#unlocked a core memory yesterday everyone

[oflgtfol]

we are so back (in my star wars era)

[tired-truffle]

Můj Miláček

A Viktorxfem!reader fic

Word Count: 3.7k

Part 14/16

Warnings - Description of serious injuries

I apologize in advance.

I based this chapter off of The Night We Met by Lord Huron if you want a music to accompany the chapter

When you woke up you were alone in your bed, Sky's urn and notebook were nowhere in sight. Your sleep had been restless, although it was well into the next day, you had slept for a long time. Your body had been exhausted and took its time to recover.

You replayed the events of the night before over and over again in your head. If only you'd been quicker or stronger you think you could have saved your friend. If you'd risked losing control to the power of your magic, you could have stopped Sky's death. You had been so worried about losing yourself that you hadn't considered that you'd lose a friend instead. Viktor's death was slow, if you needed to you could risk it at the last minute. There was no doubt in your mind that you would do that for him, but it wasn't the same with Sky, she hadn't had that luxury. If you could go back you would absorb the Hexcore before it absorbed her, even if it tore you apart, you would do it for her.

It still didn't feel real, that Sky was gone. You kept expecting to hear her voice, her bubbly laugh, but all you heard was the cold empty silence of the room around you.

You got out of bed, swinging your feet over the side. You grabbed a pair of casual clothes that were tossed over your nightstand and started to dress. You figured you'd head to the lab, you might find Viktor there.

You weren't hungry, the images of Sky's death seared into your brain, chasing away any thoughts of eating. You were dismayed when you arrived at the lab to find it empty. With nothing better to do, you started to clean, organizing all the papers that had flown around the lab yesterday, and giving the orb a wide berth. It spit and crackled at you, warning you to keep your distance. You decided to listen this time.

You hadn't thought about your homeworld in a while, but as you worked you found yourself wondering what your life would have been like had you remembered your past. Why had you been the one to come here? It seems you'd done little good so far. That ethereal voice had said that you had the knowledge to save them, you just didn't know how to unlock it.

It appeared that when you gained more magic you had more visions, though they hadn't exactly been useful so far. You looked towards a spare Gemstone, you wonder how many it would take to unlock more visions, maybe ones you could even use.

Frustration swirled in your chest, why couldn't you just remember something useful for once in your Goddamn life? Why did you have to stand by and watch the people you care about die? Was there nothing you could do that didn't risk the safety of everyone in Piltover?

It was then that it hit you, like a stone sinking in your gut; a memory, one from your world. You didn't fully understand it, it was patchy at best, most of the space you could see was fuzzy, with no distinguishable details to tell you where you were. That didn't matter, the only thing that mattered was what was on the screen in front of you. Jayce and Viktor were in the Council room, you couldn't hear what they were saying, but it looked serious. Though that wasn't what made your chest trill in panic. Chilling you to your core was a huge Hextech bomb flying towards them, shattering the glass window as Councillor Medarda glanced over her shoulder, her gold plating sparkling.

You didn't have time to think about why or how you had seen this. To your horror, along with the memory came the knowledge that this event was going to happen today and very soon.

You were about to race out of the lab when you realized that you were not strong enough to stop a bomb. If you got there with enough time then you'd be able to get everyone out safely, but if you weren't... You couldn't take that chance.

You grabbed a small pouch, careful to not make physical contact, you deposited three Gemstones into it.

You ran as quickly as your feet could carry you, channeling your magic to boost your speed. You looked out the windows as you ran, no bomb in the sky that you could see, but once it was shot there would only be a few seconds before you lost what remained of the people you cared about.

As you approached the doors to the Council chambers, the guards looking at you warily, you looked out the window one last time, your heart sinking into your stomach, the bomb was on its way.

"Halt!" One guard yelled, brandishing his weapon, "The Council is in a private session, you may not enter."

You didn't have time to convince them to let you in. You held out your hands and used your magic to put walls up in front of the guards, giving you time to squeeze past them. Your adrenaline was pounding and there was no stopping you as you shoved open the Council Chamber doors.

When you stepped foot inside, all eyes turned to you.

"Mila, you can't be here." Jayce snapped at you. You weren't looking at him, your eyes were trained on the bomb that was two seconds away from smashing through the window. It was then that Councillor Medarda started to turn, just like in your memory, and you acted.

You thrust your hand into the pouch, grabbing all of the Gemstones and allowing them to flow their power through you. Your brain felt foggy as you wasted no time in throwing your arms forward and pushing them to the side, channeling all your magic, all your heightened emotions, into throwing all the Council members as far from the middle of the room as you could, your magic creating a shield over them to protect them from the blast.

You made eye contact with Viktor where he lay tumbled on the floor. He reached towards you, realizing what was about to happen, what you'd already done. You had enough magic to save them, but it was unstable, it was concentrated on others and you couldn't seem to figure out how to use it to protect yourself too.

Maybe if you'd had more time, more teachings in the ways of magic, but you didn't. By protecting the others, you left nothing to cover yourself.

You turned to the side, attempting in vain to lessen the blow. The last thing you remembered was a blinding flash of blue light engulfing you, searing you as you were tossed back, shrapnel impaling your body. You were pretty sure you yelled in pain, but you couldn't hear over the thundering noise of the bomb as it tore through the Council chamber, flying directly at you. Your world turned to black as something solid cracked against your skull. Your mind drifted into unconsciousness, your last thoughts praying that you had done enough to protect Viktor.

***

"Are you sure about this Viktor?" You could hardly understand the words being spoken over you, your body jostling, pain flaring through you, as whoever was holding you ran, "How do you know you can trust him?"

"You heard what the doctors said, Jayce, she will not make it with their medicine so either way she could die, I am not willing to do nothing when there are other options, as much as you disagree."

You recognized that voice, his soft accent a comfort to you. As long as Viktor was there you would be safe. You could trust him. Even if you didn't you had no choice as darkness took over your mind once more

***

One thing you knew for sure was that you were terrified and in agony, more so than you had ever been in in your entire life. Your body felt like it had been burned, beaten, and then burned again, everything was on fire. It felt like your veins were filled with molten lava, and your head filled with bees. Your magic was like electricity under your skin, charging up and ready to explode.

"You didn't tell me she's a mage!" A voice hissed from above you.

"Why does that matter?" Viktor argued, ending his sentence with a choking cough.

"She's unstable!" It felt like you were drowning in a pool of your own blood, gasping for air that wasn't there.

"I don't care, just do it!" Viktor exclaimed.

You heard a frustrated growl from the other person, "Then get out of my way."

That was when you felt it start to surge through you, like roaring water that had just broken through a dam; power, like you'd never felt before.

It crashed into your system, making you writher and thrash on the cold metal surface. A scream ripped its way out of your mouth, breaking through the buzzing in your ears. You needed it to go away, the pain, the rush of power, it was all too much.

You sprang up, magic bursting forth in all directions. You couldn't control it, just like Heimerdinger had said, it now controlled you.

You opened your eyes in a panic, your chest heaving as you caught your breath, desperately trying to reel your magic back in. Your brain felt like it was being pulled in a million different directions, unable to process what had happened.

You were in a dark and damp cave, the green luminescent lighting coming from the tank filled with a strange floating creature and a bare light bulb hanging above you were the only sources of light. You knew this place, you'd seen it in a vision, this was Singed's lab.

There was a dirty mirror on the wall in front of you, your reflection making you wish you had kept your eyes closed.

Horrific was the first word that came to mind. The bomb did a number on you. You'd turned to the side, so your left half took the worst of it. It had burned through your pant leg, leaving scorch marks up to your hip. Your upper clothes were torn to shreds, the shrapnel had cut you to pieces, there were so many wounds running up your left arm and side of your torso you didn't know where one scar began and the other ended. The left side of your face now had three long gashes marring your once soft features.

But that wasn't all.

On top of your injuries was what you now realized had caused that surge of power that felt like it was eating you from the inside out. Shimmer coursed through your veins, shining through your skin with a light pink glow, traveling all along your body. Your eyes, once bright and happy, now matched the colour of the lines running through you.

Laying on the ground under the mirror was Singed, slumped, and unconscious. Had you done that?

You were alive, but what had you become?

"You're okay."

You weren't sure if 'okay' was the right word, 'on fire' or 'filled with nails' seemed to fit much better.

You looked towards the source of the voice, gasping when you saw Viktor, slumped over in a chair a few feet from you.

You rushed to get off the blood-covered table you were on, stumbling as your legs adjusted to standing once again. You knelt in front of him, your magic instinctively reaching out, taking away his pain, but even in the power-fuelled state, you knew it was too late. It didn't matter what you did, death had marked his soul for the taking.

Your eyes filled with tears, this couldn't be happening. Even with six Gemstones and Shimmer, you were unable to heal him.

"But you won't be." You sobbed, cupping his cheek with your shaking hand.

"I already knew that," He said it like it was no big deal when to you it was the most earth-shattering sentence he had ever uttered, "But I couldn't let you go down with me, Miláček."

You lean forward, pressing your foreheads together, shaking your head. No, this wasn't supposed to happen. You had found a way to heal Viktor with the Hexcore, you were so close, just not close enough.

"Please don't leave me, I can't do this without you." You begged. You needed him to stay, you couldn't be in a world that didn't have Viktor, not now that you knew what it was like to always have him there, his light laugh and small grin brightening any situation. How were you supposed to live without him?

"You're stronger than you give yourself credit for," Viktor's breath was warm on your lips, tangy with the smell of blood. Whether it was yours or his you couldn't tell.

"I don't want this life without you, Viktor, I only ever wanted you," There were so many conflicting feelings swirling in your throat, your eyes stinging with tears as they splashed onto Viktor's lap.

"You have me, you've always had me." The sheer adoration in his voice pulled another sob from you.

Your world was coming crashing down around you, but those words spurned you into action. You launched yourself forward, closing the distance between you as you pressed your lips to his. You weren't sure if you were dreaming this moment into reality, but when his fingers curled themselves into your hair, latching on like you were the only thing holding him to this life, the fervour with which his lips moved against yours, you knew it had to be real.

However, that meant that Viktor dying was also real, and that made you hold on all the more.

You broke apart for air, a sob escaping your throat as you saw his eyes start to droop, his heartbeat slowing under your fingers.

"Viktor, I love you." You held his head up in your hand, "Please don't go."

Viktor gave a weak smile and light chuckle, "Můj Miláček, my darling, I would never leave you."

You held his face in your hands, your heart pounding in your throat as his eyes rolled back and he slumped forward, his head resting on your shoulder.

Your limbs felt weak as you fell into his lap, clutching at his waist, a scream ripping out of your throat, so loud that it seemed to shake the cave around you.

"Viktor, please, come back to me." You cried, the familiar words shattering your heart as you realized that from the first moment you saw him, this was where fate had decided it would end. No matter what you did, Viktor was bound to die, saving you.

Grief rips through you, rippling with magic as you lose all sense of sanity. The only thing that had been holding you together was Viktor, his still warm body sitting lifeless before you. He wasn't breathing, but as your magic took control you noticed a faint heartbeat coming from Viktor's chest. It was weak, struggling as he desperately clung to life. It was your only hope, and you had to act fast, or Viktor's death would be on your hands.

"No." You spat out, standing up on shaky legs. Your hands alight with flames, spreading out until they surrounded you, "I can stop this, I just need more strength."

You focused as hard as you could, trying to ignore the pain ripping through you. You let your magic surround you, lifting you off the ground as you threw your hand out, burnt palm up, in front of you. Flames swirled around you as you spoke in a multi-tone voice. You didn't know what you were saying, it was in a language you couldn't understand, but it was ancient, primal, you let your instincts take over as you called for the one thing that could still save Viktor; the Hexcore.

With a shrill scream that made your ears bleed, the Hexcore burst into the space above your hand in a fiery explosion of purple flame.

"Stop this!" It hissed, "You cannot control us! You cannot take what we rightfully earned." Rightfully earned your ass, it had stolen so much from you, it was time to bring it to justice.

"This one's for Sky," You growled, bringing your palm up to catch the orb in a strong grip.

As soon as you connected with the Hexcore, your breath was stolen from your lungs, the power shooting through you, awakening strength you never knew you could possess. The orb shriveled in your palm, shrieking as its life force was sucked out. Your head was thrown back, your mouth open in a silent cry as you struggled to manage the influx of magic. It was more than you'd ever absorbed, you feared it was going to be too much, but you had to do it. You had to save Viktor.

"It's going to be okay," A soft voice said, someone you hadn't expected to hear ever again. Your heart broke as you got to hear Sky one last time, "Let me guide you."

The searing pain dulls as you feel a warmth fill your mind, a familiar giggle ringing in your ears. Tears spill from your eyes, you wish you could have saved her too.

"You've set me free from the Hexcore, I'm no longer bound in its suffering, Thank you, Mila," Sky's voice whispered, calming your thoughts, "Now go save our genius."

Your body dropped to the ground with a loud thud, you'd managed to absorb the Hexcore, thanks to Sky, but that didn't mean you were able to control the power surging inside.

You heard a laugh to your right, a scream, a cry, all around you. You swiveled your head, your brain was foggy as you looked at a cave filled with images of yourself. Most were crying, some were yelling, others were cackling with anguish-filled glee. It was terrifying, and even more terrifying than that was the fact that you didn't care. All feelings had drained from you except for one; rage.

You could feel the power coursing through you, waking up parts of yourself you hadn't known existed; dark parts and memories of a life long forgotten. The images of your time on Earth swirled before your eyes, filling in all the gaps in your knowledge. You had finally found the key, the Hexcore opening up that part of your brain that had slept dormant for so long. You had listened to Heimerdinger, his warnings of your uncontrollable magic. You think you should have punted that old crow to the curb years ago and taken the power that was rightfully yours. The power that now threatened to overwhelm you and consume you in its desperate attempt to destroy.

"Burn it to the ground." One version of you said, spit flying out of their mouth as they stumbled to the ground.

"Destroy this world for what it took from you." Said another, their body shaking with anger.

You stood up, looking down at Viktor's slack face. No, that's not what you had to set out to do. You never wanted to cause others to suffer, you weren't about to start now. You didn't need to cause pain, you needed to save him.

You ripped open his shirt and cried out as your hands connected with his chest, the energy flowing down your arms and into him in bright purple light. It was like fire racing through you, eating your brain alive. You held on, metal growing under your fingers to match that of his leg. Your chest heaved as you pushed yourself to the limit, the metal working up his throat and the side of his head, covering his ears. You pulled back, no longer able to continue. Your magic didn't want to be used to heal, it wanted to destroy.

You squeezed your eyes shut, shaking your head to try to disperse the images around you. It didn't work, they only got louder.

They turned towards you, "It didn't work," They said in unison, their voices bouncing off the cave walls.

"You couldn't save him, the city failed him, now let us out, let us wreak the havoc they deserve for what they have done."

You looked back at Viktor, panic settling in like a second skin. You could have sworn you saw his chest start to rise, but your vision blurred, you couldn't tell if it was real or if your brain was making it up in an attempt to soothe you.

