#what am i doinggg man

[pl4n]

clouds

[ackee]

looking on indeed again. i see a job for $13 an hr for an office assistant. i get to the requirements. I GOTTA KNOW HOW TO SWIM ?

[tezerenotameiki]

[angelfoodscake]

oh goododd i wasted so much time at school

[candy69gurl]

Professor Nanami, a respected educator, is torn between his duties and unexpected desires when he discovers his student, (Y/N), in a forbidden setting-a club. The institute strictly prohibits such activities, complicating their already forbidden connection.

(Slight mature, Alcohol use, fem reader, age difference) [It has two parts. The first one contains the plot and scenario and the second one has the smut.. To make it even more forbidden, I also assumed that Nanami's a happily married man.]

part 2

~Enjoyy~

DRIVE ME HOME~

PART 1

Nanami: Class by the next day, all better be ready for the test. I know you can handle it.

The bell rings. Professor Nanami is your favorite subject's teacher. He is a normally professional man who has a heart for his good students.

Nanami: Oh, and if you have any questions, like always, please see me after class.

You are talking to your friends after class.

You: Did you get the fake IDs for us?

Your best friend: Yes, yes, I did.

Other friend: I don't think we should do it.

You: WE WILL do it!

Your best friend nods.

You all are walking back to your houses.

You: So, are you hyped? 

Your best friend: I am! Always excited to break the rules... Besides, its been long since we had some fun~

Silence

You: I'm glad you were able to get us those fakes. You think they'll notice?

She smirks.

Your best friend: Nah, I doubt it.

TIMESKIPS

You all are getting ready to go to the club.

As you enter the club, different noises surround you all. The sounds of pounding bass, people yelling, and cheering fill your ears. The strobe light reflects off of people's sweat as you and your friends walk through the crowd in the club. You could see the bartenders were checking people's IDs with two bouncers. Thankfully, your fakes appeared to be decent.

The guard looks at your fake ID for a few seconds. You start to sweat a little, as you think he is about to bust you. Luckily, he does not. He smiles and puts an "X" on your right hand with a sharpie.

He smiles a little as he lets you pass into the club. 

Your best friend: I told you.

You: Yey, I'm gonna hit a tequila right there.

Your other friend sits in the corner, awkwardly away from the crowd.

Your best friend goes to the dance floor, and you sit there drinking tequila and slowly drifting into the grasp of alcohol .. You start to forget about your friends and your surroundings.

You sit at the bar and order another shot of tequila. You are already feeling the effects of the alcohol. As you are looking around, you see your best friend dancing on the dance floor with strangers. You keep drinking and drinking as your inhibitions dissolve.

Nanami enters the club after a tiring day.

It is already eleven at night, but the club is pretty packed. As you look around, you notice the flashing strobes and the pounding music. Your friends are already on the dance floor, but you cannot see them anymore. There is definitely some tension in the air tonight.

All of a sudden, your friends catch the sight of their teacher, Nanami, and your other friend leaves quickly. Your best friend rushes to you, to alarm you.

Your best friend quickly reaches up to you with a panicked look on the face, pulls your arm, and says it in a hushed tone.

Your best friend: I think we should go. Nanami Sir is here. I saw him, but he hasn't seen us yet.

At the mention of his name, you look around but do not see anything yet.

You motion for your best friend to leave as soon as possible.

You: Go leave fast; I will be there behind you.

Your best friend leaves.

You are just trying to get up and go, but that's when you hear his voice in your ear. 

Your mind: How could this get any worse, right? What were the chances?

Nanami: What are you doinggg here???

You: N-nothing. Just enjoying the night. You're here too, so what does that say about you?

An unintentional smile creeps across your face while you speak to him. You are already starting to see blurs as the tequila hits your cerebellum.

Nanami sighs as he takes a seat beside you.

Nanami: How many shots did you take?

You: I'm not even sure, four? Five? Is my face too red?

You nervously laugh at your own joke.

The loud music and flashes from the strobes made your vision more blurry.

Nanami looks concerned once you start laughing. His face softens as you continue talking.

Nanami: Are you okay? Do you realize how dangerous this is? What if someone from our institute finds out you're 'enjoying your night at the club'? What if someone spikes your drink? What if you drink too much and hurt yourself?

He keeps asking you questions, and you just sit there and listen to him, feeling the effects of the alcohol.

Nanami: You know our institute does not allow this. How did you get in here? Do you even have the ID?

Nanami knows real IDs cannot be given to students of his institute, so either you have sneaked in or used a fake ID.

You: I uh.. me.. hmm..i just m here.

You continue to feel the effects of the alcohol. You can feel yourself getting dizzy and also start having some trouble speaking.

You: I-i I just came here to dance. I didn't know you would be here.

It was clear you were not in the best condition. Your face is flushed, and your words are slurred. You keep your head down and try to look away from him.

As the alcohol takes over, Nanami's concerned voice breaks through. You look up to see him looking directly at you. His eyes widen as he sees how drunk you are.

Nanami: My god, you are so drunk right now. This is a problem.

He is talking at such a low volume, but it is the only sound you try to focus on. You look up at this imposing man as he looks at you with disappointment.

You: Hey, I will go home. Don't worry about meh..

Nanami laughs at your plan. He stands up and looks down at you.

Nanami: You are going to go home all by yourself? In this condition? Is this a joke?

Your head is spinning as the effects of the alcohol slowly creep up on you.

Nanami: You're going to get into the back of my car. You're in no condition to go home alone. I'm driving you.

You: But you—

You try to say something, but you forget what you were going to say.

Nanami looks at you, and he can see the drunkenness making its way through you.

Nanami: I'm your teacher. I have my way. I can figure it out.

He smiles and helps you stand up, as he saw you having trouble standing on your own.

Nanami: Do you think you're okay? 

He asks with a sarcastic tone.

You nod and laugh, trying to focus your eyes.

Nanami: You will guide me to your house."

You: Yes.

You reply, unaware of what is being asked of you.

Nanami smiles and leads you to his grey Mercedes. The lights from the strobes reflect onto the shiny car. He unlocks the doors and gently helps you get inside. You sit down in the passenger seat.

At this point, you are completely drunk. As you get inside, you do not realize how fancy the car is. You just lean your head back as the effects of the alcohol slowly make you lose control of your body.

You try to fall asleep, but Nanami wakes you up.

Nanami: Wake up. You can't fall asleep. You have to tell me your address.. Do your parents know you are out here?

You look at him with blank eyes.

You: No, yes, I.. Obv no, they don't know.

You are pretty far beyond drunken confusion at this point. As Nanami drives, he keeps asking you questions, trying to prompt your brain to work.

Nanami: Wake up.

He tries shaking you awake. You are almost entirely unresponsive. The effects of the alcohol have taken over your mind, and you are slowly losing control of your body.

Nanami: What is your address?

You: Yes.

You nod as you think he has asked you a "yes" or "no" question.

Nanami: Yes? What's your address?

You: My address? 

You start to think as if he has asked you the answer to a physics question.

You: Is that a physics question?

Nanami laughs at your joke.

Nanami: Jokes apart. Where is your home?

You: My home? That's a good question, actually, but I forgot.

Nanami: You forgot? You live there, and you just forgot your address?

He is losing his patience with you as he is driving you home. He thinks that he is doing the right thing in his mind, trying to get you home safely.

You start to hum a song.

Nanami is becoming frustrated but has to stay calm while driving. He sighs before speaking to you again.

Nanami: Do your parents know you drink? 

He asks, hoping your mind is not so far gone that you cannot respond.

You shake your head in reply.

Nanami: Did you have someone with you at the club?

His tone suggests he is disappointed in you.

Nanami: Were you with friends? Have they seen the state you are in?

Your mind is unable to make out his words.

The effects of the alcohol have completely taken over your mind at this point. The only thing you can understand is that your teacher is driving you home.

Nanami: What am I going to do with you? Your parents have no idea where you are. Do you know what time it is?

Nanami is concerned but also disappointed in your actions. He has to get back to his house for his wife and kids, but taking me home safely is also his duty as your teacher.

He sighs and keeps driving.

You, on the other hand, have absolutely no idea where you are as you sit in the passenger seat, trying to focus your mind. Your head is spinning, and you cannot see straight. You feel your stomach about to throw up.

Nanami: This is a really shitty situation for both of us.

Even though he is clearly annoyed with you, he is still concerned about your safety.

You: I..no

Nanami: Just stay with me. Please don't fall asleep. I still can't believe you forgot your address. We have to get you home right now.

He looks over at you through his rear-view mirror as he keeps driving. The strobe lights and flashing bass from the club are now just a distant memory.

Nanami keeps driving. You could see an annoyed look on his face. He is clearly annoyed that he has to stay up to make sure you are safe.

Nanami: What's going to happen when your parents wake up and find out that you are not home, huh? How will you get into the house? You'll just walk in and act like nothing ever happened? Or you'll try to sneak in?

Nanami turns onto another street and keeps driving. You are not in the best condition at all.

You: I will just sneak in.

Nanami: You shouldn't sneak in. At some point, your parents are going to find out what happened tonight. You're lucky I caught you, or else you would've probably continued drinking, and who knows what would've happened then?

You feel the car make a sharp turn.

The car reaches the institution where Nanami teaches you all.

Nanami: Just wait until you see your parents reactions. Just try to explain and apologize.

