#to explain to you the extent that i have not stopped thinking about this post the other day when i was at work i was thinking about how mtl

[julijbee]

girlbossing too close to the sun.

[crossbackpoke-check]

bring a friend home today! adopt, don’t shop 🐶@metroitdetroitanimals 6.28.2022

[kalims]

⊹ giving them flowers

premise. no plot we are just giving them flowers cause guys deserve some too <3

content. fluff, mini scenarios, azul turns into a silly nerd (affectionate)

featuring. jamil, sebek, riddle, azul.

note. actually accidentally posted this yesterday and got a heart attack (also an actual consistent posting schedule...?)

jamil gives you a look.

he spares a long stare at the bouquet you clutch between your hands, wearing an awfully cheeky grin that's chipping off the scold in his throat. "how many times have I told you this?" he deadpans.

but from the obvious fact that you're holding it. it's not like jamil can do anything about it.

"you don't buy flowers for yourself," he says firmly. I'm supposed to be the one getting them for you. he would like to add.

"they're a waste of madol?" you tilt your head.

he answers immediately. "no, just—" jamil's eye twitches like he's trying his hardest to keep something. "don't,"

perhaps he's being a little too blunt but it makes him upset. is he really messing up in gift giving to the extent where you have to buy something for.. yourself? and jamil is pretty sure gifts are called as such for a reason.

and that they're from, or gifted to another person.

you chuckle in your fist, but he continues to ramble; "also it's hard to care for flowers when you don't know much, i don't want you to—"

"jamil hon, my baby, the apple of my eye, the love of my life, they're for you,"

you say simply, and watch in amusement when his moments stutter before they stop to a complete freeze.

a furious wave of heat crawls up on his back but he's praying frantically. now is not the time. he seethes.

... he just tripped over his words.

jamil reluctantly accepts the flowers after you've finished laughing your ass off, and the only thing in his mind is the love.

okay maybe he should pick up a book about caring for flowers. do they even survive in the harsh conditions of scarabia?

whatever he'll make it work.

you should've expected this.

despite your arm honestly starting to tremble under the stress of holding it out for about 2 minutes straight now, you still attempt a smile—although strained. wouldn't want sebek to find it an unfriendly gesture.

even though he probably already thinks that anyways.

you don't want to color sebek in a way that shows that his only personality is being suspicious to everyone, and of course. the dearest young master he adores. (seriously though it's a little concerning, and you're kinda jealous.)

sebek stares at the bouquet in your hand with scrutinizing eyes, as if to say non-verbally: 'what is this'.

you sigh when he just stares at it like it's a bomb. "it's flowers." you deadpan.

sebek pursues his lips, looks away before looking back. "I can see that!" he says like he wasn't wearing a face that made you think you had to explain. but he just crosses his arms and falls silent with a huff. "for the young master, yes?'

he pauses. "I can atleast acknowledge your gesture, human!"

was that supposed to be good? you weren't given the chance to explain because he continues again; "though I will have to make sure that these aren't anything the young master is allergic to." he nods to himself, as though proud for being so thoughtful.

your eye twitches. you're a little surprised that he didn't even imply that it could be possibly a bomb inside to try and assassinate them.. but you notice a slight tense-ness to his demeanor.

you know cause he's huffed about 5 times in the past 1 minute, he's looked away and he's very clearly sneaking peaks at your hand.

—then he huffs to himself! then it repeats.

"I will take them to the young master at once!" he announces with his loud volume, stepping forward to grab it from you but you ultimately beat him. you're just praying he doesn't find you 10x more suspicious the moment you had wrenched it back to yourself with surprising strength you didn't know you had.

even he looked surprised!

"no, sebek.." you heave. "they're not for malleus, they're for you."

he didn't have the heart to correct the way you addressed the young master before he dutifully exploded.

he's shaking away from you with a wobbling, agape mouth. he could only open and close them dumbly, not beir capable to let a word out.

you suppose he was too speechless because he didn't even say anything when you happily pushed the bouquet to his chest like nothing happened.

for someone who's most diligent in studying, you'd think riddle would be able to catch on easily on the gist of your actions.

but he just blinks when you hold out your hand. pretty gray eyes trained on the bouquet of red roses in your grasp, then onto your face with inquisitive question apparent with the raise of his brow.

"we have plenty of roses in our gardens." he says, as though like giving him... these is the most bizarre phenomenon in his life.

it seems like he feels the need to add. "we grow them."

you smile, the sweet thing awfully tight on your face. "they're for you," you explain. a little perturbed that you need to in the first place, but it's riddle so you sorta understand?

riddle squints. "why?"

you blank. "like... like a gift, for you? you know. cause I want to."

then as if the slowness of the processing going on in his brain gradually speeds up. it's obvious he's probably realized the implications of your little gift from the jolt, then widened eyes who stare in disbelief.

riddle gulps. "for, me?" he asks stupidly.

your raised brows say yes.

it's almost hilarious when he accepts them gratefully and stares at them like you just sprouted a literal white rose from the ground, wrapped it in some fancy plastic, and then handed it to him with a smile.

silence ensues again. riddle notices, screeches in his head to do something about it except he can't, cause his mind seems to be broken right now and he can't exert any words but a stammer.

and he'd really like to relearn how to speak because you're fidgeting on the spot, clearly nervous by his silence.

"sorry," you chuckle. "um.. it's just red roses, not white, or blue, or pink—"

"no!" he blurts out far too quickly. hands stretched out in the air a little as though reaching out to stop you but then stiffly staying by his side. riddle clears his throat. "I mean... this is... very important to me."

you look like you don't really believe him cause he was going off about roses in his dorm before.

he flushes, away from your gaze. "because its from you."

you can barely see azul.

or gauge out his reaction if it's supposed to be good or bad, because you can barely even see his eyes from all the sudden sheen of white over it. did all the smoke in the room just gravitate over his glasses conveniently or something?

you can spot the joints in his fingers twitching but oddly enough he remains stiff in front of you. uncharacteristically silent, which wouldn't really lead to good things.

"hello?" with your free hand, devoid of any flowers with the power of freezing a person. you wave it in front of his face which seems to have done a pretty good job with snapping him out of whatever trance he's in.

the glasses slip down the bridge of his nose but he fixes them at record speed. admittedly with clammy fingers.

azul coughs. "thank you very much." he clutches them tighter, pursuing his lips.

"I know octavinelle is not the best place for warmer places," he starts and a flash of confusion on your face is something he misses. "but I will manage it and find an accommodation for these, around 34 or 35 degrees."

your brows furrow. what.

"hmm yes... a nice vase, I'll use the most pure water there is." he rants. "then I'll fill it up with two thirds of its container and make sure it lives healthy."

that's... concerning.

"I'll have jade clean it regularly." he says and you're honestly more scared for the flowers. "I cannot trust floyd either so I'll trim it by two centimeters at the right angle occasionally when it dries."

he says all that, with a pink face.

you awkwardly stand there taking in azuls apparent plans on how to ensure the lifespan of your 'thoughtful' gift will be extended as far as he can help in to commerce your honor.

[antiloreolympus]

What is LO Cooking?!

I heard Lore Olympus was ending soon, so I caught up, and wow, it somehow got worse. The main thing I'm stuck on is Hera being the fertility goddess.

I don't know about y'all, but this is NOT the same person. But I assume this is for the reveal to be a 'surprise'.

((If you have to switch up a character's whole look and remove their only "unique" trait (mole) for a surprise, maybe don't do it.))

To continue, while this recent episode (273) depicts Zeus as awful for using Hera's powers. It also doesn't explain why Metis couldn't fight Kronos herself.

I haven't read the fast pass, but I'm going to make an educated guess that Hera is going to solo Kronos easily like Persephone did.

If this is the case, wouldn't that mean Metis was powerful enough to stop Kronos on her own, and she simply chose not to? Not only that, but she and Hera could've teamed up him if they were this powerful on their own.

It's very odd how this story wants me to believe Zeus did this only out of greed and not necessity if even Metis can't handle Kronos.

Also, Metis not only didn't take Kronos out but kept the truth from Hera? The blame is instead shifted to Zeus as if Metis didn't have the responsibility of telling her daughter.

If the story is willing to critique Demeter for lying to Persephone, why isn't Metis getting the same heat story wise?

This isn't me saying Zeus is justified using Hera's powers post-titanomachy as that is unacceptable (RIP Zeus Stans). Only in the context of defeating Kronos.

It just feels like another way for Metis to be seen as a "caring mom" as if she didn't sleep with Young Zeus, knowing two of her kids had a crush on him.

- - -

The potential reasons I have are between:

"RS didn't think this through and made Metis such a terrible mother that most of the aftermath could've been prevented if she had either fought Kronos on her own or taught Hera how to use her powers."

Or

"Hera (and Metis to an extent) wouldn't have been able to use the full extent of their abilities without a man using them as a battery first."

Both of these are terrible, and I hate it here.

[hchano]

my second contribution to the binary stars zine.

sadly the fic, WHICH IS RLY GOOD, never got posted [long story, not mine to tell ;u;] but this was a telepath!keith/blind!shiro AU. basically keith is a captured BoM, and is sent to the arena in chains to be executed by a beast, but then a blind galra is thrown in to the arena was well, with a weapon. keith is able to convince him they can work together and using his telepathic link, shiro is able to defeat the beast.

afterward, they are thrown together more often in the arena and over time keith learns shiro is actually a human who has been experimented on and altered heavily. he also ends up teaching him about galra culture and how to navigate some of the wierd shit galra go thru [since shiro is experiencing a lot of galra instincts lol].

meanwhile the BoM are working on freeing keith, but keith will not leave without shiro :')

so in this scene, we have keith tracing coordinates on shiro's back, in hopes that he will be able to use them to escape. i do hope viper posts this fic one day but if not, just know it was rly good and liek the perfect slowburn.

extras under the cut!

so as i keep saying this was a rly good fic. i had like 5 diff scenes i rly wanted to draw but i realized i was NOT going to be able to fit any of them into only 3 pages lol… that didn't stop me from TRYING more than once tho…

attempt #1, 3 pics:

this scene is them bathing [PLATONICALLY] after a round in the arena. keith is lamenting about shiro geting hurt due to keith's reckless fighitng style leaking into shiro thru the mind meld, and thinks about how shiro still moves like he has his human body too, which shiro picks up on thanks to the mind link [which is something of a habit at this point lol]. shiro is angsting about the fact he actually dosen't know the extent of what has been done to him thanks to the injury that blinded him, and after asking to see how he looked as a human, keith ends up reassuring him that he's still a cutie lol.

the page with the dialogue only is when i realized there was no way i was fitting that scene into 3 pages lol.

