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#use the material better than you're willing to be
sophiamcdougall · 9 months
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You're a reasonably informed person on the internet. You've experienced things like no longer being able to get files off an old storage device, media you've downloaded suddenly going poof, sites and forums with troves full of people's thoughts and ideas vanishing forever. You've heard of cybercrime. You've read articles about lost media. You have at least a basic understanding that digital data is vulnerable, is what I'm saying. I'm guessing that you're also aware that history is, you know... important? And that it's an ongoing study, requiring ... data about how people live? And that it's not just about stanning celebrities that happen to be dead? Congratulations, you are significantly better-informed than the British government! So they're currently like "Oh hai can we destroy all these historical documents pls? To save money? Because we'll digitise them first so it's fine! That'll be easy, cheap and reliable -- right? These wills from the 1850s will totally be fine for another 170 years as a PNG or whatever, yeah? We didn't need to do an impact assesment about this because it's clearly win-win! We'd keep the physical wills of Famous People™ though because Famous People™ actually matter, unlike you plebs. We don't think there are any equalities implications about this, either! Also the only examples of Famous People™ we can think of are all white and rich, only one is a woman and she got famous because of the guy she married. Kisses!"
Yes, this is the same Government that's like "Oh no removing a statue of slave trader is erasing history :(" You have, however, until 23 February 2024 to politely inquire of them what the fuck they are smoking. And they will have to publish a summary of the responses they receive. And it will look kind of bad if the feedback is well-argued, informative and overwhelmingly negative and they go ahead and do it anyway. I currently edit documents including responses to consultations like (but significantly less insane) than this one. Responses do actually matter. I would particularly encourage British people/people based in the UK to do this, but as far as I can see it doesn't say you have to be either. If you are, say, a historian or an archivist, or someone who specialises in digital data do say so and draw on your expertise in your answers. This isn't a question of filling out a form. You have to manually compose an email answering the 12 questions in the consultation paper at the link above. I'll put my own answers under the fold. Note -- I never know if I'm being too rude in these sorts of things. You probably shouldn't be ruder than I have been.
Please do not copy and paste any of this: that would defeat the purpose. This isn't a petition, they need to see a range of individual responses. But it may give you a jumping-off point.
Question 1: Should the current law providing for the inspection of wills be preserved?
Yes. Our ability to understand our shared past is a fundamental aspect of our heritage. It is not possible for any authority to know in advance what future insights they are supporting or impeding by their treatment of material evidence. Safeguarding the historical record for future generations should be considered an extremely important duty.
Question 2: Are there any reforms you would suggest to the current law enabling wills to be inspected?
No.
Question 3: Are there any reasons why the High Court should store original paper will documents on a permanent basis, as opposed to just retaining a digitised copy of that material?
Yes. I am amazed that the recent cyber attack on the British Library, which has effectively paralysed it completely, not been sufficient to answer this question for you.  I also refer you to the fate of the Domesday Project. Digital storage is useful and can help more people access information; however, it is also inherently fragile. Malice, accident, or eventual inevitable obsolescence not merely might occur, but absolutely should be expected. It is ludicrously naive and reflects a truly unpardonable ignorance to assume that information preserved only in digital form is somehow inviolable and safe, or that a physical document once digitised, never need be digitised again..At absolute minimum, it should be understood as certain that at least some of any digital-only archive will eventually be permanently lost. It is not remotely implausible that all of it would be. Preserving the physical documents provides a crucial failsafe. It also allows any errors in reproduction -- also inevitable-- to be, eventually, seen and corrected. Note that maintaining, upgrading and replacing digital infrastructure is not free, easy or reliable. Over the long term, risks to the data concerned can only accumulate.
"Unlike the methods for preserving analog documents that have been honed over millennia, there is no deep precedence to look to regarding the management of digital records. As such, the processing, long-term storage, and distribution potential of archival digital data are highly unresolved issues. [..] the more digital data is migrated, translated, and re-compressed into new formats, the more room there is for information to be lost, be it at the microbit-level of preservation. Any failure to contend with the instability of digital storage mediums, hardware obsolescence, and software obsolescence thus meets a terminal end—the definitive loss of information. The common belief that digital data is safe so long as it is backed up according to the 3-2-1 rule (3 copies on 2 different formats with 1 copy saved off site) belies the fact that it is fundamentally unclear how long digital information can or will remain intact. What is certain is that its unique vulnerabilities do become more pertinent with age."  -- James Boyda, On Loss in the 21st Century: Digital Decay and the Archive, Introduction.
Question 4: Do you agree that after a certain time original paper documents (from 1858 onwards) may be destroyed (other than for famous individuals)? Are there any alternatives, involving the public or private sector, you can suggest to their being destroyed?
Absolutely not. And I would have hoped we were past the "great man" theory of history. Firstly, you do not know which figures will still be considered "famous" in the future and which currently obscure individuals may deserve and eventually receive greater attention. I note that of the three figures you mention here as notable enough to have their wills preserved, all are white, the majority are male (the one woman having achieved fame through marriage) and all were wealthy at the time of their death. Any such approach will certainly cull evidence of the lives of women, people of colour and the poor from the historical record, and send a clear message about whose lives you consider worth remembering.
Secondly, the famous and successsful are only a small part of our history. Understanding the realities that shaped our past and continue to mould our present requires evidence of the lives of so-called "ordinary people"!
Did you even speak to any historians before coming up with this idea?
Entrusting the documents to the private sector would be similarly disastrous. What happens when a private company goes bust or decides that preserving this material is no longer profitable? What reasonable person, confronted with our crumbling privatised water infrastructure, would willingly consign any part of our heritage to a similar fate?
Question 5: Do you agree that there is equivalence between paper and digital copies of wills so that the ECA 2000 can be used?
No. And it raises serious questions about the skill and knowledge base within HMCTS and the government that the very basic concepts of data loss and the digital dark age appear to be unknown to you. I also refer you to the Domesday Project.
Question 6: Are there any other matters directly related to the retention of digital or paper wills that are not covered by the proposed exercise of the powers in the ECA 2000 that you consider are necessary?
Destroying the physical documents will always be an unforgivable dereliction of legal and moral duty.
Question 7: If the Government pursues preserving permanently only a digital copy of a will document, should it seek to reform the primary legislation by introducing a Bill or do so under the ECA 2000?
Destroying the physical documents will always be an unforgivable dereliction of legal and moral duty.
Question 8: If the Government moves to digital only copies of original will documents, what do you think the retention period for the original paper wills should be? Please give reasons and state what you believe the minimum retention period should be and whether you consider the Government’s suggestion of 25 years to be reasonable.
There is no good version of this plan. The physical documents should be preserved.
Question 9: Do you agree with the principle that wills of famous people should be preserved in the original paper form for historic interest?
This question betrays deep ignorance of what "historic interest" actually is. The study of history is not simply glorified celebrity gossip. If anything, the physical wills of currently famous people could be considered more expendable as it is likely that their contents are so widely diffused as to be relatively "safe", whereas the wills of so-called "ordinary people" will, especially in aggregate, provide insights that have not yet been explored.
Question 10: Do you have any initial suggestions on the criteria which should be adopted for identifying famous/historic figures whose original paper will document should be preserved permanently?
Abandon this entire lamentable plan. As previously discussed, you do not and cannot know who will be considered "famous" in the future, and fame is a profoundly flawed criterion of historical significance.
Question 11: Do you agree that the Probate Registries should only permanently retain wills and codicils from the documents submitted in support of a probate application? Please explain, if setting out the case for retention of any other documents.
No, all the documents should be preserved indefinitely.
Question 12: Do you agree that we have correctly identified the range and extent of the equalities impacts under each of these proposals set out in this consultation? Please give reasons and supply evidence of further equalities impacts as appropriate.
No. You appear to have neglected equalities impacts entirely. As discussed, in your drive to prioritise "famous people", your plan will certainly prioritise the white, wealthy and mostly the male, as your "Charles Dickens, Charles Darwin and Princess Diana" examples amply indicate. This plan will create a two-tier system where evidence of the lives of the privileged is carefully preserved while information regarding people of colour, women, the working class and other disadvantaged groups is disproportionately abandoned to digital decay and eventual loss. Current and future historians from, or specialising in the history of minority groups will be especially impoverished by this.  
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worriedvision · 23 days
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oh my godddddddddddds im backk its 🌙
maybe someting where kinich and the reader are dating and jealous of mualani for something he did to help her that he never does for reader?
Okay so in this idea I've made reader a weapons dealer (why tf can't I remember the name of the profession smh?) and Ajaw gives you some useful advice.
Part of this fic has headcanons not really linked to the character, but more to the fic idea.
--
Your boyfriend was not the best at keeping his weapon safe - that much that you landed up knowing him through his visits to your stand, asking with a hint of embarrassment added in every time he made yet another visit to your shop for another claymore. Over time, you had grown fond of him, and you asked him out.
Surprisingly, he said yes.
When you hang out, which was rare because of his line of work, you told him more about yourself than he was willing to tell you. At first you thought he was just getting more familiar with you, but after a while you get wary. You had given him a decent discount for weapons - basically free whenever he needed once since you begin dating.
But then you saw how he interacted with her. Mualani.
She effortlessly got him to talk, and you really didn't like the feeling in your chest when you saw them together, and Ajaw seemed bored whenever they were together. Ajaw would get put into time out regularly whenever he said too much, which happened whenever Kinich was being teased about how close he seemed to be to Mualani in comparison to you - his actual partner.
The last time he got put into time out, Ajaw manage dto get to you discretely. No idea how exactly, but you weren't about to ask questions.
"You're better moving on, _." Ajaw states. "You and I both know he's taking advantage of your deal."
"...My deal?" You ask, tilting your head.
You hadn't thought too hard about how often he seemed to visit your shop after you two became a couple, but it made sense how often he visited. He didn't even show shame with it after you both started dating, he seemed to think this was his side of the bargain as opposed to just being Happy about dating you.
"...Are you listening to me?" Ajaw yells, catching your attention. "It looks like you already know what I'm going to say. I'm stuck with Kinich, doesn't mean you have to be!" Ajaw cackles, sunglasses on.
