#this has been in my drafts for so long sorry!!! i got the go ahead to make an official announcement so i can post tbis now :) and i’ll post

[forest-hashira]

2 Be Loved

this has sat in my drafts for... idk exactly how long, a month at least, because i was trying to decide if i even wanted to post it here. i wrote this for myself when i was Going Through It with my depression. now that i've sat on it a while, and i've generally been doing better, i've decided it's time to go ahead and share this. i hope you all enjoy it, and that it brings you some level of comfort or reassurance if you need it 💜

read on ao3 here | wc: ~2.4k | cw: gender neutral reader, plus size reader, mental health issues (reader is in a depressive episode), emotional hurt/comfort, some fluff at the end, really this is very self ship coded

You’d spent practically the whole day in bed. And the day before that, and the day before that, and probably the day before that, too. You’d lost count, honestly; all the days bleeding together and blurring in the fog of your mind. 

This was far from the first time this had happened, and you knew it would also be far from the last. Your emotional state had been a rollercoaster for most of your life, and had only become more volatile in the last few years. You would be fine, until you suddenly realized you were decidedly not fine, with some realizations being more gentle than others.

Like this time, for example. You hadn’t suddenly buckled under the weight of the world, but instead had woken up one morning and felt paralyzed; even just the idea of getting out of bed, for any reason, felt insurmountable. So you simply… didn’t. You stayed in bed and slept between episodes of your favorite TV show, grasping for anything that might stop you from sinking further into the depths of your depression. 

Satoru had been as patient as ever, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead and whispering a little “I love you,” before he’d left for work. He knew you struggled this way sometimes, and had never been anything but supportive and loving. Suguru had called in “sick”, opting to spend the day taking care of you, which mostly consisted of slipping in and out of sleep all day and occasionally bringing a snack from the kitchen. Satoru had joined you back in bed as soon as he got home from work, effectively squishing you between himself and Suguru, where you were helpless to do anything but let them love you.

It had reduced you to tears, shoulders shaking as ugly, half choked sobs tore themselves from your chest. They had let you cry, not rushing to try and quiet you as they might have done when they were younger; they let you get it out of your system, only stepping in to comfort you when you started to speak. 

“I’m sorry,” you’d cried, eyes shut tight as you tried to avoid their gaze. “I’m sorry I’m…” you’d struggled for words then, losing them between your hiccuping sobs and the darkness that clouded your mind. 

“I’m too much,” you’d come up with eventually. “My emotions are too messy, and my mind doesn’t work right… I feel like all I do is cause problems for both of you. Like all I do is hold you back and drag you down.”

You hadn’t seen the look they’d exchanged, the pain that pinched their features, but you had felt the way they pressed in closer, as if they could crush the depression out of you. 

“You are not too much,” Satoru had murmured, gently tilting your head up to meet his gaze, his cerulean eyes sparkling in the low light from the lamp on your bedside table. “You could never be too much, not to me – to us.” His thumb brushed lightly along your cheekbone, delicately wiping the tears from your skin even as they were replaced with more. “We love you so much, y’know? I love you so much. Taking care of you is not a chore, or a burden.”

You’d shaken your head, unable to believe his words. “You can’t possibly mean that.”

“But we do,” Suguru had been the one to speak that time. “You mean it when you tell me the same thing when I’m depressed, right?”

“Of course I do.” There wasn’t any hesitation as the words left your lips. “Taking care of you is a privilege.”

“Then why can’t you believe we feel the same way about taking care of you?”

His words had left you reeling, so much so that you almost didn’t hear Suguru when he continued. 

“Satoru’s right, angel. I love you. We adore you, and we want to take care of you. Always.”

As Suguru had hugged you tighter with one arm and pressed gentle kisses to your shoulder, he’d placed his other hand on your white haired lover’s hip, keeping him as close as possible. Satoru had been eager to oblige, snuggling into you as much as possible. He’d brushed your hair from your face and pressed a kiss to your forehead, one hand cradling your face while the other reached across you to settle on Suguru’s hip. They had effectively caged you in, both with their bodies and with their love. It had shattered you, reduced you to tears again, but they hadn’t minded; they were there to hold you together, to pick up the pieces when you couldn’t do it alone. 

Through some unspoken agreement, your boys switched places the next day; Suguru had gone into work while Satoru had called out “sick” to take care of you. They did their best not to leave you alone for too long whenever they could help it, but they could only get away with calling out sick when everyone knew the two of them were perfectly healthy; when the higher ups knew that you were the one keeping the two special grades and teachers from fully doing their jobs.

A few days passed with your lovers taking turns staying home with you, until one day they both called out to stay home, though you didn’t realize that at first, since Suguru was quick to return to you in bed, holding you close as you drifted off again, faintly away of the sound of the front door closing and locking before you were fully asleep. 

When you woke up again, the first thing you were aware of was the fact that you were alone in bed. At almost the same moment, though, you heard music coming from what you guessed what the kitchen, though you couldn’t quite tell, since the bedroom door was shut; wherever it was coming from, it was definitely upbeat pop music, so you knew for certain Satoru was the one who had turned it on.

With no small amount of effort, you pushed yourself into a sitting position, rubbing your eyes for a moment and yawning before you crawled off the bed on Satoru’s side. You shuffled over to the dresser then, opening drawers and grabbing clothes pretty much at random. You wound up in a black sweatshirt and a pair of light blue sweatpants, both of which were at least two sizes too big for you, which even your fuzzy brain knew meant they weren’t actually your clothes; they belonged to your two giants of lovers.

Once you were dressed, you turned back to the nightstand, grabbing one of Suguru’s hair ties to pull your hair out of your face with, and, after a deep breath, you decided to brave the kitchen.

Opening the door to the bedroom allowed you to fully hear the music that was playing, and you were a little surprised to realize it was in English, rather than Japanese. Satoru liked to listen to anything that was happy and upbeat enough, but he – understandably – had a bit of a preference for J pop music. 

Still a little surprised by the music choice and a little foggy from sleep, you make your way to the kitchen in a bit of a daze. Both Satoru and Suguru were in the kitchen: Suguru at the counter, mixing something in the stand mixer, while Satoru danced around to the music, occasionally trying to steal a bit of whatever Suguru had in the mixing bowl, and being effectively swatted away every time. You stood in the doorway for a few moments in silence, just watching them in utter adoration.

Eventually, though, Satoru noticed you, and he got a bright grin on his face as he raced over to you. “You got out of bed!” he gushed, wrapping you up in a tight hug and pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “I’m so proud of you, mochi,” he murmured against your scalp, and something about the nickname in combination with the praise made you feel like you were going to melt into a puddle right then and there. 

Just as suddenly as he had engulfed you in a hug, the white haired sorcerer was releasing you, lunging for where he’d left his phone on the counter by the bluetooth speaker he was using for the music. You watched curiously as he opened his playlist, hastily skipping through a handful of songs before he got to the one he was apparently looking for. Seeming pleased with himself, he made sure the song was playing, turned the volume up a little bit, then turned back to you with that sparkling grin of his. 

You blinked in surprise when you heard the singer’s voice, and you looked up at him with a look of complete bafflement. “I didn’t know you listened to Lizzo.”

He sighed dramatically and rolled his eyes. “No, baby, you gotta listen to the lyrics!” he insisted, taking your hands and doing a very small little dance with you right there in the doorway. 

Though part of you wanted to argue, you had never been good at resisting your energetic lover, and this time was no exception. Before you even nodded, Satoru already knew you’d given in to him, and he pulled you a bit closer to himself as he started singing along with the lyrics. And not quietly, either: he sang them with all the enthusiasm in his body, and though you hated to admit it, it was contagious, even in your depressed state.

By the end of the first verse, you were smiling, a small laugh escaping you at your lover’s almost puppyish behavior. When the chorus came around, you started singing along as well, and you noticed belatedly that Satoru was singing the lines of the background singers, rather than the main chorus, like you were. 

“Am I ready?”

“You deserve it now.”

“‘Cause I want it!”

“That’s what I’m talkin’ about.”

“Am I ready?”

“You gon’ figure it out.”

“To be loved, to be loved.”

Your singing faltered then, and you stared up at Satoru for a moment, suddenly realizing why he’d picked this song to serenade you with. He stopped singing as well, smiling gently down at you as he watched you fit the puzzle pieces together in your mind.

“We’ve always been ready to love you.”

The sound of Suguru’s voice from behind you caused you to startle a bit, but you looked up at him with wide, disbelieving eyes. 

“Are you ready to let us love you again?” His tone held no resentment, no bitterness, only gentle adoration, and you were certain that if Satoru didn’t still have a solid grip on your hands, you would have sunk to your knees with the overwhelming realization of how much these two men adored you, despite how much your mind sometimes tried to convince you they shouldn’t.

Unable to find your voice, you nodded, blinking back the tears that threatened to spill down your cheeks. You allowed your eyes to flutter shut for a moment as Suguru leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of your head, but just a few seconds later, Satoru was tugging you back into his space, spinning you around so your back was to his chest. The song was still playing and he was apparently still determined to get you to dance with him.

Suguru laughed softly at his lover’s antics, shaking his head slightly at Satoru and offering you a slight shrug when you looked up at him for some sort of explanation.

Now the subject of Satoru’s whims, you allowed him to dance around the kitchen with you in his arms, still singing along with the song, though now his volume was lower, as he sang the words down at you. You smiled, allowing yourself to get lost in the warmth of his love, even if his fingers were cold where they wrapped around your own. 

“He call me Melly, he squeeze my belly.”

Your eyes flew open as Satoru sang the words, his chilly hands coming down to squeeze at the soft flesh of your stomach, the touch pulling a rather undignified squeak from your lips, but he just continued to beam down at you. He wasn’t going along with the lyrics of the song to make fun of you – he’d expressed to you enough times that he adored the soft pudginess of your body for you to know he meant it – but it still surprised every time he made sure to pay special attention to the squishier parts of you.

The sound of your squeak pulled another laugh from Suguru, and though at first you were planning to glare at him, you couldn’t go through with it; not when his expression was full of so much love and relief. He crossed the kitchen to reach you again, whatever was in the mixer long forgotten in favor of you. When he reached out for you, going to him was easier than breathing. He pulled you close, pressing his lips to the crown of your head as he swayed around the kitchen with you. The movement didn’t match the energy of the song at all, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to care. You were safe and secure in his arms, and Satoru had enough energy for all three of you; it was impossible not to watch him as he danced around the kitchen, white hair and blue eyes shining, and he flashed you that brilliant grin of his every time he caught your gaze. 

Things weren’t suddenly perfect; Lizzo and dancing in the kitchen was not a magical fix-it for the irregularities in your emotional state, but it was certainly a stepping stone back to your normal. And you knew, without any doubt in your mind, that you would have the support and full confidence of your lovers behind you every step of the way. They were your way back to yourself, after all. Suguru was your anchor in stormy seas, tethering you to something real, something sturdy; Satoru was the lighthouse calling you home when the waters calmed enough for you to move again.

i hope you guys have enjoyed seeing some of my other stuff i hadn't yet shared here! though i can't promise when i'll have anything new, know that i am working on things now + am preparing things for my upcoming milestone event!!! take care of yourselves as best you can 💜. divider by cafekitsune

tagging: @kentohours @mitsuristoleme @marinnnnnnnnn @witchbybirth @peachdues

[vintagevict0ria]

𝙸 𝚌𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞

“You brush past me in the hallway…”

chapter 1

pairing: Adam Driver x f!reader

content: n/a

a/n: omg i am soooooo excited for this you have no idea. Its been so long since i posted and this idea has been stuck in my drafts since july and since im back in my Adam driver era- id thought id finish this. This is mostly inspired by Taylor Swifts song "I can see you" and each chapter will be based on a lyric! So i am no expert on how film/actor/movie stuff works so bear with me. Hopeful as this goes on, it will get better. Im planning on finishing this by the new year (who knows if that will happen) but since im on break i should take advantage of my free time. Ok long story short I will be writing this shit non stop since im on a writing high so who knows if the next chapter will come out tommorow! Hope you enjoy! Notes are greatly appreciated!!

Y/n, a famous actress known for her beautiful face and captivating personality but also her incredible acting skills. You had been nominated for over 50 awards and won 5 oscars. It had been a while since you were on a set nor a movie. The last film was a roaring success and the critics were crazy about it! The media begged for another film starring Y/N Y/L/N.

The first thing you heard when you woke up was the sound of your phone ringing. Your agent- Carolina, was calling. You quickly answered- yawning and hoping she wouldn’t hear it. “Y/n! Great news!” You sighed, not really understanding what was happening. “You got the job!” The job? what is she talking about? “huh?” You rubbed your eyes, laying back down. “The movie!! Adam Driver is in it too! Oh my gosh i can hear them now! ‘Y/n y/l/n and Adam Driver are co-stars in the biggest hit of the year!” Once you heard his name, you sprung up “Wait what?” “Yeah! They want you here in LA by tomorrow morning. I’ve already booked you a flight to leave in..5 hours! Bye!” She hung up before you could say another word. You glanced over at the clock- 9:35. The flight was at 2:15 and it would take a while to pack and get ready. So, being the smart woman you are, you got up and started the day. Showering, packing, and of course- stopping to get starbucks.