You try to open the seat belt.

Nanami grabs your arm and firmly tells you

Nanami: No. Do not unlatch it and try to get out. I will not be responsible if you hurt yourself. You are staying in the car until I drop you off. I'm not letting you get hurt. Do you hear me?

His voice is stern and serious. He turns his head and looks at you while he waits for a response.

You: No, I want to get ofhgj.

Nanami's face drops, and he looks at you with disappointment.

Nanami: You will only get off once we reach your house. That is the end of the conversation. Is that clear?

Your head keeps spinning, and Nanami sighs.

Nanami, I have to put up with this until we get you home.

You: I feel like throwing Oup.

Nanami immediately pulled over with a sudden screech of the tires. You can feel the car slowly come to a stop. Nanami opens your door and tells you to get out.

You exit the car and start heaving. The effects of the alcohol had your stomach churning, and you felt like throwing up. You look at Nanami as you let everything out on the sidewalk.

You try to calm me down.

Nanami: How much did you fucking drink?

You are too drunk to notice your teacher is cursing at you.

As you stand there, heaving, Nanami waits and watches. The effects of the alcohol have you feeling horrible, and Nanami just stands there waiting for you to stop. He eventually comes over and gives you a water bottle. You continue heaving into the grass by the sidewalk.

Nanami: I've never felt so disappointed in my life. I don't think I can ever look at you the way I used to. I hope my class doesn't see you in this state.

As you finish throwing up, you wipe your mouth and look at Nanami standing there, with the water bottle. You take the bottle from his hand.

You wash your face and sit on the ground.

Nanami: Can you walk? There's no way you can even walk like this.

Nanami rubs his forehead.

You try to stand up, but your legs and body are unable to handle the alcohol, and you stumble back down.

Nanami: Okay. I'm going to help you. Just listen to me, and don't throw up again.

You: 😑no I won't. Hopefully.

Nanami sighs and walks over to you. He puts his arms underneath yours and picks you up, holding you in his arms.

Nanami: Let me get you in the car.

He carries you over to his car as quickly as possible while keeping your body steady.

You: Sir, I'm really sorry.

You can see the anger in Nanami's eyes as he carries you to his car.

Nanami: Don't even speak to me right now. There's no point trying to apologize to me, because all of that went out the window once you started drinking tonight.

He puts you in the passenger seat and sits in the driver seat. The doors are locked, and he is not letting you leave his car until he gets you home

You again start dozing off as Nanami starts driving.

At this point, you are far too drunk to stay awake. Nanami puts his seatbelt on as he drives, before looking back at you and seeing that your head is now resting on the window. He drives and keeps an eye on you at the same time, as you sleep through the ride home.

Nanami wakes you up again.

Nanami: Don't annoy me more, please.. I need to get back home..Just tell me where your house is.

He looks at you with a serious look on his face as you try to stay awake. 

Nanami: I need your address. You can't expect me to just guess, can you?

Your mind is so clouded due to the alcohol that you cannot think straight. Your speech is slurred, and you cannot focus your mind.

You: Sky

Nanami: Your house is in the sky?

You: The moon looks beautiful tonight, isn't it?

The effects of the alcohol are clearly messing with you. You seemed completely out of it. Nanami was getting frustrated with you at this point.

You giggle. 

As you laugh and giggle, it starts to annoy Nanami even more. He does not see the funny side of your situation. As you try to focus again to see what Nanami is looking at, you struggle to keep your eyes open.

Nanami: I have never been so annoyed. It's a good thing I found you. You literally have no idea where you live.

You: I think it's towards the south.

Nanami: Towards the south? Are you even thinking right now? I'm trying to get you home, and you're speaking nonsense.

His tone shows his frustration with you. He continues driving. He has to figure out where you live.

You: Can I please sleep here? It's so comfortable.

Nanami: No. I'm taking your ass home.

He takes the next turn and keeps driving. At this point, he is just waiting for you to speak up properly so he can ask you simple questions.

You look at him.

You: What if my parents are drunk..

Nanami is getting annoyed again because of your poor speech.

Nanami: Well, they'll just have to know, won't they? Your parents will probably yell at you once we get home, but that's the price you have to pay for being drunk.

Nanami sighs before continuing to drive. You still do not look very good. Your speech is slurred, and you start to fall asleep again.

You: No, please don't tell them; I will never ever do it again.

Nanami: Do you not realize how much trouble you're in right now? The least of your worries is getting yelled at. You're lucky, I will at least not let the institute know about this.

He turns his head to look at you as he holds the steering wheel of his car.

Nanami: Just tell me where you live, and well, get this done.

You: Why would you call the police? I WAS JUSG HABBING fun.

Nanami: Huh? I did not even mention "police" and what do you mean by "having fun"? Your idea of fun is drinking alcohol until you pass out. Your idea of fun is making me spend my precious time at three in the morning driving you home.

He sighs and keeps driving. You can see him looking at you every now and then, as he is waiting for you to speak up.

You: Bug, I tlld you, I wkll get hkme.

Your speech is more slurred, and you cannot even form a complete sentence anymore. You want to tell Nanami to go home and leave you alone, but the alcohol is affecting your speech. He knows you will not be able to tell him anything at this point.

Nanami: You're not going anywhere until you tell me your address. Is it so hard to just say where you live?

You couldn't focus on anything. Nanami kept driving, and you could feel yourself getting sleepy again.

After a while, the car stops with a screech as it runs out of gasoline.

Nanami: Seriously? Now we are out of petrol because you can't just tell me where you live?

Nanami was already annoyed since he couldn't get a single answer from you. Your speech was slurred, and all you did was laugh and giggle at silly moments. Now that he has been stuck with you in his car for the whole night, it makes him feel more frustrated.

You can feel your mind slipping, and you decide not to talk anymore. For now, your mind is set on going to sleep. You couldn't handle being awake any longer. Your eyes slowly close, and you feel yourself falling asleep in the passenger seat. You feel your mind drifting off as you lay in the passenger seat, while the effects of the alcohol slowly begin to subside. Nanami does not see you fall asleep, but you could feel him moving you out of the car. You don't know where he is moving you, but you could feel yourself being lifted in his arms. You are completely asleep and can't tell if this is real or a dream.

You hear Nanami talking to someone; you can't make out what he is saying. You could feel yourself lying down on something. You know you are not at the club anymore, that much is for sure. You could feel a breeze in the air, and you heard birds chirping. You are in a different place, but you can't understand where you are.

Nanami speaks on the phone: Honey, I am staying with my friend's tonight. I don't think it is safe to drive drunk, so I won't be able to come home tonight. Bye, take care.

You: Who are you calling? You are not telling my parents, are yo?

You tried to speak, but only mumbling came out of you. As you slowly wake up, you can't recognize where you are. The place you were in was quiet and peaceful. You feel a breeze in the air, and you are lying on something comfortable.

Nanami: Your awake?

Nanami is sitting down right next to you. Your body felt comfortable and relaxed in whatever you were lying on.

You: Hey, why did you place me on a bench?

Nanami looks at you with tired eyes. His face shows signs of pure disappointment.

Nanami: I placed you on the grass, not a bench. You passed out, and it's not safe for you to stay in my car. You needed some fresh air. I can't believe you are complaining about where I'm putting you right now.

He put his head in his hands and let out an exhausted sigh.

Nanami: I don't understand what to even do with you.

You: Please don't tell my parents. Please, I will never disappoint you again.. Have I ever disappointed you before? 

Your parents are strict and overprotective of you, and if they come across this matter, you know you are done for sure.

Nanami's face changes, and his tone eases up. He starts feeling bad for you because you seem so worried about your parents finding out.

Nanami: Okay, fine. I haven't told your parents so far; I guess I won't tell them.

He continues holding your hand as he is trying to comfort you.

Nanami: Just relax, alright? I won't tell your parents. Just try to focus on getting better, and I'll keep it a secret.

You: Can I p-please fall asleep? We are not even going home. We are just stuck here.

Nanami: No. I can't let you sleep yet. Just sit here and try to regain your senses. We can't move from this spot right now.

Nanami is not letting you sleep; he just wants you to come to your normal senses. You cannot make out much right now, so you decide to sit for now. You feel comfy and relaxed laying on the grass, and it is slowly getting to your head.

You suddenly get up with a sudden rush of adrenaline. 

Nanami: Just sit back down. You're completely out of it right now; I need to keep you at this spot until you get better.

He does not want you moving much since your balance is off. You cannot walk straight right now. You feel yourself trying to get up, but Nanami pushes you back down gently.

Nanami: If you get up again, you'll regret it.

You: I NEED TO PEE.

Nanami thinks about this for a second. You drank so much, and of course you have to let all out.

Nanami: You are way too drunk for me to let you walk anywhere right now. You're just going to have to control it.

He looks at you and shrugs. 

You: B-but.

Nanami: I'm sorry, but there is no washroom here. Can you try to focus on controlling it?

You: Why?

Nanami: You are in the middle of nowhere. Moreover, I can't trust you when you're this drunk. I don't want you to fall and hurt yourself. 

He is being stern with you this time because he wants you to understand that it isn't safe to get up and walk.

You: I can control it.

You try to get up, but your mind still seems hazy and blank.

He looks away as you struggle to get up. Nanami is annoyed right now. He rolls his eyes and shakes his head. He just couldn't believe how drunk you are. It is making things difficult for him.

