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robbie-wallis · 5 months

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I need to vent about Watcher, endure it if you can

Relax, this isn't a parasocial thing, but it is a long ass post, which suits me as a long ass human.

I need an outlet to discuss the terrible business decision Watcher has made by announcing their plan to leave YouTube, and this long-forgotten Tumblr account reached from its grave to grab at my ankle.

If you didn't see their video, good for you. It's extremely cringe-worthy in its sentimentality and editing, with blurry shots, pensive pauses and obligatory sad piano.

But at least there's no f'ing Ukulele.

Although, I think we might get the Ukulele in a few months.

Even though anyone who reads this is probably familiar with what the "Ghoul Boys" have done, I feel as though I need to add a little history.

WATCHER HISTORY

You can skip this part if you've been obsessively following the shenanigans, this is for the noobs who were never a "shaniac" or a "boogara".

Shane Madej and Ryan Bergara used to work at Buzzfeed. They hosted the successful Buzzfeed Unsolved shows. In 2019 they followed in the footsteps of the Try Guys and Safia Nygaaard and left Buzzfeed to create their own YouTube channel named "Watcher".

They brought along Steven Lim, another Buzzfeed person who is most known for the "Worth It" series. This series followed Lim and his friend/s spending obscene amounts of money on obscenely overpriced and indulgent products.

Think of it as being similar to the $100 V's $10,000 Sidemen content, only without the self-awareness and British "bad lads" humor.

Notably, even the Sidemen seem to have cut back on those adventures, perhaps understanding how bad it looks when so many people are struggling to pay their essential bills.

Steven became the CEO of Watcher while Shane and Ryan continued to create and present for the new channel.

They were wildly successful by YouTube standards. At the time of their self-spanking on Friday they were close to achieving 3 million subscribers, in just 4 years, based on basically only 2 cornerstone shows. If Social Blade is still a reasonably trusted source in everything but estimating income, they were gaining thousands of new subscribers every week.

Their most successful shows were Ghost Files, Puppet History, Too Many Spirits and Mystery Files.

Ghost Files is the only one of these shows which requires heavy investment, travel, a large crew and impressive production costs. These videos are shot on-location and require a lot of work. The rest are basically Good Mythical Morning style, just the two hosts and their banter.

Aside from Ghost Files, their content could be created with 3 cameras, 2 lapel mics and a good editor.

They were massively successful, solely because of Ryan and Shane.

THE DEMISE

So, what did they do on Friday 19th April? They decided to announce the launch of their own subscription platform.

Not a Patreon for extra content, behind-the-scenes, audience interaction etc, (they already had a Patreon with 6,000 paying subscribers earning them at least $50k a month), but a bespoke streaming platform which looks like a clone of Netflix.

The cost is $5.99 a month, or $60 a year.

Comparable to Netflix.

And by that I mean the price is comparable to Netflix while the content is comparable to a 4 year old YouTube channel.

Don't get me wrong, their production quality is incredible. The quantity, however, is not.

From the end of May viewers will have to pay to be a subscriber on their own platform in order to watch their shows.

They'll still be posting their trailers on YouTube, and the first episodes of new shows, but to watch it all you'll have to pay up or miss out.

Edited to add: Variety originally reported the Watcher crew were planning to remove all their existing content from YouTube to monetize it on their own platform. It's since been confirmed they will not be removing their old content. Fans are undecided whether this was a back-track after the announcement or a misunderstanding by Variety. You be the judge.

Of course, they're entitled to do this. They are creating a product and you can either enjoy it or not. No one is entitled to see it, for free, whenever they like.

Why did they do this?

Half of the sombre video gushes about their "humble beginnings" as "struggling young guys in a big harsh world", which comes across as extremely self-indulgent and ego-stroking.

A quarter of it explains how insanely successful they've been on YouTube and how this is all thanks to the fans who stuck with them after Buzzfeed, how it's allowed them to hire 25 people, how it's given them the freedom to create what they enjoy making and what the viewers want to see, and - most importantly - how it's allowed them to increase production quality on Ghost Files.

The final quarter of the video explains that this isn't good enough, the quality isn't high enough, the finish not glossy enough, it's not "TV caliber" enough! They want more, they need more, you have to give them more, mostly (apparently) because their CEO Steven Lim wants to bring back his show where he flies around the world with his bestie sipping Champagne and eating gold-leaf-covered lobster.

In short, they want more money to make even bigger things, even though their audience never asked for that.

WHY IT WILL NOT WORK

Oh my goodness, this is going to be a ride so strap in.

I'm not a YouTube creator so there are a lot of things I do not know. Having said that, I know a little about business.

This ain't Buzzfeed, y'all

Watcher became successful because of Ryan and Shane. It was their friendship, their personalities, and the content we loved to watch featuring them at Buzzfeed, that brought us along for the ride.

The audience they poached from Buzzfeed is there for them and Ghost Files. It's not there for Steven Lim and "Worth It". His show worked under the Buzzfeed umbrella only because they had numerous sub-categories in that community to support it.

The Try Guys left and created their own channel from their Buzzfeed fans.

Safia Nygaard left and created her own channel from her Buzzfeed fans.

Shane and Ryan left and created Watcher from their Buzzfeed fans.

Steven Lim left and became the CEO of Watcher. He didn't take his audience with him.

The audience of Watcher is not the audience of "watch me fly around the word with my pal and spend $100K on hand-reared, Whiskey marinaded, diamond-encrusted Kobe steak".

And... IN THIS ECONOMY?

Steven chose to become a CEO instead of a presenter. He's missed the opportunity to take that Buzzfeed audience with him.

This is made clear by the Watcher channel itself. Their "man eats food" content rarely breaks 500K views while their Ghost Files breaks 2 million consistently.

If a million of their viewers followed them from Buzzfeed to Watcher, the other 2 million have joined them since, based almost entirely on their spoopy content.

Not only did they base their channel on this genre and format, they have distilled their audience further ever since the creation of their channel and no matter how hard they try to diversify into "man eats food" it's just not working.

This ain't Netflix, y'all

As mentioned, the $5.99 charge is comparable to Netflix and just about every other streaming platform. Only Watcher can't give you even 5% of what a competing platform can offer for that price.

Other platforms also tailor their content and their pricing based on geographical location and localized economics.

You're paying far less than $5.99 a month if you live in an economy where the median household income is $300 a month. YouTube has a global audience. Their subscribers don't all live in a stable economy where $5.99 is considered disposable income.

We don't know the numbers, but I would guess only 60% of their subscribers are based in the USA, Canada, and the UK.

Even for those who do live in a stable economy, their audience is predominantly young adults and students. Most young adults are currently facing the reality that they will possibly never own their own home, they're living day-to-day trying to budget.

They've instantly priced-out a large % of their audience.

I confidently predict that diehard fans who can't see anything wrong with this will sign up for $5.99 a month, binge watch for a couple of weeks, realize there's no new spoopy content and cancel.

They'll come back when a full season of Ghost Files has arrived, pay again, binge it and leave.

Steven Lim thinks they're gonna get $5.99 a month, every month, from thousands of subscribers. In reality they're going to get maybe $12 a year, from people signing up to binge watch what they want, then leaving.

This will then decline naturally as attention wanes during the months where there is no spoopy.

This ain't good marketing, y'all

They're going to be posting "trailers and season pilots" on YouTube.

Sure, I bet YouTube is gonna be totes okay with a channel doing nothing but trying to hijack traffic for an external site.

Posting nothing but trailers and season premiers will mean maybe one full video per month during busy seasons. That's not enough to remain relevant for the algorithm.

If 80% of those posts are also just trailers saying "leave YouTube and come here", the channel will be smacked down quicker than a crypto scam using an AI generated Elongated Muskrat.

Their channel was growing steadily, but that was with full content regularly posted. When the schedule drops off, and when most of it is considered spammy by YouTube, it's going to collapse like a flan in a cupboard.

A streaming platform needs a constant flow of new subscribers just to replace the gradual drop-off (maybe ask Rooster Teeth about that). When your global audience at YouTube is gone, where are those new subscribers coming from?

The platform is also an additional overhead. It's going to cost thousands a month to keep the servers going.

This ain't good financial management, y'all

I don't know if they've already spent hundreds of thousands of $s on Lim's "men eat food" gamble, but I suspect they have.

I know they have spent hundreds of thousands of $s on a new season of Ghost Files, flying to the UK to host live events while filming those episodes.

This means they've over-extended their finances just at the moment where they've cratered their opportunities to see a return on investment.

Just that, on its own, is enough to destroy a production company.

They do not need 25 employees any more than I need an editor and proof-reader for this long ass post.

They do not need a production studio in Hollywood any more than I needed an office to write this.

They do not need to spend tens of thousands of $s on glossy graphics that appear on screen for maybe 4 seconds in one episode any more than I needed to add screengrabs to this painfully long essay.

By leaving YouTube they've lost:

Adsense revenue (which might not be much on a per-video basis but adds up with a back catalogue over years of productions)

Sponsorship deals, which allegedly contributes almost 50% of their annual revenue.

Merch sales, which is about to crash if the only people they can promote merch to are already paying per month in their smaller ecosystem.

Patreon. Why would someone pay $5.99 twice, for the same or less content?

And they've abandoned all of this for maybe a few thousand people who will probably end up paying just $12 a year when a new spoopy season arrives for them to binge.

I'm no Will Hunting, but no matter how hard I try to make the numbers work they just don't, and I don't need Robin Williams to tell me it's not my fault.

This ain't nice, y'all

Some of you are feeling like Ned's wife right now, and some of you will have no idea what that's in reference to.

Most of you will hate that I made that reference more than you hated the SNL skit.

I get it.

Maybe the worst part about all of his, from a viewer's perspective, is the dismissive nature of their sign-off.

They didn't mention the Patreon members once, not one single time in the whole video. It's like they consider the Patreon "too YouTube". They're the deformed cousin locked in the attic. They're the relative who wasn't invited to the wedding because they can't afford a Tom Ford suit. They're the colleague who isn't invited to the staff night out because they only work in accounting and no one has anything in common with Janice anyway.

These are diehard fans who were actually paying them extra to support them and enjoy a little bonus behind the scenes, and the boys didn't even consider them worthy of an utterance.

They also finished with "If you don't follow us and pay up it's been real, peace out". I'm paraphrasing, but that's basically what it was.

They spent so much of the video saying how awesome and great it was that the fans and YouTube got them to this point, but they didn't thank their Patreon members, and they ended with a blunt suggestion that if you don't follow them and pay more then you're not a real fan anyway and they don't really need you.

"Thanks for getting us here, sucks to be you, bye now!"

You made them wealthy, you helped them hire 25 people, you helped them increase production value to "TV caliber" even though you didn't ask for that, but your job is done and now you're superfluous. Only the real fans are wanted.

In the words of the great George Carlin - "It's a big club, and you ain't in it".

They're okay losing the vast majority of the people who got them here if a few thousand of those are comfortable enough to be able to pay $60 a year for a YouTube channel.

Can it get worse? Sure!

We've had a weekend to enjoy the constant heat of this bonfire and it's predictably worsened with each hour of silence from the company and its employees.

The fact that they haven't back-tracked, despite almost unanimous agreement that this is badder than the baddest thing that could happen to their company, suggests they're okay with it.

Consensus seems to be that they knew it would be this bad, and they're cool. They predicted 90% of people would scream "Boo to you good sirs! Boo indeed!" and they could still survive on the 10% who don't see a problem here.

The lack of response reinforces the narrative that they're totally fine with discarding almost their entire audience if they can just squeeze the cash they need out of whoever is left.

This ain't fixable, y'all (maybe)

Note: I don't want this to be mean, but it's going to sound a little bitchy no matter how I try to say it.

If they'd brought out the Ukulele on Saturday, or even teased Ukulele's on their socials before putting out a video on Sunday, they probably could have survived this with much hand-wringing and a little groveling.

But now I think they've grilled this Kobe steak for far too long.

They've lost 100K subscribers, and counting. The venom among Patreon members is allegedly worse than the public comments section under the video, which is startling. Dozens of YouTubers are torching them harder than a $100 crème brûlée.

