the quest, but he does give Kristen a bag of infinite ice cream sandwiches, which is basically just as good, IMO. 

Oh Gilear. The man is sleeping in the Seacaster garage, being bullied by skater kids, and now he’s stuck on this quest with his ex and Fabian who actively wants him dead.  

Speaking of, I’m psyched to see more of Sandra-Lynn. She was kind of a sleeper badass at the end of last season. 

Ragh is keeping secrets which I hope the cast doesn’t forget because it could be nothing serious (like the high school drama happening with Skrank and the 7 maidens--maybe he’s just crushing on Gorgug who did full kiss him during Promocalypse) or it could be Serious Business that will blow up if the don’t stay on top of it. We’ll see. 

Oh, almost forgot. Adaine wants an emotional support frog. Every time I think I can’t love her more.   

Detention

Fig for Not Respecting Personal Boundaries

Fig goes full Emily right out the gate and, after finding out that Skrank (nerdy bird dude who apparently can get it) was not only dating Ostentasia (rich, popular dwarf) but also dumped her in pursuit of Danielle Barkstock (one of Ostentasia’s party members, the scandal), disguises herself as him with Danielle to figure out what’s going on. And, wouldn't you know it, when she gives herself away, Danielle immediately is shocked and appalled, as you would be, obviously. We also learn that she’s still catfishing Dr. Asha which is, how you say, for sure a crime. Fig, please, I’m begging you. Cease. 

Honor Roll

Fig, Riz, and Adaine for Researching the Nightmare King

Fig made both lists, look at that. Wasn’t my plan for this to be a three-way tie (also didn’t expect to use the word “three-way” this many times in this writeup) but I think their contributions were pretty much equally valuable. Rainsolo on the Discord wrote up this summary of the lore dump Brennan gave them.

[echo-inthevoid]

Season 2 q&a and overall reaction

Jonny stealing everyone's names XD 

Is martin going to be ok!? I also need to know! 

He said no;-; 

ok ya, no one's gonna be ok. 

Ya, he must do sooo much research. 

Ya, except for "fatigue" lol.

Eyyy the mechanisms!! 

What's the red string brigade? Ok, I guess a group of fans theorizing about stuff. 

Oh ok so someone else did martins poetry. Ooh, there's more martin poetry out there! *grabby hands*

Ok ya, Alex clarifying that Jon isn't stupid he just makes poor decisions. Probably if he'd paused and thought about it (like I did lol, I had to go do some stuff in the middle of that ep and thought about it a whole bunch lol) instead of immediately going out and buying an axe and further isolating himself and panicking immediately he probably would have figured it out. This is why it's bad to panic in a crisis guys. 

Eyyy! Jonny's parents voiced Gertrude and Leitner! That's so cool. 

XD Jonny grumbling about having to work with his parents. 

Hmm, I hadn't really thought of Gertrude being like a mother figure in the story? She just seems very cut-throat I guess from what Leitner said. Idk so far I've been very suspicious of her. Especially since that one statement where her photo burned a whole bunch of people or something. She just seems very shady... 

Alex chortling over Jonny's pain. XD

Side note, Every time there's a q&a I just can't stop noticing Jonny's voice going in and out of archivist range? Like most of the time I'm just listening along and then he'll say a sentence a bit grumblier and my brains immediately like "ARCHIVIST! That's THE ARCHIVIST!!" 

Martin would be the last one alive in Friday the 13th! It's official! 

(Is it bad that this gives me hope)

Jon likes Nonfiction, documentaries, and probably collects something just a little bit weird. *writes down for use in potential fics* 

also while im at it I remember jon saying he dislikes coffee at one point,  and so many people have him liking coffee in their fics! This has been your daily reminder of that fact because ever since then it keeps bugging me lol. (But also do whatever u want.)

Alex's spluttering sounds so much like Martin.

Yes!! I want to hear jon sing!! Yes! Musical Episode When!!?

Ah yes yes yes! All the characters are so unique!!? How does he do it!! 

Ya, it being in audio format sometimes makes it hard to understand what's happening in the live-action bits. (Live-action is the wrong word but u know what I mean.)

Oh ok ya, how he mentioned he got a pipe was quite clever I didn't realize that that's why he mentioned it at all. 

Ooh, there's a manga where there's something similar to Michael? I'll have to look that up later...

XD Alex and Jonny arguing about apples. 

Ok, so all the statements we're hearing ARE for reals. I kinda assumed but good to have it confirmed.

They used to hang out together!!? Work function curry nights!! ;-; 

Ya Ya! Who made the leitners!?

"You are assuming a book needs to be written" ...ok then. (but it has to have been created somehow??? Did they just spring fully formed from the powers? why? And why take the form of books?)