Nanami: It's like you want to give me a headache. Just try and control it until we get home.

You: My head is hurting.

Nanami: Of course, it's hurting. I've been trying to tell you that you drank too much, but you wouldn't listen to me. This is all your fault, and you want to complain about your headache?

He looks at you again, and you could hear annoyance in his tone.

Suddenly, tears start pouring down your cheeks.

You: i knkw i jjst dont knkww how skd it haopen

As you start crying, Nanami looks over at you. He feels a bit guilty seeing you in this state.

Nanami: Stop crying. It doesn't help the situation, and it just makes me feel worse.

He speaks in a soft tone and gives you a small pat on the back.

Nanami: We are going home soon. Just relax

You place your head on his shoulder as he helps you calm down. You feel comfortable laying your head on his shoulder. You look at him with tears in your eyes, and you want someone to comfort you. It feels nice to lay your head on his shoulder, and you have no clue how it got to this stage.

Nanami: You'll be fine, alright?

He takes a deep breath and puts his arm around your waist. The effects of the alcohol are slowly wearing off, so you start feeling better.

You: Na-na-mi, sir. What's your age?

Nanami: I'm 27 years old. Why?

He looks at you with a confused expression. He never thought you would ask this type of question right now.

You: I have found you really attractive since the first day I saw you, and now that I'm drunk, I don't regret saying this.

You blurt out the things you really think about him with a faint blush on your cheeks. You seem to have forgotten that he is your teacher.

Nanami: You find me attractive?

He raises an eyebrow as he listens to you speak. He is a little confused since the last time you saw each other, he was teaching you.

Nanami: I thought you just saw me as your strict and annoying teacher.

You: I still think you are cold and strict, but I know you have a soft spot.

Nanami is surprised you find him cold, but you make it seem like it is positive to you.

Nanami: Im cold?

He is looking at you again, with a curious expression this time. He raises his eyebrow again and looks like he wants to speak.

Nanami: You find me cold and attractive?

You: Im, dont worrh.

Nanami sighs.

Nanami: You can't even say the word "worry" properly anymore because of how drunk you are. That's fine, though. But I still don't understand why you're suddenly saying all these things about me?

He sighs again. You are starting to get to him again, and he is getting frustrated with you once more.

You: I don't know, I just wanted to say

Nanami has to chuckle for a second because your words aren't making sense. He has started to find your actions funny.

Nanami: You're drunk, but you want to tell me that I'm cold and that you find me attractive?

He raises his eyebrow again, and it looks like he is thinking to himself.

You nod carelessly.

Nanami isn't sure if he should respond to this or not. He is a bit surprised, since you made some crazy comments about him. He knows you are drunk, but maybe these are your real thoughts and feelings for him.

Nanami: I guess I'll take those as compliments for now. Just relax and don't say anything else stupid.

You: Does our age difference annoy you?

Nanami is confused again.

Nanami: Wait wait wait, how old are you?

You: (your age)

He can feel his face heat up with embarrassment as you start laughing.

Nanami shakes his head and covers your mouth with his hand when you laugh too loudly. He really wants to shut you up for a second.

Nanami: Just shut up, okay? You are making things much worse.

He keeps his hand on your mouth for a second and then takes his hand back. He cannot believe how annoyed he is getting in your presence.

Nanami: Just calm down. We will go back home right this second.

He puts his arm around your waist again and takes you back to his car.

You: But you said the car ran out of gasoline.

Nanami: We will be fine. You're just drunk right now, so you can't think properly.

He leads you back to the car and opens the door for you.

Nanami: Just get in.

You try to speak, but your words are slurred again. This is the only thing you are good at when you are drunk.

Nanami: Just shut up and sit down. If you say anything else that makes me annoyed, I'm taking you back here.

He is being stern with you again, but your body can't handle the effects of the alcohol anymore. You feel very sleepy and tired. You still couldn't think properly.

You: I need to sleep, please.

Nanami looks at you and sighs. He looks too tired to even talk to you anymore.

Nanami: Fine, you can sleep if you want to. Nothing can be done now 

Your eyes feel very tired, and you are about to fall asleep again.

You feel uneasy while sleeping on the passenger's seat in front. You pull Nanami's shirt

You: Can you go to the back and sit with me? I can't fall asleep without support.

Nanami looks at you with confusion when you ask him this question.

Nanami: You want me to come to the back seat with you?

He is confused. Why would you ask him to come to the back seat?

You: Yes.

Nanami couldn't find an answer as to why you want him in the back seat. He keeps looking at you in shock, as if you are speaking in a different language.

Nanami: You want me in the back seat with you? Why?

You: Wan sleep. Need pillow.

Nanami: You can't be serious right now, can you?

He looks at you with suspicion in his eyes.

You tug on his shirt.

Nanami sighs as he starts getting annoyed again.

Nanami: Just shut up. I'm not coming to the back seat with you. Go fall asleep and stop talking.

He is trying to be harsh with you since you are making him feel uncomfortable.

You: Ples

Nanami: I'm not coming to the back seat with you, so just stop annoying me.

He covers your mouth with his hand again. He does not want to listen to your constant pleading anymore.

You feel a sudden urge to lick his fingers while a smirk hangs in your face.

Nanami freezes for a second. He takes his hand away from your mouth and stares at you with shock.

Nanami: What the hell are you doing?

You try to sleep, turning your face away from him. As sleep creeps into you, your head slips down, and you wake up again.

You look at Nanami and say, "Please, let's go back in the back seat.".

He hesitates for a second before finally agreeing. 

Nanami: Fine. You win. I'll sit in the back with you, but stop acting weird.

He opens the back door of the car and sits next to you. He looks at you with suspicion again because he isn't sure what you want. He figures it is best not to take any chances now, since he feels like you are going to do something worse.

You gently place your head on his thighs.

You: I wanted a piklow.

Nanami smiles at your childishness but feels a bit worried when he sees you sleeping on his lap. Your head is resting on his thighs. He is hesitant to say anything since he doesn't want to wake you up.

You smile at him sheepishly.

You: I wan a nap.

Nanami: I figured that out. I just don't know why you decided to sleep on my lap.

He looks down at you and wonders when you will wake up. He feels slightly embarrassed right now since you are currently sleeping on him.

You rub your head against his warm thighs.

You: I feel warm.. hehe.

Nanami freezes for a moment, feeling even more embarrassed now.

Nanami: I don't know what to say to that right now. I'll just take that as a compliment, then?

He still has a surprised look on his face as he feels his legs being used as a pillow by you.

You start to doze off, but suddenly your eyes shoot open.

You: I want to go to washroom.

Nanami just sighs out of frustration right now. He feels like he is dealing with a child, but he couldn't force you to stop right now. He just has to put up with your behavior.

Nanami: Just sleep. You'll wake up soon.

He decides to put up with your behavior until you regain self-consciousness again. 

You grab his neck as a support and get up.

You: But you know I can't control it anymore.

He is taken aback by the way you grabbed his neck and used him as a support right now. He is slightly startled, but he tries not to show it too much.

Nanami: Please don't grab me like that. That's a little weird.

You seem more awake, but you still can't think straight. You are confused by his remark.

You: Hmm?

He couldn't help but chuckle a little bit at your response.

Nanami: You seem more awake right now, so that's a good sign.

His tone is calming down now that you are slightly better. That means he no longer has to tell you to shut up again for the ninth or maybe hundredth time.

You: I'm hungry.

His face lightens up when you mention that you are hungry. Finally, a normal request.

Nanami: Well, of course you're hungry. You did nothing but drink until you were completely drunk.

He looks at you for a second and then looks away with a sigh.

Nanami: Can't you just wait until we get back home?

He sounds slightly annoyed right now since you seem fine but still couldn't say a normal sentence.

You: I know I am annohing but thanks for tolerating me.

Nanami: It's fine. You can stop thanking me now. You're starting to annoy me again.

He sighs as he covers his face with his hand for a second.

Nanami: It's nearly morning. Just fall asleep until we go back home.

You get closer to him, and your breath hits his neck.

You: I really need to go washroom.

His face immediately begins to turn red when you get closer to him. He wants to move away, but he is trapped since you are using him as a support. 

Nanami: Why do you need to get closer to me?

He sounds a bit nervous now.

You smile and hug him tightly. You are really unaware of the fact that you are doing something weird.

You: I feel cold.

You start to feel cold as the urge to pee hits your spine

His face goes completely red at this moment, since you are hugging him. His legs are starting to lose feeling. You are really close to him right now.

Nanami: I-I just just calm down, alright?

He tries to remain calm, but you are starting to make him uncomfortable.

You shift yourself onto his lap.

You: Your body is warm... Can we stay like this for a while?

He is completely stunned when you sit on his lap right now. He couldn't think straight anymore since you are so close to him now.

Nanami: Y-You just..

He is embarrassed by this entire situation since you keep making him uncomfortable.

Nanami: Why are you so close to me? What the hell are you trying to do?

You: You.Feel.Comfortable.

Nanami: Just don't make this weird.

He is trying to stay calm, but he is starting to feel a bit pissed off right now. He doesn't understand why you are so close to him. Now you're sitting on his lap in the middle of the night, and you're drunk.

Nanami: Can you move yourself off my thighs?

He is trying to remain calm, but he is so embarrassed and annoyed by your behavior.