attempt #2:

this scene is basically near the start to the fic. keith is brought in to the arena and chained to a pylon. he hears a bunch of rly loud monster noises and pounding at the door across the arena and is like, wow i am actually fucked 8D then shiro is brought in and thrown to the ground, along with a weapon. keith watches him try to feel around for the weapon and realizes he's blind, then calls out to him. shiro immediately goes into attack mode but keith is able to convince him that they can be allies, and briefly explains he's a telepath before melding their minds so that shiro can see through his eyes, and after a bit of clumsiness they are able to beat the beast this way :D

my designs for the boys. i have unclothed versions too that show off all their markings and scars but i feel like that would get the post flagged so these will have to do lol. i did post them on twitter tho, if you wanna bother looking there. also yes, this design is rly similar to the other contribution i did for this zine, which is because i rly like the idea of keith having these specific markings LOL. this is p much my official go to glara!keith design.

just two lil chibi guys

i actually finished this with shading, but for the life of me cannot find it, so old phone pic it is. this is post-fic, after shiro joins the bom. [so uh not so shocking spoiler, they both survive and escape lol]

[transmutationisms]

I was reading your porn addiction post, and I just wondering what you consider addiction if not some sort of disease? I also think porn addiction and stuff in that vein is fake but I also can’t think that addiction is just people choosing to be that way even though they hate it. I say this as someone who was actually addicted to substances like I feel like there was something going on there that can’t be explained by the idea that addicts just choose to be like that. (I don’t think you think addicts just choose to be like that I just don’t really know any alternative schools of thought lol) I don’t mean this in an accusatory way I’m sorry if it comes off that way, I am genuinely curious what you think cause your posts are always so enlightening.

first of all you have to keep in mind that 'addiction' has no singular meaning. even if we confine ourselves to talking about psychoactive substances, 'addiction' can range from the 'classic' case of increasing, compulsive, self-destructive use, to cases where a person's usage may actually be stable in the long term but they're chemically dependent on the substance (think: the way doctors talk about chronic pain patients who are dependent on opioid painkillers; then compare to how they talk about psychiatric patients who are dependent on SSRIs. for example). you can get dx'd with a 'substance use disorder' purely on the basis of how much you take/consume, even if you don't feel it's causing impairment in your life, particularly if you let slip that someone else in your life has expressed concern or tried to stop you. race and class contribute to distinctions here as well, where certain people have leeway to be seen (even in a psychiatric setting!) as 'experimenting' with substances, or using them 'recreationally', where the same usage pattern in a person who's otherwise marginalised might be flagged as 'addictive' and in need of intervention. all of this gets even messier when psychiatrists and physicians try to justify applying discourses of 'addiction' to eating, gambling, sex, social media, and so forth. recall that 'addiction' in the roman republic and middle ages had contested legal and augural meanings that could be positive as well as negative, and that by the seventeenth century it was largely used as a reflexive verb with a predominantly positive meaning—as in, "we sincerely addict ourselves to almighty god" (thomas fuller, 1655) or, of plato, "he addicted himself to the discipline of pythagoras" (thomas hearne, 1698). it was not until the twentieth century that "addict" came to be widely used as a noun defining people who were passively suffering on a medical model.

i don't mean to be evasive here but to point out that asking "how do we define addiction besides a disease model?" presumes already that the disease model is the singular and inescapable way of understanding addiction in the first place—this is not true historically or presently. addiction is a muddled concept and has always involved moral discourses; attempts to present it as a 'pure' or 'objective' medico-scientific judgment are in fact recent and still unstable.

to the extent that it is useful to talk about addiction as a disease—that is, as a state of suffering that is imposed upon the sufferer, that is a disruption of a desired state of health and well-being—i think it is critical to keep in mind that such a disease is social as much as biological. you can start here by pointing out that substance use is often precipitated by the necessity of withstanding miserable life conditions (ranging from extreme poverty, domestic abuse, social marginalisation, &c, to the 'standard', inherently alienating and miserable conditions anyone endures in capitalist society). but there are other social factors that contribute to the presentation of substance use as compulsive, escalating, and self-endangering. eg, lack of a safe, steady supply is a huge factor here! when people are forced to rely on inconsistent, unregulated supplies to get high, this contributes greatly to drug 'binge' behaviours and endangers users. there is also the fact that drug users are often already marginalised (esp along lines of race, class, ability, &c) and are then further marginalised on the basis of being drug users. what would substance use look like in a society where using didn't relegate people to the social margins, or render them socially disposable? what if people had social supports, and weren't forced to toil away their entire lives at jobs that make them miserable for pay that's barely enough to live on? what sorts of patterns of substance use would we see then? so then, is it the drugs themselves that are the problem here, purely neurobiologically? or is there a larger story to tell about how people come to exist in such a state where substance use is increasingly hard for them to engage in with safeguards; where being a substance user causes them to lose whatever degree of social connection and support they may have had, which was often insufficient already; where they are often unable to integrate substance use into a full and connected life because they are told they must either give up enjoyment of a substance entirely, or be continually branded 'relapsing', 'non-compliant', 'dangerous', &c &c.....?

at the end of the day i don't think it's helpful or accurate to talk about addiction as a disease because it decontextualises drug use from all of these factors: why people do it, why it becomes harmful for some, why it's assumed we must simply 'stop' and 'resist' in order to 'get better'. disease explanations blame the substances themselves on a reductive bio-mechanical level (& again, this becomes especially untenable philosophically when we think at all about 'behavioural addictions'). the point here isn't to say that addicts are just blithely waltzing into addiction—or, indeed, to say that drug use is intrinsically a bad thing that should be avoided! it's a pretty typical feature of human existence that many of us enjoy consuming substances that alter our mental and physical states, and that's not inherently bad. when i push back against a disease model of addiction, i'm not invoking a model of personal responsibility or individual choice. i'm asking how we can understand drug use within a much broader social and historically contextualised frame, and how that can help people who are in many different states wrt drugs, from 'currently engaging in patterns of usage that feel compulsive and terrible' to 'never done a drug in their life'.

[runnning-outof-time]

Better Than the Dream | Tommy Shelby x Reader

Request: yes by anonymous

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x reader

Summary: After meeting in France, (Y/N) (Y/L/N) and Tommy Shelby were certain that they'd never see each other again...until one fateful moment has Tommy dreaming of her, or maybe he's not dreaming at all.

Warnings: language, mentions of drinking, talk of war, injuries, blood, hospitals

Word Count: 3388

A/N: I….I’m not sure how I feel about this one…as I was finishing it, I realized that it was like my other story ‘Called to Serve’, even though there are some differences to the story. I decided to set it after Tommy’s injury in season 2. Enjoy! :)

A/N 2: also I’m sorry this is being posted late…I didn’t have much time to get it edited today.

PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!

Comment/Message me if you’d like to be tagged in future stories similar to this one!

"Would you stop fucking wincing? You're gonna get that bloody thing stuck into me hand as well," Tommy grumbled as he continued to hold down pressure on his fellow soldier's hand so that he wouldn't bleed out anymore than he had already.

"I'm trying me best, Sergeant Major...it really fucking stings though," Donny, the unfortunate one who'd gotten barbed wire stuck in his hand while their company was on overhaul, responded, the second half of his words coming out like a hiss as he winced yet again.

The curtain that was separating the bed and chair these two men were occupying moved before Tommy could say anything else. From behind it came a woman, dressed in a nurse's outfit with a clipboard in her hands. "Donald White?" she asked as she looked up from the papers, a polite smile on her face.

"That'd be me," Donny responded, raising his good hand as he spoke, "me Sergeant Major's come with me...he needed to make sure the bleeding was controlled," he added then, explaining the other man's presence.

"Hi," she sent a nod and a smile in his direction, almost immediately noticing the pair of ocean blue eyes he had. She had to look back at the patient so that she didn't get sucked into them. "What's happened here?" she asked then, focusing on the injury.

"We were doing overhaul and I got this section of barbed wire stuck in me hand. Most of it was able to be removed, but there's still some left inside," Donny explained. Tommy let go of the cloth he'd been applying pressure to so that Donny could unwrap it and show the nurse the extent of the injury.

The woman nodded almost immediately after seeing the damage that had been done. It was pretty obvious that there was at least one barb and some wire still stuck in his palm. "I'm going to get the doctor to come over...he'll be able to extract it," she explained the next steps of treatment as she went about writing some things down on the clipboard.

"You've an English accent," Donny pointed out, a bit of a smile forming on his face. Neither he, nor Tommy, were expecting to hear one in a French run hospital.

"I do," the nurse answered, laughing slightly.

"Where're ya from?" Donny asked.

"Solihull," she answered with a polite smile.

"Ahh, ok," Donny nodded.

"I'm going to get the doctor now so that he can have a look at your hand. My name's (Y/N), if you need anything," she addressed both of the soldiers then, sending them one last smile before she turned and exited the closed off area.

Donny turned to Tommy with a grin seconds after (Y/N) had exited the room they were in. "She's fuckin' gorgeous, ain't she?" he asked, nudging Tommy's arm with his good hand. Tommy finally brought his eyes away from the section of curtain (Y/N) had exited through to look at his comrade. He didn't have to say anything, because the second Donny saw his face, he was speaking again, "yeah, she is...got you too stunned to speak," he ragged on his superior like they were part of the same rank again, and all Tommy could do was roll his eyes.

He wasn't going to deny something that was as obvious as the light of day. Their company had been given a week-long reprieve, and even though they were only one day into it, Tommy knew that he wasn't going to see a woman that was more beautiful than her. So he kept his mouth shut and listened to Donny's goading, allowing him some time to soak it up while he was injured.

——

Tommy returned to the same wing that he'd left his fellow soldier in two days ago, keeping his eyes peeled for the woman who he couldn't seem to get out of his mind since she left the room the other day. He, thankfully, found her, standing at one of the nurse's stations at the end of the hall.

"(Y/N), isn't it?" he asked as he approached her, successfully getting her attention.

"It is," she answered as she turned to smile at him, "what is it, Sergeant Major? Are you looking for Donny?" she asked, her voice sounding like sweet music to his ears.

"I'm not...was looking for you actually," he answered her, not caring how straightforward he sounded.

(Y/N)'s eyes widened slightly out of surprise when she heard his statement. "Me?" she checked to make sure, tilting her head slightly to show her interest in the answer.

"Yeah," Tommy nodded, "I was wondering if you'd want to go out and get a drink after your shift's finished?" he boldly asked her. A more pronounced look of surprise formed on (Y/N)'s face. That immediately made Tommy backtrack, "that might have been a bit too forward of me. I haven't even asked if you have someone, or if you're busy."

"No, it's fine," (Y/N) brushed him off, "I quite like the confidence actually," she added then, flashing a smile and letting out a slight laugh.

