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#this part involved a lot of google searches not gonna lie which is in so small part why its taken so long
xysidhequeen · 1 year
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"I'm flattered you like it enough to read twice, anon!" yeah... twice. twice everyday, that would be closer to the truth <3
Hahahaaaa what? You wut?
I
What
Not just one reread?? But several?? Multiple?? You do this often?? And apparently you're not alone someone else said they reread every time I update.
WHAT?!
I didn't think or even like dream people enjoyed the story enough to reread multiple times 😭 what is this. What.
A present for almost bringing me to tears, anon. This is one of the sweeter scenes in Part 14
💚
There were pictures of a younger Danny, all scrawny, gangly limbs, bright smiles, and eyes full of hope and happiness. There were even more pictures taken in the past two and a half years. Some of just Jason, but majority pictures of Jason and Danny, with a healthy amount of the entire gang.
Jason could see a picture of him and Danny laughing on top of Frostbite's shoulders in the Far Frozen. Jason and Dani riding Fright Knight's steed through Hell while a pack of demons chased them. Sam, Tucker, Danny and Jason on a picnic in the Summer Lands. Jazz smacking Danny when he tried to drink mead in Valhalla while Jason was in the background comparing swords with the valkyries. Sam chatting with Persephone and Pandora while Hades played a board game with Danny, Jason and Tucker while Cujo and Cerberus played tug of war.
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tinyboxxtink · 3 years
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"...So I Married A Monster" *Chapter 2*
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Chapter 1
Chapter 3
Man we just skipped the happy fun times here and went straight into the fire, didn't we? Zero to hundred REAL quick.
What can I say guys, writing is therapy. And I have a lot of demons.
Eventually we'll get some fluff....eventually. Maybe.
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------------------
Rafael went to his car and began to think. He had to trust you would listen to what you said, if you loved him like he loved you, you would. But the thought that terrified him more than losing you right now was that William Lewis was back, and on the loose. He dialed Liv’s number as he sped back towards New York City.
“Liv,” He said very seriously as soon as she answered. “He’s back. Lewis is back,”
Meanwhile
You started to pull yourself together when you heard a small noise from the corner of the room. You saw Maggie standing there with her mouth open.
“Oh baby--” You stood up and walked over to her.
“Why was he saying that, mom?” She had lost her sassy demeanor, and was now just a scared little girl.
“I…” You put a hand on her shoulder. “I don’t know, baby girl,”
“I bet it’s because he’s jealous,” She scoffed, now resuming her angry flippant self. “He’s jealous dad is a better dude than him. I don’t know why--”
“We are not getting into this again, Margaret,” You used her full name, letting her know you meant business.
“You don’t…” Maggie paused. “You don’t believe him, do you mom?”
“What?” You blinked, trying to decide whether or not to answer honestly. Her big doe eyes looked at you, begging you to confirm that her dad was the man she thought he was.
“...No, of course not sweetie,” You shook your head and pulled her into a huge hug.
But you weren’t entirely sure at all.
-------------------
The Next Day In The SVU Office
Rafael and the squad had been working all night since he had made the call to Olivia. The squad room was now full of a corkboard full of all of William’s aliases, past transgressions, etc. Except now your name along with Maggie and Kylie’s names were added on a side stem, with “Billy Loomis?” written above it.
“So, you’re sure this chick hasn’t been helping William this whole time? Helping him hideout?” Fin asked Barba.
“What?” Rafael gasped. “No, not at all. No way,” He shook his head violently. “She didn’t even know who he was,”
“....Mmmhmm,” Fin gave the others a look.
“Look Fin I didn’t come here to here you insult my girlfriend--”
“Your girlfriend?” Nick asked. “Didn’t you say she kicked you out?”
“I don’t care, when she realizes--”
“And what if she doesn’t?” Olivia chimed in. “What if she does try to help him now?”
“Olivia!” He looked at her in betrayal. “Come on, you don’t think--”
“You said that he already convinced her to kick you out by just a few words on the phone,” Olivia pointed out. “Now that he knows you two are involved he is gonna try like hell to drive that wedge further and further,”
“But he won’t be able to if she finds out who he is,” Rafael rebutted.
“But if she won’t look, she won’t know,” Olivia stood her ground.
“She’ll look,” Rafael reiterated. “I know she will,”
----------------------
Back at your house
It was late at night, the girls were asleep and you were on your phone in your bed with a bottle of wine. You had brought a glass to bed with you, but you were drinking straight out of the bottle.
What Rafael said yesterday was eating at you. But what was eating at you more was the fact that you were starting to believe him over the man you had shared your life with for almost a decade, a man who you had two children with.
You looked at your phone which had your text thread with Rafael pulled up on it. You went through all the texts you had ever sent. The late night conversations, the little texts in the middle of the day just to say he missed you. He was so good to you, he always had been. He would never lie to you...would he?
You closed the text thread and opened up GOOGLE. You looked to the sky and asked God to forgive you for betraying the father of your children like this; but it had to be done. You typed in the name “WILLIAM LEWIS” and hit “SEARCH”.
---------------------------
At Rafael’s Home
Rafael was staring at the text thread between you from his own phone, rubbing the screen with his thumb. He wanted so badly to call you, but he knew he needed to trust you to do this on your own. Plus, he was sure you wouldn’t answer if he called anyway. While he was staring longingly at his phone, it lit up:
UNKNOWN NUMBER CALLING
He had a pit of dread forming in his stomach, but he answered the phone anyway.
“Hello?”
“Hello there, counselor,”
“How did you get this number?”
“My lovely wife gave it to me, obviously,”
“You’re lying,”
“Am I?”
“Yes, she wouldn’t do that,”
“Oh really?” He chuckled darkly. “You really think she cares about you that much?”
“I know she does,”
“Well, you know that’s really unfortunate for you, because you won’t see her or my kids again,”
“Why are you doing this?” Rafael asked. “Why do you even have a family? What are you going to do with them?!”
“What?” He laughed. “Nothing, counselor. I assure you,”
“Bullshit,”
“No actually, it’s not,” William explained. “Y’know after I had my little...adventure, in New York. I went off the grid. Wanted to live a normal life for a little while. And then I met Y/N,”
“Uh huh..” Rafael listened impatiently.
“And then I fell in love with her, and we had two beautiful girls. And I love those girls more than anything in this world, Barba,” He explained.
“You’re a fucking liar,” Rafael spit. “You don’t know how to love,”
“Believe it or not I do,” William smirked. “I just...don’t show it in a normal way,”
“Right,” Rafael rolled his eyes.
“Hey, look,” William defended. “I was in love with Y/N for a while, I really was. And then--”
“Then what?”
“Then, she got a little naggy,” William shrugged. “She got on my nerves, and I got that itch again,”
“That itch?”
“Y’know, that...itch,”
“You wanted to kill her,”
“I did,” William admitted. “But I figured killing mommy wouldn’t be something I could get past the kiddos, so I scratched that itch in other places,”
“She did say you travelled a lot…’for work’,” Rafael recalled a conversation he had about him before with you one time, in passing. If only he knew what he knew now.
“Yeah,” William chuckled to himself.
His ‘work’ was quite extensive. And it was exhausting trying to lead a double life, but he was being honest when he said he loved his girls. He really did. He loved them more than anything or anyone he had before, maybe ever. He’d never let anyone hurt them...or turn them against him.
“Anyhow,” He continued. “Y’know I may not be in love with Y/N anymore, but you know what I hate?”
“What?”
“People touching my things,” Lewis growled.
“She is not a THING, Lewis. She’s not even yours anymore,” Rafael yelled.
“See I know you’ve never been married Barba, so maybe you don’t understand this,” Lewis lowered his voice to an eerily calm manner. “But when you marry someone, in front of God and everyone you love, it creates a bond. An everlasting bond,”
“Oh give me a break--”
“And that bond, cannot be broken. ‘Till death do us part,”
“...Are you threatening her?” Rafael was vibrating with rage.
“No, of course not counselor,” William replied innocently. “However, if you were to help her break those vows….I might be forced to,”
“Excuse me?”
“Until death do us part, Barba,” William repeated. “That means either she stays faithful to me, or I’ll have to kill her,”
“Don’t you DARE touch her Lewis, do you hear me?!” Rafael’s blood was boiling.
“Well I won’t have to, as long as you leave her be,” William replied calmly.
“....You won’t get away with this,” Rafael growled.
“Oh I think I will,” William smirked. “Because if you send anyone after me, she will die,”
“You wouldn’t dare,” Rafael growled. “You just said your kids would--”
“So maybe mommy gets in a car wreck on the way home, or God forbid robbed in a parking lot!” Lewis taunted Rafael with an evil laugh.
“You’re the fucking devil, you know that?”
“Maybe, but I know I’m a man who gets what he wants,” Lewis chuckled. “I’ll let you go Barba, I know you’re a busy man. And remember, I’ll be watching!”
And with that he hung up on Rafael.
------------------
Almost immediately after hanging up with Lewis, Rafael’s phone lit up again.
Y/N CALLING
“Holy shit…” He blinked in disbelief at the phone. How did you know?
“...Y/N?”
“Rafa,” You tried to keep yourself from crying, you couldn’t wake up the girls. “Rafa I...I saw William Lewis,”
“Oh god,” Rafael put a hand over his head. “Baby, I am so, so--”
“No, I’m sorry,” You cut him off. “I should have listened to you, I should have googled him, not kicked you out,”
“You didn’t know…”
“No but you did, and I should have trusted you. That’s what you do when you--” You paused, never having had said it out loud before.
“....When you what?” He waited with bated breath.
“When you love someone,” You bit your lip, hoping it wasn’t too late to say.
“I knew it,” He smiled to himself. “I knew you loved me. I knew he was full of shit,”
“What do you mean he?” Your eyes quirked.
“Shit,” Rafael realized he misspoke. “Um, well--”
“He called you, didn’t he?” You asked.
“...He said you gave him my number,” Rafael confessed.
“I didn’t, I swear to God Rafa I didn’t,” Tears stung your eyes. “I-I don’t know how he--”
“It’s fine, carino,” He assured you. “He has his ways, I know that,”
“Okay…” You said softly, not really sure he believed you. Damn Billy. Damn him to hell.
“Speaking of ‘his ways’--,” Rafael added with an uncomfortable clearing of his throat.
Oh God. What was he going to say?
“He...we…” Rafael tried to get the words out, he really didn’t want to say them out loud.
“He what, Rafael?” You pressed him.
“He said that I can’t see you again,” He closed his eyes as the words fell out of his mouth.
“What?” You nearly dropped the wine bottle all over your sheets.
“I can’t--” He started to repeat himself.
“No,” You cut him off. “No that is not--” There was no way in hell Billy was going to keep you from Rafael, not now.
“He said he would kill you, Y/N,” Rafael said very pensively.
“Well why hasn’t he done it already?!” You raised your voice, quickly looking to the door to make sure the girls hadn’t heard you. They hadn’t.
“He said your kids wouldn’t forgive him, and he really does love them,” He relayed what Lewis had told him.
“Ugh,” You gagged. “I can’t believe that son of a--”
“Y/N I believe him,” Rafael interjected.
“About what?”
“All of it,” He sighed. “I...I think he really does love your daughters,”
“...Really?”
“Yeah, he said that’s why he left. He wanted to scratch his...itch, somewhere else,”
“Oh my god…” You wanted to vomit thinking about all the “business trips” Billy used to take. If you only knew what kind of “business” he was in.
“...And I also think he’ll be good on his word of having you killed,”
“Having me killed?” You snorted. “By who?”
“Guys like him, they know plenty of...dark people,” He rubbed his eyes, he was getting a headache from all of this worrying. “He probably has people watching your house right now,”
“No, there’s no--” You looked out your window and down the street. Nothing looked out of place, but now you were paranoid. “...There’s no way, I would notice. I’m pretty sure,”
“Look we may be worried about nothing,” The idea just occurred to Rafael’s mind.
“Nothing? Really?” You laughed sarcastically.
“Well look, if Lewis thinks that you believed him over me, just...just keep him thinking that,” He hated the idea of you pretending to still...like, Lewis but he needed you safe.
“You want me to just go about my life like I don’t know my ex-husband is a psychopath?!” You hissed, really attempting to keep your voice down. The girls definitely could not hear any of this. Ever.
“Just for now,” Rafael assured you.
“Do you really think he’ll think I chose to believe him over you?” You twirled your hair nervously.
“Well, I mean you didn’t--” He paused. “You’ve never mentioned me before, maybe he’ll just think we were a...a fling or something,”
“I was introducing you to my kids!” You cried. “I think that’s a little more than a fling,”
“Okay fair point,” Rafael shook his head. “But, it would make perfect sense that you would just believe him at his word that I was the bad guy, right? He’s the father of your children, I’m just some guy you were having sex with for a few months,”
“No you aren’t,” You bit back tears hearing him drag your relationship like that. “You know you’re more than that,”
“I mean for the sake of the lie, amor,” He said with a somewhat endearing tone. He liked the fact that you made sure he knew that was a bunch of shit.
“I guess,” You shrugged, still not liking the idea of having to shit on what you and Rafael had. Even if it was just acting. But you had to, for your life. And for your children’s lives.
