#we played for 3 hours straight yesterday

[rapunzelsunshine]

playing cards with siblings can be one of the most frustrating experiences i swear,, but its for the sake of bonding

[sugrhigh]

BOY NEXT DOOR 3 - ( c.s )

part two

summary- you and your roommates live beside a bunch of senior hockey players, one of them being the infamous team captain chris sturniolo. he’s effortlessly flirty and undeniably attractive, but he’s also a pain in your ass. you find that you have to fight between lust and hatred as you finally get to know the boy next door, whether you want to or not.

warnings- swearing, a bit of drinking

neighbor/hockey!chris x fem!reader

a/n: part three baby here we go! hope you guys enjoy!! if i forgot a tag it either wouldn’t let me or i missed it (if i missed u pls comment and i’ll fix it right up). anyways kisses for u all i hope ur having a good day, my inbox is open for anything as always MWAH

@cutenote @mattybsbitch @mattsmunch @breeloveschris @l9vesick @bb-1s-blog @sturnifyed @julessspoetry @annamcdonalds67 @beijhe @gnxosblog @braindead4l @hearts4matty @orangeypepsi @luckistar-posts @angelworldspost @ponyosturniolo @rainyenthusiastdaze @heartz4chris @sturnvvz @cupidsword @wurlibydominicfike @mattswrld @yoursopretty15 @poopydroopt @latinasforchrizz @bernardsleftbootycheek @trilliwarner

it’s been a day since the kiss, and you still haven’t told a single soul. for some reason, you’re way too scared to admit what happened to your roommates, even though you know they’d be the last to judge you for it.

and yet you just can’t, despite the fact that it’s been eating you alive for over twenty-four hours straight. saying it out loud makes it real, so you decided it was best to keep it inside.

however, you still need to give chris his jersey back, which you’ve been neglecting to do because you don’t want to see him.

or maybe because you’re scared.

it’s an involuntary thought, and it makes you angry. there’s nothing to be scared of, because he doesn’t have any power over you.

right?

you grab his jersey off the top of your dresser. it’s all clean, and it still smells like detergent from when you washed it yesterday. you’ve been putting it off all day, and it’s time for that to stop.

the sun is nearly gone, so you head down the stairs, silently thankful that ramona and cassidy are both are both runnings errands as you slip out the front door.

you’re in your comfy clothes, black sweats and baby blue hoodie that you stole from cass, and you’re immediately regretting the fact that you didn’t grab a jacket.

you hurry across the lawn, passing the cars parked in the driveway. there’s an unfamiliar red one at the end, and it almost makes you pause, but the possibility doesn’t fully connect in your mind yet.

so you head up the steps and knock on the door loudly, still very much so a woman on a mission.

it takes a moment, a long moment, before someone comes to open it for you. it’s connor, which is unfortunate, because you really weren’t prepared to speak with anyone besides the one boy you’re actually looking for.

he looks a little confused, but he smiles nonetheless. “what’s up?”

“i’m just, uh, trying to drop off chris’s jersey.” any bit of confidence you had is gone now as you choke on your words.

connor’s eyes widen a little as his grin fades, though you can tell he’s trying to play it off. “he’s a little busy right now, but i’ll get it to him.”

your eyebrows furrow as he reaches his arms out, like he’s trying to rush the process along without any more interrogation.

“busy with what?” you question, though you hand it over regardless.

he looks at you for just a half a second too long, like he’s waiting for you to piece it together, and then it clicks. chris is busy because he has a girl over, and that’s her car in the driveway.

you wish it didn’t phase you, but you can feel your face morphing into an emotion that borders disgust and anger.

“oh, i see.” is all you say, because you’re already fucking embarrassed beyond belief.

you turn and head back down the stairs, trying to ignore the way your stomach is flipping like you’re going to throw up.

connor doesn’t say anything. instead you hear the door close, and you feel completely numb as you walk back to your own porch. part of it is because of the cold, and part of it is because you feel so stupid.

you’re not sure what you were expecting, but that was exactly what you should’ve anticipated knowing chris.

you step back into the warmth of your own home, and even when you close and lock the door, a shiver chases you.

you head back up to your bedroom, kicking your shoes off by the door. you want further confirmation, so you peek through the curtains that hang over your window.

chris’s room, which is coincidentally directly across from yours, reveals nothing besides a dim light that peeks through the closed blinds.

you let the drapes fall back into place, still in shock. it was so ridiculous to believe for even a second that he was any different than he had been for the last six months.

you should’ve taken him at his word. he doesn’t date, and he’s not interested in you beyond teasing you or making you look like an idiot.

and you refuse to be taken for a fool.

you pace along the floor for a second until you decide you deserve some wine. you know there’s at least half a bottle in the fridge, and maybe it’ll help you calm the hell down.

a few minutes later you’re back upstairs, huddled up in your bed with a book you had started earlier in the day, sipping from your glass as you read.

it’s hard to fall into the fantasy world you picked out at first, but then you begin to feel your cheeks flush and your eyes are suddenly devouring the words.

you’re so enveloped in the plot, completely unaware that your roommates had gotten home until ramona walks in. it startles you, so much so that you lose your page.

she pauses to take in your state; the empty glass, the minimal leftovers in the bottle you brought with you, your droopy eyes.

“wine before 7 p.m. on the lord’s day? you’re crazy.” she jokes with a grin.

you shrug, also smiling a little bit. “felt like getting a little wild.”

mona puts a hand on her hip and nods toward the door she just entered through. “well, could i maybe convince you to take this crazy train downstairs so we can catch up on VPR? we’re like, three episodes behind now.”

you snap your book closed and roll out of bed, which you can tell by her snort looks far from graceful.

“all you had to say was VPR.”

you sit at your desk, gnawing on your bottom lip as you try to focus on the stupid online homework prompts that are due soon. the overcast afternoon light pours into your room, and you hear your phone buzz against the wood.

chris

still playing hard to get?

you roll your eyes before you can help it. the text doesn’t surprise you, because he’s been messaging you for the past few days, ever since he inevitably found out you stopped by from connor.

chris

that’s clearly a yes.

you wonder how many times he’s going to text you as you put your phone down to pull your hair out of your face, tying it up at the back of your head.

once again, you hear the device vibrate, and you flip it to glance at the screen.

chris

i can see you ignoring me you know

your eyes betray you as you glance out the window, just to find chris standing in front of his own. he’s pouting at you with his phone in his hand, hair all curly and damp like he just got out of the shower.

you stand up from your chair without a second thought and take a few steps so you can yank your curtains closed.

he might refuse to believe it, but you’re not playing hard to get. you just can’t fucking stand him.

chris

now that’s just cold

come onnnnnn princess

y/n

holy shit

do NOT call me princess

chris

you love it

y/n

i hate you

chris

if you don’t stop this i’m coming over there

y/n

i’d like to see you try asshole

chris

fine.

you pull back one curtain to call his bluff, and your heart actually drops when you see that he’s not standing there anymore. that just means he’s probably on his way over already.

you have no idea if cass or ramona are home or in their rooms or what. but you do know that you’re locking your door, and if he makes it through the house undetected he’s not getting into your room.

you sit on the edge of your bed for a moment, waiting because you don’t know what else to do with yourself. and then the knock comes, right before chris twists the handle and finds it locked.

“open up.” he demands, his gruff voice muffled through the door.

“no.”

“i’ll go downstairs and get cass if you don’t let me in.” he threatens, which doesn’t really scare you.

cassidy will kick his ass out if she realizes you don’t want him here. you’ll have to explain some things, but it’s probably time to do that anyways.

“you’re being a baby and you’re wasting your time. go home, chris.” you reiterate.

“come on, i just want to talk.” he wiggles the handle once again, like that will somehow open it.

“then call a sex addiction helpline.” you reply hotly, glaring at the slab of wood that separates you as if you can actually see him, though you’re glad you can’t.

“can you please open the door?”

“nope.”

“jesus, you’re so stubborn it’s ridiculous.” he groans, and you hear his forehead thump against the door.

he’s growing frustrated now, and even though you’re heated too, you kind of love it.

“so are you! how many times do i have to tell you to leave?” you shoot back.

it’s silent for a moment, which scares you. then you hear a small sigh.

“i didn’t think i would have to do this.”

the lock on the door begins to twist and turn rapidly, and you leap forward to grab it with your hand.

chris twists it hard and your fingers fumble to keep it jammed. your thumb is already in pain, and the harder he pushes the closer you are to failing. you’re finally forced to let go as chris comes shoving his way into your room a few seconds later.

even though he stumbles slightly, he looks so proud of himself, clutching the heavy duty paper clip he used to get inside.

“there, that’s better.” he says smugly.

you watch his eyes take in your room, covered in posters and full of random artifacts, and you hate it. for some reason, it feels deeply personal.

“holy shit, why don’t you just go home already?”

it’s impossible to keep your tone level anymore as you turn away from him.

“i’m here now, so you have to talk to me.”

“no, i really don’t.” you reply before plopping down onto your mattress, crossing your arms as you lean against the headboard.

“don’t be a brat.” chris follows your lead, even though you weren’t inviting him to join you.

he falls beside you, sprawling out on his back by your feet. his shirt raises over his sweats, exposing a bit of skin above the band of his boxers, and you have to tear your eyes away.

you can feel the warmth of his body, can smell his aftershave mixed with hints of some kind of fresh body wash, and all of it drives you crazy.

you curl your body into itself so there’s as much distance between the two of you as possible.

“why are you so mad?” chris turns his head slightly so he can look at you.

“i’m not mad, you just disgust me.”

this makes him smile. “i beg to differ, i think you like me.”

without hesitation, you extend one leg to kick him in his side. even though it’s not very forceful, he lets out a little groan of surprise, hand going to rub his hip as he frowns.

“you didn’t have to kick me, damn.”

“you deserved that.” you argue, tucking your knees back to your chest.

this time he stays silent and just looks at you. his eyes scan your face, darting down to your lips every other second, and you’re suddenly very aware of your surroundings.

“what the fuck are you staring at?” you ask in a brief moment of panic.

his eyes are so unnerving. it’s like he can see right through you.

“you’re pretty.” chris shrugs before averting his gaze back to the ceiling.

your face flushes, and you force yourself to remember the embarrassment from the other day, how stupid you felt after discovering that he’s still the same old player that sits beside you now.

“shouldn’t you be giving some other girl an STD or something?” you snap, and he huffs out a breathy laugh.

“first of all, i’m totally clean. and if you’d actually let me explain, you’d realize the girl that was over on sunday is just an ex fling who was picking up some old stuff.”

his clarification shocks you, though you still don’t necessarily believe it yet. he could be lying, even though it doesn’t seem like he is.

“you’re seriously telling me you weren’t hooking up with her?” you ask.

“it was strictly platonic. nothing happened.” he confirms, shifting to face you again.

chris lifts his hand to trace gentle patterns along your shins, and you don’t shy away this time. the feeling of his palms, even when separated by your leggings, is far nicer than you imagined.

“okay.” you mutter simply.

“you’ve been ignoring me the entire week and all i get is an ‘okay’?” he halts his movements so he can curl his fingers into air quotes.

“what would you like me to say?”

“an apology would be a nice start.”

you bark out a laugh. “an apology for what? for not talking to you? because i really didn’t take you for the sensitive type.”

he just shakes his head, nudging your legs with one of his knuckles lightly. “god, you and that headstrong attitude will be the death of me.”

“can’t wait.” you quip back, and now its his turn to chuckle.

silence settles over the two of you for a moment, and you’ve been far too close for too long, so you move to stand once again.

“alright, well, we talked. time for you to get lost.” you motion toward the door.

chris sits up, running a hand through his messy hair before he replies. “look, we don’t have another game until sunday, so we’re hosting at the house tomorrow. you should come.”

you raise an eyebrow and tap your chin, like you’re really contemplating. “i’ll have to think about it.”

“please? it’ll only be fun if you go.” he flashes you a charming smile, and you hate that it actually does kind of work.

“maybe i’ll make a special appearance. maybe.” you point a wary finger at him as he gets back on his feet.

“that’s what i like to hear.” chris says, making his way toward you.

you expect him to pass right by, but he lingers, like there’s something else on his mind. he stares down at you with those big blue eyes, and you can feel yourself slipping into dangerous territory.

“is there something else?” you ask softly, and the sound of your voice is maddening to him.

you don’t even try to tempt chris on purpose, he knows this, and yet everything about you is so enticing. not to mention he hasn’t been able to stop thinking about the kiss since it happened, or that pretty little mouth of yours.

but he shakes his head again, because the things he’s thinking about you so early on in this strange relationship frighten him.

“uh, no, sorry. i’ll see you tomorrow, hopefully.”

and then he blows right by you without waiting for a response, disappearing just as quickly as he arrived.

[paper-mario-wiki]

alright so, i said a few days ago that i might do a sponsored stream as a fun way of making some money. this was due to my upcoming move, and i was thinking about ways i could put together the inevitably huge moving costs, though i wasn't worried too much about it so this was more of a fun idea than an actual idea.

HOWEVER. yesterday was supposed to be the day that the roommates and i finally decided on the place we'd be going. we had 3 options, and ALL of them fell through for different reasons within a span of 5 hours. Plans A, B, and C all became unactionable seven days before our lease ends. as you can imagine, most of last night and this morning has been a lot of scrambling to put together a new, less advantageous solution out of (truthfully) desperation. and the one we have come to is costly, but unfortunately it's the only winning hand we can play right now. and we HAVE played it, and we HAVE secured a place to live, though only a month after our lease ends. before then, we'll need to pay for two months of a four-person rent, with only 3 people (since one person is moving home at the end of the lease).

with that in mind, in the near future (within the month probably), i'll likely be hosting a fairly straight-forward fundraiser stream. it's something that i've been avoiding for the past year on principle, as it's been important to me to make all of my money from an employer and not through the goodwill of strangers online. and i have been so far, which has been great! but my income (and the income of my roommates) is not the kind of pay that can account for sporadic $2,000 surprises with a one-month deadline out of nowhere, ya kno. granted, i'll still be busting my ass at my job, but the thing about working at a small company is that sometimes there's only so much work and so many hours to go around.

this stream won't be a followup to any previous Big Series streams (so no homestuck, sorry), but i will only move forward with it when i have an idea that i feel is actually worth a $2,000 stream. or at least the one that gets closest before the deadline comes knocking.

i apologize for needing to ask again for help like this, and i thank you for understanding.

[theitgirlnetwork]

Earn It

Ch. 7: Heaven's Happiness

Note: As always, the love this story receives amazes me. Thank you so much for reading. Thank you for the notes, the reblogs, the comments and messages. Interacting makes this so much fun! I hope you all enjoy this chapter. There will be a lot more time skips from here on out! So you'll all get to know the gang as adults. I will ask that if anyone wants to use my story as inspo for one of your own, or anything else, you let me know, it's more fun that way. I also don't post this or any of my other stuff anywhere else. Once again, hi to my best friend who now reads this story, love you miss girl <3 Anywayyy, I hope you all enjoy! Thanks for reading <3

Taglist:@spookystitchery@anehkael@fkaams@butterflyybabe@sun2flower @holierthancunt @silkenthusiasts @wolflover384 @liziihorta @summerssover @jackierose902109

Warnings: Some strong language

“She’s very gifted, Mr. and Mrs. Whitlock. The best I’ve seen at this age in my career. You could have a professional dancer on your hands.”

The three adults watch from the observing window as Heaven demonstrates Grand Adage for a group of her peers. Her little back straight and stomach tight as she accomplishes the move with a stern discipline that many adults struggle to achieve. 

“We know. So why is she playing Clara?” 

“Beatrice-”

“I’m just wondering, Luca, I mean I just believe it’s our right as her parents to ask Madame Sidorov why our 9 year old daughter is teaching the snowflakes that are twice her age the dance she doesn’t get to be a part of.” 

Madame Sidorov swallows hard as she brings her clipboard to her chest. She’s been running her youth dance company for over 20 years. Many of her dancers have gone on to be successful, working artists. But she’d never seen talent like Heaven Whitlock. The girl came into her studio at the age of 6, excited to show her that she already knew how to go en pointe even though children really shouldn’t and normally couldn’t do it until they were 11. Madame Sidorov had been overcome with excitement. She had a star on her hands. 

The older woman also learned that Beatrice Whitlock also knew what she had. The teacher has dealt with gunner parents before, but none like the stern young woman who trailed in behind her prodigy daughter with her nose in the sky and demands on her tongue. 

“Mrs. Whitlock, Clara is the lead role in the Nutcracker-”

“Bullshit, Sidorov, we both know that the prima dancer role is the Sugar Plum Fairy and the arguably most complicated dance is the Waltz of the Snowflakes, the dance you had my daughter demonstrating yesterday. So,” Beatrice’s heels click as she shifts her weight from one leg to another, hip jutting out. “Why is your best dancer playing the dumb little girl who spends most of the ballet watching everyone else dance?”

“I think my wife is frustrated because we all know our daughter is talented. So we’re having a hard time understanding why those talents aren’t being showcased.” Luca cuts, wrapping an arm around his wife’s waist in an attempt to calm her. 

“Heaven is only 9. We need to allow the older dancers to play the more advanced roles-” 

“Then they should be better.” Beatrice interrupts, swinging her purse over her shoulder, pushing her shades up onto her head. “How about this, until your priorities are straight, we can take Heaven somewhere where things are fair and you can dust off your pointe shoes and start teaching again instead of using my child.”

“But, all of my friends go there.” Heaven whines as they speed their way down the highway for the hour drive back to their home. “I don’t want to find another studio.”

“I know, Stellina, but we want you to have every opportunity. Wouldn’t you want more chances to dance?”

Heaven is stubbornly silent in the backseat, her step father softly pats her foot, reaching back from the driver seat. Her mother turns to face her, a noncommittal look on her face. “Baby, when you came to Mommy a couple years ago, what did you say you wanted to be when you grew up?”

The younger girl bites her lip, tugging irritably at her seatbelt. “A ballerina.”

“Just a ballerina?”

Heaven huffs, crossing her arms over her chest, looking away from her mother. “The best ballerina ever.”

“The best ballerina. Ever. And Mommy and Papino have worked very hard to make that possible for you, yes? Practice everyday, paying for lessons, buying you everything you need. But you’re a big girl now. You’re going to have to learn how to work very hard too if you want to be the best, baby. We can only take you part of the way. You need to think super hard about whether this is what you want. You need to think about if you’re going to earn it.”

Beatrice’s voice is soft and kind, but her words are harsh. She turns around, not waiting for a response from her daughter, satisfied that her whines and complaints had quieted to obedient, stifled little sniffles. 

Heaven stares down at her hands through wet lashes, her bottom lip wobbling as she smothers her sadness. She does want it. She wants to be the best ballerina ever. She is going to be the best ballerina ever. And she’s grateful. Papino and Mommy had given a lot. And she won’t disappoint them. So she’d go to a new dance studio. She would make new friends. And if not, that wasn’t what she was there for. 

Luca Whitlock frowns as he drums his finger on the steering wheel, looking forward at the traffic ahead of them. “How about some ice cream, Stellina? Might cheer you up?” 

Identical sets of brown eyes meet in the rearview mirror. The little girl in the backseat simply sinks against the leather, forcing indifference into her voice. “No thank you, Papino, I’m…not hungry.”

“And you have your, um,” Heaven scratches her head, mentally scrolling through the list of items Tashi would need at home. She was going to spend the first few weeks post-knee surgery with her parents. Heaven had stayed with her girlfriend for the days following the injury, lying to her school and telling them she had a death in the family that required her to take some time away. She just wanted to get Tashi settled before she headed back to UCLA. 

The dancer had assumed that their boyfriend would emerge out of the shadows, and use his charm to weasel out of an apology, ultimately taking over Tashi’s care since he had the most free time.

Unfortunately, he continued to disappoint her. So, instead, she lingered. Slept in Tashi’s bed with her, unwrapped and rewrapped her knee. Cleaned her dorm, brought her any work she missed. The girls in the athletic dorm thought she’d moved in. But now, Tashi’s parents were here to take her home for a little while. 

“I have everything, Hev, you made sure of that.” 

Her heart aches. Tashi sounds so tired. So down. Heaven is so frustrated. She’s ready to move past this part. She wants Tashi to just be better. She tells herself over and over that the surgery would fix it. That once she got the treatment she needs and a little physical therapy, she’d be back to where she was, ready to take over the world with her. 

“I’ll see you when we open, right? You’re still gonna come?” Heaven rocks on her feet, careful not to bump Tashi’s crutch. “You don’t have to, you’ve seen me do most of the dances and I know it might be hard to travel-”

“Babe, I’ll be there. Okay? I need to go.” Tashi lifts Heaven’s chin, giving her a halfhearted peck before turning to climb into her dad’s truck, gesturing for Heaven to stop when she goes to try helping her into the high seated vehicle. “I’ll call you. Why don’t you have Art help you get your stuff from my room? He probably wants to say goodbye.”

“T, are we gonna talk more about that-”

“I told you,” Tashi shrugs, hand on the car door handle, her pajama pants poorly covering the large brace on her knee. “M’not mad. It’s fine.”

It’s not fine. Heaven isn’t stupid. Ever since Tashi and Patrick found out that she’d done…stuff with Art, Patrick has been radio silent, and all Tashi does is encourage Heaven to spend more time with Art who she was decidedly avoiding. She’d gotten…caught up in the infirmary. The combination of the heightened emotions and Art’s soft attention and care caused another moment of weakness. She’d accidentally said something that she’d been denying to herself ever since, and thanking the good lord above that Art had apparently missed. She was determined not to tempt fate for a…fourth time?

Which is why she’d gone back to Tashi’s room and started packing her stuff and straightening up without alerting the blond tennis player who’d been haunting her dreams as of late. And it’s also why she almost pissed herself when he’d somehow materialized in the dorm room doorway, rapping his knuckles against the light wood, in a failed attempt not to startle her.

“I didn’t mean to scare you, but, um, Tashi texted me and said you might need some help getting this stuff to your car.” 

He looks good. She can’t ignore that, but she can refuse to get caught up in staring at him as he leans in the doorway, muscled arms on full display as he leans in the frame, a poorly hidden pout on his face. 