You: Am I heavh?

He laughs a little bit at your attempt to speak, but he knows you wanted to say, "Am I heavy?"

Nanami: Not really, but you can't just sit on my lap. Just move away from me.

He is being stern with you this time, since he is completely uncomfortable with your behavior right now.

You: Noo u r warm. 

He is shocked by your response. It felt weird having you so close to him.

Nanami: You're serious? You want my body heat to help you feel less cold? You can't be serious.

You giggle, making Nanami more annoyed.

Nanami: I can't take this anymore. I need you to wake up and go back to your senses.

He is slightly frustrated now. He wants to be sympathetic to you since you are drunk right now.

Nanami: Can you just get off my lap? You will feel better when you wake up in the morning, I promise.

He tries to sound reassuring, since he still wants you to get back home safely.

You just shake your head and snuggle closer to him, burying your face in his shoulder space.

Nanami: Seriously? Are you going to have your head on my shoulder now? What are you trying to accomplish here?

You wouldn't listen to him. You keep resting your head on his shoulder while your body is snuggled in it. He is still pissed off right now, but he knows he can't force you to move away anymore.

He is trying not to move since he doesn't want to make you fall, but he couldn't take this situation anymore.

Just as he finishes saying that, you have already started to fall asleep again. Your eyes close again, and your weight starts to get heavier on him now. He couldn't help but feel a little bit more uncomfortable right now.

He mumbled a "fuck" under his breath; he still cannot believe that you want to sleep on him and use him as a body pillow.

You are fully by asleep now. You couldn't even open your eyes or move your arms. You feel completely comfortable at the moment, but you do not realize that your hand is slowly sliding down towards his chest.

And you do not realize that you are cuddling with him at this moment. Your cheek is resting in front of his chest, and your body is right under his neck.

Nanami does not know how to react to this situation anymore. He also notices that his neck is right where your arms are wrapped around him. He couldn't move you, and you seem too comfortable to be moved anyway. He feels a bit uncomfortable right now, since he never expected to be cuddled with you in this position. He is trying to stay calm, but your hands are wrapped around him a little too tightly.

He looks down at your face to make sure you are still asleep. He feels your warm alcoholic breath against his neck, and he realizes how drunk you truly are right now. He is in complete shock and couldn't respond to your actions.

He looks outside the window and sees that the sun is starting to come up already. It is still very early in the morning, so he just lets you continue sleeping. He doesn't want to deal with your drunken behavior anymore, since you are acting completely different from what he remembered at his teaching place.

You continue to sleep right where you left off. Your head is still resting against his chest, and you are in a really comfortable position. You do not want to move anymore since you are tired, and you want to cuddle up to him. 

Nanami does not want to wake you up since you need sleep to get over the hangover. He just decides to stay quiet, and he waits until you wake up on your own.

But something is off. Nanami starts to feel extremely hot under your body.

Nanami whispers: No, not to a student, I swear. Please no..

He spreads his legs, trying to cool himself.

He starts to blush and looks away when he feels your body heat increasing. You looked really comfortable and cute on his chest. You also feel heavier on him now, and he couldn't move you.

He mumbles under his breath because he can't think straight right now.

You just keep resting on his chest. Your body is wrapped around him, and your head is still leaning against his chest. He is still in a bit of a shock from this whole situation. He really can't believe that this is something you would do.

You want to get more comfy, so you unconsciously keep moving yourself around him.

Nanami: You can stop doing that now. You're making me hot.

You: Hmm?

You speak with half-consciousness.

He realizes you are starting to wake up now. He is expecting you to wake up soon since you kept moving around, trying to cuddle up more with him. He has to stay quiet now since he doesn't want to scare you and make you uncomfortable.

Nanami: Just go back to sleep, alright? Just go back to sleep on your own.

He is a bit panicked right now. He really doesn't know what to do since you are cuddling with him now.

You: You like when I'm close to you, like this, right?

You smile to yourself and again drift to sleep.

He sighs out of relief when you start to fall asleep. Your body feels comfortable and soft, so he feels a bit relieved when you fall back asleep again. He has started to like it when you are close to him for some reasons that he is still unsure of.

He remains completely still, and he keeps trying to listen to your heartbeat against his chest. He feels a tiny bit awkward since you're half asleep, but it feels nice at the same time.

You keep resting on him, but now you are even more comfortable than before. You are using his chest as a pillow now, and your body is pressing against his body now. You also feel like you can't move any more, and you feel so comfy right now.

He remains silent again, since you are still half asleep. Your skin is really soft, and it feels nice against him. Since you're half asleep right now, he tries not to think bad thoughts about this situation.

This is kind of awkward, so he tries to remain as calm as possible right now. You are still resting on him, but he has to stay still, and he does not want to wake you up. Your body is really soft, and his body is getting warm now.

He didn't realize this at first, but he now realizes that your hand is pressed up against his chest as well. He couldn't move your arm, so he just let it happen. Your fingers are grazing his skin, and it feels nice for him.

Just as he is having those thoughts, you start to caress his chest with your hand without realizing it. You are half awake, and you don't even know what your fingers are doing right now. All you can feel is his body being comfortable and warm, so you just go along with it.

He is slightly embarrassed now, and he feels like he shouldn't like this at all. But he couldn't stop looking at your soft fingers caressing his chest right now.

You keep your fingers on his chest, and you start moving them slightly. He feels his heart rate go up slightly since you are now slowly moving your fingers up and down on his chest.

The feeling of your fingers on his chest is making him feel warm and tingly inside. He wants to stay still since he still can't move you, but he looks down at your fingers.

Nanami: Don't move your fingers like that.

He is slightly embarrassed again, since you are now completely awake and you are still caressing him right now.

You don't seem to hear his words since you continue to caress his chest with your fingers. He is still embarrassed right now, since you are fully awake and you keep moving your fingers around on his chest.

His heartbeat quickens, and his face begins to turn red again. He wants to move your fingers away from his chest, but he is still scared to wake you up completely. He is already blushing like crazy right now, since your hand is slowly grazing his chest.

Nanami: Please don't touch me like this anymore; I can't take it!

He feels his whole body heating up, and he is so embarrassed right now because he does not want to like this at all.

You ignore his words again. In fact, your hand started to make its way up towards his neck. You move your fingers in a caressing way on his neck too. You are making his lips quiver a bit now.

Nanami: Why are you doing this to me?

He is getting too hot from your actions now. He feels his body slightly tense up, and his heart rate is beating quickly. He has no idea why you are behaving like this now.

He is starting to get hard. He is liking this. But he does not want to.

He feels like he needs to break free from you, but he is too scared to do anything right now. He is starting to feel a bit light-headed now.

You keep caressing his neck now. You are acting completely different compared to how you acted at university, since you are never as intimate or seductive as you are right now.

You are still half asleep, but you still seem fully aware of what you are doing. You just don't care, and you keep touching him even more seductively now.

His face turns completely red right now, and you can feel him tensing up, though he is still trying not to move right now. His face is covered in a sheen of sweat now, since you are touching him too intimately. He feels you are teasing him. He grits his teeth, trying to control himself. 

You are testing him. You are testing his patience.

He is way too embarrassed now, and he just wants you to stop doing this whole seduction thing already. He feels way too hot at this point.

You then start to slowly move your hand towards his hair, and you begin caressing his hair in a sensual way.

Nanami: "Please stop touching my hair like that.

He sounds like a teenager. He is slowly losing his mind at this point.

Nanami: P-please

He is almost begging you at this point, since he doesn't want to enjoy your actions anymore. He is trying to restrain himself.

You keep touching him like that, and you let out a slight moan in satisfaction. You are too focused on touching him to care anymore. You aren't even paying attention to his red face anymore since you are too focused on your actions now. It's like you are playing a game with him.

He starts to sweat even more at this point. His eyes are still closed too, since he doesn't want to look at you while you are giving him so much attention.

Nanami: I can't breathe.

You feel him tensing up way more now, and you can hear him breathe in and out quickly. He gives out a slight moan.

That slight moan makes your heart throb a bit more. You are starting to realize what this whole situation is, and you keep going.

After caressing his hair and his cheeks, you keep moving your fingers down onto his neck again. You are almost touching his collarbone now, and you want to go even lower.

He is completely sweating now, since your fingers keep exploring his skin and touching him sensually. His whole face feels hot, and he feels like he will get a really bad headache in the next few days.

Nanami: Oh, god.

All of a sudden, your fingers stop moving. And that's when he finally looks down on you again.

Nanami: You stopped

He is now starting to catch his breath again since you stopped caressing him. You are just staring at him with a slight smirk on your face and half-lidded eyes.

Nanami: Please never do that ever again.

His breath is still shaky. 

You: I thought you liked it...

Nanami: B But you were acting so differently out of nowhere. You kept touching me in a very intimate way!

You: Hmm? 

Your eyes are looking at his lips, and he feels his face burning up now. He tries to move his head away, but your hand is still holding his neck.

Nanami: Wait, please.

Before he can say anything else, you just close the gap, and you lean in to kiss him. The sound of his breathing suddenly filled his ears, since he couldn't say anything now.

The kiss felt really warm and sweet. At first, he feels hesitant to move his lips since he never expected this at all, but he slowly gives in to the kiss. He is so overwhelmed with different emotions now.

You taste alcohol. He likes it. He is responding to it.