People are scraping their channel content in case it's nuked.

Shane "eat the rich" Madej's sentiments over the last few years look disingenuous, to say the least. To shamelessly steal someone else's comment: "Imagine being all 'eat the rich' right before throwing yourself on the plate". He's silent while his McMansion burns down, at his own hands. "Why not!?" indeed.

Steven "I drive a Tesla" Lim's socials now make him look like a tech-bro try-hard and his use of words like "early adopter" and "soft launch" in the video only compound the belief that this was all his brainchild. He is the CEO, and that comes with responsibility and the associated blame. You can't steer the ship into the Bermuda Triangle and then disappear without looking like the bad guy.

Okay, you can disappear, but that convoluted metaphor is a mystery for someone else to solve.

Ryan "TV caliber" Bergara now sounds like an elitist who thinks YouTube is "too pedestrian" for his big plans, not big enough to meet his artistic vision. You see, he's more James Cameron, while YouTube is more like your student film club. He's grown beyond this pesky platform with billions of daily hits offering exponential growth with almost zero financial risk.

Even if they released a video today admitting they messed up big time it's still going to be hard to get the taste of this Ghost Pepper Warhead out of the collective mouth of their viewers.

This hasn't just burned their shared brand, it's singed their individual reputations among an audience upon which their careers rely.

What they should have done, on Saturday, is release a video (Ukulele or no) confessing their error. They should have announced their new platform will instead just be a bigger and better Patreon, with early access to everything, behind-the-scenes content, extra features, audience interaction etc.

They should have reversed to make clear their YouTube channel will stay the priority, their main source of revenue, but that you could get more on their own platform if you want it.

And, maybe, over time, people will pay for that. If they grow their channel to 6 million subscribers in the next 4 years there will be a couple hundred thousand of them willing and able to pay $5.99 a month for 8 years of shows, 8 years of behind the scenes content, 8 years of community involvement and regular early access to new episodes.

Maybe then they could try out their "privileged guys eat expensive food in expensive places" show and see how it does? Maybe a majority of people won't be living on the cusp of poverty by then and it won't look as tone-deaf as a 13 year old YouTuber trying to cover Jeff Buckley's "Hallelujah"? Maybe then they could hire another 50 people and make Bergara's "TV caliber" (I still don't know exactly what that means) game shows and reboots?

The clock has been ticking since they hit that "publish" button on their career ending video, but that clock is about to count down to zero and silence will permeate throughout their previously lively community.

That 1980s basement set needed someone crying in the corner, right?

The problem is, their own platform is not a terrible idea. Really, it's not the worst thing they could do. The badness came in the timing, the switch, the middle finger and the f you. They could have released this as an extra, their own Patreon alternative, waited, developed it over time into something sustainable and established.

They could still try to do that and hope this dark chapter is forgotten.

Maybe I'm wrong? Maybe Lim is a financial genius with more skill than the management of Rooster Teeth and their corporate parent company combined? Maybe this gamble will be wildly successful despite all streaming services down-sizing or just going bankrupt? Maybe they won't be back on YouTube in 3-6 months begging for views after having to lay off 20 of their employees?

I know this... if I were one of those 25 employees blind faith would not be enough to stop me from looking for another job.

I suppose this will, for now, remain... a mystery.

EDIT:

I'm not writing another essay about this, but I'm glad to see they've backtracked and made the right choice to use WatcherTV as any sane creator would - to host early access and exclusive content in addition to their YouTube channel.

Over time, while promoting it in every video, building up that trust and fan base, it can be a secure and long-term financial bonus helping them to expand their business incrementally as finances allow.

Why this wasn't the plan all along is anyone's guess. Gambling everything on this was never the sane decision.

I still think they need to scale back on costs. I still think the food content is not currently a viable source of income while being a serious drain on resources. I still think they need to stop hiring all their friends and they need to hire one person who doesn't have personal relationships with everyone there and can make the tough business decisions.

No one likes firing people, it's ten times worse when it's a friend. But this is a reality of business and just wishing it wasn't so isn't going to make it go away. It would be awesome if we could all run a business where we can hire all our friends and family, never have to rely on any outside funding, make whatever we want, make a great living in one of the most expensive cities in the world and continue to grow.

That's just not the reality.

Their apology was genuine, in my opinion. I just hope they can work out the right financial balance.

#watcher #ghoul boys #steven lim #watcher entertainment #shane and ryan #ghost files

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sickwhispers · 12 days

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eeeee!! yay!! ^♡^ can I ask for finn x reader and/or sprout x reader hcs?? I don't wanna overload u so I'll keep it at those!!! tysm ^_^ -incredibly desperate annon from earlier

Oh my gosh you are such a cutie (/p) don't worry about overloading me, I'm at your service!

WRITE ME LETTERS (hot freaks)

Credits to xx675ehf on tumblr for the finn picture

Pairing: Finn x reader

Relationship: romantic

Warning: he doesn't understand personal space all that much, but he means well

Type: headcanons + drabble

"Whale, whale, whale... look what we have here!" Would be the first thing you hear before he comes barreling towards you at a hundred miles per hour. His body colliding with yours from behind as he brings you in for a tight squeeze

He was never one to really announce his presence, preffering to instead tackle you with affection after a quick fish pun

They never seemed to end when it comes to you

Or, really, they never seemed to end in general

But, if you indulge him just the slightest, it's easy for him to get carried away

He's almost like a dog, in a way

He'd follow you everywhere

To each machine, to each hiding spot, right by your side the second you make your way into the elevator

Every break is spent with him practically glued to your hip, his hands holding onto you in anyway they can

Whether it be by holding your hands, clinging onto your arm, tugging at any article of clothing he could reach rapidly to bring your attention back onto him

He's a Hyper one, and he isn't scared to prove it

He's even been trying to come up with new and improved fish puns

Something that'll impress you

He's self aware, he knows not everyone's a fan of his fish puns

But, even if he was able to score just a tiny giggle from you, he'd be over the moon

"Oh, c'mon! Don't act so koi with me, i dont bite!" His arms wrap around you just a bit tighter, head pressed up right against your side as an proud grin spread across his face.

You had sat on the floor of the elevator, giving yourself a few seconds of peace before having to go back to being tormented once more by the threats lurking around practically every corner. But, of course, there was rarely any moment of peace with finn on your team. He meant well, you knew he did, and he definitely wasn't the malicious type. He just... never seemed to realize when the right time for affection was. And right now, with your chest heaving up and down from a chase you had just endured, you weren't exactly begging for psychical touch.

But at the same time, you couldn't help but find it endearing. Your arm slowly lifted up, shaky from the adrenaline you had just experienced only a few moments ago, before wrapping around him, bringing him just a bit closer. This had caused him to let out an ecstatic gasp in return.

"Yknow, Finn... you're really-" you take a pause, avoiding eye contact with him. Although, despite you doing everything you can not to let your gaze fall right back onto him, you could still feel the way his eyes bored into you. You almost didn't want to say it. Your mouth opening and closing a few times as you tried to muster up the courage. "krilling me with the puns..."

There was a pause. Not one long enough to be considered worrisome, but it had definitely been a decent amount of time before you finally craned your head in his direction. And, once your gaze finally landed on him, the first thing that greeted you were his eyes staring right back into yours. They had widened significantly, and along with that his lips parted slightly. For a second you wondered if it was his body that was shaking or the movement the elevator made as it climbed up to the next floor.

"That..." He began to speak, taking another pause. You soon realized it was his body that was shaking, not the elevator. And, as he took a deep breath, signifying that he was ready to finish his sentence, his smile seemed to stretch farther then you've ever seen. "Was fin-tastic!"

It's safe to say that he'd enjoy it if you ever decided to reply to his puns with some of your own

Nothing would make him happier then hearing a fish pun slip from your mouth, whether it be intentional or a complete accident from all the times you've heard him say them

PERSONAL BODY GUARD

Pairing: Sprout x reader

Relationship: romantic

Warning: none!

Type: headcanons + drabble

Overprotective

That single definition was a word you heard thrown every round every now and then when it came to sprout

And, not once was it ever used as a lie

Because he was, in fact, overprotective

A gentle tug of the wrist in an attempt to drag you away from running head on into a twisted, a two hour lecture afterwards about how much danger you could've been in had he not saved you in time

His presence constantly looming over you each floor, never too far away.

It was a natural instict at this point

No matter how far away you were on a floor, the second one thing goes wrong, he's right by your side

Sometimes he could be a little too much

Not that he cares about your complaints when he's grabbing you by the cheeks, twisting your head in every single direction as he inspects you for any sort of wound

"Do you know how risky that was!? You could've lost a heart!" Despite the almost desperate tone behind his movements, turning your head from side to side, his touch was always gentle. He had taken a good blow to the back, his scarf barely holding onto his form as it threatened to slip at any second. You hadn't lost a heart, thankfully, but he sure did.

He kept you huddled behind a few boxes, legs trembling beneath the both of you as you tried to regain your stamina from the chase you had only managed to survive from. His grip was tight, and once he had made sure you hadn't gotten hurt during your little stunt, he slowly let his hands slip from your face.

"Are... you okay?" You tried to reach out, your arms stretching out to check him for any injuries just like he had done for you. And yet, they didn't have to move an inch before sprout's body seemed to slump against you. His head resting against your shoulder as his arms stayed hanging lazily by his sides. He almost didn't want to move, finding too much pleasure in having you pressed up against him.

A sigh slipped past his mouth, the sound drawn out as he hesitated for a second before speaking. "Me? Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. Well- I'll be fine. But, let's just stay here for a second, okay..?"

You couldn't remember the last time he had ever admitted to not being okay during a run

Typically, he'd brush off your concern with a dismissive wave of his hand

As long as you were fine, he was fine

It didn't take too long before he was reassuring you, smiling as he always did while he stuck a bandaid over a wound too serious for just a simple bandaid.

He always kept the better stuff for you

Did he ever want to admit he put you before himself almost all of the time?

No.

He didn't want you to worry

He's the one who should be worrying about you, not the other way around

He's a bit of a hopeless romantic, it doesn't take much before he's head over heels in love after a simple smile you threw his way

It's always better to be focused and prepared, especially when the people he loves are constantly being hunted down by corrupted versions of his friends

He doesn't like it when the others point out how distracted he gets everytime he spots you from far away, his body freezing up on the spot as his eyes lock onto the way you pick up protein bar off the floor

For a second he wonders if your admiring his picture on the wrapper

But surely that's wishful thinking...

#this is my first time ever attempting to write finn and sprout's character i really hope its in character #ahhhhhhhh im so tired nap time for me now good night everybody #shout out to google for helping me find fish puns for the finn headcanons #dandys world #dandy's world #dandy’s world #finn dandys world #finn dw #sprout dandys world #sprout dw #finn x reader #finn dw x reader #sprout x reader #sprout dw x reader #dandys world x reader #dandy's world x reader #x reader

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gremlingottoosilly · 1 year

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[If you need to be mean] chapter 5

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4

Your date with a new guy isn't good for you. Konig is inclined to show you that. TW: Konig being a huge pervert, Canon-Typical violence, Dub-Con, Innocence kink, Age difference(Konig in his yearly 40, Reader in her early 20)

Pairing: Konig x fem!Reader Tags: Fluff, Power Imbalance, Hurt/Comfort, Size Kink, Possessive Konig, Yandere Konig, Creepy scary stalker Konig, written mostly from Konig's perspective TW for this chapter: Dub-con touching, stalking

You wake up with a throbbing headache and feeling of something dying in your throat. You roll from your bed, completely naked, like a baby deer on shaky legs doing its first steps. And about to die just like one also.

König wakes up like he just won a million dollars and got promoted to KorTac CEO. He almost jumps from his bed – comfortable mattress, personal quarters, perks of being a colonel – and presses his hand on his bulge. Yeah, he has a bit of time to indulge in carnal pleasures. Especially when he can think of your trembling body.

