#this isn't part of like the main storyline what would be put in the book if i made it one

[cbrownjc]

Theory: Why this second 'Interview' is happening

So a few weeks ago, Rolin Jones said that there was a reason the second interview had to happen, which will be revealed this season. And we would learn the reason why one character needed it to happen in ep 2x05; then we would learn why another character needed it to happen in 2x08 (the season finale).

Now the person we will learn needs the second interview to happen in episode 2x05 will, IMO, be Louis. For now, he seems the most clear as being one of the two people IMO. For, as we saw in ep 2x01 Louis knows he hasn't been remembering everything correctly, but that he really wants to. At the moment, Louis has been (deliberately) sidetracked from thinking/wondering if anything else he remembers might not be fully correct but, by ep 2x05, he'll start questioning that again IMO.

Plus, for some reason, Louis is very insistent on this interview taking place and happening no matter what. Because just thinking over everything that has happened storywise up to this point? I actually don't think Louis is in any way fully aware of just how off his memories are. I think he knows something feels off or wrong but he can't quite fully place what that is.

So yes, IMO, Louis is the first character who needed the second interview to happen.

But who is the second character who needed the second interview to happen? Well, this theory very much includes book spoilers (that IMO the show is very much hinting at) to talk about, so I'm giving fair warning right now: this theory very deeply goes into something from the books, as well as tying into another theory I have for what might happen at the end of the season. So, just to be safe, I'm going to place this next part under a spoiler cut:

The character who, IMO, will be revealed as needing this second interview to happen, which we will learn in ep 2x08, will be Claudia.

Yep. IMO Claudia is the one who needed the second interview to happen. Or, more importantly, her spirit/ghost does.

And what clicked this for me is remembering something Delainey herself noted in an interview before the season started which was -- yes, Claudia's journals are there but even they can't give you a full and accurate picture of Claudia and her story. So how can Claudia speak and tell her story?

And that is where this second interview comes in. Because, if you know the book, Merrick, then you know that book contained what was thought to be an appearance of Claudia's ghost/spirit. But that wasn't the only book where we see Claudia's ghost/spirit. We also see her in Tale of the Body Theif . . . or, at least Lestat sees her.

And who was the main antagonist of TotBT? Raglan James. Who, hell, even if Justin Kirk really isn't Raglan James (and is actually Marius or someone else) still works IMO -- in the context of hinting toward that storyline that had Lestat haunted by memories of Claudia and dealing with seeing her "spirit" talking to him.

Because yes, I do think very much that Louis is seeing Claudia's spirit right now, in some way. Just like he did in the book Merrick.

And it's from seeing her spirit and just feeling that something is wrong wrt all of what's going on about it, that has Louis so insistent that this second interview has to happen.

And it's why four other people have come to do this same thing Daniel is doing and either ended up dead . . . or undead.

Hell because again, if you know the story in Merrick then you know Merrick Mayfair herself is the one Louis enlisted to help him summon and speak to Claudia's spirit in the first place; and she ended up putting Louis under a spell to make him turn her into a vampire.

Maybe that comment from Raglan James was a hint about that having already happened to the show's version of Merrick Mayfair. Who's maybe already been there to help summon Claudia's spirit in the first place?

Anyway . . .

IMO, Claudia's ghost/spirit is not only around, but IMO she wants what really happened to her to be known; the truth of not only why Louis and Lestat created her, but how she was failed by them and, most of all, the full truth of not only how she felt about both of them about it all, but also the truth surrounding her death (The Frankenstein Experiment) to not just be revealed but understood . . . mainly understood by Louis and Lestat.

And no, the reason Claudia's spirit wants this isn't benevolent. Just as the spirit of Claudia in the books wasn't benevolent when Lestat and Louis encountered her in them. What she wants, I think most of all, is for them both to face the truth of their actions and what that makes them (in her eyes).

I don't think Louis knows all this of course. I think he just knows Claudia's spirit is still around for some reason and that he thinks going over everything that happened wrt his life will help him figure that reason out.

And after four previously failed attempts Daniel was brought in for the simple reason that, unlike maybe three of the first four, Armand won't kill Daniel to stop this whole thing. (And, you know, if Merrick Mayfair was the first of those four, Daniel can't steal either of their blood to try and make himself a vampire.)

And can I just say, if this theory is correct, then I don't think Claudia's spirit is going to rest after she convinces Louis to do in the show what her spirit in the book convinced him to do. Because again, Lestat also got haunted by the spirit of Claudia in TotBT. And while I'm not sure he'd see her spirit in Season 3 when he begins to tell his story and POV of things (and so when we see Claudia it will be when she's alive during flashback sequences) I do think the show would be setting up for her spirit to do so going forward after that.

Because spirit entities do play a major role in what is to come in the overall story I think the show is heading to (which I and others think will be a combination of the Akasha and Amel threats in Queen of the Damned and Prince Lestat). Starting off by showing Claudia as a spirit entity can be used to begin to ease non-book readers into this concept IMO.

And all of this fits very much with why Armand not only doesn't want this interview to happen but still reluctantly let it happen. Because, if you know his backstory, Armand very much can see spirits and ghosts unaided. That is how strong his Mind Gift abilities are. So if Claudia's spirit/ghost is around in the Dubai penthouse, Armand would very well know that. And so would very much not want her spirit hanging around anymore if at all possible. Because of what Claudia's spirit could, at some point, communicate about him. ("My name is in some of those pages.")

Because I do think that while Louis does know about the role Armand played in Claudia's death, IMO Louis doesn't know about The Frankenstein Experiment. Because, in the books, nobody knew about that -- least of all Louis and Lestat -- until Armand himself revealed it over a century later in The Vampire Armand.

And the show is very much not cutting that moment out but, instead, has been hinting and foreshadowing about it.

I said in another post that I think Armand is, for lack of a better metaphor, like a little kid who wet the bed and now is trying to hide the sheets when it specifically comes to this. This is why he's against the interview happening because it being revealed will crumble the contented life he feels he's built with Louis in Dubai. Because Armand just craves love and being loved so much and not being alone . . . and is fearful he very much will be if this all goes in the direction it could.

One of Armand's major faults is that, when he loves someone, he tends to go way, way, WAY overboard in trying to either secure that person's love . . . or to keep it. If you know the book TVL, Armand did that with Lestat, (forcing himself into Lestat's mind and drinking Lestat's blood without permission), and that is the reason Lestat, in the end, could never trust Armand enough to be companions with him.

And Armand repeated that same pattern with Louis in Paris in allowing Claudia to be killed when, as coven master, he very well could have prevented it.

And now Armand is doing something way overboard, once again, in Dubai, in trying to hide the one thing regarding Claudia in Paris that Louis doesn't know about -- as well as keep Louis safe from doing something extreme if Louis remembers everything the real way it happened . . . as well as hiding the one thing about it all -- regarding Armand's own role in Claudia's fate that Louis still doesn't know about (and in the book Armand says he kept closely hidden until this moment).

Many book readers have always wondered about that Frankenstein reveal because, once Armand reveals it, it's never brought up again. We never hear how Louis and Lestat felt about learning about it. However, I think the show is very much going to give Louis and Lestat both a reaction to and about it when they learn of it. (And no, they are not going to kill Armand for it. But Armand might just be right to worry that Louis learning about it very well might cause his life with Louis in Dubai to be destroyed.)

So yeah, IMO, the second character that Rolin said would be revealed to be wanting this second interview in ep 2x08 is Claudia. And, IMO, this theory also fits with what Jacob said about this being Claudia's season more than anyone else's.

[butterflydm]

restructuring the wheel of time into ten books

So a little while ago, there was a poll about people's favored choice for how many books should have been in WoT -- I voted for 'ten' and this is, I guess, my argument for a ten book series.

Books 1-5, I don’t really have any notes on when it comes to structure. Every book is complete in and of itself. While books 2 & 3 do have something of a repetitive structure, I think that works better in a book series than in a tv series.

The only suggestions that I would have structurally would be minor things like “tweak Rand’s power levels in the early books to keep him more in line with what he does later” (aka what the show is doing, lol) and maybe not having Ishamael present during the Battle of Falme and having that purely against the Seanchan, so that we don’t have super similar climaxes for Rand two books in a row (Rand could get his wound in Tear instead). And those are the sorts of things that I think it might be likely that Jordan would have done if he’d known exactly how long the series would end up being -- ex. he clearly backed down on Rand’s power jump when he realized that the series would be going for longer than he’d originally planned.

One minor plot change that I would do is put Perrin feeling Rand tug at him as the epilogue of TFOH or thereabouts. Just a little hint of Perrin in there, showing that he'll have a bigger role in the next book.

Book 6, though... I have some thoughts there.

Lord of Chaos/A Crown of Swords: this is the first book where the beginning really takes some time getting off the ground -- there are several Salidar chapters that could have been combined. This is really the first place in the books where characters hang around doing nothing (we're told more than once in Elayne & Nynaeve's PoV that they're barely being taught anything and that being there feels pointless), waiting for it to be time to actually Do Some Plot (the big Healing of severing) and it's just the beginning of a bad trend.

The other structural change that I would suggest is not doing the weird feint with Mat's character where he starts off doing a "Rand's general" storyline and then creakily transitions over to Salidar instead. Since Mat isn't actually going to Illian, he doesn't need to be marching south. He could just still be in Cairhien/Caemlyn and have Rand take him to Salidar from there. As it is, we end up spending several chapters on a storyline that gets abruptly terminated part of the way through the book so that Mat can do a completely different storyline instead and that really pads out the pages unnecessarily (this was a really bad trend that happened with Mat's character in particular more than once in the books; his storylines would just stop in their tracks and get shifted to something else entirely and never go back to his original storyline; ex. we literally never find out why/what the murdered caravan of Tuatha'an had to do with anything, because Mat never bothers to tell Rand their message because he spends the entire rest of the book series doing completely unrelated things and only ever sees Rand again for a brief conversation that is dominated by everyone catering to his slaver wife -- we never get payoff for the vast majority of Mat's storylines, even the minor threads). It really does feel like Jordan started writing the book, then went "oh shit, Mat needs to meet & marry the DotNM" and just abruptly changed Mat's story to yeet him to Ebou Dar without actually rewriting the earlier bits in the book.

Outside of that, the main change I would suggest being made in these books is improving Min’s characterization and Min and Rand’s relationship by NOT having Min change herself for Rand. Let Rand fall in love with Min as she is, not the dolled-up version of Min that she invents for Rand’s benefit (there are other characterization tweaks I would recommend as well, but Min is kinda the biggest issue imo).

The main ‘story arc’ for Rand that's set up in LoC is ‘defeating Sammael’ and it should take place over the course of a single book, not two separate books. Parts of ACoS would be saved for the next book but the Illian climax should happen in the same book that the story starts. I would title this book “A Crown of Swords” so that the focus is on Rand’s story, not the Forsakens' (and part of the oddness here is definitely due to Jordan changing his mind about doing the Taim-Demandred combo, so he sets up something that ends up going nowhere).

Inciting incidents:

Egwene is summoned to Salidar leading to Rand sending Mat there as well

Min arrives in Caemlyn, leading to The Box Incident

Turning point:

After the Box incident, Perrin and Rand stage a fight so that Perrin can go find Masema

Egwene sends Elayne, Nynaeve, Mat & co to Ebou Dar to look for the Bowl of the Winds and they actually take advantage of Mat being ta’veren right away instead of waiting around for a month (all the delays in Mat's various storylines had a knock-on effect in delaying everyone else's storylines, imo -- the Slog happens because everyone is waiting on Mat, whether they know it or not)

Climax:

Rand defeats Sammael

The attack of the Seanchan on Ebou Dar begins

A Crown of Swords/The Path of Daggers/Winter’s Heart: The Path of Daggers only needs some of trimming imo. Once that trimming is done, I think Elayne’s section of the prologue of WH could slid into it fairly neatly as a bit of an ‘upbeat’ epilogue, which would be a contrast to the darkness of Rand’s ending in the previous book and his defeat here when he tries to repel the Seanchan from Ebou Dar.

Also have Mat interact with Tuon throughout this book, essentially like he did in WH (Mat's interactions with Tuon in WH make sense with his previous characterization; it's in CoT & KoD when Jordan had him completely reverse on his moral outlook on slavery so that he would be willing to make out with a slaver - genuinely, how Mat goes from sympathizing with slaves in WH to sympathizing with slavers in CoT remains one of the most baffling writing choices that I've ever run across; especially with how limp and one-sided it made everything about Mat & Tuon feel in those books for me, because Jordan drained all the potential interesting conflict out of the pairing so that he could focus on Mat navel-gazing about his self-inflicted prophecy woes, making him just Min 2.0. *sigh*). This book I would choose to be named “The Path of Daggers” out of the available options.

Inciting incidents:

Elayne & Nynaeve use the Bowl of the Winds as Ebou Dar is invaded by the Seanchan and Mat gets left behind during the escape

Perrin & co find Masema, etc.

