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starilianreads · 1 month

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Who you think you're v/s

who you really are!

Hello everyone!! As I said, I'm back with my tarot reading! And I'll keep uploading pacs every Saturday and Sundays, so keep in tune with me!!

You already know what the topic is so let's get straight into it!🥠☺️

🔴Disclaimer

English is not my first language so sorry for any grammatical mistakes

Take what resonates and leave what doesn't not everything is meant for you

It is solely based on my intuition:))

Pictures are generated from AI

Let's get started!!

Pile 1-> pile 2

Pile 3->pile 4

Pile 1

Hii pile 1! Here's your reading! First let's see who you think you're.

The hermit, temperance, the emperor, pow,pop,4os

Okay, you think yourself as you're the main character of the story, which is definitely a good thing, I don't sense anything like you downplay yourself or something, I just can sense that you think you're very humble, and like a lifelong student, but you have control of your life in your own hands. You don't want anyone else to control you. You think you're childish, and like live the life to the fullest, full of passion, motivation and enthusiasm. It's likely that you're maybe just about to start your adult life now. Like you're young adult maybe. But one thing for sure, you think that you're an introverted person and you don't want just anyone to come into your life unnecessarily. You know yourself so well pile no.1! Proud of you! Lol! I think it's what you feel for yourself! You think of your journey in a very proud way, no matter whatever you've gone through, you're always like "see how far I've come!" I'm getting star card energy. You're possibly a fire sign, or have Jupiter, sun influence in your chart a lot! Lol. You also love to self-care, like you do love yourself, and that's a good thing! I'm also getting like you want major independence, you don't want to depend on anyone, emotionally, mentally, physically, materially. You have to independent!! That's why, maybe you take care of yourself a lot, and like always love yourself as the way you wish others would do as well. Maybe more then that, you take rest whenever you need, and work for your own happiness. Is what you think of yourself you are.✨

Now let's see who you really are

Qoc,the sun,9op,10ow,6op,aop

Yk your worth pile 1, you actually know yourself quite well! Now I proud of you as well! You're actually the life of the party! Who live their life to the fullest, not just for show, but for themselves. Idk I'm getting Taylor swifts energy somehow, especially I'm getting a channeled song for you of her, I'll pin down after this reading. You help others for your happiness, you wear good clothes, that make "you" feel good, you style yourself to make "yourself" feel good. And you want nothing else. And no you're not self-obsessed you're just in love with yourself! You are just so optimistic about yourself and your life, that you really feel like a main character to me!! I'm sensing hyper independence. Yes, you actually want to independent in every fuckin way! You're actually childish, but not naive, you know when to act mature and when to be silly.. and most importantly yk your worth! That's what matters the most! Ig universe helps you a lot as well, and I'm feeling that you're really hard-working as well, that you definitely reap what you've sown, equally. And it's like all things are balanced and yk how to balance things in your life as well! You're whole package pile 1!! I'm exactly sensing fire and somewhat air energies, you're a one maybe. You're very emotionally mature that's what I have to say in last! Like you're actually mature for your age honestly.

Thank you so much pile 1 for being here!! I appreciate your efforts and time here! Thanks a lot! Please lemme know if you enjoyed this reading and any other topic if you have. Subscribe to my PATREON and DM me for paid readings:)💕

Pile 2

Hii pile 2! Welcome to your reading so let's see first who you think you're.

Koc,the star, the hanged man, 7ow, 5os,6ow

Okay, so pile 2, I think that you think of yourself as a misunderstood person, like people misunderstood you a lot, and you have to defend yourself every time, and there are less or no people by your side to defend you. You're either a water sign,(cancer,Scorpio,pisces) or a Libra. Specifically I'm getting pisces energy. You are interested in astrology or astronomy.. and you think you're very spritual and emotionally mature. You also think of yourself as a deep individual and you're able to make deep connections with people as per your thinking. You have very different notions of success and fame, like you think very differently and like outside the box, I'm getting so much cosmic energy from you? Idk why. Your mind is more in the things you believe rather then thinking about your material gains and stuff, it's like someone is probably a daydreamer, and like want to be famous for more of what they think, and what they do, instead of the money they gain, or like a billionaire, I mean, rather then being famous for being a billionaire you will be much happy being famous as a life coach or spritual guru more. You're probably philosophical in nature, is what you think. You want to keep everyone together, you like unity like Libras.

Now let's see who you really are

Aos,the magician, the sun, 4os,kos,5ow

Yeah pile 2, you think of yourself right, here we have 2 situations either you don't show yourself much, like you're always kind of behind the scenes, and like don't trust much, and don't show who you really are, which causes misunderstanding or you are just very straight to the point,logical and honest af, which causes you to be in controversies. Yeah you deal with controversies. But when I was shuffling I was getting earth angel vibes, and you're an earth angel with the magician in the conjunction with the sun, and ace of swords. It's like you're honest nature is the biggest blessing in disguise? And like that's what leads people in the right direction, it's possible that you're kind of inexperienced in terms of worldly things, and so you're pure and genuine, and you maybe don't know how to present things, and that's why people kind of misunderstand you, but they know deep down, that what you've said, was right, and you're not wrong, but their ego kind of disagree with it, because of that they disagree with you, it's just their own projections. Yeah you're an earth angel, and really like guide people, and because of the misunderstandings there are some issues build up inside, and that's why now you have either hard time trusting people, or like only show things which are kind of acceptable. Idk it's just I'm channeling that the magical side is still hidden from other's and you only know that side of yours. Okay I've to stop now, because I'm channeling so much, but it's like it's getting out of the topic soo😅 yeah!

Thank you so much pile 2 for being here!! I appreciate your efforts and time here! Thanks a lot! Please lemme know if you enjoyed this reading and any other topic if you have. Subscribe to my PATREON and DM me for paid readings:)💕

Pile 3

Hii pile 3! And welcome to your reading! Let's see who you think you're first.

The star, the death, knight of wands, 3op,2oc,10op

I think you should check out pile 2 as well, the energies are so similar. Yeah, it's so similar? Should I do it again? Wait lemme interpret it. Hmmmmm... So pile 3, you are kind of transformative person, yk that you'll change, and you do change. You think that you're someone not afraid of change anymore and see change as the way and opportunity to grow and nourish yourself. I'm getting Scorpio/Pluto vibes here. You think that you're very charming and get love offers easily. It's like you are very invested in material things, but you take everything so seriously. Like career, relationships, these are some important parts of our life, and our needs and you take this so seriously? Idk I'm getting very serious vibes here. You can able to balance things out as well real quick, like you can equally give time to your family and loved ones, and then equal time to your career as well. That's what you think of yourself. Great pile 3. But I'm getting Jupiter in Scorpio vibes. You're either interested in occult science, or most of the time you keep your information private. You're straightforward, but want to keep everyone together. You should definitely check pile 2 as well like I'm strongly getting their vibes but more in a scorpionic or more forced way, idk how to interpret it, but just do check it out please.

Now let's see who you really are

3ow, the moon, knight of pentacles, 3os,8os,7os

You're unable to see yourself clearly pile 3😅 idk why, but this is the 1st pile who's like stuck in its own delusion, not that one with the change. But it's like you have so many insecurities from past hurt, and you're not properly healed from it, and there's something about is which is not right yk. You maybe project your insecurities on others, or like a Little naive in day to day basis, you might self sabotage a yourself, but you have a strong intuition and patience about things , you're able to surrender things to God, which is the most beautiful thing about you. You're kind of visionary and know when to do what. But the thing is, you're having a hard time trusting your intuition. And you're doing stuff out of that pain, I'm not getting anything else instead. I'm just channeling this energy of being stuck at something. You definitely need some self-work/love and care. You do have a "need" to do inner work. Then things will be more better. And because of this your true self in unable to come out, and like I feel like in a cage of some sort while doing your reading, I have a hard time expressing myself. Major advice, work on yourself.

Thank you so much pile 3 for being here!! I appreciate your efforts and time here! Thanks a lot! Please lemme know if you enjoyed this reading and any other topic if you have. Subscribe to my PATREON and DM me for paid readings:)💕

Pile 4

Hii pile 4! Welcome to your reading! Let's see who you think you're.

2os, the high priestess, 9ow,AOC, 10oc, 10ow,10op,the hermit.

Okay, this pile already know to some extent that who they're, and in this time of life, you are completed a major cycle of your life! With the 10 being 3 times here!! Or 10 is something significant for you! This pile has done the necessary inner work (it does not mean you don't have to do now, it's an endless journey, but the thing is, you're not in a immature state now) okay, you think you're someone introverted, knowledgeable, spritual, awakened,but kind of indecisive, individual. Ig Idk why I'm getting that you downplay yourself with the 2os, even you already know your potiential. Okay so maybe you downplay yourself in front of others? I'm getting that 48 laws of power, where they say in one of their quote that don't show your happiness and power in front of others, like something like that? I'm getting dark feminine vibes from you.so maybe that's what you think of yourself. 1,2,and 9 number is also significant for you in some way. You're currently working on yourself as well. Idk I'm just channeling some images, like coffee, books, emo aesthetic, cat eyeliner and so on.. with the 10,10,10 being here, I'm channeling some kind of inspirational story from you, there's something about your life, that you think is inspiring from other's around you, it's maybe a success story of yours you made, because of the passion and motivation you have inside.

Let's see who you really are

The emperor, Qow,Qop, 10ow,6os,5os

While shuffling, I was getting like influencer vibes from you, and so you might be working on a field where you can influence others, with the skills or talents you have, and see we have 2 queens! With the emperor! You're definitely working on a field, I'm getting entertainment industry, but it can be literally anything, it can be a business as well, with the Qop and the emperor, but one thing for sure, whatever you're doing, you'll gonna do it so well! Okay, now you're someone,who Is so charming, elegant, bubbly, very giving, and abundant individual! Idk I'm feeling like your spritual team is so proud of you! And you definitely have a success story of yours, that do inspire others! Because I'm feeling inspired and inspirational with your energy, it's like something significant happened in your past, but instead of seeing yourself as a victim of it, you've take your responsibility and moved one, and then worked on yourself healed yourself, and finally, you are here where you're currently! And like for eg, if someone challenged you, you shown them your power! And who you are! You're literally someone not to be messed up. You're empowering!! Pile 4!!

Yeah this was it! Here's the reading! Lemme know if you liked it, and suggest me some more topics if you want to! Thank you so much for being here🦋✨

#tarot card reading #tarot reading #tarot deck #tarot #tarot cards #tarot pac #tarotcommunity #pick a pile #pick a picture #pick a card #pick one #pac #tarotblr #tarot blog #tarot beginner #Spotify

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heartfullofleeches · 6 months

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Sooo uh is it too early to ask for nsfw hcs of carnis?

(I think enough time has passed... Mainly because I've finally got enough written)

Carnis - Yan Lab Experiment NSFW Hcs

• As mentioned in previous posts, Carnis has yet to experience a lot in the human world - sexual urges being yet another. As their bond with Reader grows that starts to change. Their body feels.. strange when their caretaker does certain things. Calls them cute pet names, strokes their ears or face - even just a smile gets their stomach twisted into knots and tension between their legs. It feels good to touch that area, but so wrong to them at the same time. They've always been told their body is just a tool for others - they shouldn't get to feel this way, especially when all they can think about is Reader's hands in place of theirs. It's dirty - wrong, but it feels so good.

They start to wonder if Reader has these same desire. The thought of helping them through it makes them happy.

• Carnis priorities your satisfaction over all, and more importantly theirs. They feel as though they aren't worth the effort and sees your pleasure as their own. With how inexperienced they are, you'll have to teach them a thing or two, but Carnis is willing to do whatever they can to make you happy. Their preferred method is laying back in bed and allowing you to ride their tongue/cock to your heart's content. They like if you use their mouth more since they wouldn't be able to last long inside you and feels guilty if they finish before you.

• Huge oral fixation + very touchy/clingy, but afraid to do both. Wants to touch and lick all over you, but restrains themselves unless given the command. Could spend hours with their head between your legs and still want for longer. If you give them permission to touch you, Carnis' hands will not leave your body. Gropes at your chest, thighs, and whatever you'll allow. Develops a habit of doing this in their sleep which they'll be none the wiser to unless mentioned. You'll know when they're about to cum when they lock fingers with yours or push through their anxiousness to kiss you without asking first.

This fixation works in reverse as well. Despite their years of testing, Carnis' body is very sensitive to certain touches. Kissing on their neck, chest or thighs makes them putty in your hands. Their nipples are especially tender and gripping their horns while they're going down on you will make them see stars. Liked being bitten whether it's enough to draw blood or just a little love bite. Avoids looking in mirrors if you leave hickies because the sight alone gets them aroused.

• Becomes increasingly vocal as they get more comfortable in bed. At first it's tiny whimpers and pants for more, but as they get used to things and you they can't keep their mouth shut. Begs to be touched more, for you to never leave them. Declares their love for you until their voice is raw. If your walls are thin might be best to invest in some sound proofing if you don't want noise complaints from neighbors.

• Sucker for praise and affection. Just wants to be your good boy/pet and to know you really mean it when you say it. Head pats, cutesy pet names, maybe a pretty collar or outfit if you're feeling generous. Carnis would wear anything you threw at them if you said they looked absolutely adorable in it.

• Another way Carnis gets over their aversion to self pleasure is by cumming in the meals they make for you. Long as it can benefit you, Carnis push through most things even the self hatred and guilt of watching you undress or sniffing your clothes and touching themselves because of it. If you mention the food being good, it'll clear them of all negative thoughts towards masturbating and lead to more dishes made with the same special ingredient. Cums on your pillows or clothes as a way to mark you as theirs, but only when they're about to wash them afterwards.

• If you have a dildo/fleshlight they will throw it out unless you use it on them. They're the only toy you need.

• Always looking for new things to try online. Drags you over to the computer to get your approval before buying a new collar or to show you a new position they'd like to try. Missionary is their favorite because they like seeing your face, but they're always open to try other things for you.

