#twst interactions

[myeagleexpert]

If Yuu had adhd

Vil: You must look at the person when talking to them, it is rude not to look them in the eye.

Yuu: Of course Vil, so can you continue what you were saying? Vil: Getting back on topic, I was saying that…. Yuu, looking straight into his eyes: Hunhun, I'm listening. Vil: Then my manager said that… Yuu, quickly looking at Vil's lip gloss: *what is the exact color of his lips? Is the brand new?* Did he have the courage to do that? Vil: How audacious! And do you know what my father said about that? Yuu, looking at Vil's hair: *I've seen this shade of blonde somewhere, where was it again? * Tell me more Vil... Vil: Absolutely ridiculous, for a reputable company they should… Yuu,looking at the curtain behind Vil's head:*The print on Pomefiore's curtain is beautiful, I've seen in a movie the princess who made a dress with the help of animals? Could I do something like that?* Are you going to sue them Vil? Is this the first time you've done this?

Vil: It's the first and last time! But I don't want to think about it now, it will only give me unnecessary wrinkles. Would you like to join me for tea, prefect? Yuu, thinking hard about what the film was so she could sew the dress model: *the film is… the film is… THE MOVIE IS…!* Enchanted!

Vil: it's "Delighted", prefect. You got distracted again, didn't you? Yuu, staring at Vil's hair and remembering: Marlyn Moroe.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

“An emergency contact…” Yuu scratches their head. “Well, there’s one adult who stands out. Someone who has welcomed me with open arms, listened to my needs, and someone I really look up to and trust. Headmage Crowley! Do you have Trein’s cell number?”

Not gonna lie, you had me bawling in the first half 😂

Enter; An Unkindness of Ravens.

Up until now, Crowley had been nodding enthusiastically to your every comment. Feathers fluffed, eyes shut, as he bathed in the unearned praise. You could almost see his ego inflating right before you.

One adult who stands out.

A smile formed.

Someone who has welcomed me with open arms...

It grew, elevating the apples of his cheeks.

... listened to my needs...

He was glowing with pride, the most excited you had ever witnessed him.

... and someone I really look up to and respect.

His face might actually rip in half.

The you had dropped the bomb, and Crowley's entire demeanor collapsed in on itself. His shattered smile landed atop of the heap.

“Wh-What?! Professor Trein…!!” he managed to stutter out. “Did I hear you correctly?!”

"Yeah," you replied calmly. "Professor Trein."

"Wh-What exactly makes him a standout?!" Crowley demanded. When you gave him a queer look, he quickly deflected. "N-Not that I am envious, of course! I am asking as his employer so that I may take student feedback into consideration when calculating end-of-the-year performance-based bonuses."

"He's done so much to look after me and all of his students,” you patiently explained. “Professor Trein chaperoned us to the City of Flowers and taught us about its history. He ensured our safety when there was trouble afoot and even shed a tear for our moral character. I also heard from Ace and Deuce that Professor Trein oversaw NRC when Charon invaded campus.

“He always makes time to speak one-on-one with his students even on matters outside of schoolwork. Professor Trein cares about us like we're his real children and grandchildren. I'd totally trust him as my emergency contact.

“Compared to that… I seem to vaguely remember a certain someone who shirks his responsibilities at every opportunity, wastes his time on walks and snacks instead of running the school, offloads his duties onto children, and ignores my SOS calls when I was being held hostage over winter break.”

“I wonder who it could be that you’re speaking off.”

“Gee, I wonder,” you said sarcastically, staring right at Crowley. “Sucks that we’ll never know. Anyway, do you have Professor Trein's number or not?"

"W-Well!!" Crowley bristled, disarmed by your demand. "It wouldn't be very professional of me to hand out my employees' contact information as though it were Halloween candy! It's strictly confidential, I'm afraid I cannot divulge it."

He folded his arms smugly, waiting for you to change your mind, to beg for his cell phone number instead.

"Aaah, I get it." You shrugged, cool as a cucumber. "That's okay, I can ask Professor Trein directly myself. It was worth a shot to ask you anyway, headmaster. See ya!"

With that, you turned and exited his office. No fanfare, no groveling. Just... nothing.

Crowley completely deflated, cradling his head in his hands. He teased out a whiny groan.

"For them to overlook their most generous headmaster in favor of Professor Trein... Ooooh, where did I go wrong with that child...?"

[theleechyskrunkly]

The Discussion.

Paige is angry, and Idia's a goner.

Finn Clearcove belongs to @thehollowwriter

Regular text for present time, italics for flashback.

Everybody seemed to be doing the right thing right now, and what was the right thing to do? Stay out of Paige's way. His dorm mates looked utterly baffled (and terrified) as he stormed past them, anger oozing off of him. The students who saw him prayed to the seven for whoever had angered Paige to such a degree, and wondered who'd been the fool to do so.

Paige was livid, his face contorted into a frown that no one had ever seen on his usually passive features. It had everyone wondering what could’ve possibly happened for him to be in such a sour mood.

Well, to begin with, the main culprit was Idia. Why was he angry at Idia? Well, you're bound to find out. Boy, was he about to give Idia an earful...

”So, I take it you're... friends with Idia?” Finn’s voice cut through the music playing in Paige’s earbuds. The two were in Finn’s private area of the school’s botanical garden, Finn painting what seemed to be a carnivorous plant eating a rabbit(with extremely gory detail, as was characteristic for Finn's paintings), while Paige laid on his back with his head resting on a tree branch, scrolling through Twstube. His hair, which was out of its usual braid for once and running loose everywhere, served as his only pillow.

Finn's question was rather random, not only because they had not even been talking about Idia, but also because the two rarely spoke much when they were together at the botanical garden. They just sat in silence, each doing their own thing while enjoying the others company. It was like a little routine they'd set together.

“Yeah? Why?” Paige responded, taking out one of his earbuds and rolling onto his stomach to look up at Finn. Paige preferred to pretend he wasn’t aware of the obvious mutual dislike between Finn and Idia, but he knew avoiding it was no use.

"No, nothing. He's just rather... peculiar, to say the least." There was an obvious distaste in Finn's voice as he attempted to find a not-so-obvious way to hide his dislike for Idia, yet he failed rather miserably at doing so. Paige catches on very quickly to the emotions of humans, mer plus beast people, and animals alike. It's a trait that comes with the horse instincts.