You found a glass of water and a pill – presumably Ibuprofen – on the table. Thank you, drunk me, you want to say – then the vague memories of last night come flooding in, and you run to the bathroom, emptying your already empty stomach once again. Pain won’t stop even after you drink a couple of pills and gulp the whole glass.

König comes with a soft groan, thinking about your helpless body trapped under him, how your fragile form would bulge on the outline of his dick. Of course, he couldn’t do anything while you were drunk off your mind and barely awake, but he can fantasize about this – perfect morning pill for his depraved mind.

You look at the clock – it’s 12 in the morning, you are already one and a half hours late for your day shift. You still don’t know what you were thinking while agreeing to cover for the time that won’t bring you more money but drain your energy instead, but you have already missed it. What is weird, however, is that your alarm didn't work – all five of them. And that your work didn’t called either, despite knowing that manager would be fucking mental over missing a day shift.

König looks at the clock – it’s 5 in the morning and he wakes up a bit earlier than a man of his rank can. One thing about being a commander is that his captains would usually do the drill job for him – he only has to read through various mission reports and see if everything is alright with supplies. Giving orders is one of his least favorite things, but at least he can have another half an hour before turning into a personal devil for his men.

You don’t even bother to eat – nothing will stay in your stomach anyway. Nothing feels right as you struggle to put on your clothes – your closet looks like it was ravaged by a pack of burglars. Either you went completely wild while searching for a pair of panties at night or…yeah, it probably what happened. You can’t find your nice pairs, so you assume they were lost somewhere in the chaos of your room – honestly, you can’t even bother to search for the ones you were wearing yesterday, assuming they just got lost.

König plays with the soft fabric of your panties in his pocket, remembering how good it was looking at you – delicate laces feel incredible in his rough, calloused hands, and he can only imagine how sweet your scent would be once he would press it on his face and masturbate. Too exhausted to do it yesterday, he thinks about breaking into your apartment, maybe getting something new – your locks are shitty, perfect for someone like him to get in and steal your adorable sleeping self.

You think about getting something for your aching, empty stomach – maybe a soup or takeout. Your stomach can’t take it right now, but you now that staying empty would only make it worse – then you take one look at the contents of your wallet, that one hundred dollars bill already went to currency exchange and the rent debt – and, well, maybe you can use one day of, how do they say it, controlled hunger. Maybe you’ll get more tips this evening, if you could convince your manager to give you another shift, and you could buy some good snacks on top of your usual bottom-of-the-barrel groceries. König gets breakfast among his fellow officers, a few good mornings and deadly stares at anyone who asks what he was doing last night and what got him returning to base so late. He would just eat in his room like always, but Hutch asked for a personal report on the last mission and he enjoys talking to someone who is almost as nerdy about embarrassingly many stuff as he is – at their grown-up age also. He would look at his tech expert through his mask and would nod to every little bit of intel they got about the terrorists they were fighting for, three weeks of doing nothing but draining government money only to start covering one cell after another almost every day.

You gag when you think about meeting Tomas at the cafe again – he usually covers daytime shifts, he would definitely be there, oh god, what if he would tell someone about this, what if he really did something to you and you just don’t remember it, what if…he is gone. Dead or missing or whatever, you remember how easily the words slipped from König’s tongue and you ran away to the toilet again, with nothing left in your stomach to vomit – you still cough and gag at the thought. Your memories are weird, shady, maybe it was just a part of the alcohol-fueled dream, but you think about the colonel being here, holding you, undressing you and touching you in all the weird places while taking care of your helpless body and you don’t know what to think.

König wants to pay you a visit, to make sure that his favorite girl is okay and has everything she needs – he remembers your apartment. Shitty, tiny place, not even a proper bed for you to sleep, only a couch with some cushions thrown over it. He would help you with furniture, maybe even buy and haul something to your place – but it would be much better just to buy you and him a new home entirely. Maybe he’d allow you to choose something small, like a color of curtains or the fabric pattern for your new carpet. You would need something to do once the marriage is sealed, he doesn’t want his little wife to get bored. He wants you to feel complete with you, but he can’t even go to your place right now because too much work is out there, on the base.

You stare at the sign “Sorry, we’re temporarily closed” at the cafe’s door and stand here, dumbfounded, for a good few minutes. People look at your expression, bags under your eyes – you look like a zombie, maybe you should have putted some makeup just to look less haunted – as you just stand here, thinking what the actual fuck is going on. You try to call your manager, but he ignores your calls – and when he finally answers, you get nothing but angry yells and pleads to never fucking return.

König thinks about how easy it was to just get your place to close – possible terrorists hiding, a few of his boys going dark at night and scaring the shit out of your manager and whoever was working at that time. He didn’t want it to come to this, you need something to busy yourself with while he’s working – your job is shitty, yes, but he would allow you to work here for a week or so before coercing you into depending on him completely. His wife is a silly little creature who needs some silly little tasks to do – being a waitress works just fine. He could just pay you to allow him between your legs, but you are not some prostitute, you’re his adorable new love, and he would do whatever it takes to prove that he is serious about being with you. He didn’t want it to come to this, but he can’t let you stay at the place where your coworkers can just assault you. Would be nice to just put you into a basement or his room – get you a comfortable collar or tie up your arms and legs so you’d be completely helpless and at his mercy.

You choke on your tears as you understand that you just lost your job. There aren't many other opportunities in this town, not with terrorist threats and possible dangers left and right, not with how many businesses started catering towards constant military presence. You can’t work like this, soldiers scare you – and their colonel is the worst, scaring you even while saving you from Tomas. You don’t have enough money to just not work for a couple of weeks, and you’re already in debt for your apartment. It feels like your life is crumbling apart in just a week. It feels like you know who is to blame.

König attents training of the new recruits – some of them did well at the latest mission and he finally starts to see the hope in these soldiers. If they would manage to drive the terrorists away in a few months, he’d get home before Chrtistmas – and would get a nice wifey on top of that. It feels like his life has finally started coming together. He got what he deserved all of this time, with all the years of hard work and relentless committing of war crimes he did in favor of becoming a colonel.

***

You are counting all of your savings and, yes, you don’t have enough to last even a week without a job that would preferably pay you daily. There isn’t many coffee shops around your town, especially now, when people are too afraid of getting their business blown up or run over for military means – you literally saw a nice bar completely change to cater for soldier’s needs like they intend to be here for long – and you don’t want to have anything to do with the military. If you wanted to get your ass smacked by some entitled assholes who think that if they chose army instead of college, everyone should kiss their boots, you would just call König.

But, you don’t know his number.

But, you don’t even remember what happened last night to the full extent – you remember him touching your body, you can presume that he undressed and helped you with getting on the couch, but he never asked for permission to enter your apartment. It’s too big of a coincidence that he was just right in that alley to help you get away from Tomas. Soldiers usually go on their patrols or whatever, but he is a colonel, you don’t think that people like him can just take a stroll here and there, especially at night. Shouldn’t he fight terrorists?

You try to call some of the coworkers who worked here, with you – and they all politely asked you to go to hell and forget their numbers until you would get your crazy soldier date in place. They were also kind enough to ask for how much you selled your body to the, quote, “Fucking mercenaries who would fuck our country over some money and you are selling yourself to them like a prostitute even if they can just pack their stuff and leave the next months if terrorists are dealed with”.

They weren’t kind enough to listen to your futile attempts of explaining yourself. Situation isn’t even out of control – it never was under it in the first place, you don’t even know what could happened to the cafe in that 10 hours of sleep that you got, and you are even more helpless when you think about the reputation you got for just hanging out with König for like…a few hours at most? Yes, you spoke to your fellow waiters about him – mostly because they were very interested about the tip he left you, you talked to your friends about a creepy, but cute guy who was talking to you, your family – how you get out after breaking the curfew without getting into the police department for it.

Almost funny, now one and a half interactions can ruin your life so easily – not just your work, not just the relationships with your coworkers, but everything as a whole. You are still shaking from what happened last night, the understanding that Tomas might be dead, but now it only indicates that König can literally do what he wants. Kind in his very own kingdom. You want to vomit, but that would only hurt you even more, and you don’t have time to rest or be physically unwell.

He promised you a job, you remember. Working with the military, being their guide to the city. Having connection to many people in this place, maybe you could even help in pointing at the possible threats without looking suspicious – but then again, you would just sell yourself to soldiers who couldn’t care less about your life or the life of your town. They are not some good-hearted UN intervention, they are a bunch of mercenaries who get paid by the president to help with the threats that he himself has fed and raised here. You think about helping them – then you think about how it would only make it worse for you.

You think about how this man looked at you – how his hands were trembling when he put a hand on your shoulder and squeezed it softly. You can at least hear him out – the worst that could happen is that he says no and you die from hunger, right?

*** Horangi loves his job. He isn’t at home, which means the debt collector wouldn’t get to him, he has a place in this world, and a shiny new sergeant badge that could very easily become the lieutenant one if he would succeed with this mission and a hard task of deciphering what his colonel might want. König is a great man except for all the times he isn’t, and a perfect soldier – except for all the bloodbath he is causing every time this man is too caught up in his thoughts. He doesn’t talk much, don’t ask him about his past, and the other teammates are great too – it’s not the army where basically no one wanted to serve, it’s a PMC where everyone has their place. Some for the money, some for the honor…and money – but they all know what they are doing.

Main problem is boredom.

When you are a soldier deployed in a small country to hide the terrorists, you think that it would be fun. Blood, slaughter, fighting, beautiful ladies and gentlemens jumping on you because you just look so good in uniform. What he didn’t except, however, was how boring it would be, just sitting on the base in the outskirts of the city, listening to his teammates going crazy from having nothing to do, and increasing the violence counters on the missions because they need something to do.

He would do anything for something to do.

This is when he exited the main entrance of their base and saw his colonel’s sweetheart.

Just to be frank – he does not care that his commander, 6 '10 wall of muscles and anxiety, got a little civilian girlfriend. He could have a whole harem of locals and it would only indicate how manly and cool König is. All of his temamates and subordinates would be happy to know that their leader does fuck and has a way of releasing his pent-up frustration not just on the field and very unlucky rookies. He does not have a problem with knowing that, even if his romantic life is long dead and buried among his debts, while an Austrian has no problem getting laid even if the last time he spoke to a person willingly was three months ago.

Horangi does, however, have a problem with his colonel’s sweetheart because he sees that you are not really responding to his feelings. Would be much easier if you were an easily-swayed somewhat promiscuous little thing that would hapilly jump into his arms and open your legs for whatever fucked-up trauma the man has.

Horangi does, however, have a problem with his colonel being fucking delusional and stalking a random girl. Not because stalking is bad or whatever, god knows, König deserves some love and if the way he expresses it is enough to be a crime, then so be it – but you are not answering his delusions and this is a problem. He would not deal with his commander being frustrated, blue-balled or unsatisfied – he still wants to live and wants the team to thrive. So, when he sees your face – you really are adorable, commander has a good taste in civilians – looking all anxious and devastated and sad, like a kitten that got run over by a military truck, he does a bee-line right to the blockpost in front of the base.

— Got a problem, ma’am?

— I…I just need to talk to König, he was…um, he knows who I am. We talked before.

God, he hates talking to civilians. But you look devastated and the guard at the entrance – sergeant, just like him – told him that this stupid thing just tried to ask for a colonel, like he is a call girl. Guy didn’t get the memo about König’s little fling, as he sees, so Horangi can’t really blame him for being too harsh with you – he also knows that commander would fucking murder him if he won’t know about his love asking for him, and he also knows that even if your thick skull finally admitted to his advances, he need to capture the moment before you ran away.

— Colonel asked for her. Let her proceed.

— But…

— Colonel’s orders. You don’t want to be here if he knows that we didn’t let her through.

You look at the man with shock in your eyes – of course, you have no idea who he is and why he is behaving so warmly. He wears a mask and full armor just like König, but even with him, you at least see his face. The man with a South Korean badge on his chest conceals his gaze with dark sunglasses and tugs on your wrist rather roughly, showing you inside of the building. You would feel scared, but all the anxiety already got to the point of numbness, and the only thing you can feel is slight dread as you proceed deeper in the building.