• Cuddling/Aftercare is a must. Carnis enjoys a nice bath and snuggling into bed with you, but just laying in your arms straight after is fine with them too. Run your fingers through their hair or just speak softly to them and they'll be out like a light. Thanks you for staying with them and allowing them to love you every minute before they fall asleep. Hugs you tighter if you so much as breath differently and will not let go until they wake up.

#yandere #yandere x reader #yandere imagines #yandere scenarios #yandere headcanons #yandere x you #yandere oc #yandere insert #yandere blurb #Carnis my oc #yandere teratophilia #yandere smut #tw yandere #yandere hybrid

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ao3commentoftheday · 4 months

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on the interpretation of comments

this post is also available on Dreamwidth

When a comment hits your inbox, it arrives without knowing your current frame of mind or stress level. It doesn't know whether you're having a crisis of confidence or the best day ever. The comment doesn't know your history, your insecurities, your preferences, or your personal stances on a wide range of issues.

More importantly: neither does the person who left that comment.

What prompts someone to leave a comment on a fanwork? Most of the time, it's some combination of

enjoyment of the work

anticipation of what might come next

happiness that someone else has a similar interpretation to what they themselves are looking for

camaraderie related to the canon, the fanon, the trope etc.

liking the creator, themselves, and wanting to make that creator happy

While there are certainly people out there who leave hateful or harassing comments, the overwhelming majority of commenters are trying their best to share joy and make someone's day a little better.

So why is it so easy to take a comment that was written in an attempt to make someone happy and instead be annoyed, frustrated, hurt, or otherwise upset?

As I said at the top, the commenter has no way of knowing what kind of day you're having or how you feel about the work they left their comment on. They don't know whether you feel guilt or pressure to post the next chapter. They don't know whether you're desperate to talk to someone about your characters and the story. If you do feel those things, though, it can be far too easy to read more into a comment than is actually there. A neutral statement becomes a demand. A question becomes a harsh critique. One wrong word can take a comment from a compliment to an insult.

In those moments when you start to feel those things, I encourage you to pause and take a breath. Remember that most people who comment on fanworks are not trying to upset you. Look to see if there might be a different way to interpret what they've said. Perhaps the phrasing is awkward or the word choice is odd. Not everyone who leaves comments feels comfortable writing. Not everyone speaks the same language you do to the same level of proficiency.

Look at your interpretation and see if you're actually projecting your insecurity. Is your anger at the comment actually a defense mechanism because something in the comment pushed an emotional button for you? Do you have guilt related to how slowly you're writing? Worry about how your ending will be received? Anxiety around receiving hate for the ship or the character that you're writing about? Fear that your writing isn't any good?

Maybe it's not your own insecurity at all. Perhaps you've just seen other writers who are upset at comments and taken their interpretation on as your own. Negativity is easy to pass on to those around you, and if you have a whole group of people saying, "This is obviously rude!" then you'll have blinders on to any other possible meaning.

It can be difficult to look at a comment that you interpret as mean and try to find a way to read it positively, and I don't blame anyone who doesn't want to put in that effort. I've just found that if I put myself in the other person's shoes and remember that most people are actually trying to be nice instead of mean, I can often find a way of reading something "rude" and realize that it's really not that bad at all.

#thinky thoughts

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samooooo1 · 1 month

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(Credit to the artist(NhanHoang) for this https://www.artpal.com/lordnx1997)

Zuko with a s/o, who learned lightningbending directly from a dragon

_____________________

•He probably be suprised and shocked at first, even more so when he learns that you didnt learn fire bending but lightning bending itself, he be like "HOW?!" Since he could only redirect lightning but bend? Thats a whole new level of mastery for him.

•He be quite amazed and it would bring him great comfort to him, knowing his darling can protect themselves even when he isnt there, it eases his mind and he be quite happy about it.

•Boast, thats one thing he will actually do, when having a council meeting as the firelord Zuko, he will boast to his offical how cool and powerful you are.

•He probably ask you if you wanted to spare with him, he is very curious since he himself was taught a bit by dragons, the time when had to teach Aang firebending.

•If you ever manage to defeat him, he be a blushing mess, a bonus if ya are a dominant women 😏, it be pretty funny I could say.

•He would directly get you to meet his Uncle Iroh, as lets be honest since the banishment of Zuko, Iroh was a better father to Zuko then Ozai ever could have been.

•His Uncle would have been also suprised but in a good way, he would tell the story of how he himself has meet the sun fighter.

•They wanted a demonstartion, they truly wanted to see what a dragon could teach in terms of firebending. When they saw you lightningbending, they were even more so shocked, as your lightning wasnt the typical purplish blue, but.. red?...It looked so majestic infact that Zuko made a potray of you with a dragon with red lightning.

•Its safe to say, he would love the red lightning of yours, he may ask for some advice at times in the form of bending tipps but most importantly, the red lightning makes a great show and he would find it fascinating, maybe it would even start a long royal family tradition, one who is firebending should one learn the red lightning and the other the blue version of it, so that on every marriage the two lovers unite in fierce lightning dance, giving the witnesses a show and a true testimony to their love.

_____________________

New One shot over, hope ya enjoyed it, God bless :D Bye byeee

#atla x reader #x reader #x female reader #anime #avatar the last airbender #zuko #zuko x reader

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lvlyghost · 8 months

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I LOVE YOUR WRITINGS SO MUCH 😩❤️😍 the way you characterize ghost is so good I can't 😭❤️ I wanted to ask if you could maybe write something for me since your writing style is sooo good frfr

How about ghost and reader have an argument that was started by ghost and he goes a bit too far breaking the reader and making them cry and be just a shell of themselves how would he feel when he sees the readers state and how would he fix it with a happy end please

Broken Wings

Pairings: Simon "Ghost" Riley x F!Reader

Summary: After a night out, things seem to take a turn in your relationship with Ghost.

Word Count: 2.1k

Tw: angst, hurt/comfort, self doubt, jealousy, probably ooc!simon, curse words. lots of grammar mistakes, poorly edited you know the drill🐝

A/N: i loved this request sooo much, though i did have a lot of trouble when writing it since i wasn't feeling too inspired. also had two different stories but ended up deciding to post this one i might post the other one idk, hope you like this anon! I did try my best🫶🏻🤍🩷✨corrections are appreciated; remember english isn't my native language 🐸

Masterlist✨

"I like you." You said with big bright eyes.

"But no one can know about this. Just you and I. That's enough." He answered, hand tracing the side of your face.

You blink rapidly. You have always been daydreamer. It caused you tons of problems although you tried to do your best when you were out on missions. Ghost is walking ahead of you, boots sinking in the sand beneath your feet. The waves crashing on the shore is something you like listening to and seeing too but under different circumstances. Both of your gear clink with every step you take, it's the only sound as well as the sea that swallows the tense silence that falls between the two.

Things have been rather... strange since two days ago and you've tried to talk to him about it. It wasn't weird for Ghost to push you back every now and then, he was a complicated person and you couldn't be more different from one another.

You were the sun and he was the darkness that came at night or so he had said one night at the common room back at the compound. He was stoic, grumpy and hardly found himself enjoying somebody's company. You on the other hand, even though you wouldn't consider yourself the most outgoing person like Johnny, still you liked talking unlike him. You loved going out with the task force. And most importantly you loved when Ghost joined because you loved him, you loved having him around, despite his gruff responses or annoyed looks.

You jog though your legs shake and tiredness sets in your body.

"How much farther until we get there?" You ask, ignoring the fact that his frame goes rigid when you speak . He doesn't acknowledge you at first. All you hear is a small sigh leaving his lips. You kind of wish he wasn't wearing the damn sunglasses so you could see his eyes.

They always said a lot.

"Thirty minutes. Give or take." The answer is short and cold, breaking your heart a little more than before. Still, you decide to try again.

"Sir, is something bothering you?" Before he can stop it he scoffs, shaking his head. "What?" Brows furrowing on your features. "Simon..."

He stops all of the sudden, turning to face you with a tense stance.

"First of all don't bloody use my name out here. Secondly it's your own fault we've been walking for hours. So don't go asking if something's bothering me, Sergeant."

Taking a step back you open your mouth.

"My fault? I was doing my job!"

"Didn't know your job was to get your fucking head blown off!!" He seethes. "Fucking hell you can't be this reckless and expect me to clap at your poor acting on the field." Your heart begins to race, he had never said such things to you. Taking a small step back your grit your teeth, you hated that his words were making your eyes blurry. This was the Simon you never wanted to see. And yet there he was. "Now we lost the damn intel thanks to you." He spits. But something isn't adding up.

"It's not just that. You've been acting strange for a few days now, Ghost. Don't come and tell me it's just because I did what I was supposed to do!" He stiffs yet again. Jaw clenching so hard you fear he might break it. "Not missing the way you avoid me ever since..." you close your mouth shut. "The pub..." he shifts his weight from one foot to another. The waves are increasing and now reach your feet, dampening your boots. And then you remember him storming off the local pub before he even finished his own drink. Everyone had heard the hard slap to John's arm when he had tried to calm him down. God why didn't you pay more attention to that moment? Because you both had agreed to keep your distances? And going after him was out of discussion? Then the next day you'd barely seen him, just for a short moment during debriefs and that was it. The moment you had gotten up from your seat he was gone. And today you were supposed to go to a special op that had soon become a problem that eventually led to the two of you in the middle of a beach, it was a cloudy day and if it weren't for the heavy layers you wore you're certain you'd be shaking. Sometimes –and you were ashamed of it– you were oblivious to many things and it seemed that Ghost's anger toward you was one of them this time. "What happened?"

He inhales deeply.

"It's over. That's what happened."

Your heart sinks and you swallow hard. Your whole body loses color when he mutters those two words. Out of all the things, all the possibilities you thought he'd say to you, he decided to end everything. Shaking your head you try to touch his hand but he doesn't let you.

"Ghost where is all of this coming from I don't understand!" You choke out. "We were fine..."

"No. You were fine. If I wasn't enough you should've just said so."

"Stop... you... what the hell are you talking about???"

"Nothing that matters anymore. Keep walking and don't say another word. That's an order."

He turns and keeps walking as if nothing just happened. As if he didn't just completely broke your heart.

'You were fine'.

What was that supposed to mean? You think, walking a few meters behind him, scared to even say anything else; to even try to grab him by the arm and force him to talk. It would only make things worse right now.

By the time you reach the safe house it's started to rain the silence between the two is deafening and tense. Ghost's cold demeanor and hurtful words have left a scar. Never in a million years would you think you'd be here, with a broken, shattered heart and no explanation from his part.

Words that pierced through your soul.

That day something died inside you. And he was the reason.

Two weeks, three days and seven hours.

That's the time that's passed since that day at the beach. Two weeks since Simon broke you and gave you no reasons.

You're a disaster.

You barely eat or get any sleep. There's dark circles under your eyes and you're sure you've lost some weight too. Ghost has been gone on a mission alone with Johnny for a week now, which left you with a lot of spare time to think about the two of you.

More tears stream down your face when you remember that day. Had you missed something important? Was Ghost's mind somewhere dark? Somewhere it shouldn't be? God knows he was... difficult to say the least. But every single time you tried, tried to be there for him. Did those late nights at your home meant nothing? Had he not seen the way you looked at him? Had you not shown him enough of your affection? Everything you'd do for him if he simply asked?

Getting up from your bed you get ready for another day. Not bothering to lace your boots just shoving them inside your shoes you walk down the hallways until you get to the training room. Gaz is talking to John in the far corner, the Captain's arms are crossed over his chest while Kyle frowns and shakes his head. You don't to even go and salute them as you normally would do, instead you put your earphones on and hit the treadmill.

It doesn't last long though; after one minute someone stops it by pressing down the off button. Your brows knitted together as you stop, turning to look up at Gaz who smiles politely.

"Sorry for that, sweetheart. You okay?" You nod, but say nothing more. "Come here." He pats your shoulder and helps you down from the treadmill. If you could smile now you would. But no even the faintest, softest grin leaves your lips. Gaz takes a quick glimpse at your face and rubs the back of his neck. "You know, Soap and Ghost just got back. Heard Lt. was asking about you."

"Oh." You murmur. "Okay." You don't move nor dare to meet his eyes. "I'll just head back to my room."

"Uhmm. I- what I meant is he's looking for you..." Shaking your head you walk away, not having the energy to face Simon right now. And why did he need to see you? Made pretty clear that you two were done, therefore was no need to see each other unless it was work related.

"You really do like it here don't you." Your body goes rigid. This was supposed to be your safe place. The roof of the armory was rarely visited by anyone at this hour. Simon's voice seems softer than ever before but you don't answer. Not even turn to acknowledge him. You hear muttered words and then he crouches down to your level. "Price said you're not eating. Do we have to send you to the military counselor now?" How dare he? After all he caused this. You know he doesn't mean it in bad way, somehow he cares for you deep down. Your hands ball into fists, fighting the urge to snap at him, to push him down and just break him the way he broke you. But you don't because you still love him, and could never bring yourself to hurt him. Simon is staring intently at you, waiting, hoping for any sign. He knows he shouldn't be here. Bloody hell he knows you shouldn't even look his way never again. He deserves it. Every bit of it. "Talk to me, love. Please." It's a low whisper. A plea.

"What do you want Ghost?" You ask softly. Simon leans closer, sitting down with his legs propped up against his chest and arms resting on his knees. It's a funny look for someone his size.

"Jus' wanted to see you." You scoff playing with your hands, refusing to lock eyes with him because if you did you'd be done. "Wanted to explain..."

"Then just do it!" You sob. Your lower lip trembles. "And then leave."

"Fine." He agrees. "But I'm not leaving. I- I made a mistake, and took it out on you okay? I was scared."

"Scared?" Your head snaps to where he is sitting. It's painful just to look at him. "Why would you be scared Ghost?" You retaliate

He grumbles, never fancied when you called him that when you were alone. Quite the contradiction given the fact that he told you not to call him his name that day at the beach.