"So you'd be willing to join me?" he asked her, allowing a smile to form on his face. Her laugh, much like her voice, was music to his ears.

(Y/N) nodded before giving a verbal answer, "yes. My shift finishes at the top of the hour."

"I'll meet you outside," Tommy suggested, making her nod again. He nodded back, showing that he was happy that the plans had been finalized, before he decided he'd let her get back to work. "Which room was Donny in actually?" he asked her after she'd taken a few steps away from him.

She turned around to smile at him. "So you weren't only here for me?" she decided to tease him slightly.

"No. Just figured I'd see him while I'm here," he grinned, loving her attitude and the fact that she was able to banter with him despite everything going on around them.

"He's four doors down," she told him, pointing past him down the hallway.

"Thank you," he said to her, nodding one last time before he turned and went to his comrade's room.

—

"Are you only here because of Donny?" (Y/N) asked once their laughter caused by a story Tommy had told trailed off. She had her head rested on her arm that was propped up on the bar, and she was giving Tommy her full attention.

"No," he shook his head, looking briefly down at his glass as he let out a soft scoff, "we were granted a week's leave and sent into town instead of home...someone thought it'd be less money to keep us close. Cheap bastards," he explained then, muttering the final two words under his breath.

"Donny's having a terrible week off then," she commented, remembering the man that had come into her ward the other day.

"He managed to do it while we were doing overhaul," he shared another detail about the accident with her.

"Tough luck," (Y/N) stated, shaking her head as a look of sympathy formed on her face.

"That's Donny for you," Tommy responded, chuckling slightly at the thought of his friend.

"So where do they have you staying?" she asked him then, moving their conversation to another topic.

"A boarding house in town," he answered before adding, "it's an absolute shit hole."

(Y/N) sent him a sympathetic smile before looking at the bar. "I don't have anyone," she said out of nowhere, her statement shifting the topic of conversation yet again.

"What?" Tommy asked her, his brows furrowed as he looked at her once more. He was confused by her sudden statement, unsure of how to link it to what they'd been talking about.

"You said before that you hadn't asked if I had someone...I don't," she filled him in, calling back to the statement that he'd made at the hospital. Tommy nodded his head in response to her statement and looked at his glass again. Silence fell between them for a moment before she spoke again: "do you have anyone?" she asked him, her question making his eyes snap to hers in seconds.

He looked her over, his brows slightly furrowed in surprise. He didn't expect her to ask such a question. But he wasn't going to waste time answering it. "No," he told her, shaking his head for extra measure.

(Y/N) felt her throat go dry at his answer. Am I really going to do this? she asked herself, taking a moment to think her choices over. "It might be a bit forward of me to ask this, but..." she trailed off, thinking over it again. Ah, why not? "Would you like to come home with me tonight?" she asked her question, rushing to get in: "it'd give you a chance to sleep in a proper bed," so that her intentions weren't that out there in the open.

Who could blame her though? Almost all of the men around her age living here had gone off to fight as well. There wasn't anyone left, and as much as she hated to admit it...she still had desires too. And the fact that Tommy was a good looking man greatly helped the cause.

Tommy looked her over again after hearing her proposition. A grin ghosted over his lips as he nodded his head slightly before answering, "I would like that."

His answer made the fire that (Y/N) had been feeling in her stomach since the moment he'd found her today begin to burn out of control. She couldn't help but exude a giggle, feeling giddy that her attempt had actually worked.

"Would you...want to get out of here now?" Tommy asked her then, trailing off in the middle of his sentence, but completing it before she could interject with anything.

"Yes," her answer was said in a breathless manner, but he heard her loud and clear, and the two left the bar after paying what they owed.

—

The door to the apartment was barely shut before Tommy had trapped (Y/N) in his arms. It was no secret what the two wanted from each other. The hand holding and shoulder brushing on the walk back made it rather clear. But still, his kiss took (Y/N)'s breath away, and the way that her hands were roaming his body made Tommy feel dizzy; something he hadn't felt with the women he'd been with before.

Every night for the rest of the week ended that way for Tommy and (Y/N). He would come to the hospital to check in on Donny and then would wait around for the rest of (Y/N)'s shift until she could leave. They'd go to the tavern for some drinks before winding up at her apartment again; where they'd end the night wrapped up in each others' arms.

It was a nice arrangement, one that lasted right up until Tommy came to the hospital at the end of the week. Donny was being released after his stay (his hand had thankfully healed without infection) and their unit was due to move onto another station. Which meant that it was time for Tommy and (Y/N) to say goodbye.

The two soldiers were walking down the hallway when (Y/N) exited one of the rooms she was cleaning. Her eyes immediately found Tommy, and they widened visibly. Without thinking, she backed up into the room in hopes that he wouldn't have seen her. But the knock on the door told her otherwise. Of course, she let him in.

"I wanted to say goodbye...before we shipped out to our next station," Tommy started, a solemn look on his face. Spending time with her this past week was the closest to normal he'd gotten in a long time.

"I appreciate that," (Y/N) answered, a sad smile forming on her face as her eyes met his for a moment. She didn't have it in her to hold his gaze for it might have made her start to cry.

"This past week was lovely, (Y/N)," he told her, taking her hands into his. "Thank you."

"I enjoyed it too," she answered, her heart squeezing as she admitted this. It was making the situation all the more real.

"C-can I kiss you one last time?" he asked her then, wanting to kick himself for how juvenile he sounded.

"Please," she breathed quicker than she would have liked, but the timing didn't phase Tommy. Upon hearing her answer, he dropped her hands and grabbed her cheeks, pulling her to him for one last head-spinning kiss. They broke away moments after, their foreheads finding each other. "Goodbye, Tommy," (Y/N) was the first to speak, and she hated that her voice cracked when she said these two words.

"Goodbye, (Y/N)," he repeated her farewell, lifting his head so that he could press his lips to her forehead before he dropped his hands from her completely.

They offered each other a sad smile before he exited the room, leaving her alone once again.

"So that's why you were coming to see me every bloody day, eh?" Donny questioned with a wide grin on his face once Tommy was back by his side.

"Fuck off, Donny," Tommy grumbled, not in the mood for the banter.

"Ahh, I get it. It's hard to leave," Donny commented, picking up the signals that Tommy was putting down.

The two walked out of the hospital then without saying another word to each other. Back inside, (Y/N) had to put a smile back onto her face before she re-entered the hallway, even though she was hurting because she knew she’d never see Tommy Shelby again.

——

—1921—

Tommy was slipping in and out of consciousness as he was carried by stretcher into the hospital. He couldn't remember much from the beating he’d gotten; just that Sabini had been standing over him, grinning, as one of his men aimed a revolver at him. The Italians then scattered after another weapon was fired, and Campbell became visible before he blacked out completely.

He knew he was at a hospital now. The blinding, overhead lights of the operating room easily gave it away. There were doctors working on him. He could just barely feel their prodding as they tried to figure out the extent of his injuries. Every inch of his body hurt. It hurt just to think, and he couldn’t bear it much longer. So he closed his eyes and allowed complete blackness to overtake him.

The room was much darker when Tommy woke again. He looked around as best as he could, trying to get familiar with his surroundings. Things were starting to come together when he felt something touch his cheek. He jerked his face away before quickly turning his head to see (Y/N) (Y/L/N) with a rag in her hands. She looked worried, but not put off by his sudden movement.

"You...you found me again?" Tommy stammered, his voice coming out in a hoarse whisper. It was slowly becoming apparent to him that he was in her apartment in France.

"You were attacked. They brought you here," she explained to him while dipping the rag into a bowl, "I need to get you cleaned up." He nodded and allowed her to continue on with what she was doing.

"Can I hold you again?" he asked after silence had been hanging between them for a few moments.

She looked around the room for a moment, which Tommy found odd. "You can," she then answered, and he wasted no time in opening his arms for her. She smiled before moving into them.

Tommy inhaled her scent as she settled in his arms. He found it odd that he couldn't really feel her, but he didn't think too much into it. He had her again. "Can I stay here with you forever?" he asked after they'd been still for a few minutes.

(Y/N) giggled as she heard his question. "I'm not sure if you'd be allowed to..." she trailed off, her smile a sight for his sore eyes.

"What do you mean?" he furrowed his brows, confused by her response.

"Wake up, Tommy," she said to him, her statement confusing him even more. In what way is that a response to my question? he wondered, but yet he couldn't ask her because she was speaking again, "Tommy..." this time her statement was accompanied with a slight shake.

Things got much brighter in the room then, so bright that it made Tommy squeeze his eyes shut. He couldn't handle the pain that it was causing in his head. When he opened his eyes again, everything was different. He was no longer in (Y/N)'s apartment, instead he was in what looked to be a rather large hospital room. He was laying down instead of sitting, and he didn't have his arms around the woman he couldn't seem to erase from his mind. But she was still in front of him.

"(Y/N)..." he said her name, his voice still groggy. He felt a heaviness in his hand and it made him glance down to find that he was holding hers. "Wha...how are you here?" he asked, his confusion apparent in his words.

"I'm your nurse, Tommy," she answered him, throwing the formalities out the window. She felt that they were past all of that.

"Are we still in France?" he asked her next. This hospital seemed to be in much better condition than the one he remembered meeting her in, but it was the only way he could make this make sense.

"No," she shook her head softly, a gentle smile on her face. This information made Tommy's brow furrowed in confusion. "I think you were having a dream, Tommy," (Y/N) spoke up when she noticed his expression.

"But you're still here..." he trailed off, voicing the part that he was most confused about. He was unsure in saying it though because he didn't want her to disappear when he admitted this observation.

"I moved from Solihull after a position opened up. I work here now," she explained to him, her answer making his confusion dissipate. He simply nodded at this new information, taking a moment to think about what it meant.

Silence fell between them after she finished speaking, and she took that as her go ahead to complete some of the tests that she was required to run.

Tommy was the one to speak after a few minutes had passed, "so you're in Birmingham for good now?" he questioned her, watching intently as she continued checking him.

"I am," she answered, not losing focus on what she was doing. Another period of silence began. (Y/N) waited until she was finished with her tasks before she looked at him again. "So the dream you had..." she started off, unsure of how she'd word the question that had been burning in her mind since he came to, "is me being here better, or worse?"

Tommy chuckled slightly at her question, "oh this is better, love. You being here now is way better than the dream," he told her, a grin tugging the corner of his lips upwards. (Y/N) smiled at his admission. "And this may be a bit straightforward, but I wanted to know if I could take you out for dinner?" he asked her then, not wanting to waste any more time in getting them reacquainted with each other, "if you don't have anyone, that is," he added to the end.

(Y/N) giggled slightly as his final statement made her think back to the first night they shared with each other. "I don't have anyone," she started, a smile forming on her face, "and I'd love to have dinner with you, but..." she trailed off then, biting on her bottom lip. Tommy sat up straighter as he waited intently for what she would say next. (Y/N) noticed this and couldn't help but smile as she delivered the rest of her statement, "we need to make sure you get healthy first."

