#well actually thats the case with every other story i have

[arolesbianism]

Sigh. Nikola why must you be one of the more interesting oni characters. I don't wanna think abt you with your stupid spiky blond hair and your unethical science that mostly just serves to make Jackie more shitty by proxy. But I do. Because you're kind of orbo blorbo. Fuck you Nikola I hope you explode again

[gargyshmub]

DELTARUNE; Gargy's Fairytale Theory

So, lately I've kind of had an itch in the back of my mind about DELTARUNE, more specifically the secret or hidden bosses in the game and a little correlation they all share. I'll try to keep this under 100 pages but i promise nothing (tee hee hee)

If you've played the game to the extent you're looking at a tumblr blog dedicated to it, you're probably familiar with the character's jevil and spamton. These are the two characters coined by the community as "secret bosses", since you have to stray away from the games intended path to find them (in most cases.)

When you defeat spamton in his 'NEO form', a neat little song will play with his dialogue "a real boy!", this is a nod to the fable/fairytale "pinochio" I'm sure everyone's familiar with. It's a story about a doll that comes to life in search of becoming 'a real boy'. This corrilation made me realize there are A LOT of similarity's between pinochio and spamton. The strings, his regular form being a mockup of a doll, even his goal to become "big", its almost like becoming a 'real boy'. He knows he's not 'real', and just like at the end of pinochio, he too becomes renewed (reneo'd).

This made me wonder if the other secret boss, Jevil, represented something other than the Joker card. Then I realized whenever he was hit in his fat empty head it actually sprung out like a jack-in-the-box. I initially discarded this since it wasn't really a fable or fairy-tale, but if you do some digging you'll find it actually is!!!@! back in the 1400's somewhat, the jack in the box was originally named 'The Devil in the Box', essentially it's a story about a man who trapped a devil in a boot in order to save a village in france at the time, kinda like that one story about the court jester who got locked away by his magician friend in order to save their kingdom (haha. hahahahha. thats from deltarune. hahaha.) just to run home my point, jack-in-the-box; Devil in the box. Jack; Devil. What way could you fuse them together? Dack? Jackil? maybe some other 3rd way that has some importance to Yea thats right you know you've always known its Jevil.

Obviously, in deltarune fashion, its easy to overthink most elements in the story. Granted, toby will make an entire 2nd game about a hypothetical character you've never met but no you've only ever POSSIBLY met through a 1/100 chance door where he'll show you his asshole and then disappear into a million pieces, but yea, it's easy to make certain correlations that aren't even really there. In this case however I'd say that there's one more correlation that seals the deal that makes this theory WORTH theorizing.

Yea gaster. even though he's not even technically a character yet, every piece of information regarding him seems to lead people to believe he's not only the narrator at the beginning of the game, but he's also the 'man' behind the tree (since the way you find 'his sprite' in undertale is almost exactly similar ['theres a room in-between, theres a room, in-between']). I'm assuming you know what there is to know about gaster so im not gonna go into it, so onto the correlation.

I've read before someone talking about how gaster represents easter eggs in video games, not only physically (egghead) but metaphorically (the way you find him, his implied involvment with the secret bosses, the fact he gives you an '''''EGG''''' when you DO find him). Well if he is technically involved with the secret bosses, wouldn't that make him a fable too? I'm here to tell you he is. he is HUMPTY DUMPTY from SECOND GRADE FAIRY TALE PLAY.

I've already gone over his physical and metaphorical symbolism relating to eggs, but the story of humpty dumpty is also very, haha, hahahaha, hahahhahahaha

Humpty dumpty sat on a wall (The Core)

Humpty dumpty took a big fall ("Fell into his own creation")

All the kings horses and all the kings men (Who did gaster work for again?)

Couldn't put Humpty together again ("He was shattered across time and space")

What could this mean? for the future it means that if this theory is right, EVERY secret boss we meet is gonna represent not only a lightworld object, but an actual FAIRTY TALE, a FABLE. I mean, how many fables are out there. I know theres one in particular, one that the game is named after, one that has to do with an ANGEL. an ''''ANGEL'''' with ''''TATTERED WINGS''''''.

but then again idk

EDIT: ALSO LITTLE MISS MUFFET THINK ABOUT THAT UNDER-HEADS LITTLE MISS MUFFET SAT ON HER TUFFET

Last edit: also this has no grounds as an actual theory but uhhh that mf that made the Undertale RED boss fight got hired on the team. Huh. I wonder what Red was a reference to. Huh.

[edsloveydove]

I Have Always Seen You

pairing: eddie munson x chubby female reader

summary: of course the boy i've known since 3rd grade, the one i've loved since 7th grade, would be the one to break my heart. i never thought he would be the one to fix it too...

warnings: bullying, fatphobia, use of the word pig towards reader once, falling off a bike, blood and cut knee from falling off said bike, self-doubt and sort of self-hate i guess, cursing, mentality that reader wouldn't be 'missed' (idk if thats a warning but just in case), no use of y/n, underage drinking, reader has an older brother for sake of the story (i gave him a really basic/common name), thoughts and flashbacks are in italics!! nickanames/pet names (shortcake, princess, honey, sweetheart), reader is at least a bit shorter than eddie, very poorly edited, talks of the demobats and upside down, again like very badly edited, lemme know if i missed anything, i'm sure i have!

word count: 9k+

notes: my first fic guys and it turned into this 9,000 word monster! wild! anyway, this might be trash i honestly don't know, i have no perception of it, pls let me know what you think!! also, this story is told in first person point of view so it uses 'i, me, myself' and all that, idk how i feel about it though tbh. uuuuh, enjoy!!

DON'T REPOST MY WRITING OR SHARE IT TO OTHER PLATFORMS (including mentioning it in tiktok comment sections and stuff like that pls) THIS IS MY WRITING, DON'T STEAL IT PLEASE!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The sweltering midwestern heat was hitting Hawkins, Indiana early this year. School had only been out for a few weeks and it was already hot enough to have the city pool passing the max capacity damn near every day. 

Luckily for me, I had been able to successfully avoid going every time my friends have asked me to join them. Until now. 

“C’mon, it’s gonna be so much fun! Steve’s parents are gone again, like usual, so it’ll just be us and a few other friends!” Robin tries to convince me through the phone.  

“Robin, I never believe ‘just us and a few friends’, because it is ne-”

“It’s never just a few friends, I know. But this time it really will be just a few people. Like, actually just a few people. After everything that happened during spring break and all that, Steve really just wants the main guys there. There’s not gonna be any crazy partying, we’re gonna swim and relax, that’s it.”

“I don’t know, I might be busy tomorrow,” I attempt an excuse. 

“Then we’ll move it to when you’re free. We really want you there, you haven’t gone to any of our movie nights or other hangouts yet,” Robin points out while saying my name softly. “Is it something else? Is there someone you don’t want there?” 

Robin isn’t entirely wrong, there is something else that’s keeping me from joining my friends. And technically it does have to do with someone, but not in the way she thinks. And that someone happens to be none other than the Eddie Munson. 

I’ve known Eddie for many years. My older brother was one of his best friends while growing up having met in elementary school. James was in the grade above Eddie, and the one to introduce him to D&D, eventually passing on the title of Hellfire Club President to him as well. I was always in the background, hoping my brother would let me learn how to play just so I could impress him and his friends. 

While they were occupying the basement, getting pizza and bottles of Coke every other Saturday for their stupid role-playing game, I was in my room reading trashy romance novels and out riding my bike to the library in hopes to seem cool when I came back late at night. 

By the time I got to high school, it was James’ second to last year before he went off to college in Chicago on his big-shot football scholarship he managed to snag before he was even a senior. And yes, James was a Hellfire nerd and a star-athlete, so no one messed with their little club while he was there. Eddie was in his sophomore year, already antsy to graduate and move on to greater things. 

I was just the outcast that didn’t even have a group. It didn’t matter that I was the captain of the football team’s little sister, I never made any friends because I never tried to. 

Needless to say, yeah, Eddie and I had some history and maybe things got brought up when Vecna was trying to take over the world that might have been better left untouched. And maybe the idea of seeing him again brings butterflies to my stomach while also making my gut sink. 

“No, it's not that. I just…I guess I just haven’t been feeling it since…since yanno,” I say, half heartedly. 

Robin voices her understanding and tells me to just call back when I make a decision on if I would go or not. I promise her I will and hang up the phone. It’s not like I didn’t want to see them, because truly I did but it also wasn’t a complete lie when I told her I hadn’t been feeling quite right since the Venca situation. 

It was a really traumatic and horrible experience for everyone involved, and really astonishing that everyone made it out alive. 

‘Maybe I should just go…but what if it’s horrible? I know none of my lovely friends would ever say anything to me about it, but I just can’t stand the thought of them seeing me in a swimsuit, especially Eddie.’ I shake my head at the thought. ‘What a stupid thing to think, god, we all nearly died and I’m worried about my stomach in a swimsuit, how shallow is that? I guess some things just never change, no matter the life threatening situation…’

I go about my nighttime routine, washing my face and making sure no lights have been left on around the house. I say goodnight to my mother and fall right asleep. Or, I try to at least. 

But my mind keeps me up for much longer than I would have hoped. 

‘It would be a good time, though. Have a couple of beers, spend the night in one of Steve’s nice guest bedrooms. I wouldn’t even have to swim, I could just say I’m on my period or something. Ugh, but Robin knows that I always swam even on my period when we were younger. I’ll just wear a suit under my clothes and pretend the water is too cold even though it’s the peak of summer? Yeah, that should work. I can’t imagine anyone will care that much anyway if I’m not in the pool with them. I really do miss my friends.’

~ 

The next morning I call Robin and tell her I’ll be there tonight. She squeals in delight and tells me how happy she’ll be to see me.

Now it was just time to pick out an outfit, should be simple enough, right? 

Well, after leaving it to the last second and now only having about 15 minutes to get to Steve’s when it’s already a five minute drive, having half of my closet strewn about my room doesn’t seem like a very good place to be at. 

I finally sigh and opt for a swim suit from the summer before that I never wore, a green one piece with a wrapped sort of style for the top portion, and black cut off shorts and an old t-shirt that fits comfortably loose over it. 

I grab my keys and kiss my mother on the forehead, reminding her I wouldn’t be back till the next morning. 

Several shouts of my name reach my ears once I reach Steve’s backyard, it does bring a small smile to my face knowing I’ve been missed just as much as I’ve missed them. 

“You’re actually here, I’m so happy to see you!” Nancy says pulling me in for a hug, Robin joining on top, squishing us all together. 

“Yeah, yeah, I know it’s been a while. I’m sorry.” 

“No, you don’t have to be sorry, it’s been a really hard year,” Nancy says sincerely. 

Steve comes up for a hug next, squishing me for dear life, I could feel him about to try to lift me up and spin me around so I pull away rather abruptly. 

“Alright, alright, it’s nice to see you, too, Steve.”

He answers with a kiss to the cheek and makes me promise that I’ll come to the next hangout and every one after that. I see Jonathan and he waves with a small awkward smile. 

Finally my eyes meet Eddie’s. 

~

“James! James! C’mon, come outside and play with me!” It was nearing the end of summer before James would go back to school for his 8th grade year and I would be going into 6th grade. 

“Not right now, can’t you see that I’m busy? I’m too old to play outside anyway,” my brother rolls his eyes. 

I hop down the stairs so I can see the basement fully now. Spotting all of my brother's friends huddled around our dinky old card table while he has books and notepads sprawled on his end. 

“Well, can I at least play your game with you guys? I’m sure I can learn it fast!” I beam, faking confidence in hopes to sway them. 

“No offense, shortcake, but it’s probably too confusing for you. Besides, we’re right in the middle of a campaign, it would be too hard to add in another character out of the blue right now,” Eddie says with a chuckle, like the idea that I could play is too amusing to even consider. 

Naturally, I take full offense. 

“Fine! You’re all so annoying, I didn’t even want to play with you anyway. Especially not with someone who has a buzzcut!” I stick my tongue out at them and run away, but not before I can hear them laughing. 

Sitting alone in my room I know it was childish of me, especially for my age. James was probably right, he was too old to be outside playing tag with his sister. I was too old to be throwing a tantrum like this over some friends wanting to spend time with each other without one’s little sister hanging around. 

~

“Hey, Munson.” 

Eddie nods his head in greeting and goes back to talking with Jonathan. Well, that’s honestly about as much interaction as I expected to get from him tonight. 

“Alright, let’s get this party started!” Robin exclaims, dragging you toward the cooler filled with ice and drinks, I grab a Sprite to start with. 

2 hours later and my Sprite is still mostly untouched and it’s now gone lukewarm. The others are in the pool splashing and playing chicken, I sit on the side with my feet dangling into the shallow end, watching as they fool around and laugh. Giggles and quiet laughs leave my lips on occasion with them. 

“You should get in, the water’s really nice!” Nancy says. 

“Yeah! Strip for us and get in here,” Robin adds, making everyone laugh. 

“You guys just want to get me out of my clothes, don’t you?” I play it off, shaking my head slightly. Giggles erupt again. I excuse myself to the bathroom after pulling my legs out of the pool. 

Closing and locking the door behind me I look at myself in the mirror.

‘I should just get in the pool, shouldn’t I? I do feel like I’m missing out on what could be a lot of fun. And it wouldn’t hurt to wash all this sweat off of me. I could just keep my shirt on, I have an extra change of clothes as backup anyway.’ 

I finish my business and leave the bathroom. 

After turning the corner to go back to the pool I run straight into something firm, nearly being toppled over before hands are at my forearms to keep me from doing so. Seeing dark curls fanning across this “something’s” shoulders and several patches of dark ink on its bare skin, I immediately know I have just run head first into Eddie. Great. 

“Sorry, I wasn’t looking where I was going,” I murmur, keeping my eyes pointed down. 

“It’s alright, shortcake. No harm done right?” he says, adjusting his head to try to catch my eyes. 

I nod my head and pull away from his hands that still rest gently on my arms. 

“Hey, hey, what’s up? You’re so quiet tonight, is everything okay?” 

I nod again and pull away harder, rushing out the door to get back to the pool, ignoring his call of my name and a request to “just hold on a second.” 

Pulling my shorts off quickly, I step up to the pool and begin to wade into the water before Robin stops me. 

“Your shirt! You don’t want the chlorine to ruin it!” 

My heart thumps, thinking of how I can handle this. My mouth opens to say something but before I can, Robin cuts me off. 

“Just take it off, no one’s gonna make fun of you for being in your swimsuit and if they do I’ll beat them up for you and then we’ll all collectively agree to throw them out of the group. And don’t try to tell me that’s not what it is, I can see it all over your face. You’re allowed to have fun and go swimming, I don’t like to see you excluding yourself, no matter the reason,” she says. 

Of course she would see right through any lie I could throw her way. That’s just how Robin is. No matter how clumsy she can be, she really is observant. Not only that, but she’s right. Nobody cares and if they do, that’s their problem. 

I rip off my shirt and dive into the pool trying to minimize the time in which people could see me without it. Immediately finding Steve’s legs I yank his ankles so he falls backwards into the water with an unnecessarily loud screech. 

It makes the rest of us laugh loudly until Steve comes back up for air with a thirst for vengeance. He chases me around the pool, not for long considering he’s such a strong swimmer and I’m really not trying very hard to get away from him, and catches me easily. His arms wrap around my waist and I cringe as his hands nudge my stomach, scolding myself for the action right after. Steve doesn’t care about my stomach, if he did, he wouldn’t be my friend. 

“That really wasn’t very nice,” Steve says and starts lifting me out of the water. 