"Stop it!" You cried, clutching your head, the voices pounding on your skull like a brass knocker on a wooden door, "Leave me alone!"

"We can't," A voice said to your left, "We are you."

You sobbed, it was all too much, you were going to explode. You could feel the magic build in your chest, threatening to release itself. Heimerdinger had said Motus Mages had destroyed whole cities before, you had no doubt that you could do that, nothing in Piltover was strong enough to stop you. You should have listened to his warnings, even if you had managed to bring Viktor back from the brink of death he wouldn't survive whatever was about to become of you.

You sank to your knees, looking up at the ceiling, your hands clutching at your chest as your tears left tracks down your cheeks, "Someone, please help me."

Like an answer to a prayer you had expected to go unheard, you were given little time to react as a bright blue swirl of light opened up beneath you. You looked once more at Viktor's still form, the magic glinting off his metal chest. There was nothing more you could do for him, you'd pushed your body and mind to its breaking point. You let yourself fall, the floor disappeared beneath you, swallowing you up into an electric blue void you hadn't seen in eight years.

A/N:

Please don't kill me! I promise this story still ends with Viktor and Reader happy, you'll be getting answers next Chapter as an apology 😬

Please check out @sunofzaun amazing artwork for this chapter

Next Chapter

[thoughtfullyyoungduck]

we fell in love in October

A/N: this was requested by anon, I hope you enjoy. Let me know what you think! 

Summary: One where the reader and Ben were together in high school and left Derry together and when they come back they are married and everyone is surprised to see them still together

A phone call that your entire adult life is based on stacks of self-imagined and wrongful placed memories is best not received in a an overseas, foreign country with your husband ten thousand miles away. The trip it selves originally lasted no more than five days, but after Mike’s ring, you cut it short and immediately booked a flight destination Derry Maine after two. 

It was a work trip meant to educate you on all the new techniques and information you missed out on during your two year hiatus, and the company you represented, Thomas Cook, is an English company, so England was the best place for you to learn.

You and Ben had been away from each other every once in a while, so neither of you made it a big deal to spend a few days apart, but Ben nor you expected the phone call that shook both of to your core.

Following a meeting on etiquette, you returned to your hotel room for the night, unlocking your phone and noticing that you missed a few of ben’s calls. That was odd, considering Ben always patiently awaits for you to initiate contact so he wouldn’t ever interrupt you in case you’re busy.  

You were planning on returning the call the moment you arrived in the privacy of your room, when another person tried to contact you, and this time it wasn’t someone you recognized. The number came from Derry, and although that name sounded vaguely familiar, you couldn’t pinpoint an exact memory to place it.

Thinking that it might have been an assistant reaching out to you, you picked up the phone and listened as the elevator slowly rose floor above floor, trickling painstakingly slower than a snail, and making little bump noises at every level.

The only other person in the elevator with you, a coworker, swore to never reveal the undignified yelp you let out as Mike reintroduced himself to you, claiming to be one of your childhood best friend and begging you to come home to aid in another battle.

It clicked then why Ben never let up the constant stream of messages and bells, and why you always felt like you knew since the beginning of your life, because you had.

Every new thing Mike explained to you solidified itself in stone, as real as the clothes you wore and the floor you stood on. The name pennywise revolted you, every hair on your body standing up in high alert as a fight or flight reaction, transporting you back the summer you turned thirteen years old and an inhuman thing haunted your nightmares and your daily life.

By the end of the call, you craved Ben’s calming presence and his sweet nothing whispers he shook out of his sleeve at times you dreamed of shadows curling up your form and pulling you down to the deepest pits of despair with futile strength.

It made sense now why you blanched every time someone asked you where you and Ben met, or how long you two had been dating before marrying in a forest Ben decorated with fairy lights and flowers that sprouted a smell so delicious you caught a few guest sneaking them with them at the end.

‘Mike?’, You asked right before he launched into another aspect of his story. Part of you felt immensely sad, at the idea of Mike staying behind in Derry, helpless to do anything as you all forgot and moved on, but another part of you couldn’t care less at the moment, talking to Ben the only thing you knew would calm you down.

‘Yeah Y/N?’

‘Did you speak to Ben yet?’ In a way, you knew the answer. The none stop flood wouldn’t exist if he didn’t, but as long as an ounce of doubt remained, you were not picking up.

‘Yeah, I talked to him. Wait, you remember him?’

In a not so proud moment, you ended the connection abruptly, and pressed the icon next to Ben’s name, his contact photo one you snapped when he designed the new home and proudly presented it to you as a surprise.

An answer came at once, before the first ring even echoed, the breathing down the other line harsh and brisk.

‘Y/N, thank god. Are you okay?’ His deep, sturdy voice anchored you back to real life, a tranquility that he somehow always possessed reducing your stress levels.

‘I’m fine honey. I’m fine, are you?’ It’s a throw away question for sure, since Ben would do anything in his power to let you remain sane, and expressing his own worries is not part of that plan. Not being able to be there for your husband when the world is tilted up its head is killing you.

‘Sweets, don’t worry about me, worry about you. I can fly over to England tonight if that’s of any use.’

Frankly, getting to Ben and sifting through the confusing onslaught of emotions and recollections with him lists higher on your priority list above everything else, but you can’t do that to the others.

‘No, Ben listen to me.’ Your voice remains flat and drained of anything other than firmness, a benefit of working with customers you have required over the years. Freak out postponed ‘till you dragged your suitcase from terminal to terminal, for you had to arrange plans first.

Ben would most likely think with his heart and prefer to be around you, but by the time he would land in England and the two you transfer to another plane, the other losers – you named each other that if you recall correctly – may be dead.

‘Book a flight to Derry, and I’ll do the same. I won’t travel as fast as you, so assure the others that I’m on my way.’

‘But Y/N’, Ben protested, his desire to protect you standing in the way of common sense, god you adore this man.

‘Ben please,’ a droplet of tears drip on your cheek, confronting you with the realization that you cried.

‘Okay,’ Ben gives in, the displeasement out in the open, but listening to you none the less.

---

The old clubhouse is not as hard to find as you originally thought, the way to the spot from your old house purely muscle memory that allows you to pinpoint the exact location.

You know the reunion of the losers already transpired yesterday, Ben updating you throughout the night, but your flight only touched base this morning. Derry is an old town with reception towers spaced out and far apart, resulting in barely any communication between you and Ben.

The Derry-Inn was exempt, and so the next best guess as to where they could be was that the losers retreated to the one place radiating with love and untainted by the dirty hands of the towns curse.

The hushed talking under the hatch prove you right, and a smile carefully pokes through the bland face you’ve sported for two days, and regardless of how crazy it might seem, a blanket of safeness falls upon you, creating a barrier between you and the problems about to head on your path.

You reach down to rattle the hatch, a warning that you’re coming down to the others, and the swing it upon, dust flying in your face in such a huge amount it suffocates you. While coughing, your hand flags away the excess dust swarming around you, gulping down breathes of fresh air.

The leader creaks under your weight, but surprisingly you’re not required to bow down to fit into the clubhouse, a comfortable height for you to ease into.

You misjudge the last step, losing your footing and tumbling down the last two trads with a yap at the pain radiating from your feet up your leg, falling down faster than you should have.

Richie shrieks in fear, jumping several steps away from his spot under the stairs to hide behind Mike, the entire losers club swiftly glancing at you.

‘Ha’, Eddie exclaims once his brain catches up to his sight and he apprehends its you. ‘That’s what you get fucker, that’s karma.’

‘Yeah? Was it karma when I fucked your wife as good as I fucked your mom?’ Richie inquires, smirking at the reaction Eddie provides him.

‘That’s fucking disgusting and not the definition of karma by the way.’

‘You guys are clearly still the same’, you mutter, forgoing the pain and observing the interaction between the two best friends.

‘Y/N’, Bev breathes, approaching you with a pep in her step and halting in front of you, allowing you to close the distance and embrace the girl that you forget about yet missed so dearly.

With most of the losers here, it’s hard to grasp that you ever omitted them, for they colored your childhood in so many ways and are intermittent with the person you are today.

Ben shuffles closer too, but waits forbearance so Bev can take her time. The other losers greet you with a smile and a far-off hello, happy to see you again after so long. After Bev stops hugging you and walks away to further explore the shelter, Ben stoops in and kisses you with a short and soft peck. He’s always respectful of you, to the point he usually won’t kiss you in public so you’re comfortable, but this is an exception.

‘Ben, man didn’t you claim to have married someone?’ Richie wonders aloud and gaps at the two of you, resembling a fish out of water.

‘Yes’, you drag out, confusion lilting your words, ‘we are.’ The losers pause, including Mike, the wheels turning in their head to process the new information.

‘You guys got m-m-married?’ Bill questions, his eyes sparkling with happiness for his friends, all the times he psyched Ben up so he gained the courage to ask you out on a date in high school.

‘Yeah for two years now’, Ben proudly proclaims, resting his hand on the small of your back to stable himself and hide the way he falters when everyone zero’s in  on him.

‘In October. Ben arranged the whole thing in the woods with a fairy tale theme.’ You nearly add that it was perfect, but that’s a lie. Something was missing that day, like a stubborn smudge you tried very hard to remove yet remained. You never shared it with Ben, because he thought of every detail and ever speck to a T, and by all means it should’ve been flawless. Maybe that smudge was the insistent memory of your friend not being there to support you like you wished they were. Despite not sharing your concern with Ben, you wonder if he experienced the same thing and was afraid to inform you.

‘Wait, do I remember this wrong or did you guys start dating in October too?’ Bev quizzes.

You peer up at Ben for guidance, but he comes across just as clueless as you. It could very well be, and looking back on it, the two of you did instantly reach a consensus about the date of the wedding. Perhaps the remnants of your childhood manifested in the date, and if they did, the next anniversaries will be extra special than so far.

Right now, it’s essential your focus lays elsewhere, like in how to defeat IT for good this time, so no other lives are cut short because of an intergalactic demon.

Ben links your hands together, a tight grip that lets you know he’s right beside you, and he’s not going anywhere. The two of you together are equipped for anything.

[babyloontrash]

Blue-Eyed Boy (L.H.)

Summary:  Girl wakes up next to a pretty boy she doesn't know the name of. All she remembers is that they spent an exciting night together. Maybe they can have a fun morning too? (SMUT)

Words: 3,6k

Her body, all her muscles felt sore. Almost as if after a long and very exhausting workout. Yawning, she wanted to stretch, give her poor body some relief. But in that moment she realized that extending her arms up was not even an option. One was already far above her head and when she tried to move it she found out that she /couldn't /?

Her eyes shot open very quick, and the light in the room made her squint them again. There was a sharp pain in her head, reminding her of how many drinks she had last night. Groaning, she looked around and a small frown appeared on her face when she realized the bedroom she was in was not her own. Briskly, she turned her head to look up and check her hand. A cold piece of metal was around her wrist while the other handcuff was closed around one of the bars of the bed frame.

Hungover or not, immediately she was wide awake as the terrible panic washed over her. She tried moving her hand again, making the cuffs rattle against the bed.

"Fuck. Fuck. Fuck."

This wasn't good. This wasn't good at all. She was naked in a stranger's bed, handcuffed. Thank God that her phone was within a reach on the bedside table near her. She just got her hands on it and unlocked the screen, so she could let someone know what had happened to her when the mattress suddenly shifted and she heard a snoring sound.

Her glance quickly turned in that direction.

There was a beautiful boy sleeping, his blonde curls a mess not only on the pillow but his gentle face too. A couple of annoying strands would not give him peace and simply wouldn't stop tickling his nose.

The longer she watched him, the calmer she became since the fond memories of last night began to fill her mind.

How this blue-eyed boy turned all flustered when she called him out for skipping the line at the bar. He insisted on buying her a drink as an apology. She wasn't going to say no to a free drink from a hot guy. Nor would she turn him and his friends down when they wanted to join their table. The guys were a lot of fun, and they were all pretty easy on the eye as well. It would be a lie if she said that she had kept her eyes on anyone else than him, though. Everyone who watched them interact in that club could clearly tell something was going to happen between them. They chatted with each other and laughed at each other's jokes way more than they should have, considering how bad they truly were and as the night progressed, they became less and less shy with each other too.

It started with just a soft touch on his forearm, moved to his hand on her thigh and eventually turned into his lips kissing on the spot under her ear after he informed her about how hot she looks in her outfit.

She later willingly left the club with him and even more excitedly let herself indulge in all the activities that followed after they closed the door of his apartment behind them.

Handcuffs included.

No wonder she woke up this exhausted. It was quite an eventful night.

The boy beside her let out a bothered huff when he moved his head slightly, trying to finally shake his hair away but with no success. She placed her phone down as she was no longer full of fear and terror and simply reached to brush his hair away carefully, so she wouldn't wake him.

It was amazing to watch his sleeping expression change from frustrated to a peaceful one, his eyebrows relaxing and the frown leaving his adorable face.

She smiled a little bit. So it wasn't only the alcohol that made him look so cute in her eyes yesterday. She was tempted to softly run her hand over his stubbled cheek, but she stopped herself from doing so with a scoff.

Pretty or not, this was just a one night stand. You don't get all soft around those. You just get dressed and leave. Sometimes thank them or even stay for a cup of coffee in case you get caught while leaving.

That was what she should do. Leave. Now. Before he wakes up and things get all awkward, as they often do after nights like this one.

Sneaking out of the bed wouldn't be as easy now, though.

She tried sitting up slightly, looking for the key she would use to set herself free. It didn't seem to be anywhere near her reach and so she soon began examining the handcuffs as they were. There surely had to be a way how to open them in case that the key would get lost. She could swear she almost broke her fucking wrist there while trying to get out of the damn thing. After a couple of minutes of no luck, she collapsed back into the mattress, muttering something to herself in annoyance.

The handcuffs seemed like a good idea and they definitely were a lot of fun earlier but now... Things would definitely be considerably easier if he just used the ropes.

"God, help me," she whispered anxiously, closing her eyes while she took in a deep, encouraging breath.

Damn, she really hated doing this.

Nervously, she moved her hand out to touch his arm. It was just a simple poke. Then another one. One more. The boy continued sleeping like a log.

"Hey."

"Hey, wake up." She tried once more, shaking his body slightly.

Finally, the guy next to her began to stir and soon his bright blue eyes popped open and met hers.

"Sorry." She pulled frantically her hand back again.

The corners of his mouth curled up into a wide smile as he saw her, and the longer he watched her, the more amused he seemed.

"You know I've already seen it all, right?" He asked teasingly. "There's absolutely no need to be covering up."

Somewhere on the inside, she knew that, but it was her first instinct to tug the blanket closer to her chest anyway.

He moved to lie on his back, rubbing his face to fully wake himself up.

"Is your head hurting just as badly?"

"Can you uncuff me?"

His eyes landed on her again, flicking between her lovely face and the hand that was handcuffed to the bed frame. He simply couldn't keep the chuckle in, and she rolled her eyes at his reaction.

"Completely forgot I didn't get around to take them off."

"Glad you find it funny. Just get me rid off them, so I can leave."

