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#this is only talking about the women too just bc ppl only say this about women
cerayanay · 1 year
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No guys don’t worry this young woman’s celebrity is going to be totally different. No yeah we’re going to do it right this time, she’s totally not going to be exploited at all. No i promise it’s different this time this teenager is totally in charge of her career, she’s not made to do anything. Yeah we promise we’re going to make sure this rapid rise in fame and complete stripping of privacy is not going to do any long term damage this time, she’s going to be totally fine this time
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dykeinthedark · 6 days
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venting in tags about gender n shit (long as hell) (u can comment and talk 2 me as always :3)
#okay so i got a really masc haircut about a month ago and i know it's just a haircut but holy shit has it changed EVERYTHING for me#like.... i've always leaned masc except 1) before i came out 2) when i was actively in love with someone who i knew liked femmes#and they always described me as a fem. because that's what i showed her. because i wanted to be with her.#but lowkey whenever i'm in a not-impressing-anyone raw-dogging-life-no-crush era i always resort to a very masc style#like masc being my default and i'd only lean fem to impress people whether it's for love or peer pressure in a specific setting#like ''dressing up'' has always been a form of drag to me. like something i HAD to do to fit in or impress my parents (scott favor core)#but ever since this haircut i've realized... i could just BE masc innately like i really don't have to be womanly if i don't want to#which i usually don't. again i have only ever dressed fem for other people. but it's not even being masc that attracts me on its own#it's like. being masc in a distinctly lesbian way. as in whenever i look in the mirror i don't wanna be like a Guy i wanna be a dyke.#like lesbian as a gender identity too sort of thing honestly. okay i've been waffling but basically i sort of want to call myself butch#but i don't know if i like... can?? if i'm allowed to???#everyone always says it's MORE than just wearing boy clothes and not wearing makeup and having short hair (which i already do all those)#i mean i've always id'd as genderqueer because it literally just means gender weird and i experience gender in a queer way#what's probably the most telling is that my friends (all queer) CALL me a butch lesbian#like every time they do i feel really internally validated. it's not just my clothes but my personality too ig is what people tell me#i have a higher pitched voice relatively speaking but apparently the way i talk is quote ''very clockably into women''#which?? gender euphoria asf. my best friend specifically he (gay trans guy) always uses butch to describe me very intuitively#people have also noticed that i ''transitioned'' in all aspects except hormonally. like ppl have commented and noticed my masculinzation#but at the same time i always feel rly haunted by my ex relationships because one wanted me to be more masc#(she's the one who came out as straight and would treat me like a man) which i didn't like and i didn't like playing up being fem either#bc now it feels like she (butch) won't believe me if i called myself butch too bc she remembers me being femme#idk i feel like there's her voice in my head all the time that sees everything i do through her eyes (i'm lowkey still in love)#i feel like even though this comes so naturally to me i must be putting on a performance#even though i've actually read stone butch blues and done research into the history and i truly love and id with the culture like i rly do#that im still just a sad imitation of a butch lesbian and can never really be a part of it because i used to enjoy dressing up sometimes#like it's so stupid but can i still be butch if i wore a dress to prom and i think i looked good in it??#even though i was envious of my friends who wore suits?? that i used to try goth makeup?? that i liked long dresses??#that i enjoyed stacked necklaces and rings on every finger???#and tbh ALL OF THAT CAME FROM A CONCIOUS EFFORT TO FEMINIZE MYSELF IN JUNIOR YEAR OF HIGHSCHOOL WHEN I WAS 16#because omfg it was 2 months before junior prom and i was worried that i was too masc and wanted to get comfortable with being fem
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gracehtml · 10 months
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i popped into twitter for a second, saw ppl hating on leliana (out of jealousy) in the replies of a tweet and hopped right out.
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artemis-lesbian · 2 years
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My grandma is so close to putting 2 and 2 together that I'm gay and I'm fucking terrified
#was going to dinner w my mom her bf and my grandma#i have an undercut and have for like over a yr but ig this is the first time ive had my hair up around my grandma???#and she saw my hair and was like what did you to your hair? yk ive seen dyke women w hair like that on tv#and my mom was like um idk if that means what you think it means and my gma was like yea like a tomboy gay woman#and she turned to me and was like i dont mean that to be derogatory toward you im not talking about you thats just the only place ive seen#hair like that. and id been dead silent the whole time and like frozen and when i checked my heart rate on my watch a min later#it had absolutely SKYROCKETED. my gma literally sent me into fight or flight lmao#and i was like oh maam if only you knew your one and only grandchild is indeed just like the dyke with the undercut on tv#but ive so rarely heard the term ive only heard once before like in person when my step sis and her friend said it once#and that time it made me silently freak out too but they didnt say it maliciously#but idk i think my grandma kinda did but idk her stance on lgbt ppl but given that shes a conservative republican christian boomer#im gonna assume shes homophobic id be suprised if she wasnt tbh#so yea thats how my night went. getting sent into a state of sheer panic by my grandma bc i was like fuck this is when she realizes im gay#but nope shes oblivious that im 23 and never had a bf or talked abt boys and i tend to dress as androgynously as i can given that im fat#and now the undercut. but she knows nothing lmao. or maybe she thinks it but doesnt say it#alex.gay
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wanghedi · 1 year
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um president biden we need sanctions against china immediately can we send some warning shots i just saw someone on bilibili say under a video of zendaya that “americans are just being politically correct when they say shes out of tom holland’s league cos OBVIOUSLY we all know tom holland is better looking than her" and that was the Popular opinion... the white = better notion is so ingrained that it even applies to zendaya and her five foot nothing british orphan core boyfriend its BEYOND sick. i really thought there would be more conflicting voices bc we all have eyes but racism is literally so powerful
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livinahey · 4 months
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aaaaaastrobs-essions (jk) .・゜゜・
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i'm back :)
.・。.・゜✭・.・。.・゜✭・»»————>
if you struggling with low self esteem go to fire sun/earth mars/venus in angles (1h/4h/7h/10). They will cheer you up and remind you that you deserve fine things in life 💅✨🧚‍♀️ just dont fake your insecurities to them or theyll disgusted by you
speak of self esteem, someone that have their asteroid medusa (149) in your 2nd are the one that silently judge and mock you. the one that try to attack your self esteem. the one that underestimate you; and will start to think "whats cool about them?" if you get great achievement in life. EVEN think that you dont deserve that and it should be them because they think theyre way much better than you 😹😹 what a bitch. beware of them try to steal your great things as a result ‼️😒👹💥💥
asteroid nemesis (128) in house shows ab whats hurt you then you develop animosity/hatred to it, check the theme of the house
1h - hatred towards self identity, hatred towards how people see you, you can hate your looks :(
2h - hatred towards possessions. You may lacks of material possessions, feel less than others in that area and you hate it
3h - hatred towards sibling, neighbor
4h - hatred towards family
5h - hatred towards "spotlight", flings, drama, childlike spirit
6h - hatred towards coworker, health (you may feel youre less healthy than others)
7h - hatred towards partner (✋💀💀), partnership itself. you likely wanna do everything alone
8h - hatred towards mystery. you hate it when someone hides something from you, not clear ab something, keeping something from you, being secretive
9h - hatred towards um.... tw religions. sorry you probably hate particular beliefs. hatred towards travelling, inlaws are also possible
10h - hatred towards public image, fame. you can hate public figures, famous person 😹😹 (im laughing because yeah we all know public figure often are not what they show on the media aka theyre fake)
11h - hatred towards friend, hatred towards what you see on internet. can be indicator of someone that dont like to use social media, or you give hate speech/comments on social media
12h - hatred towards whats "out of reach"
cardinal moons are pure souls that surrounded by "darkness". they can easily influenced by negativity from their surrounding so they MUST, i say MUST to keep good ppl around them or....bye (aka they can turn themselves into the evil)
what's with sag venus and having interest in things that they shouldnt be interested to
taurus women have this fiery strong badass facade to them, while the men looks like cute puppy (and wise???) lmao (for sun moon mars)
mutable mercury in first decan (0°-9°) why are you like to lie for no reason. are prone to say what they dont really mean. go seek better hobbies!