"Because I saw you." He points out. "That night. Everything you're missing for being with someone like me. Can't even show proper affection because it's not me... and you deserve more than that. More than me."

"Ghost..."

"No. Lemme finish, love." He swallows. It's always amusing how controlled he seems. "I lost it, yeah? You looked so happy. How on earth do I deserve you, on what universe do I deserve ya'?"

Sucking in a sharp breath you recall the moments that preceded the events. The sound of music blasting through the speakers, when you joined the rest of the soldiers on the other side of the pub. Private Miller had slung his arm over your shoulders in a friendly manner. You laughed and drank too much that night, it was joyful. Everyone was there, your team. You never thought he felt that way about it.

"Oh my... Simon." You cover your mouth and cry silently. He hesitated for a moment before pulling you close and into his lap. "Should've known something was wrong. Forgive me... I should've stayed with you, follow you after you left." You cry out.

You were scared too, for very different reasons. That he'd get tired of you eventually, that if you weren't cautious enough your secret would be known. Both would get suspended thus separated and discharged.

"No, love. You shouldn't have to go running after me. I should be running after you. Now forgive me, say you will. Or else I might just lose myself for good." You cradle his face in your hands lifting the balaclava just above the bridge of his nose. Thumb tracing his lower lip. Your tears have dried.

"I've missed you so much, Simon. All you gotta do is talk to me, always." He tightens his grip around you. "You think Price would let us go home tonight and not ask questions?"

His chuckle is short and soft.

"Yeah. I think he's known for a while now."

#cod #call of duty modern warfare 2 #cod mwii #cod mw2 #cod x reader #cod mw22 #cod ghost #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley #simon riley x reader #ghost modern warfare #cod simon riley #call of duty ghost simon riley #cod mw ghost

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loveemagicpeace · 1 year

Text

⭐️Astrology Notes⭐️

🌙Cancers loves sad tattoos or sad stories. Everything related to sadness is actually beautiful to them. They like to express their emotions and sadness out loud. I also see that many times they like teddy bears. And with every moon in Cancer, I saw that they have one tattoo that is sad (for example, a sad angel or something to do with tears.

🌻Mercury in libra are very fast texters. They always take the time to reply to a message. I've never met anyone who had this placement and didn't immediately write back on messages or anything. Sometimes it seems to me that these people always have their phone with them.

🐚Pisces are always so happy when they see that you have noticed them. I always see pure happiness in them when you notice something about them or when you give them something. Because they feel seen and that means a lot to them.

🧩People with Taurus rising are very beautiful, I notice that women often have natural beauty & very nice skin. They are also very charming. Many times they are aware of their value and beauty.

⭐️Sagittarius mars is naturally attractive and has a playful energy. They also have a nicely accentuated body shape. Many times they attract people with their energy, which they have for life. Their energy is always so lighing.

🧸Moon in 4th house synastry creates an atmosphere as if you have known the person for years. You immediately catch a vibe with person and u two can find many things in common. Sometimes it's crazy that it's like that.

🎈People with jupiter in 9th house are always lucky, everything that happens to them in life they always come through somehow happily. Happiness always accompanies them wherever they are. Maybe they don't realize it that way, but Jupiter is very strong when it is in the 9th house and even when things look like they will be bad or problems, Jupiter will solve them.

🎡Jupiter in Pisces also very powerful to have. Luck always accompanies you and things come even when you least expect them. These people don't realize how lucky they really are.

🪴Saturn represents what we most want, but that feels out of reach. 10th house represents our mission in the world. What kind of job might you have that actively enhances your own regeneration rather than just exhausting you or giving you a paycheck. To succeed in finding such a place in the world, the underlying archetypes of your fourth house must inform your outward mission in the community.

🦩Virgo rising can be very insecure, unsure of themselves. The criticisms they have towards themselves are sometimes too big. Many times I notice that they stare at the fact that the work will be approved by others. And they may question the work they do because of that. Be yourself and don't doubt your abilities!

💙Your 9th house sign can show you the types of friends you might not see very often, but when you hang out, you usually have a ton of fun & a lot to catch up on. Your 9th house can also show you the types of people in your life that might be long-distance friends too.

💕4th house It's your safe place, where you go when you don't want others to find you. Your closest friends. Your needs and the home you create for yourself. It represents your comfort and your connection to home. What things do you feel like sharing only with those you trust and love. This is your private life. For ex.: taurus in 4th house can mean that you share your values, food, favorite music, favorite movies,things you like to do, money only with people who are really close to you.

🎨5th house is want we want in relationship, not necessariy what we need. It’s also a house of bravery. How brave are you initiate this first date rigth now and most importantly how much fun we are having together. This is the house of romance, of falling in love(children's love). It shows how we keep romance in a relationship and in what way. How we like to party and what kind of dates we like. But it is also a house of impressions. What kind of impression can a person make on you to charm you (what does he charm you with). For ex.: Gemini in 5th house- can charm you with his communication, nice words, intelligence, random things. Taurus in 5th house- with your favorite music, movies, comfort - maybe with a picnic. Moon in 5th house- with care, emotion, maybe with home vibes date.

-Rebekah🐚🪴🫧

#astrology #energy #zodiac signs #planets #my notes #astrological houses #astrology observations #birth chart

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reveluving · 2 years

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How about Batmom being his wife’s work, people can see there are atracttion , but they never do something about it.

And the kids are tired, because SHE is their mom even when Bruce insist she is a friend and his assistant. Like if there is a mothers day’s event she is the one there.

And of course she give hints, but Bruce make everything hard dating other womens, and Batmom just get tired. So she still remain in contact with the boys, but stop waiting for Bruce

Extra

If he realised that he is gonna lost her, on her wendding day with a guy that the kids like even when they don’t want to, is gonna be the cherry in the top.

"Where are you going kids? And in Tuxedos?"

"God, you never listen anything!"

"To Y/n’s Wedding, Jason is gonna give her"

And the man is just so shocked to talk

Damn. I was not expecting an angsty one??? But screw it, here we are! (For the sake of this piece, this is NOT related to 'A Mother's Touch' series, obv!)

Thanks, anon! ❤

You're right about one thing; the kids may not like the idea of giving away what could've been their mother, but they sure as hell hate seeing Bruce not appreciating you the way they do. You were not only his rock during his lowest, but each and every Batkid in the picture.

So keeping you around was their way to cope with the shit in Gotham.

But...

They wouldn't be able to forgive themselves for being selfish and keeping you here any longer. Not when they know Bruce isn't going to do anything about it. The dejection, the fake smiles you'd put on for the sake of his happiness. It was too much, even for Bruce.

So, the kids let you go. With a heavy heart, of course. Telling you that you deserved better. You didn't want to believe it, but you knew they were right. You knew Bruce felt the same way, but that ego of his was unshakeable.

As soon as you resigned from Wayne Enterprises, they knew it was over. The only thing that kept you all together was the group chat they made. Bruce, too, his heart dropped at the news, but there was a voice at the back of his mind; "I told you so." But he tried to think nothing of it, maybe you wanted to work somewhere else but still keep in touch, right?

He wished.

He should've figured out when he saw Tim, Duke and Damian talking about suit colour they should wear and Cass twirling in a dress in front of her mirror. It wasn't until he finally opened the pretty looking letter on his desk that he's kept aside for so long that he realized why.

He knew he had no business raising his voice when two of his eldest boys came to pick up the rest. Jason was seconds away from giving the man a black eye, but he had a better idea.

"You're lucky that I can't beat the shit out of you. Wouldn't want to ruin this suit when I give ma away," None of them waited for his answer, not when Bruce himself didn't know what to say.

You didn't invite him out of spite or revenge. He was the reason why you've found your beloved, so, if anything, it was a 'thank you'. Though, you had a feeling that he wouldn't attend, and you were right.

Unbeknownst to you, that man you once thought was your one and only never stopped looking at the wedding photos Jason spammed on his phone. Your contagious smile, absolutely stunning in white, in the arms of another. Most importantly, that one big family photo he knew Jason sent with a wicked smile.

You, your new husband, and all of the Batkids. Together.

Alfred could only watch his master with both pity and disappointment.

Bruce never stopped wishing that man of yours was him.

˚ · . f i n . · ˚

Tada! Not the best in angst so this was the best I could do! Ask box is open for your Batmom thoughts; preferably soft or smutty tho because my heart can't handle too much angst 🤧 But thanks again, dear anon!!

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folklvrsworld · 1 year

Text

forget me, not ♧

pairing: harry james potter x fem! reader

warnings: very angsty, argument, memory loss, drinking, a little cussing, kissing

summary: au where the wizarding world is under a curse where each witch/wizard that turns 18 loses all their memories and have to start a new life. takes place after the second wizarding war.

song: arcade - duncan lawrence

-------------------------------------------------------

The one thing I hate about being a witch is that once you turn 18, all your memories with your friends and partner will be gone. As they say, it is a marking of being an adult. Searching for a new life partner, and focusing on your work.

Everyone hates it. Everyone wants to get rid of the stupid curse. But no one can. It has been done since thousands of years ago, and it cannot be undone.

That is why, some people intend to make the best out of their lives before their memories are gone. Make millions of memories with friends, finding a true love, and pretending turning 18 is nothing more than getting older.

But others, choose to lock themselves up. Intending to find happiness and start a life after they've turned 18. Not making any friends, let alone a partner. So they didn't have anything to lose.

As for me, I wanted to lock myself up. The idea of not wasting my time finding friends and a partner who I won't remember, sounded like a good plan to me. But then, it all changed when I went to Hogwarts.

I befriended everyone. I knew everyone. You could even say I became the social butterfly of Hogwarts. I wasn't planning to be one, but from the minute I entered the castle, I just couldn't let myself spend seven years alone.

But most importantly, I found a person who could light up my world in just a second. A person who could make me smile, even in the darkest times. A person who would make me feel safe, even if the world was crumbling beneath my feet.

Harry was the light of my life. We got together at fourth year, with a few bumps here and there, we made it until the end. But after the war ended, we got into a pretty big argument, which made us split.

---- Two Months Ago ----

"What did you just say?" I furrowed my eyebrows angrily, after hearing what he said.

"I'm just saying! Maybe it's better for us to leave now than to experience the pain then. Besides, July is–"

"Two months away, which is still a good amount of time, if you ask me!" I yelled in frustration.

We were in Grimauld Place, we moved in together after the war ended. It was really lovely at first. Getting to live with your boyfriend, spending every hour with him and all.

But these past few weeks, Harry had been really distant from me. He always went out to go somewhere, he told me he was going to the Weasleys—but why did he went every single day.

When he got home today, it was like the usual. We had dinner together, then we relaxed a bit by the fireplace, telling each other how our day went. But then, he suddenly said he wanted to move out.

He claimed that the day both of us will turn 18 is coming very soon. And it would be better for us to separate now then to endure the pain later. That is true, both our birthdays are in July. I'm at the start of the month and he's at the end. But that wasn't a valid excuse for a break up.

"Look, I know you're mad—"

"I'm bloody furious, Harry! So what if it's two months away?! The thing we should be doing is cherish these moments together, make memories, have a good life. Not breaking up!"

"But experiencing memory loss when we're at our highest point, isn't any better, Y/N!" he exclaimed, "Especially for me, since your birthday is earlier and I'll have to wait for 29 godamn days before I lose mine."

He dropped down on the couch with his hands on his face, clearly stressed out. He meant well. I know this is going to be very hard for both of us, especially him. But I wasn't ready to let go.

"Don't think I want any of this, love. I really, really don't." he looked up at me and shrugged, "But what can we do? We knew this was coming."

"Love?" I accidentally blurted out, "If you love me then you would stay here with me and be with each other until our final days! If you love me then you would fight for what we have build since fourth year, not leave me alone in the dark!"

"Y/N, I do love you, you know tha–"

"If you love me then you would fucking tell me where you went everyday, because I know damn well you're not going to the Weasleys."

Anger was slowly building up inside me, "And for all I know, you could be meeting up with another girl."

He stared up at me for a couple of seconds, before slowly standing up. "So that's what you think?"

I nodded my head. "Yes. You're not denying."

He chuckled. An angry chuckle. He took a deep nasty breath, before looking at me in the eyes. His eyes which were once filled with love and kindness, now filled with anger and disappointment.

"You wanna know where I was? Fine." he went to a desk and pulled out a bunch of papers, shoving it into my hands, "Read."

I looked down at the papers and did as he told. It was job applications. Turns out he had been going to the ministry, trying to get a job as an auror. Something he had always dreamed of.

"Harry I–"

"No, you listen. I have been trying to get a job so I can provide us with what we need. I have been planning to buy you a house so once we lose our memories, so you have somewhere to stay." he growled.

"But what did you accuse me as? A cheater."

A big part of me felt guiltier than ever. I didn't mean to accuse him of such a thing, if I knew what he was up to, I would be overwhelmed. But a small part of me was also angry. Angry that he didn't tell me about it, resulting in this big fight.

In the heat of the moment, instead of saying sorry, I accidentally let my anger side off.

"Well how the fuck was I suppose to know!? You go out everyday before I even woke up, everytime you get home you're often pissed at me, and your excuse was the Weasleys!"

"If you had told me sooner, none of this would've happened—"

"Oh so it's my fault, when all I was trying to do was give you a nice surprise!?" he raised his voice even more.

The fight went on for what felt like hours. We were both angry, we were both disappointed at each other, we both thought ourselves were to blame. But we couldn't seem to stop.

"You know what. You wanna leave? Then leave. Who knows, maybe you'll find someone out there who can keep you company while I lose my memories." I scoffed.

He breathed out heavily, with his fists and jaw clenched, staring at me with the deadliest eyes ever. "Fine. I will. Grimauld place is yours. And if you care—this time, I'm really going to the Weasleys."

The next thing I knew, he packed all of his stuff and apparated. He even left his promise ring at what used to be our room. That's when I knew, I've lost him, forever.