Egwene uses the rule of law to take control of the Salidar Aes Sedai

Turning point:

Mat first meets Tuon -- maybe give Mat & Tylin’s first meeting to Mat & Tuon instead, where he accidentally greets her using the Old Tongue, thus sparking her interest (cut out Mat & Tylin’s ‘relationship’ entirely, it was zero percent needed and is needed even less if Tuon arrives in the first wave of the attack, as I'm suggesting here)

Rand learns about the invasion by the Seanchan and goes campaigning

Egwene & the Aes Sedai jump to Tar Valon and begin their siege (since they no longer need to kill time to let Mat's plotline happen)

Climax:

Rand fails to defeat the Seanchan & gets attacked in the Sun Palace but kills the attackers here instead of us needing the Far Madding detour (which just felt like a less emotionally-impactful version of The Box to me and Jordan giving in to his desire to write a travelogue)

Faile learns Masema is dealing with the Seanchan and kills him, cutting off that entire path of slog by not getting kidnapped (we really only need one kidnapped wife imo)

Mat escapes Ebou Dar, kidnapping Tuon along the way (there's our allotted Kidnapped Wife)

Egwene is captured by the White Tower Aes Sedai when the rebels block off the harbors to Tar Valon

Winter’s Heart/Crossroads of Twilight/Knife of Dreams: All three of these books would have greatly benefited from being massively cut down to a single volume. This one also has a touch of TGS in it, mostly because Egwene had a lot more story left after KoD than pretty much any other character except maybe Mat.

Specific items to change or cut:

Cut out Far Madding entirely (Rand killed the attackers in Cairhien). Since Tuon arrived with the initial Seanchan invasion fleet in Ebou Dar, Nynaeve can be honest with Rand about Mat being left behind but Rand can see (in his color swirl vision) that Mat is no longer in Ebou Dar and has already escaped, filling that plot hole (the list of contrivances to keep Rand from knowing what happened to Mat frustrated and annoyed me so much when I was reading books WH-KoD).

Have the love confessions and Rand sleeping with Elayne, but don’t do the bonding yet. Have Rand leave Min behind in Caemlyn when he takes Nynaeve off to do the cleansing, so she can (emotionally) bond with Elayne & Aviendha. Since Min was just at ground zero for a terrible attack that was focused on Rand (which should, to Rand, prove his fears about being a danger to the people he loves to be correct!), it really is so bizarre that he keeps backpacking her around to dangerous place (Far Madding) after dangerous place (the Cleansing) after dangerous place (parlay with the Seanchan) and mostly shows that Jordan a) just had no more plot beats for Min until she played pregnancy test for Tuon in the epilogue and b) primarily saw Min as Rand’s Hero Reward rather than a character in her own right. But the whole affair mostly just undermined Rand’s character journey for me (he's so isolated! ...except for his live-in girlfriend).

Don’t do the Shaido plotline at all (have the Shaido scatter back to the Waste post-Dumai’s Wells); instead this should be where Perrin starts his wolf boot camp, so that he actually has a more appropriate amount of time for training before the Last Battle (and his emotional storyline would be a conflict with Faile over her killing Masema). I guess you can do the Whitecloaks storyline here.

Have Mat be the one to make a treaty with the Seanchan, and have Semirhage order the ‘airfleet’ against the White Tower instead of Tuon doing it. Instead of Mat accidentally giving himself away for nothing, have the Mat-Tuon marriage as part of the deal to seal the treaty, since Mat has figured out that she believes that he needs to be her husband, per prophecy, so he uses that to actually get concessions out of her. Because we aren’t trying to convince the readers that Mat is the sort of person who is capable of falling in love with a slaver in the space of a single month, we don’t need to spend two whole books wandering the Altaran countryside doing random shit and instead can get to the politics of it all. Let Mat actually continue to be smart and empathetic in this section of the storyline, rather than lopping off those parts of him and turning him into a zombie bootlicker yes-man. You can still layer in elements of Mat seeing potential in Tuon to be more than just a slaver, just don't have him toss his entire brain & morals away in order to kiss her ass.

Out of the available titles here, I think “Knife of Dreams” is the best one.

Inciting incidents:

Egwene undermines Elaida from within the Tower

Perrin starts Wolf Boot Camp

Rand & Nynaeve cleanse saidin

Turning Point:

Rand faces off against Semirhage and captures her

Egwene finds out from Verin about the extent of the Black Ajah in the White Tower

Aviendha leaves to go to Rhuidean to become a WO

Mat finds out that sul'dam (and thus Tuon) can channel and actually uses it as a negotiation tactic against her, please let this man use his brain during literally any of his conversations with Tuon, I am begging you. The way he reacts in the books to finding out that Tuon is a sul'dam and then that Tuon can channel is SO FUCKING BIZARRE. He just Does Not Care about slavery at all in CoT & KoD and is all Me Me Me about all of the Tuon revelations. In the previous books, Mat claims to be selfish even while constantly doing heroic/selfless things, but in CoT & KoD, he really does just come across as a genuine selfish bastard, someone who only thinks about himself and who doesn't give a shit about anyone else.

Climax:

Tuon and Mat agree on the terms of their marriage alliance and Say The Words

Elayne defeats her fellow claimants to the throne; maybe Min helps root out that Darkfriend captain in her guards, which would lend weight to her being able to do the same later for Tuon and also make it so that Min is at least as helpful to Team Light as she was to the Seanchan

The Seanchan (sent by Semirhage before she went to face Rand) attack the White Tower.

The Gathering Storm/Towers of Midnight: ToM has never made any sense as a title, so I would call this combined book “The Gathering Storm”. This section is more about putting things in a somewhat different order than they happened in the books, with a few tweaks.

Inciting Incidents:

Egwene defeats the Seanchan at the White Tower

Semirhage is freed by Elza and captures Rand, and (stealing @markantonys's excellent suggestion) Nynaeve is the one targeted when Semirhage forces Rand to her will, making Rand push Nynaeve away 'for her protection'

Rand and Egwene have a tense encounter that makes her doubt his sanity.

Turning point:

After taking the test to become full Aes Sedai, Nynaeve gets Lan's bond from Myrelle and then, since Myrelle was literally right outside the Black Tower at the time, Nynaeve and Logain deal with the Black Tower

Egwene deals with the assassins in the Tower (Gawyn subplot)

Perrin deals with the dreamspike and kills Slayer | Egwene deals with Mesaana

Aviendha returns from Rhuidean and reunites with Elayne & Min

Climax:

Rand attacks his father, leading to the moment on Dragonmount

post-epiphany, Rand actually goes to check in on his friends and loved ones, thus making his epiphany have an impact on the storyline -- he Travels to where Mat is and is the one who helps Mat get from Point A (Altara) to Point B (Caemlyn) and letting them actually have a real reunion, delivering Aludra to Elayne, where she is ready to make weapons. In Caemlyn, he talks to Elayne, Aviendha, & Min, leading into the bonding moment.

Mat saves Moiraine from the Tower of Ghenjei.

(epilogue) Tuon arrives back in Ebou Dar and takes control of the Seanchan forces, letting everyone know that there is now a treaty with the Westlands. Her going back with a treaty already tentatively in place would actually make the triumphant tone that the books try to take her with her return make a lot more sense than... readers apparently supposed to be happy??? that one slaver is taking over from another slaver, even though Tuon is just as willing to do awful shit to our protagonists as Suroth was, so it feels like a distinction without a difference to me. Technically, is Tuon marginally better than Suroth? Eh, maybe, but not by much.

A Memory of Light: Most of my changes here either follow from earlier ones (we already have a treaty with the Seanchan, so Mat can just go to Merrilor to start General’ing right away), but apart from that:

Let the Emond’s Field Five (plus Elayne) have a group reunion! (easier to do in this version where Mat's storyline isn't all about sucking up to Tuon, I admit)

Let Perrin and Mat be at Rand’s funeral! (genuinely so bizarre that Sanderson didn't do a one-sentence fix of this tbh; that would have been the easiest thing in the world to fix. One sentence is all you would have needed.)

Let Moiraine be the person who realizes that Rand is still alive, not Cadsuane.

The battle itself could have been cut down somewhat in order to leave more room for character interactions (we probably don't need three separate sword duels for Demandred; kinda excessive). This is a goodbye to people some of us spent over a decade loving; we should be given proper goodbyes to them.

I also feel like there's no need to have everyone and their brother know that Rand is in a relationship with three women? And it felt pointless to have people know that Rand is the father of Elayne's kids too. Have Rand tell his dad (and then have Tam actually act like he has that knowledge during his scenes with Elayne; it is genuinely bizarre how formal Tam and Elayne's interactions were in AMoL; she knows that he's Rand's dad! That's the grandfather of her kids!) but there's no need for a continent-wide memo about Rand's love life. I know this was likely all because of the epilogue where the whole world knows about ~the three~ grieving widows but this is all about a theoretical world of only ten books total, so some tweaking of the epilogue is happening regardless.

Inciting incidents:

Moiraine arrives (with Mat) to help heal the rift between Egwene and Rand

Darkfriends attack Caemlyn through the Ways

Climax:

Rand vs The Dark One

Everyone else vs the Shadow’s forces

So, that would leave us with ten books total (plus the New Spring prequel):

The Eye of the World: the journey begins

The Great Hunt: more important plot elements are introduced, like the Seanchan; Rand begins to learn leadership

The Dragon Reborn: Rand accepts being the Dragon Reborn & takes on a full-time leadership role; Mat now has his luck & Perrin has met Faile

The Shadow Rising: Perrin takes on a leadership role when he leads the defense of the Two Rivers

The Fires of Heaven: Mat takes on a leadership role during the Battle of Cairhien, creating the Band of the Red Hand

A Crown of Swords: Egwene takes on a leadership role by becoming Amyrlin Seat of the rebel Aes Sedai

The Path of Daggers: Elayne takes on a leadership role by putting in her claim to become Queen of Andor

Knife of Dreams: Rand & Nynaeve reverse the Dark One’s counterstroke and then Rand tries and fails to make an alliance with the Seanchan (fake!Tuon); Perrin goes to wolf boot camp; Mat makes a treaty with the Seanchan via marriage alliance to the DotNM; Elayne gets all ten Houses she needs to secure the throne; Egwene has all-but won over the White Tower as well.

The Gathering Storm: we all prepare for the Last Battle; Rand has his epiphany, in whatever form it takes; Mat saves Moiraine; Perrin defeats Slayer; Egwene and Elayne prepare their respective areas for TLB.

A Memory of Light: the journey ends (for this age)

I feel like this gives us a more consistent build-up to the ending, with each piece building upon the ones before, and not taking an excessive amount of time with subplots in the endgame. Each character also has a more consistent progression as well.

Rand

tEotW: worries about being a male channeler

TGH: told he is the Dragon Reborn but assumes the White Tower wants to use him as a false Dragon

TDR: goes on a journey to prove whether or not he’s TDR and proves that he is; taking control of Tear

TSR: becomes the Car’a’carn

TFoH: takes control of Cairhien

ACoS: takes control of Illian

TPoD: has his first major failure when he is unable to repel the Seanchan from Ebou Dar

KoD: succeeds in cleansing saidin but fails to make peace with the Seanchan

TGS: has rock-bottom moment and then his epiphany; he learns he doesn’t have to do it All On His Own

AMoL: re-seals TDO

Egwene

tEotW: sets off an adventure

TGH: experiences great trauma at the hands of the Seanchan

TDR: Black Ajah Hunter

TSR: Goes to the Aiel Waste to begin her training

TFoH: One of her mentors (Moiraine) dies

ACoS: is called to take on a leadership position

TPoD: takes control of the rebel Aes Sedai

KoD: besieges Tar Valon and is captured

TGS: become Amrylin of a united White Tower

AMoL: leads in the Last Battle and becomes an inspirational figure

Perrin

tEotW: discovers that he’s a wolfbrother

TGH: is first placed in a leadership position when Rand disappears

TDR: meets Faile

TSR: defends the Two Rivers (Slayer introduced)

TFoH: feels the tug of ta’veren and leaves the Two Rivers again

ACoS: saves Rand

TPoD: finds Masema; Faile kills Masema

KoD: Wolf Boot Camp

TGS: deals with Slayer in the Wolf Dream

AMoL: leads the wolves at the Last Battle (instead of it being Elyas)

Nynaeve

tEotW: sets out to protect the four kiddos

TGH: adopts Elayne as a fifth kiddo

TDR: Black Ajah Hunter

TSR: Tanchico & the SAD bracelets; Egeanin

TFoH: defeating Rahvin & capturing Moghedien

ACoS: Salidar & Ebou Dar

TPoD: using the Bowl of the Winds

KoD: cleansing saidin

TGS: the Black Tower plotline

AMoL: with Rand at the climax of TLB; being the Ultimate Protector

Mat

tEotW: finds the dagger

TGH: blows the Horn of Valere

TDR: discovers his luck

TSR: Rhuidean & prophecy

TFoH: the Battle of Cairhien & the Band of the Red Hand

ACoS: Salidar & Seanchan invasion in Ebou Dar

TPoD: meets & kidnaps the Daughter of the Nine Moons

KoD: forms a marriage alliance with the Daughter of the Nine Moons

TGS: saving Moiraine

AMoL: General of the forces of Light at the Last Battle

Elayne

tEotW: meets Rand, heads off to Tar Valon

TGH: gets a found family in Egwene, Nynaeve, & Min

TDR: Black Ajah Hunter (meets Aviendha)

TSR: Tanchico & the SAD bracelets; Egeanin

TFoH: bonding Birgitte; Circus storyline

ACoS: Salidar & Ebou Dar

TPoD: using the Bowl of the Winds & heading to Andor

KoD: becoming Queen (plot climax)

TGS: bonds Rand (emotional climax)

AMoL: powerful leader during the Last Battle

[lady-embers]

Gwyneth Bedara

Gwyn is an important character in ACOSF.

