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#this has been on the back burner for over a week ToT
bugprinz · 2 years
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mother i got attached to the antagonist again.
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harryandmolly · 4 years
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fear and loathing in mandeville canyon *6*
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summary: Shawn & Lilly, derailed, detoured, but maybe not destroyed
warnings: language, not all fluff is fluffy (ya feel?), a chapter pic that walked into my hands and curled up and fell asleep
wc: 3.7k
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Lilly’s eyes slide shut. There’s no fighting it now, not when he’s kissing her throat like this, mouthing at her like a melting ice cream cone.
She kind of feels like one. It’s summer in Southern California, even though it’s May. They’ve started sharing Lilly’s balcony bedroom and can’t agree on whether to keep the doors open when they sleep. She still gets weird about the bird that flew in and woke them up that one time by shitting on her yoga mat. He likes the nature sounds, though. It reminds him of Pickering even more than his place in Toronto does. They’re not actually secluded out here but it feels like it sometimes, in a nice way. 
It also doesn’t help, he supposes, that every mosquito in LA county finds a way to get under their sheets and bite her, and only her, when they leave a door or window open for airflow. He tells her it’s because she’s so sweet. She swears at him.
She won the battle last night, so the doors and windows are closed. The air is stagnant. In such an old house, the central air isn’t great. They’ve kicked all their sheets off and are down to their underwear. He likes the way her skin tastes a little salty-sweaty. 
He’s not after anything other than holding her. In the few weeks since they’ve started back up again, their sex life has been borderline out of control. Shawn is chalking it up to lost time.
He likes the way she sighs and slips her fingers into his hair like she’s resigned to his attentions. He keeps his hands north of her underwear, conscious of not making her feel like she’s merely an outlet. He’s just… happy. He could count on two hands the number of nights they got to sleep in the same bed before they broke up. This is the height of luxury for him.
Shawn murmurs contentedly into the column of her neck. “Your skin’s so soft,” he whispers, skimming his nose beneath her jaw, “How do you get it like that?”
She giggles. He’s on fire, pleasantly burning.
“You saw my truckload of sheet masks. They’re not for decoration.”
Shawn pulls his head up, flipping his curls out of his eyes. He overdoes it, still used to having a lot more hair than he does now. She smooths it away for him.
“I’ve been bad lately,” he confesses, wrinkling his nose, “I ran out of the stuff Anna gave me like a month ago. And I do sheet masks a lot more when we’re touring, being on the bus and shit.”
Lilly looks crestfallen. Shawn lifts his brows in question.
“The only reason I’m in bed with you is to steal your outrageously expensive skincare.”
Her convincingly innocent expression goes impish so fast he’s glad he didn’t blink. He grunts and skims his teeth against her jaw as he laughs, swatting at her ass.
“Are you gonna share your masks or what?”
Ten minutes later, he has one of her terrycloth headbands pushing his hair back and Lilly almost sitting on his bare chest as she carefully presses the slick sheet to his face. She taught him how to make little cuts along the forehead, eyes, lips and jaw to fit it to your face best. It’s still too small for his giant head, but Lilly’s determined.
“There,” she declares, scooting back over his ribs. Shawn lifts his hands to her thighs, rubbing them softly as he watches her apply her own, expertly snipping the center of her nose flap to fold it up and out of the way of her piercing.
Shawn shuts his eyes and lulls himself further into this intoxicating calm with her.
“What’re these supposed to do?”
“Brighten, boost collagen, support cell turnover.”
Lilly flops on her back beside him. She nestles into the sheets and groans like they haven’t been lying in bed all day. She sneaks her fingers in between his. His nose twitches as he tries not to smile and fuck up his mask.
He rubs his thumb against the back of her hand.
Her whisper is quiet, strained. “Stop making me smile, you’re going to fuck up my mask.”
+
It’s Shawn’s turn to make breakfast. So, eggs.
Lilly swings her legs against the counter as she sits across from him, curating a playlist because you know when you just wake up and it’s a Beach Boys morning?
Apparently it’s a Beach Boys morning. Shawn has no arguments. Even if he did, he’s too distracted to voice them. It’s arriving today, all of it. As much of a professional recording studio as can be packaged and very carefully, very expensively delivered to their rental. Lilly’s been trying to keep him engaged since they woke up, they even braved taking their first masked walk around their neighborhood. Apart from the possibility of a rogue and well-hidden phone camera, he thinks they made it out without being spotted. As far as Shawn can tell, the internet thinks he’s in Toronto. He’s comfortable keeping it that way.
Turns out even aside from worming back into Lilly’s life, LA was a good idea. His team came up with a whole plan to keep him busy and keep him recording, but it would’ve been much harder to execute if he were a country away. He has Zoom sessions with producers lined up and instruments being tracked at other home studios, all the ones he can’t do himself, anyway. Now he just needs the equipment.
Shawn is folding spinach, mushrooms and onion into what he hopes is omelet-shaped eggs, kind of, sort of, when his phone buzzes hard against the granite.
