#this whole album kicks my ass like its my favorite rn

[bookendsguy]

BUT YOUU DONT LOVE ME THATS NEWS TO ME THATS NEWS TOOO MEEE THATS NEWS TO-

[toxycodone]

My favorite Weezer album (also objectively the worst, DO NOT FUCKING LISTEN TO IT PLEASE /srs I will bite you with malicious intent) is the Pinkerton Album, it's misogynistic and pathetic and fetishistic, rivers cuomo made the rawest sounding incel music ever. The whole album is just rivers screaming and pouting about how horrible his life is because women don't love him, my favorite song by the foxing is also rory if that makes it any worse for you LMFAO

my top 3 Pinkerton songs are "I Just Threw Out The Love Of My Dreams", "Butterfly - Alternate Take", and a tie between "El Scorcho" and "Pink Triangle" because pink triangle is so funny to me, rivers is complaining about the girl he liked being a lesbian, get cucked loser. If u decide to listen to the album, only listen to IJTOTLOMD (acronym for the first song I mentioned, I'm not writing that shit out) and Pink Triangle, they are the least egregious out of the entire album, and IJTOTLOMD doesnt even have rivers singing ITS THE BEST SONG WITHOUT THE ACTUAL LEAD SINGER in it this shows you how bad Weezer is, I'm old Weezer's biggest fan and number one hater I will always make fun of weezer

ALSO OMG THANK U ?? u got me smiling and shit. lol I don't want to get into it but my last partner (online dating) pressured me into being xir dominant and guilt tripped me into doing sexual things for xem ... it just was a bad experience overall. And then bro had the gall to break up with me on my birthday after we were together for over a year and showed me xir new boyfriend the day after like...It was fucked. But I'm better now!! And Im not using the word loser in a demeaning way for myself, I'm like, Hmmm... I have that pathetic sopping wet dog rizz yk? Pathetic Loser ™ is my base state of being, my younger siblings bully me about it but its all in good fun I love them lol. (One of them admitted that I was actually cool so heeheehee)

But thank you I feel special, you have a grown man doing this -> ☺️👉🏼👈🏼 and kicking his feet and shit. I'll give you a little kiss on the cheek as a token of my thanks. Mwah 💋

- the same anon who is still scared of admitting who he is lol

okay you know those guys that like. Seethe because terrible men give bad bitches trust issues??? That’s me rn.

anon you have no fucking idea how mad this makes me 😭 like?? Be so so so fucking fr. YALL HAVE TO STOP FUMBLING BADDIES. GIVE THEM TO PEOPLE WHO DESERVE THEM (ME!!! I WILL CHERISH THEM!!!)

okay as someone who also got burned by online dating (long ass story. which I won’t tell unless asked). I’m genuinely so sorry that happened to you. People online can be such a fucking hit or miss (usually a miss). But your ex’s behavior makes me think your ex is jealous LOOOOL. No one flexes anything if they’re truly happy and content—trust.

I’m still doing this to your ex tho bc I’m petty.

AND YESSS YOU GET IT. Like. When I say loser I don’t mean that in a bad way. Like, more in a colloquial sense. Because really I like nerdy guys bc they’re people who are open and proud of their interests even tho they may seem weird. And they’re just honest about who they are and their abilities. It’s actually really brave. And I love that about them. So. Yeah.

ty for the cheek kiss tho hehe I am glad I was able to make u feel good.

[kuruyuji]

- i’m not okay (i promise)

parings: shuichi saihara x gn!reader

summary: you fall for the emo employee at your local hot topic, and its’s a HUGE crush

warnings: fluff and slight swearing

word count: 1.1k

a/n: short drabble of my favorite emo boy

You were not ashamed one bit that your favorite store was Hot Topic. Your friends can call you childish all they want, nothing was stopping you from walking in.

Today you and your friend Miu were at the mall and you practically had to drag her towards Hot Topic,

“Please Miu,” you whine, “I won’t even take that long!”

Miu pulls her arm away from your grasp, “Hell no! That store is for fucking virgins! I don’t want to be seen in that edgy ass store!”

You pout as Miu starts to walk away from you, “I’ll be at the food court. Have fun buying vibrators and fuck machines.”

“That’s Spencers! Not Hot Topic!” You protested. Shaking your head, you walked inside the store. It was blasting Sleeping with Sirens. Yes! Actual alternative and rocks bands and not indie music! Sure you liked indie, but calling it alt? No, hearing that just made your blood boil. 

You browse around the graphic tees and funko-pops, casually bobbing your head to the music. You saw some anime tees that caught your eye and decided to grab them, along with a My Chemical Romance shirt. Once you got what you wanted you walked to the line. The line was quite long, so you pull out your phone and go through your social media for a bit..

“Next!” the cashier calls. You move forward, eyes still glued to your phone. Placing your shirts onto the counter with one hand while scrolling through your phone with the other.

“Hey,” the cashier greets, “is that all today?”

Your eyes trail up towards the cashier, “Hmm? Oh yeah that's all-” 

You couldn’t help but stare at the cashier. It was a guy who had navy blue hair with side swept bangs. A black baseball cap was covering his eyes, decorated with band pins on the side of his hat. But when you took a look at his eyes when he looked at you again, you can feel your breath hitch. They were golden, and the dark circles around his eyes seemed to make them appear brighter. Not to mention that his eyeliner was flawless, sharp and clean. He wore a Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge t-shirt and a lanyard covered with anime and more band pins. 

You read his name tag, his name was Shuichi.