Alex's mischievous laugh about whether jon has friends *trembles in fear*

Yes!! Micheal is so good! I'm so happy they love him too! Yesyes! His laugh! 

Ah Yes!! Mary kaey was so creepy! 

XD yes yes yes fatigue was written on zero sleep, I knew it! 

Akskdjdkd I love them so much. Also, I've looked up Michaels voice actor luke booys and he does some other horrory type sketches n stuff and I kiiinda want to do a little animatic with some of those but it's Michael like annoying some poor soul lost in his halls... I think that'd be fun. I wonder if anyone's done that yet? If so someone send me the links I neeeed iiitt :3

Season 2 summary:

Uuuuu ya so this season was really good. I kinda listened to it in bursts of about ten episodes every couple weeks and then have been saving up the reactions to post later so these are usually going up about a week or so after I actually listened to the episode just FYI. 

I also do have a lot of spoilers cause I can't keep myself away from fanfic and people don't always tag for spoilers and I kiiinda wana know what's coming beforehand anyway? Idk it's hard man I get very stressed about what might happen and then also listening to too much at a time is too spooky for my poor little heart so I gotta read the less spooky fanfic to fulfill the hyperfixation you see. (If anyone has fanfic with spoilers only up to season 2 that'd be great btw) 

Anyway, I try not to take spoiler type stuff into account unless I'm just so sure of it I can't really not acknowledge that I know about it. 

Also, can I just talk about Michael for a minute?? Cause he's such a unique character? And I guess maybe there are other characters like him but I haven't ever seen one -tho to be fair tma is only like the third horror thing I've ever really got into (the other two are the SCP Foundation in its various forms and Little Nightmares. Hence why I keep making reference to SCP it's really the only thing I know similar to this.) But he's such a cool concept!!? Like someTHING that still has a personality? He's so not human? Like I get what he says but also I don't really? Idk im pretty sure he's an avatar right? Right?? Idk if that means he was a person at some point? But all this to say that he is probably the most inhuman character I've come across so far and I'm trying to figure out what it is about him that's so "other" to me? Like... I don't really know what Micheal's deal is? he seems to want to be sort of a neutral mischief-maker but also it seems like he keeps getting invested. But also I just love the way he talks about himself. Like he's a monster that has a personality and is fully intelligent but isn't just evil but isn't neutral either and certainly isn't benevolent. Like he's so complex and just,,,, the idea of a "thing" that's got a personality?? I love it? Kind of like dryads or spirits of things? Like the idea that after a long time things gain personality just by existing? Not that that's what Michael is necessarily? but that same sort of concept applies to him I think. Like the way he IS the maze and wants to help but wants to just watch but wants to kill them all. He's just so interestinggggggg. (And another vision of what jon could become?)

 also "es Mentiras" is a beautiful name 💕

So are him and not-Sasha avatars? Not-Sasha also seems completely inhuman and I was under the impression that avatars were (or used to be) human? Or are they like personifications of their power? Do all the powers have personifications of themselves. not-Sasha seems even less human than Michael? Like she seems to just really genuinely enjoy causing fear? Tho I guess we didn't really get to hear a lot of her. She just seemed kinda gleefully angry most of the time we heard from her. Was she... Human once!???

Anyway. Also, can I just talk about leitners line about jon belonging to the eye!!? Just..*chefs kiss* hnnnngg I need more jon grappling with that. I just need more everyone dealing with the fallout post all of the finallies ok? I still need more of jon angsting over his worms scars and stuff and now I also need jon freaking out about belonging to a fear god power thing. 

Also Martin! Is Martin ok? He sure did a lot of yelling which he doesn't usually? Look I love him and he actually thinks before he acts (unlike SOME people *looks at jon*) and he writes poetry and it is pretty good poetry ok!! And he cares about everyone and just wants a happy ending and aaaaa😭

Petition to get some statements from Martin's pov tho? I mean that's not gonna happen cause Jon's the archivist but I want more martin pov!! Maybe we can get some of his poem tapes??? Pls????? 

I feel so bad for Tim. It sounds like he's kinda fallen into despair.

Also Elias!!? Is showing his spooky side!!? He can control cameras and beat a man to death with a pipe!!? This is his "place of powerr"!!? I am afeared!!? At least jon knows he shouldn't trust him now. Oh jeez, I wonder if jon will listen back to the tape and know what happened. Thhhatsss rough. Oh dear, I hope he doesn't feel guilty cause Leitner did keep trying to hurry him and now everyone thinks it was him. Even martin thinks he did it? Wich like I kinda want to hear more of his thoughts on that? How much does he believe that jon did it? Tim certainly seems pretty certain but he's a bit biased and cynical right now so. 

And they were in the maze for DAYS? 