---- Present Time ----

I fiddled with my ring as I remember the fight that caused all this, then his ring which I wore on top of mine. I couldn't help but think, that if I had just said sorry, none of this would've happened. He would still be here with me.

"Y/N/N? Y/N! Earth to Y/N..."

I finally snapped back to reality and shook my head, "Hm? What? Sorry, I dozed off a bit. Don't worry, it's not my memories. Besides I still got–" I looked at the clock, "Three hours until midnight."

"Don't remind me." Hermione groaned, "I just can't believe this is really happening. I'm going to lose my bestfriend.."

I sighed deeply and grabbed her hands, "Oh 'Mione, don't say that..Who knows, maybe we'll find our way back to each other one day. Besides, I work at the ministry."

What better way to spend your last hours of remembering your childhood with your bestest friend. Even if Harry and I broke off two months ago, Hermione and I are still friends. So, we decided to go out and drink a bit before I'm completely gone.

"Have you heard any news on Draco?" I asked, Hermione seemed to go a little uneasy at the question. I don't blame her, Draco was her ex lover, and just last month—she lost him.

"Uhm..Blaise said he's still working as a healer, he got an apartment near St. Mungos, everything seems to be going great for him." she smiled sadly.

I sighed and stroked her hand, "I-I'm so sorry Hermione, I shouldn't have asked..."

"No, it's alright. Really." she smiled.

Subconsciously, I continued fiddling with the rings. It's the only thing that made me feel like he's still here with me. "You're thinking about him aren't you..?" she asked.

"Him who?"

"Oh come on, Y/N/N. We both know who I'm talking about." she sighed, "I could ask Ron how he's doing, but he doesn't remember me."

I gulped and took my hand out from under the table, bluntly staring at the rings, "I just wished he would be here one last time, before I completely go blank."

"I mean—its mad, right? The only thing we lose are memories with our childhood friends and our childhood partner. Everything else stays the same."

"Yeah...but at least we won't forget about magic, that would've been a hundred times worse." she chuckled lightly.

"I should get going, after all these years I still have curfew." she groaned, "Are you gonna be alright on your own?"

I nodded my head and smiled, "Yes, Hermione. It's alright. Go, you don't want to be grounded."

She stood up and I did as well, before pulling her in for the tightest hug ever. I'm going to miss her. So so much.

"I'll miss you, Y/N." she sniffled.

"I'll miss you too, Hermione. Take care, yeah?" I stroked her back comfortingly.

After she left, I stayed at the bar for a couple more drinks. Since I'm a pureblood, I won't get drunk, which is a huge perk. Time went by, I looked at the clock again. 11 PM. One hour until midnight.

I decided it was enough drinking for tonight. I walked out of the bar and walked slowly, reminiscing the air and my surroundings. That is until it started to rain.

"Just fucking great." I muttered, I didn't have any umbrella with me, so I walked in the rain.

As I walked down the road, I heard footsteps behind me. At first, I thought it was just a stranger walking behind me. But somehow, the footsteps got closer and closer.

So, I turned around, hoping to see Hermione or someone I didn't know.

But turns out...it was him.

"Out here in the rain, are you? Want an umbrella?"

"No thanks, Grimauld place isn't far from here after all." I said, staying still at where I'm standing.

"Are you mad? This is Shaftsbury Avenue.." he chuckled lightly, approaching me.

I rolled my eyes, "Well I was going to apparate, dumbass."

I looked up at a big TV screen and saw that it was 11.55, 5 minutes until midnight. I gulped and stared at the man in front of me. How I wanted to jump into his arms and kiss him right then and there.

"Y/N, listen.."

"No, Harry. You listen." I sighed and approached him, "I'm sorry. I'm so incredibly sorry, for everything I said and did. I should've appreciated what you were doing for me instead of causing a big fight."

"This was all my fault! Truth is, I wasn't ready to let you go. I'm still not ready. And I can't believe in five minutes, I'm not going to know who you are!" I cried out.

"I am so so thankful for you and everything you have done for me, Harry. If I could go back and just apologize, we wouldn't have left with a big fight. Harry, I'm so—" I got cut off by him pulling me closer to him by the waist.

He took off the hood of his jacket, so I can look at his face clearer. He hasn't changed one bit. His beautiful green eyes were filled with love and passion, his lips curled into a warm smile.

"Don't apologize. It was wrong for me to be so suspicious. I shouldn't have used the Weasleys for an excuse. I'm so sorry, my love." he sighed.

My love. He is my love. I am his.

"I love you, Harry. I never stopped loving you. The second you walked out of that door, I regretted everything. I missed you so much."

He cupped my face and stroked it, wiping away my tears and placing a comforting kiss on my nose, "I love you too, Y/N. I will always love you."

- 11.57 -

With that, he leaned in and we kissed like never before. The kiss was filled with love, passion, protection, promise, desire, and sadness at the same time.

It felt like we were the only two people in the world. Standing on the side of the road, head to toe drenched in rain, but we didn't care. We found our way back to each other.

I felt his heartbeat on mine. His lips moved in sync with mine, just like how I remembered it. I felt safer than ever. I felt more comfortable than ever. Finally, I was back with my love.

He interlocked our hands together, his other hand stroking my hair and cheeks. My other hand buried in his hair, just how he liked it.

- 11.58 -

When we couldn't breathe anymore, we pulled away from each other. Still holding each other close, I took off his promise ring from my finger and slipped it onto his finger.

"Wear it. Please. So you'll remember me."

He smiled sadly at it and nodded, "I will, love. I'll never take it off. I promise."

He kissed my head, his ring, and mine. He pulled me in to a tight hug, his head resting on mine, my arms wrapped around his waist, as tears fall down both our faces.

- 11.59 -

He kept whispering reassuring things in my ear, my brain replaying every memory I had of my friends and him. In a minute, it will all be gone.

"We'll find each other in the new life, princess. I know we will. I'll stop at nothing to find you and be with you again."

"Don't forget me, Harry. Not until you lose your memories." I sniffled.

We pulled away from each other and admired each other's faces. Smiling as much as we can, and giving each other gentle pecks.

- 00.00 -

"Happy birthday, my love.."

The clock ding-ed. My mind went blank. I blacked out for half a second, before regaining consciousness and staring at the man in front of me.

"Hello, who are you? Did you need anything?" I asked with a smile.

The man shook his head, "No, you just dropped your umbrella. I was going to give it back to you." he said as he gave me what seemed to be my umbrella.

"Oh, okay. Thank you."

He nodded, "You're welcome. You should go back home, the rain is getting really heavy."

I thanked him once more before turning away and starting to walk. But before I could, I asked him, "Have we met before?"

He chuckled and shrugged, "Maybe we've bumped to each other here and there. It's a small world."

I chuckled as well and nodded, turning away and walked along the road. If I'm being honest, I think I've seen him before. Nevertheless, he was kind of cute.

#harry james potter #hogwarts #harry james potter x reader #harry james potter x y/n #harry potter #harry james potter imagine #harry potter angst #wizarding world #alternate universe

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olivereliocorcordium1983 · 3 months

Text

Now that I have gotten out of the fanfic bubble for a minute, let me just say, that one: I am not very happy with this woman who decided to come into Armie's life and pull this shit with him after everything that has happened to him. Why? yes, I know Armie is a big boy his life is his and he can do what he wants I'm all for that just like Timmy.

However, it kills me to see that he is trying to better himself (like most of us in this world who were abused by someone) and trying to become a better person just for someone to come along and have written on their story this long nice thing about Armie.

Just to turn around and be dumb as hell and write, "super interested in psychopaths" Armie is not a psychopath. Like most of us who end up abused, he is a human being trying to better himself, and become a better version of himself after the fact. And try his best to see the better in people but end up with people who either

want there 15 minutes of fame, because they heard about all the crap that was going on with him and saw and thought to themselves "oh my god! drama let me see for myself what this is about." Hello serial killer lovers of Jeffery Dahmer, Ted Bundy ect.

They only want to be with you because either you are rich as hell and want that big green and will sweet talk your way into it. Having no actual care in the world for the other person at all. Or you have something else that the person wants.

We find someone and think, "okay this is it. Maybe I will try just one more time. Maybe this time will be different." just for them to cheat, lie, and make excuses for their actions because they don't want to take accountability.

Which just instills for those of us who have to or are trying to rewire our thinking from the abuse, that this is just another person who proved to us that we can't open up to anyone. And that there probably isn't a real genuine human being out there who will love us (other than our mommas, grandmas and sisters if you have them in your life or at all) for just us and actually want to see us happy, and actually want to be with us. Instead of adding to the already warped way we end up seeing the world thanks to the abusers.

Now let me clairify this: I am not talking about the "I'm gonna die alone." #foreveralone bs. that people do when they can't stand to be by themselves. NO. I am talking about actually have been alone, can stand and be okay with being alone but, want to experience a real loving relationship that actually lasts with someone who isn't toxic.

It breaks my heart that both Timmy and Armie have to result to having people like this around them in their lives. Or that these people end up finding them. Both of them deserve to be happy, healthy and more importantly they deserve to be with people who will treat them like they deserve. For whom they actually are and not the way Hollywood perceives them to be.

And I have to say after all this shit.... Armie you need to get with Timmy, you two need to go snag Luca and hop your asses on a plane get far away from Hollywood. Go back to Crema, turn off your damn phones and just breath for awhile and this is not me hinting at the sequel as much as I would love that.

These two men need to be around each other again and a hell of a lot more often to keep both of them from doing stupid shit. Like this. Seriously, guys I love you both but you need to focus on yourselves, Armie (your kids) rather than getting into PR bs and having toxic people invade your spaces. Stop jumping pussy and get back to talking about the things that matter. 🙄🙄

Luca, I know you are a busy man, but could you please at some point when you are not so busy to kidnap your boys and take them back to Italy with you.

And Two: WHO IS READY FOR THE CRAZINESS TO GET BACK TO SOME RESEMBLENCE OF NORMALCY? SHOW OF HANDS ANYBODY? 🙌🏻

#cmbyn #callmebyyourname #armiehammer #timotheechalamet #elio and oliver #charmie #tiredofthetoxicmonkeycircus

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boliv-jenta · 9 months

Text

No outbreak Joel Miller x inexperienced f!reader

Dave York x inexperienced f!reader

WC:3.2k

Summary: Dave and Joel make your birthday party memorable.

Warnings: Dub con. Dark Joel. Dave being Dave. Unprotected P in V sex. Anal. Degradation. Dirty talk.

Trigger warning: implying women who dress a certain way are asking for men to use them. That is obviously bullshit. This is fiction.

Summer Schooled

Part 1 | Part 2

Masterlist

The party was going well. People were enjoying themselves. You were enjoying yourself, for the most part. The night would be a lot more comfortable for you if your panties weren't soaked through. Going up to your room to change them was too great a risk with Joel's words ringing in your ears "Just you wait until I find a way to get you alone."

Those words had been whispered in your ear when he'd greeted you with a hug to wish you a Happy Birthday. Since you had only lived here for the summer and you only had a handful of friends, your mom had decided to invite the neighbourhood. A little joint birthday/off to college/get to know the neighbours party. Unfortunately, you already knew a couple of neighbours particularly well. One was giving you daggers from the moment he saw the dress you were wearing. The other caught you in the kitchen grabbing a soda.

"I think I'd better renegotiate my terms with Joel. You are begging to be fucked in that dress. What do you say? I'll tell Carol I have to go into the office. Then I'll give you a birthday treat?"

Luckily, the hand Dave had been running up the back of your thigh moved to grab a snack when someone came in behind you.

Since then, you had been very careful not to be alone. You didn't trust either man not to follow you and fuck you with people around. More importantly you didn't trust yourself to say no.

The playlist you'd picked seemed to be a winner. People were dancing as well as mingling and talking. You got on the makeshift dance floor to take a spin round it. Thankfully neither Dave or Joel were there to watch at that point. Part of you hoped they had skulked off to jerk themselves off. Maybe then they'd calm down. The testosterone coming off them in waves every time a boy your age came near you was ruining your underwear. Thankfully, the two of them were out of sight. You took a moment to collect yourself, leaning on the wall just inside the kitchen and letting the tiled surface of it cool you. A smile was on your face as you watched your mom have a go at the latest Tiktok dance.

Suddenly, the room was plunged into near darkness. The music stopped. Confused voices took its place.

"The lights are on across the way. It must be the breaker." You heard your mom's voice.

Just as people started to switch on their phone flashlights, a large hand clamped over your mouth. A strong arm wrapped around your waist. In tandem, they pulled you back into the walk-in pantry. Those hands then moved to squeeze your breasts. A small gasp torn from your throat. They then skimmed down your curves until they found your thighs. Before moving up to cup your wet sex through the damp material there. You should have stopped him. People were only a few feet away. Then his finger dipped inside you, stretching you around them. His other hand found your clit. Making you work harder to keep in your moans. His lips found your bare shoulder. Plush, warm lips. A clean shaven cheek dragged across your skin as he moved to your neck.

"Dave?!" Panic flared in you. You tried to pull away but he spread his fingers and kept you speared there.

"Sshhh. Not so loud. You don't want people to find us. Especially not Joel, who I know did this to ruin your party and get you away from those boys." That was your thinking too. That's why you had assumed it was Joel who grabbed you. "What a naughty boy. We should teach him a lesson. Imagine how mad he'll be when he comes to play with this little cunt and it's already filled with my cum again? I bet he'd punish you real well."

You didn't have to tell Dave your view on that. Your pussy did it for you, leaking onto his hand. "Dirty fucking girl! I'm going to keep your mouth covered. You play with that clit nice and fast. I'm going to use your tight pussy to get this done quickly before he comes looking."

This was a bad choice and you knew it. The journey down that rabbit hole was well underway. Between last night and Joel teaching you how to sixty-nine this morning, you might as well be fucked in a pantry with your mom a few feet away. There was no redeeming you now.