She is one of Nesta best friend and was vital to Nesta healing journey. She was the first one to cut the ribbon to become a Valkyrie. Heck, she was the one who pretty much brought the Valkyries back. She is now Carythian after winning in the Blood Rite. She has unexplored powers, parentage, and back history.

Her character has been set up to become a main character. And you know a damning piece of evidence for this?

This right here:

Why would Sarah put this in ACOSF if it wasn't going to mean/foreshadow that Gwyn will have a bigger role to play in the series?

She had Gwyn convincing Merrill to include them in the penultimate chapter, wrote it herself, and it was about the rebirth of the Valkyries and what they are doing. We know the Valkyrie storyline isn't done just yet and I have a feeling they'll play a bigger part in the BIG war that is still to come. Again, Gwyn became the first Valkyrie. That is telling in itself given ACOSF is Nesta book so why wasn't she the first to become a Valkyrie?

"You had this much to say about us?" Gwyn answered "with more to come" and "Our stories are worth telling" <------ that right there is really all the evidence I need to know Gwyn will more than likely become a female MC and not be regulated to just being a side character.

[fractualized]

Three Jokers Are Not Better Than One

(or, cheap twists don't make a good story)

Would you look at that? It's time to bitch about Three Jokers!

(spoilers for a 3-year-old comic ahead)

Gotham War got me into hater mode, so I figured it was time to take a second look at Three Jokers, written by Geoff Johns and drawn by Jason Fabok. I first read it when the issues came out, and I thought it was possible that the story isn't as bad as I remembered. I don't know why, since for the past three years I've been haunted by the possibility of it being deemed canon.

Of course, at the time of conception, Three Jokers was intended to be canon. Johns set up the premise in the Darkseid War storyline of the 2011 Justice League run, in issues published in 2015/2016. Batman takes control of the omniscient Mobius Chair, and he tests it by asking who killed his parents. Then he asks a second question, which Hal Jordan presses him on several issues later.

[Justice League (2011) #42 & Justice League (2011) #50]

Four years later, when Three Jokers was set to be released towards the end of 2020, Johns did at first confirm it would be canon despite being released via Black Label, where books are not meant to be part of the larger continuity. In later interviews, however, this assertion got walked back in favor of saying the canonicity is up to each reader, which is kind of a wild thing to say. "Look, this story merely proposes that one of our most popular characters has actually been three different dudes the whole time, which totally has a negligible impact on how that character should be seen and has interacted with the world. Take it or leave it!"

But then, DC's idea of canon has been pretty squiggly of late, especially with the increasing multiverse shenanigans. In the final issue of Dark Knights: Death Metal in 2021, the reader is told, "with our past finally set, myriad new futures are opening up. And as hypertime heals, we'll likely experience flashes of them– and even alternate pasts– in pretty epic fashion." Infinite Frontier followed, with a press release declaring, "When our heroes saved the Multiverse from Perpetua in Dark Nights: Death Metal, everything was put back where it belonged… and we do mean everything. All the damage from all the Crises was undone [....]"

I have a lot of thoughts about this, revolving around what the heck does it mean for storytelling and how we should understand characters that apparently, somehow, everything is canon? How are we supposed to take this as anything other than the omniverse being an excuse for DC Editorial to wave off responsibility for a legible timeline? "Batman can be in two places at once because, uh, the Monitor sneezed?"

But this too-long essay is about Three Jokers, so I'll narrow my concern: if character histories can simply change with a multiversal glitch, in whatever overwrought way those are usually explained to us, then it sure feels like it doesn't matter that Three Jokers was published under Black Label. It sure seems like, at whoever's whim, Three Jokers can still get locked into the main storyline. I mean, Zdarsky still hasn't explained what that three Jokers shit in Batman #135 is about. On the other hand, we know that the explanation for the two Jokers in The Man Who Stopped Laughing does not involve the multiverse, and Joker is supposed to reunite with Batman over in Zdarsky's story when that story closes out, so… I actually have no reason to be confident that means anything.

"But why would Three Jokers getting canonized be so bad?" you may ask if you've never read Three Jokers (or if you fully enjoyed it).

Speaking for myself, it starts with the premise: taking a character and saying, "actually, this is not one complex guy but three different guys, which fractures the character's motivations and relationships over the last several decades." When that character is one you enjoy very much, this twist is not fun. It's a fundamental change to who they are.

Then five months before the release of Three Jokers #1, Johns and Fabok did an interview with Entertainment Weekly. Some things the pair said raised red flags:

1) Three Jokers' story would focus on the trauma that Barbara, Jason, and Bruce suffered at Joker's hands, per Johns. "If you suffer some trauma, you don’t just get over with it and move on with your life, it changes who you are. Sometimes it changes you for the better, sometimes it changes you for the worse. You can heal right, and you can heal wrong. That’s really what the book’s about: Healing right, healing wrong, and surviving."

2) Johns also said of the story: “It goes back to the beginning when Batman first encountered the Joker, but it’s also The Killing Joke and A Death in the Family that speak to the book and that we’re building off emotionally." And Fabok mentioned that the book's look would be based on the aesthetics of The Killing Joke: "I really want it to feel like it could be a spiritual sequel, at least artistically."

These remarks foreshadowed a disconnect. A key part of The Killing Joke itself is that both Joker and Bruce experienced terrible trauma ("one bad day"), but in responding to it, they made different choices: broadly, Joker choosing to hurt people versus Bruce choosing to help people. Johns excluding Joker from his comments about trauma felt like a sign that he ignored a key part of the character, despite Joker being a core part of a new tale "emotionally" inspired by TKJ.

(We're setting aside "you can heal right and you can heal wrong" for now. Ohhh, we'll get back to that.)

Johns' blind spot was confirmed a few months later when he was quoted by the DC Nation Twitter account: "There are very few characters that are, to me, as irredeemable as The Joker. There is nothing in him that is good."

Wow, what close analysis from Mr. Emotional Build.

Look, I don't need Joker to be redeemed or woobified. (Ask me about the "Pushback" storyline from 2004 and hear my gnashing teeth crack a filling.) But I would like the full breadth of his character acknowledged, especially when you're claiming you're writing about trauma, especially when you're creating a "spiritual sequel" to one of best known Joker stories (if not the best known one).

Then Three Jokers finally came out, and over three months it proved to be neither an examination of healing nor very interesting, at least not in an enjoyable way. What it has to "say" about trauma, for any of the characters, is no different than the limited conclusion made in previous Batman books: mainly the drumbeat of fighting off the darkness by being a bigger person— or at least not killing your enemy. Making Joker into a role played by three different people adds nothing; it amounts to little more than a gimmick.

Hell, even as a gimmick, it's flawed. Theoretically, the three Jokers represent phases of personality the Joker has embodied over the years— but the representations we get don't make sense. Here they are summed up in Book 3:

Sorry, what? The Criminal is less interested in theatrics? In what time period was the Joker ever not interested in making a big show of things in one way or another? Maybe this is supposed to be an "early" Joker in terms of the Rebirth/InfiniCrisisDarkCarnateTier/whatever more recent conception of him, but I'll wager that's not what people think about when they think of Joker at his start. They think about Golden Age Joker doing goofy shit and laughing maniacally. They're not expecting this morose man.

The other thing is that, in Book 1, the narrative "assigns" each of our three protagonists to a Joker: Bruce to the Criminal, who appeared at the start; Barbara to the Comedian, who shot her; and Jason to the Clown, who killed him. Now at first I thought Johns was saying one Joker took over after another, but since Barbara's attack and Jason's death happened 9 months apart in 1988, which are not different Joker eras, I think we're supposed to see them as sort of… cycling on and off depending on the needs of the scheme? Maybe? But the descriptions above are still confusing. Why am I supposed to see the Joker who got carried away with the fun of beating Jason with a crowbar and successfully blew him up as less sadistic than the other one?

Johns does appear to lampshade this confusion in the middle of Book 1, when we get all three Jokers in a cabin in the woods. The Clown and the Comedian have this exchange:

This and a later panel with the Comedian actually imply that he and the Clown are interchangeable, even though they're supposed to be different. So are they or not? Is there an actual reason we need three Jokers, or did Johns just think it was a neato idea and then spend four years trying to figure out a "layered" justification for it?

The other thing about this cabin scene, and about the Joker trio largely, is that it should be fun and it's not. There should be chaos! Zaniness! At the very least, all the narcissism in the room should generate a competitive friction, make their interactions more dynamic. (Really it should generate bloodshed and end with one man standing within like ten minutes, but I'll grant the choice to save that for Book 3.) Instead it's almost mundane. The cabin isn't even decorated! It's dark and dreary, like the Jokers are dark and dreary. If we're gonna have three Jokers, can't they at least be Jokering with each other?

The same thought comes when I consider the very beginning of Book 1. It all starts out like a typical Batman story: three deadly crimes are committed in one night, the Joker seemingly responsible for all of them, and Bruce, Barbara, and Jason are drawn together as they try to figure out what's up. Of course, thanks to the Magic Chair, Bruce already knows there are three clowns, but Barbara and Jason are thinking that Joker is working with two look-alikes to create confusion. And considering the basics of what happens in this story, what the Comedian's larger plan is meant to accomplish, why couldn't this have been written with just two look-alikes? I mean, yeah, it would require Johns to forget about his continuity bomb, but maybe the story would have been better (and shorter). Again, the creation of other Jokers isn't doing much for what the plot is getting at. The three crimes that start us off would still serve the function of reminding Bruce of how Joker's been a constant in his life. The taunting of a convincing Joker look-alike is enough to set off Jason's anger and sadness about what happened to him, and his fears of what he could become. The climax with Joe Chill would have to be redone, but the threat of him being Jokerized isn't the crucial plot point; the Comedian's film of him is. Bruce doesn't even have any substantial thoughts about there being three of his nemesis.

But, alas, the story goes how it goes. And as it goes, we also see that Jason behaves more cruelly in his search for Joker than Barbara and Bruce. For example, Jason attacks and threatens one of Joker's victims to get information, feeling justified because the guy has a rap sheet, while Barbara scolds him and Bruce tells the victim, "I'm sorry this happened." What I find notable about this is that while comics regularly present Jason as hot-headed and Barbara as reasonable, Bruce… uh… If you gather a random selection of Batman comics, you'll find that his level of violence is all over the place. This story, however, requires a more somber Bruce, whose violence is more reactive, because Jason and Barbara serve Johns' dichotomy of "heal right" versus "heal wrong." We can't have Bruce on the sadistic side of the scale fucking that up, and besides, Jason's long been the posterboy for healing "wrong."

That notion comes to a head at the end of the issue. The heroes have encountered and subdued the Clown at the aquarium when Jim Gordon calls. The GCPD found another Joker, and Bruce leaves Jason and Barbara alone with the Clown to assist.

Goodness me, who could have predicted Jason might kill a restrained Joker? Not Bruce, who absolutely should have. Barbara is there to talk Jason down, sure, but what else is the Clown gonna do but needle Jason to kill him?

The Clown cackles then, declaring that Red Hood is his Robin, for the very reason of his violent impulses and how much he upsets the Bat, and of course Jason shoots him in the head, because oof.

Honestly, on this second read I found this scene a smidge too oof. Jason was a determined little Robin, dedicated to saving his awful mother to the very end, and him cracking and declaring that he'll work for a criminal… I don't know. I don't think it's impossible, but it feels superfluous. I don't think such a reveal is necessary to get Jason to fire. I think the Clown focusing on how the new Red Hood is actually quite similar to the old, as well as how Jason matters less than the neverending battle between Batman and Joker, is enough emotional stress to get to the same end result.

But that's a minor quibble; we've got bigger fish to fry! Such as the specter of the "healed right/healed wrong" dynamic that reappears as Barbara and Jason argue over the Clown's corpse.

Barbara leaves angrily after this, but man. I wish the story overall took more cues from this scene, that in a Black Label story we could stray from the simplistic idea of how a Good One would save Joker and a Bad One wouldn't. I want to explore Jason's assertion that Barbara didn't do her best to uphold Bruce's one rule. I want to know if maybe she's tired of being the fucking Good One.

Hell, let's go further: what if we were surprised by Barbara killing the Clown before Jason could? The Clown's taunting about Jason could have gotten to her too. We could have a story about how being put on a pedestal as a Good Victim is a cage, about Barbara struggling with falling from that position, about Jason feeling unsure if he should commend her for an act that obviously hurts her or comfort her for something he would have done himself. That's an actual examination of the struggle to process violent trauma— that you don't need three Jokers for!

But the story we have never gets back to Jason's suggestion that Barbara let the murder happen, not in this issue or the following two. This issue just ends with Jason hoping that the Clown was the actual Joker and that he didn't kill the wrong guy, which is a pretty "LOL oh yeah" line when you remember that he and Barbara don't know there are three Jokers yet.