Now I need martin recovering from being stuck with Tim in Michaels maze for days being angry and worried and hungry etc... Dksjdksa knowing jon could be dying RIGHT NOW and there's nothing he can do. Please someone give me the fic links if this exists!! I've already written like 5 drabbles based entirely on spoilers/other fics (which I'll probably post (w/ links to their inspirations) once I'm caught up and can make sure I'm not just completely demolishing cannon lol. 

Leitner didn't even scream or yell or anything when he was murdered. Literally the chillest dude ever. F

Overall super great, Elias is terrifying, let's dive into the next season!!! I've got 2 seasons to finish in like, less than 2 or so weeks(?) if I wana be caught up by season 5 hhhh,,,

Better get started I guess. 

[rosaguard]

summer waxes poetically about her favorite aeris gainsborough ships:

i never reblogged that five ships meme because...well i don’t have five aeris ships i care about lol. however, i was challenged(tm) so here is something close to it. i do feel like it is fitting to make this post on here since aeris was actually the first muse i truly started writing a ship on after asking someone first ( and i had been writing on tumblr for like...5 years on and off before that for context. anything before that was just..maybe flirting - nothing i felt invested in ).

aeris & happiness.

   the most important ship. the OTP. no other can compare. i think the biggest tragedy of aeris’ death is that so much was taken from her. she had so much to live for, so much to do, and her life was brutally and suddenly ripped away when she was finally getting the chance to figure herself out and rise to her full potential. i don’t want to aeris to die in the remake ( especially because everything about the whispers would’ve felt like a waste of time if nothing significant changes and aeris living is probably as significant as you can get ) but if it happens, it happens - i’ll just be really sad and disappointed by it lol. i’ve always been very clear that aeris’ death is not a bad one despite my blog canon essentially retconning it. there’s a reason she dies and it’s not to further cloud’s man pain ( he had enough of his own trauma already ); she dies because she’s a legitimate threat to sephiroth’s plans. she’s actually an example of a character death, especially a female one, done incredibly well, especially compared to SE’s recent output ( serah, luna, etc. ). also anyone who says she was created just to die is also wrong. barret was originally written to die first and they decided to change it.

    anyway, the point of me bringing all of this up is that i didn’t decide to do away with her death because i think SE sucks and they hate women. i did away with it because a lot of aeris’ character development ( her learning about the cetra at cosmo canyon, figuring out what the white materia does, etc ) is implied / off-screen since we never know her point of view and then well...she dies. i wanted to explore what her feelings would be if she woke up alive after being attacked while meteor is slowly drawing closer to the planet. how would she handle that? how would she feel? would she feel like a failure? would she be angry? what would she do after meteor is destroyed? would she travel the world? join the w.r.o? tell everyone to fuck off and then move to a cottage in the middle of nowhere and live the rest of her life in peace? these are the questions i wanted answered when i thought about aeris living. i don’t care if she ends up with cloud, or zack, or whoever because they don’t matter: aeris matters. she’s her own person with goals, desires, wishes, and more. no one talks about what she would want and do if she had lived. all people care about is what ‘man’ she belongs to as if she’s a prize to be exchanged between them.

   the second reason is simple that she fucking deserves it. she deserves it after living in a lab for 7 years and watching her mother die just trying to get her out. she deserves after having to deal with being stalked by the same company responsible for a lot of her suffering. she deserves to finally be around friends that make her feel loved, accepted, and cared for. she deserves to not feel alone, or like an outcast, or a freak because of her powers. she deserves to be able to go to icicle inn too and see footage of her father for the first time. she deserves to be able to go back to kalm and see her mom again. she deserves to live happily just like everyone else gets to do. her life has been filled with so much tragedy and pain yet she never lets it define her. she blooms in the face of adversity. she keeps smiling even up until the end of her life. she deserves happiness as her end-game and if i don’t get it in canon, i’m going to create it here myself.

aeris & cloud.

    i disliked this ship for a long time. it actually wasn’t because of the ship itself but due to some of my experiences with the shippers. i won’t go into my fandom experiences but i ran an account dedicated to ti.fa for almost six years so i’ve seen how...unpretty both sides of the 'ship war’ can get and it turned me off. a lot. when i decided to write aeris, i immediately started a replay of the the original game with an ‘aeris-lens’ ( analyzing her character, her relationships, making sure i got her date, etc. ). it made me look at her relationship with cloud in a different light since i had never really paid attention to it as heavily before since i avoided the ship tbh. i ended up enjoying their dynamic a lot. they have a natural chemistry with each other but there’s also this unspoken distance between them which is fully intentional - she has her own walls up and he has his. 