“Ohmygodthey’rehere,” he hisses, barreling toward the front door without shutting off the burners, leaving Lilly swearing at him in his wake.
The proceeding half hour of large, larger, and largest Pelican cases being hauled into the living room is torture. It’s like if you had to watch your mum and dad bring all the presents from downstairs and stack them strategically under the Christmas tree before you got to rip them open. Once the delivery guys leave, they spend another half hour wiping down every square inch of the case surfaces with Clorox and taking stock of the equipment.
Shawn looks to Lilly, pained and squirming. She snorts.
“Go for it, champ.”
Shawn descends, Lilly close behind him. In another two hours, they spread everything out on the floor in relative chaos and exhaust themselves to the point of near panic.
Shawn scrapes his hands over his face and into his hair, grabbing at it to ground himself. “We just… I dunno, we gotta call Andrew or Teddy or somebody, we can’t do this alone, it’s too much.”
Lilly sits on her knees in front of a case full of long polls on stands that he can’t remember the name of. She makes a sour face and her high ponytail bobs against her cheek. His stupid sentimental heart swells.
“I hate it when you make me the positive one. Shawn, it’s fine. We need food, we need coffee, we need a strategy, this is fine. This is fine!” Her pitch rises noticeably at the end of her short pep talk. It’s distractingly anxious.
Shawn looks around hopelessly at the thousands of dollars of equipment strewn across the living room floor until she drags him by the wrist into the kitchen. They pass on their now sad and definitely burnt omelet and order from Eggslut, promising each other that they’ll have Sweetgreen salads for dinner.
Back on the floor, barefoot and hungry, they toss ideas back and forth between bites of brioche egg sandwiches. By the time the tater tots are gone, Shawn is off the ledge, coaxed slowly and with care (and carbs). 
The plan is, essentially, a giant blanket fort. Since the living room is at the back of the house away from the street and the pool, it’s nice and quiet, but they need absolute silence for a clean track. They scout out a cozy corner, working around the baby grand, with enough room for the mics and recording equipment, plus a couch for Lilly if she promises to be very quiet.
“Ok so if we get the C-stands up around eight and a half feet, that should clear the mics,” Lilly declares, dragging sound-deadening furni pads out of another case.
Shawn’s head falls back. “C-stand. That’s it. Shit, I couldn’t come up with it earlier.”
Lilly winks and begins sorting them by size. Shawn turns to a case of C-stands and plucks one from a folded bunch. Within 25 seconds, he’s struggling, kicking at the legs and turning dials that don’t seem to do shit.
Lilly’s little hands appear in his view as she gently handles it, demonstrating the way the legs swing out and the stand rises. 
“You’re so handy,” he praises teasingly, slipping his fingers between hers. She willingly releases the stand and slides around behind him, shrugging her arms around his stomach. He tries to peer at her over his shoulder and wonders if she can feel the way his pulse increases.
“Sorry, did you say ‘handsy?’” she murmurs, pushing her fingers beneath the elastic of his gym shorts. He holds his breath, muscles tensing everywhere. Just as soon as she’s there, suddenly she’s gone, nibbling away at his shoulder blade as he whistles an exhale through his nose. He chuckles and turns in her arms.
“Guess I gotta be the brains and the braun on this one,” Lilly says, lifting onto her toes and pecking his lips. Shawn grunts, looking to hold her a little longer, but she squirms away.
Lilly got her Beach Boys after all, on the house speakers at an almost egregious volume. They continue working, stringing up furni pad “walls” on C-stands and gathering extra throws and rugs from around the house. The problem is the fort’s ceiling.
“We can suspend them from the chandelier, as long as some of the weight still rests on the walls. But how do we get up there, can you reach? No. Wait-- no, no, is there a ladder? There has to be a ladder,” Lilly rants, turning circles beneath the chandelier until Shawn intervenes, catching at her arm.
“I’m your ladder.”
Lilly blinks, then squints. “Terrible plan.”
Shawn balks. “Great plan!”
“What, you’re gonna lift me? For minutes on end? It’s going to take a while.”
“You can sit on my shoulders. And that way I can keep you company,” he quips with a crooked grin. He likes the way his smile makes her smile.
“Shawn, no, you haven’t even been working out recently, and--”
Her realization of her own mistake takes over her face. Now that she’s made it sound like she doesn’t think he’s capable, he won’t leave it alone until she lets him prove it. She sighs.
“I can do it, Lill, you’re really not heavy. C’mon, I can always put you down. It’ll be fine!”
She cringes. “Famous last words, Mendes.”
Shawn corrals her with confidence and kisses until she’s sitting on the edge of the bar counter with her legs out as Shawn crawls beneath her and into position with her thighs on his shoulders. 
“Three… two… one…,” Shawn grunts, ignoring Lilly’s persistent “oh god, oh god” muttering under her breath. He uses his lower body to press himself to stand. Lilly squeaks a little, clenching her legs tightly against his chest. He squeezes his hands on her quads with a little laugh.
“Told you. Did you seriously think I was gonna fuckin’ drop you?”