“Rafael, what if he suspects something? What if he kidnaps the girls?” Your mind was racing with worst case scenarios.
“Y/N I’m telling you, if you just play it cool, he’ll never think anything else about this,” Rafael tried to comfort you through the phone, but he knew it was somewhat fruitless without him being able to touch and hold you.
“....And I’m just supposed to live like this?” You felt tears in your voice. “Just...just never see you again? After I just told you I--”
“Just for now, mi vida,” He tried not to to start crying himself. He had to be the strong one here. “Just until I can-- figure something else out,”
“...I just want you here,” You whimpered.
Your whimpers pierced his heart like a million knives. All he wanted in that moment was to be next to you, holding you while you cried. Protecting you with his life. But he knew in reality, this was how he had to protect you. And your girls.
“I know…” He nodded his head, a few tears dropping down his face. “I just want to be there,”
“...I-I need to go, it’s late. The girls will be getting up for school soon,” You wiped tears from your own face, putting the wine bottle back in your side table.
“Alright, mi amor,” He said softly, not really wanting to hang up. He didn’t know when the next time he’d be able to hear your voice was going to be, and he wanted every second he had left with you.
“Don’t…” He bit back the sobs in his tone. “Don’t call me, or text me. Wait for me to contact you, okay?”
“What?” Your voice went up a register higher. Now you didn’t want to hang up with him, if he was going to ghost you like this. “No, Raf please, we haven’t--”
“I know,” He rubbed his eyes. “I know we’ve never not talked for even a day, I know. And it’s going to kill me, just know that. You’re my best friend, Y/N,”
“Really?” You blinked in surprise. “Even over Olivia?”
“...Don’t tell her,” He cry-laughed. He knew that would be the last time he laughed for a while.
“You’re my best friend too, Rafael,” You were really crying now. “Ever since I met you, you’ve made my life better. And now I’ve gone and fucked it--"
“Hey,” He stopped you with a stern tone. “No. You didn’t do anything wrong here, you understand me? That’s-- that’s not why I’m cutting you off, okay? I’m not punishing you, please know that,”
“...I know,” You replied in a soft voice, almost like a little girl scared of the dark.
“Okay, good,” He breathed in relief. He couldn’t live with himself if you blamed yourself for this mess.
“I promise-- I swear to you, as soon as I think it’s safe I will come straight to you,” He promised. “The very second,”
“Okay,” You nodded in a more controlled, mature tone. You had to be strong now, you didn’t want him to think you were a blubbering idiot without him. You had survived three long years on your own, you could do it again. You hoped.
“I love you, Y/N,” Rafael repeated it for the third time that day. You wished you could record it and play it over and over again, falling asleep to it.
“I love you too Rafael,” You sniffled.
“...Talk soon,” He said softly, then hung up before he could change his mind about the whole thing.
You both cried yourself to sleep that night.
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carrywolfy · 3 years
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okay i will explain the drama
lol im bad explaining things in english because google traslator messed up things but is neccesary to say also im bad at making rant because im not big fan making rants because all bad arguments i did before
i bit copy paste this on my latest deviantart jounal but some changes to be undertandable i know people will block me or doesnt be agree at me but im gonna be honest at this and without fear all everything i saying is truth
Disclaimer: im not harrassing or attack users i just telling about the biggest drama i made on the Leopets site (a fansite dedicated to old school neopets) also please dont attack me because im telling the truth and all the mistakes i made ,please do not think that I am a crybaby because I am explaining honestly and sincerely and also you ask "why you blame yourself?" uff long history but i hope people understand, apart this is not an attempt at sentimental manipulation it is only an explanation of what happened to me.
probably no one will forgive me or they will not understand but I don't care and it's worth saying this, because it was my fault that I caused drama to the Leopets site that I did ... why? there my cases:
well im sorry to say this but is neccesary to say It because is very important, is for my content  that I did before, wow wow wow what? yes is truth because i was navegating in tumblr quiet and searching "leopets" to see what happend until suddenly I saw a post about what happened in that community and they did not lie and this I have to tell is true .. I was a mental illness yes i feel idk what i turned because i before did "zoophile" art and not only i was made porn being minor (well i really make nsfw art at 14 years old in 2016) although it is one of my worst mistakes i made well why? because i was super curious lol... at first time i get disgusted but the second time i was goin to like it blah blah blah oh yeah i was pervert before.. but that's not what matters because well past things lol, Suddenly the user began to give evidence about my content that I did when I was 17 years old before being adult and one of my cringy nsfw art i made before being 18 when thinks is rapist because the "tears" part but well i was thinking "okay is just tear pleasure" but i think dont work and looks like more rapist than tear pleasure, but man is made before being changed but well, because of the content I made now they think I'm a pedophile and a zoophile and i understand and im pretty sure they doesnt forgive me because all the bad things all i made the life, when thats why i need changing my content and no-longer make ilegal content , Maybe that is not an excuse but you must understand how guilty and responsible I am, it is also my fault that I made the admins allow pedophiles,babyfurs and zoophiles and that I understand, also of course now I must mature and be a good person.
speaking explicitly about my content, good sorry for saying this and I hope you do not attack me for doing this and I must be honest with you which one according to the post (please do not attack or insult her because what she says is true) she mentined about my cringy non-human x human stuff i did before specially neopets and kirby (and some other fandoms) when Currently I no longer do human porn or anthro x feral (well I'm fine with human x human, anthro x human and anthro x anthro now ) but is necessary to tell why   In fact, I thought that fictional beings are sanpient, I mean intelligent beings that many do not know, but I thought that it would be also that if it is fiction and the puffball part i have a explaniation how can make more sense most likely they are alien beings since they can interact with other people and do things that humans do, even all aliens are different in appearance and power and sometimes they also live with humans as we saw in animated movies or science fiction (im actually dont do making canon characters i mostly do my adult fcs and legal  i mean vainilla only) , what did a mental sick go to, but it is time for me to change, besides that I put the link to my FA page for some reason, what I did went very wrong and I don't know why I didn't delete my FA account before but well it's my fault and my mentality yeah im dumb.
Speaking abouts my stamps yeah i before again i was pervert and most my stamps are bad...really really bad and i did mostly nasty stamps im sorry but i know was terrible (i plan to deactivate my old deviantart account) so yeah i before If I used to complain about people who do not like the content +18, which I currently respect those types of people because no everybody have same taste or have same thing, so im sorry for all these persons how get offended i was dumb yeah but is not your faulth,is my faulth well yeah also all the accounts i actually using are not NSFW account because im changed now well i dont stop make nsfw but i wont involving too much of that when mostly im actually make sfw art now . But the actual problem is on my cringy stamp about "I love c*ntboys" because i before doesnt know what is trans man and i was wrong saying "c*ntboys" because again before I did not know what transgender people were until I discovered that it was sorry in fact it was one of my worst mistakes that I made also that I no longer use the term "c*ntboy" now I only use the term "trans male", "trans female" and "intersex" well i hate most my stamp i made in the past and my previous account of deviantart because im suck make stamps ,mostly bad argumented and I regret having done it
speaking leopets drama i was thinking what i have done because after reading that user post when i prefer to not naming and I prefer that you investigate for yourselves but I warn you not to harrassing, insult or attack the user and she was right, although if I only made things worse but hey I'm not going to give up I felt bad and I kept thinking about bad things that I did all these years that I can't believe so I had to control myself and try to do the bad things that I did again, and is my faulth to ruin the Leopets community because my bad content i did before and my mental sick thingy,when im not longer a sick person now and im stopping making zoophile and pedophile stuff yeah... And I suggest most of the members of Leopets will not be satisfied with me but they have to know the truth about me, clarify if you and the other members of Leopets, if you are reading this I do not blame you, remember that I know as I said several times I am responsible for the page ending like this and this is a message for the admins, please do not accept more pedophiles or zoophiles since you have to know what to do how to detect one even if they do that disturbing content (like i did before) , Maybe no one will agree with me or forgive me, well if things are not solved just by apologizing but you have to understand the person who converted me and I hope to change (I am changing slowly) I promise you that I will not make illegal content again, also if it was It was a mistake to do it when I was a minor, although I was not the only one but i had some friends from other communities also did it at those ages, I know that I will not return to leopets due to the disaster I made and my reputable content that I made, although if I regret everything, believe me in 2015 when in that year I did not know leopets, I used to steal characters from other artists, even from 2014 to 2015 I traced drawings of others These artists, which later I did not do it again and I regretted it, even in 2015 I was homophobic before because I complained about gay ships because of an ex-friend of mine who was actually toxic and that made me pay attention to him and I regretted doing it, of course I had many bad moments that I did and really if it is terrible what happens, and again I do not blame them, sorry for all the things that I have done but I did not give up since I will begin to evolve a better version of me to leave behind the bad content and my repulsed behavior I did and move on to my changed content which by now will be good and more interesting (im actually mostly sfw art now), also the only bad thing i didnt is babyfur well thankfully but the rest oh god...
also yes i was Kacheekawaii34 in Leopets and i was feeling guilty to all things i ever done but well yeah i got banned on leopets because the drama i caused, also to all leopets member I am not playing the victim or manipulating sentimentally, I am only explaining the truth what happened to me and believe me I am the cause of the problems that occurred in Leopets as well as I said a true im a guilty and sometimes toxic, i dont blame people on leopets when i dont want admins let hiring pedos,babyfurs and zoophiles when again im goin to change and forgotten all the bad things i made,I know that nobody wants me not to return to Leopets but my decision is to grow up and admit my mistakes that I made.  
And one more thing to know is that we are not all the same, we are all different, I mean, we all have different tastes and different things, if for sure I will have no defense and everyone is going to humiliate me for everything I did wrong but it is necessary to know that We can all change and leave behind all the things we have done before and follow our future, even we can all make serious mistakes since effectively nobody is perfect in this world, everyone is different and we are humans and we know humans make mistakes , and im sorry i acted as sick person but i promise wont act like this again
Sorry if some things are terrible explained or repeated, it is that it is super difficult to explain this and if you already know what happened to me and if it cost me a lot to write it but it is necessary to say this the truth about me and surely as I said nobody will To forgive but .. the safest thing is that they must accept my new changes that I will have and I will not be the same as before, now I will be a respectable person and I will not do that repulsive content again and believe me everything that explains is necessary to understand and read this , It was a long time, unless almost not the same thing happened to me like with Nicchi / Blackout, the creator of the well-known fnaf fangame "Dormitabis" to which he turned out to be a pedophile to which he made the reboot of that fangame be canceled after that the team found out what happened with the creator of the fangame towards repulsive things and end up abandoning him (in addition to the fact that the creator left the internet after this scandal) well after talking about this I hope it improves me and I know Feel better since I learned from the things I did and I already had a lesson
well see ya!! and i hope the next year i be better now and changed
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hideyseek · 4 years
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50 Questions You’ve Never Been Asked
tagged by @usersoup <3
What is the colour of your hairbrush?  it is .. black and turquoise, though i must admit that since i’ve cut my hair i rarely use it. 
Name a food you never eat? huh. caviar? i tend to forget about the existence of foods i don’t eat until i’m on the instacard website. chocolate ice cream, i guess. that’s like, a normal-person food i never consume.
Are you typically too warm or too cold? i am constantly too cold. as i type this i am in my apartment in sweatpants under a blanket and my roommate is in shorts and a tshirt.
What were you doing 45 minutes ago? mm i was reading a room of one’s own, at risk of sounding like the pretentious humanities major i am. i’m reading it out of desperation (we are in possession of the writer’s block and we would like to give it up as soon as possible), after having had it in my head to read since i came across a lin-manuel miranda tween in like 2015 telling all young writers to read it
What is your favourite candy bar? i don’t really like.. candy. twix or butterfingers, if i had to pick one at gunpoint.
Have you ever been to a professional sports event? yEAH u fucking bet i went to winterguard international championships twice in high school and bands of america championships once (both as part of my school’s winter/colorguard). i’ve never gone to a pro sportsball match though. 
What is the last thing you said out loud? oh, are you really out there alone? (at my roommate, who is on the balcony with a desk lamp rigged up for optimal dirtball making).   
What is your favourite ice cream? vanilla. or hazelnut. i fucking love hazelnut. 
What was the last thing you had to drink? not to associate myself with brands, but i am drinking sprite as i type this. 
Do you like your wallet? yes! i had my wallet nicked on a bus in the middle of the semester and my replacement is a lovely narrow black folding wallet that i am infinitely fond of.
What was the last thing you ate? the dregs of my cheezits, pepper jack flavor
Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? mm no, though during my phone call with my grandma earlier this week she told me i should buy more clothes no less than four times. she thinks i should own and wear more “pretty girl clothes” and i haven’t the heart to tell her that i think gender is fake. 
The last sporting event you watched? i participated in a harry potter pub quiz over zoom the other week, if that counts. otherwise, probably something televised and american football related, several months ago.
What is your favourite flavour of popcorn? KETTLE CORN KETTLE CORN KETTLE CORN KETTLE CORN KETTLE CORN KETTLE CORN
Who is the last person you sent a text message to? oH thank god i have an interesting answer to this one -- my stage manager/playwright friend, whose recent play i am dying to get a copy of.
Ever go camping? yeah. my family used to go every august with some family friends. 
