#w steve for like .. a month ish i think

[bibleofficial]

ok so for leather goods (that ship to the us) ((BY QUALITY))

florence leather school

florence moon

massimo leather

[sacharinee]

hey! so i’ve noticed all your office references and it’s one of my favourite shows ever <3 i was wondering if you’d write something where the reader and bf!peter are both obsessed with the show and quote it at any given moment, confusing (and probably annoying) everyone around them. i love your fics by the way!!

pairing: bf!peter parker x reader

w/c: 800 ish

a/n: dinnertime with the avengers edition! peter and reader being an annoying power duo. a crap ton of office references obviously. this is so weird and all over the place BUT it was so much fun writing. i tweaked ur request a teeny bit to them simply saying lines from the show, but everyone is just as confused and annoyed lmao i hope ur okay w that!! this is also my first time writing with the avengers so i tried my best on getting them right. thank u so much for requesting this!! i had an entire office marathon playing in the background while writing this 

“the food looks great, nat,” you take your seat at the dining table.

“yea, it’s amazing, thanks for cooking tonight,” peter chimes in.

you both are sat at the dinner table in the lavish dining room among the earth’s mightiest heroes, who also happen to be your colleagues. 

“wait, where did you learn to make all of this? i never pegged you as a cook,” tony questions.

“i’m not,” the redhead answers, “my fake mother used to make this dish all the time when i was younger,” 

“awe, that’s adorable,” thor replies.

“right before she and my fake father sold me and had me brainwashed.” 

the others freeze midchew and stare as scott drops his fork against his plate.

nat clears her throat, “so anyways, enjoy,” and takes her seat.

the rest of you begin placing heaps of food onto each other’s plates and digging into the meal in front of you.

“well, um,” tony sips his water, “how ‘bout you kids, get any good action tonight?”

peter raises his eyebrows at him, “us? oh yea, we got a good chase during patrol tonight,” 

“it was super fun,” you add.

“well what’d he have on him?” wanda asks.

“he was, uhh,” you purse your lips as you hesitate, playing with the food on your plate and quieted your voice, “a-uh, a wanted animal rapist.”

wanda shakes her head at you in repulsion, regretting having asked you.

“that is so disgusting!” the god announces, food spilling out of his mouth.

“thor, close your mouth, you look like a trout.” steve reprimands. 

he dismisses his comment and goes to steal the mashed potatoes, eating straight out of the bowl with no shame. 

“did he put up a good fight against you guys?” bucky questions.

“well he wasn’t exactly intimidated by me, i usually let y/n play bad cop while i just web them up,” peter admits.

you’re chewing your food while you watch bucky and your boyfriend converse, “see what i told you? you gotta take control, pete. ask yourself this: would you rather be feared or loved by your enemies?”

“easy,” he answers, “both. i want people to be afraid of how much they love me.”

nat pokes her tongue to her cheek and tilts her head in confusion. 

“oh, that reminds me,” you nervously chuckle and pull out the slip tucked into your back pocket, “i need you to pay for my speeding ticket, tony.” 

“again?! y/n that’s the second time this month!”

“that criminal guy was a surprisingly fast driver. besides, life is short. drive fast and leave a sexy corpse. it’s one of my mottos.”

“goddamnit, y/n” tony mutters and shakes his head in disappointment. 

steve interrupts, “you should listen to him, young lady. seriously, what would happen if you were in a speeding car crash? why do you think those laws are enforced? it’s to keep everyone safe. so you better straighten up the attitude before you get yourself k-”

“cap, you ignorant slut.” you’re tired of everyone treating you and peter like little kids, “you want to talk about being safe? are we forgetting about banner’s little experiment that went wrong the other day? he almost blew up the tower!-”

“wait, what did you just call me?” the soldier looks at you dumbfounded.

“what did i- … what’d i say?”

“you just called me a-”

“i don’t know what you’re talking about. i talk a lot so i learn to just tune myself out.” 

“you and me both,” strange clips. 

“wow,” you respond, feigning hurt, “sorry i annoyed you with my friendship.”

tony, having enough, intrudes, “you know, i think i have to put you and peter through some training again.” 

the boy skeptically squints towards the man and chews his food slowly, “...what type of training?”

“sensitivity training. all this trash talk is-”

“oh my god, not again,” your head falls back as you groan, “i’ve changed, tony. i’ve learned to keep my unmannerly thoughts to myself every time i see someone wearing black socks with white shoes.”

“uh that’s definitely not true,” bucky cuts in, “just yesterday you called me out for wearing sandals.” 

“exactly! sandals! who the hell still wears sandals, you look like you just got off the boat. i don't need to see your hairy toes,” you shudder in disgust.

“yea, mr. stark,” peter reverts his attention back to tony, “we don’t talk trash,” he shrugs.

“we talk smack,” you finish.

“okay… and how are those two any different,” the man challenges.

“well,” peter clears his throat, “trash talk is hypothetical. like, ‘your mom is so fat she can eat the internet.’” 

“totally,” you eagerly nod your head in agreement, “but smack talk is happening, like, right now. like, ‘you’re ugly and i know it for a fact ’cause i got the evidence right there,” your hand motions in a circle to the person in front of you.

“are you calling me ugly?” thor sniffles.

“i don’t know what the hell you just said, and i don’t even wanna know,” tony wipes his mouth with a napkin, “but it’s happening. nine am sharp, do not be late. it’ll be quick and easy, not that hard. you’ll be in and out without the attitude.”

you pout as you and peter give each other a dismay look.

“that’s what she said.”

[your-unfriendlyghost]

I have two things to ask:

1.-Can we be friends?

2.-Do you have any Outsiders headcanons (or any that you haven't submitted yet)?

I mean sure?? Idk who you are since you’re on anon, so not REALLY, but I’m always down to talk!

2. Yeah lol- tons. Too many. Here’s a few (okay like 25 oops) off the top of my head lol, some serious/angsty and some lighthearted/kinda stupid without any real order. (Lotta ‘em are about Steve tbh -there’s so little to him in canon that I have the freedom to hc pretty much whatever I want)

Steve Randle’s nearsighted and has no idea, which is why he’s literally always squinting. (I’ve had that one for like months but only recently mentioned it on here lol.) Steve thinks his vision is completely normal

Dally and Sylvia genuinely cared for each other, but they were both so horrible at having healthy emotions that they just made each other worse. In a bad way, not a fun way.

When Steve gets kicked out, sometimes he hangs with Johnny in the lot. They don’t really talk about anything important like their shared experiences of having lousy parents. Instead they talk about cars, girls, music, school…lighthearted stuff. Sometimes Johnny will find Steve crying, which he never mentions- he’ll just sit down as per usual, which Steve appreciates. Steve almost never finds Johnny crying though. Johnny doesn’t cry much.

Okay tangent- I love how Steve and Johnny are low-key foils. Like Steve always seems tough but then cries when pushed to his limit, while Johnny always seems skittish until he’s under a bunch of pressure- in which case he suddenly is confident. (Not necessarily thriving obviously, but confident yk? Like grinning while saving those kids in the fire.) I know SE Hinton probably didn’t intend that at all, but it’s just such an interesting detail to me. One of these days I’ll put it into words better

Johnny’s jeans-jacket is a hand-me-down from either Steve or Two-Bit. (I can’t decide which lol) (obviously Dally would make sense too, but honestly I think it’d add more depth to flesh out Johnny’s relationships with the other members of the gang)

After the events of the book, Two-Bit starts hanging around the Curtis’s place even more. At first the gang assumes he’s trying to lighten the mood. It’s only after he gets sent to the cooler for a month due to drunk driving that they realize he was actually hanging around so much because he was trying to keep his kid sister from seeing him so drunk…

Two-Bit likes to joke that he keeps failing junior year so that him and his sister can graduate together. Which is a very bad idea since his sister is a year younger than Ponyboy.

Sodapop often feels like he’s only good for looking pretty and not all that useful or interesting otherwise. He likes himself, but when he stops to think about it too much, he starts to wonder if he really has anything going for him at all

My H/C for Steve’s home life is that his Mom is sick w/ like cancer or something. Before she got sick, Steve’s life was pretty alright for an eastsider- he and his dad fought, but they always made up for the most part. They weren’t perfect, but they loved each other. But after she got sick, she wasn’t there to mediate between Steve and his Dad anymore, and the fighting got worse and worse. And then Steve’s dad started drinking more and it was pretty downhill from there. Steve’s Dad still loves him, but sometimes Steve wishes that he didn’t. If he didn’t, then he could hate him. But his dad does love him, so he can’t get himself to.

Steve and Dally taught Johnny to drive when they were all like fourteen-fifteen-ish. Johnny is a very reckless driver. He loves speeding.

Johnny also loves fast roller coasters and stuff.

Dally doesn't ‘cuz he’s low-key scared of heights- he likes riding broncos and rodeos, but put him at the top of a roller coaster and he’s convinced that it’s gonna break and he’s gonna die. He pretends he doesn’t mind. The only people who know he’s scared of them are Johnny, and before she died, Mrs. Curtis.

Steve has a napoleon complex. Johnny, who is shorter than him by a few inches, likes to bully him for it sometimes

Ponyboy and Cherry don’t interact much in the school year after the book, but in the summer after, they start to hang out. Eventually they become pretty close. They fangirl over Paul Newman together

Ponyboy still doesn’t let Cherry read his theme though until years later

Marcia and Two-Bit re-meet a few months after the book. (Two-Bit is really scared that she’s embarrassed to be dating him, and Marcia is really scared that he’s embarrassed to be dating her. Neither of them are embarrassed. They both adore each other.)

Two-Bit likes to watch Marcia barrel racing. One time while he’s there, he runs into Ponyboy watching Cherry barrel race and immediately tells everyone much to Pony’s chagrin

Evie knows a little bit about cars, and she sometimes helps out at the DX during summers. Steve is so whipped for her lol (and Soda too Steve has two hands)

Evie and Sylvia are besties, but Steve and Sylvia hate each other. They act civil in front of Evie, but as soon as her back is turned they’re growling at each other like dogs. (Well Steve is. Sylvia just acts condescending as hell. Sometimes it goes over his head, so Steve knows she’s insulting him but isn’t sure what the insult is/means. Which makes Steve kinda want to kill her.)

Steve and Soda are low-key co-dependent. (Steve more so- Soda has his family at least, while to Steve, Soda and Evie are his whole world pretty much) It’s probably not super healthy, and both of them are vaguely aware of that, but are trying not to think about it too hard rn

Ponyboy’s friend group in high school consists of Curly Shepard, Mark Jennings, Scout Jenkins (from the tv show), and eventually, in her senior year, Cherry Valance. (There’s others too but those are the main ones.)

Pony dates Cathy Carlson for a while too, idk if they’re good for each other or not- I kinda like the idea of them being a sweet couple tbh, but no one else on here seems to care about them so I haven’t really explored the idea much lol

In a Dally lives au, Mark Jennings and Dally end up spending a bit of time together through Pony, and at some point they realize that they’re half-brothers lol. Mark is a deeply obnoxious little brother to have, and he drives Dally nuts on purpose. Weirdly I think Dally’s a relatively good influence on him, as much as someone like Dally can be. And Dally does care for Mark, though not as much as he cares for Johnny- Mark is, in his head, not exactly his responsibility.

Well I have (so many) more, but I think that’s enough for now lol. Point is, even though I haven’t drawn in a minute, I love these characters and their romanticized version of 1960s Tulsa so much and I think about them way too often lol

(dw once i get more into the swing of school I’ll be doin more art!)

[theidiotwhowritesthings]

Fate is Definitely Drunk

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Warnings: fluff-ish, very meet cute if meet cute was more panicked and frozen in shock, cursing b/c I can’t write without cursing apparently

Word Count: 1,050

Summary: Everyone has the words their soulmate will first say to them written on their skin somewhere. You have the most average words in the known universe so you assume you’ll have a soulmate that matches that. Fate ain’t happy you underestimated her.

A/N: This is part of my marvel soulmate series. I did a whole thing. Sort of.

Soul marks were a funny thing. Mysterious. Unpredictable. Seemingly random. Science tried to understand it, but no matter how many studies they pushed out there never seemed to be a concrete answer. Some people referred to the marks as, ‘Scrawls of Fate’. That’s what it had to be, right? Fate pulling the strings, dragging people together, and creating happy endings or whatever.

You weren’t bitter.

And yes, that’s probably what bitter people said, but you were not bitter.

Not more than the average human at least.

You’ve seen dream couples meet because of the words on their skin. You had a friend in elementary school find her soulmate in the first grade. Yes, they got stuck with words said by their toddler selves, but they were stupid happy. You had just attended their wedding six months ago. It was sickeningly beautiful. Most of the couples you’ve seen get strung together were doing pretty well. Nothing special or crazy unique, but they were content.

That was the goal, right?

To be content.

Anything above that was just extra, and there was nothing wrong with extra, but if you walked around thinking the fates owed you extra then of course you’d be disappointed. That was your view of it at least. Even as a kid you never really got worked up over your words. They were simple, average, and you wouldn’t be surprised if a handful of other people in the world had the exact same mark as you coincidentally.

‘Terrible weather, huh?’

Your soul mark was literally the epitome of small talk. You’ve seen a lot worse though. A friend in high school had the words, ‘Fucking fish’ on their arm. You were still very curious as to how that would’ve come up in conversation. Maybe you needed to reach out to him later just to see if he had met his soulmate yet.

The sound of your name brought your eyes up from the table in surprise. The gaze of all the other brand-new interns were zoned in on you, and the only reason you remembered the initial ice-breaker question was because it had put you off on the tangent your brain got stuck on.

“Nope.” You shook your head quickly and offered the group a smile that you hoped was less awkward and more ‘happy to be here’, “No significant other at the moment.”

The group leader, your new boss, was a chirpy brunette named Janice who was living her best life right now. Her smile filled her entire face and she seemed to radiate sunshine. Which was cool for her, but you couldn’t imagine being that excited on a Monday morning unless you were on something.

“I was hoping Tim would be back by now.” Janice hummed, drumming her nails on the table, “I was gonna have him pick you guys up some coffee. Nothing like a caffeine boost before we move onto the program training.”

You raised a hand, “I’ll go grab us some coffee.”

“You will?” Janice beamed. “You’re a saint. Just tell the barista that I sent you.”

The group gave you their orders, that you jotted down into your phone, then you hurried out of the boardroom with a sigh of relief. It was nice to finally stretch your legs after being stuck in there for the last couple hours. Honestly, you were so thankful to have this job. You were just a low-level grunt working the mail room and answering phones, but you were a low-level grunt at Stark Industries. Everybody said that’d look fantastic on your resume and since you had no real future plans right now it seemed like a safe bet.

The coffee stand was on the first floor in the lobby and was packed. It took a good ten minutes just to get to the front of the line, but you weren’t in any kind of rush. You ordered the coffees then wandered off to the side to wait for them to be made. Your eyes drifted to the large lobby windows that were currently being pelted with rain. You loved storms. It was funny that rainy days brought you such comfort, but you always figured it tied into your soul mark. You were never actively hoping for anything, but maybe your subconscious just knew this would be the setting you’d find the one in.

The barista called out your name and you turned away from the view. You grabbed the drink carrier that had five cups balanced on it. Before going upstairs, you drifted a little closer to the front doors and paused for just another second to stare outside. The board room you were stuck in had no windows at all, and only this close to the door could you smell and hear the rain.

Someone stopped a couple steps to your left and you couldn’t help but look over at them as they undid the clasp holding their umbrella closed. It took two seconds for you to realize that the person standing beside you with their umbrella was Captain America. Your eyes widened in shock. He always looked so big and in charge on the news, and in person he was legitimately intimidating. Tall stature, broad shoulders, and God, he was good looking. As in, who the hell had the right to look so good so casually??

Captain America glanced at you, his blue eyes meeting your gaze, and though your brain screamed at you to look away and not stare like a frozen creeper, you couldn’t move a muscle. You just stood there looking like the idiot you felt like. He politely gave you a tiny nod and warm smile. Captain America motioned to the door, “Terrible weather, huh?”

You felt the words on your shoulder tingle and your jaw fell loose in disbelief. Captain America just gave you one more nod before walking to the door. He opened his umbrella and you lost sight of him out in the storm amongst all the other walking umbrellas.

Had he just…?

Had you just…?

The drink carrier slipped from your hands and five full cups of coffee hit the tiled floor causing a disaster at your feet. You couldn’t even register that people were looking at you or that the hot coffee had burned your through your pants’ leg or that you were now standing in a pool of caffeine.

You gasped, “Oh, fuck me.”

[next chapter]

[polizwrites]

WIP Update - 23 Nov 2022

Had a slow-ish writing week  - I touched 3 fics (2 WIPs & 1 new works) for a total of 1788 words. On Ao3, I posted  the next chapter of my Stony Western AU, and  a pre-war Stucky domestic geting together ficlet;  the Stucky Bingo Round Robin from the November party was posted as well. On Tumblr I posted a  Bruce & Thor post-Ragnarok ficlet.  

Am at 11 active WIPs  (with a couple of maybe TBCs)  with my current   deadlines being   Comfortember and  Avengers Bingo, with  Man with a Plan, Starkbucks and Hero Hardships coming in close behind!  

See below cut for the WIPs  (arranged more or less by bingos/challenges/etc) I am working on  -   feel free to send me prompts or plot bunnies as well as asks regarding any of these projects   (or any other WIPs I’ve got out there) – they really help feed the Muse and keep me motivated!

Comfortember  [Runs thru 30 Nov]

Taking on the @comfortember writing challenge - I assembled a tracking doc and am aiming to complete one fill a week, preferably crossing over with a bingo fill.   I’ve posted fills for  Day 3: Warm Food and Day 16: Shelter  - hope to get a couple more banged out  by the end of the month.

Avengers Bingo [AvB] (Runs thru 24 Dec )

Twelve fills posted (10 to Ao3)  and 0 WIPs - I decided to further challenge myself on this 16-square card by pairing up each square with a unique combo of 2 original MCU Avengers, with the final square being PolyVengers. With the help of the STB Enthusiasts Discord folks - I’ve got all 16 squares  planned out, at least in terms of who to write about, and half of them have some sort of idea or crossover square to go along with them. Feel free to toss other plot  bunnies my way…  

* B3 - Road Trip  -  Wrote up and posted  Sailing Toward a New Horizon  to Tumblr.  It’s a Thor & Bruce post-Ragnarok ficlet  that also filled last week’s  @flashfictionfridayofficial prompt [#FFF177 Expand Through Horizons]  It will get added to Ao3 before the end of the bingo.

* B4 - Age Gap   - Thor/Tony - possible crossover with TSB One Night Stand  (obvious title: Thunderstruck)

* C1 - Opposites Attract - Clint/Thor  - there was a fun Tumblr  headcanon going around about a Bumbling Foreigner whose ignorance of  local customs  results in him flirting with/proposing to the prince -  this seems like a perfect matchup!  

* D1 - Friends w/ Benefits  - Clint/Steve - crossover with MWAPB Hawkeye/Clint Barton and possibly SRB - Never Have I Ever

* D2 - Romeo & Juliet AU  -  basic idea:  Steve (jock) & Tony  (geek) trying out for title roles in R&J - despite their respective  FWB groups thinking it’s a terrible idea.  Title:  Two Polycules, Alike in Dignity

* D3 - Bed Sharing  -  posted Finding Refuge here to Tumblr last week -  it’s a  Natasha/Bruce fic that is Age of Ultron based (divergent) and also fills today’s  Comfortember Day 16 prompt: Shelter.  It will get added to Ao3 before the end of the bingo.

Man With a Plan (Steve Rogers) Bingo [MWAPB] (Runs thru 31 Dec)

Fourteen fills, 1 WIPs and several Vague Ideas/potential cross fills with other bingos.  Prompts cheerfully accepted!  

* B3 - Farmer’s Market  -  crossover with TSB Doing Groceries. Moodboard + ficlet?

* B5 - “I don’t really want to wake up yet” - filled this a bit ago with Promises to Keep  posted here on Tumblr; it’s an established Stony ficlet with bonus Rhodey appearance that also filled a FFF   No Rest for the Wicked prompt and three October writing challenge prompts.  It came in at 453 words and will get posted to Ao3 sometime before the end of the year.  

* I1 - Steve is here for TFAtWS  - this might go well with my BBB  “Oh, hell no"  square - Steve trolling  Bucky & Sam by sending the old man in with his shield?  (moodboard & ficlet?)  

* N1 - School AU/Teacher AU  - if I decide to continue on with Technicalities   - I could fill this square  :: ponders::

* N3 - Online shopping - this might be fun as a crossover with BBB Thighs:  Sam buys a revealing swimsuit for Bucky as a gag that gets Steve in a tizzy.

* N4 - Soulmates -  got inspired by a dream to start a Stucky fantasy AU (magician!Steve/ensorcelled!Bucky) that @bill-longbow  is collaborating on with me.  This will also fill my Stucky Bingo AU: Supernatural square.  We’re currently sitting at 1640 words  (984-ish of which are mine). Current Last Line:  "My men will accompany you back to Brookline in the morning.”

* N5 - Checkers  - posted Chapter 2 of  Come Down From Your Fences  (And Open the Gate)  It came in  962 words - see if you can spot the (slightly altered) movie quote!  

* G4 - Canon Divergence post CA:TWS - possible  crossover with BBB  Kill List – Bucky wreaking havoc on Hydra bases and  Steve & Sam catch up with him

* G5 - Friends to Lovers -  might use this for Chapter 3 of Mutual Pinning

*  O2 - Sex Pollen  -  Teenage Groot pollen =  aphrodisiac  hi-jinks. Quill & Gamora  warn the  couple (stucky)/throuple (Stuckony)  ahead of time, so no  dub-con.

* O3 - Hawkeye/Clint Barton  -  see AvB - Friends w/ Benefits  above.

StarkBucks Bingo - Round 3  (SBB_R3) - Ends 31 Dec

Eleven fills (eight posted to Ao3), 2 WIPs and several Vague Ideas - soliciting plot bunnies or other kick-starters.

* B1 - “I wouldn’t mind wasting my time on you.“  - Possible crossover with  BBB - KINK: Seduction Mission?  

* I2 - Mistaken Identity - crossover with TSB K5 - Protectiveness -  “The Mechanic, The Soldier & The Artist” - mob/assassin AU with a Mr. & Mrs. Smith twist?  