Tagged: @mgcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @lilyrachelcassidy @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @december16-1991 @onlydeadcells @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @midnightmagpiemama @cillmequick @rangerelik @dandelionprints @letal-y-poetica @raincoffeeandfandoms @itscheybaby @gypsy-girl-08 @lora21 @insanitybyanothername @depxiety @dragons-are-my-favorite @acewritesfics @forgottenpeakywriter @cilliansangel @cljordan-imperium @areyenotfondofmelobster @little-diable

MASTERLIST

[approximateknowledge]

beater syndrome or: "why people misunderstand vriska and kirito for the same reason"

so a little while ago i made a random shitpost that ended me up with this image

^cursed entity

and it's come back to haunt me with ungogly revelations which i will now share because i have to it feels important

context: originally i was just gonna make a post about kirito, explaining how people misunderstand the character and *why* (and why it's completely understandable); but then i realised there was a real pattern here and the subconscious connection that led to the above cursed image suddenly made sense in my mind

so here it is:

the reason kirito gets mischaracterised so often has entirely to do with the combination of:

a) most people only having watched the aincrad arc (&lt;;keyword watched),

and

b) the fact the anime gives a twisted image of the characters due to the fact the internal dialogues from the light novel get cut out completely

the end result of this is that when most people talk about "kirito", they're actually talking about "the beater", and those are crucially *not the same*!

the "beater" is a *role*, and a very specific one at that; it's what happens when you try to "own up" to accusations and unreasonable expectations (internal or external) to such an extent you're always playing the same self-destructive part, and because it's fundamentally a defense mechanism you just get stuck in it until things change drastically enough it finally feels safe to stop playing that horrible role and try to remember who you really are, after everything's over

that's what's happening here; when people say a character is "a kirito" they're actually referring to the beater, and the reason those characters suck ass is because they unironically use what's actually a coping mechanism in a horrible situation for a character's actual personality; of course it sucks! because they're doing it wrong!

it's about trying to convince yourself being a loner destructive scapegoat is "cool" despite always having a nagging insecurity it might just not be, but given the circumstances you're in too deep and so the sunk cost fallacy compels you to keep going

it's not *actually* cool; if anything it's depressing

now i think it's becoming obvious how all of this applies to vriska as well, but there's one crucial difference: the death game never actually *ends* for vriska serket; even now in post-canon she's arguably the *only* character who seems to still be playing sgrub, or maybe she never even stopped flarping

except for one version of her. for (vriska) the game did finally end. and they're the same

the beater dies when the game ends, and we see it happen to both of them

(also they're both transfem i didn't know how to fit that in but they are and that's a fact)

[shrimp-buffet]

LARRY & LAWRIE HEADCANNONS

Because they took over my brain after Kit betrayed me- (headcannons after the cut)

I’ve never really made one of these types of post before and don’t know if I’ll ever make more, but I just suddenly got struck with the need to share my ideas with these two and I don’t personally know people as into Brawl Stars as I am so making this post is the best way I could think of! Maybe if this gets received well I’m make more but no guarantees.

Anyway sorry for this pre-ramble, onto the actual headcannons:

Larry focused, Lawrie focused, Both

•Larry uses He/They pronouns, while Lawrie uses just They/Them

• Larry & Lawrie have a sort of Bluetooth-like connection between them. If one gets too far out of range, they both lose some or all of their functionality, which is why they’re never seen too far from each other.

•Their connection range is actually pretty generous, so they could go off and do their own things around the park. But they would still need to work around each other’s schedules to stay in range which can be a hassle, so it’s usually only on special occasions. (Much to Larry’s dismay)

•Larry is the much more social one, and while he does genuinely love spending time with his sibling, they desperately want to be able to spend more time hanging out with others on his own.

•Despite Larry’s extroverted nature he doesn’t actually have a lot of friends because they’re a bit of a buzzkil

•Lawrie tries (and usually fails) to hide it, but they’re extremely overprotective of Larry. Rushing into battles to protect him and following them around the park even if Larry asks them not to.

•for example of the previous: One time Larry was walking through the garden, thinking they were finally alone when Lawrie jumps in out of nowhere and just obliterates a bush having completed missed a little bunny. When Larry gets mad Lawrie explains that they thought there was a dangerous animal following him.

•Larry doesn’t get why Lawrie is so protective of him, but he is similar protective of R-T (albeit to a much smaller extent)

•Lawrie held a grudge on that bunny for embarrassing them. That specific bunny seems to intentionally menace them constantly and they consider it their enemy.

•While Lawrie is a bit of a tsundere about their brotherly love, they’re not one in general. They just genuinely dislike most people.

•The two of them fight, argue and insult each other a lot, but if anyone else saying anything rude to the other they both go sicko mode. Lawrie especially has no mercy.

•Lawrie punches people in the arm a lot. Totally unrelated, (/s) Larry’s arm is always sore

•Larry LOVES the Princess Diaries series! When they found out Fang also likes it (R-T told him) he spent a whole day binging the series with Fang in an empty theater

•As implied in the pervious, Larry occasionally gossips with R-T. He knows it’s wrong and feels guilty about it, but it’s too interesting for them to resist it.

•Lawrie has to keep tell R-T to stop gossiping, and Larry to stop enabling it. It doesn’t work but they try.

This is getting long so I’ll end it here. If you got this far thank you for reading!! Let me know if you’d be interested in other characters or even more of these two!

[caesarhamato22]

Hi thank you for accepting my request it was AMAZING!

if it’s ok, could I request another dk fanfic

IF NOT THEN ITS OK!!!!

but if yes how about some ANGST😈 (with happy ending tho😭)

so basically dk’s s/o ends up getting kidnapped while saving Mario and dk wasn’t around. And bowser decides to marry reader instead of peach and I don’t think dk’s happy bout that

Welcome back, lovely! I'm so glad you enjoyed the last request and OF COURSE you can request another one!!

I LOVE THIS IDEA!!! I need to get into some more angst fr

Taken: Pt 1/2

Donkey Kong X Fem!Reader

Summary: While in the middle of a battle, Donkey Kong is separated from you and comes back to find you've been taken by Bowser when you were saving Mario.

Warnings: Language, kidnapping, attempted forced marriage, details of injuries.

*In honour of hitting 50 followers, I wanted to make this one a bit longer for you guys <3*

*This is part 1 out of 2. I'll link part 2 once it's posted!*

*This is set outside the movie*

~

Headcanons:

Spoiler Warning: These headcanons include the first half of the oneshot.

• First things first, DK would definitely be hesitant with you joining the mission.

• He knows how capable you are and how well you can fight, but he couldn't help but worry about something going wrong.

• He knows Bowser has an interest in you, similar to his interest in Princess Peach.

• But it seems Bowser was going for you more often.

• Probably because he'd been obsessed with Peach for so long with no prevail.

• This made DK even more protective over you.

• It may have annoyed you to an extent but you knew he meant well.

• Throughout the battle, he would be watching you 24/7.

• After getting separated, he panicked and sprinted over to where he last saw you as soon as he got the chance.

• Finding out you were taken sent DK over the edge.

• And finding out that you were hurt in the process of saving Mario made him furious.

• He almost broke down.

• How was he going to get you back? Would you even be alive if he found you?

• Actually getting to you was the most stressful part.

• He wasn't sure what state you'd be in, even if it hadn't been that long.

• He went on a rampage to get to you once they got on Bowser's ship.

• The pure rage in his eyes almost scared Bowser for a second.

• But nothing could prepare DIK for the loss he was about to witness.

~

Mario had received word that Bowser was planning an attack on the Mushroom Kingdom. He was informed by some Toad Guards that a large group of Koopa Troopas had made camp just outside the kingdom's premises.

Since his brother, Luigi, was accompanying him at the time, they asked the guards to show them where the camp was.

After making their way into the forest, they all hid in the bushes and made notes on everything in the camp.

Almost twenty Koopa Troopas were setting up tents, sharpening weapons, looking over plans, but what Mario and Luigi noticed in particular was Bowser was nowhere to be seen. The Koopas were seemingly by themselves. Their karts were parked surrounding the camp, like a blockade.

Before they could be spotted, Mario, Luigi and the Toads retreated back to the Mushroom Kingdom to deliver the news to Princess Peach.

With the help of a new warp pipe created to connect Peach's home and the Jungle Kingdom, you and Donkey Kong made it to the meeting in no time.

~

"Bowser's back." Mario announced.

With the Koopa King returning, there was no doubt he'd be resuming his mission in kidnapping the Princess.

Or, potentially, yourself.

"The guards found a Koopa camp, just outside the kingdom." Mario explained. "They showed Lu and I everything. Their set up, their karts, and we even overheard their plans."

While standing around the circular map in the centre of the throne room, the group listened. "They mentioned an ambush. Happening either tomorrow or the day after." Luigi warned. Mario nodded along. "We didn't see Bowser but-"

"I thought you said he was back." Donkey Kong stopped him.

Mario quickly came to Luigi's aid. "That's what we heard the Koopas say. He's coming on the day of the ambush." He furrowed his brows.

He found it annoying how casually DK interrupted people, especially his brother. But, of course, Donkey Kong never dared to cut you off whenever you spoke.

"So, we don't know what day they'll be attacking? Or even when Bowser will get here?" You questioned. Being this uncertain on when the kingdom would be invaded would be a massive disadvantage for your team, and it worried you. Would it be late at night, early in the morning, or at the exact time that you sat down for lunch?

"Doesn't matter. Because we're-" Mario began.

"It matters, you know, a little." DK shrugged.

Toad and you glanced at each other, obviously having the same worries of the argument that could be taking place very shortly.

"Because we're going to stop them before they try anything." Mario raised his voice firmly. "If we crash their camp, destroy their supplies, and even their karts, they'll retreat."

"Then technically, they could be attacking right now, as we speak." Donkey Kong realised. Mario slowly turned his head and glared at the gorilla. "And we wouldn't even know, like, at all."

"Sometimes I wonder how, or better yet, why (Y/N) puts up with you."

"I get free rides." You answered, giving a shrug with your crossed arms. You knew the current topic was serious but you couldn't help but poke a little fun at the red plumber.

"And kart rides too." DK added with his smirk that infuriated Mario every time.

"OKAY, let's move on." Peach leaned against the map and began discussing their plan. "We want to stop them quickly. We'll sneak in tonight and stay hidden to destroy everything we can. If they spot us, we attack."

Everyone nodded, agreeing with her strategy.

"You guys are sure Bowser won't be there tonight?" She aimed her question at the Italian brothers.

"Well, he wasn't there when we were there." Luigi admitted.