    they have a very ‘tragic love’ since well...she dies before anything can fully go to the next level. their relationship in canon is a very ‘what if’ and as a result, i often see people who don’t like the ship claim that they wouldn’t work because aeris wouldn’t be able to ‘deal’ with cloud and would’ve left. to be blunt, this a bad take considering supporting one another is prevalent throughout their relationship: 

aeris: i learned a lot. the elders taught me many things. about the cetra... and the promised land... i'm...... alone... i'm all alone now... cloud: but i'm...... we're here for you, right? aeris: i know. i know, but... i am the only...... cetra. cloud: does that mean we can't help?

cloud: ...i gave the black materia to sephiroth...? wha... what did I do... tell me, aeris. aeris: cloud... be strong, ok? He writhes and clutches his head. cloud urrrrrrgh... what have I done!? aeris: cloud... you haven't done anything. it's not your fault.

cloud: yeah, I hear you. sorry for what happened. aeris: don't worry about it. cloud: ...i can't help it... aeris: oh... then, why don't you REALLY worry about it? and let me handle sephiroth. and cloud, you take care of yourself. so you don't have a breakdown, okay?

    the remake only reinforces everything i like about their relationship: their banter is great, aeris gently takes his hand during one of his ‘moments’ and supports him, she confides in him about talking to her flowers, and he never treats her differently ( which is a big deal when just two nights before, he told someone to ‘get help’ when they claimed they could hear the planet lol ). they have so much in common as well: they both have struggled with loneliness, being an outcast, and not having a lot of friends. i’ll always find it incredibly interesting how cloud is repeatedly not invited to be apart of group functions in the remake ( he wasn’t allowed to celebrate with avalanche and had to sit outside jessie’s house as the others ate pizza ) until he met aeris and she invited him to have dinner with her and her mom. despite the ‘bodyguard’ dynamic to their relationship, they always feel like equals to me.

aeris: today’s special!!! cloud: why? aeris: because i met you, you dumb binch!!!

aeris: *says cryptic stuff and tells him that they can’t fall in love* ( i’m saying they because apparently in japanese / other languages she says ‘we can’t fall in love’, not just ‘you can’t fall in love with me’. ) cloud: uh....how about i do anyway??? also i’m saving you so...see you tomorrow at 11. bye.

me: their relationship never gets to a serious level because the opportunity was taken away from them de to unfortunate circumstances. 

also me: they’re just just...dumb and in love!!!! i’m sorry, that’s just the way it is!!!! she literally tells him that meeting him again was special to her and the silly boi doesn’t get it!!!! one of the composers of the game even said a tracks that plays with them is meant to have a romantic vibe!! when she pulls away from him, he reaches out for her because he doesn’t want her to let go!! the lyrics of hollow is literally ‘this time i’ll never LET YOU GO’ AAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!

    anyway, i’ve also noticed this weird trend in the fandom where it feels like cloud is never allowed to just has his own dedicated feelings about aeris - and i’m not even talking about romantic feelings. i feel like whenever there is talk about cloud’s relationship with za.ck or ti.fa, no one inserts aeris into it. they’re allowed to have their individual relationships with him yet with aeris it feels like you cannot talk about how much she meant to him and vice versa without other characters being thrown in. i don’t know if it’s because of shipping and people don’t want to acknowledge that like...characters can have feelings for multiple people or what but the reality is that cloud did feel something for her. she did mean a lot to him; so much so that he slept in her church two years after she was dead and went to her burial place alone. he missed her.  maybe it was just as a friend, maybe it was because of something more but i really dislike how their relationship and importance to each other, regardless of whether it’s platonic or romantic, is constantly invalidated.

aeris & gene.

     when kas / @castershot first created channels for gene and aeris in our rp server last year, i honestly did not think these two would have a serious relationship at all. i figured maybe they would have a fling or something at best / aeris would be the equivalent of a filler character in a few episodes of the show and then they would go their separate ways. ...that didn’t happen but i’m glad it didn’t! i didn’t know a gosh diddly darn thing about outlaw star but i’m very good at researching and aggressively reading wikis so i was able to whip up a verse ( and someone who watched the show thought i had actually watched it after reading my verse so i guess i did a darn good job! ). anyway, i feel like when writing aeris it’s very easy to...hmm...fall into very certain dynamics and considering gene’s line of work ( doing odd jobs, being a bodyguard for hire, a general jack of all trades ), i didn’t want it to be the ‘he’s a bodyguard, she gets protected, blah blah blah’ dynamic but in space. so their relationship ( at least in my head - there’s a lot going on in there tbh!!! ) basically became somewhat of a deconstruction of cl.erith + ( bad ) stereotypes about aeris in general:

      what if the helpless flower girl that needs saving from the big bad corporation is actually a liar who works for said corporation and was sent by them to retrieve something important(tm) and eliminate anyone that gets in her way? what if aeris, a secret member of the turks, has become so desensitized when interacting with other people since she is constantly wearing a mask and she can’t tell if she’s genuinely falling for someone or if her acting is just so good that even she can’t tell what’s real or fake anymore? what if i took all those bad takes about aeris knowing she would die, flip it, and actually make it so that she does know and still goes alone anyway because she wants to save lives for once instead of being the person who takes them away!!