“I’m good.” Heaven shrugs, slinging her bookbag over her shoulder, trying to lift her purse and her other two bags at the same time, only to have all of her belongings fall out of her purse. “Fuck.”

“Fuck, let me help you.” Art bends and starts grabbing the miscellaneous items from her bag.

“I can do it-”

“It’ll be quicker-”

“Art.” She huffs, tucking her hair behind her ears and sitting criss-crossed on the floor. “I meant it, when I said that I was done…Tashi might be trying to teach me a lesson in some kind of twisted way, and I’m sorry you’re getting mixed up in it, but I’m…I can’t be around you and be with her at the same time. Clearly, I can’t handle boundaries.”

“So…so what does that mean? Not talking at all? Is that what you want?” He asks, shoulders dropping, eyes filled with hurt as he inches closer. “Heaven-”

“Sure. If that’s what it takes for it to get you to get I can’t do” she gestures between them. “This, then fine, let’s say that’s what I want.” 

Art clenches his jaw, blinking quickly as he tries to think something he could say. Anything to change her mind. “Heaven, please, I’ll…we’d be friends. We can just, I can’t…please don’t.” he finishes, giving up on trying to articulate his thoughts through his panicked haze. Through all of this back and forth, chasing and running, he’d forgotten the chance that once Patrick was out of the picture, that he might get written out too. 

His eyes scan her face as she shakes her head, shoving the last of her stuff back into her purse and standing. “Art, it’s not like I don’t wanna be around you. But stuff is getting too complicated. This shit is just too much. I haven’t been back to my school in days, Tashi’s leg is fucked and I don’t want to make things any harder for her, Patrick is just fucking gone and I really can’t handle anything more. So when you say we can be friends, I need you to mean it. I need you to tell me we can do that.”

Art finds himself in between a rock and a hard place. He wants to be honest. He wants to acknowledge that he can’t see himself getting over her within the foreseeable future. He wants to tell her that he’s glad she’s probably not with Patrick anymore, and as bad as he feels about Tashi’s leg, he quite frankly does not understand why it has to change anything between them. 

But he’s desperate. Art is humiliated to admit it to himself but, he would do anything to keep the line of communication between him and Heaven open so if he had to appease her by saying that they would be platonic despite the fact that he quite literally gets dizzy standing next to her, fine. Like he’d told himself before, he was playing the long game, collecting the points that matter. So, offering her a tight smile, Art sticks his large hand out to her, encasing her smaller one and jumping to stand at his full height. “Friends. But, friends don’t ignore each other for days, Hev.” 

Heaven bites her lower lip, choosing to ignore the blue-brown eyes that drop to her mouth before looking back up at her and shaking his hand. “Okay. Yeah.” The pair slowly pull their hands apart, Heaven shivers as she feels the calluses on his palm slide across her hand. “As my friend, can I ask you something?”

“Anything.”

“Is,” the girl rolls her eyes to the ceiling, releasing a heavy sigh. “Is she done? You saw it, and you obviously know more than me…is that something she can keep playing with her knee like that?”

He can’t bring himself to dash the hope she was clearly harboring on the behalf of Tashi but the girl’s recovery is…unlikely. Art tucks his hands in his pockets, tilting his head as he chooses his words carefully. “Tashi’s strong, and really fucking good, if anyone is going to recover from that kind of injury, it’s her.”

“So…no.” Heaven sits down on Tashi’s bed, staring forward at the wall that’s littered with pictures of some of the best tennis players in the world. A shaky breath leaves her as she stares at the professional posters, accompanied by the posters Adidas had made with Tashi on them. 

“You’re a really good girlfriend.” Art whispers.

“I cheated on her with you. I’m pretty much the worst girlfriend ever.”

“No, I mean, you’re really invested in her. In the thing she loves, like you care about tennis the same way we do, f-for her.” 

Heaven smiles softly to herself, grabbing Tashi’s pillow and hugging it to her body. “I fell in love with Tashi watching her play tennis. Just like everyone else does.” she jokes, poking Art’s leg with her toe. “When I’m watching her, it’s like I’m getting to witness something. It’s…corny but tennis is her calling. She goes to some other little world when she’s playing, and, even though I’m not a tennis player, she takes me with her. It’s this feeling of closeness that I can’t get anywhere else, you know?” Or at least, nowhere else I’m willing to talk about.

He does know. Art does know exactly what she’s talking about. He felt it. Once, when he and Patrick sat and watched Tashi play for the first time. It’s an all encompassing feeling. He was so caught up in watching her every move that he hadn’t looked anywhere but at Tashi. If he’d just looked three rows in front of him he’d have seen the girl in front of him now. 

The second time, the feeling was more intense, more of a sensation than a mere feeling. It was when he was sitting in an empty theater, watching Heaven dance, just for him. Art had never felt the things he’d felt before. He’d never had the thoughts he thought. He’d held his breath for the entire minute and 26 seconds that she gave him. He sat on the edge of the red, fabric auditorium seat, scared to blink and get left behind. He wanted to capture the feeling and keep it forever. And he has. He’s kept it. And everytime she gives him another taste, a smile, a kiss, a laugh, a touch, he goes back to being alone in the theater, experiencing euphoria for the very first time. 

If that’s the feeling Tashi gives Heaven, then he’s very jealous. And he wants it.

And that’s another new feeling the girls introduced him to. He’d never wanted something like her…or…uh them. 

Jealousy. Longing. Needing. 

Art knew exactly what Patrick was talking about when he said he liked seeing him fired up about something. Because, as much as he loves tennis, it didn’t make his blood boil. It didn’t make his stomach muscles clench with intensity. He didn’t feel that satisfying nervous burn. Not until…

Art needs to test a theory.

He scratches the back of his head, looking down at his sneakers before clearing his throat. “Uh, so, Hev, I’ve got a match this afternoon. And, I know things are weird right now, so you might think I’m a dick for even asking-”

“Arthur.”

“Come watch me play.” He blurts. Heaven’s eyes widen and he finds himself taking a tentative step forward as if he was trying to soothe a spooked horse. “I don’t know, I just figured…I mean, you might miss watching someone play, with Tashi taking a break and Patrick being…himself.” When Heaven continues to look unsure, Art puts himself out there again, trying to entice her the way he knows how. He moves to stand in front of where she’s seated on the bed, crouching to be just below her level. “When I win it will be for you. I’d like you to be there.” Art carefully tucks a piece of her hair behind her ear, before grabbing her chin between his thumb and index finger, moving her face around playfully. “As a friend.”

As a friend. That’s exactly what Heaven repeats to herself, over and over when she carries her bags over to the tennis courts, placing one foot onto the metal bleacher and opting to sit in the seats down on the front to rows. Just so she can see better. And it’ll be easier to slip out before the match is over. Besides, she couldn’t bring herself to sit with the women’s tennis players towards the top. All she could think of when she saw them was that it should have been one of their legs cracking instead of Tashi’s and it didn’t exactly make her feel like a great person. 

She slips into the seat and crosses her legs, struggling as she pushes her overnight bag under the low seat.

“Hey, let me help you.” A blonde girl crouches beside her, pushing along with Heaven and getting the back underneath. 

“Oh,” Heaven offers her a bright smile. “Thanks, I have to head back to my school after this so I have all my shit with me, didn’t think I was gonna come.”

“No problem,” the girl chirps, plopping down into the seat next to Heaven. “Sara. Myles’ girlfriend, he’s playing after this first match. Whose girlfriend are you?”

Tashi’s name is on the tip of her tongue. She swears it is. But the girl is clearly talking about the players that were starting to filter in, with their red shirts that Heaven could see fitting Art perfectly from her seat. His blond curls flopping as his head moves side to side, she knows he’s looking for her. Heaven gives a soft wave to catch his attention and can’t help but match his smile when he spots her, waving back. “I’m not dating a player.”

“Well these are girlfriend seats, so don’t let anyone else hear you say that.” Sara says lightly, pulling her shades down over her eyes. 

Heaven turns to look at her, tearing her eyes away from Art stretching. “What the hell are girlfriend seats?”

“They’re seats…where girlfriends sit?” The girl sits up to get a pixelated picture of her boyfriend on her razor. “You know, the players’ girls sit, so they can see them. No wonder I don’t recognize you, you’re a plant.”

“I’m Heaven, I don’t go here, I’m just watching my friend before I go back to UCLA.” 

“Oh, shit,” Sara’s eyes widen in realization. “You’re Donaldson’s girl right? Myles’ cousin Kyle, trust me I know the names kill me too, but he was saying how Donaldson brought his hot girlfriend out with them the other night and was dick trying to show off for her.” 

“Again, we’re friends, m’not his girl.”

“Hey, Hev!” Sara ducks her head, watching out of her peripheral as Art jogs over, racket in hand, pushing up onto the fence so he could be eye level with Heaven. “Match is about to start, kiss for good luck?” He grins, holding his racket handle out to her. He playfully pouts until she gives in, leaning forward and pressing her glossed lips to the handle, looking at Art through her lashes. The blond wets his bottom lip and pulls the racket back. “Eyes on me, okay?” 

“Whatever, just remember you promised me a win.” Heaven giggles, crossing her arms as she settles back into her seat. Art beams even wider, hopping down off of the fence and jogging backwards back to where the players sit. “And spit out your gum!”

Faintly, she could hear Art’s teammates reprimanding him for ‘making the rest of them look bad’ and she smiles to herself, bringing a hand up to play with her name chain.

“Girl.” Sara snorts.

“Just friends.”

“Yeah sure.” the blonde girl shrugs, pushing her shades back down. “Don’t tell me, tell Donaldson.”

Art delivers a win, as promised. It wasn’t hard, really. One thing Patrick had gotten right was that college kids weren’t really much competition. And maybe he had some very good motivation sitting out in the crowd with her eyes locked on him. So he showed off a little, served a little harder, made the other guy run a little bit more than necessary. He could always explain that away as wanting to impress his coach and any possible reps looking to endorse him. And sure, he might’ve looked over at her for each point he wrenched out of the poor guy from Temple’s hands but…well he didn’t have an excuse for that other than it gave him a rush knowing that she is sitting pretty, legs crossed, perched with the other girlfriends, watching him, rooting for him, breathing heavy for him. 

When matchpoint is declared his, Art smiles cockily, strolling up to the net and shaking hands with his opponent before making his way over to Heaven again, this time climbing completely over the fence, leaving behind his tennis bag on the opposite side of the court. This time she stands, catching him a little as he lands in the small space in front of her and the fence. “Well?” he pants, lifting his hat to adjust his hair before placing it back on his head. 

“Well, what? You want me to say congratulations?” Heaven grins, sweeping some sweat that dripped from his forehead off of his cheek. “Congratulations, Arthur.” she hums.

“Thank you.”

“Mhm.”

“Yeah,” Sarah calls from her seat, smiling smugly up at the pair. “Good job, Donaldson. Why don’t you try to pass some of that mojo to Myles, huh? Getting kinda tired of coming out to these things just to watch you play.”

“I’ve got a lucky charm, that’s all.” Art nudges Heaven, wrapping an arm around her waist so she doesn’t stumble too far away from him.

“Yeah, so, lucky, or the other guy sucks and Art is good-”

“No, I think you’re my lucky charm, don’t try to ruin it-” Art laughs, taking his hat off again, his messy blond hair falling all over as he places it on Heaven’s head, holding her to him as she squirms.

“Ew, Arthur, it's sweaty!”

“It’s the fruit of my labor, Hev, that win was for you!”

Sarah scoffs, shaking her head as she watches the pair, leaning away to avoid getting hit when Art lifts Heaven, swinging her to the opposite side of him to help her get to the steps before grabbing her bags. As she sees him guide her by her waist down the bleachers, both of them cheesing as they chat as if no one else was there and she realizes that Art is leaving the courts before his fellow teammates play, Sarah commends her own instincts.

And then she makes a note to herself to start saving the returning girlfriend seat next to hers for Heaven. The other girls were sort’ve bitches, anyway.

“So, I should head back.” Heaven leans back against the driver door of her car, clasping her hands together behind her. “But, this got my mind off of things for a little, so thank you.”

“It’s what friends are for.” Art laughs, stepping in front of her, hand behind his neck.

“Pft, you’re such a dick. Aren’t you supposed to be the nice one?”

“I am nice.” he smiles, rocking on his feet, feeling his chest tighten as Heaven bites her rose petal bottom lip again. His eyes soften as he stares down at her delicate features and thinks about how right things feel when they’re together. How he hasn’t felt this good in…ever. “So nice, I’m not gonna say what I want to say. I’m just gonna say,” he takes her hand gently, toying with her fingers, pushing her thumb with his own, “goodnight.”

Heaven’s lips part, and looking up into his eyes, how kindly he looks down at her. What she can see in them almost does it. She almost got lost, just like that. But a buzz in her jacket pocket has her grabbing her phone and the message has her taking a small step backward and placing her hand on her door handle. “Goodbye, Art.”

“One two three, one two three, and Peter please keep up with Heaven, Heaven a little less hatred on your face, thank you, two three and up, I want her in the air-” Madame Fontaine claps her hands to the pace of the movements she wants from her two leads, following them as they move across the floor. Heaven holds her breath as she’s lifted into the air for two counts before she’s slid down Peter’s body, draping herself across him romantically as he kneels to accommodate her. “Yes, that is exactly it. Now kiss.”

Heaven feels herself wince, squeezing her eyes shut as she feels Peter’s lips press against hers.

“Still doesn’t look good, Madame.” Fallon calls from her seat. 

“No, no it doesn’t, does it? You two, what’s the issue, tu veux m'humilier et me faire me suicider ou quoi?”

“No, Madame,” Heaven huffs, swatting Peter’s hand away from her waist. “We don’t want to humiliate you or make you kill yourself, I don’t understand why we have to do the version with the kiss, there are plenty of variations without it-”

“You understood her?” Peter squints at the girl next to him before huffing, “Fine, whatever, MacMillan intended for there to be passion between Romeo and Juliet, and you curl your lip up everytime I kiss you.”

“I don’t like doing it.” Heaven shrugs. “I’m a professional dancer, not a porn star, and I’m playing a 15 year old girl, I don’t know why any sane, adult audience would want to watch me lay on top and kiss a grown man and then kill myself to be with him-”

“We open tonight. We are doing the ballet as we rehearsed, you two will kiss and you will tolerate it. Practice if you must, pretend he’s someone else, take a shot before you do it, I don’t care.”

“Madame, we’re 19.”

“Oh please.” The older woman storms off, her assistant behind her and the two dancers are left side by side. 

“So…should we practice?”

“Absolutely fucking not, thank you very much.” Heaven pushes past Peter, snatching her dance bag from the floor. “You’re gonna practice until your knees bleed for the next hour and then you’re gonna soak in the athletic building so you’re actually ready for tonight and I’m gonna go…I don’t know, pray.” 

As Heaven storms away, dramatically slamming the theater door behind her, she can recognize she was in a bitchy mood. She felt like she had a lot of shit to be annoyed about and was frankly pissed to feel her world collapsing around her on the first night of her first college role in which she’s the fucking prima. 

First, she once again demonstrated to herself that she has absolutely no fucking self control when it comes to Art Donaldson, a truth that she’s learned about herself that really agitates her. She discovered this as she struggled into the routine of only responding to the blond every couple of days and found herself sitting up in the privacy of her own dorm, reading and rereading every message she sent, the bright light of her phone shining brightly on her shame.

Second, she still hadn’t heard from her boyfriend (ex?), Patrick. She’d watched a couple of his matches while she was on the treadmill at the gym and as he does, he wins the first two rounds only to lose in the third. He found time to get lazy in his tennis playing but failed to pick up his goddamn phone and call either of his girlfriends.

Which leads to the third thing haunting her. Tashi is fucking irritable as shit. Apparently, surgery does not agree with her, because Tashi had been crabby for the last few days. It started with the day of Art’s match when she’d sent her perfectly timed message. 'Did he win?' It was like she was taunting her. Like Tashi knew Heaven couldn't stay away. It pisses Heaven off even more that she was right. Then Tashi had moved on to venting about how Patrick was absolutely wasting his talent, how the fact that he’s not winning pisses her off even more now that she can’t play. How she’s going pro as soon as she gets the chance because if this injury told her anything, it was that there was no time to wait. How now that she’s got time on her hands, she’s been thinking more about her plan for her life and Heaven’s.

And lastly, the real kicker, what had Heaven gritting her teeth as she did bar warmups this morning, was that fucking phone call. The one from her mother that she received at 5:00am when she was stretching. The one where her mother said she wouldn’t be able to make it to her first night of her first ballet in college in which she’s the fucking prima. And when she expressed her disappointment, Beatrice responded ‘It’s just a school ballet, I’ll come to your first professional one.’ 

So, yep, she was in a shitty fucking mood. 

But she wouldn’t let all of that stop her debut as an adult dancer. She was going to be a pro, she was going to do it her way, even if the 5 seats she had reserved in the front row were empty. 

So, she sits at the vanity backstage, putting her hair into Juliet’s first hairstyle. She listens to music that reminds her of when she was 15 to get into the right headspace as she puts blush on her cheeks. She offers Peter a soft smile when she sees him in his costume and forces herself to try to look at him the right way. Because the things that are pissing her off don’t matter right now. Right now, all there is is Juliet.

It doesn’t matter if Heaven’s smile is fake as the lights shine down on her when she first prances her way onto the stage. Juliet’s smile is real. It’s meaningless if Heaven’s tears are real when she squints and sees that her mother’s seat is indeed empty, her stepfather attempting to send her a thumbs up to distract from the woman’s absence. And so what, if Heaven can’t go to her happy place as she solos because she sees both Patrick and Tashi’s seats are empty as well. As long as she can still breezily get through her motions, as long as it looks beautiful for the crowd, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t fucking matter.

And it definitely doesn’t matter, that as she came out of her fake balcony in her sleep gown to blow everyone’s minds with the most loving, fucking passionate pas de deux they’d ever seen, she accidentally caught eyes with Art in the audience, staring up at her intensely. 

So she doesn’t have to feel guilty that when she kissed Peter, she envisioned him with curly blond hair and heterochromatic eyes. Or the fact that Madame Fontaine told her when she stepped off stage to change into her next costume that it was the most romantic, realistic kiss she’d ever seen.

Does Art know he's stupid? Absolutely. He's never dared call himself intelligent. He didn't need the little voice that sounds like Patrick calling him pussywhipped. He knows. But, he still found himself on the highway, traveling at a breakneck speed, eyeing the bouquet of flowers that he has placed in the seat.

He'd known Heaven was serious about this whole friend thing. She's so good, and kind. And she cares so much about Tashi and Patrick. But Art knows he can treat her better. He's sure of it. Despite what he knows to be true, Art refuses to pressure her...anymore. He'd just rely on the fact that if they were supposed to be together like he believed they should be, they would be. Eventually. Soon. Hopefully.

So he came fully ready to play the dutiful friend. He was gonna stand politely by as Heaven leapt into Patrick's arms after the show. Art was gonna smile politely as she and Tashi shared kisses and exchanged giggles as they talked about inside jokes that they only understood. But then he got there. He'd been directed to the front where the two premier dancers families were arranged to sit and found three empty seats separating him from a man with peppered hair and smart looking glasses who had his own bouquet of flowers across his lap and a Chanel gift bag next to his feet. As he inches into his seat the man looks at him with a smile.

"You must be Patrick. I'm Heaven's stepfather, Luca Whitlock, I'm sorry I missed you at her birthday." The older man holds his hand out to Art with a kind smile. "Nice to meet you."

Art offers him his own awkward grin, accepting the tight squeeze of the man's hand. "Uh, no, I'm Heaven's friend, Art. It's really nice to meet you Mr. Whitlock."

"You as well." The man lifts his wrist to check his watch. "Show is meant to start in a few minutes, hopefully he will be here shortly. Stellina won't like for her boyfriend to be late.

Art shifts uncomfortably again, checking his phone. Patrick had reached out to him a couple days after Tashi's injuries. Mostly to make insults thinly veiled as jokes, clearly still pissed that he yelled at him. Art responded with short, one worded messages.

It's the least they'd ever spoken since they'd met.

The guilt he feels for his part in this fight they were having is very real. But it was currently heavily outweighed by his annoyance at the fact that his friend was seemingly punishing Heaven by not showing up for her big night. He knew Patrick didn't deserve her, and he was only proving his point.

"Is Tashi with Mrs. Whitlock or..."

"Oh, my, my wife couldn't make it. And Tashi is still...healing. Her mother called right before I was supposed to pick her up."

Oh. "Oh."

As much as he's glad he could be here for Heaven, he knows that Tashi and her mother being there would mean more. His heart aches for her as he settles back into his seat and the lights dim. The pain he feels for her only intensifies when he sees her step out onto the stage. She's beautiful. The perfect Juliet. If anyone would make a man fall in love within a few glances, ready to die at the thought of not being with her, Heaven would be it.

Her eyes are sad as she eyes the empty seats, using them as a tragic point of focus as she completes her expert turns. Behind him he could hear people whispering about how gorgeous the girl playing Juliet was, how talented she is. All Art can think is that they have no idea. They don't know how she's managing to be so elegant, so beautiful, so perfect, even as she's in the type of pain she's in.

Art would do anything to bring the light back into her eyes so they would shine the way the rest of her was.

He loves her.

He knows it. He feels it as her eyes finally make their way to his seat and her smile is a little more real. A little bit of light slips back into her eyes. She dances even more beautifully, more genuinely than before. And his mind is filled with the same thought.

Yes baby, that's right. Eyes on me. I'll make it better. I'll make you happy.

And he means it. Friends or not. Lovers or not.

It's on Heaven's first night of her first ballet in college where she's the fucking prima ballerina that Art makes a vow to himself.

He was gonna dedicate himself to Heaven Whitlock's happiness. No matter what that meant.

3 Years Later (California)(Age: 22):

Tashi shakes her head to herself as she watches Art pace in the kitchen. She brings her coffee to her lips, blowing at the smoke slowly as she observes him from the couch, taking a small sip before setting the mug loudly on the glass coffee table. She rolls her eyes when he doesn’t stop his steadily paced steps across the floor.  “You good?”

