Tumgik
#tony stark quotes
marvel-lous-guy · 2 years
Text
Muffled voice on the phone: We have kidnapped your son and if you want to see him alive again you'll have to-
Tony: Son? I HAVE A SON!?! WHY AM I JUST HEARING ABOUT THIS!?!
Muffled voice: ...We have the teenager with brown hair and a science pun shirt
Tony: Oh, you mean Peter. Yeah, he's not my son.
Muffled voice: ...are you sure?
Tony: yeah, I'm pretty sure
Muffled voice: Well, we still have the kid locked up... so do you want him or not?
Tony: ... Peter is literally sat right in front of me doing his calculus homework...
Tony: Pete, were you kidnapped?
Peter: Oh yeah! That's what I forgot to tell you!
4K notes · View notes
Text
Spider-Man: Welcome to “has my food gone bad or does it just have a slight off texture that’s kicking me into a small sensory overload”?
46 notes · View notes
somebucky · 3 months
Text
1 note · View note
ananightingalecosplay · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
"Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist."
- Tony Stark, The Avengers
Cosplay by me
Photo by Yana Gallis
Make Up Ekaterina D
5 notes · View notes
romanoffshouse · 5 months
Text
[Natasha speaking Russian]
Y/N, sighing: Yeah, I know.
Tony: You speak Russian?
Y/N: No. I just know the phrase, "This is all your fault"
Y/N: She says it a lot.
4K notes · View notes
incorrectquotesmcu · 2 months
Text
Tony: I'm a Stark, flirting is part of my heritage.
Clint: What does that mean?
Natasha: His father was a slut too.
2K notes · View notes
Text
Natasha: *before a mission* Who’s turn is it to give a pep talk?
Steve: *sighs* Y/N’s…
Y/N: *stands dramatically on the table* All right, people, let’s fuck shit up out there and not die!
Tony: *wipes away a fake tear* So inspirational
7K notes · View notes
incorrectwandanat · 3 months
Text
[angry natasha storming down the hallway]
tony: uh oh.
reader: what?
tony: i see an angry wife heading our way.
reader: yours or mine?
tony: does it matter?
reader: if it's yours, there's a chance we'll live, but if it's mine, we're dead.
2K notes · View notes
incorrectmarvelquote · 3 months
Text
Peter: Sometimes Tony asks me “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
Peter: I’ve learned that that actually means ‘stop’
Peter: He is never very interested in my thought process
1K notes · View notes
rxmqnova · 1 month
Text
Tony: So, are you two dating now?
Y/N & Natasha: Yes.
Tony: Why?
Y/N: I happen to find Natasha very appealing.
Tony: Yeah, I can understand that. I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with Natasha.
898 notes · View notes
Tony: What's the greatest movie ever made?
Peter: Probably Scorsese's Goncharov
Tony: You know Scorsese? Pretty impressed kid not gonna lie
Peter: Thanks mister Stark :), have you seen it? You really should watch it, I think you'll especially like Goncharov's character development
Tony: I haven't, I'll check it out
*Later*
Tony, on his laptop: THAT LITTLE SHIT-
2K notes · View notes
marvel-lous-guy · 2 years
Text
Tony: Don't tell the others but Peter's my favourite avenger
Rhodey: yeah... we already know Tones
Tony: what!? How!?
Rhodey: You know his order by heart for every restaurant we've ever gotten friday to order at, you always give him the last piece of everything, you always let him pick the movie and he lives in your penthouse.
Tony: ...so?
Rhodey: Literally just yesterday, you threatened to kill Sam because he called Peter Underoos
Tony: WELL THAT'S WHAT I CALL HIM!
1K notes · View notes
Text
Peter: Do I enjoy doing [thing] or does finishing a task just give me a sense of fulfilment and I just keep doing it because I’m good at it?
Tony: Kid, this ain’t the time for a full blown midlife crisis.
115 notes · View notes
oscorp-lawsuit · 11 months
Text
Headcanon that when Peter accidentally calls Tony dad for the first time, he immediately freaks out over his slip-up (as usual) but Tony is running on like -20 hours of sleep and doesn’t even notice the mistake but he responds to it so suddenly Peter spirals into ANOTHER crisis because does that mean Tony thinks of Peter as his son, or did he just not hear him right? And now he doesn’t know how to bring it up without outing the fact that he wants Mr. Stark to be his dad
Peter: “Hey, dad?”
Peter, internally: Wait, shit shit! Why did I say that? I can’t call Mr. Stark DAD. That’s so creepy-
Tony, dead on his feet and hearing colors: “Yeah, Pete?”
Peter:
Peter, tearing up: “Um-”
4K notes · View notes
ananightingalecosplay · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media
“There's no throne, there is no version of this where you come out on top. Maybe your army comes and maybe it's too much for us but it's all on you. Because if we can't protect the Earth, you can be damned well sure we'll avenge it.”
― Tony Stark, “The Avengers”
Cosplay by me
Photo by Yana Gallis
Make Up Ekaterina D
3 notes · View notes
romanoffshouse · 2 months
Text
Tony: Y/N, your phone is ringing.
Y/N: Who is it?
Tony: It says "mommy is calling".
Y/N: Oh, it's Natasha.
1K notes · View notes