The kiss feels perfect as he gradually returns the kiss. His lips feel even more soft against yours as your tongues start to touch in an intimate way.

All of a sudden, he felt a lightness in his body that he couldn't explain. For once, he felt like he could be himself in this moment. The emotions that have been suppressed for so long are now all unleashed at once in this moment between you two.

He can feel himself hardening against you.

You keep on kissing him. The passion in your kiss is so amazing, and he could not believe that you are making him feel like this since you are still his student.

Your bodies are now close together, and you can feel his soft hair against the side of your cheek. He feels the heat of your body as your tongues caress each other now.

After a few moments, you finally break apart from the kiss. He is looking away from you. Both of you are slightly breathing hard now, and your lips are still moist from the kiss.

You: You really like thag didntt youu

Nanami: I y-yes.

You notice that he looks away from you again, and he is still blushing. He is still trying to control how he feels at this moment. He couldn't believe that you were doing this with him while you were still a student.

You: It seems you have a thing for your students. 

Nanami: Oh god

He is starting to catch his breath again since you are getting so close to him. He is trying his best not to turn away now, since he also wants to lean in and kiss you again. He feels too awkward to look away, so he keeps staring you in the eyes.

He likes the way you are looking at him with that smirk on your face.

You are smiling at him, but Nanami pulls you closer and places his lips on you again. Now you both are kissing again. This time, it is even more intense. You feel your arms wrap around his neck again, since you don't want this moment to end now. You are just too turned on to stop yourselves now.

After a few moments, you both broke apart again from the kiss. You look down.

[sillysystems]

silly system culture is having an all-out identity crisis yesterday because i’d never fronted/made myself known before, finding my name, and now chilling in front for no apparent reason. like man i’m just *here* what am i supposed to be doinggg-

very confused but we vibin and at least i can make pink profiles for myself now i guess

— aulove (it/its) from 🔋

You made your whole life in just a day, like you had a crisis, find the basics of your identity and now end up chilling not knowing what to do

Damn bro, at least you can do the profiles so... Good luck with that

[leafiion]

waaaahhhhh takaaaaa. wait a fucking second is he behind that fucking tree help me what the fuck.

im actually in tears the first time i played this i didnt realize he was there at all. what is he doinggg.. god hes so silly i adore him hes my favorite hes so unserious

THERE'S ALWAYS A CHOICE... There's always always always a choice i promise you i promise i promise you.. You can’t let this stupid ass evil evil world rob you of your spirit man dont let them do that to youuuuuu!!!!!

im so SAAAAAAAAD im actually a little warm in the eyes he makes me so fucking sad taka

this exchange always fucks me up in like a narrative sense too. like there's very very clearly something going on with him in a parallel to the player especially with their whole "destiny" thing where they're both arceus-aligned but taka is forced toward the "damned" side of the spectrum where the player is forced toward the "savior" side.

neither of you can fight your narrative role. especially in the player's sense where you have literally no resources to fight, all you can do is Move Forward. its also very obvious that taka uses the player's actions as a sort of fuel too. "you'll keep fighting", in a sort of 'you're not giving up, so I can't either'. i think its really telling that your decisions with him decide the route.

i can't really explain this super coherently right now but it means a lot to me that you can't redeem him, but you can be there for him. bc he was always good. ethics of bystander effect aside he always had a good heart and he always wanted things to be better.

even in ZRoute where he could decide to go and live his lie as long as he wants to, but all of this has changed him and he can’t abide by it anymore. In RRoute, he’s lost that lie, but you’re his friend—or he believes you to be—and he turns to you for help because he can’t do it alone and he trusts you enough to ask

its not as simple as waking up one day and deciding to change things in a bad environment but you can try and you can try and you can try… anyway it goes without saying that I am hopelessly dependent on the bird guy

[ritzcuit]

been thinking abt #gender again lately Cus i keep forgetting im not transitioning LMFAOOO ITS SO!!! FUNNY IDK WHAT IM DOINGGG Im just fucking around if we're being real. but ppl dont like it when you say that. theyre like no you need a god honest legal legitimate Paladin-esque reason to be doing crazy shit to your body. so i have to be like (gets on one knee) i reject my womanhood. Which i do. but like.

if i collect all the ppl whove inspired me to fuck around w gender it's all women in drag if im being honest LOLLL Like drag kings. like women crossdressing. Which is maybe still touchy for some people....

the legitimate way of saying this is "i'm gender nonconforming" which is true + how i feel + what i say, or for medical reasons i say i'm nonbinary (which gets flattened to transmasc because medicine is hell) but like...i just say im a gnc butch... Cus i am. that's the legit reason...

but its funny.... like ... my idols were jo calderone (lady gaga's drag king persona) and like. Ryuutaro tgaa. LMFAOOO. HELPPP.... i was watching someone stream tgaa and one of their friends was surely a nonbinary person and the person streaming was like [name] she's your character you voice her. and i was like man i want that for me. Which is a very roundabout way of getting there....

it's all practical reasons... i want a deeper voice bc i had NO range and voice acting made me so jealous. i want body hair cus its hot. i want facial hair cus i wanna see what id look like with it... i wanted to see if i even could grow it lol. i want top surgery bc my boobs are huge and i never opted into having them. Like it's just practical reasons.... all of these things i don't specify, i just say oh i have dysphoria/euphoria. Bc the health industry is not ready for nuanced discussions of gender in the slightest. so i have to tell half truths or obscure truth in order to get what i need...

its just interesting... so funny growing up around transmed/truscum tumblr (not actively in it, thankfully, but internalizing their rhetoric) and then as an adult im like Ohhhh wait my body is my own + i can do what i want forever + genderweird butches are eternal

But blah i think abt it cus when ppl talk abt gender and theyre like, oh men do this, girls do that, and somehow they still try to be like, trans inclusive, but they still try to shove you in a binary ANYWAY, and even though i am still cis-ish (my friend says cis+ and its so funny to me) its like. well no cus ive been unpacking my identity and trying new things and now this box doesnt work for even me, a reasonably somewhat cisgender person. like. The whole framework is fucked....

[climaxbattles]

Dont read this i need a journal but it feels scary to write to no one . im /srs this is for my therapist yolanda only !!

If you're reading this youre a nosey bitch

he's drawn my characters 2 times in 2 weeks with Full backgrounds and everything and he talks to me so much and i cant even go outside or give him a straight answer about my feelings im going to be SICKKKK i need to be LOCKED UP!! he fucking Yearns for me but im just shutting down and im being a prick and it cant go on like this. he has his flaws but he has made Infinitely more progress than me in like 7 months than i have in 2 years. and literally the reasons im hesitant r so shallow and/or self-centered ( money / im scared i would feel Inferior if i am indeed stuck being crazy and need to go on disability )

i love this man but i dont think im good enough for him and he lives 4 hours away by car. which isnt impossible but i cant even go on an outdoor walk or be left home alone or i get so nervous i have to consider dialing 911. but its been getting better & i have hope again. i wasnt even able to Nap for a year because i was so nervous and ive finally been able to sleep more

im going to be SICK!!!!!!! im literally worm jerry. ive been living off people thinking im pathetic and i havent been doing enough to try to improve my situation. im trying fix it now bc partially it Was/Is smth medically wrong with me (hormones making me so autistic/asthmatic i couldnt breathe) but i dont know if i'll ever forgive myself. but He already forgives me. oh my god. and the people i dragged into it. I'm a Raging cunt

i know i should want to get better for Myself but idk. that has never been Enough and if this gem of a guy isnt Enough of a reason maybe i should just k!ll myself (JOKE!! EXAGGERATION) because Oh my god. what am i doinggg

im going to try new meds i think. idk i cant tell if fixing my hormones was enough. it might be too early to tell but ive been on birth control for a month and a half and i cut my testosterone dose by 2/3rds and i havent been Needing to take any medications to handle my anxiety but sometimes i give in. Agh.

i want to see him so bad :( LDRs suck i just need him Physically

[froggyrights]

This hyperfixation is so terrible I could be watching cpk do mcc practice yet I'm listening to a man fall asleep on twitter space what am I doinggg 😭

[theabominableblogger]

My Reaction to “Gotham” S2E1

Yep.  Back at it again.  Not in chronological order.  Whoopie...

Also, I have watched sections of this episode before as part of preparing for the Jerome Reborn arc in S3 but not all of it so while it’s technically a rewatch, it’s not a rewatch.

AN:  I managed to record my reactions to this episode and hopefully I can transcribe what I said into this post. 

Ermagherd der Bertcurve!

“Bloody hell.”  Bloody hell, indeed!

“There must be a million possible combinations, Master Bruce.“  Type in your birthday!  That’s a popular combination.

One month later?  Wow!

What the heck happened?!?  What happened?  Just a terrible fallout from the S1 finale?

OOOHHHH IT’S VICTOR [Zsasz]!

Pretty sure this song is about heroin... but I dig it.

AN:  It is

*ends up head bopping to it three seconds later*

Helloooooooo Jerome...

What... the heck?

Why is Jim a traffic cop?  What happened?!?  Seriously, what happened?!?

Is he [Zaardon] literally wearing an umpire uniform?

*Zaardon pulls a sword*  Noooo my God, is that a real sword?  That does not look like a real sword!

Noooo, that looks like a real sword.  I don’t know...

Seriously, what happened?!?