"Thanks, Ajaw." You rub the back of your head awkwardly as you look over at Kinich who has now been hugged by Mualani. He never pushes her away, not did he seem uncomfortable with her hugs, which was the final nail in the coffin as he never wanted to get your affections.
Kinich walks over, pointing towards a Claymore as he asks for a price. When you give him the usual customer price, he shows confusion.
"What?" You ask innocently. "I can't keep giving you discounts when you keep losing merchandise. It costs materials, time and money to make these."
"Fair enough, sorry." Kinich smiles softly, an action you had only seen from him when he had spoken to Mualani. He places the mora on the table, you hand the weapon over, and he doesn't even wave as he leaves.
Mualani waves at you, cheery smile on her face, and you do the most pathetic wave before having to excuse yourself as you realised you fell for a guy that had only wanted you for your weapons at a cheaper price.
You realise that, in Kinich's eyes, you were nothing but a side character.
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hardknifeplays · 3 months
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'*•.¸♡ relationship with könig: headcanons ♡¸.•*'
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tags: gn!reader x könig, he's older than you, mostly domestic, nsfw-ish!
NOTE: Please do NOT repost anywhere | reblog, likes, and comments are appreciated! ♡
✧ the beginning of the relationship was a bit difficult, he was so used to the hard and rough military life. knowing he has a higher rank in his team, he treated you like you're his subordinates, not his partner.
✧ he was too commanding until you snapped and brought him back to reality one day. you told him that when he's with you he's not supposed to act and/or treat you the way he treats his soldiers in the field.
✧ that was the first time he saw you snapping at him, and it scared the life out of him. he never thought someone whose figure was so small compared to him could be THAT fiery and going against him.
✧ he was a bit pushy and almost always forced you to do whatever he suggested (about anything, really), and let's say he was not on his best behavior back then. you realized you shouldn't let a man step on you like this, especially when you're his partner.
✧ you dared yourself to be more vocal and direct to him. it worked; you told him where he was wrong and how you wanted him to improve next time. sure, he still made some slip-ups but he definitely got better.
✧ he told you he was sorry for the way he treated you, he was never good with communication. he never wanted to be mean to you, and you saw major changes within him from that point.
✧ he started to show his gentle and clingy side, you almost forgot that this is the same man who was a little too stern to you a few months ago.
✧ morning sex is a MUST, inhaling your natural scent from behind while his hips are drilling against your ass is the best way to start a morning.
✧ his love language is eating together with you. either eating some meals made by you, made by him, or even take-outs, he always wants to eat with you. if you're not hungry? well, he can tell his stomach to hold the hunger a bit just for you.
✧ this man LOVES dirty jokes and puns you throw at him. always get him all flustered and red like a fucking tomato. run your mouth, sweetheart, this Austrian giant is head over heels for you even more! ;)
✧ he's becoming more and more vocal and open about his feelings and thoughts to you, despite feeling extra anxious whenever he did so. soon he realized that you're here to listen to him, and not to judge him.
✧ the most romantic moments happens after work, you're serving him a cup of coffee or tea while he's resting himself on the dinner table. you two will spend the rest of the evening talking about your day, his day, and sometimes some gossips in your or his office. drinking tea while spilling some tea, if you will. 🍵
✧ the man is a massive science nerd 😅 he's subscribing to youtube channels like michael reeves, kurzgesagt, and NileRed. he'd love to watch science documentaries with you until both of you fall asleep.
✧ he loves it when you rely on him. need some new, exclusive collector edition books? he's here to pay, even the hardcover ones! need new lipstick or makeup? take him to sephora and make yourself pretty with his cash, darling. need new PC components? he'll spoil you and make you an amazing PC setup!
✧ besides the material things, he loves you even more when you cling to him like a baby koala when you're anxious or feeling unsafe in general. he loves being a big man for his dearest love.
✧ he's quite busy, and his line of work is highly demanding for his presence. he's a colonel, leading missions and he even goes to his office or shooting range on weekends or holidays. his hard work paid off, and he kept being promoted to higher positions.
✧ loves it when you asks him about his job. what is he doing? what is a “human battering ram”? he's willing to answer some grime questions from you, e.g. is he becoming insensitive to see gruesome death? is human blood really THAT red and fresh? is he afraid of the ghosts of the enemies he had killed? etc.
✧ sometimes he comes home looking frustrated, and it scares you a bit. worried that he'd back to his old self, the overly stern and authoritarian asshole. but then you know that his frustration is not directed at you, but rather to whoever the hell managed to piss him off at the office.
✧ you can soothe him in two ways: calm him down by talking him out through it and bathe him (unless he requests some alone time to sort his thoughts), or being his obedient fucktoy for him to release all that pent-up anger. you choose :)
✧ he'd consume you whole if he sees you with bodycon dress or any tight clothing. it turns him into an animal.
✧ always asks for pictures whenever you're away from him. say things like, "i want to see how well your dress/shirt is hugging your figure, love." ; "you'd look gorgeous with that makeup/style."
✧ plenty of nicknames for you: feisty firecracker, honeybee, sweetface, schnucki (means 'sweetie' in german), schatz, Schmetterling (butterfly), my love, my darling, my dearest angel, my sweet, ... etc.
✧ if you happen to be someone from outside of german speaking country, he'd teach you some german. mostly curses and dirty words, though. hehe.
✧ he'd love to bring you to his hometown in salzburg. he'd take you to makartsteg (lovers lock) bridge and seeing the mountains, and he's so excited to introduce you to local foods and drinks.
✧ he'd love to be your biggest motivator whenever you feel lazy to do something. got some homework or tasks you need to finish, but didn't want to? he'd say, "do it and I'll reward you in the bedroom, schatzi."
✧ if you two are already talking about marriage... he'd be so nervous about meeting your parents, especially if you have extremely different cultures as him. he's a grown man with a great income that surely can sustain you two, which you're sure that your parents wouldn't mind about.
✧ his biggest concern about starting a family with you is your safety, knowing how often he's deployed. being one of the best operators in his team meant he'd constantly be called to missions, sometimes to a region or country that you'd never heard of before. he always tell you to pray for him, so he can come back to you alive AND intact.
✧ he wants three kids. and if that's too much for you, he won't complain either. he just thinks that three is a sweet spot for him.
hehe that's it! hope you enjoy this as much as i do.
━ sincerely, hardknifeplays.
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lilacstro · 3 months
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What could end your relationship through your Venus sign
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On the suggestions of @crystalsnshit and @majortomspacex under my post astro observation pt 6 I will be making this post :)
support me on ko-fi :)
How do we find this?
Count the 8th sign and house from your Venus placement and you should know how you could possibly be sabotaging your relationships. How do we do this?
Lets say you have a Sag Venus in 12th house, 8 houses, and 8 signs from there would be, Cancer and 7th house.
You should now be able to find this. Remember, it resonated for me, and people I did readings for. If this does not resonate with you, its ok :)
Combine both of these to be able to look into it :) I will however mention the Venus signs for each of them.
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1st house/Aries (Venus in Virgo) Looking at your relationships from a self centered pov, in the sense, looking at things for what suits you, more than what could be better for both of you together, not making sacrifices or compromises your relationship might need. Feeling insecure about yourself/partner. Trying to fit things to fit your future or at the extreme opposite being giving to a fault, that you dont even realize but you are doing everything in a relationship for 2, all by yourself. Getting fierce. Starting to fast just to go crashing down, not being able to take things slow.
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2nd house/Taurus (Venus in Libra) Not willing to change opinions, or thoughts about something. In the sense let's say, someone made a mistake and you may keep bringing it up over and over, still carrying resentment for it. Maybe you remember your partner as someone who used to wake up at 5 AM (just a random example lol) and now they dont, it might be hard for you to let go of old versions. Not willing to change old ways, not leaving/pointing things out and getting too comfortable. Could be getting caught up in the "show" (material wealth) at times.
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3rd house/Gemini (Venus in Scorpio) Not being aware of what you're speaking and what you're delivering instead. Maybe passive aggressive/argumentative. Getting sarcastic. Not being able to experience "boredom" and wanting something to happen all the time. Being confused about what you really want. Not taking thing seriously when you probably should. Communication gap. Maybe thinking you/your person have too many choices. Trying to act the "unbothered" king/queen, you are not.
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4th house/Cancer (Venus in Sagittarius) Attachment issues. Saying/taking actions high on emotions. Emotional instability. Some kind of attachment to nostalgia and how it used to be, which makes it hard for you to see that the person isnt the same anymore and you are probably in love with an old version of them that doesn't exist anymore. Tolerating/Giving silent treatment or isolating yourself within the relationship. Withdrawing. Trying to solve things alone for what should be solved together. Probably wanting to leave all the time but not doing so (attachment issues again). falling into the traps of innocence.
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5th house/Leo (Venus in Capricorn) Wanting to be someone's 1st priority on a seemingly impossible level. Not being able to tolerate/express things normally and making it a big deal unknowingly. Getting bored when things seem normal. Could be feeling competitive to your own partner in some ways without realizing, hence building resentment. Anger management issues. Problems differentiating what is happening, and what am I feeling and what is actually real between both of them. Getting bossy at times probably without even realizing. Hyper independence issues at times. Wanting to show your partner off, but making them fit into something they probably aren't for the show.
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6th house/Virgo (Venus in Aquarius) Trying to make meaning out of everything, being overcritical and judgmental of things. Trying to take every little thing seriously, getting hurt over small things. Getting used to how things should be "in a certain way" and not understanding sometimes, things aren't actually exactly like plan and order all the time. Picking small fights over things that weren't really important at times. Building frustration/insecurity under the surface. Being available/at service all times, to an unhealthy level.
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7th house/Libra (Venus in Pisces) Probably being caught up sometimes in thoughts of "can i do better than this?", "i wonder what they think about my person". Getting caught up in the idea of status/reputation, forgetting that the real important thing is you being contended with your partner and not anyone else. Having this urge/thoughts that "am i settling for the less? should i see if i can do better. Comparing your relationship and your person and getting disappointed for bad reasons. Constantly wanting to choose/being indecisive over what you really want making your partner feel undervalued/underappreciated at times.
