#underneath the coat he's mary. and john doesn't like that one bit so dean learned to hide it
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no but really it's funny sam thinks dean is john 2.0 when s1 dean is just. content to take on random cases and help save some people and is trying to do some good w/ the hand he's been dealt and isn't all that interested in his father's revenge quest and up until then has always had to play the mediator and swallow down his own feelings and anger. while sam's the one who quickly becomes obsessed w/ revenge the minute he loses jess and finding the thing that killed her and is quick to anger. "you're more like him than i'll ever be" "i'll take that as a compliment" "you can take that however you like" etc etc
#i know i'm not saying anything new and my dean understanders all know dean is mary's mirror and sam is john's but !!!!#it's so so loud in the early seasons. soooo loud !!!#and i think sam insists dean must be more like john must be just like john to convince himself that he's not like him#he looks at dean and thinks 'well i'm nothing like dean. dean's [lists 2 dimensional dean traits he thinks make up all of dean]#'and i'm nothing like that so therefore i'm not like dad' but like. all those dean traits are fake or surface level or overcompensating#everything sam thinks dean is is just a too big coat dean puts on to conceal everything real abt himself#underneath the coat he's mary. and john doesn't like that one bit so dean learned to hide it#anyways i'm rambling and losing threads but bottom line. sam is so much closer to john.#you know when you're standing too up close to something you can't see it properly? yea that's sam as john's mirror#his nose is pressed against the mirror he can't see that he's literally john's reflection.#family dynamics#siblings siblings#sam studies#dean studies#vic.txt
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