Book 1, truth be told, isn't that bad. On my reread, I started to wonder if my only real issue with the story is that it's not as engaging as all the hype insisted it would be.

Then Book 2 starts, and goddammit. GODDAMMIT.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: why can we not have more DC writers having fun with Joker's multiple-choice backstory? Why did Johns read The Killing Joke and decide his interpretation would be this?:

Ugh. UGGGHHH.

I don't recall the issue, but there's these panels that circulate sometimes of Harley Quinn encountering Joker in Arkham or prison, in which they exchange words about their relationship and he's a creep and she kicks his ass. I have no problem with Harley kicking Joker's ass. He deserves it. My problem is that those panels play out like an empowerment scene in a generic Lifetime movie. My problem is that it doesn't have the flavor of Harley and Joker. My problem is that it's lazy.

And that's my problem with what Johns does with Joker's backstory in TKJ. He could take it anywhere, and he goes gritty without an ounce of nuance. Because hey, this is Joker, and  "there is nothing in him that is good," right? We'll just ignore that one of DC's all-time classics, the one this garbage is ✨inspired by✨, has Joker reflecting on a past for which he is an unreliable narrator, but in which he laments how his comedy dream put his growing family in a bad spot, in which he desperately aligns with shady people so his family can be secure, in which he's devastated by losing the only person he has in the world and their growing baby. And these memories could be distorted or entirely fake, but what's interesting in TKJ is that Joker never tells anyone else about them, even in his big speech to Batman. The flashbacks are not part of an attempt to manipulate anyone or convince them his world view is correct. It's a tale in Joker's head that, regardless of the truth, deeply affects him. It's what drove him to go to horrendous lengths to prove his point, even if the point is wrong.

But fuck that, right? We're going lazy! We're going cheap! We're going with the Jeannie backstory, but actually Joker was only terrible to her. The Comedian fondly fantasizes about terrorizing her and their son, because he's 100% an abuser, because he must have always been that way, with not a single appealing quality that we need to reckon with as we so often do with toxic people in real life. Even the freaking stutter Joker had as he struggled with stand-up comedy is given to Jeannie. Seriously?

I cannot emphasize enough: fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck this "take."

On the other hand, when the Comedian is brought out of his stupor, we do finally get something super funny:

At least we'll always have this panel of Joker eating cat food.

The Criminal only interrupted the daydream because he's mad the Clown is dead, and the Clown was so eager to be dead I thought it was part of their plan buuuuuuut I guess not. Then we jump to Bruce figuring out that the "Joker" that Gordon cornered is just another victim, a dead judge. Barbara appears to tell Bruce what Jason did, and they discuss it over comms on the road.

Bruce, shockingly, says that they can't really do anything about what Jason did.

Pretty sure the guy who batarang'd Jason's throat rather than let him kill Joker would have a more intense reaction than this?? Or any reaction other than sober understanding? Maybe Bruce is still coping with finally dealing with three Jokers at once and will flip his shit when this all resolves. Or maybe he's just thinking, "it's okay, I still have two emotional support clowns left!" I don't know. He's so weirdly passive in this story.

What's more aggravating, though, is the other aspect of this conversation, that Jason "healed wrong." It would be one thing as a pat judgment Bruce is making, but we know from that interview that Johns positioned "healed right versus healed wrong" as the story's theme. It's not good. It's way too glib a framing for evaluating how people who've gone through trauma are dealing with it, in any context. Sure, there are better and worse coping mechanisms, better and worse outcomes, but healing is an ongoing process that can be so individualized. Reducing it to "right" and "wrong," saying that one is "strong" and implying that the other comes from some sort of deficiency… I hope Johns just spoke poorly and he does understand that it's not that simple.

Now, is it a stretch to apply that critique to Jason killing criminals at his whim? Sure, deciding that you personally should play the role of judge, jury, and executioner is not a good way to deal with trauma. But that's not exactly what's happening here. This "healed right versus healed wrong" framing is being applied to Jason Todd going after the Joker. Obviously, I like Joker, but can we be real about this? Can we be real in a Black Label book, the imprint where comic books (allegedly) have room to take things more seriously? Can we take the question of, "In this fictional world where Joker is an unstoppable fatal mayhem machine— now THREE machines— is it completely out of bounds for someone to finally kill him?" and be like, "Errr…not really?" When this story explicitly denies Joker even one teeny redeeming human quality, are we seriously still going to say, "Well, you know, if Jason takes the life of the man who murdered him and millions other people, because he doesn't want him to kill more people, which Joker will absolutely do and we all know it, doesn't that say something awful about Jason?" Are we really??

Plus the judgment about healing is put into the mouth of a man who— say it with me!— regularly dresses as a bat and beats the ever-loving shit out of people because his parents were murdered. Toning Bruce down in this particular story doesn't hide that.

Although, what I think is intended as a flawed assumption on Bruce's part is his other line, "Jason's suffering." It implies that Barbara still isn't, but we are shown Barbara reflecting on her paralyzation, even now when she's "strong" and has healed "right." And the story will get into this a bit later, but it absolutely does not let Barbara and Jason escape the dichotomy. To the story's detriment, their interactions go in a wild direction, but we'll get to that.

First, Bruce and Barbara's investigation leads them to Blackgate, because the fingerprints on the murder weapon for the dead judge belong to none other than Joe Chill. However, we learn that Chill has been in the medical wing for two months because he's sick with cancer.

Meanwhile, Jason's investigation leads him to a closed athletic center. The pool inside is filled with the chemicals stolen from Ace at the start of the story, as well as dozens of pale naked bodies with green hair. Jason's attempt to contact Barbara is interrupted when one of said bodies bursts to life and grabs his ankle, asking for help. Jason reacts with hostility, kicking the poor guy, and I'm not sure if it's because he's unnerved by a room of floating Jokers or if it's pretty normal for him to not keep his cool even for the sake of an obvious victim of a horrible crime. A Gotham City vigilante can't be that shocked by one guy being alive in a pile of bodies, can they?

But that's all setup. When the guy falls unconscious, the Criminal and the Comedian ambush Jason and drag him away, one saying, "He'll be perfect."

It's a line that meanly gets your hopes up, poking at a subject that could make all this more interesting.

Jason awakes, strapped to a chair and as naked as the bodies in the pool. The Criminal says he and his pals have spent a lot of time trying to find the perfect candidate for a new Joker, and he repeats the question of what's up with Jason taking on the Red Hood moniker.

It seems that, like DCAU Tim Drake in Batman Beyond before him, Jason Todd will be transformed into a fourth Joker! But it won't only be because it will wreck the Batman. It'll be because Joker already sees himself in Jason. This is something new to explore! There are places to go here; other comics hinting at Joker's past point to him having a childhood not dissimilar to Jason's, of growing up on the street, experiencing abuse, and learning unpalatable ways to survive. We could see Jason struggling with the possibility that he has more in common with Joker than he wants to think about!

But we won't. Inexplicably, the Criminal turns around and says that despite their similarities, despite Jason hating Batman as much as he does, despite the Comedian (presumably) saying Jason is perfect, and despite getting Jason ready for the pool, Jason actually isn't good enough, not "bright" enough. (Because all the Jokers we have in this dour story are so bright?)

And then the Comedian just beats the hell out of Jason (saying it's more fun than the first time, in another annoying nod to how he and the Clown are the same damn Joker) and says they're leaving Jason alive because maybe he'll prove them wrong and he'll become a new Joker after all? But the current Jokers aren't really going to go for it. Their interest is just abandoned.

The point is only to freak Jason out, so when Bruce and Barbara arrive, fight a horde of Jokerized victims, and find Jason alone and naked and vulnerable, he does not react well when Bruce tries to ask if he's okay. Jason turns on him and blames him for setting him on this path, for leaving him in the dirt, for replacing him easily. He lashes out at Barbara too, asking if she's going to lock him away, but ultimately it's easier to take comfort from her.

A direct reference to Return of the Joker here, focusing on the shadow Batman casts over the lives of his partners, the responsibility he bears in how Joker targeted them to hurt the Bat, and how poorly he offers comfort himself.

It does segue nicely into the next scene, when Bruce and Barbara get Jason to her apartment to rest. Bruce leaves to keep investigating, and Barbara is pissed because this is the exact lack of support that contributed to Jason going his own way. Support is highlighted again when Jason wakes in Barbara's room and looks around.

Aside from Barbara seeking out books to deal with her physical and mental struggles after Joker's attack, the old calendars show the help she received from her father and health professionals.

And this scene does get into something that's missing from TKJ, in which Bruce tells Joker that no, not everyone will retreat to madness like he did. How we react to trauma is greatly affected by the resources available to us.

This scene is nice. It's nice to come from the action to some place quiet and for someone to say this Jason, something he's wanted to hear. It's late in coming, but it's pain validated.

And then Johns fucking ruins it.

Man. Just. Ugh. Yeah, I know people seek comfort in moments of vulnerability, but… the reader knows. The reader knows moments like this aren't included to be like "oh, this was an isolated blip of human behavior! The story won't call back to it later!" Johns apparently wants Barbara/Jason to be a thing. And if you want a solid reason for that… well, we don't get any good ones.

Meanwhile, Bruce is in the cave, and I'm only mentioning that because these folder labels are incredibly funny:

Then the issue ends with Joe Chill kidnapped from Blackgate by the Comedian, who has a video camera and asks him to talk about why he really killed the Waynes. Dun dun dunnnnnnnn! Is that a twist on the way?! Well, yeah, but not really the one you think and it's incredibly stupid.

Finally we are at Book 3. Jason is suited back up, and he and Barbara have met up with Bruce in the cave to figure out how the Jokers plan to create another, better Joker.

Soooooo Jason and Barbara had that whole conversation. Jason was shaken by what the Jokers said to him. But now he's completely back on track. Allllllrighty.

Jason and Bruce then have an argument rehashing everything that Barbara said she was sorry Jason experienced, with Bruce saying of course he'd love to kill the Joker, and Jason pointing out that he obviously hasn't. Jason also says he thinks the only reason Bruce isn't turning Jason in for killing the Clown is to protect Batman's identity. Barbara just tries to de-escalate with her doe eyes. They're back to the status quo, and it sucks, which is the point. When they try to get back to the investigation at hand, Bruce pauses and attempts to apologize.

And again, with this blatant TKJ reference, it feels like we need to dig into the parallels between Jason and Joker! They both insist it's too late! They won't take help! But surely Jason isn't as far gone! There's something to chew on here.

But nah, this story is heading toward a big ol' revelation, foreshadowed here:

🎶 Why the fuck you lyin'? 🎶

Finally they get the alert that Joe Chill was kidnapped, and on investigating his cell, Bruce finds a bunch of letters addressed to… himself, Bruce Wayne. He seeks out the prison reverend.

Which is unintentionally hilarious, because in the storyline that started this whole three Jokers nonsense, there's a Batman Darkseid War one-shot where Joe Chill's behavior does not remotely align with this.

Lol comics are fun.

In the middle of Bruce investigating the letters, we get Jason being all repentant with Babs again.

You just said? You totally were?? Gonna kill more clowns??? How is this supposed to come off as genuine? Granted, Jason doesn't try to kill the other Jokers after this, but the apparently impetus for reversing course is... uh... we'll get there.

Anyway, among Chill's letters are tickets to the Monarch Theater, so the heroes all head over for whatever the Jokers have set up for them, which of course includes another horde of failed Joker zombies. During the fight, the Comedian's interview of Joe Chill plays on the screen, and the Criminal reveals they have Chill tied up in a chair suspended over a vat of green chemicals.

As Chill on screen explains that he killed the Waynes out of hatred and envy for how much they had, and how much he regrets his actions, the Criminal explains that he considered both Jason and Barbara as strong candidates for the new Joker. And wait. WAIT. Mr. Johns, sir, are you telling me it crossed your mind to write a story in which Barbara becomes the new Joker? That's so much more interesting than the bullshit we're getting! Imagine it: Barbara dealing with the dissatisfaction of being the "good, strong victim" and just losing her shit. You could combine that with how uneasy Jason is with his similarities to Joker, and maybe Jason is the one who convinces Barbara to turn back. This is Black Label! This could've been anything! Anything!

But we've got Chill. And the Criminal goes on to say the reason he wanted to make a new Joker at all:

Are… are you? I'm pretty sure Joker is pretty well fucking defined. He's a murderer with a very dark sense of humor who is obsessed with Batman. That's been a pretty good through-line.

Also, Joker pretty clearly means a lot to Batman, as that middle panel with Jason seems intended to remind us, but the Criminal does clarify that he wants to be "everything" to him, which is why he's pulling Bruce's parents' murderer into all this. I guess I can't blame him for reaching for the stars?

Cue big fight scene. The Chill recording continues to explain his regret, and soon the theater is on fire. Batman saves Chill and knocks the Criminal unconscious. Chill thinks Batman is going to kill him, but Bruce saves him from a falling brick wall instead— before the Criminal revives and tries to set off a bomb to kill them all, maybe. There's a BOOM flag sticking out of the dynamite a few panels later, after the Comedian shows up and shoots the Criminal in the head. TWIST!