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8th house/Scorpio (Venus in Aries) Overthinking. Being too attached to someone on a toxic level sometimes. Not opening up about your feelings and expectations and even worse, expecting that to be understood somehow without making it clear and feeling not understood/important when that does not happen and building resentment otherwise. Passive aggressive feelings. Feeling everything too deeply but being unable to talk about it. Fear of things being over so you just decide in your head let's end it already anyways, or you make subconscious choices like that without even realizing. Unwilling to let go/open up about past. Sometimes bearing things to an unhealthy level just for things to stay. Getting overly passionate that you even get blindsided.
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9th house/Sagittarius (Venus in Taurus) Rose coloured glasses. Being optimistic about things when you actually should let go/discuss them clearly. Being on the surface, and feeling scared to dive deeper into the feels. Being afraid to feel your own feelings when you are uncomfortable about them. Projection problems. Going, "Oh i don't care" about things when you should probably discuss them. Problems confronting/being confronted. And again, when opening up, getting straight to the throat about things you have been wanting talk about. Sometimes thinking "oh i am just serving the truth" and "they/i can leave, doesnt quite matter" when it absolutely does but you just don't know yet. Wanting to leave/make decisions impulsively at every small discomfort.
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10th house/Capricorn (Venus in Gemini) Overthinking things to a fault. Building a plan and expectation of how it should go and having problems when it doesn't quite go like that. Probably, embarrassment over your partners at times. Expecting them to act/behave in some certain way at times? not too sure about this one. Probably picking problems in your partner to a fault because you expect/want them to be perfect. This might come from a place of care, but this can actually get annoying at times making someone feel they aren't appreciated/enough for who they already are. Getting obsessive in a controlling way. Not giving enough thought to someone/someone's feelings and getting caught up at unnecessary places.
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11th house/Aquarius (Venus in Cancer) Having no control over your thoughts and feelings regarding the other person. Maybe feeling one day you love them to moons but suddenly feeling you lost feelings the other day. Not being able to differentiate between what is your mood and your real feelings. Making sudden decisions about things, possibly at times without even needing to inform the other. Thinking you are being "nice, and kind and giving or sacrificing" by taking such decisions (probably thinking that if you ghost someone, even if it hurts you, you are doing them favor because they deserve better so technically you are the one in pain, even though you are making a dumb decision) but all while just hurting the other person to ends.
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12th house/Pisces (Venus in Leo) Over idealizing your partner and then getting upset when it doesn't happen that way. Feeling disappointed. Having made up thoughts and delusions about something that doesn't probably exist, in both good and bad ways, hence being unable to see what actually is real. At times, this could also lead to misunderstandings at times. Making assumptions and not caring enough to clarify them. At times, ignoring what is real and problematic/makes you visibly uncomfortable just to have peace and your relationship, and getting crushed when in the end, the inevitable happens anyways.
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I hope you resonated with this post, leave feedback/suggestions <33
i love you all
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howtofightwrite · 6 months
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Have you read GRRM books? He claims swords needed to be “especially designed for women’s hands” how true is this?
About as true as all of those, “girl guns.” Because, as you know, a woman cannot hold a Glock unless it's pink or sky blue. Which is to say, not even remotely true.
You might get a situation where a child would be unable to operate a weapon designed for adults because the grip is too cumbersome, but even this is going to be something of an outlier. Even years later the Nicholas Cage's line from Lord of War (2005) sticks with me, when describing the AK he narrates, “...so simple a child could use it, and they do.”
Just like basically any other common grip you encounter in your daily life, from screwdrivers to steering-wheels and cell phones, selling smaller, or more colorful ones, is strictly a marketing gimick.
Now, is a legitimate context, but it doesn't really have anything to do with the wielder's sex. If they had the money, the time, and the desire for a perfect grip, they might commission a smith to produce a grip specifically for their hand. Though, the only place I've ever come across this was in competitive fencing. I have seen cases where someone modifies their blade's grip with tape or other materials to better fit their hand, or the addition of a leather (usually shagreen) wrap over their grip, but even that is somewhat unusual. (Shagreen is leather from a shark or ray, and it grips the skin, making it easier to hold, especially when wet.)
Ironically, girl guns do illustrate the one case where have some weight: Weapons as fashion accessories.
I know I've complained about weapons (particularly handguns) as fashion accessories in previous posts, but the truth is that using weapons like this is not new behavior. In the early modern era, one of the ways the rising middle class liked to display their status was with a sidearm. (In this case, referring to a sidesword or, later, a rapier.) I've looked specifically into women carrying sidearms at that point in history, but it really would not surprise me in the least if they did, and if there were, that at least some of those swords were specifically designed to be more delicate and, “feminine,” per their owner's tastes. (Though, to be fair, a more delicate grip on a rapier would be fairly impressive, as the grips tend to be pretty thin.) This is a case where you might want to look into it further, if it really catches your interest, but I've never really run this down before.
If you're still dubious, feel free to wander into nearly any HEMA event, and you'll have a better than average chance of a woman being willing to prove this idea false with a Zweihander, that may in fact be taller than she is. (Historically, Zwiehanders could be over 2 meters long, and chances extremely good that you're shorter than 2 meters.)
I know I'm regurgitating previous posts here, but it really is worth remembering that swords are much lighter than people think. Zweihanders are some of the heaviest battlefield swords from history, and even the heaviest examples weigh less than 9lbs. Women in HEMA can, and do, use them effectively. Swords aren't about being big and heavy, they're about being a (in this case) seven foot long razor blade.
Since we're on the Zweihander specifically (and this may also apply for some of the other greatswords, such as the Scottish Claymore), this is a case where you might have a custom weapon forged for you. However, in this case, that's more about the right blade length, then worrying about the grip being too thick or too thin. Ideally, you want the blade length to match your height (roughly), this is because of the drills with the weapon itself, though you could adjust to a longer blade if that's what you had.
Now, to be clear, the idea of someone, particularly a noble, having a blade custom forged for them specifically isn't strange. That's something that did happen, both at the noble's request, and also as diplomatic gifts from other nations. Examples of the latter resulted in beautiful art pieces that you would never take into battle.
If you had a situation where you couldn't use a sword because the grip was too large (for, whatever reason), there are ways to fix that. In an ideal situation, you could simply pop off the pommel and grip, and then replace the grip with one that was a better fit to your hand. If the tang itself was the problem (this is the metal core of the grip, and is part of the blade, which the pommel attaches to), you might be able to shave (or file) down the tang, and then replace the grip with a new one, fitted to the now smaller tang. I'm not particularly wild about modifying the tang directly, simply because there is a (minor) risk of reducing the structural integrity of the sword in the process. Though, replacing the grip (especially on a sword with a threaded pommel) is very doable, and unless someone, somehow, screws up catastrophically, it should be a pretty trivial modification. (Again, replacing a sword's original grip with a new shagreen grip does make a lot of sense if the owner wants that improved grip.)
But, to the original question, it's not really a thing.
-Starke
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murdrdocs · 10 months
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oh wally clark would take so much pride in his little cheerleader gf wearing his letterman jacket everywhere
oh absolutely.
you're in your devil's uniform, the blue complimenting your skin tone perfectly, the cheerleader uniform hugging you in all the right places. and wally already thinks you look fucking phenomenal. but there’s one thing missing.
he tells you as such, leaning against your locker as he eyes you up and down, pretending to be looking for something when he knows exactly what it is. at first, you're adamant that you have everything you need, even turning your head to show the ‘57’ painted on your cheek.
but wally shakes his head, pouting as he squints. “no. there’s definitely something.”
you even go as far as to look at the mirror in your locker, but when you turn back to wally, he has his letterman jacket open for you to slip your arms into and you rolls her eyes.
“i thought i actually forgot something, wally,” you confess as you slip into the jacket, instantly snuggling into the too-big material. “you’re a jerk.”
wally turns you around with hands on your shoulders, using his grip to pull you closer. he presses his hands to your middle back, pulling you even closer until your chest touches his, and then he smiles down at you, big and cheeky. “but i’m your jerk.”
you pretend to be upset but you're still the one who initiates the kiss.
and for the rest of the day, wally ogles at the sight of you in the jacket. you wear it better than him, especially paired with the cheer uniform and the bow in your hair.
by the end of the day, he stares at you again, now warranted as you're talking to him about a new movie you two should go see, but he realizes that something is missing this time. all you need is the gold necklace wally wears 24/7, another thing of his he’s willing to share with the girl he loves.
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ravencantwrite · 16 days
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Small things that Logan does for you
Logan x Chronically ill! Reader
Warnings: nothing really, just a lil fluffy hehe
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Carries your bag for you
You are used to carrying your bag around with you after all it had almost everything you'd need— meds, pain relief patches, first aid material, or any other things that you'd need. But sometimes it does become a headache to take it everywhere. Holding on to your bag, or carrying your stuff around in a sling isn't really the most comfortable spot to be in really, considering the weight of the bag after everything you have to carry.
So when you try to pack less stuff than you usually do, Logan notices and immediately asks you if you don't need them anymore. "It's not that I don't need them, I'm just trying to take what I think I won't need today so that my bag won't be heavy", you tell him. He knows that your symptoms sometimes worsen suddenly and he is not willing to take the chance of going out with you and you not having everything that you need to help yourself.
"Pack everything that you need. Don't worry about how heavy it's going to be, I'll carry it for you", he tells you. And so he walks around with a little brown bag which obviously looks stuffed, hanging over his shoulders with a smile on his face, content at the fact that he was able to help you.
He packs your umbrella for you
Sometimes you tend to forget that your joints somehow predict the weather better than the weather report does. So when they start aching at first you blame it on overworking yourself, sleeping wrong, or anything else you can think of at the moment. The thought of the humidity in the air actually being the reason for your joint pain doesn't really occur to you.
It's only when you look out of the window from the class you were teaching at in the X Mansion that you see the grey clouds growing over the buildings, covering what was once a clear blue sky, that you realise the real cause of your joint pain. Your phone rings and it's Logan on the other end.