“Steve, hey. Steve! Steve, no, I’m too heavy! Stevie, no! Bad Stevie! Bad!”

I’m thrown in the air as far as he can get me and I splash back down. 

I come up spluttering for breath, “Oh, you are so dead, Harrington!” 

All at once the rest of us are splashing and dunking him over and over, until he pleads mercy. Shrieks and squeals of glee and what might be considered laughter fill the air as everyone gets their turn being thrown into the water. 

Eddie comes back out from the house and cannonballs in the middle of our ‘hate on Steve’ fest. 

Eventually I end up back on the side of the pool in my shirt with just my feet in, this time so I can enjoy a fresh soda and mellow out a little, not to make myself smaller. Nancy and Jonathan have called it a night already, leaving Steve, Eddie, and Robin in or by the pool with me. 

“I never noticed this scar? Where did you get it?” Robin points to my knee. 

~ 

The nice old librarian put a hand on my shoulder gently to get my attention, telling me the library would be closing soon and it was best I head home, I hadn’t realized how late it already was. I pack everything together as fast as I can, quickly saying goodnight and unlocking my bike, trying my hardest to race home before the sun sets. 

The wheels of my rickety bicycle pump faster and faster and in my haste I bump over a high curb without realizing, flying off and onto the pavement. 

Tears spring to my eyes as air is sucked in through my teeth. I take a look at my knee and see a small dribble of blood seeping down it, my hands have little scrapes all over, spotted with little beads of red. 

Not the worst I could have gotten from a bike incident, but bad enough to keep me from being able to ride the rest of the way home. It’s not far, but so much for getting back before the street lights turn on. 

About 15 minutes later I make it into our backyard, dropping the two wheeled contraption from hell into the grass and stumbling through the door, all while sniffling back sobs. 

“Oh hey, shortcake! James was starting to get worried about you, you really shouldn’t walk alone at night yanno? Next time ju-” Eddie cuts himself off after seeing the state I’m in. Of course he had to be the one to see me like this. Anyone else could have been sent on snack duty tonight, but it just had to be him. 

“Oh my god, what happened?” He walks up to me. 

I shrug my shoulders and look away. I catch a glimpse of how bad my knees and hands have gotten on the walk home. Blood drips down both knees, my left knee looking significantly worse than the right. Dirt and pebbles cover my palms along with streaks of crimson. 

“Don’t do that, sweetheart. Tell me what happened? Please?” 

I still don’t say anything, fresh, hot tears welling up and already spilling out. I refuse to let stupid Eddie Munson see me like this, all it would be is more leverage to make fun of me with. 

He pulls my hand gently until I’m sitting down. Eddie appears in front of me with a first aid kit a few seconds later, carefully cleaning the gashes on my knees and scrapes on my hands with alcohol wipes. 

“Did,” he lets out a shuddering breath, “Did someone hurt you?” 

“No, god no Eddie, I just-, god this is so embarrassing, I just fell off of my bike is all,” I mutter, not really wanting him to hear the words as they come out. 

“S’ not embarrassing, stuff like that happens. I just wish you would have told me, here I was thinking the boys and I were going to have to band together to cause hell for our favorite little goblin,” he says. 

“You’re just trying to make me feel better, you guys wouldn’t really do that, I guess James might. Most of you guys don’t even really like me that much anyway, you don’t have to lie,” I whisper.

“That’s not true! Of course we would stick up for you!” he says like he’s shocked that I would think the opposite. 

I just shrug my shoulders again and wipe my eyes, still avoiding looking him in the face. 

“Here, let me help you up to your room. That can’t feel good to walk on,” he pulls me up from the chair and goes to lift me into his arms. I jump out of his reach before he can. 

“It’s okay, I got it. Just- you better get back downstairs before they start worrying. I’ll take care of myself.” 

“What? No, you’re basically limping just standing here, shortcake, let me carry you, it’ll only take a minute?” He phrases it like a question. Asking but also sort of demanding. 

The idea is actually really nice, and I want to say yes to it. It would be like when the prince finally gets the princess in all those books I’ve read. Eddie could sweep me off of my feet and whisk me away. 

But I know better, I know that he wouldn’t be able to lift me. Even if he could he wouldn’t so much as glance at me, again, I’m just his friend's little sister. Here only because this is where she lives. 

“No thank you, I’m okay. Go ahead and go back to your game, I’m sure they miss you already. Nobody would even notice if I were gone, but they’ll practically riot without you,” I try to cover how deeply I believe those words with a laugh as I wobble away and halfway up the stairs before he can stop me. 

~

“Um, I guess I don’t really remember. It’s probably just one of those super old scars you forget are even there,” I say, even though I recall the night I got it vividly. 

Eddie’s eyes meet mine from the other side of the pool and they look almost…hurt at the possibility that I might not remember that day. Well, he didn’t get to feel hurt about it. He made it clear that he doesn’t care how I feel when we were in the upside down. 

“Hmmm, yeah, I have, like, tons of those actually,” Robin says, “This one is from my cat, Steven, and this one-” 

“You have a cat named Steven?” I cut her off. She gives me a look that says ‘duh’. 

“But what about Steve? Like human Steve? Was this before or after you became friends? And how has this never come up before?” I practically shriek. 

“Believe me, it has come up before. And yes, before she tells you otherwise, it was after we became friends,” Steve says, settling down beside me while throwing his arm around my shoulders. 

“That is not true! I found him outside the mall before we became friends! We may have been working together at that point, but we were not friends yet!” Robin shouts. 

“We were friends, she’s just embarrassed that she named her cat after me,” Steve whispers in my ear, making me giggle like a schoolgirl. 

Even though I’ve never seen Steve romantically, he still had the ability to reduce me to feet kicking and hair twirling. 

“What’s wrong with you, Munson?” Steve asks, noticing the scowl covering his face that usually carries a bright smile. 

Eddie shakes his head, “Nothing man, just thinking about how I don’t have a beer in my hand right now.” 

~ 

A call of my name breaks my gaze away from the mirror. 

“You almost ready? It’s time to go!” James yells, entering my room. “Hey! You look great! It almost feels like I’m sending you off to prom already,” he says wiping fake tears from his cheeks. 

I shove him in the chest and readjust my hair and the straps to my dress for what feels like the millionth time. It was a rather simple looking thing considering I had to sew it myself since the only dresses even near my size were too far out of theme for the 8th grade Winter Snowball or they were simply just ugly. 

Light blue and white fabric lays delicately across my shoulders and down to my knees, matched with white slip on shoes and silver snowflake jewelry. 

“You look really nice, seriously. I know how nervous you are, but it’s gonna be okay, I promise,” my brother assures me, slapping my shoulder much harder than necessary to push me towards the door, “Now it’s time to get your butt moving, let’s go!” 

When we arrive at the dance I immediately catch eyes with Robin and speed walk to her. James goes wherever he's needed for volunteering. 

After about 45 minutes the first slow song of the night comes on as I sit contently by myself at the far end of the bleachers. I wasn’t sad to not be dancing with anyone, I was honestly sort of relieved that I hadn’t had to dance all night. But watching all the couples on the dance floor does make my heart ache just a little. 

“I haven’t seen you dance all night, what’s that about?” 

“Why are you here?” 

“Ouch, shortcake, I don’t even get a hello? And what, I can’t come volunteer with your brother?” Eddie says, fake hurt painting his face. 

“It just doesn’t seem like you, I guess.” 

He sits down next to me leaving at least enough room for another person to sit between us. He hands me an unopened juice box. 

“Seriously though, why aren’t you out there? You don’t have someone you wanna get cozied up with on the dancefloor?” He wiggles his eyebrows at me in his typical annoying Eddie way. 

I roll my eyes, as my stomach twists with shame. He’s mocking me, isn’t he? 

“Nope. I’m okay with it though. Honestly I was perfectly happy just sitting here. Until you showed up that is,” I say with a shrug. 

“Oh really? Well, gosh, who made you such a sour fart?” he laughs as I push him in the arm. 

“Alright, c’mon then. Pity party is over, let's go do this,” Eddie holds out his hand and raises a brow when all I do is look at it confused. “Let’s go dance, shortcake, you should at least once before it’s over.” 

“Um- I-” I’m at a loss for words. There’s no way he’s being anything but friendly but my stupid heart skips too many beats to count. 

“Here, I need to go check on James and see how the other volunteers are doing. While I take care of that, I want you to sit here and decide if you want to dance with me or not. Of course, I won’t make you do anything you don’t wanna, but if you’re up for it, I’m here,” he says, bouncing back to the drinks and snacks table. I smile giddily at his back and stay sitting. 

By the time the last song of the night played I was still in the exact same spot I had been for nearly 2 hours, waiting for Eddie to come back. 

Immediately after he left, I knew I wanted to dance with him. Of course I would. I’ve known him since I was in 4th grade and have had a crush on him for a year now. All I had to do was wait a few minutes and I would get to live out a fairytale dream. Dancing across the room in a flowey dress with the guy I liked. Of course it would be strictly platonic on his end but it could mean something more to me silently. 

So there I sat, with my empty juice box, tapping my foot in excitement. The first slow song ended and there was no sign of Eddie, but I was sure he just caught up with volunteer work. After the next 3 songs played I began to doubt myself slightly. 

‘Maybe he hadn’t actually wanted to dance like it had seemed. But he looked really sincere when asking me. Yeah. And even if Eddie is just a regular teenage boy, and he can definitely be a jerk sometimes, he’s much sweeter and kinder than most. He wouldn’t leave me hanging like that. He’ll be back any minute now, I’m sure.’ 

By the time 11 more songs had played, I knew he wasn’t coming back. Tears were smearing my mascara while I sat as still as possible on the bleachers, not wanting to draw any attention to myself.  

Of course he wasn’t being serious. He just wanted to tease me like usual, the only difference was this time it went too far. This time he was cruel about it. He could have just told me he didn’t mean it. Instead he strung me along and had me sitting here like a lovesick puppy for an hour straight. 

Who was I kidding? Eddie couldn’t be interested in me. He was my brother's best friend and had seen me grow up. I was just his friend’s chubby little sister. Wearing a dress that doesn’t sparkle and shine like all the others’, sitting alone and pouting like a baby. 

He probably thought I would crush his feet if I accidentally stepped on them. 

After persevering through another hour of horror, James finds me in my corner ready to head home. 

“All ready to go?” he asks jovially like he always seems to be. 

“Yes.” 

James picks up on my mood right away, but I’m already halfway to the car before he can say anything. 

“Okay, uh, I gotta clean up some stuff still but here,” he throws me his car keys when I turn back around, “Go get the car started yeah?” 

I nod and head out to the car when I see Eddie jogging up to the doors after me. My steps speed up hoping for all hell to avoid him. He calls my name but I don’t look back or slow down, in fact, the only thing it succeeds in doing is making me walk faster. 

My hands shake as I try to slip the key into the driver’s side door handle. Warm hands settle on my wrists. 

“Holy shit, I am so sorry, shortcake. I was so excited to dance with you, I really was, I just got caught up in helping another volunteer with something and lost track of time. I didn’t mean to forget you there all alone, I swear on everything. I know how excited you were for tonight and I am so sorry. I didn’t realize how long I had been gone until everyone started leaving and then I saw you get up and realized what I’d done, please forgive me,” he rambles off almost too quickly to understand. 

I expect tears but all I get is a deep rooted feeling of shame and anger. Ashamed by the fact that I thought he would come back and angry at myself for sitting there hopelessly when I could’ve danced with Robin at least. 

“Please, look at me. Please tell me you at least got to dance with someone else, right? You had a good time? Please tell me you at least had fun,” he pleads. 

A scoff escapes me as I whirl on him. 

“No, I didn’t dance with someone else, I sat there and I waited for you. I waited for you the whole time, and I guess that was my first mistake wasn’t it, huh? I believed you. I really thought you meant what you said to me.” 

I rip my arms out of hold. 

“You know what’s funny, too? I was actually having a really good time before you showed up. I told you as much earlier, even. I was perfectly happy to sit by myself, considering that’s how I spend most of my time anyway. I was really enjoying just watching the lights and the twirl of dresses, alone. I was overjoyed to just sit and watch Robin dance with her friends. And you had to come and- and lie to me! You made me feel special for fuck’s sake.” 

His eyes flash with guilt and he must have finally realized how much he hurt me. 

“I get that I’m not the prettiest and skinniest girl and I know that most of those kids don’t even know my name, but you do! You know me. You know me and you still forgot about me,” I pause and take a deep breath, “Do you remember what I said that night when I fell off my bike?” 

Eddie shakes his head.

“Nobody would even notice if I were gone. Nobody, not even you, I guess. You forgot about me not even 5 minutes after making me feel like the most special girl in that whole damn room. And that was really mean, Eddie. I hope you, at least, have a good rest of your night,” I step into the car and start the engine.

~ 

Steve plops down next to me holding 4 cans of beer, one for each of us. 

“I’m really happy I came tonight, thank you, for inviting me and not forgetting about me after I kinda disappeared,” I say quietly. 

Steve pats my back while Robin says something along the lines of ‘duh, of course we would never forget about you.’ 

Eddie stays silent, watching me closely. 

I put my drink on the ground beside me and lay on my back, pulling my shirt down to make sure it covers me still. I start to count the stars, just to keep my brain occupied. My eyes drift shut, my mind choosing to visit yet another memory tonight.  

~ 

It was James’ graduation party. All we had were a couple tables set up with snacks in the backyard and a bonfire, nothing too fancy. I made a simple ‘Happy Graduation!’ banner to hang across the gate for everyone to see, too. 

I’m wearing a plain white sundress and converse, I knew I would be running back and forth from the backyard and the kitchen too much for heels to be sensible. Making sure there’s enough drinks and food and ice for everyone was my job tonight. The sun is still up, melting the ice and warming every drink out here. 

James calls my name softly, “You can quit running around and tending to every little need. Come hang out with everyone for a little bit. Please?” 

I set down the metal tub where drinks are kept and walk over to sit around the fire with him and his usual friends. New faces have popped up over the years, but many stayed the same. Danny Williams, a junior who may or may not have been my first kiss when we happened to both show up at the same party and ended up playing spin the bottle together, Jason Carver, a freshman who appeared promising on the football team before switching to basketball instead, Michael Brown, a senior who’s been in the little Hellfire Group since the beginning. There are several others I don’t recognize and even more that I do. 

Of course, Eddie is there too. I just haven’t really…acknowledged him in…in a really long time. 

I haven’t necessarily been giving him the silent treatment, but I stopped entertaining the conversations he always seemed to start with me. 

Danny greets me with a smile as he sits down next to me. He even pulls his lawn chair a little closer towards mine, grinning slightly while doing so. 

“What can I do for you Danny?” I say. 

“Oh nothing. I just wanted to come sit by you, is all.” Huh. That…that sort of stumps me. 

I didn’t think Danny would even recognize me at the party, and I’m honestly even more surprised that he wanted to talk to me after kissing me. We make small conversation, butting into the rest of the group's discussion once in a while to add an opinion. 

Night had fallen and marshmallows and graham crackers were brought out for s'mores, as well as a couple of 12 packs of beer that someone had brought with them. 

I knew James had gone to several parties to celebrate winning a football game where there had been alcohol, or even just little get-togethers where it was provided. I guess now that it was only soon-to-be seniors and high school graduates, minus myself, left at the party it was time for that portion of the night to begin. 

I stand up to go in and let the others have their fun. 

“Where’re you going?” Danny asks, grabbing my hand lightly, looking up with wide puppy dog eyes. His eyes are a pretty green color. Brown eyes have always been my favorite, though. 