The blond finally pauses to look at her, jaw clenching and unclenching before he opens his mouth to speak. “This is just different, you know?”

“How? It’s still tennis.” 

“It’s pros, Tashi, I’m just nervous.” Art says, running his hand through his blond curls. “These guys are good.”

“You’re fucking good.” She asserts, crossing her arms. “Look, I can’t make you believe in yourself. If you can’t do this, please, let me know now, because I need to know if you’re not going to make this happen. We have a deal.” 

Art sighs, planting his hands down on the counter, staring down at the scattered marble with a frown as he tries to get out of his head. Suddenly, he feels a hand slide across his back and an envelope lands on the counter between his hands, into his line of sight.

“Something for you to consider while you decide if you’re gonna fuckin’ play like I know you can.”

With that, Tashi storms out, heels clicking on the hotel room floor and the door beeping as it slams shut behind her. Art stares down at the envelope, reading and rereading the name of the sender.His heart both clenches and races as he thinks about what the 4 little words on the small, insignificant piece of paper could mean for him. How those 4 words and whatever they’re hiding behind them will ruin his life. 

The Paris Opera Ballet

[pupkashi]

time

gojo will always make sure you’re taken care of

a/n: inspired by the saying “time will pass anyways” this is also me telling everyone that it’s okay to choose fun and relaxation sometimes <3 don’t feel guilty about it when you do :] this is very self indulgent and i will be rereading this once the semester starts up again :P

wordcount: 909

masterlist

the exhaustion behind your eyes was evident as you rubbed them, yawning and glancing at the clock.

12:37 am

you began to do the math in your head, if you studied until 3 then woke up at 8 you’d get a good amount of sleep and get all day tomorrow to study!

just as you were about to dive back into your studies, a knock caused you to glance at your front door, heart racing as you cautiously stepped closer. you could feel your heart beating in your chest as you neared the door, finally getting the courage to look through the peep hole.

a wave of relief washed through your body as you saw the mop of white hair, unlocking the door and staring at your boyfriend.

“what are you doing here so late?!” you scold him quietly, moving to the side and letting him into your apartment.

“oh cmon sweets we both know you weren’t asleep anyway” he retorts, pressing a kiss to your forehead before walking next to you, settling on the couch and grabbing your work, “still studying?”

you nod as you sit next to him, grabbing your work from him and placing it in your lap.

“shouldn’t you get some rest? or leave your apartment? it’s been like two days” he mumbles, throwing his head back before looking at you again.

“satoru i have to pass this final” you huff, “i have to study in order to pass” your tone is sharp and you almost feel bad for how mean you sound.

gojo only smiled at you. he knew you’d been studying practically all day. he knew you’d been studying all day yesterday as well.

“you studied for two days straight sweetheart” he pouted, already grabbing your work back from you and holding up to where you could t reach it, “let’s spend time having fun!” there’s a wide smile on his face.

“satoru!” you squeal, trying to grab your things to no avail, giving up with a frown on your face and furrowed brows.

“i have to take this time to study! i don’t have time to have fun!” you’re already starting to feel stressed thinking of your time constraints when satoru is grabbing you and pulling you into his lap, holding you tightly against his chest.

“time will pass no matter what you do” his voice is calm and there’s no playful tone behind it, “so how about you spend a couple hours relaxing and having fun, rather than studying things with an exhausted mind that isn’t gonna stick anyway?”

“who said they won’t stick?” you fight back, he only looks at you with a small smile.

“look me in the eyes and tell me what you were just studying” a beat of silence and a couple nonsense words leave your mouth, “see?”

you let out a small sigh, letting yourself relax in your lovers hold. satoru is there to urge you to shower, telling you it would help you relax, handing you a shirt of his he brought for that very reason.

it’s 30 minutes and a hot shower later that you’re walking into your living room with a much less exhausted and stressed look on your face, snacks on the coffee table and hot chocolate with marshmallows in matching mugs.

“we can watch Hell’s Kitchen and snack until we fall asleep!” satoru smiles widely, patting the spot next to him enthusiastically.

while you hate to admit when your boyfriend is right, he absolutely had a point.

you were gonna study for hours more, only to be utterly exhausted the next morning and not be able to recall half the things you’d read. instead you were laughing with your favorite person in the world, happily munching on your favorite snacks and melting into his side.

you only made it 10 minutes into the second episode, sound asleep on satoru’s chest when he looked down at you. there’s a small smile playing on his lips, his fingers ghosting over your back as he debates waking you to move to your bed.

he takes a moment to just admire you.

your hair still slightly wet, the smell on your shampoo and body wash filling his nose, there’s dark circles under your eyes. you were perfect.

‘i love you’ he thinks to himself, ‘i love you more than i can ever put into words.’

he loves you so much, he lets his arms go numb after 20 minutes of not moving, your figure still sound asleep. he loves you so much, that when you do stir, he’s coaxing you gently, picking you up and carrying you to bed, tucking you and letting you drift to sleep again.

he loves you so much he’s cleaning up your living room, turning off the tv and throwing away wrappers and washing your dishes. he’s sweeping the floor and whipping out the mop, hurrying so he could join you in bed. he’s setting alarms so the two of you don’t oversleep, knowing you’d still want to spend the day studying,

he loves you so much, he’s tiptoeing into your room, quietly getting into bed with you and moving your hair from your face. he lets you gravitate towards him, mumbling something when you finally feel his arm lay over your waist.

“gnight toru” you manage out, eyes still closed before you’re back to sleep.

“goodnight my hard worker” he smiles, kissing you gently before letting himself fall asleep.

taglist (send an ask to be added!) : @chilichopsticks @anime-for-the-sleepless @4sat0ruu @luna0713hunter @safaia-47 @nanamikentoseyebags

[hoseokslefteyebrow]

002

Pairing : Miguel O' Hara X Reader

Genre : fluff, tiniest twinge of angst

Summary : Miguel's not very happy when he finds out you've walked home by yourself last night(morning)?

Wordcount: 1.3k

[ A/N: Here's pt.2 : D. I've decided I'm making this a little connected one shots book.]

Miguel O'Hara Masterlist

" You didn't text me when you got home last night." Miguel suddenly spoke, breaking the comfortable silence that was between the two of you.

Yesterday, you had been taking care of him as he was sick, pampering him a little extra because he deserves it. The two of you had eventually fallen asleep, with you waking up around 3 in the morning and heading back home.

You look up from where you're seated on his desk chair, having been busy playing Good Pizza, Great Pizza on your phone. His back is turned to you, eyes focused on the different screens showcasing the Spiderverse and whatever else.

" Oh, uh, yeah. I must've forgotten. I was so tired, my head went straight for my pillow once I got home." You shrug.

He hums in understanding, although he's a little curious. Who dropped you off last night? He's made it very clear before that he doesn't want you to walk home by yourself at the ungodly hours, no matter how short the walk to your house is. You're the last person he has in his universe (and outside of it, for that matter.) The only person who knows him better than anyone. He'd be damned if something were to happen to you. The thought of it already sets him on edge.

" Who brought you home?"

" Oh, uh, I did-"

" What?" Now he turns to look at you, a displeased look in his eyes.

" What? Everyone was asleep." You shrug.

You turn to look at your phone again, wanting to avoid the look in his eyes. He whisks the device from your grip as you do so, setting it aside on his desk. It's still whitin your reach. When you look up at him again, he's got his arms crossed, a strict look his face.

" I hope you know that I would've thrown whatever's in my reach if you were any of the other spiders. " He points out.

You roll your eyes.

" What, you give them bedtimes too? I can take care of myself. You've taught me enough self defense by now. I know how to handle myself." You huff.

He's aware how you dislike with how careful he's often being.

" I know you can, but you also know why I'm so careful with you. Just wake me up next time you're leaving early in the morning."

" While you're sick? No. Besides, you're barely resting as it is, I'm not waking you the rare times you're asleep." You point out.

You get up from his desk chair, stepping closer to him as you unfold his arms, taking one of his hands in yours.

" Stop worrying about me so much. I'm fine. Take a little more care of yourself maybe though. For me?" You ask him.

He sighs, eyes showcasing emotions he usually hides.

" Just stay over if you don't want to wake me up. We fall asleep together anyway, We can wake up together too."

He's not looking you in the eyes as he speaks, eyes on your joined hands, admiring the size difference. You're not looking at his face either, understanding how he feels. He's glad you're not looking at him, his cheeks having gotten the faintest of pink. It scares him how much he likes the idea of waking up with you.

" I guess we can do that. If it makes you feel better." You hum.

A flash of surprise passes through his eyes, but it's not caught by you. It's not everyday your crush says yes.

However, your sweet moment is broken up when the sound of the door is heard, and so Miguel steps away from you. You give him a small smile before picking up your phone again.

" Oh, Hey Y/N. Since when are you here?" Jessica asks as she steps in the room.

" Uhh, a while? No idea. Speaking of time, I gotta go. My shift starts soon." You say, suddenly realizing the time.

Miguel wordlessly lets the platform go down, but you don't have the patience to deal with that.

" Don't jum-" He sighs as you do so anyway, landing with a loud slam on your knees.

This isn't the first time you've done this, and most probably not the last.

" I don't have the patience for that wacky thing. Anyway, see you around. Maybe I'll be back later, maybe not. Bye!" You tell him with a smile, turning to the exit.

You greet Jessica on your way out, giving her a quick hug before finally leaving.

Jessica looks after your form as you leave, before turning to Miguel with a knowing smile. Miguel ignores the look in her face, instead getting straight down to business.

" How'd it go?" He asks her.

" Well, the anomaly is caught. He's stuck with the other anomalies downstairs. " She tells him.

He nods, turning around to face the screen again.

" Good." 

She knows it's his way if dismissing her.

" Soo, you and Y/N?" She asks suddenly.

Miguel doesn't even glance at her as he responds.

" What about it?" 

" Your feelings for her are pretty obvious. You should ask her out." She suggests.

He glances at her with a sigh.

" Not obvious enough for her to notice." He murmurs in response.

She still heard it either way.

" That's only because she's in love with you too. You should ask her out. She's a lovely woman." 

" No. I can't treat her the way she deserves. She deserves better than me." 

" Maybe. But I doubt she wants anyone else. Just think about it a little more. Y/N is sweet, if you don't make up your mind soon, there's a good chance someone else will ask her eventually. " She points out.

" Yeah, well, we'll see about that." 

He's aware he's close with you. Too close. No one would appreciate having a girlfriend who's got a best friend who's constantly at her heel.

The sound of the door opening suddenly sounds again, and you suddenly come running back in.

" Hey, sorry, forgot my jacket." You puff out.

Miguel turns to you right away. He glances at his desk chair, where your jacket is indeed still hanging on it's back. He picks it up wordlessly to throw it at you. 

You catch it.

" Thanks!" You call again, before leaving.

A teeny tiny smile graces his lips at your behavior. God, he's smitten for you.

" How do the youngsters refer to you again? I think it was whipped. You are 'whipped' Miguel." Jessica smiles.

Miguel barely huffs at her, instead turning around and pushing a button for the platform to go up again.

" Sure. Do you have something better to do or should I see if there's something to do for you here in the building?" He suggests as he goes up.

" No, I'm good. Say hi to Y/N when she comes back in a few hours." She laughs as she heads out.

Miguel shakes his head, putting it in his hands for a moment before finishing back on the task at hand.

' My feelings aren't obvious.'

003

Taglist;

@adamsloverboy

[jybyls]

Smoking together || V.C

Masterlist

Synopsis: Your girlfriend texted you to come over, and you both ended up quite intoxicated.

Warnings: Weed, mentions of sex but no smut, and slight mention of school shooting. That's all I think

Words: 500 ~

- 📜🎧🍂 -

Vads <3

Vada: Babe 9:02 am

Vada: Baby 9:02 am

Vada: Lovelovelove 9:03 am

Vada: Princessprincessprincessprincess 9:04 am

Vada: Are you awake ??? 9:05 am

I woke up to my phone buzzing under my hand. Before even checking who's spamming me, I already know it's my girlfriend, Vada. I slowly opened my eyes and unlocked my phone, groaning at the brightness of my screen. That's when I realised my phone was still buzzing, which meant Vada hadn't stopped texting me.

Vada: Are you awake ??? 9:05 am

Vada: Can you come over ?? 9:06 am

Vada: Like now ? 9:06 am

Vada: Pretty please 9:07 am

You: Hi vads 9:08 am

Vada: Hiiiii ! 9:08 am

Vada: Are you okay ? Can you come over pls ? 9:09 am

You: Omw love 9:11 am

Vada: Love you ❤️ 9:11 am

You: Love you too shithead ❤️ 9:12 am

I didn't ask why she wanted me over because since the shooting, we spend all our time together. Actually, most of the time, we're at Mia's to keep her company. We usually spend nights at each other's, but yesterday, my mom needed me for the night, so I knew that as soon as Vada woke up, she'd want me around. And so do I.

We lived pretty close to each other so 10 minutes later I was in front of her door.

Vads <3

You: I'm here 9:22 am

Vada: Come in the doors open 9:21 am

Vada: My parents are not here 9:21 am

I went straight to her room, knowing she'll be there waiting for me. As soon as I stepped inside her room, she ran up to hug me, making both of us fall. I winced in pain, but this dumbass was just laughing.

“Good morning, baby.” She kissed my cheek before getting up, still giggling. “Morning, Vads.” She gave me a hand to help me out. I basically flew when she pulled me up.

Shit is this kid strong.

Our noses were touching, her hands on my hips squeezing me. Mines were playing with her baby hair on the back of her neck.

“Hi.” I said, smiling like an idiot, my morning voice still hitting a little. “Hello.” she answered with the goofiest smile on. I didn't even have the time to say anything else that I was pushed on her bed with her jumping next to me, a joint and a lighter in her hands.

“Wanna smoke ?”

“Hell yeah.”

2 hours later

“Hey, baby ?” Vada called out for me. We're currently still in her room, high as fuck, as we're doing and saying the most random shit ever. Now the thing is about high Vada is that she becomes hornier that she already is, not that I'm complaining. I actully love it.

“Yes, love ?” She moved to hove over me, legs on each side of me.

“Wanna fuck ?”

“Fuck, yeah !”

After that, she immediately started kissing me, and her hands were already under my shirt, squeezing my covered breasts.

I just know we're not stopping any soon.

- 📜🎧🍂 -

Also wrote this like 5 months ago in class cause I was bored :))

Have a good day/night. Love your cute lil ass <33

[clarisse0o]

Camp Wiegman-Part 12

Lucy Bronze x Ona Batlle

Alternative Universe : Military School

Word : 6k

Masterlist

———————————————————————

Tuesday, November 3; 6:15 AM - Ona and Alexia's room.

I stand straight as a rod beside my bed. Bronze has just entered. I’m glad I haven’t lost my morning routine. I didn’t face any difficulty except that waking up was hard and abrupt due to the alarm. Luckily, my day of rest yesterday helped me recover and find motivation again. The disagreement with Bronze was quickly forgotten. I woke up alone. She had let me sleep while she went back to work. I found out when she returned just before noon to have lunch with Engen and me. She wanted us to eat before the midday bell. At least she spared me the rush hour. After that, she allowed me to stay in her room for the rest of the day as long as I didn't venture out. I promised it wasn’t my intention. I once risked it, and it didn’t end well for me. I just wanted to keep busy with movies, which I did until dinner time. I had to stop to eat with the two instructors, as agreed with Bronze. It was hard to change her mind. I was disappointed to end the day by returning to my room. I enjoyed hiding in her room. It had become my den, isolating me from the world. Needless to say, I was worried about reintegrating with the students. Bronze accompanied me to discreetly help me bring back my things. All it took was stepping into my room for any unease to vanish, thanks to Alexia. She welcomed me like a little whirlwind, not wanting to let go. It seems she eagerly awaited my return. Bronze had kept her updated regularly, but it didn’t stop her from worrying and missing me. Today, I return to the real world. Classes resume at eight. I have a knot in my stomach just thinking about it. I still don’t feel ready to return, but I have no choice. I show no signs of distress and patiently wait for Bronze to finish her inspection. It’s almost strange seeing her so impassive and expressionless again. It wasn’t like that in her room.

You can go.

Alexia doesn’t hesitate to head to the exit. I follow, but Bronze stops me by holding my arm. I turn to face her.

How are you feeling?

Better... No more fever, no nausea. I don't have much muscle pain either... I replied.

So, are you ready?

Uh-huh. I don't have a choice anyway.

Good.

I look at her attentively, squinting slightly. She’s not like usual. I don’t know what’s different, but something seems off. There’s only one way to find out...

So, how’s my work after a week? Is it done properly, Commander? I teased.

The princess finally follows the rules; that’s good, she retorts without a hint of humor.

I frown. That’s not the response I expected. I thought she’d play along. I examine her more closely. Now that I pay attention, her eyes seem swollen. And she has visible dark circles.

Are you okay?

We recently had a discussion about friendship, Batlle. It didn’t end well, so stop trying to be friendly and go eat, she orders.

She’s clearly not herself. It’s been a long time since she called me by my last name. And for such a small matter. It’s not like I asked a personal question. She’s not well, and I can’t do anything about it. I let her go, feeling powerless. I stare at the door for a moment, completely frustrated. She just brushed me off.

Ona, you coming?

I pull myself together at my roommate's call. I expected her to be gone already. Well, whatever. Bronze is right after all. She’s not my friend. It’s not my place to worry about her, even though I do and would have liked to be there for her.

Yeah, sorry. I'm coming, I say, returning her smile.

Our relationship has evolved since she learned I’m a former junkie. I feel I can trust her. I’ve grown attached to her. She seems to feel the same. She keeps saying we need to make up for the lost time of this past week.

What did Bronze want? she asks.

Just checking if everything’s okay, I shrug. She’s just doing her job.

I see.

She smiles at me in a way I can’t quite describe. I don’t dwell on it. I’m eager to get to the cafeteria. I’ll see the others, and my appetite is back. This will be my first breakfast after a long week of abstaining. I intend to savor it. When we reach the table, everyone is happy to see me. They ask if I’m feeling better. It seems no one knows about my withdrawal except Alexia and Leah. Wiegman and the four educators in charge must have covered it up as a flu absence. At least I’m spared the cliché stories about my past and pitying looks. Everything goes well this new morning. I just have a lot of questions about Bronze, who completely ignored me when she passed our table. I hope it’s not my fault. I don’t see what I did wrong, except for that conversation the other night. She didn’t seem resentful yesterday. Amidst all this, time flies. It’s almost time to return to class. We walk through the hallways to our first lesson.

I’ll join you, I tell Alexia. I need to use the restroom.

As you wish, but hurry up. It’s almost time.

Yeah, I’ll be quick.

I leave her to enter the nearest restroom. I need to gather my thoughts for the start of this morning. I first use a stall, then wash my hands. I take the opportunity to splash water on my face. Why am I in such a state over something so minor? I feel weird, like I have a bad premonition. Damn responsible person. She annoys me by making me question so much. I hit the counter in frustration. I wipe my face and leave the restroom. I sigh, seeing the empty hallways. Great, now I’m late. Perfect for a return. I walk slowly and heavily toward my classroom. A few minutes won’t make a difference since I know I won’t be allowed in anyway. When I reach the door, I knock. It opens shortly after.

Miss Batlle makes her grand return and in style, the teacher remarks right away. You start well after more than a week of absence.

Sorry for being late.

Save your pretty words and go to the instructors’ office, will you?

Of course. I know the way! I retorted sarcastically.

What did I say? I wouldn’t be accepted. I reverse course to the office of Bronze and Engen, which I know very well. I had to do archiving with Bronze there on my first day before moving boxes upstairs. I knock on the already open door to announce my presence. It’s a large space where two desks face each other. There are several filing cabinets. Nothing exceptional. There are more than one such room on the first floor. Six to be exact. One for each instructor pair. Naturally, I’m assigned to my responsible person’s. I enter the room, and Engen looks up to greet me. She’s alone, which is strange. Bronze should be here.

Batlle, she calls, surprised. Already on the first day? What brings you here this time?

Late, I grumble, sitting on the chair in front of her desk.

Late? I saw you in the halls earlier. Did I allow you to sit?

Urgent need, I half-lied. I’m not standing until Bronze arrives. Especially since I just got back.

Bronze won’t be here today. I’ll handle you for the day.

What? I blurted out in surprise.

Is that a problem?

Now this is the last straw! She raises her head from her paper, arching an eyebrow. She’s not the problem. It’s Bronze’s absence. It’s a first! She’s never missed a day since I arrived.

Okay, what’s wrong with her? Is it me?

Excuse me? she frowns. What are you talking about?

Why is she absent?

She’s entitled to a day off, isn’t she? Especially after the week she had because of you. And why am I even telling you this? It’s none of your business.

I noticed she wasn’t well this morning...

I lower my head, feeling uneasy under Engen’s scrutiny. I have regrets and don’t even know why. Maybe I spoke too much when I hear her chuckle. I must look ridiculous. I bury my head in my collar, not daring to look at her.

I don’t know which of you two worries more about the other, she murmurs.

What?

Did I hear right? Bronze worries about me? Why would she? She was asking me to keep my distance this morning... So, she talks about me to Engen. This thought warms my heart.

It has nothing to do with you, Batlle. She just has a day off to rest from her week, she explains. Anyway, that’s the end of it. How many hours are you missing due to your refusal?

Two.

Well... she murmurs, thinking. Since she’s absent and she fell behind because of you... You have two hours to sort and alphabetize Bronze’s files, she says, pointing to my responsible person’s desk.

Bronze is more original with punishments.

Stop arguing, Batlle, and get to work.

Just as friendly as Bronze... I sigh and change places, settling into my manager's office chair. Engen looks at me strangely before a sly smile stretches across her lips. She doesn't ask me to move, surprisingly. She continues her work while I focus on the task she assigned me. I don't even know where to start given the number of files scattered on the desk. I don't ask for help and try to do my work without flinching. This place is literally changing me. Just a few days ago, I would never have accepted a punishment without complaining.