some of leo sun men are gay but they hide it by having love relationship with women... that's very weird (and irritating) of you
undeveloped earth venus only falls for/want to dating popular goodlooking mf even if in personality wise theyre not that best and it can leads to unfulfilling relationship 💁‍♀️
talk ab earth venus, i see them always fall for fixed sign venus (no im not referring them fixed venus as bad one that i mentioned above)
developed earth venus? they dont need to be with someone to increase their status, they simply being the (true) great person they are 🤩 (they know how to and do get the good life by themselves!!)
what i like ab fire moon is theyre so passionate but sometimes it can be too passionate where it leads to them making unnecessary drama 😭😭
water suns are prone to being delusional 😹😹
air venus stop giving mixed signals
i cant help but think ab where sagittarius in your chart shows what's "wild", "crazy" about you. thats why pluto in sag generations being seen as scary bcs the power (pluto rules ab power) they have.... 😹😹
moon-neptune aspects 🤝 say something then regret it
libra big 6 placements 🤝 attract petty ppl (and then get attacked, being seen as bad one when they just want to defend/protect themselves :()
undeveloped fixed moon 🤝 being petty
pluto in earth house (2h/6h/10h) are the brat but loved lmao
aqua mars 🤝 makes ppl amazed
air sign jupiter give the vibes of unstoppable teenagers (in a good way). see blackpink lisa (aqua jupiter), nct jaemin (gemini jupiter), newjeans hanni (libra jupiter), or another air sign jupiter you know! 😉
saturn-sun aspect are prone to experience unexpected loss :(
there's nothing more i hate in synastry than squaring to venus aspect... bc i feel unwanted there 🧍‍♀️🪓
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dyemelikeasunset · 5 months
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I can't sleep so I'm venting. for the most part i love my d&m readers, but oml sometimes i get qpoc blues so bad 😭😭
It's just liiiike. ppl either don't talk about Mor or completely misinterpret her personality. Like I can always tell if my readers are black or not because nonblack readers no NOT see Mor's significance, or just miss the mark when they talk about her, or they misread her personality. Like I don't understand what's so hard to understand about a cute and thoughtful artist??
AND LIKE LMAO Dom's sexuality gets brought up all the time but no one talks about Mor being a lesbian and how rare that is to find in media 😭 white lesbians are always talking about "we need more open lesbians in media!! ppl shouldn't be afraid to use the word lesbian!! blah blah" and i'm like "here you go!!" and no one claps at all lmao. Like I get it, i know why it happens, i understand racial microaggressions, i know how fandom spaces treat Black women, I UNDERSTAND BUT I CAN STILL BE UPSET. I have the right to be upset about it!!! 💀💀 And I know fem lesbians get ignored all the time, invalidated all the time, but it just sucks to see it happen to my character. I just feel like her being lesbian doesn't clock a lot of people, and I get asked to do more thirst trap art of Mor and I do want to but i'm also trying to be careful about like. Idk reducing a dark skinned fem lesbian to being validated only thru being sexy? LMAO.... Mor should be able to be attractive and lovable without tons and tons of thirst trap art (and it's not like I don't do it at all!! I'm not trying to be overprotective or deny her sexiness but I guess it's considered not enough?? give me a break)
And mannnn I was so mad actually that several comments voiced thoughts that essentially said Mor didn't "help" or "take care" of Dom enough, and that when Dom was finally opening up to her it was "Morgan finally doing something" LIKE HELLO??? HELLO??? It's DOM'S flaw that she can't open up? And Morgan does a lot??? I know immature ppl do not appreciate more soft and domestic/feminine forms of care bc they're used to taking their mothers for granted lmao but wooow I was taken aback. First of all, like, I try to show that Mor is the main cook, works just as much as Dom (let's go double income household), is always checking in on Dom's comfort as she navigates being queer, and is overall a very considerate girlfriend. AND SECOND OF ALL LMAO like even if she didn't do all that she doesn't need to have relationship currency to have a doting girlfriend, like the fucking trope of black women needing to suffer for love is so terrible I'VE HAD ENOUGH AND i"M NOT EVEN BLACK. Like there is NOTHING WRONG with their typical dynamic and I'm sick of people acting like there is. SOMEONE SAID DOM WAS LIKE A COMFORT PILLOW W NO AGENCY AND i"M LIKE WTFDYM???? She has TONS of agency and her sense of agency says she wants to LOVE AND DOTE ON HER PARTNER LIKE LMAO. WHAT?? Why is that hard to understand??? Is it because I made one (1) joke bout Mor being a pillow princess and the anti-princess squad are grinding their teeth in the bushes seething over it? Ppl are so twisted sometimes oh my goddddd. Like as an ace who was very confused navigating the lesbian dating scene as a teen and young adult I WISH i had met a pillow princess. Sometimes ppl don't realize that stone dynamics are very safe for aces!! Dom literally says she prefers it!! It's not Mor being selfish like lord please GOD ALLAH I'M TIRED I'M SO TIRED
and like on the topic of Domi overall she is more "popular" but sometimes I feel like people don't even really take the time to appreciate the significance about her either. She's not just a funny thirst trap 😭 and I feel like ppl dont acknowledge that she's asian half the time. I have so many white aces who only zone in on that aspect of her and it's like YEAH I GET IT, I'm ace and we don't have a lot of nuanced rep but she's also got more layers than that too. Tons of people related to her in the chapters where she talks about her childhood abuse yet very few people really, like, talked about the type of generational trauma that is very deeply embedded in her different cultures, no one saw that and oooof idk idk it felt inivisible. It's sometimes harder to talk about the racist microaggressions that Domi experiences thru my readers bc ppl will argue "well most webtoon leads are asian" but not many of them are asian in a way that like. talk about it. I'm born in the US so my experiences with being othered as an asian is just gonna be different and it's gonna affect my art and writing but it feels so unappreciated. I've had some queer asians relate to her but i can count them on my hand 💀 (I actually think it's two LMAO i"M SO SAD)
And going back to Dom and the comfort pillow w no agency comment lmao. This is another thing that rubs me the wrong way is once again, people are ignorant to the ways asians get pigeon-holed to media roles that have us being depicted as incapable. Maybe I want Dom to be more of a protector archetype bc I'm tired of meek Asian women in media? 🤔 Maybe I want Dom to be a prince-like character because asians get emasculated a lot?? 🤔🤔 Maybe I want Domi to maintain her prince persona instead of being "'physically' androgynous/masculine but really soft and girly on the inside uwuwu please treat me like a 'real' girl" because even in east asian media we won't allow women to exhibit strength and dependability??? 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 Like why is a tough girl empowering but once we have a gentle and doting personality in a romance it's considered cliche and the flaw of her partner for being "too weak." MAYBE THEIR PRINCE/PRINCESS DYNAMIC COMPLIMENT EACH OTHER??? HAVE YOU CONSIDERED? I WROTE THEM THAT WAY FOR A REASON??