The Comedian surrenders, and after a scene with Jason picking the most awkward time to suggest he and Barbara try being a couple and Barbara looking pissed she has to tell him no, we jump to Bruce and the Comedian in the armored police car.

As a batjokes shipper, looking at these pages is weird, because they are good food for the brainworms. The Criminal wanted to engineer a Joker who meant the most to Batman, but the Comedian wanted to be that Joker. It's a weird plan, considering that Joker prefers Batman over Bruce Wayne, so he would be more likely to not want to heal Bruce's wound lest the healing lead to less Batmanning, but still. This crazy plan is all about maintaining Batman's attention.

But I can only enjoy these panels out of context, not just because I'm pretty weary of insanely elaborate plans that manage to work out, but also because there's just so much to hate in the rest of the story, especially the real twist that closes it out.

Before we get to that, though, we're thrown back into the Jason/Barbara nonsense with a very gross letter he writes to her.

"Dear Barbara, I want to make a change. But I can't do that without you. I know I've come across cold and distant…"

1) Look, love can help people heal. Barbara could be a good friend advising Jason on what might help him. She could help bring him back into the batfam fold. This letter is not that. This letter is pushing someone to be in a romantic relationship with you for the explicit purpose of getting them to heal you. That's not how love works. That's using someone as a tool. It's supposed to be sad that Barbara never sees the letter but it's good, actually. Don't put that shit on her!

2) This romance came out of freaking nowhere and now we get Jason insisting he can simply stop being Red Hood for the sake of it— but only for the sake of it, apparently! Does Jason think his worldview as Red Hood is an impediment to healing or not? This is just surface-level melodramatic nonsense. And I wish that was the point, but no. Again, the letter getting swept away is presented as sad.

3) Speaking of which, who tapes a confessional letter that exposes your vigilante identity to a door where anyone can see it? You'd slip it under the door at least. Johns couldn't figure out any other way for the letter to vanish? Get out of here with this contrived nonsense. There should've been panels of Jason rereading the letter, realizing how unhinged it is, and throwing it away himself.

4) Is the "Funtime Cleaners" guy in his purple uniform supposed to be Joker? Or representative of Joker's influence on their lives? If yes and it's him, he's a goddamn hero. If it's symbolic, what does that mean, that even when you reach out to others… elements out of your control will keep you alone? 'Cause that sure is bleak for a book allegedly about healing.

With all that done with, now we get to the big twist, the dumbest fucking part of this story, the end, the takeaway. Of course it involves more crimes against The Killing Joke, which I'm increasingly convinced no one at DC has actually read in the past thirty years.

Bruce drives up to Alaska, and we get this reveal.

Do the kids still *headdesk* nowadays? That's what I'm doing. There will be a blood stain.

1) So Bruce has known the Joker's identity, or at least the Comedian's, basically the whole time. We're just retconning that the Joker question he asked the Magic Chair wasn't for information; it was a second test question. And all this is in the face of Bruce lamenting many times over the years that he doesn't know who Joker really is, of him lamenting it in The Killing goddamn Joke. "I don't know him, Alfred. All these years and I don't know who he is any more than he knows who I am. How can two people hate so much without knowing each other?" We're just. Fucking excising that. A line alluding to Bruce's motivation for visiting Joker in TKJ's opening scene.

2) We're rounding out the lazy revisions to the TKJ backstory with some copaganda! Geoff Johns doesn't think it's possible for Joker to have been anything but a horror to his family, but he does think it's possible that random officers in the friggin' Gotham City Police Department— in early Batman lore no less, when they were at their most corrupt— would fundraise for a "lady" they clearly don't know to get her out of the city to safety. Also, what was the plan for when Joker asked to see his wife's dead body?? Congrats, you've come up with something dumber than "Pushback."

3) This scrawls more highlighter on how bad the premise of there being three Jokers is, because the flashback in TKJ happens before Joker starts out. Like that's how Bruce always recalls it; he didn't meet the Joker until after what happened at Ace Chemicals. So isn't Jeannie then actually the Criminal's wife? Because the Criminal is the one who behaves as Bruce remembers Joker was at the start. So is the Comedian obsessed with the Criminal's wife for some reason? Or is the Comedian actually the first Joker, and the Criminal came later and used to be more wacky? What is going on here?

Under all these questions, per the final page, the point of Three Jokers is still visible: ultimately, his victims matter more than he does. But that's a hilarious point to a story that revolves around three of the guy, with very little payoff to the gimmick, and when part of the plot is that the heroes still shouldn't kill him.

And again, just because a story makes reference to healing, it doesn't mean it's "about" healing. The most we get is the knowledge that Barbara and Jeannie received support from other people. There's no discussion of how long it took either of them, of why Barbara came out the other side not wanting to kill Joker, of anything Jeannie has done since she left Gotham. The possibility that Jason could find connection is promptly throttled by a forced romance. It's implied that the Comedian's plan worked for Bruce, as we see Bruce at Chill's deathbed, holding his hand, and at Chill's grave. You might be interested in Bruce's thoughts as he juxtaposes Chill's repentance against the fact that his parents are still dead, so you can assess if this really would affect the feeling of loss that drove him to his lifelong mission, but you won't get them. The "how" of healing is up to the reader— who is never asked to extend the same thought process to the Joker. And you personally do not have to give a crap about Joker, but again, if this book is supposed to be about responses to healing, about Jason's response versus Barbara's, then taking an actual look at Joker feels relevant!

So there we are: fourteen pages of me venting my little heart out, hoping the premise of Three Jokers never gets looped into canon. I'm well aware that my personal attachment to a character means nothing against DC's incentives to promote stories with Big Twists (and endless events and multiverse bullshit), but then again, those incentives are based on what people will buy. So if I can add to the voices saying that Three Jokers is bad, and you should not spend your money on it or books like it, maybe I can be one vibe of many that keeps the Joker as one single bat-obsessed murderclown...

Though if not, I can always retreat to older comics. I still have plenty of those to get through.

[markantonys]

You know, considering the show only fans' reaction to the Seanchean, if they do put Mat and Tuon together, they're gonna have to give her and them a LOT and I mean A LOT of character development. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if Tuon shows up already with thoughts and doubts about slavery. Cause there's simply no way people are gonna be okay with it.

yeah i really do not envy them having to figure out what to do here, because EVERYTHING about mat/tuon and about tuon as a character is a giant landmine. (even just with casting, because the Head Slaver being a black woman is 🥴 especially if we then get scenes of her having to be told by a white man that slavery is bad. but if you DON'T cast a black actor as tuon then you've whitewashed a book-canonically black character. tuon's character design is the kinda thing where rj was trying to go for a ~boundary-breaking role reversal~ but it just really isn't a good look, and i don't envy the show having to deal with his choices there.)

anyway, i'm really hoping for tuon to be introduced at least a season or two before she meets mat so that she can have some development before they even cross paths, let alone begin having romance. (similar to how elayne, aviendha, and min were all developed through non-rand characters this season, which was a great choice.) one idea i'm quite fond of* is tuon showing up in nynaeve and elayne's storyline in s3 in an egeanin-esque role (tho not exactly equivalent ofc given tuon's and egeanin's differences in status/life situation/etc), so then she unknowingly befriends and comes to respect 2 ~marath'damane~, thus she has to start rethinking some things about seanchan culture when she finds out her new buddies can channel. and in s4 maybe she can have some kind of invented plotline to keep her development moving along, and s5 might be the time for her to first meet mat, and they can spend seasons 6 AND 7 together with the romance being a very slow burn. if the show just has tuon show up in ebou dar straightaway with the initial invasion rather than in a second wave after mat's storyline's been left out of an entire book, then she can meet mat sooner and they can leave sooner and have more time to spend together.

rj could have pulled off mat/tuon if he'd introduced her way sooner and had left enough time for their relationship to develop naturally and for HER to develop naturally, rather than breaking mat's characterization to cram him into a rushed relationship it makes no sense for him to want to be part of at this point in time. in WH it really does feel like rj was planning a whole meaty character development arc for tuon, but then realized between books that he wasn't gonna have enough time for it in the main series and came up with the idea of the outriggers spinoff, and in COT suddenly we have tuon being a completely static character and mat replaced by a pod person who's obsessed with her and has completely changed his views on slavery.

but the show has the benefit of knowing the endpoint already, so hopefully they're already planning for how to make the mat/tuon romance feel more believable. i think the only 2 options are a) introduce tuon way earlier and give her a proper redemption arc, or b) make it a political marriage which mat is putting up with for the greater good but has 0 romantic interest in tuon. because yeah, mat falling in love with an unrepentant slaver would make him absolutely vile in the eyes of all viewers, especially after how hard the show went on showing the vileness of the seanchan in s2. show viewers will not have forgotten the torture egwene suffered by the time mat meets tuon as easily as so many book readers apparently did.

*i'm also very fond of the idea of tuon being introduced in seanchan proper because i spent the whole series expecting us to see seanchan proper and the court of the 9 moons etc and felt SO robbed that we never did, so i'd loooooove if the show took us there and had tuon leading a plotline there before she leaves for the westlands. but purely in terms of getting her to start rethinking the damane system early on, this scenario wouldn't be as useful as the one of her meeting nynaeve and elayne in the westlands.

and finally, it's very interesting that they killed off every single notable seanchan character from s2. this could mean that they didn't want to leave any loose ends because the seanchan will be entirely absent for the next season or two, ooooooooooooor it could mean that they wanted to clear the stage for tuon to step up as our major seanchan character in the next season or two.

[bookaddict24-7]

REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

Every week I will post various reviews I've written so far in 2024. You can check out my Goodreads for more up-to-date reviews HERE.

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241. The Discovery by Katherine Applegate--⭐️⭐️⭐️

That poor snake.

I feel torn about this one because while in theory, it was a good addition to the series, something about how the characters were at the end of the book when they had to make a big decision sat wrong with me. Maybe it's because I've been spoiled by their easy decision making, or their teamwork when it comes to important decisions.

BUT then again, I know that these are just kids and they've been thrown into a deadly and near-impossible situation.

I do think it's a very convenient storyline to push through the next couple of books and to teach our Animorphs team a very important lesson about trust and the dangers of war.

In a way, THE DISCOVERY is a sad one. Yes, the poor snake, but it's sad to see the beginning of the end of a type of trust for these kids. And the levels that some people will go in order to survive or deal with their grief.

___

242. Sing Anyway by Anita Kelly--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Okay, this was adorable AF.

I wasn't expecting to love this novella so much, but yes! It was adorable and the tension between the two MCs was palpable. I love that this takes place, for the most part, during one night of bravery since the one MC is incredibly shy and socially anxious.

I loved that even though this is a novella, we had a beautifully fleshed out story of two strangers letting down their insecurities for one night in order to connect. Even though we get hints of said insecurities, they both know the importance of letting themselves love every moment of their night.

My only iffy moment was the main conflict and how easy it could have been to avoid it, but I also understand the fear of something new, especially when you have presented yourself in a certain way instead of who you regularly are. But the ending was cute af and I like that the one character did the work and the other was pleasantly surprised. It was all so satisfying.

If you're looking for a seriously cute and sexy Queer novella, then I think you should 100% add this to your TBR.

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243. The 7-10 Split by Karmen Lee--⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was cute, but something about it didn't have me hooked enough to keep me from putting it down often. I did love the rep and was intrigued by the bowling!

I picked this up for a twenty-four hour readathon and while I was hoping it would be a quick read since it's not exactly long, but every time I picked it up it felt like I was swimming uphill. The story itself was fun and cute, with a really unique concept--the bowling was something I haven't seen in a romance novel before--but something about the writing made it feel so bogged down. If it wasn't for me wanting to finish this for a challenge, I might have taken longer reading this or even abandoned it.

I did like the second chance trope and the fact that the one MC essentially had to win back the trust of the other MC. The tension between the two of them was pretty good and it got pretty steamy in some instances. I liked the side characters and how they interacted with the MCs. I do wish we had gotten some poetic justice against the principal. What a dick.

Anyway, this isn't the first teacher sapphic romance I've read, but it IS the first one that just didn't immediately grab me. Oh well, at least the story was still fun?

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244. Pumpkin by Julie Murphy--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Immediately HOOKED!

Okay, I had forgotten how freaking cute these books were, or how well written they were! I loved Pumpkin and his personality. One of the things, I think, that's important when reading this book is to remember that the MC is a teenager. There are high emotions in here, as well as a journey to discovering who the MC is, even if it means being angry with his twin sister.

Also, please, I knew who the love interest would be from the very beginning because it would have been a crime otherwise. These two work so well together, especially because it teaches the MC to not judge others by his prejudices.

The process of how the MC finds what he likes was great and eye-opening. Drag has always been this concept that feels so much bigger than life and I think Murphy wrote a great story of a teen boy finding something that makes him feel whole and happy.

PUMPKIN also tackles that difficult concept of change--especially for teenagers because change can feel like the end of the world for some. Sometimes change can be difficult, but PUMPKIN shows that it's often necessary for growth, even if it makes a person uncomfortable or upset. AND with that concept of "change", comes the other concept of "figuring out what the hell you want to do with your life". It's okay to follow your own path, even if it doesn't look like everyone else's.