Tuesday, November 3; 6:45 PM - Cafeteria

I sit down at my seat, placing my tray on the table. My first instinct is to look at Bronze's table on the educators' side. She wasn't there all day. I know because I was late again this afternoon. Engen had to take care of me. I like her a lot, but Bronze is irreplaceable when it comes to creative punishments. I straighten up in my chair when I finally see her. She's there, at her table, with Engen! We are directly across from each other. It feels like our spots were meant to be. She talks to her colleague without acknowledging me. I hope Engen doesn't say anything. She noticed my remorse because she assured me all day that I had nothing to worry about. I let go, realizing I won't get any sign from her, and try to follow the conversation happening around the table.

"Seriously, it's you?" says Alba.

"You're really in trouble, girl ! They're looking for the culprit, and it looks bad according to the rumors!" adds Lotte.

"I don't care at all," says the one in question, who is none other than Leah.

"What did you do this time?" I ask, getting to the point.

"Oh, nothing very interesting. I just tagged the sign and the walls of the establishment."

"What!?"

"It's not just laps around the field you'll get this time," laughs Alexia. "What are you playing at, seriously? Are you trying to compete with Ona for the number of punishments or what?"

Without thinking, I stand up from my chair under the incomprehensible eyes of my friends. It's my only chance. Too bad if I regret it later. Hopefully, I won't feel bad in the meantime. I walk to the educators' area. I find myself between the two instructors and stare directly into Bronze's eyes. I know Engen is also looking at me, but she's not the one I'm interested in.

"It was me," I blurt out into the void.

"It was you what, Batlle?" Engen intervenes.

"The tags. I did them."

"What the—"

Bronze raised her hand to signal her colleague to be quiet. For the first time since this morning, her eyes land on me. Her green irises pierce through me, giving me goosebumps.

"Really?" she finally asks. "I leave you alone for one day, and you manage to do something like this? Why come forward only now?"

"To take responsibility for my actions. It would be stupid for someone else to face the consequences in my place," I respond confidently.

She looks me up and down. I really don't know if I made the right choice by accusing myself without reason. One thing is certain: it was the only way to get her attention.

"Very well. Go clear your tray," she orders. "I'll deal with you tonight, no matter what state you're in. And you won't even be able to complain tomorrow morning when you wake up."

I manage a smile. My plan worked! My God, it worked! I nod and backtrack to my table. I almost trot with impatience. I'm met with confused looks from everyone at the table.

"What just happened?" asks Alba.

"I pleaded Leah's case by accusing myself."

"What?!" Leah reacts. "But why did you do that? Besides, you're not even really in a state to—"

"Don't worry about it," I cut her off. "Be glad you won't get punished!"

I reassure her ass he knows about my situation regarding the withdrawal. I feel good for a first day, so it should be fine. I think I'm the only person who is eager to get a punishment from Commander Bronze.

"Later, guys."

I go to clear my tray where Bronze is already waiting at the end of the line. I feel her eyes on me the whole time; it's unsettling. Once I'm done, she turns her back to head towards the exit. I follow her without thinking. I take advantage of the silence to observe her. I'm glad to see she has regained her color since this morning. We pass by my room where she orders me to put on sportswear. The commander is back, and I'm almost happy about it. I hurry to change, and we head to the gym. I bite my lip to avoid complaining. I asked for this. It will help me get my muscles working again after lying in bed for a week. Leah will really owe me one for taking the blame for her! We wander through the corridors of the establishment, which are almost unfamiliar to me. I haven't had many sports classes as Bronze often punished me at the same time. We stop in front of a large door that she opens. She pushes me to discover the room. I take a step back, not seeing anything in the darkness. She prevents me from fleeing with an arm around my back and pushes me inside. I'm quickly trapped with her in the room. She turns on the lights to reveal the setting, leaving me speechless. My God, tell me I'm dreaming. We are in the climbing room. What is her goal? I turn to gauge my instructor. She smiles with a raised eyebrow.

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah. We're starting with this, and then we'll see."

Oh my God... I feel dizzy. I hate climbing. I look at the top. It's really high. There must be at least ten meters of height there!

"What do I have to do?" I ask to be sure.

"It's obvious, Ona. You're going to climb up there," she says, pointing to the top of the wall.

"Are you kidding me?!"

"Do I look like I'm joking?" she retorts. "Stop talking to complain, or I'll have worse in store for you later! You'll do the one at the back. I'll belay you."

"Belay me?"

"Yes, I'll hold you with a rope. I could very well let you climb alone, so be glad."

"Bronze... I can't... I'm afraid of heights," I admit.

"Not my problem," she says indifferently. "You should have thought about that before. Here, take this."

My throat tightens when she hands me a harness. She really has no pity. I imitate her and reluctantly put on the harness. We move to the back of the room to reach the last route. Damn... What mess have I gotten myself into this time? I'll never make it. I'm really afraid of heights and not just a little! Just being on a chair already scares me. I inspect the wall in front of me, covered in numerous holds. Just imagining myself up there makes me dizzy. I look to my left to see an insurmountable wall named Bronze.

"Sorry, but I really can't..."

"It's not negotiable, you should know that. Just don't look down and trust me. Come here."

She ties the loop of my harness with the route's rope. She does it with such ease. I can no longer escape. She gives it a sharp tug to check the knot's solidity. I'm starting to panic. Bronze seems so comfortable with any sport, but that's not my case. She finally takes the other end of the rope to attach it to a metal loop she ties to her harness.

"There, we're ready. You can start. I gave you the easiest route. The holds are big and easy to reach. »

I sigh as I face the climbing wall. The last time I climbed was back in high school, and I was far from being any good. I start to climb, using one handhold, then two, then three... and I'm already stuck. I'm less than a meter off the ground, and I don’t know where to put my foot next.

"To the right, Batlle," she directs me.

"That's way too far!"

"Of course not. Use your legs to climb, not just your hands. You’ll never make it otherwise."

"What kind of punishment is this, seriously?" I snap.

"Alright, enough complaining. Climb that damn wall now. We’re not leaving until you reach the top."

And I know she's serious. Bronze likes things to be finished. Especially punishments. There’s never been one that I’ve abandoned halfway. I place my foot on the hold she indicated and muster all my remaining strength.

"See, you can do it when you try."

I continue climbing higher and higher. I had to stop several times after making the mistake of looking down. Bronze had to reassure me and encourage me to keep going. I have no idea what time it is, but it’s definitely late. I struggle to grasp another hold, and finally, I reach the top! I let out a proud yell, which makes Bronze laugh. It’s the first time I’ve succeeded, and it’s all thanks to her. She made sure I didn’t give up. I sigh in relief.

"Can you lower me down now?"

"No."

"What do you mean, 'no'!?"

I wish I could see her face, just to know if she’s joking. Her voice doesn’t sound like she’s joking. Unfortunately, I can't verify it. I cling to the wall, trying not to let go.

"No. I’m not letting you down. Not yet."

"This isn’t funny! I’m really scared and can hardly hold on. Everything hurts!"

"I’ve got you. You’ll stay up there until you explain why you took the blame for something you didn’t do."

"Excuse me!? What makes you think that? I did it!"

"Those tags were done Sunday night, Ona. Last I checked, we spent the evening together. Besides, the drawings look like they were done by a kindergartener. It would be a disgrace for someone who practices art as a hobby. To top it off, we already found out who the culprit was just before dinner."

Damn it! She got me like a rookie. Here I am, stuck against this wall like an idiot. She brings me back to reality.

"So, Ona. Don’t mess with me and tell me the truth!"

I’m literally backed into a corner. I close my eyes and rest my head against the wall. I have no choice, I have to talk. My limbs are giving out, and my head is spinning. I’m trembling all over. I’ll lose my grip soon.

"I wanted to get your attention..."

"Get my attention?" she repeats, surprised. "Why?"

"You ignored me all day, and I noticed you weren’t doing well this morning... I was afraid it was because of me, even though Engen assured me otherwise."

"You can’t be serious, Ona? You got yourself accused of something so serious just to get to me!?"

"It seemed to be working until now..."

"You’re such an idiot!" she says bitterly. "But you’re brave, I’ll give you that. Alright, let go of the holds. I’ll lower you down."

"I can’t."

"Don’t be ridiculous. Let go!"

"I’m scared!"

She sighs as I cling tighter to the wall. I can’t help it; it’s stronger than me.

"Ona, there’s a reason I made you climb up there."

"Oh really?" I sneer bitterly.

"It’s a trust exercise. I need you to trust me, not just in climbing."

"Stupid exercise!"

I’m on the verge of a panic attack. I’m holding back tears that are welling up in my eyes.

"Ona, please, I won’t let you fall, I promise."

My trembling won’t stop. It’s an awful feeling. I close my eyes to fight against myself. I know I can trust her. I don’t know what I’m waiting for. I take a deep breath before letting go without thinking. I squeak as I swing back and forth, hitting the wall. She stabilizes me before slowly lowering me down. I force myself to open my eyes to see myself floating in the air. My heart is pounding with fear, but it’s not so bad after all. I’m relieved once my feet touch the ground. I collapse against the wall, trying to regain my composure. Bronze smiles at me and crouches down to untie my knot. She really got me this time. She knew it wasn’t me. She just wanted to corner me to make me talk. She surprises me by placing her hand on my forehead to check my temperature.

"You haven’t had any more episodes?"

"No, it was fine today..." I murmur.

"Hmm. Engen told me that you were late. Was that also to get my attention?" she teases.

"The first one wasn’t. Well... not intentionally. The second was to check if you were absent for the day."

She raises an eyebrow before bursting into laughter. It’s a genuine, pleasant laugh. She shakes her head before leaning against the other wall. It’s true it would’ve been smarter to choose the other wall. The climbing wall’s features hurt my back, but I’m too exhausted to move now. I watch her pull her legs up and wrap her arms around them. It’s a very childlike position for her. I savor the silence that follows. I realize I missed her presence today. It doesn’t stop me from feeling stupid for confessing my obsession with her. I watch her stare at an invisible point in front of her, looking completely absent. Several minutes pass before she speaks again.

« Why?"

« What do you mean, « why »? »

« Why did you want to get my attention? » she repeats, finally looking at me intently. « It’s really confusing. Just a week ago, you hated me. »

I lower my head, thinking. She's right. It is confusing given everything I’ve said to her. I don’t even know when my feelings changed. I nervously play with my fingers. Admitting my true feelings would reveal too much. I sigh as I look at the ceiling.

« You’re the only one who cares about me here. Well, no. You’re actually the only one who’s cared about me for years, I correct myself. I appreciate the attention you give me, even if it’s sometimes annoying to have you on my back. I’m sorry for getting so worked up the other night. I felt like everything I thought was wrong and was afraid you’d become cold again like in the beginning . »

« What exactly were you thinking? »

"Well... I thought you were only helping me because you were ordered to. That you were doing it professionally and not because you liked me. »

« Of course, I’m doing it professionally, but not just that, Ona. By accepting Wiegman’s offer, I volunteered to supervise you and enforce the rules. That’s all. The rest is from me. »

I feel remorse now. I lower my head to hide my embarrassment. I’ve been making a fuss over something that doesn’t exist. I suddenly feel really foolish.

« If I really didn’t care about you, I would have let them send you to a rehab center like Wiegman and your mother planned, she adds. I dissuaded them because I trusted you, and I was right to. »

« Thank you…"

« I’m not doing much. »

« Yes, more than you think. »

« Like what, for example? »

« You’re the only one who can stand up to me. You punish me without mercy and manage to make me comply with orders I would never have followed before... You’re also the only one who pushes me to succeed in what I undertake. You show that you trust me, and that reassures me », I conclude.

I’m a real idiot. She wants the best for me, and I keep digging myself deeper. I watch her as she remains silent. She seems lost in thought.

« You have a very contradictory personality, you know? »

« What do you mean? »

« You act like a tough girl who doesn’t care about anything and is afraid of nothing, but after spending time with you... I’ve discovered that you have a serious lack of self-confidence. My punishments have chipped away at your armor. »

I don’t respond. There’s nothing to say since she hit the nail on the head. Bronze is very observant. She just figured out that side of me without me wanting her to. I bite my lip.

« I wanted to thank you for what you did for me this week. »

« It’s normal. »

« I must admit it really pissed me off to see you so down this morning. You don’t hesitate to help me when I have issues, and I can’t even do anything for you. I thought about it so much that I went over every situation from last week, fearing I had done something wrong. »

I need to get this off my chest so she knows how I feel. I felt bad for her. I’m aware that our relationship is evolving, but I hope our attitudes won’t change. I really enjoy annoying her. It’s become my favorite pastime here. It’s fun, and I love that she takes care of me... Even if the punishments aren’t always great.

« I got dumped last night. »

I look at her in disbelief. I don’t know what surprises me more: the fact that she’s confiding something very personal or that she broke the rules. I had already asked her questions about herself, and she had kindly brushed me off.

« The commander dares to break rules? » I reply with humor. « And seriously, did someone actually want you?! »

« Of course they did! » she huffs, hitting me on the shoulder.

« Sorry, »I chuckled. « It was too tempting! »

I managed to get a small laugh out of her. She rests her head against the wall and closes her eyes. She really seems affected. I should have noticed this morning.

« He’s just an idiot. He doesn’t know what he’s missing. »

« Oh really?" she chuckles, looking at me.

« Absolutely. Even though you’re a super annoying commander... I imagine that outside these walls, you must be a nice person. I got a little glimpse of that this week. »

« I’ll remember those words. »

« Hey! That’s out of the question! I’m trying to cheer you up here! »

I managed to get her to laugh a little more. It’s nice to hear, and it reassures me at the same time.

« You say that, but you don’t even know what happened. For all you know, I could be the worst bitch. »

« Is that so?"

« I don’t think so. Only with you when you annoy me. »

« That’s mean. »

« Realistic. »

I smile at her response. I love having these casual, spontaneous conversations with her. I know it’s short-lived, so I’m enjoying it. As soon as we leave this room, I’ll have to deal with the commander again. She’s too obsessed with the rules to be any different.

« How long were you clean before last weekend? »

I sit up at this question. It seems like we’re in a moment of trust. I turn to face her and let my head rest against the wall. Her eyes are looking at me intently, very interested in my forthcoming answer. She’s taking a risk by asking me to open up... I sigh and play with a strand of my hair.

« I left the rehab center on September 18. One year after I entered. »

« Just a week before you came here? » she’s surprised.

« I guess my mother preferred to send me to this hole at the other end of the country rather than risk seeing me relapse, » I chuckle bitterly.

« I’m glad she did »

« Really? » I frown.  « I could have done without a military school. Just like the rehab, actually. It was really my worst experience. »

« Drugs are just a never-ending spiral once you taste them. I hope you won’t fall back into it. »

« It was just a rough patch, that’s all…"

I murmur this as I pull my knees to my chest. I’m very thoughtful about everything I’ve been through.

« «You complain about school, but if she hadn’t sent you here, I wouldn’t have met this cheeky kid you are. »

« That’s true, » I say with a shy smile. « You’re right. »

We enjoy the calming silence after all these emotions. It’s been a long time since I confided in anyone other than Mapi. She didn’t even have to drag it out of me. Mapi got the full story. She won, as she’s now the only one who knows everything. It’s no wonder she’s my best friend. She’s the only one I trust implicitly. I know she’ll never let me go, or she would have done so already.

« Still, I know about your love life before your first name. »

« In your dreams, I’m not telling you ».

« Why? You’ve already broken many rules tonight. One more or less…"

« You’ll find out sooner or later, but not tonight. You already know more than you should. »

I give up to keep the good mood going. I’m curious to know, but it will have to wait. I’ve tried to find out, but no one knows. It feels like a golden rule, but it seems ridiculous.

« If you don’t tell me, then tell me why such a beautiful girl is still single? »

« I don’t think t— »

« Oh come on », I interrupt. « You can talk about it to someone. And besides, who am I going to tell? I have no friends here. »

« No friends? What about the Putellas sisters or Leah and others? » she lists.

« Well, alright... I might have friends... Actually, I didn’t really want any attachments... I hate relationships; they always end up causing pain. Except Alexia didn’t get that memo... She can be very endearing. »

« We’re not so different after all, » she murmurs.

« Why do you say that? »

« I’ve been criticized for not being present enough and not investing enough in my relationships, she confesses. That weekend I couldn’t come home was the last straw. I’m not good with attachments either. I’m actually more of a feelings handicap who runs away at the first sign of trouble. »

« So I’m to blame."

"What? No, of course not! » she quickly responds. « It was planned that I wouldn’t come home the weekend you returned. Wiegman ordered me to keep an eye on you the whole week. I informed them of my absence well in advance. It was just that things were already bad before, and the news didn’t sit well. It’s in no way your fault, I assure you. »

I am to blame, even if she says otherwise. If she had returned, she might still be in a relationship. Can I be selfish for not wanting things to change? If none of this had happened, we wouldn’t be here sharing private conversations. I wouldn’t change it for anything in the world. I feel comfortable around her. I no longer feel exposed when confiding in her.

« Do you promise that everything we’ve talked about stays between us? » she asks.

« Of course », I promise. « And I’m not the type to break my promises. »

Time continues to pass. I hope it’s not too late. I’m dead tired, though. This first day has really worn me out. To think that just yesterday I spent the entire day in bed.

« I’m going to take you back to your room, she breaks the silence by standing up. You need to rest. »

« Do you work tomorrow? »

"I suppose I have no choice if I want you to behave. You might try to get my attention. »

« Oh, come on, I chuckle. »

I can tell she’ll bring up this story more than once. I accept her hand that helps me up. We put the equipment back in place before leaving our confessional space. Students are still hanging around in the hallways, which means it’s not yet past ten o’clock. Bronze accompanies me to my room, and I’m glad to see that it’s empty.

« Well then... Good night », she says.

« Thanks for everything, Bronze, » I reply softly.

« See you tomorrow, Batlle. »

I smile as she ruffles my hair. I don’t like the gesture, but coming from her, it doesn’t bother me. Once she’s gone, I head to the bathroom for a quick shower and put on my pajamas. I don’t waste any time sliding under the covers afterward. I’m physically and emotionally exhausted from the day, even though it’s better now. It was a special exchange, and I’m glad I’m the only one who knows about it. I get lost in my thoughts, but it doesn’t stop me from falling asleep effortlessly, with a smile on my lips.

[makncheese12]

Top Shelf pt. 3

Part 1, Part 2, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7

Masterlist

Summary: being the kid of a well-known book store owner was easy, so was running into famous people. But being book smart doesn’t make everyone people smart.

A/N: me and my friend were talking what to have happen next yesterday and we remembered how R is ‘book smart’ but not people smart and I kept coming up with ideas that made R look kind of stupid and she kept saying “yeah cause she’s book smart, don’t forget’ I would have posted it yesterday if we had gotten anywhere but we could stop laughing.

Warning: my attempt at being funny?, bad writing, angst at the end if you squint?

Word count - 3.3k

Credits: @novmoth (my friend from school who feeds into my delusions and gives me more ideas for this story🫶🏻)

Jenna Ortega x fem!reader

You didn’t text her.

You told yourself it was nerves that were getting to you, the way Lyle kept insisting you texted her before she changed her mind.

A week after the whole incident you decided it was too late and that he was right, maybe she would have forgotten about it.

You could always hide in the storage room if she ever came back and let Lyle take care of her while you drowned in your own self pity on the floor next to the masses of boxes.

But what if she hadn’t? What if she was waiting for your message the day she put her number in your phone and never got it or the entire week after?

What if you did text her and she texted you right back?

You had doubted it but there was still a string of hope left in you as you continued to contemplate it all.

Dru said you were stupid for not even texting a simple ‘hey’ just so the celebrity could at least have your number.

Mj, of course, has been referring to you as coward instead of your name since the day after you talked to Jenna which only made you feel worse.

Would they do it differently if they were in your position? Mj would, already having had texted her the minute she left. Dru would have deleted the number as soon as he got it, he only had eyes for Mj it seems these days, and Lyle he would have done the same as Mj but at least waited a few hours.

So, your situation was different from theirs you supposed.

“That’ll be thirteen fifty.” The man behind the counter states in a monotone voice as you pull your card out.

You decided to go to 7/11 to cheer yourself up a bit after being insulting by your group of friends the whole time while playing Apex, not caring that you were still in your pajamas.

The large slushie and snacks were certain to cheer you up and allow you to brag to the group about.

You grab your bag before quickly making your way out of the door and sliding your ear buds back in before your phone buzzes.

Lyle🗿:

My freezie senses are tingling.

You snort as you quickly begin typing.

You:

Stop stalking me on life 360 loser

Lyle🗿:

Did you get me one?🥺

Your smile grows at his disregard your statement completely and getting straight to the point.

You:

No, since I’m such a dingbat weirdo

Lyle🗿:

I take it back, please, I need a slushie🙏🏼I’ll even get on my knees and beg

You roll your eyes knowing he’d do it for free if you asked.

You:

The day DD chops off his musty hair is the day I’ll get you a slushie.

Another notification goes off and you click it.

Dru Danvers🤓☝🏼

Fuck you🖕🏼

You continue to smile and text, unbeknownst the the person who stops suddenly behind you and looks back.

Their eyes lingers on you for a moment before looking to the much larger man who lets out and sigh and nods begrudgingly, the person smiles before rushing after you.

Just before you could cross the street, they touch your shoulder making you stop and look back.

Your eyes are met with the brown ones you’ve been thinking about nonstop as a smile comes across both your faces.

You yank out your ear buds, something you seemed to do whenever it was her specifically when it came to Lyle or the others they would have to yank them out to get you to listen.

“Hey,” she says, her smile still on her face as she looks up to you. “Hey.” you reply before looking up to the man who stood a few feet behind her then back down to her.

“So I never got that text you promised me.” She says in a teasing tone and you tense, your mind racing through excuses to tell her.

You laugh awkwardly and guiltily before rubbing the back of your neck. “Yeah, sorry about that I’ve just been busy lately I never got the time.”

She looks at you for a moment, clearly seeing through the lie and you wondered if she actually could with the way she was looking at you.

“Or..” she says as she begins walking past you. “You just didn’t want to text me.” She says sending you a playful glare but there was also something else.