* I4 - Canon: Avengers Academy  - will probably do Stuffed Marvels sketches of Tony and Winter, as I know very little about the game/canon.  

* I5 - Matchmaker Bots - possible crossover with TSB Occupational Hazard

* N2 - Blanket - the first draft of  Chapter 2 of  Borrowing Trouble (see O3 below) is done; it’s a crossover with my BBB Funeral  and TSB WinterIron  squares and is currently coming in at 1187 words.  Chapter 1 is scheduled to post on Friday, with Chapter 2 following probably on 12/2.

* N5 - “Wanna make a bet?”  Used this in combination with the Day 18  Fictober (“I don’t think this is your problem.”)  and Flufftober  (Soulmate AU) prompts for  Marked-Up Soulmarks  - a soulmate AU where Tony discovers he and Steve have something (and someone) in common. I may expand on this before posting it to Ao3 and/or claiming it as an official fill. Currently coming in at 418 words.

* O1 - Royalty - crossover with TSB - IronWidow  &  BBB   AU: Arranged Marriage -  pick Lady Natasha’s Consort and Lord Steve’s Companion  back up?

* O3 - “Shh… I’m sleeping.”   Posted Borrowing Trouble to Tumblr  on  11/4 - it crosses over with my TSB AU: College square as well as #FFF175 Gloomy Daze.  It came in at 875 words and is scheduled to be posted Friday, with a second/final chapter on its way the following week. 

* O6 - AU: Biker  - Grease 2  fusion  anyone?  😁  I watched the movie a couple of weeks ago and took notes -  It’s not gonna be a faithful adaptation, but hopefully fun - had another mini-brainstorm on this  & hope to get it started sometime this/next week.  Would love to collab with someone who has an AU:  High School, Identity Porn and/or Mutual Pining square on their TSB, BBB or SBB cards!

Hero Hardships Bingo  [HHB]  (Runs thru 31 Dec)

One fill so far  with a few Vague Ideas …  need to see what might play well with belated Whumptober prompts!

* I3 - Unimaginable Grief  – I‘m thinking an post-Endgame Rhodey POV would work nicely here…

* O3 - Dating a civilian -  this would fit perfectly with another chapter of Takin’ What They’re Givin’ (‘Cause I’m Workin’ for a Livin’) , for which I currently have a basic plot point or two rolling around in my head.

Bucky Barnes Bingo - Round 4 [BBB_R4] (Runs thru 7 Jan 2023)

Twelve fills,  four WIPs  & ideas for everything except one square  - Working on a Column B bingo to start.

* B2 - Funeral - see SBB N2 - Blanket  above

* B3 - Sam Wilson|Falcon - this would be a good candidate for a continuation of After One Or Two False Starts

* U2 - AU: Roommate  - Still wanting to use the Meet Ugly prompt: 02. I bought a house three months ago but I’m finally moving in and discover you’ve been squatting because you’re homeless    – probably WinterHawk with  recovering!Bucky being the squatter in Clint’s apartment building.  

* U4 - AU: Arranged Marriage - will probably pick Lady Natasha’s Consort and Lord Steve’s Companion  back up for this one.  

* U5 - Kill List -  see MWAP  - G4 - Canon Divergence.  Post CA:TWS above

* C2 - “Oh, hell no” - possible crossover with MWAP I1 - Steve is here for TFaWS

* C4 - KINK: Aftercare -  possibly MWAP Sex Pollen or  TSB KINK: Concubine

*C5 - “This might as well happen” -  Used this for the Sept BBB Round Robin  (crackfic - Emperor’s New Groove inspired)  wrote 276 words toward it  - not sure if/when it will post,  but will add a link when it does.   😁

* K3 - KINK: Edging  - crossing over with TSB KINK: Orgasm Denial/Edging & I finally got a start on the WinterIron PWP for this (Bucky POV with toy play and Tony as a power bottom)  Hanging by a Moment is sitting at 96 words at the moment.

* Y2 - Never the fall that kills you -  this might be the title for a reverse hanahaki WinterIron prompt from @lacrimula-falsa ….  

* Y4 - KINK: Seduction Mission - crossover with SBB - B1 - “I wouldn’t mind wasting my time on you.”  

* ADOPTED1 - Peggy Carter -  Finished Reaching an Understanding  - a one shot with Bucky & Peggy talking the morning after the CA:TFA bar scene. It’s coming in at 658 words and will post to Ao3 next week. 

Steve Rogers Bingo - Round 2  (SRB_R2) - Ends 31 Jan

Fourteen fills posted  & 0 WIPs at the moment   – happily accepting plot bunnies here as well.  

* A1 - Never Have I Ever -  see AvB  Friends with Benefits

* A4 - Touch Attention/Denial  - I have an idea for this that will also fill (heh) my Stucky Bingo  KINK - Double Penetration square.

* B2 - Mile High Club -  this seems made for Stony sexy shenanigans…

* E2 - Comics Nomad Steve  - SWC sketch of Nomad!Steve

Tony Stark Bingo - Round 6  (TSB_R6)  [Ends 28 Feb]

Thirteen fills and two WIPs at the moment -    with  Vague Ideas for almost every other square.  

* T1 - One Night Stand - see AvB - B4 - Age Gap

* T2 - Doing Groceries - see MWAP B3 - Farmer’s Market

* T3 - Pepper Potts/Rescue -  some sort of remix of/inspired by sabrecmc’s  Indecent Proposal  from Pepper’s POV.  At this point, I think I need to re-read the fic & take notes …  

* T4 - KINK: Concubine - possible crossover with   BBB C4 - KINK: Aftercare?

* T5 - WinterIron - see  SBB Blanket

* A4 - AU: College - see SBB “Shh… I’m sleeping.”

*A5 - Scott Lang  - @27dragons shared an interesting plot bunny during the Sept TSB Discord party that I may end up using; that or a follow up to A Piece of the Action

* R1 - Tony’s Poor Life Choices - @somesortofitalianroast had the excellent idea to turn this on its head - now that he’s with [partner of your choice] - he’s making fewer poor life choices?

* R2 - IronWidow -  next chapter of Lady Natasha’s Consort and Lord Steve’s Companion ?

* R4 - Occupational Hazard - see SBB I5 - Matchmaker Bots

* K2 - Secret Admirer -  carried this over from last round so I could try my hand a remix of Seeds of Love  (WinterIron hanahaki fic by the super-talented @hddnone).  Potential title:  Wraps Around My Heart, Refusing to Unwind

* K3 - KINK: Orgasm Denial/Edging -  see BBB KINK: Edging  

* K5 - Protectiveness -  see SBB Mistaken Identity

* ADOPTED2 - AU: Western  - see MWAP Checkers

Stucky Bingo Round Four [SB_R4] (Ends 31 May 2023

Seven fills and three WIPs with a couple of other vague ideas.

* B4 - Artist/Muse - posted  A Work of Heart to Tumblr  on 10/29.  It came in at  at 650 words and filled Day 29 of   Fictober (”You love this, don’t you?”) , Flufftober (Leaves) and Whumptober (”Better me than you.”)  Coming to Ao3 before the end of the year.

* B5 - KINK: Double Penetration - see SRB   Touch Attention/Denial  above.

* I1 -  1930′s - I posted  Casting Bread Upon the Waters   to Ao3 this morning. It’s a pre-war platonic Stucky ficlet  as a crossover with Comfortember Day 3: Warm Food, as well as this month’s bingo challenge - Cooking/Baking and came in at 456 words.

* O4 - AU: Supernatural - see MWAPB Soulmates  above.

* O5 - Innocence - used this for my addition (346 words) to the Stucky Bingo November 2022 Round Robin that was posted 11/18 -  It’s a super-cute accidental kidfic fic with bonus fanart.

I also adopted the Writing Format: Remix one of your fics  square  – am thinking of taking one of my Stony or WinterIron  No Powers fics and adapting it to a Stucky pairing – if you have any requests - hit me up!  

WinterIron - No Powers AU  –  Stony No Powers AU

————

On other creative fronts:  I have a Nadja (from What We Do in the Shadows) Stuffed With Character figure in progress. Am also finalizing the seven (!!!)  figures to create for my three Marvel Trumps Hate  auction winners – thanks so much for your generous support!!  Finally, I am prepping for a superhero con in March - so am pretty well booked up through at least the end of the year.

That said, if you’re looking for one of a kind gifts for birthdays or other celebrations, check  out Stuffed With Character   over on Facebook for a full list of my designs (now over 80!).   They’re  mostly Marvel and monsters, but I have some Star Wars, Star Trek, DC   and Disney figures as well. Plus I love to take custom design  requests  for any fandom!

[marvelcriminalhoe]

His Sinful Devotion

Part 5

Older! Dark! Church guy! Steve Rogers x Innocent! Naive! Preachers daughter! Reader

Warnings: Age gap, Dark, manipulation, dubcon-ish, power imbalance, Talks of god, talks of praying, talks of courtship. Steve is hardcore manipulative I’m serious, reader is hardcore innocent, groping, innocent kink(is that a thing???), praise kink, daddy kink. P & V action (but not sex). Naked humping (Is that how I describe this? idk) . I think that’s all? Idk let me know if I’m missing something. Obviously this is very much nsfw and 18+ only

AN 1: I posted this to my second account on mistake :/ so here it is again lol! If you're here for smut, its at the end. If you're here for storyline, it's at the beginning. If you're here for both, enjoy :)

Word count: 3,793 Series Masterlist

The annual church retreats happens every summer, starting during the first week of June. The church owns a small campground with a few single cabins, along with two dorm style cabins, one for the men and one for the woman, and one big cafeteria shared between all of them. 

The first retreat is the kids camp, where the all the church kids, ages 7-12 spend 3 nights, learning the layout of the Bible, pushing their bunk beds together to talk all night without getting in trouble, and playing down by the water in the sun. 

You loved those times when you were a kid. Those five days were really the only time you had friends all year, since your parents were so strict, and unlike the other kids who all went to school together, you were homeschooled. 

The next retreat is the teens camp, aged 13-18. They get to spend 5nights at the camp. They also have more class time, learning more about sin and the devil, how to not be like “the world”. Nights are spent sneaking into the kitchens for leftover dinners, days spent whispering about which boy or girl is cuter while trying to make it seem like you’re singing the right words during worship.

This is when retreat started being a little less fun for you. Cliques start to form around this age, teens usually sticking with the group of friends they have all year, which is something you weren’t accustomed to. But you still had fun, even if you were off reading passages while the other teens were whispering about crushes. 

The third week is for the single young adults, ages 19-24. They spend their 7 nights at camp, learning how to navigate the world and help turn more people to Jesus. There’s no sneaking out to the kitchens or whispering during worship. The Young adults that do go to retreat usually want some sort of career in ministry and enjoy the connections they make. They also might be looking for potential spouses, but it’s not as obvious as when you’re a teenager. 

The past two years, you’ve got to enjoy this retreat, make some acquaintances with people your age in the church. There’s a lot less games and lots more reading than the retreats passed, but you didn’t mind. 

This year however, you will be attending the adult retreat. It’s for ages 25 and up, but if happen to be younger than that and you are courting, engaged, or married, you can attend as well, since a lot of the courses during the 7 night stay are relationship based. 

Your parents thought it would be a good idea so you and Steve can attend some of the classes together. Steve also wanted you there, since he would be teaching some of the classes himself. Why would he spend 7 days away from you when he didn’t have to. 

It’s been about 2 months since Bucky’s visit, almost 3 months total of courting you, and Steve has you exactly where he wants you. You follow his every word, follow his every command without complaint. He felt like he hit the jackpot with you awhile ago, but now, molding you into the perfect little wife, he knows for sure. 

And after this week, everyone else will too, he’s sure of it. 

Steve hates the church retreat. Every year, same he attends, and every year it’s as if the single bachelorettes of the church vie for his attention. But this year, with you by his side, he’s almost looking forward to it.

Steve finishes packing his bag and grabs his phone, checking the time. He’s meant to be picking you up in 30 minutes, which gives him enough time to jack off before. He’s not sure if he will be able to sneak off with you this week, the retreat going to be packed with the rest of the adult congregation. He also didn’t think he would be able to stop himself if he had you blow him off on the way there. It’s only a 10 minute drive from your house to the camp grounds, and 10 minutes isn’t nearly enough. 

As he washes himself off, changing into a new set of clothes. He grabs his bag and drives to you. He’s quick to knock on your parents door and help you with your bag when you come out. 

“You look beautiful angel.” Steve smiles over at you as he gets back in. 

No matter how many times he’s complimented you, you still get flustered every time. You still don’t understand why Steve, this extremely handsome, most eligible bachelor of a man, has picked you out of every woman in the church. Steve is great, perfect even.

Sometimes though, you get a little, scared, of him. He’s never done or said anything hatful to you. He’s only ever been extremely sweet and loving. But one Sunday at church, when one of the men at church made you a little uncomfortable, Steve stepped in, and the way his voice got low and dark, paired with the murderous glare he had, sent a cold chill down your spine. 

But whenever you think of that moment, you shake it off. Steve is a wonderful church going man. He’s nothing short of perfect. 

“Thank you.” You return his smile, “you look very handsome as well.” 

Steve rests his hand on your thigh for the rest of the drive. When getting to the camp grounds, Steve kisses you sweetly after grabbing the bags out of the back, handing you yours. 

You split off, you going to the woman dorm as Steve heads to his private cabin. You can’t stay in the same cabin, considering you are only courting, so you will be in the dorm with the other women. 

You unpack your bag, making your bed on one of the lower bunks, smiling when it’s completed. The bunks are only twin beds, which can be a little uncomfortable when the springs poke into your back due to thin mattresses, but you don’t really complain about it. You have used the same twin sheets and comforter for the camp bed since you were 13. White with pink and yellow flowers embroidered all round. It’s almost like a tradition for you at this point, and it always makes you smile. 

As you turn around, you see Sharon at the bunk across from yours, unpacking her own things. 

“Hi Sharon.” You greet her.

She looks up from her suitcase, face falling when she sees you, “Oh, hi.” She blinks a few times, eyebrows scrunching in confusion, “I didn’t know you would be attending this retreat.”

“My parents believed it would be beneficial since me and Steve are courting.” You shrug. 

“Hmm.” Sharon nods, going back to unpacking her suitcase. 

You feel like she’s disappointed you’re here, and it makes you a little uncomfortable, but you shake it off, thinking she’s probably just tired. You bid her a goodbye as you head to the dinning hall, helping set things up for the week wherever you can. When you’re done, you head back to the dorms to wash for dinner, but stop when you enter through the door, hearing what’s being said in the room. 

“What is she, a child? Why is all her stuff so innocent looking.” 

“I know! I can’t believe she’s courting Steve.” 

“Well, she won’t be for long if I have anything to do about it. Steve wants a real woman, not some idiot little girl.” 

The woman in the 

Tears threaten to spill down your face, making you bump your shoulder into the door panel as you scramble to leave. You’re eye sight is blurry as you stare at your feet, sniffling and trying to get as far away from the dorms as possible. 

You know you aren’t the most sharp when it comes to relationships, mostly due to your upbringing, and you aren’t unaware of how people view you as naïve. The kids used to make fun of you, as if you wouldn’t understand the words they would spew. But you did, and this feeling, is not one you’ve learned to deal with well. 

You don’t understand why people feel the need to be rude and judge, especially with the fact you only ever really interact with people that are supposed to also be meme era of the same church. Supposed to follow the same ‘do not judge’ command. Sometimes you feel like you’re the only one that actually tried to do that. 

Maybe you are naive.

“Hey sweetheart!” You hear Steve’s voice call out to you. 

Steve.

You have Steve. 

He’s never once been mean to you or judges you. He’s only ever been caring and sweet. 

You wipe your cheeks as you look up, seeing a smiling Steve walking towards you. When he gets close enough to see your red eyes and puffy face, his smile turns to a frown, rushing to you and bringing you into his arms, “What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing.” You shake your head, burning it into his chest. The warmth in his arms is comforting, something you’ve found the last few weeks. 

“No.” Steve pulls you back, voice hard but eyes still soft on you, “Don’t lie to me, sweetheart.” 

You look down, trying to blink away the tears that want to fall again, mumbling out, “Th— the other woman were just saying some things.” 

“Saying what?” Steve asks. 

Were they making fun of you? 

Steve will not hesitate to hurt anyone that hurts you. No one can make you cry except for him, and he only wants to make you cry out of pleasure. 

“They said I’m not a real woman and the—they don’t kno— know why you’re courting me.” You let out in a broken whisper. 

All Steve can see is red. 

How dare they say such things to you. 

How dare they question him, question his actions. 

He wont stand for it. 

“Come on.” Steve grabs your hand, dragging you back to the dorms. You don't try to pull away, following obediently. Steve doesn't even bother knocking politely to make sure everyone was decent,not caring he wasn't technically allowed in the women's cabin. 

When the door swings open with a bang, Steve charging in, the women gasp. 

“Steve!” Sharon stands up, ending resting on her chest, “Goodness you scared up.” 

He does nothing but glare at her and her little group of bitter, single church woman. He pulls you in front of him, not turning his glare away from the others in the room when he addresses you, “Pack your things up, angel.” 

“Oh, is she leaving the retreat?” One of the woman speak up, watching as you move to follow the order. 

Steve can hear the underlining amusement in her question, and the red starts to turn to black, “No, she's not. She will be staying in my cabin, with me.” 

All the women’s eyes go wide at the harshness of his words, how scary he looks. 

“Do you think that’s appropriate?” Sharon speaks up, the only one that seems to not be affected by his tone, acting as if his eyes weren't piercing through her. 

Steve smirks darkly, turning to you, having finished repacking your bags and was now watching them all innocently, “Go stand outside sweetheart, I’ll be there in a second.” 

“Okay.” You nod. 

Steve waits until the door closes behind you before he moves his gaze back to the other four women, “This ends here. If you ever say or do anything the hurts her again, I will not hesitate to make you lives a living hell. And believe me, my hell is a lot worse than the one we preach about. Do I make myself clear?”

The woman all nod their heads, fear in 3 of their eyes, one with distaste. Steve leaves,heading outside and grabbing your bag from your hands and interlacing your fingers together as he leads you to the cabin he's been assigned. 

“Come on, sweetheart. Lets go get you settled, yeah?” 

“Steve,” You pull on his hand to get his attention, “I can’t stay with you. Its not proper.” Whispering the last sentence. 

Steve laughs softly, “It’s okay. I’ll handle it. I’m not letting you out of my sight.” 

And Steve means that. He’s not letting you out of his sight again. 

The cabin Steve was put in is very small, just a small lounge room, bedroom, and bathroom in it. All the furniture, like the rest of the cabins, is old and outdated.

By the time you've unpacked your bag again, it’s time for you and Steve to go to the dinning hall for dinner. 

Steve keeps you glued to his side all night, not that you complained. It’s something you've grown accustomed too since courting him. It’s probably normal to always want to be close to your significant other, so you assume that’s why Steve does it. 

One of the elders come up and ask Steve some questions regarding the reasoning for you not staying in the women dorms anymore, giving Steve a smile after he reiterates some of the story why, “You’re a good man Steve, looking out for your lady like that. That’s what a husband does.” 

“Thank you.” Steve shakes his hand, as the last sentence of the man runs through your mind. 

That’s what a good husband does.

You’ve only been courting Steve for a few months, but comments around the two of you getting married have been happening around the church more frequently. You’re not sure if you’re ready for marriage, ready to be a wife. 

But then again, it’s the one thing your parents have always tried to prepare you for. How to be the perfect church wife. 

It makes since, you suppose, that you and Steve will get married one day. Everything just happening much faster than you were aware. 

Are you in love with Steve though? 

Sometimes you think you are. You know you at least care for him deeply and you suppose that’s a part of being in love with someone. You do enjoy spending time with him, even when you get a little uneasy when he asks you to do things that seem bad. He always assures you it’s okay though, and you know Steve wouldn’t lie to you. 

He has no reason to. 

After dinner, Everyone heads to one of the outside chapels to listen to a message and sing some worship songs, before retiring to their beds. 

When you enter the cabin, you stop by the couch in the lounge room, “I should sleep here.” 

Steve furrows his brows at you, shaking his head, “Absolutely not.” 

“It’s more proper—“ 

“Angel.” Steve cuts you off, “What kind of man would I be if I had my girl sleeping on the couch when there’s a perfectly fine bed 10 feet away.” 

You shift awkwardly where you stand, “I just don’t want people to talk.” 

Steve smiles brightly, walking over to you and rubbing your arms in what he wants to be a comforting notion, “Don’t worry, sweetheart, I’ll take care of anyone that says something bad.” 

“Okay.” You say quietly, Steve’s smile growing wider at your acceptance. You both quietly get ready for bed, changing your clothes and brushing your teeth. 

You’ve never shared a bed with anyone before, and as you crawl underneath the covers, you can’t help but be a little timid, staying almost on the edge of your side. 

When Steve gets in bed, he looks over at you and frowns, “Why are you all the way over there?” 

“I— I’m nervous.”

Steve chuckles, “Why you nervous, baby?” grabbing your arm softly and pulling you closer to him. 

You shrug, “I don't know. I’ve never shared a bed before. You aren't supposed to.” 

“Mmm.” Steve nods, tilting your chin up so you look at him as he tucks some of your hair behind your ear, “That’s true. But it’s okay for us to share a bed.” 

“It is?”

“Of course it is.” Steve smiles, “We just can’t have sex.”

Your eyes go wide at his words, putting you in a flustered state like every other time he uses such crass langue. 

Steve’s smile turns to a smirk as he gently pushes your back down onto the pillows and bed, moving himself to be positioned on top of you, “Which we won’t. But, since we do get to share a bed this week, we should at least have a little fun, right?”

You blink up at him as his hands move to the bottom of your sleep top, taking it off and throwing it to the floor, his mouth effectively finding your bare breasts underneath. This is something Steve has done before. One of those ‘‘you feel like you shouldn’t be doing’’ things from earlier. But it does feel good, and you trust Steve. 

A small moan leaves your lips, making Steve’s dick harden even more. He’s been hard since he he saw you crying earlier. He doesn't like that those women hurt your feelings, but he's not upset about the fact he gets to share bed with you all week, which give him the opportunity to do whatever he wants to you. 