“Umm,” his voice makes you snaps back into reality. You blink in confusion and look at him. The cashier- Shuichi was looking at you, you can see some sweat forming on his forehead. “I asked if that was all,”

“Oh! Right sorry. Um, yeah that’s all.”

 Stupid! You look away from Shuichi, who was folding your shirts. You take a good look at his side profile, his right ear covered with piercings.

“Cool piercings.” you said before you can stop yourself. Shuichi looks back at you and displays an awkward smile.

“Ah, thank you.” He quickly looks away and goes back to folding your clothes. You don’t know what has gotten in you, but you just HAD to make some type of conversation with him.”

“What’s your favorite MCR song?” you ask him, wanting to kick yourself in the stomach. Shuichi pauses what he was doing and places his index finger onto his chin.

“Hmm, probably I’m Not Okay.”

You beam, “ooh I love that one! Personally mine is Boy Division.” Shuichi smiles back.

“Yeah, that one is amazing too. I think it’s a bit obvious of what my favorite album is.” He looks down, gesturing at his shirt and then tilts his head so you can see some of his Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge pins. 

God damn this emo boy was so fine. You have to come here more often. Over the speakers, Destroya starts playing over the speakers.

“Hey speak of the devil,” you comment, “we’re talking about MCR right now.”

“Well this is my playlist.” A small blush forms on Shuichis face. He neatly folds the last of your shirts.

Yes! We’re getting somewhere, “This is your playlist? Great taste. I heard the Sleeping with Sirens playing earlier.”

“Yea, I saw you headbanging to it earlier,” Shuichi smiles. Wait- he was watching you?

It was then your turn to blush. “oh, you saw that?”

Shuichi pauses his actions. The blush on his face only darkens.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to sound creepy,” he apologized, “It’s just that not a lot of people who come here like my music. A lot of people complain about it being too depressing like ma’am, this is a Hot Topic. If you want happy music there's a H&M next door.”

You shake your head, ”no it’s okay.” you actually didn’t mind. In fact, the thought of him lowkey checking you out kind of made your heart flutter. Shuichi starts adding up your total.

“That’ll be fifty dollars.”

Shit! You forgot how expensive Hot Topic can be. You frown as you open up your wallet. Maybe you can skip a couple of breakfasts. But is a bunch of Graphic tees worth you next few meals? You look at the tees.

Well, they will make cute outfits-

“Sorry again, but are you alright?” Shuichi asks you again. “It’s just that you were spacing out for a bit.”

“Oh my bad, sorry.” you apologized as you hand him the money. Shuichi takes note of the small frown on your face as you hand over the cash. He recognized that feeling, spending all your money on merch. A feeling he knew too well. Just ask the dozens of posters and figuring that cover his wall. He looks at you again, a soft blush covering his cheeks. Shuichi didn’t meet a lot of people who were one: actually alternative and weren’t doing it for a trend. Two: really nice. Three: pretty attractive.

He takes a deep breath, will he get fired? Maybe.

“Here’s your change.” your eyes widen as Shuichi hands you back a twenty.

“I-” you stammered, “I believe I payed you exactly fifty.”

Shuichi pulls his hat down avoiding your eyes, “I don’t mind. It’ll probably just come out of my paycheck.” he slides you a free anime pin too. 

A soft smile spreads on your face. God you loved this emo boy. Filled with determination, you look back at Shuichi.

“Do you want to hang out one day?”

Shuichi looks back at you, the small blush now covered his whole face.

“My lunch break is in five minutes. Want to grab something to eat at the food court?”

Your smile only grew, “I’d love that.”

---

Miu idly checks her phone. She sips on her drink, very close to texting you because you were taking a little too long. She looks up and chokes at the sight in front of her.

With no shame, you and Shuichi stand next to each other, sharing a box of fries and bashful smiles. Your sweater also had a few new (and maybe stolen) pins.

Miu cackles, “You said Hot Topic didn’t sell fuck machines (y/n)!″

ok i’m back, ima try to catch up with all the drafts i have rn

[senchoubutter]

Twisted Wonderland Guys As Kpop Songs I Listen To Too Much + Why

i’ma just say it now, i primarily listen to girl groups since I cover songs and they are in my range and i find them fun to cover most so expect a lot of those.

All songs are linked!!

Scarabia

Jamil

- Lucifer by SHINee || First and foremost I can see him performing this, easily. Aside from that, the song is tasty and classic. Jamil is a smart attractive man that is incredibly talented despite flying under the radar. People know of him but don’t take note until they know him, similarly to this song. It goes hard and you’ve probs heard it mentioned but you haven’t experienced until you played it at 3 am, screaming your heart out. Get to know Jamil and he ain’t just “some guy”

Kalim

- Um Oh Ah Yeh by MAMAMOO || This song reminds me of the 90s/2000s and there’s something about Kalim that also does that for me. Maybe it’s the not a care in the world disposition. I can see and feel in the second verse’s rap, Kalim’s warm smile. I can imagine him grabbing my hand, telling me to chin up. The choruses make me think of simpler times. Finally, Kalim seems like he’s always having a good time just like this song

Ignihyde

Ortho

- Candy Pop by TWICE (yes i know its jp) || This song always puts me in a good mood. It makes me feel warm inside and like everything will work out. When I see Ortho, I feel the need to protect him but also can’t help but feel like everything will be okay. Something about him brings a happy, warm peace to my heart that reminds me to just take a moment and find the good in life. The peppy beat of it just makes me think about how he almost always is smiling!