His back was already turned towards her as he searched through his bedside table. When he heard the second sentence though, he glanced towards her, clearly surprised.

"You gotta go somewhere?"

Those words caught you off guard for a little bit, blinking multiple times in confusion.

"I should go," she said simply, not giving him any further explanation because she just couldn't understand what exactly was his problem. Why on Earth she should stay?

Her train of thoughts got interrupted as a heavy weight suddenly pressed against her body. The guy was partly on top of hers, swearing a little when he wasn't able to open the handcuffs right away.

In this position, she got a perfect, detailed view on his muscular shoulders and his broad chest.

She looked up a bit, examining his jaw and the features of his face from this angle while he released her. He didn't pull away from her right away, and she didn't mind that fact one bit. She just struggled slightly when wanting to rub soothingly the wrist of her right hand.

"You are all free to leave now," he flashed her a smile as he looked down at her. Firstly, he had caressed her cheek before he replaced her thumb on her wrist with his own. To her own surprise, the wrist didn't hurt much. She just had to deal with the terrible feeling in her arm that inevitably came after a body part was stuck in a position for way too long. Still, his touch was super gentle and caring as if he was scared of possibly hurting her.

"But I would be very happy if you wouldn't." This confession came out in a hushed voice.

There was a tiny, hopeful smile playing on his rosy lips. The dedication to leave started wavering now.

"Why should I stay?"

He took a moment to think about it, but in the end, he came to the conclusion that actions would be more convincing than words.

Slowly, he dipped his head down towards the crook of her neck, giving her a chance to pull away or maybe force him off. She didn't do either of those things. The only thing she did was letting her eyes fall close while he kissed on her skin. The kisses were light and gentle, they almost tickled her at first. Then, she felt his tongue and just like that the whole situation started to feel way more sensual. Her fingers tangled in his curls and when she tugged on it, his teeth sank into the flesh slightly as a form of revenge. He got the blanket off her body, baring her front in front of him. His hand roamed over her breasts before heading lower. At that point, her chest was already raising heavily, and she moaned out quietly when his tongue flicked over her nipple. She was more than happy to have his thigh pressing against her core but it felt even better when his fingers moved down, rubbing over her pussy and then slid in.

She was not the only one to make a sound at that. It would be a lie to tell that feeling all the wetness and then the warmth and softness of her walls when he entered her. His cock had already started hardening earlier but now she could really feel it press against her leg. She shifted a little, making him groan with the fiction against his cock. He couldn't wait to fuck her properly, thrust his cock inside her. It would be a shame not to make her cum this way as well.

The soft whimpers she was letting out, asking him in that sweet desperate voice to add another finger was definitely not something he was going to pass on. His teeth grazed against her nipple, making her arch her back slightly, while she hissed out. He curled his fingers inside her.

"Keep going. Don't you fucking dare to stop."

He smirked a little and just when the pitch of her voice turned higher, he stopped.

The expression on her face was priceless. It went all the way from anger, confusion to a big disappointment within just a few seconds.

She stared at him in disbelief. Her mouth gaping open.

"You did not just do that."

"Seems like I did," he said with a grin.

She rolled her eyes and began pushing him away from her.

"Wait. Wait."His hand stopped her from getting up from the bed, and he planted a small kiss to her stomach as an apology.

"I am sorry," he hummed out against her skin and looked up at her. In all honesty, she doubted she could leave just like that when her insides were burning with so much excitement. A nice proof of that were the juices that were now all over the insides of her thighs. Thanks to how he had tried to soothe her by stroking the delicate skin. His lips caressed her stomach and her hips. The touches were soft and light, even when they reached her mound and this gentle treatment sent the most pleasurable kind of shivers down her spine. As his lips got closer to her clit, his hand began to wander up her thigh.

She buckled her hips once she got his tongue flicking against her clit and she felt his fingers enter her. Her walls immediately tightened against him, and he couldn't help but groan in the reaction to how her amazing body invited him. It sent out vibrations towards her core, making the tingling sensation in her middle even stronger.

Another groan erupted from his throat when he looked up and saw her grasping her wonderful tits. She twitched under him once more while cursing in the hottest voice he has probably ever heard. He wouldn't dare to take the orgasm away from her again, but she better kept the information to herself anyway. She may not have said those words aloud this time, but the way her body wriggled and her moans sounded, he was pretty sure that it would come soon anyway.

The closer to cumming she was, the more eagerly he was eating her out, not daring to allow a single drop of her juices come to spare. He didn't budge when her fingers tucked on his hair as she had tried to pull him even closer to her.

Her thighs continued to shake beside his head after she had already released his hair from her grasp. When he looked up, he saw her chest raising heavily while she tried catching her breath, muttering something about how that makes up for him acting like a jerk earlier. He chuckled at that.

"Glad to hear that," he said, while he was moving to lay down beside her. "You couldn't possibly think that I would really leave you here hanging," he continued disbelievingly.

Her shoulders shrugged as she keenly watched him up and down, stopping at the sight of his cock that was rock hard by now. When their eyes met again, it was Luke's turn to shrug. Who could blame him for this, after what had just gone down? The answer was no one. His eyes closed blissfully for a second when her hand wrapped around his shaft practically out of nowhere. Her thumb stroked over the glistening tip, which made him curse. His mind immediately went to how amazing it felt when she stroked him while the head was in her sweet mouth, and she did THAT thing with her tongue. He needed to stop with this immediately though, not wanting to burst just like that without having more fun first. He could always jerk himself off at these memories later.

She set this to end before he said anything, simply getting out of the bed without uttering a single word.

"Join me in the shower?" She suggested, smirking a little.

He nodded his head rather enthusiastically and then watched her beautiful ass move away from him as she headed into the bathroom.

When he was getting up himself, he didn't forget to grab a condom from his bedside table and also grabbing the tissues from last night, so he could throw them away.

When he entered the bathroom, she already had the water running and was standing right under the stream. She had heard him enter, but she still gave him the joy of acting surprised when his hand playfully spanked her ass. She shot him a look over her shoulder before turning around to face him. Getting a good look of him again and seeing that pretty face of his and everything that came with it, she struggled a little with wrapping her mind around the fact that she had actually gotten so lucky to leave with him last night. She pulled him closer to her, and her hand ran over his back and ass, scratching the skin slightly, while she kissed his neck and jaw. He was craving her so bad but all he had to make himself content with for now was her body pressing against his. It was the best torture one could wish for and he was definitely not going to complain.

She seemed to be enjoying the distressed state he was in when he later had to watch her wash her body. He called her a fucking tease, and she didn't even protest. She just tossed the shower gel over to him with a grin. His cock was almost aching by the point when they were done and she couldn't say she was surprised when he made her take a step back. While he held her hips, she trailed her hands over his chest, smiling up at him. The exact smile stayed on when she dropped her hand down to touch his cock. He would do anything for her in that moment. He had been waiting so long... Pulling away from her, so he could grab the condom was therefore almost an impossible task for him. He pushed through though and when she put the condom on for him, moving her hand to cup and stroke his balls after, he knew that the few seconds they had spent separated were definitely worth it.

She felt his hand move up her thigh before he made her lift her leg up. Then his cock finally came to a proper contact with her pussy this morning. When his eager hand started to trace her other side as well, and his fingers dug into the soft flesh of her ass, she was pretty sure that she knew where he was going with this. She locked her arms around his neck, helping him as he lifted her up. Soon, her legs were securely placed around his waist and he was guiding his cock with one hand towards her entrance.

 The sound he made right next to her ear when he finally pushed forward made her sigh out. She squeezed his shoulder for more support when he started to rock his hips, thrusting in and out of her. She had her face buried in the crook of his neck at first, but as the time went she started passionately kiss her way up to his jaw. It was only for a second that she had to pull away for a bit to catch a breath. He looked longingly at her then and lowered his head a bit to meet her face, kissing her.

All their moans and groans were muffled by the lips of the other person. He was holding onto her ass and thighs with a very strong grip, ensuring she wouldn't fall. If it was painful, she didn't complain, and he didn't bother himself with thinking this through any further. If he learnt anything last night, it would be that she definitely didn't have a problem with telling him what she wants from him. As the thought appeared on his mind, he slowly began to set her down. Their lips were the last part separated and he tenderly stroked her hips gently before he made her turn around. He noticed the faint smile that appeared on her face as he did that.

It was a pleasant surprise to see that remembered how much she enjoyed when he took her from the back before, she didn't expect him to do that. He doubted he would ever forget it, though. Her voice was still as clear in his mind as it was before when she had asked him to fuck her from the back. Just the thought of it made his cock twitch. He had to smile when he watched her move her body, trying to make access from him easier.

"I would find a way to make it work, don't worry," he muttered, his lips brushing against her shoulder.

She didn't get to say anything to that since a soft moan made its way past her lips first. It was a shame he couldn't see her face now. The sounds she was making and that were echoing through the bathroom right now definitely made up for it. It had slipped his attention that she had brought her hand down to touch herself. After all, it was a bit difficult to notice this, considering the position they were in. He had been holding himself back for a while already but when she turned so fucking tight around him when her orgasm arrived, he simply couldn't anymore.

They stayed still for a moment, both of them needing a second to compose themselves before they pulled away and took yet another shower.

"I am sorry about these," she said sincerely when she watched him search for some fresh clothes and noticed the marks on his back and shoulders.

He simply waved it off amusedly before slipping into a pair of boxers.

"You want me to get you some tea or coffee?" He wondered. His friends were going coming in less than two hours but he wasn't a dick who would just kick her out once he got his balls emptied in the morning.

She hesitated for a while. Usually, she would already be long gone.

"Sure." The answer surprised her more than him.

He left the room to prepare the drinks for them, while she continued getting dressed. Her bra had disappeared God knew where, but she could deal without it, she supposed.

She joined him in the kitchen a bit later, smiling at him as she took the cup.

"Is this a bad timing to ask your name?" She peeped out. "I am so sorry. I know you said it to me, but... I am not very good with names in general and combined with the drinks... I tried to remember the whole morning..."

He let out a heartfelt laugh before he held his hand out.

"I am Luke."

[january3693]

Someone We Used to Know - Part 25

(This is a Marauders Era AU about what might have changed if Sirius was expelled after the Prank. Here’s the Master List if you’d like to start from the beginning or find a specific part)

Remus Lupin has always wanted to be liked.

 It’s one of his many secrets.

 Compared to the rest of his secrets this one probably seems small, almost silly. It’s not though.

 This desire to be liked by others is rooted deep inside of Remus. So much of his past and his personality have been filtered through it. There are so many things he’s done—or hasn’t done—because he wanted to be included. To be wanted. To be loved—in every definition of the word.

 Most people who know him, even those who know him well, would probably classify Remus as an introvert, someone who prefers solitude or the company of a few chosen friends over large groups or parties. They’re wrong. At his core, Remus is secretly an extrovert. He loves other people. Talking with them, being with them, laughing with them; it energizes him.

 It also terrifies him.

 That inner extrovert is wrapped in layers upon layers of anxiety and self-esteem issues, all tied together with a bow and a tag reading “Lycanthropy.”

 For all that he wants to be liked, to be loved, Remus has always been terrified of letting people get close enough to know him well enough to love him.

 Still, it peeks through, in the deep attachments Remus has to the few friends who know all his other secrets, and in the soft, scholarly persona he’s cultivated. That persona is carefully crafted to tell everyone he meets “I’m not scary, I’m safe and friendly and would never think of ripping your throat out.”

 It’s a mixture of this lifelong desire to be liked and five years of internalized guilt that bring Remus back to Sirius’s hotel the next day. He doesn’t want to leave things the way he did yesterday, following meekly after James when he’d stormed out.

 He doesn’t tell James or Peter what he’s planning to do. In part because James probably wouldn’t approve, but mostly because he’s not actually sure what he’s planning to do.

 He makes it to the hotel—well, across the street from the hotel—then he stops. He doesn’t want to walk into that beautiful lobby again and ask someone to call up to Sirius’s room using that fake name of his.

 He also doesn’t want to leave.

 So, he compromises in a rather daring way—he was a Gryffindor, after all.

 Remus walks into an empty alley and apparates directly up to the balcony of Sirius’s hotel room.

 The balcony door is all glass, and through it he can see Sirius, his back turned to Remus as he fusses with a cufflink. He wonders if he should knock or say something. Which will startle Sirius less when he turns to find someone standing unexpectedly on his sixth floor balcony?

 In the end, he knocks.

 Remus startles just as much though, because when Sirius whirls around he’s holding an enormous knife in front of him.

 Instinctively, he takes a step back, knocking against the railing, which is thankfully tall enough that he doesn’t go tumbling over backward. He also grabs for his wand, but doesn’t pull it out, because just as quickly, Sirius lowers the knife.

 “Remus?” Sirius asks. “What are you doing?”

 Remus steadies himself and grimaces. “Er, hi…just…er…”

 Sirius sets his ridiculously large knife aside and hurries to unlock the balcony door. He still looks alarmed…and apprehensive. Unlike everyone living in Wizarding Britain though, he doesn’t ask Remus a security question, which is good considering how old all of their shared memories are.

 “Hi,” Remus winds up saying awkwardly as he steps inside.

 “Hi,” Sirius replies, just as awkwardly. “I, um, didn’t expect to see you again…any of you…”

 “Yeah, sorry about that…about James,” Remus says, “and about leaving like that with him.”

 They hadn’t even said goodbye, not really. Not in a nice way.

 Sirius shrugs. “It’s fine. I don’t blame him for being angry. I don’t blame any of you.” He turns away though and busies himself with a briefcase lying open on the unmade bed, gathering papers into an open file and stashing it away before shutting the briefcase with a click.

 “Still, I’m sorry,” Remus says.

 What he doesn’t say is that on some level he understands what Sirius did. If he’d been the one expelled from school, Remus would have run away too. Not for the same reasons as Sirius, but he wouldn’t have been able to stay, to be a burden on his already overburdened parents or an embarrassment to his friends.

 Things probably would have been terrible for Sirius if he’d stayed, just like he’d said yesterday. Wizarding Britain hadn’t been kind to Remus, and it probably would have been even crueler to Sirius, the fallen, broken scion of a dark and powerful family. There would have been no escape in anonymity for him like there has been for Remus.

 That probably hadn’t occurred to James though. For all that he and Sirius had once been metaphorically joined at the hip, they had also been very different in many ways.

 Remus—who has always wanted to be liked, to be loved, and who has always been so afraid that no one would ever like him, let alone love him—is far more willing to forgive Sirius, even if a part of him agrees with some of what James said.

 “That’s a…very large knife,” Remus says, because he’s still struggling to put together what he really wants to say.

 Sirius chuckles and leaves his briefcase to go pick the knife back up. “Goblin-made,” he says and offers it hilt first to Remus, who takes it gingerly. “I won it from this old warlock in a card game last year.”

 It’s not adorned with gold or jewels, but the quality seems remarkable, based on the next to nothing Remus knows about knives, goblin-made or otherwise. “It’s lovely,” he says anyway. “Do you often…carry a large knife around?”