me: imagine the drama!!! the angst!!! kas, casually: [redacted name b/c of spoilers] would just bring her back to life. me: WHAT?! >:(

apparently one character in the show is casually just GOD and can revive people so they can come back like:

    my bubble was BURST. dreams DASHED. plans CRUSHED. dramatics aside, i still kept the idea of her dying because i do like the take of a more secretly jaded / not as ‘pure’ aeris that works for shinra and has to basically relearn how to trust / care about others again + i live to attack kas and all of her muses. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯.  anyway, the point is that i love them and they’re a dynamic i’m very invested in the more times passes. they’re both so stupid and passionate and loud ( the first in character thing i wrote when i remade this blog was them screaming at each other in an argument ) but they’re also sensitive, don’t open up to others easily, and have trauma!! oof x 100.

me: this ship won’t be serious lol the ship, months later: may or may not have a thread with them going on a date. may or may not have gone to ti.fa and cloud’s wedding together ( where kissafist’s tif.a may or may not threaten to smash his balls in if he doesn’t treat aeris right. *smash em, rip em plays in the distance as aeris aggressively laughs nervously* ), they may or may not get married and have twins that may or may not be named ren and rose. me: clown putting on make up.png

so yea, they’ve come a long way(tm).

the end.

[dear-selena]

Caught Web Handed

Peter Parker x Reader

Summary: You like to write Spider-Man fanfiction, but none of your friends know. That is until MJ catches you writing one during a study session at Peter’s place. 

A/N: Hey guys! So I had this stupid funny idea the other day, and I just had to write it. I’m basically calling myself out in this as a fanfiction writer myself XD. I hope you enjoy this piece of fluff, and I hope to get more stories going in the near future! 

Words: 1893

---------------

A loud cry suddenly stopped Trevor in his tracks. Turning around, he saw a large, green winged monster take off, (Y/N) dangling from its feet. She continued to scream, pleading for someone, anyone, to help them. The students outside the school panic. Some started to run while others froze in horror. 

Trevor Trenton on the other hand took a different action. 

Running as fast as he could into school, he found an empty janitors closet, and slipped in without anyone noticing. In a matter of minutes, Trevor’s school uniform was replaced with a familiar red and blue suit that the people of Queens have become rather familiar with. Looking into the dirty mirror above the janitor’s desk, Miles took a deep breath. “Here we go again…” 

He put the mask on his head, and looked at himself. Once again, he took on the role of the one and only Spide-. 

“Hey, is anyone doing the physics homework?” Ned asks, interrupting you mid-sentence. Looking up, you see your friends Ned, Peter, and MJ in the zone, working on homework. You should be doing the same actually, but you had more pressing matters to attend to. 

Ever since you discovered fanfiction, you couldn’t get enough of it. It started when you were scrolling through your Tumblr, looking at the Spider-Man tag like you always do. While gushing at the heroic pictures and fanart of your favorite web-slinging hero, you came across a story. You read the summary to find that the story was about how Spider-Man might have gotten his powers. Curious, you read the entire story, and suddenly found yourself falling into a rabbit-hole of Spider-Man stories. 

All the fanfiction you found on Spider-Man were completely made up. Writers created different characters for who they believe was behind the mask and what their lives were like as a civilian and a hero. You especially liked the stories where writers gave the hero a love interest. People liked to make Spider-Man so flirtatious and charming, it was kind of ridiculous. Yet you couldn’t help but start to imagine your own Spider-Man stories, where you, low and behold, would be the love interest that the hero falls in love with. 

So you started writing your own fanfiction. You created a character named Trevor Trenton, a 17-year-old high schooler who was a part-time lifeguard at a local YMCA. When he wasn’t dealing with school or work, he was fighting crime as Spider-Man. You always imagined Spider-Man as someone your age, making the character more relatable for you. After all, if he was your age, the geeky crush you had on the hero would be a little less weird. 

Trevor Trenton was basically your dream man, and when you started sharing your stories on Tumblr, people seemed to really like him! They loved the origin story you gave him where he was a science experiment that got contaminated with Spider venom. They loved the crazy adventures you put him through, and the wild villains you made him encounter. They especially loved (Y/N), a character you named after yourself that was Trevor’s life-long friend and potential lover. 

No one on the internet needed to know you basically wrote yourself into the stories. 

“I’m doing physics right now, whats up?” Peter asks from his couch, acknowledging Ned’s question. 

“I’m stuck on problem 7… think you can help me?” 