“I didn’t think you’d mean to,” Lilly mutters. She tugs once at his curls and presses into him again, giving him a feel for just what all those tree poses were for.
“Giddy up.”
One step at a time, they waddle beneath the chandelier. Lilly hooks up the loops she ingeniously sewed onto the furni pads to heavy duty Command hooks and sticks them up to the ceiling, one by one. The final pad goes up and the world goes dark.
“Oh my god,” Lilly breathes.
Shawn exhales. “We fuckin’ did it.”
Lilly lets out a squeak and smacks at his chest. “High five me!”
“I can’t see you!”
With a final uncoordinated scramble, Shawn kneels and Lilly stumbles off his shoulders. They fall into a puddle, enclosed in the quiet darkness.
“Thank you,” Shawn whispers, reaching out to touch whatever he finds. It happens to be her belly, where her shirt has ridden up. Her abs contract. He fights a goofy smile, even in the dark.
“I knew it was important to you.”
Shawn seeks her out. He can’t help it. He wriggles around until his head replaces his hand on her stomach, and links their fingers.
“I need to ask you something.”
Shawn looks up where her face should be in the blackness. He nods.
“How… many songs are about her? I just need to prepare myself for it.”
Shawn wishes he could see her face now. He thinks her voice is steady, but he can always read her face better. Whatever it is, it’s always in those big blue eyes.
“A lot,” he says honestly, “I went on a writing spree when we first got together. It was confusing, I think, because there was so fuckin’ much going on in my head. But writing about her helped… I dunno. I think it distracted me from how I still felt about you.”
He feels her swallow, but doesn’t hear it. The panic starts to rise, pushing him to keep talking.
“I don’t know what recording these songs is gonna feel like, Lill. I’m scared there isn’t gonna be any life in them. Because I don’t feel those things anymore. That’s why I left.”
Lilly sits up. Shawn’s head slides into her lap. His pulse is in his ears. He’s sick to his stomach.
“How do I know you didn’t say the same fucking thing to her when you left me?”
There’s no anger in it, just hurt. Shawn sits up, shaking his head, even though he knows she can’t see.
“Lill, please, I’m sorry. I really am. Fuck, I know it’s… it’s shitty. I can’t pretend to get it from your side. And I really don’t want to hurt you again.”
Her huff is aggravated, but she’s not running. He clings to hope.
“Well, it’s gonna hurt, Shawn, there’s kind of no getting around that if 90% of your album is ‘I finally got the girl’ songs.”
Shawn knows very little about life in general, he recognizes that, but he knows better than to argue the percentage right now. Tentatively, he reaches for her, finding her knee.
“Tell me what you need.”
“I don’t know,” she snaps. Shawn draws his hand back and feels his chest tighten. It can’t end like this. Not after everything.
“Ok,” Shawn breathes, nodding to himself, ready to collect his shredded dignity and search on his hands and knees for the flap of furni pad they designed as the door.
Her hand stops him. She grabs at him clumsily in the dark, then finds his wrist. She can probably feel his pulse in her small fingers.
“You know I’d never, ever tell you not to record a song, right?”
There’s a desperation he barely recognizes in her voice. He nods until he remembers she can’t see him.
“Yeah, Lill.”
“Because I wouldn’t. I’d never try to take something like that away from you. I know you would sooner die before putting anything on a record that you don’t think belongs there, and it belongs there because you love it. I’d never want you to put that aside for my feelings.”
“I know,” he whispers tenderly, smoothing the pad of his thumb across the tendons of her wrist.
“Ok,” she says, creeping back toward calm, “Good. Then… do what you’re gonna do. Make the best fucking record. And we’ll figure it out.”
Shawn ducks his head. He knows ‘lucky’ doesn’t begin to cover it. But now when he writes, he works on finding a bunch of other words to help him get there.
Lilly exhales through her nose. It’s quiet for a few long seconds. Until--
“I’m so getting producer credit for all this shit, by the way.”
+
“This was a bad idea,” Lilly groans.
Shawn looks over at her. She’s shrugged into a ball in the front seat of his rented Range Rover. Her knees cover her masked face. Her eyes dart anxiously.
“Stop doing that,” he sighs, reaching over with one hand and pushing at her knees, “The windows are tinted. You’re wearing a mask. I’m wearing a mask. It’s fine, honey.”
Even with half her face covered, Lilly looks skeptical. He leaves his hand on her thigh and rubs circles with his thumb while they sail down an uncharacteristically empty Mulholland Drive.
Shawn was desperate to get out. They’ve barely left the property in six weeks, an unignorable reminder of their privilege. But while Lilly would very happily never see a human again as long as she lives, Shawn is a Leo.
“Yeah, and?” he prods after she reminds him of his astrological sign over post-workout protein smoothies.
“And that means you are not a happy camper without a spotlight. In your case both literally and metaphorically.”
He laughed and kissed her. She let him.
But the drive was a tough sell. Even though he promised they wouldn’t get out anywhere, even in a socially distant setting, it felt like a risk to Lilly. It took the reassurance of the windows and the masks to even get her in the car.