Being different is okay and being yourself is beautiful!

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245. Princess Academy by Shannon Hale--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

This was cute, but I definitely liked THE GOOSE GIRL more!

PRINCESS ACADEMY had that similar way of writing that THE GOOSE GIRL had and that made me really excited. Something about Hale's fantasy writing feels so easy, but in the best way. Her stories flow so well and have a way of capturing my attention. Maybe it's the straightforward way of writing the situations, or if it's the personable MCs, but I love these fantasy stories.

I liked the MC in this one because she was pretty dimensional. She wasn't just a girl who was fighting for the attention of a prince, she was someone who acknowledged that she had a past before going to the academy. She was also kind and empathetic, but also rebellious in her own way. I loved her connection to her small village and the magic that can be found in that connection.

I also loved how Hale handled the prince situation and the ending. I kind of saw it coming, but it also still surprised me. Also, the level of trust and friendship that grows between the girls throughout the book was great. I think it's a great thing for younger readers to read so they know that even in the most difficult of situations, you can still make unexpected friendships.

I'd recommend this for anyone who loves the classics like A LITTLE PRINCESS, since this has that magical feeling of friendship, family, and an MC who refuses to let go of her caring personality.

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246. Shut Up You're Pretty by Téa Mutonji--⭐️⭐️⭐️

When I first finished SHUT UP YOU'RE PRETTY, I was in a haze trying to come to terms with what I had read. On one hand, there were some pretty powerful moments where the MC realizes her worth and who she is as a person. On the other hand, however, this book just made me so incredibly uncomfortable. And as I finally write this review, I'm left with that icky feeling of discomfort.

I do, however, think it's important to acknowledge the great representation of that toxic friendship that verges on one's own sexual discovery. We never see into the best friend's mind during these sexually explicit times in their childhoods (ugh), but in their actions together we see two girls who are both seemingly escaping from either abusive lives and or that feeling of inequality that comes from being the "ugly" friend of a duo. That part hit me extra hard since my teen years and a good chunk of my twenties was full of me repressing my sexuality and being best friends with the "prettier white girl". It was a cycle that was hard to break and seeing the MC being pulled back in a few times until we never hear about the best friend again was lowkey triggering.

And we see how this lingers with the MC as she goes through an eating-disorder, body-issues, and a lack of self-appreciation in some of her relationships. The title is apt because this girl was verbally abused about her looks from a young age and despite her "physical change" as an adult, that young girl who was told she was ugly still lingers with her throughout her adulthood.

The lower rating was for the incredibly creepy things these two best friends did when they were younger and how it was described. The rest of the short stories were pretty powerful and a great exploration of how childhood trauma and grief can really change the trajectory of a life and how a person ends up seeing themselves and their worth for the rest of their lives.

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247. Land of No Regrets by Sadi Muktadir--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I love stories like LAND OF NO REGRETS because it explores the coming-of-age side of boyhood. The silly pranks, the moments of self-discovery, the naive perceptions of the world around them, and that hope that there has to be more/an escape from their current lives.

Muktadir's book was, of course, a harder to read version of that coming-of-age trope because these boys dealt with some serious abuse in this school. It showed the extremity of some branches of religion and how some parents will do anything to ensure that their children end up the way they want them to (without considering the fact that these children have their own autonomies). As a result, this was a great and tragic fable of a childhood stolen by parents' inability to understand that children are not extensions of themselves (among other things).

I really enjoyed the way LAND OF NO REGRETS was presented. It felt episodic and like we were being shown the most important points leading to that hell of a conclusion. We have the misadventures and the different people the characters meet. We see alliances form, and identities be challenged. They weren't short stories, but they were like snippets of a young life lived in a toxic and abusive environment.

And while religion is definitely an important topic in this book, I think this was more about the extremist side of religion and we hella know that all religions have their extreme nature. I liked that the MC still found his voice and questioned all that he could.

LAND OF NO REGRETS was poignant, powerful, and a bittersweet exploration of boyhood and the consequences of over-the-top expectations and what could happen when control becomes a weapon and self-expression/moral freedom is put into question.

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248. Napkins & Other Distractions by M.A. Wardell--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️.5

Honestly, this author never misses. Wardell knows what he's doing and in this one, he doesn't hold anything back.

NAPKINS & OTHER DISTRACTIONS was such a sweet addition to this series. I think these characters are the oldest I've read in romance and it was great seeing them get their happy ever afters! This also introduced a sexual concept to me that I didn't even know existed, so that was eye-opening.

I loved the character dynamics and how they were each others' safe place, even when they felt those moments of insecurity. The representation of OCD was interesting and I feel like I learned a lot about the topic (I didn't know a lot more than the stereotypical information beforehand). I found the older MC so sweet in his treatment of his love interest. Let's not even forget to mention the level of respect between these two characters!

AND OF COURSE, that SPICE. Holy crap, this was a spicy one. I loved it, but it had even me blushing a bit. These two have a very healthy and active sexual connection and PHEW. Please. Excuse me, I need to get a glass of water.

My one negative might be the conflict and how it was handled (even if it was brief), but I DID love how it was resolved. I just think that for a couple that communicates so well, a part of the conflict was a bit of communication.

Other than that, I loved this book like I did the other two in this series! I am craving a re-read, but I don't know when it will happen because it's almost that time of the year when all I want to read are horror books…

Anyway, LOVED and highly recommend this series to everyone who loves beautiful relationships, spicy chemistry, and the cutest couples around.

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249. Delinquent Daddy & Sweet Teacher Vol. 4 by Tama Mizuki--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Devoured, as always.

I love this series so much and I'm so happy we got a new volume! In this one explores insecurities that can sometimes come up in relationships we think we don't deserve. I liked how these two characters worked through that and communicated, while also moving forward in their relationship.

There isn't much I can't say because of spoilers and it's further into the series, but this was just as cute as before. Even as things start to change and get a bit more serious when their secret relationship moves that forward step into maybe not being as secret.

I'm excited to see what's next for this couple! I'm loving their growth, not just as a couple but their independent growth as characters.

___

Have you read any of these books? What were your thoughts?

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Happy reading!

[battle-of-mid]

iwould like to hear your rant about lmk wukong's character assassination. In detail. if possible. please

(takes long drag of cigarette) it really did all start with the show itself coming out. see, after ROTTMNT came out, i don't think we could really expect flying bark to be "faithful" to its IPs and while whether that was a good thing for the TMNT franchise is absolutely something that can be discussed by people that aren't me, it's a whole lot more sensitive when you're handling a show based on a cultural treasure -

LEGO's line of toys dedicated to a sort of journey of the west spinoff is, in my opinion, an objectively good idea. other than boosting sales it feels kind of inevitable considering just how much LNY stuff they'd put out already, you know? to put it simply i don't have any problems with the lego monkie kid IP in concept, just with the way FB decided to run with its execution -- which ended up landing it squarely in "hot mess" territory.

basically - and i promise that this is relevant to wukong specifically, bear with me - i think that the first red flags were the fixation on their rendition of the six-eared macaque: a character that they've changed from being a single-use "evil twin" character that served the original Journey to the West's allegory for enlightenment (ie. that he was a manifestation of SWK's worst impulses) and then immediately fucking died when the situation called for it. he didn't show up for more than one storyline. they retcon a looooot of SWK's actual backstory as detailed by the book itself in order to make room for sadboy LEMH content so the writers could get their shipfix for him and SWK (which is annoying on more than one point, if you remember what I said about the evil twin thing. if you catch my drift. average flying bark moment)

but to put it simply i genuinely think they just made him... way too much of a lazy fucking self absorbed asshole? the beginning of the show has this which feels like a one-off gag but they double down on it later which makes they didn't write sun wukong -- this is after he's supposed to have ascended to victorious-in-strife buddha, mind you, and it ends up feeling less like sun wukong at any point in the storyline and more like... well, goku. from dragon ball super. which is its own, mostly unrelated can of worms in and of itself.

the thing is this is a character that's been used historically as an allegory, as representative of the people, objectively a cultural icon no matter where in china-influenced asia you find yourself (fantastic analysis of the problem with the way LMK pays homage to that allegory here), and also used in reference to, like, diaspora kids. this is a character that baaasically any chinese person with any kind of connection to the culture is going to see themselves in - especially in his reckless identity and subsequent ascension, you know?

and the main problem here is essentially that when you do this with a character that exsits as part of a media franchise... it's fine? it's whatever. people can just skip that. but when you are doing this as an attempt to adapt a piece of historically and culturally important literature - one that is made for children, one that is infinitely more accessible to diaspora children of that culture than any other adaptation that would be directed towards their age demographic, it feels like a punch in the gut. it's a level of disrespect that just really really hurts, all because the people in charge of it feel like they have to flanderize their characters for their fandom or they'll, like, die.

this isn't exactly organized nor is it every thought i have on the matter but basically tldr they forgot they were writing sun wukong and not their oc

[ravensvirginity]

I won't lie, even as an atheist i am always completely confused by antisemitism in superhero fandoms. We most definetly wouldn't have modern superhero media without jewish men, while they were not perfect (it was the 40s-60s afterall, alot of stuff related to women and characters of color didn't age greatly), these days they make so much of modern pop-culture...it'd propably help if the movies (mainly Marvel) would stop ignoring characters jewish identity (Fantastic Four and X-men movies by Fox), toning them down as much as possible (Moon Knight) or christian-washing them (Scarlet Witch).

yeah, Jewish men literally made the comic book industry but of course their legacy hasn't really been honored. Modern comics in general are so soulless and any Jewish rep is there just to tick a box, at least in my opinion. Like in the Teen Titans Christmas special this year when they had a shot of the Tower decked out in Christmas decorations and then they had 2 tiny Hanukkah banners there just for no reason. Like why are they there?? As far as the comic presents, none of the Titans are Jewish, and the decorations didn't feel like a real Hanukkah decoration at all. It was just a diversity tick with no thought put into it.

I definitely agree that I wish comics would stop ignoring Jewish identity, and it would be great if there were just more Jewish characters in general. And if they do a Hanukkah special or whatever it would be awesome if they hired someone Jewish to write it.

Raven I think is an interesting example of comics being created by Jews - Marv Wolfman is Jewish, and though Raven is primarily Indian coded (mostly in an 80s cultural appropriation way, but I digress) she's also got some things about her that feel Jewish. Arella is an unconventional spelling of a Jewish name (Erela) and Rachel Roth (tho Wolfman isn't the one who gave her that name) is incredibly Jewish.

In the 80s comics Wolfman wrote, Arella's religion before coming to Azarath is unclear. Her birth name isn't Arella, but we don't know what it is beyond that. Raven is a character with a very strong conviction in her fictional, but very non Christian religion. In a way, she's both an antichrist and a Christ allegory (she dies for Trigon's sins, and is resurrected purified of evil to destroy him). She's just a mix of so many different things, and while I do think some of it could be more ironed out (like making her actually Indian instead of a white woman who's very clearly been inspired by Indian culture) I think for the most part these elements work together.

20 years later, Raven gets a reboot, and much of this is gone. Arella's birth name is Angela, and it's now canon that she joined a demonic cult to escape her Christian family. Raven still has a connection to Azarath, but this gets less and less prominent and in the current run, it's completely gone.

I think that even though the cult of Azar is not a real religion, so it's not like anyone was being represented by it, it's very frustrating that they got rid of it in favor of making Raven vaguely culturally Christian (and even outright Christian in the 2018 live action show). Christian homogeny comes for literally everything, even this comic book character's fictional religion that was once a central part of her character.

The weirdest part is Marv Wolfman's modern Raven solos only further reinforce her new Christian backstory, having her stay with her very Christian aunt's family and even having a storyline about pushing her to go to Mass on Christmas, despite him being Jewish himself. It's unclear how much of this was his own writing choices and how much was an editorial mandate, but it's weird.

This got kind of rambley but my main point is modern DC flattens out it's characters to insane degrees, and that includes things like unique religious practices, fictional and real. Everyone is just vaguely culturally Christian with no further thought given to what makes sense for the character, and any religious diversity (in the comics I have read) is almost entirely there just to tick a box with no real thought or depth put in.

[ljandersen]

whats ur status on sideways 👀? No joke i think abt it daily.

Thank you for reaching out, Anon! It means a lot to me, knowing that a story I wrote is thought about every day. I think about it every day, too, being the author! It's still the story I'm proudest to have written.

As for the status on Sideways, it currently exists as a hand-written, rough first draft stored in a fire-proof safe. It needs massive changes -- complete scene rewrites and a ton of new scenes (mostly for the paragon timeline). It's currently on my back burner while I focus on an original project.

All the adjustments I made editing the 750k words in Part 1-4 has culminated in a major undertaking editing Part 5.

For instance, the reason Shepard joins the Alliance on Rannoch is different after my changes in Part 4. Before, I didn't have a very good reason for her being there and, because of that peripheral role, she wasn't directly involved in a lot of the things happening. Now she's acting Counselor. She's front and center.

It's a good change, the right change, which is why I did it. However, now a lot of the plot-centric happenings, which were only heard about or referenced through another character, need full scenes with Shepard being impactful and altering the outcomes (much better than being a removed observer).

