#we love to think about motifs and shit

[cheekedupwhiteboy]

All the Pretty Horses vs Equus

[bacchuschucklefuck]

this has been a roller coaster of a design journey but finally I can present you: class swap artificer!adaine and rogue!fabian

[presiding]

genuinely admire those who were optimistic for dishonored 3 but in this videogame industry climate and [insert a 4hr video essay about arkane's recent history here], honestly, not getting dh3 is good news

[mewtwo24]

So like??? I don't know if I understood this correctly, but the music wwx plays to settle Wen Ning's aggression at the beginning of the first volume is the wangxian song lwj composed and sang/played for him when they were in the cave as kids???

Like. You're telling me that wwx's instinctive focal point of comfort is lwj and lwj was just expected to be normal about all of this.

I'm. rotating this in my head as we speak wwx you're so aksjldfgdhjskjghkfjdh

[art-o-gant]

what the fuck is the janissary motif doing in the new puppetshades. genuinely i. i've not stopped thinking about this. can anybody hear me

[imminent-danger-came]

i loved ur lmk fandomification rant, now i'm curious- who's your favorite (non-monkey!) lmk character (and any insights you want to share with the class? :eyes:)

Mei, Lady Bone Demon, and probably Azure!

But I could go on a long rant about any character in the show tbh, they're all my favorite character with the 3 I listed and MK being my "favorite favorites" (except maybe Jin and Yin, sorry guys. I do like their place as a sense of normalcy for MK, acting as the "monster of the week" antagonists in 4x01).

Little miss "I would watch my sword break 1000 times so long as I used it to protect the ones I care about" is my girly. Watched her best friend die in the A Hero is Born (AHIB) special and held onto that as a grudge all the way until 3x10. She just wants to see everyone make it out alive, but I doubt she's ready to pay the price required for that. No one in this show is. Mei watched Peng run away in 4x14 and wanted to kill that bird with her bear hands. She took everything Subodhi said to her in 4x09 so personally, like Subodhi probably knew she would, which allowed her to build off of MK's plan so they had a chance at succeeding. She's at her god damn limit. Her episodes (1x03, 3x02, & 4x05) are some of my favorites. She drives a motor cycle, she wears lipstick, she's a gamer, she wields a kick-ass sword, she's a dragon. In 3x12 she's willing to sacrifice Wukong for the sake of the world and more specifically MK. "Don't you realize you're hurting the people who care about you the most?" She's "fakin' it until she's makin' it". Literally what more could you ask for in a character.

Then you have LBD, who fights for a perfect world supposedly for mortal souls yet discards people the moment they no longer have a use to her. Ultimately I think she uses destiny as a crutch, as her way to cope with all of the suffering in the world. "I won't let you take my Destiny from me". You wonder how much it was about perfection and how much it was about her ability to change anything in the world she watched play the same tragedy over and over again. For the first 3 seasons she seems to be acting on destiny itself, she's the narrative our protagonists are running from. Then Embrace Your Destiny comes around, and you realize she was just as doomed by the narrative as anyone else. Doomed to a world of pain, unable to fix anything. The "to pain" scene is one of my favorite scenes, just in general. "Do you really still think the universe wants anything, from any of us?" "Don't you?" LBD and MK's foil is so fucking good. A delightful antagonist who they justify but don't victimize. Killed Spider Queen on screen. What more can I say.

Now Azure. Sweet Sweet Azure. The tragedy of Unckie Lion. Sincerely wanted to make the world a better place and was willing to sacrifice anything for it, just like LBD. I think about his scene with the Jade Emperor at least once a week. "How is it you come to stand before me today Azure, was there a point where you questioned it, or where you too oblivious in your own delusion to realize you were a mere piece in somebody else's game." Fucking insane. His abandonment issues are off the charts. He was gay for Wukong. He thought he could fix the world, and instead barely left it unbroken. He died with the power he couldn't use to change anything. He let himself become a pawn (continuing LMK's habit of manipulating royalty) thinking he could somehow avoid his fate. But the only way to win was to stop playing, and at every opportunity he had to stop he kept pushing. Moving forward. Just like LBD he was coping with the suffering of the world in his own way. It didn't work. Does it ever? Maybe MK will figure it out, maybe he'll leave the world better than he found it, but it's looking bleak. The 3 way foil between LBD, MK, and Azure haunts me.

And then maybe you realize every character in this show is just trying to cope with the world in their own way, and you stare at a wall for 3 hours about it.