Once you arrived in LA, you headed to the condo where you would be staying for a majority of filming. That morning you woke up and started getting ready for the day. Showering, and making a coffee before you headed out to the table read. You threw on a pair of leggings and a tshirt. It was late autumn so you took a jacket on the way out. At the studio you said hello to the crew and a huge thank you to the casting director. “Y/n!” It was Carolina- she ran up to you and embraced you in a tight hug. “How was the flight?” You smiled at the redhead girl “Great.” Carolina jumped up and down with excitement and handed you sheets of paper. On the cover was the name of the film, the name of the director-JJ Abrams- and your name. “Heres your script. You need to go ahead and head in there! Bye!” She walked away, the sound of her heals clicked across the floor. You quickly skimmed through the pages while walking and not paying attention. You soon enough ran into someone, your coffee spilling over you and the floor along with your script- which was on the floor…covered in coffee. “Oh gosh Im so sorry!” You apologized while picking up your script, wincing at the wet paper. “You might want to watch where you are going next time.” The voice was soft but stern. You looked up and realized it was Adam Driver.

He was wearing all black and his hair was messy. He glanced at you with a subtle stare. “Im so sorry!” You stood up, brushing yourself off. “No worries, happens to the best of us.” He rolled his shoulders back and popped his neck, closing his eyes. Damn he was attractive. ”You headed in?” You asked, trying to keep your composure together. Adam simply just nodded.

The first day of the read consisted of going over the aspects of the film and the time line of production. After the read through, filming would start, then the movie premiere would take place after filming and production in Hollywood, but that was a whiles away. When the read was over you walked out with another co star. Heading to your condo, you received a text from Carolina. "Girl, just talked to JJ and he just gave me word that there is a sex scene between you and Adam 😁" The stupid emoji at the end made you cringe. Carolina giving you this news shot your nerves through the roof. As if you weren't already nervous enough about working with Adam, having to film a intimate scene made it far worse. Kicking your shoes off and falling onto your bed, you opened instagram, an attempt to get your mind of the situation at hand, it didn't work.

[vxnillavampir]

All I Wanted .1 - Nice Shot

you thought your life was over until you stumbled your way in to jackson. being the new girl around town means that someone has to show you the ropes and what to expect on patrols.

pairing: ellie williams x afab!reader

content warnings: some violent themes, reader takes out a couple of dudes and infected, joel makes an appearance, reader has relations with a man (briefly mentioned, barely even an aspect of the story), bad writing, not proofread. even though it's not smut, please be 18+ when interacting with my account thank you <3

a/n: hi…so i originally posted a little snippet of this on my old blog, in case this seems like something you have read before! i decided to just post the full chapter here. this is part of a multi part series i have in my drafts. who knows if the other parts will see the light of day.

SUPPORT PALESTINE

word count: 2.3k

November.

The ice-cold water being thrown in your face is what woke you up.

"We're going to need you to start talking." A blurred man kept pacing back and forth in front of you, his southern accent distinct. You shake your head to come to your senses and notice that your hands are tied behind you. The room you were in was dimly lit, the limited daylight peeking through the windows. What time is it? How long were you out? "Tommy take it easy," said another man with the same accent, "she's just a kid."

"I’m not a kid." You spat out.

"So, she speaks." The one that was apparently named Tommy knelt down in front of you. "Who are you? Where did you come from?" His voice was stern.

"California." Your voice sounded pretty groggy, and you cleared your throat to try and get yourself together.

"Jackson is a long way aways...what brought you all the way out here?" You glanced over at the other man who had his arms crossed. He was comfortably leaning against the wall waiting for you to answer. "I had to get out."

"You were...in pretty bad shape when I found you out on the trails. Are you infected?" The other man spoke up.

Tommy jolted up and stormed over to the mystery man. "You didn't even check to see if she was infected? What the hell is wrong with you, Joel!"

"I didn't see any bites when I picked her up..."

"I'm not. I was only passed out because I hadn't eaten in a few days..." Your stomach chimed in at the perfect time and both men looked over at you, relaxing a bit.

Joel sighed and uncrossed his arms. "You can eat when we figure out if you're going to be a problem or not." A problem? You guys are the ones that tied me up! You thought. "I don't mean to be any trouble. You can untie me, and I'll be on my way."

"Not with injuries like that," Joel gestured to your several cuts and stab wounds, "how'd you get those anyway?"

"I had to fight like hell out of my hometown. I don't feel like reliving it just yet." Your voice trailed off, feeling a bit faint once again from lack of food. The bearded man nodded slowly and unbound your wrists. Joel helped you up and your legs couldn't help but shake and wobble. "Woah, easy." He said softly and wrapped his strong arm around you to help you up.

    "Hey, don't go passing out on me again." Calloused fingers tilted your chin up and you opened your eyes. You looked around at your new surroundings. A bar? Where the hell did Joel take you? "Food as promised." He passed a bowl of food over in your direction. You two were sat in one of the few booths while soft rock played on one of the speakers. It has been a long time since you had electricity. The smell of hearty stew filled your nose and your stomach growled once again. Before you could even think, you were stuffing your face. "Okay slow down or else you're going to choke." The man chuckled in front of you. "Now why don't you go ahead and tell me your name?"

You swallowed before speaking up to introduce yourself. "That's a nice name you got. As you probably already know by now, I'm Joel, and the other guy is my brother. 'S name's Tommy...sorry he gave you such a hard time."

"It's fine...I guess. This place is pretty nice...at least from what I've seen in the two minutes I have been conscious."

"Yeah, sometimes Jackson has its moments. Better than a QZ."

"I wouldn't know. I just stayed on my family farm this whole time. I've heard some stories about life in a QZ, though."

"Family farm, huh? Sounds like you're one of the lucky ones." Joel cracked half a smile, thinking about what it would be like to live by himself on a patch of land.

"Yeah. Guess you could say that..."

"Y'know...we actually do need someone to join our patrol team. Do you have any experience with that?"

"I mostly just fixed fences and made sure our livestock was taken care of. Since we were so far away from the city, I never had to take down any of those creeps at the time if that's what you're wondering...but I can handle myself."

That part was clear. You can't travel over a thousand miles on foot without being able to take care of yourself. "You could stay here for a night and rest up. We can see how you do on one of our routes in the morning. What do you say?"

"Yes! Just as long as you don't tie me up again." A dry laugh escaped your lips before you continued to devour your food.

            The next day you woke up bright and early in a studio apartment that Joel and Tommy had near their place. It was nice to actually sleep on a bed for once. After you got ready for the day you heard a knock at the door. An impatient auburn-haired woman stood in front of you, her arms crossed. "Uh, hey. I'm Ellie. Tommy told me I needed to show you the ropes. Whatever that means."

You nodded. "Okay. I'll just go grab my bag." You shifted around your things and stuffed your backpack with a few necessities you might need like your trusty bow and some arrows, along with your daggers and emergency pistol.

Ellie stood by a horse that you can only assume is hers, arms still crossed. You couldn't tell if she was cold or if she was just pissed off. "Got everything?" You nodded, watching her as she effortlessly got on the horse. "The stables are empty so...we're gonna have to share." She said awkwardly. "Oh..." You breathed out and attempted to climb on.

"Here, let me help." She extended out her hand and you reluctantly accepted it. All of this was so embarrassing. You have been on horses before and even grew up with them, but your injuries made it difficult to get on your own this time. Once you managed to get up Ellie signaled for the horse to take off. The jolt of movement caused you to instinctively grab onto her waist so you wouldn't fall off the damn thing.

Ellie couldn't help but feel a little smug about this situation, I mean, she had a pretty girl holding on to her for dear life. "So, I'm guessing that you never ride?" She called out to you.

"I ride a lot of things." You joked to ease how awkward this whole experience is, hearing a snort from Ellie. "Awful joke, new girl."

The scenery of this trail was absolutely beautiful, the lively green foliage was everywhere in this forest. It was well maintained—probably because of Ellie. "Wow..." You said in almost a whisper.

"What?" Ellie glanced around to make sure there was no danger.

"It's so...green."

"You don't have plants where you're from? They're everywhere. Literally."

"California is rarely this green. It's called the Golden State for a reason..." Mentioning the state where you're from sent you into a fight or flight state. The trauma you experienced was triggered just by thinking about your hometown.

"Mom? Are you okay?" Your mother was still...a little too still. She was standing over the dead body of your father. Her head turned to meet your eyes at the sound of your voice, her skin paler than usual and her mouth covered in blood. She was infected. Before you knew it, she was sprinting at you and thankfully your adrenaline kicked in.

She chased you out of the house and into the barn where you kept your livestock. The cows mooing at the sight of your uncharacteristically feral mother. She tried to hop the gates to get to the animals and you quickly grabbed the rake resting on the barn door, impaling her with it, the rake going through her neck with ease and the sound of her blood gurgling would be seared into your brain forever.

"Hey, you with me new girl?" Ellie's raspy voice broke you out of your flashback, your arms practically shaking around her torso. "Y-yeah...just...a bad memory."

"Do you...want to talk about it?" She suggested, not knowing if you would actually take her up on the offer or not. After all, you two had just met. "No. Sorry."

"Don't apologize. I totally get it." All of the stories Ellie kept secret would surprise you.

"Alright, this is far enough." She signaled for the horse to stop and helped you down off the saddle. "Stay here, Shimmer. Don't do anything I wouldn't do." You couldn't help but crack a slight smile at how Ellie communicates with her horse. The sight of her chiseled hand stroking Shimmer sent a shiver down your spine. God, how long has it been since you saw another mentally coherent hot person? Get it together.

She stepped away from the horse and ducked down behind some bushes, her rough hand grabbing your wrist and gently dragging you down to meet her level. "Hunters." She gestured towards the two men walking mindlessly along the trail. "Let's see what you can do."

You quietly take out the bow that you had packed earlier and a few arrows from your backpack. Your eyes fixated on the stalky blond man following a slightly shorter man, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. When the man in front of him bent down to tie his boots you took a deep breath to steady your hands and your mind. This is it. You released the arrow from your fingertips at the same time you released the air from your lungs. The arrow glided through the air before taking out the unknown man with a headshot. The sound of his body thudding to the ground sent the other man into a scared frenzy. "Where are you?! Come out here you coward!"

"Nice shot. Now him." Ellie watched you in awe as you loaded up another arrow, the first arrow hitting the hunter in the stomach and the second in the throat. "How's that?" You said quietly in case there were more enemies around. "Good. Really good actually." Her words made your cheeks flush. You were always a fan of words of affirmation and encouragement. "Looks like the coast is clear. Let's get back to the others."

             After everyone got back from their routes, you all decided to blow off some steam at the bar you were at just the night before. The charming place was lit up by fairy lights and candles to create ambient romantic lighting. It looked so beautiful. "Everyone, we finally have a competent person joining our patrols! Jesse, please don't sleep with her. Please. I beg." Ellie said to the tall dark-haired man with her hands held together like she was praying. "You know I can't make promises that I might not keep," Jesse said slyly before extending his hand for you to shake. You shook his hand politely and introduced yourself to everyone else.

An hour later you were slowly sipping at your whisky and started people watching. The last twenty-four hours had worn you out and it was nice to see so many people living...normally—or at least what would be considered normal now. Ellie was dancing with Dina, and you couldn't help but feel a little bit jealous at the sight of her cheeks getting flushed from having Dina's arms around her neck.

"Another drink?" Jesse chimed in, snapping you out of your jealous thoughts. "Trying to get me drunk?" You smirked at him before taking the drink from his hand.

"You caught me. That was my intention all along." He joked as he took a seat next to you at the bar. "So...wanna gossip? I know some pretty juicy stuff about almost everyone here." The offer did sound pretty tempting...

"Sure, I'll bite. What's going on with those two?" You gestured over towards Ellie and Dina. Jesse let out a prolonged sigh at the sight of the two of them. "Those two...a little bit of a will they won't they thing they have going on. I mean, I guess Ellie could use a win since she broke up with her last girlfriend." Girlfriend. That's promising at least.

"Do you know what happened between them?"

"No. Ellie is a closed book most of the time. You only know what she wants you to know." You nodded at his words and took another sip of your drink. The alcohol creates a warm pool in your stomach. "Dina on the other hand, we are kinda in an on-again-off-again relationship..."

"And right now you're...off?"

"Yeah..." Jesse looked at the floor to keep his eyes off the two of them. It was hard, he was friends with Ellie and his ex-girlfriend had an obvious crush on her.