"Is it raining there yet? Because if it is, I packed your umbrella in your bag. Don't take too long and come back home after your shift."
He would always protect you in crowds
You can't always void crowds although you wish you could. People pushing against you, almost knocking you down accidentally wasn't really something that you look forward to. So when you're in a particularly very crowded elevator with Logan he makes sure to stand in a way that would let you have your space and would keep other people at a respectable distance so that when they move in or out of the elevator they don't accidentally hit you.
He would always try to get you to the side of the elevator so that you could hold onto the handrail and get that extra support that you would need while standing. And if that isn't enough, he would place his hand on your back, supporting you.
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wombywoo · 5 months
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Hello!!
I wanted to ask if you would be willing to share how you go about finding the references for the injuries you depict in your work? Your pieces where the CoD boys are sporting injuries, fresh and old, are always so lifelike and to my untrained eye seem entirely medically correct.
I have been trying my hand at drawing the boys retired and resting as well, but I’m finding it difficult to decide what work injuries to add and how to find the respective references.
How do you decide what injuries to portray? And how do you go about finding the reference material?
Your huge fan, amustikas
Oooh ok ok! I'm gonna post my answer publically because I think others would find this interesting too!
To preface, I am definitely NOT a medical professional, and as such, a lot of the stuff I choose to depict in my art is not so much..ah, medically accurate as it is....aesthetically pleasing 🤭
I'll start with scars, as a lot of us enjoy slashing up Simon's face with them, lol. Generally, I'll do a cursory google image search for the type of scar I'm looking for (be warned, these can be graphic) with searches like 'burn scar' 'surgery scar' etc. But I find that for things like cuts and lacerations, real-life scars are a bit innocuous and lame 🤷‍♀️ Unfortunately not everyone's skin wants to retain that perfect slash look™️😔
So what I usually end up referencing are costume prosthetic scars ✨
As you can see, they're pretty gnarly:
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And you definitely don't have to go this intense, but I find that the dramatic, carved-like appearance of these translate better to art than a realistically healed wound 🤙
The other thing to consider is the prevalence of injuries in the military. From what I've gathered, the most common will be back/shoulder/limb injuries, just a general fucking up of the whole musculoskeletal system in general due to constant overuse 🤕 Hearing loss, shrapnel/blast/burn injuries are also common, as well as all the negative psychological effects :') goooood times (not)
I think it's neat to look up real-life examples of these things, but it can get a bit intense if you're squeamish...
SafeSearch is OFF, the horrors are REal 😳
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So yeah...I tend to tone things down, all things considered...😅
For this particular piece:
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I researched broken humerus injuries and treatment 👍 Poor boy 🥺(Yes, I am aware that I consumed entire articles and did a shit ton of research about this just to go ahead and put a female's x-ray in this fucking picture sdfghjkl rip💀😭)
But here you can see the actual process for applying the brace for this particular injury:
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Neat, eh?
When I draw Johnny with a knee brace, it's usually a real authentic one you can buy on amazon:
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Product placement blast!!!💥✨ Bezos, where is my cut?? 🫰
As for ones like this:
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I tend to just...scatter some wounds around and patch them up accordingly, lol. Bruising around the eyes is common with any head injury, and surgical stitching will offer a nice puckered skin effect mmm 👌 (I swear I'm normal abt this)
I'm sure the medical malpractice lawsuits are stacking up for me now, but again--it's usually more about the ✨visuals✨
My parting advice would be--go nuts! Feel free to maim and mutilate and mangle to your heart's content 🥰
Thank you for the question, Amustikas! I love your art as well 💗🫶
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fictionalslvr · 11 months
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SYNOPSIS: The farmer who's growing head over heels for you.
PAIRING: Farmer¡Simon Riley x F¡Reader
WORD COUNT: 1.128k
WARNINGS: NSFW/SMUT, literally porn written down. Simon is a pervert man. Older¡Simon. Stealing panties. Cumming in your stealed panties. Dacryphilia.Kinda creepy man, ect. Not proofreaded!
NOTES: I'm just OBSESSED with Farmer¡Simon and might explore him better in a most detailed work.•́⁠ ⁠ ⁠‿⁠ ⁠,⁠•̀
RUMINATE: (v.) To think deeply about something.
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Farmer¡Simon, who's renting a ranch for a good old fashioned family, who is sweet and gentle to everyone quickly as they get there.
Farmer¡Simon, who's informed that the family has a daughter, the only daughter of the couple and who's their pride. Once she got there, he could see the reason behind it.
Farmer¡Simon, with his body flaming under the sun, a lot of drops of sweat coming down from his forehead and doing a path in between his hairy chest. He can't bear the heat anymore, and grunts under his breath, pulling his shirt to the top of his head, letting it rest on his shoulders.
Farmer¡Simon, who feels a dedicated pair of fingertips touching his back on that scorching sun and turns to see a perfect young lady, asking for information and immediately making the corners of his lips turn into a smirk. The sun was not a problem, not when he has an eye drop as you are.
Farmer¡Simon, after finding out you're the new couple's daughter, is way more willing to show you around than every other person around.
Farmer¡Simon, who never thought that such an elegant lady could catch his attention so quickly. He's a mess of sweat and not elegant at the minimum of his persona, why would you even listen to him?
Farmer¡Simon, who's always bragging about being hot, but that suddenly becomes more insecure about his dad body. That's all because you're younger than him, you wouldn't want a man with a body like his.
Farmer¡Simon, that has a good pair of strong arms that carried trunks, metals and any other heavy materials you could think of.
Farmer¡Simon, who has hair all over his body, not even caring about shaving them because he thinks he's too "masculine" to do so. Nor he wants to shave them.
Farmer¡Simon, who's hair is greasy at the end of the day, after so much work he does all day at the ranch. The last thing he does is sprays his legs at the little table and reads the newspaper, eventually falling asleep on the couch that way.
Farmer¡Simon, who finds out you're staying for one month to visit your parents and is smiling from the inside out. The usually grumpy man is more receptive than he wants to admit it next to you.
Farmer¡Simon, that sees you riding on a horse from the window of his house and can't help but stop everything he's doing to watch closely. He leans his forearms on the window frame and just licks his own lips, making them moist as his eyes are glued on you, like you're his prey and he's ready to attack.
Farmer¡Simon, who's growing more and more pervert as he sees you often. The bare sight of you makes his mind run per miles and he can't really stop those thoughts.
Farmer¡Simon that can't help but be worried about the slight things he never worried about before. Like his usual masculine smell, all covered in sweat and stinking like a drunken leaving a saloon. But when he sees you, he immediately runs to a cold quick bath, even worrying more about perfume too, that he used to think it was "bullshit" if he's "going to get dirty anyways at the end of the day."
Farmer¡Simon, that is not the most clean man ever, but that will try to be unconsciously because you're the most graceful and sophisticated woman he ever saw and deep inside, wants to impress you.
Farmer¡Simon, who was once told by you, that you liked his natural scent. Since you're a clever lady, you noticed he's been using more perfume than when you met him.
Farmer¡Simon, who doesn't care about using perfumes anymore after what you said. And he's thankful for that, because he can't bear that strong scent on his nostrils.
Farmer¡Simon, that is getting bolder and bolder each moment you two share. He got a new habit that he's not proud of, but that helps him a lot.
Farmer¡Simon, who's been stealing your cute little rosy laced panties to have material to jerk off with. Visiting your parents way more to "discuss with your father", when he sneaks into your room and his hands "unconsciously" find his way to your panties drawer.
Farmer¡Simon, that in the deep pit of the night, with the company of himself and the longitude sounds of the crickets and the water of the lake closer, that is hard because of you.
Farmer¡Simon, who's hands traveled down to his crotch and without noticing, was already touching himself with your underwear on his hands.
Farmer¡Simon, who's with a problem, a big one. His hips are jerking forward as he holds your panties on his calloused hands, those same panties who's already with a white stain from his previous uses, but he can't stop himself.
Farmer¡Simon, who imagines you pinned down under him, seeing your face ruined with all that makeup you wear in tears, tears of the pleasure he would give you. He would love to see your petite body squirming on his hands, a slobbering mess, you would be so easy to mess with, it would be easy-peasy to make you reach your climax with only his fingers.
Farmer¡Simon, who keeps fucking his hands, sweating hard as ever, but this time not because of the sun or his hard work, no. It's because of you, because you're so beautiful he can't stop himself from being delusional, fantasizing about your body in every position ever created, just the way he imagines you to be in bed.
Farmer¡Simon, that's been pounding on your panties for what seems like hours, but it's only his mind. In reality, he just cums too fast with only thinking of you and fucking your tiny virgin holes on his mind.
Farmer¡Simon, that feels like a virgin college boy because of you, you turned him on the worst version of him. You messed up with his mind and turned him into that perverted huge man.
Farmer¡Simon, who's panting and biting his lower lip to hold some groans as he watches his pitiful state. His pants are lowered to his knees, he has your underwear on the palm of his fists, seeing how much he cummed on that delicate piece of cloth, already ruined.
Farmer¡Simon, that can only imagine you walking around with your laced rosy underwear on, all stained with his cum and so ready to finally take him inside you, the first man of his life. And with only that thought, he's shaking on the couch…hard again.
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Genuinely terrified of what's going to happen in November. It's hard to believe people are willing to usher in project 2025 in order to wash their hands of the issue. Abstention isn't going to make any of us less complicit in crimes against Gaza, and I don't know, I just think it's a bad idea to give the reigns of power to proud christofascists whose eschatological wet dreams literally require war in Israel/Palestine.
I know vote shaming doesn't work and I don't know what to say. There's no real reset after this election. Our hands aren't going to be clean no matter what. There's not going to be one big blow up where things are bad for a little bit before the dust settles and we somehow start working on fixing things. The religious right are long-term planners with the worst kind of short term goals and they absolutely will continue to stack the courts, secure even more tax breaks for the wealthy, make the world more unsafe for anyone that's not white and male and christian and rich, and I really want to stress this. These people don't care about Gaza. They don't even care about Israel except in the sense that they need it for their disgusting little end-times prophesies. They're a death cult.