"And he won't be there tonight." Mario guaranteed confidently with his fists on his hips. "The Koopas mentioned he'll arrive tomorrow, the earliest. It's best we attack A.S.A.P."

"But what if he's-" Toad raised a hand.

"He won't be! And if he is, we'll defeat him!" Mario practically begged everyone to side with him. He looked to Luigi for support. His brother hesitated for a moment but joined him regardless. A face full of fear turned to pure determination.

Mario's eyes softened when he locked them with Peach. He could see how she wasn't completely on board with the plan, and he understood why. She wanted to protect everyone. Every plan must be perfect.

But Mario felt it in his gut. This plan would work.

His gaze was a silent ask for permission, pleading for her trust. He wanted them all to trust him. He only ever wanted the best for his friends and family.

Yes, that includes Donkey Kong.

Peach thought it over and smiled at her companion.

Toad, as always, followed his princess's lead.

Then it came down to you and your stubborn boyfriend.

Glancing at each other, almost speaking telepathically. You may have trusted Mario but you definitely didn't trust this plan. Fighting the Koopa Troopa army was one thing, but fighting them and their boss, who also had the ability to breathe fire?

"I'm in." You smiled.

Truthfully, you worked better as a team. You joined your friends and Donkey Kong watched you. He was usually the one to rush into every battle the group came across, much to your dismay. Sure, you loved fighting alongside your lover and friends, but this fight could go a few different ways. And DK knew that.

He may be reckless, pretty much all the time, but this was different. Something felt off. This plan was risky, even for him. They weren't prepared for what they would face because they didn't know what they would be facing. All they could really do was improvise with the minimal time they were given and hope for the best.

As long as you were safe and he got to bash some Koopas, everything would be fine.

"Alright. I got nothing better to do than to save your butts. But if anything goes wrong, I'm blaming you." Donkey Kong pointed his finger an inch from Mario's face, to which the short man slapped his hand away.

"Sure, yeah, you can blame me. But you won't need to! Not unless we hurry up and attack."

It was strange seeing Mario so eager to prove himself. He wanted to show that trusting his gut was the right way to go, even if it meant rushing into a battle unprepared. It was unlike him.

Luigi had seen this side of Mario before when they were kids. But this is an entirely new situation that could end horribly if something unpredictable were to happen. He always trusted his brothers gut. That was how their plumbing business started, and look at them now!

Everyone dispersed and gathered what weapons they commonly used in battle. In the midst, Mario approached Donkey Kong after you had walked away.

"You really don't trust me, do you?" He asked offended.

"Not really, no." No hesitation. DK kept has back to Mario while he sorted the raid preparations.

"And I don't understand why. We heard the Koopas, we know their plan. What, do you think I'm making it up?" Mario couldn't lie, he was hurt.

"I'm joking. Yes, I trust you and I know you're not making it up. It's this plan I don't trust. And that's coming from me." DK gestured to himself after turning to the short man. "I've seen, and been apart of, battles my dad's army fought in. This might not be as dangerous as those, but it's still dangerous. And if anything happens to-"

"(Y/N) will be fine. I've seen her fight, she can handle herself!" Mario cut him off. It's true, you could fight. Why couldn't Donkey Kong believe in your abilities?

"I know she can fight, Mario, but that's not the point. The main part is we don't even know if Bowser won't be there. Remember how we almost died last time?" DK started to walk away on all fours with Mario trying to catch up to him.

"No one's dying tonight."

"And how do you know that?"

"Because if we go now, before Bowser gets there, we can stop their plans and potentially set them back weeks or even months!"

DK stopped and faced Mario, still slightly unimpressed.

"And I promise, (Y/N) will be okay."

DK watched him, scanning for any sign of a lie. But Mario was telling the truth. He fully believed this plan would succeed. And you were officially going too. So whether Donkey Kong liked it or not, the mission was going ahead. And he was coming along.

"Fine." He said begrudgingly. Mario smiled, thankful he could convince his friend to join him and trust him.

Now all he needed to do was stick to his promise.

How hard could that be?

~

You and the group silently stalked through the bushes surrounding the enemy camp. Donkey Kong stayed near you, as that's what he always did. Specifically in these situations.

The first thing they noticed was how many Koopas there were. And there looked a hell of a lot more than the twenty Mario mentioned. They gave each other a knowing look. This battle wouldn't be as easy as they thought.

Taking a peek through the bushes to where the others had gone, they saw Mario's expression was the same as theirs.

There weren't supposed to be this many. He was certain they'd be in and out in practically minutes.

There was still no sign of Bowser. Just soldiers, running around, still preparing. Their weapons were ready and their karts were loud yet parked.

As the Koopas were distracted, it was the perfect time to attack. They each took out lone soldiers but were eventually caught when one alerted everyone in the camp.

The adrenaline picked up fast as more Koopas came to fight. By having multiple soldiers fight each member of the group, it was easy for them to separate everyone, including you and DK.

While you focused on the shells, fists and spears thrown at you, DK tried to keep an eye out. His heart raced as it got increasingly harder to spot you through the crowd.

The amount of Koopas targeting you and your friends lessened, and it felt like it was almost over.

Then the wind picked up. The temperature had spiked.

You fought off three red-shell soldiers before they stopped and faced the sky. You took the opportunity to force them back with your weapon before looking upwards for yourself.

Your eyes widened, and you caught Mario doing the same.

"No... it's too soon." He whispered. Koopas dove down from the sky, more than any of you could take on your own. "He's not supposed to be here, yet."

You looked to the opening in Bowsers ship as it lowered itself near the ground. A large figure jumped out of the ship, landing without a scratch.

Bowser's menacing grin spotted your friends. His eyes land on you. A sickening smile greeted you.

"There you are."

You held your weapon tightly, perfecting your stance. He took a step towards you before being struck by Peach. Toad followed pursuit and attacked Bowser's legs as best he could. With this only doing as much as pestering him, he kicked back Peach's loyal subject, causing the princess to aim her poleaxe right at his face and neck.

Blocking her attacks, Bowser shot fire where she stood, not caring about her wellbeing as much as he did before. Thankfully, she jumped out of the way.

His main goal was you. Getting to you. Taking you.

Why not Peach? Did he finally give up after stalking her for so many years?

Mario and Luigi attempted to help, only to be held back by more Koopas exiting the ship.

The same for you and DK, the soldiers wouldn't let you interfere. They purposefully split you from the group, holding you arms back after disposing of your weapon.

"(Y/N)!" DK called. He pushed through the multiple shorter enemies who kept him occupied. "Let her go!"

While attempting to break free, you watched Mario sprint over near the Koopa King, putting all Bowser's attention on the himself.

Mario kicked him back, just slightly to daze him. He landed hits whenever he could, blocking any attack he could avoid. He fought proudly, before Bowser caught his body in his grasp.

"No powerups? Sad... you never stood a chance without them." He spoke so closely to Mario's face. A couple drops of sweat sat on his forehead as he clawed Bowser's hand, desperate to escape.

You witnessed the encounter and used all your strength to escape the Koopas hold. You kicked them back and retrieved your weapon from the ground and ran to Mario's aid.

Bowser talons grazed Mario's face, almost digging into his skin. Your friend hissed at the stings as blood rose to the surface.

Yelling a battle cry, you leaped in the air and kneed the side of Bowser's face. He dropped Mario and you landed in front of him, protecting your friend.

"Mario, move!" You ordered quickly.

He wanted to help, he desperately did. You couldn't be hurt in this battle, he made a promise that you wouldn't.

You blocked Bowser's blows and landed a few of your own while Mario still hadn't moved. You sliced Bowser's shoulder and he stumbled for a moment. You quickly turned to get Mario standing while he still frozen in shock.

"What are you doing?! Get out of-" Bowser swatted you out of the way and you fell to the ground. The Koopas launched a net around you and Bowser threw Mario back, breaking his trance.

"Let's move!" He called to his soldiers before locking eyes with you. "We got what we came for." You shook under the weight of the net and you were lifted and brought back to Bowser's ship. With your weapon back on the ground, you couldn't escape. As you pulled at the net and pleaded for them to let you go, Mario watched from below. Luigi met up with him, trying to get his brother to look at him.

You got on the ship, still in the net, as Bowser stomped over to you. He leaned down to be almost eye-level. You exhaled shakily, unable to look away.

"I've never gotten a good look at you, my dear." His voice was low and haunting. "And I'm hearing wedding bells."

~

All the remaining Koopas flew after the mothership, leaving the group to watch as one of their own was taken. Yet, half of them didn't know . One of which being Donkey Kong.

Mario had silent tears staining his cheeks as his friends came together.

Donkey Kong ran on all fours and caught sight of the ship leaving. For a second, he was joyful. The plan worked! They retreated! Why couldn't he hear cheers?

His eyes darted around to find you. He found Princess Peach, instead. "Peach, are they gone?"

"I think so. Hopefully." She panted as she watched the ship leave.

"Have you seen (Y/N)?" He asked. Peach looked at him, then scanned the area. You were nowhere to be seen. After she didn't answer immediately, he looked at Toad. His short friend just shrugged with worry in his eyes as he turned to search for you as well.

Donkey Kong walked over to the Italian brothers and asked Luigi.

"Where's (Y/N)?" He asked, internally begging Luigi count point you out. The green plumber stared at the gorilla before looking to Mario, who was facing away in guilt.

"Mario. Where's (Y/N)?" DK called him. Mario kept his back turned. DK didn't have any patience for this. He needed to know where you were. "Mario, where is she?" He asked firmly. His friend turned to him, a couple fresh tears dropped. DK was taken aback. His breath shook. He needed answers. And Mario wasn't giving them to him.

"Tell me where she is." DK ordered. Mario took a slight step back. Too much time has been wasted during this interaction and the ape grabbed Mario by the shoulders and shook him, forcing him to look into his eyes.

"Mario! Where is she?! Where's (Y/N)?!" He yelled. A growled settled in the back of his throat.

Mario was terrified. Donkey Kong had been mad at him before but it was usually over petty things like who won a silly contest. But these circumstances were much more dire.

"Bowser has her! She saved me and he took her!" Mario blocked his face as best he could, knowing that there could be a possible punch coming his way. But Donkey Kong just stopped. He stopped shaking Mario and stared at him, his vision slightly blurry from rage.

Did he just hear him correctly? No, he couldn't have. Surely not. You were somewhere here, on the ground, with him.

He looked to the ship as reality set in. You were... up there?

"No..." He gasped as he dropped Mario. The man landed with wobbly legs and backed up away from his friend.

As DK took a couple steps forward, he felt cold.

"No, no, no, no," he repeated over and over. His hands grasped his face. Slowly he went to his knees, unwilling to blink in case he lost sight of the ship.