Idia

- Fairy of Shampoo by TOMORROW X TOGETHER || the song starts an I feel as if I’ve awoken floating in the deep sea, but i’m not scared. I feel at peace and as if I’ve been here before. The song tastes like iced tea and feels like nostalgia. When I look at Idia I see my past self and even present self. I’m afraid, I want to hide. The feelings the verses gives me reminds me of laying in bed, curled up in a jacket that hides my whole body, similarly to Idia’s. The song and Idia’s character call out to a nostalgic but soft side to a distant past I can’t recall. I want to stay with them until I can remember

Savanaclaw

Leona

- gogobebe by MAMAMOO || It’s got a lazy but sexy sound that Leona emboides. When the song picks up in the choruses it’s like it takes over your body, drowning the listener in an ocean of sensuality and playful teasing. It’s got a lil edge though too that caters to the gruff “fuck off” expression he has. I see the noise Hwasa makes at the end as the wanton but confused noise fans make as the man leaves, tail swinging after teasing them

Ruggie 

- BAAM by Momoland || BAAM has such a sassy hyped up beat that screams a bitch that gets shit done, owns who they are, and lives life having fun. And it embodies everything I feel upon seeing Ruggie's smug smile. Even the rap bit during the second chorus has the sass and done-ness of “Leona-san! Get up!!”

Jack

- Bomb by AleXa || This song kicks your ass and so does Jack. Don’t for four seconds think he won’t beat the shit outta ya for underestimating him, similarly to AleXa and her music. The energy and the “I’ll show you” vibes remind me of this big dweeb. I would fear this man but turn to love him much like how I felt about this song as it was this artist’s first song. How do I say they just embody each other in my opinion lol

Pomefiore

Vil

- DUN DUN by Everglow || The sass. This song screams THAT BITCH, just like Vil’s everything. The way he carries himself is personified in this song. The power the song holds reminds me of his unique magic and how intense it is. Finally, the slower bridge is mythical and light as if giving the listener a feeling like they are walking on air and plays to the softer and more feminine side of Vil

Rook

- FINGERTIP by GFriend || Everything about this song is exciting. It’s suspenseful and alluring. If this song was a person, I could clear as day see it winking, whispering “chase me.” And that is exactly Rook’s brand of teasing and games. He’s a hunter but he’s got a charming aura to him still. This song wraps both of those things into it. The dance break is Rook’s darker senses personified. Umji’s lil “OW!” is he’s cute lil remarks in french, throwing you off now and then. But by the end of the song, you’re used to them and adore them

Epel

- Crossroads by GFriend || This song feels like a long lost friend that visits you in dreams. You can practically reach out to them but just as you do, you wake up. But you’re determined. That alone reminds me of Epel’s character as a whole. He doesn’t let his cute appearance push aside his wants and needs to be this tough guy. He, like Yuju’s strong vocals at the last chorus, presses on, determined each time he gets knocked down

Diasomnia

Lilia

- Deja Vu by Dreamcatcher || Maybe I’m biased cause I’ve covered this but this song is breathtaking. The melody speaks of a long road and the fight to keep on which I feel rings true for Lilia. We don’t know his true age but it’s clear he’s been around for quite a wild and the pain he’s probably gone through is unspeakable. He has stories galore and so much experience in life. I feel this song encapsulates a lot of what can only be speculated about him

Silver

- Crème Brûlée by GFriend || the soft, sweet song is addictive and cutesy. I feel Silver gets written off or ignored often, similarly to this song on the album. Sure he may not be god or a bad bad bitch, but he has his own warmth to him. Like this song, Silver makes me wanna curl up under a tree on an August evening and just take in life, making sure to breathe for once, releasing unnecessary tension and stress.

Sebek

- Black Dress by CLC || Sebek is very interesting to me and when he blushes, my whole heart stops for a second. It’s similar to how when they build up to the chorus‘s first Black Dress and the music stops for like a split second. Sebek isn’t my favorite but isn’t my least favorite. I like him more than some though, I’d say. I’d say the same goes for this song. I love CLC, this isn’t my top song of theirs but I still like it a lot. There’s something uniform about the beat that resounds with Sebek as getting shit done in mind also. Sometimes a song just makes you think of a character and you can’t perfectly explain it

Malleus

- Pretty Savage by BLACKPINK || Yes i know t’s only recently come out as i post this, but this bad boy on replay. The beat isn’t crazy upbeat but it’s interesting. Malleus intidimates me in general cause of his aura, and while I love this song a lot rn, it was very intimidating at first. It still has some “don’t come near me” energy. The slower bridge bit calls to his stoic expression, melodic and pretty

Heartslabyul

Cater

- ICY by ITZY || I’ll be honest both Cater as well as this song were things I thought at first were just meh, okay. But as time went on both grew on me. Now that’s not the only reason though I associate this with him. The, no pun intended, ice shattering sound of the song gives me friendly popular girl that seems to be buds with 80% of the school. This is the very vibe Cater always gives me. He wants to just have a good, happy life. Also the song is a “so what? I’m hot. Get over it.” vibe like Cater

Ace

- Drama by TOMORROW X TOGETHER || Ace reminds me the guy you fall in love with in high school and you no it’s not going to last but you let yourself get taken away with. Drama feels like a soundtrack of every fun adventure Ace goes on, no matter the trouble that he may get on. It’s fun beat just brings me back to skipping school, running to my car and trying to sneak away without getting caught. The thought of Ace at my side, would shoot my adrenaline through the roof just like the high note of the song