"I feel like we're going to need another round of these." You say after taking one last sip from the clean glass and handing it to him. Jesse chuckled and went back to the bar to get more booze. If you were going to do what you had planned to do tonight, you needed more liquid courage to get over these nerves. It had been a long time since you had any affection and it seemed like Jesse would be able to give it to you. At least for the night.

So you went back to his place.

AHHHH omg there i finally posted something y’all. please let me know what you think!

dividers by cafekitsune <333

© vxnillavampir 2024 - don’t copy, steal, translate, repost, or plug any of my works into an ai.

[pensbridge]

This is a thought I had before that I'm rethinking a bit since they decided to drop the trailer yesterday (bless! Oops buried this in my drafts and never got around to finishing til now)

Warning: Long post! (I'm sorry or you're welcome)

I've been trying to stay away from spoilers, so I could be totally off base here, but

Thinking about how Colin will react to Whistledown

I've already talked about Colin having to be needed, but surely there will be layers...

Colin has that line in ep. 1, where he talks about ruining LW and how she ruined his family, yeah after she rips him a new one in the paper - it's a clear deflection. This was never going to be about Marina, or his family. This is about Penelope seeing through the very real facade of Colin, and the fact that he'll believe she thinks those things of him. Because he's insecure if he'll be good enough for her. He needs to be needed, but also I assume Colin will be hurt at the deceit and mindblown at what it means when he puts the pieces together. Replaying certain moments/events, as well as oh, that's why that was so weird. moments that make him feel pain about the sincerity of their romantic relationship right ahead of their nuptials. Because up until the carriage, Colin thought Penelope couldn't see through him. That him trying to be someone else was working. That he was concealing his obvious feelings well. (And he was right; when Penelope "is this a ploy for attention" Whistledown couldn't see him foaming at the mouth and about to pass out on dance floors to know that something had changed.) The carriage was his moment of admission to everything he's been hiding from himself. And she's Whistledown! She's the one who first pointed out those things about him. She even said "does Mr. Bridgerton even know, himself?". He is going to be hurt for what he perceives is her looking down on him. He is going to feel betrayed, because it will seem like a joke he wasn't in on about himself. He's probably going to cry from that, because it will all feel unreal (maybe even like their relationship is fake and she was playing him; he's still insecure about how he's perceived and fearful of getting hurt, especially with Penelope). And the carriage will probably feel meaningless to what he believes her to view it as. like: "what do you mean you saw me pretending all this time for weeks?" Colin was on a different timeline in his feelings and when they sprung into action, they really sprung to all feel like it happened all at once for him. For Colin, it was like they spent all this time together now, he saw her for who she really is - to be less concerned for how she appears to him - and it was like something had really changed between them. And then, to know that Penelope's got an inside edition to how exactly he is maybe feeling, before he fully knows himself.. It's like he gave a full speech on that part of himself (how he portrays himself), and she already had an idea!

It's a complicated scenario, because on one hand there's this conflict between them of the secrecy and certain level of deception (Penelope having this information he's unaware to when they're supposed to be getting married), but on the other side of it Penelope sees him and knows him better than he knows himself (and I don't even think she's aware of it) - it's really the soulmatism aspect of them.

But the carriage won't be ruined. Because Colin and Pen at the core are meant to fall for each other due to seeing the sum of all their parts. Colin now sees Pen, which as I was saying before was not possible without Penelope dropping her crush veil and acting unnaturally around him. Like, right now, he's sure he loves her, because the pieces clicked in the past few weeks. Pieces clicked that he's not even fully aware how or why they come together, and there's a subconscious feeling to the things that can't be explained. I mean, when he goes to see Penelope outside her house and she's like "Whistledown did not want to seem suspicious;" (girl, wtf ), that's a piece to Penelope that he doesn't have the answers to, but he senses. It's all going to make sense once he has time to process and be privy to the hidden pieces of why they are compatible. But, sometimes things just fall perfectly into place without the why.

And he still doesn't know about her feelings prior to the carriage. Like, he thinks, "we both got closer over the past few weeks and we fell for each other through that" (he knows Penelope has always been a constant and that his feelings go back far deeper although he can't pinpoint an exact moment, but up until she reveals it, he's not gonna think she feels that (he probably thought they both fell through the kiss); like they were just good friends and somehow those moments in the past weeks have awakened something in them that neither has realized until this moment).

But that obviously won't last for long. Same as a fight (most likely) won't extend into this long drawn out thing of actual opposition.

And back to the Marina vs Pen debate, the answer to the difference is as simple as this: he didn't love her; he loves Pen! There's nothing more complicated about it; it wasn't real and that goes beyond just the willing deceit of Marina. I could talk about the rose- colored glasses romance/love idealization trope and how that's important to the development (*cough how the change to the show makes sense*), but the crowd isn't ready for that. [I love Marina, therefore her slander will not be allowed here]. But I'll just say the illusion of someone vs knowing someone is going to be the biggest difference [and the greatest catalyst (more on that later)] for how this plays out. Despite not knowing the Whistledown secret, Colin knows Penelope.

It's funny how similar they really are. They're both over-romanticizers. They're idealistic and they both idealized someone and had the pedestal knocked down. We already saw Pen's moment for this, the vital poor declaration moment at the ball. Now, I'm thinking Colin is going to have to battle this idea. He loves her, we know this! We also know that Colin can be impulsive for all of it's good and bad qualities. He is going to have to fight this idea where he acts towards his deepest insecurities. He's sitting outside the bedroom, so it looks promising (lol)! He's angry, but he's ruminating and he's internalizing all of that confusion and fear (I know they'll fight ofc, but for the little moments like that..). He thinks love is a thunderbolt in the sky, not that he fell for her like that, but that love is grand, fairytale-ish; he is a true romantic. His proposal shows as much for his his gestures of grandiosity. He's over the moon about the engagement and he's in a happy bubble after the swift timeline of the realization of their feelings. He'll have to break this idea. Because Colin didn't know love before Penelope. In the conflict of the Whistledown reveal, he'll see that love isn't always this gradiose thing. But that it's moments, being fully understanding of one another, wanting the person, seeing them, and (very important for his development) having them see you. Because that's what REAL love is. He'll actually see the real her and the full picture. Thus, we can actually get the real love confession where he says it. His perfect love idea will be shattered, but the end point will be sweet and more worthwhile than actually not knowing someone. They'll have a deep, dork bond, full love connection for life!

[daydreamgoddess14]

The Ties that Bind - Chapter 6

And what if I maybe decided that this isn't actually the last chapter?

Don't ask how my work week is going, I stupidly wrote this instead of the draft report I need to submit on Friday.... Incidentally, the report has a shorter wordcount than this chapter so technically, technically all I need is some actual ooomph to go ahead and write it!

CH 1 | CH 2 | CH 3 | CH 4| CH 5

Masterlist

Tagging: @cillmequick & @thomasshelbyswife

Chapter 6

Weeks had passed since Seren had left. She made her way around the aisle of the supermarket with her new charge, not too fast and not too slow. Heaven forbid she get the speed wrong. 

“That jam there, on the middle shelf.” The elderly woman in the wheelchair said suddenly, pointing vaguely at approximately 80 jars of jam variations.

“This one?”

“No, down.”

“This?”

“No left a bit, the one that looks like cherries.”

“Cherry jam then?”

“No, the one next to it.” Seren resisted the urge to smash every jar on the floor. She held up another jar. “That’s the ticket, love. Now, eggs.”

“You don’t like eggs?” “I want you to make a cake. Coffee and walnut.” Seren hesitated, her last coffee and walnut cake had been demolished in the space of about four hours by David and River.

“How about a vicky sponge instead?” She suggested, scanning the shelves.

“Too sweet. Next to the eggs, there, the walnuts.”

“Coffee and walnut, my favourite.” Another voice chimed in.

“Mine too! She’s refusing to make it though.”

“I’m not refusing, I just-” Seren turned back to the lady, eggs and walnuts in hand. Alongside her stood River.

“Fine Mags, I’ll make coffee and walnut.” She dumped the stuff in the basket on Maggie’s lap. “Excuse me.” She said politely to River and went to push the wheelchair on. “Seren, wait, please?”

“Who’s this young man?” 

“River, nice to meet you.” He shook her hand, Maggie blushed.

“Seren, you told me you were single!”

“I am.”

“I think I’d remember if you’d told me about this fella. He’s very handsome,” she turned to River, “you’re very handsome.”

“That’s because I haven’t told you about him. There’s nothing to tell. This is an old… acquaintance, that’s all.” Maggie’s bark of laughter turned into a hacking cough.

“Old acquaintance. Do I look bloody daft?”

“Come on, we’ve got to get a move on. Senior swim time.” Seren turned the wheelchair away from River and started at speed down the rest of the aisle.

“Bet he’d love to see you in a cossie.”

“Margaret Monroe!” 

“I’m only saying, love. If you’ve got it, flaunt it.” As they rounded the next aisle, Maggie turned in her chair to Seren, “he’s still there.” She whispered loudly enough to be heard by the entirety of the store. “Corrr and he’s looking at you like you hung the moon.” 

“Give it a rest, Mags.” Seren could feel the heat in her cheeks.

“It’s rude to ignore people.” The older woman said sternly.

“It’s a long story. We’ve got to go otherwise you’ll miss swimming.” Maggie raised her hand and waved to River who caught them up easily with no wheelchair to manoeuvre around. 

“How do you know the lovely Seren then?”

“She looked after my grandfather.”

“Oh!” She said brightly, then her face fell a little, “did he die? I’m so sorry.”

“No, no. He’s… fine. He’s his usual self.” River confirmed, noting the relief that crossed Seren’s face.

“Why’d she leave then? Why’d you leave?” Maggie looked back and forth between them.

“I told you, it’s a long story. Do you want to go swimming or not?” Maggie huffed. 

“It was nice to meet you, love. We’re off to the leisure centre for a swim. She keeps telling me it’s good for me.”

“Sounds fun. It was nice to meet you Maggie, see you again.”

“No you won’t.” Seren interrupted.

“Can I call you?” He asked quickly, before the opportunity to ask had disappeared.

“No, please don’t.”

“You should! God knows this girl needs to smile more. Either that or she needs a proper good-”

“I smile loads.” Seren scowled, interrupting quickly to stop Maggie from saying something less appropriate. Maggie rolled her eyes. As she went to push the wheelchair through the checkout, River dropped Seren’s favourite chocolate bar into the basket.

“For after swimming.” He shrugged. “It’s really good to see you. Still wearing my hoodie though?” He smiled faintly. Seren nodded at the unexpected gesture and to her surprise, River was the one to walk away. As Seren watched him leave, Maggie chattered away next to her.

“Well you kept him quiet, what a lovely man Seren! Bet he’d show you a good time,” the older lady sniggered.

“Stop interfering, you old perv.” Seren teased her gently. “I’m going to stop getting you those smutty books from the library.” She threatened.

“Don’t you dare. I deserve to get my thrills from somewhere young lady.” Seren let her talk, her mind drifting to River. He’d done exactly as she’d asked and not contacted her in weeks. A week after the confrontation in the barn, she received a small box with her book, phone charger, chocolate and various other things she’d left behind at David’s house. It had been hand delivered to her house, she hadn’t sent a thank you message. As the weeks had gone on, she found her anger giving way to sadness. She still felt foolish for having trusted both River and David so completely, she began to feel more betrayed than angry. She’d fended off nosey questions from Maggie when she’d first started looking after her, her bruises still visible and her hand still tightly wrapped. She was so easily distracted by a tall flash of dirty blonde hair in the corner of her eye and now, with the unexpected meeting in the supermarket, she found herself wondering if she’d been right all along and he had really been there, she hadn’t imagined it or wished for it. With Maggie safely back at home, Seren poured herself a glass of wine and tried to settle with a book. A light tap at the door stirred her. River.

“I told you not to come here.” “You told me not to call.” She rolled her eyes, holding the door so it was clear he wasn’t going to be welcomed inside.

“I told you I didn’t want to see you again.”

“I know.”

“So? Why are you here?” She looked at him properly for the first time. Stubble longer than normal, a mournful look in his eyes and dark circles underneath. She knew she didn’t look much better, Maggie told her daily how sad her eyes were. Her resolution to not let him in was wavering. With a sigh, she pulled open the door fully. “Come in. 5 minutes, that’s all you get.” He slipped past her gratefully and she could smell the soap and aftershave he used, scents that had long deserted the hoodie she continued to wear.

“I wanted to apologise. Properly, I mean. I didn’t get a chance really that night, or when you came back to get your car. It was… fucked up. You should never have been caught up in it all.”

“You should have told me the truth.”

“How could I?” He asked, desperately. “I had to keep you safe.” 