Do you take vitamins? mm just vitamin d. (fuck off this was not meant to be a dick joke).
Do you go to church every Sunday? nah.
Do you have a tan? not anymore... even during the semester i spend most of my time underground in a basement rehearsal space or in the on-campus computer labs. (hence the vitamin d)
Do you prefer Chinese food or pizza? these are?? not equivalent at all in terms of scope? chinese food, of course. 
Do you drink your soda with a straw? nah. can-to-mouth for me. 
What colour socks do you usually wear? depends on how cold i am: i have some very lovely warm purple socks and some red and black socks that my dear friend gifted me for christmas last? year? but otherwise i have just sports shoes height white socks and black socks.
Do you ever drive above the speed limit? i am gay, i do not drive.
What terrifies you? failure, mostly. i hate that that’s my answer, but there you go. failure, or being putting myself in a situation where i don’t really have a choice in what happens to me.  
Look to your left, what do you see? mm, i just moved from the study to bed so: the empty space in the loft bed railing where the ladder is, a blank wall, the edge and hinges of the bedroom wall.
What chore do you hate? none, really? i’ll get really passive-aggressive about some of the small apartment tidying things in my head, but not often enough that anything comes to mind now. 
What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? how my linguistics prof last semester had folks self-identify if they spoke non-american english in the middle of lecture
What’s your favourite soda? hm, hm. oH. there’s a vietnamese sandwich place in my hometown that has the best lychee soda. (a handful of google image searches informs me this is elisha aerated brand)
Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive-thru? hm, most of the time when i’m going to fast food i’m going to in-n-out with either a pile of theater people or my high school friend group, so sitting. er, going in.
Who’s the last person you talked to? roommates, in person. 
Favourite cut of beef? i could not name cuts of beef if u asked me to really nicely. actually jk i know uh, ox... oxtail? i like oxtail soup.
Last song you listened to? am in the middle of listening to trenchh by cavetown but i’ve been alternating fob and cavetown and bastille on shuffle on spotify.
Last book you read? ella enchanted by gail carson levine, because it is my #1 comfort book.
Favourite day of the week? i like thursdays. they just sound nice.
Can you say the alphabet backwards? if i had like, several minutes, i probably could do it. but everything after w would involve me counting (counting? reciting?) from the beginning.
How do you like you coffee? i’ll drink it any way but black. i have discovered i do not like dalgona coffee. but i like the dark chocolate mocha that peet’s does in the winter a ridiculous amount.
Favourite pair of shoes? i have this pair of converse that’s grey stripes that always makes me feel like a Cool Arts Student, even though it’s actively terrible for my arches. 
The time you normally go to bed? to bed? midnightish. to being asleep? usually 1-2ish. 
The time you normally get up? eleven in the morning, apparently, since that’s what’s been happening now that i’m not setting alarms. during the school year, usually 7:30 or 8 because i work in the scene shop half the mornings of the week.
What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? conceptually? sunsets. aesthetically? also sunsets. metaphorically, though, i prefer sunrises.
How many blankets on your bed? i’ve got a blanket (duvet, maybe? comforter? i have never really vibed with these western concepts of bedding) and another knitted blanket. 
Describe your kitchen plates: black and square and slightly chipped because roommates and i get a bit aggressive with cramming them onto the drying rack. 
Do you have a favourite alcoholic beverage? i like hard cider. (i like soft cider better than hard cider, but the apple taste drowns out the alcohol taste enough for me to have a pretty good time.) 
Do you play cards? haha yeah. whenever i’m home i play 24 with my little brother and lose a lot. or my family’ll play 21. or BS, which i fucking hate because i cannot lie for shit.
What colour is your car? still gay, still don’t drive.
Can you change a tire? mmmmmmmmmmm no. i have a shocking lack of car-related life skills for someone holding down a job that mostly involves wrenches. 
Your favourite province? oh boy. hubei province, bc there’s no country specification and this feels less impersonal than if i were to just point somewhere in australia. 
Favourite job you’ve ever had? hm, let’s limit this to work i’ve done for money, just to narrow the field down. (i tend to like the work i do a lot.) i really really enjoy working as a sound technician, especially as a mic assistant (it checks my “meeting people” box and my “helping people with their emotions” box and my “storytelling for an audience” box because at the theater i work at, pre-show mic check is me talking about my day and has resulted in a handful of people telling me i should try standup). the hours and pay are kind of crap, though. you don’t get friday nights when your friday nights are spent backstage of the same show you’ve heard twenty million times at this point. i also enjoy teaching computer science, because i just fucking like computer science. christ, i just,, miss being at work :c the production of newsies i was gonna do this summer got canceled. 
How did you get your biggest scar? mm, pass. 
What did you do today that made someone else happy? i, hm. everything that comes to mind feels vaguely manipulative, since i can’t really tell if people were made happy? oh! i had an extended slack conversation with one of the academic interns for the cs class i help teach that was basically just us bonding over word humor. he seems like the kind of person who would have gotten a kick out of it. 
I tag: @kittog @wali21 @capt-ann @lemon-yellow @iamanonniemouse @raccoon-sex-dungeon @snakesonacartesianplane @eternalflarg @swimmingseafish (do it if u want! don’t let me bully u into anything)
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pandemicthestory · 4 years
Text
4: tethered
The game has a name. 
The game is called Universe. And it matches the map. 
Thanks Iz.  
Emma sits at her desk, mainlining espresso to the bloodstream, and readying herself to do a deep dive on the internet. Since the beginning of high school, this is how she’s spent many nights--high on caffeine, slouched over her computer, and ravaging the internet for information. Except historically she hadn’t been looking for a faceless man, but researching for the essays of her classmates. 
At up to $300 a paper, Emma had been cleaning up and saving up for two years. Saving for a new life with Julian, away from the family that seemed to have a problem with everything she did. Once she was gone, they could finally turn her bedroom into a gym, or an opium den, really the possibilities were endless. 
Emma has nearly $20,000 in a bank account that no one knows about. No one except Julian. And this means she has almost reached her goal, and that they can finally leave. Get a car, drive somewhere south where it’s warm. Or maybe somewhere north where it’s Canada. They haven’t actually figured that part out yet, but once they get the car, the rest will fall into place. That’s what he’s assured her. And she has chosen to believe him. 
Emma is the kind of best friend who lies. She’s not proud of it, but it’s true. And she feels like she has no other choice. Zoe, Olivia, Madison...they might as well be her sisters. They understand her more clearly than her own sister does. The four of them were connected by the holiest of ways: playing tetherball at recess in first grade. 
In 2020, they had grown into a grungey aspiring comic book creator (Madison), soup-kitchen volunteering empath (Olivia), Harvard-bound jailbait (Zoe), and criminal internet troll (Emma)...but before this, they were four little girls who had one important thing in common: hitting a ball that was tied to a poll. Every day, they’d wait in line together. Madison would always get there first (back then she played soccer and no one could outrun her), and she would “save a spot” for Zoe, who was the most talented player at the time, and her key rival. Olivia, given her sense of morality, would often be called upon to referee any suspicious moves. Wasn’t it remarkable that a sport (that wasn’t even a real sport) could form a sisterhood?
Sisters. Sisters were supposed to know everything about you. But Emma had chosen not tell them about her illegal business. How could they ever understand? All of them with their aspirations and goals, wouldn’t they look at her differently if they knew hers was...money? And a future that in all likelihood would not involve them? That thought was something that caused her a lot of pain and guilt, and one that she made a mental note to talk to Julian about. They hadn’t settled on the terms of their new life together, but they knew that it would have to be a secret from anyone. Otherwise they would be caught and returned. Emma was hoping she could find a way to not cut off her sisters. That he would understand.
*crack*
Emma is startled by her bedroom window opening. Julian has this way of popping up whenever she’s thinking about him. Which happens to be often.
“Dude, can you please text me before you’re gonna come over? Aghh you’re all wet!”
Julian playfully shakes his hair like a dog. 
“It’s raining,” he smiles. 
“No it’s not. I can see out the window.”
“But wouldn’t that be so romantic if I climbed up the side of your house and snuck into your window through the rain?”
“You know, it would, but you didn’t.”
Julian sighs, giving Emma the look that means, “ok stop being an asshole and act like you love me.”  
“Alright I just showered. Look, I brought you flowers.”
“You brought me one flower, and it’s a dandelion from my front yard.” Emma cracks a smile, despite herself.
Julian groans and throws himself down on her bed. 
“Ok, so am I gonna just lay here by myself? You punishing me for something I don’t even know that I did?”
He smiles at her in that “you can’t say no to this smile” type of way. Emma concedes and flops down next to him. He wraps his body around hers, holding her tight. It makes her feel both safe and like she couldn’t get away if she wanted to. Julian is tall and lean, but strong. He has curly hair that always flops in front of his face, and his eyes are dark and wide. He smells like the shower, so that wasn’t a lie. He kisses her neck. She sighs. 
“I missed you.” She says softly. Because she really, really did. 
“I had to go away for a while, to make sure I had my half. And it...took longer than I thought it would.”
Emma sits up. “But you have it?”
He smiles and nods. “What about you, Em?”
Emma gazes off distantly. She’s basically there. If this virus bullshit hadn’t gotten in the way, she would have passed her goal in three weeks, tops. But now…
“I don’t have all of it. Since there’s no school, I’m not sure how I can...but I’m really close.” Emma braces herself for him to be mad, but he isn’t. 
“That’s ok, babe.” 
“It is...?”
“Yeah, we have more than we need. I said 40 because having some extra doesn’t hurt. But we’ll be ok. And we can leave tonight.” 
Emma half chokes, half laughs. “Tonight? Are you insane? I already know the answer to that.”
“Well why not?”
“Um, I mean there’s things I have to do before we go, Julian...lots of stuff actually, I mean I need to pack, square away my accounts, and say goodbye to Isabel, and…”
“Then how bout tomorrow?” 
Julian has a bit of a manic look in his eye, like he hasn’t slept in days, like he’s been doing something he shouldn’t. Emma takes a deep breath, she doesn’t want to know. 
“Give me, um, one week. Ok?” 
Was that a flash of anger that just crossed Julian’s face? It couldn’t be. Those days are past. Julian hides anything that might have been, then just pouts dramatically and nods. 
“One week.”
Emma lays back down with him and they begin to make out. Is one week enough time to sort everything out? To figure out Universe? To find Mason? 
“You haven’t even re-asked me to be your girlfriend yet…” she murmurs. He hushes her. 
They continue to kiss, as Emma’s anxiety grows. Julian’s hand begins to slide under her shirt, but she stops him. Abruptly.
“Julian, I want to tell my friends that we’re leaving.” 
He sits up next to her, immediately serious. 
“You know we can’t, Emma.”
Emma slumps forward. “Am I really just going to disappear without telling them where I’m going?” 
“Yes, that’s exactly what you’re going to do. Anyone who knows what we’re doing is a potential threat to us being discovered. Honestly, what is the point of running away if you’re pretty sure that you’re going to get caught?” 
“But Julian, they’re like my sisters. It isn’t right. They’ll worry.” 
But worse than worry about her, they could forget her. They could close their little circle and be ok with just three sisters. They could be just fine without her. And that is, strangely, the worst fate that Emma can imagine. 
“Emma, no. And I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” 
He gets off the bed and straightens his clothing. He puts his shoes on. 
“Where are you going?”
Julian flashes her a look. This time, the anger lingers. 
“There is a fucking virus that’s going to kill half this country. Right now, people are quarantining because they agree to it. But what happens when there are cops in the streets, saying they’ll shoot us if we even leave our houses? What happens when there’s no food left? I’m getting out of here before it gets that bad, because I want to be in control of what happens to me. If you wanna come with, great. If not, don’t waste my time.”
And with that, he has disappeared back out the window from which he came. 
Emma tries to catch her breath. She’s not going to cry over him tonight. No. Absolutely not. This is the right thing to do. He’s going to save her. They’re going to save each other. He loves her. He loves her.
*buzz*
Her phone lights up on her desk. The group chat. 
Emma rubs her face and examines her phone. 
OLIVIA: does anyone wanna watch a movie? Netflix does this party mode thing now where you can watch stuff with other people
ZOE: i was just thinking about how i’ve never seen gossip girl. Binge?
MADISON: if we watch something less cringey I’m in. back me up Em?
But Emma can’t respond. And now, is when she begins to cry. 
Because they don’t know so many things. And they wouldn’t forgive her if they did. 
The last time Julian was her boyfriend, he cheated on her with someone Isabel’s age. And when Emma found out (through an unforgettable fight with Isabel), she confronted Julian immediately. Surprisingly, he made himself the victim, claiming that Emma hadn’t been a loving enough girlfriend, and that he was desperate for attention. He made her feel like she wasn’t enough, something she already struggled with, and something that she has carried with ever since. 
So after he started texting her again six months ago, she told the first lie to her friends. A lie of omission, really, as she just didn’t tell them about him at all. And then came the next lie, when Emma opened up her anonymous writing service to her schoolmates. Everyone knew about the sophomore ghostwriter, but no one knew it was Emma Bradford. 
Except Julian. And this knowledge is something that he has over her, but that she is 100% sure he would never use against her. Because he isn’t like that anymore. He wouldn’t hurt her again.