Peter moved from his sprawled out position on his couch to help his best friend. Looking up again, you notice that MJ got up to get a drink in Peter’s kitchen. After looking back and forth from your friends to your laptop screen, you turn back to the document you had up. 

None of your friends knew you wrote Spider-Man fanfiction, and you intend to keep it that way. Yes, they knew of the weird crush you had on the hero, as you would bring it up once in a while, but that’s it. If your friends found out what you did in your free time, you don’t know how they’d feel about you… especially Peter. 

You knew Peter’s worked for Stark for quite awhile, and assumed he was quite familiar with Spider-Man and who he truly was. Every time you talked about Spider-Man and your crush on the hero, Peter would get very flustered, trying to say something positive about the hero, and even getting cocky about how awesome he was. It was kind of cute. You never wanted to ask him who was under the mask though, as to not seem nosy. But you secretly wish you could get some information from your good friend. 

You know, just for story inspiration… 

While Peter and Ned worked on physics, you continued to write about Trevor, and how he rescued you from the monster. After web-slinging away from the scene of the crime, Trevor put you down and took his mask off, revealing his true identity to you. With wide eyes, your character gasped at the sight of their high school crush in front of them. You started to write about how Trevor started to slowly lean in for a- 

“Oh my god, are you writing Spider-Man fanfiction?” 

Practically jumping from your seat and switching tabs on your laptop, you turn from your spot on the couch to see MJ staring at you wide-eyed, a glimmer in her eye. MJ practically shouted her question, definitely alarming everyone in Peter’s apartment. “W-what? No I-I was writing an essay that’s all…” You desperately try covering your tracks, palms sweating. You look over at the two boys to see Ned’s mouth wide open and Peter turning an intense shade of red.  

MJ’s eyes narrow as she leans towards you and takes control of your laptop. You try to fight her, but she’s already pulled up your story and starts to read aloud. “(Y/N) couldn’t believe Trevor was standing in front of her with his mask off. He was a lot more ripped than she thought he was, and was completely mesmerized by his abs that practically popped out of his spider suit and the slight bulge that showed off his-“ 

You immediately slam your laptop shut. “WELL THAT'S ENOUGH!” You shout, feeling the world spinning around you. The embarrassment you felt was dreadful, but eventually, you calm down enough to notice both MJ and Ned laughing hysterically. 

“Hey! It’s not funny!” You pout, hugging yourself tightly to hold in any dignity you had left. 

“No, it’s not that,” Ned says wiping a tear from his eye. “I just had no idea people wrote fanfiction about Spider-Man.” 

“I did,” MJ cuts in, still controlling her laughter. “I just didn’t think you’d be someone to write them (Y/N). Especially a self insert! Those are so cringy-.” 

“MJ stop!” You practically beg. You knew MJ would judge you if she found out, so the reality of it was overwhelming. 

Ned notices how uncomfortable you feel, and decides to step in. “Hey, it’s nothing to be ashamed of. MJ’s just insensitive sometimes.” He sends a cocky glance to her, one eyebrow raised. 

MJ just rolls her eyes. “I just speak the truth.” She walks back to her spot on the floor and proceeds to finish her homework. 

“Well, as I was saying,” Ned proceeds. “Fanfiction isn’t something you should feel ashamed about. I’ll admit I like to read Star Wars fanfics once in a while.” Ned sends you an assuring smile, relieving you of any tension you feel. “What about you Peter?” Ned asks, smacking the boy in the arm with a smirk. 

Peter’s face is still red, and he looks like he’s lost in thought. Ned smacking him on the arm definitely startles him. “Wha-? Oh! Y-yeah, I don’t really know much about fanfiction in general, b-but I think it’s cool.” Peter sent you a shy smile, rubbing the back of his neck. Butterflies erupt in your stomach, and you could definitely tell you started blushing. 

“So, how does writing Spider-Man fanfiction work?” Ned asks, his eyebrows raised. “Like do you know his identity or-.” 

“Oh no, nothing like that!” You quickly say waving your hands. “I don’t know who he is at all. People just like to, ya know, make up stories of his civilian life.” 

“Wait, really?” Peter says, suddenly becoming intrigued. “What do people think he’s like.” 

You proceed to tell Peter and Ned about some of your favorite Spider-Man fanfictions and even some of the stories you’ve created. When telling them about your original character Trevor, the two boys asked you a ton of questions about his origins. If they were weirded out by your hobby, they didn’t show it at all. In fact, they seemed to really like Trevor and the craziness you made up for his life. They however did tease you when you talked about how you self inserted yourself into the stories, and MJ even snorted, indicating she was paying attention the whole time. Nevertheless, they didn’t make you feel any shame, and you started to wonder why you kept this such a hidden secret from them. 