Well, not whatever he wants, considering he can’t have sex with you. But he can still use your body for pleasure in other ways. 

And he will. 

He positions himself better between your legs, making them spread around him as his clothed hips meet yours. His hand massages one of your breasts and his mouth envelopes the other. He moans around your hardened nipple, savoring the breathless gasps from you. He switches to the other, making both your breasts plumb with his mouth. 

Once he is satisfied with your breasts, he uses his hands to get rid of your shorts, leaving you in only your underwear. His right hand goes to rub over your mound, making you closing your eyes as you arch your back into him at the feeling. He continues rubbing you over your underwear until an evident wet patch is formed.

His cock is unbearably stiff to a point he can’t handle anymore and he removes himself from you, throwing his clothes on the ground with yours. 

You’ve never been bare at the same time, and despite the fact you still have your underwear on, your heart starts beating faster out of the implication of what this might mean. 

“It’s alright.” Steve assures you, having seen the fear in your eyes at the lack of clothes for both of you, “Just need a little bit, Angel. Just a little release. We won’t have sex, promise.” 

He grabs the fabric of your panties, slowly moving them down your legs, until it’s discarded on the floor with the rest of the clothes. His voice is thick with lust and wanting, a sprinkle of darkness in it you don’t properly hear due to heartbeat in your ears, “Just need a little bit, baby.” He says, looking down at your body. But you don’t think he’s even really talking to you. 

He slowly, so slowly you think he’s waiting for you to say something, brings his hips closer to yours, groaning loudly at the contact of his bare skin on yours. He has to close his eyes so he doesn't just dive right in, taking you here and now. 

We can’t have sex.

Steve knows that. He knows he can’t just devour you right now. All of his plans would be ruined. But god does he want to. He didn't think anything could feel better than when he has your mouth around him. But this, his dick slowly sliding through the lips of your pussy? 

Heaven. He has entered heaven.

If anything, it just makes him harder at the thought of what it will feel like when he can actually be inside you. 

Steve rubs himself against harder, his cock finding a home between your lips and he groans, rubbing himself faster. He knows you’re getting something out of the friction too when your low whimpers turn to loud moans. He wants more, and needs a way to ground himself, grasping your wrists, forcing them above your head.

“God, baby.” Steve moans out, cock sliding through your wet lips. Hips rutting against yours almost painfully. His balls slabbing against you with each thrust, “Feel so good. My good girl. So good.” 

He looks down at you, and he thinks this is where you look the most perfect, underneath him, completely at his mercy. The friction of his cock rubbing against your clit causes you to shake as you come, and again, like the very first time he made you come, he relishes in the knowledge that he will be the only one to ever know how you look when you do. He will be the only one to ever make you come. 

“Steve.” You cry out in a whine as he continues to rub his cock over your clit, riding you through your orgasm. It’s too much, feels like to much for you. But Steve doesn't stop, instead, rubbing himself against you harder and faster.

“Just a little more, sweetheart.” His voice is hoarse as he tries to keep control of himself, “Let me just use you a little more, okay? Doing so good for me.” 

His words, his praise, the fact he hasn't stopping with his attack on your clit, all push you over the edge again, making you shake as practically shriek at the feeling of your second orgasm. You have to close your eyes due to the black spots in your vision. 

It pushes Steve over the edge, seeing you lose yourself like that, his head dropping down to your neck again as his finishes with you. His come spurts out over your stomach, thighs, and cunt, mixing his wetness with yours. 

He looks down to you as he starts to come down, blissed and covered in him, it makes him hard again, but he has some of his self control back. That control doesn’t stop him from rubbing his come over your breasts and stomach, mixing his own scent in with yours. He hums when he’s done, leaning down to give you a soft kiss to your lips and releasing your wrists. You’re desperately trying to stay awake, the festivities of two orgasms exhausting your body. 

Steve lays back down on his stomach, not bothering to clean either of you up. 

He wanted to mark you. 

He pulls you, so you’re laying on his chest and chuckles when you try to stay awake, “Sleep, sweetheart. We have all long week ahead of us.”

And Steve can’t wait for it.

********

Taglist: @mansaaay @sofi1sstuff @sidechrisporn @namelesssav @spencerreidsthings @withasideofmeg @sidechrisporn @dontbescaredtosingalong @katiebby04 @emberenchanted @1-800-punch-a-pimp @siriusjohnpotter @evanswife1918

[donutloverxo]

Yes captain

Note - this is part three of corrupting a good boy but it's mostly porn so can be read as a standalone as well. Sorry about all the jealousy stuff its just what the muse calls for sometimes. Comments/reblogs are really really appreciated🙏🙏 Dividers by @whimsicalrogers.

Summary - You ask Steve to keep it on while doing it 👀👀

Warnings - 18+ only explicit sexual content, uniform kink, captain kink, daddy kink, roleplaying, jealousy, insecure reader.

Pairing - CEO!Steve x reader

Word count - 4.5k

“Ooo,” you yelped, trying to run away from his firm grip across your hips.

It only made him hold onto you tighter, his nails digging into the flesh of your hips. “There’s no where to run, babygirl,” he chuckled at your misery, delivering another harsh slap to your naked bottom.

You shrieked in pain as your flesh burned in agonising, but delicious pleasure. As if you’d ever want to actually run. “I’m sorry, daddy.” Since you were allowed to call him daddy now, which seemed to always make him forgive you, but you added your princess voice just to be safe and not make it any harder on yourself.

“You should’ve thought of that before you decided to make fun of my team, but you had to be a dumb baby and run your mouth,” he scolded you, slapping you twice before slipping a hand between your legs, the squelching noises of him gathering your slick on his fingers made your ears burn.

You had gotten too bored of him watching the game and not paying attention to you so you might’ve said some mean things about his team, but the jokes on him since your diabolical plan seemed to have worked.

You had gotten too lost in slight tinge of pain in the roots of your hair, that he was pulling, and his fingers teasing your core, you yelped forward when he slapped your pussy, gasping as you throbbed for more of it.

“Honey,” Steve shook your arm causing you to jolt awake.

You had a habit of talking or mumbling nonsense in your sleep and since he was a light sleeper it usually woke him up. He found your incoherent rambles and the little faces you made in your sleep cute, they were particularly intense tonight for some reason, and while he loved you with all his heart he was not about to let you talk nonsense about the Yankees.

“What? Where?” you sat up, rubbing the soft sheen of sweat on your forehead with the back of your hand.

“You were talking in your sleep, sweetheart,” Steve said, rubbing his hand up and down your back, “Come here.” He circled a hand around your waist, pulling you down and back against his chest, kissing the back of your head, “What were you dreaming about, hm?”

“Um...” you blinked, “How much of it did you hear?”

“You think your so clever, don’t you,” he teased, pinching the side of your hip as you giggled.

“Yes, I’m very smart.”

You shut your eyes, ready to go back to dreamland and to your daddy, who was just a version of Steve who liked being called daddy. Which was something Steve would never be into. Not that you’d ever admit to having such a shameful kink.

But you felt Steve grind his excitement against your ass, “You wanna go back to sleep, or...?” he asked, biting the shell of your ear before snaking a hand up your cami to grope your breast.

“You woke me up with such debauch intention?!” you gasped in fake incredulity. Deciding to indulge him and that any time spent with normal real Steve was much better than being with dream daddy Steve.

***

You fixed his tie, tightening it just a bit around his neck. His golden hair was smoothed back, your eyes caught a glimpse of his rosy pink lips. So pouty and perfect. You could spend hours just looking at them, his smile was what truly made you fall for him. But you pulled away when he tried to steal a kiss from you.

“Gloss,” you argued, puckering your lips. Instantly feeling guilty as his pink ones pouted, giving you his sweet puppy eyes.

“Come on, doll, just one kiss? Don’t you wanna wish me luck?” He bent to capture your lips but you moved your head away at the last second, making him groan as his nose bumped against your cheek.

“I spent over two hours getting ready for this!” you huffed, smoothening a hand over your puffy tulle dress, finally having a chance to wear it out in public.

“Did you just smudge my blush?” Gasping, as you looked into the mirror, picking up your rouge and patting it on again.

You loved the dress Steve had gotten you for Christmas, it was so pretty and princess and you felt like Cinderella wearing it.

But it was too... girl-ish, Steve had insisted that you wear it. So he could show off his beautiful new wife.

Tonight though, you had to look like a woman.

A strong woman.

Who is not to be fucked around with. And not someone who is vulnerable and weak.

Because you knew she was going to be there.

“You always look gorgeous,” he mumbled, looking in the mirror and patting his hair to make sure it was in place.

You had convinced him to grow it out. Having more courage to express yourself since the Christmas gift mishap a couple of months ago.

Tucking a loose golden strange behind his ear, you wondered how someone as breathtakingly as beautiful as him could be yours.

But as beautiful as Steve was, he could also be naive. He wanted to see the best in people, which often didn’t let him see what was right in front of him.

How his ex Peggy had been trying to cause problems between you two from day one.

At first she had welcomed you with open arms, with a treacherous smile her red lips had told you that she wanted to be best friends with you. Taking you to the MET museum, of which she was a board member, asking your help in organising a couple of galas and the fundraisers. Shopping with you to make you more presentable to be a CEO’s wife

You were prepared to be wary of her. The fact that Steve was still good friends with his ex, who he had dated for more than five years, didn’t exactly sit well with you, you knew you’d face some troubles there, but then you met her and spent time with her you knew that you did had nothing to worry about.

That was until she, and Steve’s mother, had tried to get you to sign a pre-nup before you both got married.

While Sarah was always nice, you could always sense a tinge of hostility, your intuition told you how she preferred Peggy over you and would much rather have her as Steve’s wife.

With a heavy heart you had told Steve you couldn’t do it. That there was no point in getting married if you would end up divorced eventually. You were ready to cut your losses then, to pack your bags and go home, preparing for the worst. But he understood and said that he wouldn’t be marrying you if he didn’t trust you.

You were glad to have worked out everything, but decided to play nice with ‘Judas', whom you learned had infamously betrayed Jesus from a mass you attended with Steve and Sarah, and pretend that you didn’t know anything about her betrayal.

You shook your head, there was no point in letting her ruin your night, or dictate what you wore. The dress was what you liked and who you were, there was no reason for you to pretend to be like her. Steve liked you because you were nothing like her,

....probably.

You looked over to Steve, tugging his pants up and securing them, you had never once thought you’d be someone who’d have a thing for men in uniforms, they were simply doing their jobs, what the fuck was sexy about uniforms anyway, but that was until you saw your Steve in his...

He really could pull off any color, even something as boring as army green, his chest and built looked almost too broad. Numerous medals adorning his chest. He certainly looked the part of a soldier.

He kissed your temple when he caught you staring at him and you only hoped he couldn’t decipher what was going on in that horny brain of yours.

Steve rarely ever talked about his days in the army. If he did it was about the friends he made and the good times he shared with them. And how army whipped him in shape, made him the man he was.

He had been honorably discharged a couple of years ago, all his army friends only ever spoke highly of him--which wasn’t really surprising.

***

“Hello, darling,” she smiled to you in her classy British accent, kissing your cheek before hugging you, “How have you been? Haven’t seen you since new years!”

“I’m good and you look amazing.”

Which wasn’t a complete lie, she did look elegant in her uniform, a lot similar to Steve’s but her coat had flares at the end which gave it a more feminine feel than that of Steve’s.

“So do you,” she beamed, “Oh, you have a little something,” she gestured to the corner of your mouth before wiping some white frosting from your cupcake off with her thumb as you tried to keep your face from cringing.

So far the strong woman act wasn’t coming along so well...

“So...how is married life?”

Wouldn’t you like to know. “It’s very good. You know Steve, he’s just amazing. I’m lucky to have him.”

“Oh, I did heard about your little goof with your erotica from Natalie, and the gift slip up!” she laughed, hooking her arm around yours, she walked with you towards your husband. “And here I was thinking you are a good girl,” she winked.

“I... guess I’m not...”

“I must say though, unfortunately for you I don’t think Steve would like any of that. He’s always been so traditional,” she rolled her eyes, “He has an old soul.”

Yes, you knew that. You knew that he was traditional and an old soul. Of course You did, he was your husband. Why she felt the need to point out the obvious was beyond you. “Well, you know people can be unpredictable,” you countered.

“Yes, well you’re free to explore of course, I just didn’t want you to get your feelings hurt,” she put a hand over yours.

“Peggy,” Steve greeted her.

“Oh don’t mind us. We’re just gossiping about you,” she smirked.

“Really?” he looked over at you with a quizzical face, “All good things I hope.”

“I don’t have anything bad to say about you,” you said giving Peggy a side eye, “Can we dance? Please?”

It didn’t take a lot of convincing because he loved dancing. After a couple of dances it was time for him to give his speech.

Seeing your husband up on the stage, hearing everyone talk about his accomplishments made your heart swell in pride. You really couldn’t believe you were married to someone like him.

You suppose that you understood where Sarah was coming from. It would make sense for someone like Steve to fall for and marry a classy worldly lady like Peggy. There really wasn’t much you could offer him.

***

“Steve,” you huffed, trying to yank on the zipper for like the tenth time, while you loved the dress you needed to get out of it and breathe for a while.

“Yes, doll?” he called for you, entering your closet, smiling at your struggling form. “How can I help?”

“You can get me out of this thing!” you said, turning your back to him.

You were really feeling yourself tonight, you had gotten a facial and a manipedi, a blowout, spending hours on getting ready for battle. You thought you looked good and fierce. But then you took off your makeup and your extensions and were reminded of how Peggy was much more effortlessly beautiful than you. She had often been dubbed as a ‘natural beauty’.

“Y/N?”

“Hm?”

“Is something bothering you?” he asked as he unzipped you.

“No. Will you let me change now?” you turned around, to politely ask him to leave.

“You’ve changed in front of me before.”

“Yes, well I can’t right now.”

“Why not?” he frowned.

“Because...” You couldn’t stop your eyes from turning misty, “I’m ugly...”

“What? Who told you that?” His face instantly flushed with anger as he held onto your forearms, and when you didn’t push him away he pulled you in closer to his chest.

“No one needs to. I know it because I’m not blind,” you confessed, the cool metal of his medal digging into your cheek.

“Then maybe we need to get your eye sight checked. Because you’re the prettiest girl in this whole world. I’ll fight anyone who says otherwise.” He stroked your hair, placing a soft kiss on the top of your head.

“You’ll have to fight the whole world then.”

“If it comes to that then I will.”

You couldn’t help but smile at how protective he was. Propping your chin up on his chest you blinked at him. “Why didn’t you marry Peggy? She’s so much more beautiful.” Your heart was heavy with so many emotions, usually you wouldn’t give in and ask something so dangerous--a question you weren’t sure you wanted the answer to.

Judging by the frown on his face, you were afraid that you had upset him, but then it softened as his pale baby blues twinkled at you, “Why would you say that, doll? Peggy is beautiful, but I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you. I could never even dream of marrying anyone else.”

“I’m sorry,” you sighed. “I know I shouldn’t be comparing myself to others.”

“You really shouldn’t. They don’t measure up to you anyway,” he teased.

“It’s just...” you gulped, not being able to hold his gaze you played with the olive green buttons on his coat, “I heard at the party from Tony, that she will be working with you from now on. Do you think that’s a good idea?”

“You don’t trust me?” his voice cracked.

You whipped your head up, frantically shaking your head from side to side, “No no of course I do! I’m just saying it’s a risky game. To be around her so much... what if old feelings resurface?”

Your heart almost broke as he let go of you, putting some distance between you both, “You know all I ever ask for is that you trust me... and love me. I don’t think it’s a lot.”

You scoffed, “Yeah well, I don’t think me asking you not to work with your ex is a lot. No woman would be okay with her husband spending that much time with her ex.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose, “Why can’t I get through to you?”

“Maybe try speaking at a fourth grade level. Then I’ll understand. Since I don’t have a masters in literature from Sorbonne,” you rolled your eyes. Maybe he was intimidated by how smart Peggy is and decided to go for someone younger and dumber.

“I’ve never... been in love with Peggy or anyone but you really,” he told you, his broad shoulders hunching as he let out a sigh, “Not the way I’m in love with you. We were always more like friends than... lovers.”

“Is that better or worse?” you wondered out loud. Isn’t it important for husband and wife to be friends as well? Was that supposed to be a compliment?

“It’s much better. We would go months without seeing each other, and I didn’t miss her. Like I miss you when I’m at work. I can’t wait to get away and come home to you. Peggy is amazing, and I’ll always have a special place for her in my heart, but I would never even think about cheating on you.

But... I understand where you’re coming from. Maybe I would react the same way if you were to work with an ex. So I can just tell her that she’ll have to work with Nat, or someone else.”

“No,” you blurted.

Absolutely not.

Because A - You really did trust Steve not to stray. He wasn’t that type of man. And B - That would be admitting defeat. Admitting to her that you are afraid of her.

“I do trust you, Steve. I think... I just need to work on myself. If we don’t have trust then we don’t have anything right?”

“I trust you too, honey,” he kissed your forehead. “Just talk to me about this stuff okay? You can’t keep it bottled up.” You nodded as he worked on loosening his tie.

“Um... is that uncomfortable?” you asked, watching him pop open the first button of his shirt.

“The uniform? A little. It’s been a while since I put it on.”

“I’m surprised you didn’t wear it at our wedding.” You smiled. Maybe it was a good thing that he didn’t. While he looked so handsome in the black tux he had worn, the uniform would’ve made him irresistible. You would’ve spent the whole evening swooning over him.

“It didn’t feel right, I just wanted to be myself. Uh... doll,” he quirked a brow as he caught you staring at his crotch, “Hey,” he snapped his fingers, “My eyes are up here.”

“Yes, um, of course,” you whipped your head up as soon as you heard him, since you were too busy trying to make out the outline of his johnson, “And what beautiful eyes you have!”

“Tell me something. What is your obsession with this uniform?”

“I don’t know what you mean.” You decided to feign ignorance.

“Really? You’ve been staring at me all night. Do you not like it? Do you like it? Sometimes I think I don’t understand women at all.”

You probably would’ve appreciated his suit even more so if you hadn’t spent so much time festering in your jealousy. “I think... it’s... kinda hot,” you sighed dreamily as he blushed a crimson red. “You’re like this big strong Captain, and I’m like this small woman, like a damsel in distress type of thing.”

“Oh.” Was the only thing that he said. He never believed you would be into something like that, not from all the feminist rants you tend to go on.

“Oh god. You think I’m a weirdo, don’t you?” You put your hands over your face to hide it from him.

“No no, hey, don’t be like that,” he cooed, pulling your hands away so he could look at your pretty face, “I can be your... big, strong Captain. And you can be my damsel in distress.”

“Huh?”

“Yeah. So... how would it work? Do I save you from a burning building or something?”

“No, sweetie. You’re thinking of a fireman.”

“Oh, right,” he blushed, scratching the back of his neck, “We can do the fireman thing if you like. I can... be a fireman.”

“Steve, we don’t have to do anything.”

“I know. But I want to. Come on! Give me something to work with.”

“Okay,” you cleared your throat. “How about... you keep the suit on?”

“On for how long?” he tilted his head like a cute confused puppy, looking down at his suit, “Oh! You mean on while we’re...”

“Yes. And I could, I don’t know, thank you for serving my country.”

“Yeah. I mean medals and all are nice, but I want a special kind of thanks from you, doll.”

“Ooo,” you felt up his biceps through his coat and shirt, he really was strong. “Do you have anything specific in mind?” you asked, batting your lashes.

“Um... yes.... You get on your knees, miss... I mean ma’am, shit,” he cursed as he awkwardly stumbled over his words. “What do I call you? Are you my wife in this scenario?”

“You can just call me doll, captain. I’ll be whatever you want me to be,” you smiled, cheekily pressing your lips to his in a quick peck but he held onto your waist before you could pull away. Sliping his tongue inside your mouth.

“Alright then, doll. Show me how grateful you are,” he puffed his chest out, so he could appear a bit more dominant.

You only giggled, taking your dress off because there was no way you could kneel in so much tulle.

Standing before him in just a strapless bra and a nude thong, you were vulnerable, but not scared anymore. He was your captain, he’d never ridicule you.

“I’m already feeling appreciated,” he said as he ogled you.

You dropped down to your knees, unbuckling him with some help from him, “It’s so big,” you gasped when you looked at his length, pretending to be seeing it for the first time. Although, you were still always surprised with the sheer monstrosity of it.

“We’ll make it fit, doll. Don’t you worry your pretty little head about that,” he smiled, tapping on your mouth, “Open,” he commanded.

You’re a natural, captain. You took a deep breath before opening wide. You’d been having sex regularly for the past three months or so, he had gone down on you more times than you could count, you felt as if he could live between your legs if he could. But he had never once asked you to return the favor, you didn’t have it in you to be the first one to bring it up either.

Licking your lips, you tasted someone of the preejaculate leaking out of his tip before wrapping your mouth around his head, moaning at the salty taste and the essence of him.

“That’s... ugh,” he groaned, “That’s good. Keep going,” he spurred you on, a hand on the back of your head giving you the slightest bit of push.

You took as much of him as you could, stopping halfway through when he hit the back of your throat, you pumped the rest of his length with your palm, holding onto his thick thigh for support, you bobbed your head, increasing your pace when he started moaning loudly.

Rubbing your thighs together to relive some pressure, your throbbing core desperate for some attention and friction, you knew your panties were ruined.

You had read your fair share of cosmos, and the many sex tips they offered, you knew they’d come in handy someday. You swore you remembered reading something about balls... to suck them? Bite them?

You fondled his balls, feeling him tightening in your palm, you were ready to swallow all of you. That was the only proper way of saying thank you.

“Wait,” he growled, pulling you off of him.

You looked up at him, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand, “Did I do something wrong?”

“No, doll,” he heaved, “But I gotta come in your pussy.”

Your jaw dropped, to hear the golden boy using such filthy language. “Whatever you say, captain,” you rasped.

Gasping when he yanked you up, pulling you over his shoulder and carrying you to the bed before throwing you down on the mattress.

Although Steve had always been dominant in bed, it was somewhat lowkey and subtle, he was never rough with you, he treated you as if you were made of glass, right now he was treating you as if you were literally a ragdoll.

“Take off your panties,” he ordered you.