“Oh, I was just going to head in and call it a night. That way you all could have your fun without worrying about me dragging you down.” 

My comment makes his brows furrow, his mouth opens to say something, but he’s cut off. 

“You can stay out here, you know. No one minds having you here and I’m sure dear old James doesn’t care if you partake in a little drink, do you?” Eddie states. When did he get so close to us? 

“Even if I did care she gets to do what she wants, man. As long as you're safe about it, go for it,” James says, patting my back and taking one for himself. 

I’ve never drank before, but what the hell? James was leaving in just a few weeks now and this might be my only chance to try it. It’s certainly one of my last chances to hang out with everyone like this, at least for a while. 

After just 2 cans my tongue had already loosened significantly. Danny and I had been talking and giggling the whole time until he had gotten up to go home since his designated driver was ready to leave. 

“So, you and Danny seem pretty close suddenly?” Eddie phrases it like a question, wanting more information on the subject. 

Usually I would just hum in what could be taken as agreement or disinterest but my mind was running a little slower than normal. 

“Yeah, he and I kinda ran into each other at a party that I kinda crashed with Robin and we ended up, like, kissing and stuff,” I giggled. “But shhhh, don’t tell anyone else.”  

Eddie’s eyes widened, but that could have been a trick of the light. 

“What, uh, what do you mean by ‘and stuff’?” 

“Oh nothing. We just had one teensy tiny kiss because we were playing spin the bottle,” I say, not really thinking about it. 

Now I really know my brain is playing tricks on me because for a second I think Eddie looks pleased with this new knowledge that it didn’t really mean anything. 

“I feel like we haven’t really talked in a long time. What’s, uh, what’s been up, lately?” 

The question itself is awkward, but the way he struggled through it made it even more awkward. 

“I’ve been regular old me, Eddie. Nothing new or exciting. Although I did finish a book last night that really threw me through a loop. Oh! Actually there is something exciting! Do you wanna hear it?” 

He smiles, “Of course I do, shortcake.” 

“Well,” I take another sip of what is now my third beer, “William Gillar and Stacy Johnson have finally graduated!” I let out a squeal. 

Eddie just looks at me confused. 

“Do you have any idea what this means, Eds? I am finally free of those two asshats for the rest of my high school experience! Isn’t that amazing! I mean, it was easier to ignore this year than last year, but god I am so thrilled! No more mean notes from them calling me a pig in my locker and book bag, I can even finally find a table to sit at for lunch instead of hiding in Mr. Steerwell’s class,” I sigh happily. 

“Do you wanna know what else they did? This is so silly! They used to catch me on my walk home from school and steal my library books. How stupid is that? Why would you steal someone’s library books, right? They would run around with it so I would chase after them and then laugh at how my body would jiggle. How funny, right? I am so happy they’re gone, Eds, you have no idea.” 

Eddie has his mouth halfway open, anger flaring in his eyes. But that couldn’t be right, why would he care about a couple of high school bullies. 

“No, that’s not funny or silly. That’s been going on this whole time? And you didn’t tell anyone? God, why wouldn’t you tell someone, sweetheart? That’s horrible,” he says. 

“Meh, it’s just normal high school bully stuff.” I wave my hand in dismissal. 

“No, it’s not. Bullying shouldn’t even be considered normal anyway, but what they did to you? That goes far beyond normal, shortcake. I wish you would have said something. You know James and I would’ve taken care of them for you, right?” 

“Well, it doesn’t really matter now, does it. It’s too late,” I dismiss him and his misplaced worry. Honestly, it was nothing I couldn’t handle. He must have sensed how much I didn’t want to talk about it anymore because he dropped it. 

The night moves quickly after that, people say their goodbyes as James takes over clean up duty, considering I can barely stand up without nearly falling asleep. 

“Eddie, will you take her in and make sure she gets into bed okay?” James asks. 

That’s how I find myself being semi-dragged up the stairs to my bedroom and thrown on the mattress like a sack of potatoes. I don’t think Eddie was half as rough as my brain made it seem, to be honest. 

“Eds?” I whisper looking down at Eddie who’s kneeling by feet, gently taking my shoes off. 

“Yeah?” 

A couple beats of silence pass where I try to figure out how to word what I’m thinking. 

“I forgive you.” His movements stop. “I hope you know that. It’s probably such a silly little thing to even remember but I forgive you for forgetting to dance with me. I probably would have forgotten me, too. And…and I am sorry. I really am, for pushing you away so hard after. It was really stupid of me and I wish I hadn’t. Robin is a good friend, but you’re kind of the closest thing I’ve ever had to a best friend, I think. And I threw that all away over hurt feelings. Puberty, am I right?” I giggle. 

“S’ not silly to remember that. And you weren’t being stupid, sweetheart. You were hurt, you were protecting yourself and I don’t blame you for that. I should never have even walked away from you that night, but I did. And I don’t deserve your forgiveness for it,” Eddie says. 

More words mumble out of his mouth but none of it registers. Soon the noise stops and I feel Eddie’s warm hands pull my shoes all the way off, pushing my legs onto the bed and turning me to lay comfortably on my stomach. 

He must remember that’s my favorite way to sleep. 

My mind must really hate me because I swear, right before I fall asleep, I feel lips pressing gently to my forehead while a guitar calloused hand pushes hair away from my eyes. 

Of course, that didn’t actually happen because that’s not something Eddie would do. Right? Yeah, he wouldn’t…

~ 

A timid shake to my shoulder pulls me from my dozing. 

“Hey, shortcake, it’s time for you to go in.” 

There’s only one person who’s ever called me by that nickname. 

“Hm, it’s been a while since you’ve called me that…Eds.” 

I don’t know what made me decide to use his nickname. It never seemed right to use it after we drifted so far apart when James left. 

Eddie helps pull me to my feet. 

‘Hmmm, he’s always been a lot stronger than he looks. I barely even lifted myself up for him.’ 

“Oh, now you wanna be all friendly again? Using a nickname and everything? What’s this all about, huh?” Eddie says, steadying me with his calloused hands when my legs wobble.   

My brows furrow, “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“Earlier, when we were in the house. You practically ran away from me. I mean, it’s just that we…we haven’t seen each other since we went into the upside down. I thought maybe,” he lets out a long breath. “Maybe things had changed or something, I guess. I was hoping we could talk about it after we all got out but you’ve been avoiding everyone.” 

“And why is that? Why do you think things would have changed Eddie?” 

~

“No! No, no, no! Edward Munson, if you cut that rope, so help me god!” 

“You know I always love when you use my full name.” 

And the bastard cuts the rope. 

The next thing I know, he’s out of the trailer doing something entirely too heroic and the exact amount of stupid he always is. 

Before I can think I shove Dustin out of the trailer, the one not in the upside down, and send him to go help Lucas. 

“No! We need to help him! Can’t you see that he needs help!” 

“I know Dustin, I know. That’s why I’m staying here. But I need you to go find Lucas and Erica and check on Max. There are others who still need our help, Henderson. Please, listen to me and go help them.” 

I turn back into the trailer before he can disagree again, locking the door to make sure he doesn’t follow. Without second guessing, I jump through the portal, landing somewhat safely on my side. 

I manage to find a bike and just a few minutes later I’m riding as fast as I can towards the bat tornado that Eddie stands in the middle of. 

“Eddie you dumb jerk, you better not be getting yourself killed!” I scream at the top of my lungs. His eyes catch mine as a look of horror crosses his face. 

“Why the hell did you follow me? I specifically told you not to!” 

“Yeah, well I specifically told you not to cut the rope!” 

We fight off the bats as best we can until they all suddenly drop to the ground. 

Eddie and I stand breathing hard, our brains trying to catch up with all of what just happened. Eddie turns to me, a grin beginning to form. 

I punch him as hard as I can in the chest. And then I do it again, and then again and again, until I’m pounding my fists against his chest over and over again. 

“What the hell?! Honey, stop, you’re gonna hurt yourself!” 

I choke on hiccupping sobs as hot tears overflow past my lashes. 

“Don’t you ever do something like that again! Ever!” 

Eddie grabs my wrists to keep me from hitting him anymore. I keep trying until I realize his hold on me is too strong. 

“Princess, you gotta stop. I don’t want to see you hurt anymore, please stop.” 

He wraps his arms around me, stroking the back of my hair, pressing soft kisses to my forehead. 

“It’s okay, sweetheart, it’s okay. We’re okay, I promise.” 

“That was not okay, Eddie. Not okay!” I tell him looking up into his eyes. 

“I’m sorry, I really am. But look, we did it!” 

He looks down at me thoughtfully. His eyes flit down to my lips. My breath catches. 

He couldn’t possibly be… 

His lips are on mine. And Eddie Munson is kissing me. 

Both of his hands are on the side of my face, rubbing his thumbs softly across the apples of my chubby cheeks. 

I pull away, “What do you think you’re doing?” 

“Kissing my shortcake,” he says with a smirk while I grimace at the phrase. He laughs at the face I make and kisses me again. 

I kiss back harder this time, getting lost in all things Eddie. The way his hair feels soft even despite being so dirty. His lips are somehow minty. He smells like smoke and old books. 

My heart soars. This has to be proof, then. Eddie must think of me the way I think of him. I can’t imagine ever kissing someone with this much passion if it didn’t mean something more. I smile into the kiss.

Footsteps sound behind where we stand and Eddie pushes me off of him, placing several feet between us. I look at him confused and hurt by his sudden change in behavior. He refuses to meet my eyes. He even wipes the back of his hand across his mouth, looking straight ahead at Steve, Robin and Nancy appearing in front of us. 

Oh.

He’s too embarrassed to let his new friends see him with the big girl? Is that what it is? Does he suddenly regret kissing me? Was it just a heat of the moment type of deal, then? I was the closest human thing, so he settled on me for a little ‘yay the world didn’t end’ kiss?

In my whole life, I don’t think anything has hurt as much as that did. 

~

An uncomfortable amount of silence fills the air.. 

“Things got weird after James left, but you know that. We both felt it, even though we tried to ignore it. Jason started to act like he ran the damn school even though we were friends at one point. I never saw you because we were never at your house anymore. Then I got held back and we basically had every class together. Then I got held back again and you graduated. I missed you. I really, really missed you,” he says the last part quietly. Almost like he was afraid for me to hear it. I hold back a scoff.

“I missed you so much, it’s ridiculous. I just wanted my shortcake back. My sweetheart, my princess, my honey,” he laughs to himself, I stay quiet. “God, I was such a jerk to you growing up. And not because ‘I had a crush on you’ because that’s bullshit, guys shouldn’t be allowed to be mean to girls with the excuse of it being ‘romantic’. I wish I had treated you better, been a little friendlier. I never realized how much you meant to me until your brother’s graduation.” 

He takes his eyes away from his feet to glance at me. 

“Do you remember that night? It was your first time drinking and you got so sleepy I had to tuck you into bed. You had told me about you and Danny at that party and it made me jealous. I’d never really felt jealous before, certainly not like that at least. It made me realize how deep my feelings for you went.” 

I remain silent, partly because I didn’t want to interrupt him when this is the most honest and vulnerable he’s ever been, out of respect, and partly because I was utterly confused and angered by what he was saying and claiming.

“You forgave me for leaving you alone at the dance, even though I never deserved to be forgiven for that. I didn’t even know how badly you were being bullied at school until you told me, that’s not a person who deserves to be forgiven.” 

A soft laugh and a pause. “I guess what I’m saying is…is I wish things had, in fact, changed after Vecna. And I know, that’s probably not something you want to hear because I know it’s not the same for you but I figure if you’re not gonna talk to me anyway, I may as well tell you, right?” 

He takes a step towards the house but I don’t let him get far. 

“What do you mean it’s ‘not the same for me’?” 

“Well obviously you’ve been ignoring me since I kissed you so, clearly it wasn’t something you wanted.” He shrugs his shoulders. “And that’s okay. I’m not saying you have to be with me or anything, I’m just saying…I don’t know what I’m saying.” 

“I’ve been ignoring you?” I ask, dumbfounded by his idiocy. 

“Well, yeah. You haven’t even been answering the walkie.” 

“And you think that was because I didn’t want to kiss you? Not because, oh, I don’t know, maybe the fact that the second Nance and the others showed up you shoved me away from you? It couldn’t have been because it was obvious you couldn’t stand the thought of being seen with me?” 

Eddie’s face drains of color. 

“I can’t help but see now that this is all you think I deserve. A quick kiss when no one can see, right? A little making out before someone can figure who you’re with, huh?” 

“No! That is not at all what that was! I can’t believe you would think that. I pushed you away so you wouldn’t be seen with me!” he shouts, cutting me off. 

“What?” 

“The whole town wanted me for murder! Murder! They thought I was running a cult that killed my friend as a sacrifice! My friend! I didn’t want you to be tied to that anymore than you already were, so I pushed you off before the others could see. If someone, somehow went yapping about a girlfriend of mine and things went sideways when we got out of the upside down, you might have gone down with me and I couldn’t let that happen. I just couldn’t. I was going to tell you all of this as soon as I could but you never let me get the chance, and I see why now. I am so sorry it looked like I was embarrassed to be with you, but that will never be the case with me.” 

He takes my face in his hands and looks me directly in the eyes. 

“You are single-handedly the most beautiful person I have ever met. Inside and out. You have always cared for me and the old Hellfire Club. Don’t think I didn’t know it was you sending cookies on our campaign nights, even after graduating. I remember when I showed up at your house looking for James because some older kids had taken my lunch money in middle school, little you went after them yourself and did one helluva job doing it. You sat me down and cleaned me up. Gave me peas to put on my forehead.”  

It was like a forgotten memory was just pulled up by his words, I did remember that. 

“I could never be embarrassed by you, ever. I don’t care what people think. I…I love you. And I love your hair, and I love your eyes, and I love your laugh, and I love your stomach and your thighs, and I love your mind. I love you and I hope you can see it. I hope…I hope you can see me,” he finishes off in a very quiet whisper, tilting his head down and away from my eyes. 

I place my hands over his that still hold my face. 

“I have always seen you, Eddie Munson. Always.” 

His head jolts up to look me in the eyes once more. 

“God, Eddie, I’m so sorry. I know you’re not a horrible person, I should have known, I’m so sorry. God, you were literally being hunted for murder and I was crying about you being embarrassed by me? I’m so fucking sorry.” 

I shake my head and take a deep breath. 

“I love you, I have for so long. I love the way you smile, I love the way you’re not afraid to take up space, I love the way you’re there for Dustin, the way you were there for me countless times. I love you and your horrible music.”

“Hey, now. Watch it.”

I laugh, “I love you and I see you and I’m so sorry.” 

“It’s okay, it’s okay. You’re forgiven, I promise. You didn’t even really need to apologize in the first place.” 

“Yes, I did. Because none of that was fair to you.” 

“And none of that was fair to you, shortcake. It’s okay.” 

I look at his lips, and that’s all the cue Eddie needs to kiss me. Finally. We put our hearts into it, getting lost in each other. Getting lost in our sudden understandings of the other.  

“We’re both really kinda stupid aren’t we? Stupid and oblivious,” I say, chuckling quietly. 

“Oh, definitely. I mean, we’ve known each other for, what, at least ten years and we couldn’t figure this out without a bunch of drama?” 

“It seems very on brand for you actually, you’ve always been one for the dramatics.” 

“I love you.” 

“And I love you.”