Dave's cock was at your entrance before you knew it. He had the courtesy to pull your hips back slowly to push inside. Everything was still tender from last night. Even your jaw ached, which didn't seem to matter. Dave didn't seem like he was going to kiss you. This was more a functional fucking. He was going to fill you and send you to Joel. You had to admit when he was goal oriented, Dave got the job done. He'd pulled you up onto your tipple toes and squatted down a little so he could angle towards your g-spot. His thrusts were hard and fast but not without purpose. Your hand worked with them to get you off fast. Surprisingly so as you shuddered in his grip.

"Fuck. Yes. Dirty girl, soaking my cock. Fuck, bend over." Dave near bent you in two and started fucking you faster as you grabbed the wall above your head to steady you. "Shit. This tight little cunt takes my big, fat cock so well…I…." The quiet whine that left him made you flutter around him.

It was thrilling to make a big intimidating man weak for you. He continued to moan as he pumped more of his spend into you before dragging your underwear back up. You were just fixing your dress as the lights came back on. Turning to Dave you watched him tuck his cock back in and fix his outfit.

For a moment from the way he looked at you, you thought he might kiss you instead he grabbed your pussy. "Keep these on until Joel peels them off." Then he was gone. Giving it what you thought was enough time. You slipped out of the pantry only to run into your mom.

"There you are, Sweetie. Are you okay?" She cradled your cheek for a second. "Yeah, I was just getting more sauces when the lights went out."

"Oh. Well, it's fixed now. Joel took care of it. He's such a good neighbour. Oh, Sweetie, it looks like you spilled something on your dress. What is that? Ranch?" Before she looked closer. One of her friends came to grab her attention.

When she moved away you could see Joel standing behind her, seething at the fact that you were definitely not covered in ranch.

"My friend invited me to a bar. I might go after I tidy up. If that's okay with you? Your friends can stay over. Dave and the Morgans are going to be home if you need anything."

Just before you moved here, your mom got out of a crappy marriage to your step dad. She still made you her number one priority but you could see she was lonely. "Go now, Mom. We'll clean up." A couple of the people milling around agreed."

Dr and Mrs Morgan helped to clean up quickly with their son who was a little younger than you. When you finished you made sure to thank them all. Joel helped too. In fact he insisted on staying to help as he waved the Morgans off. "It's fine Melissa. You get your boy home. Sarah went back off to her spa weekend with the York girls. I got time."

Thankfully most of the tidying was done when Joel stalked back into the kitchen. Stopping short of you he pulled up a chair. "Now, Honey, are there some things you'd like to tell me?"

"Like what?" You didn't meet his gaze.

"How about you wearing this dress around those boys? And having one stay to help you?"

A laugh bubbled out of you. "Josh? His mom's aren't the only ones that are gay."

"The kids still young, he might be looking to experiment, and there you are in that slutty little outfit, parading around in front of him with a cum stain on it."

"I…" your cheeks burned with embarrassment.

"Now, why don't you tell me about Dave? Did I not suck that pussy hard enough this morning that you had to throw it on his dick?" His tone was eerily calm despite his words. "Take it off."

"What?"

"Take it off." There was a bite there now. "Take all of it off. The slutty fucking dress. The cum filled panties. Take. It. Off."

A tremor developed in your hands as you complied. Once you were naked in front of him. He leaned back in his chair.

"Now, what am I going to do with you?" He fished your panties from on top of your discarded dress. He held them in one hand as he spoke. "Did you enjoy taking Dave's cock again?"

When you didn't answer he slammed his fist onto the table. He didn't scare you but the shock of it forced out an answer. "Yes!"

"He told me he made you touch yourself until you came. Is that right?"

"Yes."

"Show me."

"What?"

"Sit your ass on the edge of this table. Spread your legs and show me how you touched yourself for him."

Once you were situated he pulled his chair up between your legs. "Go on."

Hesitantly you began to touch your clit. "Joel, the door isn't locked. The windows."

The blinds were still open in the kitchen. Anyone could see.

Joel laughed bitterly. "You've paraded that barely covered ass around. Your tits were almost spilling out and a married man fucked you in the kitchen with people a few feet away. It's a bit late to be modest. This is what I was talking about. You need to whore fucked out of you before you end up on your knees in some college circle jerk having a bunch of boys blow their loads over you."

Nodding you carried on working your clit. Thanks to earlier it did take long for you to come again. Shrinking under Joel intense gaze you barely made a sound. A little whimper came out as you quivered.

"Look at that." Joel's face was inches away from your pussy now. "Those little twitches are pumping all of Dave's cum out. It'd be a shame to waste it." With that he stood, pushing you back onto the table. The motion parted your legs and he slipped in between them. One of his hands pushed your thighs apart while the other gathered yours and Dave combined cum. You moaned at the intrusion when he started to slather it over your asshole, pressing his fingertips in ever so slightly with each pass.

"Maybe the problem is that I haven't claimed all your holes yet. I've painted your cunt. You've swallowed my cum. Now.." he pushed his finger in more, causing you to hiss. "Hush now, Darlin'. I'll admit I was mad before but now I'm just taking care of you. You don't want to go off to college and settle for some kid awkwardly jack rabbiting until he squirts into a condom just because you're horny. Let me satisfy you good and proper. Let me fuck some of those hormones out. Relax, just take it."

The finger at your hole pushed in more as he thumbed your clit. "Oh, good girl. There you go." His knuckle popped past your tight ring. "Gonna fuck your hole with my finger for a little while. Gotta get you good and ready for my cock." He felt you tense around him at the thought of taking his cock if just one finger was this tight. "Welcome to the adult world, Sweetheart. Your choices have consequences. You let another man come in my pussy. Now I have to fuck your hole whether you like it or not. See how I'm being kind, getting you all wet and prepared. What do you say?"

When you didn't instantly answer he pushed another finger in. "Oh. Fuck. Thank you, Joel."

"Good girl. You deserve a treat. Nothing but the best for my girl." His thumb was replaced by his lips as he sucked hard on your clit. The pleasure was so intense he managed to start on finger number three. Once you came again he used that to coat his cock, dipping it inside you and thrusting languidly until he was covered.

"Here, hold your knees up for me, Sweet Girl. Good." With you spread open he pushed in slowly. The burn was laced with ecstasy. It took a moment for the burn to fade then you moaned at the fullness stimulating all your delicate nerves.

"Fuck every hole on you is perfect." Joel wasn't in a hurry to finish. He pumped himself inside you leisurely. "You know. I think I've decided that I don't want you fucking any boys. I saw the way you were dancing with the girls out there. How you giggle and flushed when they accidently touched you. I think you'd be happy to get off with them." The thought made your throat dry. You couldn't deny it so you just lay there taking what he was giving you his cock, his proclamations. "When you go back east to college I'm gonna get lonely. I might need some material to keep me going. You could send me some pictures of that pretty face buried in a pussy. Maybe at the holidays you can bring a friend over? I'm a good host. I'd make you comfortable. One of you could sit on my cock and the other on my face." His thrusts stayed slow and shallow as he continued. "Or I could fill you while you make her come. Hell, maybe I'd even forgive Dave enough to let him join. We could see who could fuck you senseless first. I do sort of owe him." The chuckle he let out caused his cock to jump inside you. "We were going to share you at first but then I tasted that pussy on your fingers. I knew you had to be mine. Dave gets enough pussy anyway. When I wouldn't let him come over earlier he sent me a photo an hour later of some woman's face covered in his cum. He's pissed that you get him so worked up."

The thought of the two of them wanting you added to the tingle Joel's cock was nudging against through the thin wall of your pussy. Just as you finally started to fully relax around him and Joel bottomed out with a sigh, your phone rang. It was still on the table from where you had been cleaning earlier.

"Shit. It's my mom!" Joel barely reacted. He picked up the phone, answered it and put it on speaker. "Hi, mom. What's up?" It was a strain to keep your voice level as Joel pushed as deep in as he could and held himself there.

"The bar was super busy. We decided to come back. We'll be about five to ten minutes. I hope you don't mind. I heard none of your friends stayed."

"No. I was tired so I sent them home. I'm going to bed now."

"Oh, okay. We'll be quiet."

"Thanks. Bye, Mom."

As she said bye Joel hung up for you. "I guess we better be quick."

"Quick? No, Joel, she said five minutes. I need to get up to bed. You need to leave." You tried to sit up.

"No." Rough grabbed your tit to push you down. "You need to learn your lesson. Trust me." When you tried to argue he stuff you panties that he'd left balled up on the table into your mouth.

"Joel, please." You sobbed around them. It turned into a muffled scream as he started to thrust in aid of his release.

"This is what you need to learn, Baby. Look at how you've got me and Dave. He couldn't nut on your pretty face so he got some bored waitress to blow him. You've got me rambling about fantasies while balls deep in you. This is what you do to men.You momma could walk in right now and she couldn't blame me. This is all you. It's all your fault."

Whether it was his words or the pain of the new pace and depth, tears spilled from your eyes. "Stop. Joel. Stop, please." You couldn't have your mom see this.

"You don't mean that. Here." His fingers aggressively rubbed your clit. Your body reacted in spite of you. An orgams built quickly as Joel continued to use your ass.

"I didn't mean to make you cry, Baby. I'm just looking out for you. You need to know the truth. Men are going to be feral for you. You need to keep yourself safe without me. This is what could happen. They could be in you and not be able to stop themselves. You can take it though, my strong girl." His thrusts were still deep and strong but now they were erratic. "Take it just a little more. I'm almost there. Come on, come for me. Come while I fill you. Oh, fuck. Oh shit, Princess." The sight of Joel arching between your legs as he helplessly shot load after load inside you made you come. It was fucked up. He used you, degraded you. Ignored your pleas to stop, even if you didn't mean it. It was wrong. So fucking wrong. Still with what little strength was left in your rung out body you flung yourself at him, taking all the kisses he had denied you in anger.

"Oh, Sweetness. I'm glad you're not angry. I took it a little far. You know it's because I care right?" You nodded against his neck as you rested there a minute. "Speaking of which, you go get a shower. I'll clean up here." You looked at the once tidy table now covered in something that definitely wasn't ranch.

Over the sound of the spray of the water against your most intimate area, you heard your mom arrive home and a muffled conversation. When you got into bed, there was a text from Joel waiting for you.

I told your mom I sent you to bed while I tidied. Poor you, you were so tired. If you're sore in the morning. Come over and I'll eat your ass until you feel better.

It made your clean skin feel dirty. You wanted to go over there now and let him do whatever he wanted to do to your body. Deciding not to reply to him for fear of asking if you could come over and arousing your mom's suspicions, you set your phone down. After a moment it pinged. It was a message tone that was completely unfamiliar to you.

You naughty girl. You got me in trouble with Joel. He's not happy that I used your pussy.

The message disappeared a few seconds after you read it. Another one appeared.

He thinks that it's his. You and I know better. Don't we, Babygirl?

#pedro pascal character fanfiction #joel miller #dave york #joel miller x f!reader #dave york x f!reader #smut #tw: dubcon #tw: allusions to abuse

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pineapplerightsideupcake · 5 months

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I’ve been struggling how to word this, and I’m sure it sounds terrible, but I don’t have much sympathy for de trans ppl. I’m not saying they deserve it or that I’m happy some suffered, especially if they’re young but it’s really difficult to hold sympathy and concern when most trans ppl are very obnoxious and delusional. Let me explain: I have a lot of trans friends that it’s very difficult to get them to listen and they’re very stuck in their mindset. I know a guy who looks like a man, calls himself nonbinary and has said he uses the woman bathroom. He takes estrogen and use to have a big beard. I asked him why he wasn’t shaving before and he said his beard doesn’t cause him dysphoria….it seems like a lot of trans ppl are very narcissistic and don’t listen anyway. It’s like when you’re trying to help someone and they keep rejecting you and falling deeper. I am worried one of my friends will definitely de transition in the future, and by then well, it’s gonna be too late, the testosterone has done its damage and she will suffer. I read the de trans subreddit, and I do feel sorry for some and most talk about isolating themselves from family and friends. sorry this is getting long. I feel bad about it, and I’m trying to hard to emphasize but many trans ppl make it difficult. It feels like a massive “I told you so” situation. Please give me advice on how to develop a kinder understanding so I can stop feeling guilty…..

So I wanted to take my time to answer this one because I think this taps into an especially heinous thing the modern left + social media has done to people and it’s the belief that a good person has endless empathy for everyone always and has special empathy for marginalized people.

But here’s the truth. You literally aren’t built for it. At the most basic psychological level you are not designed to have deep empathy for strangers. Your brain has a hierarchy of how much you care about others and a healthy mind prioritizes the people closest to you. More importantly, love and empathy are finite. You actually do have a limit on how many people you can truly care about. That’s not my opinion it’s proven science. We have a literal number (I think it’s about 80).

So it’s a beautiful thing when we care about people outside of our circle. It’s even more beautiful when we care about people far away that aren’t like us. But it’s beautiful precisely because it isn’t natural. It’s a conscious effort to care enough about earthquake victims on the other side of the planet to donate and raise awareness.

My point being that it’s okay that you don’t overflow with love for a group that is hostile towards you AND is full of narcissistic trenders. You can have sympathy for the people that regret surgery without absolving them. And maybe I intuitively understood this because I had to love so many addicts growing up. But empathy doesn’t mean never holding people accountable. It breaks my heart that my aunt has emphysema but she brought that fate on herself, one cigarette at a time. You can have sympathy for people with genuine dysphoria and still think they’re deluded. You can have sympathy for people that were brainwashed as kids and still expect them to examine their values. And you can think others are just self absorbed assholes. You can condemn the patriarchy for convincing so many young that they are worthless that they are choosing the Trans man path and still hold them accountable for throwing around homophobic slurs. You can have sympathy for trans women that are fighting sepsis from bottom surgery and still regard most of them as sex pests.

Empathy is finite. It is not on or off. It is not something we owe to a person because they are struggling.