Good lord this turned into an essay but I have so many things on my mind always
if you read this all. Thanks. I mainly needed to scream into a towel and put this down somewhere bc I complain about these issues to my discord and they understand/validate me all the time, but I wanna give them a break 😭 I also lowkey wanna document my various feelings as I work through Dom & Mor so I can remember and also grow from it
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bingoboingobongo · 1 year
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hi there! i love your work! i have a request for a cod fic💕💕
so i actually just learned there is ONE(1) all-female spec ops team in the world, and it's norway's jegertroppen("hunter troop"), so maybe how the 141(plus alejandro, rudy and könig) would react to meeting the leader of (or being in a relationship with) jegertroppen who is a no-nonsense, absolute bamf who can, in no uncertain terms, take care of herself
again, love your work and thank you for reading my random 2 am thoughts💕💕💕
task force 141 + bamf!reader
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Characters: Simon "Ghost" Riley, John "Soap" MacTavish, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, John Price, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra, König, Valeria Garza
Warnings: explicit language, reader is referred to as a woman/girl
A/N: yes i realize like half of these ppl aren't part of tf141 hush. also this is why i love u guys bc i would've never learned about this w/o u anon. also srry these are short we have a lot of characters and not a lot of time
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simon "ghost" riley:
alright so when ghost first met you he's pretty impressed ngl
like he knows how hard it is to be in special ops and he can only imagine how hard it is when you're a girl
like task force 141 is all men and most, if not all, of the people he works with on a daily basis are men
so yeah he has a lot of respect for you for making it to your position
he also has a lot of respect for your entire crew and he honestly really supports the idea of an all female special ops group
off topic but in the comics we see simon go through an attempted brainwashing (really pared down explanation sorry) where roba essentially tries to make him like a misogynist/rapist which obviously simon is disgusted by so yes simon is canonically a feminist
he's also in love with your strict no-nonsense style of work because it aligns really well with his
together you're pretty much unstoppable
literally the definition of a power couple
john "soap" mactavish:
alright so soap is honestly wowed the first time he meets you (and a little lovestruck too)
what can i say women in charge do things to him
he's definitely sorta intimidated by you at first though
idk it's like imagine ghostsoap but ghost is you
like he's always trying to fool around with you which maybe you tend to shut down
but honestly he doesn't mind and sometimes he'll keep going just to get a rise out of you/hear you talk
idk man he honestly just has so much respect for you
like if he could he would stop in the middle of an active warzone just to watch you work
also if you guys are dating he takes every chance possible to brag about you to anyone who'll listen
he just thinks you deserve a lot more recognition than you get
kyle "gaz" garrick:
alright so the first time gaz meets you he's honestly a little shocked
it sucks but women are a pretty rare sight to see especially in his level/field of work so an all female special ops team is like finding a needle in a haystack
that being said he has nothing but respect for you and what you do
he knows how bigoted people in the military can be and so he's glad to see that you've found a space for yourself where you're relatively unbothered by it
also it makes him happy to see more gender representation because it reminds him of his younger siblings and it makes him happy that they can have someone to look up to
like soap he also really likes watching you work
and when he's not fighting or falling out of helicopters he likes to just spend his time with you or watching you train or do menial tasks
maybe he's just too in love with you but you can make doing the dishes seem badass
john price:
alright so like pretty much everyone else here when price first met you the only thing in his mind was respect
he's read up on you and he knows a lot about your work and honestly he just really admires you
he's a leader and so he knows how tough it can be to have that job
plus to do that while being a woman in a male dominated space
yeah that earns you major points in his book
honestly he's hesitant to make a move because he doesn't want to feel like he's disrespecting you by initiating something romantic
but like you're literally such a badass motherfucker he really can't help but catch feelings
plus you're literally stunning so that's not helping the growing crush he has either
he loves to work alongside you whenever he can because you're literally inspiring on the field
plus he knows he doesn't have to worry about you or your forces which takes a lot of stress off his shoulders
alejandro vargas:
okie so like price alejandro really really respects you
again he's also a leader and he knows how taxing that can be which is why he respects you so much for it
i mean alejandro has a history with bamf women (valeria) so it's no surprise he falls for you too
idk man seeing a woman who can take care of herself just gets alejandro going
honestly you kind of remind alejandro of valeria but like in a good way
like not a "he can't get over his ex" kind of way but like a "damn he definitely has a type and his type is hot, badass women who really don't need a man but hopefully will date him despite it" kind of way
he'll also make sure that all of his forces treat you and your troops with the respect you deserve because he's not about to let you guys deal with that on his watch
that being said whenever someone is being a hassle he knows you can handle it yourself
rodolfo "rudy" parra:
alright so when rudy first meets you it's sorta like a mix between awe and also nervousness
like on one hand he's like "omg this woman is literally like the definition of badass motherfucker"
and on the other hand he's like "omg this woman is so pretty i hope she picks me omg can she tell im nervous gahdhshs"
you make his heart flutter what can i say
he's definitely a lot more shy asking you out than he might be with someone else
but that's because he really respects you and he doesn't want to come off as rude or disrespectful if he's too assertive
that being said when you do let him know you reciprocate his feelings he is over the fucking moon
he just can't believe that someone as independent and no-nonsense as you would choose to be in a relationship with him
like soap he will always find an opportunity to brag about you
and honestly he'll compliment you like there's no tomorrow
idk man he's just crazy about you like he respects you so much and so it's mind-blowing to him that you actually picked him
könig:
okay quick disclaimer but i've never written for könig so umm yeah
anyways könig is definitely really really impressed when he first meets you
you definitely make him nervous just because you're really good looking but he'll still talk/engage with you
even though it can be pretty nerve-wracking for him because of his social anxiety he'll suck it up because ultimately the anxiety of wrongly being perceived as a misogynist/sexist who won't talk to women is worse
but he's definitely a lot shyer and less inclined to talk to you outside of work
even though he really wants to
that being said if he's given enough time he will open up eventually
and even though you're no-nonsense you're more than happy to take things slow with him to make him feel comfortable
which honestly just makes him fall in love with you more
i mean i feel like this is obvious but you're definitely the "he asked for no pickles" couple
with you being the one saying it ofc and him being the one asking for no pickles
valeria garza:
ughh valeria is sooo hyped to see you oml
um don't ask how it works out with her being el sin nombre and you technically being in the military
love finds a way okay
anyways as a woman in a male dominated space herself it is so refreshing to not only see you, but to see your whole troop
honestly valeria definitely wishes she could have been a part of it
and tbh if she wasn't el sin nombre i could definitely see her considering joining
like in a way it kind of makes her sad because she knows how different her life would be if she had a group like this in mexico
also im just know realizing the connection to artemis' huntresses (is that what it's called?)