[ganondoodle]

as i was awake in the middle of the night for like 2 hours bc i felt sick i had more somewhat random totk thoughts

one being that i really hate how raurus response to concerned zelda is, after sonia died in that almost funny how little impactful it was way, "im sure you are here for a reason" (actually, i hate how often this sentence is used in general to .. idk i guess its supposed to be inspiritational???)

bc what does that mean actually? him saying that to someone who got there absolutely by accident really just sounds like "i dont care go figure it out yourself bc i dont want to think about anything concerning you or your troubles lol" i guess its meant to sound like OOOOH fate has BROUGHT you here bc you have to furfill a role you dont know yet (spoiler its being a sacrifice girl with no personality) and besides me hating the 'inescapable fate' trope in general (at least the way its usually done in these games, which is not to struggle against it but willingly accept whatever you are told and pretend thats good) its really jsut goddamn boring and is really only an excuse to well .. ignore her and her trouble; shouldnt you, if you were actually such a cool guy like the game wants me to believe so bad, do everything in your power to get zelda back to her own world before shes pulled even further into the war you caused now that her only ""mentor"" that could help her get more use of her pretty much useless sudden powers is gone too?? i know shes basically dead wife sonia replacement (can of worms ugh) but it still grinds my gears whenever i think of that cutscene, bc i cant help but hear it as the lamest excuse in existence to not care about her and just kinda .. see what happens which in this case means leave zelda completely on her her own since both rauru and mineru die as well (honestly shouldnt rauru have thought about like .. any plan to defeat gan besides dying himself, given hes the oh so cool and goodest guy king whos only mistake was not stabbing gan the second he stepped into their kathedral castle thing, like even if you had a plan it can still fail but it seemed like he just kinda went in with a handful of people that didnt seem to know each other at all, never got names or faces -or unique voices for that matter- to fight gan face to face inlcuding the girl that came from a different time and had nothing to do with any of this conflict and couldnt even really control her sudden new powers just seems pretty stupid)

thought 2

how totk really feels like botw but for the people who didnt like shiekah tech, its not a sequel, its botw again, but version of only sonau, its like a pokemon game that had two versions but one has weirdly incoherent story and acts like the other never existed jsut as a whole its like retreading the same points but worse, all shiekah tech that was so integral to the world and had such a long history just vanishing and no one caring about any of it like it never happened, HELL the titans were called divine beasts in english but i guess they werent divine or important enough to keep around LOL champions WHO and isntead a never before seen or even heard of race for that matter showing up and planting their ass in every place the shiekah were before, dare i say it feels weirdly manipulative, like either them or some outside force erasing every fact about the ancient shiekah and replace them with sonau stuff bc they are the hot new shit now

this is a point that just doesnt stop bothering me, how the shiekah tech seemed so carefully designed and integrated into botws world and story, its a difficult to keep balance after all, integrating high tech stuff into a medieval setting, but they made it work! and then totk comes around and throws a bunch modern day tech into it puts some vague greenish stone filter on its exterior and call that even better more ancient tech; why did they even bother to make pottery inspired laser shooting spider legged robots so well integrated when they throw a car and rockets into the next game without a thought and call it a day, what was the fucking point

it feels like someone was dead set on having a set of legos thrown into the game it had no place in, if you want players to build whatever they want make a building game instead!! especially if you are just gonna throw it in with seemingly no consideration how out of place it feels togehter with the fACT THAT YOU ALREADY HAD AND ANCIENT HIGH TECH CIVILIZATION WITH A VERY DISTINCT AESTHETIC THAT WAS ALREADY WELL INTEGRATED INTO THE WORLD YOU ARE PLANNING TO REUSE WITH ALOT OF MYSTERY AND UNKOWN STUFF ABOUT THEM TO EXPLORE FURTHER YOU COULD HAVE USED!! but i guess they just "didnt want to play with you anymore" and that so much so that they went out of their way to erase every trace of it, i dont think the words shiekah tech are ever used in the game, and the purah pad and her towers just drive me more isnane bc they are the same shit but called different and also much worse, liek the purah pad isnt some more developed shiekah stone, no its a glorified camera with a teleport function and thats it

(i know i said this before but i really cant stand how obsessed every single NPC is with sonau shit, you get told to your face every second line of dialog that they are so cool and are so mysterious that it just makes me annoyed of them even more, the game is obsessed with shoving them everywhere and telling you over and over you too should obsess over them, they werent weird like that about the shiekah stuff in botw?? the biggesst talking point in botw was calamity ganon ..... which makes sense and in totk its like ... gan is mentioned what, in a newspaper article??? once???and then not even by name i think???)

aside from that big point which will never let me go, its also just .. its not moving forward anything, it actively walks BACK the progress that was made in botw, call me dumb but i dont really count moving one step up in the social roles of each race as a character development (for the side characters like the champions desc- ahem SAGES) but mainly zelda ... god how dirty she was done, totk pretty explicitely makes her regress any development she made in botw aside from she likes link uwu and some people like her too, but also not enough to notice that that weird zelda being all evil and weird isnt her (INLCUDING THE CHAMP- SAGES WHO YOU ARE SUPPOSEDLY FRIENDS WITH??? you dont have to be a genius to pick up on that my god, were you all given the mc dumbo potion or what)

she gets put back to square one, back into the little itty bitty princessy maiden role forced upon her by her royal parentage, this time rauru edition, back into a white little dress, back into the scared puppy eyed teenager, back into a situation she cant handle, back into losing everyone around her (tho honestly botw made me care more about rhoam than totk did about rauru), back into being forced to do a big sacrifice- but worse actually

in botw she went to FIGHT AND HOLD GANON IN THE CASTLE SO LINK HAD TIME TO RECOVER AND IT WOULDNT DESTROY THE LAND!! and you are telling me in totk rauru takes up her botw role and she bascially killed herself to ... restore the mastersword.

......... she ... she did that only to be a glorified version of the stone pedestal in the forest. and then she gets returned to normal itty bitty girly no problem via magic sparkle beam at the end and

DOESNT

EVEN

REMEMBER.

it really is just botw but worse, you even get yet another ghost king of hyrule to guide you around (rhoam did it better fight me ... we dont talk about the questionable choice to make himself darker skinned when posing as just some guy)

i honestly dont think i was ever truly taken aback by anythign that happened in botw, while in totk, the further i played, the more i had to fight with myself to keep the feeling of unease, disappointment and betrayal down

its such a god damn shame, totk should have stayed a DLC, i will forever mournfully dream of a game that explores more of the ancient shiekah, doesnt erase integral parts of the world, developes characters more instead of making them regress back and make them end up even less developed than at the start of the game, dives into buried secrets and mistakes of dark pages of history without giving into a weirldy nationalist(imperalisitc?) narrative and lets characters have some agency for once

if it werent for the yiga i might have actually considered refunding the game, just to be at peace with myself

anyway, aboslutely incoherent word vomit.

[mejomonster]

Guardian really set my expectations of "censored bl cdramas" and man that was a high bar and probably not fair of me to expect.

Guardian really opens with Zhao Yunlan asking Shen Wei "are you married? You're such a catch. Can I take you out to eat? Here's my number A-Lan call me" which like even on face value id say thats called flirting (unless I guess ur so straight Straight blinders on that 2 men have to physically fuck in front of u to consider something gay)

Then of course there's shen weis pining shit but like, that's not Hammer down obvious to I guess the most oblivious person in denial

But Zhu Hong saying she likes Zhao Yunlan, Zhao Yunlan repeatedly refusing her and feeling bad about it, Zhu Hong repeatedly acknowledging he picked SHEN WEI over her (making it fairly clear it was a romantic pick and she Lost it to a guy) and shen Wei, brick that he can be at times, tells her it will only take a few years for the feelings to fade when she'll get over Zhao yunlan. The guy in love with him, instead of her. Yeah shen wei, she's definitely not wishing she could stab you for that insensitive remark. But she's too good of a person to.

Which. I'd say the above two points establish fairly overtly that: Zhao Yunlan is into men, that his colleagues assume he's also into women (if Zhu Hong thinks she has a chance), and that Shen Wei is Zhao Yunlans romantic pick. So Shen Weis sexuality? Well he doesn't dispute being Zhao Yunlans romantic pick, and Lin Jing assumes they're lovers with dialogue (yes he's saying opposite day stuff but his opposite day is just not being a liar and spy). So Shen Weis sexuality includes Zhao Yunlan.

And so like that's just. Fairly overt explicit stuff about their relationship. There's also the "a very oblivious person could argue its only implied" flirting. (And everything going on with Lao Chu and Xiao Guo, the side couple... oh my heart ;-; when they almost froze... the family dinner at Xiao guos... Lao chu admiring how kind Xiao Guo is, scaring him trying to say he's a cannibal and Xiao Guo not running away)

There's the coat sharing macho trying to be the man helping the damsel both of those fuckers do galore, shen wei moving in across the hall (which is either stalker or deeply in love or - as is true, both), shen wei implicitly moving in (this one's vague ill admit to be fair), the fucking "You're good with your hands" line from Zhao yunlan which is absolutely a porn line, every villain in the show viscerally aware Zhao Yunlan is who Shen Wei wants to protect, Ye Zun pretending to be Shen Wei by calling Zhao Yunlan cute names and asking if his outfit looks nice (and all of That), Zhao yunlans romantic ass hit me through the heart line of "if you're trouble I want a lifetime of you" at the wedding (not ever over it), the fucking lollipop scene in ye old haixing. Just a bunch of flirty type scenes, romantic tropes galore. And that's not even covering the actual genuine subtext of ALL the cases paralleling how shen wei and/or how Zhao yunlan feel implicitly (which are just subtext to be fair... how shen wei thinks he lost kunlun, how Zhao yunlan ISNT him so it hurts he's a stranger or he IS in which case he's a liar and shen weis grieving, the case where a dixingren and human love each other and Zhao yunlan notices he wants to be close to shen wei even though shen weis lying etc).

Like. They felt as canon as Tara X Willow in Buffy. Or at least as much as Xena x Gabrielle, the center relationship of the show where all stories of the episodes are always at least in some way about them.

[wrongchose]

I was going to make a post writing ALL the plot that inspired these sketches but it got too long for a little post IM CRYING KANDJ so instead have a little context for every single one (*・ω・)ﾉ

All in the same story Post-Apocalyptic scenario under cut!!

Some Julian design sketches, i changed little about his appearence as i think he would not need to, he knows how to hide very well from the rampaging monsters and hes kinda inmune to them anyways. Finds Randy unconscious and takes him as his talking companion (even if he doesn't talk) 'cause being alone in the apocalypse can't do you very good, can it?. He is actually admiting to know his secret for a while so he wakes up (he doesn't).

A concept i dreamed of; when the Ninja needs it, the suit will protect its user so basically it helps him when hes to tired to fight, (doesn't matter if hes not conscious). It is also capable to show the Ninja see content from the Nomicon without directly accesing to it. The appearence of the suit is directly linked to the state of the Ninja, it resembles bandages as a consecuence of the injuries and mental burden the he currently has. with them being the most simple form of the suit (only for healing, not fighting). Randy is not 100 conscious and cannot take the mask off until he completely heals. Gosh i love sketching edgy scenarios.

MORE peopleee, this time Theresa and Howard (i can't draw any of them ugghhh), Neither of them even have an idea of whats going on, so they team up to find their friends (Debbie and Randy specifically) and at the same time figure out a solution to this crisis, or at least thats what Theresa thinks, in reality Howard is trying desperately not to break a promise he made to Randy "help everyone in case the worst happens" (dude just wants to help). They get to know each other better and since Randy is missing Howard just likes to assume hes Ninja-ing, to not think of "the worst case scenario". Eventually they save Debbie later and find out what happened to Randy and his new "thing".

Edit: I UPLOADED THE UGLIEST PHOTOS EVER I EDITED THEM A BIT AJVDBA

Crutial points of this story but i dont know how to write for my dear life, i could make a mini comic but i dont want to know anything about thAT mmmm ლ(¯ロ¯"ლ)

[ralvezfanatic]

Although I think Luke is mostly a dom/top, I think he could be a switch.

Warnings: Just a bunch of nsfw headcannons about Luke. No actual story, plot, or smut, but there are mentions/descriptions of sex. HCs for male readers with a dick, and for trans male readers, (both with and without bottom growth).

Domming/topping? He'd manhandle you easily, no matter your size or anything. He's strong, he'll move you, flip you, or carry you to wherever he wants with complete ease.

He can be both rough or gentle with you, whichever you prefer at the moment. Unless he was away from you for long. He'd be rough, desperate to feel you again.

Luke gets desperate when he's spent more than a couple days without you, your kisses, your touch, your body. He'll jump your bones as soon as theres a chance.

He'll be pulling you into a kiss, all messy from his desperation. His hands moving all over your body, glad to be holding you again.

Leading you to your bedroom, or they nearest surface if he can't help himself. There isn't a place in either of your homes where you and him haven't fucked.

On the couch, on the kitchen countertops, in the shower, bathroom sink, against every wall in the house, hell even the floor.

He's clawing at your clothes, trying to rip them off you as quick as possible. He's gotten good at undressing you both in under two minutes.

He's rough at the start, so so desperate (and horny) after being away from you for so long. He can't keep his hands off you, wanting to feel you.

When you have sex, he'd prep you by eating you out. He'd happily bury himself between your thighs, licking and sucking around your entrance, pushing his fingers in to stretch you.

If you have a cunt, he'd happily lick up all your juices. Lapping them up hungrily, unable to get enough of your taste. Its intoxicating, hes addicted to tasting you. He'd praise your taste, your cunt and everything about you as he ate you out.

He'd kiss and lick your clit/dick. (No matter what you have, bottom growth or not, he'll call it a dick.) He'd suck on your bud while pumping his fingers in and out of you.

He could (and would) make you cum just from his mouth and fingers, and he's extremely proud of that.

If you have a dick, he'd still happily go down on you. He'd lick around your hole before starting to prep you.

When he's stretching you, he'd jerk you off slowly. He'd thrust his fingers in and out of you while his other hand pumps your cock.

He'd kiss your tip, give it small licks as he adds another finger into you. He would take your length in slowly, removing his fingers to hold you in place as he sucks you off.

He would either stop right before you cum, having fun with the way you'd cried out in frustration, or keep going until you cum into his mouth, moaning around you whole swallowing all of your seed.

He would keep your cock in his mouth licking every drop of cum off your length until you push him off.

After eating you out, he'd fuck you, even if you finished already. He loves overstimulating you, loving the noises that come out of you, the way you cry from pleasure but don't stop him.

He'd praise you, calling you a good boy for taking him so well, leaning down to wipe away your tears and kiss you so you'd calm down.

Subbing/bottoming? He's needy, way more than when he tops. He allows you to control him completely, obeying your every command. He loves making you happy, and if that means become a desperate needy slut, thats what he'll do.

He definitely prefers to bottom after a really stressful day/case. He loves being taken care of, not having to worry or work too much and just relax for a moment.

Luke definitely has a praise kink, and its more prominent when hes getting topped yk.

He becomes a complete mess under you. No matter if you're fucking him, riding him/his face, he's a mess. He is ADDICTED to your taste, absolutely loves whenever you sit on his face. Quite literally cannot get enough of you.

More on the praise kink. He could probably cum from just being praised while going down on you. Like being praised and tasting you? He couldn't imagine anything better.

He's wasn't used to bottoming before you, never having someone who wanted to top him. So the first time he bottomed for you, he was a bit nervous.

He also never experiment with himself back there, so in a way it felt like you were taking his virginity, to him at least. (Don't question his thinking).

He was sensitive, trying to hold back whimpers when you started to prep him, his own dick leaking precum just from your fingers going in.

Once you added your third finger into him, he was already begging for you to fuck him. He would have came from just your fingers if you didn't stop.