“Safe?” She scoffed, closing the space between them and moving the neckline of her top to one side, “I still have the bruises!” Barely visible to the naked eye, River could see the faint marks which still littered her neck. Without thinking, he brought his hand up and traced the outline with his finger. He could make out her pulse, her heart pounded, and the movement of her nervous swallow. She took a step back, shaking her head, “don’t touch me.” She pleaded. His hand and his gaze dropped down to her hand where she still had a bandage.

“Still not healed?” He asked, his voice hoarse. He lifted it gently, holding it in both of his hands.

“They had to align the fracture. Two more weeks and I can take this off.” She felt a warm tear drop onto the exposed skin on the palm of her hand and looked up at him. 

“You got hurt because of me-” he started.

“I got hurt because I stupidly thought I could punch a grown man. I was an idiot, trying to protect David - who apparently can handle himself just fine.” 

“No, you were incredible. If you hadn’t been there… I wouldn’t have been there in time. They’d have done it, they’d have killed him.” She knew she should take another step back but the warmth of his body was intoxicating and she was struggling to hold onto her anger. He released her hand and wiped his eyes.

“How is he?”

“Pain in the arse. Hates everyone they send to look after him. He misses you.”

“Don’t do that. Don’t make me the guilty one.”

“I didn’t mean to, sorry. It’s just… he was better with you, I think.”

“He went through a crazy evening, finding out your old workplace wants you dead is a bit mental.”

“I was better with you.”

“River-”

“I know, I know, I’m sorry again.”

“Stop apologising, you’re doing my head in. You look like crap.” She muttered, wrapping her arms around him. 

“Yeah, so grandad keeps telling me.” He let his head drop into the crook of her neck and breathed her in.

“It’s just a hug, that’s all you get then you can fuck off.” She felt him nod against her and the soft huff of his breath on her skin. The proximity and familiarity made her heart flutter. She reluctantly released the hug, for her own sanity. He watched her intently, the conflict in her eyes clearly visible. He brought his hands up to cup her face and she leaned into his touch, a trembling sigh passing her lips as he met her in a soft, uncertain kiss. She pulled away first, placing a hand on his chest to push herself back. “No. No, I’m still so angry, River.” She paced back and forth in front of him. “I feel like such an idiot for trusting you so implicitly.” She told him, the accusatory tone to her voice gave away the anger rising in her again. She backed further away from him. “You should go now. I asked you not to come.” She marched past him and flung the door open wide. “Go now please, I can’t… I need to stop thinking about you, and the only way I can do that is to not be near you.” She trailed off weakly. He paused as he passed her. 

“I can’t stop thinking about you either.” He admitted cautiously. Seren reached for him first, her traitorous body overruling her mind and all sense of reason. She caught the edge of his jacket and pulled him down into a far less hesitant kiss than the previous one. He kicked the front door shut again and pressed her back against the wall. She led him down the short hallway, dropping his jacket and her (his) hoodie along the way. River pulled off the oversized t-shirt she wore, surprised to find nothing underneath and enveloped her in his arms. He walked her backwards through her open bedroom door, both of them tripping on her discarded shorts, his t-shirt. She pulled him with her onto the bed, hissing in pain as she realised she'd used the wrong hand. He slotted between her open thighs and turned her hand gently, kissing the slither of exposed skin between the thumb and index finger. Seren wanted to hold onto the anger she felt was justified, but she couldn't deny how much she wanted him. He stopped suddenly and she held her breath, waiting. She felt a kiss at the base of her throat and then at each ghost of a fingertip bruise on her neck, faint, but he found them all. She choked back a sob.

“I hate that I need you so badly.” Her whisper turned into a low moan as his long fingers teased a path through the thin layer of her underwear, already soaked with her need for him. She bucked against his hand, holding it in place tightly with her good hand. 

“Show me, Seren,” he demanded quietly, “show me what you need.” He slid the underwear down her legs. She covered his hand with her own and guided it to where she wanted him most. River thrust his fingers into her torturously slowly, building her orgasm from so deeply inside she could hardly breathe. "I've got you," he murmured through kisses, "I've got you." His thumb brushed against her clit and she rocked into him. She grasped at his shoulders as she got closer and closer to the edge. "I want this… want you, always." He kissed her hard as she came, swallowing her moans as she clenched around his fingers, his name on her lips. He worked her through the orgasm, watching her with a mix of pride and lust as she fell boneless into the mattress. 

“I’m not sure this is an appropriate way to earn forgiveness, River.” She whispered, a giggle bubbling in her chest for the first time in weeks.

“Thought I was never going to see you smile again,” he half joked.

“‘M not smiling.”

“Yeah you are.”

“It’s the endorphins. Totally out of my control.” She sat up to look at him, covering herself with her arm. “How do you still have clothes on?” She gestured to his jeans.

“I was more bothered about getting yours off,” he admitted. 

“Some things never change.”

“I’ve missed you so much, Seren.” His head dropped to his chest with a heavy sigh, the tension between them finally cracking. She moved her hand from where it covered her chest and brought it to cup his face, her fingertips running over the stubble. “Everytime I sleep, I see Duffy pointing that fucking gun at you.” He said hoarsely, laying bare his helplessness. Seren closed her eyes, trying to blink away the tears.

“Oh, love.” She sighed. Removing her hand from his face, she got off the bed and pulled on the closest item of clothing, his t-shirt. Then she set about closing the bedroom curtains and switching off the light in the hallway. He watched her from the edge of the bed until she stood directly in front of him. “C’mon, clothes off, we’re going to bed.” She nudged him. “I’ll be back in a sec.” She disappeared to what he assumed was the bathroom and came out a few minutes later in a t-shirt of her own. She put the one she’d taken off with the jeans he’d left by the bed and pulled back the covers of the bed. She folded her body around him, tucking her knees behind his and pressing her chest to his back. He could feel her warm breath on the back of his neck and her hand curled around onto his chest and for the first time in weeks they both fell asleep straight away. Seren woke on and off through the night to soft caresses and kisses until they succumbed to sleep again. In the early hours, fuelled by a restful night, she felt River curl around her, pressing hard into the soft flesh of her thighs. She rolled onto her back and pulled him to cover her body, pressing her heels into the back of his thighs to guide him into her. It was still so dark in her room that she could hardly see him. She let her hands guide her, trailing up his arms, over his broad back, down to squeeze his thigh, back up and into his hair. He matched with each roll of her hips, slowly and languidly. The darkness made everything quieter, his whispered affirmations, praise and moans were dizzying. Seren clung to him like she never wanted to let go, holding him to her as they both came. When she woke again, she was alone. If it hadn’t been for the ache between her thighs, it could have easily been a dream. 

*

River clattered up the stairs to Lamb’s office with more energy than he’d had in weeks, though his face did not share the same spirit.

“Blimey, you’re positively sprightly this morning. What’s wrong with your face?”

“It’s just my face. Ewelina has walked out on the old bastard.”

“Was she the Polish girl?”

“Yep, he insulted her cooking.”

“How many is that now?”

“He’s gone through eight, I think? He didn’t like Glenys-”

“No one fucking liked Glenys.”

“Or Debbie, Sarah, Pete-”

“What was wrong with Pete?” Lamb asked, incredulous.

“He couldn’t play chess. Shame, he left some decent IPA behind.”

“Is there anyone left?”

“Dunno, guess we’ll have to ask Taverner.” Lamb laughed,

“No, no Cartwright, you will have to ask Lady Di. Not me.”

“Go on Lamb, please? She’ll kill me.”

“While I would pay to see that, I’ll settle for watching you make the call.” He sniggered. With a heavy sigh, River took the outstretched phone.

“Umm, hi? It’s Cartwright? River Cartwright?” Lamb couldn’t hear the other side of the conversation to his disappointment. “Yep, another one. No, he just says they’re all shit. Great, thanks.” He hung up and passed back the phone. 

“Sending someone else?”

“So she says.”

“Y’know Cartwright, I’m quite enjoying the inconvenience all of this is causing for Lady Di. I feel like it’s a bit of vindication for us.” Lamb said decidedly.

The cause of the inconvenience tutted into his coffee, his mind wasn’t playing ball and the crossword was giving him more trouble than he deemed necessary. Outside, he heard a car far larger than River’s arrive, accompanied by a neat knock on his back door.

“David. Seems I have a reason to be here again?”

“Diana, to what do I owe this pleasure?”

“Well the pleasure is certainly not mine, I assure you.”

“Coffee?”

“Hmm,” Diana Taverner looked around David’s kitchen while he pottered around making her a cup of coffee. “You’ve declined another approved carer?” “They weren’t suitable.”

“None of them?” She scoffed. “I do find that hard to believe. You’re becoming a nuisance, David. I’m starting to regret not letting Duffy shoot you.”

“You don’t mean that,” he smiled.

“I actually do. I want this resolved, I want this off my desk, and the next time I hear your name, I want it to be when I find out that you died peacefully in your bed. Do I make myself clear?”

“Perfectly.”

“So what is it you want?” David hesitated.

“I want Seren back.”

“The girl from the barn?” He nodded.

“I got on with her, she understood me. We had an agreement.” Taverner frowned.

“Cartwright, you know she’s not service approved. Our agreement was that you would have someone who was service approved.”

“So employ her? It’s not that difficult, surely?” She drank her coffee in silence. 

“Will it shut you up?”

“There’s a good chance of that, yes.” He held up a finger, “but I don’t want River to know, not until it’s done.”

“That’s making the very big assumption that I’m going to do this for you?”

“You want it off your desk. That’s how it goes.” 

“I don’t like being held over a barrel like this.”

“Should have shot me when you had the chance then.” Taverner laughed,

“Yes, well - touché. Very well. You won’t hear from me again.” She left her half drunk coffee on the table and David went back to his crossword.

*

Seren hadn’t heard from River at all. She sat with Maggie side by side in a brightly lit corridor, like naughty schoolgirls waiting to go to the office.

“I don’t like this.” Maggie grumbled.

“I know, but Daniel and Penny think it’s the right thing for you.”

“We’re coping perfectly fine, aren’t we?”

“Of course we are, but you’ll have a lot more friends here?” She held out a leaflet, “look, they go to senior swim as well? And trips to the cinema and Kew Gardens - you love Kew Gardens.” Maggie huffed.

“I like living in my own bloody house.” Seren didn’t respond. Maggie hadn’t taken the news of moving to a care home well at all. Her daughter and son-in-law were in the office finalising the details of her new ensuite room. “Will you visit me?”

“Of course I will, Mags. Try and stop me.” Seren took Maggie’s hand and kissed the back of it. 

“You’re a good girl, Seren. What will you do?” She shrugged.

“No idea. Maybe a holiday? It’s been a weird year so far.”

“Somewhere sunny. Get that swimming cossie out again.”

“I’m starting to think you’ve got a thing about my cossie, Mags.”

“Maybe in my younger days darling. Don’t tell Penny.” Seren smiled.

“Your secret is safe with me.”

“Mum? Shall we take you to see your room?” Penny emerged from the office.

“I’ll go and have a look at the garden,” Seren told them and then dropped down to talk to Maggie, “be nice!” She warned her. She wandered around the extensive garden of the very exclusive - and expensive - care home. She wondered whether David had gotten the fence painted before the weather had turned, whether the plants they’d chosen were thriving. Her phone rang in her pocket and she pulled it out, the screen still cracked. She really needed to get that fixed. “Seren Harrison?”

“Ms Harrison, I have a call for you from Diana Taverner at Thames House. Can I connect you?”

“Uhh-” Seren’s response was a very undignified stutter and the call was connected before she could accept - or refuse - it. “Hello?”

“Ahh, hello. We weren’t introduced previously. I’m Diana Taverner, I hope you don’t mind my calling?” Seren stumbled over her words and formed some sort of non-committing answer. “Good. I was with David Cartwright a couple of weeks ago, has he been in touch?”

“No, why, what’s happened to him?”

“Nothing at all, more's the pity. He’s been getting through designated home assistance at quite a rate,” Seren couldn’t help but smile at the comment. “It’s becoming very frustrating. Apparently, he will only have you helping him.”

“Me?”

“You got along, did you not?” Seren recalled numerous plates and mugs she replaced but the memory was quickly overruled by ones of doing the crossword, drinking tea in the garden and learning how to play chess.

“We did,” she said softly.

“It seems the ties that bind you both mean a great deal to him. He would like me to make you an offer of employment.” Seren held her breath. “If that is acceptable to you?” Seren could almost hear David’s voice in her ear ‘don’t give in easily, make them work for it’. 

“Well, I’d need to know the terms of the contract, of course.” She stammered. Taverner sighed.

“Yes, yes. I’ll have someone send it over to you by courier. They will wait for an immediate return or dismissal though?”

“I’m sure that’ll be fine.”