As she turns around to continue walking, both you and the man on her heels, a deep frown forms on her face.

She had hoped she was wrong.

“What? No,” you reply quickly catching up too and walking beside her. It was quite the opposite, actually.

“I really was just..” you reply before stopping yourself. It felt like you were lying to the girl but you weren’t, you were just trying to save yourself the embarrassment of the truth.

But then again that was lying, about how you felt.

She looked toward you, the look of hope in her eyes seemed to crack you and you let out a sigh of defeat. “I really was just letting my nerves get to me.”

Her eyebrow raised slightly and you let out a huff, not liking the way this girl just made you want to spill every truth.

“I guess I was nervous to text you. I only really text my friends so I didn’t really know what to say.” You mumble, thinking about what Mj would say to this.

She can’t even see you, just text something it’s not that hard

She let out a hum, satisfied with your new answer while also satisfied hers was wrong.

“A simple ‘hey’ isn’t that hard.” She says, amused by your embarrassment and you huff out once again. The statement proving Dru right, not that you’d ever tell him that.

“It’s not everyday I get asked for my number,” you mumble and Jenna feels a smirk creep onto her face.

Good; she thought to herself as her smirk only grows on her face at the thought she was probably one of the first. Or at least she thought she was with how you described it.

“How else was I meant to react?” You ask.

She lets out a snort. “You didn’t, your friend did actually.” You roll your eyes and chuckle.

Your eyes travel to across the street to see some people hiding and taking pictures while others do the same not so subtly.

You grimace slightly before turning your attention back to the girl, deciding to ignore the group.

You smile before pulling out your phone and typing quickly and a ding comes from her pocket as you put yours back.

She takes her phone and opens the text to see the unknown number and the simple ‘hey’ added to it which makes her scoff lightly. You feel your smile grow bigger at her reaction, finding yourself very amusing.

“Very funny.” She rolls her eyes before sending a text herself and pushing it back down into her pocket.

“Thank you, I try very hard.” You say, looking forward to see the snow begin to fall again. Your smile grows knowing it’ll be a good day tomorrow at the shop.

Your eyes travel to the moon before letting out a hum at the lack of stars in the sky.

“Why are you out so late?” You ask and she shrugs. “I just like to walk, you?” She asks turning slightly toward you.

“Would you believe me if I told you I’m a very active person?” You ask, of course you weren’t but who wouldn’t want to make themselves seem impressive.

She looks you up and down slowly before a smirk forms on her lips. You look down to see your black and white plaid pajamas with you zip up sweat shirt, the snacks and slurpee in your hand only proving you wrong further.

You looked more like you were late to school and didn’t want to get dressed than out for a late night run.

“Touché.” You mumble nodding before looking up to see her smiling. “Did you just get out of bed?” She asks and you nod.

“Yes, actually.” You reply.

“Oh, makes sense.” she mumbles with a small smile before it falls. You quickly notice her eyes traveling to the people taking pictures making the both of you frown.

How someone could get used to cameras always in their faces was unknown to the both of you.

The non stop flashing or the loud yelling from a director seemed overwhelming to you and it was for Jenna.

“So,” you say before beginning to walk again. “Wednesday Addams?” You ask and she sighs before nodding.

“I thought you’d figure it out sooner or later.” She groaned softly making you chuckle.

“I kind of already knew, just needed to be reminded.” You admitted making her stare up at you in wonder.

“You knew me but didn’t know me?” She asks, too seriously for your liking. “I mean, yeah I used to watch you when you were younger with my friends. Stuck in the middle I think they said?”

She groans louder this time, clearly embarrassed by the thought of the show she starred the main character of.

“But other than that no.” You finished laughing as she rubs her hands down her face.

“There are literally so many others and you just had to have seen only that one, great.” She mumbles and shakes her head.

Too say she was embarrassed was an understatement, she has so many shows and movies she’s been in recently that she completely forgot about the ones of her younger self.

Her acting was good but not as good as it was now so it wasn’t really great to hear you say what you said.

“You’ve had to have watched something else?” She’s pleading now, her hand resting on your forearm as you look down at her. You shake your head and laugh as she groans once again.

“I don’t watch much TV.” You admit once again making her sigh. “At least watch Scream or Wednesday,” she says, huffing slightly.

“Just so you see how much I’ve improved?” She asks looking up to you and you nod, deciding not to tell her you don’t really remember much of the older show.

“Sure, if it’ll make you feel better.” She let’s out a sigh of relief. “Thank you, oh my god that’s so embarrassing.” She says looking around and shaking her head.

You smile down at the girl who continues to look around New York, mesmerized by all the sights as you both continue to ignore the paparazzi flashes and cameras.

You thought she looked stunning as snow fell on her head and eyes shining with wonder, the street lights only helping her look better if she could.

Suddenly the man steps up and taps Jenna’s shoulder making you both look back to him.

He points to her watch and Jenna’s face falls as she nods to the man who takes another step back, waiting for her patiently.

She looks up to you and gives you a sort of sad smile. “Sorry, I have to go.” She says gesturing to the man who sent you both a glance before looking back to the paparazzi who kept their distance for some reason.

“It was fun talking to you though.” She says and you nod. “Totally.” you say, voice cracking lightly making her smile grow.

You stare at her for a moment to take in how stunning she was from the front angel instead of the side now.

Her freckles seemed to be much more noticeable up close, eyes darker without the light and a smile that makes your heart skip a beat.

“Text me, I mean it this time.” She raises her eyebrow and unfortunately walks toward the man while leaving a cold spot from your side which makes you realize how close she actually was walking.

You clear your throat this time and nod, “I will and you too, now that you have it.” You say watching her look over her shoulder as the man leads her away.

You smile as you watch her walk away, eyes linger on the last place you saw her before you turn around and begin walking in the direction of your apartment.

Once you do get back, you’re greeted with your cat rubbing against your leg making you place down your bag and drink before walking toward his food bowl and feed him.

Once that’s done you looked back to your half melted slushie that had sacrificed itself so you could talk to Jenna making you let out a happy sigh as you put it in your freezer.

A buzz is heard from your phone making you reach back and pull it out of your pocket, a smile immediately forming on your face at the sight.

xxx-xxx-xxxx

So, you were gonna make text first?

————

You hear you alarm go off making you groan as you pull the covers from off your head. You hadn’t realized how late it was while texting Jenna that you had just fallen asleep on your own and you were starting to regret it.

You grab the alarm clock before pressing off and looking at the time.

9:23.

Your eyes shoot open, suddenly wide awake as you practically shoot yourself out of bed, your cat jumping off with you as he runs away.

That’s twice in one month had you scared him like that.

You realize you don’t have time to shower as you pull clothes on and grab your keys before rushing out of the door and running as fast as you could down the stairs — ignoring your neighbors scolding— and onto the street.

You continue to run before yanking the glass door open to see your mom who sends you a unamused look and your father who looks disappointed.

“You’re late.” She states matter-of-factly as you pull your t-shirt of, now only in your sports bra as you grab the shirt. “And now your indecent!” She says, rushing over and pulling your sweat shirt down for you.

“Animal!” She says, hitting you with her rolled up magazine she grabbed from the shelf.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t see what time it was last night before going to bed!” You say, trying to block her hits.

“Playing your game all night again I assume.” she states instead of asks making you nod your head. A little white lie won’t hurt.

“You’re an adult in college, Y/N.” Your father sighs and stands up from sitting in his chair. “You shouldn’t still be going to so late because of a silly game.”

His scoldings were much gentler than your mothers which makes you smile lightly. “I know, I’m sorry.” You mumble and he only nods before going back to work.

You looked to your mother who raises her eyebrow at you as she walks passed you. “You have a lot to do today as a consequence now, so I suggest you get to work.” She says, tossing you the clip board of work you need to do which is much longer than normal.

You huff out quietly while reading over it, knowing this is what you get for being late.

————

The day was quiet and you had a few more customers than usual so it was sort of busy as you rush around helping people while doing your work as the sun began to slowly set.

It was easier than expected but definitely a little stressful.

You were glad your parents were making you do this now though. Getting used to it all before taking over after they retire.

You were in the middle of helping a customer when you see Lyle practically sprinting down the street and toward the shop making you knit your eye brows together.

“You’ll find it in the romance section, just over there by the bean bags.” You say with a smile and the boy nods and leaves you to go find her book.

You look back over to seem him yank open the door, eyes scanning over the library before they land on you.

He moves as quickly as he can without being loud in the quiet library to get to you.

“There you are! I’ve been looking all over for you! You weren’t answering your phone and you weren’t at your apartment.” He says in a whisper yell as he pulls you down a aisle.

You knit your eye brows further as he pulls out your phone from his back pocket. “I got it for you when I went to see where you were,” he says shoving it in your hands. “Open it!” He ushers you while you just stare at him.

“What?” You ask, looking down at the device in your hand making him groan out in anger.

“Check your damn Insta!” He demands making you further confused but begrudgingly open the app making your eyes go wide.

You first thing you see is the 99+ symbol on your notifications tab and over two thousand messages next to it.

You click your profile not to see you one hundred and thirty followers but seventy thousand.

You click on the photo of you and Lyle, he was pushing you in a shopping cart down the road along with the other pictures you all had taken while high that night. It had over ninty thousand likes.

“What?” You mutter and Lyle nods. Before pulling up his twitter on his phone. “It gets better!” He says a little too loudly making the person in the aisle glance over in annoyance.

You give him an apologetic smile before look to see the link he put to your face.

Celebrity Jenna Ortega seen with lovestruck mystery woman in New York City. Could this be the start of a sprouting love story? Click here to read more..

Under it showed a picture of you and Jenna on the street last night with her staring toward the city and you staring at her.

Your eyes go wide as you take his phone and continue to scroll seeing the many pictures the paparazzi took last night along with the picture you recognized to be on Lyles Instagram.

“And let’s not forget the picture I took of you while we were playing chess.” He says, snatching his phone and opening his own Instagram before showing you the picture he took now had one hundred fifty thousand likes.

“You’re like, known world-wide as Jenna’s girl or something.” He says, smile on his face as he scrolls through his twitter looking at all the stuff they had to say about you and Jenna.

“Woah,” you say, zoning out slightly as you take a seat on the little stool nearby made for children. “This is…”

“Sick? I know, right? You just became famous over night.” Lyle says as he too takes a seat next to you.

You were gonna say unsettling or strange but that works to you. You hadn’t expected it but you now realize you should have.

With the paparazzi last night and you being with Jenna it was expected.

But it hasn’t even been a fully twenty four hours yet? How exactly had it happened so quickly? Was she really this popular

So many questions swirled in your head as something suddenly comes to your realization.

The real question was how people found you so quickly on Insta? That was probably the unsettling part, it felt like you were part of a man hunt but instead of joining it like you preferred you were what they were hunting for.

You think about texting Jenna but she quickly beats you to it as if she had telepathic abilities.

You wouldn’t have been surprised if she told you she did though with the way her eyes seemed to capture you in some form of trap.

You knit your eyebrows together as you read the message and your stomach drops slightly.

Read next part here!

A/N: idk if this is angsty thinking about it now🥲

I’m also begging like Lyle on my knees that you guys send me request🧎🏽‍♀️my pea brain can only think but so much

[sunshine-theseus]

Always The One | Sam Kerr x Reader

word count: 2.6k

summary: you have a huge fight but she’ll always be the one for you.

Warnings: angst, sorta some fluff?

I’m not sure if it was because I was tired from my shift, or the fact I’d waited at the restaurant for over an hour and my girlfriend hadn’t bothered to show, that had my crying in Jessie’s apartment at 9:03pm on a Thursday night.

Jessie Fleming was possibly the sweetest person to ever walk the earth, and my closest friend.

“Still nothing from her?” she asks softly from the kitchen.

I let out a slow hum, indicating Sam had seemingly not noticed her girlfriend of 3 years was missing from their shared apartment on such an important date. Then I quickly check my phone again to make sure I haven’t unknowingly shut it off or somehow just missed a text or call from the woman.

“Well, you still have a spare uniform you left here a couple months ago if you need it for your shift tomorrow. But now, we eat ice cream and watch Fantastic Mr Fox until you fall asleep.” She plops down on the couch next to me with a pitying smile gracing her face.

“Wait. Before we do that.” I grab my purse from beside my feet and pull out two small items.

“Are you kidding me?! You’re fucking joking, you’re pulling my leg. Are you serious!” She rushes out questions before snatching the items to get a closer look.

“These are really real!?”

I chuckle at her, trying to stop the tears that are forming behind my eyes.

Sam and I had begun the IVF process a few months ago after some encouragement from Katrina, Sam’s national teammate, and I’d missed my period a few days ago so I took a test. I thought it would be a nice surprise for our anniversary. That, and the small black band with a simple diamond that sat snug in a red velvet box in my bag for three months now. But obviously she didn’t show, and I wasn’t sure what to do now.

“Yeah… they’re real. I wanted to propose and show her the test tonight. But, well, you know.” I start crying again before I can stop myself, and I’ve fallen asleep not long after Jessie starts playing with my hair.

~~~~~~~~~

Work the next day did not help take my mind off the events of last night. Being a paramedic was obviously a difficult job, but I hadn’t had this amount of bad luck on a shift in a long time, and the calls just seemed to keep getting worse.

Our first call was an elderly lady whose grandson had accidentally pushed her down her front steps, she’d hit her head pretty hard, and her knee was dislocated but it wasn’t anything we couldn’t fix and get her help for at the hospital.

Later in the day we’d gotten called to a collision on the A3 motorway, 2 women and their daughter in one car and a drunk man in a large truck. One of the mums had passed away before we’d gotten there, the other fractured her clavicle and some ribs and had a broken leg. The daughter had been knocked unconscious, a broken nose and arm and a fractured C5 and C6. The man got out with barely a scratch.

That’s when I had to take a break and try to call Sam. Holding the hand of the woman and her daughter became harder when I pictured Sam and our daughter in their place.

She didn’t answer. That call or the 3 others I made before I clocked off at 6pm, uniform stained with blood.

I’d zoned out the whole drive home. I wasn’t even sure I was heading home until I’d pulled into the driveway.

I also didn’t notice the now filled space where Sam’s car sat, or the dirty Airforce 1s by the front door that were missing when I’d left yesterday morning (I’d gone straight from my shift to the restaurant), and I didn’t notice the figure slouched on the couch watching the AFL game she’d clearly missed during training today, a beer already in hand.

I went straight to the shower to wash off the blood and cry. Then I got changed into an oversized jumper and shorts, avoiding any of Sam’s jumpers I’d usually curl up in after a hard day, sat on our bed and cried some more.

I don’t get to cry for too long before the bedroom door slams open and Sam beings to yell.

“When the fuck were you going to tell me!?” I just groan in response and cover my ears with a spare pillow, but she grabs it and stands in front of me, forcing me to look at her and the pregnancy test she held tight in her hands. I’d fucking forgot to throw the other ones out.

“When were you planning on fucking telling me this round had worked hmm? That we’re going to have a baby!?” I look my girlfriend in the eyes for the first time in 2 days.

“Last night. At the restaurant. You know… for our anniversary?” and I know it’s sick, but I found joy in the way her face dropped and realisation appears behind her eyes.

“Fuck Y/N! I’m so sorry, I’m so so sorry I forgot. How did I forget??”

“I don’t know how you forgot Sam. I sent you a text after you left for training. And another during my lunch break at work. And right as I was heading to the restaurant. And I called, got Jessie to remind you too, which I know she did. How the fuck did you forget Sam?” I get up from the bed and approach her.

“I don’t know, I got carried away hanging with Mills and Guro, but for fuck’s sake drop the attitude.”

Dro- drop the attitude!? She cannot be serious.

“What was that?”

“Drop the attitude Y/N. I’m sorry I forgot but the condescending tone is unnecessary, you’ve forgotten shit too.”

“Yeah! I have! Like if it’s my turn to cook dinner or if you have a physio appointment. Not a fucking anniversary Sam!”

“And this isn’t just about the anniversary anymore. I called you four times during work today and you didn’t pick up. You didn’t think calling four times during work meant I might really need to speak to you? Because when I held the hands of a little girl who had to say goodbye to one of her mum’s and the other mum who had to say goodbye to her wife all I could think of was you and you didn’t answer once. And then I see you for the first time in nearly 48 hours and the first thing you wanted to do was yell at me instead of calmly asking? It’s too much.”

I start running my hands through my hair and pacing around the room. This can’t be happening. What the fuck is happening here? Before I can think about much more, I grab my work bag and start packing a uniform and some clothes.

“Wh- what are you doing? Oh come on you’re not leaving over a silly argument.” We’d made our way to the front door by now.

“No! I’m not! I’m leaving because you can’t seem to see why I’m so fucking upset over any of this Sam. And the fact you got so ‘carried away hanging with Millie and Guro’ to forget your 3-year anniversary and just ignore all my calls. I was really excited to share the test with you, have a family, I’m not really sure what to do about that now. Oh, and here, was going to give this to you too.” I slam the small velvet box down on the counter by the door before grabbing my work boots and rushing to my car.

I hear the door slam behind me, but no footsteps follow, so I hop in and drive to Jessie’s apartment once again.

~~~~~

I’m laying between Jessie and Erin, the latter of whom Jessie had begged to come over to try and make me smile after I’d been crying non-stop, when there’s a banging on the door.

“Jessss! I know Y/n’s there please let me talk to her.” The familiar Australian accent makes me tear up again.

Erin gets up instead of Jessie and tells us she’ll handle Sam, send her away somehow.

3rd pov

Erin opens the door to a very dishevelled Sam Kerr, who’s eyes are red, hair a mess, having finally been let out of the low ponytail so she could run hands through it in a panic.

“Ez. What are you doing here? Where’s Jessie, and Y/n?”

“Sorry Sam, Y/n isn’t here. Jess ‘n’ I decided to have a sleepover so she can take me to training tomorrow because my car’s in the shop.”

“Erin come on I’m serious, she wouldn’t go anywhere else except here.”

“I’m sorry mate I haven’t heard from or seen her since our game against Man City when she had the day off.” Sam let’s out an angered sigh but accepts the idea that maybe her girlfriend had run off to one of the other girls, seeing as most of her friends were Sam’s teammates, either from Chelsea or The Matildas.

“Yeah ok, um, let me know if you hear anything yeah? I really need to talk to her.” Sam’s hand shakes as she pats Erin’s shoulder before turning away, getting back into her car to try Kyra’s or Ann-Katrin and Jess’, both friendships that seemed so unlikely to Sam, yet were some of her girlfriend’s closest friends.

1st pov

I let out a breath of relief when Erin returns to us without a certain striker trailing behind her.

“Maybe you should talk to her. She might fucking crash in the state she’s in.” the thought makes me feel bad for a moment, but she shouldn’t be allowed off that easily.

