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#they've all been pretty inseparable ever since
corrodedcorpses · 1 year
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Boys on Film
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Pairing: PS!Steve x PS!Eddie x Virgin!reader
Summary: Eddie and Steve have been your best friends for years. Although they've never done or said anything to make you feel bad, you can't help but feel inadequate to them when it comes to sexual experience. After they star in their first Threesome together, some weird emotions arise.
Warnings: Smut (18+), light angst, Masturbation (female), Voyeurism, Oral sex (m & F), Double penetration, watching porn (?)
Word count: 5.7k
a/n: I know I said I was going to post part 2 of this on my Ao3 but I think this account has finally revived itself! So part 2 will be up on here and Ao3 in a couple of days!
Also thank you to everyone for sticking around while my account was doomed, ily 🖤
Part 2 // Part 3
Eddie and Steve have been your closest friends for years.
Your friendship with Eddie started out your first week of highschool and the first week of Eddie’s third year. Eddie had seen you wandering the crowded halls, head down and gripping the strap of your worn backpack, trying to draw as little attention to yourself as possible. 
There was something about you, your shyness and innocence that Eddie seemed drawn to. He had thought about approaching you but couldn’t work up the courage or a good enough excuse to talk to you. 
Everytime your eyes met for a brief second you quickly looked away and Eddie saw, what he assumed, was fear in your eyes everytime you did. He was honestly surprised how fast his reputation spread, even to the newer students, but he was used to it by now. 
Luckily for him, as you sped through the halls at the end of school one day, head down low and staring at the floor, you had unknowingly stepped right into his path… and smashed right into his chest. 
You looked up at him with wide, shocked eyes and he offered you a kind smile back. He expected you to just run away, no one else bothered to apologise when they ran into him, but instead you stammered out a tiny “S-sorry, I didn’t see you, there’s just um, so many people”. 
Eddie was shocked for a second, his cold heart melting slightly at your tiny voice, but quickly regained his confidence and reassured you that “It’s totally fine, gets pretty crazy here at the end of the day”. 
“Yeah,” you’d replied with a sigh, “It’s gonna take some getting used to that’s for sure. People don’t just create a path for me when I’m coming.” you’d said with the slightest, still nervous chuckle, attempting to lightheartedly tease him. 
Eddie’s chest ached at the sound. “Well stick with me little one,” Eddie assured, throwing an arm around your shoulders and changing his original direction to walk with you, “I’ll protect you.” 
You rolled your eyes at his dramatics but couldn’t help looking up at him with awe in your eyes, blushing when he winked and smirked at you. “Now, where are we headed?” 
After that it seemed Eddie had decided that you were (somehow) worthy of his friendship and affection. You still don’t know why he had decided to be so nice to you that day but you were more than thankful. You’d both been inseparable ever since and although it had never progressed to anything more than friendship, you loved him dearly. 
4 years later at the end of your (Eddie’s third) senior year, he introduced you to the “now super metal” Steve Harrington.
At first you were apprehensive of Steve after hearing the rumours of “King Steve” and being no stranger to insults being thrown your way from Tommy H, Carol and the rest of the basketball team, even after Steve had graduated. 
Just like Eddie. 
Which is why you were so confused when he insisted on you giving Steve a chance and that he was sure you’d actually like him. You’d also heard the kids from Hellfire (especially Dustin) also gush over Steve, so eventually, with a lot of convincing, you decided that maybe he deserved a chance. 
Your first time meeting Steve properly was over at Eddie’s trailer, he’d insisted that the best way to break the ice was to all get high together, a habit you’d picked up thanks to the metalhead himself. You weren’t surprised that Steve also smoked, having heard about his infamous parties. 
Eddie had given you a ride home from school that day and you thankfully had a few hours with just him before Steve arrived after work. You were hoping that hanging out with Eddie would calm your nerves at spending time with Steve but unfortunately you spent the whole time practically pacing around the whole trailer, while Eddie watched you from the couch. 
Eddie found it amusing (and a little bit cute) how nervous you were but did his best to try and reassure you. 
“Don’t you remember that awful rumour that Carol spread around school about me?”
“You’ll have to be more specific sweetheart, which one?” He teased with a chuckle. Not helping. 
You glared back at him. “My point exactly. And Steve just stood there as they all laughed at me, at us practically the whole way through highschool!” You were almost yelling now. 
“Yeah but Steve didn’t do any of the actual bullying,” Eddie tried. 
You gave him a look of come on and he just shrugged in return. 
Luckily, before you could completely spiral, you both heard a knock on the door. You froze in your current pacing spot and looked at Eddie with fear in your eyes, realising you were closest to the door. 
You quickly ran and sat down on the other side of the couch before Eddie could even think about suggesting you get the door. Eddie looked at you confused while standing up, mumbling a don't worry, i'll get it with a fond shake of his head. 
He’d never admit it to you but he loves how shy you are, more specifically loves how shy you are around everyone but him and how you seem to always look at him to protect you when your nerves get the better of you. He liked feeling needed and trusted so much by you. 
Eddie had quickly opened the door, surprising you by pulling Steve into a quick friendly embrace. While Steve, even more to your surprise, gladly returned the hug. Eddie then stepped to the side to let Steve come in. Steve went straight to the kitchen, placing the two white bags on the counter and saying something about bringing reinforcements. 
It was only then that Steve seemed to notice you on the couch as you sat awkwardly fiddling with the hem of your skirt. 
“Where are my manners?” He asked rhetorically, striding over to the couch with his hand outstretched. You stood, timidly taking his hand to shake. 
“Hey I’m Steve, Steve Harrington”
“Hey, y-yeah, I know” we went to the same school dumbass, “I’m y’n”.
“Right,” he says, placing his other hand on top of yours, “Eddie didn’t tell me his “best friend” that I’d be meeting was so pretty.” 
You blushed hard at that. Hating his cheesy one liner and hating how much you wanted to like it. You shot Eddie a glance that said a mix between seriously? This guy? And please save me. 
Eddie gave you a look back that said play nice but asked Steve to help him grab some stuff from his room. You sunk back into the couch relieved as they walked away, how were you supposed to survive a whole night of Steve Harrington?
As Eddie and Steve got to the room you heard Eddie whisper “Seriously Man?” way too loudly.
“What?” Steve had whispered way too loudly back. 
“You’re coming on way too strong.”
“What? No I’m not, she's a total babe!” you rolled your eyes at that, there's no way Steve had changed as much as Eddie thought. 
“Yeah yeah, I know,” Eddie replied, “just chill out with the flirting, you’re gonna scare her off”.
I know? Eddie knows that you’re a babe? 
You did not have time to fully process what he meant when both boys returned from Eddie’s room with his trusty black lunchbox. 
You were relieved when Eddie sat next to you on the couch and Steve took the recliner. It was awkward at first, you were easily getting lost in the conversations with both of their big personalities but they made sure to ask you specific things and let you have enough room to talk. 
After you had all passed a few joints around it got even easier. You were surprised to find that Steve obviously cared a lot about Eddie, even remembering small details of the latest D&D campaign Eddie had been working on and making sure his favourite snack was in his plastic “reinforcement” bags.  
You also, despite yourself, started having fun and actually laughing with Steve Harrington for once and not at the expense of others as you’d seen him do too often in highschool. 
You were also surprised to see that maybe he wasn’t as confident and sure of himself as he used to be. He was still certainly confident but not in the same intimidating and arrogant way. 
Also, much to your detest, you started to find his lame flirting actually quite endearing. Eventually, you had no choice but to agree with Eddie that Steve Harrington was a really good dude now. 
Ever since, the three of you have been inseparable. 
They were your shoulders to cry on, someone to pick you up after a bad day, someone to tell all your secrets and dreams to. All three of you supported each other through every failed and successful endeavour. 
Especially Eddie who, after finally graduating, realised he really didn’t know what he wanted to do with his life. He started out at a shitty music store straight out of highschool but he soon grew tired of it, never one to settle for the mundane. He wanted something more. 
Although his ultimate goal is still to be a “rockstar” and the band is doing pretty well, Eddie soon realised that there was something else (other than guitar and Dungeon Master-ing) that he was extremely good at: sex. 
You’re still not sure how he got into it, if he’d decided himself one day or if he’d been approached by someone but somehow Eddie Munson finds himself as a semi successful pornstar.
When Eddie had first told you and Steve that he’d stared in a porno, neither of you believed him. You really thought he was playing some weird joke on you both as it wasn’t unlike him to. So, in order to prove to you both that he was in fact, telling the truth, he got a copy of the film. 
You were completely shocked when the tape started playing on Steve’s TV. The obscene images and sounds like a slap to the face, something you never thought you’d get to see or hear from your best friend. But, you had to admit, Eddie was good and he looked hot. 
You tried to ignore the growing ache between your legs as you and Steve had grilled Eddie all about it for the rest of the night, asking if it was good or awkward, how much money he made, did he think he would do more? How did he even get in this situation in the first place? 
He answered all your questions about how it was a little awkward at first but ultimately good and a lot of fun. He didn’t give specifics of how much he made but assured that it was definitely more than he made at the music store. He also was adamant that he definitely wanted to do it again. 
He wouldn’t go into specifics, and still won’t, about how he started up, always saying something along the lines of “being chosen by the sex gods” or “it just seemed a shame to not share my talents with the world”. Each time he was rewarded by a massive eye roll from you and Steve but neither if you decided to pry more than that. 
You were especially surprised by the interest Steve seemed to have in it, asking more about the technicalities of how it all worked. Steve, like Eddie, really didn’t have much of a plan after High School. You knew that although he enjoyed his current job, he didn’t want to work there forever. So it didn’t come as a total shock when Steve had asked Eddie a couple of months later if he could help Steve land a role in one of the films. 
That was about a year ago now. 
Although you loved your two friends dearly and although they have never done or said anything to make you feel inferior to them, you couldn’t help when those ugly feelings rose in your chest. It wasn’t easy being friends with two very confident, very attractive men. 
Being pushed aside by girls who shamelessly threw themselves at them or worse the ugly looks you’d get when they’d casually throw a friendly arm around you while you were out or the fact that you were hopelessly sexually inept compared to them. 
Especially seeing as those two men literally had sex for a living and well… you were still a virgin.  
It wasn’t for your lack of trying though, you’d just never seen yourself as an overly sexual person, having not even really touched yourself that much. Besides, most of the time when you try to, you can hardly ever make yourself finish.
You’d never understood when your friends would talk about their sexual experiences or toys they’d tried. You just didn’t get the interest but it was something you were definitely insecure about. Almost convinced something must be wrong with you. 
It also didn’t help that there were never any guys during High School that peaked your interest, other than maybe Eddie. But you were sure he didn’t feel the same way and didn’t want to risk ruining your friendship over a silly crush. 
So, in the past year, while Eddie and Steve were becoming more popular, staring in a bunch of different films and having a heap of different sexual experiences, you’d only found yourself in a brief relationship with a total dick. 
He was nice enough at first but had pressured you a bit more than you would have liked to do things you probably weren’t ready for. You’d eventually given in and tried to give him a blowjob but he was way too pushy and forceful and you didn’t enjoy it at all. He’d said afterwards that he’d return the favour, but after about 2 minutes kept asking over and over again if you were getting close yet. Eventually you’d just faked it for him to stop, not really feeling anything the whole time he had.
After that the relationship kind of dwindled and he’d broken up with you. There were many issues with your comparability, but he’d made a point to mention that you weren’t sexual enough. That part had really ruined your confidence to ever try anything again with someone else. 
You’d of course told Eddie and Steve about your relationship and how much of a douche he was when it all ended. They’d done their best to cheer you up and reassure you that you should never have to do anything with someone just because you’re in a relationship with them and that there was no shame in having little to no experience. 
You appreciated their words but can’t help but feel insecure in the fact that their job is to have sex and make other people feel good and you can barely even make yourself cum. 
****
It’s Thursday night, a night reserved for your weekly (when your busy schedules allowed) dinners with Eddie and Steve. They were always at your house too as you were the only one that lived alone. 
You didn’t mind though, you liked being in your little space that you had created and having the two people you loved the most inside it. 
You were especially excited for tonight as it had been about a month since you’d all be free enough to finally have dinner and you had missed them both. 
You all spoke on the phone regularly but it was different than actually being with them, missing how your body seemed to instantly relax the minute you saw them. 
Eddie must have picked up Steve as you heard the familiar sounds of his van approaching and two sets of people jump out. 
You immediately ran to the door to greet them, excitement practically bubbling out of you. They both shared your excitement, quickly pulling you into tight hugs. 
They’d picked up some food on the way and you’d already set the table, so you all sat and ate straight away. 
“So,” you say with a mouthful of food, “what did I miss in the lives of my two sex gods”. You giggle as you say the last part overly dramatic and teasing. Eddie smirks at your use of the nickname he’d given himself on many occasions as Steve just rolls his eyes at you. 
“Oh you know, same old stuff,” Eddie replied casually. 
“We’ve both just been doing a couple of different films, trying new stuff,” Steve expanded. They never seem to give you much detail, which you think you're thankful for. 
“Dazzling the world with our tallent,” Eddie not so subtly added. “Oh! And we did a threesome together the other day.”
You almost choked on the food in your mouth as you felt your eyes practically fall out of your head. “You what?”
“Yeah, well I’ve been doing more threesomes lately and we needed another guy for one and they’d asked if I knew anyone,” Eddie explained like it was the most casual thing “and I of course immediately thought of Stevie, especially because I know he’s been keen to try one.”
You took a second to process all of this new information. Your two best friends, had a threesome, together, for Steve’s first threesome. 
You tried to figure out the weird emotions you were feeling at knowing this, more thankful now than ever that they usually didn’t tell you details about their job. 
Steve and Eddie exchanged a confused look at the unreadable expression on your face, they certainly hadn’t expected this reaction. They actually weren’t sure what reaction they had expected but it certainly wasn't this. 
“Hey,” Steve tried, “it’s not like a big deal or anything, I mean it’s just work.” Steve didn’t really know why he’d said that, you knew it was work and you’d always been supportive of them both. And it’s not like you’d be jealous or anything but he needed you to say something. 
“Ouch Harrington,” Eddie teased, “not a big deal? You mean to tell me it wasn’t earth shattering, that I haven’t changed your life forever?” 
Steve just rolled his eyes and shook his head at Eddie but could help himself but laugh at him. You found yourself laughing too, finally coming back to your senses. 
“Right,” you said finally, “sorry, I mean it’s fine obviously I just guess I was kind of shocked?” 
“Yeah we get that,” Steve assured you. 
“Wait- Steve, since when do you swing that way?” you asked
Steve just shrugged in response. He didn’t really know what way he swung these days, he didn’t really care as long as he was having fun and besides, Eddie is hot and he definitely knows what he’s doing. So of course anyone would jump at the opportunity to star in a Threesome with him, right?
“He only swings that way for me,” Eddie teased while grabbing Steve’s hand from across the table and quickly brushing his lips against his knuckles, “isn’t that right?”
You giggle at Eddie’s usual overly dramatic, complete disregard of personal space flirting but don’t miss the fact that Steve doesn't pull away. You feel a pang of jealousy at how they seem closer now, they’ve shared an experience with each other that you’d never get to share with them. You’re confused as to why that hurts so much but you start to feel even more inadequate at your lack of experience. 
“You’re full of shit Munson,” Steve replies, luckily bringing you out of your thoughts as he pulls his hand away finally. You don’t miss how much he’s blushing though, and neither does Eddie. 
“Wait, you guys said threesome right?” They both nod. “So… I'm assuming that means the third person was a girl?” You’re not really sure why you asked, something inside you just compelled you to dig deeper about the whole situation. 
“Yeah, a pretty little thing,” Eddie replies.
“Mmm, she was sweet,” Steve comments. 
“Oh and so good,” Eddie expands as you feel bitterness rise in your throat. 
“Mmm”, Steve agrees through a mouthful of food. 
Of course she was good, that’s her job, you try to reason with yourself. But god you wish you could also be good at something like that. 
Your dinner continues with no other world altering revelations thankfully but you keep coming back to the fact that they’ve done a threesome together. 
You keep asking them how it was. Good.
Had they done stuff together or just to her at the same time? 
Together and to her at the same time. (You tried to ignore the ache between your legs when they’d mentioned they’d touched each other and not just her).
And many, many questions about her and what she was like and what she was good at. 
They’d kept their answers brief but from what you could decipher she was amazing. Some of the things and positions they’d mentioned seemed impossible. The fact that they had fucked her throat and practically bent her in half and both fucked her at the same time one in each hole? It seemed crazy to you. 
Every time you asked a new question you felt worse and worse about yourself but you couldn’t stop. You both needed to know everything and needed them to never talk about it again. 
Thankfully, you thought it seemed as though they hadn’t picked up on how awful you felt by the end of the night. 
But Eddie had, we’ll sort of. He knew you better than anyone and could tell you were feeling a bit insecure but mainly took your interest as being curious about the technicalities of it all. Which was also true, you couldn’t imagine much about sex with one person, let alone two. 
This gave him a wicked idea…
***** 
The next day you get home from work exhausted. All day you’d been messing up everything. You were completely exhausted, distracted and just not yourself, your mind constantly wandering to Steve and Eddie. 
You’d tossed and turned all last night after they’d left, the ache between your legs growing unbearable but again, you’d tried and failed to relieve it. 
You felt the weirdest mix of jealousy and arousal. You knew Eddie and Steve were hot but you’d tried your best to never think of them like that knowing you couldn’t have them. 
But after knowing someone had had both of them together you couldn’t help but think about what they would be like and about all of the times you could’ve had that. 
Maybe if you’d been more sexual your late night smoke sessions or the nights when you’d all stumbled home from the bars or from Eddie’s shows could’ve led to more. 
But every time you thought about that and let yourself fantasise about them, and their bodies and their lips and how they would feel all over your skin and their hands roaming all over you… you felt guilt. 