Deuce

- God’s Menu by Stray Kids || Deuce is just ready to go swinging and that’s exactly what this song is. Elbows up and out, head down, swinging without a clue. The intensity and fire of it speaks to that fire in him. Meanwhile the prechoruses are soft and pleasant almost like it’s not the same song, alluding to that cute lil smile he has got

Trey

- REALLY REALLY by WINNER || Similarly to Ace, this song reminds me of a guy you fall for, but in college rather than high school. Everything about the song and Trey just feels right. The choruses hold your hand and fits perfectly in yours. They know what to say to make everything okay. It may not last, but you sure hope it does and will love them like it will. And while Trey isn’t my number one boy, those are the exact feelings I have about him too. Finally, the rap part reminds me of Trey’s more sadistic side, it bites and you may not think it fits entirely but the more familiar you get with them, the more both fit and you don’t mind it entirely

Riddle

- Wonderland by ATEEZ || The demanding nature of the song makes me think of Riddle immediately. It’s intense and doesn’t mess around; it wants what it wants. Riddle is a rule based person and this song is rather militaristic aesthetically. The bridge though, is so regal and breathtaking. It could stop time. Riddle, despite the kind of guy he is, is the same way. The power he holds is impressive and admirable. This description may seem kinda like I’m shitting on him and see him solely as a rule boy, but like this song, I have made respect for him and wouldn’t want to cross him

Octavinelle

Azul

- Love Battery by Hong Jin Young but performed by LOONA on Immortal Songs || This arrangement of the song has a certain magic to it that I melt in. At the very beginning as the build up singing ‘dangsineun’ i feel like I’m being submerged in a wave, reaching to shake Azul’s hand, signing a contract. The choruses remind me of his smile, how distant but inviting it is. Daring me to fall for him. The dance break bridge reminds me of the intense eyes behind those glasses

Jade

- Love Shot by EXO || This song and Jade are both things I am fearful of but greatly intrigued by. They share a scary beat and energy that says I fear you more when you’re smiling. Please stop slowly walking towards me, you’re scaring me. But at the very same time, the choruses keep me around like how pretty I find this twin. The combo of put together, intellectual friend but could kill easily and without remorse sends shivers down my spine if I think about it for too long. The chorus of this song make me shake my shoulders that suppress a shiver each time

Floyd

- WEE WOO by Pristin || I love both Floyd and WEE WOO. The song is the feeling you get going 85 down the highway. Both song and Floyd, get me excited. They feel like the weekend. That feeling of coming home Friday during high school, tossing your bookbag down, and getting ready to hang out with your best friend. It’s a relieving and exciting feeling. It’s a peppy beat that bites during the harmonies a bit. Just like Floyd. Peppy, fun, but ain’t afraid to take a lil nibble

[pigeonxp]

YGCMA songs and how they relate to c!Wilbur based off of yesterday’s lore (in my biased opinion)

This is so dumb and i literally don’t care. I can’t think about anything else other than doing this synopsis even tho like 28480329204 other people are going to do it. idc. 

(I listened to the songs earlier, and i’m also listening to them as i write the opinions. these are basically just my thoughts while listening tbh. im also not doing the full song, just some things i feel relate within each song)

- Jubilee Line

the lines at the beginning of the song, “hate to see you leaving / a fate worse than dying” could relate to how wilbur feels after tommy gets pulled back into the overworld. or, he could be referencing L’Manburg and how he hates to see his country leaving him (ouch). 

then we have the lines “your city gave me asthma / so thats why im fucking leaving / and your water gave me cancer / and the pavements hurt my feelings”. This could be in relation to L’Manburg as a whole. He put everything he had into L’Manburg and it only ended up hurting him in the end. yikes. 

now we have “shout at the wall / ‘cause the walls dont fucking love you” repeated. This could be in reference to when he said he was fucking kicking and screaming to get out of the train station. hes screaming and he doesnt care because it doesnt matter to him. it doesnt love him just like how the people of L’Manburg didnt love him. wilbur get therapy challenge.

so based on the lore from yesterday, we know that c!wilbur’s limbo was a train station (props to fanartists. i love you.), presumably the YCGMA album cover type deal. when he sings “Theres a reason / that London puts barriers on the tube line / theres a reason / that London puts barriers on the rails” repeated. if the train station looks like how they do on the album cover, there could be barriers where he is. maybe hes trying his best to just kill himself over again by jumping onto the tracks. just in an attempt to escape. jfc 

“theres a reason they fail”. he was still in the train station, wasnt he?

- Saline Solution

for this one, i feel like hes pretty far into the void and regretting his decision to have phil kill him. hes tired of being in a fucking train station for years on end. 

“i think this time im dying / im not melodramatic / im just pragmatic beyond any / reasoning for thinking ive got / fuckin rabies or something.” hes so fucking sick of being in this goddamn train station and he thinks hes dying. hes so pent up and sick of being there, maybe hes just in so much pain that he feels like hes dying. if hes been there for a while, hes probably bound to go crazy at some point, hence the “pragmatic beyond any reasoning.”

“I think ive lost my mind / blurring the fact and the fictions” this feels like he really does believe hes going crazy and is mixing up the things he really knows and the things his mind is creating for him. maybe this is when tommy first arrived and he cant tell if he real or not (thats a stretch but i figured id share it anyway.)

“I think ive made my choice / im a deceased playing victim / slip the face, slip the victory” he quite literally says that hes a deceased playing victim. hes literally saying hes dead HAHHAHAH anyway. maybe hes blaming himself again, because us c!wilbur apologists all know that hes very good at doing that.