While topping, he's not that loud. He'd praise you a lot and just compliment everything about you. But while bottoming, he'd be a bit louder.

Honestly, he'd whimper.. like I can see this man whimpering as you fuck him stupid.

For aftercare, I think he's big on it. He'd make sure your comfortable, going to get a warm cloth to clean you up first.

He loves to cuddle after sex, preferring to hold and kiss you while thanking you and continuing to compliment you. 9 out of 10 times this results in round 2 or more.

He'd either draw you a bath, depending if you can walk or not. Or he would shower with you.

[actualbird]

WAIT I WAS SPAMMING MARIUS TO INTERACT WITH HIM IN VISIT FOR FUN AND HE SAID “my brother used to buy me clothes. he had a better sense of fashion than me” (or something v similar to this, I got the intimacy level up screen half way through) and I’m like AGH the angst, he even took marius on shopping trips 😭 😭 😭 maybe marius buys clothes based on what giann would pick 😭

WAHHHH yes thats one of my favorite lines from his regular interactions!!! i love how it gives a glimpse of marius and giann's relationship, even if it's a very mundane detail. theres two things i wanna say about this though

1 ) while the line seems to be nostalgic in a way, i also like the implication/thematic tie in that marius growing out of his brother's shadow (even if the circumstances that Led to this happening are less than ideal)

like, theres several stories that show that other people saw marius as lesser or as somebody simply in his brother's shadow and not a person himself. but among marius' key story themes methinks is individuality and carving out his own identity for himself and expressing that identity while bound to a world that is so strict about how he "must" present himself

(sidenote: this is an incredibly queercoded theme to me and i mean that genuinely! the radical decision to be himself against all the "norms" of what the society surrounding him wants him to be!)

(sidenote 2: marius actually shares this theme with vyn a LOT. royal expectations and high class expectations. except that vyn made the radical decision to leave, which is in itself still a valid and worthwhile expression of his individuality. also vyn chose a new name for himself that is so lgbt of him)

so yeah, while giann was the one taking care of marius' clothes (and thus, in a way, marius' image) (though this doesnt strike me as a bad thing, more just in an overbearing protective caring older brother sense) (i hc giann has a lot of guilt in failing marius during their childhoods so he overcompensated in a lot of ways and maybe one of the ways was HEY MARIUS LET'S GO SHOPPING)—SORRY IM GETTING OFF TOPIC. anyway while giann was the one buying clothes in the beginning, that obviously is no longer the case now. so much like the other spheres of marius' life, he needs to employ his individuality in this smaller mundane way as well.

so while i think marius does, every once in a while, buy some clothes because it was what giann would pick, i think he does this out of nostalgia and out of how much he misses giann. not because the image giann had helped him make is one he necessarily fully and only ascribes to. i think marius by and large chooses his own clothes based on his own tastes and identity that he has now made for himself

and i think hes done a pretty good job! marius' outfits are AWESOME. quick shoutouts to my favorite outfits of his:

(sidenote 3: i know that last one, the pink denim jacket one, had POLARIZED audiences but sue me i personally love it jHVKJHSDF i think it is so fun and so campy and pink suits him well)

ANYHOO the second thing i wanna bring up is

2 ) IM SO CURIOUS AS TO WHAT GIANN'S FASHION SENSE IS

i know many many of us have seen giann's sprite already from the cn server bday 3 card of marius, but that sprite showed him in a very formal outfit. i wanna know what his casual day to day fashion sense is like. is it soft cardigans core? something more streetwear? dark academia? JVSKFJHDVFS

i personally think his fashion sense would be in a perpetual state of smart casual. i have no basis for this, this is just me going off of vibes.

thanks for the ask!!

[i-bring-crack]

<Spoilers for Solo Leveling Ragnarok>

And another reason why I love Solo Leveling Ragnarok is because it slaps you (sneaky but it's there) with the knowledge that yeah, [TLDR] Jinwoo made the most dumb decisions of his life due to him trying to put every single problem in the universe on his shoulders.

Jinwoo as a person

Is someone who has been put through so much since he was young, we get it, we see it, since he is just 14 he was the only man in the house, so a lot of social roles were placed on him. And even though his mom had raised him with care and did all she could to save the family, 2 pressures were already placed upon him when his dad left. 1, that as a man he should help out everywhere and at every time, he was an older sibling as well so he had to protect Jinah this time as a brother and a father, and 2, his mom was a normal housewife, she started to work yes but the family hadn't expected this big of a turn in their life which probably made him even more pressure to succeed, to earn money or something so that he could take care of them as well. (And I can somewhat relate to this based through experience, as well as other familiar experiences I've noticed sometimes. How people slowly start to look for a way to earn money rather than trying to pursue their passions. All they keep thinking about is a way to be financially stable and it leaves a hyperfixation with being rich, working until exhaustion, and sometimes not doing well at school because it's a waste of things they are never going to use. It could also go differently in the case of Jinah where she studied as much as she could to become a doctor. But to Jinwoo, he never got to become or find a passion of his that he liked, even when he had both parents, he never had a reason to pursue anything and simply was swayed into becoming a detective by Jinchul.) So overall, Jinwoo had slowly begun to think less of himself as a person and more as another tool inside the house that should push their weight around to help.

And then he loses his mother to a comma. Not only is he now having to take care of his sister, but also his mother because she doesn't die, she becomes another wight he has to try and keep alive, and her being, well his MOTHER, he would do almost everything to save her. Now, all of his help is entirely cut off. The parents he was supposed to trust on and lean on are gone. And he is now the only lifeline for Jinah, who isn't even an adult so he can't lean on her or make her work, it would be against all he is trying to work for, which is giving Jinah a better life, giving his family a better life.

And this self solitude goes on for 4 more years. No, in fact, it keeps dragging him into more solitude during the four years of working, pushing his weight around, and literally trying not to die make his psyche more stressed on relying everything by himself or else he is a failure of a person.

To the point where HE is the one that sees himself more as a failure than the rest. The people around him are often bothered by his weakness, yes, and he does get the nickname, but that isn't what's going to affect him more in the long run, rather its the fact that he sees himself not worth saving more than the others. Like how he thinks Juhee might be mad at him for always being so weak and constantly getting injured. To the point where even some of the readers agree and think Juhee would never like someone like him in the first place. But thats completely the opposite actually. Juhee cared for him! Invited him on a date! Tries to STAY BEHIND, I REPEAT STAY BEHIND FOR JINWOO. And Mr Song wants him to live, wanted him to get out of the temple, another person in the LN warns him of the lizards. ONE side story literally is about a worker (who I had mistaken for jinchul my bad it's never said actually who he is) who tries his best to get him to safety. There were, are people who cared about him, about his being.

And Jinwoo doesn't see that, most fucked up part is that people need to read more indepth to see that most of the self hatred comes FROM HIM and the people he fixated upon that he thinks think hate him. His weakness is a big part of his problem, but his self worth exceeds more of the problems later on.

So he doesn't see himself as someone that needs to live on. He doesn't see himself as person in his own house but rather a breadwinner or the only thing keeping the household together. He doesn't think he can be anything better because he doesn't have a college degree or is even smart. The best thing he excells at is hunting, and yet he is the weakest.

His only choice is to become stronger.

And now that's fine in his own right. It's what he wanted it anyways (wrong mistake kiddo, he never had ambitions in the first place except survival), so what if he has been mentally exhausted over the past 4 years, basically going through a war but instead of people it's monsters that are very very bloodthirsty (and totally not someone who could reason with them, talk and have their own lives outside of this world but has been forcefully put into this dungeon with the constant command in their heads to kill and destroy everything. No, sir, those stones right there are not brainwashing crystals! They are just profit you can gain by killing them!)

And so what if he gets to live through one of his worst near death experiences that also increased his trust issues through the story?

He gets to be strong! Everything is forgiven, right? (Right, Ashborn????) All the pain and psychological damage he gets to suffer before that or afterward (liking learning to kill people) is immediately rewarded with more points! More strength! More power!

Oh, you don't even have to worry about all those monsters resenting you or hating your guts because you will arise them, and they shall become your most devoted slaves forever! Yes, the only people Jinwoo gets to live with for his immortal life, the only people in which Jinwoo can rely for help are the souls of his enemies and no one else. The souls who tried to kill him, who tied to kill everything he loves as well.

What's the point in this now, though? It's not like the author wanted to give Jinwoo some depth over his characters mental state. Instead, it was the opposite because he managed to deal very well while under that constant pressure. And besides, he likes hunting. He likes it now! (no, he feels satisfaction over holding power in those situations, he was disgusted at having to kill someone, he was angry at himself when he fought rasaka, he hated the ice Monarch for killing gunhee and escaping from his grass so easily than him being a threat. He doesn't like hunting. He just hates being hunted.) There's no need to dwelve on the story because he gets to have a good happy family (who he can never reveal his true self to) and some friends (that he tried to reach out to search because he knew they would never meet in any other circumstance) and a good boss (who knows the true extent of his power and leaves him to be however he please because he has saved the world and also because there would be no way he can stop him from doing whatever he wishes, even if he creates eternal torment for others.) And he has a wife as well!! (Who the story is completely vague about whenever or not Haein truly remembers everything or doesn't at all and just knows that he is pretty fuking powerful. And both of these already are basically a tight rope for her to walk on. It's not like im thinking haein could do something to upset jinwoo, but there's no way she isn't at least somewhat scared by the prospect of what might happen if he gets mad with her. He can do anything. He can even hide your existence, wipe out the memories, and create new ones, there is no one out there that could come close to ever challenging him, nothing out there that could save you if he changed his thoughts in any way.)

And he also has a son!

A son who means everything to him. But someone who can challenge those views of putting every weight on his shoulders as well.

Solo Leveling's Ending

It was great for others, not for some. Personally, I love it as a Shonen and powerfantasy fan, but not as a literary fan.

First of all, there was no reason for the cup of reincarnation to exist, yes, even though some of the past timelines had been alluded ever since the demon castle and its ruins looking the same as SK. The 'one last chance to wrap it up' is complete deuz ex-machina and just absolutely cleans away all the reason for everything in its story. There's no more advanced technology or clean energy resources (new add-on from the anime) There's no people who could get away from poverty and earn new jobs from this industry that requires all kinds of people. (Yes, even non awakened! Like they could study, the monsters gather knowledge to help create more technology or work in a guild. There wasn't much stopping them if the monsters could literally step away from the dungeon, and also, most of the side characters we know of from the US also use their skills more than having a rank.)

"There's no deaths from monsters as well! Thats good right?"

And yeah, it is! But you know, what could have also been well is if Jinwoo could have still let mana come into this world. Magic didn't have a bad outcome for his world. In fact, magic was the entire reason Jinwoo could get to become so omnipotent as he was. But instead of bringing it back to everyone, maybe even finding a way for people to become strong in their own way like make systems of leveling up for others, he instead decides to keep it all hidden. Not for himself, but absolutely hidden.

"But if he didn't, then people would fall into a comma and die, and there's no cure around the Sleeping death!" There is, and it includes a monarch's blood, which if we ignore the sequel. There's no way he can find a demon and create a monarch to drain him every time for mass production. However, he is also, you know, a freaking God. He can shape reality, shift time, he can raise the dead, he can open gates to mine mana crystals so they could sustain the lives of the comma patients, and even then he has the Rulers at his side who could possibly help him find a cure. Of all things if he isn't able to find a cure for Eternal Sleep after all of the power he has in his hands (and not to mention that dream Antares in the extra thought it was just a little disease he could so easily cure) then this would... idk, man, but he still has a stock so he could cure his mother again and give two others for the scientists to study it at least. He has everyone at his disposal. He can find a cure.

Secondly, the story singlehandedly erased every reason for us to love anything about the story apart from jinwoo.

Your favorite characters? Oh, they are alive, alright, but they aren't as you've met them before. Oh, Haein? Is she the badass swordsman who had experienced death and had her own fallout in life that shaped her as a person while also overcoming her own traumas against Beru? Yeah, she is just an athlete now and then a stay at home wife! Swords? What are those? Loosing? Nah. Thinking about the possibility of what kind of being has been attached to you emotionally and psychologically because he thinks that becoming human should also abide by the gender stereotypical tropes and should therefore find a wife first instead of looking for a therapist out there or deal with his psychological problems first before thinking about trying to date a 13 year old (wait no, it's um, trying to make her to date you, leave big hints, and then tell her that for 10 years you has been trying to chase her bc you were the only person he deemed worthy enough to marry. Why? Who knows(strong and beautiful)! The date must have been such a well off success that it seems he has carried those emotions over it and practically decided to latch onto you, being also the only person he WILLINGLY shared all the knowledge to. Yeah, no pressure, baby.)

Oh, Gunhee? His death? Now its more of a pointless sacrifice than a desth for delevopment. Jinwoo still had the reason to kill the monarchs bc they were at some point going to kill the world. Sure, it wasn't as personal, but, you know. Now Gunhee gets to live again, and then we see him die again. Slow clap, everyone, thank you. His death literally meant nothing now. Jinchul crumbled and tried to put himself in his place, but now that doesnt matter since we dont even HAVE a reunion of Jinchul and Gunhee in the next timeline so their entire relationship is gone. Poof. Jinwoo mourning? No, Gunhee just comes back again and gets to live off as a wealthy philanthropist!

Sung Il Hwans sacrifice that impacted whenever or not jinwoo lived through the monarchs attacks? Oh its okay he is alive now! You know it's not like I had wept literal tears for both of these characters only for them to come back in like 3 arcs later. I guess our emotions meant nothing now! Could have just... Not killed them and then gone back in time. Nothing would have changed, Jinwoo would have still wanted everything to be rewinded.

Jinwoo saying, "Too many people died," felt a bit obtuse in my head, though. Too many suffered yes, but like only two, 3 if we count Adam White, that we cared about where dead. And that's about it if I remember correctly. Like the story could have left of a bittersweet note at worst and on a wholesome ending for the future at best.

It wouldn't have been bad even when many died. And yes many did die that we never cared about, but they also died to protect everything they died.

Say, if Jinwoo died, would a random fodder character say his death shouldn't have happened and decided to rewind it all back to beginning instead, would that have left a good impression, to suddenly erase everything he stood for, his powers his title his struggles, all gone because, oh he died from circumstances that could have been prevented? Many things are preventable, disease, war, conquer. But if you just rewind time then it shouldn't matter that they died now. Those who protected their families out of their own will, went through tooth and nails to fight and live on? Yeah only Jinwoo can do that, only Jinwoo should make that descision. So anyways who cared whenever or not the hunters decided to put their lives on the line (and also it's not like during the 10 years until the final war people weren't allowed to retire or just not work as hunters even though they were awakened COUGH Joohee, Soohyung COUGH)

(Or it's not like Guilds, Essence stones and Awakenings could have absolutely benefited other countries in the world to relapse from the economic and social problems while also creating clean energy resources for the enviroment— And not to mention that this entire system isnt based on nepotism at all for those in power but rather sheer luck of who does and doesnt awaken.)

Lastly I would have tied the point back again to the free will of the people, but it's pretty clear from the last chapter what I mean, yet also I need to instilled the point that he never asked. He never thought about what others might think. When the United States got him on camera, he didn't care and never told them the truth. He doesn't think whenever or not his victims would like to get revived or take revenge of constant hell upon their killers. Neither does he care about criminal acrivity outside of Seoul, apparently bc there is no news of criminal activities being taken down globally (yeah, you have the power of a god, but we are so grateful for you never using it except when it disturbs your ambience! It's not like people are being actively enslaved and under constant dictatorship out there. North Korea? Oh, there's no need for you to help them out.)