Treat the people around you with kindness and respect. Pour your energy into a few meaningful things instead of dozens of empty ‘causes’. Torturing yourself over if you feel nice enough on the inside is so…Catholic. It’s female socialization.

Breathe. You’re a good person.

#radical feminism #radical feminist safe #radical feminist community #radical feminists do interact #radical feminists do touch #radblr #radical feminists please interact #feminism #radical feminists please touch #anon asks

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pomplalamoose · 2 months

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If you are ever down I would love your take on a Luke with a ND partner, maybe one who isn't expressive or picks up on social cues. says what ever comes to mind. Takes things a little too literally, is blunt in conversations. Like someone who struggles with their tone so people think they're bored or mean when they really have constantly racing thoughts and new ideas and are always open to new relationships.

I'm pretty sure it has never taken me this long to answer an ask before, but I wanted to make sure I'd put the same time and effort into yours as I did with every other one so far. Sadly I never seemed to get the free time to do so until now, so I REALLY want to thank you for your patience, anon, and hope you're happy with the result🩵

Please note though that for requests like these I'm only able to draw from my own experiences which possibly differ from those of others.

Accordingly nothing I said about "you" is meant to impose any kind of insinuations about behavioral patterns on those reading this, nor is it my intention to criticize or sound harsh in any way.

It goes without saying that Luke, as a friend as well as a partner, couldn't be any more wonderful to be around and I believe that especially for someone on the neurodivergent spectrum it's basically a dream come true to date him.

(Apart from that he's definitely that one friend who listens to you when you think nobody else does and waits for you when you need to stop to tie your shoe laces.)

He's empathetic and sensitive to the emotions of those surrounding him and thus would never make you feel like you don't belong, are weird for acting a certain way, or like you'd be better off pretending to be something you're not to "fit in".

And while Luke's connection to the Force certainly adds a lot to the fact that he has no trouble reading you, he would manage to just as well without it.

Still there's no denying how useful his abilities could prove themselves to be in a relationship, especially should his partner struggle with expressing themselves.

I won't go into much more detail though, because many of the things I already talked about in my other posts regarding his understanding and supportive character can be applied here as well.

(e.g. Master Luke Skywalker headcanons, Luke with a partner on their period, Luke x a reader with mental health issues, breaking down in front of Luke)

However I think it'd be really interesting to take a look at his initial reaction to getting to know a neurodivergent person with the behavioral features you described since I believe they differ depending on which Luke era we're talking about.

• ANH Luke wouldn't even bat an eye

• on Tatooine everyone has to put up a rough exterior in order to protect oneself

• it's not a place of friendly conversations and common niceties; people know they're better off minding their business and staying on their own

• you're very blunt and speak your mind?

• you seem unfazed, even bored during most encounters?

• good for you, it's not easy to navigate this corner of the galaxy and much safer to hold others at a distance

• growing up Luke came across a wild array of all kinds of beings too, one more interesting (and really scary) than the other

• he's not put off, instead even used to supposed unfriendliness

• also he doesn't know anything about where you're from and your people, maybe that's just the way they are and how you were raised?

• he probably thinks you're very cool too

• because surely you have seen a lot? Been on great adventures across the galaxy?

• he really wants to do the same

• if you come across as mean without meaning to it's not a big deal, it only makes him want to spend even more time with you

• ("if mean, then why friend-shaped??")

• most importantly ANH Luke judges a person more by their actions than their words, so there is absolutely no need to worry about how he may perceive you

• it's safe to say you're not getting rid of him as it's nearly impossible to shake him off once he decides he wants to be someone's friend

• he's more than delighted once you get to know each other better and it turns out his intuition was right!

• ESB Luke, on the other hand, may be a bit slower to come around

• not necessarily because he dislikes you but because he doesn't have the time nor the patience to put effort into really getting to know you

• people talk and so he probably heard a thing or two that has him eyeing you curiously

• most likely he won't pay you much mind as he's gone most of the time anyways

• generally speaking though, I think you'd get along pretty well, Luke is a friendly and open minded person after all and would surely grow fond of your quirks before even knowing about their source

• still there's a possibility of the two of you butting heads should it come to an actual meeting

• nothing really severe, of course, but still I can see Luke growing easily frustrated at, for example, your lack of expression, or at your questions when you don't quite get something and want to make sure you understood everything correctly

• and while he's not going to show it or tell you outright that he thinks you're a bit annoying, he's not that good at surpressing dramatic sighs or a roll of his eyes

• HOWEVER if you catch him off guard with blunt words said in a tone that could come across as mean it could definitely get a rise out of him

• after all we get to see that he has developed a certain attitude; he's snippy, quick to talk and slightly judgemental

• (mainly towards Han and Yoda but I can see him acting this way quite often because of all that he's being put through)

• I'm sure that under different circumstances Luke wouldn't react as strongly but with how things are during ESB he might hurt your feelings without meaning to

• once the dust settles and he has a quiet moment to himself he'll feel awful though and most likely seek you out to make amends

• naturally RotJ Luke is a different story altogether

• (the character development this man went trough is absolutely crazy, and I'm amazed every time I do comparisons like these)

• before even taking to you for the first time he'd regard you with a warmth and patience you seldom get to experience

• he quietly smiles to himself when he overhears you having a conversation in that special way of yours or when he senses something sparking an idea

• he appreciates your bluntness

• maybe at first you'd think he's laughing at you but don't worry, he just thinks you're cute

• he feels you in the Force, senses your excitement, your curiosity

• it draws him in

• he is able to see you as a whole, not just what you present on the outside, and so isn't deterred by what others would view as a potential attack or criticism

• (take notes ESB Luke)

• once you've grown closer he's always there to point out social clues you might have missed and/or walks you through certain situations to explain how your behavior might have looked to others when it's something you're worried about

• often he knows what you're going to say before you do and, if that's what you want, gives you a sign you agreed upon, letting you know if maybe it'd bet better for you to be silent instead

• (he absolutely explains dumb sexual jokes to you when you don't get them and I don't care how self indulgent this is, I could really use someone to do that for me, thank you very much)

#ask #luke skywalker #luke skywalker x reader #luke skywalker x you #luke skywalker x oc #luke skywalker fanfiction #gn reader #star wars #luke star wars #star wars fanfiction #star wars a new hope #star wars empire strikes back #star wars return of the jedi #fanfic #star wars headcanons #luke headcanons #headcanons

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alexiswritingstuff · 9 months

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Hello! I was wondering if you’d be okay with writing a Gus piece where maybe Gus and the reader are having an argument and the reader gets scared or flinches if he says something (in THE tone). Naturally, he feels really guilty and comforts the reader or something with a happy ending? Thank you!

Okay, this took wayyyyyy to long to write, and I'm very sorry to the person who requested this. I really hope that you like this, and that I conveyed this in a way that feels natural, but most importantly correct. And that it's also what you wanted.

Just a truck.

Pairing: Gustavo Fring x Gender neutral reader.

Content: hurt/comfort.

Warnings: arguments, implied past abuse and/or trauma.

A/N: If anyone has any issues with phrasing, anything, then please inform me! The last thing that I want to do is offend someone with my writing.

I would also like to say that this fic is very long, so please grab a drink, take a seat and a snack.

I hope you enjoy!

More Gustavo fics.

Taglist- @sukunamybeloved - @viviennemuerte - @miwagila - @marksassybanana

“Sir?”

The time of day had arrived where the restaurant had grown calmer, passed the designated hours that people usually chose to have a meal with the things served at Los Pollos Hermanos.

It sounded like it echoed when the knuckles of your dominant hand knocked on the door in front of you a good few times. “Gus, It's Y/n.”

There was a beat of silence. The cause of which unclear due to the wood blocking your vision, but it was something that created an urge to fidget as you flexed your fingers.

And then you heard the muffled sound.

“Come in.”

Now, any other person who had to do this probably would have walked in already without knocking. Most of the guys on your side of the business had attitude problems, that whole thing where they thought of themselves as higher than each other.

In turn, it usually meant that a lot of people would just do things without proper thought.

But not you.

It's wasn't like you were scared of Gustavo. At this point you had known him and worked alongside him for so long that it was honestly difficult to remember when it had started.

However, when the door in front of you slowly swung inwards, revealing the office that always seemed to be engulfed in dark lighting, a ball of nerves gathered at the bottom of your stomach.

Your posture straightened, attempting to present yourself as stoic as possible when you finally took a step in.

Here we go.

The door latched behind you after a few more slow and careful steps further into the room. And then you halted, looking down at the man who was staring right back at you.

Regardless of the fact that he was simply sat in a chair, the way he held himself always brought a feeling like you were about to start sweating. He was unmoving, the breaths he took not appearing to expand or deflated his chest.

Gustavo didn't even twitch. And neither did his eyes.

This time, when the air passed into his lungs, you could hear the whistle from his nose. “I'm listening.”

Every joint in your body felt as if it stiffened the longer he held your gaze. It was like he could see into your soul and, from his tone, your mind as well. “We believe that one of the has been stolen.”

It felt like you were stood in the centre of a stage. As if the words said had just echoed around a grand hall and you now awaited some kind of response from an audience. Either overlapping boos or shocked gasps.

Gustavo merely raised his chin, “And how do you know this?”

“The truck didn't arrive when it was supposed to.” You swallowed, “We asked the men at the previous checkpoints and it appears that it had missed quite a few before that as well.”

It was probably the need to deliver bad news that had your body feeling as stiff as a board, so, when you finally allowed yourself to take a proper breath, your shoulders lowered with it, “We're not sure who did it.”

Now, since the moment the door had opened, was the first time that Gustavo looked away. His gaze dropped, lowering to a neat pile of papers you guessed he had been going through before your appearance.

Was he mad that you interrupted? Processing the news? Thinking of what to do?

When Gustavo started to lean back it had your eyebrows itching to furrow.

It was a slow movement that shifted almost every part of his body, except his hands that remained in the same position on the desk no matter how stretched his arms became, until his back fully pressed into the chair. And then he met your eyes again.

This time it had you gulping.

“May I ask why you've come all the way out here to tell me information that could've been passed over the phone?”

You blinked for a second, waiting for the words to process even though they already had. Your head slightly tilted, “Pardon?”

“You have just told me that one of my trucks has been intercepted,” Gustavo rephrased, pronouncing his words a little slower as if he needed to speak more clearly, “And Instead of trying to find it. You are here. In my restaurant.”

Whenever it was time to tell someone bad news, there was always an ability to get consumed in the what ifs. There was no way to accurately guess how a person was going to react to something, especially when it came to Gustavo.

But this hadn't been one of the possibilities you imagined.

Your eyebrows officially furrowed, “Sir, we already have men on the job-- I came here to collect Victor and Tyrus, and I just thought it would be good to inform you--”

“Do you have a last known location?”

His tone had switched again, his words fast in a way that said enough. He was looking at you expectantly, the expression on his face making it clear that his patience was being tested.

“Um...” You just blinked for a moment again, jarred by the sudden change in topic, “Yes... Yes, we do, but I'm afraid it's from a long time ago.”

Within about five seconds, Gustavo rid his hands from their overlapped position. He slid them towards himself across the smooth surface and, when they got to the edge of a table, he pushed.

His chair rolled for about a second, the wheels squeaking being the only sound throughout the room, until he could stand on his feet, “Great.”

Gustavo grabbed one of the armrests, stopping the big chair from smacking into the corner of the table for the printer and moved it to the side so that he had space.

Above the printing machine was the only window in the office. The bottom portion of it was the vent system as the creation for viewing the outside world was just for that. It wasn’t openable.

And though the blinds were mostly drawn, the slats so close to turning to their full extent, you could just see a sliver of the outside world. Gustavo turned towards it, his stiff hands slowly clasping behind his back.

There was some accompanying noise, like the muffled sound of cars outside, chatter from the dinning area in the restaurant, the blow of air that almost brought goose bumps to your skin.

But the silence was what you could hear the most.

You cleared your throat, attempting to do it in a way that wasn't to loud. Now you understood why Mike didn't want to interact with Gustavo when he was angry.

I mean, you could understand his frustration. It wasn't like you were happy with having a truck go missing yourself, or that you wanted to say something that could make Gustavo upset.

However, this was a reaction you didn't properly know how to respond to. And that meant that it could escalate within a breath.

“My intention wasn't to... disturb your peace,” you began, trying to word your sentences as carefully as you could, “Is there a particular way you would like this to be handled?”

Once again the man remained still. The wind was coming from right in front of him and yet his body didn't even sway. He was just staring out of the window. “Isn't that for you to judge?”

His voice was flat this time, like he wasn't even paying attention to the words he was saying.

The ability to stomach his attitude was getting a little harder with every statement Gustavo made, but you remained calm. It was better to get this all over and done with than to argue like a game of ping pong. “I could make a judgement, yes, but it isn't my truck.”

“We also don't have that much information on the whereabouts, so--”

“Well, did the truck just disappear? Into thin air?” By the time you had blinked he was facing you once again, his expression matching the way his words snapped throughout the room.

You tried to hide the shock from your face, but in doing so your confusion seemed to take over instead, “No... But, Gustavo, we don't know where it went since it's last destination--”

“Then follow the tracks.”

You leaned back within a second of the sentence catching your ears. Your eyes crinkled, lips curling upwards at the joke... But Gustavo’s expression remained the same.

He was being serious.

“You can't...” Your head slowly rose, your brows remained furrowed while every other feature had dropped, “Sir, with all do respect, that could take hours. The truck would have already reached wherever those people wanted to take it.”

“And not to mention that wind-- The sand has probably shifted by now.”

The more you spoke, the more you realised that you could say anything and it wouldn't change the way his mind was working right now. He was frustrated, the tension visible in the way his muscles sat.

Gustavo wasn't going to listen.

“Then I suggest you start making progress.”

Unbelievable. His tone, the look on his face, the request-- No, the command. It was unbelievable.

Of course, you could understand where he was coming from. You knew what was being transported in those trucks, and you knew what could happen if other business found out how easy it was to take Gustavo Fring's stock.