Whether Emma is able to look herself in the mirror and make the judgment or not, she’s smart. Technically, brilliant. It’s always been easy for her to label Zoe as “the smart one,” unable to recognize her own intelligence. But Emma built her own PC when she was 12 years old. She learned Python when she was 13. She wrote her own research program that combs sources for students’ papers, allowing her to have an incredible turnaround rate. While Zoe might be the star of AP Biology, Emma’s intellectual strengths just haven’t been required of her yet. So she can’t see their worth.
Emma sits down at her laptop. 
Universe.
After a quick Google search, she is able to find it rather easily. Although, the game is from 1983? This can’t be right...the graphics she saw over Isabel’s shoulder looked modern. But then again, she didn’t get a good look. 
After Emma is unable to find any other Universe games, she decides to download this one. As she starts the download, she sees that the game takes up an absurd amount of memory--about 20x that of a normal game. Very weird. Luckily, Emma has a spare external hard drive that she can download the game onto. Huh. What the hell can possibly be taking up so much space?
The computer determines that the download will be completed in 24 hours. 
What?! Truly unheard of. Ok then, well, seemingly she pounded all this coffee for nothing. Nothing to do but, wait. 
*ping* 
A new message to her ghostwriter account. Mason. Her heart skips a beat.  
MASON: Don’t worry, the time will go quickly
And now her pulse begins to quicken. So this means that she’s right. The map is leading to Universe. Or rather, the map is Universe. 
EMMA: are you watching me?? seriously wtf
MASON: No matter what I say, you won’t believe me.
EMMA: ok well… i just ingested enough caffeine to give myself a heart attack, and now i’m gonna be up all night. will you at least talk to me?
A long pause. Emma knows this is weirdly forward but hey, it’s been a crazy night. So why not. 
But then, he’s typing?
MASON: what do you want to talk about?
Pause.
Randomly, shockingly, in this moment, Emma decides to be honest. Which is something she hasn’t done in a long time. To this person who can’t possibly judge her. 
EMMA: I have three best friends, and I really miss them. I miss being close to them. Seeing their faces in person, and telling them the truth. 
EMMA: Too much?
MASON: maybe you should tell them how much you miss them
EMMA: I’m scared to. I don’t know what will happen if...well there’s a lot they don’t know. And I’m scared if I tell them, they won’t look at me the same. And nothing will be the same. And then I’ll be gone, and no one will miss me
MASON: It sounds like in some ways you’re already gone, and i bet they miss you too
Emma sharply exhales. She sits back in her chair. She isn’t use to being read like that, especially by someone who’s never met her.
She doesn’t want to be gone.  
She picks up her phone, and opens the group chat. 
As she begins to craft the message that will open the door to an explanation, she stops herself. Deletes what’s been written. 
EMMA: i’m down to watch gossip girl 
ZOE: Yesssss queen 
MADISON: traitor 
She can’t tell them. Not tonight. But it’s possible that somehow she might. And she has one week to figure it out.  
Back when recesses were spent playing tetherball, Madison would challenge, Zoe would defend, Olivia would judge.
And Emma, oddly enough, would watch. She would sit on the sidelines while most of the girls in her grade lined up to face the defending champion and she would admire it was so easy for all of these girls to play together, to be instant friends. She wondered if she would ever have that. 
* * *
In a different room, far away: 
A boy sits at his computer. He thinks that the neurotic compassion one girl has for her friends is shocking and intriguing. 
He stares at the sky, wondering if she might be doing the same.
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peeterparkr · 6 years
Text
3 lies° t.h.|(h.o.)
Sincere 
you’re invited over for a family weekend with the Hollands.
summary: time to be sincere
warnings: implicity, invented ish medical terms, lots of swearing, pregnancy mention, super short chapter
prompt: fake dating au
tom holland x reader x harrison osterfield?
words: 3.4k
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Tom was boarding his plane with a sorrow that couldn’t just yet outcome his anxiety. He was nervous and worried in all possible manners. His hands were clammy as he was walking to his first class seat. He sat down and rested back his hair, letting his thoughts immerse him completely.
Y/N had a secret.
But they still hadn’t talked about it, and they probably wouldn’t just yet.
There had been no time, that was the excuse, and though he hadn’t really asked her, there was no other explanation.
Was a secret that involved him, Tom? Had it been something related to the other one?
He didn’t know what to think, because he didn’t know anything about the last time she had seen him. Brad Connors.
She had never been sincere about it, it was her constant secret, her usual lie. Saying ‘oh no, we’re friends’. Tom clearly knew there was something more. And not talking about a relationship, but talking about benefits. Maybe it wasn’t as bad, but Tom would constantly be inquiring whether they’d finally end up together or not. Wishing more often they wouldn’t, of course. He didn’t like Brad, or his relationship with the woman Tom was in love with. He’d just be with her in the night, like strangers. Tom was jealous and angry. He wanted more than her nights, he wanted to be her mornings, her days, either sunny or cloudy. Maybe both with a chance of more.
Brad was just the perfect excuse for her to go away, and he definitely wasn’t anything she was proud of. Y/n was ashamed of Brad, yet she kept calling him.
Y/N wasn’t as innocent as she claimed to be, and while speaking with Harrison they had both realized how they had both despised Brad. It wasn’t uncommon for them, it seemed, to have the same feelings towards the same people. Ah, what best friends do.
Brad Connors had been y/n’s ex-boyfriend, who she had kept seeing even after her breakup, usually, both of them were drunk, y/n at least had to be drunk to meet with him. Harrison had explained to Tom how she would end up drunkenly calling Brad, each time Tom would break her heart. Tom felt guilty, he was pushing his own enemy towards his greatest weakness. Brad was a mess. But Brad reminded Tom of the good days.
“Brad and I hooked up again,” A regretful y/n said as she made herself into Tom’s and Haz’ flat. “Why am I like this?”
“You what?” Tom scowled as Haz threw her a cold bottle of water, as y/n plopped on their couch, placing the cold bottle on her forehead. “Why?”
“Because I’m an idiot, that’s why,” y/n answered. Tom couldn’t be angrier, just a few days ago they had had one of their moments, in which of course eye contact had clearly been something more than eye contact. Such a fool Tom was making a big deal of it, but he still felt jealous, betrayed.
“Clearly,” Haz answered, walking over. “Are you serious?”
“No, I’m joking,” she snapped. “D’ya really think I’d joke on something like that? I’m a moron. And that’s not the worse part.”
“That’s not? The? Worst? Part?” Asked Tom, incredule. “What is it, then?”
“I invited him over to tonight’s party.”
Y/n would constantly use Brad to make Tom jealous, and she’d constantly throw her arms around him whenever Tom was present. Brad was a jerk, but he seemed to get y/n’s self esteem up whenever she was feeling down. So every time she was feeling down, she’d call him to cheer her up.
It was no secret Y/N’s heart had broken on that weekend with Tom’s family, so a part of Tom wondered if she had ended up calling him again. y/n had probably called Brad, and of course, they had hooked up.
He was sweating as the plane started to part. Everything was wrong.
After receiving the call saying his best friend was in a coma, they had gone to her flat, and Tom with the excuse to use the loo, had found something he hadn’t been exactly pleased about. Don’t search if you don’t want to find.
“Hey, Tom, I’m gonna go change, you can… well, do whatever you want,” y/n had kissed his lips, trying to make him feel better. Tom was still in shock. Harrison’s health had seemed in a perfect state but the consequences of the car crash had been delayed and were now paying off. Cerebral Ischemia. Tom had been quick to google it. Only 3 out of 10 patients woke up. His brain had been lacking oxygen since the accident and this had caused him to lose control of his consciousness.
Harrison. He could lose Harrison. And this had happened just after he left, all alone to his parent's place, going with the lie he didn’t live there anymore. Haz still lived with Tom but had left so he could bloody spend the night with y/n. Harrison was such a good friend, and Tom still couldn't believe how selfish he had been.
Harrison had fallen into a coma while he was banging y/n. Bloody banging her while his bloody best friend was in a fucking coma.
Tom wasn’t feeling well, this had all been his fault, as if the emotional baggage he was carrying wasn’t enough. Y/N had gone quiet. They were going to go to the hospital as they were both getting ready.
Y/N was taking care of some stuff as he explored around her room. He found a male green t-shirt, which he assumed it was Brad’s. He was repulsed by this but he let it go, as he let the appealing feeling swipe him away.
He couldn’t be thinking about it. Brad Connors being around her made him go nuts. He despised him. Brad Connors hugging her, kissing her, holding her. Even thinking about his name repulsed Tom. He couldn’t think about him. Not when his best friend was in a coma.
He had sat on the bed, and as she came back he went to the bathroom. He washed his face and rested his hands against the sink looking at himself in the mirror. He stared at his reflection, a pathetic excuse was all he was by now. He was pale, with dark circles around his eyes, and the filthy mirror didn’t help him. He wasn’t himself right now, he didn’t feel like himself. He was so tore apart, not only emotionally but physically, as he stared at the cast, and at his chest knowing the bandages covering him. He was broken, completely broken. Defeated. 
He was upset, at himself, at the situation. He wanted to throw up, to run away and to turn back time to where times were easier. To where he could still hide away his feelings.
He opened up the door, slightly just to see y/n sitting on the edge of her bed, staring at the bedroom wall, emotionless, with a sort of pain hitting her eyes. She breathed in and out, taking a shot of reality as she gulped, laying down, running a hand through her hair. A dash of fear was across her face, she was doing exactly the same thing he was doing.
He closed the door, and opened up her cabinet, wanting to look up for something that could cease his anxiety. His fingers were shaking, and his palsm were sweating. He wasn’t copying with this, he couldn’t be copying with this. 
Harrison was in coma, and Tom fucking realized his biggest problem was with a girl.
He tried to ignore again all his trouble, focusing on the cabinet. The surprise he took as he opened up the door to show a pink box, he read the brand, and then read the product.
A Pregnancy Test. 
And a sudden chill was echoing through his spine, he took the box and sat on the floor, not wanting to open it. It was empty. So she had taken it. 
And as if he had just been ran over by a bus, he started to click stuff up.
“I can’t drink.” The throwing up. “Too soon?” “Baby” ” “I shouldn’t be the reason to ruin your birthday.”
Y/N was pregnant.
“I can’t drink.”
y/n was pregnant.
The throwing up.
y/n was pregnant.
“Too soon?”
y/n was pregnant.
“Baby”
y/n was pregnant.
“I shouldn’t be the reason to ruin your birthday.”
y/n was pregnant.
And she hadn’t told him, and she hadn’t said anything. And even though he wanted it to be his, he didn’t want a baby. Tom was freaking out, just to add even more to the emotional baggage he had been carrying around.
He had to be the father, if the bump wasn’t just yet noticeable, and if the throwing up had just started, then it had to be him. A month, a month pregnant, and she had kept this a secret for all this time.
Unless of course, he wasn’t the father, there was an option. The green shirt was making him think stuff that was getting on his nerves. He couldn’t just yet ask her about it, he wanted her to tell him. But she wasn’t going to.
He knew her, she was probably freaking out all on her own, keeping everything again only for herself.
And she probably was going to keep it for even longer, now that Haz was in the hospital.
She. Was. Pregnant. Though he hadn’t seen the actual test, it happened. She was pregnant. And he could be the father. 
He put the box back into the cabinet, as he walked out to her, sitting beside her. She looked up at him with a sad face. He couldn’t let her know about his shock, though it could easily be hidden by the fact that their best friend was in the hospital. He laid down beside her, as she snuggled closer to him, synchronizing their breathing and staying quiet as if in this moment of sorrow the only thing they needed was each other.
Tom loved her, but he knew he wasn’t ready to have a baby. All the implications it needed, from the actual baby to the press surrounding him. He hadn’t thought about anything. To keep his relationship private was the option, but he still wanted to show her around, for the world to see that he was finally with her. To go, look, she is mine, I’m hers.
But there was still nothing stipulated, they hadn’t really talked about it, and he knew bringing it up now wasn’t the correct thing to do, but he was leaving the next day so it was now or never. The relationship thing, of course. Not the baby. The baby talk could wait, even if it couldn’t, it had to. 
Ethically incorrect, sure. But morally correct, if it made sense. The end did justify the current means.
“Y/N,” he whispered her name, softly. Pronouncing her name was so beautiful, even better than any pet names they could come up with.
“Tom,” she looked up at him. It made it so intimate, to call each other by their names. So stupid for Tom to think that, but it just made him feel as if the world was made up for them and only them. Now as they were lying on the bed, with his fingers slipping through her hair, and staring at the white ceiling, he knew he wanted a sort of scenario like this to happen every day. He wanted her close.
“What are we?” He asked her, making her turn around to look at him, delicately walking her fingers through his chest, so they’d end up cupping his cheek.
“Are we even a ‘we?” She asked.
“I want us to be,” Tom declared, taking her hand in his, pressing his lips softly to it.
“We have made quite some mistakes, Tom.”
Mistakes, it sounded like such a complicated word right now. Like a bad word, like a sin.
“Some mistakes I can bare with,” he shrugged. “And if you’re a mistake, then I hope I keep choosing wrong.”
She smiled, as she looked up to press a soft peck on his chin.