You sigh as he drags you with thim, other soldiers looking at you with curiosity in their eyes as you blush. You don’t even know if König would appreciate you coming here, being so needy with him after he saved you and ran – maybe he doesn’t feel anything to you anymore, maybe you are too weak for him, too helpless and fragile, maybe…but then again, his soldier was quite confident in allowing you inside. Military bases are usually a highly secured place, guards at the entrance didn’t even allow you to come here until he came along – making you question what exactly he knows about you.

König sits in his office, frustrated as he is reading through reports of the intel – Hutch is a great computer expert, he would give the man a medal already if they were in the official military, but they once again don’t have a lead on the terrorists. Too many people covering them, too many groups spread out across the town and even the country – if they won’t make a move first, it could take months of searching for their hide-out. They are soldiers, not detectives – they don’t have enough intelligence agents to infiltrate them from the sideways. More cynical part of his brain tells him to just wait it out, for their next move – maybe a bomb in the public place, maybe a hijacked plane with russian scriptures written all over it.

They are not here to protect citizens of this country – just to get money and kill terrorists. A few casualties are bound to happen but, oh well, you can’t build a house without killing a bunch of squirrels, right?

Then he sees you – adorable, helpless, cute, perfect, pretty, absolutely stunning in your oversized hoodie and some old jeans that make his pants tighter. How could anyone be so freaking breath-taking while wearing nothing but some lazy day clothes and messy hair? Even the bags under your eyes are not only making him worry for the quality of your sleep, but also makes him want to protect you even more – he bet you would sleep much better after an intense session with him.

Horangi pushes you into the office and you stumble on your feet, tears already filling your eyes. König steps from his table, not even caring about the documents – they are confidential, so he just pushes it deeper in his desk and smiles under his hood. Horangi just promoted himself in his eyes – god, he has to keep tabs on good soldiers, he might need it in the upcoming operations.

You look perfect like this – crying, stuttering, whispering something about how scared you were, how terrified after he saved you. But you shouldn’t be like this! Yes, a fair amount of fear is normal, he wants a nice, obedient little wife who would greet him with open legs and smile on your lips as he returns home from deployment, but he isn’t abusive. He won’t treat you like a scumbag, like many of his fellow soldiers are – you are a delicate little creature that needs to be protected, cherished, like a treasure you are.

But why are you so afraid? You should have thanked him for saving you, fallen on your knees and greeted him properly. Not crying – even though your desperate face is just as adorable, he doesn't want to have a reputation of making women cry in his office. Recruits are already afraid of him.

— What are you doing here, Mein Schatz? I thought you’d be at home.

— I…

How can you even start talking about this? You need help? You are not sure if you can keep your apartment if you don't have a job in the next 12 hours? Your life just came crumbling apart in just one night and you don’t know what to do besides hoping that he would accept you as his guide or whatever, hoping that he won’t ask for something else, worse?

How can he even contain himself when you are biting your lips, cheeks flushed, hands folding your hoodie and you can’t even look at him directly? He is an anxious, nervous man, he doesn’t know what to say half of the time, he is sometimes too scared of saying something that might upset you, but even he feels strong next to you. How you can’t even find your words, forcing him to beckon you closer, as you make a few steps towards him.

— I lost my job.

Of course you did. He sent a whole small strike group to check the place for terrorists and find out that your manager, in fact, had a huge document problem – local police thanked them for this, while he couldn’t care less for another abusive asshole getting out of your way. You said that you can’t spend your time on helping him because of your job – so now, when you don’t have to cater to clients, you can finally cater to him.

— Ja, I know.

— You…you are?

— You have free time now.

It’s so simple – and your face twists in fear when you understand that he really was behind your cafe getting closed. That he saved you from danger while being the one itself – you take a step back, falling almost, this dumb, clumsy part of your body makes you stumble on the clean floor when König covers the distance between you in a second, dragging you closer to him. Sitting on the chair while putting your limp body on his lap, finally enjoying the sensation he craved the most.

You can’t move from fear – but he soothes you softly, hands on your waist and head buried in the crook of your neck. if you had any doubts about whether he still likes you or not, you don’t have it anymore. — I…I need a job, sir. You asked if I could be your guide and…

They already found enough willing participants who are okay with helping mercenaries. They don’t need more civilians because it can endanger the operation – people tend to run their mouths loose, they are already risking by trusting even one civilian consultant.

However, he has another job for someone as cute as you.

— We don’t need a guide anymore.

— You don’t? I…I’m sorry for wasting your time, sir, I will go as…

He pushes you deeper into his body, hands already roaming under your loose hoodie and fondling your skin. You are shaking in his grasp, tears streaming down your face as you go through your short breakdown. König knows how to break people – he didn’t want to do this with you, but he hates himself enough to understand that not a lot of people would be with him willingly.

— We might get to know each other closer.

You cry in his shirt, grasping on the dark fabric as you whimper – finally letting go of your emotions ever since the night. It feels like you were holding those tears your whole life – and he gently pats your back and plays with the lining of your bra under your clothes, making you shudder.

— I’m not…not like this. Sorry.

— I know you’re not like this, Meine Liebe. But I don’t want my dear girlfriend to waste her energy on some cafe.

— Girlfriend? I’m not sure what we are talking about, sir.

— Am I moving too fast?

— Yes.

— Good. Not sure how much time I have in this country.

He moves your head up, gently handing your face so he can smother your lips with a hungry, devouring kiss. He is desperate, deranged, he bites on the softness of your mouth and smiles when you are trying to push him away. Your fight is meaningless and soon enough, your hands fall to your sides, not trying to resist anymore.

— You’re scared, I know. But you don’t have to be.

— I can’t be with you.

— You can. I’ll protect you from everything, I will pay for whatever your little heart desires.

— You don’t even know me.

— Maybe. But we’ll spend time together, ja?

— You’ll have to leave eventually. Not the…not the best relationships base.

— I’ll take you with me.

— And if I don’t want to?

— I can get away with many things. You’ll like living in a big house.

You are adorable like this – eyes big and watery, lips trembling as he proceeds to kiss you, hold your body close. He still needs to finish those documents and he can’t just have a normal civilian hanging around the base – he can have a spouse though.

Thinking about you with a ring on your finger is too much for him. And you, feeling the way his enormous bulge is throbbing on your ass through his pants, shivering with dread. Anticipation too – even for just a little bit,

— I still need a job. We don’t have many options here.

— I’ll pay you for whatever you need.

— What do you want in exchange?

He licks his lips before kissing you again. You both know the answer – even if you are too afraid to say it, and he is too excited.

— You.

— I…can we take it slow?

— But we’ll be together.

You are scared of him. You don’t want to be with someone from the military, soldiers are scaring you, big muscular men are scaring you, his whole existence with this terrified hood and concealed face is scaring you – then you look at your life again. Think about empty pockets and constant living in fear of either poverty, someone else hurting you, or terrorist attack – and then you look at König.

Money, power, influence. He promised to give you a big house, no?

You could at least try. Not like you have many other options.

— We…we will be. But with some boundaries, okay?

He chuckles, slowly starting to kiss your neck.

— Meine Liebe, do you really think you’re in position for this?

— Please?

— I’ll think about it.

You squirm under him as he gently pushed you on his table and slowly starts lifting your hoodie.

---------------------------- TAG LIST @shigbby @honeeybeezzz @herefornanami-s-cake @pendalikespasta @lucylou302 @yxllowtxpe @sunbathed-sweetgrass @sarah-ardini @teenagegever2k22 @lastwordsofadyingstar @lavenderskye29 @karrotsforyou @inlovewithcodmen @onegami @keithehe @lilahbunny @ameneminimo @beepyboopbop @ms-munchkin @dinonacho @undeadgod @dizeesstuff @mingkiiii @midwesternwitchery @yxllowtxpe @flammenwerferpanzerkampfhund @keithehe @iytatsworld @r02eg0ld @cumikering @ysljoon @m1ndbrand @captain-heebie-jeebie @bluenredndeath @elichisstuff @milenko115

#cod x reader #call of duty #cod x you #cod #konig mw2 #konig x reader #reader insert #yandere cod #yandere konig #yandere x reader #male yandere

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rabbitsrants · 7 months

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Could you tell me what's your opinion about kogoro,like you always appear like you hate kogoro that's why I wanted to know (whenever you mention him you tell that unbothered fuckin father) wanna know your opinion please answer my ask

fun question!

I LOVE KOGORO

with that being said, i have a very nuanced opinion on him

do i think he's a good detective, husband or father? NO, absolutely not. i don't even think he's a good guardian in regards to conan lol

kogoro can be very self-absorbed, impatient and superficial. his alcoholism and gambling addiction strain every aspect of his life, but kogoro doesn't seem to care enough to change

a few examples:

chapter 1

chapter 370

LIKE??? SHE HAS TO STUDY FOR HER MOCK EXAMS AND KOGORO CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO GIVE A FUCK LOL

initially, i blamed his attitude on his lack of success as a detective. but he shows signs of being irresponsible in his youth as well, despite working for the police:

chapter 572

even after shinichi saves kogoro's career and introduces him to a lot of fame, kogoro shows no willingness to change. he's chronically self-indulgent:

chapter 853

on top of that, the rare times that ran asks him to do something for her, he acts like it's a complete burden:

chapter 528

ran asks him to watch eri's cat while she's in school and kogoro tries to pass the responsibility on to conan

speaking of conan, kogoro repeatedly gets violent with him when he's investigating alongside him

chapter 12

the reason why it appears like i hate him is because my posts are mainly about shinran and interestingly enough, gosho decided to write kogoro as shinichi's polar opposite in a lot of ways. which he even admits in his own writing:

chapter 163

it's evidently a writing choice that gosho decided to go for on purpose. and i think that's fucking brilliant. think about it: ran growing up with an irresponsible, unreliable dad who often prioritizes drinking and gambling over his own daughter? and that same girl falling in love with a guy who's incredibly dependable, attentive, selfless and everything her father is not? IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE

so whenever i analyze certain shinran moments, it becomes glaringly obvious to me that shinichi often acts like an anti-kogoro, so to speak.

examples i already mentioned in my acts of service post: kogoro refusing to help ran - shinichi stepping up as a result in chapter 457 and 716.

additional examples:

chapter 192

kogoro drops off ran at this weird, isolated mansion for a meeting that sonoko arranged with a bunch of strangers online and he feels off about the whole thing and i'm like YES LOVE THAT, SHOWING GREAT PARENTAL INSTINCTS

he even warns one of the guys and i'm like YEAH YOU'RE BEING A GOOD DAD, LETS GO KOGORO

naturally, shinichi feels weird about the situation as well, so he insists on staying with his girl, even though it's already been discussed that he's too sick:

so, despite the fact that a) kogoro feels like something is odd about the meeting, b) he warns the guy to leave ran tf alone... HE STILL LEAVES HER AT THE MANSION UNPROTECTED

and i'm like... WHY????? and gosho immediately answers my question:

LIKE????????????????????? talk about bad parenting lol

anyway, turns out something about the meeting was indeed off and ran is potentially in danger. both shin and kogoro lose their shit:

but there's a key difference between kogoro and shinichi and i feel like gosho wrote this difference on purpose - nothing, and i mean absolutely NOTHING will ever stop shinichi from trying to keep ran safe:

ONE MORE EXAMPLE

chapter 347-349

the case barely even begins and shinichi immediately observes that ran isn't feeling well:

he even tries to convince her to ditch dinner and go back home:

when shit starts hitting the fan and ran is getting incredibly dizzy, kogoro doesn't even notice:

again, maybe i'm reading too much into it, but i think the fact that gosho depicts kogoro's ignorance in this situation is 100% by design and as a result shinichi gets to be the anti-kogoro again:

throughout the whole case shinichi worries about ran and tries to take care of her. which is very impressive considering that ran constantly tries to downplay her symptoms:

examples like this occur way too often for me to write them off as a coincidence. we're clearly dealing with a pattern. how could i not point that out in my analysis? especially when shinichi's unwavering loyalty towards ran is something that she gushes about constantly?