He had every right to worry about the situation, though he seemed to be too stuck in the possibilities of what could happen.

It was strange to see him like this. You were expecting to see the intimidation tactic you had seen him use more times than you've seen him smile, fuelled by anger which was very common in this line of work.

But as he stood in front of you, the way his body presented itself, the way his face remained in the same expression like he was trying to stop something from appearing. You could see it in his eyes.

Right now, he wasn't angry, he was... scared?

Gustavo Fring was scared.

“What if he don't find it?” you finally spoke up. If he was going to make you do this, he would need to think about all the other possibilities and consequences, “What if we send people out in that desert searching for hours, but the only thing we get is heatstroke and sunburns? Hmm?”

His eyelids lowered enough that it hadn't really narrowed his gaze, but the movement was visible. The lines closest to his mouth had deepened and you swore the side of his nose had twitched in way that made it look almost like a snarl. “That truck holds a shipment of something that has any person of the law waiting to strike.”

“If they found it, if the people that took my truck let others know that they have taken my truck... What could happen is endless.”

A sigh huffed through your nose as you looked back at him. This was pointless. The decision to talk to him was pointless.

Maybe he's had a bad day, maybe being the owner of a business like his had gotten too much this morning and then you just decided to come in later in the day and add onto that.

But now you couldn't just back off. You couldn't apologise, leave and pretend this never happened. You were too far in.

Gustavo was staring right at you. He was stood in place, the breaths that he took now visible in his chest as the emotions started to attack his facial features.

It was like a standoff. A fight just because two people had an understanding of a situation with different perceptions.

Who would've thought.

“I get that... I do, okay-- Just... Look, we have no idea who is behind this, Gus. ” you started up, wanting to fully collected your words before attempting to speak, and Gustavo's head slightly lowered at the phrase, “We don't know if those people are waiting for us to act, and if they are, then we could start something far worse.”

“What we need is more time--”

Out of nowhere, all at once, was this sound that purely rippled through the air as if it was played through a multitude of speakers.

It was something that felt like it had engulfed the room longer that it had rung out. Something that had then been followed by a set of words that you were guessing came from Gustavo. But you couldn't hear it.

You couldn't hear.

It was only when you tried to look for the source of sudden panic that you notice that you couldn't properly see either... And that's when you realised.

Your arms were up, your hands held in a way almost lined perfectly with your eyes. Your palms were open, but your fingers were ready to curl as if they needed to ball into a fist.

They were twitching, doing so with every second that went by until your brain clocked onto the fact that they weren't in fact twitching.

They were shaking.

The movement was almost staggered when your arms finally attempted to lower, and soon you could see over your limbs. Right as Gustavo's hand had removed itself from the desk.

This silence was different.

Your eyes were wide, your heart on a rampage within your chest, by the time your arms stilled at your sides. And despite the movement of Gustavo’s arm, he was frozen as well.

It replayed over and over in your head. The moments prior, the words said, the second you saw something erupt within his eyes. The attention that you had on him seemed to end with your mind missing his movements.

He had slammed his hand on the desk.

His anger had gotten the best of him so much so that it overrode his usual ability to maintain a calm exterior, and though Gustavo still resided behind his desk, you were now stood closer to the door than him.

No words could find themselves flowing through the air. Every attempt Gustavo made, every twitch of his mouth, ended with the same silence.

The two of you could stand in the same opposing position for hours and still no words would be shared.

You had been doing so well.

After however long it felt, the ability to feel began to return throughout your body, and soon your shoulders deflated once again. Like the stance you held upon entering this room, your spine was straightened as much as it could. Your chin rose, expression devoid of any emotion.

Until you smiled.

It was small. Weary, though held in a way to show otherwise. “You're right, Sir.” No matter how many times you swallowed, the lump formed in your throat never ceased, “I'll-- I'll get right to it. Sorry, for the... inconvenience.”

And then you turned, your body stiff enough that you had to actually force it to carry out any sort of movement. You could feel it regardless of the way your muscles shifted.

By the time you next blinked the door in front of you was open once again, allowing the cool air in the hallway to meet with your skin, that you didn’t even realise was as warm as it was.

You began to walk through.

Gustavo's mind was screaming at him to move his legs, to walk round that damn desk and close that door before you could... But what would he even say?

What could he do that hadn’t already been done?

His actions had caused this. His inability, for once, to not control himself ended with you... you thinking that he was going to harm you? Hurt you?

He didn't move. There was a spasm of a muscle throughout multiple parts of his body, but it wasn't enough to set him off. Gustavo remained where he stood, watching as the door to his office slowly closed so that it wouldn't make sound.

“Oh, come on.”

Nothing.

There was still no sign of that truck. It had been hours since you were first informed of the news and yet there had been barely any progress, no step closer to finding it.

Sure, a multitude of people had been out, wondrously travelling back and forth across the same dirt and sandy road. But it's not like you could follow tracks when you got to the tarmac.

So, you were lost. Unsure of what to do next.

You leaned forward in the chair beneath you, waiting until your elbows could land on the table to stop.

A sigh seeped from your mouth, your hands raising to your face. Your fingers pressed into the sides of your nose, almost touching the corner of your eyes that had been closed.

The room was well ventilated. Cool air flowed around often enough that it could be felt, but it also seemed like the hotness of most places of America was a tough battle to defeat.

Your skin felt clammy despite being indoors, out of direct sunlight. But whenever it got to the point where it was too much, the cold air would complete it's cycle. Meeting with your body once again, though it apparently couldn’t ease the warmth of your face.

When another breath was sucked into your lungs, your hands slid from their previous position. They glided to the top of your head, smoothing out the hair beneath, and then followed the back of your skull until they reached the nape of your neck.

Your head sunk a little the moment your fingers began to press down, letting your eyes fall closed all over again.

This was supposed to be your job, something that you were supposed to be good at.

I mean, sure, this wasn't the exact reason that you were hired, but surely you were expected to be able to handle something like this? You should be able to handle something like this.

Yet here you were, sulking in the meeting room of the poultry farm while your team tried and failed again, and again, to find that damn truck.

At this point, you didn't even care to find it because of what was in it, what could happen if some officer stumbled upon the hidden compartments. All you cared about was Gustavo.

If it got to the 24 hour mark, he wasn't exactly going to be happy about it. I mean, he wasn't before when he...

But this was your fault. You were the person that dedicated more time talking to him when the truck was first lost, and maybe that was what made this whole thing worse.

You lost the truck and made Gustavo mad.

Your body was about to give into the urge to slump forward, wanting to lay against the table in a way that might grant the ability to sink through it and the ground beneath it.

But then the door to the room unlatched.

Instead of carrying out any of the wanted movements, you stilled, an attempt to gage any other sounds that may follow more clearly. Though, it proved to be a bit difficult when your ears caught onto a set of footsteps.

Finally, your head rose, the bones of your elbows beginning to ache due to the amount of time they remained on the table.

Your eyes were almost lazy when they opened once again. You were expecting to see Mike, or other members of your team so that they deliver some other form of bad news. You did not prepare for anyone else.

It took a moment for your vision to focus on the new figure. They had taken a few more steps before they remained in place, even clearing their throat.

Truth be told, your eyes didn't even need to rid themselves of the blurriness to catch onto who it was.

You could recognise that stance from miles away.

In about a second, all the tiredness seemed to drain from wherever it clung both inside and outside of your body. The features on your face relaxed but your eyes grew wide instead.

You jolted up from the chair you sat on enough so that the back of your knees bumped into it. The legs squealed in an echo as they scraped backwards against the floor, “Sir.”

“Sir, what-- What are you doing here?”

Like before, when the door shut, the surrounding room was engulfed by a silence that was hard to ignore.

Now, the two of you were stood on opposite sides. You were the one behind the desk while Gustavo was the one waiting to speak.

Despite how you imagined the man presenting himself at this hour, he wasn't in one of those fancy suits that always looked like they were freshly bought even if he had them for a long time. He was still in his uniform. Like he had come straight from Los Pollos Hermanos... But he never did that.

Gustavo always changed first.

“What am I doing in my own factory?” The tension wasn't in his face anymore. It had dissipated, leaving behind a much lighter look that settled across his skin and within his eyes.

He even had the slightest smile worn on his lips but it was hard to tell if it was genuine or the one he usually used to hide.

You cleared your throat, the amount of blinks your eyelids allowed increasing as you processed your past phrasing, “I meant... I mean, I thought you needed to be at the restaurant?”

“All that is awaiting me now is more paperwork.” Gustavo insistedsimply, even sounding as if he was about to chuckle through his words, “You don't have to worry about...”

In real time it only happened for about a second, but Gustavo suddenly sort of froze. His lips were parted, the words still urging to roll of his tongue while the skin under his eyes crinkled.

And then his face dropped. It was a subtle movement, one that you had almost missed if it wasn't for the way his gaze narrowed almost immediately after.

That feeling came back again. Being centre on a stage with all the lights shining right on you. Only this time there was no tension, there was no fear created by the attention being put onto you.

Just general confusion.

“Sir?”

The man before you merely hummed to acknowledge your voice, the expression on his face remaining as he started to move forwards.

He was analysing you, taking slow steps closer to the opposite side of the table as if you were about to take off running if he did it any other way. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

Gustavo stilled himself right behind the back of the chair on his side. His posture was the same as it always was, straight as a ruler, though his shoulder looked a little lower than usual. His chin slightly raised.

He could see it. He could see the sort of dullness to your eyes that seemed to have increased the more the day had drained you of life.

He took in your stance, the rigidness clear within your arms that were held by your sides and sometimes even twitched in a way that made it clear that they wanted to drop down, hang loosely in the air.

Usually the lines of your face weren't visible to the naked eye like Gustavo's were. When you would smile, make a face in response to something, it would bring them out, show them off to whoever was looking for about a second until you needed to focus again.

But there they were, carved beneath your eyes in a way that made the skin almost look like someone had pulled on it for hours.

You looked as if you shouldn't have been able to stand without swaying but there you stood, determined to act any other way than you had earlier.

“Sit down.” It took a minute for even Gustavo to realise the words had left his mouth.

You blinked, the previous reluctance to move further stilling your body regardless of the command. Thus, when you still made no sign of compliance to his words, he even gestured to what you had previously been seated in for further insistence.

“But...” It felt like it took hours for your lips to move for a singular word. It was the most confusing feeling too because you had worked so many shifts like this, so what was the difference? Why were you reacting the way that you were?

You swallowed down the lump in your throat, even if it was going to return either way, your stiff arms now allowing movement as you clasped your hands together in front of you. “I-- I shouldn't have been sitting in first place, Sir.”

Your eyes weren't on his anymore. Your gaze was sort of mindlessly flickering about as it succumbed to many thoughts that swirled through your head, “I didn't-- I didn't mean to sit in your seat.”

“My seat?” The skin between Gustavo’s eyebrows crinkled. He wasn't angry, or looking at you like you had done the worst thing in the world. It was genuine confusion, “Y/n, that is a plastic, foldable chair.”

“It is not mine, or anyone else's-- It is an object with a purpose that I would hope that you're familiar with.”

He was trying to not be direct this time. The command of telling someone to sit down felt harsh, forceful. He had already been both of those things today.

When there was still no movement, his jaw clenched. There was a quiet breath that seeped through his nose, the cold air almost making it feel like he inhaled water, until he blew it back out.

“Please.”

Maybe it was the difference in attitude that made it hard for you to choose the proper reaction. Earlier he had looked at you with such hatred that even though you weren't the direct cause or reason for it, it still affected you.

But now his gaze was light. It held remnants of the tiredness he always felt after a shift, though he would never tell. You could see the mixture of emotions that stormed as the release from work allowed a genuineness that he couldn't always feel. That he didn't always want.

He wasn't commanding something this time. He was asking.

After another breath filtered through your system, your body finally made the choice to move. You took a step to the side, hearing the way the floorboards creaked beneath your feet. And then you took a seat.

The slight relief was visible within Gustavo's face as you brought the chair a little closer to the table. But like it always did, the look disappeared within a second.

“Now,” By the next time you blinked, resuming your position from earlier, Gustavo had began to walk along the length of the table, “I'm guessing you found Victor and Tyrus?”

Your eyes were on him not matter how fast or slow he decided to move, “Uh, yeah-- Yes, I did.” You watched him move round the edge of the table, aiming towards a set of four cabinets that sat against the wall. Each both a different colour and height, though not by much.

“We followed the tracks as far as we could-- As far as they went.” you insisted, taking a moment to lean your elbow against the table again while Gustavo moved towards a certain cabinet.

“They went onto the main road.” the man concluded as his feet finally stopped. You could hear a slight breath huff out of his lips, his head even tilting a bit before it went right back.

Just in the way it had earlier, the ability to part your lips had become a sort of struggle.

He hadn't shown an ounce of hostility, and even now, as he stood with his back towards you, it should allow you some feeling to be able to speak your mind. But that cautious feeling reappeared like you were dealing with a wild animal.

“Yes.” you finally confirmed regardless of the fact that it felt like your voice was caught in your throat. It was a wonder that the words even left your mouth, “I'm sorry, Sir.”

In about a second, Gustavo had turned his attention from what it was previous on. He looked over his shoulder, most of his body still facing the cabinets, until his eyes met your own. “No need to apologise, Y/n.”

“You weren't driving the one driving the truck.” That was it. The was his only other comment in response to yet another one of your failures before he turned right back to the wall.

“What about Mike?”

Your eyebrows furrowed, your back leaning further into the chair while your gaze remained on whatever he was doing, “Mike? Um... He was the one to figure out which ways the truck turned.”

Gustavo reached for the top of the cabinet farthest to the left. It was a sort of greyish green, contrasting with the carpet and the particular wood the walls were made of.

There was this white fan that sat atop the set of drawers. It was an item that you honestly hadn't realised was there until now, even if it was one of the main reason that the heat hadn't completely consumed you.