 Sirius’s lips twitch into a smile. “Sometimes, mostly when I think I might have to deal with hostile wizards. It’s amazing how few wizards ever expect someone to be armed with anything other than a wand.”

 Remus sets the knife down hastily.

 “Don’t worry, I haven’t actually stabbed anyone,” Sirius says. Then, with a cheeky grin that drags Remus straight back to Hogwarts, Sirius adds, “Not with that knife anyway.”

 Remus lets himself get caught in that grin of Sirius’s and smiles.

 “It’s not that I’m not happy you decided to come back, Remus, but I have a meeting to get to,” Sirius says. He tucks the knife somewhere up his sleeve, which seems like it should be impossible, but, well, they are magical.

 “Right, you have something to do with art and the museum?” Remus says, trying to recall what Sirius said about his work yesterday.

 Sirius smiles and nods, but Remus thinks he sees a flicker of something he might once have recognized pass through those grey eyes. “Yeah,” Sirius says. “There’s a painting I need to acquire, and first I have to find out if it was damaged in the attack at all.”

 “Right,” Remus says again. It’s not all right though. There’s still so much he needs to say to Sirius. “Can we…meet up again though? Maybe talk some more?”

 For a moment, Sirius looks conflicted, almost frightened, but he nods and forces a smile.

 “Yeah, sure, that would be great,” Sirius says. He turns away, looking for something, which turns out to be a pen and a little pad of hotel branded paper. He scribbles down something and hands it to Remus. It turns out to be an address. “Dinner?” Sirius asks. “Tonight?”

 Dinner. Tonight. With Sirius.

 “Yeah, sounds great.”

(Part 26)

[loki-fanfic-whore]

Venomous Curse ch. 2

Loki x female

Warnings: sexual situations, language, abuse, noncon adult situations.

Chapter 2 Remorse

Alice's eyes flitted open, she was laying in her bed after what had felt like the deepest most peaceful slept she had ever had. Maybe it was due to the fact Conner didn't burst in. Maybe exhaustion just got the better of her.

She got up, showered and dressed for school. Her face swelling was going down and her eye was now turning to shades green and yellow, a sign of healing.

She couldn't really remember yesterday evening. How she got home or what happened. She remembered sitting in the park...and seeing...

"Professor Laufeyson!" She spoke aloud. Her heart beat sped up as she felt her core burn. What in gods name was happening to her? Why did she feel turned on all of the sudden?

She grabbed her back pack and decided to walk to school. The sun hadn't peaked yet and the calm darkness comforted her. She walked at a brisk pace but still enjoyed the silence, before she would have to face everyone for another day of torture.

She got to the school a few minutes early and slipped into the library. It only had a few students in the corner playing some card game. She went to the back and picked up a book on the history of England in the Tudor era, which was one of her favorites. Sitting on an over sized bean bag she began leafing through the pages when the door burst open to the library and a shrill sound assulated everyone's ears.

"Where are you you little fucking slut?!" Selenas voice carried to every corner of the library. Alice kept quiet ignoring it and continued to read. Her heart sank in her chest as she knew she wouldnt be able to escape. Her hands were becoming sweaty at the adrenaline rising in her system.

Selena peaked around a corner then sneered.

"I found you fucking cunt." She marched up to Alice and grabbed her by the nape of her sweater dragging her off the beanbag chair. Alice simply froze, as the triggers led to tears. Selena slapped her across the face causing a small yelp to escape.

"How dare you touch Conner in any way! You stupid bitch!" She roared angrily as she continued to hit her. After the third or fourth hard contact to her head, slice felt herself becoming concussed. Everything going hazy.

"What is the meaning of this?! Miss. Ramos let her go and go see the principle! Miss. Lovelace come with me." A deep voice filled the air causing Selena to drop her. Alice crumpled into a ball on the library floor.

"Miss. Lovelace? Can you hear me?" His voice was fuzzy and going in and out. Alice moaned gently and rolled onto her side. The lights were so bright.

"Miss. Lovelace I am going to pick you up and take you to the nurse. I think you may be concussed. Do I have your permission?" He made sure to say it loud enough for the other students present to hear.

Placing his arms around her he carried her bridal style out of the library and into the nurses station.

"Abigail...I need help." He called out laying her body down.

"Alice? Stay awake please. You can't fall asleep." His hand gently held her cheek.

"Loki? What happened." A thin old woman in a white coat came in.

"Abigail there you are. She was attacked by another student. I think she is concussed. Abby- she is my new blood." Loki mentioned the last sentence in a low hushed tone. The older woman's blonde eyebrows raised in suprise.

"Loki- how long has it been since your last?" She asked as she looked to the poor beaten girl on the table.

"Its been...decades....but that's not important...our bond has just begun, but I believe I can help her."

"Yes yes.... I'll lock the room. Just call the desk phone when you are done." She turned and left without another word. Loki sighed gratefully and closed the door locking it. He moved to the table and leaned over Alice checking to see if she was still conscious.

"Alice? I need to make you better. I- I can help you, but its unconventional...I need to touch your body...do you give me consent?" He spoke gently and his minty breath fanned her face. She had a throbbing headache and opened her eyes a crack to process his words. After a few moments of silence she groaned gently

"Do what you need to." She laid on the table as Loki took his jacket off revealing a pressed button up shirt and black slacks. He rolled his shirt up to his elbows and then gently sat her up removing her sweater. He unbuttoned her shirt and slid it down her arms revealing her chest to him. He could see the bite he had left the night before that was almost healed. He also could see countless bruises and cuts. He gently took her neck and waist in his hands as he kissed at her throat.

"I am going to bite you Alice...itll sting, but I promise it will become much more enjoyable soon." He let his dual fangs extend and sunk them into the crook of her neck, she let out a soft whimper as he began to drink. Jesus christ the feeling she gave him was euphoric. He could feel his cock twitch in his pants painfully erect from her scent and taste.

He only drank a little, just enough to strengthen the bond. He then gently bit his palm and placed it to her mouth. His other hand still holding her up gently grasping the back of her neck.

"Drink Alice...we need to complete the bond today" he spoke softly. Alice opened her mouth and licked at his palm. She could taste his bitter blood and wrinkled her nose. She drank only a few drops before it was too much. She felt herself growing increasingly turned on.

"L-Loki I dont feel any better." She slurred out.

"Darling...I need to be intimate with you in order to finish this process and heal you...do I have your permission?" He spoke in a hushed husky tone in her ear. He knew she was aroused. He could feel her heart beat picking up. When they were complete in bonding he would feel every emotion she had and she would feel his.. it was what made the bond special. She would be his forever. The over powering scent of her arousal caused him to groan and try to readjust himself.

"Do I have your permission?" He asked again not trying to push.

"Y-yes." She spoke breathlessly. Loki immediately freed himself from his trousers and pulled her underwear to the side exposing her sweetness to him. He sank into her to the hilt sucking in air as he became overwhelmed with emotions. The bond was completed. Alice moaned out as she felt herself changing. She was becoming more clear headed. The concussion slipping away. She looked down to see Loki biting his lip his cock buried fully in her.

"Alice...now that you are level headed and the bond complete....I need to ask again. Are you okay with this? Or would you prefer me to stop?" Tears slid down her cheeks as she began to tremble.

"I-I" she hiccuped. Lokis face turned to one of anguish.

"Shhh it's okay. I'll stop my darling....we need to talk and now is probably the best time." He gently slipped out of her and groaned internally. His cock was a light purple from lack of release. He pushed it back into his pants and handed her back her sweater.

"What are you?" Alice was the first to break the silence. As she buttoned her shirt and pulled her sweater back on over her head.

"Uh...I am called many things...I believe the most recent name is a succubus. I get energy from extracting it through...different means from others."

"And this bond?" She asked again breaking the silence.

"Uh..well contrary to most beliefs, succubi do not enjoy sleeping with everyone....we bond to a certain person who calls to us. And we are bonded for life...I can...feel your emotions and you can feel mine...the bond becomes stronger with every time we mate or whenever you allow me to feed..." he chose his words carefully staring at her with his arms crossed.

"And I am now bonded to you? What if I dont want to be?" She asked her eyes flicking up to meet his.

"Well...it would break my heart...being rejected within a bond can cause many negative effects, but ultimately it leads to death of one or both bonded individuals." He didn't hide the hurt in his eyes. She felt a slight pang in her chest. It must have been from him, it was such a strange sensation to be the cause of sadness within yourself.

"Professor-"

"Please, when we are alone call me Loki..."

"Loki- I don't know if this is what I want...I- have a lot going on with Conner and school and-and I dont even know you!" She gushed forward as she stared right into his green eyes.

"I am aware it is overwhelming Alice, but now, with this bond I can protect you...keep you safe..we dont have to be intimate if you wish not to be...I- I can see some of your memories and I understand completely." His voice was soothing but she wrapped her arms around her middle trying to hide the trembling.

"You-youve seen my memories? You have watched my life like an open book before you and I dont even know you.." she was becoming increasingly upset.

Loki sighed and ran a hand through his hair. This is not how he wanted this to go.

"Alice please, we dont have to do anything you aren't comfortable with until you are fully ready....but this bond...it doesnt go away...it will only make you sick if you fight it...I will tell you anything you want to know. I will woo you and we can even go on dates if you prefer all until you are comfortable with me...I didn't mean to be intrusive...the bonding just shows me a great deal about who I bond with...I was hurt and you were wanting and willing to help." he looked to her with semi-pleading eyes. She could feel the tightness in her chest.

"You are my professor! I am your student! What will others say?" She was incredibly opposed to this bond, but she could literally feel the hurt of trying to reject him.

"You are almost done with school." He countered before moving from the counter to stand infront of her.

"Alice...I'm so sorry if you didn't want this, but it's too late now..." he spoke softly before cupping her cheek. She flinched to his touch and he immediately took a step back.

"I'm sorry Professor Laufeyson...I need to go. I've missed class." She stood up and quickly moved past him unlocking the door and bolting out. Loki stood in the doorway horrified at how he had just scared her off. Abigail stood and moved beside him.

"Young man...you know how wounded she is...she will come around, but you must go at her pace. She is scared of being hit not caressed. Of being raped not loved..."

Loki sighed and ran both hands through his hair.

"I'll need to help her see her self worth."

[itbethatwaysometime]

Uncharted Chapter Six

Warnings：Some light swearing， fluff

Word Count： 2.4k 

A/n: Hello! This is probably one of my favourite chapters to write. I really enjoyed it and hope you do too. Tear in my Heart is coming tomorrow! 

 Unknown Location 

Hydra Operation 11:03 PM

“I have a simple way of tracking the Asset, ma’am.” A low grade Hydra agent stood on one knee, head bowed down in front of the ruler of the most dangerous worldwide subversive organization.

“Keep going.” She says.

“All we need is time,” she’s clearly about to dismiss him with the flick of her wrist,” Wait! Please… All we need is time because Captain America will find him soon enough. What we need to do is follow the Captain. Once they find each other, they won’t leave neither of each others sides.” He blurts out, hoping desperately that his idea was enough to prove him worthy of a future.

She pauses, then nods her head. She flicks her wrist, disposing of the agent, leaving her to her thoughts.

At last, the Asset in our grasps.

———————

2 months later

“Stevie, could you hand me the maple syrup?” You open up a portal for him to pass it through. “Thanks.”

“Hey guys.” Says Bruce, the last one to walk in.

Today was a day like any other. Except,  since that fateful night in your apartment, every day has been a sort of unbelievable daydream. Mornings have been spent with the entire team in your kitchen. Tony, Thor and Steve had been permanent fixtures in your living area since the beginning. They seemed to enjoy spending time with you and became fond of your space.  Sam just showed up with Steve one morning accompanying him through his daily routine. After hearing all the commotion, Wanda and Pietro wandered into your quarters.Then followed Clint, who you constantly scolded for entering through the vents, Tasha and Bruce, who mostly kept to themselves. And, lastly, Vision. You weren’t surprised, the guy didn’t actually need to eat.

You’ve only been here a short while but everyone’s already treating you like family. You were incredibly grateful and it showed through your kind words and especially your actions. The team couldn’t have chosen a better candidate. Plus, you’ve never been happier.

In the past two months, you’ve made more joyful memories than you had made in a year. This group of crazy, strong, super-serumed, nutty people appreciated your presence. It’s a wonderful feeling. Trust.

Like the first time Tony saw just how smart you were.

—— (Flashback)

“Look, all I’m saying is, Mach 78 or whatever wouldn’t be shutting down prematurely if you’d just use multiple power sources throughout the suit; each one would independently fuel different aspects of the suit, therefore, you’d use less power, have a longer lasting suit, and if ever one goes down, you’d be fine. Because you’d have the multiple other ones supporting. I’ve already done all the calculations and if the core is not even 5% vibranium it’ll withstand practically anything.” You state matter of factly,” And, theoretically, if you aren’t too reckless, place the power sources strategically laced through the mechanics, nothing’s going to get damaged enough to be powered down.”

Tony stares at you for a beat, then slowly gets up and takes a few steps around the table.”

“GOD, you’re great! Why don’t I pay you?”

“You wouldn’t be able to afford me.” You sass back with a big grin on your face.

——

Or the time you woke up because Steve was having a nightmare.

His scream made the hair on your neck rise and goosebumps appear on your arms. A wrecked shout pierced through the quiet night.

“God, please, PLEASE BUCK, no, NO!”

You immediately sprint towards Steve’s room, commanding F.R.I.D.A.Y to unlock the doors.

You arrive in his bedroom panting, your eyes softening sadly at the sight before you. Steve was twisted in the sheets, his fist gripping the white linen so tightly his knuckles were going white. He was pale and sweating, tears running down his face mumbling incoherently. Your heart clenched as you slowly approached a broken man right in the middle of the throws of a nightmare.

Knowing that touching a person who’s having a nightmare is a terrible idea, you start by asking the AI to up the lights to 30%. Once on, Steve seemed to flinch a little, but stayed unconscious.

You opted for your voice.

“Steve,” you gently sat down next to his tense form,” Steve, it’s ok” That’s when his hand lets go of the sheets and turns to grip your wrists painfully hard. You hiss, but settle for getting him to wake up first. That’s when he starts shaking. To the point where you knew that if you didn’t wake him up now, he’s going to get himself hurt.

You leap up, straddling him and get ahold of his shoulders shaking him gently.

“Steve, wake up, it’s just me, wake up Steve.”

He suddenly jumps up, eyes wide open and alert scanning the room for intruders. His muscles tense, then relax when he lays his eyes on you.

“Hey, hey, just breathe alright?,” He looked so, so broken. You move up the bed and kneel before him, delicately putting one hand on his shoulder and dragging him into a very well-deserved hug. Your hand snakes up into his hair and you let him cry over your shoulder. Explaining that he relived watching Buck die again and again and again. He gripped you tightly as you soothed him, gently caressing his back, whispering I’m here, breathe, you’re okay.

At some point he shifted and you wondered whether you should leave. But, he held onto you pleadingly and snuggled you tightly to his chest finally letting himself rest.

You listened to his even breathing and watched him sleep dreamlessly before drifting off yourself.