“But we’ve skipped all of the good parts of dating,” she shrugged. “We’ve already said I love you, we’ve already slept together, we skipped the whole magical part of dating.”
“We’re still magical,” Tom shrugged. “We could start all the way over.”
“We can’t do that,” she said, making Tom frown. “I’m sorry, but I can’t keep my hands or lips off of you, and I just wanna hold you all day and just tell you how much I love you.”
Tom’s frown was erased and replaced with a grin, as he laughed. “I love you, too.”
“See? We’ve skipped all the way over,” y/n sighed, “I don’t know, what are we?”
“Saying we’re boyfriend and girlfriend sounds cheesy,” he shrugged. “And saying we’re friends is...”
“No, we’re not friends,” y/n sighed. “Maybe just dating.”
“But we haven’t dated,” Tom laughed, causing her to laugh as well. It probably wasn’t as funny as they were making it seem, but people have their own way to deal with grief. And even if Haz was technically okay, they were mourning him.
Tom and Y/N had their way to mourn stuff, it had happened before, and it usually involved not talking about the subject and just trying to feel any happy emotion, to keep their minds off the topic.
“We could date, though,” she suggested.
“Want to go on a date with me, then?” Tom asked. “You know, we can have the cheesy and cliché date, let’s go out, to a restaurant, I’ll pick you up, bring you flowers, the whole deal, I’ll pay for dinner, and then at the end offer you my coat…”
“And then at the end, I’ll be wondering if you’ll kiss me,” y/n added to his statement, “so you’ll walk me to my door, and I’ll thank you, maybe even tip toe as I’m nervous, as I’m giving you the sign…”
“And I’ll walk away,” Tom continued.
“But I’ll stop you,” she smirked.
“Oh, you will?” Tom chuckled, looking down.
“Yes, to give you back your coat.”
“Such a shame we won’t have our first kiss,” he joked as he leaned over to kiss her. “Such,” he kissed her again. “A” Kiss. “Shame.” Kiss. “Because, damn are we good at this.”
She rolled her eyes.
“There are more important things, Holland” she said, but he chuckled, nuzzling into him. “But if you’re ready, then we can try.”
So easily. So simple. And it had taken them years, and now they were staring at each other.
“I’m ready.”
“I’m not,” she chuckled, “but I’m willing to risk it all, you’re worth it” she admitted.
“So, tonight? Our date?”
“I think tonight’s not the night,” she answered, and Tom felt like a slap on his face, the sudden shock of reality had hit him again.
“Right.”
“We have time to think about it, you have the press tour.”
“And you will come with me,” Tom said.
“I can’t.”
“At least to one country, you choose, you’ll come, I’ll need you, especially after all of this, I need to know you’ll be there, with me, I just… feel like I could so easily break, and I need you there with me, to give me strength.”
“I love you.”
Tom was recalling the events over and over, he wanted to sleep because it was going to be a long flight. He looked beside him, to the seat taken by an old woman, she was wearing perfectly neat clothes and was currently applying lipstick.
That was originally Haz’ seat.
Harrison. He just wanted him to be okay. There was hope, the hope was big, and it was igniting. That had calmed down Tom. He wanted to know what was going to take place today, he wanted to know the hopes of Harrison making it were higher. So Tom was nervous, because he wanted to have an update each minute. And he wouldn’t know how it had gone until 7 hours later. He knew Haz would wake up.
A seven hour flight to decide what he would do with the baby. He didn’t even know how to think about it, how to ask her about it, what he would do about it. It was just another big problem he couldn’t face now. He needed to concentrate on the press tour and that was it.
But he was missing them both, Haz and Y/N. He needed Haz to talk about the baby and he needed y/n to talk about Haz. Missing them both.
It was impossible to keep on going with this. But he had to. For himself, for his fans, for everyone, for Haz and for y/n.
Even the whole cast was going to be a difficult thing to explain, and he knew his car crash was going to be quite the deal in all of the interviews. And then not bringing Harrison.
And his relationship wasn’t even something. Or technically it was, they had agreed on being something. But they weren’t for anyone else. It was a secret they had agreed to keep. It was like the reverse fake dating, now they were faking they weren’t. And that was hard, but it made ir better, more simple. The secrecy made him want it even more.
But the secret reminded him of her biggest secret. What in the world would he do with a pregnant y/n? And why hadn’t she told him yet?
Such a fucking bloody mess. But time would tell.
2 weeks later
Tom was standing in the airport with a bouquet of sunflowers, with a cap and glasses so people wouldn’t recognize him. He knew people would still recognize him, and so far a few fans had asked him for pictures. He was nervous, he was anxious.
Haz’ coma had given Tom a sense of what really was important.
They had walked into the hospital, seeing Haz’ family worriedly speaking with doctors, the young Charlotte was staring at the floor, talking to herself as some tears were streaming down her face. y/n was quick to run to her as she hugged her, telling her she was strong, assuring her Haz was stronger, and that he’d come back, he’d come back. y/n was assuring her, assuring Tom. But they both knew it wasn’t certain, they couldn’t know. It wasn’t possible to know what was going to happen.
It could take hours, days, weeks, months and he could remain in a coma. The hopes were high to wake him up, but there was still the uncertainty killing them all. If Haz was gone, then he wouldn’t know what to do.
He asked if he could see him, even if he wasn’t  awake.
Tom walked in, to see the pale Harrison plugged in, with serums and with cables around him.
He felt his body turned cold at the sight of his best friend. How he treasured him right now, and how an idiot he had been by fighting him for a girl. Yes, Harrison had made mistakes but he had the chance for redemption. Tom had forgiven him completely.
“Hey, mate,” Tom said as he sat across the bed, watching his best friend. “Ah, dude, you need to make it, man, please, I need you man,” Tom spoke.
“I can’t lose my best friend, not forever, and even if we haven’t really been speaking lately, I know you’re still my best friend and I know I can count on you. You’re still missing a lot, got a long path ahead, buddy,” Tom was speaking softly, and he was fighting back the tears. “Please man, be strong, come back, for her at least, for you, I’m not going to ask you to do it for me, because honestly, I’ve been an awful friend. And it’s so selfish of me to ask you to stay for me, when you should stay for yourself.”
Tom sat back watching him. “I mean, I do want you to come back for me, we’re thing one and thing two, if you come back, I’ll be thing two, because, honestly, you deserve to be number one,” Tom continued. “And we’ve still got a lot of memories to make man, a lot of stupid things to do, to say, to deal with bullshit, I don’t know, we have a lot, Haz, you need to make it.”
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viktorbezic · 5 years
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Double Dribbble: Losing Out To Homogenous Design
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I’m not deliberately trying to single out dribbble here. Dribbble is typically used as the poster child and a culprit for homogenous design. Not gonna lie. I wanted to use the title Double Dribbble, while also highlighting what happens when we all use the same sources of online inspiration. IE. The sea of sameness effect. After the demise of FFFFound where I’d uncover all sorts of new visuals, there were no platforms that provided serendipitous discovery until Are.na came along. But getting offline, going through old books, traveling, making trips to galleries, looking at things from different disciplines helps. If your only source of inspiration are the most popular Dribbble shots, or the top UI Pinterest boards, algorithmically served, of course, it’s very likely you’ll come up with something that looks just like the sum total of what you’ve consumed. Ideas come from different recombinations of existing ideas and knowledge. This is true of all creative disciplines. The more unique the combination, the higher the chance of leading to a significant breakthrough (1).
There are many culprits from an over-reliance on data, a focus on utilitarianism, the re-use of the same frameworks, and designing templates without a feel for the content. Why am I writing about this? Hasn’t this piece been done before? Sure it has. But every now again I get bored to tears by digital and UI design and go on the hunt for folks who are pushing the boundary. It’s also a good exercise to re-ignite my own interest in a design discipline that I’ve been involved some, way shape or form over the past decade. I share a similar sentiment to Marc Kremers, “Too many sites are just exercises in good, generically appealing taste. Anyone can do that. It’s super boring.” (2)
I’ve reflected on how we got here not only to push myself but to also highlight some of the pieces I go back to and re-read. Disclaimer: I’ve been guilty of going the templated approach on side projects I’ve launched. I also use a bought template on Tumblr. I’m in the process of rolling my own. So I’m part of the problem as well.
How we got here.
Clean, workable, well-designed interfaces are the baseline. When you get to this point, you’re not finished. There’s still more to be done. I’ve re-read Yaaron Schoen’s piece “In Defense of Homogenous Design” and do agree with some of Schoen’s points. There are some learned behaviors and existing digital design paradigms. Examples include, pull to refresh, swipe to dismiss, underlined hyperlinks, etc. The argument as Schoen presents them go something like this: “This is great. We’re teaching people how to use digital products and if your digital product looks similar, all good. Jackets look the same, we know where the pockets are.” It makes sense, but my gut feeling is this line of thinking can stop us from really evolving a design (3). I know some restraint needs to be exercised so care needs to be taken as you select the right opportunities to level up on. There needs to be some expressive elements and a human touch. If all we did were the basics we wouldn’t need designers. All we would need are the UI frameworks to paint by numbers with.
We can’t always stick to existing paradigms.
There are instances when we can’t always stick to existing paradigms. One example was highlighted in a designer news thread by Renee P. that goes something like this: a decade ago people hadn’t heard of “pull to refresh” or “swipe to dismiss.” These new paradigms had to be invented (4). But with every new platform, the paradigms will need to be created or advance as the technology evolves. When I was working at a large holding company owned digital agency, I remember a VR commerce project we made for the high-end retailer. We’d demo it to our clients and teach them an entirely new paradigm for VR navigation (5). Staring at a diamond for a certain amount of time to advance the experience. Once folks learned it, it became second nature. I’m not big on VR but thought it was a good example from first-hand experience. There’s a host of new technologies we are still defining interfaces for. Some that have no UIs at all as with conversational interfaces and multiple dimensions when it comes to AR and mixed reality, etc. In the context of new platforms, screen-based interfaces may need to be recontextualized as people learn new behaviors and paradigms.
The other reason to break an existing paradigm is to infuse some sort of character into the product and put a unique spin on it. The question goes something like this, back to Schoen’s Jacket Principle, what if I don’t want to wear the same jacket as someone else, or design one like someone else? If I had a to design one, I might put extra pockets someplace else. Maybe there’s an act of discovery there. It’s about a point of view and bringing something unique to the table. As Alan Kay stated, “Point of View is worth 80 IQ points”. Which leads me to my next point.
An over-reliance on utilitarianism creates forgettable products.
Brett Bergeron, Creative Director at the digital product design studio This Also, presents an argument in his piece on “Good Enough Design” that we no longer have major constraints that bind us to just focusing on utilitarianism. And by not injecting personality into a digital product you fail to keep people’s attention. “More than ever, we are at a place in technology where interfaces can be utilitarian and emotionally expressive at the same time.” Bergeron uses This Also’s Google Dots case study as one of the examples. Injecting the search giant’s digital ecosystem with personality with the use of playful animations. Through an expressive logomark people understood when Google was doing something magical for them. He goes on to note that by not going beyond functional design a lot of products fall into the usable but forgettable category. A reason needs to be given to keep a product installed and opened again. As Bergeron notes, It’s worthwhile infusing the product with character so it’s differentiated. As a result, it protects the initial investment in building it (6).
Solely relying on web metrics discounts the team’s intuition and experience.
It’s been shown time an and again that a lot of digital metrics are bullshit. Especially with the increasing levels of bot traffic and fraudulent media buys. If you don’t have a core community of people using your product and you are heavily relying on media buys you may have a harder time trusting your metrics. Numerous studies are out with numbers showcasing billions of lost ad dollars to bots and click farms. The former CEO of Reddit came out confirming how bad the problem has become. Even Facebook isn’t able to identify genuine numbers.
You can’t do without metrics. We need them but it’s a single data point that needs to be paired with feedback from your community, user tests, research and any information to help set the appropriate context. Unfortunately, too many times I’ve seen clients afraid to make calls or provide their own point of view and instead fall back on metrics as a cover your ass tactic. “The numbers said so.” Also, let’s hypothetically say web metrics were accurate and bots didn’t exist. To use them exclusively to design anything results in sterile outcomes.
When folks do A/B or multivariate tests it’s typically done as a best effort approach. We question the design more than we do the science behind the testing and the reliability of the tests. It’s the combination of data (from multiple sources) and intuition together. Not taking the design team’s years of intuition and experience in coming up with a solution is a miss. Lastly, metrics are used to optimize for the local maximum. To make incremental improvements to an existing design. They can’t tell you whether or not you need a whole new design altogether.
Doing what you know will work.
There are many reasons why we fall into this trap. The independent digital designer and author Paul Jarvis attributes it to being victims of our own success. “Sometimes successful work can lead to less innovation, and then the real making stops. You become more like a factory production line than a meaningful creator.” We fall back on what works because it’s comfortable. Not only that, but we’d like to re-use as much work from the last time to get to the finish line faster. Do that enough you stunt your skills and growth, and start to lose touch. Boredom slowly sets in. This doesn’t mean we can’t leverage design patterns. It’s about determining how best to apply them (7).
Lack of diversity in thinking and experiences.