anyways valeria is not shy about flirting with you
like you tick all of her boxes
you're hot, you're a natural leader, you're more than capable of taking care of yourself
win win win
and if you let her she will treat you like a god damn queen
and also she absolutely loves seeing you work if she could she would just perch on some treetop with a pair of binoculars and watch you while you work
i realize that sounds creepy but um it's not
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ftmtftm · 5 months
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something i wanted to ask, genuinely, is if you think the labels transmisogyny/misandry and the way theyre used can really be helpful
i personally think they can be but with how so many ppl try to frame it as "exclusive" forms of oppression just doesnt help at all. yes, transmisogyny does mainly happen to trans women/fems, but a lot of ppl refuse to believe it could also happen to trans men/mascs. and i believe it can go the same way with transmisandry as ive seen multiple ppl describe wut it is and see how it could be applied to trans women/fems. and that doesnt even acknowledge intersex ppl, whether theyre trans or not. i feel like labeling it in specific ways to say "this is an intersection of oppression" without going "this is an exclusive experience" is beneficial to all sides, but ppl try to gatekeep with labels like "tma" and "tme" and so on. its like saying a gay guy cant call themself a dyke bc "youre not a lesbian and therefore u cant reclaim that slur" even if theyve been called a dyke before. it really just feels like the labels of transmisogyny and transmisandry is used as a way to fuel the fires of oppression olympics by saying that "if ur a trans man u experience less oppression than a trans woman." and it seems to be mainly fueled by the idea of "woman (oppressed) + trans (oppressed) = really oppressed" whereas "man (not oppressed) + trans (oppressed) = not as oppressed" when its nothing like that.
its also incredibly hard to find Any information about transmisandry. i always see "trans men just have it/pass easier" and even other transphobic statements of how going on T makes trans men more aggressive and assertive. i feel like tumblr has been the only place ive seen any genuine discussion about transmisandry and even then its not great or very informative.
i believe that both transmisandry and transmisogyny should be acknowledged as real forms of oppression rather than being used as a way to oppress ppl further.
i dont wish to cause an argument as these r just my thoughts and i genuinely want to hear yours on it too
So the TL;DR my opinion sort of boils down to "Yes, I think they can be incredibly useful terms when used with intention and clarity of purpose" but there's a lot of nuance to that opinion. Basically though - I mostly agree with you on a conceptual level anon. I just wanted to write an essay.
(and also I don't fully address some things in this ask because frankly I'm burnt out and don't want to talk about them at the moment and I made this blog to talk about my special interests anyway. Sue me ‪¯\_(ツ)_/¯‬)
Something I've been noticing in my reading of Intersectional/trans-inclusive Feminist literature, combined with my engagement with trans activism, over the last few years is: We're all very, very afraid of talking about sexism right now and it absolutely makes sense why.
It makes sense because the conversation has been ground to dirt by TERFs constantly yelling about "sex-based oppression" as a means to be transmisogynist and degrade the womanhood of trans women. However the response to this has been deeply flawed in my opinion.
Instead of actually addressing sexism as it's own distinct form of oppression under an Intersectional lense, we've simply made a hard left into only discussing gender informed oppression and only legitimizing gender informed oppression in the form of misogyny. It's a very uninformed response in my opinion actually - but that also makes sense because it's currently very hard to be informed on general feminist theory and politics at the moment because Radical Feminism is a fucking plague.
In reality though, sexism and misogyny are two different forms of oppression that often overlap because gender and sex are different classes of identity that often overlap.
This degradation of language - both from TERFs conflating sex and gender and from Intersectionals/progressives separating the two so hard they don't even acknowledge sex - is what I think is part of the cause of this problem that is leaving trans men / trans mascs with a massive hole in our ability to discuss our experiences. And not just trans men either!!! It's also nonbinary and intersex people as well who are harmed by this void.
So that begs the question: How do we actually talk about sexism in an Intersectional Feminist, trans inclusive, capacity that combats Radical Feminist rhetoric on sexism?
And the answer? Is carefully, consciously, and in a manner that is aware of several different experiences within the nebulous concept of female identity.
I will actually be using the word "female" as a term a decent amount throughout this post. For the sake of this discussion I am defining "female" as anyone anyone who presently identifies as female due to their assigned sex as well as anyone who is socially treated/viewed as female due to their gender, legal, and/or medical statuses. In this post "female" is an umbrella term that includes cis women, trans men, trans women, nonbinary people, and intersex people who feel that definition applies to them in relation to their sex.
Because the fact of the matter is that Patriarchy and our society at large hate women and they hate people who are assigned female and they hate people who are female and those are distinct categories of people with a lot of overlap and a lot of differences.
Female identity is like venn diagram of sex informed experiences that cis women, trans women, trans men, nonbinary people, and intersex people all have a place in for various different reasons. It's a diverse category of experiences and this should be a touchstone for solidarity, not division in my opinion. The experiences and needs of one group don't inherently negate the experiences and needs of another similar group, even if they conflict, you know?
It's a concept I've actually adopted from disability activists, who often talk about the ways in which disability activism often has to address conflicting needs because sometimes some disabled people's needs are in direct conflict with each other!! Conflicting needs are not something unique to disability activism though.
Most groups and classes people have conflicting needs within themselves and I think there's a lot to be learned in gendered activism from disability activists in this regard. I think often in activist discussions a lot of people stop when situations stop impacting them directly instead of trying to find commonality and empathy with similar experiences. It's easy to have knee jerk reactions, it's harder to pause and contemplate.
So, let's actually contemplate transmisogyny and transandrophobia/transmisandry as terms for a moment.
Transmisogyny was coined as a term by Julia Serano in 2007 in her book The Whipping Girl and I do think it's incredibly useful for describing the ways in which transphobia (the broader oppression of trans individuals) intersects with misogyny (the broader oppression of women) in specific ways wrapped up into a specific term.
I've engaged in a lot of criticism of The Whipping Girl because, well, I think for just about every excellent idea Serano posits about the trans feminine experience she undercuts it with White Feminist rhetoric and simple "cis men and women are opposites therefore trans men and women are opposites" type rhetoric that harms her arguments more than helps them. HOWEVER! Serano herself even articulates that misogyny and transphobia may intersect in ways that impact nonbinary and trans masculine individuals differently from trans feminine individuals, and that additional language may be required to fill that gap in The Whipping Girl!!
So now there's a bit of a linguistically philosophical discussion to be had here on the function of language and what language we can actually use to fill the hole trans men experience with our language - which is also where we dive back into talking about concepts like conflicting needs and sexism.
When creating terminology (or jargon), one must take into account several things like clarity and context, which is why personally - I do not like the term "transmisandry" at all. I use it as a tag because I know some people prefer it as a term and I'd like my posts to reach that audience as well. Generally speaking though - I think any inclusion of "misandry" as a term will always be a nonstarter in most discussions on gender. It's much too loaded of a word because of it's association with the misogynistic actions of MRAs among several other semantic reasons.
An argument could, I think, be made for a term like "transsexism" which would describe the intersection of transphobia (the broader oppression of trans individuals) and sexism (the broader oppression of female individuals) but I think that is still too broad if we want to talk about trans masculine experiences specifically. (Though I do still think it may have contextual use as a term quite frankly - that's just beyond the scope of this post).
So? Then we come to transandrophobia and a conversation on misogynistic, sexist responses to masculinity in people society forcibly identified as "female women" under patriarchy.
I want to state that off the bat that I take a lot of issue with the way people dismiss trans men's experiences as just "general transphobia" or "default transphobia" because... Why are you automatically treating a man's experiences as the universal default? Especially when there are things based on the intersection of his manhood and marginalization that he experiences that women of the same marginalization don't?
I have this issue with most other conversations about the intersection of marginalized identity and manhood honestly. It actually really reeks of unconscious misogynist bias to me. But I digress, that's not the subject of this post.
I think a lot about Brandon Teena and the motivations for his murder. I think a lot about Lou Sullivan's diary entries about his loneliness and isolation with regard to being around trans women and lesbians - as well as his history fighting for his right to medical transition. I think about P. Carl's musings about the ways in which his entire community abandoned him once he came out as a trans man as opposed to a lesbian woman. I think about Irreversible Damage by Abigal Shrier and the way she manipulated - if I'm remembering correctly - YouTuber, Chase Ross into misleading interviews that skewed his words and stories to attempt to "prove" her points about how "our girls" are being manipulated into transgenderism via social contagion spread through platforms like YouTube.