These were your best friends and you knew that thinking about this stuff would only lead to heartache. You weren’t sexual and you honestly didn’t know if you ever would be, they wouldn’t want you. Especially not now. 
Now they were more out of your league than ever. 
You’re so caught up in your thoughts of them again you don’t see it on your kitchen counter until you almost squish it with your bag: a tape. 
You pick it up to inspect it, almost certain you didn’t leave one here this morning and find a note taped to it. 
Seeing as you were so interested. 
Sprawled out in Eddie’s handwriting, complete with a winky face. 
You gasp and quickly put the tape back on the counter as you realise what’s on it. As if the tape itself was as dirty as the contents were sure to be. 
You stare at it for a moment, this is the tape. With video proof of your best friend’s threesome. You shake your head and huff off to your bedroom. Trust Eddie to do something like this. 
He was messing with you, there’s no way he’d actually want you to see it! I mean you did see another tape that one other time he showed you and Steve… but that was only to prove he’d done it!! 
God, did Steve even know Eddie dropped the tape off? Surely… right? Eddie wouldn’t drop it off if Steve didn’t know. 
You weren’t even sure why you cared that he’d given it to you; it wasn't like you were actually going to watch it. It’s not like you’d been fantasising about nothing but the contents of the tape for the last 24 hours…
I mean… if you just watched it at least you wouldn’t have to fantasise about what could be on it anymore right? 
God what am I thinking? You scold yourself. There’s no way you’re considering this. 
You get changed and start your nightly chores around the house as well as making dinner. But more times than you’d like to admit you find yourself picking up that damn tape to put it back down again.
Eventually you find yourself sitting at the table staring at it, dinner long finished and the house completely spotless. Your leg is bouncing uncontrollably as you bite the skin around your nails, there's no way you’re considering this. But, what’s the worst that could happen?
Fuck it. 
They, or at least Eddie, left it here for me. And I’m sure heaps of other people have already watched it so why would it be weird for me to? 
You rush to the living room and pop the tape in the player, sitting on the carpet in front of your tv. 
You sit nervously as the tape starts, opening with all three of them making out and touching each other on a bed. It was surreal to see Eddie and Steve on your tv and even more surreal to see them like this. 
You watch as they all slowly got undressed, your eyes bulged as you see both of their cocks spring free, heat shooting directly to your core. 
You watch as the girl sat back and started to touch herself as they both watched, fisting their cocks slowly. 
She looked so confident, you thought. So sure of herself and her body. The moans she was making were intense to say the least but it seemed like both of the boys were enjoying it. 
You felt that ugly feeling of jealousy rise in your chest once again. Oh how you wished you could be that confident, how you wished they were looking at you like that. 
You shook your head and turned off the tape quickly. That was a mistake, you don’t even want Eddie and Steve, why would you care how they were looking at her? You didn’t care. 
But the tear that slipped down your cheek betrayed you. You quickly wipe it away, annoyed at yourself. 
You decide that you’ve obviously just had a long and stressful day and that it is definitely time for bed.  
You shower quickly, doing your best to stop more tears from slipping and to try and get the images of your two best friends out of your head. 
You pick out some fresh comfy pjs and slide into bed, hoping sleep will take you quickly. 
It doesn’t. 
You toss and turn for what feels like hours, you can’t get comfy and you can’t get rid of the damn aching between your legs. 
You can’t stop thinking of them… of their bodies. How big they both are. The lustful look on their faces as they watched her in awe. Would they look at you the same if you were her? God, how their muscles tensed as they stroked themselves… 
Oh fuck this. 
You throw the blankets off yourself, suddenly overheating and plunge your fingers straight into your soaking hole, as you always do. 
Your head is filled with nothing but thoughts of Eddie, of Steve, of Eddie and Steve of them, them, them. 
You think of their toned bodies, Steve’s slightly tanned and hairy, Eddie’s pale and littered with dark ink, some you didn’t even know he had. 
You think of the lust blown looks on their faces and their laboured breaths as they touched themselves. Pretending it’s you they’re looking at like that. 
You think of their cocks, so hard and throbbing in their hands. How Steve’s was big and gloriously thick where Eddie’s was thinner but oh so long. 
You feel the coil start to tighten in your stomach but just as you think it’s about to snap it disappears. Again. 
You groan in frustration as you throw yourself out of bed. Body moving before your brain can keep up. 
You find yourself sat in front of the tv again as you start the tape where you’d turned it off just hours before. You lean back on one of your hands as the other snakes between your legs once again. Your legs bent and spread in front of you. 
You watch as they move towards her, no longer watching her touch herself. Eddie bends down and buries his head between her legs as she cries out in pleasure. He must be good. 
Steve kneels beside her and kisses her while playing with her nipples. You feel another pang of jealousy at watching Steve kiss her like that but your arousal overtakes the feeling as you continue to watch and finger yourself. 
You watch intently as they change positions. The girl is now on all fours on the bed as Steve comes to stand in front of her and Eddie behind her kneeling on the bed.  The girl starts to suck Steve’s dick, taking it so deep from the start. He lets out a guttural moan which shoots straight to your core, coating you in more slick. 
Eddie starts massaging her ass before shoving two fingers inside her. This causes her to slightly gags around Steve’s cock but this only makes Steve moan louder. 
You move your fingers faster as Steve’s moans increase, god his sounds fucking filthy. 
Eddie then lines himself up with her hole and slowly pushes all the way in till he bottoms out inside her with a deep groan. He sets a brutal pace from the start, letting out even louder moans than Steve. 
Of course he’s still loud when he fucks. 
You feel more jealousy and more arousal build in a weird mix in your stomach as they continue to fuck her. Both letting out dirty praises and sounds that you wish were directed towards you. 
Eddie then snakes his hand around to rub at her clit. You watch in awe as her legs start to shake, you’ve never been able to make your legs do that. 
She must cum then as both Steve and Eddie praise her for being such a good girl and Eddie tells her how good she feels squeezing his cock. 
Shit, you wanna be their good girl so bad. 
They both pull out then as the girl sits back on the bed panting. Much to your surprise Eddie moves over to Steve and captures his lips in a sloppy kiss. The sight alone is enough to get you so close. 
Then Steve mumbles something about wanting to have a taste of her too while shooting her a ink, you think he’s about to have a turn at eating her out but instead he drops to his knees. 
Eddie looks slightly surprised but quickly recovers and laces his hands in Steve’s golden brown hair. 
Steve licks a broad stripe from Eddie’s balls to the tip before taking the red tip in his mouth. He starts to bob his head enthusiastically and Eddie lets out a loud, almost high pitched moan. It sounds different to the other moans, more real. 
You don’t miss the look on Eddie’s face as he watches Steve, he looks almost proud and so turned on. 
This definitely isn’t the first time Steve’s done this but he still isn’t quite as good as the girl was. He gags a lot more but everytime he does Eddie tips his head back with a groan, so it must feel good. 
This sight alone has you moaning out loud, head tipping back and eyes screwing shut as you feel your orgasm finally approaching. 
They must change positions again because you hear the girl moaning too, but you’re too close to open your eyes again, too focused. 
You hear Eddie and Steve praising again, moaning out that’s it, good girl and look at you, taking us so well. Also some dirtier ones like you like that, you filthy slut and taking both our cocks so well in your dirty fucking holes. You didn’t expect it but you like those ones just as much as the nicer ones. 
You finger yourself faster as you pretend it’s you they’re talking to and finally, finally you feel the coil snap in your stomach.
You cum hard around your fingers with a high pitched gasp. Your head swimming with thoughts of Eddie and Steve. 
You see stars as you have easily the most intense one you’ve ever had, granted, that wasn’t too hard. 
Your orgasm lasts for what feels like hours but finally you start to come down from your high, head feeling dizzy and cloudy. Fingers falling from your abused hole. 
You finally open your eyes and take note of what’s happening on the screen. You’re shocked to find a close up of Eddie and Steve’s cocks fucking both her pussy and asshole. 
This snaps you out of your post-orgasm haze and you quickly jump up and turn the tape off at the sight. All previous grey morals from arousal gone. 
You slump back on the ground and rub your face as you realise what you’ve just done. You feel ashamed but also don’t? You stand on shaky legs, making your way back to your bed.
You slump down, suddenly exhausted. Tonight has been weird and has revealed some weird emotions you’re still not sure of. There’s one thought and feeling in particular that won't leave your mind though: 
You really want to fuck your best friends. 
____________________________________________________ Tagging some mutuals that may be interested: @andvys @pxrxcxa @wroteclassicaly @eddiemunsonfuxks @usedtobecooler @corrodedhawkins @prettyboyeddiemunson
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sonamytrash · 4 days
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Nothing exciting
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Tags: Levi x Reader, pregnancy, secret pregnancy, Fluff, Krista is a cutie.
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The mess hall was a cacophony of clanging silverware and low conversations, the air thick with the scent of fried onions and meat. Eren, Armin, Mikasa, Sasha, Connie, Jean, Ymir, Reiner, and Krista sat at their usual table, their eyes trained on you and Levi, who were sitting a few tables away. They had been watching you both ever since they had seen the scene at the stables, and now they couldn't help but wonder how long it had been going on for. The group had spent the better part of the last few days speculating about the nature of your relationship, with each member offering their own unique theories.
There was you, with your playful demeanor and unabashed affection. It was like a breath of fresh air in the otherwise stuffy environment. And Levi? Well, he was the strong, silent type; the rock upon which the survey corps relied.
The interactions between the two of you were fascinating to watch. Even the most casual of glances or gestures seemed to carry a weight of meaning that the others didn't quite understand. The way you both would sneak a touch or a quick brush of fingers against each other's arms as you passed one another, was enough to send the more observant scouts into a frenzy of speculation.
Sasha leaned in, her voice low but curious. "I wonder if they've been hiding this from us all this time," she mused. "They've always seemed so close, but I never would have guessed..." She trailed off, lost in thought.
As they continued to watch, Krista couldn't help but smile whenever she saw you both stealing a moment of privacy, or when Levi would blush and avert his gaze at one of your more forward advances. The air seemed charged with an electricity that was palpable even from across the room. Her curiosity getting the better of her, "Do you think they've been dating long?"
Reiner shrugged, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. "Hard to say, really. They've always been pretty close. You remember, back when we first joined up? They were inseparable even then." He turned back to his meal. "It would be reasonable to assume they have been hiding it all this time."
Armin, who had been listening quietly to the conversation, piped up. "I heard they grew up together in the underground," he said, his tone thoughtful. "They must have some pretty deep history between them, and their reasons for keeping things quiet, it isn't unusual given the nature of this line of work for them to be cautious."
Mikasa couldn't help but wonder how you must feel during the times when the scouts were beyond the walls. It was one thing to be apart for a few days or weeks, but when the missions lasted for months at a time. The thought made her heart ache for you just a little.
Ymir decided to chime in with a suggestive joke. "There must be something about the miserable bastard that makes her like him. Maybe he's packing." she says suggestively, earning a few chuckles from the others. "You guys are at the stables this afternoon, right? You'll have to tell us if anything exciting happens." She adds, looking over at Krista and Armin.
The mess hall emptied out, and the scouts went about their business. Some to train, others to muck out the stables or tend to the horses.
You were in your element when you were around the horses. You had a way with them that was both gentle and firm, earning their trust and respect without fail. The soldiers looked up to you, admiring your knowledge and your dedication. You were strong, capable, and unapologetically yourself.
Which is why it seemed so unusual when Hange stopped by and told you to be careful around the horses, "Don't push yourself too hard and to make sure to gave the soldiers more work to do." Their words were softly spoken, meant only for you, but they carried weight nonetheless. Krista and Armin overhead the conversation and quickly averted their gaze, looking at one another with the same questionable look. Hearing you insist that you were fine and not to worry. It wasn't long before the captain himself made an appearance, walking straight over to you, his expression softening but still relaying something that only you seemed to understand as you sighed at him, leaving the stables.
After mucking out the stalls and exercising the horses, Krista was keen to hop into the showers. As she turned the corner, she let out a sigh of frustration as she approached the bathroom door, an out of order sign taped to it. Her heart sank. "Great," she muttered under her breath. The alternative facilities weren't as nice or warm as the main showers they would have to do. With a sigh, she decided to brave the less-frequented bathroom at the other wing end of the building.
As she approached the familiar bathroom door, she could hear muffled sounds coming from within. Curious, she placed her ear against the wood, and she heard someone retching violently, followed by the sound of someone vomiting into the toilet. She quickly knocked on the door. There was no reply, so she knocked again, a little harder this time. "Excuse me, are you okay in there?" She asked, concerned.
The sound of the door swinging open made her jump. Your face was pale and clammy, "Oh, hi Krista," your voice soft. "I didn't expect anyone else to be here. The water in here is always cold, you know that, right?" You wiped your mouth with the back of your hand, a blush creeping across your cheeks.
Krista swallowed hard, her heart still racing. "Are you okay?" she asked concerned, her voice barely above a whisper. She couldnt help but notice that you were wearing your casual clothes, and the faint outline of a bump was visible beneath your shirt. Her eyes widened, the conversation between you and Hange at the stables, the captains attitude towards you still doing strenuous activities all made sense very quickly.
You smiled at her realisation, "Well, I'm not feeling my best right now, but I'll be fine." You paused, leaning against the door frame. "And I guess this means the cat is out of the bag." You chuckle to yourself.
"Look, Krista, there's something I need you to promise me." Your voice taking on a gentle but serious tone. "You can't tell anyone about this, you understand?" You gestured to your midsection, your fingers grazing the fabric of your shirt. "My uniform just about hides it for now, I know it won't be long before it's too obvious. But it would just be easier to keep things quiet for as long as possible. You know how it is around here, people talk." You explain.
Krista nodded. "I-I won't say anything, I promise." She bit her lip, feeling both honoured that you trusted her with the information, still completely shocked.
"Thank you, Krista." You reply relieved, "I don't know what I'm going to do. The survey corps isn't exactly known for its family-friendly policies." Your brow furrowed, and you ran a hand through your hair, tugging at the roots as you let out an exasperated sigh.
Krista nodded understandingly, not used to seeing you like this. Her usual passion began to shine through in an effort to be supportive and positive about the situation. A baby was surely a wonderful thing. "I'm sure there's got to be a way to make it work. You're a valuable member of the team. We need you here! and I'm sure Captain Levi will do whatever it takes to make it all work out to-" She bit her lip, hesitant before continuing, realising she had just assumed Levi was the father, confirming your previous comment about how people gossip around the headquarters. "It is Levi's, right?" She asked, blushing furiously, her voice barely above a whisper. Your face lit up, and you smiled at the mention of Levi's name as you let out a small giggle.
"Is it that obvious, huh?" You ask, slightly embarrassed that your relationship with the captain seems to have become common knowledge, you had both done such a good job of hiding it for so long. "That's one of the reasons I need you to keep it between us. You know how he is." You say, rolling your eyes playfully "He can be a real pain about our private life. Hange knowing makes him nervous enough." You chuckle.
Krista smiles sweetly and nods, "How did Captain Levi take it?" she finally asks, her voice curious, the question was burning in the back of her mind and she knew if she didn't ask now, she would never find out. The smaller details and intricacies of your relationship were fascinating to her. Having watched from afar all these months.
You hesitated for a moment, then smiled, it wasn't like you had been able to share this news with many people. "He was... surprised, at first," you chuckled. "But once he got over the shock, he was actually really happy. He's been so supportive, you know? I know he doesn't come accross as the fatherly type, but I know... I know he'll be a great dad." You said affectionately, resting a hand on your small bump. Krista smiled brightly, reaching out to take your other hand and squeezing it lightly.
"Congratulations, that's amazing, really! And a little scary, too, I imagine." She said thoughtfully. "But when you're ready, everyone will support you. Of that I'm certain." She said in an effort to reassure you. You smiled at her "Thank you, Kris. I appreciate it."
The next morning, as the group walked past the stables, Krista saw you sat down, leaving the more strenuous tasks to the cadets, Levi by your side drinking tea quietly, keeping an eye on you no doubt. You smiled sweetly as your eyes met hers, and you gave her a knowing wink. She smiled back at you, Ymir raised an eyebrow. "What was that about?" Krista shook her head, "Nothing exciting."
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onlyjaeyun · 4 months
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engenes, hear me tf out
chaconne, sacrifice and blind are siblings. sacrifice is the oldest and blind the youngest, thats why chaconne hits the hardest as the middle child.
still monster, mixed up and let me in are best friends, they've known each other since elementary school and at one point mixed up had a crush on still monster but never confessed
given-taken and i need the light are half siblings, same mom different dads; g-t the older one
bite, fever and drunk-dazed used to be super close with tamed-dashed but t-d kinda annoyed them all so they decided to become a trio
paradoxx invasion, karma and pass the mic are fucking triplets and every teacher's nightmare. always starting random discussions and arguments just to go "did you hear that? i wouldn't let that slide"
bills, polaroid lovd, 10 months and not for sale are the pretty girl best friends who never gatekeep anything and always help you out no matter what. they send you their notes and usually one of them is school president
criminal love and one in a billion are the siblings that never talk to each other in the hallways but are actually best friends
orange flower and blossom are twins with different hair structures
karma and shout out used to hate each other but became best friends in middle school and have been inseparable ever since
upper side dreamin and go big or go home are the infamous black and orange cat duo, everyone's favorites yet also lowk annoying
and sweet venom is the new kid on the block and has yet to find their spot
ofc, fate and foreshadow are neighbors who grew up together, lost track of each other just to become the bestest friends again after a few years
I FORGOT BLESSED CURSED 🤕
blessed-cursed was hated by the bite me, fever d-d crew before they became best friends
that's it lol
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gomi-panda · 2 months
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◇ A Few Headcanons About the R1999 Characters. ◇
●♡● All Very Fluffy! ●♡●
○ Pavia is a horrible cook. I mean, terrible. He usually just grabs meals at restaurants or TV dinners, throwing the leftovers to the wolves (literally) -- that being said, his mother was a fantastic, meticulous cook. Although he's never met her, he wants to try and learn to cook in a similar fashion as her.