And what's worse is that his own powers attract even more enemies to a world that has no way to defend himself, and no way to instantly learn about mana!

:D

Great wonderful thing Jinwoo, this is the same as turning back world wars to them never happening even though they had shaped the entire world that we've come to known. But at the same time also keeping the powers on a ticking bomb as to when they will start the wars again.

But hey, he is pretty omnipotent! So what if there are extraterrestrial enemies in his curf and destroying earth every time they decide to come (oh man, it sure does wonders to see more natural habitats be destroyed for no reason and with no way to explain it! I mean where else would he fight them? The cities? People would get to know about magic then and he can't have that happening!) He can best them all with his shadows and then leave as if nothing happened.

There's totally not a single consequence that could come from all of this!

Consequences

To make this faster imma make a list:

The most frequent ones seen in Solo Leveling Ragnarok.

Gates appear and the whole world is in shambles as to what to do! Thus leaving to many people outright confused and many deaths as well (more, had it not been for Jin-Chul's work)

Suho could have died! Because why tell your son in highschool —since you didn't want him to eb alone in middle school, and in his teenage years he still doesn't know the source of any of his powers or his true nature. Up until what age was he going to be kept in the dark jinwoo? WHAT could have happened if Beru hadn't come to save him? Does he also have that death resurrection thing??? I don't know! No one knows!

Oh yeah no monarchs means that everyone who managed to survive the war is now fighting each other because there is no actual order or some higher power for them to listen to. It's become an anarchy on its own and a bunch of them have decided to break into tribes or states to live! Great! If we read out history book for two seconds you know how badly those things go!!!

Cha Haein was basically forced to survive through sheer will and raise a small village on her own. (Oh and how surprising it seems that the elves were reasonable enough to even tall to her and not outright kill her. My goodness. Could it be they also have a consciousness?)

Esil was forced to see her family be killed, after Jinwoo wiped the rest of the nobles, because the gates had dragged her back to her world since she was the only one who possessed demon blood.

The entire race of the dragons went almost extinct. (And that ones between good and horribly bad because they ALMOST went extinct)

Places like North Korea and Ireland have irreversible damage due to the open field gates which have left many to die. Others include Russia and China but they aren't as fucked however the landscapes of their country have changed a lot due to the mass of open field gates.

The ones that came with the side effects:

In the end, possibly another chunk of the population has died yet again (but do we care? No not really, it's not like Jinwoo had the possibility to save this by giving some backup information— or did he just left it all in charge to haein in the case this happened? It wasn't made clear with that bc she was supposed to tell suho about it in case their father disappeared but like... wow she really got a lot of weight on her hands at least give her some of your shadow army so that she can take care of any alien invasions— no? Just kaisel?...ok (honestly he is pretty great I have no qualms with Kaisel. Best shadow in the whole series) but like, you expect her to protect everyone with that? And no, the necklace isn't viable here, there was no other shadow to help her explain the necklaces' feature for her. JINWOO YOU HAVE AN ARMY— AHHHHHHH

Memory confusions between the past timelines and the others. You know because the Rulers had inhabited certain bodies and like I'll Hwang their memories might have hmmm, idk, come back.

Leaving only a few people with the memories of the past did not in fact help him at all, Sung I'll Hwang thankfully got his memories back soon or else he would have also been lost to the power. Thankfully Zhigang and Thomas met Suho or else it would have been another Christopher Reed situation of spirited away.

Too many people began to focus their faith on the foreign religion because they wanted answers to the many problems that where occurring and wanted to also protect their home (cough siddhart sough)

The other possible ones that are not implied but could appear:

Mana condensation. The changing of wildlife and nature as a whole (which is never talked about?! I get it, not relevant to the story. But damn if it didn't do incomprehensible damage.) (Although this one is a vague good or bad thing but a side effect nonetheless)

Again, setting back the age of progression (not only due to the things that could have been invented from mana but also because the gates everywhere would make for a hard situation in which to invent anything at all.)

Leaving open windows of opportunity for the universe to be threatened. In this case, he left many of the races he was supposed to exterminate, alive, bc killing the monarch would already be enough for him. This instead led to a worse possible idea bc 1, had he completely wiped out the other races he could have easily taken away any possible enemies from his sight. "Oh but he wouldn't kill monsters who are weak and defenseless" well too bad Odysseus now you are stuck with demons who are scared of you and resent you for the rest of their lives and will trade with anyone for more power to stab you where it hurts the most. Also, jinwoo had time to finish off everything. Two years was equal to 27 years, he could have dipped in and out and killed the remnants that he might have not noticed were still alive.

This one, though, I also blame it on the Rulers. Bc they would have been the first ones to know or had gathered knowledge that, yes, actually, the monarchs can come back since the fragments of darkness linger around and try to find other hosts for them to live through, it's why the monarchs haven't been able to truly pass on and why the monsters are so keen in finding sacred relics or building temples– because a monarch can come back, and in fact HAS to come back in order to maintain some order in their dimensions. And like, they would have known that, right? They have fought for centuries upon centuries. It feels like a shitty plan for them to not have at least CHECKED if another monarch could have spawned somewhere else, especially when Jinwoo was doing most of the dirty work out there by fighting the giants in his own home.

I think I probably repeated some of these, and it sounds like I'm throwing shade at Jinwoo for being a dumbass (only I can do that. No one else deserves to shame him.) but his actions are more than justified in terms of how Jinwoo is personality wise. It's also more bitter than maddening to see how all of these could have been prevented had Jinwoo decided not to play his part of lonesome hero and instead talked. About everything. From the war to the mana to the crystals. He didn't need to instantly go on a podium and say all the things. But at least, when he had his son or when he came back from he war, he could have talked with his parents about this newfound power. Slowly, he could have shown it to more and more people, especially those he knew about that had honest and good intentions (Adam White, Norma Selner, Thomas, Zhigang, Jongin) he wouldn't have needed to put himself out there as much and he would have relied on others believing him until there would have finally been enough people to understand about mana before finally letting it in. And maybe the Rulers could have come, some other species as well to help humanity interact with them for a while, let Rulers take care of this earth for some time while he goes to other worlds for a moment so that he can slay enemies to other places instead and come back again to see the progress. If they ever wanted to then maybe jinwoo could have given some of the hunters their memories back, and knowing how they took it in this timeline, Jinwoo would have been sure that they wouldn't have been sacred of him nor hated him for the things he had done. He would have had more people to understand what he went through alone, he would have had more friends, the freaking romance would have made a bit more sense in the end with all the memories gathered instead of one-sided (and wouldn't have much of a power imbalance). And he doesn't even need them to be strong enough to hurdle monarchs or giant monsters on their own. He just needs for them to be there for him. That's it. That's it.

Daul and his friendship theme [in Dungeon Reset] and in Raganrok.

Idk whenever or not Chugang had seen the flaws of his own character as much as everyone else, or if he had listened to his criticisms about the one dimensional personality of his own characters, or he just thought Daul was a good writer, could be any of these could be not but one thing for sure is that, he chose right.

Mainly because I haven't seen Infinite Reset, I won't be able to comment much on whenever or not his theme always revolves around building a safe foundation with friendships. But from what I've gathered in Dungeon Reset, a lot of his characters aren't insanely strong or if they are have cheat codes, they aren't completely overpowered in the way that they can best every single thing without anyone's help. There's still others who are stronger or others who can help the MC gather not only the strength needed to fight against the villains but also to help uncover more of the lore as it goes on.

And it works so well in Ragnarok because: We have this prodigy of a child who can not only level up but has been gifted by his father with a whole Shadow Dungeon as well as inherited some of the powers, and yet he isn't a strong man from the start.

Suho is someone who needs help constantly. From the beginning of the series, he never won a fight alone in its entirety. He won it thanks to an external help and his own internal progression. He levels up, but he isn't completely broken (though he is stronger than his father in some levels because he chooses to add more of his points in strength rather than intelligence. He is like a "what if Jinwoo had invested more points in strength all the way instead of suddenly shifting his focus to intelligence.") From the top of my head I remember his fights where he had to rely on either the monarchs help, the help of the successors, or the help of other S ranks and A ranks (Miho in the Villain Arc, Ryo in the Pyramid and India arc), and even his dad's deus ex machina help to get through his fights.

But he doesn't see it as something bad, and the story doesn't pain it as bad. Suho wants to get strong, yes, but he doesn't distance himself when he needs help, and he doesn't become someone that leaves everyone behind after like two arcs. Granted some of the characters are only making appearances here and there, but they get fleshed out more as they appear.

Taking the case for Miho, who is almost the least explored, we do still see her in the arcs how her character evolves from someone who values her strength as is very observant, to someone who is upright and bossy, and slowly from then on we get to find out that she is someone like that because she has the same justice morals as her dad, and she is also the one who leads most of the paperwork while her dad is out there fighting for most of the battles. And she is just the least characterized. Then there is Zhigang, who suffered through the possession of the Itarims and thus becomes someone more bloodthirsty but wants to fight against that in order to protect others. We see Thomas confronted by his ineptitude and his emptiness of his power. We see Lim Dogyun and Taegyu having to reconcile with their past that separated them from the first place. We see Siddhart be swayed by his hero complex due to everything around him. They are characters in their own right (and they could be more explored. Yes. This also isn't the end, so I can't say whenever or not they will or to what extent)

The protagonist from Dungeon Reset also shows that train of though, often getting help from others, giving something in return. His actions make him a leader, whereas Suho's actions make him someone to be loved more, rather than lead.

And I mean loved more because he isn't usually in a leading leading position. He orders his shadows around and does rake on the lead in things a lot of the time, but in the case where he can't deal with something, he would let another take on the lead (I.e Haein in the Ice Elves Kingdom arc. Taegyu in the Villain arc. ) or he would have a small rag group of teammates (which, apart from the shadows, always changes depending on the arc) rather than a group that follows him here and there.

Not to mention the fact that the shadows speak more now, and there isn't as many as before with Jinwoo, so all of them get to extent their personalities as well, leading Suho to not be completely lonely for most of the time. Even the system in some way isn't just a blank screen, but rather Suho has Beru and Ammut, who act as a guide and a trainer, respectively.

Inadvertently, that leads to Suho's character of protection even more than before. He gets to admire his dad and his mom for what they have done and for how much more powerful they are than him. But it doesn't make him any less blind to the fact that, yeah, taking all the power for himself and having all the responsibilities as well, was a bad idea in the long run.

Father and Son

In regards to the cup, I think everyone would have made that decision. Turn back time and let people live happily ever after. That's all good. What sets the problem is the things that come after that.

And while the story mentions it, Suho also put in a new light of his own, that he wants his father to be recognized for his actions instead of taking it all alone for himself.

Now, does Jinwoo ever ask for a reward after saving the world? No. Does he need it? Absolutely. And that knowledge did always bug me as to why he would just try to keep himself from being known, try to gatekeep magic and monsters from the world. Why did he want it all to disappear and for himself to never be entirely understood. Because, again, just by going from Solo Leveling and its side stories, we never get to truly know if haein ever recovered all of her memories or if she was just told by Jinwoo what had happened before.

Then, the title slaps me in the face. Yeah, it's solo leveling. It's everything coinciding with lonelyness, Beru in Raganrok as well (and by extension, the other author) had emphasized at some point that he levels up alone, he lives alone, he slowly keeps driven to hide away everything that he is and everything that he has truly become— In the same way he hides away all the pain from being noticed by his sister, in the same way rhat he wanted to hide his profession of hunting from his mother, in the same way that he wanted to hide his awakening from everyone else, in the same way that he wanted to hide his trauma through more and more reckless fighting, in the same way he wanted to hide his potential lost of feelings as he is Leveling up, in the same way he NEVER brought up the fact that his father died right in front of him,— He closes himself because he thinks that if the people were to know of him, hate him? Worry for him? Fear him? Whatever he is expecting of others it scares him.

"But he actually just wants to live a normal life!" If he did, he would have given up his power to someone else, or he would have stopped himself from using his powers altogether. But he doesn't. He heals Haeins foot, he gives some mama to his friend so he can run faster, and he uses his shadows as well as other powers to do some criminal activities. He doesn't want a normal life. He just wants some escape. He is hypocritical with his own statement by already doing things that are out of the norm. "Oh, but she needed it, or they deserved it." Yeah, and he could also do that as well to others, heal sickness, hunt down other criminals out there in the world that pose a bigger threat to the living than anything, but he doesn't. Not to mention that the more mana he spreads, the more the enemies are going to notice him. And if he doesn't want to deal with that then he should have healed Haein with magic (maybe use something else that could have been nice) or hunt down criminals at all!

In the end, he had already come so dark to achieve all of his powers, and he can't just leave all of his responsibilities behind as much as he wants ro, so he has to come and accept it that he will never go back to the way it is.

And maybe he has already started to notice that? Or maybe he will get to notice that when he and Suho reunite again? Everything he knows bout earth is just recent, and he doesn't seem to be mad that Suho has decided to become a monarch of a different race instead of being the Shadow Monarch. And while I can't say much about Jinwoo's feelings right now or the state of his mind rhat he might be in right now, there are is a few hints out there that he could still feel as though it is always his duty to put every responsibility on him.

We see this in the reunion with Suho as an illusion. Suho sees his greatest fear, which is letting his own father down, unable to reach his maximum (or unable to reach the power he needs for Suho to help his father carry some of his burden). And he is worried as well that he IS Jinwoo's biggest weakness. To that, Jinwoo responded that it didn't matter and to use his full extent of his shadow powers either way. Once again, leaving Jinwoo to put on more responsibility on himself for the sake of others.

However, for the first time, and due mostly to the circumstances rather than himself, he has to expose that weakness even without being present. He has to learn to trust his own son, which he loves enough to do so, and finally, fucking finally get someone to help him out on earth. This man had it not been for son, who again, he does trust –because he knows him more than anyone else, it's his only child, it has the same powers as him, it's basically the only one who can relate to him: as a human and monarch. Suho also learns about his loneliness the more he hears of Jinwoo's story from Beru. He takes the risk of giving information about Jinwoo for the sake of not letting be alone anymore. That's his gift to his father, to let him acknowledge that no matter what, he won't stand alone anymore. Not as long as Suho is here and leveling up for him.

Ps: Incredibly funny of Suho to also be such a contrast to his dad that even Antares likes him. And it's not the 'Oh, he is just so nice that everyone can't stand his niceness cinnamon roll' Not it's the opposite. He will aggressively befriend you for your powers/skills/because yes. No questions asked.

Pss: Jinwoo will do anything for Suho, even change his lonely attitude of him it's making me sob. WHY DID IT TAKE YOU A SON FOR YOU TO FINALLY RELY ON SOMEONE THAT WASN'T DEAD 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭. What's worse is the fact that it isn't an entire change of the original Jinwoo since in the last extras, he did want Suho to fight alongside him. Despite his C type parenting, he was doing all he could to love Suho as well.

But, you know, I wish we kinda got to see more of that father and son bond Daul *shaking Kakapage* Give us some flashbacks of them Daul! It's not that hard Daul!!!!! WHERES THEIR FISHING TRIP—

[bonniethebun]

May as well tiene into a twst account, idk cause it's fuuuun ny way

TWST BOYS IN A ROADTRIP 😦

What if they courses went in a Lil trip by themself HUH?