I think about the ways in which trans mascs - particularly those on HRT - actively avoid medical care because of the deeply gendered nature of gynecological care and also because we are treated like medical freaks and abominations when we do try to seek that care. I think about the ways our bodies are inherently, deeply impacted by the overturning of Roe V. Wade and how our decisions to not carry children via abortion or hysterectomy - or our desire to carry children - are met with the phenomenon of medical misogyny like any other woman or female individual but in a way that also explicitly intersects with our transness.
I think about the ways in which Patriarchal society sees my "female" body in direct opposition to my identity as a "man" and how that is something that needs to be "corrected" back into "female womanhood" via rape and assault. I think about my own corrective assault a lot. I think about how the 2015 National Trans Survey actually found higher self reported instances with sexual assault in trans men than in trans women. I think about how I personally see that as a touchstone of solidarity with my lesbian siblings and especially with my other butch siblings who also have their expressions of masculinity treated as deviancy that deserves corrective action.
I apologize for diverting into less of an academic musing into prose and also for diverging from the subject of this ask directly into a much larger essay - but I am simply so tired of trying to say that I and other trans masculine people are people worthy of having our own language for our own experiences instead of just being dismissed as a privileged class - quite literally on the basis of our own oppression.
Especially when people use the words of someone like Julia Serano to say we don't deserve that language when she herself posited that maybe we should have it. Especially when Kimberlé Crenshaw - the woman who created the theory of Intersectionality that Serano is attempting to engage with in The Whipping Girl - has stated that one of the goals of Intersectionality is to create language for and give voice to marginalized identities that otherwise are not given language and voice.
So - What do you call it when trans masculine people are explicitly targeted on the basis of their trans masculinity? What do you call that intersection of sexism, misogyny, and transphobia that misgenders and attacks trans masculinity explicitly? Because that isn't "general transphobia" - that is transphobia motivated by a Patriarchal desire for control over the broader "female identity" that society is seeing as "too masculine".
It's trans-andro-phobia. Transphobia targeted at a particular group of trans individuals on the basis of their masculinity in a way that intersects with a sexist, misogynist, Patriarchal desire to control perceived/forced female identity and the subsequent interpersonal and social ramifications that come alongside that systemic abuse.
Focus, intention, and clarity of purpose.
---
I do want to add that there is absolutely something to be said about the fact that these conversations are all extremely White at the moment.
Radical Feminism is a deeply White (and White Supremacist) movement. Conversations on Trans Feminist theory in general are still deeply White as well. Julia Serano is very much a White Trans Feminist, and as such most responses to her work by other White trans people tend to be, well, very White.
I myself am even contributing to the prevalence of Whiteness in the conversation because even though I am Ashkenazi I am also still White. I might be informed by and am actively using concepts formed by Black Women and Ethnic Minority Women as the basis of my own theories, but that doesn't erase the context of my own race in this conversation either.
I really do not want that to be lost upon people, especially other White people. A racialized context matters in this conversation because Race and Gender really cannot be fully separated from each other in conversations about power and systemic oppression.
Bonus TL;DR - Read The Will to Change and Feminism is for Everybody by bell hooks. Read Audre Lorde. Read Kimberlé Crenshaw. Read Leslie Feinberg and Judith Butler. Read María Lugones. Learn the concepts they are presenting and then also learn how to apply those concepts in a consciousness and self aware manner.
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lionmythflower · 1 month
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evan rosier headcanons under the cut
Twins w pandora
He has a chinchilla (its name is dusty, barty helped name it)
He's rlly good friends w remus
In a book club w lily, remus,dorcas and regulus
He's Canadian
So he kinda had a very slight American accent
Sleeps and listens to music on long car rides
Knows Canadian French
Asexual
either gay or bi
Poc
has a tattoo of "bcjr" on his neck or shoulder (barty has a matching one of "Rosie")
Would love MARINA and Florence + the Machines
Was probably more of an ABBA fan then a queen fan
lily got him into music like ABBA and Remus got him into music like David Bowie
Would also love Arctic Monkey
Would love makeup
Has those star eyeliner stamps and he absolutely rocks them
Bigender (stole this hc from someone can't remember who at that moment)
probally goes by he/they pronouns
Pandora and Evan steal each other's clothes sm that they don't know who's is who's at this point
So ppl are like " wasn't pandora wearing that the other day?" and evan will be like "idk maybe?" And vise versa
Would love Greek mythology
Has heterochromia and his eyes are blue and green so he's is looking at u like 🔵_🟢 (O_O) (pandora also has eyes like that)
"you have heterophobia in ur eyes" "...you mean heterochromia?" "no" (barty and evan)
i feel like he would be able to play like 3 instruments and would love love love music sm
Has so. Many. Ear. Piercings.
Lace and fishnet gloves
RINGS
Evan, pandora, Dorcas, regulus, and Barty all wear rings and they all js like share rings
Would love fairy tale retellings
100% read song of Achilles and sobbed
His parents are like really that mean js very strict and they don't really give him enough privacy and it's suffocating
Has sensory overloads sometimes and he will just cling to Barty or Pandora bc they both make him feel safe when it's too much
Also has panic attacks
Says things like "I wanna kms" and ppl think he's joking but he's really not
Baggy clothes
layers his clothes a lot
had like three sweatshirts/sweaters that he LOVES
eating disorder (idk which one but he definitely has one)
Constantly has a headache
Is actually rlly su!sidal but he's only told like 2 ppl (probably Pandora and reg or barty)
Either never gets sick or gets sick every month (depends on the year)
Doesn't like talking abt his problems
Will not ask for help unless he has basically given up
Is rlly smart
He's like everything smart but doesn't really care abt math or science
That one kid who's reading and not paying attention the entire class and then gets an A on every test
He's parents don't really care about grades but he does and he gets really stressed abt grades
Would 100% be that person that you wouldn't think would be a feminist and then someone makes a rude comment abt women and he would go off on them
Very pretty
Always cold. Always
Would have loved all the movies that Millie Bobby Brown is in (Enola Holmes, and Damsel mainly)
Would love ppl doing his nails (even though he's good at doing it himself)
doc martins
Would have converse and would draw on them
Has so many books (both barty and evan rant to each other abt the books they read)
Would have adhd but more of the not able to focus side
He's nail polish is almost always chipped bc they pick at it w/o even realizing he's doing it
would have so many bracelets
Hates silence but hates loud noise even more
Had earbuds in 24/7
"Look at the moon! :0" no matter what phase the moon is in (does the same thing w the sky)
Would get sooo happy when ever he was in a place where u can clearly see the stars at night bc "omg look, you can see the stars! Their so pretty!!!"
They're so energetic but also so laid back
Pretty much all or nothing for everything (emotions, activities, relationship etc.)