I am not a liberal and I have not voted for Biden in a single primary and I really am just as horrified as anyone that we didn't get a primary this go around, but I will vote for him. I wish we had deeply progressive candidates on the ballot who'd make more bold choices but we don't. His handling of this genocide and his refusal to call it what it is is going to be seen not just as the horror that it is but also as one of the biggest fumbles made by an otherwise fairly adept politician accustomed to making bigger moves behind the scenes than while mugging to cameras. But I'm also just barely old enough to remember people voting for Ralph Nader and then Jill Stein in general elections to keep their hands clean and make a point and I'm old enough to remember how ineffectual that turned out to be. I'm trying to imagine a world where Al Gore had been president, had it not come down to some 600 votes and some hanging chads. Had I been old enough to vote in that election I might have held my nose and voted for neoliberal gore despite his involvement in a deeply corrupt administration. And you know what, in hindsight I'm almost 100% sure we'd have been better off as a planet if more people had done that. I don't know what kind of response Gore would have had to 9/11. Maybe it would have been no better – and it's hard not to draw parallels between the stupidity and profound cruelty of the US's response to those attacks and the stupidity and profound cruelty of Israel's response to last October's attacks. Who knows. But I DO think we wouldn't have been careening toward total climate catastrophe quite as quickly as we have been, and I do actually think that one less bad thing is one less bad thing, and when you're interested in material reality harm reduction actually IS important.
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20dollarlolita · 1 year
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If anyone is wondering, this tutorial to make this skirt is still a method that works. Both those links are from wayback machine captures from a time before Photobucket betraying us all and deleting pictures.
Yes, I'm still mad about that.
Anyway, in the spirit of seeing if budget lolita was still doable in 2023, here we go with a cost breakdown:
>Main skirt fabric was a $10 walmart 4-yard precut; enough fabric to make waist ties not pictured here >Skirt is fully lined with a polyester bedsheet I got for $1 at a surplus store >The bow lace was part of a bulk purchase, ended up costing 21cents a yard. Skirt probably has 6-8 yards of lace on it. The little vertical strips were scraps from another project. Back shirring on skirt is 1/4" elastic, which covid conveniently made super cheap. >I didn't have the zipper on hand, so I had to buy one for $1 at walmart. As anyone who has been on Wawak knows, that's massively overpaying for zippers.
This skirt is 3" longer and a few sizes larger than the one in the post. I had to make a new cutting layout for the skirt, and it took a fair bit of additional fabric. In addition, to save on fabric width, the "side seams" on this are actually a little bit farther back than the side of the skirt. I cut the back of the skirt to full fabric width, and then added the adjustment for the fullness into the side front pieces. Clarice, who wrote the original tutorial, mentions that the person she made it for was very small, so I sized it up a little bit.
I make sketches like this as I go for personal reference, but maybe it'll be helpful.
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In the spirit of livejournal, I "clarified" my sketch by making it more confusing in GIMP. (Your pieces you need to cut will be back: 44"x19.5", cut 1. Side Front, 22"x19.5", cut 2. Center Front, 15"x25.5", cut 1. Frills, 5.5"x44", cut 9 or 10).
So, when we get into it, yeah, if you have a good design (or can copy a good design) and you're willing to put some time into it, you can still do a budget lolita skirt for under $20 of materials, if you're careful. I'm mostly making this post to save which archive.org captures are the ones with working pictures.
(It also helps if you don't mess up on the waistband so many times that it slowly shrinks into a 1" waistband.)
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Fun fact: the trim on the ends of the waist ties may or may not be because I hemmed them sloppily and the hem came up bubbly, and zigzagging some lace onto the bottom handily covered up the bubbling. One of the advantages about knowing a decent amount about lolita fashion is that you can look at things and go, "Yeah, if I added x here, it'd be fine," and knowing enough about sewing to go, "yeah, if I do x cheat here, it'll look better" and being able to put the two together and go, "hey, if I cheat here, it'll still look lolita!" It's a good feeling.
Anyway, if anyone else has ever used Clarice's tutorial to make a skirt, I'd love to see it! This is my second time using it, but the last time was almost a decade ago at this point, and I think I've improved a lot since then.
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jelzorz · 2 months
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185.
It's not as difficult a decision as it sounds. Katolis is burning, and there are people dying, and if something isn't done, no one's going to make it out of the castle alive. Soren's seen enough, heard enough, and he'd gone to his father in spite of everything demanding he help, but the decision is this:
His life, or everyone else's. His heart, or the people of Katolis.
It's not a decision at all, really, and Soren had known from the beginning what being a Crownguard meant. How could he live with himself if he let others die in his place when his entire purpose is to protect others?
No. Not a difficult decision in the least, and he shoves the Staff of Ziard into his father's hands and looks him dead in the eye as he says it: "Take my heart."
Viren hesitates. Soren wants to punch him for it: people dead and dying, the castle crumbling around them, and here he is, a willing volunteer for the atrocity of a spell he needs to cast, and Viren is hesitating still.
"No," Viren says at last. "No. I won't do it."
Soren wants to scream at him. "What the hell do you mean—"
"I won't use yours."
Soren snarls at him, all but shoving him to the ground with the staff in his fury. "There's no time to find anyone else's. Use mine! I don't care! I'm giving it freely!"
Viren shakes his head. "I won't hurt you," he says quietly. "Not again. Never again. I'll use my own."
"You'll—what?"
"You have to go now," Viren tells him, his fingers closing around the staff. "You're still needed out there. You need to protect them and get them out."
Something clenches in Soren's chest. Not his heart, surely, not after everything that's happened, not after all the things his father did to him in the first place. "You need to cast the spell," he snaps. "It can't be you."
"Yes, it can," says Viren, and in spite of everything, he smiles, sadly, proudly, lovingly for the first time in what Soren is certain has been years. "It must be me," he says. "It can't be you. You have to go."
"But—"
Viren shakes his head. "I was never a good father to you, Soren," he says. "You deserved better from me, and my deepest regret is that I was too selfish to try. I'm trying now. For what little it's worth, I am sorry. It wasn't your fault. You did nothing to deserve such behaviour from me. Let me do this for you now. You have to go."
The thing in Soren's chest clenches again, blocking his throat and his lungs in a way that he can't understand. He swallows painfully, his eyes watering, hands closing into fists in the material of his father's filthy smock. "This is stupid!" he snarls. "You've never had a problem using me before. Just do it! Take my heart and get it over with! Why are you hesitating now?"
"Because I love you," says Viren simply, easing Soren's fingers out of the smock with the gentleness he should have shown years and years ago. "I have ways loved you, however poorly I showed it. It wasn't your fault. None of it was, and you are a better man today than I have ever been in my life. Go now. I'll keep you safe."
"I—" Soren chokes. "I can't just—"
"You can," says Viren softly. "Leave me your knife and go. You have others to save. Go. Don't look back."
So Soren does. He releases his father's smock and goes, his heart aching with every step for reasons he doesn't really understand. He's half way down the hall when Viren calls out to him, one final time.
"I'm proud of you, Soren."
Soren does what he's told and doesn't look back.
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badomensbaby · 7 months
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above the law. lrh
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pairing: luke hemmings x fem! reader
summary: luke's so sick of his assistant, you, talking all the damn time. he finally does something about it.
warnings: 18+ only. minors DNI. smut, thigh-riding, unprotected sex, verbal degradation, rough bj, slightly dubious consent, office sex, cum-swallowing, cursing.
word count: 4,173
a/n: i wrote this originally back in early 2023 as an au using one of my wattpad original characters. through some editing, i've decided to change the pov and post it here! i hope you enjoy x
feedback and constructive criticism welcome. requests are open!
Copyright © 2024 badomensbaby. All rights reserved. This original work is not allowed to be reposted on any platform in any format.
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"Hemmings, get your head out of your ass for once and finish this goddamn deal."
The curly headed blonde's eyes snap away from the project he's currently in the middle of, various folders scattered amongst his desk, drowning him in useless paperwork all for a stupid fucking merger.
"The fuck do you think I'm doing?" Luke grumbles under his breath, snapping the Bolton file shut and tossing his overly expensive fountain pen on top of the mess he's created. Ashton Irwin, one of three named partners, stands with his arms crossed in the doorway of Luke's corner office, an unamused expression on his face.
"I think you're trying to do all this shit on your own instead of utilizing your associate, that's what I think," the honey blonde scoffs, thick brow raising, "Where's Y/N anyway? You send her across town for your stupid coffee again?"
"No," Luke's quick to defend, though it is the easiest way to get you out of his eyesight for a little while and focus, "I've got her on the Mansfield settlement."
"The Mansfield- that's Mike's case, idiot," Ashton shakes his head, "What's the deal, Luke? You really hate Y/N that much?"
A sigh of exhaustion leaves Luke's lips, head cocking back as he stares at the ceiling. "She's just chatty," he says vaguely, "Can't get a single fuckin' thing done 'cause she won't shut up."
"She's your associate, Luke, stop pawning her off on Mike or he'll swipe her out from under you."
"Good," he forces out a low chuckle, meeting the man's eyes, "He can have her."
"Don't say things you don't mean, you know she's one of the best associates we've got." Luke's eyes roll at his boss' words, sitting up straighter in his desk chair.
"Whatever," he mumbles softly, not willing to admit your brain is undeniably better than half the fucking people he's met. "Can I get back to work now?"
A defeated sigh escapes Ash's lips, "If I don't see Y/N in here working with you I'll make sure to send Calum your way."
"Calum?" the curly haired boy's nose wrinkles, shaking his head, "That's like giving me a fucking puppy, Ash, literally useless."
"Your call." he responds, a little smirk on his lips before pulling Luke's office door shut behind him. A groan leaves Luke's throat at this, the urge to rip every last blonde ringlet from his head at the idea of spending the remaining afternoon going over these stupid files with you.
Regardless of the fact that you’re distracting, which he'll never admit aloud, he shoots you a vague text requiring your presence in his office, no more than twenty minutes from now.