"Peculiar would be an understatement," Paige of all people knew Idia was extremely bizarre, but with the amount of traveling he's done? Boy, has he seen worse. "What exactly is it that you have against him? You two are not really doing a fantastic job of being friendly with one another." Paige was blunt. Everything he said was always upfront, he never held back. The guy had no filter whatsoever and it showed.

Finn narrowed his eyes and his eyebrow twitched slightly, as if the simple thought of Idia got under his fins. "He's obnoxious, rude, talks nonstop — ugh, his gamerlingo is unbearable —, he's selfish, and outright disrespectful! If I had to list the times he's made comments regarding my weight, the list would go on for an eternity." Finn looked like he wanted to say more, but held his tongue to prevent his words from getting out of hand.

However, he had already said the words that set Paige ablaze. He instantly sat up, his usually blank expression knotting into something that showcased incredulity. He knew full well Idia was a certified yapper, and he could seem highly obnoxious to most, but since when did he bodyshame others? "What do you mean by making comments on your body? What type of comments? Is he making fun of you?" By this point, Paige had taken off both his earbuds, which alerted Finn in some sort of way. Paige hardly removed both his earbuds, if even one, not even when he showered (he has waterproof earbuds), and when he did, things were serious.

Finn hesitated before confirming Paige's suspicions, after all, Paige looked like he would go off stomping the second he said the truth. "Yes, he did. Such unoriginal insults, you'd think he was proud of hims- Paige, where are you going?!"

Paige didn't need to hear another word. He did indeed stomp off (quite literally). And he was stomping off to Ignihyde.

Paige did not even knock before letting himself into Idia's room, already knowing the password by heart since Idia had given up on changing it (Paige figured out every time). Idia was in the middle of game, nearly flying off the bed when Paige came in and turned on the lights in his room.

"You and I have something to discuss."

ITS DONE RAAAAAAHHHHHH

Guys I swear I didn't procrastinate this for a whole month trust 🙏

Btw this is the first fic I've ever ever written so my apologies for it being trash 😍🫶

Tagging: @thehollowwriter @cyanide-latte @xen-blank (let me know if you wish to be added to the taglist)

[twistedwonderlandshenanigans]

"Interview" With NRC Students

Last set of my December Drabbles posts. Written after Chapter Four / Scarabia Chapter, burnt out and taking no shit Yuu. Word Count: ~5k ----------------------------------------------- You read over the set of questions Crowley had provided to ask for end of year interviews. Technically, it was supposed to be Dire's job to check in on all the students, but yet again the task was passed onto you. As you looked over the questions, you felt your eyes glaze over but a certain burning in your chest. None of these had anything to do with checking in with mental health, which was clearly what the students needed. You're no therapist. You're no faculty member, you're not someone who should be doing this anyways. You flip the paper over and think over a question you could ask. Just one. You have so many people to get through, and your emotional capacity and mental tenacity are nearing their limits. As the first person walks in an the two of you get to chatting, you finally settle on a question, maybe seeking some wisdom for yourself, and a glimpse into the way your friends, enemies and acquaintances think "What advice would you give someone who's looking to improve their day to day life? Or just advice in general?"

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Riddle is slightly taken aback by the question, before smiling assuredly. "I've been learning quite a bit myself what improvement can mean from one person to another. As you know, the standard for improvement and growth has always been set very high for me, but I think...I think that perhaps the best advice I can give is to learn to set a high standard for yourself rather than....someone else's approval.....it's not advice I've learned to follow, but I received it from a close friend this year and I believe it's sound. At least if you are disciplined enough to do so for yourself." -----------------------------------------------------------------------