with all that being said, just because i regurarly point out kogoro's flaws as a dad, doesn't mean i hate him. it's just that i aim to reach a full, comprehensive conclusion with every analysis i write and that entails important details like the glaring differences between shinichi and kogoro regarding their treatment of ran.

i still adore kogoro. cause like i said, there's nuance. i feel like there's a lot of hidden depth behind kogoro's character that i wish gosho explored more:

he's smarter than people think

chapter 11

HE'S THE FIRST PERSON TO QUESTION CONAN'S REAL IDENTITY, EVEN BEFORE RAN:

chapter 165

to everyone's suprise, kogoro deducts that eri lost her wedding ring and he goes out of his way to find it for her:

there are more examples of him showing decent detective skills during certain cases but this post is already long enough lol so i'm not getting into that

he can be very idealistic

chapter 86

him holding an old and dear friend accountable for murdering someone:

chapter 376

him doing the same again with a childhood friend:

HE HAS HIS MOMENTS, OKAY?!

chapter 266

I LOVE IT when kogoro shows his vulnerable side, i find it so heartwarming:

chapter 986

OR HIS BADASS SIDE (this is him protecting eri from a guy who's about to sexually assault her)

WHAT A KING

and even though i shit on his parenting a lot he can be very endearing at times! examples:

chapter 207

his reaction to ran dreaming about the one time that shinichi asked her to give him her bra (it was for a case lol)

chapter 254

MY FAVORITE KOGORO MOMENT:

it's a small but incredibly touching gesture and i love him so much for moments like this

chapter 255

HE CAN BE SO SUPPORTIVE AND SWEET

chapter 765

even though i criticized him for his treatment of conan earlier, shinichi and kogoro have their moments as well. the ramen case is one of my favorite moments between them, it's just so wholesome!

this case is giving dad and son-in-law eneregy!

to sum up my very long response: kogoro is an overall shitty person but he can be very smart, idealistic and sweet and i wish gosho explored those aspects of his character more, cause i feel like he gets sidelined a lot. he often uses kogoro for comedic relief which is fair to a certain extent cause kogoro is HILARIOUS and makes me laugh all the time but gosho keeps giving the bigger and more meaningful plotlines to characters that I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT (looking at you amuro) and i think that's a fucking shame cause kogoro has a lot of potential

hope that answers your question! :)

visit the shinran library for more

#kogoro mouri #shinichi kudo #ran mouri #shinran #dcmk #case closed #detective conan #ship analysis

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flownwrong · 6 days

Text

chaotic ckr c6d squee propaganda (?) post

This, started half a year ago for @ds30below, was initially a general c6d short reviews post but kinda skewed majorly towards CKR's repertoire and wasn't too review-y. So I gave up on making sense and on including the non-CKR works. I don't know who the audience for this is, because I never give basic details for people who don't know about this stuff but say too much for those who do. I giffed what I could and tried to avoid what I know a lot about but haven't actually seen. Here goes.

Frank's Cock (1993)

Not much to say. It's only 8 minutes, it's beautiful and you should see it if you haven't. I won't spoil the subject, but you can likely guess. Watch it, cry a little. Then go watch some more of Mike Hoolboom's stuff, the vimeo link above is from his channel.

Two X-Files episodes (1994 – 1995)

Well, I haven't actually seen X-files since I was about fifteen and watched the like two seasons, and I remember none of it. I rewatched the two early episodes CKR appears in and they were fun. I did not watch the, the movie or whatever where he's doing the evil gay thing. But really, this one is on the list so I can show you this self-indulgent gif of him being Very Long:

Double Happiness (1994)

You shouldn't watch this one for CKR. I mean, you absolutely should see him here, looking like he's barely out of his teens and playing up the insecure act and having devastating chemistry with devastatingly beautiful Sandra Oh, but this is not why it's great. And it's really, really great. It's touching and funny and sincere. If you wanna have some feels about complicated family relationships and identity and growing up (at any point in life), you'll find them here.

Curtis's Charm (1995)

Don't regret watching it, can't recommend. Not gonna lie, I was emotionally affected. But I usually am by things as in-your-face bleak as this. Mostly, it's trying very hard to be smarter than it is, I think.

However: CKR's One Wild Curl is everything to me (see above, on the right. It was, like, actually curly. I was rendered speechless). And like two seconds of Hugh Dillon made me do a double-take, lol. Incredibly weird knowing this was shot like half a year before HCL began shooting. Feels like it must've been a decade earlier.

Hard Core Logo (1996)

I could make three separate posts about this one, so of course I have no idea what to say.

This one, you should watch for CKR, actually, he's something, but so is every single other aspect of this film. I wouldn't change a thing about it. It hits you like a 16 wheeler. Perfectly cast, unimaginably beautiful, hysterical and melancholy and disgusting and compelling.

Related recs:

A wonderfully fun article/retrospective/interview for its 20th anniversary a while back.

You should also absolutely read Hard Core Roadshow if you enjoyed the film. It's a book documenting the whole thing from conception to release. It touched me for its own sake, not just a backstage glance, full of love for the craft and the people and carrying this tangible bittersweetness about the heightened and fleeting nature of this kind of work.

(here, I feel compelled to include a quote from another c6d-related interview on Slings & Arrows, which I read after the book and went like man, it's really a universal experience isn't it.

Coyne: <...> But I also think, and this is my experience, what we were all experiencing, because we were all talking about our lives, our life in the arts — there’s something very melancholy about doing something you love, because it will never be good enough, it will always break your heart.

McKinney: Or it will be fleeting.

Coyne: It’ll be fleeting. You come together with people you feel passionately connected to and two weeks later they’re tearing down the sets.)

Quotes from the article and the book respectively include:

McDonald: So there was a kind of mutual dependency society with Hugh telling Callum, “Don’t worry, man, I got your back, I’ll tell you how high or low to wear your guitar, I’ll tell you how you should dress, I’ll tell you what you should drink…” and Callum was like, “I’ll tell you what hitting your mark is, I’ll tell you why they pull out fucking tape measures, I’ll tell you why you have to do it again, I’ll tell you about not overlapping dialogue..” and you know they clung to each other, like the other one was gonna fucking save them.

And:

A final gathering at the back of the tour bus with Bruce, Callum, Hugh, Bernie. We listen to the tape of HCL songs, all the way through, one last time. And we belt the words out. Bernie sings loudest, performing for Salerno's camera. Hugh and Callum sit back, looks of sadness. I get the sense that if they could do it, they'd chuck their lives and be Joe Dick and Billy Tallent forever. Callum leans to Bruce and says exactly what everyone else is thinking: "I don't want it to end."

There's much more to both texts than *gestures* the whatever those two had, but it certainly doesn't hurt.

And Xeriscape is the best HCL fic I've read. Granted, I read very few because it's not a source that creates in me a craving for fic. But this one perfectly matches the film's fucked up beauty with its language while also adding a quieter, more fraught layer of humanity that we only get glimpses of in canon and that perfectly fits John. 10/10, would recommend.

Anyway. Watch it. Read it. If you haven't. Otherwise, come scream with meeee! And go reblog my gifs or something. Idk.

Letters From Home (1996)

Mike Hoolboom strikes again, with another short. This goes into the "don't watch it for CKR, watch it because it's great" box. Yes, you will cry.

For Those Who Hunt The Wounded Down (1996)

Another bleak one! It sucked to watch, I mean, on purpose. There were a couple of very effective scenes. I really enjoyed the opening. They say the book is decent too, I haven't checked that out.

Actually, let's just switch back from coherent thought to undignified staring at his mouth with this one. What the fuck is that cigarette thing. I couldn't help myself.

Last Night (1998)

These gifs are not representative of the whole movie. There is more happening than CKR kissing or hugging people. He's also doing more than just kissing and hugging. It's all very... impressive.

Guess who's also here again? Sandra Oh! And say hi to Don McKellar, who is an absolute champion for writing/directing/starring. You'll be seeing more of him.

Another one for the "watch it for its own sake" box. Seriously, that late 90s indie stuff is banger after banger. It's so beautiful! Look at those colours! Look at those shots! It's very uneasy and charming and melanchioly and itself in the best way.

Twitch City (1998 – 2000)

Don McKellar is back to murder you with discomfort! Bruce McDonald lends a hand. Molly Parker is also here. And Daniel McIvor, who'd go on to direct, for example, Wilby Wonderful. It's a party. If you watched some stuff from above (or below) on this list, most faces and names will be familiar to you, tbh (another Hugh Dillon double-take happens).

If you liked Spaced, you'll love this. You might also love it because it commits to its weirdness with an admirable resolve and is genuinely hilarious. (Honestly, CKR's outfits alone warrant a watch.) The idiosyncrasy is definitely Don McKellar's doing 200%. It couldn't be more different from Last Night, but if you've seen one, you'll recognise the other.

Battlestar Galactica (2003 – 2009)

I don't think a person should be allowed to look this pretty in the sweaty-and-dying makeup in that light (this sentence probably looks very weird to those not under the CKR magic spell).

I don't know what to say about BSG because I really, really enjoyed early it initially, but by the middle of S2 it got... well, whatever that was. If you know you know, if you don't, still give it a go. You might get invested enough to suffer through it all, as I have been, slowly.

The unfortunate thing is that CKR got to be there mostly in the "what the fuck" years and not the "wow that's so cool" years. That, as you might be aware, is a pattern with him. But! When he was here, he was so genuinely, wonderfully creepy not in the typecast-baddy way, but in this slow, half-absent way, which really worked. You can also see him tortured a little, as a treat!! <3

Also, a wild John Pyper-Ferguson appears! If you're looking at him thinking you know him from somewhere but not immediately remembering, you'll figure it out, I believe in you. I was very happy to see him.

Wilby Wonderful (2004)

Another win for the put CKR in more good shit team!!! Guess who's here again? Sandra Oh! Also, Paul Gross. Don't watch it for him either though haha.

Another one for whoever wants to look at pushing against the weight of others' (or your own) expectations and growing into who you are or reconsidering who you are or finding meaningful connections with others even when you're kind of a mess and they are too.

Not nearly the first time CKR's gotten to play a queer character, but man, this one really is the heart of the in-universe community, and, through that, of the film. A rare chance to see him so far out of the prickly persona! He's just so solid and calm and there for others in this one and, and soft, ough. It's awesome.

By the way, if any of you have the commentary track or know someone who has, please drop me a line here or on discord (emotionalrisotto), I really wanna hear that.

Supernatural (2005)

I love Supernatural a lot. It was a formative experiences (albeit a very late one) and I owe a lot of my favourite stuff about fandom-ing to the buddies I met through it. I can't believe I'm telling you this (because who hasn't seen it, not because I'm reccing it), but you should really try it if you haven't. It's pretty rad.

I had no idea who this guy was when I saw that episode (the second ever one!), though. I simply cannot fathom what @nigeltde-fic felt when she first saw it. I think I personally got very lucky she didn't combust on the spot. It would've been unfortunate.

On a sillier note, CKR's character has weird tension with both Sam and Dean in this episode, which is par for the course. I personally think they should've... no, I shan't say it. You can probably imagine.

Californication (2008 – 2013)

I haven't actually seen it, lol (and I suspect I won't enjoy it, but I'm very curious and also CKR looks really really good).

The real reason for this one on the list is to share a fic rec. Really, it's a due South F/K fic featuring Lew Ashby. It's ridiculously hot and very satisfying in its romantic resolution, too (but then, I'm kind of big on selfcest. And consensual voyeurism. And pretend relationships when done like this. And sublimated yearning. Erm.)

Shattered (2010 – 2011)

I wish this never happened. I badly, badly wish this never happened. I can't turn back time, but I can warn those luckier than me: do not go there. Yes, even for this dude. You'll sleep better not knowing just what it is he was the EP on. And the only important part — the mascara — can be seen above (yes, the show does look that bad, it's not just the gifs).

Just kidding — I watched it, didn't I? You'll have fun hating it! Just prepare for industrial grade cringe, lower your expectations (No, lower. No, still lower than that. And just a bit more.) and you'll have a great time!