○ Zima often is too anxious to communicate with people face to face. As such, sometimes he allows his birds to take letters or notes to different people, using them as a personal mail system. His English writing isn't quite the best yet, although some magical enhancement fixes that.
○ TTT knows everything about pop culture or the latest TV hit... as someone stuck in some TVs, she of course is constantly plugged into that. If there's any gossip going through the channels or news, she knows it. Although, strangely, her channels are somehow still tuned to what they were back in her Era, on the same timeline. For all the arcanists who are from eras newer than hers, she desperately tries to tell them not to spoil any given event unless absolutely necessary. Of course, a lot of the more mischievous arcanists take advantage of this to mess with her.
○ Erick has claimed a portion of the wild area as her own, claiming it's her domain. No one argues.
○ An-An Lee and Horropedia constantly banter about horror movies. They've been inseparable ever since An-An was summoned to the suitcase -- everyone senses trouble brewing thanks to this duo.
○ Zima and Voyager get along swimmingly, and Zima has pretty much adopted Voyager as his daughter. This is because both of them share common loves; nature, the arts, and silence. At times, Voyager may visit Zima while he's writing, and play her violin as a calming soundtrack to soothe his nerves and coax inspiration.
○ The Knight is always awake, as he doesn't have a body that needs to be charged any longer. However, he still enjoys his freedom at night by perusing the many books in the library within the suitcase, all from dozens of eras. Sometimes he even reads old fairy stories from his Era, and even explains their origins to others -- especially the kids, as he sometimes gives them tales of heroism to entertain them!
○ Medicine Pocket sometimes sleeps on the floor, eats their food while sitting cross legged on the floor, or wakes up the others at dawn... basically, every doglike mannerism you can imagine a human can have while still being somewhat civilized, they probably have it. They also have especially strong senses, and once sensed the identity of another arcanist entering the suitcase again by scent alone.
○ Horropedia once pranked the other arcanists in a Scream-style adventure -- where he convinced them he finally went nuts. There was a copious amount of horror references throughout as he called each prank-ie, asking "wanna make a scary movie?" (/ref) , and the only person involved who understood them all was Blonney. Horropedia won't get over that, and he was way too happy about it.
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ceriseheaven · 1 year
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bro i don‘t know, but i somehow need a fanfic where eddie and jason gets into a heated fight because jason starts to insult eddie’s girlfriend (reader) because she’s with the school freak and that she is disgusting that she is touching him; kissing him etc. and when jason says something what get into eddie’s skin, he started to throw hard punches at jason while the people there try to get eddie of jason but there’s no chance cause eddie is to much into rage and etc.
idk i just thought about this a whole time and i am a sucker for this honesty. also happy halloween!👻
okay so obviously it isn't halloween anymore and this is nothing but a testament to how long it takes me to get to and finish requests sometimes. i'm a horrible person.
i hope this isn't as bad as it felt while i was writing certain parts of it.
warnings: eddie beats tf out of jason, mentions of blood and broken bones and just overall violence.
~
you never really belonged with the popular kids, the cool kids. the only reason they ever let you in with them was because of you best friend, the queen of hawkins high, chrissy cunningham.
you've known chrissy almost your entire life. first met in elementary school when she tripped over her undone laces and scratched her knee, you helped her to the nurse and ditched your classes to stay with her until her mom picked her up. since then you've been inseparable despite how different you two were, you complemented each other in a way nobody understood so when you got to high school, there was noway she'd leave you out on your own devices.
chrissy was too kind and too sweet for her own good. she's the type of person to fit in wherever she goes because she's just that lovable. it was hard to say the same for yourself, you were more closed off, introverted, you didn't let people in easily so it was no surprise to you that they didn't welcome you in with open arms the way the did chrissy.
to make matters worse, during your days at the school you started leaning more and more into the outcasts, the loners, the freaks as they've been called. to one specific freak in particular and it wasn't too long after when you started going out with him.
it started during math class. he showed up late and didn't know you had a test that day. you've heard a rumor that he failed that class one too many times and decided to help him, part because you felt bad that he had to retake his senior year several times because of one class and part because of your clandestine little crush.
when the teacher wasn't looking, you switched your papers. taking his empty one and giving him yours with all the answers and an empty space at the top so he could write his name there. his head turned to you so quickly he almost snapped it and he stared at you like you've grown six heads, nobody's ever helped him before and the way you just did was extremely suspicious to him especially when you gave him a smile as you went to hand in the empty paper, fully aware that you'll fail the test.
he brushed it off thinking you probably know he deals drugs and you helped him for a discount so for days, he waited for you to approach him to make a deal then he waited some more.. and waited and waited and waited but nothing ever happened. you never came. you didn't want anything from him, you just helped him with no ulterior motives.
a few days later he decided to gather up all his courage and talk to you, thank you and the rest soon became history.
you hit it off quickly, you were more alike than you've expected. you had similar hobbies, both of you pretty artistic and into the same type of music which was a big thing you've bonded over. eddie couldn't believe someone in hawkins shared his taste, let alone it be a 'popular pretty girl'
you told him that you hated being called that, popular, because it just wasn't true. you sat with them and walked with them but you weren't one of them, never have been. only reason you stayed around was for your friend, she never left your side and you couldn't leave hers.
for a while chrissy was the only one who knew about your relationship with eddie. she knew you'd never give the jocks a chance. chiseled, clean cut boys in khakis who have the personality of a wooden spoon, drive a car their daddies paid for and go on to marry their high school sweethearts only to cheat on them five years into the marriage tops weren't your type. she knew that so she wasn't shocked when you told her that you've fallen for the town pariah, the guy at the bottom of the social food chain, the freak.
she was worried for you at first because just like everybody else, she only saw who eddie presented himself as, only saw his mean streak and outrageous behaviors. the things he used to shelter and protect himself, not who he was underneath them. but once you've explained to her that he was nothing like what people make of him, she immediately trusted your judgement, "you've always been a better judge of character than me", she said and told you that she's happy you've found someone who was the match to your fire, your twin flame.
unlike chrissy, the rest of the group weren't supportive of your relationship with the freak. they shunned you out and exiled you from their inclusive circle which you were internally grateful for. you hated each and every single one of them and you were scrapping for a reason to leave then they went and handed it to you on a silver plate.
eddie warned you about this happening. he even suggested keeping your relationship a secret, he was okay with being your meeting behind the school or at the bench in the woods but you turned that offer down before he even finished making it. you told him you loved him and you were proud of having him as your boyfriend, you were dating the kindest, hottest, most loving and most talented guy in hawkins and you'd be damned if you didn't show him off.
he's never had someone be proud of having him like that, most people outside of his uncle and his dnd circle didn't want to be associated with him so hearing you tell him those things felt like you ripped off an old bandaid and started healing his wounds instead of just covering them and calling it a day while they bleed under the plaster.
and that is when his protective streak over you begun.
he knew that being "the freak's girlfriend" was gonna come with more cons than pros, if there's any pros at all, and he was going to be damned before he allows them to treat you the way they've been treating him. he was used to being trashed, being insulted and pushed around so he was more than determined to make sure you never have to face the same circumstances he did.
but he was only human after all and he couldn't be everywhere all at once, couldn't shelter you from every near and far possible threats and it was especially hard when you were consistently insisting that you're okay and you can handle things by yourself. a fact he was too aware of but still, he's never had someone to call his before so it was only natural that he felt this immense, almost primal need to protect you.
during lunch break, you told eddie you needed to go see chrissy. she wasn't doing too well with her mental health and she needs her best friend. being with jason was weighing hard on her, behind the smile he puts on display in front of a crowd, he was a monster behind closed doors. you told her to break up with him, told her a million times that he doesn't deserve her but you're always met with the same response, "i can't leave him, my mom would kill me", she'd say and you'd tell her that being with him is also slowly killing her but it was all in vain, she was stuck and you couldn't afford to get her out. the only thing you could offer her was a safe space to fall into.
your meeting with chrissy under the stairs was cut short with the ever known preacher voice of her douchebag of a boyfriend interrupted your conversation as he jogs up to the both of you. "hey chris.." he quirks an eyebrow at your and fling one arm around chrissy's shoulder, "well well as if it isn't the freak's very own girlfriend" he tugs her closer, glaring down at her. "what are you doing talking to this piece of filth chris?"
she keeps her head down, avoiding his stare at all costs, crossing her arms over her chest. "jason let's just go"
"no no what were you saying to her?" he steps up to you, this time the fire in his eyes is burning at you. "trying to sell her drugs like you trailer trash boyfriend?" he spits out with venom.
"jason don.."
"i was just leaving." you cut chrissy off knowing she'll be in trouble if she defends you, keeping your eyes sharp on jason as you move from under the staircase and into the school's hallway.
he follows you, grabbing your arm so hard you can feel his fingernails dig into your skin over your clothes. "if i ever see you talking to chris again i'll snap you in half. understand that, dirty whore?"
your arm starts to ache but still you refuse to let him see any sign of weakness or pain that he's inflicting onto you. "jeez carver you've got a stick up your ass this morning or something?"
he tugs you closer to him, his grip still strong on your arm. "the fuck did you just say to me?" his white of his eyes begin turning red, you can see his fury and feel it as he's breathing down on you. you remain speechless, you've never been this close to him and seeing him like that nothing short of terrifying. "didn't think so."
he goes to let go of your arm but before he could make his next move, he's thrown across the room into the brick wall. you didn't even see how it happened, in a blink of an eye he was no longer standing in front of you but instead laying on the ground.
loud gasps come from the people passing in the hallway and you turn your gaze to see what, rather more who, they're looking at, your eyes falling on your boyfriend. your boyfriend who you left sitting with his friends at their lunch table, laughing and joking about silly things, unbothered by life around him.
now he's standing with his chest heaving and his pupils blown out in rage. before you can walk to him and pull him away from the situation, he goes to jason on the ground, turning him over before throwing a punch to the right side of his face, so vicious that it knocked one of his teeth out and made blood spill out of mouth.
you've always known eddie had rage. he never showed it in front of you or anyone for that matter but it was a no brainer. nothing in his life has ever gone right or fair, before you nobody has ever been kind to him. he grew up on hurt and violence, he didn't let them grow into him but they were always there buried in the deepest pits of his soul, screeching and threatening to crawl out at any given minute. the mere lightest touch was the only thing his trigger needed to make space for the furious demons inside of him to make their way out, and he was given more than a light touch.
another punch lands on jason's face before he can comprehend the first one, turning his face to the other side. you can hear the sound of bones breaking despite the sound of screaming that surrounds you, some people yelling for eddie to stop while others are chanting 'FREAK FREAK FREAK FREAK'. the only thing you could do was watch as it unfolds. you couldn't move, you couldn't speak. your entire body went still, the only part of you that remained working was your mind and it was running too fast for you to be able to keep up with it.
jason managed to get his hands around eddie's neck, choking him but eddie was completely unperturbed by getting his airflow cut out. instead of trying to get jason's hands to get them off his neck, he grabbed his wrist and twisted backwards until his knuckles touched his arm, breaking it.
the chanted and yelling suddenly stopped once they realized how serious this was, the only person left screaming was jason at his broken wrist and nose. he ended up dropping his hands from eddie's neck, the pain was too much. "what the hell have you done! you broke my fucking hand you fre.."
before jason could finish his sentence, eddie grabbed him by his letterman jacket and got up, dragging jason to his feet too, pinning him up against the wall so hard it made the lockers shake.
"touch her again and you'll wish it's only your hand that's broken" eddie spat out in jason's face before lifting his knee up, letting it make contact with jason's crotch so harshly that he leaned forward and fell on eddie's shoulder but before he could, eddie hurled him onto the ground then crouched down next to him, pulling his hair and forcing jason to stare at him. "if you do as little as breathe in her direction, i'll fucking kill you, understand?"
"you really are a freak munson" jason says through his teeth and cries, eddie rolls his eyes at the comment.
"yeah yeah tell me something i don't know" eddie lifts jason's head by his hair higher then hit it against the floor, breaking his nose further and possibly his jaw as well. "now tell me something new, did you understand what i said?" eddie repeats himself, his nostrils flaring with his heavy breathing.
"fuck!" jason yells in agony as his 'friends' stare at him, keeping their distance from the scene and wearing their fear on their faces. eddie pulls jason's head back again, threatening to smash it against the floor once more but jason speaks, "yes yes! i understand i get it i do i understand" he begs but his attempt to stop eddie's next move is unfruitful as he throws jason's face against the ground again.
eddie was about to get up from his crouched position when his eyes meet chrissy's trembling frame standing by your frozen figure. he knows about the mental abuse jason has inflicted on your friend, he's seen her cry in your arms countless of times, he had to drive her with you back to his trailer because she needed an escape from him and her mother. chrissy was like your sister and if she's family to you then that's what she is to him too.
"you'll leave chrissy alone too. if i see you with either one of them, you're dead carver. dead" jason doesn't have enough strength to talk back, only babbles out something incoherent as eddie gets up, throwing one last kick to jason's ribs with his booted foot.
he turns to the crowd of people who were stood there watching him, the principle included. all of them staring at him with terror in their eyes and their mouths agape. "hope you enjoyed the show, come back same time tomorrow." he says sardonically before bringing his gaze to you and his eyes immediately soften.
"baby.." worry begins filling up his chest at the possibility of you thinking he's a monster now that you've seen what he's capable of doing, now that you've seen another's blood on his hands. as he walks over to you, he thinks of every reaction you might give. his mind wanders off to the worst places, to you leaving him now that you've seen 'the freak'
your reaction was nothing like he had expected or could have imagined. out of all the possible scenarios of what could've happened once he was within your arms' length, the one thing he didn't expect to happen was for you to wrap your arms around his torso and enveloping him in a hug this tight.
his arms stay on his sides, mostly out of shock but also because he doesn't want to get any of jason's blood on your body. "sweetheart are you okay?" he asks after a few seconds of silence and feel you nod against his chest where he feels a little wetness on his shirt.
"i'm okay yeah, are you okay?" you pull away from the hug and wipe your tears with the back of your hand, tears you didn't even know spilled and eddie gently grabs your wrist.
"show me your arm. where he grabbed you, show me your arm.. please" he says completely blowing off the fact that you're still standing in a hallway full of people, people who are calling the ambulance and some the police.
"not here but i promise i'm fine, i'm fine baby i'm okay.." you tell him and place your hands on his cheeks, bringing him down to give him a kiss. "and it's all thanks to you"
he chuckles against your lips, deepening the kiss, unbothered by the people calling out his name and the sound of the incoming police sirens. "yeah well.. he had it coming." he pulls away enough to stare into your eyes, "besides, nobody calls my girl a whore except for me"
you laugh and lightly smack his chest but your laughter comes to an end when you see two police officers coming up from behind him. "eddie.."
"edward munson, you're under arrest for the assault of jason carver. you have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you in court. you have the right to hire an attorney, if you can't afford an attorney one will be provided for you. do you understand the rights i just read to you and with these rights in mind, do you wish to speak?" one of the officers say as the other grabs eddie's bloody hands and put them in handcuffs behind his back.
"handcuffs? didn't know you guys were kinky like that. what's next? you'll gag me? spank my ass and call me a bad boy?" he jokes as he remains carelessly nonchalant about the entire situation, it isn't his first time being arrested and it isn't going to be his last so he might as well have fun with it. "just so you know, i'm into all of that." he makes eye contact with you when he says that, winking your way before he walks out of the school property with a smug proud sway in his hips less like he's about to go into a police station and more like he's about to go on stage to give the performance of his life.
he has no regret of what he's done and he wants everybody to know that.
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musings-of-a-rose · 1 year
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I Never Stopped Loving You - Part 2
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I Never Stopped Loving You - Part 2
Pairing: Joel Miller x OFC “Catie”
Word Count: 2500+
Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!
Warnings: Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story. 
Notes: I just had to write this part 2! It's all fluff and a little heart hurt. 
**If you want to be added to the taglist, join here or let me know!
❤If you enjoy the fic, please consider giving me a warm beverage! (It is not required in any way!)
**Reader is not described
Main Masterlist
Joel Miller Masterlist
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<<I Never Stopped Loving You - Part 1
"I just found her. I don't want to lose her so soon." Joel’s eyes are round and worried, tears that he refuses to let fall are building up at the corners.
Benny, Poppy’s long time boyfriend, had finally come to us 4 months after Joel and Ellie moved into Jackson to ask our permission to marry her. It’s not tradition anymore, but Poppy had read it in a book and mentioned how romantic it sounded, so naturally, Benny had to do it. He’d asked Tommy too, as he had been like a father to Poppy since we moved here 10 years ago. I had said yes right away, but Joel clenched his jaw shut, a gruff “No” falling from his downturned lips. I smiled at Benny, telling him to give us some time and sending him out the door.
"She's 20, Joel."
"That's young"
"It is, but not for this world. Lives are cut short every day, so when 2 people love each other, they get married."
His broad shoulders slump, slightly defeated. "... I just got here."
"She's not going anywhere, Joel. Just a few houses down."
His jaw clenches, thoughts racing behind his brown eyes.
"What about this Benny guy?"
"He's a sweet kid. Too much energy to know what to do with, but he loves our daughter more than himself. You know he technically already asked her to marry him."
Joel’s eyes snap to mine. "He what? After making that big of a fuss of asking us-"
"When we first moved here. Poppy was 10, nearly 11 and she had never been around other kids, let alone attend actual school and have neighbors or other people around. Her whole life had been Lucia and I. Benny introduced himself the first day and they became fast friends. I think it was that first week he asked her to marry him."
"What did she say?"
"She laughed and said 'I'm 10. What do I wanna get married for?'"
"Good for her." 
"I think there was a bit about "stinky boys" too. But that didn't deter him. They were inseparable. And a few years later, they started dating. I wasn't surprised but she was. And they've been together ever since."
"She loves him?"
"So much. As much as I love you."
HIs face softens, but the scowl remains, one tear betraying him by slowly falling down his cheek. I sit next to him on the couch, placing my hand on his thigh. I don’t say anything, waiting for him to speak.