Trey laughs a little bit in response, grabbing at his glasses frame and tipping them up slightly, before crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair, sighing a bit. "Advice, huh? Well, I can't say anything for sure, but I guess...don't sweat the small things. It's old advice, but there's a reason it's been said." "Did you want to elaborate on that?" "What else would there to be elaborate on? I thought that was pretty straightforward." "Maybe it has a little more of a personal meaning to you?" "I mean, I've got a bunch of younger siblings, and as vice housewarden I end up looking after a lot of people in the dorm, including Riddle. If I had to worry about every single thing everyone shorter than me was up to or doing, I'd have grey hair by now." He had a shit eating grin on his face as you stopped writing and looked up at him unamused. "You're not funny." "I like to think I am." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cater's face almost falls a bit when he hears your question, but he keeps himself smiling. "Could...could you repeat that please? Cay-cay's um....I need to make sure I heard that right." "What advice would you give someone who wants to improve their day to day life?" He looked almost haunted, though he was trying to maintain his happy disposition. "Did...do you want a different question?" "Ahah um well no! No, it's ok, I got it I just...need a minute I guess! It's...I guess nobody's asked me for advice...ever. I've given it just never asked...specifically, y'know? Ahhh, never mind, can you forget all that and we can take it from the top?" You can't hide your concern and confusion all that well, but you nod a bit and smile reassuringly. "What advice would you give someone who wants to improve their day to day life?" Cater lights up as if the emotions he was conveying a moment ago had never existed. "That's easy! Cay-cay's got you covered! Find something to smile about everyday, because if you don't-...just find something to smile about everyday. Even if it's just one thing that'll keep you going, you're still going, and that's what matters." His smile falters just slightly. "That's all you needed from me, right? I can go now?" You give him a small smile and nod, and watch as he leaves the room, an awkward tension still sitting in the air. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Deuce looks like a deer in the headlights at the question. "Why would you ask me that?" You gave him a knowing smile, cocking your brow a bit and he cleared his throat awkwardly. "I think you have plenty to contribute to this, Deuce. We both know you've undergone a lot of personal growth to get to where you are now." "Well yeah but it hasn't been easy! And you were there when I've had.... when I've flown off the handle and just gone right back to who I was before." "But you're not the same as you were before. You feel regret, which was what made you want to change in the first place, because before you heard your mother on the phone, you didn't. I wasn't there when you were a delinquent, but I've known you for a few months now and can say with confidence you're doing a good job Deuce, you're making a lot of progress towards your own goal. If you could just share a little bit of insight on what's made it easier, or what's been a motivator other than seeking your mother's approval, I'd really appreciate it." He thinks it over for a moment, nodding slightly as the words slowly come to him. "I...I don't really know, but I guess....I've never stopped trying my best...and I give myself room to be angry when I need it. I think a lot of people either try their best most of the time, or don't put very much effort forward at all, so I think the second thing might be the advice I would give someone. To give yourself room to feel your emotions, big or small, just make sure you have a safe place to do it where you won't hurt other people too." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------Ace looks stupidly unamused and kicks his feet up on your coffee table, blatantly ignoring the look you gave him for doing so. "You're bein' so formal. We're friends why are you acting like that?" You couldn't help but huff a bit, amused but not wanting him to know that. "I have to do this for Crowley, it's not like I want to. Just answer the question Ace, then get out, I have so many other people I have to get to today." You regret the second part of your sentence when you see his shit eating smile from across the way. He settles even deeper into the seat and sighs deeply, happily and puts his hands behind his head. "So I get your full, undivided attention until you get the answer you're looking for? Cool." "Mmm, mhm, you get my full undivided attention until you waste my time and I throw something at you and the countdown is starting my patience is paper thin right now Ace, do not test me." He scoffs and sits up properly, groaning out of boredom. "Fiiiine, but is it really wasting time if you're hanging out with me? You owe me an hour after thi-" "Sure, yeah, whatever, shut up and get out, or answer the goddamned question and get out." "Sheesh, ok, fine, the best advice I can give is for you to loosen up, Great Sevens you're tense." "NO SHIT SHERLOCK." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leona didn't even come to you for HIS interview, you had to go track down the lazy lion yourself. He mumbled something when you knocked at the door, but you didn't hear nor care if it was to come in or to go the fuck away. You let yourself in, sat at the end of his bed and waited for some sort of response. "I will throw this clipboard at your head I know you're awake." Clearly, he thought you were bluffing, as a few seconds later a very angry cat was growling at you, and your clipboard had bounced off his head and sat on the floor. You remained unphased, tapping your pen against his nose once, lightly. "You don't scare me, now what advice would you give someone who wants to improve their day to day life?" "The fuck kind of question is that to wake me up from my nap from?" "The kind that if you don't answer I'm calling your sister in law and asking her to make you because I don't have time for this shit either Leona. Answer the question. And before you say anything about me not having your family's contact info, I do have both your phone and password so tread lightly." It hadn't been hard to get, Ruggie was an open book for the right amount of Thaumarks, and Leona's phone had been on the floor, but Leona looked mildly impressed for a split second before remembering he was annoyed, huffing and laying back. "You're lucky I don't eat you alive for throwing that piece of shit at me, herbivore.” “Are you going to answer the question?” “Yeah, I just woke up, give me a damn minute.” “Mira, set one minute timer.” Setting one minute timer. “Oh for Great Seven’s sake, is that how petty you’re being? Fine. If you can’t sleep it off, get something to eat. Now get out of my room, before I decide to eat you.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ruggie didn’t even bother sitting down, he recognized the set up from the year before and laughed a little. “Shyeeheehee if these are the same questions from last year, can’t y’just hand over the paper and pen and I can pretend to write something that Crowley won’t read?” You couldn’t help but snort a bit. While it was tempting, your curiosity for what the hyena boy had for advice outweighed your want to be a little lazy. Besides, at this point it wasn’t for Crowley, it was for you. “Not this time. I’ll be honest. I have a question for everyone, I’m just trying to maintain my sanity though, this isn’t about the headmage anymore, this is me holding on by a thread and looking for some hope for the future.” You laugh weakly, and Ruggie smiles a little, concerned, but it was understandable. You had a lot on your plate, and he was kinda happy that you were that honest with him. He finally sat down across from you and slung his bag from over his shoulder to sit on his lap as he dug through it. “I’m not great with advice, but my gramma always said something about if you wanna go fast, go alone, if you want to go far, go together. So surround yourself with people that are gonna getchya to the end of the school year, ok? Or until Crowley can send’ya home. The other freshies are doin’ a pretty good job from what I can tell but if y’ever need a lil pick-me-up y’can let me know. Might even do it for free.” He grins and winks at you as he finally produces an apple from his bag, rubbing it gently with his sleeve before offering it to you. “I don’t got much, but you’re doin’ a good job prefect. Hopefully y’can pretend that’s like…a bigger prize or somethin’. And I wasn’t kiddin’ when I said I could be a part of that group if y’want me to be.