Now that they’re here, Shawn feels something heavy in his chest dissolving that he didn’t realize was there. He sings along to Spotify and drums on the steering wheel and points out crazy houses as they wind through various canyon neighborhoods, Lilly’s favorite.
“It took what, two days for pap photos to show up of you guys walking around her neighborhood in Miami? That was Miami, Shawn. How do you not expect paps to be stalking every tinted-out Range Rover within 5 square miles of Beverly Hills?”
Shawn’s thumb stills. He tilts his head back and forth at a stop sign, stretching his neck.
“We called them.”
Lilly looks up at him. “Hmm?”
“The paps in Miami, they were there because our teams called them.”
Lilly’s brows pull together. “But there were pictures almost everyday. For like, a week.”
“Yeah,” Shawn sighs, “I know.”
Lilly is silent and contemplative. He starts up the soothing rubbing of her skin, even if it’s more effective for him than for her.
“It’s just that if they do happen to find us, that’s it. We’re officially on the radar. Everyone will know you broke up, everyone will know we’ve been staying together. For weeks, Shawn. It sends a very clear message.”
They roll to a stop at a light somewhere near Outpost Estates. Shawn tugs his mask down below his chin.
“I’m prepared for all of that. It’s ok if you’re not, if you’d rather keep it quieter this time, I totally get it. Things are… different now. But you’re not my dirty little secret, Lills, you never have been and I will never let you feel that way.”
Lilly cedes, dropping her own mask and wetting her lips. “I don’t want to… hide. I just want you to be prepared for the fact that a lot more people are going to be mad at you for leaving her for me than were mad when you left me for her.”
The light turns green. Shawn bites his lip and presses the gas. They drive in silence for a while.
“Did I scare you?”
Shawn startles a little at the sound of her voice and cracks a little smile.
“No, baby, you didn’t. I mean, I know the deal by now. It’s just… so fucking unfair to you.”
Shawn finds a quiet little cul de sac that backs up against a wooded area. He parks and turns the music down.
“Don’t look at me like that,” Lilly pleads only half playfully, “I know fandom at least as well as you do. It’s ok.”
“But how?” Shawn insists, squinting at her, “How is it ok? The things people say to you, and you’re not even a public figure. How does it not get to you?”
Lilly smiles sadly. “It does sometimes. But I decided a long time ago that you were worth it.”
The guilt weighs heavily all over again. Leaving her feels unfathomable now, like it wasn’t a year ago that he did it, but ten years. That was a stupid kid version of him then. He knows so much better now. He hopes he does.
Shawn links their fingers and draws Lilly’s knuckles to his lips. He watches her over the top of them. She sinks happily into her seat and goes a lovely shade of pink.
“If I wrote down how many times I day I think about how fucking crazy I am about you, the world would be out of paper.”
Lilly cackles, tossing her head back. Her laugh makes him laugh.
“What?” he giggles.
“What a line!” she crows.
“That wasn’t a line, that was from my deep and lyrical heart!”
“That was the line-iest line that has ever lined. Shawn Mendes, you smooth motherfucker.”
He rolls his eyes but can’t stop grinning. “Shut up. I’m never saying anything nice to you again.”
“Mmm, you can’t help it, honey, you’re Canadian.”
He huffs an exhale through his nose and closes his eyes. Her thumb is soft and warm against the back of his hand.
“And apparently really fucking crazy about me,” she adds softly. He tilts his head and opens one eye to look at her.
“I am. Can’t remember why though.”
Lilly’s lips pucker as she considers a thought. Shawn’s legs tingle.
“Put the seats down in the back and I’ll happily remind you.”
Shawn feels his eyes go comically wide. Lilly’s lips spread into a Cheshire cat smile.
“You’re kidding. You’re not kidding?”
“I’m actually super not kidding.”
He hears her laughing as he leaps out of the car and crawls into the trunk to put the seats down. She doesn’t stop until the trunk closes behind them and his lips are on her earlobe.
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Taglist: @smallerinfinities​ @the-claire-bitch-project @achinglyshawn​ @infiniteshawn​ @mendesoft @singanddreamanyway​ @alone-in-madness​ @abigfatmess​ @shawnitsmutual​ @awkwardfangirl2014​ @september-lace​ @sinplisticshawn​ @rollingxstone​ @randi-eve​ @fallmoreinlove @heyits-claire​ @itrocksmysocks​ @parkerspicedlatte​ @simpledomain​ @abeautiful-and-cloudy-day​ @thecurlsofgod​ @magcon7280​ @bensbuttercup​ @shawnsmusical​ @paigeasourous​ @tell-me-when-ur-ready​ @softmendesss​ @searchingunderthestars​ @buggy-blogs​ @mendesficsxbombay​ @siennarossi​ @lostinshawnsmemory​ @umbreakablesoul​ @sleepybesson​ @shawnsheaven @poseshawn​ @shaawnie @shawn-youth​ @graysonmendes​
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venomous--fics · 5 years
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Anon requested: Can I please request Eddie Brock/Venom helping their s/o who has a tendency to overwork themselves? Like they work super hard at work, go above and beyond at school, but end up so tired and exhausted and anxious bc they should be doing more? Thank you!!!!