Overall I think this image encapsulates it best:

[cepheusgalaxy]

ughhhhhhhhhhh why am i so prone to complaining

[twilightarcade]

man looking for books makes me feel like an absolute idiot. Yeah I like everything but the stuff I don't like. Hope that helps

[vulpinesaint]

in my "it is rotten work" era actually. especially to me. especially if it's you.

[kociamieta]

Out of the scale of 1 to 10 which version/interpretations of angels look horrifying or majestic?

1. Bayonetta Angels

2. Evangelion Angels

3. Diablo Angels

4. Legion Angels

5. Classic Bible Accurate Angels

6. Angelerium Angels

8. DOOM angels

7. Ultrakill Angels

8. The Woodsprite and Death from Guillermo Del Toro's Pinnochio

9. Dark Souls Angels

10. Shin Megamei Tensei Angels

anon i'm afraid i'm unfamiliar with like, 70% of these. so i can't "rate" them other than based on their looks. instead of a scale of 1 to 10 you're getting my thoughts on their designs as i am notoriously bad at Ranking Things. and some babbling overall. enjoy

starting off with Bayonetta angels. Holy shit. the range.... monster-looking ones? humanoids? ships??? cars????? the flesh inside those gold and marble shells??? love them, quite horrifying and majestic at once.

Evangelion! cool stuff. always love some strange organic shapes for angels, and the very geometric ones are pretty interesting as well

Diablo. i like the tendril-like wings. the lack of a visible face is pretty cool as well..

i... i'm assuming you're talking about the 2010 movie "Legion". no comment on this one.

i'm not really sure what "Classic Bible Accurate Angels" would entail. if you're pedantic enough, you can argue that the cherubim and ophanim in Ezekiel's vision aren't exactly "angels" in the literal sense of the word. malakim/messengers/angels could appear as pretty much human. either way, the celestial being category is quite fascinating

my jaw dropped when i saw the Angelarium website. the designs?? the drawings themselves???? the writing as well. obsessed with this???? hello....... Definitely quite majestic

DOOM. huh. that's a pretty interesting looking alien behind that armor. i'm assuming the angel comparison works in the game's context

ULTRAKILL! yay! Gabriel and the Council's armor are pretty cool, and i like the virtues too (their concept art is so good!!!). hope we get to see more angels in the future.

ahhhhg they're both so cool. love how Death is a sphynx. i can't tell if they're exactly supposed to be angels (saw the Woodsprite called a "fairy" somewhere?), but the motifs are so good regardless

Dark Souls. ojh wow. i think these are the most disturbing on this list, i love them. taking organic shapes to another level.... they remind me of mycelia.... huge win for horrifying angel nation

i wasn't really sure what to focus on with Shin Megami Tensei. the angel enemy itself (poor thing went through a lot, design wise)? the divine demon class as a whole (a... lot of characters to look at)? so i went with the archangels. their SMT IV versions are great, the ornate and quite organic-looking shapes put them on the majestic end of the spectrum for me

[a-star-that-burns-brightly]

So uh. Maybe I'm just really stupid, but despite being in this fandom for a year now I for some reason was convinced that Killcheroy killing herself was like, canon, because of how widely accepted that theory is in the fandom and spoken of as if it's fact. But after looking through all of Fuuta's stuff again (voice dramas, music videos, the like,) I've come to realize that not only is Killcheroy's actual cause of death never actually confirmed, but I've also realized something else: Y'all I really do not think this girl killed herself lmao. In fact, I am very confident that she didn't kill herself, mainly due to the fact that, as we know, Milgram has a very specific motif when it comes to characters who have committed suicide or have themes of suicide in their character

Mahiru and Kazui's victims both have a shoe off, because both of them died via suicide

Muu is often presented with only one shoe, because she is implied to be suicidal

Fuuta's victim also has a shoe off, because as we know she died of-- ...Huh? Oh shit. Both shoes are intact. Now I've seen people, though often briefly, point that out before What I don't see pointed out however is that Backdraft has three perfect opportunities to follow up on the shoes motif, and just doesn't.