“No, she’s stupid but not that stupid. And she deserves to worry for a moment.” It was probably really mean, but I refuse to believe she doesn’t deserve a taste of her own medicine.

~~~~~

It takes me 2 more days of her calling before I start to really miss Sam, and decide to head back to our apartment just to see if she’s there, because Jessie told me how she hadn’t shown up to training on Yesterday and she wasn’t on the pitch as I watch Chelsea verse West Ham on Jessie’s tv.

As I walk through the door, the only thing I hear are the tiny meows of our cat Helen, who runs up to me to rub against my legs. I missed her.

But then I start to look around and realise what a mess the place is. Beer bottles are spread across every room and there are takeout containers that clearly hadn’t been put away since they arrived, sitting on the coffee table in the lounge room. I walk further down the hall but trip of some random pair of sneakers. No more than two steps after that, glass crunches under my boots and I frown when I see a photo of Sam with the FA Cup I had taken after their win last season. It was my favourite picture of her in her Chelsea kit.

“Sammy?! Where are you?” my voice echoes throughout the space as I creep towards the bedroom.

As I pry open the door, I’m met with a sight that both warms and squeezes my heart. Sam is covered in blankets, snoring softly. Her eyes are puffy and there are both fresh and old tear stains running down her cheeks. She looked strangely angelic, peaceful. Like the girl I’m in love with.

When I pull the blankets back, I see her hugging the teddy I got for her to take on international breaks when I couldn’t make it, doused in my perfume. I’d got it for her on our 6-month anniversary, and it didn’t take her long to buy me one for when she went away. The same one that is currently sitting on our windowsill, seeming very lonely.

She’s dressed in only a sports bra and some checkered boxers she’s been obsessed with sleeping in, but doesn’t seem to have changed in the past 2 days.

Her eyes blink open as I softly shake her away, but once she catches sight of me, she bolts up-right and scrambles to hug me.

“Hey Sammy.” I’m too tired to be angry at her anymore. I just miss her.

“I’m sorry, I’m so so so sorry I was so horrible to you. I don’t deserve to be forgiven but I’ll do anything to prove how sorry I am and how much I love you and this baby.” I then catch a glimpse of a ring, the ring, that is placed perfectly on her ring finger.

“Y- you’re wearing the ring?” and she doesn’t get a chance to reply before I’m kissing her.

“This doesn’t mean I forgive you! I’m still mad at how you treated me.” I pull back to tell her before she can reciprocate the kiss.

She doesn’t meet my eyes but nods. “I’m so sorry, I love you so much and I want to show you that and show you how sorry I am.”

“I expect you to get me every single thing I crave in the next nine months and give me cuddles whenever I ask.”

Before she can I agree I add. “And that’s only for not letting me give me whole speech about how much I love you before I propose. There’s a lot more ground to cover for the other shit.” But I smile and kiss her again.

“I would have said yes before you could talk any way. Oh! And I have a surprise for you too. I was going to give it to you on our anniversary too.”

Sam gets up and rushes to the drawers, pulling out a familiar box.

“No fucking way were you going to propose on the same day.” She simply pulls out the ring and holds it out to me.

“Will you be my wife? If you say no I might actually drop dead.” I cry before anything else. But then I catch her looking at me expectantly and I just nod before hugging her tight.

“I can’t wait to have a family with you.” I whisper in her ear.

“I bags being the fun mumma!”

“Nooo way!”

“Yuh huh! You’re going to be the safety conscious one. You literally make me renew my first aid with you every single year. I’m definitely the fun one.” I groan but hug her tight. I don’t know what I’d do without her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“SAM I’M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU ONCE THIS THING IS OUT OF ME HOW DID YOU CONVINCE ME TO DO THIS!?” I couldn’t tell you how long I’ve been in labour by now, but I’m sure Sam’s hand was about to break and everyone in the building could hear me swearing my head off.

“You’re almost there chickee, just a few more pushes I promse.”

“You said that last time and it was not just a few more pushes!”

Before either of us can say anything else I’m pushing again, and 6 minutes later, a baby’s cries fill the room, and Maeve Wren Kerr-Y/l/n joined her twin sister Charlie May Kerr/Y/l/n in their mothers arms.

When I look over at Sam, she’s smiling adoringly down at Charlie, and I see a tear run down her face.

“You’re so beautiful.” I reach to grab her hand while Maeve sleeps in my arms.

I don’t think I could love anyone, or anything more than I love Sam. In 8 months when we get married, I’ll look her in the eyes as we say ‘I do’ and I’ll know she was always going to be it for me. She’ll always be the one.

[itsgodepi]

If I lose my mind | Ch. 3

Series summary: When you're buried under a mountain of problems and can’t seem to catch a break, it might feel like you need a complete reset. But did it really have to come with a one-way ticket to a new dimension? Surely, a little problem-solving would’ve done the trick. Or, one day you go to sleep as a normal person and the next you wake up as a Formula One driver. You've never been a fan but isn't it like, one of the most exclusive sports? Pairing: CL16, LH44, CS55, DR3 x fem!reader Chapter: Previous | Next Word Count: 2.7k Also on AO3

The fact that you are playing some kind of reaction game with tennis balls right next to a Formula One car, does nothing but further consolidate the theory that this is not real. You must be dreaming. Why would you find yourself in this situation otherwise? It does not make sense. 

Not only had he made you change clothes yet again, dressing you up in a strange white jumpsuit filled with even more logos —your surname and country’s flag somehow branded on its hip—, he had also paraded you around the place for what felt like an hour. Cameras had followed you through it all, this time with no intention of recording from the sidelines but instead walking right in front of you as you tried to navigate the crowded place. 

“Feeling alright?” Nick queries when you fail to pick the third ball in a row, his eyes scanning your figure as if you were about to drop dead right that second “We can sit down if you need to” 

“No, no, it’s okay” you reassure him, willing your mind to concentrate on the game despite the way your mind is running “Let’s try again” 

Nick shakes his head in disbelief, stealing one last glance at you before he looks at something behind your back. “Don’t worry, it’s time anyway. I’ll go pick up everything so you can prepare” and with that, he is gone. 

Leaving you alone, like he already knows you won’t dare to run away.

He returns with his hands full not much later, one of the objects catching your attention straight away, a light blue helmet that you remember well. The helmet from yesterday, the one that man dressed in the bright orange jumpsuit had freed you from.  

Nick silently helps you with everything he brought: from a pair of earphones to a strange white piece of fabric that resembles a ski mask, and finally the helmet. When you hold it in your hands, the weight and smooth texture makes a familiar feeling arise from inside of you, a sudden streak of excitement that travels like thunders through your body. 

“Do I have to?” you whisper, head lowered and eyes fixed on the helmet as you try to shake that feeling., flashbacks from yesterday coming instead to play on your mind. 

Nick can only laugh at that, his eyebrows furrowing “What do you mean? Of course you have to!”   

And although that mocking response irks you, you don’t fight it. Your brain is so overworked with theories that you are not even fully conscious of what you do or why exactly you keep listening to him. You cannot fathom what could they possibly have prepared for you. 

The helmet is easy to slide on, the new barrier drowning the noises coming from the garage even more than the headphones had. It does feel a little claustrophobic though, with the way it presses your cheeks up and restricts your field of vision. Nick places something on your shoulders while you try to get used to it, some clicks sounding at your sides before he gives your helmet a pat and guides you over to the white Formula One car. There, he exchanges a few words with the people surrounding the machine, the one closest to you turning his head to send a thumbs up your way. Nick steps aside then, letting you free access to the car.  

Confused, you look up at him, a hand coming up to slide the visor of the helmet up so he can see your eyes. Are you missing something? What does he want you to do to the car? See it? You have already been ogling it from the side for half an hour.  

When you take a second too long thinking, he stretches a hand out towards the car, as if inviting you to get inside. But you are quick to decline this offer “Oh, no thank you”, raising your voice a little and taking a step back to further prove your point.  

Is this-? Are they expecting you to drive it or something? These people are crazy.  

Nick’s grin is playful “Sure, whatever you say”, his eyes rolling at your refusal, reaching a hand out for you to hold onto as he invites you once again to step into the car. 

“What for? I don’t want to” you dismiss him again, harsher this time, as cross your arms over your chest to strengthen your stance.  

You have been trailing after him like a lost puppy all day, no questions asked. It is about time you stand your ground. Are they not satisfied with having you dressed like an idiot in the middle of a place you do not know? All while cameras film your every move like this is the Hunger Games.  

“C’mon, we are late, stop playing games…” Nick tries again, his voice way firmer than before.  

The argument attracts a lot more attention than you would have liked, the eyes of all the men previously working on the car, now set on you. Everyone seems to be as confused as Nick, low murmurs being shared around the garage as they give you strange looks. That is the case for Nick as well, like he hadn’t thought you rebelling against him was ever an option, like this is just routinary. And when you finally take the time to mull it over, you understand why this change on your attitude may be sudden. The reunion, the clothes, the helmet… It was all preparation.  

How have you been so stupid? 

The stare contest is only broken by the yell of a man that echoes through the garage. “Why are you still here?! Get in the car already!” he almost orders, a deep frown set on his face. You remember him, he was in the first meeting, seated right at the head of the table. 

That angry tone sets everyone around you into motion, Nick’s hand finding the back of your shoulder and pushing you to get in the car. And you want to step your foot down, get his hands off you and run away from this madness. But it all goes so fast.  

As soon as you get seated on the car, hands start flying all around you. They screw in the steering wheel, connect some things and help you tightening down the straps of a belt that straps you down to the seat. No way out. You look up at Nick, silently asking for help —as if he was not one of them—, eyes slowly filling up with tears.  

What are you supposed to do now? There are so many people around, there is no way you are getting away from this.  

While you try to make sense of this situation, even more things start happening around you. The rest of the men —they must mechanics or something— start stepping away from the car, uncovering the wheels and giving space to a man in front of you. He walks backwards outside the garage, his face turning from side to side while holding a hand up for you to wait until he deems it safe. 

Still, nothing prepares you for the switch you feel inside of you when the man signals for you to come forward.  

From the force with which you grip the steering wheel to the way your foot falls on the pedal, everything feels instinctive. Even the low rumbling of the car coming to life under your body feels strangely familiar and comforting. A second nature. The machine manages to roll out of the garage without trouble, as if you had been doing this your whole life and you were not terrified about what is to come. There is only one possible outcome, and it does not look good for you. 

Thankfully —or maybe not so much—, your brain seems to shut down once the car passes through the garage door, the fear consuming your thoughts to such a point that you seem to go over the path in the blink of an eye. One minute you are giving one last look at Nick and the next you are being helped out of the car. The men in white had come to surround the car, one of them giving you a thumbs up and a pat to the helmet that had instantly filled you with relief. It is done, finished. You have not run into a wall, nothing bad has happened. 

And, although the fact that you seem to know exactly how to control a Formula One car should by itself have sent you into panic mode, that will instead be a problem for future you to resolve. 

Yet, as it seems to be a recurrent theme by now, that happiness is short and sweet. When you are helped out of that awful deathtrap of a car, your eyes are finally able to get an image of the place you have so stupidly driven to. Even though the road had been limited by tall, wired fences the whole way, it is only now that you are able to see the thousands of people seated behind them. You can only look at them in utter shock, vision still restricted by this awful helmet that doesn’t let your breath properly, as you try to wrap your head around what could be happening here and why have you been thrusted in the middle of it. 

Some look back at you, their smiles widening as they hold up different flags and banners for you to see, but their attention is promptly stolen by something —or someone— behind you, cheers getting impossibly louder. You follow their gaze instinctively, brows furrowed because what more could possibly be happening. 

Well, what is happening is that another Formula One car has arrived. What the hell. Your gaze uselessly follows the car, its navy blue paint a complete contrast to the white of your car —why you would even call it yours is beside the point. Not only that, but as the people on the road move aside to let the machine pass, you feel the fear that has been bubbling inside you for hours on end now, reach a new peak. The image of at least 10 other Formula One cars lined up is finally discovered before your eyes. 

The dots connect way too slowly as your eyes fly from one car to another, heart pumping blood on your ears like it is about to burst out of your chest. Had that lap been a simple warm up, a stupid way to get the cars in place for an actual race? 

It is a miracle that you manage to stand upright and follow one of the men dressed in white despite the way your legs are locking up. Breath heavy as if you had run a marathon. In hopes of calming yourself down, you reach up to take off the helmet and that stupid mask, both objects being held close to your chest as if someone was going to come and steal them.  

With this newfound freedom you try to gather your bearings for the nth time today. But, how can you, when your field of vision is filled with freaking Formula One cars of every color imaginable? Your chest can only tighten in fear of what is to come.  

The man guides you through the mass of people gathered around the cars, a couple of them sending smiles and words of encouragement your way as if you wanted to do anything other than scream your way out of this place. Everyone is just bubbling with an energy that your body cannot match, the mix of screams and cheers sending you further down into an anxiety attack instead. You feel like a puppet, the strings pulling you around this unknown place while people record your every move with one of the hundred cameras flashing all around.  

This has to be a nightmare, there is no other explanation. It cannot be the real word. How and why would you be here if it was?  

Someone does steal both your helmet and mask before you are brought to a separated part of the road, the asphalt covered with a red carpet to kind of mark a VIP area. For some reason, he flies the scene after that, leaving you completely alone in the middle of a road surrounded by a million cameras and strangers dressed from head to toe in one single color like this is a fucking film.  

The loneliness does not last long though, as you are yet again approached by another stranger and that recurrent phrase. “Congrats on P10!” a man dressed in a black jumpsuit comes to stand next to you, a smile being drawn on his lips as soon as your eyes meet “It’s your highest position yet, right?”  

Seriously, do you seem that approachable when you are freaking out or do these people just lack emotional intelligence?   

His question catches you off guard as much as the fact that he also talks to you in English, your brain scrambling to find a response that you do not have —because, well, it is your fist position ever, if that counts. You decide to mimic his grin instead, a curt nod as your answer since it looks more like an affirmation than a question.  

“Feeling nervous?” he queries right after, scrunching his nose as if he could feel the nerves running like thunders under your skin.  

For that you do have an answer: “A lot…”, but the reasoning behind it greatly differs from what he must be thinking about.  

Strangely enough, the sweet chuckle that he lets out brings a real smile to your lips, and even more so the calming words and praises that follow. That he knows you will do well, everything will turn out alright, while he confidently assures you that you will be taking some points home today. He is sure of it. The men from the meeting had said something similar, their ‘don’t be greedy’ has stayed at the back of your mind ever since. 

“You already know this but, be careful, the start is pure chaos when you are on the middle of the grid” he advices you as well, looking back at the line of Formula One cars like he can see it unfolding before his eyes.  

But why is he being so nice? Who is he? Talking to you with such care while you cannot get a single word out, too freaked out to react to any of this information. Your eyes slip down on their own to the hip of his jumpsuit, the letters showing despite the fact that he is not wearing it zipped up completely like you do, but rather with the top part wrapped around his waist. There you find what probably is the United Kingdom flag —yeah, he does sound English— and what must be his name: Lewis. 

“Anyway, better not to talk about it. Let’s go!” the man proposes at last, pointing with a tilt of his head to the men gathered a few meters away.  

Even though any sane person in your situation would have turned down the offer and run away from all these strangers, you cannot help but follow him. The fear of being left alone in an unknown place is somehow overpowering your desire of escaping. Where would you run to anyway? With which money? And if you call the police, what would you tell them? Would you even be able to understand what they say? It is not like you had been able to read a single town sign on the way here.  

Still, when you finally focus your gaze on the group of men ahead, you wonder if all this is just an extremely well-prepared hidden camera show. Because not more than a few meters away, in that group you are walking towards is the man that has been flashing through your mind all day long.  

The man from yesterday, the person who held you in his arms as everything faded around you, in that exact same bright orange outfit. 

Next chapter

___

Author's note: From now on the updates will take a bit longer since this is what I had already written, so you'll have to be patient with me hahaha. Thanks for all the nice comments and interactions!

Taglist: @purplephantomwolf @raye2000 @yuiiimd @drezzerk33 @leclercdream

[lainiespicewrites]

Electric Summer Ch 3.

AHHH I'm loving this story so much!!! Here's chapter 3! I couldn't stop writing this lol

Summary: Sy and Lainie get ready for the campers to arrive. Everyone gets to know each other. It's a perfect summer day until...the weather takes a turn.

warnings: light cursing.

Reblogs and comments ALWAYS welcome! Please let me know what you think!!

Link for Ch2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That night I barely slept. Buzzing with all of the energy from the day. The adrenaline and excitement and the butterflies. All of it ran through me like a high I didn’t want to come off of. But still I was skeptical. Was this the universe at play or was it just a coincidence? No, it couldn’t be. Not when all of my emotions seemed to be even stronger in his presence. And as much as I’d like to deny it, I still thought about him often. I had tried to let all of this go. But it’s like he had this grip on me. Everytime I tried to go out with someone new or go on a date. Or let someone touch me. It felt like I was betraying him. I knew that wasn’t true. I know Sy. He never really wanted me to wait forever, I don’t think either of us ever thought we’d see each other again. And if I had seen someone or been with someone he’d never hold that against me. But I just couldn’t do it. 

At some point I must’ve drifted off to a restless sleep. My alarm woke me at 6:30AM. After our dip in the lake yesterday I definitely needed a shower. After a quick morning shower and getting ready for the day. In just some simple workout shorts and a t-shirt. It was supposed to get hot today. I decided to start working on decorations for the cabin before breakfast. I remember one year our counselor made signs with  our names on them to hang over whatever bunk we’d chosen. I loved that idea. 

I went through the roster becca had given me when I’d checked in yesterday and got to work carefully drawing each name and fun summer designs on each one. I wasn’t much of an artist but I was genuinely pretty impressed with myself. 

Then I started to hang the garland letters sign I made for our door. Each year camp has a theme. And our counselors would come up with a name for our group or our cabin before we got there. It was always fun guessing and anticipating what cabin we would get. This year’s theme was classic movies. I smiled proudly to myself as I taped the string to the door after checking one last time to make sure it was straight. We were the “Pink Ladies” I may have a serious obsession with the film Grease. 

I’d decided that if we were paired with one of the boys cabins we would be the pink ladies and I’d convince the boys counselor to be the T-birds. Luckily, Sy didn’t take much convincing. We talked about it yesterday before we started going over the icebreaker games. Although he did briefly try to change my mind and talked about the boys doing a “Top Gun” theme but he conceeded when I pouted. I made both our signs last night. After about an hour of trying to fall asleep I gave up and sat on the floor cutting the letters out of cardstock. I planned on taking the sign over to him  after I figured out how to hang the fairy lights over the rafters. I climbed up onto the top bunk and started there making my way around the perimeter of the cabin. But there was still one long beam across the middle I started on the top bunk in one corner of the room but that only got me so far. I Pulled the little table in the center of the room over and climbed up standing on top of it. It was just tall enough for me to be able to toss the lights around and catch it on the other side of the beam. Just as I’d moved the table and climbed back up to start another section I heard the screen door open. 

“What are you doin?” He asked an edge of panic in his voice. Sy was leaning against the door frame watching me. 

“Hanging lights.” I shrugged, turning back to the task at hand. 

“You’re gonna get hurt,” He said. Walking over to the table staring up at me to meet my eyes. I looked down shaking my head. 

“I am not! I’m almost done once I finish this part I’m gonna climb onto the other bunk.” I explained wrapping the lights around one more time before starting to get down. I felt Logan’s hands on my waist steadying me and helping me off the table. “Thanks” I blushed turning away from him quickly it was to early for this. 

“Anytime darlin, you want some help?” He asked. I shook my head as I climbed the ladder to the top bunk diagonal from mine. 

“Nope this is the last part!” I said as I finished wrapping the lights around the beam. “Did you need something?” I asked. Looking down at him.

“Yeah you not to give me a heart attack!” He joked. I chuckled. 

“I was fine Logan!” I argued. He shook his head. 

“I was actually coming to see if you were ready to head over to breakfast?” He asked I looked down at my watch and looked back up. 

“Is it 8:30 already?” I asked. He nodded. 

“Sure is!” He smiled. I hopped down from the bunk laughing when his eyes went wide again. 

“Jesus woman,” He laughed. “Would you stop trying to get hurt!” He chided. 

“Oh so you can go of overseas and fight in a war, but I can’t do a little home decor without you threatening to put me in a bubble?” I raised an eyebrow. 

“I don’t mean you aren’t capable of doing it yourself darlin, it’s just if I remember right you tend to be accident prone.” He chuckled. 

“That was 7 years ago! I was 17, I was a little clumsy. That’s all.” I defended. 

“Sure,” He smiled. “You ready to go eat?” He asked. I nodded. 

“Just let me grab some shoes!” I slipped on a pair of vans and we headed out the door. 

I was so glad we took the time to sit down and enjoy breakfast because the rest of our morning and early afternoon went by so fast. 

We had another staff meeting about greeting campers. And meeting parents. Dealing with home sickness. A crash course on first aid. The first day’s schedule. Luckily Sy and I were with the older kids. High school age. So our day’s weren’t quite as structured. But somehow that made me more nervous. What if they just brushed us off and none of our effort was even worth it. 

I didn’t have time to think about it. At 1 pm right after lunch and after we finished. Some staff bonding games of our own it was time for check in. It was kind of a long process if I remember so I still had maybe 20 minutes before any of my campers would be there but I was still so nervous. I went and sat out on the picnic table writing down the schedule and some of the games Logan and I had talked about trying one last time to get all my thoughts organized. At one point when I looked up I saw him across the lawn standing on the porch of his cabin finally taping the sign I’d made to his door. 

Better late than never I suppose. I giggled to myself. To be fair it’s a miracle the boys cabins ever participated in those sorts of things anyway. They never were ones to decorate. And their cabins always had a certain…smell to them. I shook my head and looked up again just in time to catch his eye across the lawn. I smiled sending him a little wave. I saw him grin and he waived back. Just as I thought about walking over to chat, a young girl and what i’m guessing is her mom stopped in front of the cabin. 

“Cabin E?” The mom asked smiling. I nodded. Standing up to greet them. 

“That’s me!” I smiled. “Welcome to camp!”

“Thank you!” She said. “This is Emma,” she gestured to her daughter. 

“I can introduce myself mom,” she chided her mother. “I’ve been doing this for 4 years now.” Ah so she was a seasoned camper. She should be fun. 

“It’s nice to meet you Emma, I’m Lainie, do you need help bringing anything inside? I asked gesutring to her bags. 

“Oh I can help her!” Her mom jumped in. Emma rolled her eyes. 

“Mom I love you, but you’re hovering. I got it from here.” She assured her. The womans face fell but she nodded. 

“Alright I get it, it’s time for me to go.” she said. I gave her a sympathetic look. 

“Hey Emma no one else is here yet why don’t you go choose your bunk and get settled in, I always liked to get here early too so I could get the bed I wanted.” I told her. 

The girls eyes lit up and she nodded. She quickly hugged her mom and grabbed her bags walking toward the door. 