Star trek: Discovery (2024)

Or, as I call it, Star Trek: The Mediocre Show. Discovery S5 was... what it was, but it was a wonderful viewing experience — mostly thanks to the gang (@kittkatk and @feroxargentea especially!)

What a joy it is, to follow a show week by week, yelling and laughing and discussing the whole time. And giffing, too. I was very happy to contribute to the Disco fandom from my own little obsessive corner, and I was glad to see people adoring Rayner, haha.

He's a pretty neat character — very much a stereotype, yes, but with CKR's usual twist of odd vulnerability and weirdness. Also, I loved the ears. I miss the ears. The ears were great.

I even wrote a fic! Although it's not within my usual range to write for canons and universes I don't know well — and back then, I'd only seen S5 of Disco. It was a lot of suffering, and a lot of fun.

Closing thoughts

I'd really love the dude to get a better agent. And possibly better taste, but I realise that's a tougher ask. Seriously, it's been too long since he was in something majorly cool. I'm grateful to him, at least, for not making terrible music on the side. And I still have a lot of his back catalogue to get through, some of it even good, so there will be more insanity. Until then!

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g4l4xy-qu33n · 1 year

Text

Arcane Characters with an S/O that Loves Headpats/their Hair Being Played With <3

Characters included: Jinx, Vi, Caitlyn, Ekko, Viktor, Jayce, Silco, Vander, Mel, Sevika, Ambessa and Finn

A/N: Readers gender isn’t mentioned and can be whatever you would like. Their hair length isn’t mentioned either, and can also be whatever. This totally isn’t self-indulgent at all- Proofread by Nobody, and the tense changes a bunch but whatever. Also this isn't very long, I wanted to write this but had like no motivation.

Warnings: None! Just pure fluff and head pats :)

Jinx

When you told Jinx that you like head pats, she literally jumped at the chance to give you them

Jinx utilises her long nails and scratches your head with them

If she happens to just be walking by, she’ll pat or tap your head as she walks past

When cuddling, it’s nothing out of the ordinary for Jinx to kiss your head either

Jinx won't hesitate to bite your hair, and/or chew on it (it feels nice in her mouth)

Vi chuckled when you told her that you liked head pats

Since Vi has strong hands and arms, she can’t help it if she gets a little too rough when petting your head.

Vi tends to pat your head with quite a bit of force

She also enjoys ruffling your hair and making it all messy, no matter how long you spent on it

She likes scratching your head, even if she doesn’t have long nails

If stressed, Vi may occasionally gently pull on your hair

Caitlyn

Caitlyn was a tad flustered at the thought of patting your head, but she’d do anything to make you happy

She’s very gentle when petting you and runs her fingers down the back of your head

If she’s stressed, she may fidget with your hair by curling it around one of her fingers

You’re no stranger to receiving soft kisses on the back of your head when Caitlyn’s playing with your hair either

Ekko

Ekko was excited when you told him that you liked head pats, and had a goofy smile on his face for a little

Ekko knows that he has quite big hands, and isn’t afraid to use them when ruffling your hair

Like Vi, Ekko is strong, and may get a little too rough when patting your head if he’s zoned out

Ekko also isn’t embarrassed to tease you about liking head pats

Viktor

Viktor is a bit flustered after you told him you liked head pats, but as a scientist he isn’t opposed to trying new ways of affection with you

Just like everything, Viktor likes to take his time finding things out when trying something new, so at first his pats are soft and curious

Once he realises how you enjoy getting pet, then he will use that technique as much as possible

Eventually, Viktor warms up to the idea of planting soft kisses in your hair, but only occasionally, since he doesn’t want to spoil you too much

If he’s playing with your hair while he’s working, he may sometimes tap his fingers on your head in thought

Jayce

Jayce is completely fine with the idea of giving you head pats.

He loves it when you sit on his lap while he works, since then he has time to give you head pats.

Because of his big hands, it seems that his pats may be quite aggressive, but you would be mistaken

Jayce is gentle and soft when he pats your head

He may occasionally ruffle your hair (gently, as he doesn’t want to mess it up)

If he’s working, he would fidget with your hair

Silco

When you told Silco you like head pats, he scoffed and begrudgingly gave you them

In actual fact, Silco loves giving you head pats and does so whenever he can (which is most of the time)

He usually does long, slow caress like pats down the back of your head, which trail onto your neck.

He finds that the feeling of your hair on his palm and fingers is incredibly relaxing, and pats you when he’s stressed

He’d never say anything like that to your face though

Vander

Vander – as always – is completely open to the idea of giving you head pats, and immediately asked if you wanted any

Like Jayce, Vander may seem like his pats would be quite rough, but in actual fact, he’s incredibly soft and gentle with you

He would sometimes run his hand down your back as well as caressing your head

If you're feeling tired or sore, Vander would gladly massage your scalp during head pats

If you’re just joking around or having a laugh, Vander would ruffle your hair for fun

Mel

Mel is kind of surprised when you tell her that you like head pats, but is in no way opposed to the idea

When she actually started patting your head regularly, the feeling of your hair under her hand became a feeling she missed quite often

When Mel pats your head, she trails her fingers through your hair, and takes the time to carefully remove any knots that may be there

If your hair was intricately styled, Mel would take the time to make sure that she doesn’t mess it up by doing slow and gentle pats

Sevika

Sevika isn’t completely opposed to the idea of giving you head pats but whatever makes you happy?

She mainly just scoffs out of sarcasm and exasperation when you ask for head pats, but complies

She purposefully pats your head very rough and aggressive, no matter if it's styled or not

Sevika scruffs up your hair a lot, and uses her whole hand when she does it, making it all knotted

Sevika would also bonk you on the head for no reason

Ambessa

Ambessa gave you a small smile and quiet chuckle when you told her you like head pats

She mainly just messes up your hair, then fixes it over and over again

Ambessa also curls your hair around her fingers, which are quite big mind you-

She loves it when she makes your hair all fluffy and scruffy as well

Finn

Finn was shocked when you told him that you liked head pats, but immediately hid it and smirked

The pats that Finn does shouldn’t even be called pats, it more like he’s letting out his anger on your hair

He scruffs up your hair on purpose, and clenches it in his fist

Finn also tugs and pulls on your hair just for fun (and a little to annoy you)

He also may randomly just bonk your head with his hand or fist

tsym for reading this, it means so much to me!!! Also I'm open for requests for lists like these if you'd like to! (or a oneshot but I'm a bit too busy irl for those rn so you might have to wait a bit, sorry).

-galaxy <3

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hc-geralt-23 · 2 months

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Hey! Thank you for the likes! I see you have requests opened and I like the cut of your jib 🖤💚 I hope it’s okay if I send you one.

What about Prince Aemond reacting to a lover pulling a Nettles on him? IE not a drop of Targaryen blood, low class, but managing to tame a dragon.

"Deceived by Love: The Tale of Prince Aemond and the Commoner Dragon Rider"

Prince Aemond was a proud and arrogant man, as most of the Targaryens were. He had grown up in the luxury and privilege of the Red Keep, surrounded by the finest things and people. As the second son of the King, he was destined for a life of leisure and indulgence.

But then he met Y/n, a commoner with no drop of Targaryen blood in her veins. She was low class, with nothing but her wits and charm to rely on. Yet, somehow, she had managed to tame a dragon. A dragon that everyone thought could not be tamed.

At first, Aemond was intrigued by her. He had never met anyone like her before. She was not like the ladies of the court, who were all too eager to please and flatter him. Y/n was strong and independent, and she didn't care about his status or wealth. She saw him as a person, not just a prince.

They spent countless nights together, talking and laughing. Aemond found himself falling for her, despite all the warnings from his family and advisors. He didn't care that she was not of noble birth. Y/n made him feel alive in a way that no one else ever had.

But then, one day, he overheard a conversation between Y/n and one of her friends. They were discussing how Y/n had managed to tame her dragon, Nettles. Apparently, she had used a trick passed down from her family, who were dragon breeders. Aemond couldn't believe it. Y/n had tricked him, and she was not a dragon rider by her own merit.

Feeling betrayed and foolish, Aemond confronted Y/n. "Is it true? Did you use a trick to tame Nettles?" he asked, his voice laced with anger and hurt.

Y/n looked at him with sadness in her eyes. "Yes, it is true. But does it matter? I have proven myself to be a capable dragon rider. Nettles and I have fought alongside each other, and we have both come out victorious. Isn't that what matters?"

Aemond couldn't deny the truth in her words. But his pride was wounded, and he couldn't let go of the fact that Y/n had deceived him. "You are not of noble birth, Y/n. You do not belong in our world. You are nothing but a commoner, and you will never be accepted here," he said, his voice dripping with condescension.

Y/n's eyes filled with tears, and she turned to leave. "I may not have noble blood, but I have something more valuable - a heart that is true and a spirit that is unbreakable. Goodbye, Aemond," she said, her voice trembling with emotion.

As she walked away, Aemond realized the mistake he had made. He had let his pride and prejudice blind him from seeing the amazing person that Y/n was. He ran after her and stopped her in her tracks.

"Y/n, wait. I was a fool. I let my ego get in the way of seeing the incredible person that you are. I love you, and I will do everything in my power to make you mine," he declared, his voice sincere and full of regret.

Y/n turned to face him, and for a moment, there was hesitation in her eyes. But then she smiled, and Aemond's heart soared. "I love you too, Aemond. And I will hold you to your words. But you must remember, I am not some trophy to be won. I am my own person, with my own dreams and aspirations," she said, her tone firm and full of self-respect.

Aemond nodded, realizing that he had found someone who was not only beautiful and clever but also strong and independent. They embraced, and from that day on, they stood by each other's side, as equals, in a world where social class didn't matter.

#aemond targaryen x reader #aemond one eye #aemond drabble #house of the dragon hbo #hotd #aemond targaryen

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yangsharperavery · 8 months

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Hi :)

would you be willing to share your insights to the synastry of Jeremy and Ayo? Just curious!!

yes, i will!

sorry this took so long, i wanted to wait until after the emmy's and i'm glad i did. lol.

i don't know these people and you (probably) don't either this is all what the cosmos say + personal observation.

so i'm not an astrologer, by any stretch. but i've been studying it for a few years, have run several dozen personal natal charts and compatibility synastry natal charts simply out of my own curiosity during that time to learn more about the practice, pattern recognition, etc.

while time of birth helps with accuracy. you can learn alot just by birth dates and locations of birth.

just off running those things in synastry, they had 14 positive, compatible and "easy" or easeful placement markers. which is quite high.

the highest amount of those markers i've seen is 18. the average is typically 6-10.

neither of their times of birth are online but ayo recently revealed that her big 3 is libra (air), aquarius (air) and sagittarius (fire). while his is aquarius(air), aries(fire) and his third isn't publicly known (though some think it's gemini(air)).

having her sag rising tells me where jeremy's specific placements fall in her houses. houses are like personal themes: work, passions, travel, spouses, relationships, setbacks, etc. planets are like characteristics or life themes: communication, art, beauty, limitation, structure, intuition, etc.

to start... he's an aquarius sun and she's an aquarius moon. this automatically gives them compatibility because the sun represents your framework as a person, while your moon represents your emotions and how you feel about yourself, the world, etc.

he understands her emotional landscape, she understands his personal framework.

they're both air signs but she's more air than he is. he has more fire and water in his chart.

in an interview for the golden globes last year she talked about how jeremy taught her how to be still. which is interesting because air signs are very heady, intellectual, busy and sometimes flighty people.

their other positive synastry placements are trines (same elements) of her sun and his mars, her venus and his sun, her pluto and his venus, their mercuries, her mercury and his mars, her venus and his mercury, their jupiters, her saturn and his pluto, etc, as well as sextiles (aspected 60 degrees apart) of her sun and his jupiter, her uranus and his venus, her neptune and his venus, her mars and his neptune, her saturn and his neptune, and her pluto and his saturn.

those are just the placements of the elements/planets that are very cohesive, complimentary, magnetic or agreeable that it shows.