You followed quickly, desperate to have him inside you asap, rolling your thing down your thighs and then getting rid of your bra before he even had to ask. You looked at him through your lashes, waiting patiently for his next command.

He hesitated for a moment before saying, “Now touch yourself.” It had always been a wet dream of his to watch you, instruct you as you got yourself off. Since your intention was to please him... he might as well make most of it.

You blinked at him before nodding, “Yes, captain.”

Fondling your breast you pinched your nipple, pulling on it before hissing exaggeratedly, smirking when you saw his hand twitch to touch you.

“What do I do?” you looked up at him with big doe eyes.

He shook his head, circling a hand around your wrist he shoved two of your fingers inside your mouth, “Suck,” he told you. “You like having your mouth stuffed, don’t you?” he asked as you noisily suckled on his fingers.

You shamelessly nodded, hoping that you’d get more opportunities to suck his cock from now on, he pulled your fingers out, bringing them down between your legs, pushing them into your willing channel. His own thumb rubbing on your clit working you up even moreso.

You threw your head back as you felt your climax approaching. “So close... captain.”

But he pulled your hand away from your pussy, tutting at your disobedience, “I didn’t tell you you could come.” He shook your head, giving you a minute to catch your breath before pushing two of his, much larger fingers inside you, “Gotta get you ready, doll. Since you’re so small.”

“Oh! It’s too much...” you moaned, holding onto the bedding.

“How're you gonna take my dick then, doll,” you watched as he licked your slick off of his fingers, “You taste like heaven, honey.”

“Thank you, captain.”

He unbuttoned his coat, he would be much freer without it and fuck you properly like you deserved.

You rolled your eyes when he folded his coat setting down on the floor, when you were literally lying naked before him with your legs spread wide, waiting as his tie and pants followed, “Really?” you scoffed.

“Can’t have them getting dirty, doll.” He knelt on the bed, now only in his shirt, spreading your legs a bit further so he could make room for himself, nudging your intimate lips apart with his length before slowing sinking into you.

He stayed like that for a bit, inside your heat, it felt as if he would explode then and there but he had to savor the moment. To have such a pretty girl wrapped around him.

Hovering over you he placed his elbows on sides of your head so he wouldn’t put too much of his weight on you, and so he could look at your as he fucked you.

He moved his hips against yours, rocking slow and steady, “You like that, doll?”

“Yes,” you nodded as he pulled on your hair to bare your neck to him. Biting your neck to mark you as his, “Do it harder, please, captain.”

“Harder?” he spoke against your neck, pinning both your hands above your head as he started rigorously pounding into you. “That hard enough?”

You were too fucked out to give a coherent answer, or to do anything but nod pathetically and take whatever he gave you.

“Ima come...” you clenched around him as your orgasm washed over you, rendering you immobile and weightless.

He thrusted into you a couple of times before filling you up to the brim - just as he had promised.

“Thank you, doll. That was really nice,” he smiled, laying beside you and pulling you closer to him, he kissed your forehead.

“Thank you, captain. You sure know how to treat a lady right...”

“Maybe we can do this more often,” he suggested as you nodded in reply.

Tags will be in the reblog! Click the link in the bio to be join the taglist or shoot me an ask/dm.

Shout out to my friend lizzygal (you can find her on ao3) who gave me the idea of Steve folding his uniform. It was too hilarious to leave out! Thanks for reading.

Please note that my work is not to be reposted or published anywhere other than my Tumblr or AO3 account without my permission. Reblogs are most welcome though!

[chrisevansgoodgirl]

santa baby (but Natasha is santa)

here is my literal last minute thing writing whatever for the happy hoelidays challenge by @stargazingfangirl18 @donutloverxo @navybrat817 omg this was supposed to be done earlier and i originally started writing for andy and is prob late bc of time difference anyway but i got inspiration out of nowhere and went with it and just started a few hours ago and i dislike my inability to commit to my fics.

summary: natasha gives reader and steve a sex toy. and asks for a video.

prompts: “I know a good way to warm you up.” + Friends w/benefits but OOPS we got the feels + Unwrapping presents together and what’s this? A dirty gift 👀

warnings: smut-ish, but like the lightest smut i’ve ever written in my life. no actual sex because i was on a time limit.

Seeing Steve Rogers on the floor of your bedroom with the ugly Christmas sweatshirt that you bought him before you left, surrounded by presents—smaller, you guys said nothing big, nothing expensive—and sipping hot chocolate was enough to erase all the chaos from the past few days.

You had always planned to spend Christmas together. It was unclear whether the team was going to manage to come together, who would still be lingering, who would be around but not in a Christmas mood. It was looking like it would be just the two of you, but then you got stranded in Russia because of the crazy snow.

You were devastated thinking that Steve would be alone. You were going to be alone as well, but you hated leaving Steve alone on the holidays, especially in the tower. It was huge, it was quiet, it seemed haunted almost. You also didn’t want him to be without someone, anyone, after the year he’d had. Though, admittedly, all of Steve’s years seemed hard.

Thankfully, Natasha saw Steve alone before she went somewhere to escape her own Christmas issues. They didn’t do anything overtly festive, but she did stay with him until you showed up. December 31st, you were angry every day went by that you couldn’t just jump on any plane and rush back to him.

He smiled at you and your heart stopped. He could always do that when he smiled, but particularly when it was directed at you. He was like personified sunshine, except now when you were craving winter, Christmas. He was as perfect as snow on Christmas Eve.

You dropped your bag and then he was getting onto his feet to meet you at your doorway. You didn’t wait, you rushed forward and jumped onto him when he was close enough. His arms wrapped tight around your waist and he laughed.

“Did you miss me?”

Ass. He knew you did. “I’m sorry that our plans got ruined.”

He pulled back. “What’s ruined? It’s a few days late, but we’re going to do it all. The only thing I needed was you.”

You set both hands to his face. These days, he’d been letting his board grow out so nicely, just to shave it off and see you pout about it. The confession about his beard you made nearly two years ago had gone to his head and was still making him cocky. “Did you have fun with Natasha?”

“Yeah, I did. She left us presents.”

“You didn’t open any of your presents?”

“Nope, wanted to wait for you. But you’re here now,” he set you on the floor. “Let’s get started. You need to change into your sweater.”

“Yeah, I left it in the bathroom.” Because you had expected to be back on the morning of the 24th, you just wanted to dive right in to the day you had planned with him. “I’ll be right back.”

“Since when are you so shy?” he teased.

You lifted your eyebrows, smirking. “What are you suggesting, Captain Rogers?”

As he leaned forward to press both hands to your hips, he brought his mouth down to yours. You couldn’t help but smile into the kiss—how had you gone so long without this? Okay, only a few days, but still.

He pulled away, pushing your jacket down until it slipped off your arms and onto the floor. You were in a white tank top then—no bra, because you wanted to immediately draw his attention to you—and he didn’t hide that he was appreciating the sight.

You had been sleeping with Steve for 10 months. It happened on Valentine’s Day, just a little before midnight, so it still counted—much to his dismay, he said it sounded cliché. You’d had a bad date, he’d had a bad date that you had talked him into going on. There was a lot of frustration between the two of you and you both decided there was no one better to work it out with.

He laid you out on the kitchen table that night, lips brushing against yours as he spoke. No strings, just sex. You thought you would be fine, you thought you were the distant one who wouldn’t need to worry about catching feelings. But you were incorrect and more than just stupid. Who would honestly think they were strong enough to not fall head over heels for someone who looked and acted like Steve? You, apparently.

You couldn’t say anything, mostly because you couldn’t imagine going a week without feeling him inside you. The thought was devastating enough to make the alternative of remaining silent seem more appealing. If you didn’t say anything, nothing needed to change. Until, of course, he met someone that he liked. Which was something you constantly dreaded yet couldn’t talk to anyone about.

His arms slipped around your waist, holding you still while he began peppering kisses along the neckline of your shirt. You were shivering in seconds, thankful that he hadn’t yet shaved. He would tomorrow, you knew that deep in your soul. But tonight, tonight he wanted to spoil you, clearly.

You were the one that began pulling your shirt up and he instantly got on his knees before you. As you lifted it over your head, he worked getting your pants out of his way. His eyes on yours, he kissed from your navel down, down, down, until he was almost there, then back up.

“Don’t you dare,” you scoffed. “You want to start this off with that shit?”

He smirked against your skin. “No patience today?”

“Missed fucking you,” you claimed. You had missed him, but you couldn’t say things like that. Your usual routine of denial was objectifying him as much as possible so that he wouldn’t think you could ever truly have feelings for him.

“Yeah…I missed fucking you, too.” And then his mouth was moving against your center over your cotton underwear. You would slip into a lace set once he let you escape long enough. That man loved you in lace.

“Steve,” you snapped, hands tugging at his hair.

He pushed your hips back until you were against the wall. When he pulled away, it was only to yank your panties down, but then he dove right back in.

It wasn’t safe. This. With him. His mouth was something sinful that made you believe there was no higher power. Because why would a man look like him, have an amazing personality, and be able to eat pussy? How was that not supposed to ruin your entire life?

For all your comments about Steve being an old man, those jokes that he pretended weren’t funny, you were being punished in the form of It’s a Wonderful Life. You weren’t one for old movies, but you had had to drop that when you started spending most nights with Steve, if he found you falling asleep, making a face, or commenting under your breath, he would give you a lecture starting with ‘back in my day’, ending with ‘your generation…’.

In summary, he always made you regret pointing out his age. Would you stop? Probably never, but it wasn’t without personal cost to you. Let it be known, you would put up with the merciless sass of Steve Rogers any time, any place.

You were standing on the bed, literally, standing. You had a mug of hot chocolate clutched in both hands and you stood with your legs wide, feet planted on either side of the bed around Steve. You could not stay awake if this movie was the only thing entertaining you.

He was laying on his stomach, sometimes watching you in the black parts of the screen because he could get away with it. You were wearing your sweater, a pair of lace panties, and long socks that stopped mid-thigh. He was waiting patiently, and as soon as you were done with that hot chocolate, he was going to grab you and toss you down onto the bed and force you to watch this damn movie. He might even restart it, he hadn’t decided how cruel he was feeling. But he also might stop to bury his head between your legs, he was unsure.

But there was also something on his mind, what better time to bring it up. “Hey, does Natasha know about us?”

“Know?” you echoed. “That we’re spending today together?”

“No…us. Like, us.”

“Oh,” you blurted out, hopping off to the side of the bed carefully so you could set your mug down. “Um, no, I don’t—”

As soon as it was out of your hands, he sat up and grabbed your hips. You screamed in surprise, but it soon dissolved into a fit of laughter as he wrestled you down to the bed—without much effort, obviously—and underneath him, scattering kisses all over your face.

You were breathless by the time you had your hand flat to his cheek, holding him away from you. “No, I just assumed you didn’t want anyone to know.”

“Well, it’s not exactly that.” He grabbed your hand, turned back to you, and kissed your palm. “It’s just that I don’t think they would understand.”

“Of course. Most people wouldn’t.”

“Right. Most people wouldn’t get…our arrangement, that we’re two people, just…fucking.”

You nodded. “Yeah, and if she knew then Sam would know…then Tony would know.”

“Hell, by that point, it might even get around to Bucky.”

You smiled a little, touching his face again. “Has he called?”

“Yeah, called on Christmas Eve.”

You frowned. You hated that you hadn’t been here for him. Bucky had long ago decided the Avengers weren’t for him. You knew that eventually he would get over himself and let Steve help him, but the in-between, seeing how sad it made Steve that his best friend wouldn’t lean on him, was hard.

“He’s in Mexico.”

“Warm,” you breathed. “I’m jealous.”

“I know a good way to warm you up,” he offered.

“Oh, yeah?” you scoffed. “How are you going to do that?”

He ducked down, lips finding yours for what to be the fiftieth time since you’d entered the room. Steve would kiss you forever if you let him. His hand found its way up your sweater, fingers just slightly pulling on your lace panties.

“Steve,” you huffed after several moments of not getting his touch where you needed it. He was not going to be doing this on Christmas! Even though it was December 31st.

Finally, he pressed his fingers down, even through the lace it was so good. “Does this work?”

Yes. Yes, it fucking did. You turned your head down to hide away in the bend of his neck. “I really missed fucking you.”

He chuckled. “Ma’am, seducing me is not going to get you out of watching this movie.” And then he pulled his hand away from you, smirking when your head snapped back up.

You groaned, throwing yourself back against the bed. “Steve, this movie is two hours! Please, please, have mercy on me, Captain America.”

He rolled his eyes. “Stop being dramatic. And no, not after that stunt you pulled on Halloween.”

You smiled at the memory. “Why, what stunt would that be?”

“Sending me pictures of you in a “slutty” Captain America costume—”

“But did you like it?”

“I prefer you naked, but it was nice.”

“Mm. Jealous I look better in red, white, and blue than you?”

“Now,” he scoffed, “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. You were hot but come on.”

You laughed.

“Where did you even get it?” he pressed. “I can’t imagine what kind of store—”

“A sex shop.”

He arched an eyebrow. “You go to sex shops? Without me?”

You rolled your eyes. “No, but really, are you going to fuck me?”

“After the movie.”

“Ugh!” You rolled over onto your stomach, but he wouldn’t let you up. You were under him still now just in a different position. He kept you tucked to his side, resting his chin on your head as you set your chin on the bed.

It was quiet for several minutes until he worried that your silence was indication that you were drifting off. He turned down and kissed the top of your head.

“Why’d you ask about Natasha?”

“I don’t know…she seemed…off.”

“She say anything?”

“No…but she gave me the Natasha smirk when she told me about our presents.”

“The Natasha smirk?” you quizzed. “Which one? The one we saw when she shaved Tony’s beard in his sleep or the one we saw when—?”

“When she found that girl in Sam’s room.”

You bit your lip. “I mean…she probably knows. We aren’t exactly discreet.”

“True. You okay with that?”

“Natasha’s one of your best friends—”

“She’s one of your best friends, too.”

“No, I know, but if anyone ever hurt you ever, she would personally destroy them. I don’t think I’m an exception to that rule.”

“You think about this often? You planning on hurting me?” he joked.

You scoffed, turning up awkwardly to kiss his jaw. “Yes.”

“Natasha’s note,” you read aloud, “says to open her presents last. Are we going to do that?”

He gave you a look. “Yes.”

You rolled your eyes. “Fine.”

It was finally midnight and that meant it was time for presents. There were too many to be sane, but you and Steve loved shopping for one another. At the end of it, he had a nice collection of sweaters and ties—he always complained about not having different ties—and a new watch. He gave you books and several of your favorite albums on vinyl, a dress he wanted you to wear on your next date, a pea coat you had been eyeing when you both went shopping for the rest of the team several weeks prior, and a diamond necklace. When you started to complain about how much he must have spent, he pointed out the watch.

So, neither of you were the best at following rules.

“Natasha’s presents now?” he asked as you were still drooling over the diamond pendant.

You closed the box and nodded. “Okay, she said it doesn’t matter which one we open, but open them last, separately.”

“These are joint presents,” he pointed out.

“Well, we basically spend every moment together,” you reminded. “Like, literally. When we’re not on missions.”

He handed you the square box, he took the rectangle for himself. “Am I the only one that’s very worried?”

As you were tearing through the paper, you gave him a look. “Steve, you need to be more trusting. Especially when it comes to Nat—”

His eyes had widened some time into your interrupted speech, but you didn’t stop until he pointed down at your lap.

In the biggest letters the small box could manage: COSMO’S TRUTH OR DARE. Our Naughtiest Sex Game Ever! You sat there for a moment, awkward and unsure of how to proceed.

He blinked at the box, shifted once, twice, cleared his throat and turned his attention around your room. There was nothing he needed to look at in your room, he’d been there a million times.

“So…she definitely knows,” you concluded.

He scoffed. “Great. And we are not playing that.”

“Oh, come on!” You turned the box over in your hands. “Ooh, what’s something dirty you’ve always been too shy to say to me in bed?”

He snatched the box away from you. “We are not playing this…game, if you really want to call it that.”

You bit your lip.

He gave you a warning look. “What?”

“I know you want to call me a whore.”

Immediately, his cheeks turned pink. “What? No!”

You shrugged a shoulder. “But you could, if you wanted. I wouldn’t say no.”

“I swear,” he muttered, looking down at the present. Suddenly, he didn’t know what was worse, whatever was in the box or talking to you about sex in such a casual, informal way. Sure, it was always “casual”, technically, but it was also serious. Important, maybe that was a better term. The two of you were not some bad romance movie, you were best friends and this mattered to him. A lot.

“Just open the other one.”

“I don’t know.”

“She’s going to know if we didn’t. Besides, how much worse can it get than a Cosmo sex game?”

He ripped the paper off quick, worried he might just back out completely if he took his time. And boy, were you wrong. It got much worse, a massage wand, rope in the colors red, white, and blue, and a note that said: charged it this morning! send me a video. xoxo.

You felt your mouth hanging open but when that had happened was beyond you. Natasha was shameless and you were going to buy her a book on respecting boundaries.

He turned to you, eyes narrowed. “You had to ask.”

Your face felt very hot, but why? You and Steve had sex a lot, and weird, filthy sex. It didn’t matter when, sometimes it didn’t even matter where. You were both insatiable and the other always seemed game. That was what made you both such a good team for this.

Minus the part where you accidentally fell in love with him, but you’d already resigned yourself to never speaking such a thing out loud.

But why be embarrassed? Why feel anything? Sex was sex, many people liked sex and had casual sex with their friends. What was the big deal? “So…are we going to make her a video?”

He gave you a flat look.

You snorted. “Right, because suddenly, you’re a prude.”

“I’m Captain America,” he shot back, “I’ve always been a prude.”

Your eyes widened at him. “You fucked me in a church—”

He pointed a finger at you, that was never to be spoken of again. That was… Wow, he blushed thinking of that. His mother would have put him, a full-grown man, in a timeout and he wouldn’t have felt he had the ground to protest. What had gotten into him then? He was still unsure, but you had been wearing a white lace dress and black stockings. What was he supposed to do aside from fuck you the first chance he got?

Rolling your eyes, you fell silent.

“You really wanna make her a video?”

“It was a joke.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

You considered for a moment, then shrugged. “I mean, she went to all the trouble of getting us these presents. Shouldn’t we at least try them out, and show her how much we…enjoy them?”

“Get on your bed,” he ordered. “Before I reconsider this.”

You did not need to be told twice. As you got settled on your bed, he walked to the opposite side of the room and dragged along the small side table you’d set by the door. He propped up his phone on a set of books, started the video and came back to you.

“Can I tie you up?” he asked.

“Yeah, sure.” He’d never done that. It seemed he wasn’t all too eager about trying it and you were always slightly apprehensive about relinquishing that much control. But this was Steve, so who better to try it with?

He set you up on some pillows, supporting your back, leaving your hips in perfect view of his phone. “Take off your sweater.”

You were left in your lace set, squirming as he moved around the bed with rope, eyes fixed on you. Like you said, he loved you in lace. First, your wrists were bound in white and you snorted—how thoughtful Natasha was when she wanted to be.

He gave you a flat look. “I’m not amused.”

But you couldn’t stop smiling, you figured that wasn’t going to last long so you just went with it. Steve was already a tease, but with you tied up? You wouldn’t even be able to kick him to get him to stop.

He spread your legs and tied them to the bedposts. “Did she measure the damn bed? The ropes are the perfect length.”

You snorted. “Why am I not naked?”

“Because I don’t want her to see you naked,” he answered.

You gave him a tired look. “Steven, don’t be possessive. Not with Natasha, she adores you.”

“Adores annoying me,” he corrected.

“Okay, you should stop talking. I’m not wet.”

He gave you a challenging look. “Really?”

You nodded.

He scoffed harshly. “You’re wet every time I’m within a mile of you.”

“A mile,” you repeated. “Wow. Well, there’s that typical American arrogance.”

“Hang on, I’m going to clean this.” He took the wand into your bathroom and you relaxed against the pillows. Steve and you had some toys, a bleak collection that wasn’t really meant to do much else other than offer a little help when Steve was a bit more battered than he wanted you to know about.

When he returned, he sat at your side and took your chin in his hand. He turned you to him, looking at your face for any signs of discomfort of reluctance that you weren’t voicing. “You want to stop, let me know.”

You nodded. “I will.”

He kissed you briefly before letting you go and turning down to the wand. “Okay, I’m going through the settings first, tell me which ones you like.”

“Okay.” You tried to appear relaxed, but you and Steve weren’t really…experimental. Sex on camera? Never happened, never would have happened had someone else not brought it up. And you knew, even though you liked using toys, you didn’t like how he was able to fully focus all his attention on you. He could watch you freely, there was no shying away from him.

There were three consistent vibration settings that rose in intensity, you liked those. The pulsing setting was a hard line, you protested immediately and did not miss the smirk on his face. He was going to use that on you one day. The rest were patterns of hard vibrations and varying pauses, he liked the long breaks because you whined and whimpered impatiently. He would abuse those, too.

He brought it back to that first, soft vibration setting. His eyes trailed along your body, your face. He was obsessed with every inch of you, and just as you had the realization that he was going to get to see all of you, he did as well. But he liked it much more than you did.

You were arching your back, trying to press your clit harder against the toy. He wouldn’t allow it, he kept it just right. Not teasing, but not as hard as it could be, not as hard as you wanted it.

“Can I ask you something?”

You turned your head, nodding gently.

“Is there something you haven’t been telling me?”

“What do you mean?”

He shrugged a shoulder. “Just curious.” He looked back down, pulling the lace aside and setting the toy to your clit. The barrier was so thin, but it made all the difference. Your body was shaking, tensing, pulling on the ropes, he could smell you, hear how wet you were.

“Fuck,” you breathed, eyes shutting. You didn’t want to watch him watching you, you just wanted this orgasm. “Fuck, fuck, fuck—”

He began running the toy in small, slow circles. When it crossed over your clit, your hips would jerk up each time.

“Steve,” you whined.

“You close?”

You opened your eyes, pleading with him as you nodded. “Mhm.”

“It’s okay,” he promised. “I’m gonna let you come.” He let the toy rest just where you needed it and you started moving as much as you possibly could. He could tell you were trying to pull away, but your legs were bound. You were attempting to bring your arms down, desperate to push the toy away, that was why he’d wanted to try this for a while. Not that he would have ever brought it up.