“I only just found out I had another…I have a daughter. I can’t lose her too.”
I place my hand on his cheek, gently turning his face to mine. I swipe my thumb across his cheek to wipe away a tear, stubble softly scraping my skin as his watery eyes find mine.
“You will never lose her, Joel. She never thought in a million years she would ever meet you. I never-” a lump rises in my throat and I swallow hard “-she has been up your ass these last 4 months for a reason. She loves you, Joel. She’s not going to leave you. Just move a few doors down.”
—----
“I don’t understand why, Uncle Tommy! He knows I love Benny and he loves me.”
Tommy tosses some hay into the stall in front of him before turning to face his niece. 
“He’ll come around, don’t worry Pop.”
“I don’t know…he seemed pretty set on saying no. Ugh, and we had this whole thing planned out. I never planned for dad saying no.”
Tommy moves to the next horse stall, repeating the action. “Joel would want to know Benny and he doesn’t. He only just got here-”
“He’s been here for 4 months, Uncle Tommy.”
“Yeah, but he’s spent most of the time with you and your mom. As he should.”
Poppy studies her uncle’s form. “He could’ve just said yes. I mean, Benny and I have been together for forever, but I guess dad is bent on not supporting me.”
Tommy drops the last bit of hay in the stall, hand hesitating over the next bit of hay he’ll have to put down. 
“He only just got you, Pop.”
Poppy blows a raspberry. “I’m not going anywhere. Just a few houses down.”
A look washes over Tommy’s face and Poppy sees him fighting back tears.
“It’s different for him. He gets another chance with you.” It’s quiet when Tommy speaks, but he may as well have been yelling. Poppy’s eyes grow wide and she sits there silent for a few moments.
“Sarah.”
Tommy nods, his eyes coming present from the flashback that he had been on. “Sarah.”
Poppy lets out a puff of air. “Guess I’m the stubborn ass, huh?”
Tommy smiles and nudges her shoulder with his. “You come by it honestly.”
—----
The front door opens, Poppy walking in the kitchen shortly after. 
“Hey mom.”
“Hey Pop.”
“Is dad home?”
“He is. He’s upstairs. Everything ok?”
Poppy nods. “Yeah.”
Poppy heads upstairs, pausing at the door to her parent’s room before she knocks.
“Dinner ready?”
“It’s me.”
“Oh, Pop. Uh, come on in.”
Poppy enters the room and sees Joel standing in front of the mirror, hair slicked back from the water from his shower. Joel opens his mouth to speak but before he can, Poppy crosses the room and throws her arms around him, squeezing a little. Joel hesitates, momentarily caught off guard by the abrupt display of affection, before wrapping his arms around her and hugging her back.
“I’m not leaving, dad.”
Joel’s grip stiffens slightly before pulling back. “What?”
Poppy looks up at him, love pouring out of her gaze. “Benny has a house for us just a few doors down. I’m not leaving. I only just got you."
Joel is quiet for several moments. “You had Uncle Tommy.”
“I did. But he’s not my dad. You are.”
Joel chokes back tears as he stares into his daughter’s eyes, sad for the years he missed watching her grow. 
“Do you love him?”
Poppy smiles. “I do.”
“And does he love you?”
She smiles wider. “He does. He really does, daddy.”
Joel’s jaw clenches, his eyes looking off for a few moments before looking at his daughter.
“Alright, then.”
Poppy’s entire face lights up. “Really? Oh, dad I-”
“Just remind him I’m a really good shot. And so is Uncle Tommy.”
“Psshh, have you seen mom shoot? Benny should be worried about her. Why do you think he sucks up to her?”
Joel chuckles. “As he should.”
—----
Weddings in Jackson are a big event, everyone in town chipping in to help with everything, from decorating to cooking, to making Poppy’s dress. It’s something everyone looks forward to.
Joel stands in the living room, waiting for his daughter to come down the stairs. His hands flex at his sides and he shifts his weight nervously. He glances up at the top of the stairs and his breath catches in his throat, tears immediately welling in the corners of his eyes. She's the spitting image of her mother.
Poppy has on a beautiful white dress, hand-sewn by the seamstress in town. It's floor length, a white pattern of poppies is embroidered into the dress. Her hair is twisted and braided up, whisps framing her face. She wobbles slightly at the top of the stairs, the heels her friend had someone found clicking on each wooden step as she descends. When she reaches the bottom, she turns to Joel, a smile wife on her face. 
"Well, dad? Do I look ok?"
"You-" Joel let's out a breath, a smile tugging up the corners of his mouth "-you're absolutely beautiful." 
Tears well in her eyes now. "Thanks, dad."
Joel offers her his arm and it's then he notices the butterfly clip in her hair, which isn't really her style. 
"Butterfly?" He asks, eyebrows raised in question. 
"Oh. Yeah. For Sarah. I wanted a piece of her with me today and mom said she really liked butterflies. This was all I could find. Oh, and Uncle Tommy gave me this."
She pulls out a small photograph, handing it to Joel. He looks down at it and his jaw slams shut, willing his tears to not fall. 
Staring up at him, was Sarah, clad in her soccer uniform, a trophy in her hand and Joel standing proudly behind her. He stares at it for several moments before Poppy reaches out, gently taking the photo and sliding it into his coat pocket. 
"Now she's definitely with us."
Joel pulls Poppy in, hugging her tightly, trying to hide the tears that had fallen from his eyes. 
"It's perfect. She would've loved that."
Poppy hugs her dad back, hiding her own tears. They embrace for a few moments before hearing the music start outside that was their cue to head out the door. Joel pulls back, trying to covertly wipe the tears off his face while his daughter does the same. He offers her his arm again and Poppy takes it, lacing her arm in his. 
"Don't let me fall, dad."
"Never. I got you, baby girl."
Joel had faced clickers and much worse. But giving his daughter away that he'd only just met was one of the hardest things he'd had to do. Even Joel had to admit that Benny was perfect for her and loved her fiercely. They were a perfect match. 
When he danced with Poppy during the father daughter dance, he could almost picture Sarah, spinning around and laughing as he danced with her too. He knew that she would have loved Poppy.
—---
A couple months after the wedding, Poppy and Benny came over for dinner. We usually had dinner together once a week, Ellie sliding right into our family. She's hilarious and spunky and the thought of Joel having to escort her across the country makes me laugh. 
After dinner, Ellie takes off with Dina and the rest of us settle on the couches. Joel offers everyone a drink, even Benny, whom he'd grown fond of over the last few months. Although he'd never admit it. 
Poppy takes the glass and holds it, swirling around the contents as she stares at it. 
"Actually, Dad…mom… I, well, we want to talk to you." 
"I told you, my knees aren't what they used to be. Tommy said he'd help with the roof-"
"No. That's…that's not it." Joel sits next to her and the couch and she turns to face him, mouth opening and closing as if she's trying to figure out how to say something. She takes Joel's hand and squeezes it, looking up at him with her eyes that she inherited from him.
"Dad…I'm pregnant."
"Oh sweetie!" I'm on my feet, crossing the room and throwing my arms around her. "I'm so excited for you! How are you feeling? Is the morning sickness OK? I can't remember how it was with you because of what was happening but I do remember vomiting a lot. Have you gone to Lucia yet? Oh and-"
"Mom, chill. I'm only 6 or 7 weeks along." The smile she gave me falters when she looks back at Joel, who hadn't moved, a hard look on his face. 
"Dad? Did you hear what I said?"
Benny shifts in his seat, looking anywhere but at Joel, ready to run if he made a move. 
"Dad?" Poppy sits back down, taking his hands again. "You're going to be a grandpa." 
That broke him. 
"A…grandpa?"
Poppy smiles softly. "Yeah. I mean we won't know if it's a boy or girl until it's born, but if it's a boy, we're naming it Will after Benny's brother. He died a few years after…everything. And if it's a girl…well, we wondered if it would be ok to name her Sarah."
Joel's eyes are wide, big and brown and they stare into his daughter's. 
"You'd want to name her Sarah?"
"Yeah. Only if that's ok-"
"I would love that. She would've loved that." He blinks rapidly, ridding his eyes of the tears that had gathered. 
"A grandpa. Me. I never thought I'd…" He lets out a laugh, hugging his daughter tightly and shaking Benny's nervous hand.
—----
Several months later, Joel is by his daughter's side at her request, her small hand in his as she squeezes it through another contraction.
"Ok, one more push, Pop, and this baby will be here." Lucia gets ready and nods at Joel and Benny. 
"One more push, sweetheart, and we can finally hold our baby." Benny rubs her back up and down, applying pressure to her hips to help alleviate the pain, just as the midwife had shown him. 
"I can't! It's too hard!" 
Joel leans in, getting level with her face as she rocks back and forth slightly, on all fours.
"I won't pretend this isn't hard as shit. But if it's one thing I do know is that you're as tough as your momma. Probably tougher. And I know you can do this. You got this, baby girl. You've got this." Joel squeezes her hand and she nods, taking a deep breath. 
One more push, and their daughter Sarah was born, screaming loudly at the world. 
—-
We stayed with them that first night, in case they needed anything at their request. It's late, about 3am or so and I hear the floorboards creaking outside our door. I glance over and see that Joel isn't next to me, so I quietly get up and make my way out of the door. Peeking into Poppy and Benny's room, I see them both sound asleep on the bed, but no Sarah. I head downstairs to the living room, but stop just short of the doorway, listening as Joel's voice carries to me, the song he had been singing ending.
"You know, I wanted to be a singer in another life. Play guitar and all that. I'll teach you someday."
He hums a little tune to Sarah and I poke my head around the corner, taking in the scene in front of me. Joel is standing, bouncing his arms and swaying side to side, all gentle movements as he stares down and the bundle of blankets in his arms, Sarah's small face poking out from between the folds. 
"Your aunt would've just melted over you. She loved babies. Was always askin' me when me and your grandma were gonna have one. I'll tell you all about her one day." He pauses, clenching his jaw in an attempt to hold back tears. 
"I never knew about your mom until she was already grown. But I promise, I will always be here for you." 
Sarah looks so small in his arms, his broad shoulders looking impossibly large as he holds her tiny body to him, smiling down at her as she continues to sleep. 
"I got you, baby girl."
—----
A Second Chance (a one shot written by @theewokingdead )>>
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aita-blorbos · 3 months
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AITA for not telling my kids their mother is still alive?
I (34M) have two adopted kids, T (15F) and A (23M). T came to me after being abandoned by her father when she was 8, and I've raised her as my own ever since.
A is a little more complicated, since he isn't legally mine. Long story short, I sorta forced him to screw himself over career-wise for the greater good, so the least I could do is offer him a job to replace the one he had to sacrifice. He reminds me of my younger, more naive self, so I've been trying to teach him the ways of the world (I'm pretty sure he hates me for it.)
To get down to brass tacks, their mother (40F, previously assumed dead) contacted me recently, revealing that not only is she alive, but that T and A are biological half-siblings (none of us were aware of this beforehand). Moreover, I and both kids have met her (and her adopted son (14M))! According to her, she lost her memory and eyesight in a traumatic accident and is only just now getting bits and pieces back after vision restoration surgery.
After dropping both bombshells, she asked me to take care of them and keep all of this secret. She said she needs to rediscover herself. I promised to keep her secret.
However, the more I see A and T interacting (they're practically inseparable, T follows A everywhere), the worse I feel about keeping my promise. Even though they've only known each other for less than a year, T has a nickname for A and they are very protective over each other. It's like they were raised together. Both have no other living family that I know of.
I get that kids are a lot of work, but why can't their mother be in their lives now that she has her memory back, given that she felt comfortable taking on another kid? T and A deserve to know they still have a mom!
I care for both of them so much, even if A and I still have a tense relationship, and I don't think it's my secret to tell, but I'm afraid that if I keep it from them for too long I will no longer have a son that wants anything to do with me.
AITA?
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t1bb1zoey · 1 year
Text
Okay, I've had time to process and internalize the TianShan kiss (A KISS OMFG!!!!!!).
I have many thoughts about this chapter in general, so before the TianShan stuff ...
First half of Chapter Thoughts:
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So when the chapter begins, we have the aftermath of the fight. I do not care where they have dragged She Li off to, and I also do not care (for now) how He Cheng is going to acertain that She Li is no longer an issue to Jian Yi (and by extension, Mo) again. Like, how has She Li been totally defeated? What threats will be made to keep him away? They still go to the same school afterall, and She Li is a psychopath. It was always my understanding that She Li was sort of a low ranking underling to someone somewhere higher up on the mafia food chain. He comes from a rich household like He Tian, so I assumed his family had ties to the mafia too somehow. But He Cheng reassures Mr. Jian that it was just kids fighting and nothing to do with "the other side".
WHO IS THE OTHER SIDE THEN? Folks, we've got a bigger enemy coming up in the story or something. If there are people from the other side looking to harm Jian Yi or He Tian, and He Cheng considers She Li to be just "kid stuff", imagine how bad this new enemy will be. I guess the She Li scare is going to mean that Jian Yi has to go away now for his own safety and so he can learn how to defend himself properly. This has proven that Jian Yi is not as capable as He Tian is when push comes to shove. He Tian can hold his own for a bit against even multiple adults, but poor Jian Yi didn't stand a chance.
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Mrs. Jian thanks Zhan for always looking after Jian Yi, and it is a sweet moment, but I can't help but feel like this is her way of saying "thanks for everything, but he doesn't concern you anymore. Time for him to come home." Zhan is going to be devastated. They've been together since they were kids. I wonder if he joins the police force so he can better protect Jian Yi from his enemies? I wonder if Zhan being an officer will effect their relationship in the future, since Jian Yi is pretty much set to inherit the mafia kingdom. There's gonna be tension on what's right and wrong, I'm sure. I don't know if Zhan can accept darkness the way Mo can. Mo's life hasn't been kind, and he blames himself for the death of a man, so of course he can accept He Tian. But of Jian Yi returns to Zhan as a darker version of himself, I don't know how Zhan would handle the change. We all love Jian Yi because he is honorable and wishes to protect his loved ones no matter what. What if that will to protect becomes less honorable? What if Jian Yi is taught the same lesson He Tian is: that you have to give into the darkness if you are truly going to protect anyone. Jian Yi tried talking to She Li at first before he was beaten. He hasn't fallen into the darkness yet, but under Qiu and his father's tutelage, that could change. Being away from Zhan may change him too, since Zhan has always encouraged him to be soft around him, as we saw in this chapter. Jian Yi doesn't have to be a "tough man" around Zhan. I guess we'll see.
And speaking of falling into darkness ...
The TianShan Stuff:
Again, we see Mo and He Tian after the fight. Mo's just standing there watching He Tian get patched up and have pain killers injected into him because he's had his hand stabbed through and because he was punching the ever loving shit out of She Li. His hands must be pretty fucked up, and no doubt Mo is feeling MANY THINGS watching He Tian get bandaged.
Mo asking him where he's going after this was so touching to me. It's like he was anxious He Tian was going to run off again. Mo two chapters ago was running around like crazy trying to find him. They've been nearly inseparable ever since Mo was jumped by She Li, so I think He Tian suddenly being gone is a disturbing thought to Mo. Also, I think it's important to Mo that He Tian be taken care of at this moment.
I've seen a lot of people saying He Tian is so depressed this chapter because he knows he has to leave Mo soon, but I think it's so much more than that, if you can believe it. He Tian has basically given up his soul in that last chapter. He's admitted, by turning to his family for help, that he can't be independent the way he was dreaming he could be a few chapters ago.
In the hotel room while spooning Mo, he told him "I'm going to find a way to give you a good life." He had wanted to do that on his own, and even asked Mo what he could do to earn money. He Tian was dreaming that he was OUT. He could be with Mo and live an honest life. It didn't matter if he was rich or not. He has Mo, and that's all he'll ever need. But that's not the reality of his situation. In the hospital, He Tian told Mo he was wrong to think he could protect anyone with his own bare hands. Without his family's influence, money, and resources, He Tian cannot protect Mo from the cruelty of their world. Bad things happen to Mo all the time because he is a genuinely good person. He is a magnet that draws bad people because of how good he is, and He Tian knows he can't protect Mo properly from all these evils if he doesn't have any influence or power. Without the fear his family uses to intimidate their enemies, how would She Li ever leave Mo alone? Or the "other side", who probably framed Mo's dad for some heinous crime. Mo and his family will always be preyed upon unless they have someone big and mean to keep the evil at bay. He Tian has realized he has to give into the darkness, the thing he is terrified of, if he is to keep Mo safe. The darkness isn't just literal dark, but the actual mindset and actions he knows he has to partake in if he is going to make any improvements on Mo's life. The darkness in his room or in his nightmares reminds him of this oppressive feeling, of the look in his brother's eyes when he has just done something dark.
So He Tian isn't just dealing with being taken away from Mo and his two best friends, the only people he lights up around or is even remotely real with (he pretends to be something else to teachers and to other students), but he's also dealing with the fact that he has sold his soul to his father in order to protect Mo. Not to mention he's hurt and he's exhausted. He just lived through a crazy night where he ran back and forth from the hospital, once with Jian Yi on his back, and then fought a bunch of dudes. And he's just so tired and so sad, but HE'S TRYING TO KEEP IT TOGETHER. He keeps smiling at Mo, and when he catches Mo looking at him in concern he's quick to reassure Mo that the soup is delicious and he's a-okay
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and that just fucking BREAKS Mo.
He Tian has been very strong for Mo all this time, and I think Mo is just overwhelmed that He Tian fucking loves him this much, and then I think he has realized that he loves him too. I think they skipped over the "we're dating" business and cut straight to love. There is no other explanation for why Mo is just so suddenly compelled to grab He Tian and drag him to his room so he can have a moment of closeness and connection with him like they've never had before. Some people are saying this is their first official kiss, which confuses me because I thought they kissed after Mo was beaten up? But either way, He Tian initiated that one. This one was ALL MO, and you could just really feel that he wanted to express his love for He Tian there. He wanted He Tian to know that whatever was running through his head, they can deal with it together and Mo's going to be there for him the way He Tian was always there for Mo. And I think he did just want to kiss the hell out of He Tian, because OF COURSE HE DOES, THAT BOY JUST WENT TO WAR FOR HIM, AND HE WON!!