Since then, you’d been closer to him. He was like a brother to you. He felt the same way.

——

But you didn’t only hang around Steve and Tony. You loved talking to Wanda and Tasha. You thought Pietro was really funny.

He liked you even more after you fixed his favourite shirt that was ripped in half because Clint thought it would be funny to test how close his arrows could get to a target without actually harming anything.

In short, you were having lots of fun and you blended seamlessly into a family of super heroes.

——

After a chaotic breakfast, you went to train. Your skills were even more refined and the team work came easily for you.When you had free time you switched between hanging out in the common room and Tony’s lab.

“Hey, could you pass me the—“ You mindlessly hand him the fourth steel ring made to seal the right wrist propulsor.

“Ya, also the blue prints for—“ You swipe a manila folder across the desk as you scroll through your Instagram.

Ten minutes later, both of you are working in a comfortable silence.

“SHit, I forgot my —“ You shove a hand in your pocket giving him the phone he left in your apartment after breakfast. You miss the look of awe he throws at you, you also miss the amused smile on Bruce’s face as he watches the whole exchange.

You sigh, screwing in the final bolt to your little project and start decluttering your desk. You head downstairs quick quick to grab something to drink knowing that Tony would want another one any minute now. He doesn’t notice you leave, too engrossed in upgrading his beloved suit. You didn’t mind, you found it quite sweet, him being so completely occupied by something.

You come back to the lab hearing him say the exact words you predicted him to say the moment you get back.

“(Y/n), would you mind getting me a —“ You gently place his steaming cup of coffee into his already open hand.

“Am I that predictable?”

“Only to me Stark, only to me.” You smile at him smugly. He on the other hand couldn’t help but wonder how he got so lucky. To have a young smart, kind, woman keep him in check. He’d spent countless sleepless nights thinking about what you meant to him. He came to the conclusion that you seemed to fit right in in as a sort of daughter figure and an incredibly awesome assistant. He’d do anything for you, yet he couldn’t figure out whether that was a good thing or a bad thing.

——— Later on in the day

Agent (Y/n), please meet Tony in Conference Room B.” F.R.I.D.A.Y says over the comms. You look around at the rest of the team, but they all shrug not knowing why he’d call for you, not even in his lab, in Conference Room B.

You knock on the frosted glass door waiting for a response, you hear a muted Come in, and enter.

He stood there in an overly expensive suit and sunglasses in front of a metal suitcase. It looks like a scene from every 50’s mobster movie.

“Uh, what’s in the box?” You heard him giggle at the movie reference.

“You do realize I’m way more attractive than Brad Pitt.” He sasses back.

“Alright alright, handsome. Seriously, what’s in the case?” This whole situation seems ominous, but Tony looks like an overexcited puppy.

“Have you spoken to Cap today? “ He crosses his arms.

“No, he’s busy, what does that have to do with anything?” You stare at him confused. That last time you saw him was yesterday night, but that happens all time. He takes midnight strolls that last two days. Or sometimes its a mission, personal or handed out by Fury.

“Ah, that makes sense.” He sighs walking around to the front of the metal box.

“Tony, what makes sense?” You’re starting to get really annoyed by his act.

“Why he wanted me to make you a suit.”

Silence

“What? Why would he want me to- Wait a second. He thinks I’m ready?” He nods excitedly.

“Yep,” he says popping the p,” there’s a pretty big extraction happening, but we’re going to be briefed by Fury in about,” he looks down at his watch, “give or take ten minutes.”

“Yes!” You squeal in delight. “Um, I mean this is great.” You clear your throat trying to remain professional.

He smiles at you knowingly before gesturing towards the case. “Go on.”

You walk unsteadily towards the edge of the table and run a shaky hand around the exterior. The outside of the case is a platinum silver with ridges all throughout, you run shaky hands around the edges bracing yourself for what was inside.

Your fingers find the two clips at either end of the box and open the latch. The lid pops open with an audible click and lifts up slowly .

You gasp.

“Tony it’s beautiful.”

The first part was a suit much like Natasha’s. A stretchy, but incredibly strong fabric that was probably a thinned out version of Kevlar that worked just as well. The sheen resembled leather and the texture was soft. The pants held numerous belt loops and straps for extra weapon ‘storage’. A large belt circled your waist with a sturdy steel clasp. The top was the same material as the leggings with a very sturdy zip that went down the middle.

That was awesome. But, what really caught your eye was the overcoat he had provided. It was truly, truly in honour just to be wearing it. It could’ve been mistaken for a long trench-coat except the inside was lined with the same Kevlar like material and pockets for gadgets. The lapels near your ears held incredibly lightweight Stark technology and the gloves that came with were slip-resistant. They were lightweight and protective.

Not to mention the colour. Now, if this was any other article of clothing you wouldn’t really have cared about something as trivial as the colour. Except, the coat was purple. Not any type of purple, but the exact shade of purple that surrounded your portals whenever you opened one. The type of purple that glowed iridescently in the moonlight and the type of purple you’ve grown accustomed too.Tony had payed attention to that specific detail and it made your heart burst.

“Thank you.” You say, at loss for words. You wrap your arms around his neck for a hug. At first he’s surprised, but quickly gets that message and relaxes into your embrace.

“Ok, kid?,” you nod,” because Fury’s going to call us in for a meeting in 3… 2… 1…”

Avengers, please present yourself to Conference Room A, Nick Fury is waiting, F.R.I.D.A.Y announces

You laugh out loud at his impeccable timing. You follow him out of the room and into the one adjacent.

Other than Fury and Steve, you two were the first to arrive.

“Hey Fury, Capsicle.” He nods semi-respectfully at both.

You smile politely at Fury, not exactly sure how to act around your superior. You turn to Cap and give him a warm smile, one that he returns immediately with a whispered Hey Sweetie.

You spend a couple of minutes in companionable silence before the rest of the group of grown-up children file into the room.

Once everyone was settled down around the table, the Director began to speak.

“We have found the location of the Winter Soldier, and numerous of his files are in the database of this particular Hydra base. We suspect that Barnes is in the vicinity of this base to recollect his files. We’re planning on an extraction of the Soldier and the files.”

The atmosphere in the room went from playful to tense real fast. From what you’ve heard, Barnes was Steve’s best friend and that Hydra messed with his head real good. You couldn’t blame him for wanting to run. Fury quickly explains the rundown of the operation, not dwelling on too many details.

“Cap, you’re obviously on Barnes duty and I want someone with you on back up,” Steve’s about to retort,”no but’s, he’s unstable, you’ll need it.”

“And for the rest of you, here’s the game plan,” He points at a stack of files to his right,” we leave tomorrow at the crack of dawn.”

The team starts crowding around the files trying to get their fill on the mission. But, before you get a hold on a manila file, a large hand grabs a hold of your forearm and pulls you out of the room.

“Steve— what are you— I didn’t get a-“ you stare at him confused, he has a determined look on his face with his brow furrowed in worry.

“You’re coming with me for back up on Buck.”

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[digressfromreality]

Sometimes, We Survive By Forgetting

Synopsis: “You can erase someone from your mind. Getting them out of your heart is another story,“ Deidra whispered to her newest friend. A stray black dog she found, that had hurt himself outside of her home. What Deidra didn’t know that the stray dog, was her brother-in-law, Sirius Black, who was very surprised to find his brother’s wife very much alive after all these years.

Warning: SMUT, abuse/torture                        Part 3 of ….

(Past: August 1995)

Sirius stood opposite of Albus and her. It was all too much to have her in his childhood home. Half of Sirius expected Regulus to trudge through the door and berate him for being around his girlfriend. He shook his head, this was his brother's wife, they weren't teenagers anymore and Regulus was long gone. Gone how, Albus was trying to see if his could unlock that answer.

Deidra sniffled. It was rather unbecoming of her to be in state of emotional distress in front of others. She nodded for Dumbledore to continue, he had given her a mild pain sedative and a truth potion to help the theoretical process move much quicker. The dull ache was burning the in the back of her mind as he continued.

This Sirius fellow had been oddly right about the miserable house elf. He seemed to wait on her every whim, speaking praises of her, well her former self. Yes, Mistress Black. Your favorite scones Mistress. Mistress will restore the Noble House of Black. He even got choked up bringing up Regulus, but that is when Sirius had barked at the house elf to leave. The subject she noted, was a touchy one. She waited until she was stuffed into a room that her 'brother in law' decreed as hers previously.

"Kreacher?" Called out, wondering if the little creature would appear.

A loud POP, and a bow, the little thing appeared. "Yes, Mistress?" Deidra wondered whether she should correct the elf but she concluded that pleasantries were needed for this conversation.

"I don't know how privy you are to my reasons for staying here, but I was wondering if I could ask you something?" She was holding her knees, unsure of how lax she should sit. Was it safe to be unguarded?

"Kreacher heard, Kreacher hears many things while serving the house of Black."

"So, you know about why I can't remember?" The miserable elf fiddled with his torn garb. "Kreacher if you know something, please tell me."

"Kreacher was there when Master Regulus took Mistress's memories." The elf admitted. Tears piqued at the corner of her eyes, daring to fall. She felt the elf tug on her free hand, she gave him a smile watery smile accepting the handkerchief from him. "Kreacher does not want Mistress to cry. The house of Black does not show weakness." She quietly nodded. Her mind was racing, she had a million and one questions to ask. Where to start? Could she start? Would he answer everything she asked?

"Kreacher what happened?"

"Kreacher must not tell, Master Regulus ordered him so. Never speak of this, never, to no one." So that answered some of her questions right away. This elf was loyal to Regulus and won't talk about things he told him not to.

"Okay, well are there other things you can tell me about your master?" She watched the elf's eyes nearly double in size, she could almost swear she could see excitement flash across his small body.

"Yes mistress."

"Well at least your short-term memory is intact. Yesterday's events were clear in your mind. But that is as far as I can allow today." Deidra was a bit dejected about the progress. Dumbledore had said that he would help her gain her memories back and introduce her to her family. Neither of which he had really done just yet. He patted her hands, giving her an encouraging smile. "Sirius could you show her back to her room, I think she needs to rest now."

"Now, I'm her bloody butler." He mumbled under his breath. He pulled at her arm, "This way princess."

------------------------------------

(Current timeline: March 1996)

"Don't do this Regulus, please." She was gripping his hands so tightly that it hurt her, she was desperate to get him to abandon this mission of his. This was treachery, and she would have to stop him with any means necessary. She didn't want him to get hurt, but she had to do anything to protect her lord. His grey eyes stared down into her concerned hazel ones, her eyes reflected the conflict she felt in that moment.

She was torn between the loyalty of their cause, and the love she thought they shared with one another. Her eyes frantically searched for the slightest hint of regret, a waver in judgment, he couldn't do this to her. Not if he truly loved her. "Please, Reg, don't make me choose between the two. I love you more than you possibly can imagine." She began to tear up, he still hadn't said a word, just forced a hand out of her tight grip to trace the tear trail down her face. His thumb wiped the wetness from her lips.

"I know, Janelle. I know darling. But this must be done. I have to-"

"I gave up everything for you Regulus. I joined this very cause to stay with you, despite the danger, despite the risks. If I was with you, nothing else matter." His stroking paused, his solemn face finally frowned.

"I know. And I will never be able to repay you-" She interrupted again, just absolutely shocked at his response. She pulled from his embrace, taking a step back.

"I don't think you do. I gave up a quiet life, a comfortable engagement to be with you. You know my family wanted me to marry into the Rosier line. I convinced them the House of Black was the better option, that YOU, Regulus, were the better option!" His eyes held contempt, maybe forlorn for better solution but his face gave no indication whether her rant was stalling his decision or not.

"I gave up the right to have children! To be with you, Regulus, to be with you! I've always wanted to be a mother. But I put that aside. Because I had you, and you were enough. And now you're taking that from me!" She wrapped her arms around herself, turning away from her apparent ex-lover. "You're so bloody selfish!" He wrapped his arms around her, cocooning her trembling form in a familiar and somewhat welcomed hold. He brushed some of her freshly bleached hair from her ear.

"I'm doing this for everyone. You will see it eventually." He whispered, his voice full of pain.

"But this is all that we wanted."

"What our parents wanted, Janelle." She shook her head violently.

"No. What WE wanted, Regulus. We are adults, we make our own decisions now."

"Precisely. This is my decision."

"But how could you betray the dark lord like this? How could you betray me like this?" She sobbed, reaching for her wand. "You know what I'm going to have to do, right?" She felt his grasp tighten around her, preventing her from moving her arms. "Regulus?"

"I love you Janelle, more than anything in the world." She could feel the pressure of her wand and well as Regulus's pressed against her temple. She forcibly closed her eyes.

"Please don't do this, I love you too." She wasn't ready to die, she wasn't ready to leave without him. He kissed her golden locks.

"You'll forgive me one day. Oblivate."

"Answers." He muttered. Janelle huffed, her head reaming with a bloody migraine from his latest mind attack. "Black, a traitor." He stepped away from Janelle's pulsating body, she ached deep down into her core. Voldemort had really toyed inside her mind to find the answers he seeks. Not even Dumbledore had found the truth of Regulus's betrayal hidden in her mind. The Dark Lord was livid at the possibility, no reality of one of him own turning their backs from him.

"Your loyalties no longer pure, the old fool had seen to that." He muttered to her.

"Why do you say that?" She bit her lips shut when his attention snapped back towards her. He let out a sound of disapproval as he quickly approached her. She tried to move back, but there was little room on the loveseat she had unceremoniously thrown on. She flinched as he traced his wand on the side of her face, why did she try to solicit an explanation from him? What was wrong with her?

"I know when I see a Phoenix at heart. This 'Deidra' portion of your current life couldn't cope with the atrocities that Janelle committed. What Black had done all those years ago has poisoned your mind, her personality, and furthermore, her loyalty." He snarled jabbing his wand under her chin, forcing her to connect eyes once again.

"But it doesn't mean you completely useless to me. Loyal or not. I have found some purpose for your time spent here." He tapped her chin, opening her mouth wide. She fought trying to close it. She bucked her hips, thrashed her legs trying to stop the inevitable from happening again. Her mind was screaming. God damn Janelle! This was all her fault. Her baggage bled, no hemorrhaged into Deidra's quiet life!

"NO, NO!" She tried to fight his magic as hard as she could, the closer her face came towards the front of his loosened robes the more she-

"Imperio." Suddenly compliance once again, "now Janelle you're going to your master a good time."

---------------------------------

(Past: August 6th 1995)

"Sirius when had you found time to find yourself a woman?" Deidra, no, Janelle scoffed at the idea. She would never be passed around a family, especially to the brother of her late husband. As arrogant, and although as devilishly charming as he was in his youth, it still would never happen. She had experienced all the hurt, pain and confusion he had put Regulus through, she wouldn't allow herself to take his place in that fold of life. The redheaded man went to shake her hand, but she sneered at him, walking away to sit in a chair facing the fire. Charlie looked over at Sirius in surprise, who shrugged his shoulders in response and barked out a laugh.