These are the first two I wanna talk about. Killcheroy's shoes are perfectly in view, yet both of them are still in tact. Since this whole scene is basically a creative reenactment of Killcheroy's death, wouldn't it make sense for one shoe to be off if suicide was what took her out? But at the same time, these scenes are still depicting her when she is 'alive,' so maybe it wouldn't make that much sense for a shoe to be off in this particular scene. But what about after she burns up? That's where the third scene comes in

Even after she dies, her shoes are not there. Milgram is a series that loves including small, blink-and-you'll-miss-it details. If Killcheroy really killed herself, there's no way her shoes wouldn't be visible in these shots as Fuuta's running away, right? And this shoe motif, coupled with the fact that when looking at what we have, there's no actual evidence that Killcheroy killed herself (to my knowledge) makes me doubt this theory a lot more than I had when I originally assumed it was canon. So what do I think took Killcheroy out? Well, though we have no evidence that she killed herself, we do have evidence that Fuuta doxxed her.

(x) Storm Pazuzu Should we destroy her?＾＾Just because you’re a middle school girl doesn’t mean you can act like this lmaooooo don’t go easy on her just because she’s cute  QRT Miss Magic I got permission from the store owner, it’s allowed as long as I’m only replicating it for personal use. Storm Pazuzu Yeah, yeah, thanks for the late excuses QRT Storm Pazuzu I think I’ve got all her details now. Based on her previous tweets I’ve worked out her school. The fact she lives so close is hilarious lol Judgement☨Onizuka You’re the worst offender of all

And the fact that this scene transitions

to this one, where Fuuta is reacting to the news of Killcheroy's death, leads me to believe that this doxxing was the final bridge that caused Killcheroy's death. Now, a lot of life-threatening events can result from doxxing, for a while I was even pondering the possibility that Killcheroy was swatted and killed that way. But I think someone in Fuuta's group killed her, because the text in the MV makes it a note to specify that Killcheroy "lives close" to Fuuta and presumably the rest of his friend group since they all go to the same university and live in the same area. I can see people arguing that that would remove a bit of Fuuta's agency and responsibility from his murder, but I don't think I would agree with that. Regardless of what truly happened to Killcheroy after the doxxing, whether she was killed by someone in the group, or swatted (which I think is less likely, but is still a possibility), this presumed culprit was only able to do the things they did because Fuuta gave them the tools to. He gave them a target, Killcheroy, who he demonized and dehumanized into the role of Petulant Witch, and enough details of her location for anyone in the area to find her and enact punishment in the most direct way they can. Fuuta's story, to me anyway, isn't just about the consequences of cyberbullying and cancel culture, but also the cult-mentality of it and how others are influenced into it.

(x) Storm Pazuzu The people in charge here are shit. I could do a much better job

Fuuta did not come out of the womb cancelling people, but due to the injustice he saw around him and his desire to Do Something About It, he was influenced into this cesspool of online toxicity and cancel culture.

Now, it's his turn to influence justice. And boy, did he.

[naneun-no]

From my drafts so it’s late but:

Today’s delulu thought is that Standing Next to You has too many lyrical coincidences to not be about Jimin.

🫣 I SAID IT WAS DELUSIONAL OKAY

You are free to disagree. You probably should 🤣

I mean we know it wasn’t written by Jung Kook but obviously the version he recorded was arranged with and for JK, and “leave your body golden” can’t be a coincidence right? Like it’s the whole ass album name, plus a word that carries connotations of JK himself, which the ppl who worked with him on Seven must have known.

So if that wasn’t a coincidence… then what about:

1. “How we left and right is something we control” — a callback to both Left and Right by CP feat JK, but also a nod to Butter, a massive BTS hit and a song that he performs alongside his boyfie bestie JM.

2. “When it’s deep like DNA, something they can’t take away” — a callback to another massive BTS hit, interesting. And *delulu warning* also reminds me of JM and JK’s extreme similarities that they themselves have referred to before?? They’re wired the same, they have the same sense of humor, they live and breathe for the same shit and even though they have some very key differences, they really do seem like twin flames (even if you just see it as platonic). They are similar in ways that seem braided into the fibers of their being. Like, in their DNA 🧬 some may say. *delulu warning #2* I’m also reminded of Jimin’s Letter lyrics: “After all this time has passed will we still be the same? Just like we were when we first met.”

Also, “something they can’t take away” is an interesting turn of phrase… more on that later.

3. Okay the real meaty part:

Screaming I’ll testify that we'll survive the test of time, they can't deny our love. They can't divide us, we'll survive the test of time I promise I'll be right here

[I seriously can’t believe how closeted-couple-coded this song is]

First off, again with the Letter lyrics mirrored here with the “test of time.” Then it’s got all this drama about being ripped apart and how it won’t happen and how they’ll be next to each other no matter what and that they have “something they can’t take away.”