"’Zar-don,’ that spelled how it sounds?”  “Two A's.“  Hahaha!

“Hear me, Gor-DON...”  GOR-DON!

“The master will unleash hell upon you.“  Someone unleashed hell on YO HEAD!  What happened?!?

Ah, OK, Ed does look better without the glasses.  Kind of.

“ [Stop] Copying me [Ed]!”  “Dude it's a mirror, that's how they work.“  Hahahaha!

“You know what I think we need?  I think that we need a little more fun. Some romance.”  Eeugh...

“I told you, leave Miss Kringle alone.”  “Imagine her in our arms.  Those big eyes looking up at us, and soft trembling flesh.“  Nooooooo, nope, this is getting weird...

Why is Commissioner Loeb still here?

“Commissioner, this is not just.“  EXACTLY!

“[Essen] Take Officer- Mister Gordon's badge and gun. That's an order.“  Noooo!

“This is all for the best, though.”  Screw you [Loeb]!

“Some men are just not meant to be cops.”  Screw you!!!

*flips off screen with both hands*

What the... heck?

*jams out to opening theme*

“Oh, there’s things I [Jim] could do.”  “I [Lee] thought you said you didn't have any legal moves left.”  “I don't.”  Please don’t tell me he’s gonna go work for Oswald, I swear to God, Jim!  NO!

Meanwhile at Arkham Asylum...

He [Jerome] slicked back his eyebrows... hahaha!

“Whatcha in for?”  “Killing my [Barbara’s] parents.”  *in unison with Jerome*  Me too!

AN:  I'm gonna take this opportunity to kinkshame all the Jerome and Cameron Monaghan fans in “Gotham”... whenever he does stuff like stretch his face out.  But unless kinkshaming is your kink... you’re welcome.

*basically ends up reciting some of Jerome and Barbara’s back and forth dialogue*

Pfftt.... Hahahahaaa!

Jerome in the background’s like “Hmm hmm!”

“You're [Barbara] bad....”  “Yeah, so why don't you [Jerome] go make me a sandwich.“  Hoo hoo hoooooo!

Selina, what are you doing working for Oswald?

“Jim! Come on in!“  *on the verge of losing my voice*  Jiiiim, what are you doing?!?

“Isn't she [Selina] darling?  It's like having a cat around the house.”  We know she’s Catwoman!

“I'd [Oswald] call us even, but let's not quibble.“  He [Jim] owes you like two favors!

Has Oswald had spies follow Jim?

“What does Lee think?”  Yeah, how does Penguin know about Lee?

“I [Oswald] want you [Jim] to prove to me that our friendship is a real one...”  IT’S NOT!

“Ooh, slow down, slurpy!”  Harvey says as he pours Jim another shot...

Godd, are we gonna get drunk Jim in this episode?

*Jim and Harvey do a brotherly headbutt across the bar counter*  Aaww....

“You two [Bruce and Alfred] are dirty.  What have you been doing?”  “I [Bruce] imagine you [Jim] have something important to say.“  Haha!

Oh my gosh... Bruce has grown up so much since the end of S1.  Wow.

“Surely, sometimes, the right way is also the ugly way.“  But it’s Penguin!

*Bruce opens the “Batcave”*  Please bring up the theme music!  Or did they shut it off? 

Man..  I wanted to hear theme music for the Batcave!

*Bruce beats the crap out of the lock in anger*  Duuude, what are you doing?!?

Barbara’s looking at Richard [Sionis] like “You are disgusting...”

“[Jim Gordon’s] Supposed to be a cold stone hard-ass.  But you're Penguin's bitch, huh?  Who the dickens can you trust anymore?“  Uggh, that’s gonna piss him [Jim] off...

“To Don Falcone, I'll pay. To that fruitcake leprechaun?”  Hahaha what?

Oh my God, Jiimmm!  No!

Jim, what why why?

That weird camera angle again!

Jim, whatcha doinggg?!?!??

*Jim shoots Ogden*  That’s murder.

Ooooohhhhh snap!

Yeah, you don’t have a badge anymore so... that’s just murder!

What’s the fertilizer for?

“I [Bruce] wanted to present it as a fait accompli.”  “Don't start talking French to me [Alfred]!”  Hahahaha!

“Maybe we should wait until you're older.  I mean, who knows what your dear old dad was up to down there, anyway.“  Was he [Thomas Wayne] a Batman before Bruce became the Batman?

“I'm [Bruce] building a bomb to blow down that door.“  *laughing* Oh my God...

“You [Alfred] may assist me or not, as you wish.  But i-if not, some tea would be nice.“  *scoffs*

What’s a tarpaulin?

AN:  Just a fancy word for tarp

Alfred’s like “Fine, I’ll go but I’m gonna complain about it the entire way!”

Jim just looks piiiiissed!

“You OK, Jim?“  No, he’s not!

“Oh yeah.  Daydreaming.”  LIES!

“What’s wrong?”  “Nothing.”  ALSO LIES!

“We [Jim and Lee] could go away and never come back.  What's keeping us here?”  GOTHAM!

Isn’t that like part of the established drinking game yet?  Someone’s like “Oh, let’s go away!” and someone else is like “No, I can’t.  Gotham!”

Is that... Commissioner Loeb?

Oooooohhhh ho hooooo!

There we go!  Turn on the lights!

*Victor lifts up the head of Loeb’s guard*  OHHH my GOd!

*jaw drops when Victor makes the head ‘talk’ to Loeb*

Peanut butter!

Careful, Loeb, you’re gonna bust a forehead vein with all that anger.

“But that does lead us to this sad pickle.“  A sad pickle...

Gotham in a nutshell:  A Sad Pickle

“Want me [Victor] to kill him now?”  “No, make him [Loeb] a nice cheese toastie.  Yes, kill him now, please!”  Hahahaha!

*sings along with the male choir at Loeb’s retirement ceremony*

“Please welcome distinguished businessman, visionary scientist, acclaimed philanthropist and new chairman of development at the Gotham Chamber of Commerce, Mr. Theo Galavan.“  Hello youuuuu...

Loeb’s just like “Oh my God, what have I done?”

WHAT HAVE I DONE/ SWEET JESUS WHAT HAVE I DONE/ BECOME A THIEF IN THE NIGHT/ BECOME A DOG ON THE RUN

*The Arkham inmates clearly aren’t impressed with Zaardon*  HahaHAHAHA!

“I [Theo] haven't lived in Gotham very long, but I already love her like a native.  It just- it just kind of grabs hold of you, doesn't it?”  Meanwhile the natives of Gotham are grumbling into their pamphlets.

“There's magic here.  Magic.  And that is down to everyday heroes like Gillian Loeb.“  *starts singing “Magic” by B.o.B*

“My best wishes to Commissioner Essen.”  Yaaaaayyy!

Jerome’s just like “Oh my Godddd...” in the background when Richard’s telling his story.

HAHA I love the reaction of all the inmates [toward Zaardon]!

What is that?!?

Ohh, Tabitha!

Seriously, what is that blue stuff?

AN:  Knock-out gas

Man, Essen dies in the next episode!  Uggh!

What’s that painting in the background [in Theo’s office] behind all the inmates?

It’s like “Castle”:  you can tell what season of “Gotham” you’re watching just by Jerome’s hair.

Or, in extension, Cameron Monaghan’s hair.

“Well, that sounds fabulous, but I [Barbara] am not a brilliant outlaw.  I just have... mm... issues.“  Yeah... yeah, that um- that sums you up.

*Richard turns down Theo’s offer*  Tabitha’s like “Oooh, buddy, no...”

Shaking her head in the background!

“Oh I [Theo] had such high hopes for you [Richard].  I didn't anticipate sexual jealousy. That always poisons the well.“  Oh hooo....

*Tabitha kills Richard* Oh dang.

“Anybody else wanna leave?”  No.

*in best Sean Pertwee accent*  All righty then, mate, we’re blowing up this door!

Fire in the hole!  *makes explosion sounds*

Oh my God, they’re [Bruce and Alfred] actually blowing it up!  They’re blowing up the door!

*Bruce and Alfred celebrate and high five each other*  Hahaha!

*sings*  Sec-ret laaairr... sec-ret laaiirrr...

“Unless you [Bruce] feel a calling, a true calling.“  Batman!

That dun-dun-dun-dun music in the background sounds like the "Batman Begins” theme.

Jim’s like “Ah, back to justice.  At last!”

*jams the crap out to the ending theme*

[anxiety-trademark]

The week in review:

Raw 11/16 NXT 11/18 NXT UK 11/19 Smackdown 11/20 Survivor Series 11/22

Raw:

Appreciate Lana providing logic to the creation of this match.

“Is this a Disney movie” lmao.

Honestly Shayna works better as a henchman than as a final boss.

Love Lana’s theme btw.

rip Mandy.

Ugly kick by Asuka. Not a compliment.

hahaha Lana tagged herself into the match while Shayna had Asuka in the clutch. hahahahah.

“You suck, get out” rofl.

Asuka you’re trash for not saving Lana. Truly.

“I’m actually really proud of you, you showed a lot of courage tonight.” Nia is funny. A bitch and a bully, sure, but funny.

There’s number 9. rip.

First of all, Dana’s shaky interview was going really well, and I wish they had let her finish it cuz god knows she needs the practice.