“I certainly hope so. I do not want to have to deal with this any longer. I must go, I have a meeting with the Prime Minister shortly. I trust the contract will meet your approval, it’s likely you won’t hear from me again so you have both my admiration and commiserations for managing the Cartwright’s. You deserve a bloody damehood.” Seren nearly laughed at Taverner’s exasperated sigh.

“They’re definitely hard work.” She agreed.

“Indeed. Goodbye Ms Harrison, and thank you.” The call rang off before Seren could respond and from the conservatory, Maggie called and waved to her.

She parked in her usual spot. The revolving door of carers hadn’t bothered with the weeds on the driveway, she noted. She knocked and waited patiently, her hand had barely moved from the woodwork when the door flung open.

“Can I help you?” He asked impatiently. Seren sighed.

“Mr Cartwright, it’s Seren. I umm, well you see -” she tried to think of the best way to explain, the best way to re-introduce herself when she saw the corner of David’s mouth pulling into a smile. “You old git!” She scolded him with a grin.

“Couldn’t help myself my dear.” He beamed. “May I?” He held out his arms and she hugged him warmly. “It’s good to have you back.”

“It’s good to be back. I take it you’ve been quite the troublemaker?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Seren dear. It’s been quite an ordeal, really.”

“Hmm. Why don’t you offer me a proper apology over tea? I brought cake.”

“Coffee and walnut?”

“Of course. Chess?”

“Naturally. Come on in.” Seren followed him into the house, the familiarity of it washing over her. Despite the break in, she felt safe and calm there. They caught up over cake. Seren found that she was no longer angry. Knowing that she was a fully paid up Park employee, David spoke more openly about his past. She knew there would always be things he would keep from her, but he was able to articulate fully what had happened when they’d been in the barn. He told her of his worries about River not sleeping properly, eating junk and his overall desolate attitude.

“I take it he doesn’t know I’m here?” She asked carefully. As he went to respond, the sound of a car turning on the driveway filtered through from the kitchen window.

“I suspect he does now.” He mused as River came to a stop quietly in the doorway.

[keen-li]

STOP YOUR CAR

You're on your way home from a girls night out, you had been drinking but not enough to get you drunk.

You're enjoying your ride back home listen to some music. There weren't many cars in the road and you really wanted to get home quickly so you decided to speed up past the speed limit (don't do this, practice safe driving guys).

Just minutes after you pass the speed limit you see the famous red and blue lights and the sirens. You sigh.

"Stop your car" you hear from the police car.

You turn your car and pull over by a stop near the road. You sit with you hands on your wheel waiting for the cop to pull up by your window.

As you're staring ahead you see a figure approach and stand by your window.

"Y/n?" You hear the cop say, you turn your head and blink taking in the officer standing in front of you. He has a bright light shining in your face.

"Chan?" You say Identifying him by his voice."the light" you say squinting and cover your eyes from the blinding lights.

"Sorry" he says turning it off and putting the light in his back pocket.

You blink and regain your vision. "Chan? Look who passed their test"

Chan was your ex boyfriend from like 2 years ago. You two broke up cause he really never spent time with you cause he was busy training at the academy and you couldn't handle the lack of quality time. And he always seemed to appreciate his work than you.

"Are you drunk?" He asks.

"I'm not" you say. You truly aren't drunk, to you're knowledge atleast.

"Where are you from late at night" he asks his questions to little more casual than he would with anyone else.

"Why do you care" you say sounding bitter. You're still a little hurt from the way your relationship ended.

When your relationship ended he never seemed to care but what he never told you was that you were all he could think about. He thought about you everyday.

"I can see that you're still reckless" he says cheekily.

"Chan why did you pull me over" you ask like you don't know, you were afraid to talk to him for long, cause if you ask anyone you really never got over chan.

"You were going over the speed limit, baby" You smile from the little name. The name always pulled at your heart strings.

"If you're gonna give me a ticket then please do" you say not looking at him and trying to be nonchalant. Chan could always read your emotions like a book and you hates it cause you couldn't hide your feelings from him.

"Y/n,I'm sorry" he says slowly melting your cold persona. He lowers his head in defeat to his emotions.

"I'm really sorry y/n" you can hear the pain in his voice. You didn't want to do this.

"Chan I have to get home"

"We need to talk y/n please"

"You waited for 2 years" you finally look at him and chuckle. You see the look on his face and I breaks you could see he meant it, but honestly you were afraid of being second to his passion so its better if he was only left with one.

"I've thought about you everyday y/n. Everyday" his breathing starts to get heavier.

You stay silent trying to think through your thoughts and make a decision.you really did miss him and understood hjm but it still hurt you.

"Why don't we talk this out" he pleads

"You have work chan"

"That doesn't matter I'm off in 30 minutes anyways" he says as he looks at his watch.

"Is that okay with you baby, can we talk?" His tone and voice is gentle as if walking on eggshells.

You simply nod, truly wanting to talk to him and work through this and maybe the ache that you've had in your heart for the past 2 years would subside.

_________

I remembered I had this in the drafts. I kind of rushed it tho, my bad :)

[springtime-creations]

Longwinded over-explanation as to why I DON'T think these Wanderful PreCure leaks are real or at the very least not be taken as 100% accurate if they are real.

POTENTIAL SPOILER FOR WANDERFUL PRECURE AHEAD!

As someone who's been into PreCure for almost a decade, and has been studying art in an informal setting (self taught artist go brrr) I've noticed some issues with these leaks.

First is obviously the names. Never in the entire history of PreCure have we had a cure whose name lines up with the title. No Cure Smile in Smile, no Cure Suite in Suite, no Cure Fresh in Fresh- you get my point. Cure Wonderful is a highly suspect name, however could still be real as PreCure is always experimenting. Cure Friendy on the other hand is WAY more egregious. Friendy isn't a word, and PreCure isn't known for making mistakes that bad. But it could have either slipped through the cracks OR as these photos look like prototypes that were meant to be destroyed, it's possible Friendy is a typo and she's meant to be Cure Friend, Cure Friendly, or an idea my phone gave me via autocorrect Cure Trendy. Any of which could fit my theorized theme of dog styling or the latter to with a blanket theme of dogs. But they could also be placeholder names. Fake names used to differentiate the characters before they're ready to start publishing their real names.

Secondly is the design. Although I'm not classically trained (see above for self taught artist go brrr) I have a good grasp on art fundamentals via independent study. I was wondering why the designs looked so off to me, and outside of it looking like it was traced off of Aikatsu, I realized that these silhouettes SUCK. Having a strong silhouette is an important aspect of making an identifiable cartoon character. Case and point, a few previous seasons compared with these leaks:

(Pardon the rough nature of the silhouettes, I had to make my own on my phone) without the details, I have no idea what I'm looking at with these designs. With previous seasons, the silhouettes themselves gave us an idea of the vibes or even themes for the upcoming season. Here though? I mean my crappy silhouette of Cure Wonderful made her pigtails look like a cat sitting on her head when I asked my boyfriend for input. These silhouettes are incredibly weak with their long hair basically ruining their design by hiding their dresses. Fun fact! These are the same issues I had with Colgate-chan- oh sorry Alear from Fire Emblem Engage that made me think those were fake too. The minor details were the only thing that separated them from other characters since their silhouette was awful.

Now weak silhouettes aren't always a crime against art, however for a piece of media that is meant to sell toys, is in animation, and for children? Yeah no you need a strong silhouette for the audience to easily identify. The only reason such a weak silhouette would work in PreCure is because no other Cure has one this bland. You can tell which PreCure is Cure Wonderful because "oh that's the least fun looking one". Since her charm comes from the details you can't see when it's just her silhouette, that means that although they're all still cute, they could have been MUCH cuter, which Toei is typically really good at.

So in conclusion, are these definitely fake? I'm not sure. Given these products were probably taken home without permission from the manufacturer, it's possible these leaks are one of three things.

1. An INCREDIBLY well done fake leak, potentially by Toei themselves since they do that sometimes.

2. Real prototypes made with VERY early drafts of the characters and placeholder names that were intended to be destroyed once the designs/names got updated.

3. This is the real deal and this is going to be a fairly weak season in terms of aesthetic.

I'm personally leaning towards 1 or 2 since PreCure usually has higher standards of production. But hey, this is just my theory regarding these leaks. I know one of my girlfriends loves Cure Friendy, and I'm always here for more green rep in PreCure. I'm still excited for this season even if the aesthetic might be a bit weak. If there's anything I've learnt from PreCure, it's that even the most casual of seasons can get real dark real quick and somehow still work. Didn't Cure Grace literally leave someone to die... idk I haven't been able to watch a full PreCure season since like Go! Princess first came out 😭 fuck I'm getting old-

[lustheavens]

For Both Our Sakes part 3 - Vincenzo Ricci x reader

Summary: After everything that happened with your now deceased boyfriend and the fight with your brother Vincenzo the day is finally here to escape the threatening grasp of the Salieri family. Having taken your brother’s advice very seriously to get the hell out of Lost Heaven, you are now minutes away from your goal. However, the mafia always seem to be one step ahead and in this case…it’s your own flesh and blood.

Warnings: Angst.

A/N: Hello! So I finally got around to finish the last part of a previous fic that I made where Vincenzo’s sister was dating Sergio Morello. I really wanted to do my best but at the same time it’s been sitting in my drafts for so long so I kind of just wanted to finally post it. So sorry if it’s a bit rushed 😵‍💫 Anyway, hope you enjoy!

You throw one last look over your shoulder to reassure yourself that nobody has been following you before jumping into the taxi that will take you to Lost Heaven Airport. As you’ve put your seatbelt on you lean closer to the front seat row to make sure the driver hears your properly. “Lost Heaven Airport, please.” You say, the words coming out a bit more rushed than you had hoped. So many things are currently running through your mind making it ten times harder to focus on one thing at a time. “It’s urgent.” You add. The driver nods his head and before you know it you’re being escorted out of the city. You try to get comfortable in your seat hoping to find some kind of consolation in the scenery passing by outside the window. You let out a deep sigh while unconsciously biting on your nails nervously. This will be it. You promised your brother to leave Lost Heaven for good and never come back - that is if you want to stay alive. A part of you can’t help but worry about your brother. What will they do to him? There’s no chance they’d be as ruthless towards him as they would be to you if you got caught, right?

Before your thoughts can wander off any further you are interrupted by the car coming to a stop. “This is your stop, miss.” The cab driver says before exiting the car and opening your door for you. You give him a slight smile before getting out of the car yourself while trying to keep your head low in case someone would recognise you somehow. The cab driver opens the trunk of the car and gets your bags out for you before putting them down on the ground. He looks at you with a polite smile. “The ride has already been paid for. Have a safe flight.” He says before getting back in the cab and driving off. You furrow your eyebrows in confusion for a quick moment before shaking the thoughts of who could possibly have paid for your fare off. You hastily pick up your belongings from the sidewalk and throw another quick glance over your shoulder before making your way into the airport, picking up speed the closer you get. Once inside it almost feels like a relief - almost. It seems like the whole city has decided to travel today which makes the perfect cover for you as you quickly try to navigate to the help desk without coming off as too suspicious.You hastily make your way over to the lady standing behind the help desk, dropping your bag with a thud on the floor. You grab onto the edge of the desk while trying to catch your breath for a moment. The lady looks at you with slight concern. “Can I help you, miss?” She asks, leaning forward slightly. You nod and pull out your plane ticket from your coat before handing it to her. “I’m flying to England. Do you happen to know where I should go?” The stress of someone connected to your brother’s gang possibly having spotted you starts to catch up to you and it takes every ounce of your strength not to throw glances over your shoulder every ten seconds. The lady behind the help desk nods before trying to guide you through gestures. “If you follow this corridor straight and then take a left you should see the exit doors which leads you to the hangars. Big glass doors, you can’t miss it.” You give her a quick nod and a smile before making your way in the direction she showed you.

“Flight 306, destination London, England, now boarding!” You quickly act upon the announcement and get in line to board the plane. You know it’s too early to let out a breath of relief but you can’t help but feel as if maybe there’s a chance of a new start, a completely new life. Considering everything that has been happening lately, and the bare fact that the Salieri family wants you dead, there is absolutely no chance for you to stay in Lost Heaven. And the painful memory of the disappointment in your beloved brothers eyes when you got caught having a romantic relationship with Sergio Morello...

You’re pulled back into reality when the flight attendant asks you for your plane ticket. You quickly pull it out of your coat once again and hand it to him. He clips the edge off before handing it back to you, motioning for you to enter the plane and take your seat. However, the moment you sit down you feel a light tap on your shoulder. You look up and see the flight attendant standing there, motioning over his shoulder with his thumb. “Miss, someone requests your attention.” You try to catch a glimpse of who wants to speak to you but to no use. “Who?” You ask, an unsettling tingle spreading throughout your body. What if Salieri’s men finally caught up with you? The flight attendant shrugs his shoulder. “They wouldn’t say. They only requested to speak to you urgently, in the main building.” You swallow hard and nod before standing up, your legs slowly turning into jelly. “You have 20 minutes before take-off.” You take a quick look around before making your way to the back of the plane where the exit is. With heavy steps you walk down the ladder and make your way back into the airport waiting area, the place still bustling with people. You scan the room carefully as the panic starts to rise. Your breathing gradually becomes heavier and shorter and within seconds your feet start moving on their own, back in the direction of where the plane is waiting for you. You have to get out of here. You promised your brother that you would disappear. Going back now would not only imply a broken promise to Vinny but also to yourself. The only way to get out of this alive is to leave. Now.