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I love how He Tian just waits and lets Mo do whatever he feels comfortable doing, and even though Mo is afraid and shaking because THERE'S NO GOING BACK NOW, YOU'RE GAY, MY MAN, he goes for it, because he just won't deny his feelings anymore, or He Tian's for that matter. It's all out in the open now. They've like, beared their souls to each other. It's crazy how madly in love they keep falling. In comparison to ZhanYi, which is a crazy slow burn but a profound sort of love grounded in friendship, TianShan is just 100% passion. It's just as profound a love, but look at where they've come in a short amount of time (in the world of the manuha, anyway!). In story, it's been what since they first met, a few months? And they've just done so much more physically than ZhanYi has. Maybe even emotionally, because these two are just all feelings all the time. They even have had arguments that were explosive. Their love is just so different and just turned up to 100 all the damn time, and I love it so much.
Mo explicitly showing He Tian he's going to be there for him and he loves him back is so heartbreaking when you remember he doesn't really know for certain He Tian is leaving yet. He thinks they're going to deal with He Tian's trauma from this together, but he still doesn't understand just how much He Tian has sacrificed to make sure Mo is protected. It's devastating that the moment Mo opens up fully, He Tian is going to be wrenched away.
I'm depressed just thinking of it. Ughhhh.
Anyway, those are my thoughts. I'm never going to recover from that kiss, and that was in fact A DANG KISS, AND EVERYONE KNOWS IT! FUCK CENSORSHIP.
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snekverse · 5 months
Note
more dante more dante fuel my obsession
dantes relationships with the others? :>>
Oooo good question :0
I'm gonna make this mystreet exclusive lol if you want mcd you're just gonna have to send another ask >:3c
Nova: much like in mcd, regards her almost like a little sister, although that's a relatively recent change. In high school, when he was much closer with Garroth and Laurance, he was way more focused on playing wingman for them, and as such tended to accidentally treat her more like some kind of prize. He's doing his best to make up for it now though <3
Aaron: sorry danron fans but these two do NOT interact, not in my heart (or my rewrite).. they don't have a huge amount in common, and before becoming close to Nova Aaron was a completely closed book, so there's no really reason for this two to really know each other. As such I think dante would have super neutral opinions about him
Garroth and Laurance: close friends, but not as close as they were in high school.. as teens they were quite the trio, but most people's focus was always on Garroth (rich) and Laurance (charming), and not usually on him. It definitely affected his view of himself, and after becoming friends with Travis and Aphmau he started to distance himself from the others.
Travis: literally best friends, inseparable, attached at the hip and have been since high school lol. So attached at the hip, in fact, that they are constantly pushing the boundaries of a platonic relationship, always hugging and cuddling, sharing beds and stealing a few kisses, all they need to make it official is the label lol. They won't though, because while they are EXTREMELY close there's no real romantic feelings between them
Zane: pretty bad opinion of him in hs, and he kept that same view well into adulthood until Nova finally insisted that Zane was a good guy at heart. Nothing changed between them immediately, but Dante did open up to the possibility of change. Now a days he's got a pretty neutral opinion of Zane, leaning towards good. He still things Zane's cold, but he does understand what Nova sees in him :)
Katelyn: really respected her as teens, but as they've gotten older he's found he has less tolerance for her. Her treatment of Travis grates on his nervous, and while he understands why she defends Nicole with her life he really wishes that didn't involve talking down to him
Lucinda: he's genuinely terrified by her lol. She's gorgeous and intelligent and powerful, and it intimidates him a lot. He respects her a lot for it, despite how nervous she makes him, and does his best to stay in her good graces
Nana: he didn't used to ever really pay attention to her, but lately she's been catching his eyes and he's developed a lil crush 👀 he's incredibly nervous about asking her out though, given his previous dating history and her proximity to Katelyn. He doesn't wanna risk repeating what happened with Nicole with Nana
Nicole: his first love, the two have had a very rocky on-again-off-again relationship throughout the latter parts of high school, college, and even early adulthood. They broke it off again early in s1 on somewhat negative terms, and he tries not to dwell on how much he misses her
Gene: looks up to him a lot, even though he knows perfectly well that Gene got up to some shady shit back in the day. Their mom was always busy trying to support them as kids, and their father dipped shortly after he was born, so he's always considered Gene the closest thing to a real parent he's ever had
Zenix and Sasha: he's friendly towards them, but to him they've always be Gene's friends rather than his own. He knows them pretty well however considering how frequently they were around growing up, and he's pretty proud of how the whole group has changed since school
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monstercampus · 6 months
Note
ellie... may I please know more about Chaos or the pixies? 🥺 pleaseeeee 🥺
of course my love!! <3 sorry it got so long ehe 👉👈
The pixies live in a pixie-specific dorm (which is basically a large birdhouse that Sheela and Huxley built) since they're all very close and tend to stick together as a pack. The ones you've met already are a group of six, but there's more pixies on campus if you know where to look. They aren't necessarily students, but aren't necessarily staff either; pixies tend to hole up wherever they fancy, and since they're quite rare and one of very few monster species that aren't governed by anyone but themselves, they're allowed to come and go as they please. Plus, they're considered to be good luck by most, so even their mischief is tolerated to a high degree since it's considered just part of their nature. They're usually pretty docile but since your arrival they've gotten.....more active than usual.
See, pixies have a long history with humans, but due to the current state of the monster-human world and the scarcity of the pixies themselves, they rarely if ever get to interact with humans like their ancestors did. It's one of the reasons that faeries, a sub-species of the pixie grouping, are so rare too nowadays--faeries are almost always born from a pixie-human union, so despite their long lifespans the race of faeries is slowly dying off. So the pixie girls on campus are eager to find ways to get close to you, partly because they're absolutely fascinated with humans...and partly because they'd like to recruit you, such a nice and pretty human, to make nice and pretty faerie babies that will revive their population! <3 Pixies are creatures of ecstasy though, and they can get easily distracted, so needless to say they might need a little time to get around to that while they're busy messing around with you and figuring out what you like. But lucky for you, pixie dust is a very potent aphrodisiac for humanoids--and lucky for them, they're small and sprightly enough to get under your clothes even while you're in the middle of class, just to give you a little pep boost for the day ♡
Chaos is a household curse and very well-known in myth, but very, very few have ever had the displeasure of meeting him in person and lived to tell about it. Chaos is one of the last and oldest titans known to both gods and man, imprisoned in The Pits in the deepest, darkest area of the Underworld for thousands upon thousands of years. Aside from being an immortal god whose actions are impossible to predict, Chaos was imprisoned for eternity for the crime of murdering the old gods who once ruled over the Holy and Unholy lands. Although many believe his treason was borne out of nothing more than a destructive, rageful urge and acted upon by impulse, scholars have uncovered many old tomes and ancient texts penned by godly scribes about Chaos' life as a free god; including the snatches of records that indicate that Chaos once had a lover and home he was wholly devoted to. Although the general public tends to prefer the simpler ideology of Chaos being an unpredictably evil god punished by the forces of good, it's been well-established in record that Chaos' story is much more...elaborate than that, and it roughly follows as such.
Eons prior to common memory Chaos once walked the earth as divinity in human form, freshly separated from his sibling Creation where they once were inseparable. Feeling a sense of dread and loneliness at walking the world alone that he helped shape, Chaos wandered until he stumbled upon a treasure in the sands of a beach; a pearl nestled safely inside a rugged oyster, perfectly shaped and smooth and cool to the touch. New to such a natural wonder and unable to resist the pull of a prize that had manifested without his or Creation's influence, Chaos claimed the pearl and carried it up the mountains he had made his home to the highest peak. There, he held out the polished treasure that he had kept so safe and warm to the sun, and with the radiance of the holy lands shining down a spirit sprung from the pearl! The glow of the holy lands spun that spirit into human form out of its light, and with the pearl nestled safely in the crest of their newly-beating heart, a new divinity entered the world; Eden, the first valkyrie of the gods and the first creation made from both earth, heaven, and underworld influence.
At first sight Chaos fell to his knees and wept, his loneliness forgotten, and he grew deeply infatuated upon the first touch of their hands as Eden helped him to his feet. The two were soon lovers and built a home for themselves, happy and content with their simple lives, until the old gods called Eden back to attend to their duties as a valkyrie. They were forced to fight the battles of the old gods and would return to their husband Chaos broken and exhausted, but never able to refuse the will of their deities who had given them life and love, and never without a smile on their face for him and him alone. Eventually the old gods demanded Eden's permanent return to the heavens and were stoutly refused, thus in petty retaliation they subdued Chaos and murdered his beloved spouse as punishment, stripping their immortality from them and casting their body into The Pits to suffer for the couple's shared act of defiance. And in a grievous rage, Chaos broke his shackles and rampaged through both the Holy Lands and the Underworld, slaughtering the old gods and each and every divinity that served them until he grew tired and slow from his injuries. In that moment of weakness the remaining deities cast him into The Pits to be sealed away forever and never return to the surface, destined to be bound by chains and tortured for all eternity as penance in a contract bound forevermore.
But as he wandered there, small and alone once again, he discovered a treasure--the pearl that once served as the heart of his beloved Eden, still warm but cracked and chipped from wear as it lay within their broken body. As the gates to The Pits closed for eternity, Chaos tearfully wrenched it from their breast, held his pearl aloft and begged one last time for mercy, not for him who would accept his suffering but for his paradise not yet lost. And just as his fate was sealed, the pearl was plucked from his hands and spirited far, far away from the Underworld; dropped into the vast ocean of the earth and sunk to the very bottom like a stone, Eden's restless spirit tugging at their shape to search vainly for their fallen husband. With time they settled in exhaustion, and for millennia they were left in the deep, dark coldness of the sea, the water and grit and current polishing them down, down, down until they became nothing but a handful of stardust glittering amongst the waves. And when time came, Creation returned to their side after rescuing them from death and scooped up what remained of Eden in their hands, lifted their palms to their lips, and blew that glittering stardust gently into a cloud that swirled and bound itself into a soul borne anew. With all but the smallest drop of immortal ichor remaining in their veins, Eden the valkyrie was rebirthed and given new life, all but that one drop and the same form they took remaining.
Some say that it was Creation's gift to their fallen brother who still endured endless torture in The Pits, growing larger century after century as his titan blood boils in rage and agony, his chains growing with him yet The Pits themselves eventually growing small in comparison to his enormity. Although close followers of Creation insist that their craft takes form regardless of any personal desire, as Creation itself is a god void of nearly all emotion. Either way, Eden supposedly walks the world in present day, void of memories of their past life and of their dear husband, of the life they once dreamed of and lived together in harmony. Some rumour that Chaos' eyes that were stolen long ago during his enchainment was to eliminate the possibility of him recognizing his newly-reincarnated spouse, for if he ever knew for certain that they live there would be no force that would keep him locked away a moment longer. But were they to be recovered and returned, if Eden themselves were to find their way back to the husband they never knew they lost, the world would undoubtedly witness the return of the most feared, most villainized god from myth and fairy tale alike, and would see firsthand the unbridled ecstasy and arrogance of Chaos claiming for good what he was willing to blight all existence for.
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pxrxcxa · 2 years
Text
Opposite Ends 
Chapter Ten - Doomed love
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C1 | C2 | C3 | C4 | C5 | C6 | C7 | C8 | C9 | C11 | C12 | C13 pt1 | C13 pt 2 |
Chapter Eleven is out now, enjoy Sunflowers x 🌻
Pairing | Eddie x Female reader 18+. Steve x Robin x Female reader platonic friendship
Series summary | Dustins older sister got brought into the group during the events of Starcourt mall, 3 months on she's in her senior year and the kids are starting high school. After everything that went down she feels that she has to keep them safe at all costs, that includes keeping them way from the charismatic 'freak' Eddie Munson that runs a club based on their favourite game. They've both hated each other since freshman year -with good reason-, but when keeping distance between the kids and Eddie means putting herself in the firing line, boundaries get blurred, intentions get lost & the heart speaks louder than the brain.
The story is told from both Y/N & Eddies point of view.
What to expect | Slow burn enemies to lovers, Angst - with a happy ending (fix-it-fic if you will), fluff & smut (in the later chapters). 18+ to read this story.
Series Warnings | Mentions of abuse, drug use, 18+ smut content
Chapter word count | 9 K Word Count
Chapter warnings | Nothing too out there in this chapter
As always, any & all comments/reblogs are most appreciated - Thankyou, P. x 🌿
Authors Note | Again thank you for your patience, and as always thank you for reading! I did have to split this chapter up because we had a 20 k + word count but that's great news because 11 will be out in a couple of days! On top of everything else I had some pretty serious writers block but Im back & better than ever - at least I think so, let me know what you all think!
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Eddie | March 1986
I didn’t walk around Hawkins with the intention of having my guard up all the time against almost everyone, it had just happened. When the entitled, judgemental residents of the town had taken one look at my ripped jeans, listened to the metal music blasting from my van and watched the fantasy game that my DnD club played that they deemed as ‘satanic’, and decided that I wasn’t worth more than the dirt beneath their shoes, it hadn’t exactly shaped me into a model citizen.  
But the feeling of being an outcast my entire life had sat fine with me; I had no interest in anyone in the small town I’d grown up in. They were all carbon copies of their parents, and their parents before them,  there wasn’t anyone worth being interested in. 
Until she came along. 
Henderson had strutted into my life like I didn’t have a choice, knocking down every single solid wall I’d spent years building up like they were made of feathers, even before she turned them into dust with each glance of her bright eyes and a hint of her sweet smile that she threw in my direction, she had been unconsciously destroying them with every death stare and exasperated sigh, breaking me down with every addictive movement of her.
She was meant for me, every hate filled eyeroll and love filled smile was ingrained on my soul in marks that would last a lifetime.
I’d never stood a chance. 
I never thought I would find myself completely and utterly consumed by another until I found her, or perhaps it was the other way around and she’d found – no saved - me. 
She’d taken my hand and led me out of the darkness of my own corruption and showed me that, whatever our souls are made of, however they were shaped from the loud, hurtful world around us… 
…hers and mine were the same, broken halves of the same blooming whole. 
I’d loved her from the moment I’d met her, I just hadn’t known it yet. 
And now I was never going to be able to tell her. 
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In the three months since running into her at the Hideout, when we had both been trying to drown our sorrows over each other, we’d spent almost every day inseparable from each other. There had been a regular post-school afternoon once at my trailer when I had almost told her I loved her, and then I had been dying to tell her every day since.
“You’re an idiot Eddie Munson.” She laughed, smacking her hands against my bare chest as I nestled into the crook of her neck, tickling her through the thin sheets twisted between us. 
“Unfortunately for you, I’m your idiot.” She wriggled under my arms as I found her sweet spot, making her beg for mercy as I rolled over and pulled her on top of me. The setting sun that shone through my bedroom window sparkled magnificently in her hair, bringing out vibrant colours that weren’t usually there. The glittering sunlight brightened around her silhouette as a light breeze ruffled the stray whispers of hair falling into her face, furthering my suspicion that she was an angle.   
As she laid naked, pressed against me, she certainly had the angelic look to pull it off. 
“And I am entirely okay with that.” Resting her chin forward on my chest so that I had to tuck mine to still stare into her eyes, she pouted attractively.   
“How did we get here?” I breathed into the warm air, my thoughts falling back to us in our first Calculus class at the beginning of my third and her first senior year. “I used to hate you; you know.” I couldn’t ever remember or even fathom myself feeling any type of way that wasn’t absolute reverence towards the perfect creature in my hands. 
“If I remember correctly Munson, the feeling was extremely mutual.” Her smile was wide and carefree, her body pressed into me in criminal ways as her frame shook with laughter. Everything about y/n healed my soul, and although my only vice was weed, I was no stranger to the occasional dangerous party drug, but even their temptations cowered in the hulking shadows of Y/n's etherealness. 
“College will still be there y’know?” I blurted out suddenly, tightening my arms around her as the thought of losing her punctured my chest painfully. 
“What do you mean?” Her brows furrowed in confusion cutely, I smoothed the creases with my thumb as I traced light patterns along her spine.
“Come with me.” I stated, a sense of peace flowing over me as I realised it to be the only thing I would truly ever want, I’d been a fool to think I could walk away from her now, only three months in and she already had me willing to stalk the ends of the earth for her, God knows what kind of state she’d have me in by the end of the school year. 
“Be serious.” She scoffed; her eyes searched my face for a glimmer of falseness. 
“I am. Everywhere. Travel. We’ll travel everywhere, and we’ll fuck in every state and take a photo of it! I don’t want to forget a single moment with you.” I pressed my lips against hers ferociously, pulling away when her moans became too distracting, refusing to let our conversation be derailed.
“Come with me… please. A year or two, it won’t make a difference.” I begged, letting my excitement flare on my face, not even contemplating the very real possibility of her saying no. 
“Okay.” She didn’t miss a beat, determination and excitement reflecting in her own features now as I pulled back, shocked.
“Really?” I laughed disbelievingly, doubting that I had earned the right kind of karma to have y/n in my life. 
“Don’t give me a chance to change my mind Edward.” She warned, rolling to the side as she slipped from my arms, pulling my Hellfire t-shirt over her loose hair. I bit my cheek as I watched her strut over to my desk, my shirt barely covering her perfect ass as she bent down to retrieve the bud stashed away in the top draw. 
“How are you real?” I asked, watching carefully as she sat back into my desk chair, rolling a fat joint for the both of us between her deft fingers, waiting for her perfect form to burst into a cloud of air. 
“Don’t I feel real?” She laughed.
“Incredibly.” I shot back, wiggling my brows suggestively.
“You are damn near perfection” I promised and laughed as she broke off into a giggle. 