“It’s just two weeks mom! I love you!” she said before she walked inside. Her mother smiled sadly and looked back to me. 

“She’s so independent, I don’t know when that happened. She grew so fast. I’ll only get to do this with her one more year.” Her mother explained. 

“She’s just excited, I remember these days. I was a camper myself not to long ago. But trust me, about half way through the first week. I would start to get a little home sick. We alway miss our mommas.” I told her. 

“Thank you,” She smiled. “Sounds like she’s in good hands with you Lainie. I’d better go check on my son My husband is dropping off her twin brother Ethan. And they can both be a handful.” I laughed. 

“I know the type,” I chuckled. She smiled before heading off in the direction of Sy’s cabin. When I looked over there was a boy, and an older man standing outside talking with him. Emma’s mother joined them. The boy had blonde hair just like the girls. Must be her brother I thought.   I didn’t have much time to watch as two more campers and their family’s arrived. One whos name was Nicole she was also a camp alumn been coming just as long as Emma. It didn’t look like they knew each other very well though. Must not have been in the same cabin before. Nicole was a spitfire. Right out the gate. She walked right in claiming her bunk signing her name on the wall next to it, another camp tradition. She dismissed her parents right away as well. They stopped and talked for a bit but they’d done this before they didn’t have many concerns. The other girl  was much more timid and shy. She reminded me of myself my first year of camp. She was about a year or 2 younger than the other girls. Her name was Ryleigh. She was quiet when she introduced herself. Her mother talked to me about concerns of her being social and making friends. She was worried about her. I understood that. But I also understood the way that this place had a tendency to open people up and make them feel safe. What I told her was. I’d keep an eye on her. She’s gonna have a fun summer. I promised that. Another hour had gone by and all of my campers had arrived. I had 8 girls in my Cabin. I welcomed them all and gave them each their sign to put up by their bunks. 

“These are so cool!” Nicole said excitedly quickly climbing up to her bunk and taping it up immediately. 

“I like these!” Emma said, “Is it okay if we add more drawings or sketches to them?” She asked. I nodded 

“Absolutely they’re yours to do whatever you want with!” I smiled. “But if everyone is all settled in I think the boys are ready to meet up with us. Are you ready to meet everyone?” They were pretty excited to get things kicked off by this point most of the girls had been to camp at least once. They were ready to get the summer started. 

Sy and I had decided that we would meet up on the lawn and just sit out on the grass as a group to start things off. When we walked over Nicole immediately ran over hugging one of the boys, must be old friends. They immediately sat next to each other in the grass as Sy and I told everyone to form a circle. 

“Alright,” Sy spoke loudly getting everyones attention. “First we’d like to introduce ourselves. The boys have met me but ladies, I’m Logan, a lot of people call me Sy. I’ll answer to either one.” He smiled. I looked over and a couple of the girls were whispering to each other. I knew that face. I’d been the one making it years ago. Probably even still now. They thought he was cute. It’s so innocent those camp counselor crushes. I’d been there too. Once when I was 13 we had this counselor his name was Tanner. He was really nice and he played guitar and he sang. I was a sucker guys that were into music. I just smiled to myself, and realised it was my turn to talk. 

“We’re so excited to have you all here, I’m excited to meet all of your boys as well Sy! I’m Alayna but for most of my life and especially around here, everyone has always called me Lainie. Sy and I are so happy to be back here, we were campers ourselves but it’s been 7 years since we’ve been to camp.” I said. I stifled a laughed watching a few of them try to do the math in their head to calculate how old we were. 

“My family and I have been coming to camp since my dad was a kid,” Sy added. “I’m sure there are things that have changed since we’ve been here but there are some traditions that never wil!” He smiled. “You guys ready to kick off this summer?” They all cheered excitedly. 

“Okay,” I spoke. “Some people love this and some people don’t but there are 16 of you, there’s no faster way for us to learn all of your names and you who you are than some icebreakers.” a few of them groaned. “I know, I know we’re gonna make this as painless as possible, we were campers too remember? We went back and tried to find the games we had the most fun doing. 

“Everyone know how to play 2 truths and a lie?” Logan asked. Most of them nodded but we still explained the rules as a refresher. “But after we all guess.” He added. “We want you to talk a little bit more about one of your truths to us. Or explain why you chose that lie.” That seemed to really pique their interest. Beckett one of the boys in Logans cabin started the game. 

“Alright,” he started. “I’m a lifeguard, One time when my friends and I were on a college campus tour we played a pick up game of football with some of the college players. Or as a senior prank we stole our math teachers car.” Everyone started laughing. This kid had charisma. I could already see some of the girls eyes getting all dreamy. He was funny too. Sy was going to enjoy having him as a camper. 

“Did you still graduate?” Emma laughed. “No way you did that and didn’t get caught!” she said. 

“I graduated,” He nodded smirking proudly. 

“What position did you play?” Sy asked, talking about football. 

“In school I was wide receiver.” He answered. A few of the others went around asking questions. And then we all made our guesses. We all for sure thought he was lying about the car. 

“We got to sit in the stadium and watch them practice.” he said about the football. ��But we didn’t get to play. I’d love to play in college though!” He added. The boys started laughing and the some of the girls shook their heads. 

“No freaking way,” Nicole said “How’d you pull that off, How’d you steal the car?” He smiled proudly, this guy was going to be our camp clown for sure. 

“One of my buddies TA’d for him and he would ask him to get stuff for him out of his car sometimes. So we came up with the idea that when he asked we would meet down there and move it to the student parking lot. He was a super chill guy. He thought it was funny! After he found his car anyway!” We all laughed. The game continued on. They all had a lot of fun with it. Some of them coming up with really strategic lies. Or just basic stuff they wanted us to know about them. It turned out great. It was Ryleigh’s turn last. I could see she was nervous she’d been avoiding going the whole time. 

“Uh, I’m Ryleigh,” She spoke softly. “I’m in band, uh I-I really like to read, and one time in middle school I won a rollerskating contest at our roller rink,” She was playing with her fingers looking at the ground. 

“What’s your favoirte book?” I asked her. She looked up for a second giving me a nervous smile. 

“Uhm Thousand Words by Jennefer Brown,” She said. I smiled 

“I’ve read that Its really good!” one of the girls said. I watched her face light up a little bit. 

“What instrument do you play?” Sy asked. 

“I play guitar.” She said. He nodded giving her a soft smile. One of the boys asked about the roller skating thing and a few other questions and we all guessed. 

“I don’t think you roller skate,” Ethan, Emma’s twin brother said. 

“I do!,” she smiled surprised she had fooled most of us. “I’m actually not in band. I do play guitar though! My dad taught me.” she said. 

“That’s so cool!” Beckett said. “Did you bring your guitar with you? You could totally play at campfire!” He said. She blushed and nodded slightly. 

“I did.” she said. 

“Sweet!” He smiled at her.  

Our afternoon was going really well. We talked to the kids about what things they wanted to make sure we did as a group this summer. What traditions were important to them. The boys were so excited to help Logan start planning for the prank war. At somepoint we were going to play flashlight hide and seek. That was always fun. We always set that up right after it started to get dark. They wanted to do a camp fire breakfast. We made them promise they were going to get up early to help us with it. But they were mainly just excited to hang out with their friends and do whatever we had planned. They were such a great bunch of kids. It always seemed like no matter the generation. We always reverted back to a state of innocence when we were at camp. Leaving technology behind and just being present. 

It was turning out to be a perfect first day. We had the kids make their name tags and  were playing a few more group games before dinner. But just as we were finishing up our last game it started to sprinkle. We gathered everyone up to head over to the dining hall and the sky let loose. It started to rain steadily. We all ran over from the Cabin’s making it inside just before it started to down pour. 

“Well,” Logan said from behind me making me jump, He chuckled. “Didn’t mean to scare ya darlin, but I bet they cancel the welcome campfire tonight, it’ll be way to wet now.” He said. I nodded. 

“That sucks. Some of the girls were looking forward to it. They had friends in other cabins they wanted to see. I had no idea it was supposed to rain.” I said. 

“Yeah, I was checking the weather on my way in yesterday. Could Possibly turn into a pretty rough thunderstorm.” He added. 

“Oh,” I said softly, biting my lip. I hated storms. Especially at camp. The cabins always felt so small and so thin. Like they wouldn’t hold. It was the one time I didn’t feel safe. But I played it off. “Guess we’ll be inside the rest of the evening then!”

During dinner they did infact announce that they were canceling the big welcome camp fire. It was for all the age groups at camp to welcome everyone all at once. And then each night each of the age groups had their own campfire. But we’d be doing neither of those things tonight. So much for the perfect first day. After dinner we decided to run over to the rec room. There was a pool table, and darts. Foosball, card games, board games, all of the inside entertainment we would could ever hope for. A few of the other cabin groups decided to head there too. So the campers had a lot of fun. Most of them reunited with old camp friends and made some new ones. Some of them sat down to play some pretty intense card games or board games. Some just chose to sit and talk. I was feeling really good about our first day. But then I saw Ryleigh sitting by herself. My heart broke for her. I understood how having anxiety could make these situations so difficult. I was just about to go talk with her when Sy approached. 

“She’s a real sweet girl,” He said. 

“You noticed too, huh?” I asked. He nodded. 

“Yeah, hate to mention it but, kinda reminds me of you, in our days here.” He said. 

“I was just thinking the same thing. I was gonna go talk to her, see if there’s anything I can do to help.” I sighed. 

“Not yet, give it a minute.” He spoke. I raised an eyebrow. 

“What do you mean?” I questioned. 

“Just trust me, give it a minute.” He smirked crossing his arms. I stared at him confused for a moment. What did he know that I didn’t. But it very quickly made sense. 

“No you guys go ahead and start the next round I’ll be back,” I heard one of the boys say from the table where the campers had a big Uno game going. It was Beckett I watched as he stood from the table and nervously ran his hand through his messy hair. But then his demenor switched as he put on a charming smile and a confident mask. He walked over to where Ryleigh was sitting on a beanbag in the corner doodling on a piece of paper. He plopped down next to her. 

“Whatcha doin?” He asked her. She jumped startled not expecting anyone to be there. 

“Just, sketching…” she answered.

“You draw?” He asked. She shook her head. 

“Not really but…” I stopped listening. Letting them have their own conversation. I wouldn’t want someone to eavesdrop on a moment like this if I were her. 

“How did you…?” I trailed off. Sy chuckled. His shoulders shaking with laughter. 

“He noticed her a while ago. I’ve been watching him try to work up the nerve to go over there for the last 10 minutes.” he laughed. I smiled. 

“Wait, so you think he likes her?” I asked.

“Oh, he definitely likes her. If the military taught me one thing. It’s how to be observant. He’s had his eye on her since we all met up this afternoon.” he smirked. 

“That’s so cute,” I smiled

“I was the same way with you!” He admitted. I almost choked on air.

“I never noticed that,” I said. He shook his head smiling.

“Yeah, cause you were so quiet and stuck in your own head to realize what was going on. You didn’t even realized you liked me back until the second year we were at camp together.”  He laughed. 

“You did NOT like me first!” I argued. 

“Did too, Just because you didn’t notice doesn’t mean it wasn’t true.” He smirked. I opened my mouth to argue but there was a loud crack of thunder making me jump. I swallowed hard and looked down at the floor trying to hide the panic in my eyes. 

“Still don’t like storms huh?” He questioned. I bit my lip looking up at him and shook my head. 

“Hate them,” I said. Another roll of thunder and I felt myself tense. Sy put his hands on my shoulders making me look up at him. 

“It’s arlight we’re safe inside.” he assured me. I nodded. He and I walked over and sat with a few of the other counselors talking for a bit and keeping an eye on our campers. About 20 minutes later the weather alert went off on the radio in the rec room. We were under a severe thunderstorm warning. We could hear the rain pounding against the roof. My heart pounded in my chest. And the thunder was getting closer. Louder. 5 minutes later. The power went out. 

Sy immediately jumped up to take control of the room. 

“Everybody stay calm,” He spoke softly. I heard a zipper and some rustling. He’d pulled out a large flashlight from his bag. One of the counselors walkie talkies went off. Sy lifted his to his ear to listen. 

“Okay guys, just relax we’re gonna stay here until the storm lets up. Hopefully the power comes back on. Until then weve got some lantern flashlights to set up around the room. Just keep hanging out we’re alright.” He assured them. Sy and one of the other boys counselrs went into a supply closet finding the LED lantern lights they had 5 of them and set them out throughout the room illuminating it just enough for the kids to see and still be able to play cards or board games or talk. Some of the girls were a little nervous so I put on my best brave face to go over and talk to them. 

“Are you sure we’re safe in here?” Emma asked. I nodded. 

“We’re shielded from the storm and there aren’t many windows in here. We’re perfectly safe.” 

“I hate this.” another girl said. 

“I know, it’s not fun but it’ll,” another loud crack of thunder and I jumped. My breathing shaky, “It’ll.. It will uhm…” I started but I couldn’t get the sentence out the panic starting to take over. 

The girls both had nervous looks on their face. I was worrying them. Shit. I suck at this. 

“It’ll pass soon and we’ll head back to the cabins for the night.” I heard Sy say behind me. His hand softly pressed to my lower back. “Don’t worry we’ll get out of here and right back to all the fun stuff tomorrow.” he gave them a reassuring smile. 

They nodded. And I felt Logan gently leading me away. There was a small hallway that was out of the way and he pulled me to the side. “You alright?” He asked. I shook my head starting to feel myself shaking. 

“I-I can’t I can’t do this. I, how am I supposed to help them when I’m too scared myself and, I just I hate this.I feel like I can’t breathe!” I sniffed. He pulled me into him wrapping his arms around me gently shushing me. 

“Shhh it’s alright. You’re gonna be okay.” He said, holding me to him. “I’m not gonna let anything happen to you.” He soothed. 

“I’m sorry.” I breathed. 

“Don’t, it’s alright.” he whispered. “Just keep breathing for me,” He talked me through it. And when I calmed down we walked back out sitting on one of the couches again. I stayed quiet a moment watching the room. 

“Sy,” I spoke finally. Just as I went to thank him his radio was going off again. We were cleared to head back to the cabins. The heavy part of the storm had passed but it was still raining. We ran back and Sy and I parted on the lawn getting our campers settled. He got the boys back to his cabin and they settled in. He made sure they all made it back 

“Alright boys I’ll be right back I’m gonna go check on the girls make sure they all made it!” he told them. He ran over across the lawn and knocked on our door. I answered quickly and let out a deep breath when I saw it was him. 

“You girls alright?” he asked. 

“Yeah!” some of them answered. I smiled 

“We’re okay.” I said softly. He smiled and nodded for me to join him out on the porch. I turned back to the girls “I’ll be right back ladies, go ahead and get ready for bed, lights out is in 30 minutes!” I told them. I closed the door behind me. And let the sceen door slam shut. 

“Are you okay?” He asked after a beat of silence. 

“Yeah, I am,...Thank you for helping me back there,” I said. 

“This isn’t our first storm together honey,” He smiled. “I’ll always be there to help ya.” I blushed. 

“You’ve always been such a gentleman. You’re mama raised you right.” I smiled. 

“Nah, just with you, comes naturally,” He said. I felt my cheeks heat up even more and I looked away trying to compose myself. 

“So, was that…all?” I asked. He stepped closer to me until I was leaning against the picnic table. 

“No,” He smiled. “There’s one other thing.” He brushed his thumb over my cheek his eyes staring down into mine. I couldn’t take it anymore. We’d drawn this out for too long. 7 years too long. I wrapped one arm around his neck the other hand gently resting on the back of his head pulling him down to me. He responded immediately pressing his lips to mine. His other hand found my waist pulling me close holding me against him. All of the air left my lungs as I kissed him back with everything I had. I whimpered softly when he pulled away. 

“Shit, “ He smiled breathless. “Only took me 7 years but I uh..” He breathed “just wanted to kiss you goodnight.”  I nodded still cathing my breath smiling so hard my cheeks hurt. 

“One more for good measure?” I asked blushing. He smirked. And pulled me in again kissing me softer this time. It was slow and sensual. He leaned his forehead against mine when he pulled away. 

“A man could get addicted to that,” he said. I smiled slowly trailing my hand from his should and down his chest. 

“I wouldn’t mind.” I laughed. He chuckled and pecked my lips one more time. 

“Goodnight Darlin’” 

“Goodnight, Sy” I watched him run through the rain back to his cabin and I stood their for a moment regaining my composure before I went back inside. Just as I was about to open  the door. I heard the one of the girls say

“No, I’m serious you guys I think they’re married!” it sounded like Nicole

“Nikki, Neither one of them is wearing a ring!” Emma said. 

“Okay well dating at least, They’re like super in love! You should’ve seen them in the rec room! I had to pee and they were in the hall by the bathrooms. He was like holding her it was so cute!” 

“Aww that’s so sweet, she was definitely scared! I felt so bad!” One of the other girls, Chloe added. 

“I know, OH MY GOD! Do you think they’ll let us call them Mom and Dad? Remember last year when we had Carrie and Andrew and they were married? That was so cute they literally treated us like their kids!” nicole squealed. 

“I hope so!” Emma said “I really like them! They’re both so nice, and I really hope they’re dating if they’re not they need to be, because they’d be so cute together!” I chuckled to myself before opening the door and they’re attention turned to me but they went quiet. 

“Okay girls gossip time is over! Time for lights out!” I said. They groaned. 

“Okay but wait, are you and Logan Married?” Nicole asked. 

“Nicole do you see a ring? What did I just say? But you two are dating right?!” Emma added. I chuckled to myself and shook my head. 

“Goodnight girls.” 

“Ugh fine be like that girl,” Nicole pouted. 

“Goodnight Lainie!” Emma called. 

“Goodnight,” Ryleigh said softly. The rest of the girls settled in and I turned out the lights and climbed into my bunk. I bit my lip and smiled to myself holding in an excited. Squeal. Maybe this was still the perfect first day after all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

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[scoobydoodean]

Honestly I think that a lot of the reason why people view dean as abusive towards jack is because they genuinely think of him as a baby/toddler and not someone with the cognitive abilities of an older teenager/young adult who just happens to not really know much about the world. Obviously there's more to it because people ignore that cas wanted to put jack in the cage and sam wanted to use his power, but I stumbled across a post the other day about how they (the writers and the characters) should've given jack a capri-sun instead of a beer because he's a "literal toddler"... which is just completely incorrect and considering he has the body and brain development of someone who's older, there's no reason to not give him a beer. (also is anyone really a dad unless they give their 3 yr old a beer /j)

Context

It's funny because the whole point of the beer scene is to establish that Jack is not a child and that treating him like one would be ridiculous.

[DEAN grabs and opens a bottle of beer. JACK imitates him.] DEAN Wait, wait, wait, wait. How old do you think you are? JACK 3 days, 17 hours, and 42 minutes.

(From 13.02)

When Jack proves that he has such an advanced understanding of communication and time and such an unusual awareness of exactly how much time has passed, Dean immediately realizes that treating him as if he's a baby makes absolutely no sense because he clearly isn't one. Treating him like a child would be infantilizing, and we see Jack rebel against the notion that he's a baby a few times.

There's some push I think to separate Jack's intellectual abilities from his emotional coping abilities, but even these I think are more or less on track with other young adolescents around the age he presents himself to be when controlling for traumatic experiences. Jack's initial emotional regulation abilities don't read like those of a toddler, but of a young adult who's confused and upset and has been through a lot. Without powers in the mix that he doesn't know how to control, his emotional regulation abilities seem fairly standard for boys his age (at least to me). I don't think for example, that the anger he experiences and the reasons he experiences that anger can be equated with toddler-like tantrums, and any other person whose been around a toddler and sees what kind of things make them furious knows what I mean.

Granted, there are things Jack is naive about that are probably connected to him being "born yesterday". We see this early on when Asmodeus tries to manipulate Jack into opening a hell gate. At the same time, this interaction also highlights Jack's innate sense of right and wrong as a counterbalance. I personally find it frustrating when people try to take away Jack's understanding of right and wrong (rooted in his love for others) and cast him as a baby to the extent that he isn't even capable of understanding the golden rule, when Jack shows over and over how seriously he takes the personhood of other people and the weight of their lives. This is what allows him to see through Asmodeus's trickery in a very confusing situation, simply realizing, "you're hurting my friends". Jack using his care for others as a foundation to navigate Asmoedus's trickery also serves as excellent contrast to soulless Jack in 14.19. Soulless Jack was not able to grasp that Dumah was manipulating him because he was missing this crucial piece of himself—his love for other people including strangers. Because he was lacking that part of himself at that time, he was unable to grasp that filling someone's body with worms for not wanting to be turned into an angel is horrible and cruel and couldn't be a good thing. His naivety played a role in what happened, but it was the crucial missing soul that actually allowed this situation to transpire. I think a lot of people just straight up think normal Jack also would have been manipulated into killing people for Dumah in this circumstance and I really just don't think that's true at all.

[daceydeath]

Working Proposal (Part 4)

Pairing: Han x reader, Felix x reader Word Count: 3.9k Genre: Smut Warnings: 18+, minors dni, swearing, unprotected sex (don't be stupid), threesome, cum play, oral sex (f receiving)

You had been working with Stray Kids for a while now and after a long day at work turns into a very unexpected but intriguing proposal. Will this change your world or end your career?

Walking back into the JYP offices the following day was as chaotic as you imagined, your desk was covered notes from the reception desk of people to return calls to, your co workers were all asking if you were well since you had only missed 3 days of work in 3 years but you could hardly explain that you has spent the day in bed with one of the most handsome idols in the industry fucking you senseless for hours, so you smiled and thanked people for their concern. Making your way down to the dance studio you knew you probably would be very early for the morning meeting but you could at least use the studio to hide from any further questions. Opening the door you found yourself alone the kids and managers must be working on something else, or had not yet arrived. Opening your emails you began firing off things that needed to be dealt with immediately regarding the scandal or the legal department, then you began returning calls assuring brands that they did not need to cut ties or do re-shoots until you and the police knew more about the perpetrators.

"You're in early baby" Chan chuckled bringing your gaze from your work to him and making you realize that he wasn't alone both Han and Changbin were with him and you knew the others would not be far behind.

"Morning" you beamed "I needed to get some work done without trying to explain where I was yesterday, I can hardly tell the truth" you giggled turning back to your emails again.

"I guess that is true" Changbin laughed as Minho and Felix arrived.

"How are you doing Han? Are you feeling alright?" You asked switching off your screen to give him your full attention as you waited for the last three members and staff to arrive.

"I'm not great" he admitted quietly.

"If you need anything you only have to ask, I will fix this though I promise" you sighed pouting slightly at his sad eyes.

"Morning" some of the staff greeted as you stood to speak to them patting Han's shoulder as you passed "Have you seen the latest from legal?"

"Yes I've already asked that the police press charges and that we start defamation proceedings immediately" you nodded as two of the managers entered the room.

"What happens if they are just kids though?" one asked looking to you "Surely you're not planning on having them arrested"

"I don't care if they are children they still need to be held accountable for their actions, the whole media circus will probably scare them straight but they still need to go through the motions" you sighed feeling like it wasn't likely that it was a young teen, they tended to do stupid things and less malicious things "I feel it's more likely to be an anti to be honest or a sasaeng" you sighed annoyed at the whole thing.

"Is this the first large scale scandal you've dealt with?" Another asked looking slightly worried.

"No, I've dealt with sasaeng fans before and stalkers I just get protective of the artists I work with, that is my job after all" you smiled politely before going back to your seat to collect your things before the meeting started. You sat quietly typing away more emails and team notes making sure that all of Chan's suggestions were being acknowledged and hopefully met, then waited for the staff to head off to their respective roles or tasks for the day.