The digital artist and game designer, Morgane Santos not only points out that we are making more or less the same thing, but there’s also a cultural element here at play as well. IE. “The Designer Daves” of the world. Male, black wardrobe, 5-panel cap. The lack of people diversity in the digital design world produces one point of view. Diversity matters in producing work that’s different. Numerous studies show this. As Santos notes, “So, this whole designing with empathy thing? It literally cannot happen if all designers have the same background, the same look, the same style.” (8)
Marc Kremers echoed a similar sentiment and also related it back to the culture of being a designer, “I think designers naturally just want to fit in, have a nice, cute life, do nice, cute things. Work hard, be nice to people. Read Kinfolk. Raw denim. Beards. Flat Whites. Nice fonts, nice illustrations, nice design. Go with the flow. Just good, tasteful things, experiences, and activities. And before you know it, your life is an Instagram feed, literally indistinguishable to any other designer’s nice Instagram feed. You melted into the digital soup. I don’t know if this rant makes any sense, but I guess my awareness or fear of this singularity is just naturally percolating in my work. I’m a nice guy though.” (9)
This is an excellent reminder to collaborate with folks who aren’t exactly like you or at least to reach out for feedback and perspectives from more diverse groups. It takes effort. It’s way too easy to talk to folks that are just like you.
Disregarding Content
Another issue is not taking a holistic view of what we are designing for. Especially when it comes to content. I’ve listened to an Executive Creative Director once tell a team, “We’re great at making beautiful boxes without anything to put in them.” Very organized and thoughtful experience design without any regard for a greater concept, narrative or developing a paradigm that the best suits the content. Travis Gertz in ”Design Machines: How to Survive the Digital Apocalypse”, highlights the perils of not taking content and it’s unique needs to into consideration.
Gertz compares digital design to editorial design and highlights the emotive qualities editorial design historically has. The divergence between the disciplines is in the following areas: How systems are designed, How content is treated, and how we collaborate. In digital design, we nerd out on our CSS responsive grid frameworks, design systems and obsess over style guides and pattern libraries. The goal is typically to design for maximum template efficiency and component reuse. Unfortunately, this is where things end. In editorial design, the philosophy was slightly different. Editorial design systems are made for variation, not prescription.
Gertz also elaborates on how content is treated in the process. It’s not about content first or content last. It’s about the content’s connection to the design. In editorial design its standard practice for content creators and editors to work hand in hand while designing the system. Content development doesn’t come at a later stage to be plugged in once the design is done. It’s just as important as design and engineering. When digital products are built in an assembly line fashion and the boxes are built before the content exists we’ve missed an opportunity.
With the added complexity in digital design over editorial design, other design disciplines were created. User experience design was needed so that the flow of a site, application or product worked. As Gertz alludes to, this is another step in the assembly line where content isn’t carefully considered as there’s not enough collaboration between the creative disciplines. In digital design, a heavy emphasis is placed on dividing up roles by the stages of a project to gain efficiencies from each of the design disciplines. Unfortunately, this created more silos. As compared to editorial design. Where editorial designers knew the design stack from a system-level and how it laddered up to the expression of each piece of content.
Gertz boils down the problem to poor collaboration and a disregard for content. I know this type of tighter collaboration would be harder to scale, but a more editorial lens on things would help guide teams on what should be produced. There’s no need to create a component library of 30 components as a “just in case measure” if the current content only needs 5 of them (10).
Have a concept.
This is critical in other design disciplines. In digital design sometimes we can get away with not having a concept because if the thing works, no matter how basic or boring, you can check the box and tell everyone it works. Or you can fool yourself and everyone else with the cop-out that it’s an MVP (Minimum Viable Product). I remember being part of a large scale multi-brand platform redesign team. We had our very intelligent, engineering-minded UX team present the designs by nerding out on how flexible the components were and how great they looked across breakpoints. The clients were bored but did wind up asking some great questions, “How will our X product look in this thing?” and “What about X visuals that were unique to the brand? Will we have those?” Shame on me, shame on us. Making a site responsive or adding parallax scrolling isn’t a concept. A concept should give the team a guidepost when it comes to selecting grids, type, illustration and interaction paradigms. Developing a concept requires research and mining for an insight to ensure you’re in fact solving the right problem.
References
1. Batey, Mark. “How to Have Breakthrough Ideas.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 20 July 2017, www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/working-creativity/201707/how-have-breakthrough-ideas.
2. “Exploring Digital Design | Marc Kremers, London.” Exploring Digital Design | Marc Kremers, London, Represent UK, digitaldesign.represent.uk.com/index.php/marc-kremers.
3. Schoen, Yaron. “In Defense of Homogeneous Design — Yaron Schoen — Medium.” Medium.com, Medium, 16 Mar. 2016, medium.com/@yarcom/in-defense-of-homogeneous-design-b27f79f4bb87.
4. Schiff, Eli. “In Defense of Homogeneous Design — Designer News.” Open Sans and Baskerville (Libre… — If You Had to Choose 1 Font Pair to Use for the Rest of Your Life –, Developer News, 21 Mar. 2016, www.designernews.co/stories/65889-in-defense-of-homogeneous-design.
5. Publicis Sapient North America. “‘The Apartment — Virtual Reality Retail Experience’ for Retail and E-Commerce (by Publicis Sapient North America).” The Best and Largest Global Advertising Agency Directory & Creative Library — AdForum, Adforum, www.adforum.com/agency/6644039/creative-work/34520718/the-apartment-virtual-reality-retail-experience/sapientnitro-retail-and-e-commerce.
6. Bergeron, Brett. “Good Enough Design — Brett Bergeron — Medium.” Medium.com, Medium, 20 Sept. 2016, medium.com/this-also/good-enough-design-29ab5132f3a3.
7. “Everything I Know.” Everything I Know, by Paul Jarvis, Paul Jarvis, 2013, p. 102.
8. Santos, Morgane. “The Unbearable Homogeneity of Design — Morgane Santos — Medium.” Medium.com, Medium, 10 Mar. 2016, medium.com/@morgane/the-unbearable-homogeneity-of-design-fe1a44d48f3d.
9. “Exploring Digital Design | Marc Kremers, London.” Exploring Digital Design | Marc Kremers, London, Represent UK, digitaldesign.represent.uk.com/index.php/marc-kremers.
10. Gertz, Travis. “Design Machines.” Louder Than Ten, 18 Sept. 2018, louderthanten.com/coax/design-machines.
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Here's what you need to know about those CGI influencers invading your feed
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Human influencers like Bella Hadid and Kendall Jenner might want to secure their positions in the influencer realm before they get ousted by glorified Sims.
That's right: There are now computer generated images that do exactly what human influencers do. There's a human behind each one — coming up with captions and manually generating the content — though it can be unclear who exactly that person is. The financial threads are equally hazy, but you can be sure that someone is making money off of these "people."
According to CBS, the digital influencer market is set to reach $2 billion in the next two years. The scariest thing is just how convincing these artificial influencers really are: 42 percent of people who were following a digital Instagrammer didn't realize it wasn't a real person, according to a recent study by the media company Fullscreen.
SEE ALSO: 'Alita: Battle Angel' is relevant for cyborgs and humans alike
I set out to understand who exactly these new influencers are, and why they exist. That involved interacting with them — or at least trying to. The feeling of being left on read by people who don't exist is a unique one. It also made me feel like they're hiding something. But here's what we know ... so far. 
Rest assured, they'll either save us from the digital malaise we’ve all scrolled ourselves into, or destroy us further. 
Lil Miquela, 1.5 million followers
Lil Miquela, or Miquela Sousa, is a perpetually 19-year-old girl from Downey, California. She has all the necessary ingredients for Insta-success: good looks, flashy clothing, a nonexistent yet bottomless bank account, and a passion for activism. It's easy to forget you're looking at a bot when reading her captions, which are sprinkled with witty remarks and relatable musings. "No lie, I wish I’d been assembled in the ’90s ..." she quips, echoing the very human desire to be from another time. It's part of what makes her so popular — and so uncanny. 
View this post on Instagram
So am I just going to have crushes on everyone this year? That’s how it’s gonna be, huh? Cool, cool.
A post shared by *~ MIQUELA ~* (@lilmiquela) on Jan 4, 2019 at 5:08pm PST
The algorithmic babe was named one of the 25 most influential people on the internet by Time last year, alongside Busy Philips and Logan Paul. (She was the only non-human to make the cut.) It's safe to say the integration of bot personalities into the mainstream has begun. 
In addition to being an influencer, she’s also a singer and merch seller. Miquela has around 52,000 monthly listeners on Spotify. Not bad for someone who doesn’t exist in the physical realm. 
And the merch? Socks from Club 404, Lil Miquela's overpriced swag brand, will run you $30 for two pairs.
But wait a second, why CGI influencers?
Before we introduce more of these new age avatars, it's important to understand how they came to be. Cue Brud. And Cain Intelligence. 
Brud is the LA-based tech startup credited with Miquela's existence. It's described as a  "transmedia studio that creates digital character driven story worlds," whatever that means. Other than that, it's pretty much a mystery. We do know that it was founded by two people: Sara DeCou and Trevor McFedries, neither of whom could be reached for comment. 
Cain Intelligence is even more of a mystery. Founded by Daniel Cain, who may or may not be real, the company is another startup. It describes itself as "the industry leader in Conscious Language Intelligence (CLI), a type of Artificial Intelligence that allows for humans to engage with our specialized robots in free-format, natural language." The website feels bleak and dark, something a villain in a spy movie would create. (It's also pro-Trump.) 
If you're reading this and you're confused, that's sort of the point. Lil Miquela and Blawko, another CGI influencer, are characters created by Brud. Bermuda, also a CGI influencer, was made by Cain Intelligence. Allegedly. But wait: Bermuda now has Brud's Instagram page tagged in her own bio, followed by the message "Look closer"; likewise, Brud's bio identifies Bermuda as a client. Seems like Cain was a marketing hoax to launch Bermuda and her right-wing agenda? As a scheme to get attention for the entire CGI universe Brud has created, it seems to have worked. 
The only person I was able to get in contact with about these three CGI influencers was Jemma Litchfield from Huxley, the creative agency that represents Miquela, Bermuda, and Blawko. In an email, she said she "looked after Miquela." She said they weren't doing interviews, but she'd fact check for me, if I'd like. She didn't offer any clarification about Brud or Cain Intelligence, but instead shifted some sentences around and corrected my first-draft grammar. 
Perhaps the enigmatic nature of Brud and Cain is the reason their influential prototypes have become so successful and so followed. Curiosity today usually leads to a Google search. But when there's no information available beyond what you already know, it can prompt a fascination. Or frustration. 
Anyway, meet Miquela's digital squad: Bermuda and Blawko. 
Bermuda, 133k followers
Bermuda is a controversial blonde known for stirring the digital pot. She's pro-Trump and describes herself as a "robot supremacist." She also once hacked Miquela's page, which gained followers for both of them, pushing Miquela past the 1 million mark, a milestone that opens up a lot of doors in influencer world, including lucrative brand deals with prominent designers. 
Now Bermuda and Miquela are friends who hang out, go to lunch, and put makeup on each other— digitally.
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💚💚💚 Decided to give Twitter another try. I’m BermudaIsBae there, too. 💚💚💚 In a great mood today and I hope you all are, too. Mwah!
A post shared by Bermuda (@bermudaisbae) on Nov 12, 2018 at 5:27pm PST
Blawko, 135k followers 
Miquela and Bermuda are joined by another Brud-born character, Blawko, whom they both seem smitten with. Just like Miquela and Bermuda, he offers an eerily authentic personality. He plays video games, goes on dates, and doesn't clean his room. As for the bizarre love triangle between him, Miquela, and Bermuda ... Are we supposed to imagine them in compromising positions? Is this a clear representation of CGI flirtation by default? We're not really sure! 
View this post on Instagram
heaux heaux heaux
A post shared by 🅱️LAWKO (@blawko22) on Dec 20, 2018 at 3:34pm PST
Aside from the Brud crowd, there are other CGI influencers out there in the digital space.
Lil Wavi, 12.1k followers
If you squint, Instagram user @lil_wavi might seem like just another Soundcloud rapper-looking hypebeast, dressed in the latest streetwear and spattered with tattoos. Upon further inspection, you'll see he's a digitally-rendered avatar in human clothing. His graphics give off an edgy early-2000s Sims vibe. Since he "lives in a computer," he can get his hands on expensive pieces of designer clothing that he describes as "the drip" and cites as his main draw. "I’m all about innovation, encouraging creativity, pushing minds to think out of the shitty boundaries," he — or, rather, the unidentified human speaking for him — told Mashable over email. "I want my fans to be influenced in that way. It’s important to me that I am sending positive vibes out to them all." 
View this post on Instagram
Flameboyyyy 🛸🏴‍☠️ yuhhh my $$ fly 💸💸💸 y’all ready for merch?
A post shared by 🛸LIL WAVI🛸 (@lil_wavi) on Jan 28, 2019 at 10:05am PST
Noonoouri, 279k followers
Brand deals and fashion show appearances abound for this influencer. It's unclear how a digital avatar can attend IRL events, but a quick scroll of her page will show her doing just that. Noonoouri takes her role as influencer very seriously. When Vogue Australia asked about her favorite beauty products, she answered, "I love KKW Beauty contour and highlight — they truly work!" Since she's done ads — on YouTube and on Instagram — for KKW Beauty before, it's no surprise that she would plug the products. What's surprising is that a digital persona who looks straight out of a Pixar short is using makeup and getting paid for it. 