You groaned as you kicked the apartment door shut with your foot, nearly losing the papers you were comically holding in your mouth and arms. You carefully set everything on the table and began setting it into the appropriate stacks so you could continue working. It wasn't unusual for you to bring work home, but for the last couple of weeks, you've brought home nearly triple than what you were supposed to.
At first, Eddie didn't see it as an issue because you still got the right amount of sleep, you ate, showered, basically, you functioned like a normal human. But lately, he's gotten kinda worried because he's noticed how your anxiety has been making you go into overdrive. Sure, you liked going a bit overboard to show off, but now it just seemed like it was a real problem. 
Eddie had gotten home an hour after you did, and as he would've guessed... You were slouched at the table. Pen in your mouth, paper in your left hand, right hand holding your head up as your eyes fought to stay open long enough to even hit the space bar on your laptop. Maybe it was just a long day, he thought, but he saw that the plate of dinner you'd made for yourself was still in the microwave. It wasn't even warmed up.
He sighed as he took his jacket off and shushed Venom, who was confused as to why you were behaving this way. Outside of Eddie's anxiety, he didn't know how it affected different people. He didn't want to say it, but it worried him. Humans were stupidly complicated.
Eddie sat to your right and neatly set his folded hands on the table, "Hey. How was work?"
It took a minute for your fried brain to register that he was even there. Your glazed over eyes trailed over to him, "What?"
Eddie smiled a little and quietly shut your laptop, "Babe, I- Well, we think you need a break."
"But I-"
Eddie got up from the table and walked over to the fridge, "No if, ands, or buts."
You looked at the mess of papers, feeling so irrationally uneasy about taking a break. Your brain wouldn't stop telling you to just ignore him and keep working. If you don't do it now, it'll never get done. You'll probably lose your job if you don't finish all of this work right this very second. 
"So, I'm no cook-"
"You really aren't."
"As I was saying-"
"You burn water, Eddie. I didn't think that was physically possible....But I guess it is for you."
"As..I was-"
"You always burn my tater tots too. It's not hard to follow instructions, Eddie."
Eddie sighed as he set the box of pasta noodle on the counter, "Why don't we ask Y/n to help with dinner then?"
"At least they don't burn water."
They paused for a moment. Normally you were ready to step in and make dinner, or tell them to bicker somewhere else, to which they'd just step to the other side of the table. But there was nothing. They turned their attention to you, and surprise surprise, you were working again.
"Don't you want to help with dinner?" Eddie asked a bit sheepishly, "You know I really suck at this.."
"Mmhmm." you hummed, "In a minute."
"Babe-"
"I said in a moment," you repeated.
Eddie walked back to the table and shut your laptop, and again, like earlier, it took your brain a moment or two to process what was happening.
Your hands slumped into your lap and you rested against the back of the old chair, staring blankly ahead. Eddie wasn't sure if you were giving him attitude or if you were just so tired that you didn't want to talk, but he just didn't like seeing you like this.
"Can you please take a break?"
"I can't."
"Why not?"
"I have to get it done."
"Right now?" Eddie flipped through some of the papers and noticed that some of the dates were for next week, "Babe, you're gonna work yourself to death.."
You clenched your fists and pinched your eyes shut, "I have to get them done so that way I don't have to worry about them anymore."
"I was okay with you bringing, yknow, a normal amount of work home but this is a bit much, isn't it?" Eddie looked back to you, and that’s when he finally noticed the dark circles under your eyes. He sighed, not in disappointment or anything, just out of guilt that he didn't stop you sooner, "Listen to me."
He sat back in his original position, to your right, "Well, I mean, more like trust me.. This shit sucks, like alot, but worrying about it all the time isn't going to make it better."
"But, if-"
"Finishing it early won't really make a difference either." Eddie immediately realized how harsh that sounded, "What I mean is that, by the time you even get to the stuff for next week- It's gonna be next week..."
You sighed, caving in a little, "I guess I got a little.. Overzealous. I just.. I really need to stay on top of it all-"
Your sentence broke off into intangible rambling and you got so worked up about it all that you started crying, and then you started crying more because you were crying for a silly reason.
Eddie quickly pulled into a hug and rubbed your back, "It's okay, I promise. Just take a deep breath."
You listened to Eddie and took a few deep breaths, and when you calmed down enough, you noticed that your arm felt a bit warmer. You looked and saw Venom coiled around your arm, like a slick little worm, and his small blob head rested on your shoulder, and for the first time in a while, he looked sad or upset.
"Sorry," you said quietly.
Two little white eyes looked up at you, almost innocently, and not like he had eaten a mugger two hours prior to coming home, "It's not your fault."
Eddie, wanting nothing more than you help you feel better, helped you stand up, "How about this..?"
You looked up at him, wiping your face a little, but Eddie moved your hands and cupped your face, "What if Venom and I attempt to make dinner while you take a shower and get into something comfier?"
That did sound nice, you hadn't noticed how stiff your clothes felt.