Not only does all that line up with other Letter lyrics, but it is so goddamn dramatic and for what?

Be for real, what straight couple in this day and age would have this much working against them?? The only possible explanations are: 1) within the fantasy world of a song I suppose this could be some sort of Romeo and Juliet/West Side Story motif, and to be fair the music video did have a kind of rival gang/crime family look to it? Sort of? With the men fighting below the stage? Idk. Or it could be 2) the fact that idols do in fact often have to hide even their straight relationships, which is wild to me. But I know it’s a thing, so. I suppose there’s that. JK doesn’t seem the type though honestly. I think he’d be even more open about it than V.

On the other hand, the lyrics seem SO fit for a couple who are a) queer, b) closeted, c) currently in/about to be in a legislatively homophobic military and country (am I saying that right? Lol) and d) internationally famous pop idols in the SAME BAND who are both widely regarded as heterosexual sex symbols and would be shunned by many people in their homeland AND internationally if their queerness were to be revealed, much less if they were truly an item and THAT news broke.

Whew. That was a lot but like… that would be a real example of a relationship that would be VERY threatened by outside forces plotting against them and trying to separate them. Not JK and a hot blonde model, not him and a Korean actress, not basically any other scenario but a queer relationship.

Idk I know he didn’t write it but like ??? What the hell is that theme? I’m dying to get inside the mind of the people who DID write it, because are they or are they jikookers at this point like?!

4. Just for fun I’ll also point out the “leave your body golden like the sun and moon” 😏 like. Okay. At this point the songwriters are watching Jikook compilations, drooling over @slaaverin edits like convince me they’re not. CONVINCE ME.

5. “Deeper than the rain”?! “The pain”?! Alright I’m not even serious at this point but ??? Rainy day fight 🌧️?!?! 🤣🤣

6. “Standing next to you” oh you mean like… for 18 months? In a companion enlistment program? Like that?

Alright alright I’m done but you get my point. What even is this song if not an anthem of jikookery?! It’s more on-the-nose than Letter, more sneaky than Still With You. It wasn’t written by JK but at this point I’m calling that the songwriters are as delulu as me.

Hope y’all are well. If you made it to the end of this thank you for donning your tinfoil hat with me and I hope you at least got a giggle.

✌️

[david-talks-sw]

What's 'Star Wars' about?

A while ago I got an 'Ask' that concluded with "what is Star Wars about, if not the Jedi, right?" And weirdly enough... I have to disagree.

I mean... to me? Yes. Star Wars is about the Jedi. A Jedi-less, Sith-less, lightsaber-less Star Wars movie or series will struggle to get me on board (which is why I was surprised that I loved Andor so much).

But if you read everything George Lucas said, if you think about the Jedi's place in his two trilogies... they're not front and center, right?

Sure, there's Luke Skywalker... but he's a learner, in the Original Trilogy. Same goes for Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi, in the Prequels. They're going through character arcs.

Otherwise, the Jedi are either used as mentors to the protagonist...

... or to deliver exposition...

... but they're mostly vectors Lucas uses to present his thesis.

Functionally-speaking, the Jedi are important in that they embody the Buddhist philosophies the movie's themes are based on.

But when it comes to the plot, they're secondary. That's because the the themes of these films are bigger than the Jedi themselves.

So the question becomes... what's are the themes?

The primary goal of the Star Wars films is to inspire kids to start thinking outside the box and teach them a set of values and psychological motifs that have been passed down through mythology and fairy tales.

These values can be summed up in the dichotomy between greed and compassion / selfishness and selflessness / pleasure and joy.

We all have both aspects and need to strike a balance between the two. After all, being greedy ultimately comes from fear and being afraid can happen to all of us. Problem is, unchecked fear can lead to anger, hate and a whole lot of suffering.

The more selfish you are, the more you want things and the more you're afraid that you'll lose everything you have, you'll get angry when someone tries to take it and that will hurt everyone around you.

In other words, fear is the path to the tempting/addictive Dark Side.

Thus, seeing as we'll be inevitably tempted by the Dark Side and give in at some point (because nobody's perfect), we should aim to be as selfless and compassionate as possible for our own good... but also for the greater good, because we're all connected to a life energy. You can call it Qi or God; in Star Wars it's known as the Force.

As such, we all form a symbiotic circle and working with that in mind is better than putting ourselves first and draining from everything and everyone around us.