And of course, your dainty little wrist began knocking on the dark wooden door of his office precisely twenty-three minutes after he'd sent the text, only fueling his annoyance. A curt "come in" leaves his lips but his eyes remain on the file, instead of the sinful black dress on your curvy frame.
Tasteful and tightly fit, your fingers instinctively tug at the material resting on your mid thigh, a worrisome look on your features. For as long as you can recall, Luke's always teased you about your wardrobe, especially the bright colors and silken skirts.
"You're late," his tone is flat, hand scribbling away at the paperwork he's nearly memorized already, "I swear to god if you say some bullshit about the elevator again-"
Luke's words die in his throat as he lifts his head, eyes landing on the tight fabric on your frame, hugging every fucking dip and curve of your body. You meet eyes, yours widening, worried you’re going to be lectured again. Was your dress too plain, too boring?
The sweetheart neckline alone almost makes Luke lick his lips, stifling the urge to say something far, far more inappropriate to his associate. "Doesn't matter," the blonde rushes out, "We're gonna be here all night. Preorder from Machi's while you're at it."
"Okay," is all you say, walking closer to his desk, the click of your heels echoing Luke's ears as you bend over, just slightly, grabbing his desk phone and beginning to dial.
After nearly four hours and neither had made a miraculous discovery, a whine of agony leaves your throat, sat across the moderately sized office, snapping yet another useless file folder shut. "Luke,"
"What?" he rasps, tearing his eyes away from the file, meeting your eyes, his own filled with annoyance. "Don't tell me you've got nothing, Y/N."
"There's honestly no reason why Bolton should be merging with Daniels," you sigh out, running a hand through your hair, "Seriously, it's like Pampers merging with Microsoft, they have no interest in one another."
"Christ," Luke mutters under his breath, jaw tensing as you continue to ramble useless information, "Do you ever shut up?"
Mid-sentence, your lips snap shut, a warmth spreading across your cheeks. "Sorry," you respond softly, and Luke almost feels bad for being so curt, but god you never close your fucking mouth. "Did you find anything?"
A huff of air leaves Luke's nose, "Maybe," he says, twirling his fountain pen between his fingers, leg bouncing aimlessly as he scans over the documents for the umpteenth time. "But you keep fucking talking and it's throwing me off."
"Sorry."
"Damnit, Y/N," his curls bounce slightly as he shakes his head, rifling a hand through them, glancing over at your position on the small sofa, dress slightly ridden up your smooth thighs. "Come here, let me show you something."
Hesitantly, you toss the file on your lap onto the cushion, standing and making your way over to Luke's desk, oblivious to the fitted material of your dress riding a bit higher than intended. Luke swallows thickly, attempting to keep focus on the file in his hand. As you lean over slightly to see what Luke's underlined, his eyelids fall shut, the smell of your perfume annihilating his senses.
"But that means-" you cut yourself off, lower lip tucked between your teeth, palms flat on the corner of Luke's desk, "This isn't about combining their companies, is it?"
"No," Luke finally says after a moment, slowly blinking his eyes open, "But we need to convince the judge it is."
"That's impossible, Luke, it's clear they're only doing this for-"
"I know, just figure it out, Y/N."
"That'll take all night," you whine softly, "I'm not sleeping in the office two nights in a row." Luke's teeth grit together at your response, frustrated and fed up with your goddamn attitude.
"If you can't do it I'll find someone who can," he cranes his neck to meet your eyes, narrowed and darkened, "You wanna whine about a few more hours be my guest, but you're not doing it here."
"But-"
"Jesus fucking-" he abandons his pen with a thud, rubbing the palms of his hands against his tired eyes, "I seriously have never met someone so goddamn annoying. All you fucking do is whine and complain and talk my fucking ear off," Luke rambles lowly, "You wanted to be an associate, so be a goddamn associate and shut your fucking mouth before I shut it for you."
You stand upright, embarrassment washing over your features, attempting to remain composed as tears threaten your eyes. It's not a secret that Luke's always harbored some sort of annoyance toward you, but he's never spoken to you in such a vile manner before. You swallow the thick lump in your throat, fists balled at your sides. How dare he say those things to you?
"You're an asshole," you say, voice wavering slightly, "You're always a dick to everyone. Nobody's ever good enough for you. I wanted to be an associate to learn and do what I love, not be talked to like a child."
"The fuck did you say to me?" Luke counters with a raised brow, ringed fingers slowly rolling up the sleeves of his fitted black dress shirt. "I think you forget who you work for. Not Ashton, not Michael, definitely not Jessica. You work for me, Y/N, and if you want to keep your fucking job I think you owe me a goddamn apology."
Luke's eyes flicker between yours and the hemline of your little black dress, the skin of your thighs soft and tempting as he widens the distance between his legs, splayed open. "Come here," he says, a bit quieter this time, though he's fucking seething internally, he can't deny how fucking hot it is talking down to the you. Hesitantly, you step closer, stomach swirling with uneasiness.
"You don't wanna go through those files? Fine," Luke forces out a low chuckle, "But I've got work to do and I'm not gonna let you get in the way of that. So what you're gonna do is sit right here," he taps on his clothed thigh, "Shut your fucking mouth and make yourself cum on my thigh."
"What-"
"You heard me."
"Luke, I-"
"It wasn't a question, Y/N. And so help me god if you complain or make a fucking sound you're more than welcome to leave."
For the first time, you’re speechless. Standing so close to the man you swear hates you with every fiber of his being, asking you to make yourself cum on his thigh, you can't help the clench of your own thighs at the thought. Sure, you’ve had those kinds of thoughts about the tall blonde, but never did you imagine his request.
"So? What'll it be?" Luke asks impatiently, a thick brow raised as he grabs his pen, clicking it profusely, leaning back in his chair.
Wordlessly, and swallowing your pride, you step closer, slowly lifting your leg over the blonde's thigh, his foot firmly planted on the small rug beneath him. His eyes almost widen, as if he didn't expect you to comply, and he stifles a grunt when your warm center meets the fabric of his slacks. He can feel how fucking wet you are through the thin material of your underwear, your dress sliding a bit further up your thighs, almost exposing yourself to him.
"Alright then," Luke clears his throat, leaning forward slightly to grab the Bolton file, relaxing in his desk chair. "Get to it."
With her heart rattling in her chest, you grasp the armrest of Luke's chair to ground yourself, filled to the brim with shame. Are you really going to do this? You can still back out, you don't need to show Luke how pathetic you are, fucking leaking on his slacks just from his crude words. You don't even register the rock of your hips against his thigh until a soft moan slips from your lips, catching Luke's attention, his eyes briefly flickering to you.
And fuck is it hot. Your eyes slowly flutter shut as your hips roll in slow motions, the friction from the fabric forgotten, sensitive clit throbbing from your movements. Luke's jaw tenses, tearing his eyes away from the tempting sight, his cock twitching in his slacks.
Shame and embarrassment are out the window as you near your first orgasm, the explicit images of things you’ve only dreamt of unfolding behind your eyelids. You can only fucking imagine how Luke's fingers would feel inside you, the things he'd say as he's bottoming out inside of your tight heat. And it's suddenly overwhelming as you clench pathetically, throbbing against his thigh and your own legs shaking as you finish. "Fuck-"
Luke's eyes widen, biting hard at the inside of his cheek to keep his composure, the sound of you falling apart on his thigh sending a jolt straight to his aching cock. He wants nothing more than to bend you over his desk and fuck the daylights out of you until you’re drooling and forgetting your own goddamn name.
Reality comes crashing down as your orgasm passes, ragged breaths leaving your parted lips. Did you really just make yourself cum on your boss' thigh? "Luke-"
"Do it again."
"What?" You ask breathlessly, straightening your back, "You- you want me to do it again?"
"What did I say about shutting that pretty mouth of yours, Y/N? If I tell you to do something, do it," he scoffs, acting as though the sight of you cumming didn't turn him on even more, "If you're pathetic enough to do it once I'm sure you'll have no problem doing it again."
Your sensitive clit throbs helplessly as you swallow, white-knuckling the armrest and rocking your hips yet again. The swollen nub continuously brushing Luke's slacks has you choking down whimpers and whines, fearful of Luke's reaction to you making noise. Though, the idea of what he'll do if you don't comply lingers in your hazy mind.
The intermittent bounce of Luke's leg isn't doing you any favors either, little uh uh's leaving your parted lips.
You’re fucking drenched, the thin fabric of your lace underwear doing nothing to keep your arousal from coating Luke's thigh as you roll and rock your hips a bit quicker, your second orgasm creeping up on you, your head tossing back when a low, drawn-out whine leaves your lips, cumming for the second time like a pathetic whore.
And Luke fucking loves every goddamn second of it.
Attempting to calm yourself down from your release, thighs still trembling, Luke tosses the file onto his desk. He hadn't read a damn word of it anyway, not when you’re grinding your pretty little cunt against his thigh like a slut.
Suddenly embarrassed, your cheeks flush a deep crimson shade as you realize what you’ve done. You’ve soaked the fabric of Luke's slacks with your release, your own goddamn boss. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have-"
"Don't say another word," he firmly cuts you off, "Get on your fucking knees."
"Why-"
"I'm honestly so fucking tired of listening to you, Y/N," Luke's tone lowers, a scoff leaving his lips, watching as you scramble to the floor. "Gonna shut you up, make good use of that stupid fucking mouth of yours."
Catching sight of the wet patch on his slacks, he nearly groans, ringed fingers fumbling with his belt buckle in record time, desperate for the release of his achingly hard cock. You seem to catch on, widened doey eyes flickering up to Luke's, your hands neatly folded in your lap. Luke pulls his slacks down just enough to allow his length to be exposed, not wanting to show an ounce of vulnerability to you. You don't deserve a sweet intimate moment, you deserve to be fucking ruined.
"Open your mouth," he grunts, hissing as he grasps the base of his cock, your lips parting slowly, the blonde stepping forward and guiding the tip past your lips. "Wanna see you choke on my cock."
He doesn't give you a moment to register his words before he's thrusting fully into your mouth, tip poking the back of your throat and a choking sound emitting from your lips. You scramble to grasp at the backs of his thighs to keep yourself steady. The sight of your sparkly lipgloss coating his cock is so fucking intoxicating and he wonders why he hadn't thought of it sooner.