Gustavo's hand moved along the long neck of the object and soon it arrived at the front grill. Though, when he began to shift it, moving it to face more to the right, your train of thought sort of slipped.

“Oh-- Actually I forgot to... tell you, but Mike managed to find an angle from some of our cameras where you could see the number plate.”

Gustavo lowered his arm back down, seeming to get lost in the spinning blades as he just seemed to stand there for a moment, “He found it?”

Your excitement fizzled out almost as fast as it had appeared. Alas, when you thought a piece of information was usual, in reality, you were a step further back than you were before.

Still so far from solving the problem.

“The truck was very fast.” you informed and that seemed to jump start Gustavo's brain again as he turned away from the cabinet with a slight hum.

“It would disappear by the time you blinked... Too blurry every time we tried to pause it.” He started walking again, following the wall that was now to his right until he got to a table closest to the corner.

This time Gustavo didn't respond as he stopped himself once again. Instead he reached for the divided tray, that was always brought to this room for Mr. Fring himself, the cling film over it crackling when his fingers touched down.

You should’ve known he was coming.

“But he's-- He's working with a few of the guys right now. Trying to see if they can fix it up enough to get a match.”

Once the plastic was peeled back, Gustavo took the tray into one of his hands and lifted it from the surface below before twisting back round. “Good... Good.” he remarked in a way that had your eyebrows yearning to furrow, but your mind lost focus when he chose to walk behind you.

Your body stilled, waiting for him to appear in your peripheral vision once again. But even when he did, your muscles never managed to ease the built tension.

“And what about you?”

Before your eyes could snap towards what could be seen of him, his arm suddenly reached to the side as he rounded table corner closest to where you sat. And now, for whatever reason, the tray that he took was placed right in front of you.

“What about me?” you questioned a little lazily as your mind zoned in on the new presence. There was a different vegetable in each section, cut up smaller than they actually would be so that they would fit. And also because it looked nicer.

“What are you doing?” The clarification allowed your attention to shift and this time, when you got yourself to look up, you found Gustavo stood to the side of table.

The question had you just staring at him for a moment. If he had asked this earlier, your heart would have been pounding in a way that felt like it would come up your throat.

But his tone was normal. One that held nothing but genuineness that conveyed curiosity. Not anger, or burning hatred. He just wanted to know.

Either way, you will admit that it had you almost gulping when you realised it in fact looked like you hadn't been doing anything when Gustavo first walked in.

So, you cleared your throat, “Well, I... I didn't want to stand around while Mike and the other guys did their thing, and Victor took Tyrus with him to gather more information, so.. I decided to wait here at a local point so that people could easily keep me updated.”

On the table, in front of where Gustavo stood, sat two metallic bottles.

“Makes it easier for me to pass it on too.”

The one to the left helped the water within maintain it's heat if it wanted to accompany a tea bag, or keep a coffee hot. You could even put a hot chocolate in their if wanted.

And the other, the one Gustavo had took in a hand, kept the water cool. Useful for days like these, as if you left the water out on the table you could half expect it to start bubbling. “Hmm...”

“Good system.” He reached for the set of tall glasses that sat in front of the bottles. It slid against the uneven surface of the table, slightly managing to scuff up the wood, until it was close enough to Gustavo.

The thumb of his other hand pressed into what you were guessing was a button close to the neck, and soon, the lid clicked, snapping open. All Gustavo had to do was tilt his wrist and then the stream of water began to spill into the glass below. “Any word from... local businesses.”

It was piecing together. A lot of things were. The longer your eyes trained on watching the glass get fuller and fuller, the more points began connecting in your head.

“No.” You blinked, trying to bring back a sense of reality as you attempted to swallow the sudden feeling of thirst. “Noone wants to make any moves.”

There was something going on here. Something Gustavo was doingsince he entered the room.

If he needed something he would have already asked. He would have immediately sat right down in the chair opposite you and said whatever he needed to say.

But he wanted something.

“I heard that were even hesitant about...” Something that he apparently couldn't get with ease as you watched that glass begin to get dragged in your direction. “About?” Gustavo questioned, his arm slowly extending the further he pushed.

“About...” you repeated, the next few words proving difficult to locate through your mind, “About conducting meetings--”

In a split second, before you could even process it yourself, your elbow rolled until your forearm met with the wooden surface. Your hand barely had to reach out, as within about a second, it was pressing into the oncoming glass, halting it before it could fully get to your side of the table.

“Okay, what is this?”

Gustavo's head snapped in your direction, eyes aimed on your hand that trapped his own against the glass for a good few seconds before his gaze flickered to yours, “I'm trying to give you water.”

“No, not--” you huffed out a breath, fighting the urge to shake your head, as you freed both yours and Gustavo's hand from the grip. “All of this. The-- The pouring me a glass of water, which I can easily do myself. The turning the fan in my direction, even though I made no remarks of wanting that.”

“And this.” You grabbed the tray in front of you, the cling film sticking to your fingers as it still hung on the side, and held it up between the two of you. Your eyebrows were completely furrowed now, “Why did you give me this?”

“There has been no one else who was allowed to even put a hand near it, let alone eat it for themselves,” Gustavo's eyes were practically the only part of his body that moved as the travelled to what you held. “So, now I am asking you.”

“What are you doing?”

That silence was back again, layering across every surface that it could in a way that even made the fan sound loud, while the two of you stared back at each other.

The next breath that he took was heard by your ears. Finally, he removed his hand from the glass, that had begun to feel like it was freezing his skin, letting it remain where it was placed on the table.

His footsteps echoed once again as he begun to slowly move along the side of the table, rounding the next corner so that he could do the same on the next side.

It felt like your heart was in your throat by the time Gustavo had reached the chair opposite you. Even more so when he pulled it from its tucked position.

When the chair was a good distance a way from the table, he sat down, his back straightening in a way it usually did. Which you could never managed to do yourself.

He leant his forearms down onto the table top, his palms flattening against it while the fingers on each hand overlapped, resuming the familiar position that made it seem like you were back in the Los Pollos Hermanos office.

But you weren't.

This was the factory. A place settled far within the middle of no where to the point that you couldn't hear those cars anymore. You couldn't hear the chatter of customers, or the people working away in the kitchen.

The only thing that met your ears were your own breaths. And Gustavo's which were steady, though the look in his eyes told you something different.

“There are... a lot of things that need to be said...” He was almost nervous, the fingers pressed onto each other begging to twitch the longer your gaze stayed on him, “And yet, I forget that a voice is needed for that.”

For once, Gustavo didn't care how he felt. He didn't care about the argument, or that damn truck, even if it still made him anxious to think about what could happen.

But even then, the consequences wouldn't just effect him. They would damage his employees for both this business and the restaurant, which could then extend to their families, and that meant that it would end up at your feet.

This situation wasn't just about him.

It was about you.

“Y/n, I don't want to make you uncomfortable by sitting here, and talking at you about... what happened.” There was no name for that moment. No word to accurately convey the events, how it made either of you feel.

Still, it was like your body wanted to shy away from the singular mention of it.

“But, I can't ignore it.”

You wanted to get up. Wanted to move through the room as fast as you could and just bolt out that door, “Sir, we have more important things to talk about--”

“No.” His voice was louder than before. It wasn't enough to echo, or make you almost jump out of your skin, but it was a sound that had your mouth snapping shut. “No, we do not.”

It was like he was staring into your soul. As if he could read every thought the was in your mind, even if it was only there for a second.

It was like he was staring into your soul. As if he could read every thought that so much as passed through your mind, even just for a second.

“A truck is a truck. You are a person, living and breathing.” Gustavo continued, this unwavering insistence held within each word, “A person who, even after... wrongful treatment, stayed working hours on end for my benefit.”

Your head was shaking before the sentence had finished, “You didn't... Sir, this is my job.” No matter the difference in conversation topics, or the change of reasoning, your eyebrows always remained furrowed.

“Sure. Your job is whatever I say it should be,” Gustavo began, the slightest shrug shifting his shoulders, “But do you know how many people would have quit if I told them to do what you did?”

The nerves within your system had fizzled out at this point. “So what? Were you trying to to test me?” The only thing rampant through your veins was the exhaustion. A feeling that would soon lead to frustration, “Trying to find a weak spot to see if you needed to let me go?”

“No, I'm trying to say that there is no one else here like you.”

Your back pressed further into the chair you sat on, the upper half of your body almost slumping with it, “Mike could easily do what I did today.”

“Maybe so,” Gustavo did the opposite, he leaned forwards. And this time when he spoke, his voice was filled with this simplicity that it almost annoyed you, “But doing it without complaining? No... No, I do not think so.”

“Gustavo,” One of your hands raised to your face, while your head shook, in a way that sort of squashed your nose.

Your fingers rubbed at the muscles, trying to ease the tension that had begun to ache, and then your hand lowered so that you could look at the man across the table once again. “Are you going to give me a medal? A gold star? I was just doing my job--”

“And I am just trying to-” Gustavo caught himself. He let his lips fall closed, and so did his eyes while a breathing sucked through his nostrils. Though, when the breath cycled back out, they opened like before.

“This morning. What I asked... What I forced you to do-- The way that I spoke.” Gustavo's brows lightly crinkled. There was this look on his face while his head lightly shook, like he could see the past events right in front of him, “It was completely unacceptable.”

“I am... very sorry for what I caused.”

Your hands lay still in your lap, your fingers gripped onto the edges of your shirt as you stared back at Gustavo. “You didn't...” you started, almost forgetting that you could speak in a way that made you pause for a moment, “You didn't do anything.”

Gustavo nodded his head without a second to waste. “I did.”

The expression on his face remained regardless of how much time passed. His gaze flickered, his iris jumping from side to side, up and down, as if he was scanning every feature he could see. “I don't... I don't know what has happened in your life. And I don't need you to tell me.”

“But I know what I saw.”

You wanted to look away. Wanted to look down at the surface of the table below and let your mind zone in on the discolouration of the wood, or the difference in texture.

But you couldn't. You couldn’t move your eyes away from his face, the look on it that was such a thing that you had never seen it before. At least not on Gustavo.

“What I am trying to say-- What...” He took in a deep breath, attempting to unscramble the words in his head. And for the first time, you recognised the look of tiredness that washed of his features.

Or maybe it had been there all along.

“There is only one thing I want from you. One thing that I want to ask.” he finally managed out, and though their was clear frustration over the struggle, he spoke in such a careful way. Correcting himself of his past mistake.

“Okay.” Your voice was just above a whisper. In all honesty, it didn't feel like the sound was going to get passed your throat. But it did. And now, there was this look of relief that almost cleared the lines of Gustavo's face.

His back straightened, something you didn't even notice that he had to do.

“Will you work for me?”

Your eyebrows furrowed like they had many times before. Your head slightly tilted to the side, lips about to part in a way that Gustavo seemed to predict. “Not for the business. Or the company-- Not for any other person...”

“Just me.”

It felt like one of those jokes that took too long to understand. A phrasing of words that everybody else could get within a second. But not you. The most you could do was stare back at him. “What for?”

“Whatever you would like, I just-- Today made me realise a lot of things.” Gustavo began to lean backwards until his back was pressed against the chair. “I get so caught in what people do, what they say, that I only react for myself.”

“I am controlled by my own wants and needs, but my ability to react, or to feel, has only been allowed because of you.” The way his eyes crinkled, the upturn of a corner of his mouth. He was trying to be serious, but there was something else peeking through. “What you have done for the business, for me, surrounds us everyday, and...”

Suddenly, the expression on his face drained. Whatever sentence was about to roll off of his tongue got put on hold in a way that made you almost want to look around for whatever caused it. But then Gustavo cleared his throat.

He almost looked... shy.

“I... I do realise that the timing of this makes it sound like I'm trying to bribe you.”

It had felt like it had been the longest time since the urge to smile had tugged at your own lips. And at this point it was almost a strange feeling. You shook your head, “No, I get it.”

For the first time in what felt like days, the corners of Gustavo’s lips allowed themselves to curl. He looked down, nodding at your assurance that visibly eased his mind.

Finally, the two of you were on the same page.

“What I know... What I see is that there is a difference in a lot of things when you are in charge.” His voice oozed with a sincerity. It was this genuine and confident sound, like he had seen whatever he was a million times before.

With his next words, when he had mustered up the courage that was usually so easy for him to utilise, his eyes found your own set across the table, “When the mornings comes back, there is want to get through the stages of a day instead of a need to.”

His gaze swirled with an intensity, something that he almost looked confused about, unsure of how to deal with. And either, it was because he had never felt it before, or it had been a very long.

“I want you to work with you by my side.” It was insistent at this point. The way he sounded, the tone he used, the look on his face. Gustavo wasn’t asking anymore. It was a want.

A need.

It clicked. In a second, that very feeling sort of faded after his phrasing settled within his own ears. He was thinking about himself again. Acting based off of what his mind was telling him to do.

So, Gustavo’s back straightened, his head rose high and the expression on his face returned to the usual one he held when needing to deal with business. “If you would want that.”

It didn’t matter how tired you were. It didn’t matter what you had been doing all day, or the way your bones were practically aching by now. In fact, it was like your mind had completely forgotten that there was even a world outside the room you were in.

Right now, you were looking at Gustavo Fring. A man who was feared by many, not just because of his job. A man who was fuelled by the want for revenge, to seek justice for things no matter what extent he had to go to for it.

Yet here he was, sat on the opposite of the table he usually ruled at, naked under your unmoving gaze.

There was no part of you that wanted to leave the room anymore. No part that wanted to succumb nerves that told you to avoid the eye contact, and his presence all together.

When you finally spoke, finding the voice that felt like it was going to falter like a flickering candle, it was the fullest it had been all day, “Yes.”

No fear. No want to run for the hills and never come back. You remained in your seat.

Gustavo fought for control of the muscles beneath his brows as they nagged to pinched together. He was nodding again, fully processing your confirmation in a way that allowed him to properly breath again.

And, for the first time in what felt like months at this point, the two of you were smiling at each other.

After all, it was just a truck.

“I would.”

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