But we also need to be careful because there will be people who give in to that selfish side and will try to control everything. When the time comes, we must stand up for what's right.

So that's Lucas' thesis.

If I had to sum them up, the six movies illustrate it as follows:

The Prequel Trilogy is about the consequences of greed, explored through Anakin on a smaller scale and the Senate on a larger one.

The Original Trilogy shows the triumph of compassion, through Luke, Leia & Han and the Rebellion's fight against the Empire.

Lucas talked about it multiple times, the Prequels are about how Anakin becomes Darth Vader and how the Republic becomes the Empire, and in both those cases, it happens because they're greedy.

The Senate is greedy in the more classical sense. They could give a shit about "symbiosis", no they're taking bribes, letting corporations dictate policy, using loopholes to keep themselves in power and halting any meaningful progress out of fear that the new status quo will conflict with their own self-serving goals.

Anakin's greed manifests in a different way. He turns to the Dark Side because of his attachment. He wants to stop Padmé from dying... but not because he wants to save her, rather he wants to save himself from feeling the pain of loss again and will do anything to not have to live without her, her own wishes and the natural cycle of life and death be damned.

In both cases, they cave under pressure orchestrated by Palpatine, but nobody puts a gun to their head. They make a deliberate choice that comes from a selfish place, and neither one takes personal responsibility for it, they blame others, the Separatists in the case of the Senate and the Jedi in Anakin's case.

The Republic becomes an Empire with thunderous applause, betraying the people it was meant to protect.

And when faced between doing something he knows is right and giving in to his selfish desires...

... Anakin elects to do the latter, thus betraying his family and leaving the Force in darkness.

These selfish choices impact the galaxy as a whole, including the only characters in the trilogy who were doing their best to be compassionate and live in symbiosis: the Jedi, Padmé and Bail.

These champions of the Light Side are stuck playing catch-up or helplessly witnessing the events unfold, throughout the trilogy. They're playing by the rules and Palpatine uses this to his advantage.

Thus, as the galaxy tears itself apart because of Palpatine's manipulations, the Jedi and Bail are ignored and gradually weakened until they're either rendered irrelevant or killed.

A new order is born, one built on blood, lies and greed: the Empire.

But a new hope remains.

While before, the Jedi and people like Bail stood alone as everything around them became willfully corrupt... now, a Rebellion inspired by their legacy has banded together to overthrow the current order. But they don't fight for power or personal glory, they fight for altruistic, compassionate reasons. There's a sense of general responsibility that moves them, they're all doing their part.

On a larger scale, we focus on the Rebels, who are tired of seeing people suffer and decided this needs to stop. They have gone from being passive, to proactive.

On a more personal scale, we see the evolution of Luke, from naive farmer to a hero, and guess what? More and more selfish people - like Han or Lando - are inspired to join the Rebellion, after seeing the exploits of Luke, Leia, or even Ben.

It all culminates in the final film, wherein:

The Rebels band together with the Ewoks - literal teddy bears whom the Empire, in their arrogance, never even considered to be a threat - to destroy the Second Death Star and free the galaxy from imperial tyranny.

At the same time, Emperor Palpatine pressures Luke, who is tempted by the Dark Side like his father was.

But instead of giving in to his selfish desire to kill Darth Vader for all the horrors he's done...

... he finds the strength to rise above it, instead showing compassion for his father, which, in turn, inspires Anakin to do the same.

He faces a choice, like he did in Palpatine's office, two decades prior...

... and this time he chooses right.

Children teach you compassion. Anakin lets go of his fear and anger, and saves his son at the cost of his own life, finally bringing balance back to the Force.

Good triumphed over evil. Its champions achieved victory by being selfless, hopeful and fighting together / helping each other.

And that's it, that's how the movies thematically tie together.

As you can see, the Jedi aren't that directly impactful on the overall plot, because it revolves around Anakin, Luke and the respective factions/institutions around them.

But what the Jedi do bring to the table is their ability to teach and inspire others, both in-universe and out. They're spiritually impactful.

The Jedi are the epitome of compassion, and it's partially through them that George Lucas teaches his values to the audience.

[all444miles]

Hiii, I just saw that you were doing requests so I was wondering if you could do e-42 miles with black readers hair? Like helping her pick out different braiding and natural styles, maybe some wash day headcanons as well?