“Steve!” you gasped. You could feel it so sharply, you were on the edge, your body was about to snap. “I’m close, I’m so fucking close.”

“It’s okay, baby. Come on, let me see you come.”

Your eyes closed again, you threw your head back, and your body shuddered. “Oh, my god! Fuck, Steve, holy shit—”

Instead of pulling the toy away, he changed the setting to the next level of vibration. It was easier to move the toy around now, your pussy so irresistibly wet. He made the note to taste you when he was done.

You were struggling against the ropes, whimpering like you were in pain. But you weren’t, you didn’t even hate this. You liked the change, the shift in intensity, and you were starting to get to the pleasured, fucked out state when you didn’t care how Steve saw you. You actually started to get something out of him staring, worshipping your body like he was.

But you were overstimulated, body jolting harshly every time he let the toy press down too much. Your pussy was throbbing around the toy, and the minuscule breaks he gave you by running the toy up and down your slit weren’t enough.

He looked at your face, noticed your blinking eyes. They were hazy, glassy, he knew how to take you there. He knew how to get you so trusting and so unaware, and never had he taken advantage of it. But now, now he was thinking this was his only chance. You were smart and calculated, responsible, safe. Maybe he needed you reckless for a second or two.

“You sure there’s nothing you haven’t told me?” he inquired.

You scoffed, tilting your head back further as you yanked down on the ropes. You didn’t think you would get free, you just needed some pain to ground you, only a bit. “There’s a lot I haven’t told you. Was there something more specific on your mind?”

“You ever lie to me?”

“Steve,” you breathed, “Are you serious right now?”

“Yep. But you can come before you answer.” He applied more pressure with the toy and you screamed his name. He liked that, he liked you being so needy for him on camera. He liked that Natasha was going to see that.

Your second orgasm was rough and your muscles ached with all your wiggling around. You needed to stop, but you didn’t want to stop. You hated how addicted you were to letting Steve do this to you. It wasn’t even so much about the orgasms but more about how well he had gotten to know all those special things about how to make you cry and scream and beg. You weren’t surprised when he once again switched over to that last solid vibration setting. “Fuck!”

“Have you ever lied to me?”

“I-I honestly don’t think so,” you blurted out. “But fucking hell, Steve, I can hardly remember my fucking name.”

He scoffed.

“Why the hell are you asking that?” you demanded. You were angry, maybe, you knew you would have been, had the circumstances not been so pleasant. Lie? Why the hell would you lie to him?

“I’m just curious if you’ll lie to me when I ask my next question.”

“Which is what, Steve?”

“Don’t worry about that right now. I wanna see you come again.”

“Fuck,” you hissed, “Fuck you, Steve.”

He laid out on his side, his arm stretched down as he moved over you to press his lips to yours. The kiss was sloppy and broken by your high-pitched moans. They were always higher the more he got you off, he’d noticed that a while back, now it was always his goal.

He couldn’t get any harder, he pressed the bulge in his pants to your hip for just a bit of relief. But you felt him, of course you did, and that meant you were now wiggling your hips harder, you were rubbing over him, and because he was weak, he started canting his hips against you.

You turned away from him when you were coming, closing your eyes tight as your body tensed up for those few seconds, and then you crashed hard. You were finished, you couldn’t take any more of this, but he wasn’t done.

Steve had never done this, he never finished unless he was inside you, your mouth, your hand. He’d never actually finished in his fucking pants, but you were next to him, weak and panting, your hips were still moving for him. You wanted him to come. Your lips were swollen, your eyes were red and full of tears. He fucking loved seeing you like this, getting you like this. He finished with a soft groan against your shoulder and immediately pulled the toy away.

You whined at the sudden loss, but he quickly placed his hand back to you. He wasn’t going to get you off, he just always liked to soothe your aching cunt after he was that hard on you. He pressed two fingers into you, gathering up as much of you as he could. When you turned your head back to him for a kiss, he obliged for mere seconds before he brought his hand between the two of you. Until his skin was clean, you both licked and sucked on his fingers, then he moved them aside and you were kissing again.

But he needed to act fast, his window was shutting. He pulled away and waited until you opened your eyes. “Do you have feelings for me?”

Your initial instinct told you to lie, but there was something about this whole setting. You couldn’t lie to him when you were like this, after you had been touching the way you had. You also doubted his ability to stay away from you. He might not love you, but he loved fucking you.

“Yes.”

He blinked, looked stunned about your admission.

“You asked for a reason, you didn’t have any suspicions?”

“I did,” he muttered. “I just…didn’t think you’d admit it.”

“Can you go send the video to Natasha and then untie me?”

“Oh, shit!” He hopped out of bed, rushing to his phone. “We are not sending this to her!”

After much convincing, he did send it. If Natasha was surprised, she didn’t show it. She just promised to get even for him not allowing her to see you naked. She claimed it would have been the best way to start the year. Steve knew she was right, which was why his petty, possessive ass didn’t allow it.

Without the post-orgasm haziness in your brain, part of you was starting to regret confessing your feelings. You’d felt powerful, in control, but now Steve had the ball in his court. Yuck, you were resorting to sports references to express how helpless you felt? But he was giving you those Steve eyes, the stupid ones when you knew he was thinking, processing, trying to figure out his own feelings. He wasn’t the best at it, in fact, he was even more hesitant than you.

This could have been a mistake. You weren’t really sure what a good outcome would be. Dating? You weren’t overly optimistic about that. Oh, well. If he didn’t want to have sex with you anymore, it seemed Natasha would be interested.

[withoneheadlight]

NSFW Anon here and I’ve come back w the most NSFW thing ever right, so like imagine this,,,, Steve and Billy being happy and content,,,, wow

Hey nsfw! anon💗💗💗. here I finally am!

First of all: this is the most amazing, most beautiful of asks🌟. Thinking about then happy and content, thinking about them having a FUTURE together is, the most non-safe thing ever, definitely not safe for the heart, in that way love is always a risk, a leap of faith, it's not safe at all. But I honestly think these two can fall on their feet at the end of the jump. I don’t think is gonna be easy, ofc. It’s not easy people we’re talking about. The jump is gonna last long. Sometimes is gonna feel like a freefall. That rage Billy has inside is going to be hard to deal with. For Steve, for himself. Things like that leave a mark, and being raised like that, learn that you have to bite to survive, that becomes an instinct, so it’s going to hurt, learn to live with that inside. And Steve-- having so ingrained that love is something you have to buy, a rent you have to pay without fail so people stay by your side, well, that ain’t easy either. And there are so, so many other things they’ll have to deal with. To learn. To understand (about themselves. about the other. about all the other people in their lives) so they can keep moving forward. 

But if I’m not gonna be a romantic in here where else could I be? xD So I believe love wins, haha, at the end. Lame as it might sound. I believe that because the more I think about these two the more alike I found them. The more I think they’re like two sides of the same coin, spinning, spinning, and sometimes, unexpectedly, the coin stops on its rim, it doesn’t fall: they realize the other gets them. They realize they’re looking in the eyes of that somebody that is gonna know. when they need it. Its gonna look at their eyes and just know. And that’s not gonna make it easier but-- its the thing that changes it all. 

It’s the thing that rescues them both.

And that’s the idea that fuels all my stories because my stories are, like, always the same? xD, something draws them apart. Something draws them back. And the thing is, I had always imagined them, like, moving together to a tiny, shitty apartment after that, after everything happens, after they’re finally together, and for good, that last time. But then, after the two month+ quarantine I spent at my own tiny apartment, I was lucky enough to move to my parent’s house in the country,  and I had spent almost all that time writing them in a  frenzy, so the moment I got there, with all that green and the trees and the fresh air I thought okok, the apartment is good but they’re gonna buy a house, at some point, they have to buy a house. So I started to write this messy hc that is like, mmm, an epilogue, for a lot of those stories, like a mash-up? future fic-ish-y thing, mixing parts of them all. Like: no matter what happens. Or how it happens. All roads lead to this future. To them coming back to the other like gravity. To them buying an old house with a backyard, and an ugly couch, and a strange-shaped kitchen, with them finding their place inside themselves and together and in the world. And if not their place at least some kind of peace (because, well, it's never that easy either, as we are as ever-changing as life itself is)

But, you know, a good future. Together.

So, here is a small piece of that, a bit messy and a bit tooth-rotting but, I’m writing this is basically to make myself happy so, no regrets xD. Also i hope it makes you a bit happy too, anon, as you have made me with this lovely lovely ask.

…...

The kitchen is Steve's favorite part of the house.

It has this odd shape. Trapezoid. “Fuck, Stevie, so goddamn weird”. Doesn’t make sense in a, on the other hand, perfectly rectangular house (or, well, it does, but they’ll only find out about that later). The cabinets are ceiling-high. The tiles of the wall white and cracked under the repeating pattern of light mint-green-stemmed, yellow-petaled lilies. The whole backdoor is painted on that same shade Billy calls Ripe banana dreams, both so terribly old fashioned and fiercely cute none of them say a word about repainting it. There’s a wooden piece, built into the farthest end of the counter. It looks disgustingly juicy and mercilessly stabbed when they move in, but Billy insists on keeping it, and sanding, and treating, and varnishing it. Manages to get it back up on shape because “Better than anyone, darling you should know what a little touch of class can make”. And for more than two weeks straight the only goal of his life is to learn to cut vegetables at high speed because "I have to live up to this level of professionalism. Impress our most un-impressionable guests"

(And, to Steve’s surprise –and probably hers– when she finally dings to pay them a visit his mom is, in fact, pretty much impressed)

He learns how to make good casserole. Tries his luck with Mexican and Italian. Fails miserably with Japanese. Will never-ever admit it, but he loves it when flour ends up staining every single surface, making the biggest mess around himself when he bakes. Steve knows why it is. It's a shared feeling. Floats up till it reaches the ceiling and bounces back down to them, heavy with the warm smell of cooking pie and cinnamon. Tastes docile and tamed like “Maybe not so much vanilla next time. Whaddaya think, babe?.” Tastes savage and daring, like the overwhelming tang of freshly squeezed lemon lingering on Billy’s tongue when he crowds Steve against the fridge and kisses him, bites a shuddering laugh out of him “How the fuck are you able to even think about putting your mouth near that thing, Hargrove?. That was––ugh. That was disgusting” “Well you know me, whatever it takes to make you squirm” leaving Steve with absolutely no option but lick the sugary dough stain over his cheek to “Cover up that foul flavor” and maybe because he likes to make Billy shudder too. It’s an ever-present feeling. Like the vivid smells of green tomatoes and parsley and mustard sauce. Like the sensation of Billy’s lips against his. The way he loses his breath when Steve kisses the sugary flavour into his mouth.

This place smells like home, tastes like home. Like finally, finally. Home.

It’s Billy’s favorite place, too. But Steve doesn’t think it's just because of that. But also because maybe,

maybe.

He has also noticed that--

There’s this particular, particular moment. It happens around seven on autumns, right when the day starts to fade. It happens between six and six past twenty-eight on winters, and holds the sleepy cheeks of the newborn tulips on Steve’s garden till they fall asleep on springs, sun already sinking behind the horizon by the time both hands of the clock meet over the spiraling infinity of the eight. And it grows bigger and bigger and bigger from there: the golden sunlight seeping through the wide, double-paned window facing the backyard at an oblique angle, making the yellow flowers of the tiles look like they’re re-blooming in gold. 

It's the moment the day turns into a fire. 

It’s their favorite moment in time. And in this particular, particular day of summer, it happens at ten past nine.

Billy is making Spaghetti carbonara. The kitchen is damp with the rich smells coming out of the boiling water. Mushrooms and oregano, black pepper and lime. A song is cooing at them from the radio, the beat of the drums a boneless memory of that one echoing around the quarry that last night at the end of July. Water rippling under the quiet sigh of the breeze. Trees cutting the liquid rays of light in asymmetric halves. 

Billy takes off the apron, lowers down the fire.

Reaches out to Steve, fingers wavering come, come, come.

To me. Come to me. “C’mon, Harrington. Are you afraid of me or what?"

He has this way of looking at Steve that makes the space between them narrow, narrow: the whole unknown world. And aseptic, non-lived-in flat in downtown Florida. This tiny, tiny town. A mysteriously-shaped kitchen–

“¿Can I have this dance?” 

Steve walks to him, takes his hand. 

––Their bodies, pressed flush. 

Inside his chest, Steve’s heart is running. 

“Can I at least have this dance, before we say goodbye?”

Mazzy Star was playing. The corner of Billy’s eye felt wet where his skin brushed against the corner of Steve’s mouth. They danced till the daylight faded, till there were teardrops falling from the night sky (“Billy, I don’t have to–-” “Don’t. Don’t, pretty boy. Don’t say it. I’ll make you stay if you do. And I can’t do that”), they made lovelovelove on the back of Billy’s car.

In this light they fell in love, they fell apart. Ran away. Ran back. 

Steve nudges at Billy’s chest, makes him move backwards till he’s far enough to tug, draw him in between their arms, hands intertwined. Steve curls himself around Billy’s back, nudges at the warm trapped between his curls. He smells like BillyandSteve, like this home, like past, like future. Like us.

Steve whispers in his ear. Three words. Billy’s neck curves towards him. An instinct. Tickled by their warmth. Steve kisses the curve of his ear. Tugs the collar of his shirt aside, bites where shoulder meets neck and up, up.

“Easy, Prom King” Billy teases, grins at him tender and wild. Knows when to use the one that gets Steve every time “Or you’re gonna make me think we’ll become picture perfect from this magical night onwards. A bunch of kids. White fences. You know, the whole shebang” 

Billy crashed the Camaro into a tree in the winter of two thousand and fourteen. Had left the house in a frenzy. Something had happened Max wouldn’t talk about. But she was scared, so she had called. When Steve found him, he was in the middle of the Brookville road, feet following the twin yellow lines, so weary, so impossibly small like this, head hanging, feet stumbling, surrounded by the tall shadows of the pines. Steve stopped the car at his side, engine oozing steam, shaking in the cold mid-May air “Billy” he said. Low. Careful. Careful. Billy’s eyes looked wet in the moon-silver night, pupils blown, deceivingly calm, “What are you doing? You know this is dangerous” And Billy had leaned in, forearms over the rim, had leveled with Steve. Looking wasted, looking tired, but still, he flashed a grin at him, teeth-shark white, not going down if he wasn’t going down swinging. And Steve hadn’t known at the moment, but the blood staining his cheek, the screaming-purple mark around his eye, those weren’t from the crush. “I was sleepwalking, Harrington" he said, voice dry, laugh harsh "Waiting for a stroke of luck"

“What does it make you think that’s not what I’m aiming for?”

When he took Billy to his house Max was already there, had sneaked out, white knuckles peaked with red around the handler of her bike “Neil will kill you if he finds out” Billy didn’t say it, but she read it on his eyes. And Max had called Steve. Called for help. So Steve took care of Billy’s face. Made him stay. Spend the night. Almost the whole next day, didn’t wake up till the hands meet over the spiraling infinity of the eight. Steve left him there. Retraced Billy’s steps down the Brookville road, following the yellow lines. The Camaro wasn’t done yet. Howled like a wounded beast under Steve's hands, but stayed together all the way to Donny’s garage. Steve paid for the repairs. Covered it all up. Two weeks later, Billy showed up at his door. Offered to teach him how to fight “I cannot give you back your money, but I know you don’t need that”

They spent almost the whole summer together. Some days. Most nights.

Wasting time. Fighting. Joking.  Driving. Fooling around.

No ‘what ifs’. No promises. Just,

“Leave the light on if you can’t sleep. If I manage to sneak out of the Old fuck, I’ll pick you up. I won’t stop kissing you until dawn”

Because Steve was gonna leave. Wasn’t going to throw a single glance behind his back. That was the plan.

And he did. He did. But––

He spins Billy out. Tugs him back. When their chests bump, his laugh explodes, bubbles up. Weightless. Happy. Because all that matters to him, to them, it’s between these four irregular walls now.

And God this, this, is Steve’s favorite part. 

–ended up coming back running, following the yellow lines. Hoping Billy was the one letting his light on this time.

Because the sun is gonna keep on shining. They can keep on dancing in here, in their weird, yellow, trapezoidal kitchen, for as long as they want. Hearts touching. Lips brushing. Bodies swaying, spinning, cutting through the golden light. 

[visionsofus]

For the mixtape: “death stranding” by chvrches?? Thanks

hi anon! thanks for the request ~ I hope you enjoy!

| read on AO3 here | mixtape playlist | send me an ask with your song/prompt request |  

track #10: Death Stranding by CHVRCHES 

synopsis: Wanda and Vision spend the night at a glitzy party for a mission and get jealous when they see each other with other people. Pre-CW

“Is this all really necessary?” Wanda asked, slipping her usual rings onto her fingers to retain a little bit of her everyday look.

“Of course, it’s necessary,” Nat said past the bobby pins in her mouth as she pinned up the last few strands of Wanda’s hair. “You’re going to the Hamptons; anything less will make you stand out.”

Wanda sighed but turned slightly to the mirror to take in what she was wearing. It was a rare pleasure getting dressed up like this, even if it was for work. She’d worried that she’d grown too recognisable in her year since joining the team but gazing at herself now she doubted anyone would think she was an Avenger. She’d chosen her dress from a selection that had arrived at the compound earlier that week for this specific occasion. Of course, it was no ordinary dress, the boddice was bullet proof and though the skirts appeared normal, dropping from her hips to the floor with several slits at the front and sides, Wanda had been told which button to press that would make the flimsy material snap its Kevlar protectively around her legs. It wasn’t as though she was going to go into this sting operation unprepared.

A soft rap came at the door right as Nat finished pressing pins into Wanda’s scalp.

“We’re ready,” Nat called over her shoulder admiring her work.

Steve stepped in, decked in a charcoal suit, sunglasses pushed up to rest on his hair. “Looking lovely, Wanda,” Steve said raising his hand to tip an imaginary hat to her, “we leave in half an hour.”

“I too, am ready,” Vision said his voice entering the room as he phased through the solid wall to their right.

Wanda raised her eyebrows at his unannounced arrival. “Captain Rogers was standing in the doorway…” Vision began but trailed off when he caught sight of her properly.

Wanda turned in her chair to admire Vision. He was dressed in a white suit with a pale pink and gold tie, holding the matching ivory jacket in one hand.

“Make sure you rehearse your cover stories, we don’t need any careless slip ups tonight,” Steve reminded him as he looked at his watch once more. “Nat and I are going to head to the jet, meet us down there.”

“We are?” Nat asked, as Steve tugged her out of the room without another word, door shutting behind them.

“You look beautiful,” Vision said reaching out to help her up. Wanda rested a hand on his arm and pushed herself to her feet, remarkably steady despite the outrageous heels. She liked the height they gave her but was quite sure her feet wouldn’t be enjoying things by the end of the night. At least they had a thick enough heel that she might be able to run or fight if need be. Hopefully things wouldn’t come to that.

“You look rather dashing yourself,” Wanda replied, giving Vision another once over. She could have sworn that there were silver threads running through the white of his suit, but it could have just been the harsh lighting distorting her gaze. At the compliment Vision’s gaze dropped to the floor, a happy smile about his lips.

“You remember our aliases?” Wanda prompted, walking over to her dressing table where she’d placed the necklace she wanted to complete her look with. She held it out to Vision, turning around so he could help her with the clasp. His hands were cool against the back of her neck as he delicately swept her hair aside.  

“Of course,” Vision replied stepping around to face her once the necklace was fastened, “I am Viktor Walkins and you are my partner Emilia Williams.”

“Exactly,” Wanda said turning for the door and leading him through the compound as she spoke, “Emilia Williams, 26, a post-graduate art student at RISD. My main focus is on the art of human anatomy, body paint, that sort of thing.”

Vision held the front door open for her and she smiled at him as she stepped outside. He continued their cover story. “Which explains my appearance,” he gestured to himself and Wanda watched as he bent the nanotech of his body to his will, “I am one of your models.”

Wanda had been expecting a new look from Vision, he’d been experimenting more with phasing, but nothing this detailed. His complexion remained the same, but little leaves and branches now extended up his neck, dipping below his collar as the same thing happened to his hands. Wanda resisted the urge to reach out and trace her fingers along the delicate gold whirls arcing over his cheeks. He was a piece of art.  

“Colour me impressed,” she said smiling as he led the way to the landing bay.  

Wanda felt out of her depth as soon as they arrived at the front gates to the mansion where the operation was to take place. The mission itself was simple enough, get close to their target, John A. Sterling a young-ish weapons distributor who had been attempting to recreate old Stark weapons, and get him on record saying where the next meeting was to take place. Wanda thought it was strange how public the underground weapons industry was, they certainly relished in having a good party. According to their sources, Sterling always attended things like this to catch new prospective buyers, inviting them to a private party at the end of a month. Wanda and Vision’s job was to either secure an invite themselves, or at the very least catch someone else getting one.

That wasn’t the difficult part, really. She didn’t doubt that with Vision’s help they’d secure the location by the end of the night. No, the real challenge was the party ahead of her.

She leant heavily on Vision’s arm as they walked up the marble stairs and into an actual ballroom. Wanda had only ever seen things like this on TV. The crowd was a swirling mass of glitz and wealth. It resonated with immorality and fraud and it was a good thing Vision took the lead because she felt minutes away from running away from the horror before her.

They walked around the edge of the decadent room, stopping finally at a table of canapes and fading into the background as one of many couples milling about the food.

“I have eyes on him,” Wanda said quietly pretending to straighten the lapel of Vision’s already impeccable suit.

“Take your time getting close,” Steve’s voice crackled in his ear, “we don’t want to scare him off.”

“I’m not scary,” Wanda huffed, grinning at Vision but he was keeping his eyes on the crowd, watching their target dancing. “I’ll just go and dance with him.”

“Go slow, and if you have the opportunity to get close, plant the mic on him,” Steve reminded her before going quiet.

“I think I’d rather you just scare him,” Vision said his eyes narrowing at the figure moving through the crowd. Wanda tilted her head but decided not to question what he meant and instead turned back to the crowd.

“He’s on the move,” she murmured, placing her hand at Vision’s elbow once more and casually starting to move around the room. She followed the example of couples they passed, smiling at those whose eyes were unable to avoid Vision’s glamour, though his appearance was on par with the cosmetics of some guests.  