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jack’s ear flicked a bit at your question, his rather stoic expression making you question exactly what was going through his mind. “That’s a pretty broad topic…but my grandparents and parents always say that ‘we will be known forever by the tracks we leave’…so…don’t do anything you wouldn’t want to be remembered for.” “Is that all you want to say?” He simply nods once, happy with his answer. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Azul pushes up his glasses and chuckles a little. “That isn’t something Crowley had you ask, now is it? If advice is what you’re seeking, then perhaps scheduling an app-“ “Azul. I would love to hear you out but frankly I don’t have the time nor the fucks to give about your business deal you’re about to offer, so if you won’t answer the question, I’ll just inform Leona that you refused to co operate and I know how to push his buttons in just the right ways to do so.” An awkward silence filled the air before Azul cleared his throat a bit. “That won’t be necessary. Wisdom that had been imparted on me by my nonna goes as follows: chi non fa, non falla. In other words, he who makes no mistakes, makes nothing. The path to greatness is full of obstacles but can be paved as you learn how to get rid of them. In my case, I recognize that I was fortunate to have seen the road paved by my nonna, and learned from her mistakes so I wouldn’t have to make my own. On the other hand, not having had that example to follow would have allowed me- er…and individual to learn on their own so that they understand and appreciate just how much effort is required. As long as you’re learning, you’re not failing, and sometimes that’s enough.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jade looked rather amused at your question, folding one arm across his chest and holding his chin with the other. “Tried and true advice is the best advice I have to give. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer, you never really know who you can trust.” He smiled a bit at you, but you weren’t quite sure how to feel about it. “I’ll be going back to the lounge now. If you require anything from me, I’m simply a call away.” Did having his number make you a friend or an enemy? Did you really want to know?? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Floyd giggles as he turns the chair around to sit in more comfortably, rocking a bit, before your question finally processes and all his excited movement stops and he slumps in his seat. “Awww but that’s so borin’. It’s not like under the sea where if y’don’t like someone you can just y’know…” he draws his hand in a slitting motion across his neck, tilting his head, and making a wretched squelching noise. “Soooo I guess the only advice I can give ya is if someone’s bein’ stupid to ya, call me! I’ll squeeze ‘em reaaaaal good for ya shrimpy!” He rocks in the chair a bit before he gets up. “I ain’t answerin’ any other questions, so ya better be happy with whatchya got.” It was good enough. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kalim was bubbly as ever, but tilted his head like a confused puppy at your words. “Oh um, I don’t really know. I did hear this one saying though that I thought was really pretty and it was like..um well it went like ‘don’t let the shadows of today take away tomorrow’s sunshine’.” He sat, expression rather blank but happy. He looked rather expectant though, as if he was awaiting praise. You smiled a little bit at him and decided to dive in a little further. “What does that mean to you?” He looked a little surprised, but really thought it over for a moment. “Well, everything can’t be great all the time. Things are usually ok at best for a lot of people, most of the time. But dwelling on the mistakes we make isn’t going to make us feel any better, so why hold onto them when we can let them go and be happy?” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jamil frowned, shaking his head a bit. “You’re asking me this now? What question are you going to ask everyone else?” He looked rather haggard, but you couldn’t decide if after the whole hostage situation, you thought he deserved it, or if you felt bad for him. You ignored your feelings on the matter for now and sighed. “Everyone’s getting the same question.” “Very well then. My advice is don’t fucking overblot.” You looked up to see a somewhat smug expression. “Ask stupid questions, you get stupid answers. I’m going back to my dorm prefect.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Vil was poised and ready as ever. “That’s easy. The only way to ever improve is to practice. Most people say practice makes perfect, but that’s simply not true. If you don’t put your full effort into practicing, if you take short cuts, then you will never reach the level you hope. Perfect practice makes perfect. You must be persistent in achieving greatness; persistence is what sets apart the greats from everyone else. Regardless of what you’re practicing for, whether it’s a role in a movie or to develop patience, the saying remains true.” He smiled a bit and sat up more in his chair. “Was there anything else you wanted to ask me?” You smiled back a bit, finishing writing his response best you could. “Nope, that’s all for now. Thank you Vil.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rook tilted his head a bit and smiled. “Ah, mon trickster, is that all you are looking for? Surely the head mage would not be asking a question of this depth.” He hummed a bit to himself, not really looking for an answer from you- he already knew. “I don’t so much have advice as I do a saying I learned in my time in Pomefiore. There is no rainbow in the soul if there have been no tears in the eyes. Isn’t there such beaute in that? Your soul only grows more beautiful as it does strong when you face hardships, so do not despair when the clouds blur your vision and a downpour slows you in your path. I could simply go on for hou-“ “You really don’t have to Rook, I got the gist….I think. Thank you for your time.” He smiled and tipped his hat politely. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Epel was more prepared than you may have thought, but it was appreciated. "You don't ignore the fuel gauge on a blast cycle when it says its empty. You don't ignore the flashing lights and alerts that let you know when your bike needs something. So apply that to yourself. You need fuel too, so don't wait until you can't go anymore to eat. Don't go until you're so exhausted you break down. Sometimes circumstance makes it difficult, but don't ignore the really big signs that's something's wrong and assume its gonna get better." As if on cue, his stomach rumbled, and he flushed a bit. "That bein' said, my dorm ain't exactly a picnic.  The servin' sizes barely fill me up and peanut butter can work miracles, but not that big. Jack sometimes brings me leftovers from the meals at Savanaclaw, and Deuce sneaks me desserts but it ain't the same as one home cooked meal a' comfort food, y'know?" You nodded apologetically. You refused to get actively involved, but you could offer a fellow freshman a hand. "If you bring ingredients, you can use my kitchen. Just don't get caught. And make me some food too." He looked surprised, then absolutely beamed and laughed softly. "Y'betchya! I'll make sure it's the best damn food y've had in yer life!" ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Idia’s tablet floated in front of you. There was a drawn-out silence, and you wondered if he was even paying attention behind that screen or not. Finally, he responded. “Just advice in general? Lol why would you ask me? You want gaming advice, reqs, strats, sure then yeah, you could shoot me a text or something I guess but this is just p. stupid. I literally don’t leave my room and I’m a nepo baby what relevant and useful advice could I possibly give to a normie?” “Just give me an answer I can write down Idia, it really doesn’t matter.” “Fine then. Avoid middle schoolers at all costs. I can absolutely destroy newbs in game, but IRL? Those guys can pin down your biggest insecurities in two seconds flat and won’t be afraid to call you out on it.” “You took that from a comedy sketch.” “….shut up, I tried, ok? I guess…..read all the tips on the loading screen of a game when you get the chance. Does that work?” You sighed softly, before giving him a tired smile. “Yeah it’s good enough.