First yeaars

Jack: main driver, did it for most of the road until he noticed the others had the intention of letting him be a choffer, the plan didnt last cuz he aint that dumb

Epel: Main co Pilot, he was a GOOD sense of orientation, secondary driver but he's a menance, his way of driving is the embodiment of the phrase

" i may risk our life but Not our puntiality"

Deuce: third designated driver, barely takes the wheel, if he's actually driving people he gets kinda nervous, a chill passanger that makes no trouble

Ace: he's a cunning passanger, if theres only ,3 or 2 people he Will lay in the back seat as of it was a bed, but thats not the case, he"ll take co Pilot insted of the cramping any day, he plays the music

Sebek: another headache of a passanger, he has Two modes complaining or silently juding, at least he will willfully go to the back and You can entrust he Will share the snack for the road EVENLY

Second years

Jade: one of the Main drivers, somehow they get a little faster when he drives them anywhere

Azul: on copilot 80% cuz he's the one picking the Best hotel and tours deals

Floyd: right behind or in copilot seat for very short times just to keep and eye on him cuz i know this mf is the type of person to just JUMP of the moving car

Riddle: gave himself the job of looking thru virtual maps how the hell does jade get quicker, or just reading in his phone, or pretending to be asleep so he can ignore floyd

Ruggie: enjoying the free day, doesnt care what seat, Will drive for a bit only of neccesary but he would the the wheel for a bit for an extra snack

Kalim: been his usual self making small talk with whoever is next to him, is on the aux cord but just asks the others what song would they like next

Jamil: near kalim but Not exactly next so he can small talk and still attend him, he Will switch with jade for driving to takeba break

Silver: with a collar pillow and earphones cuz he can at least be in a comfy position for sleeping

Third years

Leona:If it's his car he WILL be driving, Will put others to drive for shorts periods of he feels lazy enough, if it's not his car he's taking the co Pilot seat hostage

Trey: secondary driver, Will do the hand gesture of sticking the hand behind the seat to ask for a snack

Vil: princess passanger treatment, will blast his music the majority of time and every one would have to suck it up, goes straight to the back if it's too sunny cuz it bothers him

Rook: helps with directions and snack sharing, is the type to have a little bag with EVERYTHING, vil's special snacks, any pills for dizzyness, etc

Cater: makes various Magicam histories of only the road cuz yeah theres royalty but either WAY he kinda can de tox a little and Make small talk

Lilia: constant back seat, specifically behind the driver, him and Cate are of the few ones that can over throw vil's aux cord tyrany, either that or to let this granpa tell WEIRD stories

Malleus: really quiet , makes some comment about what catches his eyes along side the road, brough a book and EVERYone is baffled how he doesnt get dizzy

Idia: confinned in the portable Game he brough, volumen to the max and sit next to malleus cuz he's silently reading