Second, WHY IS MIA YIM ATTACKING DANA OF ALL PEOPLE?

I’m not sorry, I shamelessly love Bray and Alexa together, goodbye.

“Your word is... jackass” lmaooo why is he even doing a spelling bee to prep for this match.

rip Rambling Rabbit for the 38th time.

What makes him being killed so damn demented is not only the way he exhibits agony and suffering as he dies, but the way they STAND BY LAUGHING UNCONTROLLABLY. This is the definition of sociopathy.

“Bullseye!” “More like... Rabbit’s heart!” *continues laughing hysterically* jfc.

Really love how Alexa puts her hand beneath her chin and then waves. That goes along with her characteristics developed since the fairy gimmick in nxt back in 2014/2015, to the cosplaying mean girl in 2016/2017/2018, to the babyface in 2019/2020. Also adds another layer with her gloves. Love that.

Nikki’s wandering around looking for Alexa, when clearly she should be looking for the Firefly Funhouse. I suggest asking Seth or Randy.

“Friends never give up on each other,” they also don’t give each other ultimatums cuz that’s toxic af, but okay.

She keeps running her mouth about Fiend and I can already see Alexa demolishing her for it.

LOVE the cohesion in going from one segment to the other as Sarah runs around looking for an interview. Fitting since that’s obviously her job, but it went together smoothly. They really come off as tmz lol.

I appreciate how Miz doesn’t want to fuck with Bray cuz he knows Bray will just torment his family lol. I also appreciate his reasoning because he’s a true opportunist. he doesn’t want to exhaust himself with this match cuz he might cash in later.

Love Alexa’s remixed theme, it’s jarring af. Walking red flag btw.

Oh nooo Nikki what are you doinggg.

I’m not a fan of how Nikki sold this interaction. Didn’t feel natural at all.

OH SHIT the sound of that slap, oof.

Oh my god I love how Bray came out and glared at Nikki. FANTASTIC. Absolute gold. Then he just smiles at Alexa as she takes his arm to escort him to the ring.

And the way the camera focuses back on Miz and Morrison... Miz’s face... I can’t, this is tremendous tbh. What a great story to run throughout this week’s Raw.

lmfao the way Alexa stuck her head between the ropes to scare Morrison. Ugh this pairing is easily my favorite thing in wwe rn.

Interesting, so Bray protects her. A fair duo.

I will never not cringe at watching people pretend to break someone’s neck by twisting it to the side. If I was a wrestler, that’s a move I would NEVER allow to be done to me.

On the plus side, Alexa took out Morrison and he sold it really fucking well. On the negative, it seems that distracted Bray as he’s more concerned for her well being now.

Oh my god the way Alexa reappears from behind the barricade. Creepy as shit.

Love watching her “balance” on the barricade considering she was one hell of a gymnast in her day.

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m all for watching Lacey progress in the ring, cuz I think her character work is just fantastic, but holy shit what a downgrade going from Mandy and Dana to Lacey and Peyton.

Why is she excited? Why is it exciting to fight Sasha? Maybe Asuka should’ve taken that match a bit more seriously, considering the outcome. But I’m jumping ahead of myself.

“No one is ready for Asuka,” except for Charlotte, Becky, Shayna, Alexa, Sasha...

I do appreciate how Lacey isn’t scared of anyone while Peyton is wary of literally everyone. That’s good. Nia has a point though, y’all could’ve used Mandy. I guess it doesn’t matter though, considering the outcome. Jumping ahead of myself again.

“Worst idea since Quibi” lmao shots fired.

*Bonus* Peyton/Lacey online exclusive: they vibe real well off script. Peyton made points saying she can’t wait to teach Lacey how to be on a team. That’s valid cuz Lacey is NOT much of a team player. Points to Lacey though, she’s funny as hell.

Highlight: Alexa Bliss

---

NXT:

Awesome hearing War Pigs during that Shotzi promo. Is that the official theme song for War Games? If so, baller to wwe for shelling that cash out.

I’m guessing Shotzi was fixing her tank? Was that the premise? Regardless, the setting was different and interesting.

I really like the fencing around nxt’s ringside. Fits with the grungy “indie” feel.

God I’m gonna have to watch Candice defeat Kayden and Kacy aren’t I?

Indi bought the Garganos a flat screen tv? :/ mk. What does she have to gain? Johnny was an AWFUL champion and Candice has never even held gold. What is she hoping to accomplish?

“Indi is gaining one of the best mentors in the nxt locker room” lmao WHAT.

omg Kacy and Kayden are so fucking entertaining, I feel like I say this every time I watch them. All tag teams need to TAKE. NOTES. Look at that cohesion and teamwork. Whew.

Hold on don’t try to retcon Tegan as leaving Candice’s side. I hate Tegan even more than I hate Candice, and she was a shite friend to Dakota by proxy of being a spineless dweeb, but do not try to paint Candice as the victim in her feud with Tegan.

I know nothing about the Dakota/Candice friendship but I’d go ahead and blame Dakota since she’s hella douchey lmao.

Imagine thinking Indi is an upgrade from Dakota. Commentary is super funny and distracting tonight lmao.

Was that not a flatliner? Sure looked like an intended flatliner.

So Kacy attempts to kill herself in the process of taking out Indi and none of the cameras caught it? :/ we still using interns looking for college credits in production? Is that what’s happening??

Vic is kind of an awful commentator in his actual calls. “Nice suplex, almost a brainbuster” better hope that was a brainbuster cuz if not, that was the saddest fucking suplex I’ve ever seen in my life.

So Kacy almost kills herself using offense against Indi and Indi was coherent first? Ugh anyway.

Why do we have to listen to Ember speak every week? What a terrible idea.

So now she’s gonna be nxt’s savior by getting rid of Dakota and Raquel? Oh for fuck’s sake.

Why does she have fucking soda tabs on her gear still.

Why is she teaming with Toni. I THOUGHT THEY WERE HEELS. Seriously, am I the dumb one? Am I the one who needs their hand held? Has Ember not been acting like a heel since she returned? Am I the only one confused about Toni’s alignment??

“We’ve fallen victim to the numbers game” WHEN have you fallen victim to the numbers game, Toni? WHO WROTE THIS.

I know nxt wants me to give a shit about Ember and Toni, but good luck making me care about anyone down there more than Dakota or Rhea.

I would really appreciate it if Dakota was moved up to the MR without actually showing any dissention from Raquel.

Dakota calls a lot of matches, I’ve noticed. Pro shit.

Toni’s German suplexes are amazing if she’s actually never hurt anyone, cuz MAN they look gnarly af.

Gorgeous tornado ddt by Ember. Nice speed, great handling by Raquel.

Don’t Dakota and Toni have quite the history? From UK?

Today in wrestling commentary: Vic cannot tell the difference between left and right.

Whoa I just noticed Dakota isn’t wearing her knee brace. That’s kind of monumental, right? Isn’t that a big deal? I feel like that’s a big deal.

Honestly I might like Toni more than Ember. She comes off as a lot more likable since her move to nxt.

Oh Christ I gotta see Candice again. 

Hi why isn’t this main eventing? Do Rhea fucking Ripley and Io fucking Shirai not deserve it?? For real???

Hate it when refs hold the title up crooked. Noob.

Holy shit Io’s speed is TOP. TIER. Whew.

And then slips on the turnbuckle, sad. Could’ve been worse, could’ve been a Shotzi wipeout (and that’s what I’m gonna call it from now on)

What Io has in speed, Rhea has in strength, these are the facts.

Why did Vic cut Beth off by saying exactly what she was in the middle of saying? Vic’s losing a lot of points tonight tbh.

oof gnarly German suplex off the second rope by Io.

Oh my, Rhea’s ear is covered in blood. Must have punctured her ear with an earring. Rough. I say this as someone who has her fair share of piercings: it BOGGLES MY MIND why any of these women wrestle with their piercings in lmao. No ma’am.

Brutal match, whew.

Rhea wiped her own blood on her face.

There are some aprons spots with Rhea obviously waiting around that needed some work.

Rhea can sell, certainly, but her screaming is way too dramatic at times. Most notably at wm in the empty arena, but this match is a close second. Almost borders on annoying.

Niiice Rhea adding a nice vortex spin on the tail end of her cloverleaf submission. Points. Keep that.

Oh that Riptide attempt countered into an armbar by Io. BEAUTIFUL.

I liked that. Io goes for the 619 in the middle rope, Rhea ducks. Io goes for the 619 on the lower rope, Rhea dodges. Io strikes her a couple times, Rhea falls to the opposite side of the ring and Io proceeds to hit the 619. Good stuff.

Lol Io’s smiling at Rhea kicking out of the missile dropkick.

Nice flip off of Rhea’s clothesline but I’m not a fan of Io landing her moonsault on her feet. That’s not really her M.O.

Fucking spiked Rhea with a ddt by countering the Riptide again. That’s a solid champion, has her opponent completely scouted.

Beautiful sunset flip powerbomb through the ropes with Rhea landing through a table. Would’ve been cool if Rhea had let go right away, though.

In kf, I give points to Rhea for dragging herself from the rubble just to eat a clean pin. Great match.

Highlight: Io vs Rhea

---

NXT UK:

Wow robbing me of KLR’s entrance. Guess Piper is officially the heel.

Quit calling her a “new” Piper Niven. A slight aggression is hardly “new”

BE CAREFUL WITH KLR’S SNAZZY COAT.