— TOUCH MY HAIR

— pairing: e-42 miles x fem!black!reader — genre: fluff — summary: just miles loving you and your hair ‹3 — a/n: tyyyy for this req, i am squealing rn + i alr had this idea in my prompt list but u gave me a reason to start it !! ‹3 my hcs always got miles saying sum outta pocket then the reader calls him out then he goes “my fault”, its a lil funny motif ima keep on adding 😭 also the n word is used a bit in this, js sayin!! enjoy ♡ ᖭི(ˊᗜˋ*)ᖫྀ

we all know n we've established this, miles is more than happy to pay for ur shit, esp if its your hair.

he wouldn't think twice before sending you the money for you to get your hair done. he wont listen or care if you say no, either.

"miles, bae, why u sendin me 200?" "what else? so you can get your hair done, mami." "baby, you know damn well that's too much." "buy yourself some other stuff too, if you wanna, but that money yours now, i ain't takin it back." "you.. you do too much." "mhm, make sure to show me a pic of when you get it done, you heard?"

he's always your hype man, for sure.

i got a feeling he a major fan of faux locs or boho/godess braids, so if you got that on? he'll fold.

"dayum ma, that shit looks good." "i cant even lie, Aaliyah did real good on this. she sure was tryna make me go broke though.." "worth every cent, cuz you look fine as hell with them faux locs." "miles." "im just saying, mami, your hair, like.. lord have mercy." "miles!" "my fault, i ain't lying though."

when your hair’s all natural, he loves to watching you style your hair for school, events, etc.

one time you let him style your hair, and you couldn’t even lie, it actually looked pretty good.

“these edges.. how do y'all do this shit every day?” “miles, baby, it ain’t that hard. look, lemme show you.”

you had to show him a quick tiktok tut on how to do edges, took him 2 videos before he got it 😭

“see that? like a c shape, and swoop it.” “..like this?” “yeah! you gotta do that like, 4 more times though.” “ay, dios mio. (oh my God). Mama, i ain’t doing allat.”

and wash day? his absolute favorite.

(short drabble ahead!)

Good Days by SZA played from Miles' speaker, blasting in the background, the gentle splashes of the warm water from the shower onto your curls.

You relaxed, your head leaning back further into the bathtub, your lover grabbing your scalp massager and rubbing it into your scalp carefully, shampoo mixed in, the rest of your products on the end corner of your bathtub.

"Ma, you know you really needed this wash. Your hair was tangled as shit, like a lion or sum.” he says, laughing halfway through his sentence. You scoff at him jokingly, "Miles, when you have hair as long and thick as mine, you can violate my hair."

Miles protested, adding the conditioner to your hair, setting your scalp massager aside. "Baby, my hair is basically almost as long as yours."

"Yeah, almost." you spoke, putting your fingers up to his face in pinching motion, the gems on your acrylics just an inch close to touching his nose, a grin on your face. He backed up, pushing your hands out of his face, continuing your wash routine. "Princesa, lemme finish washing yo hair without your hands all up in my face."

About 3 and a half hours later, your hair was washed and in overnight twists with your bonnet on. You laid with Miles in your bed, legs on top of each others, tired.

"Y'know, you actually good at dealin' wit my hair." you spoke, giving Miles a kiss on his forehead. “When you got a mama like mine, you pretty much have to.” Miles chuckled, shaking his head. “You should let me do it more often.” You smiled in response.

He buried his head into the crook of your neck, slowly dozing off by the way you'd play with the silk of his durag. "I love you Miles."

He mumbled words once again into your neck, half asleep, but you knew what he said.

"I love you more, mi vida."

© all444miles 2023. do not plagerize, copy, or repost my work in any way shape or form, without my permission.

likes, reblogs, comments and asks are always appreciated !

[wen-kexing-apologist]

I am being so so sincere when I say that Episode 10 of The Miracle of Teddy Bear has just secured a spot as one of my favorite BL episodes of all time.

What a fucking compelling, complex, brilliant, and contained piece of work. I am really really loving the dimensionality they bring to Nut and the way that he engages in his relationship with Tofu and his mother in this show as a whole and in this episode especially. Seeing Mathana so calmly, sweetly, and sincerely inquiring about Tofu and Nut’s feeling towards one another, in a way that felt completely absent of judgment only to immediately be met by Nut’s anger was fucking phenominal! The Miracle of Teddy Bear has been handling trauma, and trauma response so brilliantly across the entire show, but Episode 10 was a stand out example of how the writing for this show and Job’s performance as Nut really add so much nuance and flavor to this story and this character. 