This will require several new scenes and throwing out old ones that are now unnecessary. Then I need to relocate any extra bits of vital information not in the new scene, to other places in the story.

In addition to whole new scenes, I need to majorily revise whole scenes. There's a party scene on Rannoch, which now the goal behind it and what Shepard is doing during it, has changed. That series of scenes need rewritten.

That example of Shep's purpose on Rannoch changing scenes downstream is just one -- and a mostly spoiler free one -- of the dozens of changes I need to accomodate.

Also, the paragon timeline in particular requires a lot of new writing, maybe 50 k words of new scenes (so, the equivalent of a full novel).

Toward the end of writing the first draft of Sideways, I was starting to get worn down. Writing four storylines sometimes made it feel like I was spending weeks going nowhere, because I wasn't moving forward in the main Renegade timeline. Because of that frustration and wanting to reach the end, I chose to focus less on the paragon timeline, knowing I would need to add more to it during the editing. I left myself with some major work to do on that storyline to do it justice.

All of those reasons aside, the main reason Sideways Part 5 isn't ready is because I shifted focus for the time being. I'm serializing an original sci fi series and trying to establish myself an author. I intended to do this after I finished posting Sideways, but with the emergence of AI, I don't think the opportunity will be there for me if I wait.

Visibility for writing is going to become impossible and slow human writers, like me, will be washed away under the tide of AI mega production. There's an influential author in the indie world, for example, who has stated his intention to produce 10k novels a year, on par with the big publishing houses. That's one person, who with a handful of contractors previously put out a few dozen books a year, if that many, who now intends to do 10k a year!

My opportunity to find readers is now, while AI is still clunky and not universal, before people selling a back catalog of 100k books and with the ad spending to match drive human writers out of the market.

Because of this new priority, I've had to funnel my creativity and focus into my original writing. I'm not someone who can do two things at once. I'm all in on one project at a time. That's probably apparent from my fanfic, where I've only posted one WIP at a time, start to finish before the next. I can't divide my passion on concurrent WIP.

That doesn't mean I don't think about Sideways though -- I do, daily! -- and I intend to finish it. For now, though, unfortunately, Sideways is a draft in some notebooks in a safe. It's not a simple undertaking to edit it, and I need to focus on a personal goal.

Your interest in Sideways is something I treasure, though, and appreciate beyond words. I'm so glad my story isn't forgotten. I love knowing it's still on readers' minds. It makes me feel like, what had so much meaning to me as its writer, truly must carry that meaning through to the reader, too, which is the greatest joy in sharing a story.

Thank you for taking time to check in on Sideways and for letting me know how much it still means to you.

Also, here is a picture of my new puppy as a tiny consolation for not having Sideways ready:

[zahri-melitor]

Newish Comics:

The Flash #7: The Linear Men? The Linear Men??? Si Spurrier, what is cooking in your brain and can you keep giving me a direct line to it? (I mean bringing the Linear Men in a series that also gave us Gold Beetle makes perfect sense because Rip would be so into her but wow. It looks like they've barely been used since Flashpoint too). Also it's fascinating watching the re-establishment of Max and Bart's relationship.

Barry seems to finally have risen out of his ennui a bit, only to notice Something Is Wrong With Linda and then immediately suspect (wrongly) it's Hartley. Still pretty sure Linda's main issue is PPD but it being imposed by an external source is certainly something.

Green Arrow #10: this is another issue that mostly exists for people to hug each other, while Williamson goes 'remember that these people had relationships?' Sean Izaakse's art is just so good in terms of drawing the memory backgrounds so well I can pick out the specific issues and storylines he used as references (Batman + Arsenal shoutout!)

Also, remember when Amanda Waller didn't put bombs in people's heads, she just very occasionally put explosive collars or wristbands on the most dangerous and/or irritating Suicide Squad members? (Like Captain Boomerang?) Because I do. I remember Suicide Squad 1987.

Batman: The Brave and the Bold #11: part of this is me just being contrary, I know, but I am extremely not convinced we are going to see Maps as an active Robin in a main title, given Kerschl is a Gotham Academy creator anyway, and she's currently getting appearances as Meridian over in Birds of Prey. Gotham Academy continuity is only about 1/4 linked to main book continuity. (Someone is going to try and point out 'they appeared in Robin War' or something but it was an active and new title then, and honestly, nobody writing most Bat titles cares about them. It's its own sub universe. Also this story has Bruce dating Isla MacPherson, something I guarantee will not be followed up anywhere else)

Also imagine being called Karl Kerschl and coming to DC to write? How much time does this poor man spend saying "no, not Kesel".

The Artemis story remains amazing and I am fully supportive of it retconning whatever character crimes it is currently trying to excuse as weird.

Also how did we get so unlucky as to have both a Bat Lash AND a Sgt Rock story in this issue?

Amazons Attack #6: and this tied things off nicely! Honestly for an event that didn't need to happen, Josie Campbell did well with it, featured a whole host of Wonder Woman characters that Tom King's barely interacting with, and added to some relationships between characters that needed additional work.

Alan Scott: The Green Lantern #5: I am sure this is a far more meaningful issue if you care deeply about Green Lantern lore. Also DELIGHTED that the JSA team up in this series actually happens on page rather than in the final splash like in Wesley Dodds: The Sandman. (Wesley Dodds is still the best of the three minis to me, but I'm happy here that we're going to get JSA backup).

The Warlord #45: Previously on Lost World of the Warlord (I said I would) Travis set out to find out what had happened to his daughter Jennifer. He goes back to the village of dwarfs and gets his old sword back (since he chucked Hellfire into a lake), and ends up fighting some Cyclops' that took several of the dwarves to eat. Tragically nothing particularly fun happens here (though a skeleton IS tied to a cross, the bondage isn't involving any characters I care about AND it's just a warning threat)

Also something weird went on with the lettering this issue where what I think were script directions ended up as text boxes for all the scene transitions. If it was a stylistic choice on Grell's part it's a particularly odd one.

[dreamydadie]

since tmf ep 10 has been released and everyone is crying, i'm still clinging to the small, unlikely chance that my girl is getting a good role on part 2

and no, i don't mean “give her a good role” as in another obstacle for zander and luke's relationship. stacy haters go away!!

stacy barely had 2 minutes of screentime and we barely know anything about her!! not what her interests are or what her personality is like besides having a crush on luke. she isn't even seen after the classroom scene happened... elliot has less screentime than her but we still know what his interest is (gardening) and some bits of his backstory from milly's redemption glmv. maybe it's because he's shipped with one of the main cast but give my girl a break 💔

rosy's a champion for how much work she put into animating and hyping all that up but admittedly, the writing is lacking sometimes. like luke's character outside of lander and obviously stacy's character in general. it's like she just got ignored after lander became canon.

no, actually, since mariah also doesn't seem to have an actual role besides being zoey's friend, you could just replace her with stacy and then the storyline would mostly still stay the same except stacy would at least get more personality.

stacy being zoey's friend has so much potential. stacy gushing about how much she loves luke to zoey with the latter being annoyed by it and then when stacy finds out luke and zander are dating, she cries about to her and it gives zoey a more slightly reasonable reason to hate the music club and show that she isn't so much of a brat like everyone thought. not that i think they're both homophobic, zoey would just be like “how dare he, anybody would be lucky to date my friend!” or something something.

or since zoey is a villain we're all supposed to hate, maybe make stacy an actual one too like how some of the fandom perceives her to be? i don't like stacy hate but at least it would give a valid reason for some to actually hate her character (instead of the stupid “she gets in the way of my ship” excuse) and it's more stacy screentime so i don't mind. maybe stacy scolds zoey when she bullies the music club in front of luke, but the moment luke isn't around, she lets her do whatever she wants.

or if you wanna go on a shipping route because the fandom loves ships, they could be like henriam with so many shippy moments but don't realize they're an actual couple now until someone points it out. maybe they go shopping together and zoey's shopaholic ass buys her so many pretty dresses while stacy is grateful for it. maybe zoey carries a share of stacy's books because she knows she can be a bit of a klutz.

platonically or romantically, stoey would have an interesting dynamic if they actually, y'know, interacted. stacy's character herself would be so interesting if she actually got developed! even if it's super unlikely...

rosy please give my girl screentime i don't care if it's for five seconds just please just give her a role that isn't being an obstacle for lander or one that's just nonexistent please rosypleaseitsalliwantforchristmas–

[witheredoffherwitch]

Yeah I agree with the last anon. I definitely don’t think all stories should be catered to us but it is kind of laughable to see the amount of unfiltered misogynistic discourse directed towards her and people consuming these stories always rooting for her to die so that him and the wattpad-esque OC can end up together. It’s definitely a trend and as the anon said, very much eye-roll worthy and unoriginal. It’s fine if people want to practice their writing skills ofc but a huge part of being a writer is being able to accept criticism and feedback related to the sort of the themes and tropes we use in stories. I think this is oftentimes conflated with “hate” and that’s just not the case. The “evil witch” trope has been around since fairytales existed and I get why people find it lazy because it inherently is.

Hi nonnie, hope you're doing well.

I do not condone this point of view. Every fanfic writer is allowed to create and narrate their own rendition of these stories however they wish. I believe shaming or even 'taunting' these authors is the worst course of action here. In fact, constantly questioning these genres/tropes can sometimes bring them into the spotlight - Lucemond and Jonsa are two great examples! I personally read stories filtered under both of these tags and have met with a great deal of pushback from other shippers for liking or even promoting these stories on my page. Fanfic writers put in a great deal of time and energy into writing these stories for free, without seeking any financial gain from their readership. Therefore, there is no significant loss for a reader who may dislike a story. While art is certainly open to criticism and interpretation, it's different from critiquing a more financially incentivized book or film aimed at a wider audience.

Secondly, I understand why you feel so exasperated - it is disheartening to witness the frequent rejection of Alys' character. I'm more sympathetic to those who view her as a victim in this dynamic - something of a 'war trophy' for Aemond. What really irritates me is how some downplay Aemond's power in the relationship, making him out to be a victim. If Ewan's portrayal hadn't gotten so much traction, I don't think many people would have even noticed Alys' role in his storyline - or perhaps they'd be applauding her for 'bewitching' him and ultimately sending him to his death.

That being said, I don't think fanfictions are the main issue here. Do people make Alys into an evil temptress and diminish her role as the other woman? Yes! However, we have yet to see her appear onscreen and we're still unaware of what direction the show will go in. With recent rumors that Nettles and Daeron may not make an appearance (which I'm desperately hoping isn't true), many Alysmond shippers are now concerned that Alys will be given the original arc between Nettles/Daemon before Aemond enters the picture. If this is the case, how fucking disappointing! As an Alysmond shipper, these fanfictions are the least of my worries. Other fanfic writers will keep crafting content for these two in the future - I'm positive of that.

I still believe (hope?) that Alys' character will gain popularity when she's introduced in the show but until then, it's best to maintain a healthy dose of caution when discussing them.

That's all 🤗

[phantomss-pain]

I have to know what's your opinion on the silver eyes as a whole?

(Also do you have any headcannons for why Michael just doesn't exist there? (I don't know why but I always find people's reasoning for why he isn't mentioned once funny))

I’m guessing when you talk about silver eyes as a whole you mean the entire trilogy so I’ll just go over each of the stuff there and explain my headcanon for why Michael isn’t there.

Silver eyes book:

Second favourite thing in fnaf in general behind fnaf 2. I love Charlie and her whole storyline. I love most of the characters (Lamar doesn’t count). The fact that it’s such a character driven story is amazing and there are so many scenes where I’m just like this is amazing. William’s reveal, Sammy death scene as well. All of it was perfect. I know a lot of people complain about the pacing but I don’t care. The fact it takes its time is great as it build up everything to the finale very well.

Twisted ones:

I also really like this book. I know people say it’s boring but I disagree. I like Charlie’s whole crisis with Sammy and Henry as I think that makes sense after what happened to her in silver eyes. I like Jessica and Clay here with the two basically being there to say hey Charlie you okay there? I guess the main problem is just the stuff with John as it feels like filler however I do think it adds to Charlie’s current crisis. Buttttt then there is the ending which sets up Forth Closet.

Forth closet:

This book is where the silver eyes trilogy goes off the deep end and I say is the main reason the current lord is a god damn cluster fuck. To give some positives out there I do think John and Jessica being the main characters here work and I like that. The first two chapters are also pretty solid. But then everything just goes down the fucking drain and it’s all because of that god damn twist. Charlie being a robot is so fucking shit. It takes away from her character as she isn’t even her own person she is just Henry’s agony or something like that. It also doesn’t help the fact that the robot kid twist could have worked IF FUCKING SAMMY WAS THE ROBOT KID.

Like imagine if the main plot of Forth Closet is Charlie bonding with this version of Sammy finally thinking that she has someone from her family to bond with only for that to be ripped away as she finally lets go of Sammy and Henry for good. Like the plot of Forth Closet wouldn’t change that much except Charlie can still be a character and have a arc where she has to put down this version of Sammy that has been possessed by Evan or Elizabeth.

Forth Closet makes me angry the same way Security Breach and ruin does lmao.