Luigi placed a hand on Mario's shoulder. Mario looked to his brother and Luigi saw he was telling the truth. The ungodly truth.

Peach watched DK begin to shake and stand. He turned and faced Mario.

"Kong, I... I'm sorry I..." Mario couldn't find the words.

"She saved you, and now Bowser has her."

Mario fiddled with his overalls. He'd never recalled feeling such fear and guilt.

"That monster has (Y/N), doing who knows what, because she saved you." Donkey Kong stalking over to his friend, slowly, on his feet and fists.

"...DK, I didn't mean-" Mario stumbled over what to say.

"Didn't mean what? To- to lose the battle? To break your promise of everything being "fine"? Or you didn't mean to get (Y/N) captured because you were too busy watching your own plan fall apart?!" DK screamed at Mario. His eyes were almost red, with tears forming.

Mario had tears of his own as he raised an arm over his face, not knowing what lengths DK would go to to release his anger.

Peach stood in front of Mario, “(Y/N) saved Mario by choice. This is not his fault.” She argued. She knew DK was hurting, but they weren't going to get you back by screaming. DK stopped and glared at the princess.

“So you’re saying it’s (Y/N)’s fault?" He challenged, despite knowing that wasn't what she meant.

“No, that’s not what I’m saying.” Peach shook her head. "If we're going to blame anyone, blame Bowser. He took (Y/N)." She pointed to the ship.

DK glanced at the ship, his hard gaze weakened. Peach put a hand on his shoulder to make him turn around.

"And we're going to get her back."

DK watched her for a second, almost wanting a hug. But he didn't want a hug from Peach, or anyone, he wanted a hug from you. He wanted you in his arms, safe and sound. He glared at Mario as the guilty man kept his eyes on the gorilla warily.

DK slowly walked up to him. Everyone froze knowing he could snap at any moment. He stopped in front of Mario.

“If anything happens to her by the time we get there,” he spoke low at the level of a whisper. Mario didn't dare to look away. He noticed his friends voice almost shook, but DK remained steady. “I’m killing you.”

Mario knew Donkey Kong was telling the truth.

If you were hurt in any way, he was a dead man.

~

IT'S HERE!!!!!!

Yes, there will be a part 2! I didn't want you guys to have to wait any longer so here's the first part. Hope you enjoyed!

See you soon!

[pseudonymphomania]

"Shout Your Heart Out", the narrative compulsion of unrequited yearning, and the things that stick with me

How to do DiaLuci correctly: in the NB "Creating Records" WW, Diavolo takes many pictures of Lucifer as keepsakes, to Lucifer's resignation, until Lucifer takes the phone from him. Diavolo is a very extra person. He does things to their furthest extent and is a very goofy character despite his propensity for sound judgement in other matters. Lucifer taking the phone from him reestablishes Lucifer's agency. After a heart-to-heart, the skit culminates in Lucifer taking a selfie with Diavolo of his own volition, not because he is forced to, but because he cares for Diavolo as a friend. Lucifer gives Diavolo his phone back and taps him on the chest over his heart. The scene is a balanced reflection of the care these two have for each other in their different ways. The denouement [the final part of a narrative in which the strands of the plot are drawn together and matters are explained or resolved] is delicious, heartwarming, interpretable, logically sound.

How to do DiaLuci incorrectly: in "Shout Your Heart Out", Diavolo practices for weeks yelling about all the things he likes about Lucifer. His words leave little to be interpreted. He gets MC involved for no narratively compelling reason and despite having that quality time together, there is nothing much that sells even a friendship with MC aside from circumstantial presence. When it comes time for the event, Diavolo tells the world how much Lucifer means to him and how attractive he is (this is a romantic trope). Then the brothers stand there awkwardly commenting on this, including the object of the prince's affections, Lucifer, who says, paraphrased, "I don't care". Then, finally, after Diavolo confesses his love for Lucifer, he pulls MC on the stage and confesses to them and kisses them. (Denouement: ???)

I already made comments on someone else's post about my feelings regarding the card and despite an entire day passing and a real life to live and bills to pay, I couldn't get this out of my head.

I think I know why.

As much as I play this game to get the DiaLuci crumbs, this card left me feeling really hollow and sad. Canonically, Diavolo and Lucifer are best friends. This is exemplified by their first meeting (OG "Glory Days" Lucifer UR), their continued meetings as representatives from their respective realms (NB: Seven Apples" Diavolo UR), Diavolo's support to aid fallen Lucifer who asked him for help (Story Canon both games), their mutual regard as Devildom leaders (Role of Prince and Whip respectively in respective chapters), their affection for each other in general (little things like Lucifer offering to take half of the consequences in the past Christmas event because he couldnt let Diavolo take it on himself). This is explicit and textual. In this card, having Lucifer not give even a little bit of a shit is anti-character development.

The implicit is where the fans live; an interpretation of a written text is subject to the whims and tastes and biases of the perceiver. It is my pleasure to interpret them as a romantic relationship, a beautiful friendship, among everything they are and could be for each other. But.

But... to explicitly, in no uncertain terms, have Diavolo stop just shy of saying I Love You to Lucifer ("Shout Your Heart Out") and have the reaction to that be status quo indifference, then have Diavolo get washed by the narrative to remember the MC exists is some astronomically bad storytelling. Lucifer is a major poster-boy. Metaphysically, it's not possible to have him reciprocate because its an otome and he's a big money-maker (This is where the fans ignore the meta of the game and run with the interpretation of the text because it doesnt matter if something is canon or not in the grand scheme of things; DiaMC fans exist, LuciMC fans exist, Dialuci-polycule-sandwich fans exist, DiaLuci fans exist, ANTI-all-of-the-above exists).

Now, this card makes it explicitly textual that Diavolo is in a constant state of yearning (sad). This card makes MC the rebound (in a dating sim??). This card doesnt even have Lucifer react to the DiaMC kiss when Lucifer is supposed to be into MC. He's just there (Asmo got more screen time!). This is tragic for everyone involved. In a game about "romance", this card is an absolute travesty, and because of that I spent all day thinking about it like it was something of consequence in my busy life.

By comparing the two scenarios above, there is a very strong lesson here about the strength of a beautifully crafted narrative, so I am amiss as to why this card exists if not to commit to the ideas as written. (This is rhetorical; I know why)

Note: this is not an either-or situation. The DiaLuci and DiaMC plots CAN be done at the same time in one card, but it takes skill and a commitment to the kind of storytelling that is very hard to do with corporate and stakeholder meddling, deadlines, interprofessional and jurisdictional impudence, misunderstandings of market demographics and consumer behaviors, funneled into what is essentially a 4-koma Devilgram.

Am I still a hardcore DiaLuci shipper? Yes. Obviously. My personal denouement [headcanon] is that the love is requited. But poison can still smell delicious to a mouse before it kills it. *sighhhhh... saves the screenshot of Diavolo admiring Lucifer's attractiveness reluctantly* I just care about the value of a good story a little bit more because both DiaLuci and DiaMC were done so dirty here. 😭

Conclusion: the real winners are the cherry pickers who are able to make do with what little exists for them. The portentous winds say that I will become one.

Thank you for reading this and I hope you all have a wonderful day! 🥰

Edit: My opinion has been slightly changed because of a comment on my Reddit post by user Clarasiir. I appreciate that and I'm happy to have experienced a real life Hegelian Dialectic.

Edit 2: A kind reprise. The aftermath of the Devilgram.

[verdantcrimson]

11/26/23 Tsukisuta Skit

Akatsuki and Tsukasa have sweet potatoes!

Souma: Mmm, this is delectable! This sweet potato has been cooked to perfection! ♪

Keito: Yes, I think I'm getting the hang of this. ... Hm? Is that...?

Souma: Hasumi-dono? Is something the matter?

Keito: No, it's just that I saw something... Is that Suou?

Tsukasa: Oh! S- Sorry! I was just walking around and something smelled nice, so I simply had to see...

Kuro: Haha, so the scent lured ya in. I had some potatoes left over from cookin' so we're bakin' 'em... Did ya wanna join us?

Tsukasa: Baked sweet potatoes...! Is it alright if I do?

Souma: Most certainly! ... Wow, this is undeniably the best potato I have ever baked! Here, Suou, you may eat this one.

Tsukasa: Thank you very much! Munch munch... Mmm~ It's so sweet and delicious! ♪

Souma: I am happy to hear you think so. ♪

Keito: Oh? It looks as though you've been properly caring for your juniors when outside of AKATSUKI. I'm impressed.

Kuro: Right? I kept thinkin' of you like you were still a baby, but I'm glad to see you're all grown up.

Souma: Mu, is it not slightly rude of you to refer to me as a baby? In spite of how it may appear, I am actually the big brother of my dorm room!

Tsukasa: That's true. Kanzaki-senpai is always reliable and kind. Fufu, perhaps he inherited his kindness from his seniors in AKATSUKI.

Keito: ... You don't have to phrase it like that. It's sort of embarrassing.

Souma: Fumu, but it could be that Suou is correct to an extent. The two of you are extremely kind persons, and that is the reason for which you have my admiration!

Kuro: I- It's still embarrassin' when ya just say it to our face though...?

Keito: You're exaggerating, Kanzaki.

Souma: Not in the slightest. As a matter of fact, right now you just handed the largest of the sweet potatoes to myself and Suou without so much as a second thought. ♪

Tsukasa: Ah, I hadn't even noticed, my apologies! I just got so carried away in savoring the food...

Kuro: No sweat. Doesn't matter, as long as you guys are eatin' your fill.

Keito: Yes, what Kiryu said. ...Hm? Are you doing alright, Suou? You seem to be concerned about something.

Tsukasa: Ah, um... Please do not tell Sena-senpai about this. If you're going to post about it on social media, please just pretend I was never here.

Kuro: Uh,

Keito: Kiryu, what's wrong?

Kuro: ... I just posted a picture captioned 'Suou at the AKATSUKI sweet potato meetin' on my socials.

Souma: S- Suou has stopped breathing!?

Tsukasa: I- I have to somehow prove that that wasn't me...!

Keito: No, that's just completely impossible.

Souma: L- Let us not dwell! Eat this sweet potato and calm down!

Kuro: Yeah, that's right... What are ya tryin' to accomplish by stuffin' his mouth like that Kanzaki!?

Keito: You lot are seriously noisy. Listen, I'll properly explain everything to Sena, so don't worry too much.

Tsukasa: Uu... Thank you for being so considerate of me...

Souma: See, Hasumi-dono is indeed a kind person! ♪

Keito: Nngh...

Kuro: Hasumi danna, your face is totally red, ain't it?

Keito: ... SHUT UP, all of you! Just SHUT UP and EAT YOUR FOOD!!

End.