for a deeper explanation, that first placement means: her sun (self expression, assertion, will) aspects his mars (energy, impulse, aggression) in a way that is positive, soothing, affirming and motivating.

i won't do every single placement because then this would be a billion words but you get the idea.

what i find most fascinating is their most difficult or challenging placement being her saturn (containment, structure, and limitation) and his venus (harmony, love, beauty, and art). both in pisces (water).

that's challenging because saturn makes you work for everything and teaches you a bunch of lessons along the way. but in the end, if you master the limits and structure, you are rewarded. while venus is loving and giving and indulgent and gorgeous from beginning to end.

venus also rules partnerships. romantic and otherwise.

to add to that, ayo has a bunch of libra placements and libra is ruled by venus. this absolutely tracks because ayo is incredibly venuian which can be attributed to how glamorous and alluring and charming and charismatic she is.

i actually knew she was venuian before i even ran her chart because it just pours off of her.

anyways... that particular placement caught my eye because jeremy's falls in ayo's fourth house of home, family and unconscious past. while jeremy's aries moon (his emotions) fall in her fifth house of social life, creativity, pleasure and dating.

so them literally calling each other family and working on a creative project about such things that is highly emotional, while being tied to partnerships and art, is quite literally written in their chart synastry.

that's all i'm going to say about their natal charts for now...

the rest of what i'm going to comment on is just what i've seen over the past week in regards to their dynamic.

i really do think, it is mostly a tightknit, platonic, encouraging and loving, working friendship and closeness that they share.

and the only reason i say mostly is because outside of the general appreciation and glee and pride and happiness in their interactions amongst these celebrations...

there are these moments that lead to the renaissance painting picture at the golden globes and the giggling tactile shuffle at last night's emmys where i observe them sort of so easily trickling into and immediately out of their own little worlds and i'm like... hmm.

it really wouldn't surprise me if one or both of them has ever had a crush on the other. i'm not saying anything has ever happened or they have even acknowledged it. because who's to say?? and it's obviously nobodies business but just witnessing this past week on top of all i've already seen in their charts... idk.

i saw someone pondering on whether their legitimately very close friendship is the reason they were both so anti-sydcarmy becoming romantic in the past which hmm, again idk.

what i will say is that the way ayo responds to any suggestive context or implication regarding jeremy is VASTLY different than she is or has been with other costars and friends in the industry.

like i said this girl is heavily venuian so she's going to flirt and charm and compliment others in a loving, overt way all the time. look at any of her interactions with rachel sennott, havana rose liu, natasha leone, ramy youssef, just to name a few off the top of my head.

the constant calvin klein stuff was incredibly over referenced and obnoxious after awhile but to think that reporters aren't gonna bring it up at all, especially after it had just gone viral two days prior is a stretch.

maybe as a little mention at the end of the interview is understandable. but blowing up the photos poster board size was, i agree, pretty ridiculous.

i love how she protected him from the overly specific body issue questions during one interview but i feel like the way she physically recoiled during another interview's mention of it felt like an overcorrection or even a tiny, in real time self boundary setting.

not for the interviewer but for herself.

because if it was a sexy campaign with any of the other people i just mentioned, i feel like she woulda been the first person to say they looked so good or they worked so hard or to praise them or whatever.

so it is fascinating to me that it's so different with what she's willing to be on record saying about jeremy.

like girl, i saw rami fake kiss you, natasha actually kiss you and you and havana and rachel flirted intermittently during bottoms press (which was v cute!)

so again the obvious difference makes me tilt my head a little bit.

also i don't recall ebon or lionel or matty or anybody else we've seen her around this past week have their hands on her waist so relentlessly. and i don't recall a smidge of abby or liza's foundation on jeremy's white jacket!

but what do i know?!?!!?

#sydcarmy #i'm not even gonna tag them #maybe i'll learn brevity in another life

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zoeykallus · 1 year

Note

Hi Zoey! How are you? I know you are a Tech girl and so am I. I thought maybe you can give us Tech girls some fun and fluff? Any scenario you want. I'm aware that you work a lot these days and don't have much time for writing anymore, and you are still drowning in requests, but maybe some self indulging Tech Fluff makes your day? Maybe something related to any holidays coming up around the time you get to read this? Take care of yourself, don't let anybody or anything get you down 💕

Aloha!

You know, this requests dates back to July, and Halloween is coming up. Not sure if I should laugh or cry about that 😅 And yeah, it's still the same. I'm sorry I'm so late with this!

Okay, that's actually really sweat, some Halloween themed Tech Fluff 🧡 Thanks for this request 😊🧡

Tech x Fem!Reader One-Shot - A First Date With Tech On Halloween

First Date/Shy Tech/Fluff/Slightly Suggestive/Shy Idiots In Love

________

Ko-Fi (If you feel like giving me some coffee)

________

>Master List<

He flinches as a hand lands heavily on his shoulder. Tech sighs softly and turns to face the owner of the hand. "Crosshair," Tech says, more or less surprised, pushing his goggles up the bridge of his nose with his index finger. "What are you wearing?" asks Crosshair who critically furrows his brows and gives his brother a questioning look. "A costume," Tech says matter-of-factly. "Yeah, I can see that, but why? Isn't tonight your first date with that chick you've had the hots for over months?" Tech looks at the Sniper and shakes his head, "Hots for her? I wouldn't call it that." Crosshair smirks, "What do you call it then?" Tech shrugs and says, "I admire her. I like her, her smile, the way she talks, her good heart." Crosshair laughs softly and says, "Oh, so you just so sneakily stole her shirt when we were all together at the beach, and regularly smelling it, hiding it under your pillow, because you totally just like her to a normal degree?" Tech freezes, blinks several times. He's an incredibly bad liar and when he answers his voice is way too high. "I don't know what you mean" Crosshair snickers. "Sure. Anyway," he says, pointing at Tech's outfit, "That still doesn't explain the costume"

Tech wears a black suit, cape and leather gloves, in his mouth a perfectly fitted, homemade set of fangs. "It's Halloween, when we were talking about it the other day she said she loves Halloween, the costumes, decorations, scary movies, well everything that goes with it." "And you're going as a vampire?" asks Crosshair critically. Tech smirks with one of the fangs briefly showing. "Not just any vampire," Tech says with a gloved, raised finger, "Dracula, the most powerful of all vampires." Crosshair crosses his slender arms in front of his chest and raises his brows. "Is there any particular reason for this choice?" Tech smiles dreamily and says, "The myth of the vampire is probably the most romanticized, I just hope she likes it." Crosshair laughs softly and says, "I think you mean sexualized." Techs ears turn red as he replies, "No, I didn't mean that at all" "Of course not" the Sniper replies sarcastically, shoving a couple of condoms into Tech's jacket pocket, "Anyway, just in case" Tech frowns, getting hot and cold. The thought alone makes him super nervous. He takes the condoms back out of his pocket and puts them on the shelf next to the sink. "I'm definitely not going to need these on a first date". Crosshair picks up the condoms and says, "Definitely not with that attitude. Either way, I wouldn't rule anything out if I were you, Dracula" and puts them back in Techs pocket again.

But Tech takes them out again and puts them back on the rack. "Don't do that. She's a decent woman, and I want to do this all right. No condoms on the first date," he grumbles, adjusting his goggles again. Crosshair rolls his eyes and says, "Let me guess, you've been reading another one of those guides that you're sticking to now?" Tech's ears turn red again, and he asks defiantly, "So what? I lack experience, what's wrong with getting some tips and information?" Crosshair grabs him by the shoulders and says emphatically, "Get it from me, not from the holonet" Tech sighs and says, "No offense, but your acquaintances rarely last longer than a weekend." "Because that's what I want," the Sniper grumbles. Tech sighs, "But I want... something real, lasting, something genuine, not a short adventure" Crosshair smiles and says, "She must be something special if she can coax uptight Tech out of his hiding place" Tech says indignantly, "I'm not uptight.... just a little shy and maybe a little picky" "And insecure, shy as a little baby and a virgin and-" Tech interrupts him angrily, "Stop it! You're making me more nervous than I already am!" Crosshair smiles mildly and says softly, "Sorry. Don't worry about it, you'll be fine, I'm sure the date will be great"

"You really think so?" asks Tech uncertainly, tugging at his clothes. "Yes, but only if you're on time for the date." Tech looks at his watch, startled. "Oh my gosh, I have to go!"

When Tech rings your doorbell, and you open the door for him, he looks breathless, as if he's been sprinting. He's a minute early, so he's not really late. You look him up and down. He looks great, his slender body in the black suit and cape. As he smiles at you, you also see the fangs. "What is this handsome vampire doing at my door?", you ask, playfully dramatic. You see his ears turn red and his smile widen a little. Then he shows his fangs for a second and says just as dramatically, "I came to have a taste of the supposedly sweetest blood there is, the blood of an angel"

You both chuckle and blush a little, while Tech nervously rubs the back of his neck.

Tech eyes you and your costume and smiles. "You look great," he says softly, "Very in character for you."

You wear a delicate white dress, little angel wings and a halo made of wire and gold foil. You have long thought about how you should dress up. Finally, you decided that you wanted to appear lovely and unobtrusive and chose this costume. "Thank you," you say, smiling broadly.

Tech wants to give you something.

At first, you think he's holding out a bouquet of flowers, but it's a lot of different Halloween candy, creatively arranged into a colorful bouquet that just looks like a bouquet of flowers. "Clever," you say delightedly, and accept the present with a smile on your face. "What a lovely idea!" Tech straightens, proud and pleased that both his costume and his token are well received by you. He enters the apartment after you invite him in. Your apartment is relatively dark, lit only by many small jack-o'-lanterns and a string of skeleton lights that snakes along the ceiling throughout the apartment. The whole apartment is decorated and the smell of a wonderful pumpkin soup wafts in from the kitchen. He follows you and can hardly believe his luck, his heart beating up to his neck as you grab his hand and gently pull him with you into the kitchen. You eat the soup together by candlelight and keep smiling at each other. Tech is unaccustomed to silence, but he smiles much more than usual, and your heart melts every time he shyly avoids your gaze only to look back at you. "This is delicious," he says, enthusiastically agreeing to a second serving. After dinner, you go into the living room where there are already two plates of cookies you baked yourself, in the shape of Halloween pumpkins with orange icing and in the shape of ghosts with white icing. Tech looks at your movie collection in amazement, you have tons of them on Holodisc, a huge shelf of them, most of them scary and horror movies from 'family friendly 'barely legally available'.

"You're really into Halloween and scary movies," he says with a smirk. "Do you want to pick the first movie?" you ask him. Tech spreads his arms and says, "If you'll bear with me, I'd love to. This is a huge collection, I'll have to take a closer look." Of course, he has his holopad with him and uses it to help him choose. He chooses an older film with practical effects. And during the movie, dear Tech slowly wakes up from his shy silence. He enthusiastically explains how most of the effects work and even bravely puts an arm around your shoulders when you get startled during one scene, not knowing you just played the scared girl. As Tech gestures wildly with his free arm to explain things, something falls out of his pocket and onto the floor. You both bend down and grab it at the same time. Three condoms. Tech's eyes are suddenly huge behind his goggles as you look at him. "Condoms?" you ask, surprised. "They're not mine," Tech blurts out in near panic. "You carry around other people's condoms?" you ask, raising an eyebrow in amusement. Tech hastily straightens up and puts the condoms back in his jacket pocket.

"Crosshair," he mumbles to himself, looks at you and says, "My brother must have slipped these into my pocket when I didn't notice. They're really not mine. I didn't have any ulterior motives, I promise. Except for the arm around your shoulders and maybe a chaste goodnight kiss, later." You smile, suppressing a grin. He was adorably cute looking at you, so nervous and shy. "Okay." "Okay?" he asks softly. " That means I believe you, Tech." He smiles in relief, leans back again and gently puts his arm around your shoulder once more. "Are you okay?" you ask quietly. "Of course, everything's fine," he says hastily, tightening his shoulders. A little calmer he adds, "You know, I want to do this right, our date, that thing between us. I'm not interested in rushing into anything or having a fleeting adventure." You lean against him and put your arms around him, whereupon he lets out a shaky breath.