You quickly pick up the pace as you hurry along the waiting hall not caring anymore to look if anyone’s following you. Suddenly you feel someone gripping onto your upper arm tightly, pulling you into a secluded room and away from the loud noises and curious eyes. Your breath gets caught in the back of your throat and instantly you start flailing your arms around in a fight-or-flight response. A hand is brought up to cover your mouth as you scream in panic. You can’t figure out who it is since the whole room is pitch black, but you’re certain it’s a man. Despite your protests he starts dragging you along the floor until your back is pushed up against a wall. “Shh, shh, shh...” the man softly hushes you, the slight shakiness in his voice quite prominent. “It’s going to be okay.” You don’t say anything but in a strange way you feel a little bit comforted by the man’s words. Suddenly you hear clicks and clanks when suddenly an ice cold surface presses against your temple sending shivers down your spine. “It’ll all be okay.” The man’s voice cracks and you instantly realise who it is - Vincenzo. Your eyes widen and the panic once again strikes you. “Vinny?!” He hushes you again, this time with a much sharper tone. “Please,” he begs, his voice softening up a little. “Don’t make this more difficult than it already is.” His voice is low och faint, his words coming out as more of a whisper than anything else. He lets go of you before standing up, leaving you a hopeless mess on the ground. Your legs are weak but even so you try to stand up as well, leaning against the wall. You watch as your brother walks across the room in silence, a tear starting to roll down your cheek. “Vinny...” you say more gently this time, his name rolling off your tongue slowly. “What is going on?” you ask, the silence killing you inside. His head hangs low as he squats down, his back still facing you, with his hands covering his face. You hear him take a deep breath before he stands up once again. “I’m so sorry...”

Click, click, bang.

You suddenly feel yourself slide down the brick wall, your breath completely caught at the back of your throat. An incredibly warm sensation spreads throughout your chest but before you can look down to see what’s causing that feeling the world around you becomes blurry, very blurry. You hear rushed footsteps getting closer but even the noises around you starts drowning out slowly but surely. The bullet hit you right in the center of your chest but the adrenaline already running rampage in your system causes the injury to feel less serious than it is. You’re shaken out of your blurry thoughts once you feel Vincenzo grab onto you, his strong embrace holding you as close to him as physically possible. Your eyes meet his gaze which is full of regret. “It’s all my fault.” You mumble in between moments of your consciousness fading in and out. He shakes his head as you catch a tear stream down his cheek. “This would have never happened if I took my responsibility as your big brother.” He says, his voice strained as he fights back the tears that are threatening to fall. “My choices and decisions caused all of this.” You reach one hand up to stroke his cheek with your thumb. You manage to let a slight smile appear on your lips. “And it’s been one hell of a ride.” He looks at you in disbelief, probably thinking you’re crazy for finding humour in anything right now. “You could say that.” His grip tightens around you as he noticed your presence slowly decreasing with each passing second.

“Vinny?” He instantly looks at you, brushing a couple of hair strands off your face. “Do you think I’m a bad person for…you know?” His eyes widen slightly and you can literally sense a piece of him breaking at your question. He keeps brushing his fingers through your hair, faint sniffles escaping every now and then. “I could never. You’re my baby sister and if anyone’s a bad person it’s me for letting all of this happen to you.” More tears roll down his face as he moves one hand over to stroke your cheek instead. You use the last strength in your body to reach up to grab his wrist. “I forgive you.” The words come out as a whisper as the world around you gradually turns white, your eyes closing in the process. “I’m so tired.” You whisper faintly. Vincenzo lets go of the tear stream he’s been trying to hold back all this time once he realises that he’s losing you. He plants a long kiss on your forehead, squeezing his eyes shut as he hears you take your last breath.

“I’ll see you on the other side. I promise.”

[noir-drabbles]

Draft 4

Summary: On the final layer of this frozen lab where no living creature should be, Alban encounters you as you step through the doors, untouched by the temperatures.

(Was playing Cataclysm: Dark Days Ahead and got struck with this little scene. Not complete, obviously, but I got over 800 words out, so I consider that a win! If this was to be a whole short story, it probably be about the Reader counting out how many promises where broken while in that final floor lab cell, and Alban basically being the one to carry the torch of those broken promises, even though the one who made said promises was the same person that gave his little sibling a horrible fate. Reader is not Alban's sibling by the way, but said sibling was involved in Reader's creation. I think.)

And out of the mist, in slow and leisurely steps, came you. Untouched by the frost that covers the walls, you pace through with only an over-sized lab coat to keep you warm.

He raised his gun, because what was he supposed to do when someone seemingly immune to this freezer of a lab pads out of the yawning jaws of wretched open iron doors? Everything that Alban has encountered down here hasn’t been human, why would he start to believe that you were suddenly the exception?

However, he didn’t shoot. When you’re in the lonely hellscape of a world for as long as he has, one can’t help but want to grasp at that small chance of another intelligent being. Someone to talk to and just, have a reminder that one’s not alone. A stupid desire, but it stayed his fingers either way.

“You’re…” and you spoke first, ignoring everything for the sake of focusing on his face, as though that was more interesting than the possibility that your body will be filled with bullets, “You’re not a face I recognize. Are you new? Do you know where everybody went?”

The ease in your tone spoke of confidence in one’s safety. You don’t think he’s a danger to you. And with all the creatures and undead Alban has found, trapped and killed, he probably wasn’t. If a battle broke out, he’d probably be lucky to even keep his torso.

…then, let’s talk. Distract and, perhaps, have a comrade. Or at least a neutral acquaintance.

“I don’t know,” Alban lowered his aim but never put his weapon away. Instead, he pointed to the curled back doors behind you, layer upon layers of metal bent by some unfathomable force. “Did you do that?”

“Hmm?” You turned back and looked around, peering into the darkness before landing on the doors, “Oh. Yes, I did. The power went out a bit ago, so I had to tear my way through. Am I in trouble?”

The look of guilt was gentle, almost afraid. His younger sibling gave him a look like that once, when they scribbled over the carpet with permanent marker. They didn’t know it was a bitch to wash out, in much the same way that you probably didn’t know that you’re not supposed to be tearing doors.

It’s… uncomfortable. Here he is, in a lab that got colder and colder with every sub-floor Alban entered, like whatever these bastards had they wanted to preserve in ice.

“What?” Because what else was he supposed to say?

“Sorry,” you rubbed the back of your neck, “Here, let me see if I can fix them. I didn’t let anyone out, I promise. I was just hungry.”

“Uh, wait wait, you uh,” this was dumb, he shouldn’t be doing this, he should be running, but he’s been alone for too long and dammit, he wanted to know more, “if you’re hungry, then here,” he dug out a protein bar, half-frozen and nearly impossible to bite through, “I got this.”

He’s got more, just in case. It’s a day over it’s expiration date but he’s sure it won’t kill you or anyone. He thinks. He’s not sure. Either way, starving, it’s not a way anyone should go, monster or otherwise. It was something those little kids shouldn’t have experienced.

You perked up with interest and, as much as he’d hate to say it, the innocence–the delicately and deliberately cultivated innocence–was disarming. It felt normal, and for a moment, Alban wasn’t living in a world that was ravaged by a splintering reality. In a world where ice doesn’t flow from the all-consuming black eye in the sky and humans don’t freeze over and break out of their shells as nightmare-ish creatures.

Here, it just felt like Alban encountered a strange person that needed a helping hand as much as he did.

You grabbed it in both hands, your likely stolen lab coat falling from your shoulders, leaving you in a stiff and dirty hospital gown reserved for all lab rats. The ice didn’t affect you, not a single part of you was even dusted in crystals, but even so, Alban dug into his backpack and pulled out a spare parka.

He draped it over your shoulders just as you bit into the bar, bits of it splintering right onto the floor.

“Thank you,” you said after swallowing, wiping at your mouth, “So, who are you, really?”

“Nobody important,” at least not to this lab. He doesn’t know much of this place, and he doubts this lab ever knew of his existence beyond just a name in a family tree. “Just a stranger to this place. My name’s Alban, and I’m just here to find out something.”

A trail of never ending papers and entries, of constant transfers from lab to hospital to another lab, and finally, here. A layers deep laboratory known more as a sarcophagus, a crypt. A place for unstable, and unusable waste.

His sibling was taken here, that’s all Alban knows.

[enruiinas]

PSA: INDEFINITE HIATUS. Long post ahead, so for an upfront tl/dr: blog is currently on an indefinite, possibly permanent hiatus with the exception of affiliate ic interactions.)

Hey, guys! Dropping in with a really overdue update. As you may have noticed, I haven't been doing as much writing here lately, and I think it's officially time I have to come in and admit with being fairly new to the RP scene this past year, I got a bit overzealous and ended up taking on way more than I've been able to keep up with. I feel like I've gotten further and further behind these past few months, and even though I know for a fact most of you do not care how long it takes to reply (I have carefully curated my dash and mutuals circle with this in mind), I cannot seem to get myself past the point of being overwhelmed & feeling bad for taking so long. It's silly, but I think I've stressed about it for so long at this point I cannot get back to the place I want to be with enjoying writing again.

I am not a fan of dropping things. There's nothing that comes into my inbox or drafts I've ever not been excited for and I want to reply to everything. But I think I'm at a point where I'm feeling so bad that there isn't going to be a point of coming back from it. All of that said, I'm extremely sorry to have to do this, but at this time, I've decided to pare things down and go affiliates only for ic interactions for a while. These have been the only things I've been able to work on for a while because they're the most heavily plotted and most ooc-chatted about. Many of you have been incredibly nice and patient ooc and I want to be extremely clear that this is nothing anyone's done and not because of a lack of effort on anyone else's part to plot with/chat with me even when I'm not writing - it is completely a me issue, and I'm so sorry to everyone I've kept waiting for replies both ic and ooc while I've been in this headspace. I'm so grateful to every single one of you for wanting to write and/or chat with me, and I will still be around ooc if you want to stay in contact.

I am hoping that in doing this for a little while, I'll eventually feel like I'm in a better place and not quite as overwhelmed going forward. I still don't like to drop things and will be storing/archiving everything that's still unanswered with the hope of coming back and being able to respond to everything in time, but I think this is going to be a long process and will go ahead and call this an indefinite hiatus on everything outside of affiliate interactions. If you're open to hearing back from me after some time has passed (if I do get back to a good headspace/relationship with writing again), I'm grateful for that as well, but I completely understand if anyone would rather drop mutuals at least for the time being.

[nikki-pondtheauthor]

Howdy Nixxie!

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💗

thank you @oliveofvanders @halfagone @summerssixecho for the tag (sorry it took a while for me to finally answer this reply)

Ngl, most of my fav fics that I've written are the ones that I haven't published yet. But I'll go with the current WIPs posted on ao3 :)

House of Memories (dpxdc, Dick/Danny)

This fic comes to my mind first. I think one of the reasons why I have a soft spot for this one, in particular, is because this is the first fic that I felt I truly succeeded in writing angst. My first MCD fic as well. And I remember I've always wanted to write AU Soulmates for so long and this was the result. Plus I love Dick and wanted to give him more attention. Bonus is that I haven't seen many dpxdc fics where it is set to Dick is Robin.

Legacy (dpxdc, Danny & Jason. Biodad!Jason)

I love Jason. And I also love the thought of exploring Father-Son relationship between Jason and Danny (I'm used to reading deaged Danny, but there's something cathartic writing when it's Danny as a teenager while Jason, in his mid30s, exasperated at his son. That's the dynamic I want to explore) No joke that I immensely enjoy writing about Jason feeling guilty of not being there for Danny (and not knowing he existed). Last I checked, the draft for the next chapter of Legacy is around 4k words (I just havent gotten around editing it). Plus it's set where Jason is Batman, a trope that is not much explored in the dpxdc.

Two of a Kind (dpxdc, Jason & Danny, Halfa!Jason)

I will always be grateful to Kaida for bringing this idea to life of Jason being the second Halfa. I love the idea of Danny having a trusted adult he can come to this time. There's so many I want to gush about this, especially Jason's complicated issues with Vlad. You'll find Jason in this fic interesting because he has different priorities while feeling guilty at the same time. Plus we get some flashbacks (*nods to Red Hood: Lost Days*). Plus I also ADORE where this fic is set to Post-Infinite Crisis.