[pudgybun]

Rant about annoying transphobes in my inbox:

(edited with more details on how I experience gender)

If trans ppl who make every possible effort to "pass" as cis are the only trans ppl u respect then ur lame as fuck and I hope that with time you can learn to stop licking cis ppls boots 😁👍 It's rly annoying when I get hateful anons from ppl who claim to be transmasc saying I'm "just a girl looking for attention" like... I've been on T for over 5 years, I'm legally male, I socially transitioned as a CHILD so I've literally lived my entire life as a "man" (I don't even think of myself as a man. I'm 2spirit and think of myself as that. An uncle, a son, a brother, a boyfriend, a grandson, someone with memories of boyhood, one who feels at home amongst men and mascs... thus he/him. But someone who feels ties to femininity, someone who feels deep ties to women and who observes masculinity through the lense of feminity. Not a man, not a woman, 2spirit.) and passed for as long as I can remember but this is my FETISH blog where I explore aspects of bimbofication and feminization. It's not some "GOTCHA" moment to tell me I am dressing or look like a girl 😭 I did that on purpose!! Also, if I was wanting attention don't you think I'd just use she/her?? Women get wayyy more attention posting content than trans mascs and I literally lose sales and customers when they realize I'm not a cis woman 😭

It's just the dumbest take ever to think I'd use he/him for attention lmao. Also, I'm literally a porn creator. What do you want me to do? You want me to cover my natural curves to look more masc? You want me to buy new binders every time I gain a few pounds? BINDING IS UNCOMFORTABLE and the 3XL one I do have works but only to an extent! I don't think I should have to be physically uncomfortable and shrink wrapped just because some weirdos online think I'm doing transness wrong. Aside from that I'm literally getting my fucking baggg showing off my body why wouldn't I show my tits and make myself look pretty to make MONEY 😭

If you're a trans person moonlighting as a porn creator presenting in ways that don't "align" (whatever that means) to your gender identity just know I love you and you don't have to explain yourself to anyone, regardless of how many weirdos try and tell you about yourself while on anon lmao

[myguidingmoon-light]

“And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.” (Luke 2:7)

No room. That’s something I’ve heard too much lately. Palestinians have been hearing that for 75 years. Since they were driven out of their homes—more than 700 000 of them—in 1948 to make room for the colony of Israel, there has been less and less room every day. Less land, literally, as even though lines and walls have been drawn over the years, Israel continues to illegally settle in Palestinian land. Less room to breathe, as the population of Gaza grew within the illegal blockade walling them into a tiny strip of land. Less room to live now, as Gaza has been under constant attack by Israeli bombs and guns and while the civilians of Gaza are pushed by this violence into even smaller and smaller “safe zones” (though there is nowhere safe in Gaza right now).

But also no room our conversations. No room in our imagination. No room in our understanding of our world of “human rights” and “developed nations.” You’d think “Palestinian” is a slur for how quickly it shuts up (or heats up) dialogue. These are our neighbours, and it feels like pulling teeth to get people to engage with their humanity—let alone ask their MP to ask our government to ask Israel’s government to please stop bombing civilians for the third month straight.

Today we recognize when a Jewish Palestinian family was forced by the state to leave their home, shelter in unfit terrain, give birth without proper medical care, survive a massacre, and become refugees. We Christians call the baby born in that family Emmanuel, which means God with us. God was born in Bethlehem, behind the border wall, in an occupation. What does that tell us about who God is?

Our Christian siblings in Palestine have asked us not to let this Christmas pass as usual. To that, I ask, what is Christmas as usual? If we don’t see our neighbours in the story of Jesus, what is the point? If we need to put the real, genuine injustices of the world out of our mind so that we can be comforted by Christmas, we are frankly doing it wrong. The point—the whole point—is that love and justice are possible for the unloved and the oppressed, even when it doesn’t feel that way. It is our responsibility to make that happen, and we can’t do that with our eyes closed.

You should feel uncomfortable about celebrating Christmas while a genocide is going on. We need to have room for that. We also need to have room for the hope that Christmas represents. We need to have room in our hearts for justice, lasting peace, and a free Palestine, because we are all needed to make it a reality.

And for God’s sake, CEASEFIRE NOW!

“He has brought down the mighty from their thrones/ and exalted those of humble estate;/ he has filled the hungry with good things,/ and the rich he has sent away empty.” (Luke 1:52-53)

.

.

.

I am indebted to Rev. Munther Isaac for his wisdom in helping so many of us walk through this time. Personally, I just finished his book “The Other Side of the Wall”—if you are a Christian, you have to read this book. I’ll buy you a copy if you want.

I also want to note that this post isn’t really supposed to be an explainer or an argument. I didn’t cite anything here, but if you’re curious about anything I referenced (e.g. why did I bring up medical care?), send me a message and I’d be happy to give you more details about what’s happening in Palestine. I’m no expert, but I know some people just genuinely don’t know the extent of the injustice and don’t know where to learn more; if you have questions I’m happy to help, but I’m not here to fight with you.

Same deal if you want to help but don’t know how. I’m happy to give you some ideas and even help you out with them (distance permitting). One important action you can always take is contacting your Member of Parliament. You don’t have to write anything fancy—just tell them honestly how you’re feeling and ask them to support an urgent ceasefire. This is literally your right as a Canadian, so you don’t have to worry about doing something wrong.

[these-emo-thoughts]

Last Twilight Episode 11 thoughts

A lot of people are hating on Day right now but I get him. I do. And if you haven't watched episode 11 yet, maybe skip this post as it revolves around a major part of the plot. If you've watched the ep, you probably know what I'm talking about. More detail is under the cut.

Warning, this is a long one, lol. Apologies for any mistakes, I'm a bit sick and didn't read over it 🤣

If you've seen it already, I'm going to explain why I think Mhok and Day's break-up had to happen and why it is the best thing for them right now.

Mhok's fear of losing another person because he isn't there to help or pick up the phone is absolutely valid (and so real and relatable that I feel personally attacked). He doesn't stay with Day out of pity, which has been established multiple times throughout the series - but the trauma of what he went through with Rung and the fear of possibly repeating that again with Day has made his anxiety cloud his judgement and his heart. It's not a healthy way to live - constantly worrying about your partner, to the extent where you cannot live for yourself, is not sustainable for a relationship (I also find this quite ironic because up until this point Mhok has been on his own for a long time now). We saw the manifestation of this fear in episode 11 multiple times too, with Mhok leaving in the middle of the shift to check that the guest that was hit by a car wasn't Day, and then when he was freaking out when Day wasn't answering his phone. Imagine going through all of that, but this time, your partner is 15 hours away by plane.

Day choosing to break up with him is, in my opinion, more complex than just "he lied to me and pitied me". That's part of it (and will come back at the end of this post), yes, and he does have the right to be upset that Mhok lied to him. Again, it's not healthy for the both of them if they are going to continue a relationship. I also want to point out that Day is at a disadvantage here because while he is capable of living his life independently as a blind man, he can't actually see the emotions on people's faces when he talks to them and that's can be important for picking up what others are putting down. Day can't see the changes in Mhok's expression when his smile fades, he has to rely on the other to talk to him when something is up, so lying is a BIG no-no here (as it would be for any relationship). So far, they've done a great job at communicating, so this is presented as new issue - but, it's a big one. So yes, the lying is part of it, but it's not ALL of it.

"But what IS all of it!?" I hear you scream into the Tumblr void. Well, by now, OF COURSE Day knows that Mhok truly loves him and KNOWS that the other doesn't pity him - he's said so many times. So, Day must realise at this point - of which the timeline is probably at a year of them knowing each other, give or take - that Mhok is deliberately holding himself back from good opportunities because of that love. It must hurt like hell, knowing that you're the reason your partner is self-sabotaging, but there's nothing you can do to change their mind because everything is out of your control. It's so much easier for Day to say "Mhok pities me and lied to me and that's why I want to break up" instead of "I'm the reason Mhok won't go".

It's heartbreaking, but what's the solution here? Long distance? Sure, maybe - but that's not going to stop Mhok from worrying about Day and being distracted from his job. It's not going to stop Day from feeling like he's a burden to Mhok. Not only that, with timezones and such a huge distance, there are even more complications to worry about. Plus, let's say something DID happen to Day while Mhok was in Hawaii - it goes back to exactly the problem that Mhok had which is what can he do about it? Long distance is a solution, but how long will they last living like that?

"Okay emo, so why doesn't Day just go to Hawaii with Mhok? Then they can be together and Mhok can fulfil his promise to take him there and they don't have to break up and they'll live happily ever after." I see you!! But... that's a BIG decision. Mhok and Day's trip to Songkhla may have been a test to see how they weather the storm of living together as boyfriends, but it was only for a few days. And Day - for most of it - was alone in the room while Mhok was working. That's not a way for Day to live, and it still won't stop Mhok from being worried, probably even MORESO now because they're in a whole other country.

So... what's left?

Day's decision to break up with Mhok is heartbreaking, but is probably the only solution that makes sense to me. Mhok CANNOT live a life like this. He can't. It's already debilitating him and it'll get even worse if he's constantly prioritising Day over himself in every aspect of life. Of course a person should think about their partner, but not to the point where it becomes unhealthy self-sabotage. Day also cannot live happily like this. He's come to terms living with a disability and already is aware of how different his daily life is to that of a sighted person - but the little voice in the back of his mind, the one reminding him that he's the reason Mhok is not living his life to the fullest, is making the entire process more difficult for him (and the lying really doesn't help).

So... yeah. A necessary evil that unfortunately to many will be written off simply as the "episode 11 curse". An evil that has people already saying that Day is stupid and immature, when I really believe this is the most rational he's been. I know even the actors have said it's about the lying but this is P'Aof we're talking about here - he's a brilliant story-teller, and there's always more to his art than what we see on the surface. It's happened in other shows he's directed, which is why they rate so highly. Last Twilight is no exception, and the complexity of the love story between Mhok and Day is nothing short of a masterpiece. That's how I see it, anyway.

Would love to hear other thoughts and perspectives!

[fyodcrs]

BSD 111.5: A Complaint (again)

All right. So.

I have criticized the S5 finale extensively, and now that the manga is following the same storyline almost exactly, I feel I want to air my grievances one last time, because it's just so bad. At least in my humble yet correct opinion (to quote Fyodor from the BSD dub). And it only gets worse the more I think about it. 

The writing here is...not good. I’m talking about the big “Chuuya was never a vampire to begin with” reveal, the retconned hand injury and what absolute contrived nonsense that is - and most of all, I’m talking about Dazai’s speech about why he “won” the "game," and how it makes no actual sense because what he says happened is not what actually happened. 

All of this is stuff I've talked about in other posts (I'll be repeating myself a lot here), but I really want to focus on Dazai's speech and why I just. Don't like it.