Really good at drawing
normally types in all lowercase so he doesn't come off as intimating
Evan and pandora probably made fun of the pure blood stereotypes so much
(I've made by point abt this hc a lot but I'mma say it again) : Evan and regulus arguing over the pronouncing of different French words bc Evan is Canadian French and Regulus is European French lol
He's an introvert you can't tell me otherwise
Was almost put into ravenclaw bc he was arguing w the sorting hat and it was like "ok valid points, ur probably a ravenclaw" and then Evan told the hat to go fuck itself and it put him in Slytherin 💀
Definition of a keyboard smash idk how to explain it
Would have loved Pinterest
wow this is really long. I'mma make one of these for Peter later :)
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chlorinecake · 4 months
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I just saw what that anon said and I can really really relate I feel like there's no way I can like them cuz I'm black I feel like. Weird for having a crush on Ni-ki cuz I'm black and even though I know there's no chance anyway cause he probably doesn't date fans obviously lol It makes me ashamed especially because people are always saying "what if / he probably doesn't like black girls/people" and it makes me feel like I'm less beautiful because I'm black and even if he did date fans I mean I'm like SOOOO ugly like atrocious but it makes me feel like even if I was a little bit more pretty he wouldn't like me or would dismiss me cause I'm black or like I wouldn't be good enough or he'd be disgusted or disappointed or weirded out because I'm black and a fan /has a crush on him and besides him it makes me feel like enhypen wouldn't talk to me or treat me the same cuz I'm not Asian or white like I couldn't be a fan or wouldn't be as important or pretty or cool or even just they wouldnt want me as a fan or like me or even look my way cause im black its gotten so bad that people dont evn have to say that anymore (they do but they dont have too) for me to think that way. Like I know we all saw that pretty engene video with that girl with the glasses and i couldn't help but make it about race like thinking would they look at me like that or would I be ugly abd weird cause I'm black ? Or if she was black would they still think she's pretty? Or would they even put the camera on her if she was black ? Anyway I'm rambling but being black is something I struggle with even without people saying the group I like or the guy I have a crush on (Niki obviously) wouldn't like me or would hate me for being black . Or they would be uncomfortable or disgusted with me because I'm black so it's just hard to even see myself meeting them or *even to imagine myself in reader fanfics even if the reader's supposed to be black because I've convinced myself that the only way I'd be pretty or attractive or they'd be friends withe or date me in Ni-kis case is if I was white or Asian* (*just talking about from a fanfic standpoint for this one* but yeah) but yeah it sucks and
Okay, I REFUSE to sit here and let you talk down on yourself like that. I don’t care how true you may think it is, YOU ARE NOT UGLY, Mirah ~ You’re beautiful, from head to toe, melanated skin, curly hair and all. Black women are beautiful, it’s disgusting to me how society has brought some of us to a point where we feel insecure, undesirable, or unworthy of affection from others. My words might not do much to encourage you, because finding confidence (esp as a black girl) takes time. But I really urge you to understand that you can’t expect other ppl to accept you when you don’t even accept yourself. Wish I could give you the BIGGEST hug rn, bc this actually hurts to read :(
Another point, I’ve seen plenty videos of Enhypen (along with other kpop groups) connecting with colored fans in the same way they do with their supporters of a fairer complexion, but I won’t share any of those videos here bc I don’t want you to seek “proof” as a way for you to feel better abt yourself.
On the flip side, let’s say that some ppl in the kpop industry DO have a prejudice (which I’m sure some do): your life and happiness isn’t dependent on their validation.
Let’s not even get started on how a lot of Ni-Ki’s favorite artists are black (Riki Jackson ? Bro would’ve never called himself that if he was racist)… but anyway, colored people like any other group of individuals can b really amazing once they get past their insecurities and embrace the way God made them. Jst know that u can always come to be if your struggling with something or just want to vent <3
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yohanpalia · 8 months
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fatness in palia
(its gonna sound like i hate palia bc ppl dont understand the concept of nuance, so just to be clear - i decently like the game so far. things can be both good and bad, and some ppl, like me, enjoy analysing and criticising things without hating on the things.)
it rly bugs me that the only properly fat character so far in Palia is someone whos obsessing about his sandwiches and talking about how he always makes sure to eat properly, and *also*, is someone in a position of power who does bad things (the quest where we grew crops for him is the most clear example ive seen so far). basically - the biggest fat man is a bad person who is obsessed with food.
delaila is big, but also falls into a stereotype - shes a countryside mom (often fat in media), and parent characters are generally easier for mainstream fatphobic media to design as fat bc theyre not intended to be attractive in the same way the younger characters are (or older men, see hodari and ashura). i also want to point out that she reads as having a little more of a curvy body type compared to kenli whos more of a big ball, and that none of the female characters read as having the same type of facial fat or double chin that kenli has (which is indeed why im calling him the only properly fat character). its almost as if that kind of facial/chin fat is considered worse on women than on men or something :)) wink wink.
ashura and sifuu are big, but read as "strong and muscular", not "a fat person". which any fat person will know is a significant difference in how you're perceived. (there is also an aspect here ofc of that irl, masculine-presenting "bulky and strong" ppl are often more positively perceived than feminine "bulky and strong" ppl, and that masculinity being seen as desirable in itself affects why "bulky and strong" is seen as desirable where "just fat" isnt, but this is a sidetrack rn.)
elouisa and caleri are... chubby, i guess? i was happy the first time i met caleri bc she had a visible double chin. but, after a bit of playing, seeing that there werent any fatter characters than this who were supposed to be seen as attractive or even good nice people, that enjoyment weighs little. i also again want to point out that both elouisa and caleri have very "smooth" faces, and mostly "conventionally attractive" features, essentially. they are chubby/curvy, but not in ways that would be considered *too* far off from the fatphobic, ageist, sexist beauty standards of society. they also have basically hourglass bodies.
the characters that we are mainly "supposed" to find attractive in this game - the romanceable ones - range from very skinny to "fit". there is even a romanceable skinny robot, notably not a romanceable fat robot (hekla is round, reads as the fat mom stereotype, and is not romanceable - einar is tall and slender and kinda built like a dorito, and, oh, presents more masculine... even robots arent free from misogynist and fatphobic design). there is also a non-romanceable character that apparently both characters in the game and many players find hot, which is a non-fat man, hodari. i note this bc he's presented as an attractive character, and is not fat.
its nice to see an older(?) female character presented as attractive - tamala, however she is very skinny and with an hourglass type build. this is still... nice, i guess, but in the context of the lack of "attractive characters" that arent really skinny, or muscular, or hourglass shaped.....
another related issue is that a very skinny character, jel.... literally says things like "i havent eaten for 3 days". wow! thats lovely! especially together with kenli obsessing over food! and together with an average size character, jina, also mentioning she forgets to eat. that made me feel gross to read, and i dont think its a good choice to put "lol forgetting to eat, relatable content" in the dialogue of characters who are very skinny. this can be a bad reinforcement of society's abuse ("just starve yourself and you'll be skinny and beautiful!") for people with eating disorders and for ppl who struggle with their weight and with their relation to food in general. but *especially* when the biggest character is, in contrast, talking about how hes obsessing over his sandwiches and whatever (and again - is a bad person and also not supposed to be attractive, while jel and jina are supposed to be attractive and romanceable). this is also obviously a reinforcement of prejudice against fat ppl - that fat ppl eat too much, cant control their eating, are always thinking about food, etc etc, while skinny ppl ~forgot to eat lol~.
all in all, if anyone reads this, i just hope ppl can acknowledge and be aware to the fatphobia that has gone into the design of this game, *just like basically every other game*. im not saying palia is worse than other games, bc frankly, most games are like this, and its gross and weird and i hate that. but its still valid to discuss that problem in the context of one game, without implying that its an issue that only affects that game.
i hope that at the very least, they will eventually add in more body types to the character creator that also represent bigger people, and that potentially, we might see some attractive fat characters as npcs in the future. and no, their faces dont need to be slimmed down compared to their bodies to be attractive! they can have unsmooth faces and double chins and wrinkles and still be attractive! and they can have all that and not be men, and be attractive! and they dont need to have hourglass bodies nor to be muscular and strong to be attractive, either!