"She isn't really a people person Charlie, don't mind her." Sirius glared back at Janelle, he had warned Albus that it wasn't a good time to bring her in. There was so much she did and didn't know, and he still couldn't be sure what her honest opinion about war was. The more times they had penetrated her long-lost memories the more of Janelle's old personality came through. As much as that was a comfort to him, her previous loyalties were not. He worried whether letting her sit in on this meeting was a smart idea or not. But he could trust Dumbledore, he had to.

Janelle was slammed up against the kitchen wall, scratching at her throat. A man with honey eyes and scars was panting and pressing a wand to hollow of her neck. She didn't know what had set him off, but he apparently didn't like Janelle. He looked terrible, dark circles under his eyes, a snarl on his lips.

"What are you doing here? Everyone thought you dead?!" He spat out at her. Sirius began tugging at the back of the man from the middle, harshly scolding him.

"Moony, calm down. Dumbledore will explain everything. Just calm down man." The man's eyes lightened for a moment before rage consumed him once more. Janelle was scared shitless.

"How can you forget what she did to you, to us, your friends? The things she did as a Deatheater?" She looked over the man's shoulder as Sirius struggle to contain his friend.

"No but, Moony, just," Sirius really tugged at the man's clothes. Janelle accepted her fate, she was going to be murdered by a scarred man in the ancestral home of her husband. She watched Sirius's long locks slick to his face as he began perspired in the struggle.

"She killed so many of them! How can you hold me back, forgiving her?!" Watching her panic features fade and a neutral expression in its place really enraged him, and his wolf. If she was dying by his hands, she was going to taste the pain and the fear! Not accept it willingly! He wanted her to feel just as they all did when her and Bellatrix-

"Remus! Remus what are you doing!" Janelle's eyes darted towards the door of the hallway, an older redheaded woman had covered her mouth, while another woman with pink hair appeared at the angry man's other side. She tried pulling at his wand arm, "Remus lower your wand!"

He snarled again, "you don't know anything about her, Dora! Or what she has done! Just ask your father what she had did to his family!" Janelle's eyes opened wide watching the woman's features morph. Her hair blazed red! She was metamorphous!

"Remus get ahold of yourself, before I make you!" The woman doled out, snapping the man from his aggressive stance. His cheeks flushed crimson before he loosened his grip from Janelle's neck. The woman pushed the man back, giving him a pointed look. He shook his head, breathing heavy, looking down at his hands. What had he done? Sirius patted the man on the back.

"Let's go take a breather mate," Sirius suggested, directing the other out of the room. The woman in front of Janelle calmed down as well, her hair turning back to bright pink. Janelle absentmindedly rubbed her raw throat. The pink haired woman turned, accessing Janelle's injuries.

"Don't mind Remus, it's a few days before…." The woman trailed off, like she hadn't meant for it to slip.

"The full moon?" Janelle sneered. The woman looked directly at Janelle now, if she hadn't been able to breathe before now her air was really taken from her. Those eyes, did everyone here have those eyes? Tonks stared hard at the woman trying to figure out how she knew.

"How would you know?"

"Lupin, Remus Lupin, right?" Janelle answered unsure. "I knew him in school, I think." Those blue-grey eyes were burning a hole into her soul. The woman backed a step and offered her hand.

"My name's Tonks. And you are?"

"Dei, no, Janelle. My name is Janelle." She shook her head again. "Are you a Black as well?" Tonks scrunched her brow, and pouted her lips.

"I wouldn't admit that willingly, but my mother was Black. Andromedra." That name Janelle recognized from the memories, but she couldn't remember exactly where. "She's first cousin to Sirius if you can believe." That sparked something, the sisters. Regulus's cousins: Bellatrix, Narcissa, and the disgraced one, Andromedra. Tonks watched in interest as she watched something changed in Janelle's eyes.

"She isn't going to be here as well, is she?" Tonks shook her head briefly, slightly amused.

"No, fighting has never really been her thing." She laughed, "Mum has always had a wicked temper though."

"Yes, yes, I remember it had rivaled Bella's on a good day," Janelle muttered.

---------------------------------

The sheer shock nearly subdued his self-control. This had to be a trick of his eyes. Even as many years have passed, Severus never forgot a face. "Janelle?" The extracurricular conversations quieted as their attention quickly shifted towards the usually silent and brooding potions master.

Sirius huffed, of course, Deatheater meeting another Deatheater, a quaint reunion he supposed. She looked around, for someone to offer a moment of clarity, who was this man? Raven colored, almost greasy tresses. Dark, feral eyes. Black robes a bit too big, giving him the appearance of an overgrown bat.

His expressionless face, not revealing any ounce of his true emotions, despite the surprise in his voice. He reminded her of boy in those memories, quiet, reserved other than a raging temper, but brilliant.

"Ah, yes Janelle, I see that Snivil-" she cut him off, while Snape fought the immediate desire to curse Sirius.

"His name is Severus, I thought by now you'd grown from childish sentiments." Sirius was a bit perturbed by his former sister in law, but released a barking laugh.

"Not today love, not today." Sirius sat down at the table, mockingly gesturing for Severus to sit as well.

"I'd rather pitch myself from the Astronomy tower." Severus backed a few paces, taking his usual spot by the corner of the wall. Sirius kicked his legs up on the table crossing his feet.

"Suit yourself." Everyone now turned their attention to the last guests to enter the room, a disgruntled Remus sat down next to his friend, while the headmaster greeted everyone with a small smile.

"Now that everyone is acquainted we have lengthy matters to discuss."

-----------------------------

Severus's head was still swirling as he recounted the turn of events to Narcissa. She was formerly a Black, and wife to one of their Lord's inner circle; who other than her will have any guidance about this situation?

"Can you make heads or tails of this Narcissa?" She sat her tea down, massage her forehead with her left hand.

"Of course, the Black family wasn't already complicated enough." She sighed, "What would you like me to do here?"

"I'm not sure. I only got bits and pieces about why she was there and how they had found her."

"Where is Regulus then?" She leaned back in her chair, "wasn't he the one to orchestrate their disappearance?"

"Presumed dead. He had erased her memories and forced h-"

"Erased her memories? What for?"

"Apparently to leave her to live a sheltered life in a muggle community. Never knowing who she truly was and never meeting another magical being."

"How horrible!" She said incredulously. "To be abandoned to live like filth. But with that being said, how does she know what she does?"

"He preserved memories, books, lists, articles, everything she would need to self-teach. He had set up a modest endowment and a rather comfortable housing for her as well. He must have been planning it for months." Narcissa sighed once again.

"With all that planning, you would think he would have went with her? Or perhaps little cousin was caught? But whom? No one had said anything about his cowardice."

[iwritehorsethings]

Applecore - MLP One Shot

Cross-post from FimFiction. If you enjoy, please consider following and giving a thumbs up!

Summary: Applejack thinks about the void she fills within her family.

Rating: Everyone

Genre: Drama, General

Written before “The Perfect Pear”.

Art by Kallarmo.

Beneath a lone apple tree on a tall hill, Applejack was finding herself concerned with the inevitable advance of time, a dimension she had always received without falter, but that particular summer evening had her preoccupied by the steady march of seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years...

Her brow furrowed over her green gaze as the setting sun painted long shadows over the land that four generations of her family had toiled with love and sweat. She could feel her pride, strong and healthy like a big barreled tree in her chest. Sweet Apple Acres was their home. It had been since Granny Smith and her kin had come to this valley and helped establish Ponyville.

So then where were Applejack's parents?

It was a question that the farm mare typically avoided wrestling with. Fretting over the endless wanderlust of her parents, Honeycrisp and Jonagold, wouldn't keep her family fed or the farm running. Granny Smith was too old for most of the chores, and Big Macintosh didn't understand more than half of the unique challenges a young filly like Applebloom struggled with. It was up to Applejack to lead her family in these regards. There was nopony else.

The responsibility didn't scare her. It settled over Applejack's strong withers like a familiar blanket, warm and soft, despite its weight. However, trickling down her heart as thick and as viscous as sap was a sense of loss. These seconds, minutes, and hours were irretrievable once they slipped through the sieve of existence into the hungry sea of yesterday. That was time her parents could never recover. All those moments, all those memories, all those experiences...gone. They had missed so many of Applejack's accomplishments, both in running their farm and in her service to the Equestrian kingdom with her friends. They had missed Applebloom singing on stage with her friends and Coloratura. At this rate, they stood to miss the day when Big Mac married, and worse yet, Granny Smith's final days.

The last Applejack had spoken to her parents face to face had been when she was a teenager, barely out of school. Applebloom was still a foal too young to begin her education proper. It was an early foggy morning, and the whippoorwills were still chirping sleepily in the orchards. Honeycrisp's bright red coat was hidden under an emerald cloak as she carried a basket of sundries to their covered wagon. Her muzzle, which was lightly frosted in a soft lime shade, was split wide in a grin when she told Applejack with a wink of her green eye, "We're off to unlock all the secrets of apples." When her daughter helped her load the basket onto the carriage, she added sagely, "After all, there's more to farmin' than sticking seeds into the ground!"

"Darn tootin'," Jonagold pitched in with an energetic whinny as he cantered over to his wife and daughter, the brim of his stetson hat tilted up high. Behind him trailed Granny Smith, and Big Macintosh, the latter carrying a young Applebloom. "There ain't no nobler a pursuit than the refinement of one's profession. Right, AJ?"

Applejack smiled, her chest puffing at her father's attention. "Yes, Pa! Nothin' nobler."

Jonagold laughed and ruffled her mane. "That's my girl!' He turned to the rest of the family. "Mama, ah know you'd rather we stick closer to the homestead and quit our roamin', but trust that your one and only son is carryin' on those supernal values you so determinedly hammered into his thick skull. Hoof shakin' and continuous discourse with prospective customers in this competitive mart o' commerce is the best way to ensure the longevity of our clan, so--"

"Jona, will you stop your highfalutin ramblin' and jes' get on that there wagon before I whop you a good'un?" Granny Smith snapped. "Heavens, you talk as if we ain't out here freezin' our flanks in this chill!"

Jonagold threw his blonde head back for a hearty laugh. "Oh! Mama, I do so love you. I'll count the days till you can whop me again," he chortled as he gave her a hug. He turned next to Big Mac, his head raising high with a smirk. "And you, son. Protect the mares. Don't shy from the hard jobs--you know these gals are strong, but you're the strongest. Got that?"

Big Mac mirrored the smirk on his father's soft orange face. "Eyup!" he said.

The older stallion patted a hoof on his son's shoulder. "Atta boy." Next he moved to kiss Applebloom on the head. "See ya soon, little filly. Pa loves you. Don't grow up too fast, y'hear?"

He turned around and regarded Applejack, his blue eyes meeting her green. Behind him, Honeycrisp said goodbye to her mother-in-law and other children. With a gentle smile, the stallion took off his stetson hat, and placed it upon his daughter's head. "And you, sugarcube. I trust you to help your brother keep the trees healthy and the bits flowin'. Ain't nobody got a greener touch than you, Applejack."

She beamed. "I promise to take care of the farm and the family, Pa. It's all in good hooves!"

He kissed her brow and stepped back to allow Honeycrisp to hug her daughter. "I know it is."

She couldn't have known how long she would be held to that promise. For all Applejack knew, it could extend into infinity the way her parents seemed to find more reasons to stay on the road, traveling ever further in their pursuit of new business and farming knowledge. So much time had gone by. The last letter she had received had been a year ago. In just that amount of time, Applebloom had earned her cutie mark. What other things would her parents miss out on? What if Granny Smith passed on? What if Big Mac had foals of his own? Applejack had no way of reaching her parents to send the news. No way of finding them, either.

The question of whether they truly loved their family above all else was an unwelcome thought, but AJ found herself unable to resist it as she glared at the setting sun, its dying light making her green eyes smolder.

"Applejack?" Granny Smith's voice called out to the mare from further down the hill.

Applejack turned, her eyes fluttering as she took in her granny making the arduous trip to join her granddaughter under the apple tree. The farm mare jumped to her hooves and trotted to her elder, her brow creasing with concern. "Granny, what do you think you're doing trottin' all the way out here with them creaky hips o' yours? I thought you were helping Applebloom with supper!"

"I was," Granny shot back with an affronted glare as she shook of AJ's attempt at walking her up the slope. "But then I saw you sittin' up here all on your lonesome and figgered somethin' must be wrong! Now I know I figgered right."

Applejack's ears pinned flat against her head. "Ah'm fine, Granny."

A graceless snort. "The hay you are."

Now the younger mare glowered. "Ah just wanted to think on my own for a while. Tain't nothing to raise the alarm about!"

Granny sighed, the lines of her aged eyes softening as she sat on the grass. "I saw the look on yer face when the mail was brought in. Today makes it a year, don't it?"

Applejack looked away without saying anything.

Granny Smith placed a hoof on her granddaughter's back. "Applejack, if there's one thing I learnt about your father early on, it was that he was a rollin' stone. It's how he met yer mother. It's how our family's apples have become a staple of Equestria."

"So that makes it okay that he and Ma miss so much?" Applejack retorted heatedly. "I'm grateful for the work they do, but is it really necessary for my parents to leave us behind for so long? I thought Apples were s'posed to plant roots, not blow in the wind!"

The elderly mare's lips puckered. "Ah wonder," she said slowly. "What really has ya so riled up, granddaughter. You mad a'cuz you feel your folks haven't been here, or a'cuz you're afraid you ain't enough to fill their horseshoes?"

Applejack scowled. "You know I don't shy from work, and I'd do anythin' for our family!"

"I know that. But yer just one mare, Applejack. Big Macintosh is gettin' to that age where he's gonna be settlin' down soon. He'd still be here to help on the farm, but that leaves ya to raise Applebloom on your own once I pass on. We both know that's a'gonna be soon."

Her granddaughter winced. "Aw, Granny, don't talk about that..."

"Hush. You know it's true." Granny rubbed AJ's back, a warm smile spreading across her muzzle. "But you oughta know somethin'. In the years since your Pa left, I have seen you learn and grow so much with your friends that ah'm sure the day he finally gets his hide back here, he'll be so gobsmacked you'll have to poke him with a pitchfork!" Despite herself, Applejack chuckled at the image. Granny Smith's eyes brightened and she squeezed the younger mare in a tight one-legged hug. "You done a wonderful job with Applebloom so far. She's gonna grow up to be a fine mare, you'll see. And this farm? Shoot, it runs smoother than a greased pig over ice! Don't doubt yerself, Applejack. Yer more than enough for this family. Why, yer the core o' the apple!"

Applejack's eyes misted. She smiled with a stiffened lip and hugged Granny Smith around the barrel. "Thanks, Granny. Ah love ya more than ah can put into words!"

"Thank goodness!" Granny chuckled over her shoulder. "If there's one thing ah count my lucky stars for ever'day, it's that ya didn't pick up your Pa's gift o' gab!"

The farm mare pulled back and winked. "Now I wouldn't go alleging my apparent lack of verbosity, Granny Smith! After all, how you think ah manage to sell our precious product in that competitive mart of commerce so well?"