"You don't trust anything you can't control," Dazai tells Fyodor.

This is supposed to be the reason Dazai "wins": because he trusts people, and Fyodor does not. He relies on others he considers friends; Fyodor just uses others that he considers pawns.

And this is fine in theory. Indeed, it's been heavily foreshadowed. Personally, I think "Dazai wins because he has friends, Fyodor loses because he doesn't" is a super boring way to go with both Fyodor's character and with the conflict between him and Dazai, but whatever, we all knew something like this would be the reason for the ADA's victory over the DOA. Theoretically, it makes sense.

Except, it doesn't actually work the way they did it. It doesn't work because Fyodor's plan apparently hinges on the vampires, and Fyodor does not actually have control over the vampires.

In fact, Fyodor does not have direct control over any aspect of the Decay of Angels plot.

Fukuchi does.

First of all, the Decay of Angels plot doesn't begin until after Fyodor is already in prison. Fyodor is not the one who writes on the Page, and Fyodor is not the one in possession of the Page. Fyodor is also not the one who is in possession of Bram. All of this falls to Fukuchi.

Now, there is one interesting scene where Fyodor tells Dazai that he "added a line to the page":

But - unless I have my timeline mixed up - since the Page was not stolen and used until after Fyodor was sent to prison, this only suggests he told Fukuchi what to write. There is still no point where he actually had possession of the Page himself.

Fyodor is the one who set up the entire plot and arranged for all the pieces to be in place, but once it actually starts to unfold, he is no longer in a position to directly manipulate his pawns, because he's locked up underground thousands of miles away.

Of course, this does not mean he has been removed from play entirely; he is still communicating with the outside, and he is still able to manipulate the course of events to some extent, as we see when he (somehow; it's never explained) killed the pilots so Fukuchi could get his hands on the One Order:

But how is this any different from what Dazai is doing? Dazai lets himself be captured and locked away, too, to keep an eye on Fyodor and read his moves as things unfold on the outside. He is also in communication with his allies, and he is also able to do some string-pulling, as we see when he stops Fyodor's assassination attempt on Fitzgerald and the neutralization of the Eyes of God:

Basically, both Fyodor and Dazai have the same level of control over what is happening.

Dazai being superior to Fyodor because he "simply had faith" in Ranpo (and the rest of the ADA) implies that Fyodor did not have faith in Fukuchi. But that implies that Fyodor had some means of direct control over Fukuchi throughout the unfolding of the DOA plan and therefore did not have to leave anything solely in Fukuchi's hands. Or it implies that Fyodor had a plan independent of Fukuchi. Except he didn't. On both accounts. At least not that we know of.

In fact, in the anime (which I assume will be repeated in the manga in later chapters), Fukuchi says that Fyodor didn't have any direct control. Fukuchi tells Fukuzawa that he had Fyodor sent to prison for the purpose of preventing him from interfering in Fukuchi's actual plan. And Fyodor agreed to this. He got himself arrested on purpose. The reason he does this is suggested to be that the prison is essentially the safest hideout in the world. Except Fukuchi tells us that this action also severely hindered - though not outright neutralized - Fyodor's ability to influence events.

And I'm not trying to downplay Fyodor as the spider at the center of a complex web of manipulation, not at all. I'm simply pointing out that: a) Dazai is exactly the same, and is countering Fyodor move-for-move, and b) the plan still heavily relies on Fukuchi's independent actions.

As I mentioned, the DOA plot doesn't begin until after Fyodor is arrested and sent to Meursault. Fyodor was using vampires planted as guards as his means of communication (which doesn't even make sense itself, because when exactly would this have happened? When does Fyodor communicate with these vamps? Why did Dazai not notice this?), but Fyodor himself is not controlling those guards, Fukuchi is. Because Fukuchi is the one in control of Bram, and the vampires can only be controlled through Bram. It is certainly conceivable that Fyodor might have had these guards planted before his arrest, but the vampires are only usable as pawns as long as Fukuchi has control of Bram, or at least as long as Bram isn't in control of himself.

Using Chuuya as a pawn also requires Fukuchi to be in control of Bram. Therefore, Fyodor's entire escape plan relies on Fukuchi.

Fyodor literally cannot do anything with the vampires without Fukuchi. And if his entire plan rested on the vampires, that means his entire plan rested on Fukuchi.

In other words, Fyodor's entire plan rests on him having faith in Fukuchi.

It doesn't matter that Fyodor and Fukuchi are not "friends"; it doesn't matter that Fyodor thinks of Fukuchi as a "pawn" instead of an "ally" (although I should note we've been given no evidence of this, because we have never actually seen them interact and we don't know their relationship; we're just meant to assume this). The point is that Fyodor structured this plan of his to be centered around the actions of someone else. This is no different from Dazai. In fact, this is how the both of them usually operate. They just tend to have different ways of going about manipulating their "pawns"/"allies."

Then there's the "hand full of uncertainties" line:

How, exactly, was Dazai's hand "full of uncertainties" in a way that Fyodor's wasn't? How exactly did Fyodor have "the world in the palm of his hand" in a way that Dazai didn't? How exactly was Fyodor in more control of what was happening than Dazai was? As I've already pointed out, what we've been shown suggests they both had equal measures of influence on the outside, and therefore equal levels of manipulative power and equal amounts of uncertainties.

In fact, if we are to believe that Fyodor was surprised by Nikolai and Sigma, that was a whole hell of a lot of uncertainties being thrown at him. And just like Dazai, he just ran with it.

And the reality is that Dazai actually had a whole hell of a lot less uncertainties than Fyodor did, and a whole hell of a lot more control, because Chuuya was never a vampire to begin with. The moment Chuuya arrived, Dazai had the upper hand. It's not like he was ever in any actual danger from the point Chuuya showed up. He was in full control of the situation from that point on.

And you can say that's the whole point, Dazai was in control because he had an ally, but the point I'm making is that the only control Fyodor thought he had over the situation was also because of an ally that he believed he had. If he believed he was controlling Chuuya, he also had to believe that Fukuchi still had Bram and was still on his side. He was operating on faith in pretty much the exact same way Dazai was.

You can also argue that Chuuya showing up was proof for Fyodor that Fukuchi was still in control of Bram (even though he wasn't by that point) and that things were going according to plan. But I'd counter-argue that if at any point before Fyodor managed to escape Bram had had his will restored, Fyodor would have been fucked (had Chuuya actually been a vampire). The very act of using Chuuya as a pawn was a huge act of faith on Fyodor's part.

It's important to stress here that Fukuchi was not under Fyodor's "control" at any point, at least not so far as we've been shown. He is not brainwashed like Nathaniel. He is also not a throwaway piece. He is vital to the plan. And he has his own motivations. We aren't quite there yet in the manga, but we know from the anime what Fukuchi actually wanted, and we also know from the anime that Fyodor approached Fukuchi and propositioned him. They made a deal. Of course, Fyodor always had his own plan, but he knew what Fukuchi's real motivations were. Even so, he trusted that Fukuchi would carry out the plan as he instructed, at least so far as we've been shown.

The argument can be made that Fyodor doesn’t actually have any trust in Fukuchi, he simply trusts that he knows exactly how Fukuchi will act and that everything will go as he predicted. But how is that any different from Dazai? Ranpo negotiating with Bram and Bram ordering the vampires to attack Fyodor might not have been something Dazai and Ranpo set up beforehand, but it is certainly something Dazai planned for, because he purposefully set Fyodor up to be in a vulnerable position, anticipating that exact scenario. Again, they are both operating in the same exact way: not directly controlling their allies, but assuming that their allies will act as they expect. The only difference is that Fyodor’s “allies” did not meet his expectations and Dazai’s did.

I get that the point of this is supposed to be that Fyodor is undone by his cruel manipulation of others and his ruthless attempts to impose his own order upon the world. And that's fine. It's good, even!

The problem is...that's not what happened. Fyodor lost because he relied on something that was outside of his direct control: the vampires. Fyodor lost because he put too much control in the hands of Fukuchi.

And this in itself is a problem, because Fyodor should not have so heavily relied on Fukuchi. All of this would work for me just fine if everything didn't revolve around the goddamn vampires. You cannot have Fyodor's entire fucking plan hinge on the vampires, over which only Bram and the person who has possession of Bram have any control, and then try and tell me that Fyodor lost because he didn't have faith in people. Why would he use the vampires at all if he had no faith in Fukuchi?? Why would he get into a helicopter with the vampires piloting if he had no faith Fukuchi was still his ally and Bram was still under Fukuchi's control?? Why would he have agreed to go to prison in the first place if he had no trust in Fukuchi????? It doesn't make any sense.

And don’t try to tell me, “Well, Fyodor’s just arrogant.” That is the laziest fucking excuse you could possibly give to justify why Fyodor’s IQ points have been cut in half this arc. And, for the thousandth time I ask—how is this any different from Dazai, who also just assumed everything would go his way? Why is it "faith" when it's Dazai but it's arrogance when it's Fyodor?

Personally, I think BSD made a massive narrative mistake in putting Fyodor and Dazai in Meursault in the first place. It's over-complicated things.

Also, one thing that really bothers me about all this is that it's supposed to be a big character moment for Dazai, but...I don't see how this is any different from how he usually operates. Hell, this ruse Dazai and Chuuya set up is even something that SKK did before when they were a team in the Mafia. We've seen Dazai do this shit a thousand times. What's supposed to be the big deal here? The fact that he made a friendship speech this time?

It's just fallen really flat to me, and that's a bummer because I think Dazai is one of the most well-written and interesting characters I've ever come across, and I want to see great character development for him.

I've complained endlessly about Chuuya being in a Halloween costume the entire time so I'll just say here that it's really fucking dumb that Fyodor just. Didn't notice. That he was fooled by fake fangs and contact lenses. Dazai would have noticed, if their roles were reversed. Ranpo would have noticed. It really is just a case of Fyodor being made stupid out of nowhere so Dazai could win.

The retconned hand injury is also incredibly dumb, because first of all, in the manga it didn't exist until the last two chapters when it needed to exist. And second of all, the hand is clearly shown to be usable after the incident that is supposed to have injured it so severely that Fyodor needs the vampires - who, again, are not under his direct control - to pilot the helicopter so he can escape, and this is true for both the manga and the anime. It conveniently only becomes a problem when Dazai needs it to. Because plot, I guess. Because the universe is chaos unless Dazai is pulling another deus ex machina.

I really hate being so critical and so negative, especially about BSD, because it's been my favorite series for years now. But ever since the S5 finale I've been finding more and more things about this arc and it's conclusion (?) that make no sense to me. And considering that Fyodor and Dazai are my favorite characters and a large part of the reason I'm invested in this story, to see them both so poorly handled has left a very bad taste in my mouth.

In conclusion: