#tony is literally me trying to draw at this point

[lilbitofmac]

Stephen doesn’t understand the most important rule of being a boyfriend: your hoodies don’t belong to you anymore.

[thevillainswhore]

Perverse Desires

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

Word Count: 4k

Summary: Assigned an undercover mission, you’re partnered up with the bane of your existence, Bucky, to pay a visit to a s-ex club. What could go wrong?

Warnings: Smut (s-ex club, oral f receiving, f-ingering, nipple play, voyeruism, exhibitionism, degradation)

A/N: unbeta’d, dividers by saradika

Um, idk where this came from tbh, enjoy tho x

“Are you sure I’m the right person for this, Cap?”

The mission brief Steve handed over to you had stunned you in all honesty. You had been on numerous undercover missions for the team in the past, so there was no doubt in your mind or anyone else’s that you were capable for the job. It was your speciality - having a knack for being precise with discrete sufficiency and perfect timing to be able to get in and get out without making a fuss. But, this was totally new, even for you.

“Agent, I have no concern whether you’re fit for this job. I know it’s… different.” Steve clears his throat and you know this is as awkward for him as it is for you. “But, you were highly recommended and you have a- um, how d-do I say this? You, er-“

Tony interrupts Steve’s rambling from his seat in the corner of the office you were all situated in, decidingly having enough of watching his co-worker stumble from embarrassment.

“What Captain prude is trying to say, sweetheart, is that you have the right look for the job - great features, killer body - y’know? You’ll draw the target out no problem.” He finishes his explanation by throwing a wink paired with a smug smirk at Steve’s flushed cheeks.

“Yes. Thank you, Tony.” The grimace on Steve’s face has you desperate to laugh at his unease, but you manage to keep it in, eager to get out of this office soon as possible. “Your skills and experience are also compatible with the nature of this mission, Agent - it’s imperative we don’t mess this up.”

Skimming over the mission brief once more, you take in the role you have to play. An exclusive member of a popular underground sex club that’s been flagged up by Fury for suspicion of covering up a huge drug ring. Target ‘Antonio Maxwell’ - the leader the Avengers were looking to take down. While it wasn’t a world-ending level threat, the new drug allegedly supplied by Maxwell had already implemented significant damage and a high number of mysterious death cases to those in contact with him, concerning enough for higher ups to ask for help with this.

That’s where you came in.

You had enough background knowledge of ring leaders and crime bosses to call point on this - having worked undercover multiple times in this specific area over your years as an agent. Knowing how men like this worked and their strategies to cover their tracks was your forte. This would be a piece of cake for you. Yeah, the sex club element was a new challenge for you, but you were up for it.

“Okay boys. I’m in.”

Pleased hums and mumbled chatter from Steve and Tony as they finished up the paperwork with your agreement faded to the distance as you read till the bottom of the page of the brief - a new detail you must have missed before catching your eye and making you frown in confusion. Lifting your gaze to the men, you question the two of them one more time.

“Um- guys, it says here I’ll be working with a partner? Can I ask who it is?”

And just as Steve and Tony throw each other a worried look that has your eyes growing wide with realisation, you hear the door click open, a tall, beefy figure joining the room to announce his presence.

You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.

“Sorry I’m late Punk, what did’ya need?”

Bucky Barnes.

“Y’know you don’t have to look so happy to see me dollface, I know how much you love spending time with me.”

Hell didn’t have shit on this.

Barnes is the literal bane of your existence. Constantly a pain in your ass since he had nothing better to do with his days than annoy you. Avenger you may not be, but the amount of time you still have to spend around him is ridiculous. Training, gym, drills. He just seems to be in your presence 24/7 and if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he was doing it on purpose. His teasing and childish remarks at your capability to do your job always has you biting your tongue around him. Frustration leading you to walk away from what you were previously doing, or causing you to snap in anger and scream at him in front of the other recruits - smug smile plastered over the bastard’s face knowing he’d won, yet again.

Bucky was unbearable.

You are also possibly the only one in the entire Shield initiative, who hadn’t fallen for his charm or swooned over him - women and men actually falling over their feet just at the sight of him - never mind what they did to actually have a scrap of his attention.

Sickening.

And so you believe it’s because of this reason, Barnes has made it his business to make sure every day is torture for you. His fragile masculinity unable to comprehend that you’re just not into him. Not desperate enough to whittle your entire being to admiring him.

Even if he did have them ocean blue eyes you occasionally got lost in.

Where the hell did that come from?

“Just because we’re paired together Barnes, doesn’t mean we have to speak - let’s just get this mission done with and go back home. Sooner this is over the better.”

Bucky’s mock gasp at your scolding only boils your blood hotter.

“Okay, first of all, ouch, I thought we were friends, baby.” His low chuckle and his pet names have you fighting the war going on between your cunt and your head.

“And second of all, we kinda have to talk. It’s part of the mission - the whole sex crazed relationship we got going on to be exclusive members of the club, remember? Silly bunny, I know your head gets a little fuzzy sometimes, but catch up dollface, you’re slacking.”

Okay, that shouldn’t be making my panties wet.

Huffing a frustrated sigh and ignoring his efforts to rile you up, you snatch the mission brief out of the compartment of the car and place it over your legs to read it over one more time before reaching your destination. Not giving Bucky the satisfaction of seeing your thighs rub together to stop the ache in your pussy and the butterflies in your stomach.

“There’s a good girl.”

Fuck.

The tacky neon signs and the disco lights of the bar you arrive at almost give you a headache worse than Barnes did on a bad day - you know this is a front to their downstairs adult party.

Stepping out of the car in your knee high leather boots is a task, but you make it look effortless as you smoothly swing your legs round and stand up, shuffling your tight, mini black dress down to cover as much of your ass as possible. Your outfit had to match the vibe of the character you were playing and you didn’t sell her short.

Bucky, however, got the better end of the stick in his full black suit. Top three buttons of his shirt undone to reveal his broad chest with a smattering of hair.

Stupid fucking Barnes and his stupid, slutty chest.

Closing your eyes and inhaling a deep breath to calm your headspace for the mission, you fail to notice the silent ex-assassin creep up beside you and whisper in your ear, “Last minute nerves, dollface?”.

Your eyes open wide in shock at the feel of his breath against your neck, goosebumps running down your arms and you push down the urge to shiver. “Oh Jesus fucking Christ, do you mind? A bit of personal space would be nice please”, turning your head towards Bucky, you realise too late how close he is to you, noses almost bumping together as his intense gaze pins you to your spot.

“Can’t start getting all jumpy on me now, baby bunny. Thought you were good at your job.”

You can nearly feel the motion of his lips moving as he speaks. How easy it would be to just move that tiny bit closer to finally know if they’re as soft and plump as they look.

You’re better than this, he’s making you look weak - that’s his plan.

Your leather heels click as you walk away from him, tearing your body out of danger and berating yourself for acting just like those back at the compound, the lovesick recruits who put Bucky Barnes on a pedestal. You would not be like them. Not in a million years.

You don’t see Bucky cock his head as he watches your hips sway side to side, but you definitely hear his low whistle in reference to your ass - his grunt of laughter following soon after when you stick your middle finger up over your shoulder at him.

Security protocol of the club doesn’t take as long as you thought it would, the tech department handling your fake identity documents with the utmost care to ensure there would be no issues.

Now, you stood at the ominous red door at the end of the hallway, about to be let into the most prestigious sex club known. You couldn’t say you were totally ready, the natural fear of the unknown rattling your psyche. Yet, you didn’t let it show. Face stoic with a subtle sultry undertone to enhance your allure.

Bucky’s coded knocks on the door echoes through the hallway, his cold metal hand snaking over your waist and squeezing the meat of your hip. If the door hadn't opened as quick you would have stomped on his foot.

Would of served the fucker right.

And soon enough, with a private spoken password, only sent to the invited elite, you were in.

Holy. Fuck.

Had Bucky not kept his arm around your waist you would have fell flat on your ass.

Everywhere you looked had your heart beat erratically speeding up. Cocks. Tits. Pussys. All of it was on show without a care in the world. Threesomes, gangbangs, doms and subs. Any sexual position or kink your mind could conjure up was playing out in front of you - the glow of the red strobe lights highlighting the sweat, spit and cum covering numerous naked bodies.

The music blasting over the speakers had no chance of silencing the high pitched moans and needy whimpers of pleasure. Whips smacking against skin and leather cuffs clinking against railings - you didn’t know how to process your senses going haywire.

“What’s a matter, dollface? Don’t tell me you haven’t seen a cock before.”

You don’t think you could have suppressed the tingles shooting through your nerves at Bucky’s use of the word ‘cock’, the image already engraved in your mind of you squirming in his hold as he tells you his filthy thoughts.

Bitch, now is not the time.

Right, you had a mission to complete and you couldn’t fuck this up.

“Shut the fuck up Barnes. We didn’t come here to fuck around and argue, so you scour the left side of the room and I’ll take the right - if you see Maxwell then communicate through the coms.” Without listening to what would without a doubt be another jab at you from Bucky, you stepped away and left him alone, praying that a moment away from him would clear your head.

It had been at least an hour of searching, still no sign of Maxwell or at least any type of drug dealings you could snap a picture of for evidence. The ache ever present in your feet from the six inch leather boots. You had scoured the entirety of your side, ignoring the clapping of wet skin and grunts of feral men. You just needed a minute to rethink your strategy and come up with a new plan - something worthy enough to draw Maxwell out of his hiding spot for the night.

Stepping into the nearest open plan room, you lean against the wall and rub your temples in an attempt to get your brain flowing. Not noticing the growing crowd gathering to watch the spectacle on the sofa in the middle of the room. You really hadn’t paid attention to the man laying a woman down and spreading her legs for everyone to get a good view, too preoccupied with your own situation.

It only registered what was happening when you heard the first breathy whine of a woman, slowly lifting your head to witness a man licking her pussy in languid strokes, thumbs holding her folds open to suck her clit.

Shit, this is really happening.

It also occurred to you that the woman kind of looked like you - same hair colour and body type, enough to have you imagining it was you in her position.

You swallowed the growing knot in your throat, the arousal pooling in your lacy underwear creating a sticky mess. Chest heaving up and down as the scene before you had your breaths coming in heavier.

What the fuck am I doing?

You had never counted yourself as a voyeurist. You most definitely were not inexperienced and had experimented plenty in the bedroom with partners, but this was a total new sensation for you. Watching someone else bask in the pleasure their partner was bringing them, legs trembling uncontrollably. It was really doing it for you.

Without permission, you found yourself stepping closer, greedy to be just that tiny bit nearer to the main event. Your mouth stayed open as you placed your hands on both of your arms, licking your lips with raw need.

As you got a closer look at the man, you took in his mid length brunette hair, tied up in a bun at the back of his head. He had a broad stocky build, beefy and probably big enough to tower over you should he stand up. Wait…

He looks like Bucky.

You shifted on the balls of your feet at your new epiphany, shaking in anticipation on whether to stay and watch or leave.

Surely it couldn’t hurt to watch a little, right?

Bucky was growing fed up with the lack of leads on his hunt for information. No sightings of drugs and no clue where the leader of the drug ring was. He guesses you were still searching on your end too, a silent line on his com alerting him you’d found nothing as well.

He should probably go check to see how you’re doing.

While Bucky knows how irritated he makes you, it wasn’t his intention to make you dislike him, believe it or not. In fact, he had the biggest crush on you and just didn’t know how to deal with it. It’s true he really is used to most people gawking in lust over him and the endless invitations to go out for a drink. So when he first observed your blatant disregard for him, it sent him into a frenzy, powerless to his instant attraction for you. He was desperate to get a reaction out of you, even if it had you wanting to pummel him into the ground.

You’re cute when you’re angry, sue him.

And he’s not stupid enough to not comprehend the tension between you, you’re just unwilling to give in - don’t want the shame of contradicting yourself and falling for him like the rest of them.

Silly little bunny, you’d give in soon enough.

So imagine his surprise when he silently walks into the next room to find you there, hand trembling against your neck as you watch a man sloppily eat a woman’s pussy, teeth biting your lower lip to stop any noise from coming out of your mouth.

His naughty little minx, getting off by watching other people fuck. He was impressed.

Bucky wouldn’t have pegged you as a little voyeur. He can’t say he’s disappointed though.

It’s times like this where Bucky praises his super hearing from the serum, low chatter from the upper floor has him pulled out of his thoughts of you and sneaking a glance up to see a middle aged man leaning over the open plan railing and looking directly out at you. Maxwell.

Fuck, he was onto you.

Options speed through Bucky's head as he quickly concocts a plan to kill two birds with one stone. Throwing the target off your scent and getting to have some fun with you.

Time to play, babydoll.

Glued to the scene in front of you, your surroundings blur, mission forgotten as you focus on the sounds of the woman’s sloppy wet cunt, obscene squelching from the man’s thick fingers that fuck her pussy and her juices spraying out.

All the more reason for the loud gasp that escapes you as a cold hard hand wraps around your throat and drags you back into a firm chest, the whir of fingers squeezing the sides to slightly cut off your airway. Warm breath tickling the curve of your neck as electricity shoots through your body.

“Who’d have thought a stuck up little bitch like you enjoys something as dirty as this, huh?”

Shit.

“You’re a filthy fuckin’ slut, you know that baby? Y’know how disgusting you are getting off on this?” You can’t help crossing your legs to try and create some friction to ease the ache in your cunt and the needy whimpers that echo across the room even with Bucky's hand choking you - blending with the slick noise of the woman’s wet pussy on the sofa.

You weren't banking on your mission partner catching you in the devious act, anxiety bleeding over you as he finds out how shameless you are and how much you want him.

A large number of the growing crowd have turned to watch the display of you and Bucky. Humiliation washing over you from his degradation and how exposed you feel.

Bucky hadn’t felt this horny for as long as he could remember, his hard cock straining against his trousers over how much he’s enjoying turning you to putty in his hands for everyone to see.

You’re mine, little bunny. Even if everyone can see the dumb fucked out mess I’ve reduced you to.

“C’mon dollface, you’re normally so feisty, where’s them claws you like to scratch me with, kitten?”

His condescending words only cease to turn you into a bigger puddle, unable to get your words out without moaning or stuttering, “B-bucky, p-please.”

Even though Bucky wants to hold out longer, he can’t help but bring his other arm up from his firm hold on your waist up to your tits, toying with your peaked nippes over your dress.

Somehow, the little shit knew they were sensitive.

His grip on your throat moves up to hold your jaw, making sure you’re still watching the other couple play as he tweaks your nippes, rubbing his thumb over them and squeezing your tits. He fucking loved it. The broken moans you no longer care to keep down break free as drool drips down your chin.

You didn't think you could like being spoken to the way Bucky does, his harsh words but soothing tone has your head fuzzy and your mind empty, no coherent thoughts other than the man behind you.

Your ass rubs back onto Bucky’s crotch as you squirm in his hold, the throaty rumble he lets out only worsening the throb of your cunt.

“Y’know they kinda look like us don’t ya think, bunny baby? Is that what has you so fuckin’ gone, huh? You wanna know how good I’d eat your pretty little pussy?” He starts to grind his cock into the curve of your ass, the thin material of your dress leaving no guesses to how thick he really is.

It’s helpless as your head flops back onto Bucky's shoulder, boneless in his arms. You’ve forgotten about everyone else in the room with you, only enough room in your head to process who’s making you feel so good.

The tingling of your swollen clit has you wailing needy moans, the lack of stimulation edging you and forcing tears from your eyes.

“Oh dollface, you’re crying now? You need me to make all those tingles go away?”

You couldn’t nod your head fast enough, dragging his hand to place it over your soaked panties under your dress with pleas whispered against his neck. He’d punish you for that in normal circumstances, but right now he really wants to see you cum.

His warm fingers gently start rubbing your pulsing clit, the added friction of your lace underwear making your eyes roll to the back of your head and high pitched whimpers to fill the room. Gyrating your hips to follow his motion, you can feel the knot in your stomach getting tighter, so close to that release you’re internally begging for.

“You’re so fuckin’ desperate, bunny, my cocks rock fuckin’ solid for ya, bet you could take this fat cock in your tight little cunt.”

You can feel the brink of your orgasm on the precipice from his words, his Brooklyn accent spilling through as he continues to rub his huge cock against your back.

But it’s the switch from rubbing to repeatedly tapping your bundle of nerves as he licks the trail of sweat from your neck to groan in your ear that makes you finally let go.

“Now, fuckin’ cum for me before I leave your pathetic ass begging for me.”

Your legs give out as you suck lungfuls of air back in, eyes cross eyed as you see stars from how powerful your orgasm is. You don’t think you’ve ever cum that hard before in your life, and you’d crawl to Bucky on all fours to beg for it again.

Eventually, your high slowly descends and you come back down to earth, body limp but twitching with spasms. Should you even try to take a step forward you know you’d fall flat on your face, so you're grateful for Bucky keeping a tight embrace around you and cooing shushes into your ear as you muster a fucked out smile on your face.

You don’t care to see if anyone’s still around, if the couple that turned you on and got you into this state in the first place are still going at it.

Bucky, however, takes a peak back up to Maxwell, knowing he’d watched the whole show and his worries had been reassured by your brazen display that you weren’t suspicious. He catches the back of his coat, walking down the steps and into a back room.

The smirk grows back on his face as he takes one hand away from your body, your whine of displeasure all the more satisfying for what comes next, he won’t be able to see your face but that’s okay - he’s more than happy to feel your reaction instead.

Sucking his fingers from your juices that are still running down your leg, he presses the button on the com to send an update on status to backup and Steve.

“Target's position secured. Distraction followed through and on route to prepare for arrest, over.”

Your eyes rip open from your hazy daydream as you soak in Bucky’s update to the rest of the team. Blood running cold when it finally processes his motive for your little show.

“My my little bunny, I gotta say I’m impressed you folded so easily for lil’ old me.” Bucky’s murmur against your head vibrates through your entire being, but you can’t bring yourself to move an inch.

His chuckle has fury bubbling up to the surface, yet you’re speechless as he leaves a gentle kiss to your temple and departs with his final words.

“Didn’t know you were a squirter either, doll. I had fun, looking forward to the next time too. But let’s go catch Maxwell for now, yeah? I’ll even keep hush of your unprofessionalism on the job.”

You can only stare as he strolls towards the back room where you can only assume Maxwell is, whistling a tune to himself as he tucks his hands in his pockets, uncaring to the salacious acts of sex still occurring around you.

You’re so fucked.

A/N: I have to thank my angel baby @rookthorne for the inspiration in writing this after one of our little domme sessions 👀 loves you so much kotenok 💗 thank you for reading lovelies!!

[povlvr]

1 • A New Kind Of Mission | OPERATION: FAKING IT ...? 

1 • A New Kind Of Mission | OPERATION: FAKING IT …? 

Description: You are summoned to a meeting with Tony Stark, Bucky Barnes & the long suffering PR Executive to present a new kind of mission: Operation: Faking it. Fake dating Bucky Barnes to raise his reputation with the public sounds fun, right?

Pairing: Beefy Bucky Barnes x Female Avenger Reader

Word Count: 3.2k

Warnings: Cute Bucky, swearing.

A/N: I can't believe the response the master list got so thanks for all the likes & follows!! FYI I wanted the presentation above to look as goofy & ridiculous as possible, as though Tony actually sat at a computer tongue out in concentration drawing tiny hearts around Bucky.

Series Masterlist

[Next Chapter]

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‘Could you repeat that again from the top Tony?’ you glanced at the shy super soldier to you left expecting a similar annoyance that you were feeling to be reflected back at you, if anyone looked like they wanted the floor to open up & swallow them whole it was him & quite frankly you were ready to jump in there with him because you were convinced you had entered a parallel dimension before you were summoned into this meeting; that is the only explanation.

You didn’t even give Tony the chance to open his mouth, holding your finger up to shush him as you began summarising the tomfoolery that had just been presented to you.

‘You are concerned about the image of the team, specifically public opinion of Sargent Barnes, the man whom I might add saves the world on the regular & has jumped through hoop after hoop to appease the government & public, so the only way, literally the only strategy a so-called ‘genius’ with a powerhouse of a PR team behind him can come up with is to stage a romance between said super soldier & myself? Did I get everything there? Encompassed your PowerPoint presentation you worked so tirelessly on, clip-art hearts & everything?’ 

‘You seem to have grasped the basic concept of ‘Operation: Faking It’ & also thank you for noticing the hearts.’ Tony cockily boasted; you loved Tony, you really did, but even this was trying your patience.

After giving yourself a moment to gather your thoughts, including a exagerrated irritated breath release & nose bridge pinch you were ready to verbally rearrange his insides, when in doubt point out a man’s stupidity & misogyny aka the Romanoff technique.

‘Again, it’s not quite adding up for me because you’re telling me that all the years I have been working my ass off to be in the position I am was leading up to the moment where I have basically been told my sole use in the team is to fake a relationship so that the public, who are complete morons by the way will like a man who was a prisoner of war, tortured & brainwashed for 70 years?’

You caught the smirk on Bucky’s face out the corner of your eye, you knew he would enjoy witnessing Tony Stark being firmly put in his place & you hoped he didn’t think your reluctance to participate was anything to do with him. 

Tony’s offended face & fake pearl clutching almost broke your composure ‘Don’t twist our words kid, you know you’re a valued member of the team & everyone’s favourite Avenger.’

‘Then why was I asked? Why me? You could have chosen Natasha? Hell, you could have actually thought outside the box & suggested Steve, Sam, Thor? You know be an ally & get the LGBTQ+ community behind this.’ Yours & Tony’s silent battle of raising a brow to each other was swiftly interrupted by the ‘expert’ PR Exec.

‘You were chosen because your image with the public is solid across the board which will intern lift Sargent Barnes’ & the market research concluded that the idea of two assassins together would make the public nervous.’ 

‘Ex assassins’ you & Bucky corrected in tandem between gritted teeth. If looks could kill she would have been dust from the scowl you gave her.

Tony was quick to lower the tension, knowing you were a hair's breadth away from walking out, ‘Plus you’re his type & Thor doesn’t look like he’d snuggle up to Barnes quite as adorably as you would for the cameras.’

‘Would people even buy it?’ the whole time the ridiculous proposal was being presented you couldn’t help thinking that the public wouldn’t even fall for it?

‘If you make it convincing enough they will, public dates, hand holding, glancing into each other’s eyes, bit of PDA, under the jumper action around the city.’

‘Thin ice tony’ You warned. A wave of humiliation overcame you at having to ask the question & address the elephant in the room. ‘What I was implying is that Sargent Barnes is a 10. I am … well not, would they even believe he’d date me?’

Tony’s face fell at your comment & you could see Bucky’s expression of confusion in your peripherals, normally you’d explain a modern term to him but this one he could remain clueless about, the last thing he needed to hear was that you thought he was a 10.

You were confident enough when it came to guys, but Bucky wasn’t any other guy, he was probably the prettiest man you’d ever laid eyes on, he was huge & had a hell of a stare on him but was so soft once you got to know him, you’d become friends since your arrival in the tower. You never thought of him as more than a friend, he could do date anyone he set eyes on, like someone supermodel levels of hot so never thought of him as more than a friend.

Tony looked at you with the sincerest face you’d ever seen on him, ‘You’re an 11 kid.’ 

As much as you appreciated the gesture & threw him a little wink of thanks you were still completely unconvinced this was going to work.

‘Whilst I commend the work that went into the presentation, I’m not sure going for a coffee & dinner is going to get anyone talking.’ 

‘Well, there’s a little more to it than that.’ Tony stated like he was pointing out the obvious that this stuff is rife in the entertainment industry.

‘We hire a photographer & leak some pictures to the press for your coffee date, it will drum up some attention for the gossip sites & then fan attention with social media will do the leg work to get you noticed in the wider news circuit.’ 

‘So, you’re almost encouraging strangers to spy on us, that’s a bit of an ick for me Tony.’

‘You’ll be safe with Tin Man over there.’ He assured.

‘I know I will be, but who’s to say that when I’m on my own I will be safe if people are reporting my location to Deuxmoi every day, where I hang out, my schedule.’ You shuddered at the thought, yeah you could handle yourself but the idea of looking over your shoulder constantly wasn't appealing.

‘Tony, I’m not putting her in danger just to score points.’ Bucky warned, he’s a man of few words but when he does speak everyone in the room pays attention at his deep gravelly voice, you couldn’t help noticing the way his jaw was clenching.

‘Ok, if you agree to this then switch it up, go to a new coffee place, bakery, book shop etc just whilst we’re running the campaign. Oh & it’s probably best you both temporarily re-locate to the tower too, just to prevent any potential for people following you home. I’ve already set up the arrangements on the assumption you agree.’

The very quiet PR chimed in. ‘It’s not that we expect crazy fans to show up at your door, we just expect the media focus to be intense at the start & you really don’t want them chasing after you home.’

‘Enough Tony, she’s not uprooting her whole life, putting herself in danger for me & my mistakes, all to prove to people I’m no longer a psycho killer.’

You reached across to squeeze his arm, he wasn’t huge on physical touch but you both needed grounding to keep this meeting from boiling over, you spoke to him earnestly ‘They weren’t your mistakes Bucky.’ Before turning back to Tony ‘if and it’s a big IF I do this then relocating to the tower is a sensible option I guess, I’d have a list of demands though & so will Bucky.’

‘I expect nothing less kid. Look, it will be initially coffee, dinner, a bit of social media interaction, attend a party or Gala nothing taxing & nothing you don’t already do as friends, so just hold hands, stand closer to one another & the gossip sites will put two & two together & write about you. Then we’ll reassess in a month to see how it’s going & if it’s worth continuing etc. Think it over & we’ll reconvene tomorrow.’

‘Ok but how does it end? It can’t go on forever, what if one of us meets someone, we’ll eventually start seeing other people for real, I mean a girl has needs Tony.’ Bucky’s stomach weirdly dropped at the thought of something not even real ending, then couldn’t get his mind off you at your other concern.

‘Easy tiger, it’s simple, a ‘close source’ will tell a reputable publication that you work better as friends & decided to call it a day. You both get out of it your reputation intact & Bucky’s elevated if all goes to plan.’

You let out a breath & rubbed your face trying to keep your mind from going into overdrive, ‘Ok, can Bucky & I use the room to talk it over & decide if we want to do it?’

‘Sure you can Kiddo, oh … and no missions whilst this is going on, k byeee’ 

As the eccentric billionaire swanned out the office in style with the PR exec on his tail you turned to the Super Solider on your left, you couldn’t help but laugh at his expression, it was a mix between being perplexed by the situation & angry about being benched.

‘So, no missions aside, what do you think about all this?’

He couldn't quite look you in the eyes as he gathered his thoughts, ‘I think … I’m mainly embarrassed that I’m 107 years old & being made to stage a romance so that strangers on the internet will like me more & that you of all people are being dragged into it.’ A little sad smile graced his face before his customary scowl returned.

‘I get it, modern times suck I bet, but there will be more than just strangers paying attention. It’s laughable that they didn’t lead with appeasing the higher ups which could intern give you more freedom & less scrutiny seeing you as a ‘functioning’ person. I would have agreed to it in a second had that been mentioned, if you were comfortable with it, of course.’

‘But why are you so willing to help? It’s a lot to ask of you to put your life on hold, move & then the fake dating thing.’

‘Helping out a friend is reason enough. Plus, think about it, we won’t have to cook, clean or do laundry for like a month if we’re living in the tower, it will be like a vacation & Tony will give us whatever we want.’ You wiggled your brows coming up with a list in your head of ridiculous items you could ask Tony for as the Super Solider shook his head chuckling at you.

‘I only need a bed.’

‘Where’s the fun in that Bucky? We could be outrageous I’m thinking new car, a puppy, cinema room in my apartment, unlimited ice cream, a unicorn.’ You checked off your fingers at every wild thing running through your imagination.

He raised his brows trying to stifle a laugh at your ridiculous list, ‘you do realise unicorns are mythical beings, don’t you?’

‘Hey if anyone can get me a Unicorn, it’s Tony Stark.’

‘And a puppy? You are an actual puppy you couldn’t handle one on your own.’ 

‘Yeah, a puppy, why not? You can be their Papa. We could take him on walks around the city, the beach, oh my god we can set him up an Instagram account & all wear matching outfits in our pictures. It’ll be so freaking cute.’ You were practically bouncing on your chair. 

Bucky being the voice of reason wanted you to think this over a bit more, ‘Don’t get your hopes up Doll, Tony hasn’t agreed to it yet, what about missions? Who will look after him? What about this when it’s all over, we won’t be living in the tower, so I won’t see him.’ He looked so sad saying that & you knew you had him wrapped around your finger, no one can say no to you.

‘You could come over & see him whenever you like or us come to yours, we’ll share, he’ll be ours. Tony can’t say no to me, he thinks he can, but I just need to flash him some fluttery lashes & he would sign over Stark Industries to me, so me asking for a puppy is showing him mercy, trust me, the puppy is ours. Fury will love him, did you know Fury loves dogs, he has two, I'm not supposed to say what kind, if anyone asks they are Dobermann's ... they're actually Pomeranian's, white little fluffy things. I bet we’ll have so many people fighting to look after him when we’re on missions.’

Bucky couldn’t help being swept up in the imaginary scenario of you sharing a dog with him, despite him knowing it was a terrible idea & all the horror scenarios his brain conjured at the thought he nodded his head at you. His therapist would be proud of him choosing the path that leads to potential happiness instead of the safe miserable one he usually went for despite it being reckless & not thought out in the slightest. Who was he kidding, he couldn’t say no to you.

‘Ok so the puppy is on the list’ he conceded, ‘But, do you actually need a new car?’ You beamed at him agreeing to the puppy so easily, you should use your powers of persuasion for evil if the hero life didn’t work out for you, you thought.

You shrugged your shoulders trying to justify the request knowing Tony would expect a valid argument presented to him to justify the cost, ‘Nope, I never drive but you just never know when you’ll need a ride so it’s handy to have, ya know?’ You argued.

‘Where are you going to keep the car, does your apartment have a parking garage?’ 

‘No, it does not. I could keep it at the tower, yeah Tony will let me.’ You nodded trying to convince him with your smug smile & challenging eye contact.

He looked at you amused knowing you would fold at his next logical question, ‘So, you’d have to travel to the tower to then travel somewhere else?’

‘I see your point.’ Ok, so you couldn’t win every battle & you really didn’t think the car through in fairness, it just sounded so fun to be able to go on rides in the middle of the night to McDonalds without anyone from Uber judging your eating habits.

‘How about if you need a ride you call me & I’ll take you, I’ve got my bike or my car if the puppy is with you.’

‘Sweet. I guess it lowers my chance of being kidnapped by an Uber driver.’ You grinned at him, he’d learn to regret that offer, you really did get on with Bucky & he seemed comfortable with you, he tended to keep you in check & according to Tony ‘within the atmosphere of reality’ when your enthusiasm or imagination ran riot, so you knew this would be a fairly simple assignment for you both.

‘hmmm what else could we get?’ you said thinking out loud, your fingers drumming on your chin as you pondered what else to ask for.

‘Like I said, having a bed, you & a puppy seems a good deal.’ You let his words sink in because he would be stuttering in no time at the gaff, oh his sweet innocent 1940’s mind.

‘What I mean Is …’ Bucky stuttered, he was such a gentleman that any accidental innuendo or double meaning took him a second to register & then a flood of embarrassment would hit him, it was incredibly cute really.

‘I got what you meant, don’t have a coronary. What about a cabin in the woods, co-ownership? We can take road trips, swim in a lake, see baby deer, build a fire. Oh, the puppy will love it, we need to think of a name for them, we can get matching Kagools.’ You quickly clapped your hands in excitement, you wanted a rainy forest & warm cabin covered in blankets & all snuggling up in front of the fire.

Bucky chuckled at you knowing there was no talking you out of something once you’d painted that picture in your head, ‘Whatever you want Bambi. Just make a list & see what you can get away with I say.’ He chuckled.

You blushed at the nickname, you needed to think of a woodland related one for him. ‘So, we’re doing this? Coffee, dinner dates, bit of insta flirting?’ 

‘Sounds like we are, no idea what insta flirting is though.’ He admitted shyly.

You smiled warmly at him, ‘I’ll teach ya.’ He couldn’t help reaching out for your hand & bringing it to his mouth, he didn’t understand why you were always so kind & understanding towards him, he always enjoyed spending time with you so to have an excuse to be in your vicinity whenever he wanted felt like it was his lucky day.

You winked as his lips touched your knuckles gently, ‘That’s the spirit.’ 

‘Hey, that was genuine.’ He faked scowled at you as he unlinked your fingers.

‘Oh, Sorry.’ You blushed at his gesture & that him being sweet came from a real place, you reached out to him & placed a kiss on his cheek. 

‘So we’re doing this.’ You smiled at him & Bucky found himself reflecting it on his own, he would even go so far as to say he was looking forward to the next month.

As you made your way home to pack up your belongings & spend one final night in your apartment you couldn’t help but be excited for what was to come, yes for the puppy but Bucky being there with you too, he was a good guy & needed pushing to leave his house when he wasn’t on missions. He had once told you that living his life as a free man was stressful, he’d missed out on so much, having been held captive for so long he found the choices of what to do & where to go overwhelming at times so just stayed home. You always hated the thought of him alone, so having a little family tied together with a puppy would be good for him, who cares about the PR bullshit you thought.

The next day you both crossed the T’s & dotted the I’s & laid out the final plan & agreements with Tony & Rachel the ‘PR wizard', you’d snitch on Tony to Dr Strange at a later date for the ridiculous title he gave her. 

So, you didn’t end up getting the blue whale on your list, you compromised graciously with a whale watching trip, a trip to Wakanda to see Bucky’s goats, use of Tony’s log cabin in the woods whenever you liked, a puppy & unlimited Ben & Jerry’s for life for both you & the super soldier, quite frankly it seemed like a sweet deal. 

Bucky quietly admired your strength in arguing every crazy demand & saw Tony almost working out how he could get you a blue whale at one point before you relented to common sense once Bucky had managed to talked you down but mostly he loved seeing the sheer joy on your face at every yes from Tony, immediately turning to him with a wink, he knew that the next month or so would be filled with your unwavering enthusiasm for every event & would hopefully let him experience some of it through you, it was just a few dates & pictures with a friend, nothing more, right? 

---

Hoped you enjoyed guys, this was just the set up chapter ready for the two fluffy idiots to commence their faux romance. Don't forget to like, reblog & follow!!

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[tirsynni]

I have another question! (Sorry if this is a

weird ask). I read a lot of your LoZ fics and love how you write the different pairings. I was wondering your thoughts on Sidon x Link? I haven't really seen any long fics with them and was wondering if that could be a possibility? Unless it's just not your cup of tea. Thanks again! <3

This is absolutely not a weird ask. lol No worries.

I enjoy Sidon/Link and I've written for them before. Hell, Sidon really comes as an oblivious guy with an insane crush in TotK. Like, chill, man. rofl It's incredibly easy to imagine everyone in Zora's Domain thinking that Sidon and Link actually had something going on (with Yona's full and enthusiastic support).

Overall, an enjoyable but possibly too-sweet ship? A little too easy? Not the right type of tension for me? Ironically, Sidon's enthusiastic adoration of Link, which is a great reason for their ship, is a turnoff to me actually shipping them. I love some snark, conflict, tension, etc.

TotK (and Yona) helpfully point out some things which could lead to some fractures in their outwardly idyllic relationship. Mainly, Sidon doesn't like conflict. He really, really doesn't. He does his best to be happy and to cheer others up. He avoids conflict and things which could lead to conflict. He smiles brightly and sparkles and is bright and extravagant and wants to pay attention to the happy and positive stuff, not on conflict and potential loss.

Link in turn is the type of guy who doesn't deal with that crap. Not "doesn't put up with it" like Yona. He doesn't deal with it. At all. Sidon avoids his responsibilities? Fine, whatever. Link will handle it. No conversation. No fuss. No making Sidon actually deal with the issues at hand like Yona forced him to do. There's no indication that it even occurs to Link to try to open Sidon's eyes. That's not how Link works. If there's an issue, Link doesn't bitch. Hell, it can be argued that he barely plans. He just handles it. One of the themes in TotK is that Link isn't alone, but when you get right down to it, Link would have done the whole thing alone without complaint or objection or even really asking for help. Zelda asked for him. People volunteered. People literally threw themselves into battles where he had otherwise been fighting alone.

There's a running gag in BotW and TotK that no one recognizes Link as the Hero and Champion. It's even funnier in TotK because he has spent so long saving and helping people and acting as Princess Zelda's Knight. As funny as it is, though, I would argue that there's a good reason for it: when Link is acting as Zelda's Knight, he plays the proper role and wears the highly visible Champion Blue, similar to Tony Hawk needing his skateboard to be recognized. Otherwise, he's just Link: the guy who wanders off and happens to come back to the stable riding a buck. The weird, quiet, but helpful guy who occasionally needs to scrub the cooking pot before anyone else can use it. Link and the Champion are as different as Clark Kent and Superman. Link doesn't really like to stand out. He doesn't like to draw attention to things. If there's a problem, he just quietly fixes it instead of pointing out that someone else really, really needs to handle their own shit.

On that note, it's Link being the Hero of the Wild and Champion which makes Link safe to Sidon, almost naively so. It's possible that Sidon's struggle with conflict stems from the traumatic loss of his sister at a young age. He avoids Yona in TotK because he is struggling with the fear of losing her like he lost Mipha and, again, can't deal with conflict. He hides instead and insists that he's performing another important duty. Unlike Mipha, Link came back. He literally came back from the dead, avenged Mipha, and defeated the Calamity. I think it's telling that, of all the moments to commemorate, Sidon chose when Link was being a powerful warrior with Sidon, proving his strength, proving that he was with Sidon and wasn't going to be easily defeated by the thing which took Mipha away from him. Again, pretty damned naive and feeds well into Sidon's deliberate and energetic optimism. The beginning of TotK proved how easily Link could fall. It doesn't matter. While Sidon is clearly fretting over Yona and about possibly losing her in TotK, he doesn't fret over Link like that. Link has proven that he's safe. That conflict that he has with Yona doesn't exist with Link, even if it possibly should.

So you have two guys who handle conflict in really unhelpfully opposing ways. There's the bonus that Sidon would probably tell himself that everything was great, there was no conflict at all, and Link probably wouldn't even recognize the actual nature of the conflict because he's so used to just shrugging and quietly handling matters himself.

Yona -- or someone like Yona -- being there helps with another hurdle in their relationship: I can't imagine the Hero of the Wild being trapped in a formal position like being the primary partner of a Prince/King. A good chunk of his backstory (even if it tends to get overshadowed by Zelda Angst) is how much the weight of being the Knight and Hero and Hylian Champion with all eyes on him fucked him up. He actually gives -- in canon -- a reason for being so quiet, and it's directly related to that stress. Sidon having a dedicated partner and Queen like Yona take the formal role while Link continues to be the Hero of the Wild would be helpful.

So yeah, I would absolutely be open to writing the ship. I've written them before, if not that many fics. The challenge, especially in regards to a long!fic, would be navigating these hurdles to create a solid, believable relationship while also writing interesting, in-character, plot-focused tension. Like, is there miscommunication based on a romcom trope or is there miscommunication because Sidon is willfully refusing to communicate and Link lacks the skills? How would Link react if he was forced under the spotlight again? How would Sidon's enthusiastic adoration and cheer react if there was actual conflict with Link, since we never actually see that in canon?

If you want just short and sweet fluff for these two? Very easy. Writing something longer and dealing with these things would require more time and thought. lol Definitely possible, though.

[tamelee]

Hii, when are you uploading your next art? It's been like ages lol. Also how's your progress on manga going? And can you suggest some other artists you know, artists like you? Since you also started from 0 followers at some point and your progress on your art is also very inspiring and i guess you know many different artists. I'm searching for inspiration and looking for some Low key artists from other fandoms. I'm slowing trying to improve on my digital painting skills. Still at level 1. Who do you look up to for your inspiration? Sorry, this became a pretty big ask hehe.

Hi~ 💕

Ages? Yeah, ... a little over a month now. I know that because I keep track on it. I pretty much keep track on most things. I do this thing where I plan a few weeks ahead and it is supposed to make sure I have more time left because of the planning but it doesn't account for roadblocks such as wrist pain, technical issues with tablets etc-, mental states, stress, health declines or others. So.. I haven't uploaded anything in a while but I never stopped creating ^^! In fact, I'm learning every single day so that I can create more, "better" (subjective) and build a skill-set that will help me be able to make what I want. I felt like I was making art aimlessly, but having a goal helps. Though, by chance, since you're wondering- this week for sure!

And within that planning is of course the Manga! The process is a lot of fun, but also there is science behind Storytelling and I'm using what I know and learning during my graduation process as well in order to create it. That's why I didn't start drawing until I am completely happy with the story (...and now don't mind so much that my previous draft got lost even thought that was so painful lol). I was so ignorant about it though, thinking I could just... create a Manga. Like c'mon. I knew so much time and dedication went into it and yet I thought I could just... do it 😆 but also, it is this dedication that made me able to do most crazy things in life so why not. If I'm going to spend idk how many hours on this then it better matter to me. I don't want Naruto and Sasuke to just drown in some plot, I want them to actively pursue something they care about and struggle, have dark moments and conflicts... heh.

When I first started drawing.. surprisingly I didn't have that many inspirations. I had no clue what I was doing and so what inspired me was the little art-community around me on Instagram because our goals were similar. My goal to finish Inktober, a wish to "someday create a webtoon" and seeing artists around me upload their art was what inspired me. Then, talking about art, each other's uploads, our obsessions- it was all a lot of fun and helped me improve and so did they! Of course you don't have to go there, you can find artists at any stage of their journey anywhere but really try to find artists and art that you like because your style will grow from that and eventually become your own.

I guess a few artists really stood out to me then, but they're literal gods and nothing like me 🥹..they're; wlop, Z ed, Ruan Jia, Zeen Chin, Guweiz and Dao Tong Le. I had a splash art phase where I fangirl'd (still do) so hard over Bo Chen, Sean Tay, Alex Flores, Cheng Du (crow god), Foritis Wang, but there's also Paul Nong, Ley Bowen, Inhyuk Lee... and for storytelling art there's Kan Liu which art I love and Toni Infante and ooooh Astri Lohne's brushwork is amazing as well. Song Nan Li has a few artworks that I've stared at for days and would love to study someday. Jaz Chiang too. Krenz Cushart has a course that I want to purchase because those colors are sublime... and oh, I'm probably forgetting SO MANY right now but I could go on forever tbh. Lemme talk about artists and their art and I won't be able to stop. There have been many Instagram artists that I've followed but I'm not currently active on there until I graduate so I don't really remember but if you're looking for Twitter/SNS/Naruto specifically then you can look through my following-list or my reblog account here @re-tamelee. Nsfw-warning on Twitter (@ tam_e_lee) though. I think currently a few that inspire me regarding story/expression are helenpeanut, velinxi, Kishimoto, Ramón Nuñez, Moryo, Ryo Yambe, Rias Coast, Yusuke Matsumoto, Bengal, Hong Soonsang, Horikoshi- and still a few others... I'm not sure what you mean by 'low-key' or if this is not what you're looking for but I hope you can find some inspiration from this post and have fun looking at these amazing artists' art! ^^ Thankyou for your lovely ask, have a nice day 🌷 Happy drawing!

[nessieart]

TEETH pt. 13

|| The Price of Freedom ||

Eventual Tony x Reader

WC: 5.5k (again!?)

AN: Ok um, look. It’s a lot and oops? And listen here, CA:TWS is my favorite mcu movie ok? And we’re in it now. I wasn’t really sure i wanted to go this route, but now i am. Don’t worry, there’ll be more Tony soon! Promise! Thanks for following along with me and my writing journey! It means a lot to me! Enjoy.

Warnings: Canon level violence, cursing, depictions of violence, blood, guns, made up fantasy elements most likely. No y/n used. Nickname usage: Flowers, Poppy. Not proof read, it’s a hot mess!

Summary: This whole ordeal isn’t what you thought it was.

Masterlist

Previous || First || Next

Begi, lepestok.

Run, little Petal.

The Soldier, James - Bucky - whoever he was, looked over his shoulder briefly and then back down at you. He releases your hand, wiping the tears away from your face with his flesh hand.

"Don't let them see your tears," his voice is rough and slightly accented, and he lets his metal fingers fall from your chin. You vaguely remember him speaking another language the first time you -literally- ran into him.

He steps away from you, back in the middle of the room, next to the chair. It's unsettling the longer you look at it. You hear footsteps echoing down the hall that make you pause.

You go back to sit on the cold table a few feet away from the soldier and the daunting chair. It takes some effort but you manage to sit, still clutching at your stomach. Seems like the broken ribs have started healing at least.

In the next second, men in white lab coats enter the room, they pay you no mind as they guide the Soldier into the chair and take scissors to his shirt and cut it from him. You notice he's staring off blankly into nothingness as the men work around him. They connect the wires to something and they put it around his right arm, the monitors behind him come to life and you can see scans of his body and skull, his pulse and heart are also monitored; it’s steady and slow.

Then you notice the red angry scars along his left shoulder. The metal of his arm looks forcibly fused to his skin and it makes your stomach churn. And you have to remember this is Steve's Bucky, his best friend since they were kids. And you wonder what happened to him that they put that arm on him.

You wonder why he doesn't seem to remember anything. Steve, you, what he did to your brothers, and even himself. He didn't react in any way when you called him by his first name. Not physically anway.

One man pulls over a tray and brings the metal arm up and unhinges a piece of plating on the Soldier's arm and begins repairs. There's small sparks that fly around as he solders things together. The whirring of the metal arm is low as repairs are being made.

You shift a little on the table, and the Soldier notices your movement and he looks at you without moving his head, his expression is blank.

“Bucky?” You whisper, knowing he’ll hear you. His eyes go wide and the spike of his heartbeat is heard on a monitor behind him, his chest heaves and he looks around the room in a panic.

In the next second, some of the STRIKE team comes into the room, rifles in their hands as they move around the room, guarding you or the Soldier, you couldn’t be sure. One of them comes to stand next to you and he places a collar around your neck. He sneers at you when your eyes glow but he just clamps the collar on you anyway.

It’s silver, you notice, a jolt of pain goes through you the longer you try to keep your eyes alight. You go to reach up and touch it, but a few feet away from you you hear a loud zap and the whirring of a metal arm and the Soldier punches the man that was repairing his arm across the room. All the members of STRIKE draw their rifles up and point them at the Soldier.

His chest is heaving as he sits upright, hands clenched into fists, the metal arm whirs and groans as he flexes it. Everyone stands on baited breath, waiting for the Soldier to make a move, he relaxes his posture and slumps forward, resting his arms on his knees. That vacant look returns to his eyes and he stares off again.

A few moments later, you can hear a few footsteps coming closer to the vault you’re in, and in steps Pierce, with Rumlow and other members of STRIKE behind them. You haven’t seen Leon yet and you hope he’s ok. Hope he’s somewhere far away from all this.

Rumlow looks over to you, as Pierce comes to a stop in front of the Soldier, there’s concern on his face and he sees the collar around your neck. He comes to stand near you.

“How are you feeling?” He says quietly, and you scoff, looking away from him. “Your brother’s back at HQ, in case you were wondering.” He moves back to stand behind Pierce. You stare at his back, eyebrows pulled together, why would he say that? Why does he care?

Pierce then backhands the Soldier across the face hard after he doesn’t respond. The Soldier looks up through his hair that’s fallen into his face, his eyes still vacant and crystal.

“The man on the bridge…who was he?” The soldier’s voice strains and his eyes turn to you briefly before they go back to Pierce.

Pierce sighs, “You met him earlier this week on another assignment.” He goes to sit on a stool in front of the Soldier.

“I knew him,” he swallows thickly and you can see the flicker of something behind his eyes.

“Your work has been a gift to mankind,” Pierce goes on to say. And you snort behind him, it’s ignored. “You shaped the century, and I need you to do it one more time.” You look at Bucky now, his eyebrows crease and it looks like he’s struggling with something.

“But I knew him,” and you see it then, the crystal may clear from his eyes as they seem more blue now. And you realize that the Winter Soldier and Bucky Barnes are one. HYDRA just scooped and carved out what made Bucky himself. He looks at you - eyes wide - and it makes your heart hurt. And you can’t move or do anything to save him from these horrid men, because you’re helpless with the collar on. And you don’t think you could survive another bullet from one of those guns.

Pierce turns to look at the lab tech, “Prep him.”

The man stutters a moment, “He’s been out of cryo-freeze too long.”

Cryo? They were putting him on ice? No wonder he wasn’t aging all these years. What the fuck were they doing to him?

“Then wipe him and start over,” Pierce gets up and moves out of the way. He finally looks at you and a dark smirk takes over his face.

You look over at Bucky and his heart rate has spiked again, the fear in his eyes is all consuming as he stares back at you. Then he’s pushed back roughly and a mouth guard is placed in his mouth. A loud clank sounds out as the metal straps keep him in place, the machine whirs to life and the halo above the chair begins to descend.

You watch in horror as nodes of electricity spark and go to cover his face, and as they lock into place, Bucky lets out the most bone chilling screams you’ve ever heard. As he continues to scream, Pierce and the STRIKE team begin to leave. There’s tears flowing down your face and you don’t try to stop them.

“Stop,” you say weakly. No one seems to hear you over the deafening screams. “Stop it!” You say a little louder. You hobble off the table and go to push one of the lab techs away from the chair, “Enough! What are you doing to him!?”

There’s a jolt that runs through you, just enough that it knocks the wind out of you and you fall to your knees. Of course the collar has a shock system in it. You pant as you look up at Bucky, his voice is starting to go hoarse the longer he screams in agony.

-*-

It’s some time later, you don't even know the time. Was it night still, or was it morning? You’re still sitting on the floor where they left you, too tired and worn out to bother moving.

You tried to get Bucky's attention but after whatever they did to him in that chair, it's like he's a completely different person. No, not a person, a machine. The Winter Soldier has taken over and his eyes are vacant again.

The techs had given the Soldier a new tac-suit, much like the one he wore yesterday. Or earlier today? The straps pulled tight around his torso, all black gear, his arm a stark contrast against his outfit gleaming in the lights.

Someone had come in and said a phrase or words in Russian, you weren’t sure, and instantly the Soldier responded instantly, “Gotov vypolnit,” and it sent a shiver down your spine.

It’s so jarring, the man before you was nothing like the man a couple hours ago who was screaming so harsh and loud his voice had gone hoarse. The techs had left, only 2 members of STRIKE were left in the room, but they were conversing quietly in a corner. The soldier stood before you, and you leaned your head back to look at him, a sort of deja vu passed before your eyes and you hoped he experienced it too. His facial expression was blank as he crouched down before you, lifting a metal hand to the collar around your neck

“Hey! Don’t touch that!” One of the agents shouted. The soldier pays them no mind as his fingers dig into the space between your neck and the offending item and he squeezes. The whirring of his arm is subtle, the collar cracks and bends under the pressure of his hand and he yanks it off you with ease.

You instantly feel ten times better once the silver is off you, you sigh in relief and put your hand on the soldier’s silver one and look up at him, “thank you,” you say quietly.

There’s a commotion behind you as the STRIKE agents pull up their rifles and aim them at you, yelling commanding orders for the Soldier to stand down and for you to lay on the ground. There’s a guttural growl from the soldier as he places himself between you and the agents, his fists clench and you can tell he wants to reach for a weapon, but he refrains.

You stand and put your hands on the soldier’s arm, he looks at you over his shoulder, “Begi,” he tells you and you nod. You look out towards the exit of the vault you're in, you can see early morning rays shine through the windows, that had to be the way out. You squeeze the soldier’s arm once and back away, and shift, a few bones cracking into place, that silver bullet and collar definitely did a number on you.

The STRIKE agents certainly weren’t expecting the soldier to defend you, and they certainly weren’t expecting you to turn into a giant coyote and haul ass out of the vault in a blur.

-*-

You had run for a few miles before you were sure you weren’t being followed. You aren’t sure what possessed the Soldier to help you escape, but you won’t question it now.

As you make your way towards the Potomac, you can see the Triskelion in the distance. You hope Leon’s alright. If Rumlow was to be believed, then you’re sure he is. After all, you’d feel if something happened to him. Right?

The sun had barely come up as you reached the back entrance of SHIELD HQ. Everything seems to be fine on the outside, nothing out of the ordinary, agents going about their early morning routines.

You find the stairwell near the back exit you came through and quietly make your way up, the large floor numbers painted on the walls outside each door made it easier to keep track. As you round the next flight of stairs you come face to face with Steve, Sam, and a woman you haven't met before. But by the smell of her she's with them.

Steve’s in a uniform you swore you’ve seen before but can’t place, a helmet on his head covers his eyes as well, his shield hung up on his back. Sam’s in his Falcon outfit, the wings compact in its backpack, his goggles up on his head.

You all freeze and stare at each other for a beat, then Steve relaxes his stance and crouches down, bending one knee and placing the other on the floor.

"God, Flowers, you had us all worried," Steve says, he spreads his arms out and you rush to him, jumping up and licking his chin that's exposed. He chuckles and gives you a hug, one hand running down your back through your fur. "Don't ever do something like that again, Natasha's been pretty upset."

"Upset?" Sam asks incredulously, "How can you tell the difference between normal and upset?" He laughs and pats your head when you jump up to him next. "Glad you're okay, girly," he says softly.

"Uh, guys?" The woman that is with them gives them both a look, and then looks down at you, "what the hell is going on?"

Steve then goes to tell her, Maria he said her name was, that you were the friend they have been worried about since they split up from you yesterday near the bridge. Steve also tells you that Fury's alive, which you make a noise at and he goes on to tell you their plans.

"We have the launch codes to alter the helicarrier Insight targets. They all must be put in for them to work," Maria explains. "I'll be in the control room, while Sam and Steve put the chips into the systems on all three ships." You assume she still can't believe she's talking to an oversized coyote, who nods after her statement, but she doesn't let it show.

Maria brings her pack off her shoulders and places it on the ground as she kneels, "Natasha told me to bring extra clothes, just in case, and she didn't say for what. But now that I see you, I guess I know now." The pack opens and there's a pile of clothes in it, tac-gear that may be a little big, but you could make it work, a pair of boots and a holster with a gun.

Steve and Sam turn around after Maria shows you the clothes, and you shift. Maria makes a noise of surprise and swiftly turns around to let you get dressed.

As you put the new underwear and sports bra on, you notice a long jagged scar along your stomach. That must be where they pulled the bullet out of and stitched you up. You prod it and it stings, more than it should you think, and hiss in pain.

Steve glances over his shoulder warily and notices the pink scar on your back that matches the one on the front, "was that from the bullet?"

"Must be," you mumble. You twist your body to look at the scar on your back, “I don’t remember the bullet going through me though…” Steve gives you a worried look, but you shrug it off.

You pull the jumpsuit up over your legs, then your torso, and push your arms through. It’s similar to Maria’s, you notice, a deep blue one piece jumpsuit with a SHIELD logo on the left shoulder. It’s a little baggy on your frame, and you roll up the sleeves to your elbows and to your shins, then shove your feet into the boots. The gun holster goes around your waist, and you check the ammunition in the pistol before putting it away.

“Where do you need me?” You ask, following Steve once he sees you’re finished getting dressed. Your group ascends the stairs to the control room’s floor, you keep pace with Steve, Maria behind you and Sam bringing up the rear.

Steve looks down at you for a moment as he thinks, “Stay with Maria,” he says, and then raises a hand as you go to object, “please, I can’t be out there worried about you again,” he places his hand on your shoulder. So you relent and nod, the serious look on Steve’s face makes you think better of disagreeing with Captain America.

Your group comes to a halt outside the control room door, you can hear chatter on the inside. Maria brings out ear comms for you, Steve and Sam, then she pressed a button on what looks like a controller. You can hear a screeching noise and people yelling in surprise. Then Steve uses his shield to knock on the door, a loud clang sounds out against the metal door.

Sam and Maria step forward on either side of Steve with their guns drawn. You bare your claws, your hands and forearms sprouting fur as your claws come out.

The door opens revealing an agent rubbing at his ear and when he sees your group, he goes to grab his gun but Steve holds up a hand to stop him. A low growl leaves your throat as Sam and Maria take aim at him.

"Excuse us,” Steve says and walks through the door once the tech steps to the side. You follow Sam and Maria in, Maria makes a move with her gun and the rest of the techs in the room make a run for the exit.

Once the last person leaves, and it's just your group left, Maria goes to the console and types a few commands, then steps to the side and hands the mic for the intercom system over to Steve.

He leans down to hold the button, and in his Captain America voice (you like to call it) he takes a deep breath, “Attention, all SHIELD agents. This is Steve Rogers. You’ve heard a lot about me over the last few days, some of you were even ordered to hunt me down, but I think it’s time for you to know the truth,” he looks back at your group, and you give him an encouraging nod before he continues. “SHIELD is not what we thought it was, it’s been taken over by HYDRA. Alexander Pierce is their leader. They could be standing right next to you.

“They almost have what they want: absolute control. They shot Nick Fury, and it won’t end there. If you launch those Helicarriers today, HYDRA will be able to kill anyone that stands in their way, unless we stop them.

“I know I'm asking a lot, but the price of freedom is high, it always has been. And it's a price I’m willing to pay, and if I’m the only one, then so be it. But I’m willing to bet I’m not.”

You swear you have chills from Steve’s big speech, there’s a wide grin on your face as Steve stands back up to his full height.

“Did you write that down first, or was that off the top of your head?” Sam grins, and elbows you when you giggle at him.

Maria makes her way up to the control console, wheeling over a chair and placing a headset on her head. She hits a switch on the headset, “Channel 3, secure,” you can hear her in the ear piece she gave the group.

Steve gives a nod, he and Sam make their way to the exit to put their override chips in the Helicarriers. Before they reach the door, you grab their hands, one of their hands in one of yours. They both stop and look down at you.

“Be careful, both of you,” you say and give their hands a squeeze. They hug you from the side, Steve a little longer than Sam. “He’s in there, Steve,” you tell him softly, he inhales sharply and gives you another squeeze before he lets you go. “Promise me you’ll both come back in one piece, ok?”

With one final nod, both Steve and Sam are out the door.

-*-

You’re sitting next to Maria, trying not to seem anxious or bother her from her monitoring the camera feeds and the progress on the Helicarriers launch. Then you feel a sharp pain in your right leg, it feels like you’ve been stabbed, but no blood is oozing out when you pull your hand away.

“What is it?” Maria asks you, her brows pulled together as she looks you over. You shake your head, gritting your teeth through the pain. Then another searing pain shoots through you on your left shoulder, and you cry out and fall to the floor. “Talk to me, what’s going on? Cap?" Maria brings her hand to her ear to get Steve's attention.

“No. It-it's fine. I-I don’t know,” you grit out, “feels like I was stab— oh no, Leon,” you look up at Maria and she rolls back over to the console, typing away and changing surveillance cameras around SHIELD. You make your way over to her, peering over her shoulder as the footage scrolls by. Then you see him, in a stairwell on the other side of the building, and you point to one of the monitors, “There! That’s him. I’m going to get him,” you adjust the holster on your hip and jog to the far side of the room to the opposite exit you all entered from.

Maria calls your name and you turn back to her, “Be careful, the last thing I need is an earful from Cap,” and she winks. You smile and nod at her and continue out the door.

“Eight minutes, Cap,” you can hear Maria say over comms.

“Working on it,” Steve replies, he seems out of breath, only a little.

The pain in your shoulder and leg are persistent as you race down the corridor that leads you to the stairwell you’re sure your brother is in. When you burst through the metal door for the stairs you can smell the copper scent of blood, you run to the railing and look down.

“Leon!” You yell, and it echoes. You go to call again but you hear something above you, so you sprint up the stairs three at a time until you see a trail of blood at the base of a set of stairs. “Oh, Gods.”

Two flights up, Leon is on the floor, leaning against a door, one hand gripping his leg above a knife sticking out of it, and the other slung over himself to barely stop the bleeding from his shoulder. You rush to him then, almost slipping in the pool of blood that has gathered around him. Your hands are frantic as you can’t decide what to do with them, wondering if you should even touch him yet.

“Sunny, baby, can you hear me?” You reach out and graze your fingers along his cheek, his eyes flutter open and his head lolls to the side. He smells like anything but sunshine and roses now. His sweet scent is marred by copper and burnt leaves.

When he sees you, he lets out a weak laugh, a slow smile making it onto his handsome face, “Kn-knew you’d be ok, Fl-flowers,” he says slowly. You can see blood on his teeth, “Fel-felt the bullet rip right through me,” he lifts a bloodied hand up to your face and you grasp it, and lean into his touch.

"What can I do, Sunny? We have to stop the bleeding," you go to take hold of the knife still lodged in his leg but the small whimper that leaves his lips makes you pause. "Sunny-"

"It's…silver," he huffs out. Your eyes go wide and you pull your hand back. “Sorry about the pain,” he grimaces, and you let out a humorless chuckle.

“I don’t give a shit about the pain, Leon, I’m worried about you!” And without another word you lean forward and yank the knife from his leg, you both yell out in pain. You throw the knife over the railing behind you and rip a piece of Leon’s shirt off to wrap around his leg. “Let’s get you moving,” and you lift his uninjured arm over your shoulders and lift him up, his whines in protest but you could care less. Your first priority is getting Leon to safety, everything and everyone else could wait.

“Flowers, what about Insight, and —“

“Please, Sunny, you’re always my first priority,” you tell him as you make your way down the stairwell to the ground floor. So far you’ve tuned out what was happening outside with Steve and Sam, you can’t think about them right now.

“Falcon, Flowers?” Maria says over the comms. You come to a halt in the middle of the stairs. Leon barely notices when you do, all his weight is on you and you adjust him slightly.

“Yeah?” Sam replies.

“Here, what is it, Hill?”

“Rumlow’s headed for the Council,” she says. There’s a beat and Sam answers before you can and you sigh in relief.

“Take care of that brother of yours girly, we got this.”

“Thanks, Sammy, I owe you,” you tell him, and you guide Leon back down the stairs. You’re at floor 30 when Leon asks you to take a breather, you set him down and he leans his head against the wall. At least the bleeding stopped on his leg, you think. His shoulder is a little worse for wear, but most of the blood has stopped oozing now. You brush the hair out of Leon’s face, and he drags his eyes up to your face, it almost seems it takes all his strength to do so.

“How ya feeling, baby brother?” You ask him, and he gives you a lazy smile. His eyes shift to the side and he sits up straight, a forced growl rumbles his chest and the hair on the back of your neck stands on end. When you turn to see what Leon’s looking at, you see Rumlow on the landing below you. His gun is raised as he makes eye contact with you, his eyes squint and he frowns. You put yourself in front of your brother as Rumlow ascends the stairs, lowering yourself in a defensive stance. Your claws come out and fur ripples through from your fingers to your elbow and your eyes glow bright.

“Not another step, asshole,” you growled. Rumlow is a few steps away from you, he raises his hands, gun in his right and finger off the trigger. He steps to get around you and you growl again.

“Easy, easy,” he hedges, “easy there, girl. I’m not sure how you got out of the vault or away from the Asset, but it won't matter much soon,” he smirks. He gets around you and slowly backs up the stairs away from you and Leon. You let him go, you can’t put your brother in any more danger than he is.

After Rumlow is out of sight, you get Leon back to his feet and help him down the stairs again. You exit on floor 25 and decide the elevator would be the best to get the hell out of SHIELD HQ as fast as you could. You’re about half way down when you turn your ear comm back on.

“People are gona die, Buck. I can’t let that happen…Please, don’t make me do this.” Steve pleads. And it hurts to hear him sound so defeated, he really doesn’t want to fight the Soldier, you could tell.

“What’s happening up there?” Leon asks as he looks out the elevator. You join him and lean your head on his shoulder. The helicarriers are rapidly ascending in the sky, and you hope Steve can get the last chip in before it's too late.

“They’re fighting,” you tell him. You can hear the fighting in your ear, Steve struggling in his fight with his best friend-turned-mind-controlled-assassin. You turn to face Leon as the elevator nears the ground floor and you’re determined to tell him who the Soldier is.

“30 seconds, Cap!”

“Stand by. Charlie…-“ a gunshot goes off in your ear and you squeak in surprise, whipping around to look up at the Helicarrier you think Steve is on.

You put your finger to your ear, “Steve!? Steve, are you ok? Oh, Gods.” After a few moments you can hear his grunt as he begins to move. The elevator has reached the lobby but you make no effort to move. Your brother crowds in you on and wraps his uninjured arm around you.

“Ch-Charlie locked,” Steve says weakly into the comms, and you sigh in relief, leaning into Leon.

“Ok, Cap, get out of there,” Maria says, you can hear her frantic typing.

“Fire now,” Steve replies.

“But, Steve…”

“Do it! Do it now!”

“Steven Grant! You promised me!” You yell, tears forming in the corner of your eyes.

Steve says your name softly, and you sniffle back a sob, a tear escaping, “I can’t leave him,” he says, you hear shuffling and then the sound of Steve crushing his earpiece. A moment later the helicarriers begin opening fire on each other.

“No…” you place a hand on the glass, staring wide eyed up at the destruction.

“Flow, we gotta go,” Leon grips your shoulders to lead you out of the elevator and you relent. You wipe the tears from your eyes and help Leon jog as best he can away from HQ and the fire raining down from the sky just outside.

“You should Shift, it’ll be easier for you to run that way,” you tell him as you shoulder the back exit door open. Leon gives you a look and you roll your eyes. “I can keep up with you just fine like this. Do it.” Now he rolls his eyes at you, but he agrees. He Shifts, and you can hear his bones crack into place trying to heal his wounds.

You forgot how much bigger his form is than yours when he Shifts, you run to keep up with him, you both make your way across the bridge behind the Triskelion. You can hear explosions above you and try your best not to pay them any attention. You can’t let yourself think of Steve or Bucky still on one of those Helicarriers.

When you get across the bridge, you look back, and when you do a hellicarrier just crashes into the building. You go to reach for your earpiece, but it’s gone. It must have fallen out while you were running and you hadn’t noticed. There’s a tug on your sleeve and you look over to your brother, his eyes look worried as he looks at you. You place a hand on his head and nod towards the river.

“Let’s head up river, try and stay off the main road for now,” you tell him, you both make your way to the riverbank, putting as much distance between you and the burning remains of SHIELD as you can. “We can head back to your apartment, get some things together, and get the hell out of D.C..” Leon snorts at you as he trots beside you. “Oh yeah? You got a better idea, smart ass?” You nudge him with your hip.

-*-

You’re a few miles up river when you see a silver gleam out the corner of your eye, and when you turn your head you can see the Soldier walking towards you, his head turned down. He looks soaking wet and you wonder if he swam all the way from SHIELD to here. And then you see a lump of blue further up the riverbank.

“Steve!” You shout and run to him. You must have startled the Soldier because you hear his metal arm whir to life and his stance becomes defensive as you near him. Leon’s a few steps behind you and he growls. You come to a stop a few feet from the soldier and raise your hands up. “Do you remember me?” You ask, and he studies you for a moment, his nose flares, and he nods his head once, and he looks over at your brother who is still growling. You can see the soldier is favoring his left side, his right arm tucked tight into his side, he must have hurt it when he and Steve were fighting.

“Are you ok?” You ask him, the soldier’s brows crease and he stares wide eyed at you like you said something he’s never heard before. There’s a nudge to your hand and you place it on your brother's head. “This is Leon,” you tell the Soldier. “My brother.” The soldier just shifts on his feet, still wary of you both. “I’m going to go check on Steve now,” you say slowly, and take a step forward, Leon hasn’t stopped the low growl since you came upon the Soldier.

“Take care of yourself, James,” you say softly as you pass him by, he doesn’t acknowledge you and begins to make his way down stream and through a field before you lose sight of him. You rush to Steve’s side, he’s soaking wet and it looks like he's coughed up water. There’s cuts all over his face and bruises forming, you’re sure his right eye is swollen shut and his cheekbone is shattered. There’s blood stains around what looks like a bullet hole in his stomach, and you press your hand down on it.

“Steve, can you hear me?” You brush his hair back gently, his eyes flutter but they don’t open. You can hear a helicopter in the distance, and you look up to find it making its way in your direction. “Hold on, honey, help’s on the way.”

-*-

AN: Thank you for taking the time to read this hot mess of a story!! It means so much to me!

[nomadstucky]

Desperate

Title: Desperate  Pairing: Steve Rogers x Female Reader  Summary: Steve tries to convince the team he isn’t in love with you. But he can only do so much.  Warnings; mentions of wounds, fluff, I think that’s it, please let me know if I missed anything!!  Word Count: 995

A/N: Thank you to @maysdigitalarts for the banners, and a huge shoutout to @universitypenguin for the amazing beta reading. <3

If you wish to be on my taglist, you can do so here, or use the ask! If you'd like to send a request, you can send an ask, or use the form here!

Minors DNI, and Please put your age in your bio if you wish to not be blocked. Thanks!

The first incident happened at one of Tony’s parties. 

Tony had made it quite clear that your attendance wasn’t optional. Tony always packed these parties and he expected each and every Avenger to make an appearance. It was ‘good publicity’ as he would constantly tell everyone. Everyone knew this was just a way for Tony to show off.  You had chosen a royal purple satin dress with an A-line skirt. There was a thigh-high slit in the skirt, along the left side. Natasha had styled your hair into an updo and Wanda had worked her magic, but not literally, turning your face into a work of art. 

You weren’t much for fancy parties, fancy dresses, or fancy anything. You wanted to be seen by Tony, fulfill your obligations, and head back to your room. Little did you know, Steve had his eyes on you. His eyes truly could not leave your frame as you walked around the expansive ballroom. 

It irritated Steve to an unreasonable extent to see people flirt with you. On the same side of the coin, he felt his chest bloom when he realized you were turning them down. 

Sam approached him. “Why don’t you go talk to her?” 

Steve jumped, nearly dropping the glass in his hand. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Steve said, trying desperately to hide the tint to his cheeks at being caught. Sam clapped his hand on Steve’s shoulder. Steve took a long, slow sip of the alcohol in his glass to avoid talking. 

“She’s into you too you know.” Sam smirked, watching the way Steve’s eyes widened. It was hard at this point to deny the obvious. Steve coughed, and tried not to choke on the drink. 

“Again, I have no clue what you’re talking about. I’m not ‘into’ anyone. Now, if you’ll excuse me…” Steve sat his glass down and walked off. Sam just smirked watching as his friend escaped to the elevator, but not before looking at you one final time. Sam knew it was only a matter of time. 

The second incident happened almost two weeks after the first one. Steve was quietly eating at the breakfast bar, watching Natasha cook.You walked in, hair still damp from the shower, and smiled at Natasha.

“Just a coffee please” You said, taking the seat beside Steve. 

Natasha smiled, poured the coffee and sat it down in front of you. You hadn’t noticed Steve tense up at first, not until after Bucky questioned him. 

“You alright pal?” Bucky spoke in a hushed tone, as to only draw Steve’s attention. 

Steve nodded back in response, not trusting his voice.

You leaned into Steve’s space, noting the clench of his jaw at your sudden proximity. 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” 

Steve gave a reassuring smile and nodded. You leaned back and turn to speak with Natasha, still tracking the soldier from the corner of your eye.

The third incident, he couldn’t deny it anymore. No one could. You had been hurt. You had a broken wrist, and were shot in the shoulder, and thigh. 

It wasn’t looking good for you. When you landed, medics wheeled you down to the trauma bay.

Steve sat in the main waiting area, wringing his hands waiting for news.

It came a few hours later. They were able to stabilize you. The doctor stepped out into the main waiting area, ready to deliver the good news that you were doing well, and awake. 

"Fantastic," Tony said, heaving a sigh.

"Is she awake?" Natasha asked.

"Was there any damage to her rotator cuff?" Bruce said.

Steve spoke over the others, interrupting the influx of questions. "Can I see her?"

The doctor nodded, “Of course. There’s only one person allowed in the room at a time.. Safety reasons.” He explained. He paused and scanned the others' faces for any objections. When no one did, he led Steve to your room. 

Steve only smiled after he opened the door. Your gaze snapped up to him, smiling as he whispered, “Hey there.” 

Steve stepped in and shut the door behind him. You croaked out a small “hi.” He walked over to your bed, noticing all the machinery. 

Carefully, he sat in the chair beside your bed. “How’re you feeling?” Steve asked, as he kept his voice low. 

“It felt like I got hit with a baseball bat.. Then the pain set in.” You giggled, and looked up at him. “How are you feeling?” You questioned. 

Steve knew he looked worse than he felt, but all he could think about was you. He couldn’t get the image of you, battered and bloodied, out of his head. “You scared me.” He whispered. 

You felt a pang of guilt strike you. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” 

You reached down slightly, to the cord attached to the bed. There was a little gray button labeled ‘up’ written on it and you pressed it, lifting the backrest to an upright position. Steve’s eyes widened and his gaze fluttered towards the nursing station. “I’m fine - really. There were hostages. I couldn’t just…” 

Steve shook his head, “No no don’t.. It’s alright. Just rest now okay?” He said. You smiled. “You know, even hooked up to the machines, you’re still gorgeous..” He said and blushed. You giggled. 

“Thank you.” You said. You looked down at your hands in your lap. Your hands seemed to be preoccupied picking at nails, as the air became heavy. 

Steve was determined to push through. “I-I was kinda hoping that maybe after.. If there’s an option.. Maybe when you’re able to be on your feet… only if you wanted to of course.. Uhm.. maybe we could..” He rambled - you knew where he was going. He looked so cute with his cheeks tinted pink, twisting his fingers. 

You put him out of his misery, “I would love to.” 

Steve let out a breath, “great!” 

Now you had even more reason to want to heal sooner. 

[thompsborn]

Hello!!! i’m so interested in the HB2 plot! I feel like we see peter angst way more commonly than Harley—so if you ever feel up for rambling about it under a cut or a spoiler tag this is a free space to do so! He really is my blorbo and you’re my favorite fic writer so I know whatever happens it’ll be amazingly done but I’m dying for hints at more of what that’ll look like! Are we talking, like, caught in the literal crossfire or devastating hostage situation 😂

okay before i do the harley rambles i!? I’m your favorite fic writer??? my guy what the FUCK that’s so sweet but also have u read any of sarah’s fics?? oddy’s parkner fic or oddy’s parksborn fic??? ANY of the Classic Iconic parkner fics circa 2020-2021?

i’m actually very VERY slowly making a parkner fic rec list to post at some point but just. WHAT. there are So many INCREDIBLE fic writers and saying i’m your favorite is BONKERS to me but also so nice i ??? thank you??? oh my god???? ❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙

okay anyway sorry to what the ask was actually about pfkfj, HARLEY!!! i agree it’s definitely a lot easier to come across peter angst than harley angst, which most likely has to do with the fact that there is a LOT of material to draw from for peter’s character—various movies, comics, shows, timelines and universes and the games. it’s a lot easier to come up with angst for peter because there’s a lot of canon angst to choose from AND there’s so much content for him that it’s a lot easier to get a grasp on his character and create angst based on that, you know? but as a fandom we have definitely created many ideas of harley based on when he was a kid in im3 and his cameo in endgame, plus the WEB comics + ride at avengers campus, so harley angst is for sure out there but like you said it is NOT easy to come across lmao

as for the HB2 plot—i have an ask in my drafts from like a month or two ago asking for more information about hb2 and i’m gonna try to finally finish answering that and post it sometime today, so that post will definitely include some insight in what to expect from the sequel, but harley in hb2 specifically? i GOTCHU.

OKAY !!! let's do this!!

so homeward bound, as i've said before, is PETER'S story post no way home, right? but in hb2 it's peter AND HARLEY'S story post homeward bound. the first chapter is a recap of the first fic from harley's pov with a lot of extra bits thrown in, starting on the day that thanos first snapped and ending either where the first fic ends or maybe in the summer between school years. unsure as of now but one of those, for sure. so that's going to offer a lot of perspective about harley's character in homeward bound - his thought processes, how he was feeling in a lot of key moments during the first fic, things he was doing while peter wasn't around, etc etc etc.

but in hb2, after the recap in the first fic, it picks up at the start of their second year at ESU. he might still be roommates with harry. he might not be. it won't be the same room at the very least, so no matter what, there's going to be some changes, right? but also:

everything is different.

there are the small changes - not the same room, harder classes as they climb their way through the pre-reqs, potentially a different roommate, some stuff happened over summer, etc.

but also there are the BIG changes, like his dynamic with peter, and knowing that peter is spidey and now being a part of keeping that a secret due to peter not wanting anyone else to know. he also knows about the spell and he knows that peter is someone tony loved, someone that pepper and morgan and happy and rhodey knew and cared about, and none of them remember him, but they know harley.

with harley's pov comes the reintroduction of the rest of the world, basically. peter has no one, right? his old life was completely destroyed and erased, leaving no connections to the people he used to know, so he's been VERY closed off from everyone and everything.

harley, however, still knows pepper and morgan and happy and rhodey. he still talks to them on a regular basis. he has his mom and his sister. he isn't closed off in classes like peter is, actually having conversations with his classmates, even if he has no interest in befriending them. peter's pov has been very limited because his world has been completely changed. harley's has been changed too via the loss of tony and him being dead for five years while his mom and his sister had to adapt to a life without him there, but it's not been changed to the extent of peter's, you know?

harley is going to have a few struggles in hb2, some centered around peter, some not. there's going to be family stuff. there's going to be this urge to tell pepper and them about peter because he thinks that peter would benefit from having these people in his life again but also he wants to respect the fact that peter doesn't feel ready to do that.

there's going to be some conflict about the people in his life learning that he's involved with spider-man's business somehow. there's going to be people getting angry at spider-man because of it.

a lot of mental and emotional turmoil is going to come out of all this. but, in the physical sense, he's not going to be entirely safe, either. again, people are going to realize he's somehow connected to spidey. he's going to want to do whatever he can do to help peter, to the point where he's going to get a little reckless with it sometimes.

caught in the crossfire? yeah.

hostage situation? no. at least, not in hb2. not that i currently have planned. that could change, but as of my current plans, no.

hope that's enough information to build some intrigue >:)

[nomadbabes]

Title: Desperate 

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Female Reader 

Summary: Steve tries to convince the team he isn’t in love with you. But he can only do so much. 

Warnings; mentions of wounds, fluff, I think that’s it, please let me know if I missed anything!! 

Rating: 🌩✨

18+ MINORS DNI - Massive Thank you to @maysdigitalarts !! For the banners!! ❤️

The first incident happened at one of Tony’s parties. 

Tony had made it quite clear that your attendance wasn’t optional. Tony always packed these parties and he expected each and every Avenger to make an appearance. It was ‘good publicity’ as he would constantly tell everyone. Everyone knew this was just a way for Tony to show off.  You had chosen a royal purple satin dress with an A-line skirt. There was a thigh-high slit in the skirt, along the left side. Natasha had styled your hair into an updo and Wanda had worked her magic, but not literally, turning your face into a work of art. 

You weren’t much for fancy parties, fancy dresses, or fancy anything. You wanted to be seen by Tony, fulfill your obligations, and head back to your room. Little did you know, Steve had his eyes on you. His eyes truly could not leave your frame as you walked around the expansive ballroom. 

It irritated Steve to an unreasonable extent to see people flirt with you. On the same side of the coin, he felt his chest bloom when he realized you were turning them down. 

Sam approached him. “Why don’t you go talk to her?” 

Steve jumped, nearly dropping the glass in his hand. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Steve said, trying desperately to hide the tint to his cheeks at being caught. Sam clapped his hand on Steve’s shoulder. Steve took a long, slow sip of the alcohol in his glass to avoid talking. 

“She’s into you too you know.” Sam smirked, watching the way Steve’s eyes widened. It was hard at this point to deny the obvious. Steve coughed, and tried not to choke on the drink. 

“Again, I have no clue what you’re talking about. I’m not ‘into’ anyone. Now, if you’ll excuse me…” Steve sat his glass down and walked off. Sam just smirked watching as his friend escaped to the elevator, but not before looking at you one final time. Sam knew it was only a matter of time. 

The second incident happened almost two weeks after the first one. Steve was quietly eating at the breakfast bar, watching Natasha cook.You walked in, hair still damp from the shower, and smiled at Natasha.

“Just a coffee please” You said, taking the seat beside Steve. 

Natasha smiled, poured the coffee and sat it down in front of you. You hadn’t noticed Steve tense up at first, not until after Bucky questioned him. 

“You alright pal?” Bucky spoke in a hushed tone, as to only draw Steve’s attention. 

Steve nodded back in response, not trusting his voice.

You leaned into Steve’s space, noting the clench of his jaw at your sudden proximity. 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” 

Steve gave a reassuring smile and nodded. You leaned back and turn to speak with Natasha, still tracking the soldier from the corner of your eye.

The third incident, he couldn’t deny it anymore. No one could. You had been hurt. You had a broken wrist, and were shot in the shoulder, and thigh. 

It wasn’t looking good for you. When you landed, medics wheeled you down to the trauma bay.

Steve sat in the main waiting area, wringing his hands waiting for news.

It came a few hours later. They were able to stabilize you. The doctor stepped out into the main waiting area, ready to deliver the good news that you were doing well, and awake. 

"Fantastic," Tony said, heaving a sigh.

"Is she awake?" Natasha asked.

"Was there any damage to her rotator cuff?" Bruce said.

Steve spoke over the others, interrupting the influx of questions. "Can I see her?"

The doctor nodded, “Of course. There’s only one person allowed in the room at a time.. Safety reasons.” He explained. He paused and scanned the others' faces for any objections. When no one did, he led Steve to your room. 

Steve only smiled after he opened the door. Your gaze snapped up to him, smiling as he whispered, “Hey there.” 

Steve stepped in and shut the door behind him. You croaked out a small “hi.” He walked over to your bed, noticing all the machinery. 

Carefully, he sat in the chair beside your bed. “How’re you feeling?” Steve asked, as he kept his voice low. 

“It felt like I got hit with a baseball bat.. Then the pain set in.” You giggled, and looked up at him. “How are you feeling?” You questioned. 

Steve knew he looked worse than he felt, but all he could think about was you. He couldn’t get the image of you, battered and bloodied, out of his head. “You scared me.” He whispered. 

You felt a pang of guilt strike you. 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to.” 

You reached down slightly, to the cord attached to the bed. There was a little gray button labeled ‘up’ written on it and you pressed it, lifting the backrest to an upright position. Steve’s eyes widened and his gaze fluttered towards the nursing station. “I’m fine - really. There were hostages. I couldn’t just…” 

Steve shook his head, “No no don’t.. It’s alright. Just rest now okay?” He said. You smiled. “You know, even hooked up to the machines, you’re still gorgeous..” He said and blushed. You giggled. 

“Thank you.” You said. You looked down at your hands in your lap. Your hands seemed to be preoccupied picking at nails, as the air became heavy. 

Steve was determined to push through. “I-I was kinda hoping that maybe after.. If there’s an option.. Maybe when you’re able to be on your feet… only if you wanted to of course.. Uhm.. maybe we could..” He rambled - you knew where he was going. He looked so cute with his cheeks tinted pink, twisting his fingers. 

You put him out of his misery, “I would love to.” 

Steve let out a breath, “great!” 

Now you had even more reason to want to heal sooner. 

[hawkstincan]

okay, this is a long time overdue I guess, but I finally feel like I need a pin post. about me, this blog, my ships and all these jazz  (slow requests are open)

I came here from a space similar to a livejournal. so this blog is just a blog about whatever. if I feel like posting my old drawings, I will be posting my old drawings. or some whining about irl. or about a movie I just watched. I thought about making an art blog but I'm too lazy for this. and i’ll forget to relog anyway.  

quite obvious english is not my first language and if i’m making little sense or some stupid mistaces it must be because of it.

that's also the reason why I am usually so slow with replies. it’s scary to communicate in my first language and even scarier in english. I am bad at communication altogether if I’m honest. but I'm trying to do my best though (on AO3 too).      

I’m open for requests right now. BUT it is a slow (VERY SLOW it may take me literal YEARS) process because I'm dealing with some mental issues, artblock, little energy and little free time. 

if you want gifs tho… I find gif-making a very relaxing and soothing process and I will gladly make something for you. faster too xD 

I do not let go of a fandom I once loved. I just can’t even when I want to.

I’m always back and forth.

I’m very attached to the voice of a character. I hate dubbing. no matter how good it’s done. I want to hear original voices. if I watch anime it’s always with subs. I usually fall for characters with unusual or distinctive voices or intonations or speech patterns. 

and don’t get me started on singing! I'll never shut up! I LOVED ALL MUSICAL EPISODES I’D EVER SAW! ALL OF THEM! 

Glee? i was ecstatic xD

I prefer to read low rated fics. I’m not that interested in sex scenes and high rating is almost always is about sex. so why bother and waste my time on something I'm not really interested in? I will read explicit and mature rated stories from the writers I love. because I have been reading them for years and I know I love their writing. tho I most likely skip pwp no matter what. 

I can’t read d/s. even when it’s just undertones. freaks me out. just… not my thing. I tried several times.  

What I mostly read at the moment:

flaffowverse

coldflash, awww, my first otp ever flashwave, Len must be a good friend coldflashwave, harrisco, hartmon, goldenvibe, heatfrost (if I remember correctly) I can read mostly any other ships if they are not breaking up coldflash, and from some writers I can read ships even when they break coldflash up (that’s very rare and new for me)   

marvel

ironwinter, ironhawk, Phil/Clint, clintasha, winterhawk, pepperony, frostiron, ironstrange I’m a big Tony and Clint lover, if they are there and happy I most likely read and be happy with it.

merlin bbc

merwaine just merwaine. because i saw Gwaine and was done. Gwaine stole my heart from his first appearance. 

9-1-1

buddie come on! they should be canon by now! 

buffy the vampire slayer 

spuffy i was into spuffy before i even saw the show. i went and watched it because of spuffy 

person of interest 

rinch I never thought I'd be reading anything in poi fandom… I was so wrong xD 

teen wolf

steter, sterek Stiles was the best thing in that forsaken show. don’t get me wrong — I love it. I just know it was never near perfect. or even good after season 3

our flag means death

blackbonnet

mha

bkdk anything nice and fluffy with Tokoyami 

knb

all of it i guess? i’m in the fandom since 2015 and i think i read all the ships there at some point xD 

reborn

… let’s say Varia and Gokudera. details aren’t all that important 

spn

destiel cas’s confession brought me back to watching after… long pause

star trek

sponse, spirck that’s all I can remember right now. i’ll update it if something comes up

hanibal

hannigram i had zero chances there. they are just that good

ted lasso

tedependent god help me i though i was out of the woods with this fandom. but those two are so good together! James Lance is something else <3

shows which i love deeply and open to talk about, to watch with you through discord or something, to screech at you about in any given moment, just lovelovelovelove

all mentioned above, m*a*s*h, the sanctuary, grimm (i’ll be reading Sean-related fics veery soon), castle (salty rents about last two seasons included), grey’s anatomy, er, ME (game but it’s one of my biggest obsessions!), friends, black blood brothers, hellsing, dbh, dbd, schitt's creek, from dusk till dawn, forever, house, unusuals, dr. horrible's sing-along blog, leverage, firefly, izombie, h-50, old guard, army of thieves, lost in space, kingdom (with Frank Grillo), travelers, flight of dragons, our flags means death, yellowstone, star trek, all of us are dead, skymed (NOVAK my gosh), drive angry, blow dry, gentlemen, hell on wheels, scream, criminal minds, znation

those are just stuff I could remember. I watch lots of shit at work. feel free to ask if I watched something. there is always a chance that I watched it xD    

I guess that’s all for now. I may add something later. or fix the message a bit. we’ll see

[daredevilexchange]

Want to be featured here? Head to this page and fill in the form!

See what this is about here, or if you’re using the app here.

What’s your fannish ID? In most spaces (ao3, twitter, etc) you can find me under thelonebamf which is a handle I've had for //checks watch// over twenty years now and has a laughable origin that as far as I know predates the B.A.M.F. acronym, but guess who looked like a total d-bag on forums for years lol. Anyways, yeah, I've been lost in the Marvel sauce for literal decades now. Here on tumblr you can find me at @amazing-spiderling which is kind of a mishmash of one of the names Tony gives Peter in Civil War that I thought was funny.

What types of fanworks do you create? I dabble in creating fanart, comics, fics, and have made one fanmix and would probably do more if my taste in music was better. I have also smooshed all those interests together to run a small ask blog! I have run zines and events in other fandoms and would probably like to take a stab at that when irl calms down a little for me. :)

What are your favourite types of fanworks, when you’re not creating? I consume a lot of fanfic, pretty much every night before bed. XD I've just started getting into listening to podfics more recently. I love fanmixes especially when I'm trying to get some inspiration for a ship and want to get a feel for how other people interpreted the pairing. Gives you a little perspective. And who doesn't love some adorable fanart of their faves? Fan videos are great, but probably even better when you're watching them with your fandom friends and yelling over the internet. XD Oh, and when I see a full fledged fan comic, I pretty much lose my mind.

What do you like in particular about this fandom? I am pretty myopic when it comes to fandoms and ships. I'm usually there for one character/one ship only. In this case, I am here (the DD/Defenders fandom) for MattFoggy goodness exclusively. Of course since the two characters have SO much history, and are incapable of existing outside each other's orbits, canon has presented us with so many delightful and entertaining versions of their partnership to play with. Goodness knows I've fallen deep down the Earth-65 (Spider-Gwen) hole with these two and am likely never to crawl out. Oops. I love a good regular canon story too, and I'm happy to devour any AU a fic throws at me.

Do you like participating in fan events? I really enjoy doing fandom events and collaborations! I think I leaned into it pretty hard when I first started creating for the Daredevil fandom because it felt like if I was doing an exchange or a bang, then I was making something that at least one person was going to be into. Also, I have found that in most cases, it's a great way to meet people and make friends. I am one of those people that loves to pick my partner's brain, and likewise offer suggestions when needed. Sometimes you really hit that stride with each other and it makes you both that much more excited to work on the thing, and that's awesome. FRENS!

What about your creating process? If I'm writing, I find other words really distracting, but I also find it hard to work in silence. Coffee shop music is usually okay because it's not right in my face, but if I'm at home (god, when was the last time I worked in a coffee shop…) I need to have a more chill ambient thing going on. I put on a lot of lo-fi and vaporwave mixes when I need to make words be go. TBH I am SUCH a Goldilocks when it comes to writing. The vibe needs to be right, I need to have a plan in mind, my chair needs to be comfy… etc etc. At least when I do get down to it, I can smash out the words pretty quickly, just getting to that point can take some finesse. XD

If I'm drawing, it's another thing entirely. I tend to put on television, but it has to be something that I've either seen before (so I'm not worried about looking at the screen) or something that is really low stakes (youtube people reviewing snacks or something). I think I actually prefer people talking to music for art times… usually. It can just depend on what I'm working on.

Do you interact a lot with other fans? I am on discord... way too much, and pretty much have one foot in the Avocados server during all of my waking hours- which is great. I've made some really good friends there! [get in touch with lonebamf for info about the Avocados server!] Other than that, I always make an effort to comment on people's posts on other platforms where I feel like that kind of engagement is lacking (fanart on twitter/instagram) because I know how much I enjoy encouragement. Of course my inbox is always open here (and on the askblog, duh) in case anyone ever wants to pick my brain.

Do you have other fandoms you'd like to talk about? I am VERY slow to shift fandoms/ships (and never really leave, tbh), so my list is not very long. The most relevant one to mention would be Spideypool (and Spider-Man as a whole). I even did a podcast about Spider-Man and some of his wilder exploits called "Was Spider-Man There?" where my non-comic reading friend would make up a wild situation and I would have to figure out if it ever happened in canon. Good times. I also spent a lot of time in the Metal Gear Solid Snake/Otacon fandom because I guess there's just something in my DNA that makes me love "trained soldier who has the skillz to pay the billz and his dorky best friend and they make each other better people" as a ship dynamic.

Is there any particular piece you'd like to showcase for this post? So I love my askblog and my comics but the thing I want to point at with big neon flashing arrows is this fanfic I did for a recent server exchange called "The Indictment of Sick Jan" which is an Earth-65 fic about DA Nelson attending a holiday party Matt has invited him to against his better judgement. I really love writing Murderdock and their interactions and hope to get some more fics like this out there, but this is what I have to share for now! I would love it if more people checked it out! https://archiveofourown.org/works/36828508

Also, just saying, but you can also find all of my askblog comics crossposted to my ao3, just in case you want to read the whole thing in chronological order, or leave a comment with real talky words for me. <3

Is there anything else you want to tell us about yourself? I have two very cute pups and every day is a struggle not to use that new tumblr blaze feature to force thousands of people to look at pictures of them being cute. [Puppy pics below]

[ID: A collage of two dog photos. On the right is a tan Pomeranian, lying on a wood floor with his paws in front of him, head slightly tilted and wearing a smile. The photo is decorated with a pink thought bubble with a bone in it. This is Bijou and he is a very good boy. On the left is a small mixed breed dog, standing in dry grass. Her coat is neatly trimmed and entirely black except for the tip of her muzzle and her toes. She is also smiling at the camera and has goofy triangle ears because she is a triangle head. The photo is decorated with a small blue word bubble that says "bow wow". Her name is Vivi and she is a mischief (but still good).]

Where can your fanworks be found? Well first and foremost, you should check out my Earth-65 askblog over at @ask-nelsonandmurderdock because that's where the fun stuff is. (And give me a follow and throw an ask my way while you're there!)

You can find the rest of my recent stuff at https://amazing-spiderling.tumblr.com/tagged/my%20art (well most of it, there's some stuff I didn't tag during that weirdness this past December and I need to go back and fix that…)

And of course, you can find me over on ao3 at thelonebamf and Discord as thelonebamf#9897

I hope to interact with all you cool kids soon!

Thank you, @amazing-spiderling !

banner by @context-is-for-kingpins !