Dynasty | Loving You Was Like Dancing without Music (ATLA, Sokka/Zukko)

I remember the intense research I did for this fic. I have a separate word doc of writing the history and Fire Nation "legal documents". Even got 3 docs of flashbacks for Sokha, Mai, and Zuko (overall wc: 5k). And the fic is inspired from my fav kdrama show at all times so that's one of the reasons why I enjoy writing this fic.

Danny the Intern (dpxdc, GEN)

Ngl, I debated back and forth with this one because I have mixed feelings about this fic nowadays, but I can never forget the intense planning and outline for this fic and the 2 months I spent writing the buffer chapters just so I could be ahead of this fic. Part of why I enjoy writing this fic is that it's a Case fic. A mystery going on that I'm excited to eventually reveal, which I've been keeping my mouth shut for 11 months now. Currently, ch 6-11 have an overall 13k words. If it goes according to plan, Danny the Intern fic will be updated either this halloween or next month (for the 1 yr anniversary of DtI)

[imminentinertia]

In which I keep a promise to a bunch of people who read a fic five years ago and try to explain why I'm doing that now

In 2018, @vesperthine and I collaborated on run down till the rain delights you and when some people asked for more, we promised a sequel. That didn't happen.

Until now.

Now it's snaking its way to AO3 like an aging Toyota on cold Tromsø roads (I'm really sorry for this silliness but one of the inspo photos we used did this to me).

There's a bit of a backstory:

First of all, you have @nofeartina to blame for run down in the first place and @peacestew to blame for me sliding into the SKAM fandom in 2023 going "hiiii I haven't been in this fandom for years but here's a fic".

In 2018, Tina wanted fisherman!Isak in a knit woolen jumper* and somehow roped V into writing it, and then V somehow roped me into a collab (I'm still entirely unsure how I ended up saying yes), we brainstormed and looked for inspo and wrote some scenes** to see how it went. Fisherman!Isak turned into marine!biologist!Isak with an old fishing boat and a cabin, Even pretended to be suave, the Tromsø area piped up about wanting to be more of a character than a location and there we were:

Gif by @peacestew

It was so much fun writing with V, and we got along so well, so we wrote a short sequel quite soon after. It just needed a few final tweaks.

Then life happened.

Long story short, I haven't heard from Vesperthine since summer 2019. I hope she's happy and well, and I hope she's writing original fiction because she's seriously gifted, and I miss her because she's a very sweet and smart and lovely person. I was left with a nearly finished draft and a hope she'd turn up again. Since then I've turned down requests to translate and podfic run down, and disappointed a few people asking about the promised sequel, because it didn't feel at all right to make those decisions without V's input.

But it's been five years (!!!), I doubt I'll ever hear from her again, that draft is sitting there on my drive, and... so earlier this year I started thinking about just going ahead and posting it. I went through all our notes and figured out what remained to be done (not much, we even had the title ready), and decided to do those tweaks at some point.

Then Peace slid into my notes a while ago (it had been a few years since we were in touch, I love it when old mates show up), we chatted quite a bit and somehow mentioned run down, and I'm entirely unsure how this snowball started rolling but now we're doing an art + fic collab with that sequel. She's been terribly enabling, and dangling pretty gifs in front of me, how could I resist? She even made a gorgeous title gif for run down. V would have been just as happy with this, I'm sure.

Considering that the sequel was just about finished, and V and I never had any actual disagreements while writing (one tiny scuffle about adjectives, we compromised), I think she'd be okay having her name put on the sequel. And I am okay with making that decision, since it's been so long. I've done the final editing, Peace has added her lovely gifs and now I'm just going to work up the courage to post it.

As stupid as I feel giving directions for fic reading I recommend you read (or re-read, bless everyone who has read it) run down till the rain delights you first, I'm not sure the sequel will make much sense otherwise.

the roll of the harbour wake is coming soon to a fic archive near you. Peace and I hope you will enjoy it.

Gif by @peacestew

*the fic was almost immediately nicknamed The sweater fetish fic. Drooling over the guys in knit woolen jumpers kept happening for ages.

**the first scene we wrote didn't actually make it to run down, but we put it in harbour wake, and it goes to show that sometimes a fic takes a very different direction from where you start it.

[sun-aries]

Heat

This WIP has been sitting in my drafts forever and it’s still not finished but maybe some of you will get a kick out of it. Rated T for suggestive themes. Enjoy!

Heat. It embodied the room that blissful summer afternoon, where the sunbeams fired through the glass windows and cast the queen's study in an idyllic golden glow. Closing the curtains was little to no respite, for there was little light without the hearth burning, and so they opted to leave them open, sacrificing any chance of cold for the light needed to get through their planning.
With the wedding only weeks away, it was crucial for the young couple to go over the plans. Though there were more than a dozen staff working to ensure their wedding ceremony and reception were worthy of royalty, Zelda and Link needed to approve every little detail, from the greenery in the centerpieces to the inlays of dishware and the embroidery of the napery. Though Zelda was well-versed in such drab subjects, Link could hardly care, finding that the heat of the room matching with the utter boredom of the topics made it hard to focus.
Instead, he found himself looking at her. A bead of sweat formed at her hairline, trickling down her temple, heading for her jaw before her hand intercepted. It was swept away by her index finger, dressed in satin gloves, and he absently wondered how she wasn't boiling. She always wore what must've been pounds of cloth, dressed properly and sitting primly, but he hadn't ever thought about what a nuisance it would be on such a hot and heavy day. Not that he was one to talk particularly, dressed in layers beneath his simple tunic, but he reasoned that he was more immune since traversing under the desert's sun.
"Given the surplus of blue samples Chancellor Foster has given me, I'm inclined to believe he has a preference. It is the color of our crest, after all, but I personally admire the simplicity of the ivory," Zelda said, flipping through the square samples of satin. "What do you think?" Receiving no response, she turned to look at her fiancé. She found him staring at her, eyes dazed and lips parted just a little, and she knew he was lost in thought. Her lips twitched as she tried to suppress an amused smile and she shook her head. "Link."
He startled at the sternness of her voice. "Huh?"
"Have you listened to a word I've said?"
"Oh…yeah, something about blue, I think." The queen rose a brow. "I'm sorry. It's just hard to focus…It's so hot. Aren't you hot?"
She placed the samples on her lap and sighed. It was a bit bothersome, the heat, but she typically forged ahead. Hazarding a glance out the window behind them, she squinted at the blinding sunlight pouring in. "Yes, it is quite hot."
Resigned, she gathered her long hair and swept it over her shoulder, inadvertently revealing the stretch of bare skin from her jaw, to her elegant neck and shoulders up until her pauldrons. 
Link tensed, his fists clenching around the hem of his tunic. His eyes were hyper-focused on Zelda's neck, watching another bead of sweat travel down the length of it, down towards her collarbone. He ached to reach out, to sweep it away with his tongue.
It disappeared down the neckline of her dress and it was then that his eyes met hers again. Suddenly, he realized how intently Zelda watched him watching her, and though he was flustered by it, he was locked in on her gaze. He thought he would die if he didn't touch her right then.
"I don't suppose you'd mind if I..." She paused, reaching for the hem of her gloves.
His eyes followed the movement, widening upon realization. Then, shaking his head, he tried to say, "No," but his mouth had gotten dry and it came out embarrassingly hoarse.
There was a flicker of a smile on her lips, perhaps of trick of the light, before she started to peel the glove off. When they got bunched up at the elbow, he habitually reached out to help before he froze, fingers twitching, hot and flustered with the thought of taking her clothes off. It was a measly glove, for goddesses sake, but it made him blush anyways.

[soulless-angel25]

Finally going ahead and posting this, it has sat in my drafts for several months so... warning: there is a lot of swearing. I remember that orginally I planned for this to cover all of season one but just episode one became very long so...

(sorry for the slight rant in advance)

I always get pissed off when people call Rose a crybaby or a whiner or say that she wasn't that good and X companion was better.

Like what do you expect???? She is 19. 19. Do you expect a fucking 19 year old human girl who works in a shop to be this amazing perfect can-do-no-wrong person????

When we're introduced to Rose she is a 19 year old shop girl who is stuck in this daily routine that she can't get out of. And then, suddenly the world is so much bigger then she ever thought it was before! She meets this amazing man who takes her hand and says 'run'. And when they're in the lift instead of crying or breaking down she tries her damn best to rationalize the situation. When the mannequins start moving her first thought is that it's a prank, because why wouldn't she? Why would she for any reason think that it's alien? And then she starts to panic a bit, yeah. Who wouldn't?

Do you think he could keep a mostly cool head whilst all of that shit was going on? Do you think you'd be able to not break down into a mess?

And then, when she's cornered. A man appears, takes her hand and saves her. But the moment they're in (relative) safety she is immediately asking questions, coming up with theories about what's happening. [ROSE] Very nice trick then, who're they? Students? Is this a student thing or what? [DOCTOR] Why would they be students? [ROSE] I don't know! [DOCTOR] Well, you said it. Why students? [ROSE] 'Cause... to get that many people dressed up and acting silly, they got to be students. She is trying to rationalize, she is coming up with ideas. Talking to the Doctor and he's like, 'Yes, but why do you think this?' And she answers! She just saw him rip and arm off when of those things, and after this interaction she's told her boss is dead.

Then they're outta the lift and she's interrogating him. Because now she has questions, and she wants answers. And the Doctor, is the person who has them. Then she's being told to get out and then her job is blown up!

I think, compared to anyone who could've been in that situation that she did a remarkable job! But, then her life just, dips into a light semblance of normal. Mickey's over, her mum's on the phone. And she has a cuppa and is staring off. And the next day comes 'round, her alarm goes off but her mum reminds her that she's got no job to go to so no reason to get up. The cat flaps rattling and so she goes to check it out and there's the Doctor. The person who has answers.

He comes in, she starts on tea, he nearly gets strangles by the plastic arm. He leaves and she goes after him, determined to get answers. And the two banter back and forth, 'Who are you? / Told you, the Doctor. / Yeah, but Doctor What? / Just the Doctor. / The Doctor?' But then he's explaining it to her, telling her roughly what's going on and she's trying to piece together the information that she's being given. The Doctor does his whole, turn-of-the-earth speech and tells her to forget him.

But that isn't where it stops, later on Rose is searching. Trying to gain more information on the Doctor, and she gets a lead. She goes to investigate it, despite the dangers it might pose. Sure, she decides the man is a nutter but that doesn't mean that his words still don't stay with her. No matter who small. And then the Doctor is back, he's crashing her date, taking her boyfriend's head off and she goes with him because the plastic replica of her boyfriend is trying to murder them. (tbf i'd go to) Then, she's in the TARDIS.

She plainly says that it's alien, the Doctor agrees. Then she says 'are you alien?' and the Doctor says, 'yes. is that all right?' and simply replies with 'yeah.' LIKE, she's so chill about it. This man that she's had maybe 3 interactions with is an alien and she's just kind of like 'ok.' But then Rose is crying and the Doctor thinks it's cause the TARDIS and him are alien but it's because she doesn't know if Mickey is safe.

Then they're out of the TARDIS and trying to find where the Consciousness is, and the Doctor's like 'well, it has to be somewhere big! A giant circular metal disk, must be completely hidden' and Rose is just looking behind him at the London Eye and it takes him a bit to realize and then he's grinning saying 'fantastic'. Before you know it the two of them are running, holding hands.

Then they've found the underground base and hey! Mickey's alive. Then the Doctor is trying to negotiate but then the mannequins find the anti-plastic and there goes Rose. With her bronze in gymnastics, with her no future, no life, no a-levels. But she's got her bronze is gymnastics and she saves the Doctor.

Next thing you know, the three of them are out, alive. Mickey exiting the TARDIS first, then Rose with the Doctor standing in the doorway. And he asks if she wants to come along.

You can see her consider it for a moment before she looks at Mickey, who's clinging to her legs like a child. And she says no. She says no and he looks disappointed but accepts it. He goes into the TARDIS and she vanishes. Rose clearly regrets her choice but she's already made it and is walking away but then the TARDIS is back, the Doctor is back and says 'did I mention it travels in time?' and she doesn't look back, she says thanks to Mickey who says 'for what?' and she says 'exactly' before running on.

That entire episode not once do you see Rose cry or break down except when she thinks Mickey is dead.

[pearthery]

will there be more chapters for your potpurri au? no pressure, just curious!

hopefully one day!!! i did have a ginzura-themed draft set in the potpourri au (it's still there ahaha i just haven't added to it in a long while) which was titled something like actually the strawberry flavour in your strawberry milk is really just sugar and red dye. i only got so far as ginzura bullying haggard old man hasegawa-san before i lost the plot of it but i aim one day to finish it!!! actually here is a snippet ahaha

After a long day at work ferrying customers back and forth through the endless streams of urban traffic, Taizou slams shut the driver's door to his cab, rolls his shoulders back and his head up, and then nearly bursts into tears. 