Charlie:

Charlie in silver eyes is hands down my favourite fnaf character. It’s the main interpretation I look towards when writing for Charlie. I like her helpful shyish nature while being a cool tomboy on the side. Now I think I made it clear I don’t like forth closet’s reveal and I’ll leave it at that.

John:

I think John does get a bad rap in the fandom I think part of that is due to how the fandom doesn’t really like straight ships which I’m not going to get into and trust me I don’t mean it as a diss towards gay ships in this fandom but god fucking can we please stop using Jessica and Charlie to shit on John and Charlie please for the love of god. Anyway John um. I like him. He’s at his worst in twisted ones but he does improve in Forth Closet so that’s cool. (Also I’m really sorry that John basically turned into a slight fandom rant but I really needed to get that off my chest)

Jessica:

I have a love hate relationship with Jessica mostly due to people insisting that Jessica would have been so much better as a love interest for Charlie and using that to shit on John. Which I’m being real that did turn me off Jessica and Charlie as a ship until recently (but my love for the ship went down as saw those takes pop up again and just urg). Anyway I love her personality and I love the fact that she is Charlie’s right hand lady basically. Like can we just get more fics where instead of Charlie being friends with the mci kids and Elizabeth we get more fics where it’s Charlie’s actual friend group in the books and have Jessica and Charlie be the close ones instead of Elizabeth and Charlie?

Carlton:

Funny man. I like his whole thing in silver eyes and is just really funny like I said.

Marla:

I’ve really opened up to Marla recently (part of that is because I am writing a fic with her and Elizabeth together with a friend) I just like her mama bear personality. She’s sweat and needs to be used more.

Clay, Aunt Jen:

Both characters need to be used more full stop. Can we have more fics with Jen talking to Henry or have Clay be the one investigating Freddy’s please. Just give them more attention I beg

Michael headcanons:

My person headcanon is just after Charlie died Mrs Afton just divorced William and in their agreement took Michael and Evan. I think he’s just out there maybe with a girlfriend or a boyfriend just having fun not knowing anything about what William is doing.

[autumnslance]

I have a question about carrying out an idea. I think this writing issue I've been having has been plaguing me longer than my time on Mateus; I’ve always struggled to get past chapter one or even stick to an idea, even when I started writing years ago. Are there any pointers on carrying an idea or story through?

That's a hard one, as I know I have plenty of plans and WIPs I haven't gotten past those stages myself.

So I ask myself what's the core of the idea, the heart of it? What is it I really want to say? I don't tend to write chronologically myself; I write lines, descriptions, bits of dialogue, scenes, and chapters entirely out of order. I know where they "go" in the overall arc. And sometimes, like with the Avengret storyline, I can then string them together, shuffling the order, writing new bridging scenes, removing or combining others as needed.

If I am trying to write in order, even then if a section is hard, or boring, or not working--skip it. Put in some brackets with [AND THEN X AND Y HAPPENS AND IT'S NOW THE NEXT DAY]. Move on to the next part that excites you, or that you at least know what happens. You can always double back later and add in that connecting scene...or even decide it isn't needed now, you've covered everything it would have elsewhere, and can just be summarized and moved on from.

I've recently been reading a "How To Write" series of books by James Scott Bell; there are several, but they're all pretty short. One of the pieces of advice he gives is to start in the middle (go to the midpoint of just about any novel or film, and it's somewhere very near that 50% mark in one direction or another). Find the "mirror moment" a point--sometimes a page or paragraph, sometimes just a single line--that is a frank look at the situation, self, etc on the part of the main character. What do they see? It's a moment of reflective truth. Who is the character in this midpoint? How did they get here? Who do they need to be/what must they do to get to the end? How do they realize they may fail? What forces are against them? Do they realize/acknowledge any of this?

These are recommendations more for novels than short stories, but heavens know how long some of our fics go, and short stories do still have similar, if truncated, structures and beats.

Anyway, you're not beholden to write from beginning to end. You may not know everything about your story yet--because you haven't written it yet, and these things change form, even for plotters with outlines. Write scenes. Write chapters. Write microfics that are just a couple lines of dialogue. Use prompt lists and challenges, if you gotta. Start small and build, as one of the old philosophers said.

(and eventually one day you look and realize you've written a few hundred thousand words, many of them about your OC and a Damn Rogue wending through their world...)

Writing works like exercise; you have to practice it, figure out what works for you, at what times of day, and it can be a struggle to keep up momentum. In the meanwhile, you also have to take other care of yourself.

Like actual exercise (whatever you're able to do; at least stretches, which is where I'm at some days). Remembering to eat and stay hydrated, get plenty of sleep (don't @ me, I sleep, just on a later schedule), and also do remember to intake other creative works; I got a rush of inspiration last year and spent months feverishly writing scenes and plotting and writing dialogues and making timeline outlines and writing more pages I'll never use after reading a popular novel, cuz the visceral language and a vaguely similar character dynamic in certain specific ways clicked something on in my brain. We gotta feed that persnickety little muse.

And on the days the muse is being recalcitrant...we write anyway. It's hard, it feels like it sucks, but if we want to get something done? Write something. Anything. Stream of consciousness if you gotta; complain, talk out your ideas, maybe write a little from that. And the next day look at it and realize it's not so bad as you thought and a little polish will fix it.

So don't try to be perfect first round; writing is messy. Revision and editing is where we make it look pretty (you usually don't have to rewrite entirely front to back, either; some folks like to, but for many others that's only if there's serious structure issues; mileage varies per project, too, as they're all different).

So write the scenes out of order, as they come. See what ideas stick and what are just idle thoughts. Maybe they're all true and there's multiverses and AUs there. See what starts t string together into coherence. Don't be afraid to revise, rewrite, even retcon if something better comes along months later after you already posted something.

The only way to know the story is to write it, figuring out how it wants to be written, and sometimes that means writing it from other angles and around the back way until it tells us how it got to that point (and whether what we thought was the start actually was or not).

Anyway. This got long, hopefully there's some tiny tidbit that helps!

[ishgardenjoyer]

It's so funny to me to see all this slander and hate on Roman. You all really act like the guy books himself and makes these decisions. It's easy for people to point the finger at him and make him the bad guy when the ones who need to have the finger pointed at them are the people running the damn company. Where's the accountability towards Nick Khan and Triple H? Why don't people hold them accountable the same they did Vince when he was running things? I think people who are upset about last night are just being hypocrites, because if it were anyone other than Roman, no one would bat an eye. They'd be happy for their fave too. Heels cheat to win all the time, but because it's Roman who does it, it's a whole different story.

And sorry to burst your bubble, but AEW isn't any better by a long shot and I'm tired of people pretending it is. I'm tired of the fucking cancer, terminal disease, and toxic poison that is JAS, who do nothing but steal other people's spotlights and take away from those who actually deserve and contribute nothing whatsoever to the show. They can fucking choke for all I care. I'd rather have a whole show revolve around the Bloodline, who at least help elevate those around them and give us compelling stories. Oh, and at least they're good people IRL, unlike certain members of JAS.

At this point, I'm convinced this is all just racially motivated and racism against Roman. If Roman were a white man, the whole narrative would be different.

Oh no my first anon hate :)

First of all, this is absolutely a Triple H problem. I even said, I love Roman Reigns, it's just that this run's gone stale. Through no part of his own, of course. I said WWE torched their golden goose. I said I love Roman, but this is a bad booking decision. If you had any reading comprehension, you'd know I was talking about... how did that one guy put it? Oh yeah, Vince's doofus son in law and the rest of his stupid family.

Secondly, I don't know what this JAS shit is about. Anyone who watches AEW will tell you that JAS is a garbage faction outside of Daniel Garcia. Trust me, most of us don't like Jericho either. I specifically talked about the Blackpool Combat Club and the Elite. Which has given us compelling storylines and elevated those around them, but that doesn't fit your narrative so you brought up something only tangentially related to what I was talking about.

AND FINALLY, THE RACE CARD. First off, I'm a minority myself. I'm from the Philippines, dude. You really don't think that there's any other reason for us wanting Cody to win over Roman? You think it'd be different if it was a white man?

Are we really forgetting about this guy? Who through no fault of his own, ended up burying a lot of talent and was kept protected in the main event? Was always chosen over talent the fans wanted in that spot and was hated for it?

Roman's beaten everyone for 3 years now. He's held the titles for longer than anyone since Hulk Hogan in the fucking 80s. There's no one left. At least with Cody, you could've booked some new feuds. But with Roman, they're just gonna book more of the same. More of your favorites getting fed to Roman, more Bloodline interference after a ref bump. More. of. the. same.

[justmybookthots]

The Stolen Heir

4.5/5 stars

I am shaking as I write this. Ms Holly Black, WHO ARE YOU AND ARE YOU REAL?!?!

In any case, I finally finished this book. After putting it off for months, I made myself start it yesterday—I told myself I must once I was done with Six of Crows—then finished it today. The first time I tried reading it months ago, my brain was caught in a reading slump, and I couldn't get into it. This time, I was immersed. About a third into the book, I couldn't stop turning the pages. 

(How BEAUTIFUL is this edition, by the way? I want to get my grubby hands on it so bad)

I can't believe how much I enjoyed this book. I went in with not-high expectations because I felt nothing could best Cruel Prince, which was Holly Black's magnum opus in my opinion—and most of the reviews seemed to echo that they found this installment lukewarm—but now that I've read it, I disagree.

It was like the main gripes I had with Cruel Prince were addressed here. I always found Cardan a little too weak, a little too uninvolved in the storyline compared to Jude, but Oak wasn't like that at all. For one thing, he could fight. I was veritably agape when that was revealed. He was a beast with the sword, and unlike Cardan, he was actually bloodthirsty. He was basically Jude—excellent swordsman, excellent strategist, very manipulative—along with Cardan's strengths: charming, silver-tongued, wry.

I saw reviews complaining that Suren stood out, and Oak did not, and now I can't wrap my head around those reviews. 

If anything, Oak hogged the spotlight for the first half of the story for me, a great deal because he was an excellent combatant against their foes. Suren, despite her sharp teeth, was of little use in combat, but that's not to say I disliked her. I do like her, though I have mild gripes with some of her choices and characterisation. For starters, I don't get why she took Oak hostage at the end. I don't like it; it felt irrational and too emotionally driven. The better revenge would just be to send him home to let him stew, and sit with what he'd done. (In her defense, she definitely was emotional. I just wished there was some logic to excuse what she was doing, like trying to seize control of her court using Oak. But I don't get how keeping him hostage would help her with anything other than causing unnecessary war)

She also embodies a major trope I dislike—the Chosen One vibe. One of my criticisms of the story is how glaringly obvious the 'plot twist' was; I saw it coming the moment they introduced the heart. The "unmaking" was such a glaring hint. And the moment the hag talked about making a body out of snow and sticks and animating it somehow? Come on. 

But I didn't care. Almost everything else was lovely. Oak's cleverness really made me SCREAM, specifically when he stole the bridle and casually continued his conversation with Suren like he wasn't at all up to no good, as if he hadn't just caught her in the act. And how, without even chasing after her, he got her to walk back to him. 

Perhaps a large part of my love for this book is Oak's characterisation. However, I did enjoy the quest storyline, which I know isn't for everyone—but I was having such a blast when they entered the Court of Moths and Suren had to solve those riddles to save the prisoners, followed by Oak's duel and all those machinations surrounding that. The plot only dragged a little when they entered the Stone Forest, which I didn't care for, but once they were inside the Citadel, I was ENGROSSED. 

I did not expect the tongue-ripping, and I can't believe Holly Black had the balls to go through with it. I LOVED it. 

Also Hyacinth's reappearance made me GAPE. I totally forgot about him, and it was so satisfying seeing that piece of the jigsaw puzzle come to place. (Sorry, my thoughts are all over the place right now.)

(Edit: I also want to mention that the flashbacks to their little moments in the past were so fun to read. And that's coming from someone who generally doesn't like flashbacks in books)

Anyway, I saw someone write that the leads are just another universe's Jude and Cardan. I find that yes, Suren does come off as scheming as Jude, but it's clear she isn't as clever because there's loopholes in her control over Lady Nore. And it's true Oak does have mannerisms very similar to Carden, to the point that I had a hard time reconciling him with the little boy in the original series. But his upbringing is so different—he let himself appear like a coddled, spoiled, weak prince, but he was so much stronger and tougher than that. I love Cardan to fucking pieces and he owns my heart, but Oak was what I always thought an enhanced version of Cardan could be. (Still not sure how I feel about the goat legs, though, lmao. Maybe minus points for that.)

Of course, all this remains to be seen. Oak's characterisation can go downhill in the next book, due to be out next year (how am I supposed to wait?), and I'm in equal parts dreading and looking forward to it. Before I conclude this entry, I do want to say it's interesting to see the leads' roles reversed: Cardan—who has powerful magic—and Jude—a consummate swordswoman—compared to Suren, who has the magic, and Oak, who's excellent with the sword. 

I know a lot of people were complaining about the lack of Jude and Cardan in this book, but come on. Oak and Suren captivated me to no end. Still… I think we will almost definitely see Jude next book, when she comes to the Citadel, raging war for Oak. 

If Holly Black hadn't cemented herself as one of my favourite authors of all time before I read Stolen Heir, she has now. This was everything I had hoped for, and more. 

- 25 July 2023