Joerg Zuber, Noonoouri's creator, spent several years making her before debuting the influencer on Instagram. A visit to her page suggests she was recently in Africa for a number of fashion-related appearances. And she's from Paris, France, according to her Instagram bio. "I am who I am. If I can help or support others I am very happy. I believe in swarm intelligence. In times like these we need to share and not to hold back," she told Mashable via email. 
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"I have a real soul," says Noonoouri.
Image: Joerg zuber
Shudu, 172k followers
Self-identified as "The World's First Digital Supermodel," Shudu was created by beauty photographer Cameron James Wilson as an art project. She blew up when her image was featured on Rihanna's Fenty Beauty Instagram page. In the photo, she's modeling one of the buzzy beauty line's lip products and smizing for the ... computer? Though she's more model than influencer, her likeness is used to sell, too. Shudu doesn't have a personality, per se, but it's because Wilson hasn't come across a human that could do her justice — yet: "Only someone similar to Shudu would be appropriate to tell her story, and really shape who she is as ‘person,’" he mused to Mashable via email. He supports the movement to create more digital supermodels like Shudu: "It doesn’t matter who you are, if you study art and learn how to use 3D programs, you too can be a 6ft tall virtual runway model!" 
View this post on Instagram
Shudu @thesavoylondon trying on beautiful #EEBAFTAs outfits, complete with @atelierswarovski earrings. 6 days to go till she shares #redcarpet looks with you all. . @ee @BAFTA . . #3D #3Dart #digitalsupermodel #worldsfirstdigitalsupermodel #virtualinfluencer #BTS
A post shared by Shudu (@shudu.gram) on Feb 4, 2019 at 11:07am PST
Barbie, 6.2 million subscribers
Here's a familiar face. The uber-popular icon that is Barbie has a digital counterpart, and she's a vlogger. Her first video, in which she introduces herself, went up in 2015. In it, she talks about being from Wisconsin (who knew?) and having a sister. "I've always just been curious about things," she shares earnestly, her huge animated eyes blinking like those of a human YouTuber. Since then, she's uploaded over 75 vlogs, most of which include her sister Skipper and boyfriend Ken, to the YouTube channel owned and operated by Mattel. Barbie is the OG influencer — she's known for doing a million different jobs and having fun while doing them. Why reinvent the wheel?
youtube
Balenciaga's digi-models 
While you can't follow these influencers, they're worth mentioning. To show off their Spring 2019 collection on Instagram, Spanish fashion house Balenciaga utilized shape-shifting digital models made by artist Yilmaz Sen. In a series of short video clips on Instagram, the digital models sparked questions about the future of technology in fashion.  With cool haircuts and names like Elsa and Ruben, everything about them screams high fashion. However, unlike human models that walk down runways, these models stand in place and distort themselves like they're made of rubber. Because all haute couture should be shown on computer-generated contortionist models! 
View this post on Instagram
A post shared by Balenciaga (@balenciaga) on Nov 14, 2018 at 1:53am PST
What's next, then?
Tapping around on these digi-fluencer's pages provides an exciting, if not unsettling, look at the future of technology and the part it may play in pop culture. Some question the validity, appeal, and purpose of these bots. Perhaps it's performance art. Or maybe it's all just an elaborate stunt to leverage consumer action? YouTuber Shane Dawson has a popular video dedicated to uncovering the identity of Lil Miquela. He even calls her on the phone — only to be met with a clearly auto-tuned voice who's careful not to give anything away, or falter at all. 
Liz Bacelar, a tech expert, mused to Forbes that we could potentially find ourselves living in a world in which we all have a digital avatar. And with facial recognition being insidiously installed in mundane places (like gas stations) in order to advertise, secure, and identify us, this may be sooner than we think. Just imagine, we'll be in self-driving cars, scrolling by digitized avatars trying to make us use their discount codes. Or perhaps we'll allow our digitized selves to live for us, like we've seen in futuristic movies like Ready Player One and Wall-E. 
Think of your new CGI friends as the pixelated pioneers of a new, formulated frontier. Who knows? Maybe our human selves could be rendered virtually useless. For now, though, we can just keep an eye on Instagram.
WATCH: Dunkin' and Saucony release running shoe ahead of Boston Marathon
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sxix · 7 years
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hey wanna read a fucked up thing about quentin tarantino
first off i don’t care how many people see this post i’m mainly putting it here both to ease my mind bc it stresses me out and also bc sometimes i mention this to people and then they want the full story but i don’t feel like typing it out again
i really don’t know how to introduce this bc it’s gonna sound like a bizarre complex lie and i promise it’s not but this is about how elf (u know the 2003 christmas movie starring will ferrell as buddy the elf and zooey deschanel as a department store elf) was originally directed by quentin tarantino and not jon favreau despite what the movie credits/all of the search results in all of google say
this is an extremely long post because i didn’t want to forget any major details and i’m gonna put a read more here so i don’t clog anyone’s dash read it if u feel like it
to answer the question you probably already have, no i do not have a link to this article or any articles like it you will learn why later but unfortunately if u wanna know what the fuck went down during the filming of elf u have to read through this mess im sorry
so in about 2011/2012 (i was about 13/14 at the time) i was researching behind the scenes production stuff and for whatever reason started focusing on the production of elf and ended up finding an article about how quentin tarantino was the original director of elf and jon favreau was part of the cast (the doctor buddy goes to see w his dad) and generally available on set for advice/assistance bc he had more experience with family friendly comedy and stuff and elf was basically quentin tarantino’s first attempt at branching out into different genres (spoiler alert: it did not go well)
before you ask your second question yes i tried to check and see if the site was satire i know satire sites when i see them but on this site the rest of the articles were perfectly normal and about stuff that had actually happened and most of it i had already seen on more popular news/entertainment sites + i also could not find any disclaimer on the site and usually satire sites will provide a legal disclaimer stating that they are in fact satire
the author did not provide their name or exact occupation (you will understand later) and only claimed to have been part of the production team on elf from the beginning to end of filming so they were present for most of the events that happened during principal photography (aka filming)
according to the source quentin tarantino originally came into the film just trying to diversify his work because pretty much all of it was within the realm of crime thrillers and black comedy (also contained a lot of violence and other not family friendly things)
during pre-production and the very beginning of filming he had to get adjusted to the different atmosphere and was overall pretty optimistic about the decision but as time went on he became progressively less confident and comfortable with his involvement in the movie, basically he felt like it was too much of a change and was never able to become fully comfortable with the new style which was seriously impacting his ability to work on the movie so jon favreau ended up having to completely take over at times because quentin would just show up in a horrible mood and have terrible days of necessarily having meltdowns but pretty much everyone could tell he was really not enjoying directing elf
idk the full details because i am writing this just from my memory of what i read and this part of the original article also didn’t contain too much detail but basically what ended up happening is quentin continued losing interest in being part of elf and a good portion of the way through filming (i think they said it was somewhere around 50-65% however at this point jon did have to step in more often than not) quentin basically gave up and worked out a plan to get his name removed from all of the movie’s records
quentin didn’t receive any of the profits he would’ve made from the film and instead divided his earnings primarily between jon and other higher-ups within in the production but also various less significant members of the production team to help out with salaries as well as a few other things
another part of this deal was that anyone who had been on the production team at any point was allowed to talk about quentin’s involvement, especially to the press because it would defeat the purpose of going through all the trouble to get rid of evidence that he was involved in the film. this is also most likely why whoever wrote this article did not provide their name or exact occupation, however they weren’t really legally bound to that agreement because quentin did not want contracts made or signed to ensure compliance w/the no outside communication rule, he felt like having tons of contracts describing the full situation floating around were bound to end up in the wrong hands at some point  
since jon had basically taken over directing at that point he was just promoted to being the director of the film instead and the movie’s records were changed to credit jon as the director throughout all phases of the movie
they weren’t so concerned with with people from the general public who noticed the change in direction because a) members of the general public weren’t usually on set and if they were it was definitely not so they could directly interact with the crew b) at the end of the day it was their word against the official credits of the movie so if someone said they thought quentin was the director it could be attributed to an honest mistake/confusion with his other work***
***this is something the article only briefly mentioned since it was just from the perspective of a member of elf’s production team but i think it’s important to note that kill bill (all filmed together but released as vol1 and vol2) was going through its phases of production and release around the same time as elf
this is important because it’s highly possible quentin felt he was working on too many projects at once or simply decided kill bill was the priority and he didn’t have time for more extraneous work he didn’t enjoy
in my opinion i think kill bill was likely a bigger factor in his decision to leave elf than the elf article’s author let on but they did make it very clear that quentin had agreed/decided to direct elf with the intention to see it through to the end and did not make the final decision to leave the film until after it had obviously become more of a burden than anything 
i also think his reasoning for erasing his name from the elf wasn’t just general dislike of the movie but rather not wanting it to get mixed up in his other projects that he was known for and actually confident in/proud of especially considering the release dates for elf and kill bill vol. 1 were just under a month apart
now to explain my lack of source: in the article it does state that quentin did not want his involvement to be available even through news publications and anything that was posted either then or later should be removed as soon as it was found
i have scoured every corner of the internet i can think of several times in attempts to find this article again. i don’t remember the name of the website but even if i did i doubt it would help because i’ve done every different keyword search i can think of and come up with absolutely nothing that even comes close to being the original article i read
my best guess is that quentin and/or one of his publicists found the article made sure it was taken down pretty as quickly as possible
i really don’t know what more i can say about this so here is basically all of the previously mentioned information but in a neater format (if u dont feel u need everything reiterated feel free to scroll all the way to the bottom for some additional info and tldr action)
- an article written by someone from elf’s production team (who did not disclose their identity or exact occupation) submitted an article (that i have not been able to relocate since originally reading it in 2011/2012) talking about quentin tarantino being the original director of elf 
- no the site was not satire/fake. since i can’t find it i’m not able to provide specific quotes or examples from the article but the person who wrote it went into much more detail about the changes to quentin’s attitude toward over time. considering satire is generally used to expose/criticize behaviors within politics and social issues, it’s just not likely for this to have been satire since quentin tarantino’s secret identity as a romantic comedy director hasn’t really been an important social issue at any point in history.
- jon favreau, the person who is now the only credited director, was available on set both as a minor cast member but primarily to help quentin out when needed with the transition from his usual style to a more family friendly world
- his purpose for directing elf in the first place was to branch out, partially to see if he even enjoyed working with such a different style but also to see how comfortable he was working with such a limited amount of involvement in comparison to his usual work (on elf he only directed but in most of his previous films he at least directed and wrote, however in some he was in charge of even more than that)
- throughout filming he became increasingly less confident and happy with his decision to direct the movie and ultimately decided to leave the film, pass the position of director off to jon favreau and use the money he would’ve earned to instead  pay people within elf’s production team both to help cover their salaries and in exchange for removing his name from any and all stored information as well as keep any mention of quentin that could be linked to elf out of the press 
- he opted not receive any money from the production or write up any contracts relating to him leaving the film because he did not want any record of his time with it to be accessible by anyone. because he did not want contracts involved, this meant that no one was legally bound to the agreement not to discuss his time as director of the film. as a result, people were able to write articles like the one i’m describing and not risk prosecution, especially if their identity was not disclosed
- jon favreau was chosen as the director because not only is he an accomplished director who has worked on several movies within the same genres as elf, since he had working on the movie since the beginning there was already documentation of his presence on set and directorial choices he made even before quentin’s departure which would make it harder for people to dispute the claim that he had directed the movie from the beginning
- kill bill was also being filmed/released around the same time as elf so i would not be surprised if quentin also did not want his name to be attached to a movie he didn’t enjoy especially when it was being released within the same month of a movie he did enjoy and feel confident in
- the article this post is about cannot be found. i have tried several times to find it because i know this is a very outlandish piece of information to just randomly have with no sources and that is why i’ve tried to explain it as much as i can from memory and summarize things more than once so i don’t leave anything too important out. 
- i am assuming that the article was found by quentin himself or a publicist of his and whenever they found it demanded for it to be taken down immediately
- i promise this was not just a really elaborate dream i had and somehow retained the details of. i haven’t really talked about this much until last summer when one of my friends was talking about pulp fiction and i remembered all of this shit that i guess i had been suppressing for whatever reason. 