"Please stop sitting there," he begs to the demon perched on the wall outside his house. "Please. It gives me a heart attack." 

Yoshida-san's devil child, the one that the man dotes on incessantly, the one that likes to wheedle snacks from Taizou's sweet, innocent wife, the one that has tormented Taizou relentlessly without him even lifting a finger at least three times a week ever since their paths had tragically crossed, stares down dolefully. 

"Hatsu doesn't mind," says Gintoki. "Besides. What's it my fault if pathetic old men die early? An old man who dies from something as lame as a heart attack is like a piece of dog crap stinking things up on the boot of society. An old man who dies from a heart attack is probably dying from something else already anyway, like crappy convenience store cigarettes or the weight of their own failures or their sunglasses leeching out all of their braincells like a cursed object."

"That's Hatsu-san to you," says Taizou, for lack of anything else. 

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anyway, old men like that are already like zombies anyway. Even if they die, they'll still get up and go back home and leech off Hatsu." Gintoki pinches around the outsides of his nostrils thoughtfully, probably in search of stray boogers.

Taizou drags his hands down his face. He heaves a large sigh. His blood pressure has been climbing upwards for years at this point. "Aren't you too old to be doing things like this? Don't you have to get home? Don't you have anything better to do? Don't you have too much homework to be bullying poor, working men just trying to get by? God help me." 

"Pft," says Gintoki, twelve years old and mean as hell. "As if God would listen to dog crap like you." 

ooo

The first thing to ask, obviously, is why Gintoki is here.

"It's because he's run away from home again," explains Katsura-kun, politely letting himself into the kitchen through the back door. He gestures over at Gintoki (rifling through Taizou's refridgerator shelves for sweet treats) and beams at Hatsu (heading out to the garden) when she pats him on the head, even though the kid's almost as tall as she is now. 

"Yeah," says Gintoki. He settles down at the table with a cup of chocolate mousse. 

Taizou gazes wearily at the scene. 

"Don't just come into my house like that. Who even invited you? And you. I was going to eat that. I was going to have that for dessert tonight." 

Gintoki's eyes go wide and he makes a noise of surprise. "Hm? Oh, this l'il thing? Sorry. It just looked so lonely in the back of your fridge. I thought I'd keep it company. Anyway, I'm a growing boy, so I need all the sugar I can get." 

"I put it up at the front so I could take it out for dessert. I was really looking forward to that."

"It's probably better that you don't eat too much sugar anyway, old man," Gintoki adds. "I heard too much sweet stuff is bad for geezers."

"You know what. Fine. Go ahead," says Taizou.

"If you're hungry or peckish," says Katsura-kun, "then I'm not sure Hasegawa-san's pantry is the best place. It would really have been better for you to stay home and let Yoshida-san stuff you with, what's that he's been baking a lot recently? I think they were lemon rosemary cookies." He pauses and looks to his left, where Gintoki nods absently into his chocolate mousse. 

"Yes, that's right. Lemon rosemary shortbread cookies. They were quite good actually. Yoshida-san gave me a container to take home. I stopped by their house after school, that's why," he says to Taizou, whose expression must be showing the confusion bouncing around his brain. "He even sat me down to discuss the symbolism of the ingredients he used. He said: half a cup of sugar for the sweetness of existence, half a teaspoon of vanilla extract, a quarter of a teaspoon of salt for the tears shed in existence, a cup of butter, smooth and slippery, like all the things that slip out of your grasp—"

"Hey, what do you mean my pantry's not the best place?," says Taizou after a moment of realisation. "I work hard to feed myself and my wife, you know that, you brats? This whole day I was driving around rude, shithead city people who smoke in my cab and spill disgusting sticky soft drinks on my seats, and this is what I come home to?" 

"You're the shithead who smokes in your cab," says Gintoki. "If your car smells like smoke, then that's because you're stinking it up in the first place, so it's your own fault."

"Are you really a little kid?" says Taizou. "Why do you have such a crude mouth for a kid? Why is everything you say so mean?"

"Hey, you're the one who said 'shithead' in the first place. I'm just repeating what you said. I'm an impressionable young boy, so you should be watching your mouth, actually. You should be a good role model." 

"Don't your neighbours smoke? I see Tatsugoro-san with his pipe around all the time, are you this mean to him? Are you this mean to Ayano-san? You aren't, are you? You're only this mean to me. I'm the only one you call a pathetic old man, aren't I? I'm the only one you unleash all of your insults on, aren't I? You only call me dog crap on the boot of society." 

"—two cups of all-purpose flour, soft and bright, for all the things that are so delicate that they can be blown away in a single breath, rosemary for fidelity and remembrance, oh Gintoki, what have I done that I don't deserve your fidelity, oh Gintoki, remember me, won't you Gintoki, wherever you have gone to, away from me, preserve the memory of me in your soul, even when you so evidently can no longer stand to look at my face—"

"Shoyo has a dumb face," says Gintoki to Katsura-kun. "And I'm just going to stay at your house for a week or two. I go to your house all the time."

"Well, you forget that Yoshida-san is possessed by a thousand spirits of melodrama," says Katsura-kun. "Also, lastly, lemon for bitterness. That said, I have a container for you as well, Gintoki."

Gintoki wrinkles his nose. "I don't want it, thanks." 

"I'll take it," says Taizou, having been demolished by a middle schooler. "I need a pick-me-up." The container is swiftly slid across to him. "Thanks."

He opens the lid to find resting on top of the pile of warm biscuits a small square note embossed with spiky leaves around the edge. It's covered with pen drawings of hearts and sad faces and reads: FOR MY STINKY LITTLE SWEETPEA WHO IS ALWAYS WELCOME TO COME BACK HOME AT ANYTIME HE DECIDES TO RETURN HOME MOST HOPEFULLY SOON. <3.

"I wonder what Hatsu's doing outside," says Taizou. If he arches his neck, he can glimpse through the window. She's tending to the flowerbeds, it looks like. She pulls out a couple of weeds. Katsura-kun looks as if he knows exactly what is contained in Gintoki's care package (kid probably watched the note be written) and is politely ignoring it. Gintoki's face is very bland.

"Looks like there's some paper in here. With some writing on it. And some little pictures." He takes a bite out of what really is a good biscuit, sweet and buttery and still warm. Yoshida-san seriously is a good baker. "So these are kind of like fortune cookies, yeah?"

"Huh, says Katsura-kun. "I didn't get anything in mine."

"Huh," says Taizou, with maximum discretion. "Weird. Maybe something happened at the fortune cookie factory and they had a mix-up. Welp, since I'm an old geezer and I've had enough of both sorts 'a fortune, good or bad, in my lifetime, I guess you kids can have mine."

Silently, he folds up the note. Gintoki's hand is already open and outreached, though he refuses to look at it. Underneath that note is another one, which is a mournfully calligraphed poem about the temporary nature of happiness and domestic bliss that has additionally been annotated. He passes that one over as well.

"Anyway, Katsura-kun," he continues, "what was that recipe? Can you say it again, or maybe write it down? Hatsu might like it. She's mentioned wanting to try her hand at baking these days." 

[komilys]

After a several weeks of being dead, I'm back! And since you said that you don't mind me crashing into your inbox...

First of all, you and Ciel are really cute together. Hopefully you will be able to stir him up and get him to have some fun... You two seem to represent that kind of "troublesome guy x unfortunately has to deal with them" ship dynamic that I always loved.

But now I wonder, what other canon events would have gone differently with your s/i in it? Especially since Ciel and Sebastian decided to use your s/i for his knowledge of canon events (even if it barely helped). You also mentioned that lately you've been thinking a lot about the current arc, so what about that?

And it's kinda funny how both of us have our Black Butler s/is isekai-ed into their world from ours. I also got this idea from similar "x reader" fanfiction I was reading a long time ago.

Except my s/i ended up getting adopted (kinda) by Undertaker instead, and later was too busy working in the funeral parlour and slowly slipping into the madness to influence the plot...

Anyway, about your s/i again. How does he look? Do you have any drawings or picrews or just written description? Asking just so I could picture you and Ciel together.

– villain-in-love

(it deleted my first response. that sucks.) after weeks of ME being dead, i’m back n ready to answer!! :3 (im so sorry i keep dying)

thank you thank you!! that really does capture our dynamic perfectly i think <3

funny you mention your s/i being adopted kind of by undertaker bc i’ve been playing with a similar idea! instead of adoptee, it’s more kidnapee-but-not-really. he was already suspicious of komie, what with ciel just appearing one day with him and even more so by the fact that he always seemed to be five steps ahead of everything, like he always knew what was next. at first he dabbled with the idea of something supernatural, but i think at the end i’ve been toying with the idea of him ‘kidnapping’ komie during the whole blavat sky thing (that arc) but honestly im still not very sure what with the manga still going.

kidnapping in quotes because it’s not so much as kidnapping as me more or less willingly going with him, though originally that was the first draft, i switched to pinning komie’s departure from ciel’s side to his own selfishness. undertaker did have a part in his convincing to leave though.

i’ve been thinking a lot about the current arc trying to figure out how komie ties into it, whether having him be an active player as he’s always been or kind of just sitting on the sidelines watching everything play out for once. this is also in part due to that i really have no idea how the manga is gonna play out, i kept flip-flopping between being with r!ciel and lizzy (in my universe lizzy and i are close), and being wherever undertaker is, (essentially switching me always following ciel to me following him).

yeah, the current arc is messy for komie i don’t know what im doing with myself yet (￣w￣;)

that’s quite funnu though! that both of our inserts have both been just dropped in the story! i’m curious on what you mean by too busy descending into madness ??

the emerald witch arc (the next one to be animated, hooray!!!) is the last arc i have more or less thought out well (all my self ships are more or less thought out, lol)

i think komie ends up taking a lot more of a caretaker role for ciel, and he’s also a lot more careful with him during the emerald witch arc. at first he stops ciel from going into the forest too, because at this point he’s very fond of ciel and doesn’t want him to hurt, but at some point he does push ciel to go into the forest as he’s meant to.

like how finny takes care of ciel, komie also does as he’s more like a kid. at this point, guilt starts to creep up on komie because he just has to let bad things happen to the people he’s grown to care for and he becomes a little detached (this leads into the next arc, similar to lizzy). at some point between these two arcs, i think ciel and ki have a moment and for a little, ki goes back to the same but i think it’s a quick regression to his state during the witch arc.

speaking of witch arc, i remember i had an idea that i kill someone (one of the german women who tried to kill wolf, but id have to reread the arc to actually flesh that out… i forgot what happened…)

also funny ! sometime before the actual start of the green witch arc / during the public school arc, ciel finds out komie’s actual age— lizzy was trying to find out my birthday, lo and behold i admit my eighteenth was a month ago. ciel just goes quiet and looks at me— he genuinely didn’t believe i was that older than him.

its a funny moment, lizzy’s sad i didn’t tell her during easter, edward has his head in his hands— his mind is running crazy— he’s like oh!, and ciel is just staring. he blushes a little. anyways komie is just like sry gang (victorian version)

for the visuals of komie i have these 2! the first’s purpose is mostly to get a feel for the dressing/how he dresses + hair and the second is for the more actuate body type :3 obviously i dress very differently given… 1800s… but it’s a good representation of how i looked when i landed in the phantomhive garden in the first place (also my pajamas)

but if you want a kind of not really… more accurate to the kind of clothes i switch to wearing once actually in the 1890s, that’s the third picture (a little plain, it’s probably be more detailed / different in reality but just a vague idea! the general idea is more coverage lol)

something i thought of but i thought it’d be cute if during that shopping ciel has with the phantom servants post-school arc, he asks if i want anything and i shrug and say, “a blanket? i don’t really use the bed coverings i have at the manor”

“…you don’t?”

“no, i don’t really… the way they feel is…” i squint, making a vaguely grossed out noise.

ciel stares, before averting his gaze towards the shelves.

“how is this one?”

we go back and forth for a while, having me go through the different fabrics and try to explain how they are and the differences as he gauges my reactions. it’s embarassing because i can tell he doesn’t really get it, but he also doesn’t relent. we leave and i get a new blanket. a few weeks later, a little before the trip to germany— i find a few new clothes on my bed.

“ciel?” i examine the neatly wrapped package. its green. i look back up at him from the doorway across the room. “what is this?”

“clothes,” he doesn’t look up from his paperwork. “you were uncomfortable before, weren’t you?”

“sometimes,” i answer.

his pen stops. “now you won’t be.”

i stare at him, the quiet scratching of his pen being the only sound filling the air between us. that’s kind of you, but i don’t say it.

“oh…” i turn the package around in my hands. did he have sebastian wrap it? “thank you.”

“you’re welcome.”

x <3