“Sit secluded in hatred /.../” hes sitting in a fucking train station for god knows how long beating himself up over and over again and just hating himself. hes all alone. with himself. someone he fucking loathes.

this is honestly all i have for Saline Solution, but i will definitely add more later if i get different theories. 

- Since I Saw Vienna

This is my favorite song on the album and my comfort song so that could factor into this bit ahaha

im going to skip through this one a little bit and go to the line “The roads are my home, horizons my target / if i keep on moving, never lose sight of it / treating my memory of you like a fire, let it / burn out, don’t fight it, try to move on” this sounds like hes reminiscing on his home in L’Manburg and his presidency was something he relied on and he would fight to get it back, but now that hes dead and said that it should remain that way that he should just let it go. trying to move on from his symphony, forever unfinished. 

 “its been sixty weeks since i saw vienna / a bandage and a wide smile slapped across my face / ill pick up my hiking boots when i am ready / and ill put down my roots when im dead.” THESE LINES FUCK ME UP IN GENERAL BUT HOW THEY RELATE TO C!WILBUR RN IS JUST SUIBHYSBUSHDXNSKJDNHBD YK???? in the context that vienna is L’Manburg and he died, its saying that its been a long ass time since hes seen it and hes faking being okay about his death. he misses it but doesnt want to admit it. the picking up the hiking boots when hes ready is him moving on from his L’Manburg, and putting his roots down when hes dead is finally being okay with not living there/being an important part of it. he believed his death was the best for the people in L’Manburg and L’Manburg itself. it seems like hes still trying to convince himself. 

“Ill be gone then, for when you must be alone.” hes gone. hes dead. hes in the train station. he left the L’Manburgians alone and hes alone in his limbo. man. 

- Losing Face

this song is angry. hes so fucking angry. my thoughts are that this is about the following presidents after him. he feels like the L’Manburgians were happier without him and im pretty sure he believed that even when Schlatt was president. this is so evident in the lyric “Is he better than me?” Hes literally asking if the other presidents were better than he was. he doesnt believe he did everything he could to be the best president, even though we all know that he gave everything that he was into that country and then some. he broke himself for the L’Manburg but he doesnt believe hes enough. sheesh.

“Ive seen him / ive been him / ive felt the same way” even though he cant see the new presidents being president, he knows what its like. he knows that they might break under the pressure. hes been there. he knows how if feels. yikes. 

“Ive lost all meaning / ive lost my sense of hope” this feels like when he was nearing the end of L’Manburg when he blew it up, and that he feels like trying to win it back is pointless. he has no hope for it anymore, so why not give up? his mental state is already shit yk so i cant really blame him for feeling that way. 

“i dont care / i want you here / as long as youre happy, i dont care” this line. this fucking line. hes lost hope in being president, but he doesnt care. he just wants the L’Manburgians to be happy. that was his whole thought process while he was president. he didnt matter to himself, he just wanted them to be happy. he sacrificed his mental state for them. cries in wilbur apologist.

- Your Sister Was Right

this is my second favorite song on the album i think HAHAHAH

anyway

“I use everyone i ever meet / i cant find the perfect match / abuse those i love / while i ostracize the ones who love me / back.” wowie wow wow fucking ouchie. He feels like he uses his friends. this whole thing is a projection of his shit ass mental state rn fucking hell. he feels like hes abusive. thats what everyones been telling him. they tell him he was awful and a shit president and all that jazz even though hes been killing himself trying to be the best for them but its still not enough (pigeon projecting? more likely than you think)

“every time that i miss you / i feel the way you hurt / and i dont deserve you / you deserve the world / though it feels like we were built / from the same dirt.” man. hes dead lol. he misses the L’Manburgians. not only were they his supporters, but they were all his friends too. every time he misses his friends he feels their pain of when he first blew up L’Manburg. he feels like because he caused them all pain that they dont like him and that they never liked him and that he is undeserving of their friendship. he still wants to be friends with them. he still loves them. he still wants the best for them. he thinks theyre so much better than him even though they all created L’Manburg together. in reality they are all the same, but their actions impact each other and he feels that his actions make him worse than them or less than. fuckisonmdfnpbhife

“and i hate to say it / but your sister was right / dont trust english boys / with far too much free time” sister is dream mayhaps. fuckngeionsfjg that hurt sorry uhhh anyway yeah sister is dream?? he did say that wilbur would be a shit president and he believes that hes a shit president so he thinks they were all right about him being a shit president  fbhjebinfnejg. maybe sister is just everyone who didnt believe in wilbur. man....

“a fucking waste of time” do i even need to explain this one? he fr doesnt belive hes worth it anymore and that hes literally a waste of time. hjkfbhnfve

- La Jolla

this one feels pretty far into train station limbo to me as well. namely from “and im lonely / there i said it” this could either be him being lonely as president and feeling like he doesnt have anyone to talk to really because hes too busy trying to hold himself together for everyone. either that or hes lonely in the station and didnt want to admit it because this is what he wanted. he wanted to die. he wanted to be dead because he believed thats what everyone else wanted and he just wanted the best for them. 

“i could go away / i could pack my things and be gone before you wake” he could leave if they asked him to. he would do anything for them. 

“you know ive tried hard to love me too / it always seems to fall in, through” this line already physically pained me but now it hurts even more having to relate it to a character i love. we already know that his mental state was declining as his presidency continued, but this would confirm that hes just trying to love himself even though he can never seem to get it right. 

“my own personal sunset” this is just the ‘this is my sunrise’ line but different. my man misses the sun. fuck. 

- I’m Sorry Boris

this song is almost definitely from a long ass time in the limbo. 