"What are your movements today?" Felix asked sweetly after the others had gone.

"I've got emails upon emails, then a side of emails and possibly lunch then I'll have to stop hiding and go back to my desk to look at the next lot of brand deal things your doing" you grinned noting how soft and cute he looked with no make up and his hair still slightly fluffy.

"Are you going to be hiding here?" Seungmin narrowed his eyes at you playfully.

"Not if I am going to be in your way, I'm sure there is a broom closet or stairwell I can hide in too" you chuckled you couldn't help that they made you feel relaxed around them they were just so down to earth when they interacted with you.

"No you would never be in the way" Jeongin squeaked looking very much the maknae in his over sized hoodie with the hood up.

"No stay here we can still practice with you here it's not a problem" Felix added wide eyed.

"Don't panic if you don't care that I'm here I will stay" you grinned shaking your head at them and going back to the things you were working on. They began their choreography run through practicing each song together and they sepeartley if needed but you barely noticed with the work you were already caught up in, the only time you noticed was each time you phone vibrated you would quietly exit the room to not disturb them, take the call, then walk back in to find them not practicing but quietly talking amongst themselves which quickly stopped as soon as they spotted you in the doorway.

"You know how sus you all look each time I come and go from the room right?" you asked dryly knowing that they probably did but would never admit it "I thought you would be better actors by now".

"What would you say to breaking for lunch and joining us for some food?" Changbin smiled softly looking every bit the cutie you knew he was.

"What are you thinking?" you replied smiling in return.

"Well we aren't sure" Minho started his teasing tone already in full swing

"Oh really, because if one of you says me I will walk straight back out that door" you continued smiling sweetly at him leaving some of them wide eyes and the others snickering.

"Your'e no fun" Minho pouted playfully.

"No I suppose I'm not" you rolled your eyes going back to your emails.

"Are you alright? You can tell us if any of us have over stepped any marks" Chan's voice was warm but serious as he observed you carefully.

"Yes and no, I would rather not deal with any extra activities while I'm at work, if that is alright with you. A few of the team have pretty loose lips for people in this business" you met his eyes trying to assure him you were not upset or hurt just wary.

"Someone has said something to you?" Changbin instantly snapped from sweet to protective and Chan's face turned annoyed as you sighed.

"Yes, the events of the music video shoot did not go unnoticed apparently" you tried to mask the tension in your voice but couldn't.

"Shit" Changbin groaned looking guilty.

"Fuck" Chan whispered rubbing his hand over his face. "do you want to stop this then, I meant it when I said that we would stop whenever you wanted, we would never punish you for it especially since it would be our fault" he looked frustrated and guilty which made you feel saddened that you were placing more on his shoulders.

"Who?" Minho asked obviously also aware of what had gone on.

"What happened at the music video? Is this about that argument Bin and Minho had? Jeongin asked confusion written on his face.

"After that happened um...."Changbin started to explain his ears turning pink.

"We had sex in the artist rooms" You giggle watching how red Changbin turned. "I know you're a gentleman and I very much appreciate that but we are going to have to be honest with each other right now" you shrugged.

"And someone knows about you and Changbin?" Hyunjin smirked.

"and Chan" you added quietly "He was there too".

"Sorry someone knows about Chan, Changbin and you" he amended making Chan's ears also go slightly pink.

"I don't get why you're embarrassed, I agreed to everything that happens between us and I assume you guys talk about it so none of you interrupts another" you quirked an eyebrow at them all. "Plus you have already had arrangements before me why is this embarrassing?"

"I thought you said you had only had vanilla before you signed up" Han laughed at his members expenses easily.

"I had, that was my first time with more than one other person" you admitted sheepishly.

"So you signed up, met with Chan and then fell into a threesome?" Han's eyes widened comically.

"No comment" you sighed as your phone rang again and you turned to leave the room again.

"We are getting lunch though right?" Changbin asked as you shut the door nodding at him. By the time you got off the call Felix was bouncing on his toes next to the door waiting for you to finish up.

"Did you want to come grab the food with me?" he grinned "it has just arrived at the desk".

"Of course Felix" you grinned following him to the lifts to help carry what you knew was going to be a monstrous amount of food, the kids could really east when they were allowed to. so you were unsurprised that there were two large boxes and a couple of bags waiting for collection.

"Did you want me to take the boxes and you grab the bags?" He asked sweetly.

"How about a box each and we can share the bags?" you smiled again, being with Felix made it very easy to spend the whole time smiling he was, as the others always said, real life sunshine. He spent most of his time trying to make his members lives easier and they adored him in return. "What on earth did you guys order anyway?"

"Chan Hyung has got some pho, there is a heap of meat and rice, I got some chicken, um I think we have kimchi friend rice and I forgot what Seungminnie and Innie got" he explained making sure you got into the lift safely.

"It might have been easier to tell me what you guys didn't order" you chuckled as he continued to make sure you didn't trip as you walked and opened the studio door for you.

"Yessss" Changbin cheered as you followed Felix into the studio arms laden with food.

"Here let me" Chan insisted taking the box from your arms and placing it on the floor for you while you untangled the bags hanging from your arms.

"Sit with me?" Han whined softly looking at you cutely.

"How could I resist that face" you cooed taking a seat on the floor beside him only for Felix to fling himself to your other side squeezing in between you and Hyunjin making the older one pout. "Now, now children if you can't play nice I will go back to my desk" you faux scolded raising an eyebrow.

"Yeah sharing is caring" Seungmin smirked cheekily making you get flustered all over again.

"You're so cute when your flustered kitten" Minho cooed from across the floor from you.

"She's so cute full stop" Hyunjin grinned "Especially when she makes that faces she makes when she...."

"Hyunjin stop" you mumbled feeling your skin heating up further as you looked at your lap making them all stop and look at you worried.

"I'm sorry princess" Hyunjin apologized immediately looking at you with puppy eyes "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, I would never want that" he reached behind Felix to stroke your arm and when you allowed it take you hand and kiss your knuckles.

"It's alright Hyunjin, forget it" you smiled slightly as the others continued to quietly watch you "I am just not used to all the attention".

"Aww don't be sad" Felix soothed wrapping this arms around you and leaning his head on your shoulder "You can't be sad when there is a present for you".

"Why is there a present? Felix what have you done?" you narrowed your eyes at the fluffy hair on your shoulder.

"It wasn't just me, its Han too" Felix beamed his eyes creasing into cute little half moons.

"Yeah, this is for you" Han smiled softly sliding a white gift bag towards you.

"It this explodes when I open it I will scream you know that right?" you giggled poking the bag with one finger not sure what to expect.

"It's not a bomb!" Han whined comically placing it into your lap as Felix unwound his arms from your frame.

"Hmm" you hummed untying the ribbons at the top of the bag and peering in you saw a cloth bag that was obviously keeping the gift safe pulling it out you saw the distinctive logo printed on the soft fabric "What have you two done?" you gasped as your eyes went wide.

"I saw you talking to Yeji last week and I overheard you talking about how much you liked it..." Felix trailed off.

"So you bought me a designer bag???" you yelped as your fingers grazed the soft leather back inside.

"Well yeah you should have all the nicest stuff, I mean you work so hard for us so why not?" Han shrugged as you pulled it out to trace your fingers along the metal logo on the front.

"You really shouldn't have boys, really this is far too much" you blinked as tears sprung to your eyes over how touched you were by the sweet, albeit over the top, gesture.

"Aww so cute" they all cooed at you as you looked up at the ceiling to stop the tears properly forming.

"I did tell you that you were likely to be spoiled by us" Chan grinned looking thrilled with how happy you looked. You shook you head still shocked at the whole thing. You leaned over to Han and pulling him into a soft kiss before letting him go and repeating the gesture with Felix both boys glowing pink after you let them go.

"If that is the reaction we get after you like something you're going to get presents every day" Jeongin grinned already planning to buy you everything you had ever had your heart set on.

Your phone rang again before you could respond to the threat of ridiculous spending and you stood back up to take the calls while the boys continued to eat. You could see it was the legal department so once again you ventured out into the hallway so that you could have both privacy and also protect them from any bad news should there be any, taking in the information you were given you agreed to go with one of the lawyers to the police station to go over the evidence that had been gathered. Hurrying back into the studio you collected all of your things quickly packing your work bag and taking the gift bag Felix held out in his fingers before pecking his cheek and rushing to your meeting.

Hours later you got a text from Chan asking you to meet back at the company figuring it was going to be for other activities you dropped in at your apartment to change and freshen yourself up and change into something more attractive. You assumed it would be Chan you were meeting or maybe him and Changbin but you weren't expecting you walk into Chan's studio to find Han and Felix spinning slowly on office chairs while scrolling through their phones.

"Evening" you smiled walking in casually and plopping yourself down on the couch.

"Hi" Han squeaked seeming shyer than his usual self

"Hello" Felix added already blushing faintly, they had obviously asked Chan to invite you to the studio but you had a feeling it was slightly different to normal for them.

"What can I do for you both?" you whispered as seductively as you could without giggling. Han got to his feet quickly pulling you up and connecting his lips to yours in a hurried but still soft kiss, holding you to him by your waist and Felix slowly made his way behind you his hands stroking your hips as he moved your hair to kiss the side of your neck.

"Can we just see where this goes?" Han breathed against your lips making you smile against his lips and nod. You remembered that Felix didn't probably want to have sex but that didn't mean you couldn't give him some form of pleasure whether it be from your mouth, your hands or your performance as you let Han do whatever he wanted to with your body. Both their hands wandered around your body and under your clothes, Felix undid your pants for Han and dragged them down your legs until they were bunched at your ankles.

"Do you always wear such pretty things or was this for us?" Felix panted into your ear you could feel from the way he was pressed against your back he was already getting hard.

"For you, Felix only for you" you whimpered as Han began massaging and kneading your breasts under your shirt.

"Better get this off huh?" Han whispered pulling the fabric of your shirt up your stomach and Felix wrapped his arms around you again cupping your heat and making you gasp.

"Such a pretty girl for us" Han cooed taking in your lacy lilac lingerie.

"So perfect and pretty" Felix echoed dragging the pads of his fingers but up your body and making you shiver.

"Do you want to go first Lix?" Han asked over your shoulder meeting Felix's eyes.

"Sure Hannie" Felix whispered deeply spinning you in his arms so he could take his time kissing you. Felix kissed you exactly as you expected staring out sweet and tentative and quickly becoming sensual as you responded to him, whining as you allowed his tongue to enter your mouth to dance with yours his hands squeezing your hips and holding you as close to him as he could.

"So fucking hot pretty girl" Han murmured as you heard him step back from you and sit back down on one of the chairs. Felix maneuvered you back so your legs bumped the soft pads of the couch.

"Please sit jagi" Felix whispered against your lips before gently guiding you to sit falling to his knees between your open legs "Can I taste you? Please" he looked up at you with big doe eyes.

"Yes Felix, please" you whimpered lifting your hips as he dragged you forward and slipped your underwear down your legs before throwing them to Han who pressed them to his face breathing deeply. Felix grinned as he kissed his way from your knee all the way to the top of your thigh enjoying how you twitched under his lips. You groaned as he slid two fingers through your already wet slit collecting your essence and bringing it to his lips to taste you.

"She taste good man?" Han grunted freeing himself from his shorts to lazily tug on his own cock.

"So fucking sweet, Hannie" Felix groaned repeating the way he slipped his fingers through your folds but instead offering them to Han who took them into his mouth instantly groaning around the other mans digits.

"Fuck" you whispered entranced by the scene before you until Felix turned back to you and instead dragged his tongue through your wet lips making your head drop against the back of the chair "Felix" you moaned grabbing his hair and carding it through your fingers.

Felix licked and slurped teasingly as he went from circling your clit with the tip of his tongue to delving it inside you and stroking your walls gently with it, the whole time moaning and whimpering into you.

"Fuck Felix, Fuck" you mewled trying not to grind his face into you as you rapidly chased your impending orgasm.

"Fuck his face pretty girl, show him how much you like it" Han smirked still slowly stroking himself as he waited for his turn.

"Oh god, Felix" you cried as you let yourself go coming hard against his lips, he slowed his pace as you rode out the aftershocks eventually pulling away from you and wiping his face on the back of his hand.

"So perfect jagi" he mumbled against your lips as he gave you one last lingering kiss, while Han moved himself from the chair to the spot beside you on the couch.

"Felix is good with his mouth isn't he pretty girl?" He teased softly moving you gently to help you straddle his hips "Think you will be able to ride me?" he chuckled taking in your fucked out expression.

"Sure Hannie" you purred as he lined himself up with your entrance and waited for you to sink down his length.

"So tight pretty girl" he muttered into the skin of your neck as you lazily rocked your hips against his enjoying the stretch of your walls around his cock. "Can you take a little more?" he groaned holding your hips and thrusting up into you slightly making you gasp.

You laid your palms on his clothed chest giving yourself more leverage and began moving your hips faster making him tighten is grip on your hips and start thrusting up into you harder and faster as you clenched around him.

"Fuck pretty, I won't last long if you keep squeezing me" he ground out making you lean in to kiss him again, your tongues tangled together and you both increased your speed, the sound of his hips slapping up into you making Felix groan from the other chair.

"Han please" you mewled as he his thrusts began to lose rhythm as he got closer to his release.

"Want to cum on you, can I?" he moaned loudly and you nodded frantically making him pull out of you suddenly and flip you onto your back before he began jerking himself off over you. Felix quickly joined Han looming over you cock in hand as they reached their peaks almost together Han first thick ropes of cum spraying over your cunt with Felix following just after covering your stomach in his seed. Panting slightly Felix quickly left the room after tucking himself back into his sweats and Han leaned down to kiss you again.

"You are amazing pretty girl" He mumbled against you lips between soft gentle kisses.

"You really are jagi" Felix smiled appearing at your side with a damp cloth and a bottle of water "Do you want me to help you clean up?"

"Thank you Felix" you sighed watching him as he slowly and gently wiped you clean as Han collected the clothes that had been discarded.

"Here pretty girl lets get you dressed" Han grinned helping you to your feet.

"Please tell me you aren't going to buy me something each time you want to spend time with me" You giggled watching them both take turns to help you put something on or give you a sip of water.

"Maybe not every time" Felix smirked before his face broke into breathtaking grin.

A/N: As always I adore all of you who spend your precious time reading something I wrote, any comments, reblogs or like are appreciated xx

Taglist (open): @christopher-bangnaldoskzz, @symptoms-of-moonlight, @septicrebel, @ayoitschannie, @krishatumblernow, @tangerminie, @elizalabs3, @armystay89, @septemberkisses, @stay-bi,

[angelisgonnastartchangingurls]

tell us everything about your day yesterday

oh, ok!

i woke up at 5:30am and went out for a run. it was pretty short, 3 miles, i was back in a half hour. i got really sick a few weeks ago and my lung capacity is still not 100%, i ran five miles a few days ago and i threw up on the sidewalk.

anyway, when i got back home i paced around in the backyard for ten minutes to cool down, and then i slipped back into the house to my bedroom and woke up jake by sucking his cock. we fucked (me on top, no real foreplay, the cocksucking only lasted a few seconds and we went straight to fucking) and we came at the same time, and then i laid in bed leaking while jake got up and showered as the kids woke up. at this point it was like 6:40. i got up and made oatmeal for my kids (with blueberries!) in a robe and jake was all dressed and ready before 7, so i left him to get the kids dressed and stuff and i answered a bunch of emails. i do this now in the mornings so i can get to the office after everyone but i already have them working on stuff. LOL.

the kids were playing for a bit before school, and margot woke up, so jake made breakfast for me and margot and himself, so i ended up out there with them having coffee and chatting until 8:10, and I was still in just a robe, so Jake walked the kids to school, which is usually my job.

i got dressed (no shower, LOL. white panties, no bra, jeans and a t-shirt - very professional) and margot was making a shopping list so i tried to remember everything i needed (i forgot most of it, i always do, so i have to go to target today). and then jake got home so i kissed him goodbye and left for work. i got to the office at 9:20. i had meetings with various little teams from 10-12 and by the end of the second meeting I was very bitchy and everyone was like, "OK stop giving angel new information" which i thought was a very insightful analysis of me as a coworker.

i had coffee and two cigarettes with jane, a fairly recent hire who is like a 40s goth punk chick who reminds me a lot of ivy if ivy had never gone corporate and had a dozen babies. i love jane, she's 15 years sober from heroin and she rocks. she also compliments my waist a lot, she (like many of you lol) can't believe i pushed two kids out of my pussy.

then i walked to my friend casey's work to meet her for lunch. i don't know if i ever talked about casey. i think so? she is like 27 years old and she has a baby and a much older husband and a stepdaughter who is 19. when i was in my lexi-obsessed phase she was adjusting to returning to work with a baby in her life so we didn't hang out much but now we see each other all the time.

we had lunch at a bagel place and i was back at work by 1:45, just in time for more meetings, but these were with clients and i was nicer. the t-shirt with no bra was a very good strategic decision, one of the bigger guys at the company stared at my tits the whole time, and agreed with everything i said. i wore my hair down too and played with it a lot, you know, alternating between ditzy hair twisting and sort of gathering it and arranging it behind my back like i was about to put it into a blowjob ponytail.

N.B. the ponytail blowjob is such a stereotype/meme but i never do that. i let my hair fall all over the place when i am sucking dick. men love my hair.

i had an hour in my office during which i accomplished literally nothing. i looked at my phone and deleted some emails. that's it. then i had a meeting with my boss, and we talked exclusively about sex with our respective partners. his wife is cumming really easily lately, which on the one hand he likes and on the other hand doesn't like because she's wrapping up sex really early. he said about half the time he doesn't get beyond eating her pussy; she cums and then sucks his cock and won't stop until she's swallowed every drop. but even when they get to fucking, he said she cums in like 40 seconds and hops off to suck his cock. i told him to start slapping her clit with his cock to stop her orgasms. he said she'd get so mad at him if he did that and i said, "i would beg for more." anyway, he told me i am doing a great job with the team lately so i flashed my tits at him.

alice called me at 4 and just clearly wanted to talk at me, but i let her, it's kind of like a podcast, and so she was in my ear for the end of my work day and my ride home.

when i got home, margot and the kids were in the park, so jake fucked me in the kitchen, quick and hard, panties and jeans down, bent over the kitchen island, his hand on my clit. he came inside me again and i pulled my jeans and panties up right over the mess and walked around like that all afternoon, making dinner and catching up with everyone. dinner, did a puzzle with my daughter, bathtime for the kids, storytime, bedtime, and i just took my jeans off and relaxed on the couch with jake and margot and we watched a movie. i fell asleep on jake's shoulder after the movie was over, and he moved me over on the couch, took margot to her room, fucked her and came on her tits, took a picture of it and sent it to me, which woke me up, LOL, but i was too tired to move so i let jake come in, naked, and carry me to bed. at some point in the night i took my panties off because they were full of dried cum, and this morning i woke up next to jake, he was naked and i was in just a t-shirt, so i pushed my ass against him until he woke up and fucked me from behind nice and slow. i came twice.

[anamoon63]

Hi guys, I am writing this in case anyone wonders why I have been kind of MIA lately. No, I haven't forgotten you, but I have had a difficult week, more than a difficult week, I have been through a real ordeal. Where or how it started it's a long story which I don't have the time or the energy to tell, so I'll just share a brief chronology of what happened during this past week.

Friday May 3 - I turned in my finished work and set out to do my sims posts, play and rest for the weekend since more work would be coming my way on Monday.

Saturday May 4 - My husband came down with the flu, I spent most of the day with him in the emergency room.

Sunday May 5 - I spent it taking care of my husband, who fortunately no longer had a fever. I barely slept two hours at night giving care and medication.

Monday 6 May - My birthday, we couldn't go out for dinner as usual, so we celebrated at home.

Tuesday, May 7 - My son comes down with the flu, too, another afternoon in the ER and sleepless night caring for him and bringing down his fever.

Wednesday, May 8 - My son starts to feel better, and begins to recover very quickly. I start working on the following translations, at the same time I take care of both my husband and my sick son, do food, laundry, order home medicines, and all kinds of small chores, including disinfecting things. It's like going back to 2020.

Thursday, May 9 - My husband no longer has a fever but does have a cough that won't go away and minor problems with his asthma.

Friday, May 10 - Mother's Day, my son was feeling fine, my husband still had a cough, and had a doctor's appointment at noon, when he returned, we celebrated at home just like on my birthday, I spent the rest of the day working, and juggling a thousand other things. In the evening my daughter started to feel sick, but still no fever.

Saturday, May 11 (yesterday) - My daughter woke up with a fever, another visit to the ER. She was prescribed flu medicine, painkillers and rest, and sent home.

And that's my odyssey so far. On top of it all, from Wednesday through Saturday we were in the middle of a heat wave with temperatures of 37ºC with real feel of up to 45ºC; at night we get a "cooler" temperature of 29ºC. So imagine a person with a fever of 38 ºC and with this heat, obviously it's not of much help.

Surprisingly, I haven't gotten sick so far, but I'm not claiming victory. I have been taking care of my family for a week, sleeping two or three hours a night, getting up at different times to check on them, or give them medicine. I don't have time for getting sick! Lol. Thankfully, everyone is better and last night for the first time in a week I was able to sleep straight through. Honestly, I don't need many hours of sleep, but I am routinely and usually I am in bed a 11 pm and up at 8 am every day, so all this did upset my sleep cycle a little bit.

Anyway, that is the reason why I wasn't here much, since the whole day I was too busy, and at night I was so tired all I wanted was to go to bed. I apologize if I've fallen behind on your updates, I'm not ignoring you in any way, I just didn't have the strength or the time, not even to play The Sims. If I did, it was just a little free play to distract myself.

Last week I told you that I was juggling a lot of things, well now I have even more things, lol, at times I feel really exhausted, and even a little cranky from lack of sleep, the first few days my feet and legs hurt so much from going back and forth, but I'm fine, healthy, and in good spirits. Today I believe, as never before, that the universe does not send you more than you can handle.

At this point my family is already in recovery, if I don't get sick too, it's likely by I'll be able to get back to my simming routine. Now, if I do get sick, I hope to recover as quickly as the others. Whatever happens, I'll be around. Know that, even if I don't comment, I read you, and I am with you, especially with those who are going through difficult times of any kind.

Ok, I said to myself this was going to be a short post, but I made a wall of text instead (for a change). My apologies if it's written in a sloppy or confusing way, I just wanted to write it quickly to let you know where I have been and what has been going on with me these days. I hope you are all well, please take care of yourselves, health is a treasure that can be lost at any moment, the flu is a nasty disease, we must never let our guard down and forget to take the necessary measures to prevent it.

Last, but not least, I want to thank all of you who have mentioned me, tagged me, sent me asks and/or stars to my inbox, commented and/or liked what few posts I could do these days, I appreciate it very much and I'll try to reply to you as soon as I can, though I've fallen so far behind that I don't know if I'll be able to find your mentions in my notifications. In any case, thank you very, very much to all of you for thinking about me in my absence. 💗 I'll see you soon, hopefully, with more sim adventures, stay tuned!