- when i originally discovered the post, i only kind of understood who quentin tarantino even was/had not actually seen any of his movies so i didn’t realize how signifcant the differences were between his work and elf. while i did think the article sounded really strange/unrealistic and checked to see if it was satire (as i do with very article i read that sounds even partially made up), i wasn’t able to appreciate how surreal all of this was and didn’t care about quentin tarantino enough to share the article with anyone and now it’s gone so that’s why i now get to pass this story along through word of mouth as all stories once were
- u may be thinking “wow, this is a pretty elaborate description and analysis of an article you read maybe a couple times four or five years ago” 
- shut the fUck up i did not spend hours writing this post and making sure i remembered all of the important stuff for u to be an idiot i am older now and know more things which means i can comprehend what i remember from the article better than i could the first time i read it so fuck u
- i actually do have very good memory especially when it comes to weird shit like this and i love analyzing things let me have fun and educate u on an important scandal at the same time
- also i really don’t know why this person even came forward and wrote the article since they more than likely knew it was going to be taken down asap and didn’t gain anything from it bc they remained anonymous so ?????
basically just what the fuck
tl;dr quentin tarantino directed elf but quit because he hated it and now whenever he finds an article talking about it he makes them delete it so no one finds out he directed elf also if you tell me im lying after i spent several hours making sure i covered everything and even repeated it all to make sure if i left out an important detail the first time it got included the second time i’ll eat apple seeds until i die of cyanide poisoning 
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theloudpedal · 4 years
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These People Might be Crazy: TLP goes drifting
There’s one kind of automotive event we’ve put off attending for a while now. Not gonna lie, drifting kind of seemed like more of a novelty in the overall pantheon of motorsport. On the drive over to Sonoma Raceway to pull back the curtain on this new to us motorsport we discussed our preconceived notions. Sure, we would have acknowledged that it’s some sort of competition that could be scored…but also something judged on artistic flair or other metric. That it was something other than “real racing” was pretty much how we would have described it. We’ve been around the block a time or two…young guys in slammed late-models, lots of camber, lots of tire smoke, stickers, rev limiters, loud exhaust and lots of pshhhhh…yadda yadda yadda. Been there, done that, wrote the article. (And in our defense, we saw a little of that)
But it was more than that. It was a whole lot more.
Enter Heather Taylor. Long story short, we met Heather at Sonoma Speed Festival this year. Among the many things she does (and there are apparently many) she makes sure that bonehead photographers and gawkers don’t walk on to hot race tracks, and generally helps make sure racing events are safe for spectators as well as competitors. Out of the blue, she sends us an email in her role as PR Manager of Team Faruk telling us about a new Netflix show and a guy named Faruk. We don’t know her real well and we have no idea who this Faruk guy is, but whatever.
Needing another Netflix show to binge like we need another hole in our heads, we binged the Netflix series, “HYPERDRIVE.” It was…well…a lot to behold. Pretty much everything was over the top (crazy) and the color commentary was a bit much, but what emerged as the competition progressed was some pretty impressive driving talent from a bunch of people (some of them well known to others) we’d never heard of. Truth told, we’re still not sure how we feel about HYPERDRIVE. But we digress….
As sure as Heather said, one of the competitors on the show was this Faruk Kugay. Faruk did not win the the HYPERDRIVE challenge, but he did do well, and he drove the holy snot out of his Toyota Supra 2JZ powered BMW M3 putting out over 600HP (We’re no experts, but we were pretty sure that HYPERDRIVE was’t exactly a true “drifting” competition…in fact, it was so over the top, we’re not sure what it represented other than sheer motorsport porn.) The guy’s also a bay area local #represent, and as the google search turned up races in something called Formula Drift (apparently it’s a bit of a “thing,” but again, we’re new to this, #noobs).
So Heather also invites us to come to Sonoma Raceway to meet Faruk, kick some tires and learn about an event he manages called Sonoma Drift and maybe strap into a drift car for some demo laps. What could possibly go wrong, right? Go meet some relative strangers, watch some young guns with flat-brimmed hats hoon around in some home-brewed “race cars” in a parking lot…at night, no less. Then maybe get in one of these things with a stranger and let them do their thing while we sit there and well…hold on and pretend everything is alright (ummm, but it’s crazy). Easy peasy.
Our initial apprehensions were soon relieved when meeting up with Heather and Faruk.
Faruk may be fast in his race car, but he may be just as fast as an event organizer as manager of Sonoma Drift ,which since 2012, has grown to become one of the largest grassroots drifting events in the country. The Wednesday night drifting occurs simultaneously with Wednesday night drag racing, with participants rolling in to race what they brought throughout the evening. Faruk is responsible for ensuring that this, from our outsider perspective, chaos is a safe and as entertaining as possible, with an army of volunteers assisting with the endeavor. He was in a constant state of movement and communication, directing folks and setting up the track configurations, yet made time to give us a tour of the course and explained just exactly what was going to happen once things kicked off. His only currency keeping everyone in line and on program was a fist bump and word of encouragement. Between the drifters and the drags, there were literally hundreds of cars (and a few trucks) ready for action. If this is how many cars come out on a Wednesday evening (as has been the case for the drag cars for decades), the future for drifting is indeed bright.
(We can’t repeat this part enough, Faruk is one of the nicest people you’ll ever meet, and the perfect ambassador for drifting)
The Ride-a-Long:
As part of our visit, we were scheduled to do a ride-along with one of the drift participants. Excitement for the opportunity was somewhat tempered by an incident that Faruk experienced only days prior at SEMA Ignited at the SEMA show in Las Vegas. Putting the “ignite” in Ignited, Faruk had an unscheduled Car-BQ in the drift box outside the Las Vegas Convention Center. A video of the incident was/is all over social media putting the danger of this sport (as exists in any motorsport) on full display, helping us second guess a taste of the full drifting experience. After quickly signing away liability, one of us (Mark) would do some research for the Loud Pedal team and get the full drift experience. Faruk connected us with a participant willing to let a noob sit shotgun and either scream in excitement (or excrement) or cry in fear. A big thank you to Julian Dumay who offered to take our Farouk around the paddock drift course in his Nissan S12 200SX powered by a 350z engine. Below is a compilation of three clips captured during the experience. In the first part, the yelling that can be heard in the background are primal screams of pure joy.
While never getting a completely clean run as each was interrupted by incidents (in which we may, or may not have been involved in) nonetheless it was a grin-inducing introduction to something that we had long misunderstood. Simply thinking about it brings a smile at this moment and the hope to do it again.
Grass Roots:
Drifting as a driving technique has been around since the first person experienced the glee of sliding the rear of their car around a corner successfully. The modern sport of drifting traces it’s origins to Japan and Kunimitsu Takahashi. Takahashi started his racing career with motorcycles and later went on to race cars in the 24 Hours of LeMans, Japanese touring cars and even one Formula 1 race in 1977 at the Japanese Grand Prix. In the 1970s while competing in the All Japan Touring Car Championship Takahashi would overcome the inadequacies of the racing tires used at the time by drifting through the corners to keep up his speed. It was a technique that would put him on the top step of the podium race after race.
What does this history have to with drifting today? Drifting may have gotten its start on the race track but with a little American spin (no pun intended) it has a strong grassroots foundation. Sonoma Drift is a great demonstration of RWYB..Run What you Brung. The paddock was filled with all manner of drifting cars from big American V8s, to vintage and bone-stock rotary-powered Mazda’s. Some came on trailers, but most others were driven in through the main gates. Some owners had a little extra cash for upgrades but generally, the stable of cars reflected the pure passion of the weekend wrench turner sweating and busting their knuckles in their backyards and garages. And We’re Out… After it was all done, and we wussed out of spending any additional time because we were cold and tired (#schoolnight…#oldmen) so on the way home we reflected on what we had just learned. First, we learned that hanging out with drifters as not as bad as our parents had warned us about. Drifting is one of the few automotive sports, where even when a failure occurs it’s still as entertaining and mind-blowing as when the proverbial “it” all goes right. Sonoma Drift also reinforces the utter foolishness of folks that do their hooning on public roads and engage in s(l)ideshow behavior that can end up killing people for no reason. With an investment in some safety equipment (and tires…lots of tires) and for less than $50 every Wednesday night, one can burn up their rubber until the late hours of the evening. Sonoma Drift gives participants an organized and controlled (relative speaking, as it is drifting after all) environment to unleash whatever psychotic sideways fantasies one may have.
(Before we close, we would like to extend our most sincere thanks to Faruk and Heather for their time, their hospitality, and their willingness to hold our hands through our first experience with drifting)
We got a taste for drifting as a sport and as a community, though we still have much to learn (other than that these folks might be crazy) about this side of the motorsport road. We’re already hooked and are planning to return to Winter Jam on December 21-22 to get another dose of this crazy. Amateurs ticking off practice laps is quite a different thing from running in direct competition for cash prizes and/or glory. Registration for each event will go on sale one month prior to event date. Register online at: www.sonomaraceway.com/sonomadrift
Spectator tickets available at Gate 1 Main Entrance - $10 (Kids 12 and under are FREE)Gates open at 3pm - Drifting 4:00pm – 10:00pm (Starting time is subject to change without notice).
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igotapps · 5 years
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[Full Details] How to Make Money Online From Home
For beginners, I did not always understand how to make money online from home. My journey really started in 2013 after being fed up with frustrations of being stuck in cubicle tasks I did not feel comfy with. Not because the job itself was bad, but due to the fact that of the level of tension from other individuals.
By the time I left work, I was so burnt up that did not have any energy left to be there for my wife mentally and invest great quality time with her. I acted unfavorable most of the time and did not understand exactly what was happening to my happiness. See, I was looking for freedom to be there for my other half and do the important things I love doing, when ever I wanted to do them.
Being tied to a job cubicle task where there was not any human relationship involved, was eating me alive gradually. It affected my mood, my relationship, and my life in general.
It was like I was not human anymore, but a robot.
To make long story short, one day I was searching online, much like you, on the best ways to generate income online from home. Not gonna lie, I was a bit skeptical about it. I heard of people being scammed. Possibly you can relate.
However, I was fed up and saw numerous success stories of people earning money online from home. They were normal individuals like you and me and from different backgrounds and occupations. After browsing for an hour or two, I discovered a program that really resonated with me
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Now I'm able to spend more time with my and I'm able to deal with her helping people with their hair requires all while earning money online from home with just a couple hours of work! I enjoy our lives and is thanks to what I took my time to find out and carry out.
Pay very close attention to exactly what I'm about to teach you. If you're brand new to this, this will assist out a lot.
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Let's begin with what you need, to begin earning money online:
1) You need targeted traffic – Traffic boils down to eyesballs or individuals on the internet. Now I stated targeted since you need individuals that are already searching for exactly what you have to offer. I'll discuss that in a minute.
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3) You need sales conversion – OK so now that you're generating leads, you need to begin to generate sales. The leads that you create will ever purchase exactly what you're offering and this is how you start making sales.
Required tools to make it work from home
OK so exactly what was explained above may sound complex, and it can be if you're trying to do everything yourself. It is why you need the right software tools that are going to help the above process be smooth and simple. The following tools are exactly what makes possible for you to make a careful income online on autopilot with just 1-3 hours of work. Here they are:
1) You need a laptop computer or PC to work on and internet connection – That's evident and self-explanatory, right?
2) You need a high quality service or product to provide – Something I found is that countless people are looking for solutions to their problems online. Much like I pointed out above, I was searching online for a method to generate income from home since I wanted flexibility to invest more time with my other half and do the important things I enjoy doing.
So because I thought of myself looking for a solution, I saw that there were thousands and thousands of individuals browsing for solutions to their issues too. With that being said, you require a high quality product that fixes problems in a mass market.
For instance, let's state somebody is searching on Google for "how to lose 5 lbs in 3 weeks". If you had an item that provided that individual that option, do not you think that individual would be more likely to purchase that item from you, if they found your solution online? Heck yeah!
3) You require a system! This is it! As soon as you have the item you're going to need a system that it's going to do the selling and informing on your behalf. This system is made up of 3 main parts.
A capture page or a squeeze article page – I mentioned above that generating leads it's part of the process. A capture page serves that purpose. It offers the visitor a chance to check out your offer in exchanged of their email.
As quickly as the visitor enters their email, they become your lead. Now that they provided you with their email, you can now follow up with them and reintroduce them to the offer in case they did not purchase your offer or did not have a time to view the details about your it.
An autoresponder – After a person enters their email on the capture page you require a software that will store their email and handle it. This is where an autoresponder comes in.
Not just you'll have the ability to send an e-mail out to numerous people one time, but you can likewise setup automated emails that can be sent instantly when a person subscribes and become your lead.
Consider an autoresponder as an individual assistant that can send out emails on your behalf. This is a must have for automation and for list building. The larger the list of people interested in your products, service or opportunity, the more cash you make.
A Sales video – A sales video is a video your lead will be directed to after they enter their e-mail on the capture page. This video will explain or give more details about the offer. Then the lead will have the chance to make a purchase of such product and services.
A check out kind – When the person views the sales video and shows that what is being offer is ideal for them. That person will have the option to click on a buy or an add to haul button, which then will direct them to the checkout page to make a purchase.
4) Learn to get traffic (visitors on the internet) to your system– Getting traffic is the gas of to the engine. Simply put, if you're not getting traffic you're not getting your money system going. If you're brand-new to this, naturally you'll need proper training to execute, though they're simple tasks to do as soon as you get the hang of it.
An that's how you do it. It might look like a great deal of details, but it's very simple to make an income online when you have the right software, the right people, and the proper training at your service.
Source by Michael De La Cruz
The post [Full Details] How to Make Money Online From Home appeared first on Igot Apps.
from Igot Apps https://igotapps.com/fast-app-development/full-details-how-to-make-money-online-from-home/
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anniebannie00-blog · 7 years
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You Can Have A Profitable Affiliate Internet Marketing Strategy
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marissageek-blog · 7 years
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Need To Find Out More Details On Website Marketing? Try These Pointers!
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