Everyone eventually starts working on homework again, and you switch gears to do the same. At one point, Ned and MJ left for home, leaving you and Peter alone. You pack your bag up to go home yourself, chatting with Peter about the upcoming classwork you weren’t looking forward to doing. 

As you were getting ready to walk out his door, Peter stops you. “You know, I liked heading about your Spider-Man character.” He says with a cheeky grin. 

Once again, you blush. “Oh, y-you did?” 

“Yeah, I kind of want to read it.” 

You turn away from him. “No! I’m not actually a good writer! I just do it for fun…” 

“I doubt you’re a bad writer. And if anything, I can just go make a Tumblr account and find them myself.” Peter retorts, a mischievous grin on his face. 

“I swear to God Peter.” You say, now laughing at how completely ridiculous this conversation is. You open his front door and are about to leave when something else occurs to you. “Hey Peter?” 

“Hm?” Peter hums, looking up at you curiously. 

“So, I know you work for Tony Stark and you probably know who Spider-Man is and all… c-can you please not tell him about how there’s fanfiction about him? I don’t know if that’d weird him out or not.” 

Peter blinks rapidly, and starts laughing to himself. “Don’t worry. I won't tell him.” 

You smile. “Oh! And please don’t tell him about me and this stupid crush I have on him!” 

Peter couldn’t help but laugh more. “I promise (Y/N), I will not tell Spider-Man who you are.” 

You nod awkwardly. “Okay?” 

After hugging Peter, you left his apartment and start the short trek to your place. You couldn’t help but think that Peter’s behavior before you left was rather strange. However, while Peter laughed at you, you knew he didn’t mean any harm. Peter likes to tease you when it comes to your crush on Spider-Man, and now he has something else to tease you about. Nevertheless, Peter is one of the sweetest people you know, and you were so grateful that he didn’t think so poorly of you. 

But you’ll be damned if he actually makes a Tumblr account to find your stories.

------------ 

-Peter Parker Tag List-

@sweetcoffeeblandtea // @house-arya // @jovialpeanut

-Permanent Tag List-  

@mindset-jupiter // @romance-geek // @imcharishope // @fakindob // @cutiekoa // @wowursofunny

[nexttrickanvils]

P5 Fic: Stolen Away

Because this idea has been bouncing in my head for a while.

Characters: Haru Okumura, Akira Kurusu, (brief appearance by Haru’s asshole fiancé and mentions of her dad)

Ship: Akira x Haru

Notes: AU where Akira is a real thief

Some skeevy dialogue from nameless background characters

---------

As a child, Haru wasn’t fond of her father’s parties, she found them boring and it meant less time for father to be with her. Father always assured her that her dislike was merely due to her childishness and that as she grew older, she would develop an appreciation and see the appeal.

Years later and no she still did not see the appeal.

How could anyone see the appeal of watching various important men giving each other false smiles and compliments to curry favor with each other?

Not only that but Haru would often overhear their conversations, bragging about their cruelties and acts of pettiness. She would never say it in front of her father but it made her skin crawl.

This party in particular has been a difficult one for Haru due to it being a (at least according to father) a celebration of her recent engagement to a politician's son, Takamasa Sugimura. But honestly it felt less like a celebration for her and more like one for her father and Sugimura-san.

All throughout the night, she felt like a porcelain doll being showed off. None of the guests even really talked to her but rather about her.

“Ha, ha congratulations Sugimura-san.”

“Isn’t she a cute little thing? She’ll make a fine little housewife for you!”

“Oh ho ho! Just out of high school huh? I always say it’s best to catch them young!”

The comments kept coming and Haru felt more and more uncomfortable and more and more trapped. She… she needed… she needed to...

SHE NEEDED TO GET OUT OF HERE!

To everyone’s shock, she pushes away Sugimura and rushes to one of the balconies outside. She then immediately slams the doors shut.

Haru takes several deep breaths and looks around. There was no one out here but her. She sighs with relief as she walks towards the railing and leans against it.

She knows that eventually she has to go back inside and apologize to her father and Sugimura for her behavior. Specifically for creating a scene and potentially embarrassing them both. She might not even go back on her own, she half expects a furious Sugimura to burst through the door and drag her back.

But for now, Haru enjoys the quiet and coolness of the night.

She stays this way for an unknown amount of time before she hears the sound of footsteps on the balcony. She sighs and turns around, ready with an apology on her lips.

“I’m truly sorry for my behavior earlier, I don’t know what came over...”

Standing before her isn’t Sugimura but rather a young man she has never seen before, with dark messy hair and grey eyes behind a white and black mask.

‘But the party isn’t a masquerade… why is he…?’ she thinks to herself

“Are you alright, Okumura-san?”

“W-who...?”

The young man smirks and presses his finger against his lips in a shushing motion. He walks towards the balcony doors and places what looks like a cane in the door handles, preventing the doors from opening.