He suddenly laughs softly, as if getting rid of some nervous tension. "I like that," you say quietly, leaning against his chest. "Very good," Tech says contentedly, "Then nothing can get in the way of that good night kiss later." You grin to yourself and say softly, "Perhaps even two kisses?". Tech clears his throat and says just as softly, "That's not really customary as far as I know, but we could make an exception"

@rintheemolion

@andyoufollowyourheart @clone-whore-99

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@misogirl828 @tech-deck

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aihoshiino · 8 months

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The Idol MV in general is absolutely befuckened with imagery I could spend days dissecting but I think the one that makes me the most Actively Insane, especially in the wake of 131 and 137 is this:

To the best of my knowledge this is basically the one and only time in the entirely of Oshi no Ko that we have gotten this close to overt Ai fanservice. The only other times I can think of are the split second acknowledgement of The Existence Of Her Boobs in volume/episode 1 but they go by so fast and are framed in such a comedic, even matter-of-fact way that it's hard to read them as particularly titillating (heh). This is very interesting given that the entire foundation the series is built on is (as I've said before) the friction between idol culture's fantasies of pure virgin girls and the reality of Ai as a person who has sexual desires and agency.

By contrast, this is overtly, effusively titillating (heh). It's drawn very much like typical anime fanservice with a focus on emphasizing the softness of her body and especially her breasts with how they're squished up against her arm. And yet… it's ALSO framed in an incredibly ominous light. She's backlit which casts most of her body in shadow and her hands are framing her face in a way that is clearly intentionally reminiscent of the yandere trance/Yuno Gasai pose. And she's layered with yellow caution tape that implores the viewer to KEEP OUT. Everything about this is so implicitly threatening and intimidating, at least in the framing.

This is the one singular time in all of Oshi no Ko that Ai is framed in such an explicitly sexual light — the one and only time she is shown to us as an adult woman who might have sexual ideas — and everything about the imagery and presentation of it screams that this is BAD and SCARY and WRONG. KEEP OUT.

Which is the entire point, isn't it? The idea of Ai Hoshino just existing as an adult woman with sexual agency is a threat to the existence of the pure and perfect idol, Ai. That's why she had to be destroyed.

I've said this off tumblr as a joke but I am becoming increasingly more serious in my belief that healthy and loving sex with a person who cares about her would fix so many of the things wrong with Ai's brain. So much of the self hate and anxiety that spurs her self destructive behavior is tangled up with internalized slut shaming and fucked up ideas about sex and sexuality enforced on her by idolhood and purity culture as a whole. Having good sex with a person who loves her, who lets her be dirty and greedy and self indulgent in something Bad and Wrong for an idol to do and accepts and loves her as she is regardless… well, if nothing else, I think it would calm her down a little. get that dick girl!!!!!!!

#oshi no ko #oshi no posting #ai hoshino #inducting everyone on tumblr into my Ai Hoshino Get Dicked Down agenda #i think she deserves it more than anybody else on planet earth

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dxxtruction · 23 days

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"You think I need to be coddled, hyped up, lied to?"

This could be taken a few ways obviously but one of them is that these are things Louis does for Armand because he needs them. And he probably throws this out because he knows Armand well enough to know he has a habit of assuming others think and want exactly the same things as him. If the interview wasn't a clear example Armand's too insecure - about himself and their relationship - to just sit with the harder truth, or take the truth from others. Vulnerability is very hard for him. Him revealing himself at all at the end of season 1 is based on an assumption of his that Louis is the same way. That Louis needs, or wants, exactly what he needs, or wants. That Daniel should be ashamed of mocking Louis pain, because he wouldn't want that for his own. (And to an extent that's not a terrible assumption, but to override Louis own feelings on it, when he wants to be confronted with the hard truth even if it is in a mocking way, it is kind of ... yeah.)

To explain this? He's adapted so much to what others want and need of him to be, he probably still thinks he's adapting to it, or needs to, so doesn't quite get these aren't his own wants and needs being expressed. He does a lot of projecting, and also, by caring for Louis he almost lives vicariously through him as sort of a measure for his own self worth. (This can be incredibly suffocating.) Armand does a lot of based on assumption thinking, and I want to say this stems from a disorganized attachment. With uncertain caregivers you have to be prepared for everything changing at a moments notice. So, will need to make assumptions and future predictions to protect yourself from that uncertainty.

But anyway like, if he's not coddled in those, seen perhaps more favorably than he deserves, and more over, allowed to think a lie for the both of them, its at which point it's him who acts out given how insecure in himself he is. If torturing Daniel isn't a clear enough example. And I think Louis tries to indulge this because he sort of understands Armand's just very broken and feeding his insecurities unnecessarily isn't going to help much. He knows Armand was always around for him, and stuck by whenever is was him acting out instead (Even if Armand was always at the root of why he ever was acting out). Max level of empathy Louis strikes again. But draw a line where a line needs to be drawn. Louis will just not compromise for Armand on everything, and will not accept a flat out lie being told if he's not also in on it.

They both know this relationship, by all means, was not supposed to ever work. And the fact they tried at all is almost a lie in itself. A tell yourself something till it's true, situation. But in this instance it can't ever become true, because one or both of you can't actually let it or get to that point honestly.

#Am I really out here analyzing singular lines from this show now? yes #loumand #iwtv #louis de pointe du lac #armand #interview with the vampire #relatedly Louis might view Armand as weaker for needing those things and wants to position himself as above all such weakness.#(read) above all weakness to the point of even distancing himself from the very concept of being a victim #Which he soon changes when realizing the lie of that is actually a show of weakness and to actually own up to it is much stronger #So the suggestion of needing those things too (even if he does) feels like a overly personal attack if he has this grand image to maintain.#Whats funny then with that is he personally coddles hypes up and lies to himself to maintain said self image whether he realizes this or no #And so maybe he's projecting that onto Armand there.

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thedrarrylibrarian · 8 months

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Have you ever had a day that just went completely to shit? That was the entire month of November for me. I had planned to have this Happy Hour ready then, but between work and home life and hosting for the holiday and everything else...a ball had to drop. I was so disappointed, because I love doing Happy Hour and I love speaking with the creators who help with the guest fic recs.

@ihopeyoubothstaysafefromharm could not have been more gracious and understanding about postponing his rec. I always thought his artworkand fics were lovely, but being on the receiving end of the his kindness makes the works even lovelier to me. I love that even in moments of violence, he portrays characters as vulnerable and soft, the gentleness of moments of solitude, and the joyfulness of the mundane. If you haven't checked out Joy's art before, I cannot recommend it enough.

So after waiting for several months, I am finally so excited to share his incredible fic rec. Our first Happy Hour guest rec of the year is by the lovely and gracious @ihopeyoubothstaysafefromharm.

Outside of things that become fanon, we all travel the worlds of transformative works building up our own personal sense of canon. A lot of that process is wish fulfillment and self indulgence on little pleasures and minor vanities, which is what carves out this perfectly molded comfort that we all shelter ourselves in, what comes together to broadcast our unique wavelengths of bliss. But there is also another part of the process, one that I find myself unconsciously engaging in at times, which is an attempt to rewrite, rewire, recolor the places in which the source material has dulled, or to find cracks and fissures for interpretations that will allow me to engage with the source more meaningfully in the long run while honoring the directions in which I’ve grown and changed. There’s been a lot of work in the Harry Potter fandom that took on the form of a kind of hermeneutics, or that used the setting and characters as a kind of convenient vehicle to make a point about The Real World, in a way that sometimes makes it feel like we, the naive and spirited readers of the source material are somehow distant from the world and must be gently pulled back into it in the language of our distraction. Harry Potter and Welcome to the World of Grey was the first AU retelling of a larger segment of the HP canon where I felt like I was encountering something completely new, something that had the distant shape of these previous approaches at first glance but that, right from the first page, has that almost physical pull of the complete and precious new.

Harry Potter and Welcome to the World of Grey by @sobsicles (456,640 words, rated E)

When Harry fails to keep his anger at bay and Voldemort possesses his mind, the events that follow lead him down a long road to realizing the world isn't as black and white as it seems.

Chaos, hilarity, and tragedy ensue with a Dark Lord being honest all the time, a rival becoming something else, and a world demanding to be saved. Featuring frightened Death Eaters, deep conversations with a monster, Pureblood traditions being ridiculous, and the fight to do the right thing with no true options.

Harry's life just gets more and more bizarre with each passing moment.

Or, the one where Harry's life gets split in half, and he has to figure out how to bring it back together.

The summary is immediately gripping, and I’ll leave the reader to discover the shapes of the AU on their own, but the basic premise of the story is that Harry, at the end of 5th year, does something he would never do in the book, and that as a consequence of (?), or despite (?) or alongside (?) this, him and Voldemort begin to, on a relational and intellectual level, engage in a way that would otherwise be impossible. This story works on so many levels, all of them incredibly crafted and so masterfully sustained over the behemoth length of the first installment. The Harry in this story is funny and young and troubled in the most delicious ways all the while wading in and out of the crushing solitude of predetermination (and also maybe just humanity). I generally read exclusively fics in which they’re adults, or at least on the brink of adulthood in 8th year, but the author has crafted such incredibly convincing teenage characters in both Harry and Draco here that by the end not only do they both end up under your skin but they also become these people that sit alongside you, whose adolescence you’ve literally gone through as both a sympathetic spectator and as a mirror of them, drawn into the irresistible sweet delights of their love, the painful bonding of people captive in their lives, the hope of the future born out of surviving something together.

There is also a tendency in fics to paint the adults of the HP world as traitors, because that’s what the majority of them are, and this is something I also usually engage with. In this fic, while we maintain that the state of the world and the fates that befell all our favourite characters are largely the result of a kind of treason of goodness and responsibility, we also get to have these incredible deep insights into why each adult character is the way they are, through relations made possible only by this unlikely scenario that the author proposes. We also get to have the warm joy of seeing a child empathize with (and pity, and comfort, and teach) people who they owe nothing to, and this is an absolute treasure that shines brighter as we move through the story.

Finally, as this is Happy Hour, apart from all the things I’ve briefly mentioned up there that make this fic a delightful and comforting experience that I constantly go back to, I wanted to talk about a strange way that made this story become my source of comfort. This story made me like Voldemort. Not the terrifying and irredeemable one from the books or the movies. There’s this feeling that I have about fics and fandom, and I think it’s shared by a lot of people who’ve been around for a while, and it’s that these characters and settings and storylines are almost… nebulous things that always existed in us and around us and that we had maybe some slight hope for, but that were first snatched out of non-being and formed by the source material authors. This is also just how art and creativity is, in general - an antenna that beams signals and sometimes someone gets the whole message first. And you grow up and sometimes things are shaped by the source material to make you think oh I’ll feel this way forever and then of course you change your mind, but this was more like an intense, emotional journey in which I realized there was all this personal negativity that I’d always shove into this concept and this being - and that when I encountered the newly formed shape that this author’s Voldemort takes on, my resentments and my fixed darknesses, once unmovable and heavy at the bottom of this big thing in my life, were suddenly things I could walk up to. That the previously unapproachable veil of evil - which is simple, and undebatable - had lifted, and suddenly I could decide to do something else with them, to pick them up and carry them or throw them away, or live alongside them as awkward housemates until suddenly the shame and fear they represented wasn’t something I had to run from. So for happy hour, I picked a story that made me, and continues to make me, engage with not only happiness but a kind of lasting adult joy that comes from letting something come in and help you redraw the city lines of your own story. It’s very precious to me. I read the entirety of this fic in two days next to the crisp Adriatic sea, but I’ve reread it in many settings since then, and it’s always made me both hungry and full in the way that good home cooking does. I hope it does the same for you too.

#ihopeyoubothstaysafefromharm #friends of the library #Happy hour #the drarry library happy hour #Friday Happy hour #Harry x draco #Harry potter #draco malfoy #drarry #the drarry librarian #thedrarrylibrarian

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