#vent blog

[drifting-bones]

sometimes i wonder if i’ll ever come to terms with being disabled. i guess i’m still holding out hope that i can get better, at least for now. but it’s hard when you’re literally just standing there, holding a camera, and your hands are shaking and your head is swimming and you feel like if you don’t sit down right now you’re going to die. it’s really hard when i eat a regular meal and have weird coughing fits after that always bring me to the verge of throwing up. it’s so fucking hard when you’re just sitting down and you’re out of breath and you have a migraine from moving around just a little too much. and it’s so fucking frustrating because it wasn’t always like this. it’s only been a year since i’ve shown symptoms of dysautonomia and it’s been two since i got my worst case of covid. i’m so fucking sick of living like this. i want to go back.

[injuredsoullessfrog]

[todostoast]

you ever just want to cut even if you don't really have a reason just because you miss the feeling of the cuts or am i losing it

[jishoumushoku]

that moment when you’re empty and nothing matters anymore . you don’t even know who you are anymore but it’s okay it doesn’t matter , you just want to disappear .

[hamoodmood]

[insignificantfailure]

Why the fuck am I the way I am

[ijustthoughtheavenwouldglow]

Wanting someone 2 love you like you love them when you have bpd is so shattering

[stuck-in-th3-void]

constantly filing the void with anything I can, food, alcohol, substances, sleep, anything to numb myself

i want to die

[drifting-bones]

thinking you're being overdramatic and paranoid over nothing only to be proven completely right is such a sickening feeling.

[injuredsoullessfrog]

[thedevilprince]

In the hearts of the people I love the most, I will always be second place to someone else.

[persephon3schild]

that shit never ends

[hamoodmood]

Albert Camus core

[insignificantfailure]

Not now please I'm busy rotting in bed

[youraverageventblog]

They’re going to leave me as soon as they see the extent of my mental illness

[rainbowslollipops]

i love self sabotage i’m so good at it (i’m a bad person)