“and im sorry / but, boris / im leaving / im not good for anyone here” boris represents L’Manburgians!! hes talking about how hes leaving the world by planning on killing himself. fuck. 

“we reached the end of a decade” mans been dead for a decade. sheesh. 

he then goes on to say that he cant believe hes leaving, he doesnt think he wants to leave them, but he thinks its whats best for them.

he talks about how they do all of these bullshit things before helping you and i know its in reference to london but for the sake of my sanity its about the presidency role and how it will fuck you up before bothering to help you not want to kill yourself.  

should i do a separate post about how i visualized it/about how i thought about the song in paragraph form like a lowkey explanation? idk how to explain it but in this one i wanted to just cover some of the lyrics of the songs and my thoughts on them. i think c!wilbur wrote these in the limbo after he died. i know this is also shit and Not Good, but i really just needed to get my thoughts out before it killed me. i also didnt reread this. its probably repetitive and shit yk. i do Not Care. id also love to hear thoughts on this if yall want to. if you made it this far i love you please hydrate and eat today and youre so sexy ahaha 

“and even though im finished / im not quite done with it” even though hes finishing his symphony by blowing it up, hes now realizing he wished he hadnt blown it up and that he hadnt killed himself. man. 

-

[dylanobrienisbatman]

100 Questions

it’s long so it’s under the cut, but man was this fun. thanks for the tag @the-most-beautiful-broom ♥ i’ll tag my loves (if you want to haha this is a lot) @raven-reyes-of-sunshine @perhalta @dracovengeance @hedaalicia and @amihanmayari

1. What is your nickname? Bails

2. How old are you? 24

3. What is your birth month? February

4. What is your zodiac sign? Aquarius!

5. What is your favorite color? green (Aw hey linds, same !!) 

6. What’s your lucky number? I was number 8 for marching band every single year (F8 for flute 8) except my junior year, and my junior year we had a shit show, so im calling that. 

7. Do you have any pets? 5 dogs back home in seattle but none where i live now or in NY when i get back

8. Where are you from? everywhere and nowhere. my dads military. but im american! 

9. How tall are you? 5’ 5″

10. What shoe size are you? 7

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? A whole lot, but they’re not always all with me. 

12. Are you random? not really. im pretty set in my routines and very comfortably a home body

13. Last person you texted? my best friend @broadwaybound2016

14. Are you psychic in any way? not even a little tbh

15. Last TV show watched? The Bold Type (WATCH IT ITS AMAZING)

16. Favorite movie? I’m not really sure but i just watched Love, Simon and im literally just crying because of it right now so im gonna go with that until further notice

17. Favorite show from your childhood? probably Lizze McGuire

18. Do you want children? Nope

19. Do you want a church wedding? I dont really want to get married

20. What is your religion? agnostic? maybe? im not religious, and not very spiritual. I love spirituality, things like crystals and stuff, but i try not to appropriate those things from groups/cultures who actually use them. I’d love to learn more about them and be someone who actually knew how to practice but, again, i dont want to step on toes culturally and take things that aren’t mine to take

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? a lot! a ton of surgeries on my ears

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? nope, im literally a goody two shoes

23. How is life? lovely

24. Baths or showers? showers!

25. What color socks are you wearing? i dont really wear socks? i like those little half socks. I’m not wearing any rn

26. Have you ever been famous? nope.

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? probably. i’d love to have a voice, and if it was for doing something i love, i cant think of anything better than getting to share my passion with the world like that. But it would definitely be a lot of pressure

28. What type of music do you like? i’m into literally anything. I love Hayley Kiyoko, the 1975, big fan of just basic pop like ariana grande and charlie puth, Harry Styles’s album is a masterpiece, Shawn Mendes, 5th Harmony. i love anything.

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? Yes!!

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? just two!

31. What position do you usually sleep in? on my stomach

32. How big is your house? my house at home is a 5 bedroom 3 bath, my apt in amsterdam rn is just a room in a hotel type place with my own bathroom, and my apt in nyc is a studio

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? i literally hardly ever eat breakfast, but i love a bagel

34. Have you ever left the country? I’m in europe RIGHT NOW! lol

35. Have you ever tried archery? once, i was terrible

36. Do you like anyone? Not right now, but i might want too

37. Favorite swear word? i love the word fuck. it’s got so much you can do with it. i swear like a sailor.

38. When do you fall asleep? ummmmmm? whenever i guess lol 

39. Do you have any scars? A few small ones. a decent one on my knee from falling off my bike when i was 8

40. Sexual orientation? Bisexual

41. Are you a good liar? excellent

42. What languages would you like to learn? ALLLL the languages. I’d love to learn native hawai’ian. i spent my high school years there and the culture is so incredible, and i was so welcomed into it by my friends who were from there, i’d love a chance to really connect too it and try to learn that. 

43. Top 10 songs? Oh boy... im just gonna bullet these because i cant decide the order but this is the general

the way i am - charlie puth

young god - halsey 

rather be - clean bandit

feelings - hayley kiyoko

woman - harry styles 

make me feel - janelle monáe 

six inch heels - beyonce 

get right witcha - migos

my my my - troye sivan 

nice for what - drake 

44. Do you like your country? i’m torn at the moment. I hate tr*mp and everything him and his stand for, but i think america can be a wonderful place. 

45. Do you have friends from the web? Yes!! <3

46. What is your personality type? MBTI: INTP 

47. Hogwarts House? Ravenclaw

48. Can you curl your tongue? yes!

49. Pick one fictional character you can relate to? I am Hermione and Hermione is me. (also i really relate a lot to Lexa from the 100, which... is interesting. the way she suppresses feelings, her generally logical approach to things, the way she is totally useless around pretty girls.) 