I feel like so many BLs are hesitant to let their romantic leads harbor a lot of anger, but not The Miracle of Teddy Bear, Nut’s anger is explosive and it is fast. Nut can go from zero to one hundred in a blink of an eye, in a step, in a breath and that all stems from Nut’s history as a survivor of abuse. His father was extremely abusive, and incredibly homophobic, and his mother was a victim of that abuse as well and as a result was unable to protect Nut from all the shit his father put him through. And she was raised in a generation that was told there were rules and was never allowed to question them. She learned pink is for girls and blue is for boys and does not have any answer to a question of “but why?” nor does she have the space in the household with Sib to ask that question herself and realize there is no legitimate answer.

I believe that Nut is fundamentally a good person, but I absolutely adored how much of this episode really navigated us through Nut being an absolute piece of shit to his mother, his friends and their family, and his partner as a result of his history as a survivor of abuse while also showing us this timid, terrified, simp of a high school boy having his first romance. Especially because for me it really highlights how much of this anger that Nut has stems directly from whatever events ended his relationship with Tarn. At no point in the flashback to a very short, and incredibly sweet BL within a BL have we seen Nut angry, he is only capable of fear that his family will find out that he is gay. It runs so counter to the hair trigger rage Nut carries with him in adulthood. When I saw the way Nut behaved at Gen’s house, I legitimately had a moment where I was just so incredibly thankful that Gen’s parents are as kind as they are and seem to constantly provide love and support to Nut even when he is being a terrible guest and misbehaving at the table because his anger runs so deep he does not have a handle on it. 

From a writing and messaging perspective (I feel the need to clarify lest you think I support this kind of behavior in real live) I love, love, loved that Nut was using Tofu without Tofu’s permission and in many cases to the detriment of Tofu’s own comfort to the point where Tofu actually breaks in his own dedication to Nut and has to drag him outside to talk to him about generational trauma and the ways in which he is perpetuating cycles of abuse in his own household. Because that is a fundamental message of this show. Mathana and Saen are manipulated out of their relationship by Jan, Mathana feels pressure to get married because of her mother’s perceptions of the role of women in society, and as a result marries Sib who she doesn’t love, which contributes, I think, in part to Sib’s future abuse of his family because he knows his wife is in love with his brother and not him, with a major contributor to the Sib’s violence in the household being the perceptions of masculinity. 

Side note: One of my absolute favorite recurring motifs in this episode was the use of bars to make everyone feel trapped in the flashbacks of abuse.

This episode shows us the ways in which Nut has internalized some of the beliefs of his father, when he tells Tofu essentially that his mother failed to steer him away from being gay, when that is obviously an impossible task, and so expertly lets the anger of this episode be fueled by those beliefs, the resentment and frustration that stems from Nut having to serve some level of caregiver role to his mother because of her mental health, and Nut’s current inability to see the bigger picture and understand that his mother was also a victim of domestic violence in that household who did not have the ability to stand up for herself and her child all at the same time. And it is also so easy to understand why Nut is not able to see his mother as a victim in every absolutely heartbreaking flashback we get to little baby Nut looking up at his mother while he is being abused just absolutely hoping that she will do something more than stand there and watch it happen.

Nut is trying so desperately to get a reaction out of his mother, to prove that this anger that he has, that this pain that he carries from this piece of history we don’t even have the full story for yet is real, is justified, and that change and healing cannot happen. But it can. We haven’t even seen the events that lead to Nut’s break-up with Tarn yet and we’re already getting so much information about it from the way that Nut enters that coming out scene already fighting, already assuming his mother will have a problem, screaming at her and not giving her any opportunity to speak. And then getting mad at her when she doesn’t say anything about him being physically intimate with Tofu in front of her. Which I’ve already said was incredibly well written because Nut is so focused on his own anger it takes time for him to understand what he is doing to Tofu. 

And even when he leaves, when he goes to Gen, when he hears the reason and the sense, and admits to the fact that he was in the wrong, that unjustified justified anger doesn’t go away magically, his behavior isn’t automatically fixed. He knows that he put Tofu in an uncomfortable position, and then continues to do it anyway because there is no one that can drive you to anger faster than a parent. And I for one am so grateful this show is letting Nut leave shrapnel in his wake. 

I am truly so impressed with this episode and with the entire show so far. If you did not jump on the Miracle of Teddy Bear train when @lurkingshan and @twig-tea were watching it a few weeks ago, please take this as a sign you should attempt it. I know it’s long, but GODDAMN IT IS SO FUCKING GOOD.