Using his hands to grasp your hair quite roughly, he continues to fuck into your mouth at a degrading pace, not allowing you to adjust to the forceful movements. Choking and gagging sounds fill the otherwise quiet room, spit dribbling from your lips. "Yeah, you like choking on my cock, Y/N? So much better than hearing you fuckin' talk."
Your nails dig into the fabric of his pants, a grunt leaving Luke's lips as his hips continue thrusting his cock into your mouth. You can barely take all of him, the base nearly untouched. "All you're fuckin' good for, hm?"
And suddenly he's removing himself from your mouth, chest heaving from how fucking wrecked you already look, the small tears pooling your waterline smudging the mascara you'd put on. "As much as I wanna watch you swallow for me," he heaves out, "I wanna feel that pretty fuckin' pussy of yours."
A pathetic whimper leaves your lips, clenching around nothing as you remain on your knees before him, a string of saliva connecting your swollen lips and the reddened, aching tip of Luke's cock. "You want me inside you?" he asks.
You have no words, honestly, the burn left behind in your throat from Luke's forceful thrusts halts you from speaking. Instead, you nod. "No, I want to hear you fuckin' say it, Y/N. I'm not an asshole."
"Yes," you weakly respond, "I want you."
"Good. Take that fuckin' dress off while you're at it."
Your shaky and frail fingers grasp the hemline of your dress hesitantly, eyes flickering between his leaking cock and his firm gaze, pulling the fitted material over your head and tossing it aside. Now sat in nothing but a pair of soaked, white lace panties and your heels, Luke's eyes fall on your bare breasts. "So fuckin' pretty."
"Luke-" you whimper quietly.
"Shut up," his hands reach beneath your arms, pulling you to your feet. Luke reaches around you, large hand swiping the array of documents off of his desk, sending them to the floor with a thud. You release a soft gasp when your bare backside meets the cool wooden desk, "Can't say I've never thought about this."
Luke's hands fall to your hips, gripping the skin roughly, and guiding you down until your back is flush with the desk, legs spread pathetically, displaying your clothed core to him. "God, you're so fucking soaked it's pathetic," he laughs lowly, shaking his head, and trailing a finger along the dampened material, coated in your previous orgasms and current arousal. He sends a soft smack with the back of his hand to your swollen clit, causing a whimper to leave your lips. "You'll let me have you any way I want, huh?"
"Luke-"
"Don't talk, I already know the answer," he raises your legs so your heels are resting on the edge of the desk, fingers ghosting the inside of your thighs teasingly, "Because here you are, spread out on my fucking desk like the whore you are."
"Please-"
"God, you just can't listen, huh?" his hands retreat from your skin, fumbling with his necktie, folding it into a neat little square. "I said I don't wanna hear you, Y/N." leaning over you, the tip of his cock pressing against your clothed core, he forces the folded tie between your lips, gagging you. "There, much better."
Luke works quickly to pull the pathetic excuse for underwear down your legs, tossing them alongside your dress on the floor. His cock twitches at the sight of you, fucking glistening and leaking just for him. He trails two fingers up your wetness, slicking his cock with your arousal, and prodding the tip against you. "Look at me," he says, hovering over you, hands on either side of your head. Hesitantly, you meet his eyes, your own widening, "Wanna watch you take my fucking cock."
You look so fucking pretty all gagged up for him. Running his tongue along his lower lip, he roughly juts his hips forward, instantly bottoming out and a muffled scream leaves your lips at the stretch. The tears that brimmed your eyes previously begin to fall, feeling so full, "Fuck," he hums lowly.
He rocks his hips a few times, watching as your eyes practically roll back into your head. And god does that make him so fucking proud, staring at you as drool slowly dribbles from yourr lips. He halts, roughly tugging the tie from your mouth, fingers gathering the spit and shoving it between your lips. "Don't be messy," he tuts, before placing the tie back, "Already fuckin' droolin' like a whore and I'm barely getting started."
Luke retracts his cock, hands grasping at your hips and flipping your body, the sound of your stomach colliding with the wooden desk echoing through the room. "I don't wanna look at you," he says, palming the skin of your backside before smacking the smooth flesh. He realigns himself with your entrance, one hand splayed on your bare back to hold you in place.
Roughly thrusting inside once again, the moans and muffled choked sobs barely reach Luke's ears, too fucking entranced by the feeling of your tight little cunt taking him so well. "This," he rocks his hips forcefully, "Is fuckin' mine. Anytime I goddamn want it, you're gonna give it to me."
You scramble to grab the opposite edge of Luke's desk, white knuckling it as he forcefully pounds into you, so fucking deep and quick you can barely breathe. "Such a tight fuckin' cunt," he groans, fingernails scraping along your back, "Taking my cock like a good fuckin' slut."
Instinctively you clench around him, eliciting a deep borderline growl from Luke's throat, hand previously raking down your back finding your hair, fisting the strands between his fingers and yanking you backwards until you’re halfway to his chest. You rest your palms flat on the desk, eyes pinched shut in pleasure while he continues fucking into you at an unruly pace.
"Clench again for me," he moans out, feeling the muscles in his stomach tighten, his orgasm slowly beginning to build. You comply, your thighs trembling, clenching as hard as you can. "Fuckin' god," Luke tosses his head back, eyelids fluttering shut in pure bliss.
You choke out another moan around the tie in your mouth, unable to warn the blonde of your third orgasm that's quickly approaching as he continuously pokes the perfect spot so fucking deep inside you’re nearly a drooling mess. The hand not entangled in your hair grips one of your breasts roughly, sending you over the edge in a series of muffled cries. Tears stream down your cheeks, cunt tightening around Luke yet again, the blonde hissing as he feels your release coat his cock, the slick sound of his thrusts growing louder.
"Fuckin' milkin' my cock like a whore," he spits out, grip tightening on your hair as he pulls you closer, thrusting into you impossibly harder. You can't fucking think, you’re a dizzy mess and can hardly form a thought. You can't even feel the drool pooling from the edges of your lips. "Gonna fill up that sweet little cunt of yours and make you mine."
Luke pulls you flush to his chest, your head lolling against his shoulder. Though he isn't one for kissing, he doesn't hesitate to graze his teeth against your exposed neck, sinking them into the supple flesh as his hips begin to stutter, groaning against your neck as he releases inside. You wince at the rough bite on your neck but you’re too spent to care, leaning fully against him as he rocks through his orgasm.
You’re in a daze when he pulls out of you, nearly falling against the desk, the blonde quickly reaching for you to keep you upright. Though he's smug and feeling overly satisfied for ruining you, a swirl in his stomach tells him he needs to make sure you’re alright. He pulls the tie from your mouth, not commenting on the drool spilled from your lips. "Y'okay?"
You can't fucking speak.
Luke's brows furrow with worry, hand delicately grasping your jaw and searching your hazy eyes. Pupils blown out just like his, fresh tears lingering on your cheeks. "Oh, baby," the pet name falls from his lips effortlessly, "C'mon."
Tucking his softening cock into his pants and guiding you away from his desk and towards the couch, he plucks your heels from your feet. Though he'd never in a million years consider aftercare, he's stripping his button down from his broadened frame and slipping your arms inside, buttoning it to cover your exposed body. "Luke," you toss your head back onto the plush couch.
"Hm?" he hums softly.
"I need to- need to clean up," you rasp quietly, a hint of a blush on your cheeks, head reeling from the soreness between your thighs.
"That's what m'here for," he coos sweetly, though the smirk of his lips has you swallowing thickly. His ringed hands trail along your warm and flushed skin, parting your trembling thighs, the sight of his release slowly dribbling out of your sweet cunt nearly has his cock stiffening in his slacks again. "Mm, such a pretty wrecked little pussy."
A gasp leaves your lips as he leans forward, nose brushing your lower stomach, tongue gathering his cum from your sensitive folds. Lapping up every fucking drop, Luke straightens himself out, reaching a hand towards your swollen lips and parting them with his thumb. You’re beyond confused as he tightly grips your jaw, before spitting the contents into your own mouth. Swiping any remnants from his own lips, he narrows his eyes. "Fuckin' swallow."
Clasping your pretty lips shut, you comply, feeling a stir in your stomach when your eyes meet, and swallow.
"My good fuckin' girl."
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kcamberart · 4 months
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how do you get your shapes and models looking so well?!?!? especially your pokemon renders they're amazing, i need to know your secrets if you're willing to share
Thank you! There's a few different aspects that go into making my stuff look "presentable," but I find that manipulating perspective while working on my renders plays a huge part in making them look better than they would otherwise, especially since I usually try to keep my poly count as low as possible. Since the majority of my 3D art is intended to be seen only from certain angles and doesn't have to be exported to a game or something where people could view them in full, I can take a lot of liberties with it. For example, here's a render from a few years ago (2022) that I still like:
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And here's what it looks like "off camera"
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Everything is made of very simple shapes cobbled together to look like something more complex when viewed from the intended angle.
The materials, shaders and post-processing effects used can really help things look more impressive, as well. I tried my hand at (partially) sculpting in Blender recently (based on this Pokemon trading card), and here's the result without any shaders or effects, and then fully rendered:
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For this one, everything is still made up of relatively simple shapes, and the materials and lighting are doing a lot of the heavy lifting (if you're curious about my process for materials and lighting, I've posted about that a bit here and here and elsewhere on my blog).
But anyway, that's just my process as a self-taught hobbyist. Hope my rambling made sense!
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punkpandapatrixk · 4 months
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🧜🏻‍♀️Vain Sass ☆ Timeless Tarot Guidance
Elements/Signs in this reading are calibrated to all aenergetic placements. Feel free to read as many Elements/Signs as you feel called to at this point in your spiritual evolution♡
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
‘It is really a hard life. Men will not be nice to you if you are not good-looking, and women will not be nice to you if you are.’ – Agatha Christie
Well, what are you gonna do about it? Life is hard when you’re a girl; might as well do whatever you like. And if somebody doesn’t like you for your style, oh, who cares? Stop trying to be liked by everybody! You, don’t even like everybody. Live and let live. The most important thing is that you’re having fun on your own terms~
‘Eat whatever you want, and if anyone tries to lecture you about your weight, eat them too!’ – Vlada Roslyakova
pov: you're in an edit (recommend to listen alone)
☆♪°・. aenergetic companion PAC ☆♪°・.