50. Left or right handed? right!

51. Are you scared of spiders? If they’re like, big spiders yes. or if they come out of nowhere. im way more scared of cockroaches tho.

52. Favorite food? For some reason this question has been really hard for me lately? idk. i love a good indian style curry, and tacos? 

53. Favorite foreign food? Indian!

54. Are you a clean or messy person? I’m CLEAN, but im messy. i feel like cleanliness and orderliness have been misconstrued to mean the same thing, but clean is to dirty as orderly is to messy. I’m clean and messy, i am not very orderly, and i am NOT dirty. 

55. If you could switch your gender for a day, what would you do? Experience a walk down the street in a city at night where im not afraid

56. What color underwear? black

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? not too long, but it sometimes takes me a long ass time to pick an outfit 

58. Do you have much of an ego? It’s as big as it should be. 

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? i suck on them until i can bite them

60. Do you talk to yourself? Constantly.

61. Do you sing to yourself? Hell yeah

62. Are you a good singer? i’m decent but i need another voice to match with. on my own i can’t carry a tune. 

63. Biggest Fears? failure. and heights. 

64. Are you a gossip? I can be, but never about like.. bad things. I like to talk about how this friend or that friend did x y z cool thing but im not like “omg did you hear so and so hooked up with so and so” 

65. Are you a grammar nazi? Not really because i can’t spell for shit

66. Do you have long or short hair? Short-ish? i cut my hair in march of LAST YEAR and then trimmed it again this year and i want it to fucking grow

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? i would definitely forget some

68. Favorite school subject? History

69. Extrovert or Introvert? Pretty introverted. 

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? Nah, im not allowed too for medical reasons

71. What makes you nervous? when I see kids wandering and their parents not noticing (okay im keeping that because me too, but also travelling? like the in-transit part of travel, catching busses/trains/planes makes me panic)

72. Are you scared of the dark? not at all

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? i try not too unless its major. usually its unintentional or the mistake is irrelevant to the flow of the conversation/situation  

74. Are you ticklish? Yes, but i hate being tickled unless its like, my sister or my dad

75. Have you ever started a rumor? No

76. Have you ever been out of your home country? Yes i have lol (linds, ily, we DEFINITELY have been over this already)

77. Have you ever drank underage? a little, but not until i was like 19, and then i was in europe for 6 months, so i didnt REALLY drink underage until i was like... less than 6 months to 21

78. Have you ever done drugs? Pot pretty regularly here in Amsterdam, and i’ve done shrooms

79. What do you fantasize about? getting a beautiful loft in a big city (preferrably london or NYC), with a kick ass job, a dog, and maybe a girlfriend with huge curly hair.

80. How many piercings do you have? Four

81. Can you roll your R’s? Yep!

82. How fast can you type? I just took a little online quiz that said i can type 72 words per minute with 93% accuracy? 

83. How fast can you run? lol I don’t run (same linds... same)

84. What color is your hair? brown!

85. What color are your eyes? Green!

86. What are you allergic to? I’m a bit lactose intolerant and pineapple makes my tongue itch?

87. Do you keep a journal? no, but i wish i did sometimes 

88. Are you depressed about anything? I’m not depressed “about anything”, im just generally someone who experiences a pretty mild case of depression.

89. Do you like your age? Yeah, i dig it.

90. What makes you angry? bigotry, ignorance, and spilling things. I spill drinks constantly, i spilled a WHOLE BOWL OF CEREAL ON MY FLOOR THE OTHER NIGHT.  

91. Do you like your own name? I didn’t used too but i really do now

92. Did you ever get a foreign object up your nose? not that i know of

93. Do you want a boy or a girl for a child? I don’t want kids. 

94. What talents do you have? i have a pretty great memory, but for random things i dont need 

95. Sun or moon? Moon <3

96. How did you get your name? My dad, he just liked it. My middle name was also my dad, he heard the name Jess on the movie A Man From Snowy River and he thought it was a nice like, nickname/pet name, so he gave me the middle name Ges (pronounced like Jess) with the intent of calling me that (it didnt stick), but he didn’t want anyone to think my middle name was Jessica, so he spelled it Ges.

97. Are you religious? I am not, but i have a lot of respect for the concept of religion, as long as its used for the real purpose, which is to make people feel peace and help people find love and comfort. 

98. Have you ever been to a therapist? I have not, but i shold

99. Color of your bedspread? White

100. Color of your room? White, with one black wall 

[pierresonalthoughts]

im feeling like talking about myself to The Void™

so heres a whole ask prompt that im just gonna answer without nobody really asking for it or reading it, actually

ice cream asks

chocolate: when was your first kiss?

when i was 16, bc my best friend had kissed my our two best friends in a party, drunk off champagne, and she surprise gave me a kiss like a week later to keep it even. I answered saying ‘hey, i guess its a nice time to tell u that im gay?’. we laughed, got real awkward and never talked about that again

but if its the actual kiss that i did wanna have + w a boy, it was when i was 17, one week before the college exam for the one im currently in. bc it is technically the most difficult college exam of the country, or at least the one with biggest competition, i was so fckn nervous that i went on a tinder date with some boy who ended up being such a bad kisser, such a bad conversation and an acquaintance to like half my closest friends.

french vanilla: how old are you?