[anonymouscheeses]

Vaggie and Valentino are connected and no one has been talking about it (I think 😭)

Brutha. I've always known this but like these two are surface level similar yet so SO SO SOOOO different its terrifying.

Question might be, why tf am I comparing the r*pist and the beautiful, gorgeous, fantastic, inspiring, humble, generous, smeggsy, former angel?

Simply because they are both moth demon's that speak Spanish. It's a bit too specific. And rlly that's kind of all I have right now. Sure, you could say "erm actually, Vaggie isn't a moth demon 🤓" and ur probably right. But if she's not, why is it that in her redesign for the show they lean into the moth hair? It's look much MUCH more moth than in the pilot. So if Viv wanted to stray away from the moth theme, why make it look more like that? She may not he exactly a moth demon but she does have intentional moth features. Perhaps Vaggie just disguised herself like that, either way, still a connection..

I would get it if one of them were in helluva boss jst as a way to recycle and make room or whatever. But no, they are in the same show, same world, same ring of hell, same city(I think). It's a weird connection and I kind of don't want it to exist. Like at all. Because if they are connected I can't think of any other way they are except that Val could be a fallen angel. Which I CANT imagine. Unless Vaggie is like, a winner that became an exterminator, but genuinely that would be a bit complex. But what isn't in this show. Then again, Adam said he created her, or that could be a metaphor for that Vaggie was never noticed as a human and just brushed off to the side so therefore Adam "created" her (created a name and image/status of her). But that's unlikely, I don't they would be that smart lmao.

Personality wise, they both have anger issues. Pilot Vaggie and show Valentino are more alike but show Vaggie is still somewhat spicy. They also both have hot voices, sorry not sorry, like fuck Val (not literally) but his voice is BAZINGA 😍 and I'm a simp for Stephanie Beatriz. I'm a simple gal.

Design wise they have rare commonalities. They are both heavily red but thats everyone in the show it make my eyes bleed. But. A weird thing someone pointed out in a slideshow on tiktok is that show Valentino has white stripes on his hips. Me personally I'm not sure what to think about it really. Like I mean it IS a new detail that spawned AFTER the pilot and it is like... on the EXACT place. But like, it's such a weird thing to include when it's such a common pose yknow?

Also the X's on the boobs are so sensual I cannot be the only one. And ykno Val is the king of sensual (🤮)

Maybe you could be asking, "if Val and Vaggie r connected jst because they are moth demons then that jst means that anyone that are the same species are somehow tied to eachother huh? 🤓" like Angel Dust and Zestial. But what I think differs from that is the fact these two have actual big similarities apart from jst the fact they are moths. Like what I just explained, personality, design, both speak Spanish. While Angel Dust and Zestial are only just both spiders. Angel's reason for being a spider is due to the ykno, "web of crime" thing. And Zesty man? Idk he probably got bit and fucking died by a poisonous spider. I mean, health shit wasn't exactly great back in his ye olde time.

For Val and Vaggie we have NO idea why they are moths

But I did find this! From google AI.....? (I didn't even know that was a thing..) but, I think it's true. It explains the dynamic with Angel alot and I think that's an interesting detail.

Which could also apply to Vaggie because of her hyper-dependency on Charlie.

Plus this fits Vaggie so. SO much. If my theory that Vaggie just disguised herself as a moth to blend in then that would be a good connection to the entire moth motif. Love, I don't even need to explain.

It can fit Val too if you think abt the disguise part a bit. Like he disguises himself as this charming and calming figure to avoid suspicion and lure victims... fucking creepy 🤮

Also in Vaggie's past designs she was more moth.

Here is like. ONE image I could find that wasn't too blurry. Like I wouldn't say it's heavy moth but I think if you asked me what insect she was based off I would guess moth in like a few minutes. The colors being dark, the fluffy legwarmers. Yum, that's a mothy. (THIS DESIGN YHO KINDA PISSES ME OFF. WHY IS THERE THE FEMALE SIGN OK HER SHIRY I THOUGHT SHE WAS STRAIGHT IN THIS VER??? also str8 vaggie scares me don't ever bring up that thing around me. They are NOT the same. #notmyvagina)

From what I know there aren't any previous old beta designs of Valentino, so he was likely made for the show specifically.

Overall, they are both sexy Spanish speakers who are moth demons, in the same show, oddly specific connected design choices, and have some anger issues.

Oh also they both hate Angel Dust 💜