“Near?” She gasped; feigning being hurt over my careless words. 
“Well until you’re in my arms again how can I ever be sure you’re real?” I held them back out for her expectantly, but she dropped the rolling paper as she gasped out in pain this time. I flew from the bed instantly, tearing the sheets out of my way as I stumbled in my haste to get to her. 
“Another one?” I murmured concerningly, watching her face contort as she pressed her fists into her temples. She’d been getting relentless headaches, their appearances increasing over the last few weeks. The only thing that seemed to help was when I played my guitar for her, I already had my hand outstretched towards my acoustic one when her nails traced the skin on my arm. 
“I’m okay, this one wasn’t too bad” She smiled, placing her warm, soft palm against my cheek before turning away to re roll the joint. Even though she’d touched me a thousand times, the feeling of her still shot hot, fiery needs of desire and nerves through me. 
I needed her, and not in a sexual or even romantic way, I needed y/n like I need air to breathe, she was the only one who had walked into my life where I hadn’t spent a second worrying that she was about to walk right back out of it. Even my uncle Wayne, I still had nights where I woke up in a panic that I would find he had abandoned me like the rest of my family, but the suffocating thought never crossed my mind with y/n. 
She was my rock in a raging storm, the safe embrace of warm sheets after a hard day, the only arms that brought me comfort when the hate from our peers bit down through my metal exterior just a little too deep. 
Y/n saw me for who I truly was, scars and all, and still thought I was worth something. 
The most powerful, knee buckling feeling of affection rushed through me, and without thinking I opened my mouth. 
“I lo-“ I coughed as her eyes swung up to me, her cheeks reddening as instantly as mine. 
“Stay?” I amended, hoping she could hear the weight and meaning behind the single word. 
She laughed, like she knew what I had started to say, but chickened out at the last second, not wanting to ruin the most perfect moment of my life. 
“Always.” Her smile dropped as she stared back intently at me, walking over to place my head between her hands so I couldn’t turn away from her, she pressed her delectable lips against mine softly, pulling back slowly to wipe the unlawful tear away that brimmed at the corner of my eye. 
“Always Edward.”
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But as y/n had put it, I’d been stupid enough to believe her. 
Those words, the entire night, every single moment shared between us had been ripped away from my rose-tinted glasses as my ring tumbled from her fingers onto the field, holding me rooted to the cold grass as she sloshed away from me and jumped into Jason Carvers truck. The painful sight had sent me spiralling after her once I figured out how to get my legs to work again, anger shot through me as I patted my jacket pockets for my keys as I sprinted across the field, finding them flat and empty. 
By the time I tore through the empty school corridors back into the drama room and found my discarded keys sitting on the tabletop, the parking lot was dark and empty, no trail of y/n or any of the basketball team. 
Even for my standard, I drove like a mad man to the nearest pay phone, smoothing out a crumpled piece of paper with y/n's loopy writing on it, Steve Harringtons number scribbled across the aged piece from her notebook.
“For emergency’s.” She’d smiled, slipping it into my glove box, at the time I had suspected her of just wanting Eddie the freak and Steve the hair Harrington to become friends, but whatever her reasoning, I was grateful for it now. 
Even when I’d fallen from the roof of my uncles trailer at the tender age of ten playing air guitar, snapping my arm in the process, that didn’t even come close on the emergency scale compared to y/n disappearing with Carver. 
The phone rang three times before someone picked it up. 
“Harrington.” I breathed. 
“Uh yeah…? Who’s this.” 
“It’s Eddie.” 
There was a loaded pause. 
“Eddie Munson.” I gritted through my teeth, as I lightly banged my fist against the glass backing of the payphone box. 
“Yeah. I got that, there’s only one Eddie Munson in Hawkins after all.”
I sighed heavily into the phone as unwanted thoughts of what Jason could be doing right that second consumed me. 
“What’s up?” Steve’s voice was cautious as he waited for my answer. 
“Y/n.” My voice dropped off as I stuttered over her name, cowering over the phone box as her words echoed in my mind. 
“Y/n? Is she okay? What’s wrong? Where is she?” His voice raised an annoying octave with each question. 
“She’s with Carver, she’s not safe, find her.” I slammed the receiver as I stumbled from the payphone, ripping my cigarettes from my pocket as I jogged towards my van. A long shadow crossed across my vision and the dimly lit carpark; I pulled my lighter away from my face as I squinted into the darkness.
Chrissy Cunningham had skipped out of the shadows next to the closed convenience store, she had her hands clutched together in front of her cheer skirt and her face gleamed from panicked sweat as she asked me in a hushed whisper despite that we were alone, the nearest soul probably a mile away, for something no ‘Good suburban girl” should even know about. 
I wasn’t proud of it and given the situation I’d landed myself right after I’d invited her to my trailer, it had been the worst decision of my life. 
But seeing her in her cheer uniform with her pom poms dangling by her side, an image of her holding hands with Jason in their matching Hawkins teams uniforms after the school pep rally this morning had flashed in my mind, and the urge to hurt Jason the same way he’d got to me, surged through me in a blinding, white, hot stab. 
Feeding hardcore drugs to his innocent, preppy girlfriend had seemed like the perfect start, and after Chrissy admitted that she followed me from the school to find some reprieve from 'loosing her mind', she had smiled cautiously, but still trustingly as I pulled open my passenger side door for her and slipped inside. 
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Y/N | March 1986
“If only we could just, like, combine.” Robin intertwined her fingers as she leant against the poster across from me, I was seated on the three-legged stool behind the counter, my knees pressed to my chest as I rested my chin on them, holding a wet bag of ice to my head.
“Combine?” Steve raised his eyebrows at her questioningly, sliding the last of the returned tapes back into their place on the shelves as he joined Robin. I had been put on checkout duty, though I’d mostly spent our shift at Family Video quietly withering away in the corner. There hadn’t been too many customers this morning considering it was a Saturday, and Robin saved me from most of them anyway, leaving me to revel in my pounding hangover and the sickening memories from yesterday that plagued me. 
Robin and Steve had both offered to cover for me at work, saying that it was okay if I needed to take some time for myself. They’d both shut their mouths when I’d glared at them, ripped Robins front door open and stormed past them towards Steve’s car, yelling out behind me that I would be in the back seat waiting to go to work. 
After what I’d seen last night, when I had torn myself from Max’s couch, tearing across the living room as I tried to escape, drunkenly beating on Steve’s chest when he tried to hold me back. I had begged him to take me away, with hot tears streaming down my frozen cheeks as I collapsed on the gritty carpet. Steve held me as I fell to pieces, the weight of everything baring down on me relentlessly. A nearby lamp post flickered unnervingly as Steve had draped his jacket over my slumped shoulders as he helped me walk back to his car, while I pointedly avoided looking across from Max's trailer, afraid of what I'd see.
I couldn’t stand to face any of the consequences of what happened yesterday, the excruciating headaches and tormenting visions that came with them, my choice to drink the pain away with the basketball team and what Jason attempted or seeing Eddie with Chrissy at his trailer. 
So when I woke up blearily in Robins bed this morning, with her and Steve watching me worriedly from the doorway, I had pretended that I couldn’t remember anything apart from ending things with Eddie on the field, quickly slipping between them towards the overtly pink bathroom as they tried to bombard me with inane questions, the steaming hot water that burned my skin hadn’t been enough to drown out their half-whispered fight behind the door as they argued over what they thought happened. 
Eddie owed me no loyalty after what I’d done; but I had never felt more gutted than when I realised he had meant a whole lot more to me than I to him, how easy it had been for him to move on with another warm body, how easily interchangeable I was for him when he had been irreplaceable to me. 
A whirlwind of emotions wrecked me. I felt devastated one moment and angry the next. My broken heart was coursing feelings of shame, doubt, confusion, and anxiety through me. 
But no words were grand enough to describe what I was really feeling when thoughts of him trickled into my mind, sending great whips of agony to lap at my raw skin as I buckled over on the tiled shower floor. 
I had ended things with Eddie and smashed both our hearts with my cruel words. They’d burned fiercer than the whiskey as they fell from my lips, each false word sending a new lash of pain across his face as we stood on the school field. I had almost gone back on my choice when he’d begged me to stay, the double subtext behind the word held it's on meaning between us. The true rawness of his pain crippled me, but the quick flash of the blazing headache that flickered behind my eyes had reminded me of what I’d seen in the school bathroom, and that my broken heart wasn’t anywhere near as important as Eddie, I needed him safe. It was better if he was heartbroken and alive, rather than the alternative he was guaranteed to succumb to if he continued to be a part of my cursed life. 
That knowledge hadn’t kept my heart from ripping itself apart inside of me though. 
I had to keep myself distracted, because if I stopped then I started to think about things; things like Chrissy walking up those steps, him inviting her into his trailer, opening the door for her like he’d done for me a hundred times. His hands tracing across her skin in the same patterns - 
I was going to scream. 
I slipped from my chair and started fiddling with a stack of receipts on the counter. I looked up as Robins heavy footsteps slapped against the floor as she ran past the register, her dark green work blazer flapping wildly as she spun around with a wide smile and snatched up a new tape.  
“Doctor Zhivago.” My gaze flickered over to Steve’s as he rolled his eyes and stood up straight from where he leaned against the wall.
“Ugh, you know I don’t do double VHS.” Despite my black mood, I grinned as he waved his hands in dismay at her choice for our morning movie. 
“But it’s about doomed love.” She held it up to her chest as her eyes puckered up in a puppy like state, I dropped mine to the tapes in my hands as my knees crumbled, her words sending an agonizing stab of invisible pain through me. 
“Oh well that’s relatable.” Steve mumbled as he grabbed the tape trolley.
“Precisely.” Robin smiled, clasping it tighter to her chest. 
I flattened myself against the counter as they both walked around it to join me, anger at their obliviousness surged through me as Robin continued to chatter aimlessly. I loved my only two, age-appropriate friends dearly, but their similar tactless ignorance was too much even for me at times.
“Also, Julie Christie is b-b-bonkers hot in this. Like seriously, the most beautiful creature I have ever seen in my life.” Steve rolled the trolly into the corner by our gumball machine as Robin snatched up the TV remote, I busied myself by drumming my fingers along the outdated computers keyboard as I waited for the monitor to roar to life. 
“We’re in the Forest Hills trailer park in east Roane County.” A deadly shiver shot down my spine and something evil enough to scare the devil churned in my mind as the words from the reporter crackled from the speakers. A strange mixture of knowing panic and relief settled in my chest as I turned to look at fuzzy screen with the others, like I’d been waiting for something terrible to happen and it had finally arrived. 
“We don’t have a lot of details now, but we can confirm that the body of a Hawkins High student was discovered early this morning. Police have not released the name..." 
I didn’t need the name. I knew, I’d always known. 
I had been too late, I’d been too selfish and given in to my basic human desires, it didn’t matter that it had been virtually impossible to stay away from Eddie, like there was something stronger than fate weaving our paths together, because now whatever brutal and fatal incident had happened at the trailer park, had pulled him into the cursed series of events that my friends and I were branded to never escape from. 
All because I wasn’t strong enough to stop loving a boy I wasn’t supposed to so that I could keep him safe. 
I gripped the side of the counter as blood rushed to my head, my body swayed dangerously as an ocean of blackness lapped at my consciousness, offering sanctuary as the glaring images from yesterday came to life before my eyes, the vision of Eddie’s lifeless body threatened to choke me as bile rose in my throat.
“Holy shit.” Steve moved closer into Robin as her eyes darted across the screen in shock, watching the older, dark-haired report deliver the news that was about to smash my world apart. 
“Max…” She whispered, shame pulsed through me that her name had not been the first one I’d panicked and worried over, a double shot of frenzied terror shot through our group as I pictured sweet, passionate, fiery Max taking Eddie’s place in my mind, her luminous pale skin turning a sickly white in death. 
The TV distorted in my vision as the blackness fought my last remaining feeble strings of hope, winning out as my knees collapsed onto the bristly carpet beneath us. 
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Eddie | March 1986 
A trucks horn blared out as I dashed across the cracked road into the thick bush on the other side. My hair tangled with leaves and broken branches stung my eyes as my legs hammered into the uneven ground faster than they ever had before as I tore deeper and deeper into the woods. I hadn’t stopped running for hours, no straight thought in my mind except to run away from that. 
I crouched down and curled over my knees against a flaky tree trunk to catch my breath as the heady silence of the trees pounded down on my eardrums, sweat dripping down my brow mixed with my tears and stung my eyes. I buried my head into my balled up fists until I was pressing hard enough on my eyes that I saw distorted shapes behind my darkened lids as I tried to shove away the images flashing though my mind like a horror movie. 
It wasn’t enough. 
The shapes soon turned into thin, pale snapped limbs; a sickening cracking echoed around the empty woods as hysterical sobs wracked my chest. I pulled at my hair frantically, trying to drown out the mental pain with physical. I flinched as a flock of birds soared over the canopy of green leaves above me, I turned to side as I fell forward on my hands, sharp rocks and stick scratching into my palms as I heaved, my loose hair fell around my face in curls as I breathed through my mouth. The rich smell of the damp earth invaded my mind as I bunched up my hands, watching the dirt squeeze through my fingers as I tried to ground myself, shivering as a light wet mist started to fall, unable to escape the past twenty-four hours that had been torturous and downright unbelievable. 
I was in hell. 
I had to be, there wasn’t any sane reason for what I had seen. 
Unless I was crazy, maybe everyone that had ever call me freak was right, maybe I’d imagined it. 
As the image of Chrissy’s shaking body slowly rising into the air, snapping into gruesome angles under an invisible force played over in my mind, I leant forward to press my face into the coolness of the ground beneath me. I’d been pretty great at creating fake scenarios for my clubs DnD campaigns, but the sounds of her bones cracking and the bloodied empty sockets where her eyes should have been, was beyond anything I was capable of conjuring up. 
Comically – given my current situation and what happened with her yesterday –my thoughts flashed to y/n, my panic and worry for her was stronger than for myself right now, pathetically ironic since she had made it clear that I was nothing, that I meant nothing to her. I clenched my eyes shut and pressed my dirty palms to my forehead as tried to keep the images of her at bay, I’d rather face what happened in my trailer last night again then think about what she said, and how she’d looked at me on the field.  
It would have been easier to.
I still couldn’t help but wonder if Steve had taken me seriously, he wasn’t my biggest fan but the previously douche jock did seem to be a genuine friend to y/n and I hoped he’d heard the panic in my voice and had enough sense after my phone call to track her down and make sure she was okay. 
Even if what she had said to me, as her words tore me apart, was true, and there was no real feelings behind her actions the last couple of months towards me – my heart and eyes squeezed together as a wave of pain washed over me – that didn’t mean that there was anything but genuineness in my own behaviour, I had opened and bared my soul to y/n in a way no one else alive had ever seen. 
I still cared about her. 
I probably always would. 
No matter what reasons lingered behind her cruel words to me, I wasn’t going to let her go off drinking with the guy that she had told me tried to attack her months earlier. 
Or maybe I just didn’t know her as well as she knew me, I wondered what she would think when she saw the news this morning, would she instantly believe and know that I wasn’t the one who hurt Chrissy?
Would she even care?
And it was that thought that kept me running, because if I couldn’t even believe it why the hell would anyone else? As far as the narrow minded, straight path Hawkins residents were concerned, I was a satanic, devil worshipping, trailer trash, no good teenager and our High schools ‘It Girl’ was dead, crumpled gruesomely on my trailers living room floor. 
Something clattered to my left, I sprung up and slammed into the tree as I shuffled back on my hands, my chest heaving as I stared at the rodent sniffing around for food in the grass a few paces from me. The terrified scream locked in my throat as its' confused, beady eyes met my scared ones, died as I realised it was just a wild animal and not a vigilante group hell bent on finding me. 
I leapt up and took off again as distant horns hooted angrily in rapid succession from the main road, sending myself flying further into the disorientating clutches of the forest as my jacket flew out behind me in the whipping wind. 
My feet that shuffled uncertainly first in one direction, sped up with purpose as the reflective surface of Lovers Lake glinted in the far-off distance. 
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Y/N | March 1986 
Déjà vu hit me like a tonne of rocks as I sat against the back wall behind the counter on the grainy floor, the red-tinged luminous Family Video sign flickered above me. I sat with my legs pressing into the rough carpet beneath me as Robin rubbed my back and asked me if I was going to hurl, her voice sounded thick and far away as she turned to where Steve leaned against the counter still watching the news as her palm rubbed warm circles into my skin. As I breathed through my mouth to ease the nausea, I wondered if monstrous events were going to become an annual occurrence for me, but I guess it didn’t matter. 
Because I didn’t think I’d survive this one. 
Not if it involved Eddie. 
Robin’s head snapped up, but I hung mine further into my hands as the store’s bell rung out loudly, the new arrivals slammed both doors open against the walls with a surrounding bang. 
“Hey Steve!” I looked up at Dustin’s voice from the front of the store, dread coursing through me at the expressions on his and Max’s face. She had an open flannel over the navy sweater I’d seen her in last night and her wild red hair thrown up in a loose ponytail, Dustin was dressed similarly but just on the opposite colour spectrum, sporting his ironic blue and white ‘thinking cap’. I hurried to my feet as Max’s eyes landed on me, guilt plastering her face as she tried to avoid my stare. 
“You guys seen this?” Steve shuffled uncomfortably as Robin moved to sit on the stool behind the counter as they both looked at Max in relief, neither of them voicing their solace in seeing that she wasn’t the unnamed dead student. 
Self-reproach wracked me as the same comfort did not fill me, my eyes only on my brother and my thoughts on the man we both cared for too much about as Dustin spied me behind the counter. 
“Y/n.” He gulped, his eyes flashing over my dark under eyes from crying all night; sleep had been well missed stranger to me for a while now.  
“Do you know where Eddie is?” I dug my nails into my palms hard enough to draw blood, my worst fears coming to light. I couldn’t speak as I opened and closed my mouth several more times, no sound except a gutted gasp escaping from it as my eyes flew to Max’s. 