Granny Smith pulled Applejack's stetson hat over her eyes. "Hush, you! I can still whop ya good, just like your Pa!" She gingerly stood to all hooves. "Now we better git back to the house a'fore your sister burns it down..."

Smiling happily, Applejack walked back home with her granny, her mind no longer preoccupied with the inevitable advance of time. Not its seconds, hours, or its years...

[paraseekersuk]

Associating Energy

Discussing energy, the comparing of, and associations.

Humans have been associating and comparing things with one another since the dawn of our existence, and that is not different for the witch of yesterday and today. We are constantly associating colours, symbols, places, smells, and god knows what else with other things. Some of the associations are overlapping, meaning that in one culture or society one symbol might mean one thing and in another culture or society it means something completely different. This alone creates a boundary in comparing associations with one another, though it doesn't make things complicated if common ground is found, often through way of discussion with others. If you could imagine a world we all had the same world view it would be a daunting task to create and embark on magic for it is a unique brand fit to each individual. How you perform your magic, why you perform your magic, and the way you view your magic will result in the type of result you may achieve.Grade nine science teaches us that everything is made of energy and everything created requires energy. So how does one create a spell? It is a process of putting together energy, intent, will, and purpose varying, positivity or negativity. To get to my point I'm going to break down that sentence. Each one of us views everything differently from another person, so it's only rational to conclude that we would see and experience energy differently and eventually the well devoted practitioner will develop their own methods for working with energy. Because I feel very connected to the land I live on, I'm constantly gathering energy for my spells and rituals from the foliage around me and the large population of wildlife always nearby. Although I don't often put myself in a meditative trance anymore for spell casting, I would suggest a person new to spell casting to meditate before their actions so that they can both clear and focus their mind on their objective. Once you're familiar with energy, you should almost be able to pick it out as easy as remembering a smell such as vanilla or cinnamon. Your intent is what you want to happen. If you can develop a method in which you intertwine your intent with the energy around you and take control of that energy because it has something to it that is a part of you. Your will and intent go hand in hand. If you intent is there but your will to do it isn't, your magic won't work. When it comes down to the negativity and positivity side of the spectrum, this is usually where society has come to dictate what is good and what is bad. The type of energy you'd look to create for your spell would be solely dependent on what type of spell you're looking to cast. If you're looking to get revenge on someone who has done you wrong, your energy might feel heavy and dark for you have poured and intertwined your intent with it. As soon as your intent has become intertwined with the energy, you decide if it's good or bad which will determine how the spell manifests itself.There are entire practices devoted to aligning colours to varying degrees of magic, most common I have found is correspondence work. There are traces of the use of colour in practices and traditions dating back to well before the Christian church. Some have argued that there is no colour in magic, and while I don't personally hold with that statement, I do believe it has truth to it. As I mentioned above, there is a process from which energy that was not in use, or raw energy, turns into useful energy which can be visualised in any colour that the individual finds suitable. Not only are colours useful in spell casting, but also in craft making, and ritual work among a huge number of practices that have recently become modernly popular. Though tools such as candles have been used for centuries, with different colour candles for different ritual intent.Have you ever gotten a whiff of something and for a moment it takes you away to another time and memory? That's because you remember what you associated that energy with. It's amazing what we can unlock with a little bit of association and correspondence, isn't it? Well not really but let me explain. If we started comparing and associating everything with something we begin to hit walls of a breakdown where no one would understand why someone would associate that with that, if that makes sense. There would be no peer corraborated gnosis for a number of things and we'd all be UPG (unverifiable personal gnosis) practitioners on a number of levels. This complicates how magic is taught because everyone wants to put in their two cents.As witches and practitoners we each observe the world around us differently, but all of us are aware of the energy. We realise how much it is to us and we completely forget what it was like to be ignorant of the energy around us, it becomes something that we can just look for and feel naturally with little effort once you've become comfortable with it. Different types of energy will attract different types of people, though within that context we are all the same, from the same source. We each have our own stamp to our aura or energy, and that also helps decide the course that we take through magic.Energy is such a vast and complex force that it truly profounds me when I think about it on any deep level. How it ebbs and flows, creating life here and taking life there. The things that we can associate with energy is infinite as it is a natural force and everything becomes natural when you boil it down to the raw basics. The turth is that energy is alive and it's around us every day, living and breathing. Energy is who we are and energy is what our lives are made of to the very core, and learning how to control, manipulate, associate, and properly use magic is often easier than most people realise. Unlocking the door of energy work will be the first of many doors for you the practitioner to unlock. It will offer you a basic understanding of magic and many practices or paths are centered around some sort of energy, such as a deity. So as you see, energy is constantly around is, swirling and carrying the energy waves of others, and it is easy to be blind of something that is so natural we nearly take it for granted without our knowledge.

[ecotone99]

[RF] The Prologue and first chapter of a story I call The Horizon's Hues (long)

I look out of glazed eyes onto a colorless cafeteria were at least two hundred of my classmates eat, talk, laugh, and gossip over the round tables filling the giant room. Almost everyone enjoys the short period of the day where whole friend groups and romantic pairs can be together. Everyone's caught up in their conversations or activities, but no one is oblivious to the people in the room who don’t hold lunch so high on their favorites list. Not everyone has someone to spend lunch with. We are told to be nice and look for people who might be alone, but no one ever does. Even the looming presence of teachers don’t have the compassion to reach out. I am one of these people called “loners”. From my point of view the loners are just seeking attention by being pitied and sneaking their way into friend groups of people who feel sorry for them. Me on the other hand try to attract as little attention as possible, sometimes even going out of my way to avoid it. Some of these loners crave friendship and social acceptance, but I see no purpose in such things. After all I am still alive after 16 years and I have had no one I would consider a so called friend. People laugh and cry together, but these feeling have always been a mystery to me. I could never relate to being angry, sad, joyful, etc. Even tho I saw people around me running about with smiles or tears on their faces. I could never quite decipher the reasoning behind them. This is one of the two reasons I tend to stray away from the herd. The other reason is that I can’t see color. My eyes see things differently than most people. I see grays and blacks and whites while others see a rainbow of color. It is like watching the black and white channel on tv because you can’t find the remote so you decide to just deal with it. Emotions play a strong role in the foundation of any relationship. Be it love in a friendship or romantic relationship or admiration in a worker to boss relation or in a child and parent relationship. What many people don’t realize is how much color has to do in a relationship. Imagine a friend asking you if a color looks good on them, or if you like the color scheme of something, or even just talking about your favorite colors. With how little I know about emotions matched with my sight is a deadly dose in any friendship. It is just too hard to relate to everyone all the time, so I prefer to be alone.

I wake to the sound of a dying animal that is my alarm clock. I turn to my left and quickly hit the off button to stop the onslaught of noise invading my ears and ripping me violently from my dreams. I look at the clock to see flashing light gray numbers that read 6:30. I sluggishly sit up and rub my eyes not quite ready to get out of my lumpy bed. I look out of the top window where I am greeted with a sunrise. I should see a light blue sky with a blend of beautiful hues of red, orange and purple, but instead it all gloops together into a mush of grays. The astonishing view of the Texas sunrise has been reduced to what looks like a crumpled up family picture with all the memories it once had gone with the people that held them so close. I turn my head to my room dismissing the sight. The room is small and quaint giving it a homey vibe. It was originally an attic, but after I turned six my mom thought I should have my own room instead of sharing one with her. So she transform the attic into a small bedroom for me. My bed is push underneath the only window in the room which has a badly installed air conditioner that lets in rain. Across the room is a vanity with the mirror ripped out and an emo band poster in its place. It’s matched with a “rolling” office chair that has lost all of its feet and now can only swivel. I stand up and walk over to my dresser resting against the far wall. It has mixed matched handles not one quite resembling another, a rooted off top exposing the top drawers, and only one foot making it lopsided. I open one of the middle drawers and grab my usual outfit of a plain t-shirt and a pair of jeans. I change my clothes, throwing the dirty ones in a hamper, then stand in front of the vanity mirror I nailed to one of the beams holding the house’s roof up. Inside I see my small body reflected back at me. People have told me I have brown eyes and that match my brown, wavy, long hair. I part my hair into a left side part and steal one last scan of myself before I go. I’m shorter and thinner than average with some of my bone visible in some spots with my hair reaching to the middle of my back. I walk towards the door and grab my signature light gray jacket and my messenger bag. I bend down and lift the hatch that leads to a later for easy access to the ground floor. I climb down, walk through the hallway and turn past the living area to the kitchen. My mom sits half in and half out if the window with a cigarette in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other. Her hair is pulled back into a messy bun and she has a gray waitress uniform on that says Jo’s Dinner across the breast pocket. When she notices I am there she blows a puff of smoke out the window and turns to face me.

“How’s my little angel doing this morning,” my mom asks in an bright tone.

“Fine” This is the same routine we go through every morning. My mom has called me angel since I was a little girl because whenever someone watched me they would always tell my mom I was an angel. I still don’t really break the rules if there isn’t a reason to, so my reputation still reigns true.

“So what are you going to do this weekend,” my mom questions as she turns back to the window.

“Sarah asked if I could spend the night at her house tonight if your cool with it,” I say trying to attempt a happy voice.

“Of course you can go. You do know you can have your friends over here,” my mom said in a in a worried tone.

“Yes” I say in an exasperated voice.

I walk over to the counter and steal a piece of my mom’s toast before I head out.

“Bye mom” I say closing the door not giving her time to respond.

I walk down the sidewalk with my earbuds in and my old mp3 player playing some old music. As the prospect of school looms literally around the corner I like to distract myself with the classic rock songs of the 80’s. The entrance to school is always crowded with people standing around waiting for friends, so I tend to sneak in one of the back doors. The theater kids use as a loading dock for there props and they have a bad habit of leaving it unlocked after their practices. I walk over to the dock and open the door to find a pitch black hallway that leads to the stage of the auditorium. I walk to the end and then on stage and I keep going until I am at the door leading out of the room. I push it open and walk into a common area waiting room where people wait for the doors to concerts of plays to open. Like me, a mediocre amount of students wait for class here in the mornings. I find an open chair in the corner and turn up my headphones to max to block out as much sound as possible. I peer over a boy’s shoulder and read the time off his phone and see that I have about twenty minutes before I need to head for class. I lean back in my chair the best I can and close my eyes. I let my mind run wild, thinking about a different life in a far off place. I settle on a fantasy world full of magic and let my mind naturally create a life and scenarios in it. I call theses moments alone Mind Movies. Whenever I am bored or waiting to do something I “watch” a Mind Movie.

I have a feeling it is about time to go so I open my eyes and look at the time again. I was about five minutes early, but I guess I could leave now. Getting up I walk past the tables of the common area and try and exit out into the hall. I walk down the crowded hallways squeezing pass my priors to get to first period. I eventually find my way to B108 my history class. My seat is in the back next to the far wall. I sit right behind this girl who reads under her breath and talks to the guy beside her a little too much. Her friend used to sit next to me, but she got moved across the room for “inappropriate classroom edict” in other words she was talking during the lessons.

I am usually the first one to sit down since the rest of the class is talking to their friends either in here or the hall, today is no different. I take my seat and look up to the clock which reads 8:35 about ten minutes until the bell for class rings. A group of kids sit in the corner adjacent to mine talking about the latest drama. I pull out my library book called Frozen Sun. I turn to the six chapter labeled Icy Cores where I left off yesterday and start to read about the dead suns of the universe. I get so invested that I almost don’t realize when someone takes the seat next to me. This isn’t unusual for a group of students to sometimes take the seat back here to talk, but this time without even looking up I know this person is alone.

“Hi my name is Claire,” she says in my direction. I can tell that this greeting is meant to be reciprocated, but I don’t want to have a talking session take away from my book.

“Hi,” I say hoping the short response will scare her away.

“ Um... what’s your name?”

By the tone of her voice I can tell my strategy is working.

“ Val.”

“Well Val, I am new here and Mr. Stewart told me this seat was open and that if I had any questions or need help finding something in the building than to ask someone around me,” she says seeming to have her confidence back.

“Well the girl that sits in front of me will be more than happy to show you around. Her name is Sarah by the way.”

“Oh... thanks I guess,” she said in a somewhat confused sounding voice. I am pretty sure she is done talking to me so I return to my book that my eyes never left in the first place.

“So what do we usually do in this class anyways,” Claire says with a brighter tone then before. It is almost like she knows what I am doing and fighting back with her intrusiveness. Well I can fight too.

“ I don’t understand why you are still talking to me when I already said that Sarah would answer your questions,” I say putting a little irritation in my voice. That will definitely get her to leave me alone.

“I just.. thought we.. could be friends,” she says in a small voice.

I am a little taken aback by this. No one has ever tied to be my “friend” since preschool maybe because we haven’t had an new people in years and word of me spreads quickly to new comers. I can’t stop myself before my reaction slips and I look up from my book to see a girl with light gray hair and a nice shirt and jeans sitting next to me. She is looking at me with an emotion I can’t quite place in her dark eyes.

“Oh,” I say not thinking.

Ding ding

“Class take your seats it is time to start. Please turn to page 56 in your history book.”