"And we can watch whatever you want, or eat in bed, I don't care."
You paused for a moment, and Eddie knew you were thinking about working still. With your face still in his hands he gently tilted your chin up and gave you a soft kiss on the lips, "Won't take no for an answer, love."
"What if I want to eat in the shower?"
"Sounds terrible," Venom chimed, still latched to your arm.
You chuckled, and you saw how Eddie and Venom both lit up at the sound. You stifled another chuckle as you playfully ran a finger under Venom's chin as he uncoiled himself from your arm, "Okay, okay, I'll shower."
"Thank you." Eddie said, stepping back to the stove.
You were about to head to your bedroom for clothes when you looked back at the table. Eddie could feel you staring, "I promise we will help you work tomorrow, or the day after, but-"
"It's alright, I was just.." You cleared your throat, "Thinking about clearing off the table."
"And I'm the president," Eddie quipped, setting the pot of water on the burner.
"No you're not."
"It's an expression."
"I'm not happy about it."
"No, not that kind of-...That's an emotion."
"I feel nothing."
You laughing as you gathered some clothes and went into the bathroom, "It seems like V is quiet the comedian."
"Don't encourage him."
You started the shower and the moment the warm steam started filling up the room, you felt ten times better. Maybe you should really just take a step back for a bit. Take it easy, as all your friends would say.. Of course, you were stubborn so there's no telling if you would actually listen, but, it was worth a shot. Also, why do warm things have to be so relaxing? You were almost dozing off in the shower. It was nice, you had to admit, but, not exactly a good place to just fall asleep in.
You couldn't help but think about all the work you should be doing, but you tried to shut it all off by imagining the mess you'd have to help clean up after pasta night. It was a bit amazing how big of a mess one, arguably small, alien could make with a single noodle.
Maybe there was other things to worry about. Not that you should worry, but habits die hard. Either way, worried or not, you finished up in the bathroom and got into the comfiest clothes you'd worn in a while. And upon leaving the bathroom, you could hear Eddie and Venom bickering in the kitchen about how to cook the sauce. 
"Just read the can." you said, smiling as you stepped into view.
"That's easy for you to say," Venom said, "I can't read English."
"That explains alot," you replied.
"It's difficult. Eddie is no better."
"I love you guys."
"We love you too."
Eddie awkwardly held out a sauce covered spatula, "Could you.. Help me? I'm a bit worried I'll burn the sauce."
You took the spatula, "Just gotta make sure it doesn't get too hot."
"Oh."
"That's what I said," Venom spat.
You snickered a bit more as you helped your boys out in the kitchen. Dinner went smoother than expected and all three of you wound up crashing on the couch, wrapped up in a huge blanket Eddie had bought over the holidays because, 'It was on sale.' For your information, it had puppies and hearts on it, so Eddie bought it for those two things alone. Price was an after thought. It's always an after thought with Eddie.
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aaronbyron · 3 years
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woshivn · 3 years
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fmlfpl · 5 years
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Lineup Lamentations - GW7
Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week!
WALSH
TRANSFERS:
OUT: McGinn
IN: Mount
Okay fam, I fucked up this week.
Hands in the air this one is on me but I fucked myself by not moving on Wednesday before price changes where both Tammy and Mount went up so I am 0.1 away now from doing the double swap.
Was waiting for all the cup games to end and then was planning on getting Tammy in before his rise...totally forgot... Mount rose as well and so fuck me. Vacation mode throwing me properly off over here so what can I do? I am but a flawed human and I will live with the consequences of my dumbassedry.
Ultimately I am feeling that removing McGinn is better than removing Haller especially with this news that Lanzini has been training and is back. I just don't think Villa look very good in general and will continue to seriously struggle for goals even though McGinn has good underlying numbers and shit I think he's just a bit meh.
Haller has been bad but looks incredible irl eye test and so who knows the fixture is pretty good from an attacking sense maybe I get really lucky here but I will not tell you all any lies... it feels fucking bad to not have Tamela in this moment. I did contemplate a hit to get Tam in but ultimately felt like it had more of a chance to blow up in my face than work out gangbusters so I'm going to just do the one move...float...and check out what is what next gameweek with two frees after UCL and shit. Seems okay...
Who am I kidding? complete nightmare disaster I'm dumb and I hate myself.
GK:
Pope (avl)
Pope remains from GW1 after popping back into the good graces with a clean last week. Still great fixtures and he's great so an easy hold set and forget type of lad. Good boy Pope.
DEF:
Three at the back for me this gameweek in an unusual turn of events for my squadron.
Alexander-Arnold & Robertson (shu)
Trent and R0bbo go to Sheffield United in what should be a clean banker. If Sheffu can only muster two shots against Everton then not expecting fireworks here against Livp. Granted they are home...but still..come on. Get it done here boys...time for another clean.
Otamendi (eve)
Third guy is NicoOta who somehow just threw up a ridiculous haul last game. Maybe the answer is just Dinho in and they'll keep cleaning like we thought they would. Who knows. I don't and I still think (read: know) Ota is a nightmare but at the moment the price is right and the nail is on.