I don't know if to put ortho to the first or third years, but i think in wherver car he his Will just chat and announce how close they are to the destination as if they were on a plane

~~~~~~~~~~~

Bye 🫥

[lastoneout]

Neurology appointment was once again a mixed bag. Long story short I actually have occipital neuralgia, not regular migraines, but she didn't actually give me any treatment options and just told me to lose more weight. Full rant under the cut.

But yeah she looked at my CT scan and said she doesn't see any signs that my intracranial hypertension is being caused by my cervical spine alignment compressing anything, which is kinda a bummer bcs thats what I hoped was going on, but alas I guess I will have to continue to pray something gives and we can figure out what's causing it bcs despite being on a very high dose of the medication used to treat the condition for like 4 years and losing 20lbs nothing has gotten better or worse.

Aside from that it does seem like I probably don't actually have generic migraines, I have occipital neuralgia. Which would explain why all of the different migraine medications I'm on have done fuck all to actually help and why my migraine-like symptoms don't 100% line up with typical migraines(no auras, very little sound sensitivity/moderate light sensitivity, they last for days if not weeks, are extremely resistaint to treatment, even when they do respond half the time they just come back within a few days or so, I don't have any noticeable triggers aside from lack of sleep, ect.).

The only problem with that is I can't get another nerve block bcs of the steroid issue, and when I asked her what my other treatment options were she just said "well do it without the steroids then" and didn't let me get a word in edgewise about how my pain doctor said he wouldn't do it without steroids and I know just the lidocaine will wear off within 3-4 hours anyway so how would that help outside of diagnostics(which I no longer need) BUT she did refer me back to my previous pain clinic so I am simply going to ask them to help with this bcs they have a great track record of actually finding alternative treatments for my pain when the usual stuff isn't an option. But still, it's so fucking annoying bcs I did a LOT of research about this once the nerve block worked and there are TONS of other fucking treatments. Just...such bullshit.

Sadly she also told me to lose more weight, bcs she's super convinced me being under 130lbs will magically fix my hypertension despite the fact that I've done my research and about 10-15% of your body mass is the recommended ammount to lose that apparently sends it into remission in almost every case, but I've lost about that much and it didn't do anything at all. So like, idk ma'am I don't think knocking another 3lbs off is going to do jack shit, but whatever I guess.

I'm seeing my primary in a few weeks and at this point I'm demanding a new neurologist. But in the meantime I at least never have to see that fucking pain specialist again and instead can go back to my old one that didn't suck and I'll count that as a win.

[polyhexian]

you pointed out nova storm being yellow now and it's going to haunt me wondering if ciro neili (did some of the character designs) did that as a friggin' monkey team reference

okay so the thing is Nova Storm is a rainmaker. a character that barely exists but IS from G1.

the yellow one. but the thing is that even though the rainmakers are like, quite popular, since they are seekers, and have been referenced in fanon for decades, this character did not get a name until 2015. From Ask Vector Prime. So the rainmakers are Acid Storm (green), Ion Storm (blue) and Nova Storm (yellow.)

Obviously Nova Storm (yellow) is very confusingly similar to completely unrelated character Sunstorm. The other yellow seeker.

Apparently some old fanon staight up asserts Nova Storm is just a miscoloured Sunstorm? god. who knows. Also, to be clear, despite the fact Sunstorm's name ends in -storm, he is NOT a rainmaker. completely unaffiliated. coincidental.

this is where shit gets weird

so in 2015 Nova Storm gets a name. okay, solid. We have agreed the yellow one is named Nova Storm.

Three years later in 2018, Cyberverse airs. This is the new Nova Storm.

Purple

Girl

why girl? why purple?

"well nate," you say, "isnt more girls better? why would you question that?"

well because this is slipstream:

Why are they so similar????? Both purple, both girls. like, really similar purples, too! Theres different models for the girl and boy seekers.

so this is Cyberverse Acid Storm, another rainmaker. due to, I believe, a miscommunication during production, some episodes use the female seeker model for Acid Storm and some use the male. Addressing this on twitter staff has owned up to the mistake and instead of getting defensive, rolled with it and said hey, well, its in there, so its canon! Acid Storm is genderfluid lol. And I kind of love that.

In any case you can see distinct differences in the models, so like. if Nova Storm used the male model, at least it would be different from slipstream. as it stands purple nova storm, for some reason, is one of the most frequently appearing background seekers, so it ends up, imho, being VERY confusing. especially if you arent like me and the rest of us freaks and you cant recognize every character by a picture of their ankle.

so like, to be clear, I'm pretty sure Cyberverse is actually the first time any actual STORY used the name nova storm. I think the only thing predating cyberverse is the ask vector prime. at the very minimum this is the first major use of the name, for the purple female character. at this point the connection to the yellow rainmaker is.... tenuous??????

but then we drop the card game:

which says she, so i guess... girl?

nova storm also apparently appears in idw 2019 where, again, apparently, girl? but look. yellow. YELLOW. all yellow. rainmaker.

so THIS:

this is the art attached to the ask vector prime post. what even the FUCK is that. sorry the art is nice but what IS that. is that a SEEKER? WHO is that. that PRIMARILY black with gold accents. thats not the rainmaker design or even the purple one we'd get.

i genuinely hate referencing this but the only other appearance of nova storm is as an angry birds pig costume and while its still mostly yellow i DISTINCTLY note the black cannons and yellow and hands like. thats. thats from the ask vector prime design.

...right?

this is the Iron Factory third party Nova Storm figure from their rainmakers set. this was revealed in 2019. the angry birds costume is from 2020. 2020. i genuinely think it might be possible iron factory put their foot down and said "the black and gold design fucks" and everyone forgot hes suppsoed to be neon yellow

now HERE... HERE FINALLY.... is EARTHSPARK NOVA STORM

holy shit. look at this. we have nuked the yellow from this design. she's now PRIMARILY black with gold HIGHLIGHTS. who IS this. i guess nova storm has actually now been female in MORE appearances than male????? and as far as I can tell, the gold and black design traces specifically back to deviantart user bdixonarts who has virtually no industry credits OTHER than creating the modern design for Nova Storm???? she, uh, crushed it, i guess

also an incredibly fun note i didnt know until just now: do you know who voiced earthspark nova storm? any guesses?

Nicole Dubuc. nicole fucking duboc plays her AND skywarp. nicole dubuc is the head writer. she wrote rescue bots. and final side note, tfp ratchet's catchphrase "I needed that!" came explicitly from her scripts lol. god this is so funny to me she went from recording rescue bumblebee's lines before they were replaced with beeps to just straight up being Novastorm and Skywarp in a mainline show.

anyway who the FUCK is nova storm?

dude, who the fuck knows.

[lorillee]

why.... do you..... not like.... obito?

in short? because hes annoying as hell

in long: hes just kind of a poorly written character with a kind of dumb motivation and his place in the story is just a complete and utter mess and i really cant bring myself to care enough to sympathize with him and he seriously needs to stop whining about a girl he knew twenty years ago who didnt even have a romantic interest in him like you are almost thirty whole years old.MOVE ON. i dont care hes traumatized and emotionally stunted or whatever i seriously do not he does not compel me in the slightest. his relationship with kakashi is boring and every time kishimoto tried to tell me that he and naruto had literally anything in common i wanted to blow up the entire show. the most interesting thing about his character is how entirely and completely and bafflingly self-absorbed he is. actually im just going to go ahead and share a long winded complaint i wrote since i think it does a pretty good job explaining why i personally dislike him as a character and why i think his writing is just nonsense:

naruto as a series tends to plays a bit loose with its arc structure, but we preeetty consistently get a antagonist that naruto gets a battle with (see: mist kid whos name escapes me, gaara, kabuto, sasuke, deidara, four hearts akatsuki guy, pain, etc), some of whom are decidedly more relevant to naruto than others. kabuto, deidara, and four hearts akatsuki guy arent really set up as anything particularly personal to naruto and this is fine - it works plenty well within the context of the arcs and everybodys happy. mist kid is obviously a foil for naruto because everybody hated him so much forever and in his desperation for literally anybody to care about him he turned himself into a weapon without any desires or feelings of his own, gaara is a foil for naruto in the sense that everybody hated him so much forever because he's a jinchuriki and he closed himself off and hated everybody right back and lost control, sasuke is .well. sasuke. , and pain is a fellow student of jiraiya who wants to enforce peace on the world in a way that sucks. for the latter antagonists, naruto's battles with them arent just "i need to stop this guy from [blowing up the world/running away]" but also ideological ones, having to do with the running ideas of the horrors of the ninja world/system & keeping your heart open even if you get burned & the importance of love and human connection and a functioning support system and so on and so forth.

Regarding Obito. his position of relevance in this arc is really frankly just kind of bizarre. his existence prior is pretty much entirely a reason for why kakashi is the way he is and is never brought up in any context outside of kakashi staring at that dumb memorial. and then he gets brought back to be a main antagonist of the 4th ninja war arc …?.? ?? for. reasons? his motivations are obviously relevant to the horrors of war and the terrible awful system that runs on it but the crux of it is entirely focused on rin and really makes it look like his epic genjutsu world peace plan is less about the circumstances that made everything happen the way it did and more about omg rin…… rin rin rin……………… rin?!? rin. rin . did i mention rin? in case you forSorry.got. rin. like i imagine the intention is supposed to be that the rin thing is supposed to be a lens through which to view "wow this system sucks balls and obito wants to change that" but also im really not sure if thats even the case because again. its litreally just always rin rin rin. which i think is a significant barrier to making naruto's whole thing with obito relevant also because like. okay. obito and naruto have no direct connection, and their mutual connection of kakashi is literally entirely irrelevant. if anything SASUKE is more relevant to obito by virtue of both being uchiha and also that obito was involved in the uchiha family slaughter. but kishimoto decided he didnt really care enough to bring this up so WHATEVER. I GUESS. obito's weirdness in the plot is further excaberated by again the fact that he's set up as kakashi's personal baggage and i still think its super tremendously bizarre that kishimoto decided that naruto teaching him the value of friendship was the way to wrap this up despite the fact that. it just does not fit. it doesnt fit. at All.

like. instead of dealing with the actual connections naruto (or sasuke, but hes really not contributing too much on this front) has to him through other characters, kishimoto decided what he wanted to do with obito was make him a parallel to naruto and sasuke simultaneously and did. A REALLY BAD JOB. ive already complained extensively about this so im not going to bother repeating it but this is very very very intentional as kishimoto WILL NOT LET YOU FORGET OR MISUNDERSTAND and through this attempts to shoehorn in his thematic connection and ideological clash.

(note re: having complained about the parallels thing extensively. this is a slightly edited for clarity direct message to a friend referring to a previous conversation so you cant actually find anything on this blog about it but actually while we're here i'm going to go ahead and paste my complaint on kishimoto's inability to understand what makes a foil or even just a normal parallel work as it relates to obito:

the finale as it has been its not like worlds worst but it also kind of feels strangely divorced from the. well honestly a lot of things but imo the biggest problem here is that obito has no actual genuine connection to naruto, either personally or narratively. like because what this is supposed to be is naruto is to sasuke as hashirama is to madara as kakashi is to obito except also the reverse simultaneously neither of which kind of doesnt really work beyond a really tremendously surface level view especially with kakashi and obito because they were never like even friends until the 2 minutes before obito "died" in the first place but this is mildly off topic. but anyways i have to assume kishimoto's vision was like well since sasuke and obito are like parallels (THEYRE NOT.) naruto has a narrative connection to him so it works (IT DOESNT.) like because kishimoto loves foils in concept but more often than not hes kind of bad at pulling them off because he doesnt really understand what makes a foil work. like the whole thing with omg obito and naruto are literally just the same is NOT EVEN TRUE. NOT EVEN TRUE. NOT EVEN TRUE AT ALL.

like in the extended obito flashback they take the most surface level things and then completely divorce it from any of the context its in so we can be like omg………… obito just like naruto……… when it srsly does not apply at all. like omg obito was an orphan… and wanted to be hokage…… and he cared about other people………… SO HES JUST LIKE NARUTO! and its like NO???? WHGHUG???? like sasuke and gaara work as foils for naruto specifically because they had similar circumstances growing up, and those circumstances significantly contributed to how sasuke&gaara were consumed by loneliness and hatred and shut everybody out and wanted to blow up the entire world forever and ever whereas naruto did not because he found companionship and love and never gave up or in and all of this has. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO DO WITH OBITO. LEGITIMATELY NOBODY ACTUALLY DISLIKED HIM EXCEPT FOR KAKASHI WHO THOUGHT HE WAS KIND OF ANNOYING. this is straight up completely incomparable to the isolation that sasuke & naruto experienced and to act like they're similar enough for this to work is kind of an insult to what naruto & sasuke have been through. obito's villain story is that some tremendously horrible things happened to him and he saw the girl he had a crush on when he was like 12 use the guy who he gave his eyeball to and asked to protect her as an instrument for her suicide and decided he hated everything forever and that love is impossible and we're all meant to be miserable forever and you cant be happy in reality and again absolutely none of this has anything at all to do with what naruto or gaara or sasuke went through. at all. like these situations are not even in the least amount comparable and its actually baffling. KISHIMOTO WHAT ARE YOU DOING. <- end discussion of badly attempted parallels)

however. because the bulk of obitos beef is not with the system but rather with the fact that rin died, it kind of puts a massive damper on the ideological clash side of things. like naruto is no stranger to the horrors of the ninja system and is also a personal victim of the way it functions and what it does to the people he loves, but he and obito arent so much clashing over what should be done about it (aka exploding reality and mind controlling everybody into a dream that sucks vs actually doing something about the damage thats been done and tearing apart destructive systems of abuse) but rather the importance of human connection. and like the latter isnt bad in a vacuum it can literally work fine, but obito and naruto do not share a similar ground on this front. this topic is important and relevant to naruto because the village threw him under the bus and backed over him 57 times in a row and he grew up almost entirely on his own and hated by everybody and it works for situations like gaara because theyre the same on this front, but this is NOT THE CASE FOR OBITO. obito's situation is ENTIRELY IRRELEVANT to this particular topic - yes he was apparently an orphan or whatever but literally everybody thought he was fine except for kakashi who thought he was annoying. his situation, on the other hand, is extremely very very wildly relevant to the konoha war machine both in the sense of getting sent out to war at the age of 12 and rin dying, which naruto understands maybe a bit less through his own personal experiences but intimately well through those of the people he knows and loves and who have had their entire lives upended by this. and this entire thing wouldve been exponentially improved imo if either a) a significant part of obitos downfall was a lack of connection or a refusal to open up his heart again or b) if the ideological clash was about the konoha war machine and what is to be done about it. but instead we just get this weird thing that doesnt really work for two characters who arent really relevant to each other and i seriously just want kakashi to kill that guy.BUT ITS WHATEVER .

also for additional context for the "lets tear obito apart with a pack of dogs" posts i have literally like Just finished shippuden and i was making those posts while me & my friend were watching the obito episodes. also also if you disagree with anything ive said here thats great wonderful go make your own post about how im wrong and how obito is the most understood character in naruto or something idgaf

[yatgb]

Agent 8 crumbs PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASSPLSASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE

Okay well i GUESSSS i can ramble about agent 8 🙄 if i mustt

He/She Eight forever and always ^-^ people (including herself) default to she/her but she doesnt mind! Either prns are fine any time. Also doesnt label her sexuality he's just balling

Aside from all the sanitized kamabo bullshit i think hitting her head after the fight with agent 3 actually did give her some Lasting Brain Damage, and she has problems with forgetting things. Her and Agent 4's apartment is PLASTERED with sticky note reminders, even for stuff like "close the fridge" "turn off the stove" because she WILL forget to do that part

Agent 4 made her a little cookbook that step-by-step tells her how to make her favorite foods with those menial reminders to turn stuff on and off and close doors

AND she and Agent 4 have made what they call Eight's Brain Board, whoch is a crime board style corkboard that lays out all her memories and how they relate to each other just in case she forgets again. Proudly on display in their room

Likes wood-and-metalworking just to make little trinkets, most of the time Octivus or Squidmas gifts. The definition of Hobby On The Side that keeps her hands sharp. The first one she made on the surface was a little Salmonid keychain she gifted to Agent 4 ^-^

Still writes poetry too. She doesnt mean for it to be 8-8-8 syllables they literally just. Happen like that. She'll write a poem about literally anything. she wrote one about Agent 4's freckles

I know Donny is the shopkeeper in-game but Eight is the actual store manager for the Ammo Knights in Inkopolis Square. Sheldon hired her before he moved to Splatsville and she proved to be a VERY good employee so he let her take over the store

She and Sheldon often have friendly races between who can take apart and put a weapon back together the quickest. Eight's record is less than 2 minutes for a Hydra Splatling

Eight takes her job SUPER seriously and absolutely Will Not Budge on anything like prices or weapon availability. No "i left my ID at home" or "i'm basically level 10 cant i just have that one" she does NOT care. Rules are rules and by jove she will not only follow but she WILL enforce them

^ that being said she also HATES Grizzco. She doesnt like their shady vibe and has heard many horror stories about the actual work from Agent 4 (who works there to pay off his student loans) and she really really REALLY despises how they illegally modify weapons for golden rotations. Every time she finds a modified weapon she instantly confiscates and dismantles it. It's like a spit in the face to her entire career and she will not stand for it

Very good with teenagers! Mostly bc thats the majority of who comes into the shop. She loves hearing about their battle tales and has been jotting down little plotlines that unfold in her store (like a kid trying a new weapon to impress their crush, or someone climbing up the ranks in Clam Blitz, that type thing)

She has a reputation for being super nice to everyone but really its because she just has a really long fuse. It takes a LOT to get her mad

Charger main! She's amazing with any charger you put in front of her and she's an absolute MENACE in an inkbattle. Her favorites change but "you can never go wrong with a good and standard Splat Charger"

Her favorite battle mode is Tower Control!

She also Is crushing on Cap3 but she will literally never make a move. Partly bc they live across the ocean in splatsville now but also It's Agent 3. The Legendary Agent 3. Theyre Too Cool For Me (Agent 4 has been trying to wingman them together ever since they started hanging out. the pining is mutual theyre both just flustered. Hes suffering)

Idol relationships!!!!!!! Since she is genuinely good friends with Agent 3 she's frienda by proxy with the squid sisters. They dont really have a lot in common and dont hang out much but she and Marie like being menaces in inkbattles together because theyre both cracked with a Charger and love causing problems. Imagine 2 E-Liters on the Brinewater ledge. Hell. She finds it easy to chat with Callie and they'll talk about literally anything. Callie just has that effect on people i think

She sees Pearl and Marina as cousins, partly bc Pearl started calling her Cousin as a nickname but they really are like family. She lived with them for a solid month learning the language and etiquitte before they couldnt put off their Idol Jobs any longer, which is when she started living with Agent 4. They check in with each other every day and fuckig. LOVE EACH OTHER. She always gets front row tickets to their shows

Has only met Deep Cut very very briefly while being a roadie for OTH's world tour. They indimidate her but she'll take Marina's word that Big Man is chill at least. She's also heard good things about their heroism in Alterna from Cap3 so at the moment theyre vaguely Okay in her book

Also besties with Acht ^-^ initially bonding over Side Order bullshit but she finds their practical blunt nature to be really refreshing and calming. They mostly parallel-play when they hang out together. Like cats. She really likes their new music (can't listen to any Kamabo songs without feeling Bad after :( trauma and all. Acht respects this)

Shelly and Donny absolutely LOVE HER. She always entertains their kiddie ramblings and helps them out if they need a hand at their store, and theyre always welcome to work at her store if theirs is slow and they want something to do. She teaches them more about the weapons in a hands-on way so they have more to tell the customers rather than just parroting Sheldon

Speaking of, she's also great friends with Sheldon! Technically he's her boss but hes a very chill boss and she's been invited to family gatglherings outside of work and such. A good friend to the Shellendorf family!

"Hey eight how are you so cheerful all the time you have a very busy job and lots of friends to keep up with! Whats your secret!" Shes literally just in love with life. Thats it. After dealing with so much shit underground and nearly losing everything in Kamabo she has a huge appreciation for life itself. She relishes in the good and accepts the bad because at least she has a choice to experience it all. That being said can trauma responses go away she doesnt quite like those

(Hiiii :3 watch out here comes the extremely thought out backstory i made under the cut)

The reason shes so good with Chargers is actually because she was training under a Special Forces unit in the Octarian Army

She was known in her class for being super smart and quick on her feet but she just CANT build up any muscle mass, and the wasabi supply unit were already thinking of allowing Certain Octolings to use Chargers and Splatlings without being Octocommanders or Octosnipers, so they decided to guinea pig her with a Charger along with a smattering of other similar Octolings

She became like. SUPER good at using Chargers and a lot of her peers would call her The Next Marina because she surprised everyone with how cracked she was at like everything they threw at her. She never liked this comprison due to wanting to just Be Herself

She was also known for being extremely caring and empathetic, which landed her in hot water for speaking out against the way she and her fellow colleagues were treated as faceless soldiers, and wondered if plotting against the Inklings was even worth it st this point. She famously got in MASSIVE trouble for insinuating that they let The Great Zapfish go and was in Detention/Jail for like a While and nearly lost all her progress climbing up the ranks

Alsooooooo :3 in my personal canon she was part of the squad to escort Callie into Octo Canyon. It was her first time ever on the surface and once she got a taste for the real sun she needed more of it

(I know Octo Expansion is likely happening the same time as Splat2 Hero Mode but it makes sense for my canon for it to happen After)

Also she's 18 st the start of Octo Expansion just to tie back into the whole 8 thing they had going on

The whole hypnoshade thing was also thrust on Callie as a surprise and like. It's not fun to be Surprise Brainwashed so of course she fought back before the hypnoshades took effect. Eight still has a scar on her shoulder from where Callie dug her nails in. That experience was also the final nail in the "i gotta get out of here" coffin

Even though she had made up her mind to run away to the surface, it still really hurt to leave her life behind. She had real friends and even something romantic going on with someone special, as well as having actual good standings in the army with a bright future ahead of her, but the surface was more worth it in her eyes. being able to have her own life instead of one she was forced into was so appealing. Her friends think she's selfish and definitely resent her now (even though theyre fuzzed and barely remember her in turn)

Oh and also her name used to be Maia Idachi :3 but since she doesnt know her old name she can't find her file in Cap'n Cuttlefish's dossier. She doesn't want to go by facial recognition in case she mistakes her fime for someone else's and remembers something that never happened to her yknow (got Maia from amai, the japanese word to describe something sweet to tie into her being caring and empathetic, and Idachi from Idako which is the word for a species of Octopus)

[chaifootsteps]

Hey, i dont know if you remember me but im the anon that sent you and ask about how i had a final work for my literature class being about creating a ring in hell inspired by the Divine Comedy, so if you are interested this is what i made:

First, we had to create a new sin that wasnt mentioned on the original text and then design the ring around it and a punishment , so i choose egocentrism.

I really liked the idea that Vivziepop had for a circus in hell, so i kinda of stole it, but i dont feel bad for that because that lady already stole a lot of things from other people 🤭.

I used my idea for a rewrite of "vivziepop's take on hell" where the circus asspect actually matters (instead of being only used for aesthetics) and the sinners are the ones being punished and tortured by being forced on torture acts, in this case, humiliating acts that destroy their pride and ego.

I made an example by showing some guy who in life was a really strong warrior, and that made him belive he was better than anybody else and would constantly tell other people they should admire him and that they would never be as strong as him.

In hell, he now lost all his muscles, being really thin. And he would have to perform the act of weight lifting, since being strong is what made him so egocentrical on life.

But the things he had to lift were things that normally are really light, like pillows and feathers. But they would be insanely heavy on the dude, making him feel like he was the weakest and it would always ends with the guy droping on the floor, crying and tired. Then he would be forced to repeat everything again.

And like that, every sinner would have its own circus act that was designed to degrade them and attack the thing that made them so prideful on life.

And the ones who perfomed these acts and tortured the sould were a new species of demons a came out with called the "cirquimps" (i couldnt came out with a better name sorry lol). I even made a drawing on how the look:

They are short, with big black eyes that look souless, having 3 arms (2 are "normal", and one is long and formed like a whip), and they all wear clothes that resemble clowns and circus artists.

Then i made the story of Dante seeing this ring.

So, in my country, the systems of notes is from 1 to 12; 1 being the lowest obviously, 6 being aceptable, and 12 being the best of all.

In this job, the teacher gave me a 11! She said it would have been a 12 if it wasnt because i forgot to make the story from Dante's perspective, but she loved it!

And thats the story of how my ideas of rewrites for Vivziepop's hell gave me a great grade for my final proyect, thank you Viv for creating such a bad take on hell that helped my form better ideas!

Well, there you go! Congrats on your 11, Anon, it sounds well deserved!

[delilahcalicocat]

"Stay back dear, it's bad"

Warnings: Blood, Mentions of Injury, Talk about injury, mainly fluff, small amount of cursing (not too much, just the words: Damn and Hell)

Pairing: Darby Allin & our lovely OC. Melody Moxley (Jon's little sister)

Summary: after Revolution, Jon Moxley's little sister Melody, Meets Darby, Only because she's working in Medical while she heals from her match on dynamite 2 weeks prior

WC: probably 1k or 2k-ish (I'm sorry)

Author's Note: I have a couple oneshots or drabbles, I'll be making. Refraining from the smut since my Brain is filled with a tooth-rotting amount of fluffy stories, and Original Characters. And I will not be making smut fics with gore in them, this is just a oneshot of Jon's sister meeting Darby after the match at revolution, since the image of him lying there has been like permanently ingrained into my head.

[Melody's POV:]

After a long night of tending to so many injured wrestlers, I found my worst case of injury. I had to watch the matches since I was taken off the card 2 weeks ago. I hurt my wrist pretty bad in a match with my older brother, but besides that. I'm having fun working in medical that was until revolution, after the main event. I was practically screaming internally, I saw a wrestler go through a panel of glass. So I got my glass removing items ready, it was going to be a long night I could tell.

But I stood outside the medical room as Darby walked by, he gave a weak smile and said

"Stay back dear, It's bad" He limped into the room before sitting down

"Well, I'm the Worker thats on right now. My co-worker clocked out 2 hours ago." I huffed out with a frown

"Wait. So you've been dealing with half the roster for over 3 hours?!" He said

"Yeah, such is my life." I replied

"Well Damn. You have it rough." He said

"Alright, enough Chit-Chat, we gotta get the glass slivers out of your back and stitch you up." I sighed, putting gloves on.

I started removing the slivers, they were in there deep, I also had a towel for every other second I had to wipe this man's back off, after 1 tedious hour of work, I got all the slivers out, they now sat on a tray, I counted 299 slivers of glass.

"How the actual Hell did you manage to get 299 Glass slivers in your back?" I asked him

He didn't respond to my question, but I continued on. I started to stitch his head up, and I had to wipe his head occasionally. But that's fine.

"You've probably lost more blood then my brother in his match." I said

"Who's your brother?" He asked me

"My brother is Jon Moxley." I sighed

"Oh, You're Melody Moxley?" He said

"Yeah I am, Former woman's champ. Until I got injured" I sighed again

"How'd you get injured?" He seemed curious about my story

"I got my wrist slammed against an exposed turnbuckle, then had said wrist get crushed by a chair." I said with a sigh

"Oh, Damn. That had to hurt" He said

"Yeah it did." I said, rolling my eyes

[Darby's POV:]

This girl, despite us meeting like an hour ago, she seems quite tough. I like her style and how she is with medical so people don't make the same mistake as her. But I am impressed that she works for medical, even having a broken wrist.

She seems quite chill aswell, I like her.

[Melody's POV:]

After 2 more hours of work, I finished stitching up his head. I let out a audible sigh, and put the Bloodied towelette with the, for a lack of a better word. Stained Glass slivers, that tray was gonna end up most likely in the Hazmat or Dangerous Bin in the medical Office.

I got him to stand up, and I walked him to the door.

"Go to catering and get some food, but be careful." I warned him

"Uh.. actually, I was wondering if you.. maybe wanted to go to catering with me?" He said

"Oh- uh.. sure" I said, a small tinge of pink flushing my cheeks.

I grabbed his hand and we went to catering, we sat down and chatted a little

"So whats your name again?" He asked

"Melody, Melody Moxley" I said with a smile

"I'm Darby, Allin" He smiled back

"Nice to meet you!" I smiled widely

The End! ♡