[PAG Masterlist] [Patreon] [Paid Readings]
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Vain Sass for 🐞Fire Signs – Gold Astronomer (John Dee)
8 of Cups Rx, 10 of Pentacles, 5 of Cups
The power of Fire Signs is that you don’t easily lose yourself in the midst of a battle of wits. If you’re reading this and feel like this doesn’t describe you, it’s only because you haven’t fully tapped into your Fire Sass, trust me. You’re literally a dragon that possesses a breath of fire that can annihilate all of the naysayers in your Life. Sure, you wanna be wise when using it and not lose your temper to a point of detriment, and you surely don’t wanna burn those who actually care for you.
But when it comes to a struggle of wit and identity, you should stand your ground for that is the only way you will ever feel content as a Fire dominant person. Your dignity lies in your ability to maintain ground and create your empire of authenticity with your own hands, supported by your confidence in your ability to manifest every single thing you have ever wanted for yourself. As long as you stay loyal to yourself, you’re destined for great material happiness in this lifetime.
Outgrowing your bullshit is one thing, but changing yourself to fit some norms or expectations is never a good fit for you. Not for anybody, I guess. Learn from your mistakes, be even better, be stronger in your conviction, and continue to return to yourself as you grow up. Growing older is easy but growing up is not. It is easier to gain years than to gain wisdom. You don’t wanna be foolishly stubborn; you gotta grow up and wise up, and the older you get and clearer about yourself, the sassier I’m sure you get.
All Fire Signs are sassy and honestly quite vain. Is that a sin? Nah, hardly <3
Oracle Guidance for Fire Signs🔻❤️
🐏Aries – Priestess of Integrity
🦁Leo – Priestess of Luxury
🎠Sagittarius – Priestess of Happiness
Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Vain Sass for 🐍Earth Signs – Silver Astrologer (John Dee)
10 of Wands Rx, 8 of Wands, XVI The Tower
You’re cute, you know that, don’t you? If you want, you could turn simps into SLAVES; so when you’re in a pinch, you should not hesitate to use that sensual Earthy power of seduction to get what you want XD I’m hearing, you’re a juicy bitch (however that resonates LMAO) and you should never live a difficult Life! I mean, Earth aenergy is kinda twisted in that you’re defo the type that shouldn’t work so hard—because all the manifestation power of the Earth belongs to you. And yet, here you are struggling to make ends meet~ tsk tsk…
Communicate your needs seductively, attract the right people, the genuinely helpful ones, and thank them for all that they’re willing to sacrifice for you. I’m not teaching/endorsing you to be a selfish mean bitch who uses people like they’re walking ATMs hahaha So in essence, I’m getting that learning to be vulnerable in your communication can really help you with attracting an easier Life…more easily. As an Earth dominant person, you really deserve to live an easier Life.
If you’re motivated to work extra hard on something at all, make sure it’s something that matters to you on a Soul level. And most of all, don’t work so hard sacrificing yourself for things/corporations/goals and endeavours that are only there to make you look good in society. All of the passionate hard work you’re personally interested in, whatever it may be, it’d suit you best if your goals and endeavours can enrich the lives of those in your community. Earth aenergy, after being nourished yourself, literally lives for the enrichment of other people’s foundations/soils as well <3
Make it easy for others the way your simps are making it easy for you LMAO
Oracle Guidance for Earth Signs🔻💚
🐂Taurus – Priestess of Fertility
🧘🏻‍♀️Virgo – Priestess of Purity
🐐Capricorn – Priestess of Magick
Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Vain Sass for ⛲Air Signs – Red Geographer (Marco Polo)
Page of Wands Rx, King of Wands Rx, 7 of Pentacles Rx
Y’know, Air Signs are defo usually known for intellect and grace, but what some people forget to remember is that underdeveloped Air Signs are some of the world’s worst cowards. Listen, this is tough love, baby. If your Air aenergy makes you weak, meek, scared and anxious, you gotta tune into other elements in your natal chart that could help you gain confidence, first and foremost, until you know how to develop your Air quality alright.
You’re intelligent, and so that makes you aware of the possibilities of how other people react/respond to what you say or how you behave. And since you value being on good terms with people, you could be juggling WAY too many thoughts and calculations on how well or badly people could receive you. That’s bullshit, OK? You’re expending way too much aenergy on things that aren’t even real—they don’t even matter in the grand scheme of things. The most important thing is that you’re loyal to yourself.
If you’re with someone or a group of friends who don’t value you for your originality and individuality, they’re not your people. You have to have the courage to let such connections dissolve from your Reality. Air or no Air, all people deserve to be seen and acknowledged for their individual divine identity in Human form. Being charming in social situations is one thing but never be a people pleaser. Nobody has ever genuinely liked a people pleaser in the history of people pleasing each other XXD
Having an identity does NOT equate being a mean bully. Know the difference! <3
Oracle Guidance for Air Signs🔻💙
👯Gemini – Priestess of Opulence
⚖️Libra – Priestess of Shine
🏺Aquarius – Priestess of Patience
Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Vain Sass for 🐝Water Signs – Green Astrologer (Robert Fludd)
Queen of Cups, 3 of Wands, IV The Emperor
You, hold so many secrets in your heart that you keep from spilling over so as not to drown other people with your emotions. In that sense, you really strive to be a decent and responsible person. I think that’s healthy and admirable. But I hope you also find a way to express your emotions in other ways when the need arises. That much emotion not going anywhere could rot your spirit and make you bitter. Don’t do that to yourself, OK? As much as you care for other people’s feelings and ‘comfort’, you also need to think of your sense of sanity. If anything, that should be priority.
So speak your mind when you need to. If you find yourself failing at your first attempt or if you find you aren’t clear enough the first time, you can try again. It’s perfectly OK to be awkward in social situations tho XD Many people are awkward as fuck! Ultimately, it is vulnerability and honestly that will save your sanity. People who are able to speak vulnerably and transparently are the strongest people, you know that? That’s literally the realest confidence ever.
The way I see it, it’s people whose speech is impassioned with emotions and yet imbued with logic and rationale who make the most amazing public speakers. There is reason and sensibility, and yet, there is empathy. People who speak/communicate like this are the most loved and respected people in the public arenas. With the Emperor card here, I just know it that you can develop yourself to become a very engaging conversationalist!
So, before emotions bubble up to the surface hot and nasty, it’s better to speak what’s on your mind at the time it matters~ <3
Oracle Guidance for Water Signs🔻💛
🦀Cancer – Priestess of Rebirth
🦂Scorpio – Priestess of Intellect
🎏Pisces – Priestess of Clarity
Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
[PAG Masterlist] [Patreon] [Paid Readings]
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morganas-pendragons · 9 months
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Tender | Twelve
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short and sweet. based off of heaven sent and hell bent (because twelve has been my favorite for years and there's no fic for him, so I guess I gotta do it myself!)
Something is wrong with his hands. You're not sure what it is, especially given the fact he's barely uttered five words since he found the TARDIS again, but he's being particularly careful with how much he uses his hands.
You decide to test the waters of your capacities for physical contact and come closer, bridging the gap between you to graze the back of his hand with your fingertips.
He winces as if he's been burned. Like it's painful.
"Darling," You murmur, pressing your cheek into his shoulder as he leans over the console of the TARDIS. There is such sorrow hanging off of him. Such pain. A pain that only comes with the heaviness of loss. You know exactly why he bears this weight. It is incomprehensible to him, however, that the mere memory of a ghost occupies the hole in his mind. "What's wrong?"
It takes him a long moment to answer. "My hands," The Doctor murmurs. He is not willing to look you in the eye. "When I was in the confession dial, I spent the entirety of those four and a half billion years breaking through a material harder then diamond to get free. I could've left at any time to get home to you. And yet.."
Clara.
You had been with The Doctor longer than Clara ever had been. You knew his capacity for love, and you knew better then most how The Doctor struggled with this face and this body. He struggled with accepting himself for who he is. He struggled with recognizing that he could be worthy of love in this body.
You had made every effort to prove otherwise.
"I don't blame you," You say softly, curving around him to shimmy up onto the TARDIS console and run your fingers through unruly silver curls. It's one of your favorite things about this face. "And I could never blame you. You've always done things in the name of love."
"I've not let myself love you like-"
"Like what?"
He retreats from the tenderness of your touch with a snarl and a quiet clack of his teeth. "Like he did!" The Doctor exclaims. "We all know that it would be less shameful to openly love a younger face. Like Sandshoes, or The Chin-"
"I have loved every version of you I have ever known. But here's the thing I recognize," Your voice is soft and warm, a lure back to the space where you occupy the console. The Doctor flexes his aching hands at his sides as he did every time the pain returned, every time he's reminded of the suffering he endured inside of the confession dial. "They're all you. And in every lifetime, every universe, every finite moment of my existence? I will choose you."
He inches closer, like he's unsure.
"Always?" The Doctor asks.
You nod. He steps into the part of your legs and closes his eyes as you take his hands into your own, holding them in your own before turning them palm upward and laying a kiss thereupon.
Your fingertips trail downwards. Your lips follow their path, cradling his wrist in your hands as you follow the ache that thrums beneath your touch. He's always carried so much pain.
This pain, however, is a pain that will last lifetimes beyond you.
He shudders as you place your hands over his own on your cheeks. "You've spent so long engaged in a dangerous life, running away and being the hero that this universe will never thank. You're so used to.. cruelty. Hardship. Loneliness. But you know the one thing that I will never stop freely giving to you?" The Doctor shakes his head and leans into the warmth of your hands. It's rare for you to reduce him to silence. "Love."
"Love." He whispers. You sigh as his head falls into the crook of your neck, and The Doctor grasps you like his very being depends on it.
Love. Yeah.
Maybe he needs it more than he believed he did.
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