Sterling had left the floor with his wife and was making his way to the spread of tables and seats at the back of the ballroom. Wanda paused briefly to collect a plate and some canapes so that they might fit in better and then led the way to a table near their target couple.

Vision gave her a look that said he thought they had gotten too close, but she shook her head imperceptibly and sat him down next to her. The tables were mere feet apart, but she had positioned them so that their backs were to the Sterling’s, whilst being close enough to listen in on their conversation.

“… too warm tonight,” she heard Sterling say gruffly.

“John, stop complaining,” came his wife’s short reply.

Wanda pushed the small food about her plate, feeling too on edge to eat. Vision was sitting unnaturally beside her, his head too high as he glanced around suspiciously.  

“You look too nervous,” she whispered, lifting a champagne flute to her lips and pretending to take a sip. She also wasn’t going to let alcohol dull her senses tonight. Vision snapped his eyes to her, and she was shocked to see his demeanour change almost immediately. He sat further back in the chair, smoothly crossing a leg over one knee and leaning closer to her chair, an arm slouched haphazardly at her back.

“Better?” he whispered back, his head now much too close to hers, she felt his warm breath on her neck.

“Yep,” Wanda murmured, this time taking a legitimate drink.  

They remained sat behind the unsuspecting couple until they rose once more to join the crowd milling about the ballroom floor. Wanda’s eyes snapped to Vision’s and she gave him a look someone along the lines of trust me. At least she hoped that’s what her face said because he looked shocked as she abruptly stood up, spinning and walking straight into their target.

“Oh my goodness!” She gasped delicately, bringing her hands to her mouth in shock as Sterling was forced to stagger back slightly. Wanda tried not to cringe at the warmness her hand was met with when she patted the man’s shoulder in apology. “I am so sorry.”

All those months working on her American accent with Nat was worth it all for this moment, her intonation was perfect.

Sterling had steadied himself and looked fit to argue until he looked up and saw precisely who had run into him. Wanda gave him her best apologetic smile. “Oh that’s, quite alright.” His hand went absentmindedly to his hair, running a hand through it.

“I don’t believe we’ve met,” Sterling’s wife piped up, standing up from the table and extending a hand to Wanda.

“Emilia Williams,” Wanda smiled shaking her hand delicately, “I am here in my father’s place.”

“Your father, Williams you say,” Sterling murmured with false understanding as though he were familiar with the man, which was of course impossible considering he was a fictional father.

“Say,” Wanda said turning a hopeful, yet shy, gaze to John Sterling, “I don’t suppose you can dance; my partner doesn’t like dancing.” Vision scowled from where he was still sitting.

“Well as a matter of fact, we were just about to join the floor again.” John looked at his wife for permission, “you don’t mind do you darling?”

“Not at all,” Ms Sterling replied, her gaze on Vision, “I’ll be quite happy sitting here and talking with this fascinating figure, I’m sure.”

To her dismay, Wanda had to take the arm Sterling offered as they made their way out to the dance floor.

“How has your father been?” Sterling asked as they stopped in an open space, Wanda taking one of his hands while the other came to rest at her waist. It amused her that he was still pretending to know the fictional man she had created, but all for networking she supposed.

“Oh he’s doing well, he just wasn’t feeling up to this evening and I was more than happy to come in his stead,” Wanda said sweetly as they starting to dance slowly. “He speaks of you often, always talking about the good work you do.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” Sterling said graciously dipping his head, but Wanda knew she’d pressed the right button to direct the conversation where she needed it to go.

The music picked up and the dancing became livelier, and she had to focus on keeping up with her dance partner. Over his shoulder she spotted Vision still stranded with Mrs Sterling, who appeared to have gotten quite touchy in investigating the paint on his body. Vision was in the midst of rolling up his shirt sleeve to the elbow so that she could see more clearly, and Wanda’s heart tightened with irrational jealousy. She mentally reprimanded herself, she had no right to be possessive. Instead, she focused on the task at hand, she needed to get more out of Sterling and the sooner the better judging from the friendliness of his hands.

“Such terrible disasters happening in California this week,” she said in an attempt to make small talk.

“Dreadful,” he replied shortly, and Wanda resisted the urge to step on his toes a few times as his gaze dipped too low.

“I almost wish I had a better way to protect my family, if such things begin happening further north,” Wanda said contemplatively and tried not to bristle at how quickly his eyes snapped up to meet hers. Now he was paying attention.

“It’s important,” he murmured more quietly, “that we can all protect ourselves in these troubling times.”

“My father agrees,” Wanda sighed forlornly, “but alas we don’t really have any good contacts in that sort of industry.”

They were quiet a little longer and Wanda feared she had pressed too far. Regardless, the conversation had made him serious enough that she’d had an opportunity to drop one of her rings, one with a microphone within the gemstone, into his pocket as the dance swapped directions and they traded hands. Mic planted.

“I have special parties each month,” he began slowly, “if you are interested, I could put you and your father on the guest list for July.”

Wanda let herself smile I surprise and excitement. “Really? My father would be so grateful.”

Back among the tables, Vision was trying to figure out why he had grown so irritable all of a sudden. It was really interfering with the flattery he was currently delivering to Mrs Sterling whilst Wanda was busy out on the floor with their weapons distributor. He kept one eye on the spinning couple, growing frustrated at how easily the man was touching her.  

“Gosh this paint is just divine,” Mrs Sterling said, fawning over his glamoured skin, “she is quite remarkable.”

“I know,” Vision said not thinking as the words left his mouth and the tenderness that went along with them.

Mrs Sterling smiled wryly at him. “Don’t give up yet. A nice man like you? She’s sure to fall eventually.”

“Pardon?” Vision choked out, wondering what on earth had given the woman the impression that he and Wanda were anything more than platonic.

“Oh you know what I mean,” she waved a hand and laughed lightly, “shall we go rescue her from my husband?”

Vision looked at the woman with new appreciation and offered his hand to help her to his feet. “You know, I think you’re right, I am suddenly in the mood to dance.”

“That’s the right attitude,” she said patting his arm affectionately as he led her onto the dance floor.

“John,” Mrs Sterling called out, waving a hand as he and Wanda spun past, “give this young man a chance, will you?”

It seemed they were too far away to hear, and John was decidedly preoccupied by his dance partner. Vision caught Wanda’s eyes and she tilted her chin down slightly. It was done.

“Thank you for your charming conversation,” Vision said patting the back of Mrs Sterling’s hand at his arm, “but I had best get to her.”

Vision arrived just in time to see Wanda spin in time with other dancers and reached out a hand to catch hers before she could spin back into Sterling’s grasp.

“Oh,” she said softly, as his hand came to rest at her back, steadying her.

“You’ll have to excuse me, Mr Sterling,” Wanda said apologetically, “it seems my partner is finally ready to dance, it was lovely chatting with you.”

Mrs Sterling was at his arm in a moment, coaxing her husband away from the dance floor.

“I’m glad thatis done,” Wanda sighed, turning towards Vision once the other couple was out of sight. “Mic planted, and hopefully Cap will get news of a personal invitation for Emilia Williams by the end of the night.”

“Excellent work,” Vision said taking her hands and putting them on his shoulders.

“What are you doing?” Wanda asked slowly, but she didn’t pull away.

“It would look suspicious if we left now,” Vision said, “so I am dancing.”

“I didn’t know you could dance.”

“While Natasha gave you your lessons, Steve gave me mine.”

“Huh,” Wanda murmured in surprise but stepped into the music with him, their feet moving in synchronicity, taking them around the other pairs about the floor.

It was different, being with her like this. But Vision enjoyed the closeness. In the past they had been physically affectionate without thinking about it but Vision was becoming more conscious of exactly how often they reached for each other, and what was worse, he was beginning to question his own reasons behind it. He rarely thought of ignorance as something good but there was a nagging feeling to this situation, an apprehension that if he examined the emotions he felt around Wanda there would be no going back.

Steve’s voice crackled to life in Vision’s head, “good job you two, get out when you can.”

“Sure thing,” Wanda murmured but made no move to leave the dance floor. When she saw Vision’s questioning gaze she smiled. “You wanted to dance right? It would be a shame the let those lessons go to waste.”

“Yes, it would be a shame,” he said absentmindedly, overly conscious of her hand resting at the nape of his neck.

“You seemed to be getting on well with Mrs Sterling,” Wanda said, her gaze a little distant as she looked determinedly over his shoulder.

“No more than was necessary,” Vision replied and then felt a little silly for saying it in such an assuring way, what did Wanda care if he had been friendly with their target? After all, it wasn’t as though she had done anything different. “You didn’t seem in a hurry to get away from Sterling.”

Wanda huffed in frustration and Vision felt bad for pushing further.

“It was part of the job,” she explained through her teeth trying to keep a smile on as they danced past chattering bystanders, “at least I wasn’t rolling my sleeves up and showing off my muscles.”

Vision actually sputtered. “That is not what I was doing.”

“Could have fooled me,” Wanda shrugged smiling pleasantly, but her refusal to look at him showed more.

He sighed wishing he hadn’t teased her or gotten onto this line of conversation. “I did not want for us to argue.”

“And what did you want?” Wanda said, her voice a dare asking for the truth, her eyes a constant on his and Vision resisted the urge to look away, maintaining her steel gaze.

“I want to be honest,” he said quietly and when Wanda didn’t prompt him, he continued speaking. “I’m afraid of saying something that might change things between us.”

Us.The word hung between them as an unspoken truth. They hadn’t acknowledged the possibility that they were becoming something other than Vision and Wanda, that perhaps there was a third alternative where they were something more.

“I’d rather honesty, even if it changes things.”

“As silly as it sounds,” he began hesitantly, “I was jealous, seeing you dancing out here without me. It irritated me that I had been shrugged off in favour of that man, even if it was for the mission.”

Wanda smiled and raised a hand to his cheek, his skin warmed as she brushed her palm over the intricate gold ‘paint’ still on his face. “It was not a choice I was making, but if I’d had to choose you could have no doubt it would be you.”

Vision resisted the urge to close his eyes and lean into her palm, trying to focus on the understanding in her gaze. “I was jealous too, watching you with her.”

“That has to mean something doesn’t it,” Vision said, his voice barely above a whisper as Wanda moved imperceptibly closer, his hand moved comfortably around her back as they slowed to a stop.

“It does,” she smiled and nodded, and Vision felt a wave of relief emanating out of him that they were on the same page. “The truth is out in the open now I suppose, no going back.”

“I think I’d rather look forward,” he said and slowly pulled them towards the outskirts of the ballroom and to a stop. Wanda’s cheeks were pink from the dancing and her eyes were light as she turned to him.

“So, we’ll just see what happens?”

“I’d like that,” Vision said keeping a tight grip on her hand, reluctant to let her go just yet. They went to leave the ballroom and once out in the night air he shrugged his suit jacket off and let it rest around Wanda’s shoulders. With one arm around her waist and the other holding her hand they left the faux cheer of the ballroom behind. The evening had been an adventure and a step out of his comfort zone, but Vision was as eager as Wanda was for home, to be back in the space they both knew so well and to relish in the step they had taken, to dream of all that was to come and all that they might be.

[smutsonian]

Deep Web - 02

Pairing: The Winter Soldier x Reader

Summary: he pays her a visit

Warning/s:  not proofread, cursing, violence, brainwashing (buckeroo), please be warned

Word Count: 2149

A/N: I lied 😭 there’s no smut in this one but it’s dark...ish?

Chapter One

“The asset has not completed his mission yet. It’s been almost a month. You think the Captain is still trying to get ahold of him? Shall we put the asset back on the chair?” 

“Remind me what his mission is again?”

“The Y/L/N girl”

“Ah… Yes. Y/N. Pretty girl. Too bad… I don’t think the Captain has anything to do with this. I think the asset has gone... soft.”

“What shall we do then?”

“Put him on the chair. If he still fails to finish the mission, take care of the girl yourself.” 

—-

Agonizing screams filled the room as the man in the green uniform recited a bunch of words to the asset. The asset screamed in agony as the brainwashing continued. 

After a long and painful hours later, the asset stared into nothing with an indistinguishable expression. His mind blanked after another session on the infamous horrifying chair. It happens every time he fails to complete a mission. It happens every time he gets a glimpse of the past. Of who he used to be. At the end of the day, he always forgets who he was. Who he is. Who Steve is. But something happened. One thing stayed put this time around...

“Kill the girl, asset. If you fail to complete the mission, we’ll have someone else do the work for you and then you’ll face your punishment.” 

The asset’s face remained unbothered but he did offer a faint nod.

“You have forty-eight hours.”

“Are those comfortable?” Richard gives Y/N a playful smirk as he points at her visible toes that wiggles under his scrutinizing eyes. 

“They’re flip-flops, Richard.” Y/N gives him a bored look but then it twists into a smirk as she adds, “Of course they’re fucking comfortable!” Both shared a laugh with each other and then calmed down after a minute or so. “Don’t your feet get cold?” Richard asks as he fiddles with a cash register while Y/N’s leaning her elbows on the counter. When Y/N gives him a shrug, he lets out a sigh and continues. “You know, you can always answer your mother’s call. Or your father’s.” And as if on cue, Y/N’s phone starts to ring and her mother’s name plasters on her phone screen.

Y/N groans as she rejects the call. “I’m not having this conversation with you, Richard.” Richard hangs his head as he sports a sad look. “I know I’m just a mere worker but I’m just looking out for you, kid.” 

Y/N stands upright from leaning down the counter and gives Richard a concerned look. “Richard, I-I didn’t mean it like that!” She stumbles with her words as she places a hand on his shoulder. Richard gives him a small smile and nods a little. “I know… You’ve changed a lot, kid. It’s a good change.” Richard’s face then contorts into a surprised look as he raises an index finger. “I almost forgot!” He fiddles with the cash register once again and takes out an envelope, giving it to Y/N. “This is for you.”

Y/N squints her eyes as she takes the envelope. She shakes her head when she sees at least 3 big fat wads of cash inside and looks up at Richard who’s sporting a cheeky smile. “My parents put you up to this?” She frowns at him as he shrugs. He raises both his hands in mock surrender as he walks away from her. “I literally have no idea what you’re talking about.” Richard then proceeds to go to the back door, leaving a fuming Y/N behind.

As Y/N finishes up cleaning a table, Richard walks up to her with four more envelopes in his hands. “Go home, Y/N. Your shift was done five minutes ago. Also, these are for you. Okay. Bye-bye! Use ‘em wisely!” He shoves the envelopes in her hands and proceeds to push her out the door. Y/N huffs as he closes the door behind her and waves at her with a perky smile.

“What the fuck, Richard?” Y/N exclaims as she looks down at the envelopes that consists of at least a thousand dollars. No doubt from her parents.

—-

Y/N walks the regular path to her home sweet trashy home when she finally notices the car that’s been following her since she left McDonald’s. 

She scoffs and stops walking just in front of a trash bin. She takes all the envelope from her bag and then dumps them into the bin. She turns to look back at the car, who now has a guy peering out of the car’s window with a camera pointed towards her direction.

She gives the guy a snarky smile as she raises both her hands up in the air and flips both her middle finger up. She’s a hundred percent sure that this was another guy that her parents hired to look after her in a very creepy stalker kind of way.

“Tell my parents to fuck off!” She laughs as the guy drives away from her with an incredulous expression etched on his face.

—-

 Walking into her apartment, Y/N sighed in exhaustion as she throws her bag on the side of the door. She flicks the lights on and freezes when she sees a dark figure hidden in the shadows just across the room.

The figure walks towards her ever so slowly, making them seem more intimidating. When the light managed to hit the figure (who turns out to be a guy), a glimmer was caught just by his arm. Just to be exact, his whole arm glimmered under the light. A shocked gasp escapes Y/N’s lips as she unconsciously walks backward, pressing her back against the closed door.

“Hey… Listen… I didn’t know that my payment w-went through so I-I just thought that it’s fake- I just thought that you’re not gonna show up anymore, you know?” Y/N tries to do what she does best, open her mouth. She tries to negotiate (as politely as she could) with the assassin she hired from the deep web months ago but he only tilts his head to the side, giving her the idea that he couldn’t understand her.

She continues to talk her way out of the situation. To let him understand whatever she’s trying to say by using big hand gestures. “You don’t h-have to kill- to assassinate me anymore. You can keep the money! It’s all just a misunderstanding, really!” 

She gulps when the assassin continues to walk towards her. “I-I could a-add more! L-Listen I h-have a few d-dollars just d-down the street. B-believe it o-or not, I k-keep my cash in a trash bin! There’s a-at least f-five hundred grand there. It’s all yours!” 

Fuck! He’s not stopping. Why is he not stopping?!

Y/N panics when she sees the hopelessness in her position. Having no other choice, she does the most pathetic thing there is on the books.

“What the fuck is that?!” 

Y/N looks towards the space behind the assassin, widening her eyes as she points her index finger at it. The assassin surprisingly falls for the trick and turns around to look at what caught the girl’s attention.

Using it as her chance, she fumbles with the doorknob as quickly as she can but before she could even get out, her body gets slammed against the door, forcing it to shut with a boom.

“No”

Y/N’s feels her heart thump loudly as the assassin speaks for the first time while he pushes his body up against hers towards the door.

“Fuck! Dude! I fucking swear! I can pay you! Please! I changed my mind! I don’t want to die! I don’t want to die!” Y/N blabbers loudly, desperately trying to break free from his iron grip.

The assassin covers her mouth using his flesh hand and shushes her harshly. He drags her body away from the door, backing them both up until they reached the cluttered bedroom. All the while Y/N writhed against him.

He grunts as he throws her on the mattress, looking at her with a hard glare. His glowering eyes dared her to make a move. She stays in place as she tries to even out her breathing, tears forming in her eyes. She watches him as he walks around the room, opening drawers, looking underneath tables and chairs as if he’s looking for something. He cautiously hides his face behind the curtains as he looks out the window.

“W-what are you looking f-for?” She manages to ask.

He only lets out a grunt as he turns to look at her with a ferocious look. He stalks towards her on the bed as she lets out a strangled cry, wrapping her arms around her head in an attempt to shield herself from him.

He hastily pries her arms open, pinning them to her sides. He nudges her nose with his as she keeps looking down. She stares at him with glossy and teary eyes, trying to swallow her own sobs. “Please…”

“Quiet” was his second word for the day. He gets off of her and walks towards the end of the bed. She gasps as he pulls on her ankles until her back is flat against the mattress. 

He messes with her top until it’s completely off, leaving her in just her bra. She looks up at him, whispering desperate pleas, pleading him to stop whatever it is that he’s planning on doing.

He huffs, vexed and places his flesh hand on her neck, enough to leave a big bruise but not enough to cut off her airway. 

Frightened, she trashes under him while she helplessly kicks everywhere. She manages to knee him on his crotch which caused both of them to pause. She looks at him with fearful eyes as he looks at her furiously.

He shakes his head as he adds pressure on his hand that’s placed on her neck, grimacing as marks started appearing on her skin. She looks down and notices the forming of bruises. Taking a deep breath, she gives up on fighting and just lets the assassin do what he’s doing. 

Looking at her with a softer look, he gives her a small smile (or at least tries to). “Sorry” he mumbles under his breath.

Y/N furrows her eyebrows in terror and confusion as she watches him remove his hand on her and watches it as it goes up into the air and straight down her face.

Before she even knew it, she’s knocked out cold.

——

The asset looks down at the girl, his eyes holding a glint of sadness, guilt, and worry. He takes the device given to him by HYDRA and takes a picture of the upper part of her body, making sure to show her injuries. He’s got to make it look convincing...

The photo shows the ugly bruise forming on her neck and the blood sipping out of her cut bottom lip. Her head is jerked into an awkward position. Her face is covered with dry tears. Overall, she looks dead. As if she was strangled or choked to death.

The asset lets out a breath as he hits send on the device. Not a minute later, a vibration from the device was felt and a reply from his leader appears on the screen.

‘Great job, asset.’

——

The asset gets seated on the chair every time he gets a glimpse of the past. Of who he used to be. At the end of the day, he always forgets who he was. Who who is. Who Steve is. But something happened. One thing stayed put this time around. One face persisted.

Her face…

Y/N.

He was told to kill the girl. He was supposed to kill her but why couldn’t he do it? He’s killed a lot of people before. How is she different from any of them? 

He couldn’t even hurt her with his metal arms. He couldn’t lay a finger on her with that godforsaken arm. He only did what he did to make HYDRA believe that he’s done his job. And it worked.

He made sure that her awful home is safe. He made sure that there are no hidden cameras implanted by HYDRA. He made sure that no other HYDRA agents are lurking around her home, her neighborhood. It’s as if his body is telling him not to hurt her. It’s as if his mind is telling him to protect the girl. 

The thought of her made his mind and his body comply with each other for once. 

Could this be a chance for his redemption? Could she give him the chance of redemption? Could she save him or will it be her who needs saving from him?

--- 

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[stevesnailbat]

Hey!! Can you do a fic where (y/n) is Steve’s little sister who is friends with the Party and is rlly protective over her bc their parents are trash so he feels like he has to take the father position?? Somehow involve a family history w examples of him doing that and then leading up to something during s1 where he learns ab the demogorgan?? Like a “why didn’t u tell me” situation?

warnings: nothing really, some swearing and some of old King Steve’s attitude, but mainly just protective!Steve.

word count: 1.4K

a/n: Requests are open, please send me ideas for any ST character you want!

Being King Steve’s little sister had its perks, but some of the time it sucked more than it was good. People were always nice to Y/N in class, usually asking about Steve or talking about how good he played at the basketball games; they never really asked about her. Steve soaked up all the attention, a cocky grin growing across his face whenever she would complain about boys only talking about him to her on their way home from school. He would usually end up feeling bad for her having to put up with the annoying people at school, so he would make it up to her by taking her out for ice cream or dinner. Y/N had grown to appreciate the times her and her brother spent together alone, because when they were in public was when he would turn into a grade-A douchebag.

Even though Steve played himself off as a cocky, popular dude in school, he was still a sucker for his little sister and would do anything to make sure she was safe. He always made sure she got home safe after school, always checked up on her when she was feeling down, and to her annoyance, always made sure she went to bed before ten on school nights. Steve felt obligated to take over as a father figure for Y/N when he got into middle school and began to notice his parents not picking up the slack like they should have been. He realized that they didn’t pay attention to either him or Y/N, but it took more of a toll on her, since she was younger.