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ortho let out a sad sounding beep. “What’s wrong Ortho?” The little robot kicked his feet a bit in his seat, processing. “I’m not human. I could give advice, but it might not apply the way I think it does. I could search for it, but it would not be my advice to give. Even if I said something as simple as ‘do your best’, I don’t know, really, what that means. If I give 100% effort in something, I’m pushing the extents of my hardware and software. I run the risk of overheating. I might hurt myself, and in doing that, waste my brother’s time in making him repair me over something that could have been avoided. I have my “best” programmed into me. A human can push past that discomfort, past that risk if they so wish, and in theory, achieve giving more than their best, or something that would be recorded as an anomaly or outlier in a research setting. I have no advice to give.” He lets out a sound like a sigh and sits cross-legged. “Even when I try to give big brother advice, when he follows it, things seem to go wrong. I don’t think I should be who you ask.” You looked over his defeated looking figure. You couldn’t help but feel empathy for him – clearly this had been on his mind for a while. You set aside your clipboard and held your arms open. “You look like you need a hug.” The little robot looked up surprised, then visible relief flooded his features as he nodded a bit and floated into your arms, hugging you tightly, but took care to not let his hair get too close to you. “Doing your best, regardless of who or what we are is all that matters Ortho. My best on a day-to-day basis fluctuates. Sometimes my best means I got out of bed in the morning. Sometimes my best means I finally do those tasks I’ve been meaning to do for weeks. Sometimes my best means I’m on top of everything, getting things done, and feeling great. Everyone’s best looks a little different, sometimes even within the span of hours. You’re doing great. You have people that care about you and will pick you back up if you need a little self help. While some of your capabilities are limited by programming, your actions are not. You still choose to help where you can. You are kind when you want to be. I think that’s when you’re at your best.” Ortho pulled away, nodding a tiny bit. “I think I understand. Thank you, prefect. I appreciate it.” Even though his mouth was hidden, the wrinkles around his eyes told you he was smiling again as he went on his way. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Malleus seemed intrigued, but a little surprised at your question. He shut his eyes gently as he thought it over. “For the fae, years pass by like seconds. To give advice that would only aid you in growth for the next year seems rather near-sighted, though I suppose for you, that is plenty of time to develop your character.” He hummed softly, trying to think of something he could give you, that wouldn’t be overwhelming. You gave him his time, rather happy in the comfortable silence the two of you were able to sit in. “I suppose I’ve always taken the passage of time for granted. Perhaps that is something I will work on as I set my own goals, though with that comes the advice I wish to impart upon you. Your time is precious. However, the only thing more precious is how you spend it. I only wish for you to be happy, healthy, and successful Child of Man. Ensure that the time you spend with others lifts you up, encourages you, and allows you to grow into your potential. I hope that one day, I will see you grow into your full potential.” He smiles softly, hoping that you catch on that he hopes you’ll include him in that circle of friends that will help you continue growing. However, it’s the wording he used that has you wondering if he has had something to do with why you haven’t been able to go home yet. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lilia giggles softly. “Asking for advice from your elders, hm?” He settles in his seat on the ceiling, enjoying the fact that you couldn’t hide a tiny smile from forming from his antics. He pouts thoughtfully and taps his chin. “There’s a lot I could say. Learning to change with time, to live everyday to it’s fullest, to learn to not be afraid to take risks, that there is value in re-evaluating who you’re friends with, that you should follow your heart until your mind screams no, icicles are ideal weapons, you can train crows to sound like humans and then send them after people you hate, develop your vocabulary to the point where if someone makes you mad you make them feel stupid in your response, that you should never swim on an empty stomach, but never go on a roller coaster with a full one, don’t stick metal where it doesn’t belong, never trust where a toddler’s hands have been….I was going somewhere with this.” He paused, spacing out for a moment before shaking his head and coming back to earth to finish what he needed to say.  “Truth be told, I think the most important advice I can give is learn to tell others how you need to be loved. Nobody will ever know what you need, so even if you can’t tell the full extent of what you need, someone close to you will do their best to interpret what you mean to get you what you want. The second step to that then, is to let yourself be loved. You are the only person who sees you in as harsh of a light most people see themselves in. Let other people in to make it better.” He beamed and turned right-side up again. “Will that suffice, prefect?” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Silver looked very concentrated, but needed you to repeat the question. He closed his eyes a bit as he thought, but seemed to startle when he opened them again and sighed. “Be grateful for what you do have, what you can do, instead of being upset at your incapabilities…you have other talents…and other traits than mistakes and shortcomings.” He sighed softly, mumbling something under his breath. You couldn’t make out much, but it sounded like something he had heard many times before, himself. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sebek puffed his chest out, looking disproportionately proud at being asked for advice, though as soon as he opened his mouth you realized you forgot to set a very important boundary and interjected. “It can’t be about Malleus. At all. Or any specific person for that matter.” Sebek’s shoulders fall a bit and he looks a little annoyed. “You did not specify that BEFORE HAND HUMAN!” “Well I did now, so deal with it.” “FINE! I will share with you something that has been shared with me often. It’s-“ “Please your inside voice?” “THAT WAS NOT WHAT I WAS GOING TO SAY.” “I bet you hear it a lot though.” “THAT IS IRRELEVANT. NOW BE QUIET SO I CAN COMPLETE THIS TASK, BENEATH ME AS IT IS, THAT I MAY LEAVE YOU TO YOUR PATHETIC UNDERLING WORK FOR THE HEADMAGE!” You didn’t justify that with an answer, just gestured with your hand for him to get on with it. He cleared his throat a bit and tried to calm down a little. “I was going to say…the more challenging a conflict, the more glorious the triumph. You mustn’t forget to allow yourself to be proud of what you have achieved. While your conflicts and mine may vary in how difficult they are, it does not change the fact that on an individual basis, we must acknowledge the effort we put in to overcome them.” ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Grim sat across from you, his tail swishing curiously side to side, his head tilted and eyes wide before he grinned widely. “Course ya want advice from the Great Grim? Now listen up hench human, ‘m only gonna say it once so ya better make sure y’write it all down, got it?” You nodded a bit, trying to downplay your smile a bit at the toddler-like energy your companion emanated. He stood up on his chair, pacing back and forth a little bit like a drill sergeant. “Never eat expired tuna. If you’re really that hungry, no YA AIN’T. If ya need something from the tallest shelf, climbin’ on the counter is sturdier than any chair in Ramshackle. Sneaking food from the cafeteria works real well if your cheeks are big enough to store it!... And if ya don’t eat it as you’re tryin’ to make a break for it. Ace’s most ticklish area is behind his ear, which is why he always pushes me off when my fur rubs up against him when I’m on his shoulders. If ya ever need me to bug’m, let me know! I think that’s all I got for now.” He stopped and placed his paw on his chin in thought, before one more thing came to mind and he hopped over to you, pushing his face gently against yours. “Oh yeah. ‘Nd don’t forget t’tell the people y’care about they mean somethin’ to ya, in one way or another, 'kay?” ------------------------------------------------------------------------