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autogyne-redacted · 5 months
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tbh, your recent post about transandrophobia synthesizes my thoughts about it very well, and im surprised you're getting backlash. the only additions i would make is that the gender/sex binary in the west was originally very explicitly a white supremacist creation, even down to the categories of male/female, and lionizing any aspect of that tends to get really racist really fast no matter how feminist or well intentioned. i guess you'd call me a trandandrobro bc i hang out in the tag and sometimes use the word for specific things (like when the lab threw out my cervical cancer test cells bc the cup was labelled M) but, i genuinely don't disagree with a single one of your points. i've been getting uncomfortable with the increasingly reactionary nature of the conversation on transandrophobia and i appreciate your take a lot.
Rambling about transandrophobia
Tbh It's been really surprising to see transandrophobia types interacting with that post all around.
And mostly it boils down to me having had windows into transandrophobia discourse that makes it seem bad*. And other ppl treating these aspects as exceptions to a discourse they see as basically good.
And I recognize that in part this is just how polarized internet discourses work. Like, if my windows into transandrophobia are largely when something egregious gets said and passed around in my circles, that's gonna give a way different impression then if ppl are part of the discourse and curating a slice they agree with.
And the consistent overall harassment of any attempt to talk about transmisogyny and constant bad faith engagements (eg attacks on agab and cagab language, cafab attempts to ID as trans women and as direct targets of transmisogyny) mean few of us are still in a position to assume good faith with internet strangers we run into who identify with a discourse that very much seems to have a massive transmisogyny problem.
.
My slightly more extended position on transandrophobia, since I've been thinking about it the past few days is:
1) I'm broadly supportive of ppl talking about their experiences and trying to find common ground even around shared ~privilege~, so long as it's done with a commitment to broader, collective liberation. (Eg cis men getting together from a feminist perspective to talk about patriarchy = good, cis men doing so with no specific opposition to normative masculinity = fashy).
2) the general attitude I've seen from transandrophobia world is to say: this has nothing to do with anyone other than trans mascs ppl other than trans mascs aren't welcome as part of this discourse: it's by us for us. Intentionally creating an insulated discourse especially around a point of (partial) privilege has a terrible track record. But regardless of relative positionality insulated discourses are just going to be more limited. They can create theory that's empowering for the creator group but it's probably not gonna get much mileage beyond and it's easy for it to be actively harmful.
3) I've thought for ages that trans masc experience seems ~under theorized~ and that transphobia is rly under theorized too. And it'd be really cool to see this addressed in a way that isn't rife with transmisogyny. It does seem like transandrophobia discourse is addressing a real hole, it's just doing in a way that rly sketches me out.
4) really I think gender discourse overall is just not in a great place rn. It was 1990 when Judith Butler questioned whether it makes sense for women to be the sole/primary subject of feminism, and we had major interventions that I'd say reached a peak in the early to mid 2010's (criticisms of white feminism, of cis feminism, intersectionality becoming a dominant framework).
There's a strong tendency to say that we're basically in a post gender world, or that race is just a more fundamental framework (which I strongly disagree with)** and I do think we really need a rebuilt gender theory that has teeth to it. Trying to build theory around transmisogyny I've found it necessary to do a lot of general theory building around gender. How normative masculinity and femininity work, how gender is policed. I don't think we're gonna be able to make a clean break from identity politics until we can have a strong theory framework that lets us talk about this shit from outside identity politics.
5) this is v rambly but I'm inclined to engage with transandrophobia discourse a little more than lots of my circles in part because I really want there to be more good theory building going on around gender, from different positions and across positions. One day, maybe.
*full of transmisogyny/denials of transmisogyny, trans masc exceptionalism and a failure to recognize and be in solidarity around shared issues with trans fems and cis men.
**getting back to the part of your ask about the history of gender and white supremacy, there's a huge entanglement between gender and race, gender and civilization. Normative gender differentiation has been a classic way the civilized set themselves apart from those they deem savage.
Broad claims like the one you make in your ask anon get messy tho. Like, a largely binary model of gender is older than history but you can also talk about the modern binary having really only come about over the past couple centuries (and obviously it's heavily contested and changing rn). Similarly you could say the modern concept of whiteness came about through the trans Atlantic slave trade (and then has been constantly shifting and getting redefined ever since) but there's obviously much older histories it's building off of.
I'm realizing now that maybe you meant the binary divide between sex vs gender as opposed to the male vs female binary but I can't tell which. Either way, my position here is mostly that it's really really messy to make big historical claims. It's such a high level view you can tell a lot of different stories with the available historical evidence. Ideas about gender and race have a heavily entangled history tho and it's certainly gonna go poorly if you treat either as natural.
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driderwife · 2 months
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Ok so here’s extremely barebones info about my Tav cuz ppl are asking and I wanna ramble about dumb fan character stuff cuz it’s fun lol and I actually love this OC now, im probably gonna use him for regular DnD shit when im done with BG3. Sorry for being cringe but like. I’m free and im gonna play this game how I want.
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His name is Valence and he’s a half drow storm sorcerer (He should have a drow name but I like hate trying to make them work im not crazy about drow names). I’ve only figured out like, the very basics of his backstory but he was raised in the underdark instead of being banished or killed for his high elf blood, because there’s magic inherent in his bloodline on his drow fathers side so he was deemed useful. I don’t know his early life yet but obviously he was Bullied and Oppressed because duh he’s a little male drow half elf freak.
What I have written so far is that later in his life as an adult he studied and worked under an elderly Matriarch who like whipped and paddled and spanked him. So he’s particularly scared of old women and just submits to women in general. for a lot of his in game choices if a woman is showing authority toward him I just like have him do whatever she says LOL. Hes like I sat my Gray ass down and LISTENED.
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As for the romance stuff I have a soap opera going in my head where Valence is like completely enamored with Astarion bc Astarion took his virginity at the ripe age of Old Man & Valence is like easily manipulated by anyone talking him up bc his name is Mud in drow society and usually nobody likes him. also he’s a revenge driven half drow so he lets Astarion do the ascension plot & when that goes sour in their relationship shit Valence is like, do whatever you want to me be evil. Women beated me for fun im a wet napkin for you.
Also you shouldn’t feel bad for valence at all im playing him kinda evil and vindictive and letting him making nasty in game choices. Let the old traumatized twinks be toxic they need to fight it out.
But im also gonna romance Halsin as a poly thing i just haven’t thoroughly plotted that in my head bc i didn’t get very far in his arc yet it takes a WHILE.
Anyways im just having fun with making a truly pathetic dude. Also I love drow men theyre really the Kens of DND universe.
Anyways pls don’t be shy if u wanna tell me about your guys too I think it’s so fun.
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sneezemonster15 · 1 year
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A lot of adults women behave like incels but less violent and more manipulative. They usually love the cringe romance movies where the main girl is average looking and not like the other girls and manage to make the badboy soft. Generally they hate hot girls bc they are jealous (see the way Skr stans talk abt Ino and feel victorious bc they "won" against her, the hot girl). Those women are full of insecurities, thats why Skr is so relatable.
The way Skr tries to not think about the fact Sske dont wanna spend time with her is the same way some irl women ignore that their husbands are cheating, and if they cant ignore it they will attack the other women but they will NEVER leave the guy. All their self worth is based on having a bf/husband.