[ID on a white background, four black triangles that look like spotlights from above. Each illuminates one of the Defenders silhouetted in white: Jessica, Luke, Danny, Matt. A hand on the left is holding a pen writing the words Content Creator Spotlight. There is a little Punisher skull on the pen. End ID]

[zephyr-mew]

fandoms I'm currently love very much

✨Yakuza Infinite Wealth✨ ❤️Ichiban❤️ 🩶Kiryu🩶 🖤Yamai🖤 (!!untagged spoilers will be happening!!)

I have SO MANY FEELINGS-- • kiryuichi when • polycule when • dub defender, hearing people actually speak like local boys is wild (it actually feels like here!! ;w;)

honestly anything yakuza has consumed my soul, so that's uh,, kinda it right now lol

my ever growing list of assorted yakuza faves:

majima • zhao • adachi • tomi • nanba • masato • daigo • nishiki • akiyama

×

faves of yore

📺 RTVS + Friends 📺

love all of them so much 💜

🌌 Arcana 💚Muriel💚❤️Julian❤️💜Asra💜

mash these boys together in every which way and I'll die happy 💜 also lucio/valerius fucks. unfortunately a simp for devil lucio

Jerma

jerma

Hotline Miami

Stanley Parable

ultra deluxe reignited my love for this :3 check out the demo, it's a completely separate thing from the main game + absolutely worth playing

OFMD

izzy meow meow - particularly fond of steddyhands and roach/izzy

Homestar Runner

a formative childhood experience + permanent vocabulary alterer

Jak and Daxter

Jak ✔️ Erol ✔️ Torn ✔️

Hotel Dusk + Last Window

thinkin bout Hyde... and Jeff... and Charles... and Louis... and Tony...

Dan Vs

official episodes are all free on youtube 👀 all my love for this fucked up little dude

Subeta

honestly the best avatar and pet site I've ever seen, hmu @ LyricZephyr for buddy gold account gifts :3 please they're just sitting there uselessly otherwise

×

other things that I have liked at some point under the cut

A Way Out

acab ✌️

Ace Attorney

Apollo best boy ❤️ haven't played anything past 5 tbh, they did my boy dirty and I needed a long break from the fandom

Animal Crossing

Kicks is bae, he's the only one who didn't make a Big Fucking Deal of me trying on femme stuff as a guy back in New Leaf

Be My Princess

Roberto my love my life ❤️

Beginner's Guide

Bugsnax

these bitches gay, your honor

Cause of Death

iOS game that shut down in like 2010 ;_; I miss Mal. and Kai. Fun fact, I shipped Mal with Hyde from Hotel Dusk - mainly bc they're both detectives lol. nevermind the fact that they're in different time periods

Créme de la Créme

from Choice Of games - literally writing up a whole rec post for this, there's so many queer options it's great

Dem Salty Bois + Friends

Pat 💜 Wade 🐔 Gar 🐺 JP 🍍 special guest BreadHeroDan 🍞

Dragon Age Origins + 2 + Inquisition

tbh I haven't personally played much, but I watched a lot of my sibling's playthroughs. I've got a soft spot for a lot of these guys. god I wish I didn't have to draw/commission stuff myself to see more of my inquisitor/warden/hawke

Dream Daddy

Damien especially 💜

Fire Emblem Awakening + Fates

admittedly weak for takumi. and a lot of the boys tbh. maaaybe someday I'll play 3H

Gabriel Knight 3

why this. damn my weakness for shitty 90s games and a sassy bitch boy with chaotic bi vibes

Journey

The Longing

the scronkly bab ;w;

Markiplier

look

Metal Gear Solid 1-3

I haven't played myself, but I grew up watching my sibling play these a lot. Ocelot's stupid hand guns gesture and Raiden slipping on bird shit are forever burned into my brain.

Motorcity

lost before its time

My Little Pony

Braeburn 💛

Osomatsu-san

def a Karamatsu boy 💙

Oxboxtra

Persona 3/4/5/Q

tbh I've only fully finished 3s male mc route and q, the rest I've roughly half finished? I'm aware of 4s major spoiler, somehow never seen 5s I think - but honestly, I don't care about spoilers for this fandom. yusuke best boy

Portal

Professor Layton 1-6

Punch-Out Wii + Super

I don't know why I love these characters as much as I do, but hey

Sam & Max

alas I am not immune to Jergen the goth german vampire and his fucking doorknocker-ass nipple piercings

Sims 2 DS

I like Sims in general, but this particular weirdass game had a stranglehold on me for a hot minute

Smosh

Sorted Food

Stumpt

Tales Runner

Rough... Kai... Ocean... Maki... I forget what they changed their names to in the newest server, they're dumb and I'm not using them

TF2

trucks 👏 n 👏 vans // hmu for my decade-old playlist of sfms and music~

Wild Kratts

stg Chris looks like Apollo Justice, Martin looks like Chris Dan Vs, Zach looks like Dan Dan Vs... what is up with this

Witcher

I'm gay

Wolf Among Us

I just,, really like Bigby okay

~

for any youtube types, hmu for my most likely absurdly long playlists of them ✌️

[yoongiblunt]

I got to see pierce the veil AND the used on Wednesday!!!

I waited 15 years to see the used after finding them on my dads work music hard drive from the club (that’s how I found mcr and most other shit I ended up being about when I was like, 8) and the fact that I was in the same room as Bert? Feral. Insane. Bonkers. There really aren’t words. The whole time I was thinking back to those YouTube fanfics of him and Gerard— which is hilarious bc I’m nearly 24 now. I held up a little thing on my phone that said “bert made me gay” and the man took one at it and gave me the stupidest smile and tapped his temple before pointing in my direction and laughing. He all but called me a fag then and there lmaooooo. A lot of the crowd wasn’t there for the used, which is real. Most of them were 16ish. But I was close enough to the stage that me absolutely foaming at the mouth and screaming every single word to their songs was definitely noticeable. Bert stayed very close to our end of the stage for most of the show.

And pierce the veil was surreal. I waited 12 years to see them. I remember sh’ing and crying and listening to them when my parents fought, which is wildly depressing, but that was my sense of control then. I remember staying up waiting for king for a day and a love like war to premiere. I remember drawing fanart of myself and Vic meeting at concerts like warped. I was prevalent enough in the quotev ffc that someone actually wrote a fic about Jaime and I having crushes on each other while both our bands played warped tour and there was this cute little scene where Vic and I were chatting while sitting in lawn chairs outside of our busses while drinking coronas??? He told me that Jaime had a crush on me and then in that same setting later in the fic Jaime and I had a smooch. It’s wild that it’s been so many years and these artists still have this impact on me??? I was literally sobbing during hold on til may and all of my friends were trying so hard to get him to pull me up on stage. He didn’t, but this girl Jessica did get pulled up and she was shaking and crying and he was holding her shoulder very carefully while their foreheads were pressed together and he sang to her. Then he gave her his guitar. It was almost made up feeling the way that they were all in front of me. I swooned over Tony hard.

I did take huge issue with the people that were in the crowd though. Without asking, boyfriends were moving their girlfriends in front of me or big groups of people were trying to elbow threw, as if I didn’t want to be there just as badly as I did. I got to the venue at Fuckin 1:15 and the show wasn’t until 5:30. The Fillmore was dogshit at setting up a line though and hadn’t even put out the gates or anything. So we had been waiting out on the steps just for them to fuck the line up so badly that people who got there at 5 were running and surging to the front.

I remember I had a little thing on my phone that was like “Tony toss me a pick” and my friend even caught him throwing them my direction on camera after I yelled his name just for this tiktoker to grab all of them and shove them in her pocket. It was obvious who they were meant for.

I tried rlly hard to not be annoyed by those things though, because it was such an important show for me.

I’m finally making baby key happy. I’m making my inner child happy. I’m experiencing things I never got to as a kid. I didn’t go to concerts or express myself. Now I’m becoming the person I want to be and doing the things I want to do.

Danielle was walking in and out of the venue and I wanted so badly to say hey to her and ask her about the baby but I didn’t want the crowd to notice her and swarm so I just stayed still. Anthony Tran came and took pictures of the people next to me and it was obvious they didn’t realize who he was either. So I stayed quiet. But inside I was losing my Fuckin mind.

We also accidentally parked right next to ptv’s bus??? It wasn’t like, intentional. We managed to find really good venue side parking and we kind of debated on whose bus that would even be because there were 4 of them but we didn’t linger. After the show I noticed a little crowd and I wanted to hang around but I was also trying to figure out where my friend was, so not 10 feet away from me the crowd of like 6 people walks away and I figure security told em to fuck off. Turns out Vic popped out and hung out with them for a sec. Right beside me. And I didn’t notice. But my hair is the absurdly bright red so I’m sure he saw me. I cannot bELIEVE

Anyway, it took everything in me to not buy tickets to see them in Atlanta on Tuesday just bc I am still not over this show. I am thinking about trying to see them in Texas though if money permits

[emackenzie-03]

Project 1 Process Blog

My process for this first project had many twists and turns. When I sat down to figure out my snippets, I initially only had one solid idea. My first snippet was based off of a painting that my best friend made for me when we both left for college. One part of it contains the quote "Call Me When You Get to Pluto". This stuck out to me, and I decided to incorporate it into my first snippet. The main feeling that I was trying to engulf with my snippet is the feeling of security within good friendships, and the knowledge that no matter how far away we are from each other, my best friend and I will always be like an anchor for one another. I started out drawing this very literally, but after I recieved some help to point me in a different direction, I finally sketched a front door/porch with a porch light on. This represents that feeling of security and comfortability, because even though we are far apart, we always look out for one another. My next snippet took a little bit longer to land on. I wanted to incorporate the phrase "Fix it Again Tony" into a work. This snippet has another personal connection to me, as a couple years back I purchased a project Fiat Spider with my Dad. True to the acronym, the car has been nothing but a constant struggle. It is jagged around the edges, but I could not be more proud of it. I wanted to try to represent that feeling of pride into a drawing. At first I took a very literal approach to it, and drew a wrench with the Fiat logo on it. After reflecting and recieving some help, I decided to draw a rough depiction of a run-down looking Fiat with a bow and balloon on it. I attempted to show that pride that I feel for my car through the balloon and bow, which are commonly put on a first car for teens.

[yndigot]

god i miss rp

I really do need and want to rp right now, but IDEK what I'd put in an ad to try to find someone. I've scanned ads and I don't see anyone looking for something that really draws me in. So I need to create my own ad, but I also don't know what I want.

I'm not sure there's a fandom I want to play in. I've done Lost, Harry Potter, LotR, MCU, Downton Abbey, something RPF adjacent (lifting actors who were in a project together and had good chemistry, making one a rockstar and one a photographer and creating what were essentially OCs with their names and physical appearances), a BBC Sherlock inspired take on Sherlock Holmes which pulled more from the books than the series by the time it got going (BC and MF were the faces we used, it borrowed some from series 1, and then ... ignored everything else about the show). I'm not sure I'd circle back to any of that right now except for literally just ... restarting the same line again where it left off with either the Holmes partner or the Downton partner. If they were interested, I would jump. (Holmes partner and I had a newer line that was MUCH more AU from either the book or TV series that I would love to see continue and may eventually jumpstart again.) Some of these lines were canon up to a certain point and then jumped off from there, some were wildly AU from start to finish and just borrowed characters or worldbuilding.

I've also done lines that were built entirely of OCs with plots like "the cute guy who lives in my dorm is secretly a prince!" and "I'm in love with my fuckbuddy but can't admit it, but I'm going to try to destroy his current relationship by encouraging him to cheat with me" and "I don't actually want to get divorced, but I cheated and now the woman I cheated with his pregnant" and "she's a nurse and he's an orderly who's a conscientious objector"... etc.

I MIGHT do Downton if it were AU, but also .... sometimes I wonder what the point of AU Downton is because the setting is so integral to who the characters are and how their lives are twisted to fit these roles.

I could see myself going back to a Potter line if people weren't incorporating the past 10+ years of "canon" into their takes on the characters (I literally dngaf about anything that wasn't in the original 7 books and will not consider it in my interpretation of the characters) and if JKR wasn't JKRing all over the place making all enjoyment of the fandom feel toxic.

MCU similarly feels like I just don't have the energy to know what's gone on in canon post-Endgame, and all I'd want to play is Avengers hanging out as a family and either Steve and Tony falling in love or Steve and Bucky finding their way back to each other c. CATWS and the first Avengers movie.

I would also probably do Tolkein again, but my knowledge feels a little stale and I'm not sure how many other people would be interested in ... probably a post-war Shire based romance story, which is what I think I'd be most interested in writing. Literally fuck the rest of Middle Earth, I want Merry and Pippin thrust into the middle of like ... a Jane Austen novel.

I like Star Trek, particularly AOS, but my knowledge of the larger canon is "background noise from my childhood" and "haven't had time to watch the newer series" so ... I'm not comfortable wading into it right now.

I really enjoy Schitt's Creek, Our Flag Means Death, Young Royals, Red White and Royal Blue, and Love Victor. I have written/would write some fic for (some) of them (and I've dipped into occasionally reading fic for the others). I don't really identify with a particular character enough to want to fully embody them, though, or I'd like to write a take where I can control all characters, and I don't think I'd enjoy surrendering half the story to someone else, which has been the absolute joy of role play in most lines.

Someone tell me what I should look for in a role play line/partner right now. I have such solid ideas of what I don't want at the moment, but figuring out what I do want seems unreasonably hard.

I guess an OC line would be the easiest thing? Just come up with a scenario and start from scratch with original characters, but sometimes that's way harder to make successful with a partner you don't know because you don't have the shared shorthand of canon. I've done OC lines with a longterm partner in the past, and it was very enjoyable, but that's because we already had such a rapport and knew what the other liked, and that made it SO much easier to shape the line into something fun and interesting.

[trivechallenge202292]

Own Your Future Difficulty

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