[ jason dohring, thirty-six, cis male, he/him ] ━ did y'all see [ waylon pritchett ] walkin’ into [ splittin’ hairs? ]. they’ve lived in frostford for [ thirty-six years, ] and you can catch ‘em around town working as a [ garbage man.] I reckon they’re pretty [ straightforward & loyal ] but I hear they can also be kinda [ dogmatic & nosy ]. if ya see ‘em around, be sure to say hi.. ━ [ ooc: autumn, 25+, est, she/her]
greetings, i’m autumn. i like cheese and dogs. let’s go.
teen pregnancy tw btw, just in case
my main man waylon, way way, the wayster. to know his story and not just his name, i must take you back to the golden years of high school.
waylon was, shocker, a football player. he was a running back not a qb because i’m NOT a total cliche.
so imagine sixteen year old waylon, walking around school, letterman’s jacket. body checking nerds into lockers just because he can, knocking books out of people’s hands just because he can and walking along like nothing.
that’s just jock aesthetic.
he was that guy.
he was born and raised in FROSTFORD. does the name pritchett seem familiar? that’s because his mother, the queen, the only woman he loves, the only woman he TRUSTS, owns splittin’ hairs.
splittin’ hairs is his fave place in town because when he goes there all the gossiping old ladies are like, oh waylon you’re so handsome, oh my how you’ve grown, if only i was twenty years younger. you get it. lorraine’s his woman, gimme dat aquanet
loves a good ego stroke.
anyway back to high school.
the football team was all about beers and bonfires, duh. and waylon here was king of saying “ain’t nothing to do in this town but get drunk and have sex haha!”
it was 1999 so like, you think frostford is tiny now? imagine it back then. they didn’t even have the whole enchilada around yet
so friday nights were wild, the falcons would bring home the W, then have a big party and try not to get arrested when the sheriff inevitably rolled up like why yall like this
sexual relations occurred
and occurred
and occurred
do you think waylon was being safe about it? he wasn’t. boom, we all love a cheeky #teenpregnancy
she was a frostford local herself. their parents went back and forth about what to do, while trying to keep things hush hush?
that didn’t work. you think wanda pritchett could resist talking about the little minx that seduced her sweet innocent waylon? no way
it was a big town rumor~ because, in classic let’s hide the pregnancy moves, the girl moved away to spend some time with her aunt.
nine months specifically
bada bing bada boom, waylon is not a father, the girl came back, everyone pretended it didnt happen because thats the healthy reaction
the baby actually went to live with baby mama’s older sister who was like 25 living in sc
waylon has like a baby pic and a second grade pic of the child and thats all
throughout high school it was like a godsend that he didnt have to take responsibility for a CHILD
during high school and college it was a dream, then as he got older he had regrets~ and was contemplating what could’ve been~
melodramatic
now he’s broody af because he’s old and can’t party anymore and peaked in high school and blah blah blah
he was a mailman at one point but people expected him to be happy and chatty and that got annoying
now he picks up your garbage but makes more money than you
he only gets joy out of playing the alumni game at the high school for homecoming
and dressing up like frankenstein, with painted face and all, for the haunted hayride to scare children
thinks luke bryan and thomas rhett are sell outs what is that pop country SHIT, but his go to karaoke song is honky tonk badonkadonk so..
he doesnt do karaoke though, only when he’s blackout drunk and he forgets it happened
but it’s always honky tonk badonkadonk and nothing else
tell me how he is mostly quiet and keeps to himself but is nosy af and loves to gossip with his MOTHER
he’s always like “you learn a lot from people’s trash”
like yeah playboy waylon KNOWS you gotta use that real top shelf viagra to do what you gotta do
he also knows every middle aged gal who thinks shes fooling people coloring out the gray
only wears black, dark gray, and navy
loves a good plum
somehow wins all the cow milking competitions, he just knows how to get ol’ bessie to fill that can up
went to a miranda lambert concert and cried when she touched his hand, we don’t talk about that though
doesn’t have a vehicle because he just walks places, he’ll break out his old mountain bike if he’s feeling wild
used to eat spiders on dares
pretends he hates when people talk about plays he made in high school/college, secretly loves it
older folks call him waylon, obviously that’s his name, people around his age know him as “pritch” anyone significantly younger he doesnt want to associate with you, so you may call him mr pritchett and nothing else
scared of turkeys
i’m done now this is too long
bye
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Esposito Legacy
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Did you two know?
Maria is the first to speak after the abrupt departure of her husband and daughter.
Maria: Did either of you know?
Junior: I didn’t...
Maria: ...Tina?
Valentina: … I found out a while ago after she took a test. Please, mom, don’t be mad at her, she is so upset with this and with Ace.
Junior: Ace? She’s still seeing that asshole?
Maria: Language. Ace? Who is that?
Valentina: Ace Morrow? He was Thalia boyfriend, they broke up recently
Junior: God, what a fucking asshole, he can’t even take responsibly for something he helped do?
They were silent for a bit longer until Maria spoke up again.
Maria: I’m going to go talk to her.
Teen Pregnancy Hotline: 1-800-672-2296
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Esposito Legacy
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Um
Both Valentina and Thalia look up at their parents' question on the silence. Valentina looks at Thalia as she is taking a deep breath.
Thalia: I have something that I need to tell you two… But please don’t get mad…
Their parent's happy demeanor changed in an instance.
Maria: What is it, honey?
Thalia is quiet for a beat.
Thalia: I’m pregnant.
Nobody says anything for a tense second, it is Antonio that speaks first.
Antonio: Excuse me? You are what? Because I knew I am getting older, but I do not think my hearing is that bad.
Thalia: I’m pregnant dad, I’m sorry…
Antonio opens his mouth to speak but instead leaves the table in a hurry slamming doors on his way out of the dining room. Thalia runs up to her room shortly after when there were no other words from anyone else at the table.
Teen Pregnancy Hotline: 1-800-672-2296
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