It looks like I lost …or was she even fighting?

submitted by /u/PowerfulResearcher [link] [comments] via Blogger http://bit.ly/2Hscc9B

[winebleeds-a]

HORSES ARE SUPPOSE TO RUN FROM SNAKES.     yet,     you   exist     (  the snake coil around the gazing horse’s neck  ).    and   you   thrive.     a   lovely   set   of   contradictions   as   the   phoenix’s   supernova.     fields   emerald   despite   the   constant   silver   sky     (  just don’t show the ruby liquid under your skin  ).    they   shout    ‘  you’re not suppose to breathe  ’     yet,     you   prevail.     AND YOU BEGIN TO RUN AHEAD OF THE HERD.

status  :  half-blood (  paternal grandfather was a muggle / no-maj  ) current location  :  yorkshire,     but  commutes   to   london   with   lots   of   floo   powder     (  nyc for america  ) occupation     :     junior   assistant   to   the   head   of   the   department   of   international   magical   cooperation,     ministry   of   magic     (  similar position for MACUSA  ) wand   :  chestnut   wood   with   a   phoenix   feather   core,    9 ¾"   and   hard   flexibility patronus  :  white  stallion house  :  slytherin     (  horned serpent for ilvermorny  )

the paternal lineage claimed direct descent to the original spencers of yorkshire, but took until the 20th century for an owl to give one an acceptance letter. edmund spencer found himself among an unfamiliar world, having to use every bit of spencer’s signature suave to somehow woo the pure blood to later become his wife. however, the first wave of death eaters caused her heroic death, merely days before voldemort’s demise at the potter infant. decades later, he found himself raising his three grandchildren at the wishes of his only son & daughter-in-law. and so the three spencer children grew up on the yorkshire estate, learning muggle’s sports and listening to stories on hippogriffs & unicorns while the second wizarding war raged far away.

elizabeth, the middle child, became his accidental favorite (because a grandpa wasn’t suppose to have favorites).  not only did she share his wife’s name, but she was the spitting image of his elizabeth, his ‘lovely set of contradictions,’ as he teased on the hogwart’s quad many years ago. a nose always in a book yet feet always in the mud.  questions constantly asked yet mouth constantly closed through introspective.  the huff following laughter whenever his callous hands ruffle blonde hair. getting anyway with anything she wanted, though he thought her most obedient. and, being the only little spencer to start riding the horses on the estate, she caught most of his attention & he her biggest role model. both revolved around each other’s worlds.  only he didn’t expect her to sort into slytherin when he received the news.

green & silver were still synonyms of prejudice in his mind. memories of ‘mudblood’ rang in his ears, scars on his arms from the first war, & heart broken when an old slytherin peer tortured lizzie until her last breath.  the first four wizards holding the spencer surname, blood & marriage, were gryffndors. and he didn’t mind raleigh, his grandson, introducing the badger with the lions (two minutes with that boy, & it was obvious he was hufflepuff).  but elizabeth slithering into the rival house!? that was spitting on her namesake’s grave!! thus, he hardly spoke a word to his favorite granddaughter for five years, letting everyone blaming elderly grouchiness for his grunts.

through this time, his younger grandchild kept the tradition of red & gold, becoming the first quidditch star in the family.  he even went to one of maddie’s matches during his final years, & grew out of breath with each shout when she blocked the goalposts.  raleigh excelled in potions & herbology, transforming himself to become a great doctor in the wizarding world; he even learnt muggle medical knowledge through the books & internet whenever visiting the yorkshire estate (the more edmund remained at yorkshire, the more he accustomed to his muggle roots).  meanwhile, elizabeth? well, she was still a set of contradictions humming to, what’s that old american singer (oh!) james taylor’s ‘fire and rain.’

one, she resembled lizzie after every visit. but elizabeth never wore a smile anymore, replaced with an apathetic frown that he couldn’t quite place its origins. though her eyes were the spencer’s sandy brown, they somehow sparkled like lizzie’s ocean blue.  words escaping lips like dragon’s flames, but the tone frozen with contact of the air.  who cares if she was the top of her class, & became prefect, edmund swore (even complained to his son) that slytherin drained the girl’s happiness & any worth of living a good life.

that is, until the following conversation took place, forever ingrained in his memory  :

           ‘  mum   told   me   to   talk   to   you.  ’            ‘  hmph.  ’            ‘  don’t  worry.    i   advised   her   a   conversation   would   be   pointless.  ’            ‘  don’t   cross   your   arms.  ’            ‘  or   have   you   criticizing   my   every   moment.     anyways,     i   finally   manifested   a   patronus   before   break.  ’            ‘  hrm.  ’            ‘  looked   exactly   like   pearl.  ’

and, in that moment he realized the tension between the two was more than rival houses. why he kept seeing lizzie in every atom of elizabeth’s teenage figure when, frankly, the only similarities were the name & blonde hair.  pinpointing the origin of her deadpan expression & her own lovely set of contradictions.

           ‘  you  know  why   i   bought   white  stallions.  ’            ‘  of  course   i   know.     i’ve   done   minimal   research   on   the   possibility   of   patronus’   connection   to   gen-  ’            ‘  don’t   sass   me!     and   did   hogwarts   not   teach   you   patronus   are   from   the  happiest  memories?  ’            ‘  yes.     i   know   that.     but-  ’

and the rest of that evening faded with elizabeth spilling 21st century magic & muggle terms that would puzzle most 50-year-olds walking to the corner of 60. however, with arms wide opened, the two rekindled old bonds, though the warmth would appear cold to a stranger’s first glance. yet, elizabeth became his favorite again, ignoring his prejudice of the green hoodie she often wore during their early morning trips to the stable.   there, she gained wisdom that 9 ‘outstanding’ owls(the others “exceeding expectations’) & 7 ‘Outstanding’ newts could not teach her, & he somewhat absorbed her political talks, even growing his own concern of the US’ president-elect & his effects for America’s (and even international) wizarding population.

in fact, she currently lives with him at the yorkshire estate he claims residency of the spencer family since ancestral tribal clans settled the property. she shakes her head every time he states those facts, not realizing he utter the same sentence around the same time last week.  he knows his mind is fading with over 70 years of thoughts knitting through his furrowed eyebrows. she cares for the estate, including the horses, with the little free time she acquires herself.  he may forget what he ate for dinner yesterday, but he registers the desired independence she’s waiting to unlock (though he complain to her that she needs a man by now; he already had a child by her age!) that knows, deep down, came from genetics (even a loved one by your side has more freedom than parents & other family members over your shoulders). her mouth moves, perhaps a reminder that lunch is in the blue container, but he’s not paying attention to the words as she step into the fireplace.  instead, when she vanishes in the green flames, he smiles, relaxing in his reclining chair.

                       –      ‘  i’m   proud   of   you,    lizzie.  ’

[techscopic]

Recovering from the Windows 10 Insiders Fast 17017 volsnap.sys reboot GSOD/BSOD

NOTE: I’m not involved with the Windows Team or the Windows Insider Program. This blog is my own and written as a user of Windows. I have no inside information. I will happily correct this blog post if it’s incorrect. Remember, don’t just do stuff to your computer because you read it on a random blog. Think first, backup always, then do stuff.

Beta testing is always risky. The Windows Insiders Program lets you run regular early builds of Windows 10. There’s multiple “rings” like Slow and Fast – depending on your risk tolerance, and bandwidth. I run Fast and maybe twice a year there’s something bad-ish that happens like a bad video driver or a app that doesn’t work, but it’s usually fixed within a week. It’s the price I pay for happily testing new stuff. There’s the Slow ring which is more stable and updates like once a month vs once a week. That ring is more “baked.”

This last week, as I understand it, a nasty bug made it out to Fast for some number of people (not everyone but enough that it sucked) myself included.

I don’t reboot my Surface Book much, maybe twice a month, but I did yesterday while preparing for the DevIntersection conference and suddenly my main machine was stuck in a “Repairing Windows” reboot loop. It wouldn’t start, wouldn’t repair. I was FREAKING out. Other people I’ve seen report a Green Screen of Death (GSOD/BSOD) loop with an error in volsnap.sys.

TO FIX IT

The goal is to get rid of the bad volsnap from Windows 10 Insiders build version 17017 and replace that one file with a non-broken version from a previous build. That’s your goal. There’s a few ways to do this, so you need to put some thought into how you want to do it.

NOTE: At the time of this writing, Fast Build 17025 is rolling out and fixes this, so if you can take that build you’re cool, and no worries. Do it.

1. Can you boot Windows 10 off something else? USB/DVD?

Can you boot off something else like another version Windows 10 USB key or a DVD? Boot off your recovery media as if you’re re-installing Windows 10 BUT DO NOT CLICK INSTALL.

You may need to do special keystrokes to boot off your USB key. On Lenovo it’s F2, or F10. On Surfaces it’s Power+Volume Down. Go search for “boot off use MANUFACTURER NAME” for your computer!

Do you not have a copy of Windows 10 you can put on an 8 gig or larger USB? You can use this download tool on another machine to make a bootable Windows 10 USB.

When you’ve run Windows 10 Setup, instead click Repair, then Troubleshoot, then Command Prompt. It’s especially important to get to the Command Prompt this way rather than pressing Shift-10 as you enter setup, because this path will allow you to unlock your possibly BitLockered C: drive.

NOTE: If your boot drive is bitlockered you’ll need to go to http://ift.tt/2dehOSV on another machine or your phone and find your computer’s Recovery Key. You’ll enter this as you press Troubleshoot and it will allow you to access your now-unencrypted drive from the command prompt.

At this point all your drive letters may be weird. Take a moment and look around. Your USB key may be X: or Z:. Your C: drive may be D: or E:.

2. Do you have an earlier version of volsnap.sys? Find it.

If you’ve been taking Windows Insiders Builds/Flights, you may have a C:\Windows.old folder. Remembering to be conscious of your drive letters, you want to rename the bad volsnap and copy in the old one from elsewhere. In this example, I get it from C:\Windows.old.

ren C:\windows\system32\drivers\volsnap.sys C:\windows\system32\drivers\volsnap.sys.bak copy C:\windows.old\windows\system32\drivers\volsnap.sys C:\windows\system32\drivers\volsnap.sys

Unfortunately, *I* didn’t have a C:\windows.old folder as I used Disk Cleanup to get more space. I found a good volsnap.sys from another machine in my house and copied it to the root of the USB key I booted off up. In that case my copy command was different as I copied from my USB key to c:\windows\system32\drivers, but the GOAL was the same – get a good volsnap.sys.

Once I resolved my boot issue, I went to Windows Update and am now updating to 17025.

PLEASE, friends – BACK UP YOUR STUFF. Remember the Backup Rule of Three.

Here’s the rule of three. It’s a long time computer-person rule of thumb that you can apply to your life now. It’s also called the Backup 3-2-1 rule.

3 copies of anything you care about – Two isn’t enough if it’s important.

2 different formats – Example: Dropbox+DVDs or Hard Drive+Memory Stick or CD+Crash Plan, or more

1 off-site backup – If the house burns down, how will you get your memories back?

Beta testing will cost you some time, and system crashes happen. But are they a nightmare data loss scenario or are they an irritant. For me this was a scary “can’t boot” scenario, but I had another machine and my stuff was backed up.

Don’t take beta builds of anything on your primary machine that you care about and that makes you money.

DISCLAIMER: I love you but this blog post has NO warranty. I have no idea what I’m doing and if this makes your non-bootable beta software machine even worse, that’s on you, Dear Reader.

Sponsor: Check out JetBrains Rider: a new cross-platform .NET IDE. Edit, refactor, test and debug ASP.NET, .NET Framework, .NET Core, Xamarin or Unity applications. Learn more and download a 30-day trial!

© 2017 Scott Hanselman. All rights reserved.

      Recovering from the Windows 10 Insiders Fast 17017 volsnap.sys reboot GSOD/BSOD syndicated from http://ift.tt/2wBRU5Z

[techscopic]

Recovering from the Windows 10 Insiders Fast 17017 volsnap.sys reboot GSOD/BSOD

NOTE: I’m not involved with the Windows Team or the Windows Insider Program. This blog is my own and written as a user of Windows. I have no inside information. I will happily correct this blog post if it’s incorrect. Remember, don’t just do stuff to your computer because you read it on a random blog. Think first, backup always, then do stuff.

Beta testing is always risky. The Windows Insiders Program lets you run regular early builds of Windows 10. There’s multiple “rings” like Slow and Fast – depending on your risk tolerance, and bandwidth. I run Fast and maybe twice a year there’s something bad-ish that happens like a bad video driver or a app that doesn’t work, but it’s usually fixed within a week. It’s the price I pay for happily testing new stuff. There’s the Slow ring which is more stable and updates like once a month vs once a week. That ring is more “baked.”

This last week, as I understand it, a nasty bug made it out to Fast for some number of people (not everyone but enough that it sucked) myself included.

I don’t reboot my Surface Book much, maybe twice a month, but I did yesterday while preparing for the DevIntersection conference and suddenly my main machine was stuck in a “Repairing Windows” reboot loop. It wouldn’t start, wouldn’t repair. I was FREAKING out. Other people I’ve seen report a Green Screen of Death (GSOD/BSOD) loop with an error in volsnap.sys.

TO FIX IT

The goal is to get rid of the bad volsnap from Windows 10 Insiders build version 17017 and replace that one file with a non-broken version from a previous build. That’s your goal. There’s a few ways to do this, so you need to put some thought into how you want to do it.

NOTE: At the time of this writing, Fast Build 17025 is rolling out and fixes this, so if you can take that build you’re cool, and no worries. Do it.

1. Can you boot Windows 10 off something else? USB/DVD?

Can you boot off something else like another version Windows 10 USB key or a DVD? Boot off your recovery media as if you’re re-installing Windows 10 BUT DO NOT CLICK INSTALL.

You may need to do special keystrokes to boot off your USB key. On Lenovo it’s F2, or F10. On Surfaces it’s Power+Volume Down. Go search for “boot off use MANUFACTURER NAME” for your computer!

Do you not have a copy of Windows 10 you can put on an 8 gig or larger USB? You can use this download tool on another machine to make a bootable Windows 10 USB.

When you’ve run Windows 10 Setup, instead click Repair, then Troubleshoot, then Command Prompt. It’s especially important to get to the Command Prompt this way rather than pressing Shift-10 as you enter setup, because this path will allow you to unlock your possibly BitLockered C: drive.

NOTE: If your boot drive is bitlockered you’ll need to go to http://ift.tt/2dehOSV on another machine or your phone and find your computer’s Recovery Key. You’ll enter this as you press Troubleshoot and it will allow you to access your now-unencrypted drive from the command prompt.

At this point all your drive letters may be weird. Take a moment and look around. Your USB key may be X: or Z:. Your C: drive may be D: or E:.

2. Do you have an earlier version of volsnap.sys? Find it.

If you’ve been taking Windows Insiders Builds/Flights, you may have a C:\Windows.old folder. Remembering to be conscious of your drive letters, you want to rename the bad volsnap and copy in the old one from elsewhere. In this example, I get it from C:\Windows.old.

ren C:\windows\system32\drivers\volsnap.sys C:\windows\system32\drivers\volsnap.sys.bak copy C:\windows.old\windows\system32\drivers\volsnap.sys C:\windows\system32\drivers\volsnap.sys

Unfortunately, *I* didn’t have a C:\windows.old folder as I used Disk Cleanup to get more space. I found a good volsnap.sys from another machine in my house and copied it to the root of the USB key I booted off up. In that case my copy command was different as I copied from my USB key to c:\windows\system32\drivers, but the GOAL was the same – get a good volsnap.sys.

Once I resolved my boot issue, I went to Windows Update and am now updating to 17025.

PLEASE, friends – BACK UP YOUR STUFF. Remember the Backup Rule of Three.

Here’s the rule of three. It’s a long time computer-person rule of thumb that you can apply to your life now. It’s also called the Backup 3-2-1 rule.

3 copies of anything you care about – Two isn’t enough if it’s important.

2 different formats – Example: Dropbox+DVDs or Hard Drive+Memory Stick or CD+Crash Plan, or more

1 off-site backup – If the house burns down, how will you get your memories back?

Beta testing will cost you some time, and system crashes happen. But are they a nightmare data loss scenario or are they an irritant. For me this was a scary “can’t boot” scenario, but I had another machine and my stuff was backed up.

Don’t take beta builds of anything on your primary machine that you care about and that makes you money.

DISCLAIMER: I love you but this blog post has NO warranty. I have no idea what I’m doing and if this makes your non-bootable beta software machine even worse, that’s on you, Dear Reader.

Sponsor: Check out JetBrains Rider: a new cross-platform .NET IDE. Edit, refactor, test and debug ASP.NET, .NET Framework, .NET Core, Xamarin or Unity applications. Learn more and download a 30-day trial!

© 2017 Scott Hanselman. All rights reserved.

      Recovering from the Windows 10 Insiders Fast 17017 volsnap.sys reboot GSOD/BSOD syndicated from http://ift.tt/2wBRU5Z