[captainjacklyn]

Twisted Wonderland Incorrect Quotes #17 :

Crowley, going over Leona's resume : Okay, so right here, it states that you’re creative.

Leona : Yes

Crowley : Okay... may I know what you create?

Leona : Problems.

[gentlegiantberry]

╭── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╮

Epel: What happens when you drink the potion???

Ace: After you drink it... you turn into ligma.

Epel: What's ligma?

...

All for nothing at all...

All for nothing at all...

╰── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╯

Someone save me from myself.

[f-smutt-fitzgerald]

Sam: Welcome to my shop! Everything you could ever want is IN STOCK!

Yuu: Are you… 💖Are you in stock…?💖🥺👉👈

Sam: *hand shooting up to cover his mouth* *Long gasp*

Sam: *mouth twisting into a frown, putting his hand on his hip* It’s cuz I’m black, isn’t it?

Yuu: *suddenly realizing their mistake* Wh-what?! NO!!!

Sam: *even more pissed off now and shaking his head* Oh helllll no! I did not leave the Port o’ Bliss for some dumb ass students to make slavery jokes at me…

Yuu: *panicking* Sam, wait! I wasn’t trying to—!

Sam: *packing up everything in the shop into a comedically small briefcase* Fuck y’all racist little shits and yo boujee ass school!

Yuu: NO SAM! THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT!

Sam: *turning to leave the now empty shop with his briefcase* Crowley don’t pay me enough to deal with this shit.

Yuu: I WAS JUST TRYING TO FLIRT WITH YOU!

Sam: *walking out the door* Peace out bitches!

Yuu: I WAS JUST TRYING TO SAY I WANTED YOOOU!

[twistedtalking]

○-------->Your Path to Another World<--------●

♤---->The Impersonator<----->She/her<------♡

●~~~~~~~~Makes your wildest dreams~~~~~~●

○~~~~~~~~~~~~And Darkest Nightmares ~~~~~~~~○

●<~~~~~~~~~~~~come true~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~>●

----Welcome to Wonderland----

/Waiting list/

/characters/

/mutuals/

/anon/

/masterlist/

/rules/

Important: There are Bible verses after each fic post. If that makes you uncomfortable, please unfollow me.

Here's a post explaining why I add them.

[nrc-broadcasting]

A Deal Sealed In Gold

⋆﹥━━━━━━━🎧━━━━━━━﹤⋆

There has seem to be an issue(well, actually, just my dumba/ss); I answered this ask and instead of saving it to drafts, I posted it. I, for some reason, couldn’t post it privately or even do anything to it other than delete or edit it. So yeah, have a picture for a substitute.

A yawn erupted from Yuu’s mouth, minuscule amounts of morning dew still in their eyes.

They traced circles on their bedsheets, trying to grasp their consciousness before getting up.

Finally getting their bearings, the rose and stretched their arms out above their head.

After nudging Grim a few times to get him to wake up, they started making breakfast; it wasn’t much, since Ace and Deuce didn’t spend the night so their the only person eating, Grim only eats 2 tuna cans for breakfast these days.

“Grim~ time to get up,” Yuu said, clapping their hands loudly to try and get the sleeping cat on the counter to wake up again.

“HMMMM!” Grim mumbled begrudgingly.

“Oh?” Yuu raised an eyebrow.

“Get up now before I resort to hitting two pans together.” Yuu’s icy voice reached Grim, who shot up like he was electrocuted.

“I-I’m up, henchman!” Grim stuttered.

Yuu merely sighed. “Let’s just go and eat breakfast,” they said, opening a can of tuna.

After eating, they started brushing their teeth after helping Grim with his fur.

Deciding to review some e-mail requests, they picked up their phone with their toothbrush still in their mouth.

Their morning was peaceful. That was, until an e-mail mentioning a certain merman’s business made them choke on toothpaste.

•••

“Good morning, Twisted Wonderland! And by the Seven, do we have an interesting e-mail to read to day,” Yuu said into the mic, chuckling. A small smile etched on their face as the same upbeat music played in the background.

“Alright, right onto it I guess!” Yuu said, re-adjusting Grim’s position on their lap and giving him a few pets.

“This one comes from a listener named Annie, hope you tuned in today!” Yuu greeted.

“They ask; how did you get the upper hand on Azul Ashengrotto? It seems like making a deal with him is my last resort, so how do I avoid getting potentially exploited after signing a contract?” Yuu smiled, despite knowing they’ll get hell from the Octotrio later.

“Let me tell you the easy way out,” Yuu paused for suspense.

“Just don’t.” Yuu sighed, knowing they were probably in a tough place and thought that was their only option.

“Don’t even think about signing the contract.” Yuu said firmly.

“But should the situation really does call for it,” Yuu hesitated.

“Alright, Listen Up I suggest you read the contract more than 10 times to confirm that there’s no hidden clause, or offer something he’d deem worth more than your unique magic.” Yuu explained.

“I have faith that Azul’s stopped the way he…used to run his business. But after seeing people like you hesitate? The trust I have for Azul is still there, but I’ll go and check on Mostro Lounge myself anyway.” Yuu shook their head.

“You play stupid games, you win stupid prizes. Or in other words, you take ridiculous risks and bear the consequences.” Yuu said.

“That contract might look golden like daylight. But I guarantee you there are a myriad of ways you can do to solve your problems; though I might not know what they are exactly, but if a contract is the last resort,” Yuu paused

“It should be the last resort.” Yuu warned.

“If, even despite all this, you still decide to go through with it, try to fulfill your side of the contract. If the requests are near impossible for you, remember most contracts have loopholes,” Yuu said, careful to talk slowly so the listeners can absorb the information.

“The contract you’ll make with Azul is not an exception, so search for any loopholes you can play to your advantage.” Yuu advised.

“The worst that’ll happen when you don’t complete a contract is that you’ll have to work at Mostro Lounge; for how long? That’ll depend on Azul himself.” Yuu said.

Their phone let out a little ding, signifying a notification; Yuu raised their eyebrow.

“Oh hey, it’s a new e-mail from Annie! Happy to see you’re listening in today.” Yuu gave a small smile, lightening the atmosphere.

“Annie asks: What are the things he’d deem more valuable than my unique magic?” Yuu read out loud.

“Ah,” Yuu sweat-dropped.

“It would seem you asked the wrong person, I wouldn’t know as I don’t even have magic! I’m sorry but I don’t think I’ll be able to give you advice on that.” Yuu genuine laughed. They’re magicless, that’s a fact, so it would be useless to take it as an insult.

“But if you ask what I think he’d find valuable, I have a few answers.” Yuu said.