Haru panics briefly, afraid that she was trapped with another monster. But the young man raises his hands and his expression becomes more sincere.

“Don’t worry, I’m not here to hurt you, I simply don’t want anyone to interrupt us, especially that asshole of a fiancé of yours. I saw you out on this balcony and felt that I just had to help.”

“But who are you?”

“Let’s say I’m a gentleman with a love for treasure and a weakness for damsels in distress. Now let me ask you again, are you alright Okumura-san?”

It’s a simple question and yet Haru finds herself unable to stop crying. He closes the gap between them and wipes away the tears running down her face.

“It’s alright, let it all out. It’s been a rough night for you hasn’t it?”

Haru looks up at him with an apologetic look, “I-I’m sorry. Y-you must think I’m so childish, a-acting like this...”

He shakes his head and she can see the kindness and sympathy in his eyes.

“Not at all. Go ahead and tell me what’s wrong. It isn’t healthy to keep all of that inside.”

Haru nods and rests her head against her mystery gentleman’s chest.

“I… Father says this party is for me but… as it went on, it became obvious that tonight is about him. Celebrating the connections he’s gained and how much closer he is to his plans to enter politics.”

“I see… and your fiancé?”

She thinks of the same polite line that she’s been told over and over to give about Sugimura whenever someone asks about her thoughts on the engagement. About how he’s an intelligent man with a bright future and she grows angry and let’s her true feelings spill out.

“I CAN’T STAND THAT CREEP! He treats me like a plaything for him to show off in public and to throw around in private! And his friends aren’t much better! Making terrible comments about how I’ll make a “fine little housewife” or how lucky he is to “catch” me just after high school!”

After all that Haru stops to catch her breath and looks up at the gentleman. For a brief moment, she can see a righteous fury burning in his eyes but it’s quickly replaced with a warm fondness.

“You’ve been holding all that in for a while, haven't you? Well... don’t worry Okumura-san, I’ll give these pompous assholes something else to talk about very soon.”

Haru stares at him, wondering what he means by those words until she finally recalls something from the morning.

A black and red calling card sent to her father, promising that tonight his most valuable treasure will be stolen.

“Y-you’re Joker aren’t you?”

The young man looks surprised for a moment and then chuckles.

“Well, well, aren’t you clever? Shame our little moment here had to end but now you should be running back inside to tell your father that I’m here.”

She should do that shouldn’t she? Warn her father that the Great Gentleman Thief Joker had arrived.

But that isn’t what she does… instead she steps away from Joker and raises her arms.

“Then… then HERE I AM! STEAL ME AWAY! I AM MY FATHER’S MOST VALUABLE TREASURE!”

She can feel the tears flowing again and she can tell that Joker knows that she’s lying. Maybe once a long time ago, she could say her father treasured her but…

Joker stares at her and Haru starts to feel foolish. She lowers her arms and walks towards the balcony door.

“...I promise I won’t tell my father, you’re here. Thank you for listening to me.”

However just as she pulls the cane out of the door handles, Joker speaks up.

“Wait… you realize it will be a difficult life...”

“Huh?”

“Tagging along with a master thief? Being on the run? You’d have to say good-bye to a lot of comforts, Okumura-san.”

“...Please... call me Haru... and I would give up everything if it meant I could be happier.”

Joker smirked as he took one of Haru’s gloved hands while the other pulled out a device with a hook on the end. He fires the device and the hook catches on one of the higher balconies. With that, he climbs to the top of the railing, pulls Haru up to join him, and moves his hand to wrap around her waist.

“Don’t worry, I’ve used this thing plenty of times. Now hold on tight, cause on the count of three we jump.”

Haru wraps her arms around Joker as he counts down. Then he reaches one and the two jump off the railing but before long they’re swinging down. Once they were low enough, Joker lets go of his grappling hook and the two tumble to the ground, with Joker cushioning the fall for Haru.

“My goodness that was… that was…!”

Joker chuckles as they stand back up.

“There’ll be more of that in the future. But right now I need you to hide, I still have your father’s treasure to steal and all that shouting is likely going to attract somebody.”

He plants a gentle kiss on Haru’s hand as he assures her that he’ll be right back.

Joker grabs the hanging grappling hook, presses a button, and is immediately pulled up to the higher balcony.

Haru watches in admiration until she hears the sound of doors swinging open. She quickly finds a spot to hide as she hears Sugimura’s voice on the balcony.

“Are you ready to apologi… Haru? HARU!? WHERE ARE YOU UNGRATEFUL LITTLE...”

That is not the tone of a man worried about his fiancé, that is the tone of a spoiled child angry that he lost his plaything.

Before, that tone scared Haru and made her feel weak.

But now as she turns her attention to Joker smoothly sneaking into her father’s office, she feels that she has nothing to fear.