18, but nearly 19

cotton candy: three places you want to travel to?

germany, japan and england. i used to want to go to USA but with the whole current shituation? nope

strawberry: a language you wish you could speak?

im trying to learn french, german and japanese so theres those

coffee: favorite cosmetic brands?

no cosmetics, we die like goblins

mint chocolate chip: indoors or outdoors?

depends on the mood. i love walking through the outdoors but i literally spent 70% of this semester in my bed, so thats both a reason to favor both options

cookie dough: do you play any instruments?

nope, used to want to play guitar but rn ill just sing badly under my breath

rocky road: favorite songs at the moment?

i have a little playlist of songs that im listening ad nauseum at all times, but rn its either Praying, the whole Melodrama album or the whole Red Velvet new album

butter pecan: favorite songs for life?

between two lungs, the only exception, sakura-colored time capsule

cheesecake: what's your zodiac sign?

libra sun, virgo rising and idk my moon or the rest rly

toasted coconut: the beach or the pool?

pool is p much bootleg beach but i love both. but the whole beach is so good? walking by the shore, the activeness of the water, beach food, the sound of waves, just all in all 10/10

chocolate chip: what's your most popular post?

absolutely this 270k post

bubblegum: books or movies?

with the books i can just savor the story for way more time so books? and i can do it like at random times and places so thats right within my aesthetic whipping out a book at random moments.

but i both wish i had time to read in my shit rushed life and i definitely need more money to spend on actual books. so i end up watchin more movies since i can just watch it at 3am and with some easy pirating

pistachio: manga or anime?

same feelings about books vs movies

salted caramel: favorite movies?

i dont even know really

birthday cake: favorite books?

probably the hitchhiker series, but i love me some classical lit like jane austen and machado de assis

moose tracks: favorites for manga?

i love kuragehime with my life, mob psycho with my soul and jojo (parts 4,6,7) with my full love for extraness

orange sherbet: favorites for anime?

oh man, im going for the ones that made the most impressions on me, like ouran, madoka, bokurano, katanagari, nichijou and psycho pass

peanut butter: favorite academic subject?

like all? i shit you not that i liked all my subjects in high school and now in engineering college, i loved algorithms and data structures

black raspberry: do you have any pets?

nope but i rly want a cat

mango: when and why did you start your blog?

a friend of mine convinced me to read homestuck right after cascade, and when i read it i started following the updates here. so, since october/2011? the truly darkest times of this site. i remember seeing a full episode of doctor who in a 200 gifs gifset when photosets had no image limitation

mocha: ideal weather conditions?

i wanna say cloudy weather but that just makes me depressed. but i love when its raining enough to streets go empty but not enough to it being fully inconvenient when you have an umbrella, bc it makes for the most aesthetic strolls under a nice umbrella, with only my thoughts and music, and protected from the elements

black cherry: four words that describe you?

gay nerd depressed and supportive, i guess

neapolitan: things that stress you out?

my life, all the things i need to do and the possibility of stopping being good at the only things im good at

raspberry truffle: favorite kind of music?

i really cant find a pattern on my music taste so idk

chocolate marshmallow: favorite brands of candy?

i absolutely sold my soul to Fini, not even a question

toffee: a card game that you're good at?

ill kick anyones ass in Uno and ill kick my own ass in solitaire

lemon custard: do you eat breakfast?

yes im one of the few people i know that eats the breakfast from my college cafeteria, but thats mostly bc breakfast food is a loophole in my hundreds of picky eating no-nos

dark chocolate: turn ons?

any boy with piercings gets instant +3 on my 1-10 scale and im a sucker for perfume

fudge: turn offs?

general shitty personality, smoking and i guess i still have some fatphobia to deconstruct too

peach: how do you relax?

haha i dont. but i guess watching anime, scrolling through this hellsite, listening to some tunes, walking around aimlessly and making a cocoon out of myself in my bed count

praline: a popular book you haven't read yet?

im so out of touch with the current trends that i cant even say what i havent read

superman: do you like sweaters?

im living in hoodies for the last month or so but the general weather here is not exactly sweater weather and my hometown only goes from 25-31 celsius everyday of the year

cherry: do you drink tea or coffee?

i hate tea and most of my liquid intake is in coffee with milk

dulce de leche: an instrument you wish you could play?

the piano i guess

blackberry: have you ever laughed so hard you cried?

ofc, either with videos in the interwebs and with my friends

ginger: a new feature you wish tumblr could have?

a more efficient use of internet data when in mobile, bc good god im losing my life waiting for things to load

blueberry lemon: favorite blogs?

i love every webcomic that i follow

almond: favorite mean girls quote?

“too gay to function” is absolutely an accurate definition of me tbh

butterscotch: what color are your nails right now?

no color and 6/10 were bit off

cinnamon: have you ever been confessed to?

indirectly by a girl friend i had in my school, and by my bestfriend’s brother this may

blue moon: have you ever had a crush on someone?

hahahaha im pretty sure i had at least four painfully hopeless and debilitating crushes on straight boys ever since 2013

cappuccino crunch: do you take naps?

my sleeping schedule is so fucked up that i just pass out in the middle of the morning, afternoon or night, so thats both naps and my actual hours of sleep

mint: the most embarrassing thing you've ever done?

hahaha nope, not unearthing any memories, nope, thank you

brownie batter: do you like sushi?

no

key lime: where do you want to be right now?

i wanna be home, in fortaleza

red velvet: do you wear prescription glasses?

yea, ever since i was 5 and i cant see shit without them

green tea: favorite flavors of ice cream?

neapolitan, cream and theres an ice cream shop in my hometown that has a lemon pie flavor that actually sent my soul to heaven