“Pearls, corals, magic crystals, blot crystals, and that’s just to name a few.” Yuu said, counting on their fingers.

“The head of two dead eels and of a squid would suffice too, if you’re feeling a bit petty…” Yuu mumbled, mostly to themselves.

“You can also compensate him by being a good costumer, buying products in bulk and such.” Yuu said, zoning out to try and think of more suggestions. But alas, nothing came to mind.

Shaking their head, they focused their attention back to the mic in front of them.

“So, Annie, did that answer your question?” Yuu asked.

Another ding from Yuu’s phone.

“They said: Yes, it did! I’m glad to be able to help.” Yuu said.

⋆﹥━━━━━━━🎧━━━━━━━﹤⋆

Our fairytale has come to an end.

[amora-ledezma]

Obey Me! Characters meeting Twisted Wonderland Characters

Request commented and made by @r4yyyyy

Hope it’s up to your standard<(^-^<)

May contain spelling errors. Maybe a bit OOC but eh.

Ace and Mammon

Riddle, Trey, and Lucifer already feel an headache coming-

At first they didn’t like each other all too much because both of them were glaring at each other every time the other interacted with Yuu or Yuki.

After confirming that no, the other isn’t trying to flirt with your best friend/human, they started to talk while Yuu and Yuki had to do something

And soon enough, Mammon was already asking Ace if he wanted to rob a bank.

And Ace being, well, Ace

Actually agreed to it, despite Deuce telling him that no, he shouldn’t do that unless they want both of their heads taken off by Riddle.

But Mammon persuaded Ace by telling him he, a demon, can easily defend both of them from Riddle, “just a human with magic” in his words.

Well, uh…

Not only did they fail to even get inside the bank, turns out Riddle’s collars affected demons way worst than humans.

Since demons don’t have a medium where magic flows out(ex. the magical pens NRC and probably RSA have) I’m going to take a guess that their magic circulates all over their body.

I’d compare their magic to like blood circulation or mana, so collaring Mammon would stop the magic from flowing into his head like blood would, making him light headed.

Now poor Ace has to deal with Riddle and Yuu’s anger.

In conclusion; chaos duo.

(Can be “chaos trio” but Deuce would probably refrain from interacting with those menaces)

Lucifer and Malleus

I’ve never heard silence quite this loud…

But once one of them decide to break the silence(probably by Malleus asking a question about something in Devildom that interested him) they’d probably exchange knowledge about their respective worlds.

“Overblots?” Lucifer would ask.

“Ah yes, I can see why someone would take interest in that, but first I should probably explain what exactly is ‘blot’.”

(Satan was interested too, he was probably eavesdropping)

The next time Yuu and Yuki see them both they’d be talking animatedly.

“Ohmygoshmyheart— why are they so handsome when they smile?!?!” Yuu and Yuki would collectively gush.

Sebek and Belphie

“Do you hate humans too?”

“Very much.”

And that sums up pretty much all their interactions.

But that’s because it’s the only thing they have in common.

If Sebek shouts and wakes up Belphie from his nap, hope to whatever deity they believe in the Valley of Thorns that Sebek gets back to Twisted Wonderland alive-

Someone get Beel and Silver to keep their brothers’ at bay.

Trey meeting Barbatos&Luke

Trey and Luke would get along immediately because of their interests in baking.

Barbatos was introduced to modern kitchen equipment and is absolutely fascinated.

Like Trey would show him a mixer and he’d be like “Dear Diavolo! You’re telling me I have been mixing things by hand when this contraption exists?!” and yes his eyes are indeed sparkling.

The fact that Devildom is actually behind modern technology is so hilarious to me-

All of them would exchange recipes.

Trey may or may not unofficially adopt/take Luke under his wing to teach him more about the recipes;)

Satan and Deuce

You’re just a little bit too much like me~

They both have a side to themselves that they want to hide from other people.

And the fact that both are related to their tempers is just— they pretty much kin each other ig.

Since Satan doesn’t really have a reason to dislike Deuce, he tolerates him.

Satan thought he and Deuce wouldn’t be that close.

*Satan’s older brother mode activated*

But he pretty much treats Deuce as if he’s his little brother.

Probably teaches and helps Deuce with his grades.

Would give Deuce books he has read and liked.

Satan probably teaches Deuce metaphors and euphemisms he had picked up over the years.

“Wait so washing feet can mean…?!”

“Hahaha, that would be the case.”

And by extension, Asmo would probably treat Deuce as if he’s his brother.

Asmo and Vil

Ahahaha, *Yuki and Epel nervously sweating*

Gosh if Vil even tries to point out something he thinks is “wrong” about Asmo’s skin or outfit?

He’d get it back 10 fold.

“Now that’s not how you wear a scarf you potato-”

“That should not be coming from someone whose colored hair tips look absolutely fried.”

“They look so damaged that it might even rival the way you part your hair and that ridiculous crown accessory you have.”

So Vil would either explode from anger or actually cry.

And Epel is just amazed. Like sparkles in his eyes amazed.

Rook is now walking eggshells around the both of them.

Asmo would probably call out Vil for his unnecessarily harsh insults/“advice” he gives to his dorm mates.

Asmo can and will annoy Vil by hypnotizing Rook and make him do whatever he wants to annoy Vil.

[myeagleexpert]

Incorrect Quotes

I'm SURE at some point they said that

Yuu: I'm in such a disgusting mood today that a bus passed by and I looked at the number and thought what a ridiculous numerical sequence Idia: forced celibacy - I am no longer interested in a living soul that inhabits the earth Ruggie: They romanticized the organ completely wrong, because the stomach is clearly much more emotional than the heart. Rook: First time I use an Uber motorcycle: the guy flirted with me, complimented me on my perfume, almost knocked me down, didn't let me be late. 5 stars because it had romance, adventure and a satisfactory conclusion. Leona: date idea I'll go to YOUR HOUSE, take a nap in YOUR bed and then leave

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hey headmage, remember the Tsums that came to school...twice? Well...look at this

*shows Crowley Tsum in hands*

What should we do?

Enter; An Unkindness of Ravens.

“Oh my, if it isn’t a mini-me!!” Crowley exclaimed. He excitedly scooped up his Tsum self from you, marveling at the strange creature. "Salutations, mini-me!"