Then there are some lesbian/bi women who stan her as an act of feminism. She is a female character who got what she wanted so its a win apparently. Fortunatly those ppl are minority bc as a queer woman and feminist, it is very embarrassing to read those takes. I'm all for uplifting women and for them to get everything they desire but not at the expense of non sexist men. Plus, Skr dont even look so happy at the end of the day. So is it really a win for her and women?
Yeah that makes sense. But it's sad isn't it? Because even trying to have a dialogue with them isn't helpful. There's no point having it if they aren't ready to be receptive to it.
Sakura really sees no contradiction between what she says and what she does.
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And yet...
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Lol. Till only two days ago, she was found styling her hair in the middle of chuunin exams, all skinned knees and having suffered minor injuries, while her team mates were working. She let her hair grow in the first place because she thought Sasuke liked it. Lol.
What impression can it possibly give to the reader? Kishi had to stress on it too, with another character this time.
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Why would Kishi stress so much on Sakura and her obsession with her hair, just to make her say something totally hypocritical five chapters down? Lol. Kishi is very clever about writing his characters act according to the character traits given to them. Like for example, the panel below, Kakashi acts according to his character (where he has a blindspot for Sakura's negative shades) thinks Sakura is not the type to brag when she is actually exactly the type to brag.
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Lol, Sakura's whole personality is about being obsessive for Sasuke which in turn makes her violently jealous of Naruto and Ino. She beats Naruto up regularly for no apparent reason and harasses Ino, even though that girl did nothing but try to help her. And she brags, it's the only thing she does properly. Lol.
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And yet, she is always bragging, showing off. From start to end.
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And I am positive I am missing some panels here lol. She is always looking for external validation. She revels in it. While external validation itself is not a bad thing, since humans need some amount of external validation to measure their abilities, and Naruto does it too, but for him, it's rooted in his quest for acknowledgement and acceptance, so he could make friends and not be ostracized from community. Sakura does it because of her ego. While Naruto has his principles rooted in his belief systems, his emotions and his dream that egg him on to do better, Sakura finds her motivation in the desire to show off and impress people, mostly Sasuke.
She disrespects Ino, Tsunade, and she fights Kaguya while she says this?
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Girl, why are you so embarrassing? If you wanna attack her, just do it. Why even mention her being a woman? She wasn't mocking you, she barely even noticed you. You aren't worthy enough for her to notice.
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Lol. And things she says about being a woman are just so cringe lol.
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No one underestimates her because she is a girl, in fact Kakashi coddles her because she is a girl. She is underestimated because despite training, she is just weak and unskilled, as compared to her cohorts. And if she is skillful, we don't see it in the same proportion measured against the way she talks about herself. Tsunade never had to sing about her being a woman and yet people are bloody scared of her strength. Temari never had to mention it, neither did Kushina. Chiyo certainly briefly talks about how women always get the short end of the stick in their male driven society, but she not only belongs to a much older generation that has seen a hell lot, she is a master puppeteer and a superior warrior in her own right, she has earned it.
It would have been fine if only Sakura had actually consistently kept her word, proven herself through actions and not just empty words. Because when she doesn't, it reduces the value of those words. I don't know if she really meant it when she said women were fickle. Who? Tsunade? Kushina? Chiyo? Temari? Nope, they didn't give any such impression.
She constantly condescends to Naruto despite him having proved himself to be skillful, strong, the one who wins team seven several battles while she stands in a corner shaking and sweating. Thing is, she realises she makes mistakes. She acknowledges Naruto's strength as well, but she doesn't do anything to change. The whole point of a realization is to work on it and correct your behaviour. She is condescending towards Naruto till the end. Konohamaru takes her down a peg when she is being disparaging towards him and Naruto when they are doing the oiroke jutsu contest. She even hits Konohamaru, and he gets pissed off. So he makes a reverse oiroke jutsu just to show her true face, and that face has a streak of blood trickling down her nose lol. But when Naruto uses it against Kaguya, she again condescends to him. Narusakus are kinda embarrassing tbh, Sakura doesn't get Naruto. She thinks she does but she doesn't. She thinks she gets Sasuke but she obviously doesn't. And yet, she makes her 'strategies' in kage arc around her knowledge of Naruto and fake confesses to him. Naruto rejects her. Lol. She goes to Sasuke and tries to kill him (with a kunai...) by tricking him, only to be attacked, twice. Even when she drugs her cohorts before going to Sasuke, they clock her real plan. Lol.
She overestimates herself, even though it's clear that if she only thought things through, she would be much more successful. She is really blind to her own shortcomings even though she tries but remains unsuccessful, which is even sadder.
She does know Sasuke doesn't wanna spend time with her, she also gets a sense that she will always be much lesser than Naruto in Sasuke's eyes, she knows but she doesn't care. Even if it means long term misery for everyone involved.
Yes, I am sure some women find her character relatable. But relatable doesn't mean everything. I relate to Sasuke and I am very wary of establishing emotional connections but I know it's not something ideal or healthy. Connection is what people thrive on. If I ever started to relate with Sakura, I would really be compelled to take a hard look at myself. Lol.
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kouhaiofcolor · 14 days
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Dunno who needs to hear this (nah who am I kidding? I know exactly who I’m talking to & about, & y’all do too 😉),
but if your “Black friend(s)” are only Black males who are indifferent, entertained by or silent in the face of misogynoir, Black fetishism, colorism, antiblackness in general, & esp you using the n word as a non black — you do not have Black friends. I’m sorry. You’re simply friends with Black enablers who pander to & exceptionalize your ignorance bc they either hate themselves, their people or their culture (If not all of the above; & usually, it’s all if not most of the above). That’s what that is. At its core & in depth. The “Black People” you conveniently bring up to defend yourself when your humanity is brought into question or criticized online or irl, are just enabling your shitty behavior. And that is the purpose & function you comfortably reduce them to — whether either of you realize it or not.
They’re there for your convenience as apologists. I notice a lot of the time when y’all say or act on something antiblack, y’all reach vehemently for the minimal amount of Black “People” you actually know personally just to validate or excuse antiblack behavior, opinions or notions. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that these Black “friends” are always always totally fine w y’all mishandling them or things unique to our culture, either. It’s more birds of a desperate ass feather than anything else. Stop looking to these friends to protect, back and validate your prejudice, bc trust & believe actual Black People w self & cultural respect don’t & wouldn’t fw them anyhow. Y’all could be like, “BlAcK pEoPLe DoNt Go To CoLLeGe,” — and reference the all of 0.3 Black People you interact w on an even semi-regular basis as a representative for the entire diaspora just bc they coon ass agrees to save face in front of you. 😂 Be ffr.
Y’all are never acquainted w Black People who even have the balls to put you in your place “friend to friend” for the ways in which y’all make them look stupid. Please stop it. Also, not that it’s a secret at all, but Black men are pretty notorious for mistreating their own ppl the same way non blacks do so. 👀While it’s not all of them, they’re certainly not the most ideal group to testify for y’all, just saying. Them be y’all picks tho. Consistently. Y’all ain’t never friends w/ Black Women who don’t play that shit. Or even just a healthy mix of Black men and Black Women who even agree w y’all. 😂 Odd af. Y’all definitely cherry pick y’all dancing monkeys for testimony and line of defense — and they never fail to perform, I’ll give you that. You do not have Black friends tho. Tell your enablers to shut up since they’re so comfortable being silenced anyhow until you need ‘em.
Thank you for coming to my TED. ✌🏽😊
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