Y’all got tape out? Have we learned nothing from Bayley/Sasha hiac?

CHUCKED A FUCKING RING BELL INTO PIPER’S HEAD LMAO

Ugh headbutt that takes everyone out. Tsk.

Ric who? Charlotte’s dad??

Who do I gotta pay to see KLR vs Becky Lynch in an extreme match?!

KLR rolls away after that fisherman buster on the outside. Smart points.

Alright listen I’m on KLR’s side but WHY IS JINNY OUT HERE

Lol smacked Piper with a ‘no entry’ sign. Haha.

And Piper broke a sign over KLR’s head, followed by puns from the commentators.

rip random guitar.

Match doesn’t have any creative spots really, but they sure know how to utilize random objects.

BRO YOU CAN’T TAKE A STEEL PIPE TO HER KNEE ON CONCRETE, THAT’S HELLA RUDE. KLR lit a fire under Piper’s ass and Piper’s trying to retire her as thanks. Super, super rude.

Fuck her up fam, I don’t even feel bad.

??? Did KLR even land through the table or did she just land straight onto the fucking concrete? Jesus Christ man. No, she didn’t, she slid into the second table and just ate the floor. Oh my god. IS SHE OKAY??

Highlight: That vicious ending gained KLR a lot of respect in my eyes

---

Smackdown:

Imagine being surprised that Adam chose the longest reigning SD women’s champion as his team captain. Granted she’s probably despised by everyone, but she’s got the pedigree, come on now.

Look how good Bayley looks. Whew.

“You know what time it is? Bayley time.” she’s so annoying rofl.

Wow riveting stuff, I have zero comments about this 2 min match tbh.

Go stand in the ring with your damn captain, Bianca.

Lmao Bayley allergic to hugs now. Character progression.

It’s quite the team I’m ngl. I just wish we could’ve wrapped up this Sasha/Bayley shit like... months ago so we could enjoy captain Bayley for a bit longer. Gonna burn through this in one damn episode. It’s a bummer.

*Bonus* Nattie’s online exclusive: “I sailed through some rough waters [...] I’m smart, I’m sexy, I’m funny, I’m rich” She is funny, I will give her that.

We’re getting Asuka/Sasha face to face? For real? Okay.

Cute, Sasha’s smile toward Asuka actually looked genuine. I miss when Sasha seemed genuine. It’s like Bayley killed that part of her.

“Michael are you forgetting what time it is?” BAYLEY TI-- “It is boss time, baby!” welp my mistake.

I’ve played Asuka’s dialogue to Sasha 3x and I still have no idea what she was saying because of her ridiculous fucking dancing and animation. I’m tired. Bayley come take her title.

Omg now she’s doing “you can’t see me” SHE ACCOMPLISHES NOTHING I absolutely despise her being champion.

Actually she is ready for Asuka, and I’m gonna take great joy in watching her win this Sunday. Sasha is hella unlikeable until the moment that bell rings, then she’s a god. Is what it is.

Booo Sasha was actually doing good on the mic, how dare you ruin that, Carmella.

Asuka is awful. Even Becky and Ronda fought off common enemies once upon a time. Asuka helps legit N O B O D Y. Awful champion.

Highlight: Captain Bayley

---

Survivor Series:

Love Sasha’s gear.

Asuka kicked out at one, quick everyone cry about her selling. Oh wait she’s not Charlotte, my bad.

Beautiful attempt at an armbar by Sasha, whew.

Sasha is so good at this whole wrestling thing lol.

Nice pop up from that backstabber.

Right and in contrast, Asuka is an amazing striker.

Oh a codebreaker to Sasha as she dangles from the second rope. Gorgeous move.

Ahhhh the blue haired god got the job done. I knew she’d win but it’s so gratifying to see.

Not much to say about the match. The spots weren’t brutal or super creative/innovative, but it had GREAT back and forth and really showcased their chemistry in technical wrestling. Also might very well have been the best match they’ve had yet, seemed pretty short though. Still, an enjoyable watch. Good for Sasha.

Lol the disdain in Nia’s face as she looks at Lana.

Look, Bayley’s arm band says ‘captain’ so she’s the captain.

Love seeing how creative people get with their gear at Survivor Series, as opposed to just throwing a damn brand shirt on. Looking at you, 2016.

One thing I’ve learned about Bayley is if she calls you sister, she genuinely likes you behind the scenes. So glad to see Lacey is in her good graces.

Omg Lacey learned how to do a kip up, everybody clap.

Love how the light shines off of Nattie’s gear. Got rainbows popping.

Squatting while stalling a suplex, and synchronized kip ups. Bianca and Nattie are fun.

“Bayley and the great Becky Lynch,” Oh shit, peep that RESPECT we’re putting on her name now? She gets ‘the great’?? wwe finally seeing her on the same level as ‘the great’ Charlotte Flair??? I am shook. Good for her, fucking deserved (also poor Bayley rofl)

Lana tags herself in again lmao. Nia 5 seconds from killing her. Look, Lana tries. Let her try.

I can’t breathe. she been put in timeout.

(referring to a move by Peyton) “I give that a perfect 10“ PPPFFFFTTTT

What a bump by Bayley; a suplex off the top rope onto the entire roster on the outside, and what a great locker room leader to be checking on everyone IMMEDIATELY as if she didn’t just fucking take a massive bump. Also poor Lana standing over there watching the fun lol.

Now I already knew Peyton pinned Bayley cuz of the outrage by Bayley fans who deemed her “buried” afterward, but I think it was a poor decision to have Peyton get that pin. Peyton sucks, not sorry. Have Lacey get that pin before Peyton. Actually, have Lana get that pin before Peyton.

Not sure what Nattie was going for with that submission to Peyton, but she improvised real quick. So points.

Doesn’t Nattie usually wear wrist guards? Awkward seeing her without them.

Goes for a sharpshooter on a woman who’s not even active rn. I’m removing her points lmao.

I legit never get to see Bianca’s 450 splash and you know what? Fuck y’all.

Well Bianca’s a great partner to do a Spanish Fly with so, good on Lacey.

That’s an interesting elimination. Ruby would’ve pinned Shayna as she had rolled back and reversed the Clutch, but the ref was distracted by Nia. By the time he started counting, Ruby had passed out. Interesting.

Crucifix Bomb by Liv eliminates Lacey, fucking dope.

Having Bianca as the last survivor on her team is great for Bianca. This is a compliment from management.

BEAUTIFUL catch by Shayna into the Clutch. Wow that was nice.

Ah we redoing the spot from their Takeover match, IE my introduction to Bianca. Solid.

Oh this is good. Bianca passed out from the Clutch while on the ropes so Shayna was disqualified. Nia drug Bianca out of the ring to put her through the announce table and they started brawling until they were both counted out. 

Again, I knew Lana was the sole survivor but seeing it happen is fucking hilarious. Nice protection for Bianca though, and seeing Nia this pissed off is so cathartic.

Highlight: Bianca was the real standout imo

---

*Survivor Series shined the brightest as we had both a great technical match, and a fun, entertaining multiwoman match filled with shenanigans. If that’s a cop out, then I’ll give it to NXT this week. 

[indigooctopuses]

So im an intern at my dads company, and today I was helpping out in the machine room with the man who works there. He was atractive, like a hot dad, which he was a dad, but i didnt know this at first, turns out hes got a bunch of kids but no wife, he wouldn't tell me his age but hes probably 40 something, and he is just the coolest guy and the most normal teenagery person ive come across at the company. Now i am an unintentional flirt, it just happens, i cant control it, like at all, it juat turns on and ill have catch and ayop myself, but im not aure how to turn it off and it all becomes awkward, and obsviously ive had problems with this, anyway i caught myself flirting, and vibing, BUT HE WAS FLIRTING AND VIBING BACK AND OMG, we spent the day exchanging sex stories and talking about 'experiences' and about how I was tease and an inexperienced virgin and apparently missing out on life. And honestly if I was one of those people who just fucked whoever and enjoyed it and did it for fun, I'd 100% take advantage of this situation, and it was funny because literally told me he was hitting on me and would want to do me, this man is probably about 20years my senior, but it's weird because it didn't feel weird! Like I'd totally go out with him or snuggle or go on dates, he doesn't look that old, he looks like he's 30 something!! But I also found out all about how life and know he's not the type of person I want for me but yeah. That was my day.😂 I mean oh my gosh, what a day, and I was kinda all thinking to myself what are you doinggg you idiot this is ur dad's company, you're flirting with one of his employees, bad bad, he's older bad bad badd, but it happened, but I won't be working with him anymore so yeah story over... or is it😂😅 Also add on sorry it's weird because I've never ever gone for an older guy, let alone flirted with an older guy, all the dudes I flirt with are my age, one year older or younger, I never go outside of that zone because im an inexperienced virgin whos never been in a relationship, just had things and hopped from one guy to the next flirting and friendzoning. But it was super intresting cauz I didn't feel weird, and the situation wasn't that weird to me, I was comfortable, and ugh idk its weird, but it's cool because at the same time it's a confirmation to myself that older guys think I'm attractive, or maybe just that someone thinks I'm attractive. Cool yeah, ok story time over thanks for listening 😅 Also if my dad finds out he will probs kill me and that guy so haaaa, also that guy didn't know that my dad is the big boss😂