I shook my head as I began to shake, waiting for the crushing blow I was sure he was about to deliver to me. 
“Come on y/n, you have to have some idea of where he is.” My voice failed me as my lips mouthed around the word no, Dustin snapped his head away in annoyance and turned back to Steve. 
“How many phones do you have?” He pleaded, laying his hands flat against the counter as he hunched over it, I looked between the two freshmen as an air of urgency and fear filled the air around us. 
“Someone was murdered.” Steve ignored him, pointing at the tv that had the images of a crime scene flashing across it, I squeezed my eyes shut as I recognised the background. 
“How many phones do you have.” He drawled out, his voice raising louder with each word as Max fiddled impatiently beside him. Steve’s head swung around to lock eyes with me over his strange request, confusion reflected in my gaze as well. 
What did this have to do with Eddie?  
“Uh two. Why?” His brow furrowed as he turned back to them, with slow movements I walked to stand behind Steve, watching erratic thoughts spin in Dustin’s eyes. 
“Technically three if you count Keith’s in the back.” Robin piqued up, jamming her thumb over her shoulder as she pointed to our managers office behind us. 
The others shared a confirming glance between them. “Yeah three works.” Max turned to Dustin, nodding ferociously as he slid his bulky backpack from his shoulders. 
“What are you doing?” Steve asked apprehensively as I tensed, Dustin slammed the bag down on the counter. 
“What are you-“ Steve yelled as he slid his bag across the tabletop and onto the ground below it. 
“My pile!” Robin jumped up from her chair and slammed into me as my brother launched himself onto the counter. 
“No no no! My tapes! Dude.” Steve grabbed his hair as Dustin’s feet swept the pile of movies into a loud clattering mess as he scrambled towards the computer. 
“What are you doing man?” Steve whined, throwing his hands up angrily in the air. Max snuck around the corner of the square counter to join him as he plopped down in front of the computer, rapidly firing away as his fingers stroked the keys at lightning speed. 
“Setting up base of operations here.” Robin peeked up at the screen as he typed madly away, absentmindedly handing me one of the scattered tapes as we both bent down to pick them up. 
“Base of operations?” Robin repeated, shooting Dustin a quizzical look. 
“Stop. Get off of that.” Steve tried to usher Dustin from the seat as Max stared over his shoulder intently at the names scrawling across the screen.
“No I need it.” He shot back, flexing his fingers in irritation.  
“Need it for what?” Steve grumbled, sounding awfully like a tired parent. 
“Looking up Eddie’s friends phone numbers.” He explained, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. My neck snapped up from the pile of tapes I had stacked in my hands, slamming them down on the counter at Eddie’s name. 
“Oh Eddie your new best friend because he’s so much cooler than me.” Steve replied immaturely. 
“Ehhh yes.” Dustin swung his head around on his shoulders in frustration at Steve’s childish antics. “I never said that.” He exclaimed. 
“Dustin.” I whispered, but my voice got lost as the store phone rung in a loud shrill. 
“Seriously you guys maybe on a Monday you can play around in here like toddlers, but it’s Saturday. It’s our busiest day.” Robin slammed her own pile down next to mine as she bent up to pick up a sign that Dustin had kicked off the counter. 
“Dustin.” I tried again, turmoil boiling within me as my mind ran rampant, Eddie’s face contorted in different types of pain burned behind my eyelids. 
“Look Robin, I totally empathise but this cannot wait until Monday.” He spun back in the chair as he ripped a notebook from his pocket, frantically scribbling down something as he stared as the computer screen.
“Oh my God.” Steve mumbled, rubbing his face as he bent down to pick up more stuff scattered on the floor. 
“What, because calling all of Eddie’s friends is an emergency?” Robin shot back. 
“Correct.” Dustin yelled. Max turned to look at me as she felt me move behind her. 
“You want me to strangle him? Or do you wanna do it?” Steve offered to Robin as he helped her return things to their rightful place. 
“We could take turns.” She smirked. 
“Dustin!” I yelled, slamming my hand down next to Max and making her jump. 
I knew something was seriously wrong when my brother refused to meet my eyes, his brows puckered as he dropped the notebook in front of him and pointed his pencil over his shoulders at us. 
“Can you just fill them in while I do this?” He aimed his words at Max, so I turned to her expectantly, so did Robin and Steve. A rage filed scream filed my throat as her stare met mine, pity and sorrow reflected in her blue eyes as her lips quivered, hesitating on the edge of words that were about cut through me like a rusty, serrated knife. 
“Fill us in on what?” Robin questioned, her gaze flicking between our faces as dread filled mine and guilt clouded Max’s. 
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Eddie | March 1986
I sped past the front door of the house nestled by the glistening blue water, the darkened windows and dusty front porch giving off an air of neglect and headed straight for the boat house hidden down the back of Reefer Ricks property, I swung my head to the sides as I sprinted down the uneven slope.
Even out here, miles away from the nearest suburban household, I felt like there were eyes on me. I slammed my hands against the white sheet metal of the unlocked door, barrelling through it and spinning back to slam it shut. 
My breathing was heavy as I rushed to the grimy window, gripping the sides as my bulky rings strained against my skin painfully, I peeked through the smears of dirt and dust into the empty surrounding woods, the blaring sunlight filtered down through new spring trees, shining far too much exposure onto my scarcely hidden position for my liking. I slumped over the windowsill as my breathing slowed, clutching at the stich in my side. The small boat suspended in air over the hole in the middle of the floor that dropped off into the lake, held by four chains attached to each corner, creaked eerily as a cool breeze flowed in from the still water outside, the reflection of its' depths danced across the walls in a dizzying pattern. 
A pungent off smell surround the boat house from the life jackets and fishing gear hung up around the walls, I swept my hands across the rough wooden benches that lined the far wall across from me as my stomach rumbled, pushing piles of crap and junk onto the floor carelessly as I searched for some kind of weapon. 
Something. 
Anything. 
I scoffed to myself as I pulled a warm pack of beer from beside the turned off old fridge in the corner, out of date snack bars layered in dust, packed behind it. 
Yeah, it’ll have to do. 
The glass bottle slipped through my fingers and split into a thousand shards as something screed behind me, I flung around and fell back against the grainy wood bench, swinging my head wildly towards to source until I spotted the Bald Eagle soaring over the reflective blue water as it dived, it’s wings spread wide as it dipped and flew in spectacular patterns. I walked over slowly to the edge of the open window, my thoughts moving to my Uncle Wayne. 
They were his favourite birds; he’d always come home with a new random fact about them, his face bright with excitement as he shoved his favourite nature book under my nose as we sat at our dingy dinner table eating a five-star microwaved meal. 
“You know kid, they mostly eat fish?” 
“Really?”
“Yeah, follow a Bald Eagle and you’ll never go hungry.”
I coughed as a desperate sob racked my body, bending over to grab my knees as my heart clenched for my Uncle, wishing he was here with me now, torn between not wanting to be alone in this mess but praying to a God I definitely didn’t believe in or at least, - didn’t have a good relationship with – that divine fate had intervened, and my uncle didn’t return home this morning from his shift to find what drove me out last night. My hands trembled as panic consumed me, imagining what he must have thought when he found the bloody, crumpled mess that used to be Chrissy. 
Would he think it was me? No, he knew me better than almost everyone. He must have called the cops by now; he had to be worried about me. Once my name was dragged into this there would be hell to pay, a fury of uniform clad search parties out for my head. 
I wondered if there’d be anyone on the opposite side of that, out looking to help me. My uncle definitely, My Hellfire club maybe. Though I couldn’t imagine anyone or anything able to stop whatever did that to Chrissy. 
My thoughts flashed to Henderson as I watched the Eagle soar low over water’s edge, disappearing into the orange horizon as the sun quickly set. Jealously floored me as I wished for my own pair of strong wings to fly me away from this mess. 
Like a rabid animal, I shot up and dived under the damp blue tarp covering the rusty boat, rapidly spreading it over me to cover my sneakers as the far-off sound of tires spinning over gravel made its way towards the boathouse.
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Y/N | March 1986
“Have you seen or heard from Eddie recently?” Dustin paced back and forth in front of me as he pressed the phone harder into his ear. The world around me passed in a blur as my thoughts consumed me. 
Chrissy Cunningham dead in Eddie’s trailer. 
Eddie missing or worse. 
I had nearly torn poor Max’s arms off as I gripped her shoulders, leveling my face with hers as I made her repeat what she said, she had to tell me three times that she had seen him leave – alive – before I collapsed back against the stool behind the counter in relief. 
Steve, Robin and I had all stood wordless as a cold tremor ran though the three of us as Max spoke about the electrical problems at the trailer park and what her and Dustin thought that meant. 
I didn’t think that I would ever feel relieved to hear that the upside down and the monsters within it were wracking havoc on Hawkins in again, but relief flowed through me that they thought and agreed that it had to be something supernatural because there was no way Eddie had hurt Chrissy. 
Alive but on the run. Thing could be a lot worse. I bit at my raw nails beds, my ringers tracing the ghost of Eddie’s ring that no longer sat on my finger as I impatiently sat and listened to the three phone calls happening around me, I had been dismissed from my list of names to ring, Robin gently tugging the phone from my hand with a small, pitiful smile as I shook like a leaf in the wind. 
“Eddie Munson.” Max sped past me in the other direction to Dustin.
“When was the last time you talked to him?” Dustin sighed and crossed another long shot name off the short list.
“Yeah have you seen him?” Max quipped. 
“Okay, sorry to bother you” Dustin slammed his receiver down and reached for another number. 
“Know anyone who’d know where he is?” Max groaned, her eyes snapping up to meet mine as I fiddled and leaned in closer to hear the irritated voice on the other line.  
“I reallyyy don’t think he’s at the arcade.” Robin grabbed the phone dial and held it to her chest, walking over to the other side of the counter. “Yep, I’m pretty sure.” I sighed and pressed my lips together as she looked up at me in disappointment. 
“Reefer Rick? No. Does this Reefer Rick have a last name? I mean, it’s kind of…” Max jogged over to the blank notebook in front of the register, waving her hand around as she tried to drag the information out from the person on the other end of the call. 
“Doctor Zhivago.” Steve strutted past me on the other side of the counter as he weaved his way through the isles of stacked movie, the double VHS tape held up in his hand as he smirked as the customer – she was what both he and Robin would have described as a ‘babe’. I huffed and slipped from the chair, ignoring his antics as I watched Max scribble something down madly, peeking over her shoulder to make out her messy handwriting.  
She slammed the phone down and turned to the me watching her with a hopeful expression. “Hey guys, I might have a lead.” 
“Seriously?” Dustin spun around with a keen grin as Robin hung up mid conversation. 
“Yeah. Apparently Eddie gets his drugs from some guy named Reefer Rick. And sometimes Eddie crashes there.” Max’s face scrunched up over the name as she shook her head. 
Uh oh. 
Ricks place out by Lovers Lake, sat in the middle of nowhere surround by thick tufts of trees. 
Perfect place to hide. 
Panic and frustration shot through me that I hadn’t thought of Eddie’s supplier myself, while I listened to the group try and figure out where to find him. 
“That sounds promising. Where does this Reefer Rick guy live?” Robin 
“See that’s the thing, no one knows. He’s more of a legend than someone that people actually know.” Max shrugged her shoulders as she acknowledged how ridiculous it sounded. Guilt pulsed through me as I considered letting them figure it out the hard way, saving me the grace of not admitting my habit to Dustin, not that I’d been keeping life together well recently, but I still wanted to be a good older sibling example to him. 
No, Eddie’s safety was more important than my bruised ego taking a hit to my questionable-to-begin-with reputation, and with the man hunt that was already brewing from the news that there was a high school student murdered, every second was crucial. 
“What about a last name?” Dustin suggested. 
“I don’t know that either.” Our heads flung to the front of the store as Steve cut Max off.  
“Bet the cops know the last name.” He was loading more tapes into the trolley, mumbling away from us as he pointedly tried to ignore my outraged face, his vest swayed like a red flag as his back made for a nice, large target for the tape I’d subconsciously picked up. 
“The cops? Really Steve that’s your suggestion?” Dustin spat, a similar expression of disgust and anger reflected on his face. 
I needed to speak up now. 
“We don’t need the cops. I know where Reefer Rick lives.” The older friends of the group shot me knowing and disappointed looks as Dustin scrunched up his face at me. Steve slammed the last of the tapes down and spun around towards the counter. 
“How the hell do you-“ I cut Dustin off before he started on his tangent. 
“That doesn’t matter right now.” I waved him off, turning my attention to Steve as I slid closer next to him to join him at the counter, placing my own arms on the tabletop, forcing him to look at me. My body was like an electrified live wire, burning at the touch as each wasted second that ticked away put my teeth on edge. 
“We need to find Eddie before the cops do, and every moment counts right now.” I forced myself to hold back the anger in my voice, we couldn’t afford to fight between ourselves right now, Steve didn’t know Eddie like I did – not that he’d given him much of a chance – but if what happened at his trailer had anything to do with the upside down, then we needed to stick together, I needed his help, my friends help, to save Eddie.
And myself, if I was honest. 
Because if Eddie didn’t escape from the evil supernatural forces of the upside down or the inevitable witch hunt by Hawkins residents, then I had no intention to either. 
The only way we were going to be able to fight this was together, like we always had. 
“I just think that they should be filled in on what we know, what’s going in.” He shrugged, turning to face me as my expression pleaded with him, his own conveying his urgency for me to understand his point.  
“You think Eddie’s guilty, don’t you?” Dustin snapped, my younger brother grew fiercer than even myself for a moment as Steve tore his stare away from mine and leaned on the counter towards him, an apologetic look on his sharp features as he shrugged again. Dustin crossed his arms and raised his brows at him as I placed my hand over his, clenching down harshly on his fingers. 
“Steve, you and I have been through things that we can’t even bare to speak about. Look me in the eyes and tell me you don’t trust me. I know Eddie, better than anyone else ever will. He didn’t do this. We need to go find him and save him from whatever did.” Dustin swiped his bag back onto his shoulders as he shoved Max and Robin towards the exit, mumbling for them to move faster. 
I turned away to catch the door as it swung back closed after them, pausing as I noticed Steve still hadn’t moved, his eyes glued to his hands as he clenched them together. 
My thin patience snapped as I watched a police patrol car speed past with its siren blaring as its lights reflected off the store front’s windows. 
“You’re coming, or so help me I will put hair removal in your shampoo until you go bald.”  
Chapter Eleven
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feathersandblue · 11 months
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Deep breath.
Very, very deep breath.
After all I'd read about the ending of ROTE, I'm surprised to realize that I ... well, I like it.
I find it consistent with the series. Even thought the parasites still don't make a lot of sense to me, even though I would have taken an ending of happily-growing-old-in-Withywoods anytime, I think that the actual ending fits the books and treats the characters with respect.
It makes sense to me, in a pretty twisted sense, how Bee explains Fitz's ambiguity toward the Fool: That he couldn't love the Fool the way the Fool wanted to, which, when the Fool left, led him to believe that the Fool's love for him was not unconditional after all, not sincere and strong enough for the Fool to stick around and play second fiddle while Fitz pursued a life with Molly. The Fool leaving really reinforced the idea that it had only been about "bedding" in the first place.
"The love I give you is obviously not enough, or you would stick around. If you really loved me, wouldn't you be content with what I can give you, and stay?"
Which, fair enough.
Let's be honest here. No, the Fool would not have been content to play second fiddle to Molly. He may have been chill about the bedding part, but he's made it very clear that it was about having Fitz's heart. Which translates to coming first in his affections, not second. And at the ending of Fool's Fate, with Fitz's love for Molly reawakened, Fitz was most definitely not inclined or capable of giving the Fool that. He'd made it clear that he wanted go back to Molly. And even if he'd gone with the Fool, he would have done so only with tremenduous regrets. At the end of Fool's Fate, his love for Molly was inseparable from his longing for a home and the quiet life, and that kind of longing would have tinted (and tainted) his relationship with the Fool and fostered quiet resentment.
So, yes, the Fool went on his not-so-merry way because what Fitz could have given him would not have been enough.
Fitz is right in that.
Only that it's not that simple.
Because it's Fitz who establishes boundaries and puts a firm limit to the love the Fool is allowed to show him. He makes that perfectly clear during their Quarrel. And even after they've reconciled, these boundaries stay in place, reflected in the writing where he refuses to ever acknowledge what the Fool truly feels for him.
He pretty much puts the Fool in the closet.
Ever since The Quarrel, I've been frustrated as a reader with Fitz's obliviousness resp. dismissiveness of the Fool's feelings, the fact that Fitz is so uncomfortable and embarrassed whenever the Fool's true feelings are revealed, the fact that any sort of closeness between them can only happen where others don't see. Fitzs' internal monologue is a constant litany of "no homo". Over and over, it's reinforded that he loves the Fool but not that way, that the Fool is a friend but only a friend, he loves him like no one else but not in an untoward way, and so on. He refuses to consider anything else, to the point where it starts reeking of erasure.
What's more, there's not even the kind of idle curiosity or speculation that I would expect from someone who finds out their best friend is in love with them.
There are so many places in the books where the Fool's love and longing for Fitz is made explicit, but Fitz never reflects them. In all other things, Fitz does reflect at least occasionally. He's an unreliable narrator, sure. He can be oblivious, sure. But not to that degree.
So, there are certain ways in which the Fool is allowed to love Fitz and other ways in which he most decidedly isn't. The Fool has to hide, he has to hold back, his love is welcome only where it takes a shape that Fitz can accept.
And with these boundaries firmly in place, established by Fitz, he is then affronted when the Fool distances himself from him?
When you friendzone someone who is desperately in love with you, you can't actually expect them to stick around and watch you be exuberantly in love with someone else. It simply isn't fair. And that's what Fitz completely fails to acknowledge in his thoughts. His fear of abandonement makes him selfish.