At Everton suddenly seems like a dreamland fixture as they drag their feet until their manager gets the sack lunch. Get in.
MID:
Salah (shu) & Sterling & De Bruyne (eve)
Still on the three big boppers Mo, Raz, and Kevin.
All three great guys, I’m happy to see people selling Raz hope he drops 1m in price he is going nowhere from my team little razzy baby will come back with a vengeance to punish the non believing heathens.
Mo looked really bad and off it last game so hopefully his touch is back and he can do something this weekend.
Mount (BHA)
New boy Mount goes for me and it feels nice to be part of the mounted cavalry division. Nice little fixture run and still a good price. I really want to get in Maddo soon but Mount seems basically the same thing with a bit lower price no knock and better fixtures at least for right now.
Not sure why I'm talking about Maddo here but I am so that's cool.
Cantwell (cry)
Finally, Todd goes to Selhurst in what should be a who knows what the fuck it will be kind of a game. I could see anything from 0-0 snoozefest worst thing of life to a 4-2 barn burner. Either way, I believe in Todd and I love Todd so I'm going to throw him out in the XI for the near term and see how he rolls.
FWD:
Pukki (cry)
Pukki still in of course..good guy still is good.
Haller (bou)
Haller still in as well...yikes. Pretty massively and utterly terrified of not owning Tammy even more so typing this out now so just gotta hope I get away with it. Eek.
CAP:
Sterling (eve)
Raz gets the armband again.
Was chatting about it in Slack just before typing up lambs and the honest truth of the matter is if I twist off Raz cap after all these weeks of mental anguish to see him spike this game at Goodison I would just be completely beside myself with grief.
I don't want that, so I'm going to just stay with the boy and hope he wakes up on the right side of the bed tomorrow and destroys Everton.
ALON
TRANSFERS:
OUT: Diop
IN: Tomori
I wavered back and forth on this one because Diop and West Ham have kept three cleans in a row and have really good home bankers coming up and all that good shit.... BUTTTTTTTT... they’re still bad at defending. They really are. The cleans have been nice but felt pretty lucky. They had Manchester United which is arguably best cleansheet fixture in the league and I got my points and so now I’m bailing.
Tomori has almost identical home fixtures to Diop coming up and I’m taking a swing that with Kante back (and Rudiger soon) they are a better team and better defense then West Ham... So in the equal home fixtures I prefer Tomori and then in the aways I feel like West Ham have relatively no chance at a clean (for example this week away to Bournemouth I see them conceding two or three) whereas Tomori and Chelsea away Southampton and away Burnley and away Watford coming up I’m like yeah I could see it, maybe clean one of those if I’m lucky clean two of those? That seems not farfetched to me.
It’s fucking weird buying a defender for a team with no cleans but comparatively to West Ham I think I’m getting in a step ahead here and hopefully it pays me back :)... Come on you Fikayo.
GK:
Gunn (tot)
Spurs are kind of shit but also this is like a 1% chance of a clean for Gunn.
My biggest mistake on Wildcard was not finding the 0.1 somewhere (SEE: MARTIN KELLY) and going Pope over Gunn but honestly I’m just gonna stick by Angus “Gunn to my head” Gunn through these difficult fixtures and just hope he racks up some saves and bones and the odd clean here and there and then their fixtures turn in GW12 and maybe it’ll all be fine.
Maybe.
DEF:
Tomori (BHA)
Good cleanable fixture. Not AMAZING but a solidly good clean shout at home. Come on lad.
Lowton (avl)
Another solid clean shout here.
Away is obviously tougher but Aston Villa struggle to create big chances and with how deep Burnley set up it will be tough to get behind them and counter them... I feel like a defensive howler from Mee or Tarko will be Villa’s best chance of the game. Hopefully it comes clean for me.
Söyüncü (NEW)
The fucking kid. I love Soy so much.
This should be a very straight forward clean. Hopefully Soy doesn’t do something absolutely insane and concede a penno for no reason and it’s just an easy job with bones and shit. Come on SoyyyyyBoyyyyyLadddddd.
MID:
Salah (shu), Sterling & De Bruyne (eve)
Lottttt of aways this week for me which does not feel terrific at all.
Salah is easiest hold ever despite a bit of a slow start underlying numbers.
Raz had his 0 minutes played early doors and should be back in there firing on all cylinders and Kevin requires no words. If ya didn’t jump immediately on Kevin after GW1 or GW2 then we haven’t been watching the same shit and you clearly don’t listen to a word that Walsh and I say so fuck you anyways.
Cantwell (cry)
The aways just keep coming and I don’t like it...
Palace are tough to break down but they’re also WAY worse at home and love nothing more but conceding possession... This will be a really really interesting game to see how Norwich do when they have ~65% of the ball and have to break down the Woy bus factory.
I expect good things but I’m a little nervous.
FWD:
Agüero (eve)
Kun is real good.
Pukki (cry)
Check what I said above about Todd and apply the same down here to Teemu.