The bean-shaped being perfectly fit in the palm of his hand. It matched his dress in every way, from the mask to the feathered cape and crisp suit and tie, all crowned off by a top hat on a mop of dark, loose waves. Bright yellow eyes blinked up at the new onlooker.

"Fufu, look at how handsome it is!" Crowley gushed, scratching the Tsum behind a tiny pointed ear. The Tsum shook with happiness and leaned into his finger. "But of course, anything made in my likeness is sure to be brimming with the same charm as I!"

“It fell from the sky and bonked me on the head while I was walking up the path to Ramshackle,” you explained. “It was right after got back from grocery shopping at Mister S's Mystery Shop and the Tsum started to go through my..."

"Aren't you an adorable thing! Yes you are!" Crowley's voice had taken on a high pitch--the sound of a doting parent to an infant or a beloved pet. "I'll bet you're as gracious as you are cute! Cootchie cootchie coo!"

"Um, headmaster? Headmaster? Hello-oooo, are you paying attention to anything I'm saying?"

"Hmm, what?" Crowley startled, registering you for the first time since entering his office. His tone, suddenly dismissive. "Yes, yes, I am listening and taking your report very seriously, Prefect!"

"Great, so you'll take it off my hands for me. it's been a real troublemaker, and I don't know if I can deal with and everything else on my plate."

"A troublemaker? This little fellow? Preposterous! Why, he wouldn't cause trouble for anyone." Crowley patted the Tsum on its head (which blended with its rounded body). It seemed to smile at him, bouncing in place. "Perhaps you might be able to assist me with my oh-so important administrative work? There are some documents that need to be reviewed and signed."

He lowered the Tsum, allowing it to hop onto his desk, where a few papers laid. You watched in silence as the Tsum explored its new surroundings. Poking, bouncing, prodding. His inkwell, the quill.

Anything but the documents—which went completely ignored.

The Tsum turned away, disinterested. It preoccupied itself with taking in the shininess of a nearby candelabra.

You raised an eyebrow at Crowley. It really is exactly like him.

"I-I'm sure he's taking his time! What matters is the quality of work produced, not the quantity nor how quickly is it completed!"

As he protested, the Tsum padded to the edge of the desk and stared over its edge. Then it tipped over, diving into an open desk drawer. The Tsum's rump stuck up in the air, happily wiggling as it swam in a sea of wrapped cookies and candies.

The headmaster let out a distressed squawk. "W-Wait, don't go in there! That's my top-secret snack stash...!!"

He yanked the Tsum out by a stubby foot, dangling it like a ragdoll. A macaron was in the Tsum's grasp, rapidly vanishing into its nonexistent mouth as if being sucked in by a vacuum. Crowley's eyes bulged.

"I tried to warn you," you shrugged. "It finished a whole loaf of bread from my groceries before I fished it out. Speaking off..." You extended a hand, palm up. "I'll need more monthly allowance to replace that bread."

His jaw dropped. Not at your misfortune, you suspected, but at the idea of having to shell out more money.

"Wh-What! Why must I be responsible for such a thing when I'm not responsible for the damage to begin with!?"

"You called it a 'mini-me'," you pointed out, "so take some responsibility for 'yourself' and make things right."

"I-I know I may have said that on impulse, but upon closer inspection... In what way does a Tsum that acts carefree, shirks work, and stuffs his face resemble me?!"

Uh, in every way...

"In any case, I am far too busy with my duties as headmaster to put aside time to monitor this hooligan," Crowley declared. The Tsum writhed in his hold, reminding you of a pathetic worm speared on a hook. "However, it happens that I know of a proven beast tamer who is perfectly suited to keeping him in check!"

His gaze settled on you, and your stomach sank.

Crowley grinned, approaching you and placing the Tsum on your shoulder. It immediately nuzzled up to you, nestling in the crook of your neck.

"I'm counting on you, Prefect!" he chirped, giving a strong, encouraging pat on your back. "My expectations for my students are quite high, and you are certainly no exception to that rule~"

Typical kiss-ups, both the Tsum and the real Crowley.

[rrasado]

Interaction for the Scarabia boys

another filipino mc cuz why not

"Y’know this dorm literally feels like home, the food, the clothes and the heat oohh how I wish I could take you both to my home country too”

"Really? Well I'm glad it makes you feel at home here hehe"

"So your world also shares geographical conditions with Twisted Wonderland..?"

Satisfaction and curiosity bounced between the Dorm Leader and his Vice. Kalim's gaze fell short when he pressed a fist to his palm, stricken with an idea. "Oh oh!— tell us more about your place, prefect! What if we hosted a party here themed around your native land :D?"

"Kalim be mindful of the time— we've just conducted a party last week." Though a smaller part of Jamil thought it wasn't a terrible idea, after all if it was already similar in the first place it wouldn't be too much of a shift, right?

"Pfft- I didn't say it's soon though, maybe a month from now so everyone can unwind after finals 🤔." The Vice dorm leader can only sigh before looking back to the prefect.

"You wouldn't mind indulging me on a few recipes? I'm sure it's nothing alien in general. Now don't give me that look... I never said I was against this." Trying to mimic something from another world...the thought was oddly enticing, it can be good practice for if he decides to see the world.

"We can even serve that turon dish you made for us last time! C'mon it may be a month away but I wanna know what I need to prep—"

⸢𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓 ➽ 𝐒𝐄𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄⸥

[captainjacklyn]

Twisted Wonderland Incorrect Quotes #1 :

Ace & Deuce : Be safe Mc/Yuu !

Yuu/MC : That is a promise !

They weren't safe.

They took the 'be safe' for 'be gone'.

[sprite-real]

Idk about y’all but Rook as Batman and Idia as the Joker in this scenario, am I the only one who sees it?

[egophiliac]

well, I can't say I expected the new chapter to feature Idia (metaphorically) going to (metaphorical) hell, getting a pep talk from his (metaphorical) Phantom brother which helps him finally move on once and for all from his brother's death, and (metaphorically) overblotting again to fight his way back out of (metaphorical) hell, only to have his darkest fear (non-metaphorically) come true when his mom goes through his computer and finds all his secret files. but I am glad it did!

also this is all a flashback for the purpose of explaining to our group what the heck is going on (whether or not any of it is getting through is another matter)