The only time their parents seemed to be around was for their so-called “family dinner” they would have twice a month. Steve saw it as their way of saying they were good parents who didn’t just order pizza or have them make microwave dinners every night, which is what they did every other night besides these two days out of the month. Their dad would grill Steve and Y/N with random, awkward questions about school, sports and clubs because he had no idea what they were actually doing outside of going to class.

“So are you still in that...video thing, Y/N?” their mom asked one time, trying to break the uncomfortable silence.

“Yes mom, I’m still in AV club.” Y/N replied in a shy voice, knowing what was coming next.

“You’re still hanging around all those boys every day after school then? The weird, nerdy ones who ride their bikes around all the time?” their dad would chime in, disappointment prevalent in his tone.

She only nodded, not really knowing how to defend herself against her judgmental parents.

“She like the kids, so why does it matter if you think they’re weird? It’s not like they’re hurting her or anything.” Steve replies in a protective, yet casual way.

Both of their parents become flustered yet annoyed, deciding to drop the conversation with a quiet ‘guess it doesn’t matter’ from their dad. Conversations like this seemed too common at the dinner table; they would make some snide remark about what the kids were doing and either Y/N or Steve would stick up for the other, trying to make them feel better. It got old after a while, but it just seemed to be something to get used to.

Y/N was the only girl in her friend group, the party, but she didn’t mind; Steve minded, though. Steve noticed one of them, Dustin, always making eyes at Y/N and would tell him to back off every once in a while. When he would come pick her up from the Wheeler’s and Dustin would walk with her to the door, Steve would give him warning looks which would cause him to call Steve an asshole under his breath every time. Y/N would try to give Steve a taste of his own medicine when he started hanging around Nancy, giving her dirty looks when she would see them together. It didn’t work, though. Y/N grew to like Nancy because she thought she made Steve better, into more of a normal boy and into less of a douchebag-ish King Steve.

Everything took a turn for the worst when November hit. Will went missing and things got rocky between Nancy and Steve. Steve reverted to his old, douchebag self to save the family’s reputation from being tarnished and left his sister in the dust. Not that she even realized it, though. She was busy looking for Will every night. When they met Eleven, Y/N would stay at Mike’s house trying to comfort her or get some information out of her. The two grew closer as time went on, Y/N seemed to be the only person besides Mike that Eleven would even speak to. Lucas and Dustin would play some games or nap in the basement while Y/N and Mike would talk El’s ear off, trying to make her feel comfortable, for hours until Steve would come pounding down the door looking for her.

“Why are you going over there so much anyways? You aren’t playing any campaigns right now obviously.” Steve snapped when they got back to Loch Nora from the Wheeler’s as Y/N sat in the passenger seat with tears in her eyes.

“I miss my friend okay? Me and the party actually want to find him or find out what happened to him! You don’t care that one of my best friends just disappeared into thin air and you don't even care that Barb disappeared from our house that night. All you care about is mom and dad finding out about the beers and cigarettes you had, you jerk. I thought you would be a helpful and understanding older brother in situations like this, but obviously not.” Y/N says before stomping out of the car as Steve parked in the garage.

He doesn’t follow her, doesn’t try to apologize, doesn’t leave the car. He had no idea what to say, but he begins to realize what an asshole he really is. But that didn’t stop him from avoiding Y/N the next morning or from getting the living shit beat out of him by Jonathan Byers the next day during their argument.

Things grew clearer to Steve when he tried to apologize to his girlfriend and ended up having to fight some crazy ass, other world monster in the Byer’s house with a nail bat. He had come full-circle in a week and realized how shitty he really had been, to Y/N especially.

Being reunited with Y/N in the Hawkins hospital was emotional for both of them. Steve rushed to there as soon as the god awful monster was taken care of, hoping and praying that Y/N was okay. When he got there, he saw her along side the party, huddled against each other. When she makes eye contact with Steve, she runs to him with tears brimming her eyes. Y/N sobbed in his arms, her body weak from exhaustion as she wrapped her arms around his neck. Steve held her close and kept repeating ‘I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry’ to her over and over again as he rubber her shoulder soothingly. After a few minutes of hushed crying and whispers, Steve pulls them apart and holds her cheeks in his hands, wiping some of her tears away.

“You got the shit beat out of you.” she says, touching the bruised pink and purple skin near his eye, making him flinch lightly.

“Yeah because my little sister decided not to tell me that there was a monster on the loose in Hawkins.” he jokes in return, ruffling her hair lightly.

“I don’t think those are from a monster, I think you actually got beat up and just don’t want to admit it.” she remarks, eyes narrowing as she speaks.

“That...isn’t important right now. Why didn’t you tell me about what was actually going on?” he says as a slight tinge of red graces his cheeks from embarrassment.

“Because I knew you would freak, like you always do.” Y/N jokes.

Steve rolls his eyes and pulls her into another hug without saying another word, taking in the moment one last time. He was glad that he realized how much of an ass he really had been, but more importantly, he was glad that Y/N was safe. He could go back to being her protective, overbearing older brother who only wanted what was best for her, even if she couldn’t see that.

[polizwrites]

WIP Update - 6 July 2022

  A more successful week  - I touched 6 fics (1 WIP & 5 new works) for a total of  2291 words.   I posted the next chapter of my eventual Stuckony Star Wars AU WIP,  and kicked off a new  Stony Western AU  WIP with its first chapter.  I’ve also posted fics for the first three days of  the  @steverogersweek event:   a bit of pre-war Stucky fluff,   a domestic Stony ficlet  and a  Team Cap as family ficlet.    I also posted a WinterIron reflective free-verse-ish piece  for last week’s @flashfictionfridayofficial  prompt and a @starkbucksbingo square here on Tumblr.

I’m sitting at 8 active WIPs  (with a couple of maybe TBCs)  with my current   deadlines being the finish of the Steve Rogers Appreciation Week, and my submission for the @reforgedzine - which I haven’t done much more than think about as of yet.

See below cut for the WIPs  (arranged more or less by bingos/challenges/etc) I am working on  -   feel free to send me prompts or plot bunnies as well as asks regarding any of these projects   (or any other WIPs I’ve got out there) – they really help feed the Muse and keep me motivated!

Steve | Tony | Bucky Bingo Round 2 [STBB R2]  (Runs thru 30 Jun 2022)

Ended up with 21 squares filled with 16 fanfics  -  see my Masterpost for details

Avengers Bingo [AvB] (Runs thru 24 Dec)

Two  fills posted and 0 WIPs - I decided to further challenge myself by pairing up each square with a unique combo of 2 original MCU Avengers! With the help of the STB Enthusiasts Discord folks - I’ve got all 16 squares   planned out, at least in terms of who to write about, and half of them have some sort of idea or crossover square to go along with them. Feel free to toss other plot  bunnies my way…  

* A2 - On the Run  - Natasha & Steve - crossover with  MWAPB - Farmer’s Market?   post CA:CW Wakanda ?

*  A4 - Mutual Pining  - Steve/Thor - crossover with  MWAPB - Thor.

* A3 - Reunited  -   Clint & Natasha  -  Endgame Ronin scene?

* B1 - Death - possible crossover with  MWAP Crying square – post Snap Bruce & Steve  mourning?

*  B3 - Road Trip  -  Bruce & Thor  - Post Grandmaster, pre-Thanos  space shenanigans

*  C1 - Opposites Attract - Clint/Thor  - there was a fun Tumblr  headcanon going around about a Bumbling Foreigner whose ignorance of  local customs  results in him flirting with/proposing to the prince -  this seems like a perfect matchup!  

* C3 - Reincarnation AU  -  Natasha & Tony  - post-Endgame

* C4 - Bodyguard AU  -  Thor/Tony  -  young!Tony - crush on Cap plays into attraction  (obvious title - Thunderstruck)  - holding on this til next round of TSB.  

* D1 - Friends w/ Benefits  - Clint/Steve - crossover with MWAPB Hawkeye/Clint Barton.

D2 - Romeo & Juliet AU  -  basic idea:  Steve (jock) & Tony  (geek) trying out for title roles in R&J - despite their respective  friend groups thinking it’s a terrible idea.  Both cliques end up  becoming friends.  

*  D3 - Bed Sharing  -  Bruce/Natasha - AoU compliant.

Man With a Plan (Steve Rogers) Bingo [MWAPB] (Runs thru 31 Dec)

Six fills, 1 WIPs and several Vague Ideas/potential cross fills with other bingos.  Prompts cheerfully accepted!  

* B2 - Next Door Neighbors  - filled this with Chapter 1 of Come Down From Your Fences  (And Open the Gate) which came in at 765 words. 

* B3 - Farmer’s Market  - see  AvB On the Run above

* B4 - Powerless AU  - if Sunqueen and I decide to continue   Wrong Number, Right Call ,  this would be a good fit.  

* B5 - “I don’t really want to wake up just yet.”  - this would probably be a good fit with Chapter 5 of   Takin’ What They’re Givin’ (‘Cause I’m Workin’ for a Livin’) which has been stalled for a bit at 747 right in the middle of a smutty scene.  Planning to circle back to this next month.  

* I1 - Steve is here for TFAtWS  - this might go well with my BBB  “Oh, hell no"  square - Steve trolling  Bucky & Sam by sending the old man in with his shield?  (moodboard & ficlet?)

* I2 - Found Family  - filled this with Ain’t No Party Like a ‘Saved the Universe’ Party  which came in at   1546 words.   

* I3 - Thor  - see AvB Mutual Pining above

* I5 - Dogsitting - possible crossover with  BBB “Run”  square - Steve & Bucky dogsitting for Lucky?  (moodboard + ficlet)

* N1 - School AU/Teacher AU  - if I decide to continue on with Technicalities (see Stucky Bingo  College AU above)  - I could fill this square  :: ponders::

* N3 - Online shopping - this might be fun as a crossover with BBB Thighs …?  (even tho lingerie is a “nah” for me) Steve and Tony buying a new wardrobe for Bucky  that show off his ass-ets?

* G4 - Canon Divergence post CA:TWS - possible  crossover with BBB  Kill List Bucky wreaking havoc on Hydra bases and  Steve & Sam catch up with him

* O1 - Crying - see AvB Death square above

*  O2 - Sex Pollen  -  Teenage Groot pollen =  aphrodisiac  hi-jinks. Quill & Gamora  warn the  couple (stucky)/throuple (Stuckony)  ahead of time, so no  dub-con.

* O3 - Hawkeye/Clint Barton  -  see AvB - Friends w/ Benefits  above.

StarkBucks Bingo - Round 3  (SBB_R3) - Ends 31 Dec

1 fills, 0 WIPs and 2 vague ideas - need to see what potential crossfills I can come up with. 

* I4 - Canon: Avengers Academy  - will probably do Stuffed Marvels sketches of Tony and Winter, as I know very little about the game/canon. 

* G1 - Flower crown - came up with an idea to go along with a past Flash Fiction Friday prompt: Dancing in Sunshowers: Bucky making a crown for Morgan - not sure whether to do as moodboard or ficlet (or a combo)

* G5 - “I’ll catch you.” Wrote  Salvaging Icarus  - a double drabble for this square and last week’s @flashfictionfridayofficial prompt:  [#FFF159 Pride Before The Fall].  Will post to Ao3 sometime next week.

Bucky Barnes Bingo - Round 4 [BBB_R4] (Runs thru 7 Jan 2023)

Nine fills and  two WIPs -  looks like I’m already in good shape to start with  a Row 4 and/or Column K bingo!

* B3 - Sam Wilson|Falcon - this would be a good candidate for a continuation of After One Or Two False Starts

* U2 - AU: Roommate  - Still wanting to use the Meet Ugly prompt: 02. I bought a house three months ago but I’m finally moving in and discover you’ve been squatting because you’re homeless    – probably WinterHawk with  recovering!Bucky being the squatter in Clint’s apartment building.  

* U4 - AU: Arranged Marriage - will probably pick Lady Natasha’s Consort and Lord Steve’s Companion  back up for this one.  

* U5 - Kill List -  see MWAP  - G4 - Canon Divergence.  Post CA:TWS above

* C2 - “Oh, hell no” - possible crossover with MWAP I1 - Steve is here for TFaWS

* C4 - KINK: Aftercare -  probably holding onto this until the TSB bingo 😁

* K1 - Thighs - possible crossover with MWAP: N3 - Online Shopping.   We had some fun in the Discord Bingo Party last weekend combining these prompts with Summer Holiday - here’s my summary:  Thanks to the wonders of the internet,   Sam had found the perfect outfit for his boyfriend to wear during their beach holiday – a high cut brief-style swimsuit - grey with a red star on one hip.   It would show off his thighs of betrayal perfectly.

* K2 - Comics - sew the  Stuffed Marvel Classic Comics Bucky Barnes I drew up last month.  

* K3 - KINK: Edging  - I have a smutty WinterIron idea for this - combining with TSB KINK: Orgasm Denial/Edging. 

* Y1 - “Do you trust me?” -  Using this for Chapter 5 of Takin’ What They’re Givin’ (‘Cause I’m Workin’ for a Livin’) - Mission Four: Pour Some Sugar: Part 2.   Chapter 5 picks up mid-sexytimes with Steve and Bucky and is currently sitting at 705 words. Current Last Line:  [a little too NSFW]

* Y2 - Never the fall that kills you -  this might be the title for the remix I want to do of   Seeds of Love  (by the super-talented @hddnone). Crossing over with My TSB Secret Admirer square & may combined with a reverse hanahaki prompt from @lacrimula-falsa​   just for funsies.

* Y3 - “Run”  -  see MWAP I5 - Dogsitting above.

* ADOPTED1 - Peggy Carter - possible crossover with with MWAP - G3 - USO Tour (Peggy regaling Bucky with stories of Steve’s exploits while touring the US) or  N4 - Soulmates  (WW3some shenanigans!)

Steve Rogers Bingo - Round 2  (SRB_R2) - Ends 31 Jan

Five fills posted and two WIPs, thanks mostly to the @steverogersweek event!

* A2 - Team Cap  - Posted Team Cap, Reunited  this morning as a crossover with SGR Week Day 3: Family.   306 words of the Barbershop Quartet celebrating Bucky’s freedom from the trigger words. 

* A3 - Domestic  - Posted  Baby You Can Wear My Clothes as a crossover with SGR Week Day 2: Clothes.  223 words of Stony clothes-sharing. 

* D1 - Pre-War Era - Posted A Fan for His Fella as a crossover with SGR Week: Day 1 - Birthday.  277 words of Stucky birthday planning fluff.

* D3 - Body Painting - crossover with SGR Week: Day 6: Art I have a basic idea for a soft Stony fic as a a follow up to Day 5? 

* D4 - Avengers Compound - wrote up A Star-Spangled Celebration as a  crossover with SGR Week Day 4: Food &Traditions  The gang gets together for Steve’s birthday, coming in at 499 words.

* E1 - Scars - Wrote up You Don’t Have to Hide as a crossover with SGR Week Day 5: Touch  549 words of Steve and Tony getting more comfortable with each other physically. 

* E2 - Comics Nomad Steve  - SWC sketch of Nomad!Steve

Tony Stark Bingo - Round 6  (TSB_R6)  {Ends 28 Feb]

Got my card and am raring to go!  Carried over two squares from the last round, and have several ideas to potentially play with. 

* T3 - Pepper Potts/Rescue -  remix of sabrecmc’s  Indecent Proposal

* A2 - KINK: Alpha/Beta/Omega Society - next chapter of Flawed Hypothesis or an idea that @deehellcat sparked over on the Discord server - potential collab?

* R2 - IronWidow  -  next chapter of Lady Natasha's Consort and Lord Steve's Companion ?

* K2 - Secret Admirer - see BBB Y2 - Never the fall that kills you

* K3 - KINK: Orgasm Denial/Edging -  see BBB KINK: Edging   

* K5 - Protectiveness -  @lacrimula-falsa tossed out a great  underworld AU prompt a while ago that I tweaked:  Tony (The Engineer) provides the best weapons and gadgets in the business and Steve is a master forger (The Artist).  They both discover someone has put out a hit on the other, hiring The Soldier.  If anyone wants to collab on this - let me know!

————

On other creative fronts:  I have a Yeti in progress with Count Orlok and Myotismon in the works. I currently have two August slots available.  Am also gearing up for a classic monster/horror con in October and a  superhero con in March - so need to build up stock for both.  

if  you’re looking for one of a kind gifts (for a friend or something for yourself!)  you can plan ahead for  the next holiday season and check   out Stuffed With Character    over on Facebook for a full list of my designs (now over 80!).   They’re  mostly Marvel and monsters, but I have some Star Wars, Star Trek, DC   and Disney figures as well. Plus I love to take custom design  requests  for any fandom!

[explosionshark]

Thanks for recommending Gideon the Ninth! It was so good! Do you have a book rec tag I could check out? :)

honestly i should, huh? i’ve read more books than probably ever before this year and i’ve talked about ‘em intermittently, but not with a consistent tag. i’ll recommend some right now, though, with a healthy dose of recency bias!

sf/f

the priory of the orange tree by samantha shannon - a truly epic fantasy novel with one of the most beautiful, satisfying f/f romances i’ve ever read. the novel takes account nearly everything i hate about fantasy as a genre (overwhelmingly straight, white, and male centric, bland medieval European settings, tired tropes) and subverts them. incredible world-building, diverse fantasy cultures, really cool arthrurian legend influence. one of my favorite books i’ve ever read tbh.

gideon the ninth by tamsyn muir - which you’ve read, obviously, but for posterity’s sake i’m keeping it here! sci-fi + murder mystery + gothic horror. genuinely funny while still having a super strong emotional core and more than enough gnarly necromantic to satisfy the horror nerd in me. makes use of some of my favorite tropes in fiction, namely the slowburn childhood enemies to reluctant allies to friends to ??? progression between gideon and harrow. absolutely frothing at the mouth for a sequel.

the broken earth trilogy by nk jemisin - really the first book that helped me realize i don’t hate fantasy, i just hate the mainstream ‘medieval europe but with magic’ version of fantasy that dominates the genre. EXTREMELY cool worldbuilding. i’ve definitely described it as like, a GOOD version of what the mage-vs-templar conflict in dragon age could have been, with a storyline particularly reminiscent of “what if someone got Anders right?”

this is how you lose the time war by amal el-mohtar and max gladstone - i’m not usually big on epistolary novels, but this one really worked for me. spy vs spy but it’s gay and takes place between time traveling agents of two opposing sides of a war. the letter writing format really plays to el-mohtar’s strengths as a poet, the unfolding love story is weird and beautiful. it’s a really quick read, too, if you’re short on time or attention.

empress of forever  by max gladstone - i just finished this one this week! if you’re in the mood for a space opera, look no further. imagine if steve jobs was an asian lesbian and also like not a shitty person. this is where you start with vivian liao. you get the classic putting-the-band-together arc with beings from all across the universe, your romances and enemies-turned-friends and uneasy alliances all over the place. really satisfying character development and some extremely cool twists along the way. it’s just a fun good time.

the luminous dead by caitlin starling - this one rides the line of horror so it’s closest to that part of the list. it reminds me of the most inventive low budget horror/sci-fi films i’ve loved in the best way possible because it makes use of the barest narrative resources. it’s a book that takes place in one primary setting, featuring interactions between two characters that only meet each other face-to-face for the briefest period. the tension between the two characters is the most compelling part of the story, with competing and increasingly unreliable narratives and an eerie backdrop to ratchet things up even higher. the author described it as “queer trust kink” at one point which is, uh, super apt actually and totally my jam. the relationship at the center of the book is complicated to say the least, outright combative at points, but super compelling. plus there’s lost of gnarly sci-fi spelunking if you like stories about people wandering around in caves.

horror

the ballad of black tom by victor lavalle - we all agree that while lovecraft introduced/popularized some cool elements into horror and kind of defined what cosmic horror would come to mean, he was a racist sack of shit. which is why my favorite type of ‘lovecraftian horror’ is the type that openly challenges his abhorrent views. the ballad of black tom is a retelling of the horror at redhook that flips the narrative by centering the action around a black protagonist. 

lovecraft country by matt ruff - more of what i just described. again, lovecraftian themes centered around black protagonists. this one’s especially cool because it’s a series of interconnected short stories following related characters. it’s getting a tv adaptation i believe, but the book is definitely not to be missed

rolling in the deep / into the drowning deep by mira grant - mermaids are real and they’re the ultimate deep sea predators! that’s really the whole premise. if for some reason that’s not enough for you, let me add this: diverse cast, a romance between a bi woman who’s not afraid to use the word and an autistic lesbian, really cool speculative science tangents about mermaid biology and myth. 

the haunting of hill house by shirley jackson - it’s halloween month so i’m thinking about hill house again. one of the greatest american ghost stories ever written. especially worth the read if you follow it up w the 1964 film adaptation (the haunting) and then the 2018 netflix series.

the hunger by alma katsu - i’ve always been fascinated by the donner party even though we now know the popular narrative is largely falsehoods. still, this highly fictionalized version of events scratched an itch for me and ended up surprising me with its resistance from the most expected and toxic racist tropes associated with donner party myth.

wounds / north american lake monsters by nathan ballingrud - nathan ballingrud is my favorite horror writer of all time. one of my favorite writers period regardless of genre. in ballingrud’s work the horror is right in front of you. you can look directly at it, it’s right there. but what permeates it, what draws your attention instead, what makes it hurt is the brutally honest emotional core of everything surrounding the horror. the human tragedy that’s’ reflected by the more fantastic horror elements is the heart of his work. it’s always deeply, profoundly moving for me. both of these collections are technically short stories, but they’re in the horror section of the recs because delineations are totally arbitrary and made solely at my discretion. 

short stories

her body and other parties by carmen maria machado - tbh i almost put this in w horror but there’s enough weird fiction here for me to be willing to straddle the line. it was really refreshing to read horror that centered queer women’s perspectives. the stories in this collection are really diverse and super powerful. there’s an incredible weird fiction piece that’s like prompt-based law and order svu micro fiction (go with me here) that ends up going to some incredible places. there’s the husband stitch, a story that devastated me in ways i’m still unraveling. the final story reminded me of a more contemporary haunting of hill house in the best way possible. machado is a writer i’m really excited about.

vampires in the lemon grove by karen russell - my friend zach recommended this to me when we were swapping book recs earlier this year and i went wild for it! mostly weird fiction, but i’m not really interested in getting hung up on genres. i don’t know what to say about this really other than i really loved it and it got me excited about reading in a way i haven’t been in a while. 

the tenth of december by george saunders - i really like saunders’ work and i feel like the tenth of december is a great place to start reading him. quirky without being cloying, weird without being unrelatable.

misc

the seven husbands of evelyn hugo by taylor jenkins reid - there’s something really compelling to me about the glamour of old hollywood. this story is framed as a young journalist interviewing a famously reclusive former starlet at the end of her life. the story of how evelyn hugo goes from being the dirt-poor daughter of cuban immigrants to one of the biggest names in hollywood to an old woman facing the end of her life alone is by turns beautiful, inspiring, infuriating and desperately sad. by far the heart of the book is in evelyn finally coming out as bisexual, detailing her decades-long on/off relationship with celia st. james, another actress. evelyn’s life was turbulent, fraught with abuse and the kind of exploitation you can expect from the hollywood machine, but the story is compelling and engaging and i loved reading it.

smoke gets in your eyes by caitlin doughty - a memoir by caitlin doughty, the woman behind the popular ‘ask a mortician’ youtube series. it was a super insightful look into the american death industry and its many flaws as well as an interesting, often moving look at the human relationship with death through the eyes of someone touched by it early and deeply.

love and rockets by los bros hernandez (jaime and gilbert and mario) - this was a big alt comic in the 80s with some series within running on and off through the present. i’m not current, but this book was so important for me as a kid. in particular the locas series, which centered around two queer latina girls coming up in the punk scene in a fictional california town. the beginning starts of a little sci-fi-ish but over time becomes more concerned with slice-of-life personal dramas. 