Abraham (BHA)
Tammy is putting up gigantic elite numbers and I see no reason why that won’t continue. Outside of Man City Tammy has the best non-penalty expected goals per 90 in the entire league. Ya love to see it.
The one caveat that I have is that Brighton are pretty good.
BHA have middle of the pack defensive numbers despite facing Man City already this season and they just seem solidly like a mid-table maybe top 10 team.
Potter is great and has completely transformed how they set up and play and they’re just good. People thinking that this will be a Chelsea easy walk in the park 4-0 ass fucking I think are very misguided and relying too much on the color of the fixture on the FPL site and not using data, team stats, brains, etc...
CAP:
Agüero (eve)
This did not take me long to sort out. Kun is on fire, City are the best attacking team in the world as usual, and Everton aren’t great. Hopefully Kun hauls in a loss then I’m in dreamland ;)...
It’s a bummer that it’s away but he’s still Kun and can score a hat trick vs. any non-Liverpool opponent away from home. You might call me not a home/away splits believer.
Come on Kun do it baby boy, Everton are ripe for a destruction... And if City score early the fucking pitchforks will be out at Goodison and Silva and the Everton players should crumble under the immense negativity and booing and horribleness.
NOT RANDOM SLACKER: DEREK
Fresh off of IRL pod we assigned Lambs this week to the one and only Derek.
TRANSFERS:
OUT: Coleman
IN: Otamendi
Mentioned on the pod, easy transfer: defender on terrible looking Everton team for an attacking City defender with a great fixture run for the same price.
Seamus got me a couple cleans early and had some great chances for a dong but at this moment cannot be more thrilled to take him out of my team.
This was my plan since before last GW.. sucks I missed Ota's absurd game vs. Twatford but regardless, I'm very happy with this pick.
GK:
Pope (avl)
New friend to the team last week brought me a clean sheet. Hoping for the same this week with Villa away.
Burnley has a nice run coming so expecting some cleans from him.
DEF:
Otamendi (eve)
New transfer in.
I don't love him as a defender and we all know he's struggled at times this year but with Dinho seemingly slotted to the LCB position I’m hoping City can stay relatively tight and keep some cleans on this run.
And with Kevin's super precise set piece deliveries so far this year (and all the time when he is healthy and right), I'm expecting Ota to continue to find his head on some of these balls for some more dongs.
Robertson and van Dijk (shu)
Two lads who have been on my team since GW1.
At this point, cleans haven't been plentiful like how I imagined but a goal and two assists from them is still solid and I expect Liverpool to improve on the defensive front. Sheffield should be staying pretty tight in the back at home so this fixture feels very cleanable.
MID:
Sterling and De Bruyne (eve)
Just two guys on the most potent, explosive attacking team in the league. It's time tor Raz to get some returns for the first time since GW3. Yikes.
Salah (shu)
Mo will be Mo and continue to do Mo things AKA return return return. Even having a shitty ass game like last week, he still got me an assist.
Mount (BHA)
I've had the Fat Frank loving youngster since GW3 and he's price risen 6 times since then which is wild but still think he's a great value pick for those who do not have him.
On the year he has 3 goals in 6, constantly finds himself in the box with good chances, and with this great fixture run coming up, I expect him to continue to tick.
FWD:
Pukki (cry)
Palace away doesn't feel great, but Pukki has proven he can score in any fixture so hoping he delivers me one here.
Abraham (BHA)
Coming off a late push at Stamford Bridge last week versus the league leaders, Chelsea should continue with their offensive prowess vs Brighton back at home.  Although I don't expect Tammy's absurd finishing efficiency to continue at this rate, his physicality and quickness in the box is here to stay which will continue to yield him good opportunities and big chances.
Plus with up-and-down-the-wing god Marcos A. slotted in at left back with Emerson out, Tammy should be getting some great service in the air.  Love having two offensive players from the same team cause the dreams and realization of an assist-dong combo is just the best actual feeling in all of FPL.
Greenwood (ARS)
Taking a chance here going with my other Mason: the 17 year old United striker..feels especially risky with him playing 90' midweek in the cup match.
He has yet to start in a league game this year, but has started in both games outside of the league and has a goal in each of them. With Rashford's groin injury and Martial seemingly dead for eternity (I won't believe he's healthy til I see him on the team sheet), OGS has limited options up top so realllly hoping he gives the kid a chance this week at Old Trafford for his first league start.
From the little I've seen from Greenwood, seems like he is not shy to shoot and with Paul hopefully back maybe the team can progress the ball better and develop some offensive threat again..we shall see.
CAP:
Sterling (eve)
I'm going with Raz for the fifth GW in a row.
We all know what he's capable of..sitting the whole 90' on the bench or scoring a hatty. Hoping for the latter in the away fixture at Goodison cause I think City are gonna have their way with the Toffees. I'd be lying if I said I'm not scared captaining Raz considering he played 70+ minutes midweek in the cup and UCL coming up next week but fuck it.
Weird to see him drop in price two times in a week and seeing some captain polls, kinda feels like a slight differential captain.  Vice will be on Mo.
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