I think the Farseer and The Tawny Man trilogy pretty much reflect the general mindset toward homosexuality that was common during the 90s and early 2000s, where you were allowed to be gay but you had to be defensive about it. So the romantic or sexual aspects of the Fool's love for Fitz are treated as an imposition, and Fitz is magnanimous and kind for ignoring them, and oh, what a hero he is that he can comfort his male friend by holding him at night while he recovers from torture.
Fitz and the Fool was written a couple of years later, yet the erasure continues. It's very, "don't ask, don't tell", and at no point do the Fool's feelings ever warrant real consideration. For Fitz, it's all about how he feels, that he was hurt by the Fool's absence, that he doesn't know whether he can trust him, that it never occurs to him that the Fool stepped back to let him have his life with Molly and their family, while the Fool got ... nothing and then worse.
I'm not happy with the continuation of the "no homo".
At the same time, the boundaries blur, to the point where touch becomes more common between them, where Fitz becomes more comfortable with the way the Fool does gender. It's interesting how it's constantly mentioned where they are in relation to each other, how often they share the same space. The emphasis Hobb puts on their non-sexual intimacy, on their relationship, in every single scene, feels like it should go somewhere, and in a way, it does as they ultimately merge into the stone wolf with Nighteyes.
The thing is, I can't really be disappointed because I think that Hobb has written the story she wanted to tell and told it well. I have to respect that. If Fitz is a zero on the Kinsey Scale, then he's a zero. I guess it's all moot now as you leave the physical behind when you turn into a stone dragon.
I just wonder why someone would put so much emphasis on writing a queer relationship as absolutely central to the plot - to the point where the series titles reflect that - yet work so hard on creating and upholding a line the characters are not allowed to cross.
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stephiethewephie · 4 months
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Piper’s Relationship With Each Character: Part 1
Time to show what Piper's relationship is to each character! Who is she good friends with, who not good friends with, and WHO IS SHE IN LOVE WITH (spoilers: she’s probably not going to have a love interest because of how I want her story to go, but I may change my mind)? First off, Ramshackle and Heartslabyul Part 2, Part 3, Part 4
Grim:
"Silly ole cat," Piper likes to call him. Gave her quite a scare at the opening ceremony. But, with her unfortunately kind heart, she decided to let him stay with her. Influenced by her tough relationship to her cat back home, Edward, she didn't really get along with him at first. She also found it hard to have him listen to her and work with him in battle because of her inexperience and his incompetence.
But as the days went on, they both learned to trust each other more. Pretty much becoming inseparable to the point which they feel lost without each other.
Riddle:
Also someone who she didn't get along with at first. Much to her efforts to try and get along with him and not make him angry while addressing the issue of his rule subtly. Which failed... miserably. Piper also felt a sting when Riddle called her an idiot child (which she was unfortunately used to because of classmates in her own world).
But, after his overblot and during the events of book 2, Riddle was able to open up to Piper and find a source of comfort and support in her. And she showed forgiveness and compassion towards him. He invites her to tea and study with the other boys sometimes which Piper never refuses. Especially if sweets are on the table!
Ace:
The one who laughed at her and Grim the first day of school... Oh, bother... yeah did not really get along at first either. Though Piper barely had any control of their first encounter, so there's that as well. And bless her kind heart for letting Ace stay with her when he was collared.
Ace did give her a lot of props when they defeated the monster at the dwarf's cottage though. And the fact that he punched Riddle in the face after he called her an idiot definitely caught her off guard. No one really stood up for her like that since she came to their world, if not ever in her life. So, that really signified her relationship with him. She teased him a bit about him caring for her that much afterwards.
Though she never sensed that they were friends until the end of Book 4 where Ace and Deuce came to save her and Grim and they basically had to scream, "WE ARE FRIENDS," to her. They've been besties ever since.
He’s a bit of a bad influence on Piper, making her more rebellious and a bit of a prankster. But, most of all, he let her be her adventurous self. Something that she hasn't shown anyone in a long time.
Deuce:
FINALLY someone she got along with from the start. Well, the entrance ceremony did leave them at a rough start (which I will explain more later when we get into her backstory). However, they quickly made up afterwards. He was the first (and really only one) to ask her, "are you ok?"
She admires his efforts to become better than he was when he was little, for she believes everyone has the ability to be good and change their ways. Again, she never sensed that they were friends until the end of Book 4 where Ace and Deuce had to scream, "WE ARE FRIENDS," to her.
But, even before that, she had a strong bond with Deuce. They both seem to compliment each other. Deuce receives tutoring from Piper when he is struggling in class (aka. all the time), and Piper receives lessons from Deuce about how to be more confident and stand up for herself. While they are all very close friends, Piper may be closer to Deuce than Ace.
Trey:
Another person she got along with relatively easily. After all of the chaos everyone else throws at her, it's nice to have someone as calm as Trey around if she ever needs a break. While she was a little upset when he originally did not confront Riddle about this behavior, she understands why he didn't. She certainly is not good with confrontation unless it's killing them with kindness. Though she knows there is more than that when it comes to Trey.
Besides, who could be upset at someone who makes delicious sweets. She could eat them all day if she could. She even helps him with baking sometimes for special events. When she is homesick, Trey makes her honey cakes! Besides her mother's, they are the best she's ever eaten!
Cater:
Was also pretty chill and got along with Piper relatively easy. She helps him with his tasks sometimes and likes to take pictures with him for Magicam. She has never used social media platforms in her world, so Cater taught her how the algorithm works and got her a nice little following (she mostly posts pictures of her stuffed animals in the woods or anywhere in nature. Became an aesthetic real quick). He also taught her how to take good photos with the ghost camera.
However, she's a bit worried about him. She's one of the only people that can see through his facade. But, when trying to talk to him about it, he just changes the subject. So, she figured to just bring it up subtly such as making spicy ramen or offering to go skateboarding (which she is not good at but will try for him).
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hajihiko · 2 years
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i love platonic or siblings kuzupeko!! do you have any thoughts on what their post-game reunion might be like or how they would interact with each other afterwards?
Oh my gosh yes hang on
first things first the pre-and-during game
Okay so. My opinion, and something I think the characters might realize themselves, is that Fuyuhiko and Peko love each other very much and good god do they need some time apart.
They almost literally can't live without one another! They've never had to, since they've always been inseparable, and probably never found a reason to either until NWP.
Shit we already know but it's my words on it:
Peko, as I understand it, doesn't want to be apart ever- or at least she thinks they shouldn't be, specifically she should never be far from Fuyu because it's her duty and life purpose to protect him. I'm guessing Fuyuhiko telling her to act as if they're classmates and nothing more is halfway to avoid attention and keep things low, but maybe mostly to give them a chance to be their own people separate from each other. Because he knows their relationship as it is is unhealthy and he WANTS them to be actual friends, but boy literally cannot express how he feels unless it's a life and death thing, so "do it for the mission" it is.
So that's one layer of being overly involved, that Fuyuhiko tries to shake.....at first.
Then the Murder happens, and omg listening to the audio for the trial is so frustrating and also emotional. They're both 100% ready to die and kill so the other is safe (except, in the end, Fuyuhiko can't commit to it). So very very protective of each other to a destructive degree.
Then fast forward in the game, and when Fuyuhiko is losing it, he's about to throw everything away just for the sake of seeing Peko again and not wanting to face the possibility of not seeing her again (even though BOTH choices means he's lost her). They're all ready to make the self-preserving choice, but he specifically is making it for that reason. What's worse to me though, after all the stuff about wanting Peko to be her own person and refusing to see her as anything less, he's still ready to let Junko take over her body just so he can pretend she's still there. That's the opposite of where his development was going! At his worst, when he's pushed to the brink, he's ready to give up her autonomy if it means she's still "alive". That's pretty awful. Bad move, Hiko.
And then Peko (or at least the memory of her) along with Hajime snaps him out of it, Peko by telling him to grow tf up and make the right choice, or something along those lines. Yay we love to see it you tell em Peko
OK so that was just introspection on what we already know.
Now as for the future
I'd like it if Fuyuhiko, maybe with some help, would realize how complicated and messy and probably unhealthy his feelings about Peko are (and vice versa). He was willing to go way, way too far; for Peko's sake partially, but also for his own sake, because he's so intense about his friendship and loyalty.
I'd say it's a lot of him just not wanting to be alone or without his one person that's always been there, but also, he owes Peko a better life than what she got, so there's a lot of guilt there too. But my sweet boy, my darling shithead, just takes it so far. It's not healthy.
So, ideally, Fuyuhiko will spend some time with the Survivors and realize, with less life-or-death-intense-but-still-completely-solid friendships, that he might need to re-evaluate how he approaches Peko from now on.
In the event that she wakes up, man he would really be tested, but after the initial clingy period, might encourage her to seek out other people and develop her own support net that aren't him.
(Hajime, ultimate counselor, will probably have to mediate because God damn they're both so fucking intense about each other and have a hard time being apart.)
I'd *like* it if she managed to form some solid bonds with others (Ibuki is *right there*), to get that basing her entire lif and existence on this one guy isn't the right way to do it. It's not fair to him, even! He feels bad that his best friend sees him as a boss or a lord! She's gotta learn how to be healthy about her own boundaries, her personhood, and relationships in general. I'm assuming she never got the chance to do normal people shit long-term, so here's her chance! Go on silly dates, hang out with your friends, sleepovers, gossip, just!! Have a fun time tbh
Her an and Hajime might even become fast friends! He's everyone's buddy, had a total crush on her, and now they have Fuyuhiko as a mutual Close Friend. Imagine them swapping stories and making fun together aww. Her and Gundham would totally vibe too I can feel it. One Gundham-appointed animal companion, stat! Let Peko have like, an awful little purse dog or sth lol.
Like that extra scene where she splits a melon, I want more of that. Making people happy just because, and people valuing her and her skills at her own pace (not using her as The Sword Lady, but like, appreciating her talents when she decides to show them off; that includes other talents too, like tree climbing hehe)
Ideally, they both just get a little more chill about each other, while maintaining their very special and still super strong bond. They're still attached at the hip and love each other So. MUCH. But they know how to be apart, and maintain close relationships with others, maybe even date people. But they're always each other's #1, I think.
I have a headcanon that they both worry about what they were to each other during their memory gaps (Peko sees that he's missing the same fuckin eye and blames herself for seemingly not protecting him, Fuyuhiko remembers a bit more since he was awake longer and knows how delusional he was and how much he used Peko as an assassin). But it comes to light that actually they stayed together the whole time, as equals mostly, and Fuyuhiko has a tattoo (crossed swords) to confirm it (also one for his sister). So yay they actually never stop loving each other even when they're loopy <3
If I got any game facts wrong plz tell me the playthrough was so long and I can't remember things fully
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visitmedali · 1 year
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My idiot coworker found a flash drive in the parking lot and plugged it into their work computer. Turns out it had a rotom in it, and now the network's down and I'm pretty sure someone has my personal information from HR.
Can you tell me a heartwarming story about one of your pokemon to cheer me up?
Huh. I've never heard of something like that. You would think that you could tell when there's a rotom haunting the drive but... it seems not. That's unfortunate. I wonder if your coworker's going to keep their job. Certainly not going to be their best evaluation that month... Anyway, I can't say I'm a storyteller, but I'll try my best to provide something heartwarming. So... my Dudunsparce was my second pokemon. I caught her as a Dunsparce, of course. And she stayed that way for a long time. It sounds a bit silly, but I never even realized she could evolve until I moved here... there's just something about the Paldea air, I guess. She and Staraptor never completely worked well together. I mean, they didn't fight, but they kept to themselves. As more pokemon joined my team, Staraptor had no problem establishing relationships with all of them. Even Braviary... and he's been quite the difficult coworker for everyone. Dunsparce just didn't seem interested in teamwork with anyone. Or interested in much at all, really... she tends to spend a lot of time asleep. She's always put in good work when I need her to, though. This was all the case up until I needed a new team member for my gym team... I didn't have anything special in mind. Really, I just caught a common pokemon right outside of Medali- I like when things aren't too interesting anyway, it's easier that way. So that's when Komala joined our team. She's quite the sweetheart. I mean, she's always asleep, so there's not a great variance in emotions there, but she's always trying to hang on to me and cuddle up... Unless Dudunsparce is around. When they first met, Komala rolled at an impressive speed right towards her. I thought it'd end up with poor Komala getting paralyzed with a glare, but to my surprise Dudunsparce was not only gentle with her but then curled around her— to the best of her ability to do so, anyway. I can't explain it, but now they've been inseparable since the first time they met. Dudunsparce is cold-blooded, you know, so there's no additional warmth for Komala... and Komala isn't even conscious for Dudunsparce to do much with. But I guess that's the point. They both just want someone simple and quiet to nap with... Well, I guess I do understand. Nothing beats a good nap.
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Since they've bonded, Dudunsparce has performed at her best. She's sent out after Komala, so I guess knowing her friend has fainted makes her more determined than ever... Oh, Dudunsparce's name is Fido, if you're curious. I never thought much of it before, but I've realized here that people seem to expect a different pokemon when you say that name... Luckily, I tend to keep it simple by just referring to the species' name anyway. Thank you for your question. I know it's not the most riveting story, but I don't think you'd expect that from me anyway.
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atwstedstory · 10 months
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So there was a picrew trend going around on Twitter called “Your OC x Canon Ship as Kids” and I initially thought “I’m just gonna do this for my polycule since I’m already drafting an AU for this” and b/c I am ✨GOOFY✨ I ended up doing all my ships with little quotes/stories to go with em so without further ado—YEETS
I’m certain folks will put two and two together as they read but just in case:
Tristan 🎨 Rose 🤍 Fafnir 🦋 Aarav 🏜️ Rem 🫧
➤ As I mentioned above, I already have an AU for this for my polycule, one where Tristan was actually born into Twisted Wonderland instead of another world. (I have two versions of this AU, but that’s a story for another time.) In the first iteration of this AU, Tristan is childhood friends with Leona, and they meet Malleus later on, with all three of them growing up together. Some of this AU involves Big Sads™ with Tristan's parents (b/c they're both still pricks in this AU, sadly), as seen in the first part below.
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🎨 "W-Who...Who's there?" 🐉 "...Sorry to startle you." 🎨 "I-It's ok! Nice to meet you!" 🐉 "Nice to meet you, as well. I'm curious, though...why are you in the middle of the forest crying? Are you hurt?" 🎨 "N-No...Mama started yelling again at me again, so I came out here to be with my garden." 🐉 "You have a garden all the way out here?" 🎨 "Yeah, I can show you! I have lots and lots of pretty flowers!"
➤ Tristan and Leona would be childhood friends in this AU and while Leona might act like Tristan is a thorn in his side, he's very quick to stick up for him when someone tries to bully him or when Tristan's mom fly off the handle.
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🦁 "Ha! Gotcha!" 🎨 "Yay! You found me, Leo!" 🦁 "Of course I found ya, your hiding spots are all the same." 🎨 "Nuh uh! I pick good spots!" 🦁 "Sureeeeeee you do. C'mon, we gotta hurry back to my place before your mama gets back." 🎨 "Ok, I'll pack some stuff! Are you sure it's ok I can stay with you guys?" 🦁 "I'm NOT letting you stay here with her, ya got that?" 🎨 "Ok...Thank you, Leo!"
➤ Now Rem and Jade are the one ship out of all my ships that this is quite literal for since they grew up together. They met about half a year after Rem's family died and he was placed in an orphanage, and they've been INSEPARABLE ever since. Floyd and Azul are the only two people who could explain to you just how much these two mean to each other, and even then there aren't really enough words in the world to describe it. xD
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🫧 "Ha! Told ya I'd find ya!" 🐬 “Heehee! You found me!" 🫧 "I'll always find ya, ya goober." 🐬 “I just make it easy for you to find me!"
➤ Lilia and Fafnir as kids I imagine would've been hell on Earth since they both are rambunctious and trouble happens to find them somehow, whether that's them making it or it following them. xD (I might expand on this as more info comes out through Book 7, so this section is merely head canon for now.)
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🦋 "There! Now you have flowers that match mine!" 🦇 "You made them look quite lovely! Thank you, Fafnir." 🦋 "Lilia Vanrouge actually thanking me for once? I can die happy now!" 🦇 "Rude! I always thank you, you silly butterfly!" 🦋 "If I'm a silly butterfly, then you're a silly bat!" 🦇 "I'll happily be a silly bat, silly butterfly!" 🦋 "LILIA VANROUGE!" 🦇 "Let me guess--'I'm insufferable'?" 🦋 "Y-You're teasing me!" 🦇 "You're funny to tease!"
➤ Thinking about Rose and Ruggie in this AU is funny b/c both of them would be just as confused to see each other. Rose technically didn't have a "childhood", but it's nice to think about. :D
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🍩 "Whoaaaaaaa...you look like one o' those angels or somethin'..." 🤍 "An...angel?" 🍩 "Yeah, like with all the sparkles an' stuff!" 🤍 "Sparkles..." 🍩 "Well, ya don't have sparkles, but your freckles'll do!" 🤍 "Oh yay!" 🍩 "Hey, does the freckled angel have a name?" 🤍 "I'm...Rose." 🍩 "Hi, Rose, I'm Ruggie! Our names kinda match!" 🤍 "Matching...names...I like that." 🍩 "Me too!"
➤ Another ship that's funny to think about as kids would be my Aarav and @soul--surgeon's Gio! xD Even though Aarav initially grew up in poverty, he's been exposed to a little bit of everyone from all walks of life, so he wouldn't be surprised to see someone like Gio come through the Scalding Sands. If anything, he would've been impressed with his big lizard tail and tried to talk to him. xD
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🏜️ "Hey! I like your tail!" 🦎 "Huh, my tail?" 🏜️ "Yeah! It looks super cool!" 🦎 "Oh...thanks! Lotta folks don't usually say something about it." 🏜️ "Meh, folks are weird!" 🦎 "Yeah, they kinda are! Oh hey--I like your eyes!" 🏜️ "Oh thanks! They're two different colors like my Momma's!"
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