[claraxbarton]

MCU Bucky Barnes

So here’s the thing.

I’m a costume designer by trade, and one thing that I actually really love about Captain America: The Winter Soldier (okay, among the things I love) is the costume design and the rhetorical value given to the clothes and, well, costumes in this movie. 

For example - when Sam and Steve have their heart to heart on the bridge that ends with Sam saying “but he doesn’t even know you” and Steve saying “he will” before going to steal his old uniform - the one Bucky last saw him in when he was Bucky. There are some other great costume points in this movie, actually a LOT of them (costumes, not wigs, don’t at me because I KNOW).

But one thing that has always stood out to me, and not in a good way, is the “I’m with you til the end of the line” flashback.

Now, here’s the thing, it’s not JUST about the clothes. We’re in MCU verse, so it’s MCU canon - obviously, the Steve and Bucky duo is drastically different in Marvel comics canon so - and Bucky starts this scene by saying his folks wanted to give Steve a ride to the cemetery.

Which is super cool and nice. So one, we know Bucky’s dad is still alive - and his mom, but two, we know they have a car.

So this is supposed to be when Steve is around 16? So it’s... 1936 (according to MCU wiki it totally is)

So cars.

Crazy popular ever since they started having closed bodies and all that. BUT, were they crazy popular in CITIES in 1936? Especially in the middle of the Great Depression?

There’s some evidence that actually no, that car ownership in a city like NYC was something like 1 car per every 43 people. Then again, looking at the NYC.gov 2015 Mobility Report we see that the population of NYC in 1936 is something like 7.2 million, and the number of registered vehicles in 764,000... or roughly one per every 9.4-ish persons. Which is a pretty drastically different number. This doesn't, of course, account for taxis or fleet cars being registered - so the number might seem inflated. I still think it’s probably something closer to 1 car per every 20 than every 43 but... I’m too lazy to dig that much deeper at the moment. Plus I'm sick, which is fueling this in the first place.

So, anyway you slice it, Bucky’s family was in 11%, 5% or 2.33% of New Yorkers who own cars in 1936. Which says something, I think, about Bucky Barnes that we don’t always - ever? - think of in fandom.

I’m not going to say that Bucky Barnes was loaded. Maybe his family owned a garage or a grocery store or a delivery service or a funeral home...?? or something. So, the vehicle could be occupational as opposed to private usage - but either way it’s a statement. Bucky’s family has money and/or Bucky’s family has steady employment.

I’ve been there. I’ve read the fics where Bucky works at the docks to put Steve through art school and get him his medicine. I love those fics. I love that head canon.

But I... don’t think it’s realistic in light of some evidence showing us that, actually, Bucky wasn’t doing too badly for himself.

Let’s now actually look at CLOTHING. Here’s the whole scene via youtube, if you want to follow along with what is about to get RIDICULOUS.

Actually, before I dive in, who is the costumer for this movie? And should I be like... reading into all this as much as I am?

Judianna Makovsky - fellow New Jersey..Ian?ite?no clue - 3 time Oscar nominee and designer of 5 MCU films and a lot of other big budget movies, including quite a few period pieces dealing with issues of race and class (The Legend of Bagger Vance, Seabiscuit, The Little Princess.. and also like Harry Potter and The Quick and the The Dead.) So, should I have some faith in Judianna Makovsky’s designs? I’m gonna go with yeah, yeah I should. 

So, back to the movie. The scene.

This is post funeral. We’re in 1936. As a general rule, the dress, colors and style of mourning wear was pretty much formalized in the early Victorian era. There was a great - read PHENOMENAL - exhibit at the MET a few years back on Mourning-wear and I’m still reeling from how lovely everything was - but the gist of it is this: you wore black when someone died. If you were a lady, and especially if you were a rich lady, you then went through a few different colors (dull black to SHINY black to purple/mauve and gray and white and then back to color within six months to one year). By the 1930s only the really rich were sticking to the actual rules of mourning - or like, really old people. And, of course, really old rich people. Really old rich WHITE people. Because it needs to be said: these are WHITE customs. I'm not saying people of other ethnicities didn’t follow them, but these are basically British Victorian practices that were assimilated into American culture.

I’m not going to go off on a huge sidebar about American fashion following in French dressmaking and British tailoring, but I need to say at least that much. Everyone who was anyone knew you got your dresses made in France or in the French style and you got your suits made in England - Savile Row in specific. I am NOT implying Bucky’s got himself an English suit, fyi. I just... have to be thorough.

BACK TO THE SCENE:

We’ve got our boy Steve. STEVE. Who just buried Sarah Rogers and what is he wearing...?

For starters, he’s wearing a windbreaker, check out the 1933 ad below, he’s the guy almost giving us the Fonz finger gesture, or maybe guy in the fedora on the end.

This thing isn’t falling apart at the seams, but it’s a very nondescript not really gray, not really blue - maybe was at one point. It also doesn’t FIT Steve. It also, in the ad above, would cost about $165.40 in today’s money.

My guess? It’s Bucky’s old windbreaker. Because it’s not cheap and because it’s just a bit too big on Steve. 

He’s also wearing a shirt that is maybe tan? And a brown tie and maybe - MAYBE black trousers. And if those trousers are black, it’s the only black thing he’s wearing. Not even a black tie, or a black arm band (which I’m pretty sure - but also pretty aggressively atheist so I don’t know - the Catholic Church would have provided for chief mourners and pall bearers right?). We also have our depressing as all shit Depression surroundings to clue us in: Steve Rogers ain’t loaded. Steve Rogers is poor as dirt. Side note: boys. Hiding a key under the ONE FUCKING BRICK on a walkway is not like... a smart idea???

So we can guess a few things here, we can guess that Steve and Sarah were really struggling - this checks out with the rest of MCU canon (wearing newspapers stuffed in his shoes, even when he had nothing he had Bucky, etc.) - and that all money probably went towards Steve’s numerous ailments, food and then the TB medication or treatment, as it was, that was available to Sarah.

We can maybe guess that Steve and Sarah weren’t very religious -but I don’t feel qualified to impart anything except my own agenda here so I’m not taking that stance. But like, real talk, not even an arm band?? 

But, well, let’s move on to the point of this whole long ass thing anyway?

--

Then we go to Mr. Barnes, looking dapper AF. Also, hey, check out this ad from 1933 featuring... pretty much exactly what Bucky is wearing down to the god-damn two-tone shoes:

If you’re curious, yeah $24.98 in 1936 is $475.44. I'm not suggesting Bucky Barnes went out and bought a brand new suit for Steve’s mother’s funeral - for one thing, this ad is from 1933. BUT, that suit fits Bucky. Quite well, and it’s in good shape. He’s also sporting that super stylish mid-late 30s into 40s deeply angled collar shirt - as is our dude up in the ad - and so we know these clothes are at least new-ish. We also can see that the suit is definitely of the mid-30s moving into the boxy silhouette of the later 30s and early 40s and NOT the look of the 20s and early 30s, which has an almost bell-bottom fullness to the legs instead of our straight-leg here (though we can debate nuance if you want to hit up my DMs.)

I should note, Bucky’s shirt is not bright and pristine white - it’s kind of grayish? And I can’t tell if that’s supposed to be an old-timey sepia thing or an indication that Bucky can’t afford to... bleach a white shirt? So that’s an odd choice for sure because we’re still in an age when a crisp, white collar shirt means something (Hey, if you want to hear me go on about the democratization of men’s fashion via shirt collars and 19th century Victorian suits, let me know because I am READY).

All this is to say: I don’t think Bucky Barnes is a poor dock worker. I think Bucky Barnes of MCU canon. Okay, so the MCU wiki on Bucky/The Winter Soldier is an actual mess (because it tells us that Sarah died in 1936 and that’s FINE but I’m not going back to change my math because I’m SICK so just... I went back and changed it. She died in 1936. Fine. The damn wiki also says that “a year later, during their art class, Barnes and Rogers found out that the United States of America had joined World War II. Which, like, I’m sick, but there are a few years between 1936 and December 8 1941... just... I’m no rocket doctor but...

ANYWAY. Bucky is a three time YMCA welterweight boxing champion by this “year later”/ 1941-1942. He and Steve are also in an ART CLASS together. Bucky also trained Steve in boxing at Goldie’s gym before the two of them went to enlist - Steve rejected and Bucky, again quoting MCU wiki, “drafted” (which I'm gonna take to mean he didn’t try to enlist when Steve got rejected, they went home and Bucky got called up later but... hey, who knows?!).

So, I can’t easily find the prices of gym memberships in NYC in the 1930s right now because I don’t feel like wading through all of the articles complaining about Equinox pricing in 2019. But I do know that part of Roosevelt’s WPA (Works Progress Administration) building projects included building more public gyms - as well as libraries, auditoriums, pools, parks etc. Check out your local public buildings - if they are WPA projects they will have a cool plaque like my local NJ library does! All that is to say, there were free or very cheap PUBLIC options where Bucky could have trained Steve.

Bucky trained Steve in a private gym. Do I like to think that this is the same gym Steve and America’s ass are working out in in The Avengers? Yes, Yes I do. Do I like to think that Steve likes to box because it reminds him of Bucky? Yes, yes I do.

But moving on: it’s another sign of wealth.

So is this “art class.” Whether we are in 1937 or 1941 - we’re still in the Depression. Steve still has all of his health issues and presumably accompanying “medication” (wanna talk 1930s medicine? Again, slide into my DMs or shoot me an ask). So Steve either has a side job making enough to cover all of that, rent? and enrollment in an art class.

OR maybe Steve is teaching the art class and Bucky is his model for life drawing instruction (yeah, it’s a fic bunny I’m sharing with the world).

OR maybe... Bucky is paying the rent and other things or Steve is living with Bucky and can afford the class and meds... somehow or...

OR I'm not saying that Steve is Bucky’s kept man because Steve Rogers would punch anyone who dared to say such a thing.

All I’m saying is, Bucky Barnes was not a poor dude. Bucky Barnes... had some money.

And also I’m about to be late for my doctor’s appointment so I gotta run.

At me with your thoughts!

[weaverlings]

Every Episode of WTNV with Carlos Mentioned

No, I did not keep track of how long I spent on this. Anyway.

Total series count: 89 episodes

In the main podcast, anyway. The list includes at least partial context; however I wasn't counting the number of times Carlos was mentioned per episode, just if he was mentioned at all. So if he came up more than once I didn't necessarily record each time. Still, there are definitely spoilers.

I can't like… guarantee that I didn't miss something, unfortunately. However, I used both "Carlos" and "scientist" all the time, and I additionally used "boyfriend" from 26 onward and "husband" after 100. So it should be pretty close, at least. 

I might go through and do live shows later. However, the answer for them is (almost) always yes, as most of them at least have a segment that Dylan Marron performs at some shows, so it'd be more a matter of checking for mentions of Carlos outside of that.

The reason I did this was to see if I was at all correct in my sense that Carlos has been mentioned less over time. My conclusion: well… sort of?

There actually was less of him than I thought in both year 1 and year 2 (year 1 in particular). However, years 3 and 4 had a LOT of him, and it has gone down from there through the end of year 7, when Carlos was only mentioned in 7 episodes total, with very few casual mentions by Cecil (vs when he had a particular role in what was going on). 

So the problem (or at least, I consider it one) hasn't been going on for as long as I thought in the grand scheme of the series. I now believe that a significant part of the issue is just… Well, it has at this point been almost three years since that decline. Plus listening live makes everything feel drawn out, so there's a lot of perceived time in between individual mentions. 

That being said, I think the actual conclusion is: it's maybe not as I thought, but I also wasn't completely imagining it, especially not looking at very recent events. We don't know what this year will hold, but year 7, as mentioned above, had the least of Carlos in it so far. There are also some significant gaps - Cecil mentions Carlos in episode 91, and after that the next time he comes up in year 5 is in 100 (!!!!)

He is mentioned in a solid majority of the series, but it's pretty front-loaded at this point. Also he has a few appearances in the first novel, and he's a central character in It Devours!

Finally, thanks so much @cecilspeaks because this wouldn't have been possible to do at all otherwise.

The complete list is as follows:

Year 1

episode 1: yes (well of course) 

episode 2: no

episode 3: yes (the Telly thing)

episode 4: yes (dissenting at the PTA meeting)

episode 5: yes (Cecil tried to ask him about the moon but couldn't find him)

episode 6: no

episode 7: no

episode 8: yes (Carlos wants to talk about lights in Radon Canyon, not dinner or weekend plans)

episode 9: yes (but in the context of Telly wandering the desert)

episode 10: no

episode 11: yes (Cecil asked about tectonic activity - Carlos is "distracted yet beautiful")

episode 12: no

episode 13: no 

episode 14: no

episode 15: no

episode 16: yes (basically the central plot of the episode)

episode 17: no

episode 18: no

episode 19 A+B: no for both

episode 20: no

episode 21: no

episode 22: no

episode 23: no

episode 24: no

episode 25: yes (absolutely)

Total year count: 9

Year 2

episode 26: no

episode 27: yes  

episode 28: no

episode 29: yes (Carlos has opinions on subway riders' DNA)

episode 30: yes (checking out the house that doesn't exist)

episode 31: yes (Carlos "promised a certain person dinner")

episode 32: yes (Carlos gave Cecil the watch for their 1-month anniversary)

episode 33: no

episode 34: no

episode 35: yes (Carlos is being industrious!)

episode 36: no

episode 37: arguably (Cecil mentions finding "someone that might make [him] feel better about what has happened today" which probably means Carlos, but he's not mentioned directly)

episode 38: yes (Carlos has scientific opinions about orange grove growth + Cecil almost texts that he loves him but just knocks the imposter out instead)

episode 39: no (but fun fact: Dylan Marron originally did the pre-episode announcements for this one. I don't have the file anymore sadly.)

episode 40: yes (Lauren brings him up though)

episode 41: no

episode 42: no

episode 43: yes (Carlos is looking into the house that doesn't exist again)

episode 44: no

episode 45: no

episode 46: yes (he's on the phone w/ Cecil about the oak doors)

episode 47: yes (but it's Lauren and Kevin talking about how they haven't found him)

episode 48: yes (Cecil doesn't know where he is)

episode 49 A+B: yes (and I don't wanna talk about it :( )

Total count: 14 (ish, because 37 is subject to debate and 47 is different as noted. So maybe 12.)

Year 3

episode 50: yes (people have been asking Cecil about Carlos)

episode 51: yes (he spends most of it on the phone with Cecil)

episode 52: yes (Cecil's been getting calls and snapchats)

episode 53: no (but Steve mentions Cecil had "softened in the right places" over the past year)

episode 54: yes ("A Carnival Comes to Town." that's it.)

episode 55: yes ("The University of What It Is." again. that's it!)

episode 56: yes (Cecil's been isolated w/out Carlos, Cecil talks to Diane about Carlos, and then Cecil has a dream about being w/ Carlos again and sleeps well…)

episode 57: yes (Cecil wonders if Carlos knew the list, and then discusses the "current context" of their relationship - a matter of space)

episode 58: yes (Carlos doesn't want Cecil to say he's trapped in the other world + Cecil misses him)

episode 59: yes (Carlos is on the phone w/ Cecil)

episode 60: yes (Cecil considering whether or not he can visit Carlos)

episode 61: yes (Cecil mentions Carlos to Earl and also wonders if science can help him process the events of 59)

episode 62: no

episode 63: no

episode 64: yes (this episode has the watercolor painting in it)

episode 65: yes (Carlos leaves a voicemail)

episode 66: yes (considering the logistics of the Dog Park)

episode 67: no

episode 68: yes (Cecil talks about visiting Carlos)

episode 69: yes (Cecil announces his "last" broadcast to move to be w/ Carlos)

episode 70: A; yes (but again, context - it's got Carlos still in the otherworld). B; yes, Cecil describes Carlos' return

Total count: 17 

Year 4

episode 71: yes (Carlos "participates" in the heist and is safe at home later)

episode 72: yes (Carlos can apparently sleep through anything!)

episode 73: yes (Carlos apparently tells Cecil not to worry about even catastrophic or paradoxical mistakes)

episode 74: yes (certain local radio hosts and scientists may have been using the Dog Park to go back and forth between Night Vale and a desert otherworld)

episode 75: yes (matching lycra shorts)

episode 76: yes (Carlos makes delicious fruit salad! also he's working on a solution to the flamingo problem)

episode 77: no

episode 78: yes (Carlos likes the gory parade + Earl is invited to dinner w/ Cecil and Carlos)

episode 79: no

episode 80: yes (Cecil tells his boyfriend he wants a beret)

episode 81: yes (Cecil spent time w/ Carlos between reeducation sessions)

episode 82: yes (sort of. Cecil mentions knowing what it's like in a long-term relationship, which is cute, and it's obvious who it's about, so I'm counting it)

episode 83: yes (Carlos does the shopping because Cecil has trouble with auctions)

episode 84: yes ("Hey there, Lonely Boy…")

episode 85: no

episode 86: no

episode 87: yes (Cecil considers the possibility of a tropical vacation w/ Carlos)

episode 88: yes (phone conversation, bunny nickname)

episode 89: yes (what Carlos is up to w/ the stranger situation)

episode 90: yes (Carlos is in the crowd against the dog/strangers)

Total count: 16

Year 5

episode 91: yes (Cecil reaches out to Carlos about the train, but he doesn't know :( )

episode 92: no

episode 93: no

episode 94: no

episode 95: no

episode 96: no

episode 97: no

episode 98: no

episode 99: no

episode 100: YES

episode 101: no

episode 102: yes (Carlos who Cecil is closest to other than Josie)

episode 103: yes (they're excited about going to the beach w/ family + they visited Josie together)

episode 104: yes (Cecil and Carlos go together to pay respects to Josie)

episode 105: yes (Carlos discusses dinner + TV viewing plans and has some concerns about the Smithwick house)

episode 106: no

episode 107: yes (Carlos arranges a task force regarding sounds heard under the earth)

episode 108: yes (tied into broken-reality weirdness)

episode 109: no

episode 110: yes (Steve brings him up - asked Carlos about space and Carlos skips away because he's so excited about science)

Total count: 9

Year 6

episode 111: yes (Carlos worries about having grown too used to Night Vale + the material testing in ep1 was an excuse to talk to Cecil)

episode 112: no

episode 113: yes (everything makes Cecil think of Carlos. Also he's out of town at a science convention)

episode 114: no

episode 115: yes (Cecil isn't concerned about robberies at labs or radio stations, but is concerned about librarian attacks on his family)

episode 116: yes (Strip uno… also "just the most vicious outfits")

episode 117: no

episode 118: yes (Cecil knows science… heck yes of course!!)

episode 119: yes (Carlos' hair is used to calibrate equipment)

episode 120: no

episode 121: no

episode 122: no

episode 123: no

episode 124: yes (A Door Ajar pt 1)

episode 125: yes (A Door Ajar pt 2)

episode 126:  yes (A Door Ajar pt 3)

episode 127: yes (Carlos and Cecil plan to hold a blood matter viewing party)

episode 128: yes (the viewing party starts + Cecil and Carlos have a houseguest)

episode 129: yes (everyone, including Carlos, is surprised by the depth of the blood matter)

episode 130: no

Total count: 12

Year 7

episode 131: yes (Carlos texts Cecil about a matter of scientific accuracy)

episode 132: no

episode 133: yes (Carlos has a concern about the time situation, and also there's the Telly ending)

episode 134: yes (Cecil and Carlos attend a high school football game together + with the rest of their family)

episode 135: no

episode 136: no

episode 137: no

episode 138: no

episode 139: no

episode 140: no

episode 141: no

episode 142: no

episode 143: yes (Cecil tells Carlos he's coming home but, y'know, no one can hear)

episode 144: no

episode 145: no

episode 146: no

episode 147: yes (Carlos has been studying the moon and… there's other stuff that happens)

episode 148: no

episode 149: yes (once again a lot of stuff but Cecil remembers by the end. It's "already forgotten" apparently)

episode 150: yes (Cecil discusses their anniversary; also Carlos discovers his clock working)

Total count: 7

Year 8 (ongoing)

episode 151: no

episode 152: no

episode 153: yes (Carlos' experiments get messy so he ends up working at Steve and Abby's place)

episode 154: yes (Carlos is continuing to run experiments at Steve and Abby's and is taken in for questioning when Steve is arrested)

episode 155: yes (Carlos is really the one who figures everything out tbh)

episode 156: yes (Cecil is anxious about death/separation from Carlos, and then gets excited when he thinks there's a way for them to be together forever)

episode 157: yes (Carlos has some concerns about the proposed solution and wants to talk it out w/ Cecil)

Total count (so far): 5